#i suggest getting a rabies shot.

[wolken-himmel]

In which (Y/n) ends up in the infirmary because a child wandering around campus bit her.

It turns out that the feral boy is Floyd's and her child from the future.

Request by anon.

"(Y/n), we came as quickly as we could!"

A jolt ran through your body when the door to the infirmary was pushed open with an incredible force. Before you could even begin to recover from the awful noise the hinges produced, you found three figures surrounding your bed.

"What happened to you?" Deuce asked and pointed to your finger in worry. "Someone said you got bitten?"

Ace poked the band-aid that covered the tip of your pointer finger. "Bitten by a feral animal? By Grim?" he asked and began laughing, especially when the cat in question grumbled a few curses of protests.

Much to your amusement, Deuce shot the cat a stern look and wagged his finger in front of his disgruntled eyes. "Grim, what did we tell you?" the blue-haired boy scolded, narrowing his eyes. "Don't bite the hand that feeds you..."

"It wasn't me, I swear!" Grim threw his hands into the air while Ace and you merely laughed your souls out. Your amusement seemed to confuse Deuce, so much that the cat had to explain, "I don't bite people. I have class, you know..."

"Yeah, I was bitten—" you began slowly.

"But you're not bleeding out, are you?" Ace interrupted you and took precautionary step backwards. "And please tell me you didn't get rabies..."

By then, your left eye had begun twitching in frustration — oh, and your ears had begun hurting with all the excessive noise. Before the three could begin arguing amongst each other again, you had already raised your hands to shut them up. "Let me finish my sentences, you idiots!" They quieted down at once, all due to the angry glare you shot them. "No, I got bitten by a child... It was a boy, turquoise blue hair and very very sharp teeth. He couldn't have been older than seven..."

"How... did a child get on campus?" Ace asked with scrunched up eyebrows.

"I don't know..." you grumbled and sank into the soft infirmary bed again — it was much softer than the one back at Ramshackle. After a deep exhale, you closed your eyes and waved the three off. "Just ask Crowley or something."

"And where is the boy now?" Deuce piped up, his eyes flashing with concern. "What if he bites other people? He could seriously hurt someone—"

The red-head rolled his eyes. "It's just a child, you idiot..."

"No, trust me, Ace," you interjected seriously. A series of shivers ran down your back, and something akin to trauma darkened your eyes. "That boy is a menace to society."

"So what do we do now?" Grim asked, panicked.

His blue eyes flashing with utter determination, a bulb seemed to light up above Deuce's head. "We could put up some traps," he suggested while pacing up and down the empty infirmary. "You know, attach some thread to a branch and then prop up a cage. And then use candy as bait."

You clicked your tongue. "That's how you catch a stray cat, not a child..."

°

°

°

"Ugh, why do our professors always give us so much homework? I barely even have time to fulfil my daily squeeze quota anymore! Jade, my whole life is falling apart! What is the purpose of living if I can't have fun?"

"Oh Floyd... please tell me you're finished with the alchemy assignment for tomorrow."

The twins were walking side by side, traversing another courtyard to get to the Mirror Chamber for their shifts at the lounge. Yet, dread already pooled in the depths of Jade's stomach when he looked upon the moody frown on his brother's face. Floyd's mood swings and work didn't mix well at all — it was like throwing oil and water together.

"Nope," Floyd chimed innocently, "haven't even started yet with that stupid assignment."

"The deadline is tomorrow..." Jade furrowed his eyebrows in worry.

His concerned tone merely drew an annoyed scoff from Floyd's pursed lips. "I wasn't in the mood." A whine escaped his lips when he raised his long arms to stretch lazily. His lips twisted downwards into a pout when he suddenly complained, "I haven't seen (Y/n) all day! My little shrimpy would usually bribe me with hugs and what not to do my homework..."

Jade shook his head in disbelief. "By the Great Seven, Floyd..."

Before he could properly begin scolding his brother, a high-pitched voice reached their ears — someone was calling out to them, and the voice was drawing closer. "Daddy!" they managed to discern once the voice was close enough. And almost simultaneously, a young child threw himself into Floyd's arms while continously muttering 'Daddy' over and over again.

Reluctantly moving his arms around the boy to support him, Floyd furrowed his eyebrows in confusion and a tad bit of annoyance. "Huh? What do you want, little guppy?" The sharpness of his eyes softened up though as soon as he found the child's cheeks covered in dried tears. The boy continued wailing and clinging to the Octavinelle student. "Oh my, why are you crying?"

"I-I hurt Mommy earlier!" the boy confessed guiltily. "I bit her! I didn't mean to... I was just so excited to see her again! And I was so happy that I chomped down a little bit too much... It was meant as a love nibble..."

"And where is your mommy?" Jade asked hesitantly.

The boy's mood seemed to increase once he laid eyes upon the other twin. "Uncle Jade! You're here, too!" he exclaimed with a toothy smile.

Floyd and Jade shot each other surprised looks, astonished by the young boy's ease at telling them apart. Yet, with the way he addressed them, they both began to worry.

"I don't remember having a son, Jade..."

"Neither do I."

Before they could ask the child for answers, three figures came running towards them — two Heartslabyul students and a familiar cat monster. All of them were out of breath when they came to a halt in front of the twins.

"Floyd! Step away from that child at once!" Deuce exclaimed and extended his flat hand warningly. "He's dangerous..."

"This little guppy? No, he ain't dangerous at all." A bout of laughter escaped Floyd's lips when he began tickling the boy affectionately. "What's your name, guppy?" he cooed and cradled him gently.

"Nemo!" the boy chimed.

"See?" Floyd drawled. "So cute."

Grim shook his head hastily. "That boy bit (Y/n)!"

The remark caused Jade to tense at once. His limbs suddenly frozen, he only managed to slowly crane his neck at his brother, who was still busy playing with the mysterious boy. Now, on closer look, Jade managed to see the resemblance between the wild boy and the Ramshackle prefect. His disbelief still didn't lessen, somehow, when he carefully asked, "Wait... so (Y/n) is your mother, Nemo?"

The boy immediately piped up happily when that name reached his ears. "Mommy! Where is she?" His toothy smile showed off his razer-sharp teeth. "Is she alright?"

"Great," Ace grumbled under his breath, "so we bought the cage and candy for nothing..."

The revelation had Floyd perking up in utter delight. His bad mood from earlier had disappeared entirely, based on the way he was grinning widely. "Woah, so Shrimpy and I are gonna have little shrimpies together in the future?" Giggles escaped his lips while he threw the child into the air. "I love it! You're making my day, little guppy~"

"If that's the future, you should work hard for it..." Jade muttered mischievously. "Maybe this is a sign by the Great Seven to work on your assignment for tomorrow."

"Nemo, what do you know of alchemy?" Floyd asked, his laughter mixing with his son's giggles. "I'm sure you'll help your daddy work on his assignment, no?"

The question made Jade's smile waver. "Oh, he's hopeless..."

[jhkfan123]

don't forget me (like the others) | coriolanus snow

pairing: mentor!coryosnow x mentor!reader

warnings: mc death, violence, graphic, soft!snow, hysterical reader

in which: the arena tour turned rebel bombing hit you hard. snow, your boyfriend of a few years, came out barely harmed. you however? that was a different story.

wc: 2.8k

a/n: THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR 100 FOLLOWERS!!! I LOVE YOU ALL SO MUCH AND IN RETURN.... 😏....you guys get an absolutely soul crushing fic that almost made me cry while i was writing it. enjoy!!! 🥰 (i'm so sorry)

you were looking forward to your anniversary. three years. you and coryo had agreed to celebrate after your mentor work was done. that included touring the arena and preparing your tributes for the interviews.

you needed this plinth prize. your family wouldn't make it without the prize money in your possession. coryo offered to help you out, but you knew he couldn't contribute much. which meant you had to win the hunger games, or your tribute at least.

if your tribute, jessup diggs, didn't win, you had no shot at affording university. and without university, a well paying job wasn't in the question. so you were going to attempt to make the most out of the two events planned for the day. your boyfriend offered up some valuable advice to you in the days prior. his adjustments to the rules opened up some advantages. with the opportunity of sponsors, you just had to make jessup likable.

after your sit down meeting with jessup, you weren't as confident in his ability to win. his bat bite was getting bad. infection was going to consume him, or even worse some other disease bats could transmit. ebola, rabies, even. either way, it was going to be much harder for him to win. unless the others wiped the other tributes out, and he just waited it out. coryo had suggested that strategy to you. the two of you had talked for hours last night.

either way, it was now time to make your way to the arena. coriolanus, along with clemensia dovecote, had been pulled away, to dr. gaul's office. you hadn't seen him since the tribute meetings. but now, here, outside the gates of the arena, you waited for him.

they claimed they wouldn't start the tour until all mentors were there. that meant coryo. it was good to know he would be here for this. you saw his tribute, lucy gray baird, at the front of the line. she was amazing. a singer, from what you had heard on reaping day. coriolanus had told you that he was planning to get her to sing again. she was fidgeting, waiting for her mentor to arrive. you were too. you looked to your tribute, jessup besides you. he was fairly tall and strong, but he looked weak now. the bite got worse just in the period of time between your meeting and now.

"remember to take in every part of the arena. you need to familiarize yourself." you suggested. he didn't say anything, but nodded. he hadn't spoken much in the time you'd known him. you truly felt bad for him. you weren't supposed to get attached to your tributes. but jessup needed help. from a doctor. anyone. the minute the bell rings this time tomorrow morning, he would have little to no chance of winning. he was just a boy. he was a little younger than you. no one deserves to die that young.

while looking at him, you felt someone place a hand on your shoulder. you looked to your left and found your boyfriend, coryo, his hand resting on you. you de-tensed at his touch. you were glad he was here.

"hi." he was smiling now. he placed a quick kiss on your cheek and grabbed your hand in his.

"hey, coryo." you admired his features as he looked at you. the moment was interrupted when a peacekeeper shoved him forward. probably to align him with lucy gray. you hands were pulled apart. it was sudden. the peacekeepers had no time for pleasantries. when you could see he was next to lucy gray, the line began to move.

after numerous "enjoy the show!'s" you finally made your way in. it was very dark, you could barely see the person in front of you. there was a dim glow from capitol cameras gearing towards the front of the line. suddenly, a loud click allowed for all the windows to open in the arena, sunlight shining in. you gestured for jessup to follow you, and you made your way to coriolanus. he was with his tribute, in the center of the arena.

"do you know how long this is going to take?" you asked, regaining his hand in yours. he glanced over at you, his tribute too.

"they won't let us have much time." he said. he was probably right. it wasn't until a peacekeeper came on the PA system and claimed that you had 15 minutes to "tour the arena and discuss strategy." you nodded at the announcement. "stay by me, please. i wan't you safe. none of these tributes are cuffed." he said. you looked around. none of them seemed like immediate threats. they saw and were aware of the multiple peacekeepers assigned to each one. but you still, felt safer near coriolanus.

you turned to jessup, who was already looking around the arena. you surveyed it too. there was no where to go. it was a colosseum. a big circle with no escape. no where to go besides the main circle. you knew the games would be over quickly tomorrow. but you didn't want to tell jessup that. you assumed he already knew. but you had to say something. make use of this time.

as you opened your mouth, you were cut off by a loud boom. then another, then another, and another. you had no idea what was going on. you fell to the floor from the wind pushing you around. dust was everywhere. getting into your eyes and mouth and nose. suffocating. the loud noises kept on going. then you heard crumbling. the roof must have been falling. concrete was beginning to land everywhere around you. you heard shouting. then, you could identify a more specific voice. that of coriolanus's. he was shouting incoherently. you couldn't see him through the dust that hadn't yet settled. the loud booms stop, but the sound of the arena actively crumbling continued. you then felt sharp pains. in your legs, your arms, everywhere.

glass. it was getting everywhere.

you couldn't move. you were in a state of shock. and you were flat on the floor. every time you tried to crawl your body wouldn't budge. your boyfriend was still shouting things you couldn't make out. the ringing in your ears was too loud.

then he got closer. you could hear him better now. he was repeating the same word.

"MOVE!" you heard. he kept repeating himself. you understood him, but your brain wasn't working quite right. you still couldn't move. suddenly, you heard a screeching sound. metal. you managed to turn yourself onto your back. it was a bad idea. it wasn't until it was too late when you realized that the metal beam was falling in your direction. when you saw it become increasingly near, your body attempted to trigger fight or flight. you tried to move out of the way but it was too late. the beam slammed into you and everything went dark.

the first thing you heard was your heartbeat. then you heard some sort of beeping. then your sight came in. blurry at first, but your eyes eventually focused on a blank ceiling. you took a deep breath and attempted to move your head. looking around, you identified the room around you as some sort of hospital room.

the next thing you became conscious of was the fact that something hurt like hell. you pinpointed it to somewhere on your leg, but you couldn't see. you wondered if you were alone. that was soon proven wrong when you noticed a certain blonde standing in the far corner of the room. he was talking to a doctor. the words were incoherent. then you noticed something unsettling. there were streaks of tears down his face.

that couldn't be good.

soon he noticed you were awake, and immediately rushed to your side.

"oh my god, are you up?" you could tell by his shaky voice that he had been crying. hard. you nodded and he broke out into a smile. he brushed your hair from your forehead and replaced it with a kiss. you smiled back at him.

"what happened?" you asked. his smile faded at your question.

"there was a rebel bombing. seven died." the number hurt your heard.

"seven? seven..mentors? tributes?" you asked. you weren't sure how that was going to help you.

"a mix of both. mostly tributes." he answered. you knew you had been unfit for this mentor position. you were far too empathetic for this. you shouldn't have started crying at the tribute's deaths. but you did. coriolanus immediately noticed. he shushed you and wiped your tears with his handkerchief.

"hey. remember. it would have been worse to die in the games tomorrow, right?" his attempt at making you feel better did nothing much. his answer also confused you. it would be cruel to continue with the games tommorow.

"the games are still happening?" you asked. he nodded with a melancholy feeling. "that's- awful." you couldn't believe the acts of the capitol. "which mentors are...gone?" you hesitated to even say it.

"diana and apollo. felix ravinstill is in critical condition." you had known the siblings well. and felix, well, his dad was president. this would not go unnoticed.

"oh no." you sighed. he grabbed your hand and intertwined it with his.

"it's going to be ok. you're going to be ok." there was something strange about the statement. it was like he was reassuring himself and not you. you nodded, almost hesitantly. "i should have helped you. i just stood there and shouted like an idiot-"

"don't start with that. please. don't kick yourself for it." you re-assured him. then you felt a sharp pain in your leg. you winced. you hissed through your teeth and the unexpected feeling.

"what? what? what it is?" he was immediately shot into a state of panic.

"my leg!" you shouted. it felt like it was on fire. you immediately reached down to grab where it hurt out of instinct, and when you released it, you found blood on your hands, and lots of it. "my hands!" you shouted, tears running down your face. coryo was now standing up.

"we need a doctor! please!" he pleaded. you began to sob as it was the only thing you could think of to do. you watched as coriolanus looked down at your leg. he looked back up almost immediately, which was not a good sign. through thick, hot tears you saw a figure walk into the room with a team of men behind him. you saw as they ushered him out into the hallway. that only made you increasingly nervous.

you panicked as the lights began to fade again.

you were in a new room now. this one felt more, eerie. your boyfriend was sat beside you, his head in his hands. the only thing you could do was reach your arm out to his. he immediately jolted at your touch.

"coryo what happened?" it was all you could think about.

"um.." he stuttered. his breath was very shaky. "look. you lost-" he paused. "a lot of blood. in your leg. too much." he continued. you immediately got concerned.

"too much? what do you mean too much?" you mind began to race to every possible bad outcome.

"you're in critical condition." he finally blurted out what he had been meaning to say all along. your heart began to beat much faster.

"no. no. no. no. no. no. no-"

"hey, hey hey it's ok-"

"no." you began to cry again. in panem, you didn't know of very many people who made it out of critical condition. "coryo, i-" you paused. you considered lying to yourself. you considered thinking that everything was going to be ok. "i'm scared." you shuddered. instead, you went with the truth. "i-" the words you wanted to say made you want to throw up.

"what? please. tell me." he asked.

"i don't want to die." the phrase broke the wall between tears and sobs. admitting that death was a possibility in this situation made everything worse. no matter what comfort he would attempt to give you.

"you're not going to die. you're not going to die." he repeated. he once again seemed to be finding comfort in his own words.

"how do you know that?" you cried.

"i don't." he admitted. "but i don't want to think of anything like that until it becomes the most likely possibility. if it ever does." you saw a tear roll down his face.

you knew your body. you knew the condition you were in better than any of those doctors. so with a heavy heart, you did anything but ease your boyfriend's mind.

"coryo." there was now multiple tears scattered on his cheeks. "coryo." you picked his head up with your head. "it is the most likely possibility." you could immediately tell that he had already known that. his head fell again and you heard quiet cries. you rolled onto your back, the position you had started in. you looked up at the ceiling.

you had never been fond of death. it had always scared you, since you were a little girl. you had always hated the idea of the hunger games. you had watched one year and never again. mentoring in the hunger games was hard. you hated the games. the deaths were unnecessary. and each time the buzzer ruled them out, you just thought of their family.

and now that was happening to you. you knew that the buzzer would soon rule you out. you didn't know when. you knew how. and you knew that, it was going to be sooner rather than later.

you were terrified.

"i'm scared." you repeated. you tried to move your mind to something else. you found one thing, and it didn't help. "coryo. today's our anniversary." three years. you had almost forgot in the chaos of today. "i'm sorry we couldn't enjoy it." you continued to stare at the ceiling.

"it's not your fault." his voice was stern. "besides. we are spending time together. look at us. like our own private date." his joke somehow made you laugh.

"thank you for being here. i haven't even seen my parents." you admitted.

"they are outside. they just said they couldn't bear to see you like this." you admired coriolanus's bravery. you knew that your leg was not a pretty sight. the huge gash slicing it open. it was at this moment you began to feel lightheaded. you knew the blood loss was getting to you. you knew death was getting to you.

"coryo?" you asked for him. you turned over to face him again. he looked up at you. "can i have a kiss?" now usually he was rough, aggressive with his affections. but at this command, he was soft. he gave you a soft kiss on the lips and nothing more. you appreciated that this may be the last kiss you would share. "coryo?" you called for him again.

"yes?" he answered.

"do you promise you won't forget me when i'm gone?" your voice shook immensely. he didn't even try to counteract your statement. he knew.

"i could never forget you if i tried." you heard his voice quiver. "you're my love. my one and only love. i'll never love again." he declared.

"no, no don't do that. please. enjoy your life, ok? promise me you'll find somebody else to love." you closed your eyes. you couldn't bear the thought. it pained you to say it but it was necessary.

"i'll never love somebody as much as i love you." he grabbed your hand and pressed a kiss to it. a doctor came into the room. one wo had probably been monitoring your vitals from outside. all he did was give coriolanus a nod. you immediately saw tears fall from his face, though no sound was heard.

you focused on your heartbeat. you knew that time was ticking, and the doctor had just silently confirmed it. listening to your heartbeat, you noticed every once in a while, the beats would get farther apart.

"look, i-"

"i know what's happening." you couldn't bare to hear him say it. his tears became more rapid. you had stopped crying, however. you just wanted to be here with him.

"i'm going to stay, ok? i don't care how long it takes. i'm not leaving you." he stated. he tried to be loud even though his tears were silencing his words.

"just hold my hand." it was all you asked of him. "i love you." you said.

"i love you more." he replied, almost immediately. it had been a tradition the two of you had come up with. if one said "i love you," the other had to try to say it back as quick as possible. bonus points if you overlapped. the small gesture made you smile. you finally decided to close your eyes, and relax your body.

you heard the beeping turn into one long sound as you took a deep breath in. the last thing you heard was the boy next to you finally break down in a loud cry.

[creepzkilla]

No because

Here me out

Toby with a mommy kink 😳

Maybe she's very caring for him and tends to him a lot when he's around her. So he just sort of gets turned on whenever she does things that are motherly like tending to his wounds or making him something to eat, maybe even her worrying might get to him.

Toby gives me the vibes of pretending to be sick just to have her give her full attention (and have his faced squished between her tits when she cuddles him and strokes his hair)

Like I don't know if this is weird but it's just a thought 👀

no bc i agree wtf?!? i feel like he would be a switch leaning dom. but he fs fakes being sick or purposely trying to get hurt to have her patch him up…. he’s a good amount of needy but when he’s like this; he absolutely needs to be touching u somehow…. whether it be holding you, fucking you, fingering you, cuddling— anything intimate. let me know if i should do a full HC post on this bc this was just a dabble🤭

NSFW. tw: mommy kink, marking, cock warming

mommy kink! toby is lowkey…he tends to hide his fantasies out of wanting to protect his persona… but toby needs to be touching you at all times…. he loves wrapping his arm around you and giving u chaste kissing on your neck

mommy kink! toby loves to cock warm… it’s just such an intimate feeling of being that close to you— so warm and comfortable.

mommy kink! toby purposely trying to get hurt on missions so he could come to your house in the middle of the night and have you dote on him. he loves it the way your obnoxiously soft hands roam across his body looking for any bruises or cuts

mommy kink! toby following you around like a lost puppy— well more like an attack dog… he ain’t no submissive bitch he’ll bite anyone who comes near u /hj 😓 i suggest getting him a rabies shot

mommy kink! toby loves leaving marks on you, especially your stomach… leaving kisses and bite marks across your sensitive chests, neck and shoulders

mommy kink! toby definitely steals your underwater and loves to runt into them… just like regular hc! toby… all versions of toby loves to see ur panties… perv™️

mommy kink! toby loves seeing you around kids… your just so gentle and caring around babies and the way that would look pregnant drives him insane. even thought he can’t get you pregnant (i have firm belief that the turned pastas aren’t able to procreate… or if they do the baby would die bc of the operator😔) he’ll still want to attempt to by cock warming you for hours, cumming into you multiple times bc ur just so pretty

mommy kink! toby is your house wife, he’ll cook, clean, treat you like a princess… but he doesn’t know how to cook so be on stand by

[theghoulgirl]

Adoration (Keith Kogane/Reader)

A 1,300 word oneshot that takes place after the war in which Keith and the reader both live together. Pretty much a slice-of-life in which they both get ready for bed on a cold winter night. (18+)

I also know I am writing for a pretty lifeless fandom, but alas, I wrote this because I wanted to. Not because I expect much traffic to come across it. If you do happen to stubble upon it, then I hope you enjoy!

As the sun wore down on the horizon, it covered the small town in a frigid chill. Luckily the two lovers were tucked away indoors in a desperate attempt to fend off the cold that crept outdoors. But despite their attempt, the youngest of the love birds could not effectively beat the freezing temperatures that had washed over the country. 

“Keith, my dearest?” 

“Yes hon?”

“I actually cannot feel my hands anymore.” Keith and (y/n) were snuggled up on the leather loveseat that sat in the living room of their house, with the memories of war behind them in the not-so-distant past. To further prove her point, she decided to stick an ice-cold hand under his shirt and rest it on his stomach.

Keith let out a surprised gasp and gently shoved her away with a bellowing cackle. “Dear god, go take a hot shower or something! What the actual hell, how is that human? Are you human? That’s not human. ” 

(Y/n) let out a giggle at his rapid fire comments. “I’m not so sure I am anymore. Or maybe you’re not human, especially considering you are still as fiery as a furnace.” 

“Yes. I am not fully human, we know this.” Keith waved his hand in a small circle. 

“But that?” He pointed down at her hands “That is not human. I know human, and this ain’t it.” (Y/n) rolled her eyes at his antics and sat crossed legged next to him with her arms stretched above her head. 

“Well it’s nearly a blizzard out there! You also won’t let me turn the temperature up, so I’m cold!” Although he is right about taking a shower. It’s nearly time for bed and my face feels incredibly gross. (Y/n) stared at Keith’s face in contemplation. 

In a moment of courage, she whispered “Take a shower with me?”Keith shot her a gleeful smirk.

“There wouldn’t be any actual bathing if I joined. So, unfortunately,  I am going to have to pass on your tempting offer.”

“But it would be fun and then I’d get to have, not one, but two different heat sources.” A crimson heat spread across her cheeks at the suggestiveness of her first comment. The corner of Keith’s eyes crinkled as his grin widened, and he patted her on as a sign to get up. 

“Now. Go get a shower. You’re an ice cube and I do not have a nuclear core to keep you warm.”

“Fine. Fine. I’m going.”

After her vision cleared from standing up too quickly, (y/n) wrapped her jacket closer to her and waddled to the shared bathroom. She turned the shower nozzle to the highest setting, which could be equated to the surface temperature of the sun. While waiting for the water to warm, she removed her makeup that has been resting on her skin for far too long. Keith decided at the moment the mascara was being removed, to walk in and lean against the door frame with an adoring expression. 

“Your eyes look like a raccoon.” 

“Fuck off Kogane.” He let out a playful ‘no’ in response and squeezed her waist with one hand as he passed by to grab his toothbrush and toothpaste. Keith nudged her hip with his to get her to scoot over so he had access to the sink. During the time that Keith began to brush his teeth, (y/n) had removed the rest of her make-up, racoon eyes included. She then began to notice the toothpaste foaming around Keith’s mouth. 

“Keith, my love, have you been out in the woods recently?” He cocked his head to the side in confusion at the strange question and spit a wad of toothpaste into the sink. 

“Not recently, but I did go this past weekend. Why?”

“Because you look like you caught rabies. Think we may need to get the vaccine for it.” (Y/n) smiled mischievously at her punch line and started to undress. Keith rolled his eyes at the joke and rinsed out his mouth. He grabbed the edge of his shirt and wiped off the excess water from his face. 

“Ha-ha.” Keith sarcastically replied. “Very funny. Truly, a master comedian. Seriously, we should sign you up for the giggle hut.” 

Now in the steaming hot water, (y/n) replied. “Oh yeah? Well I think you and I should do a dou act. We could call ourselves ‘The Racoon and the Rabies Virus’! Our entire act is just Steven King’s Cujo, but with a rabid raccoon instead.” Keith let out a genuine laugh at the comment and began to exit the room. 

“Well, while you’re in there, I’ll be sure to send an email about our inquiry.” He shut the bathroom door with a soft ‘click’. 

After the shower, (y/n) emerged into the bedroom with two towels wrapped around her hair and body. She began to rifle through her closet looking for pajamas, but also kept an eye on Keith’s side of the closet. 

Keith sat on the bed with his legs bent and a tablet resting on his thighs, but his attention was solely on his partner the moment she waltzed in. A bright blush unfurled across his face as (y/n) tossed clothes onto the bed. With the last throw of a shirt, that does indeed belong to him, he snapped his attention back to the tablet and cleared his throat. 

“I-um.” Keith bit his lip and began to fidget with his hands. “You know you’re indescribably beautiful, right?” 

A wide smile bloomed across (y/n) face at the compliment, which normally is not verbally expressed by Keith since he uses physical touch or action as a medium of love. Though, along with the smile, her face also began to flush and she vocalized “I know my love. But it will always mean a lot coming from you.”

The two lovers gazed into each other as they got lost in the wonderment and adoration of the other. 

What have I done to deserve someone as wonderful as her?

How in the world did I find someone like him?

As the sweet moment passed, a slow awkwardness began to settle in the air. (Y/n) started giggling. “It’s going to be very weird now when I take off my towels to put on my clothes.” 

Keith laughed along at her comment as a playful look shot across his eyes. “No, it’s only weird if we make it weird. And my dear, this is not the first time you’ve gotten dressed in front of me, let alone have been nude.” He let out a sound of surprise as he dodged the towel that came flying at his head as (y/n) took off her hair towel. 

“Put that over your head. I do not want you to look at me while I get dressed.” Keith, while laughing, obliged her request and draped the towel over his head. (Y/n) swiftly got dressed. 

Keith looks like a sheet ghost. 

“Okay, you’re in the clear.” Keith pulled off the towel and chucked it into the hamper. He picked up his tablet and put it on the side table before he opened up his arms as an invitation. (Y/n) approached the bed with a shy composure and lifted the duvet to crawl in and cuddle into his arms. She turned and rested her cheek against his shoulder and pressed a small kiss to his collarbone. Keith in response pressed a lingering kiss atop the crown of her head. They both took an individual inhale and exhaled as they sunk into the soft comfort of each other. Keith rubbed his hand up and down her shoulder as he said “Want me to turn off the lights?” 

(Y/n) nodded in reply. Keith slapped the switch that was above the headboard and settled deeper into the pillows. 

Despite the frost that was forming spirals on the window, the cold that was seeping through the floorboards, and the radiator rumbling in the basement, the lovers were both toasty between the heat that had formed between them. As the night wore and the wind grew colder, they dozed off into a dreamless slumber.

[ariesqueencobra]

what we used to be | Vl

Pairing: Eli Moskowitz x Fem!Reader

Summary: You're going on a first date! Queue training montage, you make Eli a get well soon card, and you're at the movies!

Warnings: kissing, dangerous activties, mentions of rabies, shots, and hospitals, injury

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: I'm gonna hop on here and post this real quick. It's a cute chapter and I like it! I already know what direction I want this series to go, but the storyline I have in my head might change if this would be considered an insert fic. I'll probably ask for opinions in the future cause I really don't want it to not be an insert fic so be on the look out for that! I also want to stress the importance of reblogging fics, on mobile you can hold down the two arrows button and quick reblog this post so that other people can see my work! Just liking this story won't do anything to help me as a writer, if you really enjoyed reading it, just do the simple thing and reblog! It would also be appreciated if you commented! Doing those things tell me people want to read this story and want more, which will encourage me to keep writing!

Thank you to those who already reblog and comment, I see you and I love you all for it!

I don't consent to this work being copied, translated or reposted.

“Eli, where are we going?” You chuckled, holding onto his hand as he led you through the forest.

The leaves crunched under your feet and the breeze made you shiver so you were grateful you listened to him when he told you to bring a sweater for your first date. Though, you still weren’t sure where that would be or what it was. 

You hoped it was romantic, this being your first-ever date after all, but when you almost slipped on some mud, you weren’t too sure about it anymore.

“Trust me, you’re gonna love it,” he grinned, holding you tighter and closer. 

You smiled, watching him as he kept his eyes ahead until you turned to see what he was staring at, that’s when you noticed as well. The gasp you let out as you made it onto a dock, the beautiful lake expanding outward, and the trees with orange and yellow leaves made such a breathtaking view.

“You like it?” He asked.

“It’s beautiful,” you shook your head in disbelief, sitting on the edge and letting your feet dangle over the water. “We used to come here all the time, I forgot how amazing the view was.”

“I figured it’d be the perfect spot for our first date,” he smiled, sitting down next to you. “Like old times, but now we can make new memories.”

“So we’re having a picnic?” You beamed, realizing the plastic bag in his hand did hold some purpose.

He handed you the bag and you set it in your lap, rifling through the numerous snacks you loved.

“All your favorites. And your art supplies, I knew you would love to recreate that painting you have in your room,” he suggested.

The scenery was a notable piece in your room, a small collection you had of various locations in the Valley. It was the first collection you ever painted so it was sweet that Eli knew you’d appreciate an opportunity to update a piece.

“Did I ever tell you you’re the best boyfriend ever?” You reached over to kiss his cheek. You were about to reach for your art supplies in your bag when he stopped you, moving your head to kiss you on the lips. It was a long, heartfelt kiss, making you giddy. “Eli,” you giggled pulling away, unable to help your laughter.

“You know you can call me Hawk, right?” He pinched your chin lightly. 

You nodded. “But you’re Eli to me,” you explained, gaze softening. 

“Yeah but Hawk’s way more badass,” he shrugged. 

“I think Eli is just as badass,” you smirked, leaning into his space. 

“I guess just you then,” he gave in. “You can call me whatever you want, babe,” he chuckled, pecking your lips one more time.

You both stayed on that dock for hours until your dad was calling for you to come home. The date was simple and small but it was the most memorable night you’ve had with Eli, your boyfriend.

~

You were standing in the middle of a junkyard, unsure what the purpose of your being here was. But you stood next to Eli and Aisha as you watched as Sensei opened a beer can, chugging it before he wiped his mouth, glancing down at all of you. 

“You’ve trained hard. You’ve gotten stronger, tougher, faster. You’ve done your best. You’re ready for this tournament, am I right?”

“Yes, Sensei!” You shouted.

“Wrong!” He slammed the beer on the ground at your feet.

You flinched when the beverage splashed onto you.

“Your best ain’t shit, if you wanna win the tournament, you gotta give me better than your best, which is why from now on, you’re gonna get my worst. Do you understand?” He shouted.

“Yes, Sensei!”

You felt empowered at his pep talk, ready for whatever he was going to throw at you. While part of your mind was sounding alarms that this was dangerous, you ignored it.

“Are you losers?” 

“No, Sensei!”

“Are you nerds?”

“No, Sensei!”

“Are you sure?”

“No, Sensei!”

You caught your mistake, biting down on your lip to suppress your laugh. And you saw the way Sensei groaned in response before he commanded the group.

“Move those feet! Go!”

He pointed to where there were a bunch of tires lined up. 

Miguel led the way, moving his feet through the holes. Eli was next and you followed behind Eli, weaving your feet through the tires as fast as you could.

“Your enemies are all around you. Destroy them!” Sensei barked.

You began wreaking havoc, smashing the end of the wood plank into the car doors, it was fun and funneling so much anger and hate out of you.

After the short-lived destruction, you were led to a container filled with scrap metal and glass, something that uneased you. The feeling of fear bubbled in your stomach but you swallowed it, knowing fear did not exist.

Miguel made it without a scratch. Then it was Eli’s turn to walk the plank and your breath hitched when his foot slipped. Thankfully he made it and you were able to say you still had a boyfriend. When it was your turn, your legs shook, arms held at either side of you. You crossed, a smile on your face and your boyfriend waiting on the other side with a victory kiss.

Going back to the tires, you were already out of breath, the exhaustion coursing through you and it showed with the rest of the team when Aisha tripped, causing Miguel to fall, then you, then Eli—all on top of each other.

Groaning in pain, Eli’s elbow dug into your back and you tried to get off Miguel without hurting him as well. 

“Sorry,” you winced, pushing off your friend’s back once Eli was off you. “You alright?”

“Yeah, Aisha, you good?” Miguel asked to which she nodded, face contorted in pain.

Sensei ordered you all to stand in the middle of the scrap yard, something in his hand.

“If you wanna win, you gotta be hungry. Are you guys hungry?” He handed each of you a piece of jerky.

You grimaced at the smell, wondering if you had to eat it. 

“Yes, Sensei!”

“Good, 'cause so are they,” he smirked before blowing a whistle, barks following through.

Your eyes widened and you immediately bolted, jumping onto a car and finding the highest place. Your heart raced as you searched for your friends but as you scanned over the yard, all you could find was a terrified Eli as he attempted to escape a starving dog. 

~

“Are you sure you’ll be okay?” You asked, hand tracing over the bandages. 

It was hours later now and you came over to see your boyfriend after he had to go to the hospital for a rabies shot. You wished you could go, but it was agreed among both your parents that you’d visit him after.

“Yeah, I got pain meds for the bite, the shot didn’t even hurt,” he smirked, lying in his bed. 

“I was scared to death,” you blew out a breath. “I’m so glad you’re okay,” you couldn’t help it and threw your arms around him.

He hugged you back, squeezing you tight as you held on. “I’ll live, nothing to worry about, babe,” he reassured.

“I know,” you pulled away, face down. “I spoke to my parents when you were in the hospital, this whole incident made them less happy about me being in Cobra Kai,” you admitted.

“My parents agree,” he sighed, glancing out into the hall where his mom and dad were downstairs. “But they don’t know how much better it’s made us,” he grabbed your hand, squeezing it. 

“I know,” you squeezed back. “I’m really glad you’re okay.”

“Me too,” he met your gaze, smiling. 

“I made you this, by the way,” you reached behind you and grabbed the card you made him.

It read: “Damn, got bit by a dog? That’s ruff, hope you get better soon!” with a drawing of a dog with a mohawk.

“That’s amazing,” he laughed. “Thanks, you’re the best,” he reached over to kiss you on the cheek.

Warmth radiated before you spoke. “I’ll see you tomorrow then, goodnight,” you hugged him again, pulling away and giving him a generous peck on the lips. 

He watched as you left his room, hearing you go down the stairs, say bye to his parents, and shut the door.

~

Your gaze was on the movie but Eli’s constant flicking of candy at other moviegoers was distracting. On top of Aisha asking what was wrong with Miguel. Their conversation was anything but whispering. You began droning in on their conversation, Miguel saying why Sam’s dad would hate him and whatnot. 

You were eating some popcorn, taking a sip of your drink, and trying to watch the movie but the side conversation and Eli’s distracting movements were well, distracting.

“Jesus Christ, you’re such a nerd,” he insulted Miguel, stepping into the conversation.

You furrowed your brows, reaching for his hand, sending him a look he brushed off. You rolled your eyes, leaning to the side to rest your head on his shoulder. You smiled when you noticed he paused, staring at you with awe.

Aisha went on to comfort Miguel and you were enjoying the movie again but Eli still managed to throw the candy, pissing you off. 

You straightened, leaning on the other side of your seat, and rested your head on your arm, staring bored at the screen. 

“Dude, just go over there. It’s an alpha move,” your boyfriend responded to what Miguel was talking about. With another flick of his wrist, a candy hit the back of someone’s head, instantly, a built dude stood up asking who did that, you had to hide your smile at the look on Eli’s face.

After the movie finished, you and Aisha departed from the boys, deciding to go shopping.

“You seemed pretty pissed at Hawk, something going on?” She asked when you entered a store. 

“He was being annoying, like why throw candy? It’s wasteful, just watch the movie!” You scolded, rolling your eyes. “I love the dude, but, ugh, sometimes he’s just,” you huffed, unable to find the words.

“A boy?” She finished for you.

“Exactly,” you shook your head, a smile coming on your face.

“This is one of those moments where the saying “boys will be boys” is actually justified,” she raised a brow. 

“You get me,” you sighed. “I’m so glad I have a girl friend,” you wrapped your arm around her, walking further into the store.

“Tell me about it,” she agreed.

[weirdtinkerbellversion]

Just got out of The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes and I loved it so much but as always, I have thoughts and feelings. So here's the initial observation. FULL SPOILERS for The Ballad of Songbirds and Snakes BELOW you have been warned.

First of all, I loved the way they organized it and the fact that they kept the 3 acts clearly defined the same way the books did, and the opening scene is brilliant. Putting it at the forefront like that gives you all you need to know to understand Corio later. The acting is phenomenal, the songs (I could die). All in all, kudos. Absolutely brilliant. Now to the things I wish they had done differently.

First, changing the sequence of events in the arena. I understand we're on a time limit but there are details that to me, reading the book, I felt were too important not to put in. Examples below.

One: the fact that Lucy's poisoned water does not kill Wovey, only Dill. Don't get me wrong, they both get the point across and the fact that Lucy is in fact responsible for someone younger and weaker than her dying, but I feel like in the films, they established this stronger connection between Lucy and Wovey in a couple of scenes, including them holding hands as they walk into the games, and Wovey being killed by that bottle would have really pushed things in a way I would have liked to see.

Two: the way they changed Reaper and his behavior and his ending. What I loved about Reaper in the books was his defiance in silence. Everything he did for the tributes he did without ever saying a word, which in my opinion was more powerful than when he yells in the films, but that's a minor detail. What I didn't like was that he was killed by the snakes and we don't get to see Lucy use his graveyard and the flag against him, doing that little cat and mouse dance until he dies. His death in the movie was shot beautifully, with his arms wide, sitting among the dead bodies he compiled, poetic as fuck, but give me the book death because it says so much about both his and Lucy's characters.

Three: this is a more minor detail but I wish they hadn't changed the way Lysistrata handles Jessup's death and his rabies. Instead of her offering to save Lucy by sending all this water, it's Coryo who suggests it out of the blue and Lys doesn't like it.

My second issue with the film is that I felt act 3 was a little rushed in its storytelling. We get all the events for the most part but I felt like they were running out of time and trying to cram everything that happens in these last 45 minutes. For example, we see them hunting the Mockingjays but we never get an explanation, we never understand what they're doing (for viewers who have not read the book). And because of that, we see so much less of this hatred that Coryo has for the mockingjays that is so well set up in the book. We also get the results of Snow's aptitude test out of the blue as well. I wish we had gotten a little more insight into the life that he and Sejanus led for a bit to contextualize everything and to help us connect even more. Even Sejanus' exclusion from the trip to the lake and the relationship with the Covey made me a little sad because those moments in the books helped make the separation and realization of "betrayal" if you want to call it that even more poignant. It helped us see how truly selfish Coryo is and his lack of connection with anyone in that part of his life.

Third, I wish we had seen him throw away his mother's compact and his photos of his family and only keeping his father's compass as he leaves District 12. That moment in the book was so important for me. We see him becoming more like his father and throwing away the things that remind him of his mother and Tigris who were the kinder people in his life.

Anyway, this was a long rant about things that popped into my head while I was watching. The film is absolutely brilliant and I didn't want it to end and I want more songs and soundtracks and I'll definitely be rewatching it when I can.

[baratiddyappreciator]

Heyyy can I request the Baki cast with an s/o who once had an ass but lost it thanks to weight loss and now they feel super insecure about it?

Pls and thank youuuu (if you don’t want to then pls ignore me)

Of course! My pleasure to oblige!

Baki:

Once again, more of a chest guy, but once he finds out that you're insecure about your butt then he's going to do his best to get your confidence back up. So what if there's less there now? There's still enough for him to grab, and frankly, he thinks you're perfect just the way you are.

He'll hype you up every chance he gets. Are you wearing new pants? Oh he's going to do a double-take and tell you that your ass looks great in those.

He's still a really touchy guy, so if he walks past you he'll still grab your hips or give your butt a little smack. He's down bad for you, no matter what your features may be, because to him, you're perfect.

That being said, he is tragic with words, so at some point he might find an old picture of you and go "damn, you were so thick!" or something like that not realizing immediately that that might upset you.

Kozue:

She understands body insecurity, she used to be really insecure about her body herself, she sometimes catches herself thinking that she could be taller or curvier, or maybe her eyes could have been lighter or darker. But the second she hears that you're insecure because of something, that's it, she's stepping up.

You don't like how small your butt is? You're going with her to the gym after school to do some squats, get you a proper cake, and it has the added bonus of you two being able to spend time with Baki, who is generally a ray of sunshine.

She's going to hype you up as much as possible, lots of telling you that you're beautiful and perfect. Is that an excuse for her to grab your ass? No, but she'll use it as one. She means it in a playful and reaffirming way, of course.

Hanayama:

He doesn't get insecurity. I mean, yeah, he understands how some people wouldn't find him attractive because his scars, but is he insecure about them? No.

That being said, he gives very quiet reassurance. If you're upset or feeling down, he's there, and he's going to talk it out with you. By the end of it, you probably end up really emotional because he's trying to logic this out, and he just winds up confused as to why you're upset.

He's got money, so if you're open to the idea and think it would help with your own self-esteem, he's willing to pay for you to go get some work done. He wants you to be happy with yourself.

That being said, he's terrified to bring up the suggestion. He doesn't want you to take it the wrong way, but he doesn't want you being insecure and upset with yourself. He'll suggest other ways first, of course, but if you want results faster then he'll make the offer as gently as possible.

Chiharu:

Bruh fym you don't like your ass?? He LOVES your ass! It's an ass! Butts are great! As a matter of fact, let him give you a list of reasons why your butt is great and perfect and why you should let him see it all the time.

For real, he doesn't understand why you'd be insecure. It's not like your ass is concave, that's pretty hard to do (and definitely not healthy, your muscles are in a bad state if they're bending the opposite way bestie, he is worried then). You still have two buttcheeks, and those = ass. Ass is ass, and he loves yours.

He'll make jokes about his own ass being flat just to distract you from whatever sad train of thought you're on. We all know his ass isn't flat, none of these men have a flat ass, but the sheer absurdity of things that come out of his mouth is insanely distracting.

He'll still bite your ass if given the chance. No hesitation or remorse, he's feral, get him his rabies shots asap.

Katsumi:

He's very practical about how to solve the issue. He's on top of it, once you tell him you feel insecure he's off doing research on how to boost self esteem. At one point, he's dragging you along on his morning workouts, he has you pull cards from a positive affirmation jar, he helps you with a skincare routine, reminds you to drink more water, all of it.

He wants to help you feel more secure overall, not just about one particular thing, and he's got the resources to do so. He's going to use those resources. If he needs to call his mom and have her bring you some soup, he will, don't test him.

He doesn't really have any insecurities, Katsumi is a pretty confident man most of the time when it comes to his looks, he knows he's handsome, but he might open up about some of his deeper insecurities.

He wants you both to be able to improve on areas that you're insecure on, and he's confident that with your help, he can become a far more confident person.

Jack:

He gets body insecurity, honestly. He's proud of where he is, don't get him wrong, but he knows what it's like probably better than anyone else in this lineup, and sometimes he looks at himself and sees all of his flaws. Fortunately, when you mention your own, he knows what to do.

You wind up getting dragged to a mirror with him standing behind you, making you list out every flaw, and with every word about what you see wrong, he tells you three things he sees as beautiful. He will make you cry.

After he makes you ugly sob and ruin his sweater (he doesn't care, he can wash it, duh) he's going to start dragging you along with him to the gym. He can push it pretty hard, he knows that, but with you, it's about teaching you to gain confidence and learn healthier habits.

He's willing to take time out of his workout to help you. Trying a deadlift? He's telling you the proper form, demonstrating, coaching your form and then watching you do your first lift. Bench-pressing? He's your spotter, and he's incredibly attentive about it. He is behind you the entire time, and he wants you to know that.

Kosho:

He's really quiet the first time you tell him about your insecurity, and honestly, you'd be forgiven for thinking that he doesn't care. It's not until you finish talking and might start crying that he passes you a box of tissues, pulls you into a hug and starts talking about his own insecurities as well.

It turns into a mini-therapy session for the both of you. Sometimes all we need is to get our burdens off of our chests for a little while with someone who understands and we can trust.

He never used to have so many scars, especially the ones all over his face, and while he sees them as a badge of honor and a reminder of what can go wrong, they still change how he also views himself.

He'll make it a point for you both to say something nice about yourselves and each-other before you both turn in for the night. If he thinks you haven't said anything good about yourself, he's going to sit there and wait until you do.

Kureha:

He gets you a therapist right away. He deals with a lot all day, but he's also not able to help you delve into insecurity and address it in a healthy way. He does slip a bit into his professional self, where he'll sit up a bit straighter and use that one Calm Doctor tone.

He wants you to feel better, but he's good at healing bodies, not minds. He knows that you'll need support to get through your insecurities though, so he'll tone down the bitchiness a little bit. He knows when it's appropriate and when it isn't.

This being said, he's not afraid of being a complete jerk to get you mad at him instead of upset at yourself, even for a few minutes. He's very good at pissing people off, it's a natural talent of his.

He does take the time to appreciate every part of you. If there's an insecurity about one part, there's bound to be more about other parts, and he's going to make sure that you see yourself as perfectly as he does.

Retsu:

This man is like a warm hug coming in from the cold. He might not understand entirely, but he knows that you're not feeling well about yourself, and he'll do his best to help you feel as loved as possible. You're precious to him, and he wants you to feel good about yourself.

This man's cooking can fix *ANYTHING* I swear. You're crying about something? He made you soup, and now it's all better. Your eyes might be puffy from crying and your nose might be runny, but you have nice warm tasty soup and a blanket, your man is right there with you, telling you that everything is going to be okay.

Did I mention that this man, given the chance, could write poetry about how much he loves you? Yeah, no, this is one of the circumstances that he will do so and read it to you. It's the most flamboyant for of positive affirmation out there, but it's a good one.

If making you feel better involves worshiping you like the lovely person you are, he'll do so without any hesitation. You can rest easy feeling that he has an answer to every problem you might have.

Doppo:

He listens to your admission about not liking that part of yourself with a very serious and stern face, and then he gets up, grabs his coat and tells you to get ready and to come with him, that you're both going somewhere.

You might think that it's somewhere quiet and sweet, but no, he takes you to a funhouse with those mirrors that make everything look warped. He makes you stand in front of all of them so you two can see how silly you look, but then he makes you stand in front of a normal mirror, kisses your cheek and tells you how beautiful you look.

He tries his best to make you feel better in the goofiest, most dad-like way of them all. It might work, it might not, but he's not going to stop doing it either. Give him the chance and he'll keep doing it until you see what he's trying to do, and that is to help you understand that no matter how you see yourself, he can always see you, and he wants you to know that you're perfect.

He offers support and solutions, choosing one won't exclude the other, it's dependent on what you want and what you need to feel better.

Natsue:

This woman is a MOTHER. You tell her you're not feeling good about your body and she's on top of it. She's immediately reassuring you that that's normal, that everyone, at some point in time, doesn't like how they look in the mirror, and that you're not alone in that.

She'll try and help you come to terms with what you don't like about yourself. If it's a smaller butt than before you lost weight, she'll try and help you figure out what about that you don't like so you can figure out (together, because she's not making you do this alone) what steps you feel you need to take to feel better.

This is the kind of woman to hold your hand and tell you that you're stunning and she genuinely means it, it's obvious in the way that she holds you and looks at you, all of it.

Lots of reassuring touches, like squeezing your shoulders or holding your hand, even rubbing your back. She is here for you, just like she's there for her boys, even if they don't need the same as you do.

Shibukawa:

He's going to teach you to laugh about it. You may think "but that's not gonna help-" Au contraire, my dear reader! Laughing about your insecurities can be very healthy, because instead of making it a source of pain and discomfort, he teaches you to associate looking at yourself with joy and laughter.

Laughter itself just makes people feel a heck of a lot better, and he knows that all too well. Sometimes all we can do is laugh at something. Does it immediately help? No, not really, but time is both gentle and cruel, and you have a lot of time left to change and grow.

He'll tell you about how he used to hate how much smaller he was getting with age, how much he hated his greying hair and loosening skin, but now? This is one of the most confident men you will ever meet, because while it may suck to change, it means that you're still alive, and that's pretty good, all things considered!

He'll hold your hand every time he sees you staring at yourself in the mirror looking upset, because while he's trying to teach you to laugh and love the changes you'll go through, he knows that sometimes it pays to have someone by your side during the process.

[rfxiii]

hiiiiiii i rlly love ur headcanons :3 sooo was wondering if i could get some general north yankton related ones abt the boys? ive had north yankton brainrot so bad lately LOL

tysm and no rush or pressure at all !! 🩷

aahh! Tysm for the request 💕 I’ve been so obsessed with the North Yankton era and those three soggy idiots recently so ty for letting me indulge in it!

Tw: mentions of drug use

[1099 words]

General North Yankton HCs:

Michael was a regular at the local diner- so much so that they knew him by name and started making his usual order the second they saw him parking and heading in.

Trevor and Brad used to dare each other to do increasingly stupid and dangerous shit. Several of these instances resulted in Trevor having to get a rabies shot. That being said, they totally weren’t the reason that Michael found a raccoon in his bathroom…twice.

Brad and Trevor absolutely made each other worse. Brad only ever smoked weed really before meeting Trevor. But Trevor introduced him to things like coke, meth, and heroin and got him hooked almost instantly. After Brad was just as doped up on the shit as Trevor was, they’d feed off each others bad ideas- taking more drugs to see what they could handle, getting black out wasted and going for races down the highway, robbing liquor stores and even houses just for the fun of it and leaving bodies in their wake with sloppy to no cover up of evidence. Separately they were both dangerous, but together they were literally hell on earth.

Despite the sarcasm and occasional bickering, Lester considered Michael something like his best friend. Lester keeps himself guarded and he’s very much out for just himself and his own self interest, but he and Michael are closer than he’s ever been with any other person, which makes Michael his closest friend by default even if he will argue it.

Michael was well aware that Amanda was into Brad. He’s unsure if they ever hooked up, but he knows she did want him. She found Brad attractive- tall, big, strong, and his crazy personality was fun. But she picked Michael for being stable, kinder, and a long term option (and for free tits). Michael still counted it as a win.

Trevor was invited, but didn’t come to Michael and Amanda’s wedding. Michael getting married crushed him, and he went totally off the radar for almost a month after- getting black out drunk, high, and slaughtering hitchhikers in an effort to feel anything but the pain of having his best friend “stolen” from him.

Physical fights weren’t uncommon between the trio- mostly between Michael and Brad. Occasionally, Trevor and Brad would argue over stupid shit and fight. Trevor and Michael fist fought the rarest, but nearly every time they did fight, Trevor would cry after. Not usually in front of the others, but after disappearing on his own, getting high, and convincing himself that this was the fight that was going to make Michael abandon him.

Trevor remembers the exact date and time that he and Michael met. He lovingly refers to it as their “anniversary”.

The phrasing secretly pissed off both Amanda and Brad. Michael acted like he hated it, but was actually sort of endeared by it.

Brad was the first one to suggest he and Trevor go off on their own. Trevor only agreed a few weeks later after truly looking for the fact that Michael was pulling away from him. Honestly, Brad felt toward Trevor the way that Trevor feels toward Michael. He was obsessive, possessive, and hated how attached to Michael that Trevor was instead of seeing that he was “the better option”. Trevor was his person and he hated sharing him with Michael.

Trevor was, surprisingly, the peacekeeper frequently between the group. Whenever Michael would get angry about the crazy shit Trevor and Brad would get up to, Trevor would nag at him and make jokes until, often, Michael would back down and let it go. Brad would often go out of his way to say or do things to make Michael angry- enter Trevor defusing the situation before it came to blows or a shoot out. He started his fair share of fights between everyone too though with his antics and loud mouth.

Michael would pick up strippers and sex workers frequently in each town they went to- mostly slightly younger women to feel like he was reliving his “glory days”. Trevor always seemed to pick up MILFS from every bar he stopped at- older ladies love him and he loves older women who dote on him. Brad always had two or three girlfriends in each city- occasionally they’d all find out about each other and gang up to slash his tires or kick his ass when he came back through town.

Trevor hated being alone and made any excuse to share rooms when at random motels or safe houses. There could be two open motel rooms with extra beds or they could be staying in a three bedroom safe house, but either Michael or Brad would, more often than not, wake up with Trevor in bed with them or asleep on the floor beside their bed.

Brad was born into the system, and lived his whole childhood in foster care until he aged out of the system and was left to figure it out on his own. He was used to living in homes with a max of ten other kids and became very possessive of things/people (Trevor) as he was convinced they’d get taken away. And he was not good at sharing or coexisting in a space with people he didn’t like (Michael).

That being said, Brad shared almost everything with Trevor: clothes, girls, food they’d order at a diner, beds, practically everything.

Michael secretly wished, more than anything, that Trevor would calm down and grow up. Trevor was his best friend, and he did want him in his life and to be a part of his kids' lives. But between the drugs, his crazy lifestyle, and his refusal to slow down, Michael knew it was too dangerous to keep things up how they were.

(You mentioned it, and I think I’ve heard it other places too so I guess it’s just like a collective headcanon?? Or maybe it’s canon?? I seriously don’t know?) But Michael was a little older than Trevor. Maybe by like two or three years. But then Brad was younger than Trevor by a year or two also- making him like four or five years younger than Michael. And giving Michael the excuse of “being older and smarter” in his arguments about why his decisions were correct.

Trevor secretly hoped for a time that one day Michael would come to him and admit how “wrong” he’d been for marrying Amanda and they would run off together and live life how they used to back in their twenties when they first met.

[modelbus]

CONGRATULATIONS ON 500 FOLLOWERS !!! WHOOP WHOOP ! You deserve it :DD

May I please request a MTommyinnit x M reader? (TOMMYINNIT; CHILDHOOD FRIENDS TO LOVERS; SOULMATES?)

Where Tommy distinctly remembers meeting a foreign Mreader as a child during one of his family's camping trip, but he can't really be too sure because he was so young and he doesn't have any pictures with said Mreader. Meanwhile, Mreader doesn't understand why he's so attached to the framed picture of him and a young blonde kid from a camping trip he went on years ago. Flashforward to now, they go back to the camping grounds from their childhood to maybe try to find each other again? Except when they arrive with their respective families, a goose literally attacks them (Tommy and Mreader) and chases them until they run into each other.

P.S yes the geese are soulmate geese who bother their person until they run into their soulmate lmao

PPS I love your works so much, I look forward to your updates all the time :')) Keep up the amazing work fr

THANK YOU SO MUCH! Also, I find soulmate geese so funny, definitely one of the best soulmate AU’s

Pairing: CC!Tommy x Male!Reader

Childhood Friends to Lovers - Soulmate AU

“Well, is it like you remembered?” Your mom asks, but you don’t respond.

You’re too busy looking around the campground, searching for a certain boy. The last time your family came here, years ago, you made an instant best friend with a boy named Tommy. Your mom must’ve taken a photo of you two because the framed photo has sat on your desk ever since.

But now you were here, ten years to the day, for another camping trip. You were absolutely determined to find this kid and figure out why kid you was so damn attached.

Obviously your plan had a few flaws. The biggest one? You have no fucking clue what he looks like. In the photo he was blond and tall, taller than you, but that was ten years ago. For all you know he could’ve dyed his hair and stopped growing!

“Why don’t you walk around? There’s a lake you could probably get some cool photos at for your friends or something.” Your mom suggests. She lowers her voice. “Your dad’s struggling with the tent, just give him a bit.”

You turn around to see the entire tent collapse on your dad. Anything is better than being roped into that mess, even trying to hunt down the mystery guy.

“Yeah, alright. Text me if you need me!” With that, you make your escape.

The campground is actually really full. It is prime vacation time though, so it makes sense. You aren't quite sure if that makes your job easier or harder. It meant a higher likelihood of the guy being here but made it harder to actually find him.

Somehow you instinctively make your way down near the water, where a few geese are scattered around. Cute, but you know they can and will bite you if you get any closer. Luckily you aren't seeing any goslings. You raise your phone, opening the camera app to take a photo. Who doesn't appreciate photos of geese?

Of course, the second your eyes are off the geese, one decides it fucking hates you. The goose charges at you, all fluffed up feathers and angry honking noises.

"Woah, hey!" You exclaim, backing away slowly.

It doesn't seem to be slowing down though, still advancing. You actually like not having to get a rabies shot--can geese get rabies? You don't want to find out--so you turn tail and run. Apparently that was also the wrong move, as it chases you.

There's just no winning with this stupid goose.

"I'm dead, I'm so fucking dead." You pant, racing through unfamiliar tents.

As you disrupt everyone's camping experience, they stop to stare at you. You must look like a madman, running from a goose like this. But they bite! And you have a will to live!

Risking a glance back, you stare at the goose. You'd think it looked almost majestic if it wasn't actively trying to kill you. Wings spread wide, it was showcasing its beauty. Unfortunately, it was still chasing you.

"Leave me alone, you fucker!" Someone shouts.

You turn your head away from the goose and to the noise, still running, only to crash into something. You barely see a flash of red before you land hard on your ass. The goose is definitely going to kill you.

"Oh God, I'm going to die to a fucking goose." You groan.

"My friends are never letting me live it down if I die to one of these fuckers."

Whipping your head around, you realize the thing you crashed into wasn't actually a "thing." It was a person. A blond boy was also sprawled out on the grass next to you, in a red shirt. He looks strangely familiar, but you don't really have time to think about that right now.

There're two geese now, both honking at you two. At least they seem to be getting some amusement out of your inevitable death.

"You were getting chased by one too?" The boy guesses.

"Yeah, thing just charged at me!"

"Me too!"

He grins at you, and for a second you forget about the geese. There was something so agonizingly familiar about that smile.

"I think they're not angry anymore?" He stands up, and you realize the geese stopped making noises. Now they're just staring at you two. If you didn't know better, you would've thought they seemed impatient.

He offers you a hand to help you up, and you take it.

"Now that we survived a goose attack together, I feel like we're practically best friends." You joke.

"Those who fight off savage geese together stay together, as I always say." He agrees, nodding. "I'm Tommy, by the way."

The name strikes something in you, and you suddenly realize why he seems so familiar. Blond hair, tall as fuck. You had completely forgotten the name Tommy, but hearing it now you remember. What were the chances a random goose actually chased you into meeting the kid you met ten years ago?

"Weird question, but you wouldn't have happened to come here ten years ago, would you?"

Tommy's face changes from amusement to shock, jaw dropping. The expression change tells you everything you need to know, the answer to your question.

"No fucking way." He gasps.

"Fucking way."

One of the geese lets out a honk, making you both jump and turn toward it. The geese waddle away, considerably calmer than when they were trying to attack you both.

"This is fucking crazy." Tommy laughs, running a hand through his hair.

"You're telling me! A goose chased me from the other side of the campground to here!" You exclaim. "It's like it knew what it was doing!"

"They were conspiring against us!"

You laugh at his words, and he almost seems to glow at it.

"Hey, could I get your number? So I don't have to go ten years wondering about you again." He asks, forming it into another joke.

"Of course." He hands you his phone, and you quickly put in your number and save your contact. "There. This time we can't disappear on each other."

"Hey! That was your fault!"

"How was it my fault?! You were the one who left!"

"You're the one who isn't English! Who the fuck isn't English?!"

As you joke with each other like no time has passed, something weird happens. It's like a piece of you has slotted into place, a piece you didn't even know was missing.

Weird.

[differenteagletragedy]

omg i’m the one who sent in the more poly hcs request and i’m living! i have so many thoughts i want to share (all good ones!) so sorry if this is monstrously long!

i love the idea that the Cat Distribution System just dumping all these cats onto baxter and everyone else is just 🤨 “are you stealing cats this can’t be a coincidence anymore”

also roadtrips! i never even thought of that and i love it! i like to believe my mc is most comfortable being a passenger princess (i.e she sits in the backseat and doesn’t help with directions or anything) despite being able to drive and having her license. she will obv help if needed, like in roadtrip in step 3. but it’s funny to imagine everyone else running around at a rest stop getting snacks, gas, etc. and a passenger princess mc is there, just stretching their legs and looking cute, honestly prob giving step 2 kyra vibes with some sunglasses and just serving.

and the wedding! so sweet! i do think it’s funny to imagine someone (prob derek, but maybe cove) being like “omg what if we hyphenate our last names” and then someone else going “sweetie, i love you, but that’s four last names and it’d be ridiculous. we aren’t doing that” so everyone just keeps their own last names for the sake of ease, assuming it’s poly in that way. although, i feel like if they were to take anyone’s last name, it would be mc’s, since they’re like the pin holding them together nicely.

also thanksgiving!! and holidays!!! omg i’m Obsessed! i just know someone’s going to go crazy and deck the house out with decorations for holiday! they’d be known as like That House on the block with the crazy awesome setups every year. on the thanksgiving front, they’d def host thanksgiving (prob cause they have the biggest house and most space). i think it’d be a decently sized gathering of like 12-14 people at first, including them, but as the years progress and they make more friends and people join their families, i can def see it growing to like 20+ people, easily.

okay i’m done! sorry that went on for like Ever! i just have so many thoughts about a poly relationship and i loved your hcs so much! skfjsjdjdk

Thank you for sending it in! I was initially nervous about it but it's been a blast to write about!

-- The Cat Distribution System HIGHLY favors Baxter. As he gets older he turns into a Cat Dad and I won't be convinced otherwise lolol.

Baxter: *comes home covered in scratches, holes in his suit, hair all messed up*

Everyone: ????

Baxter: Oh, my apologies for not explaining -- the neighbor came and said she had an issue with some feral cats that had made a home under her porch, I went to pay them a visit. They're not feral, it turns out, just a bit skittish!

Cove: *to Derek* Does he need a rabies shot?

Derek: He needs something.

-- I always love road trip stories! Your MC is so valid for being a passenger princess, like just let her sit pretty while the boys take care of everything. Lol Cove is coming out with bags of snacks, Derek asks for something healthy and Cove pauses then gives him some of Baxter's gummies.

Cove: *whispers* They're fruit gummies.

-- But LOLOL Cove would absolutely suggest hyphenated names, bless his heart, that's killing me lol. Baby no, shhh. He's like doodling "Cove Holden-Suarez-Ward-Last" in a notebook, he's so sweet.

-- I agree on the decorations! I put this in another list, but I think Baxter would try to keep things a little tasteful but Cove and Derek are like "Nope, we have A Vision" and it's just so much stuff.

[yoke9494]

(Actor) Tokyo Revengers/Reader crack. (The party before the zombie apocalypse started.)

Read pts 1-4 on Wattpad

Reads pts 1-4 on AO3

17+ (suggestive sexual themes/mature language)

I was on crack and sleep deprived when I wrote this. (Not really the crack part but I felt like it)

I made this photo, printed it out, and put it on a candle. 😂 Taiju's next....

Sanzu and Draken are in love but the reader is living her best life.. ♥️

You held back Sanzu's strands from falling into Ran's toilet. The loud music pulsed through the walls. But they were mainly drowned out by Sanzu's dry heaving.

You really didn't understand why this man decided to keep his hair long. He could have just worn a wig or hair extensions on set like Baji and Ran but he claimed the glue they used on the wigs made him itchy.

Drama queen much.

You held back your own vomit when Sanzu threw up the rest of the alcohol he consumed throughout the night. It was his fault for getting drunk on an empty stomach. Or was it yours since you sort of forced him to come?

"What did I eat that was purple? Y/n... Am I dying?"

You snorted. "No you're alright Zu. You had a grape slush that Draken tried to give to me. It was mainly vodka..You were buzzed already so that's how we ended up in Ran's bedroom."

"We aren't home?"

"Nope.."

"Ugh!"

You laughed at your poor boy who was groaning face down in the toilet. Over the long year of filming Akashi Haruchiyo had become your ride or die/roommate. He didn't get much screen time for season 1 but he was always around. Especially since he had a talent when it came to rigging up all the wires for the lights and sound.

He was the shyest out of all the cast members and usually kept to himself off set. One day you decided to strike up a conversation with him after one of your scenes together. It took time to break him out of his shell but it did him some good and he eventually opened up to everyone.

Plus he needed to get used to talking to everyone since he would have to channel some crazy psycho energy for when the next few seasons started filming.

"Why are you laughing at me Y/n? I saved your ass.. Fucker was just trying to get in your pants again."

You shook your head and clicked your tongue. He was always stingy when it came to you, he respected your whole 'No life but the hoe life' lifestyle, but that didn't mean he liked it..

"I would have let him without the drink. All he had to do was ask."

Sanzu scoffed.

"Disgusting. You know he slept with both Hina and Emma right? They were sure he was the one to give them something.. and there's a rumor he slept with Hanma too."

"You know I make everyone use protection right? Even you. What kind of hoe do you think I am?.... Plus, who hasn't slept with Hanma?"

Sanzu stood up and flushed the toilet before washing his face and hands. "I sure as hell haven't. I don't want to have to get a rabies shot or the clap.."

You snorted but before you could say a word, the devil himself must have heard you talking about him. Hanma barged into the bathroom and eyed the both of you.

"First of all...I don't have rabies! Second, You guys done fuckin in here or what? I need to take a shit!"

You and Sanzu both got pushed out before you could say a thing. Hanma grumbled something about being lactose intolerant and the devil coming out of his ass cheeks.

"There's like 6 bathrooms in this house!"

"And?! If you freaks want to watch then be my guest! I always wanted a blow job while I took a shit... Y/n you down?!"

....... Silence........

"Well fuck me then!"

----------

While Hanma was talking to himself you both returned down stairs. The house seemed to have gotten more crowded since you and Sanzu left to the bathroom.

The first thing you noticed was both Takemichi and Tetta standing on the coffee table. Tokyo by Dwin/Kid Kush played while Tetta tried to twerk with Takemichi. You felt the second hand embarrassed creep up on you.

You already knew Tetta Kisaki was a shit dancer but with Takemichi's dump trunk you figured he knew how to at least move it.

"I need another drink... I hope the twins can make me something strong enough to forget this nightmare.."

You agreed with Sanzu but before you could walk after him, a pair or arms snaked themselves around your waist. By the deep chuckle and smell of their cologne you could already tell who it was.

"Can I help you Keisuke?"

Baji nuzzled his face into the crook of your neck. He was a touchy drunk, usually Chifuyu or Mitsuya would keep an eye on him but when he got too cuddly they pushed him toward someone else.

Judging by the snicker coming from Chifuyu, he was the one to throw you under the bus this time.

"You feel so warm! And you smell so gooood! You wanna dance?! Show these armatures how the real ones do it."

Your eyes scanned the room to look for Sanzu. You spotted him with a drink in his hand standing by the back door. He motioned to you that he's stepping out for a quick smoke break.

You nodded your head towards the coat rack and gave him your 'listen to me' face.

Sanzu rolled his eyes and mouthed back "Okay, mom." and grabbed his coat.

It just started snowing outside when you both arrived that evening. The start of the winter season brought early snow and you didn't want him to catch a cold. You all only had a few weeks off before all the production meetings started up again.

"Y/nnn! Love me!"

Once Sanzu was out of sight you turned to Baji and dragged him towards Takemichi and Kisaki.

"Come on Edward. Let's show ThiccyMitchy how to pop his pussy right."

*Gag* "... I bet it smells like Doritos and fish sticks."

------------------

What happened?

Dancing around with Baji turned into you and Sanzu sneaking back up to Ran's room. You both saw his playstation before you left the first time a decided to later on raid his Minecraft world. It's all he talked about off set..

When you both stepped into the room you found Mikey and Draken already messing with it. Somehow that turned into you all playing and having to take a shot each time you died. Two if you got blown up by a creeper.

Poor Mikey was out like a light after a few shots and fell asleep on your lap... He got emotional when he drank and tried to constantly give creepers a hug because he thought they were just shy.

That was the last thing you remembered before the sun coming through Ran's purple curtains burned your eyelids.

A small shake was what brought you out of the darkness. When you squinted at the person, Rindou gave you a bored look.

"Y/n... Is my brother under the covers with you?"

You looked around and noticed you were indeed under the large blanket that once covered the older Haitani's bed.

You felt a lot of weight on you, also you noticed your pillow was breathing...

Looking back you  noticed you were laying on Sanzu's stomach while he laid horizontally at the head of the bed..

Under the covers was Draken cuddled up on you, clinging to your left side, Mikey was between your legs and his head was on your stomach, and you had no clue when, but Hanma was cuddled up on your right side drooling on your arm.

"The fuck? Uh... Sorry Rin, no Ran here."

Rindou clicked his tongue. "Did you see him at all last night? I turned away for 10 minutes and lost him. Haven't seen him since.."

You thought back to that evening. He was the one to greet you and Sanzu first but after that he was gone..

"Not since--"

Draken groaned. "He passed out so me and Kazutora had to put him in one of the rooms down the hall. The one with the fish tank.. Too many jello shots with Pah and Peh.. Now, Rindou shut up and quit moving Y/n. I was having a dream about our wedding day."

Draken rolled over and mumbled something about giving you 6 kids and a cat.

Rindou rolled his eyes and began to walk out.

"Wait Rin..."

You whisper yelled after him, he stopped to look at you.

"Hm?"

"... Help me get out of here. I have to pee."

You just wanted out of there since you were getting hungry. You knew where Ran hid the good snacks when he had a party.

Rindou huffed but walked back to the bed.

"... Okay... Wait. You all have on clothes right?"

You honestly had to do a double take on that one. Thankfully you all still did, the only weird thing was you noticed Hanma had two dark hair extensions stuck to the side of his head. They were obviously Baji's.

Speaking of ...

While Rin helped get Mikey off of you, a small thud made you both freeze. Baji had rolled off the edge, you didn't even see him under the blankets. He groaned from the floor before he started snoring again.

Rindou gave you the most judgemental look. "Ran's going to need a new bed.. I'm a little offended that I wasn't invited too Y/n. I thought you had a good time with me last weekend..." 

You wanted to laugh but just shook your head. " Nothing happened... I think?... I'm sure we all just passed out.--"

"Then... *Snort* why is Baji missing his pants?.. Fuck, he's a hairy motherfucker.."

You looked down and snorted. Baji's butt cheeks were full on display for you and Rindou.

"Oh... Uh, God damn that's a jungle..."

You both started laughing. It only woke up Sanzu and Baji while the rest told you both to shut up with their grumpy voices.

Sanzu looked around and made a face at all the dudes laying below him. He relaxed when you and Rindou waved at him when his eyes landed on you.

Baji got up and yawned before scratching his stomach while you and Rindou tried to keep your eyes off his thang-a-ling.

"Morning guys..." He looked back at the bed and chuckled. "Sanzu, why are you all pink?"

Sanzu covered his eyes and shook his head. "Why's your hairy ass dick out Baji! Y/n's in here with us!"

Baji shrugged before he turned to you and Rindou. He laughed because you both were staring at something interesting on the floor.

Why were you being shy all of a sudden? He noticed you were struggling to keep your eyes above his waist. You bit your lip and looked up at the ceiling just to avoid it. 

Smirking he looked around the room for his boxers. They were laying on the lamp that was on Ran's dresser.

"Not like she hasn't seen it before. Made her shake like she was having a seizure last time. I still have the scratch marks on my back to prove it.."

You looked up while Baji winked at you.

"Ain't that right babe?"

Before you could say anything Mikey must have woken up from all the noise. He threw a pillow at Baji.

"All of you shut up! Baji put that damn thing away before it bites someone! You and your fucking 80's porn star bush. Manscape that shit.."

Baji snorted. "It's not even that bad! You're all just made you have baby pubes. And you all know I like to sleep naked. We've woken up like this before." He clicked his tongue when everyone groaned.

"Whatever I have to pee anyways." 

Sanzu had gotten off the bed and stood next to you. He and Rindou shared a "good morning" before the younger  left to go find his older brother.

While you looked for your shoes your stomach started growling. It was so loud that it nearly woke everyone up again.

Sanzu turned to you and chuckled. "Wanna go out and eat? I think there's a diner or something near by. We'll call an Uber after so we don't have to walk the rest of the way home?"

You nodded while he took your hand. As long as no one saw you two leaving he'd be able to spend the day with you uninterrupted.

A few bodies laid throughout  the Haitani's house. You noticed Takemichi was still here, along with Kisaki, Kazutora, Mitsuya, Chifuyu, Pah, Emma and Hina. Everyone else seemed to have gone home at some point, safely you hoped..

---------------

Sanzu was right and there was a small diner nearby. It was only a 10 minute walk and you couldn't wait to eat then go home and take a shower. You smelled like sweaty men and tequila.

Settling on a greasy breakfast to help your small hangover, Sanzu did the same but he was mainly focused on his pancakes and drowned them in syrup.

It was quiet for a few minutes until he spoke up. "I wanted to ask if... If you wanna hang out today? See a movie or something?"

You looked up and just nodded since your mouth was full. He waited for you to finish chewing.

"Sure! I don't have anything to do today anyways. What do you want to go see?"

Before he could say anything a few police sirens interrupted him. 3 police cars raced by, followed by a few EMT vehicles.

The diner was quiet while the customers watched the scene from the large windows.

Someone hummed beside you and Sanzu, the waitress had startled the both of you.

The older woman placed down a new cup of orange juice for you before she started refilling Sanzu's coffee cup.

"Sorry sweethearts, I didn't mean to scare you.--"

A firetruck flew by with 3 more cop cars following it. The woman looked up and fixed her heavy framed  glasses. She furrowed her brows and frowned while she looked out the window.

"Oh no. That can't be good..."

...................

[moorheadthanyoucanhandle]

GONE FISSION

Opening in theaters this weekend:

Oppenheimer--This biopic splits time the way its hero splits the atom. Narrative is fissionable to writer-director Christopher Nolan; he skips back and forth between episodes of Oppenheimer (Cillian Murphy) as a bumbling student, then as a philandering rising star in the new field of quantum physics, then as the determined yet haunted lord of Los Alamos, then as a post-bomb martyr to '50s era red-baiting. It glides along smoothly through its fractured scheme, beautifully shot by Hoyt van Hoytema in black and white and varyingly muted shades of color depending on period and point of view, and pushed along by a solemn Philip Glass-esque score by Ludwig Göransson.

Often crowned by a horizontal wide-brimmed preacher-style hat that makes him look like Brad Dourif in Wise Blood, Murphy uncannily captures the bursting, wide-eyed, near-ecstatic face that we see in photos of Oppenheimer. But he manages to give the performance a human dimension, with everyday foibles and touches of humor. He's not a pageant figure.

Murphy carries a star presence. But he's very ably supported by a huge, colorful gallery of star character players: Robert Downey Jr. as AEC Chairmen Lewis Strauss and Josh Hartnett as Ernest Lawrence and Benny Safdie as Edward Teller and Tom Conti as Albert Einstein and David Krumholtz as Isidore Rabi, Oppenheimer's menschy colleague who makes sure he eats and nudges his conscience, and Matthew Modine and Casey Affleck and Kenneth Branagh and Rami Malek and Alden Ehrenreich, to name only a few.

They're all entertaining, but two in particular jolt the movie to life: Florence Pugh as Oppenheimer's joyless lover Jean Tatlock and Matt Damon as the practical-minded, professionally unimpressed Leslie Groves, representing us laypeople in his deadpan, flummoxed scenes with Murphy. For a while it seems like Emily Blunt is underserved as Kitty Oppenheimer, but near the end she gets a juicy, angry scene opposite AEC lawyer Roger Robb (Jason Clarke), who has underestimated her.

Other than maybe a few too many scenes of the young "Oppie" having visions that look like the psychedelic mindtrip at the end of 2001, there was no point where I found Oppenheimer less than absorbing. Few would suggest that this ambitious, superbly acted, superbly crafted film isn't a major, compelling work, a vast expansion on Roland Joffé's watchable but modest Fat Man and Little Boy from 1989. If Nolan's film isn't quite completely satisfying, there could be two reasons.

One is that trying to arrive at a moral conclusion about this movie's hero seems impossible. Put (too) simply: on the one hand, Oppenheimer won World War II for the good guys and checked fascism (not checkmated it, alas) for more than half a century. On the other hand, his invention has the potential to ruin the world for everybody. Both can be true, and the ambiguity is unresolvable.

Another problem with the film, however, is a matter of simple showmanship. Back in 1994, James Cameron brought his silly action picture True Lies to a point where Arnold Schwarzenegger and Jamie Lee Curtis kiss while, far in the distance, we see a mushroom cloud erupt on the horizon. Triumphant, but then Cameron pushed his luck, piling on one last struggle with the villain in a Harrier jet. I remember thinking (and writing) at the time that when your hero and heroine kiss in front of a mushroom cloud, the movie is over.

Oppenheimer, obviously a very different movie, is uneasily structured in the same way. The scenes leading up to the Trinity Test at White Sands in 1945 are riveting, pulse pounding. The explosion and the immediate aftermath, ending the war in Japan, is a stunning dramatic climax.

But then the movie keeps going, for another hour or so, detailing the war of spite and will between Strauss and Oppenheimer, and the revocation of Oppenheimer's security clearance. It's interesting, provocative material in itself, but it seems a little petty and trivial after the "I am become death; destroyer of worlds" stuff. Given Nolan's supposed consummate skill at scrambling sequence, couldn't he have somehow structured the movie to end with a bang and not a whimper?

Barbie--Something is rotten in the state of Barbieland. As this, her first live-action feature begins, our titular heroine finds herself haunted, right in the middle of raging dance parties at her Dreamhouse, by thoughts of death. Still more alarming, when she steps out of her pumps, her feet go flat to the ground.

To be clear, the Barbie in question, played by Margot Robbie, is "Stereotypical Barbie," the blond, inhumanly thin and leggy iconic version of the Mattel doll. She shares the relentlessly cheery pink-plastic realm of Barbieland with countless other Barbies of every race and body shape and profession, all happy and accomplished and untroubled and mutually supportive. They're dimly aware of us in the "Real World"; they believe that their own harmony has created an example that has led to female empowerment and civil rights over here.

The Barbies also share Barbieland with Ken (Ryan Gosling) and countless variant Kens, as well as Ken's featureless friend Allan (a perfectly cast Michael Cera). But the guys exist entirely as accessories to the relatively uninterested Barbies. Ken's unrequited fascination with Barbie makes him subject, unlike the Barbies, to dissatisfaction.

Barbie goes for advice to "Weird Barbie" (Kate McKinnon), whose hair is frizzy and patchy and who's stuck in a permanent split. She's told that her troubles come from the dark feelings of somebody who's playing with her in our reality, so she sets out on a quest to the Real World, emerging in Venice Beach. Barbie connects with a mom and teenage daughter (America Ferrera and Ariana Greenblatt) whose relationship is strained; she's also pursued by the all-male board of Mattel, led by Will Ferrell. Ken, meanwhile, learns about our patriarchy, likes what he hears, and heads back to Barbieland alone to institute it, with himself at the top.

Mattel was founded in 1945, the same year as the Trinity Test, and there are probably feminist social critics who would argue that Barbie, invented in 1959 by Mattel co-founder Ruth Handler (well played by Rhea Perlman in the film), has wreaked only a little less havoc on the modern psyche than Oppenheimer's gadget. Even though I'm in exactly the right generational wheelhouse (I was born in 1962), my own childhood experience with Barbie was very limited, and thus so were my nostalgic associations with her.

Even so, this nutty fantasy, directed by Greta Gerwig from a brilliant script she wrote with Noah Baumbach, made me laugh from its inspired first scene to its Wings of Desire finish. Narrated in the droll, arch tones of Helen Mirren, it manages to come across as both an ingenious pop-culture lampoon/celebration and an unpretentious but surprisingly heartfelt deep dive into the implications of the Barbie archetype. I wasn't a big fan of Gerwig's 2019 version of Little Women, but here she builds her world with the freedom of, well, a kid playing with dolls, but also with the confidence and adult perspective of an artist.

Not everything in the movie works; in the second half the narrative gets a little lost at times in some very strange musical numbers/battle scenes, and the whole thing comes close to going on a bit too long. And it's hard to say just who this movie is for. It hardly seems intended for little girls; however smart, they're too young for the commentary about female identity to mean much to them yet. It seems more like it's meant for adult women with both a fondness for and an ambivalence toward Barbie.

No doubt there are those who would also complain that, however witty and self-effacing, the movie amounts to a feature-length commercial for the brand. But in the age of Marvel and other such franchises, it seems a little late to object to this.

The revelation in the film is Margot Robbie. It seems ridiculous that she's able, in the role of freaking Barbie, to give a performance of such subtlety and nuance and shading and quiet, unforced wistfulness, but she does. And she gets to deliver the best last line of the year.

Theater Camp--Joan, the founder of "AndirondACTS," a slightly gone-to-seed theater camp in upstate New York, has fallen into a coma. The job of keeping the struggling camp afloat falls to her decidedly non-theatrical "crypto bro" son Troy. Meanwhile the devoted instructors work with the exuberantly happy campers to mount the shows, including an original musical about the life of poor comatose Joan (Amy Sedaris). Needless to say, all does not go smoothly.

The creators of this Waiting for Guffman-esque "mockumentary" comedy, Molly Gordon, Nick Lieberman, Ben Platt and Noah Galvin, know the world they're depicting well; all of them have been doing theater since they were small children. Gordon and Lieberman co-directed, from a script by all four; Platt and Gordon play Amos and Rebecca-Diane, the utterly enmeshed, co-dependent acting instructors and Galvin plays the low-profile tech director.

They capture the camaraderie and the sense of belonging that theater can give kids, and their affection for that world is unmistakable, but they're careful not to get too sentimental. The envies and resentments and passive-aggressive denigrations among theater folk, especially at this often professionally frustrated level, are vividly represented.

Getting laughs from the self-important vanities of theater people is pretty low-hanging fruit, I suppose, but Theater Camp is nonetheless often hilarious. The film also manages to get a little deeper at times, touching on the irony that while theater can create a haven and a community for misfit kids, this can generate its own clannishness and exclusionary snobbery, as in Amos and Rebecca-Diane's coldness toward the imbecilic but well-intentioned Troy, charmingly played by a sort of poor-man's Channing Tatum named Jimmy Tatro.

The real joy in Theater Camp, of course, is the acting: Platt, Gordon, Tatro, plus a few vets like Sedaris, Caroline Aaron and David Rasche bring the material to life. But as Glenn, the long-suffering backstage drudge who really ought to be onstage, Noah Galvin, who replaced Platt on Broadway in Dear Evan Hansen, is the revelation among the adults in the cast. He's a knockout.

The revelation among the kids playing the campers is, well, pretty much all of the kids playing the campers. There are some real singing, dancing and acting prodigies in this company. If there was a real theater camp somewhere with this kind of talent, their shows would sell out.

[invisibleraven]

doing geocaching for Willie/Alex/Reggie please and thank you

"I'm booooooored," Reggie whined one Saturday.

"There's lots to do," Alex commented from behind the newspaper he was struggling to read. In truth, he was a little bored too, but he didn't want to give Reggie the satisfaction.

"How about I look for something that we can do together?" Willie offered. He browsed through his phone, humming as he looked at some options. "Paintball?"

"Alex gets too competitive and I bruise too easy," Reggie replied.

"Pottery?"

"We got banned after you wouldn't stop re-enacting Ghost," Alex quipped wryly, and Willie looked a little sheepish.

"Geocaching?"

"What's that?" Reggie asked, perking up.

"it's like a GPS treasure hunt," Willie replied. "You get the coordinates and see if you can find the cache left there, and then you can leave another one in it's place or clues to a new one."

"That sounds so cool!" Reggie exclaimed. "I always wanted to go on a treasure hunt!"

"Sounds better than sitting around here," Alex admitted. "Are there any close?"

"One up in the hills-a bit of a hike, but it shouldn't be too bad," Willie said.

They agreed to go for it, packing up their bags, some snacks, and took off in the car towards the trail where the cache was supposed to be. '

Alex was in charge of the GPS, Willie in charge of the map, and Reggie the compass. The trail was one they'd done before, and it was a pleasant one. It was a nice day besides, and even Alex could admit that this was a good idea.

"I think we're close," he said, checking the GPS. "A few more degrees north."

"That way," Reggie said, pointing towards an offshoot of the path.

They stepped cautiously over roots, and stopped when Willie gleefully spotted a squirrel, though Alex held him back from trying to catch it. "No rabies please."

Finally they stumbled over a small lockbox, and popped it open. Inside was a small collection of cool keychains, bobbles, and a few coins that none of them recognized.

"Coooool!" Reggie said, then put down his pack, pulling out a trio of pirate hats.

"Why am I not surprised?" Alex grumbled.

"Shut up and smile for the photo hot dog," Willie said grinning wide.

"Alright, say Arrrr!" Reggie said, snapping a few shots of them with the cache with his phone, and even Alex could get into the spirit-for Reggie anyways, even if he put the hat back once the photos were done while Reggie and WIllie kept theirs on.

"Sp can we take any of it?" he asked.

"Only if we're gonna leave something in it's place," Willie replied. He pulled out a keychain from the Hollywood Ghost Club and exchanged it for a Pocahontas one featuring Meeko, because he loved raccoons.

Reggie chose a fidget cube for the sparkly sticker pack he had brought.

Alex looked through the treasures, and found a cool little booklet on a tourist attraction in Oregon that looked like a fun place to visit the next time they had vacation time. He looked through his fanny pack and tossed in a pack of fun bandages that he had in there, just in case.

"Alright me hearties, let's heave ho back home!" Willie exclaimed.

"You don't wanna see if we can find another one?" Reggie asked.

They both turned to Alex. He took in their eager faces and sighed. "Let's go, see what other booty we can plunder."

Willie snickered but Reggie whooped with glee and so they headed back out of the woods. They found another cache before heading home, though left it alone once they got their shot, since there was little in it of interest.

"Less bored now?" Alex asked Reggie.

"Yeah, kinda hungry and tired now though," he admitted.

"Pizza and a nap?" Willie suggested.

"Then can we watch Pirates of the Caribbean and drool over Orlando Bloom together?" Reggie asked.

"Totally," Alex agreed.

"Yo ho," Reggie said around a yawn, snuggling into Willie's side as Alex steered them home.

[spaghettificationandpretzels]

A Taste of Heaven Part 7

Series Masterlist

Part 6

Contains: Fluff, hurt/comfort, medical cannabis use, smut (oral sex M and F receiving, fingering, P in V)

2,340 words

Comment if you want to be tagged or follow #a taste of heaven.

After years of study and effort, you finally secure your dream job, as one of the head curators at the best museum in New York. After inheriting a huge brownstone you're looking for a roommate when your best friend Ubbe comes up with a suggestion, his younger brother Hvitserk. Better yet, you're a food historian and he's a three Michelin star chef.

"What did Harold say?" Hvitserk put the coffee down on the table in front of you, "even if the radio host won't pay, now that he's confessed, we can take it from the proceeds of his show. We've all decided that Bob should also get a pension if his hands don't improve, which will also come from the host and the actual participants, some of them are very wealthy."

Hvitserk nodded, "when do the court proceedings start?" You shrugged, "not for ages, they need to handle the criminal case first, but it looks like they're all going to plead out."

Things had been strange over the last few days, with each good update, he didn't seem even a little surprised. He would smile softly and press a kiss on your cheek. You knew something was going on, but there's was no point in worrying about it, Ubbe would have said something if there was a reason to be concerned.

"We've got to take the kitties in for their first shots tomorrow, then we need to help Ubbe set up his house for his little one." Hvitserk shook his head, "who knew a few days with our guys would turn him into a foster mother." You smiled, "your brother has always been a little too soft, all it takes is one sad story for him to be invested."

"I know, I'm taking a half-day in case they need extra cuddles. I know when dad got the dogs their rabies shots, they felt pretty shit for a couple of days." You nodded, "that's not uncommon with the rabies vaccine. I know we're not letting them outside but I think we should get the heartworm shot rather than back of the neck."

He nodded, "good idea, is there anything else we should ask the vet about?" You shook your head, "they're too small for spay and neuter, I'll ask the vet the soonest possible date and set up the appointment tomorrow."

"Great, I'll see you tonight. Love you."

"Love you too."

There was a buzz in the office when you arrived, it had been there since the day the host turned himself in. The cleaning was done with a purpose instead of just a sad drudge, whispers were passed back and forth about who would come out next. Mary had made a bet with Carl that the politicians who advertised on the show would here glad handing to save face.

Sure enough, the interim guard stood and waved his metal detector wand while a man in a crisp suit and red tie walked into the bearly clean space. He walked up to you with the stride of a man who had never had the smug punched off his face.

"Hello Dr l/n I'm sure you know who I am." You didn't take his extended hand, "yes I do, Mr Hicks is one of your biggest doners. Are you here to win votes? Because if so, you're in the wrong place and you can bet when your campaign comes around I will be bringing this up with everyone who will listen."

His face changed, "Mr Hicks…" You cut him off, "Mr Hicks and his lies are the reason one of my good friends will have to go through months of painful medical care. I'm not some rich socialite, sir, you can't bullshit me. I don't want your cash or your promises of doing better. Leave, before I get you thrown out."

He shook his head, "I leave my check with your bosses and come back when you're less hysterical, I'm sure you'll be more reasonable once this mess is gone." You wanted to punch him but you refrained, "I'd be careful sir, Mr Hicks is singing like a canary, if I was you, I'd be worried about what skeletons he's going to let out of the closet to save his own skin."

He went red, "Mr Hicks is a smart man, he's knows when to stay quiet." You nodded, "let's hope, I imagine there are a lot of powerful people who want him to keep his mouth shut."

You raced off the called the brothers, the group call took a little while to connect but everyone was there listening, "you won't believe what just happened. You know that hardline Republican senator who's always going on cutting public spending?" There was a rush of yeses, "he just came here hoping to smooth things over with us. That's not the best part, he basically threatened Hicks when I said that he was ratting on people."

You could hear Ivar laughing, "are you starting a pool for how long this guy lasts before his powerful friends take him out?" The burst of giggles was cut off by Lagertha, chastising him, "Ivar, you know that's not appropriate. At least over the phone when other people can hear."

"Sorry mum." You shook your head, "you guys are terrible. I need to get back to work." The warm goodbyes were met with being invited to dinner that weekend and you hung up.

****************

The rest of the day went by quickly, most of the cleaning had been done by now and the department was almost ready for tours. By the time you were ready to head home, things looked practically normal.

Hvitserk was still at work when you got home, Ubbe had come by to drop the kittens off, having asked to look after them again today. You were in the laundry brushing Lady Soot when Ivar showed up.

"Hello sweetie. What brings you here today?" You pulled him into a hug and invited him inside, "hey y/n." He sat down and took his braces off, moaning and rubbing his legs, "I was at work, my legs won't stop aching. I figured you understand." You nodded, "I can give you some of my weed if you like? I take it for the migraines so I don't know if it will help but it's worth a try."

He nodded, "anything." You ran off and returned with a cookie, "we like our lungs in this house." He laughed and scoffed it down, "it should take about an hour and a half to work. I'll get you a heat pack in the meantime." He smiled softly when you came back and laid it over his legs.

"How's work been?" He shrugged, "busy, Bjorn's still trying to get the big security contract but they're playing hard to get. They want us armed to the teeth but they're not willing to pay for us the train their old guys or hire our guys." You shook your head, "why is he wasting his time? The security contracting part of the business is super high-end, why waste time and money on someone who wants a cheap job?"

He shifted again, trying to get comfortable, "I'll rub your legs, you explain why your brother wants to torture himself." You gently rubbed the ache away while he continued, "he hired us first to help with trading. He wanted to move fresh produce from the east to west coast without the carbon footprint but it took off and now he wants protection for his warehouse."

"Fuck that, he's made millions off of you guys, he needs to be grateful and listen to you and your brother or he needs to fuck off." Ivar laughed, "that's what mother said but you know Bjorn, he gets his mind set on something and he won't let it go."

Ivar kept venting to you as the medication kicked in, after a while he started to get sleepy so you covered him up and closed the blinds in the lounge room before calling Hvitserk to tell him to come in the backway.

"Hello my love." Hvitserk pulled you into a kiss, his hand coming to stroke your cheek, "how long's he been out?" You rested your head on his chest, "an hour, I think we should let him spend the night here so I can look after him if his legs act up again. We can wake him up for dinner at seven." Hivtserk nodded, "good idea, I'll make his favourite."

An hour later, you were walking up to Ivar's sleeping form and patting his cheek, "hey, it's time for dinner." He opened his eyes slowly, "I'm not hungry." You shook your head and helped him sit up, "Hvitserk make your favourite, you need to eat something even if it's just a bite."

You helped him put his braces back on and walked him to the dining table, "how are you feeling?" He shrugged, "much better just foggy." Hvitserk was smiling, "what are you smiling about?" He shook his head, "nothing, I just got lucky when you chose me."

Ivar chuckled, "you guys are really cute." You threw a bread roll at him, "you're one to talk, bringing flowers to Miss Hanah on your way to work." He blushed, Miss Hanah worked at the preschool next to one of Ragnar's buildings that Ivar did IT in and Ivar was utterly smitten.

"She's nice to me." Hvitserk laughed, "she's more than nice to you Ivar, you know mother saw you and her kissing in the cafe." Ivar put his spoon down, "we all know dude, Hvitserk couldn't want to tell me." Ivar started to laugh, "you guys are killing me."

"I've set up the spare room for you, I don't want you driving home in this weather while you're in pain." Ivar tilted his head, "what weather?" You raised your eyebrows, "it's going to pour in like half an hour, don't you pay attention to the sky."

Sure enough, forty minutes later the heavens opened and it was bucketing down. You all sat and watched some TV for a while before Ivar headed to sleep in the spare room and you and Hvitserk went to yours.

You were laying in bed with your back to Hvitserk's chest while he told you about his day, his hands rubbing the stiffness out of your shoulders. He leaned in to pressed kisses on your neck, his hands moving to stroke your skin.

"Can I suck your dick?" His breath caught in his throat, "fucking hell yes." You spun around and sat on his lap, holding his chin in your hand while you kissed his lips. He pulled his T-shirt over his head and you ran a hand down his chest, your lips following the path of your fingers while you moved down his body.

When you got down to the waistband of his pants, he practically pulled them off, you took his half-hard cock out of his pants and stroked it until it swelled against his stomach before placing kitten licks on the head.

"That feels really nice." His tone was breathy as you pulled him into you mouth. His hips started moving slowly, pausing each time to let you adjust as you went deeper, "just like that, oh fuck." You sucked him deeper, using your hand for the parts your mouth couldn't take in while the other rolled his balls.

"Can I cum in your mouth?" You pulled off and took over with your hand, "sure." You put your mouth back on his dick and went back to work, Hvitserk tapping your cheek soon after to let you know he was ready. You squeezed his hand in consent and seconds later, he was cumming down your throat.

He pulled you up, pressing an opened mouth kiss to you before flipping you over and kissing down your body, "your turn." Hvitserk pulled your top off then sucked a nipple into his mouth while his hand rubbed the other one softly, swapping over when you gasped and grabbed his head.

You pushed your panties off as he made his way down your body and lifted your legs onto his shoulder when he kissed over your mound, settling down comfortably into the pillows. He used one hand to hold you open and sucked your clit into his mouth, moaning as your taste filled his mouth, "you taste like sour candy." You giggle was cut off by a moan as he slid two of his long fingers inside you.

"Hvitserk, please." He lifted his head for a moment, "I know, I'm here. Just let me make you feel good." He didn't stop until your legs were quivering around his head and you were pushing him away from the overstimulation. He kissed up your body and rested his weight on you, his hard cock laying against your stomach.

"Do you want to keep going?" You nodded, "yes please." He shifted onto his elbows and used one hand to line up with your entrance, with one last nod for you, he slid inside your body. "Oh God."

He chuckled, "Hvitserk is fine." You huffed a laugh through a moan and he sped up slowly, ending in his hips slamming into yours while you bucked to match his speed. He felt you contract around him, his hand coming to rub your clit while he kissed you like you had the last breath of air in your lungs.

"Give me one more." You were powerless to resist, clenching around him. His pace faltered and he half fell on top of you. He grunted and you felt him pulse inside you, "holy shit, that was something."

You giggled, "I know right." Hvitserk smiled and rubbed his nose with yours, "you stay there, I'll clean us up." He got up and came back a few seconds later with a warm cloth and wiped you down.

"You good, not sore or anything?" You shook your head and opened your arms, "I'm great." He smiled and climbed on top of you, resting his head on your chest. "You good?" He nodded through a yawn.

"Ok then, good night my love."

"Good night y/n."

Part 8

[mawofthemagnetar]

“Are we all ready? Is everything good? Impulse, are you good?” The Director fluttered around nervously, their buglike eyes gleaming under the studio lighting.

Impulse chuckled, a deep rumbling that rattled the floorboards. He sat up from the splintered ruins of the chair he’d been using, and stood to his full height.

In his demon form, his seven horns scraped the ceiling, leaving gouges in the oak beams overhead. He towered over everyone else on the set, taking a step forward that shook the ground.

Impulse reached down and scooped up a giant red tie, throwing it over his neck and doing it up with a practiced motion. The breeze from the flapping fabric damn near knocked the tiny fae director out of the air, and Impulse pulled it through to complete the knot a second later.

“Yeah, I’m good.” He said, swallowing a glob of utterly toxic spit. If it had hit the ground, falling out of his messy maw of spiked teeth, everyone in the room would have gotten very, very sick.

“Excellent. Places, please! Everyone get into position!” The Director shouted, far louder than his small size would suggest.

Impulse shuffled his wings uncomfortably. He had four of them, poking through his neatly-tailored suit coat. The suit was just as massive as he was, covering up his coal-black scales and wrapping smartly around all fourteen of his arms.

He lolloped over to the desk in the middle of the plain white set, setting his four tails down on the floor behind it. There wasn’t a chair- more of a jumbo size steel stool. Then again, a regular chair would have posed issues what with the tails and all, so.

“Okay, are we ready? Places! Places! Impulse, are you good?”

Impulse scooped up the sheaf of papers on his desk. They, too, were scaled up- just like everything else on the studio set.

He glanced over his notes, and gave the director a thumbs-up with one of his many arms.

“Alright. And…ACTION!”

Impulse smiled down the camera lens, letting all fourteen of his blank yellow eyes fix on it.

“Hello, everyone! It’s me, your friendly neighborhood Plague Lord, back again with another public health PSA from our friends at Mojang.”

Impulse grinned and shuffled his papers again, more for effect than anything else.

“This month, we’re encouraging all at-risk players to head on down to the Hub Core Clinic and make sure they’re up to date on their rabies shot! What’s rabies, you might be asking yourself?”

Impulse grinned, revealing hundreds of hypodermic teeth arranged at all angles in his massive mouth. Yellow spit, laced with disease, started to drip from his gums, and he chuckled.

“Rabies is a disease unique to mammals. There’s no cure, and once symptoms present, the victim is effectively dead. I love it. One of the classics! If you get it, you can expect a period of soreness and flulike symptoms…followed by tremors, delirium, hallucinations, acute fear of water, coma, and death. If your dog gets it, you can expect foaming at the mouth, possible delusions, rabid behaviour, and THEN coma and death. Bats can carry it, too! Great, right? I think so. But you might not.”

Impulse leaned back in his chair.

“So, Plague Lord, you may be saying. I don’t want to get that. Am I at risk? Well, here’s a simple test: are you warm blooded and have you had or do you have nipples and a belly button? Does any member of your family have those features? If the answer is yes, you might be in an at-risk group! Make sure you get yourself down to the Core Clinic for a consult with one of our trained staff. There’s no waiting and it’s completely free.”

Impulse leaned forward in his chair, placing every one of his clawed hands on the desk. The wood creaked, and he spread his wings wide.

Hundreds of yellow pustules boiled up across his body, a bio hazardous ooze starting to seep out of some of them. He lleered at the camera.

“Or don’t. Go on, friends. Make my day.”

“CUT!” The director shouted, “Impulse, that was perfect. Spot on! I think that’s the take.”

“You want to do a few more?” Impulse offered, “I got time.”

“Yeah, just to be safe, I think we will. Alright, places, everyone! Take two!”

[yikesharringrove]

Last episode!!

Okay! This episode had lots of ups and downs. LOTS of joe and downs.

The Steve/Nancy bullshit can literally eat shit I hate it I HATE IT

Once again the tension is constantly being ramped up, especially with the Russian team and the upside down team.

I didn’t even notice the California team wasn’t in this ep bc that’s how little I care.

There are a bunch of scenes I’ve seen as gifs that I didn’t see? Are those from teasers? Like Eddie playing his guitar in the UD?? I assume that’s to help Nancy out but I have NO idea.

Anyway this one had some good moments of return to what st used to be especially with Lucas and Dustin, but the last 20-30 minutes of pure exposition and flashbacks really sucked the life out of me. Not too sure how I feel about this ep overall

Incoherent thots:

The way Steve is literally being EATEN ALIVE by those things jesus christ. We joke abt him getting fucked up every season but this is by far the worst one. He’s alone! And so scared! And he doesn’t know his friends are coming!

That pov shot got me fucked up

Eddie yelling “kill it” while Nancy and Robin do all the work. I wanna be him when I grow up

NOT STEVE BITING THAT THING he so has rabies now.

Okay but the way he flung it against the ground by the tail 👀👀👀 okay. Aight.

Bro he TORE IT IN HALF

Me watching this scene five times:

“Well they took about a pound of flesh, but other than that. Yeah never better” love how ducked up he sounds. Also Eddie in background like jEsUs H cHrIsT

ROBIN WITH THE RABIES lmao were the same

Ooop all of them getting behind Steve

These bitches are like the Procompsognathus in Jurassic park

Oh shit that’s a little person barbecue these fuckers are CRAZY

“Promise me you won’t kill her” OBVIOUSLY this guy doesn’t give a fuck about you OR el

Do you think brenner makes the other people at the lab call him papa?

SAM OWENS FINALLY ADMITTING THAT EL IS A FRIGHTENED, TRAUMATIZED, LITTLE GIRL

I just fucking can’t with brenner he’s literally disgusting and I wish he was GONE

“This place is not a prison” THEN WHY DO YOU KEEP SEDATING HER WHEN SHE TRIES TO LEAVE

“You chose to trust me once” when? That time you kidnapped her from her mother and then tortured her mother so viscously that she was left permanently disabled? Is that when el chose to trust you?

I keep seeing in tiktok people who think number 1 is hot and bro. He’s so awful looking to me I can’t believe it

Dustin being an awful fucking liar are you kidding

“That psycho fREAK killer? Uh, no.” Dustin for president

Ted Wheeler coming in clutch suggesting the kids that ARENT HIS go to jail lmao Mrs. Sinclair looked like he was talkin out of his ass

I happen to think that Eddie’s hair should be getting bigger and more frizzy each time he’s shown. That lake water does not help with the frizz

STEVE

“I’m fine. I’m fine” DUDE YOU ARE MISSING CHUBKS OF YOUR SIDES

Robin rattling off the symptoms of rabies I love her. She really thinks her best friend is dying she’s freaking out amazing

Nancy ripping up her skirt to bandage him welcome to Rocky horror

What’s with the squelching sounds when she wrapped it around him?? Bro ew

Please know that when Steve and Nancy looked all lovey dovey at each other I booed super loud I HATE IT HERE

“Yeah you almost shot me with that one” “you almost deserved it” rip to season 1 Steve who definitely pissed himself when Nancy put that gun in his face

EDDIE STOP “fer yer modesty, dude”

Okay did everyone need to spoon up when that earthquake happened???? I fucking hate it stop it with the Steve/Nancy shit I’m on my knees I’m BEGGING

Hopper figuring out how to make a Molotov cocktail in prison he’s amazing he’s showstopping he’s incredible

“Papa, I bet that old American did most of the monster slaying” vibes

Jesus, hopper wanting el to be growing and changing and learning and meanwhile el is underground and being re-traumatized by brenner

Murray looking like he’s shitting himself in that van while lying to the guards he’s amazing

Seeing all this shit, how much brenner spoke with all the kids individually, it kinda doesn’t make sense to me why el could hardly speak or knew a lot when she got out. Like reading and writing sure, those are learned, but you learn to talk by being talked to and by talking so. Idk if this makes sense it just makes me feel a little odd. Plus the older kids have a big vocabulary so ??? What is the truth

COLLAR HIM WHAT

Good. Now we get to see the actual fucking torture DUDE BRENNER SUCKS SO HARD WHY ARE THEY TRYING TO MAKE HIM BETTER

Jesus christ what the fuck is going on

Eddie looking so distressed when Steve doesn’t get the ozzy reference I’ve seen it in so many gifs it’s incredible

(Also Steve was not engaging bc he knows ozzy and he knows that moment billy made him watch it about a thousand times on mtv but now that he’s gone, it’s a really painful memory)

YES EDDIE TELLING STEVE HOW MUCH DUSTIN LOVES HIM IM CRYING MERLIN AND I WERE JUST TALKING ABOUT THIS

EDDIE SAYING HE WAS JEALOUS this scene fucks so hard omg

“I was too ashamed to be the only one left behind” EDDIE

EDDIE DO NOT TELL STEVE TO GET HER BACK STOP STOP STOP DO NOT FUCKING ENDORSE THIS UNHOLY UNION

Bro eddie needs to shut up fr Steve and Nancy should NOT get back together and I have so many fucking thoughts about it that it would be it’s own post entirely

Okay but I really hope they do some shit with the lights and Dustin and Lucas realize the gang is in that house that would FUCK

Dustin’s look when Erica says she’ll say what was under Lucas’s bed amazing

ERICA DIDNT KNOW THIS SHIT AFTER THE MALL??? Nobody filled her in????

Vecna opened it up obv

Okay but this Dustin and Lucas scene of them riffing off each other and figuring it out is so so good this is what I missed from stranger things this is what I loves about seasons 1 and 2

YES I SEE THAT LIGHT FLICKERING THATS YOU UPSIDE DOWNERS

STEVE IS THE ONE THATS GONNA FIGURE OUT HOW TO TALK TO DUSTIN AND LUCAS

Okay but the upside down being stuck in time of three years ago kind of fucks

Meanwhile Steve’s just screaming downstairs

“Maybe he really does have rabies” VIBES

I’m???? The magic around the lights is big time cheesey tbh

“Does anyone know Morse code?”

“Does sos count? Is that-is that good?” WHAT DO YOU THINK, DARLING????? Eddie is QUICKLY becoming a blorbo. (Except for that painful moment where he told Steve to get with Nancy but he wasn’t thinking right)

It’s not Vecna it’s your besties dw

I think they just should’ve had eddie touch the light the red magic shit looks really dumb to me

This shot in the Russian prison is BANANAS I’m freaking out

HOPPER HES THERE HES RIGHT THERE

Horse plinko

Not these MEAN MUGS the older kids have going on this is so funny to me

Why is this chess set so weird and ornate

Fucking brenner I just hate HATE him

I don’t trust brenner I don’t trust #1 I don’t trust anyone here

Lucas and Dustin fucking yeeting the lite brite and Erica giving her candy lmao

Eddie going “HI” and Steve like 🙄🫤🤨

Dustin: “We think we have a theory that can help with that”

Robin: “genius child”

“His tone, right” love LOVE him

“Honestly shouldn’t have gone with her first. She’s like, kinda mean” CALLAHAN

Callahan coming up the stairs going “oh little pigs, oh little pigs” like dude you’re the cop.

ERICA SLASHED THE TIRE FOR FUCKS SAKE SHES AMAZING

NOT THE TRANSITION FROM THE KIDS TO THE UPSIDE DOWN GANG

What song would save you from being vecna’d? I think mine would be crazy frog.

Is this really how she escaped??? I kinda wish that her escape was just always left a mystery tbh but this way is actually big time anticlimactic

Oh fuck the tracker in his neck made me SICK to look at

See in these flashbacks el has one hell of a vocabulary but we know that when she meets up with the boys she doesn’t know the word promise

HES MAKING A FLAMING SPEAR that’s so sexy aaaahahah

“The Americans are very tricky” in that super exaggerated American accent VIBES

Holy god the lighter being out of fuel

THE MOMENT THE DEMOGORGON FUCKING SPRINTS OUT OF THE DARKNESS I watched it three times at half speed so good

(Still wish this bitch was practical though)

This is the goriest scene in st so far and I wish it was MORE

“I gotta hand it to you commies. You’re committed” Murray’s karate is my favorite thing to come out of this season. He’s out here like billy zabka but not fucking painful

Not Joyce pressing all the fucking buttons queen shit

DUDE THE SPEAR THROW RIGHT JN ITS FUCKING FACE OH MY GOD

THEY DINT KNOW THAT JOYCE IS THERE OH SHIT this reunion is gonna make me cry with the slo mo

Okay but hopper at first not realizing what’s going on and then holding her back and smiling into the top of her head I’m freaking out

Okay but lowkey the look of (guys specifically) wearing long pants that aren’t fitted around the ankle and no shoes is one of my least favorite things ever and it always has been

THE KIDS

This is kinda cool with the gate in the ceiling and the mirrored shots of the trailer and the kids looking at the upside down gang

So he’s just manipulating el to get rid of the thing that makes him not lose his marbles

Cool

So it’s NOT how she got out okay nvm

El, You’re surprised?? I’m fucking not

That’s where she learned the ol’ neck snapper though

And he’s number one I fucking called it

Wait this is trippy with the rope going through the ceiling. Gravity’s about to get real weird

“Those stains are, uh, I don’t know what those stains are” KING SHIT

WHAT that’s so cool it’s sustained between them that’s awesome

Every time I see the Dio logo on the back of the denim vest I think it says Djo lol

WAIT WHAT THE FUCK

Oh christ the pool

This is so spicy for Nancy (imagine if it had been Steve though that would fuck to explore his guilt)

SO BARB WQS TAKEN BY VECNA???

Oh that’s some gross shit from the pool. Once again, I called the pool being filled with gross black shit in my powers!steve fic lol

No wait OF COURSE el hasn’t escaped yet this is like 1979 or some shit

He’s Vecna. #1 is totally Vecna

So is this why the upside down is always trying to kill 11? WAIT IN SAESON 3 BILLY/MINDFLAYER SAID HE WAS BUILDING AN ARMY FOR HER yeah it’s bc vecna is weirdly obsessed with her

Okay but what does the creep house have to do with vecna? Like why is it there that he set up shop and his psychic link is through that

OH THATS FUCKING WHY HES THE KID WHAT WHAT WHAT

Oh it’s all coming together

As a certified Spider Kid his obsession with these big fucking black widows is ????

“They, like me, are solitary creatures and deeply misunderstood. They are gods of our world.” GOD SHUP YOURE SO ANNOYING

He’s literally the worst. And people like this character??? He’s painful

He fucking SUCKS

You know most serial killers start out with animal cruelty

“She despised me for it.” NO SHE JUST REALIZES THAT YOURE A KILLER AND YOUVE GOT A FUCKED UP CIEW OF THE WORLD

This whole flashback is too much exposition tbh

Brenner did all those tattoos?? That’s lowkey impressive

This is big time fucked up

Those fucking slipper shoes are so weird just have them in socks or barefoot

001 to me is what billy is to the rest of the fandom

The way I absolutely can’t stand him

These last 20 have really lost me tbh

Oh GROSS

Not only did El essentially banish him to the UD she also skinned him

WHY does it look like he’s falling to super hell

THE REAL HORSE PLINKO

Knew it