#i think its so funny if they do all that shit while also technically having the goal of becoming a better person. girl they are going to ge

[suffarustuffaru]

hi i made a tier list of how homophobic rezero characters are

hello in the spirit of valentine's day and the very welcoming community here on rezero tumblr i decided to make this with the help of my lovely mutuals.

[boygirlctommy]

thinking about it and the funniest thing about a dsmp/infinity train au is that like 99% of that shit could happen on the train. like some aus have to make an equivalent of events or groups but the eggpire could happen pretty much 1:1 on the train

[ajdrawshq]

got a shit ton of 3ds games recently n am going thru the ones that interest me whenever i have time that isnt being used for taking the cat off the curtains. so far that has been Ever Oasis n Code of Princess n FE Fates. i like them :]

[chirpycloudyrobin]

Previous || Masterlist || START || Next

wei wuxian had barely dusted off the magma from the kiln off his person when he gets rudely yanked to mo village and mo xuanyu's side. he appears before mo xuanyu still in his bloodied yiling laozu set up and theyre both ??? confused as fuck because what the hell that wasnt supposed to happen !

turns out the whole sacrificial summon array didnt account for the possibility of summoning a ghost king. so there was no soul replacement, mo xuanyu is still alive, and wei wuxian once again walks with the living. ish. hes still dead. technically

now what ?

well mo xuanyu mustve been pretty desperate to unsubscribe from the reincarnation cycle just to get revenge on his family so wei wuxian hears him out ,,, and really really doesnt like the hand that mo xuanyu has been dealt with in his life so hes like welp time to tap into ye olde wuxian the helping hand. might as well bring in some justice now that hes back and better than ever !

but first wwx shldnt walk around looking like the entire cultivation world's worst nightmare so they brainstorm a new identity for him in that little shack.

they end up deciding that wwx will be a distant mo cousin. for wwx's disguise, he gave himself the birth name mo ling and the courtesy name mo shanxi. he is mo yi, courtesy name mo xuanyu's, other maternal cousin but like further down the family tree. a fourth son of a fourth son. parents dead, siblings dead. lots of fours, lots of death in the identity and the name. it's funni, cuz wwx is dead and hes a ghost and- you get the idea.

mo shanxi's an eccentric ex-rogue cultivator whose cultivating career ended early at the hands of the late core-melting hand. he has no sword because no core. hes friendly with crows because rogue cultivator things. he has a dizi because hes a traveler, a peasant, decidedly not gentry. an absolutely fool-proof disguise. no one would guess hes wei wuxian at all ! no one !

they still bust into the meeting between madam mo and the lan juniors and wwx helps mxy embarrass the entire family. they also still stay around to watch shit happen and it's during this time where wwx gives mxy practical lessons on fighting and cultivation. not demonic cultivation, mind, wwx doesnt want to damage mxy's fledgling golden core.

mxy is witness firsthand how wwx just bluescreens and takes A Minute to process seeing adult lan wangji. mxy knows that lwj is One Fine Ass Man and he, too, would undoubtedly climb lwj like a tree but wwx's reaction to lwj is just ,,, different.

hm, mxy thinks. interesting.

soon wwx snaps out of his "holy-shit-lwj" trance, grabs mxy's hand and skedaddles out of there. its funny, its camp, mxy has more questions than answers.

the entire mo family (besides mxy) is dead. the contract is complete. mxy is free.

"ykw," wwx thinks. "let's be rogue cultivators and ill teach you everything i know !" "i have absolutely nothing better to do," mxy says. "fuck it, lets go" "great ! for ur first lesson lets check out that story of a soul eating entity at dafan mountain" "what"

so ! dafan mountain. lessons going good, mxy has a good head on his shoulders. and then wwx accidentally insults his shijie's child. and then he and mxy are trapped between jc and lwj. and then they ,,, get out of it unscathed ? um

whatever, back to the lessons !

mxy was not having the best time in his life. shit got way out of hand way too quickly. he cant do anything to help in the fight so hes just trying to keep himself alive while wwx is trying to save everyone. theres too many crows and ravens yelling.

... why the fuck is wwx playing a dizi badly ?

mxy knows wwx is some kind of powerful ghost or whatever but now is not the time for a bad dizi concert ! senior wei please !!

mxy just feels really out of his depths right now as he watches everything unfold from his safe(ish) place high up a tree with a couple of wwx's creepy red-eyed crows.

he watches as the fucking ghost general answers wwx's dizi calls apparently ? (mxy may be half insane but he still knows the ghost stories they all tell about the yiling laozu and his ghost general)

he watches as wwx attempts to lead the ghost general to safety, and how his attempt is thwarted by none other than hanguang-jun himself. and then mxy is forced to watch the world's most awkward, most tense reunion in all the earth.

and then mxy sees sandu shengshou fucking whip wwx and attempt to do it a second time and he really, really cant just sit there and watch his saviour and senior be bullied.

so mxy jumps down, startles the living shit out of everyone, and proceeds to yell at them all. accuses jc of harrassment, of abuse of power, of weird kinks. wwx catches onto what mxy is doing and joins in the insanity, adding that lwj is more his type for good measure

senior wei, mxy thinks, watching lwj gaze at wwx with something in his eyes. what the actual fuck ?

if anyone asks how the hell they both ended up becoming guests at the cloud recesses, mxy will gladly tell them that it's all wwx's fault. at least mxy ended up being roomed at actual guest quarters. god knows what kind of shit is happening with wwx getting roomed in the jingshi of all places

NAME NOTES

Mò Yí (莫怡) — mo xuanyu's birthname in this au ! i like to think his mother gave him that birth name because she really wanted him to have a happy future :]

Mò Líng (莫玲) — 玲 is an onomatopoeia, referring to the sound jades make when they are hit. i like to think wwx chose this name on the spot absolutely not thinking about how a certain jade was doing lol

Mò Shànxì (莫善戲) — now this one is fun ! i took this from one of the poems in the Classic of Poetry aka Shijing aka the oldest existing collection of Chinese poetry and one of the Five Classics. it's taken from the third paragraph of the poem Qi Yu from the Odes of Wei (as in the state of Wey. unfortunately not the same wei in wwx's name. thats a diff state)

瞻彼淇奧、綠竹如簀。 有匪君子、如金如錫、如圭如璧。 寬兮綽兮、猗重較兮。 [善戲] 謔兮、不為虐兮。 Look at those recesses in the banks of the Qi, With their green bamboos, so dense together! There is our elegant and accomplished prince, - [Pure] as gold or as tin, [Soft and rich] as a sceptre of jade! How magnanimous is he and gentle! There he is in his chariot with its two high sides! Skilful is he at quips and jokes, But how does he keep from rudeness in them!

so 善戲 should translate to "good at theatrical shows" as in he's good at putting on a show ! since mo ling is essentially just a role wwx is playing and all lmao. BUT ALSO the last sentence where i took the characters describes wwx pretty well. the sentence describes the lord aka the subject of the poem as someone who is good at playing games, jokes etc. but his jokes would never be intended to harm or to be rude. so wwx :]

his disguise's courtesy name also has a nice though subtle common element w lan wangji's birth name since the zhan is thought to also be taken from the five classics uwu

[thinkingrocks]

vox's life: headcannons

im an electrical engineer and i have opinions on this character. moral of the story: don't fuck with CRT capacitors, shits scary

i have a lot of Vox thoughts, or Voughts, and i will be rambling about them at legnth under the cut.

TLDR: he invented zuckerberging. also i see his "canon" death date of 1950s and respectfully disagree. its way funnier if he died the year widespread television became a thing. the fruits of his labor were all for naught etc etc

1928: Vox was in college as an electrical engineer when the first ever live TV Demo happened, and I think he was immediately obsessed with it. Decided he'd do anything to work with TV. He and his friend/roommate at the time went full tilt into learning about TVs and working on them, and by the time they graduated, they had the beginnings of what would be a very profitable company.. together.

1930s: Out of the two of them, Vox has the better social skills(relative), so he's the one who talks to investors and handles that part of the business, though he still works on some tech. He decides he likes talking to people, marketing, manipulating, being a little showman. I like to think this ties into that one trivia fact that he likes watching commercials.

early 1940s: He starts wondering why he's splitting half of this company(HIS company) with some guy who can't even bother to attend business meetings. Tensions start rising, he starts using some of that handy manipulation skill he honed in business on his friends

1945: Tensions break. Through less than legitimate means, he steals the company out from under his partner. His partner threatens to go start his own, since he did the majority of the tech work. We can't have that. Vox doesn't kill him himself, imo, because he is kind of allergic to getting his hands dirty. He revs up that media training and uses it to create a smear campaign so brutal and widespread that his former partner offs himself. Problem solved

Late 1940s: Vox starts getting paranoid about people trying to steal his empire from him, funny that. He starts trying to do everything himself, because he doesn't trust anyone. Starts losing a lot of sleep, getting a little insane but its fine man. Don't worry about it.

1947: Sleep deprived, paranoid, and working on a final prototype model due soon, he electrocutes himself because you shouldn't fuck with CRT capacitors. Wakes up in hell with electricity powers and a CRT head because it's hilarious.

Alastor: Yeah we all know what we're here for. I don't think they ever met in life, but I definitely think Vox knew of him. Alastor was actively broadcasting during the 20s up until his death in 1933, and college student Vox I think listened to a lot of radio while studying and working. I also think in the later years, Alastor was never technically caught as a serial killer, but "hey I think that radio guy was that one killer, cuz he stopped broadcasting right after he stopped killing" was like one of those insane conspiracy statements you'd say to get a laugh at parties, but Vox always secretly kind of believed it, and was VERY vindicated in hell.

I am fully prepared for actual canon to contradict all of this but that's fine because it means they finally had to get season 2 out.

[mufos-photo-album]

The Spearmaster, dressed up as his primary design inspirations

If you like reading, I've included commentary about the Spearmaster's inspirations below the cut.

I don't have as much to say about the Spearmaster's design compared to the Swordmaster, since his design doesn't stray that far from Piripu's base design. The biggest departure is the mane the Spearmaster has, which is directly inspired by Goku's (of Dragon Ball, if I needed to tell you) Super Saiyan 3 design. The thing is, I never referenced the SS3 design at all when first drawing the Spearmaster, so his hairstyle is moreso based on my vague memory of what super saiyans with long hair look like. As a result, the Spearmaster's hair looks a lot softer than Goku's, which is so spiky. Not something I'm upset about, but I do find it very funny.

Ah right, there's also the second guy in the drawing — Bobby from the Deadcells animated trailers. He's technically called the Beheaded but Bobby is the named used for the guy in the trailers. From the start I knew I wanted the Spearmaster to be cool, but I also wanted him to be charming (an aspect which may not carry visually all the time but one I try to keep in mind while writing). In the animated trailers, Bobby depicted equal parts cool and equal parts silly. Can hold himself up in a fight, but no doubt has an arrogant/cocky side that leads him to, for lack of better words, eat shit. I think there's also something somewhere about Bobby having a flair for the dramatic. Some of these aspects are reflected in how I see the Spearmaster. Goku also has some charming aspects about him but I can only describe them in vaguer terms. Like, look at the reference photo I put in the image above. Doesn't his smile scream "It's me, Goku!"?

These characters have more to do with how I see the Spearmaster carrying himself in battle as opposed to more mundane situations.

Kyoko Sakura, from Puella Magi Madoka Magica: Probably the character that solidified my choice in making Piripu the Spearmaster after realizing Sayaka was an inspiration for the Swordmaster. Kyoko has a specific lunging attack she does which I often imagine the Spearmaster doing as well.

Morganite, from Land of the Lustrous: When thinking about how the Spear/Swordmaster fight, there was this one video I'd watch a lot as reference. It mainly features Morganite fighting alongside their partner Goshanite. Aside from the swaggy animation, I'll point out that the dialogue between Morganite and Goshanite is very similar to how I see an exchange between the Sword/Spearmaster going. Morga/Gosha even have vaguely similar color schemes to the Spear/Swordmaster!

Bort, also from Land of the Lustrous: As you might see from the reference photo of them I used, Bort's hair lends itself to making very unique shapes while Bort is in action. I forget where in the manga this scene appears, but there's a moment where Bort is depicted descending upon an enemy, but its shot from afar. Despite the distance, you can still tell its them from the abstract shape of their hair. This aspect is something I'd like to tap into if I drew the Spearmaster in action.

[likeabulldigidigibombombombom]

Stray kids x genderneutral!reader headcanons

Random Stray Kids prompt headcanons because I’m too lazy to write a whole fucking fic but I still want to post:

Pairing: Stray kids x Genderneutral!reader, established relationships for all of them

Warnings: Just fluff, one teeny tiny mention of throwing up, Remember that this is all just my opinion!

Would they win a pillow fight against you?

Bang Chan:

Technically, yes

But my guy is too whipped to allow you to loose

He’s gonna let you win

And he’s also gonna let you brag about it

He’s so cute AShSJKMVFNDjsk

Lee Know:

Yes.

My guy is gonna be COMPETITIVE

You better run

He wont back down

He is gonna tease you about your loss for days

It’s hot though

(is it just me that finds being teased hot???)

Anyways you’re absolutely done for😻😻😻

Changbin:

I think it’s 50/50

On one hand he would totally win and then brag about it endlessly

Like bro is jacked there is no way he wouldn’t win

Lots of muscle flexing if he wins😶

But

On the other hand

He is baby girl

He would loose and complain

He would be pouting for the rest of the day

Hyunjin:

No

Bro is dramatic asf

If you hit him, my guy is going to be screaming, crying, throwing up into a pillow case instantly

I don’t think I need to explain anymore

Han:

No

He would try 

Eventually you’d end up getting the upper hand

He’d be the type to just hold the pillow above his head to protect himself and scream

I think he’d just congratulate you when you decide to spare him💀

Felix

Yes

I have no idea why but I think he’d just be insane at pillow fights

He seems like the type to just be good at them

He’d be so sweet about winning though

He’d eventually give up after declaring his win and just cuddle with you instead😭

Seungmin:

Yes

This bitch is evil

How do you cheat in a pillow fight?

Idfk but he’ll find a way

After winning this dumbass will be pinning you to the floor while making fun of you for losing

If you tell him that he cheated he’ll just evily laugh and ignore you

Literally satan if he had an adorable laugh and was hot

I.N

Mostly no

Most of the time he won’t put any effort in

“Isn’t this a bit too childish?”

If you do get him to participate he’s winning

He’ll be putting up the fight of his life

Similar to Seungmin, he will be pinning you to the floor while making fun of you for losing

Bro is trying to make you blush

If he succeeds his mission will be complete

What are their love languages?

Bang Chan:

Words of affirmation

He will shower you in praise

But you need to shower him back

Call him pretty.

Call him talented.

Call him sweet.

He will melt

Lee Know:

Gift giving

Bro is bad with words

He’ll give you cute shit

You’ll give him cute shit

You’ll both be happy 

Changbin:

Quality time

He needs to be screaming into your ear at all times

Hyunjin:

Quality time

He just wants to hang out with you😭😭😭

Han:

Acts of service

Idk why I think this

Bro is just whipped for you

He’ll do anything 

Felix

Physical touch

This is obvious

Just let the bitch hug you

Seungmin:

This was hard

Probably gift giving

I don’t have much reasoning

He just gives the vibes

I.N

Acts of service

He wants to do shit for you

He wants you to do shit for him

It's practical

How much would they tease you and what they would tease you about?

(I love this prompt my brain is so incredible)

Bang Chan:

I don’t think he’d tease you very much

If he does its more like 😻 instead of 😼

It would usually be you blushing at one of his many shit pickup lines he says instead of just making fun of it

“Aw look at you!”

“You’re so pretty when you blush”

“Did my pick up line work? Are you in love with me now?”

Lee Know:

Daily

24/7

Bro can’t stop

It would be for you making a mistake, blushing, breathing or doing anything at all

If you show any signs of getting flustered from his teasing YOU BETTER RUN

“How did you even do that? What is going on inside your head?���

“Oh my god are you blushing?!”

“I made you blush! That is so funny”

“You are so red, it’s so fucking cute”

I gave up on the rest of the members because I'm sleep deprived😻😻😻 sorry🤷‍♀️

Where would they kiss you the most?

Bang Chan:

Cheek

You’re sitting down doing nothing

He’ll kiss you on the cheek

You’re making some food

He’ll kiss you on the cheek

You’re having a bad day

HE’LL KISS YOU ON THE FUCKING CHEEK

Cheek is a weird word

Lee Know:

Forehead

I love wholesome Minho shit

He’ll look deep into your eyes and kiss your forehead at random times in the day

Mainly before you go to sleep

(sleep is what i need rn)

Changbin:

Nose

It’s so cute😭

I love my brain

Bro would just come up to you and kiss your nose and hug you

Changbin is so pookie

Hyunjin:

Hands

In a previous headcanon I called him poetic

He is still poetic

My guy is a mother father gentleman

Han:

Lips

It’s normal

It’s also super cute

Han is so bbg

Felix

Eyelids

Poetic pt2

The word eyelids sounds so aggressive

Eyelids😈👹👿

Imagine shutting your eyes, about to go to sleep and you feel soft lips placing gentle kisses on your 👹eyelids👹

It’s so cute

But the word eyelids isn't

Seungmin:

Lips pt2

It’s normal

As I said, it’s also really cute

Basic is good sometimes LMAO

I.N

Neck

Bro likes to fluster you idk what to say

Getting hugged from behind by him and feeling kisses going down your neck aGFgyuhbVGyhuJbgHJBVghJBgyui

How good would they be at cooking (scale of 1-10)?

Bang Chan:

7/10

Good enough

He can totally cook for you if you don’t feel up to it

But he isn’t a 5-star Michelin 

Lee Know:

10/10

Cooking god

How does he have so much skill???

Changbin:

5/10

Nothing has burnt down yet

He knows how to follow a recipe

Screaming can regularly be heard from the kitchen

Hyunjin:

6/10

The stuff he makes may not be Lee Know level, but it works

He seems like the type to find it calming

Han:

4/10

The stuff he makes doesn’t taste good

He can make it

Just not well

Frozen meals>

Felix

5/10

He’s way better at baking

The stuff he makes will look like shit and taste decent

At least you can survive off of the food

The Michelin shit was a lie dude😭

Seungmin:

2/10

Seungmin, babe, no.

Fires have burned

Ash has been consumed

Pure chaos

He's gonna be laughing about it too

I.N

8/10

He’s taking a Zoom class

He can cook some scrumptious shit

Author note: Like always, constructive criticism is wanted! If you liked this, please follow me for more fanfics like this one <3 Thank you!

Masterlist

[onesidedradiostatic]

regarding the drool thing i highly doubt its a death mark or something like that given that a lot of characters do it and it isnt like. a permanent affect on his screen

also the insistence that its vals saliva therefore every seen hes salivating must have kissed val before. obviously that isnt true but i think its infinitely more telling that hes constantly SALIVATING. like do you have sialorrhea or are you just happy to see me?

even lucifer does it in hells greatest dad! though his is yellow like his blood..

so some homestuck troll shit-

my actual belief is that it isnt really saliva (atleast in the case of vox. lucifer. alastor.. we know vals is saliva) but instead blood and its supposed to indicate that the character is being "bloodthirsty" / violent.

it would make sense given all the scenes we see it used.

vox telling pentious to kill himself. the beginning of stayed gone. vox's finale hate boner. alastor doing creepy radio demon shit.

lucifer is even SAYING the word Blood during his scene. though its in the context of the family line, given the timing i can only imagine its deliberate.

the only exception id say would be at the end of poison (unless they're concocting a really devious plan). though id wager to say that in that scene specifically it actually is valentinos saliva

in this scene and this scene alone vox red droplets were on the left side of the screen (theres technically another time, buts its really on both sides of his screen there so).

this is right after we see angel with driplets on his left side, and you can see that val has his on the right side, (which is weird cause he mostly has it on his left side too?) which would be the sides to link up during a kiss

or maybe they're just sprite flipped idk

(follow-up to this ask)

tbf like

the cross on alastor's forehead isn't a permanent effect for him either (and it's been stated by ex-staff that alastor was shot in the head by a hunter so we basically know that's a death mark for him)

for lucifer's case I just thought he bit his lip while saying the line cause he was that pissed LMAO, funny how his blood is like an ugly yellow in that scene compared to the usual glowing yellow or gold we see from other angels. (also not the fucking homestuck troll comparison ksdkfflhl SOLLUX CAPTOR??)

my actual belief is that it isnt really saliva (atleast in the case of vox. lucifer. alastor.. we know vals is saliva) but instead blood and its supposed to indicate that the character is being "bloodthirsty" / violent.

I mean yeah I believe that, I've mentioned it before it appears when vox shows strong emotion. the reason I subscribed to that one anon's death mark theory is cause alastor's red "x" appears whenever he semi brings out his demon form (the example we see of alastor bleeding from the mouth too also has that "x")

and yeah, I think poison is like the SOLE outlier to this, all other times he has the red lines he's showing some kind of strong/violent/feral emotion. I originally just held the idea vox produced it himself and the strong emotions were actually from making out with val (yes I do actually think they made out in this scene I just didn't buy into the val saliva theory) but you bringing up the different side of the lines from usual and the mirroring is a good point actually, I didn't realise that, honestly changed my mind and convinced me that yeah this specific case it is val's saliva

see the thing is, I do think it CAN mean he was making out with val I just don't think it NECESSARILY does cause of all the times it happens outside of val like I said. in this case, yeah they were probably making out LMAO.

in other cases, nope.

my thing isn't that I'm against the idea of it coming from val, it's more like some people act like it's a definite indicator that they were making out whenever vox has it, but I don't think that's the case at all, the red lines are definitely something vox can form by himself

[analogwriting]

Recovery

Smutilogue (afab edition) Donquixote Rosinante x gn!reader word count: 3.1k first|amab version a/n: here's the cora smut y'all been feinding for. technically this is an epilogue, but it also works as standalone. im lit as shit rn as usual when i write that shit - so enjoy. as usual, there are two versions. one afab, one amab but they both have diff things happen. (one rails the other rides ain't that great) also amore is love in italian and amor is love in spanish which tbh its cute n funny to me

“Ugh, it's so nice to finally be home,” you grumbled as you walked into the door of your house. At this point, you hadn't been home for a month and a half, but luckily you had cleaning services to maintain everything while you were away. Marco had also been sure to check on the house, he had a spare key, after all. 

“I think this is the first time I've been in your home.” You looked back to Corazon who was closing the door. “Well, benvenuto in casa mia.” You chuckled as you set your things down. Man, it was good to be home. 

You set your things down on the couch, letting Corazon explore your place while you checked everything. Windows, exits, the likes. You just wanted to make sure no one had broken in at any point. Marco had done this for you too and you had an alarm system, but with recent events, you couldn't be too cautious at this point. 

You headed into your room, seeing your boyfriend standing and staring at something on the floor in your closet. “Whatcha doin’?” 

You could've swore he jumped ten feet in the air. He looked back at you with panic in his eyes as he closed the door. “N-Nothing!”

Your expression changed to that of a droll one. “I don't believe that for a single fucking second.” You walked over, moving him and opening the door. 

Oh. Right. You'd forgotten that you meant to go through that and get rid of some stuff. 

There, in the middle of your closet, was a box of sex toys. You weren't embarrassed about it, if anything you were amused. You snorted, looking at him. He couldn't make eye contact with you. “Oh, you're just the cutest.” You reached up, pinching his cheek, causing his face to turn a deeper shade of red. 

“What's got you so flustered, amore? Imagine me using these on you?” A sly grin spread across your face as you pulled out a double ended strap. 

You heard him gasp softly and you looked at him, his face still a bright red. You grinned. The two of you held out this long despite almost jumping each other a couple of times. You could see his blush creeping down his neck and to his collarbone, his breathing became shallow. Oh, he absolutely was thinking of you using these on him.

“Oh, you dirty boy,” you purred and he frowned, quickly turning to head out of the room. You grabbed his wrist, pulling him back. You moved just right to get him to stumble onto the bed, quickly straddling him in the process. 

He looked at you with wide eyes, but he wasn't protesting. “Y-You should be recovering,” he mumbled. A large smile spread across your face. 

“That's all I've been doing.” However, if he was uncomfortable, you weren't gonna make him do anything. “But, if you don't wanna, that's okay.” You kissed him softly, smiling against him before moving to slide off his lap. 

Before you could go too far, you felt his hands on your hips, pulling you forward. You blinked, looking at him. His face was still bright red, but you could see the lusty haze beginning to form in his eyes. You had him right where you wanted him.

“Only if you're sure you don't need to recover some more,” he said. 

A smug smile spread across your face. “Oh, I'm just fine.” You kissed him again, hungrier this time. The two of you groaned against each other as it quickly became a heated exchange. You appreciated his concern, but you were just fine and you were about to be even better. 

You pressed a hand to his chest, pushing him down into the bed, following suit as you kissed at him. You reached under his shirt, feeling him up. You slowly lifted his shirt, resting it above his chest as your lips trailed to his neck, leaving hickies in their wake. Your hands explored his body, fingers gently tracing his scars. He shivered, his breathing shaking as small noises of pleasure escaped his lips.

Having him at your mercy like this was…delicious. 

Your fingers brushed over his nipples, twirling around them before pinching them softly. He gasped, arching his back as a small whimper escaped his lips. This was something you could definitely get used to. You moved down, beginning to kiss at his chest now; your lips gently pressing against his skin. He pressed into you as he moaned your name.

Who knew he could be so submissive? Sure, he always gave in to you, but you didn’t think that he’d be this submissive in bed. You were going to make sure to give him the shag of his life. 

You continued to kiss down his torso, taking a couple of detours to kiss a scar here and there. You two had that in common; bodies littered with scars from your former lifestyle that you were born into and were able to escape from. You reached the waistband of his pants, beginning to unbutton them. His breathing had already grown shallow as he looked down at you with a flushed face. 

You sat up for a moment, just admiring his beauty. Him just laying before you, face and body flushed, beginning to glisten with sweat. His chest was moving up and down rapidly as he was already breathless. His shirt pushed up over his chest with his pants slightly undone while looking disheveled…you honestly were tempted to take a picture. Make it the background on your phone maybe. Though, Marco had access to your phone, you didn’t want to embarrass Corazon like that.

A grin slowly stretched across your face. “Already this worked up?” You could tell by the tent in his pants that he was more than ready for you to do whatever you pleased with him.

You absolutely planned on railing him today - give him the time of his life. He deserved it after all he's done for you and the fact he's stuck around despite the absolute shit show your life has been the past couple of months. 

“How can I not be? I've been waiting forever,” he mumbled, looking away from you, covering his mouth with his hand. You just grinned at him like an idiot for a moment. His gaze shifted back to you. “W-What?”

“Nothing, you're just so pretty,” you mused, licking your lips. He groaned softly, covering his face again and you chuckled, finally making your next move. 

Your hands moved quickly, freeing him from the constraints of his pants. He twitched and throbbed against your hand as the cool air hit him. You expected him to be on the bigger side considering how large the man was himself, but you weren't too worried considering you were going to be the one railing him this time around. Maybe you'd ride him next time. 

This was about him this time around. You wanted to express your gratitude for everything. 

You leaned down, pressing your lips to the base of his cock. His breathing hitched and he let out a tiny whine. “You tease too much,” he mumbled. 

You just smiled at him. “It's because you're so fun to tease.” You decided to do so just a little bit more. Taking your tongue, you started from the base, dragging it along the underside all the way to the top before swirling it around his head and pressing a kiss to it. The entire time he whined, his back arching - he was completely and totally at your mercy.

“Please,” he mumbled, his voice breathy and desperate. Oh, you liked that. “Please what?” you asked, beginning to stroke him, your thumb brushing over his head. 

He just looked at you with a pained look in his eyes, his hips bucking slightly, begging for more friction. His pupils were blown with lust and you were eating it up. “Please stop teasing me,” he gasped as you squeezed him slightly as his base. 

“Mm, I guess.” You decided to finally show him some mercy. You could tease him further, make him say even lewder things, but you decided to take it easy this time around. This was only the first time, after all. There'd be plenty more to come. You wanted to hear him yell your name, honestly. Nothing would get you going more than being able to hear him desperately calling your name in such a lewd manner. 

Finally, you gave him what he wanted, sliding him down your throat. Every time you did something like this, you were a bit worried about getting lockjaw so you tried your best not to overextend your jaw. Even if it did happen, you were a doctor and could take care of it, but it wouldn't make it any less embarrassing. 

Your eyes widened slightly as he rolled his hips, shoving himself down your throat even further. You pressed down on his hips, holding him in place as you pulled off of him for a moment. “Careful there, eager mcbeaver. I'm the one in charge,” you said, panting a bit. He looked down at you through half lidded eyes, pouting slightly. Fuck, he was so hot. 

You resumed what you were doing, taking him into your mouth once more. You could feel him straining under you to keep from moving. Good boy, you’d be sure to reward him well. It wasn't long before you started to work him, bobbing your head as your hands gripped at his thighs - mostly keeping him in place. You could also feel that he was going to be sent over the edge at any moment. 

Using one of your hands, you began to fondle his balls, causing him to whimper and moan. “Y/n!” His voice was a high whine, breaking halfway through. You gave his balls a nice tug and squeeze, causing him to buck his hips and shoving himself down your throat even further than the time before. He moaned loudly as he came and you did your best to not choke at his sudden movements. You were so glad you didn’t really have a gag reflex, but he still made it hard.

Though, you should've seen that coming from a mile away. 

You pulled off of him, swallowing every bit of cum he had before fully pulling off of him. You were panting heavily, as was he. He placed an arm over his face as you moved up. You removed it, kissing him hard. “I'm sorry,” he mumbled against you, so breathless you almost didn't hear him. 

You smiled. “It's okay. I should've expected it. I didn’t exactly play fair.” You pulled away from him, sliding off the bed. He looked at you, confused and sitting up on his elbows. “Where are you going?”

“You were curious about the strap, remember? When I come back out, you better be naked.”

You watched as his eyes widened before he nodded and you grinned, disappearing into the bathroom, and grabbing the toy along the way. 

You reemerged, significantly less clothes than before. That being, you had none. All you donned was the strap. You almost sent yourself over the edge just getting it on with how turned on you were just from making him lose it. Half of it was inside of you, after all. It was one of those double sides. 

Corazon had also followed instruction, now naked as he laid on your bed. He had been able to calm down a bit. He was no longer panting and his skin wasn't as flushed, but you knew that wouldn't last very long.

He looked over as you walked out, his own eyes widening. He licked his lips as he stared at you, devouring you with his eyes. “Stunning,” he mumbled, looking you up and down. You felt your face warm up. He sure knew how to flatter you. His eyes rested on the strap, swallowing hard. 

You walked over to him, kissing him on the way before rummaging through your nightstand and pulling out some lube. “Relax. Trust me. I won't hurt you.” He just looked at you before nodding. “I trust you.”

You grinned, sliding back onto the bed and in between his legs. You applied some to your fingers, looking at him. “I'm going to stretch you out first since this is your first time doing something anally, I assume.” He nodded, just staring at your hand. 

You would take your time, not wanting to go too fast and freak him out. You started with one finger, sliding it into him. He squirmed a bit, making a face of uncertainty. Once you started moving your digit around, he was quickly lost in the pleasure, relaxing a bit. He loosened a bit and you added another one, this time he moaned a bit, rolling his hips. You stopped moving, giving him a look. “Ah, ah. Patience.” 

He frowned, pouting and whining a bit. “You tease,” he mumbled, panting slightly already. You were absolutely eating up his desperation. You just grinned, beginning to move your fingers, scissoring them inside of him and curling them. You could feel him starting to relax more, loosening even moreso. Good. You didn't want to tear something. It wasn't long before you added the third. 

“Please,” he whined. “I think I'm more than ready.” He gasped, looking at you with agony. You snorted, grinning down at him. “I suppose.” You slowly pulled your fingers out, watching his eyes roll back and his back arch. Who knew he was such a little slut?

You moved to add some lube to the strap and once again, he was watching your every move. This time, however, it was more anticipation and excitement rather than fear and uncertainty. 

You positioned yourself in between his legs, sticking one on his legs over your shoulder. His face turned a deep shade of red as you did so. You pressed the head of the toy to him and heard his breath hitch. Again, a grin spread across your face in amusement before you slid the toy into him.

His eyes widened, rolling back before his head fell back onto the pillows. A long, loud, and whiny moan erupted from him, but he wasn't the only one. As you pressed into him, your side of the toy pressed deeper into you, causing you to moan right along with him. Both of you were panting by the time you bottomed out. Your head was spinning as you paused to gather yourself. 

It'd been a while since you fucked anyone and even longer since you topped. You weren't too sure how long you'd last. Hopefully long enough. 

After a moment of regathering, you looked at Corazon. He was panting heavily too, an arm over his face. You reached up, moving his hand. “I want to see that face.” 

He looked at you. Well, at least you think he did - he might’ve looked through you. He looked absolutely lost in whatever pleasure you were currently giving him. You took that as a sign to start moving. You pressed a kiss to his leg that was over your shoulder before you rolled your hips, moreso testing the water. 

You heard him gasp, watching him grip the sheets before melting into a puddle of pleasure. You also felt the toy inside you move, causing your own head to spin more rapidly.

You kept moving, pulling in and out of him. You were slow with your movements at first as you struggled to find a pace - you were a bit out of practice. It didn't take you too long to find it, though. Soon enough, you were quickly moving your hips, the room filling with nothing but the noises of your pleasure. 

It wasn't long before you were absolutely wrecking him, pistoning your hips in and out of him like you had everything to lose. He was crying out your name over and over, begging you for something you weren't even sure of because he never could finish his sentence. You could make out the word ‘yes’ a few times. His words were slurred and you were pretty sure he was drooling too. 

You could feel your own legs beginning to shake as the toy pressed and rubbed against all the right spots inside of you. Your entire body felt like it was on fire, the coil in your abdomen wound tightly. It was only a matter of time before you were out for the count. 

You were honestly surprised you lasted this long. 

A few thrusts and many moans later, you felt the wave of euphoria wash over you as the coil within snapped, sending you over the edge. You cried out Corazon's name, stilling your hips and shoving the toy deep within him. His own cries also bounced off the walls as he yelled your name, making a mess of the both of you as he reached his climax as well. 

Your entire body shuddered as you kept still, riding the euphoric waves of your climax. You were panting heavily, sweating a good amount too. Ugh, you were going to need a shower after this, but you also knew you were probably going to pass out.

After a bit of recovery, you pulled out of him, hearing him whine in response. You moved quickly, removing it from yourself as well, whining just as he did, feeling yourself twitch against the toy. You chuckled it on the floor, deciding to deal with it later. 

You moved, collapsing next to him. You looked up, pressing a kiss to his jaw before settling into his side, still panting like crazy. Your own heart was racing and you knew his would be too. With a deep breath, you closed your eyes, trying to calm your breathing a bit. You felt his arms wrap around you and pull you close. 

“Mm, how did you like it?” you asked, looking up at him. He looked down at you, a tired but goofy grin spreading across his face. “I'm…gonna be sore but…” He kissed you softly, sighing against your lips. “I'd do it again.”

You snorted, grinning. “Good to know. Guess I'll be keeping that after all then.” The both of you chuckled, settling down. You felt exhaustion creeping in. You were technically still in recovery, after all. 

“Mm, I love you, amore.” You pressed a kiss to his chest before closing your eyes again. “I love you too, amor.” He pressed a kiss against your head before settling in. It wasn't long before the two of you were out for the count.

[bigskydreaming]

The Vampire Daniel Molloy, when Louis asks what he's looking forward to most about the next stage of his newly immortal life:

Hmm. With how much my maker already complains about me ruining his life and how every day I give him a new reason to regret ever siring me, if I had to pick just one thing, I'd say the thing I'm most looking forward to is when I hit vampire puberty.

Louis: ....

Daniel: Vampire puberty's when the really wild superpowers kick in, right?

Louis: I suppose technically that's not....inaccurate.

Daniel: Hey, what are the chances of me getting the 'set shit on fire with my brain' thing you've got? Can you even imagine how much that would piss him off? His disappointment of a fledgling having the same gifts as the ex who dumped his ass....oh, man. C'mon now. I bet I could do some real damage with that.

Louis: Actually, while we're near the subject: would you please stop introducing yourself as 'the reason your vampire parents got divorced?'

Daniel: No, Louis, Louis! You're not getting it, see....the thing that makes it funny is its true.

Louis: You've really decided to lean into the whole 'second childhood' angle, huh.

Daniel: Mmmm. And just think. If you'd turned me fifty years ago when I first asked, I'd be well past this stage by now. And also still twenty. And hot.

Louis: Ahh. Its like that, then, is it.

Daniel: Oh, only a little bit. Really though, its like, every day I discover a new way to make Armand rue my very existence all over again, and maybe I'm just a simple man with simple needs, because that's just....very fun for me. I mean, there's just something extra validating in knowing the guy you're all "fuck that guy, I hate him, he sucks" about hates you waaaay more than you can be bothered to hate him. Because then its like you win the feud, right? You still get to hate that guy, which is great, because fuck that guy, he sucks, but you also get to know your very existence drives him way crazier than his ever makes you, and I mean, let's be real. Who doesn't like winning things?

Louis: Well I'm so glad you've found something that gives you a sense of purpose at least. Its very -

Daniel: Yeah, yeah, immortal blood drinkers need hobbies other than mass murder, it keeps the body count low and is good for the environment. Relax. I know. I literally wrote the book on it. You were there.

Louis: That's what you got out of it?

Daniel: Why, did you want me to fixate on your sex scenes instead? That seems weird. A little narcissistic even. And at the risk of self-awareness, when I'm the one -

Louis: Right. Well. I just wanted to make sure you had something to focus your energies on. It can all be a bit overwhelming at first and with your level of public attention at the moment, its very crit -

Daniel: Nope, all good here. Got myself a steady supply of Deadbeat Dad jokes that make my maker's eye twitch - apparently base word play is "gauche" or some shit - ugh, my god, its like nothing I do is ever good enough for him, and I only ate one of the editors on my shitlist to test drive my shiny new murder skills. He had this thing about Oxford commas, used to bug the crap out of me. Its like we get it, you hate them. They're literally dots on a page, they can't hurt you, can we please move on....

Louis: ....

Daniel: Louis, I'm kidding. Look, you don't have to worry about me. I already decided I find emotional evisceration way more satisfying than the physical version. Less clean up and it lasts longer anyway. I'm not going to get myself into trouble by cosplaying as Jack the Ripper where paparazzi can catch me red-fanged, and even if I do, I hereby absolve you of all responsibility. You can stop mother-henning me, you didn't turn me, you literally said no when I begged you to, its the whole reason I have eternal wrinkles instead of youthful tautness.

Louis: Not gonna let that one go, are you.

Daniel: Gimme a few centuries and ask me again. I'll let you know then.

Louis: Mmhmm. So this was....memorable and we definitely won't be doing it again. But you do seem to have things figured out so I'll leave you to it, then.

Daniel: Wait, Louis, don't go! Don't you want to hear my five-century life plan for annoying Armand into an early retirement mausoleum? I made visual aids!

Louis: Goodbye, Daniel.

Daniel: Fine, leave then! I don't care! You're not my real dad anyway! Et cetera, et cetera!

[terramythos]

Anyway here's my breakdown of the ffxiv jobs, my opinions on playing each, and the tier rank of how good their story was

TANKS

WARRIOR - warrior is so fucking funny why did they make it able to solo heal itself and the entire party in 90% of the content in the game. Raw Intuition/Bloodwhetting is so broken in dungeons its hilarious. And then they have like 3 additional healing skills on top of that. And they kept buffing it throughout Endwalker. So it is currently the easiest to play, does the most damage (i think...?), and has the best healing of any of the Tank jobs. 2nd fave probably.

Story Tier: C, it's ok, Curious Gorge is a good name. i have like nothing to say about it it's a generic AF story

PALADIN - I used to hate PLD but I think the partial rework they got halfway through Endwalker helped it a lot. It's much less clunky now. Probably still my least favorite Tank though Hallowed Ground is fun and it's pretty close to Gunbreaker for me.

Story Tier: F, this is the worst class storyline in the entire game. It's so stupid. The writing is so bad the writers acknowledge it makes no sense at all and I'm like. Yeah, thanks, I am experiencing this shit. Perhaps write a story that makes sense next time instead of pointing that out.

DARK KNIGHT - Unfortunately this is my favorite Tank 🫡 which is rough since it has the worst survivability out of any of them. But I love how you use MP and the silly number of OGCDs. The Blackest Night is such a fun ability and it's a crime that it's not a baseline skill you get from the start. Why do they have so many DRs that only cover magic damage. I must ask.

Story Tier: S, there's a reason it's the most popular and well regarded class storyline. It's really good, also the only questline I know of that uses the quest log text as part of the narrative. Outside maybe a few of the very late Endwalker quests. And, well... same writer lmao

GUNBREAKER: I think GNB looks cool as fuck and I like that it has 2 DPS rotations. The Gnashing Fang combo is so fun. Superbolide memes are always fun. My main issue with it is a skill issue because I am just constantly misaligning its burst windows.

Story Tier: C. It has some interesting lore but I found it pretty forgettable as a story.

HEALERS

WHITE MAGE: I hated White Mage for a while but something clicked and now I totally get it. I find it fun in dungeons cause you get to Holy spam and stun lock everything. As uh. The healer. That's fun. Once you get Afflatus heals (and then Afflatus Misery) it clicks. It's fun maximizing damage and playing chicken with the tank's HP.

Story Tier: B, you get a lot of lore around the Padjal, and I think the Stormblood story where you find a padjal living in hiding with her mother is pretty good! Also it's not technically the job storyline but there's a WHM side quest to get a unicorn mount? i guess it's technically a CNJ quest but same diff. no one else gets that shit. so that's cool

SCHOLAR: probably my least favorite of the healers... it just feels super clunky. You can tell a bunch of different design philosophies went into it over the years and none of them mesh very well. They've made it so the Fairy Gauge controls literally one spell. Why have the gauge at all? It's also a huge missed opportunity that there's no tie in or interaction with the fae in Shadowbringers. I love the idea of a battle tactician healer but I think it needs a rework.

Story Tier: B+, I liked the characters and its the main way to get backstory and lore on what happened with Nym.

ASTROLOGIAN: While I think AST has a similar issue to SCH (lots of different design philosophies over the years) I find it way more fun to play. I like the card mechanic and how it interacts with the rest of the party. AST is basically the only job that has its own like. Minigame? As part of its rotation. And I know a lot of people don't like the RNG for it but personally I find it fun. I know AST is getting a redesign in Dawntrail so hope it's good.

Story Tier: C? I think? I'll be honest I don't remember it super well but I didn't find anything objectionable about it. And I like the tarot aesthetic and lore and how it's healing based on manipulating luck.

SAGE: I think SGE is tons of fun, I'm not sure if I like it or WHM more. I love all the skills SGE has for preventing damage and the gimmick where your DPS heals someone in the party. Visually the hi-tech laser shooting healer is a lot of fun. IT HAS A GAP CLOSER. The only thing i wish was it wasn't so MP negative and that it did more damage. It's a little sad its DPS output is so low compared to the other healers (even AST when you factor in how it buffs the party). Since SGE is supposed to be a healer that heals through damage it's silly its damage kinda sucks.

Story Tier: A, I loved this storyline. Both the Endwalker job stories are very self contained and interesting. While the twist is pretty obvious it's still an interesting exploration of uh. Scientific ethics. Yeah

PHYSICAL MELEE DPS

MONK: I've probably played MNK the least of the phys melee but I like the whole adaptable combo thing. Not much else to say since I have played it so little. Might bring it back out and try again. It DID have the funniest guide in the Balance discord for a while.

Story Tier: D. I think? I remember thinking it was dumb, lmao. Sorry.

DRAGOON: MAN I wished I liked DRG more. It looks so fucking cool and I like how it interacts with the dragon lore. But I find it very punishing to play. To do good damage you have to align so many different cooldowns... and snapshot your DOT correctly... and screwing one thing up just fucks your DPS output forever. Like AST I believe this is being reworked in Dawntrail so I hope it feels better to play.

Story Tier: C+. I think it starts strong since you get to meet Estinien pre-Heavensward and it melds nicely with that story. But I found it pretty directionless post-HW which is a shame.

NINJA: I remember finding this one fun. I like that there are different combos you do that have varied finishers depending on the situation. I am just... bad at remembering which combo to use to get which finisher, lol. So I haven't played it as much. NIN gets a lot of flavor other jobs don't get with their unique run and jump animations. And you get a Bunny of Shame on your head if you fuck up a combo, which is incredible.

Story Tier: A. The Rogue story is probably the most memorable of the basic class quests. Ninja just has great characters and a fun story. What is with that one guy. Karasu? If you know you know. I also like how the Rogue characters show up later in the Ninja story. That's fun.

SAMURAI: I had a similar experience to WHM here because I initially hated it then really came around once it clicked. SAM seems very complex, it has a ton of buttons and different combos. But it is actually quite intuitive once you figure out the general pattern. And it does INSANE damage. I think it's the highest DPS output in the game? I love building the combos and then doing a huge finisher for a bajillion damage. The guaranteed crits and constant OGCD weaves make me feel unstoppable. I think this is tied with RPR for me.

Story Tier: B+. I found the exiled samurai character and his journey toward redemption very compelling. I won't spoil beyond that. However it does fall apart a little in the second half. Still fun but not as good.

REAPER: I love RPR, the teleportation is a lot of fun, and I love finally unleashing the demon form and going ham on the enemy. The weapons are the coolest looking in the game. Every scythe design hits. I probably played this the most in Endwalker. My main critique is the Death's Design mechanic. I hate having to keep a stupid debuff on the target to do damage. It's like a dot but without the optimized snapshotting. If they want to keep this idea i think it would feel better to change it into something like SGE's Kardia where you apply it to one enemy to do increased damage to it without having to worry about reapplying it. not sure how they would balance this for aoe but that's not my job. But even with that caveat I still really enjoy the job.

Story Tier: A+. While it doesn't reach the highs of DRK's story it comes close. I love the badass old lady main character. Her hunting a voidsent that possessed her grandfather would be cool enough but making her a Garlean exile in hiding who grudgingly agrees to train you just adds an extra cool factor. I really enjoyed this story. As a bonus theres a lot of incidental dialogue in the post-6.0 Endwalker story if you completed the RPR story because it ties in a lot.

PHYSICAL RANGED DPS

BARD: It's a bit clunky, its got some outdated design elements, it has one of the lowest damage outputs in the game... and i LOVE IT. this was technically the first job I ever played? totally different character like 8 years ago. and i was so so bad. I think i am actually pretty good at current BRD. the animations look cool. i like that it's a class you really need to work for and optimize to eke out that last bit of damage. and boosting everyone else's damage by existing is kinda neat.

Story Tier: B. I'll be real I barely remember this but I do remember it was gay as fuck so immediately gets an extra tier for that.

MACHINIST: MCH is really funny right now because like. It's phys ranged, right. The design behind phys ranged is you have 100% uptime cause you can freely move around and not have to worry about cast timers or melee range or anything. So the trade off is that they do less damage than other classes. Endwalker MCH did not get the memo and does insane damage anyway. My controversial opinion is that it has similar burst DPS to RPR. No i will not elaborate. I'm also bad at doing good damage on MCH which is impressive since it is easy.

Story Tier: B+. Some Ishgard noble's gay son wants to build machines instead of killing dragons the good old fashioned way and has to prove himself to get taken seriously. A tale as old as time. See I haven't done this quest in like years but I still remember it. He is a memorable character. It's just not like. knockout wowza compared to the A tier stories.

DANCER: Dancer is the second easiest DPS job in the game behind SMN. So if i am sleepy it's the one I like playing. You play simon says. you do a lot of damage when you play simon says then do almost no fucking damage otherwise. I think it's the lowest direct damage in the game? for a dps i mean. You have high stakes sexual tension with a DPS of your choice via Dance Partner. I wish other DNC players knew how Dance Partner works. YOU CAN DANCE PARTNER ANOTHER DANCER. THE BUFF STACKS. BUT YOU CANNOT DANCE PARTNER THE SAME PLAYER AS ANOTHER DANCER. THOSE BUFFS DO NOT STACK. ok i'm good. anyway

Story Tier: C. there's some shit about negative emotions and purging them? in theory i think this has some interesting implications with Endwalker lore considering Dynamis and its role in the story. Very similar mechanically to what's going on with the DNC story. but i really don't think the writers made the connection so it's like pure speculation and not the actual story. It's meh. fine i guess. i did like all the flashy dancing sequences.

MAGICAL RANGED DPS

BLACK MAGE: I am so so so so so so so bad at BLM. i pull up the guide. i read the guide. it all makes perfect sense. i go into a dungeon or trial or something. somehow i always get like Zeromus or some shit. and i drop Enochian or something and everything goes to shit and i'm yelling and i'm not even like slide casting or teleporting or anything i just run around crying. then i remember i have like 10 more buttons i haven't been pressing and oh god the dot fell off. people play this? for fun? i admire it. apparently they do a ton of damage if you can play it. could not be me.

Story Tier: B? There's some voidsent and Thirteenth lore. all the black mage characters are Lalafell because it's funny i guess. OH YEAH it has like the one named male Keeper of the Moon Miqo'te NPC in the entire game and he's fun. look at this twink:

sorry i don't have anything to say about BLM i am bad at it

SUMMONER: easiest DPS job in the entire game. they redesigned it for Endwalker so it is practically a new job. i have no idea how it played before. but it is super streamlined. maybe too streamlined? it's another one to play if you want to turn your brain off. i like that at 90 you summon The Actual Primals instead of little representations of them. and i like the way your burst phase switches between Bahamut and Phoenix. it all looks very cool. they should add Leviathan as a summon in Dawntrail.

Story Tier: C.. i don't remember a single thing about this questline except you interact with Y'shtola's half sister. i think you go to Cartenau at some point. idk

RED MAGE: RDM is one of those jobs that looks really complicated when you start then you actually play it and it is just super super easy. that being said i think it's really fun. I like balancing the white and black magic gauges. Dualcast is a great gimmick and it feels cool to lob two big spells in a row at something. Dualcast Verraising a chain of dead players is so fucking funny. it's a shame that the existence of Verraise means RDM does shit damage to compensate for its utility. It and DNC just sit at the bottom with BRD barely scratching ahead of them. i think? i don't remember LOL

Story Tier: A, I really like the story and characters. I like that you have a middle-age world weary catboy (catman) as your mentor. and i like that he canonically trained Alisaie too and you chat a little about that. it's a fun story!

BLUE MAGE: what the fuck is a blue mage

Story Tier: ???

[fortunatelyenchantingtaco]

Its funny cause technically its not like Gojo even has a God Complex. Like yeah you can think that but also thats the dude who can teleport and level cities. His birth altered fhe world. For all intents and purposes he is the God

Every time you think “oh no one’s gonna know about it im not that important” and you just ignore something? Yeah Gojo cant do that actually. The only thing ever that he tried to keep for himself were his feelings for Geto and even that was used against him

Like damn, imagine what hell it is to live while literally all your actions have worldwide consequences. Oh you wanted to go take a shit? This is so sad, while you were shitting a dozen of people died on the other side of the country. Yeah, your fault, should have teleported there immediately

I would go insane if i were him actually

[dozyisdead]

The RB16 was actually considered as one of the fastest cars on the grid in 2020, only behind *maybe* the Mercedes despite looking rocky at the beginning of the season. I found a little snippet of what Max said about the car:

Max and Alex both have the same preference of oversteer, but it's on different levels for them.

Look on this chart where Alex is more towards the N (neutral) while Max is more to the extreme side of oversteer! Alex has said before that some of the main reason why he had such a hard time in the car was because of the media attention and not having enough experience after being brought up so soon from Toro Rosso (doesn't that sound like a certain American currently in Williams...). He also was getting updates way later than Max, which while normal, definitely didn't help his case. I definitely do think though that if Alex got another year, he definitely could have done well!

Don't take me for sure on this, but I've seen people say that the more extreme you are in preference, the "faster" you'll be. It makes sense, but if you see Lewis on that chart, that claim seems rather stupid.

I honestly have no idea how good the Williams actually is. From our POV, it obviously looks slow and hard to drive (Logan's hands during some of these corners....) but I would say it's hard to tell how actually bad it is. For all we know, its a decent car that looks worse than it is because of that extra weight. Going back to Alex, I think that media pressure Logan's been getting is what's hurting him so much. I think he's scared to push the car, which is a reason why he's crashing so much.

To be frank, I know little to nothing about how drivers configure their set ups/cars, but I do agree that Logan has been massively improving since last year. He's definitely been crashing less, and that weight he put on during the beginning on the year seems to be doing well for him! I'm actually really excited to see if Logan will be able to start matching Alex by the end of the year in terms of pace/ points (?). I think some weight will finally be lifted off him not that he knows he's not fighting for his seat anymore.

I think it's kinda funny how so many teams have drivers that like opposite things. In Ferrari we had Charles (oversteer) and Carlos (understeer) and in Red bull we have Max (oversteer) and Checo (understeer). Carlos though, has shown that he can drive cars that don't exactly suit his preference. I'm pretty sure (I'm saying this because it's a struggle to keep up with Ferrari sometimes) that the car is more suited towards Charles this year and in 2021 (why some Ferrari fans said that the 2021 car was so "good") and both years Carlos has preformed very well. I'm pretty sure the Ferrari is also more closer to neutral than way too oversteery though (?). I don't know what Williams is cooking up, but their car has been more oversteer prone in the past few years.

Funny enough though, both Lance and Latifi (though he liked a more neutral setup) both prefere (d) a slightly more understeer car! George on the other hand, likes a more oversteery car.

Oh my god I love you (/p)

So we all agree the way that Alex was brought up through Red Bull was an absolute shit show and messed up what could have been an incredible entrance into F1? But it's really interesting how much a difference they have with how they like the cars set up! But actually, noticing that Max was on an extreme makes a lot of sense. Line I've said before, I am absolutely brain dead when it comes to the technical aspects of F1, but I notice things when it comes to how things react to their environments. I've seen the way the cars move as they go through turns and down straights, and Max really is on an extreme! And I saw it a bit with Fernando's older races before Alpine and Aston Martin, but I do see it with him in Aston right now. And Lewis too, I can see the difference in both driving styles and how the car handles certain areas in certain tracks compared to the Red Bull that Max drives in those same areas. And I know part of that has to do with how the cars are made differently, but there are still differences that can't be explained with that. Also, the fact that Alex is very neutral leaning makes a lot of sense, especially if you rewatch his overtake in Canada from this year! I really don't know how to explain it, but that moment shows it very well.

Yes, I think we don't have a huge well of knowledge on the status of each car because it's really relative to each driver, though I do agree with the bit about the corners from Logan's POV. It seemed so unwieldly! Like, my grandfather has an old while truck, it's one of the ones with a bench seat in the front, and it really is very old. I learned to initially drive in it, and it is so hard to deal with now compared to my parent's cars, which is what I'm learning to drive now (I'm a very late learner so it's just harder for me in general). I think it would be very interesting to have every driver on the grid try each other team's cars with the most basic configuration. I think that would be an amazing comparison!

Also, I'm so glad someone else noticed how much the pressure made logan so hesitant while driving! I heard a driver once say that hesitation on track was a one-way ticket to a crash or going off, so I agree with your point about his performance being affected by that pressure! Oh, and I am also so glad someone noticed the weight gain! It really shocked me how skinny Logan always seemed to be, and honestly, I was a bit concerned for a bit. I think there's a video on the Williams channel that is focused on Logan, and he mentions that he needed to focus on controlling how much he weighed because he was actually too skinny/underweight, and it could have affected his performance! Don't quote me on that, but it's either one of his training camp videos or is the team torque episode with him and his new trainer (Elias) and a football player. I think the weight he put on is great for him and I'm actually so happy! And as much as I hate to see it, I'm also thinking that part of his improvement is knowing he's basically out of the running for a seat and he's relieved he doesn't have to fight for one anymore. He knows he just has to give what is left his all, and he's willing to do that! I do really hope that he joins Prema in IndyCar, particularly because I can actually afford Indy tickets lol!

But I also agree that it's really funny that we see so many opposites within teams in regard to over vs. under steer preference! And now that we see that Williams has been more oversteer leaning, and we see that both Lance and Latifi prefer a more understeer leaning set up, it kind of explains their limited success at Williams, and why George did so well! We all know George put so much into Williams, and I am glad that it did him so well. It's going to be very interesting next year when we see how Carlos does, if Williams keeps on the oversteer leaning path!

You have been a delight to talk with and I am so glad you could give me so much information!

[system-architect]

ok here's my collected JW thoughts in general. obviously this is spoilers

OK.................................... so i think anet is Back. its not quite "we are SO back" levels but it COULD be "we are SO back" levels depending on what they do in the next installment

they did good, though, and i think the most obvious jump in quality is actually in the maps themselves. they feel so much better than soto maps just to run around in and explore. theres a LOT more detail and they actually feel pretty intriguing and immersive with a lot of fun easter eggs and surprises!

the story didnt always hit for me but it was still overall Better than soto. the first instance alone grabbed me more than all of soto had tbh. the bears don't personally interest me but the mursaat do, and we're getting somewhere with all the bloodstone and titan stuff

i DO enjoy the angle of the commander starting to go kind of lie-lie man acting in personal interests. isgarren is a bitch but we can also be rude to waiting sorrow for no reason oops sorry nice again haha oh man how'd this bear teleport here that's craaazy.. there were points at which i actively lost track of who we had lied to about what and when, and while the confusion grated me a bit it was also funny in a way? like yeah if i was the commander i'd lose track of this shit too right

the commander doesn't have much of a personality technically, beyond "person who does good(TM) things", and what we make of our canon commander's personality is mostly just our own notions and conceptions and interpretations being placed on them, BUT that said it felt like the story did take the commander in some interesting directions for me.

i felt like i got the sense that the commander really is sort of a "free agent" now, which is fun. when you've already killed all the dragons and your life's purpose is TECHNICALLLLYYY over but you're still around and you're still many things to many people, what do you do with your life? this, apparently.

i like us being kind of a mirror of isgarren in the sense that the comm is an ultra powerful guy, with a lot of worldly+scholarly experience at this point, who a lot of other very powerful figures respect and Need, but that not everyone necessarily Likes. yeah this is our free-range deployable killing machine politician who's kind of strange interpersonally.

my favorite instance in the whole story was the one with the bloodstone ghosts btw. i thought they did a really good job imbuing each with a fair amount of personality and showcasing a wide array of perspectives on what happened in gavril-- a thing which i was prepared to not be particularly interested in tbh, and yet...

ALSO, the voice actor for the gavril citizen ghost was SUPER good! i'm pretty sure they were a new VA but i'd really love to hear more voicework from them. in general i felt a lot of the VA work in this xpac banged-- it feels like they got a decent amount of new/fresh talent?? it's been nice, i hadn't realized how stale the world was starting to feel only hearing the same 3-5 voices constantly (no shade towards the longer-standing VAs who DO do a good job, i just wished for more variety)

REALLY liking the amount of unique voice lines and racial dialogue also

features wise its also been pretty good! i like the repeat renown heart thing plus the return of the hearts. as a revenant with a condi set i cant say ive got any issues with the spears LOL. and warclaw is super fun once you get the hang of it-- i like that it has a learning curve and some nuance like most older mounts do, as opposed to skyscale's fairly 'flat' mobility. have NOT really tried out decorating my homestead yet and ive heard mixed opinions on it, so we'll see how i feel there!

[aliveinacoffin]

Okokokokok, i haven’t asked for a fic in years but could you do a Miguel x Reader where the reader is a spider person who is also physicist from a different universe and it’s like late night coffee talks with miguel in the society.

Raaaaaaaaah i feel like miguel just has such a fucked up sleep schedule, so i think it’d be cute to have someone join him :)

omg yes ofcc this seems so soft wwefhaehjafh you guys mak me mentally ill, you also make me do research like a NERD because I know next to nothing about atoms n nerd shit /lh /j

Coffee For Us

Honestly, running into your scary ass boss at nearly three in the morning almost made you shit bricks, but the second? The third? It almost seemed like he was doing it on purpose.

TW!:none, other than some fluff :)

Divider credits to @cafekitsune!

Requests are still open!!!

You sighed, perching your glasses on top of your head. The only sound that filled the pristine white room was the coffee maker, the steady pour of its hot contents filling you with a familiar peace. You rubbed your eyes hard, black vision filling with stars. You missed your spider senses going off, that familiar tingling in your head ignored. You opened your eyes, blinded by bright artificial blue and blood red filling your sights. The colors made your head swim, and you stumbled back. Gaining your vision back, you were greeted by the sight of the man who was technically your boss, even if he didn't pay you. You flustered immediately, face heating up and snapping wide awake.

"Jesus, I didn't see you there." You sighed, clutching a hand over your heart.

"Sorry." He sighed, rustling through the white cupboards for something.

"It's fine, just late-night jitters you know." You laughed awkwardly, rubbing your arm as you watched him. You knew he worked odd hours, often working overtime more often than not. It was obvious now too, deep eyebags and unshaven stubble on his tanned skin on his face.

"Sure." The coffee pot stopped, signifying it was done creating what it was designed for. You poured yourself a hearty cup, in preparation for the long night ahead of you. You were trying to see if you could create teleportation, because if a man could create cross-dimensional portals then god damn you could create teleportation, atoms be damned. 

Miguel watched you with tired eyes, holding a bright neon pink coffee cup that said ‘IT’S MY GODDAMN BIRTHDAY BITCH!’ in bold black lettering. You snickered while pouring his mug.

“Good choice Sir.” You eyed the cup, before looking back up at him. When you turned away to put the pot back in its place, Miguel took a glance down, sighing when he realized the cup he had picked.

“I don’t know why these cups are even in here.” He sighed, bringing up the drink to his plump lips.

“I think they’re funny.” You shrugged, sipping your cup as well. “Plus, there’s worse ones in there, I’m sure.” You shrugged, looking sound the dark room. After hours, a lot of the lights in the Spider Society were kept off manually to be turned on when needed. When sunrise hit, all the lights would flick on, illuminating the white castle.

“Oh, I don’t doubt that, pinche menso’s can't take anything seriously.” Miguel shook his head, ruffling his peppered hair. His messy hair only looking messier, but it didn’t look unattractive. You looked away, trying not to think such thoughts about your boss.

“I think it’s funny, you shouldn’t take everything so seriously, that doesn’t sound fun at all.” You shook your head, smiling softly as to show you meant no offense.

Miguel snorted in response, turning around to sulk somewhere else. You shrugged, walking your own way back to your workstation. 

A couple of days later, you found yourself in the same situation, seeking out a late-night cup of coffee after a session of going nowhere. Back in the breakroom closest to you, you grabbed an apple and shoved it in your pocket as you started a new pot of coffee.

“That didn’t seem like a bad pot. What a waste.” A voice sighed from behind you, and turned around, relaxing when you saw it was Miguel.

“It was cold and sitting you for god knows how long.” You sniffed, pushing your glasses up the bridge of your nose.

“You’ve never heard of a microwave?” Miguel shook his head, blindly reaching out to grab another cup.

“Gross, absolutely disgusting.” You laughed slightly, shaking your head as you gave him an incredulous look. He merely shrugged, leaning on the white counter as he listened to the rhythmic drip drip drip of the coffee. You saw his eyes wander to the bulge in your lab coat, and you grabbed the apple, showing it off to him.

“It’s not good for you to eat so late.” He reprimanded, shaking his head.

“It’s not for eating,” You shook your head, tossing the fruit in the air and catching it in one swift movement. “It’s for experimenting.” You smirked, putting it back in your large pocket and shuffling around your other pocket to fish out a pen and notebook.

“Experimenting what?” Miguel asked because even as smart and involved with the society as he was, he couldn’t be involved with every experiment and test the spiders did.

“Teleportation!” You smiled, opening your notebook to him, and he tried to read over your crazy writing and decipher your excited doodles.

“I already did that.” He was hunched over, arms crossed while he leaned over the desk to read your writing. His eyes flicked up to you, bright red irises watching your reaction.

You rolled your eyes, uncrossing your own arms to let them fall uselessly at your side.

“Dimensional teleportation. That’s super long and not exactly easily done. What I want is to make it as quick as a button, to teleport from one side.” You sidestepped, only moving a couple of feet to the right of you. “To the other.”

He hummed, raising his eyebrows as he leaned up back to his full terrifying height. 

“Well, good luck with that. I had an AI to help me with the goober, I can’t imagine how long it will take on your own.” The coffee pot was now half full.

“It’s actually going surprisingly well. At first, I tried doing cool like, disappearing effect thing, since it looked cooler and it was like a video game, but then it opened up a whole new world of questions. What would happen to your body? Was a new one being created? What would happen to one’s memories? So now I’m trying to make it sort of like a door. Where I infuse the technology with the watch, to make it easier for us to carry around. As to the how I’m still trying to work out the kinks, for now, I can open a two-way portal. Like walking through a blanket to another place. But anything I open the ‘door’ dies on its way out. I’ve turned like, ten apples to mush at this point, and if I’m going to be honest, it’s driving me insane.” You laughed, catching your breath after your long and nonsensical rant.

At this point, the coffee pot was full, and Miguel was pouring himself a cup of the hot liquid. Still, despite your slightly crazed rambling, he was attentive paying attention. He poured your empty cup, making unbroken eye contact with you. 

“Sounds interesting, I could help you out one day if you don’t mind.” He shrugged, pushing himself off the counter. He stayed still, staring you down while you blushed.

“I-if you want to! I don’t mind at all.” Your eyes flickered down to look anywhere else but his handsome face, and you found yourself deliriously laughing at his choice of cup. Miguel looked down, sighing in defeat at the sight. 

It as a plain white cup, with the words “Slap my ass like a drum papi’ on it.

“Seriously, when will they grow up.” He sighed, taking a sip on his way out. 

“Hopefully ever!” You called out, leaving the opposite way as him t continue your adventure.

You were so close, you just knew it. The next night, you found yourself in the same position as yesterday. Making a cup of coffee late at night. This time, you had simply taken the whole fruit bowl, not wanting to waste another moment of your precious time. The teleporter was slowly but surely coming together. After months of pouring blood, sweat, and tears into the project, you knew you were on the verge of a breakthrough. 

“Are you still working on your teleporter?” Miguel's familiar voice rumbled from behind you, but you didn’t bother to look up from your notebook. You had set up your phone in a way so that you could continue your nonsensical notes, hand moving faster than lighting as you jotted down whatever was in your mind.

“I never stopped working.” You rasped, the sound of your voice evidence of your exhaustion.

“Oh.” He sounded taken aback. “Why not? You need as much rest as you can to be at one hundred percent.” Hypocrite.

“I’m so close, I can feel it.” You shook your head, rocking on the balls of your feet as excitement shot through you.

“How?” He asked, and you could hear the click! of cups as he searched for a coffee mug.

“I don’t know.” You shrugged shaking your head. “Spider-sense?” You twitched your nose as you started a new sketch, a diagram of how to fully complete the damn thing.

“That’s stupid.” He deadpanned, and you looked up, back cracking as you fully stood up straight.

“You’re just jealous you don’t have any.” You stuck your tongue out, flexing your stiff fingers. He raised his eyebrows at that, and let out a small chuckle.

“Sure, we’ll go with that.” He rolled his eyes, crouching down to fish out a snack from the bottom drawer.

You shrugged, going back to review what you had just written down. You heard the cabinet shut, and shuffling to the side of you, bu you paid no mind.

“That’s wrong.” A blue finger popped into view, tapping on one of the equations you had put down.

“What? How?” You looked up at Miguel. Not backing out where he had stepped into your space. You always thought he would be cold, his suit would probably suck up any warmth he emitted. But in actuality, he was very warm. He wasn’t swelteringly hot, instead, he was cozy warm, like a calm camp fire. He smelt like expensive cologne and slightly of sweat, but somehow the two scents intermingled into a pleasant musk. Like a worn shirt that could be washed, but didn’t need to be.

“You carried the X when you should’ve solved for it, then multiplied the answer when you should’ve halved it.” Miguel explained, moving his finger away, but not himself. His face was uncovered from the neck up, giving you a full view of his handsome face. His fangs poked out barely from behind his lips, crooked teeth just visible.

Oh, thank you sir.” You breathed, attention split between his mouth and his gorgeous eyes.

“You don’t have to call me sir, Miguel is fine.” He breathed back, copying your movement. Neither of you moved from each other's spot. It wasn’t as if this was your first time interacting, you and Miguel have had many run in’s in the past, and he seemed to yell at you slightly less than the others. But you two hadn’t really had personal one on one time with each other, and it seemed like the more you had them, the more you two seemed to be magnetized to each other.

“Thank you, Miguel.” You cleared your throat, and the two of you stepped back, faces warming with the realization of what just happened.

“Of course.” He nodded stiffly, and the coffee pot dinged, breaking the awkward silence.

He poured you a cup first, then himself. You laughed when you saw what he grabbed this time.

It was a cup with cat girls all over it, their coverage varying from girl to girl. They all said different things, ranging from just a simple ‘Meow!’ to ‘Please pet me everywhere Nyaa~!’

“Oh my god, whose cup even is that!” you covered your mouth as you laughed.

“I have no idea, and I don’t want to know.” Miguel rolled his eyes, a deep frown on his face. His eyes flickered back to you, watching you with soft eyes as you laughed at him. You wiped away the tears in your eyes, your face hurting from the wide smile on your face.

“If you really are as close as you think you are, I’d be willing to help you.” He offered, shrugging one shoulder while he avoided eye contact.

“Hmm? Oh, yes! Please! I just know I’m almost done.” You made a pinching motion with your fingers, inching them together. He nodded, walking over to the main table and grabbing a bowl of fruit.

“Alright.” He smiled softly, letting you lead the way. “Let’s figure this out.” You both left the dark breakroom, coffee pot left mostly empty.

[yesterdaysnewts]

so i just finished the first season of house md and let me say

your attachment to wilson is understandable, that man has the biggest brownest eyes ive ever seen

house on the other hand has the scariest blue eyes known to man pls buy her brown contact lenses

i actually like cameron x house i would potentially like to see more of that she is a very nice contrast to house and i rlly want to see that dynamic explored even though the season 1 finale did make it pretty clear that hes still in love with stacey

speaking of which im looking forward to seeing how her presence in the hospital shakes things up

im very glad they got rid of vogler or whatever his name was i had vivid hallucinations of punching him in the face repeatedly everytime he was on screen

i want to find out what the deal with foreman is. he has matching shows with house. he hates homeless people. he committed a crime at 16. he broke into a patients house to figure out how to comfort her while she died. literally who is this man i need to knowwwww

that brings me to chase. i cant figure him out either, first hes a brown nose to house, then hes snitching on him every chance he gets, he doesnt need to money but he wants his job, he is somehow to coolest person in this show and the lamest, he wears a leather jecket and looks like he belongs in a pantene commerical. hes my favourite

also i want it to be actually brought up that house plays piano? like in the first season there are 4 seperate times he plays piano (tho he only mimes playing it one time so technically only three)

GOD this show i cant believe i didnt watch it sooner

wilson really does have the most wettest biggest brownest eyes i have ever seen and it makes him so scrunkly i need to put him in a bag and bash that bag into a brick wall

and yea houses eyes are fucking terrifying and the worse thing is that someone on a discord server once edited him to have brown eyes and somehow it was scarier

also you are like the first person ive seen express a like for cameron x house so honestly god speed for that but you do bring up some banging fucking points

live laugh love stacey that is really all i have to say to that her and house have such a good juicy relationship

fun fact vogler only exists because fox wanted someone to like oppose house and that so the writers threw him in and in process made chase a dickhead (still bbg tho)

also FOREMAN, god i love him so much like mans presents himself as like 'oh smart doctor, id want this man to be my doctor' but then as the show progresses you just end up looking at him like 'what happened here'. in s3 you do properly start to see how he parallels house and it is scrumptious top tier telly and, like chase, he is a fucking dickhead. and the car thing as well cos like he goes on about how he pulled himself out of that but then you watch and he clings to normalcy and making something of himself its brilliant

and the shit himself chase. i find it so fucking funny how his first name is robert like he does not fucking look like a robert. and his relationship with house like fucking hell, you can tell chase is desperately trying to separate himself from his actual dad and by doing that he clung onto his work and especially house in an attempt to do that.

also 'he wears a leather jacket and looks like he belongs in a pantene commercial. he is my favourite' speaks for itself cause yeag.

unfortunately i don't actually think its bought up that house can play piano later on but you do get to see him play other instruments which is fun cause hugh laurie is a really good musician and im so happy they gave house interests outside of just medicine

happy watching the show is gonna make you go just a bit insane