#its been literal ages im sorry :sob: | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

pascalslvt · 1 year

Text

Tangled Alliances

Summary: When faced with sickness in your community in an already post-apocalyptic world, it is up to the strained professional partnership of you and Joel Miller to embark in a perilous and difficult journey in order to retrieve life-saving medicine. With your destinies intertwined, shrouded in tension, you confront the unforgiving challenges of your environment together, gradually forming an unexpected bond. Will that be enough?

Pairing: Joel Miller x fem!Reader, f/m

rating: 18+, minors dni

series warnings:, pre!ellie, during outbreak, set in TLOU 2022, age gap (28 & 52), swearing, mentions of violence, also actual violence, mentions of sickness, heavy angst...., fluff, trial & tribulations, severe weather, a lot of fucking animosity and hostility, enemies to lovers ???, infected people, tension...TENSION!!!, bickering, copious amounts of alcohol, inebriation, y'all don't get along...but y'all also have to, smut!!!!...a semi-slow burn, anxiety, exhaustion, NO USE OF Y/N.

chapter warnings: Mentions of backstory (involving the death of readers parents), bickering, bad langauge, tess is mother, mentions of sickness and death, aclohol, sharing a tent (wink wink), cheeky morning wood, just a sprinkle of smut if you squint its not really smutty but not completley clean, bad luck ??, tension. lots of it, intrusive improper thoughts.

word count ≈ 8,3k Estimated reading time: 37 minutes, 4 seconds (225 wpm)

a/n: This is the first part of a series i am writing!! I haven't actually written fanfiction since i was like...15, so be very very kind and gentle and patient with me because i am literally just a girl.....i have dusted off the cobwebs & busted my writing out of its retirement to create a story to quench my current joel miller obession. This storyline is actually inspired by a dream i recently had and i am very excited to reeeeally get into the series as i have a lot of plans that i cannot share with you right now.... also sorry if the tags are wierd i gennuinely have no idea what the fuck to write. Part two will come pretty shortly (don't get used to it) because after i awoke from the dream i literally wrote almost 20k words in one sitting so im splitting it up and giving this one some time to see if people are even interested in reading more...please enjoy!!!!!!

Part One: Hostile Beginnings

You were nearly seven years old when the outbreak started. To you, the world crumbled before your feet in what seemed like an instant - shattering the very ground on which you stood. One day after school, you saw your own mother's jugular be ripped straight out of her neck from the mouth of your neighbor, an old and fragile woman who used to babysit you from time to time. Before running away in fear, you saw your mother bleed out, right there on the lawn you used to play in. You never saw your father that day, and neither did you ever again. You always accepted that your father's fate was that he most likely died in that little cubicle he worked in. Or that he now spends the rest of his life infected. Whichever the case, it doesn’t really matter to you, you don’t think about him anymore.

You got away with your life by the skin of your teeth that day. That little girl ran until her tiny legs could carry her no more. Your English teacher, Theresa, had found you in a ditch, sobbing. You had been wearing the same outfit you did that day in class, a purple shirt with a flower on it, along with some blue pants. Theresa didn't have the heart to leave the little girl behind, so she took you under her wing.

Throughout the years, Therese - or ‘Tess’ as you liked to call her - taught you how to survive this very unfortunate world disaster. While you were still young, she taught you to crawl into small holes to retrieve food or water, and to hide whenever you felt something was wrong. She taught you to trust your instincts. She taught you to be resilient. Resourceful. In later years, you were taught to use a gun, to mend knifes, to defend yourself - how to navigate this apocalypse safely.

When you got older, Tess made use of you in her line of work. Smuggling. And you were good

This is how you got to know the man named Joel Miller. A cynical, gruff man of very few words. But, he always got the job done. You and Joel didn’t interact much. Now that you think about it, you hadn’t met him more than.. what? 5 times before today? even less so had you spoken with him. Tess didn’t want you to work alongside Joel as she believed his methods could sometimes be…taking unnecessary risks. He could sometimes be reckless. And you were not a risk she was willing to take. Not yet.

Ever since finding that shattered little girl all those years ago, Tess always felt an unwavering, deep sense of responsibility to keep you safe. She owed it to you, and she owed it to your parents. You were now a full-grown woman, 28 years old - and Tess knew you had a strong head on her shoulders. With the years, the fierce overprotective nature gradually softened. She gradually unfolded her wings of trust, and sent you out on more and more jobs. But, it wasn’t until recently that she felt comfortable enough to let you work with Joel. Nothing big, none spanning more than a day or three. To her dismay (but yet also relief), the two of you ended up ultimately proving to be an incredibly efficient team. However, the two of you could not get along even if your very life depended on it.

It was a silent alliance. It had to be. Otherwise, you’d end up getting on each other's nerves and damn near kill one another. Joel always made it incredibly clear that you weren’t friends - he wasn’t there for pleasantries, he was there to finish a job. Not that you objected. The less condescending shit you had to hear him say, the better. You didn’t care much, either way. You were a professional - after all, you had done this since you were a child. This was your reality. You never had much choice.

Lately, a lot of people in your community have fallen very, very sick. It is some sort of pulmonary bacterial infection that starts off with a fever, and will leave you coughing up blood a couple of months later. A slow killer, but a killer nonetheless. Some of the older folk have already started dying.

“No, absolutely not, Valerie” you heard Tess’s voice come from downstairs. You just happened to walk past to hear it. “It’s way too risky”. These words piqued your interest. “She is our best option, and you damn well know that” Valerie, a woman you live and work with says, a stern undertone in her voice. You slowly walks towards them, walking down the stairs without making a creak, eavesdropping.

“This would take months to complete..” Tess sighs, adding in, “We don’t even know if we have that kind of time, folk’ are already dyin’. We don't even have no idea how heavily surveilled it is”

“Do we have a choice? We’ll run out of our own supply within a month if we’re lucky. They will all die”

Tess is quiet, you could almost hear her thinking if you listened hard enough. You enter the room, “What’s going on?” you ask

Tess stands still and shares a look with Valerie before looking at you, sighing and crossing her arms. “We have received intel that there is a massive supply of vital medical equipment as well as medication, medication that we need. It’s In a settlement controlled by some sort of… faction. They call themselves the ‘reclaimers’. Nasty bunch. We need the medication, and well.. If our sources are correct, which they haven't failed us before, it’d be enough to not only cure the folk round here; but we could also sell for an enormous profit. We could make a lot of money. Maybe buy a new truck. Supplies. Guns….”

“I’m in.” you say, without hesitation, cutting her off. Tess shakes her head, she opens her mouth to speak, but you interrupt her before she can “I can manage myself, you made sure of that.”

Valerie looks at Tess with a ‘I told you so’ look. “You’d have to walk for, probably, months on end just to get there and back. They’re west, somewhere in Montana, located deep into the forest. You have never been on a mission that lengthy, and it's fucking cold as shit - and it's only going to get worse”

“What’s our other option here? Let people die?” you ask, and pause. They stay silent. “I wouldn’t accept if I didn’t know I was capable of handling something like this, Tess….”

You look at each other for a long time. She knits her eyebrows together, somberly, and shakes her head. She doesn't know if she can let you do anything like this. Not because she doubts your ability - rather, she cannot get herself to put you in that type of danger.

“You heard the woman…” Valerie says smugly.

“Fine”. Tess says, slightly annoyed and probably feeling very protective. “I need to stay here and take care of some things, keep track of the radio and such.. Valerie needs to tend to the people here. It…It would be you and Joel.”

This takes you slightly aback. On one hand, even though Tess might think his methods are unconventional - she trusts him, and you trust her. Besides, you have worked professionally very well before and always get the job done. But on the other hand…it’s Joel fucking Miller.

“Months on a job with Joel Miller? Fuck me…” You scoff. Tess’s lips curl into a slight smile evidently trying to hold back her laughter. She knows the kind of disdain you feel for him.

“There’s no one else I’d trust to send you away with on a mission like this. Except for me, of course” Tess says, leaning against a wall. “Are you still in, even if it’s him?” “Well.. i don’t really have a choice now, do i?” you say, and they chuckle. “When would we leave?”

Tess pauses. “You’d have to leave tomorrow” she studies your demeanor, waiting for you to opt out. Hoping in a sick, twisted way that you would - since that would mean that you’d be safe. You don’t hesitate. “He doesn’t know…yet. But, I know him. He would not turn this job down. Besides, he owes us too much, he can’t”

You nod. “Well…he’ll probably be as pleased with working with me as I am with him” you say, rolling your eyes.

“It’s about time the two of you get over that little feud of yours” Valerie interjects, you send her a warning look

“Ain’t my fault he’s fucking unbearable” You point at her, gesticulating your annoyance already brewing by the mere thought of him. She shrugs.

“I’ll call him on the radio - let him know.” Tess says.

“With her?!” You hear Joel’s voice boom down from the hallway, annoyance evident on his voice. ‘yup. i was right’ You think to yourself, chuckling as you’re eavesdropping from the other room. They start start walking towards the kitchen, where you are stood. When he sees you, he nearly rolls his eyes, stopping in his tracks. “Well. Looks like we’ll be partners.”

You smile tight-lipped, nodding and holding back an eye roll of your own - trying your best to be civil. “Seems that way”

“We leave at 8. ‘Expect you to be ready by 7 forty-five” He commands. You nod at his instructions. ‘One minute of a partnership, and he has already taken the leading role. Fucking jackass.’ you think to yourself. “Better get some rest”

“Yeah, no kidding…” You mumble to yourself, sneering. He gives you a warning look. One that says ‘don’t start’.

Knowing there’s no point in furthering this conversation as tensions are already high, and you have months to argue with him, you turn to walk “I’ll go pack then” You announce, turning around.

“And try not to piss me off” Joel says loudly as you walk away. You just hold up your middle finger and leave the room. “Real mature!” He scoffs as he looks at Tess with a look that says ‘can you believe her?’, she just shrugs.

That night you packed all that you would need - supplies, food, weapons, a tent…the everyday outing must haves in the midst of an active apocalypse, also…for the cold. Of course, you are not a total stranger to it, living here in Boston, but you also know that the cold here won't compare to the temperatures you are about to face - as you know walking through the north of the US in late autumn, early winter will not be an easy feat - and in a little tent, at that. It was estimated you would be gone for about a couple of months, at least - which is by far the longest job you’d ever been on. But, it was essential.

That morning you wake up particularly early, to make it a point not to be late. Wouldn’t want to give Joel the satisfaction of berating you. You can already feel yourself wanting to spite him. Tess helped you carry your things down, not that you needed help, rather she felt bad for sending you to do something like this. Capable or not, she had a …. Somewhat motherly instinct for you. She also gave you the map with the places you’re headed, where you’re meeting the informants, where the safehouses are located and so on - and gave you the same rundown as she did for Joel, keeping the both of you informed. You are now stood in the kitchen, with your things in your arms. She paused and looked at you, having trouble finding the words, feeling herself getting choked up by the reality of the situation. Before you can diffuse the fears you see swirling in her head, she holds you tight. “You be real careful of yourself, got it?”

“Yes m’am.” You say, voice slightly strained by the suffocating tight hold she has around you. She lets go of you, and cups one side of your face with her hand, and smiles with glassy eyes. She shakes her head as she takes a step back, as if to snap out of the sentimentality.

“Now go and get that medicine.” she nods, trying to sound emotionless and strong. You nod and turn to walk out the building. “Oh, and… give him a tough time. Joel, I mean” She laughs

“You know I will” You wink, as you finally leave the house. Tess stands there with an awful feeling inside the deepest parts of her. She was meant to be the one to protect you, and here she is; sending you off to a mission where she doesn’t even know the magnitude of the threat it poses to your life. But, it’s too late now. Way too many people are depending on you.

You continue walking out, as you lean against the truck parked outside. You’re not going to drive far with it, only 10-12 hours or so. They wanted to transport it somewhere else to sell (since the ongoing surge of illness has eaten away at your community fund), and since it was on the way Tess figured it would not hurt to cut down the length of the trip just a little bit. You stand there for a while, until you check your clock: ‘7:46am’. You snigger by yourself. Without noticing, Joel was walking towards you, gear in hand

“Right in time, for once” He mumbles.

“You’re the one who is late, Joel” You correctly point out.

“It’s one minute, stop yappin’” He says, walking over to the truck, throwing his stuff into it and getting into the driver's seat, slamming the door. What a cheerful man.

You throw your bag into the car “I don’t understand why you’re the one driving” you mutter, getting into the passenger seat

“You know exactly why. Now shut it before I rip off ‘ya jaw and shove it up ‘ya ass.” He says, matter-of-factly, putting the keys in the ignition, turning it and starting the engine, looking forward.

“Ooh, very kinky, Joel” You say sarcastically, taunting him.

He puts his foot on the clutch, as he shifts the gear. “Keep talkin', and I'll leave ya here.” he says and starts driving.

“If only I’d be so lucky…” You mutter silently, watching out of the window as he pulls out on the narrow road through the tall buildings, keeping away from the major roads as they are heavily used by FEDRA.

“I heard that” He said, pointing at his ear, eyes on the road.

“I’m glad your hearing is working, old man. Gives us a bigger chance of survival” you chuckle

“Old man?” He asks, insulted by what you said. “I'll show ya old man if you don't shut the hell up.”

You roll your eyes, and decide to sit this one out. You know it’s not worth bickering, as you have a long, long road ahead of the two of you. “That’s better” He said after a little while of silence. You roll your eyes once again, deciding with all your will and might not to respond with a snippy comment, as you didn’t want to give him the satisfaction of giving him the reaction he so obviously is searching for.

You two drive for hours and hours without saying a word, sitting in the thick tension that is between the two of you. It wasn’t necessarily a comfortable silence, rather a silence that comfortably didn’t mean you had to talk to him. After 7 hours, you can start seeing the shift in the sky, the colors indicating the impending sunset that's occurring.

“Maybe we should find somewhere to find shelter? Suns going down. “ You point out.

“I could work that out myself, thanks” He mutters. “We've still got a few hours left of daylight. Push on.”

“So I’m guessing your plan is that we sleep in the car?” You question, looking at him. He doesn’t leave his eyes from the road.

“Yup.” he says. Well, you couldn’t think of any better plan, to be fair. A truck is not a bad place to sleep given the alternative.

After about an hour or so, the car starts suddenly sputtering. “What the fuck?” Joel mumbles, as he quickly checks around the dashboard to see if there’s any indication as to what’s going on. You look over at him, quizzically. “Fuck!!” He shouts, hitting the steering wheel so hard that it honks, as the car comes to a halt. “That’s just…that’s just fucking great” He says, trying to restart the engine - to no avail.

“So much for your plan on ‘pushing on’” you said, looking out at the quickly darkening sky, mocking him. He looks annoyed at you, as he gets out of the car, to check the hood. When he does, a light amount of smoke seeps out.

Well, that sucks. But, you try to remind yourself that this truck was always going to be a temporary luxury, and you got 8 hours into the 12-hour trip. Oh well, more time with… Joel.. Sigh..

“Engines out” He grumbles, waving the smoke away from his face as he closes the hood again, standing and watching hopelessly at the car with one hand on his hip. “We’re not too far from the trucks drop off spot, guess we’ll have to walk the rest of the way.”

“So we just leave it here?” You ask

“Got a better idea? We’re in the middle of nowhere, nobody gonna steal it.” He answers.

“It’s your head, miller…” You mutter. He chooses not to answer to your snark.

“I say we still sleep in the car. It’s better than a tent.”

You nod in agreement “In the middle of the road?” You ask, looking at an already annoyed Joel. He grimaces, whilst he mocks what you just said

“No, you idiot, we’ll have to push it” he stated, looking around the road to see a good spot, and ended up pointing at a spot by some trees a couple meters from the road. “And it ain't an easy feat. Let’s see if you got the strength to push a two tonne vehicle, little miss”

You shrug. How bad can it be? Joel gets in the car and makes sure its gear is in neutral, as the both of you stand at the back of the car, starting to push. It takes some time, and Joel was right that it was, indeed, not an easy task. By the time you got the car by the trees you’re both catching your breath, Joel sweating profusely

“That wasn’t so hard, was it?” You say between breaths, holding your hands on your hips. He’s bent over in exhaustion.

“Oh bite me” He hisses. You try not to laugh. “We’ll have to leave it here, try to radio Tess somewhere along the way, so they can pick it up - at least before someone steals it”

You nod. It’s gotten dark, it’s time to sleep. So, you climb into the truck and start leaning back your seat to get as comfortable as you can. Joel does the same.

“So…” You say, breaking out the map. “We’ll have to recalibrate… it’ll be…what I'm guessing… 2 to 3 weeks to walk to our first meetup spot with the informants.” I sigh, already tired.

Joel nods. “I'll carry ya if ya get tired” He teases, looking over at you as he lays back in his seat.

“Right back at you princess” You answer without a beat, changing the pins in the map, folding it back and lying on your side, away from Joel. He smirks at your answer.

“Y’sure got a mouth on you” He says.

You roll your eyes as you close your eyes “night”, you mumble, ready to sleep.

“G'night” he lies back on the seat and put his hat over his face before falling asleep.

The morning after, you wake up in a stir. The car was very cold, and the sun was just rising. You look around, and find that Joel is not in the car. You blink the sleep out of your eyes, and realize he’s popped the hood to check if there's any way to salvage this car. He sees you move around your head and peaks on the side of the hood

“g’morning, darlin’” he smirks. Is he more annoying than usual or is it because you just woke up? You can't decide. You furrow your eyebrows. He chuckles to himself at how displeased you seem to be awake. You were, after all, never a morning person. “We gotta get movin’”

“Yeah, yeah..” You mumble, getting out of the car to stretch and go to the backseat to collect all your things. Sleep still in your system, the two of you start walking along the road. After a while, you opt to walking through some hills, as Joel got more and more paranoid of meeting someone on the road. You walked for what must have been…14 hours, only taking a small break to eat something small that Tess had packed, sitting on two different places and not exchanging any words. The sun started setting, the sky turning an orange tinge.

“We better find shelter..come on” He said, looking around and seemingly found a spot not too far away - yet secluded enough to sleep for tonight. He increased his walking pace in a determined manner. You follow along not too far behind. Suddenly he stops dead in his steps.

“Jesus fucking Christ” He whispered to himself, anger and frustration very, very evident in his voice

“What?” You ask, eyeing him a bit worried about his reaction.

“God fucking damn it” He whispers to himself “Dammit - I forgot my tent. We'll have ta sleep in the open. Hope you ain't afraid of the dark…”

“Speak for yourself. I brought mine. I ain’t sharing.” You say, resuming your steps.

“You're a real treat to travel with you know that.” He says, looking at you stood still, frozen by his own frustration as he is kicking himself for forgetting that damn bag.

“I bet I am!” you yell, as you have managed to walk a bit further along than he has. He sulks as he continues walking.

You both decide on a safe spot to make a shelter. Joel and you start instinctively preparing to make a fire and collecting anything that will burn. To his dismay, a light downpour of snowflakes suddenly fall from the sky. You look up and laugh at the sheer irony of the situation, the frustration of the day just piling onto Joel. And it’s only the first day at that. “Ain’t that a bitch, huh, Miller?”

“Gotta be fucking kidding me” He groans. “That’s just great”

The two of you start a fire, and put two cans of soup on it for dinner. He is sitting against a rock, drinking whiskey, looking as happy as you could in his situation (spoiler alert, he is sulking). You are putting up your tent, which you dutifully brought (unlike Joel) and you pause as you catch a glimpse of the sad man who seems to be very stressed with the current predicament he has found himself in. He is visibly freezing his ass off. You feel strangely bad. He can't sleep in this cold…

“Look, miller” you pause, he looks at you. “You’re going to die in this cold. Let’s just share tents. Ain’t nun weird.”

He scoffs, and looks back at the fire, taking a sip of the whiskey “I'm good”

You sigh. “Stop being such a fucking Stoic and get over yourself. If you share your whiskey, I’ll share my tent” you say. Maybe by making a deal out of it, it’ll be easier for him to accept your help, you thought.

He thinks for a while. He weighs out his options, as if there is not only one he can realistically go with - which is to accept your help. “Fine. Half-and-half?”

You nod, somewhat happy that he accepted, yet less happy of the reality - which was that you have to share a tent tonight. “Half and half” You repeat, nodding. You walk towards him and sit next to him.

He gets another cup from his bag and fills it with his cheap, illegally brewed scotch, and passes it to you. “That’ll warm us up nicely” He said. It tastes like piss and firewood.

“Aye” You say. “How did you manage to remember bringing your whiskey, and not your tent?” You ask, with a slight hint of laughter to your voice.

He huffed. “Priorities” He smirked, turning to you.

“Well. I hope you have brought enough to maintain your end of the deal” you say, taking a sip. He silently lifts his bag, emitting a number of clinking noises, entailing he has probably got enough to last him weeks. Maybe a week now that you are involved.

“Seems like an unnecessarily heavy weight to carry” you remark, taking a sip of the strong liquid.

He stays silent for a while. “You’ll understand it soon enough” is all he says. Not knowing what he meant, neither caring all too much, you shrug and kept drinking aside each other in the dark silence. You eat the soup when it’s done, too. You pulled your legs to your chest to maintain more warmth, as it feels as though its getting colder by the minute, a few stray snowflakes falling onto the ground and quickly melting away.

“Didn’t think you were so damn sensitive to the cold” he suddenly said.

“M’not, it’s fucking freezing” you say, breathing out.

“Don't think I don’t see you shivering, princess” he says, with a sly smirk on his mouth

“Right back at you, princess” You say, mocking the way he said it to you. “Don’t fucking call me that ever fucking again, by the way”

“Someone’s a tad touchy, ain’t they?” He laughs, taking a swig from his whiskey

“Shut up, Miller”

“Why? M’igetting on your nerves?” he asks, sarcasm swelling in his voice.

“Always have been” You quickly retort.

“I’d say it’s mutual”

You nod, as you kept drinking. The whiskey has become a lubrication for the regular anguish you’ve felt in the presence of Joel. Now you felt no more than subtly irritated. The drunker you got, the happier you were of the deal you did with him. You kept drinking in silence, until you’ve drained about a quarter of the bottle - which might seem like a little, unless you calculate the amount of food you’ve ingested compared to the whiskey you’ve drank. Your cup is, once again, empty - and you guide the cup towards Joel, who dutifully fills it with more.

“Here ya go, princess” he says sheepishly, and you turn to give him a warning look

“I’m serious Joel, I’ll knock the teeth right out of your mouth if you keep calling me that.” You say, rather aggressively.

“I’d like to see you try” He snorts out.

You decide not to answer, as he is clearly getting a rise out of antagonizing you. You roll your eyes and chug the rest of your cup. So did, Joel.

He, again, filled your cup. “You seem happy I brought the whiskey. Like you could use some of it” He comments

“No shit. I’ve got two to three months on a mission with you. And it’s only the second night” you shrug. “Not to mention that we have to share tents…”

“I ain't that bad” He chuckles.

“You’re drunk” you add.

“So are you” he quickly responds.

You nod, and sit in silence for a while - both, quite drunk. “I’m fucking tired. You tired?”

You feel a bit loopy from all the alcohol, but stand up and agree, walking over to your tent. The closer you get to the tent, the more you realize just how small it really is. I mean, it’s small for just one person, imagine how cramped it is for two? Surely, the both of you cannot fit in there - what the hell have you gotten yourself into? You think to yourself.

Joel walks slowly towards the tent as he watches you look into the tent, worriedly. He looks himself, and the same thought passing your mind right now has suddenly dawned upon his, “Oh, boy….” he mumbled

“Yeah, I know.”. You are both stood there, looking, for a while - until you initiate and climb into the tent, and lie down on the right side - making as much space for Joel’s body as you can.

“This ain't gonna be comfortable, not one bit...” he says, as he lies down next to you in the tent, in a clumsy and stale motion.

Your bodies are uncomfortably pressing together, without there being enough room to move away, nor was there to shuffle to a more spacious yet also non compromising position. You tried lying back to back, as it seemed the natural and least intimate way to lie next to one another, thus facing away from one another. Still then, there wasn’t enough space to spare personal space - not in this tent.

“God this sucks.” you mutter from one side.

“You got that right.” He answers from the other.

You groan, as you try to get comfortable, nudging your elbow into his back in the process. He huffs out of pain. “You're making it worse.”

“Shut up. I’m just trying to get comfortable” You say, feeling an unrest in your body - one that the whiskey was not strong enough to numb.

“So am I” He gets more irritated as you keep nudging into him.

Finally, you settled to lie on your side, facing away from Joel. He takes the newly found empty space and lies with his arms against your back. You groan. “Your arms are hurting my back” he does not seem to care, and stays silent. You finally give into defeat, as the mixture of the sleepiness and alcohol slowly seems to overtake your body and you both fall asleep.

Somewhere at night, you had rolled over. Joel was very warm, so naturally, subconsciously, you drifted closer to the source. With your face against his chest, he was softly awoken by the warm breaths coming out of your mouth, in small snores. He looked down, and saw you sleeping peacefully, right against him. He lied completely still, not sure if he should wake you up. The snores were not loud enough to keep him up, so he presumed that is the price he’ll have to pay to sleep somewhere warm tonight, so he tried closing his eyes and fall back asleep, repeating in his head not to look anymore at you - and just go to sleep.

Suddenly you wake up, the morning after, head plastered against Joel’s chest, with his arm slung around your body, and your arm slung over his shoulder. It felt comfortable and warm….strangely.. Good lying like that, but you didn’t know how to react. It was utterly intimate and had crossed the border to cuddling very long ago. And oh god…is that your saliva on his shirt? Did you drool on his chest?! You were so close to him that you could smell the stench of whiskey on his breath, no less your own bouncing from his chest and back to your nostrils. You were basically on second base with the man, without ever remembering if you fell asleep that way or if you had done it in your sleep. I mean hell, you barely remember getting into the damned tent…’we must’ve gotten very drunk’ you thought to yourself. You must’ve rolled over and not thought about it.

You lie frozen, unsure what to do in this situation. If you jerk too much, you’ll wake him - but if you don’t move… he’ll see what you are seeing as of right now - which is you two in an extremely compromising situation. Maybe you could turn around? But then it would border spooning…curse this god-damn tent!

As if awoken by your thoughts, Joel’s body moves as if he’s waking up - and in a hasty and rushed move, he jerks his arm away from you - as if he just went through the same train of thoughts you did when you woke up. “What the fuck” He groaned, looking at you in an.. Almost disturbed manner.

“Fuck.. Uh, mornin’..” You peep out, embarrassed. Kicking yourself for not acting faster before he woke.

“Morning” he says in a rushed voice as he looks around, slightly panicked. None of you know what to say, an awkward silence hanging over you. He is quick to peel away from you to climb out of the tent. “We gotta get going” he announced.

“Y-yeah” You say, sitting still in the tent, processing the situation. When you have mustered enough strength, you crawl out of the tent too - stretching as you stand up. You pack up and walk alongside each other in silence, might as well have been miles apart. The weight of your unspoken closeness from the previous night's ‘cuddling’ lingers in the air, you were both a bit thrown off, sharing the occasional glances at each other, unsure of how to address what had happened, or whether it was better left unspoken. There wasn’t much to say, to be honest. I mean, what was there to say?

You got quite accustomed to the silence, to hearing nothing but the sound of your footsteps, wet against the humid grass. You’d think that walking for hours on end without the distraction of conversation would be something that would bother you, it proved to do the opposite. Without it, It was as if the world around you had muted its colors and sounds, leaving only the barest minimum of sensory input - which made time somewhat fly by. The aching in your feet and legs slipped to the back of your mind. You wondered if Joel was quiet because he was doing the same.

You also wondered what his thoughts were regarding this morning, and how you woke up. You didn’t talk about it, that’s obvious enough…but, what was he thinking about? Maybe he didn’t think about it at all - it was, after all, innocent, you rationalized. Was he also trying to decipher the mixed emotions you were feeling without giving them too much weight - since that might make them real, after all? You can’t deny just how safe and comfortable you felt, regardless of who it was.

Joel spotted you glancing at him here and there, he was equally aware of the tension. He, too, couldn't shake off the memory; He couldn’t help but to replay the events of last night in his mind, wondering if it was merely a product of shared body heat or something deeper. I mean, he could have just pushed you away…yet the unexpected warmth of your body against his, the rhythmic rise and fall of your chest as you slept, your breath hot against his chest.. It had been an intimate moment, and he couldn’t help but…enjoy it. However, he was as stubborn as ever, unwilling to broach the topic nor delve into the act itself. Instead, he focused on the mission at hand, pushing the awkwardness aside, shaking his head, not wanting to think too much of it either.

As you continued on the journey, the trees began to thin out, and you found yourself standing at the edge of a clearing, the sun going down behind a mountain up ahead. You looked at Joel, who seemingly had the same thought you did - it was time to find shelter. He took the map out of his bag and looked around. “We aren’t too far away from a safe house” he grumbled.

You nodded, taking out a map of your own, trying to help him in the search of said safe house. As you slowly approach the road leading to the building the weather began to change. Dark clouds gather in the sky, and the first few raindrops fall, pelting against your clothes. The urgency of getting under a roof became more apparent, so you quickened your pace.

Your breaths are visible in the cold, damp air, and the water has seemingly seeped into your clothes - leaving you feel colder and heavier. The cold made your thoughts kept circling back to the tent. The unexpected warmth of Joel's body against yours.. ‘God damn it. Get a grip. it's not even day four, and you're losing your mind.’ You thought to yourself.

Finally, you reached the safe house, which wasn’t what either of you had hoped for. It was an abandoned decrepit building, a relic of the world before the outbreak, with a roof that had seen better days. It was a stone building, partially hidden away by the tall unkept grass surrounding it, as well as tall trees huddling around it, vines growing on the walls. It was probably old 20 years ago, let alone now… The building was leaking from the roof and had gaping holes in the walls - making the shelter far from ideal. It offered some protection from the rain, but not much else. It was, however, better than getting drenched in the pouring rain and being exposed to the elements. You closed the door behind you and took a moment to catch your breath, looking around.

“Well.. This is the best we've got for now” He finally muttered as the wind howled through the gaping holes in the walls.

You look around and find it was pretty empty. There wasn’t any furniture, just a chair. Floor filled with scattered garbage and miscellaneous, dusty items from people who have been here before. The water is dripping from your clothes onto the stone floor beneath you, creating a puddle. "We need to get out of these wet clothes," he finally stated, his voice practical and no-nonsense.

You knew he was right, but the timing of it made it slightly uncomfortable. He knew he was straining on the already strange atmosphere that has been looming over the two of you since you found each other in the brace of one other. However, you also knew the reality of the situation. Your pride was warring with the necessity of the situation. The chill in the air and the knowledge of the dangers of hypothermia prevailed, and rational thought found its way back to you. You have months left to travel with Joel - and undressing in front of him to ward off sickness should not be an embarrassing thing, it ensures your survival and should be nothing more - is nothing more.

He could see the hesitation in your eyes, as you shivered, teeth chattering. He looked around for any dry fabric he could find within the safehouse—tattered old blankets and worn-out jackets. It wasn't the most comfortable solution, but it would have to do for now. He picked up a jacket. “Here.”

You nodded in agreement and began peeling off your drenched attire. Joel did the same, his back turned to maintain some semblance of privacy. Finally free from the soaked garments, you are quick to put on the jacket, zipping it, covering your body enough to feel more comfortable. You start wringing out the excess water from the clothes you wore, leaving a puddle of water there. You avoided even looking in the direction of Joel, who you know is (most likely) currently butt naked. Instead, you find a moth-eaten blanket in a corner of the room that the rain hadn’t reached. Shivering uncontrollably, you wrap it around your waist, covering your exposed legs. You could see a not so naked Joel who had found some pieces of clothing to cover himself, thankfully. He was now hanging his wet clothes against the singular chair that he moved to one of the few dry spots in the house, so you opt to do the same. The room was still far from warm, and the leaky roof didn't help matters, but, at least you were in dry clothes, if you can call them that.

You spot the ever so tiny wood burning stove in the corner of an empty adjoining room. You check if there’s any wood in there, and to your surprise there is - however, not much of it. Enough for tonight, and that’s all that mattered. You started a small fire and quickly huddled up against it for warmth. Joel walked into the room, as he’d seen the light from the fire from the corner of his eye. He nodded in approval as he silently walked towards you, sitting down next to you to also keep warm. You both sit there in silence, waiting for the clothes to dry.

Joel broke the silence, his voice softer this time "We'll have to wait out the storm here, and then we can continue our journey." You nod, agreeing.

As the night wore on, the humidity in the room strangled the feeble fire you had managed to kindle earlier, ultimately snuffing it out. The temperature inside the safehouse plummeted, and it became apparent that you couldn't rely on the fire for warmth any longer “Damn it” You mutter, shivering once again, trying to revive the fire - to no avail.

What was also apparent was that the two of you were so obviously treading around the one thing you knew would help warm you up, very much proven by last night. Unsure, feeling awkward, you didn’t know if you should bring it up. Proudly, you both sat there in silence. The memory of the previous night and the warmth that entailed lingered in the back of both of your minds. It had been an unspoken but undeniable source of comfort in the midst of the harsh world you inhabited, and now, with the cold seeping into your bones, and the urgency to get warm overtaking the awkward tension looming over you, the thought of that shared warmth became impossible to ignore.

Without saying a word, you shifted closer to Joel, seeking his body heat. Joel, initially surprised, looking over at you, understood the unspoken request and shifted to accommodate you. It was an unspoken agreement, a silent acknowledgment that you needed each other's warmth to survive the harsh, cold night.

With a shared understanding of practicality and mutual vulnerability, you created a makeshift sleeping area consisting of zipped up sleeping bags, dry blankets and whatever else fabric you could spare that would dampen the solidity of the cold, damp floor. This was where you settled as you finally lay side by side. You tried to find a comfortable position, mirroring the way you had slept in the tent the night before, with him against your back. Your bodies pressed together, and your breaths synchronized in the cold darkness, neither of you speaking about it, rather you let your bodies instinctively gravitate closer, seeking the heat that the other provided.

In the quiet of the night, as you shared body heat to stave off the biting cold, the tension that had lingered between the two of you began to seemingly fade. Despite the uncomfortable surroundings and your strained relationship, you both found a strange comfort in your shared warmth and the familiarity of each other's presence. There was no need for snark, nor sly remarks; pissing each other off. Neither did you have to discuss the somewhat uncomfortable, albeit innocent yet necessary, situation you’ve found yourself in. The cold was unforgiving, and your priority was to avoid hypothermia. You were, after all, nothing but two survivors making the best of the harsh and unforgiving circumstances given to you, finding solace and comfort in each other's company, even if it was unconventional.

He hesitantly kept his arms to his side. Joel broke the silence, clearing his throat, his voice barely a whisper, "I never thought I'd miss that damn tent." trying to diffuse more of the tension.

You slightly laugh, feeling a slight cramp in your body from the duress of the situation. The laugh eased up some internal tension you didn’t even know you were holding onto. “It was for sure warmer than this” You chuckle.

He smiled. And that was that. You were both admittedly exhausted, and drifted off into a very well-earned sleep, lulled by the heat radiating between the two of you. Secretly, you couldn’t help but to wish for the extra warmth that came from his arms around you, as it did yesterday, holding you impossibly close, keeping you safe in his big strong arms. Little did you know that he was thinking the same, but it was simply a line that Joel couldn't bring himself to cross. You had already navigated enough awkwardness and unspoken emotions that night. That didn’t stop him, however, from subconsciously doing so in his sleep - just as he did the night before.

Morning came, and you were awakened by the sun shining through the window, and onto your face. To your surprise, you felt your body be wrapped in the warmth of Joel's embrace. He must have instinctively put his arm around you whilst he slept. At first, you felt a sense of contentment. It was strange, but also undeniable. It was a reassuring feeling, knowing that he was there, holding you tightly - just as you had secretly hoped. But, as your senses fully woke up, you became acutely aware of something else - a firm pressure against your back that couldn't be ignored. You froze, your eyes widening in shock, and your heart raced as you registered the presence of Joel's erection pressed against your back. Joel was still asleep, as far as you were concerned. His breath heavy and warm on your shoulder, light snores leaving his mouth. Your mind raced as you tried to process the situation. You two had already crossed so many boundaries during the night to stay warm, but this felt like an entirely different kind of boundary altogether. Was this intentional? Or just a physiological response to their proximity?

Was there a sick, twisted part of you that engulfed your mind with fantasies of alleviating the pressure burning in the pit of your stomach with the (from what your back could feel was a very appropriately sized) dick prodding at your back? Yes. You were only human, after all. Were you going to do anything about it? No. You knew this was not intentional, not realistically. You’re a grown woman and know that he couldn’t control it just as much as you couldn’t control your deep guttural reaction to such an… event.

You debated over your next moves, unsure of how to navigate this uncharted territory. If you move away, he will wake up, realize he has a boner and think it scared you off. But if you lie there, hoping it goes away, and he wakes up with a raging boner still in full swing rubbing against you - he’d be mortified. Him, being a proud man would never live that down, and would probably not talk to you again, or at least not know what to say, in the midst of his own embarrassment. After yesterday, and the progress you made in your ‘partnership’, you couldn’t help but to dread the deafening silence that came with the impending awkwardness. You’ve been through so much already, and have yet to even get close to finishing this mission. So much left yet to go through. You have crossed so many bridges, this is just one of them. This was just a fleeting moment and not as significant as it might feel in the heat of the moment. It’s not a big deal, not really, just bodies doing body stuff. Or at least that is what you are telling yourself.

Carefully, you adjusted your position ever so slightly, shifting your body away from his rock solid member to relieve the pressure between your bodies, all the while ensuring that you didn't wake him from his peaceful slumber. It was a delicate maneuver to maintain the pretense of sleep, but you hoped it would be enough for you to potentially feign ignorance, just in case he was awake. You, flustered by the situation and the thoughts lingering in your (albeit perverse) mind, could not fall back asleep. Rather, you lied there letting your thoughts run wild. Couldn't hurt to indulge into harmless fantasy?

A couple of moments later, you could feel shifting next to you. Joel slowly woke up, feeling the oh so familiar throbbing that welcomes him in the mornings from time to time. Joel comes to his senses as he gently wakes up, quickly remembering the way he fell asleep against you and how much of a compromising position that would be for him right now. He quickly snapped his eyes open to see, to his relief, that you had moved away in your sleep, or at least so he thought. ‘Phew’ he thought to himself. He quickly sprung to his feet, leaving the room - hoping it goes away before you wake. He was not entertaining the idea of taking care of it, it could be too risky.

Him waking up reminded you of his existence, which filled your lust driven mind with an enormous guilt and shame regarding your thoughts. He didn’t have control over that, and your insatiable mind went and ran with it. You quickly shook the thoughts off and tried to think of something else as you laid there, unsure how to proceed..

You laid still until you heard Joel packing his bag. You took it as an indication that you were out of the woods, and had dodged a bullet - even though the both of you are flustered by it, without the knowing that the other one knew. You get up, and start folding the cloth and blankets that made up your ‘bed’, and walked out to the room with the bags and packed. Joel didn’t say anything.

“G’mornin’” You announce your presence. He, already hyper aware of it, hums as a response. You don't look much into it, relieved he isn’t treating you differently considering last night's sleeping arrangements. When you packed up, you put your backpack around your shoulders, your rifle around your neck and the rest of your gear clinging to the bag. You look at Joel, who is watching you as you pull the straps of the bag. You look up and nod. “Let’s go?”

He nods. You’re off.

#pedro pascal #joel miller #joel miller x reader #joel miller fanfiction #joel miller fic #the last of us hbo #tlou hbo #joel tlou #tlou serie #tlou series #the last of us #joel miller x f!reader #light angst #light smut #joel miller x you #here goes nothing

63 notes · View notes

dreaming-of-mossballs · 21 days

Note

hii so I'm like a super ultra silent reader of your content bc I am deathly afraid of my liked posts showing up on my friends' feeds. but I had to somehow let you know that even though you seem to be having some sort of burnout and unhappiness with your writing, as someone who's very very picky about what writing I even enjoy, your writing style and skill is definitely some of my favorite on the app at all. I totally understand being unhappy with your own work since I'm an artist too (albeit a visual artist so, not quite the same here but the idea applies), and I can relate to being unsatisfied with whatever it is you're putting out there. but basically, I just wanted to let you know from an outside view, your writing is extremely eloquent and well-put-together and organized. you can tell your writing is created with a lot of thought and time put into it, which is why it's so easy to enjoy. and side note, I LITERALLY haven't been able to stop thinking of your last post since I read it yesterday which almost never happens 😭. honestly even though there's like 5 gepard fans on here so he gets practically no content from anyone, I'd still prefer to have your writing carrying the "fanclub" of sorts over a large crop of posts from lots of people that isnt very well-done or thought about. I know you said this recent post may be your last one for a bit, so please, PLEASE take your time with whatever's next!! your stuff is always very much worth the wait ❤️ and please do take care of yourself and don't push yourself too hard.

(by the way, you totally don't need to post this on your profile or respond to it at all, I just wanted to send in some kind of message about it since as I mentioned, my paranoia prevents me from interacting with your posts directly 😞)

CRYINGB UGLY SOBBING OMGOMGOMG

It surprises me when people say I don’t need to respond because I can’t keep such a nice note to myself 😭 but I do the same thing when I’m sending asks so I totally get it (I’d get this tattooed on my forehead if no one stopped me)

i had NO IDEA I had a super ultra silent reader so this was an absolute joy to get. There was a post I saw earlier about how in fandoms, it’s either you talking with a small group of friends or your door is open and people come in and listen to you ramble. I’m definitely the latter. I’m so fortunate to have so many people invested in my story lol, because like most things I write, they start off as daydreams in bed. I’ve never written one out before, but I’m SO GLAD I DID.

And honestly, if I were to release something the quality I wanted it to be, it would take ages of rereading and refining. Unfortunately im not a very gifted writer, but all the practice I’ve gotten due to being obsessed with gepard has helped me a bit. I just have to remember that haha

Some less coherent thoughts

ITS EASY TO UNDERSTAND???? YAY IM SO HAPPY AHHHHHHHH

i actually based my style off the wings of fire series, i don’t know if y’all are familiar with it, but the introspective humor was so fun to me as a child. (Also I love using Chekhov’s gun as a crutch I’m sorry guys) it also stemmed from the worry that readers wouldn’t be able to visualize what I was picturing, so that ended up in a LOT of describing scenes early on. With no metaphors so it was just like. (Y/N) set the cup down, (Y/N) put the laundry in the washer, etc. hahaha it makes me laugh looking back on it

it also makes me absolutely kicking my feet giddy that it’s invaded your brain. I love giving people brain worms and inflicting emotional damage on them. And gepard ALWAYS shares posts with other Hsr men like. The absolute middle child treatment. But I’m glad I’m doing my part to bring something to the table that’s different than the usual 1k words he gets sandwiched in between five other people.

it makes me so so happy you think my writing is organized and well thought out, because I do put a lot of thought into it!

I’ve run out of words to say but i might come back to this to ramble pfft

i hope that fic gives you a good supply of serotonin for days to come 🩵🩵

#Even though the last fic kinda flopped by my standards #I’ve gotten more compliments for it than almost any other one #besides the first date one and the sic fic but that was natural given their nature #I honestly didn’t like this one at first because it was so ambitious #It had action and angst and all of the above #And a LOT of insecurity #I felt so embarrassed cuz I’d done the (Y/N) IS WORRIED ABOUT WHAT PEOPLE THINK plot like three fucking times #And if I remember correctly I made them get over it in like 15 seconds in BFABC 1 #I also didn’t think the fic was funny enough #And (Y/N) also throws up and gepard nearly dies #I wanted to show in this fic that (Y/N) isn’t a perfect person #But I get we all need a main character fantasy sometimes bahaha #I read self insert manhwas so I’m definitely guilty #Mossball_Thoughts #Mossball_Asks

4 notes · View notes

navstuffs · 1 year

Text

Chapter 1

Pairing: CEO!Ezio x GN!Reader

Summary: You finally decide to let it loose, only to discover the man you had a one-night stand with is now your CEO.

Warnings for this chapter: modern au!, self-depreciative reader, awkward reader, some smut, alcohol drinking, comedy

Author's Note: hello, this is my first project for a long fic in a very long time. im very nervous and excited and i will appreciate all feedbacks i get! thank you so much for reading and lets go!!!

You hate clubs. Loud music. None or barely any good warm food. You can barely see with those lights. Too many people in the same place, rubbing on each other. You remind yourself you were there for support: your best friend and co-worker Elena called you crying that Saturday night, sobbing her girlfriend of five years broke up with her. Elena needed to party and, for some reason, needed you there for support. Until Elena didn't anymore, finding comfort in a very tall curvy redhead lady, the two disappeared on the dance floor.

You wonder if you should go home or at least make good use of the money you spend to get into that place. When was the last time you went to a club anyway? Oh yeah, when you turned into the legal drinking age. By the way, you got drunk with two tequila shots and swore never to drink again. Ever. You have always been known to study and work a lot anyway—no time to fool around.

You find the bar on the club's second level, far from the dancing area. Happy you finally found a chair for your butt to fall into, the bartender asks what you want, and you reply, "Everyone's favorite?".The song doesn't blast as loud, and the people here seem calmer. Good.

At least if you were going down, you could have some fun. Two cups maximum. The bartender places your drink in front of you, and when you give her your card, she waves, pointing at someone.

"Gentleman over there already paid."

Blinking surprised, you turn to where she is pointing and have to hold your lips together. Man is literally a fucking Greek God. He is well dressed, wearing black social pants and a black social shirt with a few open buttons. You can see a tiny bit of his hairy chest. He has a trimmed beard and a smirk on his lips. You look down on yourself, wearing simple clothes. Could it be a prank? Maybe. What if it was roofied? You were getting drugged, and he was stealing your kidney?

Well fuck it. You said you weren't going to have fun? Having fun has its risks.

Grabbing the cup, you toast the man, and his smile grows wider. Well, he is staring at you like he is going to eat you. It has to be a prank-oh shit, he is coming your way!

"Is this seat taken?" The man asks with a deep voice. You nod, wanting to say no. He sits by your side, requesting another drink from the bartender. "Name is Ezio. Yours?"

You tell Ezio your name, sipping your drink. Now that he is closer, you notice he is strong. He wears his hair in a ponytail and has a smile that is a lady killer. And he smells good. Unlike all the smelly people in this place, Ezio smells reeaallly good.

"Thank you for the mhm drink," You say, and Ezio waves his hands like it was nothing. "I must tell you, I am not in my best shape. I'm unhealthy. Diabetes. Cholesterol is high. I might have a heart attack at any moment now."

"You don't look sick," Ezio looks at you confused.

"Appearances, right?" You giggle awkwardly, drinking your drink at once. Ezio seems to ponder for a minute before nodding, a funny smirk on his lips.

"I am sorry for your situation. I hope you get better soon."

"Oh, I will be fine. Every time I go to the doctors, they change the prospect. Anyway, I would be a bad product in the black market."

"The black market, you say?" Ezio's voice tone is humorous. You nod excitedly, asking the bartender for another drink.

"You seem happy for someone who might die any moment now?"

"Oh, you see. It is life. I try to live every day as if my last. Because it could be."

When the bartender gives you the other drink, you swallow, this time much easier. You start hearing a loud laugh coming from Ezio. You look at him, your turn to be confused.

"What is it?"

"I am not selling your kidneys in the black market," Ezio laughs. You blink a few times, charmed by the sound.

"That, that is exactly what an organ dealer would say!" You exclaim, and Ezio laughs louder, attracting looks from nearby.

You roll your cup between your hands, looking down. Your tactic didn't work, and you weren't roofied. Maybe just a little drunk. You decide this will be your last cup of the night.

"I am sorry. I shouldn't have laughed like this. Your concerns are valid," Ezio declares. "That is not the reason why I paid for your drink."

"Oh?"

"I find you attractive."

Now it is your turn to laugh. You hit his arm, murmuring right right, finishing your second cup.

"What is it?"

"You find me attractive? You? Me? Pdffttt."

Ezio gets his chair close to yours, closing the distance. That shuts you off.

"Can I not find you attractive?"

"Do you use glasses, sir? You might need them."

"Do you have a problem with people finding you attractive?"

"No, I have a problem with extremely hot people finding me attractive!"

Wellllll, shit. Your damn open mouth. Ezio smiles victoriously.

"So you find me attractive?"

"Well, duh. I mean, look at you. Then look at me."

"An attractive and desirable person?"

You shake your head. It had been a long time since someone had shown any sign of interest in you. At least, so direct like that. Indeed, Elena said people looked at you with desire left and right, you just didn't want to notice.

"Look, mhm, this was very nice and all, but it is not nice to play with someone's feelings like that," It is the alcohol. It has to be. It is what you will blame tomorrow.

"I am not playing," Ezio's tone brings a chill down your spine. He looks at you like he wants to have you right here and now. On top of the bar counter in front of you, everyone. And deep down, you would let him do it.

You first think about what you came to do here: have fun with your best friend, but she was busy with someone else. You already spent money anyway, accepted the drink from a handsome strange man, called him an organ dealer, and he is still showing interest in you.

He could have any of those other sexy people around you, but no, Ezio seems genuinely interested in you.

Getting up from the chair, decided, you pull Ezio by his shirt into a kiss. It surprises you both, but he is fast on kissing you back. When you two break apart, Ezio holds your face.

"Is this what you truly want?" His tone is serious, just making you want him more.

"If you are still interested."

-x-

Monday, 6:30 am

You wake up, your body still sore. You get up from your bed, getting a good look in the mirror. You had sex. It is screaming in your relaxed stance. You had sex with a freaking Greek god on the back of his car, had lots of orgasms, and bonus: no organs lost. Maybe except your sanity.

You hop into the shower, remembering Ezio's hands on your back and ass. He touched you all over. He was generous, ensuring your eyes rolled numerous times during the night. You had never done it in a car before, and he was patient until you finally got comfortable. Always making sure you were feeling good. Not that stopped Ezio from pounding inside you like a madman, making the car shake. The beard scratched against your skin every time he gave you kisses. And his moans, shit, you were trembling just thinking about it.

You realize your shower is taking a little longer than it should, so you turn into cold water. After drying yourself, having breakfast, and brushing your teeth, it is time to go to work.

You work for a winery corporate office named Auditore Vinos. It had recent operations in your country, primarily based in Italy. You enter the company's building, saying morning to your co-workers until you reach your table.

Elena comes running when she sees you, and you turn your face away, upset.

"I am sorry, okay? I am a horrible friend!" Elena apologizes, but you still have pouty lips. "I will pay for your lunch for a whole week!"

"Two weeks!"

"Deal. Seriously, I am sorry. I went crazy Saturday. Besides, if I didn't leave you alone, you wouldn't have gotten your brains fucked by—"

"Shhhhhh!" You look around but don't seem anyone else heard.

"You got to tell me! Everything! All of it!"

"I will, I will. As you as well! Leaving me all alone to make out with redhead Lady Dimitrescu."

"Word of advice? Watch out for whom you fuck. They might wake up in the morning saying I love you, marry me, can you meet my family like today?"

"Serves you right for leaving me alone."

Elena puts her hand on her heart, pretending to be insulted as you open your email. Your boss Mario Auditore has sent a meeting for the whole company at 10 am at the small reunion office. You ask Elena, but she shrugs.

"You know Mario loves those motivational speeches once in a while. To keep the moral of the team, we are his family, but we still could be doing better, blah blah blah."

At 10 am, you get together with everyone at the reunion office. Some people are whispering, and gossip has run wild since the company has fewer than fifty people. Some say Mario is finally retiring, and others say Mario will probably talk about sales. Stiles, part of the IT team, worries that Mario will fire everyone. You find Elena in the crowd, sitting in the middle of the room as she waves in your direction.

"Oh my God, can you believe Mario has a son he never told us about?!" Elena exclaims as soon as you sit by her side.

"What?"

"I just heard that Mario has a man in his office that looks old enough to be his son. Maybe that is it. Mario will tell us he has a son! He has been hiding all these years!"

You laugh, wondering if your friend has watched too many soap operas. Finally, your boss Mario Auditore enters the room alone, and all conversation shuts down.

"Yes, yes, I know the gossip has already spread around! No, I am not dying, not I am not selling, no, no one is getting fired, Stiles!"

Stiles silently celebrate, and everyone laughs.

"I have some news this morning, sad for some and happy for others. I have to be absent from the CEO position. For a while."

The murmur of "What?" filled the room. Elena mouths, "Sickness?" and you shake your head, worried. Everyone loved Mario: he was a great boss. He had given you a chance at the company despite your lack of experience. You really liked him like so many other employees.

"I have some business I need to solve. Don't worry, everyone, I am not dying. Doctors said I need to slow down for a while, that is all. Put my feet up a bit, and enjoy some vacation time."

You feel Elena's hand around yours, and you squeeze it back. Mario looks out of the room, nodding to someone.

"Well, while I am away, my nephew will stay in my place. He takes care of operations in Italy, so he knows the job. We also decided it was about time you got to know the crew in Italy, Ezio, please come in!"

Ezio?

EZIO?

You squeeze Elena's hand so hard you can hear her groan low with pain as the man who fucked your brains out on Saturday night enters the room. Fuck, he is wearing a fucking blue suit. You can hear your ears ringing as Ezio speaks and your friend whispering your name, worried.

Please, don't notice me, please don't notice me.

Ezio's eyes are glancing around the room. He presents himself looking at the employees' faces when he stops at a very familiar one. He loses his composure for one second, enough for his uncle to notice, but goes back on his rant. When Ezio is done, he looks anywhere but at you. The employees clap, and Mario disperses them. He pulls Ezio close to him, asking what the heck happened as they walk to the CEO's office.

"Niente, zio, niente."

Inside the reunion room, your ears are still ringing. Most people show excitement, admiring how the new boss is sexy and handsome, and start leaving. When you and Elena are alone, she asks you urgently.

"What is going on? You are scaring me."

"It is him," You whisper.

"Who?"

"Ezio. It is him."

Elena takes a second to realize who you are talking about. As she does, you can see her face going from shocked to amused to shocked again.

"The hot Italian God with a huge penis?"

"I hate you! This is all your fault. I'm going to HR. I have always wanted to be a digital nomad anyway."

"Well, if it is my fault you got the best sex in your life, then so be it. Come on, we need to get out of here before Mario, or mhm, he comes wondering why we are still here."

You jump from your seat as if electrified, Elena guides you back to your table. Your table was far from Mario's office, so you were okay. You drop into your chair, Elena still holding your hand.

"Look, breathe. Breathe. Think, he is probably as embarrassed as you are right now—"

"Worse than me? Never!"

"—well, technically, he is the boss. Our new boss, you know? He probably does not want this story to go around as much as you."

You get a sip from your water bottle. Elena was probably right. Ezio would pretend he never saw you. Maybe he would get on on his day, treating you normally since you two just fucked. It was just a casual fuck, a really, really good one that had you both utterly breathless by the end of it, staring at each other's eyes and, for some crazy reason, feeling you made a special connection to each other, but still in the end just a one night stand. No feelings attached, nothing. You were an adult. You could do this.

"You are right. I am an adult, and it was just sex. Just that. An accident that could happen to anyone, right?"

Elena rubs your back, uncertain if she should say no, no, it doesn't, but she doesn't want to crush your spirit more.

"Sure, anyone in the world. Totally possible."

You smile back at her, thanking Elena for her support. You were going to need it.

Niente = Nothing

Zio = Uncle

#ezio x reader #ezio x you #ezio auditore x reader #ezio auditore x you #ezio auditore da firenze x reader #ezio auditore da firenze x you #MY FIRST LONGFIC after idk how many years HAS TO BE SPECIAL #ezio auditore fanfics #ezio auditore fanfic #ezio auditore imagines #ezio auditore imagine

35 notes · View notes

bellysoupset · 6 months

Note

i’ve been acting delulu about the whole wen+vin fight that we all knew was coming up, kinda like completely ignoring it was a thing and all your warnings bc im #notemotionallystrong and i liked pretending it wasn’t gonna happen to cope <3333 BUT AHHHHH after this last fic IM LITERALLY FULL ON SOBBING (IN PUBLIC) WHAT THE FUCKKKK SOUP😭😭😭 you’re so mean (lovingly) 😩 FR IM SO SAD I LOVE MY BABIES SO MUCH THIS IS AWFUL BUT ALSO THE FIGHT WAS SO WELL WRITTEN😭 AND LIKE SO UPSETTING AND UNCOMFY BC OF HOW REAL IT FELT idk how to explain it but it’s like hearing my parents (aka my best friends who’ve been together forever LOL) fight LMAO sobbing 😩😩😩 and also OMG I AUDIBLY GASPED AND HAD TO LOOK AWAY WHEN I READ THE PHONE NOTIFICATIONS THING AND REALISED IT WAS LEO’S TEXT like if there was a terrible way to find out it was THIS 😭😭😭😭😭 BABY GIRL THINKING EVERYONE HAS KNOWN FOR MONTHS???? AND THEN VIN SO DESPERATELY TRYING TO EXPLAIN HIMSELF???? AND JUST TALK??? (a lil too late tho buddy but also I GET IT GOSHHHH) AND THEN BOTH SOBBING GODDDD I CANT I CANT this is so devastating amazing job boo‼️

OMG AND ALSO THE OTHER FICS? i hadn’t commented on them bc i was waiting for this one to react to everything but GODDAMN????? LUKE POOR BUB all feverish spilling everything??? and their reactions🥺🥺🥺🥺 (also side note jon so worried about luke was beautiful and i enjoyed it very much🤭) and OMG leo’s guilt about not noticing the depression symptoms 😩 and the whole thing w bella and kit GOSH I WANT TO PUNCH HIM IN THE FACE HES SUCH AN ASSHOLE‼️

BUT ANYWAYS GOING BACK TO MY BABIES RAAAAAHHHHH I NEED WEN AND VIN TO BE OKAY omfg IM NOT STRONG ENOUGH FOR THIS😭😭 you’re so good at writing angst tho like goddamn i’m still crying and will probably continue to cry about this 😩😭 they need to be okay 🕯️🕯️🕯️🕯️ also i know you said you were nervous about luke and wen’s storyline and im SO CURIOUS and excited to read‼️ im sure whatever you choose to do with them is gonna be amazing and you know we all have a beautiful love/hate relationship w angst so i have a feeling we’re gonna eat it up!! (which we will do regardless bc your writing and storytelling is always wonderful!!!)

sending a snotty sobby virtual hug to all my babies and a strong virtual punch to kit <33333

🦦

ANSWERING THIS SO LATE THAT VIN/WENDY ARE BACK TOGETHER I'M SORRYYYY

I'm actually cackling at you acting delulu because I remember I dropped many MANY hints of the Wendy/Vince break up and you were in my inbox completely ignoring them and me thinking "damn, am i being too subtle???"

Its so funny (and terrible) to be answering this late, because I can totally say the things I was nervous about. So ORIGINALLY Vin/Wendy didnt get back together, they actually broke it off for good and Wendy feeling very isolated from her friend group relapsed in her eating disorder.

But then Wendy kinda girl bossed her way into getting back with Vince, which was not planned, AND opened up to Bella, that was also not planned at all. So I scrapped that storyline! I still want to do something with her E.D, I remember I got an ask ages ago that was something like "Wendy refuses to eat because she's feeling queasy, Vince thinks she relapsed and tries to push her, only to have it come back up and he realizes she's actually sick", so I'll probably write that! A more mild version of what I originally had in mind!

And I'm SORRY i'm a terrible person but I'm sooo proud of myself for making you cry in public. I need a blog badge just for that #angster

Love you 🦦!

#🦦 anon #lovely correspondence

2 notes · View notes

rithmeres · 2 years

Text

hadestown thots (as requested):

first of all here’s a pic of the cast after curtain call sorry its only six pixels wide

also im pretty sure i was standing right next to one of the ensemble members (alex puette, tall guy standing behind orpheus in the picture) on the subway earlier that day

ok what is there to say about patrick page that hasnt already been said. i love it when he enters with ‘i missed ya’ and the people in the audience who aren’t familiar with the show are like wtf [nervous laughter]. the role was literally written for him so it’s no surprise that he just owns it but after seeing him my memory was wiped of the hades i saw on tour i genuinely cannot remember the other guy because patrick page is Thee Guy

eva noblezada STOLE. THE MF. SHOW. seeing her perform live changed me and changed fundamentally how i see the show. when i saw the tour in los angeles it felt like orpheus was the main character. but with eva’s eurydice it’s her world and we are just living in it. her eurydice wants so badly and it comes through brutally despite her insistence that she doesnt need anyone or anything and her fear to have anything lest it slip away. every note was exactly where it needed to be, the quality of her voice and technique is stupendous, even when she’s sobbing on her hands and knees her voice is clarion and pitch perfect. i saw her at the stage door after and SHE said thank you to US and i was like no no no no thank YOU.

jewelle blackman as persephone slayyyyed she’s kinda crazy and i love that for her, though i wish some of the vocals could have been altered to let her go into her super low range like she did when she played one of the fates

sayo oni was orpheus and i loved himmm. famously i am not a fan of reeve carney’s orpheus (sorry) so me n emma were elated to have a fresh voice in the mix. his voice was clear and sure and gorgeous and i had been kind of afraid that even if orpheus was really good he would b overshadowed by eva because she’s such a powerhouse, but they matched & blended well in skill and vocals and i had nothing to worry about. orpheus 2 me only works as a character if he’s naive and childlike and ya boy pulled it off so well.

malcolm armwood was a fantastic understudy hermes (pictured below at the stagedoor with his BEAUTIFUL family and/or friends), although i really REALLY wanted to see lillias white in the role just to see what flavors she would inject to hermes as a woman, mainly in her relationships w persephone and orpheus. but it was fun to have a young hermes bc most of the hermes that i’ve seen/heard have been like 40+ but armwood brought a youthful buoyancy to the role that contrasted with the aged hades+persephone but still seemed older and wiser and ageless next to sayo oni’s childlike orpheus

the fates were much more vindictive and close to villainous in this version. on tour they were a more neutral force

the tour didnt have the elevator in the middle of the turntable, instead there was a door that opened up to the back of the set with red lights that looked like the front of a train. (this was very cool and in some ways i liked it better bc the bway version just had the drum kit there instead). obv the elevator as the route to hell is unmatched when orpheus turns around at the end but my ideal production has both the train lights door AND the elevator for maximum effect so hades et al can exit/enter via the train or the immediate descent underground as the situation requires

#hadestown #in conclusion: on the thai food scale of 1 to 5 chili peppers emma gave it a 6

37 notes · View notes

uglypastels · 2 years

Note

I’m happy that you got to meet your fav, but I think the way you’re talking about his other fans is a bit mean spirited. It seems like you’re desperately trying to prove how much better you are than them. I don’t get why you can’t just be grateful for your experience without dragging others down by constantly mentioning how embarrassing and cringe you think they are. Saying “I love you” to a celebrity is very mild IMO.

I'm not saying im better than anyone I just need some people to know there is a time and place to say shit and I'm sorry but a panel is just not that place. There are hundreds of people sitting there hoping to learn something about their fav (either actor or character) in a limited time. When people go up there and start rambling for ages about themselves NO ONE CARES. you can LITERALLY feel the energy in the room drop. I know because I was there. And i dont say dont tell him what he means to you, do it at the signing table when he can actually properly respond. When you do it so publically it just feels like horrible attention seeking (not to mention the people who go up there, grab the mic, and just ask the actors to give their "too shy" friends or moms a shoutout... who apparently are not too shy to stand up from the crowd and cheer..... or make US sing happy birthday to them???) i'm sorry this is not why we pay so much money to be there. I want to know joe's favorite color or what he does in the morning or what he thinks of eddie's [insert anything]. I. Do. Not. Care. That Becky, 24, from hole-in-a-wall is an aspiring whogivesafuck. Good for you but just ask your question.

Believe me, its not just me. There is a reason why some cons pre-check what people want to ask and its exactly because of this. Time limitations you eat up by your sob stories and generally making people uncomfortable (people were standing there talking about topics that could have been severely triggering to some)

And about the I love you's, yeah its not bad, plenty people say it, but at the same time i feel like they expect something much bigger out of it and, mostly unintentionally, put the people who they say it to on the spot. Lower your expectations, get a reality check, and come up with interesting and original questions (and maybe back ups in case someone is ahead of you) thats all

#uglypastels answers #anon #:)

13 notes · View notes

kikithefox231 · 1 month

Note

writing asks: 4, 5, 8, 12, 17 :D

SORRY THIS TOOK FOREVER MY BAD LOL :') 4. Q: a story idea you haven’t written yet A: BESTIE. YOU KNOW I HAVE A MILLION WIPS. (mild Book of Bill spoilers) Okay BUT one I've been jingling in my head recently is a oneshot about Pacifica dealing with the trauma of her horrible Bill nightmare because it made me insane forever. It is so!!! horrifying!!! and intriguing!!!! I love this idea of her avoiding wearing red gloves and red outfits because it keeps reminding her of the blood staining her hands, thick and warm and raw. And the note about her feeling comforted by the fact that she has Mabel and Dipper's contacts!!! SOBBING!!!! Imagine a scene where she has another nightmare and the only thing that can calm her down is hearing Mabel and Dipper's voice on the other line WAAAAAAAAAAAGH IM INSANE!!!! AND the fact that the twins Understand all of this. They Know how horrible it all is. They're all just kids trying to navigate their way through this trauma. And realizing that it's so much easier to deal with them together. I'm going to combust. Another wip for funsies (and that u don't know abt ;3 ) is one I'll be doing for Honkai Star Rail! I fell in love with the main trio (Stelle, March 7th, and Dan Heng) since the game came out and I've been itching to write a oneshot of them being silly! Mayhaps a bit of hurt/comfort as wellllll???? Anyways I love gay people <3 5. Q: first sentence of the fifth paragraph of an unpublished WIP A: OHOHOHOHOHO time to pull out the archives!!!! "As they opened the front doors, Miko was suddenly struck by how tired she felt. She didn’t get tired often, especially when her job was fueled by adrenaline every day and every hour. But right now she’d love a nap. Or a coma. Maybe even a nap and then a coma. Sounds festive." This is from the 4th paragraph BUT ITS FINE BC ITS FUNNY From my Miko Forget-Me-Not au which is IN THE WORKS!!! WILL BE PUBLISHED!!!! EVENTUALLY!!!! ONE DAY!!!!! Also LOVE writing Miko so much,,,, she's JUST like me fr

8. Q: if you had to write a sequel to a fic, you’d write one for… A: OOOOOOOOO great question! I've had a lot of ideas for sequels over the years and some that are wips but I think the one I'm most dead set on is doing a threequel to my Coming Home. series! I've been meaning to do it for ages and I just haven't had the motivation to but one day!! I really want to complete it with a short chapter from Domino 2 and 3's unique povs about Anne near the end of the show I just,,,, need,,,,, to drag myself to start the fic,,,,,,,,,

12. Q: a trope you’re really into right now A: Oh man SO MANY but I think right now,,,,, big emotional outbursts? I'm always a big fan of characters who just stuff so much of their emotions into a jar and eventually letting it all out in a huge impactful moment (NOT PROJECTING AT ALL HAHAHA) and changes their relationship with the people around them forever because of that. MWAH!!! CHEF'S KISS!!! I just adore big emotional moments in general (its literally 90% of what I write lmao) and maybe a big part of that is bc I have ADHD and feel many things in very extreme ways and seeing characters feel the same way I do is comforting haha

17. Q: talk about your writing and editing process A: Oh boy it sure is a Process Okay so generally I get the idea kicked into my face after listening to a certain song, watching a certain scene, or looking at fanart. It's rare that I don't have ideas for fanfics bc I just have them jumbling around in my head all the time. I usually record down any major ideas I have in my google docs or notes app, (sometimes write down a specific line or scene that is super vivid in my mind) and then when I'm hyperfixating on a certain show/character/idea I can always go back to it and add to it! I also browse through my ideas and wips whenever I feel like making something creative but don't know what project specifically. I also listen to lots of music when developing an idea since it helps for inspiration!!! When the stars align and I have the right motivation and energy for a project I usually will latch onto it until it's finished or until I get a considerate amount of it done. I'm usually Crazy Glued to the project for HOURS and it's almost impossible for me to stop lol After that, I usually take a break from the project (sometimes a few hours, sometimes a whole day) and come back to it later to reread it and see what I want to change or add. My editing process is not usually very intensive or long since I get tired of it quickly but sometimes what I'll do is revise it once then come back to it a few weeks or months later with a clear mind and see what I want to change. And the good thing is that by then my writing skills will have improved so the later passes look much better. Also I usually send them to you so that I can tell they're coherent and I'm not going crazy LOL My editing process can also be much shorter and sometimes if I'm really happy with what I wrote or want to post it immediately, I'll just revise it once or twice right after I finish the fic. That's how it turned out with And I try my best, to prove that nothing's out to get you. which was nice!!! Especially since it was more of a quick writing practice. I also find that sometimes I just need to let the text be and not overedit it where it looses the original impact and tone I was going for.

PHEWWW YAY THANK U FOR ASKING AGAIN!!!! this was fun :D

#thanks for asking!#kiki stuff #my stuff #bee bestie <3

0 notes

maiverie · 1 year

Note

MAI BESTIE SINCE UR BACK I SEND U ASKS CUZ IM BORED

BRO I HAVENT UPDATED MY WORKS IN LIKE.. FOREVER 😹 I DONT KNOW IF I EVER WILL BYE BUT IM IN LIKE SENIOR YEAR NOW AND ITS KICKING ASS CUZ LIKE WAHT THE FAWK IS THIS SHIT WHY DID I GROW UP THIS QUICK TAKE 👏 ME👏 BACK

AND OMG I JUST SAW THAT YOULL BE UPDATING TRIAGE LIKE STWAP I AM WAITING ❗️❗️❗️ NO JOKE I CHECKED YOUR ACC ALMSOG LIKE EVERYDAY (stalker who?) to see IF TRIAGE HAD AN UPDATE CAUSE LIKE SUNSHINE HEE 🥹🫶

ANYWYAYS NONE OF MY IRL FRIENDS ARE ONLINE SO THIS WAS MY DUMP MY EXTROVERTED SELF NEEDS AN OUTLET AND I HAVENT SEEN A LIVING SOUL EXCEPT MY PARENGS AND WELL MY CRUSTY ASS DOG IN TWO MONTHS

ZA ‼️ RA ‼️ LOML!!!!! girl I have not heard or seen from u in literally ages ITS BEEN CRAZY I MISSED UUU 😭😭 HOW HAVE U BEEN TELL ME EVERYTHINGG???

smh GET BACK ON TUMBLR AND START UPDATING ALL UR WORKS RN BEFORE I BEAT UR ASS ⁉️🚨 BUT I GET IT LIKE SENIOR YEAR MUST BE INSANEE 😭 growing up is the worst thing I've ever done i already want to kill myself so enjoy it while u can 😍

HASDHFSDH WTF NO WAY?? STOP IM SOBBING 😭 girl im so sorry I really did disappear :( :( :( iM BACK NOW !!! BUT YES TRIAGE UPDATE IS COMING!! I've set a 24 hour countdown so it'll be up SOOOON SOON. don't expect much though bc im so rusty 💔

NAWT UR CRUSTY DOG LEAVE HIM ALONE !!! ??!?!?!?!

#ask #@ : sunootonin ♡︎

1 note · View note

lotus-flowerz · 2 years

Text

lingering words

Diluc comforts a depressed reader after they overhear something they shouldn't have

Diluc x gn!reader

TW!! FEELINGS OF ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION, SELF DEPRICATING THOUGHTS

a/n- you guessed it! based off true events

i hate my writing in this im so tired omfg unedited bc its 1:30 and i want sleep

its 9 am now i just reread it and i literally hate it so much i had a certain idea in my head but for the life of me could not make it work in writing this post is not what i wanted at all 😭😭

"For real, they're just always so... down. Gloomy, I guess."

"Quick to irritation, as well! I don't know, they're just not the way they used to be."

"Quieter too. They seem so angry all the time. I can't say they're very enjoyable to be around anymore."

You listened to three of your "friends" agree on how you acted. You felt sick to your stomach. They had you completely mischaracterized.

Am I mean?

Angry?

Gloomy?

You'd been through some rough shit in your life. It had left you depressed, anxious, weary, and tired. You'd been like this for years now though. You sighed, feeling like someone had just kicked you. You began the trudge back to the Dawn Winery, trying not to let tears cloud your vision. For once, you hoped Diluc was working late at the tavern so he didn't have to see you like this.

Maybe he thinks of me the same way they do?

The thought made your blood run cold. You picked up the pace in your walking, just wanting to go home.

You practically ran through the door and slammed it behind you, rushing to you and Diluc's bedroom to try and calm down.

You closed the door behind you and leaned your back on it, sliding onto the floor.

You don't know how long you sat there, staring at the floor, trying to run through every possible solution in your head to fix this.

How can I make myself not seem so angry or gloomy?

You felt something shove against your back, making you gasp.

"What the- Y/n, what are you doing on the floor?"

"Nothing. I'm sorry."

You got up and moved to the bed, grabbing a book off your bedside table and pretending to read it.

"Nope. Not going to work. What is it, Y/n? What happened?"

He spoke softly, concern seeping into his normally monotone voice.

"I heard something I shouldn't have. And I fear it's true."

He sat on the bed beside you as you shakily recounted what had been said about you.

"Y/n, they don't know you well enough to make such... childish claims against you."

"I didn't mean to make them think I was angry. What if other people think the same thing?"

"Because you're quiet? I doubt it, love."

"N-no, apparently I seem gloomy."

"And you have every right to be gloomy."

"Huh?"

You looked up at him, unsure of what he meant. You lived a lavish life and had a wonderful boyfriend. What right to be gloomy is he talking about?

"People have said the same things about me. I'm rude, gloomy, no fun, in my own world. Maybe in some sense, they're right."

"Diluc, no, after what happened to you.. you don't have to be cheerful all the time."

"You explained my point, love. People like to talk, but they have no idea what things have torn you apart in the past. You're still picking up the pieces from your past. You don't need to recover instantly just because your circumstances have improved."

He paused for a moment, blinking back tears of his own. He took a deep breath and smiled at you, taking one of your hands in both of his.

"You also don't need to recover because lots of time has passed. If there's one thing I've learned best is that recovery is a cruel and winding road that can go on for ages. All you need to do right now is breathe. You don't owe anyone recovery, and you don't owe then an explanation, either."

The stray tears on your cheeks had turned into quiet sobs as Diluc pulled you into him, hugging you close.

"You don't always have to be strong, darling. Don't rush recovery for the sake of others, and certainly don't let those harsh words effect the way you act."

"Only if you promise to do the same thing." you said in a small voice.

He nodded, kissing the top of your head.

"Of course. As long as we have each other, the lingering words of bitter people won't get in our way."

#diluc #genshin comfort #genshin fluff #genshin x reader #diluc ragnvindr #diluc fluff #diluc comfort #diluc x reader

346 notes · View notes

jamesbuchananxsteviegrant · 3 years

Text

I Pick the TV Show, Rogers Shuts His Cake-Hole | Bucky x Steve x Reader (Angst, Fluff)

Category: Angst, Fluff (Suggested) Age: 14+ Trigger Warnings: none, other than the standard explicit language Ship: Bucky x Steve x Reader Summary: Steve Snaps At Reader When He’s Stressed, Resulting In Her Being Very Upset Request: "can u write where steve/bucky is overwhelmed with something and when reader asks to help or is telling them to relax they snap at reader and reader is hurt which makes them feel really bad afterwards. thank you sm. i love ur writings. and this is anon right? is it alright if u dont post my response if its not anon? im sorry. thank you so much. ur blog always pictures great stucky imagines. 💗💗💗" Contains Spoilers for: N/A Word Count: 2,488

---

A given, the super-soldier had been on nonstop missions for the last month or so, but she thought she was helping him feel better, not making him feel worse.

“Would you like anything to eat, Stevie? You’ve barely moved all day.” (Y/N)’s voice is small. Quiet.

She’s leaning through the door of his study where he’s sat putting together his mission reports from the last three or four missions he’s been out on.

He shakes his head but doesn’t even turn to look at her.

Sighing, the woman walks further into the room where her boyfriend is slouched over the desk.

“You gotta take a break, Stevie.” She whispers, resting her hands on his shoulders.

She notices the way they tense up, but he still remains silent.

His fingers continue to write up his report on the laptop.

“I’m worried about you, Stevie; talk to me.”

“I’m busy, (Y/N).”

“I know you are, baby, but you’ve gotta look after yourself too.” She attempts, leaning down to press a kiss to his cheek. He pulls away.

The woman furrows her brows.

“Steve, please, you’ve got to-”

“(Y/N), just stop!”

The shout is sudden and it makes her flinch back away from the man as he turns to face her.

“I’m fine, alright?! I don’t need you babying me all the time!”

She doesn’t respond for a second, surprised at her lover’s outburst.

He says nothing more, simply turns back to the laptop and continues typing away.

“Steve, look how stressed you are. Can you please just-”

“STOP! Okay?! Just stop! Leave me the fuck alone while I finish these neverending mission reports. For once in your life can you just understand that not everything is about you?!”

(Y/N) swears that being shot in the heart wouldn’t hurt half as much as the words that just came out of the man’s mouth.

Her mouth opens and closes as if searching for the right words to say, but that hurt.

Is she really that bad? Is that the truth behind all of this? That she’s clingy? Thinks everything is about her? That was never her intention. (Y/N) is well aware of how important being an Avenger is. Hell, she is an Avenger, for Christ’s sakes.

She says nothing more and leaves the room.

She can’t even decide if she feels sad. No. She’s not sad, she’s not angry, she’s not… anything.

Numb.

Naturally, her feet lead her to their room. Steve’s room. They all basically share the super soldier’s abode since they all got together, but right now she doesn’t dare open the door.

Doing a full one-eighty spin, (Y/N) takes herself back to a place she barely touches anymore. Her room.

It’s pretty empty. Most of her clothes are in Steve’s room, in her own walk-in wardrobe. Her bed is perfectly made from the last time she slept in here - maybe a year ago?

The woman walks around her bed and straight onto her bedroom balcony, overlooking the lake at the back of the compound, and stays there. For three-hours. Until Bucky comes looking for her.

He came home from his mission about thirty-minutes ago only to find their shared room of Steve’s empty. He searched just about everywhere, completely clueless.

“FRIDAY, where’s (Y/N) and Steve?” He finally gives in.

“Captain Rogers is in study five, and Agent (L/N) is in her private quarters.”

Now that makes the brunet furrow his brows.

Why would (Y/N) be in her room and not his or Steve’s?

He prioritises finding (Y/N) first, knowing Steve will be writing up mission reports, no doubt.

Despite them being together for over six-years now, he hesitates when reaching for the handle of her bedroom door. Instead, the man opts to knock.

No answer.

“(Y/N)?” Nothing. “Doll, it’s me; can I come in?” Nothing.

Bucky tries the door handle and finds it unlocked, yet still hesitates.

“Baby?” He calls out. Again, nothing.

He’s cautious now. Scared.

Her room looks as untouched as the last time he saw it, which was a few months back when she was after one of her plushies.

“(Y/N)?”

It’s when he feels the chill of the midnight winds ruffle his hair that he realises her balcony doors aren’t fully closed.

Striding straight over, his eyes widen at the sight of his girlfriend curled up in the corner of the outdoor area, crying.

“(Y/N), baby, hey, what’s wrong?!”

Bucky immediately drops to his knees in front of the woman, reaching for her hands and gently tugging them away from her tear-stained face.

“(Y/N), doll, look at me.” His voice is gentle. Soothing.

She does almost instantly but her sadness stays.

“What happened, baby? Are you hurt?”

The fear and sincerity in his voice is enough to prompt the woman to shake her head. Yes, she’s hurting emotionally, but he needs confirmation that she’s not dying.

The woman immediately sees the relief take over his features, but he’s still concerned.

“What’s wrong, doll?”

Her eyes stray away from his, not wanting to tell him what’s got her so upset.

“Hey, no, look at me, baby,” He whispers, hand lightly grasping at her chin to raise her face back up to his. “What’s got you so worked up, (Y/N)?”

Another shake of her head as she tries to escape her lover’s hold.

“Baby, please, you’re scaring me.”

Her face contorts into something close to heartbreak as she wants nothing more than to reassure the man in front of her.

“It’s okay, Buck.”

“It’s not okay! Doll, I haven’t seen you cry since Stevie nearly died on that mission in Ohio like two-years-ago! Talk to me.”

She takes a deep breath and wipes her face of the shedding tears.

“Do you want me to get Stevie?”

The question is innocent and makes sense, but her eyes widen and she shakes her head desperately.

“No! No, please, no.”

That truly makes the super soldier concerned.

“Doll, please can you tell me what’s happened?”

Never in the last eight-years that Bucky and (Y/N) have known each other has she been so reluctant to see Steve.

Another sob escapes her and it’s breaking his heart.

“Baby, please.”

“Steve got mad at me, alright?!” She manages an attempted shout. “I just wanted him to look after himself.”

“What happened? What did Steve do?”

He’s concerned. Massively.

“I was trying to get him to eat; he hasn’t eaten properly in so long. He’s so overworked and he’s hung up on all these mission reports. He told me that not everything was about me - shouted at me; told me to stop.” She’s whimpering and sniffling again now. “Please get him to eat something, James.”

That last sentence is the one that crushes him. She’s upset, yeah, but above all that, she’s still worried about the blond super soldier.

“Come on, baby, let’s go to our room and get into bed, yeah? I’ll go and speak to Stevie.”

Her eyes meet his and she looks scared, but the ocean blue gaze that he returns makes her bound to his every command.

The woman nods.

“Okay.”

“That’s my girl.”

With the help of the Winter Soldier, (Y/N) manages to stand up, letting him lead her out of her private room and into their shared one of Steve’s.

“Here, let’s get you into your PJs, yeah?”

He doesn’t leave room for negotiation as he helps his girlfriend strip out of her casual dress and into one of his oversized t-shirts.

“You get snuggled up in bed, doll. I’m going to go and get Stevie, okay?”

He hates how she looks nervous at the mention of their other lover’s name.

“He loves you more than words can describe, baby girl, I promise you. He shouldn’t have lashed out at you, I’m gonna talk to him, okay?”

A hesitant nod and forced smile is enough for now.

“I’ll be back shortly, I promise.” He leans over and gives the woman a kiss on the lips, leaving her with one of her favourite shows playing on the TV.

“Bucky,” Her choked up voice calls out just before he leaves.

The man turns from his place in the doorway.

“I love you.”

The smile that takes over his expression is contagious.

“I love you too, baby girl. More than anything.”

Despite his reassurance to the woman, he’s pretty damn pissed for a number of reasons about Steve losing his cool with their girl. Reason number one being, how dare he? Reason number two being, he knows better than to overwork, yet here we are.

Bucky doesn’t even knock once he approaches the glass doors of the study where Steve is sat typing away on the laptop.

The blond doesn’t even glance up to see who entered. He barely heard the door open which enrages Bucky further.

The brunet slams the lid of the laptop shut without saying a word, prompting Steve’s head to shoot up, glaring daggers at whoever has interrupted him.

“What the fuck, James?!”

That makes Bucky really get annoyed.

“Are you serious right now, Rogers?”

“I’m in the middle of about seven different mission reports, Buck, I’ve gotta finish them.” The man sighs, going to open the lid of the PC once more, only for Bucky to hold it down. “James, seriously,”

“No. What you need to do is explain to me why our girlfriend has been crying for the last God-knows how many hours?”

That makes Steve snap back to reality.

“What? (Y/N) has been crying? Is she okay?”

Bucky literally rolls his eyes at that.

“Are you fucking serious, Steve?” He repeats, Steve looking confused, expression contorting as he realises that his boyfriend is seriously angry at him.

“Bucky, what’s wrong? What’s happened?”

The Winter Soldier’s head lolls back as he groans in frustration.

“You seriously have no idea?” He asks, rhetorically, watching Steve look almost scared. “Do you often shout at your girlfriend and forget it happened?”

Cap’s eyes widen at that, and he visibly gulps.

“What?”

“She came in here to make sure you were looking after yourself, which you weren’t, by the way, and you tell her that not everything is about her?! Are you fucking stupid, Steve?!”

He remembers it all too well in that moment, turning his head down to avoid the frustrated glare of his male lover.

“No. No, you don’t get to look away from me. Look at me.” Bucky demands, watching the blond super soldier reluctantly do so. “I come home from my own exhausting mission, search for (Y/N) for thirty-minutes, and find her crying her God-damn heart out on the balcony of HER room; not our room, Steve, no. Her room.”

Steve’s heart shatters and his eyes widen once more.

(Y/N) hates staying in her room. She’d always be in his or Bucky’s without a doubt.

“I- Buck-”

Bucky shakes his head and stands back upright as Steve is lost for words.

“I’m not mad at you, Steve. I get it, you know? You’ve been overworking for the last month, I know you’re stressed, but fuck, baby, you can’t hurt her like that. Do you know how much my heart fucking shattered when I saw her curled up in the corner of her own God-damn balcony?! It tore me apart. She hasn’t cried since you nearly fuckin-” Bucky chokes on his own word as he walks away from his lover.

“I’m sorry! Buck, I’m sorry, okay? I shouldn’t have let Fury send me on that many missions, I- I should’ve said no. I’m sorry.” Steve attempts, standing up and following the brunet, turning him around to face him once more.

“It’s not me you need to be apologising to, Stevie.”

Captain America nods and leans up to press a kiss to the man’s lips.

“I’m sorry, James.”

Bucky takes a deep breath and forces a smile.

“I forgive you. Of course I forgive you, I know you didn’t mean it, but I swear to God, if you hurt her again…”

Steve is already shaking his head.

“I wouldn’t dream of either of you getting hurt. Where is she?”

“Our room.”

He nods and begins heading toward the woman to which he owes more than he can give.

The door is half ajar when Steve gets there, he slowly opens it to reveal his girlfriend in all her glory, curled up under their Captain America themed duvet - which Sam bought the trio as a joke last Christmas. Her face is clear-as-day red from her earlier upset, and it breaks his heart.

The man knocks gently on the day as if not to startle the poor girl.

“Hey, sweetheart.” He offers a solemn smile when she turns to see who’s there.

He hates the way he can see her hesitation to speak to him as opposed to her usual squeal of his name, arms opening wide to welcome him into her cuddle-fest.

“Hi.” She manages, forcing her own smile.

There’s silence floating between them, the only sound being Jensen Ackles, in his role of Dean Winchester, talking a load of nonsense about pie on the TV that’s streaming Supernatural.

“Baby, I’m so sorry.” Steve manages, taking a step toward the bed. “Nothing can excuse the way I yelled at you, and I’m so sorry for that, but, sweetheart, trust me when I say I didn’t mean it. I was so stupidly stressed, and I should never have let it get to that point.”

She nods, truly believing his words, but it still hurt.

The blond sits down on the edge of the bed, not daring to cuddle his girlfriend until she’s comfortable.

“I love you so much, (Y/N) (L/N).”

A bigger smile taints her lips at that.

“I love you too, Steven.” Her voice is barely a whisper but he hears it clear as day.

“Can I hold you?”

(Y/N) smiles and shakes her head as if he was being silly.

“You never need to ask permission for that, Stevie. No matter what.”

With another sad smile, he pulls the woman into his arms and holds her tighter than ever before.

“I’m so sorry, my love.”

“I forgive you, but no more missions for a while.” She whispers.

“Yes, boss.”

Bucky’s leaning against the doorframe, watching the interaction. He took a detour to Tony’s office and made sure to give the billionaire a piece of his mind about making sure Fury didn’t have Steve on any missions for a long time.

“Is this the last episode?” The brunet speaks up, stripping himself of his clothes as he enters their room properly.

“Yeah.” (Y/N) nods.

“I still think we should watch Vampire Diaries instead.” Steve chuckles, mirroring Bucky’s actions.

“I pick the TV show, Rogers shuts his cake-hole.” (Y/N) teases, mocking a line from Supernatural and snuggling herself in the middle of the bed, sandwiched between the two super soldiers - where she belongs. “I love you both.”

“Love you too, sweetheart.”

“Love you always, doll.”