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#let me know if any of the links are incorrect of not working
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Please, if you can, take a moment to read and share this because I feel like I'm screaming underwater.
NPD (Narcissistic Personality Disorder) stigma is rampant right now, and seems to be getting progressively worse. Everyone is using it as a buzzword in the worst ways possible, spreading misinformation and hatred against a real disorder.
I could go on a long time about how this happened, why it's factually incorrect (and what the disorder actually IS), why it's harmful, and the changes I'd like to see. But to keep this concise, I'll simply link to a few posts under the cut for further reading.
The point of this post is a plea. Please help stop the spread of stigma. Even in mental health communities, even around others with personality disorders, in neurodivergent "safe" spaces, other communities I thought people would be supportive in (e.g. trans support groups, progressive spaces in general), it keeps coming up. So I'm willing to bet that a lot of people on this site need to see this.
Because it's so hard to exist in this world.
My disorder already makes me feel as if I'm worthless and unlovable, like there's something inherently wrong and damaged about me. And it's so much harder to fight that and heal when my daily life consists of:
Laughing and spending time with my friends, doing my utmost best to connect and stay present and focused on them, trying to let my guards down and be real and believe I'm lovable- when suddenly they throw out the word "narcissist" to describe horrible people or someone they hate, or the conversation turns to how evil "people with narcissistic personality disorder" are. (Seriously, you don't know which of your friends might have NPD and feels like shit when you say those things & now knows that you'd hate them if you knew.)
Trying to look up "mental health positivity for people with npd", "mental health positivity cluster bs", only to find a) none of that, and b) more of the same old vile shit that makes me feel terrible about myself.
Having a hard time (which is constant at this point) and trying to look up resources for myself, only to again, find the same stigma. And no resources.
Not having any clue how to help myself, because even the mental health field is spitting so much vitriol at people with DISORDERS (who they're supposed to be helping!) that there's no solid research or therapy programs for people like me.
Losing close friends when they find out, despite us having had a good relationship before, and them KNOWING me and knowing that I'm not like the trending image of pwNPD. Because now they only see me through the lens of stigma and misinformation.
Hearing the same stigma come up literally wherever I go. Clubs. Meetings. Any online space. At the bus stop. At the mall. At a restaurant. At work. Buzzword of the year that everyone loooves loudly throwing around with their friends or over the phone. Feels awesome for me, makes my day so much better/s
I could go on for a long time, but I'm scared no one will read/rb this if it gets too much longer.
So please. Stop using the word "narcissist" as a synonym for "abusive".
Stop bringing up people you hate who you believe to have NPD because of a stigmatizing article full of misinformation whenever someone with actual NPD opens their mouth. (Imagine if people did that with any other disorder! "Hey, I'm autistic." "Oh... my old roommate screamed at me whenever I made noise around him, and didn't understand my needs, which seems like sensory overload and difficulty with social cues. He was definitely autistic. But as long as you're self-aware and always restraining your innate desire to be an abusive asshole, you're okay I guess, maybe." ...See how offensive and ignorant that is?)
Stop preventing healthcare for people with a disorder just because it's trendy to use us as a scapegoat.
If you got this far, thank you for reading, and please share this if you can. Further reading is under the cut.
NPD Criteria, re-written by someone who actually has NPD
Stigma in the DSM
Common perception of the DSM criteria vs how someone may actually experience them (Keep in mind that this is the way I personally experience these symptoms, and that presentation can vary a lot between individuals)
"Idk, the stigma is right though, because I've known a lot of people with NPD who are jerks, so I'm going to continue to support the blockage of treatment for this condition."
(All of these were written by me, because I didn't want to link to other folks' posts without permission, but if you want to add your own links in reblogs or replies please feel free <3)
#actuallynpd#signal boost#actuallyautistic#mental health awareness#narcissistic personality disorder#people also need to realize that mental health professionals aren't immune from bias#(it really shouldn't come as a shock that the mental health field has a longstanding pattern of misunderstanding and mistreating ppl who ar#mentally ill or otherwise ND)#the first therapist i brought up NPD to like. literally pulled out the DSM bc she could barely remember the criteria. then said that there'#no way I have it because I have low self-esteem lmaoooooo#anyway throwback to being at work and chatting with a co-worker. and the conversation turning to mental health. and him saying that#he tries to stay informed and be aware and supportive of mental health conditions & that he doesn't want to be ignorant or spread harmful#misinformation. and then i mentioned that i do a lot of research into mental health stuff and i listed a bunch of things. which included#several personality disorders. one of which was NPD.#and after listening to my whole ass list he zeroed in on the NPD and immediately started talking about how narcissists are abusive and#he knew someone who had NPD and how the person who had it had an addiction and died from the addiction in a horrible way and he#was glad he did#fun times#or when i decided to be vulnerable and talk abt my self-criticism/self-hatred bc i knew my friends also struggled w that and i wanted to#support them by sharing my own coping methods. and they both(separately!) started picking and prodding at my npd through the lens of stigma#bc i'd recently opened up to them abt having it. they recognized self-hatred as a symptom and still jumped on me for it. despite me#trying to share hurt vulnerable parts of myself to help them and connect with them.#again..... fun times
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thesuperiorrobin · 1 year
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➳ Reminder that all of these are Female reader insert
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─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── one shots ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
✶| Headline |
➳ Dating Damian Wayne was It’s pros and cons, cons being the press follows you almost every where when you’re alone or with Damian.
✶| Truth hurts |
➳ you find the truth about that scar on his chest
✶| He has feelings? | part two |
➳ Damian has been coming home late after his patrol, coming home smelling like strong feminine perfume. His brother follow him one night and they are in for a surprise
✶| Her laughter brings me joy |
➳Damians is in loved with the way you laugh. His brothers tease him about it
| “I promise I’m not scared of you” |
➳scarecrow uses you as bait and an experiment for his fear toxin leaving you in fear of someone precious to you
✶ | Is that my shirt? |
➳ playing with Titus a fun but sometimes he gets a little to competitive
✶| “Kind hard to focus when you look like that” |
➳ Damian find you staring at him while he does his daily workout session
✶ | “I don’t like sleeping alone anymore” |
➳ Damian confronts you after acting weird this past couple of days only to find out you haven’t been sleeping, but for what reason?
✶| “He’s only soft with you ” |
➳ Damians really whipped for you if he’s nice
✶ | “He lost his virginity!?” |
➳ the batfamily notice Damian acting off these past couple of months and come up with weird ideas as to why
✶ | “Don’t say a word about this” | Ft: Alfred|
➳ Pennyworth has to keep yet another secret
✶ | Media is stupid |
➳ you and Damian play with social apps—giving people taste of your love life
✶ | “Dance with me ” |
➳ you and Damian dance together at one of Bruce’s Galas and the attention is set on both of you.
✶ | lipstick Stain | part 1 | Part 2 |
➳ a TikTok trend that leads to the media coming crazy
✶ | “Crazy idea let’s make out” |
➳ teens being teens Y’know?
✶ | punished by my body |
➳ period are never fun. Especially when they keep you from killing you for seeing Damian.
✶ | untitled |
✶ | Rainy days |
➳ Damian realizes that the rain rain always put you in a mood—getting moody once you fix your attention one the thunder rather then his lips
✶ | Thoughts |
➳ Damian is neglecting his duties as being your husband—I’m result puts bad thought in your head that make your two confront him about it.
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── Headcannons ─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
✮ Damian Wayne, the blood son of playboy billionaire Bruce way. Damian Wayne doesn’t live up to the playboy title like his father back in the day
✮ Fem!Reader having a crush on Damian Wayne
✮ Boyfriend!Damian Wayne
✮ Hispanic!Fem!Reader
✮ Damian Wayne doesn’t get crushes
✮ husband! Damian Wayne
✮ bat boys type
✮ random Damian Wayne headcannons
✮ Platonic reader
✮ Quality time
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── scenarios─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
❀ Damian Wayne hates galas , more then he hates his brothers.
❀ Damian ‘Clingy’ Wayne
❀ his bed is more comfortable
❀ “I loves you’s” coming from him
❀ Damian’s not a big fan of holidays
❀ thinking about league of assassins! Damian Wayne
❀ he’s sick to his stomach every time he looks at you
❀ never question why’s your hair is always up
❀ Damian doesn’t get sick often but when he does…
❀ argument | Part 1 | Part 2 | Part 3 |
─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ── Random─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆
✄ incorrect quotes!
One, two, three, four, five, Six, Seven(Jason Todd)
✄ Instagram!
One, two, three
✄ message between you two!
One, two
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This is a years worth of writing that I managed to put on one page 🥲
Just let me know if any of the links aren’t working
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Alessandro Volta's Electric Eels
Okay so, it turns out that your cell phone battery is a basically a homunculus of an electric fish. 
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These are the same thing. Let me explain.
@fishteriously, a paleoichthyologist, told me that Alessandro Volta invented the electric battery after studying electric eels and rays.  This sounded like a fun science factoid!  I wanted to know more!  I saw the claim repeated on any number of pop science articles from the last century or so, but none that quoted from primary sources.
The voltaic pile is one of the most important inventions, ever, of all time.  Before Volta, electricity could be stored in Leyden jar capacitors, which would discharge in a single, brief burst. Volta's pile was the first method of producing a continuous electric current, which launched the modern era of electricity as we know it. His explanation for how it worked was incorrect, but it was still a massive breakthrough.
Batteries use the same principle to this day, just with different materials (e.g. cobalt oxide, graphite, and lithium salts rather than silver, zinc, and brine).
But is it a fish?
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This is Volta's first schematic of a battery, or "voltaic pile" – at the time, "battery" referred to a bunch of Leyden jars linked in series, the term wouldn't come to refer to piles until later. "Z" and "A" stand for zinc and silver ("argentum"), with brine-soaked paper disks between. It does look a bit like an eel?
But is it truly?
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Surely, if Volta modeled the pile after electric fishes, I’d be able to find a citation!  Wikipedia is usually a good place to start when hunting primary sources, but no luck.  No mention of fish at all.  I trust fishteriously more than wikipedia, however, so I went digging.  Looks like Volta first reported his discovery in a Letter to the Royal Society in 1800.
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Found the letter!
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Aw beans, it’s in French.  I haven’t studied French since high school.
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BUT WAIT. WHAT WAS THAT.
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Une commotion électrique? A trembling eel???
Okay so now I NEEDED to read the letter in English. I found an English-language summary published by the Royal Society, but it looks like the only English translation of the full letter was in the appendix of an out-of-print book called “Alessandro Volta and the Electric Battery.”
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So I bought a used copy. Let's see what Volta has to say about this:
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"To this apparatus ... I have constructed it, in its form to the natural electric organ of the torpedo or electric eel, &c, than to the Leyden flask and electric batteries [battery = linked Leyden flasks], I would wish to give the name of artificial electric organ."
Yes! The voltaic pile was explicitly modeled after electric fishes – torpedo rays and electric eels.  Fishteriously was 100% correct. Volta never even calls it a "pile," it is always "artificial electric organ." A significant portion of the letter is devoted to electric eels and torpedo rays, in fact.
But also, the rest of the letter is bonkers.
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He wrote pages on painful experiments with the artificial electric organ – touching it, poking it into his eyes and ears, making other people touch it, generally just shocking the ever loving hell out of himself over and over. He routinely shocks himself so hard that he has to take breaks. And of course, he licks it.
But that's not the best part:
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He says that the artificial electric organ can be turned sideways and submerged in liquid...
"...by which means these cylinders would have a pretty good resemblance to the electric eel ... they might be joined together by pliable metallic wires or screw springs, and then covered with a skin terminated by a head and tail properly formed, &c."
There you have it. One of the most important scientific discoveries of all time, and it includes a crafts project for building an authentic electric eel puppet.
In summary, next time you charge your phone, take a moment to thank the soul of the electric fish inside of it.
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SO, i've succeeded at getting the cockles masterlist up to date in the google doc (barring a few posts that are still in my queue), but when i went to work on posting the new stuff, i found that tumblr now has a link limit of 100 links per post (i think it used to be 200 or 250).
presently, the masterlist is 27 solid pages of bulleted links, so i kind of shudder to think just how many posts i'd need to split it up into for tumblr to allow it. 20? 30? it's been a pain just with 6.
sooo i'm thinking, are we all cool with it just being updated from here on in the google doc? (or a comparable format anyone would like to rec, since google is, you know, evil.) i won't delete the existing posts or anything, but it's a LOT easier to update in the google doc, which means i could do it more often. but i recognize that it may be a bigger pain to visit the links, since i'm often made to click a 'i'm not a robot' check when i click on them.
if anyone really wants the tumblr post version, i suppose i could just do it in a simplified way instead of being perfectionist about it.
and if you're cool with the google doc format, you can go visit it now; i've integrated the updates and added 🐚s to mark new links. (a 🐚 with a ↓ indicates that everything below that point is new.) enjoy! we've had so much content in the past year that i added 4 pages and a whole new section!
(also please feel free to let me know if you find any errors or incorrect links. i just found a few links today that didn't work and i was able to fix them.)
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sanzaibian · 3 months
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“Sir, here are the Beatty files.” The young woman told me, handing a USB key.
I have heard a lot about these files. They were intercepted in the town after which they’re named by the secret services a while ago, but were encrypted in such a puzzling way that only now can we view them. And of course, I am the first one to be able to review its content.
I know a lot of things, as it is my job to be informed of anything and everything happening around the world. I know the plans of China over Taiwan, the successor to the Ayatollah, the contents of the talks between Putin and Kim Jong-un, and all the current US military strategy. In my line of work, everything can happen, yet at no single point could I make sense of the Beatty files. Nor could anyone else for that matter.
I excused the young woman, bidding to her my thanks for the deciphering team, and went to the unused laptop I had prepared. When it comes to matters of national security, I cannot afford to be careless, and let anyone unlicensed to get access to this. So brand new laptop, created by us, which has never been opened, to open these files.
And so I fiddled with the parameters a bit, entering the secret code, and inserted the USB key to view its contents. Inside were a few files, all of which videos. Their names were not informative, since I know for a fact that their original names were not recovered, so I just opened the first file in the list.
The video opened looking down in a white cubic room, meaning it was very likely a security camera recording. In addition, there was the time indicated on the bottom right, yet something felt weird about how it was displayed… 15:58… 15:59… 15:60 ???... 16:01, etc. Why is it not counting time correctly ? Nobody indicates time like this ! It’s wrong, it’s incorrect ! I just opened it and there’s already something I cannot in any way explain !
Taking a deep breath, I look at the center of the screen, in which I have a good view of a man sat in a chair. He has tanned skin, black hair and black stubble, and a very developed musculature. He looks to be a very attractive middle-eastern man, although I cannot say which ethnicity he precisely has.
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The chair he’s sitting on is quite massive, and he looks almost as if he is… restrained in it ? Yes, there seems to be little handcuffs tethering him to the armchairs. But most striking are the numerous tubes going out from his arms, legs, torso and even head, linked to some types of medical appliances I cannot recognize, as well as to a sort of glass tank.
Suddenly, I notice the deep voice of a man. I up the volume, and hear… a language I cannot understand.
“Tzai en 19/03, 2:17, en tzoujkbruoi odogattzion program en Scipio Labratory. Ny hse Hk. Adtem, tzai widt nyn hskadiais, Sjd. Fingtrosy ÿ Sd. Vagohs, ÿ naum wom fill no tzoujketvÿsn ekspÿrians widt no #1073 bymarjen.”
At first I get some German vibes from it, but then it seems to be Polish, and then French… Whatever that language might be, it is not one I have ever heard. The man in the chair looks around, seemingly half-dazed, as if he was drugged. I don’t know what will happen to him, yet I get the feeling that it won’t be a desirable fate.
Suddenly, another voice, that of a woman by the looks of things, speaking in that same strange language.
“Hsüzmalhsÿv drël en im.”
Then a buzzer sound. There seems to be some white substance flowing inside the man’s body, through the tubes from the medical appliances. As it flows, I can see his eyes starting to become more droopy, before fluttering, and then closing. At the same time, his body starts floundering in the restraints, as if he was keeping himself from falling asleep. But as time went on and the white liquid ran dry, all of his muscles were relaxing and his stance become limp, like that of a dysfunctional robot. However, looking at his accelerating breathing rhythm, it seems to my trained eye that he is not actually asleep. It’s only his body refusing to function correctly.
“Drël ingkatzt. Etvÿsn harjimÿll.” Says another voice, deeper than the last one, but not as deep as the first one.
I don’t really know what’s happening. If the counter on the bottom-right of the screen wasn’t ticking up, I would have thought that the image was frozen. But then, suddenly, I can hear a low sound in the recording. And that sounds starts creeping higher and higher, as if something was charging up… Yeah, definitively charging up, since I almost saw some lightning sparks going off from the chair…
I don’t know what’s happening, but it seems to be malfunctioning. The sparks make themselves more and more intense, and it almost seems as if the machine is ready to explode...
Just as I say that, the first deep voice makes itself heard once again, but this time more in a frustrated or worried tone than an official one.
“Sel heont havy… Go huop sel hstill pÿrdont...”
But suddenly, the sparks stop, and while the sound doesn’t stop, beige liquid start flowing into the pipes… from the man to the tank ? What is that thing ? I don’t understand ! However, I can hear cries of rejoice in the audience, with all three voices I’ve heard since then saying incomprehensible stuff that I wouldn’t even be able to transcribe. I guess they also didn’t think… whatever this is would work ?
I take a drink from my water bottle as I keep an eye on the video. However, since I need to reach my bag, I cannot actively monitor it. Besides, according to what I hear, nothing of note seems to be happening... But when I have put down the bottle, I stop the video. I rub my eyes, but even then, I still see it.
The man seems smaller.
Somehow.
I go back in the video to the time where the man with the deepest voice sounded worried and… Yeah, looking like that, it’s even more apparent. The man has been losing mass. And the tanks have been filled by this beige skin-color liquid… Heh, if I didn’t know I was in reality, I would have said that this is muscle-juice, but this is ridiculous…
Especially since the body mass hasn’t been the only thing to change.
As I play back the video and continue through the long haul of high-pitch noise and not much else, I notice that the man’s stubble seems to be disappearing… and his head hair growing as well, somehow ? It almost seems as if he’s becoming less masculine by the second, if it even makes any sense, even though nothing about this video actually makesanysense. If I didn’t know who supplied it to me, I would have said this was a fake…
As his pecs were shrinking, his arms were thinning, his waist narrowing and his legs slimming, his stance almost seemed to be relaxing further – if it’s even possible. I mean, I don’t know ! It’s just the impression that I’m getting ! As the last of his stubble vanishes, at least according to what I can see through the pixels, he almost seems to be getting cuter ? Whence more relaxed ? Fuck, this makes absolutely no sense whatsoever…
Oh. I know why I get this impression. It’s not anymore weird or nonsensical, but at least in this context it seems to make sense… I think he also is losing height. Yes, actually. Height. It’s almost as if someone took the textbook definition of a “twink” and decided to impart its characteristic on this poor fellow – don’t ask me why I know what it is.
As I continue watching in horror, the woman’s voice says, gleefully :
“Entzony as hen !”
How can they sound so… happy ? Happy to torture a man like this ? To, quite visibly, drain his muscles into those tanks that look more and more full ? It just goes beyond me ! Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen my fair share of horrible and unethical treatments, and a ton of unethical human experiments. But this by far takes the cake of the most disturbing thing I have ever seen ! They’re taking away what he is, his identity ! Him ! That’s the most cruel violation of human rights I have ever seen ! To gleefully disfigure someone like that…
The tanks have finished filling up, and the sound starts lowering in intensity. The man left looks only like a shadow of who he was. He still looks like himself, except devoid of any… meat, may I say ? When the machine was well and truly turned off, the deep voice rejoiced, seemingly announcing the success of that terrible plot.
“Fÿstyfuroll ! Oll fod havy kotzvong !”
Funnily enough, the first word made me think of “feast for all”, which just feels wrong given the context. On that, they all seem to have left the premises, as a nurse came in and untethered the poor man from all the equipment, and taking with her the tanks filled of muscle juice.
I continued watching, hoping that I would get to see the young man wake up.
And wake up he did, looking around, before standing up… and immediately falling. Presumably due to him not expecting to be this skinny. He then looked at himself, and had an utterly horrified look in his eyes, as if he was processing the fact that he was irremediably different.
He crawled towards the wall, and using that, he climbed back to standing, managing to take a position so that he could be looking at the camera.
And on that, the video suddenly stopped, leaving me on this freeze frame :
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I absolutely don’t know what to do with that. Now I not only understand, but also feel how confused the secret services were by intercepting this message. It just seems wrong in so many ways, so much that… it might not even have occurred on Earth for all I know ! The language is unknown, but familiar. The way to count time is disturbing, but otherwise identical to ours. The events depicted are of typical mad experimentation, but in a manner that is unthinkable in my knowledge of the world.
I don’t have the strength to view any of the other videos, since they’re likely all the same amount of disturbing. So I close the laptop, and already starts asking myself the question I need to give an answer for my superiors :
Just what the hell are the Beatty files ?!
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mynameismckenziemae · 11 months
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Hi.
Pretty much everything I post/write/reblog is for adults (18+). If you are under 18, you shouldn’t be here.
MDNI! Ageless/nameless blogs will be blocked.
*I do not consent to my work being copied, translated or published elsewhere.*
I’m McKenzie.
I write Top Gun Maverick (for now at least). None of the characters are mine.
Comments/likes/reblogs/feedback of any kind is appreciated, but please be kind (I’m sensitive 🥺).
Send me an ask if you have any questions or requests.
My (even more so) NSFW side blog is: @mckenziemae-afterdark
Masterlist:
Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin
Outlet (oneshot)
Funny Business (oneshot)
Take It Right There (oneshot)
In Case You Didn’t Know (completed series)
All of Me (ongoing series)
Jake ‘Hangman’ Seresin x Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw:
Intimate History (completed series)
I Love You Two (ongoing series)
Role Reversal (bonus scene for Intimate History but can be read alone as a oneshot)
Robert ‘Bob’ Floyd
When the Stars Align (oneshot)
Underestimated (oneshot)
Picture Perfect (oneshot)
Ain’t No Sunshine When She’s Gone (completed series)
Who Do You Belong To? (oneshot)
Every Part of You (oneshot)
Bradley ‘Rooster’ Bradshaw
She’s a Fire (completed series)
Paying For It (bonus scene for She’s a Fire, but can be read alone as a oneshot)
Unbroken (completed series)
A Little Bit Stronger (ongoing series)
Kinktober 2024
☝🏻Please let know if any of the links don’t work or are incorrect!
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cno-inbminor · 2 years
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repertum
plot: no matter how much you want alhaitham, you don’t think you can ever have him. he may or may not try to prove otherwise // ft. lumine and nahida 
warnings: afab!reader, 3.4 spoilers, smut but reader and alhaitham get blue balled, angst, fluff and comfort later. probably some incorrect game lore and timing/mechanics.
a/n: :)))))
EDIT: Part 2 (FINAL) | AO3 Link
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“I don’t–” You rush out before your breath hitches. “-- think this is a good idea, ah–”
Alhaitham keeps you pinned to the wall of your apartment, pelvis undulating against yours in an erratic beat. He drinks in every gasp that leaves your pretty little mouth, the same lips that have haunted his passing thoughts for the past month. His fingers dig into your waist and he leaves subcutaneous blooming sore spots on your shoulder and collarbone, relishing in your hisses of pain and pleasure, if the grip you have around his neck is any indicator.
Your words send a spike of adrenaline – he vehemently denies the possibility it may be fear instead – through his veins, to do anything to keep you right where he wants you, and he gives into the primal urge to dig his teeth into the very shoulder he’s been nibbling and sucking onto for the last ten minutes. The resulting yelp from you keeps him sated, and he places a soft kiss where he’d bitten you; a stark contrast.
Alhaitham lifts his head to look into your eyes, pupils swallowing over your irises and your eyelids half-open. He takes pride in having been able to push you towards such a state of inhibitions. “And what would make you think such a thing?” His lips ask against yours, tone dark with an alarming amount of clarity that you find absolutely unfair and unjust.
Despite his protests, there are several reasons why this isn’t a good idea. To be a scholar and also involved with the Akademiya’s former scribe? You’re practically begging to be academically slaughtered by the masses, as everyone knows Alhaitham has the ears of the General Mahamatra and, at times, Lord Kusanali herself. It goes both ways – having always been regarded as the level-headed, purely rational individual, most would agree that his current actions are the complete opposite. Those traits themselves are a recipe for disaster – sure, you could be witty and hold your own, but it was clear to you that you could not give him what he needs, he neither for you.
The sexual tension between you two is palpable. You briefly remember the day you first exchanged words with the man right before his new promotion. Both of you had reached for the same textbook one early, early morning, and being that it was the only copy in the entire library, you were determined to get your hands on it.
“I believe my hand was here first,” you said in a matter-of-fact tone. Part of you was screaming at yourself for even thinking about going against Alhaitham in any way, but this research paper is due next week and you will not let anyone hinder your progress. “I can give it to you when I’m done with it.”
Annoyance with a hint of amusement had crossed his features as he crossed his arms in front of his chest, the action drawing your gaze. The man had always been a great distance from you, but now seeing him up close, you can understand why some of the other scholars made it a point to mention just how attractive this man was. The brains, brawn, and looks all in a single individual? The archons were quite unfair, if you had anything to say about it.
“I believe the scholars understand they should not hinder any work of mine. It would be best for me to take it, and I will return it once I no longer need it.”
You wanted to wipe the smugness of his face. With a kiss or with a book thrown at him, you don’t care to differentiate – but the confidence he exuded was starting to irritate you, and you ignore the beginnings of an unwanted heat swirling in your core. “Well if the Scribe would so kindly lend it to me, I only need it for the next 36 hours and it will be all yours afterward. Surely your work can wait for that long?”
He took a step towards you to level with your impertinent gaze. Part of you thought you had had the higher ground, granted you were standing on a step ladder so you could reach the book, but you then saw that even with the extra centimeters, you were simply at about the same height as the man. Again, unfair.
“What is your name?” He interrogated.
“What is it to you?” You snapped back. If he really wanted to, he could demand to see your student identification credentials. But part of him wanted to hold back, to watch you bend to his will.
“I may consider granting you your wish if I can learn of your identity.”
The look of surprise on your face had been the beginning of his downfall. Normally the other scholars would have cowered beneath his presence by now. Yet the little spurts of fight from you had elicited some excitement from within, a feeling he hadn’t felt in quite a bit of time. Such emotions were for the weak for they clouded one’s judgment and logic.
“And if I don’t?”
“Then I will take this and, once again, will return it when I am done with it.”
He outstretched his hand to lay his claim on the book’s spine, fingers pressing gently against yours that were still adamant in your pursuit. Both of you made it a point to ignore how the touch made goosebumps form on your arm, thankfully hidden underneath your clothes. The Akademiya’s Scribe knowing you by name never boded well, but it was 2AM and you were perhaps too desperate.
In a state of unfounded confidence and irrationality, your fingers moved to intertwine with his. Watching his jawline slack the slightest bit fueled you, and you dragged your hands off the shelf and pressed them against his chest. With it, you leaned into the bounds of his personal space, using everything you had left in you to keep his eyes on you. Perhaps his pupils had become dilated, you can’t remember at this point, but it was enough distraction for you to use your other hand to snatch the book from its confines between other hardcovers. Once acquired, you disentangled from his grasp and took hurried steps off the step-ladder, clutching the book to your chest. You backpedaled some decimeters away to create some much needed distance. Alhaitham seemed stunned into silence. Or perhaps he was plotting your murder.
“(Y/N).”
And before you disappeared around the corner, he called out to warn, “I will see you in 36 hours.”
For many weeks afterwards, he made it a point to alert you of his presence whenever you were in the Akademiya’s building. If you were furiously annotating notes from multiple annals spread across your table, he would saunter by and subtly brush his cape against your clothes. If you were simply reading for pleasure, a knee pulled up into your chest because fuck Akademiya propriety, he would make sure to sit at the table across yours and in a chair on the side facing you head on. Did he let himself stare at you too much, finding some enjoyment in watching your facial expressions as you read? Perhaps. If it was late at night and you looked incredibly stressed, he would invite himself to look over your shoulder and observe your information, only to point out some details and offer tidbits of advice. Sometimes you found yourself in deep, research-heavy conversations and got a taste of Alhaitham’s inner workings, which only made you want more.
Tonight after a big project, he invited you to a drink at Lambad’s Tavern, though it was under the guise of needing some help bringing food back for his roommate afterwards, and you were going there anyway. Tucked in the corner, you, aided by alcohol, had let your inhibitions fall. You would need to be passed out to not feel the heat and weight of his gaze on you for the entire night, and you found yourself reveling in it. Yet it didn’t make sense – why would he find an interest in you, out of all the people within Sumeru? Alhaitham could have his pick of anyone, yet he decided to put his eggs in a basket with your name and face on it.
The thoughts stewed inside, even as he made a nonchalant offer to walk you to your apartment. “It is late, and you have no means to defend yourself.” That had been the end of it as he walked towards the path leading to the outskirts of the city, and you had no choice but to follow. At your doorstep, underneath a waning gibbous and cloudy skies, Alhaitham’s body language communicated his hesitancy in leaving you alone for the night, and with a swallow, you had invited him in for a cup of coffee.
He gave a nod. The door clicked shut. And as soon as your eyes with hints of lust met his, he made his move – surging forward to pull you into a kiss, and then spinning to press you against the wall with his thighs slotted between yours. The faint, yet unbridled moan for just mere kisses made his chest swell, and he swiped his tongue against your bottom lip.
“It’s just not – Haitham – a good idea,” you pant, thoughts back in the present moment.
“I disagree,” he retaliates, pulling back to remove your shirt. The rate of his disappearing self-control only increases when he does everything to commit this moment to memory. You’re so beautiful, he laments, torn between wanting to maintain the sanctity of your figure and forcing you to succumb and accept his attempts to claim you. He wants you to feel his kisses and bites for days, so you would never forget and inevitably crave his touch.
You don’t want to argue with him now, not when you finally have him in your hands. Your lips desperately meet his again as you unclip your bra and shrug it off. He follows suit and undoes his cape so he can pull his sleeveless shirt over his head, groaning when he pulls you close and his bare skin takes in the heat emanating from yours. Feeling your hardened nipples slide against his pectorals should not be so alluring, yet he finds himself wishing you two could stay in bed for eternity, naked and entwined and drunk on each others’ touch.
Fingers dig into his silver-gray locks and tugs, to which he answers with a punishing nip on your neck. “Bedroom,” you plead so prettily and he can only let you draw back to lead the way. He wastes little time in pressing forward until the back of your legs hit the bed frame, causing you to fall back. From mere kisses and heavy petting, the look on your face is already so sinful, and Alhaitham can’t help but imagine how you’d look once his cock was inside you.
“You siren and minx,” he sighs in faux displeasure, planting gentle pecks down your chest and abdomen until he hovers over the band of your pants. He tugs them and your underwear down with the aid of your lifted hips – and doesn’t miss the glossy thread of your slick from your vulva to the damp cotton. When it eventually breaks, he feels twinges of regret for not being able to catch it on his tongue and have a taste of you, like a man dying of thirst in the desert.
His hands have a firm grip underneath your thighs and pushes them towards your chest. Alhaitham curses when he has the full view of your pussy, puffy and wet and demanding any attention. “Haitham, please,” and you sound like you’re on the verge of tears.
“Hmm?” His voice teases as his fingers spread and his thumbs are so, so close to where you want them to be. Your pitiful cry is answered with– “Use your words. You surely have never had a problem with that.”
You beat a fist against his chest in retaliation, though there is little to no force behind it. The pathetic attempt at communicating your embarrassment is not lost on you.
Yet despite the heated blood in your veins, the near desperation to climb this high, your heart stills at the smirk sitting devilishly on his lips. You suddenly become hyperaware of every part of your body that he is seeing and touching, and the rational part of your brain returns once more to remind you, again, that this is not going to end well.
In the years that Alhaitham has roamed and trudged through the hierarchy and floors of the Akademiya, everybody knows he is not one for intimate relationships, whether it be deeper friendships or romantic partnerships. So for him to spend his precious free time with an ordinary scholar such as you, no legacy or prestige to your name – it made no sense. You are more than ready to understand that if this night were to run its due course, the end result would be the same if it were to never happen.
The dread that settles into Alhaitham’s body is murky and viscous as he watches sobering clarity fill your system, most noticeably in your eyes. Irises expanding, pupils shrinking, the life and spark from earlier swept away, don’t make much sense to him as you gently remove yourself from his grasp. “Y/N?” He inquires with some of the most uncertainty he’s felt in the last ten or so years. Adrenaline dissolves into veiled panic as he watches you slip on a new pair of underwear and an oversized sleep shirt.
“I’m sorry, I’m not feeling too well,” you supply in a meek voice, looking around and eventually finding his shirt from earlier. The man appears as dumbfounded as he can behind such a blank and austere face such as his, pulling the material back over his head and looping his arms through in a trance. He doesn’t remember following after you but finds himself back in your living room where his cloak had been haphazardly thrown onto the ground. With the way you slide it over his shoulders and make no mistake in securing it properly, he feels as if ice cold water has been dumped over his head.
And then you’re both at the front door and all he knows in this precise moment is that he really, really doesn’t want to leave.
“Thank you again for the drink,” you say, voice cracking near the end and gaze avoiding his at all costs. “You didn’t have to.”
Alhaitham chooses to say nothing, and despite how much the inner turmoil is wrecking your nervous system, you know this is for the best.
Right?
“Did I do anything wrong?”
Yes. No. Of course. Not at all. Maybe.
“No, I just don’t feel well. Maybe the alcohol isn’t agreeing with me.”
At the same time you twist the doorknob and pull, you stand on your tiptoes to plant a shaky kiss against his cheek.
“Goodnight, Alhaitham.”
It’s clear that he’s being banished now, door wide and a clear signal for him to leave. While he may want to slam the door back closed and demand all the answers he needs to the sudden change in your behavior, he simply nods and steps over the threshold, pausing when he fully steps into the hallway. The man doesn’t have the gall to face you straight on, but he lets you take one last look at his side profile, eyes glancing briefly over his shoulder.
“Have a better lie next time.”
This is for the best, you repeat to yourself minutes later when you’re curled underneath your blankets.Your breath shudders as the tears begin to stain your pillowcase, and before you slip into a fitful slumber, you worry about what dreams will greet you.
-
Alhaitham doesn’t see you for a whole week.
For seven agonizing days, 108 frustration-ridden hours, you are nowhere to be found or seen, as if you decided to hole up in your apartment and never leave your own self-made prison. It’s embarrassing, to a certain degree, just how much he’s been around the library, constantly on the lookout for your figure. Kaveh caught him reading the same page of a history book for at least ten minutes on one of those days, but chose to keep his mouth shut for once and snarky remarks to himself.
On day 8, Alhaitham wonders if he’s begun to hallucinate when he sees you in plain view at the market stand, attempting to barter with the owner to get a better deal on some vegetables. But it’s your voice he hears, your hands he sees, your hair that makes his fingers twitch in a thinly-veiled hidden desire to run them through. He’s left standing in the middle of the street looking like an idiot, yet others perceive his heavy gaze upon your figure to assume that you’re about to get into some trouble and the General Mahamatra was calling in a favor of some sorts.
On day 11, he catches you running up the pathway that leads to the Sanctuary of Surasthana, which is bewildering and confusing in its entirety. What business do you have being anywhere near the residence of Lord Kusanali? Even he as the former Scribe, favored and the most unwilling Acting Grand Sage, and one of the saviors of the Dendro Archon, has not been there since the whole hubbub died down, and it’s been months.
On day 14, you run into the traveler who seems to be making her rounds of saying goodbye to various citizens. Alhaitham had spoken a number of times about her and her travels and you knew her next destination was Fontaine. Not far from home, but far enough away to rid yourself of all these ugly, human emotions and get over this huge crush on the aforementioned man. With unfounded confidence, you call for her attention with shaky breaths.
“Can I help you?” She questions softly, not missing the clear distress in your body.
“My name is Y/N and, um, I’m a scholar at the Akademiya. Though I guess my attire gave that away,” you laugh nervously, gesturing to said clothing. “I’m, uh, an acquaintance, I guess, of Haitham’s? Anyways, that’s not really important, but you’re going to Fontaine, right?”
Lumine nods and stays silent.
Well, here goes nothing. “This might sound really weird but…can I come with you?”
Perfect, golden eyebrows rise in surprise – it’s not everyday a mere stranger so brazenly asks to travel with her, especially to another nation.
“I have some research that is taking me there, but I’d prefer not to travel alone. I was going to leave soon, but just now when I heard you telling people goodbye, I thought I’d try to ask? I’ll pay for your help, and I can even help you find and cook food! Hopefully you don’t find a Vision-less person like me a burden but I promise I won’t get in the way.”
Lumine looks you up and down once more while her thoughts process. You look harmless and it wouldn’t be a bad idea to have another set of hands along the way. Fontaine really wasn’t that far away once they crossed the border. It was becoming clearer to her that you truly did need to get to Fontaine, and not just for research. Perhaps –
“Could it be that you’re running from something?” She asks with curiosity.
“...wow, nothing really gets past you. It’s more like…someone,” you confess, sheepish and embarrassed.
“Are you in danger?”
“Not at all, no!” With hands waving in front of you, you speak with clear denial. “I’m trying to figure some things out and, well, I’d rather do it when I’m not constantly at risk of bumping into him.”
“Clearly I don’t know the details of your situation but…wouldn’t it be better to just be honest with him?”
You take a glance in the direction of the Akademiya and allow a bittersweet smile to grace your lips. “I think my honesty would simply be a burden for him.”
“And you know that because…?”
“Because he is that kind of man. There is no need for him to have a place for me in his heart. But I’m really bringing the mood down – could you please consider my offer? I forgot to mention I can be quite handy with a dagger if need be.”
Lumine and Paimon exchange a look, the fairy shrugging. “We leave tomorrow at first light,” the traveler speaks up. “Is that enough time for you to gather everything you need? If not, as long as we leave by midday, we don’t mind waiting.”
Perfect.
“It’s more than enough time. I pack light anyways.”
“We’ll meet in front of the Sanctuary then. Paimon and I need to meet with Lord Kusanali before we depart.”
You barely get any sleep that night, a ball of nerves and excitement. Your neighbor has been kind enough to hold your spare key to check in on your apartment every once in a while, waving you off when you begin to discuss forms of repayment for their generosity. The last time you ventured out of the main city and its surrounding areas was perhaps a few years ago to get a look at the famed Palace of Alcazarzaray. Alhaitham had briefly spoken of Kaveh a few times, though his tone was an odd amalgamation of genuine respect and scathing admonishment. In fact, you met the architect once when he came to the Akademiya to ask (more like loudly demand) for a copy of their house key. That was one of your first deep dives into how much of a teasing asshole Alhaitham could be, and you had already been spending most of your hours with him.
Fontaine has only ever been presented to you in sketches and paintings, so for a chance to see it in person…you can’t wait.
When your alarm goes off, you practically jump out of bed, throwing on your travel attire that you had set out the night before. With your research materials in a bag and travel essentials in another, you give one last look at your apartment. Who knows when you’ll be back?
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ghostybaby000 · 5 months
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He found you. Again. | Part 3
part 1 part 2 part 4
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Paring: Simon Ghost Riley x reader
Summary: I suggest going back to part one to really understand this plot! There’s a link above
Warnings: 18+,blood, violence, stabbing, guns, stalker, symptoms of panic
Word count: 1.5k
(Not fully edited, apologies for any incorrect information!)
Although it sounded foolish you had flashbacks to watching your investigative shows. The shows where situations like this happened in almost every episode, and thats what it should be- just an episode on the T.V. not something that you should be enduring why, why did this have to happe-
‘Are you listening to me Y/N? I came this far for you, don’t you see!’ He had stopped pacing, he was now staring you down, when he finally took a second to see what you held. 
He let out a small laugh, and then his expression turned to stone.
‘Why do you have that Y/N, you don’t need that-you wouldn’t hurt me. The lamp, I can forgive because maybe you didn’t know it was me but, now you do, you can see it’s me and I…’
His voice trailed off, and all you saw was his anger boiling over when he reached to his side leading his hand to rest on a gun.
‘Drop the wrench Y/N. Drop it NOW and I won’t have to hurt you, I would never want to hurt you y-you just need to see that- so go on and drop the wrench….’
He unholsters the gun, shaking and holding it in his hand to his side. He has tears welting up in his eyes and you decide to try and coarse him, as the panic surges inside you and you aren’t quite sure that you can even move. You think back on the shows where you are meant to play into their mind games, and not fight it as it usually didn’t end well. You slowly lower yourself to the floor, forcing your fingers to each let go of your only weapon as you exercise your acting skills.
‘You’re right. You wouldn’t hurt me, never…Y-You’ve looked out for me for so long an-
‘Don’t be sarcastic with me. It isn’t funny and it doesn’t work-‘ The gun now knocking on his bouncing leg, you can see his white knuckles gripping it tighter now as he stands there waiting for your response shifting his weight.
‘I’m not being sarcastic, I’ve known you for so long and you were there that night at my house-‘ You start to take a small step towards him, when he backs away.
‘Don’t play games with me Y/N- I-I’m not in the mood for you to be messing with me- I’ve finally gotten you here all to myself I don’t want to lose it.’ He’s moving the gun between his hands when he moves towards you, making you step back.
‘You really are afraid…you-you don’t see it…you don’t get why I was at your house’ He begins to be refilled again with anger and he’s speaking so loud now he’s spitting at you.
‘You don’t see the struggles I’ve gone through to get to you, you don’t know the years I spent in training and trying to find you. I just wanted to be with you again why WHY don’t you see that!?’ He stops for a moment now only about a foot away from you, you can smell him- a smell that reeks of sweat and desperation. He moves closer to you, staring into your eyes you look away towards anywhere but him furrowing your brows in fear, wrong move. The cold metal of the gun now pushing your head back up to meet his gaze.
‘I want to have you with me, whenever and wherever.’ He was now staring through your sole, and that’s when you saw him. 
In your peripheral vision you saw Ghost, his mask making his identity obvious, a wave of relief waiting now to wash over you. He was inside the door and making his away behind the kitchen, moving the small table out of the way. The same table you now realize would have been in your way had you tried to run for the door. You couldn’t bear to look, knowing that he would probably spin to see what you were looking at and it would only become worse.  Ghost disappeared into another portion of the room behind a wall that couldn’t be seen so you made your move.
You tore from his gaze with the gun to your head, looking at where the front door was. He leans in closer to you, the gun still a dangerous distance from your head as he speaks. 
‘That means, Y/N- that you aren’t leaving. You can’t, it’s so SO simple how do you not understand this, me, why I’m here now for YOU.’ He grabs you by the throat with his free hand just strong enough so that you could tell he was deciding whether to strangle you or not, until you just about pass out. He forces you upright, moving your face to look at him him as he slightly loosened his grip.
‘Do you understand?’ You nodded your head as vigorously as you can while still being held tightly, tears welting in your eyes. Your hands were wrapped around his now, trying to prevent it from further strangling your neck.
‘Say it, say you understand me.’ His stare piercing through you now.
‘Yes, yes I understand you’ You manage to squeak out, hoping that he doesn’t hurt you and will let you go if you play along.
‘Good.’  His grip loosens as you let out a few coughs to clear your throat. He hesitates before letting you entirely go, and decides to hold your upper arm so you couldn’t flee.
‘Now let’s get to bed- I didn’t want to come this late into the night, but it was the only way I could be sure you were alone. It’s late and you have work tomorrow…go- move…’
 You were almost sick then knowing that he had so much information about you, when you had been so careful. You hadn’t seen any sight of Ghost, and thought for a moment that it may have been your imagination trying to tell you that you were saved, still stuck in fight or flight mode you couldn’t muster the urge to speak, and instead mumbled a small ‘Mmhmm’
He walked behind you, not letting go of your arm and leading you to your room, the gun still in his other hand. You try to think about what you can do to get away, maybe once he’s asleep you’ll be able to leave. Maybe you can try to seduce him and then knee him and flee, maybe you had a good enough weapon in the room but when would you find time to get it? 
He’s made the way to the door now closed, that leads to your bedroom. He didn’t notice that it wasn’t closed before and decides to reach past you to open it. Your room was already dark, having not turned on any lights you notice the rampage that had torn your room apart. Standing in the door frame you saw the closet was a mess and there were things all over the floor. You crept towards the bed, just getting out of his arms when it all happens. It feels like milliseconds to you, but in real time it lasted a few minutes. 
Within a second the attacker had been outmatched. Ghost made his way directly behind him, and was pulling him backwards and down to the floor in a headlock. He had been in many hand-to-hand combats with men his own size or larger and given he usually had a gun, he had to make it more personal this time. The gun shot out making you shriek out and scurry towards the closet, your hearing ringing due to being in such a confined space. The attacker now choking and stammering backwards the gun cast aside to free his other hand, clawing at Ghosts arms to be let go of. There was a struggle you heard as boots stomped in the hall and hands were hitting the walls, groans and other noises flooded your still sensitive and ringing ears.
You could tell it wasn’t an easy fight, not that any ever was between two stronger men of similar height, Ghost being slightly taller and you hoped stronger-you peered out in the hall with baited breath. To your satisfaction, Ghost was now on top of the attacker in the office space down the hall, pummeling him with his gloved hands relentlessly. You made a quick inhale and retreat around the corner you were peering from which was enough to distract him from his beatings and slowly back off the man. You backed away further into the bedroom, watching as Ghost paused to checked the man wasn’t moving and then walked towards you. 
You were relieved to have the one attacker off of you, but upon seeing his merciless beating you now also felt nervous to be in his wake. You reach the wall on the other side of your room as he makes his way through the door frame. You started to close your eyes not telling If you were afraid now of him, or of being on the verge of breaking down worse than ever. Within a few seconds he had made his way across the room, his boots giving his location away for being a few feet in front of you.
‘c’mon’ His low accented voice allowed you to exhale. 
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EDIT: I have received several new pieces of information that I'm distributing throughout the doc that further reinforces my stance on this, and is valuable to know. Also, I have sections where I'm more clear on my stance after thinking on it for a while and following more discussions on this. I hope I don't disappoint anyone with my thoughts.
If any part of what I've written here resonated with you, I shamelessly ask that you spread it in your preferred manner, and if you feel there's parts that need work please let me know.
Still gonna regret writing this, I'm sure.
[Warning: Long. Like, really.]
Because of all the shit happening with Arknights, PM is under fire once again as it ties into the larger narrative surrounding Korea and its full on gender war (a real thing that's apparently happening).
For those who don't know, way back in July Limbus Company got the event for 4.5 that included swimsuit versions of Ishmael and Sinclair. The fact that Ishmael was in a full bodysuit while Sinclair was shirtless with a collar led the Korean equivalent of 4chan to accuse PM's lead illustrator of being a feminist, which I guess is a bad thing if you're drowning in Korean culture war bullshit.
Turns out the lead illustrator was a man so they pivoted to the CG artist Vellmori and invented a whole host of bullshit links between her and an extremist group to try and get her fired.
And in accordance with their wishes PM fired her. Except they didn't. Probably?
Most everything known from this point onwards is, bluntly, tainted. It's a lot of machine translated Korean posts or, one way or the other, hasty conclusions from people with agendas (including me, no one is immune to propaganda).
Did Vellmori reach out to a newspaper to whistleblow on PM's flagrant disregard for worker's rights? That was the story at first but follow-ups implied it might be a complete fabrication or an overstatement of her grievances (EDIT, I have received information that while there was a phonecall to Vellmori from PM, it was to set up a meeting to properly hash out next steps and any claims she was fired over the phone are incorrect, and the newspaper that reported as such quietly retracted that statement).
Did a labor union jump the gun on spreading this story to gain political capital without reaching out to PM for their side of the story? Maybe if PM's version of events is true, but that's assuming a lot of malice of an institution doing it's best (EDIT, I have received information that the people directly responsible for handling the PM issue acted independently and were later found in violation of several union laws, including allegations involving CP that I do not want to and will not get into).
PM's story is that once the harassment flared up and involved physical visits to the development office, Vellmori wanted to quit. (EDIT, I have received information that the wording of the various statements can be interpreted as Vellmori leaving of her own volition but also under encouragement; if you see claims that she was forced to resign this is what that claim references.) There was a rumor about her getting 2 years of severance pay, but I don't know if that was ever corroborated and is likely false, but she would have gotten something in accordance with Korean Law which they were found in compliance of.
Everything after announcing her termination of contract (not translating the initial announcement, framing it as a company policy issue, keeping quiet on it for months, constant vague threats of lawsuits) was supposedly a bad attempt at trying to quell the harassment by making it go away. Instead, it exploded, and now if you're a fan you'll have to deal with this coming up forever. I know there's fans who follow me that'll resent me for making this post as they just want to move on (or think I'm wrong or misrepresenting some details).
I resent making this for what its worth, and am trying my best to be accurate, but for me this is part of moving on, acknowledging the bad and the factors that mitigate it. And yes, I think there are several mitigating factors.
Why did Cassie Wei, lead singer of Project Mili who is both Korean and a woman, speak out in KJH's defense?
Why hasn't, to my knowledge, Vellmori said anything since and by and large just disappeared if she was so poorly mistreated?
Why have, again to my knowledge, none of the Voice Actors and Actresses spoken out against PM in solidarity?
Why do PM continue to have partnerships with progressive companies like Arc System Works?
Why did the labor union retract their statements against PM and apologize following an actual investigation?
EDIT: New info. Why did the labor union censure the people responsible for handling the PM issue, who later quit the group seemingly in disgrace?
Why did PM not bring their own lawyers to the meeting with Vellmori while she was allegedly encouraged to bring hers?
None of these questions completely absolve PM of wrongdoing, if you were set on condemning them it's not hard to interpret each in a very uncharitable way. For example, most of this is easily answered by the fact we live under Capitalism and we inevitably all have to swallow our morals and ideals to make rent. I could retort that maybe PM did the same by capitulating in any degree to harassment (which they have done historically as what happened with Ruina's ending) and not specifically endorsing any ideology or political belief (which is wild considering the actual content of their stories). But I think that ends with a circular argument that boils down to whether you believe in PM or not.
To be clear, even if you want to interpret all the Vellmori stuff as charitably as possible, PM undeniably fucked up and has labor issues in its history. The artist for the manga Leviathan, Monggeu, came out during the whole thing to speak on her treatment as a contractor; how she was given an impossible workload and the company denied her requests for delays, delays caused in part by suicidal depression caused by the workload. Though KJH personally apologized to her, she was let go over the phone and spoke out only after she felt the company now had a pattern of abusive work policies. The author of Wonderlab also deleted her stuff in solidarity.
That's all bad. Really bad. I stopped playing Limbus because I felt extreme disappointment with the company and managerial tendencies of KJH. Credit to a reddit user I won't name for pointing this out, but this information is far more concrete than anything involving Vellmori as Monggeu broke her silence independently months after things happened on her personal Twitter. However, there isn't nearly as much focus on this or calls for Justice for Monggeu.
This opinion is mine and mine alone, but her situation, which I must stress was awful and shameful on PM's and KJH's part, doesn't tie into a culture war like "Vellmori being fired for feminist tweets" does. It is a clear cut example of bad labor and managerial practices that lead to harm towards an employee, but its an everyday tragedy, not a martyrdom. And so I wonder how much the treatment of labor is actually part of this discussion, the more actionable issue than changing all of Korean society. I wonder if PM's supposed kowtowing to incels is highlighted above all other context because it casts PM as an enemy in a culture war.
I say the above because I've seen online culture war stuff happen before, and it scares me beyond just whether a company I like gets redeemed in the eyes of others. I have seen lives destroyed in the name of a just cause for nothing, including good progressive causes like feminism. If the only thing that would satisfy or lead to forgiveness is a revolutionary purge, do you actually want to build anything?
I digress, and I hope I didn't turn you off too much with my thoughts and fears there. It's important though, because there was ultimately an apology from PM.
In it, among other things, they laid out their flawed logic on how they wanted to handle the situation, addressed their treatment of both current employees and past contractors, and promised to improve and protect employees better. Since then, things seem to have changed at least from an outsiders' perspective. The game moved away from a strict list of deadlines and towards a more open-ended dev pipeline. The game is less buggy than it used to be after updates. They changed policies on content to make it easier to produce by limiting VA without any blowback from their VA's so we can assume proper talks were had. Translations don't have as many errors as they used to while the quality has been maintained even after losing a major translator (which is its own tale of baffling choices by the company in its own right). And they've kept all this up for Season 3 so far without any announcements of delays and, in fact, far more content than usual. All of this, to me, points to better management.
Maybe I'm naive to think so but I want to believe that the evidence points to the crimes of PM not coming from a place of malice and antifeminism but incompetence. I need to stress KJH didn't kill or rape anybody, nor was he verbally or physically abusive. He was a really shitty boss, and I understand how much it sucks to have a shitty boss, believe me. But a shitty boss can become not shitty, and my hope is that happened already, and that a company that produces good art that's worthwhile will thrive as a result.
I say all this because I actually care about this company and art it produces. If I didn't, last July wouldn't have hurt so much. If I'm cringe for it, so be it, but I believe constructive change should be recognized and rewarded, and it's for those reasons I came back after following the game for the rest of its second season.
To be clear, you don't owe a company your time or your money even if they improve their culture and policies, and if you felt that what PM or KJH has done is unforgivable you are well within your rights not to engage with it ever again or even tell others about your grievances, as much as I might disagree. But if you want them to suffer, to lose business, maybe even to go under despite how many other women work for and with them... I don't know. Please don't just think of these people as enemy units in the war against feminism? Ask yourself that if Vellmori broke her silence tomorrow and asserted she left of her own volition and condemned groups like the PMUA, would you believe her or immediately assume she's under duress?
This is not a cut and dry, black and white moral issue where a great evil needs vanquishing, it's a messy as hell moral and labor issue involving multiple people wrapped up in larger cultural and social issues no one initially involved intended. There are real people involved who stand to get hurt, not to mention who's been hurt already. Justice can involve other things than a firing squad. Please at least acknowledge that much. inb4 "No and kindly die"
EDIT, regarding the lawsuits. If you didn't know, PM is currently suing the labor union and a separate organization once called the PMUA (Project Moon Users Association) now called the KGA (Korean Gamer Association). I have seen unconfirmed reports that the former has ties to the disgraced Korean Ratings Board exposed by Blue Archive Fans for crypto bullshit. In addition, I have seen criticisms of how the PMUA used donations and their effectiveness in actual addressing PM and its labor issues, including demonstrations on days workers and management weren't even present and being the ones responsible for leaking documents that Vellmori allegedly wanted to be kept private. All of that supports PM's allegations that these organizations were in fact targeting them as part of political ploys and they never cared about any of the victims or ideals they touted as representing. For all the above, PM is suing for defamation, which is well within their rights by my reckoning. Regardless of my thoughts, this is where we are now.
Last and by no means least, feminism is good. Wanna be clear on that, I believe in equal pay, reproductive rights, that grip strength is a stupid metric to measure human rights by, that men are not owed sex and love by women regardless of circumstance, the whole shebang.
Also, what's happening in South Korea is scary and serious and bigger than just a terminally online culture war shitfest, more like an active bomb about to explode. I support the women who live there and their fight for equality, I just don't think PM fundamentally has anything to do with it and constantly trying to drag it into the line of fire feels like faux activism. I think the scope of the gender war is very far beyond the limits of gacha game discussion, or for that matter the actions of a single company of, like, 50 people.
(I swear to god if Vellmori makes a post tomorrow accusing KJH of SA or something after I wrote all this I will throw myself into the ocean.)
This will actually be the last time I talk about this unless something changes, I want to believe I was respectful the whole time and don't mean to belittle anyone for their beliefs or choices (unless you're an incel, please be better, also take a shower).
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kaylinalexanderbooks · 4 months
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Writeblr intro post
So yeah when I first came here I didn't know this was a thing so I've been working on this in the background. Now that it won the poll, I'm making it now!
I'm going to edit this post as I go so it has more links as I make posts about my WIPs!
About Me
Hi. Call me Kaylin. It's a pen name but I like it. (Some people are just finding out this isn't my real name and y'all should've read the bio)
I'm an education major and do writing on the side and it's a huge passion of mine (hence why I want to teach literacy)
Asexual demiromantic sapphic (she/her) currently in a relationship - (I am comfortable within reason to talk about my experiences)
Love ask games and tag games and generally interacting with others
Love reblogging mutuals' writing talking about WIPs!
21+ but my WIPs are YA - I don't usually reblog anything with a mature community label (sorry in advance for mutuals who do), but when I do I mark it 18+ and I try to label content warnings (LET ME KNOW IF I MISSED SOMETHING)
I'm an educator by heart so I love giving feedback, know a lot about kids, and of course education psychology and theory
I have minor scoliosis, early start of arthritis in my hands, and chronic headaches and migraines attacks in control with medication if anyone needs to ask me about these experiences for writing purposes. I also occasionally use a cane due to knee pain from an injury.
I have an ultimate get to know me game if you want to check that out
My asks are always open! Feel free to stop in whenever you want!
My WIPs
The Secret Portal
See linked intro post for more detail!
YA sci-fi/fantasy
Planned to be a five book series
Quick version: A bunch of adolescents discover a portal to a dimension populated by people with powers. There's also a war. Yayyy.
The first installment is currently in the process of being read by beta readers. Apply to be one here!
One to five game
Q&A (open at any time!)
Tagged as #the secret portal, #tsp, or #teaspoon if you want to give it a nickname. #tsp updates and #tsp excerpt are used as well. All characters get their own tag and #alium will be used when talking about my world building
Ask to be added to or removed from the tag list! @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites
@nebula--nix @literarynecromancy @honeybewrites @the-golden-comet
School of the Legends
See linked intro post for more detail!
YA urban fantasy fairy tale retelling
International school for people with gifts (born with), majicks (learn), and curses (given).
Currently in planning stage but five chapters have been written.
One to five game
Tagged as #school of the legends and #sotl. Also use #sotl updates and #sotl excerpt, though not as often as TSP
Ask to be added to or removed from the tag list! @illarian-rambling @katwritesshit @wyked-ao3
I have a WIP questionnaire I have gone for BOTH TSP and SOTL!
Other Ideas
It Was All Just a Dream - (linked WIP questionnaire) high school senior gets an entire redemption arc via vivid dream
The Emerald of Secrets - temporary title for vague fairy fantasy idea
Perspectives - we watch the same event five times in a row from different perspectives
Eternity - temporary title for a supernatural detective story
The Others - temporary title for a sci-fi apocalypse story
There are more but these are the main ones
What I Post or Reblog
Updates on my writing
Tag games and ask games! I love them dearly but it may take a bit to reply! I have a lot piled up and not all of them are simple. But I will get to them!!
Writing from others
Writing advice
Beta requests, book announcements, and intro posts to help boost!
I try to keep things positive! If I see a negative post about writing I'll usually reblog it with some positive spin. Sorry if that's annoying but it makes me sad that people aren't happy about writing.
I always try to include image IDs to make my blog accessible - if something is incorrect or you have any suggestions for making IDs better let me know!
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charliemwrites · 10 months
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Extended Keeper/Kept Universe
(Separated by Keeper; Updated 12/4/23; let me know if any parts or links are missing/incorrect)
Johnny's Shy Thing:
Johnny's Shy Thing (intro); Thoughts Shy Thing getting nabbed Going down (nsfw; NEW) Shy Thing's first time (nsfw) Shy Thing's first day; More Thoughts (tm); Johnny pushes First movie night Shy Thing's sneaky kisses Johnny smokes Sad Shy Thing Shy Thing and Johnny sleep together (not spicy) Shy Thing's first ~spice (nsfw); Going down (nsfw) Bath Time for Shy Thing Discipline for Shy Thing Drawing Shy Thing; Self-Conscious Hobbies A Shy Thing in the forest; Running away; Aftermath Johnny is injured Johnny snaps at the baby Johnny with the red mask; Shy Thing wears the mask Spice with the red mask (nsfw) Explosions Shy Thing gets mad; aftermath (NEW) Shy Thing and Price (nsfw) Cameras and self-care (nsfw; NEW) Period (NEW)
Price's Good Girl:
Price is a trainer Good Girl's first day; Early days Good Girl hesitates Sick Good Girl Good girl and Price sleeping Together (not spicy) Good Girl's first time (nsfw); Price is a dom Good Girl + oral (nsfw) Thoughts about Good Girl Discipline for Good Girl; Aftercare; Drabble (nsfw) Good Girl's crates Edging (nsfw) Under Price's desk Period (nsfw) Price gets mad Depressive episode Daddy (nsfw; NEW) Holiday (NEW) Nightmare (NEW)
Others:
Rudy's (solo) (NEW) Alejandro's (solo) (nsfw; NEW) AleRudy's shared pet + Valeria (NEW)
Pairs/Trios/+ Gaz:
Autistic Shy Thing and Good Girl Feral, Shy Thing, and Good Girl meet Feral, Shy Thing, and Good Girl play with their keepers Good Girl gets babysat by Simon Simon babysits Shy Thing Shy Thing likes Price Price babysits Feral with Good Girl; Aftermath; Aftermath pt.2 Feral is a bad influence on Good Girl (semi-nsfw) Feral is a bad influence on Shy Thing Gaz babysits all 3 creatures; Johnny babysits all 3 Bring your pet to work day Halloween Drunk Girls Chores Clumsy pets "You don't love me" What do you have? A knife! Gaz as a kept creature; Thoughts(tm) Traveling Different kind of kisses Emotional support items Dangerous Sports Pet names for keepers Dissociating First kisses Keepers' scents (NEW) "I like you" (NEW); "I love you" (NEW) Jealousy (NEW) Good luck charms (NEW) Act of care (NEW) Anniversary (NEW) "What if I never love you back" (NEW) Weighted blanket (NEW) Bored (NEW)
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tapestryoftrauma · 6 days
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Hello Pulp Musicals Fandom!
So, as you may have noticed, we have zero tags wrangled in our AO3 tag right now. Not only is this frustrating for filtering purposes, but it also means tagging your own fics with incorrect or missing tags is very common.
Therefore, I have been working on creating a master document that contains all the tags you'll need, and extras we can add for wrangling sake too.
You can find the link to that document at the bottom of this post. However, please keep in mind this is still being updated, and I am open to requests for additional tags to be added to this growing document. So, if you have a request, go ahead and either drop me a comment under this post, or feel free to DM me about it and I'll review it and let you know if I decide to add it.
Otherwise, I suggest you use this document for a guide when posting future fics, and also portentously consider going back and updating older fics with these uniform tags as well.
In this document you will also see a guide as to why certain tags are formatted certain ways, which tags are mandatory, and which tags are optional. My comments and DMs are also open for questions about any of those too.
Here you go, go wild!
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Introducing: The Index
For a while now, I’ve been really bothered by how unhelpful the tumblr search function can be when trying to find specific pokémon posts I’ve done. So, I figured, what better solution is there than to spend WAAAAY too much time compiling a google document with links to every post? So here it is, the big thing I’ve been working on! This document has a link to all of my posts, sorted into the national pokédex, the regional pokédexes, and the 18 pokémon types. It also includes links to other types of posts, like evolution line spotlights and yearly top-10s. As I make more and more posts, they will be added to the document so that it stays up to date. If you come across any issues with it (and I’m sure there are, as there’s plenty of room for error with something like this), like misspellings, incorrect pokédex numbers, etc, please feel free to let me know in the comments on either this post or my pinned one (where the link to the doc will also be found). Anyway, it’s perhaps not super flashy, but it took a long time to make so I hope you find it useful if you enjoy the blog! Thanks for your patience!
Link to the Index: https://docs.google.com/document/d/18I0JUJfxdauxPZNfIeQbsLFA2imSoiqMKi08mOaxmec/edit
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[Oh, and since I don’t know how to share a google doc anonymously, this whole thing is a name reveal. Hi, I’m Jackson (he/him) :) ]
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darkserenity24 · 5 months
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Freedom and Chaos
《 Loki x Reader Fic 》
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: ̗̀➛ 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘵 2 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘍𝘳𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘰𝘮 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘍𝘰𝘳𝘨𝘪𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘦𝘴𝘴 𝘚𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴
𝘚𝘶𝘮𝘮𝘢𝘳𝘺: 𝘛𝘩𝘦 𝘎𝘰𝘥 𝘰𝘧 𝘔𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘩𝘪𝘦𝘧 𝘥𝘪𝘴𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘴𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘱𝘶𝘳𝘱𝘰𝘴𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘺𝘰𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘪𝘮𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧, 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘸𝘩𝘦𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘯𝘦𝘸𝘧𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘪𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘴𝘱𝘪𝘳𝘢𝘭𝘴 𝘰𝘶𝘵 𝘰𝘧 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘭, 𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘰𝘴 𝘦𝘯𝘴𝘶𝘦𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘮𝘶𝘤𝘩 𝘮𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘸𝘪𝘴𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘪𝘴 𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘮𝘦𝘥.
𝘚𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘴: 𝘗𝘢𝘳𝘵 2 (𝘐𝘯 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘴)
𝘊𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴: 7/?
𝘞𝘰𝘳𝘥 𝘊𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵: 29.5𝘒 +
𝙒𝙖𝙧𝙣𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨: 𝘿𝙖𝙧𝙠! 𝙇𝙤𝙠𝙞, 𝙋𝙤𝙨𝙨𝙚𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙫𝙚 𝘽𝙚𝙝𝙖𝙫𝙞𝙤𝙧, 𝙑𝙞𝙤𝙡𝙚𝙣𝙘𝙚, 𝙚𝙫𝙚𝙣𝙩𝙪𝙖𝙡 𝙎𝙢𝙪𝙩 (𝙖𝙣𝙙 𝙡𝙤𝙩𝙨 𝙤𝙛 𝙛𝙡𝙪𝙛𝙛!), 𝙚𝙩𝙘.
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Chapter 1 🌹
Chapter 2 🌙 ☀️
Chapter 3 💤
Chapter 4 🏙️
Chapter 5
Chapter 6 🃏
Chapter 7
Chapter 8 - Coming Soon
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DarkSerenity's Masterlist
✦AO3 is the only other platform I cross-post on: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DarkSerenity24/profile
✦Please let me know if any links are incorrect or not working.
✦If you enjoy my work, please consider supporting me on Ko-fi ✨ : https://ko-fi.com/darkserenity24
✦Banner created by me!
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hockey-fics · 7 months
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Masterlist
Updated as of: March 6, 2024. Please let me know if any of the links don't work/are incorrect.
(Listed in alphabetical order by first name)
Colton Parayko
Neighbours
My Forever
Brock Boeser
Is There an Us?
Not Overstepping
Rather Forgive You Than Lose You
A Perfect Celebration
Next Summer
Jack Hughes
Gin, Tonic, and Tequila Shots
Something About Red Wine
Jamie Oleksiak
Two Too Many
Broken Promises and Forbidden Relationships
Jeff Skinner
Seeing Other People
Joel Farabee
Three Wishes
Josh Anderson
Like Having You Here
The Magic of Weddings
Kevin Hayes
Crossing Paths
A Long Month Alone, Together
Still Regret It
Mathew Barzal
Missing Piece
Matthew Tkachuk
Hockey Players are Bad News
Does He Know
Always You
Me or Him
One Drunk Night
Then Everything Changed
One Big Charade
Nathan MacKinnon
When We're 25
Nico Hischier
A Love Worth Changing For
Nolan Patrick
Swipe Right
Hot Chocolate and First Kisses
Rather Be in Philadelphia
Final Sumer at the Cabin
Travis Konecny
Prove You Wrong
Do Better
Trevor Zegras
Hard to Forget
Quinn Hughes
No Flirting at Trivia
That Night in Michigan
That Week in Vancouver (pt. 2 of That Night in Michigan)
Rose Coloured Glasses
The Summer It All Changed
Vince Dunn
Just Once | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four |
Not Enough
Fresh Start and a Familiar Face
Perfect Night
Should Have Seen it Sooner
Sick of It
Instagram Official
Misc:
Andre Burakovsky and Tyson Jost
Soy Lattes and Red Wine | Part One | Part Two | Part Three | Part Four | Choose Your Ending: Tyson Jost | Andre Burakovsky
Nathan MacKinnon and Tyson Jost
Couples Trip
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janmisali · 1 year
Note
Hi Mitch,
My name is Joey and I'm a PhD candidate in linguistics at the University of Arizona with focus in semantics. I really like your video on /hj. Like, really really like it. So much so that I am currently planning to write a pre-dissertation prelim investigating the semantics and pragmatics of half-joking from a formal perspective (using scoreboard theory, if you're hip). I think I've got some really cool insights that both you and the academic publishing circuit might want to hear.
My question is this: I understand you're cool with derivative works given proper citation. But when it comes to citing you, how would you prefer I do it? I could be minimal, saying "Inspired by [this video](link)," or just put you in the acknowledgements. My ideal attribution, though, would be to go more in-depth, giving a little bio description of you as a youtuber with an interest linguistics and a [insert degree? in linguistics here]. I also wanted to ask if it was ok if I framed your video from the neuroatypical angle-- "misali, an autistic creator describes their frustration with interpreting half-joking statements and gives several semantic definitions . . . etc." I feel that it could be meaningful to attribute such deep pragmatic introspection to a unique neuroatypical perspective.
Just to be upfront, I will be problematizing your definitions given, but it's much more of a yes-and then a well, actually. Very academic. I also will of course give you advanced access before it's submitted for publication or even review.
Please do let me know. You can either respond here or at my professional email [email protected].
Thanks for your time,
-Joey
oh, you have my enthusiastic support to do this. this is a wonderful idea
to answer your specific question, a standard academic citation would be sufficient of course ("Misali, jan" is technically incorrect but so funny that I endorse formatting it this way regardless), but if you also want to include a bio then, one, I have no formal linguistics education or degree of any kind, and two, it is appropriate and I'd say very relevant to mention that the video comes from an autistic perspective.
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