#introspective anon

[wormchamp72]

Quick where do you see yourself in 5 years

Five years? Ahhhh...Where do I begin?

Known for being consistently on the Slitherio leaderboard.

A beloved member of the Creepypasta Tumblr community.

A famous writer (of Creepypastas and original fiction alike).

Perhaps...perhaps this worm will branch out a bit. Have a circle of likeminded friends. Perhaps even one friend in particular....*shudders* no. I can't let myself think that way. Especially not given Maximus'....current state. Oh no...now my thoughts are racing...is he okay? Is he alive? Can he ever forgive me? Oh god...*breathes heavily* I can't bear 2 think....

If things have gone as wrong as I believe they have, in five years, I will still be repenting....

Maybe I'll dye my hair black. If mother lets me. Though I doubt she would be against the prospect.

Ha...maybe this worm will be looking for love...if there ever could be someone who matches my wits and can comprehend my dark mind....

Thank you, Anon, for such an introspective ask. You have given me much 2 contemplate.

Peace and love,

Wormchamp72

[genericpuff]

Why is the art so unappealing in lore Olympus now Persephone looks like a highlighter and maybe it’s just me but the proportions like the fingers in arms are soul over the place I don’t think they used to be this bad. Am I just looking at it with nostalgia or am I crazy ?

Honestly, nostalgia does play a huge part in it, even to this day there are times I look back on old S1 panels and go-

Actually here's a great example that literally just happened yesterday in the ULO Discord that nearly had me on the floor LOL This is from Episode 70:

Like I didn't even believe that that was real until I was told what episode it was from and I was just. Astounded and flabbergasted. The over-shading of the blanket that just makes it look like a really bad edit. Insane.

And yeah, there are a lot of old panels that hit different now that the rose-colored glasses have been removed, crushed, and thrown into the trash compactor.

I think that's why it makes it all the more amusing when people come into my inbox and ask me "wait, why did you like LO to begin with?? It's always been ugly as shit, I think you're just romanticizing it" because like... there's something to be said about art and subjectivity, even if something is ugly to one person doesn't mean it isn't beautiful to someone else. It's why I try not to be too mean towards the fans of this comic for still enjoying it, because while I definitely have strong opinions about how "LO has gotten worse" and what kind of following Rachel has cultivated (cough cough), there are also just as equally valid arguments that LO has never begin good to begin with that I can't necessarily disagree with now that I'm looking back on it with a more critical eye.

That said, there's tons of media that I enjoy that is objectively awful. Like y'all, you don't need to take my opinions about a dumb pink x blue fantasy romance comic seriously, I like Starfox Adventures-

Like yeah it's a badly made rushed piece of shit that was developed right on the ass end of Rare's glory days and was really an original IP (Dinosaur Planet) that got Frankenstein'd into a Starfox game so it could "sell better" for Nintendo, but I don't give a fuck, I love Starfox Adventures and some day I wanna be in the top 10 speedrunner leaderboards for it, which I know doesn't mean much because no one is speedrunning Starfox, but I do and no one can take that away from me dammit-

Anyways. Lore Olympus has, in many regards, always had "bad art". But "bad art" can and should still be enjoyed by those who find joy in it.

And in LO's case, the world it existed in when it launched was a lot smaller than it is now - more specifically, the world of Webtoons. We can look back and see how 'bad' LO looks and reads now because there are genuinely way better comics surrounding it. It was unique and refreshing and experimental back then... now it's just "that stupid blue and pink comic for horny teenagers".

In most cases I would consider that "cringing in hindsight" feeling a good thing because normally it means something has grown and that it seeming "bad" in hindsight would mean that it's outgrown itself and moved onto bigger things. But LO has the more unique problem of "its current stuff is shit and it's making us want the old stuff more, even if the old stuff wasn't good either". In that regard, LO is closer to being like Harry Potter. Remember when The Cursed Child came out at the height of Rowling being exposed for being a TERF and even people who liked Harry Potter didn't like The Cursed Child because it was just objectively worse overall (with or without Rowling's bullshit attached)? It made a lot of people go back and re-read / rewatch Harry Potter with a more objective lens and go "wait a minute guys, I think we only adored these books so much because we were 12 when we read them". Often times it's the good memories we have surrounding certain things that make us have the opinion about them that we do.

Of course, LO is definitely not as politically weaponized as Harry Potter is, so that's where that comparison ends. But my point is that LO is definitely in a situation where it's been riding off the same privileges it had back in 2018 - having an 'experimental' art style while also utilizing tropes and characters that were VERY popular at the time (remember that 2017-18 was when Tumblr was at its height of H x P "Hades was a chill accountant guy who wore socks and sandals and didn't cheat on his wife like Zeus did" fantasizing) - and thinks that those same tricks and tropes will still work today.

Because of this, the art in LO really, really hasn't aged well, even the stuff that we look back on fondly. But I think it's the panels that we specifically think of when remembering "old LO" - the ones that stuck in our memories the most - that are the ones that make us miss or just not care about the panels that don't look good (the panels that make people question why we ever liked it to begin with).

We liked it because of how it made us feel to look at panels like these-

Those genuinely wonderful panels that we think back on the most don't exist separately from the bad panels, they exist in spite of them. Even if we can look back on panels like these and pick out problems in the lineart or the proportions or the color travelling outside of the lines, that can't and shouldn't change how those panels made us feel at some point or another. And that's why when people ask me "why were you even into LO in the first place" I don't have any one answer, because I can't fully explain how something made me feel to justify why it's good to someone who can see from the outside - without rose-colored glasses - that it evidently isn't. It's very much a "you had to be there" type of thing.

Unfortunately, nowadays even the 'best' LO panels in S3 still don't come close to what the S1 panels accomplished - because for many of us, the rose-colored glasses are gone, we can't appreciate the good among the bad because we know now how bad it truly is and so the good just feels like wasted attempts at trying to recreate something it can no longer be. It "came back wrong" so to speak.

LO came back just regular. But our journey to resurrecting it changed us to such a degree that even its closest intimacies are now foreign to us. Sorry dude.

This is still probably one of my favorite panels out of the entirety of S3 for being as close to "old LO" as I've seen since S2, and even it feels like a mistake, an accident, how could a panel like this exist in S3 when so much of it is a dumpster fire? It's like a flower growing in the ruins of an apocalyptic wasteland.

But wasn't that always the case? Isn't that 'always' what LO has been, since the very beginning? A poorly cobbled together mess of writing and panels that, every now and then, manages to leave an impression that makes you feel something? Did we ever truly know LO? Or have we just been relying entirely on an idea of it that we've built up in our heads that when it does do exactly what it's evidently always done (even if not made apparent until looking back on it in hindsight) we think it "came back wrong"?

[1nvictus]

hi uncle nigel :)

when r u gonna take adam out

~abby

Hey, darling. I’ll ask him once I figure some shit out and see what’s going on with that Beth bitch. The sweet boy doesn’t deserve anything less than everything I can give.

I fucking hate that I’m asking this, but… brother dearest @hannibalimagines. You’re a therapist. Put your bias and infatuation with Will Graham aside for a bit and advise me. Let’s say I’m hypothetically interested in two people equally, but in different ways. The fuck do I do?

[saint-hymn]

I am on break at work and it shall be around 2:55 pm when this reaches you, so I cannot properly respond as is- though if you truly want a sample of my writing, I’ll see if I can gather some. A long ask ahead for that one, along with some shorter responses, perhaps a chainsaw instead of a scalpel if you want to reach the core.

Also, to the other anons and folks so intrigued by this all- I had no idea I’d garner such an audience to my study! I hope it doesn’t affect the results. Perhaps it should stay on stage for just a bit longer, the anonymity is fun.

To throw on one note of a caw though- I will not correct you but add on: it’s the concept of clay being carved. It does not hurt, it does not weep, but then once you are human you look back and see that would’ve hurt if I were different. I am different. Does it hurt? Despite the fact that there is no wound at all.

—studying anon (or whatever nickname, I accept all. See you soon!)

it would've hurt. Now, here, we're beholding each brushstroke of the knife-that-was and questioning the absence of pain then that would have been something if we were what we are now. I'm understanding the steps to this dance.

Hello again! Then, by the time I've answered the ask it should be... 8:30 AM-ish for you? I feel like a backstage worker that's gotten yanked to the limelights. Know now that I am only the scribe, Apollo, typewriter and painter but never the figure never the muse. Pardon my dust.

If anything, you're gaining novel data by putting me in an entirely new environment. I've only ever written for two-three pairs of eyes, never an audience, never this open, never splayed in a game and a dance I'm new to. It's a welcome change of pace! Please, I'll put the obsidian down and get a Husqvarna running for you.

Here, something for you, again, for the sake of wanting to hear your thoughts: what do you think about self-martyrization to empty seats, blood spilling for an empty altar—unhearing god? There is no salvation offered through a self-imposed suffering. Messiah to none. Holding onto the hurt thinking there is virtue in the red. The cage is open. Walk out. There's naught left, so why insist on holding onto it? Suffering framed as a masterpiece but it bored everyone to death.

[blairdii]

Stop! I’m not the original anon but Carlos losing his hair is killing me! It’s totally shallow but our world can be shallow sometimes! Here he is a new relationship and he’s physically (and probably mentally) falling apart and he just wants to be at his best. I can almost see him being apologetic when he sees old pictures or edits of him and saying to Oscar sorry you didn’t get that version of me which of course is ridiculous to Oscar.

Also kinda can see Oscar being the boyfriend that shaves his head just to make Carlos smile? Maybe the entire grid follows in support? Who knows now I’m going off the rails lol

"I can almost see him being apologetic when he sees old pictures or edits of him and saying to Oscar sorry you didn’t get that version of me which of course is ridiculous to Oscar."

ahhhhh this part killed me, because i totally see carlos doing this. to the point where they have an argument over it so intensely, they go no contact for days.

oscar would be more hurt than anything, wondering why carlos would think of him that way, that all the hours, days, he's spent with him during chemo whenever he's free, could be rectified by the fact that carlos doesn't look as good as he used to.

and he would tell carlos all of that, in a fit of tears, that whatever version of carlos he gets, he'll take. he'll take and cherish it all.

about oscar shaving his head in support, i absolutely see him wanting to do so, and he even recruits others on the grid too. but when carlos catches wind of his plans he would be immediately against it. and at first, oscar would think he's pissed off carlos again, but i think i'd make carlos more opposed to it due to the fact that it'll serve as a constant reminder of the fact that theirs would grow back, and what are the chances that his would? again, it may be shallow, but i do want to cover the topic of how humanity is ever so transient, and the hopelessness carlos feels when he realises this.

perhaps i would use the hair as a motif to represent that; less of the aesthetic loss, and more of missing the life he once had (racing in particular)

[diyasgarden]

what are some of your personal beliefs or views of yours changed over time & why? if it’s okay to ask

I don’t think there was ever a particular time that you could call me deeply devout, but when i was younger i did have a stronger sense of fate in a higher power than i do now. i guess you could call me agnostic or atheist. although as a whole i find these terms arbitrary, because i don’t view this as a loss of faith but as a displacement of it.

I find beauty and holiness in the people i come across each day, and this is now religious. The belief I could put in god, exists for humanity as a whole. I’m devout for smiles and laughter. Pious for love and any act of kindness, big or small. The list goes on and on.

This isn’t me saying all humans are good, that isn’t my goal. We all know that isn’t true, now more than ever. But really I think we all can be good. That is where my faith now lies.

[mxtxfanatic]

i truly cannot understand why ppl are having trouble with such a simple concept, no ppl are not villains or evil for seeking proportional justice against ppl who caused harm for no reason but bc they enjoy hurting others, ppl are evil and villains when they have no excuses that justify their crimes other than getting satisfaction from hurting ppl, yes being inconsiderate of how your pursuit of justice can harm innocent bystanders makes you an idiot who should get punched but it’s in no way similar to hunting ppl for sport bc it makes you feel good

Because the “nuance” villain stans want isn’t this ^^^ but the “nuance” that allows them to twist the meaning of morality any which way to finagle morally reprehensible shit like rape, mass murder, and ethnic cleansing into the “moral” category. It’s not that they can’t understand the very basic idea that two different actions are not the same thing just because they lead to a conclusion that shares 1% similarities with each other, it’s that they don’t want to because they can’t accept that they just, completely unironically, like a terrible character and his terrible actions.

[makeste]

How do you feel about certain events which may have happened in a really really recent chapter of Japanese sky high with a hint of Naruto in it in which our main character is a green boi

I'm only partially spoiled because I was only trying to keep tabs on the major stuff, so I would still have something to react to when I catch up again. so I feel like I'm not really qualified to give an opinion just yet, because there's a lot of nuance and buildup and context I'm probably still missing. I will say that in hindsight I'm glad I'll get to read the for-reals final battle binge-style rather than week-to-week, both because I think it'll read better that way, and because if I'm being fully honest, the one thing I don't miss about doing weekly reads is weighing in on each new story controversy of the week. XD

granted I will admit this is a particularly spicy controversy lol. and not necessarily what I was hoping for, BUT at the end of the day it's Horikoshi's story and he can do what he wants. and if this really is The End For Real, it's nothing a few fix-it AUs can't handle if it comes to that. I do want to wait and see what the next few chapters hold before I give it an official star rating or anything like that, though, because I feel like there's still a lot of stuff that hasn't been fully resolved and/or addressed. so I'm withholding all final judgments for at least a few more weeks.

[frnkiebby]

you should do frank covered in blood like he's leaving the senate because it's stab say

Oh anon. my sweet baby angel anon. bloody frank??? is my fucking fave. Joyriding? Joyriding???

definitely search my blog for ‘bloody frank’ and you’ll have a PLETHORA of bloody frimages.

but bc i love him and your ask sm you’re gonna fucking get some bloody frank.~🎃

edit: i just reread your anon. i am dumb and just woke up. regardless. bloody frank. happy stab day.

[phightingconfessions]

i HATE how obsessed i become with the ships to the point where it's hard for me to perceive the characters individually outside of their ships

rocket had a horrible traumatic past and all im thinking about is how cute he'd be with sword

im not one 2 preach bc i sometimes also get too into ships and focus on those but i promise u anon..... try yr bestest to get out of that bc the characters are SOOOO interesting.... shipping however is also an interesting way to look into their characters on occasion, like rarepairs especially can be a fun exercise in how x would interact with y

[stupidiinspades]

And what if Jesus asks if you spit or swallow… pomegranate seeds (obviously)? 🤨

There's something he's noticed, about all these tales and films about Christ's life and crucifixion that always had managed to stick in his craw; his tongue worrying it like a seed stuck in his teeth that just won't leave no matter how many times he flossed at it.

Their romanticism frequently flirted with the erotic.

They touch Him; reverent yes, but hungry. Desperate- longing- they weep when His hands lay upon them, and others seem unable to GET ENOUGH. It is a famine for which there is no cure save He, and daft sods they are, they don't realise they already have Him- that He, as He says, is always with them.

Intrusive thoughts are crawling along the backs of his eyes tonight; John having been sudden possessed by the compulsion to watch The Passion of the Christ after departing Yeshua's company. Chas said it was the gnarliest portrayal he'd seen. So why not, eh? What better, to try and understand the mortal mental machination of the Almighty than a marathon focusing upon His sermons and sacrifice.

'What if He told you to devour that fruit of PASSION? Would you follow the command of the Lord in this?'

There's something to be said for mankind's yearning for the divine. Be it to BECOME, or to be SAVED BY it. Sometimes it flies by 'skirting blasphemous' and careens utterly starkers into 'plunging one's rod into the celestial honey vat to give it a stir'. They devour sacrifice as if it were choice cuts, wrapping themselves in the warmth of the fire set at the foot of their martyrs.

Constantine exhales, eyes the fruit in his hand plucked from the bowl, and begins to score the top.

John's one of those cocked ones. Those that equate suffering to love, and blood to romanticism. Seventy years on this marble peeking behind celestial curtains like a naughty schoolboy, and the statement 'I want to skin you with my teeth' makes his chest heat- for gods and devils and spirits communicate in many ways-- but the one they all agree on, is HUNGER.

God be merciful, was he ever hungry.

Pomegranates had a few health benefits- and the niggling, intrusive hypothetical bounces around like an unwanted dog as he removed the top- blade trembling only faintly as it slides between the white flesh: the exorcist doing his damndest to ignore what screams down his nape to settle at the middle of his spine.

Spit the seeds? Or swallow them?

Jesus spoke in parables. In metaphors. Led one to the lesson at hand but did not force a revelation. He was an invitation to self-betterment through reflection of events undone. Through ephemeral vague query and direction, He taught the masses.

And John now can't help but think of the fruit's aphrodisiac benefits, the anti-cancer studies, the cardiovascular health boosts, and the ghost sensation of Yeshua's fingers along his jaw - the Man an ever-physically affectionate one - and wonders just what the absolute fuck it all meant.

Or if he was REALLY going to hell after the mental image comes of the Messiah placing a seed upon his tongue.

Spit? Or swallow? --- "Christ help me..."

[arithegreat-666]

Welcome to my blog I’m a digital and traditional artist who loves:

Cult of the lamb

Baldurs gate

Chainsaw man

Ranma 1/2

Sailor moon

And plenty of others I can’t name off the top of my head. I’m 18 and use they/them and if you’re a mutual

Hello :3

I do not welcome bigotry of any kind and if you’re willing to share opinions do so respectfully

I do some OC work here and there I will link the post here at some point where it describes the story and idea but for now welcome to casual posting with some odd weblogs here and there

[agardenofbasil]

yeah, the injury against athletic was probably the hardest one to witness as a fan (and i am sure even harder if you actually know him) because he even said afterwards that it was tears of helplessness and because he felt like all the hard work he had put in was for nothing because it was the same leg that he had already gotten injured in at the start of last year's season

https://www.tumblr.com/pedripics/744033969498112000/volver%C3%A1s-m%C3%A1s-fuerte-mago?source=share

he was completely devastated. so seeing unai (and everyone else) caring so much for him was very sweet. and also obviously knowing how much they tried to cheer him up after he got injured at the euros (knowing how hard his season had already been).

one detail that always stuck with me was in his post after the injury, he said that 'tears of helplessness will soon be tears of happiness again' and i find it very comforting that not only did that happen with him winning the euros but also winning it with the people (like unai) who were there during the tears of helplessness as well ❤️

God. These videos are fucking heartbreaking. He has every right to be distressed and in tears because I can't even imagine how helpless he felt in that moment. I mean, you train and recover and do everything you're supposed to, and then you get injured again, same limb. How does someone not spiral over that? Pedri's such a resilient person to endure so much pain while also being honest and open about those moments. 

The whole "tears of helplessness will be tears of happiness" has me in tears, he's referencing his own previous pain. The body doesn't forget. It always remembers. 

Pedri's so loved! I wouldn't be surprised at all to know that everyone was treating him so gently and kindly through his recoveries because he's done the same for so many others. And you're right, that is so very comforting because that means he has people who have seen him at his worst and his best, and that's what true friendship is. 

[apollos-boyfriend]

Idk what dh series is so I am gonna assume it is darble hornets the prequel to marble hornets

[deedis]

DEEDIS I DIDNT KNOW YOU COULD DRAW???????

LOLLLLL THANK YKU….. for thinking i can draw…… ifl i get this a lot i tink 💭 its bc i post incredibly infrequently. dont really tag my posts well. dont srb that much. frequently private old art. and dont even have my art tag on my pinned so what ends up happenjng is i kind of just post and dip and if you see it you see jt 🐈‍⬛the only thing that stops me from posting muting and never looking back is the sweet tags people leave sometimes I LOVE YOU GUYSES!!!!!!!

[scribbledghost]

Ghooooooost what are your thoughts on Damocles?

My thoughts can be split into two parts here: one as a fan who loves the music, and one as a fellow creative who shares their art with people.

The first part: it's a banger. Vessel never misses, I love it. I tend to gravitate towards Sleep Token's more "alt rock" or lighter songs, so this scratches my brain in the best way. I've had it on repeat since it dropped. I saw someone say II beat those drums like they owe him money, and I agree lmao. I love it.

The second part: it hits close to home. Granted, Vessel sharing his art in the form of millions of monthly listeners on Spotify and sold-out arena tours is vastly different than me sharing my art in the form of a tumblr writing blog. But the core feelings and worries can be the same.

There's the feeling of "who am I without this". I write, that's what I do. It's what I've done since I was a small child - i tell stories. I didn't start sharing them until 2020, but I've been a writer my entire life. Sure, it can be a pain and it can be stressful. But I genuinely don't know who I am without it.

Then there are the worries. The worry that what I do now isn't as good as what came before - i frequently worry even my newer Inhuman!Vessels content isnt as good as my earlier works for this au. I worry that my writings for Sleep Token arent as good as my writings for, say, Call of Duty or any of the Pedro Pascal characters. (And this isn't to say I won't write for either of those fandoms again. I'm sure I will. But even then, will those works be as good as the old ones?)

There's the worry that the "chords are boring". The worry that the river's run dry and the curtains are called. The worry that the empire's fallen and I've been forgotten.

So... yeah. Damocles hits a little different for me.