Twst Unveil Event Part 2
*In the Mirror Chamber*
*Yuurin, Jack, Ruggie, Malleus, Silver, Sebek, Rook, Epel, Floyd, and Jade are already there.*
Malleus: Seems that everyone is here.
Sebek: It's a pleasure for us to be in a trip with you, Waka-sama!
Malleus: Yes. Thanks to Yuurin who graciously invited me.
Yuurin: Don't mention it, Malleus-senpai.
Ruggie: Um, Rook? Is that a camera?
Rook: Oui!
Jack: Why?
Rook: To take photos of Monsieur Tranquille, of course!
Ruggie: ...
Ruggie: No, Rook. That's our job.
Jack: Yes. We need to update Leona-senpai every hour.
Epel: When did Leona-senpai become such a worrywart?
Floyd: Ne~ Ne~ Damselfish~ Are we going to have a sleepover~?
Yuurin: Yes. I believe so.
Floyd: You can share a bed with me and Jade~. You'll be our pillow~.
Silver: You can't.
Floyd: Eh~ Why not~?
Jade: Is there a problem, Silver?
Silver: Yuurin needs a good night's rest.
Jade: Ah, now that makes sense. *chuckles*
Floyd: Eh~? But I sleep like a baby lamb~.
Them except Yuurin: We all know that's a lie.
Yuurin: It's time for us to go.
Yuurin: We have arrived.
*The fresh breeze immediately welcomes them.*
Them: *sigh in contentment*
Jade: I like this place. *chuckles*
Silver: It feels like a good place to sleep in...
Sebek: Silver! Don't fall asleep!
Yuurin: I'm glad you find the place relaxing.
Yuurin: Though it's good while it lasts.
Jack: Hm? What do you mean by that, Yuurin?
Yuurin: Here she comes.
*The ground started shaking*
Epel: Eh— Are we having an earthquake?!
Yuurin: No.
"YUURIN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Them: Huh?
*A giant buff woman comes charging at them; or more likely towards Yuurin.*
Yuurin: Good morning, Philomela.
Them: That's... PHILOMELA?!!
Ruggie: Yuurin! Move aside!
Philomela: YUUURIN! *sweeps her off her feet and gives her a big, tight hug*
Philomela: Oh look at you!
Yuurin: How are you, Philomela?
Philomela: I am doing GREAT! *laughs*
Them: ...
Philomela: Oh. And these are your schoolmates, no?
Philomela: They look promising!
Them: *all of them smiles*
Yuurin: Philomela, can you put me down?
Philomela: Ah, yes, yes. Of course.
Floyd: Wow. She's as huge as a whale.
Epel: What the— Why would you say that?!
Philomela: A WHALE?!
Philomela: Did you hear that, Yuurin? He called me a whale!
Yuurin: Yes. I heard it loud and clear, Philomela.
Silver: She looks happy. Was that a compliment?
Yuurin: Yes. The best one at that.
The others: Oh...
Ruggie: *mutters* Wow. If it were in any other places...
Jack: *mutters too* You would have been slapped.
Philomela: Have a tour of the place while I assist the other schools.
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: Didn't you say no one wanted to participate?
Philomela: Well, after making an announcement that Night Raven College will join, different schools have shown their interests.
Yuurin: ...
Yuurin: I see. In that case, we will see you later.
Philomela: *takes her leave*
Floyd: So~ What should we do now~?
Malleus: I want to hear the beliefs and culture of this place.
Yuurin: There are tons of them.
Rook: Can you give us an example?
Yuurin: Hmm...
Yuurin: If you happen to lock eyes with an animal and it starts to approach you, run.
Epel: Huh? But why?
Jack: Is it because it's attacking you?
Yuurin: No. It means a god has taken a liking on you.
Them: ...
Rook: And why is that a problem, Monsieur Tranquille?
Yuurin: Kingdom of Heroes have records of wars and long-time disputes just for this very reason.
Ruggie: Yikes.
Floyd: Oh...
Floyd: There's a bald eagle staring at Guppy right now.
Epel: ...
Malleus: You are being liked by a god.
Yuurin: Oh. A bald eagle.
Yuurin: That's not good.
Epel: *panic noises*
*Later, Yuurin has to convince Epel that it was only a myth to stop him from crying*
Leona: How is everything there?
Yuurin: Not a problem so far.
Leona: Good. That's all I have to say. I'll hang up now. *ends the call*
Ruggie and Jack: ...
Ruggie: In 3... 2... 1...
Ruggie: *Leona is calling him*
Ruggie: *answers*
Leona: No sleeping in the same bed.
Ruggie: Yes, boss. Copy. *then Leona hangs up*
Jack: Aren't we sharing beds already?
Ruggie: Shh. You're going to attract the strict brother energy, Jack.
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UNHOLY ALLIANCE SPOILERS (again, I can’t stop yapping about this update):
Either I’m the slowest person alive, or I just think too much (though it’s fun to do so). BASICALLY I was just playing my game and thought over the Bishop’s final quest until I realized all of their dialogue had a connection to their injuries. I’ll start from the most obvious to the more vague.
First up- Leshy
In this dialogue, he makes the connection to his blindness and his ignorance, being so out of touch with reality that he didn’t know the extent of what he was getting himself into.
Narinder’s plans were not at all a bother to him, having his own cult to run and experiment with. He relished in the devotion his chaotic ways had to offer, and because of his foolishness, he lost his sight; hence see no evil.
Now for the genocide. Once again, he explains he didn’t know the full extent of what he was getting himself into, more focused on what had happened rather than what will happen. Therefore he thoughtlessly agreed, seeing how his siblings were compliant to Shamura’s orders.
He never saw the evil in the actions of his peers until it was too late, his eyes acting as both a symbol and punishment for his ignorance to all around him.
Next- Kallamar
This can be easily skipped if you didn’t pay attention to the dialogue, but he explains that all of which he has heard he wishes to unhear.
I already explained this in my other post, but he knew of Narinder’s plans, and instead of speaking out, he cowers and wishes he never knew of it in the first place. Unlike Leshy, who remained ignorant on the matter, Kallamar knew too much.
For the genocide (Which might explain the Mystic Sellers description of Kallamar), he hesitates when he hears of Shamura’s orders to kill all Lambs. A part of him knows that what they’re doing is wrong, but rather than listening to his sense of justice, he complies. An action in which he regrets.
He hears too often, and wishes to not hear. He listens, and yet doesn’t listen to himself. His ears act as a symbol and punishment for his cowardice and lack of self.
Now- Heket
This one is a little less obvious than the previous ones, but only a small part admits it. Heket shows her love for her siblings quite often despite being the cruelest of them. So imagine her despair once everything fell out of order.
For Narinder’s plans, she was most likely unaware of them before it was too late. And once everything started falling out of order, she was demanding for everything to go back to normal, urging her siblings for all that has gone wrong to right itself, and finally in her most vulnerable state, begged for the family she once knew to come back together, knowing that it never would.
After being left vulnerable, her despair turned into rage targeted at Narinder. She was determined to protect her remaining siblings, and in turn, immediately agreed upon hearing Shamura’s orders to carry out the slaughter of all Lambs. She heard the lambs scream and beg with their lungs, cry for lost loved ones, and demand justice for those who have been wronged. Though, she showed no remorse; for she knew there was none.
She screamed and begged for her family, and in turn heard others scream for their own. Her throat symbolizes and acts as punishment for the injustice she faced herself, and for the injustice she caused others.
Finally- Shamura
Shamura’s dialogue is the longest of the Bishops, as well as the most confusing for me to pick apart.
Shamura knew of Narinder’s plans, and yet decided to tell nobody. They knew of the risks of supporting such practices, yet went along with it anyways until the consequences were apparent. Then and there, they decided to put a stop to it all, banishing Narinder to his own realm.
This part would just be a guess in order to connect the dots, but I have a feeling that Shamura and Clauneck conversed one day. On that day, the cards were drawn, telling of a lamb that would slay all the Bishop and set the Chained One free. Shamura didn’t accept this, and politely dismissed themselves, almost immediately thinking on how to avoid such a fate.
One day after resting for years, they come up with a solution- that solution is of course, to destroy all lambs. They order their remaining siblings to hunt them down, spreading propaganda, putting bounty’s on their heads, and spreading plauge and famine across the lands.
They feed their siblings lies about the prophecy, twisting and molding their fate to bring a sense of hope to their siblings. Eventually, they start believing their own lie, convincing themselves that blood must be spilled in order to preserve the Old Faith.
They spin and mold the web to their liking, though eventually it will all come apart, and all that they’re left with is guilt. Their skull symbolizes the strings they pulled. The lies they fed. The guilt of knowing. The guilt of deceiving. All of it. For it is the way they will be punished.
All of these are basically my take on the whole thing, and are not confirmed besides the dialogue. I just enjoy piecing everything together because this game is just so amazing!! Also if you made it to here, thank you for reading all of that, and if you have any thoughts or corrections, feel free to comment and or repost!!
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| always by your side!
synopsis: forced to change companies, your dream of being an actress and all your hard work has been washed away, but for some reason even with the events that have unfolded you find yourself thanking the gods above for bringing you to haerin.
— idol!khaerin × 6thmember!fem!reader
(っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ(っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ(っ˘̩╭╮˘̩)っ(っ˘̩╭
you lift your head from the table, dreading the idea of the upcoming news from the manager of the class you're currently at. you were updated that there might be changes in the company, you're one of the trainees for voice acting and there's rumors surrounding the company that they might send trainees to a korean entertainment label. if you were older than you are today, you wouldn't be that bothered by the news — but that's not the case, you were one of the youngest and current trainees for acting lessons. you knew that the company might be thinking that you are not gonna be much of a big loss to them, but you were desperate to prove them wrong.
yet, it seems a little too impossible as you shuffle on your seat. you raise yourself up from the chair and take deep breaths, your eyes spot the familiar face of the manager and an expression of grimace engulfed your face.
"don't take this a little too hard y/n, i know you've only been here for a few months but you're already attached to everyone." you nod but in all honesty you really can't process whatever the ceo was saying, it's hard to imagine the changes of pace and environment — who knows what kind of people she'll be seeing there?
"i heard i would end up on a different route if i was to be sent to that company. i signed up to be an actress — don't you think it's cruel for me to end up taking a whole different career?" you tell him but he stays head strong, only staring at your puppy eyes.
he sighs and puts a hand on his forehead.
"i know, i know. even i think it's cruel for the ceo to decide something like that, but we're in deep trouble. this is the only way to save the other trainees and don't you see the positive side? a job like being an idol is a very flexible job, you can do it all at once." he explains but you want to disagree, you don't want to do all things at once.
but it's too late, isn't it?
it really is, you realize as you sat at the office of ador entertainment. all your bags and luggages have been sent inside the shared dorm of your future co-member's, the girls were as confused as you were.
"oh, it's you y/n." you hear the sound of shoes getting closer and as you look up, your eyes meet with your new ceo — min heejin. you can only smile at her, not so confident as you try to look for a piece of yourself to show off.
"good morning." you tell her, actually she isn't so bad, this isn't your first meeting with her — you remember how shallow your brain was that day, it was a nerve wracking moment for you.
"i'm sorry once again about how sudden the news has been, but i hope you know i'm grateful you accepted it with honesty for yourself. i've given you ample time to decide and you still agreed, i hope you won't change your mind anymore." you appreciate her thoughts but there really isn't any choice left for you to choose, this is just about to be your fate and you're bound to accept it no matter how much you hated it.
you smile at her, not that sincere but you were trained for this.
"oh, i guess i realized that a part of me may have been meant for this. who knows right?" you shrug at her and she returns it with a bright grin.
"i'm so happy, i hope you know why i chose you out of all the trainees there. it's not just because there was no one left but because i think you're the perfect fit, there's something i see in you that i think you don't see in yourself." she says, you're starting to think she's sugarcoating it — because the last time you checked the circumstances it just seems like your old company was in deep debt and needed a sacrificial lamb to pay for it; which turned out to be you.
you chuckle, don't really know whether to believe or not; but it doesn't matter anymore.
"oh really? i personally think that's such a nice thing to say, almost a little too nice." you tell her but she was unfazed, you can see that she's really holding on to her words, like she meant it and that it was genuine.
you cannot interfere.
"yes, i'm quite excited because i'm sure the girls would love you. who wouldn't? i have so much high hopes for you and the future of newjeans, you all would be a hit. everyone will love newjeans." you can't even get mad at how happy heejin looks right now, maybe this is just really her passion.
yeah sure the girls would love you, but how about you? you gloat about the idea of being in a group, you don't want to work with people, the idea of being dragged down or dragging people down sucks. and think about the burden that it is to work with multiple people, you hated that idea.
after all, you've always been alone.
"i don't really know about that, i'm pretty sure they're acquainted with each other and are close but how about me?" you find yourself immediately fiddling with your finger, for some reason you don't know why too but a part of you is quite intimidated of what was coming your way. strangers, new people, new places and a new environment.
"don't worry, the girls are nice and well behaved, they are well put and have manners. if anything, i'm quite confident you'll like them. i gave minji all the instructions needed for tonight."
oh right, you're moving inside the dorm tonight. and you wonder what the girls are thinking.
"i'm excited! i wonder what type of person she is, i mean from the sound of it i'm already expecting that she's very cool." hanni does a finger gun towards danielle's direction, earning a small laugh from the girl as they make their way to the living room. the four girls all sit on the couches around the room, haerin's eyes traces along the floor to the bags and luggages hanging by the corner of the place.
"honestly, all i want is to see her already. i want us to be friends as soon as possible!" danielle beams, minji nods and clasps her hands together, worried but at the same time excited. they didn't have that much information regarding the new addition to the group, all they got from heejin is small details, like she's kind and cute.
it's enough to get the girls going except from a certain feline-like member.
haerin is nervous.
she's been thinking about this since yesterday, laying on her bed she can't get the thought of you finally coming face to face with them, it's been keeping her up since the day it was announced.
she wanted everything perfect the moment you step a foot inside, the place is clean, every nook and cranny, the members look presentable, there should be food already ready, not a delivered food but home cooked meals. haerin does not know why she feels like this but she wanted to make a good impression for the first day.
she's usually lazy, but tonight she made sure everything was in order so that not even the members could notice her weird behavior.
"are you okay haerin?" hyein asks, leaning on the couch while raising a brow at the older girl, haerin nods and makes her way to the kitchen to check the cookies she baked with danielle.
haerin is shy, she tries her best to communicate but sometimes it's very hard, this causes her social life to sometimes be in a rumble, because she's not very talented in talking to people. as someone who is happy to welcome you in the dorm, she's scared she might mess it up because of how awkward and quiet she is.
"haerin~ what are you doing there?" hanni sneaks behind the taller girl and puts her hands on haerin's shoulders. the younger girl is quick to turn her head. "u-uh hey."
hanni laughs and rubs haerin's shoulders. "are you nervous, you seem out of it since yesterday. always so skittish but worse, something bothering you?" hanni asks, smiling at the kang who lets out a small breath but does not reply.
haerin shifts her eyes away, she intertwines her fingers with each other, pursing her lips. "i'm just nervous." haerin whispers, gaining a soft laugh from hanni who then hugs her side. "oh really? you really want this night to be good for her, right?" hanni asks, rubbing her hand on haerin's forearm. haerin couldn't help but blush. "yeah, i didn't really want to say it but — we have to make sure she feels nice and comfortable here with us."
hanni squeals. "gosh haerin you're so adorable. we also think that way, i mean she's going to be our new addition, we'll be together for a long time."
haerin laughs. "i'm just so bothered, i couldn't stop thinking about it for almost a week. i don't want her to dislike me for being awkward." hanni shakes her head and hits haerin gently. "oh come on, she's going to love you like we do. you're like the most adorable girl ever, and you're like a cute cat. i trust our ceo with her choice, she's going to be good. i promise."
when you step a foot inside for the first time, you couldn't help but notice the very warm atmosphere inside the living room. it was empty when you came in with heejin and the smell of fresh food came wafting around the air.
"seems like the girls are busy, i'm going to check on them." you nod at heejin and smile at her. you like how clean the living room is, the colors are nice and the interior is very welcoming. you make your way to one of the couches and take a seat, the mattress sinking with your weight above. your hands are on your knees, you caress your lap to prepare yourself.
"here they are." you look up to see the girls, one by one they come inside with two of them carrying a tray of snacks and the other has water. you stand up and greet them, awkwardly pushing your hands out for a handshake, in which the oldest took oh so eagerly.
"i'm kim minji." her round eyes meets yours, her thick eyebrows take your attention and you can't help but smile at her.
"hi i'm pham hanni! i'm so happy to finally see you!" the shortest girl says, her hands are soft and gentle.
"i'm marsh danielle! you look really amazing! i'm so happy i can just melt on the spot." you laugh at her. "please don't." you mutter with a bit on your bottom lip.
haerin takes a step forward and brushes her hands on her clothes as if dusting the dirt away.
she anxiously takes your hands and shake them, you can't help but notice the way it trembles under your touch and you worry she might be sick the way her face is almost as red as a tomato — her feline-like eyes can't keep themselves from shifting away.
"i— uhm, my name… i'm kang haerin." she whispers but audible enough for you. you like her voice, the most.
you pull your hands away and you see haerin checking her own hands, her irises looks like she's checking out the lines on her palm.
a pair of hands takes yours and shakes them violently. "oh my god! it's really you! i'm so happy! i'm lee hyein!" the tallest girl says, your eyes examine her plum lips and sharp eyes.
you let go of her and gave her a small nod, she's adorable. yeah, you can say they're not that bad overall but… still, you have to make sure — you don't want to live with them for 5+ years still feeling uncomfortable.
the first few days consist of going around the dorm, training and just sitting together eating lunch and dinner.
you like minji the most, you appreciate her mature thinking, she's someone who knows when to be serious and when to joke around. you realize that she's very reliable, like a rock to lean on when the land tilts.
danielle is someone who you can trust when it comes to advice, she's someone who knows her words and has a holistic thinking approach in every situation. she looks on the bright side and sees the bigger picture, always positive and smiling.
haerin is awkward and quiet. but among all the members, she's the one who you're sure can understand you the most.
you like how she doesn't talk a lot when you're alone with her, it's not like you hate when hanni and hyein does it but sometimes, you need a quiet time too. you can tell that she knows you're getting yourself used to the new places, she's always right behind you.
you don't hate her presence, but it's not like you love it too.
things are really awkward with her, it's almost like she gets really skittish when you get near her, her face is always a different shade of red, her eyes are always everywhere but yours.
it makes you double guess if she hates you or not, but to say hate would be too much — maybe she's not used yet?
that must be it.
"hey haerin, can you pass me the remote?" you ask haerin, you look at her there's a small meter separating you and her on the couch. your eyes scan her bothered expression while she reads a book very attentively.
you want to reach for the remote yourself but her figure is blocking the view of the remote from your position. you scoot close to her and clear your throat in order to get her attention. "haerin?"
she doesn't reply. you scoot once again, your shoulder touching hers. haerin shuffles on her seat almost immediately as your bare shoulders touch her and puts her book down while looking at you with wide eyes and blushing cheeks.
"w-what?" she asks.
you look everywhere and smile at her. "i said, can you pass me the remote? i was planning to watch the discovery channel." haerin blinks and nods, closing her lips tight with a sheepish expression.
she moves and reaches for the remote and passes it over to you, but as you hold the remote, your fingers brush against hers causing her to immediately let go of the remote — with you being startled, you drop the remote on the carpeted floor.
"haerin?" haerin looks up at you and she reaches for the remote, then she hands it over to you. you stare at her and watch as she shifts away, pushing a strand of her hair behind her cute red ears.
"you're red." you tell her, haerin scoffs and turns her head away.
"it's nothing."
practice is finally over, you sit on the floor with your eyes scanning over the studio, back against the gigantic mirror. the other four girls are busy taking their time to perfect their moves, trying to polish their steps.
you're still not used to this way, it's harder and you physically can't keep up sometimes.
haerin is a great dancer, you envy and admire her moves and the way she puts her whole self to the music, letting the rhythm guide her body the way the beat intended it to be. you wish you had that kind of talent, you're not that bad but certainly could be better, it's not that hard to admit and you're always open for criticisms.
you feel a presence beside you, you shift your head to see haerin taking a seat next to you, her back also now against the mirror. you smile at the sight of her eyes watching over the other girls, she's sometimes so serious it's always so interesting.
"have you drank water already?" you ask her, seeing as she's still taking time catching her breath, sweat continues to roll over her cheeks. haerin turns her head to you and stretches her lips into a smile. "yes, i'm just taking a short break." you nod and scoot closer to her.
haerin swears she could feel her skin crawl, it's such a weird sensation but it feels funny.
"make it longer, you look tired." you whisper to her, she laughs sheepishly and scratches her cheek, feeling the burst of warmth washing inside of her again. this feels so weird, but she's always like this with you.
haerin pouts for a second only. "you did great." she mutters, eyes finding themselves lost in yours. you smile, nodding. "you did great too, so it's time to rest for a bit." haerin shakes her head.
"no, i mean you really did well. i know you're still bothered and you're always trying, but you're doing great, you're catching up to us already." haerin whispers, almost leaning closer for you to hear her. you shrug, your eyes watches as she looks away, her cheek and left ear close to your lips.
"hmm… really? i wasn't really trained for this." you whisper against her ear, your breath fanning over her skin, causing waves of electricity coursing inside of her, enough to raise the hair in her arms.
your body is close to hers, clothed bodies touching as her arm wraps around your torso, your hands on her knees.
"yeah, but you're already a great singer. dancing would be a piece of cake for you." she tells you but her eyes are still somewhere else, you wonder what part of the thin air must have took her interest. you chuckle, leaning on her shoulder. "really? i still have a lot to learn." you feel her body stiffen to your touch, and as if no one else is inside the room, your hand reaches for her other hand.
haerin shakes her head, now her cheeks are obviously dusted with the color of pink. her sharp eyes are taking your attention, she's like a cat in every form and every way.
have you mentioned before how much you love cats?
how much you might have loved haerin?
because you don't even know that yourself.
"yeah, and it's not just you but everyone of us." you like haerin, maybe just a friend, or maybe more but really, how are you supposed to know?
your relationship went on like that for almost a few more months, and as time passes by, you start to get fond of these feelings for her and haerin starts to realize that she might love you a little too much.
it's the way she's always so giddy, skittish, shy, attentive and conscious about her surroundings when she's with you. she's so aware of every detail about you, those little things and she notes them inside her brain. she's starting to really enjoy staring at your face when you're doing something, even from afar, she takes a short glimpse of your face when you least expect it.
every word you say makes her happy, you're so wise and so good when it comes to choosing the right words to say.
that also what she fears the most, it's not really easy dealing with feelings like these. the thoughts of you keep her wide awake every night, she daydreams of you and sometimes she can't get you out of her mouth.
she likes your perfume, the way you dress, your hair, your eyes, your lips, your cheeks and the way your irises are weak at the sight of haerin.
so many fascinating things about you.
you're really a nightmare dressed like a daydream.
because it's true that haerin loves you, but behind these feelings are the fears of what lies behind the consequences of her actions.
how long does she have to keep this a secret? haerin might get in trouble.
sometimes her heart beats a little too hard for her to calm it down, like it's threatening to rip her chest apart.
"is there something wrong?" you ask haerin, she's been staring at the television for too long, it's already late at night and the television is going static already. you come down from upstairs to find haerin standing in the living room alone, the lights are off and the television is still on but is showing nothing but the colorful display of emptiness.
haerin only moves when you place a hand on her cheek, she looks at you and blinks her eyes.
"don't stare at the tv like that, you're going to get a migraine." haerin rubs her eyes and sighs. you press your hand on her cheeks to feel how warm the skin under your palm is. "are you really okay?" you really can't see her face in the dark, it makes you wonder if she's sick or not but her face is really warm.
haerin shakes her head. "yeah, i'm alright. i just spaced out." the light from the television illuminates both of you, you can only see her eyes and the details of her face.
haerin feels your palm rub her cheek, it makes her feel nervous and putty, like a melted marshmallow.
"how long have you been standing here?" you ask her, pulling your hand off of her face. she feels dread swallowing her when she loses contact with you.
"i don't know, i'm tired and picked up a glass of water but found myself here." you laugh at what she said, your expression made haerin feel dizzy, what makes it worse is that you even thought of placing a hand on her shoulder.
you're so close to her, she can practically feel your warmth embracing her.
"haerin, you're so random. you're tired, right? let's just sleep. come on." you rub your hand on her shoulder and as you're planning to pull your hand away again, she holds it with her hand. "y/n. have i told you something?" haerin asks, her voice sounds serious, but not intimidating.
you raise your brow at her and shake your head. "no, what do you want to say?"
haerin looks down and bites her bottom lip. "uhm, you see. i've been losing sleep a couple of times — since, i don't when but it's been on and off for me. it's just that i can't really find myself, over the past few months, my mind kept on shuffling. you know, i'm so out of it."
you nod, you feel her hand caress your hand, you smile. "nightmares?" if truth be told, the thought of you could be a dream but the circumstances are nothing but a nightmare.
"no. it's because —" pause. haerin takes a deep breath.
"i really, no — i have these thoughts that have been bugging me. y/n, i don't know how things will end after this." she continues, you listen very well, watching the way her eyes move, looking at you then everywhere.
"things will go well after, haerin." you answer her.
haerin nods. "oh, but it's about you. y/n, it's because i like you a lot…" there's nothing but silence, you can tell she wants to say something again but she's hesitating.
"what else?"
haerin locks her eyes with yours, she gulps down the courage.
"i really love you more than just a friend, you know i love everything about you and it's bothering me how if i let these feelings pass me by it's going to bite me back again. i can't just be your friend, that's the thought that i hate. i really hate it." haerin sighs, the hand on her shoulder — she pulls it away and holds it with her two hands.
haerin finds comfort in your presence, you only look at her and smile yet even without any response, haerin still feels comforted by your warmth.
you were always warm, there was never a day where you were cold.
"really? how come i never realized?" you giggle, looking at your hand in hers.
"we were too caught up. i guess?"
the thought that you love her too makes haerin weak, she remembers how nervous she was before because you might dislike her. she's still the same awkward and shy girl, but now she's sure you're her friend.
the only thing left for her to fear is the thought you might not love her the way she loves you.
you shrug. "i guess i was, but either way — i'm sorry for your sleepless nights." haerin looks at you and smiles. you lean close to her and gave her a kiss on her cheek, the sensation made haerin's knees weak.
as surprised haerin was, she can't help but smile.
you stay close to her, your hand and her hands between you and haerin's chests.
"i love you too haerin." you whisper.
haerin laughs, her grin is wide and bright.
you love her.
not just as a friend.
how is she supposed to sleep knowing that you don't just like her, but you also love her? how is she supposed to just stay still?
"don't you want to sleep already? we can leave all the worries for the other day." you mutter, eyes fix on hers.
haerin nods and leans in, forehead touching yours, she whispers back. "where? your room?"
you scrunch your nose. "how about yours?"
haerin shakes her head. "no,"
"why not?"
haerin shifts her eyes away. "because minji said so."
"because it's not cleaned yet? i know you haerin." you tease her, chasing her gaze.
you continue. "let's go. my room. we can cuddle until we fall asleep."
you both make your way upstairs, every step is light, attentive, trying not to catch any attention or make any noise. you let her lead you to your room, opening the door for you.
laughter spills out of your lips as you lay down the bed with her, tucking your bodies under the weighted blanket. you wrap your hand around her torso, burying your head on her neck.
"good night haerin, stay here okay?" you give her another kiss on her cheek, this one isn't a quick peck.
haerin nods, blushing.
"right, good night."
you close your eyes.
"i love you."
haerin hums, closing her eyes too.
"i love you too."
that night you realized how lucky you might have been, that the whole incident might have been a blessing in disguise — how the harsh winds have brought you to meet haerin and newjeans.
you dread it before, but now you can't help but be thankful. you found yourself in another family, finally realizing you aren't alone and you have someone to lean on.
that you have not just haerin but the whole group to share sentiments with.
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