#is this another 'joke'😨

[callilouv]

[mod: ehe] love? -cyno

yes bb :D?

[witchinatree]

i'm redoing my intro post so, called it i guess

hi!! my names fen (like fennec foxes) (theyre my absolute favorite animal why are they so ears) (i know why theyre so ears) i'm asexual, aromantic, and a lesbian!! (HELP.) i use they/them pronouns, i say i'm agender because it makes the most sense with how i feel but sometimes i am also like girlhood :]

my main interests are the magnus archives & protocol, dead boy detectives, percy jackson (tv and book series), good omens, sweet tooth, the umbrella academy, heartstopper, witch's heart, & YTTD

baking/cooking is my main hobby and please recommend me recipes or ask for recommendations because i will never stop talking

and yeah! i love the hellsite dearly and i need more mutuals please 🥺

[nightmare8-420]

god why dont i feel like a human

[thephant0menace]

| Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley head cannons

Being in a relationship with Ghost

Warnings: fem!reader x Simon Riley, strong language, fluff, slightly suggestive and mentions of sex, mention of blood and wounds, lots of pet names, simons awful dad jokes😨

Simon is a very intimate and physical lover.

He loves touching you and will always want to be close and affectionate with you, as he didn’t get that kinda physical affection as a kid.

He’s not big on PDA but as soon as you guys walk through the front door of your house, he’s all over you.

He’s absolutely terrified of accidentally hurting you like his father use to do to his mother.

So when you first started dating he was so cautious and gentle with you.

He was scared he’d break you.

But eventually he got more confident and comfortable with you…thanks to all your late night counselling sessions together on random nights. 

He never tells you about his injuries after returning from missions, so you’ll randomly find wounds on his body through out the night.

It’s an effort to get him to let you patch him up and be acts all tough as he doesn’t want to worry you.

“Just let me patch you up…it’ll be quick!”

“It’s fine, darlin’.”

“Simon, you’ve got a huge slash up your arm…”

“I’m alright. Let’s just go to the bedroom, I missed you.”

“I love you but we are not having sex with your arm sliced open.”

He’d eventually give in after lots of whining and complaining from him.

He hates to admit it but he does like it when you play doctor and sit in his lap, patching him all up.

“Look so pretty in my lap, lovie.”

You just roll your eyes, fighting back a smirk as you clean his wounds.

He loves when you give him back massages after missions and he happily returns them.

Loves when you use all your special essential oils and lotions to massage his sore muscles.

100% has fallen asleep mid massage.

Simon hates spicy food.

But he will suffer through it if you make it for him because he loves it when you cook.

“Simon? Are you alright?” You try to hold back a laugh as you stare at him from across the table.

“Hm? Yeah, yeah, m’fine…” He mumbled out, tears welling up in his eyes as he reluctantly scoops another spoonful of spicy pasta into his mouth.

You raise a brow suspiciously, “you don’t look fine…are you crying?”

“No! No, I’m not. Promise.”

“If you don’t like it you don’t have to have it,” you chuckle.

“I told you, I’m fine. Just a bit of spice…” there are tears practically spilling from his eyes and down his flushed cheeks.

You still tease him about it to this day.

He has also taught you how to make tea like a proper Brit.

He doesn’t believe in water.

This man lives off tea and bourbon. NOTHING ELSE.

He’s super quiet for a big guy.

He’s stealthy 🤨

So sometimes you don’t even hear him approaching and it scares that shit outta you.

He finds it hilarious yet he doesn’t even mean to.

Simon also sneezes so fucking loud.

Like you know those big ass sneezes dads do…yeah like that.

It quite literally makes you jump, every. single. time.

No matter how long you’ve been together…it always gets you.

DAD JOKES! DAD JOKES! DAD JOKES!

“Hey love,” he rasps out, voice croaky from sleep.

“Hm?” You groan, opening your eyes slightly.

“What do you call a soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray? A seasoned Veteran.”

“Simon, it’s 2 am.”

A/N: you guys seem to like my Ghost head cannons, so eat up🫶🫶

Also…more Konig and potentially Price fics coming up next!

[zikkytheblicky]

Hey I wondered if you could do Angel dust x Angel!male reader like his reaction to see a real angel ?

if you want,you can ignore this <3

this anon is so nice omg :( such a sweetheart i’m gonna call them sweet anon :3

anyway, ya ofc!! this might be a lil short cuz im doing this at 10 pm and im tired but ya!! its gonna be story format + headcannoning cuz why not :3 I MADE READER OBLIVIOUS BTW!!

angel dust has never seen an angel. not once, not twice. the only thing he’s ever seen closest to an angel was lucifer morning star but he’s technically a fallen angel.

so when he saw you for the first time he was very shocked- especially since you were so beautiful..

you were talking to Charlie and introducing yourself as one of Adams’ body guards. you were there with Charlie to help determine if Charlie’s idea was even possible.

so obviously, for your charlie’s sake, he was on his best behavior.

you brung your hand up to your lips and let out a laugh as angel cracked jokes to you as he told you stories about his life(?) in hell. “and then- then he-“ angel was laughing so hard he could barely continue- ignoring the knowing smirk husk sent his way. the damn cat. he knows everyone too well. maybe angel should stop venting to him while drunk (not like angel chooses to. his drunken, depressed state during those hours are never in his control.).

angel had ended up getting really confused on your anatomy- questioning how you can fly and why you have a halo over your head- keep in mind this man died in 1947 of an overdose and is in his thirties ☠️ he’s been in hell since 1947 and has NEVER learned about angels at all. the only thing close to angel anatomy he learned is how lucifer has yellow hair and has a kinda angelic color scheme (all angels obviously don’t look alike but angel has never seen another one besides vaggie but he doesn’t know she’s one).

“‘m/n’?” angel asked as his eyes followed the way your feathers twitched every millisecond from the uncomfortable stares at them. “yes?” “why do you have a halo over your head?” “ANGEL.”

angel likes you in a week. A WEEK. he fell so hard im telling you bro. like just one look into your eyes and he’d kill all three of the vees for you if you asked him to.

he surprisingly doesn’t act downbad in front of you. i know people like to think angel is bold and flirty but to me i think that’s just his persona and not his true self. he keeps up a persona so he never gets his trust broken again? maybe? idk. but i js believe he’d be shy and not really know how to flirt with you like he does with husk and alastor and sir pentious; so smoothly and easily.

think about how he had tried to flirt with you before but ended up just becoming a stuttering mess when you took his flirting literally.

“hey toots~ did you fall from heaven?” angel dust said in a seductive tone, grabbing your chin and tilting your face up at him. “huh? no.. i’m not a fallen angel..! are you saying i’m like lucifer?” “HUH WHAT- no- no! not like that at all! i was trying to- to..” angel stuttered his words, waving his hands around (bring careful not to accidentally hit you, of course). “to what?” “to.. just joke around! you’re so oblivious ‘m/n’, im going to punch you.” angel said in an affectionate tone, slinging his arm around your shoulder. “why? what did i do?” you asked politely, too politely. now angel felt bad. angel mentally screams.

sometimes you think angel’s mad at you when he’s playing around with you on text.

he ends up getting mad at himself most times

angel was smashing his head into a table and cursing all the overlords because of this btw.

alr thats enough bye bye!!

this was so rushed omlll. 😨

[sweetteainthesummerx]

THE LOVE LASTS SO LONG (blurb 2)

the wedding bells ring!!

series masterlist

★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★

dior.n.goodjohn posted

dior.n.goodjohn still in shock that the baddest baddie is off the market 😫 congrats to my best friend, partner in crime and the most talented woman on earth

tagged: aubreyyang, alexandrasaintmleux, oliviarodrigo, lilymhe, leahsavajeffries

liked by aubreyyang, olliebearman and 78,112 others

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aubreyyang I LOVE YOU I cant wait to have u as my maid of honour

oliviarodrigo stop the last photo turned out so good!!

olliebearman who's that baddie in the first slide wow

-- dior.n.goodjohn ur so luck that she walks you like a dog

-- user1 BYEEE she clocked him w that one

aubreybearmanxx THE CONTENT WE ARE ABOUT TO RECEIVE

user2 her having the girls but also Ollies little sister in her bridal party is everythingg

dinobeganovic_ posted

dinobeganovic_ letting the man have one more wild night (we knocked Oscar into the ocean) before being tied down forever (we confiscated his phone because he kept trying to text Aubrey)

liked by charles_leclerc, arthurleclerc and 56,384 others

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aubreyyang my mans devoted what can I say 😘

-- olliebearman love you babe

-- landonorris can't believe their letting kids get married

-- olliebearman ur like 5 years older than me

-- landonorris I said what I said

-- aubreyfanpage22 they went public and now they have no shame 😨

oscarpiastri anything for my brothers big night

-- user3 girl the f1 friend group is another level

user4 OH THEYRE ALL SO FINEEE

lilymhe posted

lilymhe big day for my best girl

Aubrey, the first time I met you, you were 17 and out of your first relationship. It pained me to see someone who held so much love in their heart to be hurt. Now, 6 year later you've found the man of your dreams who treats you like a queen. I'm the proudest big sister 🤍

tagged: aubreyyang, alexandrasaintmleux, oliviarodrigo, dior.n.goodjohn, leahsavajeffries

liked by i.am.charliebushnell, dallasliu and 83,002 others

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user4 im crying sm they're perfect for each other the haters can shut up

morganfreeman my little girl is all grown

-- aubreyyang MORGAN THANK YOU FOR COMING

aubreyyang lily ilysm words cant describe how grateful I am for your wisdom and company its helped my relationship so much

alexalbon our daughters so old

-- user5 this is so wholesome

--pastryboii33 ever since Oscar made that joke the grid has become an interconnected weave of familial ties

aubreyyang & olliebearman posted

aubreyyang & olliebearman mr. and mrs. bearman

liked by mckennagraceful, zendaya and 201,998 others

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user6 OH THEYRE SO BEAUTIFUL

aubreyyangfan1 the real ones know the soft launching days

user7 aren't they kinda young

-- olliebearmancontectts they're 24 and 26 so no not really

lewishamilton congrats!

terribearman welcome to the family!

-- aubreyyang ty mama bearman xx

user8 just watched their wedding video AND I SOBBED

aubreyyang posted

aubreyyang got married to the loml, anyways how was your weekend?

tagged: olliebearman

liked by walkerscobell, lilymhe and 99,923 others

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user9 ABSOLUTE ICON

f1tracks00 the sheer amount of fame at this wedding

-- user10 who was there

-- f1tracks the whole grid, aubreys current and past costars (Morgan freeman, Michelle Yeoh, dallas liu, Mckenna grace, the whole Percy jackson cast) and like hella celebrities

charles_leclerc shoutout to LEC for catering the dessert

-- alexandrasaintmleux babe not the smalls promotion rn

alexandrasaintmelux the most beautiful bride

olliebearman posted

olliebearman my beautiful bride

tagged: aubreyyang

liked by scuderiaferrari, oscarpiastri and 92,105 others

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scuderiaferrari congrats to the prince and princess of Ferrari!

-- user11 wow she is so ethereal

-- olliebearman ikr

-- user11 BYE WHAT R U DOING HERE

aubreyyang my handsome groom

ollieyangg92 the way ollie was crying when she was walking down the aisle

-- user12 AND THEIR VOWS LOVE REALLY EXISTS

★・・・・★・・・・ ★・・・・★

Taglist: @callsignwidow @iloveyou3000morgan @honethatty12 @taygrls @destinyg237 @ilivbullyingjeongin @eiaaasamantha @1uvsptnik @yla-aira @ririyulife

© sweetteainthesummerx.tumblr. all rights reserved. unauthorized copying, translation, or claiming of my writing or any works as your own is strictly prohibited.

[cursedcatchild]

Ok, so I watched TOTTMNT and I am here to rant. Also, SPOILERS ahead!

So First of all, if I had to sum up my thoughts into a single sentence it would be: For the love of God, put those turtles back together, where they belong!!

I didn’t hate the show, but I didn’t come to like it either. And no, I did not have any prejudgment just because it was a new iteration. Honestly I was super hyped for this version, because the movie was a blast. Yea, I ended up being disappointed. But let me just elaborate on that:

First let’s take a look at our turtles from worst to best in my opinion.

Mikey:

Yepp, ladies and gentlemen so far I have never seen a single iteration where I didn’t come to like a Mikey. He’s always among my favs. But this version felt super shallow. He had just as much screen time in the series as his brothers and yet I still have no idea who this guy really is. His jokes were lame not really landing, I couldn’t really point out any particular goal or insecurity that anyone could relate to. Also, the guy is super oblivious. Like he took ten minutes to realize he walked into a robbery when he went for groceries. Heck he was having a casual conversation with the robbers. 

Leo: 

Another kinda shallow guy. Sure we seen a bit of insecurity, he literally quoted Rise Leo saying “ I’m nothing without them!” but it felt irreal. Because Rise Leo had a reason to think that, he wasn’t as much of a functional member of the team and he was always taken for jokes. But right from the beginning of TOTTMNT we see Tales Leo commanding his brothers, they listen to him  and even say it multiple times how planning is Leo’s thing. So at this point this Leo is just fucking blind. ( Also April slaps instant self confidence into the boy.) 

Raph:

Ok, this is also the first time, but I never really took a liking to a Raph before Tales Raph. Boy is filled with anger and sass, yet he’s not coming off as a total jerk like 2012 Raph. And of course he's not a super softie like Rise Raph ( I don’t hate Rise Raph for being a softie, he's my second favorite Raph) either. He had some fun pipe up and overall a personality I got. I think he’s the most perfect Raph I have ever seen. 

Donnie:

The best character of the iteration in my humble opinion. He was relatable, funny, honestly he was stealing Mikey’s job as the comic relief, but at the same time he’s the smart guy. The boy is ranting about not being the IT guy and then goes reprogramming an evil robot. Oh and he saved so many lifes, because he stopped a fucking train crash. He’s epic, I swear.

(My fave screenshot ever 🤣🤣)

Now story wise:

🔥What the fuck was this dumpster fire?! 🔥Who thought splitting up the turtles would be fine?! 😑Especially in a 12 episode season? Look, I don't mind solo or duo time. There were plenty of good ones, for example Rise. I adored the Mikey vs Leo cook off episode or the Gumbus one, but for the sake of my sanity Rise had twice as many episodes and the turtles were not split up for the majority of the story.

Like I'm not joking when I say they were together in 4 episodes intotal.😨😨

Now I heard rumors left and right that the fact that they need to make a show was thrown at the team at the last minute ( IDK how true is that) , but goodness gracious even if I was presented with the task with a “ Due tomorrow label” I could still write a better story. Especially with the goldmine what the writers decided to ignore.

Yes, something that would've made TOTTMNT be really unique….. School people! We were promised that we will explore the turtles from the teenage side. Ummm….Hate to break it to ya all but I think there is no better way to do that than putting them into school.

It would’ve been fire to see them trying to fit in, balancing all the cool hero stuff with school life, maybe wrecking the school, seeing how other teenangers adjust to the fact that now giant talking turtles are their classmates. It wouldn’t be some crazy mind blowing plot, but I swear it would've been amazing.

Now don’t misunderstand me. Despite the story feeling like being all over the place it wasn’t that super bad, but I’m pissed that it could've been better with ease.

Also another thing that bugged me, is the feeling of something missing. IDK if anyone else who watched it felt like this, but I legit felt like if we just grabbed the for example farm arc from 2012 TMNT and aired it as season 1. The fact that the turtles were split and they kept mentioning that they have always been fighting together made me feel like I should’ve seen them do that.

Anyways, If I did not take your will to watch it away, go and check it out. It's not horrible but not great either. I’m disappointed and I'm gonna need Rise back, thank you very much!

[the-moon-files]

The Chain being Down Bad🐕‍🦺™️ for Your Voice lol (Masc!Reader)

(Content under ✄----- )

@peepthatbish once again, our lovely muse peep (name twins!!) Has come to bless me, and hopefully i did that gorgeous idea justice, and dw im not done writing them all out yet :)

<333

Sun: Masculine Reader (he/him)

Orbit: Headcanons-ish

Stars: a dash of everybody <3

(except rare ones like Fierce/Koridai/Courage/Sage/etc.)

☆

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: fluff & Trigger Warnings: none known.

Please comment if i missed any. /gen

Ok but like

Ur voice is absolutely iconic to them

(Like the fairy fountain theme or the appearance of the Master sword, its unimaginable to them for your to not sound like that)

And its not only the heroes of Hyrule, but anyone else who could hear you

Well it helps that it used to be ur only sort of external sign of presence to outsiders

(the Links could also somewhat "feel" you in their own chests sometimes, like when u were stressed over a boss, or sad over a cutscene)

The only others who usually hear you are mostly things like the Great Fairies, the Deku Tree, other weird ass beings that know way too much (Fierce Deity)

So needless to say, when u first crash landed thru a portal into Wild's Hyrule (ur latest Zelda game you've played u guess thats why)

And the Chain had seen u in the distance, met up with you to try and help what they thought was some poor guy who accidentally fell thru Hylia's portals

But as they heard u stutter thru an introduction, instead they knew immediately it was you

Sky and Twi seriously teared up, Hyrule/Wild/Four/Wind all attacked you with a hug and excited shrieking, Legend and Wars were just gaping in shock, and Time was just staring at you

It took you a minute to pinpoint who was from what game, but as soon as you figured it out u literally jaw dropped at Time/Wild/Twi/etc.

(The ones that look different from their in game model or way better irl than graphics could ever capture)

U also may have screamed. A very manly scream. Not high pitched at all. You didnt make Legend cover his ears or the four that tackled u scramble off in fear, what- haha

(U cant blame urself, u were in literal shock, bc that's ALL the LINKS??!! Like u needed a shock blanket like rescue/ambulances gives ppl)

After calming down, it wasnt even an outright discussion or decision u could rlly choose,

They were basically kidnapping u along for the ride, also u were there for them (in pretty voice alone but still) for all their adventures,

So u even suggesting leaving u behind bc u couldnt keep up as well as them had them looking at you like they never even considered it

(And also making them individually go thru the 5 stages of grief: 😨😟😡😭🥺🙏🙏 they were all outright begging u, in their own ways, deadass by the end of it)

So as u travel, you get to understand the full impact of Your Voice, or the Guide's Voice™️.

If anyone has a nightmare, what would normally take another hero poking them with a stick and dodging the reflex punch, or them waking up unable to go back to sleep after having the nightmare, etc.

U quickly realized only took you talking to comfort them, with no reflex punch when they woke up, if they woke up, sometimes u were so good at it the nightmare just cleared ended according to their face

In your first battle against the shadow, along with lots of black-blooded monsters, u realized how much more confidently every Link fought as soon as you were speaking from behind them

They got even better and less stressed abt fighting when u managed to crack a few jokes or go toe to toe verbally with the Shadow lol

Legend outright guffawed when you pulled a dumb "sigh... well i guess... maybe... ur mom." joke in response to his villain monologue, like wiping a tear and everything, saying "u used to say that all the time after dumb long evil speeches, its a fucking classic" 💀

Literally will have them asking you to make more jokes bc it makes them feel better in tense situations/battles (most to least frequently: Sky, Wild, Hyrule, Wind, Twi, Time, Wars, Legend, Four) but they love it equally

Okay but,

U have Definitely. Sent chills down their spines when u get into lower ranges lol

U dont understand why everyone needs to talk to you so bad first thing in the morning,

or alternatively why they keep wanting you to go on a rant abt ur fav book/tv show/thing either???

U are always the last for story time at the campfire every night, and unlike the others, they refuse to let you take a night off, u have to say smth every night??

It amazes u they like ur voice so much, huh, Wild/Twi/Wars/Four/Hyrule must all be getting a little too close to the fire, theyre faces are looking a little red/pink

(Legend and Time just look rlly pleased/happy to be here, they only ever look a little overheated when u specifically look at them while ur talking/or tell a story abt them, and they usually are always the ones asking u another question to prompt u to keep going forever)

Wars may or may not have a life changing moment he told u abt ur voice on his adventures where Cia was like, "Ah Link... let me get a good look at you..."

Link: 😰🤢🥲

You: "... and girl, I am only looking at your tiddies right now."

If Wars had smth to drink right then he wouldve spit-taked.

It was like the one time he was caught so genuinely off-guard, and u just made him suddenly feel 10x more comfortable facing her, he literally couldnt keep his knight trained composure together, he had to lean on his knees he was crying with laughter

That was the first Cia heard of you too and she literally audibly gasped lmao

It was like all of a sudden Wars and Cia had been in on a joke no one else could hear around them (Shiek/Zelda is confused to this day by that)

And there are countless moments like this from each of their adventures where u did this, u cant help but feel mildly embarassed when u hear it at first

But then seeing how much ur voice and comments meant to them and how happy it made them u can help but want to talk more and more and more

Youve never felt more comfortable talking to this many people in ur entire life,

Bc u can literally see their elf ears twitching cutely when they pick up ur voice

BEST BELIEEEVVEEEE

u arent getting out of singing to them.

Yeah, sorry, theyve heard u sing ur fav songs while gaming too many times, they need to hear u sing irl, Now.

Most of them ignore or sort of passively enjoy bards/musicians on their journeys, but as soon as u so much as hum-

Its like they're all clambering to get closer to hear u, but also not make u aware thats what theyre doing, so they end up just:

Four/Legend/Hyrule trying to hide behind various (upside down) books, behind plants that're not that bushy, or one memorable time, when u sang "Good Old Fashioned Lover Boy" quietly to urself, a bard's tune got close and reminded u of it,

and Four fully threw his hammer on his toes bc he was so shocked/lovestruck, he completely missed the anvil and just threw it at the ground/his feet LMAO

Time and Wars, cheeky strategists they are, immediately fall back behind u wherever u are, so u cant see them, but they can still hear u lol

(Theyre the only ones youve not caught actively listening/straining to come closer to hear u... bc theyre behind u lol)

Wild/Sky/Twi all fully whip their heads around fast enough to crack it, then clumsily try to recover so u wont stop

Wild/Sky just fully accidentally like fall into lakes/ponds trying to stay just out of range or even (they both tried it once, and never again after u got onto them) got on a rooftop

And fell. When u got quieter they tried to get closer and- yep.

(Idiots were fine and smiling when u came to check on them)

Twilight.

Twilight's the worst ngl.

Just fully stares in awe at you until u stop out of embarassment, and has had the audacity multiple times to pop up as Wolfie and just happily listen like you havent also been thru the adventure that literally made him a werewolf

Wind is a cutie, he always joins in, esp when he recognizes the song, and since they can somehow remember the songs u sang while gaming, it will never not be a core memory for you to sing "Drunken Sailor" back to back with "I LOVE YOU HOE" by ODETARI (ft.9lives)

with Wind Waker Link.

You nearly died when you heard him singing the chorus, like literally right after drunken sailor 💀

(Its catchy u got it stuck in ur head from tiktok audios)

(Wind absolutely makes fun of the others for being in love with ur voice, like he'll trick u into ranting abt smth late at night when ur voice is husky or ur just low energy atm, and then from behind you just mouth at the rest of them, sitting looking up at you like ur an angel,

G A Y Y Y Y 🫵🫵🫵 )

☆

Sorry to anyone whose sent in stuff to my mailbox! I promise ill answer u tomorrow!!

Im acc running another blog for a diff fandom and i got busy today :/

BUT THANK U SM AND I LOVE YOU TO ANYONE WHO SENT STUFF IN !! <3333

Like, i would write a fic for u tysm for showing me ur interest bc it feels like tumbleweeds are blowing thru LU fandom when i check the tags 💀

Which isnt awful! I just like hearing feedback from ppl or just talking abt LU and stuff :)

Peace out,

🌙

[lubrumalis]

Hey!! 💗 I’m so curious to know your headcanons on Simon previous dating history and sex life 🙃

Heyyy!!!

okay so essentially this is my entire take on it:

2009 OG ghost:

I can 100% see 2009 OG ghost be celibate considering his personality and unwillingness to participate in sexual activities, who knows tbh, but hes probably either a virgin and doesnt care or a very low body count (though its never mentioned he had a gf of any kind)

being fr rn its the trauma lol

wouldn’t do friends with benefits. too busy

2022/23 reboot ghost

reboot ghost probably has one night stands lets be honest. hes fairly confident in his looks… 194 cm tall big guy which girl doesnt want him

they were all probably one night stands where he needed to blow off some steam from the stress. not necessarily because he is hypersexual!!!!

wouldn’t do too much after care with one night stands. a simple “are you okay? do you need water?” and he leaves

the way he talks is also so smooth like have yall seen the conversations between him and soap😍 straight up professional flirting

obviously emotionally unavailable for a serious long term relationship. i think 2009 simon is much more gentleman and reboot ghost is straight up like the song ‘heartbeat’ by childish gambino😭😭😭 would ghost the girl for a while

wouldn’t be a HORRIBLE boyfriend, imagine the way he banters with soap but just less graphic and more gentle sweet like tone thats how he treats his gf

can take sexual hints easily but is really oblivious to romantic ones. you wanna fuck him???? he can tell by ur voice and like three words. but you wanna hug him tightly in a non military duty terrorist hostage situation where you were emotionally distressed kid???😰😰😨 he cant tell

fwb with him is brutal. its more like “hey can i come back here every 6 months to fuck you once and have a few beers before i leave for another 6 months and possibly never come back because i died in the middle of nowhere?”

probably has never had a serious long term relationship ever in his life :( nevertheless a healthy one. he joined the military at a young age and never thought of romance as his thing

had sexual feelings for other women but never anything like a ‘crush’ yk what i mean?

i can see reboot ghost willingly escalate fwb to a serious relationship, if that person is incredibly caring towards him and likes his jokes😭

he wouldn’t actually admit it at first. itd probably start with something like the two of you screw around, you act strangely caring towards him and he gets scared. but then slowly you are who he comes home to.

[thechaoticplayer]

ALRIGHT I JUST WATCHED THE KRISISIS HARDCORE MINECRAFT STREAM AND

homie nap but it’s not really a homie nap and they just fuck the reader instead <3 no way they can put their beds together like that and expect me to be normal about it

Author's note: the first time I fucking saw the three beds together I was like "ah yes one big bed very normal" and then I get this and I'm like 😨😨 WHY HAVENT I THOUGHT OF THAT- I've never written something like this before so expect me to just suck- It turned out a lot shorter than expected and I apologize 🙏 Summary: what was supposed to be homie nap turned not into a homie nap 😰 will you survive I dont even know fam Contains: FILTH... SMUT... THREE BIG GUYS! THEY GRAB ON MY THIGHS-

Listen, you weren't purposely trying to seduce them. Four damn beds pushed together in one room, squished between Zali and Vanta. These men were big (not that way, but you definitely found out) and took up so much space, you wriggled around a lot.

Then you decided to make a "joke". "Hey, what if we just fucked in this bed instead? I'm not even tired because you big dicks are taking up most of it and its impossible to sleep now," you joke.

Wilson sits up to stare at you. Vanta and Zali prop themselves up on their elbows and there was some sort of silent communication that you didn't hear.

Now, you're on your back, tears streaming down your face as Vanta bullies his way into you, walls stretching to accommodate his large girth. Your legs over his shoulders and hitting that spot just right as Wilson plays with your clit, shushing you and murmuring praises in your ear. Zali is literally french kissing your tits right now, leaving red and purple marks and popping your nipples in his mouth. His tongue swirls around the sensitive bud, and all this pleasure you are feeling makes you see stars.

"Doing so well for us," Zali mumbles, kissing your jaw as you whimper.

"Shit, you feel so good," Vanta growls, hips stuttering as you both near your climax. Your moans get louder and both the healer and hitmen get harder by the second.

"Vanta Vanta," Wilson quickly says, tapping the soldier's shoulder.

Vanta slows his pace and you whine, so close to your climax only to be taken away from you just like that. "What is it?"

"Pull out for a second."

"Wha-"

"I wanna do something, okay?"

They stare at each other for a moment. Ah, another meeting you weren't invited to. Vanta smirks, dragging his cock out slowly and you feel empty. He moves to the side and watches Wilson go straight in between your thighs, eyes twinkling with excitement.

"W-Wilson, what are yo-" a moan cuts you off as Wilson begins eating you out like there was no tomorrow.

"Mm, perfect," Zali purrs, kissing your lips and swallowing your moans. "Doing such a good job, yes you are."

Wilson moans into your pussy, vibrations sending sparks up your spine as you shove his face deeper into you. His tongue laps greedily at your clit, collecting your juices and prodding at your sopping hole. You were close to climaxing, you could feel it coil and twist in your stomach.

"W-Wilson fuck, mm!"

"Looks like Wilson can eat pussy pretty good, huh? what a surprise," Vanta teases from side, pumping his cock up and down at the sight.

"Shut up Vanta," Wilson groans.

"Make her cum," Zali says with a innocent smile. "I want to overstimulated her, just a bit."

"Despicable." Zali laughs at the comment.

Your vision was going blurry and your mind could barely put together a coherent sentence. "W-wha?"

Zali presses a kiss to your forehead. "Don't worry, mon amour, I'm going to make you feel really good."

You clamp around Wilson's tongue and cum hard, your whole body shaking from the orgasm. Wilson sits up, panting, with all sorts of fluid all over his face. Was it sweat? Drool? Cum? Who knows. But you definitely noticed a white stain on his pants.

Zali instantly flips you over on your fours, hand pressing against your abdomen. "Look at this magnificent work of art..." he mumbles and it makes your cheeks flame. He slides his cock between your folds, collecting your wetness before gently making his way into you.

Full again, but overstimulated as shit, you whine loudly, trying to get away. But Zali's hands hold you against him, rocking into your body that made you moan. Vanta sits right in front of you, a devilish smirk on his lips.

"Since Wilson already came and Zali is in the process of it, why don't you suck me off while your at it?"

With a drawn-out moan, you lean down and kitten lick his tip, too impatient to lick every single part, you put his cock in your mouth. He groans at the sensation, bucking up a bit and making even more tears flood your eyes. Not only are you getting it from the back, but the front as well. Vanta face-fucks you, grunting and saying how fucking great your mouth feels.

Zali's shaky breaths tickle your ears as you clamp around his cock. You felt like heaven to him and he wanted you to feel the same. he quickens his pace, skin slapping skin and you moan around Vanta's dick. Wilson's hand went back in between your thighs, the overstimulation too much as you whimper loudly.

"Just a little longer, sweetheart," Wilson mumbles. And just as he says that, Zali unloads himself in you, hair framing his face as he panted.

However, you were still sucking Vanta's girth, his fingers tangled in your hair as you bob up and down. Vanta chuckles at the sight, admiring your pretty face going down on him like that. It gets him close to the edge, and he finally releases, a salty taste in your mouth. You swallow before he says anything, which makes him smile from ear-to-ear.

"Hey Wilson, you haven't gotten to be inside her yet, right?"

The hitman shakes his head.

"Wanna turn?"

You are definitely not going to be able to walk on your own for a while.

[monicahar]

—guide on how to fluster the wanderer in four simple steps!

ever wanted your mean lil gremlin of a lover to blush before your very eyes? well, well, you've come the right person!

gn! reader, crack & fluff, dark humor cuz obv i will never miss a chance to bully scara, gets suggestive at the end cause why not djsjsjdjdj idk what im doing i have 26 drafts collecting dust and this is the first thing i finished 💀 help me

# i. choose the appropriate time to strike.

this is the most essential factor in making your huffy lover get embarrassed and not accidentally behead you in a fit.

(he'd never do such a thing on purpose, atleast.)

failing to follow in accordance to this particular step will certainly lead to unwanted consequences such as;

ignoring you the whole day(😦), blasting you off onto another nation(😨), a slight chance of having your head not intact by the end of the day(😰), no warm huggie wuggies from your pretty boyfie(😫) and the ever-dreaded deprivation of authority over his hat(😱)—you couldn't bear to not wear it for a bare minimum of 10 minutes a day!

but if it all comes to shove and you successfully select the perfect timing to initiate your relentless attack on his pride and ego, you might as well prepare your fragile heart for a blessing of a sight such as reddened cheeks present on his fair face as everything from now will be considered smooth sailing! not that hard now, is it?

“you've been gawking at me for a while. what do you want?” you don't flinch a bit when he abruptly closes the book he was previously reading, turning his head to meet your staring eyes with a bothered glare of his own.

ignoring his rather harsh acknowledgement of your silent yearning for his attention to be woven towards you instead of that book he's holding, you blink to yourself as something hits you. he raises a brow at your silence and the seemingly fleeting moment of enlightenment that crosses your blank expression.

the quietude and solitary peace of the room and its atmosphere along with him not throwing his book at you from staring at him basically the whole time he was engorging himself in the piece literature he's holding strongly suggested he was in a good mood.

a perfect moment to strike arises!

# ii. formulate the right approach.

whether your attack should be mild/teasing or rather heated/steamy—it heavily depends on the situation you've chosen and deemed as the appropriate time to strike.

take note of some his small actions to concur what he's feeling at the moment—is he feeling a tad bit annoyed? is he currently in one his clingy moods? does he look like he wants to murder you? or is he just neutral, awaiting for something to interrupt the usual streak of normalcy and growing boredom in his day?

but right now, in your current time—he was just reading his book before he finally picked up and confronted your lengthened staring burning the side of his face.

so something a bit more on the light teasing side would fit. if you brought up some type of dirty joke right now amidst the very normal and quiet day you both are having, he'd probably stand up, approach you with his light footsteps, and backhandedly slap you across the face for being such a horndog.

(that was a joke, for legal reasons. he's more likely to just squint his eyes at you weirdly and continue on reading his book, resulting into the failure of your plan to see him get embarrassed. game over.)

choosing to be a clever dog just this once, you coordinate your attack to match up along with your reply to his earlier question—barking back with the intention to strike at one of his weak points only open to his lover; his perfected features that make up his beautiful face.

raising a hand to your cheek as to feign shyness from being caught red-handed by staring at him, you let out a hearty giggle to soothe his nerves—his frown immediately dissipating from the sound of your laughter. his last defensive barrier: shattered. shutting your eyes knowingly as you raise a cup of bitter tea to your lips, you already know you've won.

“hehe, my bad. you just look a bit more handsome today.”

“...”

a beat of silence overcomes the short exchange of words.

it might seem light or weak to others, heck, even you see it as a bit pathetic, but to the complete virgin former harbinger, he views it totally differently from how others would have expected.

a small push filled with sincerity and truth is his breaking point a hundred percent of the time.

lifting your eyelids as you place your teacup down, your heart clenches at the sight before you.

# iii. relish in the rare moment of weakness.

soak it all up as much as you can. but don't let greed take over you at the taste of victory.

moments such as these aren't anywhere near common at all. your excitement is nearly overflowing but you have to keep yourself still as to not ruin it for yourself.

you're so used to being shut down and ending in utter failure when trying to pry a positive reaction from him—that you could probably just burst from happiness alone when he finally concedes relents to your teasing.

you'd have to hold yourself down from pouncing on him from the display of sheer cuteness he's currently presenting to you, albeit you were quite annoyed with how he's trying hard to hide the rosy cheeks and ears you adored underneath the shadow of his hat.

why is he wearing his hat inside your shared inn? you don't know.

pushing yourself off from your seat, you quietly approach the man sitting across from you, cautious in your movements as to not startle and scare him away at this small window of vulnerability—already well-informed of his past experiences regarding it.

gently lifting his hat up and discarding it onto a nearby tabletop, he stares at you with wide eyes as you quickly swoop down to peck his forehead, and then down to his lips before pulling away just as hastily.

the caught-off-guard look on his face makes you coo at the sight in the back of your mind.

eyeing his flushed state, you can't help but let out a soft sigh as you seat yourself on his lap, wrapping your hands around him to pull him closer, chests against each other's as he remains stiffened underneath your loving hold.

cute.

“handsome.” you mutter, pressing a chaste kiss to his jaw. “my handsome boy.”

# iv. now, freestyle. 😼

do you want to cut the moment short, play hard to get and leave him wanting for more? or do you want to prolong the playful mood—and quite possibly, lead it into something more?

if you've started something, then you're surely going to finish it, right?

the wanderer, after all—dislikes people when they're all bark and no bite.

“you said that just to tease me, didn't you?” his clammy hands that were suspended in the air for so long out of surprise finally made themselves home to your hips, his hold on it nearly bruising as he desperately tries to calm down his erratic emotions. “always think you're so funny, huh.” he mutters.

“i supposed so, initially. it still held truth in the end though. i like your cute reactions.” you admit with a lop-sided smile, cupping his burning cheek as you slight lean away to look at him wholly. “a very handsome boyfriend, indeed.” you nod in affirmation, making him narrow his eyes.

his blush is now non-existent as he's now back to his normal self, having gained composure as quickly as it left the moment you sat yourself on his lap. he was cute earlier, avoiding your gaze and all that, but this side of him was undoubtedly way more attractive. his exuding confidence always never fails to drive you crazy.

a shiver makes it way down your spine when an all-knowing smirk makes its way to his lips.

“alright then, [name].” he leans back on his chair, his hands not leaving your hips to keep you anchored atop of him, the expanse of his lean body now a lot more visible to you. “what's your next course of action? are you going to stand up and disappoint me? ...or are you going to live up to the hinted suggestions of your less-than-friendly touches just now?”

there it was. that daring gaze of his.

are you going to continue upholding the streak of normalcy you didn't know you were both capable of, or will you give in to your desires?

and then nahida barges in, slaps both of you with an overgrown radish and everyone starts behaving like proper educated adults 🥰 the end.

[fishermanshook]

GANJI GUPTA HEADCANONS.

( batter ) aka GANJI GUPTA.

TW: MY H/C’s 😨 , this layout is giving cheese , grammar and spelling warning

INTRO

Who is Ganji Gupta? And how do you know him? As a friend, a loved one, or as a nobody?

*manor au where they are trapped inside.

꒰wc꒱ 641

GANJI GUPTA, also known as the manor's one and only Batter, acts as a lone wolf. He most likely won’t start conversations and will keep his answers short. Though, it’s just another barrier he puts up out of the need for protection. He doesn’t know who he can confide in here and, in his eyes, everyone seems to be another untrustworthy person out for their wants and needs. That’s all that they are sized down to at the beginning.

GANJI GUPTA struggles with being alone, at least, less than most others. He has experience with the feeling, but everyone caves eventually. He, on the other hand, can withstand it for quite some time.

GANJI GUPTA who, after quite some time, starts to warm up a bit more to the manor inhabitants. Realizing that it’s better not to hold any grudges if you’re going to be stuck here for all eternity.

GANJI GUPTA enjoys the company of others most when they play cricket with him. It doesn’t even matter if they’re good or not, he finds the act endearing and appreciates it more than anyone could imagine.

GANJI GUPTA would need a partner who takes things slow with him. Someone who understands that he (sometimes) has his moments, and will give him the time and space to sort through them. That might mean leaving your side for a while or hitting some cricket balls as far as he possibly can, imagining that all his anger flies away with it.

               ↳ However, there are moments where neither of these things can help him and he needs you instead. Help him to breathe again, and talk him through it instead. Distract his mind from thinking about why he was so upset in the first place. Just, don’t treat him like a child.

GANJI GUPTA who can’t help but feel jealous as you laugh and joke around with the others. There’s a part of him that sometimes wishes he too could enjoy the company of the rest but is too shy to say it. Although, if you happen to pick up on it, grab his hand and pull him into the conversation. He’ll find the flow, eventually.

GANJI GUPTA also hates the pit of spitefulness that pools in the bottom of his stomach when he notices someone else flirting with you. He goes red in the face with his arms crossed and looks furious. The Batter can’t seem to grasp how other people aren’t yet aware of your relationship and is quick to wrap an arm around your waist and come up with some lossy excuse to pull you away elsewhere.

↳ You can't help but whine a bit as the Batter pulls you away. You had a friendly conversation going on with the “Prisoner”, what’s the matter? As you continue your complaining, it dawns on Ganji that, you hadn’t realized he’d been trying to court you the entire time.

GANJI GUPTA will always use his last cricket ball to benefit you in a match. Whether it’s to save you from your third chair or to help prolong your kite, he never hesitates to use it for your sake. He’s gotten some rather harsh comments on it before, but he just ignores them and carries on with his day.

GANJI GUPTA deals with frequent night terrors that wake the both of you up. He’s quick to apologize, brushing it off as if it were nothing. Unfortunately, the tears in his eyes give him away. You don’t ask what they were about, and you probably shouldn’t for now. All he wants is to fall asleep in your embrace with the reminder that you’re here. That you are alive.

note: you thought I was gonna post that painter fic? erm whattttt? why would you ever think that???? that’s so weird what….

fishermanshook — no stealing , translating , plagiarizing or reposting my work on other any other sites + reblogs adored !!

[faithst]

WIPING ZB1’s KISSES OFF

pairing zb1 (ot8) x gn!reader

genre fluff

masterlist<3

— zhang hao

he thought he wasn't giving enough affection ☹️

so he gave you a kiss !

and then you wiped it off and he was like ���🤨’

didn't ask though cause he assumed you unconsciously did that

so he placed another on your forehead 😗

and you wiped it off.. again.

didn't say much to that either and just left you alone 😃😃

he thought he was annoying you 😭

“well.. i’ll be over here if you need my kisses”

— sung hanbin

he always kisses you 🤭

it's a part of his daily routine

so when you wiped off his morning kiss

he was devastated 😰

how was he gonna start his day off good now???

instantly grabs your hands and asks you what's wrong

kisses your knuckles 😳

you didn't say anything and he's already apologizing (even if he didn't do anything)

“whatever i did, i’m sorry.. forgive me?” ☹️

— seok matthew

whenever he arrives home, he kisses you

why? cause he knows you miss him 😙

so when he came home today already puckering his lips

he saw you on your sofa, on your phone so he placed a soft kiss on your cheek 💋

and you wiped it off

"did you miss m- what was that for?"

already pouty 🫢

sits right next to you with crossed arms and a pout

but then you reveal to him that it was a joke and kiss him

he instantly melts 🫠

“unnecessary but you’re cute so it’s okay!”

— shen ricky

ricky isn’t the type to usually give kisses randomly yk

so when it does happen, you take full advantage 👍

but this time, you just wiped it off

he’s slowly blinking, trying to process wtf just happened 😐

“um.. okay?”

he has no idea what to do cause usually he’s the one that makes you flustered

now he’s the one thats flustered 😃

he looked so cute that you just had to give in and pepper him w kisses 🥰

“oh thank god! i thought i lost my rizz!” 😨

— park gunwook

doesn’t have a specific time when he kisses you

he just does ykyk

he’s loves kissing you and absolutely adores your reactions to his kisses 😊

so when you wiped one of them off, his whole world shut down 😔

his life flashed before his eyes

he thinks you’re gonna break up w him ☹️

so he prepares a whole long ass speech on why you should stay in his mind

he just stands there, fiddling with his fingers 🧍

he looks so sad and you couldn’t do that to him

“wait.. how did i fall for that?!”

en garde flashbacks 😭😭

— kim taerae

he’s the type of guy that when he sees you, he gives a kiss 🤭

so he gives them quite often

you just came back from work and taerae instantly goes up to you

boops your nose and places a kiss on it 😚

when you wipe it off, he just gets confused

he’s like: no, you’re not leaving without my kisses!

cups your cheeks and proceeds to kiss your entire face 🫠

you had to force him to stop

“hey! where are you going?? i’m not done!” 😓

— kim gyuvin

while he might be one to touch your face and poke your cheeks alot

i don’t think he kisses them often 😦

so when he does and you wipe it off

he’s FLABBERGASTED 😧

like how dare you wipe off his precious kiss 😤

“two can play that game”

gives you the silent treatment

you sit next to him? he moves to another place

you text him? leaves you on read

it wasn’t until you hugged him and apologised profusely 🙏

instantly melts into your hug and kisses your forehead 🤗

“ill let you off just this once” 🫡

— kim jiwoong

will kiss you at any place and at any time 🫣

he knows you love them so he does it very very very often

when you wipe it off, he doesn’t say anything 😐

just kisses you again

and you wipe it off.. again

“did i do something?” 🙁

genuinely thinks he hurt you

won’t let you go until he knows you’re fine

you say that you are fine and that it was a joke

he doesn’t believe you 😭😭

then he asks for permission to kiss you, it’s cute

“im sorry if i did anything to hurt you, can i kiss you?” 🥰

© keiwook | 2023

[raptorladylover6969]

‼️WARNING TO THE JWCT FANDOM 😨😨‼️

so recently, ive made 2 posts targeting an anonymous certain someone in the fandom, but with new information ive gotten, its clear that the fandom needs to STAY AWAY from this person, esp my fellow minors of the fandom, and NOT INTERACT with them AT ALL. Im speaking about this because ive seen too many of my mootie patooties interacting with her acc, so instead of just dming all one by one im just making a whole post abt it 😼.

Theres an account by the name of xxcherrycherixx, and idk if I’d consider them “well known” but their art of The Handler is pretty popular so yeah ig she’s a bit well known 💀 chile anyway SO, basically she’s an artist and draws stuff for like Ever After High and JWCT, and I didn’t pay much attention to them at first, like , I did think some of their art of The Handler was pretty neat, and they were also a big fan of her, so I thought that was pretty epic, cuz like yayyy someone else who appreciates The Handler!! This is totes epicc!! (UNTIL IT WASNT…)

What happened was I noticed some of their posts about The Handler were very….DESCRIPTIVE, like she’d talk abt stuff that certainly NO ONE NEEDS TO KNOW…like in short, she was down bad, but not down bad as in like a normal amount of down bad, I mean DOWN BAD as in not in like a silly goofy tone, but more so CREEPY. She’d share her creepy ass “fantasies” for the whole world to see when NO ONE WANTS TO SEE THAT. An example post was when she talked about how she “wishes she was a raptor” and it was like innocent at first, until she reblogged the post again going into more detail, talking about how “I wish I was a raptor so I can have an attractive female Handler and when she’s h0rny she’d let me fuck her.” Like this woman is fr fantasizing abt b3ast1ality with The Handler….😨 and I dont care if thats a “joke”, joke or not, its fucking weird, and nasty, and 100% ILLEGAL. The fact she even has these sort of thoughts is disgusting.

To add onto that, they also wrote a smvt fic about The Handler and Panthera. (yeah, THE RAPTOR. THE ANIMAL.)

Another large red flag is the fact that they also draw nsfw art for Ever After High when majority of the characters are MINORS.

And the fact they’re one of those “minors dni” ppl when they literally interact in spaces where minors are GOING TO BE, and minors WILL SEE THEIR POSTS, BECAUSE THEY’RE ENGAGING IN SPACES THAT ARE MAINLY MINOR FILLED.

Even her art of The Handler itself is very “ehhhh..” like okay idc if you draw nsfw of her, she’s a character over the age of 18, theres nothing wrong with it, but when majority of the art is overly sexual, it gives off like bad vibes 😭😭 There is is 1 drawing they have of The Handler lying naked and is like holding 1 of her raptors against her while leaning against another, and like at the time of seeing this drawing, I thought the raptors were just used to censor her like body, BUT GIVEN THE MOST RECENT DISCOVERIES….😨😨😨 (yeaaaahhh….)

And the 1 thing that also pisses me off is the fact their content of her is just overly sexual content. I never saw ONE post of theirs where they just appreciate her as a character, it always has to do with wanting to like, fuck her. And like I do not care if ur like very very down bad for her, like shi I am too, but like, KEEP THOSE THOUGHTS OUT OF PUBLIC SPACES. ESP ONES THAT ARE FILLED WITH ‼️MINORS‼️ LIKE THATS BASIC ETIQUETTE.

Another thing is, they excuse their behaviour because of their hypersexuality, which certainly DOESNT EXCUSE THE WEIRD SHIT THE DO…does it explain their behaviour? Yes, but its NOT A JUSTIFICATION. Hypersexuality shouldn’t excuse the fact you fantasize about an animal fucking a human being, and you proceed to ENJOY said thoughts. Hypersexuality shouldnt excuse the fact that you have a thing for b3ast1ality, which again, is 100% ILLEGAL.

Anyway’s skibidi gang, BLOCK THIS HOE, DO NOT INTERACT WITH THIS HOE, just stay away from this hoe 💀

on a serious note, I do hope that Cherry gets the help she actually needs, because this behaviour isnt “silly” or “goofy” its damaging their brain, and they need professional help. Stay safe ya’ll‼️‼️

[sanest-bsd-delegate]

Helooo, I was wondering if can do headcanons, for dazai's s/o jokeing a with a friend about, jumping of a roof(that sound so wrong 💀), like it has been a very stressful week for the s/o and her friend, so like the friend jokes around saying "[insert readers name here] let's jump from a building" and the reader is just like "sure lol" then walk away holding hands (they didn't actually jump from a building, they just went to a cafe).

(Idk, if I explained that well, english is not my first language)

Swan Dive

Headcanon: "😨" - Dazai Osamu, 2023 Masterlist Please look at the request rules in masterlist before requesting. I think my humour and mental health is broken

ARMED DETECTIVE AGENCY

PORT MAFIA

MASTERLIST

HEADCANONS

Dazai:

"Y/NNNNNNN" Your friend said lazily lying on the couch of your room, as you both were pretty drained after teaching middle school kids that too, before summer breaks. Normally, you had a well paying job with respected pay but you thought it was fun to look after kids. Minus the fact the only vacant job was teaching middle schoolers.

"I think i am unfit for the job" You comment as none of you bothered to move. The middle school kids are just indescribable. And thanks to them, you will totally decide to drop before your first pay.

"But Y/NN think of the MONEY" your friend responded, dramatically raising their hands to hold an invisible check.

"Ughhhh so exhaustedddddddddd" You dramatically replied back, your hands over your heart as you fell down beside her on the sofa. "I think I'll get killed by this heat and kids"

"fr, Y/NNN Lets jump off the building or something"

"Good Idea" You replied, as you mischievously looked at your friend, as the secret conversation between you two continued. You looked insane, but can you really blame it?

You and your friend looked at each other, before linking up your hands, walking outside the room and walk towards the door not before seeing your boyfriend, Dazai Osamu.

😨

WHAT IN THE WORLD DID HE JUST HEAR!??

😨😨😨😨😨😨😨😨

YOU? TAKE A SWAN DOWN THE ROOF!? WITHOUT HIM?

"Oh hi Osamu" You replied, as you gave a kiss on his cheeks, before linking your hand back to your friend as you happily started walking towards the stairs.(which were just behind the door if i say)

NAUR BRO

YOU ARE GONNA SERIOUSLY GO UP??

Dazai has his red alert alarms up now.

Dazai suddenly grabs your arms dragging you away from your friend.

NAH BRO-

HE IS

HE IS SAD!?

"Y/N am I not a good boyfriend?" (Like dazai stawp-)

He holds you tight telling you why you should live here, stay with them, stay with him.

You were confused.

His concerns are growing.

"What are you talking about??"

*insert confused screams*

Dazai look into you eyes, as he holds you close before speaking, "Please dont do it with you friend, do it with me"

"I love to hate you romance here, but it to much hot for my liking so Y/N, I'll be downstairs if you need me, until then I'll order icecream for you" You friend says sweatdroppingly, before moving towards the door, downstairs.

"oh"

WDYM BY OH? WE NEED A FULL PPT ON THAT BABYGIRL BEHAVIOUR-

"Dazai are you alright?" "😨"

"HOW DO YOU EVEN MAKE EMOJIS IRL?" "Says the one who is using acronyms while speaking Y/n"

Nothing better to do, and little weird out by your own lover's weird interaction you make your way down merely.

"this is diablo speaking to weretiger, another atempt unsucssesful, the mission is a success"

Dazai could only stand dumb folded at the corridor, not before merely going upstairs, I mean what's better then trying ways to die to forget past events?

"Oh shit the mummy is going upstairs, I REPEAT ITS GOING UPSTAIRS"

"I can hear you Akutagawa, stop hiding behind the flower vase"

This pic and "😨" are same.

I hereby rename this 😨 emoji as Dazaiface idc.

Sucks if you see 😨 as

[remotepixel]

Hi! Can you write the Avengers with a demon reader? Maybe just a weak and very young demon who is looking for people to sign contracts for their souls

Hii! Thank you for requesting!

While writing this I was honestly just thinking of hazbin hotel, so if I mention 'Hell' I'm talking about that kinda version, not the religiously-accurate one for eternal punitive suffering lol <3

TW: yandere themes

-The Avengers assumed you were a threat the second they heard about a supposed demon running around nyc, asking people for their souls. They’ve dealt with numerous different supernatural beings - aliens, gods, simply superpowered individuals - but this was another level of insanity. I can imagine Steve, the Catholic man he is, just ‘😨’ the second he found out.

-But all that suspense died the second they saw you…a child?

-Obviously, past all the confusion, you’re taken into the Avenger's tower/compound for light questioning. They've got to make sure you’re an actual demon first, just in case they’re kidnapping someone’s kid who decided to dress up early for Halloween. However, when it’s revealed that you really are one, and supposedly have powers, you'd be made to live in the tower with the others - safety and all that (definitely not for the plot).

-Despite being a demon, your age and weakness will be the main factor for their obsession to start. You being young makes it easier for them to justify their overprotectiveness. You need to someone to look after you, teach you, and it only makes sense that they would take up that mantle. Sure, they might not have lessons in parenting (expect Clint) but there isn’t many other superpowered people in the world, and they knew how desperate some people could be to get power. Being young means you’re more likely to ignore any red flags or know the signs of manipulation, and they’re convinced you wouldn’t be able to fight back anyways.

-I don’t think they would actually try and help you with your powers though. Apart from basic self-defence classes, they want to keep you reliant on them for as long as possible. You could likely overpower most of them at full potential, and where would that lead them? Would you forget about them? Ignore their advice and throw yourself into battle like they do? It isn’t worth it.

-If you’re really insistent about it, they may let you mess about a bit. Though, that’s mainly if your powers are unstable/out of control and training is needed. And, again, it would only be enough to keep you safe and remain weaker than them.

-I get the vibe some of them won’t take your title of a demon seriously in general - Steve’s coming to mind first. Like I mentioned, the guy’s religious and, since you probably go against his years-old assumption of a demon, he wouldn’t fully think of you as one, even though it was proved. You’re more of a superpowered, human kid in his eyes.

-Tony would treat it more like an inside joke than a fact. Like, he’d make stupid nicknames about your Hellish bloodline, but he’d ignore any genuine conversations about it. It’s just hard for him to image that you are some ‘fallen, evil angel’….so he doesn’t.

-Natasha wouldn’t be too fussed about it. It’s not that she doesn’t believe you, but your exact species doesn’t matter too much to her - she’ll like you either way. She’ll listen to any fun facts you want to tell her about Hell (assuming you were born and raised there) or demons in general. Clint is in a similar boat. Although he might tease you about it sometimes, Natasha would probably tell him to shush if it went too far and you seemed upset.

-Bruce would be a bit hesitant. Due to how the Hulk affected him (physically and the guilt), I think he may be a bit worried that your ‘evil’ blood would lead to you actually becoming a stereotypical demon later on, even if you try to fight that side of you. But, he’ll likely calm down a bit when he starts getting to know you more, and would lean towards the middle like Natasha and Clint. He’d probably be interested in learning and logging your abilities, both as he’s curious and it’s useful to know if anything goes wrong.

-Thor would be the only genuinely happy one. He’s probably met countless difference species/races on different planets, so you not being human isn’t odd to him - it fact, it just brings you two closer together. If he’s able to, he would probably take you back to the underworld for a day. Of course, he’d forget to tell the others though and lead to an unneeded, frantic search party.

-I wouldn’t put it past at least one of them to sell their soul to you - whether for funzie or they don’t fully believe how bad it could be. Like, if they don’t take you as a demon seriously anyways, they’re not going to take your little contract seriously either.

-I was thinking mostly Tony, due to his habit of speaking before thinking, but Thor would likely do so as well. He’s not necessarily stupid, but Asgard probably has different beliefs, and thus he thinks of your contract as a cultural, non-Midgard thing rather than ‘i’m actually taking your soul’ thing.

-Either way, all of them are planning to stay by your side infinitely, contract or not : )