#i told my dad that i wanted to go to pride but im afraid of the homophobia

[we-will-all-be-stories]

"Homophobias not a big deal anymore" okay then why are there videos of my friends and I at our pride booth on conservative Facebook pages? If homophobia isn't a big deal, why have people recorded my queer friends and I without our consent? If homophobia isn't a big deal, why have people come into our queer spaces and shout bible verses in our faces? If homophobia isn't a big deal then why have I been called slurs by random people on the road?

[star-girl69]

Love Song

Clarisse La Rue x Fem!Demigod!Reader

—-

a/n: just needed to do some general hc’s to get all my thoughts in order i hope you all enjoy!!

Love song - Lana Del Rey

warnings: the formatting is weird idk why i can’t fix it but y’all will live, swearing, a little itty bitty bit of violence, every facet of clarisse finding its way here and i love them all, tell me if i missed anything!!

—-

i’m sure we all agree on this

but clarisse is very protective of you

even if you’re a very capable fighter, even if you’re even better than her, clarisse is still so protective of you

i mentioned this in one of my fics (maybe so it goes…????) but like the reason behind this is the fact that clarisse is just SCARED

she is terrified of losing you bc you are the only one she feels like she can be herself with

like clarisse is insane!!!!! in a good way!!!!! but also she’s a 17 year old girl…. she wants TO BE LOVED

she tries to talk to you about how she feels about her dad and about everything else in her life, but even though she doesn’t want to be, she’s locked up like a vault

she knows her emotions are always super intense and she has big reactions

major anger issues but they’ve gotten better with age

the problem is she spent her entire life being told that she needed to calm down, that she couldn’t feel like that all the time, and she just tried to shut down

obviously that did not work

but it still makes it virtually impossible to talk about her feelings

when it comes to you tho she’s an open book

she’s a daughter of ares she’s headstrong she’s proud and her fatal flaw is PRIDE

i mentioned this before but she wants everyone to know that you’re hers and she’s yours

your relationship is partly very public

she’s not afraid to touch you or kiss you

she’s not afraid to show you off and (needs to) show everyone that yes your beautiful self belongs to HER

so naturally she gets very jealous

even when you’re like clarisse you are INSANE

there’s been a few times when you first started dating and you were still getting comfortable and weren’t that public yet so like someone would flirt with you

it went like this

boy: hey what’s up you’re kinda fine

y/n: oh! oh yeah no….. no…..

clarisse: WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY IM GONNA FUCKING KILL YOU—

then she started attacking him

lost dessert privileges for a month, she proudly declared that it was worth it (besides you would sneak her bites of yours like)

now that everyone knows you’re hers her jealousy is rooted a lot more in delusion and insecurity

you’ll be like in a group talking someone and she’ll pull you closer and be like “i think that guys staring at you a little too much.”

“clarisse no the fuck he’s not what”

b/c of the fact that she isn’t a son for her father she gets insanely jealous if specifically a MAN gets even an inch too close however innocently

she doesn’t want to think it but she thinks you’ll eventually realize her father is right and she’s not as useful or good bc she’s a girl

most of the time when she gets jealous bc of her insecurities she just becomes extra clingy

but also any emotion she feels she gets extra clingy to you so sometimes it’s hard to tell LMAO

she isn’t really a big hand holder but that’s only because she’s actually holding you CLOSER to her by your waist

also one more note about your relationship publically

everyone gets whiplash bc like she’s a BULLY fo everyone else and then you walk over and she’s all heart eyes

i hate everyone but you trope save me

save me i hate everyone but you trope

THIS HAPPENED IN IN A GOOD WAY

clarisse: pushes percy over

you: nuh uh clarissseeeeeeee

clarisse: omg hi beautiful gf

you: touches her shoulder, looks at her disapprovingly

clarisse: fine i’ll go, *scares percy*, bye bye beautiful ily

like she’s just being a bitch and then all of a sudden you come around and she’s like hiiiiiii babyyyyy how is my gorgeous gorgeous girl today??

so outwardly clarisse is just very proud and touchy

privately she lets herself be a little more chill

this is where she really touchy you thought before was worse nah

idk if y’all have noticed but in my fics clar’s always holding on y/n’s hips and that’s just me self projecting bc i have the most horrid hip dips but my point still stands

SHE LOVES YOUR HIPS

would totally call them “love handles” IM SORRYY

but she just likes having a place to hold where she can just like kinda actually physically grab you with her hands

like yeah she can wrap her arms around your waist but she likes to GRAB you

cuddling w her is fun bc like this girl cannot get ENOUGH of you there’s only like three ways you cuddle

you on top of her whether just like completely on top of her (one of her favs) or just with your head on her chest

this is what happens whenever you feel scared

like there was a monster attack just near the barrier and you’ve all been feeling uneasy all day

TRUST you are sleeping in her bed tonight

wraps her arms around you so tight it’s like she’s crushing you

also she’s running your back or caressing your head whichever you prefer

she keeps her spear right next to her bed and makes sure you can see it so you know however subconsciously NOTHING can hurt you bc she’s right there (nothings gonna hurt you baby vibes)

or she’s on top of you this one usually happens when she’s feeling a little extra insecure and jealous and it’s like no one can see you if she’s on top of her so then you’re hers

she isn’t the smartest one in the bunch but she has good intentions!!!!

also she lays on top of you if you get hurt

like after so it goes for example when y/n got that little cut on her hand

you’re like “clar pls you’re crushing me”

“um ok you scared the shit out of me today tho you need to LET ME do this fuck”

third option

you’re both laying on your side and facing each other legs tangled together and she’s probably whispering to you

she’s a big whisperer i feel it in my heart

like tracing her hands on your face and saying your so beautiful or telling you how you make her feel

oh lord take me now

also she loves you the way hozier loves

“someone asked me in the end i’d tell them ‘put me back in it’ // darlin’ i would do it again // if i could hold for a minute”

“when my time comes around lay me gently in the cold dark earth no grave could hold my body down i’d crawl back to her”

like she BREATHES for you

if she died and then you were like “i miss you” trust she would find a way to come back to life

totally daydreams about going on such a fantastical quest that the gods offer both of you immortality so you can be together forever and ever and ever and ever and ever

like if the world ends y’all would still be there having a little picnic date

devotion is the only word that comes close

anyways

ok nicknames she calls you:

baby, angel, gorgeous, pretty thing/girl, beautiful, lovely, dummy (lovingly)

(recently saw a few posts abt clarisse saying mama/mamas i may be swayed)

dates she takes you on:

forces you to train w her even if you don’t like it but she lets you win OBVIIIII, under the stars in the woods, take your dinners to go and sneak back to either hers or your cabin to eat together, secret makeout sessions in the bathroom her cabin your cabin anywhere she can get her hands on you

this is so random but i get horrible migraines and i am ADDICTED to these like headache relief frequency sounds on youtube i swear they work and i was like omg you can’t have electronics at chb I WOULD NOT SURVIVE

so if you are a real one like me and get horrible migraines but this goes for being sick in general she’s like a little puppy pretending to be a wolf barely holding it together

she’ll be like at the foot of your bed begging you not to go into the light while shouting at someone at the same time to refill your water

you like have a cold

she would rub your temples if you had a headache and she would literally be like a doll for you to move around like oh you wanna lay on her chest? by all means

you wanna lay upside down with your feet in her face? as long as you get better you can do whatever you want!

you don’t wanna touch her at all? that’s where she draws the line

you’ll be like “ugh i’m hot get away from me”

“okay ☹️☹️”

“why are you touching my feet with your feet”

she places you above everyone else

like yeah other people are ok…….

but you 😍😍😍😍😍😍

this is slightly cringe but she would fr burn the whole world down and not let a flame touch you

LIKE HAVE YALL SEEN THE ANONS IVE BEEN POSTING AND THE CAPTURE THE FLAG THINGS 😱😱😱😱 (y’all always check my blog im always posting the funniest shit bc i’m funny)

“you’re one opposite teams blah blah blah you get hurt clarisse drops EVERYTHING to help you even if just a paper cut” (i have no chill fic coming soon)

THEN THEN the other one that was like “ok but what if you ACTUALLY get hurt like broken leg”

clarisse just goes crazy when you’re hurt

in so it goes: “what if that cut gets infected?”

you’re her WORLD she literally can’t stand the thought or something happening to you or else she starts literally shaking in anger and sadness

but when clarisse gets hurt it’s a whole other story

LIKE FUCK YOU JUST WANNA CARE ABOUT HER AND SHES ALL LIKE “it’s chill.”

NO ITS NOT YOURE GONNA BLEED OUT 😭😭

clarisse never let’s anyone but you see her true emotions

like yeah when you’re in public and you’re being cutesy she starts smiling and everyone is SO confused

but still

she never lets anyone see her as WEAK

so she always downplays her injuries in terms of how much they hurt, but flaunts them off proudly at the same time?? yeah that makes sense

after a capture the flag game you march her to the bathroom with a first aid kit “ok baby take off your shirt”

she always makes some flirty comment like SHUSH NOT RN

then she has all these bruises and every once in a while a cut from someone’s sword

you’re like 😔😔💔

you’re the only one she will let clean her up

unless she like breaks a bone or needs stitches (which has never happened) no way in hell she’s going to the healers

if you’re a child of apollo or smth she’s like “i literally have my own person healer right here…..”

anyways i think that’s all but i will probably be updating this when i think of more stuff bc as we know i have no chill

thank you all sm for reading and reblogging and liking and commenting and sending all of your WONDERFUL asks they make me so happy i’m always giggling when i get one

anyways bye bye 😘

—

taglist:

@lvrue @t-wylia @laughingcheese037 @kroumi @urdeadpoet @colezb @rey26 @harmzilla @elliewilliamsbae @amberfreemansburntface @kyuupidwrites @neverwaakeme-up @shark1008 @liballer @heyimadison @nvirskies @pnsteblnme

[mnovenia]

H-7 then H-5 till I meet you again 광광!!

I just feel like crying, and the song said: amugodo duryowon mara! I'm not afraid of anything that will come my way. Reflecting back since Bali Camp, so much has changed, every areas of my life seem ALIVE, CLOSER TO GOD, VERY PERSONAL, INTIMATE, FULL OF TRUST, FUN, EASY, LIGHT, NO WORRY that what I can say. And God gave me bonus by putting some sort of Godly magical romance too, that I still praying for and willing to believe and surrender to God.

And I witness how God works, He didn't stop working even when I forgot to pray about, when I think someone might not do it seriously, when I think it might just be a wishful thinking. Even now I still not sure about many thing, but one thing I sure of, my life will change forever once GwangHui comes to Bali, which is in 5 days. Really?

Hmm, I said to him today, can't believe I get to say see you soon. Well our communication is quite intense these days as we're counting down the days. Visa, my own misunderstanding, housing, phone, prayer with pastors, etc. He said: nuna im nervous, i'm going to meet Ps Paul tonight. Nuna it's 7 days left. Nuna I'll call you, Buchangnim OoOoOoOo etc.. The funniest thing is when I'm trying to ensure his room @ Tintin: out of 53rooms available there was only 1 room available 205 which next to mine (NOWAY), I asked again, ok 217 will be available on Jan 2nd, oo perfect I said, numberwise its a bit far from mine. Till I checked myself, the room is behind me -__- which means he can see all my laundries and we can have some sort of romeo & juliet relationship (sumpah ya ini impian gw dr smp bisa sbeelah2an di drama korea ky ChunYang, Business Proposal & smua yg kebetulan lainnya -___-). Trus ga lama kemudian sih ada room 223, then I think ok let's make video & make GH choose, but before I did it, someone took the room already. So I told Bella which one is better? Next to mine or behind me? She called me rightaway giggling. OMG this is just so funny.

Well I think what I know is, both me and him we're completely on the same path. We're focus on what God wants us to do in life, we don't go to the left or right but straight according to His words, what we care the most is expanding God's kingdom and be a witness of how God words, be obedient to His command even it doesn't make sense to the world, we both has dream of having Godly family but in the meantime we're working our best to fill our days with ensuring young people to be Jesus' disciples, enjoying God's grace, covenant and promises, we trust God will provide for us in job and financial, we're willing to learn each others' language/cultere/differences/age gap with respect and carefulness to not hurt and make stupid decisions. And what I'm trying to remember clearly here is: if being in relationship with him bring glory to God, if it what God wants and intend us to do, if it shapes us to become more like Jesus and selfless, if it becomes our testimony of how God works in our waiting, if we're capable to be example of building Godly family, then I know it will worth to be pursued. Not only for my own romantic fulfilment, not for filling my pride and own benefit, not because of korean syndrome, not because I want to rush thing as I get older, not because that temporary fling and childish cling, but just because of God's grace, His mercy, His will not mine, so here I state on the 2nd to last day of 2023, NOT MY WILL GOD BUT YOURS :)

And for you Gwang Hui, thank you for appear in my life, thank you for such joy and precious time we spent, for pursuing and being obedient of what God put in your heart, for listening to me and communicate with me while being careful and weird sometimes in my opinion. Thank you for showing what faith looks like in your silence but your action speak louder than any man I ever met. Since the first time to tell me about staying in bali over our trip to GL, when you told your dad when I was in Korea, when you told your relatives during chuseok time, when you handed your resignation letter, when you waited till your time to disciples your Sun is over, when you told me about your last day of work, your willingness to learn Bhs Indonesia, visa, applying to BIH, learn about choir, cafe, korean dermatologist, coming to Indonesia Service, setting up meetings with your Pastor before making any decision, your finance plan, your honesty and transparency with me, for telling me about your days, I RESPECT YOU, A LOT KIM GWANG HUI :) and I can't wait to adventure this journey, another exciting chapter in our lives that God provides, to witness together what God will do through us. May God lead us, protect us, make His will be done GREATLY through us and our ministry. I can not wait to see you again :)

[siempre-bucky]

Hey im new here! I love it your fics with Druig as a Dad!!! OmG they are sooooo god!

Could do druig as a "future" dad when the reader was giving birth to Orla? Did Druig confort the reader while she was giving birth? How he reacted when he saw Orla for the first time? Could please give us details?

Omg I can't wait for it! So excited!

Dad!Druig X Reader

Summary: headcanons of you and druig having your first born!

Warnings: mentions of childbirth (not graphic)

FIRST OF ALL: welcome my darling :') 2.... THANK YOU FOR WANTING MORE DAD!DRUIG and my little brain creation that is Orla :') tbh I've wanted to write this for a WHILE

Ajak was the one that insisted you have the baby in the US

she found a small hospital in rural South Dakota that didn't ask any questions

Druig didn't let his panic show as you went into labor

oh but he was freaking out on the inside

he went through the mental list he made rapidly as Ajak helped you to the car

he didn't feel prepared all, even after witnessing 20 generations of his people being born

"Dru! She's coming with or without you! Let's go!" You yelled through gritted teeth, a contraction hitting you as you spoke

in the hospital, he bombarded the doctor and nurses with questions about the process

grilling them on every aspect

"Honey, leave them alone," Ajak touched his shoulders and led him away from the now fearful staff

he let you hold his hand as your contractions became closer together

"Are you ok, my love?" he asked you

you pant as the pain subsided, "It hurts, but I'm ok."

you suddenly squeezed on it, making him grunt

"Sorry! sorry, sorry," you whined

"Don't be, it's a part of it," he told you through jagged breaths

the pain had gotten worse as the hours progressed

"Why isn't it working?" you cried brokenly, the epidural the nurse gave you failing

or that your pain was breaking through the influence of the medicine

"You're going to have to push soon... we've never seen this level of pain on another woman, miss," the nurse told you

it was one of the fears the three Eternals had, this wasn't going to be a normal birth

you and Druig shared a look as he read the thoughts of the huddled medical staff

they were afraid you were going to die in labor

suddenly you cried out in pain, grasping for his hand

"It's time," the doctor said, trying to keep his cool

you look up at Druig, "Do it," you told him, nodding in reassurance

it was your plan if it went south

his eyes turned shimmering gold, allowing him to take control of the situation

your pain subsided

and with 3 pushes

a baby began to cry

tears instantly formed in his fading glowing eyes

he didn't imagine himself as one of those fathers that cried

but here he was, sitting next to you, the tiny baby on your chest

"What are you going to name her?" a teary-eyed Ajak asked from the corner

his nervously touched his daughter's soft cheek, "Orla," he told her happily

that night as you slept and with Ajak gone to tend to the ranch, Druig stood by the window, the cool night air radiating off the window

his newborn wrapped in a soft pink blanket, her soft snores coming from the nose he already saw looking like his

she fit perfectly in his arm

he used his free hand to stroke her face with his pointer finger carefully, trying not to disturb her slumber

but the little one's eyes slowly opened, looking up at him

he forced back a sob

this was the first time she truly looked at him

"My beautiful, beautiful Orla," he whispered, another round of prideful tears forming in his blue eyes

[han-and-kai]

im just gonna vent in the tags a bit

[legends-live-in-memories]

First Friend

AYO im back with biodad!bruce wayne day 2! lets see how long i keep going

Maribat Masterlist  AO3  @maribat-bdbwm 

Day 1

Word count: 1.2k words

Summary:

“You’re rude.”

It was just two words. Two very simple, honest words but they were enough to send the blonde eleven year old girl into hysterics.

The story on how 11-year-old Marinette made her first friend

BD!Bruce Wayne Day 2- Family/Friends

without further ado:

“You’re rude.”

It was just two words. Two very simple, honest words but they were enough to send the blonde eleven year old girl into hysterics. She was going on some tirade about her father and how he would never allow Marinette to talk about her like that. It made little sense to her because her maman had always told her to speak about her feelings openly. Hiding how she felt about someone who she was not actively trying to deceive was a waste of energy, her maman had explained. Marinette wholeheartedly agreed. Just imagining trying to keep the blonde girl happy at all times added ten pounds of weight to her shoulders. Her heart went out to the little redhead trying to do just that. Was that what friends do?

Marinette’s never had friends before. She was the only child in her village. The Guardians, she had learned, lived longer than their peers so they chose to live in seclusion, away from anything that could corrupt their world view or challenge them. They recruited in secret, always older people, people who have seen the world and wished to correct it. Marinette, being born into the way of the Order of the Guardians, knew very little of society. The elders sought to correct that. First, she was introduced to her father—who she discovered was a bit of a recluse despite living and protecting a heavily populated city—then the elders decided that she would live in one of the cultural centers of the world. Paris, France; home to a little over two million people and a hot spot for tourists. No better place to learn about the world than somewhere that has entertained the rest of the world.

She had been enrolled in school and was introduced to almost a dozen children her age. She memorized their names and faces and whatever random information she gathered from observation. A short blonde girl named Rose loved to collect bugs but the boy named Max hated them. He liked something called video games, Marinette noted to ask her parents about that later. The other blonde girl in her class, a girl named Chloé, was the daughter of the mayor and she liked to make sure everyone remembered. Everyone. She was also a brat and loud and rude and Marinette was rather upfront when she told her such. Which led to her current situation.

“You’re rude,” she had said. She was standing in front of a shy girl with pretty locs, Mylène, blocking her from Chloé’s view.

“I’m not rude!” the blonde shrieked. “I was just telling her that her headband was ugly and it belonged in the trash where she found it!”

“It doesn’t matter where she got it,” Marinette didn’t think she found it in the trash but people were weird and she didn’t want to be wrong just in case. Regardless it was still a cute pink headband with flowers. “You don’t get to call people’s things ugly.”

“And who are you to tell me what I can and can’t do?” Chloé had crossed her arms and was pouting and not even looking at them anymore. Marinette felt hot frustration boil under her skin. She didn’t like how the girl wouldn’t even look at them. “My daddy’s the mayor and I can do whatever I want!”

Who cared who her father was? That didn’t mean she got to do whatever she wanted whenever she wanted. If that were the case then Marinette was untouchable. Her frustration grew and she had no control over herself anymore. Her small body could only hold so much anger and, despite her teachers’ best efforts, she inherited her papa’s quick temper. The words were out and Marinette regretted them before she could stop herself from saying them.

“Well, my dad is Batman!”

Silence.

No one spoke and Marinette was already beating herself up for the misstep. She shouldn’t have said that! That was classified information and she shouldn’t be using her family’s business to win petty arguments. That would make her no better than Chloé. How could she fix this? She had to fix this.

“Yeah and my dad’s Superman!” yelled a new voice. Kim, this tall kid from another class, had joined in the argument. He stood slightly off to the side, drowning in a big red hoodie with his chest puffed out and posing.

“My mom is Wonder Woman!”

“My uncle is the Flash!”

One by one more of her classmates started to shout out how they were ‘related’ to various members of the Justice League until all that could be heard was a cacophony of names and laughter.

“Ugh, whatever, Dupain-Cheng,” Chloé huffed and stomped in place but her voice could barely be heard over the other children. Marinette watched as she realised she was being ignored before grabbing the redheaded girl and pulling away from the crowd.

“Umm, thank you,” Marinette heard a voice directly behind her ear, as timid as a mouse. She turned to face the girl she was protecting, Mylène, and offered her her best attempt at a reassuring smile. “You didn’t have to stand up for me like that but I’m glad you did.”

“Of course, I really like your headband so I didn’t want what Chloé said to get to you.”

“You really like it?” Marinette watched as she slowly, almost afraid to touch it, reached for her headband. The wonder in her eyes made pride in Marinette’s tiny frame. She did the right thing standing up for her!

“Yes! I really do!”

“Thank you, do you,” the girl paused and squared her shoulders, looking Marinette intently with a furrow to her brows, “do you want to be friends with me?”

Friends? Marinette has never made a friend before. Is that what the Guardians wanted from her by sending her here? Friends meant trust but she was a Guardian in training. That meant she would have to keep secrets. Could she do that? Keep such secrets from a friend? Did she want friends? What would her father do? Did Batman have friends? Did she want to be like Batman? Before an answer to any of those questions could come to her, Mylène spoke out again.

“It’s okay if you don’t,” she tried to reassure Marinette but by the look in her eyes, the cloudiness and the slight red tint, Marinette knew that her lack of an answer deeply hurt the girl.

“No! I do want to be friends!” She was quick to quell the other girl’s worries, not wanting to form any misunderstandings. It appears they both could need a friend. Even though she had never accounted for them in the Guardians’ plans for her, Marinette believed friends were exactly what she needed. And the Justice League were Batman’s friends so it was obviously the right choice.

She would need to discuss with her mother going forward but she still did well today. She was honest, stood up for someone and even though she accidentally outed her father, nothing bad happened. She just needed to be more cautious next time, to be more level-headed. There was no harm, no foul.

Besides, having friends never hurt anybody, right?

[icecreamkink]

watched all of the untamed / cql in two weeks after my friend 1 told me abt mdzs a hundred years ago and my friends 2 and 3 tried to get me into cql for like two whole years and there are.

feelings.

very first scene is a very dramatic death in the middle of nightmare battle on sith planet land . i will forget abt it in the next tenish episodes and then will be very surprised when it becomes Extremely Painful

anyway magic flying gays and possession and human sacrifice! we are off to a great start

in retrospect, chaos goblin wei wuxian must have had a blast pretending to be so cRaZy and be as disruptive as he could as mo xuanyu lbr

listen. why is fire always evil coded. cant a magic clan wear red, black and orange and have flame motif while being wholesome?

For Legal Reasons These Are Not Zombies

i wish the politics of the sect were a bit clearer, especially at the beggining when the wen clan had sm power, was wen ruohan the chief cultivator? is that why they were so slow in responding to the attacks? im v confused by the pre yiling patriarch politics

fighting in the roof by the moonlight as way of flirtiiiiiiing. as i understand this is a wuxia/xianxia trope and honestly...... thank u for ur service

slight bullying and being a nuisance in general, as a way of flirting we love to see it

wwx: if i drink on the rooftop, thats not inside the cloud recesses! hmmm check and mate :D lwj: i will fuck u up so help me god   wwx: :0

i lov them

through hell or high water (quite literally) wei wuxian rem ains a trashfire gremlin till the end and i love him with my whole heart

in the pt subs wei wuxian calls jiang cheng a stubborn duck and i dearly wish that had come back

my opinions on almost every character goes from love to hate u - Hmm Me Like U - BABY. ILY. and i am Very Pleased w that. its been a while since i loved such a complete cast so much i think

no really. i WONT go into a detailed rant abt what i love about each of these characters and each of their relationships to each other. but i COULD. 

some lan disciples in the loudest whisper ever: YEAH THATS THE JIN BASTARD MENG YAO HEARD THE GOT SUPER HUMILIATED BY HIS DAD LOL SURE HOPE HE DOESNT TAKE SLIGHTS TO HIS CHARACTER TO HEART

lan xichen, immediately: i must Love him 

being into problematic ppl is in the Lan genetics, we come to realize

wen qing deserves so many awards for so many things but not snapping and just stabbing wen chao is at the top 

that scene at lan qirens class where wwx talks about using resentful energy to fight a violent spirit. exquisite.

 It establishes Good Student lan wangji, wei wuxian as curious and questioning and not afraid of taboo,  lwj sees that wwx is not, in fact, a dumb ass hes just a Dumbass,  shows us the audience (esp. a western audience) how shocking the idea of disrupting the dead/dying and controlling resentful energy actually is,  the theoretical foreshadow arguing, everyone else like ‘shUT UP’,  “and how could you ensure that the resentful energy would obey you and not hurt other?” “well i havent thought that far” and of course, lan qiren just straight up lobbing a hard object at wwx head,. chefs kiss

fellas is it gay to bother the hot rule obessessed nerd from ur school and make drawings of him with flowers in his hair and then hide gay porn in his book to antagonize him and ask him to hold ur hand and be ur friend and talk to him all the time and get him drunk and give him bunnies bc you know he likes them and give him a lantern and always want his attention and dedicate yourself to getting him to smile-

and after all of that wwx rly said oh i Admire him, aksd like yeah we all were there in high school buddy

i have Learned. caves = gay.

 accidental marriage +beint physically tied together with the sacred married ribbon+ gay panic+foreshadowing+bunnies! in the cave (1)

the story abt lan yi and baoshan sanren tho. i would like to see it

early days wen bros pull my heart strings like a guqin 

EVERYTHING about the lantern scene; disaster hets jiang yanli and jin zixuan; how wwx made lwj a bunny lantern. how soft and touched lwj was. wwx gleefully pointing out he was smiling and lwj IMMEDIATELY PULLING HIW SWORD ON HIM LMAO. tragically foreshadowy promises to do right by pepople, living without regrets. lwjs 'oh no do i love him??' face. just. all of it. 

i have it on good acc that in the novel lwj is explicitly Repressed Gay Panicked Big Horny which is delightful and rly Adds to the performance

 baby lwj is really just conceal dont feel dont let them know u have EMOTIONS (derogatory)

jiang cheng rly went "why dont.u go play with HIM if u like him so much"

jc and wwx have big BIG annoying sibling energy dont think too hard abt it or youll cry

lotus pier is soo pretty :((((((((((((((((

up until episode 13 you could think this could be a magical ancient chinese gays pride n prejudice w swords and shenanigans ................youre just not prepared for the game of thrones of it all

seriously ha ha ha i cried so much w this show my eyes genuinely swelled up . like. physically. fun timez fun timez

that being said, its hilarious that wen xu goes to cloud recesses like 'come out or ill kill all these hostages' and then DOESNT WAIT FOR AN ASWER AND KILLS THEM ALL IMMEDIATELY. do u know how blackmail works sir

 would like to make it recorded that from day one i was like 'CALL A GODDAMN CULTIVATION G20 THIS ASSHOLE SECT IS LITERALLY MASSACRING YALL!!' and it took them like 3 or 4 massacres to do anything and they STILL sent their heirs into their territory  LIKE

when wwx cites the gusu lan rules to wen chao tho. that rebel/attention whore/cutie pie 'look lan zhan i DID memorize the rules after all' ‘also a big fuck you to the wen sect :D :D’ sweet spot that scene achieves . delicious

all the cultivator young masters being petty af even though they are practically prisoners at the cave is hilarious and i love them

hurt and comfort + gay mistunderstandings + watsonian gay declaration music + accidental evil acquisition! at the cave (2)

its like where do i start? the fact theyre both trapped and kind of heavily injured inside an isolated cave with a murder turtle? wwx gay panicking lwj into coughing up bad blood? lwj being jealous as wwx babbles abt mianmian? telling him he shouldnt play with people and wwx saying he never played him? wwx going Oh. I See what is happening. YOU like mianmian, and lwj absolute done face ??? (iconic) wwx touching the sacred married ribbon Again? the telepathic communication? the sword? WEI WUXIAN ASKING LAN WANGJI TO SING TO HIM AS HE IS PASSING OUT AND LWJ SINGING HIM. THE SONG. HE WROTE. FOR WWX. AND THAT HE CALLED. THEIR SHIP NAME????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????

they are SO insufferable pleeeeease

in the words of my friend 1 : “CQL is so gay we were all amazed how it got past the censors Ofc unfortunately it can't be novel level gay But they did their best And we love them for it”

in the theme of songs THIS OST. WUJI HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE SINCE I FIRST HEARD IT the whole ost is so so sO beautiful.

 the costuming in this is also soooo exquisite. the embroidery? the fabrics? the details? how every sect and clan has a distinct style and architecture? (also ik they based each off of dif periods in chinese history which is REALLY fucking cool) just chefs kiss

the direction too!. i enjoy the unusual camera movements and i think they give it that Vibe, also their composition is PARTICULARLY good when it comes to telling the subtext through position of camera/position of character (like nhs off to the side in scenes he at first glance doesnt need to be/ how lwj is often centered when hes Jealous Yearning at wwx being affectionate w other ppl, wwx return from burial mounds etc)

ik madam yu is like Badass Milf Check and shes not getting any mom of the year awards but im delighted at how messy she is. IMAGINE that woman on tiktok

you better have enjoyed gay cave (2) bc its Just Pain from here on out! 

jiang fengmian and madame yu win the Most Dramatic Way to show they do care about each other, actually ..... ever :)

i thought jiang yanli jiang cheng and wei wuxian forcing themselves to escape yunmeng barely holding on after their parents are killed was going to be the height of pain in this show. ha. 

the family dynamics in general on this showwwww, both blood/ adopted/ found families, brotherly bonds and lifelong friendships just. rly. truly. fucked me up. theyre all so important and complicated and well rounded and beautiful and tragic

and beyond being a Win For the Gays im so glad the relationships w wwx and jiang yanli/ wen qing were NOT changed from platonic bc they are so much better like that imo. like maybe if we didnt Live In A Society it wouldnt be so, but the fact wwx and others can love and value them so much and theres nothing romantic or sexual abt it is like. so refreshing. especially @ jyl, with the way he and jc are overprotective of her and shes such a nurturing/care taker figure for them, it would just not vibe as well if they made it romantic

i love that this is a story abt Wei Wuxian, the Yiling Patriarch aka Actual Satan/Boogey Man/Village With/Public Enemy Number One , my dude is literally a necromancer who only dresses in black and has evil smokey black tendrils wafting out of him, but the really edgy one is still jiang cheng, pastel purple fashion icon

and speaking of best/worst siblings wei wuxian and jiang cheng *immediately starts crying* 

The Golden Core Transfer i just. no thots only tears 

wen qing and wen ning putting themselves in so much danger just.... to help them. wn saving jc from wen chao. wq finding a way to get wwx to transfer his core. like thinking about the monumental work these two did to help wwx and jyl and jc... jyl trying so fucking hard to be strong and keep on moving and giver her little brothers comfort after losing everything... jiang cheng. losing his parents and his home and his ability to do anything abt it and his complete desperation and lack of self worth and turning on them with agression  when he didnt realize all that they did for him ... hhhhhhhhhhhhh

me, pointing at the whole cast “i just LOVE them mom!!!”

its sad tho, that BARELY ANY of the women have like.... actual important conversations let alone relationships with each other at all in the story. and like wq and jyl have stayed at the same place for extended periods of time, where wq actively took care of her TWICE,  and still! not one measly convo, nothing! ................ .𝓌ₕᵧ

everyone in this show need a good sip of Self Worth and Stop Sacrificing Yourself juice 

ngl the sword flying looks very dumb 

“a-cheng, please bring a-xian back.” “i will, i promise.” ;-;

the whole calling each other by the More Intimate Version of the name, first as teasing and later as true intimacy. mmmhmmm yes

untamed where everythings the same but wwx evil flute song is eoeo

related that scene when wwx comes back from the burial mounds for the first time w demonic cultivation and he acts all formal and calls lwj hanguang-jun and keeps being evasive and distant and mean and soooooo................. facetious 

and how hes kind of desperately trying to keep intense lwj at bay (A FIRST) and avoiding actually talking to either of them and its all tension ughhh and then he MOCKS his and lwjs relationship, he jokes w him in this like... mean echo of their usual ~banter~ oof 

 and like!!! uncertain but so relieved jc who just HUGS him w no reservations for once and its not like he isnt just as worried as lwj abt wwx and what hes doing, but he chooses in that moment to enjoy getting him back first and mmhmMMMmMm yes (maybe my favorite scene in the whole show? MAYBE SO. ) 

highkey hurt me but also. i might be into mean wwx. i will take no criticism.

lan zhans sad eyes tho :((((((((( 

on one hand i wish we could have seen what happened at the burial mounds but on the other the timeskip adds so much flair to his return so im hnnn

also i love that hes been missing for 3 months reappears kinda melancholic and bloodthirsty and knowing malign tricks and jc is like 'so. are u sad bc of lan wangji'

when ur bae survived the war but he thinks ur evil/ might be evil so you cant kiss :///

hmmm talking at the rooftop under the moonlight not mentioning everything that stands between usssss

they are the two jades of lan and we’ll be the two heroes of yunmeng is the type of line u dont even need to know whats gonna happen to know thats gonna be sad

when they fight wen ruoshan at the nightless city i thought that was the battle we see at the first ep and its not and its so easy and theyre all like ‘yayy we won go wwx!’ i was just. SCREAMS WHAT is gonna HAPPEN

so like. post burial mounds/sunshot campaign pre yiling patriarch wwx is like. ultra arrogant, ultra mocking, peak lil shit and it gave me e v e r y t h i n g i wanted

even tho having the wen prisoners at the targets at phoenix mountain and still having wwx and jzx shooting the arrows was???? so.... tone deaf 

wwx: fucking w demonic energy   jyl: he has never done anything wrong in his life, ever <3 <3 (mood)

the parallels between meng yao/wei wuxian (and even xue yang a bit?) are Seen and they are Valid

wwx post burial mounds: can yall SHUT UP abt the goddamn sword (suibian left the chat)

LIKE truly, we talk abt the angst and yearning with wangxian. but what abt wwx and suibian. xianbian / xianqing angst and comfort 100k

take a shot everytime someone coughs up blood

zidian is simply the coolest spiritual weapon rip to suibian and chenqing and bichen and sendou and baixa........ but tis the truth 

cons: everyones families died in a nightmare war! everyones homes burned to the ground! everyone is traumatized! pros: everyone gets cooler clothes and weapons!!

wen ning and a-yuan and yanli bestest babes squad dont touch me rn

everyone: brooding and fighting                                                                wq and jyl: why dont you try some acupunture/drinking some soup and calm down huh? how abt that bitch?? 

showing the battle/massacre at the nightless city first was genius actually bc then everytime we have a cute scene w yunmeng bros and theyre like 'we'll be together forever! uwu' youre like oh. oh no. oh no no no. 

justice vs lawfulness vs means and ends 👁

jc: stay in the right path and practice the art of the sword                        wx: yeah thats not gonna happen chief

my reaction to wwx renouncing to the sect politics to help the wens was just that elmo burning gif in succession

the dramatic rain. wen qing desperately calling out to wen ning. the ghosts/puppets killing the guards. how terrifying wn actually was while wwx was controlling him :( lwj goeing after him to try and stop him and then he just; he Sees him and understands him even if he cant actually do anything about it other than let them go. 

“there must be somewhere in this earth we can go to :(((((((((”

"IF I HAVE TO FIGHT THEM, I'D RATHER IT BE YOU. DYING BY YOUR HANDS WOULD AT LEAST BE WORTH IT." oh my god oh my god oh my goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddd

also lwjs umbrella is white w black smoke.. .  . nice

yiling patriarch / demonic farming burial mounds settlement is like one of my favorite concepts. they an "EVIL" FARMING COMMUNITY LED BY THE VILLAGE WITCH COME ON

they planted TURNIPS and LOTUS FLOWERS and ONE (1) baby and made lanterns and a common hall :(((((((

wen qing and wei wuxian, baddest bitches and genius science best friends i absolutely LOVED to see it. they rly went ‘is anyone gonna sibling/project partner that’ and didnt wait for an answer

both wwx and jyl getting lotus ponds at the burial mounds and in lanling bc they miss lotus pier ;;;;;;;w

;;;;; wish jyl had actually gone into the burial mounds. we were robbed of jyl and wq meeting again and jyl meeting a-yuan and seeing the settlement and the homes and all ;w; at least jc did go, stab wounds and broken arms and all

wwx like... having thrown his whole life away to help the wens (yeah the sect leaders and jin guangshan in particular wanting his stygian tiger amulet was an Element but still) and not.... necessarily regretting it, but grappling with all of the consequences of it... becoming moody and drepressed at times, missing his family and lotus pier and his friends and probably simply missing being around people and causing trouble, extrovert that he is, lashing out at the wens and at a-yuan, just in general the whole messiness of that experience

the way the resentful energy does affect his temperament is rly nice bc its not too in your face,(i mean outside of the Shaky Hands of Rage) but like he clearly has a much lesser control on his anger and impulsivity (tall order) than both before bm and after hes ressurected

on that note A-YUAN BABIEST BABY BOY BEST BOY

lan zhan being like oh hey there wei ying fancy meeting u and our son here. just passing by u know how it is hmmmmMm and then PLOT TWIST having defied orders to go see him and being punished for it. oof;;

 they habent seen each other in like? a year? and now theyre tgt 10 seconds and are already parenting a child together

also lwj rly kneels down in the snow way too much to be healthy

wwx: calm down guyssss i wont lose control of demonic cultivation omgggg  .   spoiler alert: he loses control of demonic cultivation

did u enjoy cute children? good bc now the Real Pain Begins

jiang yanli and jin zixuan rly out there APROPRIATING both disaster gays AND bury ur gays huh ;w;

i KNEW jin lings birthday was gonna fuck something up but the GASP that left my body when wwx lost control of wn and killed jin zixuan .. . . 

im sorry and thank you aaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAaAAAAA 

when wen ning and wen qing were telling wwx their plan i was saying NO NO NO NO NO NO out loud in despair 

also can we talk abt how wq is definetely talking about only the both of them surrending themselves but then? everyone else just surrenders w them? IT MAKES NO SENSE LIKE WHY WOULD THEY what would be the Point

 sometimes there are some pretty gaping jumps in logic and continuity that are just like                     ?          ?

wwx: oh so when you try to murder me its justified but when i survive through dark magic and murder all of you its a "war crime"

unsurprisingly, his most feral, most spiraling moment talking to the sect leaders on the roof and attacking them and even fighting lan zhan is among my favorite scenes... its like, so painful to watch but also   so       thrilling   (and maybe my wen bbs dying arose some resentful energy in me what can i say) 

and its JUST, all they ever wanted was to do good but then... war. and trauma. and hubris. 

jiang cheng on the ground clearly thorn between what to do and feel is a Mood, lets just say

i was already crying when jyl showed up, but if i wasnt-

 i suffered SO MUCH through this series trying to figure out WHY jc would kill wwx. and when i understood. its somehow not as bad as i thought and also MUCH MUCH WORSE

a look into my group chat during the last flashback episodes:

SO ANYWAY. after the BLOOD BATH and RIPPING YOUR HEART OUT and FEEDING IT TO YOU  the untamed goes ‘ayy back to the present!! tu du dud ud du’ 

literally it ends a quarter into an episode and then KEEPS GOING i had to pause and stare blankly at the ceiling for an hour

babie cultivators and detective soulmates . i do need some cute after All of That 

(not that the pain is over LOL)

lwj is significantly less emotionally repressed in the present and its delightful. hes just ALL IN with wwx. and not just in the ‘i would and have killed various men and risked my reputation for you’ but also ‘ur tired here have a drink i brought it up cause i know u like it and it want you to be happy, always’

“when everyone praised me and wanted my power, you were the only one that challenged me. now that everyone hates me and wants me dead, youre the only one that stands by my side.” hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnn 

and just filling in the blanks how lan zhan searched for him. for all of those 16 years he searched for him and was punished for it and raised a-yuan, the only survivor of the burial mounds settlement, as his own in gusu......

and jiang cheng.  being the tough love uncle . having raised the yunmeng jiang clan from the rubble all alone, his whole family dead, some of it on the blame of his own brother, his siblings, his closest friends gone.......and only jin ling there needing his guidance. 

THE PARALLEL BETWEEN JIN LING BEING A LIFELINE FOR JIANG CHENG AND A-YUAN FOR LAN WANGJI AFTER THE BATTLE AT THE NIGHTLESS CITY  

great now i made myself sad

and like . the fact! that lwj and jc dislike each other!!. jc projects blame onto him for wwx both “leaving” him and indirectly causing their families deaths and when hes so consumed by it he makes wwx an enemy, lwj is there now? trying to protect him?? and lwj, who can never understand the pain that wwx , indirectly or not put jc through, but who was right there when jc tried to kill him and will never allow him to hurt wwx again. and how they like. in a way project blame of their tragedies onto each other while dealing with some type of survivor guilt and in their own way still loving wwx through it all???  amd in way its kind of fundamentally selfish but also tragically understandable? and like when u put it against the fact that after he disappears during the sunshot campaign they were looking for him together and fought together??

JUST. THE CHARACTERS. AND THE RELATIONSHIPS IN THIS. MAN. UGH. GOD. 

and like i think thats what makes it so good? its such a sad and painful and violent story, edgy even, but its compelling bc at the center of it there are all of these relationships and different types of love and hope and. :( i love it

enough crying lets talk abt wwx sleeping at the jingshi with lwj and wearing his under garment for a minute 🙏

 jin ling just has that Was Raised by JC energy tho lmao i love him

babie cultivator squad is the perfect ammount of cute and comedic relief while still bearing the weight? of the narrative in a way, both from sizhui and jin lings existences, and also. like. how do i put this. they feel hopeful? they were born after a war, they came of age at a time of relative peace, they dont hold on so closely to the resentments of their parents/father figures, they are specifically shown as more accepting and open minded. and its like.... Hope for the future  

one of the ?? things  i love the most is the fact that the main cast are often in situations where theyre hunted/running but they like. never wear disguises... just going around in their gorgeous expensive clan clothes and hair ornaments and distinctive spiritual weapons.... maybe w a straw hat on, just for kicks

wwx teacher 🥺🥺🥺

so this is why its called Yi City Misery huh

a-qing is such. an icon. im so sad. my girl even knew to leave xys dumb self rotting by the road but no one listens to her thats why theyre all dead or sad 

her and xue yang measuring each other up was so entertaining lmao

 its the funniest thing when hes like. HERES MY SAD STORY. FOR WHY IM A SADISTIC MURDERER. I BROKE MY HAND ONCE. 

like ok someone broke his hand in a horrible way, and like Poverty, i get it but also like.......... that lost the brunt of a proper sob story like, 50 sadistic murders ago bby

and i love that xingchen does not entertain that for a second hes like ‘not ?????? good enough???’ and the best thing is he wasnt even like 'u hadto be the bigger person' or sth but ' well then break that dudes hand back, rip his arm off for i care, what do the rest of us have to do w anything???” 

anjo sensato :(

xue yang is like..... the sexy sadistic evil version of a himbo..... a meanbo...

the fucked upness of xy’s feelings for xxc/ xxc and sl feelings for each other... like my dude literally gave his bf HIS EYES. and xy getting so attached to xxc .... the fucked up fake domesticity.... having him hurt sl..... then desperately trying to bring him back ...................... oof

song lan........... literally had his eyes AND tongue removed, his bfs eyes put in place, was almost killed, turned into a puppet by his bf unknowingly, manipulated by xy, sees his bf killing himself in despair.... and STILL finds the strenght to get up from there, and keep on traveling and helping people and attempting to fix xxcs soul.......... like, my man. damn. 

wangxian looking at songxiao and seeing an Actually more painful parallel for themselves. ft. that Color Coding. 

THE A-YUAN/SIZHUI REVEAL PUNCHED ME IN THE HEART but in a good way for a change

should have know that he would be the Best Boy the cute one w all the braincells

the butterfly AND the bunny lantern. i see how it is

u know is very convenient that no one can see the stark black veins on wen nings neck, ever 

BAT WEN NING 

wns face when lwj comes into wwx room like ‘:0 omg did u two finally get your shit together? good for you master wei good for u’ 

(they didnt) (yet)

DISASTER DRUNK LWJ. JUST. THRUST SOME CHICKENS TO SHOW UR RESSURECTED BAE THAT U LOVE THEM.

i have absolutely no idea WHY they gave lwj the same punishment for fighting his own sect/allies to protect the burial mounds as when they got drunk on cloud recess class days.... like? its such a ... emotional continuity error again

also is lwj gonna get an actual friend besides wwx , ever

mianmian marrying and having a family and a cute life after saying FUCK U AND UR SYSTEM TOO in a much less unhinged and dramatic way than wwx......... fills me w joy

also lol the idea that like. her husband not knowing that shes friends w satan/the boogey man/the village witch is hilarious

i love nie mingjue bc hes the resident Though Guy but also the most dramatic bitch in this show and thats Saying Something

jin ling cant have one uneventful relative can he

the fact that everyone present already knew “mo xuanyu” was wwx at the stairs is so funny, their faces are like ‘oh............ wow. that. sure is a development. shock” 

in the tradition of extremely loud whispers wwx tells lwj with twelve guards standing like one meter away from them: HEY PSH LAN ZHAN PRETEND IM FORCING YOU TO STAY W ME DO IT

oh my god oh my god

the absolute Yearning on his face when he leaves wwx and a-yuan at the burial mounds and refuses to stay for dinner was already Enough but the fact?? they brought it back?? to this declaration of love?? their expressions??????? strike me dead right now just go ahead

lFor Legal Reasons We Cant Kiss but we will have a very sappy declaration of love and trust and look at each other in way that is the actualization of 💞💘💗💖💓💘💞💗💖💘💗💖💕💞

also icb all the sect leaders and guards are standing there watching them say they like like each other with a dozen swords pointing at their neck

i enjoyed the depiction of the fickle public perception and how easily it can be used to scapegoat people. when the sect leaders turn on jgy and wwx knows thats its more for convenience than anything else...

poor lxc is literally like 'oh so when YOUR problematic boyfriend gets called evil its a misunderstanding but when its MY problematic bf-'

ok like i cant get over nmj let jgy play a song that messed with his temperament at all, like maN u KNEW he might be shady wth

wwx: “hey dont say anything bad abt lan zhan hes not an arrogant dick, thats just his face. 

ME ON THE OTHER HAND"

the cultivators as wwx is poking holes in their narrative is literally *nazaré meme*

"wei wuxian-!" "what did i break your leg, too?" not to be problematic but i laughed so hard

not as hard as "you dont have the rank to talk to me " tho

i Enjoy that, over the course of story, wwx sees that... theres nothing truly to Do, but move on. he saw how his arrogance and his mistakes hurt others, and hes trying to fix what he can, but he already did die for his mistakes and there are things he cant fix and that's. just how it is. even towards jgy, the narrative doesn't go gleefully and completely with "lets make THEM pay bc theyre the big bad" bc its not that simple, and it wouldn't lead anywhere but more pain...

re him and jiang cheng and the wens and kinda. isnt that what nhs did? scheming to displace jgy out of revenge more than any justice and doing so in the most painful way?

idk if that actually makes sense im truly just babbling

i thought the scene at the lotus pond would be CUTE but the context was PAIN again

jiang cheng finding out about his golden core and his conflict with wwx at the guanyin temple .... destroyed me but in a nice way kinda.... same way it destroys him look at his face oh god

and. the fact??? he sacrificed himself for wwx?? first?? and he'll probably never tell anyone much less wwx???? keeps me up at night

i havent decided if the neckbreak transition between jgy does sth super Evil or does he he does OR Does He yes he does O R does heeeee is sth i dislike or not

jin guangyao and wei wuxians most interesting parallel is that... theyve both seen 'hmm hey this system is fucked up' and wwx went 'so fuck it all i will renounce it and challenge it' and jgy went 'so fuck it i will use all of it to my advantage and manipulate it to my goals and whims'

the fact jgys mom was actually great and he loved her and his whole issue w it was more than simply being ashamed of being a bastard kinda got me ngl

never trust a dude with a fan.

nhs and jgy: the first rule to a convoluted and decades spanning violent revenge plot is to have fun and be yourself! 

when a-yuan finally FINALLY remembers ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; wen ning has someone in his family back and a-yuan has someone to talk abt his wen family and wwx has him back bc he survived and lwj raised him anD HES THEIR SON. THEYRE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. UGH.

and theyre allowed to heal. everyone is allowed to try and recover and be happy

netflix put all of the 3 endings on top of each other and it looks kinda weird actually BUT I DONT EVEN MIND :’’’’’’’’’)

the gasp that left me when lwj says ‘wei ying’ and wwx turns.........

there was also a screen with ‘thank you mxtx for creating these characters, we hope their wishes come true’ and i might. have cried then too. maybe. 

that was . a ride. as is proven by this behemot of a ramble clearly i just really needed and Outlet. i am currently trying to convince dumb monkey brain to not consume the other medias of mdzs immediately bc i REALLY need to like. live. a life. and take care of real responsibilities.  *longest oh boi ever*

[cherishedkids]

tomioka giyuu as a dad || hcs

A/N: thank u to anon who requested, i hope u enjoy reading this!! finally, im caught up with my backlogs 🙏 and i’lll be able to answer the asks in my inbox. thank you for waiting!! 💕

it had never been in tomioka giyuu’s plan to have a child. 

in fact, he wasn’t really expecting to come this far.

in his lifetime, he was able to defeat muzan and start a normal life with his spouse.

so, domestic life was new for him.

but he adjusted well.

he kept a great record of how his son was progressing.

every month, giyuu would have him stand next to a wall, and he’d measure how tall he has gotten.

it was cute, seeing him so focused on checking his growth.

when his son said his first words, he was so proud.

partly because he was right on time, according to his chart, but also because it was “dad”!

the wonder and pride grew when he also learned how to say his own name.

in a few months, his baby talk turned into small phrases.

he was finally able to converse with his son.

he humored his son a lot.

sometimes, he’d say he forgot a word and asked him about it.

he always felt happy when he answered with the correct one.

giyuu also made sure that his son would get a great education.

when his son got accepted into a prestigious school, he rejoiced.

he made sure to instill morals and principles of justice, so he’d never stray from his path.

one thing giyuu was adamant on was to never let him know about his past.

he’d never let him be a swordsmith.

but when his son was asked,

“dad, where did you get your scars?”

he almost choked.

“it’s nothing,”

he hated to lie, but he didn’t know what else to say.

then, he hid all his belongings that were related to his past work.

he was adamant on letting his son live without knowing anything about it.

as his son was cleaning out the storage area, he found an old uniform and a rusted sword hidden.

when he confronted giyuu about it, he got angry and afraid.

“it’s none of your business,”

“but you’re my father—shouldn’t i know about your past?”

he gestured for him to go outside, as he needed to collect his thoughts.

he was not ready to relive the past, but he wanted his son to know where he came from.

with hesitation, he slid the door open to his son’s room and told him everything.

the sword, was long ago used everyday to defeat demons.

“i don’t understand… why are you so shameful of your past?”

he had his head down.

“a lot of people died trying to protect me. a lot of people died, even when i got stronger. why did i survive when they didn’t?”

his son looks at him with worry.

he had never seen his father be like this.

all his life, his father was a pillar for him, one that protected and guided him.

his own son comforts him that night.

“you survived because you were strong. should you not enjoy life for them?”

he remembers the words of his old student through his son.

“thank you.”

even though he had lived through it all his life, he finds himself grateful for his son’s words.

the pain somehow feels less to him.

“thank you so much.”

in the middle of his life, he’s decided to live without any regrets.

he should be thankful for those who put their lives on the line, as he was able to meet his son.

[yoongisnoona]

Calluna Chapter 1

Tags: Pining, Romance, Shifter AU, Violence, Possible Smut

Warning for Chapter: Domestic Abuse

Word count: 1.3k

Summary: When his father becomes a danger to his family, Yoongi runs with his brother and mother, feeling ashamed he left his Pack to suffer his fathers wrath, he trains everyday to become the alpha he should be to take his father out. But when a lovely little vixen falls into his life, Yoongi is unsure whether to ignore her for her own safety or claim her as his. The choice may not be up to him however as Dahye is just as enamoured with him as he is her…

Chapter 1

The screams coming from downstairs were horrible. His mum had told him to go upstairs and take his brother and lock the door.

Jungkook was looking up at him unsure on what to do, and Yoongi was lost. He could hear every kick and punch his father gave his mother, alongside every scream.

This was not a new thing, the main pack knew what was going on, a lot of them wanted to help and wanted to stop the abuse that was happening, but the pack was lacking alphas and the ones that were around were not strong enough to take out his father. Either that or they were too afraid of the rest of the pack that sided with his father.

Yoongi knew it wasn’t safe. Jungkook and himself had been hit multiple times by their father before, Yoongi could fight his way out, Jungkook had learned the hard way that that's what he had to do. His mother however was not strong enough.

He had to get them away. Turning to Jungkook, his eyes lit bright gold “Jungkook, pack what you can, go out the back and pack the car. I’m Gonna grab all the money and valuables in the house then find a way to knock out dad.” Yoongi growled.

Jungkook looked at his older brother eyes wide “Yoon… What?” Yoongi ‘s eyes flashed at Jungkook “Not the time for this kook. Just do as I say. I need to get you and ma outta here.”

Jungkook realised his brother was serious and kicked into gear. He grabbed a few bags and suitcases from the cupboards and started packing things.

Yoongi had a stash of money hidden in his room, then ran to the stash that he knew his mum hid in her bedroom.

He checked in with Kook who had almost finished packing clothes and important things. “Kook, where is your baseball bat?”

Jungkook looked nervously over at his brother “Yoon…” Yoongi placed the bags on the bed and walked over to his brother. “Kook… this needs to be done. I can't let him hurt You, ma or me anymore. He is not fit to be Alpha but I'm not strong enough to fight him, let alone take over the place as pack alpha yet, so this is all I can do. Please just get the bags in the car and anything else you think we may need.” he explained to the younger.

Jungkook hesitated as if he wanted to say something but then nodded and got the bat for Yoongi. Taking the bat from Jungkook, Yoongi crept from his and Jungkook's room, past the kitchen and into the front room where he withheld a growl.

His Father had his back to him but held his mother by her hair, slapping her from side to side. His mother already had bruises around her face and was bleeding. She had one hand holding her chest and another trying to protect her face so he knew that her ribs were either broken or bruised too.

With his fathers back to him and his mother not able to see him, he crept a little closer, raised the bat and took a heavy swing against his father's head. His father dropped to the floor unconscious, blood dripping down the back of his head. Not caring, Yoongi turned towards his mother and picked her up and rushed to the car.

Jungkook was just closing the boot to the car, Yoongi noticed their bedroom window was wide open and realised Jungkook must have been using the window as a route to take things to the car. “Is that all Kook?” Jungkook nodded, looking at their mothers whimpering form in Yoongi’s arms. “Money is on the driver's seat, not sure whether you needed it straight away or not?” Jungkook said to him, taking their Mother from his arms and placing her on the back seat.

Jungkook and Yoongi took their seats in the front and Yoongi started the car quickly turning to Jungkook. “Keep an eye on her kook, she's not in good shape... I’ll let you in on the plan once we're out of pack territory” Jungkook nodded. Yoongi set off and the ride out of pack territory was relatively quiet, other than their mothers whimpering in the back of the car. Once they reached the town area, Yoongi started to talk.

“We’re going to Rosewhych, I have a friend who is a member of the Pride there. Hopefully he will either let us stay for a few days to sort ourselves out or point us in the right direction.” Yoongi explained, mainly to Jungkook as he wasn't sure his mother was conscious at this point.

“But Yoon, what are we gonna do about the Pack? We can't just abandon them...there are those who helped us, helped Ma through the shit Dad put us through. Imagine the hell there going to go through without us being there.” Jungkook tried to reason with his brother.

“Kook, I know. I know that but at the moment all I care about is getting you and Ma away from that sorry excuse for a man. I promise you, I will come back and sort out the pack, but I will be the first to admit that I'm just not strong enough yet, both physically and mentally. I need to be strong enough to take out dad and be able to be the Alpha for the pack and if i tried doing that now, everyone would suffer even more.” Yoongi explained to the younger one.

Jungkook sighed, but Yoongi realised he understood. The ride to Rosewych was a quiet journey, filled only with the soft music Yoongi put on for some background noise.

Once Yoongi thought they were close enough to Rosewych he pulled over the car and took out his mobile. Dialing a number, he held the phone to his ear waiting for an answer. “Hey Yoongi, What up?” a voice filtered through the speaker.

“Hey Seokjin...Alots up at the moment. Look I know this is short notice, but would you be able to put my brother, Mother and myself up for a couple of days by any chance? Our dad...we had to get away..and you were the only person I know that he doesn't know about.”

“Shit man… Of course. That's no problem. I'll let the pride know. Where are you at the moment?”

“Just on the outskirts of Rosewych. Figured I'd give you a call first before turning up on your doorstep.” Yoongi said with a sad smile.

“You know I wouldn't have turned you away anyways you idiot. I would have probably thought you just missed my beautiful face.” Seokjin chuckled down the phone.

Yoongi laughed a little “Thanks Seokjin. We should be there in about 20 minutes… also… My mum is not in the best of states… she took the brunt of my dads...abuse. Have you got any medical supplies?” he asked softly.

He could hear Seokjin take in a sharp breath “I’ll ask the pride healer if she can drop by, if she can’t then I'm sure we have something lying around here. Lord knows Chim and Tae get into enough trouble as it is...are you doing alright though Yoongi?” Seokjin questioned.

Yoongi sighed “not really, but i'm holding it together.”

“Okay well i'm here if you wanna talk when you get her alright?” Seokjin let him know.

“I know, Thanks Seokin...I’ll see you in 20.”

“See you soon”

Hanging up the phone Yoongi rested his head back against the seat headrest and let out a small sigh of relief. Turning to look at his brother he smiled noticing that he was sleeping peacefully. Looking back at the backseat at his mother, noticing she was also asleep, but seeing her wounds he frowned “dont worry ma, i’ll grow stronger and i will sort everything out for you and Kook, don't worry.” he whispered to her.

Turning back to the road he started the car up again and drove off to where he knew Seokjin's house to be.

________

Welcome to my work in progress fanfiction series starting with Yoongi. I hope you enjoy even if it is a bit of a dark start to a story, but the majority of the fanfiction wont be like this :) Im still writing the second chapter, but i wanted to get chapter 1 of this out to see what people think. I will eventually be cross posting this on Archive of our own under https://archiveofourown.org/users/PockyKai

[sereniv]

I'm not enrolled

I cant

I dont have access to papers from my Yaqui family because my cousin hasn't shown me yet

and I do what I can like learn our language and help out members

and even though I have nothing to gain from any of it

I dont talk about being native often, and if I do it's usually with a stutter. I have to fight back and forth with myself on whether I want to say something when it's relevant

bc im always afraid of being seen as a pretendian

and I know I'll always feel this no matter what. bc I've always felt it about being mexican. even when I couldn't put it into words

it's just it seems so outside me. and ive talked to people who have had the same experiences and I STILL feel outside me. that they aren't my experiences or that they aren't enough

Im mutual with some Yaqui ppl on fb, and one posted the Yaqui flag made up as a pride flag (the red and blue were rainbow)

And though I personally would not have covered the red and blue since they have meaning, I still like it

and the person who posted it had someone comment that it's a sacred flag and that the rainbow desecrate it.

now ofc this person is just straight up lgbtphobic. But besides that, it again, is something Yaqui related that I feel so outside from

I hate that on the stance of the flag, I can't tell if it IS disrespectful (to at least cover the colors).

It's funny bc I was on reddit a while ago talking about my experience and feelings on being mixed and native, and talking about how it's hard not to fall into the whole BQ mindset and wish I could enroll.

And I went on about how enrollment doesn't make one native or not, what enrollment meant to me, and all that. Boiling down to expectations of other ppl and my own low self worth

Anyway I recognized that BQ was bullshit, that enrollment didn't make native, it was just me venting.

And someone who literally says ppl who are half aren't native, mind u lol, telling me I'm not really native bc I think being enrolled means I'm native

then again its reddit

Anyway

I'm always doubting myself. like I've talked with other indigenous ppl. I've said my shit. I've had people feel the same exact way and no matter what I do, I'm on the outside

and I feel like its just all in my head. because besides some ppl on reddit, everyone has been welcoming. and understanding. and patient. and accepting

I'm my own bully. the recent Native news, it's something I black listed. I dont even think Yaqui ppl had schools, but it still something I don't want to read or see.

and I feel stupid for feeling that way? I'm thinking I'm just trying to like idk??

I havnt even told anyone that it bothered me. so how can I be preforming if no one knows?

that's what sucks. is like if I were not me, I'd be like dude. being mixed and trying to connect is hard and these feelings are normal. they might not go away but they'll lessen.

I always think what if I'm not Yaqui. even with my cousin saying he seen the papers. even though my recent ancestors came from Sonora Mexico. Even though my dad looks a lot of Yaqui men to where I can literally guess a guy is Yaqui

it's like nope. it's fake. and I'm lying.

hate feeling this way lol!

it'll go away. or well, like I'll be fine.

it's just I write this and I roll my eyes and I imagine someone else reading this and rolling their eyes and there's nothing i can do

there's nothing I can do but be.

[faunahudson]

love in a bottle | sauna

WHO: Sawyer Hudson and Fauna Hudson - @sawyer-hudson

WHEN: 14th of February 

WHERE: Hudson Apartment and the Beach

WHAT: Sawyer and Fauna do a cute valentines gift exchange

WARNINGS: too much cute

Though not their first Valentine’s Day together, Sawyer wanted their first one as as claimed couple to be as special as he could. Admittedly, he got this idea from TikTok, and fully knowing Fauna would have seen it, made sure to have a back-up surprise for her. “Happy Valentine’s Day,” He greeted her when she came back from her workout with Alexis, a peck on her lips. “Fancy walking Bingley on the beach? Show off our amazing loving family?”

Fauna had never liked Valentine’s Day before Sawyer, usually she’d just bought a Tesco’s box of chocolate coated strawberries, watched Pride and Prejudice and called it a night. But now she couldn’t help but love the cheesy movies, the heart shaped balloons and the over large stuffed animals. “Happy Valentine’s Day.” She responded happily, unable to stop herself from stealing a second peck. “I’d love to handsome, let me just change my hoodie. You mind getting our precious son ready to go?”

He laughed against her lips. "I'm sorry, who's hoodie?" He asked teasingly, pinching the familiar material momentarily, before letting go. "Of course, take your time." Sawyer said, stroking her hair and pressing a kiss against it, leaving the room to come face to face with Bingley, sitting up excitedly as if he already knew something good was happening today. "Hey buddy, c'mon, shall we go to the beach?" Sawyer asked in his 'dog-dad' voice, grinning when Bingley barked back as if to say yes. Once they were ready and waiting for Fauna, he scooped up the large dog as if he were a small puppy. "You think I can sneak you into the Valentine's Day party tonight?" He asked him, who whined in response. "Maybe dress you like a little cupid? You'll be stealing hearts if I do that."

“Oh yes.. Our hoodie.” Fauna responded with a wink. “I’m always telling you Sir, you’re more than welcome to borrow my clothes.” The little brunette teased before slipping back into their room. She ended up stripping off all of her clothes when she got through, deciding she looked like a sweaty mess. Trading them in for a fresh sports bra, his HUDSON hoodie from high school and some leggings. She leaned against the door watching him momentarily with their dog. “God you two are cute? You sure you don’t want to just spend valentines together?” She teased lightly.

“If you wanted me in a little crop top and skirt you should have dressed me that way for Switch Week,” Sawyer had teased in response. He let out a low whistle at the image of her in his high school hoodie, an affectionate grin on his face at how much she drowned in it. “I mean as amazing as a date Bingley would be,” He said, “I also think he’d get too overexcited at the chocolates being passed around campus today and we don’t want an emergency trip to the vet do we buddy?” He asked the dog who just barked in response, wiggling to indicate he wished to be released. Sawyer set him down and he raced towards Fauna, almost toppling her over with the sheer strength he had. “Hey buddy calm down we don’t walk you knocking your mom over,” He warned lightly, before reaching over to Fauna, planting a kiss on her cheek as he steadied her from being knocked off her feet by their dog.

Fauna giggled when he whistled at her as he spotted her. “If you like this you should see what I’ve got planned for later.” She told him thinking of the heart covered lingerie set and cute valentines dress she had tucked away. His affectionate worrying about Bingley made her smile even softer. “No your Mom would like to avoid taking you to the vet for anything but check ups.” She agreed, bracing herself a little as the dog raced over to her, running her fingers over his silky ears. Grateful when he steadied her. “Bingley is the only soul alive I wouldn’t be jealous of if you took them as a date.” She told him as they headed for the beach. “Otherwise it would be a trip to mermaid lagoon im afraid.”

"I can't wait to to see it," Sawyer promised her, "Honestly I'm...intrigued by this party. What can be done with a unlimited amount of money the hostess has." He didn't know Sugar all that well, but from her brief stint dating Finn, and her interactions in general, she tended to just throw money around without a care in the world, Even with his own new-found wealth, Sawyer and Fauna knew how to budget, and did their ball with a spending limit, so he was interested in what a party with no budget would look like. He let out a sigh when the hard concrete of the path turned into the soft sand these beaches were famous for, and he took a moment to appreciate how lucky he got, how amazing his life was. He laughed at Fauna's threat, pulling her in closely. "You know I wouldn't be able to stand by as you took various prospects under, so maybe be a bit more sneaky." He said with a wink.

Fauna nodded. “I’m beyond hype to go to this Sugar Motta party, girl bought a lemon farm on a whim.. I’m sorta imagining giant heart cookies like the one from bridesmaids.” She explained, squeezing his hand just a little as they reached the beach in their secret message to one another. Giggling just a little as he pulled her into his side. “Oh Sir.. you don’t think I’d be silly enough to tell you where I was going.” The little submissive smiled. “I’d take the Wendy Bird or Lad somewhere nice and quiet to drown them. Then I’d come home and tell you how handsome you were and just how much I loved you.” She declared. “Honestly though, I’m so lucky to have you and not have to share you.”

Sawyer laughed. “I honestly wouldn’t be surprised if it was more of an Alice in Wonderland, Queen of Hearts situation.” He said, imagining everywhere having a love heart caricature placed on it somehow, including warped furniture shaped like it. “It’ll be nice though, and it’s good that Rory and Finn have a gig too.” He mentioned. As much as he enjoyed teasing her about her willingness to do whatever it took to keep Sawyer to herself, the Dominant knew he’d do the same for Fauna. The idea of anyone else having her saddened him, and he felt comfort that they were on similar wavelengths. “I’m so lucky not to have to share you either, we’re Fauna-and-Sawyer, there’s no want, need or space for a third party.” He squeezed her hand back. “Wanna bet who’s faster catching a frisbee, you or Bingley?” He then asked, grabbing the plastic disc out of the backpack he carefully put together late last night.

Fauna made a little hum of interest. “I mean I would like to see that, especially if they had a variety of jam filled cakes and treats. I love strawberry jam.” She said hopefully, as she pictured playing cards dangling from the ceiling and Sugar in a large gold crown. “It is good, it always makes me happy when someone gives them a gig. DFS is one of Rorys big passions and.. well... I always like to see him up and doing something he enjoys.” The little brunette replied, he probably didn’t realise just how much she enjoyed his little confirmation that he only ever wanted her. That she was more than enough. “Nope, just you and me forever oh love of mine. Besides there’s no room in the bed now that Bingley keeps trying to sleep in between us. I woke up to get a glass of water the other night and he had his paws on my shoulders.” She giggled, and then glanced at the frisbee forever competitive even with the dog. “I mean he has stronger legs.. so he has an unfair advantage.”

"Are you hinting at wanting some strawberry jam?" Sawyer asked with a large smile, "Because I'm sure there's like...an ocean-side café somewhere that does the whole British afternoon tea thing with strawberry jam and scones," He pointed out, gesturing a bit further up the beach,"and I think there could be an outdoor table if we schmooze enough on this fine day of St. Valentine." "The band's really good, and if they're wanting to take it to the next level, it's perfect exposure for them." The Dominant agreed, pouting at the dog as Fauna describe their sleeping arrangements, "He's very affectionate, but he's the laziest pup known to man, his whining when I take him out on a morning is reminiscent of having to get you up for your workouts with Alexis." He alaughed, "I think you stand a fair chance against him," Sawyer disagreed, "Even if you don't, he likes to be chased." And with that he flung the frisbee down the beach. "Fetch!" He called out with a laugh.

“I mean I wasn’t.. it was more of just a stream of consciousness.. but now that you mention it that sounds so cute Sir!” The submissive responded excitedly, skipping just a little at the thought of getting to sit in a little ocean side cafe with him having a cream tea. “I’m sure that with the power of our love and a small green tip we can make it happen. I’ll show you the proper order for putting the jam and cream on your scone.” Fauna responded excitedly, thinking that she would also insist on cutting his scones into heart shapes. “He’s just a baby, he can’t help being tired!! He needs his sleep.” The brunette defended, reaching down with a little hand to pet over their dogs head again. “Hmm. Well yes he does like to be chased.” She agreed, and then took off down the beach after the frisbee. Bingley chased enthusiastically out in front, and got there long before her.

Sawyer laughed, "I'd hope so, I wouldn't want to embarass you for eating one incorrectly," He teased. "Maybe there'll even do a puppucino for that one," He mused, "He needs to get up like everybody else." Sawyer's heart burst everytime he saw the affection for the dog in Fauna's eyes, hearing it in her voice, and he was so grateful to have her in his life. That fate brought them together, and gave them this life. Sure it wasn't perfect, it wasn't idyllic, because they were human and had to face challenges and issues. But they got thse moments, that both worked extremely hard for, and for that he would do anything to get another one, and another day with her. When she was distracted chasing Bingley, he got the other item out of his backpack, an aged bottle that was inspired by a TikTok he saw. He had placed a note in it, including writing out one of his favourite poems, aged it with a teabag, furling it over with a bracelet that had their birthstones on it, intertwined together. He also included a loveheart charm to represent the day, to be added to her collar, and a small pick 'n' mix bag of sweets Rory helped him pick out. He ran up to place it on the shore, packing wet sand around it, before running back to his usual spot, just as Bingley came racing back, bounding up to him, almost knocking him out with the frisbee he managed to collect.

Fauna leaned up on her toes and kissed the underside of his chin affectionately. "You could never embarrass me Sir, I knew what I was getting into when I chose an American as my forever." She'd stopped herself from saying boyfriend, because it always seemed a little too insignificant for what she felt for Sawyer. He was so much beyond just a boyfriend or even her Dominant, he'd showed her what it meant to be happy, how to be more healthy and helped her to find her voice and beyond loving him she was just so grateful to him for all of that. Bingley of course had gotten to the frisbee long before her, but he gave her an affectionate nudge on his way back to Sawyer as if to say. 'Come on Mom'. She chased him back, breathless by the time she returned to the tall boy. "He beat me.. obviously." The little submissive pouted. "But it wasn't a competition." She specified to herself, leaning against Sawyer. "Honestly it's good I do Alexis' hell work outs so I can keep up with our bouncy son."

Sawyer smiled fondly at Fauna’s little reminder, mostly to herself, that the chase with the dog was not a competition, and he leaned down to kiss her on the top of her head. “Well second place is still good,” He assured her, “it is just our luck we’d have the world’s most hyperactive dog but I wouldn’t change it for the world.” He thought back to how shy and timid Bingley was the day they brought him home from the shelter and how he blossomed from a nervous animal to their boisterous boy they had grown to love. He took Fauna’s hand, glancing at where the bottle was placed, wondering the best way for her to notice it without being too obvious.

Fauna decided not to disagree with Sawyer on the subject of second place still being good, mostly because she believed that her Dominants attitude was better than her own when it came to competitions. "I mean we're both energetic people, so it's good he ended up with us. It'd be sad if he was with people who didn't take him for long runs and wrestle him in the living room. But I'll be honest I canne believe you were worried he might not want to run with you." The girl giggled, petting over their dogs ears. Leaning against Sawyer as he took her hand.

"I believe in fate and destiny," Sawyer mentioned with a shrug, "I just know we were meant to end up with him." He laughed at her comment about his worries regarding him running, reaching down to give their dog a ruffle on the back of his neck, tossing the frisbee again for him to chase after, making sure to pull Fauna closer so she knew not to chase after it this time. "Hindsight is a wonderful thing," He told her, glancing over to the bottle where it had caught the sun, shimmering like a rare jewel. If she didn't notice it soon enough, he would have no choice but to pick it up himself for her, and tell her, gently, she might need her glasses prescription strengthened.

Fauna nodded. “I didn’t used to, but the longer I’ve been with you.. the longer I do.” She told him honestly, it wasn’t an entirely new sentiment. She’d described in detail to him her tween optimism that had melted into teenage nihilism after Charlotte, which somehow had come full circle back to total and utter belief since she’d found him. “It is-“ She started before she followed his eyeline and saw something glinting. “Is that for me?” She asked excitedly, before she pulled him over. Kneeling in the sand to pull the things out. Carefully brushing the sand off, and making a gentle. “Oh.” Of excitement when she saw the bracelet and note inside. “Sir this is so lovely.” She said affectionately, as she went to uncork it. Gently running her fingers over the outside.

Even though he had heard it a thousand times in a thousand different ways, Sawyer would always feel a bit of his heart break when Fauna alluded to her past. The suffering, the torture, how people didn't even treat her with basic decency and dignity. But today wasn't about recalling the bad times, it was about celebrating the good times, and the love they had shared within these past couple of years. Whatever she was about to say was lost on both of them when she noticed the gift, and he couldn't help but laugh as she dragged him over with excitement, watching her reactions carefully. "I can't take credit for the idea, but I think you like the sentiment of us living out a Tik Tok more than anything," He teased. "And don't worry, I have another bottle chilling in the fridge for you back home full of something you do like, if you're not satisfied with this one."

Fauna waved her hand when he said that he couldn't take credit for the idea, eagerly getting on her knees in the wet sand to pull out of the note and read through the poem with a little smile on her face. Rolling the bracelet onto her wrist, she held it up to let it sparkle in the light. "You made it so much better though and I do love the idea of us living out a Tik Tok. I'll totally be posting about this later" She encouraged, carefully running her finger over the bracelet now on her wrist. "These are our birthstones right?" The brunette quizzed, and then squeaked when she saw the charm for her collar. "Thank you so much Sir! You've got me so many things. I love them." Standing up, she stood on her tip toes so he knew she wanted to kiss him. "Almost as much as I love you."

Sawyer often had moments where he wished he could capture it all in a photograph, or some sort of living memory similar to the pensieve in the Harry Potter series. This was definitely one of them, watching Fauna's eyes light up in wonder as she navigated through the contents of the bottle. "I'll look forward to all the thirst traps on my Book Tok account," He teased. Sawyer had relented a while ago, and agreed to have Fauna make him a TikTok, originally just for him to post recommendations and literary memes, but had somewhat snowballed to a lot of unhinged comments, especially once they had made the connection he and Fauna were a couple. "Yes," He confirmed, "I think the colours really compliment each other well. It's as if the universe is telling us something," Sawyer winked, leaning down to kiss her at her signal. "I love you too."

Fauna carefully put the poem and the charm back into the bottle not wanting to lose them in the sand, slipping the candy into her pocket for later. "I mean you are the king of the literary thirst trap.. You should see the comments under the Darcy hand clench." She teased back happily, before kissing him long and hard. Using her new advantage to wrap her legs around his waist, and arms around his neck so that she was clinging to him like a little koala. "I'm somewhat sure that our names are written in the stars somewhere." She told him honestly, running her hand over his face. "I didn't think to bring your present to the beach, but it is wrapped up very nicely for you at home."

Sawyer could feel himself blush at the mention of the scene, thinking back to how amazed at how much his phone could blow up at just random people on TikTok thirsting over him. But he didn't care about any of that, when he had Fauna here with him. The only person he'd ever need, really, wrapped around him like he was, as certain people would say, a giant tree creature. "You know the whole 'written in the stars' phrase is a misquote," He said, before he could stop himself, "From Julius Caesar, the play, I don't know if he actually said the quote. But I agree, we were truly destined for each other. I can't wait to get us home then," He said with a chuckle, "You do have the better wrapping."

Fauna kissed both of his cheeks all along his jaw and chin for good measure and then looked at him with interest. “Oh?” She responded. “What’s the real quote then? My tutor would be super ashamed of me if I was misquoting.” The little brunette teased, whistling for Bingley who had been rolling around in the sand. “It’s the surgeon hands, they make me very precise and steady with most things.” She explained, lifting one hand from around his neck to show him. “Though I didn’t actually really wrap these gifts, I found these really cool 1960’s Valentine’s chocolate boxes online and used them instead.”

It was as if it was an automatic response, Sawyer's eyes fluttering shut in serenity whenever Fauna's lips made contact with his face. An action so soft, proving how safe he felt with her, how much he trusted her completely. "The fault, dear Brutus, is not in our stars, but in ourselves, that we are underlings," He quoted, "As said by Cassius in Julius Caesar. Is it fate that drives us to do things, or a weakness within us as humans to act against our will? The phrase has been quoted and misquoted so many times, analysed to the point of exhaustion, it somehow led to 'written in the stars', which I prefer anyhow." He laughed at her explanation, watching her hands carefully, as if they'd do some sort of trick to prove they were surgeon hands. "That does sound cool, let's hope there wasn't any chocolate inside when you received them. 50 year old chocolate does not sound like the most delicious Valentine's treat."

Fauna listened to him quoting with rapt attention, Sawyer always claimed he was a terrible actor but the little brunette didn't really think that could be true. Not with the way that he read things, with such rich and deep emotion. Despite her interest in literature she'd never much cared for Shakespeare until she learned that Sawyer could quote it by heart, now she took every opportunity to hear the century old words. "I like it both ways." She confessed. "I especially like the quote about human weakness.. very earth shattering." She giggled, tapping him on the nose with the end of her finger. "There wasn't no, and someone had cleaned them well because they smell all perfumey."

He squeezed her hand as she confessed her preference for both analyses, because that's what he truly loved about literature. No one opinion was set in stone, and everything could be open to interepreation. "Me too, keeps me grounded." Sawyer admitted, often using this quote his own reminder that he didn't have to be mythologically strong to be perfect. That it was human to make mistakes sometimes. "Ah, vintage perfume. I wonder if it'll remind me of my grandma." He wondered, "You know the one, visited at Thanksgiving? Definitely where Finn's inherited such a unique train of thought." He teased.

Fauna smiled softly as he squeezed her hand, always feeling a sort of warmth low in her chest when he did so. “Of course that’s what you think of to keep yourself grounded.” She smiled fondly, wondering how she got so lucky. “Ah yes! Lovely Lady definitely gave me an insight into where Finn came from. Did not understand that I was joking about the placemats looking good enough to eat.” The submissive remembered. “You want me to walk back to the apartment or am I getting a free ride?” She asked, fluttering her lashes a little for her preferred outcome.

Sawyer laughed. "In all fairness, we all know you will eat absolutely anything, no matter what," He teased, "I believe when we first met you even referred to yourself as a raccoon?" He squeezed her hand back, feeling completely enamoured with her in this moment, maybe just slightly influenced by the love in the air this Valentine's. At her hinting, Sawyer playfully rolled his eyes. "I think I can arrange a ride for you," He said with a shrug, as if he hadn't completely given in, "Piggyback, shoulder carry, or bridal carry, Kitten?"

She giggled along with him, though she also gave his arm a playful poke. “I mean it’s true I am a racoon, and I will eat basically anything.. except I’ve discovered that I fully detest that spray cheese in a can that you have in this country.. I’m half convinced that it isn’t for human or raccoon consumption.” The little brunette responded, her thumb smoothing over the back of his hand. “Bridal, I want to be able to look into those beautiful brown eyes of yours.” She told him with a slightly love sick smile.

Sawyer laughed, the spray can of cheese a fond snack for him in his youth, he and Finn bringing disgust to the rest of the clan for how much of the stuff they could put away. “Probably not,” He agreed, “but I enjoy it.” At her request, the Dominant bowed, before sweeping her up without further warning. “Anything for you, Ms. Hudson.” He said, making sure he was supporting her correctly, before leaning down for a kiss. “I love you so much. Thank you for an excellent Valentine’s Day so far.”

Fauna wrinkled her nose in disgust. "You know it's true love when you still desire him even after he declares his love for spray cheese.." She admitted and then giggled as he swept her off her feet, Bingley barking excitedly as he did so. Accepting the kiss with a little sigh of delight. She really hoped that he would like the jacket as much as she thought that he would. "I love you more than I could ever tell you, thank you for my gorgeous presents."

He playfully nudged her for her comment, smirking a little when her smart-mouth elicited a squeal instead, trying to manoeuvre carrying her safely, and keeping Bingley from excitedly jumping up on Fauna's lap to also be carried. And though it was a moment of chaos, it was absolutely perfect all the time. "Thank you for accepting them, and even though I haven't seen mine yet, I'm sure they're amazing and I love them as well." He promised her, playing with a tendril of her hair. "Onwards?"

Fauna clung a little more tightly to her boyfriend as he moved her away from their dogs eager paws, and nodded with a peaceful and fond express. "I mean if you don't love them, I'm lucky enough to have a very talented mouth that's basically a get out of jail free card for all gift giving." She joked and then just looked at him for a moment, silently thanking whatever cosmic force had allowed him into her life. "Onwards." She agreed with a grateful sigh.

Sawyer rolled his eyes at her teasing. "That's very true, and I am very appreciative for that little mouth of yours." He promised her, whistling at Bingley to follow as he carried them away from the beach. "I hope my mouth has the same talents, as I don't think I'll be able to top it next Valentine's Day." He joked.  "Yes, Ms. Hudson." He said, with a playful eye roll, content and happy with where their life was, at this current moment.

[theskyexists]

Jeeze

I've only seen one Christmas movie before in truth - and that was AWFUL - like, the second hand embarrassment was insane - and in the end she....kinda swapped her boyfriend for his brother? Lol. I enjoyed it for how awful it felt to watch and how the whole family bullied the main character because she was so socially inept/insecure. The escalation was incredible and the catharsis was uh....death. That has given me the impression that Christmas movies are all about dealing with family and relationship and personal problems and the way those three interact this movie really seems to be in that tradition - and I like it.

It's amazing how fucked up Harper's family is and it's amazing how much rejection and disdain and indifference and being left behind Abby is having to take. Like - damn. She's gonna have to express that soon or things will BLOW. Harper is being very stupid and selfish but I understand completely how it might come to this.

I love the chemistry between Abby and Riley - it's such a breath of fresh air - it's a GREAT contrast with the suffocating toxicity of Harper's family and their circles and etc.

Oh Harper - you fuckin dick

It would be funny if she lost her second girlfriend whom she's hiding from her family and throwing under the bus to her first girlfriend who she hid and threw under the bus.

I mean tragic of course. But I'm feeling slightly spiteful.

Kstew has SUCH great hair in this my god!

Harper you fuckin dick

I know exactly how this feels and it feels AWFUL

Harper you IDIOT you're risking your relationship you're risking it alllll

Also Abby is kinda an idiot' for lying the whole time. She's either a great liar or really Harper is wanting to believe her lies

Harper is clearly so stupid and scared all the time and also an asshole because of it. She has no space in her brain beyond : gotta make sure I make my parents proud & gotta make sure nobody finds out im gay

No band width

If I was Abby I'd be like - ok BYYYYEEEEE

Just to make her feel what she's breaking

Oh! She's actually trying to do that. Sucks u came here in your gf's car

Yes!!!! Go to her ex the only one who's treated you decently!!! HAHAHAHAHA

Jezus christ this mother....

AND hypocrisy about exes from Harper too.

Oh how the fuck could this turn out well for them ever???

LOVE how them being buddies is eating her. What has she told Abby???

Oh my god that break up HURT like HELL - so quick, so deserved, so tragic, so stupid, so awful. What a great shot. Great director.

Yeah Harper I get the shitty situation you're in but you haven't done enough I'm afraid. I mean, what the fuck was that with the friends and with Connor and letting her family and friends dismiss her roommate which means FRIEND. Yeah cos she's been trained to, yes bc she's working on 2 % brain power and the rest is spent on being afraid. BUT WHO WAS HURT IN THIS SITUATION

Yeah but it's hard not to offer comfort to a person you love when they're in pain

Ofc the fuckin sister comes in

The way they never have any privacy is really the problem

Oh god John - WHY. No no no I can't get through THIS part

'no one's supposed to know yet - we had an agreement' ???????

This is going to be........... Disastrous. Isn't it. Oh I am preparing myself in order to ENJOY these shitty parents' downfall and not feel the second hand lash of the whip

Do love how them being such shit parents sure is finally blowing up in their faces. HOORAY.

(agghhhhhhhhhhhhgggh)

Wow Sloane. Harper get her back. Just rip it all to shreds

Oh no. Nope. Harper fuckin hell. Please don't do denial. Just tell them that uhhhh her husband is cheating (is that what was happening?)

Oh NOOOOOOOOOOO

No!!!!

*office gif I can't find* NO!!!!! NO!!!

I can't seem to continue the video. Ok harden my heart. Just . Good practice. Harden heart.

Oh it keeps going. Oh fuck.

Welp. Guess you've lost it all. After all. Idiot.

Ah she was trying to go there but she never got there because she went denial first and that unexpectedly sounded really terrible. Yeah that's realistic. So in character so far. Thinks things will be simple and doesn't even imagine the hurt it causes others.

Liked the little shot of Sloane being like hmmm.....that didn't feel as good as I thought it would.

Damn these children are all horrifically stunted. Except Jane.

Jane is really wonderful and my heart hurts so much for her and she made me laugh about joining the fight. And I'm glad Harper looked stricken about what she'd done. (Once again, very in character). The thing is, I would have just pushed Sloane to the floor and screamed in her face as I shook her very violently. Pretty sure anyone untrained in martial arts would do that. But this is a film.

I like how they've basically made all these sisters equal in their parents' eyes - and destroyed their dads career in one fell swoop. Welll done! Finally some breathing room.

Oh god....that's so heartbreaking. Abby.....her parents. Christmas.... They really didn't tell each other enough at all huh

I know that John is right but it's still really hurtful though! Like goddamn

'I wanna be with someone who is ready' THAT'S AN AMAZING THING - BECAUSE THAT'S ALSO PERFECTLY VALID.

'you ok' from Riley. Wow

Harper now's the time to apologise for what you did. YES

god that was her best friend. She lost so much to this SHIT

NOOOOOOOO SHE DID IT!!!!! SHE DID IT!!!!

I'm fucking crying

Your career ruined your family's well-being! Greatttt!

THEY WENT BACK??? THEY DIDNT GO HOME??? WHAT THE FUCK LOL

I'd have just left

I guess its a good thing they didnt

Ok I guess - the - uh - I guess its cos the stress is gone but like - this also very much reads like - if you're a romantic partner you get to be important and otherwise not. Also I get why it's gotta be Mother, but this is Harper once again dropping the ball and not inviting Abby herself lol.

I knew Jane's book was gonna do well just from her brief plot description lol. So Happy John was so interested. Oh MY GOD I FORGOT HE WAS A PROFESSIONAL EDITOR. sneaky sneaky writing

I thought the height difference was gonna be awkward but so far it's actually been really cute

That was a great ending shot

THE DAD STILL WON? WOW wtf lol

OH MY GOD RILEY IS WITH THEM AT PRIDE AND SEEMS TO HAVE A GF! Those insta posts are actually a great epilogue.

[bakedpieceofchicken]

YES THIS IS @inexchangeforyoursoul‘S FAULT AND YES THEIR ART IS AMAZING WHY DONT YOU GO CHECK IT OUT ALREADY AND (EVEN THO THE POST I LINKED HAS IT) IM ALSO GOING TO LINK THE AMAZING FIC SOMEONE ELSE WROTE FOR IT!!!

Word Count: 3,173

Summary: Sako becomes unexpectedly acquainted with his colleague’s son.

notes: i have never written mr. compress in detail before this, just a warning. oh well, let’s see :^)

There was a knock on the door.

Keigo’s wings perked up in response to the unexpected noise. The little winged boy, distracted from the TV show he had been watching, stood up on the couch with both feet (dad would definitely yell at him if he weren’t asleep right now). He looked at the door--and then looked at the littered floor space between the couch and the door.

Keigo launched himself off the couch, using his wings to guide him above the floor to the door in only one magnificent leap. Alright, maybe it could be considered cheating that he was using his quirk. Nobody was keeping count, though.

Giddy that he made it (he knew he would but it still made him happy knowing he achieved such an impressive feat), he opened the door slightly and peaked his head out (just like how dad taught him)...

...to a stranger he didn’t recognize. Disappointment hit Keigo like a truck.

“You’re not mom,” Keigo told the man, frowning.

Sako blinked at Keigo, slightly startled at the sight of the child. Takami never mentioned having a son and Sako certainly never suspected the man of having one.

The boy didn’t look like his father too much but there were still some distinct similarities that made it undoubtedly clear that they were related by blood.

“I’m afraid not,” Sako said with a deeply sympathetic tone, taking off his hat and slightly bowing politely to the boy. “My name is Sako Atsuhiro. I’m a colleague of your father’s and I came to discuss work-related business with him. Is he around?”

“He’s sleeping right now,” Keigo said. “He doesn’t like being woken up.”

“...Should I come another time, then?” Sako asked. “What time would be appropriate?”

Keigo shrugged. “Sometimes he’ll be asleep for an hour and sometimes he’ll be asleep for ten.”

That did sound like the sleeping schedule of the erratic man Sako was horribly familiar with. “Ah.”

“You can come in though,” Keigo said. “If you want.” He opened the door wider this time, allowing Sako to see the absolute massive mess that was their apartment.

Used food cartons unceremoniously thrown around on the ground, empty bottles of alcohol all over the place--was that broken glass on the floor in the middle of the living room?

It was even worse than what Sako had imagined Takami’s living space would look like. He had a child living with him, for goodness sake.

“Don’t step on that spot.” Keigo pointed to the area with the broken glass. “Dad says the pieces are sharp and you could cut your feet there.”

Well, the pieces wouldn’t because Sako was still wearing his thick-soled shoes. He appreciated the kind sentiment of the child, though. It was terribly endearing and so... different from his father.

“Thank you for the warning, my boy.” Sako ruffled the child’s hair. “Do you have a name that I could call you by?”

“Takami Keigo,” Keigo answered, floating himself above the ground to the couch. The couch was nice; it was his safe spot away from the rest of the apartment. “You’re the first person I’ve met who wants to visit dad. The only other person who ever visited was mom.”

Not surprising. Sako wouldn’t consider Takami to be a very sociable man. “Where is that mother of yours?”

“I don’t know,” Keigo answered in a genuinely naive tone. “She left and then never came back.”

Sako winced at the brutal honesty. The situation had become quite clear to him, now. Sako sighed, taking another glance around the apartment filled with trash. Oh, Takami... what a failure of a father you appeared to be. This just won’t do, will it?

“Do you want to see a little trick I can do?” Sako asked the child with a wink. Keigo’s eyes lit up with interest and Sako felt pride swell in his chest for having made some form of light return in the boy’s eyes. 

“What kind of trick?”

“Well, if I told you now, it’d be spoiling the show, wouldn’t I?” Sako shouted, raising his arms in a grand gesture. He plucked the remote from the couch and turned off the TV. “Are you ready to watch the show?”

Keigo brightly smiled in anticipation. “Yeah!” He said, having appeared to be more excited than ever. He bounced in his seat on the couch, eyes locked onto Sako, and Sako was oddly sentimental about the fact that he was performing for someone else again.

“Let the show begin!”

--

“Hi, Sako-san,” Keigo politely greeted, opening the door at the sight of the man. “Dad’s not here at the moment.”

“That’s fine,” Sako said. “Do you mind if I...?”

“No!” Keigo gestured for Sako, “Come in!”

Sako stepped into the apartment, examining it once again for any changes since his last visit. Keigo ran to his spot on the couch again, looking at him expectantly.

“Are you going to do another trick?” Keigo asked. “I wanna see!”

Oh, the crushing guilt Sako felt at that moment. Of course, the boy wanted to see him perform again. He was so enraptured the last time Sako saw him--and he kept asking about how Sako pulled his tricks off. Sako replied to all those questions with the same answer: A magician never reveals his secrets!

Which made the boy quite irritated, but Sako was not a lenient man when it came to the art of his practice.

“Your father should be home soon,” Sako said after glancing at his watch to keep track of the time. “There wouldn’t be enough time, I’m afraid.”

Keigo’s face scrunched up and those wings of his drooped in disappointment. If his goal was to guilt-trip Sako even further, than he’s certainly achieved that in no less than five seconds. How keen of him to manipulate Sako’s emotions like that, intentional or unintentional.

“Well, maybe I have time for one trick...”

It was rather amazing how a child’s mood can fluctuate wildly within such a small span of time. Keigo’s wings perked up immediately and the child’s eyes lit brightly in comparison to the dullness that once occupied them. He didn’t smile, but he was visibly cheered up at the prospect.

“Watch closely,” Sako ordered the boy. He pulled out a small piece of paper and a black pen from his coat pocket. He drew a little bird and showed Keigo his drawing. It was a silly little doodle, nothing too amazing. That wasn’t the point of the trick.

He took one of the empty bottles from the floor, rolled up the piece of paper and inserted it into the bottle. Keigo watched him, observant eyes focused on the movements of his hands.

Sako then placed the bottle on the living room table in plain sight where Keigo could see it. His gloved hands blocked Keigo's view of the bottle and the bottle magically disappeared in between his hands that moved apart from each other.

“You turned the bottle into a marble,” Keigo complained. “That’s the most obvious trick you could’ve pulled off!”

“Oh?” Sako grinned deviously. “Why don’t you check what’s under your seat, then?”

Keigo blinked before hesitantly standing up from the couch and lifting the couch cushion to reveal an empty coffee can.

“Look inside,” Sako said and the man could see the realization visibly dawning upon the boy. It was quite amusing, he had to admit.

Keigo, already having a good idea of what was going to happen, shook the can and out came the rolled up piece of paper. He unfolded it and his face displayed visible shock at the drawn bird.

“No way!” Keigo shouted, jumping. He showed the drawing to Sako with a look of disbelief. “There’s no way! How did you do that?”

Sako only smirked smugly in response, causing the winged boy to huff in annoyance at the lack of verbal response. “One of these days, I’m going to figure it out! I bet you have a second, secret quirk!”

“That’s quite the theory,” Sako said. “Unfortunately, it’s not true. Ask your father if you really don’t believe me.”

“I bet dad doesn’t even know!” Keigo added. “You can’t keep it a secret from us forever!”

The door opened, revealing Takami (who was fashionably late by ten minutes). He blinked at the sight of Sako and his rather riled-up son together.

“Am I interrupting something?”

--

Takami was sleeping soundly on the armchair, snoring loudly and reeking of alcohol.

Sako had decided (against Keigo’s warnings) to try to wake the man, but the man was a heavy sleeper. He decided to give up after five minutes of trying to wake him up to no avail.

“You’re lucky,” Keigo told him. “He gets really mad if you actually do wake him up.”

“That’s how that happened.” Keigo pointed to the area with broken glass, which still had not been cleaned up. It had been weeks now.

“My, oh my,” Sako shook his head in disapproval. He took one of the plastic bags lying on the floor and started to pick up the individual pieces of the broken bottle with his gloved hands. “Do you happen to have a broom in the vicinity?”

“No,” Keigo said. “Sorry.”

It’s not your place to apologize, Sako thought sourly. He felt pity for the boy, if he had to be honest. This apartment was definitely not in suitable living condition for any children.

“Is... is there any way I can help?” Keigo asked. He bent down besides Sako and tried to pick up one of the pieces with his bare hands--

Sako grabbed him by the wrist. “Don’t,” he hissed to the boy. “You’ll cut yourself.”

“It’d be faster if I helped,” Keigo said. “I’ll be super careful, I promise!”

“No,” Sako smoothly said. “This isn’t a job for children. Why don’t you go back to watching television?”

“I’m not a kid,” Keigo argued. “Okay, I’m five. But dad says I’m really mature for my age! So I can do grown-up things too!”

“Go.” Sako swatted Keigo away. “This is non-negotiable.”

Keigo pouted and watched the TV with a disgruntled look on his face. After Sako was finished cleaning up the glass, he began to pick up the other trash that resided in the apartment. Keigo watched him with observant eyes and Sako sighed dramatically.

“Yes, you may help if you wish.”

That got Keigo scattering to pick up as many cans and bottles as fast as he could, almost as if he was playing a game with himself. The child was so fast that he was cleaning up at an even faster rate than the leisurely slow pace Sako had set for himself.

“Too slow!” Keigo taunted Sako with a grin. “Looks like I win!”

There was never any game that had been decided in the first place. Sako wasn’t one to ruin a child’s moment of victory, however. Meanwhile, Takami slept peacefully in his chair, oblivious to the world and his son who noticeably deserved a much better father.

--

Sako was a man of many talents, and cooking just happened to be one of them.

Takami was nowhere to be seen (not unusual), but Sako found that he didn’t mind. His son was a much better companion, anyways.

The child seemed to be in quite a lot of awe at his slice and dice technique. It wasn’t magic; no, not in the slightest. Keigo was impressed nonetheless.

“All the pieces came out evenly!” Keigo noted. “Can I try?”

“No,” Sako said without skipping a beat. Keigo had been trying to use his wings to elevate himself to where he could reach the knife that he left on the cutting board on the counter top, so he used a hand to force the child back down to the floor.

“No fair,” Keigo whined. “I never get to do any of the grown-up stuff.”

“You shouldn’t say things like that,” Sako scolded Keigo. “Trust me when I say that doing ‘grown-up’ things isn’t as sensational as one would make it out to be.”

“Now, be a good child and wait in your seat.”

“You can’t make me,” Keigo said. “You’re not my dad.”

True, true.

“Yes, but I’m cooking for you out of my own hospitality. The least you can do is let me work my craft.” Then, Sako had an idea.

“Think of it like this: you don’t interrupt a magician when he’s performing on stage, do you?”

“...No,” Keigo said.

“Exactly!” Sako pointed to the seat on the couch. “After you, my valued audience member.”

Keigo was rather compliant after that, waiting by the couch but his eyes weren’t on the television. He watched Sako cook with curious eyes and an even more curious mouth if the questions that slipped out of the child were anything to go by.

Ah, the innocence of youth. How Sako missed it. Keigo was a good reminder of the children Sako used to perform for.

Keigo gaped when Sako set down the plates. “Nobody’s cooked ever since mom left.”

The little smile that came with the first bite warmed Sako’s heart. He was certainly no father by any means and he never planned on ever having a child; but Keigo made him wish that he had a son he could cook for, a son that he could perform tricks for and a son that he could live for.

“Thanks, Sako-san!” Keigo chirped, looking at Sako with such appreciation and admiration in his eyes that it almost hurt to watch. 

All he did was feed a child. Apparently, that was the world to Keigo more than anything his father might have done for him in months.

--

“You’re good with kids,” Takami said. “Real good.”

“Well, I’d hope that is the case,” Sako stated. “Considering my former occupation and whatnot.”

“It’s annoying,” Takami scoffed. “That kid constantly asks about you all the time now. It’s starting to grate on my nerves.”

Perhaps if you took better care of your son, he wouldn’t be asking for my company so much then, Sako thought. He always knew Takami had a bit of a reckless side to him, but he didn’t realize how irresponsible the man could be. Especially considering the man was in charge of a little boy now.

“What do you want me to do about it?” Sako sighed. “I can’t help what the boy wants, after all.”

“I want you to stop barging into my apartment unannounced,” Takami said. “It’s my house. I never gave you permission to come and go as you please. I thought you were supposed to be the polite one.”

“I wouldn’t need to barge into your apartment unannounced if you would just keep to your word about our meeting times,” Sako said. “Ever heard of the word ‘punctuality’? No, I’m guessing you haven’t.”

Takami growled--he growled as if he had a right to be mad about the bullshit Sako had called him out on--and he slammed the can of beer he had been drinking out of against the table. “That doesn’t give you the right to speak to my son!”

Oh, how things have escalated. This was a rather troublesome development, Sako had to admit. “If it bothers you so much,” Sako had to remind himself that Keigo is not his responsibility, “then I won’t talk to your son again. Though I ask of you to make a more conscious effort to meet with me at the times you prescribe me.”

“Deal,” Takami grunted. “Glad that’s done and over, then.” The man finished the can of beer in one swig.

--

Sako tried not to let himself think about Keigo.

Keigo wasn’t his son. He wasn’t his responsibility. Yet, there was this certain guilt that occupied Sako’s mind whenever he was even reminded of the boy’s existence. It was hard to go through an entire day without thinking about the fate of the winged boy.

So, one day, Sako asked, “How’s Keigo doing?” because it was a little suspicious how the man didn’t seem concerned in the slightest about returning home despite it having been hours since he was last home.

“Oh, that little bugger?” Takami grunted. “He’s out of my hands already.”

Sako froze. “Excuse me?”

“The government took him away,” Takami said. “Keigo went and saved this group o’ kids or something and apparently one of the agents saw that he had ‘potential’ in him to become a hero.”

“Him? A hero?” It wasn’t that Keigo didn’t have potential (oh, he most certainly had potential). It was that... well...

“Yeah, well,” Takami spat on the ground, “I signed their damn contract. It’s what his mom would’ve wanted, anyways.”

“And what will you do when the boy finds out about your true occupation?” Sako asked. “Does he even know?”

“Of course he doesn’t,” Takami said. “I’m not that stupid.”

Yes, what a stupid father Takami would be if he didn’t tell his own son what his real career was. Honestly, did the man even think twice before opening his mouth to speak?

“He’s better off in their hands,” Takami rationalized.”You saw what things were like when it was just us two, didn’t you?”

Yes, and then you pushed me away from your son, Sako bitterly thought. The man had no one to blame but himself for his irrational behavior. “I suppose you’re right.”

“He’ll get a real bed now,” Takami added. “And three meals a day. I bet he’s already forgotten all ‘bout me.”

They both knew that wasn’t true. Despite Takami’s misgivings, Keigo never stopped looking up to his father. Even Sako could tell how much the boy seemed to idolize Takami no matter how much Takami seemed to neglect his own son.

“Perhaps,” Sako muttered disdainfully.

--

Sako felt like an old man when he watched Keigo--no, Hawks-- all grown up and flashing these award-winning smiles at fans who recognized him.

It felt weird to call him Hawks.

No man lives by their stage name alone--that is a dangerous ideal that most performers steer clear of. Yet, it seemed that nobody else knew the man’s real name. How peculiar, indeed. Sako wondered if that was their doing.

Irrationally, he turned to a random civilian from the crowd. How daunting he must appear, being a supposed “leader” of this new huge organization to have approached a new recruit spontaneously.

“Would you like to see a trick?” Sako asked with as much charm as he could muster up. When they agreed, Sako pulled off a magnificent card trick that seemed to stun them into silence.

Someone else, who had been observing him perform the trick (oh dear, where did this crowd come from?) asked him, “How did you... do that?”

Sako didn’t even need to answer the question himself. Oh, how that once-young boy knew him and his antics too well. Even with his face covered, the name would of course undoubtedly have been a dead giveaway (if he was more careful in the past, he would have given out a fake one).

Right on cue, Hawks was there, saying, “Don’t you know how this works? A magician never reveals his secrets!”

He taught him well. Perhaps, a little too well.

[angrylizardjacket]

i keep digging myself down deeper // charlotte&lola

Summary: Lola takes Charlotte to confront her mother after finding out that she lied about Lola’s dad’s death. Lola is plotting a murder. Charlotte is trying to fix her moral compass. They still end up in a graveyard.

A/N: tagging @misscharlottelee as always, and @local-troubled-writer . this made me so fucking sad folks. also i think lola is overall a better person in this au and im so sad about the main story too now. wrote it at work.

[run to paradise au]

“Take Charlotte,” Doc says, like it’s the easiest thing in the world, like he knows Lola’s on a knife-edge and can trust the younger woman to pull her back. He says it like he’s trying to throw a wrench in whatever malicious scheme she’s concocting that she thinks he doesn’t know about it. 

Take Charlotte. Unlike you, she’s good. Is what Lola hears, and it sets her teeth on edge. It could have been Tommy, but Doc knows better than anyone that Lola’s got that man wrapped around her little finger, though he’s the backup if Charlotte won’t go, because god knows Lola hates Mick enough to murder him on a trip out of state, and she and Nikki together will never do anything good. He could ask Vince, but that’s asking for trouble, and Vince has actually kind of settled down. Lola on a rampage is liquid heroin, and Vince is finally in recovery. So take Charlotte, somehow the only stable one of the lot.

“We’re going to pay respects to your dad, right?” Charlotte’s got a backpack full of clothes for if they stay longer than intended, and Razzle on her heels, offering to drive them both to the airport. Lola confirms. “And Doc doesn’t trust you?”

“No he does not,” Lola grumbles through her teeth, throwing a glance over her shoulder at Nikki, on the sofa wearing only his boxers, covered in scratches and hickeys.

“He’s a smart man,” Charlotte says with a smile, but Lola’s not matching her energy, just rolls her eyes. That being said, Lola’s at the very least grateful that Charlotte’s not walking on eggshells around her the way everyone else seemed to, Nikki notwithstanding, since she’d found out her father had died when she was nine, and her mother had lied about it to her, and she’d believed that he’d just left because she was a bad kid ever since.

But now she was out for revenge, had told Doc she’d just wanted to visit her father’s grave, but the moment she’d been given the go-ahead, she knew she was heading home to confront and kill her mother for everything she’d put Lola through.

When they get on the plane, Lola’s pretty sure she can see Razzle waving from the terminal, and when she points this out, Charlotte leans over her and waves back, despite Lola’s noise of disgust.

“Don’t be like that Lols, notice how I didn’t say anything about your hickeys and band aids on the way here? You look like you had a raccoon try and rip out your jugular,” Charlotte tells her with a smirk, sitting back before avoiding her gaze, “and I don’t think Nikki would give it up that hard if you were still really grieving, so what’s your real plan here?” Cutting straight to the point, she’s so unbelievably no-nonsense about it, seeing through Lola before Lola had even fed her a lie. Lola knows she could convincingly lie to Charlotte in a heartbeat, but it’s not worth the effort; either way she’d have to tell her.

“I’m gonna kill my mom,” Lola tells her under her breath, before smiling at the stewardess doing final checks, while Charlotte sits in stunned silence.

“You’re gonna murder her?” Charlotte matches her volume, though her voice is full of disbelieving rage. They haven’t even taken off yet. Lola hums in agreement. “What? Just gonna shoot her in the face? You don’t even have a -”

“A plan? Of course I do. I’m gonna burn her house down. With a flare gun,” Lola fires back easily, before adding, “shooting her is Plan B. Also with a flare gun.”

The flight is only a few hours long, and Charlotte spends it fuming in silence, not wanting to cause a scene on a plane, in the airport, or in the taxi to the hotel. There’s no words for the rage, for the betray, for the being an accessory to murder, and she’d probably fight Lola if the older woman didn’t have biceps the size of a rotisserie chicken.

Lola leaves, claiming to get dinner, and comes back with a greasy burger and a flare gun, and Charlotte wants to cry, wants to scream, wants to believe this is all a bad dream.

“You’re fucking kidding me,” is what she says, and Lola gives a patient smile.

“Charlie, please just remember she set me on fire,” and she puts the flare gun on the bedside table, puts her trash in the bin, and goes to bed.

Maybe Charlotte considers taking the gun and throwing it in the ocean. But she doesn’t. Deep down, she’s pretty sure Lola’s not capable of murder, enough that she leaves the gun there; it’s trust. Lola wouldn’t make her an accessory to murder. Probably.

“You’re only an accessory if you come,” Lola tells her over a room service breakfast, and Charlotte feels like she’s going to be sick, “go sight seeing, meet me at the airport,” she shrugs, “if the cops ask you questions, just play dumb, like you do every time they come looking for Nikki or Tommy.”

“You’re not going through with this -”

“I’ll be done by midnight,” Lola’s not usually so focused and sincere, seemingly trying to ignore Charlotte’s negativity.

“Please, Lols, don’t do this; don’t do something crazy that you’ll regret,” Charlotte almost begs her, and Lola’s teeth stretch into a snarl.

“So I’m only allowed to be crazy when it benefits you, right?” She snaps, finally, and Charlotte swallows hard, eyes going wide in surprise. “Because when we rock up to your cheating ex’s house and I’ve got a baseball bat, you can call me crazy and be proud -”

“I never called you crazy,” Charlotte says through her teeth, completely unprepared to handle Lola, who’s never actually lashed out at her before.

“No, Duff called me a psycho, and you believed him, didn’t you? But I was your psycho, wasn’t I, Miss Lee,” Lola’s voice turned cruel and mocking, “it’s okay if I’m a psycho so long as you can wind me up and point me in the direction of whoever you want fucked up -”

“After fucking everything we’ve been through, you’re gonna accuse me of just using you?”

“No,” Lola said easily, flipping from feral to collected with an almost terrifying speed, “we’re friends, Charlotte, I know this, I just don’t think you’re used to my anger not benefiting you.” Her lips twitch into a cool smile, “I think you forget that we’re very different people, Charlie; before I met you, I was blowing cops to get me and Nikki out of trouble every other week, and all that’s changed is that Nikki has started bribing his way out.” it almost seems like a point of pride, and Charlotte has no fucking idea what to say to that. “But sure, I can be crazy when we’re hurting the boy who broke your little heart,” she coos in a mocking falsetto, before her expression just turns cold, “but when it comes to the woman who abused me during my formative years and set me on fire, sure,” she rolled her eyes, miming screwing a lid on a jar, voice dripping with sarcasm, “I’ll put a lid on it, for your sake.” She spat.

“I’m sorry I don’t want you to commit fucking murder,” Charlotte blurts out, realising far too late that she’s crying, and Lola’s hard resolve instantly crumbles, “I’m sorry if it seems like I’m just, just, just using you for your anger, I didn’t mean to, I’m sorry,” and she’s just crying now, sitting in the hotel with her head in her hands, “obviously I don’t think you’re a psycho.”

“Yes you do,” Lola sighs, but it’s neither angry nor an accusation, its defeat, a label she’s worn for a long time finally spoken by one of the only people she actually respected, “and I am; there’s nothing you can do to help it.” 

“Please don’t hurt anyone, Lols, please,” Charlotte begs, and Lola heaves another deep sigh.

“Go home, Charlotte, go back to Razzle and pretend this was all a bad dream; I don’t want you living in my reality. You’re better than that.”

“You shouldn’t live in this reality; Lola, you’re scaring me, I’ve known you for half a decade, and for the first time,” Charlotte snifled, sitting up a little straighter and avoiding Lola’s dark gaze, “I’m fucking terrified, okay? You’ll go to jail for the rest of your life.”

“Small price to pay,” Lola shrugs, and Charlotte’s going from guilty to frustrated fast, but Lola’s voice turns hard, “go home, Charlotte.”

“No.”

“You’re not a felon,” Lola finally snaps, voice flat and angry, “you’re a romantic at heart with terrible taste in friends.” Finally, Lola stands, and Charlotte’s shocked into silence. 

“You’re the worst friend I’ve got,” it’s like it’s finally hit her, voice a little breathless, a little disbelieving, and Lola gives a wry smile.

“Now you’re getting it.” And she leaves. In the middle of the day. Leaves Charlotte alone and fragile in the hotel, off to do god knows what, possibly off to commit murder.

Charlotte calls Razzle; she’s never been scared of what Lola’s been capable of, maybe it’s that she’s never really thought Lola could commit murder, but now she’s afraid. The only thing that’s ever terrified Lola was her mother, and now, knowing what she knows, the truth about everything she’s been through, in some twisted way Charlotte can easily see how Lola’s made herself believe that the murder is just. Charlotte’s never known a killer, not really. Razzle reassures her over the phone, tells her that Lola’s just gone to blow off steam but that she’s got a good heart under all of it. She’s motivated by loyalty, not revenge. But then it hits them both; Lola’s mother besmirched her father’s name for years, the first person Lola ever truly loved and looked up to. The only man she’s been even more loyal to than Nikki is her father; and she’d kill for either of them in a heartbeat.

“I need to stop her,” Charlotte’s still got tear tracks drying on her cheeks when she sits bolt upright, phone still to her ear, “do I- should I call the cops?” She asks, and Razzle hesitates. It would be a betrayal that would send Lola spiraling further. 

“Go to her, you know you can talk her down; she loves you, she listens to you,” Razzle tells her, and when he says it, so sweet, so gentle, so self assured, she almost believes him, “I love you.”

“I love you too.” She tells him, before sniffling loudly, “wish me luck.” She tells him, feeling far more capable than she had minutes before; Razzle was good like that, was supportive like that, knew just what to say when Charlotte needed to hear it.

Charlotte knows the address that Lola was given, and heads there first, but the street is quiet, the house is quiet, and there were no signs of Lola to be seen. She drives for a bit down the road, heart beating in her throat, anxious and mind jumping to all sorts of terrible conclusions, but there’s no signs of any disturbance. Lola had been on foot, and had left only an hour and a half ago, she couldn’t have gotten far. 

At the end of the street, there’s a park, and Charlotte comes to realise that school must be on break, because it’s teaming with parents and children, and she searches, wonders, thinks she sees someone who looks a bit like Lola, but doesn’t stick around to make sure. That woman looks too old to be Lola. 

She checks bars and liquor stores and gas stations, and finally has a hit from a cashier who sold her two bottles of vodka, and the gas station attendant who had given her a pack of smokes, despite her having already gone through a quarter of a bottle in the half-mile between stores.

The only thing at the end of this street was a graveyard.

Lola’s wasted, unable to stand, sitting with her back against a faintly worn grave, mumbling to herself. 

“How could she do this to us, dad?” Is the first thing Charlotte hears from her, an angry growl. With one hand around the neck of a mostly empty vodka bottle, the other comes to forlornly pet the gravestone. Catching sight of Charlotte out of the corner of her eye, Lola’s entire expression crumbles, and for the first time in their whole sordid history, Charlotte watches Lola begin to cry. Angrily, almost defiantly, she searches her pockets, before pulling out a cigarette, lighting it.

“Dad,” Lola says to no-one in particular, looking out ahead instead of at her best friend, face scrunched with angry tears, “meet Charlotte,” she announces, and Charlotte’s words die in her throat; “Charlotte, meet my dad,” and she nods to the headstone she’s leaning against. 

“I thought -” Charlotte tries, but no words come to her.

“We’ve just been catching up,” Lola takes a long drag from the cigarette, coughing when she follows it with a swig of vodka.

“What happened?” Charlotte asks quietly, approaching like Lola was a wild animal. Lola grumbles something unintelligible, mostly under her breath, and Charlotte gingerly sits beside her.

“He was a really, really fucking good man,” Lola murmurs, forlorn, resting her head on Charlotte’s shoulder, startling the younger woman, who wasn’t quite sure how to deal with this situation just yet, “he would have loved them, Motley,” she clarified, and she takes another smoke, “he was always a huge fan of rock, always had the hair to match. Mom would call him a long-haired yahoo but it was never malicious, it just-” she was crying now, and she had to pause, “she would have loved them too, back then, but when he was gone, I think she just started hating everything that reminded her of him.” She pauses, taking another drink, her voice defeated when she finally spoke, “probably why she hated me so much." 

Silence, then;

"She has a kid.” Its the most defeated she’s ever sounded. Even Charlotte feels it like a punch to the gut. “She gets to play happy families, and I get to slowly dig myself an early grave,” she finishes her cigarette and immediately lights another.

“Lo, what happened?” Charlotte asked once more, and Lola turns to her, eyes bloodshot and mouth in a thin, unhappy line.

“Nothing.” It sounds like it hurts to admit, “because I’m not a psycho,” she says quietly, “I’m not gonna hurt that kid.”

“Your… sibling?” Charlotte almost winces as she says it, but Lola laughs in an almost disbelieving way, leaning her head back against her father’s gravestone.

“My little brother; Milo, I think. I didn’t stick around long… she doesn’t even know I’m here." 

Charlotte wraps her arm around Lola’s shoulder, pulls her in for a hug, and Lola melts into her, lets herself be pulled into hug, her head on Charlotte’s shoulder as she cries unashamedly. They sit on the grave of Lola’s father until it gets dark, wrapped up in each other, giving comfort and getting drunk, and there’s stories spilling from Lola that she’d never told anyone; happy times from before her shit got dark, before her father passed, stories she’d thought she’d forgotten. 

"Did you mean what you said?” Charlotte asks finally, voice fragile, vodka burning through her veins, “do you think I have bad taste in friends?” Lola contemplates for a long while before humming.

“I think you deserve better than me. And Nikki. I think you’ve got good friends, Peach and Eileen, they’re good friends,” Lola nods resolutely, “they wouldn’t drag you down to Boston just to argue with you and watch them chicken out on murdering their mom.”

“They don’t wanna murder their mom to begin with,” Charlotte agrees with a half laugh, her arm tucked into Lola’s, resting her cheek on Lola’s shoulder. Lola hums an agreement. Gently, she rests her head against Charlotte’s.

“I’m sorry, Charlie.”

They gaze out into the graveyard, tired, drunk, and world-weary beyond their years. Moments like these are a sharp reminder to Charlotte, of just how terrifying Lola’s world can be, and just how lonely she once was. The way Lola clings to the band, to Charlotte, it very suddenly made clear and perfect sense. 

“You’re not the worst friend I’ve got, Lols, not even close; you give a shit when it counts the most. About me, about our band-family; you give so much of a shit you’d kill for us. You’re probably the most loyal person I’ve ever met.” Charlotte tells her honestly, and Lola’s quiet, before sniffling loudly, and laughing.

“Stop it, Miss Lee, I promised Tommy I wouldn’t have a thing for any more of his family,” Lola jokes, but hugs Charlotte tightly as she squawks with horrified amusement. 

Its a considerable walk back to the hotel, but as Lola crashes onto the soft mattress of the bed, she feels worlds lighter than when she’d woken up.

[seolcs]

           °✧｡× :  (   moon  gayoung  +  cis  female  +  she  /  her  )   ───   welcome  to  roselake  village  ,  SEOLA  LIM  !   oh  ,  well  ,  i  suppose  you’ve  been  here  for  ALL  YOUR  LIFE  ,   so  perhaps  you  already  know  your  way  around  the  town  .   well  ,   you  are  the  TWENTY  THREE  year  old  LIBRARIAN  ,  though  ,  right  ?  the  harvest  sprites  told  me  about  you  !  they  said  you  DO  believe  in  the  harvest  goddess  .  oh  ,  my  .  well  ,  that  explains  why  they  also  said  you’re  quite  BEWITCHING  and  SEDULOUS  ,  but  can  also  be  a  bit  ENIGMATIC  and  MERCURIAL  .  either  way  ,  you  should  be  a  wonderful  addition  to  our  island  !  i  guess  i’ll  leave  you  to  it  now  ,  but  if  i  need  you  ,  i  suppose  i’ll  just  look  for  you  at  THE  MAGIC  SHOP ,  yeah  ?  we  hope  you  love  it  here  as  much  as  we  do  !  oh  ,  and  remember  not  to  go  into  the  tulsy  woods  !  the  distorted  hum  of  opera  music  just  out  of  reach  ,  dirt  caked  underneath  fingernails  ,  eyes  that  know  more  than  lips  tell  !  ✧ 

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     QUICK  STATS  !

full  name  :  seola  lim  .

nickname(s)  :  lala  (  yea  like  the  teletubby ...  it  was  a  childhood  nickname  </3  )

zodiac  :  pisces  sun  ,  virgo  moon  (  click   !  )

sexuality  :  bisexual  . 

occupation  :  librarian  &  witch  .

birthplace  :  roselake  village  ,  maine  .

current residence  :  roselake  village  ,  maine  . 

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     BACKSTORY  !  (  tw  :   vague  mentions  of  an  accident   )

she’s  a  fraternal  twin  <3  if  u  read  julie’s  intro  u  know  ,  but  seola  and  sora  are  the  daughters  of  roselake’s  mayor  !   she  was  born  a  whole  ten  minutes  after  her  sister  so  she  takes  pride  in  not  being  the  hag  ...  sora  is  so  brave  for  her  sacrifice  

so  their  dad  is  the  mayor  !  he’s  been  roselake’s  mayor  for  a  while  now  ,  keeps  getting  reelected  bc  why  fix  something  that  seems  to  be  working  right  ..  aha  more  about  that  later  ...  &  their  mom  is  a  witch  !  only  on  the  down  low  though  ,  she’s  not  open  about  practicing  magic  &  is  much  better  known  for  and  adored  for  her  philanthropy  around  roselake  !  both  sora  and  seola  have  the  ability  to  use  magic  ,  but  while  the  gift  seemed  to  come  naturally  to  sora  ,  seola  high  key  struggled  with  it  /:

their  mom  was  a  very  patient  teacher  but  that  didn’t  stop  seola  from  feeling  inferior  to  both  her  sister  as  well  as  her  powers  in  general  .  she  very  much  felt  like  a  big  flop  ,  and  as  a  kid  &  preteen  she  struggled  a  lot  with  jealousy  and  frustration  and  just  feeling  second  best  in  a  sense  ?  basically  she  really  felt  like  she  was  letting  everyone  down  when  in  reality  the  only  person  who  was  putting  pressure  on  her  was  herself 

in  good  old  2010  ...  13  year  old  seola  &  sora  snuck  into  tulsy  woods  (  even  though  their  dad  always  said  never  to  go  in  there  )  to  play  around  with  their  magic  ,  got  into  an  argument  ,  and  that’s  when  seola  accidentally  ended  up  hurting  sora  really  really  badly  ): 

after  the  accident  seola  wanted  to  give  up  magic  forever  ,  but  her  mom  convinced  her  that  the  best  way  for  her  to  get  over  her  fear  of  ever  hurting  someone  again  was  to  practice  .  so  while  sora  got  closer  to  their  father  ,  who  had  covered  up  the  accident  in  the  woods  and  used  it  to  spread  his  own  agenda  ,  seola  got  much  closer  with  their  mom  

determined  to  get  better  at  controlling  her  abilities  and  also  super  terrified  that  she’d  hurt  someone  like  she’d  hurt  her  sister  if  she  didn’t  ,  seola  practiced  and  practiced  ...  then  she  practiced  some  more  .  while  most  people  her  age  were  going  through  high  school  focused  on  going  to  college  afterwards  ,  seola  was  counting  down  the  days  til  she’d  be  free  to  do  nothing  but  learn  as  much  as  she  could  about  being  a  witch  

it  was  around  this  time  she  also  started  to  get  ...  suspicious  about  her  dad  and  his  intentions  .  she  was  grateful  that  he  didn’t  tell  the  truth  about  the  accident  ,  scared  ppl  would  have  viewed  her  as  a  monster  if  they  knew  what  really  happened  ,  but  the  way  her  dad  was  acting  about  tulsy  woods  was  super  suspicious  especially  with  everything  happening  with  the  harvest  goddess  and  the  sprites .  basically  ...  seola  suspects  he  might  have  something  to  do  with  whatever’s  going  on  in  the  woods  ... 👁️👁️

after  high  school  seola  stayed  in  roselake  !  she  didn’t  go  to  college  like  sora  ,  much  to  her  dad’s  dismay  ,  but  she  did  take  some  online  classes  here  &  there  (  mysticism  and  rituals  ,  alchemy  ,  some  history  ones  ,  as  well  as  a  medieval  monsters  literature  class  ...  just  for  fun  <3  )  she  also  snagged  a  job  at  subtext  as  a librarian  ,  mainly  for  that  sneaky  access  to  all  the secret garden  books  

initially  she’d  just  been  curious  about  her  own  magic  ,  since  she  knows  it  doesn’t  come  from  the  harvest  goddess  like  a  sprite’s  magic  does ,  but  with  everything  going  on  she’s  extended  her  research   to  include  both  the  goddess  &  the  sprites  to  see  if  maybe  she  can  understand  whatever  her  dad  is  trying  to  do  in  roselake  

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     PERSONALITY  +  TIDBITS  !

not  2  be  cliche  but  she  really  is  a  mysterious  girl  SJDBWJBDJW  since  she’s  haunted  by  the  idea  that  she’s  essentially  always  on  the  brink  of  losing  control  and  hurting  someone  again  like  she  did  with  her  sister  ,  she’s  got  a  very  elusive  personality  .  she  tries  her  best  not  to  get  too  close  with  anyone  ,  but  unfortunately  for  her  it’s  the  kind  of  cool  and  detached  air  about  her  that  usually  makes  people  curious  to  know  her  ,  especially  since  her  twin  sister  is  so  seemingly  open  &  very  focused  on  her  reputation  in  roselake  .  seola’s  always  tells  herself  stuff  like  oh  to  be  a  fly  on  the  wall  ...  😔  but  the  reality  is  she  doesn’t  want  to  be  invisible  to  people  at  all  ,  she’s  just  traumatized  from  the  accident  in  tulsy  woods  /: 

so  you  have  her  enigmatic  persona ... versus  her  deep  desire  to  be  understood  and  loved  despite  whatever  dangerous  and  uninhibited  thing  she’s  convinced  lurks  around  inside  her .  yeah  ...  she’s  not  so  good  at  following  her  own  don’t  get  too  close  with  people  rule  SJDBWJDJW  most  of  the  time  what  ends  up  happening  is  her  pushing  those  who  are  already  close  away  ,  only  to  reach  for  them  again  later  ,  only  to push  them  away  ...  you  get  it  .  it’s  easy  to  write  her  off  as  a  moody  rich  girl  if  you’re  not  in  her  circle  ,  but  it’s  deeper  than  that 

she’s  got  a  bad  habit  of  fixating  on  things  and  then  letting  them  consume  her  .  sometimes  it  works  to  her  benefit  ,  like  focusing  so  hard  on  practicing  her  magic  and  finally  becoming  good  at  it .  most  of  the  time  ,  though  ,  her  curiosity  morphs  into  obsession  ,  and  it’s  very  easy  for  her  to  get  overwhelmed  and  feel  lost 

she  has  a  big  old  soft  spot  for  creepy  or  spooky  things  and  people  ,  100%  believing  that  more  often  than  not  the  stuff  we’re  afraid  of  is  stuff  we  just  don’t  understand  .  sometimes  ,  though  ,  her  attraction  to  the  “  dark  ”  is  a  manifestation  of  her  own  internalized  belief  that  there’s  something  wrong with  her  &  that  she’s just  as  capable  of  bad  as  she  is  good  ... cannot  believe  freud  just  possessed  my  body  like  that  😳 

if  she  was  an  animal  she’d  for  sure  be  a  cat  JSBDJWBDJW  comes  &  goes  as  she  pleases  ...  affectionate  &  warm  on  her  own  terms  ...  sometimes  she  brings  people  weird  gifts  that  are  only  really  gifts  in  her  eyes  ...  yea  <3  

high  key  has  a  huge  guilt  complex  bc  of  that  juicy  unresolved  childhood trauma  !  that  and  the  fact  that  she’s  pretty  sure  her  family  is responsible  for  hurting  so  many  other’s  in  roselake  ...  it’s  a  lot  .  so  even  though  she’s  not  as  warm  and  friendly  as  sora  is  ,  she’s  just  as  kind  ...  maybe even  too  kind  sometimes  ,  she  just  feels  like  she  has  a  lot  to  prove  &  make  up  for  yk  

voted  most  likely  to  dump  you  &  say  it’s  not  you  ,  it’s  me  ):  

big  fan  of  creating  ambiance  she’s  all about  turning  of  the  big  lights  and  turning  on  a  lamp  ... maybe  lighting  some  candles  if  she’s  feeling  crazy  idk ... 

if  you  don’t  know  she’s  a  witch  you  probably  think  seola’s  about  to  drop  the  hottest  skincare  line  of  2020  because  she  do  be  collecting  those  herbs  and  oils 

━  ˙ ˖  ☆     WANTED  CONNECTIONS  !  (  all  open  to  all  genders  )

BEST FRIENDS  :  technically  sora  is  always  gonna  be  her  number  one  best  friend  🥺  but  i  would  really  love  for  seola  to  have  at  least  one  person  who  really  truly  knows  her  ,  someone  she’d  drop  anything  for  to  help  them  if  they  needed  &  vice  versa  !   

CHILDHOOD /  FAMILY FRIENDS : open  to  muses  that  grew  up  in  roselake  !  maybe  their  parents  are  friends  ,  or  maybe  they  were  just  neighbors  or  in  the  same  classes  in  elementary  school  .  i  have  ...  lots  of  ideas  for  this  trope  hehe  <3  give  me  someone  who  seola  pushed  off  the  swings  when  they  were  tiny  and  now  they’re  still  sworn  enemies  to  this  day  ...  childhood  friends  that  stayed  close  ,  but  after  the  accident  in  tulsy  woods  seola  distanced  herself ,  someone  who  was  technically  her  first  love  who  she  probably  had  a   little  wedding  ceremony  with  when  they  were  like  five  with  candy  rings  ,  childhood  friends  that  grew  apart  and  now  it’s  sad  and  awkward  ,  childhood  friends  that  stayed  close  and  have  embarrassing  stories  to  tell  about  each  other  ...  i’ll  stop  here  JSDBJWD    

CONFIDANTS  :  the  one  person  seola  keeps  finding  herself  talking   to  about  the  things  she  usually  keeps  inside  &  they  do  the  same  with  her  .  i  think  it’d  be  funny  if  both  of  them  find  it  weird  to  do  things  like  go  out  to  lunch  or  shop  together  because  that’s  not  what  they’re  used  to 

SUBTEXT  :  people  who  know  her  from  the  library  !  maybe  your  muse  spends  a  lot  of  time  there  so  they  recognize  seola  (  or  maybe  they  even  go  just  to  see  her  )  ,  maybe  your  muse  needed  help  finding  something  once  and  seola  helped  them  out  &  now  they’re  kinda  pals  ,  or  maybe  your  muse  is  someone  seola’s  requited  to  help  her  out  with  her  own  research  with  the  secret  garden  books    

FRIENDS  THAT  DATED  :  maybe  things  just  ended  amiably  between  them  ,  or  maybe  it’s  like  an  “  everyone  told  us  we  should  date  so  we  tried  it  and  boy  was  that  the  weirdest  thing  we  ever  did  ”  situation  .  either  way  the  outcome  is  they’e  still  friends  <3

CAHOOTS :  what  is  this  you  might  ask  ?  someone  seola  can  be  in  cahoots  with  .  she  has  a  possibly  dangerous  idea  that  no  one  else  is  likely  to  say  yes  to  ?  she  goes  to  your  muse  .  your  muse  has  an  idea  no  one  in  their  right  mind  would  say  yes  to  ?  they  go  to  seola  .  these  two  are  in  cahoots  !  

BAD  INFLUENCE  :  i’d  love  for  someone  who’s  trying  to  get  seola  to  dabble  into  darker  magic  /  abandon  her  quest  to  figure  out  what’s  going  on  in  the  woods  and  save  the  harvest  goddess .  she’s  pretty  hard  to  sway  if  she  thinks  she’s  doing  the  right  thing  ,  so  bonus  points  if  your  muse  is  good  at  manipulation  and  has  a  convincing  case  that’s  more  than  just  oooh  be  bad  ;)  

SPRITES  &  MAGICAL  BEINGS  :  sorry  human  muses  ...  these  are  not  for  you  </3  i  would  love  if  any  of  the  other  witches  /  wizards  helped  seola  on  her  journey  to  practice  her  magic  and  get  better  at  it  !  maybe  someone  who  knows  what  really  happened  with  sora  in  the  woods  but  still  decided  to  help  her  /  not  judge  her  ,  OR  maybe  someone  who  knows  what  she  did  and  is  now  scared  of  her  /  doesn’t  think  she  should  be  doing  magic  still  at  all  .  as  for  sprites  i  think  seola  would  be  super  curious  about  them  &  the  harvest  goddess  ,  so  maybe  some  sprites  who  are  willing  to  talk  about  their  abilities  with  her  and  their  connection  to  the  goddess with  her  &  are  maybe  even  working  with  her  to  try  and  figure  out  what’s  going  on  in  roselake  .  then  on  the  reverse  of  that  maybe  sprites  who  think  seola’s  too  nosy  for  her  own  good  ,  or  who  don’t  trust  her  because  they’re  also  starting  to  get  suspicious  about  the  mayor  ,  or  maybe  they  just  don’t  trust  any  magic  that  doesn’t  come  from  the  harvest  goddess  

MAYOR LIM  :  if  you’re  trying  to  get  to  her  father  for  whatever  reason  ,  sora’s  definitely  the  easier  ticket  in  ,  but  maybe  your  muse  is  trying  to  be  less obvious  about  it  so  they  try  through  seola  !  i  would  also  ...  really  love  someone  she  can  sneak  off  with  during  town  events  where  her  dad  is  involved  when  she’s  supposed  to  be  with  her  family  promoting  that  shiny  lim  reputation  hehe 

SISTER  SISTER  :  connections  through  sora  !  this  is  ...  always  the  best  part  of  having  a  sibling  in  the  same  rp  you  get  to  make  connections  through  them  so  give  me  all  sorts  of  stuff  it  could  be  dramatic  like  your  muse  hurt  sora  &  now  seola  hates  them  or  it  could  be  wholesome  too  !  not  2  be  cliche  but  ...  love  triangle  anyone  ...  just  kidding  ...  unless  ?  🙈  

THE  BIG  EX  :  seola’s  first  real  relationship  ,  and  first  real  heartbreak .  everyone  before  them  had  been  an  unofficial  thing  ,  but  your  muse  was  the  real  deal  .  maybe  one  or  both  of  them  ruined  it  by  being  too  scared  of  their  feelings  to  stick  around  ,  maybe  secrets  and  insecurities  got  the  best  of  them  ,  maybe  one  of  them  was  willing  to  try  but  the  other  wasn’t  .  either  way  it  ended  badly  ,  and  whether  those  feelings  are  resolved  or  not  ...  the  world  is  our  oyster  baby  !  

HOOKUPS  :  friends  with  benefits  and  it’s  not  awkward  between  them  ,  friends  with  benefits  and  it’s  super  weird  between  them  because  they  may  be  crossing  over  into  real  feeling  territory  ,  one  night  stands  /  hookups  that  were  huge  mistakes  ,  one  night  stands  or  hookups  that  were  or  are  being  kept  secret  for whatever reason  ,  someone  who  leads  seola  on  but  never  gets  serious  about  her  ,  or  someone  she  leads  on  but  she  never  gets  serious  about  because  every time  they  get  close  to  anything  real  she’s  pushing  them  away  

WILL  THEY  WON’T  THEY  :  a  friendship  that  always  teeters  on  the  line  of  something  romantic  !  maybe  they’re  both  oblivious  to  the  chemistry  /  tension  or  maybe  they’re  aware  of  it  because  they  get  jealous  when  they  hear  about  the  other  being  with  someone  else  …  maybe  they  refuse  to  do  anything  about  it  because  they  don’t  want  to  complicate  things  or  maybe  they  purposefully  cross  lines  when  they  feel  that  jealousy … could  be  more  angsty  or  it  could  be  more  wholesome  depending  on  which  way  it  goes  😈

i  wont  lie  to  u  ive  been  writing  this  all  day  ...  but  we  finally  made  it  baby  😭😭😭  im  sosososo sorry  for  the  length  &  the  wait  ...  also  i  feel  like  my  charas  always  change  a lil  once  i  actually  start  plotting  &  writing  so  sorry  again  if  u  see  me  finally  writing  as  seola  on  the  dash  and  ur  like  lit  rally  who  is  that  ... JSDBWJBDWBDJ  please come message me on discord to plot  ! @ seulgi ily ʕ´• ᴥ•̥`ʔ#8172  maybe ...  give  this  a  like  if  u  wanna  …  do  that  ?  thank  u  for  reading  all  this  ur  so  brave  for  that  stay  sexy  stan  loona x  

[things-we-used-tc-share]

Guiding Light

Warnings: Coming Out, Struggles with sexuality and gender, religion

Ship: Remile

Plot: Remy is struggling to come out, but he bites the bullet anyway, reinstating that throughout everything he has always been, to Emile, the bravest person he’s ever known. 

(In which Emile is a flowery British boy and Remy is a badass Maltese and Catholic trans man)

--

“Relate to my youth,

Well I’m still in awe of you,

Discover some new truth,

That was always wrapped around you,”

-Guiding Light, Mumford and Sons

--

Remy has always been bad at his religion. Growing up on a small island in the Mediterranean infamous for its lack of giving a shit about everyone else’s feelings, he’d entered professional boxing in which he’d kicked the shit out of other people at the age of twelve. He was good at fighting, he enjoyed fighting. Growing up with a female body in a world full of men, being able to fight was a good thing. Yet, the realization that he’s not a girl still came with its shocked in the perspective of Catholicism. 

He’d met Emile whilst studying abroad, the two had clicked very well despite Remy’s rather clumsy, heavily accented English of which, only really became clumsy because the cutest, most wonderful ray of sunshine of a boy, with bright blue hair started to talk to him about saving the environment. He forgot how to speak for a few seconds, his brain hitting panic mode with those bright blue eyes staring at him through rose tinted glasses. When he finally spoke his words came out in the wrong order. 

Emile taught him a lot about gender and sexuality that he did not know, in multiple ways, as well as the idea that his religious identity didn’t have to clash with his sexual orientation and gender. In turn, Remy taught Emile self-defense and also the main ways to stun and/or knock out someone. 

Emile likes flowers, he believes the world is a God in its own right. Remy believes God is a person but at this point, he’s leaning to the idea that God has to be a woman because men don’t create things as beautiful as Emile. The elder, full of roses and pastel cardigans, was a beautiful breath of fresh air in a toxic world. And the younger, whose outfits consisted of leather and ripped skinny jeans, clashes brilliantly next to him.

The definition of opposites attract.

And now Remy can’t stop fidgeting on the plane, toying with the short black stands of his hair and fidgeting under the warmth of his binder. He’d tried writing a text, anything, but nothing felt right. Somehow he feels just a little bit braver with a glass of JD down his throat and Emile holding his hand. 

His parents greet him at the airport. His father is ex-navy, chubby and jovial, with his hair thinning and skin dark, his mother a brown-haired woman with a kind face and much lighter skin. They greet their son with hugs and warmth, and Remy has to try not to think about the fact that this love may wear off soon and that it comes with terms and conditions that he’s never read. Suddenly, life is a Twitter account and he’s never once checked the Terms of Service.

“You’re shaking,” Emile whispers as they trail behind Remy’s parents “Breathe,” They at least, already love this flowery man with vines and roses tattooed up his arms and now bright purple curls. Meeting Emile is usually a test to people’s conservatism, he’s hardly a picture of societal masculinity. 

No, Emile is far too kind to conform to society.

Remy helps his dad with the cases and holds the door open to the car for Emile because they’re used to this rhythm in their relationship. Emile would do anything to make the other man’s life easier but he’d have to beat Remy to it first.

Sat around the dinner table, they say grace the way they do every time they sit down for dinner. Remy has to admit it’s been so long since he’d prayed but he’s thankful now he has the chance because if there’s ever a time to beg God for help it’s now. Eating, his father asks him through his deadname how University is going, if his studies are progressing. “Top marks all around,” He replies with a smile that chews on a name he’s not heard in a couple of years. “Doing great,”

“And how’s your mental health doing, sweetheart, you told us you were seeing a doctor over there?” Remy smiles and nods.

“Good, I started medication for it,” His mother smiles, pleased with his answer.

“Always happy to hear my baby is happy,” She beams as she digs into a meal she prepared. Traditional family roles, but not really forced, his dad tried very hard to cook and he could...basic meals. His mother had been raised by a chef and her cooking was one he’d pay millions to eat. She’d always said the fastest way to a man’s heart is through their stomach and as far as his dad was concerned, she was not wrong. Remy’s dad loved food, he loved trying to make it too. Remy inherited his father’s love for food and also his mother’s ability to cook it so it’s a win-win situation.

His dad had taught him how to fight instead, taught him how to stay active, to fend for himself. People always used to tell his dad that his weight would get in his way, but he’s one of the healthiest men Remy knows. He’s active, loves to walk, he’d never been skinny and could still kick ass. Remy adores his dad. And his mum. 

He and Emile help his mum do the dishes whilst his dad clean up the kitchen tops and table. When they sit down to watch TV, Remy finally decides he can’t handle a moment longer of their love if it’s only on one condition. 

“Ma, Pops, there’s something I need to tell you,”

There’s a moment of silence as he stands up and Emile gives him a small smile but for the first time in his life...Remy feels so small, so powerless, so afraid. Tears are already in his eyes as the TV is muted and all eyes are on him, he can see the understanding on his mother’s face before he’s even opened his mouth. “I’ve been trying to...to figure out...” He stammers, stumbles, every word he’s ever known both in his native tongue and English vanish completely. “I’ve been trying to figure out how to tell you, I wanted to tell you before I went to university, I wanted to tell you via text or email and now I just can’t handle not telling you,”

Tears track his cheeks and he chokes on his words. Even as a child he’d never been much of a crier, he very rarely cried at all but then again his parents had always loved him so much and he’d always been quite spoiled despite the little money they had. “I’m not a girl,” He can’t breathe. “I’m a boy,” He really can’t breathe, he feels like he’s choking, the weight of the cross around his neck is digging into his skin. 

“Oh honey,” His mum smiles, standing up to wrap his arms around him “I’ve had a feeling this day would come,” He bursts into tears against her, feeling like a child all over again as he gasps for breath “When you were little you used to say to me ‘mama I don’t want to be a girl,’ and for a while I thought it was simply because it’s a man’s world and you understood that too much,” He shakes a little, his legs feeling weak. “But as you got older I understood a little more, I even did research because there isn’t much here to help me understand,” Remy sniffles and wipes his eyes, exhaling shakily. “But no matter who you are, or what you are, you are always my child, and I will always love you, I love you more each and every time I learn how you’ve grown,”

Remy’s dad stands up, his face with a firm look as he holds out an arm for his son. “God makes no mistakes, son,” He says gently “You are who you are because of how he made you, and that is how he wanted you to be,” Remy nods against the other man’s chest “And you will be a better man than I could have been, back in my day they used to make more fun of people like you, it always felt wrong but I would never try to defend, as I got older I realized I should defend, and you, you are braver than I could have ever been because you embrace who you are despite what people may tell you,”

Emile smiles at the family, legs crossed as he leans his elbows on his knees and chin rested against the palm of his hands. “And you, son,” Remy’s father turns to him as he looks up at older man “Thank you for taking good care of my kid, we worry sometimes with,” He takes a moment to correct his own mind “Him, being so far away, but now I know for certain he’s in good hands, and you are always welcome to our table, I don’t care what your sexuality is, or where you come from, or who you worship, unless you want to talk about that is, I’d love to get to know my son’s boyfriend more, of course, it’s only proper, but you are always welcome here,”

Emile nods “Thank you, sir,”

“I go by Remy now,” Remy says quietly “It’s what people call me,” 

“Remy, I like it, very Latin,” His mother beams that motherly smile, her eyes full of tears and pride and warmth. “You know I’m a fan of good French names, you stuck to the theme,” Remy laughs and nods, wiping his eyes. 

And Emile, Emile who had been there through the confusion and fear and worries. Who had sat through every written and deleted text for the past two years, he couldn’t have been prouder at that moment. With his boyfriend wiping his eyes and nose and blinking his big brown eyes full of care over at the other man, a quiet thank you on his lips. Remy would always be the person he looked up to the most, not fearless but full of fear and he lets it drive him through every moment of his life. Not without Anxiety, to brimming with it, and despite that he was still brave in the face of it. 

Remy really would forever be his guiding light, the precedence set for his own bravery. And, the love of his life.

--

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