#it’d be awesome if you checked it out

[fireinmoonshot]

about love | joaquin torres x fem!reader

Pairing: Joaquin Torres x Fem!Reader Summary: Joaquin thinks taking the engagement ring he's bought for you on a mission with him is a good idea – it's definitely safer with him than it is anywhere else, right? Well... until he loses it. Warnings: Mentions of minor injuries (a bump on the head) Word Count: 4k A/N: Had this idea at work yesterday and thought it was so Joaquin so I had to write it. I'm so happy with how it turned out. Thank you for all the love on my Joaquin fics so far – I have more coming for sure, I have so many ideas in a note on my phone, as well as the requests you guys have sent in! 💗

“Woohoo! That was awesome!” Joaquin yells, his feet finally hitting the ground after being airborne for what feels like hours. He misses the feeling of flying already. “Did you see me?” He asks Sam, walking towards him.

Sam has just landed not too far away from him and is already sighing at the sound of Joaquin’s voice. “See what?”

“When I did the thing with the thing! And then I did the other thing and bam! He was falling out of the sky! I saw him land in the water and it did not look like a nice landing!” Joaquin explains, in probably the poorest possible terms.

For a second, Sam just stares at Joaquin. How is this the man that he’s basically picked to be the Falcon to his Cap? “Nothing about what you just said makes sense, bro.”

“Yeah, it does!” Joaquin insists. “I did the thing!”

Sam and Joaquin had been expecting this mission for weeks. Everything pointed towards things turning into a fight, but the location and time had been left to chance and eventually, things had turned out just as they’d expected. They hadn’t expected having to fight over the water, though. Sam was just glad things hadn’t turned out the way that they had the last time they’d fought over the top of the ocean.

“Just… go and get checked out by a medic,” Sam orders – the Air Force had been standing by, ready to help if Sam and Joaquin needed it. They luckily hadn’t. “You almost got hit out there. Don’t forget that I saw that.” 

Joaquin grins to himself as he watches Sam walk off, holding his shield by his side. “Come on, that was awesome, bro! And it was an almost hit – they didn’t even graze me!” 

“Tell that to your girlfriend!” Sam yells in reply.

At the reminder of you, Joaquin pauses. The ring. His hands move to the pocket where he’d placed the ring box before the mission and his heart drops into his stomach when he finds it empty.

“No, no, no, no…” 

Joaquin checks every other pocket in his suit, trying to keep hopeful for as long as possible, but it becomes clear very quickly that the ring box is no longer in his suit or even on his body at all anymore. This was not good… if it fell out during the mission… over the ocean… there was no way he was getting it back. Oh, he's so screwed.

He’d been planning to propose to you for over a month now but it had taken him a while to find the perfect ring. He’d scoured the internet and just about every jewellery shop in the city to find one he knew you’d love. When he and Sam left for the mission, he knew he had to take it with him. There was no other choice. What if his apartment was broken into while he was away and they stole the ring? Or worse, what if you came over to his place to get something of yours that you’d left behind and found it? It’d ruin the surprise.

In hindsight, Joaquin realises that maybe the ring would’ve been safer at home… instead of where it likely is now, sitting on the bottom of the ocean or… swallowed by a whale or something… poor whale…

The excitement at the success of the mission is long gone by the time he trudges his way to the medic, who is waiting to see him. He removes his suit slowly and carefully, all the while hoping that the ring will suddenly appear in one of the pockets, but it never does.

Later, as Joaquin sits in his hotel room, he can’t tear his eyes away from the confirmation email he’d received when he’d ordered your ring. It’d ended up being one he found online, but with a few custom alterations to make it more you. The ring was one of a kind, like he’d intended for it to be, because so were you. It made him even more disappointed that he’d never end up getting to give it to you. And now he had to fork out even more money to find a replacement. He knows nothing would ever live up to the original, even if you loved it.

His phone buzzes in his hands and your contact photo pops up on the screen, one he’d taken of you when you hadn’t been looking at him. He’s quick to accept the call, already feeling comforted by your voice the second you say hello.

“How did it go!?” You ask, voice full of joy. “I saw some footage on the TV. You guys looked so awesome out there. It’ll never get old, seeing you flying in that suit, even if it kinda fills me with dread that something might happen to you.”

Joaquin laughs softly. “Thanks, angel. It was good. We won.”

Just by his short reply you can tell that something is wrong. Even though you’re in an entirely different state and you can’t see his face, the fact that he’d not excitedly recounting every single detail of the battle to you says more than his words ever could.

“Joaquin, what’s wrong?” You’re not one to beat around the bush.

“Huh? Nothing’s wrong, angel. I’m just tired.”

“You’re usually so excited after a successful mission and today you sound the complete opposite. Did something happen?” A thought enters your mind. “Wait, did you get hurt? Are you in the hospital?” He hears shuffling on the other end of the line. “Have they got you hopped up on some kind of painkillers?”

Joaquin can’t help but smile a little. “Angel, stop trying to put your shoes on and pack a bag at the same time. I’m not in the hospital, I’m in my hotel room. And I’m not on any painkillers. The medics checked me after the mission and gave me the all clear.”

You pause. “How did you know I was trying to put my shoes on and pack a bag?”

“Cause I know you, that’s how,” he smiles to himself. “You get the thought in your head that I’m hurt and you’re already looking up flights. I’d be the same way if things were reversed, believe me.”

Back in your apartment, you kick off the one shoe you’d managed to get on and sit back down on the couch. “So why won’t you tell me what’s wrong?”

Joaquin sighs. How can he tell you what’s wrong? That he’s actually devastated cause he lost the ring he was planning on proposing to you with? He can’t. He hates lying, especially when it comes to you, and now he’s being forced to lie to you because of his own mistake.

“I promise nothing is wrong, angel,” Joaquin tries to make his voice sound less sad. “I really am just tired. It takes a lot out of you, fighting in a battle like that. It’s one thing to be flying in a plane but to actually be the one flying… it’s a lot. I’ve still got a lot to get used to. I’m just ready for a solid twelve hour sleep.”

“Oh.” You’re not really convinced but for Joaquin’s sake, you decide to drop it. You can already tell that you’re not going to get anything else out of him. “Well, I suppose I’ll let you get your rest then if you’re that tired. You’re flying home tomorrow, right?”

Joaquin nods. “Yeah, my flight leaves at… four? Six? Something around then. Thank you for calling though, angel. Really. I always love getting to hear your voice before I fall asleep.”

You smile at the way you can audibly hear the happiness in his voice. “Any time, Joaquin. I’ll see you tomorrow, okay? You get a good night sleep and I’ll text you in the morning. I love you.”

“Love you too, angel.”

With that, you end the call and Joaquin groans, letting his phone fall onto the bed and his head back onto the pillow behind him. Instead, though, his head bashes rather hard onto the wall behind the bed. He grunts in pain, a hand going to the back of his head to rub the sore spot. Yeah… that’s gonna leave a bump for sure… he probably deserves it…

It’s a few hours later and Joaquin is finally about to give up on staying awake and finally try and get some sleep when he hears a knock on the door of his room. It takes a tremendous amount of effort to pull himself up from the bed, his whole body aching from the activity of the day. When he pulls open his door, he’s more than surprised to see Sam on the other side.

“Listen, bro, I’m way too tired to have a post-mission debrief and drinks or something, so can we just do this in the morning?” Joaquin asks, already knowing Sam would prefer it.

“That’s not why I’m here,” Sam says. “Can I come in?”

Joaquin stifles a yawn and steps aside to let Sam into the room, closing the door behind him. Sam takes a seat at the small table and chairs over by the window and Joaquin takes the seat opposite him, not wanting to be disrespectful by sitting on the bed like he would much prefer to do – the chairs are not padded and not comfortable in the slightest.

“What’s up, Sam?” Joaquin questions, leaning back against the chair and crossing his arms over his chest. 

Sam shoves a hand into the pocket of his jacket and removes a small blue velvet box and slides it across the table towards Joaquin. He almost jumps out of his seat at the sight of it, instantly snatching it up and opening it. He sighs in relief as he sees the ring, safely inside the box, completely unharmed. 

“Bro, what the hell!?” Any of the exhaustion that was in Joaquin’s body is gone as he looks across the table at Sam. “Did you send someone to retrieve this or something? A dive team? How did you even know that I’d lost it?”

Sam smiles a little at the younger boys excitement. “Maybe this might teach you to secure your valuables a little better, hey?” He shakes his head. “It didn’t even make it to the ocean, Joaquin. It fell out of your pocket before we were even in the air. I saw it, picked it up. Decided to keep it safe.”

He knew that if he’d given it back to Joaquin then that it would be all he’d focus on for the mission. He’d be berating himself so strongly that he’d almost lost the ring that he wouldn’t be able to give his full attention to the mission. Sam had watched Joaquin get hurt before and if he had his way, he’d never see it again. 

“And it took you this long to give it back to me!? Bro, do you realise what this is? How important this is? How could you keep this from me?” Joaquin’s voice is raised but he isn’t angry – he’s still angry at himself for losing it in the first place. He’s more than grateful to Sam for keeping it safe, but now that he’d lied to you over the phone about it… all of that could have been avoided if Sam had given it to him sooner.

Sam sighs and leans back in his chair. “Damn, these things are uncomfortable,” he mutters. “Listen, your girl sent me a text like an hour ago. She was asking if you were okay or if you were hurt, if anything went badly in the mission, cause she said she called you and you were acting all weird. I only remembered then that I even had it. I put it in my suit to keep it safe during the mission. I realised that the reason you must’ve been acting weird was cause you realised that you’d lost it.”

“And it took you an hour to come down two floors to give it back?”

“Nah, it took me an hour of thinking to decide whether to give it back to you tonight or give it back to you in the morning, Joaquin,” Sam admits. “This… this is a serious thing you’re planning on doing. You know that, right? I know it’s not my place but I just… I just wanted to make sure you know what you’re doing.”

Joaquin furrows his eyebrows. “Of course I know what I’m doing, Sam.”

“That came out wrong,” Sam huffs, then tries again. “I’m sure you have thought this out, but I just wanted to check in. You’re a public figure now. People know you’re the Falcon, they see you coming out on missions with me. People might target you now in an attempt to get to me. Your life is in more danger than it ever has been before. Even when you were serving in the Air Force full time. You sure your girl knows that too?”

One thing that Joaquin has always been confident about with you is that you knew the risks of dating him. You’d started dating him back when he was in the Air Force, long before he became Falcon. Throughout it all, you’d stuck by his side, even when he wondered if you wouldn’t. When people started commenting on his Instagram photos saying rather unsavoury things, or leaving rude comments about you, he wondered if it would scare you away from him. But it never did. You were completely loyal to him and he knew it. If you were affected by his job as the Falcon that much, you would’ve ended things long ago.

But you didn’t. You’d started making plans to move in with him instead, as soon as the lease on your apartment was up in two months time. You’d come over more often, spent more nights at his apartment. You’d made changes to your own life to accommodate his ever changing schedule. You were in this for real.

“She knows,” Joaquin nods. “I wouldn’t be asking her to marry me if she didn’t.”

Sam lets out a breath. “Okay, well… good. I just… I wanted to check. Make sure you weren’t rushing into things or asking her for some reason other than love.”

Joaquin smiles a little. He’s known for a long time that Sam is full of heart but this has reminded him. Despite all the sarcastic comments and jokes they make, Sam probably has a bigger heart than Joaquin himself. 

“Everything I do when it comes to her is about love, Sam, I promise you that.”

Not long after, Sam excuses himself and leaves the room, leaving Joaquin alone with the ring. The one he thought he’d lost forever, now sitting here on the table in front of him. Not a scratch or a lick of damage anywhere on it. Sam had done a good job taking care of it.

He crosses the room to grab his phone, still sitting on the bed where he’d left it, and sends you a quick text. Angel, you still awake?

Your reply comes almost instantly. You okay?

Joaquin sits down on the edge of his bed, eyes resting on the ring box on the table, and smiles. You got a spare thirty minutes to call so I can tell you all about how badass I was in the mission today? 

During the plane journey home, Joaquin decides that he needs to propose sooner rather than later. He doesn’t want to risk losing the ring again or something else happening to it. It’s why, when he gets back to his apartment, he calls you and asks if he can come over to your apartment the next night – he’ll bring some takeout for dinner. He’s more than relieved when you say yes, telling him you can’t wait.

But then the night comes and Joaquin is sitting beside you on your couch, your now empty takeout containers sitting on the coffee table in the centre of the room. He feels like his heart might beat right out of his chest with how nervous he is, but he thinks he’s doing a pretty good job at holding it together.

Joaquín takes a deep breath and turns to face you, clasping his hands together in his lap to force himself not to prematurely reach for the ring box in his jacket pocket. “So, I think I owe you an explanation for why I was weird on that phone call two days ago.”

You look at him, eyebrows raised. “Do you? I thought you were just tired. You ended up calling me back and talking about the mission with me so I thought it was all sorted.”

“It is sorted, but… well, I kind of lied to you in the first call,” he winces a little, hating to have to admit it to you even though he knows you’re not going to care once he explains everything properly. “Something happened after the mission and it really messed with my head but I couldn’t tell you about it then.”

He can see by the look on your face that you’re concerned about what he’s going to say. He hates worrying you like this and he doesn’t mean to drag it out so much but he’s also so nervous about what he’s about to do that he can’t help but stall.

“Joaquin, just tell me. Please.”

Your voice is small, full of a sudden fear, and just the simple act of hearing that is the encouragement that Joaquin needs to push him forward to do this, to tell you the truth and pull the ring box out of his pocket with a long, deep breath. 

“I took this with me on the mission to make sure nothing happened to it, but after the mission I realised that it had fallen out of my suit and I’d lost it,” Joaquin starts. His heart is in his throat at admitting all this to you and thinking about what is coming. “Turns out Sam had actually picked it up when it fell out prior to the mission. He came and gave it back to me after you texted him that you were worried about me.”

At seeing the ring box in his hands, tears immediately come to your eyes. This was what you were so worried about? You were so scared about what Joaquin was about to say, worried that some of your deep fears might be coming true, but instead it was your dreams that were coming true. 

You watch as Joaquin slowly moves from sitting on the edge of the couch to kneeling on the floor in front of you. He flips the ring box open, finally letting you lay eyes on the ring inside of it, and a sob erupts from you.

“I was gonna try and do this in a better way,” Joaquin chuckles. “I had all these ideas for plans of things to do, but in the end I decided that I just wanted it to be between us. I didn’t want anyones eyes on us while I did this, cause this is our moment.” He’d almost booked several restaurants, even almost booked flights to Paris to propose in front of the Eiffel Tower, but this was better than any of the plans he could’ve come up with. 

“I told Sam when he came to talk to me after you texted him that everything I do when it comes to you is about love,” he continues with a shaky breath. “You are the love of my life, angel. You have been ever since I first met you and I intend on loving you for the rest of my life if you’ll let me.” The words, which Joaquin had expected to be difficult to say when the time came, flow out of him with so much ease it surprises him. “So, I suppose what I should finally ask, since I know you’re thinking about how much you wish I would just ask the question and stop talking about everything else… is… will you marry me?”

You’re on the floor in front of him before Joaquin can even blink and in his next breath, your arms are wrapped around him, pressing your body to his. He laughs, a little shocked, as he wraps one of his arms around you, still holding the ring in the other hand. He can tell that you’re crying but he already knows they’re happy tears without having to see them. 

“So… is that a yes?” He asks, grinning.

“Of course it’s a yes!” You exclaim, pulling away from him. The look on his face makes you fall in love with him all over again. The way he’s smiling at you sets butterflies off in your stomach. “Will you put the ring on me?”

You extend your hand and Joaquin wastes no time in removing the ring from the box and sliding it onto your ring finger. He can’t keep smiling and his face is starting to hurt but he doesn’t care. He’ll deal with a sore face from smiling forever if it means seeing you this happy. The fact that he is the reason behind this smile makes him smile even harder.

“It’s so beautiful, Joaquin,” you marvel, unable to take your eyes off of it. 

“Just like the woman wearing it,” he says, unable to help himself. “I’m just glad I didn’t actually lose it in the middle of the ocean. I was just about ready to start a dive team to find it before Sam gave it back.”

You meet his eyes and laugh, shaking your head. “You’re an idiot, Joaquin Torres.”

“I might be, but at least I’m your idiot,” he grins.

With a smile, you lean forward and press your lips to his, wrapping one of your hands around the back of his neck. He kisses you back instantly, arms wrapping around you to hold you close. When your fingers make their way into his hair, though, he grunts a little in pain as they brush against the bump on the back of his head. He’d forgotten about that.

You pull away, eyes concerned. “Are you hurt? Did you get hurt on the mission?” 

Joaquin is quick to confirm that he isn’t. “I hit my head when I was in the hotel… this is so embarrassing to admit,” he laughs softly. “When I was still sad cause I thought I’d lost the ring, I leant back and hit the wall… a little harder than I intended to. I guess it left a bump… but it doesn’t mean you have to stop kissing me, y’know…”

Thankfully, you accept his poor reasoning for his sore head and kiss him again, your fingers moving out of his hair and instead resting on his shoulders. He’s already counting down the days till his head is fully healed – he loves the feeling of your fingers in his hair.

After that, you only break apart for air when you really need to.

“So… this means I can call you my fiancée now…” Joaquin mutters against your lips.

“Oh, that’s true… fiancé… I like how that sounds,” you hum in reply.

“I’m one step closer to being able to call you my wife now,” he says, smiling.

“Hold your horses, Joaquin,” you laugh, pulling away from him despite your desire to stay as close to him as humanly possible. “Let me be a fiancée for a while, okay? Now,” you lean back against the couch. “Tell me all about how you lost this beautiful ring of mine and how it happened to come into Sam’s possession… and then we’re gonna call him and thank him for keeping it safe when my fiancé couldn’t.”

Joaquin laughs, leaning against the couch beside you and reaching down to take your hand in his, his fingers spinning the new ring around on your finger. “You’re never gonna let me live it down, are you?”

“Oh, baby, even our great-great-grandchildren will know about this.”

[vrystalius]

NSFW Alphabet — Kyojuro Rengoku

A NSFW alphabet all about the flame hashira.

Pairing: Kyojuro Rengoku x afab!reader

Thank you so so much @erexart for making this cover art! My first reaction upon seeing this was literally “oh my.” since I opened in the middle of my class XD This is so gorgeous!! Please please go check her out and leave some support, she’s an awesome person!

A = Aftercare (what is he like after sex?)

Kyojuro can’t suppress it. He’s very smile-y and cuddly after a passionate night. His large arms would snake around your waist, pulling you tightly against him. His thick fingers would slowly brush over your skin, accidentally tickling you in the process sometimes. His hands are still rough and calloused, even after retirement, but you never minded. In fact, it makes you pleasantly shiver. His face would be glistering in sweat with a couple hairs sticking to his forehead. His eyes would be a little droopy and a lovesick smile would be spread all over his face. His voice would be a little horse and much quieter while whispering praises and love-declarations into your ear, his fingers running through your hair.

Your husband loves taking care of you, so expect to be pampered in all ways that are possible. To him, aftercare is just as important as the sex itself, so Kyojuro’ll gladly wash your body with either warm, damp towels or prepare a soothing bath for you if that’s what you prefer. If you manage to get out of bed right after him making you see the stars and universe, you can spot him in the kitchen by the stove, cooking a simple meal for the both of you to enjoy in bed. If you’re lucky, you get to enjoy the view of your husband’s muscular back, decorated in scratches you left behind in an attempt to hold onto something, anything, while trying to handle his size. Kyojuro doesn’t mind them, quite the opposite. His confidence gets boosted when spotting them in the mirror.

“You’re so beautiful, love. The brightest light in my life, so beautiful… you need anything, my flame? I can get you whatever you wish.”

B = Body part (his favourite body part of his and yours)

Kyojuro favours his chest the most. It used to be incredibly muscular, being able to flex the one, then the other in a funny or teasing matter. He especially found your interactions funny, how you poked his soft pecs and tensing them right after you touched them. It makes you giggle a little, so he’d gladly present his naked chest on purpose, so that you can squeeze and poke them as you like. Now, after retirement, he can’t control his muscles as much as he used to, meaning they got even softer. You love to give them a cheeky squeeze or a poke randomly throughout the day. It tickle a little when you do that, so Kyojuro’ll let you do as you please! Even if you give them a squeeze during sex. It surprised him when you do so, but your husband’ll just continue on with movement when you do.

His favourite body part of yours are your eyes and how they sparkle when Kyojuro brings you your favourite dish, or how they glister when you cry. Or, his favourite expression of yours, when they roll back into your skull. You look so drunk on the pleasure he’s giving you, you can’t even control your own face anymore- he finds you so cute looking like that.

“Hm? You wanna squeeze my breast? Sure, go ahead! If you like, you can lay your head on them, I think they’re soft enough to be used as pillows! Would you like to try?”

C = Cum (anything to do with cum)

Kyojuro’s incredibly flustered after cumming onto your body, anywhere really. Especially if you swallow it all, that’s when he’s beginning to ascend. He let out one satisfied, deep groan before finishing and staining your beautiful body. His abs and abdomen would be all twitchy, trying to control the overwhelming pleasure of his organism by redirecting the feeling onto other areas of his body.

He’s hesitant to ask, but your husband wants you to squirt onto his face. Kyojuro is curious on what it’d taste like to be honest. He’s eaten you out before and does it almost everytime you two sleep with each other, but you never squirted on his face before. He isn’t actively trying to make you do it, but he really, really wants you to do it. He’s too shy to ask though.

“Y-You make me burn s-so brightly- Ah!-“

D = Dirty secret (a dirty secret of his)

Something that surprised even himself was how Kyojuro began fantasising about taking you in more public spaces. Not exactly somewhere where people can really see you, but he’s imagining dragging you aside into a secluded area like a forest or just a room inside the residence where the risk of being caught is a little higher. It makes him nervous to think about, taking you while also needing to look out for any other people that may come too close. He would pump his cock into his fist faster and faster while thinking about it…

E = Experience (How experienced is he?)

Kyojuro was raised well and saved himself for you, his future wife. After making sure you’d agree to marry him and that you are willing and happily ready to sleep with him, he’ll try to do some research beforehand. Your then-boyfriend snuck around his father’s house, but to no one’s surprise, found nothing on anything remotely related to sex or similar. After finding nothing, he moved onto the archives of the demon slayer corps. Of course, there was nothing there either, only scrolls and books on ancient breathing techniques, tactics on how to fight demons and all that stuff. He was hopeless and decided to give up, going in unexperienced and with the hopes to perform well enough to satisfy you.

“My flame, do you think Shinobu keeps some kind of records or books on reproduction?… Why I’m asking? No reason. I-I’m just interested in the biology of it!”

P = Position (his favourite positions)

1. Mating press

That way, he can push himself especially deep inside of you while having your legs rest on his shoulders. Kyojuro especially loved leaning down to you, watching your face heat up and how your eyes roll back. By staying so close, he can closely watch how close you are, how pretty you look like this and how intimate it feels being so close to you.

2. 69

Oh he loves the feeling of making you squirm and shudder above him while you’re struggling to take him with all the stimulation he’s giving you. Kyojuro gets easily lost in your essence, often switching form the 69-position to you just sitting on his face while his own cock is twitching and aching for stimulation, but the way he’s eating you out, you can’t concentrate on anything else but not grinding onto his face for even more stimulation.

G = Goofy (Is he more serious in the moment? Or humorous? etc.)

You know Kyojuro as a rather energised, outgoing and loud individual, but while having your legs rest on his shoulders while his hips thrust deeper and deeper, he hets much more passionate. He’s trying not to be funny, but sometimes he accidentally makes you giggle by not being able to control his hair. If he makes the mistake of not tying it together beforehand, his bright flame like hair will be falling into his face or just fly around everywhere, maybe even tickle your nose by leaning downwards during an particularly pleasurable movement.

“A-Agh, my hair- Apologies my love, can I borrow your hair-tie just for during… this?”

H = Hair (How well-groomed is he?)

Kyojuro doesn’t really like being completely shaven. He prefers keeping it more natural and let his hair grow out a little, but not too much. He trims it regularly and of course washes himself. It’s extremely important to him to stay clean snd healthy, for both you and himself. Colour wise, his pubic hair matches his eyebrows, being very dark, almost black.

Regarding you, Kyojuro does not care if you shave or not, it all tasted the same and makes you sing those pretty moans for him. The most important thing is that you stay clean for him, that’s all.

I = Intimacy (How is he during the moment? Romantically.)

It almost surprises you how attentive and intimate your husband can get, even after years of marriage. For him, sex isn’t only about pleasure, but about lovemaking and being attentive to all your needs, physically and mentally. Kyojuro takes his time beforehand to kiss and maybe even flirt with you, as if courting you for the first time ever.

During sex, he would stare at your face during the whole time, covering your skin in kisses and caresses, his hands exploring every inch of your gorgeous body. His moans would consist mostly of whimpering broken praises while his brows furrow together and sweat runs down his skin.

“I love you, I love you, gods!! H-Hah, I love you…”

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Kyojuro doesn’t masturbate very often, but he does get aroused more often than he’d like to admit. Sometimes, he has to relief that pent up over the weeks. What turns him on the most is your scent. Any clothes of yours or just rolling over in bed onto your side switches something inside his brain. So, he mostly masturbates with the help of something you wore before and gave to him (with your consent of course). It doesn’t matter if it’s panties, shorts or a shirt, having your intoxicating smell near him makes him shudder and cum almost immediately.

One time, you gave him one of your panties for an extremely long mission. You alone just handing it to him so casually almost made him cream his pants.

K = Kink (one or more of his kinks)

1. Praising kink

It goes both ways, but hearing you praise him makes him cum almost immediately mid thrust. Kyojuro’s eyes would go wide and he’d lean down to you, peppering your face in kisses while burying himself deeper within you with a loud moan while thanking you quietly, his large hands squeezing your waist and pulling you closer to himself.

Your husband lives, laughs and loves praising you all day every day, that also means during sex. Seeing you blush just a little boosts his confidence greatly.

2. Exhibition

Kyojuro shudders everytime he thinks about the idea of being caught. Perhaps somebody hears your loud moans or his grunts and comes to investigate, catching you in the act. His heart races a little when thinking about asking you to help him out in the alleyway, looking out left and right to check for anyone coming. He doesn’t want to have a thing for being risky or doing it in semi-public spaces, but your husband just can’t help to fantasise about trying to make you scream louder and louder, risking being caught by a poor and probably afterwards traumatised kakushi.

3. Light Bondage

Kyojuro wants to know that you can fully trust him, and sometimes you can demonstrate it by be willing to be a little restrained. Just some loose ropes around your wrists to keep you from squirming too much. While you can’t escape, your husband, he’ll use the opportunity to its fullest to tease and play around with you by just barely using his fingers on you, instead of eating you out just giving you light kitten-licks or just caressing your body in admiration.

“Louder, m-my flame, please- Gods, I-I wanna hear you.”

L = Location (favourite places to take you)

He’d prefer to take you in your shared bed where it’s the most comfortable, but sometimes, Kyojuro would like to make love to you in the hotsprings. The steamy warmth surrounding you two, your naked body pressing right up against his, it may stir a couple of things within him like the overwhelming desire to mount you right now. The scents, the water, just the moment in general makes the perfect place to make love, don’t you think? Beneath these beautiful stars and admits the rocks and woods surrounding the hot springs…

M = Motivation (What turns him on, gets him going?)

1. Your confidence

Kyojuro is drawn to your enthusiasm and confidence like a moth to a flame- whatever you’re proud of, he’ll be 100% prouder, even if it’s just you managing to flip a pancake by tossing it in the air. Impressive non the less! But seeing you be confident in your own abilities and not needing him for a task makes him feel needed by you. If you don’t need his strength opening that jar of jam, how about Kyojuro satisfies you in other ways?

2. Being close after a long day

Your husband is often cuddly during the evenings of a long day. He still refuses to stop training even after retirement, so he’s still exhausted after a long day. Kyojuro loves to pull you closer and shower you in affections by peppering kisses all over your neck. He smiled against your skin when you squirm under him when he rolls on top of you, pinning you against the bed, his palms cupping your ass, giving it a gentle squeeze.

“Darling, can you… uh.. can we cuddle while I put.. myself.. into you? You’re just so warm and I promise you I’ll make you feel good, my flame…”

N = No (something he wouldn’t do, turn offs)

He’d never degrade or humiliate you, even if you may be into it. Kyojuro fears he might hurt your feelings or make you feel worse about yourself, wich is exact opposite of what he’s trying to do during sex. He’s trying to make love to you, not… degrade you.

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving)

Receiving

Kyojuro can barely look at you while you’re sucking him off. His wide eyes would be staring at a random point on the ceiling, his mouth agape and a little drool running down his chin. His hands would be tightly gripping both sides of your head, trying to get even more pleasure from your warm mouth. If you ever dare to tease his tip with your tongue, prepare your face to be covered in his essence in a matter of seconds. He’s extremely sensitive and cums embarrassingly quickly when you pleasure him orally. If you go on your knees while he’s leaning against a wall, Kyojuro would be concentrating on not breaking down with the amount of shaking his thighs are doing.

Giving

He’d rather give than receive any day, you being his absolute favourite dish besides sweet potato and miso soup. Kyojuro’ll drop onto his knees whenever you need him to, willing to take you anywhere at any time. His hands would be tightly wrapping around your legs, pushing them onto his shoulders for support when you’re laying down. Although he prefers it if you sit onto his face, that way he can solely concentrate on eating you and playing with your clit. Sometimes, he’ll try to overstimulate you just to make you squirm and jump away. It makes him grin every time.

“My flame, my love- you taste divine… hah.”

P = Pace (Is he fast and rough? Slow and sensual?)

Kyojuro tries to be slow and sensual, savouring every second of feeling you wrapped around him, how you squeeze and squirm around, but that is also the reason he really can’t be slow and sensual. His waist snap against yours in an incredible speed, chasing his own high while trying so hard to bring you the exact same feeling he’s feeling right now. But when you take control and straddle him instead, your husband loves to watch you struggle taking him in fully and how slowly you’re is moving up and down his shaft- if you decide to be quicker, his hand would quickly slam against the headboard in a desperate attempt to hold onto something while you make him see stars.

Q = Quickie (his opinions on quickies)

Kyojuro enjoys the playful nature of them and how spontaneous they are- you pulling him aside from his task just to seduce him? How perverted.

He enjoys them but doesn’t prefer them over full sessions. Your husband has surprisingly a lot of desire pent-up and is ready to bed you anytime you want, so he always has time for you coming onto him first. It’d feel like a break from a stressful day or a distraction from a particularly boring task— so he enjoys it!

“A-Ah, such a needy wife I-I have.”

R = Risk (Is he game to experiment?)

Yes! Kyojuro likes keeping things spicy in the bedroom by willing to experiment with you- whatever you like, he’s down for it (except humiliation of course)! He also has a thing for semi-public things, so he’d be more than willing to try things out in that department. Overall, if you want to try out spanking, food play, hair play, temperature or just plain vanilla, he’s down for everything! Please, use him for your pleasure! He’s even open to a little more… experimental things.

“P-Pegging? Really? Ahh… I trust you, I do, but… could you give me some time to think about it?”

S = Stamina (how many rounds can he go for? how long does he last?)

Kyojuro can and wants to go as many rounds as possible. Even after years of neglecting endurance and stamina training, your husband still has the stamina of some kind of beast. He fights through overstimulation like a soldier, if that means bringing pleasure to you then so be it. He can handle a little sting.

It also takes a while for him to cum in general. It’s not particularly hard for him to cum, he just doesn’t to. Besides, it makes him grin how you whine about already being spend and he has not even finished once.

T = Toys (does he own toys? does he use them?)

You two share one rubber dildo. No further comment.

U = Unfair (how much does he tease?)

Given how much Kyojuro enjoys making you squirm and moan, he does like to tease a little. Not to the point of making you beg, but just to make you pout a little. It just turns him on all over again.

Also, he likes to tease you during the day by slipping his hand under your skirt or pants, cupping a feel of your assets before smiling brightly at you like nothing ever happened. Maybe he’ll even slip in a finger or two.

“What’s that look, my flame? I’m just feeling up my wife!”

V = Volume (how loud is he, what sounds does he make)

Kyojuro grunts and moans a lot, not shying away from showing how much he’s enjoying himself. Sometimes he might get a little embarrassed by moaning too loudly, so he’d bury his face inside your neck while keeping a steady pace, whining a little at the feeling of you tightening around him. It makes him blush a little hearing the sounds he’s able to produce thanks to you.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for him)

Kyojuro loves to have cuddly sex with you. Cuddles are already his favourite, so cockwarming him while he holds you close is the closest he can get to the holy gates of heaven. Feeling your warmth around his length makes him almost feel a little droopy, his face buried in your neck while trying to subtly grind his hips against yours to stimulate you as well. His hand would be tightly gripping onto your waist, steadying you while he gently thrusts inside you, not being able to handle just being inside you without moving.

“Can I move a little? I-I promise I’ll be gentle, love… Gods, I love you so so much..”

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes…)

He’s physically impressive, just like the rest of him. Kyojuro is well endowed and proportional to his tall, broad and muscular frame. Sometimes he’s nervous about hurting you, but your delightful moans reassure him pretty quickly. His thickness watches his wrist.

His pubic hair is taken care of but he’s not completely clean shaven.

(Again, sorry for this being so short and having no measures. I honestly have no idea XD)

Y = Yearning (how high is his sex drive?)

Your husband’s drive is quite high given his passionate and energised personality, wich only increased after retirement. He will barely act on it though, being insecure about being too needy or too much for you. Instead, he suppresses his desires and waits until you come onto him first. That way he can be sure you really, really want him and are not just acting like you want to have sex just because he is horny.

The downside of him suppressing his lust is that it all comes out once you two have sex; he’ll eat you out, he’ll make you cum twice before even thinking about sliding his length in, and after he does, his hips smack against yours, creating an incredible lewd rhythm and loud moans.

Z = Zzz (how quickly he falls asleep afterwards)

After a particularly long session, Kyojuro would be spent. He’d doze off almost immediately after making sure you’re okay and he didn’t got too harsh with you. His soft cheek would be pressed up against your arm, his snores vibrating through your whole body. His heavy arm would be draped over your chest. You couldn’t help but smile a little at how his squishy cheeks looked so cute and how cuddly he always got after sex. You can’t help but look forward to cooking together with him in the morning.

🎃

Hope it was worth the wait @akazasfiancee ! <3

Finally got this done! I hope you all enjoyed reading it<3 Again, thank you @erexart for the beautiful cover art, I’m so grateful for you being so patient and kind to be. I’ll be looking forward to seeing more of your gorgeous art!! Please go check her out!

Anyways, make sure to EAT, SLEEP and DRINK enough!!

Take care of yourselves <3

Here’s my October event masterlist 🎃

[mandukkul]

Weird Boyfriend — ot7

synopsis: things your Enhypen boyfriend does

tags: bf!ot7 x f!reader, crack/ humour

warning: none

word count: n/a

likes + comments appreciated

author's note: Thank you for 1k followers! i know i don't actively post on here because its a hobby account but i seriously am so grateful for for all the support!!

#°❀⋆manny's 1k celebration event .ೃ࿔*:･

희승 | heeseung

- has toxic league humour running in his veins

- don’t let his cool sexy hot guy persona fool you

- one time you caught him on YOUR twitter account OLBITERATING his own haters

- lich got you banned on twitter for saying kys your mums a hoe!

- thank god he doesn’t know how to dox or else he’d abuse that shit out of that ability

제이 | jay

- actually tends to drown you out on instinct now

- NOT BECAUSE HE DOESNT LOVE YOU

- but you seriously talk so much and about so many different things

- your ability to switch from one topic to another is uncanny so he’s bound to miss a few things

- plus he can’t waste good memory storage on the 100 reasons why superheroes are just grown adults with accepted fursonas

데잌��� | jake

- is so smart and yet lowk so dumb

- like his brain just turns off around you and you don’t know if you feel happy that he feels comfortable around you or sad that he makes you do all the thinking

- playing fire boy and water girl would suck! because you’re yelling at him to wait for you because he can’t jump over the green liquid but bro is nawt listening and thinks he can raw dog it (he doesn’t)

- makes you rage quit!

- also the type to say “babe i just found this awesome new underground artist i think you’d love them”

- and it’s like rex orange county or soemthing 😭

성훈 | sunghoon

- leaves a message that only appears when the mirror fogs up

- something like “you’re stunning”

- also leaves cute messages around the for you to find.

- “you got this!” “you’re the best!��� “you’re so handsome” “you are so strong and buff!”

- okay that was a bit weird but you love sunghoon regardless

- you bring it up with him and he laughs like it’s the smartest idea in the world

- only, his laugh seems a bit too genuine

- turns out he’s been leaving those messages around for himself.

- #can’tgoadaywithoutmydailyaffirmations!

선우 | sunoo

- lowk a diva

- gets mad when you don’t want to go and get a sweet treat with him

“im just too full, get one without me”

- fuck off. and he sulks until you cave in.

- when you bring him around on shopping days with your friends, he ends up gossiping with them and shopping and you’re just standing there like YOUR the bf being forced to walk around and follow them

- at least he ends up getting ALL the tea and you debrief at home

정윈 | jungwon

- lowk judgemental but loves you so much so don’t take it to heart

- like you bite his bicep and he gives you a look that’s akin to killing all his future hypothetical bloodline

- or pull on his teeth

- or pick his nose

- like stop being a weirdo (affectionate)

- but then he says outrageous shit

“okay but like what if we fuse, i would totally be satisfied with life if i lived under your skin” “wonnie… you aren’t going to skin me alive… right?“what? no i just want to crawl under your skin, i think it’d be warm, and snuggly”

- you may do weird shit but he says weird shit

- “i just want you to stop saying odd shit”

- but don’t be fooled, he still judges you with a loving look

니키 | niki

- fake ass emo!

- spends at least 20 minutes posing to take a good selfie for you and sends it to you and actively checks if you seen it

- and when you do see it, acts like he “just took it randomly” LIKE WE KNOW YOU VOGUED THAT SHIT RELAX

- tries to act nonchalant when you give him a dry ass reply:

“okay, riks, whatever you say”

- JUST BELIEVE HIM FOR YOUR OWN SAKE

- one time on call, he caught himself using his higher register

- so next sentence he drops like 2 octaves and acts like it’s his normal voice

“and so i totally think big chill is the hottest alien out of ben’s arsenal” “yeah 👹” “????”

- gaslights you to thinking that’s what he sounded like the whole time

- also, would give you a thousand yard stare if you take a photo of his left side

[4rticbolt]

Bitterspicy? |Master-List|

Sanji x !Fem!Reader, fluff, crack, swearing, bubbly clumsy reader, cuteness aggression, one-shot

You check out what Sanji’s making and get a little too curious…

Like stuff like this? Check out my masterlist, there’s one much similar but a little spicier. Also please check out this amazing artist! She does awesome commissions: @salibadati

•-•-•—•-•-•-••-•-•-•-•—•

You glided down the hall, hopping down the stairs as you excitedly made your way to the kitchen. You were eager to tell the cook you’d caught a fish. Or—well, somewhat, it was a flounder of the sorts, a mixed half-seabeast that left the scaredy cat trio utterly petrified.

Regardless, it’d been a fight to reel in, but thanks to the boys it hadn’t been too much of an issue—to you at-least. Your pole had been the lucky one, and you’d gladly handed it over to Luffy who’d been happy to eat it.

The sea-beast was large, large enough to keep a steady food supply for a week—that is if the captain didn’t eat it.

Swiftly passing the kitchen doors, a heavenly smell drafted through. Something similar to curry, maybe with peppers, left a comforting sense to your nose along with the herbs. You smiled, swinging yourself around the service hatch.

“Sanji! Guess what I caught,” you pipped, hanging on the corner.

“Hm? What’d you catch love?” his tone was gentle, using something he only used for you.

Sanji’s back was turned, and you couldn’t help but notice how nice his tux carved to his shoulders. His sleeves were rolled, accentuating his fore-arms that left your mouth watering.

Gosh, he could be so clueless. Or he couldn’t. You could never tell with him, from teasing to showing off to acting oblivious and naive he was a mix of the three.

“I have no idea,” you muttered, coming up behind him. Along the counter, your attention drifted to the organized ingredients he’d aligned in black and white bowls.

“It’s big and scaly though,” you shifted a bowl to check its contents, curious to what it was. “I’ve never seen anything like it, it’s weird. It has whiskers like a cat—but it looks like a pufferfish mixed with a halibut.”

He hummed softly in response.

“Oh, and it was really snappy too. You shoulda’ seen Usopp, he was terrified,” you laughed, leaning over to smell some of them. Your nose was immediately assaulted with spice and warmth, and you careened back.

Sanji nodded, listening with a smile. Your laughter was music to his ears, and he’d wished he could replay it over and over.

“Big and scaly? Did you catch a sea king?”

“No, I don’t think so, Robin said it’s high in protein though. She even pulled out a fancy fish-log to make sure.”

“Hm, well that sounds promising, good job Love we needed that,” he praised, stirring a pot he’d only break out for stews and curries.

The acknowledgment flew over your head as you sniffed a bowl’s contents, grown oblivious to the use of his affectionate tones. He threw love and praises like a child blowing dandelion seeds, leaving fluttering white fuzzlies of positivity you’d sprout from.

“Thank you,” you chirped, popping carelessly beside him.

“Zoro’s cutting it down for us now actually, so you don’t have to. I figured you were busy making something,” you jumped, leaning into his side, creeping slowly to check the food you so craved. You always knew it’d look good, but that didn’t change the fact you still wanted to see it.

The steam hit you like a burning fog, making your eyes water.

“Finally, moss-head’s actually pulling his weight,” he snarked, hovering his hand to quickly shield your face.

“Careful it’s hot sweetheart.”

“Yeah I know, it just smells good.” you shrugged, wandering back over to the small dishes.

The mindless compliment sent his heart racing, and his eyes turned to hearts. “Why thank you my Angel, you’re too kind.” He swirled, mixing the turmeric colored dish.

“Of course,” you muttered, sniffing a spoon of something you expected to be sweet, but it stung, yet again leaving your eyes to water.

You dropped the spoon, leaning back, coughing slightly.

“Phew, the fuck is that?”

“Oh? Those are the chillies,” he laughed, adding some cloves to the pot, keeping casual in your presence. You joined often in the kitchen, appearing time and time again and it’d just become a norm between you too. He watched as you inspected, he told, and you helped. It was a sweet balance, teetering on the edge of chaos with your clumsiness. Rather blunt recklessness in his opinion. But he’d loved you the same.

He found it endearing.

Though, this time you’d inspected a bowl of something sweet. Stark contrast to chilies and cayenne peppers from before, you simply wanted to taste. And the thought had been to quick to stop.

Your eyes wandered, purely drawn to Sanji’s fluent skills. Chopping vegetables and chicken so perfectly, it put his knives to shame.

You’d ironically been mesmerized, due to the fact he was so slim and tall, manly, and the literally epitome of a gentleman. Yet he worked with knives and food like a ballerina to her shoes.

Lost in the maze of your admiration, you’d mindlessly put a bit too much on the spoon to try, and the bitterness hit hard. You hadn’t paid attention, and now you payed the price.

A muffled cough sounded throughout the kitchen, and a hand flew to cover it, but it was too late. Your eyes watered and you immedialty regretted the impulsive decision.

Poofft . . .

Sanji paused. His cutting slowed, and he’d gently placed the knife down to wipe his hands. Maybe you’d sniffed the wrong bowl again? He thought, slowly turning around. But gods was he wrong.

Oh. Oh. Okay.

There was cinnamon everywhere. A clouded dust of brown had covered the counter, and he couldn’t even see your face. Had you—?

He urgently called your name, keeping ease.

“Mon Amour? Are you—is that the cinnamon?!”

He rushed to your side, eyes filled with concern as he finally met your teary ones. You turned to him in a coughing fit, splashing cinnamon painfully after. You owlishly blinked up at him, and his heart exploded at the sight.

His instincts told him to not make fun, but a light-hearted laugh escaped him before he’d grabbed a dampened towel for you.

His arms tenderly outstretched, wiping your face, chuckling, “Sweetheart what’d you even do?” he chided, sweeping his thumb over your chin.

“I didn’t mean’thu, I thought it—pff—“ another rasp of cinnamon launched between you, and you coughed. And he only laughed more.

Which turned to contagious giggles.

Sanji gingerly held your face, bringing your hand which held a cloth—close to your face.

He was truly your savior. Because you urgently spit it out, wincing.

“____, hun, here, there you go.” he said, pushing your brown tinged hair out of your face.

“Sorry,” you finally mumbled, surrendering in complete defeat and humiliation.

“I thought it was, I don’t know, like, edible—“

“It’s okay, you were just curious…though why you thought eating a spoonful of cinnamon was a good idea? I will never know,” he mused, looking quietly down to you. His thumb caressed your cheek and he fawned again. He squeezed your cheeks, and he was gone.

You looked absolutely adorable like this, and your perfume? Now infused with the spice? Did wonders.

This had to be what cuteness aggression was. Otherwise he wouldn’t be squeezing you so tight.

“Sanji let me go,” you muttered, struggling in the tight clasp of his hug. He only mumbled something whiny and incoherent in your ear, and your face felt like the burner of the stove.

“Just let me hold you, you’re too cute.”

You blushed, grumbling. What got slipped in his breakfast this morning? You rested your head on his shoulder and he tightened his grip, twirling you around.

You relaxed, giving into his affection. But smoke caught your glimpse.

“Uh, baby—“

“No. Let me hug you.”

“No you—Sanji!” You groaned, “The foods burning!”

[willowsnook]

He isn't you

salami, swiss cheese, and white bread please <3

joe burrow x gf!reader

he isn't you

The easiest thing about dating Joe Burrow was that he wasn’t the possessive type. Some girls liked that in a partner, but you found it suffocating. You didn’t need him to mark his territory; your connection was clear without that.

This dynamic was perfect for your busy life as an ESPN reporter. Covering college football meant you were often on the road, but Joe was fully supportive. When you were both home, you made time for each other, and when you weren’t, you checked in often enough.

One quiet morning, you felt Joe wrap his arms around you from behind as you cooked scrambled eggs and sausage for breakfast.

“Morning, sweetheart,” he mumbled sleepily.

You turned to smile at him, giving him a quick kiss. “Hi, Joey.”

He grabbed coffee for both of you. “What’s on the agenda today?” he asked.

“We have a new guy filling in this week,” you explained. “So, a longer prep session.”

“Someone you know?”

“No, he’s from a smaller affiliate, so we haven’t crossed paths.”

After breakfast, you kissed Joe on the cheek, grabbed your coffee, and headed out the door to the ESPN office. There, you were set to meet the new colleague, Harrison.

Outside, you spotted a man with curly brown hair and green eyes waiting by the door. “Are you Harrison?” you asked, shaking his hand as he smiled warmly.

“Yes, nice to meet you!” he replied cheerfully.

The day flew by. Harrison was easygoing, and you enjoyed discovering you had mutual friends and had even attended rival high schools. That evening, you told Joe all about your day and your new colleague.

“...I’m looking forward to working with him this weekend,” you finished, noticing Joe’s slight frown as he poked at his food.

“Awesome,” he murmured, not meeting your eyes.

“Are you okay?” you asked, sensing his mood shift.

“Yeah, just tired.”

“Was practice hard today?” You asked, taking another bite of your dinner. 

“A little,” he said, subconsciously digging into his shoulder muscle. 

“Let me give you a massage after we clean up then,” you offered and he smirked. “Just to help you relax.”

“I can think of another way you can help me relax,” he flirted, and you rolled your eyes and laughed.

-----------------------------------------------

The next Monday, Joe was not happy as he scrolled through his Twitter feed, having been tagged in tons of tweets about you and your colleague Harrison. 

“User1: Wow, the chemistry between Y/N and the new guy is unreal. Are we intruding?” “User2: Wonder how Joe Burrow feels watching his girlfriend get ‘rizzed’ on national TV.” “User3: Joe took two Ls this weekend: losing to the Eagles and seeing his girl flirting with her colleague on air.”

Joe knew you hadn’t meant anything by it, but watching those clips felt like a punch to the chest. He decided he’d stay out for the night, texting you that he was still with the team and might crash at Ja’Marr’s. You frowned, confused, knowing he’d been home just an hour earlier. His texts had been scarce all weekend, and his silence stung.

Y/N: Is something wrong? Are you mad at me? JB: It’s fine.

Something was definitely off, but he wasn’t ready to talk. Trying to shake off your worry, you settled in for the night alone.

-------------------------------------

The next morning, you buried yourself in work to distract from Joe’s cold shoulder. Harrison popped by your office, noticing your downcast expression.

“Everything okay?” he asked, taking a seat across from you.

“Joe’s mad at me, but he won’t say why,” you sighed, recounting the strange tension between you and Joe.

Just then, Joe appeared at your door, his eyes narrowing as they fell on Harrison. As you introduced them, Joe’s handshake was noticeably firm, and Harrison shot you a wide-eyed look.

You looked from him to Harrison, and it all was finally clicking in place, which instantly made you giggle. 

You smiled sweetly at Joe. “Oh, I was just telling Harrison that it’d be nice to have him and his partner David over for dinner sometime.”

Joe’s hand went slack, his surprise evident. “Yeah... that’d be great,” he stammered, dropping Harrison’s hand, relief settling over him.

The tension dissolved, and you couldn’t help but chuckle as Joe’s jealousy melted away, leaving him sheepish.

After Harrison left, Joe lingered around you in the office, quieter than usual but clearly wanting to say something. You leaned against the desk, watching him nervously run a hand through his hair.

Finally, he sighed. “Look, I know it’s stupid, but seeing you with him… I couldn’t help it. Watching people online talk about how good you two looked together…” He trailed off, his expression softening as he took your hands in his.

“Joe,” you said gently, squeezing his hands, “I like Harrison as a colleague, and he’s a great guy, but he isn’t you. No one could be.”

He smiled then, a hint of his usual confidence returning as he finally seemed to believe it.

You stepped closer, wrapping your arms around him. “You’re the one I come home to,” you murmured. “The only one.”

He pulled you in tightly, his voice quiet as he admitted, “I know. I just… needed to hear it.”

With the last bit of tension fading away, you leaned up, pressing a reassuring kiss to his lips. He wasn’t possessive by nature, but every now and then, a reminder didn’t hurt. And maybe you didn’t mind giving him one.

[ifnotlovepersevering]

Down the Road (Agatha Harkness x Reader)

Summary: your summon to the Witches’ Road unexpectedly reconnects you with the witch that left you behind

Warnings: angsty, anger between R and A, fight scene, injury (A), flashback to past abandonment, R is lowkey into dark magic but in denial, lovers to hurt strangers 😔 whatever will we do

A/N: I used a few different requests in my inbox as inspo. It can also be read as a continuation of Closer. I’m planning on a part two but am open to suggestions on where to take this next! Enjoy 🖤

Tag List: @nyx-aira @crystalline-possession @clxwnnyy @lilibeth-tate @highgaytohell @amethyst-bitch @shinkomiii @agnessharknes @academiagaymess @midnight-lestrange

A summon to the Witches’ Road seemed like exactly what you needed right now. You’d been keeping to yourself these days, staying out of trouble. But it’d been too long since you’d had some excitement and your hands were itching for something new. You were going in blind, but that’s always fun, right?

At least that’s what you’d thought. When the smoke of your white magic disappeared, you were greeted with the sight of your new ragtag coven. You counted four. Where’s the fifth?

“Hello,” you grinned at the youngest, a pale boy with dark hair. “I’m Y/N, I believe someone called?”

“Y/N? As in awesome-moon-powers-Y/N?” The boy exclaimed, grabbing the arm of the tallest one, who seemed equally excited.

You laughed. “I didn’t realize my reputation preceded me so much.”

“Are you kidding?” Now it was the tall one exclaiming. “You’re like, so cool. Incorporating the moon into your power? It makes you the jack of all trades. Healing, light manipulation, water control. I can’t believe you’re here!”

“Moon magic?” The older woman seemed sort of dazed. “I’d heard stories…but have never seen it for myself.”

Before you could respond to the group’s praise, a familiar voice rang out. “What the hell are all of you harping ab-”

You turned around at the same time as footsteps behind you halted in their tracks. You felt your heart drop as you realized why the voice was familiar. It couldn’t be.

Agatha Harkness stood in front of you in all her glory. Gone was the young witch you had known, in her place a woman exuding power and elegance. Both of you eyed each other, surprise and apprehension on your faces.

•••

Your last memory of Agatha was that smirk of hers. You two had started as rivals but a trip that you went on together changed that. You grew closer and animosity turned to friendship, which turned into something much more. So many nights of you sneaking into each other’s rooms, honing your skills, and eventually using your hands to explore each other.

On one of your many visits to the woods for spell practice, the two of you encountered a shapeshifter. You and Agatha fought it off but it forced you to use the full extent of your powers. You were young and had only just started to incorporate the moon into your witchcraft. The fight drained you completely, leaving you weak.

At home, you were checked into the infirmary. News spread quickly of the battle; Agatha, being Evanora’s daughter, caught attention easily. Her power had been a topic of dispute within the coven for some time. You resented the others for how they treated her, especially her own mother. The parts of Agatha that made them turn away were the same you admired undyingly. You loved her.

You had been drifting in and out of consciousness for hours before you finally woke up to see Agatha at your bedside. “They want a formal questioning,” she had told you softly, her hand holding yours. In response to your furrowed brow, Agatha brushed the hair from your forehead. “It’s nothing serious. I’ll be back before you know it.”

You sighed, knowing Evanora took every chance she could to hurt Agatha. “Give them hell anyway.”

“You know I will.” Agatha had smirked, and with a soft kiss, she was gone. Unbeknownst to you, it was the last time you were going to see her.

You woke up the next day, surrounded by the early morning darkness. It was eerily silent; you’d expected Agatha to be back by now. Your strength had returned, and you searched for Agatha everywhere you could think of. No one was around, every room empty.

Eventually you had come to the clearing and saw the husks of the other witches. Their bodies surrounded a post, covered in scorch marks from what you could only assume to be Agatha. You felt yourself freeze as the truth dawned on you. It was more than questions, it was a sentencing. Yet Agatha had obviously survived.

Hot tears had filled in your eyes and a lump formed in your throat before you had collapsed into sobs. She’d survived, of course she had. But she hadn’t come for you. Agatha, the girl you loved without question, whom you had embraced completely. The girl who encouraged you with your magic, the one you’d helped with controlling her own. She had left you.

Over time, the hurt faded but it never quite left. You never looked back, not at her, nor the version of you that broke that day in the clearing. You drew from the pain and let it fuel your ambition. As you travelled and your power grew, you’d heard stories about Agatha. How she’d honed those skills you’d practiced together into something to be both admired and feared. But her betrayal was enough for you to never want to seek her out again.

•••

You blinked, snapping out of your reverie.

“Y/N was the other name on the list? I can’t believe you wanted to leave her behind.” The boy’s voice piped up from behind you.

You scoffed. “Don’t be so surprised.” There was no hiding the snark in your voice, and you saw Agatha’s face drop right before you turned on your heel. “This was a mistake,” you muttered, walking away from the group to recollect yourself.

The rest of the group watched as you left. “What did she mean by that?” Alice hissed at Agatha. Everyone looked at her expectantly.

“Well,” Agatha grinned sheepishly. “We may have some…uh…unfinished business if you will.”

Jenn rolled her eyes. “Whatever, you have to make her stay. We need her to do this.”

Agatha groaned as the others nodded and nudged her towards the area you’d retreated to. But the annoyance was an act. Seeing your name on the list had stopped her in her tracks, bringing back memories she’d tried to bury. And now here you were, and she couldn’t hide from the swirl of emotions within her like she’s used to doing. Her heart still ached for you but it was unlikely you’d want anything to do with her.

She sauntered over to where you were sitting on a log by yourself. Standing close to you, she had a moment to take in your appearance. Somehow you were even more beautiful than she remembered. Time had clearly treated you well, and Agatha found her gaze catching on your features as she took in the sight of the face that haunted her memories.

She cleared her throat. “You can’t leave now that you’re here. The Road. It won’t let you.”

You looked up at her from where you sat. “You think I don’t know that?” You snapped. “I wouldn’t have come if I knew it was you.”

That stung. “Well it’s nice to see you again too, doll.” Agatha sneered.

“Oh save it, Agatha.” You stood up, eye level with the other witch. “I think we both remember who left who. Don’t play dumb now.”

“You act like I made that decision by flipping a coin. You don’t know the half of it.” The nonchalant attitude Agatha had been putting up was slipping away, revealing the raw emotion underneath.

You shook your head and turned your back to her. “Forget it. I’m already going to have to suffer through the rest of this thing anyway. I don’t need some shitty explanation from you.”

But Agatha wasn’t one to take that for an answer. She grabbed your arm, forcing you to turn back and face her. “No,” she hissed. “You don’t get to do what they did. Don’t repaint me as callous because I was never like that with you.”

You clenched your jaw, feeling a lump forming at the back of your throat. You couldn’t help it - the hurt you’d buried for this long was coming back up, and it was as sharp as the day it’d arrived.

“Callous?” You laughed humourlessly. “No, leaving me behind wasn’t callous. It was cruel. You’re cruel.”

You could see Agatha’s cheeks flushed in anger, and her mouth opened with another rebuttal when a shriek rang through the air back where the rest of the coven was standing. Both of you jumped, and Agatha dropped your arm.

“What the hell was that?” You shouted at Agatha over the shrieks, which had grown louder.

“Salem Seven ring a bell?” Agatha snarked, but her eyes were filled with fear.

“What the fuck, Agatha.” You all but yelled as the two of you began running back. Somehow you’d never encountered any of the Seven before but that didn’t mean you wanted to start now. They were definitely pissed at Agatha, but it was unlikely that they were happy with you either, as the only other survivor of their mothers’ massacre.

The shrieks were coming from both the coven and a dark, hooded figure who you assumed was one of the Seven floating above them. “Run!” The boy screamed, and everyone began sprinting down the road.

Suddenly you heard Agatha cry out and a thud. You turned to see Agatha on the ground, the hooded figure hovering over her. You stared incredulously as Agatha put her arms up to shield herself, but made no other move to put up a defence. What is she doing?

The Salem Seven witch lunged towards Agatha and you quickly shot a beam at her, making her fall to the ground. As you ran over, you saw the witch was already stirring, not quite dead yet. You began reciting a spell that’d become second nature for you now, your hands falling into the familiar motions.

Agatha watched in awe as you drew the many surrounding shadows towards the figure on the ground. You made a sharp movement with your hand and suddenly the figure that was beginning to rise from the ground was being surrounded by dark tendrils.

Muffled screams could be heard as the shadows twisted tighter and tighter, until the figure fell limp to the ground. You weren’t done, however. Another practiced movement of your hands and you watched as the shadows engulfed the witch, dragging her downwards into the ground until she disappeared like vapour.

With the threat gone, you rushed to Agatha’s side. You could see a gash on her arm where her sleeve had torn, blood seeping out of the wound. “What were you thinking? Why didn’t you fight back?” Anger mixed with worry as you searched Agatha’s face for answers.

“Careful there, Y/N. Wouldn’t want to look like you care.” When you didn’t indulge her teasing, the other witch sighed. “Why do you think I’m here?” She asked, gesturing around her. She saw the confusion in your face and waved her hand dismissively. “Long story doll, I won’t bore you.”

Typical. Even all those years ago Agatha would opt to keep you in the dark rather than explain herself. “Fine.” You said, helping her stand. “Let’s find somewhere to sit so I can patch you up.”

You turned to see the rest of the group standing nearby, a mixture of awe and apprehension across their faces. The boy seemed the most awestruck. “How did you do that?” He exclaimed. “Where did she go?”

The oldest of the group spoke before you could. “The shadow realm.” She answered, eyeing you warily. “No one should be doing that.”

“Why don’t we um, find a place to sleep? While Y/N takes care of Agatha.” The tall one spoke now, gesturing for the rest of the group to follow her and leave you and Agatha alone. You watched as they hurried away, the short one throwing a worried glance back at you.

“So, shadow work huh?” Agatha spoke lowly as you examined her arm. “Didn’t realize you’d begun dabbling in my side of things.” Her tone was playful but probing.

You turned your head sharply towards her. “I haven’t. It’s not the same thing.”

Agatha chuckled darkly. “Oh isn’t it? Don’t get so high and mighty now Y/N. I’ve heard things. That good girl persona of yours may be working on everyone else, but not me.”

You didn’t answer, instead pulling her arm into the moonlight coming in through the trees. At your silence, Agatha kept going. “‘Oh wow! Moon girl is so amazing and talented! She can do anything!’” She said mockingly. “All admiration when you’re doing what they like. But you saw the look on their faces just now. Everybody switches up when we start talking real power. The kind you and I have.”

Okay yes, you could admit that the shadow stuff is a bit iffy. But it wasn’t anywhere close to as iffy as using the Darkhold, like you’d heard Agatha did. That was different.

“All I’m saying,” Agatha continued, as she watched you weave the light with your hands to heal her open wound. “Is that we’re much bigger than them. Than this. We’re destined for domination, Y/N.”

You shook your head. Years later and it was still all about power with her. Grand plans and limited following-through were classic Agatha. Enough. You stood up, Agatha’s arm now healed. “You’re talking about powers you had, and that I have.” You said coldly, taking satisfaction in the way her jaw clenched at your words. “Maybe focus on getting those back first.”

With that, you turned on your heel and stormed away.

[quiteros]

Leviathan x Secret Otaku!Reader

18+, Suggestive, gn!reader, minors dni, ageless accounts blocked

Thinking about Leviathan excitedly showing off his physical game collection, there’s a bunch of different genres, some vintage, some new, all he could ramble off in great detail about.

But there’s one section you realise he has been subtly steering you away from, quickly picking something to show you each time your eyes start to drift. You still get glimpses of the titles, seemingly innocent to anyone else, but to a secret nerd like you, it’s clear as day.

It’s porn.

Levi’s got a stash of porn games brazenly out and decorating his shelves. He’d become a little too confident in thinking he was the only nerd in the house. That only he’d be able recognise such a thing. That it’d be fine to have them out, no one would know.

And though growing anxious, he still thinks he’s safe. You can only see the spines, the covers that censor the truth of the game’s contents. You don’t play games like he does, you wouldn’t get it.

But then you reach out to grab one. He almost moans in relief when the cover is tame. A pretty cover, graphics of pink frills and bows, nothing to hint at it’s true, salacious nature.

“This looks cute.” He wants to snatch the thing out your hands, but the interest in your voice is mild enough that if he does, you’ll get suspicious.

“There’s not much story. It’s just a regular puzzle game.” Leviathan tries to sound casual as he pulls out a game with a much flashier cover. “This one’s awesome, I swear, it was nominated for six categories in the annual game awards.” He’s shoved the thing over the one in your hand. “It’s about this guy who—”

“I like puzzles.” You bring the game back to view. It’s fun watching Leviathan attempt normalcy. “And it looks so pretty. C’mon Levi’ let’s play.”

Before he can even argue, you’ve got your hand on his, dragging him to the console in the corner of his room.

“I’m not sure this is the right console.” Leviathan tries to lie, but you tap the little label on the cover. “Oh haha, I guess it is...” He’s scrambling for a way to get the game away from you. “Still it’s been a while, I should check the disc.”

“Looks fine to me.” You’re being cruel, you know you are, but the sight of Levi’ so distraught is too good to ignore. You continue the act of indifference, tongue peeking out just for show, as you go to put the disc in. “Hmm, here’s the drive!”

“No— [Name]! I don’t think—”

“Aaaahhhhh!”

He thanks demons as he’s saved by the bell— or Mammon, the screech of the man running down the halls capturing both of yours attention.

“Dammit.” You huff, slipping the disc back into its case, allowing Leviathan to finally let his shoulders sink. “Sorry Levi’.” You look at him like you really mean it, like he isn’t basking in relief. “Let’s go figure out why he’s making such a ruckus, huh?”

Leviathan nods his head, eager to be out his room, away from all the games he will be sure to put away from now on. “Yes! Let’s!”

[darknight3904]

Every Breath You Take

Chapter One- The End of the World

Tommy Miller x Fem!Reader, Slowburn!Joel Miller x Fem!Reader

Summary: Living in Austin wasn't the most glamorous existence. At twenty years old, you still can't figure out what you want to do with your life. Unfortunately, fate steps in, leaving you to the mercy of the apocalypse and the kindness of your neighbor Joel and his brother Tommy.

General Warnings: This story is 18+. Included, but not limited to: Explicit smut (chapters will be marked with a ** ), canon typical violence, language, gore, and horror. Minor character death, child death, SA themes (not described in detail), suicide, and depression. These warnings may change at any time, as this story is not completed.

Reader, Joel, and Tommy are not polyamorous; the story explores romantic relationships with both Tommy and Joel, but not at the same time.

Word Count: 6.3k

The Last of Us Masterlist / Series Masterlist

This part depicts a suicide attempt. If you or anyone you know is struggling, check out this link.

@freythecrazyfae @greenwitchfromthewoods @amyispxnk @heartpatch I offer new Joel for you 🤌🏻

Friday, September 26, 2003, Austin, Texas

It’s your stomach that wakes you up. Hunger pains your middle half as you stumble out of bed towards the kitchen. The stove’s clock blinks 7:34 AM as you rummage through the near-empty fridge. 

You press the button on the answering machine as the frying pan for your eggs heats up. The voice of your dad fills your ears as you crack your first egg. 

“Hey, my trip is going well. Gotta big meeting later on today, and then I’m going to see Big Ben. I’ll pick up a cool souvenir for you.” 

You smile at the thought of your dad bringing back a silly t-shirt from London for you. He’d been away for a week now on a trip for the company he worked for, something about helping expand into England and possibly the rest of Europe. 

“There’s this awesome bakery here, the best pastries in the world…Oh also! My flight got moved, I should be back on Sunday around eight in the morning, I need you to ask Joel to borrow his truck, gonna need you to pick me up. That damn mechanic emailed me to say our car is totaled. See you soon, bye.” 

You groan in frustration. Of course, it was just your luck that the little sedan you shared with your dad was done. You had gone grocery shopping right before your dad left, and it’d gotten hit in the lot by some idiot who hadn’t even left a note to apologize. Hopefully, your neighbor Joel will let you borrow his truck; you’d probably have to pay him the gas money, but at least your dad wouldn’t be stuck in some overpriced taxi. 

You all but inhale your eggs before setting the coffee maker up to begin its morning brew. The loud yell of your neighbors has you scurrying out the front door, hopefully, you can catch Joel before he leaves for work. 

“Morning!” Sarah greets you when she sees you leaning over the fence 

“Good morning.” You smile and wave at her as she hops into the back seat 

You always had a bit of a soft spot for Sarah. You’d been an occasional babysitter for her for a few years now, and getting to watch her grow from snotty brat to confident teen filled your heart with joy.

Joel is loading some crates and a tool bag into the bed of the truck as he says something to the Adler’s. 

“Nice shirt.” 

You turn your head to see the man you’d been crushing on for nearly two years now. Tommy Miller flashes you a warm grin as he gestures to your worn-out t-shirt that says AC/DC. 

“Oh, um, thanks.” You squirm, feeling self-conscious in your sleep shorts and unruly bedhead. 

“You actually listen to them or did you just buy the shirt cuz’ it looks cool?”

Ugh. How’d he know you bought the shirt based on looks? You roll your eyes and try to retain your confidence when Tommy laughs a bit, seeing through your facade. 

You hadn’t even thought to put a bra on as you hunch your back a bit, trying to hide your chest away. Tommy looked so well put together, a nice button-down paired with a white tank sat on his body while his dark hair glistened in the sunlight, fuck he made you nervous. 

Regretfully, you tear your eyes away from him to stare at his older brother, “Hey Joel.” 

“Mornin’, you’re up early.” He takes note 

“Early bird gets the worm.” You chuckle, as he nods, “I was just wondering if I could borrow your truck on Sunday morning? My dad is coming home and our car is apparently toast after that hit-and-run I told you about.” 

“Shit, the one at the store? M’ real sorry.” Joel shakes his head, “I’ll let ya borrow the truck if you fill the tank up on the way back.” 

“Deal.” You smile 

Joel gives you a nod before turning back to his garage to load more stuff up. You’re about to turn away to disappear back inside but Tommy’s voice stops you. 

“Been a while since I saw you.” 

“Uh, yeah. Sarah’s last birthday party right?” You ask 

He nods, “Aren’t you supposed to be away in college? You’re like 22.” 

“20,” You correct him, “I’m taking a bit of a gap year or well, years. Gotta save some money first, plus I dunno what I want to do.” 

Tommy nods, “Don’t rush it, it’ll come to you eventually.” 

“Did you ever go to college?” You ask, thinking he might have some advice for figuring out your life. 

“Yeah, I did-” 

“You did one semester at the community college and dropped out after you failed your midterms.” Joel deadpans as he comes up from behind to slap his brother on the back.

“Well, I got experience.” He shrugs as Joel scoffs 

“Yeah, experience in failing.” Joel shakes his head, “Now. quit flirtin’ we gotta drop Sarah off before we go to the site.” 

Joel pulls his brother off, Tommy waving goodbye to you as your face burns, surely he wasn’t flirting with you. At whatever age he was, there was no way Tommy would be interested in you. A 20-year-old who had no current path in life.  You call out to them as you suddenly remember what Sarah had said to you the last time you had watched her for Joel a few nights back.

“Happy Birthday!” 

“Thanks.” Joel nods with a small smile on his back 

“He’s officially a dinosaur now!” Sarah yells out the open window of the backseat of the truck 

The engine turns over and you swear you hear him scold her and tell her “36 ain’t that old.” 

You spend your day cleaning the house and hanging laundry out on the line in the backyard. Around noon you walk down to the small Dollar General that’s half a mile from your home. There isn’t much in the way of actual groceries but you can make do with the bag of rice you find on the shelf along with a bag of frozen broccoli from the shitty freezer the store has. This, along with the chicken nuggets in the freezer should  hold you over until Sunday when your dad will be back to buy groceries with you.  

The loud screech of police sirens tears down the road as you watch three cars whizz by. 

“I don’t know what the world is coming to.” The cashier shakes her head as she rings your stuff up, “All day long they’ve been flying up and down that road.” 

“Some people are crazy.” You hum, and she nods in agreement as you toss a pack of gummy bears onto the counter.  

The walk back is short and peaceful as you soak in the last bits of summer heat Texas has to offer. Soon it will be in the low 50s and you’ll be bundled up in jeans and sweaters. You spend the rest of your day paging through the newspaper’s job section, hoping that something was out there that paid better than the shitty diner you were currently working at. Perhaps you could get a job at that new daycare center that opened last week. 

Despite the day being uneventful, you’re tired and by 11 you’re tucked into bed, a movie playing on the little TV you begged your dad for your room when you turned 15. You’re dozing when the loud knock has you jolting from your bed. The stove’s green numbers blink 11:47 as you pass the kitchen.

You pad down the steps, glancing at the baseball bat that leans near the front door, you had placed it there as a sense of security, you didn’t think you’d actually need it but who the hell was knocking this late? 

You inch the door open, keeping the chain secured and the bat hidden behind your back. Instead of an axe murderer, you’re met with the disheveled look of the block's favorite single dad. Yes, Joel was more loved by the neighbors than your dad was. After all, your dad didn’t offer to fix people’s fences and sinks for free. 

“I thought you were like Freddy Kruger or something.” You say, undoing the lock and opening the door fully. 

“Y’watchin’ too many horror movies, kid,” Joel says with a sigh

More like not enough. You love horror films. 

“Listen, Tommy got himself in trouble. I gotta go get him. Could you sit in my house with Sarah? She’s already sleepin’ but I don’t wanna leave her alone this late.” He asks, “You can sleep on the couch til’ I get back. I’ll even pay you if you want.” 

It's an easy decision, at this point Joel doesn’t even need to pay you to watch Sarah, you love hanging out with her. But, the idea of a possible extra ten dollar bill in your purse just for sleeping on the couch is hard to turn down. 

 Joel reminds you to lock your home’s door as he leads you over to his house and through the front door

“What kinda trouble is Tommy in?” You ask curiously as you breathe in the warm scent that was Joel’s home. A hint of vanilla from the candle you gave Sarah for her birthday along with the scent of what could only be described as man.  

“Dumbass got arrested for punching some dude. I gotta stop at an ATM to get the cash for his bail.” Joel sighs as he rummages around a closet

“So much for your birthday being about you.” You laugh as he tosses a blanket at you 

“Tell me about it. Fuckers been driving me nuts since he could walk.” Joel sighs, “My number is on the fridge, there's some leftover chicken wings if you’re hungry. Sarah won’t bother you-” 

You nod, “I’ll be fine. Been watching her for like six years now, I don’t think she’s gonna start giving me trouble now.” 

You shoo Joel out the door and lock it behind him before sinking into the worn leather of the couch. It’s already dim but you switch the lamp on the table beside you off, tossing your flip phone onto the coffee table. The couch smells like Joel, a hint of cologne followed by that musk men gave off. As if it’s magic, your eyes flutter shut, sleeping stealing you away. 

You wake up to Sarah shaking you awake. 

“Wake up.” She whispers 

“Sarah…Go back to bed, your dad's out with your uncle.” You groan, trying to pull the blanket over your head 

“The Adler’s dog got out. I’m taking him back,” Sarah says 

You groan again but stand up when you hear the front door open. So much for Sarah not causing any trouble. You wrap the soft blanket around your body, slip your sneakers on, and follow her out. Cool air flows through the thin material of your pyjama pants and T-shirt. You sleepily watch as Sarah pulls the dog towards the front door. God, you wish she’d hurry up, you loved the girl but you also loved your sleep. 

All of a sudden, the stupid dog twists out of her grasp and sprints off into the darkness, leaving the collar in Sarah’s hands.

“Mercy!” Sarah yells as the black and white dog books it into the night 

“Well, shit.” You mumble, walking up to her watching the ball of black and white fluff disappear into the night.

“Now what?” She asks 

You glance at the Adler’s open door and back in the direction where the dog ran off. 

“Uh, I guess we're going to tell them we lost their dog. Maybe Mr. Adler can come help us look for him.” 

Sarah nods and turns on her heel to walk into the home. 

Something isn’t quite right when you walk into the Adler’s house. You’d only been there a few times but something was amiss. The air felt almost heavy as you followed Sarah closely. She calls for Mrs. Adler softly and you stop in the hallway, something red catches your eye on the carpet as Sarah walks towards the kitchen. You crouch down and stare at the spot, it looks like blood but you’re not entirely sure. 

A loud scream as you jump and the little swinging doors that lead to the kitchen slam open. 

“Run, Run!” Sarah screeches as you stumble backwards.

An inhuman growl reaches your ears as you shuck the blanket from your shoulders, grabbing Sarah’s arm and pushing her ahead of whatever it was. Had the dog circled back through the back door? Did it have rabies? All you knew was that- 

What the actual fuck?! 

Sarah pulls you out the front door and you get a glimpse of Nana Adler running towards you at an inhuman speed. A loud screech fills your ears as you and Sarah scramble down the walkway. 

You keep your grasp firm on Sarah’s forearm, pulling her towards Joel’s home, eager to get inside and bolt the door.

Headlights illuminate you as tires screech, Joel jumps out before the truck even stops and grabs Sarah from you, hugging her and asking her if she’s hurt. 

“Joel!” another voice yells

You spin around at the sound of Tommy’s voice. Nana Adler is sprinting towards you, something white dangles from her mouth as she wheezes and growls. 

“What’re we doing Joel?!” 

You notice the rifle in Tommy’s hands as he hesitates to take aim. What the fuck was happening right now? 

Sarah’s shirl scream fills your ear as Joel steps in front of both of you, his strong arm swings a wrench, hitting Nana Adler before she can reach either of you. 

“You killed her…” Sarah breathes when the old woman doesn’t get up 

You stumble backward away from the scene, nearly tripping over your feet and the curb of the sidewalk as you bump into Tommy’s chest. 

“Get in the truck.” He says softly, ushering you to the vehicle 

“W-Wait we can’t leave her…we gotta call the police…” 

You’re in shock as you stare at the body, Tommy pushes you into the backseat and slams the door, Joel does the same for Sarah as you run your hands over your face. 

Sarah is asking her dad questions as Tommy speeds down the road. You don’t know what's happening. Just ten minutes ago you’d been blissfully asleep, cuddled up on Joel’s couch and now you’d watched Joel kill an old woman who was trying to…well you weren’t really sure what she was trying to do. 

The truck is illuminated with an orange blaze as you pass a house completely engulfed in flames. You watch wide-eyed as what must be a dozen police officers and even three fire trucks speed past the home, not even dropping a bit in speed. 

“That’s Jimmy’s place…” Tommy trails off as he stares at the home that's caving in on itself 

Sarah reaches over to you, grabbing your hand. You glance at her, she’s never looked younger than she does right now. A frightened 14-year-old girl stares at you while her father and uncle debate where they should go, Joel suggesting Mexico of all places. 

“I don’t have my ID.” You muster out, thinking of your wallet and license that sits abandoned in your purse at home, “I-I can’t go to Mexico…”

“We’ll figure it out.” Tommy says, “We gotta get somewhere more remote first.” 

The truck slows and you whip your attention to the front where a man is waving from the side of the road. A woman, probably his wife, is holding a kid in her arms as she yells, their minivan a smoking mess behind them. 

“What’re you doing?” Joel asks suddenly

“They got a kid.” Tommy reasons as he begins to pull off to the shoulder of the road 

“So do we.” Joel reminds his brother, his icy tone sending goosebumps down your spine. 

You watch the exchange as Tommy looks at his brother like he’s lost it. 

“Keep going.” Joel orders 

Even in the dark, you see the regret on Tommy’s face as he accelerates, the strangers screaming for him to come back. 

You squeeze Sarah’s hand, pulling her closer to you as Tommy and Joel curse when they see the highway is blocked by bumper-to-bumper traffic. 

“I’m scared,” Sarah whispers as you run a hand soothingly over her curly hair 

“It’s okay.” You affirm, “We’re gonna be okay.” 

You’re not sure if you’re saying it to her or to yourself as Tommy drives the truck right off the road and into the field.

“Fuck!” Tommy curses 

You hear the whirl of a helicopter, a huge line of cars and trucks and god knows what else blocks your way. 

“It’s the fucking army.” Joel groans, “Go north, we cut through town.” 

You click yours and Sarah’s seatbelt as Tommy gets back on the road. 

The town is a mess. People are screaming and running all over, cars are running lights and smashing into each other. You squeeze your eyes shut, praying this is all some bad dream and you’re still on the couch sleeping. The sound of glass smashing as you flinch, as you wildly look out the windows. A huge crowd tumbles out of the movie theater, Joel yelling for Tommy to reverse as he rests a hand on Sarah’s knee. 

You watch as people jump on other people, it looks like they’re biting them and your eyes widen. Seriously, what the fuck was happening? 

“Dad, Dad!” Sarah yells 

You spin around to look out the back window, above you an airplane five times the size of your home is rapidly descending right for you, flames flying off its wings. 

“Foreword, GO!” You scream at Tommy, leaning forward to smack his shoulder. 

A loud scream fills the car, maybe it's from you, maybe it’s Sarah’s, perhaps even Tommy’s or Joel’s but the last thing you feel is your face smacking the back of Tommy’s seat before it goes dark. 

The first time you met the Millers, you were 14. Freshly widowed, your father had decided to sell your childhood home and move from the countryside into the Austin suburbs. You of course didn’t have much say in it and got stuck packing your things into a UHaul and following him.

You had been struggling with a box of books when it had been effortlessly scooped from your arms. A tall man with dark brown messy curls stood in front of you. 

“I got it.” He says confidently

“Thank you.” You huff tiredly, you had been unloading boxes all day and you still weren’t even halfway there. 

You scoop up a lamp and lead him towards the house. 

“M’ Joel. I live next door.” He nods to his home 

You give him your name with a small smile as you hold the front door for him. 

You hadn’t noticed it, but a little girl, maybe no more than eight years old, was clinging to the back of his shirt, shyly staring up at you.  

“Oh, this is Sarah, my daughter.” Joel cranes his neck to see what his kid is doing behind him

You hear your father come down the steps, he and Joel introduce themselves to each other as Joel walks off into the house with him, leaving Sarah standing nervously in the entryway. 

“Hi, Sarah.” You couch down to her level

“Hi.” She greets 

You glance down at the stuffed rabbit she has tucked under her arm. 

“Does your rabbit have a name?” You ask 

“Mr. Peanut.” She confidently says as she rocks back and forth while staring at you with big brown eyes that match her father’s.

“Well, Sarah. I think we’re about to be great friends, I happen to think Mr. Peanut is the perfect name for a rabbit.” 

“Hey! Wake up!” 

The scent of smoke fills your lungs as you try to get your bearings. You’re upside down and Tommy’s arms are linked under your armpits, pulling you from the now flipped truck. He hauls you to your feet and gives you a once-over. 

“You alright?” He asks, “Nothing broken?” 

“I’m okay.” You mumble, wiggling your limbs.

“Nose is bleedin’, I think it’s alright though,” Tommy says quickly

You touch your face, and sure enough, your nose is gushing like a fountain down your shirt, Tommy pulls a handkerchief from his pocket and hands it to you. 

“C’mon, let's move.” He motions 

You both barely get two steps towards the other side of the vehicle where Sarah and Joel are before a flaming police car slams into the overturned truck, cutting you and Tommy off from them. 

“Go to the river! We’ll find a way, Get her out of here, Joel, Go!” Tommy yells over the roar of the flames 

Through the gaps in the cars, you watch Joel scoop Sarah up, she must’ve been injured in the crash. Tommy is saying your name and something else but you can barely register what's happening. All around you, the world is falling apart, people are screaming as others climb on top of them, snarling and wheezing. 

It’s the motion of Tommy waving something in front of your blurred vision that has you coming to. 

“Can you shoot?” 

He’s holding a silver revolver out in front of you. You’d ask where it came from but you already know, after all this is Texas, everyone and their mother kept a revolver in their glove compartment. 

“Look, cock this back,” He pulls the top bit of the gun back towards you, “Point, and pull the trigger.” 

You nod, shaking hands reaching for the firearm. 

“There’s six bullets in there, don’t start shootin’ unless I tell ya.” He commands 

You’re practically glued to Tommy as he leads the way through the chaos. You wish you could squeeze your eyes shut but then you’d be tripping over your now untied shoelaces. 

You’re not sure where the river is but you pass many people who are pinned down by others. Lucky for you their attackers seem to be too focused to pay much mind to you and Tommy. Your right-hand reaches out and fists the back of his shirt when one stands up about 25 feet away, staring right at both of you. 

“Shit.” He mumbles 

“What now?” You whisper 

The man stumbles towards you, a low growl leaves his lips, his eyes are red, and his skin is pale; a deep bite mark is on his neck, blood flowing from it onto his once clean white shirt. 

“Don’t move.” Tommy commands, his rifle raised to point at the man, “Let us pass.” 

Then, all at once, the man begins sprinting at you both, a loud scream leaves your lips, and Tommy’s rifle goes off once. The stranger crumples to the ground, blood and brains oozing onto the pavement as you stare down at him. 

“Let’s go, fast, Gotta find Joel,” Tommy says, stepping over the now-deceased man before offering his hand to you 

“You killed that man…” You trail off, hesitant to take it.

Tommy rolls the man onto his back, long white tendrils of…something squirming out of his mouth, weaving across his teeth and down his cracked lips. 

“That ain’t no man,” Tommy comments, “Not one I’ve seen before.” 

Tommy all but drags you through town, weaving his way through back alleys and even through a busted open shop window, you don’t let go of his hand once the whole time. 

The grassy slope that leads down to the riverside is a bit slippery from yesterday's rain. You can’t see Joel or Sarah yet but you’re sure they’re around here somewhere. Tommy hears it before you, the sound of Joel’s voice. He drops your hand and takes off in the direction of his brother and niece. 

You stumble after him, tripping and landing on the muddy ground when you step on your laces. You groan, your body now caked in mud as you stand back up. The deafening sound of gunfire has you freezing. The sound of an automatic gun fires, followed by another shot that sounds like Tommy’s rifle. 

A few more steps and the riverbank comes into view, Tommy stands there, illuminated by the headlights of what looks like a military vehicle. Another dead body lays at his feet, and a soldier, covered in gear, lays face down in the muck. 

Your feet freeze when you see what Tommy has been staring at. Joel is hunched over Sarah, his hands and lower arms drenched in blood from the gaping wound in her stomach. He’s begging her to be okay as he yells for Tommy to help him. 

It feels like you’re on a roller coaster the way your stomach is sinking as you watch Joel rock back and forth with Sarah, her limp body and empty eyes staring back at him. It’s a scene that's bound to haunt you all for the rest of your days. 

Several snarls have you spinning around, Tommy calling for Joel. You’re not sure where they are but those monsters from Main Street are coming for you all. 

“Joel, get up,” Tommy says, his eyes scanning the area warily

Joel remains still, his hand skimming Sarah’s face, closing her eyes for the last time. 

“Joel!” Tommy yells, stomping towards his brother to try and pull him to his feet, “We gotta go.” 

Somehow Tommy hauls Joel to his feet, his arm coming under his brother’s to support him. Tommy turns to you, his rifle slung over his shoulder, 

“Let’s get moving north, get away from people.” 

Your body moves on autopilot, following his orders. As you walk away from the gruesome scene, you hear Joel begin to wail Sarah’s name as Tommy drags him away from his dead daughter. 

You’re not sure when you started crying, all you know is that your eyes are bleary, and warm salty tears are mixing with the dried blood from your nose. The three of you were currently sitting in an unfinished house, part of some new development that was being constructed for rich idiots looking to live near the capital. 

The area was empty when you stumbled across it, unfinished homes looming in the brisk morning air, just barely illuminated by the sunrise. 

You sit next to Tommy as he tries to get a better look at your nose which is aching from earlier. He wipes at your tears with his fingers before declaring your nose should be fine. 

Joel hasn’t moved an inch from where Tommy dropped him. His back rests against the wall across from you, his knees are drawn up to his chest, and his head is cradled in his hands as he sits there still as a statue. 

“There’s a porta potty outside, gonna go take a piss, I’ll be back,” Tommy mumbles, standing up 

You rise to meet him, the least you could do is let Joel have a bit of privacy to mourn his daughter. 

“I’ll come with you.” 

You kick at the brown dirt and rocks under your feet, listening to the sounds of birds chirping. A stray cat trots by, unfazed by what has happened in Austin as it glances at you for a moment before continuing on.

The porta-potty stinks. You hover over the seat, thighs burning in exertion from the awkward angle, you are not interested in getting some horrid disease from this toilet as you pee. A sigh leaves your lips; at least the toilet paper was clean. 

The sound of a gun going off has you yanking your filthy pants back up and clamoring out of the porta potty.

You race back to the house to see Joel flat out on his back, Tommy kneeling next to him, his hands holding Joel’s head. 

“What the fuck were you thinking?” Tommy scolds Joel as he holds him still to get a better look at the wound.

A low groan from Joel is all that comes in response as you stare at what looks like a bullet graze. Your eyes fall to the discarded rifle that is a few feet from his right arm. 

“You ain’t dying on my watch.” Tommy huffs, pulling his button-down off to press to the side of Joel’s face. 

You piece together what has happened, Joel has just tried to kill himself, just hours after Sarah had died. 

“We have to leave, he needs stitches,” Tommy says, “There’s a truck parked behind the house, help me get his ass there.” 

Joel is partly unconscious as you and Tommy drag him around to the back of the house, Tommy smashes the driver’s window in and unlocks the car. The two of you heave Joel into the backseat before climbing in yourselves. 

You watch silently as Tommy hotwires the truck. You’re not sure how he knows how to do that but you’re glad he does. 

The truck speeds down the road as your brain churns, 

“I don’t think the hospitals will be open.” 

“Red Cross, maybe the military will have something, just gotta figure out where,” Tommy responds, eyes fixed on the road 

“If there is even still a military.” You mumble hopelessly

Tommy doesn’t respond and instead continues to drive. 

It takes nearly all day but eventually, you spot it, a military blockade of sorts and a few tents painted with that red and white medical cross. It’s sitting on a high school campus in the football stadium that says “Home of the Austin Anteaters.” 

Tommy stops the truck when five soldiers come out, all armed to the teeth and each wearing a gas mask.

They have you both pull Joel from the car who resists, mumbling a resounding no as Tommy gestures to his head and the wound on his side from last night. 

One of the soldiers stares at the three of you as if they’re deciding whether or not you’re worth it. Then, they’re motioning and someone shows up with a gurney for Joel. They wheel him away and you’re left with Tommy. 

“If any of you are bit or scratched, we shoot. Doesn’t matter what wounds he or either of you have. Better to tell us now instead of in there.” 

“We’re both clean.” Tommy says for the both of you, “Promise.” 

You nod, trying not to shake as they lead you past the guards and into the stadium. 

“This way, miss.” One man says, leading you into one tent before Tommy is led to another. 

A female soldier stands in the tent, a clipboard in hand, she jots down your name and age before telling you to strip, her face obscured by the gas mask she wears. 

“Excuse me?” You stare at her like she’d lost it 

“I need to make sure you haven't been bitten. We think that’s how the infection spreads. Until we can get some form of device to detect it, strip searches are how we’re keeping everyone safe.” She explains, “Please remove your clothes or I will have you escorted out of the zone.” 

You huff a breath of air, she’s serious about this. You pull your mud-caked, blood-soaked shirt off before dropping your pants as well. 

“Undergarments as well.” She prompts boringly

Tommy is standing on the other side of the tent when you emerge. Like you, he has a bag tucked under his arm, according to the soldier it was filled with an MRE along with bedding materials and water bottles.

“You alright?” He asks as the two of you are led to whatever temporary lodging the military had set up. 

“Fine, just wasn’t expecting to be strip searched.” 

“Tell me about it, the guy back seemed way too eager for me to drop my pants.”

 

You roll your eyes, his joke not landing the way he wanted it to. 

As it turns out the “housing” the woman mentioned was just rows and rows of tents set up next to each other. The soldier leading you drops you off at a tent, hanging the clipboard off one of the tent polls before wandering off. 

“Did they tell you when Joel would be done?” You ask, entering the small tent, tossing your stuff onto one of the cots 

“Said they’d bring him to us provided he cleared the safety checks.” Tommy shrugs 

He sits across from you on his own cot, pulling open the MRE that had been stuffed into his arms earlier. 

“Chicken pesto and pasta.” He reads aloud, “One of the better ones.” 

“You eat a lot of these when you were serving?” You ask, staring at yours which says chili macaroni.

“Yeah. Don’t eat the peanut butter they give ya, it’ll give you the shits for days.” He says 

“Noted.” You nod 

That night, it’s quieter than you thought it’d be for a field of tents filled with strangers. You lay on your side, unmoving trying to process what has happened, what you’ve witnessed. A pit of despair fills your stomach as you think of your father. Trapped in England, no way back to the States. Shit, he could be dead right now and there was no way for you to know. You think of little Sarah and the awful involuntary sounds she made when Joel tried picking her up. 

At first, it's quiet, you barely hear it but slowly it becomes louder and louder. The sounds of crying, soft sniffles at first before they turn into full-blown sobs. 

You turn on your side to see Tommy, curled up under his thin blanket, pillow stuffed under his head as he cries into it. You’re not sure what to do, do you turn away and let him cry in peace? Do you get up to comfort him? You feel numb. Like your brain can’t reconcile everything you’ve seen. 

A choking sound comes from the other side of the tent, and you shift, reaching for the plastic water bottle that sits on the ground. Prickly turf tickles your bare feet as you take two steps over, closing the distance between you and your companion. 

“Water?” You whisper 

Tommy turns, sitting up, wiping at his red eyes like he didn’t want you to know he’d been not so quietly sobbing. He pats the cot, gesturing for you to sit beside him. 

“Thanks.” He croaks, gulping it down. 

“I can’t sleep.” You admit 

He nods, “Me either.” 

You remain next to him, your fingers fiddling with the caked mud on your pants. You wish that military lady would’ve given you something to change into. At least you weren’t alone, Tommy was still in his clothes from yesterday. 

Your mind swims with ideas of how you might possibly reach out to your father. You can’t come to any actual conclusions though. Instead, you just keep seeing Sarah’s dead body and how Joel had called out to her as Tommy pulled him away. 

You remember the first time you really met Tommy Miller. It’d been a Friday in July and your home’s central air conditioning had broken on what felt like the hottest day ever. You were rotting in the front yard because at least the outside had a breeze, unlike the stagnant air of the house. You’d called your dad about a million times to tell him the stupid unit had died right after he left for work, of course, you’d gotten sent right to voicemail each time. 

“That ice pop is gonna be mush if you don’t eat it soon.” 

Your head whips to your left, and your neighbor's brother leans against the fence smiling at you. You’d seen him around before in the past few years, Joel had said his name was Tim? Tyler? Something with a T. All you knew was that he’d show up incrementally, sometimes to watch Sarah, other times to give his older brother shit. 

“Yeah well, so am I.” You huff 

He flashes you another warm smile, “And why is a pretty girl like you, melting away in the sun?” 

“AC went up in flames. At least there's a breeze out here.” You shrug lazily 

“Where is it? I’ll take a look.” He offers, “No charge, I promise.”

You eye him curiously unsure of how to respond to this practical stranger offering to fix the AC unit for free. 

“No thanks, I’ll wait for Joel to come back.” 

Last summer Joel had revived it for you and your dad, he could do it again. Besides, you didn’t even know his brother that well. And sure, this brother was pretty hot but you were also pretty sure he was like 24, far too old to be looking at you, even if you had been 18 for nearly 6 months now. 

“He won’t be back till’ 10. You’ll be sweating your ass off for another six hours.” He tells you. 

Fuck, you can’t take another six minutes, let alone six hours.

“Fine.” You relent 

Tommy, not Tyler or Tim, as it turns out is nearly as good as Joel was with the air conditioning. It takes about twenty minutes and a good kick to the unit’s side but he gets it going again. You race through the front door and hold your hands over the vents, laughing with delight when the ice-cold air hits your skin. 

“I’ll take it that sound means I was successful,” Tommy calls from the front porch 

You stop in the kitchen and pour him a glass of the sickly sweet lemonade you had mixed up last night before rejoining him outside. 

“You’re a lifesaver.” You grin 

Tommy mockingly bows and the lemonade shifts, dribbling down his fingers to the porch. He straightens and takes a long sip of the beverage, 

“Almost better than a beer.” 

Now you know he’s bullshitting you, you give him a playful shove and he smiles down at you, his dark curls glistening as he moves. Your face heats up, and a fuzzy feeling worms its way across your chest as he speaks again, 

“Let me know if ya ever need anythin’ else, I’ll be over here more often.” 

Next Part

Series Masterlist

Twas' the night before TLOU season 2...Joel, stay away from the golf course, please!

Brand new story, hope you all enjoy. :)

Comment to be added to the tag list. This tag list is not chapter by chapter, I carry the tags over to each part.

Tags:

[swampstew-stories]

You Picked Dare

Summary: Why the hell would you play truth or dare with a bunch of pirates?

Inspired by the mega awesome @magnuspirate who did this delighful tease of two hunky hunks hunking around

Warnings: nsfw but mostly language and suggestive content, no actual smut, Kid Pirates being the Kid Pirates. Killer x Female reader x Kid

Dare.

Dare. 

Dare.

Your bold statement had come out smug and confident, echoing in your head with a twinge of regret.

The Dare was to go into the hot springs and take a photo – of Killer and your Captain. Damn the others for knowing your kryptonite.

There was an opt-out option ��� to clean the communal bathrooms for a month. No fucking way.

As you walked through the island you took nervous hits of your blunt to ease the butterflies in your stomach. All you had to do was take a picture. There were no restrictions, you could be seen or hidden, as long as you got a photo of them that was all you needed to escape this torturous dare disguised as a group bonding activity.

Fuck the crew! You loved them but also fuck them. You were gonna get them back.

About a hundred yards away from the hot spring you took a final drag and snuffed out the remaining blunt. Giving yourself an internal pep talk as you took each step.

‘Position self behind a bush. Snap a picture. Sneak away and then run like the devil’s on my heels.’

Picturing your devil of a captain, your stomach coiled with anxiousness. Oh how you wished you could light up the roach.

Creeping between the foliage, you could hear Kid and Killer talking to each other in relaxed conversation. They didn’t appear to notice you, silently cursing as you realized they were still too far to take a photo.

Tip toeing on the patches of grass, you could make out their conversation more clearly.

“Ya ever think about sleeping with someone on the crew?” Kid suddenly asked Killer. You nearly fell over yourself when you heard the statement.

“Once in a while, rarely act on it though. You?” Killer mused.

“All the time.”

“Horn dog,” Killer scoffed.

“Can ya blame me? All our girls are hot as fuck.”

“Yeah, but I also see most of them as sisters…”

“You’re so pure,” Kid laughed. “Yeah they’re family, but they’re also not. I’m not saying I’d do anything about it either but it’s tempting some times.”

You felt as if you weren’t breathing, skillfully crawling around the shrubs eager to hear and see more, as silent as the dead. One breath and they were sure to discover you.

“Ahh is this about Y/N again?”

Time stopped. Your heart stopped. You didn’t dare move.

“Could be,” there was a tilt in Kid’s voice. “Don’t pretend you don’t think about her and what it could be like.”

“You’re being vulgar, which isn’t surprising, but what do you expect me to say? ‘Sure Kid I’ll bow out from another person of interest to give you the advantage as your friend.’” Killer legitimately sounded a little mad. Well like, personal hurt mad, not crazy mad which he was every single second.

“I’m a man with needs too. And I LIKE her.”

You wished to be a small lizard so you could watch them argue about you. Maybe the blunt was laced with something – wouldn’t put it past your crew to be honest.

Low growling preceded a laugh, and you could hear the sound of water splashing. Oh to the gods to be a fish in that spring.

“Alright fair enough. Would it make you feel better if we do it together? It’d be her choice who she’d choose no matter what, no hurt fee fees over it. Maybe if we come at her with a multi-partner thing, 50/50 she agrees?”

“Kid!”

“60/40?”

“Stop it.”

“Damn 10/90?”

More splashing of water, waves of it crashing over your coverage and wetting your clothes. Practicing your breathing exercises, you mentally pumped yourself up to get it over with. One snap and bam, you’re gone.

“What if we show her our dicks first?”

“KID!”

“Whadd’ya say Y/N? Wanna check the goods before you sample them?” Kid couldn’t hold back his laughter.

Gods be damned. They all sucked.

Gathering the last ounce of dignity and lighting your roach, you jumped out from behind the foliage with your camera, looking to the side as you snapped the picture. Whether is was worthy enough to pass was no longer your priority.

“IT WAS A DARE!!!!” you screeched as your turned on your heel and bolted. You poor thing, you didn’t make it past 1 yard.

“Oh you’re not going anywhere, Y/N,” Kid taunted as Killer wrapped his arms around you and picked you up. His towel becoming loose and distressed from your struggling. Bringing you back to the hot spring.

Taking the camera, Kid tossed it in the water with the smuggest face a motherfucker could make.

“We showed you ours, now we dare you to show yours.”

Originally posted - soon to be archived from main

[fantasykiri5]

The LAST day of Hermit-A-Day May: ETHO!! I added sparkles because he gets to be the specialist finale guy

You should ALL go check out the Tiltify!! There’s only a little over an hour left to pitch in (as of my posting this) and there’s tons of cool incentives and prizes that you could have a chance to win if you donate! We met our goal for the month the other day and it’d be so awesome to see how much we can surpass it by <3

[fir-fireweed]

Hey there, Fir!

I've always seen these fun "How would the ROs react if...?" asks and I wanted to try asking one myself!

How would each RO behave if the MC became sick and bedridden? And how would they react to the MC trying to pretend they're not as sick as they actually are?

Thanks for the awesome story, you're one of my favorite IF authors! 💜💜

Hi Power! 👋 I always love seeing your name pop up and I appreciate you so much! Thank you! ❤️

Calliope would absolutely fuss over you nonstop. She’d make you soup (don’t eat it. Whatever malady you have is better than what you’d get after eating her food. Trust me on this). She’d stay by your side the whole time and talk to you to distract you, but she’d also whisper while doing so, so you can rest if need be. She’d make little flying gyroscopes to whizz about your room while you’re convalescing. And if you tried to assure her you’re fine, she wouldn’t believe a word of it, and become even more of a mother hen. She’d tell you that you deserve to take it easy and have someone take care of you.

Corinne’s bedside manner isn’t the greatest, even if you’re in a relationship. She knows this about herself, and so she’d focus on what she can do for you. She’d bring you medicine, cook for you (her food is safe, she’s actually a good cook), tuck you in, wash your face and hands with a washcloth. She’d do all this with very few words, but her concern would be evident in the tender way she cares for you. Her duties would keep her from staying by your side, but she’d check in on you often. She’d also post a guard outside your room; partly to dissuade others from visiting you so you can rest, but also because she knows you’d insist you’re fine and try to leave.

Vicente would take care of you, also with few words, and an even worse bedside manner. He’d have a perpetual scowl—not because he’d mind caring for you, but because he can’t immediately fix you, and it’d frustrate him. He’d sleep in a chair by your bed. He wouldn’t trust another to give you medicine. That anime trope with one character taking the medicine and water and feeding it to another? Yep, that’s him. And if you insisted you were fine and tried to get up, he’d let you. He’d follow you closely and when you inevitably faint or become dizzy, he’d catch you and carry you back to bed.

Bayram would crack jokes and try to lift your spirits, but honestly, he’d feel a little out of his depth. He’d stay with you as much as possible, though he’d slip out from time to time, maybe take a swim to clear his mind. But his concern for you would eat away at him if he were alone too long, and he’d come right back. He’d be at a loss as to how to care for you, but he’d play his flute for you and be the best damn pillow you could ever ask for. And if you insisted you were fine and tried to get up, he’d wrestle you back down into the bed.

Thanks for the ask!

[moonstruckme]

obsessed with the idea of driving lessons with Steve or Eddie<3 in Stevie’s car orrr in Eddie’s van! reader being a terrible driver and steve or eddie being to nice to call it out :’)

Thanks for requesting!

Eddie Munson x fem!reader ♡ 1k words

You think you’d feel a bit better if Eddie didn’t keep squeezing his eyes shut. He’d been the one to make the call that you were ready for the highway, promising you a million times that it’d be fine despite your apprehension, but as soon as you’d gotten on the entrance ramp his confidence had seemed to flee him—which isn’t ideal, because he was the only one of you that had any to begin with. 

“Eddie.” Your voice pitches, knuckles white on the steering wheel. “The car behind me is getting really close.” 

“He’ll go around us,” your boyfriend says without opening his eyes. He takes a breath, cracks an eyelid. “You’ve got it, you’re good. We’re all good. Everything is fine and dandy.” 

You wonder how much of this is for you. 

You stay there for a while, eyes volleying between your mirrors and the speedometer, until you come upon a car in front of you that can’t be going more than forty. You take your foot off the gas, coasting down to its speed.  

“Go around him,” Eddie instructs.

You glance into the next lane, just as a car whooshes past your window. “I can’t,” you say, voice going high. 

“You can do it,” he says, though his hand curls around the handlebar above his window. “Just look for an opening, speed up, and change lanes.” 

You take a few quick breaths before pushing down on the gas, head whipping around to check your blind spot before you signal and move over. Another car tries to switch lanes at the same time, blaring their horn at you, and you shriek and swerve back into your lane, slamming on the brakes to avoid rear-ending the slow car in front of you. 

“Jesus Hendrix Christ,” Eddie hisses. Then, with more pep, “Doing great, baby!” 

“I can’t do this!” 

“You don’t really have a choice at this point!” 

“What?” 

“I mean, yeah you can!” Your boyfriend’s nearly wheezing, head on a swivel as he keeps track of the cars around you. “You’re doing awesome.”

“I almost hit someone!” you remind him, voice starting to waver as panicked tears clog your throat. 

“Not your fault.” His hand wraps around your thigh, squeezing so the cool metal of his rings bites into your skin. “He didn’t see you either, he was just being a dick about it. You acted fast, which—which is the best thing you could’ve done.” 

Your lip wobbles. “Are you sure?” 

“I’m sure as shit, baby. Take a breath, okay? Panicking makes you a bad driver.” 

“Pretty sure I already am a bad driver,” you say, but do your best to fill your lungs anyway. 

“Nah, you’re the best I know.” Eddie’s hand rubs your thigh soothingly, at odds with the tension in his voice. “Not including myself, obviously. But it’s fine, you’re learning.” 

You want desperately to take his hand but can’t risk taking one off the wheel. You glance in your rear view mirror, watching cars go around you and the clunker barely trudging along in front of you. 

You chew your lip. “Can we be done? I want to get off.” 

You think you hear a relieved sigh. “Sure, if that’s what you want,” he says. “Take this next exit.” 

Eddie talks you through decelerating back onto the frontage road, helping you change lanes until you start to slow down in the shoulder. 

“Don’t pull over here,” he tells you. “There’s a parking lot just after this light.” 

You shake your head. “Nope, I’m done. I’m pulling over.” 

“But you can’t just—wait, you’ve gotta—” Eddie grimaces as the car tilts, one wheel going up onto the curb. “Okay. Okay, good job.” 

“Fuck.” You heave a sigh and move the gearshift while your boyfriend bends to kiss the dashboard, murmuring apologies to his van. “I think I need to start driving in something else, Eds. This van is too hard to learn in.” 

“Hey, don’t talk about her like that.” He caresses the dashboard lovingly. “I don’t know what you’re talking about, you were…you had a learning experience. Plus, once you can drive her, you can drive anything.” 

“I don’t know.” You lift your foot from the brake, moving to hug your knee to your chest. “I think maybe—” 

“Shit,” Eddie says as the van starts to roll backward. “Shit, shit, baby, the gearshift!” 

You gasp, setting your foot back on the brake so Eddie can shift the van into park. 

“Oh my god.” You drop your head into your hands, breathing heavily. “I can’t even park!” 

“It’s—” Eddie’s voice is high, but he clears his throat. “It’s okay, that could happen to anyone. Reverse is, like, right next to park, so…it’s an easy mistake, I guess.” 

“I don’t want to drive anymore,” you groan. 

“Hey,” he says. “Hey, come here.” 

He reaches over and starts to grab for you, but you stop him, lifting your foot from the brake hesitantly. Eddie does you the courtesy of not making fun of you, and when the van doesn’t move you clamber into his lap, setting your chin on his shoulder while his big palms rove your back. 

“You’re not so bad,” he says, hair tickling your face as he tilts his head to accommodate you. “It just takes practice. Same for everybody. You want to be able to drive yourself around someday, right?” 

You make a noncommittal sound. “Maybe you can just take me wherever I need to go.” 

Eddie laughs, hand sliding down your back to pinch your waist. “I’m not available for a cab service at the moment, sweet thing.” 

“Mean.” 

“You like it when I’m mean to you,” he reminds you. 

You wonder if he can feel your cheek heating against his neck. “Only sometimes.” 

He huffs amusedly. Wraps a hand around either side of your rib cage, easing you back until he can see you. “You’ll get there,” he says. “We’ve just gotta keep practicing.” 

You gnaw on your lip, exhaling through your nose. “Yeah, okay. But can we stay on the ground for now? I don’t think I’m ready for the highway.” 

The humor saps from Eddie’s expression. “Yeah,” he agrees, “no more highways for a while.”

[yukidragon]

Sunny Day Jack - Drunk Headcanons

First ramble of the new year. Whoo! I was considering what would be fitting, then I wound up thinking about all the drinking that happens at New Years’ parties and figured, why not go with some drunken headcanons?

Content warning: this post contains talk of drinking, negative experiences with drinking, being drunk, and maybe some smut as well.

Talking about drunk headcanons also gives me the excuse to break out the drunk Jack art drawn by the ever awesome Sauce, since it’s very relevant. Credit as always goes to them for their amazing work and for being cool with me using their art in my rambles about the awesome characters they’ve created.

Isn’t Jack such a cute drunk? Funny how he’s only drunk when MC is though… possibly. After all, pictures like these don’t technically count as canon unless they’re in the game or on one of the official Sunny Day Jack pages, which you can find conveniently listed here.

Speaking of, why not consider supporting the SnaccPop Studios Patreon? If you sign up, you’ll get to see all sorts of exclusive pieces of art and sneak peeks at the lore, as well as amazing audio dramas. It’s well worth joining, in my humble opinion. Just remember to please not share anything privately posted on the patreon. Reposting paid content only hurts the team.

Anyway, back to the topic of drunk Jack, and specifically the teaser art by Sauce that may or may not be canon still.

I’ve talked about this picture before, particularly what it suggests for Jack’s powers, how it probably means he can be influenced by MC’s hormones, and how much he might be affected by MC’s state of being and vice-versa. To summarize, I believe that Jack and MC can sense how the other is feeling, both physically and emotionally, but it’s not quite as strong as the other is experiencing it, and it can be blocked out or minimized. I’ve alluded to it in Sunshine in Hell, as well as some of my short stories, especially the one where Alice is in a lot of pain.

So, as this picture suggests, if MC gets drunk, Jack does too. It makes me wonder though if he broke character and drank alcohol, he could be the one to get both of them drunk instead? The possibilities of these implications, canon to the game or not, are quite intriguing.

Of course, we can’t talk about drunk headcanons without considering what kind of drunk Jack and the rest of the crew might be. As they say, drunk words are sober thoughts, and alcohol does lower inhibitions…

Naturally, it’s kind of dangerous for a yandere character to be drunk. Self-control would be lessened, if not thrown out the window entirely if he’s totally hammered. I think Jack would be a clingy sort of drunk, hanging off his sunshine, shamelessly needing their warmth and reassurance that they love him and need him just as badly. He’s also a possessive and protective drunk, not wanting anyone else near MC. He’d probably insist on carrying them around everywhere even while he’s stumbling, though it’d take one near fall for him to decide that sitting with them in his lap is the better option. He needs to keep them safe, keep them close.

If you think Jack can be clingy normally, he is like glue when drunk, or at least I think so. Even if he was dutifully staying home like MC wanted them, once the drinks hit him through their connection, he’s got to be with them, no matter where they are. Suddenly there’s a clown in the club or party checking to see if they’re okay and wanting to take them home, hanging off them like a big warm blanket while trying to convince them to go and keep them safe from anyone that might take advantage of them.

Once agreeing to leave, Jack would probably forget about any implications or issues that might arise from carrying MC in a crowd of people. Hopefully no one is sober enough to film anything that might complicate things when he’s whisking MC away off into the night. He’s certainly not in any state to really consider consequences.

Well, maybe if they’re lucky any such videos would be assumed to be hoaxes. There’s certainly no shortage of fake “ghost” videos online. Maybe Shaun could use it to promote an upcoming movie…

Of course, if the relationship between MC and Jack is rocky, his desperation is cranked up while drunk. He needs them so, so badly.

Worse, if MC is getting physical with someone else, showing them love instead of him… Jack might not be able to hold back his yandere impulses to make sure that no one steals his sunshine away. He’d certainly have a lot of work to do once sober to convince his sunshine that he was just protecting them from being taken advantage of while drunk, especially if things escalated to outright violence. The level of intoxication, and the intensity of the moment would likely decide how far things might spiral.

Of course, you know me and how much of a sucker I am for my OTP being happy, so let’s swing back around to the fluffier extreme. If MC and Jack are in a relationship, that’s when Jack is drunkenly telling them how much he loves them, and that they should just go home together. There’s not even a token resistance to hold back his true feelings for them. He’s already got them whisked up in his arms, kissing and murmuring sweet words of love. MC is going to have a pretty hard time talking Jack into letting them stay, especially when they’d be more drunk than he is.

Naturally, the type of drunk MC becomes would affect things. Since there are way too many variables there, let’s use that as a segue to how my MC Alice is like when drunk. She’s not the biggest fan of alcohol, disliking beer, and only drinking sweet flavored mixed drinks socially before the breakup with Ian. Even then, it was rare that she got drunk at all.

After the breakup, the idea of drinking scares Alice, especially to the point of being drunk. She almost died after all. As such, the only way she’s getting sloshed in the present day is if she’s unaware that what she’s consuming has alcohol in it until it’s too late.

It’s kind of a shame, as Alice is a giggly, affectionate drunk. She stops caring about people around them and just wants to cling to her partner, giggling between kisses, occasionally gnawing on them or licking them playfully and saying silly things. Ian got quite embarrassed by how overly affectionate she was the few times she got tipsy when they were out with friends, though he certainly enjoyed the attention.

Needless to say, when Alice got drunk after finding out Ian cheated, she was anything but giggly or affectionate. Though the less said about that the better for now. Let’s keep this to fun headcanons, shall we?

Alice is also affectionate to her friends when drunk, telling them that she loves them, giving big hugs and saying what she loves about them. It was very hard on Shaun’s heart the one time he was around when Alice was drunk. She glomped onto him and told him she loved him soooooooooooo much while giggling happily~!

Of course, it was cut into by Ian crying because he was also drunk and thus more sensitive to things, so Alice went over to reassure him that she loved him mostest of all. It was a hard night for Shaun to be the sober driver.

Jack would sadly not get to experience this side of Alice. At least, not under normal circumstances. Knowing she doesn’t drink and isn’t comfortable even drinking a little bit, the moment he felt her get drunk, his protective instincts would kick into overdrive. What if someone spiked her drink? What if they had awful intentions? Even if he found out it was an innocent mistake, probably even a mixup, he would still be very concerned about her.

Well… until Alice latches onto Jack, squeezing him tight in a big hug as she tells him that she loves him. Oh how his heart would feel ready to burst, especially if they’re not together yet at the time. He longed to hear those words from her for so long… it’s just a shame that she’s saying them while drunk. Still, you better believe that his tipsy butt is going to tell her he loves her too. That would send Alice into a fit of happy giggles as she snuggles into his chest, since, let’s face it, her guilty impulses are on full display and his chest has always felt so nice and soft to cuddle.

Jack would be struggling to hold himself back and retain some sense of sobriety, to not ruin things, but it’s so hard when Alice is being so affectionate with him. Yet, he worries that her love for him isn’t the same as the love he feels for her. This is especially true if she was hugging and loving on other friends when he showed up.

Of course, even while drunk, Alice wouldn’t be open to physical contact with just anybody, only those she trusts. Being touched by someone she doesn’t know/trust would result in her fleeing to her nearest trusted friend/loved one to hide behind them, maybe even insisting they protect herrrr, and telling the person who tried to touch her to go away! Shoo! Shoo!

Naturally, if Alice was drunk while she and Jack were a couple, it would be a very strange sight for anyone else there to see her cuddling up to thin air, kissing, licking, gnawing, etc. It’d be even more outrageous to see her scooped up into the air! Hopefully Shaun isn’t there to see it and have his heart broken further. Though if he was around while Alice was drunk, and he was still sober, he would be getting her to drink water and getting her out of there since he knows she doesn’t want to drink alcohol anymore. So he’d be stepping in to help her out until Jack swooped in to steal Alice away from him… again.

Speaking of Shaun, he strikes me as a giggly drunk as well. Though he turns it more into a performance. He’s talking about stories he knows to anyone who will listen. Or anyone who is not listening, since he’d be drunk off his butt. I’m talking grand gestures, booming voice, passion thrown into it as he cries over touching moments in a movie he saw, or what he was directing. Oh, his actors killed it in the beach scene! He’ll tell you all about it, then get interrupted by a different thought halfway through the story, probably something he thinks will be a good idea for another film that he has to scribble onto a napkin. Of course, it becomes a weird scrawl that’s barely legible and makes no sense, but it was certainly exciting to him in the moment!

Of course, Shaun enjoys a good buzz. It makes him want to purr, so it’s a good tell for when he’s getting tipsy. He’s very responsible when he’s the designated sober person, but when he’s ready to cut loose, he’s a tomcat ready to play!

While Shaun is a more bubbly and fun drunk, I think that Ian is the opposite. When he has a nice buzz, he feels pretty good, but when it goes too far and he starts getting drunk… that’s when everything goes downhill. This cropped picture drawn by Sauce makes me think that when Ian gets drunk, that’s when his guilt and self-loathing hits him hard.

Poor guy needs therapy. Also, if you want to see the full picture, which is very NSFW, check it out over on Sauce’s twitter. While you’re there, send them some love for all their amazing art and characters!

I think Ian needs constant reassurance while drunk, especially from his partner. He clings to MC and feels lonely even if they’re a foot away from him. He cries at the drop of a hat, even for silly things like how tragic that is that snakes don’t have legs. Why don't they have legs? It's unfair! He’s going to be needing help not to get dehydrated from all the crying and the alcohol, and his hangover the next day is a bitch.

Needless to say, when Ian and Alice were drunk together, it was a very mushy scene. Ian would be down on himself, then Alice would smoosh his cheeks and tell him to listen to her because he is a prince. Prince Charming! No one else is better. That’d get the waterworks going, and he’d cling to her, crying. She would then start kissing his tears away.

I figure this too also happened when Shaun was around because I’m very mean with the guy and his unrequited crush. Sorry, Shaun, but it’s just too much fun teasing you, haha. Don’t worry though, he’s going to find his own happy ending in Sunshine in Hell with a partner or two who love him more than anything else in the world. Eventually.

On that note, let’s move on to the final love interest, Nick. Nick strikes me as someone who is very smooth when tipsy, but an absolute mess when sloshed. The filter is gone. He’s got opinions, and by God is he going to give them, even if they don’t really make sense. He especially has strong opinions about bad BDSM. That popular book series they made a movie about called, what was it again, 500 shades of fucked up or something? That is not BDSM. That’s abuse pretending to be BDSM. Do you have any idea what that mess has done to the BDSM community and how many people have done stupid things because of it? And don’t get him started on what an awful idea it is to tie someone up with rope from a hardware store of all places!

I see Nick as the type to start recording himself once his inhibitions are dropped. The people need to know! His thoughts have to get out there! His followers need to know the truth! This is why he makes sure that he has to put in several passwords before he can actually upload anything. He learned his lesson that he can’t trust drunk Nick with his socials the hard way. The fans are still making memes and using clips out of context from that embarrassing old video. At least he bounced back from it by joking about it even if inside he’s still dying of mortification.

Speaking of a drunk with complaints, I had the image of Barry really unloading all his grievances when he’s drunk. Fortunately, he knows better than to get sloshed with any of his employees, but if he did, they’d have a hard time escaping from him insisting that he knows what’s wrong with the service industry and customers and how the hell did his latest marketing gimmick fail?! Can’t they see how cute the new mascot is? He paid way too much to the graphic designer! Do you know what artists charge nowadays? It’s highway robbery!

Since we’re going into employees of Yogurtopia, why don’t I touch real quick on the other people on staff who I expanded upon a little in my earliest headcanon posts? Things have changed since then of course, such as the boss having an actual name now. Needless to say, I’m not going with what I came up with for that post, but let’s do a little rapid fire mode with the rest of the employees I want to use for Sunshine in Hell.

Carol is a flirty drunk, which is a big problem if she’s actually in a committed relationship at the time and the person she’s flirting with isn’t her partner. Though I’m sure she’d give her partner permission ahead of time to have sloppy drunken makeouts and sex with her.

Liz isn’t really a drinker so much as a stoner. Though if drunk they would be doodling on napkins and finding the ceiling tiles fascinating.

Susan is underage and isn’t much for breaking the rules, so it’ll be a few years yet before she’d have to worry about how she’d be as a drunk.

I know I haven’t touched on these characters a lot, but I figured why not expand on them when I can, even in small ways. If nothing else, it should make it easier for me to come up with more ideas of what parts they could play in the bigger picture of Sunshine in Hell.

Speaking of my OCs, why don’t I touch on the rest of the King family while I’m at it?

Mama Lycoris enjoys herself a nice glass of wine with good company, most notably her husband, whose name is still undecided. (I’ve narrowed it down to Eden, Seb, Luan, Yuri, or Heliotrope. Picking character names is hard sometimes.) It’s rare for her to get drunk, but when she does, she seeks out her husband, even if she just lost track of him for being out of sight. She’s the type to do the meme where she’s crying while texting them that she misses them while he was just in the bathroom. Once she finds them, she’s crawling in his lap telling them how much she loves him~

Papa King usually is the sober one at a party, embarrassed by his wife loving on them when she’s tipsy. Sometimes Lycoris pretends to be tipsy just to get him flustered. They do occasionally have a glass for a special occasion, like toasting at his anniversary or a special holiday. When drunk, they’re a sleepy sort of drunk, pretty out of it and just off in his own little happy world. They haven’t yet been drunk before though, or even gotten tipsy, as he drinks very responsibly.

Barbie isn’t one for drinking, even socially. Though that’s probably not surprising considering she’s not a very social person. If she did get drunk though, she’d be a mean drunk, eyeballing anyone who looks at her funny and ready to jump into any excuse to fight. It’s probably a good thing she doesn’t drink!

Though, I suppose if Barbie was drunk around Bo, she’ll probably let her dom side out more, ordering him around and getting a bit rough with him. Good thing Bo is a big strong alpha and can’t get drunk due to being an AI, so he’ll be able to take care of his puppy even when she’s gone a bit feral due to alcohol.

Coraline also doesn’t drink, but that’s because she can’t due to medical reasons. It interferes with her prescription medications, so it’s probably best if she sticks with non-alcoholic beverages. If she did get drunk, however, she would probably be similar to her father, being off in her own little world, looking at things as if they were fascinating. She would probably be very keenly interested in holding Elias’ head and examining his neck stump up close, which I’m sure her poor groom wouldn’t quite be comfortable with. He would have to make sure to redirect her focus elsewhere until she sobered up.

Of course, I can’t just end things there. I haven’t gushed nearly enough about Jack and Alice having some drunk shenanigans in a more specific sort of scenario. It might turn into some writing, or it might not, but it’s my post, and I can ramble on longer about my OTP if I want to.

As I said earlier, Jack would be very concerned upon noticing that he’s starting to get tipsy. At first he would probably be confused as to how lightheaded he is, until he realizes that it’s because of his sunshine’s influence. The immediate order of business after that is to find Alice and check to see if she’s okay. With lower inhibitions, it would be hard for him not to worry that someone spiked her drink or something.

While someone spiking Alice’s drink would make for some interesting drama, and a target for Jack to go yandere on for taking advantage of his sunshine… I think I’ll stick with something more innocent for this post and say that there was a mixup with her drink or Alice was unaware something someone brought at the party’s potluck had a high alcohol content until it was too late.

Though if y’all want me to chase that darker and more dramatic plot bunny of Alice getting her drink spiked by some unscrupulous character, and Jack has to save her, do let me know~ ;3

Back to the lighter scenario. While it is intriguing to imagine how torn Jack would be if Alice is loving on him while they’re not together, and she means tells him she loves him in a clearly platonic way, which wrenches his heart… At the moment, I’m more drawn to how much of a cock block it’d be for him if Alice was getting frisky with her affection and turning Jack on, forcing him to hold back his urges and stay responsible even though what he wants to do is take her and fill her with his love until her legs are too wobbly to allow her to stand anymore. He might be tipsy too, but she’s outright drunk, and he’s not going to take advantage of his sunshine in an inebriated state!

Of course, Jack’s first order of business is to get Alice home. It doesn’t matter if they’re in the middle of a party full of people, he’s carrying his sunshine home. Alice doesn’t protest being scooped up by her boyfriend, just giggling in delight before peppering his cheek and neck with kisses now that she’s in range. She also makes sure to tell Jack how she just loves him so, so, so, so, soooooo much~!

Jack does try to be discreet in getting Alice away from the party. He might be pretty tipsy, and his steps a little unsteady, but he needs to protect his sunshine. He needs to take care of her, be responsible. It’s what he’s there for after all.

It’s just a little hard for Jack to focus on walking straight when Alice keeps nipping at his skin. Her giggling tickles his ear too, and it’s hard for him not to melt when she tells him she loves him and that he tastes so sweet.

Having a hardon would also make it difficult for Jack to focus on walking straight. Poor guy. Alice doesn’t think about what she’s doing as she keeps kissing, licking, and nibbling on him, her hands wandering and squeezing his chest despite him trying to gently redirect her attention. He needs her to stop, since he can’t focus, but at the same time he really wants her to continue.

The first order of business once they get back home is to make sure Alice sobers up with some water and food. By the time they’re home, Jack feels like he’s going to go crazy. Like her drunkenness affected him, his horniness affects her, and those playful affections become more lusty as her inhibitions are lowered and the idea of teasing Jack and making him feel good becomes more and more appealing. Eventually it gets to the point that she’s being much more blatant in her teasing, such as tracing his nipples through his shirt with her fingers. Maybe even copping a feel lower down when they’re at the apartment and teasing him about the bulge in his pants.

Needless to say, Jack would be having a very hard time holding himself back. It’d almost be a relief when Alice abruptly nods off due to the alcohol. Of course, he’d have to give himself some real relief, imagining what it would’ve been like if she had sobered up so they could continue. All the while, he’s also swearing to himself that in the morning - provided Alice wasn’t in pain from a hangover - he was going to pay her back for all the love and affection she showed him tonight in spades.

The next morning, Alice is indeed hungover, though not quite as bad as she would’ve been if Jack didn’t have her eat and drink something last night. Of course, Jack is kind and cheerful, endlessly gentle and supportive of her, giving her some painkillers and making her a nice, mild breakfast. She remembers what she did last night and is too embarrassed to talk about it, just thanking Jack for helping her get home.

Though past the embarrassment, fear would slowly build as Alice woke up more and it sunk in how easy it was for her to accidentally get drunk at the party. It was so easy for her to lose control… for something to happen… Jack picks up on her worries right away and reassures her that he’ll always be there to take care of her and keep her safe. He’ll always protect her and make sure nothing bad happens to her. He made sure she got home safely last night, after all.

Jack won’t ever let Alice suffer through anything as awful as the night Ian broke her heart ever again.

Some reassurance and cuddles goes a long way, and Alice is able to let go of her fear and embarrassment to just appreciate how much Jack cares for her and takes care of her, even when the unexpected happens. She melts into his soft and reassuring kisses that soon turn hot and steamy. Suddenly the breakfast dishes are off the table, and she’s the one getting eaten by her very pent up boyfriend.

You better believe that Jack planned to feed Alice then do the deed with her as soon as possible. The moment she shows that she’s receptive to his affection, he starts enacting all the naughty fantasies that he had while giving himself relief the night before, making sure that Alice is the one being driven crazy this time. He won’t rest until she’s begging for him to make love to her. Repeatedly.

Needless to say, if Alice has work that day, she’s missing it. Jack would’ve turned her phone off after sending a text that she’s sick, just in case. There’s no way Jack is letting Barry cockblock him again. Not after he spent a night getting blueballed by a too sexy sunshine that was too drunk to make love to.

Fortunately, in the light of day and fully sober enough to consent, Jack gets to enjoy every inch of Alice, as well as a nice memory of just how fun and affectionate she gets when her inhibitions are lowered. He also has a goal to strive for, to encourage his sunshine to feel freer with him like that when they’re both fully sober so that they can enjoy every second of their lovemaking.

Well, I think that’s a good place to wrap up these drunken headcanons for now. I hope you enjoyed the silliness. It seemed like a good way to start off the year, and it certainly would be a fun start of the new year for these two!

@channydraws @earthgirlaesthetic @sai-of-the-7-stars @cheriihoney @illary-kore @okamiliqueur

[4rticbolt]

Card DECLINED |Master-List|

Monster Trio+Law x Reader, crack, fluff, modern-au, everyone’s poor.

!Established-Relationship!

Summary: They take you on a date, and their card declines. Head-cannons/Drabble. A/N: Rewritten version! I may or may not have been satisfied with the original—so here you go >:). Word Count: 1,465 words - 364 each

•-•-•-•-••-•-•-•-•-•-•-•-••-•-•-•-•

Luffy

* All of his money? 100% spent on fast-food. He holds a Guinness World Record for the most food eaten—period.

* You’re date’s most likely in a thrift store, having a competition to see who could find the coolest thing. Naturally, Luffy found an item that wasn’t even for sale… and you found something weirdly cheap.

* So, as you placed your trinket of the counter—he offered to pay. Which of course backfired.

“Oh, here—wait! I’ll get that for you.”

“Are you sure? It’s only a few bucks Luffy, I don’t mind.”

“Nope! I pay. My treat.”

* As soon as he checked the card—it didn’t go through. He was incredibly confused, jamming it back in atleast another 20 times.

* “Hey, why’s it not working?! Mr—I think your machines broken!”

* “No… sir, that’s your card. It says insufficient funds...”

* “Huh?”

* It’ll take a moment. Let him process.

* But as soon as it does, he’d apologize and laugh it off. A tad embarrassed, a little pink—but more blaming his card than anything.

* He’d judge it to bits, laughing casually as he slammed it back in his shabby wallet.

* “…Thanks a lot, I was supposed to make a good impression!”

* (As if it was the cards fault. Much less a 10 dollar ring.)

* You’d pay, and he’d go about your date like nothing happened. Which consisted of walking around town, meeting up with friends—getting into trouble, yk— the normal.

* But when you’re distracted—walking up ahead, he’d hit Nami up for a quick Venmo. Which she’d automatically decline.

* So, finding a few crumpled bucks on the ground, he substituted it for something very… Luffy.

* He dragged you into another random store, sneaking off to find something while you were left to your devices.

* Luff ended up getting a cute little hot wheels for free, of course out of pity from the cashier. (Which he was oblivious to.)

* “Is this for your girl?”

* “Shishi, yep! She’s awesome, I just wanted to get her something.”

* (Initiate awkward pause.)

* “Uh-huh.” the cashier slides it back, plopping it in his hand. “For free.”

* “Wait—really?? You’re awesome—thanks, I owe you!”

* “Oh, it’s fine. Just a few bucks.”

* (Money doesn’t have meaning to Luffy. Only actions, kindness, and food.)

* Later, walking you home, he giddily hugged from behind, kissing your cheek with glowing excitement.

* "Here, look at what I got it! Awesome right?”

* “Aww… wait, it’s actually kinda cute.”

* You ended up putting it on your shelf to cherish it.

Zoro:

* Sake and horrible money management was his downfall. He’s minimalistic, but his alcohol sure wasn’t.

* Regardless, you’d think Zoro’s love for booze was a turn off, but he was a responsible drinker and never put you in danger.

* Besides, he didn’t get drunk easy. And on rare occasions he’d ease up into your arms.

* On his date, he’d had taken you out for drinks, and for the first time in awhile he actually paid… though it didn’t go through.

* Much like Luffy—he’d try again, not confused, but out of sheer will it’d work. When the bartender told him there were “insufficient funds,” he’d be in denial, blushing beet red.

* “I don't know what you're talking about, it's gotta be your damn machine..."

* Nope. Not slick. Not at all.

* Royally, he knew he’d fucked up. Because what kinda guy doesn’t pay for the drinks on a date—HE invited them too?!’

* With a casual shrug, you passed the money over—dousing his worries.

* “It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

* Yeah. Zoro knew why he liked you. He was relieved, and ever so grateful—he just didn’t know how to show it.

* “Oi, You didn't have to do that..."

* “I really did, what else were you gonna pay with?”

* An hour or so later, he’d drove you safely home, and the whole thing had been forgotten about. Which was much preferred.

* Zoro wouldn’t pay you back immediately, but when he did… It was in his own sweet chaotic way.

* After work, he’d stopped by your house with dinner. However, you’d just gotten out of the shower in a towel—making him even more flustered.

* (Zoro never did well with thanks.)

* “Hey uh, hi…” his stifled a cough, eyes trailing.

* “Zoro—woah! Hello! What are you doing here?”

* “Yeah—sorry. I know. I didn’t call. I just thought I’d just drop by with dinner, Sanji made extra. And I know you like his cooking.”

* “Oh—that’s… really sweet. Actually, thank you. Would you like to come in? Here, let me just go get dressed—“

* (For the rest of that night, Zoro couldn’t get that image of you out of his mind. Under his calm demeanor, he was worked up more than he’d admit.)

Sanji:

* I physically cannot see this man's card declining, so he’d probably used the wrong one...

* Anyway—for the sake of this head-cannon: he’d taken you out to dinner, enjoying a romantic ocean view… and when it happened. Oh. It happened.

* His freak out would be subtle, but there would be signs. He’d be subconsciously tapping his arm, mind blank with anxiety as the waiter told him it wouldn’t go through.

* “I’m sorry, what?” (He’d be in definite denial.)

* However, as soon as you offered to pay—he’d shut it down. Sanji wouldn’t dare let you pay for this, let alone a dinner he’d taken you too. He spoiled you like no other—so forget asking.

* “No—no, it’s alright sweetheart. I have everything handled.”

* (He didn’t, but he’ll act like he does.)

* Sanji believes in women putting their feet up, so he’d rather search the floors for pennies.

* However, after some reassurance and his inability to pay, he’d give in.

* “Sanji, it’s okay. If it means that much to you, you can just pay me back. Don’t worry.”

* He would worry, and he’d pay you back extra. From bouquets, to chocolates, and a home-made fancy dinner—hed go overboard.

* (But when does he not?)

* You’d would think it was overkill—as it was. But to him, that kinda thing is something he’d do on a daily basis. Any sliver of kindness given, he’d soak up like a sponge and reciprocat it tenfold.

* He was a believer of princess treatment.

* “Mon Amour, thank you for the other night. And thank you for joining me for dinner, it meant the world.“

* “I am so very lucky to have you, Mon chéri—here, I got you these…”

* (Cue the nosy neighbor watching him kneel in-front of you like he’s proposing.)

* Newsflash, he’s not. He just has a big heart.

* “Oh—Sanji, thank you… this is uh—a lot. Not complaining, I love it, I just—I wasn’t expecting you tonight—“

* (You’d be momentarily stunned, because what kinda guy does this? You’re not complaining, but you’re definitely cautious.)

Law:

* Law’s a somewhat responsible colledge student who’s learning to be a surgeon, so this? Would be detrimental to his ego and dignity.

* This happened once, and only once. NEVER again.

* He’s a total fanboy, and is a sucker for action figures + comics and mangas—which isn’t cheap. So… you can assume where this is going.

* It was the end of semester, and he took you out to lunch unaware of the tuition fees that clashed with a figurine he bought.

* He took you out for lunch, finally having some free time, but realizing too late what had happened.

* The waiter had handed him back his card and he stilled, before telling them to try it again. It didn’t make a difference, and the chick told him flat out he needed a different form of payment…

* Law would loathe the moment, feeling second-hand embarrassment for miles.

* However, as you overheard and offered to pay—just happy to be there with him… his expression darkened. Broodingly.

“It’s alright. I have cash.” Law’s voice was strained, grumbling. Wishing it happened any other time than this.

* He would pay, and you would would up going to his house to hang out; binge watching horror movies… which he was strangely interested in.

* Yet you were absolutely terrified of, much to his amusement. He cracked a smile watching you hide in his shoulder as the movie progressed, too afraid of the rising tension.

* (You ended up watching some stupid cartoon to the brighten the night)

* Ultimately, Law would forever remember that date, watching his guilty spending habits with a sour expression.

* The possibility of that happening again kept him up at night.

* It would stick with him, but what lingered more was your unhesitant reaction. He hadn’t seen you that happy in awhile, even something as simple at lunch.

* As you lay in his arms, his mind would travel over these things—tenderly brushing your hair back.

* Yes, he was a busy person, but he could always make time. Every minute with you mattered, and he missed you just as much in moments like these.

[swampstew]

You Picked Dare

Summary: Why the hell would you play truth or dare with a bunch of pirates? Warnings: nsfw but mostly language and suggestive content, no actual smut, Kid Pirates being the Kid Pirates. Killer x Female reader x Kid

Inspired by the mega awesome @magnuspirate who did this delighful tease of two hunky hunks hunking around

Dare.

Dare. 

Dare.

Your bold statement had come out smug and confident, echoing in your head with a twinge of regret.

The Dare was to go into the hot springs and take a photo – of Killer and your Captain. Damn the others for knowing your kryptonite.

There was an opt-out option – to clean the communal bathrooms for a month. No fucking way.

As you walked through the island you took nervous hits of your blunt to ease the butterflies in your stomach. All you had to do was take a picture. There were no restrictions, you could be seen or hidden, as long as you got a photo of them that was all you needed to escape this torturous dare disguised as a group bonding activity.

Fuck the crew! You loved them but also fuck them. You were gonna get them back.

About a hundred yards away from the hot spring you took a final drag and snuffed out the remaining blunt. Giving yourself an internal pep talk as you took each step.

‘Position self behind a bush. Snap a picture. Sneak away and then run like the devil’s on my heels.’

Picturing your devil of a captain, your stomach coiled with anxiousness. Oh how you wished you could light up the roach.

Creeping between the foliage, you could hear Kid and Killer talking to each other in relaxed conversation. They didn’t appear to notice you, silently cursing as you realized they were still too far to take a photo.

Tip toeing on the patches of grass, you could make out their conversation more clearly.

“Ya ever think about sleeping with someone on the crew?” Kid suddenly asked Killer. You nearly fell over yourself when you heard the statement.

“Once in a while, rarely act on it though. You?” Killer mused.

“All the time.”

“Horn dog,” Killer scoffed.

“Can ya blame me? All our girls are hot as fuck.”

“Yeah, but I also see most of them as sisters…”

“You’re so pure,” Kid laughed. “Yeah they’re family, but they’re also not. I’m not saying I’d do anything about it either but it’s tempting some times.”

You felt as if you weren’t breathing, skillfully crawling around the shrubs eager to hear and see more, as silent as the dead. One breath and they were sure to discover you.

“Ahh is this about Y/N again?”

Time stopped. Your heart stopped. You didn’t dare move.

“Could be,” there was a tilt in Kid’s voice. “Don’t pretend you don’t think about her and what it could be like.”

“You’re being vulgar, which isn’t surprising, but what do you expect me to say? ‘Sure Kid I’ll bow out from another person of interest to give you the advantage as your friend.’” Killer legitimately sounded a little mad. Well like, personal hurt mad, not crazy mad which he was every single second.

“I’m a man with needs too. And I LIKE her.”

You wished to be a small lizard so you could watch them argue about you. Maybe the blunt was laced with something – wouldn’t put it past your crew to be honest.

Low growling preceded a laugh, and you could hear the sound of water splashing. Oh to the gods to be a fish in that spring.

“Alright fair enough. Would it make you feel better if we do it together? It’d be her choice who she’d choose no matter what, no hurt fee fees over it. Maybe if we come at her with a multi-partner thing, 50/50 she agrees?”

“Kid!”

“60/40?”

“Stop it.”

“Damn 10/90?”

More splashing of water, waves of it crashing over your coverage and wetting your clothes. Practicing your breathing exercises, you mentally pumped yourself up to get it over with. One snap and bam, you’re gone.

“What if we show her our dicks first?”

“KID!”

“Whadd’ya say Y/N? Wanna check the goods before you sample them?” Kid couldn’t hold back his laughter.

Gods be damned. They all sucked.

Gathering the last ounce of dignity and lighting your roach, you jumped out from behind the foliage with your camera, looking to the side as you snapped the picture. Whether is was worthy enough to pass was no longer your priority.

“IT WAS A DARE!!!!” you screeched as your turned on your heel and bolted. You poor thing, you didn’t make it past 1 yard.

“Oh you’re not going anywhere, Y/N,” Kid taunted as Killer wrapped his arms around you and picked you up. His towel becoming loose and distressed from your struggling. Bringing you back to the hot spring.

Taking the camera, Kid tossed it in the water with the smuggest face a motherfucker could make.

“We showed you ours, now we dare you to show yours.”

[loganofthenorth]

Every time I think about Mulan, I get obsessed with how awesome these three are. So I’mma take a few minutes to rant about it.

This three good balls, bad asses, loveable idiots. They’re fricken adorable and I love them. And like, as a kid, I used to not understand how they became friends with Mulan. I thought they were sexist assholes that only trusted her because, well, you know, she saved China.

But I analyzed the movie as an adult, and honestly? I think they knew Mulan was a girl the whole time, and just kinda, accepted it. Still treated her like one of the guys, wanted to see how long she could keep this up for. Yao and Ling most certainly bet on it while Chien-po was probably like: “Shouldn’t we just… tell her we know so she has people to trust?” And the other two were like: Nah this is funny.

I also think Ling and Chien-Po knew instantly since Yao was too mad to be like: Huh… hmm… something’s off here.

They probably told him later. Like:

Chien-Po: You know, it isn’t nice to hit a lady.

Yao: Wow, didn’t think you had it in ya to be such an ass. I mean, he’s a wimp but sheesh.

Ling: *falling over laughing*

Yao: What the hell’s his problem?

Chien-Po: *whispering* I mean and actual lady, Yao.

Ling: And no one tells! Got it? No telling anyone else. Only us three know. I wanna see how long this goes on for.

Chien-Po: Also… They’ll kill her if they find out, and… She’s our friend now.

Yao: Friend’s a strong word… But sure, I’ll keep it to myself. Besides, only I’m allowed to kill them now.

So yeah, when they later heard that Mulan was alone in the bath pond thing, it was too good an opportunity to miss. I don’t think these himbos even considered how weird it was. They were too distracted with how fricken hilarious it’d be.

I mean

Come on

That smug smile and Chien-Po’s: This is fine.

They know exactly what they’re doing.

Then with ‘A Girl Worth Fighting For’, Ling brings up the song to cheer everyone up because they’re sore, didn’t choose to go to war, and need something, anything to keep them going. Then once Mulan’s line comes up it’s like: “Oh, right. Forgot about that. Whelp, time to continue messing with her.”

Like: Ight, guys. Whatever she says, probably describing herself. So, whatever she says, say Nah. It’s funny.

The main thing that sent me on this tangent, was this scene

Their shock, their surprise, this reaction isn’t an: “Oh shit, we trained/hung out with/bathed/etc with a girl.” Reaction.

This is a: “Shit they caught her and now they’re gonna kill our friend!” Reaction.

Which, yeah, of course it would be. They have their priorities checked out.

However

If memory serves me right there was no hesitation

There was also no hesitation to trust her when no one else would

Because they didn’t have the feeling of betrayal Shane had for being lied to

And they were totally down to dress in drag

They really just couldn’t care less about Mulan being a girl

And I love them for that

This tis the end of my tangent. I love these three gentlebros