#im super high guard about that now and can barely close an eye in a vehicle without shaking. but. now that thats plausible.

[firebuug]

the stupid thing about anxiety that leans into straight up paranoia territory is that you can be weirdly paranoid and expectant of something terrible, worst case scenario ever to happen like, all the time, but since it's never happened to you you know it's unreasonable. but the moment one of the things you're crazy about actually happens, all those other extremely way more unreasonable things suddenly become plausible in your head by association, so now you're just on guard ALL the time. it's like throwing your anxiety a bone and because it was good that time and did a good job of preparing you for it now it's like ok! I will do this for everything else too and i will do a good job. but really it just needs to be put down

[league-of-thots]

Leave Me a Message

Pairing: Hawks x reader

Warnings: angst, swearing, some suggestive themes, um gl with this? im told by my beta it was very sad

Words: 9.4k 

A/N: so um. this happened. First off, if you’d like to go break your heart some more, go check out the MASTERLIST because everyone worked super hard on these and there are some really amazing writers.

Og, this was supposed to be 3k, and then it just kept going and im suffering ok jesus that was so long. it was also kind of a way for me to get out some of my own inner turmoil around some stuff and i fucking loved writing it. ...not to be lame but yes i did cry writing it (shhh) anyways, i hope you enjoy? as much as you can enjoy angst of course.

         Hawks doesn’t do commitment. He’d said that from the start, that he wasn’t out looking for someone to try and grab his heart from out his chest, that he was simply looking for someone to keep his body company. He told you that he was tired of the press making a big deal of him being single, that all you would have to is hang out with him a bit, dates and couple things. He said that he’d been missing some company, that it would be amazing to have someone to spend some of his (very little) time off of patrol with. It was simple to you, who wouldn’t take the opportunity to be on the arm of a successful pro hero? Who would turn down the chance to learn more about the elusive Hawks, the one who’d baffled the media’s attempts to discover anything about him at all?

         You told yourself you weren’t going to make the mistake of getting attached, he was the number two hero after all, he had so much choice. There was no way you were going to be an idiot about it, this was only for some curiosity about the man.

         You enter the bar, a little awestruck at how clean and upscale it was. Of course, it wasn’t too surprising given the fact that this was the number 2 pro hero. He was bound to have some cash to throw around for a good time, plus he’d already told you that he’d be paying for the night.

         How could you refuse him?

         The night started out slow, the two of you lightly discussing regular day to day topics, but it intrigued you how carefully he spoke about everything. You didn’t really know him but you could’ve sworn that he had a plan with everything that he said, that everything he did was carefully calculated. To be honest, it was a little chilling, but as the alcohol started flowing along with the conversation, he relaxed a bit and you had to admit that he was a really fun person to talk to.

         The two of you had gotten closer in the circular booth as the night had gone on, blaming the loud surroundings and dim light so that you could see and hear each other better. He had this dry wit that left you struggling for breath as you laughed at his jokes and his teasing. He seemed to be enjoying himself too, but honestly, you couldn’t really read him at all.

         It was getting into the wee hours in the morning when the conversation took a more serious turn, the conversation starting to be about what this was, and what this would be.

         He was quite direct that he’d make it worth your while

“No offense, love, but if I’m being completely honest, I’m just not good at relationships. They’re not my thing. But I’m lonely and bored, and honestly? You caught my eye.” He’d said this in a low voice to you at the bar, his breath tickling your ear and you flutter your eyelashes up at him.

         “Are you asking me for a night of fun, Mr. Hawks?” you say coyly.

         “Maybe a night, maybe more if I like you.” He leans in to whisper to you, “You’ve got a pretty good chance babe.”

         “You’re not worried about me not liking you?” you weren’t really taken aback; it was to be expected from the number two hero that if you came to meet him, you were interested in him for sure.

         He leans back, with his hands behind him. “If I’m reading your body language right, and I’m pretty good at that y’know, then I’d say you’ve been pretty excited the whole night.”

         You laugh a bit at that. “Well, you’re not wrong I guess.”

         “Then I have nothing to worry about at all.”

           Your arrangement with Hawks started as a few dates in more secluded public areas, the first being a movie which you’d taken a bus to get too. When you’d gotten there, you went inside like he had asked you too. There, you saw him in the furthest corner, trying to be as inconspicuous as possible. It wasn’t working well and you had to stifle a giggle as you walked up to him.

         The only reason that people didn’t seem to be coming up to him was the fact that the normally upbeat and friendly hero was closed off, and looking rather downtrodden.

         “Hey, Hawks.” You say, bumping his shoulder with your own playfully. “How’re you doing.”

         “Better now that you’re here,” he smoothly slips his arm into yours, face morphing into a slightly happier expression. “Would you happen to be a fan of popcorn and a drink at the movies, Y/N?”

         “Of course! How can you have one without the other?” He smiles at that, a quick upturn of his lips and its quickly gone again as he guides you to the counter to get some snacks and drinks. It wasn’t supposed to be an incredibly exciting movie, but it was supposed to be decent enough that the two of you could enjoy it together and relax without really having to push through any awkward tension that could still be around with the two of you being relative strangers.

         It was like a neutral ground to start off the fake relationship, while the two of you could learn about one another. It had to look real in public after all, Hawks wanted people off his back.

         Although, the last night the two of you had spent together after the bar had certainly been real. It had also left you so sore you could barely walk the next day, but that was another story for another day.

         The two of you sit down in one of the further rows, but not in the back. You have a good view of the screen; you notice as you sit down with Hawks.  You look over to him, and see that carefully guarded neutral expression on his face again. It’s almost as if there’s a mask he has under the skin of his face, that snaps back into place whenever it falters for a little, or he actually shows something of his true thoughts.

         It was almost eerie how well he did it, how second nature it seemed to him. No wonder the press couldn’t get shit on him, you thought, he’s not exactly an open book to read, and he’s actively trying to make it harder for people. You wondered if it was just because he preferred his privacy or if he had a really big secret that he felt he needed to keep.

         That was almost amusing, thinking the reason Hawks was so mysterious is some large secret that there was pressure on him to keep.

         The opening previews shook you out of your thoughts, seeing one for a book to movie adaptation that was coming out soon and you were super pumped to see. It had your favourite director working on it, and they said they’d worked closely with the author during the script writing process you and were really hopeful that it would turn out well.

         You looked to Hawks to whisper this to him in excitement and he leans over so you could whisper it so as to not disturb the people around you. When you’re done, he turns to whisper back in your ear, “Guess we’ll be back at the movies soon then.” He watches your face become a bright smile, a little heat in your face from excitement and a little embarrassment as he was giving you his full attention as you fangirled a bit.

         The movie was actually pretty decent, you thought during the middle of it. The acting carried the script though, and they were lucky at how much chemistry there was between the actors given most of them hadn’t done movies with each other before. A little way after that, Hawks leaned back in his chair, actually more relaxed than you’d ever seen him before, as he brought his arm back around you. You rolled your eyes at the little cliché he’d performed, but still found it sweet. You could feel the warmth he gave off and it made you feel comfortable and safe.

         After the movie, the two of you parted ways, but not before he gave you a sweet kiss on the cheek, and the promise to see you soon.

         “I’m going to be really busy the next few weeks, so it might be a little while before we can do something like this again.” He warned, “Things are really picking up with criminal activity and such.”

         “If you were going to be so busy you should be at home resting,” you scold, and then your eyes widen in shock at what you’d just blurted out. “I, uh- I mean…” you try to recover but Hawks was laughing hard.

         “Trying to get rid of me so soon? I thought the date was pretty fun, myself.” He teases, seeing what you’ll do next.

         “It was! Just um-, you’ve got to be safe out there and stuff. So, you should get your rest, I would understand if you had to cancel because of that.” You finish a little lamely.

         “That’s very sweet, Y/N, it really is. But honestly? Doing something like this is way more of a recharge for me. Makes me relax a little bit. So, thank you for the nice date. That is if you’ll have me?” he cocks an eyebrow with a crooked smile.

         “Of course, now go get some sleep, bird brain.” He chuckles, and with a wave he’s off, streaking through the air. You’re hit with a bit of a gust of wind, but seeing him fly up close? Totally worth it.

         You turn around and start walking to the bus stop that’ll take you back home, it had been quite a good date and you were in high spirits.

         You could see this whole arrangement working out quite well for you, if that first date was anything to go by.

           The fourth date was the one that he really started to show you what actually lay beneath the mask that he put on all the time. The two of you had been texting over a few weeks, and because he was so busy, a couple short get togethers happened, but this was the first time he had a whole day off for a long time.

         The topics the two of you had been texting about varied to asking simple questions about what kind of tea was your favourite, to what you thought would happen to you after you died. That had been a weird night, but you saw the next day it had been because Hawks had been on patrol and had been unable to completely save people from a villain. It had been one person out of hundreds, but you could feel his guilt through the screen.

         Among the lighter topics though, you found out that Hawks hadn’t really ever learned how to cook or bake. He said that he never learned from anyone, so he mostly did takeout and easy to make meals. You decided it would be fun to teach him how to bake, there were a few sweet treats that were easy enough to do. Certainly, he’d be able to handle it, you thought, especially since he made so many other difficult things look easy.

         Hawks, in fact, could not handle it, you’d later find out.

         The doorbell rings, and you take off your apron that you’d been wearing to get the baking started so that it wouldn’t take as long. There was still a fair amount of work to do, and the icing had to be made. You’re really hoping he enjoys it, it’s a new idea and you’re a little nervous.

You greet him and take his coat to hang it up as he takes off his shoes, he’s wearing cargo pants and unmatching socks, one pink and the other grey, along with a black t-shirt. You let him look around a bit before directing him to the kitchen a little nervously.

“Um, so I was thinking because you said you’d never really baked before that we could try and make a little something?” you’re fiddling with the hem of your shirt as he grabs your hands to stop you from doing that.

“That sounds like a really fun idea, Y/N. It’s really cute.” He gives you a quick smile as you smile at the praise. “Now. What are we making Chef?”

You giggle a bit at that. “I was thinking a carrot cake with some buttercream icing.”

“Well that doesn’t sound easy.” You shush him.

“It is! And I’ve already done some of it, so we can eat it sooner.”

He looks unconvinced. “I don’t know if I can handle this.”

“It’s baking,” you scoff. “You save people for a living, I’m pretty sure you can handle some baking.”

Famous last words, the start wasn’t to bad, Hawks fallowing your instructions carefully. It was when he got confident that he first fucked it up.

“So, now all you have to do is whip this with the blender for a few minutes around the bowl. When it starts getting a thicker consistency let me know, because that’s when you have to hand do it.” You’d decided on cinnamon rolls with a nice smooth icing on top that would become a glaze.

“Got it,” he chirps, putting the metal parts of the hand mixer in the bowl before starting it up and putting to medium high like you’d instructed him to do. “Maybe you were right, sweets, this isn’t too bad.”

“See? Even a bird brain like you can get it!” you laugh.

And then it happened.

After you said that to him, he turned around to give you a playful spank on the ass, forgetting he’d been holding the bowl on the counter in place with his hand. At the same time, he lifted the hand holding the mixer.

You both let out a sharp cry of surprise, you from getting slapped and both of you from the loud crash and the bowl goes flying and the icing gets flung everywhere. You look at him slack-jawed as he frantically turns off the hand mixer and gives you a sheepish look.

“Oops?” he says with a nervous smile.

“Oh. My god.” You get out before you start laughing so hard you’re keeled over, your stomach starting to hurt. “What the fuck Hawks? Hahah! How did you manage to get the bowl to fly that far!”

He scratches his hair and laughs along with you. “I’m actually really unsure, I honestly thought that I was going to get through this without messing it up. Sorry I ruined the icing, Y/N.”

You wave your hand. “It’s fine, cinnamon rolls are still good without the toppings.”

“Hold up.” You turn over and he has a calculating look on his face. “Is this why you did most of the mixing before I got here.”

“Noooooo…… of course not.” You say unconvincingly, knowing he already knows the answer.

“You’re so mean to me,” he pouts, sticking out his bottom lip like a child.

“Hey, but now we can still eat the cinnamon roles! So that’s a good thing.” You say brightly, swiping a bit of the icing with your finger and popping it in your mouth. He looks down at you and for once his eyes crinkle with a genuine smile and your heart skips a beat. He’s absolutely stunning, you think.

“Uh, let’s get – let’s get this all cleaned up, alright?” you get out turning yourself around to distract your thoughts from him. And his eyes, when they crinkle, and oh my god he’s such a cutie, what the fuck?

You somehow manage to avoid acting like a fool for the remainder of the time while the two of you clean up, trading words and jokes with one another, the conversation flowing like a lazy stream.

When they were done you squealed out in excitement and grabbed some mitts to take out the pan but as soon as you open the oven door, some feathers zip in to grab it. You look over at him and he gives you an innocent smile.

“Wouldn’t want you to accidentally drop them.” You scowl.

“I’m not the one who made a mess of the whole kitchen, you dork.”

“Fair enough, where do I put these?”

“Just put the tray on the pads in the dining room, I’m going to make some tea.”

“Alright.”

Once the water is heated, you grab a few different packets to see what he wants, and make your way over to the table with him. You gesture at the tea packets, and he takes the Camomile tea and you open the kettle to let him drop it in.

“Now we just have to wait for the tea to steep and the rolls to cool down! Not too bad if I do say so myself.” You tell him happily. It had been really fun watching him do something so carefree, he seemed more relaxed than normal.

“It was really fun Y/N.” he said with what you thought genuine sincerity. “I never got to really do this before, and it was a lot different than I thought it would be baking with someone.”

“I’m glad you enjoyed it Hawks!”

“Uh, you could call me Takami? That’s my family name. Keigo Takami.” He says, stumbling over it a bit, as if the words were trying to rush themselves out of his mouth.

You pour out the tea into the cups you have, and you watch him dive into the rolls, face lit up. He really likes his sweets, and he says how good they are and how he was so amazed he’d had a part in making them.

“Most of the stuff I try to cook either tastes bland, gross, or its burnt.” He mentions offhandedly.

You look at him closely. “Seriously? I’m going to have to teach you how to cook so you can actually get some healthy food into you aren’t I?”

“You don’t have to do that!”

“Yes, I do.” He doesn’t argue with you, knowing that the battle is lost, and accepts it with a sigh.

The two of you finish the night by watching a movie, which leads to something, which leads to something else… It was a pretty awesome date night you think as you drift off to sleep.

           Although doing ‘couple-like’ things in public, you found the two of you were growing closer as friends, at least, outside of any bedrooms. There was something free and liberating about being a friend (with benefits) to Keigo, and you got to glimpse the tiny parts of his life that had physical forms, whether it be photos, or actions or stories.

         The more you learned though, the more you wanted to know more about him, to understand him and be there for him.

         You saw how lonely he actually was, he really wasn’t joking when he’d said that to you on the first night the two of you had seen each other in person. How his life when he wasn’t being the Number Two Hero was empty as if he didn’t really know what to do with it, as if he were lost and didn’t really know himself either.

         The only picture he had of people in his house was one with him, and a middle-aged woman with weary eyes that must’ve been his mother. The photo was a little yellowed, and a little crumpled, but the frame was simple wood with intricate carvings on the side. There was a wooden flower beside it.

         What had happened to him? To his family?

         Sometimes when you called him Keigo as you entered a room and he wasn’t facing you; he would shudder as if someone had a knife pressed to his throat, and there was nothing that he could do about it. Or when sometimes he would dose off and mumble in his sleep for someone to help him, he promises he’d do better next time… You always tried to wake him up gently when that happened, and he’d thank you and then shut down any attempts to talk about it. Every time. Not a single word.

         So, you let it be.

         Obviously, he didn’t know how to not be alone, and it stung you to the very core that nobody else was really there for him.

         Everyone needs a friend, and you were happy to be that friend for him.

           You realized the predicament you were in suddenly one day as you were going into your regular café for your morning coffee, ordering one for yourself and one for the winged hero who you planned to spend some time before patrol with. You didn’t even second guess ordering his coffee just as he liked it, excited to see the smile on his face when you’d give it to him. He’d still get surprised by the little gestures you’d do to show him that you cared, that it wasn’t just a game for you, that you were his friend.

         You hadn’t realized how rare it was to get a genuine smile from him, but you were willing to do so much just to see it. Then it hit you. You wouldn’t go to these lengths for any friend, Keigo was special to you in a way that the other’s in your life weren’t. You think you know what that means, and it terrifies you.

         You knew he didn’t do the whole relationship aspect, he’d said as much, and everything in his life had backed that up as well.

         The barista has to call you a couple times for you to snap you out of your mild panicked thoughts, looking a little annoyed. You quickly apologize, shoving your feelings down and grabbing the coffees hastily as you make your way to the place where he’d be meeting you. You were going to be a couple minutes late, which always made you flustered, and on top of that you were freaking out about trying to keep those emotions you’d buried down there.

         They were not going to see the light of day, you promised yourself that. Maybe you could cram them down so far deep that they’d disappear.

         Ha. As if. You knew it wasn’t going to be that easy, but that was a later problem that you weren’t prepared to deal with right now.

         When you get there, a smile does light up his face as he thanks you, relishing the coffee. The two of you start walking down the street, Hawks waving at people who yell at him, putting on that fake-smile-that-looks-real for people who ask him to join them in a picture, or sign something for them.

         He did it all with patience, but through the cracks you could see the weariness dripping through. The way he put it was that he wanted to do as little work as possible. You assume that’s for this part of the hero business as well.

         “Well, thank you for your support! I’ll be sure to do my best, don’t worry.” He says to a little boy, bending down and flicking his hat, which gets a smile and a giggle from the kid. “Thank you all for your support!” he says loudly as he stands up, and people cheer before easily making their way away from him, the dismissal clear.

         The two of you sip your coffee as you walk down the street. You said you’d go for a quick walk around the city with him before he has to clock in for patrol. While you’re walking, he laces his fingers with yours.

         “You don’t mind, do you?” he mutters under his breath. Your pulse is fluttering but you shake your head no and sip on your coffee. “Good, it’s getting chilly.”

         After you drop him off you can’t help but look at your hand and smile, giggling to yourself a bit as you squeeze your hand. His hand had been so smooth compared to what you thought it would be like, but then again, he didn’t really fight with his fists and he wore gloves. It had felt so good though, the weight of his hand in yours.

           After you noticed how you felt about Keigo though, it became harder and harder to try and ignore the feelings that seemed to bubble up whenever the two of you would talk or text or hang out. Little pangs of excitement would ring out against your will whenever the chime of the ringtone you’d set for him would sound.

         You perk up a little as once again it alerts, going over to read what he sent you.

Keigo: gonna have to be away a little more in the next few weeks -_-

Y/N: aww why :(

Keigo: secret stuff shhhhhh. I gotta go check out some weird villain movement

Y/N: stay safe ok?

Keigo: don’t worry, they won’t catch me im too fast :P

Y/N: srsly if you die ill kill you >:(

           You don’t hear from it at all in the next few weeks, and you didn’t realize how much the two of you had been in contact with, but your days felt strangely empty without the noise that he made so often.

         You missed him, and more than that, you were worried about him so much. Since when did top heroes go on secret assignments? Wasn’t that stuff for the underground heroes to take care of? Why did he sound so calm about it?

         The questions whirled around in your head, day in and day out. The couple of weeks pass in a daze for you, everything seeming out of wack in your life. Part of you was angry at yourself for being so distracted by him, and the other part was busy screaming all the worst-case scenarios that could happen to him. You have nightmares about him injured and bleeding, eyes lifeless. You check your phone at least a few times whenever you can, just seeing if maybe he’s sent a text to you.

         You’ve sent him a few messages here and there, small things like “I hope you’re doing ok!”, or “I miss you”, or “I’m really hoping you’re safe.”

         In the middle of the third week, you hear that chime and you jump up, excited. It’s a short message, but he must be exhausted from his mission, he was away for so long. He asked if you could go over to his apartment sometime soon. Said he needed to talk to you and stuff. His text was short and to the point, he seemed nervous about something.

         Some of the worries had disappeared at the ringing noise came creeping back at that, but you responded that you would whenever you were both free. He said that he’d be off of work for a little while, which was concerning, so you were going over tomorrow. You settled in for a rough night.

           What were you supposed to bring to someone’s house when they had been tossed into secret mission to track down some dangerous villains and were most likely injured? There wasn’t a handguide on that unfortunately, but you did know that he loved one of the soups you had made one time. So, you made some in the morning when you got up, put it in a container and on your way to his apartment for lunch.

         Hopefully that would be acceptable, even though you knew Keigo didn’t really care that much about pomp and other gifts. You think he was grateful to have some company, he loved being on the move and sitting still for a long time would be a special type of hell.

         So, you wanted to do something nice for him.

         In all honesty, you didn’t think it would be that bad when he opened the door with a bruised and cut face, as well as an arm sling with his ribs all bandaged up.

         “Oh my god!” you screamed, your free hands flying up to your face. “What the hell happened to you!” he shushes you and pulls you into the apartment.

         “Not so loud! It’s not public!” he chastises you.

         “Oh, right sorry. I’m just – Keigo, what happened to you? You disappear for almost three full weeks and you come back looking as if someone used you as a punching bag.”

         “Surprisingly enough, that metaphor is rather accurate.” You feel your eyes bugging out of your head and he sees that. “Hey! Don’t worry, this isn’t the worse I’ve been beaten up- Oh god that’s probably not comforting.”

         “No, it isn’t! Is there anything you can tell me?” you plead.

         He shakes his head sadly, pretending to zip up his lips and lock them. “But I can tell you that I’ll be back to normal in about a week or so. I could also tell you about the people I met that weren’t y’know, villains. And you brought soup! You’re the best dove.” You blush a little at the new nickname, but you did notice that the nervousness he’d had when he’d been texting with was definitely still there and it put you off a little bit.

         The two of you ate, the only sounds coming from eating, and the brief comments that Keigo was giving about where he’d been. You nodded in interest, interjecting every once and a while to ask a question for detail.

         After the meal, the two of you sat down together in silence until Keigo cleared his throat.

         “Can I talk to you about something more serious?” You nodded, here came what he’d been stressing about since last night. “God, ok this is harder than I thought for some reason.” He gives a dry chuckle. You stay silent. “Um, I think we’re going to have to take a break from the whole ‘side benefits’ we got going along, you okay with that, dove?” ah. So, this was it. You could feel your heartbeat in your ears. But at least you knew what, now you wanted to hear the why.

         But Keigo was fickle, he didn’t like being backed into a corner. If you would’ve directly asked, you’d get no answer that would satisfy you. So you sit their with your heart falling out of your chest.

         “I mean, if that’s what you want.” You say as neutrally as possible, trying to hide the hurt from your features. It didn’t work as well as you planned based on Keigo’s scowl.

         “You’ve got to talk to me, what about that makes you upset?”

         “It’s nothing, I’ll get over it. I knew this wouldn’t last forever.” You mutter, trying to shrug him off. At least this way you could get over him, maybe.

         “I did say no guarantees at the beginning,” he frowns. It felt like he was rubbing it into your face, and it fucking stung like a cut being washed with rubbing alcohol. “I told you that I’m not good with this whole interpersonal thing.”

         “Yeah, I fucking know that!” each word was like a sting, and your voice echoes in the empty apartment. “Can you at least tell me why.” You hate that your voice cracks on that last sentence.

“There’s this someone I’ve been talking too, when I was out there. A little rough around the edges, but really fucking amazing. I was trying to slip into their friend group you know? Turns out we felt the same way.”

         You feel your heart drop out of your chest and into your stomach. “Wow, Keigo! That’s amazing, I’m so happy for you!” you hear yourself say. The words ring hollow, but he’s so wrapped up in his excitement that for once, he doesn’t notice.

         “I’ve never felt this way about anyone before,” he enthuses, impassioned. “It’s like a totally different wavelength you know.” His feathers were doing this cute little ruffling, and your heart ached. You had to keep your hand back from going to smooth them. Some nights, when the two of you were just hanging out and relaxing, he’d let you smooth them out. He said it felt good, and the texture always made you feel calm.

         You needed some of that calm right now.

         “I’m glad you found someone then.” And you really were, you knew how alone he was. You were happy he found someone he liked. You just wish it had been you.

           You think it was some type of torture, watching Keigo fall in love with someone else. The way he’d talk with his eyes lighting up, the way that he’d do that thing where his feathers would ruffle when he’d think of them with a dopey smile on his face when he thinks you’re too occupied to pay attention to him.

         It fucking killed you when it happens, although you made no effort to break away from him. You couldn’t. You knew that he needed you there, he’d said as much with his small actions, the way he thanked you every time you spent time with him.

         You wondered what you had done to deserve this.

           Eventually, it was too much for you too handle, when he’d started leaving the city more often to go visit them, you started making excuses for why you didn’t have as much time for him in the few weeks.

         “Works really busy this week sorry.”

         “Oh, I’m sick, and I wouldn’t want you to catch it”

         “I’m sorry I’m really tired, I can’t hang out today.

You couldn’t get over him, and you couldn’t tell him either. It seems you could do nothing but ache while he prospered.

It was hard, making distance. You hadn’t realized how close the two of you had gotten, and you hadn’t realized that you had needed him as much as he needed you.

         The phone rings and you see the caller.

         Of course, it’s him. It seems no matter how you try to distance yourself you can’t really get away from him. It always seems like you’re in his wingspan. Always in his reach.

         You pick up the phone, “Hey Keigo! What’s up.”

           You were a fucking fool. Keigo might’ve been the one with the wings, but you’d flown too close to the sun that you’d wanted to see and learn about. The sun that you’d wanted to bask in the warmth in and claim as your own.

         You’d forgotten one of the first things that he’d texted you.

         It hurt so bad.

         You were such an idiot.

           At first when Keigo said he’d been dumped a few months later; you didn’t believe him. Who the fuck would tell Hawks that he wasn’t good enough for them?

         “Ha-ha, very funny joke Keigo.” You say sarcastically. “Don’t stand there out in the rain, idiot.” You gesture for him to come inside.

         He makes his way over the doorstep, eyes unfocused as if he hadn’t even noticed the fact that it was raining. He wordlessly hands you his phone, and you gasp at the text that he’d been sent.

         They said he couldn’t be trusted, that they didn’t want to work to get him to open himself up, that even he wasn’t worth the amount of effort they’d need to use in order to actually get to know him.

         “Still don’t believe me?” His voice cracks on the last word, as he takes a deep breath to compose himself.

         “Fuck, Keigo. I’m so sorry. I didn’t- I’m so sorry.” You bring him in, sit him down and go grab him a towel with some old clothes one of your exes had left in your home when you’d broken up.

         You hand it to him and tell him to shower if he wants to, but at least put some dry clothes on. He listlessly follows your instructions, and you’ve never seen him look so dull. It scared you. While he’s busy though – you vaguely hear your shower in the background get turned on – as you put some tea on. Chamomile, his first choice all those months ago. It was his comfort tea. You also slipped into your room to grab the softest blanket you had.

         You waited about half an hour for him, so you turned on the gas fireplace in the room, warming yourself and staring into the flames as you waited.

         Who would say something so terrible?

         You’d never met his partner, Keigo was secretive at the best of times, but when it came to people, he was especially paranoid. You knew it was because he’d amassed enemies in his years as a pro, but sometimes it was frustrating to deal with.

         However, they must have been truly awful to say something like that.

         You wonder if they would’ve said that stuff if they’d seen the empty apartment, bare of most things that gave a house a character. The lone photo which looked to be at least a decade, maybe closer to two, years old.

         You wonder if they had seen past the mask too, and if that had scared them. Or maybe they hadn’t even noticed it in the first place given the wording of the final text. You knew the pain Keigo was going through, you lived through it every. Single. Day.

         You hated seeing it, but a small selfish part of you celebrated the fact that you had a chance again.

         Pathetic.

         You place your head in your hands, trying to clean your thoughts. You needed to be here for him again, and you were going to be.

         When he walks into the room, he notices you and slumps down into the couch, his eyes red, and his jaw clenched.

         But he wasn’t crying, and it didn’t look like he had either. The rest of his face would be messed up and red if that were the case.

         “You can let it out, Keigo.” You put a hand on his arm and rubbed comforting circles into his back, trying to ease him through it. “You don’t have to keep everything bottled up inside.”

         He laughs bitterly at that, and you’re taken aback. “Yeah, actually, I do. But I appreciate the sentiment.”

         “Alright. Then we can just rest, and have some tea, maybe put on some calming music. Does that sound good to you?”

         He nods, he can’t look up at you though. “Thanks, Y/N.”

         “No problem, Keigo. Be right back.”

         When you do come back, he’s just laying there, staring blankly in front of him. He looks lost and confused.

         “Have you ever felt like this,” he asks in a soft voice. A surge of anger hits you, after all this time he still hasn’t noticed. But you push it down and clear your throat instead.

         “Yeah. I’ve felt like that a lot in my life.”

         “I’m sorry.” He states simply. “It’s awful.”

         “Yeah,” you agree.

         The rest of the night the two of you sit quietly, sipping tea and listening to music. At some point the two of you end up sleeping on one another.

           The weeks pass, and Keigo starts to recover, as that starts to happen, the two of you start to slip back into your previous relationship. You know it’s a mistake, but you don’t stop it. You almost encourage it, because it feels good. It feels like he actually wants you and you can believe it for a few moments before it comes crashing down around you. You know you’re a rebound, even if Keigo himself doesn’t realize that’s what he’s doing.

         So, there he is again, using you as a way to fill his life up to make up for the something he can’t have. Coping with his issues by having someone he could distract himself with, that he trusted and knew cared about his wellbeing.

         You wish you could say you hated it. But then you’d be a liar.

         Because you would take any of the time that he was willing to give to you. You were in deep, and you knew that, just wished you would have a way that you could stop it, rather than just going along for the ride, and hoping that he didn’t completely destroy your heart.

         Although that possibility seemed to be more and more likely these days.

           One day, you realize that you can’t do this anymore.

         One day, you think that you’re not going to allow yourself to do this to yourself or him anymore.

One day you decide that you have to take a full step back. No half done measures this time, the next time he called, you weren’t answering, and you weren’t listening. Maybe taking a complete break from the winged hero would somehow allow you to get over your feelings for him. Maybe the separation would do you some good, you could try and meet some new people, hang out with older friends.

         You have a plan, a way to bring it up to him, to say that you can’t do the whole song and dance with him anymore, you can’t play around because it’s messing with your head. You plan on telling him that you just need some space to rest and recover, and that you’ll be fine in a little while.

         It doesn’t happen that way.

         You’re in his apartment and you’re both eating some takeout, you’ve been on edge the entire night, and of course Keigo notices. He tries to tell you a few happy stories he’s seen that day, tries to give you space to relax. He leans in to kiss you and you panic.

         You jump up and say “I have to leave!” in a really panicked voice.

         “Woah hey, what the fuck’s going on?” He stands up, walking after you.

         “I just, I had a way to tell you- and I’m not ready and fuck I wish I didn’t have to say this but I just can’t do it!” You’re rambling, you know that, but you can’t seem to get your thoughts together, they’re bouncing around your head, refusing to slow down so you can’t catch them, and you’re sitting there panicking.

         “You need to talk to me,” he shouts, breaking you out of your daze.

         “I can’t do this anymore!” you cry out, all the bottled pain spilling up and gushing out. You can’t stop it, and you keep going. “I fell for you in week three, Keigo. WEEK THREE of our arrangement. And guess what! I still fucking love you, you absolute moron! You didn’t notice SHIT, and I didn’t say anything because I knew you didn’t feel the same way, but I knew you needed someone. And sometimes I fucking wish I didn’t, that I spoke up for myself and said something sooner because it’s brought me nothing but heartbreak after heartbreak, and so much insecurity!”

         He looks at you shocked. “Wait… you, but?”

         You laugh, a little hysterically, all the emotions bubbling over. There’s a strange sense of relief. It’s all out in the open now. “Fucking tell the press! I finally found the way to make the Hawks absolutely speechless!”

         “Wait, hold up, you need to slow down. I’m trying to understand what’s going on, and you aren’t exactly making this easier.” His eyes are wide, you’ve never seen him so completely and utterly lost. That was the final straw for you, and you start sobbing, tears streaming down your face as you try to keep your wails of pain inside.

         You put yourself together in silence, his sharp eyes trained on you, you can feel it. Your sobs and sniffles grow less and less frequent as you gain control.

         “I need space Keigo. I need to have space so I can get over you properly, and I couldn’t do it before, I thought I could! I just need to sort everything out, please.” You’re pleading with him, your voice drained and emotionless. “Just, don’t contact me please. Let me” You walk away before he can even answer, leaving him dumbfounded.

         He grabs your arm before you reach the door, a little rougher than he usually is. “You don’t get to say all these things without even giving me a chance to respond!” His usually calm exterior is flustered, a little unhinged with panic and anger.

         “I can! I told you how I feel! Nothing you say will be able to change how I feel right now Keigo! Nothing!” you feel your heart ripping to shreds as you see, for the first time in your one on one time in months, the mask returning as he looks it over too.

         “Got it.” He says short and clipped off. “Thanks for just cutting me off like everyone else did. Get the fuck out of my apartment.”

         You go, quietly, unable to look him in the eye. The door slams behind you, with an ominous thud.

           The first time you gather up the courage to call him again to apologize, he doesn’t pick up. You expected that. You were hoping for that because you weren’t sure if you had the strength to say it to him.

         You tell him you’re sorry. You tell him you know you made mistakes, that you knew you didn’t communicate right and you should’ve trusted him with that. You tell him you miss him because you do. He’d wormed his way into the cracks in your heart that he’d had a part in making.

         You tell him you want to have a place in his life, and that he still has a place in yours, but you’re not ready yet.

         You don’t know if he got it until he calls you back. He leaves a message for you this time as you were in the shower when it rang.

         He tells you he understands now, even though it hurt like hell. He says he’s going to give you space, but would still leave you messages every once in a while. He says that of course you’re going to have a place in his life. He says that you’re the only person in a long time that had even bothered to get to see what was underneath his persona. He says that when you’re ready, to either call him back, or answer one of his calls.

         So that’s how it happens. On some good days and some bad days, Keigo calls you. You listen to every single one, multiple times. Your feelings don’t die down though. You don’t know what else you can do but wait. The sad messages tear at your heart, but you know you can’t be there for him right now properly.

         One of them you can’t help but hear and think that you need to call him, need to reach out to him. He’d sounded desperate in a way you hadn’t heard from him before and it chilled you down to the bone.

         But you don’t. You’re too scared of what you’ll do or say.

         On one of the days where you can’t sleep, you sit and stare at your ceiling, thinking about nothing much. Idle thoughts about the project you were working on, what you had to stock up on the next time you went shopping, the puzzle that you’d gotten stuck on in the current level of your video game.

         That’s when the ringing broke out on your bedside table. That ringtone. You still loved him, and he never called this late. You picked up the phone.

         “It’s two am, I know that, but I need you Y/N…”

         “Hawks? What’s going on. Are you ok?”

         He laughs loudly, “Fuck, no. Can I come over?” He almost manages to hide the waver in his voice.

         You sigh, putting a hand to your temple. “I’m sorry, but you can’t come to me anymore, you know that.” You say it softly.

         “You picked up.”

         “I did.”

         “You still love me.”

         “Goddamn it Keigo, yes! Is that what you really wanted to hear right now at two in the morning?”

         His tone switches to serious. “No. That’s not it at all. Please. It’s important.”

         “I could just hang up.”

         “You won’t.”

         You let out a stream of curses that would make a sailor blush.

         “Fine.” You give in with a groan and the starting of a stress headache. “I’m leaving the door unlocked for 10 minutes. That’s all you have.”

         “That’s way more than I need.” You hear the click of the receiver tone and you move your ass out of bed, going to go unlock the door. There you wait in your pjs, your arms crossed glaring at the door and daring it to open.

         Before the 10 minutes is up, it defies you and clicks open, and in he comes.

         “Hey.” He just looks at you, and he looks exhausted. “Thanks for listening.”

         You resist the urge to just run up to him and take him into your arms. He’d feel so good to cuddle. Instead you say in a wary voice; “What do you want Keigo, it’s late and I’m tired.”

         “I know,” he whispers. “I am too, but.” He swallows hard. “I needed to see you before. Before everything gets fucked up.”

         “What the hell are you talking about? And close the door it’s cold outside.” He follows your instructions without complaint and quietly.

         “You’re going to want to be sitting down for this,” he warns.

         You can see he’s not playing around, so you heed him and sit on the couch, and he sits on the chair, dragging it over so he’s opposite you.

         “First off. An explanation of what I mean.” You gesture at him to carry on. “Remember those villains I had to check up on? Well, they were actually mobilizing an attack on the Hero Commission HQ which is in the city.”

         “No way, seriously?” you can’t believe that they would get that bold so soon. It was insane, and yet, you believed it.

         “Well yeah. I came by to warn you, because there’s going to be so much chaos, and in that chaos, it’s more likely for you to either die or get hurt.” Your hands found their way to your hair, brushing through it nervously. “Hey, hey, listen Y/N” he goes to hold your shoulder’s and looks you in the eye. “The heroes have been preparing for a few months now, taking out some of the villains they can. Everyone’s going to have a much better chance of survival. But staying inside and not opening to door for anyone? That’s going to keep you safest. Understand?” You nod.

         Something niggled at the back of your mind though. “You said first thing.”

         “Yeah…”

         “Well? Are you going to tell me?”

         “You’re going to slap me.”

         “Well that’s not a fucking good sign.”

         He rubs the back of his neck. “Well, I figured out why you’d shocked me so much with what you’d said. When we went our separate ways for a little while.”

         You felt your stomach sink. This couldn’t be good, why did he have to bring that up now. “Yeah?”

         “I didn’t trust my partner with anything that I’d shown you. You were the only person I’ve opened up too since… well a long time let’s put it like that. I haven’t really actually let myself feel things for a while, so I misunderstood them. I thought they were hot; I liked the look and the way they talked. I wasn’t falling love with them. I was in love with you the whole time and I didn’t realize it.” You felt like your heart stopped beating.

         “Keigo?”

         “Yes?”

         “You didn’t think to actually say that in one of your fucking messages?”

         “I didn’t think you were ready to hear it.”

         “I mean maybe not, but it would’ve saved a lot of headache!”

         “I’m sorry.” He says, “I’m learning, but I’m trying my best if you’ll take me?”

         “Of course, I will you stupid bird. It’s going to take work, but I know where I went wrong.”

         “Me too. I believe in us. Heh, us. I like the sound of that.” He has a goofy smile on his face.

         “Oh my god you’re such a dork.” You lean up to press a light kiss on his lips, which he eagerly responds too. “You look exhausted though. Let’s get you into bed, so you can protect the city hero.”

         “Sounds amazing to me.” He follows you into the room, stripping down and snuggling you.

         “I’m likely going to be gone by the time you wake up, y’know?”

         You sigh. “You better not die on me or I’ll kill you.”

         “For you? I’ll stay as safe as possible.”

         “Good.”

           The next day, everything was in chaos, just like Keigo had said it would be. You didn’t even need to leave your house to know that. You saw it on your phone screen as you stayed hidden in your closet, to terrified to move or do anything else. A couple buildings had fallen near you, but luckily your building had stayed safe.

         You don’t remember much else about that day. Fear. Praying that the people you cared about would be safe. Darkness. The sounds of massive explosions and destruction.

         Terrible.

           There were massive body counts of all different people, with varying quirks, lives, beliefs and goals. The damage was catastrophic. You almost couldn’t believe that it had been better than what would’ve happened if there wasn’t early intel and missions.

         You noticed though, that everyone was treated the same in death. Hero, civilian, villain, vigilante, all of them were buried properly, paid for by the Commission themselves. Some of the villains had escaped, there were lots more dead hero students than people wanted to admit, and everyone was more beaten down and broken than before.

         But…

         Nobody had seen or heard anything about Hawks though. It was as if he’d simply vanished into thin air, and the only thing that kept you sane? They hadn’t found his body.

         What about that cremation guy? The traitorous voice in your head spoke out. You told it to fuck off.

         Hawks, Keigo, was not dead. He couldn’t be. You’d finally reached an understanding!

         You refused to allow the possibility in your mind.

           It was a week later when you finally got some news. There was a call from the hospital, and you immediately, you picked up.

         “Is this Y/N Y/LN?”

         “Yes,” you practically shout. “Yes, I am.” You say a bit softer.

         “I’m calling about a Keigo Takami? Do you know this man?”

         “Yes, yes, I do, please is he alive?” you can’t keep the desperation from your voice.

         There’s a pause. “…Yes. He is alive. They’re trying to test to see what the extent of the damage is. You were the only other person other than his mother to be on his emergency contact list, yet you have no relation to him, were you aware of this?”

         “Yes,” the lie comes easily, despite the surprise bubbling up.

         He gives you the address and you promise to be there as soon as you can. You can deal with this, you think, he’s alive and so the two of you can work on it and fix it together like you’d planned.

         Except you couldn’t.

         Little to no brain function, they said. Halfway done the process to become a host body for a new nomu, they said. How were you supposed to fix everything together if Keigo was right there, but also completely gone?

         You collapsed into the chair beside his bed, looking over at him. The man you’d loved for over half a year. The doctors went silent, all of them leaving except for one, who stood silently. You reached out and held his hand in yours. Still softer and smoother than what a pro hero’s hand should be like. Still warm, like the first time you’d held it. You could even feel his pulse.

         It was almost funny; you were finished before the two of you even got started. You couldn’t even say that the two of you had ever truly been together, but that’s what made it hurt more, you think. Nobody would believe you, a random nobody? Dating the number two pro hero? Yeah what an attention whore.

         You sat there, tears building in your eyes, and spilling out

         “Keigo, please just give me one more message?” you whisper, crying harder now. “I’ll be waiting for it, so you better call me when you’re ready, because I’ll be waiting for you.”

[some-random-loki-stan]

Catchin’ The Vibe

Pairing: Loki x reader

Word Count: 2,543

Warnings: drug use (devils lettuce folks), wee bit of angst, fluff if you squint, awkwardness if that counts lol, older GenZ!reader

A/N: Ahhhh! This is my first time posting something I’ve written! I hope you all enjoy!

 Classes that day were less than pleasant. The reminder of 4 major exams coming up did nothing to soothe (Y/s) constant stress and anxiety and she couldn't help but rush out of her final class, ready to finally relax.

          The brisk walk home got her thinking and she quickly pulled out her phone and sent a text to her roommate, Cassie. The girl was well aware of Cassie's habits of bringing friends over unexpectedly. She'd learned to text ahead so that she could change her course of direction before it was too late and Cassie made her begrudgingly agree to stay with them. For as much as their external personalities clashed, she really did love Cassie but she also really didn't feel like trying her own patience today. Instead, she prepped for her backup plan.

When the inevitable response came from her roommate, she sighed and set a course for Avengers Tower. Even if a group of super heroes lived there, the tower was big enough to grant her space from them.

Walking in the front door, she flashed the card that her aunt Pepper gifted her upon her arrival to the big city to the security guard. If you need anything, Pepper had said, pressing the card into the girls palm, just come find me. She absolutely adored her aunt Pepper and although she didn't particularly need anything from her aunt in person, she was ever grateful for the unlimited access to the tower.

The girl was pleased to find that the residence atop the tower was seemingly empty. Out on a mission, she presumed. Thank God.

  She wasted no time plopping herself down on the couch and reached deep into her backpack, searching for the little ziplock bag. The perfect little cookie she had placed in there earlier that morning had crumbled to bits and she made a sound of disappointment. She opened it and poured a handful of crumbs, careful not to spill any on the couch. Only after carefully putting the rest away, she finally let herself fall back against the sofa and unwind.

When the girl found her eyes sore and red, and her mouth dry as the desert, she knew her high had hit. The previous anxious pounding in her heart and head was replaced with a subtle, pleasant throbbing throughout her body. Finally, she felt like she could take a deep breath. Reveling in the feeling, she closed her eyes and thought back on the day. 

Unbeknownst to her, Loki stood in the doorway of the living room, watching her intently. His fingers softly tapped on the hardcover of his book, debating whether or not he should go back to his room. He could sense that there was something different about her today. Something off. Now that Loki thought about it, the girl's energy always seemed a little ‘off’ compared to the other mortals on Midgard, but never this heavy before. It made him shift in discomfort.

Before he could turn and sneak away, her soft yet dry-red eyes peered over the couch and caught his own deep green ones. He was caught.

“Hello,” she said kindly. "You can join me, if you'd like." Loki's presence was one she always welcomed. She smiled softly and gestured to the sofa across from her. Loki hesitated for just a second but then slowly took a seat. She sat up to address him better and continued.  “I wasn't expecting anyone to be here. I thought everyone was out on a mission.” 

Only a couple feet from her now, the god could clearly see the red in her eyes and her exhaustion radiated off of her. His curiosity got the better of him and the question shot out of his mouth, quiet but clear. “Is something wrong?”

The girl froze suddenly. Her thoughts fluttered excuse from excuse. But she stopped, suddenly. She wondered with a bit of mischief -and defiance, probably-, what if she just told the truth. She realized quickly that Loki would probably be the last person to rat her out, quite honestly. Besides, something told her that Loki'd had his fair share of, well, exotic herbal substances, for lack of better term. Forgetting herself, she laughed a little at the thought.

Thinking he'd said something foolish, it took everything in Loki not to stride out of the room then and there. Irritation and perhaps embarrassment bloomed deep in his chest. Instead he let out a little huff which luckily got her attention. 

“Im sorry, but no. Why do you ask?” Her voice lilted up in a teasing manner. She had a small smirk on her face as she took a sip from the water bottle in her bag. 

Loki knew that look all too well. It was the same one he got on his face when he was up to no good. Suddenly intrigued, he narrowed his eyes at her and slipped on his shit-eating grin.

“Your eyes are red. And your presence feels more... tense than usual.”

She leaned forward and swallowed quickly. “What, you mean like my energy?”

Loki paused pensively then nodded.

She snickered and thought about that particularly interesting tid-bit of information. The scientific and spiritual knowledge on Asgard is far different and more advanced than anything on earth, she knew.

Minutes passed and the girl found her thoughts wondering, as well as her eyes. At some point, they landed on Loki reading his book and suddenly a light bulb went off in her head. Surprising herself with this idea, she mulled it over in her head. He is literally the most stressed individual I have ever met...and aunt Pepper has to deal with Tony on a daily basis so that's saying something... there's no harm in asking.

"Loki, have you ever heard of weed?" she asked as innocently as she could muster. He looked at her, contemplating. Eventually, he shook his head no. Delight spread across her face before caution took its place and the girl thought of the best way to explain to Loki what exactly the Midgardian herb was.

 "On Earth, there's this plant called marijuana." A look of slight recognition passed over his face. "It's used as a destresser, antidepressant, muscle relaxer…” She paused pensively. “Some use it for spiritual purposes. It's got loads of uses. Not to mention it gets you nice and toasty." 

With the Avengers away, his normally stiff and stoic facade was softer, allowing the girl to just barely make out the contemplative faces he was making. She had also noticed his brief look of uncertainty at her use of the term 'toasty'.

"So this is Midgards form of the Gift," he concluded.

"If that's what you guys call drugs on Asgard then, yeah. Sure." She let out a little laugh and looked at him intently.

After a second of thinking, he finally looked at her again, mischief seeping into his words and face. "And why might you be telling me this, dearest?" 

Leaning back with a grin, she fished the baggie from her backpack once more. The loose crumbs looked less than impressive to the god but the girl didn't seem to care. She gave Loki a look to rival his own and for a second, it actually made him falter. 

The amount left in the bag was just the amount she felt comfortable giving him so she handed him the plastic baggie. When he didn't take it right away, she pulled back. 

"You don't have to if you don't want to." The gentleness in her voice caught him off guard and reassured him that it was his choice. He had no doubt after that, he wanted to do this. 

For as much as he didn't trust Midgard or their people, Loki was quite comfortable around her. The child of the group and yet she seemed to be the only tolerable one. Her normally quiet disposition drew him in and her ability to launch passionately into one of her stories only made him enjoy her company more. It reminded him of his mother.

Shoving those thoughts aside, he did his best to pour the cookie crumbs into his mouth then set the baggie on the coffee table. Leaning back, they both fell into comfortable silence and waited.

---------------------------

She was in the kitchen when out of the corner of her eye, she saw Loki slowly close his book. The girl looked up and across the space to the connected living room where he sat and saw him staring blankly at a spot in front of him. Finally, he let out a small groan and fell backwards. It had finally hit.

"Loki?" 

His hand twitched in her direction and she knew he wasn't doing well. Quickly filling a glass of water, she was at his side in a second. His head was all the way back, looking at the ceiling and his eyes were wide, pupils blown. His breathing was labored and his hands were shaking. 

"Hey, ok," she said, sitting gently next to him. She placed her hand on his arm but he flinched away. Paying it no mind, she spoke gently. "Don't fight it, Loki. Just relax and breathe." 

Loki tried his best to relax, truly. But there was this relentless twitching all throughout his body and his senses felt dulled by this incessant tingling. His mind was flitting through thoughts faster than he could grasp. Not having control over his mind and body was completely unexpected. The Gift was nothing like this. 

On Asgard, the Gift clears your mind and energy and makes you feel present and centered. It connects mind and body, bringing them together in harmony. This was the opposite. It was incapacitating his body and his thoughts swirled senselessly in his head.

"May I touch you?" 

He looked at her but the words were lost on him, he couldn't focus. He stared at her until she spoke again.

 "Loki? Is it alright if I touch you?" 

Before she could even finish the question a second time, he was already nodding his head yes. The girl smiled and softly placed her hand on his shoulder for reassurance. She rubbed her thumb gently back and forth and held up the glass of water. 

"Take a sip, it'll help," she urged. Loki mustered enough composure to sit up and take a few sips. When he was done, he rested back against the couch, shutting his eyes tightly.

Putting the glass down, the girl sighed as she looked at his rigid body. Poor thing was torturing himself with how tense he was. "Loki, if you don't relax, you're gonna cause more harm than good. Your muscles are going to snap."

He only shook his head.

Suppressing her own increasingly anxious thoughts, she continued. "Then what can I do to help? Please? I want to help you…" But Loki couldn't bring himself to say anything. Instead he shakily took her hand. Gentle but firm, it was the smallest of acts but she could already feel the difference it made. 

After a few moments, his scrunched up face was finally smoothing into one of ease and his breathing began to level out. The twitching was unavoidable and so was the probability of zoning out a couple times but that was all a part of the experience. After regaining control of his breath, Loki finally seemed to be letting himself unwind.

As his body started to melt into the couch, she gently readjusted herself next to him so that she was more comfortable. Not once did they let go of each other's hand. They sat in silence, enjoying the buzz but also each other's quiet presence.

---------------------

As the night got darker and the high mellowed out, Loki found himself actually enjoying his time. He could still feel the tingling in his body but had decided that he liked it. The girl had managed to pull him out of his trance when she pulled her hand away to put on some slow, quiet music that was pleasant to his currently sensitive ears.

"How are you feeling?" She asked, softly.

Still lounging back against the couch, Loki took a moment to think then nodded his head. A lazy smile spread across his face. "I feel...good." 

"Yeah?" she chuckled.

"Yeah."

They both let out a lazy chuckle and the girl fell back against the couch. "So…" She hesitated and wondered if she should say something so soon but continued anyway. "Are you okay? That was kind of... intense and I just want to make sure you're alright."

Loki took a second to gather his thoughts and cleared his throat. "My mind went places I try very hard to keep hidden. I wasn't prepared, is all."

When he didn't say anything more she decided it was best to leave it there. She watched him lose himself in his thoughts again and immediately scooted closer. Grabbing his hand wholly, she pressed herself into his side lightly as not to startle him and gave him a reassuring laugh. "I've gotcha. You're stuck with me now, buddy."

He just closed his eyes and exhaled heavily, the slightest hint of a smile on his face. But then he remembered why he was in this strange situation in the first place. When he had initially walked into the common room, the girl's abnormally heavy presence had made him want to flee. He wondered for a second if it could have been an effect of the Midgardian drug but if he focused hard enough, he could still sense that same tension deep in her muscles.

"And how about you?" 

She looked at him uncertainly. "What about me?"

"Are you ok?"

She shook her head in confusion as she couldn't understand what he was trying to get at. Loki thought about giving it up but he managed to convince himself otherwise. Pay her the same courtesy she did you, he willed himself.

"When I walked in I noticed a particular...mood settling over the room. It wasn't much like you and I wonder if something upset you," he spoke, afraid he might be over stepping.

Recollection spread across her face and she laughed begrudgingly. Now that she had time to relax and let the day sink in -not to mention the external help of her good friend Mary Jane-, she could separate herself from the anxiety and stress of everyday college life. Four exams were nothing, she concluded. She'd gotten through worse before. She could do this.

"Yeah, I'm good. Just some trivial human stuff. But I'm ok, I promise." 

They looked at each other, both their eyes red and droopy. She had a soft, genuine smile on her face and Loki felt himself relax all over again. As the music met their ears once more, they fell into pleasant silence.

----------------------

When the team got home early the next morning, they were surprised to find the two asleep on the couch. With Loki's head hanging back against the couch and the girl's face smothered into his shoulder, it definitely wasn't the most comfortable condition to sleep in. And yet, these two, in their stubborn chaos, managed to make it work. Deciding not to disturb them, the team just let them be and didn't dare mention a word to them when they woke.

[barney-james]

Mission Incomplete || Bucky Barnes x Reader Imagine

AN: i saw a post about tfatws that said that they wouldn’t let villains have their evil monologue so i kinda used this idea. also hi im back!

The loud bang of your partner, and best friend, breaking down the metal door makes you jump, and is likely to alert the attention of many people inside.

“Dude!” you whisper yell at him, slapping his arm. He shrugs his shoulder as he looks over and down at you with a sly smirk. He nods his head towards the door, wordlessly telling you to follow him in. He aims his machine gun in front of him as he makes his way slowly down the hall, ready to fire at any threat to the mission.

You follow closely behind him, trying to peak around his tall, muscular figure in the narrow hall. All you can see is the seemingly continuous walls. When he reaches a T intersection, he stops abruptly, and you run into his back, but it doesn’t faze hime.

“Hey!” you hear a shout from further down the hall. Had Bucky not been walking while aiming a squad automatic, the people in the offices around the two of you may have let you both pass as unfamiliar faces. But Bucky is not one to walk into possible -- yet probable in this case -- danger unarmed. That being said, he’s definitely armed -- his machine gun, two pistols, and a knife. 

From behind Bucky, you still can’t see, but you can hear gunshots from down the hall, and hear Bucky fire back, seeing his body jump slightly with the back fire. He moves forward, towards the building guards, still shooting and taking many down at once. As he passes the sign on the wall that points down the adjacent hall, he taps it to turn your attention to it. The sign says ‘Servers’ with an arrow pointed down the hall.

“Got it,” you tell your partner and pull your pistol out of your hip holster, aiming it in front of you. The commotion behind you had alerted many people in the building, and now a dozen or so people were running towards you, then stopped when they say you and went to draw their own guns. You beat them though, shooting them all down on your way past them. You continued down the hall for a time, passing other halls and many offices. Lucky for you, the offices only had doors into the halls, no windows as some do, so no one inside them would see you striding down the hall with your gun pointed in front of you. More people came out of offices with guns pointed at the increased commotion. You effortlessly took them all down with single shots, continuing your journey to the server room.

When you reached the door that’s sign read ‘Servers’, you waited a moment, checking to make sure there was no one in the hall to see you enter. You thought the door would be locked, but surprisingly, it opened with a light push. You had your gun held in front of you as you cleared the room. No one was in the room, but you noticed an unlabeled door. You contemplated for a moment if you should clear that room before going on with your part of the mission, but you pushed it aside, telling yourself that you’d be quick enough if anyone walked out of it. You closed the door to the hall behind you and jogged over to the big computers. You pulled the necklace out from under your suit and detached the pendant. At first glance, the bulky pendant is credulous enough to pass as just that, but only you, and other agents within SHIELD, know that it’s a flash drive. You quickly insert it into the first USB port you find and begin hacking the computer. It takes several minutes to break through the fire walls, and the whole time you’re anticipating someone to enter the room. You’re on edge, ready to jump on whoever interrupts your mission, but no one comes. You’re uncertain if anything was going on that you didn’t know about, and doubtful that Bucky would not call on you for help if he were in trouble. Though, he’d likely never get into trouble, as he can take care of himself better than anyone on the team.

Once the computer was hacked in, and you located the files, you hit the download button and smirk to yourself in satisfaction. 

“Buck,” you say into com system. “Download has started, should be ten-”

You’re cut off by a gunshot and the breath being knocked out of you. You squeak at the sudden penetrating impact, gasping as you collapse to the floor. You look up at the man in front of you as your vision blurs and your body aches. You bring your hand up to your side, just bellow your rib cage. You feel a deep hole, and it’s wet from the blood rapidly pouring from it.

Meanwhile, down the hall, while your just fighting to stay awake as you stare at the man who shot you, Bucky stops dead, his fist in mid swing. He had a guy on the ground as he beat his face in. He was the last of the men who had come into the hall. He stands up quickly, placing his boot on the man’s chest to hold him down as he turns and looks back down the hall. He could see more people charging his way.

“Y/n?” he asks into the com, his voice breaking, scared you won’t respond.

“Buck-” you barely whisper on the other end, choking up as you try to save your energy. 

Bucky draws his pistol out of his pocket as he’s blinded by a red hot rage, his machine gun being discarded somewhere in the hall from being knocked out of his hands. He turns back to the man under his foot and quickly ends him with a single bullet to the head, then swiftly runs down the hall. He easily shoots everyone in his way, taking them all down with single bullets. He jumps over bodies as he rushes down the hall. Barely paying attention, he has to skid to a stop and back up when he realizes he just walked past the door labeled ‘Servers’. He kicks the door in, not waiting to see if it’s clear. He holds his gun up as he walks into the room, noticing the four men standing in the corner, seemingly theorizing. 

You see him burst in from your spot on the floor, leaning against the desk. “Bucky,” you call weekly. 

Somehow, the commotion of the door being kicked in didn’t get the men’s attention, but you calling for your partner’s name almost inaudibly does.

They turn quickly. Bucky can easily tell the head of the group from the rest, as he’s wearing a long black coat over a suit with a fedora and gloves, also carrying a fancy ass walking stick that reminds you of Lucius Malfoy. The other men wearing button downs and dress pants, just like everyone else he’s shot down. The recruits reach for their guns, but they’re too slow, and Bucky shoots them all down before one could even aim at him. He shifts his aim to the head man, his finger on the trigger ready to shoot. The man adjusts his watch as if checking the time before looking up to Bucky. His gun is in plain view in his belt holster, but he doesn’t reach for it. Bucky steps over you to stand between you and the man as a shield.

Almost hyper-focused, Bucky can hear your shallow breath, and he continues to listen to make sure it doesn’t stop. 

The man before you both rests his hands to his hips after checking his watch. “Sergeant Barnes,” he begins with a thick English accent. He begins to walk towards Bucky, who doesn’t speak, and the man removes the fedora from his head, placing it on the table as he leans his walking stick against it. He evidently does not need the extra support and is just trying to look sophisticated, as he continues to walk across the room towards you and your partner with a normal gate. “It took you 86 seconds to get here. I expected better from a super soldier... Then again,” he continues, “You’re not the super soldier I was expecting... Nonetheless, I have the Avenger’s attention.” The man leans against a nearby desk, looking nonchalantly at his watch once again. “You see, James, the world needs cleansing, and I suppose we should start with the super heroes. You think yourself high enough to ignore the accords, signed by nearly all the world’s nations, and that in itself is corrupt. So I brought it upon myself to study your lot of heroes and derived a plan to lure you here, giving myself the advantage of my own turf. You and your super friends will pay for the global destruction you all have caused. Starting with you two.” The man pears behind Bucky to look at you, pale and weak, and he smiles to himself. “She's already on deaths door,” he points out. “But maybe we could use Mr. Barnes to lure the -” 

Bucky drops his aim, loosely holding the gun in one hand now. “Shut up,” he rolls his eyes and shoots the man in the chest at a consistent rhythm five times. He watches the man fall to the ground, trying to cover his wounds but having too many.

Bucky drops his gun and rushes over to you, feeling your weak pulse. “C’mon, Doll,” he murmurs, stress and fear evident in his voice like you’ve never heard before, but you’re still fading, and can’t register the information. All you hear is ringing, your vision continues to blur and darken.

The man coughs behind Bucky, and Bucky turns to look at him, seeing him coughing through the blood pooling in his mouth. 

“Corruption...must...end,” the man struggles to say.

Bucky garbs your pistol from the floor next to you. “I told you to shut up,” he says through gritted teeth and puts a last bullet in the man’s head. He drops the gun again and bends down to you again, effortlessly picking you up out of your pool of blood. Bucky’s mind is fogged with the fear of losing you, thinking over every little thing he could’ve done differently, not only on the mission, but in your friendship.

“Bucky,” you cough his name one last time before becoming dead weight in his arms, having felt safe enough to black out now that he was holding you.

“No, no, no,” Bucky cries. “No, Y/n, baby, stay with me.” He runs, his mind still clouded with fear and sorrow, not even noticing as he reached the SHIELD vans. The only people sent on the mission were the two of you. He straps you into the passenger seat and leans your seat back. He runs to the drivers door and floors it for the hospital.

~*~

Your eyes flutter open, struggling to adjust to the bright lights and loud beeping that fills the unfamiliar room. You take a few deep breaths as you gradually open your eyes. The crispness of the clean air burns your nose, making your eyes water. You look around the room, coming to a quick conclusion that you’re in the hospital and the beeping is coming from your monitors as you remember what happened last time you were conscious. You look over in the corner and see a long haired brunette staring out the window, spinning red power through her nervous fingers.

“Wanda,” you croak out. 

She gasps in surprise and turns around with her hand clutched over her heart. She sighs with great relief to see you awake. “Oh, thank God,” she exclaims. “Finally!” She runs over to you, looking into  your eyes as she tucks your messy hair out of your face.

“How long?” you ask, pain finally filling your abdomen and making you wince.

“A week,” she begins, then hesitates. 

You give her your ‘spill it’ look, and she sighs.

“Two,” she half smiles. “I’ll be right back.” She gets up from the chair next to your bed, lightly squeezing your hand before walking away.

You hear her foot steps retreat down the hall, a pause, and then several loud crashes as heavy feet run down the hall before your best friend bursts into the room, sliding to a stop once inside the door, barely catching himself on it so he doesn’t fall over. Bucky lets out a soft sob as his hand covers his mouth and he buckles over in relief. 

“Oh, God,” he cries and walks slowly to the chair, as if approaching you would break you again. When he reaches the chair, he collapses into it, crying into his hands.

You try to move for the first time since waking up, your sore muscles making it difficult, but you reach your hand over to him anyway. With his face buried in his hands, he doesn’t notice the motion. “Buck,” you mutter.

He instantly looks up at you, his eyes filled with all the worry in the world as tears creep down his cheeks. You’ve never seen him so upset, and still hazy from your two week sleep, you can’t quite understand why he’s like this. He takes your hand and scoots the chair closer to the bed.

You reach your hand up to hold his cheek, and he takes deep breaths, telling himself this isn’t a dream, that you’re awake. He turns his face into your palm and gives it a kiss, before letting it drop and holding it in both of his. 

“I love you,” he says, his voice breaking through the tears as he looks down at you hand held in his. He takes more deep breaths. You don’t respond, being too shocked and tired to really understand. He looks up at you, the fear having almost completely left his eyes, now filled with hope, and love. “I love you, Y/n,” he continues. “So damn much. And I have, for years, but I never said anything. I-I didn’t want to ruin our friendship, or-or make work awkward. But I just - I can’t not tell you anymore. I thought I lost you, I was sure of it. And the fact that I never told you was weighing me down, and then I started thinking about how I could’ve been there with you, and this wouldn’t have happened,” he starts to ramble whine attentively playing with your fingers with his own, and a smile bursts across your cheeks from seeing him all nervous to say this, and finally hearing the words you’ve always wanted to hear him say, wanted to say to him but didn’t for the same reason, and sure of rejection. A happy tear slips from your eye, unnoticed by you both. “And-and I know you don’t feel the same, and that’s okay. I’ll get over it. I just couldn’t hold it any longer. Not after almost never getting the opportunity again.” He goes silent as he finishes his spiel, and you don’t say anything, still processing everything.

His hands loosen from yours, regret and rejection filling him, but you squeeze his hand tighter, with all your strength. As he stands up to leave, you don’t let go, and you attempt to pull him back to you, but your fatigue wins the battle. 

“Buck,” you call to him. He finally looks at you again, but now you can’t read his expression; there’s too much going on in his head. “Is this real?” you chuckle, and wince, inhaling sharply at the pain, and your free hand grabs your side.

Out of instinct, Bucky steps back closer to you and puts his hand on your leg to make sure your okay. “Wait- what?” he asks confused, having finally registered what you just said.

You smile, sighing happily. “This has to be heaven, right?” you begin. “I’ve been waiting years for this, so I must be dead. This isn’t real.”

Bucky’s mouth drops agape as he stumbles towards you, and you use more strength than you have to pull him over to you. You reach you free hand up and grab his upper arm, but he still doesn’t deem to get the message.

“Kiss me, dummy,” you laugh, this time ignoring the pain. 

He scoffs in disbelief and steps closer again, sitting on the edge of your bed. He gently cradles your face in your hands, and you relish in the familiar contrast of his warm flesh hand and his metal one. Your finger thread into the hair at the nape of his neck as he leans closer to you and captures your lips in a passionate kiss, one long awaited. His happy tears mix with your own in the salty kiss, but you both ignore it as your lips move together perfectly. 

He pulls away, one hand still on your cheek as he looks at you. You lean into his hand involuntarily and smile. “I love you, more,” you say.

“Not possible,” he laughs and leans in to kiss you again.

“Wait!” you say as his lips graze yours. He pulls back quickly, afraid he did something wrong, or that this is in fact a dream. “Did you eject the flash drive?” you ask.

He sighs heavily and pulls away completely, removing his hands from you and rubbing his thighs up and down nervously as he faces the window. He opens his mouth to speak, but is cut off by another voice in the room. 

“Don’t worry, Y/n,” you hear a familiar voice, and look to the door to see Steve standing in the door way. “Save your breath; I’m giving him enough shit for that as it is.”

“Oh my gosh, Buck!” you laugh. “You’re telling me I got shot for nothing?”

His mouth falls open in a sarcastic surprised smile. “So what I just admitted is nothing?” he fakes being hurt.

You grab his hand again and squeeze it. “No,” you giggle, looking up at him. “It’s everything.”

An: I totally didn’t cry writing this, I don’t know what you’re talking about.  Also 200 followers away from a thousand!! Thank you all so much!!!

[worldserasingandcreatinginmymind]

The Intern | Part 10

Series Summary: You move to New York to focus on your art but end up working as an intern at Stark Enterprises

Chapter Summary: your relationship is tested as things take a dramatic turn

Pairing: Tony Stark x Reader, Avengers x reader (platonic)

Word Count: 2420

Warnings: SO much angst oof im sorry 

A/N: this story does not follow the same timeline as the movies. Also, spelling and grammar is not my strongest skill so please be kind :) if you want to be added to the taglist please drop me a message in my ask box

Masterlist | Part Nine

- - - - -

“Remember what I said kid…” Tony warns Peter as the three of you walk through the corridors of the compound. 

“…not a word” Peter repeats Tony’s earlier words “but I don't know why you don't just tell everyone you and Y/N are-” Tony shoots Peter a look and he instantly stops talking, miming zipping his mouth shut. Tony nods as you reach the doors of the meeting room. 

Back at your apartment as you were getting ready to leave Tony had received a text. He didn’t say what the text contained but from his face you could tell it was something serious, and he quickly ushered you and Peter into the car with him. The car journey back to the compound was silent. 

Tony pushes the door open and there you find the Steve, Natasha, Bruce,  Vision and Wanda assembled and waiting. They turn to look at you as you enter, making you instantly self conscious. You catch Natasha’s eye and she gives you a small sympathetic smile.

“What’s happened?” Tony says seriously, coming to a stop at the end of the table. Steve holds up a brown unsealed envelope and slides it across the table to Tony who opens it and removes the contents, placing them on the table in front of both of you. Your heart feels like it stops and your blood runs cold when you see that spread across the table before you are photos of you. 

Pictures of you arriving at the compound, walking around the building, training with Nat. There’s even a picture of you and Tony together on the balcony sharing a kiss. Guess your secret is out. 

Then Tony places a photo of you sat under a tree in the grounds, and you realise…

“This was today. This afternoon, just before we went to my apartment… I thought I heard something in the woods, someone was watching me.” The thought makes you feel sick. Steve must notice how pale you’ve gone as he quickly moves next to you and sits you down in a chair. You lean forward onto the desk, your head in your hands. “he’s never going to stop” you mutter, mostly to yourself. 

“Where did these come from?” Tony asks, you hear the anger in his voice. 

“One of Randall’s men posted them through the door. We caught him before he could get away, he’s detained downstairs now with Sam guarding.” Steve explains calmly. 

“Get Y/N away from here” Tony says before turning and storming out of the room. 

You shoot your head up and just catch a glimpse of him as he disappears out the room. “Tony!” You shout but he’s gone, Natasha running after him. You try to follow but Steve stops you. “Steve-”

“Y/N, he’s right we need to get you out of here” he gently tugs your arm, trying to lead you away. 

“NO!” You pull your arm from his grip and run, ignoring the shouting behind you. You manage to slam the doors shut as Steve bangs on the other side. Before you realise what you're doing your super strength kicks in, bending the door handles so the door can’t be easily opened. You run as fast as you can toward the sound of Tony’s voice. 

“Tell me where he is? What is he planning?” You hear Tony yell from the other end of the corridor, he sounds so angry. 

You reach the room you can hear him in and swing the door open as Tony fist makes impact with the man’s face. You look in horror at the stranger tied to a chair, blood pouring down his face. He makes eye contact with you as Tony’s fist raises up above his head, ready to strike again. 

“TONY STOP!” You shout, jumping forward and grabbing his arm. He spins around, knocking you to the ground. He looks down at you, there is so much anger on his face that you barely recognise him. Natasha rushes over to your side helping you up, as you continue staring at Tony in horror. Tears fill your eyes, threatening to spill as your whole body shakes. 

“Y/N” Tony takes a step towards you and you instinctively step away. A look of shame briefly flashes on his face, before his attention turns to Steve crashing through the doors “I told you to take her-”

“I know, but she is strong” Steve huffs, looking at you.

“I’m not going anywhere” you state firmly 

“Yes you are, its not safe here now” Tony replies just as firm

“Nowhere is safe anymore Tony. The Professor is going to keep coming for me, no matter where I am. I’m not going to run anymore, I’m staying here by your side. Where I feel safe...” you glance at the half conscious stranger in the room then back to Tony “…or at least I used to”

The room falls silent as Tony looks at you with sad eyes. He thinks for a moment before looking to Steve and he nods. Steve comes behind you and wraps his arms around you tightly, restraining you. 

“I’m sorry” he whispers in your ear as he drags you backwards. 

“NO! TONY, PLEASE DON’T!” You shout frantically, making eye contact with him. He turns his back and you dig your heels into the floor but it’s no use “TONY!”

You feel something sharp stab into your arm and you see Bruce standing next to you, needle in hand. You look at him in shock as your eyelids begin to feel heavy. You try to fight but your whole body feels like lead. 

“Bruce? No, why…” 

Steve shushes you, still holding you with one arm as the other hand reaches up to hold your head, his thumb stroking your face gently. When you can’t fight any longer you give in, drifting peacefully into a deep sleep. 

— — — — 

You wake up to the sound of a rumbling engine beneath you and look around to realise you're on board the quinjet. Steve sits up front in the drivers seat while Bruce sits in a seat opposite you, fast asleep. You undo your seat belt and slowly walk to the front of the jet, careful not to lose your balance. Steve spots you from the corner of his eye and glances over his shoulder at you. 

“Ah, you're awake. Take a seat, we’re about to land.” He gestures to the seat next to him and you follow his order, sitting down and fastening the seatbelt around you. Through the window you watch as the jet travels down through the clouds and you see that you're heading to a farm house in the middle of nowhere. There are no other buildings for miles, just empty fields. The quinjet lands with a gentle bump, waking Bruce. 

“are we there yet?” He asks sleepily as Steve gets up from his seat and walks to the back of the jet. 

“yep, rise and shine sleeping beauty” Steve replies, pressing a button on the wall to open the door. He walks down the ramp and exits the jet. You look over to Bruce anxiously as he stands up and looks back at you. 

“Its going to be okay” he gives you a small smile and follows Steve’s path down the ramp. 

You stand there alone for a moment, and for a brief second you contemplate whether you could steal the jet and fly back to the compound. But that idea quickly leaves you when you look at the control panel and realise you don't have a clue how to fly the thing. You sigh and leave the jet. 

You exit the jet, slowly walking down the ramp towards the big farmhouse where you find Steve and Bruce talking to Clint. 

“There she is, hey Y/N!” Clint calls happily to you as you join them outside the front door, flashing him a brief forced smile. 

“Thanks for doing this man” Steve says, patting Clint on the shoulder.

“It’s no problem. She’s one of us now, family takes care of family” he smiles at you and this time the smile you return is more genuine, though still small. You're still pretty drowsy from the tranquilliser Bruce injected you with and honestly all you want to do it lie down. Even better, lie down in Tony’s arms. 

“Cap!” You hear small voices shout and look over to see two young children running out the door towards Steve who high fives them both. 

“Cooper, Lila! Come on now, you’ve got homework to finish” a brown haired woman standing at the door beckons them both to come back in, which they do reluctantly. She walks out to join you all and extends her hand to you. “you must be Y/N, its nice to meet you”

You shake her hand and Clint puts his arm around her shoulder.

“This is my wife, Laura. And those rascals were my kids. Nathaniel is napping upstairs but you’ll meet him later.” Clint explains. Its so weird to see Clint like this. You're used to seeing him with a bow and arrow, masterfully shooting targets. Not the family man who lives on a farm. “could you show Y/N to her room please?” He asks Laura and she smiles at you.

“of course, right this way” she walks inside and you follow her into the house. She leads you up a set of wooden stairs and to the end of the hallway into your new room. It’s a typical farm house room, cosy and homely. Not like the modern compound. You walk in and look around silently as Laura explains to you a few small house rules. You suddenly feel yourself go weak so you sit down on the end of the bed. Laura notices the look on your face and stops talking, watching you. 

“are you okay? Honestly, how are you doing?” She asks cautiously. You stare blankly at the floor, trying to work out the answer. You shake your head, unable to find the words. “well, you don't have to tell me anything if you don't want to. But, if you ever want to talk, I’m here.” 

You nod your head and she leaves, closing the door behind her. You move over to the window seat and sit, looking down at Clint, Steve and Bruce still stood outside talking. You can’t hear what they’re saying but their faces are serious. Laura joins them outside again and they talk for a few more minutes before Steve and Bruce go back onto the Quinjet and leave. As you watch the jet fly off into the clouds your heart starts to race a little, realising you have no way of leaving and no way of seeing Tony again anytime soon. 

A knock at the door interrupts your thoughts. 

“hey” Clint smiles at you “are you settling in okay?”

“yes thank you Clint, you have a lovely house” you say smiling politely, you may be angry at the situation but its not Clint’s fault you're here.

“well make yourself at home, we all want you to feel comfortable here. Laura’s cooking pie for dinner, I’ll come tell you when its ready”

You thank him again and he leaves but then quickly reappears. “oh and I forgot, Steve said Tony wanted you to have this” he hands you a small black duffel bag and leaves again, closing the door. 

You place the bag on your bed and unzip it, opening it to see an Iron Man mask staring back at you. You take the mask out and look down sadly at it in your hands. Why would want you to have this? Just to make you miss him more? Looking at it you start to feel angry, remembering how Tony cast you away. How he got Steve drag you out the room, and Bruce to drug you. You throw the mask down on the cushion of the window seat and storm out the room. You head to the bathroom and run yourself a nice hot bath. As the soapy water warms your skin you feel yourself begin to relax and your eye lids grow heavy. You allow them to close, telling yourself you’re just resting your eyes. You don't realise you’ve drifted off into a sleep until you hear banging on the door. 

“Y/N! Dinner is ready!” Clint’s voice calls through the door. 

“okay, I’ll be down in a minute.” You shout back and quickly get out the bath, drying yourself and getting dressed. You go to tie your wet hair up in a bun but realise you've left your hair tie back in your room. You run down the hall back to your bedroom and open the door, stopping dead still when you see a familiar figure sat on the window seat looking at you. 

“Tony?” You almost whisper, dropping the towel you had been attempting to dry your hair with.

“You had a bath without me?” He says flirtatiously but you just huff back at him. 

“You weren’t here. You sent me away, remember?” The anger shows in your voice, taking Tony a little by surprise. 

“it’s for your own safety Y/N-” 

“Why are you here Tony?” you interrupt him, he stands up from the window seat and you notice he flickers. Like a hologram. Then you realise…

“you're not really here” you sigh, feeling yourself deflate as you look down at the floor. 

Tony watches you sadly, taking a few steps closer to you. 

“Believe me, I wish I was”

You look up at him, disbelief on your face.

“You did this Tony. This was YOUR decision, not mine”

“I needed to know you were safe”

“Until today the safest I’ve ever felt was when I was with you.” You take a breath “But earlier when I saw you in that room with Professor Randall’s man… there was only one person I was afraid of”

“I would never hurt you” 

“Maybe not intentionally”

Your words are like a shot to his chest. You can almost see panic on his face. 

“So, what are you saying?” He asks quietly. You look away, thinking carefully about your words but the truth is you don't know what to say. 

“I have to go. They're waiting for me downstairs.” You grab your hair tie off the bedside table and quickly leave the room. You hear Tony calling your name but you ignore it as you shut the door and rest your forehead against the hard wood. You take a few deep breaths before tying your hair up in a messy bun and going down to join Clint’s family for dinner. 

Part Eleven

Taglist: @sunflowers-and-snowdrops​ @brownbuble​ @shookie-shookie​  @thebuckysoldier​  @chai--chae​ @ilovespideyyy​ @rvgrsbrns​  @dee-vn​

[oh-theatre]

You Can't Force A Fairytale (Chapter 2)

Chapter title: A Short-Lived Separation

A/n:  EEEE IM LOVE LOGICALITY?? Also, my uhh mantra is just HMM WHAT IF THEY WERE ALL FRIENDS?? God, I love them,,, oops. Anyway!! I hope you enjoy! I know how bad this is and probably super like rushed but uh enjoy and make sure to leave me comments!

also if this is confusing i understand, so please tell me and ill try and clear it out!

words: 2133

summary: Roman has buisness to attend to as the gang continue their journey. 

pairings: Eventual logicality, eventual prinxiety, eventual demus, eventual remile (These might change but for now im love them)

warnings: bow and arrow, violence, injuries, magic, swearing, bruises, scars

Ao3 Link  

“Roman, let’s go” His father calls, Roman nods at his fencing partner, stepping away from his place. He thanks him with a nod before following his father out of the arena with a sweat towel, through the bejeweled halls. “Stop dragging your feet” He reprimands, Roman does exactly that.

“Apologies” Roman clears his throat, knowing he shouldn't mumble. Less he receives a punishing yell. “Where are we going?”

“Father, where are we going father” He corrects, Roman nods taking a mental note. “We are going to meet with some neighboring powers, it seems prince Patton has set course again” His father explains, Roman resists the urge to smile at the first news of Patton he had heard in days. “They wish to discuss with us about lending resources in exchange for something of value, I hope you learn something” They turn the corner, photos, perfectly set line the walls.

“Thank you for the opportunity father” Although he does wish he could spend his afternoon fencing and practice alongside his brother, no one had seen Remus for weeks and no one seemed to care.  Except for Patton, who promised he would find him, and now here Roman was about to destroy that. He stuffs his sword into his holster as they arrive in the grand room. Roman will always marvel as the ceilings disappear from view, too high to squint out.

“Sit” His father commands, Roman does, his back sinking comfortably into regal chairs. He fights every instinct to fidget as more people gather, talking in hushed voices to one another, simply nodding towards Roman. A hint of acknowledgment. He listens, however, the voices molded into snippets of conversation until finally, someone talks a little too close to the prince.

“I heard they caught him finally, threw the boy into the back of the carriage they did” Roman perks up, swirling his drink carefully as the snivelly voice continues. “He was with that other prince too, Prince Logan, his father was less than pleased” Logan! Roman fights an eager grin, taking a quick sip. “God only knows what they're going to do to that boy now” Roman's heart sinks below his knees, the sweat upon his forehead growing stronger. “I'm sure the King has his punishment ready”

Bingo

Roman's mind runs wild, only his assumptions in mind. Patton and Logan? Caught? What trials were they going to face now, at the dawn of the world they were on the brink. What was going to be their fight, consequence for trying to do what's right? Was it all Romans fault, no...no, no...it'll be fine. Everything will be fine.

~~~

“This is not fine!” Patton cries, shaking violently in the guards hold. “You can't just lock me away!” He argues, angry tears fall from his cheeks, staining the floor.

“I can do as I please Patton, I'm the King” The deep voice could silence a chamber of councils with his bellows. “Throw him in” He directs, the men do so allowing Patton to scuff his knees, tangling himself in his cloak.

“Please! You cant do this” He shouts, shaking at the bars that lock him into the freezing room. The King snickers before bowing out, the lights dimming as it falls silent. Patton groans, small sparks fly from his hand bouncing off the walls. He catches them playing around with the light. After a brief moment, he sprinkles them around, a calming sense falls over him.

He moves to the window, the glaring sun shining in providing the only hope of escape through the bars. Knowing this tower was made to prevent or weaken magic, Patton wasn't too hopeful. He yearns from the opening, watching the kingdom go on without him, the magic of life swirl about. He looks just across the borders, watching a sliver of another castle behind the clouds, praying maybe a little, that Logan is safe.

Once his dream ends he retreats to the slab they dare call a bed, removing his boots massaging the sores of his adventures. He undoes his cloak, hanging it on a single hook, laying down as his eyes examine the plain ceiling. Maybe something manifest, what does he have to lose?

Yeah, that last about five minutes. Patton, much to antsy, jumps towards the window once more. His fingers tracing every inch of the metal, using what small iota is left of his powers to bend them just slightly. He’s small, he can squeeze through...surely.

~~~

“Surely you've lost your mind, Logan!” His father yells, Logan scratches his ear, clearing out the sound of annoyance.

“Surely I haven't father, now may I be excused?” he requests politely, following his father graciously with his arms behind him.

“No!” His father barks “Because instead of being here doing your duties, you were off gallivanting with that...scoundrel” He seethes, Logan clutches to his wrist taking a deep breath.

“Prince Patton” he corrects, His father turns to him stopping them in their tracks. It was rather amusing the difference between the two. Logan was slim, he maintained himself. He was a lousy man, plump as he waddled grumpily through the castle halls. Logan found it hard not to laugh as he had to look down addressing the man who was supposedly in charge of him.

“You will not speak to me like such” he warns, Logan swallows his thoughts nodding. “Now we have a conference to prepare for, so shoo, go...do something of use” He excuses his son, meeting with his advisors. Logan smirks, bouncing on his heels as he races calmly upstairs. Shutting himself in his room, moving to the fountain that sprays beautifully in the corner.

“I know you're in there” He mutters searching his pockets, finally his fingers surround a circular item. He pulls it out, smiling as a shine comes from the gold coin. “Please work” He begs silently, flicking it into the water, watching as light dances around, his eyes dazed as the color pours out. Soon an image clears, and Logan's blush returns. “Patton!” He whispers, the figure turns, a giant grin as he approaches the screen.

“Lo!” Patton greets in return, his curled locks bouncing along with him. He adjusts his glasses, checking the room. “You used the coin” Patton identifies, sitting at the end of the bed.

“It worked” Logan mumbles in disbelief, his fingers itching for more. He shakes his head, focus, your time is limited. “Are you alright?” He questions

“Little bruised but mostly just bored!” Patton exclaims “They locked me atop ‘Fiona's Tower’” He informs, Logan nods listening, his eyes scan what he can see. “How are you, he didn't...hurt you did he? You got home safe?” Patton inquires, Logan eyes alight with soft affection. Patton watches from his end, wanting nothing more than to be there with him.

“Id barely call this a home” Logan scoffs, Patton bites his lower lip “But yes, the king's men got me home all in one piece” He gestures to himself, Patton smiles weakly. “Pat? Is everything truly alright?”

“Hmm?” Patton hums, he shakes off his doubts, a flashy smile returning “Yes of c-” He pauses, listening “Logan I must go! I'm so sorry, stay safe, promise?”

“Always and forever” Logan recites, his hands cross the water and as it dissolves so does Patton.

~~~

“Everything hurts” Virgil moans, his feet dragging the grass behind him “And I'm tired” He continues, Dolos nods sympathetically.

“‘Everything hurts and I'm tired’ title of your sex tape” Remus blurts, laughing before his eyes grow in confusion. “Whats a sex tape?”

“You don't...nevermind” Virgil groans shaking his head. He realizes quickly his posture over Dolos and straightens himself out, yawning as Emile simply floats ahead of them. Humming delighted as more comes to view. “Hey uhhhh Fairy godfather or whatever?” He calls out, they stop as Emile turns.

“Yes, dear Virgil?” He wonders, ascending as he plants his feathered feet into the newly green grass.

“Where exactly are we going?” Virgil asks, Dolos helping him making sure he stays upright. “Cause like, we've been walking for hours, and Dolos is tired” he nods sadly, Emile cocks his head, his flashy grin remains.

“To the people who I hope can help you…” he looks to the narrator “And Remus” He states first, looking to the figure. Remus stands, kicking the dirt below as he scratches his head. “He needs to return to his brother” Emile informs

“Roman” Remus breathes, a sappy sorrow over him.

“Who?’ Virgil questions

“Virgil's future love!” Remus narrates, quickly his eyes grow as he turns to Virgil “You touch my brother” he shakes his head, Virgil quickly hides behind Dolos

“I didn't do anything” He argues “I don't even know who Roman is!” he shouts, Emile hushes him as he listens to the crackle of leaves.

“You dare speak the prince's name in such a manner!” A voice comes from the shadows, the group closes in each facing a new way. “You will- Prince Remus?” The man stops, gesturing for the rest of his men to stop as well.

“Lucio!” The prince cries, racing forward

“What is going on here?” Lucio forces Remus behind him “Men, take them! They kidnapped the prince!”

Fucking come on! Virgil groans

~~~

“A suitor?! This is ridiculous” Patton scoffs, a furrowed pout upon his face. The King sits across from him, a scowled smirk. “Please! You mustn't do this!” He begs, standing now from his seat. The King does the same but looks to one of his advisors.

“We must prepare for the conference, take Patton to get ready” he commands. The man nods and soon Patton feels himself whisked away, dragged through the halls of the palace he once adored, stuffed into a room.

“Patton!” A woman cries he turns, his face lights up, a sweet grin.

“Val!” Patton breathes a sigh of relief, embracing the red-cloaked woman in a hug. “Oh! I missed you” He smiles pulling away, examining her every feature. “You look good, are you. No harm has come to you right?” He checks

“No! No of course not Pat” Valerie assures nodding “Im perfect as a peach” She grins, he embraces her once more before removing his cloak. He then allows Valerie to work around him, placing the ever so familiar royal garments on him.

“Oh” Patton sighs, spinning delighted in his new suit. His pants comfortable around him, a new slick cloak falls behind him dancing in a celestial blue. He feels royal, he feels himself. “I do miss this” He breathes, smoothing out the bedazzling outfit.

“Oh, I'm glad you like it!” Valerie appreciates, holding a hand over her heart. “You look perfect for the conference” A bell rings throughout “Oh, go show em whos the rightful heir to the throne” She nudges, Patton giggles nodding as he leaves. He braces himself joining them back in the throne room, Patton stands at the King's side grumbling only slightly. As the kingdoms file in, each with a toothy smile to the family Patton ducks out. He makes his way to the stables, finally arriving.

“Nork?” he whispers sweetly, a neigh in response as he bites his lower lip. “There you are” He wastes no time petting his beloved animal, the horse excited to see him. “Oh, I’m so sorry for what happened” He laments, brushing the dark hair. He stops listening as the hay below him rustles, he turns quickly his bow appearing in his hands and arrow ready in a spark of blue light. “Show yourself!”

“Patton” Logan emerges, his hands in surrender. One quick flick and away goes his weapon. He rushes forward wasting no time jumping into his arms. Logan lifts him, spinning his friend around before pulling away keeping their hands interlaced. “Are you alright?” He checks, his hands moving Patton's head.

“Better, now that you're here” Patton admits a quick spread blush. Logan averts his eyes. “Wait...why are you here?”

“The conference? I wasn't sure what it was for but almost every kingdom and the royal family is present '' Logan informs “I fear it means something detrimental for the land” Logan voices his concerns, fiddling with Patton's fingers as he's done since forever. “Is there an evil force at play?” he questions, Patton clicks his tongue cupping his hand on Logans cheek

“Come back to me Lo” he grounds the prince, a quick blink as his friend returns. “Surely if it was dark magic...we would sense it would we not?” Logan shrugs only hoping so. “Come, we should return before our punishments only further”

“Your majesties! You must return at once!” A knight presiding directs, tossing his way into the stables.

“What's the matter?” Logan pushes

“Prince Remus has returned” The knight utters one simple phrase and yet Logan and Patton crash.

[xmarveled]

She’s Mine

Pairing: Steve Rogers x Reader x Thor Odinson

Part 2

Summary: One is a super soldier. The other is a god. They both want you. You can only have one.

Request: Requested by my love @bxcksdoll. Can u do one where Thor and Steve fight over the reader? Omg this was requested like a month ago. I’m so so sorry for not writing it sooner. Writer’s block is kicking my ass. I love you bby and I hope you like this! ☺️💖

Warnings: Violence, an unnecessary amount of swearing

A/N: I just wanted to say, to my Tumblr friends, you guys are honestly the best. Ilysm.💛 If you want to request an Avenger x Reader, feel free to drop an ask, leave a comment below or send me a message! ^^

“Y/N! On your left!” Yelled Sam.

“Shit-” you ducked just as flurry of bullets flew past you. You swerved around, spotting four Hydra agents hiding behind some bushes, trying to reload as fast as they can.

“Oh those little fuckers-” You mutter under your breath.

“Language Y/N!” Yelled Steve, brushing past you on his damned motorcycle. You held up your middle finger and he laughed, blue eyes crinkling as he threw his shield.

With an involuntary smile on your face, you sprint towards the bushes and your world narrowed to the adrenaline in your veins and the deadly weapons in your hands. By the time the agents noticed you, it was too late for them to shoot. You flipped over them and bullets exploded out of your guns, impaling themselves into their skulls.

You hit the ground, rolled, and got up to see two pairs of blue eyes staring at you. Before you knew it, both Steve and Thor were rushing towards you.

“Lady Y/N! Those are some great moves you got there-”

“Damn, that was amazing Y/N-”

Both stopped to glare at one another.

“Shouldn’t you be taking care of the agents Odinson?” Demanded Steve, gesturing at the remaining Hydra agents who were attempting to flee.

“I could say the same for you Captain.” Replied Thor, cocking an eyebrow.

Steve’s jaw clenched. “As your Captain, I’m ordering you to go back and help the rest of the team finish the mission.”

Thor gave him the fakest smile you’ve ever seen. “Right after I’m done talking to this lovely lady over here.”

Nat and Clint snickered as they watch you awkwardly attempt to wedge in between the two males. It was clear to everyone on the field (even the Hydra agents) that both men have taken an interest to you. Well, everyone except you that is.

“I’m asking you to go now Odinson.” Growled Steve.

“With all due respect, you’re not my Captain, Rogers.” Bit back Thor, the smile on his face turning icy.

You got between them just as Steve took a threatening step forwards. “Guys-”

Pain exploded in your arm and you staggered backwards. Both men immediately caught you and the argument was momentarily forgotten as they tried to figure out what was wrong with you.

“Y/N! Are you okay? What happened?”

Eyes closed, you pointed behind you towards where the gunshot came from. Opening your eyes, you watched through blurred vision as rage clouded both their expressions. And then they were gone. You couldn’t see them, but you could hear the sound of pleading in German and than the sound of a neck snapping. You smiled before fading into oblivion. As different as both men are, if there’s one thing that Steve and Thor have in common, it’s their love for you.

You woke up to the sound of beeping. Stupid, incessant beeping that neber stops. Groaning, you attempted to roll over, only to be stopped by a dull ache in your left arm. Your bleary eyes popped open at the sound of a door opening, and a smiling Bruce came into view.

“Ah Y/N! You’re awake!” He said, chuckling as you let out another loud groan.

“What the hell happened to me?” You ask him, trying to sit up before giving up and falling back into the bed.

“A Hydra crook got you in your left arm, up high.” He said. “Don’t worry, you should be fine in a couple of weeks, although you’ll be needing a temporary cast for the first few days. The Hydra agents on the other hand... there wasn’t a lot of him left after Thor and Steve were done with him.”

Bruce eyed you as your face lit up with a soft smile. “What’s going on between you guys anyway?”

Caught off guard, you stuttered out “what do you mean?”

Bruce didn’t even try to hide his smirk as he saw your flustered expression. “You know, those two are crazy about you.”

Now you were actually confused.

“What?”

Bruce’s smirk dropped as he stared at you incredulously. “You didn’t know?”

You shook your head, thinking back to all the times the three of you shared, the way that they were always the first to help you, the concern they showed when you showed the slightest sign that something was wrong.

“Who are you going to choose?” Asked Bruce teasingly.

“I-I don’t know.” You whispered.

“Well, whatever you choose Y/N,” said Bruce, all sighs of teasing disappearing, “Don’t break their hearts.”

Music blasted through the room, making it hard to carry on your conversation with Nat. You were at yet another one of Tony’s parties, the cause for this one being your successful mission. You were sitting at the bar, arm stuck into an uncomfortable cast, dressed to the nines in a red dress that hugged your curves. Even from across the room, you could feel two pairs of eyes staring at you, almost burning holes into your back from their intensity.

As the bartender took your order, Nat looked up in amusement and whispered-yelled to you. “Steve’s heading your way.” You whipped around and Steve was right in front of you. He greeted Nat, before turning shyly to you, all his earlier confidence gone.

“I-uh, was wondering if you wanted to dance?” He asked, cheeks flushing.

You laughed, and he swears that it’s the most beautiful sound he has ever heard. “I’d love to Steve.”

He led you onto the dance floor and right at that moment, a slow song started playing. You glanced towards the DJ booth and spotted Sam wearing a cheeky smile as he waved at you.

You turned back to Steve and took a step forward, wrapping your uninjured hand around his neck. His skin flushed as he wrapped his own hands around your waist, pulling you closer.

Across the room, Thor was watching the both of you with narrowed eyes. He excused himself from his conversation with Quill, who had a knowing grin on his face. He approached you as the song ended, his jaw clenching at the sight of Steve’s hands on your bare shoulders.

The song had just finished, and you were laughing at a bad joke Steve told you when you heard your name.

“Lady Y/N!” Boomed Thor. “May I just say that you look absolutely stunning tonight?”

You laughed, playing alone. “You’re not looking too bad yourself Mr. Odinson.”

Thor was the complete opposite of Steve, confidence radiating off him with every step he took. “If you’re done here, would you like to dance with me?” He asked, turning to Steve, he said “oh, hello Captain, didn’t see you there.”

Glancing towards Steve, you asked if he minded. He bit out a quick “no” before stalking away. Thor pulled you close as an upbeat song began to play, and you can’t help but laugh as he spun you around the dance floor. A bit dizzy after the dance, you excused yourself and headed towards the bathroom.

Walking back to the ballroom, you heard raised voices and the sound of glass shattering. You rushed back into the room, freezing in your tracks as your spotted Steve and Thor facing off in the middle of the room. Steve had a fist clenched in the fabric of Thor’s shirt and both men were glaring at each other.

“You’re just mad that she likes me better Rogers.” Said Thor was a smirk on his face, seemingly unaffected by the super soldier who was almost tearing his shirt.

“Who the fuck said she likes you better?” Growled Steve, tightening his grip on Thor.

“Careful Captain.” Mocked Thor. “I thought you didn’t like that kind of language.”

Steve lost it. He lashed out at Thor, who blocked the blow and punched back, catching Steve in the lip. With a snarl, Steve grabbed Thor’s shoulders, kicking the back of his leg. Thor flipped over and was pinning Steve down when-

“Stop it!”

Both men froze, turning to look at you.

“God, you-you idiots.” You say, voice trembling. “What is wrong with you? Why does everything have to end in violence? Don’t we have enough of that in our lives already?” You turned around and sprinted out the doors, not wanting anyone to see you break down.

You ran outside, stopping only when the compound was out of sight. Finally, you let it all out, sobbing as you cried out. “Why me? Why is it always me? Why can’t I, for once in my damn life, have a little peace?”

You hear a voice behind you say “you’re about to get some peace darling.” And everything turned black.

“Where is she?” Asked Steve, lip still bleeding from where Thor punched him. “I checked her room, the training area, the garden, she isn’t there.” Said Nat. “I lost track of her after she ran out.” Said Thor who walked up to Steve, slamming him against the wall. “This is all your fault, you bastard.” He snarled. “If you hadn’t-“

At that moment, Tony burst into the room, eyes wide with fear.

“She’s gone.”

Again, im so so sorry that this took so long to write. I hope you guys liked it!💜

Taglist: @xxstarwalker @bxcksdoll @phanoffandoms67 @waiting-for-motivation @bluediamondsevie @antisocial-koala @spider-writer @randomavengersquotes @odinson-barnes @bonemarroww @kybaeza @straightouttaneptune @thorfanficwriter @lancsnerd @glitterquadricorn @zselenophile

If you want to be added to the taglist, message me or leave a comment below!! :)

[fliroye]

Complication

Bruhhh can barely write for my life

A present for Leo i guess.

The relationship complexity is driving me nuts

┻━┻ ︵ ヽ(°□°ヽ) FLIP THIS TABLE.

Summary: a saltshaker developed romantic feelings to a new fork in the kitchen, but the fork had something else stealing their heart: a rat. Now, fate-paired, who will they choose?

Pronouns: male

Tags: Tsukishima x reader, sakusatsu, friends to lovers, soulmate au (matching numbers), mentions of angst, fluff, unrequited love

Author's note:

Leo should be the protagonist of an otome game i swear 😔💅

Chomp my ratatouille

rat rat rat rat rat chomp tail rat rat rat rat rat

im going crazy

hahaha oh ho ho ratsumu

*chomp*

━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Alright, let's give this one last shot.

Tsukishima Kei as an ordinary boy, much to his comfort. He didn't stand out, prefering to be the shades smeared on the edge of a canvas. Bathing in the spotlight was something out of his preference; there's no need to be the main character in a story. But right now, he desperately needs it. The hero lead. The male protagonist, in the story of your life.

He was in love with you.

You were the cherry blossom adorning the surface of lakes, the shimmering dew that adorned the fields of sunflowers he pasts on his way to junior high everyday. You were like the strawberry on top of his cheesecake, the shimmering stars to his moon. Whatever you may call it, the boy was endearing to him.

It wasn't like he imagined. He learnt the identity of his significant other years ago, ever since the day you sheepishly asked him for a tour around the school. You was a newbie, and the teacher assigned Kei to your guidance right away. Tsukishima still chuckles at the vision of the 14-year-old version of him scowling at the oblivious student.

It was only until he saw the numbers imprinted on your collarbone when you were changing uniforms that left him in utterly surprise. There the numbers were clear; he wanted to think he remembered them wrong, but no; ho and behold, there it was, 640572, every digit of it.

It wasn't long before Kei felt rocks weighting in his throat whenever the poor boy tries to talk to you. Unnecessary amounts of sweat always pooled aroud him whenever the two strikes up a conversation. Shuttering when he speaks, tripping on himself, this was not like Tsukishima at all. He was used to the calm, stoic aura he wore. Now, years worth of building the cool wall around him crashed down, all because of the stupid smile you flashed at him everytime Tsukki has to help. All because of that melodic laughter he oh so wanted to hear. All because of the little things that burdened the other, giving the blonde an excuse to get closer. All because of you.

Damn, you really killed this one.

Luckily for Kei, the awkward times of your "friendship" soon turned into more relaxed ones, as of there are times even Yamaguchi hanged out with you. Kei was still bring the typical kuudere he is, occasionally slipping snide teasing, just to see the other laugh. Heck, you swore to heaven and back you saw the blonde smile sheepishly at your back for 10 minutes straight, not noticing the later giggles and nagging comments from you about how Kei was "off-balanced" and "like a soft omurice omelette shell broken easily by the touch of a finger". Moments like these left Tsukishima to mentally imprint in his memory, from the littlest of quirks. He treasured these memories with you, with only one goal: make you happy.

He knew he wasn't standing a chance anyways

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He knew, from the day you told him the story of Miya Atsumu, the childhood neighbouring friend you have grown to love. You and Atsumu have known each other from the very start, when your mothers coincidentally met each other again years after their graduation. Evidently, Mrs. Miya decided to bring Atsumu to your house, and your mother welcomed the boy before you could object. You became playdates, and by time, best friends.

You were 11 when you realised the tingling flutters in your stomach whenever you stood by his form, the crimson shades that splattered acrose your face whenever he held your hand. The friendly nickname "'Tsumu" he told you to use could no longer be activated without you immediately turning flustered. You were weak for him.

And yet, he didn't seem to notice.

It wasn't until junior high when you guys parted. Your fun-loving best friend stayed behind while your family decided to move to Miyagi. Life without him wouldn't be easy, you remembered. You remembered the time you fell when you two went exploring the mountains together. You remembered the time you cried of how shitty your days was into Atsumu's chest, letting the other smooth you. You remebered to strong arms that held you close as you too skimmed through the stinging winter air, the warmth that you shared as the two of you hurdled closely together. But now it's all going to end.

As you two waved goodbye, you noticed a series of numbers starting to appear on Atsumu's neck. 'That's strange', you thought, it wasn't there a few weeks before. Atsumu noticed your pondering, and just smiled.

"You'll understand soon enough."

The first few week of your time in Miyagi were... unproductive. You came into class barely before the mid-term exam. Assignments, tests, essays hurled over your head like a hurricane, sweeping you away. You couldn't make friends, as they already have their own little groups. Sure, you talk to them as classmates, but it seemed like their conversations never involved you. At your desperation to cope, the class smartass, cold and sarcastic, miraculously offered a helping hand.

Over the next few weeks, your teachers introduced the term of soulmates.

"Now, each of you here have a six-digit number imprinted on your skin, visible since birth. The number your soulmate has is the exact same to you."

Tsukishima glanced down on his left wrist. There, written neatly, was the number 640572.

"Your soulmate will be the fated person you love."

The person he will spend his life with will have the same number. A few boys snickered from the back of the class.

"However, finding your pair in such a vast sea of numbers is almost impossible. Many do not find their pair."

Kei shuddered.

"Even when we are paired by the universe's will, some fall in love on their own. Meaning they have different numbers."

The blonde glanced to you, who sat diagonally in front of him on his left. You was daydreaming out the window.

"All we can hope is that you'll find happiness soon."

Kei wished he knew what was going inside your head. He never did, though, knew of your memories at the sight of the first 4 numbers, 6405, on Atsumu's neck. He never knew how your cheeks were blazing up at the memory. He never knew, of how you hoped and dreamed to be Atsumu's fated from that day onwards.

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Ha...

Tsukishima raised a hand to his forehead, blocking the blazing sun. He took a quick glance to his companion, you, an energetic highschooler acting like a complete toddler, dumbfounded and amazed at every possible like crumbs on the road. Reminds him of a particular idiotic tangerine, only this one was much cuter and nicer and more thoughtful of his feelings and can make his heart turbocharge in a matter of seconds-

"Tsukki, you're finally going to meet Atsumu-senpai!" You squeak happily, stars adorning your eyes. "He's super awesome!"

"God, please widen your vocabulary range."

God, when will you talk about him in that way.

As you rant on and on, the tingling blush on your soft skin didn't go unnoticed by the blonde. A frown etched on his face.

How long will it take for you to realise, that the one you need is right beside you?

How long will it be before you break his heart completely?

How long will it be before he can hold you in his arms?

How long-

"Atsumu-senpai!"

Kei tch-ed.

Atsumu was wearing the usual Inarizaki uniform, face smug with his signature cocky grin. "Hey, Y/N!" The older waved at the said male, who stood by some particular boy he did not know and was not making any effort to hide his uncomfortableness around him. Atsumu waved it off, and turned to you. "And who's this?" He slumped an arm around the blonde, who's staring at him with so much intensity it could have burned a hole through his head. Before you could answer, the blonde turned around to look at Atsumu straight in the eye, before slipping a small "Tsukishima Kei" and walked off.

"I'll leave you two to your business."

Kei would never admit it, doing something so horrendously reckless. /Why would he care less about some stupid dates you're going with that pisshead?/ And yet, here he is, in all his glory, hiding in a bush spying on your "date". He can't help but feel an awful lot of jealousy as you giggled whilst sharing a sundae with Atsumu at an outdoor cafe. He was supposed to be the one taking Atsumu's place, showering you with "affection" and cracking up occasional jokes. And yet, you seemed to be happy. Enough.

"What are you doing in such a contaminant place like this, blondie?"

Okay, but what the fuck.

The addressed tumbled out his hiding spot, quick to hide his embarrassment. To his surprise, it wasn't the security guard kicking his lonely ass out. Amazingly enough, the adresser stood 6 feet away from him, looking down on the blonde behind their wavy locks.

"The name's Sakusa Kiyoomi. And no, I won't reach out my hand for you to grab on. Stand up on your own and get your germs as far as you can away from me."

Why talk to him in the first place if he doesn't want to interact?

"Tsukishima Kei," the blonde stood up, brushing off little bits of dirt. He swore the masked stranger took 2 steps back. "What's your business with me?" He asked, raising an eyebrow.

"Just waiting for someone," Sakusa turned his back on Kei.

Uh, what do I do now?

As he wandered his thoughts, he noticed Sakusa had taken off his mask. What's strange is the series of number on his face. Starting with the same 4 digit number you told him on Atsumu's neck. 6405. Ending with 36.

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You finally came back, chatting animatedly with Atsumu, strolling hand in hand. The traces of your blush along the way could hand flashed to anyone within a mile's radius. Your companion didn't seem to mind. Instead, he poked fun of you and choked laughing at your reaction of punching him in the stomach. Tsukishima stood awkwardly with Sakusa, who made to remind him of the 6 feet distance neede between them.

Kei was greeted with you rushing to his side, eyes determined.

"How was your day-"

"Kei I'm gonna do it."

What.

Without another word, you left a flabbergasted Tsukishima Kei and rushed to Atsumu. You tapped the senior's shoulder and waited for his reaction, whipping to your friend who stood afar a thumbs up. Wrong choice.

Your eyes met with hazy brown ones. The butterflies in your stomach reached to your throat, and you stood there gawking awkwardly with a blush staring that the older. He brushed it off, thanked you for the time and ruffled your head. He too, was a a little taken back at your staring and rubbed a hand to his neck.

"Well Y/N, today was fun. Thank you-"

"Atsumu, I've been knowing this for a while." You began, cutting him off.

"Know what?" His face fused with confusion.

"Well, I really like you," you couldn't believe the words you spilled out. Atsumu remained motionless.

"And I think I might be-"

You stopped yourself.

This was the first time you saw his full number. His palm on his neck revealed the digits you wanted to know for so long. Yes, the first 4 digits was still there. You didn't remember it wrong. But that last two were not the ones you hoped for. Not 72.

Tattooed on his neck was the number 640536.

"- the best friend you've ever had."

You ended yourself with a fake laugh. Atsumu bursted out holding his sides.

"My god Y/N, your sense of humour never failed me!"

Atsumu saw right through you. You always were a terrible liar.

Atsumu could see the hurt in your eyes. Years of excitement came down to just one moment of expectations, and it completely went the wrong direction. He raised his head, thanked you again, and departed.

You waved goodbye to your childhood crush, and watched as he left with someone you never knew before. "He's found." You sighed, your smile remained, turned around, before bumping right into a certain blonde's chest.

"Kei-"

You stopped yourself, not wanting the threatening tears to spill. Your devastating state was too much for Tsukishima to handle. It broke his heart. He would never make you like this. But he knew he's not the best with words.

But he can't back away like this. Not now.

"Hey, look at me, Y/N, " he called out softly, his soft gaze never leaving yours. "I'm here."

One moment is all it takes to change your life.

Your dams crashed, waterfalls of salty tears rushed out as you clung onto his shirt for balance. You cried and cried for gods know how long, your tiny form flushed against Kei's comforting warmth. He never let you go, staying until the last specks of tears littered your face, whilst occasionally whispering sweet nothings into your ear. All you could do was let him take care of you.

Tsukishima took extra care to make you feel safe. His lanky form wraped you into a close embrace, never suffocating your personal space. Ne stood tall for you to lean on, but the soft sense in his eyes never withered. The sudden turn of the Tsukki you knew was strange, but not in a bad way. He made you feel secure, happy and most of all, loved.

Something that took you years to realise.

Everyday, we learn something new, y'know?

Today was probably the best.

As you blew your last sniffles, he caresses your cheek, you caught glimpse of his left wrist. Your eyes widen with shock.

"Kei, Kei!"

The blonde raised his head in shock, not knowing what has gotten you so worked up about. Your eyes left his to gaze at his number.

Oh.

"...Why didn't you tell me?"

He can't reply to that.

Instead, he pulled you flush into his chest, head on your shoulders. You were confused. Tsukishima Kei has never let anyone on his vulnerable side. Only you.

"Why-"

"I'm in love with you, dumbass!" He shouted abruptly.

Your eyes widen in shock. You didn't know what to do, or even how to react. The usual cool, reserved Tsukki was now a Tsukki who stood in front of you, eyes tearing up with frustration.

"All these years I've known. Everytime you smiled it warmed my heart, every word you spoke was music to my ears. I adore all your tiny quirks and imperfections. You cracked through my walls so ever easily. You had me weak. And yet, here we are."

He was afraid. Afraid to meet your gaze. Afraid of the possible things that you'll say. Afraid of that you won't feel the same way. Afraid of what he was about to say would ruin his relationship with you forever. Afraid of rejection.

You had stopped crying completely. Your splattered tears left without a trace, replaced by something much, much harder for him to comprehend : shock.

"Please," he breathed, "say something."

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imagine lagging while writting this and had to restart haha i cannot

should have drawn something as a cover but things happen and it's not always things you want, yknow?

[a-table-of-fics]

Oddworld: Conar’s Ambition, Chapter 1, Draft 1

           It was another uneventful day in Slog Hut 1884. Little Sloggies were being raised and trained. Food was brought in by the Mudokon Scrubs, and sometimes they would act as surprise treats for well-behaved, or simply fortunate, Slogs. Of course, they also had to clean up after the animals. The Sligs were too busy training them and making sure the Scrubs knew their place. They had a place to fill and a payroll to maintain.

Conar sighed as he punched in. Not that he didn’t enjoy his job; the visor, gun, and mechanical legs were the dream of any Slig. He was also fond of the Slogs. They were vicious, loud, and smelled awful, but there was something endearing about them.

But was it really worth being a nobody in a glorified animal pen? Making next to nothing overseeing both the future guard Slogs and the Mudokon janitors?

Eugh. Maybe he’d feel better if he caught a Scrub doing something wrong. Physical therapy was relaxing, he heard.

He walked out to the pens, passing several ravenous Slogs. They seemed to stare at him intently, but Conar knew they’d be trained and focused killing machines soon, and would be shipped off to Rent-a-Cop stations everywhere.

And Conar would remain assigned here. Maybe he’d be lucky and get a promotion from Slog Hut Corporal to Slog Hut Sergeant, but he’d still be here, just with a shinier pair of Slig Pants and maybe a small raise.

He shook his head. Sligs were supposed to know their place; it was part of the deal. What could he even accomplish if he had his things taken away? Crawling around without Slig Pants to hold him up, totally defenseless against people who would squash him after one look at his hideous unmasked Slig face.

He came up to his coworker, and gave a standard, professional greeting.

“Whaddap, you slime-skinned bastard?”

“Piss off,” came the return greeting. Conar’s colleague turned around, and only a Slig could see a grimace on another’s be-tentacled face, rather than casual boredom.

“Whoa. What’s gotten into ya, Wiren?”

“You ugly AND stupid?” came the tart response. “Boss is comin’ for a visit.”

Conar groaned. He completely forgot, but Wiren was right. Their Glukkon manager Zeb was gonna throw his weight around some today. Their pay was likely to be docked, but maybe it would sting a little less as they all sucked up to him.

“Well,” Conar said, hopefully, as they did last-minute patrol rehearsals, “the Anum Press said that we were sellin’ more Slogs than ever before. That oughta impress ‘im!”

Wiren shook his head. “Stocks been takin’ a hit since the Rupture farms fire. I don’t get it either, but the boss said sales don’t matter.”

Conar thought about this. It didn’t make sense. Gazillions of moolah and the stocks were crap?

They were stationed by the front-facing pens, so there wasn’t much to their patrol routes. They just had to make sure the scrubs were doing their jobs. A few shouts at and smacks upside the heads of the hapless Mudokons seemed like it was enough.

Conar felt his worries melt away as he enforced some discipline on them. It was what he was born for, after all.

“You call that feedin’?!” he demanded, hitting the back of one hapless Mud carrying an enormous bag of Slog chow. “You ain’t eating until all o’ the Slogs have! Now MOVE IT!”

The Mudokon grunted, stumbling a little on his path.

Conar heard Wiren behind him, repeatedly beating on one of the scrubs with the butt of his gun. He sighed. He’d be called a Mud-lover for weeks, but he never understood why his coworkers went to town when a simple jab or smack would do. Not that he cared about anyone under his charge, by any means – no self-respecting Slig employee would. No; it just didn’t make sense. If the Mudokons were here to work, they should be in decent condition so they can get it done.

With that in mind, he shoved Wiren to the side.

“What the hell? I was getting’ ‘im good!”

“Yeah, yeah, save some for the rest of ‘em. Now c’mon, we got a pissed-off Gluk to worry about.”

Wiren grumbled, moving back on path. Conar heard him grumble something about “no fun” and “scrub softie”.

Anyway, there was also the matter of which Slogs to showcase in the front pens. Neither Conar nor Wiren were in charge of those decisions, but it was known that they would need to help get the loudest, most vicious Slogs to the front. Obedience was the real goal, sure, but nothing impressed clients more than a slavering maw on legs ready to tear them a new one, apparently. Maybe they fantasized about those teeth ripping apart those beneath them.

Conar couldn’t reflect on this. Not only did he have the boss coming in, but he had the more pressing issue of one of the escorted Slogs breaking off its chain, and it was making a beeline for him. Without thinking, he turned to flee. He’d seen what happened to those who shot and missed. He’d rather step into the Recycler than suffer that.

The guffaws from his colleagues echoed in his mind as he ran, even though he would likely be doing the same any other day if one of them got into this. The laughs were being drowned out by the furious barks of the Slogs, but it was clear the other Sligs weren’t about to wrangle the animal until he gave this show an ending. He just had to get to the ladder, and he’d be fine. Hopefully, his co-workers could help get the thing back into its pen.

The Slog was fast, but Conar had a head start, and was quickly able to get to the ladder. He started to climb for safety, but a sudden weight and cheers from the other Sligs told him the Slog had clamped itself onto one of his mechanical legs. He looked down and, yup, the thing had its teeth imbedded into his lower leg. His joint whirred as he tried to shake the red thing off, but it held fast.

“It smells the Mudokon on ya!”

Wiren’s crack caused ripples of laughter across the workforce. Even Conar heard a chuckle come out of himself. You had to have a sense of humor at work.

Finally, after much shaking, the Slog slipped off its own saliva, grunting as it landed on the floor. Conar quickly clambered higher before it could focus on jumping at him again. The Slog was still snarling and snapping in his direction, and no one was too eager to move close.

Conar sighed. Seemed he would have to do this himself.

“Open that pen!” he yelled to a Scrub who was on cleanup duty in it. Without question, the Mudokon opened the gate. So there was that, at least, but the Slog wasn’t exactly inclined to go into the pen. Okay, lessee…

Moving carefully around the second floor, Conar guided the Slog into the pen, and shouted for the same Mudokon (he believed the scrub’s name was Mike) to close it. Mike made a mad dash out as the Slog shifted its attention to him, and quickly slammed the gate back shut.

“Right,” Conar said, as the other Sligs groaned. “Show’s over. Let’s try to make the boss happy for once.”

The rest of the time was spent trying to get everything perfected. Of course, there were a variety of stains on the floor the Muds could not scrub out, no matter how many whacks and threats they got from their managers. The tiling was still an ugly green, the Recycler looked as rusty and bloody as ever, and the back room with all the Slog huts was just too poorly-lit.

Still, the facility looked…at least a little more presentable. The Slig patrol routes were memorized down to each step, their guns were full and ready, the Mudokons were compliant, and the Slogs were not only safely contained, but slavering for anyone stepping out of line.

Everything was set up just in time – Zeb’s valet had come, clad in cheap brass armor and wielding a sizable hand cannon, to announce the boss’ arrival. Every other Slig’s posture unconsciously straightened around this higher-ranked one as he said “All right, you slack-jawed Stunkz, listen up! Zeb is here, and he’s already pissed, so make his day!”

Behind the valet/bodyguard, the unmistakable silhouette of a Glukkon stood. Orange eyes looked around, scowling as they searched for problems. Waddling forward, into the light of the Sloghut’s lobby, he revealed his unfeatured, deep blue suit, with a pin at the lower stomach area signifying his recent favor with the Magog Cartel.

Conar remembered the ceremony – very boring if you weren’t a moneymaker.

Zeb’s unusually thin mouth chomped on a small Sickly Smooth cigar – not a super-premium choice, but a far cry from the cheap Lungbuster cigarettes the middle management and security forces used. He waddled through the facility on a pair of shiny black dress shoes, barely acknowledging the saluting and bootlicking from his security, or even the cowering and sniveling from his Mudokon Scrubs.

He walked all the way to the back, and went up to the bulletin board, humming tunelessly as he assessed the personnel numbers.

“Oy!” he finally shouted, turning to the nearest Slig (Gurol from Slog training). “Explain why we have retired employees!”

“Ah, erm, sorry, boss! Some of the younger Sloggies are still teething, but…”

Gurol looked up at the board, reading the numbers.

“…That can’t explain all of ‘em, boss,” he noted. “We only ‘ad one Slig and a coupla workers get attacked back here…”

           “You serious?” Zeb asked, shaking his head. “You lot don’t know how much it costs to replace ya – you can’t even keep track of each other?”

           “Sorry, boss, but I’m in Slog trainin’. Maybe one of the front-facing guys can explain it.”

           The Glukkon turned to his valet and nodded. There was a little bit of spring to the Slig’s step as he marched back to the front of the facility, where the guards were patrolling once more.

           “You there!” he called out, grabbing the attention of the nearest Slig, who happened to be Wiren. “Boss wants answers!”

           Conar was about to follow as well, but he bumped into the valet’s outstretched hand.

           “Yer not desertin’ your post, Scrub-watcher. I just need the one.”

           “Yessir…”

           Conar couldn’t help but to chuckle a little as Wiren tentatively followed the high-ranking Slig. At least he wouldn’t be facing the boss’s wrath. He just hoped his co-worker wouldn’t cost him any of his pay.

           In the meantime, he knew that if anything worsened up here, it’d be on his head. So back to patrolling it was. He had to make sure the Mudokons didn’t relax just yet. Besides, he needed to keep his mind off the risks he might face. He could have his pay cut, get a reassignment to one of the worse Slog Huts, or even be fired and sent to Skillya as a soup ingredient.

           None of that. Focus on the job.

           Step, step, turn, step, step, step, hit Mudokon, step, turn…

            He had to give the Scrubs credit; the floor was less rough and grimy than it should have been.

           Step, step, hit Mudokon, turn, step…

           The Slogs up front seemed calmer, though the one that harassed him earlier still faced him at all times. It was less intimidating, but at least they were all still alert.

           Step, step, turn, step step…

           Okay, what was taking Wiren so long? He couldn’t keep concentrating on stepping and smacking Mudokons upside the head. He was supposed to start on his break ten minutes ago, and he really needed a Lungbuster, but if he left now, no one would be watching this Odd-forsaken floor, and he’d get chewed out for that. He just had to keep focus for a little while longer, that was it.

           Not like anything ever happened…

           The minutes stretched on and on, as did Conar’s need for a smoke. Nothing was happening, as usual, and his mind screamed that his break should happen now, if not sooner. Normally he wouldn’t have an issue just lighting up on his patrol, but it wasn’t technically allowed, for reasons Conar had trouble understanding. Everyone did it when the boss wasn’t around, and he wasn’t around often at all.

           Screw it. He was going to step outside. The Scrubs could take care of themselves for a minute.

               He was almost to the door when he felt a presence behind him. He turned, and winced as he saw those dress shoes tapping impatiently under that suit. Conar could hear that valet snickering behind him.

               “Uh, hi Boss. Just goin’ on break.”

               “Mhm. And I guess you’re leaving the Scrubs on their own, when there’s A KNOWN TERRORIST ON THE LOOSE?!”

               The secondhand smoke as Zeb leaned forward to get into Conar’s face wasn’t enough to satiate his needs, but it did help clear his head for a moment.

               “…But boss, that Abe guy was last seen at Rupture Farms, right? That’s nowhere near here!”

               “FEECO IS ON A COMPLETE LOCKDOWN RIGHT NOW!”

               “What?! When did that happen, boss?”

               “Watch the news for once, you insignificant ! It was just on an hour ago!”

               “Sorry, boss,” Conar said, shaking his head. “I was workin’ then. Couldn’t watch the tube.”

               “Well,” Zeb sneered, “the ‘tube’ says that that blue Mudokon bastard’s gonna try to break into Soulstorm! Is that close enough for you to take your job seriously?!”

               A cheer came from behind Zeb, cut short by a hand going over his mouth. It was one of the Scrubs, and Conar recognized him as the one he called “Slim”. Yeah, he probably had a name, but he was noticeably lankier than other Mudokons, and a little bit taller and thinner for it. Even his cap looked a little taller on his grey head. His yellow eyes quivered as Zeb’s valet spun around in an instant.  

               “Y’see?” Zeb said, over the sounds of punches and grunts. “We gotta keep ‘em in line in these trying times! If someone like that Abe guy shows up, who knows what’ll happen?! Moolah’s already tight as it is!”

               Conar had, just the other day, saw in the Daily Deception how Zeb and his associates at other Slog Hut chains gave themselves sizable bonuses this quarter. He silently thought about this.

               “Now, since your worthless co-worker couldn’t answer me, maybe you can …WHY ARE WE HAVING EMPLOYEES RETIRED!”

               “It ain’t my fault, boss! Idiots keep stepping into the Recycler!”

               He pointed to a giant fan of rusty blades that was on the wall opposite them. It was an effective way of making Slog chow, but all it took was one wrong step for the blades to start, and the suction power of the machine was insane. There wasn’t any way to turn the sensor or the fan off, either.

               “Well maybe if you bums didn’t try to sneak outta work, accidents could be prevented!”

               “It was past time for my break, boss…”

               Conar immediately winced, realizing who he said this to.

               “With your pay, I’d think you’d need the extra work time… LIEUTENANT!”

               The valet stopped beating Slim and was at his boss’ side in an instant, holding a notepad. “Yes, sir!”

               “Take a note! This incompetent Slog Hut is getting half pay.”

               “Already on it, sir!”

               Conar sighed. He could already guess who was going to have to deliver the news.

               “Oh, and there are gonna be some longer hours ‘round here… these upstart Mudokons need some closer watching. All hands on deck, at all times.”

               “Yes, sir,” Conar said, trying his best to keep his voice neutral.

               The lieutenant finished writing down everything, humming to himself the whole time. He pulled out a rubber stamp, signing the note on his boss’ behalf, before handing it to Conar. He read everything over, and his tentacles sagged as he saw Zeb nod at him. He started to walk over to the back, as he heard the boss and crony start to walk out the door. He overheard a little bit of their conversation as they left.

               “Smart way to save Moolah, sir!”

               “Just a few more cost cuts and Ma’s sure to be proud!”

               Slim gave Conar a weary look and slowly got to his feet. He was shaky, but he walked over and extended a hand for the note.

               “Wha…?”

               “C’mon,” Slim sighed, “I know you’re gonna have me tell ‘em anyway.”

               Conar looked at the note in his hand, then back to Slim. The guy already took a wallop, and such news would make him an outlet for Slig rage. Conar would enjoy the view as much as the next guy, but really, they were down enough workers as-is, and delivering news like these pay cuts was a good way to get a Mud thrown into the Recycler. Besides, the guy still had to clean up after the Slogs.

               “You tellin’ me my business?” Conar demanded, slapping the Scrub in the face. “Ya still gotta get the Slog crap!”

               He watched Slim carefully. The Mudokon’s eyes were wide as he rubbed his cheek, and it looked like he was trying not to smile from gratitude. Conar couldn’t stand it; he was a supervisor, dammit, not a caretaker!

               “And pick yer hat up! We got uniforms for a reason, and I don’t wanna see your ugly bald head!”

               That seemed to snap him out of it. Slim nodded and ducked to get his cap back on.

               The other Sligs reacted as well as could be expected. A lot of groans and pointing fingers echoed across the back room. Several Lungbusters came out and the room was quickly full of little red lights. The foul-smelling Slog Hut barely changed its smell. The Scrubs winced instinctively before the Sligs began to resume their duties their way. If the boss wasn’t around, why not? And they had a lot of stress they needed an outlet for…

***

               It wasn’t much longer until quitting time anyway. Conar didn’t mention that they were just being used as a ploy for Margaret favor; what would be the point? He was pretty sure everyone already knew. He simply waited in line to silently clock out. His fellow Sligs were already chatting as if nothing had happened, talking about different kinds of guns, grenades, and liquor. Not that Conar didn’t enjoy those things, but the boss had given him a lot to think about.

               No one noticed as Conar hailed a cab home. He’d normally hit the bar with his colleagues on days like this, but he wasn’t really up to the hell he’d get for delivering the news. He remembered the laughs he had when some other chump had to give the update. No Scrub was available, so the sucker was stuck paying on top of being raked over the coals after work was over.

               Conar was sure he’d still have to do that, but he wasn’t in the mood today. He just wanted to lie in bed for a bit, maybe watch some Name That Trauma, and get himself ready to endure another day. Thankfully, the Mudokon driving the cab knew to drive fast. Yelling at Scrubs was great, but it wore at the throat after a long workday.

               The cab stopped at a part of the city where a lot of Sligs lived. It wasn’t hard to tell, what with it looking like a barely-controlled war zone. Scorch marks, shrapnel, and bullet holes were everywhere. There was the smell of not only gunpowder, but also chemical weapons that were tested here. Even the Mudokon that dropped him off had a rag over his face ready. Conar never got it; every Slig knew the gas weapons were weak stuff. The Mudokons were just chumps, but that was no surprise.

               Conar pulled a keycard from a compartment on his pants’ waist, stepping over a broken mask and a discarded blunderbuss on his way to the apartment gates. He shouldn’t have bothered; he could see that someone smashed the lock again, and a couple of Sligs were working on it. One of them nodded absently while Conar just strolled in through the gate. Obviously, they weren’t security detail. They didn’t have the guns for it.

               No, once again the guy at the front desk had a pistol ready, loudly demanding to see the keycard of anyone coming in. Conar rolled his eyes as he showed his. The clerk grumbled, but let him in. Conar could tell the offending Slig was already taken care of; the clerk grumbled about “only gettin’ to take one shot” as he climbed the stairs.

               It was otherwise uneventful getting to his apartment, but Conar groaned as he opened the door. Ratz had gotten in. The place was more of a mess than normal, and green glowing eyes gave him a shudder. He knew it was a real load, but he couldn’t shake the feeling they were watching him, and taking mental notes for… something. He just wished they took notes of the gunfire that came their way when he came in. It was getting expensive for multiple reasons.

               And there was a reason outside of the bullets – this time he blew a hole into the wall. He could see his neighbor shooting out of bed with a start, turning towards him.

               “What the hell?!

               “Ech, Ratz,” Conar explained, taking another potshot.

               His neighbor rolled over, reaching for something.

               “No, don’t,” Conar said, shaking his head. “They’re already gone.”

               The neighbor sighed, carelessly dropping his gun again, and pulled the sheets over himself again.

               Conar walked over, and dragged his gun locker to cover the hole he made. He did not need this after a pay cut. What he needed was to unwind and turn the tube on. It took time to find the remote and dig through the fridge for some Paramite Pies, but it would be worth it for the season finale of Name That Trauma. It was always fun to see the Mudokons squirm and scream, and this one promised to have the most exciting and elaborate tortures.

               Thankfully, he got the TV on in time. Just at the end of the title card.

               It was a fine season finale, but Conar felt it was less creative and exciting than last season. It just wasn’t as fun when the Mudokons passed out before anyone could even answer.

               Still, it was good for taking his mind off things. He was able to guess along with the contestants, and more correctly than they were. He wished he was there on one of the podiums, because obviously none of the Glukkons, Sligs, or Vykkers they pulled from wherever worked security detail. He’d be able to retire a happy Slig. Hell, he could probably host. He’d put up with wearing that stupid fake toothy grin and gaudy wig if it meant he had moolah to throw around because people guessed things right.

               The Terminal Trauma round arrived. Conar was hopeful; they always saved the craziest and most challenging torments for last, and he hoped this would live up to expectations. Last season involved four different assaults on the Mudokon, one on each limb. How would the ante be upped this time?

               The hapless Mud shivered in the spotlight. His eyes darted nervously, as the crowd waited with bated breath. Two Sligs emerged from either wing of the stage, and the curtain came down…

               And that’s when an emergency bulletin from Magog on the March came on. Conar groaned; he knew that they’d be selling the season finale at an inflated price, and wouldn’t be doing reruns.

               “Special bulletin from the Magog on the March – news you can’t abuse!” the newscaster began. “Mudokon terrorist Abe was seen in Slig Barracks. General Dripik declares martial law!”

               The broadcast cut to a shot of the Glukkon general, surrounded by microphones at a press conference. Any Slig who graduated the Barracks could recognize him.

               “No mamby-pamby Mudokon meat puppet’s gonna make me look like a fool!” he barked. It was a similar inflection to the one he had at Conar’s class graduation speech, which was surreal to say the least. “We’ll have that traitor Abe in no time, or my name ain’t….uh…”

               All the brave resolve and vicious spittle stopped, as his one real eye looked around nervously. His brow furrowed.

               “Er…”

               “Dripik, sir,” Conar said, automatically. He could hear a chorus of the same coming from other apartments.

               Apparently, someone there reminded him too, as he perked up and repeated “DRIPIK! …I knew that, I-I did…”

               Conar sighed as the broadcast’s sponsor came on, M.O.M. ended, and it abruptly cut back to the credits of the game show. There went that highlight of the day.

               Amazing how some random Mudokon could have the big shots shaking in their expensive dress shoes. Abe had to have had that effect; why else would M.O.M. deal with this? Yet, such a powerful figure would be a humiliating way to be ruined? Sure, he was a Mudokon, but he’s the one who caused the Rupture Farms fire!

               “…gonna make me look like a fool!”

               Those words echoed in his head as Conar turned off the TV. He hadn’t put his mask or Slig Pants away yet; he was too distracted with the gears slowly turning in his head. Zeb seemed to be pretty scared of any of his Scrubs following in Abe’s footsteps, even as he and everyone else called them inferior.

               He looked at his pistol. He realized that Zeb might have the Moolah, but Conar might have the power to take it away.

               Of course, he mused, pacing around, he couldn’t do it alone; any Glukkon worth his suit had loyal security of some kind, who would eliminate any threat, no questions asked. He might become a very rich Slig, but he’d also be a short-lived one.

               The scary thing with that Abe guy is no one knew how he did it. How did he cause the Rupture Farms fire with nothing but a loincloth and a feather to his name? Surely if one Mudokon could cause such a ruckus, another could help him raise hell, too…

[teruthecreator]

💘 for macknerva!!

anon, you are a genius. you’ve basically just sent the magical question that has now unlocked for the world: macknerva origin story (bc honestly i realized i just start posting abt it without rlly explaining it??? and someone people are loving it??? so thank yall for being my ultimate favs but u deserve this origin) 

also this is several days late (thank u Depression) and also super long (thank u Dumb Brain) so i hope you can forgive me for both of these things   

💘: who developed a crush on the other first? 

it’s time we take it back....Back To The Start.  

so since this is my magical world of My Own Personal Canon (since i stole griffin mcelroys rights), minerva ends up in Kepler in a completely unnamed and not talked abt manner (bc im too tired to explain my general alternate theory hgkgldlgbfhke but busically she just got on a ship to earth to avoid dying) and is staying with duck until further notice. she doesn’t mind laying low at duck’s apartment until they’re able to figure out Everything and get her set up w a place of her own (spoiler alert: that never happens, but duck won’t admit he just misses having a roommate so they let it slide). 

after about a month (which feels like eons in minerva’s mind), she starts to get antsy. she’s already been introduced to the pine guard and amnesty lodge, by this point, so she’s constantly trying to hang out with someone so she isn’t stuck in duck’s apartment all hours of the day. 

which is how minerva ends up in the cryptonomica the day kirby has to run into his job at the theatre for a good portion of the day. it’s pretty empty in the shop--i mean museum, so it’s not like ned minds (plus him and mack have already struck up an agreement, which i explained in a previous post abt ned and macks friendship) especially when minerva’s around to willingly pick up the slack. 

but this second job has minerva curious: 

minerva: I assumed your assistant, Kirby, had only the singular position at your museum?  ned, from behind the counter: Oh, for a while he did, but then the theatre opened up and his services were needed elsewhere. And who am I, Ned “Theatrical” Chicane, to deny such a marvelous establishment of the skills and technical prowess Kirby possesses?”  minerva: Oh? A theatre, you say? 

here comes some random personal hc: on her homeworld, minerva was involved in her planet’s form of theatre (which i’ve always pictured to be very greek-esque, thus explaining her naturally booming voice) and absolutely adored it as a hobby. she, obviously, understands there will be a difference between Earthen theatre and the theatre she once performed; but there is no denying that that thought barely crossed her mind as she proceeded to pester ned about the theatre until he suggested she get a part-time job there. 

(ned knows mack’s struggles with keeping hires at the theatre, which is why he is quick to suggest minerva get a job there. that, and ned knows enough abt mack at this point to pretty accurately guess her Type. so let’s just say ned was doing this for both macks gain, but also for his gain to be able to harass her abt her hot new employee that he totally inflicted on her on purpose) 

ned probably brings it up later that night, or the next day. just really casually drops that he has someone interested in a position at the theatre:

mack: Holy fuck--yes, Ned! Tell them they’re hired!!! What can they do?   ned: Hmmmmm, well she’s quite fit, and has no qualms with getting her hands dirty.  mack: Oh, perfect! I need some more set builders! Thanks a whole lot, Ned. I knew you’d always have my back.  ned, knowing full well what he’s just wrought: Oh, of course, dear Mackerel. Anything for a friend! 

cue the next day: mack is just going about the theatre, business as usual, staying sort of close to the house doors so she can be Right There when ned comes in with the new hire. she’s faced away from the doors, checking something on her phone (probably her texts with ned, to see if he’s arrived yet) when she hears the doors open and shut. mack turns around to witness the Hottest Woman She Has Ever Seen In Her Goddamn Life. 

she’s tall--holy shit is she tall--with beautiful dark skin painted with these almost glowing blue tattoos that travel all the way across powerful arms and a prominent collarbone. but the tattoos don’t stop there, of course they don’t. they go all the way up to this woman’s bald head, perfectly framing her beautiful face. high cheekbones, strong chin, a wonderful nose (mack doesn’t have much of a preference for noses but this one is perfect she just knows it), masterfully-carved eyebrows that look like they were chiseled out of stone, and those enchanting, bright, beautiful bright blue eyes.  

mack’s brain basically short-circuits once minerva smiles at her (with those pearly white teeth and a grin so inviting it feels like her whole heart is melting), so she’s barely able to process the smug ned beside minerva. 

@goforduck drew this scene for me a while back and imma show it to u all bc i love him, his art, and the hot takes he gives my special lil ship: 

needless to say, mack Is Attracted, but i wouldn’t necessarily consider it a crush. meanwhile, minerva’s pov, she’s so damn excited for this job that she’s practically vibrating on the way in. and then, like romantic poetic would have it, all of that energy halts as time stands still and minerva locks eyes with....mack.  

mack definitely looks a little disheveled, but it’s like every fly-away hair crowns her head like a halo as those gemstones-for-eyes lock w minerva. she’s never seen someone she has felt so immediately attracted to in her life. but, that being said, she still does not Have A Crush. 

so after all the awkward blustering (AKA mack tripping over every eighth word as minerva turns on the Charm to keep that blush on mack’s freckled face) mack starts to get minerva accustomed to the work environment and the tasks she’d need to do. eventually, she hands minnie off to kirby bc shes got work to do, and the rest of the day goes by uneventfully. 

now minerva works at the theatre, and she’s Delighted w it. the job is easy but entertaining, she’s making friends, her knowledge of the world is expanding, and she now has a target for some very playful flirting and obvious showing-off of her muscles. because, listen....she has Eyes. she Knows mack always blusters whenever she’s around. and she knows herself, too. mack is cute and minerva likes making her blush. but there hasn’t been that moment where things are taken seriously.  

until about a month in, when minerva walks into something she maybe shouldn’t have but also definitely should have. 

you see, mack has a very important ritual in the morning. she arrives at the theatre at the absolute ass crack of dawn so she can get her yoga/stretching/vocal warmups in (since she is still a performer at heart and this has been her routine since college) and then sit by herself on the stage just sorta soaking it all in before kirby comes in with her coffee (which she needs in order to get up from her seated position on the stage bc she is that much of a coffee addict). just about every employee on staff knows not to even bother coming in this early bc 1. this ritual is very Private and Sacred to mack and 2. ur not even gonna be able to speak to her unless ur kirby w her coffee. 

“just about” encompasses every employee except for minerva, who decides to show up before kirby to bring mack her coffee (that she memorized after cornering kirby for the specifics one day) 

so she comes in the back entrance and is sort of at a loss as to where mack may be bc she doesn’t know mack’s routine. and she’s just kinda wandering aimlessly through all the shops and little rooms until she reaches the wings, where she hears the gentle strumming of a guitar. 

she approaches, with all the caution of a woman who has spent years mastering the art of stealth along w her combat studies, and comes upon the following scene: 

mack is seated in the exact center of the stage, eyes shut peacefully as her body sways to the tempo of the song she’s strumming on the guitar she’s playing (which minerva recognizes as the guitar that some idiot pit member left here about two weeks ago). she’s singing (the song is Dream A Little Dream of Me), and her voice is so soft yet so resonate that minerva feels as if she could stand right next to her or be 1000 feet away and hear the exact same thing. and she sounds so good, so completely in the song she’s performing and in her contentedness that it eases some subconscious unease minerva was holding. in the time minerva’s known mack, it’s the most natural she’s ever heard or seen her, just playing for an invisible audience in the dim lights of a theatre not yet awakened. 

minerva doesn’t realize she’s drifting closer to mack until she steps on an uneven plank, and the noise snaps mack out of her little world as she turns to the noise. needless to say, she’s a little surprised that minerva’s here this early, but then minerva wordlessly hands her her coffee and so mack could care less. she accepts the drink w a smile and then decides to go to her office to get started on some business emails. 

it isn’t until mack has already left the stage, and minerva is still stuck in the same position she was when she handed mack her coffee--heart racing a million miles a minute, face hot, and stomach feeling as if an entire colony of butterflies suddenly took refuge there--that minerva realizes that she is Endlessly, Hopelessly Fucked In Love. 

So yeah, TLDR; Minerva was first. 

[6-v-6]

1-100. Just give it to me all

ALNLSNGLSG ARE YOU SERIOUS OMFG im so sorry this is going to be Long

1. Spotify, SoundCloud, or Pandora? I’ll say Pandora just because it’s the only one I’ve actually ever used. If I used Spotify I’d probably like it the most but I don’t use those apps so

2. is your room messy or clean?VERY VERY MESSY I need to clean it but im lazy

3. what color are your eyes?Brown!

4. do you like your name? why?My birth name? No. And that’s why I changed it ahahahaha yes I like the name Jae since i chose it myself. It’s short and simple

5. what is your relationship status?Single 

6. describe your personality in 3 words or lessContradictory ....... Situational 

7. what color hair do you have?Currently it’s blue c: Natural color is a lightish brown

8. what kind of car do you drive? color?I don’t have a car nor a license :/ I want a motorbike tho ! a black one

9. where do you shop?I shop pretty much exclusively online. Buyma or Amazon, typically

10. how would you describe your style?I’ve been told that I dress like a “bad boy”. I like leather and black and ripped skinny jeans but I do like casual stuff too. Like hoodies and sweats

11. favorite social media accountIf this is talking about my own social media accounts, then this one right here on tumblr. I’m not very active anywhere else

12. what size bed do you have?uuuuhhhh I don’t know proper terminology but it is small

13. any siblings?Yup! I have an older sister and a younger brother

14. if you can live anywhere in the world where would it be? why?Japan probably? It’s super pretty and I’ve always wanted to visit

15. favorite snapchat filter?hmm I don’t use snapchat that much but probably the flower crown one it’s cute

16. favorite makeup brand(s)I don’t wear makeup tbh so i dunnooooo 

17. how many times a week do you shower?7 I don’t ever skip showering 

18. favorite tv show?Psych? I also like the 100 currently

19. shoe size?asglnasg... god .... im a 6 in mens nd like a 7 in womens i have small feet

20. how tall are you?ALNSLGNSG im trusting no one has read this far so it’s okay to disclose this info...exposin myself.. im 5′2″ ............

21. sandals or sneakers?Sneakers !! I don’t wear sandals like ever

22. do you go to the gym?Yes! Only recently, actually! I just bought a gym membership with my friend and we’ve been going 3 times a week c:

23. describe your dream dateoh geez I havent really thought about this? I’m not very romantic or anything (im on the ace spectrum) but... i dunno. I think it’d be nice to just have fun together. An amusement park maybe? And just a lot of hand holding and smiles

24. how much money do you have in your wallet at the moment?Upwards of 100 bcuz my mom keeps giving me money even tho i dont use it

25. what color socks are you wearing?HAH im not wearing any 

26. how many pillows do you sleep with?1-2 it depends on the night

27. do you have a job? what do you do?I work at the cafeteria in my school. I run the register and help to stock items and also serve food to people

28. how many friends do you have?wow this is a Tragic question. Online I have quite a few! In person i literally have....... 2. Barely that lol. More like one

29. whats the worst thing you have ever done?Killed my sister’s fish (on accident)

30. whats your favorite candle scent?I’ve never thought about this or really smelled many candles to begin with :( something mild though. Maybe a mild vanilla??

31. 3 favorite boy namesuuhghg 1) Cain 2) Luka 3) Eden

32. 3 favorite girl names1) Erin 2) Rayna 3) Kira

33. favorite actor?I rly dont give a crap about actors if I’m being honest lmao. Uhh choi minho :)

34. favorite actress?Lupita Nyong’o?? she’s gorgeous

35. who is your celebrity crush?I don’t have a crush on him but does Lee Taemin count

36. favorite movie?Princess Mononoke

37. do you read a lot? whats your favorite book?I read ff more than books these days. I don’t have a fav book

38. money or brains?is this what I prefer? Money binch if I had money I wouldn’t need brains also I’m dumb anyways 

39. do you have a nickname? what is it?No I do not

40. how many times have you been to the hospital?Twice? Maybe 3 times

41. top 10 favorite songscheck out shinee’s entire discography 

42. do you take any medications daily?Nope

43. what is your skin type? (oily, dry, etc)i ?? have no idea?? I guess oily? My skin doesn’t get dry so

44. what is your biggest fear?Probably flying. I hate planes

45. how many kids do you want?Exactly none

46. whats your go to hair style?? uh side-swept? I have no idea what to call it just what my hair normally looks like I guess

47. what type of house do you live in? (big, small, etc)A moderately sized house

48. who is your role model?Not to be cheesy but Lee Taemin also Kim Kibum also Choi Minho also Kim Jonghyun also Lee Jinki

49. what was the last compliment you received?that I’m great? lol

50. what was the last text you sent?’okay’ to my mom lmao

51. how old were you when you found out santa wasn’t real?ARE YOU TELLING ME SANTA ISNT REAL??? okay but for real who remembers the age they find out omg .. i was Young so idk maybe like 13

52. what is your dream car?ohhh boy a lambo for sure

53. opinion on smoking?Gross. Smells terrible

54. do you go to college?I do indeed. I’m gonna be a senior ya’ll

55. what is your dream job?To be a writer I guess. I don’t really have a dream job

56. would you rather live in rural areas or the suburbs?Suburbs? I dunno. I like living in the city I’d probably die of boredom in some rural area

57. do you take shampoo and conditioner bottles from hotels?hell yea binch

58. do you have freckles?nope!

59. do you smile for pictures?Not for selfies but for other pictures yes I feel like it’s weird or rude not to

60. how many pictures do you have on your phone?like 300 something

61. have you ever peed in the woods?what the fuck?? lol?? no??

62. do you still watch cartoons?does voltron count :/

63. do you prefer chicken nuggets from Wendy’s or McDonalds?neither if I’m being honest but Wendy’s I guess. I never ever eat at mcdonalds

64. Favorite dipping sauce?barbeque sauce?

65. what do you wear to bed?An oversized shirt and boxers lol

66. have you ever won a spelling bee?no i cant say I have

67. what are your hobbies?Writing, sometimes. Playing video games. Bein unhealthy

68. can you draw?Naaaah

69. do you play an instrument?No :( I wish I did but I never learned any

70. what was the last concert you saw?SHINEE WORLD V IN LA!!!!!!!!! BEST DAY OF MY LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!

71. tea or coffee?Coffee bcuz i h8 tea

72. Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts?Well the coffee at dunkin donuts is worlds better so dunkin donuts

73. do you want to get married?no

74. what is your crush’s first and last initial?i dont have a crush

75. are you going to change your last name when you get married?’when’ lol i dont plan to get married

76. what color looks best on you?black, in my opinion

77. do you miss anyone right now?no not really

78. do you sleep with your door open or closed?open because if it’s closed my cat will scratch on it incessantly until she’s let in

79. do you believe in ghosts?hell yeah dude

80. what is your biggest pet peeve?when people like, dance around a subject. I prefer it when people are straightforward. Especially if they want something from me

81. last person you called`Honest to god I can’t remember. I don’t ever call people lmao so probably my mom

82. favorite ice cream flavor?I like Rocky Road a lot!

83. regular oreos or golden oreos?regular. Golden oreos are a lesser creation

84. chocolate or rainbow sprinkles?RAINBOW. GIMME DAT GAY SHIT

85. what shirt are you wearing?It’s just a plain white t-shirt

86. what is your phone background?ot5

87. are you outgoing or shy?Horribly, annoyingly shy although I can mask it pretty well

88. do you like it when people play with your hair?yes :D

89. do you like your neighbors?lmao I don’t know them?? They arent noisy though so yes I like them since they aren’t annoying or anything

90. do you wash your face? at night? in the morning?Both. I take a shower in the morning and wash it then. And then do a skincare routine at night

91. have you ever been high?no.... not that I know of. One time I took nyquil though and it Fucked Me Up i felt high but idk if I was or if that’s even possible

92. have you ever been drunk?nope. I’m not a huge fan of the idea of getting drunk. I don’t like letting my guard down like that so if I ever do it’ll be when I’m alone

93. last thing you ate?a mento 

94. favorite lyrics right nowthe entire lyrics to So Far Away by yoongi

95. summer or winter?WINTER. I hate summer fashion i like being able to wear my jackets and jeans and not Die of heat stroke

96. day or night?night I guess just bcuz I can be alone

97. dark, milk, or white chocolate?dark chocolate is superior in every way

98. favorite month?uhm.. December? Because its the end of the year and I’m on break then and Christmas and cold weather and hot chocolate

99. what is your zodiac signI’m a virgo 

100. who was the last person you cried in front of?uhhhHHHH I really make it a Goal to never cry in front of people since im just super uncomfortable with that and honestly dont feel comfortable enough around anyone to do that. My sister walked in on me when I was crying once though so her I guess

[warmau]

your neighbor aus are so cute!! can you do jun, jeonghan, and hansol please??

aww thank you!! sure, ill also add in dino to complete the neighbor!17 series ~

joshua, mingyu & seungkwan can be found (here) ~wonwoo, hoshi & seungcheol can be found (here) ~ seokmin, woozi & minghao can be found (here) !~ 

Jun

you’re pretty sure you saw him in a movie once, but you’re not a hundred percent sure. everyone in the building is sure they’ve seen him on tv,,,,but was it a movie? a commercial? a show? no one ever truly finds out,,,,,

sometimes every1 is like “he looks too rich to be living here”

but tbh jun loves the attention like he won’t admit it outloud but please,,,,,,,he probably poses in the elevator ever so subtly and everyone is like oh my look at how handsome and in jun’s head he’s like ‘mhm this is my angle take it all in, i look great from a 45 degree tilt to the left’

jun is doing the most basically 

model walks in his plaid pajama bottoms and flip flops, bends and snaps when he throws out the garbage. you will nEVER catch him off guard

his apartment is pretty cool though because jun is the type to splurge. so like big TV,,,expensive blankets,,,,,,,probably one of those glass coffee tables that are super fancy and jun doesn’t even know he has expensive tastes it’s just like second nature to him 

oh and he has mirrors

like a lot of them

when will any of us reach this level of Self Confidence t b h

and you’re like pretty familiar with jun because photography is your hobby and he’s always asking you if you guys bump into each other if you can ever help him take some headshots since he wants to try out for modeling

like you always agree but halfheartedly because you’re not sure if you want to work with someone,,,,,,,,,,as high maintenance as he seems

but one day you get caught by jun coming back from the park where you took some photos and he’s like are you free now??? and you’re like mIGht as well get it over with,,,,,,,,,

so you tell him yes and that he should come over since you have some lighting equipment @ your place

and jun,,,,you notice as you’re setting up is a little fidgety. like he keeps looking at his reflection in his phone and biting back his lip and you’re like ???? i thought he was like super confident about his looks but he seems,,,,nervous 

and you’re like “are you ok?” and jun snaps out of it and desperately seems to try and hide his feelings with a sly looking grin and he’s like “of course~!”

and you ask him to sit and face forward and,,,,,he does but then he like tilts his head a bit and you’re like “i need you to look straight if you want me to get a good shot” and he’s like oh! sorry

and he does it but you can see his eyes flashing worry and you’re like “,,,,hey are you really ok?”

and jun laughs, again obviously hiding what he’s really feeling and he’s like “fine! i just don’t think i look too great if you see all of my face like this”

and you damn near drop your camera because what the HELL is he talking about and you even say it, like literally, you’re like what the hell are you talking about

and jun scratches the back of his neck and tries to wave it off but he’s like “i look the worst from the front, my angle and profile is way be-”

and you’re like picking your camera back up and you’re like “you look like a handsome actor up front, don’t even say something like that.” and jun looks at the lense and you snap a couple of photos then go over to show him 

and you’re like “look at your jaw, and your skin??? it’s a gorgeous color, softly tan,,,,and your eyes are so strong and distinctive?? your nose is like the perfect size! you don’t even need touch ups - you’re naturally stunning.”

and you don’t notice it but jun is looking up at you and his smile turns into a bit of a smirk and he’s like “you think im stunning?” 

and you’re like yes!! and his smirk gets bigger and he’s like “i think you’re pretty stunning too-”

and you’re like me???? what- but then you catch the smirk from the corner of your eye and you like playfully push his shoulder and tell him not tease

but jun shrugs and he’s like “what, it’s true. you’re very nice to look at too.”

and you brush it off, hiding your face behind your camera as you get ready to take more photos of him

but you know,,,,,,turns out he isn’t all that high maintenance,,,,,,,tbh he listens really well to you and you get a lot of shots

and as you’re both looking at them you feel jun’s hand sneak around your shoulder,,,,his body closer to yours but like,,,,,,,you don’t mind,,,,,,,i mean,,,,,,,,,,,,,who would mind lbr

jun insists that he should pay you back for taking his photo and you’re like it’s fine and then he’s like ‘ok, then let me just take you out on a date because i really really want to.’ and you’re like DONT joke about that but jun’s like im not joking????? let’s go on a date??? gorgeous people need to stick together you know~~~~

Jeonghan

the neighbors call him ‘the perfect son-in-law’

because they want all their daughters to get married to him because he seems like the perfect man: good looks, good manners, good brains like WOW the whole damn package

and jeonghan is always so humble and modest about the nickname he’s like “marriage? oh im not ready” or “im nothing compared to your daughter”

(but in reality he’s just like lol please leave me alone i want to go home and take a nap. he’s just,,,,not saying that because that would be rude LOL)

he’s always really soft looking. like he never leaves the house with bed head, owns many warm looking sweaters, always reading some classic literature and seemingly listening to au clair de la lune 

just a real live fairy human,,,,angel,,,,,,,glowing force of beauty?

and his apartment is the same. like fight me on this but jeonghan would have some dried flowers hanging on his walls, paintings by like monet, a fuzzy white carpet, and like vintage looking furniture you’d feel like you were in a story book

and he like even set up a little corner of his apartment with a drawing easel,,,,,,,,like im talking instagram level aesthetic here

collects like ,,,, idk,,,,,,, little glass statues or something like bare with me it’s just so pretty because he’s so pretty

and you know him (how could you not) because every time you two leave at the same time he smiles kindly at you and you’re just like wow. this day? blessed

but one day you’re coming home and you’re in the wORST mood because of work/school plus you got soaked in the rain since your bus came late and you get into the elevator with jeonghan who smiles at you but you can’t even bring yourself to feel the usual happiness you do when he does that

and the elevator ride is slow up but then suddenly you feel something warm on your wet shirt

and it’s jeonghan putting his cardigan around your shoulders and he’s like “you can catch a cold walking around like that.”

and like holy shit an angel just touched you but also you’re like ,,,,, i,,,,,,i can’t take this from you

but jeonghan is like don’t worry, also make some tea when you get inside.

and you both split ways when the elevator door opens and you’re inside your apartment looking down at the cardigan in your hands and you’re like ?!?!?!?!?! what,,,,just,,,,,,happened

and the next morning you plan to return it but before you do you close the door and see a note stuck to the front and it reads ‘keep the cardigan. i hope you don’t get sick.’ and you’re like ,,,,,,,,,,, am i dreaming

but you hear another door unlock and you look over to see jeonghan again and you have no clue what to say because the most beautiful person on earth is being so sweet to you

and he smiles again when he meets your gaze and he’s like “glad you’re not sick” and you’re like “um,,,,thank,,,thank you for worrying about me?” and jeonghan shrugs and he’s like 

“ive always worried about you, you come home looking tired and i hope you’re not overdoing it.” and you can’t help but want to like d i e because,,,,w h a t,,,, he’s been worrying about you???? what kind of romance movie plot,,,,,

but then jeonghan leans a little closer and he’s like “if you feel sick, knock on my door. i have some medicine and ginger my mother sent over.” and you’re like ,,,,o,,,,,okay,,,,,,,

and jeonghan touches your cheek softly and heads for the stairs 

and you’re like am i imagining things or is,,,, ‘the perfect son in-law’ interested in me,,,,,,,

but no you’re not imagining things because jeonghan stops midway down the stairs and is like leaning against the wall because he’s happy you’re not sick but gOD he really just invited you over,,,,,,to his house,,,,the neighbor he’s liked for so long,,,,,,,,,,,,

Vernon

tries to act cool and independent but always has to call over someone to kill any bugs he finds in his house

he’s got really bad luck because while he tries to look aloof and grown up he ends up tripping over things or walking into walls or getting himself stuck between the elevator doors and ,,,,,,,,, everyone in the building is like “he’s such a cute kid!” and vernon is like im NOT a kid,,,,,,,,,,,

but c’mon he once screamed because he thought the shadow of the neighborhood cat was a ghost

but this unconscious dorkiness is what makes him so lovable and everyone’s always asking him to say something in english and vernon is like “good morning” and everyone’s like WOW SKILL TALENT

the type to ride a scooter everywhere,,,,,,,,seungcheol passes by on his bike and is like ??? and vernon is like “scooters are the new Aesthetic”

has one of those cool beds that’s like a bunkbed but the top is the bed and the bottom is a desk area 

and he’s bought a lot of composing equipment and he has a collection of headphones and other cool things that pertain to music all around his apartment

and it isn’t that messy, but it’s all in dark tones like his little sister visits and always insists that vernon change his bed sheets from grey to like yellow and vernon is like ‘im a cool guy, cool guys don’t have yellow sheets’ and his sister is like uh huh ok

you actually don’t know vernon that well, but you know his sister because you work part-time at a grocery around the block from your building and when she visits vernon she always stops by to get food and complain a bit about how brother n EVER eats actual meals

and you think she’s the most adorable girl on this side of the planet so you always sneak in free ice-cream or candy for her 

and as you’re getting home from your shift one day, the elevator opens and there’s vernon and his sister and once she sees you she’s like !!!!!!! and drags vernon over to you and she’s like 

“i didn’t know you lived here too!!! this is the brother im always talking about, are you guys friends???” and you and vernon are both embarrassingly like not really,,,

and his sister pouts and she’s like “when im not around, can you take care of him for me? im worried he’s not getting enough sun and -”

and vernon coughs because sOFIA you’re embarrassing,,,,,me,,,,,

but you’re like “ok, i will!! good neighbors take care of each other ^^”

and vernon kind of tries hard to keep from turning pink when you ask if that’s ok with him and he’s like ,,,,,, sure anything to calm down my sister

and it’s funny because sofia is looking between you and vernon and she’s like 

“you’d look cute together you know, my brother is single-”

and vernon is like OOOO KA ay,,,,,,time to go nice talking to you neighbor bye bye

and you watch as he like dashes off and he’s like c’mon sofia but she stays back a bit and leans over like 

“i think he’s shy,,,,,he’s like that. but it’s a good sign, i think he’s interested too~~”

and you’re like oh my,,,,,,,

but also can you believe sofia. the real matchmaker mvp 

Dino 

get mistaken for someone who doesn’t live alone, but who still lives with their parents because what???? you can afford to pay rent on your own?????

but tbh he’s quite independent, and a quick learner like ask any of the other seventeen neighbors who self taught themselves to make chicken tenders from scratch??? no one. except dino who learned from the nice grandma down the hall

sometimes gets in trouble for playing music too loud but he’s too cute for any1 to stay mad at for 2 long

can be spotted playing tag with the younger kids if their parents have to go get groceries or something, he gets a side job as a babysitter sometimes because kids love him???? he’s so good with them because he has so much energy??

his own apartment is a lot like him, it’s colorful and the most important thing is his speakers that are the only thing he keeps relatively clean. his desk is littered with clothes and notebooks and candy wrappers from late night snacks

has photos of his parents performances up on his wall and in his closet he has it separated into : dance costumes and normal clothes 

all his refrigerator magnets are in the shape of dinos,,,how cute

he practices dancing by himself late into the night so a lot of the time he ends up getting hungry and ordering pizza on a whim and,,,,,one day he gets a pizza but it’s like???? an extra large size because the orders got screwed up and dino is like: i cannot. finish this

and he considers calling vacuum cleaner hyung (minghao + mingyu) but it’s late so instead he’s like “maybe the neighbor will want some!!!”

that neighbor is you,,,,,he’s also up doing some late night work and when you hear the doorbell you’re like ?????? it’s 1 in the morning,,,,,is it a robber??? and you grab a nearby pot just in case but when you open the door slowly

you just see dino,,,,,with his kindhearted smile and a plate stacked with??? pizza slices

and he’s like “i don’t know if you like pizza, but i have a lot left over and i thought if you were awake you’d like some !!!” and he grins and puts out the plate and you’re like ???? but also,,,,,,,,pizza for FREE,,,,,,,yum yum

and you gladly accept and dino is like happy because he’s made you happy and for a second you two stand there a bit awkwardly and you’re like “do you want to come in?” and dino is like “well,,,,it’s late but we never properly introduced ourselves as neighbors so??”

and you’re like it’s fine come in sorry for the mess and you go over to your kitchen, dino following behind and you’re like “so why are you up at this ungodly hour?” and dino is like “im practicing!! i dance~” and you’re like OOOO show me 

and dino clears your sofa a bit and starts busting out all these cool moves and you’re eating pizza and clapping and you’re like encore!!! as a silly joke but he really does start doing another routine

and you’re like holy hell i never knew i lived next door to such a talented person!! 

and dino blushes red and he’s like “im still practicing, it’s just a hobby for now,,,,” but you’re like “seriously, you could be a PRO, you should try becoming an idol?”

and dino is like wHA,,,, i could NEVER and you’re like “you’d do great!! you’re a nice person, you dance well, and you’re cute!” and the word cute just makes dino scrunch up his nose,,,,,but he likes it and he’s like 

“maybe ill look around for some auditions!!” and you set down the pizza to give him a thumbs up and you’re like “once you become an idol, ill be your number one fan - i promise~” and dino is like alsfgkfsdkh don’t say that that’s so cheesy

but you’re like “you know what’s really cheesy? this FREE PIZZA”

dino: “good pun!!!!!!!!!!!”

you: “i know right!!!!!!”

you’re both laughing so damn hard you accidentally wake the other neighbors LOL