#it's not like I don't understand why people would see it the whole “mating dance” comment etc

[waitingforsecretsouls]

Much as I theoretically understand why fandom glomped onto the possibility of the tragic Daeron and Addam romance, it genuinely doesn't seem like the closest explanation the text itself offers. One of the biggest implications people see for this is the paragraph wondering about Tessarion's motivations for intervening in the Vermithor vs Seasmoke fight:

Vermithor’s size and weight were too much for Seasmoke to contend with, Lord Blackwood told Grand Maester Munkun many years later, and he would surely have torn the silver-grey dragon to pieces…if Tessarion had not fallen from the sky at that very moment to join the fight. Who can know the heart of a dragon? Was it simple bloodlust that drove the Blue Queen to attack? Did the she-dragon come to help one of the combatants? If so, which? Some will claim that the bond between a dragon and dragonrider runs so deep that the beast shares his master’s loves and hates. But who was the ally here, and who the enemy? Fire & Blood Chapter 17: The Dying of the Dragons — Rhaenyra Overthrown

People tend to focus a lot on the love aspect and basically ignore the alternate possibility offered up, which is hate as a motivating force.

As happy as I am for people enjoying the concept of Daeron/Addam, let's acknowledge that they have neither actual on page interactions nor as much as implied aquaintanceship, and GRRM is the opposite of subtle when it comes to "hinting" at these things for implied same sex entanglements. One line about Addam, who canonically served on his mothers trading cogs, having previously traveled as far as Oldtown, or Daeron enjoying spending his off - time at Oldtown's or prior to his fostering King's Landings harbour or shipyards would have been sufficient, but instead there's absolutely nothing.

Whereas Daeron and Hugh Hammer, dragonseed and rider of Vermithor, do have canonical interactions, both on page involving dialogue and implied by their close proximity, that develops into a plot relevant enmity, culminating in Hugh stating he'll claim Daeron's birthright for himself, as rider of the largest surviving dragon, and Daeron approving the Caltrops assassination of Hugh in turn.

With his brother Aemond slain as well, the greens found themselves kingless and leaderless. Prince Daeron stood next in the line of succession. Lord Peake declared that the boy should be proclaimed as Prince of Dragonstone at once; others, believing Aegon II dead, wished to crown him king. The Two Betrayers felt the need of a king as well…but Daeron Targaryen was not the king they wanted. “We need a strong man to lead us, not a boy,” declared Hard Hugh Hammer. “The throne should be mine.” When Bold Jon Roxton demanded to know by what right he presumed to name himself a king, Lord Hammer answered, “The same right as the Conqueror. A dragon.” And truly, with Vhagar dead at last, the oldest and largest living dragon in all Westeros was Vermithor, once the mount of the Old King, now that of Hard Hugh the bastard. Vermithor was thrice the size of Prince Daeron’s she-dragon Tessarion. No man who glimpsed them together could fail to see that Vermithor was a far more fearsome beast. [...] The lords and knights of Oldtown and the Reach were offended by the arrogance of the Betrayer’s claim, however, and none more so than Prince Daeron Targaryen himself, who grew so wroth that he threw a cup of wine into Hard Hugh’s face. (...) Lord Hammer said, “Little boys should be more mannerly when men are speaking. I think your father did not beat you often enough. Take care I do not make up for his lack.” The Two Betrayers took their leave together, and began to make plans for Hammer’s coronation. When seen the next day, Hard Hugh was wearing a crown of black iron, to the fury of Prince Daeron and his trueborn lords and knights.

[...] Though Prince Daeron was not present at the council, the Caltrops (as the conspirators became known) were loath to proceed without his consent and blessing. Owen Fossoway, Lord of Cider Hall, was dispatched under cover of darkness to wake the prince and bring him to the cellar, that the plotters might inform him of their plans. Nor did the once-gentle prince hesitate when Lord Unwin Peake presented him with warrants for the execution of Hard Hugh Hammer and Ulf White, but eagerly affixed his seal. Fire & Blood Chapter 17: The Dying of the Dragons — Rhaenyra Overthrown

Which seams like a far more (meaning: at all) established backdrop for that musing about sharing loves and hates to me.

Tldr; Less "love wins" and more "haterism transcending death" for Daeron the Daring.

[reiincarnatiion]

shadows of destiny | azriel x reader | part one

summary : 3 sisters for 3 brothers....right? Azriel believes wholeheartedly that Elain should be his mate and in doing so ignores his deep feelings for you.

🧚‍♀️

a/n : I haven't written in like 6 years since my draco malfoy and kpop fanfictions HAHA so please forgive me I am rusty!! Also I wrote this on my phone eeee

but finally eee I'm so excited to post my first writing on tumblr !! I was always a quotev and wattpad girly but here I am finally... 💗

just writing some rough short stories rn but I'll def write more as I get more comfortable again and into the rhythm! let me know what you think please 🫶🏼

ps: it's not proof read cuz I'm lazy I'm so sorry so please ignore mistakes dearies

-----🩷🧚‍♀️💗------

You watched as Azriel bent down to whisper something into Elains ear and you felt a growl beginning to build up in your throat.

You didn't know the mating bond did this ; make one so possessive and jealous that the half-moon nail marks on your palms had become blood red, from gripping your fists too strongly.

"I just don't understand why you can't tell him," a voice whispers next to you. You turn to acknowledge Mor, as she slips in next to you into the booth.

"Because the moment I do, this whole dynamic changes Mor," you whisper back, indicating to the sprawl of people around you.

You guys had come to Rita's once again, to party, drink, kiss and do other nonsense things Cassian had eagerly talked about, whilst pitching the idea to the group. It had started off fun, with everyone talking together but as the night had progressed, they had all paired off. You could see Feyre and Rhys making out in the corner of your eyes and Nesta and Cassian dancing around each other on the club floor. Elain and Azriel had also innocently gotten up and moved to another table, using a range of excuses you hadn't bothered to process.

Even Mor had a female making eyes at her from afar.

"Then change the dynamic, Y/N. I need some excitement in my life," she whispered furiously again and slid out, stalking to the female at the bar.

Groaning you sunk into the booth, left alone to your thoughts plagued by one thing only, Azriel.

The repetitive music slowly faded out, as you downed drink after drink, watching the others around you mingle and grind away into the depths of the night. They would come past your table and say a few words before being dragged away again.

But not once did he come. Not once did he even look in your direction... and it infuriated you.

"You look more miserable than me,"

You blinked, looking up to focus in on the flop of red hair, braids and whizzing metallic eye and a handsome jawline.

"Lucien!!!" you let out a whine, attempting to get up but falling back down in the process, not having realised how much strong alcohol you had consumed in the last hour.

"Woah there stargirl," he slipped in next to you, using the nickname only he used for you.

Lucien and you had met on Starfall, as you had been leaning on the balcony, apparently being half a second from falling over because of your drunk eagerness to "catch one of the stars", and since then, he had named you Stargirl. Your friendship had blossomed due to your matching humour and desire to travel the realms.

His shoulder pressed up against you, his warmth spread through you, making you feel giddy. You couldn't tell if it was the alcohol or your desperation, as you abruptly laid a hand on his thigh.

If he noticed, he didn't show it as he took a swig of one of the elixirs that you had in your hand.

As he drank, you watched his eyes zero in on his elusive mate and you swore you saw them darken.

His scent visibly changed as he placed the now empty cup back on the table with a lethal fluidness that had you wondering how good he was at controlling his emotions.

"Its a shame we are mated to the wrong people, otherwise you and I would have ruled the world" he whispers, still not looking at you.

Your breath catching in your throat, your heavy heart pangs with emotion, exaggerated from the effects of the ethanol.

"At least she knows you are her mate Lucien... he doesn't even know about me," you miserably mutter.

You feel Luciens hot gaze rest on you as you look up into his deep eyes.

There's no doubt the turmoil of seeing each other's mates together shines in both of your eyes, but behind the pathetic nature of the situation, a force glint shines through his.

"Then why don't we tell him, Y/N," he urges, a smirk growing on his face.

Your heart drops as you make eye contact with Lucien, his eyes glinting with jealousy and anger.

You had never seen Lucien ever break his calm facades, he always would take whatever Elain would throw at him ; why was he so fired up tonight?

"You have always been so kind to Elain and given her time Lucien, why do you want to make her jealous now?" you voice your thoughts, causing him to look away, as you attempt to search his eyes.

Little did you know or feel, the dark cool gaze that had been assessing you since the moment Lucien had slipped in.

If one were to look through your party at this moment in time, the looks of longing and jealously swirling between you and Lucien could easily have been interpreted as longing and hunger for each other. With now, your full body turned to him, intimately touching him, shoulder to shoulder, anyone could mistake you as a couple.

---

Azriel nodded patiently as he listened to Elain talk about the new plants she wished to acquire from the Dawn Court for her garden.

He was trying so hard to listen and be attentive, but it was difficult when his shadows were buzzing about him, even more frantically, with the effects of the alcohol he had been consuming throughout the night.

He knew the amount of pumps of the vanilla perfume you had sprayed onto yourself, he knew how many times you had sighed throughout the night and he knew of the half-moon marks on your hands. His shadows told him everything, even when he didn't want to know.

For he didn't want to know the looks Lucien and you were giving each other, he didn't want to acknowledge the clenching of your thighs or the hand on your thigh or the-

"-So what do you think Azriel?"

Elains sweet voice cut in deeply through his silent spiralling, as he hummed coming back to the present.

Her big doe eyes innocently looked up at him as he racked his brain for what she had been asking about.

"YES I think the plants would be wonderful-," he began, when his shadows started screaming, "Elain excuse me one moment."

He quickly got up, his eyes narrow and jaw clenching as he went to get out of the booth in haste.

Elains eyes followed him and they widened slightly.

Luciens' hands were on your waist, holding you up from behind, as you both made your way to the dance floor, giggling.

---

read [ part two ] here deariess <3

[emmitaaa4]

Minor HOFAS spoilers ig?

The Walmart bonus chapter just leaked and good lord some people need to be for real. I'm so tired of people picking and choosing evidence.

So you're telling me that *gasp* Azriel's shadows seem to dance when he hums?? they react to sound/music?? no way. people from all sides of the fandom have been saying that for years (and use it for different arguments), and looks like ppl are still tying anything they can to feed their ship--which is fine but at least make it somewhat accurate.

The above is the last page of the Az/Bryce/Nesta chapter, and just as a refresher, this is the oh-so controversial phrases from the Az bonus chapter:

"(...) one of his shadows went out to dance with it (gwyn's breath) before twirling back to him. like it heard some silent music." and "(...) he could have sworn a faint, beautiful singing followed him. could have sworn his shadows sang in answer."

I'm confused, which is it? Was the shadow's reaction to her breath & the singing he heard all metaphorical, thereby hinting at a mating bond between gwyn & az (as in "music between souls")? Or was it rather azriel's shadows reacting to a literal sound coming from someone who has arguably been hinted at having some voice/song-related abilities? Because if it is the first, then this new HOFAS excerpt is completely unrelated. Well unless Azriel has a mating bond with himself? pleaseee make it make sense I beg. And if the second is true, it would mean that for someone to be able of making his shadows dance, they'd have to have similar powers as him... its just gonna fuel the lightsinger theories (which btw approx 5 ppl are saying means that gWyn is eViL) so this literally changes nothing. nada. absolument rien.

Oh also.

"He says no partner right now, aka NO FUCKING ELRIEL. ELRIEL IS DEAD." (no hate to whoever posted that btw)

He literally rushes out that answer. Idk about you guys but to me the poor man still seems internally dead over the whole mate existential crisis, which as far as we know was left with him wondering "what if the cauldron was wrong". Sidenote but if I understood correctly, this all happens 2-3 months post acosf and Bryce spends ±5 days in Prythian, so it is very likely that it is all set during Acotar 5, and that the events of HOFAS in general are happening while Az is separated from the other MC (ie. the acotar5 FMC).

Regardless of all I just said, I am going to ask people once again to be for real. cause this whole chapter Azriel keeps glaring at Nes when she is about to reveal too much info, so WHY would he be mentioning Elain (or literally anyone he cares about) to someone who he is said to be highly suspicious of? make it make sense x2

Almost forgot. Last thing.

"Azriel said that Nesta killed the King! He didn't credit Elain!"

... no? for context, this is what Az said:

See my second point above. He told Bryce exactly what Nes did, and nothing more: she beheaded Hybern. We could speculate about what his look at Truthteller made him think of... but tbh I'll leave it to someone else cause perso I dont really see the point.

I am getting tired guys... guess who finally understands what "fandom fatigue" is.

-----quick edit-----

I don't mean to sound hypocritical by tagging ships, cause tbh i dont even wanna put acotar ship tags to this, mais bon c'est la vie et j'en peux plus. this fandom is kind of a mess. Goodnight loves ♡

[acourtofthought]

I know I'm late to the discussion but I don't understand how people finding Bryce and Azriel ruling over dusk court more appealing and more believable than Gwyn and Azriel being mate/endgame. A court that doesn't exist as of now and we're not sure if it ever gonna happen and ruled by Bryce who is literally from another world and Azriel who is definitely not a ruler and enjoys being in shadows and can't be courtier to save his ass.

But Gwyn and Az? there's nO way Az would fall in love with her what are you talking about!!? Like it doesn't matter that Az was the one who slaughtered all of Gwyn's assulters in a heartbeat, the person who always leaves one to interrogate. or how he was the one who thought her how to defend herself and gave her private dagger lesson or how he was looking at her with pride and admiration when she cut the ribbon. Her not being afraid of his shadows and his shadows reacting to her. OR how at the end of acosf they were both spying at the same time...

yeah... I don't see it either!

I don't understand why people would want to take Sarah's three series that standalone and merge them into one indistinguishable series. Bryce is the FMC of CC and she has history with everyone in Midgard. Her mate, her brother, her friends, her job, her parents, the land itself with all the things she enjoys. It's an entire lifestyle that is so far from the lifestyle in the ACOTAR world. It's one thing to really love Az but it's a whole other thing to think that Az is reason enough to cancel out everything we're told of two other books that had nothing to do with the world of ACOTAR. Not that CC had nothing to do with information found in the ACOTAR series, their histories are connected in the same way Aelin's world is connected, they all share common origins. But they are uniquely different so why would you want make the universe smaller? We have an Throne of Glass series, with an old world feel to it. We have an ACOTAR series with an old world feel to have. Then we have the CC series. Why does anyone think SJM is going to take the one urban fantasy series that she's written and wipe it out so it can be absorbed into the ACOTAR world? She would literally be chopping her creative snakes head off only for the body would follow. She would be back down to only two series who both exist in a primitive setting. Back to Az. He's special but he is really no more special than any other MMC in her series. At one point, it doesn't even sound like SJM planned on writing his book considering she was signed on for three spin-offs, knew with certainty who was getting the first too (almost a guarantee it was Nesta / Elain since Nesta did get the first with her mate and she had done research for Elain's book who also has a mate) and was deciding between 5 different pairings for the third. I think by the time ACOFAS came around she hopped on board the "Az is getting a book" train but he's already had one interest he's been hopelessly in love with. He was given a second as a sort of "rebound" to the first without actually being over the first. Then he was given mate coded language with the third, felt amusement over the third, showed admiration for the third, has his shadows dance with the third, had something spark in his chest over the thought of her happiness. When you consider all that, does it really seem like Az is now going to have a fourth love interest when he hasn't even dealt with the very messy emotions he's got with the other three? It's got to be a joke honestly. Or a "I'd love if it happened though I know it won't." Note how in CC2, SJM was telling us of the tears she shed over Bryce meeting her "wonderful Rhys". It doesn't matter that Az is the one who found her or Az is the one who has the matching dagger, Rhys is the one Sarah was excited about when Bryce landed.

[mtnkat3]

Sometimes.. oh sometimes fighting for life & love... is like.. freaking Archangel Michael fighting in Legion [2010]. The odds, the world, are stacked against me. But. God knows me. My heart, mind, body, soul & spirit. He knows me.. pure. And for Him. As much pain as I may have caused others this year.. wobbly grimace.. tears drop. I take the blame. And the pain. Because I just don't freaking understand! I don't freakin know! I don't know if it was all a fantasy or something so extraordinarily beautiful I fall apart when I think about losing it all. I don't freakin know!!!!! Damn whys. Just flippin.. damnit! But after .. & today.. it's a reminder.. I love. Wholly. Deeply. But I have to give it to God. Until He releases the chains from my spine.. neck.. ankles.. the shackles that have chafed me raw for too long.. From cats fangs, to barely missing my eye, to a work accident that slit my wrist.. to weapons of all manner. I have worn shackles for days.. I've been thru it all.. not for fun either. I know the difference. I have a box of cuff keys.. just gathering dust. Got lots to sell. But I'll not sell me. My Mate /s .. only You Know God. Are out there. But today I've been here more than I will. Because. I will run to my soul's mates when I am told by God to.. & him.. whatever.. to. It's not about making a fool of myself either. Been there done that my whole life. No.. I can't take more. Whys.. rejections.. OMG I can't! So I will work. I will wait. I will not give up. But I will not ever be dancing on table tops either. Well.. Not unless it's a private show.. my gut instincts, my intuition, my soul.. are all screaming at me to hold on.. to wait. That all will be revealed. The masks flung, the veil, the shroud, the cloaking darkness.. will be ripped away.. & I will know.. God's Plans, Hands, Truth about it all. But dang it! I am so freakin tired! Of waiting! Of not knowing. Of things happening that affect me but remain beyond me. I am ready to scream! I'm ready to kick somebody's ass & balls up throats! I'm ready for years of answers & waiting to end! So I can start to build a beautiful life with the love.. of my soul! Is it really too much to ask to want to be loved.. for me!?!?!?!? Today.. so much.. I'm calm.. well.. some. Because I know God's got my back. And He has put one of His precious babies, my cat, into my care. And she knows.. mama is hurting. Why she's on my lap. Why she's been near a lot lately. Why she's purring. To calm me down. I gotta love her sweet spirit for knowing. And I have to protect her too. I sacrifice for her like I would a child. She's the only hug I got right now. Wobbly teary eyed. I'd give .. everything. That she has no pain. But she's older & I struggle to afford to.. I don't relish the thought of her passing. But I'm afraid.. omg. When I move.. whimpering cry. I'm gonna fall apart. She's God's Grace filled lil one that holds the gorilla glue & tape onto my shattered soul. God knows how much I need her right now! I know I'll take care of a lot more animals & people in my lifetime. But she's been with me 15 years. The longest I've had any. I just pray.. I've done right by her. And pray too to take care of any in the future as well as I have been Graced & Blessed with her! Oh & I'm allergic to cats & dogs, among many. I will not stop loving them because of it either! I'll bury my face in their furry coats & warmth & thank God Above for loving me with them! This is disjointed. But today. Dang it. I hate the whys. I'm gonna take my meds that I have.. go to bed & read my nap write. It makes me feel loved! Wanted.. craved.. desired.. maybe even adored.. all hard things for me to fathom. But I think that's why I see it so clearly. I feel it deeply. Why today .. sigh. I don't freakin know.. dang this was supposed to be short! Sigh. I don't know why.. but I love you. Whoever the heck you are! God help me.. please? I only know.. I believe. I never give up. And I love you all of me. I work & I await.

~True love never dies & true love always waits.~

Your struggling, bowed, hurting, impatiently patiently listening closely & quietly as I zip it.. daughter..

~Tijgeress kat Phoenix. 🌺

😿😖☔⚓🙏🙇‍♀️💡🌂🔗⛓🧰⚙⚒🛠⚔⚖🗽🦅🐯🐾🐐🦉🐢🐛🌱🌳🧶🧵🧣🥾🥧🍯🍼☕🍫🥤⌚⚡🌠🚀🗝🔱⚜🐻🦌🧩♠️♾🌎🍎🥮🍑🍒🍋🎯🧭🎶🕯

W.10.19.2022 1.14am est.

[kingandfireheart]

Cassian's Love: words from a guy who speaks through actions

Something I love about Cassian is that he doesn't really hide the ball when it comes to his feelings for Nesta. He's most definitely an actions speak louder than words person (physical touch is his love language), but he does use words in ACOSF. I read someone say that Cassian didn't show his love for Nesta, and I completely disagree. Even though SJM never showed us Cassian saying the actual words, we see it so often through the small touches like flicking her cheek, the way that he never makes fun of her (many) questions, or the way he's always there, but he never pushes her too far.

In ACOWAR he confesses his love

" I have no regrets in my life, but this. That we did not have time. That I did not have time with you, Nesta. I will find you again in the next world -- the next life. And we will have that time. I promise. "

Yes, there is a lot he doesn't say - that they are mates, that he wants more than just sex, that he loves her. He even goes far enough to attack Lanthys to prevent him from revealing the truth. (I can write a whole post on why he wouldn't tell her about being mates, but I think Nesta's reaction to Lucien's declaration at the end of ACOMAF can suffice as explanation).

After his heartbreaking confession in ACOWAR, it makes sense that he's more reserved with Nesta. When thinking about his almost confession on solstice, he even says, "He hardly managed to walk away with some semblance of pride. Over his cold, dead body would she do that to him again." He is protecting himself by ignoring the mating bond too ("Some small quiet part of his brain whispered otherwise. He ignored it. Had ignored it for a long time now.")

Still throughout the book, he owns up to his feelings for Nesta when given the opportunity -- he just doesn't say the words "I love you" or "You're my mate". This post goes through some scenes in chronological order, since they show how Cassian does care.

(I could write another whole post on how I feel cheated of two months of happy Nessian between Solstice and Starfall, but that's what fanfiction is for, right?).

When Mor asks if it pains him to see Nesta like this, he says:

"All of it pains me... It pains me that Nesta has become... this. It pains me that she and Feyre are always at each other's throats. It pains me that Feyre hurts over it, and I know Nesta does, too. It pains me that ..."

When he's pleading her to train, she asks him why he isn't negotiating harder, he says.

"For you, I have no strategies."

Then there's the confrontation before, "I'm always thinking of that look on your face". (Yes, he's goading her here, but I don't think he's lying)

"Why so many questions tonight?" // "Because we're talking like normal people, and I want to know. About all of it." // "Let's nor retread old territory, Nes." // "It never mattered to me whether you took half the Cauldron's power or a drop. It still doesn't matter. // "Why?" "Why do you even bother?" // "Why did you stay at my side when we went up against the King of Hybern during the last battle?"

Answer: because they're mates.

After Nesta fights with Elain, he tells her he'll be there for her.

"Whatever you need to throw at me, I can take it. I won't break." No challenge laced the words. Only a plea. // "You don't understand," she said, voice rasping. "I am not like you and the others." // "That's never bothered me one bit." (emphasis added)

When Rhys gives Nesta a mental warning about Gwyn:

"I'm pissed off that you can't seem to believe one good thing about her. That you refuse to fucking believe one good thing about her."

When they are discussing the Dread Trove and pushing Nesta to scry: Yes Cassian for arguing against only protecting Elain

" There is an innate darkness to the Dread Trove that should not be exposed to." // "But Nesta should?" Cassian growled.

"It's not right to wield Elain as a threat to manipulate Nesta into scrying." "There are harsher ways to convince Nesta, boy" "You're a fool if you think threats will make her obey you." ... "If we manipulate Nesta into scrying, even by using Elain against her, then we'll do what is necessary." "I don't like it."

After Nesta's nightmare:

"Hey." "Hello" "Are you all right?" "Yes." "Good" "You want to talk about it?" "No" "That's fine." "You want breakfast?" "I like your priorities, General." (italics added)

When Rhys and Feyre mention bringing in Helion:

"He'll help...If only for another shot at her." // Nesta rolled her eyes, and and the gesture was so normal that Cassian's smile became more genuine, edged with relief // You wear your heart for all to see, brother. Rhys said without turning Cassian's way. // Cassian only shrugged. He was past caring.

When they finally have sex , we have this short back-and-forth:

"I'll hurt you." // "I don't care" // "I do."

and my personal favorite

"I'm beyond lies right now, Nesta."

When Nesta asks whether Cassian enjoyed their previous encounter, he tells her:

I enjoyed myself too much. I've thought about it for days and days.

"Whatever you want. Whatever you need from me." He knew those were a fool's words, knew he offered up too much.

And when Nesta asks "How can I need you again so soon?" Answer: because they're mates.

"I've needed you from the moment I first met you. And now that I get to have you, I don't what to stop

When they find out about the new Dread Trove, he's quick to defend Nesta to others:

This scene isn't really dialogue, but I'm including it because I love Cass.

They moved on to far merrier subjects, but Cassian mulled it over throughout the evening. The fighting was only part of it. The Training would sustain her, funnel her rage, but there had to be more. There had to be joy. There had to be music. (emphasis added)

When Nesta breaks down at the end of the hike, we see that Cassian doesn't just love Nesta, but he likes her, he may even admire her.

"I don't know how to get there. I don't think I'm capable of it" // "You are. I've seen it -- I've seen what you can do when you are willing to fight for the people you love. Why not apply that same bravery and loyalty to yourself?"

"You don't need to become some impossible ideal. You don't need to become sweet and simpering. You can give everyone that I Will Slay My Enemies look - which is my favorite look, by the way. You can keep that sharpness I like so much, that boldness and fearlessness. I don't want you to ever lose those things, to cage yourself."

"I'll be with you every step of the way... Just don't lock me out. You want to walk in silence for a week, I'm fine with that. So long as you talk to me at the end of it." (emphasis added)

When Cassian and Nesta go to the prison, there are some more telling moments:

"What if my presence would go unnoticed, but yours sets off a trap? We can't risk that." // His throat bobbed. "I can't risk you." // The words slammed into her heart. (emphasis added)

and later,

"I have always been your friend Nesta. Always"

When Nesta and Cassian return from the Prison:

Nesta brushed her fingers against Cassian's in silent understanding. His own curled against hers, meeting her stare as if to say, See? We're the same after all.

But when Rhys suggests having Nesta dance with Eris, Cassian is territorial to the max

"You're not going to use her."

"Over my dead fucking body," Cassian exploded.

"Nesta hasn't agreed to anything," Cassian snapped. "Even one dance with that prick is too much --"

"I don't like it."

He also agrees to go with her to the cottage in the human lands, and is so damn supportive and kind to her there. Action not words here but I love this himbo so much

Cassian stood beside her through all of it. Not speaking, not touching. Just there, should she need him. Her friend -- whom she'd asked to come her with her not because he was sharing her bed, but because she wanted him here. His steadiness and kindness and understanding.

And of course, the amazing and wonderful solstice scene:

"I'm sorry for how I behaved last Solstice. For how awful I was."// "I know. I forgave you a long time ago."

"Because I was fucking jealous!" He roared, wings splaying. "You looked like a queen, and it was painfully obvious you should be with a princeling like Eris and not a low born nothing like me! Because I couldn't stand the sight of it, right down to my gods-damned bones."(emphasis added)

"You're not going to marry Eris." "No" "There will be no one else. For either of us." "Yes" "Ever."

The big ole fight

"Say what I've guess from the moment we met. What I knew the first time I kissed you. What became unbreakable between us on Solstice night"

"I am your mate, for fuck's sake!" "You are my mate! Why are you still fighting it?

"You promised me forever on Solstice," he said, voice breaking. "Why is one word somehow throwing you off that?" (emphasis added)

And the conclusion that just wasn't satisfying enough:

"What do you want? // "You" // "You've had me from the moment you met me."

[yazthebookish]

While I agree the 3 brothers x 3 sisters sounds a bit cliche, I can see Sarah doing it for the purpose of symmetry. And although I'm not a Elriel shipper, I can get by with that ship if Sarah goes through with it and it's done tastefully.

My issue, however, are the inconsistencies in the theories that contradict what's canon.

Elain requires sunshine and light... but being the HL of the Dusk Court, where it's the darkest of the night, is the exact opposite of that. Ironic, don't you think? Also, Nesta is the one with the 8 pointed star tattoo on her back.

Elain will be the light that drives out Azriel's shadows/darkness... but Azriel has stated his shadows will remain with him always. Why do people want him to get rid of his shadows? Because they don't dance for Elain the same way they do for a particular redhead so good riddance?

Elain is screaming to be seen and heard... but being a spy, which involves staying silent and hidden is the exact opposite of that. Let's not forget Azriel stated Elain should not be exposed to the troves after Elain offered to scry. But sure...he heard her alright.

Elain will reject the mating bond and choose Azriel. Their love will be based on choice and not some pre-destined bond. But somehow a true mating bond is highly possible?

Elain and Azriel will be a Hades and Persephone retelling...but that was already done for Feyre & Rhys.

I'm beginning to think some people who ship these two don't really know Elain at all. I mean, i can't blame them because Elain is an underdeveloped character but based off these theories and what we know is canon, I feel like part of this fandom is trying to mold Elain into someone she's not in order to fit into the love story they want. It's ashamed really because Azriel has his own issues which gets dismissed. While anything is possible, it's hard to keep up.

Hi anon,

I didn't ship Azriel with anyone. To be honest, I was indifferent to Elr*el back then. Yes I did think it would be cliche for them to end up together and I just hoped another love interest for Azriel would be introduced that perfectly compliments him (we got her, her name is Gwyn). It's the stans that ruined it for me.

• Dusk time is when night time starts to take over and the world falls into darkness. If it was Dawn, it would make more sense but Dawn, nope. Also, do you really see Azriel as a High Lord? Of all people? Even if he was offered the opportunity he would refuse it. Azriel isn't fit to rule. As you said, 8th Court plot likely belongs to Nesta as she is the one with the eight pointed star tattoo for a reason. Elain needs the light, she doesn't provide it.

• Nothing will drive out Azriel's shadows. They are an intrinsic part of him. Did they forget that the reason Azriel ever got out and dumped into a camp was because his father found out he was a Shadowsinger? Those shadows freed him. They look after him and like he said, they'd always be with him. There is no reason to erase one of the most important parts of Azriel just to make him more appealing for Elain. This is erasing his character.

• I really don't understand the whole Elain is a spy thing? Maybe for convenience because Azriel is a spy? Nuala and Cerridwen are spies too? But let's not forget that their main job is to be domestic helpers in the house. They're tertiary characters. But... is it a coincidence Elain is displaying spy characteristics around the time Briallyn claims she has spies in the Night Court hmm? And plus she's a seer, what would her being a spy serve? None of the IC will send her on spying mission and certainly not Azriel who would be very much against it.

• There is nothing true about a "true mating bond". It's either by choice or it's him being her true mate because the Cauldron chose wrong. Newsflash: mates are from birth, Lucien wasn't chosen as Elain's mate when she was turned, he has always been her mate just as Cassian and Rhysand sensed Nesta and Feyre could be their mates while they were human. Azriel's entitlement and overprotectiveness is what some would think a mate behavior but let's recall an earlier scene... remember when Azriel chose to go to the Hewn City and he and Cassian had to draw out sticks so the loser gets to stay in Velaris and guards the city and Elain? A mate's instinct is to protect their mate especially since Velaris was attacked not long ago. Feyre didn't even tell Lucien Elain's needs guarding because he won't stay away. If Elain chose Lucien it will be her choice still. Just as Feyre and Nesta chose their mates, they weren't forced to be with them yet somehow this is a problem with Elucien and Elucien can't get over the tension between them.

• ACOMAF was perfect I don't need a recycled version thank you very much. If there is a couple that fit the Light/Dark aesthetic it's Gwyn and Azriel. Gwyn is a priestess and she glows. If somehow which I think very unlikely because the text didn't offer much info on that, if she turns out to be a quarter Lightsinger that also fits with the Shadowsinger aesthetic. Elain is the embodiment of Spring and seeks the Light, whose name means Light and is the heir to the embodiment of the sun? Lucien.

So I agree. Azriel's issues and his healing journey is often dismissed and Elain is being molded into something that is not her.

[boxofbadaddiction]

A Likely Story

Fred Weasley x Reader

Warnings: Swearing.

This story is inspired from a request of my F.R.I.E.N.D.S Themed Prompt List.

Prompts: 9, 16 & 18

"They don't know that we know they know"

"DANGER!"

"What a small world./Yet I never run into Beyoncè"

"What'd you tell George?"

"Told him I had detention with Snape for setting off Dungbombs in his Second Years class."

"Hmm, very believable."

"That's because it's true."

"Why am I not surprised?"

"What'd you tell your mates?"

"Just said I was going for a walk."

"Guess that'll do. Remind me to give you some pointers on how to lie when we get back."

"Very funny."

Every word spoken echoed off the damp walls of the One Eyed Witch Passage as Fred and Y/n made their way through the dark tunnel. The only source of light being the soft glow emitting from the tips of their wands, allowing only enough visibility to see just infront of them as they walked.

The pair were currently sneaking from the Castle on a day which were not allocated for any Hogsmead Visitations. It were a school day. However, rather than sitting about the Castle grounds for the two free periods in their schedules, Fred had the brilliant idea of escaping the unbearable reign of Umbridge - even if only for a few hours, by taking a trip into town.

"You know they know, right?"

"Ahh, but they don't know that we know they know. Now do they?" Fred grinned as he shoved y/ns shoulder with his own playfully, before intertwining their cold fingers. "I fail to see how that matters" "makes it all the more fun." "Whatever makes you happy, Big Guy." "You mean, aside from you?"

Y/n rolled her eyes at his cheesiness, but smiled nonetheless. Stopping abruptly from a harsh tug at her hand, one that had her being pulled flush against Fred - chest to chest.

Threading his wand between his fingers, he brought his other hand to the back of y/ns neck and kissed her deeply.

The kiss left her flushed, biting her lip to suppress a giddy smile which naturally only caused a smug grin to appear on the face of her partner.

Sensing how inflated his ego was becoming y/n stepped back, shoving his chest, "Hurry up and get me out of here, loverboy, I'm freezing."

This wasn't the first time the two had been in a situation such as this. They had been in a relationship for quite a few months now but were keeping it secret - for the most part anyway, but they knew the others were suspicious.

There were several reasons why they felt their relationship needed to remain secret. One being for the fact Y/n were a Slytherin. Whom for as long as anyone could remember had despised the Weasleys, and vice versa. The second, and most crucial reason was due to y/ns family. She was a Y/l/n. A family who, like the Malfoys and LeStrange, were blood purists and for that matter hated Muggles, Muggleborns and Blood Traitors alike. A trait not inherited by that of the y/l/ns only daughter. Y/n.

After overcoming the years of conditioning by her parents; painting the Weasleys, anyone alike and Muggleborns as the enemy or lessers, she'd surrounded herself with friends of all houses and blood-status.

She even discovered there to be a remarkable amount of similarities between herself and that of the Redheaded family. Soon enough finding herself regularly in comfortable conversation with the Twins during their shared classes, after years of the ridiculous feud between them buried itself in the past. It then naturally didn't take long for her to start falling for the older, louder, Twin.

Though people acknowledged she were different to her family the pair were still hesitant about the reaction they'd receive being together in public, so they thought it best to keep to themselves. Which lead to a lot of sneaking around. Hence todays secret date in Hogsmead.

A few moments later Fred and Y/n reached the trap door of Honeydukes Cellar. Fred was the one to check the coast were clear. Smiling as he watched the owners feet retreating up the basements staircase to the store above. Piece of Cauldron Cake he thought. They silently slipped through the shop, completely unnoticed.

Glad to finally have the freedom to be with one another openly the two let out relieved breaths upon being met with the chilly fresh air of Hogsmead.

They happily strolled throughout the streets hand-in-hand going about their usual routine. A quick stop to The Three Broomsticks for a couple Butterbeers then off to what they'd deemed as "their spot", a clearing by the forest over looking the Shrieking Shack where they regularly met of a weekend for lunch and much needed time together.

Fred was spinning his girlfriend as if dancing as they walked, smiling, laughing and unashamedly flirting loudly as they did so.

The two were in a world of their own as they rough housed in the soft snow, throwing handfuls at one another. Unfortunately, blissfully unaware of the approaching complication in their secret rendezvous.

"Well, well, well." Came a cold voice from behind them, one which sent chills down y/ns spine - she would know that voice anywhere. Lucius Malfoy.

The teenagers turned with identical deadpan expressions to the man before them. "What a small world." "And yet I never run into Beyoncè" y/n countered sarcastically, her tone bitter and harsh.

"Whatever would one make of this, Hmm? A y/l/n fraternising with a Weasley..." Luicus eyed Fred with distaste, as if it were unsettling to simply be in his presence.

Fred stood tall and firm in place; a murderous glare thrown towards the arrogant man as he grit his teeth.

"One?" Y/ns brow raised in question, her voice drawing Malfoys attention back to her. He simply nodded in response, causing the girl to scoff as realisation struck. An exasperated smile tugging at her lips whilst she spoke, "Right. Going to rat me out to Daddy for having a friend, Lucius?" "But of course not." He took a step closer to the couple, "for being outside the grounds of Hogwarts, accompanied by an irresponsible and perpetually reckless boy however..." y/n swallowed harshly, a wave of fear coursing through her veins as her confidence faltered.

"Well, one might say it were my responsibility to report your little...adventure today. My, I can't begin to imagine the misfortune one might be subjected to less the High Inquisitor learn of such a blatant disregard for school protocols. Those for the offenders...or the Headmaster for that matter."

Y/n was silently panicking at these words. Dumbledore has already been on thin ice with the Ministry recently. If anyone finds out, well...that'd be the end of him.

"Of course however, y/n, you would be forgiven on account of your-" "Father." "-innocence, clearly under the manipulation of this one, whom would naturally be expelled." Lucius lazily waved his hand towards Fred. "You don't even know which Weasley 'this one' is." Y/n snapped. "Unimportant. I imagine Delores will be thrilled at the opportunity of finally ridding both from the school. And as for Dumbledore-"

"You're getting ahead of yourself, Malfoy." Fred finally spoke. Stepping forward to stand slightly infront of y/n protectively. His jaw and fists were clenched in rage, knuckles turning ghostly white under the strain in his grip. "Am I?" "Yes. To snitch on us you'd first need proof we were here in the first place." "You Weasleys truly are daft. I believe I have all the 'proof' I'll be needing. Given the fact you are stood right here before me, far from the saftey of the school grounds." "Are we?" Fred subtly reached for y/ns hand as he spoke, holding her palm tight behind his back, eyes staring directly into Malfoys challenging his dominance.

"Because I'm sure if you were to go to the Castle right now; I could be found with my brother and y/n here...undoubtedly studying in the Library." "Is that so?" Lucius had a rather done and ugly expression on his face at Freds antics, whom began smiling wickedly. Uttering a simple "yep." In response.

Their stare-off was broken as Fred glanced over Malfoys shoulder, raising his free arm to wave he greeted loudly, "Hello, Hagrid!" This causing the blonde man to turn in his direction. That was Fred's cue. Taking advantage of the moment and apparating the pair to the passage of the Shrieking Shack.

They took off running, hand-in-hand as they manoeuvred the winding tunnel to the school. Sprinting so quickly that even the Whomping Willow were too slow to react to their sudden appearance as they breached the grounds.

As they reached the, thankfully empty, courtyard they finally allowed themselves the opportunity to breathe and dropped the hold of one anothers hand. Fred swallowed thickly to ease the burning in his throat, "you have to-" "yeah. And you need to-" "yeah."

Exhausted and amused chuckles fell from their lips at the understanding shared between them. Placing one final, frantic, kiss to one anothers lips as goodbye they held each other close not wanting to let go. One of y/ns hands gripped Freds hair tightly whilst the other bunched in the fabric of his shirts collar. Both his hands placed securely on her waist. Y/n whines, knowing he won't be able to break the kiss himself, focusing all her strength she pushed from his chest, "Go" she whispered. Sighing frustratedly from the loss of his lips on hers he nods in agreement before both begin running in opposite directions.

Now thankful he had such a large family Fred was quickly successful in finding a family member to cling himself to. Barrelling down the corridor to where Ron and Harry were walking and conversing over whatever, with their backs to him. Overestimating the force of his current momentum he collided forcefully with the boys shoulders in attempt to steady himself, nearly toppling all three.

"What's your problem!?" Ron snapped angrily. "DANGER!" Fred whisper yelled, very out of breath. The scene brought a rather wide smile to Harrys face, watching as the Twin clutched his side painfully and tried to speak. "If-If anyone asks. I've been here the whole-WHOLE time. Okay!?" He was gesturing wildly between the three of them as he spoke, appearing desperate.

"Oh yeah? And what's in it for us?" Ron asked cockily. "For you, little Brother..." "anything?" He smiled smugly, earning a clap on the shoulder from his flustered older brother. "Not quite, Ronniekins."

Fred's eyes turned dark as he straightened himself, grip tightening on Rons shoulder like a vice. "Cover for me this time and you get to live another day." Ron was wincing at the pain being inflicted by the hold on his shoulder, "You-you can't do anything to me." Harry looked sceptical at this, it was Fred Weasley afterall.

"Can't I? It's a big Castle, Ronnie. Accidents happen." Fred's stare hadn't left Ron's eyes the whole time he spoke. A smirk forming on his face as if taking joy in the countless possibilities he had playing on his mind.

Noticing the poorly restrained fear spreading through his brother as Ron gulped thickly he lightened his grip knowing he's won.

"F-fine. Doesn't bother me anyway. Not like it's a huge inconvenience is it, Harry?" Ron tried to play the moment off cooly, though the panic was evident on his voice. "Not at all" Harry laughed but suddenly his expression soured. Looking forward to the entrance of the hall.

"Is that...Lucius?" The Weasleys heads turned to see the pale face of Malfoy striding towards them accompanied by Delores and...oh God. Freds blood ran cold.

"It is, and Titus Y/l/n! What are they doing here?" Ron growled.

"Danger. Danger. Danger." Fred mumbled from the side of his mouth, avoiding eye contact and looking quite nervous, though he played it off much better than his brother had. The boys looked up to him "You didn't..." they spat. Fred cleared his throat as a warning, and it worked just as well as a confession in Harry and Rons opinion, as the three adults approached.

"Potter." "Malfoy."

"Weasley." "Y/l/n."

"Eh-hem" the teens rolled their eyes. "Professor?"

"Tell me, Mr Weasley" she began, looking straight to Fred, "can you account for your whereabouts this afternoon?" "With these two."

"Where's your Twin?" Lucius rudely interrupted. "Haven't the foggiest. Since, ya know...I'm not with him." "It is strange" Umbridge began, "that you are without your Twin, seeing as how you are rarely to find one without the other." She giggled sickly. "Yeah, rarely. But not never."

At his words Lucius' expression became proud and more confident, turning to Delores now to speak. "He's the one. I'm sure of it." "The one what?"

"Enough of this. My daughter, where is she?" Titus interjects. "What...y/n? Stuffed if I know. Don't fancy myself much a snake charmer. What's with the interrogation?"

"Well it would seem, Mr Malfoy here has a rather interesting story to share on the topic of two seventh years strolling about Hogsmead not even an hour ago. A Weasley and-"

"My daughter. Where is she!?"

"I've already told you. I don't know!" Titus began advancing on Fred, rage burning clear in his eyes, "I'm warning you, Weasley. If you've in anyway involved yourself with y/n I will-"

"Dad?" A soft voice called from the end of the corridor. "Y/n." The girl looked around at the gathered group confusedly before stepping between Fred, Harry and Ron to embrace her Father in a quick greeting. "What are you doing here?" "Where have you been?" "Where-what? I've been-" "the Library perhaps?" Lucius raised a mocking brow. "What? No I-I was taking a walk by the Lake." "A likely story."

"Lucius here, tells me you were in Hogsmead with this boy." Titus gestures to Fred a venom held behind his voice.

Y/n looks over Fred with visible disgust, whilst he smiles coldly back. "Why on Earth would I ever surround myself with the likes of them?" She spits. Looking back to her Father as if highly insulted by his accusation.

Titus observes the interaction carefully as if watching for any weakness in their story. But he finds none. His expression softens as he turns back to his daughter completely. "I apologise, y/n/n. Lucius was obviously mistaken." He glares back over his shoulder to the blonde man who scoffs in response. "I would nev-" "Save it, Lucius." Titus growls. "But, Titus if I may, why would Mr Malfoy report this if it were not-" "you may not." The girls father puts an end to Umbridges interruption as she'd attempted to defend the other man. "I trust my daughter to know of the correct company to keep. Lucius was obviously mistaken and has by extension wasted my time."

Thankfully the adults were too busy bickering for anyone to notice the small smiles that threaten to break onto the faces of the gathered teenagers.

"I'm sorry, dear. I must be leaving now and I hope your studies are going well." "They are Dad, I'll write you and Mum tonight to fill you in on everything. Just as I always do." Y/n smiled. Titus pulled his daughter in for a final hug, placing a soft kiss to her forehead before turning to leave, with a last menacing glare to Delores and Lucius he walked away.

"Well. That will be all, the four of you off to your Common rooms immediately to prepare for dinner. Mr Malfoy if you'd follow me I'll escort you from the Castle." Umbridge spoke.

Harry and Ron couldn't contain their giggles at the insulted reaction shown by Malfoy as he turned to leave.

Lucius took one final look over his shoulder to the teens, who had not moved, being met with the taunting smile and small wave of y/n with Fred now standing confidently beside her.

Once finally out of sight the couple fell into hysterics, Fred wrapping an arm around y/ns shoulder as they laughed.

"What the bloody hell did you two do!?" Ron asked through a wide grin. "Just took a quick trip into town that's all..." "Safe to say our secrets out, Freddie." Y/n whispered to him as she noted all the students watching the group, paying particular attention to Freds arm around her. "Secret? You kidding! You two are the most obvious people on the planet!" Harry quipped. "George has been taking bets on how long it'll take for you two to just come out and admit it." "I know." Spoke Fred, "I had Colin Creevey place 7 Sickles on it for me." "You bet on us!?" "The odds were on my side! But thanks to Malfoy date-crashing I'm out of it now."

"About that, how did you two get back here so fast?" Ron questions.

"We apparated to The Shack then hauled ass." Y/n answered. "The pros of being 17" Fred winked, pulling y/n back into his chest, resting his chin atop her head. As his arms wrapped around her she nestled herself comfortably within his embrace with a lovestruck smile.

"Right well, as amusing as that was, this-" Ron guestured to the couple, "is gonna turn my stomach. And I'm starving so, Harry, coming to get ready for dinner?" the bluntness causing his best friend to roll his eyes with a chuckle. "Yeah alright. And I'll be sure to tell George all about this if we run into him along the way." Harry joked, waving to the couple as they walked towards the Gryffindor common room.

They stood there for a moment, contently basking in each others warmth before y/n turned in place to face her boyfriend with a cheekily grin. "So, still think I need tips on how to lie?" Fred clicks his jaw as he pretends to be deep in thought. Nodding slowly as he answers, "yeah, yep. Absolutely." "I just successfully dooped not only my Father but Delores fucking Umbridge! Okay? I deserve a frickin' gold star."

Fred can't help but laugh at her comment. "Alright, first of all. 'Dooped'? That is the least cool thing you've ever said. Secondly, you're so cute when you get all sassy. And unfortunately for you, I'm fresh out of gold stars...but I'll happily reward you for that semi-decent performance." Y/ns mouth falls open at the last words, "semi-decent!?" Fred nods innocently, "You sir, are a twat!" She states firmly as she pushes out of his arms making the redhead laugh loudly.

Taking a strong grip to her wrist as she begins to walk away he pulls her back to him, wrapping an arm around her waist as the other fists the hair at the nape of her neck pulling her lips into his.

The kiss is hard and passionate, as if he's trying to make up for their spoiled date in this one moment. And it's working, fireworks erupt within y/ns chest as goosebumps spread over her skin and she can't help the soft moans that sound from her throat. It's perfect.

Fred smiles as he rests his forehead against hers, feeling like he's drunk an entire Cauldron of love potion. "You were brilliant today, love." He whispers. "Fred, that kiss was...wow." he hums in response. "I still want the star though." she goads making him roll his eyes and throw his head back in exasperation. She can feel the silent laughter radiate through his body as she holds him close bringing her head to rest against his chest.

Freds arms hold y/n tighter as he lets out a comfortable sigh, placing his head atop of hers. Eyes softly closing in complete bliss. As fun as all the sneaking around was he could get used to this. Holding her when, where and for as long as he wants? To Fred, that sounds exactly like Heaven.

[minkmousesworld]

HI BESTIE....I RETURN AFTER WHAT FEELS LIKE CENTURIES.... im glad i can finally sit down and write to u again i missed u bro </3

THERES NOTHING TO WITNESS FOR I AM NOT SUSPICIOUS!!

hell yeah he was <3 zenitsu carries the burden of stocking thirst on his shoulders like atlas holding the sky

ADFGDDFHA imagine how frustrated the poor Lamia would be if you just did NOT get all the hints about mating. They ask if you'd like to see their really long tongue, and you bounce on your feet at the opportunity to see it..literally. you're looking at it for science. The Lamia asks any companions they have what they're doing wrong because they wrapped their tail around you and you just cuddled further into it! you didn't do anything?? poor lamia is at a complete loss lmao

actually, alternatively: pls consider a lamia who was raised predominantly by humans, but still keeps the majority of their instincts, so not even they know why they're doing all this. They just know they feel really good to have you wrapped in their tail, that you're the only person they'd trust to help with their shed, and that they can't help flicking their tongue against your skin sometimes. They're just following what feels good to them, and even tho it's a little weird to have those urges by human standards, you're accepting of their monster nature.

natural lamia lover progression: hand holding, first kiss, first shed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

ok sorry different idea but consider: yknow your recent content with pet puppy tanjirou?? that kind of thing with a lamia!! where you have a dear pet Lamia who suddenly finds themselves seeing their master/mistress in a very different way and don't know how to handle it. They seem to get a lot more clingy, and their tail is noticeably more reactive to your touch. You can't even seem to shed your poor Lamia anymore... they intentionally lock themselves away so they can take care of it themselves, since they're sure that if you did it they'd accidentally blurt out their feelings and beg you to mate with them in the heat of the moment. Maybe you get tired of your Lamia being so stubborn for what you think is no reason, and find a way to unlock whatever room they're hiding in so you can finally help them actually shed again. Lamia ends up getting so sensitive that they cling to you, shaking like a leaf the whole while, and beg that you please take care of them </3

fair enough!! dont worry dear i make sure im in good health! ( •̀ ᴗ •́ )و make sure you watch out for your own health too ok??

-monster anon

welcome back, sunshine!!! ♡♡ I've missed you, too(っ˘ω˘ς )

I RETURN AFTER WHAT FEELS LIKE CENTURIES

it sounds like something very fun /j

im glad i can finally sit down and write to u again i missed u bro </3

awww <333 adorable bun♡♡♡

THERES NOTHING TO WITNESS FOR I AM NOT SUSPICIOUS!!

EVERYONE SUSPICIOUS SAYS SO

SUS

You have no proof of your innocence!( : ˘ ∧ ˘ : )

hell yeah he was <3 zenitsu carries the burden of stocking thirst on his shoulders like atlas holding the sky

when one says "stockings", the millons will say "zenitsu" </3

but he has his hips and legs too good for that to be untrue <3

ADFGDDFHA imagine how frustrated the poor Lamia would be if you just did NOT get all the hints about mating. They ask if you'd like to see their really long tongue, and you bounce on your feet at the opportunity to see it..literally. you're looking at it for science. The Lamia asks any companions they have what they're doing wrong because they wrapped their tail around you and you just cuddled further into it! you didn't do anything?? poor lamia is at a complete loss lmao

They are so confused. Of course, humans and lamias are different species, but you don't have to be so different. They brought you food and beautiful glasses! Why don't you react in any way? What do you people consider courtship?

They even danced in front of you!

Why is it so difficult? ( ；∀；)

... But at the same time, you understand that they are kind of courting you, but maybe this is just their way of being friendly? Bonus points if your relationship was strained at first, and now you think that this is how they are trying to apologize.

Or is it courtship?

Ugh, this is so difficult (눈‸눈)

actually, alternatively: pls consider a lamia who was raised predominantly by humans, but still keeps the majority of their instincts, so not even they know why they're doing all this. They just know they feel really good to have you wrapped in their tail, that you're the only person they'd trust to help with their shed, and that they can't help flicking their tongue against your skin sometimes. They're just following what feels good to them, and even tho it's a little weird to have those urges by human standards, you're accepting of their monster nature.

please. lamias who don't know why they do it themselves, but you seem to react so sweetly, so they give their instinct freedom and at some point wrap themselves around you in such a way that the difference in your height becomes ideal for a kiss while they snuggle up to you.

or a lamia who is so confused and excited that they want to squeeze you, and think that this is a sign of aggression, until the older lamia explain to them what it means that they want to "wrap their tails" with you♡

⁄(⁄ ⁄•⁄ω⁄•⁄ ⁄)⁄ "flicking their tongue against your skin sometimes" ara ara *horny sigh*

natural lamia lover progression: hand holding, first kiss, first shed ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

imagine that you live in a world where people coexist with lamia (and maybe with other creatures), and you are forced to help lamia with their shedding (nothing too intimate, but it was definitely exciting); but you could not imagine that later they would grab your hand and with a red face demand that you take responsibility, since you saw their naked tail during the shedding </3

Bonus points if you work as a doctor for lamia, and more bonus points if lamia is Zenitsu </33

ok sorry different idea but consider: yknow your recent content with pet puppy tanjirou?? that kind of thing with a lamia!! where you have a dear pet Lamia who suddenly finds themselves seeing their master/mistress in a very different way and don't know how to handle it. They seem to get a lot more clingy, and their tail is noticeably more reactive to your touch. You can't even seem to shed your poor Lamia anymore... they intentionally lock themselves away so they can take care of it themselves, since they're sure that if you did it they'd accidentally blurt out their feelings and beg you to mate with them in the heat of the moment. Maybe you get tired of your Lamia being so stubborn for what you think is no reason, and find a way to unlock whatever room they're hiding in so you can finally help them actually shed again. Lamia ends up getting so sensitive that they cling to you, shaking like a leaf the whole while, and beg that you please take care of them </3

it's not that you're rude or violating their personal space, but they can't shed on their own, their tail is too sensitive and slowly loses old skin.

you both know this, and when your stubborn lamia says that they can do it on their own, you think that this is just a manifestation of their "wild" trait, like maturation. but they don't take food for almost a week, they stay alone, they don't react to the name and sometimes they moan painfully, and you get very worried.

but when you find yourself in a hot and humid room, they immediately jump on you, as if they were waiting for you to appear, and rub against you, whimpering and trying to get rid of their old skin, but any attempt by you to move and help them is met with a growl and even more squeezing of your body.

this will definitely be the most intense shedding, especially when you realize that they are entering the mating season as a mature lamia who needs to have cubs.

warnings: mention of pregnancy

but also, listen. you are just lying in the nest / bed with your beloved.

you talk about some nonsense, then you start talking about the future and they say carelessly and playfully, "oh, don't worry! I'm already half pregnant with your cubs, so I don't think that according to human standards of morality, you can go somewhere."

and you freeze, because, well, you only had petting / you definitely used protection.

and then they explain to you that since your "genetic material" fell on their naked tail during arousal, it is quite natural that they can get pregnant from you at any time on their own.

"lamias rarely live together in nature and even less often tolerate each other if they are not family or partners, but we must somehow reproduce without meeting each other."

"so that... I'm half pregnant with you now, [Y/n]. You should take responsibility (⁄ ⁄◡⁄ω⁄◡⁄ ⁄)"

And you don't know whether you need to feel amazement, admiration or even horror.

fair enough!! dont worry dear i make sure im in good health! ( •̀ ᴗ •́ )و make sure you watch out for your own health too ok??

Awwe~ I'll try, but I can't promise anything </3 /j

Don't forget to drink water and remind yourself how adorable you are♡

[babylooneytoonz]

Warning(s): Are they back to bickering again? Like an old married couple ? Bucky Barnes gets a surprise.

Please read the other parts of this book using links from the Masterlist.

Three more months later,

(Six months ever since you left the Avengers Facility)

Bucky lowered his cap, and so did Natasha, Steve, Clint and Sam as they pushed their way through a swarm of drunk college kids that were dancing to a loud, buzzing electronic music.

"All these years, and I still don't get how this is even good. Buck and I can tell you how a good clubbing was done, back in the 1940s– " Steve was screaming on the top of his lungs.

"God, this is giving me a goddamn headache, why are we here again?" Bucky raised a brow, and fixed a cold, impassive glare on Sam.

"I was born on this day. I have the right to call the shots." Sam pointed out, and Natasha just grinned, her body almost swaying to the beats that were playing.

"God, at least they have drinks. Come on punk. I think the only place the two of us can be is the bar." Bucky nudged Steve and Sam just rolled his eyes while he and Natasha started dancing, Natasha rolling her hips in a seductive way while Sam was just sort of moving his hands.

Bucky, Clint and Steve walked up to the bar and they fixed themselves in a corner, their eyes scanning around as Clint smirked, "Come on, loosen up, grandpa's. What are we drinking?"

"I'm not drinking– "

"We'll have the four roses bourbon– "

Both Bucky and Steve spoke at the exact same time, and Bucky narrowed his eyes as he looked at his best friend, "Really? You people drag me out here and we're not even drinking ?"

"Buck, what's the whole point of drinking when we can't even get drunk?" Steve just shrugged, while Bucky just shook his head.

"It's better than nothing."

"Well I can't win from you. Let's do it. Although I'm not sure I even heard about that before," Steve chuckled and pulled a barstool, so he could fix himself on it as Clint spoke to the bartender.

The bartender placed the drinks on the counter, and Bucky curled his flesh fingers around his drink, lifting it up and placing it to his lips, his eyes watching Natasha and Sam, as they made their way towards them.

"Not fair? You started without us, Cap." Natasha smirked at Steve, and leant against the counter so she can throw in her words to the bartender, telling him what she wanted to drink. Sam just made his way closer to the men, standing next to Clint and slowly turning towards three girls that were standing by the dance floor, their drinks in their hands, but their eyes were on them.

"Well check that out. I call dibs on the one in green. Damn." Sam smirked, and Steve just shook his head in disapproval, and brought his drink up to his lips, while Clint smirked and rubbed his palms together, "Nah, I'm good mate. You can have her. I have a good one back home."

"Hey, she is looking at you man." Sam nudged Bucky's knee using his elbow and he just rolled his eyes in the most casual manner and turned his head to listen to what Sam had to say, when his eyes fell on one of the girls, who was biting her lip, staring at him. Disinterested, he just turned away; back into his drink, staring at the glass when Natasha just blurted out, regretting her words immediately, "lover boy's just waiting for Y/N to come back, bring him the hottest woman on earth now, he would still want her back."

Bucky's grip tightened on the glass, and instinctively, Steve grabbed his flesh arm, to hold him back before he could lose his control and do something he would later regret.

"Barnes, I didn't mean it," Natasha immediately added.

"You women often say things that you never mean, which is why I don't bloody understand the things that goes on in those minds of yours," Bucky brought up his index finger, placing it on Natasha's temple, tapping it twice.

The lot fell silent then, each of them now lost in their own trivial thoughts. Bucky replayed the conversation he had with you in your apartment, and how you had said that you didn't mean it. He just scoffed, and shook his head, a little too obviously and Steve started looking at him, noticing his friend's sudden weirdness before his phone beeped in his pocket and he pulled it out. "Great, Tony wants us back at the towers. Someone hacked into two of the HYDRA bases systems in Kazakhstan and Hungary. It was live for two minutes before they took it off, but Tony managed to get his hands on a few cryptic codes and coordinates." Steve stood up, his broad, bulky frame almost blocking out the lighting behind him, as he slid his phone back into his pocket.

"Well, it couldn't have been the government, or CIA. Does Tony know the potential hacker?" Clint raised an eyebrow, and Natasha crossed her arms over her chest.

"Couldn't be traced. But again, if we can figure out those cryptic codes and coordinates, we will have a lead." Steve called out before turning around to leave.

╞═════𖠁𐂃𖠁═════╡

"Romanoff, you get anything?" Tony called out, while Natasha just grunted in annoyance, not even bothering to crane her neck to look back from one of the computer screens, as her fingers skillfully glided across the keypad, typing here and there. Bucky leant by the wall, eyeing Steve's computer screen, watching him intently as he was struggling to turn the cryptic symbols into something meaningful.

"Bingo, I think I have it," Natasha yelled, and immediately, the four of them flocked around her screen, staring down at the brightly lit screen.

"Eighth Avenue, Tech Laboratories?" Bucky mumbled, his eyes squinted slightly as he leaned over Natasha's back, typing something onto the computer so that the maps came up.

"But those labs have been shut down ages back, illegal animal testing and shit." Tony replied, in a casual tone and Steve just bit his lip.

"That's the whole point, Tony. Whoever this is, whatever is going on, it's illegal, which is why there's this shade."

"Guys I hate to break it to you, the more we stay here talking, we might end up missing whatever is going on out there," Natasha deadpanned giving them a serious look, and Steve nodded.

It didn't take them very long to reach the old, abandoned laboratories that looked stale and dinghy in comparison to the other buildings surrounding it. It was weird and confusing why this building hadn't been taken down yet. Another thing to notice was, that the building, although miniscule, the empty land that was in the boundary of this building was massive, and yet secluded.

Bucky and Steve stepped off their bikes, while Natasha got off hers, with Sam riding pillion behind her. Their hands flew to their gun holsters and immediately, they drew out their guns. Their eyes fell on a black sedan that was parked a few meters away; and they knew that whoever this was, was probably still inside. Steve's index finger flew to his lips, as the four of them, with quiet steps starting making their way into the building, their eyes scanning the vicinity for anything that was off.

"Do we split up or – " Sam begin but Bucky have him a glare, and he pressed his lips shut, " my bad."

The four of them walked in deeper, noticing an intense change in the heat level inside as compared to the outside. The inside of the laboratories were freezing, and it felt like they were inside a freezer. Climbing a flight of stairs, making sure they didn't press much weight to the stairs, not wanting the stairs to announce their arrival, they stepped onto the first floor, and reflexively, they stopped, when they heard a familiar voice.

"Well, does everything look okay to you?"

Natasha's head snapped towards Steve in recognition, and his eyes widened, his own head snapping towards Bucky.

"Hey, why the fuck does the voice sound like Fury?" Sam whispered in Bucky 's ear.

"Because it's Fury, Sam."

Before Sam could speak, another voice reached their ears, and this voice was foreign, and unknown.

"Mr. Fury, this is something unlike I've ever seen. Those cells are multiplying at a rate faster than a normal human growth rate. These bruises, these bruises you see aren't something very common for a six month old fetus, yes they kick and all, but this is– "

"Holy shit, Fury probably knocked up a girl. Boy I think we are just at the wrong place at the wrong–  " Sam began whispering again, much to the annoyance of the others. They all turned towards him at the exact same time, ready to shut him up when a soft, feminine voice started speaking; a voice all of them were aware of.

"Did Erskine's serum cause any damage to my baby?"

James Buchanan Barnes turned white like a chalk. His eyes and his mouth were frozen wide open, in an expression of shock, and although he was staring straight at Steve; he appeared not to notice him at all, and all he could think of was what he had just heard. Steve took his best friend's side, placing his palm softly on his bicep, slightly shaking him out of his daze. Whoever that third person was, had probably left by now, and from what they could hear; it was just Fury and Y/N inside.

"I know you want to go and pull those motherfuckers out of their shitholes, Y/N, I really know you do, but right now, they are going to come after you and try to get their hands on that kid."

"And you think I'd let them ? I'd break every single bone in their bodies. Those pesky rodents, they deserve to be wiped off, you know it," You hissed, through pursed lips, unaware that a set of four eyes were now watching you and Fury from the corner. You were sitting on what looked like a gurney, your feet dangling off the edge. A loose fitting shrug was covering your shoulders, your palms cradling your pretty evident baby bump.

"I'm tired of dealing with your stubborn ass. This is the time to stay hidden."

"I am not going to do anything stupid Fury, not until this little guy's here," You hopped off the gurney, and ran your fingers through your hair, using your shrug to try and hide the bulge of your belly, before you looked towards the back entrance.

"Call me later, I'm gonna use that back door and get the hell out of here."

"Whatever, snarky," Fury smirked.

"Don't get started," you warned, making your way out through the back, your gun resting securely in the waist of your stretchable pants.

Nick Fury waited a few seconds until he had made sure that you had gotten out safely from the back. He then turned around, and casually started walking out; only to come face to face with four semi to super pissed Avengers.

"Fury," Steve was the first one to break the silence; and sensing that the four had probably heard it all, Fury lost the defensiveness in his stance and took a deep breath.

"Yeah, I didn't tell any of you because she didn't want me to," he was eyeing Bucky now, who had a tight squared jaw.

"How long have you known?" He raised an eyebrow, stepping in front of Steve.

"She came to me three months back, didn't know where else to go." He stopped speaking for a split second and then, in a low voice, almost grumbled under his breath, "I told her it is always a bad idea to hook up with a colleague; look where it landed her. First, it got her married to a fucking HYDRA dick, and second, it got her pregnant with a super soldier's spawn. When does she ever listen? And you, don't even get me started. You were the bastard that knocked her up."

"Come on, Fury. That's just harsh," Natasha chimed in.

"Guys, can I talk?"

Steve, Fury, Bucky and Natasha turned towards Sam and they gave him a quizzical expression, while Bucky just glared at him.

"The thing is, those coordinates, that hacked details, what the hell was that?"

Fury's eyes widened and he clenched his fists tighter against his side, stepping closer towards Sam, "What coordinates? What hacking?"

"It looked like someone hacked into the HYDRA system, we found these coordinates, and that's why we found out the secrets that you were hiding Fury," Natasha defended Sam immediately, as she winked playfully at Bucky. This is when Fury suddenly turned, pulling out his gun, and began sprinting towards the back entrance; as quickly as his legs could carry him, bolting down the lab.

"Where the hell are you going?" Bucky followed his pace with his own grueling pace, managing to reach him in a split second, and so did the other three.

"Those hackers weren't hacking from HYDRA. It was most probably HYDRA getting into our systems, the non official ones, to find her. They've landed on a jackpot, a freaking Winter Soldier baby. And if what you're saying is true, they're here already, and Y/N is probably in trouble."

Meanwhile, this wasn't supposed to happen, not again.

No one knew of this place, then who were these men?

You slowly slid your palm into your shrug, pulling out your loaded gun. You were pregnant, but you definitely weren't a damsel in distress, and if need arose, you were going to fight the HYDRA scum. Your mind was already working on the calculations; there were four of them, and maybe, there were more. They had a plus one on you, but yet, you had an edge. They couldn't hurt you, if what they really wanted was your child.

"Никто не должен умирать. Пожалуйста, пойдем с нами, и мы не причиним тебе вреда." One of them stepped towards you, and instinctively you stepped one step back, raising your gun in the air, until you were in a face off.

"Sorry, gentlemen, I don't do Russian, my mum did nag me to learn it, but unfortunately, I never did. Can we switch to good ol' English now?" You hissed, venom in your voice.

"Miss Y/N. Let's not do that, shall we? One squeeze of a trigger from either you or my men, it's going to be a disaster," the man spoke in thick Russian accent, and you rolled your eyes, trying to look through this man's mask. This was where you made a mistake. They had orders not to kill you, but not to not hurt you. You dropped your guard for one second when this man spoke, but just when this happened, the bullet from another man's gun hit you right on your palm and your gun dropped; clattering to the ground with a loud noise, leaving your palm in a stinging, burning pain, blood spurting out of the hole the bullet had made right in the center.

In that frozen second between the stand off you saw the man's eyes flick from you to your belly and a faint nod passed between him and his men, a sort of a signal. Your faces are unreadable, no fear, no invitational smirk, just plain hatred in your eyes, and passiveness in his. One of them suddenly lunged forward, when your reflexes kicked in, and you immediately ducked, this proving to be much more difficult now. You threw out your leg, kicking the man hard in his shins until he hit the floor hard with the blow, when another one lunged at you, trying to grab you.

Punches, kicks, hard blows.

You had lost to them once, and had been unable to protect your son, but this time, you were not planning on letting history repeat. You were going to fight, for your life, and you were going to protect this child, no matter what it took.

          ╞═════𖠁𐂃𖠁═════╡

The four men and one woman soared through the hallway at the back, their guns blazing as they ran towards the back entrance from where you had just left, minutes back. Gunshots rang out from all around them now, which meant that Fury was right; HYDRA was here and you were in danger. Bucky could feel his heart beat in his chest, pounding, banging, trying to get out. He kept running forward and ahead of the others, feeling as though his blood were on fire. His limbs were moving on their own. He was disconnected from everything but the ever present sound of his drumming heart as he kicked the back door with his foot, watching it fly off its hinges and land a distance away with a crash.

The first thing their eyes fell on were the black uniformed corpses that were spread out evenly on the floor; two with a bullet mark, and two who had a gruesome bite on the side of the neck and the other one probably having had snapped his neck. But within seconds, Natasha's eyes had spotted you in a corner, sitting against the floor, your head resting against the wall at the back, your bleeding hand pressed against your chest.

Your eyes were open, your mind was awake and alert, but the adrenaline of it all was too much. You felt liberated, and free, that finally, you had managed to something you had failed in. You had, for now, saved yourself. And it was all on you.

The rest of the Avengers crowded around you, Natasha kneeling next to you as she shook you gently, her voice soft against your ears, "Are you okay? You took them out yourself?"

"Yea, I'm peachy."

Your smirk reached your eye, and everyone, including Bucky, gave you a smile back; they were all relieved. You placed your palms on the floor, in an attempt to pull yourself back up when Bucky suddenly stepped forward, leaning over you.

Your eyes met his, the second his eyes were face level with yours. The blue in his eyes looked bluer than the ocean. Six months, and you had forgotten how beautiful this man was, how beautiful, yet how broken. You placed your arm around his neck, a mutual understanding passing between the two of you, and the minute he sensed that you were securely latched to his shoulder, his metal arm held you from your waist, pulling you up to your feet until you were back up.

"Buck, we should all get back. Before they come back in more force," Steve commented, breaking the moment between the two of you.

"Well, this was nice," you drawled, absentmindedly, your hand flying up to your frenzied hair as you started curling your index finger against one of the strands. "I should leave."

"The only place you're going now is the Avengers Towers," Bucky crossed his arms over his chest, looking down at you.

"Did I ask you? You don't have a say in this."

"Jesus, not the two of you again." Natasha sighed, in a frustrated way, running her hands through her hair as she walked off.

"Well, that's my kid in there. I won't take a no. Now, you can voluntarily choose to come with me, back where you should be or–" He took a step closer to you, his face bent slightly so he was glaring into your eyes, not with anger, but with a look of determination.

"Or, what?"

"I'll lift you up and carry you there myself."

Permanent Bucky Barnes Taglist :

@really-dont-forget-it

@thepeakygurl

@all-art-is-quite-useless

@baumarvel

@janajjj

@chipilerendi

@nyotamalfoy

@skittychat

@allidoiswritewritewrite

Want to be added to my taglist? Please fill up a form on this link. 💗

[iamdorka]

The making of the new album

I wanted to post this hours ago but the wifi at the train station decided to be a bitch so I try to post it now. If it gets posted two times please love this one more, okay? 🙈

So as the release of his new album is closer and closer I decided to write something about it. Hope you will like it.

The making of the new album (headcanon)

- He was really excited about this one, because after opening about the demons in his head in Hotel Diablo on this one he really could show his true passion, every piece of it, without any restriction. He just kept pushing himself towards his truest self and you had to admire that, because his work was his life. Also he worked with some of the finest artist (including literally your heroes from your childhood and that got you even more excited if it was even possible).

- He loved when you were around in the studio even if you had nothing to do with music, your presence calmed him down even in his darkest moments. He needed that firm point in his life, he needed you.

- And you loved being there with him because even if listening to music, pretending you are sometimes Beyonce or other time the fearless frontgirl of a rockband like Hayley Williams was your only way engaging with music, seeing him creating his vision with his mates gave you a whole new understanding of literally everything. He was able to show you new things even after 2 years being in a relationship with him and you loved him for it, lived for it.

- You saw him at his lowest but also the highest point while creating this masterpiece and you were with him all along. You supported him and it meant the world to him, you knew it. He showed you that with words, with cute little actions.

- Yeah, you have to admit that sometimes it was a bit too much and it was hard for you to accept everything not that you should’ve accept everything. Even if you knew that he was working on a precious piece of his soul you weren’t blind. You saw that he was suffering inside. He needed to do this but the ache in your heart still was there it was really frightening sometimes.

- This creative process was a roller coaster for everybody. For him and for you too.

- He was overworking himself and sometimes he didn’t even notice it, which hurt you even more because half of your soul was him and seeing him like that was terrible. After creating and living in Hotel Diablo you knew it would come to this but really living it was different.

- You spent a lot of time alone too because he was on his feet 24/7 and slowing down never was an option for him. Yeah you knew that he was in love with music (beside you) but it still hurt like hell when you just couldn’t find him next to you when you needed him, when you were expecting him to be there.

- Even if you were with him in the last 2 years you still couldn't humanly imagine how he could manage being up and awake ALL THE TIME. Oh yeah... you knew how he could do that but you preferred not to think about it. He knew that his health wasn't at its peak and that you were mad at him because of it. He didn't accept worries from nobody... but you were different. Cliche or not.

- Sometimes but nowadays most of the time you just wanted to slap his beautiful face to beat some sense into him even if you knew it was a mission impossible. But not just he was who needed his other half... you needed him too and didn't want to lose him, not in a million years.

- The day when he finally showed the finished album to his label he wanted you to be there with him but your boss thought otherwise because he sent you to San Francisco the day before for a 2 day job. Your heart ache because you really wanted to be there with him and even if he didn't admit it he was a little but disappointed too.

- So you did everything humanly possible to get the work done in the shortest imaginable time, that's how you ended up on a train at 4am without getting any sleep just to get back in time to Los Angeles to be with him. He didn't know anything about it.

- You didn't even get home, you just cought an uber and with your suitcase and everything you were headed to Interscope.

- The only person who knew about your surprise appearance was Slim and he knew if he told anything to Colson you would gladly kill him with your bare hands without even thinking or blinking.

- You never got out of a car this fast because you got there exactly 5 minutes before them. (It was 10am and having Colson up at this time was a miracle to begin with but you did your own miracle too to be there on time.)

- 'I thought I will have to show them myself the album. You are late' when he entered the floor where the conference room was, you waited him there casually sitting on the couch not showing that it was hard even to breathe for you because you had to be that fast and you just fell to the couch a minute before. You tried to play it cool so you did.

- Not even saying a word as you stood up he brought you in his arms and hugged you like he hadn't seen you in ages. He had his girl with him.

- 'Am I dreaming?' he kissed your cheek as he let himself see your smiling face. For a brief moment he forgot why he was in that building.

- 'I know I'm your dream girl... but no, you are not.' you answered him smiling, biting your lip as you laced your fingers together not engaging in any pda because first: you two hated that, second: you had company and he had work to do, important work. 'But maybe I'm... because I haven't slept in the last 48 hours and I'm running on like 4 coffees' you murmured and when Slim gave you your new coffee you corrected yourself taking a sip from it. 'five and counting... '

- 'Good luck. I'M PROUD OF YOU AND I LOVE YOU' you told this to his lips as you sat down on the couch and he took his seat at the end of the big conference table. Everyone was ready, more than ready.

- He was living his best life and your heart was full of love watching him because he was enjoying every moment of this. He could not stop moving, you could see that he was already feeling himself at the live shows and he proved that too because he even got on the table dancing, rocking his soul to his new goodies.

- It really got your heart beat faster and even if you realised that some of the people didn't really appreciate your boyfriend that much, you couldn't care less because you could see how proud he was of his work. Sweat and blood. It was his, the best one yet.

- You even recorded him dancing on the table because it was the funniest shit ever and you knew his fans would appreciate it later. And you loved feeding them with quality content.

- When the presentation was over he could not hold himself back because when you stood up, wanting to congratulate him again (after all the other people) he picked you up and he was spinning with you not letting you to touch the ground. He was in an euphoric state and he didn't hide him.

- 'You are my world. Thanks for being here' he murmured to your neck and finally he put you down.

- 'I really am proud of you' you repeated yourself and you were glad Slim got closer to you as the people in the room started chatting about everything what was coming.

- 'You got it?' you asked him and he nodded without a word.

- 'Got what?' Colson asked cluelessly looking at you both.

- 'Nothing.' you replied as you asked him for his phone. 'But you just held yours a minute ago' he stated the truth. 'But I want... yours.' You asked politely again and he did finally what you asked him and without even thinking you gave immediately Slim the phone.

- 'Okay... I don't understand you. What are you up to?' he asked smirking at you.

- 'You... and me are up to catching a flight. You can't say no because I will handcuff you to me if you start to rebel. We are going on a little vacation right now.'

- 'You need this bro' Slim stated too watching as you didn't let Colson's hand from yours. 'I already fought with her because of this... and I didn't even have the slightest chance either... nor have you, so... just accept it'

- 'You really have a handcuff with you?' he asked the right question.

- 'Just bought a new pair in San Francisco, to make sure everything would be fine' he threatened him but you were sure that he would even enjoy if you used it right there and then.

- 'Ohh... it will be more than fine' he looked at you with the hungriest smirk on his lips.

- 'Please... get a room or whatever, but catch your flight because I think I'm gonna throw up in my mouth if I have to be with you two two more seconds' Slim said and you already were stealing the star of the moment leaving the place as fast as you arrived there.

- Maybe he had other plans, maybe the others did too but with the help of your very good friends you made sure everything would be okay. They agreed that he deserved this getaway before everything was coming and A LOT was coming. He needed that recharge and so did you.

- You managed to rent a beach house probably in the middle of nowhere and that place was exactly what you two needed. No internet, no people just the two of you and the calming sound of the ocean.

- Yeah, both of you were and still are the people who can't really sit in a place for more than a minute, because you had to do something but once in a while it was good just to... be. Because you just bought 'tickets to my downfall' and before all the craziness you had to remind him that he is a human being and if he loses his power he could not spread the energy to anybody else... not even himself.

Tag list (write me if you wanna be on it❤)

@no-shxt-sherl @kiss-yall @bakerkells @backoftheroomandnotbelonging @mgk-rooklover1997 @just-a-normal-fangirl18 @southernmgkpunk @thegunnerkelly @findingmyth @painkillerash @rosesinmars @rosegoldrichie @pinksocktingz @itjustkindahappenedreally @cclynn88 @bluehairedtracii

[sirrriusblack]

Prompt(its probably wierd so u don't necessarily need to do it) Remus does bad on a test (actually bad,please don't let it become good in the end) and sirius/marauders/lily (whoever u r comfortable with) talk or do something to comfort him Maybe this could be jily if u don't wanna write wolfstar

I loved writing this, thank you!!

PS: I had no intention of making it this long, but here we are :)

* * *

Remus’ POV:

“What’d you get?” James asked as we made our way back to the common room. James’ face was lit up, a big, loud grin adorning his face. He’d gotten 100 percent on the transfiguration test we’d had. James had every right to be proud, he’d studied to no end. The only problem I had was that I’d also studied just as much, and I’d gotten 17 percent. I’d failed the test. It wasn’t like I’d gotten on the verge of failing and passing either—no, I was nowhere near passing. 17 percent. But the boys didn’t need to know that. I forced a small smile to my face, hoping it was convincing enough.

“83,” I lied through my teeth. Pete clapped me on the back. The four of us had just finished transfiguration, our last class for the day. Sirius had linked his hand in mine the moment we’d left class.

“Well done mate,” Womtail said. I nodded, wanting to just get alone for a moment. Sirius and I locked eyes, and I dropped his hand and quickly looked away from the concern in his eyes.

“Oh, I forgot, I need to go to the library to grab a book. I’ll be back.” I turned and made to walk away before Sirius chimed in.

“I’ll come with you!” he smiled, taking a step closer. I wanted nothing more than for him to come with me, to tell him about the test, to have him talk me down from the downwards spiral I was falling into. But it was just a stupid test. I’d get over it.

“No, uh… I’ll be fine thanks.” I muttered, just needing a moment to myself, to calm down, to gather my thoughts. Sirius’ brows furrowed and he took another step toward me, causing me to take one back.

“I’ve gotta grab a book too though, it’s fi—”

“No.” I knew I was being unfair—being stupid, really—but I’d worked my ass off on this test and, well, a fail was just like a massive blow to the gut. “Sorry,” I said, and walked away.

I didn’t go to the library—I wasn’t planning on it in the first place. I didn’t necessarily know where I was expecting to end up, but it definitely wasn’t outside of Professor McGonagall’s office. I was about to turn away when the door opened and a first year Gryffindor walked out, a biscuit in her hand. I smiled at her when she looked up at me and I tried not to notice as she took in the scars on my arms and neck.

“Mr Lupin do come in,” McGonagall called out from where she sat at her desk. I smiled again at the kid as she walked away, and, seeing no way out if this, I closed the door behind me as I stepped into the office. “How can I help you?” the professor asked once I’d taken a seat across from her. I swallowed my nerves and lifted my eyes to meet hers.

“I was wondering if I could talk to you about the score I received on the test today?” McGonagall’s eyes softened as she looked at me and a wave of—of emotion hit me. I hated that I was here, about to grovel to a teacher about some stupid test score that bothered me for absolutely no reason but my pride.

“Ah, yes,” Professor McGonagall started before I could make an excuse to leave. “What would you like to talk about?” she asked, her hands clasped together on the desk in between us.

“I was—could I possibly retake the test?” I blurted out before I could think about it. Maybe—maybe if I re-did it I’d miraculously pass. I doubted it. And I knew I’d never find out when I saw the pity in McGonagall’s eyes.

“I’m sorry Mr Lupin, but if I let you retake the test I’ll have to do the same for everyone, and you know I can’t have that.” I nodded, wanting more than ever to get out of there.

“Yeah, okay that’s fine, thank you Professor.” I got up to leave but McGonagall motioned for me to sit down.

“Mr Lupin if you’d like me to help you understand why you got that score and maybe help you with some sort of studying schedule, I’m more than happy—”

“I studied my ass off!” I immediately regretted saying it. I leaned back in my chair as if it might swallow me whole and I opened my mouth to say something, but the professor held her hand up, silencing me. McGonagall’s lips were pursed, and amusement danced in her eyes. Amusement—not anger. I ran a hand through my hair and waited to hear what she might say.

“Mr Lupin, you understand that you cannot always have perfect scores, yes?” she asked. I furrowed my brow.

“What? Professor I—”

“People make mistakes; people fail. It’s a part of life, Mr Lupin, and sometimes all you can do is know how to improve for next time.” She paused. “Was that all you wished to talk about?” Professor McGonagall smiled at me and I didn’t know whether to be relieved or angry. She was the only teacher who didn’t treat me like I was a diseased child. She was the only teacher that didn’t stare at my scars and look at me like I was a broken doll. So I guess I was relieved. But I was also still angry. More at myself than her.

* * *

Sirius’ POV:

Remus had finally gotten back to the dorm an hour later, no book in sight. He obviously hadn’t gone to the library then. He’d held a brief conversation with James, not looking any of us in the eye, before he’d grabbed a seemingly random book off the shelf and gone back down to the common room. James and Pete had told me to let it go, that he was probably just in a mood. But it had come out of nowhere. And it was definitely more than a mood.

I found him sitting in a dark corner of the room, staring at the book in his hands. I watched him for a moment, the way his hair fell over his eyes, the curls at the back of his neck, his fingers drumming against the cover of the book. I shook my head and sauntered over, finally sitting against the arm of the chair.

“Are you actually reading that?” Remus glanced up at me for a moment before drilling his gaze back into the book. I pushed his hair out of his face.

“What else would I be doing with a fucking book, Sirius?” he muttered. I chose to ignore it and instead pulled the book from his hands. I also chose to ignore the string of curses he muttered at me after that.

“The founders of Hogwarts, Rowena Ravenclaw, Godric Gryffindor, Salazar…” I closed the cover of the book to see what he was reading. Hogwarts: A History. “You had this book memorised halfway through first year, Moony, why are you reading it?” Remus snatched it back and stood up to leave.

“No. Sit back down.” I told him, holding an arm out in front of him. He shoved that arm away.

“Get the fuck out of my way, Sirius.” He made to move past me, but I stepped in front of him, well aware of how annoying I was being. If I knew anything about Remus Lupin it was that he could never get over something unless he talked about it

“Remus, something is clearly bothering you and I’m here, ready to listen, so stop being a twat and sit down.” To emphasise my point, I sat down on the red armchair, motioning for him to sit on my lap. He leaned against the arm of the chair instead. I shook my head. “Moony, what is it?” I reached for his hand and he grabbed it, his back still turned to me.

“I failed the test,” he admitted quietly.

“But you said you got 83…” and he’d lied because he was too embarrassed. I almost asked why he even cared that much but I thought better of it. Remus hated homework, but he always did it. He always got things in on time and he always got good marks. Because he tried. We’d talked about it once. About the times he’d thought he’d never get to go to school, never get a proper education. He’d spent so long thinking he’d go without, so when he got in, he used it to his full advantage. When I didn’t say anything for a moment, Remus turned to face me. “What’d you get?” I finally asked. He lowered his head.

“17 percent,” he whispered. Oh wow.

“It was the full moon a couple of days ago, I’m sure, given the circumstances, you could retake the test,” I suggested. It was the wrong thing to say. Remus turned his body fully toward me now, amber eyes wide. He pulled his hand from mine. I felt very cold suddenly.

“No, Sirius, you don’t get it, I can’t use that as an excuse every time!” I looked at him, took in the burning passion, emotion, radiating from him.

“Why not? It’s not exactly easy to study when you’re body is mutilating itself!” I was angry suddenly, not at him but at the injustice of it all. At what he had to go through every month, and the consequences of it.

“Because then they’ll be right!” I locked eyes with him then, faced the full force of his burning light. In that moment, he was as bright as the sun, and I was staring right at him.

“What?”

He lowered his voice. “If I admit that I can’t do this, that I can’t do well at school and hand everything in on time, if I use my lycanthropy as an excuse to not do work then I’m proving that everyone that’s ever degraded or dehumanised werewolves is right. I’m proving that my dad is right.” I sucked in a breath. Remus was shaking, from sadness or anger, I couldn’t tell, but his eyes were glazed over too, and I shuddered, wanting nothing more than to bring back the light, the laughter that usually filled them. “And that’s the last thing I want,” he finished. I nodded, understanding. The defiance, the need to be better than they thought you were, the need to prove them wrong. I understood.

“So you’ll just do better on the next test. You’ll prove them wrong then,” I said searching Remus’ face for any sign that he might forgive himself. There was no point telling him to drop it, to move on. Remus was the type of person that carried everything with him, remembered everything. There was no changing it.

“But, I don’t know how,” he told me, linking his hand back with mine and tucking a strand of hair behind my ear. My heart ached for him. “I tried so hard this time, I put everything into that test, especially because I knew McGonagall would grade it fairly, and she did. I studied so hard, I thought I had it, but when I got the test back, I failed. There’s no denying it.” Remus voice was thick, like it was a struggle to get the words out. He’d taken to staring at my hand, tracing the lines in my palm. I nearly kissed him at the sight of it. I pulled him onto my lap instead, holding him around the waist.

“I don’t meant to sound like McGonagall or anything, but sometimes people fail, and you’ve just got to try to be better next time.” He locked eyes with me, and I was almost disappointed at the shadows hiding his face from view as he looked at me with something — more in his eyes. Something like love. A chuckle escaped his mouth and his teeth flashed.

“She basically said that exact thing to me earlier.” I smiled.

“It’s true though, everyone fails. Even Evans.” Remus snorted. His whole body seemed to relax, to lean into my touch. I loved every part of it. I didn’t entirely believe that Evans had ever failed anything, but that probably wouldn’t help right now. I wrapped my hands around his neck instead, not knowing how else to comfort him.

“Thank you,” Remus said, his eyes softening. “And I’m sorry I was complaining it was stupid but — “ I cut him off before he could continue, pulling back slightly.

“No. No, Remus never think that any of your problems are stupid, okay? I want to hear everything you have to say, problems and all.” I smiled, trying to brush off the vulnerability of what I’d just said. Remus wasn’t buying that. He looked lost for a moment, sitting in my lap, playing with my hair, and for a moment, I thought he’d take it all back. I thought he’d tell me he couldn’t do this, he couldn’t deal with me, with my baggage.

“Stop it,” he said.

“What?”

“Stop looking at me like you’re going to lose me. I’m here for good okay?” I nodded, blinking back the tears in my eyes. I leaned forward and pressed my lips to his, my arms still around his neck as his fingers kept playing with my hair. I nodded again, my forehead against his. “Plus, in case you forgot, I was complaining, you self absorbed ass-hat.” Remus cracked a smile and I kissed him again.

* * *

thank you so much hglb!!!

[fantasiesandbooks]

Hearts Don't  Break Round Here v

I don’t own any of the photos.

word count: 15k

Chanyeol x Reader x Sehun

Genre: Angst. Fluff. Romance

Prologue Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 

Soundtrack 1

Soundtrack 2

Chanyeol was trying to concentrate on what the teacher was saying but Baekhyun was making it a very difficult task. He was trying to caught his attention since he arrived at the school this morning.

The tall boy was never late for class but today he had decided to enter at the last minute before the classes began so he couldn’t talk with Baekhyun. He was so mad at him because he had asked you to go with him to the ball and you had accepted it without a second thought. Even when he had told his friend to leave you alone, he took advantage of the situation and played his cards well. Now, he would get to be stuck with you for an entire night dancing and talking. That thought made him boiled. His mind went back to last night’s argument. He knew he had said some harsh things at you but he felt hurt and angry at that moment and he didn’t think what was coming out of his mouth. When you yelled at him that he hadn’t asked you to go to the ball with him he felt a pang in his heart. 

Of course I would have asked her to go with me. She thinks I’m going with my cousin because I want to?. I have thought that asking someone like her wasn’t even allowed!. He thought furiously, referring to fact that you were not a rich girl. He huffed and rested his head above his notebook.

There was also the concern he felt because you weren’t ready for that kind of social interaction. - The reason why he and Baekhyun said this kind of gatherings were boring it’s not only because of the music that was played there. There was also the fact in which all the people will spend the whole night talking about businesses, how many trips they had made this year and more superficial topics. What he feared the most was that you, being a “new face” to them, will get questioned about all of those things and how will you handle it. 

“Yeol” Baekhyun whispered so Chanyeol could look at him but the other boy not even budge.

“Pst... Yeol” The brown haired boy called him again and Chanyeol ignored him.

“What’s up with you mate?. Yesterday you were acting weird before I left for home.” Baekhyun nudged him slightly with his elbow and the tall boy turned to look at him annoyed. “I’m not in the mood of talking, ok?” Chanyeol muttered angrily and Baekhyun looked at him weirded out.

“Come on, tell me what has you like that” The brown haired boy said.

“You” Chanyeol said sternly and focused his gaze at the front again.

“Mrs. Tomlinson, could I seat next to Kyungsoo? I can’t see well from here.” Chanyeol asked his teacher. He and Baekhyun knew the tall boy could see without a problem from his place and that he was lying just to get away from the shorter boy. The lady who was writing on the chalkboard turned to look at him and then at the empty spot next to the boy’s classmate.

“You can but do it quietly and No talking with Mr. Do, understand?” The woman said to him as Chanyeol was gathering his things and went to sit over next to Kyungsoo. Baekhyun looked at him baffled and scoffed once he saw his friend sitting at the other table and ignored him.

 It was brake time and Chanyeol exited the classroom quickly. He was walking rapidly since he wasn’t planning to have lunch with Baekhyun but he wasn’t quickly enough though since his friend caught up with him and grabbed his arm firmly to make him stop.

“Why are you mad at me?” Baekhyun asked him seriously. Chanyeol shook his arm so the other boy released it.

“You used what I had told you about the committee as an excuse for you to invite y/n to the ball” Chanyeol said sternly.

“It wasn’t an excuse. I really don’t want to dance with older women and have the other boys and girls mocking at me” Baekhyun countered back.

“So you don’t want people making fun of you but you don’t have a problem with them making fun of her?” Chanyeol asked him, his features hardened as an iceberg.

“What are you talking about? Why would they make fun of her?” Baekhyun asked confused, not following his friend’s train of thought. “You know how people behave at the ball. What do you think they are going to say once everyone there find out she is a servant.? How is she going to explain that her father is not a rich men or that her mother isn’t part of a group of the ones my mother and yours attend to because she is too busy being a maid at my house?” Chanyeol asked him.

Baekhyun tried to say something but there was not a decent answer on his brain at that moment. Truth is, that didn’t cross his mind and he only thought that if he got you a nice dress, there wouldn’t be a problem at all.

“I... didn’t think about that” The shorter boy admitted.

“Clearly” Chanyeol sneered.

“Ok, I mess it up on that but I can come up with something” Baekhyun said, trying to sound as confidently as he could.

“You better. If she gets put to shame due to your stupid idea of inviting her, consider our friendship done” Chanyeol said seriously and kept walking.

Baekhyun looked at his friend walking away and sighed in frustration.  The tall boy’s words made him realized that he is going to make you enter in a cave full of wolves ready to tear you apart. Now he was worried with how he could save you from it and also his friendship with Chanyeol.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After school Chanyeol went straight to his house. He was getting inside when Mr. Carson appeared and received him as usual but he could notice there was something off on the grown man’s features.

“Good afternoon Mr. Park” Carson said to him.

“Hello Carson” He said as he handed his jacket to the man for him to put it in the closet.

“Where’s Nana?” Chanyeol asked him.

“I saw her going upstairs although I do not know where she was heading” The man answered him.

Your friend nodded in understanding “Thank you Carson” he said politely.

“My pleasure Sir” Mr. Carson said.

Chanyeol started climbing the stairs but he couldn’t help turning around to look at the old man and asked him. “Carson?” Chanyeol said. 

“Yes sir” Mr. Carson turned to look at him.

“Are you ok?” Chanyeol asked him concerned.

Mr. Carson kept looking at him without saying a word for a briefly moment but his serious features never faltered.

“I’m as good as I can be Sir. Thank you for asking” The old man said unfazed.

“Ok” Chanyeol said although he wasn’t so sure about it.

Once he reached the second floor he walked across the hall and saw your grandma coming out of his room.

“Nana” Chanyeol said as he was approaching the old woman.

“I’m glad you are home Mr. Chanyeol” Nana said and smiled softly at the boy.

Chanyeol let his bag dropped to the floor and engulfed your grandma in a hug. Nana was surprised at the sudden gesture but she closed her arms around the boy as she heard him released a long sigh. “To what do I owe this sudden hug attack?” Nana asked him amused.

“I had a long day and I needed it” Chanyeol said tiredly as he let his chin rest over her shoulder while his body was leaning in an awkward position.  Your grandma let out a soft chuckle and rubbed his back soothingly.

“Come on, lets get you something to eat and you can tell me what happened to you while I keep you company” Nana said as she opened the door from Chanyeol’s room so he could left all his belongings inside.

“I can’t tell you” Chanyeol said.

“Why not? You have always told me the things that burden you” You grandma said confused.

“This one I can’t. It’s grown man’s stuff” Chanyeol explained.

Nana looked at him quizzically “Ok Mr. Grown Man. If you don’t want to tell me what is bothering you, don’t do it” She said sarcastically as the both of them were walking towards the dining room.

“Ahg... Nana” Chanyeol whined. “Fine... I’ll tell you but you can’t tell anyone about it”. Chanyeol gave the old lady a serious look and she nodded.

While Chanyeol was eating he told Nana about his fight with Baekhyun. He didn’t say anything about your guys argument from last night though nor that he was jealous of his friend for inviting you. The moment he saw your grandma’s bewildered expression and then the big frown that came after that he knew that it has not been a good idea to tell her about you going to the ball.

She sighed heavily once the black haired boy finished talking “Oh! that girl is going to kill me. What was she thinking when she agreed to that invitation?” She asked, not expecting an answer and shaking her head in disapproval. Chanyeol kept quiet and looked at your grandma raising up from her seat. 

“Oh but she will hear me. She will have to turn down that invitation and the sooner she does it the better” The old lady was visibly upset as she started walking across the room and towards the entrance of it so she could headed to the kitchen. Chanyeol at hearing that rised up from his seat so fast that the chair swung a little before stopping on its place. He ran towards the entrance and blocked the way so he could stopped the woman from walking out of the room.

“No Nana. You can’t tell her anything about what I have just told you. You promised me not to” Chanyeol said worriedly.

“I’m sorry but what that girl is going to do is mad and I won’t let her do that if it’s in my hands to prevent it” Your grandma said firmly.

“But if you say something to her she will know I was the one who told you about it” Chanyeol said desperately, trying to convinced her from not scolding you. 

“I won’t mention your name. Now let me pass” Nana said as she look at the tall boy sternly.

Chanyeol tried to put up his best pleading face but he knew that this time it wouldn’t work. After a few seconds of looking at your grandma’s hard gaze over him he let out a sigh in resignation and lowered his arms to let her pass. She passed next to him without saying a word. Chanyeol heard the clacking of her heels as she walked away and towards the kitchen. He raised his hands at the ceiling and groaned in frustration.

I need to stop her before she gets to y/n Chanyeol thought and went after her.

Once he crossed the hall he heard someone approaching and turned to looked around. It was Jongin, he was carrying some flowers pots to take them to the garden.

“Jongin” Chanyeol said loudly and startled the other boy that could barely see due to the plants.

“What?” Jongin said.

“Leave that. You have to help me to stop Nana from scolding at Y/n” Chanyeol said hastily.

“I don’t understand. Why is she scolding her?” Jongin left the pot on the floor and looked at his friend.

“Because I kinda tell her she’s going to the ball. I’ll explain you later, come on” Chanyeol said urgently and took Jongin by his arm so they could go after your grandma.

“You what?! Why did you do that?” Jongin said bewildered as he was running after Chanyeol. Both were going down the stairs rapidly until they reach the floor and passed through the kitchen’s door running.

“It wasn’t intentional” Chanyeol said as they felt a lot of eyes over them.

Some of the cooks, Emy and Mrs. Patmore looked at them in shock at the sudden intrusion. “Boys this is not your playground. You can’t run in here” Mrs. Patmore scolded them.

“Sorry” both boys said at unison “Have you seen my grandma?” Jongin asked them.

“She went to look for y/n at the laundry section” Emy said.

“Thank you” Jongin and Chanyeol said and passed through the back door.

 You were finishing folding the clothes and putting them in the different baskets in order to take them to the rooms when you heard your Nana calling for you.

“Here” You said as you took a shirt from the hanger.

“Have you lost your mind child?” Your grandma said.

”Wha...” you were saying but she cuts you off.

“How in the world would you think it would be okay for you to go to a ball made for rich people?” Your grandma asked you.

She was looking at you upset and you notice your brother and Chanyeol running towards the place where you two were standing. You looked at her baffled.  How did she find out about it? You thought in concern but after a moment, realization sank on you. You knew Jongin would never give you away so you assumed in has been Chanyeol. Both boys came to a halt, not so far from you so they could still hear what you and your grandma were saying.

“I don’t...” You were saying when she pointed a finger at you.

“Don’t you dare lie to me” Your grandma said sternly.

“It’s true” you sighed “but Nana, Baekhyun asked me for a favor and...” You tried to explain.

“I don’t care if it’s a favor you are not going to that ball” Nana said firmly “You don’t even have the money to buy a dress for that kind of event”.

“No but he said he will get me one” you said.

“Absolutely not! You are a Y/L/N and we don’t accept charity, understood?” Your grandma said out loud.

“It’s not charity, I’ll give it back but he was...” You were saying rapidly.

“Stop trying to convince me, my decision is final. You are not going to that ball if you don’t want your parents to find out about this. You have read too many stories for your own good” Your grandma scoffed.

At the last comment you frowned at her “What’s that supposed to mean?” You asked her.

“That you spend too much time fantasizing about the things you don’t have. It’s time to wake up child, you need to bring your mind back to reality” Your grandma said.

  “I live in reality, do you really think this the way I want to live my life?” You said angrily, gesturing at the clothes and baskets around you. “The only thing that makes it bearable are those stories”.

“But they are not real. What do you think would happen if you go to that ball? That the people there would accept you?” Your grandma asked you rhetorically. “We don’t belong in that circle. You have to accept what you have and be grateful for it” The old lady said harshly.

“I’m grateful for it but that doesn’t mean I have to settle with it. We are not going to be here for a long time anyway so why can’t I think of doing something else than cooking or folding clothes?” You asked her, anger building up inside you.

At hearing that Chanyeol frowned in confusion.  What does she mean they are not going to be here for a long time? he thought. Concern started growing inside of him.  Are they planning to go away? He asked himself and at that moment his attention went back to the argument when he heard your grandma raising her voice.

“Because people like us don’t get to have that kind of chances. You think you can be a writer or something like that?. You know it’s very hard to get a job like those around here, especially for a woman. You don’t even have a preparation for it. People are not going to take you seriously.” Your grandma let out a sigh in frustration.

“Your parents and I have encouraged this hobby of yours so you could stay away from trouble but we’ve never imagined that it will make you think this kind of nonsense was alright” Your grandma said.

You couldn’t believed what Nana was saying to you. She was lecturing you even when she haven’t given you the chance to explain yourself about the whole situation.  What had hurt you the most though was the fact that she didn’t believe you could change your life and find a job that would make you happy. You pursed your lips into a fine line, your eyes got watery due to the anger and sadness that you were feeling in that moment.

“Fine, I won’t go. But you are wrong about me, I’ll have a different life from this... Even if you believe in me or not” You said as you wiped the tears that were falling from your cheeks and walked away towards the house. You passed next to Chanyeol and Jongin. Both boys giving you a glum look at hearing your soft sobs and breaths. 

“Y/n” Chanyeol called you but you ignored him and kept walking.

“I’ll go with her” Jongin said and ran after you.

Chanyeol sighed and threw a fist at the air.  This was not his day at all and If he had the slightest hope that you two be would be back to being ok again, with this he was sure that you’ll ignored him for the rest of his life. That reminded him the words you had said earlier about not being there for a long time.

“Oh, What are you doing here?” Nana said as she turned to look at him, just realizing about Chanyeol’s presence when he let out a breath.

“I...” Chanyeol didn’t know what to answer. “Nana, what did she mean when she said that you won't be here for a long time? Are you leaving the house?” Chanyeol asked her hesitantly. Worry visible on his face.

The old lady sighed, there was tiredness on her features “You should talk to your parents about it. They can explain to you the situation better than I can” she said and headed towards the kitchen’s door.

Chanyeol followed her and said “Why can’t you tell me? Is it something bad?”.

Nana looked at him seriously as she kept walking “Boy, I really think you have to talk to them first” was the only thing she said and went inside the house. Chanyeol saw the lady walk pass the kitchen, loosing sight of her as she climbed up the stairs. His concern and fear were increasing after her words but in that moment he didn’t have the chance to know what they were talking about since his parents weren’t at home and they will arrived only after supper.

I shouldn’t have said anything he reproach himself and went towards his bedroom feeling remorsefully.

 You entered the first guest room you could find so you could take a moment and be able to cry without anyone looking for you. That didn’t last long since you heard a knock on the door.

“Y/n?” Jongin’s muffled voice sounded through the door.

“Yes” you sobbed.  You heard the door opened and closing and your brother’s footsteps against the wood floor. You felt the matress sank slightly when he sat next to you.

“Why did she has to be so mean?” You sobbed, trying to even your breath and calmed you down but find it hard to do so. Jongin put his arm around you and pull you towards his side.

“She was harsh with her words but I think she didn’t mean them in that way” Jongin tried to calmed you down. You sneered at his comment.

“Her lack of kindness tell me otherwise” You sneered.

“She’s just worried about you having to deal with unpleasant situations at the ball” Jongin explained. Deep down, he was also worried about it but he decided not to lecture you too. Maybe with this ball she will finally come around about the difference between us and them he thought.

“But that's not what I'm upset about, it’s about the thing she said. That I live in a fantasy because I want to work on something else and not being a servant forever. Why is it so bad to dream that?” You asked him upset.

“There’s nothing wrong with it. Maybe she sees it in that way because if you don’t get to change it then you will feel frustrated and miserable the rest of your life” Your brother explained.

“Sometimes I feel miserable doing the same things everyday. Don’t you?” You asked him.

Jongin took a moment to answer you and let out a heavy sigh “Yeah but right now I can’t change it so I try to see the good sides of it” He said and gave you a little smile.

You cupped his cheek softly “I wish I could be like you in that sense” you said.

“You’ll be. Aging makes us wiser” He said.

You snorted at his comment “Whatever you said super old boy who’s only two years older than me” you said sarcastically. Jongin ruffled your hair and you smacked his hand away from your head. “Hey!” You complained.

Jongin chuckled and rested his hand on his lap.  You pouted at him but at seeing his mischievous face a smile crept up your lips.

“Thank you Nini. You are the only one that understands me” You said and leaned your head over his shoulder.

“Anytime Bugsy” He said as he stroked your hair.

After a moment you remembered the cause of all this ruckus “I’m gonna kill him” You muttered. “It was Chanyeol, wasn’t it?” You lifted your gaze towards your brother’s face.

“Ah... he didn’t mean to though. You know how his mouth sometimes gets loose when he’s talking with Nana or us”. Jongin tried to excuse his friend.

“He did this on purpose because he was mad about me going to the ball with Baekhyun” You countered back.

“You should talk to him. Give him the benefit of the doubt so he can explain himself” Jongin suggested. You scoffed at it since you were reluctant to that idea.

“I’ll never talk to him again” you said annoyed. You got up from the bed and went over the mirror that was located next to the dresser. You eyes were puffy and red due to all the crying. 

“I look horrible” you said upset at your reflection.

“I’ve seen you worse” Jongin said jokingly and you gave him a pointed look through the mirror. You went over the bathroom and splashed your face with cold water so you could get rid of the puffiness and redness of your eyes.

Once you came out of the bathroom you sighed at your brother.

“Better?” Jongin asked you.

“Yeah” you said as you grabbed your apron from the bed. Jongin stood up and walked towards the door.

“Come on” He said while he opened it “ I still have work to do and so do you”. He motioned you to exited the room.

Once you were outside he closed the door behind him and you said “Hey, could you go with me tomorrow to Baekhyun’s house so I can tell him I’m not going to the ball?. I think it would be better to tell him before he gets a dress for me” You said to your brother as your were walking.

“Sure, we can go in the afternoon” Jongin said nonchalantly and you nodded.

“Thanks”. You said and gave him a little smile.

“No problem” he said and set his gaze at the front.

 It was 09 pm and Chanyeol was sprawled on the living room’s couch waiting for his parents to arrived. After dinner he went to the kitchen to wash the dishes. He was hoping to see you and apologized to you but instead he only saw Emy alone cleaning at the floor so he fulfilled his chores quietly. After the argument between you and Nana, Chanyeol was feeling miserably, he went to his room and tried to get distracted by spending time with Toben but even doing that didn’t help to loose the tightness he was feeling in his heart. He also felt anxious about the thing that Nana didn’t want to tell him. At first he thought it was something about your family but after seeing Emy’s sad face in the kitchen and remembering Mr. Carson odd features when he greeted him, he thought maybe there was something worse that involved the whole house. He grabbed a book and tried to read it while waiting but failing at doing so. 

“Ahg... why are they taking so long?” He muttered to himself, seconds before he heard the entrance door opened and the voices of Mr. Carson and his parents. He stood up and went to meet them.

“Good night sir, madame” Mr. Carson said as he was closing the door.

“Good night Carson” Both of Chanyeol’s parents said.

“Mum, dad” Chanyeol said as he came out of the living room and into the foyer.

“Son, what are you doing here? You have school tomorrow” Chanyeol’s mother said.

“Can I talk to you two now?” Chanyeol asked them.

“About what?” Chanyeol’s father said to him.

“Is there any problem in this house? Something I’m not aware of?” Chanyeol asked them.

Both his parents looked at each other for a moment before his father said “Let’s go to the studio”.

The man walk pass Chanyeol and followed straight towards the room. Her mother sighed heavily and went after him alongside with their son. Once inside, Chanyeol’s father explained to him their situation. Chanyeol couldn’t believe what he was hearing. He didn’t care about the fact that they weren’t rich anymore.  The only thing he was concerned about was what would happen to all the employees. He was sad to know that many of them would have to leave, which reminded him of your words.

“But what about Nana and her family... Carson, Mr. Patmore. Emy? They are coming with us, right?” Chanyeol asked his father.

“The only one that’s coming with us is Carson. Your grandma accepted to have him as a second butler. The rest of them will have to find another job” The man said to Chanyeol and he look at him wide eyed.

“But they have to come with us. Nana and her family I mean. They have been with us their whole life, they are like our family” Chanyeol said desperate.

“We care about them and I’ll will help them to get a job as soon as they can but they are not part of our family Chanyeol, do not get mistaken about that” His father said firmly. Chanyeol looked at him angrily “How can you say that? They have always taken care of us. Nana raised me. And Jongin and Y/n are my friends” he said outraged.

“They do that because it is their job. We are paying them for it” Chanyeol’s father pointed out.

“Nana has affection for all of us. They have given me love and their friendship, that weren’t part of their duties” Chanyeol argued back.

“Listen, I could barely pay for your college’s tuition. My duty as the head of this family is to watch for your mother’s and yours well being.” The man looked at Chanyeol sternly.

“Fine, I won’t go to college then” Chanyeol said firmly and his father looked at him angrily.

“Don’t be absurd” His father said dismissively.

“I’m being serious about it. If paying the tuition is what is keeping you from not taking them with us then I don’t want to go to college. I’ll work hard so I can save money and go to college later on” Chanyeol explained with a big frown on his forehead.

“I will not listen to this nonsense of yours, Chanyeol. You will do what I say and that’s final” The man said angrily.

“That’s your problem, you never listen to anyone but yourself and your decisions not only affects you but my mother and me as well” Chanyeol spat.

“Chanyeol” His mother intervened when she saw that their anger was increasing.

“Tell me I am wrong mother. He had never asked for your opinion in the money decisions and this is the consequence of that.“ Chanyeol pointed out.

”You insolent brat! go to your room before I lose the little sanity I still have” His father roared and signaled the door.

“C/F/N” The woman raised her voice and hold Chanyeol’s arm.

“Go” She said to Chanyeol “I need to talk to your father”. She gave the tall boy a serious look. Chanyeol’s eyes were getting watery due to the anger he was feeling but he knew that the look his mother was giving him meant she wouldn't argue about it. He let out a frustrated sigh and stormed out of the studio.

 You were braiding your hair, getting ready to go to sleep when you heard a crack on your window. You stopped for a second to look at it but found nothing strange outside so you kept doing your hair. You thought maybe it was the wind since the glasses and doors started creaking during this time of the year due to the cold. You heard another crack and another after it coming from the window only this time the sound was louder.

“What?” You said intrigued.

You approached to the window and looked outside of it. You huffed at seeing Chanyeol standing outside your house with one of his hands full of tiny rocks or at least that was what you assumed he was throwing at. You opened it and stuck your head out. Chanyeol saw you taken aback. He had thought he was throwing rocks at Jongin’s window.

“What do you want?” You asked him annoyed.

“I am... sorry” Chanyeol said nervously.  If looks could kill I would probably be dead by now he thought as you looked at him hardly. 

“I have thought it was Jongin’s window” Chanyeol rushed to say.

“Ahg...” you rolled your eyes at him “it’s the other window” you said and pointed at the dark window next to yours.

“Oh” Chanyeol said, embarrassment showed all across his face “thank...” he was saying as you got your head in and slammed the window hardly enough so he could see you were upset.

“You” he trailed off.

He pinched the bridge of his nose in frustration and shook his head as if to clear it up.

He knew he had to made up with you but right now he needed to talk to the only friend he hadn't had a fight with. He went to stood below Jongin’s window and started throwing rocks again.

You sat upset in your bed when you heard Chanyeol throwing rocks at your brother’s window. You sneered at it.

He doesn’t know his friend? you thought to yourself. It would take a rock of the size  of a meteorite for Jongin to hear it and wake up.

You stoop up and went over to your brother’s room only to find him already sleep. “Jongin” you called him as you shook him gently.

“Jongin, wake up” you said and shook him harder this time. The boy frowned and said something you didn’t understand.

“What?” You asked him.

“Is work time already?” He said tiredly.

“No, wake up. Your dumb friend is outside” you said irritated. Jongin opened his eyes and got up from the bed.

“What? Why?!” Jongin asked you, trying to concentrate.

“I don’t know. Asked him yourself” you said as you turn on the lamp on his nightstand and went back to your room. Jongin went to his window and opened it. He saw the tall boy and asked “What are you doing here so late?”.

“I need to talk to you. Can you come down?” Chanyeol said to his friend.

Jongin sighed tiredly “I’m tired Chanyeol, I want to sleep”

“Please” Chanyeol insisted.

Jongin groaned “Fine but let’s make it quick” he said. He shut down his window and went over the house entrance to meet his friend.

Chanyeol told your brother about the argument he had with his father. Jongin listened intently the whole time, yawning from time to time due to his tiredness.

“I really hate my dad right now” Chanyeol said bitterly.

“There’s no point in it. You still have to live him them” Jongin yawned.

“I feel so impotent” Chanyeol said, you could hear the frustration in his voice.

“Why?” Jongin asked him.

“Because I wasn’t able to change his mind” Chanyeol said, shrinking a little.  ”You couldn't do anything and what had happened was not your fault” Jongin explained.

“How can you not be angry at all of this?. At him?” Chanyeol asked him, referring to his father.

“I am angry but not at your parents nor you. After all, the money that your father lost was yours. You could use it as napkins and I wouldn’t even care.” Jongin said. “The thing I’m mad about is the fact that the future of my family and my own depended on you.“ Jongin said seriously. Chanyeol looked at his friend, this was probably the first time that he had complained about his social position so openly. - Jongin used to always make jokes about it or doing his tasks without any complain. Ever since the day they talked about the tall boy’s feelings for you was when Chanyeol understood a little bit more the differences between the two of them. He never had to worry about getting money to support their parents or just to have something to eat at the table. Now, he would know that feeling but for some odd reason he wasn’t concerned or at least not as much as he thought he should be.- “What are you going to do?” Chanyeol asked him.

“ I don’t know yet” Jongin said sincerely.

“And y/n and the rest of your family?” Chanyeol said sadly.

“Look for another job around here or maybe at downtown” Jongin said.

“Is she very mad at me?” Chanyeol asked his friend although deep down he knew the answer.

“Considering she almost ripped my arm off when she woke me up I would say yes” Jongin said.

Chanyeol sighed and looked at the sky “It really wasn’t my intention to turn Nana against her”.

“They haven’t talked to each other yet” Jongin pointed out.

“I feel that with y/n I will have to apologize for the rest of my life” Chanyeol said regretfully.

“Maybe not your whole life. I’ll say it will take for her 30 years to forgive you” Jongin said teasingly. Chanyeol nudged him playfully and Jongin laughed. The tall boy joined his laugh and after a moment both went quiet.

“I don’t want to go without you” Chanyeol said with a hoarse voice. His eyes prickling with the tears that were forming in his eyes. Jongin looked at his friend’s miserable features and he couldn’t help the tears on his eyes too.

“Me neither” Your brother trailed off.

“This is the worst day of my life” Chanyeol said quietly. Jongin padded his friend’s back in a soothing way and nodded at his words. “Mine too” The brown haired boy said and both boys kept looking at the sky during the silent night.

The next day you and Jongin were entering Baekhyun’s manor front gates. It was a big house but not as big as Chanyeol’s, with the reddish color of the bricks that covered the facade. It had a huge front yard too, painted with orange and golden leaves due to the season and in the center of it was a fountain with the figure of an Angel at the top.

“What are you going to tell him?” Jongin asked you.

“The truth. That my grandma prohibited me from going” You said bluntly.

“If you want to go, you should try talking with Nana again” Jongin suggested.

“You sa it. She is not going to listen” you said matter of factly and rang on the doorbell.

“Good afternoon”. A maid from Baekhyun’s house said.

“Good afternoon miss. I’m y/n and this is my brother Jongin. We are looking for Mr. Baekhyun Byun” You said politely and the woman looked at you weirded out. “Can you tell me the reason of your visit?” The maid asked you suspiciously.

“It’s regarding the ball” You said.

“Wait here. I will have to check that with Mr. Byun“ She said and closed the door in your guys faces.

“Thanks for the hospitlity” you said sarcastically.

“Don’t take it personal. Maybe she’s confused that 2 servants are looking for one of her bosses”. Jongin said.

In that moment Baekhyun opened the door and smiled at you two.

“Y/n, Jongin. It’s so good to see you. Please come inside” The boy said excitedly and step aside so you and your brother could walk inside. “Susan, Ms. Y/n and Mr. Jongin are my friends and they are welcome here so I would appreciate if you let them in as soon as they arrive” Baekhyun said to the woman. 

“As you wish Sir.” Susan said unfazed and walked out towards the dining room. The three of you watched her go and Baekhyun clasped his hands “Ok, so what brings you here?. I may say I wasn’t expecting this visit but Susan said it was something regarding the ball. Let’s go to the living room and we can talk there, shall we?” Baekhyun said and motioned you towards the room. Jongin headed first towards it. 

“Ladies first” Baekhyun said and you followed your brother with the other boy walking a few steps behind you.

“Would you like anything to drink?. I know it’s a long way from Chanyeol’s house and you must be thirsty” Baekhyun said and went towards the wall to ring the bell for someone to come.

“We are good thank you” Jongin rushed to say. Baekhyun stared at you confused for a second and let go of the bell.

“Ok” The brown haired boy said as he took a seat in front of you and your brother

“We don’t have much time and I just want to tell you that I can’t go to the ball with you. I’m sorry” you said apologetically.

The smile on Baekhyun’s face was slowly fading away. “May I ask why?” Baekhyun said confused.

You felt bad at seeing his sad face. “My grandma found out about it and she didn’t like the idea so she prohibited me from going. I’m really, really sorry Baekhyun” You said, remorse visible on your face.

“I know your grandma. Maybe if you tell her I’m desperate she would be ok with that” Baekhyun said worryingly.

“We fought because she didn’t want to listen to me. I don’t think she will listen to me now” You said sadly. Baekhyun looked at you with remorse “I’m sorry I caused you troubles” he said sincerely.

“Don’t feel bad about it. She still has some old believings” You said.

“I’m sorry to intrude but y/n, we have to get back to the manor. It’s getting late and I still have some things to do before the day is over” Jongin said as he was standing up. 

“Let me take you back to the house” Baekhyun said to both of you.

“Thank you but we don’t want to disturb you” You said as you stoop up.

“Not at all. I don’t have any lessons today and Joseph is available... And also I want to talk to your grandma if you are ok with that. I think if she doesn’t listen to you then at least she will have to listen to me, right?” Baekhyun said hopefully. You and Jongin looked at each other as if talking in a secret language with your eyes that only the two of you could understand. Baekhyun waited hesitantly watching you two exchanging looks. 

“You could try” Jongin said and shrugged.

“Y/n...” Baekhyun said, seeking for your approval.

”You can't make her mad any more than she already is... I hope so.” You said and Baekhyun gave you a little smile.

“Ok then, I’ll get the car ready. Wait here” He said and went out of the room in search of his driver.

When you arrived at the manor Jongin left you and Baekhyun at the kitchen’s back door. 

“Do you think Chanyeol is going to get mad if he finds out I’m here?” Baekhyun asked you hesitantly. -On the way back to Chanyeol’s house, Baekhyun told you and Jongin about his argument with your friend. For you it was weird what he had said as Chanyeol words sounded like your grandma’s. But then I don’t understand, if he was concerned about people mocking at me at the ball, why did he say I didn’t offer to go with him? You thought confused.

“Don’t worry, he’s at his music lesson. He won’t be here until supper” You assured him. Baekhyun nodded and stooped walking once you reach the kitchen’s door.

“She must be here” you said to him “wait here, I won’t take long, ok?”.

“Yes” Baekhyun said and you entered the house.

You walked silently, careful that no other kitchen worker saw you or else Mrs. Patmore would put you to work as soon as possible. You spotted Nana coming out of Mrs. Carson office and walked straight towards her.

“Y/G/N there’s someone who is waiting outside looking for you” you said firmly. Nana turned to look at you “I’m not expecting any visitors and I’m busy” she said firmly.

“It’s Mr. Baekhyun. He wants to talk to you. I told him you won’t listen but he insisted” you said, standing straighter and not letting your grandma to notice your nervousness.

“Good heavens child!” The old lady said in frustration “Where is he?”.

“Outside the kitchen’s back door” you answered.

“Why didn’t you let him in?” She said in astonishment as she rushed to walk to the kitchen. “Because he is only here to see you and you said that any visitors for us can’t walk inside the house” you pointed out and your grandma rolled her eyes at you.

“Oh! That you do listen” she said as she opened the door and went outside with you following behind.

Baekhyun was pacing around and got startled when he heard the door being open abruptly and watched you and Nana coming out from it. “Hey Nana!” Baekhyun said shyly.

“Mr. Baekhyun, what are you doing here?” Nana asked the boy. “I want to talk to you. I believe it’s my fault that you and y/n are mad at each other so I wanted to clear things up” Baekhyun said solemnly.

“I appreciate all the trouble you took by coming here but I won’t allow her to go to that ball” Your grandma said seriously.

“Can we talk? It would be for only a couple of minutes and then I’ll go” Baekhyun asked your grandma politely. She looked at you and you got the hint that she wanted for you to leave the two of them alone.

“I’m gonna go. Emy should be looking for me” you said and went inside again. Your grandma looked at Baekhyun and nodded “Alright then, let’s talk” she said and Baekhyun gulped.

You heard the clock announcing 06 pm, an hour before supper. You were worried since you hadn’t heard anything from your grandma and Baekhyun. You wanted to check on them before but Mrs. Patmore was keeping you busy, telling you to do one thing after the other without a break. You were walking towards the kitchen’s cellar when your grandma opened the door and called for you. “Y/n, come here” The old lady said and motioned for you to go outside. You walked quickly and went out. You saw Baekhyun standing there and smiling shyly at you.

“What’s going on?” You asked to no one in particular.

“After talking with Mr. Baekhyun I have decided that you can go with him to the ball” Your grandma said solemnly. You looked from one to the other baffled.

“He had some good arguments and he exposed them in a very polite and reasonable way so I think it would be suitable for you to with him” Your grandma said.

You looked at your friend “Did you put a spell on her or something like that?” You asked him surprised.

“I’m very charming” Baekhyun said jokingly.

You grandma cleared her throat and both of you returned your attention to her “That being said, I want to apologize to you Y/n. I should have let you explain yourself and not have reacted so hastily”.

You looked at her wide eyed for a moment “it’s ok grandma. I accept your apologies” you said quietly and your grandma gave you a little side smile.

“Now, regarding the ball there are some rules young lady. I already talk about them with Mr. Baekhyun and I will talk to you when we get home.”

“Yes ma’am” you said out loud.

“I have to get back to check on the dinner. You should go and walk Mr. Baekhyun to his car. After that come back to the kitchen to set the table for the rest of us” Your grandma said and you and Baekhyun nodded.

“Good night Mr. Baekhyun” Your grandma said as she opened the door to walked inside.  Baekhyun moved swiftly and embraced Nana in a tight hug.

“Thank you Nana. You are an Angel walking on this earth” the boy said and squeezed her a little bit. Your grandma yelped and rolled her eyes at him but smiled nevertheless. 

“Let me go boy or you are going to brake my back” Your grandma said and you laughed at them.

“Sorry. I’ll be gentler next time” Baekhyun said and waved her goodbye. After the door closed you smiled at him

“How did you convince her?” You asked him as you two walked towards the house entrance.

“I said to her that I was really desperate and that you were the only female friend I could ask this favor for. And I begged... like a lot” Baekhyun said and you laughed.

“Well you need to teach us how to do a convincing begging because this is one of the few times in which she has changed her mind” You said. “Sure! I charge $3 the hour” He said playfully.

You two arrived at the place where Baekhyun’s car and Joseph were waiting.

“Thank you Baek” you said and smiled at him.

“I’m the one that is thankful to you” Baekhyun returned the smile.“Oh and before I forget about it. Tomorrow I’m going to fetch the dress I got for you and Joseph will bring it to you on Thursday, ok?”

“Yes. Thank you” You said to him and Joseph, who was standing beside the car and both smiled at you.

“Well, we should be going” Baekhyun said and waited for Joseph to open the car’s door.

“Have a good night the two of you” You said.

“Good night” said both men. Joseph started the engine and Baekhyun waved at you. You waved him goodbye and saw the car drive away.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

It was Wednesday afternoon and you were heading downtown to get some errands for Mrs. Patmore. You were walking quickly since it was already 03 pm and you didn’t want to come back when there was no sunlight anymore. Chanyeol was walking through the front gates when he saw you coming his way. Ok this is my chance to talk to her. Don’t blew it Chanyeol He thought and prepared mentally for it.

“Hey y/n. Can we...” Chanyeol was saying when you walked passed and ignored him. Good way to start he thought sarcastically and went after you.

“Y/n” He called for you and quickened his pace to match yours.

“Why are you walking so fast? Where are you going?” Chanyeol asked you but you remain silenced with your eyes at the front.

“You are giving me the silent treatment again?” Chanyeol scoffed. “Fine, you know I can do this all day. You’ll break sooner or later”. You came to a halt and looked at him.

“I thought you were mad at me since you were the one that started the fight.” You said.

“I was... but I am not anymore” Chanyeol stuttered, surprised that you have talked to him so suddenly.

“Good, because I’m still mad at you” you said and continued walking.

“It has been four days since we argued. Why are you still so mad at me?” Chanyeol asked confused.

You sneered at his comment “You really have the nerve to ask that?. Ok let’s see. First, you got mad because I was going to the ball with your friend, even when I already had said it was a favor to him. And then you went with my grandma and gossip her about it and because of that the two of us engaged in an argument. Jeez Chanyeol, I don’t know, maybe I’m being hormonal or something” You said sarcastically and Chanyeol looked at you with remorse.

“Ok, I know that I was wrong for yelling at you the other night but you’re wrong about the incident with Nana. I didn’t tell her anything about you. I have fought with Baekhyun earlier that day at school because he didn’t think things through about inviting you to the ball. When I came home Nana saw I was upset about it and she asked me about what had happened. I told her about the argument I had with him and she went looking for you after that. I didn’t know she would react that way” Chanyeol explained short of breath due to the talking and walking rapidly. You frowned at him and shook your head. 

Chanyeol stopped walking to catch his breath and called you. “Y/n please” he said loudly. “I’m sorry” he said between breaths. You stopped and looked back at him. 

He walked towards you, his eyes never leaving yours.

“I mean it. I’m so sorry for everything” Chanyeol said, you could see there was honesty in his gaze.

You closed your eyes for a moment and sighed “Ok.” You just said and kept walking. Chanyeol followed you and walked beside you.

“Ok as in I forgive you?” Chanyeol asked you.

“Yes” you said without looking at him.

“Thank you” he said and a smile crept on his lips.

“Can we start talking as always?” The tall boy said.

“Don’t push it” you answered him.

He glance at you amused “Ok, I’ll just walk beside you in silence until your anger has died down”. You rolled your eyes at him but said nothing about it.

When the two of you arrived at the plaza, you left Chanyeol sitting on a bench. He was taking care of the things you had bought at the grocery store while you were at the bakery buying some bread for tonight’s dinner. He was looking through the bag you had left on the bench when you came back empty handed.

“Why didn’t you buy the bread?” Chanyeol asked you.

“They said it will take 15 more minutes for the bread to come out” You said and took a seat beside him. You put the coins into the pocket of your coat when you felt a piece of fabric inside of it. You took it out and looked at it.

It was Chanyeol’s handkerchief. The one he had put over your hand when you got injured. You had washed it after that and had the intention to return it to him but you had forgotten that you had left it on your coat.

Chanyeol was looking at the other side at a couple of people passing by.

You cleared your throat “Chanyeol” you said and the boy turned to look at you.

“Here” you said and extended the handkerchief towards him. “I have forgotten to give it back to you. Thank you”. Chanyeol looked at the white piece of fabric with the first letter of his name sew on it resting over your hand. His gaze settled on your eyes. You were looking at him expectantly.

“Keep it” he said and closed your hand around it.

“But it’s yours. It it the first one you sew. I remembered you said it was your favorite” you said.

“Yeah but you can have it.” He said gently. “I have more since my grandpa used to say a real men should always carry one in case a lady would need one” He laughed at the memory. You looked at it once more before you put it back in your pocket “Thanks” you said shyly.

“No problem” The tall boy smiled sheepishly at you.

You gave him a shy smile and averted your gaze after that.

“So, are you and Nana ok now?” Chanyeol asked you awkwardly.

“Yes” You answered him.

“That’s good” Chanyeol said and you nodded.

“And I’m still going to the ball” You blurted out.

Chanyeol looked at you surprised “Oh” was the only thing that came out of his mouth. “Are you sure?” Chanyeol asked you doubtfully, trying not to make you angry again.

“Yeah, I had already tell Baekhyun I will help him. I can’t break my promise” You said calmly.

Chanyeol gave an intake of breath “Ok” he let out. “I’ll be around just in case you would need my help”.

“Thanks” You said.

Chanyeol kept looking at you. He was still a little bit jealous of Baekhyun but he wanted to have faith that you didn’t feel anything for that boy.

“Y/n” Your friend said hesitantly. You hummed in response and turned your face to see him.

“Do you remember the last time we were sitting here talking and I...” Chanyeol was saying but got cut off by a man approaching the two of you.

“Good afternoon Sir., Miss” the man said cheerfully and made a little bow at you. He looked young. You thought maybe he was in his late 20’s. He was wearing casual clothes, a beret and was carrying around a big camera. “Good afternoon” you and Chanyeol said after recovering from the state of surprise you were in. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to scare you. My name is Benedict Hunnam and I’m a photographer as you can see” The man said, gesturing at his camera and carried on “I was wondering if you two could help me. You see, I’m making a proyect for the local’s newspaper about the daily life here in Corsega. My job is to take photos about the city and its people and you seemed to be a very nice couple so I wanted to ask you if I could take a picture of you two.” The man said kindly.

“It’s not like that” Chanyeol said hastily. “We are not…”

“…a couple” You added, your face was red with embarrassment.

“Oh, I see. Sorry for my mistake” Benedict rushed to say.

“But we could help you if you don’t have a problem with that” Chanyeol said.

“Great! Let me just set the camera” Benedict said as he was leaving his bag on the floor and steading the camera.

You looked at Chanyeol stunned and pinched his arm. He grimaced in pain and suppressed a scream. “What?”.

“We can’t be in the newspaper together” You muttered.

“Why not? It’s not like we are going to be on the cover of it anyway.” Chanyeol said nonchalantly.

“Still, You are part of one of the richiest families in this city and I am a servant at your house. Your parents and Nana are going to kill us if they see that picture” You explained.

Chanyeol rolled his eyes at you “Relax. Nana reads them every now and then, My father only reads the front page and the business section and my mom doesn’t even look at it unless one of her friends tells her that there is a scandal that cannot be missed” he said.

“And you think people in this town are not gossipy” You said sarcastically.

“Hey Benedict!” Chanyeol called the man and he settled his gaze on the tall boy.

“We have a little situation here. See, we are friends but the thing is that she’s an employee at my house and the people of this town knows me and her and we don’t want any kind of misunderstanding so can you put the picture in some irrelevant page so anyone can see it?.” Chanyeol said politely and Benedict laughed.

“Actually this photos go on the final page. Since they are not from “important people”, many of them don’t reach that page” The man explained.

“Oh! I haven’t seen that section” Chanyeol admitted  embarrassed.

“You just proved my point” Benedict sneered.

“Sorry” Chanyeol said awkwardly.

“It’s ok.” The man said and clasped his hands “Ok. The camera is ready, now I need you to get closer so both fit in the frame” he said and motioned for you to get closer with Chanyeol. You did what you were told and sat straighter, feeling Chanyeol's arm brushing against yours. Both of you looked at each other for a briefly moment and you turned your head to the front.  You cleared your throat “Like this?” You asked him.

“Perfect!” Benedict said “Now you just have to give me your best smiles”.

Chanyeol and your smiled widely. You could feel the tightness in your cheeks due to the cold, your smile was forced and you tried to relax the muscles of your face.

“Did you take it already?” Chanyeol asked through gritted teeth.

“No. There’s something that’s not working. Hold on, just a second” Benedict said as he was trying to find the flaw.

“Hurry! I don’t feel my cheeks anymore” Chanyeol said. You turned your head slightly to look at him and chuckled at seeing his face. You could see all his teeth showing and it was so obvious he was forcing his happy face too. At hearing your laugh, Chanyeol turned to looked at you and laughed too.  You saw the camera’s flash through the corner of your eye and heard the picture being taken after that. Both of you looked at the front, the tall boy shaking head in amusement and you tried to contain your laugh when another picture was taken.

 “I’m so sorry. I think I wasn’t looking at the camera in any of the photos.” Your laugh died down. “It was his fault”. You said and pointed at your friend.

“My fault? You started laughing without reason” Chanyeol countered back.

“Only because your face looked similar to the one from a creepy porcelain doll” You said.

Benedict laughed “It’s ok kids. I prefer honest smiles rather than fake ones”.

“Would we be able to look at the photos once you have them?” You asked him.

“Sure. I’m working on that store over there” Benedict pointed to the store next to the antique shop. “I think I will get them ready by Saturday so can stop by the shop that day.”

“Ok, thank you Benedict” You smiled at him.

“Thank you to you two.” The man said politely “Could you tell your names?”.

“I’m Chanyeol” The black haired boy said.

“And I’m Y/n” you said.

“Nice to meet you” Benedict said and you answered the same.

“Well, I have to get going” Benedict said and carried his camera. He approached you and Chanyeol and shook hands with both of you.

“Have a nice afternoon” The man said and walked away.

You turned to look at the big clock located at one side of the plaza and stood up.

”The bread should be ready by now. I'm going back to the bakery” you announced and Chanyeol nodded in agreement.

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It was Friday afternoon and Chanyeol was looking for Jongin desperately. He finished getting ready for the ball half and hour ago when he came up with the idea of bringing his friend along. He was running towards the garden when he watched Jongin getting out from the kitchen’s back door.

“Jongin” Chanyeol said loudly. The other boy, who was carrying a bag full of seeds, looked at him.

“I need a favor. You have to come with me right now” Chanyeol said to his friend. “What kind of favor?” Jongin asked him as he was going down the stairs.

“I need you to come to the ball with me. Quickly, we need to get you dressed” Chanyeol said as he was walking towards the house’s main entrance. “What?” Jongin stood frozen in his place.

Chanyeol turned to look at him impatiently and took your brother’s arm to make him walk. “No, stop. I don’t want to go to the ball” Jongin complained, trying to release his arm from his friend’s grip.

“Too late. You already agreed to that” Chanyeol said.

“When? You just told me about it a few seconds ago” Jongin argued.

“I saw you nodded slightly. I counted that as a yes” Chanyeol said as he was pulling the other boy. “You liar. I never did that. Why do want me to go to the ball?” Jongin said annoyed.

“Because I’m going to dance with your sister” Chanyeol said.

“Wait, what? I thought she was going with Baekhyun” Jongin said confused. Chanyeol came to a halt, turned to look at your brother and sighed in frustration.

“She is going with him but you can dance with different people at the opening act, remember?” Chanyeol said to him. He was talking about the time when the boys were talking about the ball with Suho and the others. “I think I remember now” Jongin said although he wasn’t very sure about it. “I need you to go to the ball so you can dance with Chloe and I can dance with y/n”. Chanyeol explained.

“I don’t want to dance with your cousin” Jongin said.

“That’s why I said it is a favor.” Chanyeol pointed out “Please. It’s only for the opening act. If you don’t do that Baekhyun will be stuck to her for the entire night” The tall boy said. Jongin was contemplating that idea for a moment.

Chanyeol rolled his eyes at him “Can’t you see I’m desperate here?” He said annoyed. Jongin pursed his lips but agreed at the end. “Only for this time” he pointed a finger at his friend warningly. Chanyeol nodded eagerly.  “I will start charging you for this kind of favors” Jongin said to him. “Too bad I’m poor now” Chanyeol said teasingly and smirked at his friend. “Moron” Jongin said and nudged at him.

 You were waiting for Baekhyun at your house. Nana had excused you with Mrs. Patmore saying you weren’t feeling so well and needed to get back home. The house was empty since your parents were working at the manor. You took a look at yourself in the mirror one last time. You couldn’t recognize the person standing in front of it.  You were wearing a puffy dress with the bottom covering your feet. The fabric was a beautiful sky blue color and felt soft to the touch. It had a bow at the waist, puffed sleeves and the top was made with a corset that crushed your ribs. Your hair was falling in waves and you had a silver hair pin attached to one side of it. When you went down the stairs, Nana looked at you baffled.

“Oh darling you look so beautiful” She said. “Thank you Nana” you smiled at her.

The old woman’s eyes were getting watery.

“Why are you crying?” You asked her confused.

“I don’t know. It’s just that you really look like a young lady with that dress. You are not a child anymore” Nana said as she was wiping some tears out of her eyes.

“If you say that because of the corset, let me tell you I don’t like it. I won’t be able to eat or breath with this” you said and your grandma chuckled.

“Oh girl! Sometimes I think you would be happier if you were a boy” Your grandma shook his head.

“I like being a girl” you said solemnly.

Your grandma took your hands in hers and said “Enjoy this night because this is your Cinderella night. And also take care of yourself” she said.

You smiled at her and squeezed her hands “I will. Don’t worry about it”.

Both of you heard the engine of a car near the entrance door. “That’s must be Mr. Baekhyun” Nana said and went to open the door.

Baekhyun was getting outside of the car when he saw the old woman stepping out of the house. “Good evening Nana. How are you?” Baekhyun greeted her cheerfully.

“Good evening Mr. Baekhyun. I’m good, thanks for asking. What about you?” Your grandma said.

“You know, fulfilling the society standards.” Baekhyun said sarcastically and your Nana chuckled. Baekhyun followed her laugh but once he saw you, he got quiet and looked at you astonished.

“Wow y/n. You look beautiful” Baekhyun said in shock. “It’s not that you looked awful the other times I have seen you. I meant that you look more beautiful, if that’s possible” Baekhyun said hastily. You laughed at him. “I knew what you mean Baek. Don’t worry and thank you for the compliment, you look handsome too” You said and smiled at him. 

He looked at the floor, his cheeks turning pink in embarrassment. “We should go. It’s getting late and we have to be there before the adults arrived since we are in the opening act” Baekhyun explained.

“Ok then. Have fun children and Mr. Baekhyun, I’m trusting that you will take good care of my grandchild” Nana said and looked at him straight in the eyes. “Of course Nana. I’ll look after her the whole time and bring her back home safe and sound” The brown haired boy said and help you getting inside the car.

You greeted Joseph and look out the window “Thank you Nana. Have a good night” you said as the car was moving and you and Baekhyun waved her goodbye.

On the way towards the venue Baekhyun and you were chatting. He told you he had come up with a story for you to tell in case anyone started questioning about your presence at the ball. “So, basically you want me to pretend I’m someone else” You said to him.

“Yes, a distant cousin to be more precise” Baekhyun said to you.

“Ok, but there are no chances that someone there noticed I’m not from your family?” You asked him.

“No. They only know the family from my mom’s side. We would say you are my cousin Josephine from my dad’s side” Baekhyun explained. “And said cousin exists?” You asked him confused.

“Yes! I have only saw her twice but all the information about her is real. Her parents names, the school she goes too. Even that my uncle and aunt are in a business trip in Nova Scotia” Baekhyun reassured you. “I hope I remember all of it” you said worryingly.

“You’ll be fine and if you don’t remember something I’ll be there to help you. I won’t leave you on your own” Baekhyun said confidently. You looked outside of the window and saw the city’s hall building where the ball will take its place. “Ready?” Baekhyun asked you as he was stepping outside of the car. You sighed and nodded.

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“Where are they? They should be here by now.” Chanyeol muttered to Jongin. He was scanning the room in search of you and Baekhyun but he haven’t found you. There was a lot of people already inside of the ballroom and more coming in through the doors.  Boys, Girls and some grown ups were scattered around the room chatting and getting ready for the Opening dance.

“Calm down. They should be here in any minute” Jongin said to his friend.

Your brother looked around the room. He was feeling nervous about being surrounded with all of this unknown people. His gaze settled on a group of girls standing not so far from them. They were looking at his direction and saying something in a secretive way, giggling from time to time. He averted his gaze and focused his attention back on his friend. “Tell me again how I’m going to entered the dance” Jongin said. Chanyeol looked at him “you will stand with the second row of boys. Baekhyun will be standing next to me in line so when the musicians say we have to switch partners, that’s your cue to get inside the line, you will be Chloe’s partner, I’ll be y/n’s and Baekhyun will be the another girl’s.” The tall boy explained.

“You really think this through huh?” Jongin asked him rhetorically.

“It’s brilliant, I know” Chanyeol said smugly “I came up with it while I was getting ready”.

Jongin snorted “And how do you know y/n will not get paired with someone else?” He said teasingly.

“It’s maths Jong. According to how this is danced, she can only do it with Baekhyun, with you or with me” Chanyeol said matter of factly.

“If you say so” Jongin said, not believing entirely on his best friend’s words. “I know so” Chanyeol said confidently. He looked again at the doors and felt his heart skip a beat.

Baekhyun was walking inside with you by his arm. In Chanyeol’s mind you looked stunning with that dress that complimented your figure and the warm smile that have always adorned your face. You were greeting people politely and laughed light-heartedly at something that Baekhyun had said. Chanyeol got lost on his thoughts until he heard the people in charge of the ball telling everyone to get ready since the show was about to start.

Boys and girls took their positions in the center of the room when you looked at Chanyeol standing next to Baekhyun. You couldn’t take your eyes off of him, he was looking so handsome with his black tuxedo and white shirt. He had his comma hair, a style you have thought it look good on him. He is so handsome you thought and shook your head almost immediately to clear you mind.

Stop y/n! Right now is not time for you to think about him. Focus on the dance you scolded yourself mentally. Chanyeol turned to look at Baekhyun and you and greeted you both.

“Hey” was the only thing he said and Baekhyun answered the greeting. You send him a small smile and waved slightly at him.

“Good evening. May I have your attention please” an old man said “Welcome everyone to this year’s founders ball. Tonight we are here to celebrate our City’s foundation and what better way to celebrate it than this” The man looked at everyone around the room and continued with his speech “as all of you should know by now, we will begin with the Opening dance and later on we will have music and food to carry on with the celebration so get comfortable and watch this remarkable boys and girls representing your families”.  The man said and everyone cheered.

The music started playing and you moved to the rhythm of it along with Baekhyun. It was a slow song, so you didn’t have a problem with keeping the pace. It felt like you were leading Baekhyun instead of him guiding you. You looked around the room. Everyone was moving so graciously and in sync that you were amazed by it. You noticed Jongin between the crowd and lost your balance for a moment. “Oh! Watch out” Baekhyun said to you quietly as he grabbed you firmly so you wouldn’t trip.

“What is he doing here?” You asked confused.

“Who?” Baekhyun asked you.

“My brother” you said and Baekhyun looked around confused.

“Where is he?” Baekhyun asked but you couldn’t answered him because in that moment the musicians order for all of you to switch partners. 

You spun around and felt someone grabbing your hand. You looked at Chanyeol with wide eyes. Your friend smiled at you and put his other hand between your back and your waist. You felt your cheeks turned red and averted your gaze from his face.

“What is my brother doing here?” You asked him quietly.

“He came here as my companion” Chanyeol answered you.

“Oh! And you two couldn’t tell me about it sooner?” You said upset that you had to figured it out.

“It was a last minute decision” Chanyeol said matter of factly and you shook you head.

“What do you think about the ball so far?” Chanyeol asked you as you two were swaying across the floor.

“Well, sure it’s something different from what I had in mind” you said.

“In what sense?” Chanyeol said curiously.

“I have thought that people wouldn’t pay a lot of attention to the opening act since you and Baekhyun had said they focused on other things but everyone in this room is looking at us”. You said as you scanned the room.

“That’s because they think they had spend their money well” Chanyeol said and you lifted you gaze to see him. “What do you mean?” you asked him intrigued.

“The committee chooses the people that is going to participate on the opening dance but every family has to pay a fee so they let the boy or girl dance” Chanyeol explained and spun you.

“That’s crazy. Why would someone pay for dancing?” You said incredulously.

“Because they believe it’s an honor if you get chosen. It means that your family is considered important” Chanyeol explained. You sneered at his comment. “They really know how to spend their money stupidly”.

“Couldn’t agree more” Chanyeol said, smiling mischievously at you.

“Y/n I wa...” Chanyeol was saying but you shushed him.

“I’m not Y/n.” You said quietly.

“What?” The black haired boy said confused.

“My name here is Josephine.” You explained and Chanyeol frowned at you. “Baekhyun’s idea” you explained and Chanyeol shook his head. “Fine. Josephine... I wanted to...”Chanyeol was starting to say but the musicians requested for another partner switch. You loosen your grip on Chanyeol’s hand but he tightened his around yours. You looked at him, he looked hesitant at letting you go. With a heavy sigh he released your hand and you went to your next partner who happened to be your brother.

“Hello Sis” Jongin smirked at you.

“What are you doing here?” You asked him.

“ Doing our friend a favor” He said nonchalantly ”Are you enjoying your night?” He asked you as you two were moving to the rhythm of the music.

“It has been... odd.” You said. “What about yours?”

“Same but all in all I have to say it has been interesting” He said thoughtfully.

“Who’s Baekhyun treating you?” Jongin asked you. “Do I need to have a talk with him?”. You laughed in amusement “It’s fine. He has treated me well” You reassured him.

“Still, I will keep an eye on both of you” He said seriously.

“Same goes to you. I have noticed some girls can’t keep their eyes off of you” You said amusingly. “You’re delusional” Jongin scoffed and you grinned at him.

When the music ended, you and your brother separated while the crowd applauded. You bowed to each other and Baekhyun appeared next to you. He greeted Jongin.

“Hi mate! Good to see you here” Baekhyun said and gave him a handshake. “Same” Jongin said politely.

“What are you doing here?” Baekhyun asked you brother as Chanyeol and his cousin approached you.

“Chanyeol asked me to come. You know, for moral support. Right buddy?” Jongin said and gave the tall boy a pad on the back. Chanyeol frowned at Jongin but nodded in response.

“Hey!” Chanyeol said to Baekhyun.

“Hey Yeol! Are you good?” Baekhyun asked him awkwardly. This was the first time they were talking since their argument. “Ahh... yeah. What about you?” Chanyeol asked him.

“I’m good too” Baekhyun said and averted his gaze towards Chanyeol’s cousin.

“Oh, you must be Chloe. Nice to meet you. I’m Baekhyun” the brown haired boy greeted the other girl.

“Nice too meet you Baekhyun. Thank you for remembering my name since my cousin does a lousy job at introducing people” Chloe gave a pointed look at Chanyeol and smiled at Baekhyun.

“Oh! That reminds me. She is y/. Josephine” Baekhyun stopped himself from saying your real name. “My cousin”. Chloe extended a hand at you for a handshake “Nice to meet you Josephine”.

“Nice to meet you too Chloe” you said and gave her a nervous smile.

“I’m sorry to say this but you two don’t look alike very much” Chloe said to you and Baekhyun. “That’s because she’s a distant cousin” Baekhyun laughed nervously.

“Actually you remind me of some other girl. Haven’t we met before?” Chloe said thoughtfully at looking at you. “No” you rushed to say “This is my first time here in town”. You explained hesitantly. “Oh Chloe, I think my aunt is calling us” Chanyeol said abruptly. “I saw her on the corner near the stage, we should go and look for her”. “But We...” Chloe was protesting as Chanyeol grabbed her arm and started pulling her towards the crowd.

“It was nice to meet you Josephine. See you Baekhyun” Chanyeol said out loud as the were walking away. “That was close” Jongin said. “You almost say my real name” you said to Baekhyun.

“I know. I slapped myself mentally on time” Baekhyun said relieved. “Hey y/n. My father wants to meet you if it’s ok with you. He know everything since he was the one that told me all the information about Josephine”. Your gaze went from Jongin’s face to Baekhyun’s in concern.

“Don’t worry, my dad is cool. My mom not much but she’s probably chatting with some other ladies” Baekhyun said to you in a comforting way. “Ok” you said hesitantly.  Jongin squeezed your arm as you started walking “I’ll be around” he said again. You nodded and walked away with your friend.

“Hey dad! I want you to meet y/n. The friend I talked to you about” Baekhyun said at his father. The man looked in his early 40’s. He was dressed with a black tuxedo as most of the man in here. His features were very similar to your friend's. He smiled at you.

“At wonderful! Good evening young lady. I’m B/F/N Byun, Baekhyun’s father. Nice to meet you ” Baekhyun father said and gave you a handshake.

“Good night Mr. Byun” You said shyly.

“I have heard good things about you. Maybe we could talk for a little bit” Baekhyun’s father said.

“Of course sir” you said rapidly.

“Oh but first let me thank you.” The man came closer to you and Baekhyun “you know, for not letting my son be the laughingstock of all this people”. He said quietly for only you three to hear.

“Not at all Mr. Byun. His son is a good boy and my friend too” you said and smiled at Baekhyun.

“I know. That is why it makes me proud to know that he is picking his friends well” Baekhyun’s father said solemnly.

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An hour has passed since the last time Chanyeol had seen you. He had wanted to talk to you since the dance ended but it had not been possible since you were talking to Baekhyun’s father and he was involved in a conversation that had bored him since half an hour ago. He was checking up on you from time to time but the last time he turned to look at you, you weren’t in that place anymore so he glanced over the room and saw you walking out from one of the doors that lead to the gardens.

“Excuse me but I have to go the restroom” Chanyeol said quickly and went after you.

You were sitting on a bench, in front of the garden’s fountain and were looking at your feet. You felt tired, hungry and your feet were hurting like crazy after so much time walking with those heels.

“Guess I’m not good for all of this after all” you said to yourself and looked at the sky. You felt so overwhelmed and tired from all the people you had met tonight and for thinking carefully every word that came out of your mouth. You knew that your life was very different from all the people inside that building that wasn’t a servant. You have thought about it as if you were a character from one of your favorite books but you never imagined you will feel a heavy load at playing someone else.

“Jo” Chanyeol called for you by your fake name but you didn’t turn back. He walked towards the bench and sat next to you.

“Hey” he said, making you jump in your seat and chuckling at your reaction.

“You startled me” you said agitated.

“Sorry” he laughed. “You get scared so easily”.

“It’s not funny” you frowned at him.

“For me it is” Chanyeol said teasingly. 

You went quiet and Chanyeol cleared his throat. “What are you doing here?”.

“I needed a break from all of that” You sighed and motioned at the ballroom.

-You could still heard the music through the open doors that lead to the gardens. There was some people near them chatting nonchalantly too so you had decided to sit as far from them as you could-.

“I know that feeling” Chanyeol said, bringing your attention back to him. “They only talk about trips and businesses and how much they spend on things they will probably use one time”.

“Yeah. I mean, I know you and I are different but I have never felt bad for it. With those people there was a moment when I felt ashamed for not knowing about the things they were talking about” You admitted.

“You shouldn’t feel like that. You know things that they don’t, that I don’t know. You read a lot, I would dare to say that even more than a lot of the people there and that also increases your knowledge. Maybe you don’t know which is the best dress shop in Paris but you know about their writers and poets and so much more. That’s something worth to know” Chanyeol said and smiled you. You looked into his eyes an smiled at him.

“Plus we aren’t that different anymore. My family is bankrupt remember?” Chanyeol said sarcastically.

 “Oh yeah” You trailed off “I’m sorry Yeol. I haven’t asked you if you were ok after that”.

Chanyeol gave an intake of breath “I think I’m ok” He said and looked at the ground “Oddly enough I don’t feel worry about that. I will be able to go to college still so I think we are not that bad and in all honesty I feel kind of relieved” He explained.

“Why?” You said curiously. “Because now I don’t have a fortune to take care of and I think my father won’t put pressure on me with that. Not until I finished college I suppose” Chanyeol said and gave you a side smile.

“I don’t know what to say” you said honestly “Only that I hope that you will be happy”. You gave him a sad smile.

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Baekhyun was looking for you across the room. He had to go to talk to his mother and when he came back to the place he had left you, you weren’t there anymore. He bumped into Kyungsoo, his classmate, and the other boy frowned at him.

“I’m sorry Kyungsoo” Baekhyun said apologetically.

“It’s ok” Kyungsoo said calmly.

“Hey, have you seen the girl who danced with me, passed by?” Baekhyun asked him.

“No. Is she your girlfriend or something?” Kyungsoo said curiously.

“No, she’s my cousin y/... Josephine” Baekhyun said hesitantly.

“You two don’t look alike. She’s pretty” Kyungsoo said bluntly. Baekhyun gave him a pointed look “Yeah. Everyone here have told us that. She’s a distant cousin”.

“I see” Kyungsoo said. There was a commotion not so far from them and both turned to look at it. They saw a bunch of girls whispering and squeaking in excitement. Baekhyun tried to see if you were one of them but he didn’t recognize you amongst the little group. “What is all the fuss about?” Baekhyun asked intrigued. Kyungsoo followed the gaze of those girls and groaned in annoyance.

“It’s about the new boy over there” The dark haired boy said and gestured towards the boy that was standing near the staircase. Baekhyun looked at him. -The boy, probably his age, was tall and good looking. He had serious features and looked bored. He was talking with another boy without paying attention to any of those girls.-

“Who’s that?” Baekhyun asked him.

“I believed his name its Sehun. From what I heard he is the nephew of Mrs. Oh who’s over there” Kyungsoo said and pointed at the woman who was talking with Kyungsoo’s mother and other ladies.

“She is moving into the house next to mine. She will be our neighbor” Kyungsoo explained. -He and Baekhyun had been neighbors since the brown haired boy and his family first arrived. Early this year the family that lived on the other house next to his had moved out and now there would be another family in it. The Oh’s- “And his Nephew too?” Baekhyun asked the other boy. There was something about Sehun, if that was really his name, that he didn’t like it much.

He has an unfriendly face. Baekhyun thought

“No. My cousin went to investigate as much as she could about his life and apparently he’s studying overseas.” Kyungsoo said smoothly. Baekhyun nodded in understanding.

“Well, I’m gonna keep looking for my cousin. If you see her can you please tell her I’m looking for her?” The brown haired boy asked him. “Yes” The shorter boy said.

“Thanks. It was nice talking to you. We should do it more often” Baekhyun said cheerfully as he was walking away.

“We’ll see” Kyungsoo said and took a sip from his fruit punch.

 “I don’t think I could be happy since you and your family aren’t coming with us. I tried to convince my father to use my college tuition to take you all with us but he refused” Chanyeol said sadly.

You looked at him stunned “you did that?”. The tall boy nodded slightly. 

“That’s very kind of you” You said baffled and Chanyeol laughed. “I wasn’t meant to be kind. You, Jongin and Nana are very important to me. I didn’t want to leave you” Chanyeol said.

You squeezed Chanyeol’s hand “And you are very important for us too”. You assured him. Chanyeol looked at your hand above his and lifted his gaze to meet your eyes.

“Y/n” he said without faltering his gaze.

Ok Chanyeol the time has come, man up! He thought to himself and continued.

“I have to tell you something and God knows I have tried for so long but for one reason or another I wasn’t able to but I can’t keep it inside of me anymore”.

You frowned at him in confusion “ok” you trailed off. “What is it?”.

Chanyeol let out a big sigh “I like you” he said and you looked at him wide eyed. “I have liked you for a couple of years now. That’s the reason of my jealous behavior when you wanted to watch the play with Junmyeon or the night we argued about Baekhyun inviting you to the ball” Chanyeol confessed.

“I...” you were in utterly shock.

“You are one of my best friends but I want to be more than just your friend and I need to know if you feel something for me.” Chanyeol said while looking intently at your eyes, as if they had the answer he was looking for.

You were nervous and your mind had problems with processing all this information. Chanyeol liked you, he actually liked you and he wanted to know if you felt the same way.

Your mind went back to all the times he has made your heart flutter but also there was the fact that eventually he will go away and you were afraid that your love for him will grow to the point that it will make unbearable his absence. The hope in his eyes was fading away and sadness was taking its place instead.  That was what encouraged you and even with the fear of you getting heart broken in the future, you said “Yes”.

Chanyeol looked at you wide eyed “What?”.

“I like you too Chanyeol” you said quietly. A huge smile spread across Chanyeol’s lips and you couldn’t help but smiled back.

“Are you serious?” Chanyeol said as he took both of your hands in his and brought them closer to his mouth to kissed them. You nodded.

Chanyeol got closer to you and put a hand over your cheek.

“I’m going to ask because I don’t want to get smacked with a broom by you” Chanyeol said, remembering the warning you had made him years ago the first time he kissed you. You laughed at the memory of that time.

“Can I kiss you?” He said quietly. Looking at your lips and lifting his gaze so he could see yours.

“Yes” you said nervously. Chanyeol lower his head and leaned over a little so he could reach your lips. As his face was coming closer you closed your eyes. Your lips were parted, waiting for the moment in which they will join his. You thought it was taking a lot of time when suddenly you felt his lips over yours.

  Thank you for the support and the love. I hope you like this new series and enjoy this chapter. Sorry because it’s too long. I think they are getting longer and longer hahaha. I’ll try to keep it down. Also, I’ll try to come up with the next one as soon as possible. If you have any comments regarding this chapter  feel free to send me a message. I think it would help me a lot.^^

[issaxcharlie]

Story: Messing with the stars

Chapter 1

Bobby

I always end up here. It is as if her voice drags me back. It’s a miracle that no one has noticed how often I sit here to see her.

She finishes rehearsing, I grab my backpack and race to the parking lot to catch up with my friends.

Lottie, Gary, Lucas and Hope are waiting for me in front of Lottie's car.

"Bobbycakes, where were you?" Lottie looks annoyed, the others just get in the car.

“Sorry, Lottie. Mr. Hughes wanted to talk to me about my homework.”

My eyes move like magnets to her, like every single day. She has her dark brown hair tied up in a beautiful braid. Her green crop top matches her beautiful eyes perfectly. She laughs as she walks home with her best friend, Kassam. The two quickly bonded over their love for music and had being inseparable ever since.

“Bobby, are you listening?” Lottie brings me back to the real world, she looks angry. But decides to just get on the wheel. I walk into the passenger seat and turn to see her beautiful face one more time.

“Did you hear that this time it will be obligatory for us to participate in the school play this semester? It will directly impact our Drama class. ”

Everyone sighs in frustration.

“Why are we taking Drama again?” Asked Gary, clearly annoyed.

"Is mandatory this semester, an attempt by the school to make us more creative and versatile, or something like that." Says Hope, somewhat disinterested. After all, she is known for being good at whatever she does. She doesn't mind leaving her advanced math class for a semester in order to recite some lines.

"It wouldn't be a bad thing if I had to kiss that beautiful theater freak." Gary is smiling, definitely imagining himself in that situation. Gross.

“Alison Light?” Wow, Lucas seems to have been paying attention to her too.

"Hell yeah mate, she’s gorgeous." Lottie rolls her eyes, and Hope dramatically changes the conversation.

Alison Light, aka Sunny or Sunlight. (Or at least that's how I would call her if I had the guts to speak to her.) Everyone else calls her Ally, and I'm embarrassed to say that my friends call her theater freak.

There is a rumor, that Sunny's dad passed away 5 years ago. Her mom found a job in London, so they had to move from Scotland. Alison took refuge in music, which has always been what she loved the most, entered the choir, the school band, each play, whatever was involved with music, she did it. That's how she earned the ‘theater freak’ nickname from everyone else, especially, Lottie and Gary. Unfortunately, everyone listens to Lottie and Gary.

I came to school a year later. Lottie immediately thought I had the potential to belong to her group, to this day I have no idea why. She told me that if I wanted to belong, I had to be around people with potential, and when Sunny approached with vibrant eyes and a huge smile to introduce herself, Lottie pushed her to the side, and made fun of her for having a 'crush' on the new kid and behaving ‘desperate’.

I didn’t defend her. I followed Lottie down the hall, and didn't turn to see her even once.

Every day when I see her in the hallway I wonder why I chose a scary stranger instead of the girl with the most beautiful smile I have ever seen, and the conclusion makes me quite embarrassed.

I chose Lottie because I was tired of being the kid everyone made fun of regardless of the consequences, the one who was just a joke. The boy Caitlin Evans cheated on by pretending she wanted me to be her boyfriend just to humiliate me in front of the whole school. I saw the opportunity to be someone different, and I took it. Letting go not only poor and humiliated Bobby, but also the opportunity to meet Alison in the process.

The next day I walk with the boys to the auditorium. Most of the students are already there. The music is quite loud, and her perfect voice immediately reaches my ears. As we get closer I can finally see what's going on. Kassam and Alison are doing a duet of the song "Into the Unknown" which in my opinion is not easy to sing. I’m annoyed to admit that they sound perfect together. Their harmonies are beautiful and their notes are totally clean and well placed. All of us who do not normally belong to this class, have our mouths open.

“As you could hear, this class has talent to spare. I will not accept less than what I know you can give. Everyone will sing a part of the song you wrote me yesterday on the list.” Mr. Hudson loves music as much as Alison, and has been an important person in her life for the past few years. He has always been kind to me, and has invited me multiple times to participate in his plays due to my and i quote ‘charming personality ’.

Auditions started. Surprisingly my friends did a pretty decent job. I would not choose them as the protagonists but they were not bad.

I always wanted to try theater. I've been watching it for years, since I've never missed a play by Alison, no matter how delusional it sounds. And I always liked singing, but believe me or not, I have stage fright. Also, even if I sang, the chances of me beating Kassam in the lead are microscopic.

"McKenzie, let's go. I have a feeling you will do a good job, I am excited to hear you.” Mr. Hudson, I honestly hope I don't fall off the stage while I go up, for me that will already be a victory.

The music starts playing, but I am unable to open my mouth. I turn to meet her green eyes, which for the first time in years seem to speak to me. She tries to tell me to focus on her, and I do. The song starts again, and this time I manage to start singing the words, which sound more whispered than anything else.

"Of your kiss, your touch, your love" Sunny starts singing with me, everyone turns to see her, but she seems determined to help me sing this song. I remain somewhat fearful during the chorus, and she takes the second verse like a queen. Focusing on making me feel comfortable, still staring at my eyes and taking my hand.

Suddenly, she is the only thing I can see.

The connection I felt the first time I saw her feels stronger than ever as we dance together across the stage, our voices sounding perfect next to each other, like they're meant to fit together.

I'm definitely not half as good as Kassam is, but without a doubt my connection and chemistry with Sunny is much stronger, or at least that's what I want to believe. A man has to have hope. It was a magical moment, like when Troy and Gabriella meet and sing 'Start Of Something New' together. Don't judge me, I saw her with my sister Gemma.

The song ends and everyone is shocked. Lottie seems about to pass out, and Lucas looks at me in disbelief.

"I've found my stars." Mr. Hudson whispers, his eyes lit up.

"What? No way! They were supposed to be solos, not duets ” Lottie yells, clearly about to lose her patience.

"My decision is final. I've never seen so much chemistry, it's like they were meant to be together. ” Seems like I'm not the only one who thinks so. I knew Mr. Hudson was a smart guy.

"This work is going to be the best we have ever done, I assure you." Sunny blushes slightly, we are still holding hands, and I honestly don't feel like letting her go, but she starts to pull apart gently.

"Thank you, Sunny." I whisper, she looks at me with mischief in her green eyes. That's when I realize what I said. WE ARE NOT NEAR THE STAGE OF NICKNAMES, GOOD ONE IDIOT.

"Omg, I'm so sorry, Alison. I, You probably don’t even know my name and I’m calling you by a nickname, this is so embarrasing.” I start to mumble things that I don't understand myself.

She smiles at me, trying to calm me down. "It's okay, Bobby McKenzie. Professional joker, awesome baker, beautiful eyes. From Scotland, just like me.” She emphasizes my name, so I have no doubts that she knows who I am. And I almost passed out with the beautiful eyes thing. Fuck, she's so sweet.

“Sunny sounds adorable, I was getting tired of theater freak anyway. And like Mr. Hudson, I could see your full potential. You just needed a hand.”

I blush, hard. She likes it. Both the nickname and the fact that she made me blush. I can see it on her face.

Lottie grabs my arm and starts dragging me toward Hope to leave.

This time I don't let history repeat itself.

"I'll see you tomorrow... Sunny." I wink at her, trying to sound and look as cool as possible.

She smiles. "See you tomorrow, partner."

[punkscowardschampions]

Janis & Grace

Janis: I'm coming back Janis: like, I'm en-route now Janis: so you can tell the parentals or whatever Grace: okay Grace: fine Janis: 👍 Janis: tah Grace: sure Grace: literally don't mention it Janis: alright Janis: forget I was even here, like Grace: ugh that means I don't wanna talk to you Grace: you can stop now Janis: Charming Janis: not asking for fanfare, or a shit banner, don't worry Grace: 🙄🙄🙄 Janis: if you don't wanna talk, you can shut the emoji keyboard and all Grace: whatever Grace: so sorry I'm busy being your PA rn Janis: how hard is it Janis: I did it in three Janis: even you can do it in under 10 Grace: I'm actually home so no, I can't Janis: well that's on you for being there and them for being annoying Grace: just leave me alone Janis: fucking hell, fine Janis: make your mind up Grace: I have & so have you Janis: what are you chatting about Grace: I called you SO MANY times Grace: until I literally couldn't cos Iggy said I had to call dad Janis: I weren't looking at my phone Janis: you know I can look after myself Grace: Duh Grace: but like you said, how hard is it, babes? Grace: like, 1 text you know Janis: Defeats the point of fucking off if you're gonna make a song and dance about it Janis: you wanna be my keeper or don't you Grace: I wanna know you're not fucking dead in a ditch Janis: You do now Grace: yeah thanks Janis: Look, I don't have to tell you my every move Janis: when do we text Grace: idk what you think I can say to that Janis: I'm just saying, you didn't need to freak out Janis: no need Grace: how dare you Janis: what Janis: I'm trying to save you the hassle it clearly is Grace: literally spare me this convo Grace: you're not this stupid Janis: Whatever then Janis: this is bollocks Grace: yeah exactly Janis: no, you Janis: don't pretend to give a fuck just 'cos mum and dad are getting on your nerves Grace: mhmm that's what this is Janis: yeah Janis: easier faking it when I ain't about Grace: I was totally crying so hard that I threw up cos I was worried about mum and dad giving me a lecture Janis: don't start Grace: I told you, leave me alone Janis: don't try and guilt trip me Janis: I'm literally on my way, can't do fuck all else Grace: don't tell me I'm pretending to care Grace: or pretend that you're coming home Janis: What's the point Grace: again idk what I'm meant to say to that Janis: Exactly Janis: I don't have to step over the threshold for it to fucking count Grace: you don't want to Grace: you literally could care less about me Janis: behave Janis: you don't wanna talk to me, we're hardly gonna hug it out Grace: like you're SO !!!! to talk to me Janis: I started this convo Grace: to get me to get mum and dad to be less extra Janis: yeah 'cos give a shit about them Janis: they're chewing your ear off, not mine Janis: so either way, I'd be doing you a favour Grace: wow Grace: thanks so much Grace: you obvs don't care about anyone but him so Janis: Oh yeah, cheers for spreading that about Grace: you've done that yourself, babes Janis: You don't know why I left, you never have, so don't be chatting shit Grace: excuse you, I haven't said anything to anyone Janis: he showed me the texts so you have Grace: that doesn't even count Grace: I didn't say anything he doesn't know Janis: clearly does to me Janis: as he's the only cunt I care about Janis: you didn't have to do that Grace: yeah well I was drunk & thought you'd gone forever Grace: sorry, okay Janis: you didn't know what you were talking about Janis: whatever, sorted now regardless Grace: duh Grace: I said he better get you back, you're back Grace: we know the boy can listen Janis: yeah, he just did it 'cos he's well scared of you Grace: I didn't threaten him, I'm not you Janis: ehh Janis: debatable Grace: oh please Janis: weren't exactly miss sweetness and light but alright Grace: he didn't deserve me at my sweetest or lightest thank you Janis: I told you, you got it wrong Janis: it weren't like that at all so Grace: she got it wrong, not me Janis: yeah Janis: he didn't fuck her though Grace: obvs! why would he? Grace: she knows nothing about camera angles and that's literally what she was there for, she probably gets her sex position tips from Cosmo Janis: probably Janis: clearly got community service for stalking anyway Grace: someone totally attacked her for whoring all over their man & then it was a whole thing™ Grace: like nobody wants to hook up with you if you're that tragic & so white you're basically see through, sorry about it Janis: Fair, Asia gets through 'em pretty well Janis: don't be catty, like Grace: cos she doesn't get her sex tips from Cosmo like a grandma duh Grace: & anyway he's like totally into you, boys aren't totally into Asia Grace: not the ones she picks Janis: hadn't escaped my notice Janis: cries as much as you Grace: RUDE Grace: I wouldn't cry over a boy that cringe Janis: 👌 Janis: least you have something in common Grace: OMG don't even Janis: you're mates, you're meant to Janis: or would you rather be like blondie and Mia Grace: 🙄🙄 Grace: that's not how you mean it Grace: I'm not THAT stupid, hun Janis: didn't say you were Grace: copy & paste it from literally any other convo from the last decade Grace: whatever Janis: you're well paranoid Janis: so, she got a new one yet or what Grace: idk I've been totally preoccupied wondering if you were still alive Janis: 👎 boring Grace: stop doing it to me then Janis: it's as much about you as it is him Grace: it doesn't have to be about me to effect me Janis: soz Janis: why would I help you, yeah Grace: if you ever did it'd be an event Grace: & I'm not dressed for one so Grace: 🤷 Janis: 🙄🙄 Janis: it ain't gonna happen so don't plan an outfit on my behalf Grace: 💔 obvs but I won't Janis: Good stuff Grace: 👌👌 bye Janis: you gonna say sorry Grace: no Janis: 💔 rude Janis: shouldn't call people names, Gracie Grace: you shouldn't run away from your problems, babes Grace: but like here we are Janis: What's your plan, going well? Grace: Why would I EVER tell you anything I'm thinking? Janis: Yeah, have to be thinking something first Janis: I get it Grace: sure Janis: 👋 then Asia Grace: don't Janis: 😏 Grace: I have no energy to be upset any more Grace: so just stop Janis: Then try a smile Janis: there's nothing to be upset about Grace: not for you Grace: & what are you an old man on a bus? telling people to smile is so gross Janis: It's old Janis: you're bored, we all are Janis: switch it up Grace: go away Janis: stop being boring Grace: literally what do you care Grace: annoy your boyfriend Janis: who knows Janis: might stick around if you weren't Grace: that's not funny Janis: it is though Grace: you really scared me Janis: stop worrying about me, jesus Grace: Oh my god, do you think I wouldn't just stop if that was a thing I could do?! Janis: it is Janis: ask me how much I think about you Janis: you don't need to, you told me, I don't Grace: again, I'm not you Janis: try harder Grace: I hate you Janis: 👍 Janis: there we go Grace: next time I hope you don't come back Janis: 🤞 eh Grace: yeah Janis: be back for dinner then Janis: get da to make my favourite Grace: he'd have to know what it is first Janis: yeah Janis: pretty shit ain't he Janis: sad times Grace: like I said, my energy's dipped too low for this Janis: best go lick a stamp Janis: perk you right up, Ells Grace: that's not a comparison anyone's making Grace: but thanks anyway Janis: should be Grace: maybe but mistaken identity never Janis: no shit Janis: no one's mistaking you for kate moss either but you understand what I meant Grace: totally Janis: thank fuck Grace: any more shade you wanna throw or can I go? Janis: huh? Grace: like can that be it now or? Janis: I don't give a fuck, babe Grace: cool Grace: such a fun catch up Janis: not at all Janis: go back to crying and vomming though Janis: sounds like a blast Grace: obvs Janis: oh, and don't ever try and stick up for me again, also obvs Grace: 👌👌 Janis: state Grace: I won't speak to him again, it's fine Janis: good Grace: 💜 Janis: ugh Janis: fuck off Grace: [does]

[igotshinee21]

Dear Jonghyun,

A year. That's what it's been. I still can't believe it. You have everyone around the world missing you and crying and praying that you're ok. It seems like just yesterday I was 5 sitting in front of the TV in my grandmother's house watching SHINee's debut stage. All I could focus on was you. It took my grandmother having to pull the Korean news channel up on her computer for me to go eat breakfast and get ready for the day.

I couldn't stop watching you. I knew you were singing for your Noona but I. I felt like you were singing for me. You were smiling but looked so focused on the dance that you just radiated 'LOOK AT ME IM THE BLING!' and I just remember asking my grandma who you were and she reads the Hangul going across tbe screen and says 'Kim Jonghyun' and that's when I fell in love.

That whole day I went through Kindergarten class singing Replay and all the kids around me called me names cause they spoke English they didn't understand who you were or how powerful you were. You made a 5 year old have standards for guys that I shouldn't have had.

I went home that day still humming it and went inside. I went on the computer and just searched you and then I saw you. The next few years went by. I fell more in love with you by the day. But after you debuted and became my center the worse took place.

My step dad the person who I was to go to for comfort and feel protected by began to abuse me. Every night I would lay in bed crying and wondering why a now 6 year old had to go through this. I started sobbing and the only thing that calmed me down was you. The smile that your face brought and the twinkle your eyes shown. I laid in bed everynight thinking of you begging you to come get me from the life I was living.

The abuse got worse. I was 7 with depression and having to steal my mom's makeup to cover up bruises. That's when I started having panic attacks and hyperventilating. The one night I couldn't breathe and had to go to the hospital but the doctor asked me if I had a way to calm down and I said yes. Music. And more specifically SHINee, you. He played like 3 of your songs and watched as I went from on the brink of passing out to dancing to replay.

He told me that it was because of you I was breathing and hadn't died of oxygen lack. So I left happy. But the abuse didn't let up. If anything it got worse. He used you guys against me, told me I was getting punished cause you guys saw me as a disappointment. But I knew it was a lie. You guys brought a smile to my face every time I thought of you. But when I turned 10, that's when I turned to you for the late nights in the bathroom. When the only relief was self harm. After a while of sitting there you talked me into putting the blade down and cleaning up and that I could make it cause your voice gave me hope it gave me a safe place. Weeks later I was in the same spot though. Except this time I wanted to end my life. I sat there crying and didn't move. No one was home. But my iPod started playing randomly and the first thing I hear is you. Your voice came through the headphones clear as day. I fell asleep on the bathroom floor feeling like I was gonna be okay because I felt like you weren't gonna let anything happen to me. But of course he had other plans. He took most of my innocence and told me if I told a soul I'd get in so much trouble. So I kept my mouth shut. Now 2014 comes and I'm turning 11. I'm in the 6th grade and it's November. Thanksgiving time. next week and a half is hell for me. my grandma dies and you know who helps me cope??? You.. you let me cry myself to sleep thinking I was gonna be okay.

YOU WERE MY HOPE

YOU WERE MY SAVIOR

YOU WERE THE ONE WHO SAVED ME

But of course let's rewind some of 2014. You became 'Blue Night's radio host and every day it never failed I'd listen. Even though I didnt understand much your voice got me through the everyday life.

Now 2015. By this time I had tried ending my life a total of 4 times. I self harmed more than what I wish I did and I became so wrapped up with my pain and the fear of people seeing me weak I was diagnosed with Smiling depression. The same thing you had. But you held me through all the pain and suffering. My mom leaves my step dad. And actually right now in 2018 shes in the process of divorcing him.

We move down south from New York to Georgia (USA). I was afraid of people making fun of me that I barley listened to kpop. I was so absorbed with not getting put an outcast I almost lost you. But you still were there. The nights I cried. The nights I have like tonight where i just hurt and don't know how to fix it.

2016 rolls around and I lose it! You release you're she is album on my birthday and I felt like the luckiest girl ever. I called my grandma and told her how you wrote she is for me. And yes at the age 13 i swore we were soul mates. I had ever since I was 5 so why stop?

And then 2017... I lost sight of you. I barley kept in touch with what SHINee and you were doing. I knew you stopped hosting. And y'all dropped a Japanese song (GET THE TREASURE IS A BOP! But so is every SHINee song) i was so focused with school and sports I lost sight of you. Then I moved to where I am now. And face more shit. I was sexually harrased the first 3 months I moved here, I stared self harming again and pulled all nigher just so I wouldn't have nightmares. Then December 18th comes. I wake up to my friend blowing up my emails and feed with the news. I was lost deviated shocked numb. I couldnt feel anything. You were my everything. My rock. The reason I kept fighting. And I couldn't help you from the thing you helped me from.

I didn't do anything for the next two weeks. I was of course numb. I did the bareminimun. I barley ate. I didn't sleep. Then I cried non stop in my room. I couldn't let everyone know I was hurting. My family didn't even think there was something wrong with me cause I hid the pain so well. I mean I became so good at looking okay people just assumed I had the best of everything.

January 1st came and I didnt want to do this. I didn't want anymore tomorrows. But as I sat in my room crying over you I heard it. The same thing I heard every time I cried like that. You told me id be okay and that you'd always be there. Then for some reason I couldn't stop wanting to see you. Every SHINee video I watched. Every video of you I watched.

I haven't read your letter or watched the funeral. I refuse. I guess I'm afraid it'll make it like official official that you're gone and that I have no choice but to say goodbye. But I don't wanna say goodbye you became my reason for fighting. The reason I rolled out of bed. The hope that life was gonna get better

I wish I could have helped you. I'm so sorry. I just hope you're okay and happy and not hurting.

You did well bling bling. I'll post more later today. It's just gonna be my favorite moments of you. You and SHINee. Always and forever.

I hope the words I could never say reach you. 'THANK YOU'

(just some people on insta paying tribute)