#aspd traits

[bathroomflooder]

people with low/no empathy don't need to "make up" for it by having sympathy. It's completely okay to have neither :)

[maybe-an-aspd-angel]

[divinerapturesys]

Welcome to my Ted Talk about AsPD, or Antisocial Personality Disorder, which the internet likes to coin as sociopath 👌🏻 if you don’t like long infodumps about stigmatized mental disorders from someone who is diagnosed, move on.

Quick toxic rundown: People with AsPD are generally characterized as emotionless, violent, manipulative abusers who kill animals and like to make other people their bitches. The biggest pet peeve we have is the emotionless, sadistic and abusive generalization.

Personally, we are highly neurotic, with highs and lows of: depression, frantic drive, self abuse tactics, chronic fear, lapses of rejection, overwhelming over-analyzation, grey area thinking, false goods and false bads, ultimatums, obsessive compulsive behavior, harsh self demands, and irritability.

AsPD is a disorder that is caused primarily (according to current research) by trauma and abuse in childhood; most notably being emotional neglect and absent caregivers that cause a child to have emotional shutdowns and repression episodes in an attempt to self soothe. Primary caregivers who do not bond with their children are also a factor. Children learn how to behave from those around them. If a primary caregiver is emotionally distant and unavailable, children will learn that is normal behavior and that’s how people are. If a primary caregiver does not provide empathy and sympathy during moments of distress and fear, children will learn that aloofness and disregard of others feelings is normal behavior. If a primary caregiver does not keep a child safe, children will learn that they should not prioritize their own safety or the safety of others. You can find my follow up post regarding this here.

Neglected and abused children often act out trying to get attention and help, often acting out in bad ways because they lack the ability to articulate what they’re feeling and what is happening to them. The pipeline for AsPD typically is: Oppositional Defiance Disorder as a child, Conduct Disorder as a teen, AsPD as an adult. There are a lot of warning signs cueing that AsPD is becoming a risk for development, but often kids do not have a support system to help negate it as it’s their support system that is usually a factor in its creation.

Being AsPD is like being an emotional La Croix 70% of the time. If you’re depressed, then it’s like someone in the other room has depression and is telling you about it. The other 30% of the time, if you’re depressed, your brain doesn’t understand how to handle it so it’s an ultimatum between doing something drastic to remove the Trigger or ignoring and dissociating for days on end.

People with AsPD are very good at ignoring things. Honestly it’s problematic as fuck but it’s not hard to ignore major issues when you just, don’t care. It’s not in the terms of being cruel or making ourselves not care, but the fact that finding the emotional willpower is so far out of our feasible reach we don’t do it. This causes us to piss people off because we don’t have the capacity to care as much as they want us to, even if we can and do to an extent.

Think of it this way: empathy/sympathy is a deep tub of water that everyone has. They can easily fill their measuring cup for the needed amount of empathy without any issues and it’s easy for them. People with AsPD don’t have a tub of water. We have shallow skillet. When we try to dip our cup to fill it, we can’t, it always comes up short and it is difficult to get any water in it as there is no room for the cup to dive. Our ability to care is limited because we do not have the same emotional resources everyone else does.

❌ False Positives & False Negatives ❌

I operate on what I’ve learned are called false positives and false negatives. These are things that are trained into the brain from an early age based off of childhood trauma and other factors. False positives are a distorted version of why we do something to help ourself and for our own good, meanwhile a false negative is something we do because it’s a threat, or based out of fear.

❌ Some of my false positives:

- It is good to be afraid of nothing

- It is good to adapt to someone’s personality if they are stronger than you

- It is good to isolate yourself

- It is good to be a silver tongue because you can get into any place you want

- It is good to become a social chameleon and shape yourself to whatever those around you need/want most, because then you have no chance of being abandoned

❌ Some of my false negatives, which can explain the false positives as well as core beliefs:

- it is bad to be afraid, if I am afraid then I am vulnerable and it can be used against me

- It is bad to be emotional or show concern for others emotions because they do not care for mine

- It is bad to be able to be exploited, because I believe it is everywhere

- It is bad to allow myself to be bored, because boredom begets bad thoughts and no one can or wants to help me when I spiral

- It is bad to not shape yourself to the social circle, because people quickly grow tired of those who do not match them perfectly and being discarded means I failed

My core beliefs can be viewed as the root for the false positives and negatives, because they are based on the core of trauma, abuse and neglect. They come from patterns and instances that make someone with AsPD become the opposite of what they experienced:

- eat or be eaten

- If I don’t show that my bite is worse than my bark, I will be taken advantage of and I must remain on top because the ones on top are safe

- I must look out for myself because nobody will do it for me

- It doesn’t matter what happens to me, therefore it doesn’t matter what people think of me

- If I cannot do something well, then I should not do it at all

- If you are dependent on others for emotional and mental well being, you are weak, therefore I must isolate myself to avoid becoming codependent and a burden and useless

- If I can handle the stress of a situation better than everyone else, therefore I will keep the problem (financial, emotional, mental, etc) to myself to reduce chances of being abandoned due to failure of perfection

People with AsPD are hard to get along with. We often:

- are always anticipating a fight

- lack respect for authority

- ignore social structures to an extent

- tendency to lie if it’ll lessen punishment or if we feel the lie is more acceptable than our actions

- limit social support because it’s wrong to be dependent on others

- have an inflated view of our own importance — which turns into a self ridicule for believing someome like me could be found important to others —

- can be rude and inconsiderate of others feelings somewhat unintentionally

- are unable to read the correct social cues in relation to empathy towards people and animals

- am constantly confused by others dependence upon empathy and inability to make desicions from logic based standpoints

We can’t speak for everyone who has AsPD, nor are we saying that no one with AsPD is capable of being a murderer/abuser etc. but we are saying that y’all need to stop automatically classifying someone as a certain “type” as soon as you know about their disorder.

One last thing I do want to point out is that it is not uncommon for people with AsPD to derive some sort of enjoyment in causing harm, doing something illegal, hurting someone or animals, etc. This entirely stems from lack of environmental control as a child. Being able to control what happens to others or being able to control the things you say or do that hurts someone else is a hefty high to get addicted to; it soothes the underlying itch of not being able to control your own trauma and abuse, so in turn you push these behaviors onto others and enjoy it because it gives you a sense of power and control. Some people with AsPD do genuinely love hurting others, and some enjoy hurting others when they believe it’s deserved or their ire has been stoked. Some enjoy causing pain to those they think deserve it, and others don’t care who they hurt as long as they feel like they’re in control of the situation.

Hope this have some insight into AsPD 🤙🏻 if y’all have any questions, shoot.

[evilsystemm]

QPR but in the narc4narc way where normal relationship labels can't even begin to explain how special and superior our connection is

[hoagsobject]

Googles advice on how to write an apology

“Show empathy”

[stalekisses]

barely surviving this week <3

[truthful-apologiesxoxo]

One thing that people with mental disorders besides cluster B disorders will never fully understand is that it’s near impossible for us to get help. Not saying that it’s not hard opening up to people about other mental disorders such as depression, but usually if someone opened up about their depression, they’d be responded with sympathy. But for people with cluster b disorders, if we open up about our disorders, we’ll be labeled as fucking psychos who just like manipulating people for pure evil.

[schizocrow]

Guilt ? Never heard about it

[narcissisticpdcultureis]

NPD (+ ASPD traits) culture is genuinely not understanding the concept of unconditional love. Isn’t all love conditional in some way?

“Would you still love me if I was a worm?” Why the fuck would I care about some random worm?

.

[obnebulant-mogai]

NPD + ASPD adjacent flag!

[plain text: NPD + ASPD adjacent flag! /end plain text]

After months, I am still on the rocks as to whether I have ASPD, or just display traits. Maybe there are some things we are never meant to know /ref /lyr /lh

So, I made this flag for NPD + ASPD and adjacent! It is general so it can be used by anyone who has either traits of NPD or ASPD or the disorders themselves.

[ID: Two images. The first image is a flag with nine equal horizontal stripes. In descending order, the stripes are dark blood red, berry red, pale brick red, orange, pale yellow, pale grey blue, lavender purple, dark blue, and purple brown. In the center of the flag, there is a white symbol. The symbol consists of an outline of a narcissus flower with the upside down scale ASPD symbol inside. The second image is a flag identical to the first, but lacking the symbol. End ID.]

Flag by me. Colors sampled from the NPD and ASPD awareness flags. Narcissus outline taken from The Noun Project.

Tagging @mad-pride.

Below the cut, I have included the transparent symbol, as well as CMYK versions of the flags! (If you(&) don't know what that means, it's basically the version of the flag in the colors that a printer would output.)

[ID: A white symbol. The symbol consists of an outline of a narcissus flower with the upside down scale ASPD symbol inside. End ID.]

[ID: Two images. Each image corresponds to one of the flags above. They are extremely similar, but there are slight differences in hue and saturation of some of the colors. End ID.]

[aspd-culture]

ASPD culture is someone who doesn't even know you have ASPD trying to insult you by calling you your exception's "pet psychopath", as if that's not a title I'd wear with pride. Honey I'm barely a pet, I'm a restrained attack dog <3

(cw, caps used in a positive way)

WHAT A GODDAMN MOOD

[maybe-an-aspd-angel]

[evilsystemm]

NPD with ASPD and SzPD traits culture is needing admiration and attention but being unable to stand being around anyone who could give it because they're so unfathomably annoying.

[thecandyispoisoned]

Excuse my lack of response, you just said something that my brain decided is an attack now I hate you until further notice and I'd rather not talk to you because if I do I might say something hurtful and I'm trying to convince myself that I'm a good person

[stalekisses]

I don’t have ASPD in the “crazy obsessive killer, looking to hurt everyone and anyone around him, abusive horrible person who should be in prison” way I actually have it in the “I will never been able to properly love anyone & it destroys me from the inside out, I am broken and undesirable, if anyone gets near me I’ll hurt them before they hurt me” way

[truthful-apologiesxoxo]

Oh my god I’m an awful person 🙁

Oh my godddd 😏 I’m an awful person 🥳‼️😫