#it's just a matter of cutting out things i don't want real quick and then speeding them up

[alyswritings]

Creep

Sturniolo Triplets x sister!reader

Summary: Y/N runs into a creep at the store.

Warnings: creepy dude

(gif not mine)

Y/N is visiting her brothers in L.A. and the four are currently shopping after having gone to see a movie. Y/N separated from her brothers to find some clothes, the triplets going to the men's section, promising to text each other when they were done.

Y/N has a few clothes in her arms, already trying them on. She continues to look through the racks, seeing if anything else grabs her attention.

"Hey, sweetheart." She turns at the voice, finding a man, definitely in his mid 30s, if not 40s, standing there, a predatory smile on her face. The 18 year old tenses up a bit, but tries not to make it obvious.

"Hi." She mumbles, not wanting to be rude in case that were to go the wrong way -- even though whatever she does, it's 99% a lose/lose situation for her no matter how she reacts.

"What you doing here all alone?" He asks, walking closer, eyeing her up and down.

"I-I'm not alone, actually." Y/N nervously clears her throat. "I-I have brothers -- three of 'em." She quickly informs, praying that those three brothers could show their faces at the moment.

"I don't see 'em anywhere." The guy chuckles. "You're a pretty little thing, aren't ya?" He grins. Y/N merely hums, turning her attention back to the clothes for sale. Maybe if she ignores him, he'll leave.

"What, not gonna talk to me now?" He leans down, getting too close for comfort. "C'mon, honey, I'm not a bad guy. You wanna go get something to eat?"

"N-no." Y/N mumbles, shaking her head, taking a few steps away to create distance, but he only follows.

"You sure? I know a really good place." He persuades.

"I'm 15." She lies.

"So?" He shrugs causing Y/N's stomach to churn, her throat closing up. "C'mon, pretty girl." He puts his hand on her waist, sliding it around her back to her other side, pulling her closer.

"I don't-- no. I really don't want to." She meekly replies, her breathing picking up at how he has her trapped.

"You'll love it. I promise." He smiles, leaning down so he's in her face.

"Could you, please--" Her voice cracks. "I really don't--"

"Hey!" Y/N's protest is cut off by a very familiar voice that makes her sigh in relief. "The fuck you doing?" Nick questions.

"Just having a conversation, man." The guy shrugs, loosening his grip enough to let Matt pull Y/N away, wrapping his arm around her shoulders. He turns away from the guy, tucking Y/N into his side.

"You okay?" He mumbles, loud enough for only her to hear. Y/N's breathing is shaky, her hands shaking. "Breathe. Breathe." He quietly instructs, demonstrating the breathing exercise she always follows when she needs it.

"Uh... didn't look like a pleasant conversation." Chris comments, glancing at Y/N who Matt shields from the man.

"We were having fun. Who the fuck are you guys, anyway?" The guy rolls his eyes at the three boys who look the same.

"People who aren't putting up with your shit." Nick replies. "Next time you try to touch someone, make sure it's consensual, creep."

"Fuckin' perv." Chris grumbles under his breath, sending the man a disgusted look.

"Hey, girl, can I get your number?" The guy asks.

"No." The triplets immediately answer, glaring at him until he's out of sight.

"Y/N/N. You okay?" Chris asks, lightly patting her on the head. The girl weakly nods, starting to calm down now that the man's gone.

"Thank you." She mumbles.

"No need." Nick says, ruffling her hair. "Should've gotten here sooner." Y/N shakes her head, silently insisting it's not their fault. They couldn't have known.

"Here. You guys go out to the car, we'll pay real quick." Chris offers, taking the items from Y/N's arms.

"Okay." Matt nods. "C'mon." He mumbles, leading Y/N out of the store. He keeps his arm around her all the way to the car, opening the door for her and shutting it after she gets in.

"Sure you don't wanna sit up front?" Matt asks, glancing back at her. Y/N nods. "You sure you're okay?" He asks, reaching back and rubbing her knee.

"Yeah." Y/N nods. "Not the first time I've had to deal with creepers."

"Yeah, I know." Matt grumbles in annoyance and disgust, hating how Y/N, and all women, have to deal with guys who refuse to respect a simple wish. "Fucking stupid asshole pervs." He huffs.

"Can we get Cane's?" Y/N asks.

"Yeah." Matt nods.

"Do you guys have ice cream?" She asks.

"We can stop and get some." Matt promises.

Chris and Nick get to the car, Chris climbing in the passenger seat while Nick puts the shopping bags in the trunk before getting in next to his sister.

"Where now?" Chris asks, glancing between his three siblings.

"We're gonna stop to get ice cream and then Cane's." Matt informs. "You guys need anything?"

"Nope." Nick shakes his head, getting on his phone.

"I'm good with that plan." Chris nods. While Matt starts to drive, Chris takes the aux cord, putting his music on, but makes sure he doesn't play any songs Y/N dislikes too much.

Nick gets on his phone, immediately going to TikTok. He waits until he finds a funny video to show Y/N, the girl quietly laughing at it. He continues to scroll while Y/N scoots over to the middle seat and buckles up there. She slouches a bit, leaning against Nick, her head on his shoulder while they watch the videos.

---

The four get back to the triplets' house, going up to the kitchen and getting the food out, Matt putting the ice cream in the freezer.

Y/N digs into some of the fries, taking a sip of her drink.

"Come here." Chris walks over, his arms held out to her. He pulls her into a tight hug, his head resting on top of hers. Y/N accepts the hug, hugging him back with almost as much strength. She knows it's his best way of comforting and he probably wanted to hug her earlier, but didn't get the chance.

"You guys don't have to give any special treatment cause I was preyed on, you know?" Y/N comments as she pulls away. Chris keeps a hand on her shoulder, moving his fingers to play with her hair.

"Mm. You still seem kinda out of it." Chris points out, the girl still a bit quieter than usual.

"You did pretty much have a panic attack. Definitely on the verge." Matt reminds.

"Relax. We weren't treating you that special." Nick says. "But, if you insist." He chucks a few fries at her.

"Nick!" She complains.

"What?" He innocently shrugs.

[beebreadgames]

exporting my first ever vid to see how it turned out 😬 openshot is so laggy for me so i feel like i can't see the final product via the editor🤧 i'm definitely going to try and learn blender's video editor when i have time this week

[ddejavvu]

Hi!!!

Imagine hotch x reader where the reader is pregnant and hotch isn’t there when she goes into labor but Derek is (she left her wallet at the bau or something while visiting Hotch and Derek came over to drop it off to her… or something like that)

I’m imagining the interaction between Derek and Hotch once he finally gets to the hospital 😭😭

You've watched Derek walk into active shootings, and run an unsub off the road by crashing his car into theirs, but you've never seen him quite as scared as he is now that your water has broken.

"Oh shit," His eyes widen and he presses his back flat to the wall of the kitchenette, eyeing the stain on your work pants, "Uh, that's- we have to go now, don't we?"

"Now," You plead, panic seizing you as well, no matter how much you try repressing it. You know a stressful labor won't be good for your daughter, but there's no way it's going to go smoothly now that Aaron isn't here.

"Okay. Okay, I gotcha," Derek promises, with more confidence than you're sure he truly possesses. He reaches out to help you from your chair, supporting most of your weight with a hand around your shoulders and the other cupped under your belly. Walking is more of an awkward shuffle than his typical long strides, but he helps you over to Hotch's office where your husband's hospital bag is kept. Derek slings the diaper bag over his shoulder and tries getting you back on your feet after you've reclined against the armrest of Aaron's couch, but you struggle to move properly.

"Okay, uh- okay. I'm gonna carry you, alright?" Derek looks into your eyes for permission, but you'd be doomed if you denied, "Okay, c'mere, just- yeah, wrap your arms around my neck, Y/N. That's it," You do as you're told, and Derek scoops you up bridal style. You're constantly impressed by his muscles, but now more than ever.

"Okay, mama. Let's get you to the car, then we'll go to the hospital. We'll turn the sirens on," Derek promises, moving as fast as he can with you in his arms and the bag balanced on his shoulders, "Cut through traffic."

"Thank you, Derek," You groan, face pressed into his shoulder as your first wave of contractions begins flowing over you. It's an aching you've never felt before, and you try not to sob knowing that they'll only get worse with time.

"No need, no need." He assures you, and he's surprisingly fast to get you into the car. True to his word, he turns the sirens on, but your groans and moans of pain might be louder than the piercing wails that clear the road for you.

"Okay," Your eyes are squeezed shut, but you hear the squeal of tires against the road as Derek pulls into the parking lot, "Okay, we're gonna get you in there, okay? Then I'll call Hotch, you just do your thing."

An attendant is already rushing out to meet you and you squeeze Derek's arm one final time, a pained smile on your face as he watches the nurses help you into a wheelchair.

"Thank you," You repeat, "Derek, thank you. I love you."

"Love you too," He grins, relaxed now that he knows you're finally in proper hands, "Now go have us another BAU baby!"

--

Aaron storms into the waiting room a mere twenty minutes after Derek calls him, and he was supposed to be conducting a prison interview, so Derek doesn't want to think about how he'd managed to get here that fast.

"My wife," Hotch demands, as if Derek thinks he might be here to read to sick children, "Where's Y/N?"

"Delivery room 4," Derek stands to show him the window attached to your room, blinds drawn and painful groans coming from within, "Hurry, man, they said it's going real fast."

"Thank you." Aaron stops to grab Derek's forearms, squeezing them and nodding once, "Thank you, Morgan."

"Get in there," Derek grins, the last bit of stress that had been squeezing at his chest alleviated now that Aaron is here to witness the birth of his daughter, "Go on, Hotch."

Aaron doesn't need more coaxing than that.

He's allowed a quick entry when he introduces himself to the nurse, and you're already being fed ice chips that last mere seconds between your clenched teeth.

"Honey," Aaron rushes forward, and you reach out for his desperately. Your grip is nearly bruising on his hand but he couldn't care less, and leans in to kiss your sweat-lined forehead.

"What can I do?" He asks, standing even after the nurse offers him a chair. You nod to it, and that's his cue to sit.

"Nothing." You nearly sob, overtaken by pain Aaron wishes he could fix for you, "Just- just promise me- aah!"

"You're okay," Aaron jumps into action, squeezing your hand so that you squeeze his even harder, pressing his free hand against your teeth through your cheeks so that you don't crack a tooth by clenching your jaw so tight. You let him force your mouth open but it only makes your cries of pain louder, and when they subside you open your eyes to find him staring worriedly down at you.

"I want the baby to have Morgan as a middle name," You finish your thought, "I- I know we decided on Mia for her first, but- but-"

"Mia Morgan Hotchner," Aaron nods, smiling at the way the name rolls off of his tongue, "I think that's perfect, honey."

[masterhallmark]

Credit for discovery: @misscloudiedays

So a lot of people are confused as to how Epic Mickey Rebrushed meaning Disney probably isn't getting profits works, so let me explain real quick:

What's the Sitch?

If you go to the Steam Page, Disney is not publishing EM Rebrushed themselves like they did with the original EM games, another company ,THQ Nordic, whom Disney does not own is.

This likely means they sold the licensing rights to that company rather than accepting profit cuts.

How this works

Copyright holders often do this if they think the product would make less profits than what they sold the licensing rights for. For example, this happened with the author of the Witcher books, who thought the games would flop and sold the licensing rights instead of accepting a percentage of the profits. He later acted like the victim when the games actually ended up being wildly successful. This also happened to the writer of the American Pokemon Theme Song, who didn't know the Pokemon franchise was going to go on for decades and remain popular, though he was more chill about it and worked something out.

Basically, Disney likely had so little faith in the game, they chose to sell instead of accept profits, which would mean whether you buy or pirate the game wouldn't affect them, since they would have already gotten the agreed upon amount, and they'd probably piss themselves if the profits Purple Lamp gets is more than what they sold it for.

Would they actually do that?

For anyone who questions if Disney would really be dumb enough to do this, REMEMBER THIS IS THE COMPANY WHO:

SHUT DOWN AND ENTIRE VIDEO GAME DEVELOPMENT COMPANY JUST BECAUSE EPIC MICKEY 2 DIDN'T MAKE AS MUCH MONEY AS EPIC MICKEY 1

THOUGHT PEOPLE WOULD ABANDON CONSOLE GAMING IN FAVOR OF MOBILE GAMING

THOUGHT KINGDOM HEARTS COULDN'T POSSIBLY HAVE SEQUELS

HAD A CEO WHO THOUGHT ADULTS DON'T ENJOY CARTOONS

AND THE MOST RECENT BLUNDER OF ALL, THOUGHT DISNEY FANS WOULD PREFER A LUMA KNOCKOFF OVER STARBOY IN WISH, BECAUSE THEY WANTED A MARKETABLE PLUSHIE

Yeah, I think they're that dumb.

Bottom Line

For those participating in the Disney boycott, it is probably safe to get the game, and will not be a breach of your boycott. Buying the game would instead show support to those who actually care about the game while not benefitting the company that abandoned it.

That being said, this is not guaranteed to be completely correct. Keep an eye on things as it develops, and make your own decisions on the matter.

[binniesbobastay]

Ateez: How They Take Your Panties Off

hi all! sorry i haven't written anything in a while, just busy with school. but i figured i would give you guys this real quick cause i have some time :) Hope you enjoy!

18+ content under the cut. Minors do not interact. Ateez x fem!reader

Hongjoong

It depends on his mood. If it's a night where he's taking his time with you, he'll slowly slide them down your legs, making sure his fingertips softly graze your skin. All while keeping those dark eyes set on yours. He doesn't want to tease you necessarily, he just gets drunk off the way you gasp and shudder under his slow touch <3. But when he's being rough, he's ripping them apart. He'll grasp the waist band in both his hands and tear them right down the middle, leaving you to marvel at his sudden outburst of strength.

"Don't worry, darling. I'll buy you some new ones." He reassures you, placing a kiss on your knee and watching you writhe under him as he suddenly rubs his thumb against your clit. "Let me claim what's mine..."

Seonghwa

Slow and sensual without fail. He's all about dragging things out and adding extra stimulation to make sure you know that you are so loved by him. Therefore, before his fingers disappear under your waist band, he's kissing your stomach just above it until you whine for him. He chuckles against your skin, finally giving you what you want as he begins to take the garment off. He trails behind it, leaving hot kisses down your legs that make your head spin. He also kisses his way back up once the garment is done, ready to devour you.

"My precious little thing..." He mutters between kisses down your thigh, not letting up until your panties are ready to be thrown off by your ankles. "I can't wait to ruin you."

Yunho

He's such a daddy, making you give him a show as he watches you from the edge of the bed. Whether it's modeling a new set of lingerie or flashing him your doe eyes while you get down on your knees, he's making you prove to him that you want him. He like watching you undress yourself before sex, this goes for panties to. He'll direct you with his words... When to slide your thumbs past your waist hand, how fast he wants them down your legs... he's directing every single detail. Once they're off, he'll hold out his hand and you obediently place the garment in his palm.

"Good girl, thank you." He says, stashing them away in his back pocket. He then takes you by the hand and lays you over his lap.

"You deserve a reward..." He'll growl out before fucking you with his fingers until you're crying for his cock.

Yeosang

He's so desperate, eyes blown with lust, ready to just rip your panties off and take you. But he also doesn't want to hurt you, so his hands are shaking as they come down your body, needing reassurance. Please kiss his head and tell him it's okay <3. He needs to hear the words come from your mouth and when they do, he promises to make it all worth your while, hurriedly sliding them down. His rough hands will caress your thighs as he makes his way in between them.

"Please baby, please..." He whines, teeth grazing along your collarbones as his hands come to grip the fabric. "Let me make you feel good, I promise I'll do so good for you..."

San

One word... teeth. San always takes your panties off by taking them in between his teeth and sliding them down your body. It just makes him feel so hot and he knows the type of reaction it gets out of you. It doesn't matter where you are, if it's a quickie, he doesn't care. He's animalistic when it comes to his desire for you, matching the energy with searing love bites along your skin. His favorite thing to do is push your thighs up to your chest once he's got your panties past them and slide them the rest of the way off that way. San wants to make everything sexy every time he fucks you with no exceptions.

"Mmm..." The muffled groan that San lets out as he takes the fabric into his mouth never fails to make you shudder. Once they're off, he sits up to look at you, panties still clad between his teeth. He lets go of them and smirks, tossing them over his shoulder. "You ready for this, love?"

Mingi

So impatient. He prefers pushing your panties to the side rather than taking them off completely. He doesn't have time for that, he needs to have his big cock inside you now. Plus he just thinks you look so pretty in them and he loves the feeling the material adds onto his length as he slides in and out of you <3. Also there's nothing that makes his brain short-circuit more than when you ride him in reverse cowgirl with your g-string clinging to one your cheeks. He'll pull you down by it as you bounce on him while giving you a spank every now and then.

"Fuck, baby..." He moans, rubbing at the wet patch on the fabric. It's not until your panting under him that he hooks his finger under the fabric, pulling it aside with a smirk. "So fucking wet."

Wooyoung

I think he's sweet with it <3. He likes to take your panties off while he's kissing you. Lips locked on yours as he undresses you, he finds it very intimate. He'll also keep his lips on yours as he slides in, loving the way you two just swallow each others moans. I also don't think he would want to take them off all the way. He finds it hot leaving them wrapped around your ankles making you engulf his waist between your legs even more.

"Oh yes, honey..." He whispers against your lips as he slides the last garment on your body down, exposing all of you to him. He peppers kisses down the side of your neck and whimpers about how much he loves you as he pushes his cock into you.

Jongho

This man leaves you weak every time. He likes it when he's sitting down on the couch or bed with you standing over him. His hands run along every inch of your body, praising you endlessly as he undresses you. Once he's finally got you down to your panties, he makes sure his eyes stay locked with yours. He gives you a little smile before taking them off just like that and then guiding you to sit on his lap. But sometimes, when he's rough, he'll take the opportunity to lift your hips off the bed. The little yelp of surprise you let out goes straight to his length. He yanks them off, just ready to absolutely pound you.

"You're such a pretty girl, you know that?" Heat creeps across your face as he flashes his sweet smile at you. He pulls your legs to get you to straddle him and you moan when you feel his tip prodding at your entrance. "Good girl, I know you can take me."

[irisintheafterglow]

it's no secret that olympic athlete!sakusa despises parties. you don't make it easier on him, especially during the jackals' annual holiday party.

cw: a little suggestive toward the end but nothing explicit (he does things to me can you blame me)

he was in hell. the table was too loud, the people were too loud, and he couldn't find you. to make matters worse, his teammates seemed to be hellbent on catching you and him under the mistletoe.

"i swear, i'm going to shove a candy cane so far up your-"

"hey, no vulgarity! it's christmas," atsumu cuts in with a mischievous sparkle in his eye. the effects of the spiked eggnog in his cup were obvious, much to sakusa's disgust. "plus, objects shoved up our lovely posteriors would impede our mission for the night." snickers run through the remainder of the group, drowned out immediately by the chatter of the party. even though it was tradition and the most talked about event for months, it still didn't make the atmosphere any less hell-like.

"and then i'm going to hide your bodies so well, the police won't even know where to look," sakusa continues, sending them a glare over the rim of his soju bottle. his friends watch his eyes flick over the faces in the crowd, searching the shut-down hotel restaurant for whom they could only assume was you.

"yeah, yeah, then you'll be at our funerals with the fake tears running rampant and telling our mothers how great we were. we've heard this spiel before," bokuto dismisses with a wave of his hand and a knowing smirk on his face. "just you wait. you'll be thanking us later, lover boy."

"i hate you all," he replies, registering the journalist's approach seconds before she arrives at their table. "media," he warns quietly. "don't do anything dumb."

"evening, boys," she greets a split second later, shrewd eyes raking over the group. sakusa tries to keep his grimace off his face. the task proves difficult, though, when he can practically hear atsumu set his sights on charming her by the end of the night. "mind if i snap a picture of you all looking so handsome?" atsumu clumsily sputters out an answer, resting an arm around hinata's shoulders and forcefully pulling sakusa closer as bokuto smiles wide enough to cover the entire frame. a click and a familiar blinding flash later, the image is taken and he tenses in anticipation of the inevitable follow-up conversation. "so, how are you boys feeling tonight? enjoying the party?"

"we are," hinata answers before anyone can stop him from accepting the invitation for questions. "we were just talking about our plans for the rest of the evening."

"yep, involving sakusa and the mistletoe. he doesn't want us to say that, though," bokuto whispers at the same volume he normally speaks.

"oh? do tell more." her eyes shine like a piranha's and it makes sakusa's stomach turn. "who's the lucky lady? i'd love to get her side of all this, too." a clever batting of her eyelashes toward atsumu has him nearly crawling over the table to answer her.

"you're gonna love this, ma'am. the one sakusa's been after is-"

"this isn't a press event, so i'd advise you enjoy the rest of the festivities. thank you for your time," sakusa informs her flatly, much to the dismay of his teammates. he was never one for interviews, much less team ones, and catching him off-guard at a party was a surefire way of pissing him off. it was a golden opportunity for her, yes, but one more question out of her lipsticked mouth would force him to take a walk. "enjoy the party."

"wait, but-"

"omi? d'you mind walking me to the car real quick? i forgot my chapstick and the cold is making my lips dry." a gentle hand on sakusa's shoulder instantly eases any tension in his body and he hopes you can feel the gratitude radiating from him. it takes him a moment to collect himself enough to stand, curtly excuse himself from the table, and walk with you toward the door. his fingers intertwine with yours as your shoes click across the marble tiles of the hotel lobby, pulling you closer when you step into the winter night. "did you like my little rescue? i've been working on my acting skills," you ask with a small smile once you're finally away from prying eyes and nosy ears.

"i'll make space on the bookshelf for your academy award. and yes, more than you'll ever understand," he exhales, slowing your pace while he waves down the valet to retrieve his car. "i only wish you got there sooner."

"and caused more drama? i would think a volleyball player understands that timing is everything," you tease, brushing a stray curl from his face and running your thumb across his cheekbone. "i can't blame her, though. you do look ridiculously good tonight." his ears become the slightest shade pinker and you can't hide your giggle at his embarrassment. he never was the best with words, nor did he outwardly show a lot of emotion. but, after knowing him for so long, you found that the right words could have him in a puddle before you in less than a few sentences.

"speak for yourself," he counters in a tone low enough to give you goosebumps, ones that weren't from the chilly air. "it's been a struggle to keep my hands to myself for a few hours." his hand snakes across your lower back and grabs you by your waist, closing any remaining space between your bodies. he tracks the way your fingers dig around your bag, how you're conveniently avoiding his eyes just to drive him even more mad. "what're you doing, dove?"

"grabbing my chapstick," you reply nonchalantly, popping off the cap and swiping it across your bottom lip a few times. his eyes burn on your skin and you sneak a glance at his face to find his pupils blown to the size of ornaments. you were really testing his resolve tonight. "what, you really think i'd go anywhere without this?"

"no," he admits, eyeing his car as it pulled into the roundabout. "i knew that was bullshit from the moment you walked up to the table. the guys probably knew it, too."

"you think that lady knew it?"

"no way, unless hinata's lips got loose." on instinct, you step into the passenger's side after he opens the door.

"can you imagine the headline? 'stats analyst steals away star hitter during the middle of a holiday interview. dive into the rumors of sakusa's secret relationship!' i'd never hear the end of it," you chuckle once he slides into the driver's seat. with the heater blasted and the seat warmer turned all the way up, you suddenly remember why you're in the car in the first place. "wait, shouldn't we go back inside?"

"why should we?" a dangerous glint appears in your boyfriend's eyes and you're thankful for the darkness that hid your warming face. "i've got all i need right here." with one more glance to make sure all the windows were rolled up, he finally leans over and presses his lips to yours. with a sigh, you let his hand wander over your leg, lightly stopping its trajectory with a hum when it creeps closer to your inner thigh. "too much? we can go back in if you don't wanna bail yet."

"no, i'm okay. i know you're ready to go, too," you murmur. even before you were officially in a relationship, there existed a silent understanding that, when one of you got tired of socializing, the other would be their excuse to leave. "tell the boys we got food poisoning from shrimp cocktail."

"neither of us ate the shrimp cocktail."

"who's gonna know? don't you wanna go home?" the jerk of the key in the ignition is the answer you receive, followed by the engine roaring to life. "i'll consider that a yes. it's a shame i have to hang up this outfit early, though. i do like it a lot." you unsuccessfully attempt to fake a frown, pulling at the expensive fabric of your party clothes. it was half the truth, but the other half of the truth stayed unspoken while his hand laid itself back on your thigh as he left the hotel in the dust.

"don't worry," he mutters without taking his eyes of the road. "i'll help you take it off."

if you enjoy my writing and would like to support me, you can buy me a coffee on my ko-fi! you can also check out my full masterlist here :)

[ghouljams]

I’m in a mood for cowboy! Ghost. How would Goose react if Ghost is super sick but is trying to still do his work? Would she go Mama Bear on him and force him to stay in bed while she took care of him? How would he react to someone being this attentive and caring to him while he is sick?

The problem is that Ghost is so used to toughing it out or taking care of himself that he will not tell Goose if he's sick. I think she'd know pretty quick though when he won't touch her because he doesn't wanna get her sick. No doctor Goose necessary, Momma Duck is one with the medical degree.

Simon is in the barn when you finally find him, he's been avoiding you since he left the house this morning and you're not really sure why. He's leaned against the wall, head tipped back and eyes closed, you can see the movement of his chest with each breath he takes. That's probably not good. You run through your options and settle on not being mad until he explains what's wrong. You grab his dog tags, because you know he won't risk breaking them. He sighs hard.

"Not in the mood sweetheart," He tells you, his voice is thicker than usual, too rough and deep for this late in the day.

"What's wrong with you?" You cut straight to the point. Simon doesn't even flinch, just pushes off the wall to stare you down.

"Nothing is wrong with me," It's too defensive, you narrow your eyes at him. He's not wearing his mask, it must've been real fucking uncomfortable for him to take it off. His cheeks are flushed, but not in a sunburn kind of way. You tug his tags and he resists your pull. Doesn't matter you can reach from here.

You raise a hand and press it against his forehead. Simon flinches away. Stupid bastard.

"Does daddy know you're sick?" You ask, not feeling particularly kind for asking in the first place. He should've told you.

"Doesn't need to, it won't affect my work."

"Bullshit it's not," You don't bother letting go of his chain, leading Simon out of the barn and back across the grass to his little house, "It's 100 degrees out and you're runnin' a fever, you plannin' on faintin'? You get any redder and I'll enter you in a tomato contest, swear to God I'm gonna kill ya' for this."

"You get more Texan when you're mad," Simon helpfully supplies. You don't bother turning to glare at him, you think he can feel it. He holds the screen door for you while you angrily push the house door open, more cooperative than you thought he'd be. Probably fixing to run back to work as soon as you leave. As if you would.

You don't let go of Simon until you see him sit on the bed. Even then you stand and tap your foot until he sighs and lays down like it's the hardest thing in the world. You give him a short nod and go to the bathroom for a thermometer and some cold meds. He's sat up and yanking his boots off when you come back. At least that's something. You hold out the thermometer and he takes it, but doesn't move past that.

"Under your tongue genius," You tell him already tipping purple nyquil into the little plastic cap. He eyes the cold medicine suspiciously. You set the full cap and the open bottle on the bedside table, and pull your phone out. "Either I take your temperature or Momma does, and you don't want me callin' the doctor out here."

Simon sticks the thermometer under his tongue. You don't know what it is with military men being so scared of the doctor, but it's damn useful for getting your way. You both wait for the thing to beep, you're quick to snatch it before Simon can. You're pretty sure he'll lie to you about his fever. You suck in a breath staring at the temperature on the little screen. 101, not good, and probably not helped by the heat or working all day.

"Wasn't that bad this morning," Simon grumbles. You don't spare him your glare this time.

"You-" You actually don't have an end to that sentence that doesn't make it sound like you want to strangle him. You point at the nyquil cap instead. He takes it dutifully and downs it like a shot. "I'm callin' the doctor." You tell him, because you can't really punish him for being sick, but you don't have to reward him either.

"Do not call the doctor," He warns you.

"Fine," You relent, Simon relaxes a little, "I'll call daddy." The tension is immediately back.

"Goose," Oh he's serious calling you that, too bad you're serious too, already dialing up your dad, "I'm warning you, do not." You hold the phone to your ear with a hand on your hip and wait for your father to pick up.

You don't even wait for him to ask you why you're calling you start right into it. "Simon's sick and you've been workin' him all-" Simon makes a grab for your phone while you're talking, you give a quick shout and try to hold it out of his way. He may be bigger than you but that doesn't mean he's going to stop you. Simon grabs your arm and pulls it down, you have to put real strength into keeping your phone held aloft.

"I'm fine, you don't need to call," Simon grits out, going for the more effective tactic of simply grabbing you around the waist and bodily hauling you onto the bed.

"How are you still this strong when you've got a fucking fever," You yell, trying to claw away from him. Simon just drags you back and snatches your phone.

"All fine here, sir," He tells Price quickly, keeping you pinned down with a firm hand on your back and your legs between his. He hangs up before Price can say anything and tosses your phone onto the nightstand. "Can you be less of a bloody wife for ten fucking minutes," He growls at you.

"Can you be less of a fucking soldier?" You hook your legs behind his and push up to reverse your positions. You settle angrily on his lap, and flop back on top of him.

"Forgot you could do that," Is the only response you get, half mumbled as Simon drags a hand down his face.

"Could've had a lovely day of me playing housewife, but no, it's always gotta be the hard way with you," You grumble, you hope the nyquil knocks him out before you do. You feel yourself raise with Simon's intake of breath, and lower quickly as he sighs. His hands grab you and flip you onto your stomach, you make yourself comfortable on him. He feels warm even though his clothes, you frown and press your ear to his chest to listen to his heart beat.

"You like the hard way." You can feel the rumble of his voice against your cheek.

"Not for this," you mumble, "you should've told me you weren't feeling good."

"I know," Simon sighs again.

"You'd wanna know if I was sick," Simon hums in response, you think the cold meds might be kicking in. You reach up to pat his face, "Stay awake I'm not done nagging."

"The fuck did you drug me for then?" He settles a hand on your head, the other rubbing your back with slower and slower motions. You suppose that's fair. "I'll tell ya' next time, alright? Lemme sleep."

"Fine," You relent, even though you don't fully believe him. You sort of wish Simon was a big baby about being sick, but you're also sort of glad he isn't. You wait for him to fall asleep before you get up to see if there's any soup in his little kitchenette. You expect he'll be out for a few hours, which is plenty of time for you to worry over him. Plenty of time for you to call your dad and tell him Simon's taking a sick day tomorrow, and plenty of time for you to sit on the bed next to Simon and brush his hair out of his face. He's such a soldier sometimes.

As if you wouldn't want to take care of him in sickness and in health.

[webslingingslasher]

i would suck dick for comfort most definitely sorry not sorry

the fact i got all these back to back 😭😭😭

kinda diff but same idea?

smutty content under the cut!

it's funny cause it would blow his mind that, that's what you want.

when it first happens you had a real sucky day and the only thing you felt like you were good at was making peter cum so you're all pouty and miserable watching him mercilessly kill opponents on his computer screen.

rolling your cheek to rest on the back of your hand, your front stretched across his bed.

"can i suck you off?"

you can hear a shout, muffled from his headphones.

'ayeooo, what the fuck?!'

you feel your cheeks warm, peter untucks an ear.

"what'd you say?" he couldn't believe it himself. you've never been so blunt when asking for him. he must have misheard.

you blink innocently, "mute me?"

peter taps his keyboard, you hear another roar, 'ayeoooo!'

"can i suck you off?"

his eyes flick to his bedroom door, his aunt's right outside on the couch. you've never been this risky before, "right now?" you lick your lips, "please?"

peter thinks it over, it should be a no brainer but his nightmare is his aunt knocking on the door while he's in your mouth. it doesn't matter, he'd be an idiot to say no.

"i..." several clicks, his screen goes blank, his headphones tossed on his desk. "yeah, okay." sitting up you grin, making grabby hands when he finally stands. 

"no! where go?" dropping into a pout when he walks towards his door, his fingertips flick the lock, you exhale an 'oh'.

peter raises an eyebrow, "are you okay?"

"no. yes. i feel shitty and i really want to make you cum, is that okay?"

peter cannot think of one scenario it wouldn't be okay.

-------

the second time is like the first, you figured it was a one one time thing, that you were in a funk and needed something to make you feel like you were good, and making peter feel good made you really feel good.

but now, after the third time you still couldn't understand what he was trying to explain, words and numbers going over your head; it felt like your head was about to explode.

your boyfriend's doing the best he can and doesn't deserve your frustration. you can't clear your thoughts, everything swirling in one jumbled mess and his explanations going nowhere. he's moving his mouth but all you hear is static.

all you needed was something to clear your mind, then you could truly focus and be nicer to peter. you needed something that would make you feel good, you needed... peter.

"same idea, you take the mean and multiply it by the val-"

"can i suck you off?"

peter's jaw drops, his eyes flicker from the notebook in front of him to you. "i'm sorry?"

your hand pulls at his waistline, "can i suck you off? i need something to help me focus." he doesn't say anything so you unbutton his pants, shifting in your seat at the kitchen table, preparing to hit the ground when his hands stop you.

"woah, okay, hold on. first off, i'm not sure if sucking my... i'm not sure if doing that will help you focus. second, at the kitchen table?"

nibbling on your bottom lip you shy away, you didn't think he was judging in a mean way, just in a 'he wouldn't do this' way.

"um, yeah, you're right. sorry."

peter doesn't like that you're being shy, watching you pick up a pencil and panic as you try and figure out what you definitely weren't listening to; his mind flashes back to the last time you asked on a whim.

"you doin alright, lovie?"

it's like you jolt away, "oh! um, yeah! just thinking."

"you sure? cause if you need a quick bedroom break i wouldn't mind."

it's like he just offered to take you to the moon. your head flips to him, stars in your eyes.

"really? cause i'm like," you make a line over your head with your hand, "up to here with information overload and i'm being kinda mean and i don't wanna be. i just need to clear my head and i dunno, it made me feel better last time."

when peter first got into the relationship he thought he struck gold. he some how got the prettiest person in the entire school to not only hit on him but like him enough to claim him officially. but he never actually thought about sex logically, because there was no way you would ever want to do that with him, until you reached your boiling limit and with tears in your eyes asked him why he thought you were ugly. then it became very clear you wanted, and like today, sometimes needed him like that.

so when situations like this happen, when he can't even believe it's real cause not even in his wildest dreams would he imagine his life being anything like this, he has no idea how to react. because, what do you mean you need to suck his dick?

"peter?" he's gone silent, you think the offers off the table. "it's okay if you don't feel-"

"i just don't get how it makes you feel any better. i mean, i'd get it if you wanted me to go down on you or if you wanted a quicky but i don't see how getting me off helps you. but if it does, i won't complain."

you can see his point, it does seem kind of odd.

"i think cause whenever you do stuff to me i just kind of get in my head. like, 'do i smell good, do i taste good, did i forget to shave, am i pulling his hair too hard, am i being too loud, too quiet? all those things. but when i do it to you, all i can think about is you and making you happy."

"so... when you..." his hand rotates as he skips over the words, you fill in for him, "suck your dick," he nods, "right, it makes you feel better because suddenly the only thing on your mind is me."

you nod, "correct."

"that's wild." his back hits against the chair, "also, not cool you're all freaked out when we have sex. not liking that."

you grab his shoulders in exclaim, "no! not like that! just, fleeting thoughts, i guess. but ninety eight percent of the time all i can think about is you."

"not risking the two percent?"

"i'd rather not."

"alright," peter knocks on the table, "now we got that out the way, from now on, you can please me whenever you want." he never thought he'd say those words.

"so... now?"

you cheer when your boyfriend stands, he gives you a pointed finger, "just so you know, this isn't something you can use to get yourself out of studying. this is me letting you use my body to help you focus better."

"yeah, yeah, yeah, bedroom, pants off."

------------

after that? psh. he said anytime you wanted and you used that to your advantage. it went from clearing your mind to just doing it cause he said you could.

one night you're stretched across his couch while peter sits in the corner, both of you focused on a movie. suddenly, you remember you have something much more fun to pass the time. sometimes, you forget you can just... do it.

digging your toes into his thigh he pushes them away, "ow," rolling your eyes you poke again. "can i suck you off?" attention caught, "right now?"

"do you think i'm asking in advance?"

"but i'm all comfy and we're more than halfway through the movie, i'm committed now." he doesn't even have to do anything.

"okay, stay there. i'll just go between your legs, then you can still see the tv." you shuffle around until your knees hit the floor, then bringing yourself to peter by pulling on his leg.

"yeah, but, on the couch? i mean, if may-"

you rest your cheek on his knee, his flannel pajama pants ultra soft. "please don't talk about your aunt when i'm about to suck your dick."

"but if we make a mess she'll-"

you hush him, your fingers pulling at his waistband.

"then i'll make sure i don't make a mess."

----------

another night, you spent the night and woke him up after a bad dream. at first he's frazzled but when you express your panic he's wide awake and rubbing your back.

"um, i know you're tired but do you think i could..."

peter's gotten better at reading hints.

he yawns first, then smacks his lips before shuffling his boxers off.

"commit me if i ever say no."



[misty-dreemurr]

Warnnings: death, implied murdere, blood, nondescript childbirth, religious themes, the creator and the reader are two different characters, mother is used to describe the creator but there are gender neutral, they/them pronouns used.

THE imposter is dead, golden blood drips from blades of grass, soaking into the ground. Bright blue four-petal flowers with golden stems blooms from the pools of blood. Cradle to the bosom of the imposter's chest was a weeping child— an infant only a few weeks old.

That explained too much. Everything made sense now, Why the imposter— no the creator would cover their stomach when under attack. Why they kept to themselves and not engage, not fight.

The true creator was dead, and the real imposter sits on the throne.

The true creator was dead, but there child lives on.

This imposter AU where the creator was killed a few weeks after giving birth has been haunting me for days, below the cut is just more ideas.

Depending on where the creator was killed I have a few characters that would find the creator and raid the 'heir'

For Mondstadt, Diluc would raise the reader, keeping the truth of them a secret to all but Kaeya and Jean.

For Liyue, Zhongli would care the the reader. He of course takes care of the creator's body, burying them and leaving the grave unmarked. He believes that by raising the creator's child he is repenting.

Inazuma, Yae Miko would raise the reader, she would keep the child hidden as she secretly plans the downfall of the fake on the throne.

In Sumeru Alhaitham and Kaveh would take in the reader. Why? For no other reasons than I think it's funny.

For Fontain Neuvillette takes in the child. When he had found the body of the creator and their child it rained for months. ( since I don't know much about Fountain and the characters I didn't have much to add at the moment)

Snezhnaya the reader is found and raised by Columbina(and the other harbingers, but mostly Columbina) the reader is kept hidden from the outside. They plan to take down the imposter with the reader leading the battle when their older.

Every one plans to take down the imposter once the reader is older however some would rather have the reader their child live like a normal kid and not worshiped.

The truth about the reader is kept hidden from the public (with exceptions) no matter who is raising them.

Yae miko, Zhongli, and Columbina would tell the reader the truth about their 'mother' once there about the age of six-7 the rest would wait until the reader is 11-15 to tell them the truth

The reader's personality differs based on who raised them. With Diluc the reader is surprisingly cheerful, they often sneak out, and go on little adventures but always return home. (Although there were a few times when Jean and Kaeya had to bring them home )

The reader raised by Zhongli is quiet and reserved, they also have a kind and gentle disposition, and they are a soft-spoken individual.

The reader raised by Yae Miko is very studious, they are sarcastic and snarky. They are known for their silver-tough and quick wit. However they do like being alone often than not.

The reader raised by Alhaitham and Kaveh is creative. They are a bookworm with a penchant for creating things( mini clay sculpture, clothing, dances) this reader is always active and always willing to learn

The reader is raised by Neuvillette as too kind for their own good. This reader is a little naive, a little soft, and just a little bit ill-equipped for the life they got handed. They don't like loud noise, they don't like big crowds, but they do like magic and a good story. This reader for all of their faults has a strong sense of justice and wants every thing to be as fair as can be.

A reader raised by Columbina ( and the harbingers) is a dreamy doe-eyed child, they at first comes off as helpless, however, they are not. This reader is a playful flirt. Like the reader raised by yae miko this reader also has a sliver-tough. The are good at lowering people guards and getting information from them.

I'm going to expand on this at a later date but for now this is all that I can think of. I tried to keep the reader gender neutral but if there is a few female prouned used please tell me so I can fix it

My ask box is opened

[thesirencult]

THE TRUTH ABOUT ESCAPING TWIN FLAMES AND OTHER MLM NEW AGE BULLSHIT

"You don't get rich writing science fiction. If you want to get rich, you start a religion."

L. Ron Hubbard (Founder of Scientology)

I won't lie to you. What got me into tarot was a very raw and real dream about a man I've never met in my life. I had this dream when I was 15 and it felt like I was floating in a parallel universe.

Dreams with this "stranger" kept coming and going and during a search I stumbled upon the concept of "twin flames".

As with anything NeW AgE it is nothing new. All New Age bullshit are concepts familiar to human civilizations for thousands of years. In all ancient cultures these concepts show up again and again.

Astrology, cartomancy and other forms of divination and guidance have been used by Mesopotamians, Egyptians, Greeks and Hindu people for centuries. They were villainized after the come up of Christianity.

I always have believed there is a higher power. Some name it Allah, others Moses, other Dias etc. Doesn't matter, it's one God above us. Actually contrary to what many want you to believe the Ancient Greeks didn't have "12 Gods" but 12 (and much much more) expressions of DIVINITY. Metaphors and symbolisms.

Hermes Trismegistus has written everything about "manifestation". Others just repackaged it. Some help us understand the concept and others just want to make a quick buck.

All people have some primal needs. Connection and love. Money and wealth. Wanting to be beautiful and powerful. Some people prey on that and, in my opinion, the self-improvement industry will only keep on growing.

The concept of twin flames can be found being expressed by Socrates in the dialogue "Symposium" by Plato :

“Now, since their natural form had been cut in two, each one longed for its own other half, and so they would throw their arms about each other, weaving themselves together, wanting to grow together...

This, then, is the source of our desire to love each other. Love is born into eve­ry human being: it calls back the halves of our original nature together; it tries to make one out of two and heal the wound of human nature.

Each of us, then, is a ‘matching half’ of a human whole, because each was sliced like a flatfish, two out of one, and each of us is always seeking the half that matches him."

Sidenote: Obviously I used only two snippets of the dialogue. Socrates' stance on homosexuality and other matters of love can be found in there and it is a good read. It will definitely show you that some concepts have been around since humans walked on this earth.

Moving on, I want to give you some tips on how to best use astrology and tarot/oracle cards as TOOLS to better yourself.

1. First try them yourself.

Don't let others dictate how you see astrology and tarot. Go online and search up your birth chart on astroseek or visit the Light Seer's Tarot/Muse Tarot website which has an incredible pick a card feature.

Don't contact an astrologer or tarot reader before familiarising yourself with the tools and "taking the magic out" of them.

2. No one and mean NO ONE can predict the future 100%.

In our lives there are moments who seem synchronized. They make you believe in fate. I do believe that God intended for us to live through some things but I also absolutely believe in FREE WILL. I always say that to clients especially those who have tarot readings.

Tarot and astrology can help you see the paths laid in front of you. They help you dive in your unconscious mind. Don't let anyone fool you that they are magical and whatever the cards say can not change.

3. If you purchase a reading don't purchase a love/romance one at first.

Don't get me wrong. I love love and romance. I love doing love readings. They are sweet and sexy.

BUT. Even in my love readings I incorporate a "general energy of you" for the person. I do that cause I want to show to my client, who trusted me and chose me that a tarot reader can be vetted.

Sadly even with PAC readings I can see that the romance ones are read and reposted way more than ones that assist with personal development. I try to keep a balance and do both.

The thing is a good tarot reader, astrologer even a therapist or a fitness trainer want to help you become INDEPENDENT. I don't want you to keep coming back and purchase love readings about your ex.

It's toxic. I won't accept that.

4. You are perfect the way you are.

Telling you that "yeah, you have an issue right here and it can be fixed by doing so and so" is okay.

Telling you that "YOU SHOULD LOVE YOURSELF. YOU DON'T LOVE YOURSELF THAT'S WHY YOU WON'T FIND LOVE UNTIL YOU DO THAT" is toxic. People control you this way.

It's like saying give me more money. Ask me how I can make you LOVABLE.

Your other half won't cheat, manipulate or make you feel awful. Your ex who was an asshole is not your Twin Flame.

Light up the flame within and love out your dreams. You will attract people who will adore and love you by being AUTHENTIC.

Anyone that abuses you and puts your flame out should GO.

5. All big corporations prey on your weaknesses & Do not trust anyone who tells you they are the only ones that can set you free or solve your issues.

Be disciplined. Control yourself and your mind. Read "The 48 Laws Of Power" and other books on influence and manipulation. Learn how narcissists and cult leaders operate.

All big companies do not sell you products (I will probably post this part by itself too).

They sell you emotions, feelings, status. BMW doesn't sell cars, it is selling power and prestige and confidence.

Nike doesn't sell shoes and shirts, it is selling dreams of being powerful and different, of making it in the jungle, of WINNING.

But there are some companies which I'M NOT GOING TO MENTION by name who influence you by breaking you down. Astrology apps that send you negative predictions about your day to make you anxious so you will check back every single hour. Cult like influencers who sell "How to get rich quickly" courses that cost thousands of $ and offer no value.

Be careful. Be prepared. Be strong and firm.

I hope everyone who was taken in this cult (wait ! myy username is the siren cult, lol) can find peace and the power within them.

[talaok]

Hot teach

Pairing: Joel Miller x reader

Summary: you force Joel to go ice-skating

Warnings: none I think, just Joel being a touchy menace

A/n: I'm not gonna lie, I wrote this mostly for myself cause I went icekating today and a girl is obsessed and I couldn't help but wonder how it would have been with my man. also i do be a lil bit tipsy so forgive me if this isn't really all that great, i just wanted to write something cute to daydream about when im falling asleep

"oh c'mon babe you're not even trying!" you laughed, watching as he gripped the banister for dear life

"I am, trust me I am, this thing it's just hard" he grunted, almost falling in the process of trying to look at you

"Joel Miller" you stated, moving so you were in front of him "You've done harder things in your life" you said, raising an eyebrow, "now c'mon, take my hands and get away from there"

He sighed, looking down at those deathly ice skates attached to his feet 

"darlin' if I die 'cause of this I'll be real mad"

"you won't die" you chuckled, holding out your hands for him "now c'mon, hold onto me"

And with great difficulty, and very very slowly, he managed to do it, he was finally away from the edge of the skate rink.

"there, see, wasn't that hard"

"I wouldn't say that exactly"

"oh shut up" you rolled your eyes "Now just like I taught you: bend your knees, then lift one foot, and try to gly"

You watched as he just stood there, looking at you uncertainly

"I'll be here the whole time, I won't let go" you promised, trying to calm his nerves

"sweetheart I don't know if I'm cut out for this type of stuff"

You smiled, reducing the distance between you

"You can do it, baby" you murmured, kissing his cheek "Just give it a try, trust me"

And so he did, almost falling, but he did nonetheless.

"there" you grinned "that was good"

"you ain't gotta lie now doll" he shook his head "Those kids over there are doing better than me" he joked, his eyes going to a group of 10-year-olds to your right

You couldn't help but laugh

"I meant for the first try" you explained "You just need a little practice"

That's how the next half hour passed: practicing.

He kept holding onto you as you skated backward to follow his movements while he moved towards you, and with time, he was even able to skate by your side, his hand still in yours and at a speed slower than a turtle's, but still, it was definitely an improvement.

Convincing him to go ice skating with you hadn't been an easy task, but (as always) you had done it. I mean, it was almost Christmas and they had built a big ice skating ring so close to your house, what else were you supposed to do but drag him to it?

"you're basically a professional" You smiled as you took a break, holding on to the edge of the rink

"absolutely" he laughed "I'm sure that kid I almost killed while falling would also agree"

"Oh yes" you giggled "I'm sure he would"

A moment passed, as you let the sound of laughter and Christmas music flow into your ears 

"You're beautiful sweetheart" he murmured, his hand now holding your waist and making you face him

"where's that coming from?" you smiled, raising your hand to fix his hair, just for it to fall to his shoulder

"I've been thinking it all day, I was just a little preoccupied before" 

"is that right?"

"sure is" he smirked, the distance between you now completely gone "You're hot when you teach me stuff, y'know?"

You laughed "Oh yeah?"

"yeah" he breathed, ghosting his lips "I've got the most gorgeous teacher in the world," he said, a moment before kissing you, like really kissing you, like it didn't matter that people and kids were all around you type of kiss.

You whimpered into his mouth as his hands traveled lower to find your ass through your jeans.

"I know what you're doing mister" you purred, leaving a quick kiss on his lips again 

"oh yeah and what's that?" he asked, not giving you time to answer before he was devouring you again, his tongue exploring your mouth ever so heavenly

"I'm sorry to break it to you Miller, but you aren't gerring out of this so easily" you smiled, crushing all his hopes "We've paid for another hour, and I'm not letting it go to waste"

"sugar c'm-"

"don't even try baby" You shook your head, leaving a soft kiss on his reddened nose "you still have a lot of practice to do" you smirked, "but hey at least you've got a hot teach"

[the-hydroxian-artblog]

Are Merch Mimics capable of using assimilation offensively against humans, for self-defense and otherwise? Like, if someone tried to break a toy/game/etc they were inhabiting, could the Mimic instead pull them in?

To a degree, yeah. I should mention though that Victor isn't "in" the TV in any magical sense; spoiler alert: he's the controller Vance is holding! Hence, the eye on the controller reacting to the dialogue. The Victor on the screen is actualy a model he rigged for a homebrew game he coded the old fashioned way, which responds to whatever inputs the controller sends to the Wii.

He actually is an active member of the homebrew community, and loves to mess with electronics the old fashioned way. Almost no one on the forums knows he's a toy bird, but are impressed nonetheless with his little projects, various rail-shooter games, and weird obsession with snarky anthropomorphic birds.

Victor could technically "jump into a game" on a tv screen, but it'd be a bit of a weird process if he doesn't know how to mod the game, so it'd look more like a shitty greenscreen effect rather than anything coherent. He'd need to learn in real time how the game is coded, how to inject arbitrary code into the system while it's running, etc etc. He CAN do that because he's a fucking NERD, but it wouldn't be a quick process at all.

I should also mention, mimics have an inherent ability to create dreams, since they come about from processing the thoughts and ideas of humans. If a human bonds with a mimic, such that the mimic now knows how the human thinks, they can pull a (somewhat) willing human into the dream when the human sleeps. So to wrap this all up: what Victor could do for a game he understands inside and out is pull a human into a dream that happens to match whatever he himself experiences as currently going on in the game. Basically the ultimate VR experience, with the mimic as a middle-man. Which might be something that'll happen in the comic soon....!

So that all seems a bit convoluted, right? Here's even more worldbuilding about matter assimilation by mimics below the cut. Stop here if you don't want a headache.

The reason so many hoops would be needed to pull a human into a game world is that assimilation is much easier on inert, inanimate objects that are not currently "in use" by a thinking thing, or something that relies on constant electrical signals to function. This can be something with brainwaves, or some other kind of animation like a normal robot. A mimic can convert a CRT TV that's turned off somewhat easily, but a TV that's turned on, with particles of every kind constantly moving into and out of it, is much harder to convert.

This means that humans and biological creatures in general are also trickier to convert, though it can still happen if done gradually enough. Hence, Victor wouldn't be able to rapidly convert Vance in one fell swoop, it'd be a whole process. It's easier to just pull a human into a dream instead, and if a mimic understands a video game, or a story in a book really well, they can basically make the fictional world into an extremely lucid reality for whatever human tags along with them.

I often describe mimics as just "jojo stands if they were corporeal and could just get up and move around on their own with no user"; you know how in jojo stand battles or old stories about magic curses, if you break the curse or kill the stand before its effect becomes permanent, all of the damage is magically undone? Like if you kill Green Day, the mold stand, all of the molding just instantly stops?

Mimics who use their powers of assimilation offensively work similarly; they can project their influence to a certain range, and partially assimilate matter in that range. If you knock out or kill the mimic, however, everything reverts to normal. A human who doesn't want to get converted can basically just turn around and walk away most of the time, or shoot the mimic, so the mimic in question needs to pull off some trick to get the human to stay within range for the assimilation to fully stick. A human can still break free and get out of range even if fully converted, but it's much harder, as assimilation usually means the mimic gaining greater control over the converted object in question. The exact range and effect mimics have is again like jojo stand ranges; it varies.

Different mimics have different affinities for different things. Victor can assimilate cheap electronics fastest because he likes them and understands how they work (it's why he's a toy bird mp3 player). Az can assimilate guns, and turn ammo into weird anomalous ammo with weird effects. Zachary is a genius who can assimilate any matter, including biological matter, faster than anyone... but he's also extremely picky and hates the sight of blood, so he only uses assimilation on things he really, really likes.

If I could somehow make another read more at this point, I would. It's gonna get messy:

What a weird power and setup though, right? Why? The true nature of mimics is unknown to most of them, but the deepest lore is that the first mimics were constructs made by a people long ago, who first made them as highly advanced machines that'd recognize the thoughts of their masters to fulfill any practical desire. Need a road built? Done. Need a ship repaired? Done. With physical needs all met, the people began to turn inward, and use the mimics to illustrate their own artistic ideas. Eventually, the will and consciousness of these people were assimilated and inherited by mimics, who themselves became people. Mimics spread, altered themselves, duplicated, deviated, fused, split, and wandered around. Getting into recreational wars, manifesting horrors and delights into reality because they could.

Somehow, after the dust settled, the strongest mimics, the angels, decide to set their sights to the stars, and observe other lifeforms develop technology and their own art. Did mimics come to earth millions of years ago, and simply watched humans grow, evolving with them in-tandem? Or did humans make the first mimics, and somehow became undone and set back to the stone age? The answer to this mystery is currently known only to the oldest of mimics. Except Zachary. He's old, but didn't care to remember.

This is generally why mimics seem so compatible with humans; they were made by either them, or people who were, for whatever the reason, very much like them, flaws and all. The ability to assimilate is basically the conversion of matter into a more malleable state of information. A virtually magical power, but this was achieved not through prayers and spells, but a very human-like obsession with developing technology to the point of exerting control over molecules, then atoms, then the lowest planks of matter. The obsession with scaling every mountain and crossing through every valley. To rip the natural world apart, and hopefully, put it back together before it's too late. Angels seek to ensure humanity walks the right path there, but with human's own desires and intent honored, for better or worse.

To answer your question: yes. A mimic of Mario can pull you into the game and you can jump with him and eat shitty low poly spaghetti with him.

The process for doing that is just convoluted and complicated, and you need to get to know each other a bit first. If he tries to use it as an attack though, it either won't work, or it might just wind up giving you mild brain damage.

[meraki-yao]

Now I'm curious to know all the "candies" between Nick and Tay 👀 lol I don't ship them but I also find it interesting that some fans really ship real people together and gather evidence or proof of it. If its fine with you to share it pls do 🙏 but if not its also fine :)

Huh...

Actually, sure! I kinda wanted to share some of these at times but again I understand that rps is a complicated subject.

A couple of quick prefaces though:

1, If you’re uncomfortable with the subject, again, please don’t read under the post

2, I don’t have all the candies because I really just view them in passing, so I’m just gonna write/translate the ones I’ve seen, remember and find at least a logical speculation

3, I need to reiterate this in case my position in this gets misunderstood: Me writing about “candies” isn’t because these are MY opinion or things *I* found or *I* believe in them being evidence. I am just a translator and messenger.

4, (this one is gonna sound a little academic lol) Two things I realized when thinking about this “candy eating” culture is that Chinese people have a very difference understanding of platonic/romantic affection/relationships with the Western world, and that they look at the candies with rose-tinted glass. Chinese/Asian people are generally a lot less affectionate with their personal relationships, for example friends wouldn’t say “love you” to each other if they’re just friends, nor would they expand their friend group to the others easily or other stuff. And these people who look for candy go into their “investigation” already with the belief that “they are together”, everything remotely resembling a close relationship will automatically be interpreted as romantic. I thought about it a lot, and honestly among the “candies” I’ve seen, most of them are a matter of interpretation: yes those are things couples will do, but it wouldn’t be weird if friends did it too. So they’re not that seriously or up for further speculation. There is I think only one “candy” that I can’t quite say the same, which I will explain and elaborate on in this post. 

5, Please remember that the people who do this do it in good nature: something I didn’t make clear in my post yesterday, which is on me, is that the fans do want them to be together, but they’re not like… yandere level or something. If they’re just friends the fans won’t be upset or betrayed or anything, they just prefer to see them as romantic. They don’t mean any harm, and they don’t cause any harm because China is physically and digitally too far away for them to actually fuck shit up, and they understand the lines of parasocial relationships: those who met with Taylor during his China trip in December know to, and didn’t bring up this in front of him. They know where to draw the line, and whoever doesn’t and starts becoming a problem gets kicked out of the community. This is meant for fun.

6, Ok Future Meraki here, turns out, there’s a lot to translate, a lot more than I anticipated Jesus Christ and I do want to get this post how within today and make it a reasonable length, so I’m just gonna do two events and the one that I mentioned in 4. If yall want a part 2 let me know.

Ok with that being said, the main event under the cut:

In December they made a whole article about “candies” from December, and to quickly summarise (again noted that all of this is speculation, I didn’t and can’t fact check them, and I’m just a translator) (also this ended up way longer than I anticipated so for photo reference if you can please go to the link of the original article):

Academy Gala:

Nick and Taylor both attended the gala: Since the strike ended up to that point, the two times Nick attends a public event, Taylor’s there too (GQ men of the year and Academy Gala), and for both times he’s wearing Cartier’s Tank Must Watch (remember this watch, I’m gonna elaborate on it later because it is the only candy that even I can’t say it’s a matter of interpretation)

In various pictures of the night’s party that other people took, the boys can be seen together in the background

How the photography worked that night was magazine photographers wandered around the venue and randomly found people to take some relatively candid photos: so people who were walking/sitting/in any way sticking together would be photographed together. So best friends and married couples would be photographed together, which is what happened to Meryl Streep, Greta Gerwig, Saoirse Ronan, and Christopher Nolan, Cillian Murphy and their wives. With that logic, Taylor and Nick were caught by the photographer together TWICE, in clearly different places. Later Korean fans (with the same “candy-searching” mindset) read the time on Taylor’s watch in the photos: one was 8:30, one was 9:50. The implication is that they were together for at least that period of time (nearly 1.5 hours)

In both photos of the boys together, Nick’s elbow is…straight up leaning into Taylor's chest. In a photo with Kaia, Nick’s friend and co-star from Bottoms (Brittany), there’s visible space between Nick and Kaia but none between Nick and Taylor (… okay I’m gonna pop in with my own opinion on the latter one real quick: I really think that one is just Nick being a gentleman)  

During that night, Taylor re-posted an Instagram post from July onto Little Red Book: but the things is in the comment section of the original Instagram post, Taylor teasingly pretends to not know Nick; and according to the posting time and the time calculated in 3, Nick would have been watching him post that to Little Red Book.

Nick got a photo with Taylor’s friend Jay Ellis (Jay and Taylor follow each other on Instagram, and Taylor comments under Jay’s post), even though Nick and Jay don’t seem to have any direct connections. Kaia and Taylor started following each other on Instagram after the event.

While other people who got photos with Taylor posted them, in Taylor’s Instagram Post for the night: He only included his photo with Nick, the rest are all solo portraits of himself. Not only that: he edited the background of the photo so it’s just them, and proceeded to put the photo in the middle of the post.

a bunch of Taylor's good friends, including Taylor’s cousin went to like Nick’s post for the academy gala night. Taylor’s sister Ash shared Taylor’s post to her stories: 2 photos of Taylor himself, and the one photo of Taylor and Nick. Taylor mentioned in a past interview if he had any emotional or relationship (I don’t know which one is the right translation, the original wording is 感情) issues, he would talk to Ash. (please note that I didn’t not and don’t know how to fact-check any of the things mentioned above except for Ash’s Instagram)

Conclusion/ Speculation (okay the academy gala part alone took me 40 minutes what the fuck): I cannot reiterate this enough: THIS IS JUST SPECULATION DO NOT TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY but under the assumption that Taylor and Nick are a thing, the serious of shenanigans that happened that night, especially with the family and friends stuff in 6,7,8, was interpreted as they announcing it to their personal social circle. AGAIN THIS IS SPECUALTION DON’T TAKE THIS SERIOSULY 

Taylor’s China Trip

On 7th December, Taylor had a photo shoot at the GQ gala venue, but spent the rest of the afternoon taking photos and signing things for fans. Among those, one was the photo of him and Nick from the academy gala just three days ago. He was visibly extra happy and showed off the photo to the crowd, unlike the other photos which he simply gets it, signs it, and then gives it back.

This day was also the start of “Taylor giving Nick/Henry a moustache”: throughout the trip, he drew on four photos of the two of them

(This one is a … really big stretch) among the four, one of them was the GQ magazine shoot, and he first drew the moustache on Nick’s face, giggling “I’ll sign on Nick’s face”, signed his own signature, then just when he was about to give the magazine back he suddenly changed his mind and said “wait wait I wanna do something on my face”, and then drew a crown on his head while muttering “crown prince”. And the thing is… historically, George Villers had a moustache. And then he drew a moustache on Nick and a crown on himself. Also, one of the most popular Chinese RWRB fic on AO3 is called “The King’s Palace”, and the premise is putting Henry in George place as the social climber and the Duke of Buckingham (it is literally George’s character with blonde hair and a different name), and Alex as the crown prince who ascended to the throne and is also utterly infatuated with Henry. So… yeah.

When he drew the fourth photo, which was the piano scene, the fan who asked said “Oh you’re so nice to Nick!” and according to their description (there’s no video), Taylor blushed a little and said “yeaahhhhh” with a big grin

While Taylor was in China people were stirring shit up on Twitter about him, and during the Twitter drama, Nick liked Taylor’s Academy Gala post.

The boys liked the same video on Instagram but from different accounts (a video about a pony in the snow)

During the trip, Taylor was seen wearing a white button-up with blue stripes. Nick has been seen wearing a shirt that looks identical before.

Cartier Watch (aka the one that makes me do a double take)

Taylor used to wear a lot of Cartier watches until he started wearing Tagheuer last July due to a commercial partnership

Nick likes wearing Omega watches. In fact, Henry’s watch in the movie is Nick’s own omega watch. He also has a commercial partnership with Omega.

But then starting last year, both of them were seen wearing matching Cartier’s Tank Must Watches (the silver on with a black surface and a sapphire crown): Taylor can be seen wearing it in the 5th photos of his September post, while Nick can be seen wearing it during the GQ gala, the Academy Gala, in Milan during fan interactions, and last weekend in his TIOY co-star’s Instagram story.

And the thing about this watch is (and here is where I need to reiterate that I’m just translating, I didn’t fact check this) 1, watch is a typical thing to give a lover, and you must be familiar with their wrist size 2, Cartier is a pretty romantic brand 3, the price of this watch is closer to what Taylor’s used to wearing but much cheaper than Omega 4, This specific watch is a popular watch to give a partner/lover, 5, David and Victoria Beckham’s relationship was discovered because paparazzi saw the Cartier watch he gave her and connected dots together

Jesus Christ at this point I should consider getting a part time job in translation

This was fun but this took me so much time, it’s ~2000 words long

Again, all of this was found and speculate for fun, and mean no ill will, and haven’t, and won’t harm the boys, please understand that and don’t take this took seriously. If you find this interesting and want a part two, let me know.

[peace-love-and-french-toast]

Severus Snape rant

Disclaimer: I don't support JK Rowling's views and I'm not a TERF. TERFs, DNI for you.

Sorry for ranting, y'all. I'll try to keep things quick (note from the future: be warned. I failed). Spoilers and mentions of friendship toxicity and bullying under the cut.

By the way, for this I am generally talking about regular canon. When I discuss things people think about this, the headcanons are generally assumed to go alongside regular canon to complement it. I understand that there are fix-it fics out there where everyone is happy, and while I love that, I'm talking about how JK Rowling let it play out.

UPDATE:

Don’t interact with this post if you only want to insult me/my writing style. I am not accusing anyone of doing this, but I can see that there is a very definitive downward spiral, and I don’t want to see the bottom of it. However, I am willing to listen to arguments until things turn into personal attacks.

I don’t care that much about Snape: just a few lines on a page. I understand people have strong opinions on him (me too!). That’s fine. But I’m a real person, just like all the people on this platform (well, except bots). Let’s embrace that, and focus on the fact that we are all, in the end, Harry Potter fans.

Kat out.

Let me start with this: Severus Snape shouldn't be with Lily.

To keep to the simple stuff and the things most people can agree on first, no one "deserves" Lily. In this post, I was nearly guilty myself of talking like this, but please keep in mind: Lily Evans is not some kind of consolation prize, something given out to whoever is deemed the most worthy, the most angsty, whatever. Regardless of Snape's virtues (or lack of them: but give me a sec) he won't somehow earn the right to be in a romantic pairing with Lily. In all the stuff on the table in terms of how Lily viewed Snape, she wanted a platonic relationship. So that's part of what I have an issue with: talking about canon as if there was any part of romantic thing on the table. Lily never had a crush on Snape. It was a one-sided thing.

Now, to controversy. Let's address some common reasons for why people say Lily shouldn't have ditched Snape and why these shouldn't excuse his behavior. Keep in mind I'm talking about things that happened before Lily's death, because after death doesn't really matter to her. She's dead by then.

Snape had a bad home/school life.

That's true. But he then chose to continue the cycle of pain by joining a pureblood supremacist group and calling fellow students slurs?

2. The Marauders did some terrible stuff to him.

I really need a disclaimer here. THIS WAS TERRIBLE, AND I HATED IT, AND THE MARAUDERS WERE COMPLETELY IN THE WRONG HERE.

But this post isn't defending the Marauders, it's arguing that Lily was justified in choosing to let go of their friendship.

Anyway, this is an irrelevant excuse for why Lily should remain friends with him, because she thought this was terrible too... and then Severus screamed a slur at her when she was trying to help him. Way to go, Snape.

3. He loved Lily.

Hold up. Stop the clock.

Wut.

Wut.

Okay, this needs to be a new section. Let's call it:

Being In Love With Someone Doesn't Excuse Your Actions Towards Them

Quick story time, cause this section uses an extensive metaphor. IRL, I used to be best friends with this girl. She was toxic and refused to change.

Her excuses for why I should keep hanging out with her?

Current mental health situation.

Things just "slipped out". (Yeah, Snape LITERALLY USED THIS EXACT EXCUSE)

I was really important to her (So was Lily to Snape)

I stopped being friends with this girl regardless, because her actions harmed my mental health, isolated me, etc.

(And before someone says friendship is different etc. she had a crush on me two Valentine's days in a row and I'm unsure if she still does)

These are all excuses. Let's define that word for a second.

"attempt to lessen the blame attaching to (a fault or offense); seek to defend or justify." -Oxford Languages from Google.

Contrast with an apology, where someone actually tries to make things better. Snape constantly gives excuses. His apology comes much, much too late in the form of begging Lily. Now, with my own toxic friend, she also claimed to want to make things better.

In the case of both Snape and Toxic Friend, they'd continually insisted it wasn't their fault, ignoring the problems in the relationship and not making an effort to fix them. By the time Lily and I broke things off, we'd made up our minds. We turned away and felt good about it, because they negatively impacted our lives.

Maybe Snape was in love. Maybe my friend really wanted to be friends with me. Both are probable.

Still, neither followed through on the steps necessary for a good friendship.

Depersonification, aka Lily is a Person Not A Shiny Toy, Severus

Crack open your books, hit play on the movie, or simply recall as we all remember how Snape looked at Lily.

In the books (won't mention the movies because I didn't watch them) he looks at Lily and Harry sees "undisguised greed" in his eyes. Um...

Snape's fine with hurting Petunia, figuratively and literally.

He ignores what Lily is actually trying to say to him once she tells him what he wants to hear.

And calling her Mudblood. (Can't help myself interrupting here: I myself never 'just accidentally' call someone a racial slur. That's because I don't use them, so they aren't exactly waiting on the tip of my tongue).

All of the things he does are in there for a reason. JK Rowling is trying to unsettle us, and she succeeded. Snape seems to view Lily as an accomplishment, an achievement, a plaything to be admired.

Why?

He never takes Lily's feelings into consideration. Not once until it negatively impacts him. Look at where he comforts Lily: when it looks like they've made a mistake and hurt Petunia.

When Lily gives up on him.

And I know: there was more, there was more, there was more.

Potions homework done together.

Eager chatter between classes.

It's not black and white.

But these are the scenes JK Rowling has decided will give you the best impression of their friendship. She didn't pick tender scenes with cocoa and cookies because that isn't a theme in this friendship.

And onwards to:

They Used To Be Friends, Why Did Lily Stop Talking To Him Like This

It's hard to know what a person is truly like. You only know what people show you, and they hold back the worst of themselves at first. In Lily's first scenes, she doesn't know everything. She doesn't see the greedy looks he gives her. He is a new boy about her age who understands her like nobody else in town could.

Years go by. He calls people like her "Mudblood", he makes friends with awful classmates who do illegal and immoral things and are rumored to be training for war. The other side of the war, the one that kills people.

He shows her the worse sides.

By the time he calls her Mudblood, she has already tried to stop him from going down the wrong path. He's ignored her and ignored her and she finally snaps.

Can you blame her?

This apology seems like yet another excuse, a means to an end of keeping her by his side.

She's had enough.

Conclusion

So concludes the saga of Lily and Severus.

As he makes his decisions and she hers, Lily perishes saving a son whom Snape will later torment in her classes.

Harry grows up.

Snape oversees the creation of a school designed for indoctrination, watching passively as cruciatus curses are dished out. Her son meets him on the battlefield.

Voldemort gets to Snape first.

And thus, Snape meets his end.

And that's it, because things work out like that sometimes. Snape chose his path in life. Lily responded accordingly. And years later, he continued to stay stagnant in character growth, even becoming a child's worst fear from his unequally distributed cruelty.

A note:

If you disagree, feel free to debate me! I enjoy calm discussions. HOWEVER, please remember that we are all, in the end, people with lives and feelings, so don’t scream at me if you don’t agree with what I’ve said here.

[everythingne]

hey yall :D!

i've just moved back into my dorm for classes today but i don't start any actual work for a while. im gonna be a bit slower now with work and such but I wanted to let y'all know of some upcoming fics to expect :)! please let me know if any specific ones interest you as i am in a bit of a slump and any encouragement seriously helps <3

-

growing pains - dr3

(3+1) three times the girls pain makes you and daniel realize they're not always going to be your little ones. (a first period, a first breakup, and moving out) and one time, the girls come back to show all the lessons you've taught them, and that no matter their age they'll always be your little girls.

mrs mclaren - ln4

the winner of the mini series vote for my 300 follower special was lando, friends to lovers/mutual pining, angst/whatever. so born from that is y/n mclaren, the granddaughter of bruce mclaren, who may just have a huge crush on her driver and somehow literally everyone but lando knows.

wasted summers - op81

to try and solve your huge two decades old crush on your childhood best friend, you attempt to capture his love over the short summer break, with the help of F1 twitter and other racers. it goes about how you would expect.

gripped - ln4

Roxanne Powell's quick thinking on a film set saves Lando from serious injury, the moment making an unlikely connection between one of the top Formula One drivers who takes all the fame and glory for his team, and a girl whose work is hardly credited to herself. it takes seeing the other side to open your eyes.

more below (max n logan)

the one with the wedding - mv1

max grapples with the fact he's getting married on his wedding day. slightly inspired by friends and real weddings i've attended. luckily charles and daniel are there to ease his fears, and you end up having a picture perfect monaco wedding.

akin to a pride verse - 'i truly am my fathers child' - mv1

when brought to tears by ruthless bullying by reporters, reina snaps and hits a reporter out of fear, but the media claims its anger. with no other option, hana flies max to london help her daughter out of a depressive episode caused by reina realizing she's more like her father than she ever wants to be. its a conversation that makes max think back on his actions too.

drunk walk home verse - 'stalkers tango' - mv1

isaiah doesn't go away, not after max nearly shatters his nose. late night phone calls, text messages, and dms lead to a break in that terrifies you and the f1 world. luckily, you're away for the break in, but its not safe for you to return alone. don't worry though, max enlists the help of a few drivers to move all your stuff to his while you 'hunt for apartments.'

wing damage ch 2 - mv1

nadine struggles to accept the fact that she's single and alone in her now too big yet claustrophobic apartment. luckily for her, max is only a phone call away. and a few too many drinks lead to what is probably the stupidest decision for two newly single people who are hurting in their own rights.

meet cute, stay cute - ls2

logan keeps having meet-cutes with you throughout london, noticing the same thing each time, a book tucked under your arm. when you move in next door, he capitalizes on the opportunity to make this meet cute permanent by buying you romance books he's recommended by friends and twitter as a means of flirting.

out of the woods ch3 - ls2

dhanishka struggles to accept the fact that even her best performances can be deemed unfit, and the actions of herself when shes drunk. logan struggles to accept he may have cut things off early. charles needs more wine to deal with this.

go fins! - ls2

logan is only following one miami dolphins cheerleader, you. and you don't think its a big deal until he comes to visit to get an honorary helmet for the miami gp, and they have you give it to him. the clips circle for weeks, begging to know if you're dating the driver, and sometimes its more fun to make a rumor be true than to shut it down.

[nekropsii]

Small Atomic Ask Bomb!!

I've got a bunch of short asks that I'd hate to spam the dash with individually, so I'll just put 'em here, under the cut!!

Content Warning: Long, Brief Discussions of Racism, Misogyny, Grooming, Brief Mentions of Incest and Pedophilia in Fanfiction.

I've always been a hater, and I honestly don't really think it's a bad thing - not as much as everyone says, at least! I think being kind of a bitch about things that don't matter is good for you, actually. Gets the urge to be angry out in a way that's healthier than just snapping at people in critical moments. I also just think being strong and passionate in your convictions is good for you. Being a hater gives you a spine if you do it right, and it fires a gunshot and scatters people you don't really want to be around. It also has the funny side effect of people thinking I take things way more seriously than I do, just because I'm opinionated and will state said opinions clearly. Big fan of this meme:

This is me.

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I used to peek in there every now and then, just to be nosy. Incest at the top, always. Or straight up pedo shit. Sigh. Looked in the Mituna tag a couple times. CroTuna fucking nightmare hell dimension, always. Or KanTuna, which I also have gripes with. Or KanMiTula, which I have even more gripes with.

It is my understanding that the state of Homestuck fanfiction hasn't gotten much better since the 2010s. Everyone is wrong and no one is normal. Sad.

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I don't know if the mere act of only making Jade and Jake brown out of all the Kids is Racist on its own, per se, but it is kinda silly in the sense that, you know, John and Jade are siblings, so realistically they'd look similar. And... People absolutely do get racist about it. Like, making Jade and Jake uniquely huge, hairy, threatening, and oddly shaped - gangly in the context of Jade, buff as hell in the context of Jake. I've seen some SEVERELY racist drawings where Jade and/or Jake were the only hints of melanin in the Kid line up and... Oh my god. It can get to straight up caricature levels. Watermelons and everything. Just comedically racist.

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Genuinely one of the dumbest fucking things in the world. People will say literally anything. Saying Damara isn't Japanese is on par with calling Porrim a fucking Men's Rights Activist. It's a funny little claim people who are grievously wrong say as a condemnation of the Alpha Trolls for no reason. Why. To look smart? To fit in? Dumbass. Notice how they always have to invent bullshit lies to critique anything instead of just saying things that are true. It really frustrates me how 99.9% of Alpha Troll criticism just isn't at all legitimate when there's some real, genuine issues you could critique. It's stupid horseshit. I hate it so badly.

I don't actually care whether or not someone likes the Alpha Trolls, but at least hate them accurately. Come on.

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@sleepy-apparition

Everyone is so, so quick to turn a blind eye to just how violently misogynistic Kankri is, lmfao. Genuinely, I don't think I've ever seen anyone other than myself bring up the fact that he's an avid Slut-Shamer in the modern day. Other than that, I only really saw older Mituna fanatics bring it up over in the early-mid 2010s, but none of them are around these days.

Genuinely, some of the shit he says is so appalling, lol. Kankri FULLY deserves to get his ass beat.

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I have said this before but I'll say it again - I do not think a Red Romantic Relationship will fix Dirk, or even really help him all that much. Before he gets into a RedRom, he needs some therapy, a break, and mood stabilizers.

However, I'm thoroughly of the opinion that a good BlackRom could work wonders on him, way more than a RedRom would. I think a solid, established Pitch Relationship with, like, Caliborn would be genuinely great for him, both mentally and in a Character Development sense. I hold zero interest in watching Dirk and Jake badly fumble a traditional romantic relationship - that notion is painful to me. ... But I do think I could read a full Intermission's worth of Dirk and Caliborn fucking around and not get tired of it once. They have a fantastic dynamic. It'd be good for Caliborn, too, I think.

This has been my Dirkuu propaganda bit. Thank you.

Also, the Voyeuristic feel of how people handle his Mental Illness. It makes me uncomfortable.

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True. I don't have any other remarks to make about this, you're just correct. True.

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... Fuckin'... Why, though? What- what's the appeal? There's nothing there. I literally cannot conceive any way in which that would be compelling, and I'd say Hal and Kankri are pretty high up there in the list of Male Homestuck Characters I Enjoy.

People will do anything but pay attention to Female Characters for five minutes. God. Lol.

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It's literally just DaveKat 2. I don't think it even qualifies as a Crack Ship when it's just a variant of The Fandom's Most Darling M/M OTP. It's just a deeply mid RarePair. Crack Ship would be, like, Dirk Strider x Rainbow Dash.

Dirk x RD was a popular Crack Ship, sure, but it's still a Crack Ship on basis of being a Crossover Pairing.

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I can't recall any specific instances of seeing this myself, but I'll believe it. People will do anything except be normal about Vriska. People will fight the war against Vriska on the side of and against Vriska at the same time. People will call her a Huge 8itch but then call her pathetic when she stops being a Huge 8itch.

We love Misogyny, I guess.

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Well, he is based on Tumblr, after all. Particularly how dogshit the politics are on here. Of course he would. He'd do numbers on here, considering his Woke Hate Speech.

It's called Bubblr, by the way. Like, canonically. We do know what it's called.

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It's actually based on the Three Wise Monkeys. You know, that old Japanese Proverb that goes "See No Evil, Hear No Evil, Speak No Evil"? That.

Kurloz is Speak No Evil, Meulin is Hear No Evil, Mituna is See No Evil.

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Great Question. My personal guess is that he's a little too nuanced for a lot of people to be comfortable with handling. He throws out too much surface-level Bigotry that people aren't willing to ignore because it isn't Racism for many to feel comfortable making him their Blorbo. When Dave says the N-Word and talks about how fucking Racist he is and it literally never gets acknowledged or resolved, that's fine and dandy, but god forbid Caliborn be a Misogynist in the funniest way possible AND have that get acknowledged literally constantly as a problem. The fact that Caliborn isn't a Fuckable White 13-Year-Old Twink means none of his crimes are ever forgivable because he's ugly and unshippable, or whatever.

The fact that he's Mentally Disabled doesn't help. People can't fucking STAND IT when a character is Mentally Disabled in a way that isn't Cute and Consumable, much less a character who is Unconsumably Mentally Disabled AND Complicated. It's just not allowed!!