#just. very overwhelmed and anxious about a lot of life things and the future and. yeah.

[queer-reader-07]

sometimes all you need is a cathartic cry before bed to reset your place in the universe

[jesuistrestriste]

♡ Cooking & Cleaning; Art Donaldson x Reader ♡

nsfw! (18+) cw: service sub!art donaldson, dom!reader, afab/fem reader, use of ma'am as an honorific, brief food play, oral sex (reader receiving), begging, handjob, brief edging, praise, degradation, multiple orgasms (character receiving), dry orgasm

wc: 6.3 k (whoops)

note: this was pulled from the most depraved parts of my brain. i refuse to be held accountable for the absolute filth this contains ! :)

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆. ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆. ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆.

The very second that your key is in the apartment door and you're finally home, you find your legs nearly collapsing underneath you as you step inside and kick off your black kitten heels.

"God," you groan, shutting the door behind you before you move to peel your chic new blazer off of your shoulders. You toss it onto the coatrack nearby and bring a handful of your fingers up to your forehead to rub at it tensely, sighing deeply.

It had been a long day at the USTA (United States Tennis Association) office, and all you wanted to do was come home and see your husband.

-

After Art had lost several important and consecutive tennis matches, as well as his confidence on the court (despite his actual tennis skills still being phenomenal -- he just psyched himself out too much), he had decided to give up his life as a professional athlete.

At first, this devastated you. Not only did you love your partner and believe in him throughout his career, as well as believing in his very real ability to eventually win the US Open, but this decision of his also meant that your position as his coach would become obsolete..

You actually became quite anxious about you and Art's future at the time.. you had needed a purpose, and so did he. You both were just those kinds of people; you and him both wanted to feel that you were contributing to something bigger than just yourselves, and that you were being useful to someone or something.

Luckily, his many previous years of successful tennis playing had scored you and him a shit ton of wealth. Like, genuinely a lot. You were beyond grateful, but you still wanted a life of your own. You didn't dare to think about the idea of becoming a stay-at-home wife while he went out and did whatever he wanted. Yuck. It just wasn't for you.

Your fears and inner turmoil about this change in your lives were quickly eased once Art had sat you down about two weeks after he had left his tennis career behind. He had taken your hands in his, smiled softly like he always did, and told you that he wanted to stay at home and take care of everything in it while you went out and continued your career in the field of professional athletics.

Of course, you immediately and excitedly agreed with the idea of this new plan, and then that was that!

You two developed new lives and new roles as people over a short period of time, but it didn't take away from the love you two shared. That always stayed consistent and at the center of everything.

Eventually, after a month or so of coming home from your new job to Art doing things like vacuuming the wooden floors of your guys' expensive New York apartment, or making elaborate protein-packed smoothies for the gym sessions that you two still did together, you came to realize that the whole "house husband" persona was actually kinda hot.

He had realized it too. Quicker than you had, actually. In fact, he can distinctly remember the overwhelming feeling of heat that had pooled deep in his gut the first time he had ever served you a home-cooked meal after you came home from a long day at your new job. He had gently rubbed your sore feet that night while you ate, and then suddenly couldn't find a way to deny how this new practice of.. servicing you.. made him feel.

I mean, God, he loved doing that stuff for you.. cooking.. tidying.. pampering.. washing.. he would do it all. You knew that he worshipped the ground that you walked on—reminding yourself constantly of the time he had admitted to you during sex that he believed he would be "nowhere without you"—and you devoured the increased sense of power that came with it every. single. time. It eventually became very easy and comfortable for you to let him take care of you. You grew hungry for it.

And then this persona of his, over time, dissolved into something much more intimate..

-

After tossing your blazer on the rack and rubbing at your temples, you drag your pantyhose-covered feet across the floor and into the kitchen.

Your nose is instantly filled with the aroma of fluffy, vanilla sweetness and a bit of nutmeg. you sigh happily as you turn the corner and see Art standing over a mess of what appears to be flour and sugar in a large bowl on the kitchen counter. He looks over his shoulder briefly with a smile as he mixes the dry ingredients together with a whisk.

“Hey, hon,” he grins, before turning back to look down at his current baking project.

you shuffle up behind him and hug him, your cheek pressing against his warm upper back as your arms reach to wrap gently around his abdomen. You sigh deeply.

“Hey, babe.. ‘m so tired. It was such a long day.”

He laughs softly, which shakes you a bit as you hold him.

“What’d your colleagues do now?”

You shake your head against him, groaning dramatically.

“I don’t want to talk about it.. what are you baking? It smells good in here.”

“Nothing crazy, it’s just some holiday cookies. I found the recipe online this morning after you left.”

“How many are you planning to make? There’s already some in the oven.” you ask, peeking around his frame from behind to see him set the bowl aside and wipe his hands on the apron he’s wearing. (It was white with small pink hearts by the pockets. You got it for him when he started cooking for you everyday, and he used to feel weird about it. He said it made him feel “slightly emasculated”, but he quickly grew to absolutely adore it. It was just another way for you to claim him as your personal chef. One night before you got home, he jerked off while wearing it, but he would never tell you that.)

“I don’t really know,” he shrugs and chuckles sheepishly, “there are twelve baking right now, but I thought that maybe I could make some for our neighbors.”

You chuckle softly, your hands disconnecting from their place on his stomach to reach down and give his ass a small squeeze. He jumps a little at the feeling, embarrassed laughter bubbling up in his chest.

“Where’d all this holiday cheer come from?” you smirk, pulling back from your position against his back to lean your hip against the counter. You just wanted to look at his pretty face. Your eyes quickly fixate on the fact that he’s got a bit of flour on his flushed cheek.. It’s only a small puff and smear of the white substance near his jaw, but for some reason it starts a flame in your lower stomach. There was just something about the way he got a little messy when he cooked or baked for you.

His cheeks plump up in shape ever-so-slightly as he grins at you.

“I don’t know.. I had time before you got home- I mean, well, before i thought you’d get home, and so i thought I’d just-”

You take a step forward, nodding at his words while your body is now only inches from his. You look up into his glassy blue eyes.

“You thought you’d just.. what?” you purr, your hand coming up to caress his lower back.

He swallows thickly, briefly looking down at the mess on the counter before he looks back to you. His body temperature is steadily rising as he feels your fingertips caress him over his loose t-shirt.

“I just thought I’d make some more,” he whispers.

You lean in, reaching your other hand up to gingerly hold the side of his neck while you press a kiss to it.

“You’re such a sweetheart, aren’t you?”

He nods, slowly, his eyelids fluttering slightly at the feeling of your mouth on him.

“I..I mean, yeah, I guess.”

You lean in a bit more, sucking softly at his neck. His head lolls a bit forward, and you nip at him when the sound of his shaky breathing reaches your ears.

You pull back, a small smirk covering your face as you look up at him.

His focus darts from your eyes to your lips as he reaches both of his hands out for your waist, but he’s rudely interrupted when the timer for the oven goes off— cookies are done.

You both nearly jump out of your skin at the sound; the incessant beeping pulling you both out of the thick fog of tension between your bodies and minds.

“Shit,” he mumbles, flushing pink from his cheeks to the tips of his ears as he turns off the timer at the top of the oven and moves to hastily grab an oven mitt from the lower drawer.

He pulls open the oven door, and you step back to watch him pull the tray out and set it on top of the stove area.

He sighs, pulling off the mitt and setting it aside as he leans over the cookies. His eyes are inspecting each one, and he has a very focused expression plastered on his face. He was as much of a perfectionist in the kitchen as he used to be on the court, that was for sure.

Your body moves in to stand beside him, also peering down at the tray of gorgeous golden-brown cookies. You place a hand on his upper back, rubbing it encouragingly.

“These look incredible,” you say, smiling at him.

He nods, still inspecting them, “They look better than I thought they would.. I actually messed up earlier and accidentally added three-fourths of a cup of sugar instead of two-thirds..”

“They look perfect, don’t stress.”

He looks to you, his gaze meeting yours and then suddenly everything was back to how it was before the timer went off. His hands reach for your waist, squeezing at your hips as he looks lovingly down at you.

“Be proud of yourself, Art.. you did a good job,” you laugh softly, your hands reaching up to cup his face. He pulls you closer.

“I am.”

“Are you?”

“Mhm.”

“Good.”

You suddenly get a very filthy idea.

“Can.. can you tell me what the recipe called for?”

His brows furrow slightly as he seems taken aback by your request, his cock already starting to stir to life in his sweatpants just from holding your body. He didn’t want to talk about the damn cookies anymore.

“What?”

You roll your eyes, one of your hands dropping from his face to reach around the fabric of the front of his apron and grope him over his sweats. Your other hand moves down too, but just to gently hold the side of his torso. His whole body jolts forward and his lips part instantly.

“You’ll like where this is headed, trust me. Just talk to me.. tell me what you did to make the cookies look so perfect..”

He breathes unsteadily, his fingers digging into your waist as he feels your hand start to work his cock up to a full-blown, hot, twitchy erection.

“I.. uhm.. I just..” he breathes out, his eyes growing lidded as he absentmindedly bucks up against your touch, still trying to maintain eye contact as pleasure starts to flood his senses, “one cup of b-butter.. ngh-!.. two cups.. two cups of flour… and then- ugh!- two.. two-thir-r-ds.. of..”

His voice trails off, shaky and low and broken as he hangs his head a bit, leaking incessantly into his boxers. It was that easy for you to work him up.

You frown, “Uh oh.. come on, baby, don’t go nonverbal on me that quick.. we’ve just barely gotten started…”

A small whimper leaves his chest as he tries to finish his words, “Two-thirds, I m-mean- three-f-fourths of a c-cup of.. s-su.. sugar… one teasp’of vanilla.. and.. o-one.. teaspoon of nutm-eg.”

You smile, stroking his cock over the fabric of his pants, “Good boy.. God, you’re so pretty when you’re slurring for me..”

He moans obscenely, melting at the praise while he feels his length grow suddenly intensely hot. A certain kind of numbness starts to creep over his crotch before his hands are flying from your hips to your wrist.

“Wait! W-Wait!” he gasps, his eyes squeezing shut as he blows a concentrated shaky breath from his lips, his fingertips digging into your arm.

Your eyebrow lifts and you smile as you take in the way his body shakes and shudders as he holds it in for you. He knows how to behave.. what would make you happy.. what would make you disappointed.. After all, he’s been trained by you in more than just tennis.

“Close?” you whisper.

His body starts to slowly relax again as he regains some of his composure. He blinks his eyes back open slowly, looking into yours.

“Very,” he groans.

You pull your hands from his body, and he whines softly.

“Take off the apron. Put it on the floor.”

You’re sure you’ve never seen him move so fast— his hands reaching behind his back and undoing the tied string. Then, he pulls the apron off over his head, tossing it off to the side. He watches you study him with parted lips, and he bites onto his own.

“Now take your sweats off for me.”

He does as he’s told; his shaky fingers reaching down to slip his pants down to his lower thighs, and then down to his knees and ankles, and then he steps out of them. He kicks them gently next to where the apron was thrown, now making a mess of grey and white fabric where both items pooled on the kitchen floor.

You step close to his body, cupping his face before running a hand through his messy strawberry-blonde locks. But it doesn’t take long for your eyes to travel solely down to the bulge prominently pressing against the inside of his navy boxer briefs. You run a fingertip up and over the outline of his dick, relishing in the way it makes him shake. He was now just in his tee shirt, boxers, and white socks, while you stayed fully clothed. But not for too much longer.

"My pretty husband.." you coo to him, making his lips part to let out a few uneven breaths. You glance around his frame and notice a bowl off to the side that had remnants of the soft cookie dough from the first batch of the cookies. You smirk.

You lean forward and swipe your thumb along the inside of the bowl, gathering some of the sugary, buttery mixture on your digit. His gaze remains lidded and locked onto your face, not finding any importance in your hand's movements at the kitchen counter. You bring your thumb back in, showing him what you did.

He spares your thumb a quick glance, but then his eyes are back on yours, and then your lips, and then the way that your breasts are peeking out from the low-cut collar of your work top. You bring your thumb up to his mouth.

"Open," you whisper.

He does as he's told, parting his lips further and leaning in to encourage your finger to slip past them.

You push your cookie dough-covered thumb into his mouth, feeling him immediately begin to suckle on it; his tongue swirled over it, and his eyes fluttered shut right after they began to roll back. His brows furrow, and a couple of faint whines bubble up out of him as the taste of his homemade sweetness melts seamlessly on his palate.

While your thumb is in his mouth, you push it down softly on his tongue.

"Knees, baby," you say breathlessly.

Art knew this command like the back of his hand.

Effortlessly and steadily, he dropped down to his knees one after the other, keeping your digit in his mouth the entire time. He didn't dare let it go. He moved to sit on his calves.

"Good job.. good boy..."

He whimpered, the vibrations of his pathetic sounds causing your hand to buzz slightly.

"I want your mouth on my cunt.. can you do that for me, darling?" you purr, running your hand through his hair for a moment. He nods around you.

"Y'sh, m'm.." he mumbled, trying his best to speak while still relishing your touch with enough attention.

You pull your thumb from the heat of his wet mouth, and smirk as you watch his lips chase after it.

"What was that?"

You already had a good idea about what he had murmured, but it was just.. best to be sure.

"Yes, ma'am," he gasps out softly, his eyes glazed over.

He reaches up and pulls at your skirt, shimmying it down and over your ass and thighs, letting it fall to your ankles. You kick it aside, and lean your back against the countertop. Art positions himself on his knees so that he's on the floor in front of you, looking up at you. His hands shakily reach up to the sides of your pantyhose, his tongue licking out over his bottom lip. He digs his fingers into the taut fabric and looks up at you once more, beginning to pull them down.

Immediately you grab his wrists, halting his movements. His eyes look up into yours, worried that he had made a wrong move, but you shake your head with a soft smile.

"You can rip them."

He doesn't even mean to, but he moans when you give him permission to be a little desperate right now.

In an instant, his strong hands are pulling needily at your tights, causing them to rip from your crotch to your lower thighs. He hooks one of his index fingers into the inside of your panties, his thighs tensing up at the feeling of your wetness, and then he's pushing them to the side. His tongue rests out over his bottom lip as he leans in, holding the back of your leg with his free hand as his eyes flutter shut and he engulfs your heat with his mouth.

"Oh, fuck-!" you yelp, reaching down to tangle your hands in his soft curls, "fuck, fuck, that feels good, Art, don't stop.."

He moans, his eyes squeezed shut as he lathes his tongue up and down and over your wet hole. He lewdly sucks and swallows your slick that's quickly spilling over his tongue, trying to focus harder on your pleasure (and less on the feeling of his cock throbbing rapidly in his boxers.. he can feel himself leaking).

You remove your hands from his hair and move to unsteadily grip the countertop, your back pressing hard against it. Art hums around you in his mouth, moving his tongue up to lick sloppily at your clit. He opens his eyes, his brows furrowed, and looks up at you.

"God, you're so good at this.. you're doing so well.. i'm getting.. close.." you breathe out, studying the upper half of his face while the lower half remains buried in your pussy.

He doubles his efforts, smushing his face deeper against you, his lips pursing to suckle against your sensitive nub as his grip on your leg tightens. Art has half a mind at that moment to just scoot forward a bit and slot your ankle between his thighs, but he won't. You came first, in his mind. Literally, and figuratively.

You sling the leg that he's holding over his shoulder, giving him more access, and then you begin to feel an overwhelming, hot numbness creep over your lower half..

"ANGH!" you moan loudly, squeezing your eyes shut as your body begins to shake. Your fingers grip the kitchen counter so hard that you're afraid you'll break a nail.

"I'm going to cum, Art..!"

"Mm! Mm-mm!"

"I'm.. oh my god.... I'm... I'm-! Cumming-!" you whine, feeling your orgasm crash over you.

"MM-!" he laps at your pulsing cunt, squeezing his eyes shut before forcing them open so that he can watch the way your beautiful face moves to contort in ecstasy.

You groan and whine as your orgasm's aftershocks are uncomfortably prolonged by Art's relentless tongue, and your hands release the marble countertop to reach down and grab two soft fistfuls of his hair. You try to tug his head back from your cunt, but he just closes his eyes and presses his nose and mouth further against your core. The repetitive movements of his tongue over your folds cause lewd, wet noises to fill the kitchen.

"Art... A-Art..! Enough!" you slur out as the pleasure from before starts to melt into a prickly sting of oversensitivity.

His eyes flutter open and you shoot him a warning glance as he peers up at you.

"I said enough, yeah?" you snap, "stand up."

He immediately pulls his mouth away from your sticky body and stands up on shaky legs. His eyes look downward, guiltily avoiding your gaze, as he wipes at the clear slick covering his chin with the back of his hand.

You try to catch your breath for a moment, studying his chest as it heaves up and down -- him trying to catch his breath all the same. You reach out and take his lower jaw softly in one hand, forcing him to look at you properly.

"You got a little fucking greedy there for a minute.. didn't you?"

He bites his bottom lip for a second, nervously chewing on the inside of it as he debates what answer he could give that would result in the least amount of punishment from you.

"Did you hear what I said?" you whisper coldly, taking a step closer to him as your hand grazes against the erection standing proudly in his underwear.

His body automatically jolts forward, and he lets out a shaky breath as his brow twitches. "Yeah.. I did.." he huffs out.

You smirk, wrapping your hand around him over the dark blue fabric, "And what do you think, hm? Were you being greedy?"

He looks deep into your eyes, his lips parting as he feels you start to stroke him. He tries to stop it, but his hips start to shallowly buck against your grasp, and now he can't get any words out. He wants to, but he just.. he really can't.

You roll your eyes.

"You know what I want you to say, honey. Use that big brain of yours."

He moans softly, his hands coming up to hold the sides of your upper arms as his eyes grow lidded.

"I'm.. I was being greedy.. I'm greedy," he moans lowly, thrusting into your hand a bit quicker and with a tad bit more abandon.

"Yeah, yeah you are. You're a greedy little whore for this, aren't you?"

He nods slowly but repeatedly as his brows pinch together and his breathing picks up.

"Yesss," he says brokenly, his voice straining a little as his moans start to become whimpers and whines, "I'm.. s' greedy for you.. jus' for you.. mm..!"

You nod and smirk up at him as his face becomes pinker and pinker, "That's it, pretty boy.. good job. You like when I stroke your pretty cock?"

He lets out an obscenely loud moan as his abdomen curls in over itself a bit, his hands gripping the sleeves of your work top and pulling helplessly at the fabric as he feels a spurt of precome burst into the inside of his boxers.

You chuckle a little as you watch him visibly get closer to his climax, but then he suddenly releases the hold on one of your sleeves and urgently grabs the hand that's moving over his clothed length.

You look down to where his hand holds yours, and he lets out a filthy whimper as he pulls your touch off of him and then urgently pushes your hand past his waistband and down into the front of his boxers. You gasp at his seemingly impulsive actions, feeling your fingers finally come into contact with his slicked-up cockhead. Your fingertips just barely brush over his hot, leaking slit.. sliding over a thick glob of pre.. and then he's being sent over the edge. To the average person, the touch would be essentially imperceptible, but not to him.. not to Art. He was just far too sensitive.

Your husband lets out a startled cry as he doubles over your frame in front of him and frantically moans, his whole body trembling and tensing as his balls draw up, "I'm cumming!"

You don't even have time to really process what's happening until you feel your hand being covered in warm fluid, the substance dripping down your fingertips as Art basically comes untouched. You look up at him, dumbfounded, before you feel your abdomen grow warm and tingly. That was kinda.. hot?

"Jesus, baby," you whisper breathlessly as his hips jolt a few more times before stilling as he gulps air down into his lungs, "didn't realize you were that worked up.. that was a little quick, no?"

He moans softly, still feeling your fingers graze him inside of his boxers.

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to.." he says, his breathing hitching in his throat as he tries to get the words out in spite of the pleasure still thrumming through his veins. He was still rock hard.

You smile, quickly using your clean, opposite hand to pull his boxers down to his lower thighs. His length slaps up lightly against his stomach before bobbing out in front of him, a tiny pearl-like bead of cum still leaking from his tip. He sighs shakily as he looks down at himself, and then up at you. You wrap your cum-covered hand around the base of his shaft, causing Art to jerk forward from sensitivity. He pulls a sharp breath in, his face scrunching up a little as he tries to control his body.

"I'll let you cum again," you start, watching his eyes light up, "but! you need to give me a warning this next time, okay? I want a clear warning, love."

He nods at your words, a more serious expression plastering over his face, "I will, I promise.. I.. I can give you a proper warning, ma'am.." he whispers.

And with that, you slide your hand from his base to his tip in one smooth motion, your thumb gliding over the head.

"GAH-!" he shudders forward, hissing in pain for a moment before he starts to moan again.

"You okay? Can you handle this?" you ask, your tone soft but seductive as you try to tease him but also legitimately check in. You two were always good at looking out for the other's wellbeing during your sessions together; the exchange of love and tender-care came easily to you both-- it was never something either of you had to question.

He nods, "Yeah, yes-ss, I can t-take it.." he slurs a little, watching your hand move up and down over his throbbing length.

"Look up into my eyes, darling," you purr, your hand starting to pick up speed, "does it feel good?"

He meets your eyes, his blue ones swimming with lust and desperation as he felt the beginnings of his second orgasm start to creep in, "Yes, fuck-! Yes! It feels so fucking good--!" he whines.

"Remember what we just talked about?"

He nods fervently, sucking his plump bottom lip in between his teeth as his focus darts from one of your eyes to the other. You speed up your hand, squeezing his shaft a little more to give him some pressure that you assume he needs.

He keens instantly, a loud moan rumbling from his chest as his thighs start to shake and his eyes squeeze shut.

"Art," you murmur in a seductive but warning tone.

He shakes all over, nodding his head, before his back stiffens up and he becomes incredibly tense. You keep your hand moving at the same fast pace, hoping his memory today is as good as his stamina.

"I'm going to cum," he whispers quickly, bringing his hands up to hold onto your shoulders as he pulls you closer.

You smile in approval, leaning in close to his ear and breathing warmly against his skin as you speak softly, "thank you for telling me, angel. do you want to cum for me?"

He nods, whining out a hasty "mhm". He lets out a breathy moan as he feels your hot words against his upper neck.

You press a chaste kiss there, and then you slide your hand up to gently grip his shaft while your thumb moves to rapidly swipe over his frenulum.

"Come."

And he does just that.

Art's back arches as soon as your one commanding word reaches his ears, cumming uncontrollably with an abrupt cry of pleasure. At first, his body is incredibly rigid as he lets go, his brows pinched up together as he feels the first, pulsing waves of his orgasm hit him, but then the full sensation of his release hits him and his whole body shudders deeply. He lets out little breathy moans and gasps as he relishes in the bursts of pleasure rolling over his cock. You slow your thumb down a bit as you watch him spurt rope after rope over your hand and onto the kitchen floor as he comes undone for you a second time.

"Fucking hell," you moan, now going back to stroking him fully instead of just rubbing a digit against his tip.

He grits his teeth in an instant, being pulled from his afterglow by the feeling of your hand forcing him back into a feeling of overstimulation. "Ah-! Ah!.. T-Too much, too much," he whimpers, his hands instinctively reaching down from your shoulders to push at your hand that's currently working him towards a third, uncomfortable orgasm that he's not even sure he wants anymore.

You use the hand that's not stroking him to move his hands away from your occupied one, giving him a small shake of your head.

"Hands behind your back, please. We're not done yet, okay?" you coo.

He quickly follows orders, moving both of his hands behind his back and away from his aching length, although not without letting out a sniffly whine of protest first.

"Please, ma'am.. I'm.. I can't do it I can't do it-- I'm-- AH!"

You cut off his soft moans of agony with a brief squeeze to the base of his dick, looking intently up into his eyes through your lashes.

"If you really want to stop, baby," you tilt your head teasingly, "you can always use the safeword, yeah?"

He bites his lip before he lets out a warped cry, his head lolling backwards in the same instant. You stop moving your hand.

"Art, darling," you whisper to him comfortingly.

He brings his head back upright to look down into your eyes, his face blank with pleasure; he almost looked drunk. His eyes were glazed over, his cheeks were pink, his hair was a mess, and his lips were parted to let out harsh little breaths of air as he tried to regain some semblance of being grounded in his own, ruined body.

You reach your free hand up to cup his jaw, brushing your thumb over the side of his face.

"Does it really hurt that bad? You know that you can be honest," you whisper, now a little concerned that maybe you pushed him too far.

He thinks for a moment before shaking his head slowly and swallowing a bit of drool that he realized has been collecting in his mouth for the past minute or so, "N-Just a little.." he breathes out.

You nod, giving him one soft stroke of his come-covered cock. He gasps and his torso jolts at the sensation, faint tears springing to his eyes.

"Sorry, sorry," you hum, "should we stop here then? I think maybe that would be best for you.. you've already done so well for me.."

The latter half of your sentence, that subtle bit of praise, gives him all the motivation he needs to want to unravel again.

He looks down at his still-hard cock, and then back up at you, and shakes his head. His tongue pokes out over his bottom lip and wets it as he tries to collect his thoughts.

"No.. no, I can do- I can go again, ma'am.. I pro-promise.." he slurs out, thrusting up into your hand.

You raise a skeptical brow at him and his movements, keeping your hand still.

"Are you sure? You know that I won't be upset with you if you want to stop, Art."

He shakes his head again, his lip trembling, "Please."

You smile softly and start to move your hand up and down over his cock again. Despite his previous indications that it was painful, the feeling has now seemed to morph back into unfiltered pleasure as he lets out a high-pitched moan of your name. He babbles endlessly, a mixture of pleas for more, letting out repetitive mumblings of "feels good", and "yes", and an assortment of stuttered expletives.

It doesn't take long for Art to get close again.

"I think 'm gonna come again," he mumbles, letting his eyes fall shut as his head slumps forward against your shoulder. You stroke him quicker, focusing on his hypersensitive tip as you feel a drip of precome come out.

"Oh? You want to come again?" you tease coyly.

You could be cruel sometimes. He had known that this part was coming eventually.

He shakes his head against the crook of your neck with a whine, "don't do this, please.."

You stop your hand at the base of his cock, halting his orgasm just as his load started to rise up his length. Art bites back an obscenely loud moan of protest that is dying to be let out..

"No, no no noo," he squirms against you, repetitively shaking his head as his face remains buried in your neck.

"You know what you need to do, darling."

"Please," he moans, "let me come.."

"You want to come?"

"Yes."

"You do?"

"YES..!"

"How should I make you come?"

"Can y- keep stroking my- I want my cock to be- I-" he mumbles incoherently.

You place your free hand on the back of his head, pushing your fingers pleasurably into his hair as he trembles against you.

"You want me to keep jerking you off? Hm?"

"Y-Yes-ss!" he moans out brokenly, using every bit of restraint within himself to resist the urge to move his hands from behind his back and relieve his aching parts.

He would never do that, though.. no matter how much he wanted to. He would always follow your wants and needs first. Those were most important to him.

"Ask me for what you need again. Nicely; just the way I like it."

"Please, can I come?"

"Again."

He whines, his hips involuntarily bucking up against your stilled hand wrapped around him.

"Please," he sobs, "can I please come for you?"

"Yes, honey, you can come."

You start to stroke his cock once again, and within just a few pumps Art is releasing again. Even though you can't see them because his face is still in your shoulder, his eyes roll all the way to the back of his head as he lets out a couple pitiful squirts of white, sticky liquid over your hand. "Ooh, that's it.. good boy.. are you my pretty little slut?"

When Art hears this, he isn't exactly sure what happens, but it's like the orgasm that's already halfway finished just completely starts over.

"Ohh my fucking- oh my god-dd-! Ugh! HNGH-!"

It's like every single nerve ending in his body is lighting up at once, and he can't do a damn thing about it.. he can't stop it...

His legs nearly go limp underneath him, and he has to lean further into you to prevent himself from collapsing.

Art then releases the most pornographic moans you've ever heard and tenses up in your hold all over again. You're not really sure what's happening until he--

"I'm cumming again! I'm cumm-m-ing-! Again! Ohmyfucking--! GOD!"

He whines and sobs against your body, his arms still held behind his back as you feel his cock jump and pulse in your hand again. This time, nothing comes out. It's odd because it's clear that he's cumming for a fourth time, but there's nothing to show for it.

You slow your hand but continue to stroke his length which is now covered in the creamy-white filth of his previous loads. His cock softens a little, but you're unsure when his orgasm ends because, again, nothing is coming out.

Art's frame suddenly begins to jerk around every time your hand brushes over his tip, and he lets out a hiss of discomfort through his gritted teeth and a sniffle afterwards. As soon as you hear that, you know he's done and you quickly remove your hand. Any extra stimulation and he'd genuinely start to cry. You could save that for another time.. if he wanted you to.

You move your other hand from his hair to his clothed upper back and rub small, comforting circles over it.

"I've got you," you whisper, "you did such a good job, baby. You just came dry for me."

He nods, sniffling wetly and exhaustedly.

You continue to rub his back for a minute or so in silence as he comes back down to earth; the pleasurable waves of his release's aftershocks allowing him to bask in the ebb and flow of it all as he tries to calm his ragged breathing.

"I feel weak," he groans softly.

You nod, "I'm right here, you're okay.. take some deep breaths for me, honey."

He nuzzles deeper against your neck and sighs contentedly, the fuzziness in his head starting to dissipate with your caring words and gentle touch.

"You're my good boy," you whisper, pressing your cheek against the side of his head.

"Mhmm," he hums, "always for you."

⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆. ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆. ⋆ ˚｡⋆୨♡୧⋆ ˚｡⋆.

notes; WOAH. ok. so this has been like months in the making by now i think..? but i finally finished it :D thank u so much to everyone who has been patiently/loyally waiting for this one after i teased it for over a month on this blog 😭 + thank u to anyone who gave me some kind words of encouragement when i had to put this aside for a while. i luv u guys !! <3

reblogs are always allowed + appreciated!

[nymphia-tarot]

Your relationship with them [18+] PAC

pile 1 ----> pile 2

pile 3 ----> pile 4

🍂 meditate on the pics and pick whichever one calls to you the most. this reading is divided into two parts: your general life dynamic and your sex-life. you might feel drawn to more than one pile, which means you may have messages in other piles for you as well! if you don't feel particularly drawn to any pile, the messages in this reading might not be intended for you. since this is a general reading, take what resonates! 🍂

🍂Pile 1:

ᯓ★ General:

I'm getting your person is somewhat ambitious and a planner. They may have come from humble beginnings and thus, they know the value of hardwork and pragmatism. There's probably a lot of LGBTQ+ individuals in this pile. I'm getting a lot of sapphics in particular?

I'm getting your partner embodies the more "dominant" or active energy in the dynamic here. They're probably just used to being the one who does most of the doing in their life. I'm getting workaholic vibes as well. Your person feels like you really pull them off their balance. Or like, you can easily shake them off even when they try to hold themselves together. I feel like for a lot of you it's probably unintentionally too which kinda frustrates them lol.

If you lived together, they might probably be really busy all the time due to their nature as well as circumstances. I feel like work and responsibilities may be overwhelming in the relationship. There might even be arguments due to a clash of values or perspectives about some matters. They might not be able to meet your emotional needs at times due to them generally being more head-oriented. I'm getting warnings from spirit regarding communication. All relationships are built on trust and healthy communication, so don't be discouraged! With time, I feel this could be a very mature and deep relationship based on security, trust and hardwork overcoming obstacles together. However, if issues exacerbate and you find that they're not the right one for you then the choice to decide on the future is always your right.

ᯓ★ In the bedroom:

Your person finds you extremely tempting and irresistible. They may even have been lusting after you for quite a while before you guys got together. I'm getting that they were pining after you heavily and being extremely downbad lol. They love watching you and they may even start fantasizing about you midday whenever they look at you 😭💀 They might do it solo a lot with you in their mind. They might be lowkey afraid that others might feel the same about you and it makes them a bit anxious even though I feel like they might hide it outwardly.

There's a lot of passion in the bedroom between the two of you. Their feelings towards you are very intense, almost as if they're directing it all at once with a laser focus. They might get very consumed in the bedroom, like nothing else exists in the moment except the two of you. They might like receiving oral from you a lot or at least they fantasize about it quite a lot of times. They might even be dominant in the bedroom and have fantasies of you submitting to them. I feel like they're the possessive type, and this might even show from subtle things in the moment like the way they grip you just a bit harder, almost as if they don't want to let you go.

A lot of yall in pile 1 might be pillow-princesses. I feel like you also love teasing your partner, not usually in an overt way but through more subtle mannerisms. Your partner notices this and it drives them craaazyy lol. Overall, I feel like you really satisfy each other in bed and you might also subconsciously soothe a lot of each other's insecurities and deeply-rooted fears. Sometimes, the sex between you two might get so intense that you both lose sight of everything else-- maybe you leave your room/house really messy everytime you do it too. They might like to get rough with you in bed but there's also aftercare and I feel like a lot of you really enjoy the aftercare sessions a lot, almost like that's the main "treat" you're after even though the sex is good.

🍂 Pile 2:

ᯓ★ General:

I feel like quite a lot of my pile 2 individuals are very idealistic people and hopeless romantics. Maybe some of you are even inexperienced in the matters of love and might have a lot of ideas and fantasies about the perfect relationship, which might even be unrealistic at times (hey, nothing wrong with it as long as it's not negatively interfering with your life). I feel like this relationship will be nothing like you've dreamed of, and that's not necessarily in a bad way. In a way, it'll teach you valuable life lessons and give you a more grounded and mature perspective about the reality of relationships.

Your person is a very free individual and they're the type who doesn't hold anything back. Maybe their boundaries are very expansive, and they might appear extremely open and accepting. They might be very materially prosperous and abundant as well. I feel like your person is very sociable and might be someone who belongs to "high society". I'm getting Gatsby vibes-ish outwardly. Very composed, elegant and smooth as well in their exterior-- almost like they have it all together, a social chameleon and a charming influencer.

However, I'm getting that there might be a duality to them. They might even be depressed lowkey. They might not have the healthiest relationship with their emotions. It's like, they were never really taught how to handle pain and they might even keep that aspect of themselves neglected, which might lead to detrimental consequences as a result. Perhaps my pile 2s were drawn to the outer brilliance of this person because they do appear really bright, like a treasure. They seem like the ideal prince of your dreams who could fulfill all your needs initially. However, as the relationship progresses, you discover more and more aspects of them that aren't entirely beautiful. This relationship comes with struggles, especially mental health struggles for a lot of you, and it might even be harder than you initially expected. However, at the end, you will also find a lot of growth individually. Also, I'm getting that some people here in this pile were attracted to both pile 1 and 2 and found overlapping messages relevant to their situation in both piles?

ᯓ★ In the bedroom:

Your person might have some kinkier desires when it comes to the bedroom that they don't just allow anyone to know. I'm getting it might be a bit shameful for them to admit, that's why it's mostly secret. They might even take you to a sex dungeon to do it at times so that you can fulfill that desire.

For your person, sex is a very intimate thing and they might really like privacy in the moment-- in the sense that they're allowing you and you alone to see something noone else is allowed to know. It takes a lot of trust for them to open up, and I'm getting that a major overarching theme in the dynamic between you two is the merging of boundaries and letting yourself go, as if holding nothing back out of a decision to trust and find security in each other.

I'm getting that they might think of themselves as "hideous" deep down, not necessarily in appearance but just as a general feeling. They might see you as something "pure" that they're tainting (kinda depressed vibes yeah). Reminds me of that one Nine Inch Nails song: Closer. Perhaps they even see you as "above" them and might feel undeserving of you deep down. I'm also getting that they really like your chest. They really enjoy sucking them too. Perhaps you might take a more nurturing role in the bedroom for them, soothing them and making them feel loved and safe. You might take control more often than them in the bedroom and they also enjoy getting tied up while you're free to do anything to them. They might like being more on the receiving end of sex. They might also idolise you a lot.

🍂 Pile 3:

ᯓ★ General:

For my pile 3s, what I'm getting is that when you start a relationship with your person you might be in somewhat of a pinch financially. Maybe you or your partner might be having a hard time finding employment or maybe your job will face some problems where it'll be difficult to get by with simply wages. I'm getting that you guys will start a creative partnership. It'll be something decided on a whim, maybe you will just decide to go "fuck it" and take a leap of faith to see where fortune takes you and start a creative outlet, perhaps a new business venture. You (plural) might be full of ideas and innovative spirits.

This relationship will be more of a mutual partnership and you guys are like best friends who are also lovers kinda deal. There are a lot of different people here... for some, I'm getting that you might get an offer for help from the other but you will reject it due to a possibility for imbalance in the relationship and you will choose your freedom and pursue an independent path, which you'll be successful at in the end anyway.

This relationship will lead to a sort of rebirth for both of you as individuals, mostly your person though. They might go through a major transformation in the future of this relationship. In the future, there's a lot of worries and anxiety coming from your end regarding your ability to manifest your dreams. A lot of you are people who like to dream big and have high hopes. So maybe you're afraid that you might not succeed and the circumstances surrounding you will start to weigh on you a bit more than you can handle. However, I'm getting that the hurdles present in this relationship are not only yours to carry alone. This relationship seems very balanced mostly and it's one of those relationships where you both go through troubles together hand in hand to support each other through thick and thin.

ᯓ★ In the bedroom:

I'm getting a lot of emphasis on your bottom. Maybe it's your person's favourite part of your body for them. They really enjoy giving you oral, doing it while watching you from behind or just watching that part of you. The sex between you two might be something that feels really transformative. You might do it a lot to release mundane stress and tension from daily life and it really helps soothe you at the end of the day. They might also enjoy giving you oral from below while you're preoccupied with some work at your desk.

You guys might also indulge in semi-public sex. You might do it in situations where there's a risk of being seen by others. I'm also getting sex in the park lol. You or your person might be into voyeur fantasies as well where there's a third party involved to watch. Or maybe they'll introduce a third party in your sex life as well. However, the focus is more on pleasing you than them and that's what the third party is for. Sometimes, they might even show up at the workplace secretly and have sex with you lol.

I'm seeing that your person genuinely has a lot of deep feelings for you and wants you to be cared for and happy with them. They might express this through sex where they'll focus more on your satisfaction than theirs. It's like, your satisfaction makes them satisfied and turns them on. Sometimes, they might even be really worried that you don't want them as much as they want you. They have a tendency to not voice their discomfort and it might lead to some repressed resentment so an advice I'd give out is communicating your boundaries with each other in a healthy manner. Honestly, deep down what they really want is your attention while you forget about everything else and just focus on them. They lowkey love being pampered and are kinda needy.

🍂 Pile 4:

ᯓ★ General:

For my pile 4s, I'm getting that there's a certain sense of imbalance in this relationship. Your person might be in a position (whether socially, financially, professionally or elsewhere) where they're above you and you guys aren't on equal ground. This might create somewhat of a power dynamic and they might hold more than you do. Be careful, because for some of you I'm getting that there's a potential for abuse here, or some other form of exploitation due to how severely skewed the dynamics of the relationship are.

I'm seeing there's also a good potential for marriage. They might come to you with a marriage offer and do their best to woo you. You're like a wish-fulfillment to your person and they really desire you as someone that seems special and magnetic, like a distant star. For some, I'm getting that you might even be younger than them, or you have a more youthful and bright energy to you that they really admire and look at fondly. It's because you have this spark to you that they find really rare and you pull them in with your brightness. I'm also getting that your presence gives them a lot of hope.

For this relationship, I'm getting that your person likes to hold control over the dynamic. They might lowkey have a manipulative streak in that they make situations go a certain way in subtle manners so that it leads to the ideal outcome they want. I'm getting that a lot of my pile 4s are very intelligent and you might discern them more easily than they think. You two might enjoy playing mind games with each other a lot as a form of stimulation. I'm getting that one anime "kaguya-sama" vibes where the couple did a lot of silly shit to get each other to fall for them lol. Maybe a lot of yall are sapiosexuals as well.

ᯓ★ In the bedroom:

The two of you have really intense chemistry and the sex is extremely passionate as well. It's like when you're together, you tend to drown in pleasure and forget everything else. Really rough sex, intense positions and hot and heavy movements, etc. You guys really get into the moment when you're together and due to that you might end up somewhat sore or just really tired afterwards when you're done.

In a way, I feel like both of you are more focused on your own sensations and pleasure and focus everything to whatever you're feeling in the moment. Not that you don't please each other or don't care about each other at all, but it's more like the feeling of pleasure is the main focus when you're in the bedroom. Something lowkey Dionysian about the moment you're together. You two might both enjoy how messy it can get in bed. You're both very downbad and like to do it anywhere.

Your person enjoys it when you ride on top of them or when you wrap your legs around them. They also really enjoy watching you move violently or roughly while your face is twisted in pleasure while they're going at it. It's the animalistic impulse that really turns them on. Sex for them is a way of touching upon that primitive part of yourself and letting it lose. That's why your sessions can be a bit uninhibited. They might even enjoy gripping you tightly and get stern during sex. They'll always make sure the both of you orgasam and achieve pleasure though. They also love embracing you and touching you in general. They think of you as a queen/king in the bedroom and might even treat you like one in their own way. They're also really into spanking and punishments (either to you or for themselves). Both of you can be very vocal during sex. A lot of people might even gossip about yall.

[yyouzip]

FS pick a pile!

————>>> ★ this reading includes…

- how you’ll meet your FS + your first impression of them

- a description of your FS

- how your FS feels about you and how you’ll feel about them

-what the relationship will be like

-songs with the vibe of you and your fs

-random things that may resonate:

+ a mini mood board :)

CW: very very very brief mentions of sexuality (sexuality as in things about sex and not orientation.)

!! the future is destined to change depending on you, so don’t take this as absolute truth. this is just for fun !!

look at an image, and pick whichever resonates. (it’s totally fine to pick more than one.) take what resonates leave what doesn’t.

pile 1

- how you’ll meet your FS + your first impression of them 9oC, 8oS rx, kingoW. (9oW knightoP 4oW 6oP the world all rx)

so for starters, you might end up manifesting the FS of your wishes with or without realizing. with the 8 of swords rx and king of wands, it looks like you’ll be manifesting them intentionally. after a long journey of manifesting and looking at the big picture with optimism and knowing that this person will come into your life, you’ll be able to sit down and watch them come in without any shock or surprise. you’ll be feeling immense joy and gratitude at their presence. it might have a bit of a kdrama vibe if anything. very cheerful and happy.

your first impression may be/may have been that they are someone who is reserved and unwilling to take risks. they may seem a bit defensive and paranoid and a bit of a perfectionist. as well as someone who comes from a difficult/traumatic background full of conflict and instability. you may get the impression that this person didn’t have a good childhood or home life. they also give the impression of someone who is more worried about taking care of themselves before others. because of this, they don’t give the impression of a generous person. they seem very insecure and as if they are seeing closure or peace somehow. they don’t seem complete as a human and seem to have been broken by their life or the world. :(.

- a description of your FS 2oS, 7oS, 6oC, 4oP, QueenoCups ex, 8oW, 9oS., 8oC

they may seem like someone who wears/has more cool tones? emphasis on the eyes (mb glasses or peculiar/alluring eyes?) someone younger/young looking who wears dark clothing or has a more “edgy” fashion sense. their young look and style of clothing may contrast a bit. they’ll visually have very mysterious and alluring vibe. the kind of person who wanna know more about because they just look mysterious and unique. they might look wealthy and smell very good.

they’ll be very possessive and reserved. unwilling to share with others and refrains from admitting things freely or even speaking a lot. they hide a lot of pain and it overwhelms them. they’ll be very sensitive and dependent on you and break easily when any pressure is placed on them. they’ll still be very exciting and a fast decision maker. who enjoys doing fun things on a whim. just for fun. they might be very fearful and anxious, maybe even to the point of a mental disorder enhancing those issues. the 9oS and 8oC literally popped up out of nowhere and they were hiding in a weird spot, like i don’t even remember pulling them out? makes me think your FS could be the kind of person who hides these issues in particular. they are plagued with the horrible memories of the past and may be prone to nightmares and the idea of abandonment and loneliness is what scares them the most.

- how your FS feels about you and how you’ll feel about them the moon, the magician, 10oP, the fool, kingoP, 4oW

your FS feels like you’re a bit uncertain, and possibly hiding something. this “something” may have to do with something in the realm of loa, shifting, tarot, etc? they see u as someone very very complex and magical. they feel like there’s a bit of an illusion with you and you may be putting up a front. they feel like you’re someone with so much willpower and desire. very great at manifesting and getting what you want and hard work. they think you’re very wealthy and well connected with others. you’re a family person (biological or found family, whatever resonates.) and a loving and kind person with an abundance of wealth and resources at your hand. they think you’re very beautiful and so loving as well as hard working. they love you so much!

you’ll see them as someone who’s very spontaneous and free. they may be younger than you btw. they seem willing to take new chances and a very free spirit. like a wanderer or a traveller innocently stumbling around and enjoying what they run into and willing to accept the world presented to them. you see them as a good business person and an ambitious person. you feel like they are hard working, very rich, and smart. (i feel like you two will be very wealthy..) they seem attractive and sensual to you. they give me sort of of kdrama bf vibes. we’re u trying to manifest yourself a kdrama style romance and fs? hahaha. you feel like they’re a bit unstable and unable to really ground themselves. you feel like they feel unsupported and it makes u rlly sad.

-what the relationship will be like knightoW rx the emporer 6oW, 4oP 8oW

despite the previously stated issues, the relationship will be very healthy and stable. you might be a more authoritative figure in this relationship. w the emperor and the previous cards abt ur fs i’m getting like “daddy/mommy issues” and one person finding comfort in the other for being more mature or a bit older as well more structured. still, energy may be a bit scattered at times and frustrating. it may be hard to communicate with each other and see eye to eye. as well as arguing with no feeling of achievement or recognition. you or they may get a bit egotistic and you’ll seek personal achievement in winning arguments. still, you’ll love each other a lot and want to be close forever and always. you guys may be a bit clingy and very very close. probably possessive of each other. you just love each other a lot and want to be emotionally, mentally, and physically close 24/7! you may propel each other to your goals a lot faster and feel very aligned. overall it’ll be a very emotional but loving relationship.

songs with you and your fs vibe: cool with you by newjeans, either way by ive, basically the whole soundtrack from all about lily chou chou, snooze by agust d, julia and green mile by sza, velvet ring by big thief,

things that may resonate: cats, cars, gaeul from ive (?), the ocean, the sunrise at 6:00 am, the sea again, the number 34, teenagers in love, falling asleep during a long drive, white rooms, accubi fashion, metaphysical stores, stepping into a body of water and its cold for a second

Pile 2

- how you’ll meet your FS + your first impression of them 10oC, 7oS, the empress rx, QoP, AoS rx, KnoW

for starters, your meeting will feel like fate. like an act from the divine and absolute alignment. your meeting will likely be a random coincidence. w 7oS, i see it being the result of sneaking around? maybe you were sneaking our or meeting up with people you weren't supposed to. very "right place right time" kind of situation. you definitely weren't supposed to be in this situation and you likely felt nervous. maybe skipping school/work? you felt on edge and happened to meet this person very coincidentally.

immediately, you thought this person was a practical and smart person. very kind, gentle, and nurturing. they seem very clean and almost luxurious. very goal oriented and sooo gentle. despite this, you likely had a negative first encounter. i think there was alot of bickering and because of this they came off as someone who was greedy and selfish, unwilling to hear from others. they seem very adventurous and passionate with leadership qualities. this is kind of screaming YA novel hahaha.

- a description of your FS PoS, 6oW rx, AoP, PoW, 4oW, KnoW

they have a very unique style of dressing and a heavy feminine energy for sure (that doesnt mean they are female, they just carry a significant amount of feminine energy.) they seem to be a fashion person who is able to creatively make their own unique and beautiful outfits. like the kind of person youd see on pintrest or trending on tiktok. veryyy unique fashion sense with an airy and dreamy sort of feel. like those frutiger aero playlists vibes kinda. and ditto by newjeans if that resonates? they like how they dress and look and dont care what other people think at all. alot of people may dislike their style and even tease/make fun of them for it, but they like it so its fine. their unconventional looks might land them alot of modelling jobs or things akin to that. they also look very dreamy (like their features) and sorta surreal. they give me a y2k vibe.

they're very extroverted and willing to speak to people without any fear or worry for judgement. they're very cheerful and joyous with positive energy all around them. they're well balanced and harmonious, clicking with others very well. also very relaxed and relaxing to be around! they can be very passionate and willing to take a lot of action. i get very smart vibes from them. like extrovert, popular, probably going to harvard kind of person. they really just happily enjoy their life and being alive.

- how your FS feels about you and how you’ll feel about them 5oP rx KoP 8oP rx QoS judgement rx 10oW rx wheel of fortune rx 8oS rx

they feel like youre someone who welcomes them with open arms whenever and wherever. they think you are their recovery or ailment when they loose something. and they feel like you are a positive change to their life/world. you seem very reliable to them and like a stable force in their life. you're very protective to them as well as a strong intelligent being. and to them you're very safe, kind, and sexually attractive. they find you to be very forgiving and independent, able to follow ridgid principles and and be fair and critical when needed. but still, you seem harsh on yourself. they feel like you need to learn to love yourself better and stop doubting yourself as well as stop self loathing.

you feel like they lift a burden off of your shoulders. like they release your pains and worries by being with you. but sometimes, they feel overwhelming. maybe you like to be alone often? so as much as you love them, you can get a bit overwhelmed and fatigued. they make you feel like youre a bit of a babysitter at times and not a partner. you feel like they try to micromanage things and control what can't be controlled, and it's a bit troublesome. regardless, you adore them. it feels like they can be a bit too spontaneous and it feels like you have sudden, unwelcome changes in your life that are a result of them. with them, you think you can release your negative thoughts and embrace the positive. they make you feel like you can run away from the harsh realities around you and be embraced by freedom. when you're with them, you feel like you're dreaming a bit, in a good way. like you're in another reality where you don't have negative self thoughts and your inner critic shuts up.

-what the relationship will be like KoS 5oS rx the heirophant death

itll be mentally empowering, like for the first time the both of you will have your feelings validated. one of you will be more authoritative, but itll be mutually agreed upon so dw. being w them feels like understanding absolute truth almost. like you dont need to think about other things when you're with them. you just need to love them and enjoy it. in a way, its like being with them was the death of your past pain and negative cycles, and reconciling with love as you grow a love for it. you're arguments wont even be like real arguments, just constructive conversations leaving everyone happy in the end. v v mature. you both may be very spiritual/religious and your relationship might be very traditionally. maybe you're both from the same culture or religion and bond over it.

songs w u and ur fs vibe: sex drugs etc. by beach weather, all night by beyonce, get up by newjeans, potage by tricot, future by paramore, mistakes like this by prelow, crying lightning by arctic monkey, promise by jimin, i need u and run by bts, luma from super mario galaxy

things that may resonate: the colour blue, hyyh/bts youth trilogy, running away from home, adventure, spray paint, youth, teenage years, kpop girl group leaders, rose quartz, a mature or older fs w a "sexy" image, friend groups, enemies to lovers ?, reading and intelligence, femininity and sensuality, shifting realities, academic validation, skateboarding in the suburbs during summer

Pile 3

- how you’ll meet your FS + your first impression of them AoC rx the empress rx 5oC rx 7oW the sun rx 3oW rx 10oW rx

youll be feeling depressed most likely, feeling gloomy and empty because of insecurities and self neglect. like very very low mood (i wanted to cry as soon as i pulled these cards bro. like my eyes keep watering wtf. like pile 3 are u guys good???iufyjidsuhy ily take care pls). your creativity may be blocked and you might be upset because of your depression/bad moods. because of this, you may be trying to find positives in life. like going out, self care dates, etc. trying to move on from this might end with you meeting new people. from this, looks like youll meet your fs. and fight your depression and sadness in the name of your love for this person. like for example, u may have no will to go on, but you push forward because of this person.

u might feel like this person is is pessimistic and gloomy. a bit dry too. yet, youll have high (semi unrealistic) expectations for them. like they themselves are supposed to fix you and your life. they seem like they arent punctual and maybe are a bit immature upon first impression. as well as someone who burdens themselves with alot of work. they seem like theyve burdened themselves with too much and now collapse.

- a description of your FS 4oS the devil 9oW rx 6oC 8oP rx KoP 9oC the world rx

they have very very heavy masculine energy (doesn't mean they are male, but they have a strong masculine energy about them.) they have a tired and sleepy kind of look, maybe 'senpaku' eyes. kind of like a billie eilish kind of tired/sleepy look. they look like theyre a song by the neighbourhood, if that makes sense. their fashion sense is dark and edgy, like kind of grunge, goth, emo, or a lot of dark colours and piercings generally. they are youthful looking though. with 9ow rx they might look a bit intimidating and harsh. very very edgy though like alot of dark colours. the image of silver rings and jewelry on slim fingers kind of at night comes to mind. they may like the occult and wear occult symbols.

they might be a bit lazy. maybe they currently work in a retail job or in fast food? but regardless they do not enjoy work at all. "i dont dream of labour" fr. they can rush things and might have a problematic reputation. but w KoP they dont really care. they are a reliable person with a good understanding of business and a secure self image. they are very kind and probably quite wealthy. with KoP and 9oC its like they come from a very rich background. they like to spend money often as they have alot of it and enjoy the pleasures of life. as well as spoiling their partner. they feel very content with their life and wouldn't change how things are, even negative things. still, they feel like something is missing and they haven't achieved much, especially for their age. this person gives me party vibes. somehow, theres a bit of emptiness inside of them, like a hole they just can't fill with no explanation as to why.

- how your FS feels about you and how you’ll feel about them 8oS rx PoC rx 6oC rx the emperor the magician judgement rx

they think you are capable of more than you know, and they just really wished you knew that. you're like, incredible in their eyes. like a shooting star or something. they think you're getting way better and you're opening up to new, less harmful, perspectives. they think you neglect your inner child and they feel like you're using escapism too much. they feel like you need to open up and be emotionally vulnerable with them. they think you can be a bit immature at times. they want you to be more independent and move forward. they want to travel the world with you, and be with you, and love you.

you see them as someone with discipline and authority. someone who's smart, capable, and stable. you feel like they can protect you and be your shield when the world attacks you. you see them as a proactive person who works hard for their ambitions and for the relationship. they're exciting and experimental. you feel a bit 'in denial' about the relationship in some ways and like you've been ignoring or overlooking something in the relationship. its hard to say what, though. maybe you've been judging them unfairly?

-what the relationship will be like KnoP 7oP rx KoW PoS rx

you'll both take your time with it all, with no rush or 'skipping steps'. you may not realize they are the love of your life for a few years, or you may realize it but not take action. you'll both be insanely loyal. like, "slow and steady wins the race" kind of thing. you guys are perfect together and every moment is perfect, so there is absolutely no rush at all <3. but this "taking time" approach may leave one or both of you feeling impatient. at times, it might even feel like theres little or limited reward to this approach. regardless, with KoW, you can both look into the big picture and understand why you shouldn't be moving toooo fast. you or your fs will be very bold at times, romantically or maybe sexually. youll both be very energetic and taking the lead at different times. very cute and very romantic date nights. you both may struggle with communication at times and take pleasure in "being right" instead of agreeing.

songs that have the vibe of u and ur fs: colours by halsey, sweater weather by the neighbourhood but specifically the part after 2:19, born to die by lana del rey, no escape by health ft the nbhd, basically everything by the nbhd, tonight you are mine by the technicolors, we used to be friends by the dandy warhols

things that may resonate: the numbers 1218? victorian architecture, life is strange (video game), cyberpunk aesthetics, alita battle angels, college or late teens, pride, piercings, silver, gray, smoke, sneaking out to go to rock/punk concerts in the evening, beer cans, young adulthood, electric guitars, hobie from spiderverse

Pile 4

- how you’ll meet your FS + your first impression of them 7oW the chariot the empress justice rx 10oS 6oC rx

you might have unjustly gotten into some trouble/accused of something you never did, but you, knowing yourself and what's right, stood up for yourself without shame. in this moment, you succeeded in defending yourself. your fs was likely present, and found you attractive and was amazed by you and your gracefulness as well as determination. you came off as the kind of person who knows what they want.

they seem like they have been betrayed and are exhausted. like they've been through alot and have been pushed around by others alot. the world turned it's back on them and those that love them have betrayed them. they seem like they have a heavy energy and carry alot of pain. with 6oC reversed they seem like they are older and more mature, someone who makes you think about the future, but seems stuck in the past. (iff that makes sense?). they seem like a very independent person who walks alone after being hurt by others.

- a description of your FS 3oW 9oW rx 2oC the moon 5oP rx temperance

they're very confident in their appearance, they may have beautiful eyes or glasses that make them look very nice. kfjshk idk y i get a big forehead vibe from them? haha. they might seem a bit emotionless and stiff, tsundere kind of look. they may look a bit tired and have eye bags. this person's eyes may be very significant. they might have a very symmetrical look to them and maybe pale skin? fs may be slim and have coloured eyes (like blue or green) and light hair. i get some masculine energy from them (does not mean they are male, but they have masculine energy.)

they're very secretive and prefer their privacy. theres alot that they hide and they are a very complex person. they follow their intuition and it often leads them in the right way. i feel like they have prominent pisces placements. they often feel a bit confused and may not be super smart. they feel welcomed by you and are in the process of recovering from alot of loss, greif, and pain. they feel more positive and like life is changing for the best. they're very patient, calm, balanced and relaxed.

- how your FS feels about you and how you’ll feel about them the hermit AoW rx 7oS 9oC rx 7oP rx 9oP rx strength temperance

they might think you're a bit lonely and silent, shy but knowledgeable and deeply wise. they think you're someone who is endlessly growing and understanding themselves. you're consistently looking for new opportunities to grow and searching deeply within your soul for change and growth. they think you have alot of ideas and things to share, but you hold back and aren't saying these things. they think you're a bit sneaky and are good at lying or manipulating others. (not them necessarily) and you're incredibly smart and strategic. they find this (and you) very attractive.

you think they are a bit unfulfilled, and missing something in their life. you feel like they should try and achieve better things sometimes. bc w 9oC 7oP they seem to be a bit lazy at times and a little bit toooo relaxed. with 9oP, u may feel like they may spend money a bit too much and be somewhat superficial. they also may have issues with not being alone and independent, which they're a bit more accustomed to. giving them alone time is important. but they're insanely strong and brave to you. able to face the deepest and harshest of issues without breaking a sweat. you find this very endearing and they're incredibly caring and loving towards you even in your worst moments. you quite literally could do everything wrong and hurt them infinitely, but they'll always and forever love you and hold you gently. they seem very relaxed and balanced, tranquil and peaceful. very patient and understanding too. you feel very harmonious and tied to them.

-what the relationship will be like queen of wands 10oP rx KnoW KoS

the relationship will make you both feel confident and happy. you'll be very emotionally open and not clingy/attached the hip. you'll both have the independence you crave/prefer, and be confident in your love and relationship. you might argue/have disputes with their or your family over the relationship. it may be unconventional or controversial in your community. outside opinions may find their way to you guys and hurtful opinions will definitely cause hurt and discomfort. you may have an open relationship or something of the sort, or a very exciting and spontaneous period in the relationship. KnoW = this will likely be beneficial in the long run. you'll both have high standards for each other and expect the absolute best from one another. you don't argue often as you're able to control your emotions well.

songs that have you and your fs vibe: trash by alex g, advice by alex g, exquisite tension by youll never get to heaven, the man who died in his boat by grouper, blue city by nahee, to us by apro ft wave to earth and wavy, heavy water/id rather be sleeping by grouper, roslyn by bon iver

things that may resonate: the year 2002, liminal spaces, IT department of a company, marriage and kids, nuclear family, electronics, young love, first love, "nerd", napoleon dynamite, south and south east asia in the early 2010s?, "her", twilight

Pile 5

- how you’ll meet your FS + your first impression of them 5oS rx 10oS 7oC 9oC rx 10oP KoW judgement < < < those 3 r all rx

for starters, youll be pretty upset in whatever this situation is. you were betrayed pretty badly and you're learning that winning isnt everything and sometimes situations can be lose-lose. you may be wanting to get revenge or sabotage someone over a hurt past. you may have gotten heartbroken and are now on the search for a new lover. with 9oC rx you may not be looking for something serious, but something that can make you happy for a while and supress your boredom and lack of fulfillment. maybe you want to make your ex jealous? with 7oC it looks like youll have alot of options at your disposal, but alot of these options are like illusions and are not what they seem.

you met in a non-traditional way. maybe a hookup? you think they're controversial and seem broke (compared to you, that is.). like your standards are too high for them. they seem unstable and like their wealth and success is limited or disappearing quickly. they give celeb vibes, and in your eyes they're on the road to being irrelevant. they seem power hungry but its a total turnoff as you can't see them being a strong leader. (you give the vibes of someone who watches the wizard liz haha). they seem like they don't learn from the past and aren't self aware.

- a description of your FS 7oP KnoP the sun KoW KnoW the world 4oW rx 5oP 3oW

very very veryyy strong masculine energy. (doesnt mean they are male, just their energy!) (also, sorry if i use he/him pronouns to describe this person. again, doesnt mean theyre male but the masculine energy is strongggggg here.). they look like they work very hard and are put together and wealthy looking. they alwaysss look good and smell good, youll never catch them lacking ever. idk how to explain it but they look very like wattpad rich guy kinda energy haha. they doesn't need to go all out to look good. wearing designer and kinda semi formal attire? they look stoic and doesn't express his emotions frequently. the looks very wealthy and successful, may have dark/tan skin and has very good skincare and hygiene. they look incredibly intimidating and has a resting bitch face. looks mean and scary but also sexy and alluring. looks like the "strong silent type". i also feel like they have a bts jungkook vibe (this doesnt mean jungkook is gonna be ur fs at all btw they just have his vibe so please dontldksfjhdjsf)

he feels like they belongs where they are, which is almost on top of the world. they've achieved a lot in their life and are prideful in themselves. they've travelled alottt in their life and met many powerful people. their home life was rough and they had a troublesome childhood. they welt unwelcome at home and probably still do to a degree. they may be undergoing hardship when you first meet them, and feel lost, cold, and alone. with the 4oW and 5oP, they may have somehow disgraced or embarrassed their family. i think this has to do w a family business and losing assets/money. i see this family being rich and wealthy (like chaebol kind of thing). they feel restricted and alienated. things aren't moving forward fast enough for their liking and it's frustrating to them.

- how your FS feels about you and how you’ll feel about them judgement QoW wheel of fortune the empress death rx page of wands temperance

they see you very very well. they see you as someone who can take care of business, and change what needs to be changed. in your professional life and love life. you're a hard worker who people always listen to. they think you're charismatic and very confident in yourself. no one can ever deflate your ego or break your confidence. they're very attracted to this and find you passionate and an incredible socializer. i see you as some kind of business person in the future?? they think unexpected things in your life happen constantly and you're very fortunate and lucky constantly. you're extremely physically attractive to them and incredibly disciplined and hardworking. they find you very nurturing and sexy.

you think they can be afraid of change and repeat negative patterns alot. they are unwilling to take risks and let go of the past, which you feel is a source of all of their problems. you want them to come out of their shell and stop living in the shadow of others who you feel are unimportant. "you're the main character of your life, so act like it." you think they're very lively and expressive despite what others think. they're spontaneous and fun. they're balanced and calm and patient with you, which you adore. what was once spontaneous and a fleeting romance/fling (PoW) turned out to be something beautiful and meaningful thats going to last for a very very long time. (temperance)

-what the relationship will be like 10oW AoP the lovers rx PoC rx justice 6oP rx the magician

it's not going to be very easy, alot of work will need to go into it. with 10oW and the lovers rx it looks like you two may be prone to arguments and butt heads often, meaning alot of effort will need to be put into maintaining the relationship. you both are very very physically attractive, and im getting a young vibe here, and alot of money on both ends (esp w AoP) so you have alot of options as far as other partners goes. and with PoC you're prone to getting bored of one person. therefore you'll need to make sure to work hard on both ends to keep things health and even monogamous. with AoP i see even more financial abundance with this union. as if this relationship is a financial investment. you'll be an incredibly privileged couple, able to pay for expensive dates, gifts, and trips. if you don't put in the work, itll be disharmonious and boring. if hard work is put in, romantic attempts and efforts will be rewarding and both will be treated fair and with immense love. one of you may be controlling or overbearing as far as power dynamics may go. and gifting the other alot while getting nothing in return. this might not be bad though. the magician = being proactive and manifesting your desires, so this excessive gifting and power dynamic may be mutually agreed upon.

songs that have the vibe of u and ur fs: closer to you by jungkook, pray for me by the weeknd ft kendrick lamar, los angeles and crown by seulgi, i am by ive, unforgettable by french montana ft swae lee, famous by french montana, escapism by raye

things that may resonate: extreme wealth, jungkook vibes (i promise this doesnt mean its jungkook its just the VIBES so..😭😭), city at night, sportscars with lights in them, the colours purple, red, and green, the wizard liz, manifesting money, rich networking parties, feminine ceo energy, wealthy business people, shanghai and beijing, qatar and dubai, wonyoung

Pile 6

- how you’ll meet your FS + your first impression of them 4oW poW AoC rx the world poS 6oP

you met this person at some kind of gathering, like a wedding, baby shower, party etc. or a reunion of sorts. you were feeling extroverted and spoke to them completely out of the blue after experiencing a series of emotional instability and emptiness. as well as creative losses/blocks and difficulties. you likely flirted with them out of nowhere for the sheer "yolo" feeling. love that for u tbh.

they seemed like they really belonged and were having a good time at this event (im getting wedding tbh.) and they were a very achieved, successful, and strong individual with a sense of harmony and fulfillment. they seemed very witty and funny, alert and smart. able to make a great and pleasant conversation, v fun to talk to! they came off as very generous and kind as well as someone helpful to their community willing to give away their fortune for the good of others.

- a description of your FS 10oW AoW rx 2oS rx AoS justice rx 10oP 6oC rx

they look strong, muscular, rugged and hardworking. they have a larger frame and some masculine energy (masculine energy doesn't mean your fs is male, just their energy is masculine.) they may have prominent facial hair (eg. beard, strong bushy eyebrows, etc.) they appear a bit nervous and anxious. despite a muscular build they look passive, timid, and nervous. they have a gentle and cuter face.

they're smart and constantly have new ideas and breakthroughs. they have an incredibly creative mind and may be an author? they often avoid accountability and can be dishonest and unfair. they have family issues and dispute with others about finances and assets. they are mature and move on from the past rather than living in a nostalgic past 24/7.

- how your FS feels about you and how you’ll feel about them wheel of fortune rx PoP the magician rx 3oS rx 3oP rx KnoC

they feel like you can be unfortunate at times and find yourself in unfortunate scenarios. you try to cling onto control but fate often has other plans for you. they would like you to just accept that some things can't be changed. they feel like you're incredibly talented, but dont use your talents when it'll make your life easier. they feel like you're incredibly diligent though, and have an incredible sense of loyalty and duty. they see you as an incredibly intelligent person who's going to do incredible things one day. like, they see you and think "they'll change the world". they're incredibly in love with you and feel like their world revolves around you. they love u sm.

you think they're a bit emotionally repressed, but you for some reason feel extra compelled to forgive and accept them and their faults or wrongs. you feel extra forgiving towards them. you think they can be a bit competitive and uncooperative, which may be the source of pain and arguments? but still, they're great at mediating arguments and are incredibly skillful and smart. they're diplomatic and resourceful. they're an overall joy to be around and are loving and thoughtful. they're extremely romantic and flirty!!!

-what the relationship will be like QoC strength QoP 2oW rx

the relationship will be extremely therapeutic and loving. a strong sense of comfort and mutual trust will be built, creating an extremely healthy environment. the relationship will not only be deep romantically, but platonically. you'll be the absolute best of friends as well as loving union of partners. the people around you are likely to be admiring your relationship, too enamoured with your love to feel envy. you hype eachother up 24/7 365 and are the source of each others overgrowing confidence. like this is peak healthy relationship. you live comfortable and luxurious lives and are wealthy, especially in emotion and love. with QoC strength and QoP you're likely to live as a happy and comfortable married couple and grow old together. the relationship is stable and comforting with both sides being madly in love with the other and their presence. goals may be reached spontaneously rather than with slow effort and intense planning.

songs with the vibe of you and your fs: rip tide by vance joy, the astronaut by jin, moon begins by florist, everything stays by olivia olson (adventure time), good habits (and bad) by saba lou, butterfly (prologue mix) by bts

things that may resonate: the 80s, backpacking across europe and south east asia, travel, charity, travel to hot climates, suburban homes, adoption, 2 kids and a pet, wealth, hiking and outdoors, forests, 2nd grade, settling down, summertime memories that feel like pixie dust

I hope you enjoyed !! take what resonates, leave what doesnt :p.

[sasageyolevi]

Hello can give dating levi ackerman x reader headcanons please 🙏 ☺

hi !!! i've been wanting to do one of these for a while , so here goes :

*p.s. let me know if you want a more nsfw version in the future ;)

content : levi x reader , just fluff !!

levi ackerman dating headcanons :

•••

levi is definitely one of those guys that has a hard shell on the outside but can be very soft on the inside if he finds the right person, and you happen to be that person

he is a man of very few words around those who he isn't very comfortable with, but he tries to be more talkative around you

even though he may not say much at times, he really does love you and means it when he does express it

levi's love language is acts of service, so you'll often find him doing simple tasks for you, from putting the dishes away to dusting every single piece of furniture

he is genuinely a very sweet person who just wants to make you feel comfortable and attended-to at all times

he will always be there for you if you're struggling mentally, physically, or emotionally

he is actually a decent cook, and you love to watch him prepare all of his new recipes

obviously, levi is a major clean freak, so this plays a large role in your relationship, and it can sometimes cause problems if you tend to leave a messy space or not clean up after yourself

however, communication is key with him; as long you talk it out, there shouldn't be many problems

on the more serious side of things, levi - like most of us - struggles with his mental health at times, so he needs someone to talk to and to understand him

he can often get moments of loneliness, depression, and anxiety, so checking up on him every so often is key

personally, i think levi would struggle with symptoms of ocd or ocpd, and they would affect his daily life at times

for example, needing to be in constant control and doing everything in a strict, orderly fashion is important to him

if he has any compulsive behaviors present, those would make him feel very anxious and overwhelmed

he checks the oven, curling iron, light switches, windows, and the doorknobs multiple times before leaving the house or going to bed, which can be very time-consuming, so work with him

speaking of going to bed, levi finds it very difficult to sleep sometimes due to his insomnia

he's been through a lot and has seen some of the worst things imaginable, so his mindset is "if i don't sleep, i won't be able to have nightmares about those awful moments"

he doesn't like telling you about his insomnia, because he wants to make sure that you get adequate sleep

however, a little bit of tea and consolation may get him to open up to you about his issues

when you two are cuddling, levi's arms tentatively wrap around your waist in a spooning position before you curl into him

he hates being little spoon, as it makes him feel like a vulnerable kid, so that only happens once in a blue moon

if you get periods, he is completely understanding of your symptoms and will always be there to rub your stomach, give you a massage, or even just let you cry into his shoulder

he is very worried for your health when you get sick, as he has lost too many of his closest friends ;(

therefore, he can be overprotective of you (regardless of whether you want that or not) but you know that he has good intentions

also, extremely random but i have a personal hc that levi absolutely loves 80s and 90s rock n roll, like he is such a depeche mode fan

levi loves you so incredibly much, and although he may not say it 10 times a day like some other people (i'm looking at you, reiner), he expresses this love in a multitude of other ways, and always makes sure that you both feel loved .

[liamobrienlove]

My MCM Comic Con Experience

Oh y'all, i have been wanting to talk about this to anyone who will listen haha Sorry this post is a bit late but it's been busy at work since i got home.

Where do i even begin? I met Liam! Still seems surreal even though i have photo evidence haha Let's just start with meeting him!

First up on the Saturday morning was meeting up with the amazing @formulares - who is amazinnnng btwwwww! had so much fun! 10/10 would recommend being friends with him lmao

Next it was time to get in and get in line for the Liam autograph! CR had their own section for autos which was great because the queues were SO LONG. Luckily, we were like 5th in line! When they all came out, the whole room erupted and the cast looked utterly amazed and completely taken a back with the turnout. Here starts the whole Liam experience haha I made Ares go first because i just couldn't and to watch is conversation with Liam was special. Liam is a special guy, i'll say that.

When i got to him, i was so nervous and he just made me feel like we were old friends. I gave him some letters i had to give and then the dice i'd brought him and he was so happy and rolled them! got a Nat 1 on his first roll but rerolled because halfling luck hehe and got a much better number! i then was able to tell him how much his characters and he have helped me through a lot in recent years and he was so grateful and wrote a lovely message on my print i was getting signed (which i'm not going to share yet as i will most likely be getting it as a tattoo) and then that was the end of the auto portion! when i went in for my photo with him, he remembered me! ahhhh and then we had the cutest picture and he gave me a bug cuddle as i was leaving. Liam is an amazing human, so kind, sweet and humble. I'm hoping i get to meet him again in the near future because truly, one of the best moments i've ever had.

Then i had photos with Travis (who was making sure to ask everyone their names and shake their hand before the photo) and was thanking everyone as well once they were done. it was so sweet!

I did have a Sam photo op but because i was anxious about not making it to my Taliesin one (sam's was the same time as Travis), i gave my photo ticket to Ares who had a great picture with Sam (who is really tall!). Next it was time to have my photo with Taliesin who is just a super sweet man and was wonderful! i love my photo with Taliesin so much! he was so excited to meet everyone!

Now, onto meeting Matt! Bear in mind i queued for three and a half hours to meet him. One thing i will say is MCM need to work on their queuing system because the line for matt was 4 people wide and just didn't seem to go down! By the time i got to the front i was emotional and overwhelmed and i think Matt could see that right off the bat. He shook my hand and asked my name and then we jumped into what was a very amazing and sweet conversation, where when i started to get emotional, Matt took hold of my hands (he's an utter sweetheart) and when i told him how much this show, this world had changed my life, he was just so receptive and so humble about it all and just amazing. Then he got up to give me a hug and it was so sweet of him - that man just adores every single person/fan. He spent time talking to every single person and stayed late to make sure everyone got to meet him.

i cannot begin to put into words how amazing they all were. From seeing Travis, Laura, Ashley, Marisha, Sam and Tal interact with everyone when standing in line, to how they were in photo ops - this cast are genuine and amazing. I count myself lucky to have been able to see them in person and cannot wait until i'm able to again in the future. I just adore them and it's an experience i will never, ever forget.

[astroyongie]

ZeroBaseOne January Reading 2024

note. please take it lightly and enjoy

HanBin

Love: he is currently single after he had been friendzoned. I dont think that he is actively searching for a relationship at the moment. Hanbin is learning o have more self respect for himself and he has stopped talking with people on social media to give himself some time 

Career: He is frustrated with the group when it comes to the recognition. He feels like ZB1 isnt being recognized enough and eh wants to do more. However his hasty energy can become overwhelming for his group so he needs to learn to calm down a little and give time to things 

Self: I believe that eh has a lot go negative self thoughts and talks which isnt the best for his mental health. He is also the type that have been restricting himself a lot (probably diet?). in any case he isnt in a good place mentally 

JiWoong

Love: Jiwoong is in love and dating at the moment (this is someone he dated even during his trainee period). As far as I can see, his relationship is healthy and going well. He is happy which is the only thing that matters 

Career: in contrast with Hanbin, Jiwoong is fairly positive with the group and he believes that they have already achieved a lot and that they just need to keep working for things to work their way. He is very career focused 

Self: he is a perfectionist and he struggles a little with what he can’t do well and what he cannot achieve. He tries very hard to keep a perfect image of idol and this can be complicated with time 

Hao

Love: he is in love with someone but he is single. He also knows that the person he likes doesnt love him back but that doesnt seem to disturb him much. He knows about it and he is still loving the person and waiting what life has to give them (yet he doesnt restrict himself and he can talk with other people) 

Career: he has so much anxiety when it comes to his job and his career because he doesnt know what the future holds for hate group. This lack foresight is what makes him anxious. He fears the unknown and he thinks the company are doing a terrible job when it comes to scheduling work. 

Self: he is going through a rough moment physically and also mentally. I think both are linked, when he isnt doing well mentally his body feels more sick and tired. And when he is having body aches that reflects itself on his motivations 

Matthew

Love: his situation is rather complicated. He isnt in a relationship but his sponsorship is very present on his life. I think theres probably some toxic or restriction going on here when it comes to his love life, but I can’t really unclutter this 

Career: he is calm and serene when it comes to his career. He trusts that things are going to be in their favor and he is finding time for his health mid work. Matthew seem to be very conscious of his idol image and he wants to be someone who’s calm and collected 

Self: again, he is doing rather well. He is someone who sticks with his routine to keep his mental and his physical form sane. He is also someone who is very focused on his work and as long as that is okay, he feel good too. 

TaeRae

Love: he is single at the moment but he might have a crush on someone that works close to him. However for the moment he hasn’t been frontal about his feelings and he is just seeing things from afar. He also sees this crush as something that will pass with time 

Career: theres some draaaamaaaa happening here I see ?? Taerae is very jealous of someone in the group and that always puts him in a moody energy whenever that members gets parts that he would wish to have. He is aware this is stupid but he can’t help it 

Self: his mind has been very focused on his expenses. He tries his best to pay off his debts and keeping as much money as he can so he doesnt lose control and also because he wants to have a financial background that sticks in case this goes downwards. 

Ricky

Love: Okay Ricky is comigo out of a very harsh breakuo that he needed to conduct after his debut. This breakup was career decision and it did really hurt him to leave that person behind. But it was a sacrifice he had to do (or so, he believes) 

Career: he honestly sees expansion when it comes to his career. He has a good sponsorship behind him and it seems here that the company is also favoring him when it comes to overseas projects. Ricky will have a busy year thats for Sure

Self: he feel very bad overall because of his relationship that he had to break and thus breaking the heart of the person he cared for. But he also feels bad for his members, and he might sometimes be a little to harsh with some of them 

GyuVin

Love: his love life started really badly. Gyuvin had a crush on someone and that person rejected him. Because of that he feels like he isnt worth of love and he keeps comparing himself to other guys to see what he lacks. 

Career: he has been very upset about his career, very restless. I believe that he works a lot and he pushes himself a lot because he has impostor syndrome and the believe he isnt on the same level than the other members 

Self: despite that he tries his best to stay focused and to stay stable (he does struggle in this). Just like Taerae he is also focusing a lot on money management  

GunWook

Love: he is a little impulsive.. I believe that he is single and that he might have recently scared one girl by being a little too pushy with them (probably to get his number). I think he lacks comprehension in these type of things 

Career: expect something involving him happening (this could be a rumor or a scandal or his name being thrown around for no reason) or it could be something more positive (him having some type of solo work, like photoshoot, being talked most in a comeback or being a mc, ect

Self: he is self limiting himself a lot when it comes to his personality. I believe he has the idol image in the group that his the total oposite of what he truly is since it makes him frustrated 

YuJin

Love: I dont know his age since he is the Maknae but it does seem nevertheless that he is in a relationship with someone as well (probably someone he met at school). I dont have much to say other that he is too, very happy 

Career: he is happy with his career but he still thinks that a lot of things aunt okay. He might sometimes avoid some of his co workers or have some conflicts with other members for things he judges stupid

Self: he is procrastinating a lot in his opinion. He doesnt feel like he is doing much in the group and he feel like he isnt working a lot either compared to th other members but he also doesn’t have the energy to do so 

[archiveikemen]

Liam Evans Main Story: Chapter 24 (Blind Love)

Premium Avatar Challenge Story

I do not own any of the Ikemen Series content being uploaded on this blog, everything belongs to CYBIRD. Please support them by playing their games and buying stories. Not 100% accurate, expect mistakes.

read this before interacting with my posts

After submitting an important report, I ran into Liam who looked at me with an anxious expression.

(This is the first time I’m seeing Liam this anxious. Did something happen…?)

Kate: W-What’s the matter? Is someone hurt? Or…

Liam: Kate… I don’t… I don't like…

(Huh—?)

Kate: You don’t like what? Did someone do something to you that you dislike? Was it Jude? Or…

Liam shook his head in denial and his expression didn't change.

Worried about him, I gently stroked his back to calm him.

Kate: It’s okay, take your time. Liam, please tell me what’s on your mind.

Kate: … Did something happen?

I looked into his rose coloured eyes while stroking his back, and Liam stared straight at me.

Liam: I…

Liam: Kate. No matter how hard I try, I don’t think I can lead a proper life.

Liam: My curse and episodes won’t disappear. I’m bound to make mistakes again in the future.

Liam: And I think… I don't deserve to want you. You’re way out of my league.

(Huh…)

(... Liam wants me?)

Liam: I’ve been thinking about those things over and over again… and now, the time for you to leave this place has come.

Liam: But no matter how hard I tried to think it through, however much I tried to make myself give it up, “here”... the core of my heart is screaming that I don’t like it.

The things Liam was saying to me were in bits and pieces, but I couldn't interrupt him.

Even just one second earlier, I wanted to know what exactly he was driving at.

Kate: Liam, what is it that you don't like…?

Liam: … Kate.

Kate: … Hm?

Liam took a deep breath and spoke.

Liam: I don’t like the thought of living in a world without you in it…

Liam: Don’t leave, Kate. Please, please, please… stay with me…

(...)

Liam’s passionate gaze and his words made all strength leave my body.

Before I knew it, my legs had given way and I was sitting on the floor.

Liam: K-Kate!?

Kate: Ah… um…

Kate: … I’m just too surprised because I didn't expect you to say those things.

I looked up at Liam like a fool and the gears were turning in my head.

(Hang on. This means…)

(Liam sprinted all the way here because he thought I was leaving?)

(And so he was desperately trying to convey his love for me…?)

The faint feeling of hope swelling up in my chest grew too much for me to bear any longer, and my chest felt tight.

(I need to say something. Quick, tell Liam that I’m going anywhere—)

But I was feeling too overwhelmed to say anything.

Liam sat down on the floor with me and looked into my eyes.

Liam: Kate. I like the things you say. I like your smile. I like your heart. I like everything about you.

Kate: You like…?

Liam: Mm-hmm, I like them a lot. I’m sorry that… someone like me likes you so much.

Kate: That’s—

Liam: But, I’m sorry— I love you.

Liam: Even though I still don’t really know what love is, I love you.

The passionate look in his gaze mercilessly caused my heart to stir.

(I’ve always wanted to be there by Liam’s side when he would someday reach out for something he wants for himself.)

(I’ve imagined how happy I would be to witness that.)

What Liam was giving me at that very moment was once nothing more than a dream I couldn't reach.

I wanted to reach my hands out to receive it, but—

— His hands touched mine first.

(... Liam?)

Liam’s trembling fingers gently came into contact with my fingertips, then my knuckles, and then he held my hand tightly with his that was larger than mine.

Liam: … Ahh, I’ve always wanted to be the one to reach out to you first like this…

Liam: From tomorrow onwards, I want to spend my life holding your hand. Therefore…

Liam: Will you wait for me? I’ll definitely catch up to you…

Liam: I’ll reach you before anyone else can. I’m a fast runner, you know?

I didn’t want to cry, but my tears welled up in my eyes and trickled down my cheeks.

But I wiped them away with my hand and smiled at Liam, not wanting to worry him.

Kate: Liam, I’m not leaving.

Liam: Huh?

Kate: I was just discussing with Victor about letting me remain in Crown as a fairytale writer.

– Flashback Start –

Victor: I received your report for the past one month. … However, it seems that the last page is missing.

Kate: I couldn't bring myself to put a period on the story. Therefore, I have a favour to ask of you.

Kate: Can you consider allowing me to stay here as a fairytale writer?

Victor: I wanted to ask you for the reason but— it was already written in your report.

Victor: Miss Kate. I have a favour to ask of you as well. Because you have been supporting Crown and keeping our secret…

Victor: Her Majesty and I both wish for you to continue being our fairytale writer. … Will you accept this offer?

Kate: Yes, of course. I humbly accept your offer.

– Flashback End –

Liam: … So that means you’ll be staying here as a fairytale writer from now on?

Kate: … Yes.

Liam: I… I see.

Liam: I jumped to conclusions too quickly… this is embarrassing.

Liam: I’m always… embarrassing myself in front of you.

It made me so happy to see the look of relief on his face, I hid the fact that I was about to cry again by talking in a joking manner.

Kate: Will you let me continue writing stories about you, Liam?

Liam: … Yup, leave it to me.

I couldn't figure out why.

But my heart, body, and instincts craved Liam more than I thought I did.

…

We laid down on the white sheets together, kissing each other over and over again like we just couldn't get enough of each other.

Kate: Haah…

Every time we changed angles, the wet noises echoed through the room and elevated our desires.

(... I feel dizzy.)

Liam took off his jacket while kissing my neck, and was about to remove my blouse.

Liam: …

His hands stopped on my blouse, hesitating to remove it.

Kate: … Liam?

Liam: … What should I do? This is the first time I've wanted this…

Liam: If I divulge my desires, I’ll want even more…

Liam: And if I end up hurting you, I…

(He looks really worried, but I’m so happy right now that I feel like I could die from happiness…)

I gently combed my fingers through his soft rose coloured hair.

Kate: It’s alright. I don’t know any other man who's as gentle as you are. And…

Kate: I don’t mind if you hurt or dirty me.

Liam: … K… Kate…

Kate: So… please tell me what it is that you want…

Liam hugged me and put his lips to my ear.

Liam: … I want to hold you, I want to be inside you, I want our bodies to become one. Let me hold you, Kate…

His voice sounded sweet like honey, making me feel a heat building up inside the pit of my stomach.

Instead of nodding in response, I kissed him again and our tongues danced together.

As we let ourselves get absorbed into the kiss, he removed my blouse and slid his tongue over my bare chest.

Kate: Aahh…

Liam: … Ahaha, you look lovely when you’re feeling good. Then I’ll make you feel good even more, and more, and more.

Liam positioned himself between my legs and spread them open.

(... Eh?)

He flashed me a bewitching smile before proceeding to kiss my wet spot—

Kate: aah… nnn…

Liam: No, Kate. Don’t resist. Mm, how about over here…?

I arched my back each time he sucked and licked my sensitive spot, I felt like my back was going to break.

My body was filled with the sweet feeling of pleasure, making me involuntarily grab the sheets underneath me tightly.

(The sounds I’m making are so indecent.)

Kate: N-Not there… Liam

Liam: Really? I’ll listen if you tell me “wait”.

Liam: I’ve said it before, I… I don’t want to hurt you.

Liam: So please tell me what you “really” want…

Liam’s penetrating gaze was lustful, like a cat filled with unsatisfied desires.

It was like he could see through my shameful desires.

(... It’s not fair with how he’s looking at me.)

(It’s making me want him even more.)

Kate: … Don’t stop… even if… I tell you to.

Liam: … You’re so cute. I like the sound of that.

Liam: I’m not going to stop anymore. … I’m going to make you feel so good.

Kate: Eh… ahh…

Liam continued pleasuring me with his fingers and tongue.

When my body felt like it had melted, Liam entered me with a hot sigh.

Liam: … Nngh, haah…

Liam: … Sorry… Kate. I…

Liam: For some reason, I’m going to cry again…

Kate: … Mm, me too.

Liam captivated both my body and soul, he was all I could see.

(... I’ll give you my everything.)

Kate: Don’t hold back when it comes to how much you want me. My body, heart, and my future days… I’ll give you all of it.

Liam: … Haha, stop trying to make me cry more, Kate.

Kate: … It’s okay to cry.

Liam: … No, I want to make love to you. This isn't the time for me to be crying.

We indulged in each other’s warmth, as if to confirm that we were both there.

My star named Liam was really right there in my arms.

[uravityxo]

hello friends,, i just coming here to say smth !! im feeling a bit anxious rn about everything and i wanted to say some stuff and then add some of it to my pinned post too :3,, putting this below cut as its a bit negative !! so warning for that <3

first thing ; i am autistic and have adhd,, i find social cues a bit confusing and sometimes i just miss them,, i can also misread things or interpret them the wrong way !! i am also a very enthusiatic rp partner <33 i like to talk lots and i message people i think are happy with me and dont mind my rambles !! however ,, if ive ever got the vibes wrong and my messages are TOO MUCH - please, please, please let me know,, i never want to bother anyone or anything !!! i am just a super happy gal who likes to yap yap yap away. if i ever say anything that upsets you or anything, let me know! its never my intention to hurt anyone, i can just be a bit silly sometimes,, !! sometimes i just need brutal (or maybe polite) honesty !!

second thing ; i am overwhelmed right now by what to do on this blog, i know i've made lots of posts and i know this is for fun ,, but theres so much in my drafts i am struggling to even write as i see the number in my drafts and shut down :(( i am trying though ( i really am!) !! today is izukus birthday so im going to focus on writing that stuff today,, but yea,, i am really struggling to deal with stuff </3 so im sorry i am posting one reply every few days,, i wish i could do more !! but yes,, anyways !!

third thing ; i can be a bit forgetful!! when it comes to blog rules, interactions and dnis and stuff,, so if i ever mess up a rule or get something wrong i apologise SO much !! i wanna get things right and i do check rules often for blogs to remind myself but i may slip up and that stresses me sometimes :((

fourth thing (sorta) ; please let me know when i fuck up!! im just a lil dude trying to get by in life,, i just like having friends and stuff but sometimes i do wrong !! and whilst it isnt intentional its still smth which is important to apologise about and talk it through !! if i ever do you wrong ,, just know your feelings are valid and its okay to be mad and get angry at me !! just let me know what i did so i can improve on things in the future <33 :3

[le-sserafims-blog]

🌸 Thankfully, I was able to spend my birthday meaningfully, so came here late 😭😭

Once again, thank you so much for congratulating me on my birthday, FEARNOT 🥹🥹🥹🥹🩷

Wow!!!

I'm 26 years old!!!

I've already been an idol for half my life!! 🤔 LOL

Very surprising...

It's amazing... When I first started as an idol, I never imagined what the future brings. I always thought life was unpredictable, but I've been able to continue this far because of the people around me who always support me. I'm so grateful for that :)

When I was young, my birthday was a happy day when I could receive gifts and eat what I liked. It was a day when I felt like the arrow was pointing towards me, so I always eagerly waited for my birthday feeling excited.

After turning 20, I started to feel a bit anxious about birthdays... 😅

Honestly, I felt a little scared that my time as an idol was getting shorter...lol

And recently, especially this birthday, it became a birthday with a slightly different meaning for me.

I realized that birthdays are not only about receiving congratulatory greetings, but also about being able to express gratitude to the people around me.

It's a bit embarrassing, but for the first time in my life (excluding my school days), I wrote letters to each my family members and gave them as gifts for my birthday this year!

I felt grateful knowing that my family was preparing gifts because we could spend my birthday together with them after a long time. I wanted to express my gratitude to them as well.

As I wrote about how grateful I am for giving birth to me and raising me for 26 years, many emotions have overwhelmed me, so I was writing the letters while holding back tears... 😅

And seeing my parents shedding tears while reading the letters that i gave, I felt a mix of emotions.

At a young age, they've been worried endlessly about their daughter entering this world, living far away where she isn't within easy reach, likely feeling lonely... I felt sorry, but still, seeing my parents shedding tears while sincerely supporting my dreams made me think this way.

Latelt, I've actually been feeling that there would come a time when the effort I keep putting in for myself will reach its limit— like the effort, if it's all just for myself, might exhaust me, reaching some sort of emotional limit. But seeing my parents, I started to feel that maybe working hard for someone else could be another way.

If I think that all my efforts are for myself only, I feel like I might lose strength when I detach from that passion, and it would be even harder when results don't come. But when I think about supporting my parents who sincerely cheer me on, and for FEARNOTs who support me as passionately, and for the members and staff who share the same dream, strangely, I feel energized.

These are just my thoughts, but I believe that to be able to continue something for a long time, perhaps this kind of mindset is also necessary :)

I received so much love from many people on my birthday this year. It made me truly happy to realize that there are so many FEARNOTs around the world celebrating my birthday and supporting me.

The online world continues expanding and may not always spread positivity every day, but I'm still grateful for the internet because it allows me to know that there are people who like me and celebrate my birthday. 😊

I remember my mom saying once on my birthday, "I hope you become an idol who, just like your name which holds the meaning "may good things bloom," receive congratulations from many people.' Following my mom's wish, I was able to become an idol who is indeed loved by many people.

I have experienced many failures and I'm learning various things as a person, but I've come to think that I'm happy with who I am now. Everyone has imperfections and areas where they are still immature, but I believe that's how we can continue to grow.

Im still in the process of learning a lot about myself, and every day, I strive to be a better version of myself than I was yesterday, continuing to reflect and improve along the way.

The world may sometimes be noisy with negativity, but I still believe that there are many happy, positive, joyful, and precious things in this world. Despite its flaws, I still find this world beautiful.

It's not all good, but it's not all bad either.

I wish to be the kind of person in your life who brings even a little bit of positivity and goodness. :)

Thank you for celebrating my 26th birthday with me, and please continue to support me in the future as well. ☺️

[phiclets]

loud heart WORD COUNT: 1500 | RATING: T

summary: the orange heart reply was a cultural moment; this is my vision of what might have led up to dan posting it.

a/n: i posted this on AO3 a couple days ago, but had to wait till tumblr verified i wasn't a robot to crosspost here. from now on all my fics will be available in both places!

ALSO ON AO3

-

Dan knew what the response to We're All Doomed (now uploaded onto Youtube, forever) was going to be, even before he started scrolling through the comments and the tweets. He'd been doing the show long enough. Yet still, knowing it didn't prepare him for it emotionally. The kindness of people was overwhelming; the gratitude even more so.

He flits between social media platforms on his phone, reading the reviews and battling unsuccessfully against the growing lump in his throat, even as a recorded version of his voice says, "Anyone here planning on becoming a polyamorous lesbian grandma?" from the TV. Phil put the special on earlier — very proudly accessing it from the YouTube TV app, which made Dan smile — and they're letting it play in the background as they sit with their respective phones, having seen the show too many times already to totally invest in it again. But it's nice. Comforting.

Raucous cheers erupt from the sea of future polyamorous lesbian grandmas in the audience, and Dan glances up at the TV with a smile. He loves this part. He loved that audience, both nights—and the wider group of people that they represented. "Nice," he says onscreen, which elicits some laughter.

A bright little ding! drags his attention back to his phone.

New tweet from Phil Lester.

It's natural for him to glance over to the man himself, curled up just an arm's length away from him. Phil is fiddling serenely with his phone, but looks up when he feels Dan staring. When Dan raises an eyebrow, Phil only responds with a shrug, smiling.

Dan obediently opens the tweet to see for himself.

every time i see this it makes me laugh and cry at the same time until i'm a shaking mess on the floor. great show thanks danny!!

Phil has quoted Dan's original announcement tweet, so the endorsement sits on top of Dan's name, glowing with pride. A few things happen at once in Dan then. First, there's the impulse to snort at the nickname danny, which is Phil being silly (and succeeding at it, as he always does). Then there's the warmth that suffuses his entire chest from Phil Lester openly expressing his emotions for Dan's sake on a public platform, an occurrence so rare it still shocks (and essentially assaults) Dan whenever it happens. Then, from that warmth, comes the immediate, overwhelming, not so inexplicable urge to sob his lungs out.

"Fuck," he whispers, so quietly it's only a breath, and quickly smothers it in the sleeve of his jumper, turning away from Phil's side of the sofa.

Because it's all so familiar. Because he's been here before—so many times. Reeling from the adrenaline of releasing a project he poured his heart and soul—or at the very least, a lot of his time—into. Anxious about and then overjoyed by the response to it. But no matter what it was, whether Basically I'm Gay, or Why I Quit YouTube, or fuck, even Hello Internet—

Phil has been there.

Phil is always there. Always here—he thinks, looking over at him finally—next to him. In his life. (Hadn't he said that to everyone on the internet before? Hadn't he thought it was so cheesy back then, and yet regretted nothing, because there hadn't been a single lie in what he'd said?) Phil sits in ignorant bliss on the other end of the sofa, tucked up against the armrest, tapping at something on his phone. His hair is turning more ginger by the day. His face has faint lines in it that Dan has seen appear, firsthand and little by little, over the past decade and a half. His emoji pyjama pants are a hate crime on fashion.

He's everything. He's there.

"Dan."

Dan comes back to himself, and he realises Phil is looking at him now, questions displayed openly on his face. Dan can't really read any of them, though—the fucking oceans of saltwater that have built up in his eyes are doing a brilliant job of preventing that. He shakes his head, and Phil's face sinks further into concern rather than confusion, and Dan shakes his head again to tell him no, it's not bad. It can never be bad when it's you.

Instead all he manages to say, now half nodding and shaking his head—it's a mess—is, "I love you."

He's never meant it more. He's always meant it just as much as now. He thinks he'll never really know, even in himself, what that word really means or where the limits lie—if there are any. What he does know is that he's going to spend the rest of his life growing to fit every bit of it he can. Phil takes his hand where it rests on the sofa between them, and Dan knows there was never any two ways about it.

"Yeah," Phil says. He's so solid. (So there. Always.) He looks Dan in the eyes, shakes his hand back and forth. "I love you."

The first spill of tears warms Dan's cheeks. He nods, looking down at their hands, then back up at Phil. He knows his mouth is doing something funny, squeezed up tight like he's just bit into a lemon, and there are tears already seeping in through the corners, and by the time he barely breathes out a, "Thank you," he's already diving into Phil, grabbing him up into a messy, breath-robbing hug. He can hear it in Phil's little gasp. But there's not a moment of hesitation between that and the feeling of Phil's arms wrapping around him, tight as ever. Assuring as ever.

"Thank you," Dan says again. And he hopes Phil knows he means for everything. For seeing him in the replies of his tweets in 2009, and for responding. For urging him to post the worst video Dan would ever make, which would confusingly also be his best one, because it would be the one that started it all. For having so much fun with him and helping him build a career out of it. For supporting him (15 years' worth of "great show thanks danny!" variations). For believing in him. For loving him, really, most of all.

Phil pushes his cheek into the top of Dan's head, and smooths his hand over Dan's hair again and again, and says, "Always."

Yeah, he understood.

-

By the time Dan has collected himself, enough time has passed that it would be embarrassing if he had even a shred of embarrassment left to show around Phil Lester, but he thinks that died somewhere around the decade mark.

They're still all caught up in each other, more one human than two, a blanket monster that's made its home against the tiniest corner of a perfectly sizeable sofa. We're All Doomed is well into its final quarter on the TV now, and they're sort of staring past it into the wall and the world and the future beyond. Phil's fingers are still in Dan's hair; which is just the way he wants to keep it.

Except that's when Dan remembers the thing that started his descent into incomprehension in the first place, and he briefly—with enough warning to Phil—sits up to get his phone from his previous spot on the sofa. He settles back into Phil with it in hand, so Phil has a clear view of the screen over his shoulder, and pulls up the tweet again. He scrolls down and taps on the waiting reply line, then stops.

How to say everything he just said to Phil, verbally and otherwise? (Mostly otherwise, let's be honest.) The task seems insurmountable. There aren't enough words in the dictionary, or hours in the day to use them. He can feel Phil's quiet expectance over his shoulder, steady but not applying any pressure. He'll wait for Dan as long as he needs him too.

But it doesn't take long. Because hey, Dan may be a self-professed yapper extraordinaire, but even he knows when the game is up. In this case there's just no use.

He pulls up the list of emojis, and taps on one.

Just one.

Then he waits, holding the phone just there, letting Phil see it and understand that that's it. All he wants to say. (Maybe all he's ever trying to say, to Phil.)

It's a heart.

(Orange, of course, because it's still about WAD.)

But just a heart.

Dan twists his head against Phil's shoulder to look up at him. "What d'you think?"

Phil is still looking ahead at the screen, and Dan watches the microscopic changes in expression on his face, from the softening of his wide eyes to the way his mouth gently relaxes into a smile. He looks down at Dan—Dan thinks, beautiful, mine—and says, "Yeah." Dan feels Phil's arm squeeze him around his stomach. "Do it."

So he does.

[blackcatreadstarot]

Ana De Armas Future Spouse Tarot Reading

Does Ana De Armas have a FS? Will she be married in the future? knight of cups + knight of wands reversed + the devil reversed (10 of cups as a clarification card) yes Did she meet her FS? ace of cups + 9 of wands reversed + 4 of cups reversed (10 of cups as a clarification card) yes What cards can tell about Ana's FS? the high priestess + queen of swords reversed + 8 of swords reversed: it's definitely a peson with a good intuition, might be into things like astrology or tarot. This person takes things too close to their heart and can be pessimistic, bitter and cold hearted. Her FS is mature and has sense of responsibility, FS is brave person and able to look fear in the eyes. 3 of pentacles reversed + 2 of pentacles reversed + 6 of wands: FS is also not a team player and puts a lot of things on their shoulders that leads them to feel overwhelmed and disorganized and having hard time handling lots of things at once. FS is kind of "if you want to do something good, do it yourself" person. Yet they are successful at what they do, they have recognition in their field. 6 of wands can be also an indicator of a famous person. 7 of swords reversed + 8 of swords reversed + queen of swords reversed + 6 of cups reversed + page of wands + king of wands: so this person will go through a very serious transformation: FS is manipulative, a liar, overly critical, pessimistic and bitter. But they will face truth about themselves, they will be not proud of themselves, so they will learn from past mistakes and move forvard, FS will go through a renewal of conscience. Maybe that person will go to a therapy to solve their inner problems. They will be a completely new person: mature, yet young at heart, active, optimistic, full of energy, a leader, who takes control of their life, motivated and confident. 8 of pentacles + 3 of swords reversed + 2 of swords reversed + 8 of wands reversed + king of cups reversed + 6 of pentacles: a lot of cards in this reading are talking about overcoming past, transformation and healing. This person works hard on overcome negative past events, heartache, sorrow, depression. There were a moment in life when FS felt trapped, anxious, stressed and had problems with their emotions. It was definitely a rough patch in their life. With the 6 of pentacles I feel that this person will be either very open about their journey of transformation and experience or will help others who is in situation like he is. How did they meet? 9 of cups + 7 of cups + 8 of swords + 5 of cups (I asked for clarification cards and all these cards came out of the deck: queen of cups + justice + the devil reversed + the wheel of fortune reversed + the magician + 9 of wands + 5 of wands + queen of pentacles reversed + strength + knight of pentacles + 10 of pentacles reversed + 3 of swords): very long story short: I feel that Ana and her FS already had some romantic history, maybe they didn't date, but romantic feelings definetely were involved. I think when they met they were just having fun. And Ana was in a center of attention, her FS was one of several people who wanted to date her. But, unfortunately, it was bad timing for anything romantic between them. One of them was battling some negative patterns, poor habits or addictions trying to break free. There are several cards that indicate fighting, overcoming struggles, breaking free. And I think it reffers to her FS. In the reading above I saw that her FS is going through inner transformation and doing serious shadow work. But at that time there were some jelousy and insecurity in the air between them. One of them thought that the other is not "good enough". Maybe some of the family members were not happy and supportive about possible pairing. All that led to a heartbreak and they are not currently together. But with the 5 of cups at the end, one of them or both of them are very sorry about how things went between them.

[frostfall-matches]

[ matchmaking... ]

@chloiyoomi : [ match report ready ]

your match is…

✦ Yaku Morisuke

-> [ Yaku is someone who is (generally) mature and calm; a good balance to your anxious nature. ] He is more than willing and able to be your rock when things get tough, and he’s so sweet about it, too. Life is tough, especially for folks prone to anxiety and overthinking - but even resilient people have days where they struggle. While Yaku can’t exactly relate to many of your troubles, he can absolutely sympathize and empathize. For him, it’s only natural to try and help his friends and partner overcome whatever they may be struggling with, whether it be in the short or long run. That said, he does tend to be solution oriented - if you’re wanting to just vent, please let him know or he’ll default to coming up with things to help ease your worries.

-> [ He isn’t exactly a bubbly social butterfly, but he’s social enough that it smooths out your initial interactions. ] Yaku is able to comfortably interact with many different types; he doesn’t come off as extremely introverted or extraverted, putting him in a comfortable middle ground for most. So, thankfully, you being socially awkward really isn’t going to hinder much when it comes to him. But it seems that you fare better in one-on-one situations, not as overwhelmed as you tend to be in group settings. He’s quick to pick up on that and is happy to devote some time to getting to know you - especially once he starts developing a crush on you. And learning that you actually love to yap is so amusing to him (in a good way!). He loves hearing what you have to say.

-> [ He would really value your compassion and desire to help others. ] Oftentimes, he falls into the role of the supportive upperclassman himself, naturally guiding or assisting those in his vicinity. If he’s in the position to help, then he will help! So knowing that compassion is such a core part of your identity and the way you approach the world and those around you is a huge point of attraction for him. You’re so incredibly sweet and charming in his eyes! And, sure, he may have a bit of a temper himself, but being kind to people is such a simple thing to do, and it shows that you’re mature enough to be considerate of other people. It’s a big draw to him when it comes to relationships, because he knows you’ll have each other’s backs.

-> [ It’s no problem if you’re not very comfortable with confrontation - Yaku will gladly step in when need be. ] At least you make a solid attempt to deal with confrontation when necessary, even when you hate it; he respects that a lot! It’s funny, though - he honestly does try and let you fight your own battles because he doesn’t want to disrespect your autonomy, but damn if he doesn’t have the urge to step in right away. He will absolutely get heated on your behalf, especially if the conflict involves someone who is disrespecting you. But, to his credit, in many (but not all) cases, he will hold himself back until you either went to him for help or it seemed like you were in dire need of assistance.

-> [ Cat-loving couple! ] If you have cats, he must befriend them. He’s coming over to your place as often as you’ll let him - mostly for the cat… but you, too (he’s kidding–). Yaku is really fond of cats and he definitely wants to have one (or several) in the future himself once things settle down a bit in terms of school and professional volleyball. Chances are you’re absolutely down to take in a few cats with him. He definitely treats them as your shared children, and tends to fluctuate from absolutely spoiling them to sternly (but endearingly) scolding them if they get up to too much mischief.

-> [ Low-key and relaxed dates seem to be your thing, and that works well for Yaku. ] He would absolutely be down with hitting up a place for milkshakes on the way home from school and practice, spending the hours chatting and indulging in your presence until the sun starts to set low on the horizon. And he’s the type to walk you home, even if it isn’t quite dark out yet. Given the fact that he likes going into the mountains in the summer, he might really like camping with you. A trip that is at once both relaxing and adventurous, breaking the monotony but still allowing room for comfort.

-> [ He is definitely someone who puts a lot of emphasis on quality time in relationships. ] All other love languages aside, spending time with you is so important to him and it allows him to really show his affection for you in a myriad of ways. Side note: although he tries to be brave and mature about it, long distance would be a struggle for Yaku. He can send as many sweet messages as he wants and have long phone calls with you, but it’s nothing compared to being with you, seeing your face when he gives you a sickeningly sweet compliment and a tight hug to top it all off.

-> [ The type to become absolutely smitten and lovesick, even when he tries to play it cool. ] Yaku gets teased about it by his teammates quite often - and yes, they are subsequently often on the receiving end of his ire due to this. Any time you do something he considers even remotely cute, he’s melting and malfunctioning on the inside. Any sweet or supportive messages has him grinning and blushing; gifts you give him are kept safe and proudly displayed; he melts into any sort of touch you give him. He doesn’t even realize how much his bold and steady exterior softens up around you!

[hollygl125]

On rabbit holes and fanfic (in my own life):

*This is a note I wrote for AO3/FFN, but I’ve been meaning for a while to write a post on how I—a member of the Oregon Trail generation—wound up signing up for Tumblr in January 2022, and this kind of hints at that, so I thought I might as well share it here, too.*

What follows is a TMI note on why I can’t make any promises on when the next chapter of this story will be up; please read or don’t, as pleases you.  I would like to state first, though, what I also state at the bottom of this note: thank you so, so, so very much for reading; your kind support means more than I can tell you.

So, I’m, ah… not very good at all this.

Two years ago now, as I was doing a “CSI as love story” rewatch and falling far, far, far down the GSR rabbit hole, I was also falling deep into ADHD burnout and overwhelming anxiety (without, at the time, realizing that I had either ADHD or a lifetime of anxiety).  By the time spring 2022 rolled around, I was lacking executive functioning abilities for even basic tasks, while my mind sought solace or dopamine or whatever it was with—you guessed it—these two lovely science nerds.

I read hundreds and hundreds of GSR fics, without managing to leave a single, solitary comment/review.  (I wanted to comment!  I couldn’t!  I’m not saying commenting would have killed me, but I just couldn’t do it; I wouldn’t have been able to continue reading if it were required, and obsessing over these two science nerds was basically all my mind could handle.  So when I tell you that I get that commenting can be too much sometimes, I get it.  I should also note my eternal gratitude to all the amazing GSR fic writers who—unknowingly—helped me during this time.)

I occasionally questioned whether I might try writing something about these science nerds, but I always dismissed that pretty quickly.  I’d never willingly undertaken a creative writing project in my life (unless you count my last dog’s Instagram).  For added context, until 2022, I had last (and first, for that matter) previously read fan fiction in the mid-2000s, when my favourites on The West Wing were taking their own sweet time.  So in January 2022, while desperate for more GSR content, I was like, “Is fanfic still a thing?  Is there GSR fanfic?”  I literally started by googling “GSR fan fiction.”  I’d never even heard of AO3 or FFN; I think the fic for The West Wing had been on Yahoo! Groups.

But I had all these romantic scenarios and headcanons and such constantly running through my head, and I was getting tired of having to recreate the dialogue for them every night as I fell asleep.  So eventually, in late June 2022, I thought maybe I should try writing something down—at some point in the future, once I’d had more time to prepare.  Naturally the next day my brain was like, no, now, now, we’re doing this now.  I had no conscious say in the matter.  I wasn’t sure whether I was going to post anything, but apparently I was going to write it.

I had a lot of fun writing out so many of my thoughts and feeling and hopes and dreams for our two lovely science nerds, and pretty soon I had a draft for this series of stories (although it was only a fraction of what I have now written).  I started posting the first story in September 2022.  Luckily I got to participate in a (also luckily, not very mentally taxing) overseas professional placement for several months at the end of 2022, and this was a welcome distraction from *everything else* about my life.

When I got home in winter 2023, the anxiety returned in full force.  I got an ADHD diagnosis, but neither that nor the anxiety are effectively managed yet.  And, truth be told, posting these stories gives me a lot of anxiety.  It’s sort of been a weekly cycle of posting, feeling very anxious about it for several days, talking myself back to a place of peace, getting ready to post again, posting again, rinse, repeat.  Sometimes I’ve found myself feeling too anxious to post, and the chapter/story in question has been pushed back by a week.

So I wasn’t exactly feeling great about the posting process, but I was still determined to proceed.  I had a posting schedule that would have seen me finish posting this story by the end of November (last month) then post the remaining four shorter stories over the next couple months.  (A few of them are synced to dates/times of year: the winter holidays and February, i.e., the anniversary of the AAFS conference.) But then, with the last chapter I posted, I was just too anxious/unhappy.  This may have been because I’d slightly accelerated my posting schedule and hadn’t left myself enough time to process everything; I’m not sure.  But I found myself looking at Tumblr gifs of our two lovely science nerds and feeling sad and resentful, not happy, and I realized that, if I continued on as I was doing at the time, I was going to destroy both my deep love of the characters and my own happy place.

So I told myself that I didn’t have to keep posting now—that, as much as I was determined to have the complete series of stories posted, I could do it in months or in a year or some other time when no one was left to read it; honestly, that thought made me feel a lot better.  But then I decided maybe I didn’t have to wait quite so long—that I could try posting once per month or something like that.  On the upside, I tell myself, this should also leave time for me to respond to comments more promptly and to go engage with other writers’ stories.  (I managed to go back and read and comment on a handful of stories this summer.  Commenting still gives me a lot of anxiety; at one point I felt like I almost gave myself a panic attack.  But I’m going to try to work at it.)  As of this morning, I have responded to all comments on these stories, including to comments by guests/people who aren’t logged in (unless I thought the comment was from a bot!).

I can’t promise when the next chapter will be posted.  My goal is for next month, but it really depends on how I feel after posting this one and how I feel next month.  I do hope you’ll come back to read it, though!

If you’ve read this far—both in this series and in this note—thank you so very much!  You certainly didn’t need to know all the information in this note, but I needed to share it, if you get what I mean.

Thank you so, so, so very much for reading and for your kind kudos, comments, follows, faves, and reviews.  Supportive comments/reviews always, always, always make my day.  Your support for this series of stories is truly what has allowed me to get even this far in posting these stories, and I appreciate it all more than I can tell you. 💛💛💛

[ninapi]

○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●

Save me (Ushijima Version)

Premise: Ushijima struggles to understand the concept of love and what is expected of him in said equation, but he finds himself in the predicament of wanting nothing more than to be with the woman he loves even if it gets in the way of his established lifestyle.

Word Count: 3173

Chapter 5: Love letter.

Being a teen isn’t the easiest thing there is. Your body changes, your mood does too, constantly. It’s a journey of self-discovery where you learn who you truly are and what you want to do with the rest of your life. It’s a moment in life when you experience a lot of first times, a moment to learn from your mistakes and grow.

For Ushijima it was the moment he first experienced not just love, but a whole new array of emotions.

Being sad, angry, anxious, happy, excited, they were all so different, and when majority of people experience them all while growing up slowly, one at a time preparing them for later in life, he got to experience them all at once in a matter of just a couple of months.

His mother was present, but active parenting wasn’t her thing. Not having his dad around also didn’t help young Ushijima to develop a sense of understanding for human nature, it wasn’t until you arrived in his life that he had to learn how to deal with raw emotions, and that could be really overwhelming for someone who doesn’t have a strong support network.

But he had you now.

You’ve been his girlfriend for the last three months and he wouldn’t tell anyone otherwise, he was a happy man.

He had a bright future ahead, the pro-league already waiting for him to graduate to welcome him with their arms open, his last year of school was his best in academic records for him and he met the love of his life. He honestly never thought he’d go through such a thing. Love was a foreign concept for him, always shown in media but always so far from reality, almost like a myth. So, when he sees himself now, smiling like a fool hearing you blabbing about cake ingredients and cooking instructions in the phone, he thinks he possibly reached that farfetched reality.

“Let me know if you need me to go buy some ointment, I can drop by your dorm.” It was very late at night, you weren’t even supposed to be in the kitchen at this time, but you wanted to try this new recipe you found online and share it with your boyfriend, he was always excited to eat new things. “I just bumped my pinky in the oven, Toshi. I’ll be fine.” these are the things that make you believe fairy tales might be real, maybe prince charming was a bit fake, but there are men out there that do deserve such a title. “Alright, I’ll kiss it better tomorrow then.”

You thought it would take longer for him to grasp the concept of being in a relationship, and it was a bit rough at the beginning, the manhandling was still present, he’s just too big and managing his own strength can be a task, but he’s been working on it diligently and his touch was gentler now a days. His kissing had also improved, a lot. Him figuring out it was easier than talking, gave a sudden turn to the relationship. He still doesn’t know when to stop and has been having to deal with the biggest problem for teen boys there is, their hormones.

It was quite a surprise, having him pull you onto his lap, groan into the heavy kiss. He didn’t quite understand what his body was craving with intensity, but you weren’t making things easier for him in the slightest. The way you looked at him, breathless, your eyes quietly asking for more.

Tendo on the other hand, knew exactly what he needed and after a very embarrassing conversation that took hours, he now knows about his body’s human preservation needs.

To be fair, only Tendo knows about this. He was still the same stoic captain kicking everyone’s asses in each game, thriving even more than usual in his element. The rest of the team knew you were officially a thing now, but that was it. He was softer with everyone, his own steps became lighter as days went by. You would make lunch for the both of you and would always eat together. Nobody dared to interrupt the little piece of heaven you created on a lone hill at the back of the school, even if they all knew about it.

For you, nothing had really changed, but you were in a good mood all the time and even started liking Shirabu, at least a little bit. You got to work in a school project together and after falling asleep on the library mocking each other for an entire afternoon you are now in good terms, you have his phone number and all.

Bonding became a thing for you and his team, Goshiki started calling you ‘nee-san’ and was more like a puppy trailing after you every time he saw you. His goal was to be like Ushijima, so at first all he wanted from you was to learn more about him to understand him a bit better, but ended up being even more sure that his goal was to be like him, maybe one day he would meet someone as wonderful as you to guide him through his career and support him the way you do.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Your second year of high school wrapped up successfully. You were top of your class, your boyfriend graduated with honors and will be forever in the hall of fame for Shiratorizawa. You made so many friends and memories to treasure for the rest of your life, it was a well spent year.

Though it was hard saying your good-byes to Semi and Tendo, they both have been such an important part of your life, you would see Semi around, but your feisty friend would be chasing his dream, leaving all behind to go to Paris. It was harder on Ushijima that he thought it would, he remembers thinking how he’s never missed Tendo, but that was just because he was always there. Truth is, without Tendo in his life things wouldn’t have been the way they are now. He was a wonderful friend. His best friend. And saying goodbye to the people you love is hard.

“Wakatoshi-kun, are you crying?” he wiggled his eyebrows teasingly, poking the side of his hard rock abs, “Dust got in my eye.” that made your messy sobbing self chuckle, “We’ll miss you. Make sure to call us often. I don’t know if I can handle Toshi by myself.” Tendo gathered you in his arms, rubbing your back, he never thought the loud angsty girl that was snooping around the gym that spring afternoon would become such an important part of his life. You were his best friend’s girl, but you were also so much more, the only female friendship he’s been able to maintain this long, the only girl who accepted him for what he was, fully. You were caring and understanding, he was glad you would be there for his friend, otherwise he wouldn’t be able to leave and follow his dreams with ease. “I will. Take care of the big guy for me, ok? Give yourself some credit, you’re fabulous. Don’t miss me too much or I will have to come back.” you pulled your man into the hug, laughing together. This would be the last time in a while that the three of you would share the same space.

After seeing Tendo off in the airport, Ushijima, who now had a car, given to him by his sponsors, drove you back to the school. He would have to confront adulthood on his own for a while, but he was confident everything would be just fine. You still had a year to go, and he wanted to take this time away to do some personal growth. He was used to the intense practicing hours and the extremely high expectations of the people behind his future, it was just a new environment, a new team. He would even be able to still see known faces soon as they start to prepare for the Olympics. His career was already set for him, all he had to do was continue living the life he normally lives. But what about you? He had so many questions, he was still unsure of how to move on in a relationship, he was certain he wanted you in his life for as long as it was possible and has done his fair share of research, but your thoughts were still unknown to him.

He stopped along the way, a nice restaurant was advertising your favorite and he just had to take you there, it was a good moment to talk about the future, he thought. Having seen Tendo leave just now made his resolution much stronger, if seeing him go was this hard, he doesn’t want to even imagine what seeing you go would feel like.

“Toshi, this is delicious! I’m so glad we stopped here. It’s a shame we can’t bring Tendo with us another time, I’m sure he would have loved it…” you were about to start crying again so he reached over for your hand, contemplating life for a moment.

“My love.” his tone was so soft, it was almost like a breathless whisper, “Would it be ok for me to hope of a future where you are by my side until we grow old?” if you thought having cake for lunch was going to be the only thing making you cry, you were wrong, this man…seriously. ”If that’s what you want, I want it too.”  he pressed a kiss to the top of your head, getting closer to feed you some of the decadent treat. “That’s all I want.”

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Kageyama had been quiet ever since your last encounter. He had come to terms with the fact that your relationship with Ushijima seemed to be strong enough. It’s not the same a pre-teen relationship with no future than dealing with a very established one stepping into adulthood.

He respected Ushijima, not only as the fantastic player he was, but as a man. He made it one of his goals to be as good as him, to deserve being in the same team as the best player Japan’s future has to offer. And with this, came the acceptance he was looking for. If he was this great of a man, it made complete sense why you fell in love with him. He’s seen you two around a couple of times even if he didn’t tell you about it. There were times he would walk aimlessly, lost in thought, and would always end up in Shiratorizawa. Only a couple of times he did see you though, but you were always with Ushijima, he would hold you close, keep you warm, kiss your head with adoration. Even from his hiding place he could feel the amount of love both of you had for each other and he was ok with that, if it was a man deserving of your love then he would have to accept it and live with that.

He was young and didn’t understand what love was when it mattered the most. He might have lost the woman he loved, twice, but he would always have his best friend. The only person to ever love him truly, respect him, understand him. You were the most important person to him and even though gaining Ushijima’s respect was in the top of his list, getting you back as an active part of his life was just the most important of all.

“(Y/N), how’s life as a third year? Missing me much?” you could hear his smug grin on the other side of the line, it made you smile. “I’ve missed you every day, for the longest time. Life’s good. Ready to be an adult.”

Having his friendship back was the only thing missing in your life for it to be perfect. He had always been the most important person to you, knowing you broke his heart more than once still made you lose sleep. Wanting him back in your life might be a selfish wish, but you hoped he was willing to let you back in.

“I was thinking. Maybe we can hang out one of these days? You can bring your scary boyfriend if you want to, I don’t want things to be awkward.”

“Why can’t you be honest with yourself and tell me you wanna hang out with Japan’s best wing spiker? I can totally see through your bullshit, Tobio.” Laughing together felt good, the ice covering his heart was finally starting to melt. He would do his part, be there for you like he always did. If Ushijima ever hurt you, he would step in, that was his roll after all, but somehow, even if for him was a little discouraging, he didn’t think he would have to fulfill said roll ever again. He was pretty convinced this one would stick around, and he would be the one kicked if he wasn’t careful enough.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Ushijima has been a famous athlete for as long as he can remember. Even as a child, he would constantly bring medals and trophies home. But now that he was actually making a living out of it, stress was getting to him.

TV interviews, sports magazines, big events, those were things he would rarely have to face in the past and being the awkward guy he was, it became much of a nightmare. He wished you could be there for him always, that things could go back to how they were in school. Whenever he felt unsure or extremely tired, all he had to do was go down a flight of stairs and you’d be there to comfort him. But now, he has to wait for the weekend to come and that’s when he’s the busiest, so the time he gets to spend with you is too minimal for his taste.

Scrolling through his phone, he finds a bunch of notes he’s been taking on his research days. He’s been seriously trying to improve your relationship, he knows he can be a handful sometimes and doesn’t want to disappoint you in any way, he wanted to strengthen your bond, to make sure you knew he was yours to do as you pleased.

One note in particular got his attention.

He read an article about the most romantic actions to take to advance in a relationship, the number one rated being a letter. He has troubles speaking in general, writing a letter sounded like a terrible idea, but that just gave it most importance. It would take him out of his comfort zone, and he would finally be able to convey the thoughts that have been invading his being lately. He even stopped by a fancy stationary shop the other day to get a letter set, and something else he wanted to include in said letter. The time had come. He wanted to give it to you on your graduation and that was just a couple of days away.

•───────•°•❀•°•───────•

Seeing ‘your baby’ a.k.a Goshiki sobbing on your chest, smashing his drenched nose onto your lovely outfit, was probably your most treasured memory of the entire graduation ceremony. Mostly all the original volleyball team were now officially gone, he would have to take care of everything by himself, not even you would be there to help him now. It was heart wrenching for him to see you and Shirabu leave, but he’s had a good high school experience, he was sure he’d see you both often.

And just like that, the school days were over for you.

Your boyfriend was waiting for you, sitting on the hood of his car, holding an impossibly big flower arrangement. Your parents headed home first to give you some time alone with your other half, taking the flowers to safety.

“They’re beautiful, Toshi. Thank you.” the smile gracing your lips was otherworldly, he thought you’d be a sobbing mess as usual, but you didn’t cry today, not even once. You were more than ready to leave this place and continue with your life, even if you weren’t really sure about what you wanted to do next.

“I wrote you a letter. Here. But don’t read it yet, let’s go somewhere quieter first.” you just nodded, examining the envelope, it was heavier than you expected a letter to be, and it picked your interest. The entire ride was made up of you re-telling the conversations you had with Goshiki and Shirabu about the future of the club, there was still fondness in his heart for his young teammates, he wished he would see them again in the field one day, since majority of his generation decided against it.

You were honestly speechless when you realized where he was taking you to. You were now standing on sand, a place equally special to the both of you. “Oh my god, Toshi! I haven’t been here since the training camp! And to think the stars are even more beautiful tonight, unbelievable.” running around the beach, your heart felt so full, even reading the letter seemed like it would slice your heart in two.

“Come here.” he patted his lap, handing you his letter once you were comfortably sitting between his legs. He had pulled out the piece of paper from the envelope, keeping it to himself while you read it.

It was honestly quite short; you expected a novel by how heavy it was. “(Y/N), my love. Life is so hard when you aren’t by my side. Could I be so selfish to ask you to share your life with me permanently?” just a couple of sentences, but when you looked up at him, he was holding a very shimmery ring, waiting for your approval. That’s when it hit you. He was asking you to marry him in a very Ushijima-like way. Tears were now flowing from your beautiful eyes, nodding like a crazy person. He took your hand in his gently, sliding the ring down your finger at the same time as he captured your lips in a slow kiss that was spilling with adoration and immense love in both sides.

Your future had always been bright, you knew you’d do great things eventually. But it has never been as promising as tonight.

○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●○●○●○●○●●

Tagged babes: @dazaisfavgf, @lauraagrace, @san-emi

Previous Chapter Masterlist Next Chapter

[thewaywardbirdsnest]

Law had been a lot of things in his life.

Son. Brother. Orphan.

Pirate. Captain. Pack Alpha.

Surgeon of Death. Warlord of the Sea. Member of the Worst Generation.

Lover. Partner. Mate.

And now, if everything went according to plan, he would soon be adding one more label to that list:

Father.

It scared the hell out of him.

It was confusing, because he knew that he wanted this. He and Sanji had given themselves a couple years to think about it after bonding, with deep, intense, and emotional conversations punctuating long periods of introspection and speculation. Hell, it had been Law himself who had taken the first step towards more concrete decision-making.

He was excited and anxious and happy and terrified all at the same time, and for someone who tended to see the world in a very black-and-white way this cacophony of emotions was overwhelming to say the least.

He was bent over the sink splashing cold water on his face to try to clear his head when he felt a little tug from the bond that connected him and his mate. He looked up and met Sanji's gaze in the mirror, water still dripping from his chin and nose. Sanji was dressed in a pair of black drawstring shorts and one of Law's heavily-scented t-shirts, but even in his lounge clothes Sanji looked positively radiant. His face was slightly flushed from pre-heat, and his smile was calm and kind. Law fell in love all over again at the sight of him.

"You okay?" Sanji asked, joining him at the sink.

"Yes, just... getting my head on straight," Law assured him, wiping his face off with a towel.

"Nervous?" Sanji wrapped his arms around Law's waist and pulled him close to scent him.

Law felt some of the tension leave his body as Sanji's cardamom and ginger scent washed over him. "No," he lied.

"Bullshit," Sanji teased, ghosting a kiss over Law's bondmark. "If it makes you feel any better, I'm nervous too. It's kind of a big deal."

Law huffed out a laugh at the understatement. "Yeah, only kind of."

"Not having second thoughts, are you?" Sanji's question sounded like a teasing joke, but Law could feel the tiniest hint of fear across their bond. In response, he pushed out a wave of scent to calm him and nuzzled into his hair.

"Not at all," he promised.

Sanji tilted his chin up to peck Law on the lips before pulling out of the embrace. "I'm done in the kitchen. That was the last item on the checklist, so all that's left is to go get settled in the nest. You ready?"

"No," Law replied with a soft smile.

"Me either," Sanji agreed with a wink before extending a hand of invitation.

Law took it, letting himself be led out of the bathroom, down the hall, into the nest and onwards towards a beautiful future raising pups with the love of his life.