#in the same way one hates vriska probably

[bipbopdepmop]

AAAAAAAAA

I just finished red valley and aaaaaaaaaaa

I KNOOOWW

have some really lame doodles to cope askfdsjrkkdf

[thewertsearch]

GA: I Woke Up A Long Time Ago GA: I Had Trouble Sleeping When I Was Young [...] GA: And When I Was Supposed To Be In My Cocoon I Would Often Wander Out To The Desert GA: Where One Day I Was Visited By A Stranger Who Dressed And Spoke In White

Oh, for the love of peace. Is there anyone that this globe-headed chucklefuck doesn’t have in his pocket?

GA: He Put Me To Sleep And I Awoke On Prospit […] GA: He Said He Was My Guardian GA: And Though He Visited Rarely I Did Regard Him As That GA: Then Later He Stopped Coming

This one might not be so bad, actually. Scratch seems curiously uninterested in Kanaya, and she bears none of the telltale signs of his manipulation.

Maybe these visits were actually just part of his day job. As Alternia's First Guardian, Scratch might be obligated to protect the Frog Temple and its associated Player, just as Bec did on earth.

GA: In Time I Began To Believe He Was A Figment Of My Mind […] GA: But Then While Playing Our Game I Learned He Was Real […] GA: And Had Been Manipulating Us All To Advance His Schemes

Bad news like Scratch gets around - but not as much as I'd like it to. Kanaya views Scratch as a menace localized to Alternia, and seems unaware that he's involved in Rose's fall, too.

GA: It Was Saddening To Learn My Fortuitous Awakening Had Been The Product Of A Nefarious Ploy GA: Youre Lucky That Your Awakening Probably Had No Such Entanglements

No, Jade's awakening was part of Vriska’s nefarious ploy. She might be a bit of a loose cannon, but I'd take her over Scratch any day.

GA: I Feel A Bit Silly That It Took Me So Long To Engage With The One Corresponding Closely With My Role GA: It Must Be A Certain Madness Im Afflicted By GA: To Orbit Those More Reckless And Dangerous Than I And More Daring For It GA: I Guess I Want To Help Them But They Never Can Be Helped It Seems

GG: are you saying rose is reckless and dangerous? GA: Yes Definitely GA: We Have Our Share Of Dangerous Players Who Seem To Do Nothing But Cause Problems GA: I Believe She Is Yours

I think it’s a little unfair to tar Rose with the same brush as Vriska - or even Terezi, for that matter. It's not like Rose has actually killed anyone, and she's generally a lot more sensible than-

...alright, touché.

GA: And If Her Insane Plan Wasnt Alarming Enough GA: She Has Been Communicating With The Stranger I Mentioned GA: And Unsurprisingly She Has Not Been Forthright About The Nature Of Their Conversations

Wait, so she does know that Rose has been talking to Scratch?

That means that Rose is almost certainly aware of the mayhem Scratch caused on Alternia. It was probably the first thing Kanaya told her, when trying to warn her - and yet, Rose is completely unfazed. When questioned, Scratch undoubtedly provided the perfect excuse.

I’m coming to realize that we probably can’t outmaneuver Scratch -at least, not while we're playing by his rules. If we really want to pull ourselves out of the web he's woven, we should focus on exploiting his 'dark spots'. Both the Scourge Sisters are aware of them, but I don't know if they've told anyone else.

GA: And Hes Not Merely A Guardian GA: Im Very Sure He Is A First Guardian GA: Like Your Lusus Was […] GG: im not sure why, but the sound of that makes me really nervous GA: I Feel The Same Way About It

I hate to tell you this, guys, but First-Guardianing is just how he pays the bills.

It's his side hustle you need to worry about.

[davekat-sucks]

what is astonishing to me about the entire yiffy "plot" is how it went out of its way to destroy one of the only few things people liked about the epilogues? rose and kanaya were happily married with a daughter? nope, rose has a disgusting dog penis fetish and a secret dog fetish child and she was actually neglecting the daughter people cared about this entire time for the writers weird zoophilia fetish!

If it's WhatPumpkin's way to villainize Jade or to make RoseJade happen, this is the absolute worst way to do it. It didn't help that the old WhatPumpkin team were not huge fans of Rosemary. They like Rose and Kanaya as lesbians, but not them being together together even after the base webcomic has ended. I'm still more upset that they didn't go for a half human half troll fankid for Rosemary's child. They just had to ADOPT one that just HAPPEN to look like Vriska. Because Kanaya adopting someone that looks like your ex-crush is totally healthy. They have ectobiology too, so they CAN make it happen. If they couldn't, I would have been fine with just a quick and small explanation how human and troll DNA could never be compatible even with all the high tech that trolls had made. Though that probably would not stop me joking about how Earth C hates hybrid freaks lol Carapacian x Human romance is forbidden! You can only marry the same species!

[sexygaywizard]

So as the person who created the Miku/Vriska poll and thus saw everyone's tags and comments about it I thought I would do a little write-up about it bc I thought that that it was pretty interesting.

A lot of people have accused me of rigging the poll (no idea how I would do this) or having biased followers-- however I did blaze the post specifically so that it would get outside my own circle of followers and thus be more fair.

For the first two or so hours of the poll, there was about a 60/30 Miku/Vriska split which was a lot heavier than I expected. After the blaze got approved (on the 3rd hour) the gap started to close, and the 4th and 5th hour were probably the closest it ever got, with the results at one point being 54/46, an 8 point lead for Miku. However, as the post started get more and more popular, around the time of it hitting 5k notes, Miku went back farther into the lead as the post spread around people farther and farther away from my own circle.

The poll ended at having around 6k notes (I was asleep so I'm not sure exactly, but I'm judging based on what it was when I fell asleep and when I woke up). The poll received 29,882 votes with 59% (~17,630 votes) for Miku and 41%(~12,251) for Vriska. For reference, the official poll run by @lutzlig for Vriska/Bayonetta that was happening at the same time received 33,249 votes and had around 5k notes at time of finishing. The Miku/Bayonetta poll where Miku lost 46% to 54% received 46,172 votes and had somewhere under 4k notes at time of finishing.

From what I saw in the tags and comments, the motivations for voting for either character were generally: • The character was more nostalgic to them (they had known of the character longer than the other one) • They felt the character had more personal influence on their life • They liked/identified with the character more • They liked/identified more strongly with the character's fandom

The reasons people voted for Vriska specifically were: • They felt her popularity/iconic-ness was more specific to Tumblr • They felt Homestuck/Vriska had a greater cultural impact on Tumblr • They felt Miku was a more recent occurrence in Tumblr culture • They felt that her level of controversy was more accurate to Tumblr's reputation and identity • They felt Miku didn't have a personality • They incorrectly identified the poll as a "sexywoman" poll and did not think Miku was sexy

The reasons people voted for Miku specifically were: • They felt she was overall more "iconic" and well-known worldwide • They recalled more specific memes about her (Miku at the grocery store, Thomas Jefferson Miku Binder, "Miku made Minecraft," etc) • Miku has an older internet presence • They did not know who Vriska was • They disliked Vriska as a character • They disliked Homestuck as a whole • They felt as if she had been wronged in the Bayonetta poll (sometimes specifically by Vriska fans sabotage)

Overall I felt the thing that had the strongest amount of impact on Miku winning the poll was simply that Miku was popular, well-liked, and well-known. I saw many tags of "I don't know who this grey bitch is" or "idk who that is but it's clearly homestuck and I hate homestuck" or even "I had heard of Vriska but this is the first time I've seen what she looks like-- so she clearly can't be that iconic." Whereas I got literally two comments out of the thousands of tags and comments that didn't know who Miku was. By virtue of Miku being basically whoever and whatever you want her to be, she's entirely uncontroversial. And well, any of us who've been here long enough know about vriskourse.

Personally I felt that they were both deserving in their own ways-- Miku was the tumblr woman we needed but Vriska is probably the tumblr woman we deserve.

[cure-typhoon]

Part 2 of this post where someone asked me to talk more about the beta trolls friendships and now you are all stuck with me on this multiple-post adventure :3 how long ago anyway?? well heres a link to it

Also something i forgot to mention, I'm using this archive by tumblr user @ eridan-ampora, if some of the dialogue screenshots have a white background, is because its from the documents and not the Homestuck site (as theyre from a flash and more complicated to find in the site lol)

Anyway back to where we left, Eridan and Kanaya!

Their friendship is very much, how do i say it, antagonistic? Its similar to Sollux's and Karkat's where they throw insults at eachother but with these two it actually feels like their are annoyed at the other, Eridan's constant nagging at Kanaya to try to get her to help him with his ex

And Kanaya dont caring that much about Eridan's whining, a combination of already knowing the worlds is going to end and just dont caring about him going off in his racist ranting and probably because he has been bothering her for sweeps.

(Not?) that surprisingly, as a hero of hope, Eridan believes her instantly when she tells him about the end of the world. He has some type of appreciation/knowledge about her because he knew she wouldnt lie about that

He then proceeds to insult her again, they remind me of when your in a family reunion and are stuck babysitting the youngest spoiled annoying cousin in the family

She even taunts him, lying saying that Feferi has a crush on him just after he confesses he knows she doesnt tend to lie about that stuff and he believes for a minute before realizing ''oh she's fucking with me''

Its kinda funny, like he is very annoying but theyre like, kinda friends??? he definitly see's her as one even if he is such a dick about it. He even tries to give her advice so her (possible) relationship with Vriska doesnt ends up as just them being moirails.

They have a short kinda sweet talk RIGHT BEFORE he gets into a fight with Sollux and it sucks so much how it seemed like they would had become better friends, as he seemed less of an asshole, but at the same time, its also really scummy of him?

He already had the plan of joining Bec Noir and he never mentions Kanaya joining them, so he knew that he would kill Kanaya and he decided to do it in the worst way possible by destroying her hopes first and then killing her. Absolutely horrible i hate this, no wonder she doesnt pull back

Probably no the best sequel to the ''the beta trolls friendships'' post considering how it ends, but im not lying about their relationship lol hopefully next time i wont take that long to do a sequel to this one

[april13th2009]

Every day is just.

Thinks about Meenah as a character who doesn't want to feel as though she's hurting her friends and cares more about that than actually not hurting her friends. Thinks about "you know how it is someones gotta take care of the guy anyways" and the equation of dehumanization with care and the Beforean blood hierarchy as a systemic ableism analogy. Thinks about the perception of disabled people as burdens and Meenah's abdication being about not wanting to be chained down to anything. Thinks about Meenah as a character desperate to feel like she has autonomy/control in her life, but not necessarily wanting power, as more responsibility feels like less control. Thinks about social differences in Alternia vs Beforus leading to Meenah choosing to abdicate on one world but not the other. Thinks about Porrim's musings on fate where she references the life decisions of Mindfang and the Dolorosa (separately) and about the potential effect of that knowledge on her relationship with Aranea. Thinks about Aranea's fate vs free will talk with Terezi. Thinks about how similar Kankri's insecurities are to Meenah's and Aranea's, and how much more like them he probably would've ended up being if the Signless had been as shit a person as Mindfang or the Condesce. Thinks about the insidiousness of "I'd address my involvement with that, 8ut you seem to 8e tapping your foot so I think I'll just skip over that part of the story" and wonders if Aranea like Meenah felt guilt over actions never taken by her but by someone she spoke of in first person. Thinks about how I love Meenah when she's well-written and hate half the writing choices made with her. Thinks about how I [said through gritted teeth] like the vast majority of the writing choices made for Aranea, even if I'm screaming and crying about how they gave me the most autistic girl ever and then made her a Mindfang fan.

Thinks about Latula Pyrope's internalized sexism and how her personality revolves around "yeah I'm a girl BUT I still have value and deserve respect because I'm so good at [things that one can't easily or safely do while blind] let me prove myself please" and her influence on Terezi's mental state during the timeskip. Thinks about Latula's black lipstick and apparent eyeliner despite always wearing sunglasses, and how on her sprite it looks like her shoes have heels despite her constant skateboarding, and how cool it would've been if Terezi was butch. Thinks about how we see Terezi rping with Nepeta and flarping with Vriska and Team Charge and playfully flirting with Dave and Karkat and how over time every one of those people she was closest to was either killed and/or someone she distanced herself from until she had no one. And then until she had Vriska again. Thinks about how the moment I heard Terezi's "luck doesn't actually matter" line I was convinced she would kill Vriska and cheered aloud at being proven right. Thinks about Vriska killing Tavros and Tavros refusing to kill Vriska and Tavrisprite killing themself. Thinks about how the Vriska godtier scene was my favorite thus far in the entire comic and Tavros could be such a good character if Hussie also gave a shit about his characterization when Vriska wasn't there. Thinks about Vriska kissing Tavros as another way of challenging him, meaning that she knew he didn't want it. Thinks about Vriska kissing Tavros because she wanted to make him more like herself and SHE wanted to be given affection but could only conceptualize it through adversity. Thinks about the Summoner loving and killing Mindfang and Tavros doing neither for Vriska- “Too l8 to kiss me, too l8 to kill me”. Thinks about how Vriska grew up with a primary source stating that the person she idolized, who she had survived through emulating, was a rapist, and the effects that had on Vriska’s conceptualization of consent. Thinks about Mindfang brainwashing the Dolorosa to love her vs Vriska not being able to bear doing the same to Tavros. Thinks about Mindfang making the Dolorosa question her free will vs Vriska trying to force Tavros to take more initiative. Thinks about Vriska's Captain Hook parallels (pirate missing an arm and an eye, waiting for a character representing time to come kill her) and her fairy dress. Thinks about Kanaya making that for her, and the kiss acting as a power play against Kanaya too; Tavros was her friend. Thinks about how annoying it is when moirallegiance gets reduced to being wholesome besties by fans, when in canon no troll social dynamic on Alternia can be separated from their larger social norms facilitating abuse. Thinks about how trolls also had quadrants prescratch and wonders how Beforean social norms impacted that. Thinks about how annoying it was of the romance explanation to go "oh yeah being in a matespritship is just like normal human romance, moving on" instead of giving us anything new/more interesting. Thinks about "she keeps 8ugging me. 8ugging and fussing and meddling… I guess it's flattering that she wants to talk to me so much though. I guess I don't mind. It's cool". Thinks about how Vriska, having methodically destroyed her relationship with Kanaya, cries for her attention in Alterniabound by mockingly implying that it was Tavros Kanaya liked. Thinks about how glad I am that Kanaya got out of that relationship. Thinks about how, at Rose's "strive to pacify me as I scuffle down this black corridor" comment, Kanaya immediately asserts that she doesn't want to do that, and thinks about how HAPPY I am for her to be setting healthy boundaries. Thinks about how my favorite character Terezi will never beat the Vriskaliking allegations ever in her life.

Thinks about my stupid little webcomic thinks about my stupid little webcomic thinks about my stupid little webcomic

[bad-pun-king]

I’ve been getting into homestuck recently and stumbled across classpects as a concept awhile ago. I got curious and went to see if any Wildbow protagonists had been given classpects in crossover speculation. I was only able to find any for Taylor, probably because fans of both like to compare her to Vriska from what I’ve seen, with arguments for Taylor being a Page of Rage, Witch of Doom, or Bard of Heart.

I’d like to go over each protagonist personally, but it’s been too long since I read Worm, Ward, or Pact and reading those I was still all in on how the narrator sees things and bad at reading into the narration instead of just reading it, so those 3 all kind of blend together in my head too much for me to try them. I might do Sy, but I haven’t thought him much yet for it.

What I want to do right now is give classpects to Verona, Lucy, and Avery, based on my understanding of the classes and aspects I’ve been able to pick up.

Verona I would say is probably a Mage of Heart. Her arc has been more less about getting her to find a good place for her Self. She couldn’t really be herself with Brett always being nearby ready to whine to her about some bullshit or another, treating her as daughter and wife at the same time despite her age, and never appreciating any of the work she actually did until she just stopped doing it all together. Now she has her demesne that allows her to have her own home as she wants it, it’s become a hangout spot for all her closest friends, and she doesn’t have to worry about invaders doing any sort of harm to her, emotionally like Brett or even physically in most cases. Not to mention she can also easily interpret and communicate with nonverbal Others like Tashlit. But that’s just why I see her as Heart. For Mage it was more or less just that loves learning about her interests so much. She’s turning her demesne into a bookstore for books that were never written, she’s easily the most well-rounded in terms of understanding practices of the 3 Kennet Witches, and she’s even experimented with different things both mundane and magical to see how she likes them, such as that friends with benefits relationship she had with Jeremy for awhile or trying out Hosting, alchemy, enchantment, among other practices. I had also considered Void for Verona on account of how easy it is for her to play around with the truth without lying outright to confuse people, but ultimately her arc is more about getting from where she hated her life and circumstances so much she wanted to give up her humanity and become virtually anything else to getting where she’s perfectly comfortable being herself and flourishing under her own power, which to me reads with the idea that Heart is about the Inner Self.

Avery was probably the easiest of the trio. Maid of Blood. It’s my understanding that Blood is supposed to be about relationships and connections, and Avery has become something of an embodiment of networking with how many friends and contacts she’s built up over the course of Pale, and that’s all starting from a point where she could go months at a time without anybody noticing she hadn’t said a thing because of how disconnected she was. My understanding of a Maid is someone that takes care of, creates, and maintains their aspect, and boy howdy if Avery doesn’t do that. She literally goes to the edges of reality itself via the Paths to find contacts who’d otherwise be unable to contact anyone in a meaningful way in the form of Lost, who would all otherwise be to conceptually close to the ideas associated with Breath to get anywhere in their continued existences. Avery’s also the one of the trio most likely to allow an antagonist to redeem themself for similar reasons.

Lucy was the hardest one for me to get. I’d definitely peg her as a Knight, but I can’t decide if she fits better as a Knight of Hope or a Knight of Rage. I could see her as Hope because Hope players are described as “driven first and foremost by their convictions. They do right for right's sake, and are quick to come to the aid of anyone they deem to be experiencing injustice.” That sounds extremely Lucy, but Hope as a concept also seems to be connected to the use of positive emotions to empower and accomplish where as Lucy is not someone I would describe as being emotionally positive. She is almost always on guard in some way or another, always prepared to be ‘bullet-proof’ in as many ways as possible because she’s anticipating some asshole coming up and challenging her on some arbitrary thing. Even her Sight allows her to see specifically negative emotions and pain in the form of watercolor-esc stains. This is where interpreting her as less Hopey and more Ragey comes in. She’s very tired of the way the world is. She fights tooth and nail in arguments, in magic, in duels, and in Law to gain just a bit of ground even if it isn’t as much ground as she had wanted. Training under Guilherme and Bubbleyum does seem to have taught her to be coolheaded enough not to suppress her anger but to channel it for all those sorts of fights I mentioned. Rage at the injustices of the world and especially those right in front of her that she can do something about, is what fuels her. As for why I’d put her as a Knight, that’s because Knight is the closest to how she normally operates. She doesn’t seek the knowledge the way a Mage or Seer does, she doesn’t really fit homestuck’s idea of an Heir or (ironically) Witch, she doesn’t generate or heal like a Maid or Sylph, and she isn’t destructive of any aspect like a Prince or Bard, she isn’t taking to deprive from others like a Thief or Rogue, and she certainly isn’t as selfish as she could be with her defense of what she cares about like a Page. The idea that she serves Hope for the future or exploits her own Rage or whatever it is Knights are supposed to one-worded to, Knight fits the best of the classes.

Bonus bit, going purely based off vibes I’d say Verona and Lucy are both derse dreamers while Avery would be prospit.

I’d like to do the other protagonists too but like I mentioned above it’s been too long since I read Worm, Pact, or Ward for me to do Taylor, Blake, or Victoria. I still can and might do Sy, I only recently finished Twig so he’s still fresh enough on my mind I think I could, just not now. In the meantime I’d like seeing some other people try at any or all of them. Get some speculation going for wildbow protags other than Taylor.

[cherryflavoredfruitloops]

TLDR: eridan is me but an alien and a boy

me when my favorite character is one who is almost hated by the entirety of the fandom. if you didnt catch on, im talking about eridan ampora. son of a bitch, terrible person, troll version of a racist, ect. but its a lot of the parts that kind of get glossed over that make me love him. dont get me wrong, a lot of qualities of all the trolls get glossed over. but he reminds me of me, and that is both bad and good. now, in an ideal world, i wouldnt be talking about this since the place i am in in the comic is on the newer side of things, i am only on page 2456, a lot more to go, i am aware. however, i am impatient and loving sharing my thoughts on characters i like! also, i am not one of those people who hates feferi because she broke up with eridan, (i am aware of later parts in the comic, i liked watching videos on it but never had the motivation to read all of the pages) feferi had every right to do so since their relationship isnt the healthiest, (probably will make a separate post on that) and i also love feferi because she is just so silly. but thats off topic. say what you want about zodiac bias, eridan is weirdly like me. i know eridan did a lot of wrong, but so did vriska! (i know she has a redemption arc) (+i love her too) (i dont have many characters i hate) but no more introduction! time for the meat of this post.

i like eridan a lot because hes like me. (i know thats been stated at least 6 times by now) reason one, hes over dramatic with his emotions. i think of it as less of a drama queen/king thing, but more of a i am very emotional and have a hard time understanding my emotions, basically oversensitive. i myself am oversensitive.

in one of his earliest panels, hes criticizing himself for being stupid and trusting the same person whose been known to fuck with him. i did that for 3 years straight, where you can see all of the persons character flaws, but you still want to be their friend or want to date them. i would get so stupidly angry with myself since i knew they were a bad person, but still chose to hang around them. in a later one he reminisces on the good times he spent with vriska. sometimes, i do this. ill miss something about the person who fucked with me.

eridan is also a rude fucker! i am too, not proud of it, definitely need anger management or therapy or both. this is seen in his earliest appearance, not mention! his earliest mention is about a doomsday device. no, i am talking about the chat he had with kanaya. in this conversation, hes seen trying to manipulate/convince kanaya into auspiticing (horrendously spelt, i know) between him and vriska. hes very rude in his tactics, not a single nice one, as much as i remember from that chat. i hate to say this too, but i do do stuff like that sometimes. it gets hard and foggy for me to properly process what i want, or the nicest way for me to say what i want, so i just demand it. it often gets me in trouble, and is not a good thing to do.

next, is how he loves gossip. (wow, every second this turning more and more into pointing out the obvious and talking about how i relate to it instead of glossed over facts!) i like gossip. its fun to point out peoples flaws and make fun of them, not the nicest thing, but oh well. a lot like my other points, this is revealed in another really early panel of his. in his first pesterlog with feferi, she talks about how he talks more about his problems with his gossip bud than her. i too gossip. thats about it for that point, very weak point i know.

the orchestrating point of the night is super anti-climatic and feeds into that state the obvious joke i made. hes inlove with feferi. a long term moirail, who thinks of him as nothing more. hell! in the panel right after their first onscreen pesterlog shes talking about how she should tell him how she truly feels with a frown on her face, indicating she was already thinking of breaking up with him. she doesnt even pity him anymore, and hes wants to move onto a more redder quadrant with her. i, too, have fallen victim to this. you think of somebody romantically so long just to learn they dont like you romantically, maybe not even platonically. it shatters your world. though unlike eridan, i didnt kill the person i had crush on. i just felt sad for like a month because i had this crush on them for 2 years. (like eridan)

eridan is objectively a bad person and bad character. you dont have to like him the way i do, but for my sanity, please dont flame me for thinking like this. anyways, you are all amazing and i hope you have a good night/day/evening!

[red-elric]

its gotta mean something that disc two of homestuck was fucked up by terezi and had to be repaired by doc scratch and then disc (cartridge) three was fucked up by caliborn and had to be repaired by john right. like ahdjsh the discs mean so many things. disc two being literally scratched like the record scratch and healed by DOC scratch and also the corruption being caused by terezi while she was talking herself into blaming vriska for everything and murdering her and how she was kind of WRONG about a lot of it but also just the fact that events between disc two's repair and the insertion of disc three were all coming up in lord english's favor. doc scratch repaired the disc and it was always going to benefit his master's plan. but then also the hubris of caliborn fucking up the third disc when things were already going his way, as one more abstraction in how he brings about his own undoing. and also just the fact that it was JOHN, ALONE, who was able to repair the problem there. it was his quest and his power used to retcon the game over, and like. realistically, aranea caused the timeline to be doomed when she manipulated things to come back to life, that was it. getting the ring back probably would have fixed everything, even without vriska, even with rose and terezi both being somewhat out of comission. but terezi did the same thing again and let herself get carried away about vriska, this time in the opposite direction, and meddled until there was a stable timeline with vriska alive in it. undoing what she did when disc two was scratched in a much more active way than john probably would have left to his own devices (because john definitely doesnt have the same regrets about vriska as terezi does). and maybe it even means something the way act seven and end of act six felt cheap and unresolved, though it probably doesnt bc [obligatory hussie hates the fans]. idk tho just thinking

[daedalusdavinci]

spell homestuck

GOD. THIS IS SO MUCH LONGER THAN TWO FACE. i typed too much and theres too many qs so under the cut it goes

H - What is your favorite source text for fandom stuff (e.g., TV shows, movies, books, anime, Western animation, etc.)?

books!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! or....... i guess comics, these days, but i HATE READING COMICS they juST HAVE MORE COMPELLING FANDOMS. book fandoms are PUNY nad everyone is STUPID. youd think actual literary fandoms would have reading comprehension and understanding of literary critique but no!!!!!!!!!!!!! its literally my eternal fuckign struggle. somehow comic fandoms hit the perfect medium between compelling, readable content and the enthusiasm of cartoon fans without the childishness of cartoon fans

O - Choose a song at random. Which ship or character does it remind you of?

this isnt really a thing i do. the only time i associate characters w songs is my own ocs. barbies theme is miltons tower from the what remains of edith finch soundtrack!

M - Name a character that you’d like to have for a friend.

i have also never really been one to project myself into stories. its just not how i consume media. i think sollux and rose already closely resemble the kinds of friends i make, so maybe them?

E - Have you added anything cracky/hilarious to your fandom? If so, what?

(freddy fazbear vc) vanessa.... ive done things, im not proud of.

i dont even know if i want to answer this question bc its so fucking humiliating LKJSNDLFSDNFSDF the truth is yes. i am solely responsible for. a lot. particularly in the pjo fandom. i created several crackships ground up all on my own way back in 2014 and developed a following for them and i. dont wantto tell you what those ships were. LSKJDFNSLDJNSDFSDDF ive also pioneered many ship tags for other fandoms and i ship a lot of rarepairs and stuff but i dont think im RESPONSIBLE for them?? in that some ppl already were into them/talking abotu them or tht theyre still not popular (augh. to the ones that became popular) but i AM liTERALLY responsible for some crack shit in the pjo fandom and its. it haunts me sometimes. i dont want to talk about it. IF YOU REMEMBER WHAT I DID NO YOU DONT

S - Show us an example of your personal headcanon (prompts optional but encouraged)

this is so vague. my headcanons are shifting and nebulous and aus are my constant companion in everything, but uhhhhhhghhusjkdjnsdg i think. roxy writes the same way dave draws comics. its extremely memey and meta and self aware and largely just for the personal lolz, and were all doing her a disservice by pretending her writing looks like roses, when in reality dirk is probably the one whod make comics the way rose makes books (which is probably why he doesnt make comics). its more of that thing where roxy and dave are the same and rose and dirk are the same ykwim. well YOU dont corvus but im sure someone else does

T - Do you have any hard and fast headcanons that you will die defending?

jason takes after bruce in terms of like. adopting entirely too many kids. he broods

U - Three favorite characters from three different fandoms, and why they’re your favorites.

harvey is a heartwrenching character when written well, with a complicated view of morality, heartbreaking ties to our main hero, and a lot of internal conflict. something about such a hopeful character deadset on making a different in the system becoming a victim of it, and the potential he has as a vehicle for critiquing the law.

percy is my favorite character from pjo bc it was the very first time in my life i ever read a book and saw myself in it. hes aggressive, impulsive, and rebellious, he fidgets and has a hard time standing still, he acts on emotion without always thinking it through, he gets in trouble in school and hands his mom a murder weapon to kill his stepdad, hes just... hes a lot of the things ive always gotten in trouble for, things i couldnt help being, and hes a hero. he means everything to me.

vriska, i will maintain until the day i die, is one of the best homestuck characters- maybe just characters?- ever written. shes dramatic, shes impulsive, shes manipulative and mean and creative, and shes just so messy about it. shes a mean girl in a way that feels real, where her trauma impacts and shapes her as a person, and shes complex, with warring wants, and people she cares about, and dreams, and shes so messy. shes rough and rude and shes doing what SHE wants to, being a version of herself that feels right to HER, rather than some caricature of the hot badass evil lady. shes thirteen!! and she FEELS thirteen. shes a thirteen year old weird girl who is kind of an asshole, and she means literally fucking everything to me. shes a pirate!!!!! shes a swashbuckling badass dressing up in her larping outfit and yelling at her friends on the playground to swab the deck and she is the bestest ever, the end.

i didnt mean for each one of these to be longer than the last but here we are.

C - A ship you have never liked and probably never will.

i hate jdedave peace and love it just feels weird as hell to me. dave, for the most part, is hyper respectful of other peoples choices and boundaries but when it comes to jade hes always trying to mke choices for her, to protect her, and it gets to the point where even jade points out how much it bugs her. jades crush on dave also seems to come from a place of misunderstanding to me, admiring a lot of the parts of himself that he exaggerates and pretends to care about as a result of trauma. it always felt like a kid crush that they shouldve grown out of with time. dave also just sort of seems to... go along with whatever romantic relationships people push him into at that age, rolling with whoever flirts with him jsut bc hes trying to maintain the image of a player, so its really hard to take him seriously any time he hits on someone?

that is just my interpretation of it tho

K - What character has your favorite development arc/the best development arc?

well. i havent finished my reread of homestuck, so that feels difficult to comment on just yet, bc im sure ill have a different opinion when i do finish it. no one in dc gets character arc bc theyre all just undone immediately, so thats like. yeah. and in pjo the arcs are pretty weak bc 1) kids books and 2) RICK UNDOES THEM ALL. AUGH. regardless of all of this, i am going to say jason grace. he had a lot of development in like the last two hoo books, or maybe just like.... hints of how he couldve developed? promise? which rick immediately set fire to in toa when he killed him, but fUCKING WHATEVER. UGH.

anyway actually tho eleanor from the good place. bisexual icon. queen. probably one of the best character arcs of all time. the episode w her mom has some of the most powerful fucking dialogue ever and i think about it. all the time. i should rewatch the good place.....

[thewertsearch]

CEB: wait… CEB: are you saying that vriska is interested in me? CEB: like, romantically?

I think she thinks she likes you, the same way she thought she liked Tavros. In her eyes, you're a potential replacement for him, which is a dangerous position to be in.

In short: yes. But watch out!

CTG: do you like her CEB: well, like i said, i thought she was pretty cool… CEB: kinda bossy! but also pretty friendly. CTG: yeah ok CTG: but i mean CTG: anything more than that CTG: like CTG: if earth wasnt destroyed and she werent in some other universe on a planet full of unspeakable frothing dipshits CTG: and she was on earth visiting your town or something CTG: would you want to ask her to go see one of your dumbass movies

Dave is actually helping John talk through his feelings, which is sweet as all hell. His instincts around this are surprisingly good, too - it probably would help John to separate his feelings about Vriska from his current situation.

Try to divorce yourself from the session, just for a second. You're not John the Player - you're John the teenager, and a girl likes you.

What do you think about her?

CEB: i don't think i have ever actually liked a girl before in that way, so i am not really sure what i am supposed to feel or do…

Grew up in a small town in Suburbia, USA.

Raised by a single father who struggles to relate to him.

No extended family to speak of, unless you count the ecto-sister he learned about an hour ago.

Has a social circle consisting of three online besties, and never mentions any IRL friends.

Uses stilted phrases like 'not a homosexual', and is so confused by his own feelings that he can't identify a crush.

John Egbert is a very sheltered kid, is what I'm getting at. I wouldn't be surprised if Karkat and Vriska were the first people who ever had crushes on him. This is all completely new to John, and I don't think has the slightest idea how he's supposed to respond.

Dad's great, but if John asked him for relationship advice, he'd tell his son to get a decent aftershave and a well-pressed suit. He's flying blind, and things will only get more complicated from here on in.

CTG: did one of the human ladies reject you ?CG: OF COURSE NOT. CTG: how did it go did you stand in a quadrant like you were playing four square CTG: holding a bucket full of flowers or slime or whatever and jade was like no thanks bro

I mean, he might have started with John, but he seems to hate Jade quite a lot, too.

We now know this was after his confession to John. Maybe it was a rebound?

CTG: or maybe it was a guy who rejected you ?CG: FUCK OFF. CTG: haha wow bingo CTG: see how i look right now thats a poker face might want to take some notes ?CG: I SEE NOTHING BUT A COWARD BEHIND DARK EYEWEAR CLEARLY DESIGNED FOR WOMEN AND A PAIR OF IMPUDENT LIPS PURSED SO TIGHT IT'LL SOUND LIKE AIR SQUEALING OUT OF A BALLOON WHEN I PUNCH YOU IN THE GUT.

Pursed lips?

Karkat. No, Karkat, look at me. Do you have a little crush on all the human kids?

You do, don't you. Oh my god, you do. Just stay away from Rose, or Kanaya will chainsaw you in half.

?CG: AND JOHN, PURELY HYPOTHETICALLY, IF ONE OF US IN THE FUTURE DOES MAKE SOME SORT OF SOLICITATION YOU DON'T QUITE UNDERSTAND… ?CG: BECAUSE OF PERHAPS SOME CULTURAL DIFFERENCES ?CG: I MEAN NO ONE IN PARTICULAR HERE ?CG: MAYBE TRY TO UNDERSTAND THAT PERSON MIGHT NOT BE THINKING TOO CLEARLY AT THAT MOMENT

Karkat, you're killing me here. I'm dying. You don't get any Boondollars from killing a liveblogger, Karkat.

[davekat-sucks]

If there's one thing i don't like about this fandom it's how much they make the kids more meaner? Villainizing? Than they actually are. Don't get me wrong, they have done a lot of bad but like these characters are FRIENDS. They do genuinely care about eachother in the end they aren't cold hearted and revel in other's suffering, they aren't Caliborn or Vriska afterall. I think they read the comic wrong, the kids were willing to sacrifice their own lives for eachother, a prime example of this was Daves conversation with doomed Rose. I blame the spaceship meteor part of the story for ruining the characters. Like everyone acted so ooc? Why were Jade and Davesprite giving John such a hard time about his dad die dying? Both of them literally had to watch their guardians die in front of them, you'd think they'd be the most sympathetic here? Or how Dave and Karkat, characters who will go through lengths to protect their friends just fucking stand there as everyone else tears themselves or eachother apart? Karkat is an ass yes but this was the same guy who was crying his heart out when he saw Solluxs dead body when in game or how he told Aradia bot that he would've tried to get her back to life if it weren't for other circumstances. Why was everyone being so uncaring at this part? It didn't feel right. The alpha kids got it the WORST, from bad writing to fandom treatment. I remember back in the day seeing stuff where Dirk was just down right mean to Jane "hahaha sucks to be you Jake is mine fat bitch". There was even a little bit of this aggressiveness in House of Dirk, now i do find that story fun but the small part where he calls Jane "xenophobic", bothered me. Like he would NOT say that to her. Have you seen how he speaks to her? "If you ever need help, Jane. If you're ever in any trouble at all. Let me know. Just say the word." Same guy who built a robot to protect her life and pretty much wrote an entire book for her, i think Dirk cares about Jane guys. This fandom and comic is so mean to Jane, as funny as i thought it was that Caliborn called her a fat fucking pig and cow, she really just became a punching box at that point. They'll shit on her because she's a woman getting in the way of the gay men. The ONLY thing people get from her as a character is that she's fat, because Caliborn said so along with a bunch of other things. Jake, poor Jake, gets sexualized by everyone he knows and had to burn his Grandmothers body right in front of him. But according to fans HE'S the asshole here because he cant communicate properly. Gee i wonder why. Roxy gets put on a fucking pedestal by the comic and fans, super extra special treatment. Ignore how she sexually harasses Dirk or almost killed Jane, no she's incapable of doing wrong, isn't that right Calliope? Yes, Roxy should be the new leader AND kill the Condescension yes. Now i never finished reading the epilogues because why would i? I'm probably missing a lot if we're taking them into consideration but not taking it into consideration because my point still stands because thats how the fandom treated them even before those came out. And even when talking about the base comic i still see those attitudes.

These characters DO have their personal problems but when people talk about they insert angst where it doesn't exist for favor of projection and i hate how common its become.

If people claim it is just cynicism that comes with growing up, there's clearly a difference between being cynicism, nihilism, and being a straight up asshole. If people say it is Dave and Karkat's depression is the reason why they stand around doing nothing as Rose becomes alcoholic and Terezi gets abused by Gamzee, it's sure strange they got over their depression right as VRISKA comes in to solve everything and those two bastards act like nothing had happened. Everything by Act 6 and Post Retcon just made all the characters worse. They have become an empty shell of who they used to be. The bleak outlook has become a theme for current Homestuck. It's been like this for Epilogues and Homestuck^2 too. I don't know if James Roach and HICU can really save the franchise and get out of all the characters having this negative light. Andrew Hussie and WhatPumpkin has shoved this jaded feeling right in the audience's faces that it's become the norm to expect the worse. Readers expect characters being assholes and more depression, they will receive it because Hussie and WhatPumpkin made it so.

[4lph4kidz]

Bro Strider? Or Vriska ig. Or maybe Nepeta

fuck it i'll do all of them

bro strider

Sexuality Headcanon: gay, probably closeted, definitely weird about it

Gender Headcanon: transjackass (stealth)

A ship I have with said character: uhh. i don't endorse this man kissing people. bro + grandpa I GUESS in certain contexts but i dont really trust like that. the ones i do trust are real ones who know who they are

A BROTP I have with said character: do you have ANY idea how insane the idea of beta roxy and dirk knowing each other makes me. it breaks me.

A NOTP I have with said character: can i put bro / grandpa in otp AND notp??? it really depends, i dont see it handled in a way im cool with most of the time yknow

A random headcanon: he has lots of tattoos.

General Opinion over said character: sorry. i kind of hate him. but it's mostly because i know fuck all about him and it's hard for me to extrapolate stuff about him from dirk because for me dirk's such an obvious product of his environment? and dirk's most shining redeeming quality is his love for his friends and loved ones. bro does not have that to anywhere the same extent so he's just. some shithead i guess. he has some of the same motivations and beliefs by the looks of it, and like yeah there's also the evil puppet rotting his brain but i still think a lot of the stuff that is wrong with him is his own fault. idk, it's hard for me to be kind about him after a certain point in his life, but i am kind of enamoured with young kid shithead bro in the 80s just being kind of a terror to everyone. just... dirk but worse.

vriska

Sexuality Headcanon: 8i

Gender Headcanon: transfem

A ship I have with said character: vrisrezi, again, is the most ever

A BROTP I have with said character: fuck it. vriska and arquius are funny

A NOTP I have with said character: uh nothing's coming to mind except meenvris and tavris which is like. duh.

A random headcanon: she bites

General Opinion over said character: vriska (vriska) is a character designed from the ground up to be divisive. i'm not aggressively pro-vriska but i definitely think she is a good character. not necessarily a good person but she's interesting to follow, she's flawed, she's dealing with a lot of fucked up shit, and she makes some very wrong and outright cruel choices, but ultimately she's just a kid from a terrible world that forced a lot of trauma and violence on her. i like her. nepeta

Sexuality Headcanon: pan aro

Gender Headcanon: nonbinary transmasc, rip nepeta you would've loved neopronouns

A ship I have with said character: jadedavenep maybe. that could be cute.

A BROTP I have with said character: i mean meowrails is right there but i think her dynamic with terezi was cute too.

A NOTP I have with said character: none

A random headcanon: she bites too

General Opinion over said character: nepeta is a very likeable character whose life implies some interesting stuff about alternian society. she might not have a big role in the story but i do love her! i think she's great, sincerely.

[computerpeople]

TWO QUESTIONS THIS TIME >:D is juno an antagonist to you, and what would his worst/best traits be?

lets see.

i dont think juno is an antagonist or a bad person, but in his session he definitely was AN antagonist, he was grim dark! and he was for most of his sburb game, until they very very end. BUT... junos kind of whatever the narrative needs him to be. i think naturally though, deep down, he really is a good person. he wants to be so badly, despite his lack of empathy, he really does care and have a lot of compassion in him. he's not apathetic towards ANYTHING, he just doesn't know how to empathize with other peoples feelings, and is only able to understand his own and assumes that others are the same as his. i think he is a good person who often does bad things. i am exaggerating his bad traits a bit, i think including the fact that his dad was abusive, and that his sister was already godtier, and that he was not in control of his body most times his boyfriend ended up dying (or that a lot of those instances were just bc me and tazz wanted to rp angst and it weasnt actually that serious) but in general all light players have this sort of "good guy bad guy" sort of thing going on, while all tryuing to do what they think is smart and right. i wouldn't call vriska an antagonist, yknow? juno doesnt do things because he thinks itll forever bhurt the person, or hope they really really do get hurt or scared (unlike jaxi, thats one of their big differences, jaxis goal IS to create harm) he bjust thinks thats how people have fun. most of his friends that i said he's stabbed as well are ALSO like that, juno has almost exclusively troll or inhuman friends who express love or excitement with violence, so its not like hes just stabbing people for fun, yk? and his boyfriends pretty much the same way, very pro violence. i dont think juno can be fit into a label like that easily. the best i can come up with is "good guy who does bad things" but not an antihero. the reverse of an antihero i think. hero who wants to do good but ends up causing more pain in the process due to lack of experience and naivity

JUNOS BEST TRAIT: he has two that are tied i think, his compassion/drive to help people in need, and his need to entertain others. i think he is a very fun person to be around as long as he doesnt get riled up too much and is quite fun to just WATCH even from a distance, and hes painfully generous. if he has something he is 100% willing to share it, or give it away in general. hes silly, he loves giving gifts, he loves making people laugh, he loves creating amazing art for people to enjoy, he loevs doing bits with people, he loves plays and theatre. hes just fun, yk? if someone is in need even if he HATES THEM SO BAD he wants to help them, the only exclusion being his dad. in the server he let harry du bois sleep in his house and gave himm food and clothes, and takes care of his pet possums because harry is too incapable and drunk to take care of himself or his pets, despite juno REALLY hating harry and harry constantly crossing his boundaries.

JUNOS WORST TRAIT: hubris hubris hubris. his hubris is THE worst one, by far. he thinks he is more aware, and much smarter than MOST people around him due to his light powers (hes not) and tends to think hes invincible because of it. this leads him to making stupid, horrible decisions, or trusting people he shouldnt, or him walking over peoples feelings and boundaries because he thinks what he needs to get across is more important. and the second one would probably be his lack of empathy yeah. btu even that wouldn't be so bad if it werent for his massive ego. he really does think he is the most important person in the world, and that he is the only one who can create good or bad in the world. due to his meta awareness he really does think hes the protagonist of any story hes in (even when he genuinely is not) and sees everything reliant on HIM and HIS decisions.

anywas i love you me when i get fun asks

[29pageshomestuckeveryday]

Homestuck, page 2,629

Terezi: Open memo.

Author commentary:

The R41NBOW RUMPUS P4RTYTOWN is one of the more "Terezi" contributions Terezi has made to the story. Possibly only second to the time she uses her own blood to write instructions that rewrite the whole story to bring Vriska back to life, or when she preemptively convinces herself to dump Karkat before anything even starts. This whole memo is made primarily to troll Karkat, roast him for his own self-important memos, and provide a fun environment everyone likes better—a nice, easy-going space where they can have a good time and do some roleplaying (which is also meant to own Karkat). Also, he's not allowed to post. Of course, if Terezi really knew what was going on, she wouldn't have to work that hard to own him at all about his plan to troll the humans. She could just keep mercilessly pointing out that the only reason he wants to do it at all is because he has a hate-crush on the nerdy human boy.

Even though the trolls are at the end of their adventure, the attitude of everyone under Karkat's leadership is pretty much the same as it was when they began: much skepticism and ridicule surrounding his orders, with no one particularly inclined to take him all that seriously. Maybe it's because they're just used to acting this way by now. But the deeper reason is that all of Karkat's orders, everything he insists on as being "urgent," revolve around some unwitting need to serve his own objectives rather than something that serves everyone's needs in a clear way. At the beginning, he was desperately trying to pull the team together to play Sgrub, but mainly so he could prove himself as a great leader and a ruthless warrior. Here he's trying to get everyone on board with harassing some alien kids they don't know, basically for some combination of satisfying his own petty grievances and wanting an excuse to hate-crush on John some more. So when everyone's response to his "plan" is some variation on "Dude, this makes no sense at all," it's because…it doesn't.

Terezi tells a confused Gamzee from weeks ago to go peruse other memos. Perhaps ones that get started on the meteor in the future? Ones written during more fraught and suspenseful circumstances than this? How much advance reading has Gamzee been doing? How much studying? Planning? Biding his time? Makes you wonder, is all I'm saying. But it doesn't make you wonder too much, because we quickly get distracted by about 500 consecutive lines of Karkat and Terezi banning each other as they fight over the same keyboard. In the last book, I told you we would be reaping great rewards from these memos. I would never lie to you. Not ever, about anything. I would never risk jeopardizing this special bond of trust we have.

They have a point here. While it's funny to see the results of their keyboard mashing and mutual banning warfare in the form of the resulting memo text, we don't really get to see them do all this. We can only imagine what it looks like. So we also have to picture them typing these entire statements to each other on the same keyboard. And there's no way that can possibly work unless they take turns, where one troll waits patiently while the other is composing a testy remark to the other, right in front of them. It's a completely absurd way to have an argument. It probably also qualifies as another log on the Karezi fire, for those keeping score at home. It's important to keep score of all those logs. That way, you'll know the precise quantity of precious shipping lumber that gets erased from history once I retcon-shitcan their entire relationship off the website.

[hegoeshardasfuck]

definitely just friends

wordcount: 2.9K

tags: fluff and smut, semi-public sex, living together, crossdressing, biting, highschool bathroom sex, fingering, human/troll society, they're mature in Troll years but in human years they should be in school, porn with some plot

synopsis: Eridan and Karkat are roommates, they go to human school, they share a bed, they're perfect friends, a little bit of spiked punch probably can't change the just friends bit.

note: erikar go brrrrrrrr, i love it when a twink in a dress dominates a short dude, it makes my brain happy. hope ya'll enjoy and if ya do considering dropping a like or checking the Ao3 port.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/42964926

Eridan Ampora and Karkat Vantas have been living together for three months now.

They shared a small apartment, the rest of the Trolls on the same floor as well. It was in the middle of a small city that a lot of Trolls have integrated into. The locals don't seem to mind them at all, some are willing to learn tradition and display it in small ways as well. The four humans that had moved there with them would've acted as ambassadors if not for cousins of Trolls already existing there.

Of course, tension is high as the need for quadrants slowly dissolves for Trolls and desire to learn about it intensifies for humans. Its awkward as the Trolls explain why the quadrants ever existed to the humans, some of them are disgusted, others intrigued. A good deal of them try so hard to find a way to accommodate for lack quadrant fillers for Trolls, and most succeed.

Which resulted in Sollux finding a new partner to be his Kismesis, leaving Eridan behind completely. Eridans flush crush, who he really says he didn't have one for, has also left him behind for Aradia who has flesh again and can forgive and love. His second choice of Kismesis is already out there vacillitating with Tavros, and he can't handle the lack of concuspicent romance in his life. And even he doesn't really hate Vriska, he wouldn't fuck her if he got paid to do it, and his flush crush, well, that one is already taken by someone.

Eridan hasn't been doing very well since joining earth.

And Karkat has to deal with his stupid brooding the entire time he goes through it even as he deals with his own problems. Dave and John have started dating, giving thanks to him for closing the gap and that they could still be friends. His Kismesis and Matesprit alike now lost in an endless romance between each other and hes a third wheel onxe again. His second idea for flush crush and hated rival have also found new partners, flush crush with Equius and hated rival with Feferi. He didn't really hate Nepeta, or flush for Aradia when he thought about it, he just told himself that he did to make up for lack of intense romance.

Karkats life hasn't been treating him very good either.

And Eridan feels he has to deal with his annoying brooding throughout all of it even with his own problems in his life.

But they wouldn't take a different roommate for anything.

All of their friends keep on saying that if its tense they should just get a different roomie and switch with someone. They always say no in a fierce tone, a hiss of protective obsession in their voice as they do so.

They've shared an apartment for so long it would be impossible to just stop at this point.

The soft vibrating hum emitting from gills whenever Eridan sleeps that soothed Karkats insomnia riddled nights. The nubby horns digging into his back because of Karkat being impatient for affection. The sheer terror on Eridans face whenever Karkat starts cooking anything on the stovetop. The sleep talking declarations of loving each other after getting blankets yanked or kicks in the back. And the teasing jokes and jabs at how stupid their crushes are for leaving a Troll as perfect as the other.

Without any of that…

There would be nothing worth waking up for.

And they can't see that.

It took their friends a while, but eventually they noticed the subtle signs even they are ignorant to.

During parties they always idle at each others sides or even go so far as dancing together sometimes in non formal areas. When they all go eat out only one needs to order as they know for each other and get defensive if an order is messed up. If they ever head to a big city on vacation or just for a short visit their arms are always intertwined so they don't get lost.

Sure, it isn't subtle, but they don't realize just how important they are to each other.

Misery loves company their friends supposed.

And they still all had one last year of human school, so they attended it for the last few months. None of them learned anything they didn't already know, except for Terezi who learned about the legal system. It was a very stressful place on earth and their four human friends helped them coast from class to class day to day as the survived.

Then prom was revealed.

A big ass fucking dance that was formal, it had a dress code of something nice and a ruleset of no alcohol, drugs or sex.

All the Trolls where beyond sure that at least two of those rules got broken each year, Dave nodded solemnly at the statement. Dave explained prom to the best of his ability with the help of his human friends and the Trolls all nodded along.

And then Dave explained that a partner was a necessity, that had Karkat and Eridan freezing, the rest already had one, and they didn't. Sure they could go as friends as a last resort, but they were two guys, that still isn't really a thing on earth. They bartered with Dave and the principal and teachers alike as to allowing gay couples into the prom, or a pair of affectionate friends at least, they all said it was unheard of.

Fine then.

Be that way teaching system.

Eridan was a lot more furious than Karkat who was fine not going cause they had no partners, Eridan wanted to go so bad though. They couldn't say they were gay, not allowed, and they couldn't go as friends either. Luckily, Eridan made a very convincing lady, all it took was a change of glasses and a purple dress and he was golden, effeminate already.

Now, shockingly enough despite all the time they spend together, Karkat had never seen Eridan in a dress.

So when the Violet blood walked out of the bathroom, he had Karkat sputtering.

"Well, pretty convincing right?" Eridan asked, this specific dress a deep purple form fitting at his waist but looser everywhere else, especially his chest, which on the dress he had sewn a small amount of fluff into.

Karkat was speechless, he could barely form a thought as his face burned a bright red. By the time was getting close to forming a thought Eridan did a few twirls to make sure it wouldn't start riding up or the streps start slipping down. It took Karkat a whole minute to form a single sentence.

"You have hips?" Was what Karkat said, it had Eridan grinning.

"Of course I do, I just don't show it off like some whore on their nineth sweep," Eridan stated, rolling his eyes just a little bit as he did so.

"Right, right, quick question," Karkat said, Eridan raised a brow between now almost oval glasses, they were a lot less square and more rounded and sharp at the top corners, like cat eyes, "how come I've never seen you in a dress before?"

"You have, I wear them all the time in public, you just never realized it was me," Eridan explained as he began searching for his extremely short coat, it had three quarter sleeves and was black with his symbol embroidered on the chest pocket.

"Ah, ok, do you know where my suit is?" Karkat asked, looking to the floor, noticing Eridan was wearing light purple lace up sandal-esque shoes that had heels at least an inch thick.

"Yes I know where that pathetic item is, look in your closet, it should be there," Eridan said as he slid on his coat, he made his way to the bathroom next to start doing some light makeup.

"Thanks!" Karkat shouted through the walk to Eridan as he changed, thinking real long and hard about that dress, gog he would look amazing in one of Kanayas old skirts.

Fifteen minutes passed full of witty banter and Eridan correcting how Karkat tucked in his shirt and did his hair and so on. By the time they were finished preparing, Karkat was still a scuzzy little fuck with an effeminate friend who was absolutely slaying. Eridan was a bit disappointed he couldn't convince Karkat to use a single layer of black lip stain as it would make his lips pop more.

But alas, time was up and the clock was ticking and they were on their way down, finding a seemingly fine Bro Strider who was freaking out on the inside as Trolls piled into his truck with extensions. Most of them were in dresses and suits, except for Gamzee who found his cleanest shirt and nicest pants and called it a day, Kanaya just wearing what she always did with a different shirt. Five humans and two Trolls sat in the front end of the truck, ten Trolls piled up and compacted in place like Tetris in the back of the truck.

The drive may have been externally short, but the mix of country, ska and punk blasting from the speakers made it feel longer. The entire ride Bro was gripping the steering wheel beyond tight, if he accidentally fucked up, he could he held accountable for how many deaths? More than he could normally imagine being held accountable for, so he tried to silence chitchat with music.

When they arrived, Bro opened the trunk and a group of Trolls fell to the pavement, rebounding instantly. Everyone gave their prompt thanks to Bro before heading inside, Dave leaving with a short squeeze of a hug.

Now, the dance in itself was chaos.

People fucking everywhere, music so damn loud, the amount of movement, oh fuck it was crazy. All of the Trolls stuck together, most of them breaking into smaller groups until they were separated into pairs of two. Their was dancing, and they danced hard, they were what, eight songs in when two headed to the punch table. Eridan and Karkat, they each grabbed a cup and poured one for each other, clinking glasses. They drank swiftly, and it almost burned on the way down, oh yeah, this was spiked. That fact alone had Eridan going for seconds, Karkat as well, it was fun, it was breaking the rules, they didn't care.

And then, at this point Eridans gills were fluttering as a telltale sign he was starting to get a hit tipsy, a slow song started playing.

The two made eye contact, Karkat holding out a hand that Eridan grabbed as they made their way to the center of the room where every other pair was.

"Can I have this dance?" Karkat asked, it was a stupid question.

"Of course, my good sir," Eridan faked a curtsy as he spoke, giving a soft giggle as he took Karkats hands.

Sure, the song was slow, but it was picking up, and with it, so did Eridan and Karkat. Where most stayed slow even as the song called for flair, the two started going faster. Eventually they had their chests flush against each other and were practically sharing breathes, arms splayed out. Then they continued after a short moment, hitting John and Dave who were trying not to get caught, they didn't make a deal out of it. By the end of it all, Eridan had Karkat dipping to the ground, he was burning up, feisty bitch of a Violet blood. Eridan was grinning as he pulled up Karkat, nearly giggling, he was so flustered, it was just a simple move he learned.

"Oh fuck me," Karkat muttered as he gripped Eridans hand tightly, dragging him away from the crowd, the sight of his face peppered in a booze blush of Violet to much to handle.

"We should tell, one of our friends first," Eridan said as they traversed to the exit of the gymnasium.

"They know someones gonna fuck, this years its us, where did the stalls go?" Karkat questioned as he pulled Eridan out the door and into the near vacant halls where they could find Rose and Kanaya chatting, they almost went to speak before seeing the two of them heading for the washrooms.

"Hook a left," Eridan said as though it was fact.

And Karkat did hook a left, he hooked a left so hard Eridan nearly tripped on his sandals. Karkat threw open the washroom doors, finding some poor fool making use of one of the urinals, they saw and didn't say a word about it. It was Eridan who threw Karkat into the stall, slamming the door shut and their backs pressed against either side with a very small amount of wiggle room.

"I'm sorry," Eridan mumbled, this felt so wrong and so right, a mutant with a Violet, he was saying sorry but why, instinct, a reflex, on Alternia both would be culled.

"Fuck me," was what Karkat said, unable to produce much more as he yanked off his suit pants, bulge staining underwear red already, Eridan hiked up his skirt, tying it in place with a belt and safety pins, his bukge also coming undone.

Eridan gripped Karkats middle, gently lifting him off the ground, Karkat pressed his feet to the wall across from him as he was pressed to the other wall. Oh fuck, this stall is gonna be wrecked, his bulge writhes and oozes red that drips to tile floor below. Eridan grips it, claws digging in slightly, and Karkat moans his sweet moan, so, so perfect. Eridan continues to run his claws along sensitive flesh, dipping barely into the nook as he presses kisses and marks along Karkats neck.

Claws threaten to tear open the black tuxedo as they go to undo buttons and get more skin, its smattered in red due to the amount pumping through Karats blood. Karkats hands are pressed against the stall wall as Eridan fondles him and traces fangs along the soft flesh of his neck, biting and suckling to make a point. He'll be covered in bruises by the end of this, he releases another moan as the base of his bulge is gripped. He cums on the spot, a copious amount of slurry escaping him and staining the floor below.

Eridans bulge is writhing, livid it hasn't gotten any attention yet and the Violet blood is panting as he marks his lover in bites. He digs two fingers into Karkats nook, he nearly shrieks as claws threaten to tear but don't. His insides are velvet soft, and they ooze red, Eridan pumps his fingers and more red slips out between them. The scent alone is delectable, so sweet and intoxicating it has his gills fluttering as he presses closer to Karkat until their chests are against each other again.

Karkats panting and hot breath washes over Eridan as he brings his slurry coated fingers to his lips and sucks off the material. The taste is fine to him, rich and fruity with a hint of metal, he supposes not many others would find it delicious as well. He doesn't care, he brings Karkat in for a kiss, one tongue forked the other not, one of his hands keeps Karkats wrist pressed to the stall, the other guiding bulge into nook. Karkats eyes flutter shut for a moment as he moans into the kiss, Eridans bulge thick in his nook and oozing Violet that drips between their legs to the floor below.

Its perfect, all of this.

Sure, Karkats just a little bit tipsy and not thinking along the lines of Kismesis and Matesprit, or any of those. He doesn't really care though, he just knows this moment is perfect. He's sure Eridan feels the same way as well, but Karkat is mentally blanking to much to make a snide remark.

Getting railed by a femboy in a school bathroom.

His life has peaked.

Eridans grinding into him, hitting deeper and deeper into his nook each time their pelvises meet. And the kiss only gets fiercer, Eridan starts giving bits of bite into the kiss as fangs trade tongue and lip. Karkat, he's fine, his bulge is fucking flailing uselessly, unable to find the nook waiting for penetration, or for a bucket. Eridan ends up gripping Karkats bulge again, this time much more gently as he picks up the pace of his thrusting. Eventually Eridan starts panting as well, velvety tightness, beautiful sounds, glorious sights at his face its all to much to handle.

With a strangled moan, even more Violet and Candy Red slurry gushes to the tile below.

Karkats legs are limp, he's panting like a whore as he tries to regain balance in the stall and pull on his pants. Eridan has a bit more class, he takes a wad of single ply and uses it to clean up his thighs, bulge retreating. The two stumble out of the stall giggling a little bit as they make there way to the sink.

As they wash their hands just for the sake of habit and splash water on their face John and Dave walk in. They're flushed, kissing and biting at each other barely able to keep it together as they stumble into a stall. The stall they stumble into is not the one Eridan and Karkat ruined, they stare at gelatinizing slurry and floor and one wall of the stall, that is a janitors nightmare. The two share a quick look of remorse for the poor janitor whose gonna have to clean up that mess before leaving.

They'll have to do something like that again.

After working out what quadrant they're in.

It's gonna be hard explaining the slurry running down Karkats legs on the ride home.