#it's just funny sometimes that characters who are embarrassed to even suggest that they like another person

[chodzacaparodia]

Sometimes it really amuses me that in some stories the characters have to cross the magical border of the love confession so that they completely forget about their previous shyness and throw themselves at each other in a mad rush of desire, using really dirty language during sex.

[love-takes-work]

I've seen a fair number of people interpret Rebecca Sugar's (and the Crew's) decision to put Ruby in a dress as subversive, and I want to discuss why that feels like a clear miss to me.

Every time--every single time--I've heard Rebecca Sugar talk about the queer relationships on this show, it comes with this expression of wholesomeness, and often glazed with a sheen of wistfulness, flavored something like "I needed this as a child and young person, and I didn't have it." Much of Rebecca Sugar's work to bring this wedding (and other unapologetic queer relationships) to the screen was framed as an emergency--as in, we HAVE to get this out there for those kids we used to be, because we know they're drowning.

Yes, it's funny sometimes when people make jokes about Sugar deliberately "adding more gay" or "making it gayer" as a big eff-you to the people who spoke against it, but that doesn't sit right from where I'm standing. It took so much strength (and resulted in so much battle damage) to fight that fight, yes. But from everything I can see from the interviews and conversations I've seen and read, this wasn't served up in a "ha-HA, take THAT!" kind of way. These characters having these kinds of relationships should have been a non-issue, and the fact that their very wholesome kids'-show wedding and very sweet kiss and very adorable love for each other was seen as Political when it should have been just two characters in love is so sad to me.

I've seen dozens of people suggest that Ruby is in a dress and Sapphire is in a suit "to fuck with the bigoted censors in other countries" or "to give the finger to gender roles," but again, I think it is simpler and sweeter than that. Rebecca's said that Ruby in a dress is how she feels in a dress. Celebration and exploration of feminine-coded stuff felt wrong to Rebecca for a long time, like it wasn't hers, because she wasn't really a woman and didn't want it forced on her. As a result she was robbed of all the beauty that should have been a non-issue, from what TV shows and toys she was supposed to enjoy as a kid to what kind of person she was supposed to marry and what she should wear as an adult.

Ruby never got a choice about how she looked really. Once she got to choose her presentation for a significant event, this is what she chose. It means so much more to see that than to construct it primarily as a reactionary measure, as if it would somehow foil the sinister censors in more homophobic countries (who, incidentally, are not therefore forced to show Ruby in a dress even though they tried to hide that Ruby was a "she" or that she was in a romantic relationship with another "she"; y'all, they just don't show the episode).

We see plenty of other examples of gender-role-related expectations being casually stepped on and squashed, like when they took the trouble to give traditionally masculine and traditionally feminine "clothes" to some watermelons to make the audience think there was a husband and wife watermelon only to have the wife be the warrior and the husband stay home with the child. With stuff like that, yeah, sure, maybe it's designed to make you think "oh isn't that very feminist of them!" Or maybe it's more "well why do I see this as a 'reversal' when it's just a thing that happened?" This show is full of ladyish beings who fight and have power. And as for Steven. . . .

Nobody has negative reactions onscreen (or even particularly confused reactions) when Steven wears traditionally feminine clothes, and it is (of course) also not presented as a "boy in a dress gag"--it's not supposed to be funny. When they go all in slathering Steven in literal princess tropes throughout the final act of Season 5, we understand that it's because the powerful Diamonds expect him to be Pink Diamond, not because the show is trying to girlify him or embarrass him or even make the audience think positive thoughts about boys in girls' clothes. It's more neutral than that in my interpretation: "these are literally just pieces of cloth, and while some of them have meaning, they don't inherently have a gender." I don't see this as transgressive. It's just in a world where putting on what you want to wear doesn't HAVE to be a political statement. (Though obviously it CAN be, and plenty of people wear a variety of clothes as a fuck-you to whoever they want to give the finger to. I just don't see that as happening here.)

Don't get me wrong; Rebecca Sugar certainly knew about the politics (intimately) and has lived at many of their intersections. She was not ignorant of how queer people are seen in this world. She was silenced as a bisexual person because her identity supposedly didn't matter if she was with a man and planned to be with that same man forever. She was shunted into "omg a woman did this!" categories over and over again, which she wore uneasily as a nonbinary person while accepting that part of who we are is how the world sees us. But what is it like if everything someone like her embraces is seen as a statement synonymous with "fuck you" to someone else?

She is married to a person who happens to be a man and happens to be Black. Her relationship isn't a "statement" about either of those aspects of his existence; her love is simply something that is. She is Jewish working in a society that's largely Christian. Her cultural perspective to NOT center her cartoon around Christian holidays and Christian morals; her choices to make an alternate world in this specific way is simply something that is. Her queer perspective as a nonbinary bisexual person has helped inform the Gems' radical philosophy of "what if we learned to explore and define ourselves instead of doing the 'jobs' we're assigned and being told it's our nature?" Her decision to include queer people in a broadly queer cartoon isn't designed PRIMARILY as a battle against baddies, or to drown out all the relentless straightness, or to deliciously get our queer little paws all over their kids' TV. It's an act of love.

So this is just to say that though I DO understand that sometimes subversion and intentional transgression are very necessary, I do not think that's the HEART of what's going on at this Gem wedding. We got a wholesome marriage scene between two of the most lovely little flawed-but-still-somehow-perfect characters, and I very much want to see their choices as being about them. About how Ruby feels in a dress. About how Sapphire feels about not having to always wear a dress. About them incorporating a symbol of their union into their separate lives so they can have some independence in their togetherness. About them celebrating their love by letting Steven wipe his schmaltz all over them.

There are many choices in the show that ARE carefully constructed to counter existing narratives, you know, giving the Crystal Gems' only boy all the healing, pink, flower imagery; having a single-sex species that's ladyish with all the members going by "she"; featuring many nurturing male characters who cry and cook and raise kids without mothers; pairing multiple fighty ladies with gentler guys; and importantly, intentionally loading up the show with stories, characters, and imagery any gender will find appealing despite being tasked with expectations to pander to the preteen boy demographic.

But it's very important to me that the inclusion of queer characters and the featuring of their choices be seen primarily as a loving act, and way way less of a "lol screw the bigots." I want our stories to be about us. Yes, I know it's a necessary evil that sometimes our stories are also about fighting Them. But every time I see someone say they put Ruby in the dress to "piss off the homophobes" or "stump the censors" I feel a little gross. Like the time I picked out an outfit I loved and my mom said I only dressed in such an obnoxious way to upset her, and I was baffled because my aesthetic choices, my opinions, my choices had nothing to do with her. Yet they were framed like I chose these clothes primarily to cause some kind of petty harm to her, when not only was it not true but I was not even that kind of person who would gloat over intentionally irritating someone.

The queerness of this show isn't a sneaky, underhanded act trying above all to upset a bigot or celebrate someone's homophobic fury. It lives for itself. Its existence is about itself. It's so we can see ourselves in a show, and it's so people who aren't queer or don't have those experiences can see that we exist, we participate, we want very similar things, and definitely are focusing way more about celebrating our love at our own weddings rather than relishing the thought of bigots tearing their hair out and hating us.

It's dangerous to turn every act of our love into a deliberate movement in a battle strategy when their weddings just get to be weddings.

I think there’s this idea that that [queer characters] is something that applies or should be only discussed with adults that is completely wrong. And I think when you realize that talking to kids about heteronormativity is just like air that you breathe all the time, it’s kind of amazing that that is not true in any other capacity. I think if you wait to tell kids, to tell queer youth that it matters how they feel or that they are even a person, then it’s going to be too late! You have to talk about it—you have to let it be what it gets to be for everyone. I mean, like, I think about, a lot of times I think about sort of fairy tales and Disney movies and the way that love is something that is ALWAYS discussed with children. And I think also there’s this idea that’s like, oh, we should represent, you know, queer characters that are adults, because there are adults that are queer, and you should know that’s something that is happening in the adult world, but that’s not how those films or those stories are told to children. You’re told that YOU should dream about love, about this fulfilling love that YOU’RE going to have. […] The Prince and Snow White are not like someone’s PARENTS. They’re something you want to be, that you are sort of dreaming of a future where you will find happiness. Why shouldn’t everyone have that? It’s really absurd to think that everyone shouldn’t get to have that! --Rebecca Sugar

[yurunivo]

Sypnosis: In which, you show your husband the fanfics and ai bots of himself

TW: fluff, implied suggestive at the end, MDNI just in case, very poor writing, basic plot, english is not my first language

Characters: Pro player!Itoshi Rin x fem!reader

It was no secret that your husband, THE Itoshi Rin loves to spoil you, considering that you are his wife, but sometimes you like to think that your privellages might have been too much. Especially since you used your phone that he bought you for some really weird reasons.

Currently, you were just watching edits of your husband. It was really obnoxious that most of the sounds were phonk edits, but you didn't really care. Who wouldn't want to see their husband's pretty face anyway?

However, there was one thing that was nagging your brain for the past few hours. You couldn't really check by then, since you were doing chores but now seemed like the perfect time to check.

You went on to google and searched up ao3, a devious idea coming to mind. Searching the two words 'Itoshi' and then 'Rin' caused you to get so many pages in his tag. So many works in his name as you began to scroll. You went past the smut, too embarrassed to even click on them and looked at the tags of the others.

"Hiori Yo/Itoshi Rin, Isagi Yoichi/Itoshi Rin, even Shidou Ryusei/Itoshi Rin! Gosh, how many fanfics are there? There's even x reader fanfics!" You laughed to yourself. It was really funny reading all the fics. Most of them were created when you and Rin were in the dating stage, when fans believed that their delusions were true and that you and Rin had a chance to break up. Now there's barely any of those, just a few fanfics of you and Rin, which you adored (you didn't read the few smut fics in your tag).

You thought of more ways to annoy him, all ideas slipping out as you groaned in frustration.

'What about the ai bots?' You thought. You quickly went out of the website, frantically typing character.ai with a few typos and misspellings. Signing in to the website, you again wrote your husband's name. Hundreds, if not thousands of bots came out as your mouth came wide open. You giggled to yourself. Clicking on a random bot, you thought of his reaction to these when he comes back home.

Rin hated having to work with his 'teammates'.

The entire day, everyone was just running around, not doing anything and just being lukewarm bastards (or so he thinks). Right now, he was driving, just eager to meet you back home (he was never going to admit that). He was going to be mad if you weren't available.

He arrived at his destination, parking the car in his garage. Getting out of the car, he immediately walked to the front door, too tired of everything and everyone. He rang the bell as you quickly went to open the door. His gaze softened at seeing you, kissing your forehead as you welcomed him.

It was a very basic evening, there was only a bit of talking and you two ate dinner at that time. After dinner was a horror movie watching time, which was just you clutching onto him at all the scary parts. He didn't really mind, it was just a little difficult to focus.

Two hours of a horror movie later you and Rin were both in bed. You got into your pajamas while he was already in bed with his boxers. You hadn't forgotten about the things online in one bit. Taking your phone, you got into bed with him.

"Rinnie, can I show you something?" You said, getting closer to him, clutching your phone in hand and trying your best to not burst into laughter.

He subtly nodded, his attention all on you now. You went to your character ai tab, searching his name as he narrowed his eyes in suspicion.

"What are you doing?" He asked, very skeptical. You just smiled, pressing the search button and revealing all the bots on one page. You started to click on some of them, reading the messages out loud. You didnt really see his face, too busy just embarrassing him with the ai. Although, it was quite easy to tell that his face was red, considering that he was awfully quiet and was trying to take away your phone.

"Oh and there's more!" You said enthusiastically, already hearing his groan from embarrassment.

"Please stop," he begged. It's the first time he did in your relationship as a married couple, causing you to be a bit shocked, but you still didn't give in. In fact, it gave you more motivation to go further.

"Nope!" You said with a smile. "Look! There's so many of you and Isagi!" Now you could practically feel the anger radiating out of him. You knew that you were walking on thin ice, but it was very unlikely that anything was going to happen.

"There's also a few of you and me-" before you could finish that sentence, he took your phone away. He got off from the bed and stood up as you went after him, jumping at your phone as you couldn't reach. He clicked at one fanfic as he skimmed through the entire one shot. You didn't know that he clicked on a smut.

His ears turned red as he read that explicit fic while you were still reaching for your phone. He left your phone on your bedside table after finishing it. You immediately went to get it but he grabbed your waist and gently put you on the bed. He got your phone again and opened it to show the tab that he was reading from.

"Is this what you read that often?" He sounded disappointed. You couldn't even focus by the second paragraph, eyes diverting anywhere but the bright screen.

"No! I just did this to annoy you, I don't actually read it!" You frantically explained, not wanting him to get the wrong idea. Some part of you realized that you were fucked, big time. But the other part was still hoping that there was still a way out of your predicament.

He hummed, tossing the phone away.

"If that's the case, then I'm sure that it won't be a problem that I take some 'pointers' from this on you right?" He held your chin gently, forcing you to look at him as you gulped.

Shit

You truly fucked up badly.

Idk where I got this motivation from

[chosoguapo]

𝒥𝒥𝒦 𝑀𝐸𝒩 𝒲𝐼𝒯𝐻 𝒮𝒜𝒩𝑅𝐼𝒪 𝒢𝐼𝑅𝐿𝐹𝑅𝐼𝐸𝒩𝒟𝒮 x black fems! ⤷ content: just a lot of fluff really and some suggestive stuff but nothing descriptive. itadori & megumi are aged up to 18 (to seem more exclusive since i think you can imagine them like this at anytime), but it’s all for fluff reasons. Merry Christmas ❤️💚🤍

signed mumu . . . just fun hdcs with our favorite jjk men, some suggestive content, but nothing overly descriptive. any kind of support is appreciated buns <3 @hoori @ifuckslasherz @scarfac3 @sukuette @pekejs @yeagersex | banner credit to @cafekitsune

itadori with a hello kitty girlfriend

❤︎ we saw this coming, what can i say two main characters belong together. you both enjoy being out all the time, whether that’s just spending time with each or friends. just being out and about with each other.

❤︎ a lot of times people like to think itadori doesn’t have a girlfriend when he mentions he does have one. the way he goes on and on to brag about you to his closest friends. you’d think you’re some fictional character from a game, but no you are his and only his!

megumi with a pochacco girlfriend

❤︎ there is never a dull moment between the two of you. as you both can make the smallest things into a competition between each other. let anyone simply ask “who’s better at ___?” you both are jumping at the opportunity to beat the others ass.

❤︎ the way you two ended up together is a mystery to yourself, but also so funny. your brother was a delinquent that often got into arguments with other students. just this one time he decided to bother megumi which didn’t end well for him. of course you went to go stand up for your brother and cuss out the jackass you put his hands on your family. but let’s just say…. you got completely distracted and ended up bonding with the guy? you overheard him talking about one of your favorite special interests and couldn’t help but join in. it’s rare that you find someone else who deeply loves something like you.

nanami with a melody girlfriend

❤︎ nanami with his melody girlfriend are such a odd but complimenting couple. the both of you have an understanding, you love being the “traditional girlfriend” while he loves being a “traditional boyfriend.” basically he provides for you while you spend his money on all your precious desires (he prefers it this way).

❤︎ often you find yourself on top of nanami almost every night. often you find yourself having silly little nightmares from recent horror movies you’ve watched, but nanami is always there to comfort you. he hovers over, without letting you feel any of his weight. “here take melody” he tucks her into you and kiss you on the head before cuddling up with you.

geto with batz a maru girlfriend

❤︎ oh boy! two people who look like absolute meanies but care so deeply for the ones who know them best. relationship consists of you two constantly picking on each other or just plain embarrassing the other.

❤︎ geto’s most fondest memory with you is when you both first met for a blind date. it was at a bar that is now only but a block away from where you both call home. he remembers you getting so drunk that you couldn’t even properly write your signature that night. geto had never seen someone show how genuine they are with their real personality, jokes, and being loud as hell. he loved that you didn’t feel the need to hide yourself for others benefit.

gojo with a cinnamoroll girlfriend

❤︎ you know how everyone loves the girlfriend that speaks for their boyfriend when the waiter gets his food wrong? well that’s the dynamic you and gojo have, but he’s the one who speaks up for you.

❤︎ sometimes you find that a lot of your cinnamoroll plushies are missing and that because of no one other than you boyfriend. gojo enjoys taking them and putting them in his office to dress them up as a mini version of him. “doesn’t he look way better with my shades on” he proudly displays cinnamoroll with a mini version of the outfit he has on.

sukuna with a kuromi girlfriend

❤︎ naturally sukuna would gravitate towards a kuromi girl. someone that’s just as rebellious and mischievous as him, but also girly at the same time.

❤︎ sukuna loves getting reactions out of you. something like hiding your favorite plushie. can get you so heated and he loves seeing that side of you come out. when you come to him to ask where he placed it, he always pretends he has no clue as to what you’re chatting about. “oh, you’re talking about that black and purple plushies of yours right?” “yes!” “ i don’t recall ever seeing it love” he says with a wink.

choso with a mocha girlfriend

❤︎ you two are the perfect example of a pink aesthetic girlfriend with a black aesthetic boyfriend. do people constantly question you both being together because of your different aesthetics? yes, but doesn’t choso give them a death stare for it? absolutely yes!

❤︎ choso is too shy to admit it to you but he loves cuddling you or just being able to touch you in anyway you allow him to. he prefers to sleep in your room filled up to the brim with pink and he cherishes every second of it.

toji with a choco cat girlfriend

❤︎ a mischievous and carrying boyfriend with the laid back girlfriend that’s friendly. dare i say that how toji acts with you is like a golden retriever but in a black cat form. he’s does all the carrying and doting things regular boyfriends do, but he always had to remind you who he is at heart. which is a childish man with a fat cock!

❤︎ toji knows how self-conscious you get when going to the gym. not because of the curves you possess, but because you feel like you’re doing the workouts completely wrong. which is why he always has to be your hype man at the gym. while your taking pictures for your social media hes right behind you slapping your ass. “beautiful just beautiful” he says as he slaps your ass again and leaving a kiss on your cheek.

[kiirotoao]

Will the most beloved headcanons part 3: Byler edition! (AKA Mike being a simp headcanons)

Mike doesn’t like people touching his face. Like he’ll nope away from someone just trying to poke his cheek. But with Will? Complete opposite. Will can pinch his cheeks, trace his jaw, feel his forehead for fever - anything and everything

Same goes for hair touching, too. Nobody gets to play with his hair but Will

Mike is particular about his D&D character design and he only accepts changes or suggestions from Will

Mike likes to trade Halloween candy with Will and Will only (because Dustin, Lucas, Max, and El are quite judicial about trading candy lmao)

Mike sits still for nothing except when Will is painting him

When Mike gets his driver’s license, Will is his passenger princess for life and no one else can even dare to dream of taking shotgun

Similarly, when it’s raining, only Will gets to share umbrella space with him (like, come on, Dustin and Lucas can just deal with it)

Will is Mike’s dedicated beta reader for his novels

On that note, Will is the only other soul who’s seen all of Mike’s self-proclaimed embarrassing short stories and Star Wars fanfics

Also on that note, Mike only writes poetry for Will (duh)

Mike hates carrying big heavy things but when he and Will move into their place together, you better believe he did all the heavy lifting and made sure that Will didn’t to avoid Will getting hurt (even at the expense of himself, rip)

Okay so I headcanon that both Mike and Will are afraid of stray bugs in the house, but Mike will step up and kill or evacuate bugs for Will anyway

Mike thinks that sitting on someone’s lap? Someone sitting on his lap? Way too much body heat, way too close for comfort, get off me, dude. But he and Will splay over each other all the time because it’s Will, and Will is cozy :)

Similarly, doing footsies is so stupid. But with Will it’s adorable and Mike’s a giggly mess

Random but Mike only likes how Will makes eggs out of everyone in the Party (and he won’t eat it if it’s not Will’s lmao)

Now, Mike does readily lend things - paper, pencils, erasers - to other people in class, but he’s not too keen on it. But if Will needs something? He’s giving it with a bona fide smile

Mike also sometimes doesn’t like lending his time for that matter. Trying to help people with homework is exhausting, especially after being a tutor for Holly sometimes but if Will’s struggling with some homework Mike may as well have his doctorate in education

Mike thinks that it’s funny if someone has food on their face and he might not mention it but for Will he’ll go out of his way to remove it

Over the years of being together, Will has learned to beware mentioning that he likes or wants something, because Mike is buying/obtaining it plus a million different versions and styles

Mike doesn’t like singing or playing guitar in front of anyone but he’ll make an exception…

[crookedkryptonitebeliever]

Tw afab reader, cyprus being horny, reader being cringe on main

Despite Cyprus preferring his girlfriend to be a girly, airheaded bimbo, he's also fascinated by those who are naturally awkward and geeky. The epitome of cringe and would speak in tongues only the chronically online would understand.

Maybe your tactic to ward him off was to be as painfully self-depreciating or embarrassing. You could break out into dances that are popular in some online shooting game in public; he would of course urge you to stop appearing so deviant, even dragging you away by the forearm if you don't stop.

However, you're only endearing yourself to him even more, Cyprus does encourage you to express your interest in the privacy of his apartment, because it's amusing. As long as you're not overly consumed by the internet.

He wouldn't always understand what you're always saying. For example, you would always exclaim that phrase whenever he says he has to use the bathroom. Cyprus wouldn't get why you would go crazy over a few lines in random places, you could be showing him the source material, but he doesn't understand the humor in it.

You could yap about the unending lore of some game that he thinks may be too scary for its intended audience. He would be totally clueless but the way you retell it is so funny, so adorable and enthusiastic, that Cyprus could sit and listen to you talk for hours. But there is always a limit, you would know that you reached it when he began making out with you mid-sentence.

It's your enthusiasm that he's attracted to, it's cute that you're so excited over something so esoteric.

To your surprise, you could purposely make your cosplay costumes or choices as atrocious as possible, thinking he would scrunch his nose in disgust and not want to do anything with you. But it's the opposite. He would burst out into laughter, at first laughing at you, but eventually it turned into admiration for your effort. Cyprus wouldn't help you with your makeup or costume unless you asked, he would be equally as fucked up anyways. So the quality of it wouldn't change too much.

To your surprise, he would get two tickets to the cosplay convention. He would just put on his leather jacket and fingerless gloves, claiming he's cosplaying whatever character closest in appearance despite not having any knowledge of the media. You would be in your own costume, having a blast.

It goes without saying, he will keep an eye out for you. He's oddly much less protective and possessive in conventions (perhaps it's because he believes that the majority is here to only partake in their interests of the arts, no one would want their work to be ruined. And maybe he thinks that your cosplay is weird enough to ward off rivals.) , he allows you to act as "cringey" as you like, but within reason. Because he thinks you're just acting in accordance to the norm there. He wouldn't let you get kicked out.

Cyprus isn't necessarily camera shy. He was an actor and model for a handful of retail commercials, he would still work as one if they pay him enough. He doesn't mind appearing in videos or pictures with you, but don't expect him to learn your little dances.

He would gladly be the cameraman, though. It doesn't take a genius to guess that he's internally dying from second-hand embarrassment through his crumpled face as he watches you act like an animatronic in slow motion.

No pointers, no suggestions on how to make it better, Cyprus lets you be in your element no matter how cringe. He loves it even if it kills him to watch you make a fool out of yourself. It's because he just loves seeing you shine and away from that damn phone for once. You're doing something productive and fulfilling, and that's extremely heart fluttering to Cyprus.

He would definitely tease you, lovingly. But only he gets to do it, no one else. Cyprus barks heavy threats and insults straight to the faces of those who bullies and makes fun of you for your special interests, sometimes it would even get physical if they go too far and actually hurt your feelings. For every tear you shed, your hater will receive a broken bone.

Okay. That did not work, it only made him more attracted to you. At least you had fun.

So now you tried to bore him away, he's generally impatient. Hot headed and needs a lot of stimulation day-to-day. He would definitely want to rip his skin off when you suggest completing a 5000 piece puzzle, right?

Yes, he will groan. He will complain and he will whine. Pawing at you to do something else, your silly dances, your funny cosplaying, to get out of the apartment, to have sex- anything other than this! It's so boring for him.

The first few days, he would just be next to you, trying to convince you to get a new hobby where it doesn't involve boredom. Forcefully dragging you out of the apartment to go on adventures, but you would always go back to completing your puzzles whenever you get the chance.

He would distract you by leaving hickeys on your neck, curling his tongue in your mouth and if you're already at that stage, eating you out like a hungry man. Drinking every drop of your nectar.

Once he realizes that he could give you cunnilingus daily, he's suddenly okay with your "very boring" hobby. But you wouldn't be, so you stopped trying to complete it. This would make him frown, because it always displeases him to have you lose interest in something.

So he very begrudgingly agreed to stop latching his mouth onto your pussy and join you in your quest of completing the picture.

The first few hours would consist of him giving up every five minutes because he couldn't find the next corner piece. He would slide his hands down your underwear and touch you until you cum.

However, if you persevere, Cyprus will eventually find himself enjoying the hobby too. Finding that it's therapeutic and almost hypnotic in a way. But only if you sit on his lap and allow him to bury his cock deep inside you.

Unfortunately, you wouldn't be able to concentrate with his large, hard member slowly but surely stirring your guts for hours. Each time he picks up a piece, his aroused dick would twitch and send shocks into your mushed brain. Or when he gets mildly frustrated, he would bounce you on him until you orgasm- that would reset his patience and keep him going. He stops working on the puzzle for the day when he ejaculates, which would take anywhere between thirty minutes to half a day.

In the end, Cyprus would be the one who finished the puzzle while you're mostly too busy trying not to pass out from cumming too much.

Cyprus would be so proud of himself for doing it, even buying a frame and displaying it in his mostly barren living room.

He would be baffled when you reacted negatively when Cyprus brings back another 5000 piece puzzle for you and him to complete.

To him, you're so predictable and unpredictable at the same time. Your hobbies and interests could change just like that and without warning. But regardless, he loves you even more now since you somehow made something so "soul crushingly boring" like puzzles, into something super fun.

Your attempts to make Cyprus sick of you have failed, but at least you knew that he was supportive in his own special way no matter how much he disliked it in the beginning.

[mercurytojupiter]

chapter two - the labyrinth

a/n: ariadne is so funny to me like theres nothing like pure deflection to make me giggle!!

warnings: farleigh being farleigh, which includes mentions of underage sex, drugs, drinking, cigarettes and sex 18+

fic summary: ariadne gavin and her childhood best friend turned enemy return to saltburn for the last time

Ariadne lounges on the loveseat in Farleigh's room while he lies on the floor just below her. She had missed this. The feeling of just existing in a space with him with no obligation to speak or even interact. Sharing the room was more than enough.

Farleigh sits up from his position, head now just beside her knee. "So, did you get pissed 'cause you heard I was fucking Vaillancourt?"

"Mm," Ariadne mutters, neither a confirmation nor a denial.

"Were you," Farleigh swings onto the couch beside her, his long limbs splaying in every direction. "jealous?"

Ariadne coughs. "Well. No, I wouldn't say jealous."

It wasn't. Not because jealous isn't an apt word, but it isn't a good enough descriptor of the depth of betrayal and envy she had felt. She didn't think such a word even existed.

"If I ask Vee, will she tell me the same thing?" Farleigh mumbles.

Ariadne curses in her head. "I walked in on you two. You were the only person in the entire country I trusted and you were having sex with her instead of-"

"With you?" Farleigh asks suggestively.

"Instead of taking care of me like I took care of you. I moved to England to help you progress and you just threw yourself at every breathing human in a five-mile radius. I literally couldn't keep a hold on you."

Farleigh sighs. "You were so independent, Ari. You knew exactly who you were and what you wanted and I felt a little behind the curve. I didn't want to hold you back."

"Well, you were all I had to depend on, so, of course, I was independent," Ariadne grumbles.

Farleigh throws an arm around her shoulder. "I should have been there for you, Ari."

"And I shouldn't have tried to run away from you. Friends?" She concedes.

"Best." He agrees. "Now, the fuck are you reading?"

"Game of Thrones. It's like fantasy political science." She explains excitedly, launching into a rant about the complex characters she had recently found herself enveloped in.

She is so deep in her explanation that she doesn't notice how Farleigh's eyes follow her movements, warm and wanting.

Ariadne continues, undeterred. "And Sansa, she's the eldest daughter, she-"

"I missed you," Farleigh says in the middle of her speech.

Ariadne rolls her eyes, "Yeah, whatever Farleigh. We're friends again, but you seemed perfectly content where you were."

And that was the part that made Ariadne embarrassed. Farleigh was comfortable everywhere, and yet somehow, someway, even when they had spent seven years unable to get along, all of her friends were just his friends, or his cousin's, or his cousin's friends.

Ariadne felt like a human leech sometimes when she remembered how Farleigh had gifted her the life she had now.

Farleigh shakes his head, laughing, and lights a blunt. "Well, I guess I'm glad it looked that way."

Ariadne pulls it from his lips, ignoring the soft whine of complaint that emits from his lips while she does so. "You do not get to be the only one high for this conversation. And anyway, what, you weren't comfortable?"

Farleigh gives a little puff of air. "I wasn't ever comfortable without you. You were like, the only person that got my jokes and didn't think I was an asshole."

"Yeah, until you were," Ariadne mentions, breathing the smoke into his face.

"Fair enough," he laughs, and what a beautiful, light sound it is, that laugh. The way his body seems to rock with it, curling and stretching his long limbs to accept the noise.

She really, really wants to kiss him, and so she steels herself by looking away with a snort. "D'ya wanna watch a movie?"

Farleigh shrugs. "High? With you? Fuck let's see it."

Ariadne strolls back to her room, Farleigh hot on her heels, and digs into her suitcase.

"I know it's in here somewhere," she mutters frustratedly.

Farleigh turns on the TV, boots up the DVD player, and has Duncan bring them food for the munchies all before, "I fucking found it!"

Farleigh gives her a look of disbelief. "Pride and Prejudice the film?"

"Well you know I love the book, and this one has Keira Knightley in it!"

"I know, I saw the trailers, just-" he sputters. "Pride and Prejudice? It's kind of a chick flick, Ari." He rolls his eyes but smiles as he positions himself on her bed. He looks so comfortable there which makes her heart stop for just a moment before continuing.

"And? I'm a chick!" Ariadne defends, popping the DVD in.

Ariadne curls onto the bed, Farleigh beside her, as they pass the blunt between the two of them. She feels like she's atop a cloud, Farleigh's long arms wrapped tightly around her as he mumbles into her curly hair about the movie.

Ariadne was never very talkative when high. She was sort of glazed over, simply easing into the air around her, and, as a result, easing into Farleigh's body.

"Hold on, is he being serious? I never actually read the book, it was sorta your thing." Farleigh looks down at her inquisitively. He was so touchy. She didn't dislike it, of course, but she didn't like it either, if only because it was hard to focus on the intimate workings of Lizzie and Darcy when every inch of exposed skin that he touched was on fire.

"Really? Now you have to. I'll give you my copy." Ariadne hums without thinking.

Farleigh nods. "I will take you up on that."

He falls asleep, and she shakes him awake for the Missus Darcy line.

"That's so unrealistic." Farleigh groans.

Ariadne rolls her eyes. "Oh, I'm sorry, I didn't know you had such extensive experience with living in the Regency era."

"Well," Farleigh says, "I may not be exactly from the eighteen-hundreds, but Saltburn is close enough, and that would never happen."

"Why?" Ariadne asks instinctively.

Farleigh holds her face in his hands, and she suddenly recollects how large they are when his pointer and index finger dig into her hair whilst the heel of his palm rests on her jaw. "Because, my innocent little princess, no rich person can truly be happy."

Ariadne shakes her head. "No."

"No?" Farleigh repeats her, a wide grin across his lips.

"I'm going to be happy one day, and I'm going to be in love with someone who loves me back, I got a tattoo about it. England is not the whole world, and it is definitely not my whole world," She argues, exhaling so close to his face she can see the tiny pores and ridges in his nose.

Farleigh smiles fondly and releases her face, wrapping one arm back around her. "Good luck with that, Ari. Good fucking luck."

She huffs but lets him snuggle his head into the crook of her neck.

She doesn't even notice that when he leaves to get ready for dinner - about halfway through Ten Things I Hate About You - he takes the copy of Pride and Prejudice off of her desk, and she certainly doesn't remember that the copy on her desk has almost a decade's worth of annotations and notes, many of them openly stating Farleigh's name.

For dinner that night, she wears a strappy red dress and Farleigh snorts while zipping it up. "What?" She asks, whipping around to face him.

Farleigh places his hands on her shoulders gently. "It's nothing, you just look like your mom, ya know? When we would go to those fancy cocktail parties with our parents?"

He turns her around by the shoulders to look in the mirror again, and shockingly, she finds that he's right. The straps, the thigh slit, and the bold red lip all scream Vienna Gavin's Daughter.

She also finds that she and Farleigh look good together. He's standing behind her in the mirror and for a moment she sees what she imagines other people could see in them. An intimidating, beautiful couple that could dismiss someone they disliked in an instant.

"We look like Mr. and Mrs. Smith from that Brad Pitt movie." Farleigh stage-whispers in her ear.

"We could be beautiful spies if you were a little stronger." Ariadne smiles at Farleigh through the mirror.

"I exercise!" Farleigh explains, pouting his beautiful lips at her. "I like to go for runs."

"You like to run your mouth, that's for sure," Ariadne mutters.

She turns and looks him over. Something feels off to her. "Go grab a necktie, I don't like the bowtie look, I feel like you belong in the House of Lords."

Dinner is still her least favourite part of staying at Saltburn. It is the most monotonous part of their day, sitting together and pretending like this is who they are.

Oliver stares at Felix like he hung the damn moon, and after a point, it stops being funny and becomes concerning. When dinner ends and they're all headed back to their rooms, Ariadne grabs Felix's sleeve. "Fi, can I talk to you for a second?"

Felix gives her a strange look but falls to the side with her. "What's up, pet?"

"Oliver." She says simply, waiting to see how his face changes.

Felix rubs his temple. "God, not you too."

Ariadne grabs his arm nervously, peeking over her shoulder to make sure Oliver is gone. "I just don't get the best energy off him, Fi."

Felix shakes his head. "Then what energy do you get from him, pet?"

Ariadne has a few choice words for the pit in her gut she's ascribed to Oliver Quick, least of all being that every word from his mouth sounds like a lie, but she has no evidence to the contrary. Weasel-y. Gold-digging. Evil. "Dangerous," she concludes, taking a deep breath.

"He's not dangerous, and even on the off-chance he is, I can handle it," Felix smiles quickly, but she can sense the unease just below it. Felix isn't stupid, and he isn't oblivious, but he dismisses things that don't fit his narrative, and Ariadne genuinely believes some part of him can feel that Oliver doesn't quite line up.

Ariadne sighs, holding his hands. "Felix, one day I'm not going to be here to protect you all the time, you know that, right?"

"C'mon, Ari, what're you on about? The Cattons are immortal," Felix jokes before pausing to turn stern. "Can't you just be nice, Ari? He's trying his best."

Felix at his most stern is about as intimidating to her as a puppy.

"Nice people get murdered." Ariadne deadpans. "One of us has to have our guard up. Besides, Farleigh said-"

Felix cuts her off, the defensive little bitch. "Since when are we putting so much stock into my cousin? I thought you hated each other."

Now that did hurt. She and Farleigh hadn't been kind to each other for the past seven years, but she never thought the Cattons would forget that they had originally been two-of-a-kind, and she definitely never thought they would think she hated him.

"Maybe we don't get along all the time anymore, but at least I know Farleigh. And the guy is a lot of things, shit-stirring asshole included, but he's not a liar. If you won't listen to me, at least listen to him." Ariadne gives him one more pleading look before turning to head back to her room.

[sleepysnk]

hi love! Would you be able to do some domestic relationship headcanons w draken pls? Thank you sm 😚😚

a/n: hey bae! i love me some draken headcanons, so thank you for sending this in!! i appreciate it! <3 i hope you enjoy these!! :)

characters: ken (draken) ryuguji

warnings: some suggestive content, fluff, established relationship, mentions of food, use of pet names (baby, princess), soft draken.

DOMESTIC RELATIONSHIP HEADCANONS.

ken (draken) ryuguji:

- i want to preface that this man is the absolute perfect person to marry. he has all of the great qualities and i think he would make an excellent husband!!

- this man would treat you so well. i see draken as a man who’s perfect for commitment, and he would be so faithful to you. he’s very much trying to settle down with you, so expect the best treatment. he’s not a hard husband to work with. he’s sweet, kind, communicative, etc! he’s pretty much all you would want in a person. i would hardly ever expect anything to go south in this relationship. he’s such a cutie, and he’s a great sweetheart.

- draken definitely makes you breakfast every morning. he’d be the type to kiss your forehead whenever he wakes up and he immediately goes into the kitchen to whip something up. he’ll make you anything you want. pancakes, waffles, eggs, you name it! it’s really good too. he’s like a total house husband when it comes to you.

- he spoils you rotten. draken loves to give you as much love as he possibly can. he’s such a physical touch kind of guy. he has to have a hand on you at every possible moment. his favorite place is the small of your back or your hips. he just adores those parts of you, but you as a whole is enough for him. he also does it as a way to show others that you’re his. he isn’t a crazy protective boyfriend, but he would prefer if others kept their eyes away from you.

- he LOVES when you shower with him. he lets you wash his hair and clean him up. it’s super cute and he does the same for you. if you have his back, he better have yours!

- not gonna lie, i see draken taking you out on his bike a lot. i know it can seem kinda scary, but this man would never put you in any danger. if anything, he thinks it’s kinda hot when you’re riding with him with your arms squeezing his torso. he likes to show you off that way, and it’s super fucking cute. he’s so fun to ride with to be honest. he also likes taking you on his bike whenever there’s a pretty sunset. his favorite thing is to watch them with you whenever you’re out for a ride.

- he loves to have little dates with you at home. i mention this a lot with the tokyo rev boys, but i just think it’s something they love doing. draken loves doing anything with you, and having a date at home would be one of them. he can cook. he will make a divine meal and you guys usually watch a movie or take a bath afterwards. usually, those two things lead to some nice action in bed later ;).

- lots of ‘i love yous’ are said randomly. he has no embarrassment telling you that he loves you on a daily basis. he always ends it with a little kiss too.

- “i love you, baby. i hope you know that.”

- cuddles! this goes along with the whole physical touch aspect, but he loves to cuddle you all the time. he’s able to relax when you’re safe in his arms at night. he loves being able to protect you <3.

- he totally lets you do his braid. sometimes if he’s bored, he’ll let his hair down and let you do whatever you want to it. it’s kinda funny whenever you throw it in weird styles or simply just brush your fingers through it. the braid is his favorite though, because he loves leaning his head between your thighs. even if you tell him to move forward, he fucking won’t. he’s addicted to those.

- “ken.. i can’t braid it like this.” “so what? let me chill here, princess.”

- overall, he’s a great boyfriend/husband. he craves domestic life more than you may think and you will be blessed with this man <3.

[crabonfire]

hi! i recently saw your one bed trope post and was wondering if you ever did a part 2? love your writing and remember to drink water!!

One bed trope, Part 2.

The long awaited continuation!!! I'm sorry I almost forgot I even wrote it and it's my most popular prompt haha!!

characters: Heavy, Engineer, Medic.

warnings: none

note!! PLEASE READ DJDJFJFJF:

SO...I didn't realise until I finished heavy's but this is really long...like,,, super duper long. So sniper and spy will be the last part!! I'm so sorry but WOW I write long one shots. don't worry, it'll be released right after this one.

Oh and ps, Engineer's is a bit suggestive. no nsfw but sexual tension here n there 🤯🤯🤯🤯

♡Heavy♡

• "I will take the floor, Y/N sleep on the bed."

• THE SECOND HE SEES THERES ONLY ONE BED HE JUST...YEAH

• "Heavy no, its uncomfortable. Its been a long day, I'll take the floor."

"No. Heavy insist."

"Heavy."

"Y/N."

You two debated for a bit until you just told him your sharing.

"How? Heavy...is big."

"It'll fit, don't worry."

"...This is not good idea."

"Shut up man. Either we both suffer on the ground or have the bed together."

• after you both shower, Heavy spends some time to clean Sasha, while your already incredibly worn out from the day.

"I think I'm gonna sleep now, night heavy."

"goodnight Y/N, sweet dreams."

"Mhm, and if I find you asleep on the floor in the morning I'm going to break your jaw."

"Haha, very funny Y/N."

"I will."

"Ah...alright."

• you doze off quickly, Heavy finishes cleaning sasha and seeing he has nothing else to do he decides to sleep too.

• He's quite careful, making sure that he doesn't wake you. When he does lie, the bed tilts his way. His eyes widen a bit by the creak it creates as he would hate to wake you up, but is relieved to see your knocked out cold.

He studies your sleeping form for a bit, he's not weirded out by sleeping with another person. He's had to sleep with the mercs sometimes, and he used to sleep with his sisters when he was young, so this was nothing really.

But, why is it you make him so nervous? Especially in this situation? Your not even awake, but that makes it worse.

• He slowly slips into the covers that barely cover him, but right now he's more focused on you. When he does, the bed slightly tips to him and you shift closer to him, making him panic slightly. That panic fades away when you rest your head near his arm, forcing him to lay face flat to the ceiling.

His cheeks grow warm, so do his ears, and his entire face. Oh my god. Your resting on his shoulder. Oh my god. Oh my godddd.

You murmur something under your breath as you wrap your arms around his, making him tense up. "Mmmfh..." Your voice is muffled as you hold his arm. He melts, a weak smile appearing on his face as he holds the urge to freak out. Smiling contently, he soon falls to a slumber.

aw,,, anyways morning!!!

• You wake up and broooo...

Your confused by the immense warmth your feeling right now, when you open your eyes your eyes widen and your cheeks flush immediately. Heavy is holding you right now,, the heavy. The guy who carries around a machine gun everyday and kills people who even bat an eye to him, the guy who hunts BEARS.

But... You know him. He's a nice guy. Which makes it WORSE!!! HE'S... HE'S HOLDING YOU RIGHT NOW OH MY GKDDDNDNDJFJFJFJFJRJDJ! #(#((£_(

You don't know what to do. You... Uh... Um... Hm.

• "Oh my god-" you mumble, feeling embarrassed yet also feeling super lucky right now. your but bear man crush is holding you rn. bro.

He shifts, making you panic. Your eyes shut in instinct , and he seemed to have been woken up. You can't see right now but his eyes are WIIIDEEEEEEE he's wide awake rn haha

• "bozhe moi-" he grunts.

"... Y/N..?"

"...yea?"

"Oh-dear god I am quite sorry..." He let's you go and he sits up.

"It's okay! It was uh... Warm. It was nice."

it's quiet for a bit. He's obviously tense.

"...I liked it."

He flinches a bit, turning to you. "I am glad I didn't make you uncomfortable...i also liked it."

His cheeks are red. Oh?

Oh...

OH

He likes you like that...SCORE!!! WOOO!!! LET'S GOOOOOOOOOOO!!!! HE LIKES YOU BACK WOOOOOOO!!!!

you crack up a smile, making him feel a bit flustered. He gets up and excuses himself to shower, while your having a mini celebration over the fact that THAT little tint of red on his face is an obvious hint that he likes you. Let's goooooo!!!!!!

♡Engie♡

• he knew there would be one bed. he's close with ms pauling and knows the details of any sudden changes. so he knew, and he took this as am opportunity to make a move on you.

• "Engie there's uh...one bed."

"What? Oh-darn'...really? no way..."

"Oh um...I'll sleep on the floor."

"No-no. I'll sleep on the floor."

"Engie that's ridiculous, you've worked your ass off today I am not letting you sleep on the floor."

"Don't cut yourself short sweet pea, you were a real sharpshooter today, you take the bed."

"...ugh! Let's just-share the bed."

"...ah, alright." SUCCESSSSSSSS

• he has a whole plan too. small talk until you both get tired, he acts all chill about it, casually gets close to you without making you uncomfortable, andddd when you scooch closer to him he'll be all suave.

if you think this is out of this is out of character, considering he's an engineer with 11 phds who cut off his own hand to replace it with a gunslinger, and is nice but makes TELEPORTERS...he's definitely a carefully calculated man, even in these situations.

• you two talk for a bit, rambling about the day and laughing over stupid encounters. the clock strikes midnight, and you both realise its time to rest.

But your quite nervous with him, feeling the heat to your cheeks as you sit next to him. "You okay sugar?" He asks, worry in his voice. "Y-Yeah! Sorry, just uh...um...yea." You sputter out. "Are you nervous?" He asks.

AHAHDHDHFH he really has to ask?? "That obvious huh?" You chuckle nervously, making him smile softly. "It's alright, I won't bite. I mean, unless you want me to."

• Your head turns to him, noticing the gaze he's had on you. Your face feels hot, and your at a loss on what to say. He laughs, "I'm just jokin' darl'." Your mouth opens but you can't seem to say anything. He just... Stares.

"Oh my god your a fuckin tease." You look away, laughing. Wow okay. He...hes flirting. Well now you know he likes you like that. "Oh but you like it don't you?"

That made you turn your attention back to him, brows furrowed. He places a hand on your chin, making you look up at him. If he couldn't see the blush on your face, the heat from it would certainly be obvious. "Don't you?"

Your knees are weak, your head is dizzy, you don't know how to react, you feel like your gonna explode. He waits for a moment, and he starts to laugh, taking his hand away from your chin and shaking his head.

"Nevermind, get some sleep." He gives you one last cocky smile, and then walks off to the bathroom. Your left there speechless, not having anything to say or even think about. What is there to think about?? You can't even process what just happened to you.

I mean it's nice to know that he obviously likes you back but wow...you were not expecting him to be so...forward.

You shake your thoughts away and dim the lights, slipping into your comfortable sheets and trying your best to just...think about it tomorrow.

wow. um. morning.

• goddamnit.

• of fucking course you're gonna wake up in his arms. right after he teases you relentlessly of fucking COURSE you're gonna wake up in his arms.

your wrapped tightly in his warm embrace, he's knocked the fuck out, snoring lightly. you sigh, trying to escape but he's so damn strong what the hell...

you recall the events that happened last night, and damn!! this bitch is a tease.

you frown but accept your fate, letting yourself fall back to sleep. this man sleeps like a fucking rock. not even a nuclear alarm will wake his ass up.

♡Medic♡

• honestly?? I think he'd be too tired to even like complain or do anything.

• "Oh-uh...medic there's one bed."

"Oh? I did not expect us having to share, but alright then!"

"O-Oh? Are you sure? I don't mind sleeping on the floor."

"Nonsense! Neither of us need to wake up with a sore back tomorrow, it's alright."

• he sets up his documents on a table near the TV, and spends the whole night writing and going over files on a previous experiment he did.

you just sorta do your own thing, making small talk here and there, though he's obviously more focused in his work. You leave him be, but after hours, he's still just on thay damn desk.

"Hey doc-sorry to bother but uh...you gonna sleep soon? It's pretty late."

"Hm? Oh! Yes yes of course, I had forgotten how fast time goes while I do my work. Thank you for reminding me, I'll sleep in a bit no need to worry."

"Ah..okay then. Goodnight medic."

He hums in reply, then going back to writing. You shrug it off, taking a sip of water and slipping right to sleep.

• An hour goes by, and finally he decides to rest. He closes his documents and dims the lights, walking over to the bed. As he sits, he's quite enamoured by your sleeping self. He smiles, you look so calm.

He knows he likes you. Your the only patient he's loves to take care of, no matter what disgusting or horrible thing it is, he absolutely will do anything in his power to help you. The way you check up on him when it's late at night, the way you help him clean up and record experiments having full trust in his ability to heal you, and the way you make his heart skip faster than normal.

Now that he's alone with you, he feels a bit nervous. It's really starting to kick in now that this is the first time he's gonna be sleeping with you. NOT IN A WEIRD WAY, but wow, it's finally kicking in that you're sleeping together.

He feels like a school girl, it's silly. But he can't help it, how did you manage to steal his heart? He's stolen many himself, but this feels so unreal. He snaps back to reality when he realises he needs to sleep, smiling, he slips into the covers and faces you. "Goodnight, Y/N." He mutters.

awwwwwwwwwww he's so silly!!! morning time everyone

• He wakes up pretty early, he doesn't need much sleep to operate in the morning. He's surprised by the warmth he feels on his face, but starts to smile when he realises that your holding him in your sleep.

that's so sweet, Y/N oh my god.

he melts into you, wrapping his arms tight around your figure. "Mmmh..medic..?" you mumble in response to the sudden gesture. "Yes?"

You look down, blink a bit, and take in the scene.

It's medic. He's smiling wearily, his arms are around you, and yours around him.

woah.

• "Oh-oh gosh-"

You scooch away from him and sit up, and so does he, putting his glasses on. "I am so so sorry... I hope I didn't make you uncomfortable-oh god." You sputter, chuckling nervously.

"It is alright! I enjoyed it."

"Oh...you did?"

"Yes. You were quite warm. I found it cute!"

No point in being shy now, he's quite an honest guy you know? You can feel your cheeks redden, chuckling even more at his blunt self.

"Wow uh...Well. I'm glad you did...It was nice actually."

• You both just kinda smile like two idiots, then in perfect timing, Ms Pauling knocks on the door to wake you guys up. You two get ready and for the rest of the day, the both of you are giggling and flirting like two dumb teenagers just falling in love. It's adorable.

And for the week where you two are together, it always ends up like this. You two holding each other when you wake up. You both like each other, it's obvious now. But just who will ask out the other first?

BOOM cliffhanger HAHAHAHAHHAAAAAA!!!!!!!! Cry.

Anyways part 3 with sniper and Spy tomorrow!!! IM SORRY LMAOOOO this was longer than I thought and my palms are sweaty from writing. Like...actually I really need to stop they are incredibly sweaty.

Hope you enjoyed! For any spelling errors I apologise, stay tuned for part three tomorrow!! It'll be the first thing I post :) reblogs are greatly appreciated ♡

[askauradonprep]

Rise of Red Liveblog Part 1

Just for the record, I'd like to point out there was a Queen of Hearts logo with the kids celebrating coming off the Isle in D3. I saw it not 10 minutes ago. So. :P

30 years is about right, yeah (it's actually 32 but eh)

What distant lands??????????

Also - Beast was elected king. I can see the Isle being part of a winning platform but that's not quite the same thing as this movie suggests.

OH YAY, Uma did sail around a little before she came back! I'm gonna have an updated crew timeline after this.

Huh, is it me or does Auradon look less bright and cheery? I don't mind that necessarily but I kinda wonder if that's meant to imply what's happened since the villains came back. I don't THINK so because that seems pretty 'off message' for this franchise but still.

I kinda like Fairy Godmother's office. It reminds me of a starry sky.

Oh my GOD Uma is literally lounging with her feet up and just has to yell 'pirates' for some of her crew to come do everything for her. LOST REVENGE CREW LET UMA DO SOME THINGS BY HERSELF CHALLENGE

I thought for a second the pirate I have deemed Juno was someone new (only saw her from the back) and the way my eye TWITCHED. I was about to cuss out my favourite character at 1 in the morning.

Fairy Godmother being a nerd who colour codes things should surprise NO ONE.

One reason I actually don't hate Beast, Belle and Fairy Godmother as much as some in this fandom is because even though they knee jerk shoot some things down, they can also take a deep breath and hear people out.

I've ranted enough about Wonderland not joining Auradon before, I don't like it, moving along.

Yeah, okay, I didn't need my heart anyway. That Carlos mention punched me in the chest. Thank you Uma. I like how that's also what convinced FG to help. She loves the VKs so much and I am not hearing alternatives.

"Nobody bears to talk about it" - WE HAVE HEARD ABOUT IT BEFORE. WITH ALLY.

Uma still not standing for a VK being left behind. <3

I love the QOH still having her off with your heads tendency. Remind me to write about the Queen's Forest sometimes.

HELP I LOVE RED SO MUCH ALREADY

The helmets remind me a little of the wheelers from Return to Oz. That's not a bad thing.

Red reminds me of a more rebellious Aladdin.

"I'm a lost cause" Ow.

Even without evil, being the next in line to royalty is rough. Poor girl. It's never just about you when you're royal.

New HC - the Queen of Hearts (and Red) were originally on the Isle and then Maddox made his time machine and meddled.

Go figure she's got sticky fingers. Definitely a VK

I love Chloe already. <333 And her parents seem great <3

Chloe's parents' embarrassing her is so funny and so cute.

THE GLASS BOOTS

Yeah, I'm standing by my head canon - these two have absolutely zero idea how Chad behaves when they aren't there watching him and would be heartbroken to be told so nobody's had the nerve to tell them they raised a douchebag yet.

Wait. Chloe's going to be queen? That can't be right. Surely as the oldest, Chad would be next in line? Chloe must be younger than him. Okay, maybe they know Chad is a douchebag after all. Or maybe they want her to be queen by marriage of somewhere, that's also very possible. Or hey, maybe their traditions have female-preference primogeniture and Charming (and his dad) just didn't have any sisters. That's possible too. That's probably it.

Damn, Queen of Hearts IS ruthless. I'm digging it.

Red, that hat trick wasn't going to work. Poor girl. She so clearly doesn't want to hurt anyone.

Okay, the Queen of Hearts clearly knows Uma and 'another villain gone soft' - sounds like rehabbing ex-villains has gone pretty well.

Awwww, it is cute how excited Chad is for his dad to see him play. And now I stand by my head canon again of nobody wanting to admit to them that he is a jerk.

HA! The Queen of Hearts driving cracked me up.

Love Ain't It is the villain parent theme song. I want to give Red a HUG.

Cinderella, Chloe, you tried, but Red and the Queen of Hearts are not having it. Red, be nice to Chloe!

I'm kinda stanning the Queen of Hearts. I also really like Cinderella's explanation of why she's like this to Chloe.

Queen of Hearts actually seems hurt when Red doesn't want to be like her. She reminds me of Maleficent a little.

[egg-emperor]

Yess I really like Modern Egg x Classic Egg.😍😍😍 It fits perfectly with his narcissism. I mean what better mate for him could there be for him other than himself? Who else could match such a superior being?🥚👬🥚

yesss modern Egg x classic Egg is actually the real otp. it's a fact that there's nobody else Eggman could love like he loves himself. and it's the hottest because no other character is hotter, so doubled is perfect. Eggman would agree as he doesn't think anybody is as smart, handsome, or superior. nobody truly deserves or is worthy of him, he's out of everyone else's league except for himself XD

they were gay af with each other in the times they were getting along in Generations, they were just flirting so blatantly and stroking each other's egos as if that wasn't the only thing of each other's they wanted to stroke. because there's also each other's mustaches to stroke, obviously... and more. ;) they might as well have just started jerking each other off, that would've been less gay hfbskgnskgn

it is the most fitting, Eggman is so in love with himself to the point of total obsession and immense dedication in how he wants to give himself the world, literally! he calls himself handsome canonically and makes himself giddy. I'm sure classic and modern would've wanted to pounce on each other immediately upon sight. I mean how could they not when they're both the most gorgeous and sexy man 😍

during the events of the game, Orbot and Cubot weren't around to bother them at all because modern Egg cruelly left them in the cold vaccum of space when he pursued the Time Eater, and classic Egg didn't have any assistant lackey robots back then to be an issue in the first place. so they truly had peace for some precious alone time for a little while and they were totally doing naughty things together hehe

with modern Egg being a bit older and more experienced, he could teach classic Egg not only scientific and battle knowledge and such that he learned over the years between them but also help him learn more about himself, his body, and things he's into but hasn't discovered at that point in time yet. he could get to be the one introduce him to new pleasures and discoveries earlier and that's hot 🤤

and they finally get to explore all their curiosities with each other that they've both fantasized about and know it because they're the same person and in love with themself. exploring the body of themselves at different points in life is very fascinating, they agree. but as they feel each other up they'll realize how exciting it is too, until they're fully fondling each other and giggling and kissing and things just keep escalating

they could've also used the opportunity to try things they were maybe too embarrassed to explore with others, so they can help each other fulfill all their desires and dreams, no matter how shy they are in suggestion. sometimes classic Egg would feel like that towards things modern tries to introduce him to early like "we're really into that?" and modern Egg gives him a very fun first experience with it that proves it >:)

there's so much fun and hot potential with them and they have great chemistry and tension in the couple scenes they have together, they're literally the best together 💜💘 that's why I must spread Eggman x Eggman propegganda as often as possible, I need everyone else to understand that they are the ultimate and most canon Eggman pairing fr. he only has a place in his heart for himself XD

and while they're the only pairing where I could actually see Eggman being genuinely loving, caring, and smitten only because it's himself, I love how they also still bicker and argue and piss each other off at the same time. there's no such thing as a completely perfectly healthy functional relationship with Eggman, further proven by the way that he can't even get along well for long with himself, it's so funny I love it lol

[baby-girl-e]

Mastermind

Characters - Iceman x Maverick

Summary - Maverick tells Ice that their relationship was of his own design. 

Word Count - 1k

Warnings - none

A/N - Okay I started writing this one IMMEDIATELY after listening to Taylor Swifts new album last night. This is going to be a series if you take a look at my master list and you can see the other Swift songs that’ll be in the collection! So in case you didn’t notice this is ‘Mastermind’ by Taylor Swift but make it Icemav. 

Enjoy!

They’re in bed on a Friday night, like always, and Maverick is draped across Ice’s chest like a cat. He was like that sometimes, especially after sex. Clingy in the best way, it made Ice feel needed. 

“Baby?”

“Mmmhh?” Was mavericks only response. An unidentifiable noise.

“You with me babe?”

He felt Maverick shift on him slightly and then he’s met with green eyes, his chin perched on Ice’s chest. A cat really. 

“Not really, but that’s your fault.”

Ice laughs and leans down to meet him for a kiss. When Pete gets adorable like this it’s hard to resist. 

“Think you’re with me enough to answer a question?”

“For you? Absolutely.”

Tom had been wondering about something for a while. He knew the exact moment he fell for Maverick and he knew he fell hard. It was right after a hop when Pete and Nick were laughing about something stupid in the locker room. It was the first time Tom had heard Pete’s genuine laugh and oh, he was hooked. Once they actually did get together, he’d always wondered when it happened for him. Blame the insecure child in him. 

“When… Um, When was it that you knew you liked me?”

Pete laughs and buries his face in Ice’s chest. 

“Is that really your question?”

“What’s so funny? It’s a normal question.” Ice was laughing now too, unable to keep the joy at being with this man from his voice. 

“It is hun, I’m sorry it just caught me off guard.�� 

“...so?”

He was going to get his answer damn it, and now was the perfect time, when he was… suggestive. 

“Well tommy, if you must know, it was the first moment I saw you.”

He’s going to breeze past the name he hates just this once. 

“The first? Like in the classroom?”

“Hey, you asked!”

Tom pulls Pete up closer to him so they’re now side by side, still in each other’s arms. He can’t believe this man. 

“I know, but really Pete? The first?”

“Yes. Now can we go to sleep?”

He was avoiding something. There was a twinkle in his boyfriend's eye that only meant trouble. 

“Pete, what are you not telling me?”

“It’s a little embarrassing so I’m going to keep it between me and Goose if you don’t mind.”

Goose was in on it too? Who was he kidding, the two were unable to separate for longer than a couple of hours. It was a miracle Tom got Pete into bed in the first place. 

“Peter Mitchell, you better tell me right now.”

Pete throws his head back in laughter. Clearly amused by his boyfriends flustered face. 

“Fine, fine. Well, when I first saw you I was attracted to you within a millisecond. Like god damn boy, I was floored.”

Ice was actively blushing. It wasn’t like Pete hadn’t complimented him before, he did at every opportunity, Ice just wasn’t used to it yet.

“And in that moment I decided, I was going to make you mine no matter what.” 

Now that really made Tom pause. 

“You… what?”

“Yeah, I decided in my head right then that I’d do whatever it took to be with you. Even told Goose. He was… exasperated but on board.”

“Wait, so what did you actually do?”

Pete had that twinkle again, like he knew something Tom didn’t. This guy was going to be the death of him he swears. 

“Well that night we went to the O’ club, I kinda followed you around. Not like stalker-y but I always made sure you were in my eyeline.”

“Pete that’s the definition of stalker!”

“Hush now, let me finish. Then I really started to amp up the flirting you know? Like I don’t know if you noticed, but I’m not a touchy person but I felt it prudent that I touched your shoulder as often as I could, even when you called me dangerous.”

Tom didn’t even think that Pete knew what the word ‘prudent’ meant. Tonight he was full of surprises.

“And Goose would very conveniently walk away from any conversation the three of us were having. A true wingman honestly.”

“Hmm, remind me to send him a fruit basket.”

“He would argue he deserves more, having to watch my pining.”

He was right, poor Goose probably had to put up with just as much as Slider did. Slider would often tell Tom to just kiss Mitchell already because he can only pull his hair out so much before he went bald. 

“Let’s make a point of getting the RIO’s something nice.”

Pete laughs again and Tom doesn’t think he’ll ever get over that noise. It made him into a sap that wanted to write fucking poetry about the sound. 

“Well anyways, I won’t bore you with the details of your calculated seduction, but hopefully you don’t mind that I was kinda the Mastermind of this relationship.” 

Ice smirked, in some way he already knew. Tom wasn’t a risk taker, it was in his callsign. There’s no way he would’ve risked his entire career if there wasn’t some part of him that knew his feelings were reciprocated. 

“Baby, you’re allowed to seduce me whenever you’d like. Just maybe be more obvious this time?”

“Oh you’d like that wouldn’t you?”

Tom nods and leans in to kiss him as his answer. His whole life he had been preparing himself to be alone. It sounds sadder than it really is, it’s just what lonely people did to protect themselves. Expect nothing and you’ll never be disappointed, the only price you pay is giving up on love. It was an easy price at the time, especially for someone like him in a world like this. But apparently Pete ‘Maverick’ Mitchell had other plans, and thank god for that. Pete made him not only feel loved, but wanted, and needed. Like his presence alone was enough to pull the smaller pilot out of a funk. And damn it if he didn’t love it. 

Thank god for the Mastermind. 

[bite-sized-devil]

Hi Saadie! Congrats on 500+ Followers!

Here's my info for the matchup! ^^

Star Sign : (November) Scorpio Age : 18 Height : 5'3 Identity : Female; She/Her MBTI : INFJ-T Occupational : (tired) College Student Favorite Things : I like books (mostly fantasy), action movies, musicals, my computer (lol), any type of music, anime, flowers such as azaleas and roses, milk chocolate, birthday cards my sister makes for me and butterscotch ice cream What I do in my spare time : Read books or fics, play piano, watch gamers on YouTube and sometimes sketch random objects out of boredom What I look for in a partner : Passionate, loyalty, overall great sense of humor, kindness, funny (my humor be broken haha) and honesty! Favorite Obey Me Character(s) : Mammon, Leviathan, Satan Belphegor and Barbatos Appearance : I am a South Asian person who has olive-peach skin but not so pale looking either. I have a really small mole on the left side of my cheek. I have short black hair, light brown eyes, pretty big eyelashes and am pretty much average in height (or short- not sure how much 5'3 is classified in some countries lol). I have small dark circles under my eyes which can't be distinguished since I wear glasses which somewhat covers them up.

I hope this is enough! If you need, I can DM you a picture of my appearance! ^^

( -@amberrskiies )

🌻 500 Followers Bite Sized Event 🌻

Hello cutie! I'm sorry this took a little while, I'm trying to go in order of who sent in first. I originally wanted to give each submission all of what I promised all at the same time but uhhhh.... That would take way to long 😂 and so I'm just releasing the match ups first then I'll do the fics/script fics if I haven't already written them. Oh also nightbringer distracted me a buuuunch! So sorry!!

Mostly SFW, slightly suggestive. 💕

Match up:

Satan Avatar of Wrath

May I offer scrunky furious cat boy to you? He's very passionate, funny, loyal and honest! I think he'd be quite taken with you, you love to read and play the piano what a charming little thing you are 💕 He'd love to help you study for your exams, you'll reward him with kisses won't you?

Head canons for you two:

This mother fucker actually asked you out mid screaming match with Lucifer. Or well actually you think that's what happened? You remember "MC GOOD YOU'RE HERE I WANT TO TAKE YOU TO DINNER! THAT IS AS SOON AS IM FINISHED WITH THIS ARSEHOLE RIGHT HERE!" So now you're in your room at HOL dressed and ready but starting to think maybe you heard wrong? Your brain doesn't really function properly during screaming matches, even ones you aren't involved in. So you're sitting on your bed considering changing before anyone notices you're all dressed up. Fuck that would be so embarrassing! But you hear a knock on the door, just one simple but sharp knock. It has you up off your bed in seconds racing to the door nearly as fast as the beat your heart is setting. You open the door and find him there waiting. He gives you a warm smile and takes your small hands in his. "Your beauty flaws me MC, truly you are something to behold. I want to apologise for my rudeness earlier, I'm not sorry I asked you to dinner. Just how I went about it."

How cute is it when you read together. 🥰 Your head resting on one of his legs reading your lastest fantasy novel. The fingers of his free hand comb through your short black locks absentmindedly. His other hand holds his book against the thigh of his raised knee. It's mostly comfortable, until he gets to an intense part and the fingers in your hair are no longer combing but sharply pulling as his hand gets turned into a fist. He's quick to pull you into his arms and smother you in sweet kisses in-between sorry's when he hears you utter a quiet 'ouch'.

If you weren't a member of the anti-lucifer club you are now. Pranking just became a favourite pastime for you both. If anything Lucifer is thankful as you tend to do childish pranks now instead of murderous ones.

Can he help you study? Please, he'll be good! He won't distract you! Say you'll let him help you, he'd love to. Honestly he'll only kiss you a little bit, promise they will only be as rewards for correct answers and not because you look so cute when you're concentrating. Oh no, was that a paper cut? He'll kiss it better, he'll kiss it better at your wrist, up your arm, along your collar bone, over your pulse point, along your jaw, over your lips with his tongue down your throat. Wait where did it hurt again? You can't remember, everything feels hazy. No pain, or study, only Satan.

It is now your life's mission to find a horror movie that actually scares Satan. Unfortunately you haven't found one yet, it's not however unfortunate for Satan. He loves watching horror movies with you, loves the way you tuck yourself in close to his side almost half hidden from the screen. Thinks it's so cute the way you jump and squeal a little at jump scares. Once you actually jumped into his lap, he kept you there the entire rest of the film just holding you close. So yeah he definitely likes watching them with you.

Will absolutely loose his shit if you dress up as a kitty. He's a blushing, stuttering mess! He's so fucking into you, and then you do this? His brain isn't working, not enough blood reaching it... It's circulating elsewhere. 😳

No offence to Satan or whatever but can you do me a favour and teach him how to dress himself properly? This might shock him a little but when you wear a coat you usually use both of the sleeves 😂 also stop with the hats! Again respectfully no offence 🙏

When you're together he always has to have a hand on you. It's more of a starved for affection thing rather than possessive. He really can't seem to get enough of you. It's his hand in yours, or at the small of your back, or wrapped around you. Or if he's feeling naughty grabbing your ass.

If you wanted more NSFW content I'm sorry! I felt kinda weird writing it for an 18yo like I'm some sort of predator! I'm like 10 years older then you, it gave me some icky feelings. So I'm sorry! 😔😔

[ithaquasbbg]

Mmmm day two of Itha month and I am 😮 wow! I will work on reqs when I publish this ☺️

Day 02 - “Karmas not on your side”

Pairing : none in this fic.. it’s more of a Ithaqua character study. I really want to chew him and shake him.

TW: death, violence, I think like mentions of self die ideas, brief implications of child neglect though nothing deep.

A young Ithaqua walks though the forest with his lantern in hand, enjoying the peace and quiet he gets when he’s outside alone. It’s not that he doesn’t love his mother, he does! But sometimes, it’s more calming to be alone, rather than having to speak with somebody. He smiles and feels the cold wind coming in from the east, a sign that winter was soon approaching. The heat of the summer was slowly fading and the leaves were turning a lovely rainbow of oranges and reds.

He enjoys watching the birds fly away for the winter, seeing them all in one big happy group together, one big happy family. He and his mother have one small, but happy family, he thinks. Ithaqua is startled out of his mind by the sound of a young boy crying, being scolded by a man for god knows what. Against his better judgement, Ithaqua gets up and walks closer to the sound, hiding behind a tree while he watches.

In front of him stands a man he can only see the back of, and a young boy who looks like a mirror image of himself, minus the difference in clothing. There’s a red handprint across his cheek, suggesting he had been slapped moments prior. “Don’t come back to me and your mother until you can stop crying, understand me?” The man asks, his body language being startling to the boy in front of him, along with Ithaqua. “Yes father” The boy nods, staring at the ground as tears roll down his cheeks. The boys father walks away not long after, leaving his son out next to the lake until he can calm down.

Ithaqua doesn’t mean to make any noise, but he realizes that he does moments later when the boy looks over at the tree, wiping his eyes. “Who’s there..?” His voice is shaking ever so slightly as he tries to find the source of the noise. Feeling a little guilty that he had scared the boy, Ithaqua walks out from behind the tree, standing awkwardly in front of his mirror image.

“You look just like me..” The boy whispers, going closer to Ithaqua, the tears slowing down as he finds something else to focus on. “Who are you?” He asks. Ithaqua is startled by his ‘reflection’ coming this close to him, but shakes it off quickly. “I’m Ithaqua.. I live close by.” He tries to explain himself, trying to reassure the other that he is not in fact out to kill the boy in front of him.

“Ithaqua? What a strange name..” he mumbles, getting close enough to touch Ithaqua’s hair, as if checking to see if he’s truly real. “I’m Nathaniel, normally I’d say it’s nice to meet you but.. this is just embarrassing” He chuckles sadly, wiping his eyes once more. Ithaqua feels sympathy towards Nathaniel, though he’s never been in an even remotely similar experience with his mother. “How come your father is mad at you?” He finds himself asking, letting the curiosity get the better of him.

This clearly takes Nathaniel by surprise, though he doesn’t seem all to upset by the question. Instead, it seems like he’s been wanting to speak to somebody. “He wants me to follow his footsteps as magistrate but.. I cannot even come close to being what he expects me to be.” Nathaniel laughs. “Funny isn’t it? I’m sharing all this to a stranger? Though, at least I know you probably wouldn’t know anyone to say this all to..” Ithaqua gently pats the other young boy on the back, offering him a gentle smile.

“If I promised you something, anything, could you help me get away from him?” Nathaniel asks later on that night while they sit in front of the lake, skipping stones. “I’m afraid of my father.. I don’t feel safe around him.” Ithaqua is stunned by this and turns to face Nathaniel, about to open his mouth to speak when he hears footsteps. “Nathaniel Norwell! What in heavens sake do you think you’re doing out here with some stranger?!” His father is coming closer to the both of them quickly, his face red in anger.

He grips onto Nathaniel’s arm, pulling him away from Ithaqua and back down the path. “Please, help me!” Nathaniel says, trying to reach out for Ithaqua’s hand in a desperate attempt to stay with his new friend. But Ithaqua is frozen in shock, simply watching as his mirror gets pulled away into the forest, sobbing. That night when Ithaqua gets home, he has a hard time sleeping, his thoughts going back to the boy he had met at the lake.

….

Years later, Ithaqua stands at the same lake. It’s winter, and the water is iced over, thick enough that you could go skating on it should you wish. But, he finds more comfort in watching the birds fly overhead than skating. In a split second, that peace is ruined by the loud screaming of a woman, coming from the direction of Ithaqua’s home. “Mother?!” He shouts, getting up and running to the home as fast as he possibly could.

After sneaking inside through a window in the back, he’s met with a terrifying scene. The home is beginning to go up in flames, and his mother sits on the ground in the entryway screaming in terror. She’s chained up and forced to listen to the people in front of her. When Ithaqua looks up.. he sees his own face, his mirror.

He thinks to himself, “surely this can’t be true, the boy I met years ago would never do this!” But when he stops to look, hand covering his mouth to stop his sobs.. he once again sees his own hideous reflection laughing while his mother is dragged out the door. For what feels like hours and hours Ithaqua sobs, unable to pull himself together. But after a long period of crying, he is able to pull himself up and grab a knife from their kitchen, stuffing it in his pocket and following the still fresh footsteps of those monsters.

….

When he gets to where Mother is being held, he has to put up the act that he is Nathaniel. It’s sickening, and he wants to vomit the entire time. But Ithaqua pushes himself down the hallway and into a room that he can hear screaming from. In front of him is a horrifying sight, his mother on her knees pleading for the release of death. She’s bruised and bloody, her once lively eyes filled with nothing but terror.

After seeing this, Ithaqua feels as if he’s lost himself. One moment, he was hiding behind a table, and the next moment he’s sitting above Nathaniel, covered in blood. Nathaniel has a look of horror on his face, staring up at Ithaqua’s face. After a second, he erupts into a fit of sobs, pleading for Ithaqua to help him like he did so many years prior. He begs and begs for what feels like an eternity, until Ithaqua can feel his heart stop. When he realizes what he’s done, he panics and rushes to write a suicide note, framing the young man’s death as a suicide instead of a murder.

When all is said and done, he takes his mother who had been unconscious for a while out of the building, rushing back home in order to help treat her wounds. What Ithaqua doesn’t expect, is for his mother to be terrified at the sight of his own face. “Get away from me you monster!” She shouts, hitting him and trying to get away as desperately as she can. This terrifies Ithaqua, his once loving and gentle mother was now hurting him, saying she hated him.

He lays her down in the charred remains of her bed, closing the door and walking to his own room, staring at the mirror in front of him. The next thing he knows, he’s standing next to a pile of glass shards, his fist bleeding. After wrapping the wound up and trying to clean the glass, he makes the decision to wear a mask around his mother. This way, she would not panic at the mere sight of him anymore.

….

Weeks pass and the winter turns into spring. But, Ithaqua’s mother only declines. She gets worse and worse until one day, her hand goes cold in his, and Ithaqua is left alone. He doesn’t know what to do with himself, so he sits for months in his room. The once lively cottage now filled with rodents and bugs, his room a mess, falling apart around him.

Ithaqua takes off his mask to look in the shattered mirror one more time. He would forever have to wear the face of the boy he had let down, and the man he had brutally murdered. He would also have to live the rest of his life knowing that he couldn’t save his own mother, that she died hating his face more than anything.

-end-

Hehe yipeeeeee day two is done and now I can sleep :)

[otometrashqueen]

So in keeping with my Doctor Strange, Batch obsession, I decided to start watching Sherlock

Aaaaaaaannnd, I have many thoughts, I just finished season 2, sorry this will be a long one, be warned there are probably some unpopular opinions below 👇

I really WANT to like this show, it’s super popular, and maybe Batch in all his British voice glory really makes the whole thing, but I find that what I dislike about the show outweighs what I like thus far…

I just can’t get over the fact that thus far in the show there isn’t a single likable female character, except for Mrs. Hudson and even she is characterized as the ‘crazy little old land lady’ ( but I do love her to pieces don’t get me wrong)

It seems the show goes out of its way to make the females the villains or weak, Sherlock has an antagonistic relationship with every single female that he comes across

Molly for example, she deserves so much better, Sherlock constantly steam rolls her and berates her, he apologizes sometimes, but it doesn’t ever really feel genuine bc he continues to do it, her uses her for her access to the morgue and the lab! She had to make him say thank you for it but that wasn’t genuine either, he like didn’t understand

Molly really should have slapped him that one time he embarrassed her at Christmas and then Kissed her cheek! The nerve of the man, like that made everything ok

Molly and Sherlock had a little moment at the season two finale that I thought was promising but she essentially said ‘ I know you don’t love me and you love John but I would still do anything for you,’ gag, but I also understand that sentiment, having experienced unrequited love a few times myself and then he ended up asking for her help! which still seemed like manipulation more than genuine interest in her friendship :/

Also it broke my heart that after that whole exchange with Molly and asking for her help, she wasn’t listed as one of his friends to Moriarty, only John, Lestrade, and Mrs. Hudson :/

Irene Adler, who I loved the idea of , still ended up having to get saved by Sherlock, she sold him out to Moriarty, and then he ignored her texts bc he likes her or something?! I didn’t get that

You can also talk about the female Sargent Donovan, has had it out for Sherlock day 1 and she was the one to suggest that Sherlock was a fraud to Lestrade

In the season 2 finale they focus on the female jury member when Jim explains how he threatened all the jurors

Then when they were tracking the kidnapped kids it was the BOY that loved spy novels and painted his shoes in black light paint, the BoY was the clever one, not the girl

The girl screamed at Sherlock making Donovan think Sherlock had something to do with it when that was probably Moriartys set up 🙄

That female reporter from that crooked newspaper in the finale also antagonized Sherlock and stupidly bought Moriartys story 🙄

Sherlock even berates all of John’s girlfriends and dates whether out of jealousy or just shit writing it was kind of funny at first and by now to me is a tired cycle, yes we get you want his d and your jealous as shit

I’m sure there are probably more examples, but its TIRING to me, all the negativity toward women and it makes me not want to continue watching

And it’s disappointing bc I saw Moffat was a cocreator and I really liked some of the women that he created in Doctor Who, it’s just really surprises me that THIS is what he helped make?!

I know it was back in 2010 and I’m not mad about the gay subtext, I love it! I’m a bisexual person, bring on all the gay drama. Actually I find it frustrating that Sherlock and John just don’t accept their feelings and get it on already! You can do a slow burn gay love story and not women hate or shit on women in the process :/

Honestly if they had kept Sherlock asexual I think that would have made it more interesting and hilarious, but he is obviously in love with John and even has his flirtation with Moriarty all good stuff but again I flinch when a new female comes on screen bc it’s like ‘ what bad thing is she going to do now’ 🙄 what nasty thing is Sherlock going to say to her or ‘deduce’ about her, it makes me cringe

I’ve heard season 3 and 4 aren’t much better and I’d really like to finish the series and I probably will but I’ll probably be ranting about it on here again 😆

Honestly, it other people’s fanfics on here that are saving this show for me, so thank you fan creators 🥺🙏🏻

I’m really only in it for HIM 👀

[starlight-phantom]

🤡😈🎶 for the fic writer asks and 4, 19, and 31 for the OC asks! ^^

🤡 - What's a line, scene or exchange you've written that made you laugh?

Honestly there's three main ones that come to mind and I was so disappointed that none of them got attention from readers, although I guess that just tells me that my sense of humour isn't very good.

Two of them are from my P5R Chat fic, the first one being the group talking about Goro giving Ren his phone number after the interview where Ren says the Thieves do more than the cops and everyone laughing at Goro with Futaba jokingly saying "Oh shit, this guy called a loser on national TV, I have to slide into those DMs"

The other P5R Chat fic one is from the showbiz chat (between Goro, Ann, Sumire and Hifumi) and they're talking about all the interviews Goro used to do and how often he'd be asked about his type of woman when, in this fic, Goro is gay. So he remarks about "What was I supposed to say? 'What do you look for in a woman?' I don't. I look elsewhere."

And the last one was from my Gorotaba siblings fic where Futaba is teasing Goro over text about his crush on Ren and how he won't admit it, so she sends a link and says it's Goro and I actually put a link in the fic and it sends you to a YouTube video of I Won't Say I'm In Love from Hercules.

Explaining these jokes here suddenly makes them not seem funny anymore and now I'm just embarrassed. Also, I've noticed that all three examples are me teasing Goro. I love this boy, but I love teasing him even more.

😈 - Has there been a point in a story where you did something just to be playfully mean to your readers?

I never really write sad stuff to be mean. Mostly I just have a sad idea, it makes me sad and I realise it would work really well so I write it and sometimes it comes out sadder than I first thought. For example, For The Best was the first fic that made me cry while writing it and that caught me completely off guard.

However, I will admit, I did add in some extra scenes in the flashback section of Someone I Used To Know just because it would make it more painful and while, yes I was grinning when the idea hit me, I don't consider it playfully mean because I was hurting myself too.

🎶 - Do you listen to music while you write? What song have you been playing on loop lately?

I'm stuck on my phone so listening to music is pretty much the only thing I can do while writing because fuck you I'm not paying for YouTube premium even though it would really help me focus because for some reason hearing people talking instead of music helps me focus more.

And unfortunately, I'm stuck listening to the same songs on repeat and have been for months because my phone's music app is weird and randomly deleted a bunch of songs and won't let me get more. No, I don't know how to fix it. And yes, being stuck with the same 200 songs on repeat for the past... Half a year? Has been driving me to insanity, thanks for asking.

Don't even suggest using Spotify because I am a grandma in a 22 year old's body and I have no fucking clue how to use technology.

4 - A character you rarely talk about

Unfortunately, that's most of them... Especially since certain ones get a lot more attention than others. But it's mostly the ones with personalities I find difficult to write... So usually the serious, responsible members of the group because chaos is way easier to write.

19 - Introduce an OC that means a lot to you (and explain why)

Honestly? Probably Sora. Because I made them after realising I was non-binary so they're my first OC who doesn't fall within the gender binary (They're genderfluid) and I basically made their personality just a free spirit like they're cheeky, they're loud, they're confident, they're unapologetic. They're basically everything I wish I was. Except for their fashion sense, I deliberately made their fashion sense terrible to make them more endearing and funny... And to piss off Kenji, who is extremely fashion conscious.

31 - Pick one OC of yours and explain what their Tumblr blog would be like (what they reblog, layout, anything really)

Oh god, describing things has always been the thing I'm worst at... I dunno... I guess Aki? His blog would be full of pictures of him skating, his friends, food he really enjoyed and random rants about whatever series he's watching at the time??? And I don't even know the first thing about layouts... I meant it when I said I was useless with technology, okay?