#its okie if you like those stuff though

[kenandeliza]

Me trying to find a non-angst/ non-torture DP fanfic:

[vikkirosko]

Hi, I was wondering if I could order some angst, with a side of fluff.

I was thinking we could do a one shot with lucifer where the reader got into some trouble with people (anyone really loan sharks whatever) and ended up getting killed, but not with angelic weapon so you'd eventually come back and stuff it might just take a while. How would he deal with those people. Would he make you go on bed rest and make you soup in bed. Maybe give you a support rubber duckies. Maybe he'd be very gentle, like too gentle and you have to reassure him it's okie to like hug you and stuff.

Sorry his idea popped in my head and hasn't made its way out.

Thank you, and make sure to take care of yourself.

🍎 Lucifer Morningstar x Reader Oneshot Don't ever die again 🐍

When Lucifer saw Angel Dust hurriedly carrying you, covered in blood, to your room, he realized that something bad had happened. He hurried to you, and Angel tried to calm Lucifer down, but he couldn't do it. As it turned out, you were returning to the hotel and you were attacked by several bandits who perceived you two as easy prey. You fought them, but they killed you. When Lucifer heard about this, he felt his heart stop, but Angel hastily said that you were not killed with an angelic weapon, which means you should have woken up relatively soon. Since that day, Lucifer has hardly left your side. He would have dealt with the sinners who hurt you himself if it wasn't for the fact that Angel killed them earlier. You were on bed rest because your wounds needed time to heal. Lucifer brought you food that he cooked himself, made sure that you didn't overexert yourself, and in the evenings sat with you until you fell asleep. But even after you fell asleep, Lucifer stayed by your side. He was scared. He was afraid that if he left, he would come back to find that you were dead, but completely. He still remembered how you lay on the bed, not breathing, and how he couldn't find peace until you started breathing again. He was afraid of losing you, just as he was afraid of losing his daughter. He loved you, and was ready to protect you from all dangers, but Lucifer was not always there, and this made his fear stronger. Now, looking at you sleeping peacefully in bed, he held your hand and could only hope that you would be safe. Realizing that he should have left, Lucifer tried to get up, but even though you were asleep, you continued to hold his hand. Lucifer understood that he was unable to leave you now, so he lay down next to you, feeling how fatigue began to get the better of him. He didn't know how yet, but he was going to protect you from all the dangers you might encounter in Hell. Already on the verge of sleep, Lucifer, feeling your warmth, whispered a single phrase.

"Please don't ever die again..."

[togglesbloggle]

Okie, here’s a slightly dangerous essay I’ve had rattling around for a while.  Dangerous because Discourse, which I usually avoid in this space, so I hope you’ll try not to reward it too much and provide weird incentives for me.  But it’s a pretty interesting little model, too handy to fully pass over in silence.

Expect mild gender-binary essentialism and heteronormativity for modeling purposes- invoking these things in an explanatory but not normative or ethical sense.

Aside from being aggressively horrible, the state of female beauty standards as a cultural force is also fiddly and interesting in a way that I can’t resist chewing on.  Naively, beauty ought to be a pretty idiosyncratic thing.  We understand differences in taste between Picasso and Rembrant, or a trip to the mountains and a trip to the beach.  But when it comes to human beauty, especially female beauty, we keep needing to reach for phrases like ‘traditionally attractive,’ and things in that vicinity.  It’s understood that this ‘traditionally attractive’ stuff has tremendous influence over how our society is ordered, but its origin seems… vague, at best?  And it clearly varies between cultures and times; it’s monotonic, not static.  And the further away you get from socially mainstream forms of sex, the more it breaks down.  Gay and kink communities seem to resist it somewhat, in the form of ‘types’ like bears and butches and whatnot, though it’s still lurking in the shadows a fair bit.  So, why?

I’ve arrived at a model that seems to have decent predictive utility, which is: (female) beauty standards are set principally by the ability to convince others that you can leverage male agency.

This is, notably, not exactly the same thing as actually leveraging male agency, or even actually being able to.  Male agency itself, though notably responsive to beautiful women in the general case, is of course a lot more complex when you start talking about individual men.  These may be asexual or gay, obviously, but even the ones attracted to women are going to have individual preferences, navigate those preferences in different ways, and be more or less responsive to leverage.  So to ‘be beautiful’ you’re attempting to land on a consensus, common-knowledge understanding of what everyone else thinks men are attracted to, one that’s anchored by the experiences and preferences of men, but because it’s women who try to achieve beauty in most cases, female-led social spaces are often where ‘beauty’ is processed and filtered from the complicated individual preferences of men and forged in to a coherent set of standards for women to work towards.  (Economic forces also play an important role, of course, and are gendered in different ways.)

That consensus, in turn, need not correspond to the preferences of any individual man, even though it’s still (in a removed sense) ‘about’ male preference.  An individual woman can even sometimes find more success in the dating market by deliberately stepping away from traditional beauty standards and finding something closer to the actual preferences of (a subset of) the men around her, though that means sacrificing real and important status in other circles.  Because as power, the concept of beauty depends on the state of common knowledge among people on both sides of the gender dynamic as much as it does on the behaviors and preferences of men.  This is part of what allows beauty standards to vary so widely in time and place (that is, they’re arbitrary to some degree), but be so strong wherever they appear- it’s a Schelling point that women can use to communicate both to men and to other women that they have some degree of influence over others.  Thus, one of the many tragedies that heterosexual romance has to navigate.  To achieve beauty as power, women have to get closer to that Schelling point, even though being ‘beautiful’ in that sense may actually make it harder to find a good partner that you like.  Beauty means the competition is tougher, you’re locked out of considering the preferences of individual men you care about, you’re locked in to fairly oppressive standards that sand off many of your own best qualities because they’re too rare to be included in the consensus, and you’re now filtering for men who date women generically for social prestige rather than having intrinsic interest in you as an individual.  But no human can opt out of the power game entirely; the consequences of ostracism in a social species are lethal.

Also, the old joke about ‘Woman Upset that Men are Staring at her Breast Implants’ is, in this model, a perfectly rational set of behaviors on the face of it- you don’t need to invoke either dysphoria or hypocrisy.  The woman in question is not interested in actually provoking male behavior, she’s interested in communicating to others, often and especially other women, that she could if she wanted to.  She wants enough social power to feel safe, which is a basic and sensible primate drive.  It also demonstrates how this particular form of power both promotes and benefits from restrictive male gender roles, particularly as regards when and how to respond to women.  The more restrictive the roles, the safer it is to accumulate power without being exposed to undue risk of unwanted (or unsanctioned?) male agency, and in turn the more power will be leveraged by beauty as a force.  Feedback loops.  Depending on the specifics of culture and local social networks, it’s quite possible for an individual woman to experience the benefits of beauty primarily as higher prestige in her interactions with heterosexual women, and for the dynamic between herself and men as a group to skew more and more negative as she achieves beauty, without beauty itself being net-negative.

(Aside: notice how increasingly restrictive standards of sexual decorum in men in the 21st century correspond to a leveling-off of female workforce participation rates.  Libertine attitudes from the 60’s through the 90’s correlate with an expansion of economic power among women as an alternative to gendered beauty.)

One of the reasons that I like this model is that it’s written in the same alphabet as displays of traditional (i.e. political, military) power within formal hierarchies, displays of wealth, or even physical prowess- using this framework, beauty, wealth, and hierarchical power are all measured roughly by the number of people that will do what you ask them to.  It makes sense that there would be commonalities between them, such as elements of a seemingly counterproductive red queen race, or brinksmanship in which neither side wants to actually deploy their power.  

The differences are also real, and significant- because of the intrinsic dynamics of heterosexuality, beauty-as-a-face-of-power is ‘flat’, without tesselating hierarchies, and it doesn’t scale up indefinitely.  This gives it a more limited scope than being a CEO or a president with control over employees, and a much more limited scope than you get through wealth in a tangled economic system.  It also means that beauty is much less winner-take-all, meaning that almost all women benefit at the margins from pursuing beauty.  It also peaks early and then degenerates over time.  All these together in a dynamic mix I think help explain a lot of the complicated relationships that many women have with their physical appearance.

For example, this model makes it pretty easy to talk about why both women and men would be averse to a woman asking a guy out, even in This, The 21th Century- a woman who takes the initiative is in a sense forfeiting a game in which women demonstrate how powerful they are, and making herself less interesting at the margins during a stage of courtship where nobody has much information about the other party.

It also, I think, makes a lot of the old Incel discourse more legible, though it’s probably wiser to leave that particular one as an exercise for the reader.  And it’s worth noting also that physical strength shares a surprising symmetry with female attractiveness in this sense, even if explicitly leveraging the social power of physical intimidation is taboo in a lot of modern urban cultures.

Anyway, it’s a good little model.  Like all models, it’s wrong, but I think the epicycles here are modest and it's a useful way to interrogate a wide variety of phenomena.

[seiishindraws]

texture anon here! i want to know abt the ones you used in that iris defense squad drawing nd stuff, its the one i was originally thinking of

OKIE DOKIE here we go

I'll just show my process with a small section of the drawing at 100% zoom so its easier to see what exactly is happening. here's mizuki! look at her go! this is the lines and colours before i do anything cool to them. its nice, but a little flat

the first thing i did was add some chromatic aberration. you can do this manually pretty easily, but there's plenty of auto-actions on the csp assets store that can do it for you, look for those

its subtle but it adds a bit of visual interest to the linework i feel. you can make the chromatic aberration even more intense if you want by shifting the red and blue layers even further from each other.

i also merged the whole drawing onto a new layer (while still keeping the original layers intact) and made a gaussian blur layer with it, but i have the opacity so low the difference isnt that obvious lol, but it does give the drawing a soft glow.

NEXT i added a layer of perlin noise set to overlay mode to give the whole drawing a VERY subtle texture to it

to make a perlin noise layer, simple make a new empty layer on top of everything and use this:

NEXT i slapped a paper texture on top of everything and set it to screen mode! the one i used i got from TrueGrit Texture Supply's free sample pack (well i picked a specific layer out of the full texture), but you can pick any texture you like really, there's tons out there for free on the internet. again, at a low opacity, bc i want the textures to work together, rather than have one over-power the other.

NEXT i added little off-white speckles on multiple new layers varying opacity levels to add a little more texture. you could do this by hand, but i used speckle texture brushes that i bought from TrueGrit (TrueGrit is so fuckin good you guys)

i also used various screentone brushes while i was colouring for even MORE texture, but it should be obvious where i used those.

lastly, though it has nothing to do with the texture, i also added a gradient map on top at the end to correct the colours slightly.

I hope that helps!!

[fatuismooches]

this has been a recurring topic of discussion between my friend and, and seeing as you are The Most harbinger blog on here i think its only fair to share with the class but consider if you will: Harbinger youtuber AU

it started out as a joke with ASMRist dottore who usually livestreams his experiments but gets banned almost immediately every time. bro has like 100+ accounts created by his clones and posts weekly lobotomy asmrs where he either trauma dumps in every video or complains about his day. he Does Not understand what asmr actually is and just talks really close into the microphone so every time he speaks the audio sounds like its getting deepfried. one clone (webttore) runs a food review channel separate from the others where he just films himself eating in his lab in complete silence and just ends the videos with either a thumbs up or a thumb down

kfjghuierghejnfvsjdv i have a whole list of what the others channels would be like but i just needed to share with the class before the brainrot gets worse also hi smooches!!! i hope your day is going well! i probably shouldve started out with this but ive been following this account for a while now and its always made my day whenever i see a new post, whether its you answering asks or a new fic! thank you for keeping us fed with fatui content^^ okie byeeeee <3

PLEASE THIS IS ACTUALLY SO FUNNY IM GIGGLING I LOVE THE HARBINGER YOUTUBER AU 😭 Though... "ASMR Dottore" is not two words I thought I'd ever hear together LMAO omg he would breathe and somehow get banned 😭 (Scaramouche is the one mass reporting all his accounts) But no matter how much anyone tries he will come back, with more questionable erm... "content" he probably thinks he's so good at this ASMR stuff, in reality he is not. Which is a shame because if he just spoke normally he would be amazing at it. Probably complains about his co-workers and how uncooperative his test subjects are (hmm I wonder why? 😨) Bina and Pantalone come on there to bully him sometimes too. I imagine the only one who doesn't get banned is the child clone 😭 he has a lot of fans 😌 AND WEBTTORE? HE IS SO UNHINGED 💀💀 Thinking of him eating in that fancy suit has me giggling DOES HE TAKE OFF HIS MASK OR DOES HE EAT THROUGH THE PIECE THAT ISN'T COVERED?? WHAT DOES HE EAT? I have many questions (I would still donate my life savings for him)

Columbina would be like. One of those channels that posts a bunch of reels with a bunch of cute clothing, accessories, plushies, random trinkets n stuff... and the best websites and prices to get them at. Arlie's channel is, funnily enough, helpful to new parents or people taking care of kids in general because she posts about her rules in the orphanage, bedtimes, chores, etc 😭 Childe has a cooking channel 😌 bro wears an apron and eventually, not only is he hot but he also has amazing recipes that are low-effort too 😍

OKAY EWDBDE I'll stop now I'D LOVE TO HEAR YOUR HCS ON THE OTHER HARBINGERS' CHANNELS THOUGH!! AND HI!! ❤️❤️❤️ I hope your day is going well too :) I'm so glad you like my posts!! It means a lot for you to stick around for so long aww bejwdded🫶🫶

[anulithots]

So that could've been a mini-spiral, here's a thing that helped.

Uhmm... I'm going to tag @holdmyteaplease and @dancinginsepia, you all may like this <3

Context is that the others are in the "news watching phase" and I don't like my existence being political. (But sarcasm is great, that was the moral of the story.)

ANYWHO-

Specifically make a playlist to songs you've had the "nirvana lots of stimming" thing for. The ones that you've played over and over again for days and hummed along and danced to in the closet. Just those ones. Not any of the "good vibes ones" or even the "ooh character daydreams ones" just the ones you've actively felt the uber-happy-serotonin to. (Although in mine I added a few more melancholy ones that still give me happy chemicals, just make sure the most jammie jam ones are first.)

Mine's here because why not:

Okie dokie, that's part one.

The second part is the assigning a thought process the role of "caretaker". I story-fied this so that there are pixies that take residence in Anuli's head because of mycorrhizal symbiosis and only Naegi (the language processing, presentable one) can speak, so fae tells Anuli to use faer thoughts to give Squioo (the caretaker) a voice, and I really really want to include snippets of on-the-spot prose but maybe at the end.

Anywho, this "caretaker" thought process is there to soothe you whenever you need them. Mine calls me "bean" and says a lot of "I know, it's okay" and any help I need with doing the next task and not holding onto the spiral thoughts.

In fact! Thoughts become most damaging when they are OUR thoughts. They aren't! Most of the time, they are offered from that collection of subconscious childhood sponge stuff. You collected that, yes, but not by choice, so none of that is yours, they are only meant to help you when you need it.

And there was this one podcast my parents listened to in the car (long drives <3) and it talked about the four parts of the brain (Theoretically, they are nice guides, not foolproof, but nice. It makes me feel less alone - that was cheesy - in my head). They go like this:

The presentable one. Think "masking". This is your presentably and plan-making part of your brain that likes to analyze things (for the sake of future things, I think hyperfixations are more of a "three" part of the brain... more on that later.) Very future focused and will try to keep you out of trouble in society. You can call upon this one for any logic things for the future.

The Danger one. The one that probably got you in that spiral. They are that scared child that needs to hide and protect themselves and get away from the danger. They are only a scared little one, so it's best to call upon the Caretaker at that point to calm them down.

The inner child. Hyperfixations and the present moment has all these wonderful things and let's have some fun and oooh squirrel and this one lives off dopamine and having fun and stimulation every second of the day. Can get in trouble though. And this one will probably use jokes to make you feel better. Also a little one.

Then there's the caretaker.

I sttttoorrryyyfiiiieeeddd them! (They used to be one being and before they split and Floa got in trouble and now they are banished and Naegi is working on a plan to get unbanished and I don't even know if they will be cannon yet but like... I love them and they are the roles that I use.)

----

SNIPPETS

TW for the idea that certain minorities/other groups can be "parasites" and harm the majority. (Sorry, don't know what the term for this would be.)

"I don't want to think about that fallen fairy nonsense. In fact, say another word about them and I'll find one... I'll rip it;s eyes out so it can see what horror its bringing to all of my innocent dryads. "

Maidoe nodded. Nodded. Not a single shift in faer behavior. Did fae- was Maidoe like that too?

Does fae think that of me?

The container shattered. Static latched along my neck, tightening. My breath caught in the fibers. Perhaps my heart burst, it's sticky web spun around my head. Blood trickled from my ears. It exposed me to everyone, my eyes would fall into the puddles, warm and sticky and my sight fell beneath the pools of blood sinking beneath all the horrors I've ever-

"You okay? You went..." Maidoe tilted faer head, "Well, you're staring at your feet like they've wronged you."

I'm a fallen fairy. I'm a fallen fairy. I'm a fallen fairy. I'm a fallen fairy I'm drowning I'm drowning

dying.

dying.

dying.

"F-fine" I breathed.

"You sure?"

Just that word was an arc, a million stories, all that I had left, any more and I would burst at the seams.

I nodded.

Maidoe smiled and turned back to the Mother Fairy, the one who- and fae was -

How could fae be two things? That's not moral ambiguity, that's a juxtaposition and a dichotomy and tonal dissonance and it didn't add anything it didn't make narrative sense-

'You're spiraling.'

I growled. I know that Naegi, I know, I'm sorry, I know, and it's not-

'Squioo could help. Fae's done so before, and we can have us fumbling in front of important figures, just think of what that would do to our reputation-'

Fibers wormed around my spine, snaked around my neck, pulled until it bled, swelled-

Squioo could fix it?

What do I do? How do I do it? Is it difficult because I can't, I'm sorry, it's not- but I'll try to- I can't promise-

My scalp throbbed. I would've pressed my hands to my head and tugged at roots and yet my fingertips remained by my sides.

'Just give faer access to your thoughts so fae can speak to you, since you think in... word-ish pictures?'

Stories. I'm sorry. Did I mess it up already? Predestined fate of the villain and I will burst and that will mess everything up and this is nothing I haven't heard before and it was so small what do I do what do I do-

'Just imagine one of those... how would you phrase it? Mentor figures? Except more of the subtle sort. A caretaker. Someone who will soothe you from this spiral, imagine a few words and Squioo will gain access from there.'

I stiffened. The whispers of a forgotten lullaby ringing in my ears, of broken windchimes and fae was hurt and angry and does Kamari think like that now-

'Try a sentence to start with.'

You're okay, little on- oh I- what if it doesn't work? Am I doing it right? What if it's- I'm sorry. I'm sorry.

'Continue.'

You'll be okay, Anuli, I promise. We'll have a happy ending where we sing to the stars that we are free. It will be wonderous. Are you cold? Does that feel better?

If you wanted to stay you wouldn't have broken-

'Hello love. We'll take this one note at a time, okay?'

I bit the inside of my mouth, the sobs scratching at the confines. Okay

'Can you focus on the insides of your nose for me? And when you're ready, take a deep breath, whenever you're ready. Okay?'

I'll burst.

'That's okay. Do you want to try your palms instead? Can you watch those?'

My fingers twitched at my sides. Like this?

'Yes, very good love. Do your palms feel cold, hot?'

Hot and twitchy.

'That's alright love. Just watch it for now, any sensations?'

Yes.

'Can you tell me about them?'

I breathed out, hitched and shaky. They have... sparkles? Waves of almost wind but thicker, soft and... bouncy... like moss? But clouds?

'Cloudy moss must be very soft.'

A spurt of laughter mixed with swollen sobs. It's floaty.

'That's wonderous love. We'll watch it together, okay?'

Okay.

The fibers and blood fell though my fingertips, leaving me a washed-out cloth, left in the rain for moons, and oh how hollow and wonderous the sunlight was.

Squioo?

'Yes?'

... You're wonderous. Thank you.

'Aw. Thank you love.'

[livecharliereaction]

gonna be a long ahh post

ill try to see if theres anything strange for all of them but i dont remember all alibis n circumstances etc im using the red truths + question arc tip screen oki thats all i have Well i have my liveblogs too but that doesnt seem useful. first ep didnt have red truths yet but im quite sure it had to have been natsuhi or maria so

this was natsuhi + krauss + eva + hideyoshi + rudolf + kyrie

rosas definitely weird in ep2 i very vividly recall her BEING in that chapel too but i could be misremembering that part. though beatrice was there

this whole ordeal was a little strange i wish i remembered who exactly witnessed her bcs i feel like it wasnt just natsuhi n servants... Kyrie definitely saw her yes? I dont know what to make of it. What a cute outfit though shes so cute

also these mentions on shannon n kanon ep2 descs Awh

kanons key or servant involvement seeing as none of the others were first 6

kanon n jessica couldve killed each other Why? Who knows But someone carried kanons body out

"no one is hiding (regarding jessicas room)" STop i wouldve said that too im just like him i cant diss his abilities anymore.

Oh but also "kanon was killed in this room" =/= "kanon was killed in this room at that time" Im thinking about the scene where he "reappears" again i think its been said theres no disguise stuff so maybe

am i confusing the scenes because "theres no corpse" What happened in the doctors room???? when they saw him come back and bury his fingers to that wound i wouldve said he mightve died at that moment but then whats with the corpse. Girl

i miss her so much shes so funny "You are incompetent" in red is crazy

Beato:(.......

rosa had the keys yeahhhhhh i dont exactly remember Why i thought she was weird at the time but it was probably her. She was running around w the rifle too Well thats all for ep2 anyway

wtf even was charumi3 that was evas time to shine yes

Its definitely dead

None of the six committed suicide! hmm the weird linked one i remember it Though. Isnt "The six died instantly" incorrect in kinzos case if he was already dead... Since its a separate statement it doesnt have to refer to those six yes?? So maybe one of them besides kinzo didnt die instantly... Like battler suggested w a chain murder or one person going around to make up the chained rooms

Then theyd have a key too... girl i dont remember what eva was doing at this time also

at that point eva was supposedly in her room w a headache while witch eva was killing them so yeah doesnt look great for eva That servant things still possible too + rosa might as well have killed maria though idk who killed rosa in that case

eva did not kill hideyoshi... servant thing still strong and also wtf was kyrie thinking here anyway might as well blame her n then say eva killed kyrie but i forgor where eva was here again oopsie

"No life forms other than humans have any connection to this game" seems like a witch denying phrase but ok i guess its not a life form then

Lol. Once again kinzo thing makes this not matter... Though there go all my servants dawg maybe that was only for first twilight then

that is worrying. Do you think kanon n shannons names being pseudonyms affects the red truth. "shannon is dead" What if shannon is the idea of her servitude to the family and she threw it away for some reason and that way theres a Sayo who is killing people and doesnt really break the truths "shannon is dead" OR "there are no more than 18 humans on this island" All that goes for kanon too im just pretending that i didnt spoil myself his real name haha. Well kanon even more so since they made him appear and all but that couldve been jessicas delusion too...

she used to have so much fun that beato...

also even if eva was confirmed to not be involved in nanjos death that doesnt negate she couldve done well.everything else heart

thought about "Because of your sin, people die." a lot yesterday... The part about it not being about or with beatrice is of course very confusing and weird But yeah i cant even guess except apparently hes the reason the game exists? Or at least the reason it goes on or more specifically "cause of the eternal torture between us"

I dont understand how it could be about anything else BUT beatrice but ok. Maybe he was mean to maria like ange. But maria was literally 3 years old at that point... I guess he left the family 6 years ago but im having a terrible time trying to understand whats wrong with that really I guess asumu isnt blood related to him afterall but it cant be this great big sin beefing with rudolf u know. Id think his comebacks the reason the cerenomy was seen fit to be carried out (thinking about the amount of people) but angie wouldve normally been there instead of him anyway so the amount of people is the same and its over 14 anyway (13 sacrifices + whoevers imitating the epitaph) so i dont really understand blinks

i like when he goes Ah ngagh nnnghhh aaghh...!!! this vn loves to make people roar also They do it all the time. battler n beato do it the most but eva and many others always roaring too

also??? according to the wiki they didnt use red truth at all in ep3 until this point thats crazy i guess beato really WAS more careful about it

oh ange i miss u

i cant even tell what the first ones about theres no game record in ep4 tips how annoying <- doesnt remember at all what happened. Well ange was there uhh.

nvm its definitely about this one. I seriously remember nothing there was so much ange ange ange it was all eyes on ange.... I might reread my liveblogs

OH YEAH it was ppl supposedly witnessing kinzo killing everyone. Although uh "all ... acknowledged the presence of kinzo" Thats very different from "kinzo was there n killed everyone"... It couldve been in spirit or even if his corpse was there. Also last ones crazy u can just change that well i guess they were counting a corpse then

thats crazy confusing combined with knoxs rule about no accidents... what is left...

STOP. THERE GO BOTH OF MY SUSPECTS STOP IT

none of these negate kanon n rosa culprit yeah?

omfg wtf theres an image limit let me do the rest in another post

[hojlundaise]

So I was going through the blog you don't use anymore and

• now I'm sad bc I miss Ander, Juan and Nemanja Vidic again (it's okay it's not your fault I always miss them anyway)

°(also don't u think licha is kinda like a vidic regen? Idk maybe it's just me)

°Juan would have LOVED Casão and Chris

• DAVID BECKHAM HAS A TUMBLR ?!?!?!?!!?!!?!?!?!!?!? (He's not active though 🥲)

• i want Dave back in his good distribution era

Okie byeeeee ❤

ahh hellooo 😚

dskfjafdf i wanted to keep my old blog around as a separate archive but then my dumbass forgot about how its impossible to switch main and side blogs so now it just haunts me wherever i go

yessss i miss the spanish trio together i was a huge fan of ander and juan they loved the club so much and they kept me sane during those times 🫠 also i think they had more videos back then? of them playing games and stuff their dynamic was chefs kiss (now we have some chemistry back but no vids 😒) missing them more when our midfield is constantly doing their disappearing act help us

and yesss licha also reminds me of vidic (dont get me started on vida he is my most fav player ever my goat my serbian uncle the light of my life as a kid etc etc) im sat here fanning myself seeing them put their bodies on the line to defend love them so so sosososo much such an important figure in the team (licha and varane partnership akin to vida and rio too i feel like im reliving my childhood)

wait beckham has a tumblr i forgot sjkldh hes truly one of the founding tumblrinas in football

[machathecat]

PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE RAMBLE ABOUT KRYTIS HER CHARACTER DESIGN LOOKS SO COOL

OKI DOKIE :DDD

FIRST IN FIRST HER CHARA DESIGN IS INSPIRED OF CHARLOTTE/MOLDY FROM HFJONE (JUST WANNA CREDIT THAT)

OOOK SO THE SORTA HORNS ON HER ARE BASED ON THIS DISEASE RABBITS WERE THEY GROW THOSE SORT OF HORNS TOO (HOWEVER I CHANGED HOW IT WORKED A LOT FOR INTERESTING STORY REASONS) SHE WASN'T BORN WITH IT THOUGH, SHE WORKED AS A CAVE EXPLORER AND THEN GOT IT CAUSE OF THE HUMID AIR AND MUSHROOMS (YA KNOW STUFF LIKE THAT) AND IT GROWS OVER TIME

WHAT IT DOES TO HER (IN THE ACTUAL STATE OF THE DISEASE) IS THAT SHE GOT A 24/7 HEADACHE , ALL THE INFECTED PART FEELS NUMB AND PAINFUL , SHE CAN'T WALK ON HER INFECTED LEG A LOT (WHY SHE AS A CANE) AND JUST OVERALL FUCK UP HER HEALTH A LOT

SO ABOUT HER SHE LIVE WITH ARSENIC , SHE'S TECHNICALLY WAY LESS OF A PSYCHO , VERY SWEET AND CALM AND PATIENT , ALL THE OPPOSITE OF ARSENIC , BUT IF YOU DARE TRYING TO MESS UP WITH THEIR PARTNER THEY'LL KILL YOU THE MOST VIOLENT WAY IMAGINABLE

SHE'S TRYING HER BEST TO LEARN ASL FOR ARSENIC BUT ITS KINDA HARD WITH HER NUMB ARM AND MEMORY ISSUES BUT SHE'S TRYING HER BEST :3

SHE'S A PRO AT ART AND TRY TO LEARN IN TO ARSENIC BUT HE ISN'T PROGRESSING A LOT SINCE EVERYTIME HE MESS UP HE TEAR APART THE WHOLE PAPER , BUT ARSENIC TRY THEIR BEST TOO X3

SHE DOESN'T PLAY VIDEO GAME CLOSE TO AS MUCH THAT ARSENIC BUT SOMETIMES ENJOY A LITTLE MINECRAFT AND SHE EVEN MADE A SURVIVAL WORLD WITH ARSENIC :D

TIME FOR DA RANDOM DETAILS

SHE LISTEN TO ALMOST ONLY 8D SONGS , THEY'RE ABSOLUTELY ADDICT TO CHOCOLATE MILK (LEGIT BARELY DRINK ANYTHING OTHER THAT THAT) SHE'S AFRAID OF THE DARK BUT WON'T ADMIT IT , ALSO GOT CLAUSTROPHOBIA (WICH HAD TO MADE HER QUIT CAVE EXPLORING) SHE WORK AS A RETAIL EMPLOYEE , SHE'S A CAT PERSON AND IS PRETTY MUCH DEAD FROM HER RIGHT EAR

[c-kiddo]

I think the M9 are just one big nd queer friend group (yes this is because irl me and my best friends make a purely ND + queer friend group) and I love thinking of how they would adjust to the comfort of that over time. Like leaving stim toys out to share (I think jester would have a big horde to share), using each other to casually pressure stim, automatically adjusting for each other's sensory issues and stuff. I also think they would all know sign language, I hc Molly would have learned and then taught yasha (who totally goes nonverbal), and beau and Caleb would have learned on their own (Caleb because he's autistic like yasha and beau because she wants to understand her loved ones). I think cad would have invented a different basic sign language with his siblings or something....sibling bond you know? I see cad, Caleb and Yasha as like. The super autistic trio. Caleb got diagnosed young and taught them about it and cad is like oh there's a name for that in my family nobody questions it....*goes back to organizing tea* and Yasha would be like. Oh I'm not a freak for that I thought I was just clinically weird....*goes and sits in a corner and doesn't say anything for 3 days*. Jester and fjord are absolutely an adhd t4t bi couple I don't think that needs an explanation. Beau is adhd too for sure and maybe also autistic. Veth and Molly idk I could see veth as any combo and Molly is. Molly. Maybe the token nt idk lol I was never that attached to his character lol. Ok that's it for now but I literally think of nd m9 all the time like every day, campaign 2 is my second biggest spin so these are my favorite headcanons to read and think about 🙂

wa yea,, tmn totally are queer + nd friendgroup solidarity. also i think they'd share some stimtoys, but also have their own too, like jester (token rich friend) buys them cool ones, colour coordinated and everythign :-3 she bought cad a chewy necklace thats purple n a gemstone like the amethyst on his staff and he thinks its so epic cool, now his hair doesnt get crunchy from chewing, and his sleeves dont get weird-smelling.

also ye!!! they all sign for sure. theres a bit of a mix-up in the beginning tho because some of them only know certain signing, especially cad.. his family use their own one based on sylvan signing (headcanon they speak sylvan at home too, and giant, then common after those two) and things made up by him and his siblings too. caleb probably knew a zemnian version of signing but its similar enough to wildemount common signing that its ok, plus he's good at memorising and learning the new things anyway. him and beau also end up learning sylvan signing to help communicate with cad if he cant talk and sounds are too much. also for sure think molly n yasha have some signing variation they used, though maybe they made it up together, especially when molly showed up and couldn't speak yet. and it just went on from there and ended up being very useful. also i think molly goes between not being able to speak and speakign 100mph, like often its one or the other lol. (headcanon molly had the fantasy magic version of a traumatic brain injury, caused by souls leaving and being dead and things. fantasy magic, astral sea, brain attacking, things)

also agree abt caleb having known he's autistic for a loooong while, diagnosed as a kid because he arranged everything into rows and only wanted to read like 1 book over and over and hid from noises. yasha definitly just went through life thinking she's weird,, i mean, canon. lol. and ye!! thats a cooll idea abt cads family having a name for it.. he's like, oh, this is [word for it in sylvan or somthing], me and belle and my mam are it (probably more or all of th clays but ,thats jsut an example).

okie okei, last bit. bullet points. speed round akjdna then bed time. adhd t4t fjorester so true. i think veth has nd girl swag for sure, but im not sure between adhd and autism, besides other things bc i could totally diagnose tmn with all sorts of neurodivergencies not just those two. (caleb ocd moments, beau bpd momence, cad quiet type bpd, if you may, as a treat)...... also nt molly is a funny idea 2 me. i think he's nd for sure. not autistic, he's too spontaneous n theres nothing in canon rly i can turn to autism..... so, i shall have a think. definitely brainweird for sure. oh ! oh molly psychosis haver for sure. molly cad and caleb all psychotic. euhh h yeah i think thats all this is long ramble now i should go to bed

(same hat @ cr2 being 2nd biggest special interest hellyea )

[cupcraft]

is it odd in some way that something just, didn't click with me anymore when I opened Tommy and Philza's streams? I'm not sure how to explain it and maybe it's because the situation is still new/ being cleared and ofc it's never good to spam them about situations they're not involved in but in a way, I really do hope they address this or say something that nods to the situation.

I've always been SBI + co all the way and ik they're not Dream nor is the situation about them but they're still associated with Dream and that frustrates me because 1. knowing well that there could and could not be potentially an instance where they address his actions 2. still associate + work with him despite everything if potential Dream SMP S2 happens. I want to still be able to appreciate and support them but it also stings knowing that they still have connections with Dream (with the Tommy lore potentially coming too, the convenience of it is way too uncanny), m sorry if this came out long rambling mess and if I didn't make sense in the slightest, I'm trying to enjoy Tommy and Philza's streams along with Wilbur's lovejoy tour but it feels so odd and I hope everyone's okie in the very least, also you as well!

yeah i am also finding it very difficult. its understandable. i really hope they distance themselves and stuff though im not expecting an announcement. i also dont really want the lore now it feels too tainted i can barely think about how im going to reckon with the fics i am and have been writing either. i need space from those things and like other anons have said we just need to be patient. take a break, dont doomscroll, drink water, eat food, and relax. we will learn more as things go on. engage in other interests if you have them <3

[angeloftrumpets]

Hiii ^_^/ I was wondering if you had a back/story for your S/I(s) with any of your F/O(s)? I'm mostly curious, and only if you'd like to share :3c

HIIIIIIII okie this is going to probab;y be a very jumbled adnd maybe confusing and long post bc AA but i will try to make it understandable and write it before my ride gets here and picks me UP OKIE (edit i have been adding onto this post on my shift since like 1 am my time so i apologize if its confusing my work laptop is weird ANYWAYS)

I only have one s/i aside from just straight?? up me?? (or a backstory if that makes sense) and thats neph or, the cat/shark guy (Funfact!!! neph came from a convo with toonie, ill explain a bit below but he is cursed to not have a name and since hes a Nephilim toonie decided to start calling him neph, as like a shorter version of it! (thanks toon ! :3 💛)

to begin obviously he is a Nephilim, i hc six also is one since i remembered my mom telling me something about the Nephilim teaching humanity about technology i dont know where it is said about that but thats where that hc comes from!! they are both (neph and six) are kind of a 'different' kind of Nephilim as in they are only related with technology and were apart of the ones that showed humanity technology, so example both him and six both have the ability to go through the television and when it is invented computers/phones etc, that just kinda explains the general basis of how he works the cat tail/shark stuff is cause im cringe and think that combo looks cool and that he can shapeshift (As i imagine most nephilims can?) and since he mostly exist on a digital plane no one is going to question if they see some weird combination of animal on some animated program if he were to appear in it even though he looks like that physically also. due to the fact that he is a Nephilim, he obviously isnt liked by most beings from the heavens since he is a product of a human and a fallen angel and was cursed by the big g himself to not have a name nor be seen physically by humanity, which can get pretty lonely and make someone weird, he has a long history of being chased out by various angels that catch him lurking by (he likes to hang out around the garden of eden, thats where him and toonie met) ALSO if we are gonna get specific michael DOESNT like him and has definitely nearly killed him like twice. hes welcome in hell tho :))) neph doesnt hold any hard feelings twards angels for not being fond of him considering what he is, but not all of them are like that. obviously, toon being one of them (or i guess archangel gabriel if we are being literal but i dont want to confuse alt g and him so i will say toon)

when they both first met toon was definitely a little anxious at first considering hes heard of Nephilims/his peers going after them/ and the flood in general (by the way, i dont remember what ep it is but i hc when alt g tells noah something will be joining him on the boat it neph was apart of that (specifically six and neph, and some type of alternate, since the flood also wiped out Nephilims he had to keep some alive to help him) anyways back to what i was saying sjhfdfh they ended up becoming close and when toon isnt off doing angel or messenger duties hes usually with neph in the garden of eden (same goes with if neph isnt doing something for alt g or something along those lines) after the events of overthrone (if we go by the toonb/riel sand tomb theory i know some people think that was jesus or atleast my roomate hcs this so ) neph wasnt told about what had happened to him and was confused why he was no longer able to find him, noticing that there was definitely something very wrong with the heavens (due to alt gs actions yk) he ends up eventually figuring out what had happened and in a weird time/universe fucky way is able to get toonb/riel out, since its no longer safe at all for toon to exist (and also alt gab doesnt know that he has escaped) he basically is forced to exist within the realm of media in a strange way (BEGINNER BIBLEEEE HEHEHEHEHEHEHHEHEHEEHEHE) though this isnt 100% set in stone and it changes but i like to think it would be cool if he is able to exist within the realms of technology as some digital angel OKIE i am SO SO SO SORRY FOR SUCH A LONG POST i got so giddy and excited at seeing this ask and have been trying my best to figure out how to answere it THANK YOU SO MUCHF OR ASKING ME!!!!!!

[tylerxrbtwhp]

Idk what im doing, going to random people's account and sending random questions BUTT.

i have a fewwww questions cuz i saw that reblog where u said that anybody can come to your and ask yada yada SO im here!!

What name/names should i/we call you?

What is your fav color?

What is your fav food?

What is your fav drink?

What is your fav animal?

What is your personality type?

What do you like to do in your free time?

Do you have a pet?

Do you love rocks?

What fandoms are you in?

Mom or dad?

What do you want to be when you grow up? / What is your job?

If you like reading, what genre is your fav?

If you like art, what is your fav type?

If you like music, what is your fav genre?

What is your fav school subject?

Do you have siblings / a sibling?

What is your fav flower?

What is your fav weather?

Do you have a fav writer? If so, who?

If you like/love Genshin Impact then who is/are your fav genshin characters?

By your posts, you seem to like Marvel! Who is/are your fav Marvel and DC character?

By your pfp, who is your fav FNAF character?

Do you have a fav celebrity? If so, who?

What would you do if you changed gender for a day and everybody treated you as that gender?

If you like travelling then where would you like to go?

Which country do you hate the most?

Which country do you love the most?

Are you calm or the opposite?

Do you love eating?

Ohmagawd THIRTY QUESTIONS AND I OMG i didnt even realize 😇

damn dude chill out [jkjk] 😭

oki so here 1. Tyler or Xanical 2. I got 3 actually, Blue, Green and Purple though i like blue the most 3. Nothing really, I can take anything except pork and a few other stuff 4. Water, Coffee or Tea, idk 5. Cats and Horses! 6. i THINK its in my bio? idk but its ISTJ and specifically ISTJ-A 7. Whatever i want 💀But srsly, reading or gaming, either 8. Yeah actually 9. OH HELL YES THERE ARE SO MANY DIFFERENT TYPE OF ROCKS!!! omg especially those sparkly ones!! I have two rocks on my desk, they were shiny when i first picked them up but unfortunately the shine didnt stay 😔 10. Theres quite a few 😭Marvel, FNAF, Football/Soccer, Creepypasta, Genshin Impact, One Piece, MHA (I dont even watch anime 😭), Countryhumans (I despise countryhumans/countryballs ships.) and uhh prolly Minecraft and Red Dead Redemption 2 11. Dad. (Tho i LOVE LOVE LOVE MY MOTHER SO MUCH TOO!! i was actually debating the other day whether i love mom or dad more but dad always wins besides she has her son 🙄) 12. tbh an officer, specifically a NAVY ones 13. There are a few like Horror, Mystery, Science Fiction etc etc but imo Fiction always wins 🔥 14. I dont like making arts that much 😭But seeing others make magnificent arts is always so cool!! 15. Rock or Country, cant decide 16. HISTORY AHH 🔥🔥🔥 17. yup 18. the classic, roses! 19. Rainy or cloudy, like a weather when everything is calm and stuff 20. Tbh i dont have one, every writer is unique in their own way and everyone's writing is so majestic that i cant even choose one 😭 21. ohoohoho ik ik!! Pierro, The Jester. My always no. 1 though im getting obsessed with Zhongli and Neuvillitte these days! 22. Iron man, Tony Stark my beloved no. 1 and i'd go for Heath Ledger's Joker for DC 23. IF IT ISNT OBVIOUS ENOUGH- 😭😭(no offense) Its Springtrap or Burntrap, cant decide but their the same person the basically William Afton! 24. IT'S ROBERT DOWNEY JUNIORRRR!!!!!! ahem. 25. I seriously dont know 😭 26. Prolly Russia, Britain, Germany or Switzerland, maybe Norway but Russia's my main goal!! 27. Israel. 28. My own country!!! 29. The ppl around me say that im calm so yeh 30. Idk im in th middle of the scale 🔥 ____________________________________________ DONEEEE yes. its 05:23 yo 🔥

[bye-bye-firefly]

Okie! I’m going to try to think of a request! I once again do not know what this request shall be. I’m going to look through some of your notes for ideas.

Alright, maybe for the purposes of making characters filled with Sleep Deprivation, (because I’ve found that I really like how you write sleepiness, promise next time I’ll try to ask for something different!) there could be a sleepover. And there can be Miu with all her little inventions and one sec. Gonna look at that one poll thingy with the tables.

Found it! There could be Kokichi and Kiibo too. And they have a lot of those cool candles with really obscure names there for some reason? Maybe they just bought them or made them or maybe they’re just There and no one knows why. I dunno??

Also I think it should be noted that I went and googled stuff about the late 2000s and I found out cereal straws are a thing??? Like straws that you eat??? I did not know about this. It was very shocking. The cocoa krispies ones kinda look like those chocolatey stick things that have soft chocolate insides, can’t remember what they’re called, and it made me really crave those.

Anyway, I think that’s it! Sleepover ft. Candles. If it doesn’t seem fun, feel free not to write it. Not like there’s much of a point if there’s no enjoyment being gained! Also, are there like any things in particular that you’ve been interested in writing about? I’ve already asked about your favorite things but like I wanted to ask more questions about stuff you like.

(Btw, thank you for the reassurances that you wouldn’t yell at me, it did actually make me feel better!)

nothing is really hitting me right now regarding how to go with this idea but maybe it'll hit me later. for right now i dont think ill go with it BUT im glad you asked anyway! its always good to ask ^_^ plus i might return to it and make a version of it

and stuff ive been interested in writing...well as always sleep deprivation and eventual sleep (which is basically hurt/comfort which is WHYYY hurt/comfort is my favourite trope. this threw my friends for a loop when we did like a friend quiz for funsies but to be so fair to them i did include sleepy boys as an option which i threw in as a trick answer) but also i just love horror. i like writing unsettling shit yo which is why in recent years all ive been writing is horror. but even in my early days as a fic writer i was writing horror like propaganda is a drama and a horror fic but its not really psychological and its not as overbearing as some of my newer work (some of which is also. not published yet...)

other stuff . other stuff i like to write. trying desperately to remember all the things i like to write. uh. illness. sick fics are good. its why i had like multiple chapters in nameless have either kokichi or shuichi be sick

okay heres the thing is im obsessed with a few concepts and im going to just ramble under the cut about those things and these are things that like form everything i write and create and think about and how i see the world OKAY? okay

so the first thing has to do with tlou1 and it kind of goes hand in hand with the illness but only KIND OF. so you know that joel gets hurt and then goes into a bit of a Coma while he recovers but i dont give a shit about that i care about ONE THING. joel gets hurt right. ellie pulls him up. and hes STILL fighting. hes STILL pushing himself for HER. and she is this little kid and she can barely hold her own but shes gonna fucking try so you have joel stumbling through while hes losing blood and. theres this one part. if you remember this. where joel stumbles and almost falls over and ellie goes, "here, lean on me." and he goes "No." and she goes "well can you walk?" and he goes "Yes!" and shes like "then fucking walk!" and she lets him walk even though he can barely walk in a straight line let alone stand up because they respect and trust each other but she is still obviously scared that shes about to lose him and hes scared that hes about to lose her and i love that bit of the game so much. the way joel is barely able to move and do anything and therefore you as the player are barely able to do anything to help ellie and you feel so helpless and she can STILL hold her own and you are STILL a team and you are FIGHTING so FUCKING HARD and youre NEARLY THERE!!! and joel ONLY lets go when they are safe. he only falls over when he knows they are safe. he physically cannot go on any longer even though he wants to. THAT is a scene and concept ive written privately for like my own characters and even for nameless though that scene was never popped into the story. i like seeing gravely injured characters fight so hard for the people they care about, and then i love being able to see the people they fought hard for scared that they might not make it. theres so much care and devotion and LOYALTY in that and i love using it for like parent-child duos or even ships like. the Versatility. this is everything to me. and like. who WOULDNT do that for someone they care about? who WOULDNT risk their life to save someone they love? who WOULDNT hold on for a little longer for them?

okay next thing. this is something that comes from tlou2 which i dont believe youve actually seen because penny hasnt played it completely . ..? i think ? ? i havent caught up with the streams...but anyway im gonna talk in vague terms about this but basically. ive talked about this in a note before i know i have. but theres this whole long conversation between joel and ellie that ends with ellie being like "i shouldve died in that hospital. my life wouldve fucking MATTERED." and joel tells her, "if god gave me a second chance in that moment...i would do it ALL again." and when you go through tlou2 you know just what that means. its all the pain. and despite everything, he would do it again and he says this to her face when she is at her angriest, her most bitter, and she says. and this has ALWAYS made me cry and im like tearing up thinking about it she says "i dont know if i can forgive you for that. but...i would like to try." and ever since i saw that scene i can say for certain that has like changed me fundamentally like this has shaped me and tlou1 has shaped me. its just. god. GOD!!! I DON'T KNOW IF I CAN FORGIVE YOU FOR THAT. BUT...I WOULD LIKE TO TRY. DO YOU GET IT??? im loinsg it im losing my MIND its the love its the capacity for forgiveness for something that to you is only unforgivable and THATS what tlou2 is about as well people may tell you its the revenge is bad game but its ALWAYS about forgiveness and they dont get it like i do and its tragic and at the same time provides closure and its bittersweet and its that bittersweetness that i love and i love writing scenes and stories that are essentially just i dont know if i could ever forgive you for that, but i would like to try. we hurt each other so much and so often we hurt the people we love unintentionally and its so hard to forgive and sometimes it takes a long time to get to the point where we can. and sometimes we cant forgive. sometimes we never get to that point. but i think its beautiful to try for someone you love too much to lose. i think its really beautiful.

and finally. this goes kind of hand in hand with everything ive written here. im just fixated on the idea of fighting through people or something destructive right like this person is fighting so hard through something covered in blood or muck and the dust settles and theyre shaky and they see the person they were fighting so hard for and they just relax and gather them up in their arms and its the knowledge that theyre okay, its okay............not having to fight anymore is what its all about at the end of the day. and that also leads to eepies

but at the end of the day its all about love really. everything adds up to effort and love

[lovingleehaechan]

I adore you. - Jung Jaehyun (Part III)

genre: fluff, angst(?)

word count: 1.6k

warnings: i honestly don’t remember anymore :(

a/n: i’ve been recently dabbling again with writing so this is just me filling in a few bits, please enjoyy and hold on a little longer! their story is only beginning hehehe 

with all my love, summer x

It’s been a long day for Jaehyun, too long for it to just be called one day. 

His mom was constantly at him during the morning, asking how college had been and what it’s been like living alone without them. The usual stuff mom’s normally ask when they haven’t spoken with their child for too long. Even though all she wanted to do was make sure that he was eating and getting on fine on his own she couldn’t help but be worried. He was her child, her baby after all. 

Jaehyun answered all her questions with patience but the longer it went on, the longer he felt as if he was being dragged over the floor. Don’t get it twisted, he loves his mom so much but some days when he felt more down than usual talking to her seemed more like a chore. He didn’t want to sound ungrateful either, she always made sure he had enough side dishes in his fridge to keep him going for the next two weeks until his next visit home or her next visit to his apartment. Jaehyun wanted the phone call to end quicker than usual but it seemed as if she had so many questions to ask him, as if they haven’t talked in a while. It was unusual to say the least, he always sent her a text in between the days or if he’s reminded of her or their family. 

He asked her if there was anything happening in the family but it seemed as though she dodged the question, almost pretending as if the question was never asked. As soon as his mom did that, he just knew he had to visit the coming weekend. It cannot be delayed if his mom was behaving this way. Something was going on, he was just out of the loop. He finally had enough and ended the phone call informing her that he was visiting this weekend. She was caught off guard but she agreed nonetheless. 

He didn’t know whether or not to be worried about the phone call. It was quite unusual of her to behave in that way. Despite his insides bothering him, he tried his best to distract himself. So that’s where y/n came in. He sends a text your way, “are you busy?” he asked.

“Not really, just mindlessly scrolling through tiktok, nothing new,” you text. “What’s up?” 

“Just not in the mood to be at home, wanna go for a picnic?” he suggested. 

He knew you wouldn’t say no, you couldn’t resist the thought of just being outside with nature. You would probably bring a book and your speakers. Jaehyun would take care of the rest. 

“You got me at ‘not wanting to be at home’, I’ll be ready in two hours? Is that enough time for you?” y/n replied.

“That’s perfect, you don’t need to bring anything okay? I’ll have everything sorted. Text you if I finish earlier than expected.” Jaehyun answered. 

“Okie dokie, I’ll be here.” 

His heart skipped. With those mere words, you’d already made him a fumbling mess. Can you imagine what you would do to him if you were his? 

If only that was the case. 

Jaehyun quickly shook his head, as if he could get rid of his thoughts that quickly. A loud sigh escaped his lips as he got up from his comfortable seat. He should get ready before the sun sets. You both loved to watch it. The sun setting was one of those things that could help you think you can start over again, like if you failed an exam or when small things build up into a big, disgusting pile that you don’t even want to go near at, it helps you gather those thoughts and make you realize that you can do it. Just don’t procrastinate. 

While he created a mental list in his head, he repeated the things he needed on a loop. From the basic things like blankets, to snacks and little post-its and pens- you know, just in case you were inspired to write something. You always had a knack for coming up with things on your spontaneous adventures, even just as simple as a picnic. Jaehyun knew you, but every time he thought he did, you always did something unexpected. As if you suddenly convince yourself “oh, I’ve been wanting to do that, fuck it”. 

Before his head went into a spiral, he physically shook his head and gathered the items in question and packed them in the car. He smiled slightly at the thought of spending this time with you. Who knew he would end up falling for his best friend? 

Apparently, he was the one who was convinced he would never fall in love with you. Well because, you were you and Jaehyun was Jaehyun. 

What a great reason for not to fall in love with someone right? Just because they’re them, you couldn’t or- you wouldn’t. Funny how life comes around in a full circle. 

Jaehyun sent you a message to say that he was on his way before driving towards your apartment. 

You came out of the front door just as soon as he arrived by your complex. He peeked his head slightly, you were wearing those favourite joggers he loved on you. The simple black one with the white strip on the side plastered with the brand name. They hugged your legs so well, he knew you were comfortable in them and it made you that bit extra ‘quirky’. 

Jaehyun unlocked the door, not saying a word. He smiled at you as you sat by the passenger side. You nodded in acknowledgement and smiled in return. 

The silence remained but the atmosphere was comforting. He drove you both to your spot. 

                          ____________________________________

Y/n helped Jaehyun take stuff out from the back. You were surprised how much he prepared in such a short amount of time. It really made you think about things a little. Here was your best friend doing these things a boyfriend normally would. Could your boyfriend do the same thing? The same things as Jaehyun does. Or say the things he knows would comfort your uneasy heart.

With a sigh, you settled yourself on the blanket, placing another around your shoulders. 

“You okay?” he asked.

“Just thinking, you know.” you replied.

“Like what?” curious. 

“Like just how I feel. The things I’m doing, are they the right thing? Could I be doing something else right now that would make me feel like it’s worthwhile?” 

He laughed slightly.

“Same,” he began and paused.

“Is that really all you could tell me, Jung Jaehyun? Same?” you exclaimed. 

This time he heartily laughed at your reaction. 

“Can you chill for a sec,” he giggled, “you didn’t give me enough time to say the rest of it.” 

You made a guilty face and gestured for him to go on. 

“I guess it’s a normal thing to think about when you come to this point though, no? We’re still young, we still have time to make some mistakes. Of course we won’t get everything right but that’s part of life.” 

“I guess so. It’s hard to follow that kind of advice. I tell myself the same thing but no matter how much I try and drill it in my head, it doesn’t stick.” you said.

“It’s as if I just refuse to listen even though I know it’ll ease my worries. Maybe I need someone to calm me down in person too, rather than being said all the time to me- or texted.” 

He nodded, urging you to continue. 

“Things like this, you know? A simple sunset picnic. It doesn’t even have to be this prepared. Some blankets and a pack of crisps and water would do. Just knowing that you’re here with me and going through the motions with me is enough. It helps things make sense again.” 

Jaehyun was speechless. 

So he was doing the right things, why couldn’t you see it? He would never do this for anyone else but you. There are many girls who give him their number, or people telling him that one lady from another course is interested in getting to know him. But no, his eyes were on you and only you. It was one of the few things that made sense in his world. 

“You’re more of an acts of service type of person then. Right?” he questioned, trying to keep the atmosphere a little light.

“Probably- oh and quality time. It makes sense if it was those two.” you attempted to do the math, and after a few seconds, you nodded, answering your own question.

From then, the conversation continued until the sky was pink. From then, you and Jaehyun knew it was time for silence. Time and space to think deeply. 

You quickly settle your head on his lap. He didn’t seem to mind, you thought. 

Your eyes focused on the pastel colours in the sky. You attempted to make shapes of the clouds, then moved on to count how many birds flew by until your eyes became tired. 

Jaehyun saw you close your eyes gently. He sighed again for the nth time that day. 

“How can someone be as beautiful as you and not see it?” he asked, looking at you. 

“How is your mind as complicated as it is when things clearly work out in the end if you just be a little more patient with yourself?” thinking aloud again. 

“How are you not able to see that things like this,” he looked around the vicinity and then you, “are for you. I do them for you because-” he hesitated, “I love you.” 

He whispered the last three words. Afraid he’ll wake you up. 

Little did he know, you were awake from the very first question he asked out loud. 

[absolutepokemontrash]

MC’s half Demon, and they look AWFULLY familiar...

‘Kay guys, I got a different kind of stupid Headcanon to throw at you. Get ready!

Part 2 Lessons 1-5 Part 2.5 Group Retreat Lessons 10-12 Lessons 13-15 Part 3 Part 4

*ahem* picture if you will, it’s the day the exchange program is set to start. The student council (nix Mr. Kill All Humans, Weeb-supreme, and our Scummy Sweetheart) have assembled to welcome the new human student. All is going according to schedule, the portal opens up at eight am sharp, they hear the pitiful screams of the selected human who was not given a heads up about the whole thing, and the poor little human falls straight onto the marble floor.

There’s something a tad... off about this human don’t you think? After they’ve peeled their sorry ass off the floor they observed the assembled student council with an air of sophistication and self importance that no one expected. Their posture was perfect, their eyes sharp and calculating... they bared a striking resemblance to-

“Lucifer,” Diavolo looked to his right hand man, then back to the human. “The human kind of looks like you!”

And out popped four pitch black wings from the human’s back and two small horns out of the sides of their head, one horn was a bit bigger than the other. They even still had some of their down feathers! How cute!

((Content warning: Swearing (I have a potty mouth, forgive me), but that’s it.))

Luci-dad

So, the MC is Lucifer’s kid! Of course Mr. Prideypants immediately tries to recall exactly what little romp in the human world uh... spawned this half-human half-demon child of his. Good thing MC’s got the other parent on speed-dial.

“Please note, MC,” Lucifer pinched the bridge of his nose upon hearing Asmo take even more pictures of his newly discovered hellspawn. “I was not aware of your existence, if I was I’d-”

“Don’t worry about it. I’m not upset.”

Lucifer blinked a few times in surprise. “P...pardon? You aren’t upset?”

“No, my parent told me that my father was a high ranking demon, and they bare no ill will against you. Though, I am looking forward to this whole... exchange program thing.”

Oh wow, that was easier than Lucifer thought. Damn. Well, he was a father... (let’s be real, he’s been parenting his brothers for thousands of years, and a good chunk of you sinners call him daddy)

MC is probably the most protected student at RAD, despite the fact that they have no visible security detail whatsoever. They didn’t want to be seen as... weak and pathetic.

Something about this human just... set the lesser demons on edge. Any talk of eating them was stamped out on the first day when they walked by. It’s like Lucifer himself was staring at them, daring the demons to try and bother the human. MC’s powerful presence kept them protected and feared.

...at least until dear uncle Asmo decided to do their hair one morning. All those ribbons may have looked adorable but they kind of ruined the intimidation factor.

MC loved to mess with the other students, keeping their lineage a secret for the first little while just made it so much funnier when the other demons tried to scramble out of MC’s way without looking like they were running from the ‘weak little human exchange student’.

Oh wow, what a sadist. Like father like child

Flying lessons are a must. Poor MC isn’t terribly good at controlling their wings, and their horns are still growing in so when they pop into their demon form the first thing they get is a sore skull. Ow... it sucks that Lucifer isn’t outwardly very sympathetic.

“Ow!” MC crashed face first into the grass in the backyard of the House of Lamentation. “Father! My wings are cramping! Can’t we practice this tomorrow?”

The sight of seeing his dear child crash face first into the ground had lost its hilarity after the first three times. Lucifer slowly lowered himself to the ground and crossed his arms as he stood over his incredibly grass-stained kid.

“MC, we’ve been ‘practicing this tomorrow’ for the past month. If you want to learn to fly you’re going to have to actually manage to stay in the air for more than three minutes.”

MC shot Lucifer a withering glare that only preteens were capable of, Lucifer matched it with his own much more sophisticated glare.

“You’ve been flying for over a thousand years! Don’t you have any tips that can actually help other than ‘don’t panic, you’ll look ridiculous’?”

Lucifer dragged a gloved hand down his face and looked around, the two were alone as far as he could see.

“MC,” Lucifer began. “When I was a young angel, I needed to learn how to fly with someone else.”

MC perked up. “Who?”

“Michael. The smug bastard picked up flying quicker than I did.”

“What’d you do?!”

Lucifer smiled at his child’s intense investment. “I practiced flying every day for five extra hours until I could do everything that Michael could do, just better.”

MC’s starry eyed interest died almost instantly upon hearing about the extra five hours of practice. “Humph, I bet I could outfly younger you and Michael with only two hours of practice a day.”

“Really now?”

“Yes! Watch!” MC shook off their wings and took off in a running start before shakily making it into the air. Their form was decent enough, and they weren’t shaking as much as the previous attempts. “SEE?!”

“Yes MC,” Lucifer smiled. “I can see.”

You know what else Lucifer could see? MC crashing right into a tree.

“Ouch...”

Okay... maybe they could halt practice a little early and order a treat from Madame Scream’s. A little sugar to refuel is needed when the end goal is crushing a mutual rival beneath their heels. Just some good old fashioned father/child bonding time!

MC has a smaller seat right next to Lucifer’s seat in the Assembly Hall. I will not compromise on this one.

For all your fluff needs, I give you: Lucifer teaching MC how to play the piano. He has a proud little smile on his face when his kid finally starts getting it. That’s all. Enjoy the image.

That one Uncle who gives you Alcohol at Family Gatherings (Mammon)

Yeah, when Mammon burst in late to the party and whining about everyone’s spamming him with texts to haul his scummy ass to the Assembly Hall, the last thing he expected was to see a mini-Lucifer.

“What the fuck am I lookin’ at?!”

The glare the two Lucifers gave the poor Avatar of Greed was enough to make him want to turn tail (uh, wing) and book it down the hall.

“Mammon, this is MC. They’re my child.”

“Hello.”

“...whaaaa..?” Mammon looked between the two, same glare, same intimidating aura, same annoyingly good posture.

Mammon scratched the back of his neck and looked over at his older brother. “Do I uh... still gotta babysit em’ if they’re not human?”

“The lake of Cocytus will melt the day I let you babysit without supervision.” Lucifer grumbled.

“I don’t need a babysitter!”

Despite Lucifer’s initial denial, Mammon and MC ended up spending a lot of time hanging out when Lucifer was busy with paperwork. Of course Mammon’s first thought was ‘how do I profit off this situation?’

MC is now Mammon’s designated babysitter after they caught him picking up their feathers that had fallen off with the intention of painting them white and claiming they were Lucifer’s from back in the Celestial Realm.

Mammon does end up spoiling MC a little. Just a smidge. They’re the kid of his totally not his favourite brother after all! How could he not? Whether or not these gifts are obtained legally or are legal at all is subject to scrutiny.

“Mammon, I can’t drink this!” MC placed the bottle of Demonus back on the counter of the kitchen.

“Why not? That’s a bottle of the good stuff! We gotta celebrate you gettin’ an A on that test somehow!”

“I’m underage! Incredibly underage. I’m not legally allowed to drink.”

Mammon wordlessly plopped a silly straw into the bottle. “...does that help?”

“No.” MC then inclined their head to the bottle. “And I don’t want to get hung from the ceiling, that bottle was in my father’s study yesterday, I’m above theft.”

“How old are you s’posed to be anyway? Never mind... uh...” Mammon wracked his brain for something else he could do for MC that didn’t cost anything (don’t judge him, the poor bastard was flat broke!). “I could... teach you to drive!”

“Driving?”

“Yeah! Drivin’ is awesome! We can take my car!”

The bills for the damages done to the car and the Devildom were mailed to Lucifer the next day, and MC and Mammon got to keep each other company as they hung from the ceiling. Ah well! At least MC wasn’t upside down!

Mammon wasn’t that good of a flight teacher either, he also crashed into a tree (the same tree MC crashed into, actually) when he was cheering for MC. They were finally able to do a loopdy loop! He was proud and distracted! Okay?! Lucifer! Stop smirkin’ at him! It’s not that funny!

At least the vantage point from the tree was decent and the branches didn’t scratch him up too badly. Oh hey... that person walking by was wearing a very nice watch... he’d be right back-

That Uncle That is Always Absent From Family Gatherings and When He is Present He Leaves Early (Levi)

He missed everything. That is not an exaggeration. He was in the middle of an online raid battle and couldn’t look at his phone! No Lucifer he can’t pause an online game! That’s not how it works!

Okay, the human exchange student is half demon? WOAH! THAT’S JUST LIKE THAT ONE ANIME- W A I T. THE LITTLE NORMIE IS LUCIFER’S KID?!

Okie doke, he was fully convinced that MC just had to be an anime protagonist.

They binged every series that Levi compared them to. Sure MC might have missed a few assignments because of late night anime binges, but they were too good for this school crap anyway, right?

Nope. Lucifer put a ban on the two watching anime until both their grades improved. Surviving that hell brought the two together.

“Ugh!”

The sound of a pencil case being haphazardly thrown across the room made Levi peek out of his bed-tub. If his figurines got knocked over so HELP HIM-

“This is stupid!!I shouldn’t have to catch up with this!” MC crossed their arms and gave their Demonology textbook their best disapproving glare.

Lucifer Lite (tm) was having a hell of a time trying to claw through their missed work, and Levi sympathized, he really did, it’s just... he was playing Animal Crossing-

Levi paused the game to placate his anime-buddy when their wings popped out and he feared for his rare merch’s safety.

“H-hey, MC? Do you need help?” Levi’s offer was met with a bone chilling glare that lived rent free in his nightmares ever since. He had pulled a Mammon and forgotten he was talking to Lucifer’s child. Lucifer’s allergy to help must have passed down to MC.

“No! I don’t! It’s just... dumb!” MC hissed, she turned and looked over at the fish tank. “Right Henry 2.0?”

Henry 2.0 did not respond.

“MC, you need to finish your homework or we can’t watch anything together,” Levi sighed, he had finished his work over an hour earlier. He had mastered the art of all night anime binges and managing to do most of his work in the fifteen minutes between the time he woke up and the time school was supposed to begin. “We haven’t even binged all of volume 4 of TSL yet!”

“Mmm...” MC grumbled. “Fine...”

MC picked up their pencil case and began continued their work. Levi breathed a sigh of relief and went back to Animal Crossing.

The tiny normie did in fact finish their work, only after they caved and asked Levi for help. Swore him to secrecy, they did... very intimidating, they were.

Just saying, he most definitely sent that one Keanu Reeves meme with big Keanu and little Keanu but with Lucifer and MC to the wrong group chat. Poor bastard.

Flying lessons? No. Levi hadn’t flown since his time in the Celestial Realm, he had no advice to give other than: “Flap your wings!”

“THAT’S WHAT I’M DOING YOU-”

MC didn’t get to finish that thought, they lost their balance and fell right into RAD’s fountain. Ah well, Levi had a head start on running for his life that he squandered by laughing at MC. RIP.

The Uncle/brother/whatever the fuck that Starts a Fight With Your Dad at the Family Reunion. (Satan)

Oh... another Lucifer? Eugh. Gross.

Satan gave the kid a wide berth when they first met. Everything the kid said or did ticked him off. “Tsk. Look at MC. Making an omelette. So annoying.” “Oh wow, MC vacuumed? Roll out the red carpet, we need to celebrate their existence!” “Look at them. Breathing. Disgusting.”

MC’s pride wouldn’t ever let them admit it but... they knew Satan didn’t like them, and it hurt their feelings.

“Shhhh,” Satan whispered into his backpack.

“Meow.” The backpack replied.

“I said shhhhh.”

The backpack did not reply after that, which was a good thing considering the little princet of the HOL was nearby.

“Satan?” They asked. “Who are you talking to?”

Satan coldly brushed past them as he made his way to his room. “No one you need to concern yourself with.”

When the little calico kitten was safe in his room, Satan quickly realized a mistake in his foolproof ‘sneak a cat into the house’ plan. He didn’t have any toys for the kitten, and he didn’t want his books getting scratched...

It was alright, he’d just rush out to the a store that sold cat things and rush back! Five minute trip tops!

Well when Satan got back the cat was no longer in the room. Oh dear. He discreetly tore apart the house looking for the poor little thing until he ended up finding it in the library, happily chasing around a loose feather being held up by MC.

“Oh, hello Satan.” MC chirped as the kitten batted it’s adorable little paws at the feather.

“My... my door was closed. Did you let the cat out?”

MC shrugged. “I heard meowing.”

Satan ran a hand through his hair and grumbled. Stupid smaller Lucifer. Stupid original Lucifer. Everyone sucked.

“Let me guess, you’re going to run to Lucifer and tell him all about the meowing and the rule breaking.”

MC shook their head and glared at Satan. “Of course not. I’ve already gotten way too attached to this little guy anyway. We’re co-parenting this kitten like mature adults.”

With some coaxing, Satan did sit down and play with the kitten, maybe MC wasn’t... so terrible.

The two watch Unsolved Mysteries together, that’s their show. “This guy did it.” “Satan, we’re two minutes into the episode-” “Trust me.”

Thirty minutes later.

“He did it.” “See MC, what’d I tell you?”

Lucifer did find out about the cat, but with enough pleading, MC and Satan managed to warm up the cold spot in Lucifer’s chest where his heart should have been. The cat’s name is Detective Toe Beans (or just Bean).

Satan can’t fly, he has a tail, but he did read up on wing anatomy and how flight actually works in demons, his advice would be good in theory, but it’s full of so much technical jargon that MC can’t understand it.

At least MC didn’t crash into something, they barrel rolled through one of the HOL’s windows. Good thing it was the window to their room. The broken arm still hurt like hell.

The Best Dressed Bitch Who Brings The Booze to The Reunion. (Asmo)

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Lucifer’s kid was SO CUTE! A thousand pictures commemorating that adorable moment needed to be taken! Wait- Lucifer- GIVE BACK THE PHONE-

Asmo, surprise surprise, absolutely adores little MC! So cute! So small! He was just so excited to announce to all his Devilgram followers that Lucifer was finally a certified DILF.

That post disappeared five minutes after it was made but the damage had already been done.

Asmo made sure MC looked their best at all times, if they needed help talking to anyone? Asmo’s got their back!

Sure, maybe he’s a little pushy, but pushy’s a good thing sometimes, right?

“Asmodeus-”

“No, these shoes wouldn’t fit you...”

“Asmo-”

“No, not these ones either...”

“ASMODEUS.”

Asmo squeaked and jumped upwards, Geez Louise... little MC’s voice could sure be scary when they wanted it to be...

“I don’t need any fancy new shoes.” MC huffed, sitting up straighter in one of the chairs in Asmo’s room. “I thought this was supposed to be a sleepover.”

“Hmmm...” Asmo pouted. “Makeovers are an essential part of sleepovers... what’d you do with your human friends up in the human world that could possibly be better than a make-over?!”

MC began to list things off. “Ordered junk food, talked about people we hated, watched movies,”

“Greasy food is so bad for your skin...” Asmo cringed and shook his head violently. “But I’m totally down to watch a movie and bitch about people I hate!”

“Ah yes, human sleepovers, a tradition I never quite had the chance to enjoy.” Solomon said from Asmo’s bed. “Who are we bitching about?”

“Remind me what Solomon is doing here.” MC muttered as they sat down in front of Asmo’s TV.

“Because, I wanted to hang out with my two favourite humans.” Asmo cooed, reaching over and trying to pinch MC’s cheek, which they awkwardly dodged.

“Can we watch The Exorcist?” Solomon asked, propping his head up with his hands.

“Ew, no.” Asmo made a face at him. “That scene with the vomit? Hell NO.”

“Mm.” MC mumbled. Asmo turned to look at them.

“MC? Are you doing okay? You don’t look like you’re having any fun...”

“I’m fine.” MC grumbled.

Asmo pursed his lips, as much as it made his little narcissistic heart break, he nudged MC. “Why don’t you pick the movie, sweetie. I’m sure Solomon and I will like anything you pick!”

MC noticeably brightened. “Let’s watch Scream!”

The strangled noise that came from Asmo was... concerning, but to his credit, The Avatar of Lust held his tongue about his distaste for the movie, and the three slumber-party goers had quite the lovely time.

After the movie ended, MC went back to their room, sure it was a sleepover but their bed was right down the hall.

Good for Asmo and Solomon. Horny fuckers. We stan.

Asmo just claps and tries to cheer MC on when it comes to their flying lessons. (The idea that Asmo came up with to wear his cheerleader costume from the previous Halloween was immediately shot down by Lucifer)

“You’re doing wonderful, MC- WATCH OUT FOR THE POWER LINE!”

MC didn’t hit the power line, but Asmo’s scream of terror caused them to fall butt-first into a dumpster. Their injured tailbone served as a tragic memory of the incident.

Oh well, good thing Asmo had nice smelling soap to give that could mask dumpster-stink.

The Uncle that eats everything and tells you to eat your veggies while you angrily pick at your broccoli at the kid’s table. (Beel)

Lucifer... has a kid?! Beel choked on the cheetos he had snuck into the Assembly Hall when the kid’s wings popped out.

Oh wow, that’s nice :) maybe they can eat together. Belphie would probably like them.

Wait what is the gender neutral term for Niece or Nephew?

...Nibling? Uh... let’s not say that around Beel. We don’t need him to get hungrier and begin associating MC with nibbling on things.

The Underground Tomb incident probably went a little differently, but after all that nonsense, the two are closer than two peas in a pod!

Mmm... peas...

“Beel?” MC stepped into the Avatar of Gluttony’s room.

“Hi MC.” Beel was doing push-ups in the middle of the room, on the ground right beneath his head was a massive bowl of spaghetti that he bit into every time he completed a push-up. “Can you come stand on my back? I need the extra weight.”

“On your back?” MC padded closer. “Are you sure? It’s not going to hurt?”

“No, it’ll be okay.” Beel assured them. “Belphie and I did this all the time. Except Belphie is normally asleep.”

MC tentatively stepped onto Beel’s back. It was a balancing act to say the least, they eventually gave up on standing and ended up sitting cross legged between Beel’s shoulder blades.

“You did this with Belphegor?” MC asked.

“Yeah,” Beel sighed. “He was always too tired to exercise, but he’d let me bench press him sometimes...”

MC frowned and hugged their knees to their chest. Knowing full well that Beel’s twin wasn’t in the human world like Lucifer said was absolutely ripping them apart from the inside. Guilt felt just as rotten as their pride did when they were being belittled...

“Maybe you’ll see him again sometime soon.” MC whispered. “Maybe my father’ll come to his senses and let him come back down to the Devildom.”

Beel paused his push-ups for a brief moment, then nodded and went back to his eating exercising combo. “I hope so. He’ll like you, MC. I’m sure of it.”

MC nodded. “I... hope so.”

Beel’s a pretty decent flight teacher, but his wings are just so different from MC’s that it renders any tips he had next to useless.

“MC, maybe your wings aren’t flapping fast enough.”

“Beel, I appreciate the thought, but I’m not a hummingbird. Or a fly. I don’t need to flap my wings a million times a minute to stay afloat.”

Ah well, MC tried to take some of Beel’s advice, but their lower right wing cramped up and they ended up flying in circles until Beel was able to catch them. Ah well, better than the dumpster incident the previous week.

The Uncle That Passes Out in The Basement and You’re Not Allowed to Wake Him Up Even Though All Your Toys and Video Games Are Down There. He Also Picks a Fight With Your Dad’s New S/O Before He Passes Out. (Belphie)

Sitting in the attic was quite a drag, and this supposedly weak little human was quite the annoyance to try and call out to. It took a lot longer than expected, but when he heard little footsteps coming towards his prison, Belphegor nearly jumped with joy.

Oh... it... looked like Lucifer. Smelled like Lucifer. Stood like Lucifer. Quacked like Lucifer. Or... trilled..? Whatever sound a peacock made, this brat sounded an awful lot like Lucifer.

A... half-demon. Hmph. Belphie honestly thought Lucifer had actual standards. Not anymore, he guessed.

(Man I could fill a whole-ass fic with the Belphie betrayal thing, but for now let’s skip to post attic nonsense)

Okay so maybe MC wasn’t disgusting. They made a good nap buddy. It was cute when their wings came out when they were sleeping sometimes. Well... it was cute when they didn’t hit him in the face and make him wake up with his mouth full of feathers.

What Beel said had been true, Belphie made a good substitute when weights weren’t available, but Beel didn’t want MC to feel left out, so Belphie and MC ended up sitting on his back while he did push ups. MC once got bored and started playing Go Fish with Belphie on Beel’s back while he exercised.

Yes. MC is still a member of the Formerly-Anti-Lucifer League.

“Are you sure he’s not going to be too mad at us?” MC asked for the dozenth time that day. Detective Toe Beans was wrapped around their neck like a scarf (he had gotten so big!!!) while MC nervously sat in one of the Library chairs.

“Positive.” Belphie said with a toothy grin. “Besides, he’s like putty when it comes to you. Just give him your best puppy eyes and we’re not guilty on all charges.”

Putty..? Really..? Lucifer..? How strict was he before MC got there... they wondered.

“Sh! He’s coming!” Satan stuck his nose into a random book, it was the Oxford English Dictionary... and it was upside down.

Belphie pretended to pass out and MC decided that the best course of action was to stare deeply into their cat’s eyes. Yeah... that looked casual and not weird.

“Satan, MC, Belphie.” Lucifer nodded to the three of them as he walked towards the entrance to his study.

“Lucifer.”

“Afternoon, father.”

Belphie let out a cartoonishly loud fake snore that nearly caused both MC and Satan to break cover and start laughing.

Side note, Bean had adorable widdle eyes! That cute little face was just to die for-

“You three..!”

Belphie, Satan, and MC peeked their heads into Lucifer’s study, their handiwork was perfect. Everything was covered in red post it notes. Perfectly not harmful, but SO inconvenient!

“You’re all cleaning this up or so help me-”

“GO!” Belphie and Satan each grabbed one of MC’s arms (Satan also grabbed Bean) and sprinted out of the House of Lamentation. Maybe they’d move back there in twenty years... they hoped that Solomon and The Angels would let them crash at Purgatory Hall...

Belphie had used up his physical energy supply for the next four years. He passed out the moment they stepped into sanctuary. Time for a nap...

Flight practice? Ha. Belphie’s napping. Though, he was suspiciously awake and filming whenever MC did something stupid.

“Try not to suck so bad.”

“GO TO HELL BELPHIE!”

“I’m already there. Hell is every second I’m stuck here watching you fail.”

“YOU’RE GOING TO GET IT FOR THAT!”

Well... MC mastered the dive bomb that day. Lucifer bought them a cake.

Bonus! Your Dad’s New Husband! That Has Managed to Somehow Make Everyone Hate Him Despite the Fact That He’s A Cinnamon Roll. (Diavolo)

A mini Lucifer? A mini Lucifer!

Diavolo dotes on MC like he’d dote on his own kid. MC wants a crown? They’re getting a crown! A damn nice one too! MC wants a title? Here! MC is now... idk Ruler of the area between Majolish and Hell’s Kitchen.

Poor Uncle Mammon’s got some financial insecurity, he’s still the cool uncle... right?!

He is very much that ‘how do you do fellow kids?’ Meme.

He tries to do stereotypical ‘dad’ things but he’s not very good at them. Once he tried to host a barbecue...

Barbatos saved the day, but Mammon’s hair was still singed, Solomon’s cooking still gave Beel food poisoning (SOLOMON EATS TOXIC WASTE I SWEAR-), Luke still got hit in the face with a frisbee, and Simeon got an unhealthy dose of DAD NERVES and got so stressed everyone was almost blinded by the holy light he suddenly started blasting. We do not mention the water guns.

(Seriously whose bright idea was it to give Belphie and Satan water guns while they were in Lucifer’s presence?)

Praise Barbie. He’s too good for them.

“Um...” MC awkwardly held up the baseball, trying to look at it from all angles like it was a completely alien object. “Lord Diavolo... are you sure you want to play catch?”

Diavolo clapped his hands and bounced on the balls of his feet. “Yes! It’s a thing human fathers do with their children, correct? We must make up for lost time between you and Lucifer, right?”

Lucifer massaged his temples and nodded. “If you two would like to play catch...” Lucifer grimaced. “I will too.”

“Okay! MC, throw the ball to Lucifer!” Diavolo instructed.

Lucifer half heartedly held up his baseball glove as MC tossed him the ball. He caught it, and looked over at Diavolo, who was applauding like he just witnessed the greatest feat in sports history.

“Okay! Throw it to me!” Diavolo waved his glove in the air, Lucifer rolled his eyes and smiled. He threw the ball at Diavolo with... a lot of force. Enough force to probably dent steel... Diavolo caught it like it was nothing.

MC suddenly feared for their safety.

“Okay MC, catch!”

Diavolo threw the ball with enough force to break the god damn sound barrier. Well, maybe that was an exaggeration, but the ball sailed way over MC’s head and crashed right through a window.

“Oh my...” Diavolo put a hand on his hip and surveyed the damage to the window. “This isn’t so bad, I believe in human world TV shows this happens quite often. Look! The glass broke in a perfect circle!”

“Yay... property damage...” MC murmured.

Lucifer sighed and pulled out his DDD. “I’ll phone someone to replace the win-”

“Lucifer no! Now according to human world customs we must,” Diavolo took a deep breath, rushed forward, grabbed both Lucifer and MC’s hands and started sprinting away from the Demon Lord’s Castle. “RUN FOR IT!”

“Di- Diavolo!” Lucifer gasped.

“Who are we running from?! That’s your castle!” MC squeaked.

“I don’t know! Just run! That’s what the human TV show says to do!”

Weirdly enough, Diavolo was the best flight instructor. MC’s ability to fly increased tenfold after Diavolo found out that MC was learning to fly.

“You’re doing amazing MC! That was a perfect turn!”

“Thanks Lord Diavolo, I’m surprised I haven’t crashed into anyone or fallen yet!”

“Well, I highly doubt you’ll be crashing into anyone anymore, your flying is practically perfect now!”

Mammon proceeded to fly past them holding what looked like Lucifer’s wallet.

“M-mammon?!”

“Oh... I wonder what he’s doing. Look, MC! It’s Lucifer! Hello Lucifer dea-”

Lucifer ended up colliding with the two of them and sending them all crashing to the floor.

That was the last time MC fell during flying practice.

(We currently have a Go Fund Me set up for Mammon to get the funds necessary to flee the Devildom after that incident. Please donate to save- oh shit hi Lucifer-)