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jiggery-duggery · 11 months

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I think if I get they/themmed one more time by someone who knows damn well what my pronouns are I’m just gonna go full chimpanzee mode and start tearing peoples faces off

#reggietales #idk. my rage is going to be understood by so few people I might as well not make this post at all #or else this is going to be misunderstood as me being a transphobe and hating they/them pronouns #but like. come on #if you use they for me when you don’t know what mine are that’s fine! that’s fine!#but I fucking told you what mine are and you’ve commented on it you think it’s weird yeah whatever #I’ve got two sets dude pick one I’m not going to be offended by - wow! - someone using the pronouns I told them to use!!!!#idk it makes me feel very small. like #I don’t care about your own unique relationship to gender and how you choose to present I’m going to fit you in a box anyways #apparently people think that they/them is the ultimate pronoun set that no one could EVER be mad about and using they for someone #is NEVER wrong #but fun fact. it is. please use the pronouns I’ve specified I don’t care which set. there’s two of them I’ve even given you a choice #sigh. sorry I’m fucking mad today. lots of small things happened that made me feel like shit #not to be a mean and nasty sjw but please use people’s preferred pronouns. it’s not hard. thanks

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bunnieswithknives · 24 days

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I feel bad for neglecting Hazel so much, I do have many thoughts about her.. and also a mermaid au that im probably not going to do anything with

#fop #fairly oddparents #fop a new wish #fairly oddparents a new wish #hazel wells #fop hazel #fop dev #dev dimmadome #art #digital art #doodles #I wish Hazels parents were more flawed tbh...#Like I get why they wanted to have them be good rep so that young people could know what a good family is supposed to look like #but it felt like every time there was an opportunity to have them do something genuinely flawed-#they would perfectly sidestep it before it even became a problem #I really enjoyed the first episode because it showed a hint of a very unique emotional issue Hazel had related to having a therapist mother #The idea that she has to be mature all the time #constantly living around therapy speak makes her feel like she isnt allowed room to breathe #Feeling unable to express her emotions without someone there giving advice that she isnt ready for yet #just small things!#She feels so pressured to be emotionally mature all the time BECAUSE she gets praised for it #maybe im projecting everyone always tell me I was so mature for my age...#But like I really really wanted to see that from her!!#And then after that episode it doesnt even come up again #The only other episode that features the moms job as a conflict is the one where she wants to spend more time with her #which is a fine conflict I guess but it still ends with her saying all the perfect things #I wanted Markus to be more of a genuine threat too. even if he didnt actually do anything having him be more looming would have been nice #I feel like they mostly forget hes a para scientist most of the time idk.#I just felt like his interactions could have been more unique #Maybe he will be in future seasons idk

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reds-skull · 1 year

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Price plays poker properly only when Ghost is involved

(I don't remember how to play poker so they're also playing wrong now)

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kyonshi-8610 · 2 months

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lifes fleetin do whteve yu want & die 2be a buttrfly aftrwrds

Ta p in to no blurry

#thank u to my gramaw friends who r transwomen in their early 30s-late 40s n took care of me i hold the memories i have of uall so dear #sorry draiwng transfem toshiro made me ee feel so remembering of the past #i've been painting a while so i didnt feel like colorin sorry #dungeon meshi fanart #dungeon meshi #dunmeshi #toshiro nakamoto #nakamoto toshiro #hien #idk if i should tag falin since she has like. very small presence here #veen feling like daytime drinking #anyways i wish there was more acceptance towards falins and toshiros dynamic with eachother bc i think it could b sweet/fun #for me its moreso olatonci abd such .... 2 transexuals who r friends & like bugs & r quiet most of the time #i guess its just bc i grew up w transwomen alongside my life but truly there needs2 bmore asian transwomen in this worldr.....#we need mroe transexuals and bakla and bayot and beki and tibo and tbirds now more thwan ever #i am not a v creative ir imaginaitave perosb so i love all of the peeopler who ware making trans toshiro hcs #it is like bein given bountiful rain duriign a seasons drought .... as a flower is to a bee

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skitskatdacat63 · 1 year

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I would commit murder to see the interview these pictures are from

#im feeling very monza 2011 today i guess!!!#nah but seriously PLEASE I WANT TO WATCH THIS SO BAD #I NEED CONTEXT FOR THEIR INCREDIBLY AWKWARD HUG #let me describe these photos for you bcs they are all just peak vettonso:#the first one where theyre smiling and looking at each other 🥰🥰🥰#and the second where theyre both smiling at the interviewer(?)#third and fourth i describe as: twink about to pounce #like seriously seb what is he talking about that is making you look at him like you want to eat him #fifth is sending me like ITS SO AWKWARD AND I LOVE IT #just my fav thing about 2010s vettonso where seb is so excitable and touchy and etc #and nando is like: i dont want to be here rn get him off me DJKFLGL #stop it Fernando. i know you want to.#and then last one idk i really like it. you guys know how i feel abour chairs.#i guess to me theres something about how differently they're sitting #like seb is more open and relaxed and Fernando is a lot more curled up and small #ANYWAYS WHERE IS THE VIDEO OF THIS 😭😭😭😭 I NEED IT #this actually adds to my bafflement abt their dynamic at this gp #bcs this is how the race wknd starts off and isnt it truly wonderful? that fernando then says 3 days later: fuck u my boy #f1 #formula 1 #sebastian vettel #fernando alonso #vettonso #2011 italian gp #we do a little bit of f1

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perilegs · 1 month

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i know astrology is fake but i'm not too keen on how a lot of people on this website seem to be clowning on it as a hobby a bit too hard. i swear the woman who thinks it's neat how she and her friends with the same sun sign are all similar isn't trying to say that you are who you are born as and there is nothing you can do to change it. it's a hobby. an interest. what happened to finding meaning and joy in the small things. does it affect you if someone enjoys tarot reading or crystals. does it make you upset someone has interests that they enjoy.

#im not saying astrology/tarot/crystals/etc. get clowned on so much bc theyre hobbies mostly enjoyed by women But....#i saw a post about some astrology study and made the mistake of opening the notes on that bad boy #not fun. and that reminded me of that old post that was basically like ''liking astrology is transphobic''#anyways idk maybe its just that my bestie is very much a ''crystal girl'' but like. stuff like that are such neat hobbies #she makes some cute little jars with pretty rocks and they make her feel better bc if you believe in something you can make it happen #when it comes to small things #like yeah if you pick up a stone that's like ''this can help you be more open with your emotions'' and you are like ''oh hell yea!''#ofc that will be on your mind and the item will be a constant reminder and actually help you with your goals #and its like. ok what really stuck with me was when i was talking with my bff and i was like ''i think all this stuff is interesting but i #feel bad bc i am superstitious and believe in some signs like lucky numbers but i know that logically its just. if i pick a lucky number of #i pay extra attention to it but i want to believe its lucky but i know how human brains work in that aspect''#and she was just like. ''so? those things dont have to exclude each other'' and it clicked #if i have a little tigers eye with me it does not make me feel more grounded magically #but if i decide (or believe) it's grounding then it will b bc it's a reminder for me to calm down #and stuff #like. ah idk how to put my thoughts into words #but i just think its unfair that a few rotten apples have ruined the perception of fun hobbies for a lot #not every astrology enjoyer is trying to sell you mlm essential oils or genuinely believe peoples entire lives are dictated upon the stars #or something #idk i just feel like these things are v misunderstood even tho im not personally like super into them myself #but ppl super mean about that stuff arent invited to look at my medieval themed fortune telling cards #idkk im sleepy and cant articulate my points someone else say this but better #leevi talks #im just saying. i dont think its bioessentialism to decide to believe you personally have a season for growth when the stars are in a #certain position or whatever

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lucydacusgirl · 4 months

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It was quite worrying walking down the main shopping streets of my city during pride and seeing that barely any of them have any pride flags or anything in the window. Rainbow capitalism will not save us but it is so unnerving when even last year most shops had some kind of bunting in the window and this year it was only three or four. Like idk it feels emblematic of a worsening or idk souring attitude towards queer people that is definitely influenced by rampant transphobia in the uk. Which is why it’s so upsetting when cis queer people join in on transphobia in hopes of distancing themselves from the current social and political undesirability of transness.

#idk idk it just makes me nervous when businesses won’t even trot out a bit of rainbow bunting for one day #like I don’t need McDonald’s to pretend to love gay people but it really does feel like showing support of lgbt people is now seen as a #liability rather than profitable #and I think that that’s ultimately a step back?#idk there’s been a lot of Christian proselytising in town that has been really like gathering audiences and engaging people when most people #used to ignore it and walk right past it and it all just feels a little bit scary #when i say Christian proselytising i mean explicitly homophobic Christian proselytising #which also just sucks to have to hear on your way to work.#I’m a fucking person not a sign of the end times #anyway I had a good time and my city’s pride is quite small and very sweet and it was a good day but like. uh oh.#this has all been said before and better by other people

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izloveshorses · 1 year

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it’s so beautiful to me that what triggers anya’s memory of her past isn’t some big national secret or something inherently tied to the politics of her family or even her social class, it’s just a simple sensory detail of sitting in a carriage on a hot day and catching sight of a boy running after them

#anastasia broadway #anastasia musical #anastasia #dimya #i mean i get that this is the whole point of iacot alksdfj #but like #it's just a small thing?? and that feels so much more honest??#idk #also like #i know she has Been Through It but the narrative is so gentle to her #like this is just such a kind and gentle way to be reintroduced to who you used to be you know??#even though the song ends on a sad note it's still a very safe and comforting environment #a boy talking about a hot summer day and it turns out you were there too #and then we can get into the fact that the way he tells stories is exactly what she needed to unlock her memory #bc he uses sensory memories and specific details in the same way we remember childhood #like we don't think about the Overall Things going on at the time but we remember the way the food smelled or the texture of the clothes etc #and that's a much more interesting and Real story to me than anything else they could have done #letting this girl who has survived and endured so much have a moment to just. be. and letting her think about ribbons and a boy #which is why when ppl try to make her a figure either sympathizing with or against the revolution it doesn't work for me #bc it's not a show about revolution it's a show about a girl remembering the way her nanna smells when she hugs her #and in this context. that matters more #idk it's a story for the girls!!!!!#for the girls who don't remember everything but they remember their grandma's perfume and the way the carpet felt under her feet!!

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jemmo · 3 months

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i really wanna give podd a round of applause bc he’s managed to make ter a character that i hate so specifically and immensely

#I don’t even know what it is #like in the grand scheme of bl he’s not exactly the worst guy out there #he’s just so…. that type of guy yknow #idk if it’s bc im preping for the eras tour next week but he’s the kind of guy Taylor swift could write about very well #just like… small and annoying and selfish and too confident for his own good #just self important typical man to a T #the fact that Dee’s confession makes him feel good like look at me receiving love that makes me feel great and important #but im not going to return any of that #instead I’ll only start acting like I care when there’s the possibility im not his favourite anymore #even though I have no right to that place #and as soon as I decide that I want to be his favourite again im going to make it happen with no respect for how Dee actually feels #and my god the way he makes yak feel so unimportant #by making him think knowing Dee for longer gives him this huge advantage #when time doesn’t mean shit when your actions for all that time have done nothing for Dee #yak has more care for Dee in his little finger than he does #and it’s the way he just meddles in to this situation all self important when it has nothing to do with him #and expects Dee to just fall at his feet like… ugh #he’s just the worst #well done podd for showing how men can be pricks #wandee goodday

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cerealmonster15 · 3 months

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haikaveh... save me haikaveh...

i KNOW it's been talked about to death but. the haikaveh research project. it literally haunts my mind. i cannot get over the implications. alhaitham going through his school life as someone that most people dont even really know about because he keeps to himself and doesn't socialize, with kaveh being the one exception to that, finding his way into his life as his Best Friend, and then leading to alhaithams one and only time he participated in a research topic. his bio says he only ever did ONE joint project!!! one!!! the one with kaveh his best friend and i think also his only friend at the time!!!! and then it ended in not only the project falling apart but also alhaithams only friendship. kavehs best friendship. they were each others closest person. they had no family around - alhaithams parents having died when he was young and his grandmother dying before he joined the akademiya, and kaveh's dad dying when he was young and his mom having moved to fontaine. like even if you dont look at it through a romantic lens it's still undeniable how important they were [and are] to each other..........

i'm getting off track but my point is very specifically for alhaitham, the one time he got close to someone, made a friend, even agreed to join one(1) group project ever, it ended in disaster. it led him into a fight so bad that his one and only friend said he regretted that friendship!!!! it was so bad alhaitham left the project and he and kaveh didnt speak for ages until they just happened to run into each other again at the tavern!!!!! like obviously it has to be incredibly awful for both of them but i just think how this probably had alhaitham in the cynical mindset that friendships and collaborations like that might just never work out for him because the one time he let someone into his life, it blew up on him and he was all alone again. even though alhaitham never seems to care much if people dont like him, that clearly cant still apply to someone he was exceptionally close to. like if he didnt care he woudlnt have been the one to take his name off the project and mutually not speak to kaveh...... kavehs words are the ones that hit the most significantly to alhaitham.......... kaveh is said/implied to have had at least some other friends while at school / people knew who he was, but not so much alhaitham. people didnt know him and the ones that did just knew he didnt socialize/he was not easy to get along with. he only had kaveh and then, for a while, he lost him too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

#the number of times i have reread alhaitham character story 4 and kaveh character story 5. like. dont look at me. kfjsdklfh #on one hand im tempted to think alhaitham would have a fully cynical view of friendship #and be like USELESS NEVER AMOUNTS TO ANYTHING but. i kinda dont think he works like that #well i dont think he would think that either way now but #even in times of friendship breaking up w/kaveh like #alhaitham is very FACTS AND LOGIC and i feel like he would still like #idk. understand the objective value of human companionship. whether or not he feels it works for him #HOWEVER. jkdlhfsd he is also the one who in his other lore bits was like 'grandmother the other children are boring at school'#AT AGE SEVEN god he was probably such an unintentionally funny child. i love u alhaitham u are so neurodivergently coded #so idk i feel like he would have a period where hes like okay. i was alone before and clearly that was the right call bc my 1 friend is gon #even if he does well alone i cant even imagine like. kaveh mustve been a huge impact and difference in alhaithams life #humans need SOME level of socialization!! and kaveh was his.... aughhh god they literally also read as having a bad breakup!!!!!#queer coded TO ME!!!!!! friends to rivals/friends to lovers to enemies to it's complicated..................#but again even if u dont think of it in a romantic sense like it's still so much. they were and are so significant to each other.#their bond is so complex and oughghdhgh they make me go bonkers #i do not think of any other 2 genshin characters so intensely as i do them .what have they done to me. what the fuck.#im alone in my stupid little genshin pit endlessly babbling about these motherfuckers!!!!!!!#and i love them. also i like that one scene in i think cynos 2nd character quest where al and kav r in the library or w/e #and kavehs like wtf no way u dont small talk w/coworkers. and alhaithams like no i just happen 2 hear people but i do not engage #hes so real he likes to eavesdrop but he does NOT want to get involved!!!!!!!!!!!!#also that same scene where kaveh goes 'WTF looking thru these will take FOREVER!!!!' alhaitham: 'ill manage'#kaveh: >:( FINE ILL HELP YOU!!!! like ok he did not ask. silly.#and alhaitham teasing him right after all that. 'teach me to pretend u werent listening' '...' '...' '...' '...HEY STOP IGNORING ME' 'see.'#theyre so goofy. kaveh u walked right into that one. ily.#i love when i talk about characters and it's literally just me going 'wow remember when character x said this. remember when he did that.'#i just love repeating scenes and dialogue and lore over and over and over and offering nothing new to say about it JKFLDSHKLFH #sorry i love them SO much and im bad at drawing and bad at fanfic so i just have to ramble in text posts forever #i do have. a fanfic outlined for them. i am just scared to write it #nothing crazy deep or whatever but yknow. im in a bit of a Funk Right Now dont worry about it #i need a constant stream of alhaitham and kaveh content constantly injected directly into my brain.

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faaun · 6 months

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pls i need to provide updates

#basically yesterday night was chaharshanbe suri . which is a solar new yr tradition where we let go of the past suffering in our year #and like...start the new yr w fresh vigour . anyway so my friend was at the event and we were abt to leap over the fire #and she was like bro im im glad u blocked her (situationship) etc etc . and then. my phone started vibrating. and i look at it. and my f #friend looks at it. and its her. and were both like what the fuck?? i blocked her things r Over and anyway so i pick up the phone and shesl #acting like nothing happened (bc nothing DID happen for her) and she was like ohh ur doing chaharshanbe suri im not doing anything etc what #are ur new yr plans so i jusr .IDK WHY I DID THIS . but ig i didnt wanna come off as like lonely i said probably hanging out w family and #friends maybe reading poetry together . et cetera and she was like wait that sounds so fun why didnt u invite me!#LIKE WDYM YOUVE BEEN CONSISTENTLY MAKING IT CLEAR U DONT WANT TO BE IN MY PRESENCE . and i told her that after #everything i thought she didnt want to see me again and she was like you always think that 😐 . like. ?? ok anyway so she expects me to #invite her . and like. there is an above 0% but sub-5% chance she will actually show up . but the panic that gripped me #i started making calls to my friends asking them if they can come on the 23rd bc there must be an event and also i asked my mother #and she said actually yeah i am doing a thing on the 23rd :D it involves over 16 ppl (we live in a v small flat) of which like...7 are kids #so you wont have space to be in ur own room let alone invite others. which tbh like ...being around a bunch of loud kids doesnt seem fun fo #any of my friends or me etc so i thought maybe i should arrange things so that we all go out together and if she shows up she shows up 🤷‍♀️#but . im so. WHY DID I SAY THAT . i had to panic-call my research partner and ask him to get from oxf to where i live on the 23rd #and when he heard the explanation he like. the light in his voice disappeared 💀 but he potentially agreed so idk #THE ISSUE IS. 23rd im supposed to also have . a date #w this girl that i had a huge crush on when i was 15-16 (posted abt this b4 but id get shitty black coffee in the mornings just to spend a #few more minuted w her each day and she was the cleverest girl in school and she cared abt nothing but her academics but now shes very gay #scraggly homosexual etc etc shes cute) and YEAH IDK #like id have to go there on the date come back fast meet ppl POTENTIALLY (again under 5%) meet situationship girl #like is that even doable #but the thing is it would be so so so funny bc all of my friends dislike her sooo much #.........what if i invited the girl im supposed to have a date w over to hang out w us #god that would be so hilarious and chaotic . i wont do it tho im a mature person x #but it would be soooo funny #I HAVE AN ASSIGNMENT DUE TMRW 12:30PM IT IS 10:49PM RN I HAVENT STARTED IT bc i was rotting sadly in bed #popped a ritalin pill tho so here we go x #i have found myself in a state of such sheer agony and rage and sorrow and grief over this girl that atp i feel like #its just so entertaining . like i feel vaguely over it? ik nothing will come of it so its like just . have fun . vibe

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derpinette · 8 months

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girls being nice to me gets me higher than ecstasy ever could

#SORRY for the corny post but this is how i truly feel not waxing poetic here like literally it does #i just met the cool girl i keep talking about & IT WAS SÅ FREAKEING ÅSUM ^_^_^_^_^_^ YAY #HAPPY HAPPY JOY JOY HAPPY HAPPY JOY #OK sorry for screaming But i really am very excited...#turns out she is autistic & we discussed our neuroses while eating & ugh she is just as cool as i thought she was #always tell people you think have Swag that you noticed it on them see how it worked for me #i was so scared of spilling my spaghettis but turns out that was exactly what i needed to do to be friends ^_^ YAY #we went to a lot of different libraries together & i got a small old eyeless bunny plush from the event we went to caus i felt bad for it #i even showed her my pony art & i told her about my cringe interest (that music event i like...♯RealOnesKnow )#& she thought it was COOL.& i felt like it was really genuine & she talked about reading BL LOL we discussed fujos together #we even talked about finding moids ugly #it was so awesome she was so cool & Nice To Me... i feel like i am on CUMULONIMBUS ( cloud 9 ) ^_^_^_^_^_^#talking to her in person was so much better than online OMG now i wish i really was friends with you muties IRL #i wish you a Girl Friend experience just like this to those who post about wanting them i really do #also the reason why i even like my Music Event so much is because the first time i watched it was with a bunch of women #& i had so much fun & they were so nice to me i keep returning & now that Event means so much to me & I LOVE IT sorry (NOT)#i know this sounds like tumblrina fiction i would not believe it either IDK what to say to make it sound legitimate 0_0 like it is so crazy #to me as well IDK i can barely get over it & IDK if i really want to so um well YAY ^_^ AIMU SO HEPI :DDD

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solei-eclipse · 1 month

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@pwippy DING DING DING WE HAVE A WINNER 🎉🎉🎉🎉

so fun fact. I originally had an idea for an ALNST spirited away AU (and a long list of other media I'm into in an ALNST AU)

But after I drew these and looked at their little faces I simply could not bring myself to go any farther. These poor kids do not deserve that 😭 especially chihiro I was so hurt at the thought of anything bad happening to her that I scrapped the thought immediately

I was still interested in their post movie dynamic (specifically the bits and pieces we get of haku's past + the fact that chihiro forgets everything once she leaves the tunnel) and it lingered on me after I watched the movie

these ocs are just me trying to explore a different flavor of that dynamic + traits from a few other pieces of media that I enjoy

#i believe toon also guessed #anyways sorry guys i am horrendously unsubtle #and also #spirited away meant a lot to me back then and it means a lot to me now #haku and chihiros post movie dynamic interested me #so i took them. broke them in half. threw them into a blender and made something outta the main concept #also jiu is very blatantly haku coded but kio is slightly more detached from chihiro #they have their own junk that separates them from og chihiro haku #honestly life and work has been beating my ass lately #i went back to rewatch this movie and i cried like a baby because all the themes are so painfully poignant #like as a kid i was like woah magic #and now watching it i feel like that meme of coralines dad at the computer screen #so when making new ocs naturally theyd seep in #HEAVILY #even entering young adulthood i still feel like chihiro yelling for her parents and crouching down small near the river 😭#sorry for yapping idk where that came from

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lemon-wedges · 1 month

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...

#finished mid season #and its like #they really are pairing off everyone huh #bUT LIKE OK #fIRESKY????#im still like #suprised how wholesomely sweet they are #ryan and karina are also very good?#he took her to go see her friends....he apologized....he called her the best hero.....whu...hime......#the other ones tho.....hmmmm....#like i guess bison origami is ok #the shirtless scene did a LOT of the heavy lifting #kid kat is cute but also makes me feel like im watching tiny tots or something #black and white tho.....#i.....i dont care 😔#its like if tiger and bunny where more annoying and had NO sauce #i think they have some fun moments with the rest of the cast but #i think because they didnt get a proper intro focus theyre misisng build up #ryan got the movie and its fun watching him switch partners and also interact with barnaby without the tnb break up #hmmmm idk #tiger if he didnt have emotional intelligence and bunny if he didnt have his stage persona #also like #in the end t&b 2.0 have to have to same character arch beats #black has to take a hit for white to trust him #white has to have a moment where he loses hope and get proven wrong #blah blah blaj #whatever small moments they have reconciling and getting along wILL NEVER BE mid season 1 dinner party where bunny keeps glancing at tiger #and follows him outside so they can talk about their dreams under the stars and street lights #and bunny gives tiger a smile when he finds out what tigers biggest wish is......#😑 anyways i need to draw barnaby in love again excuse me

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dirtytransmasc · 1 year

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no cause miles is just so young.

he calls his dad, cause he's scared and upset and overwhelmed and he just wants to hear his voice.

he hugs him, even when he's "not supposed" to, when he's not his son and instead spiderman, when his dad has no idea who he is and only sees a vigilante.

when he hugs his dad, he presses into his chest, cause he's too short to rest his head on his shoulder, and he squeezes his eyes shut, cause he's no doubt about to cry (and we can't really see it, but I'm pretty sure he can't fully wrap his arms around his dad, which kills me).

when he dad hugs him, he's practically able to fit Miles's head in his hand. and the way he ran into him in a split second, and before his dad even knew what was wrong, he just held him????

I can't do this today, he's just so little, he's a baby, and he's been through so much, it's not fair, just look at him, what did he do to deserve any of this?

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jrueships · 1 month

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r u the grew up poor never being able to buy the little things in life u always wanted as a kid so now u buy whatever little thing u want as an adult and struggle with saving for the big mandatory thing,

or the grew up poor never being able to buy the little things in life u always wanted as a kid so now u just never buy anything small bcs u had to learn to live without it and constantly try to save for the next big thing in 500 yrs

#everyones been asking what i wanted for my bday and i always say nothing #like i hate the feeling of getting somebody smthing just to get them smthing like personally #it needs to come from the heart for me. if it's for smthing big like a bday #now like getting someone a coffee judt to get them one on a random day is dif bcs it's just smthin random on a random day i can understand #but idk like as a kid into adulthood the only bday my relatives / guardians have ever celebrated was my adopted brother's n my dad's #the dad bcs hes a hyperconservative dictator lol n the older adopted bro is cus hes got higher needs #so everybody gets more money taking care of him n stuff so u gotta act like u care abt him according to the guardians #but like i never even knew bdays were that big to people. like i mean i know OTHER PEOPLES bdays are big to them #i find ppl who rlly love their bdays to be rlly cute. like i dont think theyre selfish or make fun of em cus theyre judt having fun #n like u only get one x yr bday so have fun with it!!#but for ME? my bday was never anything special n i dont think it is now #everybody feels bad or smthing for me or for not getting me nothing today but it's like?? this is the norm??? im cool with it #ive been thinking abt other stuff like i just dont have time to think abt the pleasures rn. i have to double on the pain or smthing #like my friends always laugh abt how i dont drink coffee/tea or alcohol bcs u cant be in the medical field without a lil smn smn #& it's like idk ! i like ppl that do do that kinda stuff but like! i never grew up with that & it just feels odd to do it now kinda thing #idk im very cheap but also i will use the fact that im cheap on the small stuff to justify wanting to make a big purchase #i have a weird relationship with buying things for myself vs for others like 4 others i will buy watever u want bro #sugar papi ted #hey heres this idk insert raccoon bracelet bcs u like raccoons n love wearing bracelets so i thot of u n bought it #but if i buy smthing for me it has to have a dual purpose or smthing #i got to have a free dessert today n chose the churros over the tres leches cake slicr cus u can judt make the cake #but i dont own a deep fryer so i cant make churros n storebought churros just arent the same #like im just always idk comparing or needing to know the use of things yanno #if i do smthing. i have to see it thru. & it has to have multi purpose #i mean just look at my username jrue ships or jrue's hips like #im unwell when it comes to that #idk is anyone else like this #anyways yea this whole new thing of getting stuff on one day is hard for me like it just never matches up with my time #of course ill see stuff id like to have but like. ill just make myself forget it n by the time stuff like this rolls up it's like idk #i COULD get a new laptop but i got one that works just fine. i got an ipad on its last legs but can i still turn it on? alright

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