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thurio-edau · 5 months

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SBG GANG MENTAL ANALYSIS

yup, him for part two. funny thing despite Aiden being my favourite character I'm most excited for the other three posts I'll make, especially the last one. there's a lot to unpack here so

also im writing this with a migraine pls read it-

Part 2: Aiden Clark

ah, yes. the obviously-mentally-ill from the start fan favourite Aiden Clark. let's go.

first, I want to start with something I find really important about his character, what makes him heavily mischaracterized in the fandom. the 'psychopath' cliche.

the terms 'psychopath', 'insane' and 'unstable' are often confused with each other due to media stereotypes, such as Aiden here. one, he is not a psychopath. psychopath literally means a self-centered person who lacks sympathy, affection and care; making them far from most other characters in their franchise. their lack of sympathy/empathy often makes them criminalized, here

disturbing content warning, for an example of a psychopath.

let's take Gressil from Homesick for example since a lot of SBG readers also read Homesick. so, here, Gressil is a perfect example of an actual psychopath. his lack of empathy makes him torment others, he's very self-centered. and when asked why he's doing this? he says he was bored. let's look at Aiden here. what does Aiden do when bored? probably dumb ideas or annoy Tyler. not torturing people for fun. Aiden is just a boy who likes thrills, but he has a sense of empathy, care and justice.

you wanna see a psychopathic Aiden?? the canvas is it

(our local Logan hater is publishing the canvas eps go checc beachy out)

but that's him, not our Aiden. canvas does not equal originals y'all

alright, now since we got that cleared out!! firstly, ADHD.

I think everyone in the fandom is already aware that Aiden is ADHD but I'm still going to talk about it just like Ashlyn's autism. Red has also said that she wrote Aiden with ADHD in mind but hadn't canonically confirmed anyone as neurodivergent. let's start with the main symptoms of ADHD, also known as Attention Decifit and Hyperactivity Disorder.

I know about 5 different ADHD people myself and did some research, it probably won't be extremely accurate since I'm not ADHD myself, but I'll try to do whatever I can. first with the AD part, Attention Decifit.

now as seen, he doesn't exactly have any problems with theorizing itself. but the problem is that his attention just goes away easily.

i mean cmon bro was making memes on the job

he tries to do work, but can't. he has a low attention span which makes him not able to concentrate. he can't keep it up for long, he'll get distracted or bored too easily about things that doesn't interest in specially.

it's just distracting. what his attention is on constantly changes, there's more to that after the ADHD part but we're here for now.

the hyperactivity... it's a lot more apparent. but I should explain the insane-unstable thing before that.

insane means that someone's mental health is not in an okay situation, where it prevents the person from thinking normally, acting rationally, very often found together with delusions. the person is seriously mentally ill where it might count as a disability.

unstable, however, where someone is prone to psychiatric problems, has moodswings etc. they're not exactly the most sane person, but they aren't insane either. Aiden here, obviously falls on the unstable side. maybe just a little bit insane if you squint. this will be brought up later too, but it mixed well with his hyperactivity too.

and as we all know, our boy isn't exactly the most stable person. (sorry for the collages, but since there is a tumblr picture limit i have to keep on collaging. yes i learnt from the last time) his hyperactivity mixes with his unstable mindset which makes him incresingly vulnerable to danger- which he likes. from when the first shift happened, he's been really careless about stuff but it's been all about his love for thrill.

and it irritates Tyler, too.

the main subplot about his character is that he's a person of excitement. guess what? ADHD people like the excitement, they like new things, they like the adrenaline and thrill. now, Aiden's main characteristic of being unstable mixed with ADHD makes him an even more reckless person. another thing mixing with the hyperactivity, is boundaries.

this part will mostly be about Ashlyn since the boundary issue only happens with her.

I talked about this on Ashlyn's side on my Ashlyn analysis, now it's time for Aiden's side.

he's really annoying to her at first. Ashlyn is someone with lots of boundaries, like high walls. and who tries to climb them with his dumbass? Aiden of course.

she kept rejecting his efforts to befriend her for some time, until the night they stole the jeep. then she managed to actually bring the walls down, and accept them all into her life. but damn was she blunt.

felt that honestly

and Aiden understands her that night, too.

Ashlyn was hesistant to hug him, yes, he was aware. but she still did which made him realize she was also trying. i have to tell you, people with ADHD and people with autism either have trouble getting along, or go perfectly well. my ADHD sibling for example, I have to push them away for a lot and tell them to lower their voice. but once they remember my boundaries it actually becomes a normal, even pleasant hangout. which, Aiden realizes and tries to get along with. he tries.

seeing his efforts on her boundaries makes something click in her mind. and she starts to be a lot nicer when they hang out in the arcade.

Aiden eventually learns and remembers what she's like and what she loves to do. he already tried to watch her ballet sessions once -got slammed-, he's been to her room where he remembered the mat from and her fighting makes it obvious. I'm sure he knew he'd get cooked by betting that. but he still did,

because he knew it'd interest her. which he succeeded, he saw her smile again. the arcade day went great until Barron and his gang pulled up, but if we ignore that part it all went well. Aiden started to understand and respect her boundaries.

anyways then Tyler fucking dies

he knows that Ashlyn feels guilty. Aiden wants to comfort her through it, but also do it correctly. without going over any boundaries. which makes him really,

really,

really surprised when she responds.

also including this pannel cause its hilarious

here we see that he's still trying. hell, I'm sure he spent minutes thinking if he should come close physically to help her. that's probably why he just nudged her softly before anything else. he's not used to it, he has to conciously make an effort to not cross said boundaries. keeping his voice lower, try to not be so reckless, not doing anything physically close unless she reciprocates. wow how i wish another someone i knew irl tried that hard instead of blaming it on me cOUGH COUGH COUGH

also other small things to include

he's yapping a lot

he has a comically large amount of puzzles in his backpack for one single trip

and sticks his head into lamps for some reason

but that's just Aiden and his little neurodivergent brain for ya.

now the part I wanted to get to the most.

Borderline Personality Disorder.

first, what is Borderline Personality Disorder?

shortened as BPD, borderline is when someone's mood is inconsistent and swinging. think of it's name; the person's mental state is in the border, in the border line, switching up fastly. the most easily understood and common type is when the person goes from a depression to a happy state. but no matter which state they are in and/or go to, one thing stays the same: it is unstable.

one thing about borderline is that it is frequently mixed with bipolar. however bipolar is a neurodivengercy which means it is what someone is born with and cannot be changed. but borderline is obtained later in life. it usually happens with depression. bipolar is much more random and the episodes last longer in comparison. it may last up to hours, and the person's memory might have trouble remembering their episodes. borderline, on the other hand, is a short-lived mood swing.

now here. here's the catch; people with BPD during mood swings can have reckless behaviour, suicidal thoughts -in his case as far as we know, lowered sense of protecting himself- or a loss of understanding danger. sounds familiar?

borderline's recklessness and dangerousness, sometimes self-destructive acts combines with ADHD's love for thrill and excitement, combined with Aiden's own personality all make up for a great condition of instability.

Aiden's behaviour constantly goes crazy, I think his most frequent mood swing might be his normal self (at least, as normal as he could be) to this more maniac way of acting. I noticed it from his eyes, when he's in a more calm-ish normal state his pupils are a bit more dilated. in the pictures above, you can clearly see that he's still in the episode; filled with the adrenaline, the unstable way of thinking.

but, what causes that? surely a mental illness such as borderline doesn't happen on it's own.

right?

cause it didn't.

it never works that way.

but it can get better.

eventually.

but what happened to him?

personally, as much as a large amounnt of people seems to believe it's something like family abuse I don't think so. maybe neglect, maybe withdrawal, maybe maybe. but we've seen his parents. I don't think they would hurt him like that. I can't put any more pictures, but this is the last part anyway. his parents seem to be kind and gentle, despite that picture in his house. I'm thinking the picture was only for the dramatic effect. his parents said that he used to be really calm and quiet during Lily's birthday, and both Aiden and Ben seem comfortable around them. they were happy taking Ben in too, any kind of abusive parent wouldn't do that at least that's what I believe. also there is that Aiden got serious and concerned when he learnt that their parents were also in the facility, most likely worried for his own as you would have thought.

there was a post that I've been trying to find for like half an hour, I commented on it but I can't find the post now. the person talked about their own theory. if I remember correctly it was that when Aiden was depressive as a child, his parents took him to a thrilling activity like the ones he's been talking about (bungee-jumping, skydiving etc.) and the thrill made him actually get excited. which is why his parents allowed him to go even more reckless, because they are aware of how prone their son could be to the depression.

what happened? let's ignore the parents factor. someone can have a loving family and still be traumatized, someone can be taken care of and still feel abandoned, someone can never have confronted a situation they are terrified of.

one of my theories is that, the loneliness. it must get to a child heavily considering children need to not be left alone, but Aiden was. he didn't have any actual friends since they always moved from one place to another from his parents' business, and they might have not had enough time to make for him (which I believe is bullshitting, every child deserves to be taken some time out for. some people quit their jobs entirely for their child.) and be unaware, and that doesn't change that he was still depressed and alone. his depressive state was seemingly before Ben was taken in. now here one thing with borderline, at least from my experience, is faking actions. smiles, laughs, friendships, conversations... almost as if there's two different lives; one fake, and one real. you keep on switching, you keep on swinging between the sides where you're yourself and where you're just mimicking 'normal human behaviour'.

it starts from faking a happy state during their depression, and by time you're faking it it becomes an automatic adition to your personality. to your mind. once it furthers, it becomes the disorder. Aiden we see is always smiling. it becomes a habit that only breaks sometimes. now, I'm not saying his smile is fake- I think his face is literally just stuck like that. it breaks ever so slightly sometimes. fake it till ya make it yanno? that kind of thing. and when he swings from his calm mood to his borderline-d mood, his pupils get small and his smile gets worse. noticably worse. I'll be rereading the series (AGAIN) and this time look at all the small details since Red loves putting them and I love theorizing so

which, wraps up the Aiden thing! im actually really proud of how i could put my thoughts into text which i never could. i'd love any additions because i love other opinions as well.

and you know what? im glad Ash and Ai are out of the place because the rest are what I'm actually looking forward to >:)

...and i should sleep. really.

(wow sorry yall i finished this hours ago and said 'alright reread to make sure its good before sleep' and fell asleep through it lol sorry for 4 hour delay ig)

(leaving for school rn see yall 8 hours later 🫡)

#sbg #sbgblr #sbg (webtoon)#school bus graveyard #school bus graveyard webtoon #schoolbus graveyard #aiden clark #ashlyn banner #sbg aiden #sbg ashlyn

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1moreff-creator · 8 days

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EP 13 Revision: Trying to Solve the DRDT CH2 Murder

Back in my bullshit I go! So, episode 13, what a chapter! Really made my old murder theory seem unlikely, so let’s see if there are any convincing alternatives, shall we? As a heads up, most of my theory actually remains the same, a lot of this is just me going over some other possible alternatives. Although I’m also going to talk about what happened to Ace as well, and that theory has changed quite a bit.

Spoilers up to CH2 EP13. CW Murder, hanging, strangulation, asphyxiation, Eden!Culprit, Ace!Culprit, Nico!AceAttacker, blood, mention of Xander losing his eye.

You don't exactly need to know what my previous theory was to understand this post past the “Murder Method” title, but it might help, so here's Levi!Accomplice anyways. Speaking of:

How Dead We Talking?

Levi: In that case, we should be suspicious of those who *do* have an alibi in the evening but not in the morning.

Levi: Then, did the killer perhaps use some sort of mechanism to hang Arei?

These lines in particular, especially combined with some other dubious lines in the past, make me very doubtful Levi!Accomplice is the right answer. An obvious presumption of this theory is that Levi would want Eden to win the trial; if he didn’t, he’d just call her out and explain everything. Even if he just gave her the fish, I think he’d have said that by now. But these lines have Levi actively pointing people towards the right culprit (if it’s Eden) or the right method. You could read this as him choosing to betray Eden after Hu’s speech, yet still hesitant to fully reveal his involvement. However, given he willingly admitted to his secret because he considers honesty good and wants to be a good person, it seems weird that he’d keep being disingenuous and hiding evidence from the cast.

There’s also this statement:

Levi: But it is a “good” thing to make sure someone else doesn’t die, even if I personally do not care about the outcome.

Of course, you could read this as him wanting to save the life of the person he considers the “most good,” that being Eden, but the problem is he also admitted to seeing other participants (such as David) as good. I’m not fully opposed to stretching dialogue to fit certain theories (I still believe venus-is-thinking’s explanation of Eden’s breakdown after the Arturo story in the trial works well enough not to disqualify Eden as a potential culprit, for example), but I have my limits. A lot of what Levi said in his speech and beyond reads a bit too strangely for me to really consider Levi!Accomplice as likely as I once did.

Is it 100% dead? No. There is the ticking clock motif in the background, and some of Eden’s reactions to Levi’s speech could be read as pointing towards this, but I feel like that might just be a “foils” thing? Like, the person with quote unquote “bad” thoughts that does good things, contrasted with the person with quote unquote “good” thoughts that does a pretty bad thing (if Eden killed Arei).

(Disclaimer: there’s no such thing as “good” and “bad” thoughts and feelings, it’s your actions that determine whether you’re good or not, Levi’s a good person even if he has low empathy, you know this)

In any case, while there’s a world out there where Levi!Accomplice is still the right answer, just in case, let me throw out a few more theories on how this could work. Unfortunately, I can’t come up with any answer that solves every mystery of the case as well as Levi!Accomplice does, which is why I still consider it possible, but I’ll do my best.

Murder Method - Hey, I Wasn't That Wrong!

The things discussed in this chapter halfway confirmed a lot of what I speculated about the method itself (assuming Teruko isn’t wrong, but I feel the trial would flow a bit weird if she presents one relatively good theory and then backtracks). The killer used the spinny thing as a pulley to pull Arei up to the ceiling, using the rafters and the seesaw (yo the seesaw WAS important, Korekiyo fans winning!) to set up the mechanism. After Arei was high enough, they tied the rope to one of the handlebars so it would tense before Arei hit the ground, and let go. To make sure her neck would break instantly, they also attached water jugs to her in order to increase her effective weight. To avoid the rope sliding off the handlebars, they used tape with a sandpaper-y texture that makes it easier to grip. In other words, the tape from the gym. It is also implied the killer splashed Arei with water, either accidentally or to hide her body temperature.

I got… most of this right. I didn't catch the seesaw thing, nor the splashing with water thing, and I didn't fully realize the purpose of the tape, plus I thought the killer would have used a second piece of rope attached to the swing set as a "stopper" instead of tying one long piece of rope… but the main pieces are there!

The last few details haven't been discussed yet, but I still think they're solid. To get the rope over the rafters, they tied one end to something like the ball of clothes (or any equivalent) and threw it over the said rafters. On the way, they accidentally hit the lights, displacing them and causing it to break and start flickering.

(How many posts can I fit this image into? Watch it be wrong, too)

The rest is simple. Arei's wrists (and possibly feet) were bound by the tape after something happened to scuff the floor. That's actually a sticking point of the old theory: figuring out exactly how those specific scuff marks would form.

I've always just taken them as evidence of some kind of struggle, but how do they form? Well, they look like either tire tracks (which I'm gonna assume are impossible) or, perhaps, clawing at the floor.

Since the old "struggle" no longer applies, I'm going to take a shot in the complete dark and speculate, with practically no evidence, that the struggle is: The killer managed to tackle Arei to the ground from behind, Arei falling stomach first, and either strangled her with the rope or smothered her with the ball of clothes (because evidently I just like to throw this thing at any unsolved mysteries I can, sometimes literally) until she lost consciousness, but no more. Arei clawed at the floor while this was happening, generating the scuff marks.

(I am assuming the rope is long enough to do this even with the mechanism already set up, which it should be)

Now, you might be thinking that there’s a method I’m leaving out, that being the turpentine. Since DRDT’s turpentine can apparently knock people out, isn’t it possible she was knocked out with it?

Well, actually. If the method Teruko describe is accurate (which for the purposes of this post, I’ll assume it is), Arei cannot have been knocked out with turpentine.

Why? Because of the marks on her wrists. The ones that imply they were bound by tape at some point.

Why is this a problem? Simply put, turpentine’s too good to need the tape around Arei’s wrists. In the Ace case, Ace was unconscious for quite a while; however long it took to set up the murder mechanism, and a little after Eden and Teruko entered the room. Translated to Arei, if the killer knocked her out with turpentine in the playground, they would easily be able to put the noose around her neck and do the pulley trick before she woke up, making the tape redundant.

This leaves us with three options if Arei was knocked out with turpentine. Either Arei was knocked out outside the playground, at which point you’d need a different explanation for the scuff marks on the floor; the killer didn’t know how long turpentine induced unconsciousness lasted; or the killer was extra cautious for some reason. Notably, those last two would imply the killer is different from the Ace attacker, since Ace’s wrists were never bound as far as we can tell, and at that point you need to explain how they got the turpentine in the first place.

Compare that to unconsciousness induced by asphyxiation. Although it could take up to two minutes to knock Arei unconscious, consciousness is regained around ten seconds after pressure is relieved in cases of asphyxiation. That’s too quick for comfort, since if Arei regains consciousness before the rope takes her off the floor, she would easily be able to slide the noose out of her neck.

That means the killer would need to tie her hands to make sure they could pull off the pulley trick without issues, which explains the marks on the wrists.

A note on the asphyxiation thing; I think even a weaker person could realistically pull this off if they caught Arei by surprise. From what I understand, it’s difficult to meaningfully resist against strangulation from behind, so even if Arei is stronger than her killer, it’s a plausible method. However, I could be wrong about this. It might shock you to know this, but I'm not very well versed in the logistics of murdering people.

Also, you might say that that's insane. Why do all the mechanism stuff if they had already asphyxiated her unconscious? And while that is a very fair question, there is no way to eliminate it. Keep in mind Arei's wrists were bound at some point, but the mechanism was still used. No matter how the tape got around Arei's wrists, there will always be a time when the killer could have killed her in a very simple manner (eg stabbing her, strangling her, bludgeoning), and still chose to complicate the method.

There are a few reasons that could be, but I currently believe this is related to what Teruko brings up at the end of EP 13. The mechanism is similar to the one used to try to kill Ace. This way, the killer could point to the superficial similarities as a way to pin the blame on Nico. Or the killer straight up is Nico and they're just obsessed with this method for some reason lol.

Oh, also, Arei’s missing a glove. I assume the killer removed it to better apply the tape on the wrists and just… have it in their pocket, I guess. I really don’t know what to make of this thing.

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Side Note: The Ace Case

I said in my first reaction to EP13 that I would review the Ace case method. Since I don’t feel like making a separate post, I’ll tackle it here. We basically got one piece of evidence regarding this: Teruko believes there was either a hanging or a pulley involved.

Now, you might know this case is actually lot harder to figure out than the Arei one. The first time I tried to come up with a method, alongside venus-is-thinking, accirax and thebadjoe, we went kinda insane. There's a lot of really weird evidence in the short investigation we got, which led us to creating gym-wide wire circuits, crucifying Ace, giving Eden the turpentine, hypothesising about wire yo-yos and on-off switches for the fans, and who knows what else. As fun as that was, there was surprisingly little hanging and pulleying in that thread, and now that Teruko's implied the Arei method is somewhat similar to the Ace method, we might be looking at not-great answers.

And because this method is so difficult, I’m not very confident in the answer I’m about to give. I think it’s better than what I had before, but there’s still a few questions. I’m not too bothered by this though, since we’ll get answers in a few days anyways.

First thing to clear up: I firmly believe Nico did everything by themselves. The killer needed the turpentine to knock out Ace; Nico never denied taking the turpentine when accused, and straight up admitted they “made a serious attempt on Ace’s life.”

Rose: They even lied to and stole from me to commit murder. Out of everyone here, they’re the least innocent.

Nico: I—! I didn’t kill Arei! I swear!

Charles: But did you not intentionally try to make a serious attempt on Ace’s life? Answer honestly.

Nico: Y… Yes…

Then, when speaking about what they did, they always speak in first person singular, never giving any indication there was anyone else involved.

Nico: I didn’t… think about [the trial after the Ace thing]… I… I never should have… done that…

Not to mention they were in the gym, alone, with their cloak off, and they had the most motive for killing Ace. They’re the only person we know for sure had the opportunity to grab the turpentine, they said they were going to kill Ace before this happened, etc. You can certainly twist all of this in some way to make Nico not the sole culprit, and I respect those theories, but for me, the most compelling explanation is the one that makes the least amount of assumptions. That the guy that admitted to trying to kill Ace and implied they did it on their own, tried to kill Ace on their own. Occam’s Razor, and all that.

Plus, if there’s anyone else to blame, most people point to Hu. But…

Hu: It is not and never will be your decision as to what happens with our lives.

Note: The next part has been slightly edited, as I feel my original wording was poor

I don’t see Hu as the Ace attacker. There’s too many lines that (in my opinion) you have to really stretch to make it plausible, and while I’m not entirely opposed to doing such things (spoilers, I still believe Eden!Culprit), I’m only fond of doing them when there’s physical evidence to back up the claim. The dialogue can be interpreted in different ways, but I just do not see any real evidence Hu was involved in either crime this chapter.

Edit over

Yes, Hu’s wire is there, but Nico already stole one custom weapon from a friend, why wouldn’t they steal/borrow a second one? Even if they didn’t straight up ask for the wire, Hu claims she and Nico ate breakfast in Nico’s room, so it’s not difficult to assume Nico could have gone into Hu’s room at some point and gotten the wire that way. It’s also true Hu never calls them out on this, but that’s because she never saw the crime scene; even if she knows Nico had the wire, she probably wouldn’t immediately assume it was used in the murder.

Again, theories where Nico isn’t the sole culprit are perfectly valid, but I personally don’t believe them. I may get proven wrong by the end of the week, but oh well.

Aside from that, let’s make a quick recap of the evidence we have. Ace’s body and wounds; bloodstain on the wall; lone wire; fan wire; broken fan; moved benches; stool (brought from storage?); broom (pulled right out of Ace’s ass-); fallen weight rack; isolated weights; non-functioning fan; clean pull-up bar; Rose’s and Teruko’s account (Nico took the turpentine and used it to knock out Ace); banging noise; Nico’s missing cloak.

(Btw; I talk about the lone wire and the fan-wire as two completely separate things, since it makes things easier. Just assume Nico broke the wire before the murder attempt)

The first thing to note is that hanging Ace actually solves a particular point of contention from the first thread; Ace’s wounds. Because of the way Ace always grabs the front of his neck in the sprites after waking, some of us thought there were only injuries on the front. Meanwhile, others posited there were wounds all around Ace’s neck, based on the sprite and the blood on the wall.

But hanging offers an interesting middle ground. The wire tensing around Ace’s neck could cause injuries on both sides, but if Ace was slumped over, the injuries on the front would be deeper because gravity. I think? I’m no expert on hanging, might need Whit to confirm that one for me. But it’s conceivable, so I’ll go with it.

But we can’t just hang him simply. If you check the first thread, you’ll remember that by far the weirdest piece of evidence is the blood pattern on the wires. It stops and starts in weird places, as seen below:

This is difficult because it means the wire wasn’t continuously wrapped around Ace’s neck as you might expect. However, you might also remember one of the only explanations I have for the lone wire’s blood pattern; a noose pattern.

If the lone wire is tied in a way where Ace’s neck bleeds over the know but not the noose, the pattern is explained.

But how do we work a noose into the hanging? Well, a yo-yo. I’m kidding, but only kinda; you can put the noose around the isolated weights to weigh down Ace, making the hanging… more fatal? Look, I don’t know why Nico did half this shit, okay?

The big thing that’s left are the actual logistics of hanging Ace. It’s a lot harder than you might assume, and while I’m probably vastly overcomplicating it, I wanted to put the broom somewhere and this might be the bests place for it. So, taking inspiration from badjoe’s idea of using the broom to stabilize Ace, my own yo-yo theory, and venus-accirax’s general idea of crucifixion, I present to you:

A brand new murder diagram!

(Btw, didn’t mention it, but the fan can’t be spinning for this to work. Either there’s an off switch or Nico just broke it with the broom and then put it back more or less)

As you can see, the main trick is putting the broom across Ace’s jacket, going from one sleeve to the other stick-first, and then using the wires to lift it up (first the one on the pull up bar, then the one on the fan), wrapping them around Ace’s neck in the process. This allows Nico to keep Ace upright and with his neck as close to the ceiling as possible while putting the wires where they need to be. The lone wire is attached to the pull-up bar. Not pictured is the stool, which Nico probably needed to pull this off, btw.

After setting this up, it’s just a matter of pushing the broom out of Ace’s jacket. This would cause Ace to fall, tensing the wires (I’m hoping the pull-up bar is higher on the wall than it looks :v) and toppling the bench he was on. Sort of. The exact location of these things escapes me a bit.

After that… it’s possible Ace falling immediately caused the fan to fall, or the fan held for a moment, and this moment is when Nico got their cloak out of the gym. Maybe?

In any case, the fan collapses, the lone wire rips the tape out of the pull-up bar as it flies off, and Ace falls backwards. I’m hoping he’d be close enough to the wall to fall in a way that makes the back of his neck stain the wall with his blood.

When that happens, Nico starts to panic, grabbing the lone wire, putting the weights off to the side (I don’t know how they got there), and looking at Ace’s body just as Teruko and Eden enter the gym.

That’s more or less it. There’s obviously a few problems with this, and it’s probably significantly more complicated than the real answer, but it’s solid enough that some of it might be right. I just want to explain the blood on the wires, man.

One question is why the left fan isn’t spinning. This depends on how turpentine works in DRDT. If it emits fumes that you have to inhale for a while before passing out, Nico turning off the left fan (be it with an off switch or by breaking it with the broom) could be a way for them to make sure the fumes don’t dissipate. When Ace enters the gym, the turpentine could be open and hidden, in a way that after a while, Ace inhales all the fumes necessary.

However, it’s also possible turpentine works more like how chloroform is usually depicted. In that case, it’s possible Nico used their cloak as a rag to apply the turpentine, then took it out of the gym to avoid inhaling any fumes themselves.

Because i’m case you haven’t noticed, Nico’s cloak is sorta like Arei’s glove, in that I have no idea where they went, and thus can’t really imagine how they fit into everything.

What is with DRDT characters and mysteriously losing their clothes during murders?

It’s also physically dubious; not enough that I really think it’s 100% impossible, but still. And I have no idea what happened to the weight rack beyond “there might have been a struggle” (which only kinda works, those things are heavy), or why Nico put the weights there…

And I don’t know why Nico did any of this. My pal, please, just fucking stab him next time.

Is this right? Probably not, but I think the general idea is plausible. We’ll find out in a few days just how wrong I was about this, anyways.

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Alright, so for the big question.

Whodunnit?

There are a few important things to consider when it comes to a culprit theory. I’ll outline them here so you can judge your own picks for culprit based on my criteria, though obviously it might be different from yours. Personally, I believe any genuine theory on the culprit must account for the following things:

-Time of Body Manipulation: Because of the swinging and the marks on the wrists, which should fade quickly, Arei’s body must have been hung shortly before it was discovered. Since she’s assumed to have died at around 7:30 AM (yes, there are theories to the contrary, but I can’t address every single possibility here, so I’m just going to take the 7:30 AM time of murder as accurate since it’s what I believe), it’s assumed that’s the time the body was hung. The culprit should probably be someone without an alibi at the time, potentially clearing David, Veronika, J, Hu and Nico.

Potential Workarounds:

+Fake Alibi: Applicable mainly to Hu and Nico. But would either of them be willing to die for the other? Also, Nico agreed with Teruko that David was acting suspicious at the end of EP11. If they’re the culprit, casting doubt on David is a bad move. If they’re an accomplice and want the culprit to win, it’s a bad move. If they’re an accomplice and don’t want the culprit to win, they’d just say who the culprit is. There’s probably other examples like this, but that’s just off the top of my head.

I really don’t think Hu or Nico did this, in case you can’t tell :v

+Third Party: A third party could have hung the body after the murder. But given this third party can’t be David or Veronika (again assuming 7:30 AM as the time of death), and I genuinely don’t know who else would do this, I don’t find this likely.

-Time of Fish Disappearance: Nico claimed none of the fish were missing the last time they fed them, after having dinner the afternoon before the murder. At face value, and assuming Nico ate around the same time Hu and Eden did, the fish would have disappeared between 7 and 10 PM, as the relax room was closed between 10PM and 8AM. And judging from how Teruko talked about the situation at the start of the trial, it seems unlikely that the fish were taken after 8AM. This would mean Eden, Hu, Charles and Whit cannot have taken the fish without some workaround. J, Veronika, Teruko and Arturo have alibis starting at least at 7:30 PM, so maybe they could have taken them, maybe not.

Possible Workarounds:

+Early Nico Dinner: We don’t know when Nico ate dinner, and according to a quick Google search, Americans are fucking insane and, on average, eat dinner around 6:00~6:30 PM.

Genuinely what. I eat dinner at 9:00 PM usually and that’s on the low end of the spectrum for my country. When I’m with family, I eat at like 10:00~10:30 PM. Are you US dwellers good? Deeply unserious country, I tell you.

With that aside, you get the idea. If Nico ate dinner at that time, practically every alibi given goes out the window, except Charles and Whit I believe. This would mean Nico didn’t eat with Hu and Eden, but neither mentioned them in the original alibis, so take that as you will.

+Fake Alibis/Nico!Accomplice: A lot of these alibis are just two people. It’s not outright impossible Charles and Whit, Hu and Eden, or Arturo and J are working together for a fake alibi. Well, maybe not the last one :v Alternatively, getting Nico to lie about the amount of fish they fed would work; the fish could have gone missing before Nico claims they did. I don’t find this particularly plausible, but it’s an option.

+Third Party/Arei: Someone other than the killer brought the fish to the playground, be it Arei or a third party. Arei could be plausible if the note is fake in some way, as the killer could have invited Arei in person and asked for the fish that way, but I find that somewhat unlikely because why give the time if the letter’s fake?

+Fake Fish: The fish in the playground (or maybe the pond, but likely the playground) are fake, either artificial or maybe taken from the kitchen… if that even has minnows as food. Don’t know how this one would work frankly.

+Early Catch: The killer planned to use the fish to hide time of death since the moment they heard the relax room would be closed during nighttime, and put the fish in the jugs before Nico got a chance to count them. If Nico didn’t count them as soon as they saw them in EP2, but rather later, when they first fed them, this gives plenty of time for anyone to pull this off. The killer doesn’t need to have everything planned from the start, just the fish trick.

I wonder if the amount of workarounds I found for this reveals some kind of bias… Who knows.

-BDA Rule: Rule 10; “The BDA will play when three or more people who did not witness the murder discover the body.” This could potentially clear Teruko, Whit and Eden.

Possible Workarounds:

+Third (Fourth?) Party: Someone who did not witness the murder, other than the BDA trio, saw the body before Teruko opened the door to the playground. At this point in the trial, and with David and Veronika having alibis for the time between the murder and the discovery, I doubt this is the case. Do you see why I originally landed on accomplice theory btw, it literally offers a workaround for every potential problem.

+”See No Evil”: If the killer turned their backs after letting go of the spinny thing, and didn’t see the moment Arei’s neck snapped, they may not be considered a “witness.” This could have been intentional, with the killer taking advantage of Teruko’s idea to search in a group of three (and her bad luck of picking just the wrong person) to try and clear themselves; or unintentionally. The killer may have decided to look away just because they didn’t want to see the death. This is especially plausible if the killer felt genuinely bad about what they were doing, which is the most common interpretation of Eden!Culprit.

-Handwriting: The handwriting on the letter doesn’t match Charles’ (custom weapon list), Teruko’s (abomination she calls a list of revealed secrets), Whit’s (he dots the ‘i’s with hearts), or Eden’s (sample in the trial).

Possible Workarounds:

+Fake Handwriting: The handwriting on the note could be fake; Whit wouldn’t dot the ‘i’s with hearts, Charles would write differently. And notably, the sample Eden gives in the trial is in print, while the handwriting in the note is in cursive, so it wouldn’t take any effort for her to fake it.

-Purpose of the method: If the killer really emulated Nico’s method to frame them, they have to know what that method was in the first place. Maybe not figure it out 100%, but they at least need to see the gym to get a basic impression of what the method may have looked like. This would implicate Ace, Teruko, Eden, and possibly the Ace attacker if they’re not Nico. Nico themselves might have also repeated method… Because. Alternatively, the method could have been used for the “See No Evil” BDA workaround, possibly implicating Whit or Eden again.

Possible Workarounds:

+Doesn’t Matter: There is no purpose to the method. The killer chose a pulley system because. I doubt anyone genuinely likes this possibility :v

+Something I haven’t Thought About: What it says in the tin.

-The gym tape: The gym’s tape was still on the floor when Nico left the night of Ace’s attack. At this point, only Teruko, Eden and Ace were on the room. MonoTV then locks down the gym, meaning no one can come in. We see MonoTV open the gym the next morning, and Rose and Teruko are the first to enter. The tape was gone. That, combined with the tape’s sprite disappearing from the background around the time Ace gets up, would heavily imply the tape was taken by either Ace, Teruko or Eden. Since the tape later appears to have been used in the murder, this heavily implicates them.

Possible Workarounds:

+Eden the Unwitting Accomplice: The killer asked Eden to get the tape for them. However, this would mean that Eden would immediately know who the killer is the moment the tape gets identified. It doesn’t work to frame Eden, either, because at that point it’s her word (“[killer] asked me to get it for them!”) vs yours (“nuh uh”). And I don’t care who you are, people will trust Eden’s words over yours. It’s much safer to just get the tape yourself, and everyone has access to the gym. This is a pretty outlandish idea, in my opinion, unless you can come up with some other reason the killer would give Eden (or Ace) for picking up the tape.

+Eden or Ace took it for no reason and returned it later: No evidence of this.

+MonoTV Put it in Storage: Doesn’t explain the sprite disappearance, but even if you ignore that, there is no indication it did that.

+Rose Took it With Sleight of Hand: Why would she mention it to Teruko then. Just grab it, pocket it and shut up. I don’t think this works.

+It’s Not the Gym’s Tape on the Spinny Thing: Then, narratively, why would Rose bring attention to it when she goes to the gym with Teruko?

Alright, I believe that’s all the major things.

Probability Ranking

Zero Chance:

-MonoTV, Arei: There are rules against this.

-Xander, Min: Xander’s dead, Min’s in Mexico (/j).

-Teruko: Protag privilege. Also her handwriting sucks too much for her to fake the note.

-Charles: His necrophobia would prevent him from manipulating the body after killing Arei, which is necessary to string her up on the swing set.

First Assumption: The Murder Happened at 7:30 AM the Day of Body Discovery

Although this isn’t technically 100% confirmed yet, I personally find it really hard to believe that the time of death is different from this. This eliminates:

-David, Veronika, J: Alibis. They have no reason to cover for each other, so they’re out.

-Hu, Nico: I believe Hu is currently the most popular pick for blackened, and I cannot for the life of me figure out why. Yes, she could be lying about the alibi, but if Nico calls her out, it’s curtains. Is Nico really willing to die for Hu? Is Hu willing to kill everyone, including Nico, to escape? Conversely, if Nico’s the blackened, is Hu aware of what she’s doing by faking an alibi? I doubt it given EP12, so she’d be lying because she has faith in Nico. But, at present, I have no reason to believe that. “It’s plausible” isn’t evidence. Sorry, but I cannot for the life of me see Hu or even Nico as culprits anymore.

Second Assumption: MonoTV Didn’t Take the Tape from the Gym

Though technically an assumption, since there is zero evidence it did this, I’ll say it’s an assumption regardless. It leads to:

Third Assumption: The Killer Took The Tape

As stated, if it wasn’t MonoTV, it kinda has to be either Ace or Eden. If the killer didn’t take the tape, that means either they asked Ace/Eden for the tape beforehand (insane, it’s much safer to take the tape yourself) or Eden/Ace took the tape for some undisclosed reason, then someone else asked them for it. But since we don’t know what Eden or Ace would want the tape for other than murder, this also seems unlikely. Thus, assumption number three is assumed, and eliminates…

-Levi, Rose, Arturo, Whit, and all the prior characters (minus Teruko ig). Yes, I believe the tape works as a smoking gun in the same way that the building map worked as a smoking gun against Min.

Notably, all the new characters here also fail to explain why the method was unnecessarily complicated, since none of them know about the Ace murder method. The exception is Whit, where the purpose could be the “See No Evil” technicality, but that comes with a lot of assumptions itself, and there’s other problems with Whit!Culprit (namely, fish).

And Then There Were Two

Ace and Eden are, in my opinion, far and above the likeliest candidates for blackened in this case. Both of them have their issues as theories, but both have things going for them. Let’s compare and contrast!

Point for Eden: Starch on Clothes

One point that’s Eden specific is an idea originated from thebadjoe’s mind. Since starch can be used as fertilizer, it’s possible the starch holding the ball of clothes together came from the enriched formula used in the relax room. If this is the case, the clothes must have been left there in either the first or second night of the second chapter, as putting them there during the third night would make them inaccessible before the murder. And Eden was seen acting suspicious in the dressing room, where clothes are, on the second night.

Eden: W-Who’s there? I know you’ve been following me!

[…]

Eden: Oh, it’s just you, Teruko. What are you doing here?

Like, why’s she so paranoid?

This isn’t disqualifying for Ace, however, as he could have done this the very first night. Alternatively, it’s possible Teruko misidentified the starch. There’s just no evidence for it, as opposed to Eden doing the thing, where there is evidence for it.

Workaround Needed (Eden): “See No Evil”

Eden is part of the BDA crew, meaning there needs to be a workaround for Rule 10. If Levi’s not there to accomplice it up, then “See No Evil” is the only acceptable workaround in my eyes.

Now, I fully believe that, no matter what, Eden probably would turn her back the moment Arei’s neck snapped. She didn’t want to look at Xander’s eye wound, so it’s plausible she would just not want to look when Arei actually died. Which means we just need the “See No Evil” technicality to work from a rules standpoint.

And while it may be a sticking point for some people, I personally think that a combination of MonoTV’s incompetence and Teruko’s bad luck could cause this technicality to exist. Especially given:

Eden [Right before the BDA]: Teruko, wait—

This reaction is best justified by Eden!Culprit imo. If Eden’s the culprit, I don’t think she realized the “See No Evil” technicality. She couldn’t refuse to search with Teruko, obviously, that would make her too suspicious, but she still didn’t want Teruko to open the door because she thought the BDA wouldn’t play, as she would think she’d be counted as a witness. But who knows.

Point Against Eden: Eden’s Strength

By far the biggest sticking point against Eden!Solo under my murder method. She is canonically the weakest in the cast, and yet, she still needs to pull off four important feats of strength; throwing the ball of clothes, subduing Arei, pulleying her up, and hanging her body afterwards.

The thing is, even though Eden is “the weakest,” we… don’t have a good reference of how strong or weak she actually is. Eden’s still an adult woman, she doesn’t have to be hopelessly weak. So, how much do we have to suspend our disbelief on her strength?

Well, pulleys are powerful, and even though we are not dealing with an ideal pulley by any means, I think it’s reasonable Eden would be able to pulley Arei up. Obviously impossible to prove one way or the other, though. I also believe there’s a good argument that she’d be able to subdue Arei because, well…

Apparently, Eden’s a better fighter than any of us could have expected. If she’s able to rip out Xander’s eye with a fork, I think she’d be able to strangle Arei unconscious. Especially given there’s precedent for her making people fall to the ground by taking them by surprise.

(This is a silly point, but it exists)

The big ones are actually the ball of clothes and the hanging of Arei’s corpse on the swing set. Keep in mind she doesn’t just need to throw the ball of clothes (or something like it) over the rafters, but also do it with enough force to displace the lights. That’s kinda difficult. As for the hanging… well, that’s one of the reasons I started believing Levi!Accomplice in the first place, and why I put the broom where I did in the Ace method. It’s pretty difficult to tie a knot on the swing set with Arei as dead weight.

An accomplice does solve this, but with the recent insight we’ve gotten on Levi, I struggle to see anyone actually accomplice-ing it up, frankly.

Ace is stronger than Eden; in fact, he’s one of the stronger in the cast. He would have no issues doing all this, theoretically.

Well, physically, he’d have no issues. Intellectually…

Workaround Needed (Ace): Reason for Murder Method

But, hold on. I said that Ace, if he’s the killer, is probably using the mechanism to frame Nico, right?

Here’s the thing; that would imply he knows what Nico’s mechanism was. Or at least, has a vague idea. However, he was unconscious the entire time he was being attacked.

This would mean that after just waking up and with severe injuries, he managed to get a good enough look at the crime scene that he managed to figure out more or less what Nico did to him. And either he did that instantly, or he grabbed the tape for who knows what reason and later thought back and realized what happened to him.

Look, if Eden’s strength is a point against her, we also have to consider Ace’s intelligence. He is not figuring out what happened to him, and I struggle to think he’d even conceive of the idea of replicating Nico’s method to frame them.

That means he needs a different reason for doing the murder with the pulley method, and I can’t think of any. Not saying it doesn’t exist, just that it really does need a workaround that I am not able to find.

Workaround Needed (Eden): Fish Heist

As stated above, Eden desperately needs some way around the fact she has an alibi for the time the fish presumably disappeared. Here are the possible workarounds, and why they’re iffy.

+Early Nico Dinner: Unsatisfying to me, as I think it makes more sense for Nico to eat dinner with Hu and Eden, but one of the more plausible options. There’s a really tight time frame for Eden to grab the fish if Nico ate earlier, but it’s doable. It’s unfortunate we have no frame of reference for when Nico actually fed the fish.

If it helps, the fact that Eden and Hu’s alibi has such a specific start time (their dinner, 7:00 PM) could be because it’s going to be relevant, suggesting this might be the real answer.

+Fake Fish: No established way for Eden to pull this off. It’s possible, but there’s no evidence for it.

+Early Catch: One of the better answers, though it runs into a bit of an issue. It would mean Eden was planning around a murder the entire chapter. She doesn’t necessarily need to have the whole method in mind, just the trick with the fish, but she’s still gotta have been planning something. The problem is, in CH 2 EP 1, she says this:

Eden: If everyone else is feeling down in the dumps, then it’s my job to get their spirits back up! That’s how we’ll get out of here! By working together!

This is said to no one, she’s talking to herself. Which is very strange if she’s going to be grabbing fish for a potential murder just a few hours later.

There’s a few workarounds for this workaround’s issue, though:

*Eden could have grabbed the fish for non-murdery purposes. No idea what they’d be though, so that’s not great.

*She hadn’t decided to murder yet, but had it as a backup plan if she couldn’t find any other way to get out in the meantime. Uh… maybe? I struggle to see it, but it could work. She does talk about plans to escape a lot.

*The secrets spurred her into murdery action. Now, I really doubt Eden would kill to hide she’s a lesbian (not to dismiss the fact that everyone should be allowed to come out only when they’re ready, David), but there’s a detail learnt in chapter 13 that makes this workaround workaround more plausible: Veronika’s secret is not the worst thing she’s done. As a result, it’s not impossible that Eden has a worse secret than what Charles received, and MonoTV just didn’t pick it for some reason. This feels like a copout, frankly, but it’s technically plausible even if I don’t see any real evidence for it.

As you can see, the workarounds are far from perfect. However, it’s not just Eden who struggles with the fish.

Point Against Ace: Fish Paradox

It’s generally assumed the killer used the fish to make the cast believe the murder happened before nighttime, possibly between 7:30 PM and 10:00 PM specifically if they were banking on people finding the note. The problem is that Ace doesn’t benefit from this, as he has no alibi at that time. Getting the fish water is objectively harder than just getting water from the kitchen sink at nighttime or something, so why would he do it?

This is what we DRDT theorists* call the fish paradox. Any character who benefits from people thinking the murder happened before nighttime, only benefit because they have an alibi around 7:30-10PM. But assuming Nico fed the fish around 7:00 PM, that means they couldn’t have taken the fish. But if they could have taken the fish, that’s only because they don’t have an alibi around that time, which means they don’t benefit from taking the fish.

*Only I call it this. Don’t fall for my lies, there is no “we” :v

Ace falls into the second category: could have taken the fish in the time it’s assumed they were taken, but he doesn’t benefit from it. As a result, you need to give an alternate explanation for why the fish are there, and I can’t find one.

This paradox is what makes many, like me, believe there is some kind of trick around when the fish disappeared, be it an accomplice or some other workaround. Which lines up with Eden, but not Ace.

Workaround Needed (Eden): Handwriting

Straightforward, already explained it. She wrote in print during the trial, meaning the sample is unfit for comparison with the letter, written in cursive. I don’t think this is a problem.

You wanna know a bigger problem?

Point Against Ace: Teruko’s Live Reaction

This entire debate, the entire reason these two are the most likely culprits in my mind, is because they’re the only two who could have reasonably taken the tape from the gym, and the only real purpose of doing so would be murder.

But there’s a glaring issue. Logistically speaking, I find it almost impossible to believe Ace took the tape. Why? Because ever since the moment Ace woke up, logically, Teruko’s attention should have been on him. And since she’s the PoV character in that scene, if Ace grabbed the tape, we should have heard of it. Since we didn’t, Ace most likely didn’t.

It’s this point, more than any other, that makes me believe Eden is the culprit. The only way to make Ace!Culprit work taking this into account is assuming Teruko pulled the same thing she did with Arei’s body swinging; she saw it and didn’t say anything. But that’s different, because we actually saw the swinging ourselves as well; if Ace picked up the tape, and Teruko saw it, we should have gotten clarification.

Argument Bullet Round!

+Eden’s Newfound Plot Relevance: Some have claimed that the fact Eden is seemingly the one to have taken out Xander’s eye means she must remain alive for that plot point to remain relevant. However, uh, there’s another person in the pre-prologue scene where Xander loses an eye.

And that’s Xander.

Who’s dead.

If plot relevance didn’t save him, I doubt it’ll save Eden. If anything, DRDT has a habit of killing off characters the moment the overarching plot catches up to them.

+Heels: Hu mentions walking with heels in the playground can scuff the floor, and Ace wears heels (I think). However, walking on heels wouldn’t generate the scuff marks we saw, so I believe it’s a moot point.

+Not A “Good Person”: In this chapter, which has the hidden title “A Good Person”, Levi, Eden, Teruko, David, and Xander have been called “a good person.” Given the hidden title, it’s speculated this list is about characters who in some way tie into the themes of the chapter, so the blackened should be included. Ace has not ever been referred to as a “good person,” and I can’t see him being called that this late into the trial. Not the strongest argument, but it’s there.

+Motive: Much has been written about Eden’s potential motivations, but at least we know she has always had an interest in escaping the killing game one way or another. Additionally, it’s very possible Eden didn’t believe Arei actually meant what she said during the Arturo situation, as she wasn’t present during the playground breakdown where her secret was revealed; and might be regretting her murder now that there’s evidence she genuinely wanted to change. If you want a more detailed explanation, I suggest you read venus’ fantastic Eden!Culprit Narrative Defense and the “can Eden still be the culprit?” section of accirax’s ep 13 reactions (which also summarizes the relevant parts of the first post), which explain this idea in more detail.

Meanwhile, Ace… probably wants to escape as much as anyone else, but he’s not ultra pressed about it. No particular grudge against Arei, either. I can’t think of a good motive for him, but maybe there will be one revealed later in the trial.

+Thematic Connection: Arei and Eden are recap foils, obviously they have plenty of narrative and thematic connections to make this murder narratively meaningful. Meanwhile, while Ace and Arei are similar in some aspects, I can’t really think of any themes which could be meaningfully explored with him as the killer. That might be the bias talking though lol.

And more but I think I’ve made my point.

So, despite everything, I still believe Eden is the culprit. Maybe our girl is stronger than we expected?

Conclusion

I still think Eden!Culprit is the most likely option we have, just that I now consider Eden!Solo more likely than Levi!Accomplice. That said, even with the things I brought up at the start, I’d say Levi!Accomplice is still more likely than Ace!Culprit, while Ace!Culprit is massively more likely than the third most likely culprit. Who is… I don’t know, Whit?

There’s been a few changes to accommodate the things discussed in the trial: Arei got splashed with water at some point, the rope was tied to a handlebar instead of there being a stopper, and the grippy tape was so the rope wouldn’t slide off.

Aside from that, there’s been a few modifications to my theory to accommodate Eden!Solo. Using the reveal of Eden ripping out Xander’s eye as a basis, I think Eden would realistically be able to strangle Arei unconscious by ambushing her, and potentially strong enough to pull off everything else she needs to, though I get how that may be a point of contention. Eden must have also faked her handwriting in the trial, looked away in the moment of death to cause the “See No Evil” technicality, and something’s fishy with the fish. Either she grabbed them day one, or Nico had an earlier dinner than expected; at this point, I think it’s impossible to tell.

The changes for the Ace-Nico thing were outlined in full earlier, all that’s left in that front is to see how wrong I am about it this Friday! :D

All in all, there haven’t been as many changes as I expected. In fact, the majority of this post is just me repeating stuff I already brought up in other posts, but applied to more people. Hope it doesn’t feel like I talked more than necessary.

Anyways, thanks for reading! If you made it this far, you deserve to treat yourself and buy a cute clock that you like! See ya’!

#drdt #danganronpa despair time #drdt theory #drdt spoilers #eden tobisa #ace markey #nico hakobyan #jesus this took longer than it should have

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strongheartneteyam · 1 year

Text

Realize where you belong.

Pairing: neteyam sully x female!dreamwalker!reader/female!human!reader

Chapter 5

CW: dubious consent, mentions of NON CON, neteyam yearning for reader, angst all over, you can see the sexual tension with your naked eyes, possessive neteyam, feelings of general and sexual confusion, mentions of sexual fluids, talks of being sexually aroused, sexual content, tsaheylu is mentioned, reader is still scared of Neteyam but she longs for him too, fear kink (if you squint), mentions of blood, size kink (if you really squint), primal [hunter/prey] kink (if you squint HARD), crying, strong language, the word "harassment" is mentioned, MAY BE TRIGGERING to some people, mentions of exophilia, indecisive reader, heartbroken Neteyam, heartbroken reader. Please, tell me if I missed anything important!

I slept a lot during the day yesterday and was up until late with my bf having dinner, watching YouTube etc and, when he went to sleep, I was restless, still didn't feel like sleeping so, I decided to edit and finish this chapter that was being kept in my Docs for way too long, it was getting dusty 😂 So, I might have stayed up until morning in the zone editing and finishing this 👀 I'm REALLY sleepy and exhausted rn, so, if some parts of this chapter don't really make sense, try to have empathy for my poor tired being and forgive me <3 I'm aware that I'm a hot mess who has insomnia and needs to get a grip and not put her art above healthy sleeping habits but what can I do? I'm one of those chaotic artists who have a hectic, unstable life and feel the most alive when they're immersed in their craft, running away from their problems, pouring their whole soul into their works 🤷🏻‍♀️

Not proofread. Me. too. tired. 💤 I'll do it ASAP! hope you guys like this. 🤍😘 comments will ALWAYS be incredibly appreciated.

Chapter 4

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

From lashes to ashes and from lust to dust

In your sweetest torment I am lost

And we sense the danger but don't want to give up

It's heartache every moment, from the start 'til the end

It's heartache every moment with you

Heartache Every Moment (HIM)

ˏˋ°•*⁀➷

You stared at Neteyam, at his big face, covered with stripes and fascinating bioluminescent freckles, leaving unique patterns all over his blue skin.

Even though he was kneeling down, doing everything he could to seem smaller and not so scary, to make you feel less intimidated by his size, his face was still way above your eyes, you still felt your neck hurt a little when you had to look up - straining your muscles, already sore from working too much - to gaze at his eyes.

"Oh, paskalin" (honey) "I could make you feel so good, you don't even know..." he was now even closer to you - you didn't even think it was possible but there he was, his massive frame making you feel smaller than ever. Fear of him snapping at you, in case you did something that didn't please, and hurting you was taking over your mind. You didn't know that Omatikaya boy, how could you trust him? "Give me a chance, be my mate and lemme show you how much pleasure I can give you, how I can make you feel safe and fulfilled in my arms after we make love. Like no fucking human male could ever do. Not like I would." Neteyam's fangs got prominent at that moment, and you could tell he was restraining himself from hissing at the thought of a human man having you in his arms. God, that had a name...

"Obsession." you thought

Despite those horrible feelings you were experiencing, his foreign accent still sounded weird but strangely fascinating to your ears, simultaneously. You hated yourself for feeling drawn to Neteyam, even though he was clearly stepping over your limits. You didn't know if maybe it was a na'vi courtship behavior for the male to get this close to the female, even if she hadn't shown any signs of wanting him to. But Neteyam wasn't exactly courting you, you thought. It was more like... straight up harassment, at least in human culture.

Your breath became heavier inside your oxygen mask when you thought about him using his fangs to draw blood from your skin in case you were able to be fast enough to go past where he was kneeling down next to you, and, tried to run away. With his incredibly slender, toned legs he could easily catch up with you in a millisecond and grab you, being free to do whatever he wanted to your small, defenseless human body. That thought made you feel like someone was knotting your intestines tight.

"Eywa... You're just so fucking pretty, even in this demon form, that I... I wanna do to you, right now, all I've been dreaming about, since I first saw you and you made my blood run hotter through my veins, such a fire you ignited inside me, syulang..." (flower)

Neteyam's breath was so heavy once out of his nostrils, clouding your mask, like he's controlling his urges, trying to hold back from touching you. You felt your knees weaken, fear and tension being the reasons why.

"Y-you don't want me, Neteyam. Not really. You just think you do. You're only intrigued by me because I look different from the girls you're used to. The na'vi girls." You didn't know how but you dug deep inside your chest and found the courage there to say that, looking into the alien's eyes.

Neteyam chuckled faintly, air coming out of his nose, in disbelief

"How can you say such thing, hì’i?"

"Hì..hì?" You tried to pronounce what you had just heard, in vain. You had no idea what that na'vi word meant. It's not like you knew that much of the na'vi language, anyway. You only knew the basic stuff that you had to study and learn to be able pass one of the tests that would determine if you were ready to get an Avatar body from the lab

"Hì'i." He corrected you, smiling wide and laughing quite a bit. "You're so silly and cute. Hì'i means "small in size" in my people's language. You are small, in this current physical form. But, let's talk about what's most important: what makes you think I don't really want you?"

"Because I am a demon to you, as you said. I am a human girl, not a na'vi girl." you said, rage slipping through your eyes. Why the hell was that crazy na'vi guy calling you a "demon", saying that he wants you sexually and calling you pet names, all at once?

"But you have an Avatar body. Nothing is preventing you from having your consciousness transferred for good to that body. If my father did it, so can you." The alien said, full of confidence. You wondered if he was going insane.

"And what makes you think I wanna do it?"

“My tawtute," (human) "I can smell you. I know you want me too. You're wet for me. Don't forget my senses are way sharper than what you're used to" Neteyam smiles calmly while enjoying the way your scent hit his nostrils. You felt your face flood with color, so much blood going directly to that part of your body as you felt incredibly embarassed when you heard those words. You had just realized your panties were soaked. "And, I'm sorry, but I have to tell you… Your juices smell so fucking delicious. You're driving me insane right now, yawne. I think that, at the end of the day, becoming my mate and making tsaheylu with me wouldn't be such a horrible experience for you."

Your thoughts cursed at you like crazy: "Damn it!! I must be kidding my own self!! Having a slight crush on him is one thing, getting fucking wet for him is something totally different! Do I have a fear kink, a rape kink or am I just into freaking exophilia?! For real, girl... There's gotta be something extremely wrong with you for you to be this turned on by the thought of this alien guy taking you by force."

"You're crazy! I'm not gonna be your mate! Just fucking let me go!" You wondered if you had just lost your mind to say and do that to Neteyam, being currently in your human body (if you were Dreamwalking it would obviously be safer) but you couldn't take all that was happening at that moment anymore. Your heart was beating too fast, like you were about to have a cardiac arrest. It was too much. You were overwhelmed.

You caught Neteyam off guard, the words you shouted stinged him so hard it left his very heart wounded, the muscles throbbing in pain. You noticed he seemed hurt, the sides of his mouth curled down faintly and his cat like ears were pointing towards the ground.

You felt bad for hurting his feelings. Even though he was disrespecting you, there was still enough empathy inside you to make you feel bad for making him suffer. You did not enjoy hurting people.

You inhaled and exhaled, trying to calm your nerves and, finally, you said:

"Look, I don't mean to be rude, even though you honestly deserve it. There's no excuse for what you're doing. You can't force me to be your mate. I'm not even na'vi! And don't start with that "You have an Avatar body" thing, please!" You breathe in deeply and let the air out slowly "I'm not your dad and I don't intend to follow his steps. I know very well I could die if I tried to go past Eywa's eye. Even if I wanted to get my consciousness transferred forever to my Avatar form, it's too damn risky. Plus, what makes you think I'd ever do it for you? I barely know you." You sighed, exhausted from it all. "Let me go back to my room. Please…?"

Neteyam looked tired and he was starting to feel defeated, like a soldier fighting in the front lines of a war who was losing his stamina after shooting way too many enemies in a very short period of time.

"I just wish you could…" it's like the words felt too rough against his throat, like it was too hard to talk at that moment "... could see that I won't hurt you." He sighed again "I know it feels weird and I'm big and scary, like you say…" His heart hurt at the reminder of your tough words "But I promise you - and I take promises very seriously. My parents taught me to do so, ever since I was old enough to understand their words - I would never lay a finger you." The expression on his face looked utterly serious, like he truly meant it. "Ever."

"You're hurting me with your actions, your words... the way you talk about me, about my body. I don't know about your culture, but it's pretty disrespectful in mine. I feel violated. I do think most of what the human race considers right or wrong is just bullshit, dumb society rules made up by even dumber people. But I have to agree with them on this one." You said

"I'm sorry... I'm so sorry, hì’i tawtute." (small human) Neteyam looked down at the floor and there was shame all over his face

"Opening my window for you was a mistake."

Neteyam looked at you with eyes filled with sadness

He got back on his feet and stepped away from you, staying now arguably a good amount of steps away from where you were standing.

"Please, don't say that…" Neteyam pleaded with tears in his eyes

"I'm sorry. I have to go."

༊⁀➷

Once you got back to your room, took your oxygen mask out of your face on autopilot and closed the window, you stared for a while at Neteyam's oddly tall figure, still standing in front of your room.

You looked at him and your heart broke. He looked so hurt. His big yellow irises shone insanely in the dark of the eclipse. But his eyes were tainted with tears. His dark braids fell onto his shoulders perfectly. He was incredibly beautiful. But why could you only let your guard down when he was away from you? When you were behind a glass and he was standing on the other side? It broke your heart to do that. But you also knew he was being too much. Too eager. Stepping over your limits and making you uncomfortable. But what if that was just his na'vi nature? You had heard before that the na'vi were humanoid but still animalistic. Maybe it was just… his primal instincts to find a mate. You wondered if maybe you were being too harsh on him. But you still felt like you could not and should not trust him. Even though you wanted to.

You watched him walk away, his shoulders pointing downwards, his posture showing he knew he had lost that battle.

You wondered if he would come back or if he would give up on you. You felt so idiotic. Why did you want him to come back? He was not treating you the way he should be, with respect for your boundaries.

You felt so confused. There was a lump in your throat. You felt like you were about to cry too.

Your hands were cold and you were feeling anxious and your chest was filled with angst. You wanted to scream Neteyam's name and ask him to come back. But you did not. You knew you shouldn't. It could awake someone. It could be dangerous. You should not trust Neteyam, you kept repeating in your mind.

Your feet started to move, almost as if they did it on their own, because it felt like your mind was somewhere else, like your brain was occupied with something else other than sending a message to your feet and tell them to take you back to your bed. You were lost in your thoughts. Dazed as hell.

Once you laid on your bed and covered your body with the warm sheets, you felt a sinking feeling of sadness and guilt bruising your chest. Hot, painful tears streamed down your face and the lump in your throat intensified. Why were you crying? And why were you thinking about Neteyam Suli while you cried?

You wondered if he could imagine that you were now crying, just like he was when he left.

༊⁀➷

Taglist:

@kitsunefirewail @tumblingdevils @a-blog-name-2003 @xylobee @nerdybouquetofkittens-blog @henhouse-horrors @lala-1516 @xylianasblog @samistars @crazy4books1 @explosiongamora @lik0 @your-girl-mj @darktyrantwinner @sereisstuff @yeosxxx @die4niyahhh @iman-lu @manumanulau @im-in-a-pansexual-panik @hana-yuri @thehoneymushroomhealer @melllinaa @annaibansworld @siriuslysmoking @avatar4eva @ellabellabus07 @badbishsblog @neteyamsmate4life

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sleeplesssmoll · 9 months

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Finding the moment Schneider and Vertin's dynamic shifted.

This scene inspired me because we see Schneider's anger emerge, albeit subtly.

It almost seemed like Schneider was planning on letting Vertin live once again, like in the beginning when they first met. She was going to give Vertin a chop on the neck during their duel to knock her out.

But then Vertin repeats the lie that Forget-Me-Not Me Not told her. After hearing Vertin promise her a shelter, she turns her gun on her instead. Why would she trust the words of someone from the Foundation who rejected her and her family?

Hearing this proposal must have hit a nerve. It's important to note that at this point in time she only likes Vertin's looks and she respects her fighting skill. She has absolutely no reason to trust Vertin's words and every reason to resent the Foundation's dog. It's easy to forget since she's such a flirt in the main story but there is a lot of anger in her. She is a Mafia Boss. She provides for her 11 sisters and her parents in a world that constantly takes from her without giving a shred of mercy. If you’re curious about this, the link below has Schneider's snippets from the atlas, but for my purposes I'll only use a small section.

The Opportunist and the Sticky Gum

“Her figure might be frail, but her eyes are filled with cold anger. Maybe she had been rejected just now or even insulted. She walked up to the square center with a firm step, like a warrior.”

This is Schneider as she watched Sonetto take the mission capsule she tampered with back to Vertin. In the Walden, we see this warrior fighting for her family and Vertin is now an obstacle.

Also, she seemed genuinely annoyed at the lack of concern Vertin had for the wounds she inflicted. Her voice starts off in that same playful, flirty tone when she says “that's really annoying” and then she sounds genuinely pissed when she talks about shooting Vertin in the thigh (I'd place a clip here but there's a limit. Would recommend going back and listening to get the full picture). She is getting frustrated.

However, things change when Vertin and the others help her sister. I think the true turning point in their relationship is when Vertin pushed Sonetto out of the hole to escape Druvis and Schneider did the same for Marian.

Earlier when Schneider was talking to Forget-Me-Not, she mentioned the importance of family and brotherhood. We also know she loves her family dearly which is why she's in this mess.

Schneider and Vertin sacrifice themselves for the people they love. She's finally met someone who gives a damn about loyalty and they are on the same side as her.

While they're fighting together, Schneider is heavily injured and Vertin covers for her. If Vertin, the one with the gunshot wounds, is in better shape than Schneider then it's a very rough situation. Nonetheless, she respects Vertin's fruitless attempts of resistance and considers her brave. She tells Vertin to shoot her in the chest when the time comes. Here, she is putting her faith in Vertin because she has no other choice. This is her only chance.

Later on in Popular Literature Vertin brings Schneider a healing potion and food she stole because she assumes Schneider must be hungry. You know what she brought?

Cake!

If we ignore the horrors of hindsight where Schneider is a human so the cake must not have looked like cake due to Storm Syndrome, it's a very sweet gesture. The healing potion tastes awful, so maybe she chose the cake over other foods as a way to make it easier to deal with. This is the climax where Vertin follows through on her promise and proves she is someone Schneider can trust. The cake also shows Vertin's empathy, something we see Schneider doesn't receive often. She's trying to make her as comfortable as possible instead of treating her as a pawn in her greater plan. They're working as a team, not as lord and subject.

#reverse 1999 #vertin #schneider #character analysis #i want to see a cutscene of their fight!

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thewayuarent · 1 year

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Handling an addiction. Part 2.

About actual changes.

tw: mentioning of drug abuse, suicide attempt, sexual assault

In part one we discussed how Ray’s main circle is actually more damaging for him than helpful. Thank you everyone for your responses, it means a lot. Today we’ll discuss the if not positive but more hopeful approach towards Ray’s addiction and why I do believe there are (always) chances for him to get better. I want to talk about the one person who potentially has enough influence to start this journey. But firstly I’ll talk about one person who can provide Ray support towards it.

Sand. The very first thing that differs Sand from Ray’s friends is timing. Remember this scene we haven’t got yet? I have no idea what’s that about but I do find this phrase very interesting.

Ray is absolutely wrong to blame Sand for whatever is happening in his life - the thing that addicts do often, by the way (and this is understandable and I am not blaming anyone thank you) - but he’s ironically right about one thing. Sand steps in his life when Ray is at his lowest. The worst since, probably, two years ago suicide attempt. Ray replaces the cause and the effect - it’s not because of Sand his life is going down to hell, it’s a coincidence that Sand appears at this time in his life.

But this is why it’s probably easier for Sand to recognise Ray as someone who desperately needs help. He wasn’t there while Ray was slowly going down. He appears when Ray is already here.

The thing is, it’s actually a bit too early to discuss how Sand handles Ray’s addiction. The whole drama will start when (or if, but my bet on when) they start a relationship. And of course Sand will make mistakes - we all do in any topic but especially this one. It’s a normal human thing. But Sand has very important qualities - he has empathy, compassion and he catches quickly on both verbalize and non-verbalize information.

The start of those two was pretty rough - Sand called Ray a spoiled rich brat - and this is, well, because Ray is a spoiled rich brat - a burden and he didn’t think highly of him. He continues this approach till this moment

But after Ray says this, Sand immediately understands that something deeply wrong and traumatic is happening here. And after that he stops with rude language, he shifts on harsh, but compassionate words. He still calls out Ray on his behaviour - in the music store scene and later in hospital. But his approach is very different from their earlier communications.

The same thing is with alcohol. Sand spends a noticeable part of the show unintentionally supporting Ray’s habits. He was hired as his drinking buddy, that was their start. He probably understood since the beginning this is a bit alarming, but it was not his place to deal with it. The big shift happening after this conversation

And while it doesn’t happen immediately - they have a party right after that - this is changing Sand’s approach once again.

So for now we have only one example of Sand handling the addiction problem Ray has - that’s why I said it’s not enough. But this example speaks volumes. He is, once again, compassionate and understanding. He doesn’t judge or blame Ray for his addiction, but he doesn’t forget his mistakes. He is very careful in his wording.

Here, very important moment: Sand doesn’t say “I ban you from alcohol forever” - because he understands it won’t work. He says “You need a rest and let’s try to hold on for a bit, just until you feel better”. He gives Ray an opportunity to not drink for some time without a very scary “forever”. Just for this one.

And this is very good thinking. Because while it works for everyone differently - some people prefer to quit once and forever, some people do it step by step - we’re talking here about a person who doesn’t want to quit yet. And temporarily limiting him is the best chance you have.

For now Sand is doing a very good job at building a support system someone with addiction needs. But this never - never - works out until Ray decides that he needs help. This never works out until Ray makes a decision to start working through it for himself.

Ray. The thing I desperately need for people to understand is: nothing will make a difference for him until he himself makes a decision that he wants to heal. Until he wants it not for Mew, or his dad, or Sand - for himself. We had a beautiful conversation about some of this with @twig-tea here - and one of the topics was about the difference between someone who knows about problem and want to heal and someone who ignores it. And for Ray this is not even about him understanding he has a problem - because I believe he does, at least on subconscious level.

He said this to Sand

and wording speaks volumes. He knows that addiction was (part of) a reason his mother died. He also said this to Mew

and this to his dad

so he is capable of drawing a parallel. He knows he’s doing the same thing she did. He understands that his substance abuse is dangerous, he has an experience with his mom ruining her life because of that.

But he is also trapped in a very harmful pattern. A pattern where it’s way easier for him and his surroundings to ignore a problem. Both Mew and Cheum tell him to stop on several occasions and his answer is always “Yeah. I know, whatever”. For now they do it just for check, he answers just for check also. Those conversations I believe happen a lot but they never have an actual meaning. And then when Sand calling him out on his addiction Ray does the same thing he does all the time.

He brushes it off like something not really important because he is used to it. And because it is way, way easier to do. Ray is not only an addict, he is also suicidal and while I can’t make diagnoses I think he is depressed and he is so on his self-destruction journey.

And those conversations running around about how Ray needs a wake-up call? He had a lot of them already.

As far as we know he was:

Waking up in some stranger’s place thinking he was sexually assaulted and robbed;

Attempting a suicide;

Risking his (and everyone else) life while drunk driving;

Charged for this drunk driving;

Almost arrested for drug possession and use.

And the truth is? He doesn’t care about this, because he doesn’t care about his life or wellbeing. He doesn’t need one big dramatic wake-up call. What he needs is careful and consistent conversations about his situation. What he needs is someone to tell him again and again and again that he deserves help. That he doesn’t need to be a perfect or even good person to deserve it. And maybe, maybe it will work. And only then the therapy and rehab and whatever tools exist will work.

And two more words about the rehab thing. This is something literally everyone wants for Ray as soon as possible. No matter how people approach his character this is the one thing everyone agrees on. And while I also think that rehab is something he needs, as much as therapy, I know it won't work for him right now.

Because to forcefully put someone in rehab is one of the worst things you can do. Rehab is not some magical place that automatically heals an addict. Rehab is a support tool - same as therapy, or AA, or whatever is right for a person (cause everybody is different and some things work for some people but don’t work for others). Again, until it’s something Ray wants and chooses for himself - rehab is almost 100% useless. The chances that Ray being put into rehab by some external forces - his dad - will relapse in the first month after getting out is very high. Rehab for him right now would be a fucking torture. And a pointless one.

Rehab, or therapy, or Sand’s or anyone’s support - all of this is very important and needed, but those things don’t exist in a vacuum. For them to have an impact Ray has to want it for himself. And this is such an incredibly hard thing to do. This requires a lot of self work and a lot of strength. I can’t express how much I hope for him to get to this point.

But I do understand that he's not there yet. And while I know how exhausting and frustrating it is - I want people to remember that for him it’s so much worse. He is the main victim of his disease. Have compassion. Have patience. Don’t forget that he is much more than his addiction. But don’t forget about it either.

#only friends meta #ofts #only friends the series #ofts meta #only friends #sandray #only friends ray

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laciere · 1 year

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Bo Ruberg: We Know The Devil is, as you say, about women who love other women, yet you've written online about being "against representation" in video games. What does that mean and how do you reconcile those approaches? Aevee Bee: That article was a little manifesto. When I say that I'm "against representation," I mean that representation can't just be a list of identity categories. It's not really representation unless you're creating complexity; without complexity, characters feel insincere and incomplete. The dumbed-down version of a queer person, or the queer person that never expresses their sexuality--these characters don't actually require you to empathize with queer people, because these characters have no sexuality. When you erase that, you erase their anchor, their passion, their frustrations, or their flaws even, especially their flaws. You're not doing empathy work if you're not engaging with these things, because these are the stumbling blocks for empathy. Sometimes people are like, "I like gay people who don't act gay." You know? Those are the people you're catering to when you make those sorts of characters. Identity is so important to talk about, yet it can be so limiting. I've been having a lot of discussions with queer activists and queer scholars about this desire to all call ourselves "queer," like we're this amorphous blob. That can actually be incredibly unhelpful because it doesn't acknowledge the very real differences that often exist between queer people. Our experiences are specific to our lives. Focusing only on identity, especially identity without experience, reduces everyone to an abstraction. Ruberg: Given how much you value the specifics of individual queer experience, how would you describe the complexities, as you call them, of your own queer identity? Bee: Being a woman is really important to me. Transness is also really important to me. In terms of sexuality, I tend to talk about how sexuality is practiced and understood rather than talking about specific attractions. What's the point of trying to say, "Oh, I have this very specific sexual identity" when sexuality is really hard to separate from gender identity and expression? Sexuality is more complicated than we often give it credit for. For example, I'm less interested in saying "I identify as bisexual," than I am in thinking about the ways that I love women and the ways that I love men and how those are unfortunately incredibly different because of all these social pressures, my own histories, and my internalized baggage. How do we navigate that together with another person? What does a relationship with someone like me look like? it's one thing to be like, "We have this list of labels," but we have so few models for what those labels are supposed to look like.

"Aevee Bee: On Designing for Queer Players and Remaking Autobiographical Truth", in The Queer Games Avant-Garde: How LGBTQ Game Makers are Reimagining The Medium of Video Games (2020, Duke University Press)

#the queer games avant garde #aevee bee #we know the devil #bo ruberg #reading log #video games #interviews

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vimook · 3 months

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i have many thoughts regarding rak and overall the lens on class in this episode, as well as its placement in the show.

the scene with prin was excellent, showcased exactly what rak's achilles heel is, and i personally appreciated that his dialogue went along with both morals, values, and ego. starting off with a very honest stance on how appalling her behavior was, as well as the instinct to defend mut, which i gather it stems a lot from how his mother was treated, following prin's observations. however, on the second half, when she touched the wound, it not only became about his mother. it became about him and his ego and his pain. he used mut to sell it too, which unfortunately overlaps any truth behind it. that's where his privilege became enhanced for me, so the jump to the tailor shop and him trying to make up to him by continuing to buy him made it even better, rather than just communicate and apologize. i liked that there's a clear deconstruction of rak's values and trauma responses, his hyper-individualism and self-isolation, also what he deems charitable and good but fails to see that a lot of what he does is through the lens of privilege, in spite of any understanding he gains from trauma, empathy and critical thinking.

i liked that mut is a key part in deconstructing that, and we honestly need more conversations like this, as well as mut further putting his foot down because as accepting and understanding one is, there has to be actual visceral feelings in place here. it ought to be a constant reminder and as i have said before, everyone has limits.

there has to be the other side of the same coin that showed us rak being apprehensive about knocking on that door, that showed us a rak becoming overcome with emotions after someone cooked him a meal. a rak that doesn't know how to take care of himself nor wants to. a rak that is constantly taken aback with intentionally being cared for, rather than just taken care of. we all know mut just loves, but loving without boundaries is not sustainable, so i guess that's what i mean by the other side of the same coin. because mut is also someone who has learned he has to prove himself somehow, no matter what he does and is told. he also thinks he has to save and take care of everyone, at his own expense.

that's why i find it interesting that in rak's mind, and vi's i gather, they think they do not treat them as commodities, but they do. i need that to be explored more and for it to not just be about awareness and "oh this exists". it needs to be inserted more, as their relationships and characters develop.

a very special applause to peat because he ate this episode!

#love sea the series #mahasamut #tongrak #rakmut #lu watches #fortpeat

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robo-boy · 19 days

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i kinda get what you're saying about being respectful for a brand new shooting but mostly not really. What's the difference between having fun with a shooting that occurred 10-20 years ago and one that occurred very recently? What's the "time limit" that needs to be crossed before it becomes "ok" to just treat it like we would treat anything else? And this is coming from a person who already struggles

a lot with feeling

empathy along with similar emotions, I came in the community with the expectation that people wouldn't be judged for doing or saying societally inappropriate things since the community itself is already very disrespectful and unsympathetic by societal standards so it feels very jarring to hear all this sudden backlash from tocers towards other tccers for just doing what toc is known for. Does that make sense?

i had a long ass reply to this but decided against ut

im trying to say theres never a time to stop being respectful and we should be treating cases even from the past with Human decency.

talk shit about the shooters or whatever but Dont act excited about it

being in a community Known for a lack of empathy shouldnt give you the excuse to be the same way. just because it Didnt affect you personally doesnt mean it didnt affect anyone

#yapping #sorry im really fucking tired

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themulitipurposechannel · 1 month

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Dynamics: Part 2, <Next!>

For Apocalypse F! Mikey: Now see Uncle Tello content is great and I love it. But consider this, it’s alr everywhere AND think bout Master Michelangelo /Uncle Mi supremacy ✨👀 think bout uncle Mi being the warm/comforting/ steadying presence that Cj clung to when Leo and April are stuck being the sole two pillars of leadership for the entirely of sentient life on earth and Donnie is off doing his mad scientist things(No hate to D but we know our boi has low empathy and tends to get hyper fixated to the point he ignores everyone. Not that he wouldn’t absolutely try for Junior cuz he would but ya know what I mean) which leaves the Mikey cuz our poor Raphie and Casey Sr died early.

Like Cmon guys hear me out Mike alr has Dr feelings and his ole mediator shtick. you can’t tell me that as he grew and matured it didn’t not grew stronger. Plus he defo Leaned into the whole mediator thing esp with the apocalypse cuz someone defo needed to be the calm mediator in the chaos that was the kraang. Plus he was ALR the most mentally/emotionally stable out of all the fam and a child in a chaotic environment (cough the apocalypse cough) is gonna unconsciously gravitate towards that. And mikey being mikey is then absolutely gonna white knuckle his “I’m emotionally healthy” even more cuz we got a kid now. We gotta make sure he grows up with SMTH.

Plus I like to think everyone had diff roles in raising Cj. Eg: Cj spends time with tello if he wants to hang out and blow shit up or wants to brainstorm tangible solutions. but if he needs/wants emotional support or emotional safety he goes to Mikey and if he wants all of the above plus advice in general it’s Leo and Comander April lmao (but 7/10 times it’s Leo). Side note: Before Raph died he and mikey used to tag team M’s role and April’s role was formerly Cassandra’s but welp we all know what happened 😭. Also I just wanna make it clear that these roles weren’t always hard and fast rule. It’s just generally the common status quo but was still subject to change depending on the circumstances cuz ppl are ppl and ppl are complex. Like if Cj was feeling particularly scared for Dee or April’s mortality I can guarantee he glomped them. And they let him.

Edit: In any case, their dynamic is basically all round calm, slow and cozy vibes. Cuz like I said, Mikey was acting as Cj’s living sentient equivalent of a warm, weighted blanket. Plus mystic overuse/cursed aging gave Mikey a lot of chronic fatigue and plus Mi leaning hard into the whole mediator thing rlly made him mellow out esp when he had to be responsible for a kid. So most of their hanging out was either sitting around talking about their day, making up stories bout random objects they found like ‘I bet that cup has a chip in cuz an alligator got it’ ,Cj ranting, mystic training, lots and lots of snuggles or (big shocker I know) Mikey reading to Cj (don’t Judge Cj, he finds Uncle’s Mi voice calming. And as tor Mikey, options are limited when you’re old, physically frail and in an apocalypse) or them reading tgt in comfy silence with the occasional comment of ‘man this character is so stupid’ and ‘I know right!’. Also In the earlier days when resources weren’t so scarce and Mikey had more energy they used to draw on the walls tgt using chalk but well.. stuff like that don’t last very long in the apocalypse.

For Past/present time: Once Cj starts to properly distinguish between future and present and feels a little more ready to start properly interacting with P!fam. He starts to build a stable relationship with Mikey. their dynamic is one of more equal standing cuz of the lack of age difference aka the big theme for this dynamic is all abt growing up tgt. This creates a more free and unrestrained dynamic where both feel more encouraged/safe to try new things cuz they don’t have to worry bout any hovering from any older siblings (sorry Leo he tries but even he can’t fully escape the big brother instincts even towards Case. Which is hilarious cuz Cj is the most self sufficient out of everyone XD ) and cuz they don’t have to worry bout looking stupid in front said older siblings if they fail/ being coddled if they fail. Initially it was a very big whiplash for Casey to adjust to the fact that someone he used to look for answers/ be a pillar was just as clueless as he was AND the fact he could freely argue back with said someone due to the lack of age difference.

But once both parties settled in, they have alot of fun just being kids and messing around. Honestly their dynamic is adorable. With Mikey’s more adventurous and more hopeful personality helping Cj start to relax a little more and start acting more like the 15 year old he is. And Cj’s more serious and sensible mindset helps Mikey become a little more thoughtful/cautious as he’s more open to Cj’s criticism cuz it feels alot less condescending than the rest of the fam due to the age similarity.

This dynamic also plays a part in Cj’s adjustment to the past. Due to said adventurous behaviour, Mike always wants to show Cj new things. And his emotionally intuitive nature helps him pick up when Cj is uncomfortable but doesn’t always feel comfortable saying it or can just generally quickly pick up the warning signs of a trigger. So after some trial and error Mikey gets pretty good at knowing when to push and pull Case out of his comfort zone or just out right cancel an outing cuz Dr feelings can sense the ensuing panic attack/ PTSD triggers. Which Casey rlly appreciates. On the flip side, Cj is the biggest advocate (second to Leo) for letting Mikey do his thing cuz he knows what Mikey is capable off and isn’t blinded with older sibling instincts. Which Mikey greatly appreciates. We stan mutually supportive siblings.

And as the youngest, they both bond (mostly Miguel talks, Cj listens oh how the tables turn) over how frustrating it is to see the rest of their family (for Cj it’s him using his experience with F!Fam to relate to P!Mikey cuz the P!Fam don’t rlly baby Casey the same way/the obvious extent they do for Miguel. For Mikey, it’s more they water down info either intentionally/unintentionally or try to stop him from doing stuff cuz they want to protect him. And for Cj, it’s more them trying to be extra subtly careful of his sore spots. Like Legit cuz of Cj, everyone at some point had independently googled ‘how to care for war-torn ptsd riddled relative’ and ‘how to help someone with material insecurity issues’ or ‘how to support someone going thru bereavement’. For once it wasn’t only Mike reading psych stuff lmao) trying to water things down for them like dums dums XD.

They also tag team the rest of their family with the combined powers of their puppy dog eyes and shared status as “baby’s of the family” to get out of trouble/get what they want like the gremlins they are 😂. Generally when hanging out they’re either doing things action driven stuff (a stark contrast to F!Mikey and Cj. Cuz P!Mikey is younger, less traumatised and hasn’t been peepawed) like graffiti (Mikey sprays full on masterpieces and Cj loves spraying colourful doodles cuz he’s delighted to play with all sorts of bright colours and see the pretty art Anglo makes that Cj didn’t have the luxuary of seeing in the apocalypse, so despite the huge skill gap, which is rapidly becoming smaller, they still have fun tgt), skateboarding, playing video games, parkour or Mikey kidnapping Cj to show/get him to try smth he didn’t get to do in the apocalypse, *cough the occasional arson cough* Like I said they’re awesome lmao

On a side note: both Cj and Mikey are very happy to have a cool brother/friend who is the same age as them. For Cj it’s cuz fellow kids were very rare back in his time. Meaning the kids that were round him were either much older or much younger so same age friends is very much a novel experience lmao. As for Mikey, although he does call Cj baby brother( he doesn’t actually enforce that unless in certain situations like Cj in distress or trying to get Cj to do Miguel’s part of chores lmao) most of the time he’s happy to not be alone in his age grp of family/friends cuz it can get a little lonely sometimes. Raph, April and Casey have each other, Donnie and Leo have each other and now Mikey and Cj have each other! Yaayyy

#art #digital art #procreate #save rottmnt #rottmnt #unpause rottmnt #hamato ninpo #healer cj #healer cj au #it’s baby brothers squared folks 😜#rottmnt casey jr #rottmnt mikey #they are so uncle and nephew ever it hurts 😭#bad future mikey #bad future rottmnt #rottmnt future mikey #michelangelo hamato #cassandra jones junior

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codename-mom · 6 months

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Is Hotch autistic?

Well, if you take into account the official material, the answer is: no. Or, at least, he’s never shown like that, and it’s never mentioned that he could be.

Now, if the question is: do I think Hotch is autistic? The answer is: yes.

Why do I think that?

First of all, I want to precise that my knowledges in that domain are limited, so there will be inconsistencies and imprecisions in the text below. I’m sorry if I hurt some of you doing so, it wasn’t the purpose of it (feel free to correct me, with manners please). And, on the other hand, it’s a very personal point of view. As so, this post is in no way canon.

TW: mention of child/domestic abuse, anxiety, CM violence

The first two aspects of his personality which might fit with the autistic Hotch hypothesis, and which are pretty obvious are:

His lack of expressiveness

Hotch is able to smile, we saw it in a few episodes, to laugh, to cry and even to be very angry (do I need to specify which episode I’m referring to?); so he feels emotions like anyone else, but his ability to express them is far below how JJ, Derek, Dave or Emily does. Most of the time, the character appears stoic, eyebrows furrowed, straight mouth, no matter what’s going on around or other protagonist reaction.

Yet, we know that he has empathy (he’s moved when Foyet killed seven innocents people in the bus, he’s about to fall in tears with that burnt woman (S02E19) and he cried when he accompany that man who has to watch his son’s death (S07E10)), we know that he’s careful about his men (he reassured Penelope after he was harsh with her, he took Spencer in his arms after they freed him from Tobias Hankel, he worried (a lot) about Emily when she was with Cyrus, etc.) and we know that he’s sensitive to what people say or don’t say to him (he returned Derek’s words about his defaults (S03E02) and he’s hurt when he realizes that JJ hide her pregnancy to him) BUT he doesn’t show it.

We can argue that he was trained for that purpose, but it’s supposed to apply when he is with witnesses, victims, or suspects; not when he’s with his men or his relatives. And he’s not especially expressive with Jack, for example.

(Look how happy he is! /o/)

He is, however, more with Haley and Beth, but not that much.

What are the reasons for this difficulty in expressing emotions?

If, like we can suspect it by listening to his dialogue with Vincent (S01E08), his father was violent (to him, to his mother or both), he could have learnt to hide his emotions to survive. Now a grown-up, he doesn’t know how to express them the right way.

Or he is shy/introvert. I already talked about that in a previous post, but Aaron is a shy guy, who pull himself away, who avoid spotlights and who don’t want to disturb people around with his problems. Laughing out loud, ranting loudly or shouting out of rage, it’s not his temper (for the last point, we can flatten it because we know that he’s able to yell to be the bad cop (S04E13), because something touched him personally (the husband who beat his wife in Alaska) or because we’re stepping on his toes (he’s mad at Jordan because she defied his authority in front of everyone and she lied to witnesses to obtain information, two things he doesn’t like at all)).

Or he doesn’t simply know how to express them. He’s not able to identify them clearly, so he adopts a neutral expression, which cracks when he’s feeling the strongest emotions (joy, sadness, or anger). And that is closed to autistic’s features.

He stares at people

It’s impossible to not note that point. Spencer himself said at the beginning of season 5 that he had never seen Hotch blink since his arrival at the BAU.

Neurotypical people don’t do that. During a conversation, gaze moves all the time: it could stay put for a moment, but it’ll move when the person will try to remember something, think to what they’re going to say, watch at something around or be attracted by a movement somewhere near. It’s not what Hotch do: he stares continuously at the person who he’s talking to or who’s talking to him. He looks away when he estimates that the conversation is over. And no matter the status of the one in front of him.

And autists are known for having trouble with how they’re supposed to place their gaze during a conversation: they can stare at everything else but the people in front of them (that’s what Spencer do), or they do like Hotch. In an episode of L&O: CI, Goren and Eames faced an autistic suspect who has learnt to not stare at people after a certain amount of time. Well, it’s not a reliable source (far from it), but we find again the fact that autists can stare intensely at people.

And, as a shy person, I can assure you that we don’t do such thing (on a contrary, we’d rather look away to not be perceived as intrusive or aggressive).

Now, let’s talk about his less obvious features that can attest his neuro-divergency.

Proprioception issues

What proprioception is first? To make the thing simple, it’s all the nervous messages continuously sent by every part of our body to our brain and which it uses then to manage our moves and actions. To give you an example: thanks to our proprioception we are able to know that we’re falling and then our brain can order us to rise our arms or to move our foot so we won’t be hurt much, or we will stay standing up. It’s also thanks to our proprioception that we know that we’re hungry, thirsty, cold, hot, sleepy, or hurt.

Autistic people have trouble with their proprioception because they don’t recognize their internal sensations: they can be hurt and don’t notice or suffer from sunstroke without being conscious of it.

And we can see many times Hotch being hurt and still continues to act like everything is fine. In New York, despite is ripped eardrum and his many wounds, he runs everywhere like a young puppy (adrenaline can do the trick however). When he stops that unsub provoking a car crash, he’s stunned but still ready to chase him (S04E23). When his ear bleeds again, still in New York, he doesn’t pay attention (but, again, adrenaline can have anesthetic effects).

We can counterargue underlying that he may pretends to not worry his men (because he’s shy, remember), but in Route 66 episode, he suffers from internal bleeding without him to notice anything. He realizes that he’s not okay a few seconds before he passes out (so hours after the beginning of the problem). And that, it can’t be allocate to his will to not disturb people around (the “excuse me” can be, cf. my previous post).

We can also add that, very often, we see all the other characters drinking coffee and eating, when he doesn’t. He does when everyone is around a table at the end of a mission (Las Vegas, in that Mexican restaurant, etc.), but it could be led by a group effect: he’s not specifically hungry, he just follows his subordinates.

And we can’t count the number of time where he’s awake late at night. In fact, the simple fact that he’s at Quantico very early in the morning and very late at night induces that he doesn’t sleep much. JJ and Emily both have remarks about it: first one saying that he stays as much as she does (S03E09) and the second one asking when he slept (S04E08).

All that can be signs of his autism.

Hyper-fixation

Hyper-fixation is not only to be interested by a subject to the point to collect everything about it and to do deep research about it. Any music band, movie or TV shows fan could fit in that box. No, hyper-fixation designates the fact that the person who suffers from it deep dives so much into their task that they forget to answer their most basic needs of their body, like eating, drinking, going to restrooms, cleaning themselves, or sleeping. It’s not harmless, far from it.

And Hotch is a master to stay late at night without sleeping (I won’t do the list of every episode where he’s the only one left on the sixth floor or where he’s working in his bedroom when all the other sleep). And to think that he also forgets to eat and to drink, there’s only one step to do.

We can put that on the fact that he’s not especially motivated to go back to his place after his divorce, but he was already doing it when he was married (to Haley’s dismay) and he’s still doing it when his son is waiting for him (and it’s very kind of his ex-sister-in-law to take care of him in his place).

And for his hotel insomnia, we can suggest that his (extreme) professional conscience pushes him to continue to work far after the usual schedule. But the others are not less conscientious, and they sleep.

So, it’s possible that in addition to the fact that he doesn’t feel his body calls, he can also lose notion of time and space regularly. And that fits with the autistic Hotch hypothesis.

Change issues

Autists can have difficulties to apprehend and handle changes in their daily routine. We can see it with Spencer who is very disturbed by Gideon and Blake’s departure, who are two people with who he had a strong connection.

And we can see it also with Hotch who shows difficulties to adapt to changes. First, he’s always wearing the same outfit, even when it’s not necessary (we see it with the others: suit and tie are not mandatory), which means that he’s following a daily routine.

Then, when JJ has to leave the first time, he expresses his discomfort multiple times: he doesn’t appreciate the news of her pregnancy first (S03E20), he underlines that they’re going to be lost without her (S04E05) and, most of all, he struggles a lot to accept Jordan Todd’s presence in his team. Some will say that it’s because he’s sexist and racist, but it’s forgotten that JJ is a woman, that Derek is a POC and that, later, he’ll hire Tara willingly.

We don’t have many elements on the way he adapts to Jack’s presence in his daily life after Haley’s death (we only know that Jessica takes care of him most of the time, but he taught him to read and he and JJ clearly help themselves to drive their children to school), so it’s difficult to dig more in this feature. Moreover, that this aspect is reduced, then muted in the following seasons.

No social life

Unlike all the other members of his team who interact with people who are not federal agents (JJ and Spencer with their mother, Derek with his mother, his sisters and his aunt, Emily and her childhood friends, Penelope and her brothers, and Dave with his ex-wives, his daughter, his grandson and a certain amount of acquaintances), Hotch has no interaction with someone else but his team and other federal agents (curiously, mostly women). Outside of them, he interacts only with Jack and Jessica. Even Spencer is seen with former classmates (S02E18, S07E11).

There are several explanations for this.

It may be a hole in the script because the writers didn’t want to dig into this aspect of the character (we already see him a lot on the screen, the others need some space too). So, he has friends, but we don’t know them.

Or he doesn’t have any. Because he never succeeded to make some or because he wasn’t able to keep contact with them through time. In any case, it can be relevant of the fact that, like many autists, social interactions are landmine field for him. He can’t analyze emotions of people around him, as he can’t analyze his, so he avoids interacting with strangers or, when he does, he doesn’t act the right way and people run away from him.

Knowing that he is a profiler, it makes this suggestion absurd, unless if you think that he’s only able to identify specific behavior from sociopaths and everything else is just nonsense for him. We see multiple times that his reactions or replies provoke astonishment for the people who are not part of his team.

But it can also fit with the shyness theory. When you are shy and/or introvert, talking to stranger is hard as hell. As so, shy people don’t have many friends and/or acquaintances.

[Well, yes, I forgot: he has his brother - and they don't appreciate each other - and his former father-in-law - who hates him deeply.]

Tactless

I don’t think any of you will contradict me on that point, but Hotch can be very direct. And he doesn’t hesitate, and he doesn’t seem to care about the consequences of his words on his target’s hubris or self-esteem.

And, for someone who studies to become a lawyer/prosecutor, it’s quite peculiar: he’s supposed to be eloquent, to know how to handle the verb, and to be able to reel people; instead, he humiliates a lawyer in front of the Court underlying his too short pants, his low-cost clothes, and his habits of (bad) gambler. He could have used statistics to make his point but preferred this brutal method (S03E19).

And he acts like that many times during the show: he says to Strauss that she’s a bad mother, he scolds Prentiss at the beginning of their cohabitation, he is harsh multiple times with Derek, Penelope, Jordan, and with police officers and others… well, many examples. The guy is upfront, and he doesn’t care about good manners. He says what he thinks.

By the way, we can remark that politics and him don’t match. Every time he has to play a political game, he refuses, or he fails in the end (S02E11, S02E16, S04E16). To lie, to be a hypocrite, bowing, it’s not his thing. Which means that he’s more the frank type.

If we add to this that it’s more than obvious that he was doing well with Kate Joyner who was also the frank type, we can suppose that he appreciates honest and direct people, like him. Why? Maybe because he doesn’t get innuendo, unspoken, pretense… that are, I think, difficult to catch for autists.

However, we can’t totally discard the fact that he is also the provocative type. We know that he has a juvenile record and that he can be very sarcastic, which means that behind his good manners and his controlled speech, he has a rebellious temper and a real issue with authority. The fact that he wasn’t much expressive can’t help us determine when he voluntarily speaks frankly to have a reaction or when he hurts people by mistake.

Rigidity

Hotch is stiff. And I don’t say that because is as straight as a chopstick. No, he’s mentally stiff. Derek says that he is a drill-sergeant and JJ, a bully, which means that their boss is quite uncompromising. About what? We don’t really know, but as he read/write all the reports of his team members, that he asks Emily for a missing piece in her report and that he tramples on Derek when he did the correction of his draft (when Derek noticed that they don’t have enough for a profile), we can suggest that he’s uber fussy about that.

Seeing how he’s mad at Jordan when he catches her lying to the family of a victim, we understand that he hates that. As much as he hates when his men play solo (Spencer, Seaver, Derek) putting themselves in danger and/or putting all the team in danger – notice that HE can. He also hates when people give nicknames to serial killers.

Maybe this is going to be a headcanon, but I think that Hotch is typically the kind of person who is incapable of breaking rules; rules made by society/the institution he works for (ex: driving above the speed limits/having an intimate relationship with one of his subordinates) or rules made by himself (ex: not lying to witnesses during an investigation). To break these rules asks him a real effort and he’s immediately uncomfortable with it. And when he sees people around breaking them, he’s as much uncomfortable (he’s tolerating Kevin around Penelope in the limits he has made).

This struggle can come from his autism.

Anxiety

First of all, it’s important to say that if autists suffer of anxiety (because of everything above), it doesn’t mean that every anxious people are autistic nor that every autist is anxious. But it’s part of the many symptoms of autism.

This said, let’s go back to Hotch who is with no doubt an anxious guy. We see him regularly expressing nervous tics when he’s in an uneasy situation for him: he presses his fingers into his fists, he digs his nails into his skin, he bites his lips, etc.

The fact that he’s always wearing the same outfit and that he sticks to a daily routine is typical of anxious people, because it’s a way for them to soothe their anguish. The shyness is also a factor of anxiety and, we see it, that outside of a professional context, Aaron is not the coolest person ever: he’s clumsy with Jack, he’s clumsy with Beth, he’s clumsy with this woman Dave pushes into his arms, etc. Actually, he’s uneasy every time he’s not protected anymore by his suit and his FBI badge. He’s uneasy when he has to go out of his comfort zone and when he’s facing random events he can’t control.

Besides, Hotch says to Derek that he’s writing his subordinates’ reports for them. He adds that it’s to give his agents more free time – it’s probably the official reason he gives to himself – but, for real, it’s because, as an anxious guy, it reassures him.

Peculiar sense of humor

When Hotch tried to motivate his men to throw at him his worst defaults, he started saying he has no sense of humor.

But, for real, he has one. His humor is really dry: he says his humorous lines with the same monochord tone as usual and his face shows no sign that could help people around to guess that it’s supposed to be fun. So, you really need to know him well to catch that.

Hotch: "I'm wearing it [his cape]"

But he clearly has a sense of humor: we can see it with JJ, with Beth, with Spencer, with Dave, etc. Haley asked him, as her last words, to show their son how funny he can be, how he was able to make her laugh. He can also be very sarcastic, which is another form of humor.

He’s able to understand puns too because we can see him smile and laugh multiple times, but we can also notice that sometimes he takes the lines right to the letter (S04E07).

And autistic people don’t necessarily have the same sense of humor than neurotypical people: they can laugh on something that won’t be funny for neurotypicals or not laugh on something that will make other people laugh (ex: the remark about the flowers in the middle of a crime scene).

Huge knowledges

It’s a point I put very low on the list because as he always avoids the light, Hotch doesn’t expose his real knowledge (on the reverse, Spencer talks a lot about what he knows, not necessarily at the best time). But we can guess, paying very attention, that the guy is quite clever.

First of all, we hear him quoting books or recognizing quotes, exactly like Spencer. Which means that he memorized precisely what he has read. Which is not easy at all (try to quote me a book you love you’ve read ten years ago. Difficult, isn’t it?).

Then, we catch from one spare line here and there that he has many knowledges: he collected pennies when he was a kid, he knows the meaning of tarot card, he recognizes the scale model of a James Bond car, he knows theatre (even if he was a poor actor), etc.; it’s quite an heterogenous knowledge but he can spill it anytime it’s needed.

And we can’t forget that he was in law school to become a federal prosecutor, which induce that he studied for years and that he has to remember a ton of laws for all the country.

Ability to understand autistic people

Hotch is, at multiple times, the only one able to follow Spencer complicate reasonings. Now, Spencer is undoubtedly autistic (and if you think he’s not, I invite you to rewatch the show). What can make us think that he can understand him because he has the same way of thinking.

---

With all this, we can add his singular way of speaking (monochord tone, polished language), the fact that he doesn’t talk about his feelings to his relatives (there was clearly a communication issue between him and Haley), and his huge empathy for his subordinates (about whom he worries a lot all the time).

Actually, you have to keep in mind that a good part of this troubles can be explained by his rough childhood he seems to have had (“seems” because the only real thing we know is that his father was unfaithful, period), his anxiety, and his natural shyness too.

But, for me, he’s autistic and he doesn’t know it. It’s not the reason why I felt for him (this point of view hit me way after I started to write about him) and it doesn’t make him any sexy-er or something, it’s just a part of his character I add to the pile of the many aspects of his personality. It’ll be briefly treated in my main CM fanfic: “Code Name: Mom”, but deeply treated in my two Hotchniss fanfics. So, don’t be surprised if you read from time-to-time innuendos about his neuro-divergency, it’s on purpose.

And happy autism acceptance month everyone! 😊

(And remember, this is a personal point of view, you perfectly have the right to think differently. ;) )

#criminal minds #aaron hotchner #hotch #agent hotchner #autism

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