#ive never seen the impact thank god but i did see an image of one of the cars afterwards

[andromedasummer]

been rewatching old endurance races just listening to them in the background while i draw/plan dnd stuff/play games. watching spa 24 hrs from 2021 and completely forgot about the accident about 30 mins in. got to be some of the strangest broadcast behaviour ive seen in a race, and i say that as someone who has done papers on live broadcast and its rules.

obviously normal protocol for a big crash is you wait for the drivers to get out and confirm theyre okay/on their way to the medical center. then the crash is shown once or twice to give viewers and comms clarification of the incident along with info about the drivers wellbeing/insight into what may have happened to cause it.

but what happened here caused way more anxiety. mid normal commentary race director comes on radio calling a full course yellow. comms have no idea whats caused it and assume a car has broken down on track and needs to be moved.

in reality, an incredibly severe crash occured at what i believe is the most dangerous corner in motorsport, most dangerous on track for sure. 4 car collision, all drivers sent to the medical center, 2 discharged and 2 sent to hospital 40 mins later (i remember aitken suffered spinal/chest injuries and a broken arm but he made a full recovery)

but none of the commentators are ever told what happened. people working the cameras are careful not to show anything because you don't show a crash/wreck until you know the drivers are okay, basic respect. but no one is telling the broadcast team anything. so for the next 40 minutes, the fcy continues and the comms and the viewers are left to speculate about what's happened and they aren't positive speculations, especially when people who saw the crash in front of their stands start tweeting and sharing photos/vids/what they saw online. this kind of thing (official sources being quiet around a crash and tip-toeing) does happen, but its normally when an accident has been fatal.

of course everything turned out okay. after the 40 mins passed, the race director came on over the radio and informed the drivers and viewers that 2 of the drivers were discharged from the med centre and two were going to hospital with non-life threatening injuries. im very surprised to have seen this kind of breakdown of communication happen. certainly its better safe than sorry and i'd rather have a nonfatal crash never shown during a race runtime than a fatal crash be replayed to death. but there comes a point where what is not being shown begins to imply a very distressing scenario. its not an easy position to put a commentator in, asking them to talk in the gaps with this uneasy fear hanging over them for an odd hour. and its distressing for fans who may be friends and family watching abroad to have the main feed not address what happened, or even who was involved.

[misqnon]

yeah i definitely liked sanuso more than i liked sanji. before... before i came to like sanji. i don't think i was rly an Actual Fan though. seeing fan content of sanji (shipping content included) is part of what made me grow to like him. so ur right that a ship i like with characters i dont like would make me grow to like the characters!!

tashigi and reiju is so insanely good.. theyre perfect for each other...

LMAO ISNT THAT PRICE A BIT STEEP?? nami moment

robin definitely would notice but it would have so much more impact to have luffy intervene imo?? he is probably the most important person to both of them (arguably true for all the crew) and also he just . idk hes emotionally intelligent. hes perceptive. people dont give him enough credit. luffy is not stupid!!!!

"he and robin can be similar and enies lobby is what made everyone love her more…" YEAH EXACTLY!!! there doesnt need to be a whole arc but just show us that he isnt JUST the cool guy. i need him to cry .... i need emotional vulnerability.. please oda ..... on my knees begging for this. PLEASE Oda...

"already there babes 🫡 just doing my part" thank u

"DID. DID THEY ACTUALLY CALL HIM TRACE HEATFIST IN THE 4KIDS DUB…ARE U SERIOUS RN…IVE NEVER HEARD THAT BEFORE PLEASE SAY SIKE." YES THEY ACTUALLY DID. its a stupid change but HIS VOICE IS SO COOL... theres a scene where he and luffy meet on alabasta n luffy is like: hey, trace?! and trace is like "yours truly 😎😏🔥 hey luffy, whats up? 🔥🔥💪✨" and i fucking Fell In Love on first listen. i have the biggest . fattest crush on 4kids ace. why is he so suave. why is he so cool. pathetically showing my love for the worst dub's version of the best character

i was so relieved that luffy sounded different that i can forgive anything else. i don't care if the acting is worse...

AT A CHRISTIAN GALLERY???? ur so brave

"i will share embarrassing stories like my life depends on it"

(hoping i havent used this image before)

THE SPOTLIGHT ON SANJI.... THAT IS SO FUNNY...

"BUT IM TOO BUSY READING ONE PIECE" good point... reading both would be hard.. /gen

"lion…and wings…so u want to be a griffin 👁️" i did not realize this. but yes i GUESS I DO?? i like manticores and unicorns the most out of any fantasy creature but i could never be a manticore bc it means i keep my face.. and unicorn.... doesnt have cool paws... oh and i love dragons... i WOULD be a dragon but i would like to be like. fluffy.. i want to be fluffy..

"DIDN THE BEAT OUT ZORO IN THE POPULARITY POLLS ONE TIME" YEAH HE DID... i dont know maybe i just missed it?? there were a lot of ppl there... and my memory is kinda hazy.. i will be on the lookout for law next time i go to a con

"WRONG bangs my sanji gavel." I FORGOT U WERW THE SANJI MAGISTRATE..... please forgive me....

that is so cool 🥹

"also sanji’s love for mice/rats makes me fucking insane bc its the cutest thing on earth." I KNOW RIGJT... like hes a cook.. he should hate them... but he doesnt!!! hes super fond of them!!! because he had mice friends at the lowest point in his life!!!! GOD.. i also used to love mice so . thank u sanji. representing rodent lovers. im having too many moments lately where i relate to sanji.... former sanji hater becomes sanji

"SANJI LOVES MICE MORE THAN WOMEN CONFIRMED-" GENUINELY!!!

"they’re all expecting sanji to freak and kill them and then they walk in and he’s made them tiny stir fry and is calling them cutesy names." STOP THATS SUCH CUTE IMAGERY 😭😭😭 sanji would never hit a woman mouse.

"also all the fan content ive seen where ratatouille is his favorite movie. ANYONE CAN COOK!!!!! 😭" IT MAKES SO MUCH SENSE

"we turn a sad into a frrAAANKKYYYYYYYY" HSJDHS

"ROBIN WHYYY WAS THAT THE FIRST THING YOU THOUGHT OFFFF SHE IS INSANE. SHE’S SO WEIRD." IN HER DEFENSE, THEY WERE RIGHT THERE. HOW COULD SHE NOT... HOW COULD SHE NOT EVEN THINK ABOUT IT ....

"should i send some on discord as well. is that how i break the ice. images of sanji with his ass up in the air (my collection)" YES..... YES DO IT.... in return i will sned... uhmm... law!??

ok but sanji in glasses. even at the peak of my sanji hatred i begrudgingly admit that he was very attractive in those glasses...

LOOK AT HIM SOB... whole cake island was kinda his enies lobby emotional depth moment???

heres this loser

EAT

i have this sanji saved bc he looks so pathetic and sad

omg nooo how did choso get in here ...... noooo ...... that was a big accident.... completely an accident.... not on purpose at alll........

usopp out here converting more ppl to sanji likers than i am…smh. i do love the way sanji backs him up so often in canon tho, its very sweet

KNJKCDNA WAIT THE $5,000 A MONTH THING? I MEAN YES. BUT DO YOU KNOW THE YE OLDE TUMBLR JOKE IM REFERENCING? DO U REMEMBER COMMUNISMKILLS…THAT AWFUL TUMBLR USER THAT THEN WAS LIKE “i’ll shut up if u pay me $5000 a month” actually deranged and iconic. here’s a post about it

the entire crew IS important to both of them but arguably he is the only person on the crew they would listen to in a situation like that is luffy yea. he’s the mutual friend that they both love deeply and loves both of them deeply even tho they hate (“hate”) each other. AND he’s emotionally intelligent and wise!! yea!!

joining u in the begging for sad zoro. campaigning for abusing zoro in the next chapters. ready to make this meme real

NOT TRACE HEATFIST…his voice did seem cool tho ur right. i like to imagine he speaks with the emojis like you typed them. (“how are you saying that out loud-”) is the crush only on 4kids ace specifically..sorry sorry TRACE. IS IT ONLY FOR TRACE

I WANT TO STEAL ALL THESE REACTION IMAGES HAHAHA

WAIT IS IT A SPOTLIGHT. I THOUGHT THEY HAD TRAPPED HIM UNDER A CUP LIKE A BUG KJAFHBdiwjnwd

dragons. [breathes in] dude i love dragons so fucking much. i watched that documentary animal planet or discovery made where they said dragons lived in the prehistoric time with t rex and shit and BELIEVED IT FOR SO LONG. also obsessively played httyd games on the internet and other Dragon Themed Things. and i had legend of spyro: a new beginning for the gamecube and it was like my first ever video game i owned myself that wasnt a hand me down and i beat it literally 9+ times…after 9 i stopped keeping track..i loved spyro and CYNDER so much. CYNDER WAS SO COOL. THAT WHOLE GAME WAS SO COOL. just last year i started playing flight rising (but i fell off lmao)

“former sanji hater becomes sanji” KJSDBDNKJSN YEAH relating to sanji is half of why i love him. and the amount i relate to him is. way far more than i thought i would ever relate to. the pervert stereotype anime character of any given show. so mad…but also i love him a lot 😭 has become a bit of a comfort character for me UNFORTUNATELY…but i relate to his passion and his low self esteem and his self sacrificial nature and his (percieved) gender issues and even his stupid easy-to-fall-in-love shtick. god. anyways

MICE > WOMEN ‼️‼️‼️CONFIRMED

I WANT TO PUT THE SANJI FEEDING MICE AND THE CREW IS CONFUSED SCENE IN A FIC SO BAD BUT I HAVE WRITERS BLOCK ATM 😭

“sanji would never hit a woman mouse.” sanji vs. minnie mouse his hardest battle yet

ROBIN….ROBIN 😭 I WILL CONDONE ALL HER ACTIONS BC I LOVE HER BUT SHES SO STRANGE 😭

SANJI ASS IN THE AIR COMING UR WAY

dude. thank you for saying that bc. when sanji had those fucking glasses on as mr. prince in alabasta. i was simping just a little bit. and mad about it.

AND ALSO UM??? WHAT THE FUCK WAS THIS?? STOP BEING PRETTY???

this outfit was gay as hell by the way. like how am i supposed to believe that is a fuly straight man-

“whole cake island was kinda his enies lobby emotional depth moment???” it 1000% was down to him leaving the crew and needing to be rescued and learn to love himself and live for himself. robin and sanji are my two favorite strawhats and GOD THE SIMILARITIES ARE BRUISING. have u seen that post where its drawings of each of the strawhat “rescue teams” of arlong park, enies lobby, and whole cake?

law 1: edgy. flipping u off. deranged. a bit evil looking. kinda hot

law 2: naptime. flourishing. in his lane. never done wrong in his life. thats just a guy

“EAT” KJDBVSDAJBCJDA

NOOO THAT SANJI IMAGE GENUINELY MAKES ME SO SAD BUT HE ALSO LOOKS SO SO PATHETIC 😭 SOPPING WET CAT OF A MAN

HI CHOSO. IDK U BUT I LIKE UR HAIR. HI

here are a couple more one piece memes i have collected. i will be sending u a discord message...soon

[bumblesimagines]

Green Thumb

Part 15

Request: Yes or No

Nebula and Tonys friendship was v cute and we deserved to see Tony be a dad to her. This feels v short so I'm sorry

~

"Maybe some company will do you good, (Y/N)." Natasha said softly, rubbing your arm. You stayed silent, staring at the table. Rhodes had offered you your old room back but you couldn't give him an answer. Your gaze shifted to the glass of water, brows furrowing when the water in the glass began to move. Natasha followed your gaze.

"I'm not doing that." You said softly, glancing at her. Steve entered the room, heading towards the exit.

"Something's coming." He called. Rhodes and Bruce quickly followed him out. You stood up, doing the same. You walked out onto the field, seeing Pepper staring up at a ship. You watched the woman set it down, looking back at you all. Steve ran forward, helping Tony off the ship. Pepper sobbed, running forward as well. You turned, walking back towards the facility.

"Great, the douchebag survived." You muttered, opening the door and sitting back down. You knew loss would come with trying to save the world but you didn't expect to lose everyone you loved. Clint and Natasha were still around but they were grieving as well.

"(Y/N), this is Carol Danvers, a friend of Fury." Natasha said as she entered the room. You turned to look at the blonde, giving a small nod. You watched as Rhodes pulled up images of everyone who had been lost to catch Tony up. Your gaze dropped onto the table when you saw your friends images appear.

"World governments are in pieces. He did.. He did exactly what he was planning to do. He wiped out.. 50 percent of all living creatures." Natasha explained, voices getting softer. You took in a shakey breath, sitting up and glancing at everyone. You made eye contact with Tony. He was skinny and weak but he held sadness in his eyes.

"Is Barton..?" Tony trailed off.

"Clint survived... Laura and the kids are gone." You told him, voice threatening to crack. Tony inhaled deeply, nodding.

"Where is Thanos? Where is he now?" Tony asked, looking at Steve. Steve frowned.

"We don't know. He just.. Opened a portal and walked through." Steve said, staring down at the floor. Tony hummed, turning to look at Thor.

"What's wrong with him?"

"He's pissed. He thinks he failed. Which, yeah he did but so did the rest of us." The talking raccoon, Rocket, said. You didn't have enough energy to question how a raccoon ended up in space, much less question how it could talk.

"Honestly, until this exact last second, I thought you were a build-a-bear." Tony said, looking at him.

"Maybe I am." Rocket muttered in a tired and defeated tone.

"Thanos has been missing for three weeks now. We've got nothing. Tony, you fought him."

"Who told you that? No, he wiped my face with a planet while the magician gave away the stone. That's what happened. There was no fight-"

"Okay, okay.. Did he give you any clues?" Steve asked. Tony blew some raspberries, shrugging. You sighed at his childish response.

"I had a vision. I didn't want to believe it.. Thought I was dreaming-"

"Tony, I need you to focus."

"-And I needed you. As in past tense. That trumps what you need. You know what I need?" Tony knocked over some glasses, standing up from his wheelchair. "I need to shave."

"Tony, Tony, stop." Rhodes approached him as Tony ripped off his IV needle.

"What we needed was a suit of armour around the world! Remember that? Whether it impacted our precious freedoms or not." Tony looked over everyone.

"Your project got Sokovia destroyed and ruined." You reminded him, finger running over the rim of the glass cup. Tony began stumbling as he argued with Steve, stumbling towards him. He ripped off the Arc reactor, putting it in Steve's hand before falling to the ground. He fainted afterwards so Rhodes and Steve got him to the medical unit.

"This is such a shitshow. I'm going home." You said, standing up and picking up the glass. Natasha turned towards you.

"Stay for a little longer-"

"For what? So I can be told nothing's gonna bring back by family? My best friends? I had nothing then I had something and now I have nothing again." You flinched when the cup shattered, pieces of glass and water landing on the ground. You sighed softly, taking the shards stuck in your skin out.

"Sorry. I'll clean this up." You mumbled, using your other hand to get the water off the floor. Carol blinked, watching in surprise. You opened one of the cabinets, pulling out the first aid kit. You turned your head when Carol stood beside you.

"Hey." You breathed out, running your hand under water to wash away some of the blood. Carol picked up the antibiotic cream, using a cotton ball to dab it onto your cuts. You didn't really feel like healing yourself.

"I'm sorry you lost so many people." She said quietly, picking up the bandages and wrapping them around your hand.

"Well, shit happens." You looked at your bandaged palm, sighing softly.

"I lost two best friends." Carol said, leaning against the counter.

"Nick and Monica, the daughter of a good friend." Carol looked at you, arms crossing.

"Sams' sister calls nonstop and I don't know what to tell her. She has two toddlers, both parents passed away, and she's a widow. How can I tell her that her older brother turned into dust and I couldn't do anything to save him? Dad and I can't even look at each other without noticing how empty the house feels. I wake up everyday hoping it was all a nightmare but then I don't hear Laura telling the kids to get up or Clint going on about teaching Lila archery." You looked away from her, eyes watering. Carol placed a gentle hand on your arm, giving it a light squeeze.

"You did what you could. What you have to do now is be there for the people who are still here. Your friends sister needs you. She needs someone familiar. Someone close to Sam and someone who was there in his last moments." Carol said, watching you.

"You'll never get back up if you keep knocking yourself down." She said softly. You let out a shakey sigh, nodding and sniffling. Carol offered you a napkin, patting your back before she walked away. You wiped away your tears and splashed some water on your face, patting your face dry. You turned and grabbed the broom and collector, taking care of the glass. You put the first aid kit away as Carol re-entered the room with Natasha and Steve following.

"Hey, we usually do things as a team here." Natasha said as Carol spun around to look at her.

"We realize up there is your territory but this is our fight too." Steve added.

"Do you even know where he is?" Rhodes asked, head tilting. Carol shrugged lightly.

"I know people who might."

"Don't bother." You looked at the blue android girl, Nebula.

"I can tell you where Thanos is." She revealed. The humans glanced at each other before gathering in the office to hear what she had to say. You leaned against the doorway, semi interested.

"Thanos spent a long time trying to perfect me. When he worked he talked about his great plan. Even disassembled I wanted to please him.. I'd ask where we would go once his plan was complete. His answer was always the same." Nebula turned her head to look at everyone. "To the garden."

"That's cute. Thanos has a retirement plan." Rhodes mumbled as Rocket climbed onto the table, making a hologram of Earth appear.

"When Thanos snapped his fingers, Earth became ground zero for ridiculously high cosmic proportions. Nobody's ever seen anything like it." Rocket said, making the hologram change to a different planet.

"Until two days ago on this planet." Rocket motioned to the planet shown. Nebula nodded, leaning forward.

"He used the stones again." Natasha whispered. Everyones attention shifted onto the planet.

"You can count me out. I have a therapy session soon." You called, turning around and walking down the steps.

"You go to therapy?" Rhodes asked, brows furrowing as he turned to face you.

"Yeah, it's called napping."

~~~~~~~~~~

You entered the house, taking in a deep breath. Neither you or Clint dared clean up the place. Everything was left exactly how it had been left after Thanos snapped his fingers. You entered the livingroom, gaze landing on the metal on the ground. You sighed softly, picking up the monitor. Clint had broken it. Clint not following the rules of his house arrest was probably the least of the governments problems. You tossed it onto the couch, walking to the kitchen and opening the fridge.

"Beer, beer, beer, leftovers, beer." You mumbled as you sorted through the fridge. You shut the fridge, looking at the drawings and pictures pinned to it with magnets. You swallowed, leaving the kitchen. You stepped over the Legos on the ground, going to the front door. You watched as Clint drew an arrow, shooting it at a target in the distance. All Clint did was practice. Probably to get his mind off things.

"Should I head into town for food?" You called out. Clint stayed silent so you took it as a no. You took out your phone, looking at the contact.

Sarah Wilson

You watched it ring, guilt creeping into your heart. You sighed, licking your lips and answering.

"Hello?"

"Oh, thank god! I've been trying to reach you for the past few weeks. I haven't heard anything yet about Sam and the others. How is Sam? Is he with you?"

"Sam.." You started, biting down on your lip as you shut your eyes. You let out a heavy sigh, taking a seat on the stairs.

"I should explain everything in person, Sarah. I'm not gonna make you wait until I get to Louisiana. Sam.. He, uh.. He didn't make it. I'm s-sorry." You sniffled, hearing a soft gasp leave Sarah.

"Oh, God.." She whispered.

"I-I'll stop by. I tell you everything but.. Sam.. Sam was a hero until the end." You said softly, hearing the kids in the background. You were relieved she wasn't completely alone.

"C-Could you just stay with me on the phone?" Sarah asked softly.

"Yeah, of course." You replied, answering her softly cry.

"What the hell am I gonna do now? Half the folks in town are gone and.." Sarah sniffled. You listened to her soft sniffles and sobs, sighing softly.

"I'm not gonna leave you, Sarah. Sam would have my head if I did." You smiled softly, hearing her chuckle.

"Thank you."

[narakurosaki]

Edwin prompt: ed has recurring nightmares of the stuff he's seen

im sorry this took me longer than expected! i hope you enjoy nonetheless.

summary: ed struggles with a reoccurring nightmare. thankfully, winry is there to comfort him.

rating: t

words: 2202

read on ao3!

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He feels as though he’s traversing through thick mud, hardening around his ankles. It cakes within the ankle joint of his automail leg, cementing him in place. He breaks free, using what strength he has left to continue down the road. The Rockbell home inches further and further away; he reaches out, as though he could grasp the building and hold it in place. Its just out of his reach. He screams out her name but receives no response.

Suddenly, he’s bursting through the front door, his shoulder aching from the impact. His eyes jump around his surroundings, searching for a sign of life. He calls out her name, again receiving no response.

His automail breaks down with each step, nuts, bolts, and screws falling to the ground. The plating disintegrates, the intricate work beneath exposed; the wires snap, and he crumbles before the kitchen door. Again, he calls her name, and again, he receives no response.

The kitchen door slowly creaks open. He drags himself across the floor, mumbling her name repeatedly. His fingertips dig into the splintering floorboards until bloodied. He crawls deeper inside, leaving behind a trail of blood. The kitchen is dark, a sole ray of light illuminating only a small section beside the dining table. An apple rolls into his path, followed by another, and another. One stains itself in his blood. His stomach churns.

“Winry?”

A pained moan rings in his ears.

In the light he sees Winry facedown on the floor, a basket toppled on its side beside her, apples spilling out endlessly. Her arm is stretched out, almost as though she’s reaching for him, her head angled enough for him to see her eyes peeking through her bangs. “Ed…”

The sharp edges of what’s left of his leg dig into the wood flooring, the strength of his thigh and core working together to propel him forward. His chin hits the ground beside her. “I’m here, Winry,” he palms her back, searching for any trace of injury. He comes up empty. “I’m here.”

“You didn’t keep your promise, Ed…”

“What are you—”

Beneath her, the Eye of God opens. Her lifeless body falls into the darkness; Ed is swallowed alongside her. Everything goes black; he cannot move, cannot see, cannot hear; cannot speak. He falls for what feels like an eternity until he is spit out on the empty streets of Central.

The broken down armor that was once his little brother lies unmoving. Edward crawls towards the metal scraps, halted only by the agonizing pain in his right shoulder. Blood trickles down his arm, seeing through the wounds created by the bits of his automail port left behind. “Al!” he cries out. “Alphonse!”

In his own blood, Edward draws a human transmutation circle. “Give him back!” His hands clap together. “He’s my little brother!”

…but nothing happens.

“No!” He claps again. “Come on!” And again. “Shit!” And again. “Shit, shit, shit!”

“Big… brother?”

“Al!” He turns toward the voice. “Thank God you’re—”

White, lifeless eyes stare back at him. The creature’s teeth are bared, muzzle stretching in what appears to be a smile. Its brown hair flowers down its back, a contrast against its white fur.

The blood drains from Edward’s face.

“Ed… ward…” The chimera nudges him with its snout. “Wanna… play?”

Before he has time to react, his surroundings vanish into a blinding white; the armor and the chimera are gone. He vomits onto the floor as a laughter echoed around him.

“So, you couldn’t save them, after all.” Truth’s mouth spreads into a sickening grin. “Such is the life of an ordinary human.”

Edward coughs. “I did, though. I did! I beat that bearded bastard and gave you my alchemy for my brother!”

“Ah, did you?” Truth tilts its head. It taps a flesh finger against its chin. “You must have forgotten. I am what one may refer to as God; I am the world and the universe; I am all and I am one; and, most importantly—” it points its flesh finger at Edward “—I am you, and I can do as I please.”

Edward struggles to push himself up and off of the ground. He manages to place his weight in his left forearm, but when he goes to move his right, he can no longer feel the muscles and tendons move beneath his skin. His eyes widen.

His arm has been torn from his body by the Truth.

Ed collapses in a puddle of his own blood as the Truth’s laughter rings in his ears.

———

He wakes with a start, bolting upright in bed, his skin slick and clammy from a cold sweat. His heart beats wildly in his chest and he struggles to catch his breath. He reaches instinctively for his left leg; his hands grasp at cool metal. He turns his attention to his right, daring to move his arm. He feels the muscles moving beneath his skin, watches his hand and forearm come into view. He makes a fist.

He turns his attention to the woman lying on her side beside him. She looks so peaceful—she always did when she slept—but he cannot shake the image of her lifeless body on the floor. He reaches out and positions his hand beneath her nose. He sighs, content when he feels the air leaving her lungs as she breathes out. He moves a strand of hair out of her face. She begins to stir.

“Mm…” Her eyes open slowly, blue eyes peeking through long lashes. The image of her in his night terror flashes before his eyes. “What’re you doin’ up?”

Edward forces a smile. “Bad dream. Go back to sleep.”

Winry blinks, squints, and yawns before draping an arm over Edward’s waist. She pulls herself toward him and rests her head atop his chest. Her palm lies flat against his pec, fingers splaying and unintentionally brushing against his nipple. He shudders. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Not really.”

He takes her in his arms, fingertips tracing invisible patterns across her bare shoulder. She pushes herself up, blue eyes boring into gold. Even in the dark, he sees a fire behind them. “It isn’t a bad thing to talk about what scares you, Ed. It’ll help you feel better.”

Would it, he wonders. He’d been haunted by nightmares since his and his little brother’s failed attempt at human transmutation. He’d never spoken of what plagued him, not even with Alphonse, though Edward always had an inkling that his armored brother knew. He’d been hopeful, assuming the terrors would vanish after restoring Al to his original body, but he had been dead wrong. He’d woke in a panic in his hospital room, mistaking the IV in his arm for the metal that kept him pinned to the rubble, vulnerable to Father’s deadly blows and tore it from his flesh. His nurse had rushed in, and though he had assured her that he was okay, the look in his eye said otherwise. She’d pushed an anti-anxiety medication into his veins after reinserting his IV, and he had fallen into a dreamless sleep.

Returning home hadn’t stopped the nightmares, either. Edward had fallen victim to a false sense of security, only to be terrorized on a rainy night, two weeks later. He’d sat in the dark, clutching his aching leg and listening to Alphonse’s soft snoring. He wouldn’t burden his little brother with his demons; and, just because he’s in Winry’s bed, he wouldn’t burden her, either.

But she’d asked him to share, and Ed could hardly believe it.

This woman, this beautiful smartass, gearheaded, crazy wonder of a woman had fallen for a broken man, and all she wanted to do was make him feel safe.

Dammit. He really was a lucky man.

He tilts his head and worries at his bottom lip. He fills his lungs, holds the breath, and exhales slowly. It’s his tell that he’ll talk, and Winry is content to lie back against him. He threads his fingers through her hair. “I couldn’t save Amestris. I couldn’t—” he sucks in a breath, his heart thumping against his ribcage. The dark of night mimics that of the Rockbell home in his dream. He bends his left leg and runs his fingertips along his metal port. “My leg broke down when I tried to get to you. I had to crawl but you—” He bites down on the tip of his tongue. The fire in Winry’s eyes has been smothered by his words. She looks at him with worry, and a familiar feeling bubbles in his gut. He’s burdening her, making her worry. Every fiber of his being screams for him to shut his mouth, to spare her the details…

…but the love in his fiancée’s eyes silences those screams. Something about the woman lying atop his chest urges him to share everything on his mind, from the most trivial thoughts to his darkest fears. He feels safe in her presence—he always has.

He takes a moment to breathe. Winry cups his cheek and he leans into her touch.

“…you told me I’d failed. I didn’t know what you meant, but we were both swallowed by the portal.” He closes his eyes, doing his best to rid his mind of the image of her lifeless body falling into the void. “Next thing I knew, I was in Central. Al’s armor wasn’t moving—I had to relive when he transmuted his soul in exchange for my arm. I tried… I tried so hard to bring him back, but my alchemy…” Another deep breath. Winry’s thumb moves soothingly back and forth against his skin. He swallows the lump in his throat. Nina comes to mind—he’d beaten Shou Tucker bloody, cursed himself for being unable to save an innocent little girl. She haunts him to this day, and Edward swears she will until his dying breath.

“I heard a voice call out for their big brother.” His voice shakes on the last two words, his hand gripping her shoulder tightly. “I thought it was Al, but when I turned to look…”

The story of a little girl turned chimera by her alchemist father wasn’t news to Winry. Edward had shared the horrifying details on a rainy night, when the pain in his leg and the thoughts brought on by the rain had been too much to bear. He’d cried that night, and, in turn, so did she. He had seen the good in alchemy, he’d explained to her, but he’d also seen the bad, and the bad outweighed the good in his eyes.

“What happened after that?”

He’s thankful for the woman he holds in his arms. She never forces him to discuss things that bring him despair. She’s quick to change the subject when it’s clear that he’s grown far too uncomfortable.

“The Truth,” he divulges quickly. While the Truth, itself, didn’t bother him, it was the ability it possessed to take. It had taken his arm and his leg; it had taken his little brother’s body; it had taken his teacher’s reproductive organs; and it had taken General Mustang’s eyesight. The Truth took what it pleased when alchemists played god. “It took you and Al from me, and it took back my arm and watched me bleed out on the floor. That’s when—”

“You woke up.”

“Yeah.”

He loosens his grip on her shoulder and steals a glance of her skin. His nails have left indentations. He looks back at the ceiling and drags his fingertips across her shoulder blade, dipping his hand into the back of her tank-top. Winry’s breathing beside his ear serves as a constant reminder than what he’d experienced was just an unfortunate trick of the mind, a side-effect of the trauma he’d experienced from a young age. He fills his lungs.

“Well,” she begins, “I’m here.”

He hugs her to his body and kisses the crown of her head. “I know.”

“And Al is here, too.”

That’s right, he was. Alphonse, his little brother, was asleep in his bed down the hall.

“You succeeded that day, Ed,” Winry pushes herself up to look him in the eye. There’s a softness in her voice. “You gave the souls of the Amestrians back, you defeated Father, and you brought Al back to us.” She cups his cheek tenderly, a soft smile on her lips. The blue of her eyes is piercing, and Edward never wants to look away. “You saved the country and fulfilled your promise. There’s nothing bad, anymore. There’s only good.”

She leans down to capture his lips in a kiss. They move in perfect synchronization, movements slow and deliberate. Winry’s tongue enters his mouth; he nibbles on her bottom lip; hands explore each other’s bodies until Winry straddles him and holds his face in her hands. He lifts her shirt over her head and loses himself completely.

She was right, the worst of his life was behind him. He’d returned his brother to his body, he’d found love with his best friend, and he’d been permitted to retire from the military to live a simpler life. There was only good ahead of him.

[fangirl-everythang]

Happy Father's Day Part 3

Summary: 3/3 Well, its the last part.

Warning: Sad, Mentions Death.

Word Count: 2269

"Harry? " I answer the phone.

"It's not Harry but glad you know your numbers." that high pitch annoying ass voice squeals. Rubbing my stomach, the baby's in go position and any day now my oven will be done baking. And of course, this bitch is answering his phone.

"Well bye-bye just thought you should know where he was at. " In the background, I hear Harry's voice going on about something so it must be true. Hanging up I sigh letting the hot tears roll down my cheeks. Stupid, stupid, stupid. I blame myself really, I let him back into my life and this doesn't surprise me. I gotta pee.

Waddling over to the bathroom door a gasp leaves my mouth feeling the surge of liquids fall between my legs. Holy shit. My water broke! Fuck gotta go. Thankful my bag was already in the car. Harry had insisted once I hit the 36-week mark claiming Styles's are either early or fashionably late.

Ouch. Ouch. Ouch. My knuckles turning white as I grasp the wheel. Nope, I'm not pushing anything out of my vagina. Can't do it. I refuse.

The contraction going away after a few brief moments of completely unreasonable pain. Dialing the numbers, I know by second nature, thankfully she picks up on the fourth ring.

"I don't think you should drive y/n"

" Just call 911. I'm almost there! " Gemma ecstatically shouts. She's just like her brother, "Where's Harrold? "

I put the seatbelt on and wince. It's just 28 minutes I can do this. "He's with his whore."

I can hear an audible gasp, "he wouldn't he's so excited for Athena"

"Well I just called him and she answered. " I grunt keeping my eyes on the two lanes ahead of me. Fuck I hate merging lanes people don't know how to drive.

"I'll be at the hospital as soon as possible but my phones gonna-" the line went dead. She did say she was on like 10% oh well.

I can do this just focus y/n. "Hear that baby girl we're almost there, hang on okay Hunny. " I say as a reminder to myself that soon I'll be leaving with another human with me.

6 miles to go that's what I'm talking about, another sharp pain spreads throughout my abdomen while waiting for the light to turn green. "OH COME ON. FOR FUCKS SAKE!" they're getting closer by the minute. Shit. Arriving at a four-way intersection. I'm relieved to be at a red light, the contractions are longer and much more frequent. "Almost there Athena, this is the last light and a straight shot from there."

Abruptly my car is jerked forward with a sharp impact pushing to the oncoming lights. All I see are lights from both directions colliding with my 3,000-pound piece of metal. Sounds of shattering glass and sirens are the last thing I hear before it all fades to black.

||||||||||||||||

Harry's POV

"Has anyone seen Mr. Style's phone?" The helpful aid asked around the dressing room. I could've sworn I put it down for a moment. Y/n could go into labor any minute now and how I am supposed to know. Fuck. I'm stupid.

I was supposed to be here to perform and list nominees and then go back home to y/n. I can't wait to propose to her, she's all I could ever want and she's giving me the most wonderful gift I could ever ask for. Running a hand through my damp hair, the lights really build a sweat, I hear a familiar voice. "Looking for this lover? " she asks slipping my phone into my pocket.

"Good luck at home. " she smiles and winks. Before I could question it she walks away.

Looking down at the device my heart skips a beat, I have 146 missed calls. And I've been gone for 5 hours. Seeing Gemma's name on the screen again I swipe to answer.

"Hell-"

"Harry," she says sniffling.

"Gemma what's wrong? did I miss it? Oh my god I hope not"

"I think it would be best if you came now Harry." she breaks her voice cracking.

"Gem what?"

"Listen Harry, she needs you right now so please." she cries. Not needing another word, I tell Jackson the address and that I need to be there as fast as possible, 45 minutes later we're pulling into the Labor and Delivery section of the hospital.

"Congrats Harry!" Jackson says letting me out at the door. "Thank you!" I beam back at him.

Seeing Gemma, her eyes are puffy with tears still flowing. "Gem what's wro-," a sharp pain to my right cheek stings. Never has Gemma hit me like that, well not since I cut her prom dress. "How could you Harry? Cheat on her again WITH TAYLOR for Christ sakes!" She yells.

"I didn't cheat," I explain to my sister as calm as I can.

She looks at me with wild eyes pulling me into a hallway with fewer people, "Then what happened Harrold?" I clench my jaw instead of speaking, how dare she accuse me of cheating on my pregnant soon-to-be fiancé. Y/n Styles has a great catch don't you think?

"Is she here yet? Gem where are they?" I ask ready to see my new family.

She begins crying again "Harry there was an accident." Those five words make my breathing come to a halt. My heart shatters in a million pieces "Is Y/n okay? What happened?" She begins walking me to a door. "This one," she points. Looking through the glass I see y/n with bruises and cuts to her beautiful face, her stomach nearly deflated from when I last saw her this morning, a cast on a swollen leg of hers, and a sling holding a very damaged arm. Tears brim at my eyes looking at my love on that hospital bed. "She's awake." Gemma walks past me running to the outside.

I gently knock on the door, waiting for a response which I don't get. "Y/n?" I approach her almost as If I were going to help an injured puppy. "Hey love" I smile at her which she glares at me and then turns wincing in pain. "You wanted this didn't you Harry?" I look at her confused. "This is probably great for you, a way out. Well leave." She states using whatever energy she can find.

"Baby I didn't want- I want you and Athena" She breaks down in uncontrollable tears.

"You were with that her and couldn't even bother to pick up your phone!" she screams. "Y/n I wasn-" a knock at the door interrupts my sentence, "Come in" She says glaring at me as a nurse opens the door.

"Hey there Mama, we have a visitor." the nurse wheel in a tiny cart that has a bunch of equipment coming from it. She looks at me and asks Y/n, "Is this dad?" she nods and rolls her eyes. "About time you made it!" She smiles my way. Placing the beautiful baby in front of us. She's so small and fragile. "The doctor will be in shortly to talk to you." She states picking up the tiny child and putting her in Y/n's arm.

"Hi pumpkin," Y/n coos into her ear. "Guess who decided to show?" She smiles, a tear falling from the corner of her eye. She nods her head towards me as I go to hold her. She's so soft and precious. Her small eyes have a gorgeous mix of both mine and Y/n's. She has such a cute round face, I couldn't imagine her looking any different.

"Hi there angel, I'm so sorry I was late." I see a spot dampen on her blanket that surrounds her, knowing that I'm crying. Her small eyes shining like twinkling stars. So small I can feel her fragile body between my large hands.

Another knock before the door opens when several doctors walk in. "Mrs. Y/ln, unfortunately, we have some bad news,"

"Oh, hello there Mr. Styles." They state acknowledging my existence. One of the female doctors places a black and white image on the lighted board illuminating the small figure.

"Unfortunately, due to the accident, Athena has suffered from what we call a fetomaternal hemorrhage."

"What exactly are you saying?" Y/n ask looking at the child still in my arms.

The slightly shorter male doctor points to the image. "This is an abscess of blood in the brain. Unfortunately, the risk is too large to operate. I'd give her another day at most."

"You m-mean," Tears start pouring down her face" I was so scared she was hurt. I-I promise I saw the light it was red, and I-I stopped but," She began heaving losing more air with each word. I gently rub her back as I cradle Athena with one arm.

"She's still being monitored but I'm afraid she won't have much longer." The first doctor breaks the silence. "According to the police report the car that struck you from behind happened to be a drunk driver, Gage Joyce." I can feel the anger surging through me. "I remember the clashing of metal, glass breaking, the sirens but it all went b-black." She mumbles, seemingly remembering the awful experience. I grab her hand in hopes of comforting her but it doesn't seem to work.

"After striking your car at 72 mph it had ample force to push your vehicle into the opposite traffic. Your vehicle took the most impact and was hit by four other cars. On scene, EMT's said you were in and out of consciousness mumbling about a baby. Taken and brought to the L&D." he finishes.

"Fetomaternal hemorrhages are often caused by trauma and sometimes can be revered but in this case, we've done all we can do." They all frown looking at the small girl still in my arms.

"No, there's got to be more you can bloody do! We're in a hospital for Christ sakes!" I exclaim, passing my daughter to the love of my life. She gently caresses her soft skin. She's literally a perfect combination of us. I cannot lose my family.

"You can leave, thank you all for your help." y/n says quietly, they oblige by her wishes and leave us with our daughter.

"Harry," she wipes a tear from her face cautious of the IV placed on her hand, "If what they say is true, I just want to spend time with her." She sniffles. I nod understanding. She looks back at the small being in her arms, "Hi pretty girl, Mommy's so happy to meet you," she unfolds the blanket from her. I sit next to her on the small bed in the room that smells of sterilization. Placing my finger near hers' she wraps her small hand around my thumb, her grip so tight for someone so small. Y/n kisses her forehead, "Harry," she runs her finger along her small legs.

"Can you sing the song?" nodding and softly singing Isn't she Lovely by Stevie Wonder, in the small hospital bed as our new life falls asleep. All night I watch her little chest rise and fall allowing y/n to get some rest soon following my two loves.

By the early morning, nurses are rushing in because of the loud beeping from the monitor, waking y/n and I. It feels like everything is happening so fast but in slow motion right in front of me. Those three words are the ones I didn't want to hear. "No! no. I have to take her home. She's gotta go home..." Y/n screams, not being able to see her face due to the tears in my eyes falling and rebuilding themselves faster than the speed of light. "Call it." One of the nurses shouts.

"Time of Death 6:18 am March 7th, 2019"

As they cleared out the room, I see her small lifeless body curled into a blanket, almost as if she were sleeping, but no longer do breaths fall from her small heart-shaped lips.

//////////////////////////

Y/n hasn't said a word since we got in the car. It's been four days since we lost Athena. She slowly climbs into the car, still sore from the accident and birth. I go to the backseat holding back my emotions and putting the empty car-seat in the trunk of the car that should have been holding three of us.

Starting the silent journey back home she continues to look out of the window, a frown etched on her mouth, tears rolling down her cheeks as she instinctively touches her somewhat deflated stomach. What kind of sick joke is this?

"Harry why were you with her?" she asks me looking down at what used to be her baby bump.

"I wasn't love, she took my phone while I was on stage." She just nods and remains silent until we pull up to the flat. She begins walking up the stairs as best she can. "Y/n wait, let me help."

"No Harry!" She yells. Pain evident in her voice, ignoring her I open the door and help her inside. "Harry I can't do this." I stare at her confused, "What can't you do y/n?"

"Us Harry. I can't look at you and not think of her." She sobs.

"Y/n we can-" I try to reason with her.

"No Harry, please just go." She whispers.

"I'm not losing both of you," I state holding back my own sobs. I feel like everything feels like it's getting smaller around me, suffocating in grief.

"You already have."

A/N: What can I say I have a thing for dark endings. Anyways I really appreciate the support loves. I hope you enjoy these! Right now I've been working on a Loki piece, I'm so excited for it. I changed the writing style tho, so it's not 1st person per usual. I think it's going pretty well so far.

xoxo Janelle

[richmond-rex]

What do you think Henry VII remembers, if anything, of his other uncle Henry VI?

This is such an interesting question and something that I myself have been wondering, so thank you for providing me with the opportunity to expand my thoughts on here 🌹

We know that Henry VII only ever saw his uncle King Henry VI once during his life, when he was 13 years old. However, I’d argue King Henry must have caused quite a great impression on him, and considering Henry Tudor was old enough at that time, also a profoundly lasting one. So far young Henry Earl of Richmond had been living as a ward of his uncle Jasper’s enemies, the Herberts. By 1470 his old guardian, William Herbert, had been executed, and then, as the Earl of Warwick changed sides and brought about Henry VI’s readeption, Henry Tudor was returned to his uncle Jasper who took him to London to meet King Henry VI. That Jasper felt like acquainting his nephew with his brother denotes a special degree of closeness and advocates for his idea of family, in my opinion.

According to André, Henry VII’s court poet and self-styled regius historiographus, on 27 October 1470 Henry VI held ‘a splendid feast with the nobles and best men of the kingdom’ to commemorate his return to the throne. As the king was washing his hands, young Richmond was brought to his presence, and according to André, ‘the king prophesied that someday the boy would undertake the governance of the kingdom and would have all things under his own power.’ Polydore Vergil, a historian that began his service under Henry VII in 1506, wrote in his Three Books that in that 1470 meeting ‘the king... is reported to have said:’

“This truly, this is he unto whom both we and our adversaries must yield and give over the dominion.”

It seems not even Vergil lends much credence to this tale as expressed by his choice of words: reported to have said. As expected, this myth has largely been viewed as Tudor propaganda and indeed the episode has been immortalised in Shakespeare’s Henry VI part III. In the play, King Henry VI meets a toddler Henry Richmond (then escorted by Somerset), calls him ‘England’s hope’, and says Richmond was ‘Likely in time to bless a regal throne’. Given that King Henry VI had his own son Prince Edward as his heir at the time, it seems unlikely he would ever have said such a thing. However, if anything remotely close to that happened, then I agree with Leanda de Lisle in saying that it must have been King Henry VI taking Henry Tudor to be his own son Edward, who thanks to his imprisonment in the Tower he had not seen for five years (and would not ever see again). It’s absurdly sad to think King Henry VI would confound his nephew with his son but arguably also not out of the realm of possibility. We don’t know if Henry Tudor saw his uncle King Henry again, but it’s also not unlikely that he, his mother and uncle Jasper stayed at court for the feast of All Hallows’ (1 November) and All Souls’ Day (2 November).

If King Henry VI ever made such prophecy, wittingly or not, then it must have greatly impacted on Henry Tudor. Henry VII believed to have been chosen by God to, against all odds, become king of England. He once wrote about ‘the crown which it has pleased God to give us with the victory over our enemy at our first field’. Henry Tudor was reported to be very pious—he made pilgrimages to the shrine of St Thomas Becket at Canterbury every Easter, as well as frequent pilgrimages to the shrine of Our Lady of Walsingham and donations to the shrine of St Vincent Ferrer in Brittany. He also founded the cult of the Breton saint St Armel in England and boosted the teachings of St Francis by his patronage of the Franciscan order. He especially favoured the Observants (the Franciscans, also known as the Greyfriars), granting them annuities for the establishment of monasteries in England and abroad. It seems he also favoured staying at religious houses when travelling or going on progress around the kingdom.

Most importantly, Henry VII held a singular devotion to the Virgin Mary and his adoption of the red rose as his personal symbol—aside from dynastic reasons—had everything to do with the religious connotations of that flower. Henry VII could have associated himself with his uncle Henry VI by adopting his antelope badge, for example, but instead, he chose the five-petal flower associated with the Virgin Mary and the Passion of Christ. The Franciscans were noted for their devotion to the Passion, and Henry VII had come in contact with the Observants during his exile in Brittany. The rose had five petals like the five wounds of Christ—St Bernard of Clairvaux once stated: “As many wounds as there are on the Saviour’s body, so many roses are there! Look at His feet and His hands; do you not see roses?” 

Forgive me for still going on a tangent about it, but Henry VII’s personal devotion to the Virgin Mary and the doctrine of her Immaculate Conception is exemplified in his Book of Hours, where a miniature shows a figure representing the king kneeling at a prayer desk before a vision of the Virgin as a baby held by her mother, St Anne (or, alternatively, The Virgin and the Child Jesus). His devotion to the Virgin was also highlighted in his rebuilding of the Lady Chapel (now Henry VII’s Chapel) at Westminster Abbey which I will return to in a moment.

I’m not sure but I think it was Vergil who reported Henry VII as having said that religion was his ‘continual refuge’ during exile. His piety has been largely attributed to the influence of his mother Margaret Beaufort, herself also a very pious woman. But given how many years—and formative years those were—they spent apart, I imagine that Henry must have looked up to someone closer to him at the time, namely his uncle Jasper Tudor. We know that after the death of Catherine of Valois Jasper and his brother Edmund were raised by nuns at Barking Abbey, and that then at some point they joined King Henry VI’s court. According to John Blacman, Henry VI’s biographer and chaplain writing in 1485:

[…] and like pains did [Henry VI] apply in the case of his half-brothers, the Lords Jasper and Edmund, in their boyhood and youth; providing for them most strict and safe guardianship, putting them under the care of virtuous and worthy priests, both for teaching and for right living and conversation, lest the untamed practices of youth should grow rank if they lacked any to prune them.

Blacman also claimed that the king personally protected his half-brothers from sexual temptation by keeping ‘careful watch through hidden windows of his chamber’ (yes, I know). Like his uncle King Henry VI, Henry VII would also set a court that ‘maintained the highest standards of sexual behaviour’. Indeed, Retha Warnicke made an extensive compilation of scandals during the first two Tudor reigns and not a single case of sexual misconduct was found to have taken place during Henry VII’s time, marking his court as a decidedly different one than Edward IV’s had been.

Going back to Henry VI’s supposed prophecy, his words surely must have acquired a great weight in Henry Tudor’s mind by 1483 when he made his bid to the English throne. By that time King Henry VI had become a popular saint in England and even though Edward IV had tried to have him modestly—and somewhat obscurely—buried in Chertsey Abbey, Surrey, people had started to flock to his grave. A peasant claimed that Henry VI helped him when he had a bean trapped in his ear, which only popped out after he prayed to the king. Painted images of King Henry VI began showing up in churches around the country, like this one at Barton in Norfolk:

One of King Henry VI’s most ardent devotees was Henry Tudor’s mother Margaret Beaufort (Jasper’s feelings towards the cult are unknown) who had met her kinsman when she was about nine years old. When King Henry VI allegedly offered her the option of remaining married to Suffolk’s son or be remarried to his brother Edmund, Margaret says St Nicholas came to her in a dream dressed as a bishop, telling her to choose Edmund. Again, if this story is true or not, we may never know, but Margaret told that to her confessor John (bishop, then saint) Fisher—why would a famously pious woman such as Margaret Beaufort lie to her own confessor, thus committing a sin? It might be that the events took a mystical turn in Margaret’s imagination as a young girl, but that she associated divine intervention to hers and her son’s fate, and likewise to King Henry VI’s proposal, is clear.

It seems Richard III tried to control King Henry VI’s ever-growing cult by moving Henry VI’s body from Chertsey Abbey to St George’s Chapel at Windsor, a place where visitors wouldn’t have easy access to the king. Nevertheless, when Henry VII came to the throne he wholeheartedly encouraged pilgrimages to the place. Henry VII launched an official campaign to have his uncle canonised, with several petitions to popes Innocent VIII, Alexander VI and Julius II. Henry also ordered the compilation of a book of miracles worked by his uncle, and a biography of Henry VI was published in 1500 claiming that Henry VI had been ever pious and chaste during his life, towards his queen never behaving ‘unseemly ... but with all conjugal honesty and gravity’. Henry VII planned to have the body of King Henry VI re-interred at the heart of the new Lady Chapel he was planning at Westminster Abbey. 

However much Henry VII enjoyed good relations with the papacy, especially Pope Innocent VIII, his campaign to have his uncle King Henry VI canonised never came into fruition. Henry VII decided for him and his wife to be buried at his new Lady Chapel instead, next to the tomb of his grandmother Queen Catherine of Valois. In his will, he stated his wish for his body to be buried:

“in the Chapell where our said graunt Dame laye buried, the which Chapell we have begoune to buylde of newe, in the honour of our blessed Lady.”

That doesn’t mean Henry VII set aside the memory of his uncle King Henry VI. He employed the same man that was overseeing the construction of the Lady Chapel at Westminster, Reginald Bray, to continue the rebuilding of St George’s Chapel at Windsor set in motion by his predecessor Edward IV (it came to be informally known as the Bray Chapel). The modest thirteenth-century chapel of Edward the Confessor was expanded into a vast cathedral-like chapel where, importantly, Henry VI’s body was placed alongside a famous relic, the fragment of the True Cross (a reliquary known as the Cross of Gneth) and the bones of John Schorne (revered for curing gout and toothache).

We may argue that Henry VII’s campaign to have King Henry VI’s canonised was fundamentally political (much like Richard II’s campaign for Edward II) as many historians have done. King Henry VI as a saint, combined with his supposed prophecy, would successfully contribute to the image of Henry VII’s reign as one chosen by God. When we put Henry VII’s religious devotion into perspective, though, his efforts to have ‘the glorious King Henry’ canonised take another dimension—in fact, there’s no doubt that in Henry VII’s eyes God had intervened in his favour. Henry VII’s will also stated his wish for an image of himself to be placed in St Edward’s chapel at Westminster, depicting him returning to God and the Virgin Mary the circlet with which he had been crowned at the Battle of Bosworth.

This is me purely speculating, but I think that even though Henry VII only came in contact with King Henry VI once in his life, his half-uncle might have exercised a great influence on him through his uncle Jasper. Jasper seemed to have been genuinely attached to his brother Henry on a personal level as well as devoted to his political cause. If Henry VI’s saintly qualities had been enough to impress Margaret Beaufort, it is very likely that they might have impressed young Henry of Richmond as well.

[shewasanamericangirl]

screamin bout zi-o 36

i had fun doing this last week, so let’s make another screencap post! of course, i said that, and then it took several days to upload all the pictures because tumblr just stops fucking working sometimes. anyhoo! it’s yuko kitajima roast hour. image-heavy and spoiler-heavy, naturally.

so ginga blew everyone up and they ran away to a sewer it seems.

honestly that theory makes as much sense as anything else on this booty ass fuckin’ kamen rider show

i was just like...he isn’t

but then he was

swartz: she could step on me in those red pumps and i’d say Thank You

hora: i regret so much right now

uhr: *shonen anime character walking down the street pose*

then over quartzer plays and im starting to feel a little lost because i don’t get to hear about the episode according to woz’s book? hello??

yuko’s still out gettin her spa treatments and shit, god only knows how she got the money for all that, and somehow she never crosses paths with the cops or anyone who recognizes her from the news?? uh

honestly yeah?? a queen deserves to look GOOD. her theme music is eerily sexy, i need an mp3 of it right now

don’t get me wrong, im well aware that swartz is being a suck-up to try and get yuko to help with his plan to seize ginga’s power, but damn im kinda shipping swartz with yuko now too...i mean, he WAS looking at her while doing the sexy ice cream thing last week. what flavor ice cream would yuko be? black cherry chip maybe?

(headcanon: woz tries apple pie ice cream and declares it a crime against both apple pie and ice cream alike--but he still eats the whole coneful)

hora and uhr get ZA WARUDO’D down the stairs by swartz

we were all uhr right here

yeaaaaaah she just doesn’t want to fight ginga

tsukuyomi’s a mood. someone put a band-aid on geiz’s forehead pls

ok woz i get that if you’re looking for a despotic ruler to follow that yuko is likely a better bet than sougo, but you’re missing an important detail: if yuko actually had a shot at becoming queen of everything, she’d already have one of you in tow, and you would most likely hate each other.

...majou means “demon queen” in this case, not “witch”, right?

aaaaaand this...is the moment when yuko started making me very uncomfortable. the way she responds: “yes...i do remember. it’s you.”

and sougo’s face just lights up--my guy, she could so easily be lying. she didn’t say one thing about the band-aid or the playground or anything that’d indicate she’s actually sougo’s crush.

like...if not for the fact that sougo had such a crush on the seifuku girl, it wouldn’t be all that major a memory. it likely wasn’t for the girl in question--just a happy sunny day cheering up a lonely little boy. a beautiful memory, yes...but memories fade.

can someone please explain to me why woz’s characterization is all over the place in kiva arc? are you pro-yuko or anti-yuko, woz? i don’t understand what’s going through his pretty head at all honestly. he gets pretty taciturn in the scenes he’s not inhaling pie, but then at times he seems to think yuko’s cool aaaaaagh i don’t know

junichiro: meowing, just wanted an excuse to cook lots of food

sougo: “yay, uncle’s cooking!”

woz: [deadpan monotone] “yaaaaaaay uncle’s cooking...”

ive had enough of this evil bitch honestly but when she points it’s still Good Shit

ridiculous move name, but also an awesome move name

and turning to stone to heal up while the sun’s clouded over? very cool

denied

i noped so hard at this part. like...i really do feel protective of sougo. yuko doesn’t give a damn about him, she just doesn’t want him to get in her way.

nope. no. nuh uh. you two step away from each other right now.

YOU CANNOT MAKE BABIES WITH AN IDIOT FETUS

ok but in all seriousness, do you want time jackers? because, im calling it now, letting oma zi-o go in raw is how you get time jackers.

yeah im pretty sure miho would’ve kept at it if she’d lived, and yuko...shes not gonna listen to sougo

thank you for the much needed reality check furry man

so she’s a...fu-joshi? 👀

☝☝☝

yuko wears such fabulous shoes

was anyone surprised at this point that yuko was the real killer? i sure wasn’t. not after all the obvious lies.

i love her leitmotif. i need it. where do i download

SHE DIDN’T PROMISE SHIT

hey kids! it’s time for *mashes play button* la-la-la lies! yeah, tell me that you love me! la-la-la-lies! look deep into my eyes! la-la-la-lies! say there’s no one else above me! i’m the king of fools, cuz baby, you’re the queen of actually very hurtful and manipulative lies!

that’s such bullshit

now im the last person to be like “don’t play the dead mommy card”--i practically keep that card in the hello kitty wallet my dead mommy gave me. but i bet you yuko’s mom is just fine (aside from living with the trauma of knowing her daughter’s a murderer and pathological liar).

sougo,,,,,pls

thank you tsukuyomi. god sougo really needs a chaperone with yuko around, he’s way too dumb and thirsty.

GUESS WHO’S BACK. BACK AGAIN. fortunately, it seems swartz and woz have been just standing there watching him for the duration of the rain shower.

lest we forget (because i didn’t screencap it), when zi-o took the brunt of ginga’s attack earlier, it sent him flying. now, that’s a human body, which has some ability to absorb force because it’s mostly pretty soft and fluid. yuko’s manhole cover almost completely absorbed this blast--she barely shifted her weight on impact. is it just that she’s THAT ripped? 

then The Boys rider kick ginga to oblivion. rip ginga, you didn’t have a personality or a character arc, we never even saw you un-transformed--you were just a cool looking plot device with pretty attacks. but for that much, we appreciate you!

swartz looks so pleased with himself. he must not have watched the preview for this episode.

YOINK! gotta love how swartz doesn’t look surprised so much as puzzled.

sure am glad kurowoz took his other self’s advice and kept an eye on swartz

i love it so much how woz just has these magic scarf powers and it needs no explanation? hell, he can fly and time travel and make people fall asleep and he’s super strong too, with no explanation? and he’s the comic relief? ALSO HE’S REALLY HOT? woz is a being to behold honestly

speaking of super strong and really hot, yuko is KILLING IT in that gown. i mean...i guess that’s the intention. killing it. cuz she’s a homicidal maniac. haha.

she’s so good at pointing. yuko could be a prosecutor in shuichi kitaoka: ace attorney. (FUND IT)

yuko throws her manhole cover at the boys (rude!) and next we see geiz holding it. a shame we don’t get to see him snatch it out of midair. or did woz catch it and just hand it to him? we may never know.

zi-o. listen to geiz, zi-o. use the fucking watch. just use the watch, zi-o. you seriously plan on just letting another kiva go on a killing spree? do you not get by now what she’s capable of?

thank goodness zi-o has his retainers to make wise decisions so he doesn’t have to.

please note the placement of mars on ginga woz’s suit. very important.

I Love You

lmao

WHERE IS YOUR MANHOLE COVER NOW

my favorite character gets a beautiful rainbow final attack. i feel so blessed.

i mean...protecting all mankind would probably include protecting them from people like yuko. just sayin.

is it bad of me that my immediate thought right then was “at least woz’s attack wasn’t what did her in.”

this shot, especially in the context of the church, definitely gave me pieta vibes--albeit reversed somewhat.

weirdly enough, woz does an outro instead of an intro this episode.

at this point while watching, i said to shylax “you know what this calls for? pie!” but before i could finish--

--PIE! cmon sougo, it’s time to gobble up your feelings!

fucking woz, i swear, you have pie in your mouth and pie in your right hand and pie on your FACE and when your overlord expresses how miserable he is you just go for his uneaten pie with your empty hand.

...is it normal to eat pie like this in japan? because the only times i’ve seen americans make this much of a mess eating pie is when they’re toddlers.

oh hey, what do you know? looks like sougo’s first love wasn’t a violent crazy person after all. she also wasn’t yuko.

sougo’s just an idiot who will mistake any older woman who rubs him on the chin and calls him cute for his sailor girl.

previews!

i blame joshua kiryu

how eloquently this one line sums up not only kamen rider zi-o but kamen rider decade as well. that’s it, that’s the show. that’s the clusterfuck we will inevitably get whenever toei decides to make a kamen rider crossover.

LOOK AT THIS! TSUKUYOMI REMEMBERED SOMETHING! who is she smiling at? is it her dad? is that swartz behind her?! omg baby tsukuyomi is so CUTE!

“a team”. uh huh. is that what the youth are calling it these days? cuz when i was a wee lass, i believe they called it “fucking”.

so what have we learned this week?

very little about ginga

sougo does not remember faces all that well

before sougo dates ANYONE that person should be fully vetted by junichiro, geiz, tsukuyomi, and woz because CLEARLY HE CANNOT SAFELY CHOOSE A PARTNER FOR HIMSELF

i still really like yuko as a character, if not as a person. same as i enjoy junji ito manga, but would be very upset if most of it happened in real life.

swartz loves a woman who can kick his ass

what the fuck are manhole covers in this world

i can’t wait for baby tsukuyomi flashbacks! that, and more tsukasa.

[beauregardance]

Song

Post-The Burning Maze. five stages of grief. ao3. 

i.

He’s not dead. He can’t be dead. Not after everything they’ve gone through with Gaea and the giants – he can’t end up dead with a spear embedded in his back and a megalomaniac god-emperor standing over his prone arrow-struck body with a bored expression on his face.

Oh gods.

She vaguely hears Caligula giving orders to kill her, and she thinks that this is it. She draws her knife, ready to go down fighting even if the pandai can shoot faster than she can think. Apollo steps in front of her and suddenly she wants to scream at him where were you for Jason? Then, a cold gust of wind swirls around her, lifting her off her feet and whisking her away from the scene so fast that she can barely breathe.

  He can’t be dead over a pair of shoes. A pair of stupid shoes.

Apollo says that he’s dead. Even Meg doesn’t argue.

Apollo, the god of healing, can’t heal him – won’t heal him.

She never wants to see Apollo again.

  ii.

A wound to the back, just like how Caligula did it.

She feels the rush of adrenaline even before she stabs Medea, the fire coursing through her blood and giving her an extra rush. She’s not sure if it’s all hers, or a part of it is Helios, the Titan of the sun giving her his strength. Her knife hits the mark and she twists it upon entry into its fleshy target. The sorceress makes a sound like a choked off gasp, turning to look at Piper with wide, shocked eyes, reaching out to grab her.

Piper only shoves her dying body away from her. That was for Jason.

Now that she is lying on the ground, blood forming at the side of her lip, the sorceress doesn’t look so powerful. Her eyes are wild, flickering between her and the army that Piper had cleverly gathered before heading into this mission like she knew that she had lost. Piper kneels down beside Medea, staring at her broken body, and wondering how much destruction she could have prevented if she had mustered up the courage to kill her back when they first met in the department store. Turning her over, she yanks the Katoptris out without gusto. The dark red that decorates her blade is the most vibrant colour that Piper has seen all week.

She stares at Medea’s dying body and feels compelled to speak. “One good stab in the back deserves another,” she finds herself saying, lips curled in a sneer. It’s with a vindictive pleasure that leads Piper to kiss her on the cheek, pressing her unaffectionate lips onto Medea’s smooth skin. “I’d tell you to say hello to Jason for me, but he’ll be in Elysium.” She smiles sweetly at the dying sorceress when she delivers the next words. “You…won’t.”

Medea’s eyes blink rapidly, and Piper thinks with satisfaction that she can detect a note of fear before Medea’s lights flicker out.

She lets go out the breath that she doesn’t realize that she’s been holding. It’s the first time Piper has felt such pure exhilarating enjoyment out of someone’s death, and she could get used to this feeling.

  iii.

She keeps thinking about the Physician’s Cure.

It’s been months into her stay in Oklahoma, and she’s getting used to the quietness. The loneliness. Sure, there are occasional monsters knocking on her door, but nothing she can’t handle on her own after all she’s been through.

If only she’d had the Physician’s Cure somehow… If only she’d had something at the time.

She rolls over in her bed, catching sight of her knife on the desk beside her. The Katoptris gleams golden in the dim moonlight. A glimpse of a vision, maybe. She picks it up, tilting it so she can see her own reflection staring back at her. She waits for something to show up: another way to bring Jason back, even months after his death or an image to confirm her own guilt. Her own bloody, inert hands.

But there’s nothing. She holds the knife a little longer before she gives up, placing it down on the desk.

She knows. She’s not stupid. She knows that there are some wounds that can’t be healed, no matter how far she searches.

But the knowledge doesn’t stop her chest from aching, and until she has hit a dead end, she won’t stop looking.

  iv.

She doesn’t know why she breaks when she returns to camp in the summer.

Piper has been okay for the past while, if she said so herself. But now she pauses, drinking in the sight of the rolling green meadows, the dragon curled around the pine tree, the orange figures in the background, and the sound of laughter and shouting in the distance. And suddenly, she feels disorientated, like Medea herself has picked her up and thrown her into a wall.

She exhales and walks through the magical barrier into Camp Half-Blood, and she continues walking onwards to the cabins. People greet her as they pass by, and she nods, her lips pulling politely into an automatic smile. She can’t bring herself to engage with anyone, even when she sees Annabeth. There’s an empty hole gnawing at her that grows bigger with each step that she takes. Is this what she had been nourishing, the whole time in Oklahoma? This vacuum, so sharp in its hollowness that she can feel it crawling up into her throat?

It’s only when she reaches the cabins that she realizes where her feet have been taking her. Cabin One stands alone and aloof in front of her. There are spiderwebs, she notices, on the windows. If she opens the door, she would be enveloped in dust. Thalia has probably come by since the event, and she must have collected all of his belongings. The cabin is most likely empty, devoid of the life it used to contain.

And that’s when she feels everything rising up at once, all the anger, the pain, the sadness, the regret, and she nearly collapses in front of the Cabin, sobbing freely into both palms of her hands.

  v.

She finds him on her way home from school, trudging the same path as she always has for the past school year. The image is astonishingly sharp: a young man dressed in all black, surrounded by the dying shades of the autumn trees. She wishes she could take a photograph to capture the moment, but she’s certain that he wouldn’t like it very much.

“Nico,” she greets when she nears him. “What are you doing here?”

He shrugs, both hands tucked in the pockets of his aviator jacket. “I’m on a quest,” he explains. “I was nearby, and I heard you were here so… I thought I would drop by.”

“Want to stop over at my place to eat?” Piper offers, wondering if he’s questing by himself. It wouldn’t be unusual for him, but it still doesn’t sound very safe.

“I’m good. Will and I just had something to eat. I just wanted to tell you…I saw Jason.”

Piper feels like her heart is going to stop. “What?” she asks, her voice lowering to a hush. Nico nods solemnly.

“We had to get through the Underworld. And that’s when I saw him. He was there – the River Lethe.”

She thinks she knows where this is going, and her throat feels dry. She doesn’t know what to say or what to think. From the look of it, Nico doesn’t look too sure of himself either.

Nico quickly clarifies his statement. “I didn’t see him. When someone decides to cross the river, they give up their form they had in life, so only their essence remains. That’s what I saw. I saw his essence – his soul. I felt his soul. Either way, it was Jason. And when he crossed, he was gone. I thought you deserved to know.” He’s rambling at this point, and Piper is reminded that it’s not just her and Leo that felt the crushing impact of his death. She knows that Nico was good friends with him too, and she can’t imagine what he had gone through when the news reached him.

“So, he’s chosen rebirth,” Piper says aloud, surprised by how startlingly…calm she feels about this. She had imagined that it would devastate her – knowing that he had gone onwards to somewhere she doesn’t know, somewhere that would complete the irreversibility that comes with death. But somewhere along the way, she thinks that she had already accepted that he was gone forever.

She’s silent for a while, feeling the permanence set into her body, and she realizes that she doesn’t feel so different from ten minutes ago. Sure, there’s a gentle nudge in her heart, like somewhere buried deep is the pain waiting for the perfect moment to resurface, but for now, she thinks she’s okay.

“Thank you,” she finally says, “for telling me.” There’s a truth ringing to her words, and she gives Nico a smile that he returns hesitantly.

They bid goodbye after that, and Piper continues the rest of the way home in quiet solitude. When she’s home, she reaches for the Katoptris resting demurely at the bottom of her backpack, wondering if it’s going to show her an image from Jason’s new life.

She flicks it around for a bit, but it remains stubbornly dull, and when Piper puts the knife away, she thinks that maybe after all, she’s okay with that – with not knowing anything about his whereabouts or his new life. After all, isn’t that what rebirth is for?

The dull pain twinges when she thinks about him. But, she thinks, she’s going to be okay.

[warmau]

winner is having a comeback!!! i just saw and so here, have some winner hp!au stuff

 Seungyoon 

gryffindor prefect who wishes he was the head boy but is fine with his job because it's still important,,,,,,,if only the first years weren't the only ones who listened to him,,,, 

plays on the quidditch team, is a beater 

is really good at muggle music because he taught himself to play guitar the manual way (didn't drink a potion or put a spell on the instrument to play itself 

even though seunghoon teased him about for a whole semester)

does ok in all his other classes but has a knack for divination even though he hides it from his classmates who make fun of the subject

you're pretty sure he isn't lying when he reads one of the tea leaves and tells someone they're going to fail their OWLs because the person who he said it to literally sleeps in every class you have with them 

so you go over and ask seungyoon to read yours and he's like "sure,,,,is there something you're interest in knowing specifically?"

and you put your hands up on the desk and shrug like "how about my love life?" 

seungyoon kind of flusters for a second but agrees and as he's looking at the leaf he frowns and is like "there's not much, which means something is going to happen really really soon-" 

and just as he's about to finish seunghoon walks by and is like "i heard you were watching seungyoon games over the weekend, was it fun?" To you 

and you're like hOON SHUT UP but he's just chuckling like a madman before skipping away and seungyoon is like "you came to watch me play?" and you're like m,,,maybe,,,,yes 

and he suddenly gets a bit pink in the face and he's well,,,,if you have time after this i can teach you some tricks on the broom????? and you're like OMG id love that 

and long story short he didn't see anything in the tea leaves because,,,,,after he teaches you some stuff you guys decide you'll have a proper date at diagon alley,,,,,next week hehe 

Jinwoo

hufflepuff whose part of herbology club and likes plants,,,,,,,,and being nice to people,,,,,,,,,,

and is fiercely loyal to his friends because people like to downplay hufflepuff’s as serious, studios wizards but,,,,,,if one of his friends gets hurt jinwoo is the first person to perform healing spells and to put himself on the line to protect those close to him

but he’s all like,,,,,,,,,,the most handsome wizard ever,,,,,,,,,like he’s famous among the entire school and other schools overseas because like Have you Seen his Perfect Face

when his photo got printed in the newspaper for a discovery by the club he was in on a new kind of magical plant, the newspaper literally was sold out. that has never happened????? but everyone wanted his moving image for themselves?????? jinwoo’s impact

you’re his underclassman but you really like herbology just like him and you’ve got a first press copy of “one thousand magical herbs and fungi” and phyllida spore is literally your Idol

and no one has ever really shown interest as passionately as you do, especially with how outspoken you are during club meetings and how you even insist that you guys shouldn’t be scared to go into the dark forest to find more samples of plants

and sometimes your overexcited voice and overflowing knowledge gets on other students nerves, but jinwoo,,,,,,,,really sees you only have good intentions to learn and so if he hears anyone start whispering something mean he mutters a spell under his breath that makes it impossible for them to speak above a certain volume for a bit

and he thinks you don’t notice, he thinks he’s doing a great job at being subtle but you do know

and you,,,,,,,,are really thankful but you’re way too shy to ever approach him and thank him,,,,,,,,,until one day it’s just you two left in the club room

and jinwoo is humming softly, using his wand to put away all the chairs and books and you’re watching the way he’s so gentle when handling a wand and performing magic and it makes you just like him more

and you’re like “,,,,upperclassman if i can say something,,,,,” and jinwoo is like “go ahead!” and you’re like swallowing your fear and you’re like tHANK YOU !!!!!!! FOR PROTECting,,,,,mE,,,,,,,,,i know i can get annoying and talk too much but you always try to hide peoples negative thoughts from me,,,,,,,,,and i-it’s very sweet and im very happy for you,,,,,,,,i really like having you,,,,,,,,,,on my side!!!!!!!

and jinwoo is so shocked that he almost drops his wand and the chair floating mid air almost breaks but he manages to regain his wand and you rush to catch the chair before it comes crashing down

and jinwoo is blushing, bringing up his sleeve to shield his face and he’s like “so,,,,,,you’ve known all along what ive been up to?” and you’re like “Yes,,,,,,,,,,,it’s very nice,,,,,,of you” and he’s like “then if it’s ok, ill keep doing it?” and you’re like !!!!!! please do and then you see him smile as he lowers his sleeve and he’s like “ill always be on your side, does this mean i can count you to be on mine?”

Mino

ravenclaw who looks like he shouldn’t be in ravenclaw,,,,,,,because everyone is prime and proper and mino doesn’t even bother tying his tie correctly or wearing his robe to class

and his broom? it breaks every month. the poor thing is falling apart its been bandaged so many times that seungyoon thinks mino is a flying hazard when he gets on it

surprisingly though,,,,,,he takes studying serious. especially transfiguration.

is actually a metamorphmagus, meaning he was born with the skill to alter his appearance to look like a completely different person. his hair and eye color change along with his emotions,,,,,,,he’s kinda learned how to control but it’s still something that happens

“im not mad seunghoon. i promise.” “mino, your hair turned red and your eyes are swirling into a dark black abyss, i can tell that you’re mad.”

doesn’t talk about it much, but he wants to be an auror,,,,,,,,,because like it’s such a cool job and no matter how messy he might present himself to be or laidback,,,,,he can be really serious and determined

is in a punk band called ‘gremlins and goblins” along with seunghoon. neither of them play instruments they really just scream into mics and fool around LOL

you’ve always been super jealous of mino’s abilities as a metamorphmagus because you have to be born as one to be able to transform like that

and for a while you tried to teach yourself spells that would at least let you change hair color or your nose or something but it’s super hard

and mino’s just,,,,,,,,so good at it because it’s natural and when everyone in class is like “turn into the professor before they get here!!!” and mino does it in like the blink of an eye and everyone is like wOW

and you’re just like,,,,,,,,,,,,,why can’t i make my magic strong enough to do that

and mino’s sweet so he’s always nice to you and you kinda act cold out of your own jealousy and accord

until one day he’s got to sit next to you in class and transfiguration of all,,,,and you’re like grumbling to yourself and the teacher is like “alright, we’re gonna turn a dinner plate into a mushroom!” and you’re like omg this is such an easy spell,,,,,

and you do it in a flash and mino,,,,,,,you see is struggling even though he has the highest scores for this class???? and you’re like “um,,,,,are you ok? are you sick?” and mino chuckles and he’s like “nope, ive just always been bad at this one.” and you’re like ,,,,,,,,,,let me help

and you help him repeat the spell and you’re like leaning over to help re position his wand

and like,,,,,,,wow you’re the one helping mino,,,,,,the top student and he’s smiling at you and thanking you and ok,,,,,,what,,,,,,he’s so cute,,,,,,um,,,,,,,,who,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,allowed?? him??

and after class mino catch up with you and ok seriously he looks so cute with his shirt untucked and his tie loose around his neck and his ravenclaw scarf thrown over his shoulder and he’s like “OWLS are coming up and you’re super smart, we should study together?”

and you’re like “oh,,,,like a study group?” and mino laughs embarrassingly and he’s like “is it bad that im kinda hoping it’s a study DATE instead?”

you: drops your wand lfkjdgsmgg

Seunghoon

slytherin troublemaker and captain/seeker of the houses quidditch team

likes to play pranks on everyone. even the house ghost, the bloody baron

is only passing his classes because he has to to be able to stay captain,,,,,,,,,,pretty sure he has some method of cheating but like,,,,,,who knows,,,,,,,tbh seunghoon is probably the most cunning in that whole house and that’s what the house is known for so can you imagine,,,,,,

tried to smuggle in a dog onto the platform when taking the train to school, but it was confiscated and seunghoon was forced to make due with only his frog,,,,,,,

like mino, he’s part of ‘gremlins and goblins’, and his lyrics are all incoherent noises and sometimes lowkey disses at some of the teachers at school and mino is like bro,,,,,,,,,,,we can’t and seunghoon is like bro,,,,,,,,,no one listens to this “music” but us let me talk shit about the charms professor-”

seunghoon is actually an animagus. and most people are shocked because to become one you need a lot of patience, the process is super long

but he did it, and his form is the same as his patronus,,,,,,a cheetah 

and he shows it off like all the god damn time like WE GET IT you’re an animagus seunghoon sit down before you knock something over with your long limbs or your cheetah tail

and ,,,,,,,, there’s a certain person seunghoon likes to show off the most to,,,,,,,that person is you

and most of the time you just roll your eyes and play off his corny pick up lines and that time he drank a potion to be able to imitate your favorite actor at the time

and like,,,,,,you’ve been friends with him for a while so you really just think it’s all teasing so you don’t take it seriously

not until one day he’s trying to show you a cool trick on his broom, but end ups falling back first onto the hard floor of the hallway and you hear something crack and you’re like seunghoon,,,,,,,SEUNGHOON

and you drop down and move his head into your lap and you’re like turning his head this way and that and you’re like “can you lift your hand???? leg???? listen if you can’t ill levitate you and get you to the-”

and seunghoon suddenly starts chuckling and you’re like ???????

and he’s like “i knew it,,,,,,,,you do actually care about me. so are you free after the match this afternoon, i know we’re gonna win and as a victory gift how about you let me take you on a da-”

and you’re like oh my god did you fall down on PURPOSE and you take out your wand like “im going to seriously poof off your eyebrows for that”

and seunghoon is like nOOO spare my handsome face, which you totally like, pleaaaaaaaase

and you really wanna do it because he messed with you but at the same time you just sigh and you’re like getting up

and seunghoon is like “wait - where are you goi-”

and you’re walking down the hall and with your wand you pick up his broom without looking and use it to thunk him on the head and you’re like

“pick me up after the game. you better win.”  

bonus their patronus’: seungyoon = brown bear, jinwoo = deer, mino = coyote, seunghoon =cheetah 

[idolizerp]

LOADING INFORMATION ON INDIGO’S MAIN DANCE, LEAD VOCAL NAM JAEHWAN...

IDOL DETAILS

STAGENAME: N/A CURRENT AGE: 25 DEBUT AGE: 20 TRAINEE SINCE AGE: 17 COMPANY: MSG SECONDARY SKILL: Acting

IDOL PROFILE

NICKNAME(S): prince, honey eyes INSPIRATION: After singing in church, Jaehwan found out his passion for making people smile with his voice. He became an idol so his voice could reach more people and move their hearts. SPECIAL TALENTS:

Can cry on spot if requested (no sad song needed).

Impersonates the legendary main vocal of gemini.

Knows how to play the piano.

NOTABLE FACTS:

Got a lot of attention in his appearance in the re:group show.

Used to sing in his church’s choir.

Has a dog named Truffles.

Is a really good cook. 

IDOL GOALS

SHORT-TERM GOALS:

as of now, jaehwan is in a bit of an odd situation. his acting career is flourishing, and he’s being taken seriously more and more. he’s not unknown anymore and the push re:group gave him really worked in his favor. he can choose between roles, has offers here and there when before he had nothing. the thing is, he wanted to focus in the group. he wanted to help build them an image while he’s being pushed somewhere else completely by msg while being told this is the best for indigo. jaehwan tries to believe that, and his main goal for now is to keep getting traction for indigo, to help getting the group to even higher levels. even if on his own.

LONG-TERM GOALS:

as his acting career goes, jaehwan wants to push it to the next level. he wants to start acting on cinema, to get even more serious roles. msg seems to be willing to help him on his rise, so he wants to push even further. but he wants to keep a tight link to indigo, his career if so be it. he wants to rise not alone but with them, for indigo to go even higher too; he wants to be known not only for acting nam jaehwan, for that re:group guy nam jaehwan but for indigo’s nam jaehwan.

IDOL IMAGE

at first, he felt like he didn’t have an image.

he felt lost among all of them. jaehwan had learned to sing, he had learned to dance but he never learned how to create an image for himself. so the first year was full of awkward moments, of not knowing exactly where to go. he knew he had things he had to hide. he knew that when the cameras were around he needed to be pristine perfect but that sort of pressure only made him quiet. so he faded to the background, almost unseen. he had fans, sure, but he lacked impact. he lacked something that was his. he sang all right, he did things all right but for a while he wasn’t anyone worth mentioning. he was knwon among fans for being more quiet, more serious. for being careful with members. for being protective with fans. that was it.

until re:group happened.  

whatever happened in that show it was a miracle for jaehwan. first, because he was seen. the producers liked something about him (or maybe msg had payed them, who would know?). he was shown even during times he didn’t even think people would notice what he was doing. helping fellow flop idols, stepping back and allowing someone in a lower ranking to have more lines than him. that wasn’t from the goodness of his heart, truth be told jaehwan just didn’t want to bother. but when it gave him traction he kept it up because it was a good image to play with.

and it stuck. re:group is over (thank god) and he has gone from the nobody lead vocal from indigo to somebody with a name and a fame that catapulted them to something greater. acting came shortly after, an offering that msg didn’t want to let pass. he wasn’t consulted, which pissed him off but they said it was for his and indigo’s good so he did it. it’s been years and he’s still doing it. and even after years the image he has to sustain is still the same: reliable. a leader-like boy who is selfless, much more worried with others than with himself. is an image jaehwan knows how to play quite well because it’s easy, comfortable. he smiles warmly at fans in fanmeetings. he writes encouraging words. he speaks well in events. he shows off this bright, warm image, of someone approachable, someone who looks at things and see the best out of them.

well.

good thing he’s a good actor.

IDOL HISTORY

i. forgive me father, for i have sinned.

jaehwan pauses, listens to the priest speaking with diligent attention. or at least something that looks like it. truth be told deep in his mind jaehwan is thinking of things far more interesting than whatever he’s talking about. something about piety or whatever. he’s thinking about the book he was reading, about the test he has next week. he’s thinking about the girl he took to the back of the school yesterday, about how things get boring quickly. he’s thinking about his phone on his pocket, how it rings and he wants to pick it up and see who’s talking to him. he’s thinking of her, always her.

he bows, prays. he remembers his grandmother used to tell him that if he didn’t pray he’d grow a tail. as a young kid, jaehwan used to kneel and pray for hours and hours, terrified, completely terrified. he has to muffle laughter. his older brother elbows him, a smile on his face, the two of them being shut down by his mother’s gaze.

jaehwan looks back to the priest.

“amen.”

ii. beauty & terror

the younger of two, jaehwan grows up in a wholesome family. his father is the owner of a constructing company, his mother stays home throughout his whole childhood. jaehwan spends christmas with his grandmother, and by the age of eighteen has traveled through more countries than his whole classroom combined. he does well in school (not well enough to be better than some), well in sports (well enough to be better than most) and he does well with people. they like him, for whatever reason. maybe it’s because of the way he smiles. maybe it’s because of the way he looks. the one thing he’s sure is that it’s because they don’t know what he’s thinking.

it’s not about being two-faced, it’s about knowing what he has to conceal. jaehwan wasn’t that young, but also not that old when his temper started to show. an easiness in getting out of hand, a feeling of hot rage that boiled up inside of him at the slight inconvenience.it felt - and it still does - like a paradox. who’d think that such a bright, beautiful boy could go berserk like that, who’d think of such a terrible thing? it made sense, though. it still does. one who keeps so much inside has to let it out somehow. for jaehwan, it always comes out in red, terrible rage.

there’s only two people that jaehwan believes that know him properly. his best friend, sure. but most of all his older brother, junsu. if jaehwan seems like he was made for great things, for glory and gold, junsu is made of it. he’s bright, the smartest in class. the brightness of his days. his brother teaches him how to control himself. he takes him to therapy. he’s the one who takes him to singling classes, the one who tells him he should go to auditions. he’s the one who takes him to msg. he’s the one who helps him to tell his parents that’s what he should do.

junsu is the first person he tells about getting into the company. and the way he smiles. jaehwan will remember that forever. he’s his impulse control, mostly. whenever jaehwan feels too much, whenever he loses control, it’s him he calls. always, always him.

until junsu is gone.

iii. terror

and he goes in the stupidest way possible. a cold that goes south. a stupid doctor that gives him a medicine that he’s allergic to. he can’t believe it. he can’t believe it in the wake, can’t believe it. he spends weeks in a daze, eyes lost, not eating anything. he misses classes, his high school principal calling his mother time after time and jaehwan only listens as she apologizes. at some point he goes back to school. at some point he goes back to training

but there’s something inside that burns and boils and jaehwan meddles with things he shouldn’t. his grades drop, his mood swings get worse. he drops therapy even though his father asks him to continue. whatever monster he had inside that junsu kept leashed was out now, and there’s nothing that worked better for jaehwan than self-destruction.

and guilt.

guilt because there’s this burden that lifts. guilt because part of him, this hideous, awful part of him feels like now he can’t be seen. he has lived up until now under this shadow, this greater than life shadow, and now that the sun has set such a dim star like himself could shine. does jaehwan know that? of course not. that’s not a thought that comes to his head, proper and full. it’s a feeling. it’s a shadow on the wall, when he turns to look at it it’s gone. but it fuels him. it ruins him. it destroys him.

junsu used to keep him sane. he picks up his phone, calls him. once. twice. he calls him and listens to the voicemail. he never picks up.

he had no one to keep him sane.

iv. grief

jaehwan dives into training after a while. he pretends like life goes on, and life actually does. he graduates from high school, the help from friends and so making him get his grades back to passable. so he focuses on training. he sings until his voice gets hoarse, dances and dances until his limbs collapse. he only goes back home late at night, which is good, truly. it’s better to go back that late because then his mother is already asleep, the sleeping pills by her side. his father would be asleep too, though never on his bed. months ago jaehwan would go after him, tell him to go to bed he didn’t need to work so much. now he knows that working sometimes is just a way to ignore life. or death.

so jaehwan keeps training, he keeps practicing. even when he feels like he doesn’t even want that so much he marches on. this was their thing, his and junsu’s. he’s not about to let it die. not with him. no. he’ll keep it alive. keep him alive. he can do it.

when he debuts no one is surprised. it just seems like the sort of thing nam jaehwan does.

v. expectations & reality

he’s not used to this.

because this is not the sort of thing nam jaehwan does. failing. it’s not his thing. so when song after song is met with cold from the public, with disregard, jaehwan doesn’t know what to do. he gathers modest attention, basically nothing. he’s good at singing, okay at it, maybe. he’s good at looking good, at smiling at the camera, of getting some attention for that at least. but it’s never enough. they go on, elaborate choreographies, songs that as soon as he listens to he knows they won’t go anywhere.

there’s a feeling here: that maybe junsu was wrong. he wasn’t made for this. he wasn’t good at this. maybe he should just abandon this sinking ship, go to law school. he’s a bit old, sure, but well. but here’s the thing, that’s also not the sort of thing nam jaehwan does: giving up. that’s not his thing.

but he’s getting desperate.

and desperation was never his best friend. desperation makes him reckless. desperation makes him angry. desperation makes him lash out on his members. desperation makes him lose control when he can’t, not here, not in this place where image is everything. and jaehwan image is crafted, perfect. he’s not the mood maker of the group, he’s not the comic relief. he’s built to look reliable, to look responsible. serious, even. his bluntness and his sense of humor making him look dense in front of cameras - a grandpa, they call him. jaehwan smiles, laughs.

when they tell him about the re:group show he is firm against it. when they tell him that he is one of the guys going he almost flips out. and he does, sort of. but goes anyway. what’s one more humiliation in the huge ass book he already has filled with all the minor varieties, with all the ridiculous shit and concepts. he’ll go to the damn show. make a fool out of himself, what about it. at least it’s not giving up. at least.

vi. beauty

it’s a shock that it works, but jaehwan rides the wave as if he knew it all along.

the attention they get is insane, even more so out of the sudden. but the attention he gets is what surprises him the most. it’s like being seen for the first time. the show cast some light over him, gave him much more screentime than he ever hoped for. something about his looks. something about this one episode where he helped someone out, a favorable edit that showed him as this selfless boy, someone responsible, someone who could be trusted. that he didn’t make it to the final lineup only made him look even better, god knows why.

there’s something good about seeing his group start to rise. finally. fucking finally. but it’s even better knowing he had a role in it.

jaehwan is ready, then. to ride this wave, to work even harder. he practices his vocals more, he tries his hardest to not only be the guy from re:group who was nice and looked nice. he wants to be seen for his talent too.

and that’s when msg casts him in his first drama.

he doesn’t care much for it, but they tell him it’s for the groups’ sake. he does it then. we have to milk that popularity, put your face out there. jaehwan nods. at least it’s better than those stupid variety shows. it’s respectable, in a way, less humiliating. he didn’t expect it to become a side job but it does. shocking enough he’s actually good at it, it’s something he knows how to do. it’s not what he wants to do, sure, but jaehwan guesses this is his curse. he’s doomed to only have the things he doesn’t want, an eternal longing that has its claws in every aspect of his life.

still, he marches on. junsu had told him the meaning of duty. you gotta do what you gotta do. and if you can’t fix it, then you gotta stand it.

jaehwan stands it. he goes on and on and on and the more he keeps in, the more he feels like exploding, a vulcano that’s been asleep for far too long.

you gotta stand it, he remembers, closes his eyes, nails craved in the palm of his hand. he breathes in. he wishes junsu was here, he really does. because he just doesn’t know what to do anymore. because how can he stand it, when the one who he can’t fix is himself?