#i wanted to do a silly edit with this card but then the vision of her with dark makeup hit the second tower (my brain) and. here we are.

[autism-corner]

RETURN OF THE WIFE.

[mothwingwritings]

Doppo, Shibukawa, Motobe, Biscuit, And Yujiro As Your Sugar Daddy 💄💋✨

Hi everyone!!! Sorry I dipped out for a moment, I had an eventful past two weeks (but some of the event has been writing stuff, so that’s something at least lul) and now I come back offering whatever the hell this is lol. The idea of the Baki men being sugar daddies came to me in a vision while I was supposed to be working, so of course as the responsible individual that I am I focused on that and started writing this and here we are now! :D It’s for all my dilf/gilf lovers out there. You are all lovely little treasures and I adore you all. :*

As you can probably tell by the subject matter of this one, 18+ only please!!!

Thank you for reading!!!

Warnings: Sex, sex work/reader is a sex worker, mentions of various sexual acts, possessive/obsessive tendencies from your clients, dubcon, mentions of noncon, Yujiro Hanma being Yujiro Hanma, mentions of threesomes and open relationships, very little editing.

˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗Doppo Orochi˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

·         Doppo would be an exceptional sugar daddy. He’s attentive and kind to you, both when you are out on dates and when you share private time together, and you can always tell he’s truly excited to spend time with you (even when sex isn’t involved). He loves to spoil you and has the money to back it, gifting you whatever your heart desires, all you have to do is say the word.

·         He’s a big family man, and as such he may push the boundaries a bit of what your relationship is. It’s hard to see him as just a benefactor when he’s sending you good morning and good night texts, inviting you over for home cooked dinners, calling you just so he can hear your voice and talk about silly things, checking in on you to make sure you are safe and happy. It may be pushing the line of what is appropriate and what isn’t for your relationship, but you can’t lie and say it isn’t nice feeling so cared for.

·         That being said, you know Doppo has a wife that he loves very much, so there is no confusion of your role as just a sugar baby in this dynamic. In most cases such a strong spousal bond may cause trouble on your end, but luckily for you Natsue is as fond of you as Doppo is. She’s definitely not as into the sexual aspect of your company as Doppo is, but get ready for plenty of passionate threesomes should the three of you find yourselves together and in the mood.

·         Doppo is very open about sharing his life with you. He invites you to all his matches, you have free access to Shinshin Kai dojo, and after a certain level of trust is reached, he’ll even give you a key to his house. At first it felt strange, like you were bordering on something taboo having so much access to his private life, and you worried you were taking advantage of his hospitality. But as time wore on you realized that his fondness for you was just so great that he wanted you to be a part of his life as much as possible, regardless of what the typical sugar daddy/sugar baby relationship was. However, if the familiarity and closeness ever made you uncomfortable he would end it immediately, reverting back to business as usual (though it would make him extremely sad).

·         His main downside is that he’s definitely very ‘dad-like’ and sometimes you feel more like a child he is over protective of then his beloved sugar baby. His fatherly advice and guidance can be a bit overbearing, and it takes all you have not to roll your eyes at his griping over some of your decisions and future plans.

·         If it doesn’t end up working out with Doppo, he has a hot son you can fall back on :)

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˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗Gouki Shibukawa˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

·         Shibukawa truly is a wild card. You have no idea what to expect when this man calls on your services. He’s hired you for things as mild as enjoying afternoon tea with him and as raunchy as participating in the most degenerate sexual roleplay you can possibly imagine (consensually, of course).

·         So even though he’s one of your older benefactors, he is certainly far from boring. In fact, you can’t help but get excited whenever he reaches out to you, wondering what he may have in store for your meet up.

·         Shibukawa is one of the less sentimental of the sugar daddies. There is definitely no mistaking that your relationship is strictly for pleasure, and as a side effect of that his private life is a virtual mystery to you. You have your suspicions about what he does with his spare time, but should you pry too much he’ll swiftly and efficiently end the conversation, focusing his attention instead on the sweeter side of your affair.

·         However, he is far from cold. Shibukawa always treats you extremely well and pays you even better, so he quickly becomes one of your favorite clients.

·         Also, he’s extremely interesting. This man could make a story about what he ate for breakfast sound like the most fascinating thing on the world, so even if nothing big or exciting happens in the time you spend with him, at the very least you know you won’t ever be bored.

·         Don’t let his age fool you-he is a beast in bed. With age comes experience, and that has never been truer than with Shibukawa. You don’t think you’ve ever quite felt the thrill you get when you have intimate time with Shibukawa with any other client, let alone actual romantic partners you’ve had.

·         His downside is that his mood towards you is always fluctuating. He will be in constant contact with you for weeks at a time and then fall off the face of the earth, only to pop back up expecting you to prioritize him over your other clients. It’s a bit obnoxious, especially if he is your best paying client and you are relying on him financially, yet he refuses to keep you in the loop of any plans he wants to involve you in or meet ups he may be concocting.

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˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗Motobe Izou˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

·         The KING of pet names. I honestly don’t think this man has ever called you your actual name once. Baby, sweetheart, dove, little one-the list goes on. If you called him a pet name back, he would probably have a heart attack brought on by the sheer amount of joy that would bring him.

·         He may not be as wealthy as some of your other clients, but his care and devotion to you are off the charts. Each time he calls on your services he always greets you with flowers or chocolates, and each date he takes you on is to a place you like or recommend, prioritizing your favorites over the stuff he may prefer. He’s at your beck and call; willing to drop everything should your schedule open up and you have the time to spend with him.

·         He’s very protective of you, having legitimate concerns over whether any of your other customers are overly handsy or make you do and participate in things you are uncomfortable with. He tries to play it cool and ask about your health and well-being nonchalantly, but you can tell by the nervous undertone in his voice and the bags under his eyes that his fretting over you and your profession wears heavily upon him, affecting his day to day life.

·         He’s also low-key scared that you prefer other clients over him (even though you have never done anything to make him perpetuate this idea), so he stresses himself out over that as well.

·         Motobe is an incredibly intimate lover. He takes his time with you, committing to memory which of his actions brings you the most pleasure so that he can use them time and time again to drive you wild. Every caress of his hand and kiss of his lips is gentle and loving, he treats you as if you are the most precious being on the planet earth and it never ceases to make you melt.

·         That being said, he has the toughest time distinguishing boundaries in your relationship, constantly blurring the lines between professional and personal. Anyone that interacts with the two of you can see just how head over heels for you he is, and more often than not when out and about people just assume you are spouses based solely on how openly affectionate and lovey dovey he is with you. His doting can be rather heavy-handed, not to mention disconcerting, especially when you work so hard to establish clear boundaries with him.

·         … But still, you can’t find yourself being too upset at Motobe. Even when he takes things too far, Motobe is certainly the most caring client you’ve had, earnestly watching over you and taking the best care of you he can with the limited time he has with you. Even with all his quirks, you have a definite soft spot for the man.

·         And who knows? Maybe someday when you seek another line of work and leave this one behind you can go on an actual date with him? He’ll most certainly be waiting on you, more than ready to make it official. :)

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˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗Biscuit Oliva˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

·         If Biscuit is yoursugar daddy, my dear you have it MADE.

·         He is the IDEAL sugar daddy. He’s handsome, sweet, wealthy, and not afraid to lavish you in all of the finer things. It’s not uncommon for you to go out on a date with him only to come home in a new designer outfit of your choice, decked out in a varying level of jewels he let you pick out yourself.

·         And it’s not just material possessions, he loves taking you on all kind of exotic trips and vacations, taking you to places you never dreamed you’d be able to go. It makes his heart swell seeing the excitement in your eyes the moment the plane touches down at each new locale, your unbridled joy spurring him to feel just a thrilled by this adventure as you do (even if it’s to a place he has been countless times before).

·         But even when he’s not whisking you off to fun and foreign places, he always makes every date exciting. Regardless of if it’s small meet up, or a full on whirlwind adventure, there is never a dull moment with Biscuit.

·         Being with him is like an honest to god fairytale, you feel like some kind of royalty whenever you are in his presence. He dotes on you to the extreme, showering you in affection, praise, and gifts. You’ve never felt more beautiful or important than you do when you are with Biscuit.

·         All that being said, this man really makes you earn the title of sugar baby. His sex drive is off the charts and he has an insatiable attraction to you, which means the moment he sees you, he’s on you. Of course he shows decorum out in public, presenting as the perfect gentleman on any dates he escorts you on while out in the public eye. But the moment you two are behind closed doors? Prepare to be absolutely ravished. You probably won’t be able to walk for a few days once he’s done.

·         Like Doppo, you are aware that Biscuit already has a special lady in his life. As such, Biscuit made sure that you were someone that Maria was not just OK with, but someone she genuinely liked. You take that kind of as a badge of honor, as Maria has a tendency to be very picky with the people she surrounds herself with. But the two of you hit it off within minutes of meeting each other, which is a huge relief to both you and Biscuit.

·         You’re not expected to participate in the ‘sugar’ end of the deal with Maria, but should you show interest in Maria in that way, Biscuit would be over the moon. Whether it be a threesome or just the two of you together while he watched, he’ll be absolutely delighted either way (and expect to be handsomely compensated for the good time. ;). Just don’t start liking each other more than him, OK? He would probably pass away from heart break if the two of you left him in the dust. ^^;

·         The biggest down side to having Biscuit as your sugar daddy is that he can be a bit… much. He’s exceptionally clingy, to the point that you have to completely silence or shut off your phone sometimes because he’s always calling or texting you for some reason or another-even when you are with other clients. He also HEAPS on the affection so much that you feel suffocated by it, which is a lot on its own, let alone from a person you aren’t even in a committed relationship with. When you try and ask him to ease up, or even just straight up ignore him for a bit, it only makes his dogged affection worse. :/

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˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗Yujiro Hanma˗ˏˋ ♡ ˎˊ˗

·         The fact that you even became the Ogre’s sugar baby is baffling, and honestly a rather scary and precarious situation for you to be stuck in.

·         The thought that he would actually pay for something so many people would willingly supply to him, or that he could simply take from another person, must mean he finds you extremely interesting. Whether that’s a good or bad thing is to be determined.

·         You don’t ever get a heads up for your liaisons with Yujiro-the man just shows up when he desires your company and that’s that. It doesn’t matter if you are sleeping, with another client, or otherwise engaged, Yujiro ALWAYS takes precedence and you better remember that if you want him to keep paying you.

·         That being said, he gets rather territorial of you when he sees you or hears about you with other clients. Not necessarily jealous (what is there to be jealous of? He’s leagues better than those losers and everyone knows it), but definitely disgruntled that despite his patronage you still choose other men to attend to. You should feel honored to have him as a patron, indebted to the point where he is your soul focus. The fact that you aren’t definitely pushes his buttons.

·         As stated, being Yujiro’s sugar baby is definitely a perilous situation to be in. He is interested in you enough to spend time and money on you, but you would never delude yourself into thinking he held any sort of romantic attraction towards you. You are merely a source of pleasure and entertainment, which in and of itself is fine, that is your profession after all.  But once your use to him ended… where does that leave you? With all other clients they simply moved on, but Yujiro is like an untamed beast. If he gets upset with you in anyway, getting extremely hurt by him is a very real possibility.

·         Also- he’s the strongest being on the planet. He could kill you without batting a lash, whether by accident or on purpose. Merely being in his presence is a daunting experience, and while you’ve dealt with strong and/or questionable clients in the past, Yujiro is a breed all his own. Simply put-he scares you, and he is by far the most dangerous person you’ve ever had to interact with.

·         Everything about your relationship is filled with uncertainty. Sometimes your dates are good- he’ll take you out to nice places to do exciting things and may even get you a gift or two. But more often than not his ‘dates’ (if you can even call them that) are chaotic and abrupt, leaving you in pain and out of it for days.

·         He’s EXTREMELY demeaning as well, calling you whore or slut more than your actual name. He especially likes to belittle you during sexual acts, reminding you of what a useless and weak piece of meat you are as he pounds into you mercilessly. The berating gets even worse when/if you start to feel pleasure from the acts. He enjoys it immensely when you put up a resistance to his advances, only to becoming a slavering mess, completely drunk off his cock.

·         Receiving money from Yujiro is very dependent on his mood and how much fun he had while in your company. There are days when you leave your dates loaded with cash with very little effort, and times when you go above and beyond to please home only to receive a small amount of income. Honestly though, the days when you receive more cash can be worse than when he barely pays you-he is apt to lord it over you and expect more unsolicited favors from you in response to his act of benevolence.

·         The worst part of this whole arrangement is that you don’t have a say in any of it. Any person in their right mind would reject Yujiro as a client no matter how attractive or wealthy he may be, but you were never given that luxury. The moment he took an interest in you, you became irrevocably tied to him with no hope of shaking him.  You would be forced to serve him until he grows tired of you- you just hope that when his interest in you wanes it means your freedom and not your untimely demise. :)

[wjhik]

Buzzkill (Trent Alexander-Arnold)

A/N: Warnings: unnecessarily angry Y/N (ur a bitch) Y/N's POV:

It was media day. I was dreading this day. The boys, however, loved it. They loved spending time with each other, but the blood, sweat, and tears they had to put into training everyday made it slightly miserable for them. Media day was a day for them to spend time together. They get to goof off together all day. The only work they would be doing for the entirety of the day would be posing for pictures.

On the other hand, for me, media day was a nightmare. As the media manager of Liverpool FC, this day was MY day. Everything I say goes. With that comes a lot of work. From approving outfits to keeping the boys from flipping off the camera, out of my 9 months in total of working a year(idk if that is normal i dont work), media days are most important. Trent insists on torturing me on this day alone. He is normally a very calm being, but on this day, he's the devil in disguise.

I'm sitting at my table that is set up right behind the set where Cody and Virgil are posing for their photos. I ignore the lights flashing in my peripheral vision and continue flicking through the hundreds of photos, trying to narrow it down to the best 10. "Y/N, I just wanted to run these by you." Maggie comes up to me with her camera and scrolls through countless photos. "You have to up the exposure. They're too dark. " I reply to her. She goes back to Virgil and Cody and tells them they're done for the day. They walk off set and back into the gaming room with the rest of the boys. I stand up to get the next group of guys.

I walk into the gaming room. All I can hear is curses and screaming. A very intense game of fifa is going on along with a game of chess. "Trent, your turn. Come on." I say looking up from my clipboard and around the room, looking for the man I'm talking to. He looks up from his chess game and locks eyes with me. Hearts floating in his eyes, he says, "Hmm? What did you say?" "Get up, Trent. I don't have time." I say, bitterly. He stands up, noticing my frustrated state, and starts walking with me towards the set. "What's got you in a twist?" He asks me, his hand moving up my back to comfort me. "Nothing. Hey, stop it!" I snap at him, typing away on my phone. I don't hear a cheeky remark, so I decide to look up at Trent. He's looking at me with puppy eyes, genuinely hurt. "Hey, I'm sorry. I'm just really stressed out. I'm loosing my mind here, Trent." I sigh. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. You didn't deserve that." He stays quiet, but the way his eyes soften tells me he forgives me.

I'm back to my computer and Trent is laughing away, taking photos with the boss. "Is everyone done?" Trent asks Maggie. "Yeah, we're all done." Maggie replies. "Can we mess around a bit?" Trent asks me for my approval. "Yeah, whatever. But, Maggie, give me the SD card." I say, shooing Trent away. Maggie gives me the SD card and I put it into my computer, finally having most of the photos. The only ones we need now are the group photos, then this nightmare of a day will be over.

"Baby, get in here!" Trent yells across the room to me. Him, Jurgen, and Virgil are giggling like school girls, taking silly photos. Trent knows I don't like it when he calls me that at work. I get enough shit for being appointed as manager straight out of college and coincidentally being Trent Alexander-Arnold's girlfriend. I don't need to be accused of being unprofessional now, too.

I can feel my ears steaming and my face turning red. I simply ignore him to try to keep calm. I already snapped at him for being concerned about me, I don't need to do it again. "Y/N!! C'mon!!" Trent yells. "Don't be a buzzkill!" One of the boys says. Those words ring through my ears. Me? A buzzkill? I could've been out of here, editing the photos in peace. Having a nice cup of tea and cuddling with my boyfriend. Not with Mr. Trent Alexander-Arnold, legendary Liverpool player that doesn't have time to spend his breaks with his girlfriend. I could be at home with Trentski. The one that needs comfort and cuddles onto me like a koala, not the one that won't bat an eyelid at me because his friends are around.

But, no. I'm here. Because I let these boys mess around and have some fun. But, I'm a buzzkill? I stand up from my seat and the chair nearly flips backward. The giggles and chatter instantly stop. "All of you. Back in the room, now." Pointing at the boys, leaving Jurgen out. (jurgen disrespect will not be tolerated here) "Y/N, listen. We were just messing aroun-" Trent tries to keep me from blowing up. He can sense how angry I am. "Now." I interrupt him, coldly. "But baby I-" "GO." I raise my voice, slightly. Not enough to be considered a scream, but enough to convey my anger. The boys walk back into the game room with their heads down. Jurgen comes up to me and puts his hand on my shoulder. I look up at him and he gives me a "It'll all be okay" look. I nod at him and smile.

I step outside of set to give myself a breather, as well as the crew a little time to rest before taking group photos with all the boys. Was I too hard on them? Maybe I shouldn't have gotten mad at them. All these thoughts are running through my head as I think back on Trent expressions when I yelled at them.

Trent's POV:

"You alright?" Virgil comes up to me and places a hand on my shoulder. "Yeah. I'm okay. I just feel bad. I know how stressed Y/N's been and I didn't mean to insult her." I sigh and have my head down. She's my girl, and I hurt her. Virgil tries to comfort me by telling me that she was in the wrong. In reality, I'm not trying to be right, I just want her to be happy. "Go get changed. You'll feel better." Hendo suggests. I take his advice and stand up. I'm thinking of all the way I can cheer her up. Maybe take her out for ice cream? She loves that.

Y/N's POV:

I had my breather and I feel much better now. I'm going to apologize to Trent and the boys after the shoot. Lets just get this done. I walk back onto set and head to my desk. I grab the SD card and walk over to Maggie, where she's enjoying her sandwich. "Maggie, once you're done eating get all the boys for me, yeah?" I say to her. She immediately finishes her last bite and dusts off her hands on her trousers. She brings her hand up to her mouth to cover it and says, "What for?" I then say, "For the group photos, remember?" She looks like she saw a ghost. "Oh! Yes, of course! I'll do that now!" She scurries away. Okay, that was weird.

A decent amount of time passes and no Maggie or boys are to be found. I decide to check in on them myself. I walk over to the game room and see Maggie standing outside it, staring at the door, looking frightened. "Maggie? Are you alright? Where are the boys?" I ask her, placing my hand on her back, trying to comfort her. "I think you should take a look for yourself." She says after noticing I'm not mad. She walks away. I place my hand on the door and open it. My eyes instantly fill with anger. The sight was disgusting for someone who spent hours trying to get these men ready. Most of them were half naked, the new kits they were modelling spread around the place. The one thing they had to do was be ready. "Hey, Y/N." Trent says with a smile. "What the fuck???" I question in pure confusion and anger. The team was taken back by my use of language, always insisting on staying professional. "Maggie said we were done for the day." Trent says, looking at my angry expression. "I cannot do this right now." I say throwing my hands up in defeat. I rush to set, take my laptop, SD card, and car keys and rush out the door in a fit of tears.

I'm trying to wipe away my tears with my sleeve, when I realize I forgot my jacket inside. At first, I think "Fuck it, I'll come back for it tomorrow", but then I realize what jacket it is. I wore Trent's academy hoodie, far too small for him now. "Fuck." I think to myself. I pivot myself on my heels 180 degrees and walk back into the training center. I hurriedly stomp towards where I was sitting, trying to avoid anyone and everyone. I search around my table, unable to find it. "Looking for your jacket?" I turn around to see a very apologetic looking Trent with my jacket in his hand. "Here." He hands it to me. "Thank you." I say, looking down as I walk away from him. If I look at him right now, I will break his face. He grabs ahold of my arm and brings me into a hug. I need it right now, so I don't resist. I pull away from him and he's holding my face. "I'll see you at home." I say, leaving him behind, but letting him know we're okay.

Trent's POV:

"Why was she mad?" "What happened" "Is she okay?" All these questions made me realize something. "Guys...Group photos." I say, mentally facepalming. A series of "ooohhh"s and "oh yeah"s followed that realization. "We have to do this." I say to them. They all moan and groan about not wanting to and being too lazy, however make it work.

"Maggie, we have to do these photos for Y/N." I say to her in a panic. "I would, if I could Trent, but she took the SD card." She says, defeatedly. I know she's been working so hard today as well. "Here, use this. Everyone in positions!!" I shove my phone at her and turn back to the boys who are in their designated spots, like Y/N showed us a while back. Maggie giggles at me slightly, but takes the photos. She does the best she can with the phone. "Alright, now a heart." I say to the boys after taking the serious photos. I think this will make Y/N feel loved by us.

After the photos are taken, I get changed again and head home. I stop by a flower shop and buy her a bouquet of her favorite flowers. I get her some snacks and sweets on the way home as well. I finally get home and open the front door. There she is, on the couch, looking so exhausted. "Hey, baby." She looks up at me, tucked in her blanket. "Hey." She says, so tiredly. I know she's mad at me. She just doesn't have the energy to fight me right now.

Y/N's POV:

I'm so sleepy. Trent got me flowers. "I'm sorry for getting so mad and frustrated today." I say, opening up my banket cocoon for him to join me on our abnormally wide couch. "I know how hard you were working. I'm so sorry it didn't go smoothly baby." He's so sweet. He got yelled at all day, and now he's apologizing to me. "If it makes you feel any better, I managed to get the group photos taken. They were taken on my phone, so they're not amazing, but it's what we got. Wanna see?" He did that for me? "Baby, I love you so much. Thank you. I could care less about how they look right now. I'm just glad it got taken." I say, dozing off into his chest. "C'mon, Y/N/N. Let's get you to bed." Is the last thing I heard. The perfect ending to the not so perfect day.

A/N: First post on tumblr.

Wattpad: funkyfishfeet

DM for requests

[kateandanthonyaremyparents]

So.... I wrote a silly thing today.. I was playing with the idea that both Kate and Edwina overheard Anthony speaking with some guys at the first ball.. and how Edwina's thoughts on the matter are completely different from Kate's.. and how this changes everything.

Would you like me to explore this in a new fic??? I'll drop the draft below the cut. It needs more detail and I haven't really edited it.. but i think you'll get the idea, from which point I want start this thing, if I do write it..

"You've heard him say what?" Kate looks startled at her sister, her ears ring and it's beyond her imagination Edwina doesn't seem to be bothered by the things she just told her sister.

"Come on, Didi, you yourself were eavesdropping, why do you want me to repeat what Lord Bridgerton said?"

Kate tries to contain herself, her vision is blurry and her head is full, almost too full to comprehend words but she makes an attempt anyway.

"I'm just worried, I don't think the way you interpreted his words are correct…" 

Is her sister really this oblivious?

Her usual confidence is far away and she has trouble staying on her feet. 

"You heard him say he doesn't want to love his wife, right? And that he isn't opposed to a mistress? I want to protect you, Bon. To prevent you from getting hurt."

"Didi," Edwina waves her hand to enhance the mood. "As always, you only see the worst in people, I need you to have an open mind this season. You know how wealthy he is, how he provides for his family, my life would be good, and I'm sure he's going to love the diamond eventually, I'll make sure of this."

Kate is offended, to say the least. Blood rushed through her veins, anger wells up from deep within and for a change, Kate does not plan to hide it.

She always thought of her sister as a compassionate person, a person who was living, just like her, for her family. But if that was true, how dared she insult her this way? How could she, so easily, choose her prospect over a relative? That's just wrong! Kate wouldn't have believed her sister actually uttered those words if she didn't hear her say it herself. Her hands tremble and she clenches her fists to regain some control.

"Is that what you think? About me?" She keeps her voice as even as possible and looks Edwina straight in the eyes.

"You know you have the tendency to overbearing, and as much as I admire your involvement, if you're going to be against my highest prospect, I do not need your help."

"Edwina…" Kate cries out. "Please, you don't mean this."

"But I do, I think I can manage my own season. I was already called the Diamond, things shouldn't be complicated."

Kate can't hide it, she rolls her eyes and frowns deeply. 

"I don't need your judgement, Kate, I suggest you focus on yourself, maybe we both can marry, then you wouldn't have to return to India. I would love having you around." Edwina grabs both of Kate's hands to force her to meet her gaze.

And just like that, Edwina changed back into the sweet, little girl Kate knows her to be. "Kate, you are beautiful, please don't be a wallflower, there will be a nice second son, or third that will try to court you! I know there will be."

She has no idea how incredibly vile her words are

Kate has to swallow hard to make her mouth moist enough to talk without a crackling voice.

Kate narrows her eyes, she wants to make sure Edwina understands her when she speaks. Kate needs to be as thorough as possible, she wants to leave no room for doubt, Edwina needs to know how serious she is.

"Or maybe I just go for Lord Bridgerton himself." 

It pleases Kate more than she cared to admit when she sees Edwina's mouth drop open.

"You don't have a chance, you're six and twenty! You… you're.."

Kate laughs sarcastically, for a minute she's tempted to tell Edwina about her meeting with Lord Bridgerton this morning, but at the last moment she keeps it to herself. Kate's convinced there will come a better moment to play this card. 

Today is not going to be the day she does, the initial shock on her sister's face is fulfilling enough, for now.

[chaoticgeminate]

Some silliness Solecita would be sending Javi throughout the day on Valentines, and also me to you ❤️🧡🩷

HAYLEY THANK YOU SO MUCH I LOVE THEM!

HAPPY VALENTINES DAY MY BELOVED!

Solecita would absolutely send these to Javi! In fact...

"I hate this."

"It's not much longer, mi amor."

Javi whined through the receiver and you giggled gently at the sound as you sat at your desk, the document open on your screen currently being ignored in favor of the phone call. He'd been traveling to and from the set for his film ever since you'd gotten back from holiday, it had been a suggestion for you to minimize traveling only because you'd developed gestational diabetes and the team of physicians Javi employed to your care wanted you to be close in case of any other complications.

"I want to be home with you, it is almost Valentines Day and I am here when I should be home."

Hearing his tone shift to something harsher, angrier, was more than enough proof that the distance was starting to get to him. Your free hand came to rest on your bump gently, typically hidden by baggy hoodies and sweaters whenever you had to go anywhere, and you thought about the white gown hidden in a garment bag in your closet that was just waiting for the day to come.

Javi had no idea you'd arranged for a small backyard style wedding, that you'd used Murch and Dieter's extensive list of contacts to help you arrange the set-up and break down of the decor and Lorna had been delighted when you called her up to see if she'd like to come cater the small ceremony. You'd gone with an empire cut gown to make it easier on your changing body, the skirt was just barely long enough to pass your ankles and you had every intention of going barefoot down the carpeted aisle.

Shoes had become the devil as of late.

"You'll be home almost right after, it's okay. We knew this was happening weeks ago."

"You are allowed to be selfish and demand I stay home."

"I know, Javi, but I want you to get things handled so you don't have to fly back sooner. You're almost done, soon the team and the director will have everything they need and you can just stay home, and you know that you have three people on that set who will call you the second anything isn't exactly to your specifications."

Javi had pulled Murch into multitudes of meetings with the script team, the costume team, and basically everything so that she knew exactly what it was he wanted. He wanted her on editing still, wanted her to do what she was best at, but trusted her to make sure that nobody changed his vision without at least running it by him first.

You hummed and began tabbing through Tumblr while Javi groaned softly, nodding at the logic of what you reminded him, and paused seeing the Valentines cards in your inbox. Your best friends online were amazing, you'd confessed to a handful of your most trusted exactly who you were and their reactions had been to squeal and scream and ask you about what Javi was like in bed before calling you "God's Favorite" and blasting you with memes from press shots of you and Javi.

Basically nothing had changed.

Now they just sent you Nic Cage memes to send to Javi.

You loved them so much and they'd all agreed to come to the wedding -with you paying for everything, no way in hell were you going to let them go broke for it- so you had been more than excited about the event to come.

"I have to go, my break is over, if you need me for anything please call me Solecita."

"Don't worry, I absolutely will call you if there's any issues."

Paolo was here with you, along with a small group of security guards that were all ex-military special forces, and so was Gabriella; basically there was nothing you could do that he wouldn't know about if anyone thought you'd be at risk.

"I love you, mi prometida."

"I love you, mi prometido."

As you ended the call your stomach grumbled, making you roll your eyes, and as you got up to raid the fridge you couldn't help but giggle and look down at your round belly.

"Let's wait until Papa comes home to tell him the surprise."

You didn't get an answer but you also hadn't expected one.

Valentines Day came with flowers delivered, as well as chocolate covered strawberries, and a spa day voucher that you could cash in on whenever you wanted. The chocolate was dark and rich but with your new food restrictions you had to be careful over how many you ate, though you did talk to your physicians first to make sure they wouldn't lose their minds over you indulging in a few treats, and you had done a lot more writing than you'd thought yourself capable of.

Editing was an entirely different beast, you had gotten a few paragraphs in and given up, now you were currently just scrolling through Tumblr and reading the plethora of new Valentines Day themed fanfictions that had cropped up on your dash. A soft chime and an ask notification had your cheeks aching from how wide you smiled, saving the Nic Cage Valentines with a shrill giggle and immediately sending them to Javi after you filled out the final one.

You half expected a text back with his favorite emoji, the good ol' rofl emoji, but instead you heard his boisterous laugh from downstairs.

"Javi?!"

"Surprise! I was able to hammer out the details early and come home."

(You would later learn that Dieter and Nic had banded together and outright refused to work, as they had their own Valentines plans they wanted to disappear for, while Murch strong-armed Javi into demanding to come home sooner.)

Tears of joy made your lower lip quiver and Javi's panicked squeak as he dropped the flowers onto your desk to cradle you in his arms only made you sniffle louder.

"Stupid pregnancy hormones, I'm happy, sorry I'm just-"

"No, not stupid anything. You are doing an amazing thing, Solecita, carrying our baby. You may cry, yell, pout, and do whatever you need to in order to express whatever it is you're feeling."

How you'd landed the literal perfect man you'd never know, God's Favorite indeed, and Javi's sweet grace over your constantly changing emotions had you swooning and crying all in one weird choked off sound. He pulled back enough to rest his hand on your belly, on the swell of skin that had become his favorite place to just rest his hand, and you wiped your face of tears as you carded your hand through his curls with your other hand.

"Javi?"

"Hmmm?"

He was just basking in being home, being close to you again, his touch gentle as he swayed with you to the music of your heartbeats and soft breaths.

"You like the name Iris still?"

His eyes shot to your face, maybe it was cruel to do the reveal standing up but you just couldn't wait. His eyes began to glisten and his hands covered his mouth as he let out the softest little sound of delight.

"We are having a girl?"

"Yes, you'll have a little princesa to have tea parties with."

"Mi reina y mi princesa, I am truly blessed."

He meant it, too, not one of those men who had to have the firstborn son or whatever archaic thing that was about; he truly, wholly, was happy to have a little girl to welcome to the world when the time came. His mystified expression as he dropped to his knees to just press his forehead to your abdomen, to whisper promises of whatever kind of toys and hobbies his little girl wanted, all of it made you fall even more in love with this man.

"Good, the wedding is in three days. I've already got your suit."

Javi's eyes shot up to yours before he laughed, grinning wide and kissing your bump.

"Do you hear that, my little Iris? Your mama is the one who runs this house."

"You're damn right I do."

"Then allow me to pay tribute to mi reina, I have a lot of time away to make up for."

"Happy Valentines Day, Javi."

"Happy Valentines Day, Solecita."

It was absolutely a wonderful Valentines Day with Javi making you see stars with his mouth, making you drench the sheets with the skillful use of his fingers, and whispering praise as he told you how beautiful you were while he made you watch the way you took his cock in front of the mirror in the bedroom.

He was insatiable for the taste of you, the feel of your body against his, the sound of you crying his name into the room with each orgasm he pulled from you until you were leaking with him and shaking from a mix of hunger and exhaustion. Javi fed you small bites in bed, not bothering to clean you up yet as you leaked him on the sheets, and drew a bath for you while you showered only to end up pressing your back into the tile and soak the floor of the shower.

You didn't remember falling asleep in the rub as he rubbed your shoulders and hands, as he whispered promises of taking care of you and Iris, but you did remember him getting you up and drying you off and tucking you into bed after changing out the sheets. You woke up to him curled around you with an arm held protectively over your lower belly and his smile against your shoulder.

[undiscovered-horizon]

A street magic trick - 11th Doctor (Doctor Who)

The Doctor seemed excited about street magic tricks.

”They’re not real magic, hardly any human can use it” he explained to Clara as if she didn’t already know.

”Optical illusions, a trick played on the mind of silly, little humans”

His excitement lied in this sentence. The easiness with which humankind could be tricked was of utmost amusement to him.

”Oi” Clara warned him. ”What do you mean hardly any human can use magic? It’s not real, is it?”

”Well, yes” he answered. ”And no” added quickly. ”Not in the way humans imagine. There’s no stick-waving and reciting spells, or turning someone into a frog”

”Then what is it?”

”Difficult to explain,” he said and saw the frustration on Clara’s face. ”I don’t know how it works and I don’t like admitting I don’t know something”

”And your card, ma’am, should be in this gentleman's pocket” someone spoke ahead of them.

It was a young man with steel eyes, a pointy nose, and weirdly high cheekbones. He had long hair slicked backward, showing off the receding hairline. He had a dashing, pearly smile but something about his expression was eerie.

The Doctor noticed that the street audience awaited his reaction. Without breaking the eye contact, he reached into his jacket’s left side and pulled out, what looked to be, a rare edition of tarot cards. This card presented a raven with burning sapphire eyes and equally bizarre markings on its body. The bird had a golden crown on its head and a pile of pearls and coins around its feet. The text below read The Trickster.

”Very appropriate card” Doctor spoke quietly still looking at the item he just found.

A raven. A crown.

Somehow, the coexistance of those two elements seemed familiar to him. Like a memory he kept away, a vision so deeply ingrained into his subconscious mind he didn’t have to remember it. As if he was hardwired to know it, a story so ancient its words were carried in his blood.

A weird, unfamiliar feeling in his chest.

”Brilliant” he handed the card to the lady who happened to be the victim of the street magician. ”Where did you learn that?” He asked the man.

”I’m afraid the wizard cannot reveal his secrets” his voice was hoarse.

”I’m sure he could point in their direction. It’s not real magic, after all”

”And how could you know, good sir? The world is full of wonders” the man smiled mysteriously. ”But I can point towards my secrets. It is up to you, however, to see them”

The man pulled out a deck of cards. All of them had the same symbol on their back: a snake wrapped around a lotus flower with its tail clutching a dagger.

”The Avalonian Arcanes” Doctor said. ”An exceptionally rare find in London”

”Indeed” the man answered. He squinted at the Doctor, his expression suggesting he was in deep thought. "You should read Of  princes and thieves if you want to know more”

[prescription-ten]

Touch Starved - Hwang Hyunjin

[ I don’t own the GIF]

Title:  Touch Starved

Pairing: Hwang Hyunjin x Fem reader

Word Count: 2.3K

Genre: fluff, soulmate AU

Warnings:  no warnings, this was written last minute though, sorry if i missed anything in editing. mentions of hearing and sight impaired people. otherwise enjoy. 

Tag:  @vitaminhyunjin​ i hope you like this

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Last night I dreamt I was with him again. I am still not sure what he looks like, but I can feel the warmth of the sun, and the morning dew that has settled on the grass soak into my clothes. But most importantly, I can feel his head on my lap, his hand over my knee and I can feel his hair between my fingers.

I can make out the shape of his body in my head, along with the sound of his breath as if his mouth rests against my collarbone, or perhaps the side of my jaw. Either way, the feeling of his spirit kindles with mine and it blooms and even though I cannot see colour yet, I know that together we would create a beautiful symphony of sound and colour.

So, when I wake, and I feel my hands under my pillow and the sheets wrapped around my legs, I can’t help but feel as if my side is now cold, as if he truly was here with me. I stretch my limbs, arching my spine and spreading my toes and fingers until I hear a resounding crack before slowly sitting up.

The rest of the morning would go by uneventfully, my coffee was per usual, shower – short and sweet. By the time I was ready, it was almost eleven am so I began heading to a café around the block which had become one of my favourite spots since moving to a new city, a new country in fact. I had moved from my home country all the way to Seoul, South Korea for an incredible job opportunity. For years, I studied sign language and teaching and wanted to go into work with deaf children, teens, and adults, and I had done just that.

I loved my job, I loved the kids I worked with and I loved seeing the shine in their eyes as they learn new signs, as some of them get their first sets of hearing aids, or as some graduate from my classes. It brings along an amazing feeling, knowing that I have made an impact and helped in some way.

For some of the older ones, I had become friends with and still speak to them to this day. Many of them had told me about their job opportunities, families, and soulmates.

As a society, we have monetised a life well-lived by the discovery of our soulmates. Each of us have one, some find them early in life, and some much later, but we always find them. Today, I turn twenty-two. Every one of my friends and family had found their soulmates by twenty, so it’s a little easy to say that I have waited longer than most people I’ve ever known. The latest discovery I had heard of was from one of my students, who had told me their sibling had not found their soulmate until they turned thirty-one. All of us would stay colour-blind until we found our soulmate and when our soulmate died, we would be left in a world colour-blind excluding our soulmates favourite colour. Quite morbid in all honesty.

I dearly hope I do not have for him as long as their sibling had to wait.

The coffee shop was more quiet than usual and some bleak light shone through the windows, illuminating almost all of the booths and half of the tables scattered throughout the room. I approached the counter and purchased an americano and a ham and cheese croissant. I almost stayed inside the café but after glancing around at the empty space, I decided to walk to the park, finding a bench mostly untouched by sunlight. I stayed there for numerous hours before heading home.  

Hours went by before my head hit the pillow again and I hoped dearly I would b able to visit him again.

But I did not get to meet him for another week, each time my head hit the pillow, I dreamt of nothing and woke up more restless than the previous night. After a week, coffee had become the one thing helping me throughout the day as I struggled to stay focused or awake no matter how much I slept. After the seventh day, I began to feel the fatigue even more-so than usual, and religiously headed to the café around the corner from my apartment. Luckily there wasn’t a line up and the staff recognised me and put through my usual and feeling dizzy, I sat down in a booth, I didn’t want to risk heading to the park and risk fainting where I might not be found for a long period of time.

My brain was feeling a little frazzled, my eyesight felt off and I could not understand why, but as I sat there trying to process everything happening and focus, I noticed that my eyesight was clearing up, some colours coming through so briefly I barely noticed. I began to stare at the menu, watching the muted greys and blacks turn into colours I hadn’t been able to see before. He was so close to me. I looked up; my eyes wide as the colours grew bolder. He must be so close, just out of reach. I sat on the edge of my seat, feeling some sweat appear near my lower back, I hope I don’t smell bad. I must look terrible; I wasn’t prepared to meet him yet when I looked like a casual disaster.

I became very aware of the bags under my eyes, of the hoodie that I wore which was neither a name brand nor that flattering in all honesty. But the colours didn’t feign at all yet. Surely if the universe decided that this was the time, a silly hoodie wouldn’t ruin it.

I heard the chime of the little bell at the front of the café and my head swung around to face it. The instant my eyes locked with his face, I felt my vision go blurry before clearing again and suddenly I could see him in full colour. In came a young man with dark hair that looked like it sat below his chin, it was nicely tied back with some framing his face. He was wearing jeans and a hoodie as well and I decided that it was my favourite colour on him, even if I didn’t know what colour it was. In hand he carried a cane which was tethered to his wrist and it was then with shock that I realised he must have been blind or sight impaired.

“Hi Hyunjin!” The male staff member called from the counter, “Would you like an americano again?”

Hyunjin smiled, cautiously heading for the counter, “Yes please, Max. How have things been this week?”

“They’ve been alright, it’s been a bit slow recently but all of our regulars are still coming in which keeps us busy still.”

“That’s good to hear, do you mind walking me to that booth I like?” He was so polite.

“Yeah, I can do that for you, I’ve also charged the drink through your loyalty card, this one is free.”

“Thank you, Max,”

“It’s seriously no problem, you know you’re one of our favourites so we will always treat you well.”

I watched as Max walked Hyunjin to the booth two down from my own, and Max seemed to notice my gaze locked to Hyunjin and he stopped by my booth on the way past, “Is everything alright, miss?”

“That… That young man, does he come in very often?”

“Yes, miss… Why do you ask?” Max seemed very confused.

“I’ve just never seen him in here before… but seeing him today brought colour into my life… Do you think he would mind if I approached him?” I couldn’t help but stammer a little, trying to explain my strange behaviour.

Max’s eyes seemed to pop out of his skull, “Wait, miss really? Well! Of course! He wouldn’t mind at all! You should definitely go and introduce yourself.”

I nodded, my vision going back to Hyunjin who currently had his eyes closed and face towards the sunlight. I stood from the booth as Max hurried back to his station and I felt the nerves kick in two-fold as I took a deep breath.

I made my way to his table, I gulped and finally spoke, “Uh… Hello? My name is Y/N, would you mind if I sat with you?”

He turned to face me, his gaze went straight through me and it gave me chills, “Oh hello! I’m Hyunjin and of course, go ahead.”

He did seem a little confused by my strange offer so I spoke up, “I’m sorry to come out of nowhere I just… Well I was sitting a couple of booths down and I saw you walk in and…” I felt so tongue tied.

Hyunjin smiled sweetly, “It’s alright, take your time, love.”

My heart fluttered, “Well, I saw you walk in and I’ve been feeling fatigued all week and today I was going through something I’ve never gone through before, and when you walked in and I saw you, I saw colour for the first time in my life.”

Hyunjin sat there quietly for a few moments before he spoke up. “You’re being truthful?”

I was a little shocked by the question, “I--… Yes. I am.”

He smiled again, “Well, I’m almost completely blind, but I can see light when it’s bright enough. I’ve dreamt of my soulmate for many years, trying to remember the sensation and the feel of them… May I touch you?”

I stayed quiet, looking at his beautiful smile, “Yes.”

He slid his hands across the table, and I met him halfway. His fingertips were incredibly warm in my palms, I heard his quick intake of breath and prayed it was a good sign. His hands moved very slowly in my own as he felt each crevice, he touched my fingernails and followed all of their ridges before moving over my knuckles; from there his hands wrapped around my wrist, his hands were big enough that his fingers easily touched each other. He moved up my forearms, he was now leaning over the booth table, trying to get further.

“Would this be easier if I came closer?” I asked, hesitant.

He paused, “… If you’re comfortable, that would be helpful.”

He started to pull away, but I held onto one of his hands and gently held it as I stood and moved around the table, I watched some red flush cover his cheeks and he slid over so there was more room next to him.

Once I had sat down, I picked up his other hand and after a moment he moved his hands back to my forearms and continued the journey up. His hands moved over my shoulders and collarbones until his fingertips brushed the base of my throat. His fingers delicately moved up and he touched the lobes of my ears, followed my jawline before once again heading upwards where he lingered over my lips, the tip of my nose and I closed my eyes as he brushed his thumb pads over my eyelids and eyebrows.

He pulled away, and seemed to think for a moment before speaking again, “May I… This is going to seem strange, but can I hug you?”

I was unsure but I agreed, “Of course,” I leaned in, touching him softly so I didn’t shock him. I slid my arms underneath his and wrapped them around his waist, locking my fingers together gently before leaning in even closer. I laid my head on his shoulder, with my face pointing away from his neck. Hyunjin still seemed a little surprised but he was quick to hug me back, pressing the side of his face onto the top of my head with his arms wrapping around my shoulders.

I felt tears begin to surface as I hugged him. He was so warm and everything about him seemed to feel so right, I felt his chest stutter a little before he pulled me in closer, “I’ve been waiting a long time for you, Y/N.”

I chuckled and squeezed him tighter before pulling away, he was hesitant to let me go but he had the biggest smile on his face and I felt like the luckiest person in the world to have been fated to him.

Months passed and soon Hyunjin was fully moved into my apartment. Our families were extremely happy for us and I found that Hyunjin had a very large group of extremely supportive friends that were almost as lovely as he was. I ended up fitting in quite well with the boys, one of which was actually a sibling to one of my current students who – by the way – had been enthralled when I had told them all I had finally met my soulmate, and they were even more intrigued upon finding out that he was in fact blind.

But, sitting here on the couch with Hyunjin’s head in my lap and with his hand resting on my knee, I couldn’t stop myself from entangling my fingers in his soft hair and began to smile at myself. Sitting here, I know there wasn’t anything in the world I would want to change, except maybe, I would have stayed and sat inside that café just a little earlier on in life. I would have sat in daily if I had known that little cafe would bring me Hyunjin, my love. Hyunjin, you leave me wanting more from life than anyone ever has, you leave me touch starved, and I wouldn’t want it any other way.

“Hyunjin… I love you.”

He twisted around so he faced me, “I love you more, though.”

[royallyprincesslilly]

Title: Rumor Has It {11}

Chris Evans x Famous Reader Uriah “Riah” Tyler-Evans

Warning: Plot, Cursing, Angst, Slight embellishment of actual real-world media

Word Count: 3.2K

Summary: You and Chris have been married for four years after a whirlwind romance. You are both happy and trying to navigate marriage in the public eye while balancing your successful careers. In the entertainment industry, not everything is as it seems, the flash of a camera lens impairs vision. As scandal and flashing lights put a strain on your once fairytale marriage is it possible your Hollywood marriage can stand the test of the rumor mill?

**Inspired by a video seen of Chris and his co-star Ana De Armas on their press tour for Knives Out at TIFF where she kept touching his chest and face standing about five inches apart.

**NOTE: A WORK OF FICTION. NOT CREATED TO GARNER HATE OF ANY SORT.

**Loosley Edited/Proofread**

**Interactive**

Thank you guys for reading!!!! If you enjoyed this please LIKE, COMMENT, REBLOG. 😊 ❤❤

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

 You were reeling. You didn’t know if you were more furious or hurt. After everything, after the last few weeks, therapy, the revelations, the openness between you, your tears, and struggle this was where you were. Lost. Confused.

 After sitting in your office or almost an hour after the end of your FaceTime call with Chris examining the screen record of Chris’ background and the one from Ana’s picture you’d gone through every single scenario. You’d even branched out to scenarios of those scenarios and at the end of it all you’d settled on was something wasn’t right. Everything pointed to your husband being a liar, your husband playing both angles when in fact he as a low-down dirty asshole. You were reluctant to believe it especially with all you’d been through together in therapy. The emotions he’d expressed couldn’t have been faked. Only an actual sociopathic psychopath could have faked it. that possibility had you wondering if your husband was a sociopathic psychopath.

 This new light on the situation didn’t help you keep focus for the day. Concentration was pointless, working was pointless. Every couple of minutes you were thinking about it again. wondering where they were right now if they were together if they were laughing together about how easy it all had been. Needless to say, you were now looking at “platonic” actions in a whole new light. You now looked at the video of them together at TIFF differently, you looked at the interviews they did together and the body language differently. You even looked at the times they’d been together when you called him while he was filming. Your insecurities were at an all-time high.

 Those insecurities are what had you on a private jet bound for San Diego, two days before your scheduled trip to LA that was supposed to have you meet up with Chris. You’d followed your gut, insecurities, and fears here because you had a feeling something was up, and you refused to sit around and ignore it any longer. You’d played the dutiful wife, the wife who played the trust card. You’d played the faithful and devoted wife who did everything in her power to save and strengthen her marriage. It was time to play a different card, the stealth wife. You were going to get to the bottom of this one way or another.

“Hello?”

 “I hope you’re not just going to roll over on this one.” Your mother’s voice resonated and you sighed out in the backseat of the chauffeured truck.

 “Mama, for goodness sake,” you began before she cut you off.

 “What would be for goodness’s sake is you putting both of them in their place, especially her. A man can be as faithful as Jesus but there will always be snakes and Jezebels slithering through the garden of Eden.”

 You rolled your eyes. You didn’t have the time or patience to listen to her scripture riddles. “Mama, I don’t have time for this.”

 “Do you have time for a divorce?” You almost fell out. She had the uncanny ability to take it from zero to two hundred in two seconds. This was not different. Still, she had a point.

 “I will take care of it. I’m in San Diego now and I’m going to confront Chris.”

 “Take a beat, I say confront her first.”

 “What?”

 “Yes, both parties are equally complicit but sit with her, get a feel for her. You’ll be able to tell her intentions within the first two minutes. I’m not saying go and beat her ass off the bat. It’s what I would do, but there are ways to be tactful in a situation like this,” she suggested.

 You had thought to go to her and rip out her hair then give her a nice souvenir in the form of a face scar to be used as a reminder to stay away from your husband. You’d also thought to play devil’s advocate and go behind enemy lines and assess the situation from her side. You’d left both options open and decided to go to the horse first. Hearing your mother’s thoughts, you decided to go with her plan. You’d go see the snake, Jezebel, first.

 ~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Almost an hour later, you were sitting in a hotel room in front of a set table with an assortment of foods before you.  Your mind was racing but you felt strangely calm as if you were slowly gliding through the air in zero gravity. It would have been peaceful, but your heart felt heavy.

 “Uriah?” Her accent was very clear. You also heard her shock and confusion. When you turned to her she had a smile on her face. She was a pretty woman. There was no lying about it. You could see why men would fall for her and her big hazel eyes, striking bone structure, plump bottom lip, and exotic accent. Thinking about that you saw what would draw him in.

 You smiled widely and stood. “Ana. How are you?” She returned your smile and stepped to you with her arms out. Once before you, she threw her arms around you hugging you. It was unexpected and your first red flag.

 “I’m so good. How are you? Oh my goodness I love this outfit you look amazing.” She was being overly friendly. This was a sign she was overcompensating for something. You played her game and carried in with small talk.

 After a few minutes, the two of you sat down across from each other. “Chris didn’t mention you were here.”

 “I know. He doesn’t know. I wanted it to be a surprise. So please don’t tell him.”

 “Oh, that’s so sweet—so romantic.” Her smile slipped for a moment. You didn’t miss it. She smiled again and straightened her back coming back to being the picture of friendliness.

 “I wanted to have a bit of lunch together just us girls. It’s been such a long time since we chatted. I just wanted to catch up.” You knew it was believable. You were not an amateur actress.

 “That sounds nice.”

 “I remember a few things Chris mentioned that you liked. Cucumber sandwiches, dragon rolls, and that salsa from your country that you said you couldn’t live without. I hope it’s the right brand.”

 Ana’s eyes roamed over the food on the table with a huge smile on her face. “Wow, he told you about all this?”

 You nodded and sipped your tea, “He did. He talks about you a lot. I can see he likes you.” Ana looked at you and studied you as if she were searching for something. You suspected what she was searching for. You kept your cool.

 “Yeah, we’re good friends. He’s a great man. You married a keeper.” You slowly nodded and took up one of the California Rolls before you. It was one of the two sushi products you would touch. From your example, Ana did the same and made a plate with a little of everything.

 The two of you ate in silence for a few minutes. After some quiet, you chatted about the business, upcoming projects, silly stories floating around Hollywood, fashion, makeup, and travel. It all seemed normal. If you didn’t have the fact in the back of your mind that she was fucking your husband then it was possible to become friends. In another life, the two of you may have become friends. You may have been good friends.

 As you spoke about trivial things, you formulated the right path to go. You couldn’t be too direct, and you couldn’t be too passive. You had to find a way to ride the line between the two.

 “I hope everything is okay with your family. I heard the break Chris took was because of a family emergency,” Ana led a little over an hour into brunch.

 “Yes, it was. We went through some things that had the power to break us. It was important we took the time. I wasn’t sure we still felt the same way about each other anymore.” It was true. Sometimes you had to reveal something personal to open the gates. Ana’s hand reached out for yours and rested on top in a reassuring way.

 “I’m sorry. I had no idea. Do you want to talk about it?”

 “No, no need. I want to distract myself. How are things with you? Anyone in your life that makes this crazy life of fame better?”

 She remained quiet for a little while then toyed with the straw in her Fiji water bottle. Her eyes didn’t go back to yours though. “Things are okay. They could definitely be better. I never realized how much fame could be so lonely. You have millions of people watching you all the time. Tens of them around you but still you can feel--.”

 “Alone?”

 Ana looked to you and nodded with a melancholic smile. “Yeah. I don’t expect you to understand. You have Chris.”

 “He’s been pulling away for some time. It may just be our workload and our maybe we’re not the same people anymore. We might have outgrown each other. I understand.” It was a stretch but in the light of new details maybe it wasn’t. Ana watched you and you tapped into your actress side and played up everything you felt a little over two months ago.

 “Oh Uriah, I’m sorry. Do you think--.” Ana paused looked down timidly then bit her bottom lip before she spoke again. “Do you think he’s having an affair?”

 Bingo, you thought. Nothing you’d said since this brunch began had any path to eluding about an affair. The fact that she brought it up was suspicious. “Do you think he is? You’re with him a lot more than I am these days.”

Ana looked at you. you felt the air in the room change, her eyes got slightly darker. “How would I know that?”

 You shrugged and took up a beignet. You loved that the powdered sugar just melted in your mouth.

 “Wait, are you insinuating I’m having an affair with Chris?”

 “I never said that Ana. Why would I even say that?”

 Ana straightened her sitting position and held her head higher. You knew what was coming and you loathed it. Either you’d slipped somewhere, or she was seriously on edge about the topic.

 “Oh, I see. You asked me here under false pretenses to play nice and sugar me up hoping to get me to spill something. You told me some sad story about your marriage hoping it would give you the optic of the sad victim so I could feel sorry for you. Wow. These questions weren’t you being a friend or a decent person. You were trying to find out of I’m having an affair with Chris. I can’t believe this!” She sprang to her feet and walked away from the table.

 “You’re overreacting, Ana. I never accused you of anything. All I wanted to do was catch up with you.”

 “Bullshit!” She rolled her eyes, turned her back to you then looked at you again.

 “By you coming to me like this it shows how scared you are. Do you feel threatened by me, Uriah? Worried that Chris likes me more than you? Scared that our connection is better than yours?” She was trying to get to you, you could tell. You refused to play this game.

 “Look, Ana, I’m not here to play games with you.”

 “No, you’re here to see how much of a threat I am for your marriage. What you should be thinking about is do you actually have a marriage still?” She didn’t give you a chance to reply before she walked out the door slamming it behind her.

 “This bitch!” She just moved her next chess piece—the knight.

 ~~~~~~~~

When you got to Chris’ room that evening you were even angrier than you were at brunch with Ana. You should have thrown her out the fucking window instead of playing nice with her. Yes, a tactical approach was the best but a show of dominance and violence was always a good move. You hadn’t made one misstep. You didn’t take the con too far, you weren’t too passive or direct. She had always been on edge. She probably was suspicious from the moment she walked in. You knew better than anyone a guilty conscience would always see a threat even where there was none. You were a threat though. You knew now she wasn’t as innocent as she pretended to be. That made you wonder just what the fuck was going on.

 According to Chris’ assistant, he was busy doing some last-minute interviews and events for Knives Out. You took advantage of the quiet and time alone by thoroughly scanning his room, especially where the backgrounds of his facetime call and her image looked identical. There was no mistaking it in person. They were the same. After you roamed around the room wondering just what the walls would say if they could talk. Would they tell you all their sorted secrets about your husband and a particularly hazel-eyed co-star? Would they speak of his fidelity and boringness or would they speak about his betrayal?

 When you’d thought yourself weary, you moved on to ways to relax which included taking a long bath and feasting on room service. It was a good distraction but that was all it was—a distraction. One that you knew would end as soon as Chris got back. You would have to address the literal elephant in the room the picture.

 You were so distracted by the view from the living room window and your tumultuous thoughts and feelings that you almost didn’t hear when the door opened, and Chris walked in.

 “Uriah.” You looked to see him standing there dressed in perfect business casual wear with his hair perfectly tousled. You would never think he was unattractive. For a few moments, his eyes left your face and roamed over your robe-clad body and down your exposed leg. As he scanned you, he walked more into the room.

 “Hi.”

“You’re not supposed to be here in San Diego. I thought we were meeting in LA.

 “I know, I just—wanted to be here.”

 Chris sighed and sat in a seat across from you. you found it a little strange that he hadn’t seen you in a week and he hadn’t come over to greet you or initiate contact. As you were going to bring it up, Chris began speaking again.

 “Checking up on me?” His words rubbed you the wrong way. Turning around to face him you crossed your legs not caring that they were fully exposed.

 “Should I be checking on you? I wasn’t aware you needed checking up on.”

 He kept eye contact with you. You could see the tight clench in his jaw and the straight line of his lips. He was annoyed.

 “Did you lure Ana to lunch and accuse her of having an affair with me?”

 Closing your eyes, you sighed and cracked your neck. You’d just jumped out of the frying pan and into the fire. The bitch had tattled and moved her second chess piece at the same time.

 “Don’t lie to me Uriah,” Chris warned through tightly clenched jaws.

 “I did not accuse her of anything.”

 “So, you did lure her to lunch and treated her like a homewrecker and threatened my career and name in the industry?”

 “Are you kidding me, Chris?”

 “Are you kidding me, Uriah?!” He sprang to his feet like a firework shell shooting into the air. You could feel the anger coming off of him.

 “I cannot believe you would do this! Why would you do this?”

 “Me? Why would I do this? Why would you do this?”

 “What are you talking about? What have I done Uriah?” You got off the couch and made your way to your purse for your phone. If he wanted to play the fool you would enlighten him. once you found the picture you shoved it in his face.

 “What the fuck is that?” You watched him as he scanned the post then rolled his eyes.

 “It’s a post.”

 “No shit it’s a post. Did you send her that sweater?”

 “So what? I wasn’t going to wear it, she liked it so I gave it away.”

 “And this?” You pointed to the background of the picture and then went to the still of his facetime call.

 “What about this? Why does your background which is here, identically match hers?”

 Chris looked at you like you were bat shit crazy as if he had no idea who you were.

 “Don’t look at me like I’m crazy. What the fuck is this?”

 He didn’t speak, he just stared at you.

 “I’ve suppressed the urge to ask the question because of everything we’ve been through these last months but come on Chris. I can only be so complacent.”

 “Ask the question, Uriah. I dare you.” It was another warning. You flared your nose and hesitated. You knew if you asked it you’d be right back where you were before therapy. The hurt on his face was evident. He looked as if he were holding back tears.

 “Ask it!”

 “Why do your backgrounds match?”

 “They are hotel rooms, I’m sure they are all identical.”

 “Bullshit!” You walked away from him and to the window.

“Did you come here to confront her--to confront me?” You clenched your jaw and fought back your tears.

 “I wanted to see where your head was and the opportunity arose to see where hers was too,” you explained.

 “Satisfied? Was her denial enough?”

 “She didn’t deny anything. She threw her cockiness around instead. Did she tell you that when she came running to you to get sympathy and create an even bigger wedge between us?”

 “This isn’t about her Uriah. This is about you. I thought you trusted me. I thought we’d moved past this and had turned a page and were moving forward. I thought we were stronger.”

 “I thought so too. I really tried not to come here with this. I debated it but Chris how can I look past this? If you were me, what would you have done?”

 “I wouldn’t come here accusing you or your costar or fucking!”

 “For the first half of our marriage you accused me of fucking Christiano! I just need you to explain this to me.”

 “I have nothing to explain. This wasn’t my room. She wasn’t here.”

 “So, she wasn’t in here dressed like that with you? You weren’t fucking her before this was taken?”

 He didn’t speak right away. He looked disappointed. He sighed and walked away facing his back to you.

 “I don’t think we’ll ever get past this.  The last two months were a waste of time. I thought we could move forward and be stronger because of the pain and the struggle but I don’t think we can.” He turned back to you in time for you to see a tear roll down his cheek.

 “I never lied to you. I’m not playing you either. That picture was not taken here. She’s never been in here.” He dropped his head and wiped his tears away. “I don’t think I should be here either.”

 He didn’t give you enough time to speak, he just walked out the door leaving you alone. You didn’t know what to think or believe at this point. You knew you weren’t crazy. You also knew that this bitch had shown her full hand. 

~~~~~~~~~

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[iminyourhandskara]

Chris Wood on FatMan Beyond with Kevin Smith and Marc Bernardin. (Full interview transcript)

A MASSIVE, MASSIVE THANK YOU TO @bwaybenoist WHO HELPED ME A LOT WITH THIS. ❤❤❤❤

to the anon who requested this, and for whoever wants to read this, enjoy!

__________________

Kevin: One of my favorite people in the world, man. If you're lucky enough, you get to work with people you like, and I met this kid on a set and most people on sets, you know, 'not necessarily all likable and stuff like that.

Marc: Careful.

Kevin: Yeah. (indistinct) This kid ain't just likable, he's fucking lovable, man. I was like, goddamn it, I fell in love with him the way I fell in love with Ben Affleck, where I'm like "You should be in everything! Fuckin, you should play Fletch." I still to this day think he'd be the perfect Fletch based on the Gregory McDonald books. When we got lucky enough to work on Masters of the Universe from Mattel on Netflix, I, you know, there was always a like "We could probably get a big cast for this" and stuff, so I played very few cards in terms of like "Well, here's who I think you could get and stuff like that" because Netflix, Mattel, these cats putting up the money, they should tell us who they want and stuff and Teddy who's our Netflix exec, he loves MOTU, so like casting of course with Netflix, the ability to draw talent is gonna be right up his alley. But one of the only names I put forward in the process..I was like “I worked with Chris Wood, and he is SO good, like he would be an excellent Prince Adam and He-Man as well of course, but like, can I put him on the list?” and they put him on the list, and you know, I thought that was gonna be it, “Kevin made a suggestion and we’ll put him in there and then it will never happen.” And he got the job, legit got the job. Mattel loved him, Netflix loved him, boom, he’s our prince Adam! So, here tonight, you got him? Here tonight, man..*Skype sound* Making a little chit-chat, that’s the sound of joy. That means we’re gonna talk to a guest, we get to open the door and welcome to Fatman Beyond, uh, He-Man himself, ladies and gentleman, Prince Adam, I give you..Chris Wood.

Chris: Oh my goodness.

Marc: Look at that intro.

Kevin: And look at that pretty ass man, look at how pretty he is.

Chris: *Plays Jellicle Cats from CATS*

Kevin: Somebody’s been listening to the show!

Chris: Reminiscing about..the Winter Garden Theater.

Kevin: This is actually..I was gonna say..

Chris: My first Broadway show I ever saw, Kevin!

K: Was CATS?

C: Was CATS!

K: I totally forgot as we were sitting here, going “Nobody’s gonna care about us talking about Broadway.” There’s one guy waiting to be on the show who was like “I’d love it if it was all--”

C: I was having the time of my life! This was like Batman, Broadway edition, I loved it.

K: Give us the full rundown of every Broadway show that you’ve ever seen, and when you say Broadway, do you mean--

C: I mean, I mean Broadway.

K: You mean like seeing it on Broadway, not just live theater.

C: No man, that’s where I got my start, that was my whole...the stage was my whole thing. You’d have to sit here for like three hours to hear all of the shows I ever saw..

K: Are you serious? So wait you-

C: It’s got a soft place in my heart still.

K: You uhm, I remember when I was working on Supergirl, at one point Melissa was just like: “He was in Sweeney Todd!” and I was like “What?” Were you in Sweeney Todd?

C: It’s true, yeah.

M: With Victor Garber?

C: Yeah.

K: Yeah, it’s surprising, he was in Sweeney Todd and has worked on a Victor Garber adjacent show.

C: Yeah.

K: I (was) saying before Ben Affleck’s my last card, I’m turning to Chris Wood to make that Victor Garber connection.

C: Yeeees! Hey guys!

M: Hey man!

K: How are you sir?

C: What’s going on?

K: So wait, what- you were a musical theater guy.Correct?

C: That (was) my thing, man. All through college and high school and growing up, that was like-- aside from making movies on my Super8-- that was my, that was my other hobby.

K: What is uh- look, for those who don’t follow very closely: Chris has acted for a long time, I met him playing Mon-El when I was directing Supergirl episodes. Of course as I said, he’s playing our He-Man. What was the vampire show that Mewes loves that you were on?

C: The Vampire Diaries, yeah, yeah.

K: The Vampire Diaries as well and stuff, uhm, and he’s a wonderful actor and gorgeous human being but-

C: You’re always- you have the kindest intros in the world, Kevin. You’re- I come on just blushing every time I talk to you. 

K: He’s wonderful (but) this is wanna lay out there: he is a fucking hell of a writer.

M: Outstanding. 

C: Oh wow! It’s still going!

K: And you know that like I’m not just saying it’s a butter him up because we could totally just talk about He-Man and that’s it but like-- I’ve read a script that he wrote that took me back to 1994, where I was like-- This is what I felt like when I saw Indie Film. It reignited a love for indie film because the film was impressionistic and wonderful and original and singular in vision and stuff..

C: And nobody will ever make it..*Laughs* All of the qualities of a terrific independent film.

K: You got- you got some pushback on the movie. “Some people like this? What?” but he wrote- didn’t you write a script that went someplace legit or whatnot? Are you allowed to talk about it?

C: I did, yeah. It’s not public yet, but we’re--

K: That’s not public? That wasn’t in the trades or anything like that?

C: Not yet, man. It’s still like..under the table wheeling and dealing.

K: Alright, we can’t say what it is, but I can tell you right now, it’s like- it’s something that you and I (Marc) would work our Whole lives to achieve and we’ve been doing- all we have is writing. And this motherfucker has everything in life and he’s about to have that as well. But well worth it, because he’s wonderful at the written word. What do you attribute that to?

C: The written word?

K: Yeah. Where’d you- How come you’re such a good writer?

C: Well, that’s very- Thank you first of all. Uhm, writing, I always kinda did it. I think I was like you, Kev, when I was a kid I just- no one was giving me pages to shoot or to have my friends put on plays in the garage, so I had to write my own words. So, I kind of always done it. I remember writing plays and I’d write up thirty pages of a script when I was 13 years old and I’d hand it out to my cousins and we’d perform it for all of our aunts and uncles and grandparents. I kind of always done it, just never been paid for it.

K: Yeah, that’s the dream, to get paid for it at the same time. I saw when my man got married, he whipped out beautiful words as well. Like you know, where you get to like say something to your-

M: Your vows.

K: There you go. That’s that word, “vows”

C: “What do we call those *snaps fingers* those promises we make.

K: I smoked those away. *Laughs* Even his vows, were like beautiful, like incredibly well fuckin written, beautiful choice of words, look-

C: My missus..

K: I mean, yes.

C: (Blew me out) the water.

K: Who went first, was it you or her who went first?

C: She went first, that’s why I couldn’ t-- I couldn’t speak through mine.

K: Yeah, both of them got real beautiful.

C: Oh man..

K: The thing is, I knew Woody was a writer because I read his script and what not. Didn’t homegirl open with “I’m not a writer” and then dropped one of the most beautiful fucking speeches that you’ve ever heard in your life? It was really great, really special for me to be there for, man. The point is this kid here writes well, the point is one day he’s gonna take my advice and write himself his own fucking lead in the movie that he should make, particularly that one that I love and make a movie, ‘cause he’s got all the ingredients. Like you know, like me I was like “I wanna make a movie” but like I had to hire actors and shit like that. Well, not hire but beg them to be in it. Thank God they were. But like he could write himself a part and be that fucking part and direct himself in the part, because he’s been on enough sets so knows how the process works.

M: So what you’re saying is he’s unfair.

K: Yes, I don’t want to say it in front of him and embarrass the man but yeah.

C: I’m so sorry.

K: Um, take us into, for those watching at home uh, talk a little bit about Vampire Diaries. When did that, was that the first thing you did?

C: That was one of my early kind of like public roles, um, I had done some stuff before that, nothing really that caught on with a fan base. That was sort of the first thing I did where people got excited about a character I was doing, um and wanted more of them, so they wrote me more stuff, um, yeah that was, I guess, I started on that seven years ago? Eight years ago?

K: And what was the, did you leave? Did they kill you off gracefully? Did you leave because you were like “I don’t want to do this”.

C: Yeah, I was a bad guy, so with like all good villains in our favourite shows, they have to meet some sort of demise or just, you know go into a spin-off *Laughs*. It’s kind of either-or. Or they’re Skeletor and then they just exist forever as an equal force.

K: So after, how long were you done with that show before you went and did Supergirl?

C: So I did a couple of things after that, um, I did a mini-series and I was on a limited series called ‘Containment’ about a pandemic, much like what we’re living in now. A little too timely, I kind of don’t recommend it at the moment, but yeah I did that and then right after that ended, that’s when I went up to Vancouver.

K; So wait, and if I remember correctly, Containment, did Julie Plec do that? Didn’t she also…

C: Yeah, yeah, that was Julie Plec, who did Vampire Diaries. She kind of pulled me across, from that experience.

K: When you’re making it, are you like “silly fictional world this will never happen.”.

M: “I’ll never need to remember any of this.”.

C: You know what, I feel like in a way the show kind of prepared me for the quarantine because I read so much about the Spanish Flu and about outbreaks and what actually happened, so when this all started happening, I was like “guys no no no, this is real” you know like, when people who play lawyers think they’re lawyers? It was kind of one of those things, suddenly I thought I knew, I was like “send me in I’m ready guys”.

M: Was there any Containment swag that you got to keep like “oh they sent me all these masks, I got all of these masks!”

C: I wish! I think I have some uh, dog tags and that’s about it..

K: Alright so wait, did they come after you to come audition for Supergirl? How does that happen?

C: That was the first time in my career where I got offered something without reading for it. Which was kind of amazing. And I played hard to get for a second because I wasn’t sure if it was the right coloured spandex. I was always more of a Batman guy than a Superman and then eventually it clicked and apparently, there was some part of me that knew I was going to meet my future wife and the mother of my children. *laughs* So I guess it all worked out.

K: I mean, yeah, and aside from just getting to play a hero and stuff, it gave you the rest of your life.

C: The rest of my life, which is a pretty lucky thing to get from a job, usually the job doesn’t serve you that. So that was pretty fantastic.

K: And there are very few people who can walk away from the CW going “and that built the rest of my life”, you know what I’m saying?

C: *laughs* Well it does match, the network that matches my initials should promise me something like that. I think it’s somewhere in the rulebook, I don’t know where.

K: I just put that together.

M: Like the Wendy's girl walks into Wendy's and is like “I will take all of your hamburgers, I’m Wendy."

(all laugh)

K: When you, when they gave you the suit finally, which is something you know, for the run of the show was something you would look forward to and then finally they do give you the suit, looked tight. Was it as uncomfortable as it looked?

C: Oh yeah, they’re terrible. It’s the worst thing you’ll ever wear in your life. You know, it’s like a giant onesie. A onesie is known for comfort and relaxation and too many zippers. This is as few of zippers and you can have including no accessibility to use the restroom, and you really can’t move in them, it kind of squeezes your everything, if there’s a thing that can be squeezed by the spandex. So things are going like, your elbow is going up to your shoulder and you’re not really sure why. You know that you’re not controlling it. Uh, it’s an odd experience, but um, I’ll tell you what, those lunch breaks were always very, it was like a great release to unzip the spandex and just lay on the couch.*laughs*

K: Tell them what it’s like to be up on the harness thing man, when you have to do flying and shit, on the green screens.

C: The flying is fun, that’s one of the really, that’s when you feel like you’re on the trampoline in your backyard as a kid fighting the invisible villains. It’s literally the same thing, except someone is doing the jumping for you with a rope. But that’s when you get to play and feel like a kid. Those are my favourite, the big action sequences. They’re a bear to shoot because they take days to shoot two minutes, as you know. But when you’re actually doing the thing, it’s a great time.

K: How long before you think, because I know it ain’t happening now, how many years from now do you think it’ll be before you and Melissa are like “let’s watch the episodes and see if we can spot the chemistry, and see if I can see myself falling in love and blah blah blah.” Do you think you’ll ever get there?

C: You know, I think it’s probably all over every second of every frame *laughs*. You could probably just uh, start at the beginning and then the first second on-screen probably in some way, shape or form go “oh there it is, there’s the first bits of it”.

K: I believe that, Mr. Broadway.

C: Mr Broadway!!

K: Can I tell him [Marc] a quick Broadway story? I actually went to a Broadway show, where I got to sit next to Mr Chris Wood.

M: Did you now?

C: Oh man, yeah you did.

K: It’s beautiful. So we go see Beautiful, is the show, the Carole King musical.

C: It was also beautiful.

K: It was beautiful, branded and in my heart. The lead of the show that night is of particular interest to both me and Mr Wood, him a lot more. Melissa Benoist, "rhymes with moist", I learned that from Chris Wood.

M: That sounds awfully romantic.

C: He texts me late one evening..

K I used to say Ben-o-ist all the time, I don’t know why.

C: And then I shot you a text I was like “You know it’s Benoist like moist, like a chocolate, decadent chocolate cake”.

M: That was the most Christopher Walken thing I’ve ever heard: “It’s Benoist like moist”.

K: “And delicious like a chocolate cake”. We’re watching Beautiful and we’re watching Melissa open, this is the debut, the first opening night of the show, and Chris is there um, a bunch of people that love Melissa were there. Fucking Lynda Carter was there, Wonder Woman was there to watch Supergirl, how awesome is that? The curtain opens and it opens with Melissa, she’s up top like bang, singing, right at the top of the show and I’m sitting right next to Chris Wood who is crying. Crying those joyful tears of seeing his lady love’s dream come true. She always wanted, is that her first Broadway performance?

C: It was, first and last. *laughs*

K: *jokingly* She’s not going to do it again?

C: No, no, no, no, no I’m just kidding, no it was her first. Life long dream.

K: She was like, she’s like Chris, she’s a theatre kid. A couple of musical kids and stuff, drama kids.

C: You can say nerds, it’s okay.

K: Drama nerds, the idea of Broadway, that was the goal, it wasn’t like “one day I’m gonna be Supergirl”, that was the surprise and the delight where she met the love of her life and stuff, but the dream was Broadway and her dream came true and as you know, if the curtains open and Melissa was crying, of course, people forgive it because they’re like “Oh look at her dreams coming true” the fact he was bawling, I was like "oh my God, she’s got the right guy." All of the joy he felt for her joy, as she was concentrating on doing the very thing that she dreamed about doing, performing, so she can’t just stop the show and be like “can you fucking believe this?” which is how she feels inside, he’s expressing for her just by emotional, he was crying, it was one of the most beautiful things in the world.

C: I’m not ashamed of it.

K: No!

M: Nor should you be.

K: It was so fucking wonderful so supportive but he is a- point of the story, he is such a Broadway kid.

C: You could say I’m a Jellicle kid.

K: Somebody could explain that.

M: I too was sitting next to Chris Wood when he was crying, but it was in New Orleans, in a waiting room to shoot a scene for Reebot, and he's like "Listen, I gotta fly back to Vancouver and my flight is like twenty minutes from now and we haven't shot yet, and it's 4 AM and I'm a little bit daffy in the brain.

K: *Laughs* It's true.

C: Yeah, we were drinking- we were on coffee number four, at like 5 AM, and I looked at my watch and I went "Oh!! My flight's at 6:30." *Laughs*

M: "Anytime you're ready, Kev!"

C: But we got it done.

K: The boys were so sweet, they came out uhm- Chris and Jesse Rath came out and they're in Jay and Silent Bob Reboot during Chronicon, if you haven't seen it on Amazon Prime.

C: With the most extensive and detailed backstory that any limited amount of screentime has ever had in the history of film. There's a story in those eyes, if you look closely.

K: Oh my God, he's working. But he's sitting next to Mr. Marc Bernardin.

M: Yes.

K: Throughout the night, and it was- we ran up against- what time do we finally shoot you guys?

C: I don't even remember.

M: It must've been like 5:15 or something like that.

K: And then rush them to the airport so they could get on (a) plane and get back to Vancouver, correct?

C: That's right, I had to get back to work.

K: Such a special-

C: But it was such a blast, though. And thank you again for letting us come out and play. That was such a trip.

K: It just means that uh, one day your kids are gonna watch that movie and be like "They're both in this terrible movie? Who are Jay and Silent Bob? Was this before you guys met on Supergirl? Why would you be in a movie like this?"

C: *Laughs*

K: Let's talk He-Man. What-- Had you done voice work prior to He-Man?

C: So, when I was broke, living in New York, in between babysitting for three boys on the Upper West Side to make cash so I could support my acting aspirations, I bought a little USB microphone and I joined this- I can't even remember the name of the site. It was some like, some freelance voiceover site, where you join and you can record audio samples and submit auditions and that was the only voice work I had done. I would- I was making like 100 bucks here and there, doing a voiceover for a animated-- "Hey kids, don't run in the cafeteria!" Like a school PSA, or I did some military PSA teaching soldiers etiquette in the barracks and-- so strange. But that was all I had done.

K: Tell'em about how- what acting in front of a microphone is like, 'cause it is acting-

C: Oh yeah.

K: -And in some ways, it's way more acting than one can do on a camera, on a camera one can be subtle, you can't be subtle behind a microphone. You gotta communicate emotion just with the voice, tell 'em about it.

C: You know it's so funny, I actually would describe voice acting as incredibly physical work, whereas camera acting it's all- you know, it's what you're feeling, it's..they say it's through your eyes, which actually means they're seeing through your eyes, through your soul, right? If you're feeling something you'll see it. But for voice acting, we don't see anything, it's all voice, so you really have to take the feeling and elevate it, and sometimes it helps to physically express it, so people sweat in the booth and they, you know, they grit their teeth and they stomp into the ground, and really, you have to really dig in, to grab the emotion and kinda amplify it, otherwise *monotone voice* you're just kinda talking like you do on film and nothing's really happening, and no one cares. Which is sort of what American acting is a lot of the time, we kinda just try not to seem like we're interesting and care about anything. *Laughs*

K: Is that the secret to acting? Did you just let it-- Is that all acting or just CW acting? What kinda acting are we talking about?

C: I'm actually doing a master class series on early '20s acting and basically, the first lesson is to speak as monotone and enunciate as little as possible.

K: Fucking worked out, you married Supergirl for heaven's sakes.

C: Listen-

K: Mumble away, kids! That's what your future looks like if you can mumble your way through a performance.

C: Mumble core.

M: So what you're saying is, voice acting then is very much like theater acting? Where like you've gotta play to the back row, right? Like you can't see that person's eye from a hundred feet away.

C: This guy!

K: Right? This fucking guy, he made-

C: You've found a way to bring it back to CATS! Wow!

K: Thank you, fucking excellent job, now there's a writer. Marc Bernardin is a writer.

M: *singing* Midnight and the kitties are sleeping..

K: Yes, your theater training really comes in handy in that shit, I never fucking put that together!

C: Yeah! Because you learn how to take a truthful feeling and amplify it, that's what the best stage acting is, right? An emotion that an actor is feeling that can reach the back of the house and, with voice acting is that same sort of thing, but your relationship is with the microphone uhm, and it needs to go through the microphone and then into the character and then the audience gets to it. So it's a whole-- There's a learning curve, I feel like it takes a second. Hopefully we got it right.

K: Now you're way younger than us, so I don't know if like- was He-Man in your wheelhouse growing up? Or that was before you?

C: He-Man, yeah, He-Man was on uh-- we didn't have cable when I was a kid, 'cause we didn't have the money for it. So I was watching, they were rerunning it on-- I'm trying to think what network it would've been. I can't even think of the names of what they were back then, but they were running- it was the rerun after the original series had aired. 'Cause I would watch that and I would watch X-Men, those are my cartoons.

M: Where'd you grew up, in New York?

C: In Ohio. Yeah, Dublin, Ohio, home of Wendy's, yeah.

K: That's true, that's where Wendy's begins, is in Ohio!

C: Yeah and there's a callback to Wendy! So..

M: This guy!

K: There's a writer, there's a writer! *points at both Marc and Chris*

M: High five!

K: What uh-- you know, we gotta be very careful of course, when we talk about MOTU, all of us are NDA'd up the A-H. You gotta play two different characters, what was that like?

C: That was one of the fun aspects of Prince Adam slash He-Man. It's finding these very different placements for the same person, right? So it has to feel like the same character but that, their emotional states are- Prince Adam is sort of in a different place: he's covering, he's deflecting, he's more fun and goofy..And then He-Man we have to drop the truth of his core mission, you know, to save the world, so..I mean, it starts with registers, right? That was the easy part. Prince Adam is supposed to be full of youth so he's a little higher and a little more excited, and then He-Man, *lower voice* go down and be more heroic, down in the basement and use his big fighty-fight voice.

K: It's pretty awesome, like you join a tradition of storytelling in which performers get to be two people, like you know, whoever plays Batman gets to do Bruce Wayne, and then they get to do the Dark Knight, whoever plays Superman gets to do Clark Kent and then they get to do the Man of Steel, so you get to do Prince Adam and then you also get to be his heroic alter ego, man.

C: Right.

K: It's a wonderful fraternity that you join.

C: Although I hear I'm in deep trouble, because the internet has found out that I'm not bulking up--

M: You're not doing the work?

C: --for my performance.

K: Somebody on Twitter was just like "Chris Wood, he's not big enough to play He-Man!" and they meant in size!

M: "Have you seen his thighs? His thighs are not nearly there!"

K: "He skips leg day all the time" but oh my God--

C: You're right! "He can't possibly play the character!"

K: Yeah I had to point out, I was like "I better get in touch with Netflix and see if they'll send Chris some steroids and a fucking peloton so he could do the the voice in an animated series."

M: Also, Chris is not from another planet. That's also an issue. Could you not have cast an indigenous actor to play somebody from Eternia?

K: Who was it tweeted, somebody tweeted something about Griffin Newman, they were like "Oh, tell Griffin we gotta cut his fucking legs off". Maybe it was there, texted that, tweeted that. What uh, now that you've voice acted and led an animated series: is it something that you see yourself doing again? I mean, of course, hopefully we all get to do this one again, but other stuff. You got like one of them Disney voices and you can sing like a motherfucker, man.

C: Oh man, I would love to do Disney too. Let's uh, put that in the bucket list. I honestly, I get a real kick out of it, it's..like you said you can really go to a larger-than-life place, and it all, it always has to come from, you know, something sincere, that sense of play has to be grounded in something. You just kind of yell and scream, I think people can hear that..so there's a challenge to it, but it's also super rewarding because you get to, you know, play characters that fly on cats that are oversized and wear armor and..

M: Jellicle cats?

K: None of that Jellicle shit in our show, Marc! Battle cats!

M: What kind of Jellicle are you? I'm a cringer cat!

K:*jokingly* Somebody point a sword at me, quick. Yeah man, it's a..

C: It's a long life with He-Man too, 'cause this, I mean the character is so fun and obviously..I had the action figures when I was a kid and those toys..I hope to introduce my son to Masters of the Universe via the action figures, 'cause I mean they're so weird! They really went there-- have you seen that special that they do on the toys on the Netflix show?

K: Oh yeah, the toy, the wonderful-

M: The Toys That Made Us.

K: -The Toys That Made Us.

C: Yeah, yeah The Toys That Made Us.

K: Their He-Man episode is unbelievably wonderful.

C: Oh, it's great! And it just shows you- you know they were thinking "what weird crap would a little boy like, put together on a toy?" And then they end up with these wild names, and these characters who do insane things and it's part of why it's so fun. And the fact that they found a way to build a story around those bizarre toys, that was also compelling.

K: Thank God they did--

C: 30 years later, it's amazing.

K: Thank God they did, we all have fuckin jobs, all three of us.

C: *laughs* You're right.

K: Wait so before we let you go, it occurs to me that Melissa just had her episode air of Supergirl, that she directed.

C: Directorial debut!

K: That's right! Did you- Did the Wood-Benoists or Benoist-Woods- did you guys like kick back and watch it together?

C: You know, we didn't because *laughs* we don't have cable. So, no!

K: Don't let CW hear that, or perhaps do and they'll pay for cable! Why don't you have cable? Where are you quarantining?

C: We're in California, so we're home, but we're usually not home.

K: Right! Oh my gosh, that's right!

C: As a fortunate actor you move to California to never be there. I was shooting in New York and she was shooting in Vancouver when this all started and we were lucky to get home quickly but uh, but yeah I mean, we don't spend that much time in our house, so we don't have cable!

K: Tell 'em why you were in New York. Was it the- that's been announced, right?

C: Yeah, yeah for Thirtysomething, Thirtysomethingelse which is an ABC show that hopefully, knock on me, hopefully ends up going when we get out of this situation with Covid. Yeah, it's a reboot of Thirtysomething, another 80s classic.

K: Oh my God, that's-- you'll have two, you'll have fuckin MOTU and Thirtysomething. I watched Thirtysomething in real time when I was a kid, I loved that show, my mom watched it so I watched it with her and stuff, so I know all about Hope and Michael. I saw that they were redoing the show and I saw that fucking Chris was involved and I was like "What?!", and I texted him "Are you fucking for real?" and shit, and you're playing Hope and Michael's- did they announce that? I don't know

C: Yeah, yeah, I'm their son, yeah.

K: So he's tied in-

M: He's a legacy character!

K: Legacy character and like-

C: Legacy! This is what's all about.

K: That's fucking dope, man. So I mean, look I can't wait to watch that, but I have seen and heard four animatics so far of MOTU and-

C: Oh man.

K:- your performance..

C: I cannot wait.

K: It's wonderful, you did a great, great job and made me proud as the guy who was like "You know who'd be good? This guy." Put you forward--

C: This guy and they're like "who's that?" and you're like "hang on, let me tell ya!"

K: Yes, "Here let me pull up IMDb". They knew who he was, they know you, man.

M: If you did like The Music Man it wouldn't have been an issue: “You know who’d be good? Wood would be good, if he could do that, I bet you Wood could.”

C: *Laughs* Well, you got He-Man, my friends. (inaudible) city.That was a, that was a deep cut.

M: Hell yes.

K:Look at you, look at how you came to life with a little theater ref, man. Jazz hands all around.

C: Oh yeah, you can feel the jazz hands from there in the Cantina.

M: Touching us all over

K: Go back and enjoy the rest of your Thursday night, thanks for hanging out with us, say hello to the good lady Benoist and whatnot.

C: Thank you gentlemen. It was wonderful seeing you both.

M: Good to see you, sir. Be well.

C: Alright guys, be well.

K: Give it up for He-Man himself, Chris Wood, everybody.

M: *cheers*

K: Mon-El..flies away. He’s so good, such a good guy. I forgot he was such a fucking theater kid, that’s right, and we were like talking theater and shit. And I forgot his connection to Garber. One more we wrote in.

M: We have another point of entry.

K: That’s true, that’s good. Man, I’m telling you, I ain’t fucking around, his script was one of the most impressive thing I’ve ever read,

M: Yeah, that’s awesome.

K: It did make me feel jealous where I’m like “he’s that pretty and he can write like this? Like, all I had was writing, fuck!”

M: That’s a problem.

K: God, what a good guy.

[every1studio]

like a kdrama /“how you guys met” edition [day6]

genre: FLUFF

ficstyle:  bulletpoints + reactions + #whatwouldtheydo + LONG

prompt: “how would you encounter each member and how you guys would keep seeing each other”

note: I think I like these “like a kdrama” series... but like they are slowly becoming a collective of mini drabbles...

SUNGJIN

he was packing up his guitar

“today’s another successful buskering day...”

Sungjin slings his guitar case

causing it to hit you and falling over 

breaking your guitar into pieces

he felt like he bumped into someone so he turned around

you were just crying over your guitar

“nonononononono”

he clasped his hands over his mouth

“I’M SO SORRY!!”

you turned to look at him with watery eyes

and he felt his heart tightened

you were crying because of something he did

he kneels down

“can I offer to buy you a new guitar?”

you shook your head

“but... guitars are so expensive...”

you couldn’t fix this one 

and you definitely didn’t have the money for another one

a chuckle escaped from his smile

“and I ended up breaking yours..it won’t settle in well for me if I don’t..”

with that he asked for your number

you both went to go look for a new guitar for you

it ended up feeling like a date

“that one looks nice”

you tried to reach for it but you were too short

he comes up from behind you and gets it for you

“he-here you go..”

even after he got you a new guitar, you guys would meet up

having guitar sessions and buskered together

every time you both were playing the guitar and sang, you guys had the habit of looking into each other’s eyes

not pulling away until the song was over

people started to ship you guys

you guys lowkey shipped each other

it’s only a matter of time before you guys move on from this silly crush

JAE

Wonpil stole his glasses from him and hid them

though he didn’t really need them; he just liked wearing them

he wasn’t in the mood to deal with Wonpil so he went out to get coffee

di-ding 

upon entering the coffeeshop, he bumps into you spilling a customer’s drink on him

“OH MY GOSH, I’M SO SORRY... JUN!! COULD YOU MAKE ANOTHER LATTE FOR TABLE 3?”

you frantically cleaned the spill off of the left side of his chest

he was just looking at you

how short you were compared to him

how strands of hair was falling into your line of vision

how your hand was on his beating heart

how beautiful you were

(wait... HER HAND IS ON MY HEART)

his heart beats faster upon realizing this

“I’MSORRYI’MSOSOSOSORRY!!”

he shakes his head; coming up with a plan

“I lost my glasses.. so it’s my fault for running into you..”

you gave him a concerned face

“do you want to lead you to a table for you to sit down? I’ll take your order there too?”

(with any chance that he had with you, he’d take it)

he started smiling shyly as he nods his head

you lightly grabbed his hand and led him to a table with a view of the counter where you’d be working

he also pretended like he couldn’t read the menu; so you bent down, face to face, to read each item to him

“could I get cappuccino then?”

you nodded smiling widely

he just fell in love in that moment that you were making a drink for him

when you came back, he tried to be cheeky

he points to his shirt

“you should take it to the dry cleaners..”

but you smiled; you caught onto him

“you just want my number, don’t you?”

he was getting even more shy and embarrassed

but when he went to go pay for his drink, you wrote your number on his receipt

since that day, he’s visited you at the coffeeshop EVERYDAY

“a coffee a day, makes me want to make you my bae” 

was on a napkin that Jae gave to you

“I found it on the floor and it seemed relevant”

YOUNG K 

this was the first day of your business statistics class

none of your friends had that same class so you were all by yourself

you sat down near the front but not in the front row

you needed to pay attention in class but you didn’t want the instructor looking at you the whole time

(this is a good spot) you thought

UNTIL 

this big head sits in front of you

you looked around and there were so many other seats

he HAD to sit in the one in front of you

you tried clearing your throat to get his attention

but he was too busy taking out his laptop

you tried to be nice and tap him on the shoulder

he looks back at you; up and down

before you could say anything else, he turns back around to face the front

you scoffed as you rolled your eyes

you kicked his chair

“listen I was trying to be nice, why they hell are you sitting RIGHT in front of me?”

he doesn’t turn around, “because I can easily talk to the instructor this way.. the perfect seat.. if you’re so short just sit on a pillow or two”

ever since that day, you and that kid had a battle of dominance 

it may seemed childish but none of you were going to give up the seats

even after class, you guys would often see each other on campus

probably had the same major as each other

you guys would race to get to the counter of a coffeeshop first and get a ridculous order just to piss each other and the worker off

out of nowhere, he wasn’t in class

which was weird because he was always in class

it didn’t worry you at first

but finals were coming up

you made sure you took good enough notes for him to use

you didn’t even know his name

after 2 weeks, you walked into class to see him sitting in front of your seat again

you couldn’t help but get a little concern

“where the hell were you?”

“that’s none of your-”

FWAK

you tossed the notes that you rewrote for him from your notes

“I just did it because it was like reviewing over all the topics..”

you sat down and he just looked at you in awe

he looks back down at the book and it was labeled “idiot who sits in front of me”

you heard him chuckle as you saw his hand in front of you

“I’m YoungK...I was..with my band.. we were performing these past two weeks..”

“psh, what’s your real name”

“Youn-”

“YOUR REAL NAME!”

“brian..”

“what?”

“BRIAN!”

“OKAY GEEZ!”

you guys found that you both had the same major so you guys ended up studying together a lot 

“study dates” your guys’ friends would call them

but were they?

he’s always thought you were cute 

but annoying

and you always thought he was fine as fudge buckets

but cocky

WHO KNOWS

WONPIL

you were on the bus

finishing your shift; you were a bartender

it was a risky job for a female too

but you were confident in defending for yourself

it was 4AM; it was the weekend and people were going home drunk at this time

“pr-pretty laaadddyy, why hiccups why are you all by yourself?” a sleazly looking guy stands next to you

the bus was packed and you’d just given up your seat for an older gentleman; who ended up falling asleep

no one was doing anything; they were just watching this guy edge closer to you

you were about to call him out and fight him

but a younger guy slides in between you and the sleazebag 

“sorry babe, I got caught in the back of the bus...”

you looked at him

he was a really sweet looking boy

he was trying to get this old drunkard off of you

but you could tell he was a little under-prepared and a little shy

within an instant, you clung onto his arm

“I was wondering where you were,” you pecked him on the cheek

the bus stopped 

thankfully it was your stop

you and the guy got off as the sleazly guy eyes you guys

the bus left and the guy slid his arm from your grasp

“I’m glad you’re okay now.. I .. I gotta go..”

“wait!” 

as he turns around, you gave him a peck on the cheek again

“thank you, honestly I would’ve done fine on my own.. but having you there really made me feel safe..”

you gave him your business card, and you smiled as you backed away; motioning for him to text you

but he doesn’t leave, he walks up to you

“I don’t feel comfortable with you walking home during this time..”

you smiled

“are you already trying to be my boyfriend?”

his eyes start to waver

“you don’t have anywhere to be?”

he shook his head, “just home..”

“I’m y/n..” you took out your hand

he moves in to shake it, “Wonpil..”

but you laced your fingers with his

“I’ll feel safer this way..”

he just takes it and blushes

(why is it so fun teasing him? it’s too cute)

to your surprise, he lived in the same complex as you

and you saw him basically every morning and night

after finding out where you lived, he went out of his way to take you home

it just became a routine but he was still shocked when you told him you wanted to date him

“we already act like a couple, shouldn’t we just be one already?”

DOWOON

you just wanted to de-stress

exams were kicking your butt and it was killing you

you went to an arcade to just get your head outta the educational gutter of mess

you went for the Street Fighter machine

usually you did well; setting scores

but today, not only were exams kicking your butt

the person on the other side was kicking your butt too

not once

not twice

5 TIMES

you lost to the person 5 times

a little mad and a little irritated, you stormed to the other side

“couldn’t you have let me won once?”

Dowoon looks over to see such a gorgeous being

out of timidness. he looks back onto the screen

“you should’ve played harder..”

“excuse me?”

he didn’t want to say that, but it was the first thing that he could say to you

his emotionless face didn’t help the situation either

“HEY DON’T TALK TO DOWOON-OPPA LIKE YOU KNOW HIM!!”

a bunch of girls started to surround you and yelling at you

apparently, he was a popular pretty boy from the other school in the city and you were being rude?

he didn’t want his “fans” to be so involved with his life

“get lost,” he told them as he grabbed your wrist and led you out of the arcade

you both stopped in front of an convenience store

“sorry..I didn’t mean to say what I did early.. I’m just-”

“used to it?”

he looks at you as if you could understand what he’s feeling without having to say anything

“you’re probably popular yourself..” he says as he shuffles his feet into the concrete ground

you laughed

he thought it was the purest thing in the world

“what makes you think that?”

“you’re...pretty..”

you blushed, “th-thanks...um..Dowoon?”

he nods, smiling a little bit

“I’m-”

the sound of your grumbling stomach interrupts you 

you both start laughing

“I’m y/n..”

“well y/n.. I’m gonna treat you to the best convenience food combo; ramen, ddukbokki with potato chips and cheese~”

you picked out drinks as he made the food

when the both of you were done, you both sat across from each other

“be careful~ it’s hot~”

a couple of girls walked by

“oooh look at them~ talk about a visual couple~”

you choked on your food as he opened up your peach milk for you

“th-the things people say huh?” he says as he busies himself with his banana milk

“ye-yeah..”

little did you guys know, that you guys became known as the “convenience store couple” since you guys were always there after being at the arcade

did you guys actually become a thing? only time will tell

END

[masterlist + guidelines]

[wildegreenlight]

Brilliant or Barmy?

A/N: this is just a little Valentine drabble (actually a one shot) that sprang into my head this morning. I hope you enjoy! Warning: there has been no editing or beta-ing, so proceed at your own risk! There is a little easter egg for my DEM girls :)

There were a long list of really amazing things about being Ron Weasley’s girlfriend; however, Hermione thought with a sigh, Valentine romance was apparently not on that list. She had been more than a little thrilled when she discovered that Valentine’s Day would coincide with a Hogsmeade weekend and one of Ron’s rare weekends off from training. Now, Hermione had always prided herself in not succumbing to what she had frequently referred to as a “rubbish consumeristic excuse for a holiday”, but she hated to admit that this year was different.

In fact, many things that she had previously scoffed at were now commonplace. She wrote Ron horribly sentimental letters, referred to him frequently in conversation: My boyfriend always says, or Well, my boyfriend and I…, kissed him in the presence of other people, and all without feeling an ounce of shame. It wasn’t surprising then, that she had spent the last month envisioning a day filled with tea at Madame Puddifoots, heart shaped confections, and passionate kisses. The scenario that she had played over and over in her mind usually ended in them abandoning their tea in favor of a more private location.  They had not talked about it in their letters, but she couldn’t help but hope that he had made arrangements for a room, one with a large bed and if there were a few rose petals and candles scattered about what would that hurt?

So to say that the day had not gone as she had imagined would be an understatement. Ron had been affectionate, but not in that “I haven’t seen you in a month and I can’t get wait to get you out of your knickers” way that she had grown to love. On the contrary, her knickers, specially purchased for the occasion, were still frustratingly in place.

So far the day had consisted of a trip to Tomes and Scrolls, where she did finally buy a small stack of new books when it became obvious Ron was not in a hurry; a visit to Scrivinshafts where Ron acquired a new quill that was suggested to the new recruits as every Auror’s favorite. They had not so much as paused at Madame Puddifoots, and now she was beginning to wonder if there might be something wrong.

Maybe it was nothing. To be perfectly honest she had never seen Ron get excited about Valentine’s Day in the past, they had joked about it many times over the years when the rest of the students seem to go quite mad. Even in sixth year he had not, much to her delight at the time, even gotten Lavender a card or a gift, Oh, honestly, are you still grinning about that? The poor girl had been devastated, weeping on Pavarti’s shoulder about it until the wee hours!

Oh, well, as long as they were together she guessed that the rest just didn’t matter. She decided to enjoy the remainder of the day even if it didn’t live up to some silly expectation. As they walked through the crowded street, she gripped his hand just a little tighter.

“Hermione?”

“Hm?”

“You alright?”

“Yes, of course! Why do you ask?” She stopped and looked up at him, praying that her poor attitude had not hurt his feelings.

“Well, I just wanted today to be what you wanted and I…well I’m usually rubbish at this so I tried to remember everything we talked about.”

For the life of her she couldn’t figure out what he was talking about. Everything they talked about? “Today has been lovely, Ron. But I’m not sure what you mean.”

“You don’t? You really don’t?” The disbelief on his face quickly changed to amusement as he reached into his coat pocket, handing her a rather worn piece of parchment.

She unfolded it, still perplexed, until she saw  Valentine’s Day…Brilliant or Barmy?  in Ron’s large sloping hand with a neatly printed chart in her own hand beneath.

“Ron? I can’t believe…you kept this!! When did we make it? Fourth year? Fifth?”

“Fourth.”

Tears blurred her vision as she examined the list they had made together, laughing in the common room as so many of their fellow Gryffindors were entranced by Valentine mania. There among the entries in the “Brilliant” category were “Buying New Books”,“Shopping for Quills” ,”Candies at Honeydukes (as long as they aren’t heart shaped); while under the “Barmy” column were “Madame Pudifoots”, “Ridiculous Love Poems”, and “Wasting Galleons on Cupid Themed Atrocities”.  How could she have forgotten?  

“At first when I found out I would get to see you this weekend, I started planning all sorts of barmy things…drove myself mental trying to think of a way to make it perfect for you,” he paused, looking more than a little embarrassed, “but then I got a letter from Dad and he said that I shouldn’t worry so much, that I knew you better than anyone else did, that I would know what you would like to do….that’s when I remembered that we had already planned the perfect day.”

“Honestly, any day that I get to spend with you is as perfect as I will ever need,” she reached up with her free hand and cupped his cheek, rosy from the chilly wind.

“I feel the same way, you know that don’t you?”

“I do, but there is something YOU need to know.”

“What?”

“My list may have changed just a tiny bit since fourth year,” Hermione stretched up on tiptoe to whisper in his ear, “but you’ll have to look under my robes to find out exactly how.”

Ron growled his reply, “Guess it’s a good thing I reserved a room for us.”

“Then why in the name of Merlin are we standing here?”

****

Hours later Hermione rolled over to find Ron padding across the rented room, “Not that I don’t appreciate the view, but what in the world are you doing out of this bed?”

“Sorry, had a little updating to do,” he flashed her a cheeky grin as he bent over the desk, brandishing his new quill.

“Hope I didn’t make the barmy list.”

“Guess you’ll just have to look and see.”

Hermione bounded across the room, as starkers as her boyfriend, to find that he had written RED LACE KNICKERS in large block letters at the bottom of the brilliant column. She grabbed the quill and added her own entry:  STAYING IN BED TOGETHER ALL DAY.

Without another word, Ron, scooped her up and took them both back to bed, because really, who was he to disappoint his Valentine?

[lupienne]

Who’s Number 1?

I realized I never put this older fic up on here. *reads it over* No wonder… Heh. Well, anyway… It’s Sherry x Negan smut. 7,261 words. (Why the fuck is this so long? Editing is your friend, you long-winded idiot.) Possessive Sherry/ switchy Negan. (and comic-based as per usual for me. It’s also set in my ‘Days of his Wives’ timeline but you don’t need to read that.)

And yeah…my smut is about as clunky and unsexy as a pair of granny panties.

Sherry’s hair was tousled and she’d thrown on a wrinkled t-shirt and a short skirt with sneakers. She wasn’t meeting her polished Negan’s wife standard, and she didn’t care.

Negan gave her a disapproving look as she descended the stairs to Sanctuary’s main level. But he kept his mouth shut and loudly drew a few random Saviors over to watch him play ping-pong.

She huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. “Oh, what a great pass,” she said sarcastically as Negan missed and the ball hit the ground inches from her feet.

“Lucky shot,” he mumbled.

She crossed her arms tighter. Shit, it was cold down here. Outside, the snow was flying. She could barely see the fence through the factory windows, and the chained walkers were unmoving blobs. The cold slowed them down, made them sluggish.

It’d been cold in her bed last night too. She’d been about to tuck in for the night, dragging another blanket from Negan’s closet. He followed her into the girl’s room.

“Something you want?” She flopped down the blanket, giving him a sour look.

He was peering at the sixth bed in the room, which Nova had turned into a junk pile. “You girls…uh…don’t use that bed…do you?”

She looked up from making her bed, eyes narrowed in suspicion. “Why?”

“I’ve been thinking-”

“No.”

“What?”

“What you’re thinking, Negan. And the answer is no.”

“But I didn’t even say anything…”

“I know what you’re going to say!” Her voice rose. “You are not bringing another woman in here!”

“I wasn’t going to say that.” He tried playing the innocent card. It backfired, as always. He was the polar opposite of innocent.

“Who?” she said. It didn’t matter. She was just laying out her kindling all around him. Ready to strike a match and burn him down.

“No one…” He shrugged, picking at the hem of his shirt. He sent her a doleful smile. “Well. I had a conversation with one of the new chicks. Charlotte-”

“That red-headed slag? I should have fucking known.”

She’d seen the new Savior girl come in last week. Been a witness to Carson passing her off to old Molly to show her the ins-and-outs of Sanctuary. And Sherry knew Charlotte was just the sort of girl Negan would want to have ins-and-outs with. Long red hair, freckles dappled on her face and arms like a little wild pony for him to tame.

“I wouldn’t describe her like that…” His lips quirked. “She-”

“Conversation, huh?” She sneered. “How ever did she manage to speak when her mouth was full of your cock?”

“Heh. I wish…” Negan shut up in mid-chuckle and backed away from her. His hands up as she came at him with clenched fists. “Whoa, whoa…wait a minute.” He deflected a blow to the crotch. “You crazy bitch, watch where you’re fucking aiming!”

“I am watching!” She kicked him in the shin.

“C'mon, Sherry.”

“Don’t ‘cmon, Sherry’ me!” She screamed. “You think this shit is funny?! We have to devote ourselves to you, and yet, you’re out sleeping around, bringing home who-knows-what goddamn diseases.. and you just fucking brought Amber in!”

And that was it, most of all. She was pushed back to fifth place. Bumped out of her throne by Shanda and Jazzi and teenage jailbait and little Miss Can’t-Do-Wrong Amber…and now? He wanted to shove her into sixth.

Her throat burned with bile.

Negan gave her puppy-eyes. “I’m just fucking with you! Look, I’m not adding any more. Seriously! Sherry, it’s just a joke…”

“You’re always going on about how you want to fuck a redhead.”

“I didn’t sleep with her. I’m not going to. I think she wants me to…but I’m not gonna do that shit! I fuckin’ promise!”

“She wants you to…” She forcefully fluffed her pillow. “You are so goddamn full of yourself. You fucking pig. Get the hell out of my room.”

“Yeah, get out.” Nova’s voice came from behind Negan’s bulk. “You’re in my way. Dickhead.”

The girl shoved past him, her face sullen. She must’ve overheard.

“Fine…” He snorted. “And I fucking mean it. Last thing I need is more goddamn nagging harpies on my ass. In fact, maybe I ought to downsize.”

“Get out.”

He remained rigid. “Get out? This is my fucking house, Sherry, and I don’t have to ask your fucking permission on who’s going to live in it-”

“Get out!”

He slammed their door behind him. Nova and Sherry exchanged a disgusted look, before each retiring to their beds for the night.

He was already gone when she got up in the morning. She had a feeling he’d crash in one of his men’s room that night or make an excuse to hit the road for a few days.

Fucking weak-ass douchebag.

She was even more annoyed that, despite the cold, Negan had taken off his leather coat. His white shirt clinging to his muscles, leather gloves crinkling around the racket. It wasn’t just her eye that was being taken by his attractiveness.

Charlotte was standing on the other side of the table, sandwiched between two elder Saviors who were frequent observers of ping-pong matches. The old man, Orson, was also their door sentry. Charlotte’s long hair was buffeting him in the face repeatedly throughout the match. For every time Negan glanced in her direction, her hair would toss, her lip bit between seductive teeth. Then she would coyly flit her eyes away, flush spreading across her freckles.

A dimple showed in Negan’s cheek every fucking time.

Sherry’s eyes were dark. She knew that smile of his. That look. ‘I’m going to bend you over and fuck you raw, honey.’

Another hair toss. Orson finally stepped away. Charlotte was definitely down for that. She clapped along with the elders when the predictable end of the match came. Negan set down the racket and gave a little curtsy to the weak applause.

“Thank you, thank you. You may resume your daily scheduled tasks.” Such a gracious leader, for letting them stop work just to watch him prance about, feeding his already bloated ego.

How fucking generous.

The crowd broke up as he strutted away. Her vision was blocked by Saviors going this way and that, but she swore she saw a flash of red hair…heading down the same hallway Negan had taken.

You fucking scag. You’d better not even try it.

She was already playing the scene in her mind. Charlotte telling him how great he was at ping-pong! Him pulling her into a storage room and pushing her to her knees. Fisting her red hair, making her choke on him. Telling her he always loved a little fucking ginger.

Firecracker. That’s what’d he call her. Mmm…little firecracker, taking my cock like a pro. Don’t tell my wives…

She growled, but inwardly berated herself. Charlotte was an opportunistic tart, surely, but Negan was no saint in the matter. He encouraged it. It was silly to lay blame solely on the girl. And yet. Her fingernails turned to claws, as her possessive heart disregarded reason, as it filled with rage. Her territory was being breached.

She followed the trespasser, and Charlotte followed Negan. The bitch was tailing him, moving down all the same corridors. Sherry kept back at a discreet distance, letting the beacon of the fiery hair guide her. When he stopped, so did Charlotte, and so too did Sherry. The girl made pathetic attempts to look busy when he chatted up fellow Saviors. Waiting for the opportunity to pounce when he was alone.

Sherry ducked behind a large pipe as Negan stopped towards the entryway of one of the foundry’s many vast rooms. There was a storage closest on the far wall she was quite familiar with, and the sight of its rusted door never failed to get her juices literally flowing. It was a place she and Negan had met in her days prior to becoming his first wife. Trembling with the thrill of discovery, savoring the secrecy of it.

You gonna start another tryst in there today, Neegs?

Charlotte squared her shoulders and approached him. Closer…closer…and then Tara came through the doorway and nearly collided with him. He shoved her lightly, she shoved him back, and they engaged in their typical vulgar banter. Charlotte’s shoulders slumped…mistaking their verbal jabs for flirtation. She quickly turned and headed back down the hallway towards Sherry, trying to look nonchalant.

You dumb bitch.

Sherry slid into the shadows behind the pipe, her fingers trailing it. They came away coated with soot. She frowned and rubbed them off on her wrist…it looked like a bruise in the dim light. Charlotte was getting closer, her feet scraping the ground. Sherry held up her dirt-stained wrist, a sudden idea sparking.

Negan and Tara disappeared through the doorway, still yammering at each other. Charlotte ceased her casual walk and let out a sigh.

“Psst,” Sherry said, peering out from around the pipe.

“Oh! You scared me.”

“Come over here…”

“Um…is something wrong?”

“You don’t know me.” Sherry scrunched her neck into her shoulders, her green eyes wide and flitting fearfully about. “But…I noticed you were following Negan.” She swallowed hard.

“Oh…” Charlotte shook her head. “I wasn’t-”

“I’d stay away from him. He’s bad news.”

“I’m not following him. I was just…walking in the same direction.”

“Yeah. You were.” She sniffled. “I’ve seen it before. Lots of girls want to be a quick side fling. Think they’ll get favors or extra points.”

“What I do is none of your beeswax. And I wasn’t going to-”

Sherry talked right over her. “He’ll fuck you, sure, but that’ll be it. He won’t give you anything else. Might rough you up a little. He uh…tries to go easy on us…because we’re his wives.”

Charlotte stared at her.

“Doesn’t want it to come out how he hurts us. Our ‘husband’…wants to come across as generous and loving. It’s an 'honor’ to be with him. So…he holds back. Girls like you? You don’t mean shit to him and none of you will ever speak out against him.”

The redhead glanced back to the doorway, shifting uncomfortably. “You’re…a wife?”

“Yeah. Worst mistake of my life.” She peered out from around the pipe, gnawing at her lip. “But uh…I didn’t say that.”

“…You guys look like you have it so good.” Charlotte’s eyes dropped to Sherry’s wrist, where it was clutched tightly across the brunette’s chest. “And Negan seems… nice.”

Sherry laughed. “Nice? He just wants to fuck you. Use you.” She shifted her arms, faking a wince of pain. “Please. Just stay away from him.”

The girl’s eyes were still on her faux bruise, and then they trailed along the sooty pipe. Her chin suddenly jutted out. “That…that’s just dirt. And I saw you earlier… your arm wasn’t like that.”

Sherry smirked, stepping out from behind the pipe. “Well. Aren’t you the observant little bitch. You fucking got me.”

The corridor was abandoned. She reached out, grabbing Charlotte’s collar with both hands, and twirled her about, slamming her into the wall behind the pipe. Charlotte gasped.

“Hey!”

Sherry bared her teeth. “I’ll admit it. I got a little theatrical.” She drew the girl away from the wall, slammed her back again. Charlotte grunted, smacking her in the face. Sherry returned the blow, but it was with a closed fist. The redhead yelped.

“But believe me when I tell you…you fuck with Negan…and you will be fucked up.”

“By who? You?” Charlotte panted, her hand curling into a fist.

“Ah-ah-ah… don’t even. You know what happens to people who touch one of Negan’s wives? I say the word and half of your face is gonna be char-broiled.”

Charlotte’s lip quivered as Sherry smiled, a slow cruel spread of the lips.

“Just look at Dwight. You’ve seen him around, yeah? Guy with a burnt face?” Her stomach twisted guiltily, but she ignored it. “He used to be my husband.”

The girl’s fist loosened.

“That’s right. You be a good girl and keep your slutty hands away from my man…and your life will be fucking splendid.” She patted Charlotte’s flushed cheek. “Got it?”

“Y-y-yeah…” The girl fled as soon as she was released. Sherry waited until she was gone until she bent double, stifling laughter in her hand.

Oh my God. That was awesome. That is probably the bitchiest thing I’ve ever done!

She straightened up, shifting her thighs together. Something hot and heavy was curling in her stomach, and it wasn’t her earlier guilt. Oh no…it was something much different…gripping the entirety of her body and darkening her eyes.

Time to mark my fucking territory.

She tracked Negan down. He wasn’t far from the doorway, still bantering with Tara. When he saw her, he dismissed his female lieutenant.

“Next time I see you, you’re gonna be walking with a limp…” Tara smirked, giving Sherry a nod. Negan grunted.

“Get the fuck out of my sight.”

Tara mock-bowed. “Of course, sir. I’ll be sure to add a bag of ice to my scavenging list.”

“Bitch.” He grunted as Tara made her exit. He heaved a sigh and turned his eyes on Sherry. “Ice. Right. Because that’s what you’re fuckin’ here for, right? To bust my goddamn balls?”

“We need to talk.”

“Oh, fuck me sideways – don’t say that. You know how much I dread those four fucking words?”

“In private.” She grabbed his jacket sleeve. “Come along, mister.”

“Sherry, I’m fucking busy.”

“Walk.”

He grunted again, following her back into the hallway.

“Get in there.”

“What the shit, Sherry. Can’t you wait until later? When I’m home?”

“You aren’t coming home. You’re gonna hide tonight.”

“Yeah…and you know why. I don’t want to be walking with a limp.”

“I promise I won’t touch your balls.” That was a lie. But he didn’t have to know that.

Once he was in the storage closet, and the door shut, she turned to give him a severe look. There was a small casement window that let in dim, dusty light. Dust motes floated above their heads. Memories of stifled moans and sweat flooded back to her.

Negan shifted his weight. “Heh. Isn’t this our closet…?”

“Yeah.”

“I see.” He looked away from her. “You brought me in here to fucking tell me you’re leaving, right? Like, where we started is where you’re gonna end it-”

“That Charlotte chick was following you.”

“She was?”

“Oh, don’t play dumb with me, you big fucker.”

“I didn’t see her, and fuck this bush-beating shit, Sherry. Just get to your fucking point.”

“Yeah. Sure, Negan.” She drew closer to him; and his eyebrows raised in apprehension. She noticed his hand was creeping around towards his belt, poised to protect his fragile cojones from her. He yelped as grabbed his lapels with both hands, yanking him down to her.

“Sherry, what the- mpph!”

His words were cut off by her vicious mouth. She batted away the hand at his belt, and began to unbuckle it.

“Mmmph…” He said through her kiss. His eyes went wide as she pulled on his bottom lip with her teeth. She growled, yanking his opened pants down, exposing the curve of his hip. Another yank, and there was his delicious happy trail.

“Sherry…?” He was stock-still, even as she gave another hard yank, leaving him standing with his boxers around his thighs and his junk hanging out. “What…”

“I need your dick in me. Now.”

“Uh…” He grinned like a moron. He took a step back, hiking his pants up. “…this is a trick, isn’t it?”

“Shut up, Negan!”

“You’re mad at me. I don’t want you near my dick.” He started to button up, and she flew at him, shoving him to the wall. Her hand thrust down into his boxers, gripping him in her first. Sliding up, down, her thumb rubbing under the head of his cock.

He shuddered, his hands fluttering in the air, unsure of what to do.

“Sure, I’m mad at you,” she hissed. “When am I not? So, how about we fuck and make up? Extra hard, so I can get all this irritation out of my system.”

He bit his lip, his eyebrows flinching as she continued to rub at his sensitive spot. She knew it was a bit too much stimulation out of the gate. But he was definitely starting to stiffen up. He pried her wrist away.

He nodded towards the door. “People will hear us.”

“Then keep your mouth shut.”

“It ain’t my mouth I’m worried about.”

She pulled off her wrinkled t-shirt and threw it at him. “Gag me, then.”

His eyebrows shot sky-high. His dick was definitely coming to life now. She saw it stir under the denim fabric. She came towards him, eyes glinting. Fuck, she was wet, and she shifted her hips. Swollen, aching.

He took a bandanna out of his pocket, discarding her shirt. “This really isn’t a trick, Sherry? You’re not gonna rip my balls off? Please say you’re not fucking with me.”

“I won’t be fucking with you if you don’t shut up!”

He just stood there like an idiot. She took his hand and pulled it up under her skirt. His breathing quickened when he felt her panties, when he crept one finger inside her slick wetness. She gasped slightly, pressing his hand more firmly against her. “Still think I’m lying to you…?”

“Ok. Ok. Fuck… Shit.” He fumbled to pull the bandanna around her mouth, tying it in a loose knot behind her head.

There was a table against one wall. She remembered that table well. It was solid and sturdy and didn’t make a lot of racket when two people were doing indecent things upon its metal surface. She gasped as Negan suddenly turned her, bending her over it with a rough motion. Equally rough, he yanked her panties and skirt down to her knees. His voice a growl in her ear. “How am I gonna know if it’s too rough for you…?” Her body jolting as he entered in one hard, deep stroke, and she cried into the gag. “Guess I won’t…”

“Mmmmpphh!” Her knees bent inward, her legs quivering. Her hand clawed ineffectively at the metal table. Pain sparked as he stretched her with his thick girth, as he filled her to the hilt.

“Ohhh…you’re so angry at me, Sherry.” He nipped her ear. “I’m gonna really have to fuck this animosity out of you.” He gave her a few, slow easy thrusts to start, letting her adjust – but not for long. Moments later, he had one hand wrapped her throat, her toes nearly leaving the ground with each hard thrust. His thighs connecting with her ass, the smack-smack of his balls against her. She saw stars.

And he was right – she was still filled with animosity. Because this could be Charlotte right now.

“I like you like this…” That deep voice, rumbling through his chest and into her. “Your fucking mouth shut? You should wear this fucking thing all the time.”

Asshole!

“Yeah. You talk way too fucking much. You don’t know your goddamn place. But you know it now, huh, Sher? Bent over and taking my fucking cock!”

You fucking asshole! She screamed through the gag, and he laughed. His hand came down with a loud smack on one of her ass cheeks. She jolted in surprise, screeching into the gag. Another slap to the other side. She shook her head, yelling reprimands into the bandanna.

“Stpphht!”

“Huh? Shouldn’t talk with your mouth full, Sher-Bear. That’s bad manners.” *Whack*. That big hand was gonna leave an imprint.

“Nggggnn!” She writhed under him. He leaned forward, pinning her with the weight of his body. She could hardly breathe.

“Don’t think I’ve gotten all that aggression out of you yet, babe.” He smacked her ass mercilessly. She writhed and struggled, her skin burning. Tears rose in her eyes, and she whimpered.

“Ngggn…stph…stphhh!”

“You gonna be a good girl?” He cooed into her ear, and she nodded. “Huh?” His teeth grazed her neck.

“Y-yessssh.”

He chuckled, leaning back to allow her space. She breathed in hard through her nose. He took her breath away again as he renewed his aggressive thrusts, his arms wrapping her torso and holding her to him. She moaned, the gag wet with spit. Her insides thrumming as his cock hammered into all the right spots. Her eyes rolled back. Fuck! This was heaven.

Ok…maybe I won’t bust his balls. She nearly laughed.

“Good girl,” He groaned. “There’s no need to get so fuckin’ riled up, babe, but fuck me if it ain’t flattering. I ain’t ever gonna risk losing this pussy.”

And… back to wanting to bust his balls again. He was such a scoundrel. Yeah. She liked that. Scoundrel. He’d get a kick out that endearment.

“You like that?” He cooed into her ear before licking tenderly along the column of her neck. She nodded.

“Mmmhmm.”

“Feels so good, huh?”

“Mmhmmm.”

“Yeah. You wanted my cock so bad you fuckin’ tracked me down. You know how fucking hard that makes me? You feel it?”

“Mmmhmmm.”

“You’re so fuckin’ wet for me, aren’t you?”

She snorted. His attempts at dirty talk were always laughable. She didn’t have any spare breath to chuckle. She delved a hand between her legs, rubbing two fingers on her clit. Sparks of pleasure travelled her spine. She wouldn’t last long at this rate.

He roughly grabbed her hand and pulled it away. “Did I say you could touch yourself?”

So much for marking my territory. Her damn territory was marking her! She growled and wrested her hand away. He let it go, but only so he could punish her ass with another stinging slap. She squealed. He grabbed both ass cheeks, digging his nails in and pounding her so hard the table slid several inches across the floor. He let out a deep groan.

She gasped under the onslaught, arching her back, wiggling her hips, squirming to get him in just the right spot to -

“Mmm. Sherry. Your fucking ass is so hot! Can I switch holes?”

She shook her head.

“What was that? Speak up, I didn’t hear a fucking thing you said!”

Another frantic head shake.

“Oh…I think I’m gonna,” he rasped. “I want to hear you screaming through that thing. But just think…no one else will be able to hear you…”

His finger teased her backdoor. She whimpered and tried to rip the gag off. “Nggn! Nnnn!”

He patted her butt with a laugh. “I’m just fuckin’ with you, babe. I ain’t ever gonna sneak in there without express permission. Well… not my dick anyway. I might still give you a little surprise…”

She jolted as his spit-slicked thumb pushed inside her rear. Then he was fucking her again, using the buried thumb as a goddamn handhold. Her head tilted sideways, as she moaned around the strip of cloth in her mouth.

He groped her breasts, gripped onto her thigh. Smack, smack, their bodies collided loudly. Gag or no gag, people would know exactly what was occurring in here. She hoped Charlotte was nearby. Listening, with an ear at the door. Her face as red as her hair with sheer jealousy.

“Hrrddrr,” She groaned through the gag. The metal table was slippery with her sweat. He took hold of her hip and obeyed; her body shunted back and forth.

“Fuck yeah,” he hissed. “You like it rough, huh, you jealous little bitch? I know that’s what this is allll about.”

She growled.

He took hold of her hand and roughly guided it between her legs. “Now you can touch yourself. I want you cumming before this fucking minute is up.”

Who the fuck is in charge here?

Well, it obviously wasn’t her. Her legs quivered as her fingers twisted between her legs. Fuck! His thick finger in her ass…his thrusts rocking her, her swollen nub twitching under her touch…

“You don’t cum soon, and I’m gonna start fucking your ass, Sherry. You want that? I fucking want it, so believe me, I ain’t got shit to lose.”

That thick cock sinking into her ass! Her insides twisted in dread, and anticipation… Her clit twitched under her fingers. Even with the gag, her whimpering cries rang off the walls.

“You’re running out of time, baby.” He bucked against her hard, his breaths ragged. The big motherfucker wouldn’t last long enough to fuck her ass anyway!

She pulled the gag down. “…this ain’t… hard enough…”

“Hey…” He tried to wrest the gag back in place, but it was too much effort. “Alright, babe. How’s this?”

The metal table ground against the floor as it slid forward several inches. She braced herself against it with both hands. Her bones rattled from the impact. He fisted her hair in one hand, yanking her head back, leaving his mark on her neck.

Yes. Give that bitch something to look at!

“Yes…yes…Negan…” She praised him in whimpering moans, and he responded with even more effort to please her.

Pressure built in her core, and she writhed on the table, her hands clenching onto the edge with white knuckles. His balls slapping her, loud delightful smacks, oh, how she loved that sound! The wet sloppy sounds of their sex. His deep, breathy grunts. His fingers leaving bruises. “Fuck, Negan! Right there…” A sobbing cry left her. “Right there, baby, right-” She couldn’t speak any more.

Her climax hit, hard and merciless, taking her breath away. Her walls clenching around him, her clit pulsing under her fingers. Negan chuckled in smug satisfaction.

“Holy shit…” She sprawled slack on the table, struggling to regain her breath. Every cell in her body was flooded with warmth, a firefly glow. Wetness oozed down her thighs. Negan was still grinding away, his breath laboured…he was only a few thrusts away from flooding her further. “Negan…” she said, through her heavy breaths. “Stop.”

“I’m almost there, babe,” He grunted. “…just…a little longer.”

She reached back and shoved at his thigh. “I said stop!”

He grunted again, a slight whine squeaking through his teeth. His thrusts slowed slightly, but he still wasn’t stopping. She clenched a fist and punched him in the hip. “Get off me, Negan! NOW!”

“Fuckin’ fine!” He yelped, and she was left empty on the table as he jolted backwards. She turned to see his face torn between annoyance and desperation.

“You did come in here to fuck with me,” he whined accusingly. “…and I’m so stupid I fell for it-”

“Yeah, you’re stupid,” she said, “but don’t pout just yet, you big fucking baby.”

“I don’t have time for this…” He reached down to grip himself, but she slapped his hand away.

“Did I say you could touch yourself?” She pulled the bandanna from off her neck. “Put this on. You stay quiet like a good little boy…and ole Sher-Bear will make you feel real good.”

He looked doubtfully at the gag.

She leaned back against the table, running a hand seductively between her breasts. “Put it on, Neegs.”

“It’s all… fucking… spitty.”

She licked her lips. “You want my spit on your dick? Then put the fucking thing on.”

It was a wicked delight to watch him tie the gag around his obnoxious mouth. His eyes followed her movements as she folded her t-shirt on the floor… a nice cushion as she sank to her knees. Her cheek pressed alongside his thigh, a sly look thrown. She wasn’t going to tell him…but he was adorable. His brown eyes wide, his big stupid mouth shut.

If only he could be like this all the time… She chuckled aloud.

“Now, you’re going to listen to me, Negan, or I’m going to leave you here with blue balls. You got me?”

He nodded.

“Touch yourself.”

He closed his big hand around his cock and stroked. Groaning through the gag. His hand picking up speed, his hips rocking into his closed fist. Thumb rubbing under the swollen head, circling the slit, smearing his arousal shiny and wet over the tip.

“Yeah, that’s it.”

He breathed harder through the gag, his eyebrows knitting together. His eyes squeezed shut.

“Stop. Don’t you fucking cum yet.”

She smacked his hand when he didn’t listen. He moaned and reluctantly released himself.

She breathed gently on the head of his dick, watching it twitch. Her hands crept up his inner thighs, then cradled his sack in her hand. “I lied…” she said. “I’m touching your balls.”

He laughed.

She rolled his sack in her hand, gently massaging and his shoulders lifted in a sigh. She leaned forward, sucking one ball into her mouth, her tongue caressing the tender flesh. He sighed again, and she felt him shiver. Her hand pressed his dick to his belly and she trailed her tongue along the underside, until she reached a particular spot. A sensitive little gem where his foreskin connected to his shaft – a spot that drove him fucking crazy. She licked upon it, and he jolted in his boots. The gag was no match for his loud groan.

“Mmmm, yeah.” Her tongue slathered all over his head, then back to that spot. He breathed hard, his hands kneading into her hair. His dick twitched against her lips, the salty taste of his arousal was on her tongue. “You like that, Negan?”

He nodded. Oh, he more than liked it.

She smiled, placing a sweet kiss on his tip. “I got a question for you, Neegs. Did you jerk it thinking about her?”

He shook his head, but she knew that was a lie. She could picture him in the bathroom, bracing one hand against the wall while he stroked himself, thinking about Charlotte’s red hair, thinking about how he had plenty of fluids to douse that 'firecrotch’ of hers!

She frowned, placing a finger on the tip of his dick and moving it in slow circles, his cock moving with it. “Now, now. You know what good boys don’t do, Negan? Good boys…”

She drew her hand back. “Don’t! Tell! Fibs!” Each word was punctuated with a sharp, stinging smack to the head of his cock.

He yelped and stepped away from her. Swiftly, she grabbed hold of his balls. He froze in place, his eyes wide.

He pulled down the corner of the gag. “You…you fuckin’ said you weren’t gonna hurt my balls-”

“I never said that.” She stroked a thumb along his scrotum, still keeping a firm hold. “I said I wouldn’t touch them, and well… I already broke that promise, didn’t I?”

“Sherry-”

“Shut up, and put that thing back on.” She tightened her grip, and he flinched. His fingers touched her wrist, and she hissed. “Get your fucking hands off me, Negan.”

“Bitch, you hurt me and-”

She gripped even harder, and his shoulders cringed, a breathy whine of pain came through his teeth. “Don’t you threaten me. You do what I say and your boys will be just fine. Put the gag on.”

He did.

“Tell me the fucking truth this time. You blow your load thinking about her?”

He nodded.

“Yeah. I knew it! How many times?”

He raised a finger.

“You are full of shit!” She tightened her hand, and he hastily put up two more fingers.

She stood up slowly, still clasping his sack in a tightening grip. Her lips pressed to his chin, and she purred. “You are such a lying motherfucker.”

“Ididnkeepcount-” he spoke through the gag.

“That’s a more honest answer, you goddamn pervert. I almost believe you. Well, you can wrestle little Negan all you want over her… but if you put one finger on that little slut…” She tightened her hand, and he shook his head frantically.

She chuckled and slowly slid back down to her knees, releasing her tight grip on his balls and gently rubbing the affronted flesh. Another chuckle. “Oh Neegs…you love getting your balls busted, don’t you?” His dick was dripping precum like a leaky faucet.

He didn’t answer that one. She touched her tongue to his tip, lapping up the dripping arousal, and pulling away to stretch it between tongue and head. Her green eyes peering up at him. The string broke, splattering wet on her chin. She wiped it away, and dipped her head to take him as deep as she could. Just brushing the threshold of her gag reflex.

He moaned. She couldn’t take his entire length like Shanda, and she rarely tolerated face fuckery the way Nova or Amber did. A hand slid under his tshirt, her fingers curling on his belly. Fuck! His deep groans, muffled… his muscles tensing under her fingers, the gag pulled taut between his perfect teeth. She couldn’t blame Charlotte for trying. Her man was hot as fuck.

She set her hand on his thigh while she bobbed her head, feeling the quivers go through him. He wanted to thrust, she could tell, and his hand was trembling too as he clenched it onto the back of her head. She drew back, cooing, “You’re being such a good, good boy, Neegsy…”

“Mmmmhmmm,” he agreed through the gag.

“You wanna cum so bad, don’t you?”

“Mmmhmm!”

“Heh.” Slowly, she circled her tongue around his head. Kneading his balls in both hands. His muffled sounds were making her throb, and she drew a hand down to curl two fingers into her wetness. They were a poor substitute for his cock, but it felt good anyway. His breathing was getting heavier and heavier. His hips jerking in sporadic, twitchy motions. He was close, and she teased him right to the edge before pulling back. His hand went iron-rigid in her hair, trying to hold her against him, and she gave a sharp, startling nip to his foreskin.

A yelp was muffled into the gag, and his hand sprang away from her. She laughed as she leaned back to catch her breath. “Bad boy!”

“Sowwy,” he mumbled.

She smiled cruelly. “Awww. You were so close, huh? Poor Neegs, he wants to blow his load sooo bad. I wonder how long you would’ve lasted with ole Charlotte in here? Thirty seconds before you were painting her face?”

He scowled, then shuddered as she blew a stream of warm air against his aching cock. “We wouldn’t want to get cum all in that pretty red hair of hers, would we?”

She chuckled as his look of annoyance deepened. She withdrew her fingers from herself, slick from her arousal. Her eyes on his, she sucked them into her mouth.

“Take that gag off,” she whispered as she plied her fingers into her lower lip. “I want to hear you when you blow.”

He pushed the bandanna down. “You better start fucking sucking then…”

“I didn’t say you could talk.” One wet finger trailed feather-light up the underside of his dick, and she scraped her fingernail ever-so-lightly across his frenulum. He shivered, gritting his teeth.

Her other hand was delving between her legs again, her fingers slick and wet and warm, and then feeling their way up the back of his thigh and to his ass.

He yelped as she pressed one finger inside him. “S-s-shit!”

His cock twitched and his ass clenched around her finger. She chuckled. “Oh my.”

“Fuck, that hurt, you goddamn bitch! Maybe warn me next-fucking-time?”

“Ok. I’m warning you.” She grinned evilly, before working another finger in alongside the first. He jumped like a lit firecracker.

“Shit! Dammit, Sherry…oh…ohhh. Fuck!”

Her finger curled inside him, finding that treasured spot, stroking upon his prostate. And her mouth, hot and wet, latching onto his swollen head, tongue flitting against the underside. Her hand gripping him and stroking as she worked her mouth up and down.

“Fuck…fuck yeah…” he moaned. Panting, his head tilting back.

“How’s that feel, big boy?”

“Feels fuckin’ amazing…” He grit his teeth, forcing himself to meet her eyes. “Er… but don’t tell the other girls. Um.. about the fingers in the butt thing and all.”

“Gimmie a break, I know Nova and Shanda have stuck bigger things than a finger in your poop chute.”

His cheeks went red, and she snorted in laughter.

“Just…just suck my dick. I got shit to do.”

She ignored him, thrusting her fingers harder inside him. Her hot breath a tease on the swollen head, which had turned a dark, desperate red.

“C'mon… put that dick in your mouth!”

She merely teased him with light touches of tongue. Little licks and taps here and there. His dick was like granite, the veins standing out rigid. “You wanna cum? You want ole Sher-Bear to suck your balls dry?”

“Uh huh, Sher. I wanna cum.” He grit his teeth. “Please…”

Oh, she loved when he begged. She sucked on his sack, leaving a round stinging mark. He jolted and moaned, and his ass tightened around her thrusting fingers.

“Fuck!”

She narrowed her eyes up at him, her grin devilish. Her lips dragged slowly along the side of his dick. Nipping gently at each rigid vein.

“Sherry, Sher-Bear…c'mon.” He whimpered, and activated his most epic set of puppy-dog eyes, his lip jutting out in a pout. “Please…please…I need your goddamn mouth on me.”

She snickered. He was so pathetic she almost wanted to get up and leave, letting him jerk himself to an unsatisfying end. She pressed a finger hard into his prostate and he shuddered, a whine in his throat. Grinding himself into her fingers, his hips thrusting in weird, sporadic jerks, like he’d get some kind of friction from the very air.

“Oh, big boy is so desperate, isn’t he?” She cradled his cock alongside her cheek. “Ok. Since you asked nicely…”

“Yeah…fuck yeah…” He shuddered and kneaded at her hair as her mouth encased his dick, slurping and bobbing along the hard length. She didn’t protest when he gripped harder, rocking himself into the depths of her mouth. She gagged slightly, drawing back.

“Shit. Sorry…”

She ignored him, swallowing his tip again, her hand pumping his shaft in time to her hard suckling. Driving her fingers more aggressively into him. His moans were raining down on her. If Charlotte was outside, she was surely rooted to the spot, her ears ringing with his ecstasy… the ecstasy Sherry was bringing him.

Negan’s hand tightened in her hair, and she felt his dick getting harder in her mouth. Quickly, she pulled back, leaving his cock quivering in mid-air. He whimpered through panting breaths. “S-Sherry…f-f-fuck…don’t stop…not now!”

She leaned back, stilling her fingers inside him. Her gaze locking on his. He was sweating, his eyes panicked. Locked right on the edge of orgasm, every nerve twinging like a live wire.

“You think that hussy can do you like I do?” She hissed. “You want to run around, fucking every pussy you see?”

He bit his lip, afraid to answer, and she hissed again. “You gonna bring that bitch home?”

“No! I already said I fuckin’ wasn’t!” He tried to wrest her head back to his cock. She jerked her head away and he released her hair.

“No? You gonna fuck her? You gonna bring her in here and hump her dirty little mouth?”

“Fuck no. Look, I ain’t-”

“Tell me, Negan,” she purred. Leaning forward, enclosing her lips softly around his cock head. Tongue flitting over salty, silky smooth skin. Her finger stroking inside him.

He moaned low in his throat, his dick twitching upwards several times.

“Careful, Neegs. You’re gonna cum and it’s not going to be any good…” She smiled, and the motion of her lips made his cock twitch again. His entire body tensed.

“Sherry, please…”

“I want to hear you say it. Tell me. Who’s your number one?”

“You.”

“Louder.”

“You are!”

She pulled his cock up, tapping her tongue on his sensitive underside. He shuddered, his hands clenching and unclenching helplessly, his teeth grit. A whimper squeaking out between his teeth.

“Fuck…fuck…I’m gonna cum…!”

“Who’s your number fucking one, Negan? Who’s the one who makes you cum the best? Huh? That fucking slut…?”

“You, Sherry!” He moaned. “You’re my number one!”

“If I asked, you’d get rid of all of them, wouldn’t you?”

He nodded. “Uh-huh. Yeah!”

“Right…” She snorted and tightened her hand around his base. A tight squeeze. Fitting the silken head into her mouth. And then she bombarded him with fierce pleasure – sharp, smooth strokes to his cock, her mouth caressing him, taking him deep. Her fingers dug into his ass and fucking him relentlessly.

“Fuck!” he cried. He gripped a fistful of hair, his hips rocking feverishly against her face. She let him, let him breach her gag reflex, let him choke her, his sweaty stomach smearing her forehead, his body quivering under her, his scent overwhelming, and then hot, relentless gushes of fluid flooding down her throat.

Tears were running down her face when he stumbled back, her fingers pulled from him. He flopped back-first onto the table in a big, sweaty, panting pile of man.

“Oh s-s-shit!” He gasped. One of his big hands flopped onto his heaving chest. She stood up, her legs quivering. Coughing into her hand, the taste of him in her mouth. Her throat felt a bit sore, but overall, there was a wicked glow all throughout her. Seeing him sprawled out like that, spent and red-faced and his dick turning into a limp noodle… and knowing she was the cause of all that exhaustion?

She stepped forward, running her hand up his thigh, and took hold of his softening cock. Her thumb traced circles on the head, still wet from her mouth. He flinched, his hand pushing on her wrist.

“Fuck! You know it’s too sensitive right now, Sher.”

She grinned, pushing his hand away. “You seem to be mistaken about who owns this dick, Negan.”

He sat up, frowning down at her. Her other hand came up and rubbed at his well-spent balls.

“Who owns it?” She gave a light squeeze, and he grunted.

“Easy on the balls, huh?” He tried to pry her wrist away, but she tightened her grip. “Come on, Sher! You know Tara isn’t going to find any fuckin’ ice out there!”

She laughed. “Fucking answer me!”

“You do, babe. You got my dick thoroughly pussy-whipped.”

“Yeah, that’s right, you scoundrel.”

He started to laugh, and she pressed a finger to his lips. “And don’t you forget that. You remember that when you’re jerking yourself over that red-haired hussy. You remember the woman who’s going to put up with you and your shit. When everyone else would just leave you alone to keep jerking it forever.”

She let go of his junk, and he slid off the table to put himself together. Her tshirt was even more wrinkled than before. She slid it on, pulling up her disheveled skirt and panties. She walked out of the closet knowing she smelled like sex, and knowing the glow was all upon her. She didn’t come out like the old days, furtively peeking and scurrying out of the sight of prying eyes.

“Well… guess I should get back to work.” He looked as well-fucked as she did.

She smirked. “Yeah. Guess so. You coming home tonight?”

“…only if I’m forgiven. I’m fuckin’ forgiven, right?”

“You’re fucking forgiven.”

“See you tonight, then.”

They went their separate ways. Sherry headed back the way she’d came. And as she passed the pipe along the wall, she noticed a quick movement.

Charlotte, hiding back there. Her face as red as her hair.

[green-eyeddragonfanfiction]

Bah, HumBuck! Plan E

Summary: You’re the newest Avenger. Realizing that Bucky plans to spend Christmas alone, you enlist the help of Wanda, your best friend, and Steve, Bucky’s best friend and your mentor. You’re determined to make his Christmas amazing. Plan A Plan B Plans C and D Plan E will work ...right? Pairing: Bucky x Female!Powered!Reader Word Count: ~2,754 Warnings: blood (just a bit), language, fluff A/N: This is for Sam’s Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree Writing Challenge. My prompt was #16, “’This was a terrible plan.’ ‘This was your plan.’” @lovelynemesis *gifs not mine*

Masterlist // Plans C and D // Plans F and G

You chatted in the snow, sipping hot chocolate for a while. At some point you conjured a fire in the center of the group and, although the boys might not admit it, you knew they all appreciated it.

Two hours later the five of you trudged back into the residential building (well, Vision was floating gracefully, but he was always graceful). You were talking to Bucky as you walked. Your plan hadn’t been a complete failure, but it still wasn’t good enough.

Time for Plan E.

“(Y/N)!” Wanda said excitedly, causing you and Bucky to stop walking and turn to look at her.

She was pointing above you, eyes alight with excitement. You looked to where she was pointing and gulped.

There, above you and Bucky, was (unmistakably) a sprig of mistletoe.

You looked at Bucky, who was looking at you like a deer caught in the headlights. Vision must not have noticed the tension or Wanda’s outburst, as he was too busy talking to Steve and bumped into you, knocking you out from under the mistletoe.

“Oh, my apologies, Miss (Y/L/N). I did not-”

“Viz!” Wanda said, exasperated.

He looked from you to Bucky, to Wanda, and then back to Bucky, confused until he looked up.

“Ah, mistletoe. I did not know Mister Stark’s decorators had added it,” he said, bending down to give Bucky a formal peck on the cheek.

When he straightened up, proud smile on his face over his grasp of Christmas traditions, he was met with a blank, soulless stare from Bucky, and a livid one from Wanda. She dragged him away wordlessly.

“I don’t understand. It’s customary to-”

They rounded the corner and you couldn’t hear them anymore, but judging by Wanda’s reaction he was probably getting an earful for his unintentional mistake. You wished she’d go easy on him; it had been a peck on the cheek after all.

To his credit, Bucky seemed mostly unphased. “Well, I’m going back to my room-”

“Wait!” you said quickly. To your surprise Bucky froze and stared at you apprehensively. “I was wondering if we could do a gift exchange? I know you’re not supposed to open presents early, but we have a little bit of time before we have to start making dinner and I used to open one gift on Christmas Eve when I was little and I thought it might be something fun to do. Although of course we don’t have to! I suppose there aren’t a lot of presents to begin with so it might be best to wait until tomorrow so that we have more to open-”

Bucky let out a loud sigh. His face was shadowed, so you couldn’t see his expression all that well. What you could see, however, were the cold steel blue eyes trained on your face. You fidgeted nervously, worried that you’d finally annoyed him too much.

Damnit. If only I’d just kept my mouth shut.

He turned and walked away without saying anything, Steve following closely behind. Steve gave you a small smile as he passed, although you couldn’t return it. You tried, but you just couldn’t make today nice for Bucky. Your gaze fell to the ground and you stood in the hallway, trying to keep it together. You’d tried so hard; why didn’t-

“You coming?” came Bucky’s soft, gravelly voice from the other end of the hall.

You looked up in surprise, gaze falling onto the two super soldiers who stood at the end of the hall, looking at you expectantly. Steve motioned down the hall towards the lounge where the gifts and half-burned Christmas tree awaited.

A broad smile broke out on your face. Perhaps you hadn’t failed, after all.

“Yup!” you said excitedly, practically skipping down the hall.

Steve smiled at your exuberance and Bucky rolled his eyes at you, though you didn’t miss the small, crooked smile that graced his features.

You’d thought that perhaps you should invite Wanda and Vision down for the gift exchange, but the image of Vision kissing Bucky on the cheek and Bucky looking absolutely dead inside changed your mind. Maybe it was best Vision wasn’t around Bucky for a little while.

You dug around the bottom of the tree and pulled out two packages; One for Bucky and one for Steve, both from you.

Steve’s gift had been an expensive but easy choice; A limited edition anniversary box set of the Lord of the Rings movie trilogy. You’d already gotten him the book set for his birthday, so it only seemed natural to follow it up with the movies.

You’d spent a lot of time thinking about Bucky’s gift. What did you get an aloof 100 year old assassin? Your brain went everywhere from guns to 40′s-themed clothing to new tech that he might like. You even thought about getting him a trip to a spa or hot spring. He always seemed so tense that you were sure he’d benefit from an hour-long massage or soak in hot water... but the thought of the Winter Soldier getting a mud mask was just too ridiculous so you settled on something practical.

Half of the time you saw him he was wearing a beaten, threadbare red Henley. You’d known him almost a year and you were pretty sure you could tell someone where all the holes in that shirt were while blindfolded. There was a good chance he had it on now, but if he did it was hidden under his fluffy maroon sweater.

As such, you’d gone to nearly every clothing store you could think of to find a nearly identical replacement, as well as a few others in the same style but in different colors. It was a simple gift, but something you hoped he’d enjoy and appreciate nonetheless.

You handed them their gifts eagerly, excited to see their reactions. “Have at it!” you said excitedly, motioning for them to unwrap their presents as you sat down in front of him on the coffee table.

Steve carefully undid his, meticulously pulling the tape off as he unfolded your neat creases. The second his glimpsed the Lord of the Rings logo, though, you could tell it was difficult for him to continue patiently unwrapping his gift.

Bucky shook his present as he held it up to his ear, as though he was trying to guess what it was. He apparently gave up because he quickly ripped through the paper.

Steve was happily admiring his gift, so enamored he hadn’t even snapped out of his gawking to thank you yet, so you focused on Bucky.

He opened the plain white clothing box slowly, shoving the tissue paper out of the way with his metal fingers.

You were practically vibrating with excitement, edging forward on the edge of the coffee table. A small part of you thought it was silly to get so excited about his reaction to a couple of shirts, but you couldn’t help yourself.

Bucky’s face changed imperceptibly. It was subtle; the hardening of his eyes, the corners of his lips tugging down barely a millimeter, his shoulders tensing as he froze, looking down into the box.

You were good enough at reading his body language by now to know what it all meant. He hated it. Your face fell and your body stilled, looking at him apprehensively.

“What the hell is this?” he asked, gaze flicking up to you. There was a tension in his voice that made your heart plummet to your stomach.

“I... I just thought you might like-”

“Well, you thought wrong,” he said as he shoved the lid roughly back on the box, stood, and dropped it on the couch where he’d been sitting. You could feel your heart shattering. Surely your gift couldn’t have been that offensive? But Bucky stalked down the hallway, shoulders hunched, quietly fuming as he made his way towards his room.

“Bucky... Bucky!” Steve yelled after his friend, disappointment clear in his voice. It was clear he was upset that his friend had stormed off; he was torn between going after him and checking on you. When he turned back to you, though, his mind was made up for him.

He was instantly off of the couch, his gift forgotten on the seat behind him “Hey, sweetheart. Don’t cry,” he said softly, hands hovering over your arms and face, unsure of exactly what to do.

You were crying? Huh. You hadn’t even noticed.

You quickly wiped your tears away and put on a brave smile. “It’s alright!” you said a little too cheerfully for how puffy and watery your eyes were. It was clear Steve wasn’t buying it, so you pressed on. “I’ll just return them and get him a gift card, or something!” you said, willing yourself back into the Christmas spirit. There went Plan E.

“What... What did you get him?” Steve asked, glancing at the plain white box out of the corner of his eye.

You sniffled, your mouth quirking up in a sad half smile. “Oh, nothing too special. You can look, if you want,” you said, motioning to the box dejectedly.

Steve still looked at you with concern, but he picked up the box and shoved the tissue paper out of the way just like Bucky had done.

He froze, just like Bucky had, when he laid his eyes on the gift.

“Uh, (Y/N)...?”

“Mm?” you asked, confused by his reaction. Surely shirts weren’t that confusing? A little bland for a gift, apparently, but-

“Why did you get Bucky a painting of Sam done in the renaissance style for Christmas?” Steve asked, pulling the painting out of the box. Sure enough, Sam Wilson was gazing back at you, immortalized in oil paint on a 10x12 canvas, looking regal in renaissance-era armor.

You stared at it in abject horror.

You’d mixed Bucky’s and Sam’s gifts up.

Your mind ran through what exactly had gone wrong. A loud smack rang out in the room as your palm met your forehead.

“I wrapped both their gifts in clothing boxes! It was convenient because Sam’s portrait happened to fit in one! I wrapped everything at once and I... I must have gotten their gifts confused,” you whispered, hands covering your mouth in shock.

“So... you didn’t get Bucky a painting of Sam for Christmas?” Steve asked. He couldn’t seem to tear his gaze away from the ridiculous piece. When you’d asked him to teach you how to paint, he’d never expected... this. While it was beautifully done and captured Sam’s likeness well... it was just so odd.

“No! Oh god, no wonder he was so upset. Him and Sam hate each other!” you said in despair, Bucky’s reaction suddenly making a lot more sense.

Steve seemed to dwell on that for a moment, brow furrowed as he lost himself in thought.

“I don’t even have his gift... I gave it to Sam before he left for D.C....” you said slowly. You quickly pulled out your phone and sent him a text telling him about the mix up.

Gave you the wrong gift, pal. Give you the right one when you get back?

You expected him to take a while to respond considering the reason, but your phone buzzed before you even had a chance to set it down.

I don’t know, Hotrod. This has my name on it. I might just keep it.

You smirked at that.

You don’t want that gift, Wingman. Unless you want to start dressing like Bucky.

You hit send and only had to wait a few seconds before he responded.

Can I just throw it in the fire?

You rolled your eyes. They were so petty when it came to each other.

No. No, you cannot.

“Everything alright?” Steve asked warily as you tapped away at your phone.

“Yeah, just making sure Bucky’s real gift makes it back to the base in one piece,” you said, once again turning your attention to your phone as it buzzed again.

Fine. But my gift better be damn amazing.

You rolled your eyes and shoved your phone back into your pocket. “Damn... I really messed up,” you said, staring dejectedly at the painting still in Steve’s hands.

He set it gently back into the box and, to your surprise, turned a smile on you. “It’ll be alright. You can go explain what happened to Bucky while I get dinner started,” Steve said reassuringly.

You did a double take at his words. “Wait, what-”

“Go tell him about what happened. He’ll understand. He was just disappointed,” Steve said, patting you on the shoulder as he made his way to the kitchen, leaving you to reel your emotions and thoughts in alone.

Disappointed? Was that reaction warranted for being disappointed about a gift from a coworker or friend? Would he even accept your apology and excuse without his real gift as a peace offering?

You sighed and stood abruptly, pushing those thoughts from your mind. You made a mistake and it was time to own up to it. It was up to Bucky if he’d be reasonable about what happened or not.

You hastily packed the painting away and shoved it under the tree, its plain white surface looking dull compared to the other lavishly wrapped gifts.

You made your way to Bucky’s room. You knew the path so well by then that you barely paid attention to where you were going as your mind wandered and you suddenly found yourself in front of Bucky’s door. You took a deep breath and steeled yourself.

You knocked on his door, your fist a gentle rap against the wood. “Bucky?” you asked hesitantly.

You waited for a moment, but there was no response.

You tried again, knocking louder this time, anxiety lacing your veins. When it became clear he wasn’t going to open his door, you started your bad habit of rambling. “Bucky, it’s me. Uh, (Y/N).” He obviously knows it’s you, dummy. Focus. “I just wanted to say that you got the wrong gift by mistake. You got Sam’s and Sam got yours- I know, stupid. They were in the same type of box and I guess when I was wrapping them I didn’t notice they’d gotten mixed up and-”

Your meandering explanation was cut off as he opened his door. He loomed in the doorway, studying you warily.

“-and I can’t give you your actual gift until Sam gets back. Sorry,” you finished lamely, eyes glued guiltily to the ground.

He didn’t speak right away and you felt his gaze burning holes through you. Finally, “So you didn’t get me a painting of Sam for Christmas?” he asked, causing your head to snap up in alarm.

“No! I got you- mff,” his flesh hand slapped over your mouth before you could get the rest of your sentence out. When you realized you were about to ruin the surprise, your eyes widened in horror.

He raised a single eyebrow at you and- correctly guessing you’d realized your mistake by the look on your face- removed his hand.

“Thanks. And... sorry. Again,” you said sheepishly, shifting nervously from foot to foot.

“It’s alright, Doll. Sorry I acted a fool earlier,” he said quietly, a small, sheepish smile dancing on his lips. Surely you were imagining the warmth in his eyes.

“We’re starting to make dinner, if you want to come help?” you asked quickly, easily flustered under his gaze. You felt your cheeks heat and you hoped he didn’t notice how nervous you were.

“Depends. Is Steve letting you near the ovens again?” he asked playfully.

“I’m never living that down, am I?” you asked as an embarrassed grin worked its way onto your face.

“Never,” he said simply. He stepped out of his room, closing the door gently behind him. “Shall we?” he asked as he tilted his head in the direction of the kitchen.

“Mhm!” you hummed cheerfully. You wished you could be more eloquent around him, but he made your brain turn into a jumbled mess. You blamed his eyes. Or maybe it was his voice. Or the way his soft brown hair framed his face. Or those pouty lips. Or maybe his god-like physique. Maybe his skills? Or his hesitant, kind personality?

You bit back a beleaguered sigh. No, it was just Bucky as a whole. He just... did that to you, and you should have accepted it long ago.

Oh well. Plans F and G were bound to work. You had the entire team helping you this time.

Well... That didn’t go as planned. Plan F and G?

This series is finished, but if you want to be tagged in my other fics, check out this post! Sorry, but responses to this post asking to be tagged will be ignored, so send me an ask or like one of the taglist posts!

☕ Buy Me a Coffee! ☕

[elizabethrobertajones]

13x10 3rd Watch Notes

... I was too excited to do notes, that's all on me :P We're doing this late, fuelled with 3 days of fandom yelling, and a large pot of rooibos tea.

-

I think starting the recap with Jody's line from 9x19 that started this whole thing emotionally is BRILLIANT -

Whatever you want from me, I'll give it. If you want, I'm here.

Because this was the perfectly tuned line to say to Alex to respect her boundaries, respect her journey and where she might go and the choices she had to make about her future and what Jody would do for her... But now it encapsulates the entire heart of this show, because this is Jody laying herself on the line for her girls, for all of them, as the emotional core of the show, the one whose house for "wayward girls" is opening up for business. That she's given the same promise to Patience, and taken in Claire and would probably do the same for Kaia in a flash, even was the one to offer to teach Donna more about hunting at the end of 10x08, though she's adult support.

I think it's 100% the right choice, because Jody is undoubtedly the core of this, and I don't think her adopting Alex was the first time anyone thought she could have a spin off - a hunter sheriff is an ideal idea for refocussing and, honestly, Weekend at Bobby's started to sell the idea in that you could flip around the POV and whether he was in it or not, Jody's perspective on it all was even more fascinating than his. But obviously by 9x19, right in the shadow of the failed spin off attempt, the obvious choice was right there under their noses, and this line sealed the deal, because it gave Jody the chance to prove she was capable of carrying that weight. And boy does she.

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"Wayward girls" said over the clip of Alex and Claire being dragged into their respective jail/child prison cells by the authorities, to show their roots before Jody got to 'em

Patience being offered her route in as the decision she has to make about leaving her life to *become* wayward and go off her seemingly easy path through life.

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"Losing everyone you've ever known" - Claire losing Amelia (holding her like Jody will hold her at the end of the episode), Jody killing Momma - two very very different scenarios, but in both, how they lost their mother/mother figure, one a tragedy, one saving her from the toxic upbringing.

"Am I brave enough/ Am I strong enough?" the music sings over Claire in the taxi in 10x20 going into her future, when we see her last before she settles with iron certainty on becoming a hunter, and then Alex right after she has made her choice, and stabbed Momma with the dead man's blood so that she can be free

"To push away my fear/ To stand where I'm afraid" Patience choosing to leave when her father tells her she won't come back, and Donna seeing her first vampire, and being pulled into the world of the supernatural

"I am through with this" Jody, I think, right after she kills Momma, having struck the decisive blow which changes her life to bring her and Alex together and start this all

Then loud music/chorus and I lose music comprehension and we're recapping and they're all being badass :P

They've done a lot of beheading.

Claire fighting the werewolf in 12x16 edited to not show her getting beaten >.>

To be fair, that's the learning experience where she doesn't make the mistake again this very episode :D

(And she has a lot of mistakes still to make to be formed into a great hunter... She's still 5 years younger than Dean in 1x01!)

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The best bit is how the badass music was for the girls, and it drops away when Jack is on screen and becomes very muted because this is The Man Pain(TM) and therefore not right to play this song for :P All the other dialogue had it at least pumping away in the background.

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And, yep, her first appearance in the recap, she's part of the main plot, not the established sisters (I wondered about this on the first watch but bleh :P) you hear "I've been sacrificed" for Kaia: https://elizabethrobertajones.tumblr.com/post/169929858758/and-all-three-of-kaias-screams-got-punctuated

She's a huuuuge part of the show but I guess that's in a main plot way - the mythology will be built around her and Claire's emotional story is built around that. In a way it elevates her, but it also, for now, excludes her from the core family group, as she's not there in the end for the family meal around the table, and she's not here in the opening credits being layered in with them. I suspect if the show is picked up, we'll have Kaia back by the end of the first season, and she'll be officially welcomed to the family group, but in the meantime as she's *so* new she hasn't got the same connection to the story and history of Jody's family, even that Patience is rooted deep in SPN's story despite being new, and met Jody early on in the season... Staggering their arrivals means that Kaia being able to join the family would be a huge goal to achieve, to round out their numbers and have their first big victory.

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This song is the only way to make that last action of 13x09 any more amped up than it already was.

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And the song ends and we recap Patience on Jody's doorstep and her vision as the lead in to the episode, which, oh no. :(

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I love this opening sequence a ridiculous amount. Quirky one-off werewolves, tiny lil blonde girl representing who Claire used to be right down to the braid in her hair (and she lost her shoe!) and the whole slow approach of the delivery van Claire stole while implementing this extremely extra plan... There's good tension in this whole thing, and the werewolf's knock knock joke made me laugh out loud because I'm awful... Also "don't play with your damn food" ... god.

Claire's knock knock joke is, of course, much better.

I love the way she pulls up and brings light to this place, and sets the monsters on edge before she ever knocks on the door. And the yellow eyes callback! It looks so much like one of the early shots of yellow eyes, maybe the revealing one... If this is the proper opening of the pilot, to compare it to 1x01, we have Claire saving a girl from the yellow-eyed monster... Down on their magnitude of monsters they deal with though. There's no destiny and epic plan that can possibly compete with what the Winchesters get up to, and really, no one wants or needs there to be.

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We've seen a lot of tilted picture frames this season and I don't know if it's because before this season started I photoshopped one straight for silly reasons or if it's because it's an actual theme. It's still symbolic, of the picture being shifted, which might mean you're viewing it wrong, or that the picture itself has changed and moved - which this show is doing both in the main show and this itself being a new and different perspective on the show.

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I love how Mr Werewolf completely unironically says "who's there" after all that stuff scaring the kid without even thinking about how this can bounce back in his face and he's going to get the fright.

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I love Claire's innocent little "Huh?" when he says that, and the gentle music like maybe this was all a misunderstanding.

"Your name's right on the box." He's reduced down to just being a monster, and she's the thing that kills monsters. :D

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I also love that she blows him away before he can say "Bitch"

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And that Claire uses Amanda's full name to greet her and put her at ease, but also that she's taken away Mr Werewolf's name, and given Amanda hers.

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She's so gentle with the little girl :D

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And she has so many weapons shoved in her boots!

I like how this show she can now use her fighting skills to overpower a werewolf despite being smaller, and also that she knows not to let them get the drop on her, and reads Amanda's face well when honestly it's a trope not to realise why the person you think you're freeing looks like that and get surprised again.

I also like it was a lady werewolf who attacks at the end - it's not JUST a girlpower, men are dumb brutes message, just that these girls are very strong in their own ways and that is a good thing to celebrate. You can still get lil girls who get kidnapped, innocent civilian moms, and werewolf ladies. Before you even hit the range of girls and women in the main characters.

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The sad moment where she reunites a family and wishes for a moment it would be that simple for her... And at the end she is given a whole large family to emotionally reunite with - or join for the first time :D

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And then the rehash of the "hunting trip and haven't been home for a few days" line, and title card. I think a lot has already been written about what's different, like that it's Jody calling Claire home, and taking her off the road. And she's the parental figure - which may just reflect back on what Dean was to Sam I guess :P Except that she's also just friends with Sam n Dean, and this is also a front to get Claire home, because she's more concerned about Patience's vision and Claire dying than she is about Sam and Dean, concerning as that is. She doesn't know any of the ways in which they could even remotely currently be fucked, as she last checked in with them at the start of 13x09 and they last checked in with her after getting the lead on Kaia. Obviously Dean had some motives that he didn't want to be alone and didn't REALLY need Sam, he just wanted to have him around, but, yeah, this is entirely for Claire's sake. There isn't so much mytharc as there is intensely personal, heart-based reasons for things :')

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How many episodes start with showing Jody's truck... I love the shot of Claire in the mirror as she pulls into the driveway, just kind of... staring at Jody's truck and wondering if she's doing the right thing coming home, like she's already facing down Jody after leaving. Like it only becomes real in that moment at the end of the drive.

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It kills me that Alex and Jody are around a 6-person table. I already pointed out in the rewatch notes for the earlier stuff that Jody's living room has room for 6, but you know me and table meta. There's 6 seats around this table, and one of them is for Kaia, though she never makes it to sit with them. At the moment, it's just Alex and Jody, and all the rest are going to join in around them :D

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Thinking of: Claire comes in, smiles nervously at them all, breaks the tension asking Alex if she missed her and getting some snark in, and Jody hugs Claire waaay more than normal, her face over her shoulder betraying absolute relief, before she gets back to business and introduces Patience. Claire's face falls, recognising all the hallmarks of being replaced - and Patience brought like 2 shirts with her or something, so has been borrowing Claire's old clothes because Jody probably said it was okay (Patience seems like she would have asked :P) and here's Claire, and... Yeah, I don't think all of Claire's initial reaction is just because she doesn't believe in visions or whatever, but because she feels like Patience is an impostor. And a rival.

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I love Patience's last look after Claire abruptly changes the subject on the awkward silence and charges off - "well, that went... about as terribly as it could have" :P

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Patience sitting next to Jody on the sofa probably can't help either >.> Jody's like a protective barrier between her and Claire - and Alex to an extent, just because they're not on the same side.

I LOVE Claire slapping away Alex's hand and Alex's teasing look when she says "baby". She's soooo much more confident than we've ever seen her before, and she's happy to tease, and to get deep without falling into her own trauma and not being able to get back out. In 11x12 she was still very hurt, and had only just made it to the surface of coping every day. In this episode she's clearly much more settled and happy and feels a sense of belonging and purpose. She'd not even consider staying to hunt just because Claire needles her it's the right thing to do, and I love that Alex has a job helping and healing people, after being indirectly responsible for so much death. Of course when there's serious work to do and Jody needs her that beats everything, but she is so confident about what she's doing.

Also just the detail that she's the one who does antiseptic cream because anyone can theoretically do that but it's showing Alex's place as the qualified healer in the group. Based on how she gets deep with Claire AND Patience, I think that she may be a secondary emotional healer too, for stuff that's not really a "Mom" problem for Jody.

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Claire says, "What about the girl?" *pause* "Kaia" trying the name out of size in her mouth for the first time, saying it weirdly soft and carefully... :')

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And then we cut to Kaia being discovered just as Claire says her name. And that shot introducing her by her hand - that she will die with her hand outstretched to Claire... Oh no....

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Alex checking Jody will be okay without her before she leaves - it makes Claire suspicious because the tone is suggesting emotionally, not manpower. Jody's holding off having the conversation with Claire and Alex knows it, and says she knew how Claire would react in the next scene with them... She's got all their numbers

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And Claire immediately challenges Jody to tell her, all bravado, and when she says she's safe, Jody cracks and you can hear it in her voice - distress that Jody does not often show as she says "No you're not!" and finally explains what Patience saw.

Having to tell someone you saw them die is a great intro >.> I mean, definitely worse than it turning out you stole their sweater :P

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Claire laughs it off but then her face falls as no one turns it into a joke, and she's clearly starting to wonder by the time Jody leans in and insists Patience is the real deal

Claire immediately goes to the bargaining stage, and then denial, followed by anger and turning it into the ongoing argument about being allowed to hunt and how Jody has been stifling her and not allowing her to hunt. It's the same argument as 11x12, and though we saw in 13x03 Jody stoically trying to accept Claire's decision in her comments on her leaving, now we see that the argument has never really gone away, but they haven't been tested by anything huge enough until now to work through it

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Oh Claire... Talking about not having enough time to plan and how it's good to go charging in if people need saving. And saying she won't end up dead... Alllll the irony for later :(

Jody accuses her of running away, and off Claire goes.

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Patience watching all this from the sofa like... I'm... sorry...? Oh god this is awkward.

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Alex being competent :D (Also a good thing to establish if she's going to have to keep ditching her job for monster autopsies and letting Claire hang around checking the system :P)

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Snark snark snark, A+ dynamic between Claire and Alex - I'm glad we see all the different levels of how well they know each other, like Alex and Patience being comfortable but not close, Claire barely knowing Patience, Claire REALLY getting on with Kaia, and of course Claire and Alex having a several years old relationship where they've warmed up to each other but still need to maintain a snarky exterior.

And like with Claire coming in the door, there's a moment where it seems like Claire's anxiously waiting on Alex's approval, and is relieved when the snark comes which reassures her that they're good and she hasn't overstepped (especially as she had been needling her, and Claire's been away from home for months).

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"And I knew how you'd react"

*pause*

*deflection to snarking at her some more*

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And then they get really deep about what Jody means to them and what she needs from them and who has been there for her... I don't think Alex meant it that way and she immediately knows she implied Claire left them, but Claire does take it that way, and starts explaining how she felt, about why she couldn't stay yet... And Alex points out that Jody *always* worries about her, whether she's there or not. Which stops Claire short because it comes across as such a weighty declaration - the betrayal of Jody's feelings of not being able to stop worrying about Claire no matter where she is, being so much deeper than just fussing about Claire not getting killed on her watch, which can be taken as regular over-protectiveness, especially when Jody is a hunter and sheriff so protecting people is her day-to-day... Even though Claire has started to think of Jody as her mom, she's so used to being abandoned I guess it might be hard for her to accept people still care about her when she's not around, and that she's not better off elsewhere not getting in the way, and preempting abandonment.

And Alex changes the subject, and Claire looks at her fondly for doing that, and humouring her to help with the hunt.

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Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee Claire looking at Kaia!!!

The MOMENT they did that eye thing with the close up staring I had to pause and squeal the first time because while I'd been looking forward to them interacting, I had NOT expected it to be blatantly signposted that they were about to form the most intense relationship of the episode after Claire and Jody's arc. Like, I'd added up that Claire was the main character, Kaia was plot relevant, and we see them in the promo shots in 3 separate scenes talking alone that we knew of plus they appeared to be in the Bad Place alone together so I figured they were going to spend some time building up this relationship but hoooly crap they went for it.

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Claire and Kaia both play it cool for the nurse, then leap into action.

From Kaia's POV Claire might be an unusually young detective, or some sort of monster or angel... Perhaps it works best if we assume Kaia's still worried about being kidnapped by angels, for most dramatic irony, that Claire, a former angel vessel herself, wanders in like hey there and Kaia is assuming yet another angel is coming for her.

Claire wanders in like "where are you going" and though she grins at her, taken in that light it's very threatening... But then she starts talking about Kaia having the cops on her ass, which is the last thing Kaia would be worrying about.

"Who are you?" she asks, realising that Claire may not be an angel after all.

"I'm a friend of Sam and Dean Winchester" - that should be the all access card but she has no idea that Dean abducted Kaia at gunpoint and this is the worst way to make her trust Claire. But seeing that she's human, Kaia makes her escape.

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Kaia's reaction to being confronted by one of these monsters in the real world, not in her dreams where "at least" they can stay if she doesn't sleep, is brilliant. Of course she'd freeze in horror... As much as she's used to running away from them, they're not supposed to BE here.

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I love Claire's BAMF confidence to just pull a knife and charge the thing - though of course a light stabbing doesn't do much and she gets thrown. It takes teamwork with Jody to bring it down for her to get a good stab at it, so though she gets the kill it has to be a team effort, aka you need back up, you can't rush in and do things on your own, Claire. And who knows how things would have gone if Jody hadn't come to the hospital - I guess because Alex called her and said Claire had been by and found Kaia?

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"So let's talk" It's much more confrontational than how Claire then goes and talks to Kaia. I suppose because at that point she's still running away, but somewhere between all this getting the monster in a body bag, cleaning up, getting it home, letting Kaia get dressed in something other than a hospital gown, Claire's seen she's just terrified and running, but not trouble herself... I mean, Kaia agreed to come with them, and is sitting quietly on the porch.

Idk why they are sitting out in front of the house when monsters are possibly after them :P

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Patience like yeeep I'm not ready for this when they unwrap their monster. Alex so casual, like, okay, we're doing this...

Being raised by vampires probably does a number on your squeamishness. And since this is all technically for good rather than harming people, Alex has no issues with it at all.

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Eeeeeeee Dreamhunter conversation!!

We've already picked over it so much >.>

Claire comes walking in all confident and opening up about the monsters - because she swaggers into every conversation, fight etc when she thinks she has the upper hand. Kaia is ready to open up, since Claire saved her, and explains what she can about the monsters and her dreams.

And then Claire assumes that Kaia is a hunter of sorts, who deals with these monsters like a BAMF - "so you fight them?" "No, I run" *Claire stares at her in horror, as it sinks in just how much Kaia must be scared and how she's been running from monsters every time she dreams* "Sometimes they catch me," Kaia admits because when we compare this to the scene in last episode with the awful group leader at the rehab place, she can't tell the truth to anyone, but now Claire knows all about monsters and so the truth is not going to make Kaia look crazy...

"Is that how you got that?" Claire asks, spotting the scar, still sizing up exactly what is happening to Kaia, and Kaia admits she has other scars all over. At this point she's clearly moved to trusting Claire and being relieved to unload a bit, even if she won't look at her, yet.

Claire sees how upset this makes Kaia, the first notes of a gentle song start in the background to show we're now bonding, and she immediately leaps to trying to make it all okay - to show her that scars are trophies and to be celebrated surviving these things. "Me too," she says, unknowingly echoing the catchphrase of the last few months, since this episode pre-dates it. Taken in this context though, and the whole author is dead thing, it's a powerful statement because in 13x09 Kaia's interactions with men and monsters were all entitlement and even Jack was grabby hands and not knowing boundaries, and Dean in his fit of panic about Mary, threatened her with a gun and lost sight of her as a person - just wanted to use her for her powers, which is a blatant metaphor. Claire got bitten by a werewolf in 12x16 in an assault-coded attack, and in her earliest episodes back on the show had a lot of blatant near-misses, terror of nighttime attacks and the sketchy caravan people thing, and now when we meet her again she's blasting away werewolves who terrorise little girls, and overcoming the old adversary. And wearing her scars with pride and no shame. And encourages Kaia to feel the same way, after being harassed by the monsters of her dark consciousness who've left their marks all over her.

Claire approaches this all with her reckless enthusiasm that makes her such a great lil Dean mirror (but also all her own self for all her other traits) - "Ghoul bite" she says like it's the coolest thing ever, and immediately Kaia is smiling to see Claire open up and show her that she's not alone or damaged in a way that will make people think less of her - because Claire at least will think it's awesome. "Bar fight with a vampire... he threw me through a window." She smiles completely pleased with herself for having lived such a badass life already. That she's got these stories to tell. Kaia is captivated by now, wanting to know more about Claire, what other stories she's got written on her body.

Claire smiles and meets her eyes and looks away, bashful.

"And this one?" Kaia reaches right into Claire's space and brushes a finger over her forehead.

(Personal space? Never heard of it :P)

It's set up as an accident (though of course it's all a writing decision) in order to make Claire get off her guard and admit she's not as cool as she makes herself sound sometimes, and not all her scars are real heroic battles. And it makes Kaia laugh, getting to see beyond Claire's facade. Which, of course, is the big old Dean Winchester parallel and she's been doing it all along, pretending one thing even when it's blatantly obvious it's not. She's got better at it as she gets older, but Kaia still gets past that layer :D

They share a few glances and giggles, and then having got through enough of Kaia's layers to establish trust and a sense of being comfortable together, Claire tries again, asking, "Kaia, what happened?" in the most gentle voice ever - because she's learned to reach out to other people now, and how to judge when's the time to ask without demanding.

And though Kaia looks scared, now we know she'll talk.

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There's a green AND red cooler behind Patience :D

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This monster has such a cool and disgusting design. I'm completely with Patience about not being able to look at it :P Alex is still wearing her scrubs from the hospital, completely professional.

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I pointed out in a post while doing the rewatch that Alex and Claire were both wearing black and white vertical stripes and then that Patience showed up wearing them too (Claire's sweater) - I think this is the only scene you can tell, but Kaia has a sweater too and it's got black and RED stripes, the only one of them to break the pattern, and, sadly, because she's marked for death :(

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I love how Kaia says "it's where that came from" and gestures the monster with an eyebrow alone. Good acting.

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Patience's "ugh" face too. She is so the audience stand in here, the normal kid who has to stand in the room with a monster autopsy all of a sudden and it's not even a big deal to anyone else here in a "what the fuck this can happen!?!?" kind of way :P

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Kaia lurks on the other side of the door as she explains, while Claire has moved into the room to watch the autopsy - Kaia's even talking about doors to other worlds while she explains. She looks so small and separated from them. Probably more foreshadowing she'll end up separated from them... "Something went wrong"

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God that monster is disgusting. A+ design.

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Claire's little smile as she realises she has a chance to save Sam and Dean. "The door's still open!"

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20 minutes in and we see Sam n Dean enjoying roast lizard.

"It's a lizard. It tastes like a lizard" is quite possibly the best line Dean's ever had on the show.

I've seen a spectacular lack of irony about how Sam and Dean don't need saving because they've survived this long and lol they're just camping in the woods, like the very same writers who then let Bad Place Kaia overwhelm them in a fight didn't let them sit down and roast an iguana. Like Sam and Dean are their own living entities who managed to survive this long in the woods without supervision, and like the eye of Sauron turning on them, once the writers are dealing with their lives again, everything goes to shit and the girlpower takes over.

So to be brief: Sam and Dean are used for the dramatic irony in Kaia's comment which has been a theme all season that they say Mom is dead, Cas is dead, what's burned stays dead, and we hop over to see Mary alive, or Cas waking up in the Empty. In this case, Kaia's been persecuted by the Bad Place with an intent, because Bad!Kaia is after her for some reason, and won't let her go (which is probably why she overloaded when she tried to leave the Bad Place via non-waking up means with Jack's help - Bad!Kaia looms up in her vision and stops her from going), and Sam and Dean were just chucked here. Bad!Kaia is probably stalking them the whole time waiting for an opening but she absolutely is not bothering them like she's had it in for her alternate self, I suppose seeing them as a curiosity and probable dinner for her big friend.

They've survived this long because they're not important.

They've survived this long because they're competent at being flung into the woods with nothing to their name, because we've seen them do it before - literally last midseason opener had the same concept :P

But they're not surviving as a fuck you to Kaia's presumption they're dead, and they're not living entities with any ability to shape the story to their favour to prove a point :P Sheesh...

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Anyway Sam refuses to eat his lizard because it's gross and he has hope that they can escape - it parallels the start of the season, that Sam has hope, that he's holding on to change their circumstances. Dean is wallowing in the idea that they're going to be stuck, that hope has probably petered out and the portal closed, and he he has to adapt and resign himself to their fate. That no one knows how to get here, that MAYBE Jack might find a way back to them but who knows what happened there - they don't so all they can do is walk and survive and at least get used enough to this situation to eat a lizard and not go hungry and lose strength over nothing.

And Sam's denial, of food, and that hope is over, is not healthy for him, though it bears out, if anything it enforces his beliefs - and there is NOTHING wrong with hope but spreading yourself thin, not eating, not living for yourself in the meantime... They need to combine their approaches, to mix hope with self-care.

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Ugh, what a nasty looking spear :(

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Patience, 100% grossed out by the monster autopsy, has decided that she has done her part and she really doesn't need to be here to oversee nonsense like this :P

Alex immediately finds her, and sees what's up.

"Is that what you want?" she asks, sounding surprised. Given Patience told her that "maybe my dad will take me back" it's clear Alex knows pretty much everything we know about Patience, that she walked out on her dad in order to deliver the message. She'd also know, then, how determined Patience was to do it, and how important it was to her to get to Jody and pass on the warning. Patience hasn't seen any action but at the very least she's bonded to seeing through the story connected to her vision. Alex understands that Patience has made a personal sacrifice for this, and that asking her dad to take her back is going to have more connotations than just going home because it all got a bit too ikky - it's putting visions behind her, putting this whole thing behind her, and wanting to be normal again. And Alex, as I said, seems to have everyone's number :P

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(She used to be very good at picking out marks >.>)

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She snarks that Patience will pretend she's "Little miss perfect and not a powerful psychic" like Patience can't do both. I mean come on, give her a chance, she's got an in built perfectionist streak that's going to end up applied to hunting just as hard as it was applied to school, just watch if we get a show :P But yeah, no, the connotation is to go home and just do exams and try to be normal. The message coming from Alex is blatantly obvious, as we've been seeing from the start - the Alex of 9x19 and then the Alex of 11x12 are both gone, and instead we have an Alex who found her balance, and a true motivation.

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"Well, you gotta bury 'em somewhere." Honestly at this point this is when I realised Alex is the secret weapon to this whole project because she's extremely funny and because she's got dark dark humour, and that dark dark history, and that doesn't go away, she just channels it into being this domestic, loving healer type who's got a dark streak miles deep.

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In any case, Patience needs to do the whole "refusing the call" thing a few times because she has a main character arc of her own which we frustratingly don't get to see the end results of because the vision that took her here and ended the episode with coming true wrong, is a huge development for her, but we're gonna need the show to find out how it affected her. I mean it's great to leave it all hanging but graaaarrrr I neeeed it nooowww

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The story, of course, has different ideas. Patience, it says, you're one of us, you're a main character here! So rather than let her go, it gives her a vision to make her immediately have a dramatic concern to protect them, and so she comes running back and of course she has the perfect getaway vehicle in her massive car...

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I would LOVE to know what Claire and Kaia were talking about downstairs together, but I think it's also just nice to know they chose to sit close together and talk when we weren't looking at them, that they bonded closer... Because of course this is something that Berens has helped write before - the mixtape scene is the prime example of showing that there's a whole iceberg under the surface of DeanCas interaction and that they know each other better than we will ever know them, because they get all that time when they're not on screen having adventures to get to know each other, if the story will let them. And clearly it does, because Dean made Cas a mixtape.

Anyways, Claire and Kaia, who have a gentle, flirty dynamic, spent at least 10-20 minutes talking in private :')

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Claire is prone to looking at Patience's lips too. Oops. I guess she's just surrounded by cute girls so what to do??

She and Patience have the vision as the core conflict, that Patience feels Claire blew off her vision and she accuses her that she came here to save her and Claire just wants to fight monsters... And Kaia is the one who intervenes in the fight and convinces Claire to be rational and go. I LOVE the angry stare-off between Claire and Patience though - that Patience thinks that Claire thinks she's a fake, when Claire's a lil freaked out and putting on a lot of bravado about it.

And the camera going between them, to Kaia who reaches in and pulls Claire out of defying Patience for more bravado.

But also that in the wider narrative this episode is set up around Patience's vision and her misinterpreting it as being about Claire dying - but it's Kaia, and that teaches Claire to have less bravado, to rely on the others and to have her "army" as she thinks of them, of support to plan and help and work as a team.

For now, Kaia's intervention is enough to soften her, just as her overall meaning to Claire will soften her :(

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Kaia's face as she watches the monsters smash up the house. Claire's as she has to accept this is really happening and Patience was right - which means her vision about Claire will happen...

Patience just annoyed no one will listen to her

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TIME FOR D-TRAIN

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I love how Patience even thinks for a moment the National Guard might help in a monster situation.

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Donna gets the best entrance this episode. Sorry Claire :P

Now she's here they really get to work. Donna gets out her weapons to badass music, drops the hilarious Minnesota line, and Jody calls Kaia aside to work out where they're supposed to go to find that door.

-

With the help of Alex beating Sam Winchester in a game of wifi tag

-

Getting in another reaction shot of Patience on "who knows howta use a flamethrower?" was genius.

-

Jody's resigned look as she revs up for another stay back and wait speech - wheedling Claire. She looks over and sees they're all watching her, wondering what Jody is asking her perhaps, or knowing it. Kaia is in the foreground, and Jody says "Kaia and the girls" and I watched and giffed waaaay too recently for my Dean n Cas are in love gif series, 5x04 where Dean says to 2009!Dean that he's going to feed all his friends into the meat grinder - Cas too??

I think Jody thinks of Alex and Patience more as the girls under her protection because they have a pre-existing relationship, even if Patience's is newer, while Kaia is still basically unknown to her. But that just implies further that Kaia is under Claire's protection instead, already. Before Claire says anything.

I cry a lot about them already :P

And Jody's surprise when Claire gives in with only a glance over at Kaia because she was expecting the fight. She's smart enough not to throw that back at Claire and turn it into a victory or demand to know what changed.

-

Sam belatedly seeming to think they're in a different universe, not a different world - and the fact they HAVE that distinction in the first place... I think it may just be settling in how far from home they are, and how difficult it will be to get back.

Again, Dean concerned with the practicalities, cleaning his boots, grumbling, accepting that this is pretty much their life now while Sam is still philosophising and coming to terms with it.

-

Bad!Kaia has some serious moves :D Just thinking of the spear connection, when they fought Ramiel they got the better of him. But she's small and fast and has clearly learned to fight from the very start and the spear is a natural extension of herself. It's not some big showy fight, she's small and strong and wants them knocked out and on the floor.

-

Donna knowing they found the right place because the Impala is parked outside of it. Perfect :D

This is all she does this episode except for driving the Winchesters home - just telling Jody and Donna where to go.

-

And they march on in like the competent badasses they are :D

-

The weirdness of what they're walking into slowly sinks in as they pass the melted angel blade - Jody knows what one is from 12x06, where she would be more like the average hunters who, like Asa, think of it as so special to keep back and put in a felt-lined box. She's never seen wingprints before either. And then there's the glow of the portal from upstairs...

-

Claire sits in silent contemplation, and Kaia takes it as her chance to come reassure Claire, since Claire sat with her and made her feel better last night. Claire smiles to herself before she moves over, happy to see her. And Kaia watches her closely, leaning around to catch Claire's expression, so she can diagnose that Claire is scared...

Here we get to the most important lines for Claire as a Dean mirror - the thing Dean's been grappling with for years and Berens had a whole section about in 12x22 where Dean talked about how they might die, when they thought they were facing their end in the suffocating Bunker. Claire sees her end, and expresses it the same way Dean does - she wanted to go down swinging, doing something heroic and good that would mean she lived a good life. Something to prove to herself, in death, that she had saved herself :( I mean, Dean's faced this a lot, in season 3, in season 10 especially. But Claire is young and has only ever really known the swagger of being a hunter, tempered by mistakes and losses, but nothing that could set her back more than her drive to do it.

-

I think Kaia sees her as a real hero because of the way she saved her, because of the way she talks about her life, and seeing her as confronting that she wanted to die heroically, knowing that this is how Claire feels, that she's all in for being a swaggering hero if she could be...

-

Stuff like "get myself killed" and "sit back and let Jody handle it" remind us how young Claire is, and how Jody still fills a motherly role in protecting her. Though Claire is now presumably legally an adult with no more coming of age milestones or will be very soon (she must be coming up on 21 if her birthday is towards the end of a season) this is like the last hurdle to adulthood - learning to be responsible and for Jody to trust her with her own life, a struggle that goes both ways between them and sadly eats up Kaia in the learning of it >.>

-

"But Sam and Dean saved my life and I *can't* sit this one out" - Claire carries on talking and starts to talk herself into it. Kaia listening, sees where Claire's heart is, and though she has no love lost for Sam and Dean, sees what they mean to Claire - that at the very least she has them to thank for ever meeting Claire, who saved her life, so that passes on... And so she appeals to Claire's hero side, knowing it will be what Claire needs. And that for Claire she would do just about anything. She'd go with her into the Bad Place, if that is where Claire needed to go.

-

God I wish they had kissed at that moment :P The camera cuts away and we go to Jody and Donna's badass scene with the monsters.

-

"Ooofta."

Donna seeing something cosmically huge for the first time, and finding proof that hunting is not just the ghosts and vampires that come through the towns you look after, but sometimes on a scale unimaginable to the daily life of a sheriff...

Jody knows too but she also knows this is where she has to go so off she charges - And when Donna pulls her back she's still staring at the portal with a finality, and certaintly. And fear. Gosh she's good at this whole thing :'D

"I'm going in," she says, firmly, the next shot showing her less scared and more resolute. "If I don't, she will. Donna, I cannot lose another child." And then she turns and gives the spooked Donna that sad, almost farewell smile, because she doesn't know she can come back from this and I suppose she trusts Donna to be her back up here, to stop Claire going in after her, or to come with her and help...

Who knows because the monsters shake them out of it, and they have to check it out. Perhaps she was going to leave Jody behind but she just can't while while there are monsters there. Her instinct is not to rush in, and it's to protect everyone around her, and that ultimately saves her from rushing in and doing a Claire, and getting Donna killed.

But it still gets them to a dead end hiding in the car, without back up of all the girls.

(Wow all the Jody scenes are so powerful... Kim Rhodes just fills the screen all the time and I love her. An incredible amount.)

-

Mislabelling - Dean calls "Darth Dickwad" "he" when talking about the dinner bell which I think also some of the less well-inclined towards this episode peeps have taken as gospel truth, that the thing in the hood was some other creature, male the whole time until it revealed itself with Kaia's face like a shapeshifter, instead of just being her the whole time. (She's had boobs the whole time, it's not a good theory but if you want a man to be the only one strong enough to take out other men in a fight, sure :P)

But in meta terms, the label being wrong is a long long theme, and Dean misunderstanding the hooded figure's gender because he's making this assumption too or just isn't objectifying her figure where it's visible through the robes and just assuming that slim and strong means a small but very dangerous guy... Who knows :P He's not really had a good look at her.

It would be SO easy to write "she" and not think about this concept or have Jensen mis-say "she" knowing it's Yadi or a female double on set so the "He" has to be very deliberately said and written. That there is a meta point to Dean being wrong, and again with the labelling.

-

I like how Claire's like, "Patience, gimme your keys" - not can you drive us to this spot, but I wanna do some illegally fast stunt driving to get us there on time and this isn't a debate :P I guess just her being a leader in attitude as well.

-

I just love this badass set up of Jody and Donna in the car together, mirroring 11x04, but in a badass fight scene, while Sam and Dean took the pose to be a time to talk about feelings. Perfect.

-

Donna just says "alrighty then," not sentiments, and then the monsters start clambering on the car and they're shooting.

-

Jody's FACE when she sees the girls with the flamethrower.

Honestly the fact Claire took the flamethrower off... And no one picked it up??? Pfft.

-

Claire and Jody go through a silent exchange of their argument as Claire realises it's the portal, and bolts towards it, Jody chasing after her.

-

Patience and Alex standing there like... should we be doing something about this?? And the monsters???

-

"Oh hell," Jody says, seeing Claire has found the portal and is already sizing it up, getting ready to walk into it. And it's getting smaller, meaning that it's now or never. And there's no time for any more arguments about it. Claire saved her life and it's not like a weird barter system or anything but maybe she can trust Claire... it's almost like in the new star wars where Leia tells Poe off for always jumping in an x-wing and blowing things up without thinking but then when an emergency comes, the response is, yes jump in an x-wing and blow something up :P

That arc was more strongly focussed on his leadership but tbh Claire and Poe maybe share a personality type. She'd be one hell of a pilot.

-

ANYWAY Just avoiding talking about Jody having to let Claire go into the portal and saying "I know" and giving her that little wink, like, I love you but it's your life and I can't stop you, and maybe we need someone to swagger in like the big hero and just get it done, and I'm so incredibly proud that you have this instinct to do the big hero stuff...

... Ohhh this is all hurting soooo much because of how it ends :(

There's just so much power in Jody's looks, you can SEE how much she loves Claire and how much she doesn't want her to go but she knows she has to.

-

Broken up with Donna's "oh there he is! Hiya buddy!" because in the opening we see Donna's reaction to seeing a vampire for the first time of total horror, but now she's adapted, it's no different to growing up in a hunting culture in Minnesota... Sure the things are weirder, but it's cross-applicable skills :')

She may talk down to the monsters to make them seem less scary for the girls, but when there's tons, and she knows the odds, she doesn't make a grand stand, she tells the girls to run and covers their escape.

"Little help!?" she calls as casually as she can up the stairs, while probably Patience shrieks "HELP"

-

This distracts Jody from her moment with Claire is already looking to the portal again, resolved to go.

She looks to Jody for final approval and Jody does that amazing little nod and "Go" because to her they already resolved it and they're wasting time - or at least that's what she wants to convey to Claire while her eyes shine with tears and she watches with utterly restrained sadness and fear.

-

Claire nods, and looks over at Kaia, who just looks freaked out

Because she's agreed to go to The Bad Place, and oh boy that's all hitting home right now

"I'll protect you," Claire says, full of confidence that she can do this, and holding out her hand, and they Legend of Korra their way into the rift... But this is the beginning of a painful story, not the end of one, and so Claire leads and Kaia follows. The music kicks up a bit of intensity with a guitar riff as they take hands, and through they go.

On the other side, Claire immediately scopes out the portal to check they have a way back, while asking if Kaia is okay, in full hunter mode. Kaia grabs at Claire's arms to find her hand again, and pulls her towards the sound of the monsters, towards her nightmares, resolved to do this.

-

Meanwhile: some fun throwing around of furniture, Alex shooting like she's at a shooting range, Patience shrieking some more

-

Claire saves the boys. "My hero" Dean says, recognising the give and take of saving lives that they do in this industry. Owing one to Claure is something to process later but they're going to have to think of her as an adult and fellow hunter now.

-

She's a year off how old Sam was in season 1.

-

They sort of don't even question how Claire is here - she came with Kaia and they were vaguely local to Jody when it all went down and that's enough to bridge the gap at least for getting the hell out of here and assuming they're not hallucinating :P

-

Sam still has to ask about Jack, though. Of course. Kaia shrugs and says he must be at the other place because, well, he was trying to get there. And whether she can see it or not - if she has some impression from when she was screaming and melting all the angels or what...

Good enough for now, monster is coming :P

-

I LOVE DONNA REASSURING PATIENCE THAT SHE GOT THIS

"let's get to work"

Not "we've got work to do" but recognising they're already hard at it, recontextualising an iconic show line less to be about expectations of work later and more to just getting down and doing things :P

-

WHY DID THEY STOP FOR A LINE UP AT THE PORTAL JUST RUN THROUGH IT IT'S OKAY IT'S DEFINITELY THE RIGHT PORTAL

JUST GO FULL TILT INTO IT AND BE DONE WITH THE BAD PLACE

-

Kaia hearing Bad!Kaia coming - or sensing her. She has great reflexes to shove Claire out the way - or some connection to her Bad Place Self... And I wonder at what Bad!Kaia was trying to do - if she wanted to kill Claire, or if she knew Kaia would jump in front of the spear.

-

Anyway OW OH NO KAIA OH NO OH NO OH NO

This sucks but I'm taking it all on the chin on the absolute understanding that we're getting Kaia back if we get this show and the story hasn't even begun yet and that Kaia is going to be so utterly central to it this is only the beginning for her character and she's going to emerge like a beautiful butterfly from this lil set back, and no one stays permanently dead, especially not when they're introduced with a romance and then their evil double seemingly pops up before the end credits :P

-

Anyway in her last moments Kaia struggles to look at Claire, and grasps for her hand, squeezing it so tight she compresses Claire's fingers, and Claire is just stunned, whispering "Kaia" to round off how she first said her name at the beginning of the episode when she had no idea what it would mean to her in the next 24 hours.

Claire can hardly look away as Kaia dies, despite the sound of the approaching monster.

-

That's a big boy.

I wonder what Donna would say to him :P

-

Claire goes in a full snarling rage to attack the hooded figure, and is restrained and pulled back

-

Patience gets in a great shot which knocks back a single monster that was running straight at her, after a few hilariously bad shots

Her look of stunned horror is such a hilarious part of this episode. We need more newbie hunters who aren't just like, victim of the week or whatever, they're press-ganged into the life and it's like what the heeeell why am I dooooing this?? :P

Well I mean we could have a whole first season of her figuring it out XD everyone seems so gung-ho to be a hunter or get protected and stay back. She's not just a random civilian defending herself, she's literally grappling with if this is her life or not and all signs point to yes despite how horrifying she finds it :P

-

Aaaand they come back through the portal and it closes and Claire wails the most anguished "Noooooooooo!!"

And that's when Patience comes in with the others and realises Claire isn't even hurt - but a part of her just died

-

Jody silently asking Sam what happened - is Kaia okay? And he just shakes his head.

SILENT COMMUNICATION. Love it. Love that I still get an itty bitty fix of Jam in the middle of all this :P

Sam is still up for communicating with Jody - Dean's just looking on in sympathetic sadness to what Claire is going through.

-

The back and forth between Claire in agony and Kaia lying dead on the ground just drives home what Patience is realising - that she misread everything and it was Claire in mourning and Kaia's death that she saw, but the details not giving her enough context to realise it wasn't what it seemed.

-

And, yeah, Jody holding Claire like Claire held Amelia when she died - ouchies :(

But Jody soothing Claire... oh my heart. Jody has gone through about 1000 different emotions this episode and it's been AMAZING. If anyone thinks the girls can't act then Jody would still carry it for them.

-

Sam and Dean respectfully wearing black as the girls get on with cleaning up the house. Blah blah people covered Dean saying "i" and Sam pointing out how shut down Claire was as a parallel to how Dean was at the start of this season - so much about grief and loss this year, again.

Jody's got a lot of mixed blessings - Claire is back but broken, her house is smashed up but she has a lot of new hands to help her fix it. And they saved Sam n Dean but there may still be a whole bunch of monsters around town for them to deal with.

-

What a great sentiment to define this show's place in the mythos: "We will handle it. C'mon, you guys take care of the world! We got Sioux Falls covered." Showing they have a place, respecting Sam n Dean's importance to the greater narrative, but also defining the show as having no huge mytharc because you can't compete with Sam n Dean on the cosmic level, but you can have a personal level mytharc - something like Bad Place Kaia and the emotional drama that would bring - to still have high stakes and high personal meaning for it all... And we're invested in all these characters, the ones we've known forever because we've known them forever and seen them grow into this, the new ones because of their potential and what they will bring to the dynamics of the show...

-

And Sam and Dean love Jody so much and she waves goodbye to them and sends them back to the main story, and sighs and goes to see how Claire is doing.

-

Still crying in her/Patience's room (they need to settle that :P)

"You were right," she says because this whole episode was stacked against her over-confidence, to bring her down to have a more careful approach to hunting, to sadly learn a lesson that was building all the time we knew her as an aspiring hunter. Carelessness is an interesting flaw, and over-confidence, and I don't want to see them disappear from Claire - and judging by the end monologue they haven't, she's just reapplying them and learning to be a little less hasty, a little more reliant on teamwork... But yeah, I think Claire is an interesting mess, and she's so young and started so young on the show we've seen every single one of her traumas collect together to make who she is.

(And Kaia is owed like a billion times the character development off of Claire's pain if they get the show so that she can have it paid back for dying like this for Claire's >.>)

-

"I said I'd protect her," she says, her voice breaking and a tear coming out of her eye - c'mon, people really think Kathryn can't act? She's breaking my heart :P Bringing it back to Kaia and that's when it makes Claire cry, to think of her promise to Kaia, that Kaia took the stray bullet for her (... and the spin off had better subvert the heck out of that trope >.>) and Claire failed to protect her like she'd thought she could.

Having had someone to protect - and losing someone - makes her finally understand Jody, and she mentions the feeling of losing someone you can't protect, that you felt that much love for whether it's a kid or your first crush that really seemed like it might be something real and good for you...

-

And I mentioned riiight at the top, that Claire never got the speech from Jody that she gave Alex and Patience, because we saw Claire being sent off to Jody without hearing Jody make her any promises. So it's like, Jody finally has an in to reach out to Claire and for Claire to listen, the equivalent of the end of 9x19 or 13x03 for Alex and Patience. "You don't have to do this alone" - which is also the message of the show, that they're a family, that they're not alone when all the family work together.

"When you're ready, if you want, we're all here for you." And that's Jody's final invitation for Claire to stay for real.

-

One last humour beat with Donna, Alex and Patience, who are definitely going to be the most fun characters in any combination or all of those 3 :D

Alex giving her a "Welcome to the family" is a lighter version of the heartfelt stuff Jody just said to Claire - extending an invitation to the newbie to the dynamic that she's passed their bonding ritual of fighting side by side and she's no longer just an awkward house guest, but one of them.

-

Jody comes in and stops to survey them, perhaps giving an uncertain verdict on if they're keeping Claire.

Maybe just to ask them what takeout they want. She probably told them she was gonna go talk to Claire, though, so they're all wondering about her.

-

Claire continues her hunter journal, now writing from the heart, starting a new page of her life.

Coming downstairs to join the family.

there's 4 chairs that survived the attack on the house - which the established family (Alex, Jody, Patience and Donna) are sitting in, and a folding chair set out for Claire if she wants it, and a different coloured plate (actually, Patience, the other newbie to the settled family dynamic in Sioux Falls since Claire left, has a green plate too, but a real chair). And the 6th chair is just gone. Kaia is not currently a part of this family set up, but the space remains for her.

-

Claire monologues basically stuff to that effect - she's staying because they're going to get strong, and fight her chosen battle. She thinks. She mentions "family" "army" and "need" which in the SPN language has a lot of mixed connotations - family is good, army is a bit uncertain about if you're using them for the right reasons, and "need" has a lot of back and forth about if it's good or bad, to use people or to be incomplete without them, for good or bad. In this context it all for now comes across as a very positive message of unity and strength between them all, but idk if it's healthy long-term for Claire based on the critique to these words in the main show, or if she's escaping to a world governed by Jody's heart, where these things might be less dramatic and painful :P

-

"They think I'm staying because I'm broken" I guess it's pretty open among them all how wrecked Claire is about Kaia - they all know there was something special or that something about it hit Claire very hard and maybe they can think it was losing someone she swore to protect in battle, especially sacrificing herself for Claire, or maybe one or the other of them has gleaned how Claire's heart was broken too.

-

I love the last glad look Jody gives Claire, happy to see she's come down to join them. The others are chatting without particularly directed eye contact as they pass around the food as a symbolic thing of unity.

-

"The thing that killed Kaia is still out there" she says as we see the now familiar opening of a portal.

"I don't care if I have to tear another hole in the universe" - I think this phrasing is particularly ominous given season 13 as a whole with the AU hopping and Billie's warning about AU hopping as knocking over the whole cosmic house of cards. Even without what happens in this show, in the main show we still have Jack in the AU with Mary, and some drama with Michael sure to still unfold. And I'm really starting to worry that this is all still a red herring for the real problems, caused by universe hopping. The phrase "tear another hole" is so violent, and she's got Winchester determination to do it at any cost which is reflecting back on them, not just in general but even just last episode they were at an any costs struggle to get to Mary including tearing holes in the universe when they were told not to.

And finally the dramatic irony - Claire looks into the camera and says "we're going to find it and I'm going to kill it" and "it" pulls back the hood to reveal she's been Bad Place Kaia all along, and now she's here with an agenda...

Which goes with, as I was saying earlier, all the dramatic irony through all of season 13 about alternate universes and not knowing the state of things, misinterpretations, mislabelling and generally getting things very very wrong, when we know better. We are allowed to see there's still hope for Kaia in the long run and that Claire's mission is so VERY much more complicated than she thinks it is. One thing is certain - she is NOT going to accomplish this goal and we know it as soon as Bad!Kaia pulls back her hood :P

-

NOW GIVE US THIS SHOW SO WE CAN SEE WHAT HAPPENS NEEEEXT

[lbkingofcards]

My Final Card Design and Development (The Front):

When going into my final design, I already had a rough sketched design that I could use from my previously created cards. The reason behind the card change that I was getting tunnel vision. I could not see past my previous design until I asked some friends what they thought of it. Once I had received their feedback I realised that my work was far from finished. The main points I got were that it was too complex and over the top for a playing card. This was a big reality check for me because I thought my original design was flawless. This is why in-situ feedback is insanely important as it helped me avoid a poor outcome.

Where it started:

I used my previous card design as a base to rebuild my card. The three main things that I carried from this card to my new card were: 1. The Typeface 2. The Pips 3. The Royalty definers. 

It was hard to let this original design go because I had already put so much time and effort into it. I was a huge fan of the gradient and bright colours, but they had to go. One tool I used more than I thought I would is the ruler tool. These markings where absolutely essential when trying to make the card symmetrical and even. One drawback to these lines is that they had a huge impact on the general speed of Photoshop. It began to get fairly awkward to perform small tasks without lagging out Photoshop.

Once I knew which details I would be taking forward, I decided to make a mind map to help visualise the design. This mind map contained many different topics and styles. To me, mind mapping is one of the best forms of Idea generation and movement.

To commence my playing cards I started off with the debatably most important step of anything in design. This was the colour palette. I of course wanted to use the ‘Cosmic Latte’ colour as this what I based a majority the mood board off of.

I hard to create the foundation to build my card onto. I started with the whole card as one colour, however I soon saw how bland and flat this looked. This made me turn to the gradient tool. At first I was happy with this outcome, but after rotating the canvas to see how it effected playability I soon realised that the difference in colour at each end of the card was too dramatic and could provide an unfair advantage.

I tried playing around with the gradient tool until I found out about the angled pre-sets: 

This formed this symmetrical stripe along the card using two different shades of Cosmic Latte and beige. I was much happier with this result. The next step from here was to start editing the texture of this background to add some depth. I used Photoshop’s in-built stylise function to add the ‘Oil Paint’ effect to the entire background. As I had used this effect before I knew that it created a ‘paper-like’ feel to the document, which is exactly what I wanted.

Although it is barely visible when far away from the card, I believe that it adds a much needed layer. The little details make all of the biggest differences.

From here, I wanted to start work on the borders and fonts. As I was using a previous font I did not have to spend ages scouring through the font websites to find one that would resonate with the card/ theme. The font had to be sharp and bold, while also being easily viable and not too overpowering. 

I found this font on dafont.com and it ticked all of the criteria's. It was the perfect balance. The sharpness adds a degree of class and elegance to the card.

Picking a colour for the font and detailing was easy. I have been really appreciating earth tones recently, especially in these dark, wintery times. Brown is a great earthy tone that combines with beige well. It may sound weird but this colour scheme feels almost homely to me. It is a welcoming palette and works well in any environment. It was hard to decide whether to keep the letters in all capitals, or to break it down into capital and lowercase. The end product features all of the letters as capitals as I feel the uniform height and width of every letter supports the contours of this card much better than the lowercase would.

I used the guides to help line up these letters in their perfect corresponding place on the card. Symmetry is a very important feature on playing cards in my eyes.

The next problem to tackle was where to put the pips. I wanted to keep this minimal and a playing card that I previously researched had the perfect solution. I was going to place a large, singular pip in the centre of the card, so that it was easy to see and did not obstruct the playability.

I was a big fan of how this looked, although I wanted a way to make this pip stand out a bit more from the background. I did this by duplicating the pip layer, removing the style, and making it black.

This result really excited me as it looks much better than I could’ve wanted. I love how these pips reflect what is underneath them. However, I soon realised that this method was flawed as it did not differentiate which colour the card was. This would have huge implications on playability and general use of the card.

To counter this, I changed the bottom pip to red using the paint bucket tool. This created this amazing gemstone style design, while also solving my issue of differentiation.

The next step was to find a way to show that it was a royalty card. I wanted to keep this along the theme of minimal, while also keeping it symmetrical. I used the designs I made previously within Illustrator as my template.

I applied the same style to these templates to create the same chrome effect as the pip. The next thing to do was to duplicate the layer and change it to red to support the rest of the design.

This really helped me see how well the red worked with the beige colour palette, as it was now more dominant.

At this point I thought I was finished, so I sent it to a few friends to receive their input and verdict on my card. This is where I was helped massively, as an outsiders opinion is very beneficial in design. The main things they pointed out was that it wasn’t very easy to tell what the suit was. With this in mind I added a couple of small pips in the corners. This was a silly mistake on my end as I should have incorporated these from the beginning.

The final piece of input I received was to make the edges look less plain and to fill the space in a minimal way. I did this by adding a box around the card, this was inspired by traditional playing cards. This was done using the rectangle tool. I chose the rectangle to have no fill, and a stroke which was the same colour as the rest of the text.

I erased the rectangle where it met the text and pips to make sure it did not overlap anything and make it look untidy. One last thing I did to this rectangle was to add a white outer glow to add a minimal reflection of Kidmograph’s line work. This small addition helped to balance the tone difference between the brown line and beige card.

Overall I am very pleased with how this card turned out. I feel like I managed to portray my minimal design style and clean palette well. One slight problem I have with this card is that it is not for everyone. Although it looks clean and simple, many people might see this as lazy and unoriginal design, especially people that are very fond of traditional illustrative cards. I personally think this deck suits the 21st Century as it looks elegant and clean.

I created the rest of these cards in exactly the same way, however I changed the colours and shapes of the centre and outside pips. I also changed the colours of the royalty marks based off of which colour that suit is.

[shadowtsukiyo]

LadyNoir July: Prompt: Foggy Amortentia

LadyNoir

Rated: T

Prompt: Foggy

LadyNoir July

Amortentia

I redid this thing so many times. So… so many times. I wasn’t happy with any version for this one. I couldn’t figure what I wanted, and my original idea was thrown out because it was far too much editing for me on my busy schedule and my friend for this one.

So… here’s attempt…six, I think?

“So, I like Adrien… but I barely know him.” Marinette started, “This other guy I know, he likes me. A lot. He’s willing to work around all of my faults and insecurities, and he deals with me being a show off when we play video games.”

Alya looked at her friend, “This guy, you’ve met him playing video games, right?”

“Mhm.” She hummed the best she could. She didn’t like lying to her, but it was the best she could do. “He’s our age, and kind of funny—not that I’ll ever tell him that—he’s cute… beyond all of that… he’s… my best friend, next to you, of course.”

“Girl, as much as I want you and Adrien together, I want you happy more. If this guy does that, then go for it. You seem like you really care about him, that you love him.” Alya slung her arm over Marinette’s shoulders. “So, tell me. Do you stutter around him too?”

Marinette laughed, “No way! He’s too silly to really be uncomfortable around… he makes me too happy without me feeling weird.”

Alya had a slight grin on her face, “There you go, sweetie.” She encouraged. “Hey, wanna go in here, maybe get some chocolates for your new beau?

“Sure, that sounds—ALYA Move!!” She saw the Akuma pointing something at Alya and suddenly in a blue flash, the red head was hit. Her eyes glazing over with a bright shade of pink, looking like sclera, the pupils showing darker under the magic.

Marinette bit her lower lip, she didn’t want to run away, but she needed to transform. “I’m sorry, Alya.”

Marinette ran into the nearest alley she could, “Marinette, shouldn't you wait for Chat?” Tikki questioned as she opened the purse.

“I know I should, but I need save Alya… Tikki, spots on!”

If she had known what would have happened, she would have waited.

Less then five minutes, the blue magic was thrown her way and she had no way of escaping.

Everything was fuzzy and foggy, like she just opened her eyes under water. Nothing made sense at first.

“Come to me, Ladybug…” A voice called to her.

“Chat…?” Her consciousness was confused, why did he call her Ladybug.

As her body approached him, she realized this person wasn’t her Chaton. She couldn't make out his features, just a must of blurring colors. Muddled brown where his hair should be, coppery glimmers on the brown when the light hit it. Soft mocha blurred with white and tan, his face and eyes. They weren't Chat’s bright green and golden locks.

Everything in her screamed to stop moving.

“Don't fight me Ladybug. I will be taking these,” a hand brushed after earlobe making her inwardly shudder in disgust. “after you take Chat's ring.”

“No…” She whimpered in her head, for her body only nodded, allowing him to wrap an arm around her.

Everything was too hazy to see, too foggy. It reminded her of the cheesy horror movies she watched with her Papa.

Every now and then, her vision would clear up around a person… Alya, Rose, and several other girls. Most of which she didn’t know their names.

She could hear their inward cries and pleas. It made Marinette realize, this wasn’t just her mind. The Akuma dumped their conscious minds in a space.

“Ladybug…?” Alya’s voice filled the foggy space. Terror filled her voice.

“N-no… no no… you’re supposed to save us…” A brunette was practically in tears.

“We’ll be okay, Chat will stop this.” Ladybug’s voice was firm, despite the terror that filled her.  While she believed in Chat, she was scared. This Akuma had control over her body.

The male was speaking… he wanted a girlfriend, now he could make any girl his girlfriend, to stay by his side.

It felt like hours.

“If he kisses me again, I’m going to go Lady Wifi on his ass. I’ll let Hawkmoth akumatize me.” Alya was sitting crossed legs. Her head tilted back in annoyance.

The male had what he wanted, girlfriends that played what he wanted. They were lifeless shells filled with magic, obeying his every command.

As the time passed, more and more women began joining them in the hazy, fog ridden world.

“I wish Juleka was here. She usually had playing cards.” Rose sighed, laying on her back, the fog half covering her form.

“Can we even use objects here?” Ladybug asked, turning to see Rose was gone. “What??”

A moment later, the blonde came back, her breath was heavy. “I was back in my body! If only for a second!”

A smirk formed on Ladybug’s lips. “He’s taking too many of us for him to control… He’s losing us. We need to—.”

She was cut off, and for the first time since being hit by the magic of the Akuma, she saw clear and perfect, no haze trying to hide people or face, able to see clearly in every aspect.

“What’s the matter, Minou? Jealous?” She heard her voice, but it wasn’t her. It wasn’t her!

“Chat…” She said him, her hand trembled, trying to reach out towards him.

And she was yanked back into the fog, this time… only partly. She could feel her body, feel her hand trying to move. It wasn’t just here, everyone seemed to be in a similar situation. They looked like they were glitching in and out… It seemed that Chat was causing the Akuma’s frustration levels to rise.

‘Aren’t you going to answer my lady?”

She practically snarled hearing Amortentia calling her that, “You son of a b—!”

“Don’t you call her that!” Chat’s voice and the sound of something being hit. It was a very sudden yank, but her consciousness was back in her body, and from the looks of it, so were the others.

The back and forth was making her feel like her yoyo.

Hit him Ladybug!

The command entered her mind, sand her body began acting on the order. “Chat, move!”

Her fist moved, and she felt fear in her heart, soon the fear turned to cool relief when he moved out of the way.

To her surprise, he twisted and yanked her to him. His arm locking around her, holding her close. Hands pushed and hit at his chest, but the longer she was in his hold, the weaker each strike became.

“Don’t let me go, Chat…. Don’t ever let me go.” She wanted to verbalize the words, wanted to show him so much. She just wasn’t ready, and this wasn’t the time nor place… but this event set her heart on a straight path. To Chat.

GET HIM OFF OF YOU!

“I’m going to try to break his hold on you, M’lady. Do you know where the Akuma is…?”

NOW LADYBUG! GET HIM OFF! FIGHT HIM!

Her head was growing thick and fuzzy, “G-Glasses… His glasses…”

She watched as his lips parted to say something else, but it was too late.

“Ladybug, shove him off!” This order was out loud. The internal commands were not working as well as the Akuma wished.

“No! No… I don’t want to hurt him. Chat, move… don’t let me hurt you!”

Her hands roughly collided with his chest, her weight being forced into the thrust of her palms. As Ladybug, her strength was higher, and from the grunt he let out—it hurt.

Fight him! Get his miraculous!

She was no longer in the hazy world, and from what she saw, Alya and a couple other girls were fighting as hard as she was. Rose, sadly was still influenced, as were some other girls that stood by his side.

“N-no!” She panted, forcing her body to stay ridged as Chat pounced on him.

She felt like every muscle was weighed down, like the air was thick and wet, like even blinking hurt.

And suddenly, it stopped.

A black butterfly filled her vision as every muscle went slack, and her body began running on auto-pilot. Throwing her yoyo to purify it, summoning a Lucky Charm, cleansing all the damage done.

Chat had sent her away, and she had left, but only to recharge. Tikki had been worried, and Alya blew up her phone with worry.

She had a decision to make, and she was tired of avoiding it.

“Ladybug? I thought I sent you home for the night.” He was on his way home, using their usual meet place as a turn point.

“You did. But I needed to say something.”

Her hands shook at her side, remembering everything.

That fog and haze she felt hadn’t been the first time she felt that way, it was just the first time it had been caused to such a degree.

“You…”

“I… what?” He tilted his head and she grumbled.

Why the hell was he so cute when she was trying to keep herself from stuttering.

“You, mangy cat, shush!”

This earned a light grin from the male.

Her hands threw up into the air. “You make my life clear, okay! Happy, and clear. Without you, it feels wrong…. And… and…”

He was wide eyed as her frustrated confession.

“I’m lost without you, Chat.”

Blue clashed with green before she moved to step closer until she was hugging him. “My life without you is just a fog… a haze. Like what that Akuma did.” She whispered as his arms wrapped around her.

“M’lady… what are you trying to say?”

“I….” Her words were lost on her tongue as she gently cupped his cheeks. “Soon… I have some personal feelings to figure out. But… I’m…”

She paused and he moved to gently tilt her head up.

“Yours, Chat. I’m yours.”