#i’m just kidding to cope

[trials-era-sam]

dccon 2019: jared cancels two days before the con

vancon 2022: jared cancels the first day of the con

next con I go to: jared cancels as I am next in the queue for his photo op

[strawberry-carpcake]

I hate that the atla remake toned down Sokkas sexism for the sake of not being offensive bc honestly I think it’s MORE offensive that it’s not included bc they are basically saying that it’s not important enough to teach those lessons and it’s negative to prevent toxic masculinity 🫶 As a girl I loved seeing the sexism in atla, I loved the lesson that it taught and I loved that all the girls were capable and strong but some of them were STILL FEMININE (cough cough Katara. The new show ruined that too)

While I’m talking about Katara, they ruined her too, not just Sokka. Where’s her rage? Her hurt? Her anger? Let her be angry. She’s 14 fighting in a war, she’s supposed to be mad. I loved her anger it was real and gave her flaws and depth. And also she’s supposed to be motherly. What’s bad about that? There’s nothing sexist about that? Some girls DO want to be that way? Also, it’s supposed to show how she was forced to take the role of her mother as a CHILD bc of the fire nation. It shows the negative effects of war and the loss of innocence, it was so important why is that gone???

[riverspond]

sometimes i pause a little and remember the doctor literally had a whole family. like they had KIDS. a wife. CHILDREN!!!

[godasfarasyoureconcerned]

sad man in crayola

[shadowedvales]

so… in the additional media of stranger things (specifically the comics i’m mentioning), it was initially brenner’s idea/plan to kill off the other test subjects because they weren’t performing as well as eleven was. it was his best solution because that way, all the resources, time, and money could instead be placed only to her. and i just…. sure henry is a fine character and the massacre makes a lot of sense to me, but i think i am once again gonna change up my canon to actually fit this potential narrative instead.

i genuinely think the comic canon of the lab and brenner is far more intriguing than the show. everything with 9/9.5, ricky, and francine. eleven being the only one who grew up completely in the lab. those other kids were either volunteers, well into their teens, or had some semblance of a home life. eleven was the only one practically moulded from the womb. and they all had such a range of interesting powers. i firmly stand with the idea that jane is the only one who can contact the void.

brenner’s entire point of view on the lab subjects changed the second he found out terry was pregnant. he discovered he could steal this baby and make her his own. there would be no convincing the child because it’s all she would have ever known. because of this, i would not put it past a man like brenner to kill the other subjects for the sake of the “greater good” in this case, eleven.

eleven’s gifts just continue thriving beyond his wildest expectations. brenner would never dare assume that having moulded her from the womb, she would still be able to grow into her own person, her own mind, and one day be able to see him for exactly who he was.

back before season four aired, it was obvious there were other test subjects because jane was 011. so there were at least ten kids before her. but i always liked the idea/assumed that she was the last experiment because she was the most successful. that they didn’t need anyone after her because she was fulfilling everything they set out for her to do. with flying colours.

i just think the whole rainbow room idea, pitting the kids against each other thing… been there, done that. boring and predictable. i think at this point my portrayal of her time in hawkins lab really stems from the complete isolation she endured. where having the rainbow room, although eleven was obviously the most isolated out of the kids, brings that sense of community and sister/brotherhood. albeit extremely warped and toxic. knowing that she wasn’t alone in that experience just. doesn’t sit well with me. i think it’s important to note that she was alone, physically and mentally. which is why kali is also so important to her growth. i thought a lot of the flashbacks of her time in the lab during season four was really boring, repetitive, and just very predictable. although peter becoming vecna was a surprise to me, and was a nice little twist, the idea of her having an ally on the inside was really interesting.

maybe they did get as far as they do in canon, peter ballad was telling the truth about everything, about some of the workers there being prisoners like him, and he really wanted to get her out and to safety. but before they can escape through the pipes, they’re caught. peter is shot on the spot, and eleven is put into the isolation room for a few days as punishment. in this timeline, henry would be vecna, but henry would not be peter ballad.

when eleven turned seven, and was already showing extreme promise, where the other children were average at best, brenner had the eight children killed. kali had already escaped. this was the main cause for peter to gain eleven’s trust and try to get her out. because if brenner could murder his “children” in cold blood, there’s no way eleven was safe even in spite of her power.

when eleven is allowed out of the isolation room, her testing becomes more rigorous in attempt to distance and make her forget about what she attempted to do with peter. brenner begins gaslighting her, saying that there was never a peter, that she must have been dreaming. eleven does ask “papa” about “mama”, given peter told her of the day terry broke in the lab, but brenner is convincing enough to make eleven believe it was all in her head. say she is around eight years old, meaning the same timeline of season fours canon flashbacks.

i still do wanna keep the henry creel canon, and keep him as 001. brenner didn’t have him killed alongside the other test subjects, because who knows, one day he could become an even better asset than 011. brenner definitely wants to be able to control henry, but keeps the chip in him because, for the moment, doesn’t know how. killing him would be too big of a loss.

when eleven is ten years old, henry’s concealed powers break free and he manages to get the chip out himself, and unleashes hell onto hawkins lab. he almost kills brenner by snapping his bones, but eleven manages to stop him. her extreme abilities are unleashed, and she sends henry to the upside down. she does fall into a coma due to the extremity of the situation, but she does not forget what happened. brenner believes she’s the perfect weapon as she stepped in to save him without a second thought, was able to defeat henry, and opened a door to something he never thought possible. eleven is rewarded for her efforts. although she remembers the entire battle / confrontation, her memories regarding the portal are very hazy.

brenner decides not to focus on the portal straight away, instead gets her training harder and harder to see what else she can accomplish. also loved the idea of brenner sending her into the void to “look for him” so that will definitely be kept.

by the time she escapes and season one begins, her knowledge of the upside down is basically what we see in canon. because she passed out the moment after she sent henry away, she was once again gaslighted into believing she merely threw him through the glass and killed him. for two years she believed this, until making contact with the demogorgan, and those memories return completely.

due to her saving brenner’s life, (it was pure instinct. she happened to be there. saw her “papa” hurt and knew she had to make him better.) brenner constantly thanks her. but in a very condescending way. tells her: “you saved me so i can continue saving you.” aka, harness your abilities and see what else i can achieve from you. despite the fact that she saved his life, these words and phrases make her feel indebted to him. that she owes him something further.

i don't realistically see her thriving with her speech improvement until she's well into her twenties at least. her slowed development, sensory and social deprivation causes a serious delay in language. surrounded by other children she would have overheard conversations, some would have spoken to her. her conveniently forgetting her upbringing pre the battle with henry just isn't good enough for me anymore. it makes more sense for her to have been raised alone.

it also helps indicate why she gravitated towards the boys when they found her in the woods. they would have been the first people her age she ever remembered seeing. as far as she knew, during the lab there was no one like her. everyone was much older, they were adults-- although she stayed with benny, i'm not sure if she would have stuck around very long. where she followed the boys home without thought.

also it's important to note that after time, jane does understand that peter ballad was a real person, and was truly the first person (aside from terry) who wanted the best for her. when she remembers him, knows that brenner was lying, she deals with immense guilt regarding his death. he was shot right in front of her eyes, because he was trying to help her. this is another catalyst as to why after season two, jane never refers to brenner as papa. she does not give him that sort of credit.

[crazy-fangirl2524]

there’s something so inherently wrong with me when i tick to include major character death in the warning for ao3

[simcardiac-arrested]

once again sorry to everyone for bringing this to your dashboards. but some of you are like, genuinely delirious. not even in a funny way. & i hope you die. i hope we both die. hand in unlovable hand etc etc

[halfyearsqueen]

thinking about her calling her sons ‘ my strength and consolation’

[fifiophobia]

If Nightstar got her own comic storyline, I hope DC explores transgenerational trauma with her.

⚠️ Content warning for parental abuse

Section 1: Her Parents and Gramps

Koriand’r was sold into slavery (some versions she was sold as a child), was experimented on, and is often taken advantaged of due to her kindness.

Dick witnessed both of his parents die, he became a vigilante when he was 10, was physical/mentally/emotionally abused by his adopted father, and he watched Blüdhaven explode.

Bruce watched his parents die, failed to save his son from dying, and struggles with his mental health to the point where all of his relationships have fallen apart at least once.

I’d go on with each member of the Batfam but that would take all day. I picked these three because I feel like these three had the most influence on Mar’i (not to say there wasn’t anyone else who influenced her)

With how these events affected these characters and their relationships, it makes me wonder how it would affect their relationship with Mar’i.

We actually saw Mar’i struggle with her fear of death because of her family’s history with death. Perhaps this could be something to start with.

A trait she shares with Bruce and Dick is obsessive perfectionism because all three of them feel burdened with the task to save everyone. This has resulted in most of Bruce’s relationships to deteriorate, and in Dicks perfectionism. Poor Mar’i would most likely pick up something similar in her life.

Section 2: Breaking the Cycle

Something that isn’t talked about much is how Bruce’s abuse affected Dick and his overall family. If you don’t believe me when I say Bruce abused Dick…

(Unfortunately, Dick isn’t his only victim and Bruce also engages in other types of abuse. Not to mention there are more examples of Bruce hitting Dick and being an overall messy parent and putting Dick through parentification)

Seeing how Bruce’s abuse affected Dick, it makes me wonder how it would affect Mar’i and how he would hurt her. Would he put her through a similar parentification he put Dick through? Or would he do something else

Since Mar’i has some of her moms’ influence, it makes me wonder if she’d put her foot down and confront Bruce about all the terrible stuff she did to the batfam instead of excusing his behavior and blaming herself.

I think she’d be the type to tell Bruce:

“This is why your family doesn’t want to be around you. It’s not because you’re this loner who ended up getting stuck with a bunch of kids against your will, it’s because you’re an emotionally immature coward who takes your pain out on others. How is it you can figure out the biggest mysteries in the world, but you can’t figure out why 10 year olds aren’t good replacements for your parents or therapy!”

I just hope Mar’i breaks the cycle of abuse and perfectionism.

After all, one of Mar’is main motifs (the star) can represent the past, hope for the future, optimism, goals, and our ancestors.

If you have any more suggestions, please let me know.

[glittershvck]

lost my dismas from my v first playthrough while playing through the crimson coart dlc. as you can imagine, i’m emotionally devastated from this and don’t think i will ever recover.

[itspileofgoodthings]

me to Nina yesterday: explaining how due to a headache and exhaustion I wasted away the end of my afternoon just watching Ryan Gosling interviews

Nina, instantly sympathetic: and I completely understand that, a valid thing to do

[robboybot]

In order to reassure customers that the animatronics don’t have children inside them, fredericks fuckeria now offers FREE HYSTERECTOMIES at the famous scooping room so you can be sure there aren’t any inside you either!

[shadowedvales-a]

so… in the extra canon of stranger things (specifically the comics i’m mentioning), it was initially brenner’s idea/plan to kill off the other test subjects because they weren’t performing as well as eleven was. it was his best solution because that way, all the resources, time, and money could instead be placed only to her. and i just…. sure henry is a fine character and the massacre makes a lot of sense to me, but i think i am once again gonna change up my canon to actually fit this potential narrative instead. because,

i genuinely think the comic canon of the lab and brenner is far more intriguing than the show. everything with 9/9.5, ricky, and francine. eleven being the only one who grew up completely in the lab. those other kids were either volunteers, well into their teens, or had some semblance of a home life. eleven was the only one practically moulded from the womb. and they all had such a range of interesting powers. i firmly stand with the idea that jane is the only one who can contact the void.

brenner’s entire point of view on the lab subjects changed the second he found out terry was pregnant. he discovered he could steal this baby and make her his own. there would be no convincing the child because it’s all she would have ever known. because of this, i would not put it past a man like brenner to kill the other subjects for the sake of the “greater good” aka eleven. eleven’s gifts just continue thriving beyond his wildest expectations. brenner would never dare assume that having moulded her from the womb, she would still be able to grow into her own person, her own mind, and one day be able to see him for exactly who he was.

back before season four aired, it was obvious there were other test subjects because jane was 011. so there were at least ten kids before her. but i always liked the idea/assumed that she was the last experiment because she was the most successful. that they didn’t need anyone after her because she was fulfilling everything they set out for her to do. with flying colours.

i just think the whole rainbow room, pitting the kids against each other thing… been there, done that. i think at this point my portrayal of her time in hawkins lab really stems from the complete isolation she endured. where having the rainbow room, although eleven was obviously the most isolated out of the kids, brings that sense of community and sister/brotherhood. albeit extremely warped and toxic. knowing that she wasn’t alone in that experience just. doesn’t sit well with me. i think it’s important to note that she was alone, physically and mentally. which is why kali is also so important to her growth.

i genuinely thought a lot of the flashbacks of her time in the lab during season four was really boring, repetitive, and just very predictable.

although peter becoming vecna was a surprise to me, and was a nice little twist, the idea of her having an ally on the inside was really interesting. maybe they did get as far as they do in canon, peter ballad was telling the truth about everything, about some of the workers there being prisoners like him, and he really wanted to get her out and to safety. but before they can escape through the pipes, they’re caught. peter is shot on the spot, and eleven is put into the isolation room for a few days as punishment. in this instance, henry would be vecna, but henry would not be peter ballad.

when eleven turned seven, and was already showing extreme promise, where the other children were average at best, he had the eight children killed. kali had already escaped. this was the main cause for peter to gain eleven’s trust and try to get her out. because if brenner could murder his “children” in cold blood, there’s no way eleven was safe even in spite of her power.

when eleven is allowed out of the isolation room, her testing becomes more rigorous in attempt to distance and make her forget about what she attempted to do with peter. brenner begins gaslighting her, saying that there was never a peter, that she must have been dreaming. eleven does ask “papa” about “mama”, given peter told her of the day terry broke in the lab, but brenner is convincing enough to make eleven believe it was all in her head. say she is around eight years old, meaning the same timeline of season fours canon flashbacks.

i still do wanna keep the henry canon, and he could easily still be 001. brenner didn’t have him killed alongside the other test subjects, because who knows, one day he could become an even better asset than 011. brenner definitely wants to be able to control henry, but keeps the chip in him because, for the moment, doesn’t know how. killing him would be too big of a loss.

when eleven is ten years old, henry’s concealed powers break free and he manages to get the chip out himself, and unleashes hell onto hawkins lab. he almost kills brenner by snapping his bones, but eleven manages to stop him. her extreme abilities are unleashed, and she sends henry to the upside down. she does fall into a coma due to the extremity of the situation, but she does not forget what happened. brenner believes she’s the perfect weapon as she stepped in to save him without a second thought, was able to defeat henry, and opened a door to something he never thought possible. eleven is rewarded for her efforts. although she remembers the entire battle / confrontation, her memories regarding the portal are very hazy. brenner decides not to focus on the portal straight away, instead gets her training harder and harder to see what else she can accomplish. also loved the idea of brenner sending her into the void to “look for him” so that will definitely be kept.

by the time she escapes and season one begins, her knowledge of the upside down is basically what we see in canon. because she passed out the moment after she sent henry away, she was once again gaslighted into believing she merely threw him through the glass and killed him. for two years she believed this, until making contact with the demogorgan, and those memories return completely.

although henry offering eleven a place at his side wouldn’t be canon, he would definitely still look at her as an enemy for basically stopping his revenge. AND the whole speech between he and jane never sat right with me. jane telling him that brenner hurt him, made him what he was etc. Like. No? henry was a sociopath. he killed his family. in this one instance, brenner didn’t do anything to make him who he was. so jane always saw him for exactly who he was, and there’s absolutely no sympathy there.

[ilygetou]

i broke my laptop

[skeleton-monarch]

yknow some of you have gotten real comfortable mocking hyper-empathetic people because some assholes use it as an excuse to be a dick to those with low/no empathy

you guys do know that hyper empathy can cause issues? like it’s a real thing?? you know this, right???

[boomerang109]

i came home, panicked about one thing, and my toilet was leaking. bathroom floor is covered in water and brown particles. oddly, this has not improved my mood