#its called Ive read this book i love this book i need this book

[aroace-cat-lady]

Well. Guess who's gonna reread TID cuz they looked for a quote and got back in the game

[themyscirah]

Ok game time which 3 series would you just DIE to get a run on ? I'm talking full creative control, can be as a writer or an artist + plotter if that suits your vibe best

My 3 are

Suicide Squad

Wonder Woman

Green Lantern Corps/Green Lanterns

(in that order)

[frobby]

i love madoka magica however i dont think we as a fandom talk enough about how tragic madoka herself is. probably because the narrative itself steers you away from thinking about her personally. shes not a character shes a desire that homura has, shes a force of good, shes homura's foil. but those are all madoka's narrative roles but madoka herself as a person is not really looked at because we are viewing this world from an unreliable narrator(homura) who only sees madoka as those things. The best thing homura could have done for madoka was give up on her, to let her go. because every time we go back in time the image of madoka is distorted, she loses more of herself every regression of homura's as she tries harder and harder to save her. We don't even know what madoka originally wished for to become a magical girl in the original timeline. and she actually acts quite differently than the madoka we meet. shes a lot more honest and caring and bold. by the time homura's has reached the actual anime madoka has been reduced by the sands of time to a figment of herself. she has no wants or desires of her own beyond wanting to do good and help her friends and when all her humanity is stripped away is when she finally acends to godhood because thats all thats left of her. an ideal and a faith in her. madoka kaname died a long time ago and all that is left is her ghost.

[vhvrs]

op of that "read a book" post is a terf so deleting but reposting my lil rambles abt the panic in needle park novel

[dbphantom]

maybe i should have gone into practical effects instead of computer science...

[trutletruffle]

dude i love shirley jackson she never fucking misses like...asdjfabksdna it’s literally my favorite vibe of horror she has ruined me for steven king. i just love the way she builds up a perfect fantasy world and slowly shows all of the cracks as they get bigger and bigger before revealing that none of it was ever real to begin with. i love it ok.

[oflgtfol]

the whole tigerclaw/star vs tigerheart/star dichotomy could be interesting if only for the fact that they already treaded the whole “oh nooo im descended from this tyrannical fascist and i look exactly like him to where nobody can even look at me without remembering my ancestor’s crimes, i bear the burden of his legacy and its on me to do better” thing with brambleclaw/star. like even the whole “redeeming the name tigerstar had” thing started with brambleclaw getting the -claw suffix to redeem it from tigerclaw. its just boring like its already happened whats the point

[bmpmp3]

i NEEED to be more annoying about being mixed race in public i keep forgetting how dire it is. sometimes i point out stuff in like visual culture classes about like a magazine cover with a biracial model or something and it blows peoples MINDS because the whole class forgot mixed people were real

[nomaishuttle]

ive been in my fantasy world where i have a child all day its whatever

[ifyoucandaniel]

I want to thank you for making your list of recommended long batfam fics. I have been making my way through it and I am really enjoying them! ESPECIALLY cards on the table (I also love Dark Matter but I had already read it). Please let us know if you ever get more long batfam fic recs 🥺

okay so ive been waiting to answer this until i had gathered a good chunk of new long fics and ive been getting a lot of similar messages asking for recommendations, so here is another list of my fav long batman fics!

Jason and the Three Terrors by @cdelphiki, 220k, ongoing, T. if i can get you to read one thing, let it be this. ohhh my god where to even begin, this is a fic where jason stays with the league after his dip in the lazarus pit for a little while and winds up being charged with getting damian, his cousin, and his sister out of the league safely. this fic is just so fucking good, cdelphiki always writes such seamless relationship growth and watching jason go from "im dropping these brats off first chance i get" to "im a single mother of three and i need to provide for my kids" is phenomenal. 1000/10, the writing, the kids, the relationships, please do yourself a favor and read this.

A Collision of Masks by Movaz, 169k, completed, T. !! guys. this is such a good dick grayson-centric fic. this is set in an AU where batman never joined the justice league so the justice league knows very little about batman inc. and consequently dick never joins YJ so the YJ team is tasked with checking out a new hero called nightwing in bludhaven and police officer grayson is tasked with helping the team in their investigation :) really good fic exploring dick juggling all his identities and finally gaining people he can rely on! i actually did a bind of it so you know i love this story so much

Life Happens by @cdelphiki, 176k, complete, G. ok so this fic is probably one of the most beautiful stories of growth and love i've read. its about tim and damian being transported from their world into ours where they're only comic book characters and they start to build a life for themselves here. cdelphiki is one of the most amazing authors, im currently going through all of their works, but this one has just stayed with me and i dont think anyone should pass it up. watching tim and damian grow together and seeing damian have a real childhood and just the whole concept of life happening wether you want it to or not is so beautifully done. cannot recommend enough.

Honoring Promises by LananiA3O, completed, 14k, T. okay this isnt actually a long fic, but its one of my favorite fics ever and i need it on this list. if you're like me and you love UTRH aus where instead of sticking around as red hood after bruce threw a batarang at his throat jason fucks off and disappears to live a normal life, this is for you. from dick's pov, he realizes jasons last letter was a last attempt at reaching out and stalks him until he finds out what really happened to his little brother. i think about this every day and wish it was 10000 words long

The Time Before by @cdelphiki, 80k, completed, G. at this point this is basically just a cdelphiki fic rec lmao when i said everything by them was good, i meant that shit. this is a fic where jason is sent back into time when he was 9 years old but still has all his memories from the future. he goes to bruce for help despite wanting to do literally anything else and is surprised to realize maybe everything isn't how he remembers it 10 years in the future and maybe theres a chance he can go home when hes older again. once again cdelphiki hitting me in the feels with this one, really amazing study on how time and pain can change how you perceive and remember things and also just forgiveness and fixing mistakes and accepting mistakes were made. very good, highly recommend

Good Fences Make Good Neighbors by Sophene, 80k, completed, batlantern, T. I have no excuse for this, this is such a fun and funny fic i love it so much. basically HOA president single dad bruce with his 10 million adopted kids and then hal jordan moves in next door and plays his music too loud at 10pm on a school night and throws parties and bruce has a stick up his ass about it. i really really love the shift in hal when kyle comes to live with him as his ward (? i cant actually remember if hes adopted or just a ward) and seeing him finally understand why bruce acts the way he does when it comes to his kids. also seeing bruce just being a tired dad 90% of the fic when he isnt glaring at hal is so good.

Option C by CasualGeek, 78k, completed, T. this has, in my opinion, a very unique and interesting premise. basically, what if instead of becoming red hood, jason comes back to gotham and manages to get Joker put on trial for the murder of sheila haywood and get the insanity plea thrown out. really interesting approach to batman and joker and jason technically doing things through the legal justice system and what that means for him and the people around him. very good, read it all in one sitting

butcherbird, fly away home by e_va, 41k, completed, M. lost days jason todd loml! basically what if when jason was off on his world tour one of his tutors kidnapped bruce wayne and jason has feelings about it against his will. "what if lost days jason was stuck in the same room as a sick bruce for more than 10 minutes and actually had to talk to him without punching him" AU and i throughly enjoyed it. @darlingatlas recommended this one and she never misses with the jason recs

this kind of weather by r_astra, 55k, completed, T. this is the fic something in the static was originally inspired by and if you know me, i love that series, and i love this fic too. another what if jasons mom didnt die until later and social services gets involved before he can bolt and bruce seeks him out with some very interesting news. i love fics that display jason’s relationship with crime alley and him being one of them. very good, i love jason so much

ok now these aren't actually long fics but i need to get them out here because i love them so much and highly recommend!

To My Brother by a_silly_gander, 7k, completed, T. Lost days jason au where he starts sending post cards from his travels to dick on a whim while we follow his time away and the people he meets. i love this one so much, please read it if you love jason and dick, its so special to me.

Enhanced Fashion Sense is a Perk of Being a Cat by 12pt_timesnewromanfont, 23k, complete, G. selina breaks into drake manor to steal a cat artifact and accidentally meets the drakes ten year old son they left home alone. then she starts keeping tabs on him and eventually adopts him and makes him stray. i really love selina finding tim before bruce and taking care of him <3 10/10 i wish selina would adopt me

[nightmarist]

Some Zevlor Things —

EDIT 12/2/23: Added a few more things

A fellow Tiefling Hellrider, Tilses, is with him in the caves acting as his bodyguard. He sometimes calls her Tilly.

There is one bedroll in the caves shoved off in the far corner with a book titled "The Devil You Know: An Autobiography" - not sure if it's his personal writing or if he's reading it, either way it adds to the flavor of his of his tiefling pride (and/or anguish).

It reads:

Have you ever had a god change your blood? It is a horrifying thing, even for those who may desire it. Yet few tieflings wished for Asmodeus to claim their bodies, only be given no choice in the matter. It is not as if we were well-loved before the archdevil's gambit. Our people have always struggled against the notion of 'devilkin', as if a single drop of infernal ichor inescapably corrupts. How amusing, when so many others willingly sell their souls to fiends, yet their culture as a whole escapes the blame. By what method can we redeem ourselves, when the crime is not ours? I would drive a blade into every warlock that aided Asmodeus' damned ritual, but personal vengeance cannot undo the will of a god, much less one as slippery as the Lord of Lies. When every passerby thinks you a thief and heretic, it is deeply tempting to become one. (cut off) The only thing that has stopped me is knowing Asmodeus wants nothing more than for all of us to fall from grace.

Around the his table are Invasion Plans for Elturgard, Traveler's Guide to Baldur's Gate, Traveler's Guide to the Sword Coast Vol IV: The Risen Road (which aligns when he tells you earlier there are gnolls on the road), and "Front and Center: a Thespian's Memoir" that reads:

"... in fact, the greatest joy of my life hasn't been acting, but becoming. When you choose a character to play, you don't just wear a mask - you take a little bit of their soul for your own. Whoever you are in your heart of hearts, if only by the faintest note."

Zevlor aside I think this is a sweet quote for the player and player character relationship <3

Dialogue in the Caves:

Zevlor: I Hardly need a bodyguard, Tilses. This isn't Avernus. Tilses: No sir. At least the monsters there looked like monsters.

—

Tilses: Commander— Zevlor: Just Zevlor, Tilly. We're civilians now, remember? Tilses: With respect, sir — being a Hellrider is for life. They can't take — Zevlor: They can, and did. Avernus changed things — best we get used to that. Tilses: ... Yes, Zevlor

—

Tilses: The Watch or the Flaming Fist? Zevlor: Pardon? Tilses: When we get to Baldur's Gate. Where are we enlisting? Zevlor: I'm done soldiering, Tilly. I'd like a clean start. But go with the Watch. You're too honest to be a mercenary.

—

Zevlor: No word from the scouts, yet? Tilses: No sir. But if there's a clear path past the goblins, they'll find it. Zevlor: Yes, of course.

ITEMS —

in the Chest there is a bronze goblet, 46 gold, and a battle-worn blade. On his person he has his gloves (Hellrider's Pride), an apple, a camp supply pack, and the key to his chest.

The blade says:

A fine by well-used sword. It seemed to have once belonged to a holy order, but the indication of rank and patron deity at the hilt have recently been filed down.

The gloves' flavor text says:

A waft of sulphur emanates from this proudly-kept piece.

Celebration at the Camp:

"I should be out there, talking with them. In... Just a moment, maybe." "Is this everyone? Our numbers have grown so few..." "No more. I can't afford to lose any more of them." "No. Let them have fun. I'll be ruining it come morning anyway."

Mindfayer Colony:

Things he mumbles in the Pod:

The pod will show you his memories of Elturel:

After saving Zevlor, I forced myself to pick the "mean" options just to see how it goes.

If you tell him its his fault tieflings were imprisoned in moonrise, he says:

If you tell him "Do yo have a right to ask?" when he asks about the tieflings:

He doesn't argue with any of your remarks except one, when he says "For a moment I welcomed it" and you tell him "For a moment until you realized your reward would be a tadpole" he corrects you:

If you tell him if he wanted power he should live up to his own ideal:

If you tell him to get out of your sight:

When you tell him it's not his fault he was enthralled:

If you tell him "Fine. Good luck, Zevlor."

If you say you could use another blade in the fight to come:

At the Netherbrain:

(smiling <3)

"The journey has been brutal, but I stand here a Hellrider once more, and I would die a proud man if I died this day."

I know it's a Soldier thing to be proud to die for a cause but it still makes me worry for him given his background so far <:]

If you click on him, he has two unvoiced lines:

if you pickpocket him at this point, he'll have the same items on him as before (in this save he has a carrot instead of an apple for me).

His stats at this time: (Steeped in Bliss is from one of my items)

Post Game (Patch 5)

I don't know if there are other permutations of this letter, yet, but this is what I received:

I hope my penmanship has improved somewhat in the past months. When I first stumbled into this city, I shook so badly that I could scarcely hold the soup the priests pressed into my hands - let alone write and thank you as you deserve. It is only when the city itself began to shake that I felt my hands grow still. Along with the other veterans sheltering at the temple - discards of Elturel's 'unworthy' legions - I watched that monstrosity rise over the city. We felt no fear. Only anger. Disgust. Purpose - and with it, power. I do not know what oath we cling to now, or how long it will last - but we shall use it to ensure that this city will not suffer as Elturel did. Whether it wants us or not. It is more than thanks alone I owe. No words can make amends for what I did to my people, but that is as it should be. More come to the temple every day to aid in the relief efforts, and if I am permitted to work alongside them, then I am content. Come and see us, when you can. Zevlor

It's interesting — if not bitterswet, tragic, and inspiring — to hear that Zevlor and other Paladins regained their Oaths via pure, stubborn devotion to saving people when it began to look as bad as Elturel.

[choccy-milky]

hey! They already asked you but I don't know if you forgot hehe, what are the mbti of Clora and Sebastian? 😸

OK, I FINALLY HAVE AN ANSWER!! took me a hot minute to figure out sebs, but after reading all the pages and comparing, i do think entp fits him the best. also i saw this picture on pinterest about a relationship between isfj and entp and its so true, esp the "do not listen to each other's advice, still get each other out of trouble" LMFAO. also the 'protecting isfj at all costs' 🥺🥺🥺im soft. (ALSO DONT COME AT ME I KNOW I SPELLED KNOWLEDGEABLE WRONG IM TOO LAZY TO FIX IT😭) OKAY!! and its been a while so i'll be using this ask to reply to a buncha others🙏🙏

my fanfic does follow the plot of the game, but with sebastian added to every sidequest/story mission. and then from around the third (niamh's) trial, it starts to branch more into (mostly all) original stuff!^^

yes actually LMAO, clora's lawley-slap wasn't even planned. but as i was writing it i started to get so offended on her behalf i was like GIRL, SLAP THIS BITCH🤬 so she did😇😇 id say its normal, yeah! even tho i stick to my outlines, a lot of what happens just kinda happens without my prior planning as i begin to write bahaha, especially dialogue scenes.

aw, im glad u like my blog so much and that it can help u even in the smallest of ways 😭thank u!!💖💖

BAHAHA AWW TYY IM GLAD U LIKE IT SO MUCH!! i saw u re-reading it recently on wattpad and ur comments always have me dying. also im just gonna address your other ask here in this one, but as u know seb has now met mr.clemons, and you 10000% nailed the dynamic between seb and clora's dad LMFAOO, they will absolutely bond over disagreeing with how careless she is and wanting to protect her/stressing over her LOOL. ty again for all ur messages, i love seeing how much u love my art/fic😭💖

OMG u are so right i need to draw this

also god idk....following the sebinis example, i guess they'd be...sebora?? reminds me of sephora LMAO. ive also had someone call them "alliteration shipping" which i think is so cute BAHAHA. HONESTLY PPL CAN JUST SAY WHATEVER THEY WANT, i aint picky.

oh god its been too long since ive read the books (tho i do really wanna re-read them esp in the winter) but my fav movie is half blood prince, just because i love all the ron/hermione moments and the highschool drama BAHAHA. what do u mean harry potter isnt a romcom??? ok and last but DEFS not least

THE UNHINGED ENERGY OF THIS ASK CRACKED ME UP SO MUCH WHEN U SENT IT BAHAHAH, couldnt even fit the whole thing in my screenshot. IM GLAD U LIKED/HATED THE CHAP, and also your pfp just makes everything you say funnier, i love it LMAOOO. ty🙏🙏

[waterloggedsoliloquy]

mutual 1: sorry the update for my webcomic this week is a bit late! i really had to rush it so it prolly looks really sloppy lol [some of the most sophisticated comic art ive ever seen]

mutual 2: call me uterine lining the way astarions cervix got me bleeding profusely

mutual 3: do you think nanowrimo will give me a posthumous pity publishing deal if i mention it in my suicide note

mutual 4: okay fine i finally started revolutionary girl utena

mutual 5: does columbo know the service he did for butch lesbians. for all of us

mutual 6: wish you were here [blurry picture set of conifer woods in early autumn evening, taken as if frantically running down a winding trail]

mutual 4: im pretty hardy i dont need the trigger list but thanks for looking out for me guys

mutual 7: good morning lovelies another day the wizard tried to best me and another day i successfully locked him in the spare bathroom lol hope u like drinking shampoo fucker

mutual 8: here is a zip of every yuri manga scan i have and here is a backup in case i get dcma'd. the himejoshi lifestyle will never die

mutual 9: i wish i could go back in time to the shinzo abe assassination and ask to hold the doohickey

mutual 10: here's my essay on how wanting to be loved is the same as wanting to be eaten. three paragraphs in you'll find out that this is 100% tied to an obscure beauty and the beast manga i've been reading lately and how much i want to fuck the beast

mutual 4: oh thats why there was the trigger list.

mutual 11: YOU CAN'T LOCK ME IN THIS BATHROOM FOREVER

mutual 12: why do i have to defend my thesis to people i dont even respect. im not dickriding you just give me the degree

mutual 13: its just me and this scab ive picked into my scalp against the world

mutual 14: my little dragon got glazed and is ready to go into the kiln! everyone wish him good luck!

mutual 3: nvm i am a beautiful genius. perhaps the most beautiful genius of all

mutual 15: i think we should give david lynch rpgmaker and whatever happens happens

mutual 16: kpeyboaatrds brpokem gpuys

mutual 17: also heres my work in progress glossary of mixtec words! i still have a long way to go but i love being able to preserve my roots even in this small way

mutual 4: i just finished the black rose arc. question: what

mutual 18: i need emet-selch to be my wife

mutual 19: i need glados to be my husband

mutual 20: visited the ocean today!!! <3 beach pics!!! there is a darkness growing within me

mutual 21: the forms for my legal name change came in. pls vote in this poll of what my middle name should be: Dill Pickle (Dickle for short), Optimus Prime, Tumblr User Gorgonicteratologist, Smeve

mutual 22: just finished my 100th book of the year! this weeks read was the uses of enchantment by the psychologist bruno bettelheim,

mutual 23: reeses penis butter cups lol

mutual 4: i need to hunt akio for sport

mutual 24: oouugghhrgh. hot. dog.

mutual 25: your favorite character or fictional other would want you to brush your teeth and wash your face so you're well rested and wake up feeling refreshed! make them proud!

mutual 26: being a delivery driver isnt the worst job ive ever had but i do keep wondering what itd be like to drive off into the wild blue yonder one day and not come back

mutual 27: weird dog? [phone picture of critically endangered stork]

mutual 28: i think the two phone line polls in front of my house are having a lovers tryst. no way to prove it tho

mutual 4: WHAT

mutual 29: while you bitches are balduring your gates or finalling those fantasies im doing what a REAL gamer does. playing a b tier rpg that came out in 2004 for the 18th time

mutual 30: ^ real. hamtaro ham ham heartbreak is a masterpiece of interactive art. im not even going to call it a video game at this point

mutual 4: THAT'S HOW IT ENDS?! ANTHY?

mutual 31: can you help me pick which drawing looks better: 34% overlay or 36% soft light?

mutual 32: new video essay out. its called disability in video game narratives: final fantasy 14's most reliable fault. i churned the script out over an all-nighter and my mic crapped out halfway through but by god i did it

mutual 33: my new zine bundle is out! if you buy it you also get a discount on all my game jam games! i really cant wait for you to play them!

mutual 4: yall should watch revolutionary girl utena

[abysseung]

SOULMATE ‘❗️’ TRACKER — n. rk.

SCAMMERS… TRACKERS NEED TO LOVE TOO BUT NEVER SCAM ABOUT SOULMATES, YOUR SOULMATE COULD BE A VICTIM

・❥・After one lesson in soulmate mythology, you couldn’t help but figure out who your soulmate is. You’ve read books and articles yet you couldn’t find the love of your life. You nearly gave up until you encountered a business called “Soulmate Tracker.” You wasted all your money on this business and to your surprise, your soulmate was the one person you never wished for.

CHECK OUT … soulmate dilemma !

PAIRING ➸ enemy!niki x fem!reader

GENRE ➸ smau, crack, fluff, highschool au, soulmate au, enemies 2 lovers

WARNINGS ➸ profanity & scamming; each chapter has its warning

FEATURING ➸ enhypen eunchae of lesserafim liz of ive theo of p1harmony

NOTE ➸ THIS SMAU IS PURE FICTION, ALL THE IDOLS MENTIONED IN THIS DO NOT REFLECT WITH THEIR ACTUAL LIFE AND CAREER. THIS IS A NON-IDOL ALTERNATIVE UNIVERSE

STATUS ➸ completed

↳ START ➸ 11/27/22

↳ END ➸ 03/02/23

AUTHORS NOTE ➸ omfg i’m finally making a fanfic for the loml. i felt like making an e2l enha smau so here i am. pls support this fic and enjoy !! (i always wanted to make an e2ls and there arent much niki e2l smaus) SONA SPEAKING !! (PLEASE READ) i changed my url but im afraid i can’t update the links bc tumblr isn’t letting me 😞 i will let u guys know that i update the links once tumblr lets me but for now please read st through the tags and hope that i’ll change the links soon :) thank you <3

TAGLIST ➸ taglist is closed thank you for the support !

☆ playlist — « unbelievable like tv ; a world of you and me »

PLEASE DO NOT SPAM LIKE :) SPAM REBLOGS = OK! ; SPAM LIKE = BLOCK!

PROFILES ➸ relationship status: single❗️soulmate scammers

STEP 01 — soulmate wya

STEP 02 — destiny

STEP 03 — unprofessional fr

STEP 04 — tf does that mean

STEP 05 — screaming rn

STEP 06 — biddy buddy

STEP 07 — furry allegations

STEP 08 — no social skills = no soulmate

STEP 09 — insert oh my reference

STEP 10 — not funny, did not laugh

STEP 11 — isn’t that…illegal?? 😨

STEP 12 — wanna know something cool

STEP 13 — jaw dropping rn

STEP 14 — evil laughs

STEP 15 — strings attached

STEP 16 — prayed for my downfall

STEP 17 — hands in head

STEP 18 — government name

STEP 19 — heeseung ftw

STEP 20 — soulmate tracker 2.0

STEP 21 — giggling my toes off

STEP 22 — HEESEUNG MOVE

STEP 23 — shitting my pants

STEP 24 — #firstdate #hearteyes

STEP 25 — jump if u enjoy my pain

STEP 26 — i sorry very

STEP 27 — painful to watch

STEP 28 — character development

STEP 29 — scammer x victim

LAST STEP — ummm what 🙈

enhypen masterlist

[just-aake]

Boundless Devotion - Part IV

Pairing: princess!Natasha Romanoff x fem!reader

Summary: MedievalAU. Natasha is the eldest princess of the Romanov Kingdom. As the time of her coronation approaches, she is suddenly forced to make a decision – either find herself a partner or her parents will choose one for her.

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15

Warnings: slight fluff, slight angst

Words: 4898

A few days have passed since the night of the ball, and you find yourself back at the castle, this time for your usual meeting with Queen Melina. 

Beyond her role as the kingdom's ruler, the queen has always had a keen interest in the sciences — a passion you also shared since you were young.

As a result, you frequently visit the castle to engage in discussions and assist with her latest discoveries and experiments. 

However, recently, your focus has shifted toward some of her previous contributions, especially the ones during the war between the Romanov and Stark kingdoms.

You shuffle in your chair again as you attempt to analyze the information on the parchment before you.

Normally, it wouldn’t take this long, but you can’t seem to concentrate. Your mind is too distracted trying to find the right moment to ask her your questions. 

The sounds of scribbling in the library stop, causing you to look up.

You find that Queen Melina has paused in her writing and set her quill down, looking at you knowingly. 

“Let’s take a break,” she offers.

The two of you decide to move closer to the fireplace for your conversation, and you hand her a cup of tea before sitting on one of the chairs beside her.   

Queen Melina nods her head at you as she takes a sip, indicating for you to speak. 

You lean forward in your seat, eager to discuss your recent findings from your readings.

“In one of the books you gave me, there was a mention of something called the Black Widow operations. I tried to find more information, but there weren't any further details about it anywhere.”

“That’s because it was a secret operation created by your father and me during the war. Only a select few are aware of its existence and purpose,” she explains.

Your shoulders slump at the revelation.

If this operation was a kingdom secret, it's likely you won't be able to uncover any more details about it.

Melina observes your crestfallen expression carefully before making a decision.

“Do you know about the black widow spider?” she asks you.

You look at her in surprise, realizing that she intends to continue discussing this restricted subject with you.

When you shake your head, she continues, “They're named after the tendency of the female species to consume the male after mating.” 

Setting her cup down on the table, she turns her attention to you.

“Your father has always found that concept intriguing — the betrayal of a loved one.”

Of course he would.

You can't help but roll your eyes, hardly surprised at your father's cruel fascination with such an idea.

The queen proceeds with her explanation.

“The Black Widow operations were based on this idea. At the time, I had recently developed a serum that relaxes a person's mind and their compulsions. Combined with your father’s conditioning methods, we were able to develop a new way of gaining information from our enemies.” 

“By controlling them,” you interject, already suspecting the true nature of the operations. 

She nods in acknowledgment, confirming your suspicion.

“Once activated by a handler, the affected subjects would unknowingly search for the information that we needed and relay it to us without ever realizing what they were doing.”

“So these subjects were unaware of what happened to them?”

Your hands clench involuntarily at the unsettling thought of being controlled without knowing to eventually betray your loved ones.

“This was during the time of war,” the queen reminds you. “The Stark Kingdom had made significant advances in their weaponry, and we needed something to help shift the balance. Your father ensured that the process wiped away all memory of the conditioning.” 

Her gaze becomes solemn as she gazes into the crackling fire.

“Initially, that was the sole purpose of these operations — to gather intelligence. But as the war dragged on, Dreykov grew restless.”

She continues with a sigh, “So, he expanded the operations beyond controlling just the subjects' thoughts, but also their actions. He believed that this would be the key to victory in the war.”

“But you didn’t agree,” you say as more of an observation than a question.

Melina nods, her expression tinged with regret.

“Dreykov and I had shared similar ideals and aspirations for many years. We would have done anything to win the war for a better future for the kingdom.”

“What changed?” you ask, curious about the turning point in their history.

Her gaze softens, a faint smile on her lips as she reminisces.

“Well, everything appears different when you are about to start a family.”

Realization dawns on you as you remember.

Natasha was born near the end of the war.

Melina lets out a sad exhale as she continues. 

“I could sense that the Starks, too, were growing weary of the war. They already had a son and were expecting another child soon,” she adds, her voice laced with understanding. “And for a moment, I believe your father also understood what I meant…when he had you.” 

Your expression turns doubtful at her words, but the queen doesn’t notice as she finishes.

“So, a peace treaty was made between the two kingdoms, stopping the war. Everything was supposed to be okay.” 

“But it wasn’t.”

You can continue this part of history. Everybody knows of the tragedies that followed immediately after the war's end.

“My mother was killed in a fire by enemies seeking revenge on my father. And soon after, the captain of the Stark kingdom murdered King Howard, Queen Maria, and their newborn daughter, leaving the surviving son, Prince Tony, to assume the throne.”

You furrow your brows at an unnerving thought.

"The captain…he was a part of the operations, wasn't he?" you inquire, piecing together the connections.

“I don’t know,” the queen admits with a heavy sigh. "Your father was still grieving when I confronted him about it, but he denied any involvement."

She shakes her head at the memory.

“Nevertheless, I closed the Red Room and put an end to the Black Widow operations, and any further research on them has been sealed and restricted ever since.”

You look down at your hands sadly at the information.

“So, there was no method developed to undo the conditioning on those affected,” you conclude.

Melina gives you a sympathetic look and places a reassuring hand on your shoulder for comfort.

You let out a disappointed sigh. That means you’re back to where you originally started in your research. 

A silence follows for a moment before the queen decides to speak, her tone more lighthearted to contrast the somber atmosphere.

“I’m glad to see you and Natasha are close again.”

When you look at her in surprise at the shift in conversation, she raises her eyebrow at you, teasingly adding.

“Well, closer. I heard about your little display the other night.”   

You flush under her gaze as you hide your face behind your hand, still embarrassed at the memory. 

The two of you were swaying slowly to the soft music in an isolated corner of the dance floor, within perfect view of the other nobles in the ballroom.

“I have an idea,” Natasha says with a smirk.

You are about to question her when Natasha suddenly tilts her head and leans in, her face covering yours from the watchful eyes of the other nobles. 

You close your mouth in surprise, your next words lost as your eyes widen.

From everyone else’s perspective, it appeared as though the princess just leaned in to kiss you. 

In reality, Natasha’s lips hover just above yours.

A breath’s distance separated the two of you. If you move even a little, your lips will touch hers. You feel your heart beat faster at the thought.

Before you can react any further, Natasha pulls away, her eyes shining with amusement as she teases you.

“That expression on your face is really cute.”

Internally groaning at the memory, you feel your face grow even warmer in embarrassment.

After Natasha's bold move, there is no denying what the other nobles believe is your current relationship with the princess. 

The point becomes even more evident when Kate's excited exclamation at the sight of the two of you supposedly kissing draws the attention of everyone in the room.

Melina lets out an amused chuckle at your reaction.

“I’ve always known you two would be a good match.”

You lower your hands from your face and tilt your head, puzzled by her comment.

What did she mean by ‘a good match’?

Just as you're about to ask her for clarification, a knock at the library doors interrupts you.

Natasha steps into the room, her gaze shifting between you and her mother.

“Are you finished with Y/n?” she asks.

Melina waves her hand in dismissal.

“Go ahead, I remember what it was like to be young and in love.”

Natasha rolls her eyes and extends her hand to you, nodding towards the exit.

"Let's hurry before she starts sharing her old love stories."

As you're leaving, Melina calls out to you both, “Y/n, please join us for dinner tonight. And Natasha, don’t be late again.”

You nod in acknowledgment as Natasha groans and pulls you out through the doors.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

Natasha strolls beside you along the stone paths that lead to the castle’s garden.

Besides the gardeners, other castle staff barely go through this area, leaving the both of you isolated from prying eyes or ears.

After checking that nobody else was around, she turns to you with a question that she’s been wondering about since the night of the ball. 

“So my plan was to pretend until after my coronation. What exactly is your plan?”

You raise your brow teasingly at her.

“What, you don’t want to be in this fake relationship with me forever?”

Natasha huffs in disbelief, shoving your shoulder with hers lightly.

“I’d marry you myself if it means you don’t have to be with that jerk.” 

And she was serious. You were her closest friend and an important person in her life. She would do anything to make sure you were safe and happy.

You smile softly at her, shaking your head in refusal.

“I just need time to look for someone else suitable enough to replace Lord Rumlow.”

“Better than me?” Natasha teases.

You chuckle, rolling your eyes exasperatedly as you walk ahead of her. 

Reaching the garden’s entrance, you stop and turn around to face her with a serious expression.

“Alright, we should get our story straight.”

Natasha gives you an amused look.

“What do you mean?”

“We need to come up with how we became a couple,” you explain.

Natasha crosses her arms and tilts her head in thought before shrugging. 

“There’s not much to come up with,” she reasons. “It’s a typical story. A princess and her childhood friend. One day, the friend realizes her feelings for the princess, confesses, and then they decide to be together.” 

You raise your brows playfully at her words, barely concealing your grin.

“Somebody’s confident.”

In response, Natasha gracefully plucks a red rose from a nearby bush, a teasing smirk on her lips, as she leans in close and offers it to you.

“You’re the one who said I could get anybody in this kingdom to fall for me.”

You accept the flower with an amused laugh, gently pushing her away. 

“Well, I’m not just anybody,” you tell her as you brush past her into the garden.

Natasha watches you go with a soft smile before following after you. 

“Alright then, let’s say that I was the one who fell first and confessed to you,” she offers, catching up to you. “We don’t need to reveal anything more than necessary.”

You nod in agreement, stopping and turning back around to face her again. 

“Then what about how we act around each other?”

Natasha’s brows furrow in confusion.

“What’s wrong with how we usually act?”

You wave your hand, gesturing vaguely in the air.

“I’m talking about other things, you know, like affectionate touches or….” your voice trails off as you think of the other things couples typically do.

“Kissing?” Natasha finishes for you with an amused smirk.

“I have never seen your face turn that red before,” she says with a light chuckle at the memory of the other night. “I’m not sure how long we’d be able to pull this off if you are constantly blushing at my actions.”

Your expression turns into a pout at her teasing.

“You just caught me by surprise. Anybody would be flustered in my position.” 

“I’m not so sure about that,” Natasha replies, confident in her ability to maintain composure since she is used to the many flirtations from the other nobles and was unfazed by all of their attempts before.

“You don’t think I can make you flustered too?” you ask as you place your hands innocently atop her shoulders.

Natasha tilts her head and squints suspiciously at you, unconvinced.

“You can try,” she says skeptically.

A sly grin appears on your lips at the challenge. 

Without hesitation, your hands glide down from her shoulders and rest against her front, just above her chest. You move in close, your bodies not quite touching but enough for her to feel your warmth. 

Natasha’s eyes widen slightly in surprise but she doesn’t step away, unwilling to back down.

Your face leans in slowly until your lips hover a breath away from hers, mimicking what she did the other night. But then your voice drops to a low whisper against her lips.

“Are you sure about that?”

Natasha locks her gaze onto yours, and for a moment, the world around her fades until her only focus is you. Her words seem caught in her throat as she feels her heart quicken slightly.

Your head shifts to the side, breathing gently against her neck before moving your lips up next to her ear. 

“Gotcha,” you murmur. 

You pull back swiftly and step away, removing your touch from her body and innocently clasping your hands behind you. Your eyes sparkle with triumph as you tilt your head teasingly.

“Looks like the princess can blush after all.” 

Natasha blinks, momentarily caught off guard as she raises a hand to rub at her warm cheeks in surprise, feeling a faint blush spreading. She coughs lightly, regaining her composure.

“Not bad,” she admits absently. 

Your smile widens in victory as you reach for her hand, intertwining your fingers. 

“We don’t actually have to kiss.” Waving your clasped hands, you tell her. “Touches like this should be good enough for the public.”

You pull her towards the castle. 

“Come on, Natasha, we wouldn’t want to be late.”

Natasha hums distractedly in acknowledgment, but her focus remains on your clasped hands as she wonders to herself. 

Why was her heart still racing?

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

On the way to the dining hall, you noticed that Natasha was oddly quiet, but when you glanced back at her, she offered you her usual smile. 

As you enter, you see Queen Melina and Yelena are already seated at their respective positions at the table. King Alexei is away on a short trip to the neighboring kingdom, so his seat at the other end is empty. 

An additional chair which you assume is yours has been placed next to the other empty one beside the queen.

Natasha goes to pull out the chair next to her usual seat for you, but Melina stops her.

“Natasha, move over for Y/n. We have much to discuss.”

Yelena begins to laugh at her mother’s blatant display of favoritism, but she masks it with fake coughs when the queen shoots her a disapproving look.

Rolling her eyes, Natasha complies with her mother’s request, pulling out her usual chair for you instead. As she pushes you in, she leans down to whisper, “I told you, she likes you more.”

Melina looks between her two daughters and remarks sarcastically, “Oh, I’m sorry, did you or Yelena suddenly develop an interest in my experiments?” 

Yelena hastily shakes her head, diverting her attention to petting Fanny beside her.

You tilt your head at Natasha in confusion as she settles in the seat next to you.

“I thought you liked to hear about her experiments.” 

Over the years, you’ve frequently talked with Natasha about your sessions with the queen, and she always seems genuinely interested in what you say.

Melina arches a brow at Natasha. “The last time I tried to discuss my findings with you, you brushed me off and told me that you would simply read about them in your next lessons.”

Natasha shrugs indifferently as she replies, “It’s more interesting when Y/n explains it.” 

Melina gasps in offense at her daughter’s words.

Yelena’s expression shifts into a teasing smirk as she gestures between her sister and you.

“What she means is she just enjoys listening to Y/n talk.”

Natasha discreetly kicks Yelena under the table in reprimand. 

“Ow,” Yelena shoots a glare at her before turning to her dog.

“Fanny, bite,” she commands.

The dog playfully bounds under the table toward Natasha, only to stop abruptly at the sight of a treat in your hand.

You toss the treat to Fanny and pat her head as she happily settles down beside you.

Yelena gasps in mock betrayal at her dog. 

As the dinner meals are brought out and set down on the table, Melina turns her attention to you.

“So, Y/n, what are your plans for tomorrow?”

“I’m heading into town for some errands,” you reply.

“Oh, will Natasha be joining you as well?”

You pause, a bit surprised by her question. You definitely were not expecting to have Natasha join you on your trip tomorrow.

“I am?” Natasha asks for you.

“Well, since you two don’t have to hide your relationship anymore, this would be a great opportunity for you to have a date,” Melina suggests.

“That’s…right,” you say, looking at Natasha nervously, realizing the implication. “We can go on dates in public now.”

Melina narrows her eyes disapprovingly at her daughter.

“Unless you are too busy training to take Y/n on a proper date, Natasha?” she asks accusingly.

Before Natasha can respond, the doors of the dining room burst open, drawing everyone’s attention.

King Alexei enters joyfully and makes his way to his chair while greeting everyone.

“Sorry I’m late, my family—ah and Y/n, nice to see you again—I have an exciting new story to tell you about my journey!”

Melina gives him a questioning look at his presence.

“We weren’t expecting you back until tomorrow,” she remarks.

King Alexei waves his hand nonchalantly.

“The guards wanted to get back sooner after the attack on the road.” 

A plate is set down in front of him before he continues.

“That’s the story I wanted to share with you all. There I was, surrounded by twenty mercenaries, all pointing their weapons at me.”

“Wait, you were ambushed?” Natasha interrupts with concern.

He grins and nods, his eyes glinting with excitement.

“Aye, it was exhilarating. I haven’t felt this energized since my days in the war. You know, this reminds me of the time when I had to fight with one arm and leg broken.”

Yelena waves her hand dismissively, commenting, “We’ve heard that story many times already. Can we get back to the ambush?”

“Yelena!” Melina chastises.

“What? Obviously, it turned out okay if he’s here now,” she defends herself.

The queen rubs her head in exhaustion at her family before standing up.

“I’m sorry, Y/n, you’ll have to excuse me. Apparently, I need to speak with my husband and the captain in private.”

With that, she drags King Alexei out of the dining room, leaving the three of you to finish up your meals.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

“You didn’t have to come with me.”

Your voice breaks the silence in the carriage, pulling Natasha from her thoughts. She turns to you, sitting beside her in the carriage.

Registering your words, she scoffs in disbelief.

“After what happened to my father, you’re lucky I didn’t just have you stay the night at the castle.” 

Your head tilts in thought at the idea.

“It has been a while since we’ve had a sleepover at the castle.”

Natasha shrugs before commenting, “I’m not opposed to the idea.”

Her smile takes on a teasing expression.

“Though it may be inappropriate now that we’re technically a couple. Imagine the rumors that would spread if someone saw that you spent the night in my room.”

Your face flushes a light shade of red at her words, and Natasha’s smile widens at the sight. She’s growing fond of being the cause of such blushes on your face. It was quickly becoming her new favorite expression from you. 

You shoot her a playful glare, already knowing she was teasing you on purpose.

“Or I could just stay in one of the guest rooms.”

“But that’s no fun,” Natasha sighs in mock disappointment.

The conversation drifts off into a peaceful silence for a moment before Natasha recalls her mother’s earlier comment.

“You know, I can come with you tomorrow into town if you’d like,” Natasha suggests hopefully. She misses spending time with you like the way the two of you used to do.

You shake your head in refusal, replying with an understanding tone, “You don’t have to, Natasha. I know you have other things you need to do.”

Frowning at your words, Natasha rests her hand atop yours before responding sincerely, “I’ll always have time for you.” 

She leans against your shoulder, bumping it lightly. 

“Besides, my mother's right. This will give us a chance to show our ‘relationship’ to the public.”

You let out a laugh in disbelief.

“So we’re going to have a date because of your mother’s suggestion?”

Natasha gives you a pointed look.

“We wouldn’t want her to become suspicious. We have to make it seem like we’ve been together in secret for a while already.”

Your expression turns contemplative and you let out a worried sigh at the reminder.

“Then maybe we should practice things like kisses on the cheeks or the hands too so that we’ll look more comfortable with each other if it ever comes up,” you wonder out loud.

Natasha feels her heart quicken slightly at your words, but then she regains her composure, clearing her throat and shaking away that strange feeling in her chest.

“Do you want to try?” she finds herself asking without thinking.

Natasha watches as you ponder in thought before nodding at her with a determined expression. Facing forward with your cheek towards her, you close your eyes tightly in anticipation.

“Okay, go ahead,” you say.

Natasha holds in a laugh at your adorable expression as you wait for her to kiss you on the cheek. She can’t help but tease you as she leans in.

“Why are you so tense?” 

You open your eyes and turn to her defensively.

“I’m not—“ 

Both of your eyes widen in surprise when Natasha’s lips brush softly against the corner of your mouth.

The two of you remain in that position for a moment, too shocked to move.

Eventually, Natasha is the one who pulls away first, her eyes locked onto yours. It feels just like that moment in the garden where everything around her disappears, her heart racing like before.

When you lightly bite your lips where she had touched yours, Natasha finds herself drawn to you at the movement, unconsciously leaning in again.  

“We have arrived, Your Highness,” the coachman calls out as the carriage slows to a stop.

That brings Natasha back to reality as she pulls herself back in surprise. She looks away from you, clearing her throat lightly to find her voice before responding to him. 

“Okay, thank you.” 

When she turns back to you, she finds your head slightly ducked and looking away, a definite blush on your cheeks. 

The carriage door is opened by your night gatekeeper who helps you out of the carriage. Natasha follows you soon after, rubbing her neck nervously.

“Y/n, about that kiss…,” Natasha trails off, seemingly at a loss for words. 

You chuckle lightly at the sight of the usually confident princess reacting so shyly, so you decide to make sure she knows that everything is still okay between the two of you, despite the accidental touch.

Raising your hand to cup her face, you lean up and give her a soft kiss against her cheek.

When you pull away, Natasha gives you a confused look. 

“There, now we’re even,” you tell her in reassurance.

“Well, that display certainly confirms the rumors I’ve been hearing,” a sudden voice interrupts.

Both you and Natasha turn towards the source and see your father descending the stairs toward the two of you.

Natasha gives him a polite nod and smiles in greeting.

Despite being close friends with you for years, this is probably the first time that she has met your father personally outside of formal events. 

“Good evening, Lord Dreykov.”

“Princess Natasha,” he greets, giving her a curt nod.

“I see you’ve brought my daughter home from her frivolous activities,” he continues with a condescending tone, his harsh words aimed at you.

Natasha’s smile fades at his tone and the insulting comment towards you. She turns to give you a questioning look but finds your head ducked toward the ground, avoiding her gaze.

Returning her attention to your father, Natasha remarks coldly.

“I don’t believe we’ve ever had a proper conversation with each other.”

“No, the last time I saw you, you were still a child,” Lord Dreykov states, examining her critically, his eyes scrutinizing her. “Some in the kingdom might even argue that you're still a child now, hardly ready to rule.”

Natasha smirks confidently in understanding, her posture straightening at the challenge. She’s no stranger to facing older nobles who are wary about her capabilities of taking the throne. 

“I assure you that I am fully prepared to follow in my mother's footsteps. Though, I am open to insights from those who believe they know better.“

He scoffs at her words.

“My suggestion would be to not tread the same path as your mother.”

“Do you disagree with the decisions she made for the kingdom?" Natasha questions.

Lord Dreykov waves his hand dismissively as he admits, “Queen Melina possesses a brilliant mind, especially when it comes to her scientific discoveries and experiments.” 

His voice shifts into a tone of disdain.

“However, her choices as the ruler of our kingdom — let’s just say, not everyone views her decision to accept a peace treaty when victory was within reach as a wise choice.” 

“And yet both kingdoms have been at peace with each other for over two decades,” Natasha points out, her voice unwavering.

“If that is what you believe, then allow me to offer another piece of advice, Your Highness,” he says, feigning politeness.

“Peace is often just a thin veil, concealing the demons lurking underneath. You can never predict when a friend one day may suddenly become your enemy the next.”

His tone remained neutral, but Natasha sensed a subtle warning in his words. She is about to argue when she feels your hand grab hers. 

Natasha looks over to you and finds your face now pale, just like that moment back at the ball when you were speaking with Lord Rumlow. 

Glancing down, she notices your hand trembling slightly as you hold hers, but you quickly cover your clasp hands with your other hand, stopping the shaking.

Concern fills Natasha’s eyes as she studies your face.

She has never seen you in this kind of state before, so unsure and frightened.

Her eyes narrow as she glances suspiciously at Lord Dreykov, but another tug of her hand redirects her attention back to you.

You look at her with pleading eyes, whispering to her.

“Natasha, just go home.” 

Lord Dreykov lifts his head at her, haughtily.

“Indeed, it is growing dark soon. We wouldn’t want anything to happen to the princess on her way home, now would we?”

Natasha clenches her teeth at the sight of his smug expression, unable to hide her new disdain for the noble.

“Natasha, please.”

At your words, Natasha dispels her tense posture before turning to you with a gentle expression.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Y/n,” she promises, bringing your slightly trembling hands to her lips in a light kiss.

She shoots Lord Dreykov a suspicious glance before retreating into the carriage.

Once the carriage disappears from view, you let out a breath of relief before turning to your father with a sigh.

His hand emerges from behind him, and you involuntarily flinch at the sight of his raised hand, closing your eyes to brace yourself. 

When you feel him pat your head, you cautiously open your eyes and see him smiling coldly at you, his eyes glinting with a sinister look.

“I was disappointed when you told me you were no longer close to the princess, but this…making her fall for you,” he scoffs, mockingly. “Maybe you are not as useless as I thought.”

As he leaves, his words weigh heavy on your heart, leaving you filled with worry. You’re no longer sure if you made the right decision with this plan anymore.

~~~~~~~ ⧗ ~~~~~~~

Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4 | Part 5 | Part 6 | Part 7 | Part 8 | Part 9 | Part 10 | Part 11 | Part 12 | Part 13 | Part 14 | Part 15

Series Masterlist : Boundless Devotion

a/n: Thank you for reading!

Taglist: @lightwhoranoutoflight, @taliiiaasteria, @romanoffprentiss, @canvascoloredin,  @silentwolfsstuff, @blacklightsposts, @arcturusseer, @presser24, @dvrkhcld, @jujuu23, @screechcat, @vivs46

[coriphallus]

A little rant on patch 6 and the implications for bg3's future

Okay, bear with me for a sec its gonna go somewhere eventually. My first bg3 run (thats spammed here on this blog) i played ascended astarion/dark urge romance where i picked the reject bhaal and become the absolute ending.

as it was my first playthrough on release i was vibrating off mt seat and i didnt really have elaborate HCs or anything, i was just doing a quick evil run until the bugs get sorted out. i didn't think much beyond "yes this dude would want the shiny stones for himself"

first time i saw astarion enthralled, i was confused. he asked me to do it, he was quite insistent on it since the beginning of the game. i was confused for a couple of hours, digesting the entire game i just played. Then it hit me; the game was calling me out. it was telling me ive been stupid for not having seen this coming and at that point i felt awe.

it was right, everything pointed to this, it was right in front of my eyes all i needed was to connect the dots that the game laid out quite visibly and i was just too caught up to see.

'well my durge would never do that' didnt matter because thats exactly what the companions thought. Gale thought the powers of an insatiable weave wouldnt corrupt him, that he'd stay true to himself, shadowheart thought shar had blessed and her she'd guide her, that she could be her true self under her influence, astarion thought he'd be free, that he'd cherish the bond he'd made with the player but at the end of the day power reveals; and when that power is acquired through the corpses of thousands its quite evident that Absolute power corrupts absolutely. IT WAS IN THE FKIN NAME.

it was a shining bait i was so focused on getting my hands on that i didn't look back to see the mountain of corpses i had to step on to get there. the game was telling me 'HEY LOOK AT EVERYTHING YOU'VE DONE TO GET HERE, LOOK AT WHAT HAPPENED TO ALL THE OTHERS WHO THOUGHT THEY COULD ACHIEVE THIS, DO YOU THINK YOU'D HOLD HANDS AND SING KUMBAYA WITH YOUR FRIENDS AFTER ALL THIS?'

just as there was never an option where frodo could stab saurons flaming eyeball and sit on his throne with the ring on his finger and sam at his side, there was never an ending i could get my 'happy ending' the way id like it to. i wanted frodo to remain in middle earth and have some peace in the end, i didnt understand how he was 'too changed' to remain and sam wasnt when i first read the books. i was angry even, that i didnt get what i wanted. it wasnt like tolkien haphazardly put together an ending out of his ass bcs he didnt know what to do with the characters, its not that he didn't think while writing that the fans would hate it, he wrote a story that achieved its catharsis by reaching its narrative conclusion. it couldnt have done that any other way. it was deliberate. i may not have understood or agreed at the time but it was the story he wanted to tell, and it wouldnt be one of the greatest stories ever told if the writer wanted to please a 10 y/o like myself.

it was never out of character for my durge at all, i was just blissfully avoiding the NARRATIVE.

months later we get this absolute narrative abomination:

and all i can say is im worried.

im worried bcs this is a clear disrespect to the story they've written, im worried bcs if they can do off with huge plot elements and beats such as this just like that it shows a lack of commitment to their own plot and if a huge Point of the game can be treated like a minor mistake than what else can? was is just a lack of oversight that laezel gets killed under vlaakith? can it be waved off if enough vlaakith loving gith players come together and shout loud enough that they want to ride alongside their queen with their gith gf?

what part of the game is tangible to hold on to, and after two years worth of patches that are made to appease the fans at the expense of the story, will it still be the game i fell in love with?

i dont blame the fans for wanting, i blame the devs for delivering. that they could sacrifice the integrity of a pretty straightforward story bodes ill tidings for the future of this game.

yes i wanted this feature, but i was glad i wasn't given it. i may have been confused and slightly miffed that i didn't get to reign supreme with my evil bf, but i immensely respected the game that could call me out on it. i wish they could show the same respect to their own writing.