#like first of all i think itd be fucking funny for EITHER of them to secretly be festival girlies. i KNOW this isnt canon. i KNOW this.

[geodebiome]

hobbies is drawing jonmartin doing things jonmartin literally would NEVER do, for some reason

[thatdeadaquarius]

Okay so-- i was reading some sagau posts and came across this one where the reader was an army vet and my brain just Did Its Thing--

So now I'm here to inflict this on to you--

Would guns be considered as catalysts. And would they only do Phys Damage.

Me reading this ask:

😶 😐 🤨 🧐 🧐 😰 🥲 😭😭😭 💀

STOP YOU'VE INFLICTED ME WITH PSYCHOLOGICAL DMG FROM THIS ASK 😭

(Also srry took so long to respond, when i didnt realize how short this was/was just sitting over here 😓)

^ For the sake of gun imagery being a lot/maybe staff might hate me for it,

we'll put this gay shit instead (i almost mispelled to "gay shot" lmao)

☆

Sun: Army Veteran Reader, Gender neutral Reader (you/they/them)

Orbit: SHORT Headcanons

Stars: everybody bc i think itd be funny

Comets & Meteors: Content Warnings: gun stuff, mild violence, mild cursing & Trigger Warnings: Gun fun everywhere

THIS ASK HAS ME GIGGLING TO MYSELF LIKE A MANIAC

You're out here having a whole gun they let you take for off-base

And u ofc have a license so u can conceal carry

(idk how non-american gun laws work, but tbh ours are so fucked idk how they work here either, just that an army guy i knew once could have his gun when he got back home)

And ofc ur just paranoid enough (more like it just makes u feel safe)

That when u get yoinked into a portal to a silly little brightly colored gacha game fantasy world, the gun comes with 💀

Id like to add in my silly little "ur in a video game, so video game rules" AU version of genshin so:

The only other gun (ish) wielder (Mika) has unlimited bolts

Sooo I'd think your gun would be the same jfc lol

NO BC YOUD SCARE THE ACTUAL SHIT OUT OF EVERYONE IN UR VICINITY IN A BATTLE

BC GUNSHOTS ARE A DIFFERENT TYPE OF LOUD

When u first stumble into abyss monsters/hostile creatures of the realm, u nearly scare off a Lawlachurl bc every shot's like thunder to these bitches😭

So not only the monsters but the vision holders think u fucking summoned lightning

OMG THE BULLETS ARE SO FAST THEYD PROBABLY NOT SEE IT

ESP BC DISTRACTED BY GUNSHOT LOUDNESS

SO U AIM THIS LITTLE BLACK CROSSBOW (???) AND THINGS JUST DIE (OR GET RIDDLED WITH HOLES) WITH NO CLEAR ARROW STICKING OUT

STOPP- you're becoming a witchy god or smth to all of Teyvat bc it just looks like hella high level magic atp to them LMAOOO

Rumors of you get out of hand and say u just point or snap ur fingers and things get wounded/just die on the spot 💀

Oh another difference between Teyvatians seeing ur gun vs. crossbow (what they know)

Is that guns are wayyyy more destructive

Like an arrow would get shot but it'd bounce off of things like rock or wood or metal, maybe dent a little depending on how close

But a bullet goes thru that shit so easy, and leaves a whole little explosion behind, once again depending on range

(I once saw a Mythbusters episode? of them proving bullets would definitely go thru car doors, like movies lied to u, this is why drive-bys acc work like for gangs)

Lmao, the image of you in like full armor with a Teyvat made automatic gun after showing it to blacksmiths

Makes u just more convincing as a god, esp bc military training

(Ppl like Gorou and Kokomi begging for military tactics/training ur world has done)

...

....Ok.

I'll address it.

But only so u dont think im stupid later.

Yes, the Fatui have guns.

No, this not the same as having a glock LMAO

End of story.

(Also, urs runs on bullets, whereas the Fatui rely on magic/delusions to power theirs, plus they dont seem as fast or destructive as urs, more "explosions aimed at you" than real bullets)

Which,,, u leave the managing of ppl copying ur gun to ppl like the Qixing or smth, but make sure to give them advice on good gun laws if teyvat accidentally revolutionizes bc of ur advanced gun that anybody can wield (non-vision users)

Thats the best ive got abt that

Oh, also enjoy being praised as a War god now.

:)

☆

... dammit i had smth i was gonna tell u guys-

Uh what tf was it, it was important

OH

Next post is the Eldritch God Oneshot! Look out for it :) !!

☆

Safe Travels Kid,

💀♒️

♡the beloveds♡

@karmawonders / @0rah-s / @randomnatics / @glxssynarvi / @nexylaza / @genshin-impacts-me / @wholesomey-artist / @thedevioussmirk / @the-dumber-scaramouche / @chocogi / @fallen-starr / @areaderofbooks

If you wanna join a taglist, DM me what for! "Pspspsss, please tag me for [All SAGAU posts, Only SAGAU Language AUs, diff fandom, etc.]!"

(If you ever wanna drop, just DM me! "No more taglists/[specifically this AU/fandom] please!")

[dorylinae-supremacy]

Thinking about an AU where Techno, Wilbur and Tommy are all the harbingers of the actual entire apocalypse and Phil (just some insane guy) decides that those are in fact his kids and starts gaslighting the absolute shit out of them about it.

Rambles under cut!

I wanna try something where they're just more insidious and passive killers than anything else, theyre mostly just biding their time and watching as wherever they're lingering around gets sicker and just starts withering away.

They're a slow moving threat that just can't be stopped and for some reason (because Kristin thinks its funny) Phil just isnt affected by them.

Phil: Oh Techno's always been like that ever since he was a baby Techno: I have literally never met you a day in my life Tommy: Idk man... you have always been like that Wilbur: Oh my death he's actually getting to us

Its a mix of that combined with that "how did he know I was a gemini" meme

Phil: Wil! I brought you some salmon, I know how much you love it! Wilbur: How the fuck did you know I like salmon Phil: I'm your dad silly, of course I'd know :-)

I just think itd be super fun since Phil in this au is literally just some insane dude. He literally lies about their entire childhood but does it so consistently and so realistically that it throws them off guard.

I also have a few ideas where they start referring to Phil as their dad in the beginning as a sarcastic / mocking thing but accidentally just getting themselves even more adopted as they do it.

Phil: Wilbur put on a coat Wilbur: I don't need one! Techno: Go on, Wil. Listen to dad Wilbur: Ugh fine. Only because dad wants it, though

Stranger: Whos this? Tommy: Oh thats our dad. He kinda just tags along Stranger: Aww thats so sweet! You got his nose and everything Tommy: I- wh- no he's not actually our da- Phil: I know he did! Isn't he the cutest, spitting image isnt he? Tommy: You're not my dad! Stranger: Oh someones embarrassed! Phil: Yeah he's going through a rebellious phase right now

Just a mixture of things like that where it starts as calling him it but then accidentally actually giving him parental authority along with that.

I also wanna explore how Kristin and Phils relationship would be like. Maybe her as death being very bemused by this silly human that just decided she was his wife one day.

She literally visits him in dreams and stuff and he just acts as if they're married and have been for years. He complains about their 'rambunctious kids' and how he has to threaten them with her so that they behave sometimes. She finds it so silly and just cant help but play pretend.

Kristin: Hello, human Phil: My love! Its been so long since I've seen you Kristin: We've never met Phil: Oh don't say that! It hasnt been that long. I've just been far too occupied with our boys to visit too much Kristin: Our boys? I made them Phil: And they came out beautiful! I'm so glad Wil and Tech got your eyes. I was hoping they would.

I think that'd be a core part of this AU as well. Everyone is playing pretend but then it just fuzzies and it all becomes real for them. At first its a joke that Phil is her husband and their father but then they get lost in the fantasy and fun of it all and actually accept him as such.

Phil has no ulterior motives either, he's literally just a strange insane man that heard stories about neotrio and started thinking they were his kids one day. He genuinely believes his delusion and they end up accidentally making it a reality.

He just makes lucky guesses and plausible lies often enough that he's still shiny and new, he's still fun to play with and thats what ends up 'tricking' them all.

[drifloonz]

hellooo. Can I ask for some dad steven headcannons?

i've been ignoring too many of my requests SOOO yes!! you may :)

dad steven headcanons!!

these are long sorry. or not sorry. whichever works. smile

____

♡ ok first of all. if this man impregnates you or anyone uh. he'll either be really into the idea or really fucking scared. usually a mixture of both. nervous and very anxious excitement.

♡ like he's always wanted children but in the state he's in now, he has always seen it as something unachievable for him nowadays

♡ who's getting pregnant? YOU decide!!!!!

♡ alternatively adoption exists which yeah that works too

♡ presumably, if this is a scenario where he's dating someone either the reader or like someone else, then PRESUMABLY he's gotten his life at least a little back together enough to clean his house a bit and clean Himself up a bit and generally just take care of himself and his surroundings more to be liveable enough for him, you, and presumably a child.

♡ single father steven is also very good. either or. but if he's a single father and a baby just drops in front of his doorstep he would take it but panic really hard ( he may at the dead of night fly to some adoption center and hope to god they take this random child... but he's also deathly scared of bad things happening especially w. waves hands at his whole story. so he might be too overprotective already to do that. )

♡ either way into actual dad hcs

♡ he used to babysit a shitton when he was younger, mostly with red and blue, so he's got the skillset for it. and he's also used to wanting to be a good rolemodel! it's just that these skills are so tucked away after the Depression Spiral that it's hard to get him back, but he definitely tries - for his child.

♡ honest to god if you asked him to name his child he'd either make an entirely new name or, because he's unoriginal and had a whole spiral over it, would name her miki or something very similar if she's a girl.

♡ welcome to the world Cool Charizard ( legal name ) /j

♡ ... it'd also be funny if whenever he has a child its always Girl because . yea. yea. Narrative curse.

♡ either way they basically don't have access to the internet bc i don't think steven even has that shit because he's poor as hell. at most he has phone data somehow that he probably isn't paying for. somehow.

♡ maybe his rent gets paid for him bc he was champion once idfk /j

♡ i thnik people are just too scared to properly enter his house and tell him to pay taxes and or rent he just gets to keep his shitty bigass house for free

♡ also it would be weird considering i think that the entirety of kanto tried to sweep him and his whole situation under the rug BUT THATS UNRELATED. SO!!!

♡ basically his kid is not an ipad baby thank god.

♡ even if his partner has one he's going to be like. vaguely scared of technology and also thinks itd be a really bad idea ( it is ) to just raise their child on that shit. the baby gets one cocomelon video a week /j

♡ thank god he probably still has his tv's that somehow still work so he just will let them watch baby shows in the living room sometimes instead of fucking cocomelon . thatd be horrendous.

♡ sometimes watches kids shows with his kid in his lap or next to him. usually falls asleep pretty quick into doing that

♡ he DOES tuck them in goodnight.. sometimes tells them stories.

♡ steven is really really really really overprotective over his child/ ESPECIALLY if it's like. straight up his child with you or whatever. that was a labor of LOVE!!! this also means he loves them very much but he's very dodgy with them going outside and whatnot. at least without his supervision.

♡ he'll be silly for his child and his child only. he'll make funny faces for them to giggle at and things like that and try to do fun things w his lil baby. etc etc. it's very cute to look at but if you use it against him he's going to glare at you really hard and squint judgementally

♡ honest to god i've said this so often to my friends . steven is ABSOLUTELY the type of guy to accidentally drop his baby while trying to hold them or throw them into the air a little and go "Oh shit. Sorry". brad lisa the painfulcore type dad except like less morally neutral bc his situation isnt the same

♡ lets the baby nap in with him a lot. sometimes you can walk into his bedroom and see him with all of his long ass hair splayed out on the bed and the baby also splayed out on the bed ... stevens gotta get his beautysleep!!! so does his kid!!!

♡ stevens really not sure whether to keep miki ( the charizard ) a secret from his child or not. because he knows that like. miki wouldn't hurt his baby almost definitely but he's still kind of scared of the possibility of either of them hurting one another accidentally or not... so at least until theyre older miki's probably a thing he tries not to mention.

♡ in general he also tries to not talk about himself or his past at all to his kid. he doesn't want them to know the ugly sides of himself.

♡ he just pretends he's a normal guy. if they somehow find out otherwise he'll either sigh deeply and tell them the truth, likely as some sort of life lesson to them ( either on safety, cautiousness, boundaries and trust w the trading incident or 'Hey if this happens to you maybe don't do what i did' but im not sure if he's self-aware enough to think of him as in the wrong entirely in that situation ), or he'll just say "must be a different guy" ( they look exactly the same in photos other than how disgruntled steven is now ... )

♡ he absolutely has a baby carrier. i think he always has wanted to carry a baby like that bc he thinks its all cute and funny. he probably smiles at you when you look at him wearing that with your little googoo in it. it looks so odd on him that it's kind of funny

♡ steven is absolutely a dilf tbqh... imagine dadbod steven NOW.

♡ sorry for sidetracking so much. anyways, he's the type of dude who OVERprepares. like MONTHS in advance, he's already buying a shitton of baby clothes, food, bottles, various furniture, etc. how is he buying these? well. either with your money or he's stealing that shit. or he somehow actually has money now. he might've mugged the various people who try to sneak into his house and 'mysteriously' die. who knows. It's a living! Kind of..????

♡ due to his general aversion of society he's kind of torn over wanting to go to a hospital or just doing it in a tub or something if its a situation where he has a partner. i think ultimately he'd do it in a hospital, despite his fear of people, because he's really scared of something going wrong. he'll wait with like. bated breath. scared as hell.

♡ he will cry the second that baby is in his arms. 100%. trust me. like. silently, probably - at least for the first few seconds. but theres a lot of tears. and a smile.

♡ he hums little lullabies to his baby and will gently move them back and forth... while the babies probably chewing at his hair a little.

♡ also yes he lets the baby play with his hair... his hair is that childs stimtoy ( whatever this means )

♡ s!3v3n is also surprisingly calm and good to the baby. the baby would either be fucking terrified of s!3v3n's face or think its silly and laugh at it. s!3v3n particularly likes to make silly faces where his tongue sticks out real far ( he can just do that when hes like that dw abt it ) and he goes crosseyed

♡ =P =D => <- s!3v3n making silly faces for a baby ( pov )

♡ ok this has all mostly been pregnancy and baby hcs. actual kid hcs uhhh... he probably really wants to homeschool his kid bc hes very overprotective but if you talked him into it he'd reluctantly put them in Actual Public School so they can have like. a social life. lol. bc otherwise theyd be EXTREMELY fucking isolated considering stevens been vanquished to Pallet Town's Shadow Realm ( aka pallet town 'A little to the west guarded by rocks and past the forest' edition ) and steven really doesnt want them to be lonely bc it sucks and hes been isolating himself for most of his life at this point so he knows it sucks

♡ he gets more comfortable going outside. most of kanto has forgotten about him anyways - he just specifically avoids going out to pallet town. if his kid wants to go there and hes not a single dad he'll have his partner do it for him. but he likes to go take walks with them and go to playgrounds. plus, he doesn't even have to whip miki / M' out in the wild grass - pokemon avoid him anyways. lol.

♡ as bittersweet as it is, if his kid wanted to be a pokemon trainer he WOULD have the best tips and tricks on it... he was the undefeated champion and arguably the first ''pokemon master'', whatever that term even means. ( presumably ''trainer champion'' instead of ''probably appointed to be in that position for someone to fight'' champion. like lance. or The Other steven. or smth. )

♡ he'd probably find a way to get his kid a starter... he still lives in kanto and close to pallet town too, so he can pull a silver and like. steal a starter. or he could just send his kid on their way ""without supervision"" ( hes lurking in the forest keeping an eye out just in case ) to ask oak about it

♡ if they pick charmander it is 90x more bittersweet. amen. but i think bulbasaur would be cute too bc its the only starter not picked and not relevant in strangled red + my own personal bulbasaur bias.

♡ although stevens going to tell them not to trade pokemon for obvious reasons - either thru a ''spooky tale'' / urban legend ( that is just his story but he tells it much more vague. like. ''... well i heard sometimes pokemon don't come back out.'' ) or just straight up says some shit like ''yea don't trade pokemon. it's bad.'' without elaborating

♡ regardless. he's still being very overprotective and unless his kid doesnt budge on it hes preferably not letting them go explore the world on their own until theyre like... 13-16

♡ even then. hes usually kind of trailing behind without telling them bc he legitimately has nothing better to do.

♡ ... also if the kid doesnt have a rival , like, no one at school or no one who they meet in their journey, then steven might. like. sigh deeply. get a few pokeballs from god knows where. catch a new team comparable to their kids level range. and be their rival. who is also their dad of mid 20s to early 40s in age. for some reason. people question it but he doesnt care he just wants his kid to have fun

♡ funnier option that i dont think he'd do ( probably ) is he pulls a clavell ( or team rocket ) and acts like a totally different guy when all that changes is his fit and maybe his haircut. except he prob pulls it off well. he'd still be obviously steven but his cap is backwards and his hair is tied up and his little jacket or w/e is around his waist and thats all that changes. his shoes might be untied for the 'stupid kid / teenager' look but then he trips over his feet and ties them bc its not worth the image

♡ alternatively ; its just s!3v3n. thats kind of steven but different right ( JOKING. HE WOULD NOT DO TH

♡ this hypothetical would be way funnier if he regained his entire reputation somehow of being a cool and strong pokemon trainer that he had when he was actually a trainer bc ppl forgot abt champion steven. and hes just like. "Okay. It's a neverending cycle of torment huh." under his breath when his kid cannot hear

♡ if asked for his name in this state hes just like uhh. uhhhhaa,.f uh. uh. stephen... thhhheee. third.

♡ he's probably not doing the thing mike and or blue did where hes the last e4 fight who isnt even an e4 member but is your rival. thats a bit too bittersweet for him. this whole exercise is fun but he doesn't wanna FULLY relive his glory days a year before his awesome trauma spiral. he also may or may not even do the gym leaders for the same reason. hes just a guy who his kid fights sometimes that is classified as a rival by technicality

♡ also yes he still has miki. he always has miki. shes just probably tucked into a bag or smth so ppl dont ask about why he has a cracked fucked up pokeball. she only comes out if his kid is in serious danger and he needs an intimidation tactic, or at worse, a method to quickly harm or kill someone with

♡ eg if a serious evil team situation happened and genuinely harmed his kid or threatened to their asses are not leaving unscathed.

♡ sorry this specific 'fake rival who is also your dad who also used to be the undefeated and first trainer champion of kanto' scenario is extremely fucking funny to me + fun in general. but moving on

♡ type of guy to dress his kid when theyre like a baby who cant think for themself in the stupidest halloween costumes ever. big pumpkin costume. hes about to crack into laughter when he takes a picture of them in it . or a charmander costume . because its steven. ( yes hes in a giant charizard onesie and yes if you make fun of him or his kid hes going to kill you dead

♡ he does go trick or treating w them too. he like. feels normaler on halloween. it was probably one of his favorite holidays even if pallet town was small an he probably got 50% apples and shitty non name brand stuff and 50% actual candy from the neighborhood homes

♡ type of parent whos going to squeeze his kids hand real tight when they get a shot or anything like that

♡ semirelated. hes tall and his hands are big but hes still gunna hold his kids hand everywhere even when theyre older until his kid complains enough ab it being embarrassing.

♡ has to crouch to talk to his fucking kid on eyelevel a lot of the times that his back hurts. like. more than it usually does.

♡ solution; just pick them up and talk to them while they are lifted into the air if theyre ok with it

♡ piggyback rides for his kid. 100000%. hes a piggy back ride type of guy. along with other similar things. would it be called grumpiggyback riding because its pokemon... anyways

♡ i think when his kids older they probably have a lot of inside jokes and steven likes to banter with them a little. playfully. and also likes to make jokes with the most deadpan ass voice bc his kid finds it funny, probably.

♡ stevens never had parents, so being a parent to someone else is... foreign, but also not really? as mentioned he did constantly used to babysit blue and red. and he was overall the teenage childhood role model for many kids in pallet town... but he himself was mostly raised by mike. so. either way, he very much loves kids and taking care of them. so tldr. hes a really good dad.

♡ i have more ideas but if you want any specific dad steven hcs explored jusrt ask me bc i have thoughts on this.

[theaviskullguy]

D&D Obey me- Lucifer, Mammon, + The Twins!

@trash-opposum here you go. seperate post so people can find it but here!

Disclaimer, if i do the rest, im going to avoid making EVERYONE a tiefling or aasimar, those are just for who i think are exceptionally appropriate/is how im playing them as my current dnd character is just Belphegor. If yall want me to make the others (Asmo, Levi, Satan, maybe Diavlo but who knows) let me know!

so let's GOOOOOOOO

Lucifer

Aasimar, the kind from Mordenkainen so no special extra type

Noble background, mainly cause i cant think of anything else

As for class, we have four potential options

Two varieties of Paladin, cleric, or warlock

First paladin variety- Oathbreaker

In this case he was probably originally Devotion before the revolution, and whoops! Oath Broken!

It'd either be a point of pride for him ("I fought for what I believe is right, and there is no shame in that") or he'd hide it from everyone

Second paladin- order of the Crown! obviously because of Diavlo. fellas is it gay to swear undying devotion to your future ki- *gets shot*

Cleric, then Order Domain. clerics are sworn to gods and not demons but shush his patron might still be Diavlo. in an actual D&D setting i can see him instead swearing to like Tyr or something.

he wont be healing. clerics are tanky he's out here ordering people to drop their weapons and then fucking murdering them

Warlock, gotta be fiend patron. im not sure if its possible to be your own patron but itd be funny as shit. worse case its fiend patron with some flavor homebrew as i call it to literally just be a fiend in his own right climbing the infernal ladder as he levels up

i promise the others wont be as long

Mammon

Earth Genasi as those are descended from the Dao, which are the greediest genie. Also, they just look rich with gem-like stuff growing in cracks on their skin you just know Mammon's one of them

Charlatan background. he is scamming people left and right and it works

Rogue, thief subclass. Honestly any subclass other than Arcane Trickster (hes not smart enough) or Scout (hes not equipped for the "outside of civilization" shit)

Unlike for Lucifer, the others have Backstory! Woo!

Mammon is the son of a Dao and a human. His human parent helped him escape from the Elemental Plane of Earth, but then he was left on his own

So. He quickly learned how to con people. At first it was for survival, and then greed.

He found Lucifer while running one of these cons. In particular, his "con" was a vanishing act. He claimed he could become "one with the earth" when really he was curling up on the ground and casting Pass Without Trace. Lucifer saw through this illusion and threatened to out Mammon as a conman, unless he joined him as his ally. So, he did.

Lucifer keeps him in check, but that's not to say Mammon isn't fully on the straight and narrow

Beelzebub

Tiefling!!! variant tiefling favored to have fly wings.

Outlander background, ill explain why in a sec

Barbarian. Need I say More?

actually i will- Totem animal, spirit of the bear. Since bear gets resistance to all damage (other than psychic) while raging and i feel that works with Beel more than anything

now for his backstory! he isnt canon in the campaign im playing belphie in but his backstory has the same catalyst. When he was five years old, the kingdom he lived in was caught in a rebellion against a tyrant. In which, Beel saw his older sister get killed by a royal guard. Belphie was going to be killed- but was protected by a tiefling in a knight's armor (my previous character who was killed. rip avi)

Beel, in his five-year-old mind, just ran. He took off without a second thought- a decision he now regrets deeply.

He ran into the surrounding woodlands. And gets an Atalanta-style backstory. For those who dont know, Atalanta was a princess who was abandoned in the woods and raised by bears

So Beel is raised by bears. Which is way better than being raised by wolves

They teach him how to hunt, gather, and its all well and cute. He sometimes entered the rebuilding kingdom to trade in leftover meat for clothes and weapons- and, to try and find Belphie. No luck.

Eventually, Beel grows to be a powerful warrior. Hangry, sure, but his rage hold the rage of freaking bears. so keep him fed. please.

Anyways Lucifer and the gang (everyone minus belphie) encounter Beel in the woods, watching the cubs. Beel agrees to adventure with them. He says goodbye to bear mom and promises to visit- hopefully, with his twin, next time.

Belphegor

hehe its ME

Zariel Tiefling but i dont give a shit about the infernal legacy its just There. tail is a cow's tail he basically just looks like his demon form

Hermit background. again ill explain in a sec

Druid, circle of stars! to people about to scream "i just checked the wikidot why he no circle of dreams??" because that doesnt have to do with dreams and sleep as i wished it did. its the obligatory faewild subclass. i hate the faewild subclasses (other than the bard one that ones fun)

Currently n the campaign im in we're level 5, so his two wildshapes are wolf, and a bull. But he also has his three starry forms due to being circle of stars.

now. backstory! strap in this is Long

he's saved by my previous dnd character- Avi- and is taken in by him and his husband when the rebellion was over.

Except. due to seeing his sister die and not seeing his twin after that, Belphie assumed the worse and thought that Beel also died and he was the last one of his family

He fell into a pretty deep depression and had no motivation to do anything besides sleep, cry, and eat very tiny portions of meals.

eventually his adoptive dads start telling him stories. and. surprisingly. they seem to help! Belphie is still a shrinking violet but he eats more and can cook and do basic chores!

And Then Avi Goes Missing

His husband- Skull- asks the now 11 year old Belphie if he wants to come along to find him. Belphie declines, saying he needs to get in control of his life and some big quest is probably just gonna leave him with more trauma

Skull lets him stay home, and gives him one of his feathers. So if Belphie ever needs a hand, he can call Skull over and. well. have one of his dads at least

For five years, Belphie took to studying druidcraft, and the stars. He also enchanted his favorite pillow to float and be able to carry him. So he had a little more comfort when going out to buy groceries. He'd make detailed star maps to sell in return

When the sun rose on his 16th birthday, he left a note at home saying he felt ready to tackle his own destiny, and left.

He had a brush with Lucifer, but not Beel. so close, buddy.

Anyways he arrives at The Hunters Guild, finds his parents again, and takes residence in the observatory, where he studies his stars and druid magic again. But also, sleep and dreams.

and. yeah thats where we leave off! god that was long im sorry

[jovenshires]

i personally feel like if you're writing rpf you've gotta be prepared that the people you're writing about do have internet access and aren't clueless y'know? like. i understand not wanting them to see it and for their sake id hope they wouldn't either but no one is entitled to write about a real person and then demand that real person can't access something that is literally About Them. like. just bc they're "famous" doesn't make them public domain yknow.

now i do find those youtubers read fanfic videos kinda cringe personally too bc i mean they always have to choose bad or funny ones otherwise itd be 10h long and awkward. but yeah im also like. those people chose to write and upload those somewhere on a public forum that the people they're writing about Do have access to. i feel like that just comes with the territory in rpf. they aren't fictional and they can in fact read those. if you don't want them to it should be shared somewhere very personal imo.

but yeah obviously since the majority of the fics that do get picked for those vids are probably written by teenagers i do feel kinda bad for them for that but i feel like thats a hard lesson in that those people are in fact real and can see it. i never rly enjoy the content where ppl read fanfics about themselves tho for this reason. but if this is going to be submitted ones i think that might be funny and definitely a better way to go about this on their part. i still dread it tho and will probably cringe out of my skin (also i wonder who that video will include...)

i do agree with you. i put a warning before all my fics in the hopes that they won't read it, but as my dear friend mer always says, i'm not a cop. i can't control what you do. and i joke that i want spencer agnew to block me but it's just that - a joke (well, a half-joke). if they're seeking this out, that's on them at that point. they are grownups; they know how the internet works and they know how to avoid things and how to search them out. i can't even really be pissed if they put my work in a video, bc hey, it's out there (even if i would rather they didn't look in my general direction). but at the same time, i will say this:

i am making these things about smosh members, but they're certainly not for smosh members. they can read them if they wish or use them if they wish (like i said i literally cant do anything to stop them bc, you're right, we do publish these things publically) but they're not made for them. so when they read them and they're like "oh, that's weird, who would write something like that," well. it wasn't intended for them to read in the first place. and now they've gone and alienated a bunch of people who looked up to them. people who watched their content and were inspired to create something. it's kind of hard to stomach when they're mocking a portion of their fanbase - and not only are they mocking them, but they're making them a butt of the joke for other portions of their fan base. they uplift fan artists and video editors, but fic authors for some reason are always looked down upon. i think there's a difference between acknowledging it exists / talking about it and directly making content to target it you know.

i don't know if there's a "lesson" to be learned from all this. i don't personally think those teens who were writing that fanfiction deserve to be ridiculed for it. i think they'd found a way to express themselves and that's great. i personally hadn't written for months when i started writing smosh fic again, and writing is truly one of my biggest passions in life. the smosh cast, who i'm incredibly grateful for, led me back to it. but i digress; maybe i'm just naive.

i'll also add: i'm not saying, like, fuck the smosh cast for this btw. like i do agree it is their right to look at things on the internet made about them and use it for content. they're even allowed to make fun of it. i'm sure to some people it is weird to read stuff like that about yourself, they're allowed to say that and have that opinion. so go ham, make this kind of video all you want. im just saying it's kind of a dick move and i personally am not a fan of it. but im not gonna stop watching smosh over it or anything and i don't think the cast is worse people for it. i just dislike this kind of video. i dislike a lot of videos - i don't enjoy the tntl trivial pursuit videos and the fortnite videos either. this doesn't make me any less of a fan of theirs, just an opinionated fan.

anyway, like i said, i'm glad it's submitted fics - truly, i'm thrilled. it's still not for me (like i said i already have a hard enough time watching smosh pit theater........ i simply cant do this) but i think it's fine and a good way to go about it!! i hope the video is, for everyone who enjoys this kind of thing, a good video. as for whos gonna be in it - could be anybody at this point (ive read so many pairings yall have no idea) but im so certain i/anthony is gonna be there.

tldr: i do agree, but i also think the renditions of this they've done in the past have mocked fic writers for no good reason. if you want to watch the video i hope you enjoy, and i'm glad they're using submitted fics this time ! <3

[zombu7]

imagine omegaverse pottercest ...

harry being a cute omega (he and ginny, an alpha, divorced years ago) that works, he's either a professor or head of the auror division, and takes care of the home. james and albus are alphas and are both panting after harry, and get into fights over it all the time. but only when they're at harry's house, since his scent, which is everywhere, gets them riled up. whenever harry intervenes, they have to lie about the cause of the fight because they can't just say 'we both wanna breed your hole' LMAO

and imagine that they get increasingly more daring with their dad. one of them steals a piece of his clothing (maybe something from his heat👀) and uses it to wank.

they get really horny over the idea of harry doing household chores too. just watching him cook while they sit down at the dining table, thinking 'this is where he should be', while also imagining bending him over the counter and railing him.

and when harry's in heat, or even pre-heat, they literally lose their minds. can't be anywhere near harry because they'll probably take and mate him

they're both uber territorial over harry, like to an obnoxious degree. they chase away all of harry's suitors and complain that 'aren't we enough dad? why do you always have to go looking for some weak alpha when we can take care of you😢?'. so when harry brings home draco or someone else one time to meet them, they act super hostile, and the man lowkey suspects they're jealous. but when he tells harry, harry insists that he's letting his own jealousy cloud his perception. harry also tells him they can't go out anymore, as he can't date someone his children don't approve of, as they're the top priority in his life. when the man leaves, james and albus are just glaring smugly over harry's head and hugging harry. harry is none-the-wiser

I have so many ideas for this pairing, you are a godsend for picking it up as well! your art is gorgeous <3

HELLO ANON FIRST OF ALL IM SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG BUT OMFG YES?? TO ALL OF THIS HELLO??:?:?

I’d read this so bad pls I neeeeed it omggg single omega dilf hp being Gatekept by his sons and hawwy being none the wiser is so hot fuck 😭🫶

Al and James having some sort of shaky truce whenever there’s someone else besides Just then that are after their dad 🤭 each other they can totally handle as much as it annoys the alpha inside them but the moment an Outsider tries to claim whats theirs they will not have Any of it!!

Also I think itd be soo funny if Lily luna (beta) is the only sane one in their family watching all this unfold rolling her eyes meanwhile ginny is watching how obsessed they are with HP every time she visits like “huh. They really ARE my sons 🥰… but that’s concerning 😦”

Just… Albus and James guilt tripping their dad is sooo good and Harry knows that sometimes he can be harsh, he’s never had a proper dad before so he wouldn’t know, and he just wants what’s best so he really will let his sons do whatever to him 🤭🤭🤭

Thank you so much for bringing this brainrot back to me JFBFBDV I LOVE ALL OF THIS I’ll call u the a/b/o pottercest anon haha

[teamskull-datingsim]

okay just for my own sake heres my relationships with the undertale cast.

for context: in jeremytale, as im calling it, the Player latches onto me instead of frisk but frisk is still there. and killing someone is never a possibility. the dialogue options, whether mean or sarcastic, are something I myself would say regardless of being possessed by an Entity

frisk: thats a little sibling if ive ever seen one holy shit. in general i think theyre a cute kid and i think they look up to me but also theyre full of sass and love to backtalk (back sign??) me

chara: another little sibling. I love narrachara theory and it carries over. little dead guy (nonbinary) and their strange living cohort. chara voice Fun fact! If I was alive, I'd be your age! jeremy voice Thats really depressing dead kid

flowey: little sibling number threeee jesus christ. yes he hates me yes if something bad happens to me he will try and hurt the person who did it!! i just think hes a weird flower... until i learn the truth obviously. i try to be supportive but hes kind of a stinker

toriel: "wow this is. a bigger human than im used to having fallen here. Whatever still my child." i think shes awesome and i would love to hug her. however i do think i remind her of chara and asriel for time until she realizes that comparing me to either of them is unfair to everyone. im still her child though. Goat Mother

sans: he goes between "i need to avoid this guy at all fucking costs" and "hey it's not that bad. hes just autistic. thats cool". I do get mad at him frequently for patronizing papyrus (and he tries to do it to me too but i am not above threatening him). on the surface we relax with each other quite a bit. Especially when he realizes that me and papyrus are a good match. and also when he stops babying his brother lol

papyrus: man. cmon. you know this. i do think itd be funny that if i ever actually made jeremytale the outcome of the papyrus fight will always be the dating segment no matter what the player has me do. compliment him? "hey buddy i like your scarf! i have one just like it" "Y-YOU... SUCH A SINCERE TONE! ARE YOU... FLIRTING WITH ME?!?!" ".What". intimidate him? "(*You stand up to your full height and look down on Papyrus.)" "W-WOWIE... TRYING TO SHOW ME YOUR IMPRESSIVE STATURE... ARE YOU... FLIRTING WITH ME!?" "huh." just straight up spare him? "S-SO MYSTERIOUS AND STOIC... YOU MUST BE TRYING TO IMPRESS ME... YOURE FLIRTING?!" "WHAT!!!!!!!"

undyne: at first she hates me but once i get the undyne hang out we are. Basically siblings. she thinks me and papyrus are great and we become a trio of it. she loves noogieing me because i actually put up a fight. i also confront Her on babying papyrus but i think she already knows its bad. i also think she is so funny. most forgetful fish on the planet. WHY DIDNT YOU SIGN YOUR LETTER

alphys: im so cool to her when shes just watching my journey but when we meet face to face she quickly realizes im just as much of a dork as her. we're best friends

mettaton: i am so quirky and funny to him not in a patronizing way but like. That one video of "(excited voice) How do you keep your pants up when you perform, its incredible!" "....... belt". of course once i see EX its like. of course you have black hair and pronouns. unparalleled friend group of me, papyrus, undyne, alphys and mettaton

asgore: he is so. he thinks im an odd chap but mostly very polite and sweet. reminds him of chara much like toriel and makes him very sentimental. hes not really a dad to me but i do think he enjoys my company

[betawooper]

why YJH orv shouldve been a girl

*Specifically a trans woman, btw. If she was a cis woman that would be a different conversation and there are nuances regarding transness which wouldnt exist in what im talking about otherwise

(This is gonna be a bulleted list bc fuck ordering things in an essay format, also mega orv spoilers so look away if you havent read the novel in its entirety)

it wouldve been a legitimate time save in previous regressions while mastering breaking the sky swordsmanship and that concept is So Funny to me

the transcenders are all gnc af, theres a whole theme surrounding breaking from the norm to reach their true potential, it wouldve fit thematically

if done right, it could emphasize the theme of loneliness thats tied with joonghyuk’s character if none of her other companions are trans; even if they were it wouldnt have mattered since they would have forgotten she was a woman in future regressions anyway

if she tries to repress her identity bc expression of it is deemed unnecessary or meaningless, even more points

would have pushed the narrative foiling with dokja even further since they already have opposing imagery and metaphors, now they would be the opposite gender too

the ‘does dokja and joonghyuk is gay’ joke wouldnt poke fun at the thought of two men being together, but rather at the absurdity of a relationship occurring and still being called such in the first place simply bc of joonghyuk’s gender

bonus points if you emphasize joonghyuk’s canonical lack of interest/attraction to men in light of this, dokja could have joked about that easily

random person: “you two look like lovers lol”

dokja, internally: the bitch is literally a lesbian but Okay-

it would have fit orv’s style of comedy a lot and also remove the slightly homophobic undertones of the original joke too, do you see a downside to this? i dont

she would parallel sookyung (dokja’s mom) even more since joonghyuk essentially “raised” dokja after sookyung could no longer do so

theres already a strong theme about how twsa became dokja’s caretakers in a sense and having joonghyuk be a mother figure instead of a father figure would push the idea of her taking up what should have been sookyung’s duties

besides, the narrative focuses way more on how the lack of a present maternal figure affects dokja over a paternal one so itd be more relevant

also insert joke about joonghyuk being a milf

next, this would parallel sooyoung a lot more, there tends to be this joke amongst creative circles that a creator often projects parts of themselves in their works and that includes characters, both of them being women would make that way more obvious

parallels hayoung bc uh, Trans obviously (sooyoung loves her trans main protagonists lmao)

transfem joonghyuk wouldve made her dynamic/relationship with seolhwa much more interesting since they wouldnt be a typical “het” couple anymore, seolhwa’s character could have been given a little more relevance with the kind of conflicts which could arise from this, the most obvious relating to sexuality

on that note, their ideas of femininity and how they prefer to express it are completely different despite them both being the same gender which could bring up interesting conversations about it (mostly thinking about that scene where seolhwa and joonghyuk go to the auction house prior to gigantomachia and talk about cosmetic skills, this scene couldve been way more fleshed out than it was presented in canon)

if you still want the punisher to exist, this could also fit into that conversation about gender expression and bring up interesting ideas depending on how butch you make joonghyuk

both seolhwa and the punisher would add a lot of complexity to joonghyuk’s whole relationship with self-indulgence and happiness since again, bc of her situation as a regressor she either wouldnt want to open herself up in the interest of practicality or doesnt feel deserving of it when her goal hasnt been accomplished

god are there more points? ill edit this if so but this is already so fucking long-

I actually wrote a whole thing about joonghyuk being uncracked during the events of orv and the comedic potential of it is endless when dokja is the only one who knows, so trust me when i say it does work out very very well (i can link to the stuff in the replies? so far ive got uhhhhh *counts* 54k words of that shit)

Anyways transfem yjh supremacy

[t4tdanvis]

Dante selfcest rant 👀 👀

-@gendervoid-zane

im going to shove a couple (read: many) posts ive previously made about this here and then rant about it MORE bc im MENTALL ILL!!!!!

now AHEM

u see this could work with mcd dante ending up in the mys universe OR mys dante ending up in the mcd universe - or even they go back and forth between both!! either way could be very interesting and silly

with mcd dante ending up in the mys universe, it would be very funny to watch him try to figure out what the Fuck is going on bc mf has no idea what a phone or a computer is and is just so fucking confused. at first mys dante is more focused on going "hey wanna play video games!!!" to stop and process that mcd dante doesnt even know what a video game is. and then seeing mcd dantes confusion at Literally Everything he decides to sit down and try to explain things (unfortunately mys dante is Dumb - fortunately mcd dante is equally Dumb so mys dante going "this is a phone... it does... stuff.... you can call people!! idk how they made it able to do that tho dont ask me :D" is good enough for him)

on the other hand, with mys dante ending up in the mcd universe, itd be even Crazier because mys dante (who is used to having the internet and a car and big cities etc) is now stuck in the medieval era. thankfully mcd dante is here to help!! except he does a horrible job of helping bc he just goes "well im sure he'll figure everything out!" and then hands mys dante a sword - and is shocked when he ends up getting injured. mys dante doesnt mind because running around and throwing himself into danger is fun (especially when he gets to do that with a "friend" (read: boyfriend who he hasnt figured out hes dating yet))!! mys dante is also Struggling because adhd meds dont exist yet and his brain is completely fried and he can barely function until zoey figures out how to make potions thatll help. which leads to mys dante bouncing off the walls and mcd dante having to practically drag him to bed every night to get him to go to sleep, until mys dante Finally is able to function properly again

and, of course, the inherent romantic comedy of "i cant be in love with this other version of myself nope nope nope- oh god the other version of me is hot". the first time they kissed they stared at each other for a solid five minutes before mcd dante went "so uh.... yeah....." and mys dante just went "that was like... kissing myself. haha"

they are both Dumb and do not know how to function correctly around each other. they are mischievous silly little guys who cant stop getting into trouble and getting injured and doing stupid shit (but its ok bc their friends somehow keep them from getting themselves killed). and also they definitely tried to make out in a tree but ended up falling out of it and getting hurt. and at one point they tried to make out underwater and somehow didnt realize how stupid of an idea thatd be until they almost drowned. theyre gay and silly and dumb ur honor

this post was uhhhh way longer than id expected but thats ok ty for listening to me rant sorry it took a bit to type all this LOL

[mutedeclipse]

Hey sorry about the delay on this post but here is the phantom bomber ship dynamic breakdown post

I will not pull any punches and i will be blunt, if i forget anyone its because ive litterally never seen them shipped before, this post is also under the assumption that all of the characters listed are 18+ (covering my bases here, ykno?)

Starting out with ol' reliable phantom/blue. This ship dynamic is the most canon fueled and widely shipped out of the dynamics ive seen.. for good reason! They make good foils for eachother in a way that meshes really nicely and that can make for undeniably sweet n cute moments. Beit blue snuggled up and snoozing while phantom does late night work or simply the homoerotic tension that comes from blue beta testing his code and absolutely exploiting every bug, i think blue would be quite healthy for him. 5 stars. Good ship.

While discussing the bomber siblings, ill address a ship dynamic i have been told ive forgotten in the past. Being phantom/black, a ship I've seen that presumably cites the credits of sbr1 on the grounds of them seeming to interact post R. While i didnt pay much mind to it, i can see the merit given that interaction in canon is like looking for water in the Sahara desert. Black, being blunt... Is a dumb bitch (affectionate) which could bounce off phantom pretty well, likely the two bonding over a fondness of the theatrical... if feelings do develop i cant shake the feeling that phantom would be the first to engage.. i think phantom would engage as hes the least awkward about romance out of the two by default. And i think black would be hesitant and have a crisis about "oh my god am i gay???" (No honey youre bisexual its ok) . The entire relationship hinges on whether or not you think they could both get past their own egos and not beat eachother to death about it. ultimately could be a decent ship! I think they work better as friends personally. 3 stars.

Ok, now onto the dastardly bombers oriented ships, these will probably get a little controversial

phantom/magnet is a ship that i find VERY funny because i think itd not work at all romantically. Sorry to the exactly one person ive seen ship this but im taking R at face value for this post, they would constantly squabble and could honestly not stand eachother in any intimate situation besides the bedroom and even then i think that wouldnt be satisfactory for either of them lmao. Magnet would INSIST on topping and it would suck really bad. 1 star. Not a fan they seem more like friendly rivals instead tbh

phantom/golem on the other hand would make a GREAT dynamic imo, always pops into my head every now and then. Golem, despite not really speaking much is a kind and gentle soul. Making for a great anchor to phantom. I tend to think of them more platonic, but i DO think they'd have good romantic chemistry. They like to hang out and sit near eachother like cats and simply enjoying eachother's company... Phantom could study his mane of flora and tell him about every little insect that inhabits his garden and i think golem would happily listen making inquisitive beeps about things. And i personally headcanon phantom tends to have issues remembering to maintain himself in his working hours, i think golem takes time to remind him to. Sweet dynamic. 4 stars. One of my favorites.

Ok so. I think phantom/karaoke *could* work... But phantom/pretty could not. You feel me? Like hands down theyre good friends either way, but karaoke amd phantom have a little more of a spark there. since pretty is... Bland in R. To say the least. Im not a fan i can see her visiting him and them holding good conversation, nothing more really. But karaoke has classic pretty mannerisms, being quite charismatic and flirty in a way i think could absolutely decimate him. Like after a long ramble about his latest project she would stare him dead in the eye after picking up about half of what he said and asking him if he wants to make out or something to fuck with him and he would go bright purple. Decent ship. 1 star for pretty but 3 for karaoke. Round it down to a 2 if you want

Ok onto the ship i think i may have brought into existence... phantom/plasma, I honestly think plasma would also make a good supportive anchor to phantom, similar to golem but in a more active way. I think they'd mesh well personality wise, theyre both seemingly quite good natured at heart if the snippets from R can be trusted, i think their shared compassion could breed understanding and trust between the two, trust blossoming into something more down the line. Not a relationship that would happen over night but one that i honestly am a sucker for. They should curl up together and watch movies in the cold winter. Good comfort ship. 5 stars. Fight me over this im not budging.

Phantom/me.

I love him. That is all phantom ships. Goodbye.

[goremet-chef]

mannnn me and my friend. teehee

we play games together all the time and we're doing minecraft rn and idk i FEEL like its too sappy to tell her "hey i like how we are" okay like i can tell itd be hard to phrase that in a way that she wouldnt be like ".. thanks?? " OKAY SHE DOESNT MEAN IT we just. IDK how to explain it. so ill just talk about it here 😁😁

we just flow really well together, she can entertain herself mostly and i can be there and we bully the shit out of eachother and god its so fun its genuinely. i told her i was planning to tunnel into her walls but secretly, so she didnt hear it from me and she went "what?im not paying attention to you" i feel like. to other people that would sound bad but i just teeheed so hard man like . QUIETLY THATS WHY IM WRITING THIS we're still in vc but man

its really hard for me to be comfortable in vc with anyone, even if i really want to, but me and her? we just fit man. ive known her for like. 8 years at this point?? maybe a little less but either way. shes the only one of my friends that i can be alone with in vc comfortably as of right now, like IDK i never expected this but im not complaining. like even my friend ive known for 11 YEARS, i love them to bits id do anything for them, but the reality is that we are just AWKWARD PEOPLE and awkward people are sillay when they talk okay its the same with my other friend like we are just very awkward by nature so our awkwardness duplicates when we're alone, to the point where its like. he thinks its awkward and it is but its so awkward that its fucking hilarious i think its so funny man

love my friends with all my heart but something about me and her? like WE'RE SO GOOOOD we werent even that close when we first met? like she was my friends friend and became my friend by proximity but now we're tight bro we get drunk together we get high together i love that for us. i couldnt have guessed it would go this way, but thats the beauty of life 🥳 chaotic and unruly, i wouldnt have it any other way.

she comes home and tells me all her work drama and then we just pick on eachother for several hours and its so funny to me every time i dont care how many times we say the same things its always funny im always gonna make myself laugh when im mean for no reason and ill always laugh when shes mean back like IDK thats just our friendship and we like it that way its great

also shes been just like? IDK we are all queers (except one of us hes our token cishet i guess) she doesnt even remember my deadname anymore despite knowing me by that for most the time we've known eachother its great. and honestly? this is kind of embarrassing to admit but sometimes when shes making fun of me for being dumb she says 'sillay boy' in a little tune and when i get really stressed out i call myself that in my head to calm me down a bit like. NOTHING ID EVER TELL HER but we know we love eachother teehee. IDK i feel like i just express a lot of gratitude towards my other friends but not much to her, probably cuz we talk so much it just feels agiven like i cannot stand her she sucks thats why shes my bestie 😁😁

like MAN idk theres so much shit i could talk about. we fight and i propose to her in lethal company with the ring and then shes mad at me and divorced cuz i sold our ring to meet quota like. STUPID SHIT LIKE THAT. this is gonna sound weird but i just like being bullied????? like ill always throw it back is the thing we work great cuz its never one sided its a mutual thing. if i go first she say 'shut up dominic' and im like NO fuck you like . to an outsider we do not like eachother but i promise we do its making me like. GIDDY RN i love thinking about it. she just made fun of me for being on tumblr instead of building my GAZEBO but im talking about you dumbass!!!! (she doesnt have a tumblr so. what does it matter SKFJS)

i dont know its so fun for me, im just surprised that like. someone i initially didnt know all that well is now my ride or die and we fit SO GOOD like i genuinely couldve never expected it back in middle school but im glad we are the way that we are. love talking to her, love making fun of her, love when she calls me stupid and WHATEVER ELSE like god its so funny. love ignoring her and harassing children in roblox with her like we have such a good time no matter what

shes one of the very few people i can like. just get in a call with for no reason, like if she has drama to tell me and we arent really doing anything else ill still join for what i think is like 10 minutes and leave 2 hours later 💀 love leaving her too shes so dramatic she knows by the tone in my voice when i say her name that im gonna leave call and shes always like no dont do this to me gurl bye!!!!!i got better shit to do!!!!!!! (lie) love to betray her also she sucks

i remember she invited me down (like an hour drive) to watch mario movie and she took me out to olive garden and i CRIEDD it was the first time i went to olive garden and it was so good and she laughed at me. that high is like. I DONT KNOW i feel like im explaining it POORLY its just so silly to me, its so fucking funny

grining right now. im not even tired weve been playing for hours and im not tired at all. love bothering her she deserves it. like would i lay down my life for her? yes absolutely. would i also insult her randomly while shes not doing anything? yes absolutely. i guess its cuz i know she can take it, thats why she does the same to me. idk its just how we're comfortable, we like it this way!!!! hhehehheehee

this is far too sappy to share with her but we love to hate eachother so i think im doin a pretty good job

[scalproie]

soundwave (was HE in the blue character poll? or do i need to hit someone w my car) for the character ask game. and sure do all of them why not

NO HE WAS DW he was against optimus but if he wasnt there it wouldve been my last straw

• My first impression of them

Oh so he's the coolest character in transformers prime huh

• When I think I truly started to like them (or dislike them, if you've sent me a character I don't like)

Oh so hes the coolest character in transformers as a whole huh

• A song that reminds me of them

I did not go insane over him on this song two years ago to not put it here

• How many people I ship them with

ONE I either dont really care or dont like most soundwave ships

• My favorite ship of them

Soundrod You Will Always Be Famous.

• My least favorite ship of them

Theorically I UNDERSTAND the appeal but I CANNOT see him with any of the other decepticon high command whether itd be megatron, starscream or shockwave

• A quote of them that you remember

[clown music]

• Your favorite outfit of them

Prime, Cyberverse and Earthspark You Will Always Be Famous.

• Your least favorite outfit of them

the comics. Like YEAH its his g1 design and you cant improve perfection but I wish there was a bit more edge to him yknow?

• Describe the character in one sentence

Play that funky music, blue bot

• What’s the first thing you think about when thinking about the character?

The perfect decepticon didnt need to go as hard as it did

• Sexuality hc!

Autobot-sexual which is synonymus with moro-sexual

• Your favorite friendship they have

His kids and pets dont count so get over here shadowstriker

• Best storyline they had

Hey guys are you perhaps familiar with a little arc called the quintesson arc from transformers cyberv

• Worst storyline they had

Remember him in rid2015? I wish i didnt

• A childhood headcanon

NEVER A CHILD

• What do you think their first word was?

edm

• How do you think they were as a kid? (Like, were they shy, noisy, wild, etc)

NEVER A CHILD

• The most random ship you've seen people have with them

bro its transformers theres a random ship everyday

• An headcanon

So autistic even by tf standards. Always a surprise to him when bots are like wow... soundwave is so mysterious and kinda creepy...

• When do you think they were at their happiest?

Cyb soundwave somehow cemented himself as the definitive soundwave in my mind. Anyway when the peace treaty got signed.

• When do you think they were at their lowest?

The whole fucking war babeyyy

• Future headcanon

:) one day he will finally finish a series alive with an autobot bf

• What do you think is a secret they have that they never told anyone?

has a really normie taste in music actually

• When do you think they acted the most ooc

Its transformers theyre always OOC depending on who you ask

• When do you think they were being "themselves" the most?

that stupid cyberverse dance

• If they could meet a character from another show/movie/etc, who would be the most fun for them to meet?

put that beast in no straight road

• The most unnecessary thing they ever did?

I will literally never get over him fucking walking everywhere in cyberverse. Hes one of the decepticons weve seen the most are you telling me they COULDNT afford an armored SUV model? God bless

• How do you think they would be as a parent? (and if they are a parent, how do you think they would be if they weren't?)

Cybertron's best single dad by default

• The funniest scene they had?

When isnt he funny. [clown music]

[dullahandyke]

supposed to be doing a 2k essay due on monady but i havent been able to focus so have some notes on athena cykes: keyblade revolutionnaire

quite honestly, i think being a keyblade wielder is athena's calling. she fits in there so fuckin well its astounding. she basically has magic, shes an expert in the goings-on of heart and mind and shit, shes already strong as fuck, i think she would love it there

i decided to set this post-kh3 and/or melody of memories, which was a bad decision because ive not played either of those games but whatever

aaverse is in quadratum!!! on their side, trucy was doing a magic show and made thena disappear and couldnt get her to reappear kfldkjflskjdf on the other side, the fairy godmother was doing some shit like 'let us bring back sora' and instead of sora, athena popped out. whoops! now she has to use her emotion powers to get sora back somehow [method pending]

initial chapters have her partnered w riku just bcos i think itd be funny. athena desperately trying to explain what a lawyer is to riku, who wont stop replying 'but if theyre doing bad things why dont you just defeat them in combat'

HER N KAIRI FRIENDS!!! friends they deserveit. i think kairi would remind her of juniper a bit

her n ienzo also friends bcos im predictable :) they bond over widget being cool and then the backstory horrors with a side of 'guy who felt emotions for the first time 2 months ago + guy with emotion reading powers'

i really want her to go to wonderland. i think it would be fun

OH YEAH SHE GETS AN ASS-KICKING OUTFIT!! im thinking crop hoodie with long sleeves + a skirt with leggings + her stupid boots

she gets a keyblade ofc :) idk specifics of the blade but the charm is her earring

also mayhaps slight au where the phantom was from the khverse? torn between nobody bcos Look At Them and one of the primordial darknesses bcos why not

anyway please imagine the end of this au where the khverse and aaverse do tradesies between sora and athena and she turns up back at the office 3 months later, on the missing persons list and holding a big big sword, like 'hey guys funny story'

^and at the end she gets a special quadratum-edition gummi add-on to widget so she can keep in touch with all her kingdom hearts friends :)

[guideaus]

late tristamp 8 thoughts

the voice filter thing makes rem (?) outright sound like a robot

i see knives and vash have different origins

sc-fi that has shit be like the most transparent tablet or whatever is so funny, its reminds me of d/bh (🤢🤮)

hate knives being less enthusiastic. i think them being different isnt automatically bad, and even if he was like hitting puberty before vash and maybe going through adolescence he still deserves respect, but it does kinda hint that he's the "bad" one. and i hate that evil/good twin shit lol

this cutting straight to the fall kind of makes it interesting. at least makes you go "oh, wow, i wonder what happened" as opposed to starting the show off with it

tristamp might be assigning more guilt to vash concrening knives? if knives is telling the truth. in the manga and anime knives just fucking... hacked smth idk, while here knives makes it sound like vash let him in on a little secret to the "explode all ships" button he instantly regretted

i cant take his voice actor seriously though

rem didnt shove them in diff clothes in this adaptation??

this makes it a bit more gruesome, vash being near the corpses instead of the twins watching afar

i wonder how tristamp will make knives here if he isnt even attempting to deal w vash and he gets easily taken away

this woman just knows to look for plant characteristics?? its not even a surprise thing during a doctor's checkup??

i can see theyre changing the lore w the seeds ships if theres just casual people walking around fine like there wasnt a cataclysmic event just then

they handcuffed a child... what are they gonna do, put him on trial?

is this woman a fucking plant expert. i thought they were all regarded as top-secret lab experiments, esp w vash and knives being the first "independents". why does she know. or is she info dumping

Either knives and vash are much younger, or conrad did get an intentional life extending thingy

orange not changing rem's name is so funny. knives got nai, but her last name is still just "save" added onto her first name. why not seibrem!!!

also we're the same height :)

the guy (brad?) is really annoying.

what the fuck is their food

rip luida's appearance. orange said "not cute anime waifu? GROSS."

i genuinely wonder why they put brad and luida here. are they just trying to take a short cut between making vash visit his home and connecting the backstory

IS LUIDA LYING ABOUT REM?? DID REM NOT HELP ANYONE?!?!? AM I UNDERSTANDING THAT SCENE RIGHT???

this ep also has the problem of the world looking lifeless, itd be understandable if it was explained (everyone else died, theyre hiding, etc.,) but it seems like its literally just luida and brad here. I genuinely cant tell if shes lying abt other survivors or orange cant afford more models to show them lol

are they trying to make vash repeat after knives. or is it unintentional? i feel like vash wouldnt want to copy knives after the fall tho lol. i might be reading too into it, but they did choose almost the exact same words, so..

why are they keeping vash locked up lol. wouldnt luida just trying to have him help with like... whatever someone can imagine is going on there (idk, orange wont show us anything) to possibly sway him even if he has ulterior motives. he's not even hurt, theres no reason she'd act nice and do that, i feel if vash wasnt depressed atm he'd become scared of them. theyre treating him like a decorative plant

we finally barely see bland people BUT HOW ARE THE PEOPLE SAYING HOW GROSS HE LOOKS WHEN HE LOOKS JUST LIKE THEM FSDGHDHS??? in the 90s anime, it made sense when ppl were freaked out by watching how quickly they aged around them, but theres no reason for them to be acting like this to him. he's locked up, so that one thing where ppl assume "locked up" = "they must have done something to deserve it (his treatment)", couldve come into play, but calling him gross lol?? maybe making fun of his outfit at most or smth but??

WHY DO THEY ALL WANT HIM DEAD SO BAD FJHDJD??? its not even a "this is against the rules" thing (which could work bc in this universe, they were all alive pre-fall), but they just want him dead for some reason...

more bland people

vash is a plant empath

WHY ARE THEY SO OPPOSED TO HIM LMAO

i don't think i like the presentation of rem's iconic speech. there's no context shown for it, i was scared luida was gonna take it, but here its just loosely connected. in fact, i don't think it really matches at all. originally it was about rem and vash wanting to die, they argue you have something to live for, and vash uses it to be hopeful and say people can change even when they've done bad. here it gives off the impression that vash can live to be useful to the humans, therefore he'll finally earn their respect (which is bad lol). even if its related to vash's apparent guilt of knives being able to drop everyone from the sky, its not clear enough. the audience doesnt know the context

SHE SAYING IT AS SHE'S DYING?? why would she think either kid would ever hear it, lol. i feel it doesnt fit any situation in tristamp, im more focused on the plant than what she's saying, so frankly its kind of leaving my mind as shes saying it despite me already knowing it

the plant reminds me tristamp elendira looks like that :/

i guess vash's power here is healing steven universe style, but just through minimum contact ig

he now has an appetite (trying to live), his handcuffs coming off, and a new bed. absolutely feel like a reward for his actions... it feels bad... that absolutely gives him new problems and i dont think it was intentional. thats not good for a 2 y/o, lol. somehow orange repeated the manga's introduction better here than in the reboot's own 2 first eps...

the stuff with tristamp wolfwood and brad just isnt funny. in the manga/anime, brad had that immature attitude to show off in front of jessica, he was also jealous of vash for being an older bro type and jessica had a crush on him, so he felt like the competition. here he's just... being an asshole? the "yeah, he did something useful, i guess he can get a bed now" doesnt feel like a lot. luida too, she apologizes, but doesnt explain why they did that (and that its inexcusable)

so is he using up his powers in tristamp too, or.

HOW ARE THE RESIDENTS STILL CONCERNED ABOUT HIM. BY THE TIME HES A TEEN THEY SHOULD BE REVERING HIS ASS?? or abusing him

hes a little lanky teen, awww

why did they give him a jacket that's too big, lol. its like they found a random one advertising their company and just let him have it. and not a single other character has a similar jacket

OH MY GOD BRAD IS BACK TO BEING IRRATIONAL. no "Hey, kiddo... what's this?" COME ON. luida collapses too, like werent you the smarter, nicer one??

vash runs away out of fear, so ig maybe he would have done that before.

why did vash kind of hide his running away letter. hes copying rem

brad is back to feeling guilty?? what the fuck is going on. pick one. frankly, itd make sense for him to think "running away" = "guilty" with how he started

i dont know why they cut to the present for 30 seconds just to go back in time again

it sucks no one was nearby when vash woke up, but that might be hard for orange. idk why they cant have more than 3 characters in a scene

[pinkseas]

u kno the drill

IN THE MIDDLE OF CLASS AND A LECTURE HELP MEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE OH YM GOD dont blame u tho id probably do the same

“ITS SO NICE that both of them get to teach each other what they lack” what can i say a girl will think of two characters being able to teach things to each other and lose her mind a little bit about it

“wanderer having absolutely No Filters when talking to kid as young as collei but still being sorta courteous to her trauma is so fUCKIGN FUNNY IM NGL AT LEAST USE PROPER WORDS BRO THATS A CHILDKFHSHHF” i am giggling sm at this you have no idea

“i didnt even know youd actually USE the fjsjhfjahf all the things u slid in answering my ask abt xiao albedo contributinf and its sO GREAT ITS SO FUNNY” I DIDNT KNOW I WAS GONNA USE THEM EITHER ADMITTEDLY at first None of those beginning bits were supposed to be there it started when collei walked into the room but. well. i am Weak and Predictable and i thought itd be a little silly to include it just a little bit

“albedo's willingness to help being connected to his own moral strength regarding protecting his family at all costs is Real” as much as i adore him and got the vibe that he Would be willing for many reasons i dont actually know his character very well at all so i am genuinely so glad to hear you of all people say this as an albedo lover it feels like ive done right by the world

“it was so satisfying that she could do it with her own hands no matter how vicious it was” oh to have had collei slice his ribcage open tear the bones out one by one and rip his still-beating heart from his chest.... idk i had a lot of things that didnt feel like they would’ve been as satisfying just bc he wouldve died so quickly bc of it but i do kinda wish id used that as an ending instead. the vines still consume his corpse and she drops the heart and lets it be eaten up until there’s nothing left and she can remember the way it felt to tear it out and hold it and........ man idk. there’s just. something So Personal about her doing it herself about it being with her own two hands about her laying his hands on him so many times even with magic at her disposal i couldnt NOT do it

“idt doijg it a few hours till dawn is Enough BUT AS LONG AS SHES SATISFIED IT IS NOW” NO BC LITERALLYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY i did also strongly consider her deciding she was done with him and letting scara have a turn to fuck him up but admittedly i kind of just wanted to get it over with and i didnt have enough ideas to really make it as satisfying as i wanted it to be which is so sad

 “the dottorture” HAS ME WHEEZING OH MY GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD

“he lets collei do all the work do all whats needed to give that payback even tho hes also part of the experiment. his empathy is way less unseen and hes willing to give it all to collei despite himself swearing to the gods he despise that dottore should just Suffer. but if its in the hands of someone else and he could see it all thats just as much satisfaction when he gets to see collei finding solace at such young age” yeah <3333333333333 as much as he’d Love to kill dottore over and over and over again i think seeing him suffer at the hands of another person he fucked up so badly is enough. not ideal, not what he wouldve first thought of or really wanted, but enough. especially given that its someone he at least somewhat cares about who’ll be able to find a lot more peace in the act than scara probably would have. idk. i feel like if dottore’s other selves hadn’t been erased and scaramouche had hunted them down and tortured and killed them one by one in all kinds of different ways until every last one of them was gone it just. still wouldnt be enough. nothing would truly be enough to make him pay. but for collei, this is enough, this is more than enough, seeing him dead is enough, and if only one of them can find true satisfaction and peace with his passing regardless of how it happens he might as well give it to her.

im also glad that the hug didnt feel too out of place LMAO i feel like i was kind of pushing it there but w/e that whole thing was me pushing it why not go a little further