#it’s late I’m feeling confident enough to share on my blog l | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yeolmae-s · 3 years

Text

a chanbaek analysis from a veteran exo-l (part 2)

CLICK HERE TO READ PART ONE

Writing this was a bit harder in comparison to the first part, because I wanted to organize things into a neat timeline, but I ended up not having enough patience for it lol specially because both of ChanBaek's main archive blogs seem to have deleted their pages documenting each date of EXO's early years. Therefore I apologize in advance if this part is a bit more messy. Also, please don't forget that all of this is my opinion and I don't mean for any of it to be taken as truth!

I kind of want to jump from MAMA era directly into Wolf era, since we don't really have a lot of cover regarding their debut phase besides Chanyeol's overeagerness and Baekhyun's awkwardness towards it, so to sum it up, I felt as if Chanyeol was more confident and consistent on what he thought an idol should act like, while Baekhyun (sweet, innocent Baekhyun who was a trainee for less than a year!) was still unsure on how to act on camera.

On the few early variety shows/interviews EXO appeared on, the members always pointed out how funny Baekhyun was, how good he'd be at variety and at doing imitations, but he never really lived up to all the praise on camera, although off of it, he most likely was as good as his members claimed.

He was a bit stiff on his early days in comparison to what we see today, and that's normal, I guess, since he debuted really quickly, but when you compare him to Chanyeol the contrast is so interesting, because the latter was able to latch on to a persona as soon as the public gave him one, while to me, Baekhyun was still doubtful regarding what to put on display. In the end, deep inside, Baekhyun is a private person, and was even more so when he wasn't confident enough to talk to fans like he does today.

Once again, I’m sorry for not being able to upload the gifs directly into the post, so I’ll just link them like I did on my last one.

This is another one of the moments where Baek appears to tell Chanyeol to just. Hold on for a bit.

There's another one similar to this where Chanyeol does the same thing (try to whisper on Baekhyun's ear) and Baekhyun fake laughs and stares at a fan's camera right after. Then, his expression just goes blank. It's really interesting to watch because you can just see the gears spinning on Chanyeol's brain as he stares at Baekhyun for a second and clearly thinks alright, fanservice time, and leans in to whisper something: it happens so fast you just know it wasn't genuine whispering, just a playful interaction for the fans, and Baekhyun's direct stare to the camera as soon as it happens just confirms this for me.

1: Chanyeol spots his target.

2: He’s really thinking this through.

3: Baek's in a perfect position for whispering-time, so he leans in and does his thing.

4: Baekhyun laughs.

5: And stares directly at a fan's camera.

6: Immediately regrets his life choices. Chanyeol looks pleased.

It's actually better to watch the whole thing, so I'll leave it here. (starts on 0:28!)

(Random note: on this date EXO perfomed a cover of H.O.T's We Are The Future, and I feel like a lot of new EXO-Ls have not seem it and I adore this performance, so I'll link it here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r1-z4s3fdgo)

Now let's jump on to Wolf era, shall we?

Wolf era

I can't help but laugh when I think about how wild 2013 was for both EXO and EXO-Ls. They had their first hit song (which was Growl, not Wolf) the fandom grew considerably, shippers where just discovering the cute ISAC moments between "BaekYeol" and "HunHan"... Or at least that's how everyone remembers most of what happened during that year.

Are we forgetting the rumoured ChanBaek fight?

Considering their past interactions on airports, SMTOWN concerts, ISAC and other events, ChanBaek was now widely known to be close to each other. Baekhyun even said Chanyeol was the one who made him open up, and both of them mentioned feeling this "connection" to each other as soon as they met (although jokingly).

After Mama, the fandom was content-less for a considerable period of time, and what most people did was sharing around old performances and repeat overused memes. I think that in every fandom there is a period where fans establish their main inside jokes and basically just get together to create a collective line of thought for perceiving their idols. That being said, one of the most well established facts in the fandom was that Chanyeol and Baekhyun were close. That was a fact.But then Wolf came, and they suddenly were not.

This gif is a good example of how awkward their interactions were. Not even my delusional shipping brain in 2013 was able to come up with an explanation for it.

They simply did not acknowledge each other at all, and Chanyeol appeared to be closer to Kyungsoo (I think Baekhyun interacted a lot with Tao, but that may have been during the Growl era, not Wolf. As I said before, I'm a Chanyeol stan guys, sorry lmao).

Point is, these two boys who seemed to be best friends suddenly were clearly distant from one another.

What added fuel to the fire of the rumours was their appearance on Sukira, a radio show, where Sehun cried because the members sometimes had fights. Here's a fanacc:

[130530] EXO at Sukira

Sehun cried because the members sometimes fight.

Sehun: "Let's be loyal to each other, don't fight, and go until the end"

D.O: "We've been under a lot of stress lately because of the comeback, so I wish we won't fight in the future and do our best"

Here's a video cut of this part of their interview.

I think this ask on lets-talk-baekyeol, a popular ChanBaek analysis blog from back in the day, shows how curious a lot of fans were.

What happened back then?

There's really no answer for that. On my opinion, not even Chanyeol or Baekhyun could give us a concrete answer on it, because I don't think an actual fight happened. For me, it was most likely a personality clash, a disagreement that probably wasn't even voiced out loud, just both of them noticing how uncomfortable things got, if Baekhyun's reactions to Chanyeol's fanservice is any indication. I somehow doubt there was a specific episode that created this distance between them, specially because during Growl, they went back to being friends, although not as touchy on camera as before, as if one of them had established their limits (oh, I wonder who!), but I still have this feeling that all of this was unspoken, because unspoken things seem to be a pattern on ChanBaek's relationship (something I'll touch on later, hopefully).

But it was during Growl era that I noticed something else about Baekhyun.

Wolf era

EXO'S Showtime was a such a gift. I recommend reading lets-talk-baekyeol's blog for this. I don't really agree with everything they say they do present a lot of relevant points. I may repeat them here, since I noticed them myself as well, but credits for them nonetheless.

I remember finding the lack of ChanBaek interactions during the episodes really dissappointing, but considering the Wolf Era drought, this was better than nothing.

My 13 year old self was devastated when Baekhyun appeared so quiet during Chanyeol's birthday episode, and during a recent rewatch of it, I think realized why.

Baekhyun doesn't like superficial things. It's not that Chanyeol is insincere, but he's just better than Baekhyun is at handling people pleasing, even when he doesn't really mean what's he saying/doing. The Chanyeol birthday episode was heavily centered on Chanyeol's random admiration for Kai, which I think we can all agree that it was a little bit scripted or a really spur of the moment thing that they just ran along with and oh man. Baekhyun did not want to be part of it.

During ChanKai's hug, this is what he looked like on the background, and the poor boy even refused to eat cake. He's just in the back, which is weird, because he's such a talkative person and Chanyeol is one of his closest friends. The only moment where he seems to be genuinely comfortable is when Chanyeol blows the candle and it's really cute. To me, it seems that he was kind of embarrassed to witness so much acting from everyone else and was unable to participate because he struggles with things like this, but the moment Chanyeol blows his candles to comemorate his birthday seems sincere enough for him to fondly smile.

This ties in so well with everything from Mama Era. He's just unable to keep acting/people pleasing on the same easy way that Chanyeol does, but this time he's not as nervous about it as he was on his earlier-early days, where he probably felt pressured to actually do stuff. Now he just doesn't do **it, he just doesn't do something that he dislikes doing, and that sadly creates a distance between them on camera and probably on a deeper level in their relationship as well, because both are just realizing how different their perceptions over their jobs is.

There's also this moment that the mods on lets-talk-baekyeol pointed out.

On the Christmas episode, when the members leave the couch to go get their presents, Chanyeol stays seated while Baekhyun gets up to fetch his. This is the sitting arrangement before (almost) everyone got up:

But when Baekhyun comes back, there's free space next to Chanyeol, however he's hesitant to sit by his side. He actually hesitates and doesn't sit down. Jongdae even gives him a little push right after.

Baek just seems hesitant to do things on camera, to interact with Chanyeol in front of an audience. For this moment, I feel like he's afraid to sit next to Chanyeol and end up having to over act. It's not that Chanyeol himself makes him uncomfortable, but the image of the friendship that they ended up creating for fans demands a lot from him.

And when I say hesitant to do things on camera, I really do mean it, because when Baekhyun thinks he is not being recorded/seen, here's what he does:

Here and here.

Their relationship clearly changed, and I think the reason for it is actually simple: both of them were under the impression that they were compatible with each other when they actually were not. Their personalities are extremely different, even if the way they present themselves is sometimes similar. Wolf and Growl era was our way, as fans, of watching them navigate around each other and finding out how their relationship was supposed to work.

And you know what's nice about that? The members watched all of it unfold. Their reactions to some of ChanBaek's interaction is a gold mine when it comes to analyzing them, because they clearly know, just as we do, that their relationship is kind of complicated. But I want to talk about it on the next part.

I am sorry for cutting this off again! I don't know if the next part is going to be the last, because after Growl there's Overdose and we all know what happened on 2014 [coughs] dating scandal [coughs] god help me I don't want to talk about it [coughs] so there's a lot to uncover and I need time to organize stuff.

Thank you for reading!

#chanbaek #baekyeol #baekhyun #chanyeol #park chanyeol #byun baekhyun #exo #kpop

93 notes · View notes

isthisthingeven0n · 4 years

Text

hear you : a.h

after celebrating your promotion with hotch, it tragically ends in an accident with you hospitalised and comatose. yet, somehow you can hear everyone around you, wishing for you to wake up. (1.9k)

all my links

hear you / every word

(everything on my blog is my own writing. if it is shared on another page or website know it hasn’t been approved me unless specified. all rights reserved. - i have to start doing this as I had some shit on my other blog with plagiarism)

DO NOT STEAL MY WORK - IT IS ALL MY OWN WRITING

Everything that night occurred in an instant. No one had time to change what happened, even if you wished the events had happened in a different order.

If you hadn’t left the restaurant first and walked ahead whilst Hotch admired the fleeting moment. You were laughing giddily as you turned to face him, his arms were crossed over his chest as you danced, still joyful after celebrating your promotion. Perhaps if he caught up to you it would’ve been someone else lying on the ground.

Yet, as you lie on the ground, life draining from your gaze you can’t help but wonder; what if?

The events that lead to you strapped to a hospital bed lifelessly could have all been avoided. If the driver hadn’t drunk away his sorrows before picking up his children, families would still be together and one less hospital bed would be filled.

All you can hear is the monotone beeping of your heart monitor. The stench of antibacterial sprays and gels embed themselves into your nostrils alongside the fragrant flowers from Garcia that litter your private room. But out of everything in your environment, there’s one thing you’re still waiting on; to hear him, to hear Hotch by your side.

What you’re currently certain of is that you’re asleep, comatose. Yet, you can hear everything. This was the sort of thing you’d witnessed happen in TV shows, and you’ve listened to Spencer sitting beside you, explaining to Penelope that there have been no claims of comatose patients hearing voices. How they can hear movements or faint sounds, but no details of conversations. All you can do is wait whilst you remain trapped in your own thoughts, unable to react to anything said.

Your daily routine since being ‘awake’ is being checked multiple times a day by various Doctors and Nursers. They’re very caring as they monitor your heart rate, brain waves, temperature and your comfort levels. You listen to them report technical jargon to one another, and now you wish you paid more attention to Spencer last week after he visited his old Doctor.

Thankfully, you’re allowed to have visitors which makes all the difference- even if they are oblivious to the impact they’re making.

The first person to visit you tends to be Garcia, you can hear the urgency in her footsteps as her heels click against the lament flooring. She sits with you for a while before work, telling you about how Morgan keeps singing out of tune whilst she is on the phone to him. You wish you could laugh at the little things she describes, hearing about your family try and carry on without you.

Spencer stops by after work with JJ. You can hear how his voice cracks when he sits beside you, JJ on your other side as she rests her hand on yours. Spencer recites facts about comatose patients and if often interrupted by JJ with some happier news about Henry and describes the drawing she brought. You wish you could see it, feel the textures of the paint and cotton he used.

Yet, as much as you love your family, he still hasn’t been.

“Hey, baby girl.” You hear Morgan walk over toward you, pulling the ancient chair out as it squeaks against the floor. “Garcia tells me you’ve been on your own all day,” He begins and you internally chuckle. “and we can’t have that so I thought you’d love nothing more than your best man to come on by.” Morgan nudges your hand playfully and laughs to himself.

You’re desperate to laugh along, joke back like old times, tell him how much Penelope has been going on about their phone conversations and the workplace issues that have arisen.

“I know you haven’t seen him yet,” Morgan’s tone changes, the light-heartedness has dropped. “but he has been trying, trust me, we see it every day.” A sigh follows from him, and Morgan drops his head in his hands, thankful you haven’t had to witness the state Hotch has been getting himself into.

“He tries every day to come and see you, baby girl. He, he makes it to the entrance of the hospital and just,” Morgan knows exactly what it is, but he doesn’t want to tell you.

Sometimes, the silence is enough for you to figure it out. ‘It isn’t his fault.’ You want to yell out, scream at the top of your lungs, but you remain motionless, simply listening.

Hotch enters the hospital every day since the accident. He came in with you, running by your side as you were wheeled straight into surgery. He stood still as the doors slammed in front of him, taking you out of his sight.

“But erm, we found out about the guy who caused this. His name was Robert Kingshill.” Morgan starts, unaware that both Penelope and Spencer have already explained the details to you. You home in and out of Morgan’s explanation about how Robert was an abusive husband, his children both under 5 years. “He died on arrival.”

‘And no one will miss him.’

“Sorry to interrupt,” A new voice chimes in, one of the nurses who has been seeing to you; Savannah. She’s sweet, attentive and engages with your family. “I just have to check her vitals, I’ll be a few minutes at most.”

“Of course, do you want me to step out?” Morgan asks, his voice softening after he clears his throat. You can almost picture him sitting up straighter, flashing that signature Derek Morgan smirk.

“It’s okay, are we still on for dinner tonight?” Savannah asks, catching you completely off guard as your heart rate spikes. “Shit.” She mutters, watching as your heart rate relaxes once more, back to a normal pace.

“What was that?” Morgan speaks up, concern lacing his tone.

Savannah remains silent for a moment, too long for your liking. “Just a spike, they can happen now and then.” She brushes it off and steps out of the room, leaving Morgan with you alone once more.

“Do you think she can hear us?” Garcia asks as her hand remains in yours, holding it gently whilst Emily hovers by the window, watching as the rain falls against the window.

A loud disheartened sigh echoes. “I don’t know, Pen.” Emily states as she turns around. “But if she can, it’s kinda rude for her not to wake up.” Emily chuckles, and Penelope joins in for a second.

“If you can hear us, Y/n,” Penelope starts, and you can hear the shake in her voice. “we all love you, and miss you dearly.”

“We’re all still here, and will be until you wake up.” Emily adds as she smiles to Penelope, holding her hand out as she gladly accepts as tears fill her eyes once more.

Sniffing to herself, Penelope glances over to the empty doorway. “And, and Hotch misses you, Y/n. I know, I know he hasn’t been here yet, but he loves you, and Jack does too.”

The thought of Jack causes your heart to ache, how you miss that boy deeply in the evenings when you would go over. Jack would always ask for your help with homework or read with him before he went to sleep. Last month, he called you ‘Mom’ and you didn’t know how to react, neither did Aaron. But you let it happen, and carried it on.

Just as Jack felt he had a new Mom, he was at risk of losing her too.

“Come on, we ought to go, let her rest.” Emily states as she walks over to Penelope, taking her arm.

If only they could hear you. You were done with resting.

It has almost been a month. At least that is what you hear them say. Outside it has become colder, snow comes and goes, but it never sticks. With ease, you can now clearly differentiate the nurses and the doctors’ voices, even by the sigh after they do their checks. You’ve heard them discuss your frequent brain activity, which is a good sign. They’re now thinking you’re going to wake up, that it could be any day. But then again, they’ve been saying that for the last two weeks.

Another Doctor walks in and checks over you, nothing out of the ordinary as you wish he would stop humming that awful TV show tune. “You have a visitor this morning, Miss Y/L/N.” He states which is unusual, your visitors are never announced to you, they just sort of appear.

Your ears perk up to the sound of shuffling, quickly followed by a restricted sob, one you sadly could pinpoint; Aaron.

“Hi, Y/n,” Aaron quietly speaks up, his voice hoarse as the chair scrapes across the floor and he reaches out, taking your cold hand in his. “I’m sorry I haven’t been sooner.” He turns to business mode, forcing confidence even though he’s breaking apart, seeing you like this. “I just,”

‘It’s okay, Aaron. Take your time.’ You want to tell him, that it’s not easy, nothing about this is. But you simply listen as he exhales shakily and he takes lifts his other hand, enveloping yours into both of his.

A small sigh breaks the moment of silence. “Jack, he keeps asking about where you are. I’m running out of options here, Y/n.” He chuckles out of worry. “Jessica has been great, taking care of him and everything, I’ve barely left my office since the accident.” Hotch explains, seeing flashes of light illuminating you that night, like an angel. The excitement in your expression turning to pure terror as he ran toward you, but was too late.

Hotch was always too late to save the women he loves.

“I just, I need you, Y/n.” Hotch mutters. “I can’t lose you too, I just can’t.” Soft cries sound from him as the door opens, and he sniffs quietly.

“Sorry to interrupt, I’ll come back later.” Someone speaks up, and Hotch nods to them before returning his attention to you.

He tried not to stare at the evident wounds and scars that will line your skin forever. The stitches on your forehead from where you hit the ground.

Hotch will never forget how he held you in his arms as you were bleeding, eyes glazed over as he yelled for you to keep your eyes open.

“I know sometimes things aren’t always easy for us, with cases and barely having time to ourselves. But I really wanted that night to be special, you deserved a night to be reminded how wonderful you are.” Hotch chuckles dryly, looking around the room. “Look where that got us.”

‘It’s not your fault, Aaron.’ You scream internally, wishing you could just take hold of his hand, squeeze it tightly and never let go. ‘Please, just listen to me, please.’

“I know it’s taken me too long to get here, but I don’t know if I can do this, Y/n.” Hotch’s voice hitches as his hands begin to slip out from yours. “Reid mentioned how talking to comatose patients is supposed to help but er, I guess we’ll eventually find out.”

Rising to his feet, you plead for him to stay, to not leave you here alone.

“I love you Y/n.” Hotch calls out as he stands in the doorway, seeing your chest rising and falling rhythmically, remembering the days where you’d lie beside him in bed, enjoying the moment of tranquil before Jack wound run through the door, waking you from a deep sleep. “I promise I’ll be back soon.”

As Hotch turns the corner, he can’t stop the tears from falling as he collapses against one of the walls. Silent cries sound from his lips as a Nurse approaches him, but he brushes her off.

“Aar,” Your lips begin to part, a faint sound leaving them. But then silence returns, and you’re still trapped in your mind, wishing he could return.

PART TWO

384 notes · View notes

nanasparadise · 4 years

Text

“Be my valentine” Yan! Josuke x female reader

Valentine’s special! <3

Summary: In order to please your mum, you ask out Josuke for a fake date on Valentine’s Day. Little do you know that the date is realer to him than you would like…

TW: stalking, noncon touching, threat, reader gets physically hurt, toxic relationship, MATURE AUDIENCE ONLY/MINORS DNI

I do not condone any yandere behaviour in real life.

Josuke has been aged up to 18. No minor content on my blog!!!!

Word count: 2442

Nervously, you tucked on the skirt of your school uniform. If your mum would have been here, she’d have scolded you for your tick, informing you that it was rude to fumble with your clothes. You sighed deeply at that thought. Your mum. She was the reason you were in this embarrassing situation now. Gathering all your courage, you took a deep breath and walked up to the most popular guy at your school: Josuke Higashikata. A feeling of dread manifested itself deep in your stomach. “Oh God Y/N, it’s not too late to turn around and leave”, you thought anxiously. Pushing aside your idea of fleeing, you kept heading towards your schoolmate’s direction. It wasn’t that you didn’t like Josuke – on the contrary, you two liked each other enough to share some small talk in the hallway. It’d be hard to bear a grudge against the kindest and happiest boy at school. That was the reason you chose him for this stupid date your mother forced you on. After all, he was known throughout Morioh for his helpfulness. So surely, he’d help you out of your misery as well, right? Seeing your approaching form from afar, Josuke flashed you a gleeful grin and waved eagerly at you. Awkwardly, you waved back, a shy smile adorning your lips.

“Hey Y/N, great to see you!”, the boy enthusiastically greeted you when you’d finally arrived. Next to Josuke stood his best friend Okuyasu, smiling and waving as well. Though you weren’t really friends, you weren’t surprised by their overbrimming friendliness.

“Hi Josuke and Okuyasu”, you replied clumsily. In moments like these, you wished you were more socially gifted. Instead, you felt heat coming off your skin from this simple and innocent action, your embarrassment being already visible through your slight stutter and awkward body position.

“What’s up?”, Morioh’s sweetheart asked you, his grin never leaving his mouth. The pompadour bearing boy relished your bashful behaviour.

“How cute”, he thought dreamily.

“Uhm, how do I start…”, you mused, fumbling again with your skirt as your nervousness grew. “Well, you see, I’m kinda in this situation where my mum forces me to go on a date with someone for Valentine’s Day. I know, it sounds stupid and it totally is, but she thinks I should be more self-assured and social and apparently, asking someone out is the perfect opportunity to boost my confidence,” you chuckled timidly.

Josuke’s sky blue eyes lit up at your words. Was he dreaming? Were you, Y/N L/N, his secret crush, really asking him out on a date? Okuyasu seemed to have the same thoughts as he shamelessly pushed his elbow in his best friend’s ribs and wiggled suggestively his eyebrows. Josuke glared darkly at him, signalling the boy to not embarrass him in front of you. Your schoolmate still couldn’t fully grasp the situation. He’d been imagining countless times how it’d be to go out with you: to hold your smaller hand, to touch your shiny hair, to kiss your sweet lips…

Though your following words did put a damper on Josuke’s reverie.

“Of course it wouldn’t be a real date, you know? We’d be just faking it to please my mum. She threatened she wouldn’t let me home again unless I was in company with my date and by the way she looked at me, I don’t doubt her words a bit.” Oh. So you didn’t really want to be his valentine. Josuke’s cheerful demeanour slowly died down at your statement, his smile vanishing. You stared back at him, confusion entering your mind. Didn’t he agree with your suggestion? Did you ask too much of him?

“Maybe I should offer him something in return.”

“I owe you big time if you agree to this. Please Josuke, I really need to do this and I don’t wanna ask another person. I’d be so, so grateful if you’d help me out. I swear, I’ll never bother you again then!”, you pleaded, giving him your best puppy eyes. The boy in front of you couldn’t help but give in to you. His typical grin appeared one more time as his earlier disappointment melted away. You might not ask him out voluntarily, but the male made it his mission to show you after this date just how much he truly loved you - and how you two could be a real couple.

“Sure thing Y/N,” Josuke answered chipperly, “just one thing – don’t say you bother me. You could never.” The boy winked confidently at you. Again, you felt heat rising in your face as you stuttered awkwardly a “thank you”. Both Josuke and Okuyasu laughed whole-heartly at your reaction, which only increased your embarrassment. “So, we’ll meet next week at 7 p.m. at Tonio’s?”

You were so peaceful when you slept. Slowly, your chest would rise and fall, a calm cycle that would persist until you’d eventually wake up. Tender blue eyes marvelled at your slumbering form. Gently, as to not startle and awaken you, the male caressed your soft cheek. Fortunately for him, you were a deep sleeper. It was ironic how the boy had no qualms breaking into your room at night - he had been doing so for months – but couldn’t have asked you out on a date. No, you had to do that for him, even if it wasn’t out of love. “Yet”, Josuke reminded himself. He was hellbent on making you fall in love with him. Why wouldn’t you? After all, he was Morioh’s sweetheart, admired by everyone. Yes, you’d fall for his charm, he was sure of that. A small sigh escaped his mouth. Josuke’s fingers now wandered down to your lips, wondering how they would feel against his. Longingly, he gazed at you. He would give up everything if it meant to be with you forever, to hold you in his arms every night, to wake up to your beautiful face every morning. For you to be his. “I can’t wait for our date, babe,” Josuke whispered giddily, “it will be the beginning of our relationship, I can feel it.”

To your surprise, your “date” had gone actually quite smoothly. You’d expected an awkward silence between you, but Josuke had kept you entertained the whole time during dinner, cracking jokes and telling odd stories. He’d even gifted you a box of chocolates with a note saying “Be my valentine” on it. You’d refused to take it, but Josuke had been insisted.

“No really, accept it please. I want to give it to you. Plus, it will increase the authenticity of our date”, he had winked at you with his usual smile. His gentleman behaviour hadn’t stopped there: your schoolmate had complimented the dress you wore and had even paid for your dinner. No matter how many times you’d persisted on paying yourself, Josuke had remained stubborn.

“Please, we’re not in the 50s anymore, I can pay for myself. I really don’t wanna burden you any further and-“

“No,” he had cut you off, “I’m going to pay for everything. You still don’t understand that you’re not a burden to me. I want this to be the best date ever for you, so of course I’m going to pay.” Realising that you couldn’t have won this argument, you’d simply sighed and rolled your eyes at him while the boy had given you a goofy grin.

Right now, the two of you stood in front of the door of your house. Gingerly, you took Josuke’s hand into yours, giving the illusion that you two had been doing so the whole time, while fumbling for your keys in your purse. The male’s eyes widened at your action and he blushed deeply, butterflies bursting in his stomach. Finally, you managed to open the door and the pair of you entered your home.

“Mum, I’m back!”, you shouted nervously in the hall, “And my date is with me!”

“Oh my, dear, no need to scream”, your mother responded as she walked down the stairs. When she perceived you two standing there holding hands, a bright smile appeared on her face.

“Hello Mrs L/N!”, Josuke greeted her politely, wanting to leave a good impression for her.

“Hi Josuke! I’m glad to see you here,” your mum answered cheerily, “How’s your mother doing?”

After some small talk and a couple of embarrassing questions concerning your date from your mother, the two of you were outside in front of your door again to say each other goodbye. It was already pitch dark and the cool wind made you shiver slightly.

“Thank you so much Josuke,” you said eventually, gratefulness dripping from your voice, “without you, I’d be sleeping outside this night.” The male laughed sincerely at your joke.

“With pleasure Y/N, you know I’d do anything for you.”

You looked at him with big eyes, astonishment written on your face. He did realise that this had been just a fake date, right? Feeling uncomfortable, you simply cleared your throat, ignoring his comment.

“Anyway, I still owe you a favour for this. Do you maybe already have something on your mind?”, you awkwardly asked.

“How about this”, Josuke murmured dreamily. Without a warning, his lips crashed onto yours. For someone so sweet and friendly, his kiss was surely demanding. You could feel every tiny bit of his passion seeping through his mouth. A pair of hands were placed on either side of your face, ensuring your position. Josuke kissed you as if he’d be drowning and you were his only source of air. He took in every touch, every smell, every taste coming from your body and bathed indulgently in it. While the boy enjoyed every second of this moment, you did not. You thought you had made clear beforehand that you didn’t intend this to be a real date, that you weren’t currently interested in a relationship… Hesitantly, you placed your hands on Josuke’s chest and pushed slightly, signalling him to let go of you. To your surprise, he did so quite easily. Through heavy-lidded eyes, Josuke looked down at your smaller form, a love-struck smile building on his face.

“Josuke…”, you whispered. Ah, how he loved it when you said his name. His grin only grew bigger. “I’m sorry for not having been clear enough, but this wasn’t an actual date. I’m not looking for a relationship. I’m really sorry, I didn’t want to lead you on or something…” Immediately, his happy face fell.

“But Y/N, we had such a great evening!”, Josuke replied, desperation swinging in his voice, “I know you didn’t intend this to be real, but I thought you changed your mind! You seemed so happy during our date, didn’t I make you happy?”

“Of course you did!”, you intervened, trying to calm the boy down, “Of course, Josuke. You’re a great guy, really, I just don’t wanna be in a relationship now.”

“But why?” You could see tears forming in the corner of his blue eyes. “I don’t get it. You said you enjoyed the date and you like me, why not be with me then? I can’t wait for you any longer Y/N, I’ve been already waiting for so long. And now that I’ve got a taste of your love, I can’t go back to simply watching you. No Y/N, I need you now.” His comment gave you the chills. Never in your life would you have thought that you’d be feeling afraid of Morioh’s sweetheart. Suddenly, you were shivering again, but this time, it wasn’t because of the cold.

“Josuke, I’m sorry about all of this. If I would have known your feelings towards me beforehand, I wouldn’t have asked you out on this fake date. But again, I don’t want a relationship right now. You need to respect that”, you replied, while trying to turn towards the door to flee the situation. Though Josuke made sure you didn’t escape him. One strong hand grabbed forcefully your right hand. Intense eyes bore into yours, a darkness clouding them. You prepared yourself to scream, but your schoolmate reacted faster, putting the other hand over your mouth to muffle your voice.

“I’m really sorry for what I’ll do now, I truly am, Y/N,” his normally chipper voice sounded so sombre, so dangerous, “but I have no other choice. I want you, I need you. And I have to make sure you feel like that towards me as well.” Suddenly, his hand grasped your little finger and with a snap, Josuke easily broke its bones. Hot pain seethed through your body as you screamed into his other hand. Tears streamed out of your eyes.

“Are you staying with me now, Y/N? Just nod your head and then I’ll make the pain go away, I promise.” Confused, you just kept staring at him. What was he talking about? You just stood there, too scared to react. Seemingly dissatisfied with your lack of response, Josuke took your ring finger and shattered it, too. Another muffled scream escaped your lips.

“Please, my love, I don’t enjoy this. I’m hurting when you’re hurting. Just nod your head for me, okay? Everything will be alright then”, the boy answered, tears streaming down his cheeks as well. Too afraid that he would injure you more, you simply do as he told you. A sigh of relief came from his mouth. “Thank you.” He whispered nearly inaudibly. A few moments later, you could feel how your previously damaged fingers were miraculously healed again. “

H-h-how did-d y-you- “, you stuttered in disbelief, though Josuke immediately interrupted you.

“I’ll explain it to you another time, okay?” He was all soft edges again as he tenderly took your hands in his. You instinctively flinched at his action, scared that he would hurt you again. But the boy seemed to choose ignoring your reaction. “I’ll pick you up for school tomorrow. I can’t wait to tell Okuyasu that we’re a couple. From now on, we’ll spend every moment together, right, my darling?” You knew, you didn’t have much of a choice. Feeling like you were at his mercy, you peeped a quiet “yes”. Josuke’s face lit up at your compliance. He happily planted a kiss at your forehead. “You should go back inside, I don’t want you to get sick due to the cold”, the boy murmured to you in order to say goodbye. Josuke finally released his grip from your hands, veering himself away from your house. You stared after him, still under shock. But before your now “boyfriend” truly left, he turned around one more time, shooting you his most dazzling smile.

“Goodnight,” he wished you softly, “dream of me.”

#JJBA #JoJo's Bizarre Adventure #yandere jjba #diamond is unbreakable #diu #yandere josuke #yandere josuke x reader #yandere #yandere x reader #minors dni #tw: yandere #tw: aged up character #tw: noncon touching #tw: stalking #tw: injury #tw: threats

285 notes · View notes

strangertheory · 3 years

Note

I hope you’re doing well :)

I'm doing okay. Life has its ups and downs.

I haven't been as active on this blog as I used to be, and I'd like to share with you all a little bit of context and what's going on in my life.

(This is a long post in which I'll overshare a bit and dump some of my feelings into paragraph form, so if anyone doesn't feel up to reading a multi-paragraph post about my depression and anxieties don't feel obligated.)

I have been a freelancer for the last three-ish years. I didn't like the way my former employer treated me or other workers, so I quit and I tried running my own business. It was really great at the beginning. Things felt promising. I had (and still have) customers who I love working with and who value my work. It enabled me and my sweetheart to travel and go backpacking and work remotely and see so many places we'd never been and meet so many new people. But no matter what I did, I couldn't figure out how to make my freelance work grow beyond a certain amount of projects at any given time and I was probably not charging enough for my services for a long while. The pandemic hurt a lot of my work too, and many of my customers disappeared while they tried to figure out what they needed to do for themselves too.

I've been incredibly lucky and in spite of things not working out, I had a wonderful few years running my own remote business while traveling and having experiences I never would have otherwise had. But right now I'm searching for new employment and hoping to find an opportunity in a larger company again while also still working for a few customers who still need me and have continued to hire me for projects, and the job search combined with my freelance work and the pandemic and various other personal life events has made life more complicated and more emotionally stressful.

The job search is a discouraging process. The pandemic has been emotionally draining and stressful, but I am very fortunate and I have been fully vaccinated. But the job search is weighing on me a lot emotionally. I swing between feeling confident in myself and my network and my opportunities, and feeling as though there must be something wrong with me and my skill-set and my resume and that I must be going about things all wrong and fearing that after three years of not making enough to pay the bills while freelancing and after draining all of my savings trying to make my own company work that things aren't going to turn around any time soon.

I've also been feeling a deep emotional wound around my relationship with my family. They care about me on a certain level very, very much... but they don't truly love and accept me as who I am, and they're very prejudiced and set in their ways. This has been weighing on me more lately since I'm recognizing that my parents are getting older but I haven't figured out a way to reconcile with them on issues that mean a lot to me. I just want them to love me as I am and accept me for who I am because I love them so much but I'm struggling to figure out if there's anything I can do to change their mindsets or if I'm even ready to try doing more than what I've already done in my efforts to do that, since it would involve even more emotional energy and vulnerability that might not even make a difference or could even make things worse between us. I think I've already tried and done a lot in my effort to encourage them to change their hearts about things, and I probably need to spend more time seeking therapy and making peace with my lack of control over their ideologies and opinions and to make peace with the way they choose to love me even if they're not accepting of every part of who I am. But it's hard.

And I suppose I also have plenty of anxieties around certain aspects of the online Stranger Things fandom itself these days too. That's certainly also a factor in my absence.

I have really enjoyed sharing my ideas and theories with you all, but I don't want my thoughts and feelings and convictions and ideas that I choose to share to provoke any conflict that I don't have the emotional l energy to process in a healthy way.

I might escape this funk at some point and happily return to writing long posts and analyses about ideas that I have. I don't know how long I'm going to feel the need to take a break. When I have so much in my life that I'm already worried about, I am trying to spend my free time in ways that make me feel happy and I suppose right now I'm feeling emotionally vulnerable and unwilling to share my feelings about a story and characters that I'm overly emotionally invested in. I use fiction to escape from my real-world troubles and to find catharsis, but at times (like right now) I slip into being too emotionally invested to the point of connecting too strongly with fictional scenarios and being concerned with the opinions of other fans in ways that impact my wellbeing in a negative way. I need to sometimes step back a bit until I've recentered myself emotionally.

I value the friendships that I have made in this corner of the internet so, so much. Your interest in my ideas and our sharing of our different theories and our mutual fondness for this wonderful series and its characters has brought me a lot of joy and helped me feel less alone in many ways. But when I'm feeling like my family doesn't understand and respect me and I'm feeling alone, I do need to be wary of looking for finding understanding online when there's a certain culture of misunderstanding and drama if I accidentally wade into the wrong online circles that aren't seeking to understand me or seeking to share their thoughts with me in a mutually respectful way but are seeking to feast on social media drama or people who are seeking out someone to be angry at who they don't know and who they can turn into the scapegoat for their own worries. Strangers online aren't always kind and they aren't always willing to remember I'm just another fan and human being.

So with my depression and my increasing anxiety around my relationships and communities both online and offline I've been quieter here lately. I've been trying to spend less time in fandom spaces and trying to get more time outside in the fresh air, get more sleep, spend time with people who I know love me and allow me to feel heard and understood and respected, and figure out what I need for my health and happiness that I'm struggling to find.

I want to reassure you all that I'm very lucky, that I'm very safe, and that I have no worries about food or a place to live or anything like that and that I have a good network of people in my life who will make sure I'm okay. But depression and anxiety and other undiagnosed mental health struggles and unemployment and family issues can weigh on a person.

I'm still here. Thank you for spending time with me in this corner of the internet even if I've been really quiet lately. I still love Stranger Things. I still appreciate the friends I've made here. And maybe I'll return to blogging more regularly and with enthusiasm and joy when we have new content or when season 4 is released. I don't know where I'll be at emotionally later today, tomorrow, or next week. I'm taking things one day at a time. Sometimes I might write about my ideas and reply to Asks, and sometimes I might not. Sometimes I might reblog posts by others that I appreciate, and sometimes I might not post anything at all for a while. Thanks for understanding. ♥️

#do not reblog #personal

12 notes · View notes

arofili · 4 years

Note

how’d u get into writing? like, writing fic and being part of the silm community, being Known, that stuff? i’m really new to being a silm cc and i’d love to know ur advice! also: how’d u build up the confidence to start posting meta/hcs? bc i have a Lot of hcs and meta ideas but also i’m really anxious abt posting them bc yknow anxiety is like that

these are some great questions, anon! I’m gonna go through them one by one :)

how’d u get into writing?

not to be like, super cliche, but I’ve...kind of always been a writer? as long as I can remember I’ve been telling stories, and when I was too young to read or write I would dictate them to my mom, who would type them up for me and help me choose clipart illustrations to accompany them. when I got old enough I would always be writing; I attempted my first novel at age 9, and while that never really went anywhere I did finish the darn thing and it had some pretty sophisticated plot twists for a 9-year-old!

like, writing fic

around the same time I got into fandom! I was deep into Warrior cats (like. really deep) and I believe I started writing my first fics when I was like? 10 or 11? my memory is kind of fuzzy on the order of things, but I know I got an account on the Warriors forums when I was 9, and that I was already posting my fic there when I made my FFN account. I believe I was 12 when that happened, but who knows. I haven’t the faintest idea of what happened with those forums, but uhhh pretty much all of my Warriors fic is still up on FFN lmao. you could probably find that if you want to but um...maybe don’t?

my first Big Fic was a self-insert of...my entire 5th/6th grade class into the then-current timeline of the Warriors books...well. I honestly think that might still be my most popular fic of all time l m a o though I try not to think about it because Hashtag Cringe. though as much as I look back on that time with a “yikes,” I am very grateful for the Warriors fandom in a way? that place was so accepting and encouraging of OCs, of AUs, of completely disregarding canon, of worldbuilding that is completely alien from canon - it was a fantastic sandbox to begin with, there were so many ways to write stories and practically all of them were accepted and had fellow fans invested in them!

and being part of the silm community,

soooo I wrote Warriors fic until my freshman year of high school (wow sdjfhkdsjfh), which was when BOTFA came out, and I was absolutely wrecked by the ending and immediately started writing my own fixit fic. I was also super hooked on Kiliel! so that was my intro to the Tolkien fandom; and simultaneously, I joined tumblr, and, well, the rest is history tbh.

I honestly do not remember when I first read the Silm, but I kind of got into the more obscure parts of the Tolkien fandom through fandom osmosis, and I do have a vague memory of doodling the Finwean family tree in geometry class so it might have been later on in freshman year? that was also the same time I was having my Queer Awakening, and Russingon definitely contributed to me unlearning my internalized queerphobia, so probably around then.

anyway - queer awakening, tumblr, Tolkien, transitioning from FFN to AO3 - all of that was happening around the same time. I know I dipped my toes in the Silm fandom then, but I was still primarily a Hobbit fic writer focusing on Kiliel. toward the end of high school I kind of shifted to LOTR and (qp) Gigolas...but somehow the Silm fandom is the most active of the Big Three within the Tolkien fandom, and I was getting dragged further and further in.

it wasn’t until @backtomiddleearthmonth 2019, my freshman year of college, that I really dove into writing Silm fic! I picked some Silm-specific bingo cards and never looked back :D that was really not all that long ago but I am obsessed in a way I don’t really remember being even with TH/LOTR, I obviously cannot see the future but I anticipate hanging out here for a long time. the Silm fandom is great overall and there’s just so much material to work with!! <3

being Known, that stuff?

so I don’t really have a whole lot of context on how “well known” I am in the fandom?? definitely within the past year and a half or so I’ve noticed that I like, get asks like this, and get a significant amount of notes on my posts, and I’ve made a lot of fandom friends especially since I joined some Silm servers on Discord (hmu if you want invites; I’m on the SWG server and 2 general Silm servers and the Russingon server) this past year. and I have 3,000 followers as of this month - and while ever since I hit 1k I don’t particularly pay attention to my follower count I can definitely say that I have more engagement now than I used to! but it took me a long time to build this “audience,” I suppose; I’ve been around the Tolkien fandom since late 2014, so nearly 6 years of this, lol.

really the best way to build a following, in my experience, is to just post a lot of stuff. when I started making edits I got a lot more engagement, because for a long time I would post one every day! (I made them in batches and queued them; I didn’t actually make one every day lol...and now I’m too busy to do that, so I just make edits for events and whenever I feel like it) And I have [checks ao3] 145 works in the Silm fandom as of today - I’m fairly prolific! I’ve come to generally expect 3-10 comments on most of my oneshots, which is a lot more than I used to have back in the day. consistency and quantity are more likely to attract people to your work - and quality, of course.

also: how’d u build up the confidence to start posting meta/hcs?

I’ve been writing since I was very young, and I’ve been writing fic for like...11 years? I think? in that time I’ve produced a lot of garbage, but imo most of that was in my Warrior cats phase, so I came into the Tolkien fandom with confidence in myself and my writing. I’m also working on original fiction on the side (I hope to eventually become a published fantasy author, but right now school takes up most of my time that I don’t devote to fandom, which gives me more immediate gratification and also is just Very Fun) and I know I’m a good writer.

basically, I’ve been doing this for like...half my life, and I’m still fairly young, so I’ve had time to build up my skill and confidence and I know I’m only going to get better with time. you will get better with practice. like I said, I’ve written a lot of terrible stuff, and it’s only through sucking for a long time that I’ve gotten to the point I am now. and I am far from perfect; I know I still have lots of room to grow!

for meta and headcanons specifically, I started with writing fic, and then when I didn’t think I could stretch something into an entire fic I would just make a hc post. I have a vivid memory of writing my first meta in a notebook during driver’s ed because it was so goddamn boring and I had Thoughts about Tauriel and Thranduil!

in my experience, meta comes from having Opinions and wanting to share them and most importantly to back them up - you need to have sources! you need to have reasons! you need to have justification! otherwise it’s not meta, it’s a headcanon or an AU. which is fine!! I love hc/AU!!! but they are not the same as meta, and I’m a stickler for being accurate when it comes to meta. if you have sources and shit to back you up, that will help you build the confidence to share your meta.

sharing disinformation and passing it off as meta instead of just coming out and saying this is a headcanon/baseless theory/AU or whatever is such a fandom pet peeve of mine; it’s not bad for something to not be Accurate! you just have to have that disclaimer - and even when you’re writing meta, you’re offering an interpretation of the text, and you need to acknowledge that other interpretations also exist and are valid.

um. I hope this answers your questions? and sorry for basically word-vomiting my entire life story, lol. this post got long; the main reason I’ve written so much fic is because I really just cannot shut up for the life of me. sooo if you can tear of that filter of being shy and just. say shit. you can go so far~!

OH and one more thing - I can’t believe I almost forgot this - but part of being a writer is participating in the community. this is code for LEAVE A DAMN COMMENT IF YOU LIKE A FIC. that’s how I made most of my fandom friends before Discord! I follow @ao3feed-silmarillion and stalk that blog for new Silm fics; I read the ones that interest me and comment on them.

I know this is not really the most common way for folks to find fic but it’s so rewarding to interact with new fic, new writers, new commentors, new stories - you can find gems that don’t rise to the top of the kudos/bookmark lists; you become friends with your fellow writers; you can watch people grow and change; you support smaller content creators. yeah, you might not be getting Just The Best Stuff, but it’s so so so worth it!!

and if you make friends in the comment section of other people’s fic - I guarantee you some of them will go to your AO3 profile and check out your fic, too! and they’ll leave comments! this is a fic community, and that’s what I cherish about fandom most of all, tbh.

anyway - again - sorry for rambling so much, but I hoped this helped! feel free to send in another ask, or to come talk to me off anon if you’d like! and definitely send me your stuff if/when you decide to share it; I would love to support you!!! <3

#silm #silm fandom #silmarillion #fan culture #tmi anna #(for real this time sjdfhdkfh)#tefain nin #long post #anon #answers

64 notes · View notes

beingdaniellarebecca · 4 years

Text

How to Make Imposter Syndrome a Thing of the Past

Imposter syndrome: A fancy savy turm for feelings of severe inadequacy and self-doubt regarding one’s skills and achievements. You may have heard of it?

Recognizing Imposter Syndrome

My own experiences with imposter syndrome can be traced far back. One memory stands out really clearly in my mind. I am 15, clad in black sweaters and eyeliner, lying in my bed, listening to My Chemical Romance. I feel depressed and hopeless, and here is the thought causing those feelings: Woe is me, l will never be able to be the frontwoman of a famous emo band because neither of my parents were drug addicts.

I’m super serious. I legitimately thought that because my life did not look like Gerard Way’s, I would never be able to create music the way that he did.

Years have passed, my music taste has evolved and rotated, and this imposter syndrome I speak of has lessened. Actually, these past few months, it’s lessened so much, that I can look back and fully recognize the state of imposter syndrome I was once in. At the time, it felt so real, like all my fears were true and there was no other option but to believe them. Like a fish who doesn’t know what water is because he’s never known anything else.

Exposing Imposter Syndrome as a Jumble of Untrue Thoughts

In retrospect, I can now put a name to that cloud of confusion that surrounded me, the fear that I'm not good enough, that I don't know enough, the paralyzing self-doubt that I was doing everything all wrong. The absolute conviction that I do not have what it takes.

In my opinion, this is really the essence of imposter syndrome. This conviction that we are lacking something that other’s have, like they are all ‘real’ artists/musicians/entrepreneurs, and I am only an imposter. Be it a specific education, more money, a different nationality, we think we can’t be like them cause we aren’t them.

These days, when imposter syndrome comes for a visit, I politely direct it towards the nearest exit, reminding it to take a mint on it’s way out. You see, I’ve figured out how to see through imposter syndrome's cloudy veil. I've found out how to unravel all the little knots it has tied up around me.

I have a friend who draws and paints. Often when we talk, my friend and I, she brings up all her insecurities and self-doubts regarding her art Instagram account. She wants to someday have lots of followers, and make money off of her art, and share it with the world. But she sees other artists’ accounts, the kinds with 15k followers, and she compares herself to them.

"I don't have a consistent style like them."

"I'm not interesting like them."

"I don't have the confidence that they do."

(Enter imposter syndrome.)

Let me tell you something about my friend. Her art is really good. She posts consistently, just like all those other people do. When I open up her account and look at it from an outsider's point of view, it looks like a blooming art account, with all the right stuff happening in all the right places. High quality art. Consistent posting. I look at her account and see no difference between hers and that of one of those famous people she mentioned, content-wise. She’s doing everything right.

So I tell her that. I say, “Dude, from where I’m standing, your account looks just like all those other accounts. I know you, so I know about all your overthinking and indecisiveness, all of your insecurities and self-doubts. But if I was looking at your account and I didn’t know you, I would see a flawless account and assume a flawless creator. So aren’t we doing that to all those successful artists that we don’t know personally? They probably are thinking exactly what you’re thinking. That they aren’t good enough, that they aren’t consistent enough…you just can’t see it from their account. Someone below you is probably looking at your account thinking ‘I’ll never be where she is.’”

BAM.

Do you get my point? Did I make it clear enough?

If not, let me clarify that for you: Imposter syndrome is a trick of the mind, misinforming us and coming to mythical conclusions based on the little we know of other people.

Here's another example. My mom started doing Facebook lives lately, to promote her mind-body chronic pain coaching service. One time, literally in the same house as her, but in a different room, I went on Facebook and tuned in to her call for a few minutes.

From my computer, it looked like any other Facebook live. It could've been Joe Dispenza talking. (Super famous mind-body guru. Look him up.) Except it wasn’t, it was my mom, and there weren’t as many people watching. But again, content-wise? Same quality.

What I knew about my mom, that all of her viewers didn’t, was that she had a glass of wine before she went live, to calm her nerves, and that as soon as it was over, she was anxiously overthinking all the things she said, cursing herself for whatever unnoticeable mistakes she made. I don’t know Joe Dispenza personally. But I wouldn’t be surprised to hear that he goes through a similar ordeal, unknown to his viewers. Or that he did, at some point in his early beginnings as a New Age sensation.

We see what others do from the outside, and we think it was all smooth sailing for them. That they were born with a 300k fanbase and a soaring talent for whatever it is. We see their posts, their videos, their finished projects, and for the most part, we don't see their thoughts, feelings, fears, self-doubts....and we believe that we are different than them. We think they have it all together. We think that because of that, we can never succeed because we don’t have it all together. But neither do they! Or at least, they didn’t in the beginning! And that is perfectly fine and natural. It’s just part of being a creator. Everyone experiences it. (Maybe a few people don’t. I’m not sure where they come from or what they’re doing here.)

Now I’ve shown you the untruth fueling this notorious imposter syndrome. Now I’ll tell you what is true.

Feeling the Fear and Doing it anyway

What is true is that you definitely will not succeed if you don't try. The difference between those who are out there creating content, music, films, art, and those who aren't, is that the first group feels the fear and does it anyway. While the second feels the fear...and maybe gives it a little too much space.

I’m all for giving your fear a little space. See it, allow it, accept it, acknowledge it. And then do the thing anyway.

Realizing that there is nothing significant that separates me from the people out there succeeding has helped me lower the volume on my imposter syndrome. And now I have a blog, where I write articles that I don’t feel so confident about, but I keep working at. I know now that most people started exactly where I did, and if I keep at it, I have a chance of getting to where they are. Because the only difference between them and me is time and experience. Skill is aquired. (If you think talent is something you’re born with and have no control over, than read Daniel Coyle’s The Talent Code. Basically, it’s not, but that’s for a whole different article.)

I hope that I’ve helped you open your eyes a little bit more to the reality that you have everything you need to get started. Or maybe you already knew, and you just needed a little reminder. Go out and follow your dream. Go do the thing. Feel your fear, call it by its true name- a false thought- and do it anyway.

#self help #fear #imposter syndrome #self love #self improvement #growth #inspiration #psychology #thoughts

3 notes · View notes

protectjugheadjonesiii · 5 years

Text

The Lucky One

Pairing: Archie x Reader

Word count: 1,950ish but feel free to add more

A/N: if you didn’t see my post about my inactivity but I won’t writing imagines on this blog anymore. however, i’m posting all of my incomplete imagines and i would love it if you all would reblog them and add on how you think the imagines should continue and end. i’ll be reblogging every addition that i see :)

New to town with a made up name in the Angel city, chasing fortune and fame And the camera flashes, make it look like a dream

Unlike most kids in Riverdale, (Y/N) (Y/L/N) dreamed of bigger things she could do with her life, greater achievements she could accomplish outside of her small hometown.

Life in Riverdale wasn’t bad; she had her friends: Betty, Archie, and Jughead. The four of them were known as the four musketeers, always stumbling around the quiet streets with barking laughter.

The ten year olds made a home in Pop’s diner, their regular booth being touched by no one but themselves.

But even with her strong bonds of friendship, (Y/N) grew restless with her head full of dreams. Riverdale was too small of a town for her to go anywhere far in life, and that was exactly what she wanted to do.

“Do you think we’ll all grow old together?” Betty asked the table one night. “Maybe we’ll be like our parents: we’ll go to school together, marry each other, and have kids that are best friends with each other.”

“Well then who are you gonna marry, Betty?” Archie inquired with a smirk. “Me or Jughead?”

“How do you know she doesn’t want to marry (Y/N)?” Jughead interjected, withholding his laughter at the transition of Archie’s facial expression from confidence to shock. Jughead turned to (Y/N), who had been wistfully staring out the window in silence during the conversation, “What do you think, (Y/N)?”

“Hmm?” she hummed, turning to face her friends. She bit her lip, not wanting to talk about her opposing life plans. “Oh yeah, I’ll be here.”

You had it figured out since you were in school Everybody loves pretty, everybody loves cool So overnight you look like a sixties’ queen

Every year at Riverdale Elementary, the fourth graders did a project on what they wanted to be when they grew up. They had to brainstorm ideas of what they wanted to be and then research some requirements for said profession. At the end of the month, each student would present their project to the class.

“I want to join my dad’s construction company,” Archie announced during his presentation. “He told me that when I’m older, I can spend the summer helping him, and that one day I can even own the company!” He decided to not talk about the other ideas he had about what he wanted to be when he grew up. Being a construction worker was good enough for him.

“I want to be a journalist, just like my mom and dad,” Betty informed the class. “I would help them with their articles and eventually write my own.”

“A writer,” Jughead declared as soon as he stood up, not even allowing himself enough time to reach the front of the classroom. “I want to be a writer when I grow up. Not a journalist like Betty, though. I want to write my own stories and publish books.”

When (Y/N) did her presentation, she hesitated. She spent all her time researching what it took to become an actress, but as she stood in front of all of her friends whose plans let them stay in Riverdale, she grew unsure of herself.

“I-” she paused, giving herself one last chance to change her mind. “I want to be an actress. But I don’t want to wait until I’m grown up to become one. When I did my research, I saw that a lot of famous actors started when they were little.”

“There aren’t many movies created here in Riverdale,” the teacher commented.

(Y/N) shrugged. “Then I guess I’ll have to go find movie makers somewhere else.” She ignored Archie, Betty, and Jughead’s stunned faces as she sat down.

Another name goes up in lights, like diamonds in the sky

A few weeks later, (Y/N)’s dad announced to the (Y/L/N) family that they were moving to Hollywood, which would allow (Y/N) to pursue her dreams of becoming an actress. Her excitement only lasted for a few moments before she realized that she would have to leave her friends.

“Archie!” She stood on his doorstep, waiting for him to open the door.

“(Y/N)?” he questioned, opening the door. “What are you doing here? It’s late.”

“I need to tell you something,” she said, rocking back and forth on her feet. “I…” she trailed off, the guilt causing her throat to close up.

“You what?”

“I’m moving,” she blurted out.

“To a new house?” he asked, not grasping the severity of her statement.

“To Hollywood,” she corrected him, sadly watching as his expression deflated.

“Why aren’t you telling Betty and Jughead?” he questioned.

“I wanted to tell you first, Archie. You’re my best friend.”

“Betty and Jughead aren’t your best friends too?”

“They are…” (Y/N) shrugged, digging her heel into the ground, “but you’re my best friend.” Archie sadly nodded.

“You’re my best friend too, (Y/N).” He enveloped her in a hug, and she wrapped her arms around his neck as she buried her face in his t-shirt, trying to memorize that feeling.

And they’ll tell you now, you’re the lucky one Yeah, they’ll tell you now, you’re the lucky one But can you tell me now, you’re the lucky one, oh, oh, oh

When (Y/N) landed her first role, the entire town of Riverdale went into a frenzy. Everyone counted down the days until her movie would premiere.

Archie was confused about how he felt. He didn’t know if he was happy or upset that (Y/N) played a part in a big move. He knew it would result in her staying in Hollywood longer as she continued her career. A small, selfish part of him always hoped that she would eventually give up and come back to Riverdale.

“(Y/N)’s movie comes out tomorrow!” Betty squealed as they sat in their booth, ignoring the one empty spot next to Archie.

“The Twilight Drive-In is gonna show it,” Jughead informed them. “It’s gonna be so busy there.”

“All of Riverdale will go!” Betty exclaimed. “The whole town is so excited for this.”

When Archie continued to not respond, Betty and Jughead shared a puzzled look.

“Are you okay, Archie?” Jughead questioned, trying to make eye contact with his solemn friend.

“I’m fine.” Archie shrugged. “Just a bit tired. I think I’m gonna go home early, get to sleep. Gotta be wide awake to watch (Y/N)’s movie tomorrow.”

He exited the diner, leaving Betty and Jughead to continue their excited conversation over the movie.

Now it’s big black cars, and Riviera views, And your lover in the foyer doesn't even know you And your secrets end up splashed on the news front page

As predicted by Archie, (Y/N)’s role in her debut movie attracted other producers, allowing her more opportunities to audition for more parts. Each movie she was in became a success, and soon (Y/N) was the poster child of young Hollywood actors.

Her busy filming schedule prevented her from ever returning to her hometown, no matter how much Mayor McCoy begged her to.

Even if she were able to return, (Y/N) knew it wouldn’t be because of the mayor. It would be because of her red-headed best friend.

As much as (Y/N) tried to keep in touch with her best friend, it became increasingly difficult with each new movie role she obtained. Even when she found a spare moment to call Archie, he never answered. She always brushed it off as her calling at an inconvenient time. (Y/N) never even considered the possibility that Archie stared at his phone screen as her name appeared before silencing its rings, not daring to pick up and hear her voice.

And they tell you that you’re lucky But you’re so confused, 'Cause you don’t feel pretty, you just feel used And all the young things line up to take your place

“(Y/N)! (Y/N)!” The reporters yelled from all around the red carpet, camera flashes going off every second. Through the chaos, (Y/N) maintained a smile. By now, she was experienced with the hell of red carpets.

“(Y/N), do you have a boyfriend,” one reporter asked, holding a microphone out towards her. Her smile faltered for just a moment, but she quickly recovered.

“Oh, god no,” she answered with a light laugh. “I mean I’m only fifteen, and so much is going on in my life right now. I don’t know that anyone would want to deal with me right now.”

“So many boys are pining after you, (Y/N)!” the reporter exclaimed. “It can’t be because of that. Could it be because you already have someone? A secret lover?”

(Y/N)’s mind immediately jumped to Archie. She hadn’t seen him in five years, so she could only picture his ten-year-old face.

“No,” she said after a moment of hesitation. “No, I don’t have a secret lover.”

“You hesitated though,” the reported pointed out. “Maybe it’s just a crush?”

She thought, again, of her red-headed best friend back in Riverdale. He was the first person she told that she was moving, the only person that made her hesitate before leaving Riverdale.

“No,” (Y/N) shook her head with a bitter smile. “No crushes here.”

Another name goes up in lights You wonder if you’ll make it out alive

“Another successful movie by (Y/N),” Jughead sighed, flopping into the booth. Betty nudged him as she nodded her head towards Archie, who sat across from them. “Sorry, Arch,” Jughead apologized.

Archie shook his head and didn’t respond.

“Are you guys angry about that?” Veronica questioned. “I mean, (Y/N) (Y/L/N) is an acting legend. Isn’t there some Riverdale pride here that this small town produced one of the hottest up-and-coming actresses in Hollywood?”

“We knew (Y/N),” Betty explained quietly, not taking her eyes off of Archie.

“Yeah, I’ve met her once, too,” Veronica said, not understanding the issue at hand. “I met her at a club.”

“Veronica,” Betty reiterated, “we knew (Y/N). She was one of our best friends.”

“Oh,” Veronica finally understood. She glanced at Archie, who was picking at his French fries. “I’m sorry, I didn’t-”

Before she could finish, Archie got up and stormed out of the diner.

“(Y/N) was best friends with all of us,” Betty continued, slightly shaking her head, “but she and Archie were best friends. Everyone always thought they’d get married.”

And they’ll tell you now, you’re the lucky one Yeah, they’ll tell you now, you’re the lucky one Can you tell me now, you’re the lucky one, Oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh

As Archie continued his studies in high school, (Y/N) continued to act in movies and guest-star in TV shows.

When Archie became captain of the football team, (Y/N) was nominated for an Oscar.

Slowly but surely, both Archie and (Y/N) began to let go of each other, not daring to reminisce upon their childhood friendship.

(Y/N) stopped attempting to reach Archie, finally accepting that he was, in fact, ignoring her. She went on dates with other actors and musicians that she met, only briefly thinking of the red-head back home. Archie dated girls, such as Valerie and Veronica, and he only thought of his long-lost (Y/N) a few times.

It was a few years later, I showed up here And they still tell the legend of how you disappeared, How you took the money and your dignity, and got the hell out

After Archie graduated, he decided to stay in Riverdale to focus on his music. He could’ve gone to college, hell he could’ve moved to Nashville or LA or New York to be in a better environment to work on his music. But he saw what leaving did to (Y/N), and he knew that he didn’t want to go down that path. She was living her dream. And even if music was his dream, Archie did not want the fame that came with a successful music career.

He posted his songs on YouTube and left it at that. No promotions, no running around begging for record deals.

(Y/N), thousands of miles away, watched every single video. She smiled at his talent (and blushed at his muscular form). She hadn’t seen him since he was ten; the only things that were familiar to her were his bright red hair and soulful eyes.

127 notes · View notes

mahalkitajohnnysuh · 4 years

Text

A Preface on What’s to Come

So I’m writing this almost a month since my home country declared a community quarantine (which has now become enhanced and will last until the end of the month) due to the current pandemic. I could’ve done this earlier, but given how everything felt (and still is) chaotic about the situation, I had to prioritize some things and compose myself first before coming here.

Now that’s out of the way, I am writing this to serve as an introduction to what’s going to unfold in this blog a few days (or weeks) from now. I don’t want you, my dear reader, to go into this blindly, so this primer will consist of three parts that I advise you read first before I get to post my fics. Without further ado…

I. Why I Stan Who I Stan, aka Why I Love Johnny Suh

He wouldn’t be the name of this blog if I didn’t love him, right? But he wasn’t my first bias in the group at all. So let me take you back to the beginning, which was in late 2019 where I rediscovered SHINee. I was already in a nostalgic kick then, listening to my anime soundtracks and J-Pop a few weeks earlier. When I saw my friend and officemate’s SHINee compilation in her hard drive, I had to copy it since I think I’m ready to listen to them again. I don’t know if other Shawols experienced this but it felt painful to listen to the group after Jonghyun passed away. Although the rest of the boys still carried on in making more music, it took me until last year to fully move on.

Anyway, listening to SHINee led me to rediscover and love K-pop again. I became immersed in Taemin’s solo work – yes, I am almost three years late to MOVE but I would still love to perfect its choreography – and it was love at first listen to KEY’s solo album. After all, they were my next two biases after Jonghyun.

Since their solo works were not enough to satiate my K-pop hunger, I learned that Taemin was going to be a part of Super M and that opened more boy groups to me. I learned of EXO (I pretty much ignored them when I was in college because I am pretty loyal to SHINee and Super Junior at the time) and NCT because of this supergroup that was going to debut in the States pretty soon. I even set my alarm to watch their debut stage in LA on YouTube because I’m that excited for them!

So at first, Mark was my bias in NCT, followed by Ten. If you concluded that I have a thing for English speakers, then yes, maybe that’s the case why they appealed to me more than the others (except Taemin, of course, he will always be my favorite). Then one thing led to another, which means I fell into an NCT hole of watching their videos on YouTube. One of the first ones I watched was their Buzzfeed interview and Johnny’s humor struck me the most. I watched more, and then I realized that hey, I want to be friends with this guy; I think we’ll get along well.

Since I only have my childhood best friend to talk to about my renewed K-pop obsession, I told her I was going to write fics again. Being the supportive person that she is, she read them and commented on them once she was done. And yes, I am going to share those with you and I hope you’ll let me know what you think about them.

There was a line in one fic that caught her attention, prompting me to write about the character and Johnny being best friends who eventually fall in love with each other. I took on her challenge, and the more that I wrote, the more that I fell for him. I watched more videos of him too so I would be more inspired to write. That worked since I was able to write a fic (or two!) every day while I didn’t do anything at work.

I don’t want to call it a slow burn because I knew it took me a couple of weeks to fully fall for Johnny. Let’s just say he grew on me in a short period and you’ll read more about that in the fics to come.

So as early as now, I’m going to warn you guys that most of my fics will have lengthy introductions too because I like to explain myself a lot.

II. When Y/N Gets a Real Name

The first fics I wrote started with just Y/N. My childhood best friend, who continues to serve as my audience, didn’t mind it initially but then gave me the suggestion to give Y/N a name. She added that a play on my name would be nice and Y/N eventually became Essie. Since I go by J here, I’ll leave you to assume what my real name is which will eventually be revealed anyway since that’s her real name too.

You may also assume that the fics are a manifestation of my delulu dreams and let’s be honest here – aren’t most, if not all, fics that way? Especially when there’s Y/N involved, don’t you agree? Since I have been writing these fics for almost six months now, Essie has developed into a character of mine that is similar to me and at the same time, an annoying person who irks me sometimes. I’ll get around to that but for now, I feel she is more than just a projection of a fangirl’s deepest, darkest desires.

I hope you won’t mind if she is the subject of affection for the fics unless stated. But for now, she’s had her way with the boys – and yes, the fics aren’t all about her and Johnny.

P.S. My childhood best friend was one of the first characters to have a name in my fics and it’s also one of Kai’s many nicknames. If you are a true EXO-L, then you’d know that in a heartbeat. I find it cute because that’s also one of her many nicknames and her bias in the group is Kai, so…I live to please.

III. Purpose and Other Things You Need to Know About This Blog

The main purpose why I put up this blog is to share my works with everyone. I just don’t want to be limited to my childhood best friend, you know?

And to be honest, I have written for a lot of fandoms but my fics never got to see the light until now. I don’t know why I suddenly feel so confident to share them this time but I hope that they will make you feel things – whether that’s happy, sad, giddy, loved, or whatever – and you can let me know what you think. I would appreciate it if you can give constructive criticism, and of course, I would love it if you’ll share your favorite parts. I often re-read my fics for inspiration and most of the time, they crack me up because I would have never thought to write something about this or that.

This is also not strictly a Johnny and Essie blog since it will also feature other K-pop groups that I am a fan of. In short, expect appearances from other SM Entertainment boy groups as well. Johnny and Essie aren’t the only pairings here since I also love other NCT members but not as much as I love my gentle giant. Since you already know my first bias, then you’ll get to read about my bias wrecker soon.

The fics are also not in chronological order because I don’t work that way. I write what I think of and things build up from there. So if I post something about Johnny and Essie being friends on one day and then have them as a couple in the next, don’t be surprised. Maybe once all scenarios have been written, then I can piece them in proper order.

I may not be able to update daily because I have to focus on my day job first. But I will still try my best to post here as often as I could and interact with you guys.

So if you have further questions that you think I have not covered, then let me know through the comments.

Here’s to a fluffy, cheesy, and sometimes smutty reading experience!

Mahal ko kayong lahat! :)

#author's note #nct fanfic #nct 127 fan fic

1 note · View note

marvelxreader · 6 years

Text

Stop and Stare

Requests: Hey Lara, can I request a Tom Hiddleston imagine where you have been dating for a while and you finally make it official? Thank you, I love your blog!!

Hi! May i request Tom Hiddleston x reader fluff? Going to a carnival, holding hands and him winning you toys and stuff? Thank you lovely .x

Warnings: none

Word Count: 1,5 k

A/N: Sooo.. I really don’t know how I feel about this one, please let me know what you think!

Y/N = Your Name

Y/L/N = Your Last Name

Tom and you met at the set of the upcoming Avengers movie, where he asked you out on the second week of shooting. You’ve been dating since then but decided to keep it on the low, because you didn’t want the media to ruin it. He was hands down the best boyfriend you could ask for, but you were afraid that something might change if you made it public. There was this other side of you though, the one that wanted to shout your love from the rooftops and show the whole world what an amazing boyfriend you had and after these couple of months, you felt like it was finally time to take it there.

————————————————

„You ready, Tom? We need to go now, or we‘ll be late for the interview“, you shouted from downstairs, already waiting for him at the door, as he almost tripped over his shoes while sprinting down the steps.

„I told you to not leave them lying around everywhere“, you chuckled, earning a glare from Tom. The two of you left his apartment and the cold air instantly made you shiver.

„I told you to bring a warmer jacket“, he mocked you as he took off his coat, wrapping it around your shoulders.

„Do you think that‘s a good idea? The paparazzi will lose their shit if they see me walking around with your clothes on“

„I‘d rather risk our relationship getting public than watching my girlfriend freeze“, he answered, earning a smile from you.

After a few minutes, your chauffeur arrived and you got in the back of the black Range Rover, Tom following right after.

————————————————

„Welcome Ms. Y/L/N, welcome Mr. Hiddleston. I‘m Josh, your interviewer for today. Please, take a seat“, a tall man in his twenties greeted you and pointed at the two chairs in front of the camera, while his eyes roamed your body from head to toe.

The two of you sat down beside each other and the questions started right away. Josh asked Tom about the shoot, the costumes and the movie in general, before he turned to you.

“So Y/N, as we all know, you’re the newest member of the Avengers. You play a very physical role, how long have you been training for this part?”

“Well, since I do most of my own stunts, I need to be in the best shape possible, so I’ve been training for about one and a half years non-stop”

“Wow, that’s dedication. Is there a reason why you do your own stunts, or do you just enjoy a bit of pain?”, Josh winked at you, making you feel uncomfortable and you could see Tom shift in his seat from the corner of your eye.

“You can see my face in a lot of the fight scenes, so I have no other choice than to do the stunts myself”, you answered, trying to sound as confident as possible.

“I understand. So, your costume is mostly out of leather and metal, right? How long does it take to get out of it?”, he asked, his eyes lingering on you.

„Shouldn‘t you be asking how long it takes her to get into the costume?“, Tom interfered, the anger in him slowly rising.

You considered stopping the interview, but you knew it would blow up in the news by tomorrow, so you just kept it professional and let it slide.

“It takes a lot of people and time to get me into the costume, but after a long day of shooting I can’t wait to get out of it. It’s just so uncomfortable”

“I can only imagine.. It’s also very tight, so everything underneath it would probably be visible. Do you wear anything beneath the costume?”, a smirk grew on the interviewer’s face, “Or are you just nake - ”

“You know what? I think that’s enough for today. Let’s get out of here, love”, Tom interrupted him before taking your hand and leading you to the exit.

The two of you were walking out of the building and onto the streets of London, when Tom turned to you.

„What the hell was that?“, he asked, still upset about the previous situation, „You shouldn‘t tolerate that, darling. He was being so disrespectful to you“

“If I had turned him down, the media would have portrayed me as a dramatic bitch. You know how it is“, you said while keeping your eyes on the ground, causing Tom to stop in his tracks and lift your chin up.

„Listen Y/N, he asked you inappropriate questions and you had every right to stop the interview back there. Next time something like this happens, you stand up for yourself, okay?“, he said before giving you a kiss on the forehead.

„We‘re still out in public, you know that, right?“

„So what? They must have figured it out by now“

„Does that mean we‘re making this official?“, you grinned at him.

„I guess so“, he said, pushing a strand of hair behind your ear, “You know what? I don’t want to go home yet and there’s a carnival down at Crystal Palace Park. Let’s go there”

And with that, he intertwined his fingers with yours. The two of you have been dating for a while now, but this was a whole new experience. You never hugged, kissed or held hands out in public, but the feeling of not having to hide anymore was overwhelming.

————————————————

The both of you were sharing some candy floss at the carnival and giggling at a stupid joke, when a teenage girl pointed at Tom, screaming in excitement.

“Oh my god, it’s Tom Hiddleston! Can I have a picture with you, please?”

“Of course”, he said with a big smile on his face.

The girl handed her phone to her mother before she came running towards you. You wanted so step out of frame so that she could get a photo with your boyfriend, but instead Tom tightened the grip around your waist, pulled you closer to him and smiled into the camera. After a couple of pictures, he turned to her and started a conversation. You knew how much he enjoyed chatting with his fans, so you wandered off to give them a bit of privacy.

“You’re great in ‘The Night Manager’, I never miss an episode of it!”, the girl said, “and by the way, your girlfriend is very beautiful”

“I know, right? I’m a lucky man”, he looked at you while you watched the bumper cars a few feet away.

“You sure are. Anyway, thanks again for the picture! Have a great evening”, and with that, she walked off again.

You were eating the remaining candy floss by yourself, when Tom’s arm snaked around your waist. You turned around and looked up at him, before giving him a peck on the lips.

„I love the way you treat your fans. Promise me that it will never change, no matter how famous you get“, you said in a low voice.

„I promise, darling“, Tom answered and you smiled in response.

„The sun is about to go down. Let‘s go on the Ferris wheel and watch it“, you suggested.

„Didn‘t think you were such a hopeless romantic“, he grinned at you while wrapping his arm around your shoulder.

„I‘m full of surprises, you should know that by now“, you winked at him.

„I do, and I can‘t wait to see them all“

Lucky for you, there weren‘t many people standing in line for the Ferris wheel and after a few minutes, the two of you sat in a capsule 200 feet above the ground.

You were watching in awe, as the warm sunlight consumed all of London and the last sun rays sparkled on the surface of the Thames, but Tom was too distracted to notice any of it.

He rather watched the golden light illuminate your face, making you look like a goddess. There was this sparkle in your eyes when you smiled and even though Tom had his whole world right in front of him, you were completely unaware of your beauty, so he felt the need to change that.

„You‘re stunning, darling. I don‘t even know what I did to deserve you“, he said, his voice nothing more than a whisper. He brought your hand to his lips and placed a soft kiss on your knuckles, making you blush.

„I‘m so in love with you, Y/N“

You turned to him with a big smile on your face. Tom told you about his feelings before, but it wasn‘t a common thing. He was more about making you feel loved than just telling you every day. You respected that and the best part was that it made you feel even more special when he actually said it.

You reached out for his collar and pulled him towards you, before you pressed your lips against his. Tom‘s hands cupped your face as he smiled into the kiss, proud to be yours.

„I love you too, Tom“

„We should’ve made it public sooner, this is so much better“, he chuckled, before kissing you again.

#tom hiddleston #tom hiddleston x reader #tom hiddleston fanfic #tom hiddleston imagine #marvel x reader #tom hiddleston fluff

377 notes · View notes

goodnightkisseu · 6 years

Text

Ong Seongwu - Us (Then)

Genre: Fluff

Parts: [Part 1] [Part 2]

Note: In celebration of Ong’s birthday, I decided to write this fluff piece based off of the picture he posted on fancafe (that made my heart do like... 1,000,000 flips >///<) This will actually be part of a two-part series, the idea being that this was the relationship at the beginning, and part 2 will be about how it’s changed. I hope that it’s enjoyable for everyone!

And of course, a happy birthday to Ong! The one that got me into pd101 in the first place and ultimately got me back into writing. This blog wouldn’t be here without him!

Please enjoy and feel free to let me know what you think! ^^

- goodnightkisseu’s admin <3

‘Seongwu~ I know it’s been busy, but do you have some time to meet up today? It’s been a while and I think I miss you… ><’

As he read the message again, for maybe the tenth or twentieth time, he couldn’t help the goofy smile that spread on his features. It was simple message, yet, somehow, it made him so incredibly happy. His day had been pretty dull and this little message relaying that you missed him was enough to completely flip his mood. Though he was eager to answer right away, he took a step back and contemplated what he would say to you. He’d have to tease you, of course. He wouldn’t be himself if he didn’t do that.

‘Uh, excuse you. You think you miss me? You should miss me. After al,l I am the best boyfriend in the world.’

‘Anyway, I have today off. Let me know what you want to do. I’ll meet you at your place.’

He sent both messages before he started to rummage through his giant pile of clothes in his closet, looking for something clean to wear. Since it was his day off, he could forego the stuffy business attire and go for something a little more casual, like that black sweater that you always liked to steal from him.

Though he was trying to not get too excited for his own good, he couldn’t help but smile to himself at the thought of seeing you. It had been about a week and a half since the two of you had last met up. Busy schedules on his end and deadlines on yours had kept the two of you apart for a little longer than expected. And though Seongwu did want to see you, he also didn’t want to bother you. He gave you space, sending you the occasional message to make sure that you were okay. He even got you on the phone once, sometime in the middle of the week, just to make sure that you really were okay. You had told him that it was a bit difficult at the moment, but his messages and considerate actions were really helping you get through it. Though it hurt his heart to hear that you were having a bit of a hard time, he was glad that he was able to relieve some of your stress just by checking in on you.

Honestly, when Seongwu thought back on your relationship and how head over heels he was for you, it was almost surprising that the two of you were together for such a short amount of time. As of today… it had only been about three months? It was strange, and though cliché, the young man couldn’t imagine his life without you.

Truth be told, the two of you didn’t even meet in a very abnormal way. Yet, meeting you had changed him. That day, he had decided to go to the local café to get some of his work done. The office had gotten unusually loud, likely due to one of the projects coming to a close. Though that was normally fine, the sudden boom in noise at the office had made it hard to work. So Seongwu decided to seek out a more calming environment… and this café seemed like the best place to go. He had perched himself at one of the tables by the window, working away, when, during his break, you happened to catch his eye from a few tables away. He didn’t make a move initially, though he was struck by your beauty. The way that your hair cascaded and framed your face after you ran your fingers through it. The way your attire suited you perfectly, the right blend of semi-casual wear for a work day. The way that your lips curled into a smile as you talked on the phone. You were so attractive to him and Seongwu was going to leave it at that, as a chance encounter with a beautiful stranger.

Yet, something in him urged him to talk to you. As he sat there he felt like he was being drawn into you to the point where he was having a hard time focusing on his work. He decided that he wasn’t just going to leave this as a random encounter. He did want to talk to you, to get to know you. Though walking up to a complete stranger and introducing himself confidently was usually out of his normal comfort zone, he decided to push past that and try. When you ended your call, he picked up his laptop in one hand and his coffee in the other, walking over to you and asking if you wouldn’t mind sharing the table. He was kind, courteous and looking back on it, he might have even stuttered. But, from that moment on, the rest was history.

And here the two of you were, not necessarily a new couple, but still learning about each other, about your likes and dislikes. You would often talk about where you saw your lives leading you, trying to see if they matched up with where the other saw themselves in a few years’ time. You would have both deep and frivolous conversations, and though you didn’t always agree, there was one thing that you did both agree on. You came into each other’s lives at the right time. You gave each other someone that the other could depend on, and there was no way that either of you could have been happier.

After digging through about twenty shirts and eight pairs of pants, Seongwu had finally gotten changed and now found himself casually waiting outside of your apartment building, seated on one of the many benches that lined the walkway out of the building and onto the busy street. Normally he would have just headed up to your place, but when he had texted you on his way over, you had told him that you were just about ready and would meet him downstairs when you were done. He didn’t mind and took the time to check through his work messages, making sure that no one was in dire need of him. He didn’t take days off very often so in theory, nothing should have gone wrong.

Seongwu was so lost in his emails, trying to promptly write one back to his co-worker about where to find a certain set of files on the server, that he never heard the footsteps that approached him. It wasn’t until a finger gently made contact with his forehead and proceeded to push his head back that he finally snapped out of it to see who the perpetrator was. It was only then that he was met with the prettiest smile; yours. “Yah, when did you get here?” he asked, quickly moving to his feet, the height difference between the two of you more prominent now that he was standing upright.

“Not that long ago… maybe a couple of minutes? I called out to you, but you didn’t even reply,” you said a small pout forming on your lips. Ah, that hit him right in the heart. It was just too cute.

“Sorry about that. I just wanted to make sure that nothing was going on at work. I didn’t mean to ignore you, babe.”

“It’s really fine,” you said with a small giggle. “But… you seemed pretty deep in that email. I’m not pulling you away from anything, am I?” Your brow furrowed at your inquiry and he knew what you were thinking. One of your greatest concerns in the relationship was that you would be a bit of a burden to him. You knew that he was working his way up in the company, and was in a pretty prime spot to receive a promotion within the next year, so you were worried that your actions at times, could cost that for him. He always reassured you that this would never be the case, but there were definitely times like this when it came up, albeit subtler than during your deeper late night conversations.

He shook his head as he gently took your hand in his, the pair of you heading off onto the main street. “Naw, it should be fine? Everyone knows that I have today off and most have planned for it. Just a little something came up and I had to let Jaehwan know where to find some files. Thing with Jaehwan is, you have to be very specific about the instructions,” he explained, letting out a chuckle.

He watched as you hesitantly nodded, almost as if you didn’t fully believe him. “Alright… but… you’d tell me if you were busy, right? If I were pulling you away from something?” you asked, your eyes momentarily scanning his for any hint of a lie. The one thing that he knew that you had learned about him over the short duration of your relationship, was that he was a terrible liar, and you had gotten better at spotting it too.

And though he loved how considerate you were being, it could definitely be a little much at a time like now, when he had already squared everything away and the two of you were supposed to be enjoying a nice afternoon together. “Of course I would tell you if there was something pressing, but really, everything is fine today, I promise. Honestly, Jaehwan’s probably got it all sorted out by now,” he urged, lightly squeezing your hand.

“Anyway, you were the one that said that you might miss me and that you wanted to meet up. What does my love want to do today?” he asked, trying to get your mind off of the fact that you might have caused him some trouble at work. Honestly, it wasn’t all that dire. If there was a blocker, it could be handled tomorrow. His office was like that. There was no point in freaking out until it was definitely going to be a problem. Okay, maybe that wasn’t the best, but it worked for his company. “Or, did you just want to see my handsome face?”

You made a face, which only made his smile widen and caused you to roll your eyes. “I… I actually haven’t thought that far ahead yet,” you said, Seongwu quirking a brow and waiting for you to continue on with your explanation. “Fine, fine, I miss you, okay?” you admitted, making that smug smile appear on his lips. Sometimes that smug smile got on your nerves, but damn if he didn’t look handsome or cute every time he smiled though.

Seongwu leaned over, giving you a kiss on the side of your head, still chuckling and giddy. “See, that’s what I thought,” he replied. “But it’s okay… because I missed you too,” he confessed, placing another kiss in the same spot.

“Okay, okay,” you said, obviously not prepared for the onslaught of kisses, and particularly not in public. “But honestly, what are we going to do? We can’t just wander around without a destination…”

“Of course we can! I’m sure if we keep walking, we’ll find something to do eventually,” he pointed out as the two of you crossed the street. “Hey, how about we stop at the store on the corner and get a quick snack? That way if we decide to eat a little later we won’t get too hungry,” he suggested.

“You’re just saying that because you’ve been craving ice cream for the last week!” you retorted, following along as Seongwu dragged you into the familiar little store that you frequented whenever you needed a late night snack. It was just all too conveniently located for its own good.

Seongwu pretended to feign ignorance as the two of you walked around and looked for something small to eat. However, when you both passed the freezer drawers, filled to the brim with a wide assortment of ice cream, he didn’t even hesitant to pull out a chocolate covered chocolate ice cream bar. You gave him a look and he only shrugged. “I mean, I didn’t say that you were wrong.”

After your impromptu shopping trip, you left the store with ice cream and candy bar in hand as the two of you wandered down the street, deciding that you would go for a loop around the park before deciding on your next destination. You had stopped momentarily so that Seongwu could get rid of his wrapper, almost dropping the remainder of his ice cream on the ground in the process. You had long since finished your chocolate bar at this point and were walking in front of him, waiting for him to catch up with you.

However, as you watched your boyfriend, your brain started to take in the angle of the light, how it hit Seongwu in just the right ways. On instinct you reached into your pocket and pulled out your phone, bringing it up to just the right spot to capture a picture of him, just after he had turned around to face you. You were no master photographer by any means, but you knew that you couldn’t let such an opportunity disappear either.

The sound of your camera shutter snapped Seongwu out of his distress of almost dropping his chocolate treat. Did you just… did you just take a picture of him? “Babe, what did you just do?” he asked, his long strides bringing him to your side in a matter of seconds.

“Nothing,” you replied simply, trying to hide your phone behind your back. You loved taking candid pictures of Seongwu. Though he didn’t believe it, his looks absolutely shined in candid moments like that. And each time you took a picture of him, as cheesy as it sounded, you felt like you fell for him more with each one.

“I know you took a picture. Let me take a look at it. I want to make sure I look okay,” he said, trying to grab for your phone with his free hand, but ultimately missing and almost tripping as you moved away from him.

“Seongwu, I don’t even know why you’re so worried. You always look handsome,” you told him, though it didn’t stop him from trying to reach for it again, each swipe of his hand bringing him closer and closer to you, his strides extending to quickly close the distance between the two of you each time you moved away. You were about to turn tail and run when an arm wrapped itself around your waist, pulling you promptly against the individual behind you. Well, shit.

“Nowlemmeseethephone,” he mumbled with the ice cream bar between his lips, freeing up his other hand to grab your phone. He managed to take it from you and you stopped struggling, knowing that he had won your little game. He always won though, and you should have been angrier… but you were used to it. Instead you reached up and took his ice cream from between his lips, taking a bite of it yourself.

Seongwu worked to unlock your phone, putting in his birthday to do so, going straight to your pictures to see exactly what candid shot you had caught of him. If he were going to be honest… you were right. It was a pretty good picture. You really had a knack for this. “I guess it doesn’t look that bad…” he admitted slowly, knowing that he made a bigger deal out of it than he should have.

“I told you that you look fine,” you replied, Seongwu pouting when he realized that you had eaten most of the remainder of his ice cream.

“Hey, that was mine!”

“And you could have eaten the rest of it if you weren’t trying to see what you looked like,” you shot back, but instantly felt him pulling you closer.

“I won anyway…” he told you, gently whispering in your ear as he held you.

“And how so?” you asked, trying to pretend that his proximity to you wasn’t making your heart beat at a mile a minute.

“Because I got to hold you properly,” he said back, wrapping you a little tighter in his arms as he placed another kiss on the side of your head. You stayed in his hold for a bit, enjoying the fact that you finally got to be so close to him again, being able to just enjoy his presence, something that you hadn’t been able to do in so long. As head over heels as he was for you, you were equally so for him. When you finally decided that this was enough affection for the time being, you gently broke yourself from his hold and clung to his arm instead, as the two of you wandered around the park, looking for your next destination together…

#wanna one #ong seongwoo #ong seongwu #wanna one imagines #wanna one scenarios #kpop scenarios

74 notes · View notes

wannawrite · 6 years

Text

Hundredth - LYJ 2

who?: Nine Percent’s Lin Yanjun genre: 🌺 type: bullet point TW: toxic relationship blog navigator. part two / two

part one You love yanjun, I love yanjun. pls read part one first!! sorry for the lateness, school just started up again and it’s been so hectic :((( - admin l

disclaimer: pictures used do not belong to me and credit goes to their original owners everything that is written here is purely fictional DO NOT READ IF TRIGGERING

two things

one: you felt absolutely shitfaced

two: you dreamed about meeting a handsome dude and giving him your jewelry

losing money

fantastic

but hey, he was cute though

head sore, back aching and the urge to throw up all the alcohol consumed last night, you didn’t want to pry your memory for details

your dating life was now non-existent

that hurt

it was very real

and very tragic

the pain of realisation must’ve triggered your imagination to create your

ideal soulmate

tall

handsome

playful

sexy

all in one package

he was no Ken doll

not a trace of any of Yang’s characteristics

a scowl edged itself onto your face at the thought of your ex-fiancé

who was in Paris chasing the woman of his dreams, mind you

if only Evan was a real human and not some figment of your imagination

you would have married him in an instant

unfortunately, Evan was a mere hologram of your expectations

thus, you were doomed to stay single

your back hit the soft bed with a thump

sigh

I just want to go back to sleep

so Evan and I can keep meeting in our dreams

想要牵着你的手到我们的梦中梦游

wait!

this is still Yang’s apartment,,,that I used to call ‘home’

I lied to myself

he’ll be back from his ‘business trip’ tonight

I have to pack up and get the hell out of here!

f*ck, I wasted time daydreaming about something so useless

ouch! my head

what the hell! why can’t anything go my way for once

you groped around to find balance, vision distorted, dizziness settling into your brain

i’m never drinking again!

what happened last night?

.....did I?

so, I got drunk, drew up my little own Ken doll in my head

lost almost 250 million worth of gems that aren’t mine

your face began to flush red

lol at least Yang won’t have them either

he designed that entire collection with her in his head

that aside, I’m never getting drunk again

carelessly, your hand swept over the bedside table

effectively knocking over most of the items

indistinct clinks and clatters filled the empty space

then, a soft ping of a tiny item hitting the carpeted ground caught your attention

squinting against the sunlight, your eyes searched for the object

even though it was mildly damaging to your retinas, the sunlight caused the object to sparkle

your hands curved around the smooth metal

fingers traced the distinctive carvings along the band

Cartier

upon closer inspection, you noticed that there was a strip of paper wrapped around it

cautiously, you unwrapped it

‘I’m sorry’ was scrawled on the paper

it made your breath hitch in your throat

who was apologising?

what for?

‘Don’t worry, things will start looking up from here. - E’

E v a n

your hands began to shake uncontrollably

either in excitement or anxiety - you weren’t sure

evan was real

he had returned your Cartier bracelet

at least he had kept your damned engagement ring

throw it out or whatever, you didn’t care about that chunk of space rock anymore

hopefully, Evan had burned in it an incinerator

hopefully, he would run back to slip a new one on your finger

NO!

lmao you just swore off relationships yesterday

and now you’re desperate for a guy to sweep you off your feet

but this wasn’t just any guy

he was your guy

your dream guy

drunk or not, you knew he was a 12/10 personality wise

or maybe,,,you just haven’t met anyone befitting of your standards

tbh idk if that’s grammatically correct

were you just desperate because of a broken heart?

god no

Yang didn’t deserve your prized heart

Evan though…

Was he a real, breathing man with blood flowing through his veins and sunlight gracing his skin?

Could he be the person you had been looking for?

Would you ever have a future together?

There were just too many questions

and too few answers

but what were the chances of you ever meeting Evan again?

what were the odds of him coming back into your life again?

outside of your dreamland

There was absolutely no guarantee that this note was genuine too

Someone could just be pulling a gross prank

Maybe there was a thief and he had just pretended to be Evan

had you been robbed last night?

NO I’M THINKING TOO FAR

Evan is off limits since he’s currently still a fictional dude

besides, it would be creepy to just keep dreaming about this guy

if he even exists

This itself is creepy...only because I can’t remember anything

a shudder shook your shoulders as you clambered off the bed

your mind had to be made

right now

two things:

No, I won’t go searching for him

Yes, I’ll quit thinking about him

or anyone for that matter

It’s about time I enjoy my life while single and youthful

Time to pack up my things

Leave this apartment

the Cartier bracelet slid onto your wrist perfectly

this,,,you would keep closely

you marched out of the building with confidence in your stride

even your bags were tugged with strength and determination

no more Yang

no more Evan

no more relationships

...for some time at least

just me, I’m content being single

however, if you had been honest with yourself

your heart would not begin to tug your brain in the opposite direction

‘I lied when I said this necklace was worth 17 million,’ Cheng Xiao revealed.

‘It’s that value multiplied by nine.

A hundred and fifty-three million dollar necklace

and that amount would double after the deal was sealed

Yanjun’s guilty conscience began to awake

he,,,stole close to 250 million in an unfair squabble

The nine leaders surrounding the table were clearly shocked by the discovery

Cheng Xiao chuckled

She knew those boys wouldn’t bother to wholly invest themselves in the jewelry

The necklace was not theirs to keep anyway

It was a mere pawn in this game

There was 0.00% chance that YingYang Gems would continue their showcase

the necklace was supposed to debut in that collection

looks like they had to wait until Hundredths returned the gems

more likely than not, YingYang Gems would be forced to pull a plug on the showcase

which would give Yuehua Jewellers the window to be the only top-tier jewelry debuting a new collection this month

Hundredths held a huge amount of shares in Yuehua Jewellers

believe me, I did research on this

Cheng Xiao was not going to lose them all

‘Once their stock market rises, so will our shares,’ Cheng Xiao explained, gesturing to a chart. ‘Jieqiong will decide when to buy and sell.’

Yanjun didn’t understand the specifics mentioned but he got the rough idea

sort of

he left issues like these to Xukun, Linong

Cheng Xiao and Xukun continued to explain and discuss the situation

Yanjun tuned out to most of it

His job was done

he felt that he no longer wanted to play a part in this particular operation

He just felt so damn stupid for allowing his feelings to get caught up in his work

Yanjun felt like leaving the meeting room but he dug his heels into the carpet, forcing himself to stay

His work was constantly emotionally and physically draining, yes

but never like this

Cheng Xiao glanced at the clock on the wall

‘Okay. That’s all for today. We’ll discuss further when there’s an update from YingYang or Yuehua. Good work!’

Yanjun smiled and clapped along with everyone

He was genuinely proud and happy for his mentor and fellow comrades

It was just his own emotions that got in the way

‘I want to praise Yanjun for doing such an excellent job at acquiring the goods. An applause for him please! Bro did well,’ Xukun suddenly announced.

He had good intentions - Yanjun could tell by the look in his eyes

Xukun meant well

his friends praised him with good wishes and slaps on the back

The more attention and recognition he received, the nauseous feeling only grew

Yanjun finally caught a breath when he slipped out of the meeting room and headed towards the gymnasium

at this hour, the gym would usually have one or two athletes exercising

it was an awkward hour between late lunch and early dinner time

true enough, Ziyi and Yuntian were the only two in the huge complex

Yuntian as in Zhu Yuntian, 1/2 on the slept on Zhu twins

‘Hey bro,’ Ziyi greeted warmly as Yanjun stepped into the gym.

Yuntian smiled from his place on a weight machine

‘It’s great you’re keeping to your workout schedule,’ Ziyi beamed. ‘That ensures you’re always healthy for more missions like these.’

‘And hopefully a daily dose of endorphins keep that scowl off your face,’ Yuntian joked

that managed to crack a small smile from Yanjun

Yanjun began to stretch as a warm up

‘Jun, you did well. You’re happy with yourself, aren’t you?’

Yanjun’s mouth went dry, he pressed his lips together

‘Of course, all of us worked hard for this mission,’ he forced the words out through gritted teeth

brainwashing himself to focus on the benefits was harder than imagined

Ziyi furrowed his thick brows

‘I-it’s j-just...you seem to be a bit glum and undermining yourself. I want you to know how great you performed.’

Ziyi

‘It must’ve been so difficult getting in there,’

Please

‘Especially when Zhangjing and I went offline and you were left by yourself,’

Stop

‘I realised how much you’ve improved and I must commend you on that,’

Talking

‘Yanjun, you’re so amazing-‘

‘ZIYI!’ Yanjun finally exploded

He didn’t mean to

truly

Ziyi was going what he thought would uplift Yanjun, it’s what any good friend would do

shocked by his outburst, Ziyi stumbled back, losing his composure

even Yuntian stopped his exercise to find out what had happened

Yanjun bit down hard on his lips

he had to calm down before he spoke

otherwise, a dear friend could be hurt by his words

His words had already taken away many things

He wasn’t about to lose his dear friend

‘Ziyi, I’m sorry I reacted that way,’ Yanjun began by apologising

he gripped onto Ziyi’s shoulders but not in a domineering manner

he just had to ensure his best friend wouldn’t slip away

Yanjun sighed. ‘I-I’ve just been worn out from this mission and I’m trying to think of other things.’

Ziyi nodded. ‘Of course, of course.’

ways to cheer Ziyi up

clogs in his brain reeled to find an appropriate solution

‘You know, let’s take a break and get a coffee from the nearby cafe.’

manwhore: I know you stole my new collection. Return it to me, or you’ll pay

manwhore: don’t think for a minute that I won’t press charges

hiss hiss hoe: there’s evidence you left MY apartment with a big ass suitcase

hiss hiss hoe: you can’t possibly have that many things just own up that you took the collection and I’ll drop the charges

hiss hiss snake: listen, call my lawyer by 10pm today and all is even

just reading your messed up texts gets my blood boiling

dumbass

you: I don’t take shit that doesn’t mean anything to me

you: you’ve got the wrong person

you: the apartment was already wrecked when I got there and whoever was there had left ages ago

*snake is calling*

*call declined*

*snake is calling*

*call declined*

*snake is calling*

‘What!’ you snapped, causing customers seated around you to divert their attention.

‘What the hell do you want? I don’t want anything to do with you!’

‘You know what I want,’ your ex-fiancé’s voice crackled. ‘I want you to return my collection by today or I’m going ahead with the police.’

‘I didn’t take your shit,’ you growled in frustration, exasperated. ‘I’m not playing childish games here, Yang.’

yes, I wore the jewelry but when I woke up only my Cartier bracelet was left

I genuinely don’t know what happened!

but it isn’t my problem

Yang sighed from the other end of the line, most likely in annoyance. ‘Fine, be like that. I’m coming over to your townhouse with my lawyer to negotiate. Don’t drag our parents into this, you’ve already delayed the launch. That’s enough from you.’

the line went dead on the other side before you had a chance to protest

your phone thudded onto the table as you buried your head in your hands

in the queue, Yanjun, Yuntian, and Ziyi were well aware of your situation

their keen ears had heard it all

‘What are we going to do?’ Yanjun hissed. ‘We can’t let Yang do this.’

‘Honestly, I don’t think there’s much we can do at this point.’ Yuntian looked uncertain, shaking his head.

‘But if we allow Yang to press charges and call the police, we’re at a bigger risk of being found out. How did he get back from Paris so fast?’

oh no

Ziyi shot him a strange look. ‘Paris? I know he was due back tonight but wasn’t he in the city the whole time?’

cover blown

‘Jun ge, a-are you hiding something from us?’ Yuntian asked

Ziyi sipped his mocha latte,

‘Okay,’ Yanjun said. ‘Let me explain.’

it was hard to whisper in hushed tones through their masks AND with the person in question sitting less than 5 tables away

also, Ziyi and Yuntian weren’t the most helpful by ‘oohing’ and ‘ahhing’ at Yanjun’s every word

once he was done with his storytelling, the table went silent as they were all deep in thought

Ziyi huffed, feeling clueless as to what to do

‘We have to help them for the sake of protecting ourselves,’ he voiced after awhile

Yuntian and Yanjun nodded attentively

‘Okay,’ Ziyi muttered after a while. ‘I have a plan.’

when Ziyi said he had a plan...I didn’t think we were going to be waiting outside their townhouse

stalking is more of an accurate choice of words

this is so stupid,,,and creepy

but what else could we really do

Zhangjing had already gotten their information

Ziyi had said that Yang’s force would definitely pressure you into accepting his offer

and that was when the Hundredths came in

they were going to pretend to be Yuehua representatives and lawyers whatever role they could find

if you know YingYang Gems, you certainly know how Yuehua Jewellers is pitted against them

the townhouse seemed compact and cozy yet modern and elegant

clearly, it had not been lived in for a very long time

in fact, the only occupants were the monthly housemaids

Yanjun spotted your shoes strewn across the porch, a sign of your hasty arrival and departure to get coffee

from a mile away, Yuntian announced your arrival

unfortunately, a black Mercedes Benz was quickly making its way down the lane too

too fast if Yanjun may add

Yang on one end

you on the other

this wasn’t going to be pretty

Yanjun braced himself for a hissy fight

Probably most of the pettiness from YingYang

as expected, Yang’s car reached first

his car ignored the trio, nearly crashing into them

a polished, suited driver stepped out of the car to punch a code into the keypad

red began to shade his cheeks when the gate let out an alarming buzz, signaling the password was wrong

furious, Yang stuck his head out of the window and barked, ‘What! They changed the password! Not like that would stop me! Try again!’

then, he noticed Yuntian, Ziyi, and Yanjun

his lips curled into a nasty sneer

‘Who are you? Get away from my house!’ He snarled defensively

Yanjun had to bite his lips to stop the laughter

‘If it is indeed your house,’ Ziyi began smoothly, mockingly almost. ‘Wouldn’t you know the password?’

Yang’s temper only blew up, his face reddened in anger. ‘Of course, I do! My fiancé must’ve changed the password, thieves these days....I’ll contact them right now! Off my property! My lawyer is sitting in my car.’

so many ‘my’s, Yanjujn rolled his eyes

Yang ordered his driver to try again and even suggested breaking in

‘I don’t think you break into houses you call your own,’ Yanjun snapped, unable to take any more of his insolence.

Especially since he had heard your side of the story

Yang’s current behaviour only confirmed his suspicions

his shirt was made out of 100% dickhead material

‘What’s going on?’

three strangers, one shiny black all-too-familiar car with two all-too-familiar passengers were parked right in front of your house

‘Darling!’ Yang’s fake sugary tone made you want to throw hot coffee in his face

‘I was trying to stop these...these hooligans! from breaking into our house.’

the blood rushing through your veins began to boil like a tempest

‘The only hooligan here is you. We’re done, get away from my property,’ you fired back. ‘Leave my representatives alone!’

the company of three strangers seemed much better than his at that moment

guys, idw to be that person, but please do be careful around people you don’t know

suddenly, the window rolled down to reveal a woman sitting in the back seat

Yanjun’s breath hitched in his throat when he spotted the giant rock on her ring finger

‘Sweetheart,’ she shrieked. ‘Are we done here yet? I want to head inside, sort out this lawyer thing and go shopping for our wedding already.’

the sobs you choked back were so visible to Yanjun. You were trying your best to keep your emotions a bay

it wasn’t only your anger but his

‘Wow, Mr Yang I will say you have guts to act this way,’ he growled. ‘Our client has just parted ways with you after two years of engagement and more of betrothal without the slightest bit of a wedding in mind.’

‘And here you are, already planning a dream wedding to someone you’ve met a week ago after cruelly ditching your ex. Then, you have the audacity to accuse them, force them to meet your lawyer at their house, claiming the house was yours.’

Yang opened his mouth to reply but Yanjun didn’t even spare him a second to shut it

‘And you bring your new fiancé along to humiliate my client. If it truly is a legal matter between the two of you like you claim it to be, her presence isn’t required.’

your jaw dropped open and shut many times and you couldn’t stop thinking about how this mysterious man looked so,,, familiar

Recognisable

but you had to save your pride right now. ‘You’ve met my representatives, we’re here for a meeting. Go before I call the police.’

‘This house is in my name.’

Thankfully, the car sped off without another word from the passengers

your jelly legs sank on the pavement, breathes coming out in short bursts

‘T-thanks the help,’ you whispered. ‘D-do I know you from somewhere?’

Yanjun shook his head, eyes sparkling

he offered to help you up

‘Unfortunately not but, we’re here to help you.’

He had a smooth way of talking, you noted. Bad sign, bad sign. All the charming ones will are heartbreaking bad boys

but isn’t that a trait of your Ken doll Evan?

the raven-haired, man bun sporting man cleared his throat and stepped forward

‘We’re representatives from Yuehua Jewellers and there are some issues we would like to discuss regarding YingYang Gems.’

if they were Yuehua, they had to take your side

three strangers in your house isn’t a problem when you have about ten bodyguards inside

the gate let out a friendly beep and slid open without trouble after you had keyed in the password

‘If it’s about boycotting Yang,’ you said, gesturing for them to enter. ‘Then, be my guest.’

The ‘meeting’ was successful on both terms

Yanjun couldn’t be more ecstatic that you were finally getting away from Yang - at least for a while

but he had to keep his true identity a secret at all times, no matter what

However, the ‘subtle, casual’ looks that you gave him didn’t go unnoticed at all

it was SO obvious that your brain was reeling to provide answers to your burning questions

my last three brain cells during an exam:

as much as Yanjun wanted to answer them himself, he restrained himself from doing so

Now, you only knew him as Jun

That was how it was supposed to stay

but Yanjun wasn’t sure if his heart would allow it

…

did,,, did he really admit that?

he can’t

emotions and work don’t match, it would only complicate things

yet, he would surely crumble if you pressed any further

in order to protect himself, to protect his brothers and to protect you, Yanjun stayed far far away from you

he sent relatively harmless people out to meet and update you

you only held Ziyi’s contact

Yanjun was doing all this to keep you safe

from him

but it was the smallest of details that gave away his attraction

like how he pestered Cheng Xiao for an update on the transaction every hour

or how he snuck glances over Ziyi’s shoulder when he was texting you

he also snuck out with zheng ruibin to keep tabs on Yang, to ensure he was no longer harassing you

dread was gnawing at him from all sides

he felt as if eyes were glaring bullet holes into him even in the safety of his room

Yanjun lay on his bed, ears tuned into the goodnight wishes of his corridor mates

he had to sort out his life right now

first of all, he had gotten all heart-eyed when he met you and then charmed away your jewelry

he felt guilty for worsening your emotional breakdown AND for letting his own emotions get in the way of his work

now, he was trying to solve your problem

but Yanjun wasn’t going to waltz into your life, sweep you off your feet and propose to you

because he knew he didn’t deserve to

either way, he can’t satisfy both sides of a Gemini

Yanjun was not mistaking pity for attraction, he was schooled enough to know that

he wasn’t going to f*ck up your life and feelings more than he already had

Yanjun was placed in a tight spot

knowing him would only put you in more danger

so no matter what happened, for the sake of your sanity and safety

He had to withstand the pressure crushing his shoulders, go against the wind and grow against the sun

only diamonds come out of the rough

A Hundredth had no excuse not to

two days later, Yang’s collection was returned safely and anonymously

the launch continued

but by then, Yuehua had garnered the majority of the media’s attention and public eye

beneficial

today was essentially your last chance to get rid of the thought that bugged your mind

Jun

Evan

why did both of them seem so,,, alike?

to clear up things, you decided that there was indeed a guy named Evan in your life

and the idea of it was absolutely mortifying

curiosity killed the cat,,,but the cat does have nine lives

if you did indeed dump your problems and jewelry through your mini cryfest on some poor dude, you had the right to know

from the start, YH representative Jun had caught your eye

he was calculating, cheeky, playful and intelligent all together

he also reminded you of someone

personality wise

you remembered Evan had a light silvery tint to his hair, a pair of dimples, deep voice and large eyes

your ideal ‘Ken doll’

Jun was definitely your type

nevermind, Evan didn’t have to exist if you had Jun

had

you wouldn’t ever be able to breathe the same air as him

Jun was slowly slipping away from you

in fact, the last time you heard of his existence was yesterday night

when Zacharie was texting you and mentioned a component that Jun would manage

take the Z from Ziyi and IE from Boogie and you get Zacharie

trying to make up fake names on the spot

there were so many burning questions at the tip of your tongue

Jun resembled Evan so closely

,,,were you confusing reality and fiction? are you going mad?

annoyed, you let out a huff and flopped onto your bed

men could be so infuriating and irritating!

you: hi Zacharie, thank you for all your help these few days. Please thank the team at Yuehua on my behalf. To properly bid you farewell, I ordered some small gifts for the office. It would be great if you could send someone to pick them up! Thanks!

mhm

Zacharie and Jun won’t even know what hit them

truthfully, you didn’t have any farewell gifts because you never wanted to part

you: assistant lu please prepare appropriate tokens of appreciation for colleagues by 2pm today

why why why why why!

the same mantra kept chanting over and over in Yanjun’s head

he had been so desperately trying to avoid you at all costs yet here he was, at your front gate

Ziyi had specifically said this errand was for him to run

currently, the only running Yanjun wanted to do was to run away from his responsibilities

to his surprise, it was you who opened the door and not your bodyguard

‘Hi! Come in for a minute,’ you greeted enthusiastically

Yanjun wondered how you could be so bubbly

well, you had the right to be after getting Yang off your back

‘Everything’s in here!’ you beamed, handing him paper bags with stamped with a brand name you couldn’t even pronounce

Yanjun smiled earnestly, taking the bags from you

your fingers brushed against his for a moment and sparks ignited through your body

‘Jun, would you something to drink? Coffee perhaps?’

Wow, every word you said sounded so formal and robotic

this was very unlike you

were you nervous? around a guy?

Never!

then again, the only guys you had encountered were the middle school boyfriend, college cheater, and Yang

so,,,that was a possibility

Yanjun politely declined much to your dismay

He mentioned that Zacharie needed him back at the office for a board meeting soon

sighing, you nodded understandingly

‘Sure, you should get going soon. Thanks for all the help these few days.’

you ran a hand through your hair as you spoke

Yanjun caught sight of the Cartier bracelet securely clasped on your wrist

the one piece he decided not to steal

‘Nice Cartier,’ he complimented. ‘Very classy and iconic.’

damn Yanjun, you’re the smoothest guy on this planet and all you come up with is ‘nice Cartier’?

impressive

however, you face practically lit up at his compliment

‘Thank you! It was the first piece I bought with my own money,’ you revealed with pride.

Yanjun paused at the driveway to slip his shoes back on

which gave you time to work up the courage

‘Hey, Jun.’

he hummed in reply

you tried to make your tone sound as nonchalant as possible. ‘Uh, I figured you would be in touch with many of these... jewelry specialists...’

oh no

Yanjun tried not to tense visibly. Instead, he offered a tight-lipped smile

‘Um, I know this is far-fetched but would you know of anyone named Evan?’

E v a n

Evan is standing right in front of you

In your doorway

Evan is lying

Right in your face

Evan doesn’t deserve you

Because he messed up

Yanjun shook his head and pushed back the whirlwind of emotions that was taking shape

‘Nope, I’m sorry. I don’t know anyone of that name,’ he lied perfectly. ‘Why?’

Oh, the audacity

you leaned against the doorframe, mildly disappointed

‘Nothing. H-he just seemed really knowledgeable about gems. My cousin and I met him at...at a place near your office so I just-‘ you kept yourself from rambling.

the silver-haired man chuckled softly at your outburst

‘Y-you just resembled him a bit. Tall, tan, dyed hair, large eyes. Haha, thought he was a colleague or something,’ you fibbed, making up a story on the spot

sadness flooded your lungs and made it hard to breathe, fires of vex scorched your skin and made it blister

Jun obviously had no interest and to compare him with Evan! oh wow

who even does this

the moment would’ve turned awkward if Jun didn’t announce that Zacharie had begun texting him and bid you farewell with sincerity

there was no need to rush

he could explain everything

but what good would it do him

what good would it do you?

‘Jun!’ you called out as he was about to step outside, dashing after him without slippers

‘I-i-is it okay i-if we stay in contact? I-I-. Can we b-be friends? We’re around the same age? It’ll be nice to know someone nearby.’

sentences began with stammers and ended with stumbles

alarm bells rang in his head

Flustered, Jun fought to find an appropriate response

Words got caught in his throat, they froze, then evaporated into thin air

‘Yes,’ he finally coughed out. ‘We can stay in contact but...I think it would be much better for us to stay as colleagues.’

hurt crumbled your features no matter how hard you forced them to stay upright

‘Oh, o-of course.’

of course, you had been too immature, too caught up in the moment

too fresh from a breakup and looking in the wrong places for a rebound

Yanjun’s smile seemed sympathetic but he too was struggling to keep his feelings at bay

‘Goodbye. I’m sure there will be projects for us to work on again. Rest early.’

In the safety of Hundredth HQ, Yanjun let crystal tears slip out from his pearl-like orbs

usually gleaming with fun, suavity, perfection

the mafia had made him focused, strong, bold and quick

and it was your diamonds that didn’t just scratch the surface of the onyx plating

but pierced right through it and pricked his soft golden heart

honestly, i’m not super satisfied with this :(((

it took me THREE weeks to write but it was interrupted by camp and school so my train of thought was lost

i’M SO SORRY

hopefully,,,school gets easier so I can focus on what I like to do

love all of you lots💓💓💓

#admin l #nine percent #nine percent scenarios #idol producer #idol producer scenarios #lin yanjun #cai xukun #chen linong #fan cheng cheng #justin huang #huang minghao #zhu zhengting #wang ziyi #wang linkai #xiao gui #you zhangjing

24 notes · View notes

a-splash-of-stucky · 7 years

Text

Interrupted [1/3]

Pairing: Bucky x Steve || Bucky x Steve x Reader

Summary: You walk in on a private moment, forcing the three of you to have an awkward conversation.

Warnings: Language, M/M action, bondage, female masturbation, oral sex (m/r and f/r), threesome.

A/N: This is a re-post. Originally written as my entry for this writing challenge and posted on my other blog.

My prompt was “Okay…but seriously what the hell is going on?”, which I have put in bold somewhere in the story. Enjoy!

[1] [2] [3] || My Masterlist

“Ms Y/L/N?”

“Yes, FRIDAY?” you reply, setting the book you’d been reading down on your bedside table.

“Boss is requesting your presence in his lab. Captain Rogers and Sergeant Barnes have returned from their mission,”.

“Ah, right, thanks FRIDAY, I’ll be there soon,”, you say, swinging your legs off the bed and sliding your feet into your shoes.

For the past three years, you’d been working as Tony Stark’s glorified lab assistant.You’d dealt with everything from dousing his fires, to testing his prototypes, to de-bugging his software, and, as in today’s case, sifting though terabytes of data, deciding what should be stored within his database, and what to get rid of. Steve and Bucky had been sent to infiltrate an abandoned Roxxon Oil base on the coast of Brazil. Their mission was to break into the server room and retrieve all the data they could possibly get their hands on. The team had reason to suspect that Roxxon Oil had been acquiring huge sums of money via less than honest means — namely, the development and trade of WMDs — and needed as much info on the company’s history as they could get.

You bounce into Tony’s lab and grab a Stark tablet off one of the worktops, before coming to stand by his side. “Hey Twinkle-pop,” he greets, not bothering to look up from whatever it is he’s tinkering with, “Romanoff’s just delivered the Stark-drive they took on the mission, it’s over there somewhere,” he says, waving vaguely towards the right side of the room. “Take a look at it and start…doing whatever you need to do,”.

“What exactly am I looking for?” you ask, wandering between the tables, keeping an eye out for the sleek, black hard-drive. You crow in triumph when you see it balanced precariously on top of an enormous stack of papers.

“Uh…transfers of huge funds, mentions of weapons, anything…suspicious looking,” Tony mumbles, brow furrowing in concentration as he picks up a pair of tweezers and starts poking at his latest invention. Figuring you’re not going to get much more out of him, you plop yourself onto a stool and connect the Stark-drive to your tablet, so that you can transfer the files into FRIDAY’s system and start working through them.

“Heavily encrypted,” you announce.

“Can you handle it?” Tony asks, his tone distracted, suggesting that he’s only half-paying attention to you.

You snort indignantly. “‘Can I handle it?’ he asks. What am I, an amateur?” you grumble, fingers already tapping away at the screen as you blast through the meagre security measures put in place. A frown comes over your face when you glance at the file-transfer progress bar. “Tony? You sure this is all we got? Looks like only about half the size we were expecting,”.

“Hmm?” says Tony, not hearing you, focused as he in on wiring up his gadget.

You groan frustratedly, looking back at the tablet in your hands and chewing at your bottom lip as you deliberate your next action. Maybe a visit to Steve is in order. If you can figure out how he and Bucky got ahold of their files, or at least get an idea of what kind of equipment they were dealing with, you can determine whether or not they successfully retrieved all the data.

“Tony, I’m gonna go talk to Steve about this, okay?” you say, as you turn off your Stark tablet and get up from your stool.

Tony waves a hand at you offhandedly. “Yeah, sure, go ahead,” he replies, “Say hi to Cap for me, will ya? Haven’t seen him all day,”.

“That’s because you’ve been holed up in this place all day,” you mutter, pulling your phone and earphones out of your hoodie pocket and slipping them into your ears. Steve and Bucky’s shared apartment is literally located in the farthest fucking corner of the compound there is, so you walk at a brisk pace to get there, nodding your head to the beat of the song blaring in your ears.

When you get to their door, you don’t bother knocking, as the three of you are prone to showing up unannounced at each other’s room at any give time. Your little trio has developed such an easy-going friendship in the time you’ve known each other, that it’s second nature for you, by now, turning the handle and pushing the door open, as you pull your earphones out of your ears.

You wish that you had knocked, though.

Because what greets you on the other side shocks the living daylights out of you.

Who knew Bucky Barnes was into bondage?

He’s completely naked, save for the blue cord snaking its way around his body, its bright hue contrasting beautifully against the red flush of his skin. Intricate knots bind his arms behind his back and his legs into a kneeling position — there is even a coil of blue around his cock. Your eyes can’t help but linger on that part of his body for a beat too long. It’s hard, flushed obscenely red and curving towards his belly, the tip glistening wet. Despite the absurdity of the situation, the image causes arousal to flare in your loins.

What a glorious cock it is.

If you’re honest with yourself, you’ve had a crush on Bucky for as long as you’ve known him. Seeing him wield his knives with such precision and confidence in the training room never fails to make you weak in the knees. To your shame, you’ve caught yourself thinking about him naked and in bed with you on more than one occasion — though this scenario had never come to mind.

There’s more to the scene in front of you (as if the sight of Bucky tied up and on his knees wasn’t enough?). Bucky is kneeling in front of Steve, who is sitting on a wooden chair, still decked out in his full stealth suit, minus the shield and the helmet. You might not suspect that anything was amiss, if it weren’t for the fact that he’s got his cock out with Bucky’s lips wrapped around it.

Again, your brain is torn. Part of you is wondering what the fuck is going on, and the other half of you craves to join Bucky, maybe even take his place. You’ve always had a thing for the Cap. It’s not often that you meet a man that looks like a freaking god, who also is a genuinely nice guy. And really, who can resist Steve when he’s got the stealth suit on? Clearly not Bucky, that’s for sure.

Never, in the entire time that you’ve known Steve and Bucky, did you ever suspect that their relationship was anything beyond platonic. You — and quite probably, everyone else on the team — never would’ve guessed that they were more than close friends. The situation in front of you suggests otherwise. You have nothing against them being together, as you are a firm believer that love is love, at the end of the day, but…you’re a little unsettled by this revelation, nonetheless.

But that’s more to do with the way in which you stumbled across this piece information, than anything else.

A long, drawn out moan from Steve draws your attention back to the moment. He’s thrown his head back, exposing the pink blush coating his cheeks and neck. His eyes are shut tight, though his jaw is slack, quiet whimpers falling from his parted lips. Bucky’s mouth is near the base of his cock and whatever it is he’s doing, Steve is enjoying it.

“Damn, baby,” Steve rasps, licking his lips, as Bucky bobs his mouth up and down Steve’s shaft, “F-fuck, ohh god, yes,”.

Bucky moans — and god if there ever was ever a sound to bring you to your knees, it’d be that — preening at the praise, looking utterly debauched but completely at peace with himself. Steve cards his fingers through Bucky’s sweaty hair, smoothing back the tendrils clinging to his temples. When Steve runs his thumb over Bucky’s cheekbone, the latter leans into the touch, almost nuzzling into Steve’s palm.

It’s then that you realise that this is so much more than just a blowjob; trust Steve and Bucky to turn a suckjob into something intimate, and private, and tender. A part of you wants to stay and gawk at these two for as long as you can, but you squash those urges down, feeling utterly guilty for what you have already witnessed. This is not something you’re privileged enough to see. This is not a moment that you can share with them.

And of course, just as you think that, Bucky’s eyes slide open and travel over the room, landing straight on you. You freeze in shock, heat flooding your cheeks because you’ve just been caught snooping on them. Bucky hastily rips his mouth off Steve’s dick.

“You didn’t lock the door?!” he hisses.

Steve, bless him, is still in his little sex daze, and takes a while to catch on to Bucky’s words. When he tracks Bucky’s line of sight and sees you, the pink flush on his face deepens to a bright scarlet. “I—I—well—y-you,” he stutters helplessly.

“Genius,” Bucky gripes. If the moment weren’t so awkward, you’d join in and make your own snide comment towards Steve.

“Not my fault!” Steve protests, “I—well, your hand was—,”

“No!” you interrupt, finally forcing yourself to turn away and pull the door shut, “I don’t wanna hear about where anyone’s hand was, thank you very much,”.

“Y/N!” Steve calls. You pause, half out the door, “Please come in, let’s…let’s talk?”

You swallow nervously. “Steve, uh…I’d rather you just…do whatever it is you were doing. Don’t—don’t let me ruin the mood,”.

Bucky snorts, and in your mind, you can clearly envision his eye roll as he mutters, “Too late for that,”.

“Bucky,” Steve sighs frustratedly, “Y/N, please let’s—let’s talk, I can’t—,”.

“Steve, Bucky is naked in the middle of your living room right now,” you interrupt, “I’d rather not have this conversation at this moment, so…why don’t you two get dressed and come to my room,”. From the silence that follows, you can only imagine that the two of them are sharing a look.

“She’s got a point, Stevie,” Bucky murmurs. Then, raising his voice, he calls to you, “Y/N? Sweetie, just head over to your room, we’ll see you there,”.

“Sure thing. Take—take all the time you need,”, you reply, shutting the door behind you.

——————

After practically sprinting back to your room, you make a beeline for the ensuite.You turn on the sink and splash some cold water onto your face, hoping that it’ll calm you down, somewhat. Your heart is racing, but you’re pretty sure that that’s not only because you’ve just run all the way here. Arousal is pooling in your gut, the image of Bucky on his knees for Steve forever burnished into your memory. As ashamed as you might feel, you know that that visual is going to stimulate many ‘personal relief’ sessions in the weeks to come. You clench your thighs together, hoping to take the edge off the pressure building between them, but your efforts are fruitless. With a resigned sigh, you turn off the tap and head into your room, sitting down on your bed and curling yourself against the headboard.

Not ten minutes later, the door to your room bursts open — it seems that your little fiasco earlier hasn’t instilled good practices in either of them — and Bucky comes traipsing in, a more subdued Steve sidling in after him.

“C’mere, sit on the bed,” you murmur, motioning towards the empty space beside you. At your invitation, Bucky promptly flops down at the foot of the bed, twisting onto his side and propping his head up on one hand. Steve, more reserved, chooses to remain standing.

A terse silence falls over the room, each of you waiting for someone else to kick-off what will undoubtedly be a very uncomfortable conversation. When it becomes clear than neither of them are stepping up to the task, you decide to bite the bullet.

“We—what did I just see?” you ask, fiddling with the strings on your hoodie, because you don’t really want to look at either of them right now.

“That was me giving Stevie here one helluva blowjob,” Bucky deadpans, the corner of his mouth crooking up into a cocky smirk.

“Bucky!” Steve says exasperatedly.

You roll your eyes at the two of them, but that little exchange seems to have broken the ice. Bucky’s teasing has lightened the mood in the room by only a fraction, but you’ll take what you can get. “Okay…but seriously, what the hell is going on? Between you two, I mean,” you add, gesturing between them, “Are you…a couple? Was that a regular occurrence kinda thing, or…”

You purposefully allow your voice to trail off, hoping that one of the boys will pick up the slack. Steve is shifting his weight from foot to foot agitatedly, glaring at the floor as if he wants it to swallow him whole. Bucky’s posture on the bed is still relaxed, but his expression is the complete opposite — brows knitted together, bottom lip drawn between his teeth. It’s an expression that tells you that he would rather be anywhere but here.

“Okay, look, Y/N,” Steve begins, “You can’t—you can’t tell anyone about this,”. You arch an eyebrow questioningly. “I—we’re…not…ready to tell anyone about…us,”, he explains haltingly.

“So there is an ‘us’?” you ask, your gaze flitting from one person to the other.

Steve opens his mouth to speak, but Bucky cuts in at the last second. “Yes, Y/N, there is an ‘us’, and has been an ‘us’ for as long as we’ve known each other, pretty much,” he says, shrugging indifferently. “But Steve’s Captain America and—,”.

“—and the America public might not react very well to their patriotic idol being gay,” Steve interjects, wringing his hands agitatedly.

“So can you keep it a secret, Y/N? For a while?” Bucky asks, looking at you anxiously. You get the impression that he’s completely alright with the notion of a gay Captain America, and that he’s going along with this more for Steve’s sake, than anything else. Still, Bucky Barnes’ puppy-dog begging eyes will never fail to be your weakness, and so with a lighthearted laugh, you agree.

“Of course! Consider my lips sealed!” you assure them, miming the action of zipping your lips, locking them shut and throwing away the key. Bucky grins at your antics, though Steve still looks uneasy.

“It’s okay Stevie,” you soothe, reaching out to rest your hand on his forearm. “I respect your decision. It’s not my place to tell, nor is it my secret to tell. As long as you’re happy, I’m good,”.

Steve breathes a sigh of relief, shoulders sagging as the tension flows out of his body, your words seeming to have placated him significantly. He gives you a tentative smile, “Yeah? Thanks, Y/N,”.

“So…we all good? We’re settled, aren’t we?” Bucky asks, getting off the bed and sauntering over to Steve. He slings his metal arm over Steve’s shoulders. “‘Cause if we are, Steve and I could go back to—,”.

“No! Don’t wanna hear it!” you cry, throwing your hands over your ears, just as a chuckling Steve playfully shoves Bucky away. Nonplussed, Bucky grabs Steve’s arm and practically hauls him out of your room, shouting a cheery “Goodbye!” over his shoulder as he shuts the door behind him.

——————

After the day’s unexpected events, you figure that you’ve earned yourself a nice, hot, soak. You drag yourself into the bathroom, pulling your clothes off en route before dumping them in the laundry hamper by the door. Though your bathroom is sleek and modern, the tub is a vintage clawfoot one that you’d found in an antique shop a while back. You step into it and fiddle with the taps for a bit, twisting and turning them until the water is at the perfect temperature. Now that you are naked, you are more acutely aware of the throbbing ache between your legs. Seeing the water thundering into the tub gives you an idea.

With some (a lot) of manoeuvring, you manage to hook your legs over the lip of the clawfoot tub. You grip the edge of the tub and lift your body, angling your torso until the stream of water is falling steadily over your aching clit. You moan wantonly, throwing your head back in ecstasy and squeezing your eyes shut as the intense pressure rushes over your sex.

In your mind, you’re back in Steve and Bucky’s room, naked and sat with your back against Steve’s chest, his cock trapped between your bodies. Bucky’s head is between your legs, those plump lips and clever tongue exerting just the right amount of friction and pressure on your pussy, making you squirm and writhe in Steve’s arms. For his part, Steve’s got his hands on your breasts, pinching and rolling your nipples between his strong fingers. And, since Bucky’s mouth is otherwise occupied, you imagine Steve’s lips brushing against the shell of your ear as his husky voice whispers filthy words to you.

That is the thought that has you coming undone. Their names tumble from your lips, your hips bucking involuntarily and back arching into an inhuman angle as the waves of pleasure roll through your body. Your thighs tremble with the effort of holding yourself against the spray of water, but you force yourself to stay still, in order to prolong your climax. It is only when you are shivering from overstimulation that you gingerly lower yourself down into the tub, sighing contentedly as the warm water envelops you.

“Ms Y/L/N?”

You groan, pulled out of your post-orgasmic haze far too early. “Yes, FRIDAY?”

“Boss is asking if you’re planning on returning to the lab,”.

You pinch the bridge of your nose and huff in frustration. Trust Tony to ruin the moment. “Tell him I’m taking the night off, FRIDAY,” you say, letting your eyes slip shut, “I think I’ve earned it,”.

---------------------------------- Permanent tags: @feelmyroarrrr @rda1989 @bidianaprinxe @lumelgy @hollycornish @youtubehelpsmesurvive @amour-quinn @moonbeambucky @aquabrie @sanjariti @srgntjbarnes @ssweet-empowerment @kudosia @in-winchester-we-trust @badassbaker @jurassicbarnes @lowkeysebby @ufffg @ek823 @buchonians @dorkydaddies @katielu-blog

Send me an ask/PM if you want to be added -- I am not accepting tag requests from replies/comments.

#amarvelousfvckingwritingchallenge #stucky x reader #stucky smut #steve x bucky x reader #stucky imagines #stucky fanfiction #steve x reader #bucky x reader #steve rogers x reader #bucky barnes x reader #steve rogers smut #bucky barnes smut #my writing #interrupted

1K notes · View notes

purrincess-chat · 7 years

Text

Fluff Month 24-31 NLS

A day late, but hopefully @miraculousfluffmonth won’t be too mad at me. Here are the rest of the prompts for the rare/non love square pairings. As I said before, I’ll be finishing up the love square over the next month, but I wanted to finish out the rare pairs in time to be shared on the official blog. Fluff month was super fun, and I enjoyed writing for so many different pairings and just spreading a bunch of happy, feel-good drabbles with the world. Thank you so much for hosting this event, and I will totally do it again in the future if it’s held again!

Day 24

FF | AO3

Chloe shoved her suite door open with a scowl and tossed her bag at the couch as she dialed Sabrina’s number. It was absolutely a nightmare! A travesty worse than a bad hair day! How could Mme. Mendeleiev do such a thing? Ugh, she hated that witch sometimes.

“Hello?”

“Sabrina, can you believe Marinette got partnered with Adrien for this stupid chemistry project? She knows that Adrien and I are close and that I hate Marinette, so how could she do such a thing?” She shouted.

“My, what a tragedy.”

“I know! I can’t get a leg up on that woman. She just doesn’t care. It’s appalling who they let educate the youth these days,” Chloe plopped on her bed with a sigh. “I need a hot stone massage.”

“It is hard being you.”

“Ugh, tell me about it. Being on top is so much work. I should take a vacation,” She said, examining her manicure. “Then I won’t have to put up with seeing Marinette all over my Adrien.”

“Who knows? Maybe he’ll realize that Marinette is far inferior to you and come crawling back.” Chloe smiled at the thought.

“That would be nice.” She laid back and let out a deep breath. “Thanks for letting me vent, Sabrina. I always feel so much better afterward.”

“No problem.”

Lila hung up and bit back a smirk. She’d let Chloe figure it out on her own.

Day 25

FF | AO3

“Okay, so what’s the game plan?” Kim asked.

“Rose and Mylene are the weakest links followed closely by Nathaniel. Take them out first then go for Sabrina. Without her, Chloe is defenseless. Ivan will likely try to avenge Mylene, but if we’re lucky someone else will have taken him out by then. That leaves Juleka, who will likely fall shortly after Rose, and then there’s the love birds who will be our biggest threat,” Alix said, tapping her chin.

“This is why I picked you,” Kim nodded proudly. “I can’t stand losing.”

“Nothing is better than winning, so keep your eyes sharp. Once paint starts flying, it’s gonna be a warzone.”

“You don’t have to tell me twice,” He said, readying his paintball gun.

“Are all teams ready?” Max called from the center of the arena. “On your marks…get set…Go!”

Alix and Kim sprang from their hideout as the sounds of shots filled the air. They took out their first targets with ease and pressed forward.

“Nath at 10 o’clock!” Alix called, and Kim took him out. “Nice! Careful around this corner, we could get-”

“Ha!” Marinette beamed triumphantly as her team color painted their vests.

“Nice one!” Adrien cheered, high-fiving her before they ducked back around the other side of the wall.

Kim and Alix stood in stunned silence for a moment before a guttural growl erupted from her throat.

“Stupid lovebirds!”

Day 26

FF | AO3

Lila slumped toward the front doors after another long day of not making friends and dealing with begrudging stares. Seems as if the students couldn’t get over her behavior the first day, and now she was the school outcast. She hated to admit it was her own fault for getting carried away, but it still didn’t make them any better for isolating her. Every day she looked forward to the end of the day when she could just go home and distance herself from the world.

She reached the front doors and glanced up at the grey sky with a groan. Of course she didn’t have an umbrella. She missed her home in Italy. Paris had only proven itself to be just as cold and unforgiving as its citizens, and Lila wished that everything could just go back to the way it was.

“Hey, you need someone to walk you home?” She startled a little and turned to see that kid with the headphones from the other class.

“I’m fine,” She said haughtily, turning away with a sour pout.

“Oh, c’mon. It’s raining cats and ladybugs, and we’re going the same way,” He insisted with a smile, and Lila peaked up at him skeptically.

“I think it’s cats and dogs,” She replied pointedly.

“Where’s your sense of humor?” He chuckled, stepping closer so that his umbrella shielded them both from the rain.

“Why are you being nice to me?” She asked bluntly, folding her arms over her chest.

“Because you look sad all the time.”

Lila’s chest tightened at that, and she bit her lip to keep it from quivering. “Everyone hates me.”

“I’m not everyone.” She looked up into his earnest eyes and felt her cheeks warm a little. “So, can I walk you home?”

Lila searched his expression but found it to be sincere. He was the first person to forgive her for her lying to everyone, and something in that gave her a small sliver of hope that maybe things would work out after all. And even if everyone else still bore a grudge, at least she’d have one friend.

“Thank you.”

Day 27

FF | AO3

Kim shifted nervously as he waited under the Eiffel Tower. Max was usually extremely punctual, so he’d shown up early to make sure he had enough time to mentally prepare himself. His best friend hadn’t questioned why he’d wanted to meet him in one of the most romantic locations in Paris, but Max never usually questioned Kim’s antics, only went along with them.

He recited the poem he’d memorized in his brain for the thousandth time, heart pounding wildly in his chest. Max was really smart, and he wanted to impress him which is why he’d been agonizing over a profound way to confess his feelings all week. Wiping his palms on his hoodie, he glanced around for any sign of his friend, breath catching when he spotted him crossing the street. It was time. No more secrets. He was going to tell Max how he felt, and hopefully, he’d feel the same.

“Greetings, Kim,” Max waved with a smile that made Kim’s throat close.

“H-He…” Kim squeaked, gulping down that lump and taking a deep breath. “L-Love is like the wild-rose briar…Friendship, uh, like the…holly tree.”

Max gave him a quizzical look, and Kim shoved his hands into his pockets to hide how they shook. Why was he so nervous? Max was his best friend, and he’d always been there for him. Why was confessing his undying love so hard?

“The holly is dark when the rose-briar blooms but which will bloom most constantly?” Max continued, and Kim’s gaze snapped back to his. His gaze was warm and trusting, and it gave Kim the needed confidence to continue.

“The wild rose-briar is sweet in spring, its summer blossoms scent the air.”

“Yet wait till winter comes again, and who will call the wild-briar fair?”

“Then scorn the silly rose-wreath now, and deck thee with the holly’s sheen.”

“That when December blights thy brow he still may leave thy garland green.”

Kim felt the pressure building in his chest as three tiny words hid on the tip of his tongue until he couldn’t take it anymore.

“I love you, Max!” He blurted, cupping a hand over his mouth in shock. His face felt hot, his palms soaked with sweat, and his heart pounded a mile a minute in his ears as he waited with bated breath for Max’s reply.

His friend seemed just as shocked as he did, but it didn’t take him long before his smile returned, and he stepped forward to place his hands on Kim’s hips.

“I love you too, Kim,” He said, and Kim felt a rush of relief.

Stooping to meet his lips, all of his worry and doubt washed away, replaced by warmth and joy as they held each other close. It all felt silly now. Of course Max loved him. They’d been together since they were children, and Kim would make sure they were together until they were old. Max was his best friend, the love of his life, and his soulmate.

Day 28

FF | AO3

Alya had been faced with many challenges since becoming a super hero, and the most notable, in her mind anyway, was keeping up with the Ladyblog. It was impossible for her to film the fight and participate in it, but ever since she and Queen B joined, her viewers were itching for more coverage. Being a hero was everything she had hoped for and more, and she wouldn’t give it up for the world, but on the other hand, she also loved the Ladyblog. She wondered if her teammates had things like this to juggle as well.

What she needed was a cameraman to do all the filming for her while she had to be Rena, but who could she con into doing that? There was Nino, but he was likely to get suspicious if she asked all of a sudden, and the last thing she wanted was her identity getting out. She could ask Rose or Juleka, but she didn’t really like the thought of putting them in danger. Kim was a possibility, but she wasn’t sure she trusted his judgment on what counts as “good” footage. Though as civilians raced for safety up the street, she was starting to run out of options. At this point, she’d take anyone, and glancing around, she spotted Lila exiting a café nearby.

“Lila!” She called, racing over to her. “I need you to do me a huge favor.”

“What?” Her eyes narrowed skeptically as she looked Alya up and down.

“I need you to get footage of the akuma battle for my blog,” She explained, placing her phone in Lila’s hands.

“Why can’t you do it?” Lila asked pointedly.

“Because…I have…cramps?” Her voice trailed up at the end, and Lila searched her expression for a moment. Alya was afraid she’d refuse, but to her surprise, a smile spread across her lips.

“Sure, Alya. I’ll film for you,” She said, and Alya breathed a sigh of relief.

“Thanks so much, I-”

“Ah-Ah!” Lila held up a finger. “I got this for you, but you owe me.”

“Of course! Anything you want,” Alya agreed, bouncing anxiously as a crash sounded around the corner.

“Great! Then I’ll pick you up on Saturday. I’ve always wanted a romantic date in Paris,” She replied with a smirk, but Alya was more concerned with getting away to transform to really process what she was requesting.

“Sure, sounds good, see you then!” She called, racing up the street, and it wasn’t until Rena Rouge landed on top of the roof that she fully realized what she’d agreed to.

Had Lila just asked her out?

Day 29

FF | AO3

Nino stood on the steps of the Trocadero with many other news reporters and innocent bystanders watching the events of the latest akuma attack pan out. Paris’s heroes were fighting diligently against a rather tough opponent, and Nino found himself holding his breath at times when a certain cat hero got a little too bold. He was so reckless, and it made Nino twitch nervously just thinking about it.

“Hey, don’t look so down, kid,” A police officer soothed, patting his shoulder. “Ladybug and Chat Noir have got this. They’ll be alright.”

“Yeah, I know,” Nino said, shifting his gaze to his shoes. “I guess I’m just a little worried about Chat Noir; he’s my boyfriend, and often times he can be a little too…brave.”

“So you’re the youngster Chat Noir is dating, huh?” A female officer chimed in. “You’re one lucky kid. I hope you know that.”

Nino turned his attention back to the battle where Chat Noir had just successfully shaken the villain, allowing Ladybug to use her Lucky Charm to retrieve the object where the akuma was hiding. The battle was over, and soon everything would go back to normal. Chat stood triumphantly by Ladybug as the reporters rushed in, and Nino felt his cheeks heat up a little as they locked eyes, and Chat winked affectionately.

“Don’t worry,” He mumbled to himself. “I do.”

Day 30

FF | AO3

Nino heard a tap on his window, and he sat up, rubbing his eyes in confusion. The clock on his nightstand read 1:04AM, and he wondered what could be knocking on his window at that hour. The what turned out to be a who as he slipped on his glasses and caught sight of a yellow and black figure floating outside. Shucking off his blankets, he stood up and paced over to the window to let her in, wondering why on earth Queen B was making house calls so late at night.

“Hey,” He greeted groggily with a yawn as she climbed in and seated herself on the windowsill. “Can I help you with something?”

“There’s something that’s been on my mind for a while, and I haven’t been able to sleep well lately,” She said softly, shifting her gaze to her lap. “I don’t like keeping secrets from you.”

“Uh, okay?” Nino tilted his head to the side a little in confusion. It was too late, too early, for this, but she seemed genuinely torn about whatever it was she was talking about.

“Nino, I love you, and I don’t want to hide anymore. I want you to know me inside and out. With the mask and without…” She stated, and he took a step back, holding up cautious hands.

“Whoa, whoa, I have a girlfriend,” He said, leaning away from her, but to his surprise she giggled.

“I know, you dolt,” She teased, slipping off the ledge and standing up straight. “And she’s got a secret to tell you because she cares for you so much.”

Blinding light flashed in his room, and Nino shrank away, covering his eyes with his arm. After a couple seconds, it faded, and soft hands cupped his face. Blinking his eyes open, he came face-to-face with Chloe standing in her silk pajamas with a sheepish blush.

“Surprise,” She said, biting her lip as Nino processed what just happened.

“You’re…Wow, okay, uh,” He stammered, rubbing the back of his neck and clearing his throat. “So, you’re her every time?”

At that Chloe laughed, and Nino relaxed a little at the sound. Her natural laugh had become something dear to him, seeing her so at ease and open. He pulled her into his arms and placed a soft kiss on her cheek.

“I didn’t like keeping secrets from you,” She whispered, resting her head against his shoulder. “I want you to know every part of me.”

“Thank you for trusting me,” He murmured against her hair. “Your secret is safe with me, mon abeille.”

She giggled and nuzzled closer. “I love you, Nino.”

“I love you too, Chlo. With or without the mask.”

Day 31

FF | AO3

After twenty years of marriage, Tom and Sabine had grown quite comfortable with each other and ways in which they expressed their affection. So when they stood pressed together in the living room, swaying slowly to soft music, they weren’t fazed at all when Marinette popped in and out of the kitchen. She knew better than to interrupt them when they got in their moods, so she gathered her snack quietly and retreated back to her room, careful not to disturb them.

Tom sang along softly in Sabine’s ear, occasionally pressing gentle kisses to her hair. Even after twenty years, he still cherished every moment they spent together, and no amount of time could ever diminish the love he felt for the woman in his arms. She was his light, and the reason he greeted every day with a smile. By her side, nothing mattered.

“All these years later, and we still slow dance in the living room,” Sabine remarked with a dreamy sigh. “Reminds me of our wedding.”

“It reminds me of how much I love you,” Tom said, leaning his head against hers. “I’ll never forget the day that I promised myself to you. The day that I said I’m yours, forever.”

“And each day of forever has been just as sweet.”

#mlfluffmonth #chlolila #kimlix #kimax #chlonino #ninla #lilya #ninoir #tom and sabine #compilation

30 notes · View notes

andrewuttaro · 5 years

Text

New Look Sabres: 2019-2020 Schedule

Reviewing next season’s Buffalo Sabres Schedule was the first blog of New Look Sabres last year. It was full of mediocre to hardly passing jokes and double entendres. I wasn’t necessarily new to blogging, but I knew I was committing to a very regular blog and had some jitters about it. I’m not saying my writing has grown enormously since then, but I’ve figured out some stuff. Looking back on how I looked at this past season’s schedule is both delightful and disappointing. It’s delightful thinking we all were in for the thrill of the ten-game winning streak and we didn’t even know it. I had a little angry tangent about the Pittsburgh Penguins in last year’s schedule analysis and not only did we get a fun win off of those guys during the win streak, we beat them in their house in a barnburner. What fun that was! On the other hand every time I speculated about the playoffs it sorta burns in retrospect. I looked at the last seven games of the season as the opportunity for a fun, grade-A F1 duel for a playoff spot against mostly teams that didn’t qualify for the playoffs the prior season. Little did I know that those last games would be hard to watch waiting for a Head Coach firing. Enough reminiscing! The grass is always greener on the other side! What does the future hold? How does the 2019-2020 NHL Schedule set the table for the Buffalo Sabres 50th season?

To begin with: the Global Series. Playing regular season games on another continent is a blessing and a curse. It’s a blessing because it’s fun to have your team get that kind of attention for however short a window on top of the general fun of watching your favorite players travel to a foreign country. It’s a curse because that’s a lot of extra travel and exhaustion for games that matter the same but are more difficult unnecessarily. I’m all for growing the game, particularly in a place like Stockholm, Sweden where, if this league ever does ever expand to Europe, will certainly be a target market. However it would be nice if those games either didn’t matter in the standings and or were in the preseason. The Buffalo Sabres will take on the Tampa Bay Lightning in two games November 8th and 9th. Rasmus Dahlin’s Instagram will be very fun I’m sure but for a team who has struggled to get good starts to their season a lot this decade, playing two games on another continent in November isn’t ideal. Two out of four games against a high-powered divisional rival will be absolute wild cards. That said, they’re going through it too and crazy as it may sound, Tampa wasn’t the hardest divisional opponent this past season. So that’s something. The Global Series isn’t the only different thing on the schedule. Since the day the Draft started actually we’ve known the first two games of the season. Buffalo starts on the road at Pittsburgh before returning for a home opener against the newly PK Subban-ized New Jersey Devils on October 3rd and 5th respectively. That’s a fun Saturday night not just because of Subban but the Devils also have this year’s first overall pick in Jack Hughes. Hopefully there are some equally fun Sabres players to talk about at that point, but this many months out the visitors are the more interesting part. Neither of those teams will be cakewalks to start the season but neither are impossible. This is the first season in a while neither of the first two games of the season involved a hated divisional rival. Speaking of divisional rivals: games against the seven other teams in the Atlantic Division are remarkably evenly spread out. Excluding eight division bouts in November each month has four or less excluding April of course. That high concentration gives me an interesting idea of focusing all the divisional trash talk into one month: Atlantic Division Hate Month! It’s a working title.

I mentioned briefly off the top this is the Sabres’ 50th anniversary season. Surely more promotional nights will be announced after I post this but already we’ve got a couple fun oddities listed. The home opener will feature a pregame ceremony featuring past Sabres Captains. If that shit doesn’t look like a fucking illuminati induction then it ain’t doing enough. Also potentially cult-like: “Founders Night” December 2nd against the Devils… why are the promotions with big cult potential both against the Devils… hmm, I’d bring a crucifix to both if I were you. How about we chase that with some normal stuff: there’s a California road trip in October, there’s a potentially weak stretch of teams down the last ten games of the season that we’ll waste the opportunity and be long out of the playoffs by. I don’t know how you feel about the San Jose Sharks but there’s a rare home and home series in late October against them. If you’re the kind that likes to have a Sabres game at the epicenter of a day getting trashed there are a couple real gems in the schedule. For drunks who I’m going to insist travel safely there is a home and home back-to-back with the Toronto Maple Leafs Black Friday and the Saturday following Thanksgiving. I’m imagining a big drunk family enjoying that, just enjoy safely. You don’t want to be hungover on a Saturday evening watching that second game. New Year’s eve features a game against Tampa and January features a road game in Nashville on a Saturday night that would be tempting for even the most sober among us. If you’re more the lawful type like myself and prefer your non-alcoholic juice beverages in the afternoon you’ll be disappointed to hear there are only 3 Saturday games at 1pm. One of those is a game in Stockholm and the other two are on otherwise uneventful nights in the dead of winter. Take that how you will. Before we get to the strategy of the schedule its worth noting that at the posting of this article we have been royally teased. The team twitter account posted the 50th Anniversary patch in the current navy with navy OG logo after a row of that same logo in royal blue, red and black with the goat-head, and navy with buffaslug. There’s no real explanation for those except “Journey through the decades.” Sabres twitter immediately responded with the wounded optimism our team may actually do something cool. It’s hard to say exactly what that means. My heart tells me decade-themed nights where they wear the jerseys from those decades, but my head tells me tribute videos and special guests with some pricey auctions. We’ll see what it actually means. Here’s to hoping I guess.

So does the schedule help or hurt the Sabres prime goal of Lord Stanley’s Cup? Yeah, I know the best teams win no matter how tough their schedule is but let’s all be honest here: these guys need as much help as they can get to break the playoff drought. I’d say this season’s schedule is the most favorable to help the club as it’s been in years. It starts with October in which your toughest opponent is… the Sharks? The Habs? Ok, so there is a challenging opponent by last season’s standards sprinkled in, but the thirteen games of the season’s first month look to be a great early barometer for where the team is at. It’s not crazy to imagine our boys in blue and gold getting nine, ten, maybe even eleven wins in October. That would be the best start to the season in many years. There’s a lot of time off in November because of the Global Series so even if it’s not a flaming start they have time to figure their new coach out early. We’ll see a lot of our division’s elite that month: Tampa, Boston and Toronto. Getting wins against them will go a long way to building confidence if Ralph Krueger is the motivator we’ve been led to believe he is. December will be decisive per usual with the Western Canadian road trip preceding the trip to the Stanley Cup Champion St. Louis Blues. With some luck the two matchups against Boston after Christmas will provide an opportunity to solidify genuine hope before the halfway mark at Game 41 the last day of the calendar year. Most of the Sabres’ toughest matchups and series of matchups come after the bye-week next season. That bye-week will be the third week in January. If the Sabres are still in close contention for a playoff spot by the time they take on the Leafs at home Sunday, February 16th then hopefully we won’t be singing the same sad tune come April. That’s my optimistic strategic view of it, the wheels are still apt to come off pending a lot of stuff happening between now and then. I want to insist I’m being optimistic not unrealistic. I’m trying to see opportunities and the challenges. It’s easy to be pessimistic, especially with so little of the promised “roster surgery” occurring right now but this blog is a fan blog, not another raincloud engine like much of Sabres Fandom right now. Come here for your optimistic takes, you know the drill.

So there it is: our look at another Sabres campaign, the 50th one in fact. Recent history tells us otherwise, but the time is right for this club to finally take off. The post on Free Agency will come out late next week or the week after; maybe by then we have some more of the birds we need to actually take off. Before we see any W’s or L’s on this schedule we’ll need to go through what will hopefully be another busy offseason. If not, we will have a very interesting Offseason Retrospective at the end of August… one way or another. Hey, if this season sucks yet again we at least have the powerful drug of nostalgia and special promotions to distract us! Dear God, I hope its not another shite season but no matter what, come here for your fan reaction content on the Sabres. Like, comment and share this blog with your friends and family. Think of it this way: New Look Sabres is what you feel being a Sabres fan, not necessarily the smartest thing you think. For those of you who are new to this, I do try to sprinkle in some intelligent takes, but this blog is really about the beating of Sabres fan’s hearts. I hope we can beat together this season! Let’s go Buffalo!

Thanks for reading.

P.S. Development Camp is going on now at Harbor Center and I could emphasize all the draft picks new and old who are there but instead I’m going to show my Niagara University Purple Eagles pride and point out Niagara winger Eric Cooley! This will also be the extent of my coverage of Development Camp unless something monumental happens.

#buffalo sabres #hockey #blog #nhl #schedule

1 note · View note

sunbrights · 7 years

Note

B, C, E ( bite aggression ), F, H, K, L, M, O, Q, R, S, T, U

B: Any of your stories inspired by personal experience?

Most of them have bits and pieces that are inspired by aspects of my life, definitely! Just a couple fast examples: Fuyuhiko’s dog Taro in “fear aggression” is loosely based off of my childhood dog, and the idea/experience of the tide pools in “shelf sea” was mostly drawn from my experiences at the beach I grew up near.

C: What character do you identify with most?

Ahhh, in terms of characters that I write about on this blog, prrrrobably Fuyuhiko, haha. Characters with that “I need to make my own way” mentality tend to really resonate with me.

E: If you wrote a sequel to [insert fic], what would it be about?

This is a really interesting idea! I never really considered the possibility of a sequel for this fic. But if I did extend the idea, I think I’d write the second part from Peko’s perspective– let her gain confidence interacting with animals on her own, maybe start with her forming her own bond with Taro separate from Fuyuhiko. At it’s core I think I’d want it to be about Peko’s sense of self, her getting more comfortable embracing that, and how her relationship with Fuyuhiko would grow from there as a result.

F: Care to share a favorite hurt/comfort fic?

Hurt/comfort is really just a single aspect of it, but The Flower blooming in adversity by @thewildwilds is just a beautiful fic that’s magnificently done. It’s one of my faves, I love it love it love it a lot.

H: How would you describe your style?

Hmm, in general I gravitate towards a very close 3rd person limited, for characters, and (an attempt at) a more minimalistic prose style, if that makes sense. I tend to look for wordiness when I’m looking for weak points in my writing; my gdoc notes have a lot of “do you even need this” and “is there a better way to say this” and “just axe this whole thing jfc” in them, haha. Whether or not I’m successful is a whole other thing, though!!

K:What’s the angstiest idea you’ve ever come up with?

Oh, “by the claw of dragon,” probably. :) Or, alternatively, the sequel to it that so far only lives in my head.

L: What’s the weirdest AU you’ve ever come up with?

Answered here! (this answer is still boring i’m so sorry)

M: Got any premises on the back burner that you’d care to share?

Sure, why not!! These have been in my head for so long they’re practically chipping their way out, so:

“brick by brick,” the postgame kuzupeko fic I’ve mentioned a few times, is essentially about navigating physicality in their relationship in the aftermath of Everything. It’s a messy, delicate thing that’ll take a lot of time to get right, but worthwhile, I hope.

The Fuyuhiko character study I’ve mentioned is about the time he spends alone in his cottage during the Chapter 2 investigation phase.

The “viewfinder” companion/follow-up is a Fuyuhiko + Sonia friendship fic in the same vein.

The HZD AU is a glorious dumpster fire.

O: How do you begin a story–with the plot, or the characters?

Answered here!

Q: Do you have any discarded scenes/storylines/projects?

I do, actually! This is from a discarded project that probably won’t ever see the light of day. I also have a document in my BTCOD folder specifically just for things I feel like I need to cut but I still like the wording of/idea behind, in case I ever want to use them later. There’s an entire scene in there that I cut and actually planned to post once the whole fic was finished, if you guys are interested in that (assuming I don’t recycle it for something else, but this late in the game I don’t think I will). I don’t want to post too much while the story’s still unfinished, just so that cut portions don’t influence how people read the rest of it, but I think this is a safe lil snippet to post:

It started when they were seven, after her brother had dragged his feet getting dressed one morning and ended up making them all late for their lessons. Natsumi told him the story of the Teke Teke that night as payback, when it was dark out and past both their curfews. She’d sat on the floor of his room and dragged her nails across every individual straw in the tatami, her shoulders hunched and her elbows splayed, until he pulled his blanket up over his head and screamed at her to get out.

She’d been trying to scare him, but hadn’t planned for the trip back to her room in the dark. Every slanting shadow was a monster waiting for her to turn the corner, and every creak in the floor was someone standing right behind her ready to grab her by the hair. She ran the rest of the way once she was far enough that Fuyuhiko wouldn’t hear.

Peko had stayed up with her that night. “If we sit like this,” she’d said, bumping her shoulders against Natsumi’s back, “Nothing will be able to sneak up on us.”

R: Are there any writers (fanfic or otherwise) you consider an influence?

HONESTLY there isn’t one specific person (or even a handful of people) I think I could point to as having an influence on my writing. I definitely think reading a ton helped me find my voice as a writer, don’t get me wrong, but I think what helped the most was getting a wide range of different styles and perspectives through the years, until I settled on something that really felt like “me,” if that makes sense. boring answer 2.0!!!

S: Any fandom tropes you can’t resist?

Answered here!

T: Any fandom tropes you can’t stand?

Answered here!

U: A pairing you might like to write for, but haven’t tried yet.

Hmm!! I’ve wanted to try my hand at Sondam for a while (and it might show up as a background pairing eventually), and I like the IDEA of writing pairings for some characters, but haven’t yet had a pairing or a concept really jump out at me. If ever one does, y’all will know about it straightaway, believe you me.

#you pulled no punches anon!!!#thanks for asking!#these were fun to answer #it's also way past my bedtime so sorry if some of these answers make no sense #anon #asks and answers #memes #not a fic

2 notes · View notes