#its just all the vertical media

[kim-woonhak]

sorry in advance if you've already answered a question like this but i just wanted to ask, how do you improve on drawing?? i think especially for things like coloring, shading, and lighting , its been difficult for me to be happy with how it looks because compared to the sketch (that i think already looks nice) the colors just seem sort of flat and muddy and i feel like i dont have a good grip on what colors to put where and how to make it look unflatt if that makes sense! just curious on maybe what kinds of practices and studying you do for this(if any))<33 obv you dont have to answer if you dont want to, and thank you for being one of my inspirations, love youu<33333

hihi!! for simply shading/lighting, i would suggest you only work in black and white until you're totally comfortable with developing values. why? marco bucci explains it really nicely in this video but basically if you have good values u can have absolutely garbage nonsense colors and it will still make sense aka when i did this lol:

i'm guessing you're more interested in colored artwork though since black and white drawings can't be "flat and muddy" bc theyre in grayscale lol. for coloring, this is so tough for me too so i thought about this for a day or so and i came up with 3 tips that might help^^ 1) getting colors directly from photo reference or color reference, 2) manually adding filters/color harmony, and 3) studying color theory

i always work from photo reference so it informs a lot of my coloring/shading/lighting and often when i don't understand what color I'm looking at i directly just eye drop it and realize that what i thought was purple was actually just a gray-red. working from an actual picture helps make sure my colors don't look strange and while i used to think eye-dropping felt like "cheating" when i worked digitally honestly i've learned a lot from it and honestly if i stare at a color long enough i can get it pretty accurately now but i'm just too lazy so eye-dropping just speeds up my workflow (plus i hate digital color pickers anyways they r not built for artists and i wrote an entire paper on it in college once lmao) anyways here's an example of a color study i did by directly eye-dropping from a gif with @quokki's incredible coloring (love u ale <3)

if you're not working from a picture directly, you can still use other pictures or artwork as a "color reference" which I used to do a lot. i like to look at art from other ppl with pretty colors and create a color palette to use in my own drawings. for example, the color palette for this felix painting came from a piece (idr which) by Simón Prades on instagram but this palette is really easy to use since it's linear values it's like working in black and white but comes out looking cooler LOL

Recently for my lee know kiki's delivery service drawing i felt that the colors seemed a little flat n muddy to me because it was in an animated flat coloring style (lol) so I added a filter layer (just a flat apricot color set to overlay at 25% on photoshop) that livened up the whole thing and made it feel more cohesive. It's a pretty subtle difference to other people but made a world of difference to me :) it helped take the muddiness out of the shadows of his face and the glass reflection and took the painting from gloomy rainy day with stale bread to warm sunny day with fresh bread :]

and finally if u are interested in actually studying colors and lighting and shading and stuff these r some of the youtube videos and channels that i think do a great job explaining these very cool concepts:

pre-realism vs post-realism is a cool video about the difference between the mentality of how beginners draw vs how experts draw and kinda blew my mind tbh i think the big color takeaway from this video is that something that kids would color (like green grass) might actually be a totally different color to an artist's eye (dark yellow, red gray, even a super desaturated purple) depending on a realistic lighting situation

nathan fowkes did a 3-part guest talk series on understanding color temperature and relationships: (1) (2) (3) also not coloring but i love his video on value massing

this lecture on what charles bernard calls "the mother color principle" takes the "filtering" tip that i mentioned earlier to a much more developed level (it's an hour long so just skip through it.. u get the gist of what he's saying in a few min but the whole demo is also cool too)

i mentioned him earlier but marco bucci has many 10 min digestable videos about color on his channel that i like :) (also this lighting/value video is great too)

sorry i don't really know exactly how basic or advanced i should cater my advice but i hope this helps some anon^^ lmk if u have questions or if u ever want feedback my inbox and dms r always open

[fans4wga]

Writers Guild West Official: Era of Hollywood Mergers Hastened the Strike

August 10, 2023

Laura Blum-Smith, the Writers Guild of America West’s director of research and public policy, considers the strike a result of a tsunami of Hollywood mergers that has handed studios and streamers the power to its exploit workers.

“Harmful mergers and attempts to monopolize markets are a recurring theme in the history of media and entertainment, and they are a key part of what led 11,500 writers to go on strike more than 100 days ago against their employers,” Blum-Smith said on Thursday at an event with the Federal Trade Commission and Department of Justice over new merger guidelines unveiled in July.

She pointed to Disney, Amazon and Netflix as companies that “gained power through anticompetitive consolidation and vertical integration,” allowing them to impose “more and more precarious working conditions, increasingly short term employment and lower pay for writers and other workers across the industry.” But she sees revisions to the merger guidelines that address labor concerns a key part of the solution to prevent further mergers in the entertainment industry moving forward.

“The FTC and DOJ’s new draft merger guidelines are part of a deeply necessary effort to revive antitrust enforcement,” she added. “Compared with earlier guidelines, the new ones are much more skeptical of the idea that mergers are the natural way for companies to grow. And they focus more on the various ways mergers hurt competition, including how mergers impact workers.”

In July, the FTC and DOJ jointly released a new road map for regulatory review of mergers. They require companies to consider the impact of proposed transactions on labor, signaling that the agencies intend to review whether mergers could negatively impact wages and working conditions. FTC commissioner Alvaro Bedoya, who was joined by agency chair Lina Khan, said in a statement about the guidelines that “a merger that may substantially lessen competition for workers will not be immunized by a prediction that predicted savings from a merger will be passed on to consumers.” Historically, transactions have been considered mostly through the lens of benefits to consumers.

The guidelines lack the force of law but influence the way in which judges consider lawsuits to block proposed transactions. They also tell the public how competition enforcers will assess the potential for a merger’s harm to competition.

Antitrust enforcers have steadily been taking notice of negative impacts to labor as a result of industry consolidation. “We’ve heard concerns that a handful of companies may now again be controlling the bulk of the entertainment supply chain from content creation to distribution,” Khan said last year during a listening forum over revisions to the guidelines, in a nod to anticompetitive conduct by studios that led to the Paramount Decrees. “We’ve heard concerns that this type of consolidation and integration can enable firms to exert market power over creators and workers alike.”

Adam Conover, writer and WGA board member, said in that April 2022 forum that his show Adam Ruins Everything was killed by AT&T’s acquisition of Time Warner in 2018 when TruTV’s parent company forced the network to cut costs. He stressed that a handful of companies “now control the production and distribution of almost all entertainment content available to the American public,” allowing them to “more easily hold down our wages and set onerous terms for our employment.” It’s not just writers that are impacted by an overly consolidated Hollywood either, he explained. After Disney acquired 21st Century Fox in 2019, he said that the studios pushed the industry into ending backend participation and trapping actors in exclusive contracts preventing them from pursuing other work.

Blum-Smith said that aggressive competition enforcement is necessary as “Wall Street continues to push for more consolidation among our employers despite the industry’s history of mergers that failed to deliver any of the consumer benefits they’ve claimed that left writers and audiences worse off with less diversity of content and fewer choices.”

“More mergers will leave writers with even fewer places to sell their work and tell their stories and the remaining companies will have even more power to lower pay and worsen working conditions,” she warned. “Strong enforcement against mergers is essential to protect workers in media and workers across the country and these guidelines are an important step in the right direction.”

[the-fiction-witch]

Breathless

Media The Artful Dodger

Character Jack Dawkins

Couple Jack X Reader

Rating Flirty Af

Warning: Medical emergency / Asthma Attack

I woke, as I typically did with a sharp fast gasp. immediately I heard the wheeze in my chest like a pair of old moth-eaten bellows. I sighed and turned to my bedstand opening the little rosewood box and hearing the gentle tune of the music box inside plaid as soon as I opened it I grabbed one of the prerolled cigarettes shutting the box again and saw the candle on my bedside table still burning so I set the tip in the flame until it began to smoulder so I laid down on my back slowly but surely taking a deep inhale and blowing the resulting smoke across my ceiling. It fixed it as much as it ever did so I finished up and set the end in my little metal box with many others. 

"There's my sweet girl!" My father gleamed as he entered my bedroom with a wide smile 

"Good Morning Father," I smiled sitting up in my bed 

"It is a fantastic morning, A perfect morning for our party!" He cheered going to open my curtains to let in the sunshine 

I smiled as much as I could force, I knew this was important to him and I wanted only to be supportive. 

"I have a gift for you" He smiled tapping my nose playfully He clicked his fingers towards the door and the maid scurried in with a large box in hand, he took the box from her and set it on the bed opening the box up pulling out from the tissue and ribbon a sweet expensive new dress.

It was beautiful, A long off-the-shoulder dress of a sweet fabric a light pale pink with vertical strips of purple, and white lace at its hem, neckline and lace elbow-length sleeves with a black ribbon at its waist. It was utterly beautiful and would not have been cheap for my father to buy. but I began to panic as I looked at it seeing the ribbon and how small it was.  

I knew my father, he meant well but he always did this and always it made me fearful.

But I forced a smile "Thank you Father" I said giving his cheek a kiss 

"You're welcome, Now come along guests begin to arrive soon" He said rushing off to make preparations. 

I sighed climbing from my bed, I went and had a nice hot bath laying in the warm water for longer than I should just because it seemed to soothe my chest but I soon climbed out and went to my window in my towel looking out to the gardens.

My father was a very wealthy businessman in port with a lot of dealings coming and going in shipping, of course, our house was lustrous and grand second only to the governors only a few miles up the road, but the governor could not hold a candle to my father's gardens, well known in the area and beyond for the grandiose and beauty of the many exotic flowers and plants from all over the world, He took great pride in the garden and this combined with his utter love fort entertaining. Meant we had an awful lot of garden parties. 

Today was no exception my father was hosting a garden party and had invited everyone who could be imagined. He adored parties being an utter social butterfly, I however was more of an.... antisocial bookworm not much wanting to go but knowing word would spread if I didn't attend my father's own parties. It didn't much help my looming age knowing at the back of my mind certain men had been invited not due to my father really wanting them at the party but my father realizing they could be a good match for me so invited them in the hope one would catch my interest. But I know I am a very lucky girl, Many fathers would be insisting by now or would have wedded their daughter off for a business deal. But My father was a decent man and had always promised me I could choose my husband, that I could marry for love no matter who it would be. He felt he couldn't deny me what he and my mother had. 

I went to my mirror and began to dress, I pulled my white stockings up to my thighs adjusting them so the little lilac bows would sit forward, I pulled my long cotton underdress over my body tugging it down as far as it would go, by then my maid arrived and I gulped as she picked up my cream corset. I simply watched the mirror doing my best to not panic as she wrapped it around me and began to lace the back, I did my best to keep my breaths slow and steady but that wasn't exactly easy until finally she finished with the back, she pinned the ribbons in place and turned me to face her so she could pull the ribbons to the front to lace it again leaving me squeezed as much as possible 

"How much more?" I gasped already feeling breathless 

"Not much more Miss." she said "Pencil thin is the London style miss" She reassured

"I am not a pencil. I am a lady." I argued half of me was joking the other half was serious. 

Finally, she tied the last bow and removed the pin in the back as there was now no give in the ribbon at all, she took my crinoline the large wicker bird cage-looking thing that always made me smile a little tieing it simply around my waist and she helped me to slip on my dress, it was beautiful and I did feel very pretty even if again the lacing began as she all but sewed me into the dress ensuring it would be as close to me as possible. Not being helped by my father's purchase choices. 

"Alright miss?" she asked as she finished the last bow 

"Yes. Thank you" I lied, finally she helped me into my shoes and left to attend the party. "Women in London must have learnt not to need to breathe" I sighed I sat at my vanity and did what little make-up I bothered with before finally taking my hair from the tight braid I had done last night allowing it to now be in sweet curls. Once done I looked out to the window again seeing people had already gathered for the party so I grabbed my lace fan and my parasol and headed down to the gardens. 

"Ahhh My goodness an angel!" My father joked as he saw me "You look beautiful" He smiled 

"Thank you Father" I smiled 

"Go on then, Mingle I'll check in on you later," He told me ushering me deeper into the party, I did my rounds parasol in hand often batting my fan to try and get some air down my throat doing my best to greet and be pleasant with people. 

As I made the rounds I took note of those who were here already spotting a few men my father would have invited purely in the hopes of grabbing my attention but as I walked to a less populated area of the garden I took a seat for a moment on the stone bench I spotted a similar soul. 

He stood by one of the statues away from the main business of the party, dressed in his usual way but cleaned up a little better, he seemed awkward unsure why he was here, out of place in this bussle. I felt for him of course and for a moment even I wasn't sure why he was here. But then I recalled seeing Dr Sneed on my walk around the party and I know how my father thinks, my father would have invited Dr Sneed because he is his doctor and thus not inviting his own doctor to his party would be rude, and of course then in my fathers mind he must also invite Dr Dawkins for if he invited Sneed and Not Dawkins that too would have been rude. Honestly, I'm surprised he took up the invitation. For a moment we caught eyes and he offered me a small smile so I did my best to do so back. 

“You alright my sweet?’ my father asked as he approached sitting beside me

“Yes, just wanted a moment from all the excitement” I smiled

‘ahh well come along we are to begin the walk” he smiled to me taking my hand and soon enough the walk began, this was typical of every party my father would lead a walk around the gardens explaining almost every flower and plant giving a tour to the guests of course most ate it up but I slowly but surely slinked away until I was at the very back of the walk where I again found Dr Dawkins.

“Good day doctor”

“Good day miss y/l/n, does your father always do this?’

“Yes” I chuckled moving my parasol slightly higher as to protect him too

“AHH thank you” he smiled moving a little closer to be under the protection of the lace from the blistering sun

“Quite alright” I answered “what brings you to the party?”

“Your father invited me. Wasn't going to bother but something to do I suppose’ he chuckled

“I guess. I rather find it all tedious”

“well we agree on some things’ he chuckled “I have to admit though your dress is utterly stunning”

“Thank you doctor’ I blushed a little but had to fan myself quickly as I felt slightly breathless from the walking

“Ohh don't worry pleatenties of the party you can just call me jack” he smiled

“ohh that's very sweet, thank you jack’ I smiled “then y/n I insist”

“Why thank you, My god is he going to take us past every plant?” He whispered

“That he is” I smiled

“Any particular reason?’

‘its his pride. He adores his garden above all else?”

“Even you?’

“I don't know, I should hope not but I wouldn't be surprised’

“Why? Why would be focus so much on his garden and not his daughter?”

“He promised my other that her beloved garden would always bloom, she died only a few days later” I explained

“Ohh forgive me y/n I-”

“It's alright, he can be… overboard at times” I said doing my best to slow and catch my breath

“Are you alright?’ he asked

“Yes forgive me-”

“No no it's alright, are you sure? You seem lost for breath?’ he said carefully taking my arm

“I'm fine” I answered as I gasped trying hard not to wheeze or cry anything that might draw attention to myself he seemed panicked I tried again and gasp but it just wasn't working and I almost went over

“Whoa. I'm taking you inside’ he said quickly putting an arm around me and taking me quickly back to the house I dropped my parasol and fan as soon as I got in the door trying desperately to get my breath in “which way to your room?”

“This way” I gasped now beginning to cough and wheeze loudly taking his hand and leading him to my room as soon as I was inside I leant on my ottoman trying desperately to get some air into my lungs as he shut the door and came over

“Are you short of breath?”

“Yes” I gasped surely that was obvious

“try to breathe slow for me if you can” he asked and I did my best but that only made me wheeze louder

“Take off your dress.” He said

“I beg your pardon Dr Dawkins!’ I argued

“I need to examine you take off your dress” he said

“I cannot” I answered between gasps

“I'm a doctor I won't look y/n but I need to exmaine you” he said

“No I cannot. My maid she-”

“She's sewn you into the dress?” he asked and I nodded “alright” he said slipping off his jacket and grabbing a small knife from his pocket “I'll be as careful as I can” he said slowly using the blade to cut where my dress had been stitched by my maid until finally it released I quickly stepped away and pushed the dress off me as well as my crinoline immediately I felt a little better as I looked forward letting out slow breaths I caught sight of jack in my mirror he lied to me. He was looking. But I felt still so breathless that I tumbled onto my ottoman ‘whoa whoa! I got you. I got you.” He reassured only just catching me making me sit on the ottoman “I need to remove your corset”

“Doctor!”

“I have to remove it” he said coming to face me starting to unlace my corset ties quickly with his nimble fingers “out of curiosity. How'd your mother die?”

“Respiratory failure” I gasped and he looked up to me seeming panicked

“How old was she?”

“Twenty nine”

“Christ - for - god-” he grunted trying to deal with the knots and loops and ties in my corset until finally he unlaced the front and tried to pull it off but of course it didn't move he looked confused so I moved his hand to my back and he moved behind me seeing of course all the lacing on the back ‘oh you gotta be kidding me!’ he complained “they really didn't want you of this dress.’ he said fighting with the ties before “fuck it!’ he complained grabbing his knife again and cutting though the lacing managing to force the whole corset off me and that helped considerably “there we go.” He said a lift proud of himself “nice and slow let me listen” he said for a moment looking around the room clearly for something to use to listen but “I don't have my tools uhhh okay. Guess we have to do this the old fashioned way” he said sitting on the ottoman with me lifting my underdress up to expose my bare back I glanced in the mirror again and saw his cheeks slightly deeper with red his eyes glancing down from my neck all the way to the ottoman before he moved closer resting his head on my back to press his ear to my skin “nice and slow for me. Just breathe with me In. And out. In and back out” he said and I did my best to breath with him even if I ended up coughing and wheezing as he walked me through a few long breaths “how long have you been like this?” He asked as he pulled back moving so I could see his face letting go of my underdress

“Forever”

“I get the feeling you need to tell me something.” He said

“I'm asthmatic. Have been as long as I can remember.” I answered

“That certainly explains a lot” he said “when did a doctor tell you?”

“I was nine.”

“I take it your mother was too?”

“Yes.”

“Okay, how are you managing it? What do you have to take when you get like this?” He asked

“The box on my bedside table” I told him still struggling he got up and went to the box seeming confused

“What are these?”

“Asthma cigarettes. Prof prescribed them” I answered

“You smoke!’ he argued

“On doctors instructions yes.” I answered

“Are you mad!”

“There not tobacco there thorn apple leaves there meant to help” I said

He sighed begrudgingly bringing one over so I took it and lit it on a candle sitting for a few moments slowly inhaling it all

He brushed the smoke away from his face a moment before rather angrily speaking “he's mad.”

“It helps.”

“So would you sitting not moving for the ten minutes it took you to smoke that” he argued “but that dress wasn't helping in the slightest why on earth did they lace you in that corset so much?”

“It's the style apparently. Plus I needed to”

“Why?”

“...father buys all my dresses two sizes smaller then I am. I have to double lace the corset for a hope of even getting in them

“Why would he do that?”

“He means well. He thinks if he buys all my clothes too small it's… encouraging”

“Encouraging? I hate to ask but when did you last eat anything?”

“...four days ago.”

“Okay, that is also not going to be helping.” He said

“Yeah well you try fitting into a dress with a twenty one inch waist” I pouted

“I think he's trying to kill you.” He joked “you feel a bit better now?”

“Yes. Thank you jack”

“You're welcome. How often do you get attacks like that?”

“once a week or so.”

“Does your father know?”

“Somewhat. I don't always tell him the whole truth”

“Would you be against coming to the hospital?”

“What?”

“I am not confident about leaving you alone tonight. If you agree I'll talk to your father take you to the hospital I'll keep you under observation myself.”

“Why?”

“.... I fear this may be worse then just a simple attack y/n”

“I don't want to worry my father. he's fearful enough as it is”

“Then which would you rather? He be a little worried a stressed as you spend the night in hospital in my care or he comes in here and finds you dead in your bed tomorrow morning because I'm pretty sure which one will upset him more.”

“One night?”

“One night. Under observation.”

“Alright jack”

“Thank you y/n” he smiled giving my hand a kiss “just rest i'll go see your father” he said as he got up and headed out of my room.

Eventually he arrived with my father in tow and the two discussed as my maid packed me some items and my father called us a carriage, I changed into my loosest dress doing my best not to show my father my struggles

“Perhaps Dr sneed would be better he is my doctor he's taken such food care of me” he began

“Dr sneed is very busy he won't have time and what she needs is observations now I have the time to do so”

“Keep me posted won't you?”

“I promise.”

“You'll take care of her doctor?”

“Absolutely, I promise she'll be back right as rain”

“Alright, I'll see you soon sweetheart” he smiled kissing my head before he slowly and tenderly let my hand go giving it to jack, he smiled to me squeezing my hand and leading me slowly to the carriage luckily the party never even noticed but as i sat down my father pulled jack close to him. “Anything happens to her. It's your head.”

“Yes sir” he nodded before climbing into the carriage with me.

[doctorbunny]

(Part 6) MILGRAM x AVOIT bluetooth earphones collab: Mikoto and Kotoko voice lines

[Brief context: On 28th December 2023 a crossover was announced for bluetooth earphones featuring original voicelines from MILGRAM characters. [Website]

PRISON.009 Mikoto Kayano Vertical text = こんなところで何やってんだろ、僕 = What am I doing in a place like this...? [the first line of Mikoto's first voice drama]

Voice Guidance: 電源オーン = Power O~n 電源オーフ＝Power O~ff 接続成功、やったね = Connection successful, woohoo! [he cheers 'yatta ne' same as Yuno did, which is a celebratory cheer, so you can imagine him saying 'yippee' here too if you'd prefer ww] 接続解除 = Connection terminated ペアリングしてるからちょっと待ってね = It's Pairing so just wait a bit, ok? ペアリング成功 = Pairing successful あれ、ペアリング失敗しちゃった = Eh- The pairing didn't work at all そろそろ充電したほうがいいんじゃない? = Shouldn't you put it on charge soon? ノイズキャンセリングオ〜ン = Noise Cancelling O~n アンビエントマイクをオンするよ = Ambient mic turned on, y'know ノーマルモードだよ = It's on Normal Mode

Random Voice: ヒトゴロシとか言われても、知らないよ･･････ = Even if they're saying I'm like a murderer or something, I don't know anything about it おつかれー。たまにはおやすみしなよ~ = I'm exhausted-. It's pretty rare that I get a good rest~ そういう音楽聴くんだ。センスいいね = The kind of music you listen to. You've got good taste マッピー、恋バナしよ、恋バナ = Mappi-, lets chat about love, girl talk! [the word Mikoto uses here is 'koi bana' which was also the name of minigram 45, it literally means a kind of light, gossipy chat about love, but officially got TL'd as 'girl talk' so I used both terms to fit it into English better] ゆんちゃん。最近JKの間では何がアツいの? = Yun-chan. What's the latest hotness amongst the JKs? [JK is a slang term short for 女子高生/joshi kousei/female high school students, closest English slang I could think of was Girliepop but it's not quite the same. Basically he's just asking her what's currently popular with teenage girls. Mikoto also filled out his interrogation questions like it was a social media bio so he's just Like This sometimes www] フータさー。そんなんじゃモテないよ? = C'mon Fuuta-. Isn't that kind of stuff cringe? [the word Mikoto uses here is motenai, which is unpopular/avoided/unwelcome, often in the sense of 'that guy is unpopular with women', its a slang term, so I extrapolated to find an English one I felt fit] 僕を守るためなら、俺はなんだってするぜ = If its for the sake of protecting Mikoto, I'll do whatever it takes! [This is John speaking, we know because he uses 'ore', in the first half he refers to Mikoto as 'boku', which is the first person pronoun Mikoto uses] ああああー! 俺をいらつかせんなぁー!! = Arghhh-! Don't piss me off- !! [John again]

PRISON.010 Kotoko Yuzuriha Vertical text = 粛清完了。当然の報いだ = Purge Complete. It's [their] just desserts. [from the second trial teaser trailer]

Voice Guidance: 電源オン = Power On 電源オフ＝Power Off 接続成功 = Connection Successful 接続解除 = Connection Terminated ペアリング中 = Pairing [on going] ペアリング成功 = Pairing Successful ちっ、ペアリング失敗 = Tsk, Pairing failed ちょっと、バッテリーないんだけど = Hey, there's no battery left ノイズキャンセリング = Noise Cancelling アンビエントマイク、オン = Ambient Mic, On ノーマルモード = Normal Mode

Random Voice: いいわ。わかる人間にはわかるから = It's alright. Because people who understand will understand エス、私はあなたの牙になろう = Es, I will become your fang 音楽で精神集中? いいね = Using music to hone your mind? Nice フータ、少しは本気で生きたら? = Fuuta, why not try living at least a little seriously? [Once more from the top- "Thank you @maristelina!"] カヤノミコト、次は仕留める = Kayano Mikoto, I'll kill you next クスノキムウ、実害がない間は見逃してやる = Kusunoki Muu, as long as there's no real harm done, I'll overlook it for that time [Maristellina also helped here. The way Kotoko says she'll overlook Muu also suggests she views Muu as of a lower status than herself ] 私が看守ならよかったのに = I think it'd be great if I was the guard さぁ、私の罪を聴くがいい = Well then, you should listen to my sins

This is PART SIX of 6 Jackalope and Es, Haruka and Yuno, Fuuta and Muu, Shidou and Mahiru, Kazui and Amane, Mikoto and Kotoko [You are here]

[daftpatience]

Do you have any tips or advice for running an artists booth at a convention? I'm thinking about doing it eventually and been wanting to hear from people who have done it before :^)

yeah!!! lemme rattle off a few things off the top a my head also, pardon me 4 using amazon dot ca links for products that i mention. its just easy to find references that way (and often u can look up the brand and find their non-amazon store etc etc)

this got super long so im putting it under a cut!!

• join an artist alley group!! i'm in this artist alley discord and it is a fantastic place to get info about cons, table display ideas, manufacturer recommendations, etc. there are more than just this group out there and i think there are bigger ones but i personally really like this one ^u^ i make a ton of use of the display resources and manu recommendation channels!

• if you can afford it, be choosy about the events you apply to. there are a lot of cons out there that are fantastic, and a lot that aren't worth the trouble, and i don't necessarily mean small vs big cons. some of my fav events are smaller artist alleys local to me, and most of the artists i know avoid informa (fanexpo) like the plague. check out what other artists have to say about past events and keep an eye out for red flags: personally i find cons with really out of date/poorly advertised social medias and websites that have mismatched info are a warning sign of a mismanaged and not well attended event. • you don't need a lot of fancy display stuff to start, those sorts of things you can build up over time. im a fan of getting a ton of my display stuff from the dollar store >:)

when you're ready and need the space to display a good amount of art the main thing you wanna pick up is definitely something that gives your table some verticality, whether that's a pvc pipe style setup, pegboards, or modular cube shelving (we all used to use these big heavy grid ones until the plastic sheet covered ones came out and now we all use those. theyre cuter and lighter and fit better on a table and come in more colours yayay. im sure some people still like the grid ones since they fit gridwall accessories tho) there are lots of other ways to display stuff but these r what i am most familiar with. definitely helps to look at youtube and pinterest and discord groups for display ideas!!

another thing you will want to start is a tablecloth. not every con has their tables already covered! there are those plastic picnic ones at dollar stores, and you can thrift bedsheets/fabric too.

• depending on the type of display and art you do you'll need some way to attach signs/prints/charms/etc to your display. i just moved from blu-tack to magnets but i used to use sewing clips (back when i used the grid cubes) and before then masking tape. all of them are okay and cool! except blu-tack. don't make the same mistakes as me it adds like 40 whole minutes to teardown and it leaves gross oil on the prints after some time. evil

• if you don't have business cards you can make a sign with a qr code that links to you/your shop! there are lots of qr code makers online that u can even customize with images and colours and stuff. there will be people that wanna know how to find you again after a con!

• these days a lot of people don't bring cash to conventions and it's pretty vital to bring some sort of card reader or other digital payment method. most of us use square - they recently made it so that the phone app can accept tap! so you don't need to jump for the expensive physical readers. i've also got a paypal dot me qr code and my etransfer email (i think this is a canadian thing) on a lil sign on the table so people have lots of payment options. usually over 50% of my con income comes from non-cash sales!

• make sure to bring change!! we've forgotten in the past and done okay but it's always handy to be able to make change for people. you'll want a secure place to put cash as well, whether it's a locked moneybox that you keep out of sight or a place on your person (friend of mine uses a fanny pack!) you never wanna leave your table completely unattended but especially when it comes to the moneybox. if it's a multi day con this is an item you mustn't leave at your table overnight.

• keep count of your sales and expenses properly so that you can see how much you made at the end of the con. i really like spreadsheets but you can even just note it down in a book. here's a little example of one con for me:

• you'll want to make a checklist of stock and display stuff to bring, but don't forget to make a list of minor stuff like phone chargers and scissors and tape and glue and pens and paper. multiple types of tape and paper if possible. they don't feel super important until you're stuck because you forgot to make a price sign and have to get by with a sharpie and a napkin. don't let that be you!! dollar store sticky note pads are super useful for this type of thing.

• plan out your prices and do as much prep (counting, sign making, display planning, packing/sorting) as you can beforehand so that the event doesn't feel too stressful. make sure your merchandise is stored in an easily accessible way for you behind the table so you aren't scrambling or rummaging too much when people are asking for stuff!

• similarly, whatever you can leave out for people to just pick/grab themselves, the more of it you're likely to sell. things like stickers and charms are good for this - people like to touch stuff! and it makes it so you don't need to go fishing for items for people as frequently. generally i don't do this with more expensive items just to be safe.

• if you sell prints, people are gonna ask for sleeves to keep them safe, especially at outdoor events. sometimes people ask for sleeves/bags even if they dont buy anything. they're a good idea to have on hand and you can find em for pretty cheap online and for a bit more expensive at dollar stores (i use OPP bags. if you dont wanna use plastic you can always get paper bags/envelopes/glassine bags instead)

• a cushion for the chair is a good idea. lots of conventions have really uncomfy chairs. some folks even bring camping chairs instead!

• pack snacks/lunch/water/drinks/have lunch plans. if you have a table buddy that is able to run out for food that's always nice. you might be sitting but it uses a lot of energy to interface all day!! you'll be exhausted and hungry and it's gonna be important to get enough fuel for your brain to function properly. i genuinely would recommend juice/soda/coffee/energy dink alongside water and food if you wanna live, especially if its a multi day con. get good sleep on days between!

• if you're excited to do trades with other artists during the con, the general etiquette is to wait until later in the day/near the end when the crowds are winding down! it's always okay to ask if someone's doing trades, and don't be upset or press them if they aren't interested or have certain stuff they don't want to trade.

• speaking of con etiquette, depending on the type of vert you are (intro/extro) and or how much customer service experience you have, interfacing can be nervewracking. my general rule is that if they stop to look, i say Hello and let them browse. if they seem interested in my table i try and do some small talk. stuff like How are you/How's the event been for ya/compliments on their outfit/cosplay/merch they have on like pins etc are good! kids and old folks love this. as tiring as it is to do some of my favourite parts of cons is talking to nice people that like my art!! all the folks that say nice things about my work are what keep me drawing ;w; i keep my sketchbook with me to jot down/doodle nice and funny encounters just cus it makes me happy to look back on XD

• when it's teardown time try to put stuff away as neatly as you can. you might be tired and just wanna toss all your stuff into whatever it is you brought it in but i promise future you (especially next-con you) will be so thankful that you put all your price signs into one baggie etc etc.

• speaking of bringing and putting away merch - you'll need a way to get it all from your home/car to your table and back. lots of people use dollies and other types of utility cart (i can guarantee there are a bunch of those grandma grocery ones at your local thrift store!!) - i personally use a big luggage bag and a collapsible wagon, but back in the day we used to CARRY bin after bin of stuff from the car and back in multiple trips which i would NOT reccomend lol. not every convention hall is easily accessible or close to parking so not having to lift stuff if you can avoid it is gonna be vital.

[beesmygod]

i think another issue with webcomics having any scene or being taken seriously at all is that its a lot of stale air, everybody got captured by ig/twitter/tumblr and subsequently become trapped in the trappings and style of those websites. all discussion is couched in the boring 'fandom' subculture on websites with pre-built in infinite scroll and shit search, so updates to their comics or body of work are just as ephemeral as posts that are basically 'lol i farted on my dog' and any criticism is 'just being mean' or 'dogpiling on a poor artist'. not to mention any discoverability of anything new is basically going down the twitter/instagram likes of 'known quantities' for your own comic taste because of how atrophied any discussion around the medium has become

I dont see any way to escape this beyond social media dying a brutal and unprofitable death

trying to argue against the webtoons/IG model was entirely pointless the few times i tried, but its a topic that's hard for me to not devolve into frustrated sputtering about. it's so obviously antithetical to the purpose of making art, enjoying things, creation, joy, goodness, etc. and i would, frankly completely irrationally, be framed as someone who had it out for vertical strips. a sentiment which makes no sense unless you assume im the biggest moron and dipshit in the world. im sure arguing against someone is easier when the position you saddle them with is a seriously stupid one.

the inevitable downward spiral of these platforms feels entirely predictable. any model that revolves around quantity over quality is an obviously flawed one in most circumstances but when applied to art its completely absurd. the ideal artist for these websites are people who have no interest in contributing to a vaster landscape of complex works and instead are hyper-focused on being part of a large scale skinner box experiment for adults with compulsive spending issues. the artists themselves have severe numbers poisoning.

these are purely ephemeral and unremarkable comics that are rarely ever seen outside of instagram for their lack of any exceptional or worthwhile unique elements worth passing around. they are created with a factory mindset; crank them out as quickly as possible and flood various websites with the comic equivalent of grey goo in order to amass the maximum number of clicks. their ideal audience is undiscerning and simply looking for stimuli that will not challenge them on any level. logically it follows that is work is explicitly for the largest possible audience one can acquire: the lowest common denominator. they are making work for a computer or an advertiser to enjoy. human enjoyment is secondary.

the unironic and sincere discussion of views and followers as if the numbers have ever been real was surreal. everyone was around for when facebook revealed that it had been grossly inflating its video metrics after strong-arming everyone into moving to video, causing the destruction of several indie companies and websites. you would have to be straight up delusional to think the webtoons numbers are real. like, it is genuinely hard for me to be nice about people who bark bark bark about "its where the audience is!!!!" when the worst comic you've ever read with 2 updates has 12876492375238576 views, 0 patreon followers and 8909 comments. the obviously AI generated comments by accounts with no profiles (as in, you can't click on profiles at all to confirm its even a real person commenting) are beyond the pale lol. its some emperors new clothes shit, if the emperor made his own invisible clothes and cried about how hard they toiled for nothing. and also they were emperor of synecdoche, new york

how does a reasonable adult look at this and conclude its real? isn't it an obvious fiction? its because it's mean to point out otherwise, and being mean is the worst thing you can be.

people used to bitch about how the "had to" made reels and i felt like i was going insane. superstitious nonsense about "the algorithm" spread and has incited people to tortuously warp their work to fit with advertising standards they don't see a penny of, in the hopes of finding an audience that doesn't exist. when the algorithm changes to better suit advertiser needs, they are somehow blindsided and betrayed by this, as if it has not been the M.O. of social media websites for the past 20 years. they will do it again. and again. and again. as advertising becomes less and less financially viable and more and more intrusive, public opinion is going to turn hard on the people who tied themselves to these ships.

call me a rat for fleeing, but i can't bear to entertain this stuff anymore. it's embarrassing, the idea of sacrifice in the name of a greater good (sacrifice being uhhhhh not using fail platforms lol) should not be such a shocking and radical act. it should be reflexive

[autumn816]

fake dating + pregnancy fic👀

Hehe, here you go. Hope you like it😁

The double vertical lines glare at him.

The results are positive. They are positive. He is pregnant. He can’t be pregnant. There could be a chance that the results are wrong, right? They aren’t always true. But what are the chances that all five of the tests are wrong?

He’s pregnant. He’s pregnant. He’s pregnant.

Knock. Knock.

“George?” Lewis’ voice filters in from the other side of the door. “Can I come in?”

“Yeah,” George croaks, “it’s open.”

Lewis slips in the bathroom. He takes in George sitting on top of the toilet, lid down. Four pregnancy sticks laid on the sink and one in George’s hands. It doesn’t take an intellectual to figure out what it says but Lewis asks anyway.

“Is it—”

“Yeah.”

“All five of them?”

“Yeah.”

“Oh.”

This wasn’t supposed to happen, George thinks. Him and Lewis were two weeks away from staging a fake break-up. They had a whole plan for it. They had come up with that plan together with their teams.

After some fucking media released pictures of George and Lewis from a private event, they had pretended to be dating. Telling the fans they were just fuck buddies wasn’t even an option. So with Mercedes and Ferrari, George and Lewis had agreed they’ll pretend to date for a few months and then break-up. It was all going so smoothly until the night Lewis dropped him home after having dinner with the older man’s family. They had gone long enough without sleeping together when they started fake dating. That night was all it took for them to break their unspoken agreement.

So really this is on them more than anyone or anything (except maybe the condom they used. It clearly didn’t serve its purpose). They shouldn’t have slept together that night.

Cold hands flatten on his stomach.

“Crikey!” George hisses, breaking out of his daze. “What’re you doing? And why are your hands so cold?”

Somewhere during his daze, Lewis had come closer to George. Because Lewis is crouching down between his legs, rubbing circles on his skin. His eyes are on the same level as his stomach. “You’re pregnant.”

“Yes, now stop it.” George tries to pull Lewis’ hands away but the older man stays persistent. “Lewis, you aren’t going to feel anything yet. I, on the other hand, am feeling your cold hands. So please take them off.”

“Sorry.” Lewis doesn’t sound sorry at all and takes his hands away very slowly. His gaze stays fixated, nonetheless. “There is a baby in there.”

George snorts. “Yes, thank you for letting me know.”

Lewis looks at George.

“Sorry.” George is the one apologising this time. “I know we are both in shock right now.”

“Shock is a fucking understatement.”

Silence befalls over them for two minutes until George speaks. “We’re supposed to fake a break-up in two weeks.”

“I mean, we still could.” Lewis shrugs his shoulders. “Exes co-parent all the time.”

George rolls his lower lip between his teeth, gnawing at it.

Lewis tugs George’s lip out, swiping his thumb over the flesh. “But, I don’t think we should. I think it would be easier if we’re still—if we still pretend to be together.”

“You still want to do that?”

“Whatever we do,” Lewis says, cupping George’s cheek, “we do it together. You won’t be alone, love.”

George’s breathing slows. He knew Lewis wouldn’t just run away but hearing it is different. It felt good. It calmed him down, no matter how little.

Lewis presses a fleeting kiss on George’ stomach, making the man jump, and stands up. “Come on.”

George places his hand into Lewis’ extended one so Lewis could pull him up. “Where?”

“We can talk about the rest and what to do later. Right now, we’re going back to sleep.”

George opens his mouth to protest.

“We can’t do anything until our minds are clear. The edges of Lewis’ mouth curve upwards. “We have to take baby steps.”

George stares at Lewis.

“Too soon?”

“It hasn’t even been half an hour yet.”

——————

I was originally gonna do gewis fake dating because George is pregnant. So gewis are sleeping together and George falls pregnant. So to avoid backlash and people talking bad about George, him and Lewis decide to tell the others that they are together. But then I remembered one of my wips so this is basically a fic divergence, if you will. I was like what if gewis are already fake dating and George ends up pregnant during that🤔It was a different take to the prompt and I already liked it so I went with it.

—

Mash-up trope

[mariacallous]

The end of TikTok has begun. As the dust settles from a week of shockingly fast legislative action by the US Congress, it’s clear that TikTok next year will look much different from the TikTok we’re using today.

When President Joe Biden signed a $95 billion dollar foreign aid package on Wednesday, it brought to life a nightmare that has haunted TikTok for more than four years. If TikTok’s Chinese owner, ByteDance, refuses to divest its stakes in the company, the United States will ban the app nationwide. The signing started the clock, giving TikTok 270 days to find a new owner. (As The Washington Post’s Cristiano Lima-Strong noted, TikTok’s time will run out the day before Inauguration Day 2025.)

There are a few ways this could all shake out. An American company or private equity fund could buy TikTok and its powerful recommendation algorithm. Or, a buyer might have to accept just the bones of the platform without that algorithmic muscle; The Information reported on Thursday that ByteDance has already started gaming out what a sale without the algorithm would look like. Or, perhaps no buyer can be found and TikTok goes poof.

Unless TikTok or a horde of its users were to somehow win a lawsuit challenging the law signed this week—a lawsuit the company has already said it plans to file—all the potential outcomes lead to an app that is dramatically different.

If a US tech company were to, miraculously, buy out the app and algorithm from ByteDance, it’ll likely integrate the app into its own products and services. But I doubt we’ll ever see a “TikTok by Meta.” Meta and other tech giants have come under intense antitrust scrutiny in recent years. If any company with a big social platform were to gobble up one of its top competitors, that would set off alarms at the Department of Justice or Federal Trade Commission.

Microsoft has suggested that it has an interest in buying TikTok, and it might be one of the app’s only viable choices for a buyer. Microsoft’s biggest subsidiary otherwise is, well, LinkedIn—and can we even call LinkedIn a TikTok rival with a straight face?

Separately, if, say, a private equity firm like Blackstone were to purchase TikTok without its much-envied algorithm, rebuilding the heart of the app could be difficult. A company without a deep bench of algorithmic wizards on hand likely wouldn’t have the expertise to quickly reengineer a feed-based social media platform from scratch. If they tried, I doubt the results would be pretty.

And if there’s no new owner? Well, I guess we’re left with YouTube Shorts and Instagram Reels. TikTok’s popularity in the US forced Google and Meta to invest in vertical video, but those platforms mostly cater to the younger “Skibidi Toilet” generation. They wouldn’t easily fill a TikTok-shaped gap on the US internet.

Still, the law passed this week may not stand for much longer. In a statement calling it unconstitutional, TikTok seemed confident that the law could be overturned. “We believe the facts and the law are clearly on our side, and we will ultimately prevail,” a TikTok spokesperson said on Wednesday. The company used a similar argument last year to win an injunction blocking a ban passed in Montana.

Regardless of how this lawsuit plays out, TikTok will be different. The question is just what kind of “different” that will be.

[kharchung]

Theyre trying to make tumblr into fucking tiktok. i just realized. fuck this site. I hate tumblr so fucking much what the fuck why can you swipe vertically to get random posts. i literally want to exit the photo. the exit the foto gesture is supposed to be swipe up. how to i send death threats to the tumblr staff? i hate them so much and i want them to perish and stop existing. Why does every social media want to be tiktok i hate tiktok to fucking much. Why is it not enough for them to be a profitable social media site? why does everything have to be the most fucking profitable thing ever. I hate optimization. An endless seeking of the best most advanced things will only.lead to sadness. Be happy with what you fucking have you pieces of shit. All corporations are shit and i hate them. If i ever see anyone with tumblr merch on here, im blocking them. If i see anyone irl with it, im bullying them. Have you seen tumblr live? It's literally all horny streamers. They just want all the obscenely horny socially disconnected vulnerable people to spend their money on this shit. I hate this site as a platform so fucking much. It it really too much to ask for to not use tiktok? Youtube has tiktok. Instagram has tiktok. Snapchat has tiktok. Im sure every other fucking social media that i dont use has tiktok. GOOGLE CHROME HAS FUCKING TIKTOK. STOP. DO YOU THINK PEOPLE USE YOUR FUCKING WEBSITE BECAUSE ITS TIKTOK??????? FUCK YOU.

[canmom]

last season's anime: that elf show (1-6)

Belatedly watching Sousou no Frieren, the darling of the... previous anime season four months ago. So old news as far as most are concerned!

I have held off on watching this one because, well, videogamey elves-and-dwarves European fantasy is ehhhhhh! I can get into it if it's really well done and puts the focus somewhere interesting (c.f. Dungeon Meshi), or if its medievalism is a bit more historically grounded than your average videogame-inflected fantasy anime (actual European history is full of fascinating/fucked up shit which rarely makes it into fantasy). But Frieren didn't strike me as having that vibe.

Nevertheless I heard Madhouse were the ones that did it and somehow that was enough to finally tip me over into watching it. So lol. I was a baby or even an ovum when Madhouse were doing most of their best known work, and yet...

Anyway, it turns out, not only was it a Madhouse project, but none other than Yoshiaki Kawajiri actually boarded a good few of the episodes, although he's not the enshutsu [episode director/storyboarder] whose people are most excited about. The series director's last work was Bocchi the Rock after all! And this sure is another hit.

The first two things that jumped out at me in the first episodes were: the bgs are insanely good looking and the photography department is absolutely in love with a digital bokeh filter. I don't think I often see this specific kind of blur filter in anime (though I think you'll see it the works of some directors who like to emulate realistic photography like Yamada or Shinkai), and it was interesting the effect it had of eliding the lines and creating an effect kind of similar to posterisation.

Bokeh aside, the background painting and layouts in this anime are really incredibly good. When I occasionally watch fantasy anime - I have a friend who is quite into isekai and will occasionally show me one of her faves such as Ascendance of a Bookworm - one thing that often bothers me is the architecture, you have identical box-shaped houses with big windows, wide flat streets, it generally doesn't feel like a lived-in city. This is something that particularly bothers me about Attack on Titan.

By contrast, Frieren is routinely dropping scenes like this:

Split levels, varied colours and heights, accurate depiction of features like jettying, mixing up the verticals a bit. It's an impressive attention to detail and it does so much to sell the setting.

And the nature scenes are outstanding as well. Although I'm pretty sure they're painted digitally, it has the feeling of older physical media. The bg painters clearly understand the power of hinting at form with brush stroke shapes and a few flat colours - a technique similar to the bg paintings at Ghibli. There's rarely an obvious digital texture and they exercise restraint in overwhelming everything with glows and flares. The flat colours and paint-like textures are allowed to shine on their own. Plus everything has a subtle grain (pretty sure it's just good old Perlin noise), adding to the analogue feel.

But yeah, look at the subtle atmospheric perspective in the last one there! The layers of forest in the background are painted with less saturated colours, creating a powerful sense of layering and distance, without having to draw more trees than the immediate foreground. I could learn a lot from this painting alone when it comes to forest scenes.

While I'm going on about technical stuff, the animation also stands up. The first episode in particular has some real flexes with crowd scenes containing dozens of moving characters. The character animation is generally very restrained, but naturalistic. There is constantly a strong sense of space. The action animation later does less for me - it's not at all bad, but it's within the conventions of modern shounen adaptations - but it's generally speaking strong.

All that said, what about what it's actually, y'know, about?

Frieren wastes little time in establishing its premise. The title character is a nigh-immortal elf, who was part of the RPG party that defeated the demon lord just prior to the outset of the show. Frieren has a pretty flat affect in general - not to say she's emotionless, far from it, but rather the heavy lifting of what she's feeling has to be conveyed through cinematography and implication of her actions. Though that said, it does plenty to humanise (elfise?) her too - she is not a morning person, and there are moments where she will get visibly excited about small things. Mostly, Frieren is a character who really doesn't understand herself very well.

Comparisons to the prototypical emotionaless girl Rei Ayanami come to mind to me - especially the version of Rei we encounter in Eva 3.0+1.0. Both characters' affect is shaped by transience - for Rei, she's a short-lived clone, for Frieren, her perception of time is completely miscalibrated to all the people around her so she'll accidentally disappear for decades while they get old and die. And both characters' arcs involve learning about how to understand human connections.

As kvin has said in his impressively detailed article on the background to this show, this premise is used to tell a story about the passage of time. In the specific, it's about the grief of realising you did not spend enough time with someone after they've gone. Frieren is retracing the steps of the party after disappearing from their lives for nigh on 50 years, returning just in time to catch the human characters as they die of old age. The episodes are usually constructed around her memory of that adventure, paralelled by the connection she's forming in the present with her new apprentice. She's trying to do things that she never managed to do when they were alive, get in touch with her own feelings, etc. etc. Lots of mono no aware in the air.

So each episode tends to develop two stories in parallel. There will be the immediate impetus - Frieren and co. find something that needs dealing with and coincidentally links back in to the past - and also flashbacks which help flesh out the rest of Frieren's party and why the journey was such a big deal to her. The writing and editing generally does a very good job of knowing what to leave unstated, what can be implied by a cut and a closeup.

More than anything I think I'm reminded of Seirei no Moribito. Frieren herself reminds me a little of Balsa - they're quite different characters, but the way they relate to others and the general arc of being changed by their connections - and while the dynamic between her and Fern is a little less parental than Balsa and Chagum, the use of scenery and the general approach to setting up of episode plots feels quite similar.

Predictably, stories about grief touch a nerve! 'I didn't properly appreciate the time I had with her' is something I feel particularly with my friend Fall, who we lost nearly two years ago now. A story about figuring out just what someone meant to you after they are gone is resonant, shall we say.

The first and second episodes as a pair end up particularly affecting. I talked about the technical stuff above, but the editing is also really strong. A couple of moments that stood out to me: moment of ephiphany communicated with a sudden eye closeup, an L-cut to bells which you don't hear until there's been another cut to the actual funeral. Since I've been in the sakugabooru server I've been learning to pay a lot more attention to individual enshutsu, so the names to credit in this case are Saito himself for the first, and Tomoya Kitagawa for the second.

The third episode (Daiki Harashina) stumbles a bit in my view, not so much because of the direction but because the script brings in some less-interesting magic mechanics and fighting-a-demon elements. The fourth episode, the first directed by Kawajiri, falls back into the rhythm: the stakes are small but we feel the development of Frieren and Fern's dynamic.

The fifth (Kenichi Shimizu) and sixth (Toru Iwasawa) episodes are a two part story, introducing a new character Stark as a second young apprentice character - the sixth episode has a really exceptional action scene with its dragon fight, bringing in a lot of familiar action animator names, and moreover the preceding episode does the work to set it up so we're invested in the culmination of the character arc it represents! Also there's that one sitting down cut I heard about. I wasn't sure I'd be on board with Stark at first, but he's growing on me through his interactions.

By this point we're starting to have more present-day 'villagers have a monster problem' type setups, but they're still primarily instruments to advance characterisation: the conflict of Stark with cowardice and responsibility is paralelled by one of Frieren's former party members, Frieren and Fern get to face ghosts of people they've lost, etc.

The first few episodes jump forward in years at a time in between, and even within the episodes tend to elide huge periods of time with montages - very effective for driving the central theme of tiiiiime. That seems to be slowing down a little now, although we'll see.

I think if anything weakens it, it's that the demons and monsters feel undercooked as setting elements - and I'm a little worried by hearing that they become increasingly central elements as the show goes on. Of course, they're kinda mandated by the RPG setting, and being able to just say 'back when demons attacked the village' lets the show put its time into characterisation. But to take episode 3 for example - surely there is drama to be had in the idea of a senior underling who was frozen for nigh eighty years, unaware that his master had been overthrown? But nah, he just attacks immediately, and then it turns out that human magic science has advanced so much building out from his technique that he's not a big deal anymore (ratfic ass concept). Mostly demons and monsters exist as plot devices, opportunities for characters to prove themselves or experience an epiphany.

It's a shame because the show goes to such enormous lengths to flesh out everyone else's motivations. 'Why did character x do or feel y' is kind of the thrust of every episode (c.f. that kinda questionable stuff people say about JP storytelling being more about causality than conflict). Next time they supply us a demon character, I hope they're willing to give them a comparable treatment. 'Kind, peace-loving villagers vs ontologically evil baddies' is just such a boring dynamic, and with such love poured into everything else, it seems a shame.

Overall, I don't think Frieren is going to displace Tengoku Daimakyou as my fave of 2023, or stand alongside Dungeon Meshi as elves-and-dwarves fantasy goes, but it's definitely a memorable one. As an adaptation it's absurdly strong. Looking forward to watching the rest.

[uvexar]

Dragon Discourse is back to 5e social media and I've realized that dragons form a really fascinating vertical slice of all the problems with the system. Not just technical problems, but problems in the culture of the game.

Dragons in 5e D&D are big sacks of hit points with deadly breath weapons. Large dragons have a Frightful Presence, which is like a fight-or-flight response effect triggered on everyone close enough to it. The largest get to slap people with their wings and knock them over with their tails. The most powerful dragons have Legendary Actions, giving them extra attacks on other people's turns, and if you fight them in their lair, their lair has effects too. A burst of fire might come out of a crack in a red dragon's cave, for instance.

It's not a bad setup. But the problem comes when dragons have to intersect with the rest of the game.

If you play a dragon like an intelligent creature (which you should - "intelligence" meaning not totally brain-dead), its abilities suggest a monster that outside of its lair will *never* let go of its areal advantage. It will fly down, use its fire breath on the player characters, then fly away until it recharges. This wouldn't be bad, except that 5e as a system encourages characters builds around specific aspects of combat. In this situation, melee-only characters are going to have to suck it up and use a bow, which they wouldn't be as optimized for, but which would still be effective.

But 5e as a culture? HATES this kind of scenario. You might be wondering, why is a tabletop game encouraging closing off an entire area of combat for the sake of optimization? The answer is, it isn't; however, the culture of 5e suggests that when a character specializes in something, they should be expected to be doing that thing *all the time* and *nothing else.* Players will get upset if they encounter a monster that hard-counters their focused character build!

This isn't necessarily their fault, of course. 5e is incredibly glued to the 2D grid/battlemap, only surpassed by 4e in that respect. Its range increments in all areas (weapons, spell areas, movement speeds) are set up for a space no wider than 150 feet or so across, and that's honestly being generous. And because streaming is absolutely enamored with rich territory maps and VTTs, and streaming is a cornerstone of 5e as a product, very few players have any reason to expect a battle with a vertical component larger than 30 feet. (Anything larger is increasingly abstract and hard to render on a grid map.) As a result, players are able to comfortably design builds that are "melee-only."

Dragons break the whole paradigm of 2D, VTT-focused combat in half. So what happens when you play a dragon intelligently in 5e? Simple: Players get frustrated, and characters die.

An analogy here that I think is appropriate is, imagine if enemies just inside your load range in Skyrim could spray fire at you with a 20% chance of nearly killing you. That wouldn't be fun! 5e doesn't have a literal load range, of course, but *effectively* it does.

There are three ways you can run a dragon in 5e. The first is to give it a death wish. Make it land like a Skyrim dragon at half health, or hell just treat it like a big dinosaur that can do some long jumps. What you're left with is a bag of hit points with no brain that can't fly. And that's a pretty easy fight - worse, it's *boring.*

The second way is to homebrew the shit out of it. 4e has this over 5e in terms of dragons: they escape the trap of the grid's event horizon by having a lot of cool abilities they can use. You can add a bunch of these cool abilities to a dragon in 5e, and it almost makes it a good fight! Except now you're fixing an issue with the game on your own time, in ways that are explicitly counter to the game's actual monster design paradigms. You are stapling 4e onto 5e. Which is fine until the contradictions become overwhelming.

The third way, of course, is to play it intelligently. How are players expected to respond to a real life dragon?

In myth and legend, heroes never meet dragons on even turf. Even Saint George, the classic knight on a lance facing down a fiery serpent, actually pacifies the dragon with the Cross in the story. So if a group of PCs wants to kill a dragon, they have to use every tool at their disposal. Find allies, place traps, seek it out in its lair where it has nowhere else to run, and keep it from getting airborne.

This is proactive play. And this is where the last and biggest issue with 5e comes in: *5e actively discourages proactive play.*

This is a problem both cultural and mechanical. Mechanically, 5e's adventure design is extremely reactive and railroad-y, almost scripted in some cases (Descent into Avernus comes to mind). Culturally, the fantasy games most often played by people nowadays are *incredibly* reactive and railroad-y, because that's how video games are programmed! Dragon Age and the Witcher and World of Warcraft and *especially* Skyrim aren't designed for you to be proactive, to build your own goals, or find your own solution to problems.

What this means is that very few players, unless they came up in an older game tradition (or are a horrible revanchist like me), expect the solution to a combat encounter to be found outside of that very combat encounter. And if they have no other choice? It's frustrating! The game isn't giving them the tools to succeed! *They haven't been taught to think this way.*

(This goes for DMs too - the game encourages DMs to design adventures and encounters in a video-game fashion, mechanically and culturally. So of course a dragon in that paradigm, using the 5e rules, is going to suck.)

What's the solution? Well, other than homebrewing (which let's be honest means you should just play 4e), the solution is a hard uphill battle against cultural and mechanical biases. So honestly the easiest way to play a dragon in 5e is to not play it at all.

And that sucks.

[badnew2005]

dennis’ shirt in gets romantic . do you remember hoodiegate. blue and arguably stripey (simply because of how material works) a core emotional dennis motif. but these aren’t bold stripes. it’s The material that makes it seem stripey, all blended together, unending stripes, you can’t tell where one ends and another beings, it’s continuous, but still landscape. you don’t know where he is emotionally, and he doesn’t either. just come back from north dakota. pretending everything’s the same. knowing everything’s different. macs out. and he left. and came back. there are blue stripes.

then THE blue stripe dennis emotional shirt. big and bold. it’s got a different neckline than break up’s shirt but it’s essentially the same pattern. following the narrative of the episode. dennis is out (of the plan)… but he won’t leave. hearing mac set up dee and greg. the wink. confusion and then acceptance. “what do you mean the plan is in motion for me, i thought i was out” setting dennis up with lisa. maybe teddy was a platonic friend from highschool that makes greg jealous. maureen kicking mac out of their apartment after getting married to dennis. “so i’m still your leading man” the big stripes. big emotional arc. calling lisa “my roomie” when he has to flirt with her. drinking wine. helps when your sad. still got big blue stripes. you miss teddy and no one can replace him. macden coming home singing the boys are back in town. maureen couldn’t replace mac. i don’t love you maureen (looks at mac) i never loved you (maureen). blows hitting on lisa purposefully. if he really wanted to sleep with her “sex, banging” he wouldn’t have been that forward, knew it wouldn’t work. big blue stripes. i’m still your leading man. mac thinking that went great. i find you annoying this whole thing is annoying. i’m leaving (to mac’s room). you just have to trust the structure. Just Trust The Structure!!!

third and final dennis shirt. still blue. it’s checkered But the more prominent stripes are facing downward. a Change. the emotional blue stripes are still there but there’s new stripes, going in a different direction. horizontal stripes shown in closeted dennis moments. the macden story and frank and charlie’s stories mirroring eachother - as they once did in fights gay marriage/gets divorced. straight is gay. the stripes have changed. the whole worlds upside down and the emotional dennis stripes have twisted. stops trying to set dennis up with a woman and moving the focus to setting mac up with a man. it won’t play in middle america but we’ll jam it down their throats till they enjoy it. mac coming in and out of the closet like a yoyo. so you’ll help me. i will. emotionally charged macdennis moment. mac let’s go find you some romance. the stripes have changed. this cat is coming out of the wall. to get him out you introduce another cat and they get codependent then that second cat will come out and hopefully the first one will come out soon after. episode before gets romantic was mac finds his pride. Just Trust The Structure. the framing of dennis, with his horizontal and vertical stripes, standing behind mac (hoodiegate). if you just give us a chance, we could tell a love story for the ages (chuckles softly) (dennis is out of frame) a gay…. gay-ass love story. sunnys relationship with its audience and the media. greg i don’t know what you’re talking about … back to dennis. and his stripes. you can barely see the horizontal stripes. they’re mainly vertical. he’s changing. this is a turning point. it was me, it was always me. lisa’s here, focus on dennis. lisa as maureen lisa as mandy. he doesn’t want lisa here. now dennis and his stripes are out of frame again. moving away from the love story, teddy reveal, someone smarter than me could talk about father son relationships here. dennis isn’t over macs shoulder but we still go back to him. you can see the checkered shirt so clearly but the vertical stripes seem even more prominent up close. director glenn. trusting the structure. dennis shots isolated from macs “love story” until the reveal it wasn’t romantic. dennis ready with the speaker. that’s not romantic or comedic. i guess we’re not gonna get that romantic comedy ending after all. mac and dennis’ story mirroring charlie and franks’ Again. the stripes have changed. the cat is coming out of the wall. and i am trusting the structure

[mostlysignssomeportents]

To save the news, shatter ad-tech

I’m coming to the HowTheLightGetsIn festival in HAY-ON-WYE with my novel Red Team Blues:

Sun (May 28), 1130h: The AI Enigma

Mon (May 29), 12h: Danger and Desire at the Frontier

I’m at OXFORD’s Blackwell’s on May 29 at 7:30PM with Tim Harford.

Then it’s Nottingham, Manchester, London, Edinburgh, and Berlin!

Big Tech steals from news, but what it steals isn’t content. Talking about the news isn’t theft, and neither is linking to it, or excerpting it. But stealing money? That’s definitely theft.

Big Tech steals money from the news media. 51% of every ad-dollar is claimed by a tech intermediary, a middleman that squats on a chokepoint between advertisers and publishers. Two companies — Google and Meta — dominate this sector, and both of these companies are “full-stack” — which is cutesy techspeak for “vertical monopoly.”

Here’s what that means: when an advertiser wants to place an ad, it contracts with the “demand-side platform” (DSP) to seek out a chance to put an ad in front of a user based on nonconsensually gathered surveillance data about a potential customer.

The DSP contacts an ad-exchange — a marketplace where advertisers bid against each other to cram their ads into the eyeballs of a user based on surveillance data matches.

The ad-exchange receives a constant stream of chances to place ads. This stream is generated by the “supply-side platform” (SSP), a service that represents publishers who want to sell ads.

Meta/Facebook and Google both the “full stack” of ads: they represent buyers and sellers, and they operate the marketplace. When the sale closes, Googbook collects a commission from the advertiser, another from the publisher, and a fee for running the market. And of course, Google and Facebook are both publishers and advertisers.

This is like a stock exchange where one company operates the exchange, while serving as broker and underwriter for every stock bought or sold, while owning huge amounts of stock in many of the listed companies as well as owning the largest companies on the exchange outright.

It’s like a realtor representing the buyer and the seller, while buying and selling millions of homes for its own purposes, bidding against its buyers and also undercutting its sellers, in an opaque auction that only it can see.

It’s a single lawyer representing both parties in a divorce, while serving as judge in divorce court, while trying to match one of the divorcing parties on Tinder.

It’s incredibly dirty. These companies gobble up the majority of every ad dollar in commissions and other junk fees, and they say it’s because they’re just really danged good at buying and selling ads. Forgive me if I sound cynical, but I think it’s a lot more likely that they’re good at cheating.

We could try to make them stop cheating with a bunch of rules about how a company with this kind of gross conflict of interest should conduct itself. But enforcing those rules would be hard — merely detecting cheating would be hard. A simpler — and more effective — approach is to simply remove the conflict of interest.

Writing on EFF’s Deeplinks blog this week, I explain how the AMERICA Act — introduced by Senator Mike Lee, with bipartisan cosponsors from Elizabeth Warren to Ted Cruz (!) — can do just that:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/05/save-news-we-must-shatter-ad-tech

The AMERICA Act would require the largest ad-tech companies to sell off two of their three ad-tech divisions — they could be a buyer’s agent, a seller’s agent or a marketplace — but not all three (not even two!). This is in keeping with a well-established principle in antitrust law: “structural separation,” the idea that a company can be a platform owner, or a platform user, but not both.

In the heyday of structural separation, railroad companies were banned from running freight companies that competed with the firms that shipped freight on their rails. Likewise, banks were banned from owning companies that competed with the businesses they loaned money to. Basically, the rule said, “If you want to be the ref in this game, you can’t own one of the teams”:

https://www.eff.org/es/deeplinks/2021/02/what-att-breakup-teaches-us-about-big-tech-breakup

Structural separation acknowledges that some conflicts of interest are so consequential and so hard to police that they shouldn’t exist at all. A judge won’t hear a case if they know one of the litigants — and certainly not if they have a financial stake in the outcome of the case.

The ad-tech duopoly controls a massive slice of the ad market, and holds in its hands the destiny of much of the news and other media we enjoy and rely on. Under the AMERICA Act’s structural separation rule, the obvious, glaring conflicts of interest that dominate big ad-tech companies would be abolished.

The AMERICA Act also regulates smaller ad-tech platforms. Companies with $5–20b in turnover would have a duty to “act in the best interests of their customers, including by making the best execution for bids on ads,” and maintain transparent systems that are designed to facilitate third-party auditing. If a single company operated brokerages serving both buyers and sellers, it would need to create firewalls between both sides of the business, and would face stiff penalties for failures to uphold their customers’ interests.

EFF’s endorsement of the AMERICA Act is the first of four proposals we’re laying out in a series on saving news media from Big Tech. We introduced those proposals last week in a big “curtain raiser” post:

https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/04/saving-news-big-tech

Next week, we’ll publish our proposal for using privacy law to kill surveillance ads, replacing them with “context ads” that let publishers — not ad-tech — control the market.

Catch me on tour with Red Team Blues in Hay-on-Wye, Oxford, Manchester, Nottingham, London, and Berlin!

If you’d like an essay-formatted version of this post to read or share, here’s a link to it on pluralistic.net, my surveillance-free, ad-free, tracker-free blog:

https://pluralistic.net/2023/05/25/structural-separation/#america-act

EFF's banner for the save news series; the word 'NEWS' appears in pixelated, gothic script in the style of a newspaper masthead. Beneath it in four entwined circles are logos for breaking up ad-tech, ending surveillance ads, opening app stores, and end-to-end delivery. All the icons except for 'break-up ad-tech' are greyed out.

Image: EFF https://www.eff.org/deeplinks/2023/05/save-news-we-must-shatter-ad-tech

CC BY 3.0 https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en

[chaoticallyfragmentary]

Suna Rintaro

“This is a bad idea,” you say.

“It most certainly is”

“Why are we doing this again?”

“Lost youth? Tendencies towards self-destruction? Poorly managed impulse control?”

You stare, lips parted in awe. All three were probably accurate and then some.

Suna smiles, a mischievous little thing. For a moment, you don’t feel like a set of problems to be solved, financially dependent and saddled with a family with whom conversation floundered and died like rotten fish. Instead, you felt a bit like an idiot which was wonderful. Looking at Suna, leaning against his bike, arms crossed in front of him, midnight breeze ruffling his hair, the neon lights of the club smattering a kaleidoscope of colors across his skin, you say yes, your voice no more than a tiny sputter of breath.

Even when he was young, Suna had been under no illusions about what he was like, spoiled and irritable, downright vindictive when angry, so he’d always thought it was lucky you loved him regardless of it all.

Suna’s fingers always find a place in the curls at the base of your skull, tiny pinpoints of pressure cradling your head as his thumb skims the length of your jaw. He always left you incapable of coherent thought as you witness the outright adoration on his face. He was is the biggest simp.

The first time you let him kiss you, his lips moving against yours, the taste of his tongue in your mouth, the only thing running through your mind was a barrage of chastising thoughts

Why did you wait so long? Why did you fight it?

Holy shit, that was not just a kiss. It was hungry, starving, skidding your ability to overthink to a sharp halt. It was worship. It was devotion and ardor as his mouth wandered along your jaw, your neck and a tiny patch of skin near your clavicle that made your toes curl.

Suna, who loves the face you make when he grins at you, eyes glazed, lips ruddy and hair falling forward into his face, warm and glowing.

Suna who moans when your teeth drag against his flesh, hands digging into your flesh as lips replaced teeth, pressing fleeting, featherlight kisses up the vertical length of his neck, towards the junction beneath his ear.

Suna, who arches a brow every time you try to prank him, engaged in an impressive display of restraint by not rolling his eyes.

“Come on baby, let me prank you just this once!”

His brow stays arched. Once you’d given up and let him hold your hand while driving and let him open doors for you, he’d lean in to whisper, “that’s a good girl”

The first time Suna realized he wanted you, like wanted your hands that lit him on fire, wanted to kiss you, hold you, go on midnight drives with you, make playlists for you, take pictures of you, when he realizes he likes you looking at him like that, with warmth, open and glowing, he does not accept the misfortune of being right next to you, because the weight of such a thing is insurmountable.

He simply leans back against the wall, closes his eyes in the middle of the fucking conversation and just breathes and counts slowly in his head. It is incredibly and unfairly impossible to ignore every impulse telling him to just fucking confess already because something in his chest wanted to get out, get to you. Some primal thing trying to claw its way out of a cage, to call you his.

Suna who lets you collapse into him after a tiring day, muffling tiny sobs against his chest. Suna who curls his arms around your shoulders, over your head, tucking you in and keeping you safe, his face pressed against the top of your head, telling you about the funniest things to distract you.

Suna who tells you, “You are my most favorite person in this world, you know.”

Bruh, I’m literally your girl!

Suna who takes the most unflattering pics of you for his private album but if you want to post some on your social media? He’ll slay. He’s got a polaroid of you in his wallet and your initials around his neck.

Suna who calls you love, who gets all soft and pitiful, gazing at you with those big puppy eyes and it’s not fair. You ate my fucking snacks boy!?

Suna loved you during all your midnight conversations, in the liminal space between wakefulness and staying asleep. Suna who loves it when you play the guitar for him, loves your singing that is a little off key.

Suna who loved you when you held his hand, pouted with jealousy, when your laughter escaped you. Suna who couldn’t believe that you, magic made life could love him, but fuck was he never letting you go.

[the-fiction-witch]

Cowboy Rule 48

Media Godless

Character Whitey Winn

Couple Whitey X Reader

Rating Smut

Concept  Anonymous asked:Hello I understand stand if you say no but can you do an Whitey Winn x reader smut but it has the the cowboy rule. The cowboy rule is if a girl wears a cowboy's hat she rides or will ride the cowboy.Thank you if you do it. 🥰

Smut Playfull/ riding/ hikis/ kissing/ breast play/ fondling/ bj

I smiled as I finished lacing my dress for the day pulling the ribbons of my dress tight to keep it on me all day. I grabbed the pie cooling in the window and set it in my basket alongside some jars of preserves and a few bottles of honey wine. I picked up my now-loaded basket and headed out of my little house into the dust and dry dirt of Labelle. I glanced to the sky hoping perhaps to see some dark clouds on the horizon as we badly needed some rain but alas the normal dry New Mexico heat was all we received. I headed through town past all the little shops the ladies now ran in order to keep the town going giving the ladies building the church a wave as I went past, till I reached the town square heading over to the familiar building.

'Sheriff, Labelle, New Mexico territory'

Atop two four square windows. The porch with a couple of chairs and a large pile of logs for the burner inside. A small lamp light hung beside the porch steps just before the door.

I hopped up the steps and in through the unlocked door looking around the small office with its three cells lining the far wall. Sheriff Bill Mcnue's desk to my left was empty as per usual, the coat rack to my left alongside a small window, and In Front of me was the large gun cabinet full of shotguns, and pistols, the mirror lining the back of the cabinet. And In Front of the cabinet, the deputy's desk was lined with various paperwork, keys and coffee cups given he'd been on his own so long. And in the small wooden chair behind it laid a comatose deputy whitey Winn.

In his usual mud-covered brown leather boots, his borderline skin-tight jeans with a slight vertical striping in the fabric pulled up to his waist, his two dark brown leather gun Belts sat crossed over his hips so a buckle sat above his pants fly and the other just above his butt allowing him to have a 45. On each hip. The white handles guns sat there slightly moving with his breaths. His 'once' white shirt collar was only just visible, his slightly green half-button overshirt covering him from wrist to neck with a small breast pocket where his silver deputy badge hung. Any skin exposed had enough dirt to set potatoes, so much muck in fact under his nails I was almost convinced he was growing himself garden, his excuse for facial hair slightly graced the corners of his upper lip barely even meeting in the middle with maybe three hairs under his bottom lip and I don't think any on his chin, his hair thick with grease and dirt or slightly matting in sections where he runs his hand thought it but that was all. The familiar scent of sweat, dirt, warm leather and the unfortunate scent of a man who lives alone is eliminated from him like a pile of roadkill tossed to the gutter. His hat was on the desk, his hands on his stomach as he sat in his chair far asleep.

I couldn't help but giggle at the slight setting my basket down on the corner of his desk atop some of his gun magazines. I carefully snuck over to behind his desk leaning down to see him. I smiled and gently rubbed the tip of my nose against his own the first few runs bore no response but soon he began to move Against me too subtly of course until I move and pressed a small kiss to his lips which caused a wide smile across his lips

"Hi" I smiled

He rubbed his nose on my own a little before giving my lips a little kiss "hi" he smiled opening his eyes to see me "what are ya doin' 'ere?" He asks leaning back in his chair

"What? Are you not happy to see me whitey?" I pouted putting my hands on my hips as I stood up straight

He leant forward leaning his arms on his desk and his jaw on his hand "I'm always 'appy to see ya darlin'" he smiled giving me another little kiss

"Cute" I smiled tapping his nose "how have things been?"

"Quiet" he sighed "it's Labelle darlin' nothin' much ever 'appens 'round 'ere" he says leaning back in his chair

"You finished that paperwork bill asked you to do?"

"Jesus Christ y/n- I finished all that lot last week"

"Sorry"

"It's alright. I don't think ya quite get just 'ow dull thin's can be 'round 'ere" he laughed

"I suppose not. Any news?"

"From?"

"Bill?"

"Course not. He'll get back when he gets back. As much as I know darlin'" he shrugs

"Alright, I just hope it's not too much longer it's not fair bill to abandon town for so long"

"It's nothin' I can't 'andle" he smirked

"Not my point. Just because you can doesn't mean you should have too. You only getting paid a deputy salary and frankly, you're doing all the work will bill gone so much" I explained

"I know what ya mean. Don't worry ya'self alright I'll 'ave a word with bill when he's back" he says getting up and giving my forehead a kiss "besides won't be long will bill packs it in, then I'll take over" he says as he wandered over fixing himself another coffee

"What makes you so sure he'll let you?"

"I'm his deputy y/n, it's kinda the whole idea" he laughed

"Then what makes you so sure he'll pack it in soon?"

"He has to at some point and he ain't gettin' any younger. He spends most of his time in the undertakers playin' chess anyhow" he laughed returning to his desk coffee in hand "what's in the basket?" He finally asks honestly I wouldn't be surprised if he hadn't even noticed it till now

"Presents" I smiled taking the basket and hiding it from him putting it behind my back

"Ooh? Let me see" he Cooes getting up but I moved back

"There a secret"

"Are they? Come on darlin' let me see"

"No" I giggled bolting across the office but he gave chase rushing around the office trying to catch me as I circled around the desks till he cornered me between the last cells bars and the wooden wall basket still behind me but his arms on the wall and bars so I had nowhere to go

"Let me see"

"No"

"Why not?"

"Secrets"

"Come on darlin', please" he Cooes

"On one condition"

"What condition?"

I simply shrugged and his smile grew before he leant down capturing my lips in a sweet Intense kiss his lips slowly moving Against my own his arm moving from the wall to wrap around my waist his left hand on my left hip wrapped around my back, until we both pulled back for a moment he was breathless staring at my lips before glancing up to my eyes

"'appy?"

"Ummm humm" I nodded

"Good" he Cooes rubbing his nose on my own and snatching my basket returning to his desk so I scampered back too. "Ooooh pie! What kind of pie?"

"Sweet potato pie" I smiled

"Aww ya always make my favourite darlin'"

"Cause you always ask for it" I smiled

"Thank you very much"

"You're welcome"

He happily unpacked the rest of the basket putting all the bits and bobs away in their usual place as well as having himself a slice of pie "ummmm delicious as always darlin" he says giving my cheek a kiss as he ate as he did I couldn't help glancing to his hat still sat on the table so I sneaking began to walk my fingers across the desk towards the hat but before I could even touch the rim he slapped my hand

"Oww!" I complained

"Don't even think about it" he warns sternly giving me a sharp glare picking his hat up and dusting off some dirt

"I just wanted to look"

"Look with ya eyes. Not ya fingers" he warns

"I only wanted a look" I pouted

"No y/n"

"Why not?"

"Breaks the rules"

"Fine. I'm heading home"

"Alright I'll be 'ere a bit longer, did ya want me to … pop by when I'm done?" He suggested

"It's alright whitey I'll be fine all by myself. Have a nice afternoon" I smiled giving him a little kiss taking my basket and headed out

"You too Darlin'" he smiled blowing me a kiss as I left.

I smiled as I scrubbed and washed the little pots and dishes that had mounted up over god only knows how long it had been since whitey did any dishes, christ some of mine were in here from pies and roasts I had sent over to the office for him. I was rather thankful whitey asked for my help in tidying his house as it so desperately needed it and I knew with my oversight he couldn't half-ass it and the place would defiantly be cleaned. While I was scrubbing and cleaning the dishes and bottles, Whitey knelt on the floor cleaning out the fireplace cluttering and clattering the fireplace with the little tools. "How old are some of these?" I asked slightly concerned

"Hum? Ohh No idea darlin' I stopped keeping track" he explained

"You need to learn how to take better care of this place"

"I know, I just don't get a lot of time workin' in the office so much. usually, a soon as I get 'ome I just kinda collapse and sleep"

"Wherever would you be without me" I giggled

"Humm I'd be lost without ya y/n" he cooes giving my cheek a kiss as he came to wash his hands and face given they were now covered in ash and soot from the fireplace.

"you need a bath" I told him

he sighed "I'll take a damn bath when the 'ouse is clean"

"Alright, you fix your bed I'll get started on the laundry" I smiled

"Alright" He smiled heading to his bed and stripping it off "ya know I don't really need to lean to upkeep the 'ouse" He says

"don't you?" I glared sorting his clothes into... well I tried to colours at least original colours some of which were very hard to tell, was this shirt ever white? or was it just grey? I don't know I don't remember it ever being white. "Why not?"

"Well what's the point in me learnin' all the 'ouse stuff. Might as well just get myself a wife"

"Whitey!"

"Ya know what I mean, No point me leanin' it all if ya just gonna move in a month later" he shrugs

I chuckled "whitey when we get married you're going to do chores too"

"Why?" he whines "I'm the 'usband. your 'ot sexy deputy 'usband." He cooes coming to cuddle me "Who works all day while his pretty wife makes nice dinner ready for him to get 'ome"

"Ummm, and cleans the house, looks after the children, all while the husband sits on his ass"

"Yeah" he shrugs

"whitey" I glared turning to face him crossing my arms "if you ever want me to be Mrs Winn, you better learn to do chores and take care of things. Or you ain't got a cat in hells chance of getting anywhere with me" I told him "and you can drop that attitude too"

"I'm just sayin' my little wifey would be the one at 'ome with the children. While I go to work"

"I know but you're still helping. I ain't raising our children, doing all the chores and taking care of you Mr" I told him as I sorted his clothes

"I'll 'elp. got to teach my little boys to shoot as good as their daddy"

"They still have to go to school whitey"

"Why? I didn't"

"My point exactly." I giggled

"fine" He sighed "this is good though, gettin' it all square now. then we'll 'ave no arguments about how we raise our babies when we get married" he smiled giving my cheek a kiss and going to remake his bed with the fresh bedding

"You're not abandoning them like bill does his kids"

"course I won't ya know I won't darlin' I just don't see the point in learnin' all the 'ouse stuff"

"Well you better. You can clean your own damn britches whitey I ain't your wife yet" I told him handing over the pile of laundry for him to do as I took  a hot pot outside filling up the steal tub grabbing a washboard from the wall and began washing his shirts and such

"yet" he smiled following me out with his own so we could sit together while we did the laundry "Ya would be if he wrote me back already"

"Still no news then?" I asked

"No, I wrote him over two months ago startin' to get a little worried"

"I'm sure It'll be through soon" I smiled giving his cheek a little kiss, Honestly I was a little worried too. A few months ago whitey penned a letter, with help. To my grandfather the last of my family still living for permission for us to get married but we had yet to hear back anything at all. Frankly, it was the only reason we weren't yet married, even if I'm sure if permission was denied he'd likely marry me anyways. I know he's getting impatient and I had to admit I was too it was such a small but inconvenient hurdle to get over before we could truly start our life together before the jokes and stories of us living together and raising a family could become more than simple tales.

"I wonder if Bill'll give me time off when we get married?" He pondered

"I'm sure he would if you asked nicely" I giggled

"Maybe as we are 'avin' to wait so long" He smirked suggestively

"You get no more than your kisses till after we're married whitey"

"Damn it" he sighed "Come on we've been datin' a year and a 'alf"

"So? not till we're married that's my rules," I told him as I took the clean laundry hanging it all over the line just outside his house. Once all done heading inside with the water pot, as I did I noticed his boots and jacket by the door so I grabbed the brush giving them a dust and a brush cleaning off his leather jacket I then reached for his hat to give it a dust off and a clean however he was just heading in and before I could even lift it from its place on the rack he snatched it out my hand

"No." he snapped setting his pot with my own by the fire

"what?"

"No. no touchin' ya know that" he warns

"I was only going to give it a brush whitey" I complained

"Ya 'ave you're rules darlin' I 'ave mine. Ya don't touch my hat alright?"

"Fine" I sighed "Be like that" I pouted

"I will do. don't get all pouty with me just cause ya can't 'ave what ya want"

"Look who's talking"

"Funny." he chuckled giving my cheek a kiss "No, touchin'" He warns

I smiled as I stood brushing little buttercup, Often times catching whitey across the way taking care of his own horse ted brushing him, feeding him and generally taking care of him. "Eyes front Mr Winn" I told him

"Why? What's the matter little lady? you're not normally so grumpy with me"

"Well I'm working"

"as I am, Can't 'elp if my work's such a good view" he cooes

I finished up with buttercup and went over to help with out with ted "Maybe if you did more work, and not such on the view little ted would be finished up by now?"

"maybe so, But I can't 'elp it" he cooes coming around to pull me into a cuddle peppering my neck and cheek with kisses "ya too damn pretty"

"Am I now?"

"I can't resist ya. and ya know I can't say no to ya darlin'"

"So cuddly today whitey"

"Well I've been in the office all week I've barely seen ya" He complained "or cuddled ya. or kissed ya" he cooes

"True. Guess you've been busy" I giggled grabbing the rim of his hat and bolting across the stable

"Very funny darlin', give it" He says playfully

"No,"

"Very sweet, very cute, now 'and it over"

"No, my hat now" I giggled cuddling it close to my chest

"I ain't playin' darlin' give it" he complained trying to take it but I moved around ted "This ain't funny y/n" He says now getting rather angry with me as whenever he tried to take it I simply moved though the stables to a point where he couldn't reach me. "Y/n! give it back!"

"Mine now" I giggled "Maybe I'll hop on buttercup take your guns and become a cute little cowgirl" I smiled holding the hat just above my head

"don't ya dare" he warns "Give it back y/n"

"awww do you not think I'd make a cute cowgirl whitey?"

"Ya would look adorable but give me my hat back"

"Humm I'm the fastest shootin' cowgirl in the west," I giggled playfully "Pew pew"

"I ain't playin' y/n give it back."

"why?"

"its the rules darlin' "

"what rule?"

"Ya wear the hat ya better ride the cowboy" He smirked leaning on the wooden collum of the roof of the stable

"what sort of a rule is that?"

"The cowboy rules darlin'." he smirked "Rule 48 ya wear the hat ya ride the cowboy"

"You're making that up"

"No I'm not it's right 'ere in the cowboy 'andbook" he says getting a small book

"wh-where did you have that?" I asked "I know how damn tight your trousers are whitey where did you have that?"

"My pocket." he shrugs "see right here Rule 48 ya wear the hat ya ride the cowboy" he says setting the book in the bag in teds stable

"who made that rule?"

"Fellow boys sick of you girlies stealin' thin's" He says once again trying to take it but I moved back again "Darlin' give it. ya know the rules so 'and it over"

"So what if I was to sit this on my little head I'd have to-"

"Yes you would."

"That goes against my rules"

"its the cowboy rules dalin' been this way for generations. So mine ourways your's" he smirked "Give it."

"Or else what?"

"Else I'm bloody takin' it"

"Not if you can't catch me" I giggled bolting out the stable door and into the dust of town of course he immiedatly bolted after me I imagine the ladies of town likely thought we'd gone insane as we ran around labelled chasing each other like children until I bolted into his house and he soon caught up with me so I smiled and sat his hat on my head "Don't you think I look pretty?" I giggled

he smirked pulling the door shut and locking it behind him "ya shouldn't 'ave done that darlin'"

"I think I look cute"

"ya look very cute. but ya know the rules."

"Okay" I smiled

"O-Okay?"

"I broke the rules" I shrug "Guess the town deputy should punish his little cowgirl correctly"

"humm come 'ere then darlin'" he smirked taking me in his arms pulling me tight to his skinny body leaning down to capture my lips in a kiss more intese then I had ever felt he slipped the hat off my head sitting it on his table as he pulled me closer his arms around my waist giving me utterly no escape from him our kiss so intense and lustful it was clearly the whole of his frustrations where coming out in this meer kiss even moaning into my mouth a little as his hand slipped down to grab my ass though my dress, he pulled back rather suddenly forcing me to his bed I went to lean or lay down but he stopped me kissing my cheek "Ah ah ah. Ya wear the hat ya better ride the cowboy darlin' remember." he smirked turning us around so he could sit on his bed "Ya ain't layin' on ya back to get this over with. You wanted this. Now ya gotta pay the price"

"I wouldn't dream of it whitey" I smiled climbing into his lap settling myself on his thighs the moment I did his cool smirking deminer stopped and his sharp excited breaths broke through as he glanced at my lips and then down biting his lip as he saw how close our bodies where, given after all court time together out privets had never been this close before. And given he had always wanted this even since our earliest courting days I can imagine he was excited. Infact I didn't need to imagine as I felt the shiftening close to my stomach and a sharply spoken sentence came from his lips as he hovered over my own

"We're really gonna do this." He said less stated like a question and more as a statement more as if he was reafirming it to himself

"You said it was the rules," I pouted

"It is! it is." he says "Sorry- I uhh I'm more nervous then I thought I'd be"

"Well, I promise to be gentle. So long as your gentle with me whitey"

"I will." he gave me a sharp kiss "I promise"

"Alright, how would my cowboy like me to ride him then?"

For a moment he seemed utterly shocked at the words coming out of my mouth but he didn't waste his time, kicking off his boots and throwing his belts onto his bedside table moving and getting settled down his bed so he could have his head on his pillow and I knelt fully over his hips with the sheets below us. I don't know why but even in my utter innocence I got a strange confidence from sitting over a nervous, overexctied whitey, that this big strong deputy boy reacted to my every movement, my every word, as if he was made of clay and I could shape him however I wanted. that even though my family had always explained it as being a holster for a boys loaded gun to settle when he pleased, I didn't feel that way at all. I slipped my hands down his shirt towards his pants feeling him stiffen below me more, his hips shifting to work into myu hands, holding his breath as I moved over his stomach. I felt powerful more powerful then I ever had before. he sat up a little and recaptured my lips as I reached the buttons of his pants so I happily kissed back as I slowly undid them each button I unbuttoned caused his lips to somewhat quiver against my own until they where completely undone which caused a soft moan where his tight pants released. he pulled back a moment but only to push his own trousers down as well as his once white cotton underwear down with them, I couldn't help my curiosity moving back slightly to see his much paler hips and prominate V a gracing of hair not to dissimilar to his upper lip, light, thin and patchy to say the least. and of course what drew the most of my attention his hard cock stood tall clearly at the point it couldn't get any harder he smirked a little leaning on his elbows glancing down at himself

"My little cowgirl like the look of her ride?" he smirked

"Ummm humm" I nodded stroking my finger up the shaft testing just how far it was from his base to his tip thinking how exactly he would fit inside me,

"Ummm" He groans biting his bottom lip hard watching me hand

"I'm not hurting you am I whitey?" I asked

"No, ya good darlin' ya fine" he says quickly

"alright" I smiled giving his lips a kiss before then kissing down his neck a little

"Ummmm darlin', you're stallin'" he smirked leaning his head back to give me more space to kiss

"We'll I just want to prepare for my ride," I whispered moving down at first he seemed confused but I pressed a little kiss to his shaft and he froze up his whole body going tense for a second his eyes wide so I gave him another kiss, and then another peppering little kisses along his shaft when I glanced back up his head was rolled back his mouth open "should I?" I began

"Ya fine ya good." he quickly snapped

"well I don't want to keep stalling if your waiting whitey" I giggled licking from base to tip

"Ughh! no no take ya time darlin' I wanna make sure my little cowgirls ready for 'er ride" he smirked

"I was thinking more making sure he was ready for me," I cooed "I thought he could need a little more... lubrication before we start riding"

"Ya could be right darlin', he's gonna need a little more then that then" he smirked

"you think so?" I asked licking from base to tip again which made him physically shudder

"Ummm hummm" he nods biting hard on his lip trying not to moan "please"

"what?" I giggled

"Please darlin" he whines shifting his hips in his desperation I smiled giving his tip  a little kiss before I slowly took what I could into my mouth I couldn't take all of it in my mouth so I settled my hand below my mouth to pump up into my mouth as I gently licked and moved my head back and forth slowly of course given I was so new to this but I don't think he cared - "Uhhhh! uuughhh! uuughhhrrr!" moans tumbled from his lips like a waterfall his fingers gripping his sheets his head rolling back "Ughhh! fuck that feels so good" he groans unable to control his hips shifting and working with me which I took as a sign to speed up both my hand and my head gently suckling on him as I did which caused his eyes to roll back and sounds out of him like I'd never heard animalistic I suppose he gave up to trying to keep himself up laying down on his bed writhing with his sheets always in response to my movements and changes in speed or style, it was adorable watching him utterly loose himself his calm strong deminer disappeared completely as he was left utterly at the mercy of my tiny movements even just a flick of my tongue or a squeeze of my hand was enough to force noises and reactions out of him utterly reveling in my new found power. Until I think I hit a breaking point in him as he almost screamed "Y/n! Please! baby stop please! I'm gonna cum!"

I pulled back giggling "You've never called me that before?"

"You've never done that to me before" he gasps

"Alright" I smirked

"Oh fuck I'm already learnin' that looks bad with you" he says slightly scared I smiled and took his hand giving it a soft little kiss letting him settle his hand on my head to gently play with my hair which eh happily did knotting his fingers in my curls until I returned to him taking much more this time as I slowly worked out how to relax my throat allowing almost all of him inside my mouth which caused him to grip my hair slightly guiding me "ughhhhh! stop! stop please!" he begs even if his hand continued guiding me clearly at a point his body was doing one thing and his head another, his head desperate for us to finally make love after all this time but his body already caving in desperate for release, I moved back letting him breathe a little as I climbed out of bed "hey! where do ya think you're goin'" He smirked grabbing my arm

"Just getting comfortable to ride" I smiled unlacing my dress he egarly watched me undoing my dress letting it fall to the floor as well as unlacing my corset, and pushing off my little undergarment shorts leaving me in merely my white underdress and nothing else the dress thin and almost see though my nipples slightly poking though the top of the dress I hadn't noticed given I was battling my dress but he had grasped his erection slowly touching himself to the mere sight of me precum now leaking from his head I giggled and pinned up m hair "shall we?" I smiled

"Absoloutely darlin'" he smirked offering his hand so I took it and he helped me climb back into the bed and ontop of him I got settled on his thighs a moment my little dress around us "I'll guide ya at first okay?" He asks and I nodded "Good, go on then be my cute little cowgirl" he cooes rubbing his nose on my own he held my hips guiding them up and closer for a second one hand left to check himself was in the right position, I held his shoulders a little nervously unsure how it would feel "Okay, down just like a saddle" he says

"Aren't I usually trying to avoid sitting on the hard pointy things on my saddle"

"True" he chuckled I slowly moved down his hands often slightly adjusting my hips until I felt the pressure of his shift cock under me for a moment I moved my hips a little trying to find the sweet spot it being much further back then I thought making me lean almost completely on him before we found it and his tip slipped inside me enough to make us both freeze up a little "There we are," he cooes I held his shoulders tight as I slowly moved my hips lower and lower feeling each inch of him slip inside me until I hit his hips and thighs meaning he was completely inside me I could feel him throbbing inside me with his heartbeat, it felt strange but very pleasurable just having him fill a space I hadn't ever felt filled before. it took a solid minute of us both just getting settled and used to the new sensation before I began to move my hips as if I was riding a horse his hands softly guided me that way too back and forth in small hip movements until I got a stable pace "fuck- I've waited so long for this" he groans his hands moving from my hips to my ass stroking and groping me as I moved "Ummm we on a leisurely stroll baby?" he groans kissing my neck

"why?"

"I don't think either of us 'ave ever ridden this slow" he smirked

"if you want me to go faster just say that whitey" I giggled

"Alright, faster. Please baby" he cooes

I smirked and began moving much faster taking things at a pace that would pleasure me and clearly drove him crazy as he groped and kissed me intensely to hide his moans and groans of pleasure even if some still slipped through

"Fuck- Ughhhhhh! ughhhhh! y/n! Ughhhhhhh! you feel so good!"

"Whitey?"

"Ughhh yeah y/n?" he groans leaving hikis on my neck

"Does this-" I began moving up and down a little to slightly bounce as I ride

"UGHHHH! FUCK! Yes! yes, that's amazing!" he groans digging his nails into my ass helping to bounce me more now our pace rapid and merciless "Uuuuhhhh! uuugggggh! Please! Please... baby stop I'll-"

I immediately smirked getting a little faster and squeezing himself around him which made him moan "The cowgirl decides when we're done riding whitey. and not until" I smirked

"Y/n Ughhhhhh! please I'm so close" he groans "fuck I love ya so much"

"Ughh I love you too whitey" I groaned admittedly slowing down where I knew I was close too he even moved his own hips to work into my movements both of us groaning and moaning until I hit a wave of overwhelming pleasure that made he squeal pulling whitey's hair hard pulling him into my chest as my toes curled and my fingers gripped his hard hard "Uhhhhhhhhhhhhh! Whitey!"

"Ughhhhh fuck! fuck fuck!" he groans against my skin collapsing against me for a moment I just gasped trying to think straight, once my mind returned I glanced down and noticed I'd kinda forced whitey's head into my breasts a little

"Ohh sorry whitey" I giggled letting go of him but he didn't move

"I'm fine" He smiled nuzzling himself there

"Get out of there you" I complained pulling him out "sorry"

"It's fine, ya don't ever need to apologize for forcin' me into your boobs it's not a problem."

"Are you okay? you want me to-"

"Ohh I kinda- when ya were screamin'" he smiled slowly pulling out "That was amazin' darlin'"

"it was, maybe I should steal your hat more often"

"You're more than welcome" he cooes peppering me with little kisses and making me giggle until he all out flipped us over into his bed so we could kiss and cuddle "Ummm I love ya so much, I wanna marry ya so badly"

"You're only sayin' that cause you finally got to have sex with me" "no I mean it, I wanted to marry ya before, now I know just how amazin' it is when we have sex." He cooes playing with my hair

"Sweet, You probably want me out the-"

"No no you're staying 'ere tonight, I want my darlin' in my arms tonight"

"Awww okay whitey," I smiled giving him a soft kiss "Goodnight" I smiled nuzzling into his chest

"Goodnight darlin'" he smiled cuddling me tightly

[pokemonbiologyirlthetabletop]

Spinarak & Ariados

Spinarak (#167)

Arachnifoveros viridis

General Information: Spinarak are spider Pokémon, who produce a poison that is fairly harmless to humans but potent enough to stun prey. They average in at 1’8 feet tall (0.5 M) and 18.7 pounds (8.5 kg). Which is, in fact, a rather large spider.

Habitat: Spinaraks are found in temperate and tropical forests across the globe. During winter they hibernate or simply die off.

Spinaraks and Ariadoses are not natively found on Antarctica, Australia, or Aotearoa (New Zealand).

Life Cycles: Spinarak are able to reproduce as soon as they are strong enough to spare the resources (level 15, as is standard). Once or twice a year, depending on the climate, they will lay around 200 fist-sized eggs (the normal size of bug types). Like other bugs, their eggs are heavily predated upon, and the babies are eaten regularly by bird Pokémon. In a clutch of 200, about 1-4 will survive to reproductive maturity.

Behavior: Spinarak live mostly solitary lives. Their main source of socialization is with other Spinaraks, when finding mates, and the occasional neutral Pokémon—someone who is neither prey nor considers the Spinarak prey. They’re amicable enough when raised by humans and can make a good companion for those who live more introverted lives.

Diet: Spinarak will try to consume anything that it can catch in its web, but due to size constrictions this tends to be other bugs. It’s favorite prey are Cutieflies!

Conservation: Least Concern.

Seriously, they’re spiders. And big ones. Just try getting rid of these fuckers—bet you can’t!

Relationship with Humans: Spinaraks are, well, spiders. While they are certainly cute spiders, they are still just spiders. They are both a nuisance to households everywhere and a boon to anyone with sense because a Spinarak will happily eat all of the other unwanted pests that come crawling around your basement! Additionally, their spider silk is incredibly strong, which humans have been using for fishing nets for thousands of years, and some cultures even use the silk to treat wounds. Spinaraks are common enough in media as any generic spider would be.

Spinarak are seen as perfectly suitable companions for new trainers, though few municipalities give Spinaraks out as starter Pokémon. This is less a problem with Spinarak, and more because of the fact that they evolve into Ariados…

Classification: “Arachnifoveros” means “horrifying spider” and “viridis” mean “green.”

Ariados (#168)

Arachnifoveros arachnifoveros

General Information: Ariadoses are the evolved form of Spinarak, and thus the Very Large Spider Pokémon. The tiny hooks on Ariados’s claws allow it to scale even vertical ceilings. Their average size is 3’7 feet tall (1.1 M) and 73.9 pounds (33.5 kg).

Habitat: Temperate and tropical forests around the globe. They have also been known to make their nests in caves.

Life Cycles: Ariados life cycles are similar to that of Spinarak, but as a much stronger Pokémon a female Ariados will lay clutches between 300 and 500 Spinarak eggs. The parent Ariadoses will even provide basic parental care of the eggs in the form of protection and guardianship up until hatching. Upon hatching, the baby Spinaraks are left to fend for themselves.

Ariados females will mate with males of other species that can withstand combat against it. Weak males are likely to be consumed. To this end, male Spinaraks rarely mate with female Ariadoses, but the reverse is not true.

There are few predators of Ariados. The most notable ones tend to be large bird Pokémon that can successfully defend itself against the Ariados, such as Talonflame, Braviary, and Corviknight. Packs of Arcanines and Houndooms have also shown themselves to be successful predators.

Behavior: The eggs of a mother Ariados will be laid in a protective nest, such as a cave or tree hollow, but in absence of a proper hollow the Ariados will create its own nest that it covers in protective spider silk to keep predators out.

Ariados are cruel hunters who will shoot single threads onto its victims, then follow them back to their nest where their bodily fluids are drank at a leisurely rate. Sometimes, it will allow one of its victims to escape with a single thread still attached to it, allowing the Ariados to follow it back to its friends.

Diet: Ariados are the ultimate generalist predator. They will eat anything that they can catch. In fact, if a Pokémon is smaller than Ariados and is not a steel, poison, ghost, rock, fire, flying, or electric type, then wild Ariadoses will consider it prey. This includes humans. The typings above are not automatically prey because of different incompatibilities, but that certainly won’t stop an Ariados from trying to eat a Pokémon of those typings. For example, a Togedemaru is a steel/electric type, making it both immune to Ariados’s venom and an excellent counter attacker with its electric shocks, but it is the right size to be Ariados prey and a young Ariados who is still learning what is and is not edible will certainly try to eat a Togedemaru that comes its way. Don’t worry, the Togedemaru will be fine in this scenario.

Conservation: Least Concern

Relationship with Humans: Ariados have been known to eat children! Yes, that’s right, human toddlers are meal-sized for a hungry Ariados, and let’s just say humans haven’t been happy with their existence ever since.

For as long as humans and Ariadoses have both been alive, there has been a heated war against each other. Ariadoses see small humans as food (because of course they do), and in retaliation we have notoriously liked killing Ariadoses, for food or for sport, though many cultures did at least eat them on principle. One would think that this would lead to the extinction of Ariadoses, but no, they breed way too quickly and are notoriously skillful predators and evasive prey. The Spinaraks might be fine (for some), but Ariadoses have been the enemy of humanity since the dawn of history. Many an old children’s story involves the slaying of a horrifying Ariados or being caught in its web, and the presence of Ariadoses (and Galvantulas) in adventure books persists well into the present day.

As for Pokémon Trainers, Ariadoses can make fine companions and excellent battlers, but the Pokémon Rangers will have better luck managing these beasts than regular trainers will. After all, millions of years of evolution-driven animosity does not make for good cooperation. The Spinarak may be a good companion for the introverted sort, but give that Spinarak an Everstone until you’re ready to take care of a Very Large Spider. Ariadoses are best suited for skilled trainers, possibly someone with several gym badges, or a Pokémon Ranger.

Classification: Ariados are the namesake of their genus, Arachnifoveros and was one of the earliest Pokémon ever classified by Linnaeus.

Evolution: Ariados evolve from Spinarak at level 22.

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Hey guess what, if you like my stuff, this is my website where you can find other Pokémon I've written on and more information about the game that I’m slowly making! Check it out! I write books sometimes too.