#incorrect quotes: source: Monty Python and the Holy Grail

[skullmakesmelaugh]

Marissa: I am your queen!

Marissa: Long may I reign

George: Well I didn’t vote for you

Marissa: You don’t vote for queens

Holly: How’d you become queen then?

Marissa: Ezekiel, his head wreathed in the purest shimmering golden light, held aloft this bracelet from the bosom of the garden, signifying by divine providence that I, Marissa, was to carry Talent. That is why I am your queen

Skull: Listen, strange apparitions lying in gardens distributing bracelets is no basis for a system of government

Kipps: Supreme executive power derives from a mandate from the masses, not from some farcical supernatural ceremony

Marissa: Be quiet

Skull: You can’t expect to wield extreme executive power just because some ghostly tart threw jewellery at you

Marissa: Shut up

Flo: I mean, if I went round saying I was an emperor just because some apparition had lobbed a bracelet at me, they’d put me away

Marissa: Shut up! Shut up! Will you shut up

Marissa: *releases Ezekiel*

Lucy: Ah, now we see the violence inherent in the system

Marissa: Shut up!

Lucy: COME AND SEE THE VIOLENCE INHERENT IN THE SYSTEM

Lockwood: HELP HELP I’M BEING REPRESSED GHOST-LOCKED

Marissa: BLOODY PEASANT

[shit-the-vampyr-cast-never-said]

Fergal: ‘Tis but a scratch!

Jonathan: A scratch? Your arm's off!

Fergal: No it isn’t!

Jonathan, pointing to the arm on the ground: Well, what’s that then?

Fergal: …I’ve had worse.

[roseofithaca]

Dutch, with his arm around John: One day, son, all this will be yours! *gestures to the camp*

John: What, the tents?

[sonictacocat]

Renfield, eating spiders: I'm invincible!

Seward: you're a looney

[sepublic]

Us: Sweet, sweet Lucy! You shall not have died in vain!

Lucy: Uh, I’m not quite dead you guys!

Us: ...Well you shall not have been mortally wounded in vain-

Lucy: I think I could pull through, everyone!

Us: ...Oh we see.

Lucy: Actually, I think I’m alright to come with you-

Us: NO NO, SWEET LUCY! Stay here, we will send help as soon as we’ve accomplished a daring and heroic quest in our own particular...

Lucy: Idiom?

Us: Idiom!

Lucy: No I feel fine actually-

Us: FAREWELL SWEET LUCY

Lucy: I’ll uh- I’ll just stay here then, shall I guys?

[miae-bee]

Stoick, looking down the town through the window: One day, lad, all this will be yours

Hiccup: What, the curtains?

Stoick: No, not the curtains

[nerevar-quote-and-star]

Ondolemar: Work and you'll never do what you love a day in your life. ❤️

[incorrectfilm]

Thorin: *gesturing out the window to the Kingdom of Erebor* One day lad, all this will be yours.

Fíli: The curtains?

Thorin: No not the curtains!

[peanut-gallery92]

Possessed!Airk: "I am your king!"

Jade: "Well, I didn't vote for you."

[incorrect-hs-quotes]

Aradia: listen, strange w0men lying in p0nds is n0 basis f0r a system 0f g0vernment

Aradia: supreme executive p0wer derive fr0m a mandate 0f the masses, n0t s0me farcical aquatic cerim0ny

Equius: D-> Be quiet!

Aradia: y0u can't expect t0 wield supreme executive p0wer just because s0me watery tart threw a sw0rd at y0u

Equius: D-> Shut up!

Aradia: i mean, if i went ar0und saying i was the empress just because s0me m0istened bint l0bbed a scimitar at me, they'd put me away

Equius, grabbing to arrest her: D-> Shut up! Would you just shut up?!

Aradia: n0w we see the vi0lence inherent t0 the system!

Equius: D-> Shut up!

Aradia: c0me and see the vi0lence inherent t0 the system! help! help! i'm being repressed!

[weirdkev27]

Tibbles: What is your name?

Eda: Eda the Owl Lady.

Tibbles: What is your quest?

Eda: To stop Emperor Belos and get my human home.

Tibbles: What is right ratio of black roots to iron ash for a lead foot potion during a half moon?

Eda: What do you mean? Is it a Waxing or a Waning Moon?

Tibbles:*confused* I don’t know that. *screams as he’s shot into the air and into the pit*

Luz: How do you know so much about moons?

Eda: You have to know these things to be the most powerful witch in the Boiling Isles.

[vigilantes-incorrect-quotes]

Aizawa: You stupid bastard, you’ve got no arms left!

Koichi: It’s just a flesh wound.

[incorrectmidwaymortalkombat]

Jade: What makes you think Kitana is a traitor to Outworld?

Mileena: She killed me!

Jade: She... Killed you?

Mileena: Well, I got better.

[junemo10]

Arthur: shut up! will you shut up?

Merlin: oh, now we see the violence inherent in the system

Arthur, throwing things at him: shut up!

Merlin, ducking: come and see the violence inherent in the system!

Servants walking past: 😳

People who know how Arthur and Merlin are, shaking their heads: 🙄

Arthur, chasing Merlin around the throne room: MERlin!

Merlin: help! help! I’m being repressed!

Arthur, rolling his eyes and walking away: shut up MERlin

Merlin, looking around: oh, what a giveaway. Did you hear that? That’s what I’m on about. Did you see him repressing me? You saw it didn’t you.

[albion-93]

Riddler: Who approaches the Bridge of Death must answer me these questions three, ere the other side ye see. What is your name?

Batman: It’s Batman.

Riddler: What is your quest?

Batman: To save Gotham from crime.

Riddler: What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?

Batman: What do you mean, an African or European swallow?

Riddler: Huh? I don’t know that.

[incorrect-anything-quotes]

Prince John: I am your king.

Little John: Well, I didn't vote for you.