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marvelwitchergilmore · 1 year

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In Love

Summary: Clint Barton x Fe!Reader ~ Turns out, you’ve been keeping a massive secret from Clint despite being his friend and co-worker for the last six years.

Disclaimer: violence, swearing (I think), pining, life-or-death situations, kiss to keep cover, fluff, hand holding, angst, blood, torture, Clint does not have kids or a wife or has ever, 16+ themes (Criminal Minds kinda thing). MDNI - This is your warning - If you read on, you have agreed to read 16+ themes.

The moment you came home your first day in the field, you knew what was to come.

You never fell in love. Never even fell into ‘like’. But the moment you met him…it was game over. Your future self laughed at your younger self.

“I’m never gonna fall in love.” you would say. “I’m never gonna like a boy like that. I’m not going to want someone to come home to. I want my own space. I don’t want anyone by my side. I don’t need anyone but my dogs. They can keep me company when I’m old and grey.”

God, you wished you could be like that again. Despite knowing none of it would be true, you wished you still had those ideologies. That you would never fall in love. That you would never date or marry or want children and turn out to be a Sports Mom with a minivan filled with gear, orange slices and cases of water you got on sale from Costco.

But the moment you saw him…that ideology died. In fact, it burst into a ball of flames.

You had never had that feeling before. That kind of feeling that sent a tornado through your stomach, blood pumping around your body as if you’d just fought for your life in a cross country race and your heart doing somersaults against your lungs that knocked the air out of them.

But the moment you saw him…you had to scold yourself.

And you scolded yourself over and over and over and over again, for years.

Agent Clint Barton was first and foremost your teammate. You could only trust one another to the extent that the other did. Same with the rest of your team.

Without trust, there would be no foundation for anything.

And he trusted you. That much was clear.

Afterwards, you, Clint and the rest of your team became friends and before long, you were a unit. A family.

Each and every one of you knew the other like the back of your hands, except…Clint felt like he was missing something with you.

He knew you were keeping something from him. And sometimes it felt like the rest of the team were trying to keep your secret, too.

Though, you knew that the rest of the team didn’t know for certain about your feelings towards Clint. They knew you but when it came to your love life, you were the only one none of them could figure out. Your cards were kept firmly against your chest.

One evening, Willa (one of your teammates) spotted you in a small cafe getting a drink with a guy and when she saw you Monday morning, she instantly asked you about him. The whole team was there. Were you about to reveal that you have a secret boyfriend this whole time? Perhaps he was your husband and you had 4 kids and secretly owned a private school in Nebraska?

But, no.

“He was just a guy and we had a good time but I don’t think I’m gonna see him again.”

“Why not?” Clint asked you.

“Because the day after I saw him in the park with his girlfriend and their dog.”

“Ooh,”

“I’m sorry, honey.” Willa frowned.

“It’s okay.”

For the next couple of months, you went on more dates. Some were set up by Willa and Jerry (another teammate) and the rest by online sites. And, some were more successful than others but in the end, none of them gave you that feeling that you had when you first met Clint. That kind of feeling, the moment you dropped your bag and closed your front door had you nodding your head and accepting, “Yep, this is it.” as you realised, somehow, miraculously, you’d managed to have a loving crush on someone. But it wouldn’t matter, because he is your teammate.

And, after two years of trying to get rid of your feelings for him, or at least, trying to accept them and move on with your life, Clint sent your heart spirally and fell even harder when yourself, Willa, Jerry, Una and Clint were all sent on a mission together.

It was an extraction.

The host of the gala was a multi-millionaire and would be auctioning off his prized possessions in a secret auction. The gala was simply a front. After all, why would more than three dozen highly wealthy people all come to the same country for “a holiday”.

His prized possessions included a hard-drive that opened the buyer to a world of information surrounding offshore accounts that were used to help free-lance agents that still had ties to any and all government organisations.

Shield included.

Only, after the initial smooth sailing, things took a turn.

“It’s not here.”

From the other side of the bar, your eyes met with Clint’s and you spoke into your drink as you lifted it to your lips. “What do you mean it’s not there?”

“I mean it’s not here.” Jerry told you down comms. “The harddrive. It’s not in this room.”

“Then where could it- oh no.”

“Oh no? What oh no?” Clint asked.

Willa turned her back to the column. “It’s in his jacket.”

“What do you mean it’s in his jacket?”

“Ten O’clock.”

Low and behold, there the host stood, the silver USB stick in his hand, smiling as he waved it around three other potential buyers.

One of them went to touch it and the host pocketed it before he could, smiling before removing his jacket and handing it to his butler beside him who folded it up and began to walk away with it.

“Where’s he taking it?”

Willa lip-read what she could from the conversation.

“His bedroom.”

“His bedroom is heavily guarded.”

“You don’t say.”

“Guys, what are we going to do? We need that hard drive.” Jerry’s voice rang through.

“Someone needs to get his attention.” Willa replied.

“How?” you asked.

“I have an idea.”

Moments later, Clint was by your side.

“What are you-”

“Just trust me. You can punch me later.”

You placed your hand in Clint’s as he led you to the dance floor and suddenly you were very aware of your own skin. It was an odd feeling.

“Just do what I do. But backwards. And in heels.”

“Thanks, Fred. What exactly is your plan here?”

Clint’s eyes met yours. “He looks in your direction every 45 seconds. I’m going to give him an excuse to make his move.”

You yelped in shock as Clint pulled you flush against him, his hand flexing on your lower back.

“Just trust me?”

You caught the sincere look in his eyes and all you could do was nod.

It worked.

Just as Clint was moving you around the dance floor, your mind going elsewhere, there came a tap onto Clint’s shoulder.

“May I cut in?”

“Of course.”

Clint pressed a kiss to your cheek, quickly whispering in your ear. “Flirt. You look beautiful, by the way.”

You smiled and nodded as he walked away, letting your hands slip from his and into the host’s. And, after flirting for the length of a song, feeling his hands go lower down your back, your own hands stopping him, he finally walked you up the stairs and towards his bedroom.

“Don’t worry, I’ve got eyes on you.” Clint spoke down comms.

You looked over your shoulder as you climbed the grand staircase with the host’s hand at your back, and you saw Clint to the left of the dance floor, watching you carefully.

Once you found yourself with the host, alone, in his bedroom and the guards told to clear away and take their break for an hour or so, you made quick work in knocking him out, finding the jacket and removing the hard drive.

Only, once you left and met Clint outside the bedroom door, a new to duty guard came around the corner.

“Just follow me.” Clint took your hand in his as he pocketed the hard drive into his jacket.

You only got half-way walking down the hall when the guard, who had peaked in on the host, came back out and shouted for you both to stop.

Of course, you didn’t.

You both ran instead.

Then an alarm was pulled and every guard the host paid seemed to be after you and Clint.

“What are you going to do?” Willa asked as Clint pressed something into her hand as he ran past her and out of the door.

“We’ll meet you back at the safe house.” Clint told Willa. “Just take the hard drive and get it to Jerry. Una, tell me you’ve got the van ready.”

“Ready. I’ll meet Willa and Jerry at the extraction point.”

“Good.”

And for the next ten minutes, you and Clint were running through the streets and back alleyways of the town, running in separate directions for a while before bumping into each other down a side-ally.

Footsteps were coming closer and the sound of bullets were flying through the air.

“They don’t know what they’re aiming at.”

“But they’ll find us soon.”

“If we run out now, they’ll shoot at us.”

“So what do we do?”

“I don’t know.” you looked at him, breathless, before looking back down the alley.

Then it hit Clint.

“I have an idea but I need you to trust me. Like, really trust me.”

“Jesus Christ, Barton. Just get on with it.” you finally called out as he tried to prevent the inevitability of his plan - despite you not knowing what it was.

The footsteps were drawing closer and for a moment they stopped, a light flashed down the alleyway and voice talked before the running continued.

But none of that registered in the moment because your brain was short-circuiting since Clint’s bright idea was to kiss you.

His hands came to your face and he could feel your hands on his arms, ready to push him off and probably punch him. But you didn’t. And, rather than the kiss being stiff and awkward…it was unlike any other.

One of his hands still remained by the side of your face when the light shone down the path but his other came down your body, sending goosebumps in their wake, before he pulled you against him and he stepped closer pressing you between him and the wall.

Your own hands travelled up to his neck and pulled him closer but once the footsteps died away, the kiss slowly came to an end leaving you both breathless against one another.

“I think it worked.”

Clint nodded, swallowing hard, as he looked at you.

How had he never noticed the reflection of the stars in your eyes before?

“I think it did. Are you gonna punch me now?”

Clint watched as you paused for a moment.

“Not right now. But if they come back, I might.”

“We better go?”

You nodded. “We better go.”

You had to push yourself along because you knew, if you didn’t, you’d kiss him again and he’d simply kissed you to avoid getting caught, right? There would be no dire consequences after that kiss.

But all Clint could do was scold himself as you both made your way back to the safe house. How had he never noticed the stars in your eyes before? Or how, in the morning, the rays of the sun shone back just as bright? He also scolded himself from allowing himself to emotionally indulge in the kiss he shared with you. You are his teammate. And he knew himself.

He couldn’t let his heart get involved, or else there would be dire consequences.

Initially, things felt…awkward. But, after four years, it was just an old memory, right? And, yeah, sure, the memory would be revisited from time to time whether independently or shared…kinda. Mostly, this was when the team would have drinks one night and would be talking about love lives and first kisses and worst kisses.

“Alright, alright, alright. I’ll give you that one.” Una said, swirling her bottle of beer. “But kissing to avoid something, that can't work, can it?”

“It can.”

Your mouth spoke the words before your brain could stop you.

“And how would you know?”

You caught Clint’s smirk as he looked down to his beer.

“I just do.”

“Oh, really?”

“Come on, tell us!” Willa cried.

You shook your head with a suppressed laugh. “I’ve said too much.”

“No, come on!”

“Maybe some other time.”

“No fair.”

“Okay,” you smiled. “You tell us about what happened with Derek and your ‘worldly knowledge’ and I’ll tell you my story.”

Willa narrowed her eyes at you, playfully. “You play a clever game.”

You just sat back and smiled.

But despite all of this, four years on, neither you or Clint had seemingly changed. But he still felt like you were hiding something from him.

Except, he’d find out soon enough. And not in a way either of you hoped he would.

This time, you’d been called in on your day off.

“What’s going on?”

Clint turned around from the monitor and was at first taken aback from your clothing. Usually, you wore black pants and a black t-shirt to work or a work shirt or, if the situation called for it, sand coloured cargo trousers and a breathable t-shirt. Though, that was usually when having to attend a military base outside of cooler weather.

Instead, you wore a cosy jumper and dungarees that had paint splatter all over them, including your white pumps and small freckles of pain on the baby hairs that had escaped their cover of the hair bandanna.

Clint also spotted the remnants of nail polish in your cuticles and light paint on the side of your hands.

“We’ve just got- have you been decorating?”

You looked over yourself. “Oh, yeah. Felt like a change. Anyway, what’s going on?”

“We’ve just got wind of a hostage situation. We can’t make verbal contact with the abductor but they did send this out.”

It was a note.

And it was through that note that led you and Clint making an extraction which was initially successful until you did a final sweep afterwards only to be knocked out when you spotted a door had been left ajar and the lights turned off.

Clint, after not hearing your reply, came in after you.

And that was how you both ended up waking up inside some beat down old home that had probably been designed in the 40s.

His voice was hazy, but you heard Clint call your name. You also tried your best to take in a breath but was only met with a damp stench and the feeling of your lungs crushing you into shock.

“Take it easy, he hit you pretty hard.”

After a few minutes, you finally gained some normality in your lungs but the sting was still there.

“What happened?”

“After he went all sleeper agent on you, I came in and found you unconscious. I was trying to wake you when he stuck something in my neck.”

“I see you got the peaceful option.”

“Funny.”

“Where the hell are we?” you asked, trying your best to look around.

“I don’t know. I haven’t heard any cars so I’m gonna take a guess and say we’re in the middle of nowhere.”

“Well, that narrows it down.”

“Did you see who took us?”

“No.”

“Would you like to?”

You and Clint snapped your heads to the open space in front of you both.

Out from the shadows appeared the guy who you had seen just before his gun came across your head and your body hit the ground.

The man walked from one side of the room, to the other, screwing in the light-bulbs beneath the lampshades causing both you and Clint to squint at the brightness. You’d both been submerged in darkness for quite some time.

“My name is Jack. I know, how original. It was actually my mother’s father’s name. Named after my grandfather, grand ol’ Jack. Lived till he was 92. Always said the best way to survive was to always tell the truth. That lies weighed on the soul. And to have a small shot of whiskey before going to bed. Said that was good for the heart since it quietened the mind.”

“Really touching story,” you cut him off. “But why are we here?”

“Don’t you get it?”

You and Clint looked at one another. Had you both missed a part of this conversation?

“I tried to save those people in the warehouse.” Jack told both of you as he straddled a chair. “People in this world need saving from themselves. People are dying younger than they ever did. And it’s because of all the lies. The lies they keep from their parents, and their children and themselves. It’s all crushing their soul. And I knew…” Jack smiled, wagging his finger. “I knew the moment I saw you down there that yours was being crushed the most.”

“Saw me?”

Jack stood from his chair. “I was in the corner office, on the top floor. It has an excellent view. Whoever has that office next will love it. The accents on the wall, ah magnificent.” Jack kissed his fingers before continuing. “But it gave me a good scope. I understand not everyone will…agree with my methods, per say.”

“No, because you took people hostage.” Clint pointed out.

“I was trying to save them! And I was finally getting through to them until those SWAT guys pulled out my team.”

“Again, because you had taken them hostage. And now you’ve taken us hostage.”

“This world needs saving!” Jack yelled. “It needs saving from the lies people tell and the secrets they all hide.”

“Alright!” you yelled out before calming your voice. “Alright. So…the world needs saving? Jack, do you really think you’re saving it…by killing people? The hold-up down on 9th? That was you, right? Those people you let go-”

“They let their souls free. They told the truth.”

“So, if we-” you looked at Clint before turning back to Jack. “If we tell you the truth, will you let us go?”

“Yes.”

For a moment, the feeling in the room got lighter. Maybe there was a way out after all.

“But you’ll only lie. No, you…your secrets are too big to just give up freely. You…you’re a take em’ to the grave kinda gal. So, no. I won’t let you go. Not until I know that it’s the truth.”

“How will you know?”

Clint regretted asking the question.

“Because she’ll be begging to tell me. You both will.”

Neither of you knew how much time had passed but the spots from the light were getting duller and bigger.

“No, no. You can not sleep yet. You haven’t freed your soul.”

“Why do we have to free our souls?” you asked, the taste of blood coming to your mouth. “What if I don’t want to be saved? You said it yourself. I’d rather take mine to the grave.”

“Oh, but you don’t. Not really.”

Jack had been circling you and Clint for a while, as if he were a hunter, teasing you - waiting for you to beg to be killed.

“No, I can see it in your eyes. The eyes never lie.”

Jack levelled himself though he wasn’t close enough to knock out. His hands gripped your thighs as he hummed, annoyance clear in his expression as he tried to figure out your secret.

“Perhaps you killed someone? No, that isn’t it. Maybe you ran away? Have a secret family? No, that’s not it either. The eyes never lie to me. What is it? What are you not telling me? What are you not telling yourself?”

Clint called your name and Jack saw the slightest change in you. So slight, in fact, even you didn’t feel it.

“It’s him. It had something to do with your team. No, teammate. It’s him and just him.”

Jack pushed against your thighs so he could stand up straight. Quickly, he made his way over to Clint and circled him.

“What is it? What is it about you, huh? What has her secret got to do with you? Let's see if we can find out.”

You heard the snap of a switchblade as it opened and the fight for Jack to steady Clint but before he could make the first cut or slice, you cried out.

“Stop! He doesn’t know! He- he doesn’t know. Please…just…just don’t hurt him. Please.”

Jack looked over to you and Clint’s name escaped your lips, both in pleading and question.

“Oh…oh, this runs so much deeper than just a secret.”

You lowered your head for a moment. The pounding in your heart was only made harder by your own silent cries telling you to not say anything else. But there was a chance you’d both die, so why not tell him? Right? Maybe it would save your lives? Or would it only give Jack more ammunition to use?

“Doesn’t it?”

“Please…don’t.”

Jack knelt in front of you and gently touched your cheek before moving his hand down and grasping under your jaw, forcing your head up.

“Tell me. Let me free your soul.”

Tears rolled down your cheeks, your heart crushing your lungs inside your chest.

“If you don’t tell me, I will only hurt him more. And you don’t want to hurt him. Tell me. Help me save both of you. Tell me. No, tell him.”

Jack moved your head, forcing you to look at Clint with tear stained cheeks.

“I’m sorry, Clint. I’m so sorry.”

Your name came from Clint’s voice, barely above a whisper.

“You can admit it,” Jack said your name. “You committed the most heinous act an agent such as yourself can do, didn’t you? You created a danger, not only for him, but yourself.”

Clint said your name again, trying to move his hands only to find them still shackled to his chair.

“You fell in love.”

You took in a breath, the beating feeling in your chest, turning into a stabbing feeling against your lungs. Your head remained down as you squoze your eyes shut, more tears escaping from your lids, down your lashes and onto your lap.

“Please…”

You didn’t even know if Jack could hear you, but you pleaded with him anyway.

“We need to hear you say it.”

You remained silent but then-

“Say it!”

Jack’s hand came to your face and pushed you to look at him.

“Say it! Say it!”

You continued to plead with him until he pushed you back further and you screamed out.

“I fell in love! I fell in love! Please! Stop! No! Please! I-I fell in love! I fell in love with him! Please! I-I fell in love with him. I’m in love with him!”

Jack stopped and waited a moment before pulling you back so all four legs of the chair were on the ground and he finally removed his hand from your face.

“And there it is.”

He was smiling. The look and sound of fear in your body had pushed him further but the defeated look on your face…that couldn’t be bought. That had to be created, by his hands.

Clint looked between Jack and you and he didn’t know what to be more worried about. What Jack could possibly do to you next, or the fact that even he knew you were telling the truth to Jack.

You were in love with him.

But he didn’t have long to sit and think about it because flashing lights suddenly came from behind the thick fabric that covered the broken windows, blocking out the light of the day and night.

“No! No!” Jack shouted. “I still need to save them!”

It all happened so quickly, Clint barely caught the fact that Willa had rushed inside, Una arresting Jack and detaining him. Willa rushed over to Clint as Jerry came over to you.

“How did you find us?” Clint asked Willa as Jerry came behind you and picked the locks of your handcuffs.

“Are you okay?”

Jerry knew it was a stupid question, even when you didn’t answer him.

“A dog walker called it in. Said they could hear someone yelling as if they were in pain. He also knew no one has lived in this house since 1982.”

As Willa picked Clint’s handcuffs, Jerry had managed to get you out of yours and without looking back, you darted for the door.

“Wait, wait,” Una called after you. “We need to wait for the medics.”

“Can you take me to the hospital?”

Una looked you over. She could see the clear look in your eyes. You didn’t want to stay here for another second.

“Don’t you want to wait for Clin-”

“Now?”

Una nodded, radioing into Willa who was standing behind Clint, letting Jerry finish unpicking the locks.

“Sure, I’ll call ahead.”

“Thank you, Willa.”

Hoping into the passenger seat, you shut the door as Una climbed into the driver’s seat and took off down the road and to the local hospital.

“What happened in there?” Una asked you as she flicked her eyes from the road to you and back again.

“I don’t wanna talk about it.”

Even with your hand shaking, you pushed your fingers across your face to try and wipe away the tears.

By the time you arrived at the hospital, you were taken to a separate room where Una stayed in the waiting room, filling out your forms. Your hands were too shaky to even hold a pen and you could just about remember your own name.

The doctor ran multiple tests and pushed the small cuts together with closure slips.

“You’re all good but I’d like you to remain here for a couple hours, just in case there’s any change.”

You nodded and quietly thanked the doctor as she left.

There were patches of dirt on your hands, as well as blood and old tears where they washed away the stains.

After an hour, Una came in only to leave a few minutes later since she was called back to base to interrogate Jack. And, as she left, you slowly lowered yourself down on the hospital bed and, despite the noise in your head, you fell asleep.

A few hours later, a nurse came in and woke up.

“You can go home now, honey. We’re gonna need this bed.”

“Oh, I’m sorry.” you tried to get up quickly but the nurse only laid a hand on your shoulder.

“It’s okay, honey. Take your time. I read your chart, you took quite the hit. Your friend is waiting for you in the waiting room to take you home.”

You nodded, swinging your legs over the side.

“Here. Take these for the headache.”

“Thank you.”

“No worries, honey.”

By the time you had grabbed your jacket and started walking down the hallway, you stalled when you saw who the nurse was talking about.

If you had the energy, you probably would have run in the opposite direction. But you didn’t. You were tired and if the nurse hadn’t woken you, you probably would have slept for the next 24 hours.

“Una was gonna come but I fought her for it.” Clint tried to smile but he could see your’s was just forced.

“Look, what happened-”

“Clint, please…I– I don’t want to talk about it. I just want to go home.”

“Okay.”

The drive back was silent and awkward and by the time he pulled up, you looked at him for as long as you could stomach (which wasn’t long) before opening up the door and thanking him.

And, the moment you pushed your key inside your door, you thought you were safe. That everything was finished for the day and you could deal with it tomorrow.

But Clint got out of the car and called your name.

“Wait!”

He took the porch steps two at a time and when he finally reached you, you forced yourself to look at him.

“I need to say something.”

“You don’t have to say anything, Clint.”

“But I want to.”

“Please…I’d…I just want to forget what happened today. Please…I can’t do it again.”

“I know you’re scared and watching what he was doing to you…I was scared, too. I am. I am scared.”

“Clint,” you could see the look in his eyes and you shook your head. “No. Don’t. Don’t say anything you’re gonna regret.”

“The only thing I regret is not telling you earlier.” Clint told you. “Then maybe none of this would have happened.”

“Clint-”

“I-”

“Please.”

Your hand flew to his chest and he stopped talking. “Please. Whatever you’re about to say…please wait. Wait for the right time.”

Finally, you looked at him and his hands came to the top of your arms, stroking downwards before holding you close.

“Please…just wait.”

“Okay.”

That was all he said before kissing your head and saying it again.

“Okay. I’ll wait.”

By the time you woke up in the morning, your mind had stilled and before it could get loud again, you started painting again. All of your furniture was covered and two out of the 6 walls you had planned to paint had been cleaned, stripped, sanded, coated and painted.

And, just as you started on the third, a knock came to your door.

“I just want to help.” Clint told you. “And, let’s be honest, last time you tried decorating this place on your own, you nearly knocked yourself out with paint cleaner.”

You, for the first time in the last 48 hours, smiled.

“You can take the kitchen. There should be some new cupboards to keep you company.”

“You’re finally changing them?” Clint asked, entering the kitchen, his tool belt around his hips.

“I am. Picked them out last week.”

“Thank god.” he said. “I hated the last ones.”

“Same.”

The rest of the day ran smoothly enough, despite what the last couple of days had revealed. Clint informed you that you and him both had the next two weeks off before either of you could go back into the field. He also helped fix the kitchen cabinets to the wall as well as install your new oven. You could have done it on your own, but having someone else there made it easier. Clint also helped you move around the heavier furniture and, when fixing the wiring to the lightbulb, he held the ladder steady under you so you wouldn’t fall.

And for the following two days, neither of you mentioned anything about what happened with Jack. It was like nothing had ever happened in the first place.

Until Clint decided he couldn’t wait anymore.

It was easier, before the kiss, to shut off his feelings for you; that worry, that concern, that joy that exceeded more than just the smile of friendship. But after, they became much more clear. He saw the stars in your eyes and the light in your smile. He was more than just amazed at your talents of being an agent. Of course, those who joined Shield all had similar talents, but there was just something more about you. More to be figured out, more to learn, more to be desired and most of all, more to be loved.

He couldn’t wait any longer.

Sure, he’d been called stubborn before but now he was impatient. He’d let time slip by for six years and in that time there had been moments where he wanted to call out from the top of buildings that his feelings for you were more than that of a friend, of a teammate. But he couldn’t.

There was always a mission or a job to be done or a date that got in the way. And now, there had been a raging lunatic that, if Willa and the rest of the team hadn’t landed when they did, could have killed you. He’d set your soul free, you’d been able to tell your secret. What was to stop him from not letting the rest of you go? What was stopping him from shooting you where you sat or using your life against his?

Nothing.

Because Clint couldn’t free himself. He couldn’t free himself from his chair or the shackles that kept him there. No matter how many times he called out your name or shouted for Jack to stop, he couldn’t free himself. He couldn’t get there. He couldn’t stop Jack from doing whatever he wanted to the women he fell in love with all those years ago.

But he could do something now.

So, as you stood beside him in the kitchen measuring out a plank of wood to fit on the wall above your stove, Clint looked at you and finally told you what he’d been wanting to tell you for years and what he was about to tell you two days ago before you begged him to wait, you not fully knowing whether he was going to reject you or tell you that he loved you.

“I’m in love with you.”

Whatever you had been saying about the plank of wood and how you needed to get some more sandpaper from Home Depot quickly came to a stop as you stumbled over your words and looked at him.

“What?”

“I’m in love with you.” Clint repeated.

“No, Clint. Don’t-”

“I’m not just saying it because of what happened.” Clint assured you. “I should have told you years ago but I kept making excuses. But, after what happened, I don’t want to be able to find an excuse. I nearly lost you because I didn’t tell you sooner. I’m not losing you again. I’m in love with you.”

You were stunned to say the least.

“I know, two days ago, you told me to wait. I was going to tell you when I got to the hospital but they told me you’d just fallen asleep. And then you told me to wait when I dropped you off and maybe I should, but I don’t want to. I don’t want to miss a chance to tell you again.”

Again, you were stunned into silence.

“I’m in love with you.”

“I’m dizzy.”

That was all you could say. All the information and realisation of every action made in the last six years all hit you at once.

Swiftly, Clint pulled out one of the bar stools and you sat down holding your head.

“You’re in love with me?”

“I’m in love with you.” Clint repeated.

“You’re in love…with me? Me? The woman sat in front of you? Me?”

“Yes. I am in love with you.”

“Have you inhaled paint cleaner?”

Clint chuckled and pulled out a chair himself, sitting with his knees locked into yours before he took your hands in his.

He stated your full name, “I am in love with you. And have been for the last six years.” Clint also stated your birthdate, star sign, address and badge number. “Does that clear it up?”

Your heart was beating in your chest so fast you thought it might actually explode.

“Clint, I…I need to know you’re not just saying this because of what happened.”

Clint gave a small nod. “I have an idea but I’m gonna need you to trust me. Like, really trust me.”

You nodded and a moment later, Clint’s hands had moved from yours to your face, cupping your cheeks before pulling you in for a kiss.

It was gentle and loving and unlike any other kiss you had experienced before. Other guys had taken what they wanted, forced the kind of kiss they wanted out of you. But not Clint.

Somehow, he conveyed every emotion he could into the kiss and you couldn’t help but feel your mind wander back to your first kiss, down the side alleyway. That felt real. You had to convince yourself it was fake but this, and that, was real.

It was all real.

For a moment, you felt Clint smile into the kiss as your hands gripped at the collar of his checked shirt to pull him closer. A smile which you returned.

“I’m in love with you.”

“I’m in love with you, too.”

Clint smiled and kissed you again, and again, and again.

Despite everything that had happened, and everything that you had previously thought, you had come to realise that maybe it wasn’t so bad to learn to love and accept love in return. And in the years that passed, despite the dangers the job put you both in, it was nice to come home and be greeted with a familiar face and a warm embrace and to have a family you could both call your own.

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