#i wouldn't sleep for a week but it'd be so worth it

[420faggyactivities69]

Okay I can't find it but there was this one post about someone secretly feeding you in your sleep and it's honestly all I've been thinking about for the past couple of days

Just imagine having someone who lives with you, a partner or even just a roommate, showing a funnel in your mouth every night while you sleep and just pumping you full of some fattening substance, maybe they'd put something in it to make you sleep hard so you don't wake up.

Over the course of the night you'd have thousands of calories pumped into you, stretching out your stomach to make sure that next time you can handle even more. Every morning you'd wake up swollen and bloated, confused as to why that is, because you haven't eaten since dinner, right? You'd brush it off and go get a breakfast anyway because it's the most important meal of the day after all, you can't miss it. And you'd go about your day as normal, eating and snacking as you always would.

That's why it'd surprise you when one day you'd find it impossible to button your pants. You'd admit that you have gained weight and try to work it off, watching what you eat, exercise, all of that.... But you wouldn't know that a certain someone is feeding you a week's worth of calories just in one night.

You'd furiously try to loose the weight, but it would just keep piling on. What once was a small pudgy belly has grown into a big soft wobbling gut. Every part of you would be covered in lard and none of your clothes would fit you anymore.

After some time you'd just give up, if you can't loose the weight no matter what you do then what's the point of dieting. So you'd give into your hedonistic urges and eat whatever your belly desires. Except your stomach would be so stretched out by that point that you just can't feel satisfied unless you gorge like a feral starved animal.

Maybe one day you'd find the funnel that was used on you all this time and instead of questioning it, you'd immediately use it yourself.

And maybe the person who was behind this the whole time would end up catching you with the funnel, while you're guzzling down pure slop and playing with your massive jiggling belly

[pixie-ass]

Don't Say You Need Me - Jonathan Crane Drabble

Warnings - none except refrenced non consented ghost hands

— ˗ˋ ୨୧ ˊ˗ —

It'd been almost 2 weeks since she'd last heard from the man she loved. Last time she'd seen him he'd been the one to reach out, look for her until he found her, to tell her he missed her and needed her back. Like always she believed him, blurred by the rose lens of love. He'd been there for a while, not long but a little longer than usual until one morning he'd left, with nothing but a few words of how he needed to leave and couldn't explain it to her. 

Here she was now, laying in her bed, a comforter covering her from head to toe as she stared out her apartment window into the gloomy streets of Gotham. The tv was playing in the background, the news reporter buzzing about more criminal attacks of people dying from a gas poison. She could care less, a villain could come into her apartment now and strip her of everything but she wouldn't care, her heart had been ripped out again. 

The moon was bright in the sky, but clouds would come and cover it again, leaving her in darkness again. 

It was late into the night, but she couldn't sleep.

Flipping over, she looked at her small clock, 2:37, it read. It's been days since she'd gotten good rest even if all she did was rot in bed. 

She hasn't always been this way, she'd been with many men before, but none of them had made her so sad to lose like Jonathan had. She'd been strong, never shedding a tear for any of them, telling herself they weren't worth it. But then came the doctor, with his charming good looks and stoic personality. 

Lost in thought she once again stared into nothing in particular, lost in thoughts that kept coming. Her phone lit up, she zoned into it. She was getting a phone call. Sitting up, she picked it up, the caller ID was unknown. 

Furrowing her brows she answered, "Hello?"

"Y/n, hello. It's Jonathan."

Silence filled the room, her heart leaped in her chest, from happiness, excitement, pure bliss. It was like the color had returned into her life once again. She was happy to hear his voice again, like a drug it lured her in and had her addicted everytime.

"My love, where have you been? I've been worried sick." She inhaled shakily, the news of his voice making her happiness overpowering, "Oh, i've missed you so much, Jonathan.." she whispered. She was now sitting up completely, the first movements she'd done in a while.

"I've been busy here at Arkham, you know how my job is. Lunatic after lunatic. You wouldn't believe how many crazies are in this city." His voice sounded the same, yet she could suspect a different hint of tone from his usual annoyed one, it sounded darker, but she couldn't put her finger on it. She decided she was imagining it, from her lack of sleep and time since she last heard him.

She let out a giggle, "Yeah, I'm sure, I've seen the news. There's a new criminal they call the Scarecrow, spraying victims with a fear gas. Another crazy you'll be seeing soon, huh?" There was a noise in the call as if a shift in fabric, "Perhaps if he's caught. I've seen him around the media, his techniques are quite intelligent though, the police haven't caught him, not even the infamous Batman." There was a snarkiness in his voice, his annoyed tone had returned, his tone almost sounded insulted at her comment.

She wondered why, then another question popped up, "Why did you call me until now, Jon?" She was now frowning, looking down at her knees, her heart aching in fear of what he would say. 

"Ah yes, I called you because I wanted to see you, my darling." Her frown lifted, a smile replacing it as she bit her lip happily. 

"I've been wanting to see you more than anything. When did you want to meet up?"

"I'm outside your apartment complex, if now is fine." Jolting up she looked outside her window, seeing him walk into the doors of the complex, her heart raced as she looked at herself.

She looked a bit messy from laying in bed, "Oh, um, yes now is fine. Let me just clean up a bit. Just knock when you're here please." He gave a quick response, as she hung up. She wasn't sure what he needed but now her nerves were getting to her as she replaced the lounge clothes she wore with actual clothes. Slipping on a small black skirt and sweater, she tidied up her hair as she heard a knock. 

Opening the door, she smiled widely, there stood the man she'd yearned for, dressed in his usual suit. "Jonathan…" She embraced him in a tight hug around the neck, holding onto him like he'd disappear into thin air again, "I've missed you so so much." She exhaled into his neck. He placed a hand on her waist, he'd never been much of a physical person. Stepping back, she stared into his face, smile never leaving as she motioned him to come in. He did so, she noticed he was carrying a suitcase with him, she assumed he'd just got out from Arkham. 

"Good to see you too, darling. I needed to see you again." He spoke, setting down his suitcase on the kitchen table. Her heart fluttered at his words, he did seem a bit different. 

He sat down at one of the tables and she accompanied him in doing so. Staring at him, she noticed he carried himself with a new demeanor, she didn't speak until he spoke up first, "I'm sorry I left so abruptly. I had an emergency to see to. You know I love and need you, my darling." 

She nodded, smiling as she grabbed his hand in hers. "I know, my love. Don't worry. I'll always be here for you, I love you more than anything."

Jonathan was pleased to hear this, he gave a smile in return. He knew when he picked her long ago she'd be perfect. No matter how many times he'd left, for months or longer, she accepted him with open arms. He wasn't interested in love or such things but that didn't mean he wasn't good at faking it, he was a master at manipulation and psychological abuse, he was only using what he knew. 

"My darling, since you love me so much, would you do anything I told you?" He leaned over, running a hand through her hair lovingly, then moving to her cheek as he caressed it with his thumb. They both equally knew she would, she nodded, placing her hand on top of his as she leaned into his cool touch, bathing in the feel of it. 

"Of course, my love." 

"Good." He responded, leaning into her and placing a slow kiss onto her lips. She melted into it instantly, closing her eyes and taking in the feeling she missed so much. His lips were warm and he was perfect as always. 

A small click was heard, but she ignored it, too infatuated with the man's lips to acknowledge or care. That was until a smell filled her nose, his lips had pulled away by now and she began coughing, opening her eyes she saw smoke and Jonathan had been replaced by a terrifying frowning scarecrow. She let out a scream that was quickly broken by another fit of coughs as she stood up, stepping backwards to get away. 

A gruesome voice now filled her head and the room around her was becoming distorted, the lights flickering and dark voids and bugs crawling everywhere. "Oh my darling, having trouble?" The voices seemed to be mocking, she couldn't see him clearly now, only a terrifying dark shadowy figure slowly making its way towards her. She felt hands touching her all over. Falling backwards her body made harsh contact with the floor, she continued to scream, now crying, "Please… please stop, no no no.." she closed her eyes but that only seemed to make it worse as more terrifying images appeared.

"Your pretty little mind can only take so much. Shhh succumb to the fear! Come on my darling, let it all out. Let me see your biggest fears." The voice was tormenting, filling her whole head as she cried harder, the feeling of hands getting more painful on her body. She tried to rub them off frantically, but the feeling only worsened, she felt like she was suffocating. Opening her eyes the scarecrow was face to face with her, distorting and moving into terrifying faces straight from a nightmare. 

"Make it stop, make it stop please!" Her words were coming out slurred, whines and whimpers being all that Johnathan heard. She was trying to crawl away, but not to much success. Jonathan could see it was affecting her greatly, he was pleased, a sinister smirk on his face as he ripped the mask off. She was showing to be a great sport, her fear was much more extravagant than he had imagined. He had used a lower dose on her to test it out, but she showed great promise in his future experiments. 

Cooing at her, he caressed her face again, her eyes widened in fear as she was paralyzed in place unable to writhe away. Her eyes then closed suddenly as her body went limp, her brain must have exhausted from the high levels of fear.  "You're okay now, Dr. Crane will take care of you for being such a good girl." 

[zippidi-dooda]

1 - Chance Encounter

It was quiet for now.

Your son was still fast asleep in your bedroom leaving you a chance to relax. He was adorable but such a handful despite being one boy. Always running off without warning.

"What am I going to do with you?" You smiled. Leaning against the door frame, you watched the dark haired boy sleep for a moment. 

He looked so peaceful right now; his e/c eyes finally shut, drool dripping from his mouth, his chest falling and rising steadily. It calmed you. 

You did all you could to keep him out of trouble and so far he was still safe.

But there was a few close calls. 

You decided it'd be easier for you to raise him and protect him by living far from the kingdom. Away from the place he lived.

Which is why you lived here.

Deep in the woods in a formerly abandoned cabin.

It had only been about a week since you'd arrived here and you had been able to spruce up the place. The once dingy, cobwebbed house was thoroughly cleaned and dusted, the leaky ceiling mostly repaired, the doors all replaced, and the wild critters kicked out.

You had yet to repair the furniture but it has, so far, given you no problem using so you'd be fine continuing to use it until you got around to the task.

It had taken you a long time, and a lot of bribing, to get this far out, unannounced, with your son. Your son, Lucas, didn't enjoy the traveling at all and made it very clear. But it was worth every second.

You doubted anyone else would get this close to the Valley of Thorns.

You certainly wouldn't if you weren't in your situation.

But you were, so you did. And you had yet to meet any beastly beings since getting here. Perhaps all the awful stories you heard about the place were wrong.

Then again, you weren't actually in the Valley so maybe that was why you were undisturbed.

Whatever the case, you and your son were finally free.

You walked towards the kitchen, the floor creaking as you went (you'd need to fix that soon) and got started on dinner.

You had few rations left now and had already begun growing a garden outside, but it'd take a while for anything to grow. Meaning you'd need to scavenge for food soon.

Or trek into the Valley of Thorns and hope no one would be hostile towards an outsider like you and sell you something.

You didn't know if your money had value here, so going there may not be beneficial.

You shook your head. It'd be best to worry about it when the time came.

So you pulled up your sleeves, tied your hair back, started up the fireplace, and began preping something from the cured meats and vegetables you had.

It wasn't long before you heard a low, mellow voice call from behind you.

"Who are you?"

You flinched, spinning around quickly to face a strange man standing by the front door. 

The first thing you noticed was the pair of dark horns sitting atop his head.

Your heart began to race. "You're . . ."

You knew exactly who he was.

He was tall, his horned head almost hitting the roof of the house. His skin was pale as porcelain, eyes lime green and almost glowing. Pointed ears peeked out from his long pitch black hair which faded to a deep blue at the tips.

He wore black clothes which covered his body entirely, no amount of skin other than his face and neck showing. 

He was . . . "Gorgeous."

His thin brows raised in shock and he continued to stare at you for a moment. Then he let out a laugh. It was deep and alluring. Fitting for an heir to the throne.

"I must say I dont hear that very often. How unexpected. Although you still haven't answered my question, Child of Man."

Your eyes flitted towards the bedroom for a second before you focused your attention back on the man.

"It's quite rude to ask a lady her name before stating your own."

His eyes narrowed but he continued to smile. "Quite so. But seeing as you've come here unannounced I say different manners come to play here."

"I'm unannounced?" You turned towards the counter, reached for the knife, and began to cut the meat. Again. "You're the one who walked in without even knocking first."

The man hummed. "I apologize. But I've never came here with a need to do so. As far as I know, this place has been abandoned."

"Not anymore." You were racking your brain for a plan to protect your son in case this man decided to do something.

He was very, very powerful, if he tried something you'd have no real way of winning against him. 

So the most you could do was hope he'd just go away.

"Really?" 

You froze feeling his breath lightly against your ear. He stood right next to you now. And not a sound was made as he moved. 

That shouldn't have been possible.

"And what exactly brings you here? Most would prefer to live in a place close to others. If something were to happen to you out here, no one would ever know."

You gulped and began chopping again.

Lucas, please dont wake up. Stay in that room.

"W-well," You cleared your throat. "Shouldn't a prince like you be in their palace learing to rule a kingdom?"

The man leaned away from you. "So you know who I am? Most would run in fear at the sight of me. Fascinating . . . ."

He lifted a finger at you causing the knife in your hands to slip from your grasp and float onto the counter. 

"You'll have nothing to eat if you continue cutting it so finely."

"Yes. But maybe I like it that way."

He hummed. "You're a strange one. What is your name, Child of Man?"

Was it safe to answer? 

Just as you were about to open your mouth to speak a different voice spoke.

"Mom, can I play outside?"

You bit your tongue and quickly walked over to your son who was walking over to you.

"Not now, sweetie. Dinner is almost ready, just go wait in the room."

You tried ushering Lucas back to the room, out of sight of the fae standing in the kitchen. 

But his eyes grew wide as he spotted the man and he wasted no time bounding over to him. It was as if he hadn't just woke up moments ago. You began to sweat, praying that the man wouldn't do anything to your boy.

Lucas smiled from ear to ear and jumped carelessly on the man who thankfully or unthankfully (you weren't sure yet) caught him in his arms.

"Daddy!"

Both the fae's and your eyes widened in shock at the boy's statement. 

"'Daddy?'"

"No, sweetie. That's not-"

"Dad, why didn't you come visit me? I missed you."

Lucas frowned angrily and punched the man's chest. 

"You were supposed to come for my birthdays but you didn't! You're mean."

You and the man stared at the boy incredulously.

You quickly rushed over to the pair and tried to take Lucas. "I am so sorry. Lucas, that is not your dad. Say sorry right now."

The boy held on tightly to the man, refusing to go to you, and said, "Yes he is. Look, we have the same hair and he's making dinner for us. He's my dad."

Oh to have the logic of a child once again.

Though you suppose this misunderstanding was your fault. You still hadn't told him the truth about his actual father. He was still under the impression that his dad was just traveling the world and wouldn't be back for a long time.

"Please forgive him. He's just a child."

The man simply began to laugh again, not seeming to take offense. That was good. You hoped.

"How amusing. I never imagined I'd be called that before. What an interesting pair you two are."

He set Lucas down on the ground

"I am not your father though, child. And I must be going now. Farewell, you two." 

Then, in the blink of an eye, he vanished leaving behind a few green fireflies where he once stood.

"Woww!" 

Lucas looked on in awe and reached towards the light bugs.

"Dad's so cool!"

You frowned. 

At least the fae was gone. And hopefully didn't come back.

"Lucas, he isn't your Dad. That's Malleus Draconia."

Masterlist

2 - A little Trip

[romanoffsbish]

We Got Lost in Translation…

Kate Bishop x Fem!Reader

Warnings: Heavy Miscommunication, Jealousy, Feelings of Betrayal, Depression, Heartbreak… But it ends happy 🤷🏼‍♀️

Smut: Angry/“Hate” Sex, Slut/Whore/Baby (K), Mommy (R), Oral(K), Fingering (K), Strap (K), Face Slapping, Kinks: Spanking/Punishment, Choking, Degrading/Praising combo

18+ | Minors DNI !!

5,530 Words

The clock struck midnight, a displeased huff fell passed your lips as you faced the reality, pulling the blanket up to your shoulders, and settling into your warm bed; alone once again.

———

Today was different though, she promised to be here, it was your anniversary for heavens sake. Five years together, a whole half a decade, and she missed every scheduled event for the day. You even checked the news, and low and behold there wasn't any earth shattering event taking place, and when you last checked her location it showed her to be at a diner of sorts. There was just no excuse this time, and you were tired, so incredibly so, it's been like this for a few months now, and you dealt with it, but this is proving to be your final straw.

Tears soaked your pillow as you slipped into a restless nights worth of sleep, and after tossing about at five am, having only managed to get four hours of straight sleep you huffed again., "Nope, I'm fucking done.," you grumbled into the painfully empty space, the covers flew off your body and you jumped off the mattress. After taking a shower you returned to the room, gathering every last item of yours to haphazardly toss it into your duffle bag, and taking one last look at the false image of love on the bedside table before slamming the door on your way out of the unwelcoming space.

—

Kate rushed into the apartment with an excuse at the ready, expecting to find you sat in the kitchen eating breakfast before you had work. Instead of your frowning face she was met with an eery silence, that only got more daunting as she turned the place upside down in search of you, only to find your drawers to be empty., "Fuck.," she rushed out of the apartment just as quickly as she rushed in, and raced off to where she knew you'd be—your sisters house.

Kate pummeled her fist into the door, willing you to be the one to answer, but of course she wouldn't be that lucky as she was met with the deadly glare of Wanda Maximoff, the woman that once warned her about breaking your heart, and judging by the look in her eye she'd done just that., "Please, Wanda, where is she?," she didn't care though, because she was here to fix everything, it was just a misunderstanding., "Bishop, you have two seconds to get off my property, before I do the work for you."

"Please, it's all just a —.," Kate cut herself off when she saw your face, it'd been a few days since she last saw you, but the sight of you so broken was a stark difference to your norm. It broke her heart to see you so distraught, and to know it was her that did it made it even worse., "Y/N/N, please, just let me explain.," she pleaded with you, ignoring the witches warnings in the hopes that you'd talk to her., "It's okay Wands.," you placed a hand to her shoulder, squeezing lightly to let her know this was a necessary step in the process.

"Lucky's at the neighbors, I told them you'd be by sometime this week to collect him.," you said as if this was the most casual of moments., "Y/N I-.," you cut her off once more with the wave of your hand, her eyes widening when she saw the key to your shared home in between the pads of your fingers., "Here you go, I took all of the stuff I cared to, the rest is yours.," she recoiled instantly, arms crossing like a petulant child who was refusing their vegetables but still expecting dessert., "No, Y/N you're being silly, let's go home and work this out. I love you!"

"Yeah, but you don't like me Kate!," your chest was heaving as you aired your dirty laundry out with the love of your life before Wanda's neighbors., "Don't be ridiculous!," she tried, but failed to interrupt you., "A part of you has grown to love me over the years, but you never liked me, you just pretended to because you'll always do what's right Kate, even if it's not what's right for you.," her face fell into an offensive expression as your words hit her hard, she loves every last part of you, and she doesn't understand where this is coming from.

"Yelena though, you do like her, I've never seen you laugh at one of my jokes like you do hers.," your hands furiously wiped away the bitter tears as they trailed down your smooth face., "I'd been hoping you'd prove me wrong, but when you never even made it home last night.," you paused to take in a shaky breath., "I knew."

"Please, don't.," the archer pleaded with you, and you truly looked at her for the first time since she'd arrived on your sister's doorstep. Her heart was visibly breaking, but you knew this was what she needed from you to move forward—or at least you believed that she did., "I'd known that it was over when I cried myself to sleep for the final night. Go home Kate.," and just like that you shut the door, and cast the woman out of your life for good.

Kate fell to her knees, a pained sob etching its way out of her throat, and as if the world was trying to sympathize with her it began to rain. Streams of tears fell from her face as she sobbed, this whole situation could've been avoided had she just fucking shown up last night over being a nervous drunken coward. Now her pocket weighed her down as she slowly returned to her feet, the fabric having been drenched in the rain, but moreover, it was by the enclosed ring meant for your finger.

Directly on the other side of the door you were stood sobbing in your sisters embrace, her arms strongly wrapped around you to provide you with comfort, and Natasha had the same idea as she joined the embrace, and offered you a mug of cocoa piled high with whipped cream and lots of chocolate and peppermint shavings.

Two hearts shattered in the span of seconds, and all it would've taken to fix the mess made was some kind of offered up clarity, but it appeared that further miscommunication was the chosen route for all parties involved...

—

An entire month flew by without a word spoken between either of you, and that might've been working well for you on your journey to heal, but for Kate it wasn't working well—like, at all. Every night she'd muster up a text, but then your words would ring in her head, the finality of your goodbye causing her heart to shatter further, and for her to erase the pleadings for another chance with your heart.

Yelena was growing tired of being sent to her voicemail so she wandered into the dark home, but quickly ran back out when a field mouse scampered across the floor. Only to return an hour later in the proper attire; a hazmat suit.

"Kate Bishop, get out of that bed.," Yelena shouted, trying to make sure she was heard through the glass of her headpiece., "Oh my god, what is this?!," Yelena shrieked, a piece of what appeared to once be pizza in her hands with a layer of greenery that was never intended for the delicious food to wear present, and in turn making her sick.

Her attempts to get the depressed girl out of bed failed, so she left, and headed straight for Wanda's house in a fit of pure annoyance., "Open up! We need to talk!," she pounded her first into the door so hard it was a shock it was still on its hinges as it flew open to reveal her sister's scowling face., "Privet homewrecker.," the blonde rolled her eyes, then tugged her sister outside of the house., "I'm no such thing, my house is in perfect condition, unlike Kate Bishop's.," the blonde shivered at the thought of her previous encounter, and though Nat was still upset for you, she was also intrigued.

"Y/N needs to make nice-nice with her, she is not doing well Natasha, and it's time we fix it.," Natasha laughed at her sister, as if it was her idea of a good time to play matchmaker., "No, Kate dug her own hole, hell, you even helped her with the shoveling, so fix it yourself, or better yet leave Y/N alone to heal."

"Natalia! Stop it with your silly little American phrases, there were no holes dug, and quite frankly you should know that I don't do the dirty works like that.," the blonde was growing frustrated, never once had she known that you thought her and Kate were falling in love, if she knew she'd have told you ages ago that there was no need to worry., "You were the reason it all ended Yelena, take some responsibility."

"I am what?," she gasped in offense., "I didn't do anything, they just poofed into a breakup."

"Seriously Yelena? The way you two used to flirt openly, and frequently was obvious to all.," Yelena frowned at her sister's words., "I don't understand, I thought friends flirted over here, is that not the custom? What about all of the sleepovers in the movies where they do it?!"

Natasha groaned as she realized the mess she now found herself in, because for every line of miscommunication sowed by the lot of you, it was now up to her, and of course her girlfriend to unweave the mess of broken people in the hopes of putting all your lives back on track., "Fine, I will help you, have Kate ready by tomorrow at two, and I'll bring Y/N."

—

Kate was a real piece of work, but after a round of convincing her you'd be there she got up. Entering the shower to rinse off the filth of a week, and while she did that Yelena quietly ushered in a maid service to handle the mess while she herself sat atop of a dresser to shelter away from the freely frolicking rodents.

Kate reentered her room a little shocked to be able to see the floor again, as well as to find a freshly ironed purple suit, with a sheer black top to go underneath, and the box she'd hidden beside it with all her selected pieces of jewelry. A nervous smile took over her face as she looked herself over in the mirror, tugging on the suit jacket to adjust the fit, and then after a moment's time she finally responded to Yelena's fist hitting her door by following her out of the apartment's and to a park.

Natasha told Wanda everything, and it wasn't hard for her to believe it, she knew you'd never felt like enough for the archer, so for you to have come to your conclusions the way you did truly adds up. In a moment of blind solidarity she took your side, and even though she knew there had to be more to the story she wasn't going to push you into investigating it.

From an outsiders perspective you looked fine, even appeared to be doing swimmingly, but Wanda always saw through your facades. An unbelievable ache still held your heart tight in its grasp, and she's more than thrilled to be playing a part in helping to ease it. Even if you're being an unbearable brat as she tugs you to central park for a proposed picnic with her girlfriend., "I don't want to be a third wheel."

Wanda ignored your grumblings for what felt like the zillionth time, reminding herself that it'd only be a few more moments before all of this would be over, and she could return to her paused program; The British Baking Show.

"Shut up, and sit.," she finally responded, her tone left no room for questions, and she smiled when you settled without a rebuttal., "Now you stay here, I'll be back in just a moment.," she lied, then scampered off to meet her lover, and her troublemaker of a sister behind a tree.

You hummed a comforting tune while perusing through the picnic basket, the food selection was perfect, but the more you sorted through it the more worried you became. Natasha was a health nut, and the lack of healthy options told you this wasn't the picnic you were offered. Felt more like a blind date, and that had you on your feet in no time, turning to run away, but falling back on your ass as you ran into a body.

"Kate?," even worse, your ex, and you'd be a lying son of a bitch to say she didn't look great. Then your heart sunk at the remembrance of the night that she walked away, she didn't negate your statements, let alone return to fight for you to take her back. No, she simply vanished, and solidified your overthinking mind's decision to end the relationship.

"Y/N...," she too uttered your name like a whispered prayer, totally transfixed on your beautiful face that she'd missed so much., "Please, don't run.," she managed to add, taking a seat next to you, and placing her hands over yours to keep you in place. A shiver ran through the both of your arms, and down your spines at the missed, familiar touch, and for a brief moment you relished in the comfort., "Why not? I don't appreciate an ambush."

Kate released a heavy sigh, it was showtime, and she knew this would be the last call if she wasn't careful with her words.

"I do.," you quirked a brow at her shortened statement that gave you nothing., "Like you.," you tried to pull your hands away from her, but she just gripped them tighter, then in a moment of desperation she threw her leg over you to straddle your lap, her hands moving to hold your face., "I like everything about you."

The sincerity in her eyes wasn't hidden, but to your jaded heart it wasn't easy to believe., "Kate, it's okay that you like.," her hands squished your face, causing your words to be muffled, and eventually cut off., "No, it's not okay that I let you believe such nonsense.," she firmly pressed on., "Yelena is a friend, there was never anything going on, and there never would be because I love you Y/N, but more importantly I like you, a hell of a lot really."

Her pointer finger tenderly traced over the lines on your face., "I like the sound of your adorable laughter whenever I tell you a joke, along with these tiny wrinkles that are etched on your face to prove how funny I am.," your brows furrowed at her asinine claims., "I like the way that you are like a total whiz at math, but for some reason you still use your fingers to count when adding up the smaller numbers.," you pouted at that, because how dare she call you out, but also your jaded heart fluttered as she continued to list off such random things.,

"I like watching you make your little crafts, you get so serious and engrossed in your work. It's the way you meticulously put peoples things together that is so inspiring, you're truly the most thoughtful person I know..."

"I like the way that your eyes light up when you see a stray cat waddling by, and the way that you'll drop whatever you're doing to find a way to feed and offer the cat comfort."

"Ooh, and I like the way your brows furrow, creating that little crease between them whenever you're lost in your thoughts.," as she pursed her lips in thought herself you decided you heard enough., "Kate, love, I get it.," her heart soared at the endearing term, and her face mirrored just that as she beamed at you, then she cupped your cheeks and pressed on.

"I like the way your body fits so perfectly to mine, as if you were specifically crafted by the Gods for me.," your lips upturned genuinely., "My very own Greek Goddess.," she teased, then in a bold move she pecked your lips.

"I like the way that you always kept me sane with something as simple as a smile, whenever the world became too much I knew I'd be safe in your arms, and I truly was.," this time as she spoke her voice involuntarily cracked., "I can't say that I like everything that you are always, because that would just be a little far fetched, but goodness Y/N/N, I never only tolerated you, but I will admit I forgot to cherish you."

Her hands shakily reached into the pockets of her suit jacket., "That day...," she mumbled while pulling out a red, velvet box, your eyes widening in overwhelming understanding., "I'd met up with a few friends at the diner, telling them my plans for our big day, but the longer I sat there with a drink in my hand the more my nerves started to take over, and it's crazy, but without you there it was like I couldn't cope. My friends all left, but I stayed, frozen to my seat, and it wasn't until the clock struck 1am that the poor worker had to usher me out."

"I walked around aimlessly for hours, knowing I'd fucked the whole thing up, and it was when the sun began to rise that I raced home to find you gone, and that was my worst nightmare. You're supposed to be planning our wedding right now, but instead you're living thirty minutes away from me, and no longer mine.," you chuckled, slightly catching her off guard, and causing her frown to deepen., "Katie, I think we both know I'll always be yours.," she smiled hopefully as soon as she saw the truth settled beneath your soft smile.

"This thing we've built, it's my most valuable asset, no amount of money or Avenging could come close to what we have here Y/N. I'd give it all up if it meant that you'd be mine forever.," she went to open the box but you were quick to clamp your hands over hers, and you felt bad as she instantly began to cry., "Kate, hey, calm down...," you moved your hands to her face., "I'm not saying a definitive no, it's just a 'let's get back to where we once were,' and then you can propose to me like you originally planned."

Kate couldn’t hold back at the promise in your tone, so she surged forward, and captured your lips with her own. The both of you sighed, as it was a dearly missed affection from both ends.

"This is the part where we stop spying and leave right?," Yelena suddenly blurted, a bit thrown off by the two of you making out., "Yeah.," Natasha agreed., "Yup, definitely.," and with fast steps the witch abandons her post and the sisters follow her in post haste.

The sound of a car screeching effectively got the two of you to separate, seeing the familiar Camry speeding away told you whom it was., “Welp, there went my ride.,” you teased, and the arched looked at you with a teasing smirk., “Good thing I brought my trusty two seater.,” you looked into her brown eyes, finding the way the sun reflected off of them beautiful, and the longer you looked at her you felt this urge. It’d been months since you’d acted upon it, and you found your appetite for food dwindling as the other was roaring at you., “Take me home.”

Kate saw the way your eyes darkened, and she was more than excited for what that meant, but deep down she was more thrilled that you said ‘home,’ you were finally coming home to her. So she obviously wasted no time lifting you, and the picnic supplies up off the ground, and tugging you off towards her purple sports car.

The whole ride was spent in silence, because in the prior moment you were swept away by the romanticism of Kate’s actions, and her words, but now that you were in her passenger seat you felt that former resentment festering. Feeling her hand in yours, though familiar, felt like it was destined to burn you, that if you were to trust her again, she’d just let you down. Loving her was once your greatest strength, and in many ways it was also your weakness. She’d never been held accountable for the hurt she leaves in her wake, and you decided that would be ending tonight; she’d feel it too…

Kate was none the wiser, she happily parked her car, and you kept up the illusion with a smile, and a tender squeeze of her hand.

As you entered your old home the smile that you held was genuine, the place looked the same as how you left it, and that settled you. Kate went to plop on the couch, hoping you’d follow, but you just stood still in the doorway., “Um, Y/N, I just want you to know that when you left I kinda fell apart.,” you bit your tongue at her sudden awkward confession, the anger was finally at its peak., “Good, now you know exactly how I fucking felt every single time you said you’d be here Kate, and then weren’t.”

A smirk took over your face when you saw hers fall, you slowly stalked over to the girl, your hand quick as it gripped her by the throat, and shoved her into the wall., “Y/N.,” your hand only tightened., “No, shut the fuck up, if I wanted to hear you talk we’d be at the park.,” your lips slammed to hers, and she brokenly moaned into your mouth as this newfound aggressive side of you was shockingly exciting.

“Oh, you like that now do you Kate?,” she tried to nod, to scream a resounding yes, but you just cut her ability off even further., “Maybe if I’d been more aggressive then you’d have been here then?,” you chuckled bitterly., “Had I maybe fucked you like a worthless whore then you’d have made it home for fucking dinner?”

Kate gasped when you released your hold on her by tossing her aggressively onto the couch., “Y/N/N.,” she tried to reach out, to remedy the obvious pain in your heart, but she only gasped once more as you slapped her across the face., “No fucking talking slut.,” you grabbed her by her chin, digging your nails into the taut skin., “Do I make myself fucking clear whore?”

Kate nodded dumbly, completely thrown by how excited her body was for this side of you, even though her heart was so clearly aching alongside yours. Her eyes trailed over your face, a whine left her when she saw how you were hurting, and you took notice of the love. For some reason though, what was meant to be reassuring, only made your more pissed off.,

“Take your fucking clothes off, mommy will be back shortly.,” as soon as you left Kate did what she was told as tears of immense regret slowly trailed down her cheeks., “I’m so sorry…”

When you returned to find Kate laying flat on her back, a distant look in her eyes, and fully at your mercy you found yourself to be smirking., “Looks like the slut can listen, good girl.,” she immediately turned her head to face you, and her eyes widened at the sight of you in your lace bra, and with a massive strap harnessed., “Like what you see?,” you teased the woman, the fear in her eyes was obvious, but as you approached her you took notice of her cunt.

In all its bare glory you could see just how ready for you she was, honestly, you could see your strap sliding right on in with ease, but there’d be no fun in that really., “Tell me, what is it you want?,” your hands settled on her bent knees, pushing them down onto the couch., “You.,” you snickered at her., “Well no shit.,” her lip trembled and you rolled your eyes.

“For the love of all things holy, I guess I’ll just have to figure it out myself.,” you groaned, but then she whimpered softly., “Y-your mouth.”

“Look at that, you’re finally learning how to communicate, good fucking girl.,” you mocked her, then in a move to prevent her sad response you dove right on in, lapping at her folds, and pulling the wildest of moans from the woman. Kate had never been this turned on in her life, every nerve in her body felt like it was on fire as you ate her out without relent, your tongue was deep within her when she fell over the edge.

It infuriated you that she took so easily to accepting the pleasure, she didn’t even have the decency to ask—no, she just took, and took like she always fucking did, and you weren’t having it at all., “Such a greedy little whore.,” you spat as you raised to face her wide eyes., “Did you forget to ask?,” she gulped nervously when she saw the rage in your eyes., “I-I’m…”

“Save the apology for someone who cares Kate” you smirked., “Mm, because you don’t know the half of how sorry you’re about to be baby.,” your lips slammed to hers, your tongue forcing its way passed her lips, while your hands were roaming over her body, gripping so tightly that you knew you’re fingerprints would adorn the skin of her hips beneath the morning sunlight.

Kate squealed when you pulled back just to suddenly flip her over, then she cried out when your hand landed harshly against her bare ass., “Say you’re sorry like you mean it, and count.,” you took turns laying a slap to each cheek. Your entire body felt impossibly warm the longer you went on, almost like you were drunk with power. It was obvious to you by the slick that trailed down your own thighs that you were finding the way her cheeks reddened, and reverberated with each slap incredibly hot., “I’m so fucking sorry Y—mommy, twenty six.,” her overly pained sobs were what finally broke you free from your dizzying trance.

“I know you are baby, I know…,” you took a second to momentarily offer her reassurance, your hands now caressed the sore skin of her bottom, and though she whined you knew she was grateful for the lighter touch. In a moment of exploration your fingers slid down, finding her dripping cunt awaiting you., “Your cries speak of pain, but my oh my baby, your soaked cunt here drips with another story.,” Kate felt herself clench around nothing as you spoke the truth; as painful as the slaps were, they left her feeling nothing short of desperate., “Please…”

Kate’s body jolted as you slammed two finger’s into her eager hole, and you were shortly rewarded with her broken moans, the pleasure you were bestowing upon her was unending., “You’re taking my fingers so well, swallowing them just how I’d expect your slutty pussy to.,” the woman was quite literally a mess with all the dirty talk, her mind couldn’t keep up, and all you got from her was pornographic moans that brought a wide set smile to your face.

You grunted as you felt her clenching around your walls with every thrust of your fingers, and with the way she was moving in sync with you, you knew she was getting close., “Come on now, remember the rules baby.,” you were excited at the prospect of further punishments, but in all honesty you didn’t think she could take anymore, so you warned her., “Beg for it.”

“Fuck, p-please let me cum mommy, it hurts, I need to let go. Promise to be your good girl.,” you beamed at her first attempt, leaning over her you settled a few kisses along her spine., “Let go for mommy baby.,” you whispered the permission just as your fingers curled inside her, and your thumb swiped over her clit., “There you go, mhm, drench my fingers baby.”

Kate’s body convulsed as stars clouded her vision, she was getting emotional whiplash with the varying degrees of your mood, but in some odd way it only furthered her pleasure., “You look so pretty like this, all marked up, no way in hell you’ll ever forget where you belong again, now will you?,” you flipped her onto her back, with this wave of rage quickly dying as she winced., “It’s okay.,,” she melted into your hand as it cupped her cheek, this glimpse of the you she’s used to was able to make her heart’s aching lessen for the moment., “You’re okay?”

Kate nodded, letting you know that you were okay to continue, and then she whimpered pathetically when you lovingly kissed her for the first time since this whole ordeal started. When your hands held her hips in a tight grip again she prepared herself for total carnality, she knew the pain was still at the surface for you, and if fucking her senseless was your way of releasing some of it she wouldn’t complain.

“Oh fuck.,” the words slipped from her as you pushed the thick head of your strap into her, she hadn’t ever seen this one before, part of her wondered if it was an anniversary gift, or if this was new for your personal collection. A few tears trailed down her temple as she pondered the possibility of you being with another in your months time apart, but she didn’t dwell on it for long because once you bottomed out with an abrupt thrust she was void of thought.

“Fuck, there we go.,” you groaned, totally in awe as you peered down to see how the large strap had her filled to the brim., “Oh shit.,” the sight of your bulge protruding from her belly had you losing all sense of rationality as you aggressively began to pound her into the couch. Kate’s hands were holding onto your shoulders for some sort of grounding as your bodies were moving against one another’s, her nails digging into your skin with every pained gasp you pulled., “Shit, I-I need to cum, mommy please.”

“Of course you do.,” you mocked the woman, then you gave her permission just as your lips met hers to catch her moans with a sloppy kiss. Kate failed to keep up with you as her body was trembling wildly beneath yours, so you simply chose to explore her mouth as she rode out her high, then just as she went to collapse into the cushion you flipped the both of you over., “Don’t pretend like you don’t have more in you, sluts like you always do, and mommy’s in need of her own release, so ride my fucking cock.”

The idea of pleasing you was obviously enough motivation for the exhausted girl to move, she began a slow and steady grinding, ensuring that with each drop down you felt the pressure of it on your aching clit, she watched your face closely and relished in the confirmation of your blissful expressions., “Baby, faster, I’m close.,” your words were choked as you felt the warmth in your abdomen increase, then as Kate began to hop up and down at an increased pace you began to meet her with a fast paced thrust.

Kate watched you fall apart beneath her, and that was what sent her spiraling into her final orgasm of the night, and what left her a crying mess on your chest as she collapsed into you., “I-I’m so sorry Y/N, I didn’t, I never mean to hurt you like this, please, don’t leave me again. I need you here with me—always, please…,” you were still a bit dazed out, but your arms were quick to tighten around her broken form., “Shh, KitKat, I know you’re sorry, it’s okay.,” she shook her head., “No, it’s not. I-I broke you, and I made you think I didn’t like you.”

“You’re right, it wasn’t okay, but it is now.,” you gently pecked her trembling lips., “We’re okay now Kate, just rest now, we’ll clean up in a bit, then we’ll have that big, messy healing talk.,” she gazed into your eyes for a long beat, then after she found truth in your words she settled into your embrace., “I love you Y/N.,” your lips pressed to her forehead., “I love you too Kate.”

Truth be told the two of you had a lot to work through, but in this moment, with the archer lying so vulnerably in your arms you knew you’d be able to mend what’s been broken. Kate Bishop was the only woman you’d ever love, and you’d fight to be the same to her.

————

[blood-grove]

scar trails

now -> next life (wip)

-> tws; injuries , gore , sickness , death , vomiting (basically everything you think to expect in a zombi apocalypse)

-> older brother!kyle & black child!reader

-> a/n: okay so right this has been in my head for days now..so hear you go! also boom the reader is black bc why tf wouldnt they be (ive been dying to write abt a black!reader for so long as a black person)

-> n/n - nickname

y/n - your name ofc

"n/n c'mon" I huffed as I dragged them away from the bugs they were fawning over ignoring there complaints as we kept walking.

We needed to keep heading toward the countryside but ever since Y/N got sick I've had to make us take detours for medicine, extra food, non-expired cough medicine to try and give them some relief, and looking extra for warm sleeping spots that weren't a walker nest.

It was just a cold I knew it was, I tried my best to keep them from worrying about turning.

They'd be okay once we reached Grandpa's.

I had been avoiding eating for a while I know it's dumb but they needed the food the more they ate the quicker they'd recover.

I wish I paid attention to Moms cooking more she always knew the best food to eat while sick, I had snatched a cookbook from a while back but it'd be no use with what we have.

Y/N had been a trooper throughout this all I honestly didn't know what to say we've been out here two months now and they've been going on strong.

I know they terrified though so am I but we have to keep moving.

"Are we there yet?"

"Y/n please don't start!—"

"I was quiet for five minutes like you said!"

I could just feel that cheeky grin on your face as we walked along the railroad not like any trains would be coming threw anytime soon.

It's been fifteen minutes of 'are we there yet' and I've considered turning into a walker.

We finally reached the next town that I figured out on the map, It was empty like the rest but on the next step closer to the country I saw a medicine store and grocery store and headed for them Y/n in tow.

"Do you think they have candy?! Can we get some please?"

Y/n whined as we entered the grocery store luckily still remembering to keep there voice down as I huffed.

"Look if the candy looks..alright we can get one box okay? But we need the space for food.." I whispered as I scanned the small shop's isles zoning in on packaged and canned food.

Dropping our rather light bag to the side to fill up checking the dates as I either tossed them in or tossed them aside.

Y/n went to the small section of the candy isle before coming back with a box for me to examine.

"Look it's those chewy ones mom gets!"

"Mm.. They look fine throw them in your bag.. I think we've got enough for the week now.."

I frowned slightly as I zipped up the bag hoisting it back on me it was certainly heavier but it'd be worth it.

Y/n carried their own bag but it was just medicine and there plushie I insisted I could carry them both but they wouldn't budge or let go.

I wish I was more vigilant we had moved on to the pharmacy Y/n was deciding which flavor medicine they wanted which honestly since it was warm liquid cough medicine it wouldn't taste good regardless.

Then the door opened again.

Now we both hid behind the cashier counter I gripped the handgun our parents gave me like our lives depended on it which it did.

Y/n huddled close to me keeping quiet despite their trembling.

I've never shot really anyone with the gun walkers or people.

People were iffy during these times.

We just avoided them even if it meant on missing out on shelter or food were not idiots.

The person stepped behind the counter and we pushed ourselves further under the counter basically squeezing each other to be smaller in the cramped space.

"I know you there no point n' hiding just come out and show yourself."

He sounded older his voice rough from either age or cigs nearly as familiar as Grandpa he'd just used to go on about not wasting your lungs on the things in that gravelly voice of his.

But this wasn't Grandpa of course.

A quick look at Y/n who was on the verge of sobbing.

I flicked the handguns safety off as I stepped out aiming it at the much larger man now that I had a better look at him.

He had backed up a bit when he caught sight of the handgun despite the obvious lack of experience I was probably showing.

Sweaty palms and trembling hands.

He looked older of course not so old that I could just rush him and hope one of his aging body parts acted up, He was clearly a bit more prepared than us his gear looked professional.

Military.

Not like the two school book bags that used to hold both of our homework that were slowly getting holes in them now carrying the only possessions you both had left in the world besides each other.

"Look mate- I don't mean you any—"

"Shut up."

My voice cracked as I inwardly cringed at the attempt to sound tough gripping the gun tighter.

"..I don't mean any harm okay?.."

The man shifted as he looked at me or mainly my gun I guess mentally deciding if I was bluffing with blanks or actually knew how to shoot.

Y/n was still huddled under the counter hidden.

"..Were your parents at? Seem a bit too young to be out here on your own."

I just glared further.

"..Go away."

"Kid..I-"

"Leave or I'll fuckin' s-shoot you-"

My hands trembled as I straighten his posture.

He just nodded as he left hands still up in the air in an unconvincing attempt to fool me that he wasn't a threat.

As soon as he left and didn't try to sneak back into the store I grabbed our bags hastily sacrificing some food so we wouldn't be slowed down making sure to snatch some medicine reminded by Y/n's coughing and now sobbing fit.

Picking them up despite them not being that smaller than me as we both left the area with haste.

We have to reach the countryside.

I want to go back to getting in extra sleep for summer break and staying up late at night with Y/n, Mom, And Dad watching shitty horror film and eating ice cream.

But now the summer heat was unbearable at time the too cool nights just made me worry for Y/n's cold.

I just want to go home and be a kid.

Why do I already feel so old?.

a/n: yeahh yup didnt plan this one out..

[gabessquishytum]

i saw something on twitter for a very different ship and fandom but i really do think itd work well with dream and hob, especially considering the other asks that r on ur account (age gap, sugar daddy, omegaverse etc) like. older!omega!dream. with younger!alpha!hob.

dream, who, after many failed relationships and one self-inflicted very long break from dating, has decided that he's better off not dating at all anymore because as an omega he's past his prime. he may be lonely but he's not dumb enough to think alphas wouldn't pick a younger omega over him, so he doesn't bother entertaining the idea at all. his hair is starting to grey at the temples and his heats are sparse enough now that he's confident it'd practically be a miracle if he could get pregnant at this point. but then hob, who's young and an alpha sets him off in ways he hasn't felt in years, is what makes him change his mind. and hob, who because he's a young attractive alpha, could have practically any omega he wanted, but he chose dream, because who wouldn't want an older gentleman to take care of & get taken care of in turn <3

Literally holding on for dear life....... this is So Good.

Older Omega Dream!!!! I'm just. Yeah!!!!!! He's given up being mated and having pups at this point. He has a great career, he has friends (kind of. His sister counts, right?). He goes to a bar every other week for a drink because it's part of his routine now.

And one day he meets this new young bartender, who not only is kind to him but also flirts with him. Dream is very... to the point and he's like "you know I'm 45 and it's not even worth trying with me." But Hob just winks and smiles and draws a little picture of a heart on Dream’s napkin.

Dream comes back week after week and Hob is always there, smiling, flirting, listening to Dream’s occasional bouts of melancholy. And then one week Dream doesn't show up and Hob is so worried but it turns out he just had a heat. He confides in Hob that he's always worried that it's going to be the last one. And Hob kisses his cheek and tells him that he's perfect, heat or no heat.

That same night Hob tells Dream that he's serious about him, it's not just flirting anymore. Dream thinks he's insane but he agrees to give Hob a chance: one date.

One date, which turns into two, then three. Then their first time sleeping together, and moving in together (Dream won't let Hob live in his shitty bedsit any longer when he has a perfectly lovely house they can share), and their first shared heat. Marriage and a mating bite follow soon after.

Hob may still be in his 20s but he's perfect in every way - kind and strong and absolutely 100% whipped for Dream. There's nothing he'd rather do than pull Dream off to bed for a nice long session of knotting and cuddles. Turns out that even when his heats finally drop out, Dream is more than capable of keeping up with his younger partner. He very much enjoys taking care of his alpha, just as Hob takes care of him.

[icedmetaltea]

Health anxiety: something is wrong Me: no dude lol you're being dramatic everything is fine Body: randomly develops a nut allergy (?) Body: blood pressure consistently 130-150/80-110 at night for some reason Body: suddenly can't tolerate yogurt- including lactose free Body: Mysteriously loses 1-2 lbs per week when not on diet past month Body: constant anxiety even when not pmsing Health anxiety: come on man Me: EVERYTHING IS FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE EVERYTHING IS FINE WE'RE DEFINITELY NOT GETTING CANCER OR HEART DISEASE OR ANYTHING AHAHAHAHAHAHA

(incoherent venty stuff below, tw for suicidal thoughts and just... idk weird psychosis type stuff ig)

I can't even go to the doctor cause agoraphobia and like... even then they just blame everything on anxiety. Even when my BP is this erratic, anywhere from 110/60-156/110, and I can't make a telehealth appointment for some goddamned reason that they won't explain

And I don't know if they'll sign that form so I can get ebt and ya know not starve (I sent it via email but I got said email from a static-filled call so I don't even know if it's the right address or if they'll do it digitally)

And from the sounds of things they won't make me a note to file for a tuition appeal so I'll be saddled with a $700 fine that'll go to collections if I can't pay it by december WHEN I HAVE $600 IN MY BANK and I need it to pay for basic living essentials till I can get approved for SSI IF I even can which will take at LEAST 6 months

and everything adds up, toothepaste, paper towels, laundry soap, dish soap, sponges, trashbags, pads... the list goes on and it adds up so fast

And nobody aside from the therapist has shown any goddamned empathy for me when I've made calls, it reaaaally feels like the doctors and nurses just hope I kill myself, cause it'd be easier for them, cause I'm a burden, cause it's easier for me to die than for them to make me a telehealth appointment or sign a goddamned 1-paper form so I can fucking feed myself and not be saddled with debt

it'd be so much easier for everyone

I've been thinking about blowing my brains out all day. it used to be just when I was pmsing but it's been pretty much all month when my imaginary friend isn't distracting me with stupid shit and/or age regressing to cope

I just think, sure the gun would be expensive but then I wouldn't have to worry about money anymore, or panic attacks, or being a financial burden to my mom, or being a disappointment, or PMDD, or sleeping till 4pm when the depression gets bad, or anything

Nothing at all. Just blackness. Or maybe there's something after death, idk. Maybe I'm going to heaven or hell, but either way hopefully things just... are different there. No more capitalism. No more mental health shit. No more jobs and school and people working just to work and then die, no more of your worth getting judged by how smart you are or how valuable you are as a wage slave

No more heart pounding, no more gasping for air for the 20th time as I try to sleep, no more walking around in dreams where I feel like a ghost (and yet I look forward to it bc at least it's... different. It's somewhere than isn't here) no more waking up disappointed that I even woke up

No more thinking about how my parents are gonna die someday and then I'll really be alone

No more thinking about how my sibling left me

No more thinking about how my best friend left me

No more anything

I don't expect to make it to the end of this year. I don't know when I'll do it but it's kinda a given. I should've just let myself freeze to death back in December like I'd originally planned. At least I could die to something I loved. Why'd I bother sticking around? What have I gained? I'm just living to live

What, to finish all those books? I have hundreds, I'll never finish them all

To finish that game? I'll never finish that either

To get on SSI? I probably won't even be approved before trump takes power (be honest with yourself, you know he will. A war's coming and it ain't lookin good for people like us. He wants people like us dead)

It's so dark and lonely tonight. I have a billion thoughts in my head and it's supposed to be better now bc it's not my luteal or follicular phase... I can't even have the one good week I'm supposed to have PMDD-wise

I just can't stop thinking about how much better everything would be without me. And idk I feel kinda in a way like said imaginary friend is like... idk shutting down my body somehow. Cause even they know it's for the best. I know that's just psychosis brain talking cause they're not real but at times like these I wonder

But man, I wish if that was the case they'd make it quick and painless. A gun would be easier, just saying. Oh but it'd be too loud, make too much of a mess, blah blah blah... it's quick and effective. Sure it might not work and turn me into a vegetable. Prolly wouldn't though. It works more often than hanging/blood loss/jumping. I know they don't want me gone but even they have to admit it's about time. They've known it for a long time. I should've frozen to death. It would've been quick in 0 degree weather. We could've listened to music. Mom and dad wouldn't have found us till morning.

But no. Just had to chicken out

Ugh

[ashyblondwaves]

The ily prompts 86 Jancy pls

Prompt: “You’re important too.” Pairing: Jonathan Byers/Nancy Wheeler Rating: T Word Count: 619

"Oooh look right there!"The sonographer pointed. "Looks like he's waving."

"He?" Nancy said, alarmed.

"Sorry, I just don't like calling babies it," the sonographer explained. "The gender is still being kept secret at your request."

Nancy sighed in relief and tightened her grip on Jonathan's hand.

"31 weeks," Jonathan said supportively. "We're almost there."

When Nancy's water broke at 24 weeks, she was put on mandatory hospital bedrest for the rest of her pregnancy. They'd made it to 31 weeks and the baby was looking great. It wasn't what either of them planned or hoped for, but it was the best case scenario for their circumstances.

"I feel like I've been lying in bed for years," Nancy complained, but the anger in her voice never reached her face as she smiled up at the ultrasound screen. "Worth it."

As the sonographer finished up Nancy's ultrasound, Jonathan stood and stretched, thanking the tech as she shuffled out of the room with the portable ultrasound machine rolling after her.

"Another good report," he said, kissing Nancy on the top of her head. "Can I get you anything?"

Nancy shook her head, taking note of the dark circles that'd formed under her husband's eyes. He'd been running back and forth between home, work and the hospital for weeks, sleeping in what looked to be an uncomfortable chair turned couch situation next to her bed every night. He went home to shower and pack more clothes. Otherwise he was at the work or the hospital.

"Actually," Nancy said, trailing off as she waited for Jonathan's full attention. "You know what I'd like?"

"Tell me," Jonathan replied, moving to her at the side of the hospital bed.

"I want you to go home and rest."

Jonathan shook his head adamantly. He pulled up a chair and plopped down, rubbing his temples and sighing.

"You know I can't do that," he said.

"Why not?"

"I won't rest until the baby is born."

"And then you won't rest because it'll be keeping us up all night," Nancy reasoned. "Please, Jonathan. Go home for a little while, sleep in a real bed. I'll be fine."

"And what if you're not?" Jonathan asked, his voice wavering. "What if I leave and...."

Nancy closed her eyes and took a deep breath in through her nose.

"You being here isn't going to stop anything from happening, Jonathan," Nancy said sadly. "I need you to go home and rest so you're in your best shape when we meet our child."

"You two are too important to me to just-"

"You're important, too," Nancy reminded him. "I can't do this without you at your best. Please go rest."

Jonathan was silent as he dropped his head and looked down at his shoes.

"You're really ok with me leaving?" he asked.

"Would I have suggest it if I weren't?"

No, she wouldn't have.

With a resigned sigh, Jonathan stood up, grabbing his bag from the floor and swiping his keys off the adjustable table.

"You're sure?" he asked again.

"Go before I change my mind!" Nancy bellowed, pulling a smile from Jonathan's tired face.

"I'll be back in the morning," Jonathan promised.

"I don't want to see you here until tomorrow night," Nancy ordered. "Rest, eat something that isn't hospital food and for the love of God wash that bag it smells like a gym sock."

A full laugh erupted from Jonathan then and he nodded, seemingly liking the idea how that it'd been suggested.

"I'll see you tomorrow night," Jonathan said. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to Nancy's lips. "I love you."

"I love you, too," Nancy parroted, smiling as she watched her husband walk out of the room.

[inkofamethyst]

March 27, 2024

daylist: symphonic nerdy wednesday evening (city pop, japanese jazz, orchestra, film score [it was exclusively ~vgm~ (lots of NieR and Final Fantasy, lots of vocal tracks!) lol], mmorpg)

song obsession of the week: The Old Witch Sleep and the Good Man Grace - The Amazing Devil gfkgdkjgkjfgkjd

Man I am just so pro-right to repair. Was thinking about getting some new headphones because the earpads on the ones I've had for years have been flaking bad for months, but they sell what are essentially the same earpads online! The headphones themselves are still fully functional, so why contribute to electronic waste when I don't have to? And now they feel perfect :)

Speaking of repair though, I've been done dirty by orthodontists and dentists all my life. And now I might have to pay, again, to fix issues that were ultimately caused by them. I've done (almost) everything right. Wore my retainers nightly, brushed, and I'm now into flossing regularly. So annoying.

Anyway I'm lowk stressing about the future (because of course I am) because even though I could "afford" a solo apartment, I also can't help but feel like that would be squandering my opportunity to save a ton toward the future when my savings would make the most impact (yeah, sorry, it's another one of these, and won't be the last I'm sure). Living solo is something I want and would love to do. And according to my calculations, I could. Even without sacrificing retirement and saving toward a house. Which is more than most graduate/PhD students are ever able to do during their schooling. But it's the anxiety of knowing that I could do more if I had even just one roommate. It's like, considering my situation as a student, what I already have saved, what I will be able to save, what I will have left over each month (a seriously comfortable sum (because, like a platypus, I don't do much)), I would be fine. I would be happy! But having one roommate wouldn't be the worst thing in the world, I guess. And then I could contribute more to my future happiness.

I don't know.

Can I place a monetary value on comfort?

I have a little under a year to figure out what I'm going to do. I can tell you what I want. I want someone to tell me that choosing to live alone would not be ruinous. That it'd be okay. That it'd be worth it for my contentment. That I'm taking the right steps, that I have a good foundation set. But I have to make the decision by myself. And then live with it. Through whatever comes. Because I don't really want to move more than once more before my program ends (and another thing, it would be much more difficult to save up for moving again if I lived alone).

Part of me wants to approach this with the mindset that the future is never guaranteed. And that, as a result, it's okay to splurge now. (Also there's the part about my grandmother potentially not being able to take care of her dog as she ages, and I wouldn't want to rehome her entirely (the puppy, not my grandmother).)

But like, okay. The 50-30-20 needs-wants-saving axis, right? I could stick "living alone" as part of wants since I don't otherwise really spend that much in wants ultimately.

Let me go calculate.

Okay. Post-tax (which is how you're meant to calculate 50-30-20), I'd be doing a bit better than the suggested model (but!!! this includes all the help I'm getting without which I simply would not consider this in the first place).

Let me... let me do some future sims.

nerdwallet says I'll be fine.

Okay. Okay! okay.. Ohh-kay.

I'm not completely decided but at least I have all that information available to me.

Today I'm thankful that.. I don't have a lot of homework tonight. So I can go to bed. OH OH ALSO thankful the person I've wanted as my secondary advisor for months but was too afraid to ask said yes and seemed happy to say so <3

[edit, ~a week later: the trouble will be finding a 1b/1b at my price point (still pretty low for this area since I don't really want to settle for a studio) that's close enough and has my minimum requirements (I suppose another potential option would be saving aggressively for another year to grind out a pot of money that would sustain me for three years at a slightly higher price point)]

[someoneinjersey]

all I did was brush the surface of talking about my stupid rp characters with @the-one-blog-to-rule-them-all earlier and now i'm like SHOULD I GET A WEBSITE TO LOG THEM ALL WITH BIOS AND PICTURES AND STUFF I STILL KIND OF REMEMBER HOW TO DO HTML?????

no pls calm down I just like talking about myself and my shit because i'm self centered and all my likes and hobbies were discounted most of my life by my family.

yo I'm reading this book called Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents and fuuuuuuuck me its like reading about my whole fucking life and personality and my parents' personalities and Jesus Christ it's a great read but like fuck you just don't realize how fucked up things were in your childhood when its hammered into you that you didn't starve or get beaten or experience homelessness or addiction.

speaking of I am soooooo tired of talking to my mom every goddamn day like if I don't check in with her by like 6 pm she texts me like ARE YOU OKAY?!!??! like yeah I'm just doing things or sleeping or something like it is not a priority to talk to you every single damn day bro she even called the other day and instead of saying hi said "are you glad to hear from your mom?" like I don't talk to her EVERY DAY. and that's really actually emotionally manipulative because then i'm forced into answering a weird question to give her some kind of validation or trying to dodge it by just bringing up whatever she was just complaining about to distract her from it so I don't have to answer. id really love to just check in maybe once a week but I feel obligated because she's so miserable in her marriage and home and now she has this HUGE GAPING WOUND that won't heal as a complication from her transplant and it is GNARLY and it looks absolutely fake but she's suffering from it and so its like I cant even try to set a boundary right now.

my aunt was talking about having a big family get together over the summer and I was like oh yeah it'd be great if Kate and I could both come up wouldn't that be nice and like ............................ no. like I miss my extended family and I enjoyed seeing them when I went "home" in October but going up there again would mean A the stress of travel again B I cant afford traveling to begin with and C seeing my mom and her husband. I could handle my mom for like a day or something but if I have to be around her husband its absolutely horrible. plus like I don't even feel welcome back at their house because they emptied my room and redecorated it within two weeks of me moving down here. I have so much PTSD and so many triggers about going back "home". I do miss New Jersey but more in the sense of being by the water and convenient things and close cities to do stuff in and hockey games and the pride of just being from NJ but as much as I hate this place here it is NOT worth it to go back to NJ again for a long long long long long time.

blah blah blahhhh

[skippyv20]

June 19th, 2007, 02:27 pm

SAVEMERIS

Harry's living it up in Cow-town

Romping with Harry More stories emerge about the prince's night out in Calgary

CALGARY -- Frustrated in a bid to lure home a Cowboys barmaid, a bawdy Prince Harry enjoyed a spanking good time with another of the nightclub's staffers in a northwest Calgary home, reports a British newspaper.  In a story headlined Skirty Harry, the soldier prince training at CFB Suffield fell for shooter girl Katherine Smith after failing to close the deal with Cherie Cymbalisty, 22, in the early morning of June 7.  Selling her story to the U.K. tabloid, Smith, 20, said after Cowboys closed she and co-worker Kate Rowe went with Harry to a rented house in Citadel where they got under the covers and royalty got rough and randy.  "He had his hand on my thigh then all of a sudden, he slapped me on my butt," she told the paper, adding foul-mouthed Harry had earlier removed his boxers and donned a colourful sarong.  "It hurt real bad and I was kind of taken aback." 

Smith said she fled the bed but Harry followed, slapping her thigh and buttocks again.  Hours earlier, Harry had been eyeing Smith, buying numerous shooters from her and drinking heavily.  Christopher Tahn, who represents Cowboys' owners, said rumours had swirled that Cymbalisty's flirting with royalty wasn't the end of that night's princely romps.  "We started hearing rumblings that after Cherie left, two other girls were hanging around and took off with him," said Tahn.  The two girls assured him they wouldn't go public with their story because "they were afraid they'd experience what Cherie had from the negative publicity ... and lo and behold, what do we see?"  Tahn, who negotiated Cymbalisty's fee from the News of the World, said he believes Smith and Rowe were paid the same as the first woman.  "Their story's worth five times what Cherie got," said Tahn, who wouldn't divulge the amount.  Smith also said she fended off Harry's invitation to join him in the shower and ogled a burn scar on the prince's chest supposedly left by a flaming shot glass.  "Harry begged me to stay and sleep there over and over but I got Kate out of the bedroom and we called a cab and left," she said.  Asked about the likelihood of any other bawdy tales of royalty emerging from that night, Tahn said "your guess is as good as mine."  He left an invitation for Harry to return to the nightclub for Stampede week.  "That would be absolutely wonderful - it'd show he's taking it all in stride," said Tahn.

Thank you, I do recall this story..,.❤️

Just so you know….I had found it on Daily Mail…posted it and it deleted my post, I can’t find it again…..❤️

[firefurious]

in relation to what we were just talking about , but . how does grace cope with all the bullshit that happens to her in the week the game takes place in ? can she sleep ? does she cry or have any sort of breakdown privately ? or does she sort of just . not let herself stop and think about the trial ( yet at the same time be motivated by it ) and all these petty and spiteful fucks getting in her way ?

for the most part, grace is just pushing through and not letting herself stop. i think she knows there's literally no time for it; she can't give herself the luxury to process everything that's happening to her because each moment wasted on that is a moment less to figure out what happened and prove her innocence.

which means she gets terribly stressed out whenever whoever is helping her tells her to just wait. not only it's time she feels she could be using to act, waiting is when everything threatens to catch up to her and she can't stop. she doesn't wanna risk not being able to pick herself up again.

she sleeps very little, and mostly only because the stress and exhaustion of everything happening in such a short time just knocks her out eventually (i know apollo wanted her to rest but consider: she can't relax). i feel for the most part grace is either acting or considering what to do next. i could say preparing but honestly people keep her in the dark about what she's supposed to do next so often that the most she can prepare is like. preparing herself to face anything jsdnfakjsnd

and so she does! going to a club and facing down a goddess in a song battle? sure. going to the reliquary to find the minotaur? okay. going to a party no one wants to tell her anything about and adapting as she learns? will do. there's no other choice. so she just faces whatever bullshit people throw at her the best she can (as she says in my favorite reply to athena after it's determined there will be a trial, and the one reply i'd keep as canon for my blog: okay, it's unfair but it is what it is. she'll do her best. it's all she can do).

i think the only breakdown she has is very visible and it happens when freddie dies. it's also the one moment i feel she'd falter because to her, her life isn't worth more than freddie's. there's this dialogue option where she says 'it should've been me' that i feel is very fitting with how she'd feel about it. and at least with apollo, his reply ends with something like 'freddie gave you a chance' — that honestly is something i feel would lead her to keep pushing through. freddie died to give her a chance. she won't squander that opportunity, no matter how much she wishes things had been different. it's the least she can do when it's what freddie would've wanted her to do.

other than that, no, she never stops to cry or despair or breakdown even in private. all her energy is dedicated to keep going, no matter what happens. people around her might forget her life is on the line, but she doesn't. they might act like there is time, but she can't, she knows there isn't. it's definitely not stopping to think about it while keeping it as a motivator; a very serious threat that keeps her going but that she won't examine too closely so she won't breakdown.

after the trial, it'd probably take days for the sense of impending danger and the adrenaline and anxiety of being Constantly dealing with something to finally fade. and when it did... well.. that's when i think she'd really start to process it. to cry and feel the weight of it full force and be happy she's alive and be angry she had to go through all that and be devastated about freddie's loss. even then, i'd consider everything that happened pretty traumatic, from calliope dying in her arms to being sentenced to death to having a week to prove her innocence and everything that happens there. it's not like she'd get over it fast. it wouldn't stop haunting her soon after it was done. she can't just forget about it.

she'd definitely be on guard and have trouble sleeping, and i think the restlessness also lingers. i think her keeping herself so busy after the trial is also a means to cope; still not letting herself stop for too long or think too hard about what happened. hoping given time it'll be distant enough she won't have trouble with it anymore.

[queenofbaws]

Hi Queenie!!! Hope you’re doing well! It’s been a pretty rough week emotionally for me so anything super sweet would be very appreciated!

It had been a long, long night of strategic ups and downs, people getting up to 'go get a snack' or 'check on the campers' only to come back and oh-so-foolishly plunk themselves down in a different spot than the one they'd been taking up before...but as movie night wound to a close, there wasn't a Hacketteer in the room that could say it hadn't been worth it.

It wasn't that Abi and Nick wouldn't have ended up sitting next to each other on the lumpy old couch, it was just that they'd needed that first little push, an excuse if you will, and with everyone getting up and moving as they had, it wasn't a surprise they'd ended up bunched up together as they were; they'd spent the better part of the cheesy old kids' movie whispering and giggling to one another, and even though the others hadn't been able to hear exactly what they were saying, there'd been more than a few sneaky looks shared between them as if to say 'Oh yeah, we nailed it.'

That had been then, though, and this was now - the movie was over, the credits were rolling, the lights were low, and both of them were out cold, sleeping like babies. It'd been Abi who'd fallen asleep first, her cheek smooshed against Nick's shoulder and her hair falling over her face, but Nick must not've been very far behind, his head set against hers as if they'd been mid-conversation when he'd conked out.

"Awww, wouldya lookit that," Emma cooed softly, fighting to tamp her laughter down into whispers as she gestured for Kaitlyn to help her spread one of the blankets over the two of them, "I'm getting cavities!"

"Better warn Mr. H before we head back to the cabins," Dylan agreed, not without a low snicker of his own, "I don't know about you guys, but I read the welcome packet, and we're definitely not supposed to leave stuff this sweet out in the open...that's how you get ants, y'know."

six sentence sat(or)sunday!!!

[petricakegames]

Devlog: ECTOCOMP & Bare-Bones Game Jam(s)

Final devlog!! Late night, brain-empty thoughts comin' atcha.

This has been a wild month, but I'm glad to say I have finished 2 games within it. I haven't really parsed how I feel about it--probably because I've spent about 25hrs in the last two days starting and finishing game #2. Proud? Probably proud.

But Laurie, no one asks, what about that game you talked about ages ago? You had cover art for it and everything. You invented (and purchased) merch for it because the idea cracked you up so much. Well, dear player, what happened was I fell really in love with a story that kept growing. I realized if I was going to get it done before the end of October, I'd have to cut a lot of things out of it. I decided it was worth it to do it right. Never fear! The project has been moved to Nano and will (fingers crossed) be published by the end of November. I got about a third of it written, I love the characters so so much and I didn't want to rush them.

I decided that with about two weeks left before the end of the jams. Plenty of time to do another small game and I thought it'd be really neat to get 2 games finished. And I had a ton of ideas--teens break into a Spirit Halloween to do a seance and shenanigans happen; you've been set up on a first date for Halloween and the order in which you, well, order your food determines the ending you get; it's the far-flung future and your a teen on a space ship feeling disconnected from the life you know and a friend found some old Halloween party guides from earth and is throwing a Halloween party--and as much as I liked them, I never found the spark that makes a story catch fire for me. I was ready to be content with the game I had made.

Until 3 days ago. When the opening line "Honey! I've got some hair wrapped around my toes." popped into my head out of nowhere. Suddenly, this horror story develops whole cloth in my mind. And it's...a kind of horror I don't usually engage with. It's uncomfortable to write. I feel a little conflicted about publishing it. It's not about Halloween and I really wanted to make a game about Halloween! But it's done so I am. There are enough narrative things I find interesting that it seems worthwhile to share. And it's pretty good horror.

I still have to finish some backend stuff--write copy for the game page, finish some placeholder text in the game itself. I ended up going with Twine (Harlowe), even though the UI makes me want to cry. I knew I wouldn't be able to figure out pathing and variables well enough to make Ink work (not without something even more clunky than what I've got). And I really needed italics and base Ink doesn't do italics

Anyway, that's all. It's late and I should sleep but I've spent so much brain writing the last couple days I'm enjoying vegging out with youtube. I'll do a post mortem for both games because I have Feelings about them. And I get a whole 2 days without writing nonstop before nano starts! 😂😭 Thanks for reading!

[mdhwrites]

What are some of your favourite headcanons for the Lumischa relationship? How they interact, what they do for dates, all that fun shish.

Okay, so genuinely, I probably would say that The Power of Love is the ideal way I see them as kids, while Future for Lumischa (which I wish I had done more chapters of) is them as adults. But... that also has me need to comment on the one depressing thing for this blog, properly at least rather than just headcanon, and that's that... Boscha wouldn't love Luz's girlfriend Amity. She has no drive, no interest in things besides Luz, has little to no motivation about things besides Luz, etc. like that. She is too submissive and too obsessed to be of interest to Boscha. Boscha would probably see her as someone she could barely have a conversation with. And yes, I know what the show did but Boscha IS going off of a past version of Amity. One who had her own goals, ideas, drive and ambitions. One who could challenge Boscha and those around her instead of just... being there mostly. That Amity IS someone you could admire and have a conversation with and who had their own triumphs and pains to discuss. Honestly, if Luz had first met S2, and especially S3, Amity... I don't even know if she'd be romantically interested since she's shown no romantic interest in Willow.

Anyways, with that out of the way, I'm gonna do this sort of bullet point style just because that will be more fun and try to keep me from rambling too much: Luz and Boscha are much of the only reason Amity ever has real company because Amity is so introverted and focused. Luz actually pulls her away from things while Boscha is more there for Amity, even if the two are quiet. Speaking of: Boscha definitely uses her girlfriends for her workouts. An incredibly common one is Boscha doing pushup while Amity reads on her back. Or 'reads' as it always takes a little bit of time for Amity to stop blushing from the fact that Boscha can have her on her back while doing them one handed. She also deadlifts Luz though that is as often to throw her for being annoying (playfully) as it is to workout. Luz is the one who needs the most affection from the other two and while she has her own room for the sake of studying and the like, she often sleeps with one of the other two whenever she can. Boscha melts from their kisses even up to the age of seventy because she CANNOT handle affection. Luz eventually made it her goal to surprise Boscha with as many kisses as possible once she realized this. Yes this has led to being thrown and some broken bones. Luz always claims it's worth it. Amity is the most terrified of being left out of the polycule. Her parents couldn't love each and there were only two of them. How could they have enough love for her, especially when they have such energy with each other? Luz handles this with extravagant dates on the very rare date nights anyone gets with Amity while Boscha, being more the blunt force type, will take a sad Amity and throw her onto the bed to... love her. In all the ways she likes it. (And as a kid she'd still throw her on the bed but it'd just be for forced cuddles and a break.) Luz buys gifts for the other two whenever she sees something they like. Coincidentally, she is the only one of the three with an allowance. However, Amity also isn't allowed to play any games with microtransactions anymore because she spent three grand in a week for the dopamine drips.

Boscha... eventually drops Grudgby to be a stay at home mom. This actually has a lot to do with the history I gave her but also what I see for the academic/career goals of the other two. Amity wants to be a coven head and in that position she'll help a lot of people and further magic in ways both Luz and Boscha are excited to see. They love the joy her magic brings her and they can see how satisfying it is for her every time she solves a problem, even if they sometimes need to remind her that she can't control everything. Meanwhile, Luz is trying to be a streamer who is open about mental health and her experiences from being bullied and the like while working towards becoming a counselor for troubled teens. Who better to connect to them than someone who has been through so much? Felt so much pain but can genuinely say it does get better? That not everyone is like the nightmares the kids have? And so eventually Boscha looks at all of that and decides that she doesn't want long weeks away from the girls she loves, or to force either to have to stay home to watch the kids they'll eventually have. Not when her goals shifted from being the star that everyone looks at to simply being the rock her family can depend on. As a note, this is similar to why I have her in Future for Lumischa drop her Grudgby plans while the other two are in college so as to work two jobs so they have, you know... money. Speaking of kids though: Luz wants a dozen and is optimistic about being a mom, Amity wants at least two because then they won't be alone when she's never there which might actually be for the best in her mind... And Boscha... Varies depending on headcanon. With PoL's and Future's, she doesn't like talking about it and despite her choice to make sure the kids are never alone and the other two don't have to worry about them, has trouble ever touching them due to the abuse she underwent as a child. With a more positive backstory, I think she'd be a good mom who likes some of their antics and is thought to be scary when upset until her kids get to see what real anger with her looks like the first time something tries to hurt them. Properly as parents, I think Luz tries too hard to relate to her kids and be cool and so isn't really the parent they need, even if she can sometimes be their friend. Amity on the other hand is actually an amazing parent, her focus on what's important letting her be serious about the things that need to be while her gentler side makes sure she knows what to let go of. The only problem is keeping Amity around because she always feels like she's making mistakes and so sometimes actually takes assignments she doesn't need to that take her away from the house so she can't be hurting her kids. This is actually also part of why I like the headcanon where Boscha can't do physical affection with them. One can't be there for the serious parts, one lacks the connection to them because of emotional and physical distance, and one can't give physical affection. They all have weaknesses as parents the others can possibly cover but also allows their kids to choose favorites and the like. And I think for at least this round of headcanons, that's a good place to stop. I don't know why I was so much more focused on them as adults this time though. *shrug* Probably because I've done so much more with them as kids would be my guess. I hope you liked them and I'm always happy to field more Lumischa asks! (Or asks in general since I'm out right now...)

[new-maserati-down-a-dead-end-st]

Freddie nodded as she listened to him tell her about this mythic menu item. "Well, my three cheese grilled cheese and fries sounds boring in comparison. I kind of want a cotton candy milkshake, but I know if I got one, I wouldn't go to sleep until like three am." What she didn't say was that the last thing she needed was to be up late with more time to think of everything that happened. She was sure the Breakup would come up, but she didn't want to be the one to start that conversation, not yet. She set the menu aside. "So. How did you find out about this mythical food item? You said you and your friends talked about it?"

"Three grilled cheese and fries will always be delicious and never be boring," Sawyer assured her, smiling. If the idea of a cotton candy milkshake didn't sound like it'd contain a week's worth of sugar he might've offered to order one and let Freddie steal some sips. But he'd already committed his mind to that Monte Cristo and he could only let himself make one terrible food choice at a time. "I feel like I built this up a little too much. My friend Sorsha found it on the menu and then she, Monroe, and I have talked about the pros and cons of having one. We've tried to guess the texture and flavor profile and… it's just a sandwich that we've given elevated importance to and I have no idea why," he admitted before thankfully the waitress, Dora, stopped at their table with what read to him as a freindly enough smile for the late hour. "Ladies first," he said, gesturing for Freddie to order.