#like i genuinely have SO many thoughts and i'm already planning on writing for them

[bokutosbabe]

Now I'm Covered In You

(bllk boys as boyfriends)

a / n — thought making another post in this form would be fun, so i hope you enjoy!

content — bllk characters x reader, gn! reader, pet names used in a few parts, sadly canon otoya i fear, misspelled words are there for a reason i swear, cheater! otoya and oliver, some characters repeated, lmk if i missed anything!

synopsis — bllk boys and what type of boyfriend they'd be

✿.｡. “ how's one to know? ” .｡.✿

—The Romantic One

is always planning surprises for you, and i mean always. there's not a single week where you aren't being taken on 'adventures' that always lead you to a different restaurant.

what's the point in having all this money and not spending it on you?

they are constantly writing you love letters and poems. well, they try to anyway. they're not the best with their words and with many spelling mistakes, rather liking to show with actions, but they tried for you.

usually their poems end up something like this

' roses are red

so is my heart

my darling

my deer

my sweet buttercup

you taste just like a

tasty soda pop '

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ ISAGI YOICHI, shido ryusei, jyubei aryu, ALEXIS NESS

— The Player

you know the famous saying, "how you get them is how you lose them?" yeah that's exactly how this relationship is.

you'd been one of their many side quests while they had a relationship going on. eventually after they'd ended said relationship, they'd chose you as their next partner.

they do spoil you with many gifts, mostly after you catch them cheating on you for the umpteenth time, but you stayed because they 'loved you'

sure they told you they loved you, but that wasn't really the case when they'd broken up with you because you were 'boring' them.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ OTOYA EITA, oliver aiku

— The Protector

is constantly worrying about you and is looking out for your safety.

with them being this 'big bad' soccer player, many people refuses to even look you in the eyes when you were with them. but if someone dared to hit on you when they walk off for a second? please pray for them.

some guy could be asking you for directions and he'd come up behind you and wrap an arm around you without even uttering a word. you didn't have to look at them to know the look they were giving the man was nothing but deadly.

some may call it controlling, but you knew them, they just wanted to keep you safe from all these men.

you had him, who else would you need?

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ KUNIGAMI RENSUKE, rin itoshi, SHOEI BARO, tabito karasu

— The Funny (insane) One

is constantly making jokes- some that aren't funny - but you laugh anyways.

everyone always asks you how your relationship is doing so well, and the answer is always, " i don't know," because you genuinely don't. yes, the two of you get into arguments, and sometimes the two of you get heated enough to have to take time apart from each other, but you always come back together.

how?

because they always forget what the fight was even about and come back into your space to show you some cat meme they believe you would like.

and the two of you laugh until you feel better again.

maybe you don't know how your relationship is so healthy, but you know why you're happy.

because they take the time to make you laugh.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ BACHIRA MEGURU, RYUSEI SHIDO, gin gagamaru, seishiro nagi

— The Traditional One

dates. Dates. DATES!!

they took you on soooo many dates before officially asking you to be their partner.

they definitely give the vibes of "my mom taught me i needed to..."

just the best gentleman!

you need to step over a puddle? they're putting their jacket down over it for you (it wasn't necessary, but they insisted on it)

you talked about wanting to see a movie once? he's already bought the tickets.

if you get married? he's insisting you stay home

" a pretty face like you doesn't need to work, i'll provide us everything." in his words

will do anything for you, really.

°❀⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ YUKIMIYA KENYU, michael kaiser (pls ignore the mom part), REO MIKAGE, oliver aiku (again)

✿.｡. “ i'd meet you where the spirit meets the bone ” .｡.✿

likes, comments, and reblogs are appreciated!!

[yesimwriting]

I love ur felix fics sm!! ur one of my fave writers on here<<333 and no I don’t think itd b crazy to write for Nate!! I’d love to see how u would write him!! (Maybe grumpy x sunshine hehe)

hi!! this is such a nice ask :)) i'm so happy you like my felix fics

omg i love ur train of thought for a nate fic!! i've been thinking about that kind of dynamic for them, but in a really niche way

anyways let's have some thoughts on nate jacobs and sunshine/kind of sheltered reader!!

----

thinking about the moment in which you find out nate jacobs is your assigned partner for a project that's worth 35% of your final grade. if this was happening to you a year ago, maybe even two or three months ago, you might have been nervous for an entirely different reason.

but you're not that version of yourself anymore. you go out to parties now; you wear shirts to school that your mom buys for you the same way she used to buy you impulse barbies, with a wink as the cashier scans them, making you promise that you won't show dad what you got at the store; you're friends with maddy and cassie...you're on your way to best friends with maddy and cassie.

so you can't dismiss the gossip and the stares nate gets in the halls as a standard part of high school, not the way you used to. you can't just see him across the hall at his locker and mentally acknowledge that you get why girls talk about him the way they do. you can't just get paired up with him for an extremely long assignment and think oh, at least he's cute.

every story maddy's ever mentioned during sleepovers, everything she's teared up about after one too many drinks hits you at full force when your teacher reads your name and then his off of her list.

would she see this as a betrayal? it's not like you picked him and asking for a new partner is out of the question, a fact your teacher made clear at the beginning of the year. but maddy's loyal...fiercely loyal, and she expects that kind of commitment to be symbiotic.

you don't move, can't move until jules leans towards you, so close her hair spills onto your desk. "no fucking way." she whispers it in a way that'd make you laugh if this was about someone else.

you're silent, eyes finally pulling away from a brightly colored poster explaining the roles of each branch of the US government. you turn your head enough to look at where nate sits, the back of the room with a few other football players.

he's already looking at you. and when nate realizes you're finally staring back, he has the audacity to let the corner of his mouth pull into a smug sort of smile you're sure another version of you would have considered swoon worthy.

you're all instructed to use the last few minutes of class time to talk to your new partners, to make some kind of preliminary plan. nate's standing up and you're still recovering from the whiplash.

helplessly, you look over at jules who's clearly trying to get to the other side of the room before nate can get to you. she mouths a "sorry" that feels genuine, and points at the girl she's supposed to work with in a way that feels like over kill. you roll your eyes, picking up your pen and pressing the pad of thumb against its side to have something to do.

nate's in front of you before you know it. he's so tall it's a little intimidating when he's right there, especially with you still sitting. "you're everywhere now." a reference to the fact that you were both at the same party last weekend. you can still hear maddy's slurred i can't believe he's fucking here, before she dragged you out to the house's patio.

he's probably seen you more places. you're around maddy pretty regularly these days and from what you've heard, you wouldn't put stalking above him. he's probably a stalker in the way guys from the news are stalkers, calm and untouchable until they feel like the girl they're watching is moving on. then they snap and some news anchor reports that there were warning signs for months beforehand.

you're partially aware of your potential exaggerations, but you can't bring yourself to care. you've never really interacted with nate, but you want to hate him as more than the monster you hear about when maddy feels like ranting. you want to viscerally hate him. it's such an instinctual tug that you can't pretend it's all about morality. you're craving innate repulsion the way an elementary school girl wants the other half of a magnetic necklace with the word "best" etched into cheap metal. it's kind of pathetic, but then again...

"not last year, or last semester--"

he's baiting you and you're completely aware and you still can't help yourself. "what? it's illegal to make new friends now?"

your tone surprises you more than the fact that you interrupted him. you've never been overly shy, but you've also never been much of a fighter on your own behalf. maybe this is like the parties and barbie-style-bought-shirts, just another facet of the improved you.

nate seems surprised too, only he wears it like there's something funny about it. "no, you've always been friendly."

he says it like there's a joke in there that'd make the football players a few rows back laugh. it digs at you more than it should. he gets under your skin in a way that bugs. maybe that means genuine hatred is on its way.

you look up at him, eyes as unimpressed as you can manage. "so," the word is definite, intentional. "the project..." you're glad for the excuse to turn your attention back to your notebook, "i don't know if you want to work out a time to--"

"i'm leaving in like five minutes." you're about to point out that class doesn't end for another when he explains, "football game." ugh. another thing you can decide to be annoyed about. your homework schedule is now going to revolve around high school football. "can i get your number?" the idea of existing in nate jacobs's phone feels so wrong you can't immediately reply. he picks up on your hesitation, because he tacks on the one phrase that could get you to do anything, "35% of our grade."

you nod once, expression as blank as you can manage as you write out your phone number on the corner of a page. You tear off the bottom corner and hand it to him. "don't save my number."

it's so rude, your jaw almost drops, "what?"

"you're going to see maddy before the project's over, right?"

the implication immediately makes your stomach knot. you're not--you can't not tell maddy. she won't like it, but she can't hold a random partnering against you. and--and it's worse if you don't tell her, because then it's like you're sneaking around with nate. and it's--it's all for school.

"i'm not going to lie to her for you." it's so ridiculous, you can't even hold eye contact. his silence adds a second loop to the knot in your stomach. "why would i lie?" your own genuineness sickens you, you're backtracking immediately. "and--and it's just a dumb school thing, so she probably won't care that much."

"and you're sure she's going to believe that?"

"yes," the word is firm because it has to be. "because that's what it is."

"she gets paranoid."

no, no--he's doing this to get into your head and cause problems. "if she's paranoid it's because you're crazy."

"fine." he shoves the scrap of paper into his pocket. "save my number, don't save my number. tell maddy, don't tell maddy."

you sigh. "why do you care?" they're broken up...even if maddy takes it the wrong way, the fall out will be a you problem.

"she's going to think i fucked you to hurt her." you hate this--the situation, the conversation, the fact that you can't completely dismiss his train of thought. "who's known maddy longer?"

you're about to try again, to defend your friendship with maddy and call him crazy again when the static of the intercom speakers interrupts you. all football players are being called out of class to leave for an away game. nate gives you one last look before turning towards the door.

when jules slips back into her seat and asks if you're okay with everything, you nod and attempt a joke about catching fuck boy germs, but it doesn't come out the way you want it to. she still laughs, so you do too, but that's not as natural as it should be, either.

----

lmk if you like this concept/want more of it!! i had fun writing this :))

[andhumanslovedstories]

Hi Sarah (or Sara? I remember you discussing the h but don't remember which way it's spelled). I hope you're doing well on your break and enjoying September. I have a question - how much schooling did you have to do to become a nurse? I'm considering becoming an elementary school teacher in Norway, which would require me to go back to school for 5 (additional) years. Seems like a long fucking time and i didnt do great the first run tbh. It would be free though. Investment in the future seems like it could pay off, so i guess im looking for inspiration from other ppl who have perhaps made a similar plunge

Hi, anon! I wish I could give you some straight up inspo. Instead, I navel-gazed for a while. Schooling-wise, I already had a (completely unrelated) bachelor's degree so I was able to do an accelerated nursing program after two semesters of community college doing the prereqs. I did struggle in nursing school. College has always been brutal on my mental health and nursing is a hard pivot from my original degree (double major history and english w a concentration in creative writing) (you cannot imagine how many books I read and essays I wrote). It took a little over two years in total.

You don't have to don't have to worry about student debt which is so so wonderful. I didn't have to either, and that's let me be way more adventurous with my life choices. The cost of your education would just ("just") be your time, energy, and the potential money that you could earn by focusing on work instead. I had to stick around in my hometown instead of going traveling with Cyrus. I worked a lot fewer hours than I would if I'd not been in school. I had to miss the live airing of the Jesus Christ Superstar on NBC in order to study for an anatomy test which was genuinely so distressing to me. 2018 was a hell of a year for me. (I aced that test btw. It was such an improvement over my previous test my teacher emailed me a congratulations note with twelve exclamation points.)

All of this while people were constantly talking about how shitty it is to be a nurse and how so many of them leave the field within six months. (Similar to teaching in that way, at least in America.) I was doing work I didn't enjoy for a job I might not stick with. There were a lot of times I resented nursing school for interfering with my life.

I'm still very glad I did it. My degree gave me a lot. On the very practical side, my degree has given me more financial freedom and a much higher earning potential. On the idealistic level, my degree has enabled me to do work that I find meaningful. The work touches a lot of things that I find interesting. My nursing degree has benefited my life, regardless of if I stay in nursing for the rest of my career or move on to something new. I didn't like getting my degree, but I don't regret that I got it.

Maybe it'll go way easier for you, maybe it won't be worth it. When I thought about becoming a nurse, it felt like my life plan clicked into place because it ticked every single need I had for a job. I didn't know if it would work out, but the rewards outweighed the risks. More than that, it was the first plan I had for my future that made me excited. I liked the life I pictured if I was a nurse. I've found that excitement to be rare and precious. If teaching gives you that, I'd strongly consider pursuing it.

Besides, you can always use my last-line defense against school despair: being like "fuck it I'm gonna drop out after this semester" and then keep not doing that. You can bail on stuff! It's rad.

[tubbypeddle]

Hi again!! I loved the matchup thank youu!! Now I'm wondering though if you maybe have any headcanons for what the part 5 characters (Bucci Gang and/or La Squadra 🤭) would be like with an autistic s/o 👀?

Hi again!! and how cutteeeeee <33 I'm autistic myself, so honestly i'm just projecting here how i want them to treat me teehee

(author's notes: credits to gif owners, of course <3

Without further ado, hhehehehe

Bruno Bucciarati

He doesn't always understand why you do the things you do, but he always always makes an effort to be patient.

He'll eat the food you can't, he'll listen to you ramble and ramble and show genuine interest. He's basically the perfect partner.

Sometimes, when he's out running errands and finds something related to what you're hyperfixated on, he'll get it for you if he has the cash.

When he's making food for you, he's careful to make only food that you'll enjoy eating. Many chicken nugget and mac and cheese dinners.

He's a little firmer with you than he is with the rest of the team, when it comes to you getting hurt. It's because he worries more for you than he does about everyone else. Not only are you his partner, but he feels responsible for your safety. If something happens to you, it's because of him.

Leone Abbacchio

Honestly, he might make you feel a bit bad at first, but it's not on purpose. He doesn't know what autism is, or how to handle people who have it.

But he learns to. Because he feels bad when Bucciarati tells him that he made you feel awful.

So he goes out of his way to research how autistic people feel, why they act the way they do.

Because of his (kinda outdated) research, interactions with him might feel so so scripted. He means well, though.

When you're feeling overstimulated and like every little touch could set your bones on fire, he's happy to just sit in silence with you. As a silent reassurance that he's still here for you. Or even if you want space alone, he'll let you know that his door is unlocked for you, if you want to come to him later.

You're his favorite person, he wants you to know that he's here for you.

Giorno Giovanna

He's autistic himself, even if he doesn't know it.

So he understands you a lot better than everyone else will.

He lets you talk whenever he's available for you, and he often makes time for you in his schedule too. He does a great job making you feel special to him.

Often times, the two of you will sit in relative silence, just existing in each other's presence. But sometimes, when he feels especially jittery, the two of you will infodump on each other about your special interests. He just rambles on and on about the Mafia and what he plans to do with it, and then he'll listen to you ramble about whatever it is you're interested in.

He has a bad habit of eating foods that he doesn't like the texture of, leading to him shutting down or feeling gross afterwards. Mostly because in his childhood, it's either he ate what his house had or he starved, autism be fucked.

It's something you slowly nudge him out of, with much stubbornness on his end. Internalized ableism is so fun, huh. /s

Pannacotta Fugo

He definitely already knows he's autistic himself, so he often does things for you that he himself would enjoy happening to him.

He gets you gifts for your special interests, or he'll research your special interest so he can talk about them with you.

He's very anxious all the time, scared he might hurt you or do something to hurt your feelings. You might have to reassure him very often that you're not scared of him.

His favorite thing to do with you is read together. Like a little book club with just the two of you. Or even writing little essays about things you like so you can read his thoughts and analyses on them. Or drawing with you, even if he's really bad at it. Art composition was his worst subject when he was in school, after all.

He didn't have any hyperfixations before he met you. Which was a little boring for him, even if he spent most of his time trying to survive the mafia anyway. But after meeting you, you became his favorite person. And then you become his new hyperfixation, and you're all he can think about ever.

It's very infuriating for him sometimes. (in the good way)

Narancia Ghirga

Another case of "doesn't know he's autistic".

He's the loud kind of autistic. Socially unaware, but emotionally available to everyone. It's no surprise that he feels himself drawn to you.

He'll talk if you don't want to, he'll eat everything you don't want to (even if he doesn't like it). He just really wants you to like him.

He absolutely lets you indoctrinate him into your special interests. He likes whatever you like, and more! He might accidentally talk over you, just because he's so excited to finally have someone to talk about his interests with.

He means well, though.

Absolute cuddler, all the time. So if you're not that big on physical touch, he'll find another way to cuddle you. He'll put a big body pillow between the two of you and hug that instead, just so he can still be next to you and still hold onto something like that.

Never say that Narancia doesn't have his moments.

Guido Mista

He's very open-minded most of the time, so he handles you being autistic very well.

He handles all of you little "quirks", as he calls it, very well, too. His mentality is "if you don't like it, you don't like, and if you like it, great."

So if you don't want to eat something because of texture issues, that's fine, he'll take it. You don't want to hear something because it feels like glass on your skin, he'll turn on something else.

It really is that simple to him.

He just wants for you to be happy, and if anyone gives you trouble for something that you can't help, he'll shoot them. Easy as that.

[yuri-is-online]

Host With the Most (Vil Schoenheit x Yuu)

Intro

notes: they/them used for Yuu, in this house we love Vil Schoenheit and his pursuit of aesthetic beauty, Vil is very touchy with Yuu because he likes them, Yuu is a wee bit oblivious. Also happy New Year! Ha this took me too long to write. If you wish to see more of me, consider looking at my masterlist.

"As the default 'owner' of the Mansion it makes the most sense for Yuu to help me." Vil's voice has that firm air of finality to it that thunders through the air with the same force as Leona's roar or Malleus's storms. Speaking of Leona, he seems to be frightfully amused by this cute little attempt at imitation, and you have absolutely no desire to see them cat fight.

"Just what help do you need exactly? I'm not really the best choice for an understudy." You try your best to keep any trace of tiredness out of your voice, but you really should know better than to lie to Vil by now. He ignores his argument and cups your face in his hands to get a better look at your skin, pursing his lips ever so slightly to try and avoid a full frown.

"You really need to have more faith in yourself." The scolding is serious but the genuine affection in his gaze as you involuntarily chase his touch as he takes back his hands is real. "And to get more sleep. With enough practice you could be more than worthy, but lucky for us both that's not what I had in mind."

"Awww beta fish already claimed little shrimpy? Laaame." Floyd blows a raspberry and you stick out your tongue when Vil looks away.

"No chasing shromps for you." That cheers him up. You think.

"Stay!" Crewel seems to have regained a bit of his fire. "Ramshackle is Yuu's home, so having them work alongside Schoenheit will allow them to keep an eye on all you puppies and make sure you aren't destroying their living space."

"You have no need to worry yourself over such a thing Professor." Rook cheerfully says.

"Yeah! We're good house guests." Laughs Ortho.

"... Schoenheit perhaps you would like to take Yuu to look over costumes and explain your plans while I have some words with my third and fourteenth reasons?" Vil does not need Crewel to tell him twice.

~~~~

"We aren't planning on using any rooms you or Grim do regularly, though Rook and Floyd did have ideas for the attic." Vil immediately starts talking shop as soon as you leave the classroom. "Guests are going to walk though the house on a marked tour, and I'll be playing host for part of the show."

"A ghost host?" You expect to be reprimanded but Vil winks.

"In my first script the host had an assistant, but Ortho suggested he be placed in charge of screen mapping and projection so we didn't need to make as many adjustments to your dorm." Vil sounds just as proud of Ortho as Idia would be if he was telling the story. It fills your heart with warmth. "Thanks to that suggestion I get to have you stick with me for the rest of the week." And just like that the warmth floods up to your ears, damn that professional training for letting Vil say... things. Yes just things, you are reading into friendly banter too much. The way your breath hitches at the gentle ghost of his touch across your back as he guides you through the door he opens is natural, you just aren't used to Vil's touchiness yet.

"Have you already thought out the costumes?" You remove yourself from his side and try to place some distance between yourself and your feelings by looking over the fist set of clothes Crewel has laid out in this empty classroom, completely missing the brief flicker of disappointment Vil refuses to contain.

"I provided Professor Crewel some concept sketches and my script, but we still have some sizing adjustments to make..." Vil's voice trails off and you turn back in concern. Yet he does not seem distracted at all when you do, he simply proceeds with his thoughts evenly. "I hope you don't mind, but the costume I have in mind for you is raven themed, so you might end up looking a bit like our dear Headmage."

"Oh please no." You groan and Vil laughs.

"Just the bit." He moves to your side, directing your attention towards an admittedly sleek tunic like outfit with a hood and feathers embroidered down the cape. "Go ahead and try it on, I'll wait out here to look it over." As you turn to do just that you find his face close to yours, the typical intensity of his stares and danger of this specific smile suggesting something other than his usual ire. "And make sure to tell me if it's comfortable," he gently tips your chin up to look at him with a slender finger, it's as if he means to kiss you with how he tilts his head "you will be standing next to me for the whole night, I can't have my partner falling down from something as simple as fatigue."

Oh there is no need to worry over that when he is more than able to be the death of you on his own.

~~~~

The better part of your next three weeks is spent practicing the haunt and slowly loosing your sanity. You don't actually have any lines, or much of anything to do other than follow Vil around really, but that meant you had to spend more time around him. More time around those casual touches and compliments that have invaded your friendship since your trip to the underworld, battering your imagination in directions you had long since tried to convince yourself was forbidden. Vil is beautiful, and his confidence of it strangely not off putting to your foolish heart. But Vil had been clear, he was affectionate to all of his friends in private and no amount of skirting the boundary-

though it was all him, if you could only realize how he is trying so desperately to initiate that he is starting to come unglued

-would make your desire for his love anything less than a pipe dream. A dream made substantially worse by how you did know just enough about what one of his kisses would feel like to fantasize about tasting him on your lips. Not that you could see them from your position at the back of the test group, clammy hands fidgeting with the prop lantern you carry, but his slicked back hair and strategically rumpled suit are so ingrained in your dreams at this point you're sure you know what he looks like.

As if you are the only one tortured by fantasies, as if he did not design that cape specifically to see you in it. As if-

"Horntoads and lizards, fiddle and strum. Please answer the role by beating a drum!" Cater's head begins to "levitate" up off the table as he chants in a show of theatrics that's still impressive even if this is the 999th time you've seen it; Ortho's projection mapping coupled with Cater's willingness to improvise had blended into a really unique act. Something a Scarabia freshmen seems to really agree with you because he immediately starts screaming and flailing around in a way that has you deeply concerned for your poor dorm's safety. You take a deep breath to steady yourself, trying to examine the idiot's body language to determine if he was a threat or not. A decision that's made for you as soon as he goes for his magic pen and you note, perhaps too late, that maybe you should make your guests surrender them before going through the haunt.

"Excuse me." You make sure your cowl is lowered as you gently try to tug his hand away from his pocket and are rewarded with an easily dodged slap. "Well now you're just embarrassing both of us."

"Just what do you think it is you are doing foolish mortal." You swear you saw Vil walk forward, but your brain refuses to register his movements as soon as he opens his voice. "It seems you would prefer to take my way out after all." It's silly, being impressed with a professional actor staying in character, but then it must be equally silly to go a bit jelly legged at seeing Vil drawn up to his full height and radiating confidence. The student whimpers and you again reach for his hand, acting the good spirit gently tugging him away from the grip of the damned souls of the mansion.

"C'mon now, no need to be shy." The student lets you lead him away mutely, clearly disappointed in himself.

~~~~

"And I will see you all a little later." Vil bows, disappearing from the group as they flow into the dancers and he immediately drops his practiced face and begins making his way to his next scene. He has faith in you, so he is not surprised to see you waiting, cowl once again up and swinging your lantern to amuse yourself in a manner that would be cute if he wasn't so worried. "Yuu," Vil does not love how forceful his tone is for the way it makes you jump but the emotions running about in his chest keep him from softening it "are you alright?"

"Just peachy." You try a chipper tone but choke as Vil once again reaches to touch you. He cups your face in his hands like it is precious, examines it careful and runs his perfect fingers along your arms to examine your hands in what feels dangerously close to an excuse to hold them. "Dumbass," he purses his lips "sorry, po-ta-to thought Cater had actually lost his head because of Riddle or something. I made sure to hand him over to Crewel and suggested we take the guest's magic pens to make sure if they do freak out no spells get fired off."

"In hindsight that seems like a rather obvious precaution." Vil exhales, letting out the disappointment and intakes a prideful, teasing look to his eyes as he continues to focus on you. You swallow thickly, how many times has he said what he's about to in these past few weeks? "You're doing an excellent job, I knew I picked the right person to partner with." You look down at your hands, Vil still hasn't let them go. It hurts somewhat, more than nearly being slapped.

"You don't have to say things like that just to make me feel better." You cough and Vil frowns.

"I don't give compliments for the sake of ego you know." He lets go of one of your hand to run his thumb over your quivering lip, staring deeply at the tears you had not noticed until he moves to dry them as if he can erase them from time with sheer will alone. "When I say something to you about how grateful I am to have met you, that I admire you, when I say I find things about you to be beautiful and that I want you to stand beside me, I mean every word."

"If you say things like that I'm going to start thinking you mean something different when you call me your partner." You try to joke and for some reason this is what makes him falter.

"... wasn't that obvious?" Vil, beautiful Vil, has a genuinely surprised look on his face. As if he was not the one who had said he was affectionate to his friends specifically... as if he had expected you to notice how much longer he spent kissing you than Rook or Epel and divine his romantic intent from the way his hand sought yours alone. Perhaps he had thought you had more courage than you did, or perhaps, you think to yourself with some relief, there are some things Vil just doesn't quite know how to say because he is so used to having to prove himself worthy of saying them in the first place.

"Are you sure you want this?" You ask because you feel like you have to, but what you are really trying to ask is if you are allowed to want this, to want him.

"Dangerously so." He rests his forehead against yours, a contented sigh worming its way past his lips at the lack of ambiguity in the way your fingers finally thread through his. "I only have so much time left to keep you to myself you know? When the school year ends I'll have to make excuses to more than just a handful of classmates for why I deserve to be alone with you, without sparking any comments." You had considered that of course, let it fuel your doubts and even still now it flickers slightly in your mind.

"I don't want to take the coward's way out." You say and Vil's eyes betray momentary shock. "I don't want to keep ignoring my feelings."

"Then we are in agreement, my dearest partner." Vil draws you impossibly close and presses one kiss to your forehead to his joy and your rancor before he dips you to give the kiss you really want. "I don't think I could ignore you if I tried."

Welcome, foolish mortals, to this haunted taglist: @nothingfuninthislife

[sabh0]

What's your opinion on the anime? I find it pretty funny, but I can't say that I am not disappointed to see so many scenes missing.

For exemple, I wanted to see Dazai cry laugh at Chuuya's young mistress act, show that it was a joke shared by both of them, rather than one made to us at the expense of Chuuya. They took a genuinely funny moment and made me cringe SO hard for no reason T^T

God i could go on for hours about how Bones ruined this series. I'm obviously thankful we have an anime adaptation but. Well just compare bsd anime to jjk one or smth and yeah.

I will be complaining more under the cut,,

First the overall writing choices:

-Deleting or changing skk scenes to the point im not even shocked when ppl think these two actually somehow hate each other.

-The way they portrayed Sigma. They deleted half of his personality and backstory. And just speedrunned the Sky Casino arc like if seeing that place was giving them nightmares. No wonder he gets mischaracterized now.

-Tachihara's internal conflict about belonging to either Port Mafia or The Hunting Dogs? Bones never heard about it. It's not like IT'S A VERY IMPORTANT PLOT POINT.

-Akutagawa's whole character in the anime is just 'edgy and angry and bad grr'. In the manga he had some 'kind' or even seelf-reflection moments that were ommited in the anime. Like where he realizes defeating Atsushi didn't satisfy him (ship fight, season 1). Or when he gives files about the orphanage Director to Atsushi and says he won't fight him today because he lost someone impirtant to him. Sskk vs Fukuchi fight?? No scene where Sskk r helping each other walk. Instead we get Akutagwa just pushing Atsushi away. Won't even start on that last smile that looked more like another angry expression.

-THE WAY THEY CHANGED "DAZAI'S ENTRANCE EXAM" INTO SOME CURRENT TIMELINE EPISODES. IT MAKES ME SO ANGRY LIKE. THIS NOVEL WAS SO GOOD. Showing both Dazai and Kunikida's characters and partnership so well. But no. Let's just??? Put Atsushi there. Let's delete the fact this thing happened 2 years ago. And let's delete everything that was actually important about it, too.

-also some changes in the Dark Era arc. Like. Lord. Dazai is so much more emotional in the novel. His expressions r described so well. But the anime either shows him from the back at those moments (him finding out Oda was almost killed by a sniper in Ango's room) or just deletes/changes the thing (Oda dying. This scene is so emotional in the novel. From the description u can tell Dazai was crying/on the verge of it as Odasaku died. But in the anime he looks calm and then we get a far aeay frame and he just. Gets up and that's it yeah.) They also deleted the scene of him visiting Oda's grave.

-The way they rushed seasons 4 and 5. Just to give us an episode that goes further than the manga and has the shittiest writing ever when it comes to skk's plan revelation (im so angry about this u guys have no idea. I sincerely believe that if this episode never came out, the manga would go differently bc there's no way that Asagiri who wrote things like Stormbringer suddenly thought that some dollar store vampire make up will fool a guy who's centuries old and literally lived next to vampires. But well!! Seems like these two speeches Dazai gave weren't important at all and now we can just forget about them yippiee)

I could definitely mention WAYY more examples of that but this is already long af. Like guys. I know u cant fit everything in an animated show. It takes time to make it and all but. Bro. The character's in the anime r so shallow compared to their original versions.

.

Now onto the artstyle of the anime.

Lord. U know? It was actually pretty in the first 2 seasons. The official arts at the time were also really nice to look at.

No idea what happened later. Why did Bones suddenly decide that those ugly turtle smiles r gonna become the main thing in the character design. Why so many fisheyes. Atp sometimes i look at the official art and i go oh lord even i could fix it. It really feels like they draw some characters ugly on purpose now (Chuuya being the main victim for unknown reasons).

Tho i must say they have their moments even now. Some last episodes of season 5 weren't really bad, especially the Meursault part (love them for animating Dazai and Sigma dancing so well. And for that 101 animation. And maybe for the heartattack they gave me with 109 and Chuuya shooting Dazai so many times.)

.

On some other things, i really like the music! Bsd openings and endings never miss,,,

[crosshatchedaces]

My scrunkle (Fracturing Time Mikey) may have lost in the @rottmntpeepawpolls but he still loves his boys, even if Leo likes driving him up the wall.

I don't have a comic for ya since he lost, but I've got this and some random FT! facts below if you're interested in my ramblings

• I was originally actually going to do a F!Leo back in time fic! I had some ideas on what to do, it was going to take place during the movie, but the ending I had in mind was kinda sad tbh so I didn't go with it (though I do have a oneshot with all three going back instead now). Plus, there were already so many beautiful Future Leo fics out there!

• I then realized that there was quite literally only one other one of Future Mikey that I could find at the time (Mystic Hands), so I wanted to explore that idea more and give F!Mikey more love because he deserves it! I thought it would be a fascinating idea to go with too!

• This fic had originally been planned to be 10-15k long and just a short exploration of what could happen. The plot had been pretty different at the time as well, but it quickly got out of hand in word count.

• A part of the former bullet point was because I couldn't really find any Future Mikey fics to read lol so I just kept building upon my own. I also wanted to explore what his interpersonal relationships would be with each of the turtles, so he will be spending more time with Raph, Mikey, and Donnie in future chapters (currently it is at chapter 9 at the date this is posted).

• I love the idea that the movie parallels how Donnie and Raph died in the future, hence Donnie's death protecting Mikey in the fic.

• I have around 12 more chapters written out so far (just not checked over).

• I've tried to make most things that happen in the fic have some sort of connection with future chapters in some way, even some subtle, seemingly insignificant moments.

• I went out of my comfort zone with this fic. I wanted to do something bolder, something more plot heavy and what I wouldn't normally do, because I love reading fics like that. I often feel that I fall back on writing domestic aus, even though I'm not as interested in reading them, it's just what I was comfortable with.

• If I could go back, I would probably condense some of the beginning and make it pov alternating (but! I have snuck some moments in there, one of which is very soon).

• This fic is on a mini hiatus for a few weeks. I am neck deep in projects at the moment and work a full time job. I need to focus on those first before I can continue it, but I should hopefully have another chapter up in the foreseeable future.

And that's what I can think of for now! I'm not sure which person(s?) nominated FT!Mikey to be in the peepaw polls, but I want to thank you, it means a lot to me that you consider him to be up there with the other peepaws! He barely made it in there (32nd entry) lol but he's there!! I'm so glad there's fans out there that genuinely enjoy the story, and everyday I wish to continue it for all of you, you all keep me so inspired!!

I hope you all have a wonderful day, stay safe and cozy out there, everyone!

[genericpuff]

I'm curious - how many unanswered asks do you have in your inbox? Or do you just delete the ones you don't plan on answering?

do you feel good anon

do you feel good about yourself with this question

targeting me like that

geeeeez

ok but more seriously LMAO i have an embarrassingly large amount of unanswered asks but i do read all of them <3 a lot of them honestly are just from folks like, sharing their anonymous opinions about either LO and LR, with the odd one about comic advice, sharing webtoon recommendations, and other things of that nature!

In the case of the LO asks, it's stuff that often has already been spoken about at length before so I don't really have anything to add (but trust me, I'm usually in total agreement, if I heavily disagree with a take I'll usually try to respond to it but it's rare that that's the case because most of the takes are just things like "wow the art in this panel sucks" like yep it sure do LOL) and often it just feels like my inbox is just like, a comment box for people to get their feelings out anonymously and honestly that's fine, I just also can't really respond to every single one unfortunately, but I do read them and I love y'all's takes!

With LR asks, y'all are way too sweet to me and send me just the kindest things about LR, and I hope y'all know that even if I wind up not getting back to your ask about it, I do read everything you send and appreciate so much the amount of support you've all shown for this project since I took it on <3 A lot of those asks are literally my version of "do it for her" where I read them and it reminds me of why it's so worth doing what I do :') <3

Whenever people recommend me other works to read, I add them to a list and I am currently trying to tackle it :) (honestly that list isn't as big as you'd think, a lot of the recommendations are for the same stuff, like other Greek myth retelling comics or otherwise just bad webtoons that people want me to suffer thru LOL) I just recently finally got a physical copy of Song of Achilles and while it's slow going, I'm gonna be sharing my extended thoughts about it, either in a big Tumblr post or maybe a video if I can motivate myself to do it 🤔

And of course, the comic advice asks... these ones admittedly I do tend to actually move into my drafts because I really, REALLY do want to respond to them, but I'm also not someone to half-ass responses to questions like that. That is a bit of a bad habit on my end because it often means I'm spending crazy amounts of time going over topics that can be researched, but I also just really love talking about comics so it doesn't feel good to get a comic advice ask and just leave it at "idk just start" like yeah, do that, but also I want to pass on all the things I WISH I had known when I was first starting out and I'm glad people see me as someone to learn those things from! So when it comes to those asks, don't worry, I'm picking away at them <3 (but also man, I should probably just like... put together some kind of hitchhiker's guide to comic making or something huh LOL)

Anyways! I do have a lot of unanswered asks and honestly, I'm not really one to delete them, even if I don't get back to some of them it is still nice to read them in their own little curated space separate from my main blog, it's kind of like a personal comment section between myself and those of you who took the time to write <3 The only asks I tend to outright delete are ones that are just like, way too bad faith to even want to give any attention to, or bot spam lmao But for the majority of y'all who have sent genuine asks to my inbox and never saw a response and worry that I might have ignored it or deleted it, I hope you can have reassurance in knowing that they are all still there and even if I can't make time every day to respond to them, receiving all your personal takes about LO and your amazing feedback and kind words about LR is something I'm always excited to see whenever that little notification pops up in my Inbox tab. I see you and appreciate you <3

[thedorkurge]

I wish you would write a fic that is purely durgetash being soft with one another- Their constant psychosexual power play and violence is fun, but I would love to see your take on how they would be gentle with one another. Durge comes to Gortash after a long night of killing, Gortash is stressed with the minutia of death cult office politics, and if that Dragonborn has to drag him kicking and screaming to bed so they can both just rest for a minute, then so be it. It’ll be worth it.

I'm definitely up for the challenge! Thank you for asking<3

It will be below the cut, or you can read it on Ao3

Durge wasn’t supposed to be here, not really. But what he was supposed to do had recently been partially replaced with far more dangerous thoughts of what he wanted to do.

And it was all because of Bane’s chosen.

Though they had no meeting tonight, no intention of furthering their plan for their masters, he still found himself crawling through Enver’s window. The sitting room where he would host his more intimate meetings was empty, meaning that he could only be upstairs, burning the midnight oil at his desk. 

Durge crept through the night, silent and unseen, in spite of his bright scales and tall stature. 

As predicted, Enver was still working. He had clearly been at it for a while, his inkpot already replaced once and his desk piled with papers. Their presence was spread fairly thin, covering both Moonrise and Baldur’s Gate, so copious amounts of correspondence was needed to keep their forces in check.

But even a mind as sharp as Enver’s will dull if it isn’t treated with care. And that would be a damn shame. The man was a fine dagger, one that could slice many throats before it wore out.

One that felt right in Durge’s hands.

He allowed himself that thought for tonight. He had butchered his way through the city today, providing his father with ample sacrifice. And Gortash had yet to notice him, so for now any softness on his face would remain his own.

The fact that he’d been sitting on the windowsill without any acknowledgement for a few minutes was more concerning than anything, revealing just how tired the Lord really was. As did the bags under his bloodshot eyes and the ink that stained his hands. Durge had no doubt that every letter was still perfect, carefully planned and put to paper, but while his work never suffered, his body did.

He was only human. A fact that Durge was all too aware of, for both good and bad. On one hand it intrigued him, the softness of his skin, the hair that lined his body, the way his flesh would depress softly under Durge’s touch in a way that scales and corpses didn’t. 

On the other, the man was fragile. He would hate that description, but it was true. Durge knew all too well how easily humans died, how little it took to break them. And sleep deprivation was one of the cruelest methods he knew.

He finally allowed his feet to touch the ground, fully entering the room and announcing his presence.

Gortash looked up, alarmed, if a bit too slow to react. When he saw that there was no threat, he turned back to his work.

Durge was almost a bit offended by that. But part of him didn’t really mind. It was almost refreshing to not be greeted with fear.

“I don’t recall us having a meeting tonight.”

“We don’t.”

When Enver finally looked back up at him with a raised brow, his stern face was ruined by the way his eyes squinted against the light. 

“Then to what do I owe this visit?” He finally placed the pen down carefully, clearly giving up on getting anything done with another distraction added to the pile.

“How long has it been since you slept?”

Enver seemed genuinely taken aback by what should have been an obvious question. “That hardly matters. Politics do not wait for you to sleep. That is simply an opportunity for your detractors to undermine you.”

“Considering that I’ve been killing your detractors, that hardly seems like a valid excuse.”

“I wasn’t aware that I needed an excuse.”

“I suppose you don’t.” The dragonborn circled the table, putting out the oil lamp that illuminated the paperwork. “But you do need sleep.”

Enver’s protests died in his chest as Durge pressed a hand to his cheek in a surprisingly gentle touch. He leaned into it slightly, clearly just realizing how tired his neck muscles were.

Durge’s voice was quiet, dampened to match the calm that had settled over the room. “Don’t torture yourself, Enver. That’s my job.”

The Lord managed a tired laugh, reaching up to hook a heavy hand around Durge’s. It was warm. Enver always was, the human’s temperature running significantly higher than his own. As Enver repositioned his head slightly to push his forehead against the colder hand, Durge realized that he was probably too warm. 

He helped him out of the nice, but uncomfortable, clothes gently, secretly hoping that Enver wouldn’t mistake his actions as sexual advances. If Enver was to initiate something and Durge turned him down, Bhaal wouldn’t approve. Sex and murder were the two things he was never supposed to turn down, even from a banite. Fortunately, Gortash seemed to have other things on his mind, allowing this moment of intimacy without the heavy judgemental gaze of their gods weighing on them.

Before they could lay down, Enver pulled him into a lazy kiss. It was tired, it was sloppy, it wasn’t meant to stoke passions or assert dominance. It was simply because they wanted to.

With that, he pulled the lord into bed, gently folding arms that were meant to kill around fragile human bones. Enver held him close in turn, practically unconscious by the time he hit the bed. With a wave of his hand Durge extinguished the last light, allowing the darkness to hide them from the eyes of the world as he pressed his lips against the top of Enver’s head.

[honeygrahambitch]

hii, sorry to bother, i just wanted to let you know i love the way you write and your characterizations. Do you have an ao3 or any fics you're writting or have written already? i would love to see them!

Praise is never gonna bother me- did I get too comfortable on this app?

Anyway, thank you for saying this <3 I am really happy if people randomly come across my fics and end up liking them. Most of them are written in 30 minutes before I'm off to sleep so I'm aware they are not very complex or well-written but they exist mostly because 1) I have so many thoughts 2) i write them as a response to stress and 3) because there are so many of you who engage with them and it's genuinely fun.

Sorry about yapping, to answer your question: yes, I do have an ao3 account - @ honeygrahamcracker - but I am not active yet. There are some completed works you can go for though. I plan to post something more complex soon.

If you do want to read more, search my blog for the #blue writes tag. I am trying to group all my works under it.

[separatist-apologist]

I just read an article in that guy who murdered two women. Absolutely horrifying. All the booktok crazies fawning over him reminds me of the women that would write letters to Ted Bundy while he was in prison.

I wasn't gonna answer this because I felt like I said what I needed to say and like, I was just preaching to preach but THEN while I was asleep, an anon came into my askbox to accuse me of not being a girls girl while intentionally missing my point. I blocked them before I thought of a good comeback (tragic) but like fellas is it anti-feminist not to stan a man who killed two women because (and this is so important to me) he hates women?

I'm gonna put the rest of this under a cut with a heavy trigger warning for domestic violence, I just want to say it and then I think I'm done talking about it because it's genuinely so disheartening.

Anyway, I think sometimes I get nervous to answer these kinds of asks because as a therapist I should know better than to speculate on people and what they're going through and whatever else, but as a person, its like...do you want to be picked that badly?

I think we all know by now that I work in DV and all the people fascinated with men like this fuck me up because like..."oooh what makes him tick, I want to talk to him, why did he do it-" and for me, I sit on the opposite end talking to survivors of violence asking the same questions with hollow eyes, with shaking hands, with safety plans meant to buy them just enough time to get out of their house so they aren't killed. I still think about some of the people I spoke with who didn't survive it.

When I was in grad school, I took a summer internship at the local DV court helping survivors with orders of protection. The system was set up better than a lot of other courts, but its still the legal system, you know? With all its flaws. My job was to flag for lethality based on what I was reading in the OPs and then reach out directly to survivors to help them navigate the process, connect them with resources, and sit with them in court. And I still remember this one particular woman who's situation was so desperately dangerous. We did a safety plan- and at that level, a safety plan isn't like, "remember to take your keys and wallet with you when you go", its "don't go into the basement or bathroom if he's in the house with you because there are too many hard surfaces, exposed pipes, and basins of water that making killing you easier. Go to a bedroom or closet because strangling a person is really hard and takes time," like THAT kind of safety plan. Anyway she thanked me, I remember this so well, she said thank you and I told her I'd call her the next week with an update and over the weekend he bludgeoned her to death.

And I guess I just don't think there is anything fascinating, interesting, or otherwise unique to men like this (obligatory yes I know women kill/abuse too). They're everywhere. I saw another post about how some podcaster is trying to get him on to talk to that guy and its like, why don't you just call up one of your friends' exes. Like. If you've got more than one female friend, you've probably got a friend who has experienced violence at the hand of a male partner, call him. Talk to him. Ask him why he did it, let him give you his made up story about trauma and sadness and oh life is hard because whatever whatever.

That's my thing. Books, movies, tv- they're not making people like this, and I'm not condemning people for what they enjoy in fantasy spaces. I am condemning it when you bring it out of those spaces and side against the women who were violently murdered because, and this is so important to me (did I say this already??), he HATES women. You are not special. You cannot fix him. He's not smart, or interesting, or fascinating and the having an attractive face is literally just chance and not something inherently moral.

And like, lastly, when you prop these men up and give them a platform, you signal to EVERY man just like him that there is something special and tragic about him. You let him play the victim, you let him rewrite the narrative, you shift the blame of his actions off of him and onto the people he hurt. Like with this particular man, you also side with a white supremacist so what are you saying to all your BIPOC/Jewish friends/mutuals, you know?

Anyway. That's my self-righteous rant, I guess.

[lightlycareless]

i was re-reading the naomi meets toji fic and i'm just imagining naomi seeing toji and calling him toji-sama but she is with naoya instead or toji sees naoya interacting with naomi

Heya!!

Awww I'm glad you liked it!! And yes, I think I was due writing their interactions :> Naoya could not have a child and not introduce them to Toji, the #1 person he admires in the whole world. Though I think someone here would not appreciate it as much...

Anyways, here are the warnings: none. it's nothing but silly domestic stuff. Though I kind of feel bad for Toji. Also, he might be ooc; I don't really write them but I hope it's still good!! You and Naoya have a baby girl named Naomi. Also, please read this first if you want to get context behind the Toji-sama thing.

Happy reading!!!

The moment Toji sees Naoya and Naomi interact is when everything just makes sense to him. Where he realizes that not only she really is his daughter, but that she actually takes a lot from him.

From their physical appearance to everyday habits, there is no doubt in his mind that Naomi, indeed, is Naoya’s child.

Specifically with that endless yammering the two seem so fond of partaking in.

Toji was conflicted. In one hand, he knew what to expect from kids. They were naturally irritating, so for him to demand otherwise would only gather him with the likes of his ignorant family (and he’d rather die than to do so).

But another part of him hoped that she would take more after you, you know? He’s seen you interact with others, heard the rumors too, how everyone once thought it impossible for someone like you to be with someone like Naoya. You were just too… different. Nice, even.

Yet, here you were, married to an arrogant brat and having kids with him—children that were on route of being chibi Naoya’s, bringing in more havoc than there already was.

And there would be no one to know better than him, after all, since he got a prime example of that after being caught in the middle of their antics one unsuspecting afternoon.

“Toji-kun!” A bright-faced Naoya exclaims while bringing along his equally excited daughter to greet the mysterious, brooding man who just had his plans of passing undetected effectively ruined. “When did you return? You should’ve let me know; we could’ve gotten something to eat together!”

“It’s not like I’m you to be announcing my arrivals and departures…” He murmurs under his breath, yet Naoya still manages to hear it, enough to laugh along.

“I can change that, if you like. Give you the treatment you deserve.”

Toji’s left eye twitches; looks like even after settling down, the ungrateful kid he saw grow up continued to be as ridiculous as ever.

Though it seems your husband now faced competition, and from his own daughter no less.

“Hi, Toji-sama!!” Naomi cheerfully greets, waving her chubby little hand at the man and making both her father gasp, amused by her unforeseen reverence, and Toji chuckle, glad to see that the antics he fueled many days ago still stood strong.

"Hey, kid."

“Toji-sama?” Naoya repeated, genuinely surprised. “How come I never thought of that?”

“That wasn’t an invitation to call me so.” Toji warns.

“Hmm, I guess so. Toji-kun seems to be more fitting anywa—”

“No, papa! It’s Toji-sama, Toji-sama. He wanted to be called that!” Naomi protests with a pout, tugging at her father’s hand to further highlight her words. “Papa…”

“Alright, alright.” Naoya chuckles. “Toji-sama it is—"

“What? No, only she can call me that.”

Because it would be nothing less than obnoxious to hear such words coming from a grown-ass man, specially one as Naoya who was already too much by his own merit.

A type of inner-joke where only Naomi was participant; Naoya could try his luck somewhere else.

“Papa, papa, can I play with Toji-sama?” Naomi would suddenly suggest, making Toji’s heart sink.

Thankfully, your husband wasn’t the jealous type. No, wait, let’s rephrase that. He wasn’t the jealous type with his daughter. Willing to let her go if it meant getting something even better in return!

“Of course you can!” Naoya encourages, enthusiastic at the prospect of two of his favorite people spending quality time together! More so if he was there to see it. “What would you like to play, mochi? Hide and seek?”

“No, papa always wins…” Through cheating, that is. Using his cursed technique to quickly catch up to her, barely giving her any time to hide—it’s safe to say that he’s effectively ruined the enjoyment out of it.

Unless…

“Toji-sama, you seek, we hide!” She offers instead. “But no peeking! No cheating like papa…”

“Now, why would I even agree to—"

An important thing to remember is that for all of his life, Toji considered Naoya to be, deep beneath his arrogance, a coward. The type of man that would throw a rock then hide his hand just to see the chaos he could evoke. But always free of accountability, of course. Doing so countless times just for the laughs of it, careless of who he affects with his actions.

A threat to never take seriously, just a wimpy kid he had the misfortune of sharing blood with.

But that seemed to change with his daughter. In fact, what transpired succeeded even his own expectations. When he once believed him a devoted follower of Naobito’s footsteps, he now presented a certain… overprotectiveness towards little Naomi, subtly growing frustrated at the prospect of upsetting her—and thus, willing to do anything to keep her happy.

Now, isn’t that interesting?

Consider him… not intimidated, never. But rather… intrigued. Enough to indulge your daughter, letting her grab him by the hand and guiding him to whatever garden she concurred to play in, coincidentally, your personal favorite—where you’d often rest after a long day of tending to duties, or simply wanting to bask in its tranquility.

Though as of lately there appeared be a unusual heaviness looming over your body, making everything far more difficult that it really was. A part of you wanted to blame it on the universe, accept that sometimes things happens because they do! Nothing more to it.

But another side of you wants to consider what your staff has been playfully teasing you about: Hinting that your sudden change doesn’t come from fate, but rather… another bundle of joy on its way to you.

And it made sense if you thought about it too! You were presenting the exact same symptoms of your first pregnancy!

Yet, that wasn’t possible. Because you and Naoya had been very careful when intimate, having long planned to have a second child once Naomi was a bit older.

…

…

But you wouldn’t mind hearing another set of footsteps following you everywhere. Another baby for you to cherish, Naoya to spoil, Naomi to play, and Toji to—

Wait, Toji?!

“What in the—” you breathe, eyes wide as you observe the unusual image of your family playing with the man that often kept to himself unfolding before you. And apparently willingly as well! … Kind of, you were still able to perceive a slight annoyance coming from him, undoubtedly overwhelmed by your chattery daughter and pleased husband—the habit of showing off what he’s proud of is something that followed him since he was a child, and always, Toji had to be in the receiving end.

Good to see that some behaviors are never truly gone.

“You found me, Toji-sama! You found me!” She giggled, the opposite reaction of what one would expect.

“You weren’t that hard to find…” He raises an eyebrow.

“It’s my time to look for you now!” Naomi cheers, this is certainly turning out to be much better than she expected! For her, at least.

“She’s amazing, isn’t she?” Naoya boasts. “Nothing seems to stop her!”

“She reminds me of you when you were young.” Toji quietly perceives, Naoya’s eyes glisten.

“Really, Toji-kun?” After being given the greatest compliment yet, there’s no way he wouldn’t be over the moon. “Well, she is my daughter, aren’t you, little mochi? Naturally, you have to be as talented as me.”

“Yes!” She nods, blushing when Naoya gently patted her head. “But let’s play, papa! I wanna play!”

“Only after giving Toji-san a small break.” You eventually interject, walking over to the group and standing by Naoya’s side, who immediately wrapped his arm around your waist, as usual. “I hope my husband and daughter haven’t exhausted you much.”

“Ah, we could never, right Toji-kun? We were just having fun!”

“Mama, are you gonna play with us?” Naomi asks. “Come on, mama, Toji-sama said he’s going to seek us this time!”

“Really? I thought I heard him say he wanted to eat…” You tease, Naomi pouts. “Also, don’t call him that, pumpkin.

“No, he didn’t.” Naoya responded in defense of his daughter. “He just—”

But you quiet him by gently elbowing him, letting know he was overextending his cousin’s tolerance, much to his dismay.

“I mean—he did mention he was tired” Toji raises an eyebrow, confused by the words that were randomly put in his mouth, though he won’t deny he thought them. “We’ve been at it for a while now, pumpkin. Aren’t you tired… or hungry?”

“No.” Naomi frowns. “I wanna play!”

“Really? Not even for your favorite? Mariya-san said she was going to make it for you…” You insist, forcing Naomi into a predicament you knew she wouldn’t be able to deny. “And we wouldn’t want to keep her waiting, right?”

Naomi’s eyes widen, licking her lips at the thought of her favorite meal.

“Ok mama!” Naomi chirps before looking over to Toji. “Goodbye Toji-sama!! Let’s play later!”

“Naoya, take her please, I gotta do something first and then I’ll join you.”

“Alright.” Naoya kisses you before leaning close to your ear to whisper… “We’re not really eating, are we?”

“We’ll talk about it later.” You smile, kissing him back.

“Bye bye, Toji-sama!!” Naomi says once more, taking a hold of her father’s hand soon after and disappearing into the hallways.

Once alone, Toji takes this moment to sigh, take a breather from doing things that weren’t really on his itinerary, and probably head back into whatever isolation he had planned for the day—right after dealing with you, that is.

“I’m sorry about that.” You say, taking a step closer to him. “Believe me, I know all too well what it is to be overwhelmed by them.”

“As if one Naoya weren’t enough… They’re exact carbon copies.”

“I’ve been told.” You laugh. “Sometimes I wish Naomi looked a bit more like me. If just a tiny bit, you know? I did carry her for 9 months!”

“Well, she’s likable compared to Naoya, I’ll give you that.”

“Hey, Naoya can be likeable too!” You jest back. “He has his charms.”

“I’m sure he does.” Toji responds, suddenly reflecting on Naoya’s overprotectiveness towards his daughter—a trait that no person would expect from him after seeing him grow up.

Yet, he was proved wrong. And not only in the realms of parenthood, but those of marriage as well. Naoya showing that people can change, even when coming from a hideous background as his, if given the right motivation.

A small hope for the Zen’in clan, he supposes, all thanks to you.

And perhaps… a purpose for himself, too?

“You have a good kid; you should be proud.”

“Oh, I… Thanks.” You blush, taken aback by his compliment. “We try our best.”

“For my sake, don’t tell Naoya I said that.”

“Never. My lips are sealed.” You smile. “But…  only if you promise to do something for me.”

Toji raises an eyebrow.

“Don’t encourage my daughter to call you by that honorific.” You ask. “I fear someone of the family has begun to feel… offended by it.” Though jealous would be the most appropriate word.

“Why? It’s only deserving.” He laughs.

“Well, maybe you can try it out when you have kids of your own.” You chuckle. “See if you like it.”

“I don’t think I’ll—”

“You’d be a good father, Toji-san. I now have no doubt about it in my mind.”

Toji blinks, speechless and confused by your words, but most importantly, unable to demand an explanation for you’d begin to retreat soon after, leaving him behind to deal with his doubts by himself.

“Well, I gotta go now, I’ve accidentally burdened Mariya with my daughter and I can only imagine the reaction she’ll have upon learning we’re not having her favorite good!” You say, waving him goodbye as you walk away. “See you around Toji-san!”

Maybe he should’ve run after you, stopped you and demanded justification behind your outrageous accusation. Or maybe he should’ve refuted your ideas without consideration in the first place, catalog them as silly, for there is no way in hell he’d enjoy entertaining a child, and all that it took to get there…

… Though an exception could always be made if it was his child. He’d definitely like to do things to tease them, annoy them; get them to pout and whine, just like brats often do, and get a laugh out of it.

But most importantly, give them a life worth living. One vastly, greatly different from his, like the one he deserved at one point, and save them from all the suffering in the world.

Toji laughs, shaking the idea out of his mind as he heads somewhere, far away from the estate, it doesn’t really matter as long as he’s alone…

To eventually admit that perhaps… he would like to have a bit of that happiness you shared with Naoya—

If there even was someone for him out there.

Imagine being the reason Toji has baby fever hahahahahaha omg that is so sad. But hey, he deserves to be happy too :')

Also, my favorite thing here is that as much as Naoya simps Toji, he'll always put his daughter first. Not sure if someone was questioning this, but here is my answer. I mean... I would hope his family goes first... 🤨🤨 if not, we're going to have a problem lol.

Anyways, thank you so much for sending in this ask!! It was such a joy to write Naoya boasting about Naomi, and Naomi following Toji like her papa did when he was young hahahahaha really, they're identical twins; what a nightmare for him 🤣🤣🤣 owww I wan't to write more about them 🥺❤️

Now, take care, and hope to see you soon!!

[kirishimasbabygirl]

Therapy Session

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

A/N: Hey Guys! This is the last part of my three part series! I hope you enjoy it! After this part I'm going to be doing a poll on what I should write next! I don't really like how this one turned out, I'm shit at happy endings lol

TW: Swearing, Angst, Kind of a Happy Ending

HERE'S Part 1 Part 2

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

You and Katsuki have been going to your therapist, Dr. Reo, for a month, and he is trying, like, really trying.

He's been on time for these appointments, doing the exercises your therapist has given him, and has given you the space you need.

Hell, he even slept in the guest room for you, but he still hasn't answered the big question.

"Now, Mr. Bakugo, the question still stands after this past month I've seen the two of you; why did you cheat?"

You looked at him expectingly, leaning on the opposite side of the couch from him, arms crossed.

He had been asking himself this question many times this past few weeks.

Why did he do it?

He wasn't drunk; it wasn't that he wasn't satisfied by you; god knows he is.

"Because…" he thought to himself because I could.

He felt his blood run cold; he did it…because he could.

He had control over a situation and did it because he could.

"Because I could. I had control for the first time since I'd become a hero and made it to the top 10, Hell, since the wars in high school." He slumps back into the couch.

"Since I was a kid, the minute I got this power," He looks down at his hand, rubbing his scared fingers together.

"My life, my future, was already planned out for me, and I could get away with everything."

He lets out a shaky breath as tears gather in his red eyes.

"I thought I could get away with using that woman, that I could get away with hurting the love of my life all because I thought I could. Like I always do."

He looks out the corner of his eye to see you staring at him in horror, tears streaming down your beautiful face; he fucking hurt you so damn bad.

"Because of… what-" you croak, hands shaking as you bring them to your face, hassling, wiping the tears away.

"But!-" He adds, straightening up, reaching out for you, clasping your hands together.

"I don't…I don't want to feel that way." He looks at you pitifully

"Please…Please believe me."

You had nothing to say.

Dr. Reo nods his head at the blond.

"Well, that's progress, Mr. Bakugou; maybe you should take a step outside, take a breather while I talk to the Missus for the rest of our session?"

He stares at you a bit longer to ask if that is okay; you nod your head, dropping your gaze.

"Okay," he whispered as he dropped your hands and slowly stood up; he never took his eyes off you.

"I'll be right outside if you need me, okay?"

You have a tight-lipped smile; you can see him deflated at your reluctance to speak to him, nodding again as he exists in the room.

Dr. Reo focuses his attention on you.

"So, this is one of our last secluded sessions. Do you want me to be honest with you?"

You nod, fiddling with your hands; you can still feel his callous fingers on them.

He sighs at you, pulling his glasses off and placing them on the coffee table in front of you.

"Ms., I firmly believe that Bakugou needs one-on-one therapy; he's hoarding some deeply rooted issues; I can recommend a good hero specialist therapist if that's something he'd want, but as for your relationship."

You lean forward, hands on your knees.

"He loves you and feels genuine remorse, but it's up to you," He points his finger at you.

"Whether or not you forgive him."

You sigh, head falling; you want to, you do, really.

"I do, trust me; it's just…" You raised your hand and rubbed your face. "I'm just scared."

"Of?"

"Of him doing it again?"

He raises an eyebrow at you. "Are you asking yourself or me?"

That gave you pause.

"I… I'm scared of what people will say or how they'll look at me like I'm some pushover or a gold digger who'll let him fuck whoever as long as I get his money or some stupid shit."

You've read the magazines through the years the two of you have been together, you've seen all the clickbait titles on youtube videos and drama channels, and you know what they say about you.

He nods

"And he'll do it again like you must have seen her; she's a top model!" You laugh pitifully.

"And you were pro-hero Natural Disaster."

Your face dropped; you rather forget about your hero days.

"You love him?" He questions, you nod

"Do you want this to work out?" You nod again

"Then go make it work." He waves at the door

"It's gonna take a lot more than me to fix this, and even after all that work, you still don't have to forgive him."

You look over at the frosted glass door to see Katsuki's silhouette.

"This has been hard on both of you; he's moved out of your shared bedroom, avoided him, and refused to speak more than one sentence unless it's here."

You watch him pace back and forth in fount of the door, a nervous tick he has.

"By those actions, you're showing him that you don't want this to work, yet he comes to every meeting for you."

You feel your heart break while watching him.

Has he been this anxious since what happened?

The timer blares out; Dr. Reo leans over and taps his phone.

"Go; he needs you."

You nod numbly, slowly standing up.

The door opens, and there he is, waiting, and like clockwork, he extends his hand out for you to take, which you've been ignoring for a month, he knows you won't take it, but he tries.

'He needs you.'

He's surprised when he feels a soft, warm hand entangle with his callous and scared one.

He looks at you, but you refuse to meet his eyes; you might cry if you do.

"Let's go home Katsuki."

-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-_-

His lips quiver, eyes welling up; he throws his head back, staring at the office's fluorescent lights as the tears run down his face.

"Y-yeah, let's go."

Tag List.

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[thatoneneuvichiliauthor]

So I'm personally a fan of fics where the characters react to their show/game/book/etc, and how they react to the things they never would have otherwise seen. What im saying is, In what ways do you think ratio would react to seeing aventurine in that last update? Seeing his past cutscenes that got shown, his conversations with his future self and seeing Aventurine's child form as well. Because theres so much there that ratio never would have gotten this perspective on otherwise and I have to wonder how hed feel about it. He probably already guessed that Aventurine had a rough life since he knows he used to be a slave, but thats different from seeing it first hand in his memories and to hear him basically admit to himself that hes tired, wishes that fate didnt curse him with his blessing, and really just wants to die. Like theres so much to explore here, especially from the view of Ratio who genuinely wants to help humanity seeing this

Oh that's a good question! The first thing that comes to my mind is that the more Aventurine expresses his desire to die, the more Ratio would be stressing out about the possibility that he might forget to open his note, that Aventurine might never know that someone did care. And he would be beyond relieved once Acheron does remind Aventurine to read it.

As for him witnessing Aventurine's past, I think that after seeing everything he went through, he would feel kind of guilty for not realizing that the power of the Harmony would put him back through all those bad memories and for not being there for him as he slowly fell apart (even though Ratio staying away and pretending he didn't care was part of Aventurine's plan). At the same time, he would also be impressed by Aventurine's resilience, by how he managed to make it out alive despite all the odds that were pitted against him. It would confirm what Ratio already suspected: that Aventurine is far more clever than anyone gives him credit for.

Most of all, I think Ratio would be dying to find a way to reach out to him, even in a situation he knows it isn't logically possible, because he sure cares so much for Aventurine, though he might not be the greatest at expressing it. I can also see him scribbling on his tablet as he writes down everything he should say/do the next time he sees Aventurine, because the last thing he wants is to screw it up and to make Aventurine feel even worse about himself.

(Oh, and after seeing all that, he would be furious at Sunday for the psychological torture he put Aventurine through)

I'm sure there would be many more things to say about his reactions, but this is what first came to me after reading your ask! And once again, thanks for sharing your thoughts about them with me 😊

[maaarshieee]

⎯⎯ ୨ 𝐊𝐧𝐨𝐜𝐤 𝐤𝐧𝐨𝐜𝐤? ୧ ⎯⎯

➢ Tɪɢʜɴᴀʀɪ x Gɴ!Rᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

➢ Mᴀsᴛᴇʀʟɪsᴛ

a/n - HONESTLY KAZUHA AND XIAO WAS SUPPOSED TO BE WRITTEN FIRST BEFORE TIGHNARI but like, my boo (/p) had a really good idea so i wrote a fic for it HDHDSAHDAS, wrote this in class LMAO, took a small break from writing so I'm tryna warm up again to write more after my fuck ton of projects. titled "knock knock?" have a good day/night!!,, part 4 of marshie's oneshot/drabble after his character analysis :)

Now, Tighnari was never the jealous type.

What's there to be jealous of? Other than those who are stupid enough to wander in the forest empty-handed, blissfully ignorant of the dangers until he had to take care of and lecture them for eating a poisonous mushroom even if he already advised them to read the Avidya Forest Survival Guide, jealousy was not something Tighnari was fortunately not familiar of.

Well, that is until you met Cyno, much to his dismay.

It was during one of his many visits to Collei at Gandharva Ville when the two of you bumped into each other accidentally. He happened to crack a joke whilst he was about to take his leave and you burst out laughing. And it wasn't just any laugh he's heard from you, you were near to tears, clutching your stomach and gasping for breath.

You genuinely thought his joke was hilarious, and he could even see the slight twitch at the corners of Cyno's lips, wearing a proud expression on his face.

That's the story of how you, a fellow Forest Ranger and Tighnari's lover, became friends with the General Mahamatra. Cyno, for one, would visit a lot more often. Tighnari asked you one day, about his frequent visits, and you answered; "Oh, we just tell each other jokes 'till he gets back on his responsibilities." With a bright smile on your lips, you wrote in your little notepad as you thought of more silly jokes, before adding, "Never knew he'd be the funny type. I thought you told me his humor was quite awful."

They were, your humor is just terribly in a match with his. He wanted to say to you, especially you talk about him like that; with a smile on your face, occasional soft chuckles under your breath, and a shine in your eyes. How absurd! You should be like that to him! Your boyfriend! The one who you said was the love of your life?

But he (thinks) doesn't care much about you bonding over with Cyno. In fact, he's glad Cyno met someone who actually appreciates his jokes and his attempts to appear less intimidating. Seeing both of you interact encouraged others to approach the Mahamatra with less fear.

Unfortunately, Tighnari can't shake off this heavy feeling in his chest. His brows would crease more often, his tail swishing side to side irritably and his ears would twitch or droop the more he thinks about it. Was he worried? Perhaps, but what would he be worried of?

Was it the way you perk up when you see him walking up to you? The way you laugh so hard you almost topple over? Or was it—

Oh. Oh.

He was jealous, wasn't he? Of Cyno, of all people.

Now, a rational and wise man like him would speak of you about this matter. As much as he puts so much faith in you, and trusts you because he loves you with all his heart, he just can't help but feel jealous when you look like that when you're with Cyno.

But when it comes to you? Let's just say he's looking for a way to win back all your attention back to him.

Finally, Tighnari understood one quote he's heard from other scholars back when he was still at the Akademiya. "Love makes you do foolish things." But what was it that Tighnari was planning?

It has been a few days since Tighnari came to terms with his jealousy, and you've noticed this new behavior he's developed. More often than not, you'd see him pondering, a hand on his chin, lost in thought. Then, out of the blue, his ears would perk up, as if he had come up with a good idea, pulling out a notebook from his bag and starts writing it down.

You respect his privacy, so you never took a peek at his notebook, but your curiosity is also quite strong. So you asked him about it. "This? Just a new notebook to write new discoveries, notes, and all sorts of things." That was what he said. How he treats it tells a different story.

He'd always make sure he'd have the notebook with him, closing the book when someone would walk toward him, and would occasionally write in it only when he was at a far distance from others. It was odd, but you never pried, mostly because whatever it was, it couldn't possibly be harmful to anyone.

You just took it as a new part of him. Still, curiosity would always win you over.

After getting injured in one of your patrols in the forest and getting patched up by your doting boyfriend, Tighnari (along with a lecture, of course), he let you stay in his tent to rest while he went back to his Forest Ranger duties. He happened to forget to bring his little notebook of secrets with him, leaving it near you.

For a while, you fought your curiosity out of respect for Tighnari. But you found yourself slowly inching towards it and before you knew it, you had the notebook in your hands.

You felt quite ashamed of yourself, face flushed and gulping. But a small, quick peek wouldn't hurt, right?

No one could have prepared you for the contents of the notebook. Before you could even properly process it all, Tighnari came back to the tent. "Sorry for disturbing your resting, but I forgot my—" His eyes landed on you, then trailed down to what you held in your hands, "...notebook."

There was a long, moment of silence between the two of you. Your eyes were as wide as an owl's, perpetually shocked by what he has written while Tighnari averted his eyes from you, ears twitching and his cheeks lightly dusted with pinkish hues.

Then, you let out this loud snort, wheezing out loud laughs before falling back onto your cot. The notebook that was once in your hands was quickly snatched by Tighnari, the heat worsening on his face as he felt both embarrassed and irritated (not really) by you, clutching the book to his chest.

"Oh, my Archons!" You managed to say between laughter, coughing into your fist as you tried to sit up, hand on your chest and catching your breath. He had never seen your face so red before, with the biggest grins stretching your lips and the tears forming in your eyes glimmering under the light. Tighnari felt his heart skip a beat, tail unknowingly wagging behind him. "You have a joke book!?"

Tighnari cleared his throat, sitting next to you whilst he held the notebook close to him while you stared at him with expectant eyes. Honestly, the things you do to him. Just that enthusiastic look on your face, full of amazement and adoration, makes his knees weak.

"I observed how much you find these horrid jokes hilarious, seeing how much you've been with Cyno just to exchange these jokes." He explained himself, letting out a rather annoyed sigh. "Honestly, I don't get why you think they're so funny. I'm simply writing them and I could feel myself get a headache from how hard I'm creasing my brows-"

"So, what you're sayin' is, you're jealous." You bluntly stated, sitting with your legs crossed, chin resting on your palm, and wearing a smug expression on your face. Tighnari choked on his words, giving you a half-hearted glare while his face blew up in flames. He was sure he was as red as a tomato at this point.

You weren't wrong, but he just couldn't admit that out loud to you. Especially with you. You'd never let it go.

Nudging him with your elbow, you chuckled at his expression. "That's really sweet of you." You mumble, scooting close to him with a loving smile. His breath hitched, leaning closer to you. "Why don't you tell me the rest of the jokes you've written so far?"

And with that, Tighnari opened his notebook once more. While Tighnari personally thought the jokes he'd written were repulsive, seeing you laugh at the jokes he wrote for you? To hold onto him to not fall over, complimenting him for his 'amazing' jokes? He wouldn't mind making a couple more.

After all, he's caught your attention once more. You're laughing at his jokes now, and he's never heard such beautiful sounds in his laugh. Your laughter was something he never knew he needed in his life.

Yeah, I'll write a few more. He thought, a tender smile on his lips whilst he watched you slapping your knee, wiping the tears away. If I could make you laugh like that, then I wouldn't mind.

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[edensrose]

˚◞❀˳ a proper farewell

god that title sounds dramatic as fuck so let me just clear things up immediately: no, I'm not leaving tumblr, I will still be very manageable to reach and interact. what I am drifting away from is the tolkien fandom — and since this place, despite my hardships, has meant so much to me - I decided to give it a proper little farewell, to the people who made everything count. along with a little explanation for my decision while shedding light on my experience. ( I'll try to be brief )

I joined the tolkien fandom while writing for thranduil, it's here I gained my following in the fanbase and things went quite smoothly. however, upon beginning to write for mairon, then melkor and then later the ainur — I saw an increase in hate anons. something I have experienced before, natural of a multi fandom blog, but never to this degree. initially I assumed it was because I was simply growing larger as a blog, and perhaps that is the reason — but from what I noticed, I was battling with a bunch of chronically online people who simply could not handle my love for. . . "problematic characters"

I never understood it, really. I never saw other ainur blogs getting the hate I did - I guess I'll truly never know. had I done something? was my writing just not good enough? were my vibes off? over the time I've been called things like two faced, fake, a romanticiser of abuse, lazy for not filing out requests, been told I shouldn't write reader inserts, told to kms and other graphic incidents ( such as people sending death threats and actual gore to my inbox ). this branched from burner accounts to anons, and I could just never understand why me. a quick gander at the #clownon tag and you'll find some of the instances in which I've been harassed.

I genuinely thought my writing was the issue.

which demotivated me from writing for quite some time. could I have turned anon off? sure, but that would have meant that the anons I'd frequently interact with would most likely not come around anymore. it meant a decline in requests, it meant just a crippling factor to my blog in general, so I chose to ignore. but it got hard to eventually. I was bullied for liking a god with big wings just because for crying out loud.

I've tried to fake being okay. fake being strong and unwavering about the hate, but I just couldn't anymore. and that's okay.

it wasn't all tears and hardships though. I have made very good friends through the tolkien fandom, many of which I consider close. from @bluezenzennie to @kiatheinsomniac — @a-contemplation-upon-flowers , @cilil , @someoneinthestars and so so many more. it'd take me forever to tag and honestly my heart is squeezing so much listing these few down already. they made fandom fun, whether it was our silly little play fights or collabs or you name it. those of you that have spent time to tell me about your day on anon or send in the nicest of things. I haven't forgotten them, and I cherish them, but it's time for me to go

am I sad? fucking of course. a part of me found so much comfort here and in these characters. I've spent hours on end developing lore for aus or designing aesthetics for writing — just writing and pumping out content or blogs, everything and anything I could do. and while I don't regret those times - the way I've been treated in response hurts. which is why I've made this decision.

I'm growing as a person too. I'm writing a book now, I've got an oc blog to promote that book that I'm working hard on ( @valentine-cafe ) , things are looking good. does this mean I'm just gonna disappear? of course not. I plan on staying around, getting back into request writing ( for other fandoms ) and still interacting and supporting my tolkien moots and friends. will I be writing or creating content for tolkien? probably not. at least not in the foreseeable future. the characters I once loved and cherished have now been ruined for me. I've been made to feel embarrassed for loving manwe and namo to the degree that I have, and I don't see myself being able to write for ainur without thinking of all the shit I've gotten for doing so.

regardless, I'll be here still. and while I might not be your local valarfucker anymore, I hope to be your rose still 🩷 thank you so much for two and a half years, I love you all dearly