#like ok on the netflix movie alone i could on for hours

[lizzieislife94x]

Road Trip (e.o)

Lizzie x G!P reader

If you want any requests just message me

Lizzies POV:

"Let's go hoooooe" I beep my horn over and over waiting for my bestfriend y/n she takes so fucking long this bitch she literally said I'm ready come pick me up and she's not ready I love her but sometimes I wanna strangle her "ugh finally I've been waiting 10 minutes" I huff turning to her as she laughs "calm your panties lizzies let's get this show on the road I'm so excited" she leans over to hug me as I pretend I don't want her too she's so fucking beautiful I love to spend as much time with her as possible so 16 hours on the road alone in the car is perfect, she's had my heart for the last 5 years I've never had the courage to do anything about I don't wanna ruin our friendship I love her to much but I can't help but constantly check her out "ok I forgive you loser let's go, I'll drive the first few hours then we can find somewhere to chill and sleep then you take the next few hours tomorrow and so on" I explain we could easily do the 16 hours in one go but this trip is about us spending a few days together because we don't get to see each other often "that sounds perfect lizzie" she smiles sweetly god her smile, we start our drive talking and enjoying each other company laughing like mad men

 Y/ns POV:

"No way your boss said that??" She asks in complete shock I can't help but giggle "yeah he did can you believe he thought I wanted to sleep with him I've worked there for 3 years and the idiot hasn't realised I'm into women" I say smirking at lizzie "yeah no offence y/n all anyone has to do is spent 20 minutes with you to know your a lady lover" she says in a flirty tone I laugh and sigh leaning my head back against the head rest, yes lizzie I'm completely for the ladies but I only want you, I think as I would never tell her that I don't want to lose her and if I let my stupid feelings get in the way I'd lose her she'd never speak to me again "hey give me your phone I wanna put music on" I say as I rest my hand on hers andshe smiles "its right there y/n" she says pointing down to where the drinks sit, I grab her phone and unlock it "awh we are so fucking cute" I say referring to the photo of us as her lockscreen and I think she's blushing "we still have 2 hours to go wanna stop and get some food and blankets and pillows" she smiles at me "yessssss babes sounds like a plan to me" I jump excitedly in my seat and she giggles at my antics we pull in to Mcdonalds and get some food after half an hour we walk over to target to get blankets and pillows "ohhh lizzie we should get snacks for watching Netflix" I suggest "that's actually a great idea" we grab lots of snacks and drinks and I grab a box of tissues incase lizzie needs to pee "let's go find the perfect spot to set up by the time we get there the sun should just be setting " I say in a calm tone "mmh I love the sunset its so beautiful " lizzie says as I pack the stuff into the car

we spend the remaining 2 hours in a comfortable silence occasionally chatting about stuff that we could watch, we've settled for big momma and big momma 2 she always gets her way but fuck she's so precious I could never say no to her, we find the perfect spot and park up with a perfect view of the sunset I grab her hand as we sit and watch it until it disappears "let's get the car all cosy and we can set up the movie" I whisper as I get out and open the back doors and put the back seats down and fix a few blankets down so we're comfortable I then fix the pillows and grab a few blankets to cover us "everything's ready ma'am just need your laptop" I say smiling as lizzie gets into the back smiling "this is beautiful y/n" I blush and look down "I'm going to get stripped I normally sleep naked but obvs I'm not over the next few days so is it OK if I wear my boxers and sports bra?" I question shyly and she giggles "of course that's fine y/n same here as long as you don't mind me in my bra and panties" I gulp and blush at the thought "no uh thats fine" I whisper nervously and strip my clothes off leaving me in my boxers and sports bra I climb into the back and get under the covers after a few minutes lizzie joins me as I set the laptop up and play the movie.

Lizzies POV:

Fuck I'm trying to focus on the movie but I can't y/n is half naked laying right against me thank god she fell asleep because I'm panicking here "mmh there fuck.." wait a minute is she moaning Holy fucking shit I notice the blanket poking up and instantly lift it to look under fuck she has a hard on yep she was definitely moaning "fuck lizzie..take it ju..st like that" I instantly freeze was she moaning my name fuck I feel the wetness instantly pooling in my panties "lizzie..uhhh god yy..es" the sound of her moaning my name alone is enough to make me cum fuck, I need to wake her up "hey y/n wake up babe y/n" I whisper shaking her as she wakes up and opens her eyes wide as she sees me "oh hey lizzie is everything ok what time is it " god  even her saying my name now I'm only gonna think of her moaning it 

Y/ns POV:

I woke up and instantly knew I had a hard on shit I hope she doesn't see it I had a sex dream about lizzie it's nothing new but I freaked out inside when she woke me up because I've never had a sex dream about her while she's laying beside me I move a little and try to hide my dick "where you dreaming about me" I freeze as the words leave her mouth how does she know "you where moaning alot and you moaned my name" she says as if she read my mind "I'm so sorry liz I had no control over my dream please don't hate me" she giggles and pulls the blankets off and climbs ontop of me oh god what is happening "oh shut up and do something about it" I smirk and unclip her bra letting her perfect tits fall out I automatically latch my mouth around her nipple as she grinds into my raging hard on "fuck lizzie that feels amazing" i moan against her nipple as she continues "lizzie you are fucking soaked I groan" she blushes and looks into my eyes "how do you know y/n" I smirk and bite my lip "your pussy is that wet its soaked my boxers I can feel it on my cock " i tease kissing her neck "ugggh just fuck me y/n I've waited to long for this" she moans as I flip us and take my boxers off and slide her panties off fuck the sight of her soaked core is making me harder "mmh fuck you look fucking amazing "I moan as I run my fingers through her wet folds earning a moan for my best friend "put it in y/n fuck me" I moan at her assertion and do as I'm told I line my cock up to her entrance and slide in slowly "fuckkk lizzie you feel so fucking good" I moan pushing my entire length inside the moaning blonde under me "yessss fuck y/n youre so big sh..it" I gave her a minute to adjust before I start thrusting my hips slowly making sure to hit the right spots as I thrust, fuck I never knew my best friend sounded so fucking sexy moaning my name "yes yes yes y/n right...there fuck dont fucking stooop" she screams as I pick up my pace fucking her harder and faster "I'm cummmmming oh holy fucking shit im cumming" she screams out like a pornstar I feel her pussy walls squeeze my cock as I hold back my orgasm and she cums all over my cock "good girl" I moan slowling my thrusts letting her ride out her orgasm "fuck y/n you feel amazing inside me" she pants out her hands gripping my biceps as she tries to steady her breathing, I keep my dick inside her and move her legs over my shoulder "do you have one more lizzie" I moan thrusting slowly leaning down to place a gently kiss on on her lips "mmmh yes definitely baby" she moans "fuck me fuck me please" I start snapping my hips hard and fast as the car shakes like crazy and my best friend screams under me fuck her pussy feels amazing I continue thrusting feeling the orgasm fast approaching "fuck lizzie cum for me I want you to cum for me before I fill your tight little cunt with my seed " I pant out staring into my best friends eyes and all I see is lust and desire "fuck fuck I'm cumming daddyyy" she screams arching her back as I continue to slam my cock deep inside her After one final thrust I start shooting my load deep inside my best friend and it feels amazing I've wanted this for the longest time, I lay beside her panting as I grab her hand "that was amazing lizzie are you on the pill?" I moan looking at her as she turns to me "yes it was amazing no one has ever made me cum that hard and nope im not" she smirks running her finger down my nose biting her lip. 

Well I guess there's a chance I just impregnated my best fried the thought has me biting my lip this woman is something else and god i love her.

AN: just to keep the book up to date if you like it let me know if you want a request message me I do them all right away babes word Count is 1.8k

[breezybangtanbebe]

Eye On You: Wonho❤️‍🔥

A/n: anyone ever sit back and think about how rich Wonho would be if he had an OnlyFan's account? Just me? 🌚 aw ok well....here you go🥴. I wrote this in like an hour so...

3.75k words

You never imagined you'd be the type to subscribe to one of these websites.

Hell, you barely liked forking over that $9.99 a month for Netflix and a small part of your soul died at the sight of that reoccurring charge on your bank statements.

But this felt different.

It was midday and you were alone in your room, writhing in bed as your body's reluctance to go to sleep frustrates you.

It wasn't as if you needed a nap but sleep was the only thing that could distract you from the insatiable ache between your legs.

So after scrolling on social media for a little bit, seeing enough of a particularly fine man's face and body on your timeline led you to fish out your debit card and open your laptop.

The cursor idles over the pixelated rectangle for what felt like minutes.

You've already created the account and input your payment information.

All you had to do was hit subscribe and an uncensored world of Wonho would be unveiled for your and 120,863 people's eyes only.

When you'd first seen him, you were amazed by the exaggerated definition of his muscles and undeniably handsome face.

Every Instagram post was either him fully clothed and candid, smiling or looking away as if he weren't aware of a picture being taken.

Or he was naked.

Ok, maybe not full-on ass-naked but he might as well have been.

Plump and pert glutes.

Thick muscled thighs.

Massive pecs that could easily fit in a d cupped bra.

Buttered Hawaiian roll-looking abs.

And then there was his....lower half.

No matter what he wore, there was never a reason NOT to look down at the sizable print that bulged in the most provocative way in even jeans or dress pants.

Him wearing a size smaller than his normal fit, no underwear, and sitting wide-legged in every picture didn't help either.

Don't even bother asking anyone what color his hair or his shoes are.

You damn sure didn't know.

All you knew was that when you realized this specimen had a Stream4You account, similar to OnlyFans, it only took a shameful 8 minutes for you to decide to subscribe.

The membership fee wasn't bad.

About as much as your Netflix subscription and you were sure to be much more entertained by this than the thousands of shows and movies you'd scrolled through.

Plus you could cancel any time so...

You click to enter the website and your eyes widen at the array of pornographic thumbnails from past streams.

"My gawd.." you gawk as you scrolled.

Well-lit 4K snaps of Wonho on his black leather couch.

Some of him alone, gripping his thick print in different colored boxer briefs.

Some of him with a woman in various sexual positions.

Doggy style with nothing but their naked torsos and legs in the frame.

Missionary with Wonho's massive upper body looming over a woman much smaller than him, their pelvis' pressed together.

Another with a view of the bare back of a woman kneeling in front of the couch and between Wonho's spread legs, his hand resting on the back of her head with his tipped back in ecstasy.

All of them different races and body types.

All of the gorgeous.

A pang of jealousy struck in your chest as well as deep within your clenching walls.

What an experience it would be to get fucked by such a magnificent man. You didn't even have to watch him in action to know he could fuck.

It was all in his aura.

You sigh, leaning back with your laptop resting on your tummy, scrolling down his profile with a pout.

Suddenly a notification bell pings in the corner of the screen, followed by a drop-down banner letting you know that Wonho was about to start a live stream in 5 minutes.

It's a shame how fast you clicked the link that led you to the waiting room which consisted of a black screen with a countdown, a sidebar with his past live streams in the queue, and a frenzy of comments popping off in a chat on the other side.

You immediately found the 'Turn off chat' option in settings because you didn't want anything distracting you from the main event.

After an agonizingly slow five minutes passed, the black screen shifts to an unexpected view of who you knew to be Wonho's glistening chest and sculpted abs.

He's leaning over the tripod, adjusting the angle from what it sounded like.

A second later, his beautiful face fills the screen.

"Hi guys...." he croons, smiling innocently in that way that reduced his eyes to slits and lit up his entire face.

His voice is deep and soothing, something you'd probably want to hear up close or in your ear first thing in the morning.

Wonho furrows his brow and tucks the soft pink tip of his tongue at the corner of his mouth as he goes back to fiddling with the camera.

"Bare with me a second everyone...I got a new tripod and I'm still figuring it out. This angle is not...ah..there we go." He huffs in triumph as he rights the camera in the way he intended.

He then kneels in front of his infamous leather seat. Not to be confused with his equally infamous black leather couch.

Wearing nothing but some black Adidas shorts and a smile, Wonho seats himself comfortably on the floor in front of the camera. He leans forward, squinting at it for a second before smiling and waving again.

"Can you see me ok? It's in focus?" He asks and you snort at the irony of him speaking so casually considering what he was setting the audience up for.

"Looks like I am. Anyway... Hi again. It's Wonho, your favorite. I hope everyone here is enjoying their day so far. I um....really have no plan for today's stream. I just got back from the gym and showered so I'm at home for the rest of the day. What are you all up to?"

Again, he was speaking to his audience as if they were coworkers or neighbors he say occasionally on his way in or out of his home.

It was...cute. Unexpected but cute.

Your brow crinkles in amusement.

Wonho smirks softly as he stared at what you assumed to be the comments, which were no doubt coming in by the thousands per second. His eyes squinted again as he read them, his smirk persistent at what his paying audience had to say. 

For a second you toyed with the thought of him asking you about your day with s genuine interest. He'd be looking at you the way he was looking at the camera now with expectant eyes and parted lips, hanging on to your every word.

" 'Just got off work.' Cool. 'Just had dinner..' Already? It's dinner time where you're at? I haven't even had lunch yet..'Hi, baby' Hi...' You're handsome' No you're handsome, whoever you are.." he chuckles cutely as he went through more similar comments before leaning back on his knees.

He lifts his arms and runs his hands through his hair, flexing his biceps and triceps unintentionally with the movement.

He then stands to extend his body in a stretch that gave you a godly eyeful of his body. Abs contract and quads flex as he stretched and your gaze falls to the plushy-looking hill that gathered at his crotch area.

He's not even trying.

After satisfying his muscles, Wonho exhales heavily and plops into the waiting seat behind him.

It groans under his weight and you could only imagine the things that chair had to endure being owned by this man.

On and off camera.

"Glad to hear all is well with you all. Thanks for tapping in." He says, resting his head in the nest of his interlocked fingers.

"As I said...I didn't really have a plan. I took a shower and had this urge to jack off but I didn't want to do it alone...."

Your ears perked up at the favorable turn of events and you reflexively push the laptop up to your chest.

"Oh..do tell," you mutter as if he could hear you.

"...So I figured I'd just get comfortable and do that while I chat with you guys until I cum. Or perhaps until you cum. Whichever comes first..." he jokes with a little chuckle.

His corny pun and little laugh alone should be considered a sin. How could a man so burley and huge be so cute at a time like this?

Wonho remains leaned back comfortably in his shorts that hung loosely from his tree trunk thighs, his hooded gaze fixed on the camera.

He lifts one of his hands from the back of his head to rub through his silky black hair again, mimicking the way you wish you could do the very same thing.

Beside him, an iPhone lays face down on the leather armrest and he picks it up, swiping his thumb over the screen a few times before focusing on reading the stream's comments from his own device.

Then he flashes that damned panty-dropping grin.

" ''Good plan' I know right? 'Deal.'  'Sign me up Coach. 'Cum first Daddy. I need frosting for my toaster strudel'...Wow. Nasty. And beautiful. You might have just inspired some future content with that one..." he says in response.

" 'Nice Tits.' Thanks. I work pretty hard on them so glad to hear it. 'Show us your dick please' Well since you're so polite.." he grunts.

Without wasting another second, Wonho lifts his hips to push down his shorts and underwear. They shimmy over his legs and drop out of view, leaving him shamelessly nude for the camera.

"There. That better?" He teases with a light-hearted chuckle.

As he continued to respond to comments, some funny and others nasty, your eyes fixated on the culprit of all of those damned likes on his Instagram posts.

Wonho's dick.

It sits lazily between his attractive man spread, not even erect yet but still impressive.

The fact that he's clean-shaven only allows you to appreciate his full size as you tapped the fullscreen icon in the corner.

Now filling your monitor, Wonho's muscular body and thick manhood captivate you entirely.

You'd never see a man so beautiful in your entire life and maybe it was your hormones leading you to exaggerate but...

"Shit..." you exhale, marveling at his size.

For a moment you wondered why he had so many subscribers. Beyond his good looks and entertaining content, you didn't think 120K for one guy doing normal amateur porn made much sense.

Until he took off his underwear.

Wonho's dick is gorgeous. Similar to his skin tone if he were blushing with a fat mushroom tip that looked like it had been kissed by lips stained pink.

Thick and surprisingly long to be flaccid. He reaches down to cup himself, ringing his shaft between his thumb and two fingers while his ring and pinky fingers rested over his balls.

Which looked heavy and smooth to the touch.

The thought has you nearly drooling on sight

Wonho slowly begins to stroke himself, the velvety smooth skin moving over his veiny shaft.

He readjusts his seating and spreads those massive thighs more for the camera, scooting forward so that the audience has a perfect view of all he was selling.

With his other hand, he holds his phone to read the comments. He smiles at whatever madness you imagined to be occurring in the live chat.

If you weren't already touching yourself, you might have been able to post a comment or two.

At some point the laptop materialized beside you on the bed, giving you the freedom to shuck off your underwear and caress your sensitive folds.

The pads of your fingers pass over your clit and you gasp, repeating the action in a rhythm mimicking Wonho's.

Slow and steady.

Teasing yourself just enough to arouse you more.

It's not long before Wonho's once drooping member is ramrod straight and standing up at its full length.

He's a grower and a shower.

My gawd.

Wonho pauses to reach for something on the floor and sits back up with a glistening glob of liquid from a dispenser off-camera. He drops the phone to clap the substance between his palms, warming the lube before reaching back between his legs.

His large hand encircles the shaft, twirling his wrist slightly on the upstroke that's now much smoother with the help of the lubrication.

Now his dick shined as if it were encased in glass, showing everything in greater detail. He jerks himself with the original hand, using the other to cup and tug his balls gently.

"Ah..shit.." he exhales.

His tongue runs over his top lip as he continued stroking, his chest moving with each breath.

Yours shuddered beneath your shirt as you rubbed over your clit in slow and teasing circles, but the wetter you become, the more stimulating your touch is.

A soft moan parts your lips and you spread your legs wider as if you were on full display for this beautiful man and not the other way around.

Wonho gets lost in his touch for a moment, not shying away from rubbing his perineum as he worked over his dick.

His head tips back and his eyes fell shut for a moment and you wondered what he saw when he did.

What did he think about when he touched himself? It's not like he didn't have a massive collection of savory images to recall from his past experiences.

You wondered what memories turned him on the most...

After a while of the same pace and some of the sexiest soft moans you'd ever heard come from a man, Wonho lifts his head and opens his eyes to gaze straight into the camera.

There was something different in his eyes now.

Long gone was the cute and funny guy with punny jokes.

There was now what you could only describe as a demon. The brown of his irises seemed black now and they hid halfway beneath his eyelids in a sultry stare that makes you clench around nothing with a pathetic whimper to follow.

"What the..." you pause, feeling as taken aback by his expression as you were by your body's reaction to it. 

A little smirk lifts at the corner of the demon's lips before he releases his ballsack. He does a quick wipe over his thigh to rid his palm of excess lube before picking up his phone again.

Wonho goes back to reading the comments, leaning over to rest his elbow on the armrest as he stroked his dick slowly.

His brows go up at something he read but he doesn't respond out loud, only sparing the camera a knowing look briefly with a sly smirk.

He then goes on to read more, his thumb strumming over the screen.

He laughs at something someone said and pauses to switch up his tactic for a moment, focusing just on the tip of his dick and stroking over it with a shuddered sigh.

This makes his eyes roll back and he curses under his breath.

By now, your clit was so hard and swollen that your legs twitched every time your fingers passed over it. Occasionally you'd slide them inside to stroke the ache away that grew from deep.

But you could only manage that for so long before feeling like you were about to cum.

And you know once you did that, it would all be over.

Wonho looks back at his phone and smirks.

" 'Stroke faster' Yeah? That's what you wanna see?" He asks breathily, his eyes never leaving his phone.

He then adheres to the request, most likely accompanied by a cash donation.

The tacky sounds of the lube slicking the motion of his hand kicked up as he jerked himself faster.

It must have felt really good because his smirk melts into him scraping his teeth over his plump bottom lip.

"Ah fuck...mhmm.." he moans, exhaling sharply through his nose.

You match his energy, strumming two fingers over your needy clit, hips rolling and back arching.

You moan louder now,  panting as the heat collecting at your apex mounts.

You were close and so was Wonho.

You could tell from the way he'd abandoned the phone to go back to sitting upright, the other hand groping his balls and rubbing under them. His dominant hand was doing what it did best, pushing him closer and closer with every upward stroke.

He cursed and moaned just as freely as you did and you only bit down on them so that you'd be able to hear him over yourself.

Not that it was an easy task.

Hearing him moan.

Watching his hips canting and his abs contracting.

Spotting the shine of pre cum dribbling from the hole at the center of his rock-hard tip...

You wanted him. You wanted him so fucking bad that it sparked tears in your eyes knowing it wasn't him fucking into right now.

Wonho's eyes lift and lock onto the camera as it had done a few times before and for a moment it felt as if he were actually looking at you.

Through you.

Straight to your soul.

"You're about to cum aren't you?" He asks and you hiccup amidst your moan in reaction.

You lift your head from your pillow and blink away the blurriness to inspect your screen.

"Yeah...Im talking to you. I've got my eye on you...I've had it on you this whole time.." he rasps, now stroking his dick as if her priming a weapon ready to fire at any moment. 

His mouth goes slack for a second and his eyes roll back a little, but he resists the urge to look away from the camera.

From you...

"Oh fuck..I wish I was there. I bet you feel so good..fuck I bet you look so sexy right now. Are you touching yourself for me? Hmm?" He continues, this octave lifting to a gentle coaxing tone that has no will to resist responding to.

"Yes." You whimper, rubbing and swirling over your bud with the sole intention of getting yourself off.

"Good....keep going. And don't you fucking stop until you cum, you understand me?" He commands with a lifted brow.

"Yes..yes. Oh god..." you cry out, tearing your eyes away from the screen to shut them.

"Yes, baby! Like that...just like that...Im about to..." Wonho grunts and you open your eyes just in time to watch the thick spout of pearl shoot from his tip. Some of it hits his chest, drizzling over his sternum as he kept milking his dick for more. It was like it would never stop.

Your mouth hung open in a silent cry as you give in to the impending explosion as it sizzled down your spine.

Your breath hitches and your fingers pause over your clit at the memory of his intense gaze and throaty moan of release, and it's enough to send you hurdling over the edge and into a heart-stuttering orgasm.

Your climax hits you like shockwaves, making your muscles tense and relax as it passed over your body.

Hooded and lust-drunk, Wonho exhales finally and slows his strokes to rid himself of any remaining drops of cum he had left before sagging against the coach.

"Fuck...that was good...shit..." he pants, talking more to the ceiling than to his audience.

You lay limp in your bed, staring dazedly at your laptop with your now exhausted hand resting over your pussy.

That was good. Better than you'd expected for sure. You felt that same liberating tingly sensation all over that you always felt after an intense orgasm.

But this felt different.

Even though this was what he did for a living and thousands of people watched him exactly as you had...

And even though you knew there was no way in hell that this man could see you when he looked into his camera...

In your own little bubble of horny delusion, he was looking at you.

And that is perhaps what makes him so popular. The way he connects with his audience. The way he just doesn't set up a camera and act as if no one is watching him. He engages and puts on a show well worth the $10.99 a month.

Knowing and feeling that made this monthly subscription feel less like an expense and more like an investment.

Wonho's hand still rested around his dick, which was still stiff in his grasp but not as erect as it was seconds ago.

He sighs and leans up from the back of the couch, the sound of his sweaty back pealing from the leather surface making him cringe.

"Alright guys...that was fun but looks like Im gonna have to take another shower.." he huffs humorously.

You watched him in silence as he reached off-camera for a small washcloth he must have prepared beforehand.

Wonho cleans himself casually, wiping his cum from his chest and abs as if he spilled food on his shirt or something, and it makes you smile weakly.

He then wipes his hands thoroughly before tossing the washcloth aside. The cushions squeak beneath his bare ass cheeks as he scooted forward, lifting briefly to detach the device mounted by the tripod.

Now carried in the hand he just used to jerk himself off, Wonho held his audience and lifted them so that he was looking up at the camera in selfie mode.

"I hope you enjoyed our time together. I know it was quick but I didn't want to interrupt your day for too long. I have a lot of cool content planned for the month so stay tuned. Subscribe to get notifications and become a platinum member for exclusive videos. Until next time. Come back and see me. Bye..."  he winks and gives the camera a quick wave before the screen goes black again.

And just like that, the stream was over.

I miss him. I miss his random IG posts of his bawdy. I miss his smile. I miss his laugh. I miss his dorky shimmy when he’s shy or embarrassed or happy over his food. I miss his daily vlives (dammit Vlive why’d you have to go!!? *waves fist)

*sigh* anywho..🌚 I think im gonna do more onlyfans wonho stuff

[eddiemadmunson]

I am here for you

This is a little Aemond drabble I wrote for my dear friend @hamatoanne​​ because she is sick these days 😔 Get better soon bestie, and I hope you will like it 💕

Paring: Modern Aemond x reader Word account: 1500 Warning: none, it’s a fluff A/N: English is not my 1st language

“Omg, who is it?” you thought to yourself as you slowly walked to the front door. Someone was frantically ringing your doorbell. “I am coming,” you tried to yell, but you barely whispered because your throat hurt like hell. “I love to hear this sentence from your lips, kitten,” Aemond chuckled behind the front door and you blushed. Your boyfriend always made comments like this, loving the way how your cheeks turned pink afterwards. “Please take your finger from the door bell, my head hurts,” you said and he immediately stopped. “I am sorry baby, I tried to call you for 2 hours but you didn’t pick up your phone and I got worried. I called your mum and she told me that you are sick. Are you OK, kitten?”  “I feel like shit, Aemond,” you whined. “Open the door, Y/N,” he demanded. “No, you will be sick too, and I don’t want it. Trust me, my love. I feel horrible. I don’t want to pass this misery on you.” “My immune system is amazing, kitten. Don’t worry, I am a big guy, I can handle being sick, but as I said, I am never sick, just let me in, I hate the idea of you sitting alone in your house and feeling miserable”. You sighed and opened the door for him. He was right, you missed him, and you felt so sad and tired. You wanted his warm embrace. “Oh, my poor little bunny, come here,” he wrapped his big strong arms around your figure. You snuggled against him, enjoying his warmth.  “I look like shit,” you sniffed, suddenly realizing how you look. Your eyes were teary and slightly red, your nose red and sore from all the sneezing and blowing - you could easily make it as Santa’s reindeer Rudolph. Aemond gently kissed your lips and you were very aware that your lips are really chapped. But Aemond wasn’t complaining, he was looking at you like you are the most beautiful woman in Universe. “Don’t look at me, I look terrible,” you buried your head into his chest and he slowly lifted your chin and made you look into his blue eye. “You look beautiful as always, my love. You just don’t feel well. But in my eyes, you are the most beautiful woman in this world. So stop talking like this. Let’s take you back to your bed, my love, you need to rest,” he lifted you into his arms and walked inside your bedroom, gently placing you on your bed. “Do you want to watch movie or something on Netflix, kitten?” he asked as he lied next to you, cuddling you closer to his broad chest. “No, my head hurts and my eyes are sore, please tell me some stories from your work,” you pleaded. Aemond worked as a vet for exotic animals and his stories were always interesting. He told you a story about that one time he was almost eaten by a crocodile. He was laughing like it was nothing, but you were terrified that he could easily lost one of his limbs or die. “OK, baby girl, I will tell you a story about cute little lion cub I inspected this morning,” he smiled and kissed the top of your head. “But first I should make a strong tea with citruses, ginger and honey for you. I saw a perfect recipe on TikTok,” he said and froze. “What did you say? Did you say TikTok?” you laughed. Aemond was always mocking you for using this app, saying that it’s ridiculous and pointless. “No, I said on Youtube,” he tried to save the situation. “Liar,” you burst out laughing. “OK, fine. Aegon created an account under my name and forced me to watch few videos. I have to admit that I became addicted,” he finally admitted and you started giggling. Unfortunately your giggles soon turned into a fit of coughing. “I see that you really need that tea, my love,” Aemond watched you with worry. “I don’t have any ingredients here, Aemond,” you said but he replied that he will take care of it. You were cuddling and talking for a while and you felt much better when you had him next to you. Aemond always made your day better with his presence. “I will stay with you until you get better,” he announced and you looked at him in panic. “But what about your clinic and your patients,” you protested but he placed his finger on your lips to hush you. “Don’t worry, I already called Lucerys, he will take care of everything, he is capable to run the clinic for few days alone,” he assured you and you raised your eyebrow. He was usually very skeptic about his nephew's abilities. “Stop worrying about my job, love. You are sick and I will be here for you,” he kissed you slowly and shortly, knowing that you have problems with breathing now. “I love you Aemond, so much,” you snuggled closer to him. “Awww, you two are so sweet that it makes my teeth hurt,” you heard from the doorstep and you screamed. “What the fuck, Aegon. What are you doing here? How did you get inside?” you gasped, your heart pounding in your chest. “Relax, Y/N. Aemond texted me, that you need some vitamins,” he winked at you. “And you gave me your spare key last summer when you asked me to water your plants when you had been on vacation with Aemond,” he explained. “You still have it?” you asked him in disbelief. “Of course, we are almost family,” he enjoyed your outraged expression. “Leave the supplies and the key on the table and leave, brother!” Aemond warned him and Aegon raised his hands defensively. “Don’t worry, I am leaving. I won’t stay here in this lair off sickness. There will be so many Christmas parties filed with alcohol and willing pussies, I can’t be sick,” he chuckled and left you two alone. “He is unbelievable,” you scoffed and started coughing again. “Yes, he is and I am going to make that tea for you, kitten,” Aemond softly kissed the top of your head and left for the kitchen. You fell asleep for a while and when you opened your eyes he was there, his arms wrapped around your much smaller frame.  “How do you feel, my love?” he asked you and gently brushed a lock of your hair of your face. “I feel good when you are with me,” you mumbled, your voice changed with the sickness. “Liar,” he brushed his fingers across your face. “Here, try this tea, that girl on the video swore, that you will feel better after drinking it,” he handed you the cup and watched your reaction closely. You took a small sip and it surprisingly tasted really good. “It’s delicious, Aemond. Thank you, babe,” you slowly drank the rest of the tea and felt the warmth and sweetness running inside your body. When you finished it you placed your head on Aemond’s chest, your eyes slowly closing again. “I feel so tired, I am sorry to be such a boring company tonight,” you apologized and he scoffed. “Don’t be silly,  I love spending time in your company. You don’t have to talk or entertain me. Your presence alone is a blessing,” he assured you and you felt the happy tears in your eyes. Aemond kept you close to him, his hand was making soothing circles on your back and you slowly fell asleep. 

************************************************************************************** Aemond took care of you for 3 days, making you hot tea, feeding you chicken noodle soup his mother Alicent sent to you, using Aegon again as a messenger. You two were watching movies together, Aemond read you stories from his favorite books, and he told you so many funny stories about his work and his family, that your tummy hurt from all the laughing. You slowly got better and on Saturday morning you felt almost all right. Aemond made love to you, asking you thousand times, if you are alright or if you are not too tired. When you assured him that you are more than OK, your love making turned more passionate but he refused to fuck you hard like you both liked it, because you were still recovering. The patience of this man will be the death of you one day. Aemond was right, he didn’t get sick even after spending the whole time next to you. But Alicent called him on Sunday morning, telling him than Aegon is lying in his bed sick, acting like a moodiest brat on Earth. You decided to avoid Aegon until Christmas dinner with Aemond’s family, because you could imagine how pissed off he must be for getting sick. 

[maylorscardigan]

I have loved your take on things until now. how can you openly justify Matty with GG? It’s ok because he was curious? He’s getting off to these women being brutalized and tortured. Do you support him because YOU like doing the same thing? Do you watch it too? Because you must if you think it’s okay. It’s disgusting that you could be okay with it.

I’ve walked away from this anon a few times while writing it because I was ready to blow sky high.

Did you actually read my post? Had you actually gone through it you would have seen where I openly said I was a victim of sex trafficking. So how dare you come here and accuse me of getting off to it or enjoying it. I detest that industry with a passion you could never even begin to understand. It robbed me of my childhood and youth. So do NOT get me started on that.

No. I never said that I supported Matty’s enjoyment of it. I said that he is ONE man. ONE. Do you really think he’s the only responsible for the oh I don’t know… 🌽 hub being more popular than say Netflix in daily/monthly views? Do you think he is the only man responsible for dozens and yes I said DOZENS of videos being listed as “brutal” or “ruthless” or “hardcore” videos having multi-million views on hub? Or even worse… videos with things like “forced” or “r*pe” in the title having millions of views on other sites - sites that are even more popular than hub?

Reality check. He’s not. And if you think GG is as bad as you see on screen - you’re ignorant as hell. I can pull up in a matter of minutes, dozens of videos that make GG look innocent. And that’s BEFORE you even consider how many seemingly “tame” videos let alone more violent ones are actually sexual assaults where the girls are being f*cred or beaten on set. Or the reality that one take for half a scene can mean hours and hours and hours of painful filming and refilming like any Hollywood movie? Where women get threatened to go without pay or get beaten anyway and forced to keep going despite being raw, barely able to move with pain and without eating or fluids.

So don’t come in to my anons and act all high and mighty with me. Don’t even try it.

I am saying that going after one man for the choices he made is not the answer. I can empathize with fans feeling disgusted by it and peoples feelings being hurt and that is completely okay. But again - Matty is ONE person. Millions of people watch these same videos. Most of us have fathers, brothers, husbands, boyfriends, friends etc who do this very type of thing and people would rather bury their head in the sand then to do anything about it.

Did you know that trauma from porn addiction is so common now that there is a special kind of PTSD-like diagnosis for it? Look online on Facebook for instance. There are so many support groups for partners or porn addicts and the stories would crush you. The problem isn’t going to be fixed by hating one man. Take that anger and that rage and go for the source. Fight back.

But the reality is - out of every 100 people bashing Matty for this sort of thing… less then 1 of them will actually do anything to even research the realities of the industry let alone make any movement to change anything. And more then you’d expect will rip Matty apart online then go and watch something on one of these 🌽 sites that they think is perfectly normal when it’s not.

Witch hunt. Plain and simple.

[rookie-critic]

Elvis (2022, dir. Baz Luhrmann) - review by Rookie-Critic

Ok, so the good thing about Elvis is that the best part about it is Elvis. Austin Butler turns in a damn fine performance playing one of the music world's most revered artists. There are some more problematic aspects of Elvis' life and career that were almost definitely skipped over, but Butler's acting was phenomenal and deserves praise. Olivia DeJonge's performance as Priscilla Presley, for what little she's given to do, was good, as well. The big set piece scenes (the first Hayride concert, the charity concert, the '68 comeback TV special, etc.) were also excellent and the set decorators/builders, hair, and makeup departments should feel very proud of what they were able to accomplish in putting those scenes together.

Now, what didn't work was most of the rest of it. Tom Hanks is horribly miscast as Elvis' conniving manager, Colonel Tom Parker, and it is painfully obvious he was only cast and made the film's focal point because the studio didn't think they could sell this movie on Austin Butler and Elvis' name alone (contrary to what the poster above would have you believe). I love Tom Hanks deeply, but his accent is noticeably bad, the prosthetics he's in are distracting, and he just plain doesn't work here. Also, and I'm sure this is just personal preference because a lot of people seem to really love his movies and his style, but Baz Luhrmann's glitzy, frenetic, bombastic film making is so distracting it drags the whole production down. It works enough during those big showpiece scenes I mentioned, but outside of that it's just insanely distracting and took me completely out of the immersion of the movie. Austin Butler's fantastic acting is all but buried underneath 10 layers of "style," and what few scenes aren't just being vomited all over the screen and are left alone to breathe end up being some of the best scenes in the whole movie. The style should be living in harmony with the substance, and I just felt that Luhrmann cared a lot more about the look of the film than actually telling the story of Elvis Presley.

The final note I have is that this movie feels long. Now, 2 hours and 39 minutes is a decently long runtime, but Elvis had a very long and storied life that requires that kind of length. That being said, the runtime isn't the problem because, once again, large swaths of Elvis' life are glossed over in the name of providing more glam and showmanship of the screen. That 159 minutes could have been used to much greater effect. I wanted to like this. I really, really did, but Luhrmann, in my opinion, has a habit of getting in his own way, and this film is no exception.

Score: 5/10

Currently streaming on HBO Max.

For the record, I don't hate Baz Luhrmann's style outright. I think it can be used to wonderfully. If you want a Luhrmann project where I feel he was able to find a great balance, go watch his show The Get Down on Netflix.

[firstdivisiongirl]

Heyy, I’d like to request a match up from Tokyo revengers. Specifically a boy.

My pronouns are she/her.

I’m a Sagittarius. (Not sure if that helps in any way)

I would say I’m ambiverted. I enjoy my time alone and need time to recharge, but I also love to see people and be social. I usually attempt to initiate conversations with people I meet, but usually if they fall on the more quiet shy side I don’t really put in the effort unless I’m rlly interested in developing a friendship/relationship with them.

I talk about anything under the sun once I get the vibes that we get along and that we are comfortable w each other. I could consider myself a funny person (at least that’s what I hear from most ppl I hang around). I would say I have a dark sense of humour, but only indulge in it if I know that person is comfortable and finds that kinda stuff funny as well.

Likes: I rlly enjoy trying new foods, I’ll pretty much each anything, but I stay away from dairy stuff, rlly strong tasting vegetables, are meats with the gooey fat in it. Sometimes the oils in the fat is way too rich for me and the texture makes me gag.

I rlly rlly like going out to dinners w my girl friends

Love amusement parks and night markets

I enjoy going on trips to wherever, love the idea of travelling with friends or a significant others,

I’ve been trying to stop, but I love drinking with friends. On weekends I’m out with friends at the club or a random persons house or wherever the night takes us. Usually get home at 3-4am.

On weekdays I like to chill out, I’m either working, at the gym, or shopping online for clothes or grocery shopping. I try to do something productive everyday, even if it’s something small.

I rlly rlly enjoy the gym, I feel like it’s the perfect place for my favourite things. I love music and I can do that while lifting on the smith machine or going on the treadmill and just zoning out and day dreaming 😂also a perfect excuse to not text anyone back and to not have anyone bother me. I rlly like to check myself out in the mirror once I’m done. I feel like after u lift heavy weights on ur glutes ur ass gets rlly pumped😭😭

I love shopping online on FaceTime with my friend. Sometimes it can take hours, but whatever. Love to buy new make up and try new things for the weekend. Probably have a bad spending habit, but it’s ok the money will come back.

I enjoy reading. Usually stuff about psychology, philosophical stuff, business or any sort of fiction. It’s hard for me to start, but once I do I can’t stop.

I love deep talks with people, I feel like sometimes it’s hard to come across that. Usually ppl have small talk or surface level conversations, while it’s not a bad thing I don’t particularly enjoy it as much. But, I don’t necessarily hate it.

I love to just drive around aimlessly so I can listen to music. If I could I would just walk around outside for that, but I feel like I would look dumb walking on the same street back and forth. I like any kind of genre as long as it’s pleasant to my ears.

I like cooking as long as I have all the right ingredients.

I like watching those drama reality tv shows when I’m alone or with a girl friend. Like love is blind on Netflix. Idk if you’ve heard of that but it’s messy and entertaining. Not rlly a good thing, but sometimes I like to watch ppl argue😭. I love horror movies, but ONLY if I’m with a significant other or a group of friends. I like actions movies etc all of them. Not rlly a fan of the dark drama movies unless I’m feeling emotional and it fits the face of the day.

Dislikes: not rlly a fan of hypocritical ppl.

I don’t like ppl who get moody easily or if they’re having a bad day they make sure EVERYONE is having a bad day. If ur mad go b mad by yourself.

Don’t particularly enjoy it if smo doesn’t know or like to have fun. Everyone has their dislikes and I can respect that, but for me I’d like to b around smo who can enjoy things.

I don’t like it when ppl r unnecessarily loud. Pipe down. More specifically (shion and sanzu)

Don’t like guys who can’t have fun w their girl’s girly stuff. Like just have fun.

I don’t get along w ppl who can’t take a joke or can’t joke around. Ppl who r dead serious all the time.

I get annoyed w ppl who don’t rlly have common sense. If they ask a question w a very obvious answer. Smth like that. Or create a problem for themselves and I offer a very much different easy solution and they just don’t like it.

I don’t like ppl who r very goody two shoes. It’s not bad to have a good head on ur shoulders, but through my teen years I’ve always been surrounded by a lot of trouble makers. The girls I would b with are much like me, yk normal but quite accustomed to messed up things. A lot of the guy friends that I have/had have been to jail or been involved w not so morally good things. It isn’t a good thing to say or what not, but for a good portion of my teen hood and a little now I’ve been surrounded by a lot of immoral stuff that I didn’t realize it was because it was so normalized. ( this is not me bragging because I rlly don’t think it is smth to brag about). But, I’ve realized that because of all this I’ve noticed I find it very hard to truly get along with ppl who have grown up in a more clean environment. I’ve always felt I had to bite my tongue or not truly b able to say the things I wanna say. At my work I’ve let things slip and I can tell my coworkers r sometimes a little taken back. I myself don’t indulge in those stuff, but when we r talking stories n stuff I don’t realize that the stuff I am talking about r not normal. I always feel like I can’t rlly open up about personal stuff and etc because that other stuff that I have seen or been associated with is going to b a part of it. It’s like telling a story to ur mom and stopping halfway cuz u realize ur about to snitch on yourself😂

I always feel happy when I’m able to find smo who can relate or have similar experiences and I can rlly unveil myself. It feels very freeing and comforting.

I dislike hot n cold ppl.

My type:

I am rlly fond of guys who r cold on the outside, but are the sweetest to their significant other or ppl they love. Makes u feel extra special😂and it’s also cute

I like guys who joke around and can take a mean joke.

I like playful guys

I like guys who will worship the ground u walk on

I like guys who r happy to spend money on u

Very turned on by a guy that would protect u and will fight for u.

Unfortunately, I do like those bad boy types😭BUT not to me. That’s a no no.

And add on is if he has status. Not a must have but it would be nice. Like yes baby pop off 😭🫶🏼

I love men who lead the way for u. Initiates plans, wants to do things w u. Like to go out w u. Brings u home. Basically I don’t have to use my brain around him.

Love a man who wants u to meet his buddies. Brings u to his house etc

I want a man who will go to the gym w me. Let’s build our booties together.

This sounds messed up, but I’d like a guy who has been through smth😭I only say that because a lot of the time ppl who have been through smth traumatic become perceptive to other ppls emotions what not and it would b easy to bond and relate to things. Basically I want a guy who can see through me.

I like tattoos. Not a must, but it’s nice.

Personality:

I’ve been described as a bitch when I first meet ppl because I have a rbf, unfortunately. But, when they get to know me they say I’m quite kind. Sometimes I am taken back because I do feel over the years I’ve gotten a little cold and I do believe that ppl do feel it sometimes. I’ve very quick to cut ppl off despite knowing them for many years. In the past, I would definitely believe in second chances, but if u did what u did then that’s it. Although, from ppl that I got to know very closely they say that I’m very sweet many many times. I remember one of my coworkers was kinda just staring at me and she was like “ur actually a very sweet girl inside”. I was rlly taken back but it was nice. Same w my mom and best friend. Literally that word “sweet” has been used over and over I’m not sure why. Maybe I rlly do come off as a cold person and I don’t realize it😭

I would say I’m very polite and good at reading ppl.

Im pretty straight forward. I make jokes out of any situation even if it’s bad. But, if ik it’s serious I’ll give heart felt advice and words. I would say I’ve reserved my sympathy and love for ppl that I choose. It kind of goes against about me saying that I’m a sweet person, but that’s what most other ppl were saying so we’ll go w that.

While I do keep my walls up for ppl on the outside, when it comes to ppl I choose to be in my life I would do anything for them.

I have been called a “player” by most of my friends, but idk I’ve never seen it that way. If I know a guy isn’t good news I will mess around w him, as he’s probably doing the same. Although, if I know a guy genuinely has good intentions for me I’ll open my heart up to him and treat him w the same respect and so on. A lot of ppl misunderstand my character a lot and sometimes it does bother me, but it’s whatever.

I can tease ppl quite a bit, and sometimes it annoys them, but I find it quite amusing. I will make sure to apologize after though 😂

Sometimes ppl think I’m mean because I can be a liiiittle too sarcastic and may come off as me being dead serious, but I’m not.

I make out of pocket jokes all the time and say things that ppl want to say, but don’t. And I’ve grown comfortable w doing that because they do laugh since ur saying what everyone is thinking. A little confusing, but yk😭

I would say I’m quite a confident person with new ppl. When it comes to guys I don’t feel shy even if they’re rllyyyy cute. Although, if I genuinely like a guy I do get very flustered and nervous. With guys I don’t have any intentions with, I feel like I usually lead the way, but w a guy im talking to I feel like a little girl😂

I find a lot of things fun and always make smth out of nothing.

I’m pretty in control with my emotions and can be very analytical w my thoughts. But, when it comes to ppl I genuinely care about I’ve noticed all of that goes out the window.

I can feel pretty jealous when it comes to a significant other, but then my thoughts contradict that. For example I’ll FEEL jealous but I’ll be thinking “lol why would he ever have his eyes on another girl when he has me, personality, looks and everything”. Basically saying that it’s impossible for him to do anything grimy.

I am very understanding and smart with other ppls emotions and decisions. (If that makes any sense)

When I get angry I don’t allow myself to take my anger out on whoever. I always calm myself down and then talk to them calmly and rationally.

Sometimesss I can be a little selfish without realizing it. But, I make up for it when it’s pointed out or when I realize it. It’s been a work in progress.

Looks: I got black long hair. Might cut it a bit shorter for change who knows.

I have lash extensions, but not those heavy butterfly lashes.

I get my nails done. Pedicure manicure.

I have a cursive script tattoo on my collarbone. Wanted to get smth a little classy looking. I have a nose stud. Used to have a ring but switched it.

I also have Japanese kanji between my b00bs. It’s hidden so only for a special smo to see. It sounds funky, but I promise it looks good😂

I wear jewelry, not tooooo much though. A good amount.

I have an average amount of b00b. My bum is quite there. Time at the gym has rlly been fruitful😗

Style:

During chill days, I would say my style is more laid back, but put together. I usually wear a small purse w whatever I have. Very feminine looking especially during the summer and spring. I like wearing long or short skirts. The long ones I like tight so I can show my curves. Summer and spring varies between clothes like that. Winter time I would say smth more comfy. Usually converse w those tna flare pants. And a nice cute top. Usually smth loose. Maybe a knitted top.

On weekends I go all out. When I go to the club I wear heels and smth tight😭 usually curl my hair or straighten it. Nice winged eyeliner etc

If we’re drinking and we don’t go to the club I’ll wear smth nice but with shoes.

If me n my friends r going to those expensive restaurants, I’ll wear smth classy looking. Have my hair in a blow out if I can accomplish that. It’s very hard, so usually I’ll just curl it. I feel like curling hair softens ur features and makes u look more approachable.

Anyways that was very long. I didn’t mean to make it long, but I got carried away😭I hope u can respond 😋<3 (plz don’t give me draken, kaku or mikey. But, if u do it is what it is🫡OR HANMA N KISASKI)

Hi. As I’ve said before, I take all characters into consideration when I do a matchup. Lucky for you, you didn’t get any of those characters you didn’t want. I did give you a more controversial character though. So, I hope you like it.

You Got…

Taiju Shiba!!

First off, he has tattoos. And you cannot tell me you get abs like that from not working out!

SPOILER ALERT 🚨: He ends up owning a restaurant so he would only take you to the finest!

I think you would be able to calm him down if he gets really angry since you understand being angry.

I picture rooftop club dates.

I will argue anyone who disagrees with me on this. I think he is secretly a softy. He just had to grow up too fast. He cared enough to leave them because he knew he was always going to be a monster.

Lastly, he’s been through a lot.

This man is literally your ideal type!

[melancholiaenthroned]

ill be like yeahhh im not rlly into sge anymore its just a book i read in like elementary school u know <3 as if ive moved on and then someone will be like hey remember sge and i will go I Have A Lot To Say About The School For Good And Evil

[themultifandomgal]

Sweet Pea- The New Girl pt3

When I wake up I feel like my arms are restricted

"Ahhh your awake. Perfect. As you can see your in the middle of our garden. My guess is the Serpents will be here in the next hour or so” I can feel that I’ve been gaged so I can’t speak. The guy with curly hair walks away and I’m left alone wondering where Veronica is. I sit on this chair for what feels like hours. I’m hoping that the sheriff comes soon.

I hear a twig and start to freak out until I hear Jugheads voice

"Hey YN. You gotta be quiet ok" Jug cuts the rope, but as he does the lights turn on and out walks a woman and the guy who spoke to me earlier

"Hiya Jug. Welcome back to the Southside"

"I thought this bitch might get you to show up. We need to talk"

"No we don't Penny I'm here for YN"

"You sure about that?" Suddenly I'm pulled into Malachais grip, he's holding a bat with nails on to my chest "If you didn't want trouble why have you been sending spies all summer trying to get in our business"

"Just let YN go and we will leave"

"I'll make you a deal. Back off and you can have YN . Unless you want a reply of Riot Night and this time YN will be on the right side" I really have no idea what’s going on right now. I’m absolutely petrified

"Your Jacket. The Southside isn't yours anymore. Take it off or we could always take it off your dead limp body" Penny shrugs

"Fine you can have the jacket just let YN go and stay out of the Northside"

"Oh you don't get to make demands" Malachai says putting more pressure on my chest

"Ahh" I scream being able to feel the nails on the bat dig into my skin

"It's ok baby I'll fix it later" Malachai starts to kiss my neck

"Let her go hobgoblin now" Cheryl says holding a bow and arrow

"You can't tell me what to do" then the nails are ripped out of me as an arrow shoots into his shoulder. I run over to Jughead

"Fine. You want it the hard way. Kill them all"

"Cheryl aim your next arrow between Penny's eyes" Penny puts her hand up to stop the Ghoulies "take one step closer she'll release that arrow. And Cheryl doesn't miss"

"Congratulations you just made the Northside fair game" Jughead takes my hand and leads me towards the others

“Hey are you ok?” Fangs asks with concern in his face

“Of course shes not Fangs. She’s bleeding”

“I’m..” I touch my chest and see blood on my hands “oh..”

“Instead of just starring at her why don’t we get her to the hospital? who knows what was on that bat” Toni takes my none bloody hand and guides me to the truck.

6 months later

I wake up sweating and crying, I had another dream about that night

“Hey, hey, your ok” I’m pulled into Sweet Pea’s arms “the Serpents won’t let anything happen to you. I won’t let anything happen to you” Sweet Pea strokes my hair trying to calm me down “I promise” I sigh

“Thank you Sweets”

“Why don’t we watch something, take your mind of things”

“Yeah, I’d like that” I look up at Sweet Pea smiling

“What shall we watch? your choice”

“Legally Blonde?” I smirk. Sweet Pea groans throwing his head back “orrr we could watch The Princess Diaries”

“Legally Blonde it is” Pea kisses my lips then gets out my laptop and places it on the bed and puts up Netflix

“Thank you Pea, for that night”

“It was all Jughead” I shake my head at him

“Toni told me that it was you who pushed for the Serpents to come and get me. Toni said Jug was going to get his dad to bring me home, but you wanted to make sure I was ok. Thank you Pea”

“I’ll always be on your side and help you. And Malachi won’t ever touch you again” Pea kisses my head. I lean my head on Pea’s shoulder and we begin to watch the movie.

[rommahh]

Love On Tour…Actually

{Im sorry for how late this was. I went to the show Friday and honestly, it was the best day of my life. I had a little PCD which made me super unmotivated but I’m back. I love you all, R}

You woke up a little grumpy, you won’t lie. You didn’t like waking up alone especially on a show day. It made you uncomfortable to be left to your own devices without any structure or schedule. You understood that Harry was a busy man but it would’ve been nice to receive some text so you could plan your day accordingly.

Sitting on the couch in the lounge of your hotel room, you chowed down on leftover pasta while watching Netflix on your iPad. You had yet to receive a text from Harry even though you had texted him hours ago when you woke up. It was hard to tell if he was ignoring you out of anger or if he was simply just lost in track. Either way you felt dejected.

On the other hand, Harry hadn’t even noticed that he iced you. He was busy running around Nashville trying to get things ready for tonight’s show. He bought you a new dress and shoes, and got the ring fitted. It was hard to figure out your ring size but he end up measuring your finger when you were passed out asleep in bed last night. When you slept, you slept and he knew that would be the perfect time to measure your finger.

Harry was so busy that morning, that by the end of his errands he realized he didn’t even have time to go back to the hotel before rehearsals. He was sporting a small cough and his vocal chords felt overworked but that’s all apart of tour.

Pulling his phone out of his back pocket as he walked into the arena, he dialed your number quickly. He had people trying to talk to him but he paid them no mind.

“Oh? Would you look who’s here?” Harry’s head shot up to the sound of your voice. There you sat on his dressing room couch, arms crossed over one another as you glared at him. Your gaze burned through him and he could just tell he was in trouble.

“Hello lovie.” Harry rasped.

“Harry you sound like shit but here you are up and about running around. You should’ve slept in this morning.” Scolding as you stand up to walk in front of him. Harry could feel the anger radiate off of you but you hid it well. He melted into your hands that cupped his warm cheeks.

“I had a lot of errands to run and I didn’t want to wake you. Also it’s just a sore throat from singing and traveling- comes with being on tour.” He mumbles dropping his head into your neck. You caress the hairs on the back on his neck and massage the tense muscles.

“You’ve got to think about yourself more, Harry. You have a show to put on but you can’t put on your best show if you’re not at your best. I am not happy with you at all.” Even though your words were scolding him, you held him your arms in the most soothing way. That’s what Harry loved about you, you cared for him like no one else could (aside from his mom). You could tell him off with your harshest words but he’d always feel your love from miles away.

“You’re right love, sorry for not keeping in touch today.” You hum in acknowledgement. You both pulled away from each other when his driver walked in with Harry’s abundance of bags. “Thank you, sir.”

“What all did you buy?” You ask walking towards the bags. Harry’s arm shot out in front of you making you stop. You looked up at him in shock. “Fine be secretive.”

You huffed before making your way back to the couch. Harry rolled his eyes at you, making way to his shopping bags. Plucking the bag from Nordstrom he plopped it down on the table in front of you.

“I just didn’t want you snooping at some other stuff. I bought you this, for tonight.” He sat down beside you, thighs touching leaving no room between you two.

“Im not trying to be mean. Just a little peeved that you left this morning without telling me. You also have a cold and I wanna take care of you since you won’t do it.” A hand rubs his forehead luring his eyes shut.

“Sorry baby, I thank you for caring so much.” He whispers sleepily.

“Im always gonna care for my bubs.” Kissing him on the lips, your turn your attention to the bag. The small grey bag had light tissue paper covering the product within the bag. The tissue falls to the floor as you dig into the bag. A silky champagne dress, folded neatly to decrease wrinkles, sits in the bag. The dress was soft and you knew it was loose enough to give you the room to dance. Soft snores escaped the boy beside you- the exhaustion evident on his face.

You pull the dress out of the bag and walk over to where his outfit of the night hung. The dress was hung beside his to be steamed for later. Turning around, you smile at the sight of your curled up boyfriend. Your heart hurt knowing that in a few minutes he would have to go rehearse.

Harry sleepily went through rehearsals sitting in a chair the whole time. He knew his stage cues and performance, he only had one more thing to rehearse but it required for you to not be in the room. He gave one look to Jeff to signal him to get you out. Jeff made up some excuse saying that he needed help with some social media post for the show.

Before the show, there was a catered dinner from some local restaurant. Harry ate a light meal of fresh vegetables and a sweet iced tea which has grown on him having lived in the states for some years. You ate grilled chicken and fries enjoying the free food. The two of you ate alone in his dressing room- wanting a moment of piece before the crazy.

“How are you feeling?” You ask Harry. He shrugs, he was more nervous than anything but you wouldn’t understand why if he had told that to you. He felt floaty. Tonight would be a game changer, a step in a whole new direction. This is something he’s wanted to do for years now but it’s finally happening, and he’s scared.

"Im ok, a little tired but what else is new. I can't wait to sleep all night and cuddle with you." He grabs your hand from across the table. you squeeze it, frowning at his revelation.

"I don't like that you're so tired." You worry, his hand squeezes yours in reassurance.

“Im ok, it’s all apart if the job.” He looks down to your bare ring finger, thumb brushing over the empty spot. Your nails were done in your favorite way, some funky pattern you found from Pinterest all painted on short coffin nails.

“I love you Harry and I’m so proud of you. I know that these years put us both in a bad place mentally but I’m happy of where we are now.” Harry could almost tear up to your words. They settled into his mind, resonating. He was making the perfect decision and you solidified that ideal.

2014

Harry didn’t know how they did it. A show every night, a new state everyday, a new country every few months- he was burnt out. He was tired of shared tour buses and the lack of autonomy. Last nights LA show was amazing, the crowd was amazing, the energy was amazing- so why did he feel so horrid?

He walked around in The Grove, security guards walking in front and behind him. He wanted a peaceful day alone but here they were. Fans watched suspiciously trying to decipher if it was Harry or not. His hat and sunglasses were obviously not the disguise he thought they would be.

As the whispers got louder, his heart started to flurry more. Panic seeped into his veins as he looked for an escape. Bolting in the Barnes and Nobles- security guards close behind- Harry asked for the employees to close shop just for a moment. Harry only needed a moment to get a car near by to escape to. Feeling overwhelmed, Harry hid.

In between the historical fiction and romance aisle is where he sat. Head between his knees, trying to catch his breathe.

“Are you ok?” A voice asked from above him. His head whipped up in shock. Standing there was you, three books clutched between your arms. Adjusting your dress you dropped down to the floor in front of him.

“I-im fine, tired but fine.” He replied. He looked different than he did the night before, you thought. Last night, he was energetic and full of life and now, now you saw a boy whose exhaustion overpowered him.

“You here for any books?” You were just trying to change the subject, something you did with yourself when you had panic attacks.

“Oh no, I don’t-“ he stuttered shaking his head. You smiled at him before pulling a book from your stack. The fault In Our Stars, your new favorite.

“I love this book, one of my favorites. Heard a movie is coming out too so that’s fun.” You joke. Harry’s relaxed slightly, you nestled closer to him. Opening the book, you began reading, your gentle voice calming Harry.

At the start of chapter four, an interruption pulled you both away. Harry’s security guard told Harry that a car was waiting and the perimeter of the store was clear. Harry nodded telling the guard to give him five more minutes.

“I guess this is it.” You mumble closing your book. Harry nods but makes no move to leave. Something clicks in him as he looks at your face again.

“You were at the concert last night, meet and greet?” He muses.

“Yeah, One Direction is my favorite band. My friend bought our vip tickets for my birthday. Best night ever.” You say quietly, scared that he might think that you’re some obsessed fan.

“Oh, well I’m glad you enjoyed the show….so why didn’t you freak out today or- or expose where I was?”

“You’re a human being, just like me. You get nervous, frustrated, and sad just like me. You get panic attacks just like. Who am I to treat you differently?” Your words did so much for Harry. “Now don’t get me wrong, you’re my favorite in the band, but I don’t idolize you nor do I wish to be in your position cause I know it must be hard.”

“It is. Hard, I mean, really really hard. I love my job but I’m tired.” The silence you two shared burned a connection between you two. “This may be weird but could I have your number? I like talking to you and I wanna hear more of this book.”

Placing your hand made bookmark in the book, you closed in and gently placed it on Harry’s lap. “Have it. I have one at home and if you still want to talk about it- I’ll give you my number.”

Harry stills as the book sits in his lap. “I want to talk to you about the book.”

After exchanging numbers, Harry was urged by you to go. Walking side by side to the door, you were separated by his security.

“Harry, don’t let this keep hurting you. Find the joy and grasp on to it.”

You turned out to be his joy. Calls every night after shows and different books being read together, you both gravitated towards each other. Everyday was a new day to grow closer together. He invited you to more concerts, paying for every ticket because he just needed to be with you.

The show was going beautifully. Harry looked amazing in stage in all white and most fans were captivated by your outfit too. It worried you to see Harry so exhausted on stage but you knew he would stick it through like he always does. Proud was an understatement in your eyes. Harry made you more than proud.

You stood in the back of the watermelon pit at the end of the aisle where his stage stopped a few feet away. Jeff stood beside you like he normally did but he was acting suspicious. You two never stood on the side of Harry’s exit but this is where Jeff said you’d get the best view tonight.

Harry sang his final ‘we’ll be alright’ before doing his stage stroll and bows, but instead of finishing in the middle of the stage- he went down stage to the place he normally exits to at the end of the night. You watched in confusion, along with the crowd, as he walked down the steps to you. The crowd erupted in screams as the lights focused on where you were standing.

“What are you doing?” You asked with large eyes of shock. You felt your heart stop in your chest. The crowd getting louder by the moment. Harry walked closer to you, one hand digging into his pocket while his eyes focused on your face. You couldn’t place what was happening but you’re eyes welled with even more tears nonetheless. Jeff was to the side with a huge smile and his phone out to capture the moment.

“Y/N, my love, my light, the best thing that has happened to me,” he didn’t have his mic on so the crowd couldn’t hear him but you could hear him perfectly. As if you two were the only ones in the large arena, you could only see Harry. “From the moment I met you in the bookstore, I knew you were meant to be in my life. Somehow you took me from my darkest place and guided me to my lightest.

I know our lives have been hard but we’ve always found a way to be alright. I want that for the rest of my life. I want you to be by my side for the rest of my life, so will you please, my love, marry me?”

You gave him no time to answer as you yanked him up by his arm. You wept as you exclaimed loud yeses, yeses that could be heard by a few fans who screamed in excitement igniting the rest of the crowd to scream. Harry picked you up in his arms, throwing one arm out to wave at the crowd before bounding backstage.

“Oh my god Harry!” You exclaimed as he set you down. He only had a few minutes to talk so you kept it quick. You pulled his face down to your kissing his lips. This kiss pulled you both deeper into each other.

He pulled away making you whine. “I gotta go back but I promise you’ll get it all tonight. I can’t believe you said yes. I love you so much.”

Harry’s energy multiplied by 100 going back on stage. He even went as far as to explain what watermelon sugar was about. Remembering when the song was made, it made your legs clench together- a pulse overwhelming your lower regions.

Looking down at your hand, you could feel yourself tear up again at the ring he bought you. It fit perfectly in your hand, you remember him measuring your hand that night even though he thought you were asleep. The thought of your future made your heart swell. A future with new music, a wedding, a nice house, and babies made your heart swell. This was something you couldn’t wait for.

Harry found his joy in you but he never knew about the joy he was to your dark life.

[boykisserbuckley]

beneath the lonely lights - 1k buck wants a hug. he gets one. 

It’s a quiet night in Buck’s apartment, and the darkness presses in against the windows. He’s got one lamp on, casting a golden glow from behind the couch, and he’s just finished some movie he’d picked off of netflix that looked vaguely interesting. He’d only been half paying attention while he scrolled on his phone, but it worked for a while as background noise. Then the credits rolled, and the quiet pushed right back in.

Buck likes his apartment, really, but sometimes it feels a little too big. It’s spacious and gorgeous and he loves it in the light of day, when the world is awake and loud. He loves it when Eddie is here, or Maddie, and he has someone he can talk to. 

Now, though, the silence is suffocating.

It’s not like—well, it’s not like he can’t handle being on his own. He’s had some practice, after all. He can fill the space with noise, music or the tv or a phone call, if he needs. He can deal. It’s just that on nights like these, when the well of distractions runs dry, it hits him like a wave. 

Buck sits up. There’s no reason for him to be feeling like this, not tonight—he’d been with his team all day, and he knows they love him. He knows he’s not alone, and he’s okay when he’s with them and he can fill the void with chatter. It’s not just him against the world, anymore. 

But when he shuts the tv off and the light from the lamp behind him casts his reflection on the blank screen, sitting cross-legged in the middle of his couch, he can’t stop the hot press of tears that gather at his lashes. His apartment is too big and too dark and too empty, and he’s all alone, and it’s all too much. Buck’s own loneliness sits like a weight in his chest, heavy and aching. God, he just wants a hug right now.

He sniffles once, and the wave crests and breaks. He presses the heels of his palms into his eyes and takes a trembling breath but the tears slip past anyway, and suddenly he’s crying for no good goddamn reason on his stupid couch in his stupid apartment all by himself. Buck scrubs at his face with his sleeves, but all that does is get his hoodie wet. He can’t get himself to stop. He feels pathetic. He wants a fucking hug. 

The screen of his phone is blurred and warped by his tears so he swipes at them again, almost angrily, until he can see his texts. Maddie’s on shift, so he can’t ask her. Buck doesn’t think he could bring himself to admit this surge of whatever-the-hell he’s feeling to his sister, anyway. He’s too embarrassed. But Eddie, though—Eddie gives fantastic hugs, and Buck knows he’s home, because they’d gotten off a shift together only a few hours before. 

Buck has the question typed and sent before he can overthink it. mind if i come over?

Door’s always open, Eddie answers not even a minute later. And then, Everything ok?

It’s not. It should be. Nothing’s even wrong, really. It’s just not right. How does he even begin to explain that? 

Buck tries to take a breath deep enough to steady himself, only half succeeding. After a moment, he settles on; could just really use a hug.

Get over here then, Eddie texts back. 

And Buck doesn’t have to be told twice, with the promise of some company. He sticks his phone in his pocket and heaves himself to his feet. Another swipe of his sleeve across his face ensures that he doesn’t look like a complete mess, but as he locks his door and heads for the parking lot, he still hopes he doesn’t end up running into a neighbour. 

He gets enough of a handle on himself on the drive over that by the time he’s pulling into Eddie’s driveway, Buck just feels a little ridiculous. He’s still sniffling lightly, but his tears have dried. He feels shaky and scraped out and raw, still a little off-kilter and a lot embarrassed. But he’s here. 

The door is unlocked, just like Eddie had promised, and Buck lets himself in. He moves quietly so as not to wake Christopher, who he expects is already asleep by now. It’s late. He might feel bad about that, if this were anyone but Eddie. 

Eddie’s house, even in the quiet, doesn’t feel oppressive. It doesn’t feel cold, or lonely. It’s nothing like his apartment. It’s everything he needs right now. 

Buck rounds the corner and there’s Eddie, just turning away from the sink to face him as he steps into the kitchen. The dishes look half done, but Eddie ignores them in favour of grabbing the dishtowel he’d draped over his shoulder and drying off his hands. 

“Hey,” Buck says. He curls his fingers into the ends of his hoodie sleeves, and tries for a smile. 

Eddie takes in his appearance—and what a sight he must make, right now—and tosses the towel to the side. It lands on the counter, missing the edge of the sink by a hair. 

“Come ‘ere,” Eddie says, and he opens his arms like he’s inviting Buck in and it’s—it’s everything Buck needs right now, no matter how silly he felt a moment ago. 

He practically dives at Eddie, wrapping his arms under Eddie’s and curling as close as he can get, hiding his face in Eddie’s shoulder. Buck takes a deep, steady breath, and lets it out slow. 

Eddie wraps his arms around Buck’s shoulders and gives him a little squeeze. The strange, unexplained tension Buck had been carrying all night finally starts to ease. He melts into Eddie’s embrace, soaking in his best friend’s comfort. 

“Thank you,” he says, words muffled against Eddie’s shirt. 

“No need,” Eddie says. “You’ve got me, Buck. Any time.” 

“I know,” Buck agrees, because he does. Eddie just hums in response, and they fall quiet. It isn’t so heavy here, wrapped up in Eddie. Here, the quiet is easier to face. 

[bts-reveries]

expect the unexpected | 9

(images in between text + bonus at the very very end!)

“Okay, we’ll make it just in time for our plane as long as there isn’t any traf--” Jin stops and so does your car, following a long line of other cars along the highway. You sigh, rubbing your temples.

“You jinxed it,” you say. “This anniversary trip is going so well.” Sarcasm and annoyance laced your voice.

“Everything will workout in the end, once we get on the island, we’ll be okay,” he says, putting a hand on your lap. “It’s our anniversary, it’s our only time alone, it’s going to be fun and we’re going to enjoy it.” Jin lifts up his hand to squish your face. He mocks the sad, pouty face you’re making. “Don’t. Be. Sad.” He squishes your face with every word.

The flow of traffic started moving, finally, and you can tell that Jin’s a little stressed out. With everything that happened throughout the day pushed aside, there were new problems now. One, will you get to the airport in time? Two, if you don’t, will there be available flights in the next hour? Three, will your airbnb still be available?

Honestly, everything should be fine. There’s a perfectly good solution to each of those problems, each can be solved easily.

You can catch a later flight if you’re late, and at least if you do, you don’t need to rush. And if being late causes you to lose your airbnb, you should be able to find a new one. But it’s not likely since you two booked it for the next few days. 

Right? 

-

Okay, so the two of you made it just in time!

To miss your flight.

But no worries, you got on the next flight and you and Jin were able to relax for about an hour.

You laid your head on Jin’s shoulder as you two waited for your flight. 

His shoulders were relaxed, not as tense as it was earlier when you two were rushing to the airport and you were starting to feel like everything was going to go well. 

But something in your mind kept you from taking a quick nap on your husband’s shoulder.

“We didn’t forget anything did we?” You ask Jin as you two were walking to your seats on the plane. You felt like you were forgetting something, and it was bothering you.

A lot. 

“I don’t know, I don’t think so,” your husband answers, following you from behind. “And if we did, it’s kind of too late now.”

“I think I was supposed to buy something.” You sighed as you sat down in your seat. “I can’t remember, I think it was important.”

Jin sits down next to you, looking up as he was thinking of what you could have forgotten. 

“Snacks?”

“I feel like it’s something more important than that.”

“What could be more important than snacks?” Jin replied with an eye roll. You think you just saw Haneul in him just right now. 

Now you know where he got it from.

It was no surprise.

“Oh!” you say, remembering something. “The medicine cabinet!” Jin quirks up an eyebrow at you.

“You need.. to buy a medicine cabinet?” He asks you with a concerned expression. You give him the ‘are you kidding me’ face.

“No. It was something IN our medicine cabinet that I ran out of--”

“My allergy medicine!” Jin says, a little too loud, in panic. Your eyes widen and you slap a hand over his mouth. 

“Too loud,” you say as if you were talking to your little ones. 

“Was it that?” He says, muffled by your hand.

-

You and Jin finally made it to Jeju island. The two of you rented a car and made your way to your airbnb.

“What do you mean ‘No’.” Jin says. Shocked. Surprised? Maybe even annoyed. 

The two of you found a perfect place to stay and booked a few days, and nights of course, but with your schedule and plans changing with today’s events, the place was taken. 

“I’m sorry sir, but you were supposed to be here an hour ago and we waited and waited, and someone else came and paid extra just to take your--”

“But we made reservations!” Jin argued, letting out an annoyed laugh. “We paid everything--”

“And we will give you a refund sir.”

Jin turns to you and you just nod, placing a hand on his arm. “We’ll find a better place,” you reassure him. 

“Fine.” He says, leaning into your ear and whispering, “I’m leaving them with a bad review.”

-

After getting a refund, researching for a new place, finding a better airbnb, and booking it, oh and Jin giving a 1 out of 5 stars on their website, you and Jin finally were able to relax and enjoy your anniversary. 

I know.

Finally. 

“The sun’s setting soon,” you say sadly as you look out the window. “I can’t believe we wasted a whole day of our trip.” You rested your head on your hands. Jin comes by and sits next to you on the couch, looking out with you. Like a couple of kids wanting to go outside and play. 

Come to think about it, you’re sure you saw your kids doing the same thing the other day.

You were starting to miss them.

“We can stay an extra day if you want,” Jin says. “I’ll call in, I’ll let mom and dad know too--”

“It’s okay,” you say, shaking your head. “Let’s just make the most of our weekend.”

“Okay,” Jin nods. “Should we just order food and stay in? We had a pretty long day.”

“Sure,” you say. “After we eat, what else should we do tonight?”

Jin turns around and away from the window, looking at you with his whole body facing front and just his head towards you. 

“We can plan out our day tomorrow so we can make the most of our trip…” Can you tell you and Jin liked to plan? “And maybe we can watch a movie, I have a few saved on my list on Netflix.” You smile up at him.

“A long night in bed sounds great after today’s ‘festivities’.”

“If that’s what you want,” Jin says with a small laugh, leaning in to give you a kiss. “I’m up for whatever you want to do.”

“I think it’s the only way we should be spending our first night away from the kids.”

♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

expect the unexpected

♡ part nine: jin stan account ♡ 

pairings: ceo, dad!jin x interior designer, mom!reader

a/n: stressful day calls for some de-stressing tonight

i wonder what movie they’ll watch

taglist: @silentlyimpractical @jillianmarie @waddlebby @cecedrake2217 @ddofa @samros95 @sope-and-shine @joonjoonsmiles @codeinebelle @aianloveseven @Chamchamcham @princessjazzyjazz @notvantaes @casspirit0705 @ramyagovindraj @brinnalaine @ephyra1230 @betysotelo18 @thoughtfultaledreamer @salty-for-suga @cosmicdaylight @dreamcatcherjiah @kookoo-kachoo @justinetingball  @josierosie @jayhope88 @butterflylion @hobiismyhopeu @momma-said-that-it-was-oke @shinyplaidbagellamp @catspancake  @somewhereofftheglobe @strawberryforever25 @rjsmochii @prdshobi @beeeb05 @eatjeanjin @taekookcaneatme @Cheeely14 @kookietsukkie @anpanman-sonyeondan @glitteringcoffeefreak @chocobetterknot @alpaca1612 @ohmy-fandoms @liljooniecutie @Jikachoo @preciouschimine @fan-ati--c @Joondala @httpmuffin @dammit-jjk @jikooksgirl19

TAGLIST IS CLOSED!

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♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡ ♡

BONUS

clingy haneul needed some good night kisses

[stephspurs]

A Family Affair | Euro 2020 Football Fanfiction

Hi besties - here is part 6! We are officially halfway through this fic! Part 6 sees friendships blossom, situationships struggle, and cheeky intercontinental facetime chats! I hope you all are enjoying it as much as i am! I love hearing from you after you've read it! Love always, Steph xx

Part 6 | parte sesta

warnings; a couple of tugs on the heartstrings (in both the best and worst ways)

word count; 2301

writing tools; third person until dashed line, first person thereafter.

next update; Friday 06/08 5pm AEST. Updates are three times/week (Monday, Wednesday & Friday)!

Tags (as requested by users); @footballffbarbiex @obsesseds-world @abysshaven

link to fic masterlist here

Amelia had been back in Turin for a week or so, settling back into her city apartment had been more difficult than she anticipated as she was now alone for the first time in more than 2.5 months. It wasn’t very often, but sometimes she did miss the companionship of having a boyfriend. She missed someone to have breakfast with, to watch movies under the covers, to bring to official events. She still did all of these things, with a date, that was a friend, that sometimes maybe crept beyond the friendship zone and into the we shouldn’t be doing this but it feels so good zone.

Fede was someone that hung around Amelia like a fly to sugar. She enjoyed the attention most of the time. She appreciated his friendship, wisdom, talent and intellect. He could hold a conversation, talk to her about the arts, sell her the dream. She even didn’t mind it when they did cross that line a few times. Long afternoons and even longer nights spent wrapped up together in his bed sheets, her bathtub, his kitchen, her lounge room...you get the point. It was almost as though the two were in a committed relationship - committed being the operable word.

Fede wanted Amelia all to himself, and she was just that - available to him and for him whenever he wished, which was often. That’s what confused Amelia most, he didn’t want to label their situationship. He was happy to be ‘friends’ outside the four walls of their respective homes, but lovers when the curtains were drawn. She would maybe understand if he was elusive, always going out and on his phone but he wasn’t. He spent all of his time with her, there wouldn't have been enough hours left in the day if he separated those he spent with her from those he spent alone.

The Juventus players noticed this behaviour early on, seeing a noticeable difference in the way their number 33 paid attention to their tactical sessions. How he was turning up to the training centre early, with an extra piccolo for the english member of their coaching staff. Federico claimed he was helping Amelia brush up on her Italian, but having an Italian-born mother who insisted on sharing her culture with her kids, meant she was pretty much fluent in the language before arriving in Turin. His teammates weren’t stupid and neither was she.

This was the one area of her life where Amelia felt comfortable to go with the flow, she didn’t need to prepare or overthink anything to do with the charming Italian boy from Firenze. She let him take it at his own pace, she was in no need to rush. She let him take her home to meet his Nonna, she spent quality alone time with his dogs when he’s running late from training, and that’s a rare occasion being that it’s normally her there after him and he hangs back to drive them both home.

Everything was progressing at his pace, and the moment Amelia just asks for some clarification on the situation, he would get visibly stressed. He wanted to have his cake and eat it too. And for a long time he could, he had Amelia's attention and affection at Juve, he even had it during their european campaign. At the end of the tournament, when they all broke up for their summer breaks, Fede conveniently waited until their final round in the shower, if you know what i mean, before pulling her into bed and having a heart to heart with her.

Amelia thought that she was finally getting the clarification that she was after, which in a way she did. Fede spoke whimsical words about how she makes him feel wanted and understood, and in turn he told her about the affects he knew he had on her. It was a conversation that would turn Shakespeare to a pile of rose petals. In the end, he told her that he wanted to continue what they had just how they had been doing it. And so, that's exactly how they left it. No labels. Friends outside of the four walls of their apartments. That was all Amelia needed to be able to enjoy her family holiday in Mykonos, guilt free, not missing the man that became the equivalent of her shadow.

The constant company she had in Mykonos compared to what she was experiencing in Turin made her more eager to return to work than she had previously. Of course, there are group chats and facetimes and phone calls throughout the days that kept her occupied, but she was missing the boys and her brother. Her friendship with Kyle was back to its old ways, memes being shared across the european continent, long phone calls to talk about their problems. Kyle knew all about the Fede x Amelia situation, Amelia having given him the sparknotes version over a wine filled zoom session one evening that same week. Their pre-seasons hadn’t gone back yet so they were able to indulge in a bit of vino, guilt free.

She was surprised about the constant contact, or lack thereof, that some of the boys had maintained with her. Ben Chilwell hadn’t once messaged or instagrammed the girl, despite being active in their group chats and liking her holiday pictures on instagram. He even made the rookie error of liking a picture so far down on her instagram, there was no way to explain his need for being there. She messaged him a couple times, assuming he just got busy with whatever he was doing, but there was radio silence on the other end.

A friendship she was surprised had blossomed so well, considering their flirtatious start to life, was with that of Jack Grealish and Tyrone Mings. There had been more facetimes than she could count between herself and the two villa boys. Whether it was Tyrone telling her about a book he had finished that he thought she would enjoy, or Jack asking her how to cook dinner, maybe even them both cooking dinner together - of course she had to have a later dinner to be able to do so, with the time difference and all...and there was no way Jack was going to be having dinner an hour early “athlete’s schedule an all tha ya’know” he would smirk down the camera, brummie accent on full display.

She met Tyrone through Jack, he facetimed the girl for outfit advice one night before going out with the tall defender and the pair hit it off. Both giving Jack the fashion advice he needed but didn’t want to hear (a Gucci two piece tracksuit set is never the answer). Tyrone immediately noticed a certain attention to detail being applied by his fellow number 10, to the tactics that were being put forward by the girl that was far too good at her job. His training was improving, his set pieces having a certain amount of flare. There was also a lack of attention being paid from Jack to other girls. Instead, much preferring to spend the evening at home watching the same netflix series as Amelia so that he could discuss it with her the next day, or better yet, at the same time.

As pre-season had commenced, Amelia had been applying the same tactics that she developed (and that obviously worked) throughout the European campaign to her Juventus club level. Having faith in the four men that were with her and the Azzurri to ensure that their other teammates were completing them accurately. It appears that her skill was widely recognised, having a few missed calls and voice messages left from English telephone numbers that she was yet to listen to. In all seriousness, she was nervous to listen to them. Worried that they would make her an offer she couldn’t refuse. A wise person once told her that you shouldn’t make any decisions whilst you're at the top of your happy, or the bottom of your sad. You should make important decisions when your life is at its constant. It's very easy to accept things that you wouldn’t normally when you're at the peak of your mood, just as easy as it is to forget the bigger picture when you're down. Who knew Kyle Walker was so wise.

“So, i’ve got a bit of a dilemma” She spoke down to her facetime camera one evening in early August.

“Hit me with it darlin’” Jack spoke back to her, getting his dinner utensils out so that they could cook together again. He didn’t like not being prepared for her tutorial, he got stressed if she added pepper and his pepper was still in his pantry. Each afternoon, when it was agreed upon what they would be cooking together that evening, she sent him a list of what he would need out on his bench to complete the meal.

“I’ve missed a few calls from English teleco numbers this last week or so”

“Ok? Do you think they’re scams? You’re beautiful Amelia but I don't think it's actually an Egyptian prince on the other end that wants to offer you 250k in exchange for your paypal info…”

“Ha ha very funny - that was one time ok and he wasn’t a Prince, he was claiming to be an investment banker and wanted to help me start up my portfolio-ANYWAY JACK I WAS 16! God just forget I even told you that story” Amelia barked down facetime, now pausing what she was doing to point at the British boy with her wooden spoon, the same way her mother would to her when she was being cheeky. All she was met with was boisterous laughter.

“Nah i’m only joking, continue with your story.”

“I began to listen to the start of one and it was a talent acquisition manager for one of the premier league clubs, offering me a job” Amelia said as she continued to stir her pasta. Tonight they were making penne arrabiata. She received no reply from the boy. Looking down to her camera to check the call was still active, she saw him looking at the camera with a serious expression.

“Are you going to tell me what the problem is before I start to get excited that you’re going to be living within driving distance from me? Oh god i’ve just realised - was it from Villa? You could be even closer than I imagined” Jack started to ramble, getting over excited with the prospect of being so close to the girl that he could physically hang out with her, instead of virtually.

“Jack calm down, I didn't listen long enough to find out what club he was from. I have 5 more just like it waiting in my inbox.”

“What's the problem then Mils?” Jack could see the girl had apprehension written all over her face.

“I’m just nervous that they're going to tell me everything I've always wanted to hear. That they’re going to make me an offer I can't refuse and I have to leave my life here.” Their pasta was ready to be dished up now, so the girl poured herself a glass of red wine and got herself comfy on her couch.

“Come on, play the messages and i’ll listen to them with you, be your voice of reason,” Jack offered the girl.

“I should probably call Tyrone, you’re just going to reject every club that isn’t Villa.” she laughed before switching facetime to her laptop, moving to the floor of her lounge room and resting her elbows on her coffee table. With the phone near the screen of her mac, she began to play the messages.

_____________________________________________________________

“Hi Amelia, Shaun here from Newcastle United-” “As if you’d waste your talents at Newcastle”

“Jack! That's horrible! At least i know i already look good in the black and white striped kit”

“No, not happening. Next”

“Amelia, Hope you don’t mind but I got your number off of one of my players who knows you. Long story short, we have a position here are Arsenal” “Bloody Bukayo, needs to keep his silky mitts off ya”

“Jack, give it a rest or i’m calling Tyrone”

“Amelia White, Greg here from Aston Villa Football Club” “Get in Greggles!! That's it, stop listening, you’re taking this one”

“I need to listen to them all Jack”

“So, you’ll consider Villa?”

“I’ll consider all of them”

“You’d really go to Arsenal? Aren’t you a Spurs supporter? Shocking stuff”

“Ok maybe not all of them”

“Ciao Amelia, Mario here from Chelsea Football Club - I’ve heard nothing but good things about you. We could really use you here at Chelsea next season. Give me a call when you get a spare moment to discuss the opportunity”

“What? Nothing to say to this one, Jack?”

“Nah, sounds ok. You deserve to showcase your skills at a big club like Chelsea. And besides, you’ll have Jorginho there to look after you. Come on, next one”

“It’s the last one actually”

“Amelia, we’ve got a fantastic opportunity here at Manchester City for someone with your skill set. It would be a massive advantage to have your tactical insight to the game coupled alongside the fantastic leadership we’ve already got at the club”. “Holy shit, Pep called you himself? Kyle Walker really knows how to pull strings when he wants something”

“I am overwhelmed”

“Hey, you don’t need to make any decisions right now. Sleep on it, talk it over with your family. Speak to Jorgi, I know you’re close with him. And just let me know when you decide to pick Villa so i can start house huntin’ for ya”

“Night Jack, speak soon”

“Sleep tight darlin’, speak to ya tomorrow”

Part 7. | settima parte

[nctzenluvies]

HIS PARTY

𝖏𝖊𝖔𝖓𝖌 𝖏𝖆𝖊𝖍𝖞𝖚𝖓 𝖝 𝖋. 𝖗𝖊𝖆𝖉𝖊𝖗

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉𝖘 : 1.7k

𝖒𝖆𝖐𝖎𝖓𝖌 𝖔𝖚𝖙 , 𝖈𝖚𝖗𝖘𝖎𝖓𝖌 , 𝖉𝖗𝖎𝖓𝖐𝖎𝖓𝖌 , 𝖜𝖊𝖊𝖉 , 𝖘𝖒𝖚𝖙 , 𝖉𝖊𝖌𝖗𝖆𝖉𝖎𝖓𝖌 , 𝖗𝖆𝖜 𝖘𝖊𝖝

~~~~~~~~~~

you were walking outside of the school and of course, it was a friday, meaning everyone was getting their invites to the popular kids "frat party". all you knew about the parties, is that they consisted of drinking, weed, and apparently drugs too. you genuinely didnt expect for anyone invite you.

"hey, y/n!" someone said behind you.

"hi?"

"remember? its me, cay!"

"oh yeah! hi! whats up?"

"well, i got permission to invite some people to this weekends party, and we had a few extra slots so, i thought to invite you!"

"oh? sure, i can go.. but when is it?"

"tomorrow night, i can text you the address, your number is still the same right?"

"yeah, it is. thanks so much!"

"of course, do you need a ride?"

"no thanks, ill have my friend drop me off."

cay walked away and went to the back of the school as you got into the bus and sat next to one of your friends, that happened to also be invited to tomorrows party.

after about 10 minutes, the bus had finally made it to you and your friends neighborhood. you got off the bus, said your goodbyes to your friend and walked home. once you got home, you went up to your room and unpacked your things.

"dude, i cant believe we both got invited to that tomorrow." your friend said on the phone.

"i know! should we make outfits?"

"uh.. yess?!"

the two of you made outfits and got opinions from one another. your friend had to hang up because their mom called them, so you just decided to make a list of stuff you needed to bring.

"gum... chapstick, tissues? do i need that?"

you threw what you could pack now into your bag, and got pajamas to go take a shower.

you took a quick shower, and went down to your kitchen to make food. you made something simple with what you had in your fridge. after eating, you watched netflix for an hour or two, then went to your room to sleep.

~~~~~

𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓅.. 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓅.. 𝒷𝑒𝑒𝓅..

your alarm went off, it was 10 in the morning. you got up, and got ready in a comfy outfit for the day. you had planned to spend a few hours with your cousins at the mall, then go home and get ready for the party.

your cousin picked you up, you guys went do the mall, got coffees, ate food, and shopped around for 3 hours.

your friend was at a store nearby, so she went to come pick you up.

"hey! did you have fun?" she asked.

"yeah, i got a bunch of stuff haha."

"thats good! you could use something for tonight!"

"true, is that what youre wearing tonight?"

"no, i just went to the shop to get groceries, so of course not."

"thats what i thought."

you two blasted music on the way back to her house. you got there, helped he put the groceries away, and walked back to your house. you just chilled for about an hour before getting ready.

you hopped out of the shower, and called your friend.

"hey, y/n. whats up?" cay answered.

"nothing, i just wanted to ask if there was a specific timing we needed to be there?"

"nope, you just have to be there by nine."

"oh alright. see ya!"

you dried you hair, and got a cute dress your cousin had bought you at the mall. you were packing a bag and your best friend called you.

"hey y/bsf/n, why you callin me?"

"nothing, i just wanted to let you know im leaving soon. so get your bag ready."

"will do."

you finished packing, got a water bottle, went to the bathroom, and walked out to see y/bsf/n waiting in her car out-front of your house.

"hey bitch! get in, lets go!"

the two of you headed out, screaming about each others outfits.

you pulled into a huge driveway leading up to a mansion. of course, the popular kids cars were pulling in as you parked.

"oh hey y/n!" cay said behind you.

"hey!"

"well, welcome i guess? let me show you around."

he showed you around his friends house, as someone caught your eye.

you pointed towards some really cute guy in the corner, "hey cay, who is that?"

"oh him? thats jaehyun, hes one of my best friends."

"ok, thanks."

"no problem.

you and your friend walked away to get a drink from the bar they had.

"girllll you have good eyes." your friend teased.

"what do you mean?"

"that jaehyun dude was cute."

"i know right."

"you should go talk to him! your hot, hes hot, perfect relationship!"

"fine, i will. be right back."

"ok, ill be over here!"

you walked over to the boy you had been looking at for a bit and said hi.

"hey, thought i just let you know i think your hot." you winked, walking away.

he twirled you back around, "well, i would say those feelings are mutual then."

"oh? show me then."

"with pleasure."

he pulled you upstairs to a room somewhere in the back of the house, and locked the door behind him.

it was dark in the room, so you couldnt exactly see him, but when he turned the lights up, he was already completely naked. he had the best abs youd seen in a while. man did you get the worst butterflies. he got on top of you, and tore your clothes.

"your a little slut, arent you."

"maybe."

he snickered, kissing your jawline, going down to your stomach. he threw your legs to the side, kissing the inside of your thighs. he threw your legs on his shoulder, giving you kitten licks, teasing you. jaehyun let go of your legs to say something.

"i never got your name, sweetheart."

"y/n."

"y/n?"

"yup."

"cute."

he continued his teasing, but gave you zero warning that he was going to actually eat you out.

"jaehyun!"

"mhm?" he said, sending a wave of vibrations through your body, causing you to almost moan.

after a bit, he let go of your pussy, "moan loader baby." so of course, you did. the more noise you made, the more he smirked probably thinking you couldnt feel it. at some point he started using his tongue way more aggressively, so you grabbed his head pushing him deeper in your folds.

he suddenly let go, looking straight in your eyes.

"you cant cum yet. your turn."

he got to the side of the bed, pulled you closer to him, and shoved his dick straight in your mouth. beside gagging at first, you did your job perfectly by how he was reacting.

he pushed you down away from him, and got back on top of you.

"youre going to listen to daddy, right?"

you nodded.

"you will stay completely silent until i say so."

he lined his cock up with your core and slammed straight in you, filling you up. he immediately went in and out of you, leading to you making a bunch of noise. he put a hand around your neck to shut you up.

"you stay quiet, remember?"

you nodded, trying your best to stay quiet. there was a bunch of people coming up the stairs, probably looking for jaehyun.

"jaehyun?" one of his friends yelled from the end of the hallway.

what sounded like two people came up to the door, stopped and listened. you held your breath, but jaehyun on the other hand just continued.

"oh shit, hes blowing someones back out."

"yeah, already? the party just started. i wonder who it is." your friend cay said.

"dude. lets go ask around and see who were missing."

"yeah."

𝑜𝒽 𝓈𝒽𝒾𝓉 , you thought to yourself. jay was going to figure out that your were being gut-fucked by his best friend, let alone, one of the most popular people in the building.

luckily as soon as your best friend heard people we're asking around, she texted you saying she'd be at the back of the house so she wouldn't get found out.

"oh shit!" you screamed.

the two of you reached your highs about the same time. all you felt was this warm liquid filling you up like crazy. he pulled out, picked you up and brought you to the bathroom. luckily he had brought you to bedroom that had a bathroom.

he cleaned you up first, cleaned himself up, and got you both dressed. jaehyun dragged you out of the bedroom, telling you to go to the back of the house after seeing your phone text message.

you ran down stairs, out the front door and saw your friend right on the side of the house.

"hey!" she yelled

"hi."

"so, how was it?"

"good, hes so hot oh my god."

"well, look who it is."

"hello, im jaehyun, y/n's new boyfriend."

you looked at him, confused.

"wait, wait, we never agreed to that." you sighed.

"we did now."

"ok, ill leave you guys alone, good bye." your friend ran back into the house.

"jaehyun, really?"

"what."

"ive known you for like fifteen minutes."

"a good fifteen minutes." he winked.

"jaehyun!"

you turned around to see cay yelling for jaehyun.

"hi?"

"im going to go over there." you whispered, pointing to the fence of the property.

"well, who was it?"

"who was what?"

"ya know, the chick you had in the room." cay said.

"oh, that? her." he pointed to you, causing you to look up.

"fucking seriously? ive been friends with her for a while and she never has hooked up with someone like you man."

"well i guess you can say hook up if you want."

"huh?"

jaehyun signaled you to come back over.

he wrapped his hand around your waist, "this is my girlfriend."

"uh, what? im so confused. havent you known each other for like 30 minutes?"

"yeah, but shes hot."

"alright, ive never seen that happen."

cay walked away, leaving the two of you to walk in together. you and jaehyun just drank all night, and went back to your house, eating and watching movies.

𝔞/𝔫: 𝔦 𝔨𝔫𝔬𝔴 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔰 𝔰𝔲𝔠𝔨𝔰 𝔞𝔰𝔰 𝔦𝔪 𝔟𝔬𝔯𝔢𝔡 𝔰𝔬 𝔦 𝔴𝔯𝔬𝔱𝔢 𝔱𝔥𝔦𝔰 :)

[bugsy-maria]

Destial (Cass x Reader)

Ok, I know that the title is misleading but this is about one-sided love.

(Y/N)'s POV

"What if he doesn't like me back?" Cass said pacing back and forth at the foot of my bed.

"There is no need to worry, Cass," I said getting up from my bed and over to him. I grabbed his hands, making him stop. "He loves you so much I know he does, anyone would be lucky to have you. you are so amazing and perfect every day," I said looking into the electric blue eyes that I loved so much.

"But what if-"

"There is no what if, if he says no then he's the one missing out. but the probability of him saying no is nonexistent. ok?" I still held his hands.

"Ok," he said back.

"You ready?" I looked at him more intently.

"I think so."

"Well, you better because it's now or never," I said smiling and walking to the door. the angel following. we both made our way to the library. we saw only Dean in there doing something on his computer. sam would have been there too but he had a date tonight that would go into the wee hours of the night. I felt a hand on my shoulder, I turned to see Cass staring at me before saying,

"I think I should do this alone, you can wait in the kitchen."

"Of course! remember what we practiced ok?" I smiled

"Of course."

"Go get 'em, tiger!" I gave a closed-eyed smile and patted him on the back. I opened my eyes to see the love of my life walk off to someone else. he looked over his shoulder and I gave a thumbs up in response. once he turned away I walked to the kitchen.

it was about 5 minutes later when I heard a crash from the library. I jolted up and ran down the hall to see Castiel's shiny blue eyes and the shadows of his wings on the wall.

"Dean go!" I shouted, I grabbed an angel blade from a drawer as dean left the bunker.

"You said that he wouldn't say no." I heard Cass' low monotone voice.

"I know but-"

"You lied to me."

"Castiel I know I lied but I did it for good reason. I gave you hope yes but it was better for you to ask him with confidence or ask him scared. now calm down before someone gets hurt!" I shouted walking to him with the blade at my side. I wasn't going to stab him, it was for insurance.

"Well he would have said no either way!" he shouted, turning to me and throwing books in my direction. I knelt over after getting hit over and over again.

"Exactly! there's no use in crying over spilled milk Cass! there is nothing you could have done." he flung the weapons display causing knives to fly at me. I screamed in pain when a knife stabbed me in the shoulder.

I did what I didn't want to do but it was obvious that he wasn't going to calm down anytime soon. I light my lighter and threw it on the holy oil circle we made months ago when we thought Michael was going to come after us. I walked over to the wall and leaned against a bookshelf. I grab my shoulder, hoping to stop some of the blood loss.

"Cass you need to calm down," I grunted

"It's easy for you to say," he mumbled, his wings now gone but his eyes still glowing a bit.

"I know how you feel Cass, but trust me when I say that you have the easy rejection."

"You don't know anything!" he shouted, staring at me, mad and not caring that he had stabbed me.

"It's a good thing he said no. if he said yes, your whole relationship would have been one-sided, and trust me you don't want that. the first real love of my life I dated for a bit. a month before he broke up with me and left me for my friend. and during that whole month, I blamed myself for him feeling bad because I loved him so much I thought that if I was the one feeling bad then he could be happy. and when we dated again I loved him so much but I also knew that if he didn't love me anymore, he'd break up with me. I knew that the relationship was one-sided so I spent that month I had with him happy but in pain. so trust me you have the easy fix." I looked at him the whole time, tears leaving my eyes, not from the pain of the knife but the pain of the memories.

his eyes dimmed and he visibly relaxed.

"Now if you promise to be calm we can work through it. we can go see a movie, or even stay in and watch tv all day and never leaving your bed. you can cry all you want and I'll be there for you and you'll soon be out and about in no time. it'll be ok, and I'm not lying this time." I got up and walked to the ring of fire.

"That sounds nice." a sad smile spread across his face.

"Ok." I grabbed a bottle of water from the table and poured it onto the fire. I went up to him and hugged him. it hurt like hell because of the knife on my arm but I didn't care. I just wanted him to be happy again. I felt him snake his arm around me. we stood like that for some time before I felt the knife get pulled from my arm, but was soon healed.

"Sorry for hurting you," he mumbled when I let go, still holding onto his hand.

"No need, want to go into hiding now?" I looked into his blue orbs that looked at the ground. with a quiet 'yes' we were on our way. we spent weeks in his room watching all of the stupid tv shows that were on Netflix. he cried all that he could and I was there for him the whole way.

"How do you know how to comfort me in this situation if you never been through it before," he mumbled into my chest, about two daying into the third week.

"Sam did the same thing with me when I found out that the person I loved didn't love me back." I smiled while petting his hair.

"Did you ever tell them that you loved them?"

"No, but they told me that they loved someone else and wanted my help to tell them."

"I'm sorry." he sniffled

"No, it's not your fault you loved someone else." I smiled. "But that's what love makes you do, you let them go so they could be happy. cause at the end of the day, it's not being with them that makes you happy, it's seeing them being happy. wether it's with you or not."

"Thank you."

"Of course." I kissed the top of his head, resting my head on the bedboard, closing my eyes.

[nbrook29]

101, 104 and 110 for the dialogue prompts 🖤

Hello!

101. “I’m ok, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

104. “You weren’t supposed to laugh! I’m so embarrassed!”

The 110 one is not included here, but I also got it from someone else so it's gonna be filled later :)

* * *

Robbe hears the doorbell coming from downstairs, but he stays put, knowing his mom is in the kitchen so she’ll open the door while he adds two last sentences to his final history essay. He’s clicking ‘save’ when there’s a knock on his door, and without waiting for a response, Sander’s smiling face pops from behind it.

“I didn’t say you could come in,” Robbe grins at him cheekily, standing up from his swivel chair for the first time in hours. He immediately pulls Sander into his bedroom, looping his arms around his neck as the boy kicks the door closed behind him, licking into Robbe’s mouth in no time.

He feels a light slap on his butt as a response to his words, and then Sander disentangles himself from him to flop dramatically on the bed, a groan leaving his mouth.

“I’ve just participated in the dullest lecture known to humanity,” he complains, pouting at Robbe. “I need you to entertain me or I’mma die of boredom tonight.”

Sander’s pleading eyes make him snort, but he grabs his laptop and joins him on his bed, rearranging the pillows to make it more comfortable for them to sit straight.

“Okay, drama queen, what do you wanna watch?”

“I get to choose tonight?” Sander’s face lights up with excitement and it’s adorable how little it takes to make him look like that. When Robbe nods, amused, he gets a kiss on his shoulder as a thank you before Sander turns his attention to the screen where Robbe started the endless scrolling on Netflix.

He’s a picky viewer so eventually Robbe leaves him with his computer and goes to the kitchen to make them popcorn and grab some chips. It’s where he’s confronted by his mom who catches him midwalk back to the bedroom to gently remind him that she’s staying home tonight and not going out and that please take that into account, honey. And then she shoots him a wink and now it’s Robbe who’s going to die.

Of shame.

Beet red and mortified, Robbe enters his room and at Sander’s questioning look he tells him his mom basically requested them to keep quiet this time. Unsurprisingly, Sander is unaffected, grinning at Robbe like it’s funny.

“It’s all your fault, by the way,” Robbe accuses him, thinking back to last Friday night.

“You’re right, I’m so sorry I’m so good in bed you can’t contain the noise you ma-”

He doesn’t manage to finish his sentence, cut off by the popcorn Robbe throws at him.

“Who’s being a drama queen now?!”

“My mom heard us, Sander, do you understand how embarrassing that is?!”

Sander rolls his eyes and pulls at his sleeve to make him sit back on the bed, careful not to spill the bowl full of popcorn.

Once he has him where he wants him, sulky eyes on him, he frames his face with his hands and says placatingly, “This isn’t a big deal, Robbe.”

Robbe looks very unconvinced so Sander leans in to catch his frowning lips in a kiss to ease his worries.

Then he claps his hands, nodding at the screen. “Look, I chose a movie for us?”

Robbe turns around reluctantly to check it out and cocks his brow when he sees the newest horror that everybody’s been talking about.

“You really want to watch this?”

“You don’t?”

“No, I do, I love horror movies, but knowing you I thought you’re gonna choose some psychological drama.”

Sander shrugs. “I wanna see what the hype is all about.”

It’s a surprising turn of events, but Robbe is not going to question it any longer because he really wants to see that movie. They turn the lights off and get comfortable on the bed, sitting upright for the time being to avoid choking on the popcorn. But Robbe is not capable of having Sander in his bed right next to him and not having any type of body contact so he innocently swings his leg on his lap, scooching a little closer, a small smile blooming on his face when Sander doesn’t even question it, just starts drawing random patterns on his sweatpants-clad thigh.

An hour into the movie and Robbe is having so much fun because it’s just the right amount of scary combined with some weird psycho shit and frankly, that’s his all time favorite combination. He’s been feeding Sander chips for the last ten minutes, his arm absent-mindedly traveling between the bowl and his boyfriend’s mouth as he himself has been completely engrossed into the movie, eyes wide and jaw dropped, not paying much attention to his surroundings.

It’s why he doesn’t notice the slow but steady attempts of Sander’s to merge his body into Robbe’s. It’s only when he turns to him to comment on the latest jump scare he realizes half of Sander’s face is hidden in Robbe’s left sleeve, eyes wide and scared as they peek reluctantly at the screen.

“Sander?”

“Yeah?” he squeaks out.

“Are you scared?”

“No.”

That earns him a doubtful look, and Sander had to realize he’s not very convincing at the moment because his shoulders drop, the defensive look on his face replaced with resignation.

“I have a confession to make,” he takes a deep breath as if he was about to drop a bomb on Robbe. “Horror movies terrify me.”

Robbe blinks at him in confusion. “But you were the one who chose this one for us to watch.”

“I thought I got over it. I was wrong. I was so wrong.”

It’s not that funny. Really, it isn’t. But there’s something about the face Sander is making that pulls an involuntary giggle out of him.

His boyfriend’s not very happy about that.

“Shut up, you weren’t supposed to laugh!” he whines at him, accusation in his voice, and his cheeks couldn’t be redder if they tried, Robbe notices as Sander hides them in his hands. “I’m so embarrassed.”

“I’m sorry!” he pauses the movie and turns fully to him. “I’m not laughing at you, I swear. It’s actually kinda adorable,” Robbe adds in a soothing tone, trying to remedy the situation, but Sander’s not very happy about that particular comparison.

“Great, now I’m adorable, that’s so much better,” he mutters grumpily, and then he ostensibly leans away from the kiss Robbe’s about to place on his cheek in order to pacify him.

“Seriously?”

His question is met with silence as Sander keeps being stubborn, still offended.

“Play the stupid movie.”

“Are you su-”

“Yes!”

Robbe has to bite his lip to keep from laughing again, knowing it wouldn’t be well received. He’s not exactly worried about Sander being mad at him right now because he’s well aware of having a couple of tricks up his sleeve to smooth his ruffled feathers. For now, he resorts to pressing “play” and trying not to coo at Sander’s pouty face.

The movie only gets scarier and more twisted since then onwards. For Robbe, it’s top entertainment, but when he glances surreptitiously at Sander’s face it’s ghost-white, and something tells him it’s not only because of the light from the screen. And it’s not like Robbe actually enjoys seeing his boyfriend suffer.

“Are you alright?” he asks softly, hand reaching to rub his thigh in what he hopes is a comforting touch.

“Yes, I’m okay, thank you. Just please, stop talking to me.”

Okay, still mad then.

Robbe keeps his hand where he put it and counts it as a win when Sander doesn’t swat it away.

They get to hour and 40 minutes, an hour of the movie still ahead of them when Sander reaches his breaking point.

“Fuck, I don’t care anymore, call me a wuss or whatever, but please turn it off, I’m done,” he groans, a pained expression on his face as he brings his legs in and hugs his knees, looking like a little boy and breaking Robbe’s heart a little.

He shuts the computer right away, his bedroom swamped in darkness as a result, only the moonlight creeping in through the big window making it possible for him to see Sander’s pale face. He gathers him into his arms, grateful he’s not putting up a fight and instead eagerly letting Robbe hold him.

“Do you honestly think I’m gonna call you a wuss? Especially in not, like, a teasing way?”

The shrug he gets as a response is miniscule, but it’s there.

He sighs, nosing along Sander’s hairline and pressing a kiss to his forehead which makes Sander cuddle even more into him. Robbe takes that as a sign of forgiveness for his previous unfortunate laughter.

"I kinda know you wouldn't, but... I want you to think I'm, you know, cool and stuff," comes a small voice from under Robbe's jaw.

Awwww.

"But I will always think you're cool and stuff."

"Yeah?" Sander blinks at him with his insecure eyes.

"Yeah."

He places his head back in the nook of Robbe's neck, nuzzling in like a cat.

"Okay."

"Okay."

They're silent for a few seconds before Robbe speaks again.

"Can I kiss you now?"

"Yes, I'll allow it."

Robbe snorts, fingers tangling in the brown strands as he angles Sander's head for a proper kiss and once he's done with him, his cheeks look much more human-like, blood flowing back to his face.

"Wanna watch stupid TikTok videos for a change?"

Sander nods against his chest, a smile on his lips now.

His arm tightens around Robbe's waist as he says, "I hope you're aware I'm sleeping here tonight cause there's no way in hell I'm gonna be alone in bed after this shit."

[watchyourbluesturngolden]

I’ll never stop loving you

Ok, so, this is very heavy. This piece is about eating disorders. As always, this is only about my personal experience. This is probably very triggering, so I don’t recommend reading if you think this will be upsetting. 

This was not easy for me to write. I kind of just started writing one day when I was feeling really bad about myself and then it just kept getting longer. I decided to post it because I know there have to be some other people out there who have these same feelings, and I want to help them feel less alone. 

warnings: eating disorders, calorie counting, insecurity, hospitals/medical stuff

word count: 4.9k

Y/N held back a sigh as she unlocked her phone. She glanced up to make sure Harry's back was still turned before she opened her calorie counting app and entered the apple she had eaten earlier. 

95 calories. That wasn't really so bad. Well... she battled with her thoughts a bit. No, it was fine. If she didn't eat anything else this evening, besides the pasta he was making, that would bring her to just below 500 calories for the day. Perfect. Y/N's relationship with food was... complicated. She had been overweight as a child, and even now she really struggled to keep from gaining weight. At her last doctor's appointment she had been told to try exercising and eating more greens. She desperately wanted to lose weight, but she also had a very hard time staying away from junk food. 

There had been more than one occasion where she's snuck to the kitchen after she was sure Harry was asleep and eaten everything she could get her hands on. She always felt terrible afterwards. She was physically in pain, but the worst part was how ashamed she was.  She often sat on the kitchen floor, crying and wondering what to do. She hadn't resorted to purging, but honestly that was only because she couldn't make it work. She had tried. Several times. She wasn't sure if it was physical or psychological, but she just couldn't. So, most of the time, she just restricted. 

It had been easy when Y/N started, but since she started dating Harry 8 months ago, it was much harder to keep this secret. It was manageable since they didn't live together, but he was very perceptive and asked her several times a day if she was hungry or if she had eaten. She had gotten very good at lying. 

A simple "not really, I actually ate just before you got here," or a "yes, I finished the pizza we made" was enough to satisfy his questions. She could rattle off these answers without missing a beat. Luckily, he never noticed how much food got thrown in the garbage. Every so often, she could tell he was suspicious. That's why she always made sure to let him see her eating at least once a week.

  Even though she was essentially starving herself, Y/N wasn't seeing any results. She had actually gained a pound in the last month. After she saw this, she didn't eat anything for almost 3 whole days. Harry had been away on business, so he didn't see when she nearly collapsed in the shower. He didn't hear her crying at night because she felt so hopeless. She hid it all from him. 

She had only felt more determined to lose weight since that incident. 

"So, I was thinking we'd watch a movie tonight while we eat. Maybe a Christmas one?" Harry pulled her out of her thoughts, turning away from the stove. She quickly closed the app and smiled up at him. 

"Sure, I'll go pick one out," She said, getting up from the table, taking her phone with her.

Harry was a little confused. She usually had no problem with him looking at her phone; they often used each other's interchangeably. They knew each other's passwords and their fingers could unlock the other's phone. Lately, though, she would quickly turn off her screen whenever he looked in her direction. He trusted her completely, but he knew something was going on. 

Y/N was searching through the list of Christmas movies on Netflix. She loved watching them, but they were so upsetting at the same time. The main character was always so skinny, so effortlessly beautiful. Of course she knew it wasn't real, but... still. She knew she would probably never look like that.

Y/N finally picked one. It looked incredibly cheesy, so hopefully she could focus on that instead of how skinny the main character was. 

She made sure her calorie counting app was cleared from her recent apps and went back to the kitchen. She grabbed two plates, already worried Harry would try to dish her food up for her. Luckily he moved away to wash his hands. She used that time to scoop the smallest amount she could (without causing suspicion) onto her plate. She spread it out as much as possible and took a rather large serving of green beans to make her plate look full. 

He turned back around, frowning slightly.

"That's not very much, love. If you don't like my cooking you can just tell me," He joked. 

"No, you're an excellent chef. I just had a big lunch," she smiled, lying right to his face without a second thought.

"Alright, if you say so. Shall we start our movie?" 

"We shall," Y/N laughed, copying his formal tone. 

He smiled as she walked toward the couch. He absolutely adored her, even though she had a hard time appreciating herself. She had never said anything to him, but he could see it on her face when she spent long amounts of time in front of the mirror, inspecting her appearance from every angle. He couldn't figure out why she felt this way. She was absolutely gorgeous. He didn't want to bring it up until she did, not wanting to push her to talk about anything she wasn't ready to talk about. 

Harry started the movie, settling into the couch. About halfway through, Y/N got up to put her plate away and use the bathroom. Harry noticed she took her phone with her again. 

While she was in the bathroom, Y/N quickly opened her calorie app. She estimated how much she had eaten, then added an extra 1/2 cup just to make sure. Her daily total was... 511 calories. She nearly let out a sob. Tears started forming in her eyes, but she quickly wiped them away. She could 𝘯𝘰𝘵 let Harry see her crying. He was so attentive and loving, and would stop everything to find out what was wrong. She closed the app and splashed some water on her face. Luckily, it was dark in the living room and there would probably be a sad part of the movie she could blame her puffy eyes on. 

She stepped back out into the living room, avoiding Harry's eyes as she sat down. She pretended not to notice his concerned look as she started the movie again. 

Sure enough, about 10 minutes later came the sad scene. The main character was breaking up with her perfect boyfriend, because "they just didn't work". Even though it was very cheesy and Y/N knew they would get back together before the movie ended, she couldn't help but get emotional. All the stress of undereating, recording every bite of food she ate, lying to Harry, and eating more than she planned today was building up. She was just so overwhelmed. She couldn't help when the tears started rolling down her face. Harry didn't notice until he heard her sniffling.

"Oh, love, it’s ok! Don't cry, they'll get back together soon, you know they will," He soothed, moving closer and putting his arm around her. 

Y/N couldn't say anything, but Harry being so close just made her feel worse. She felt too big. She felt like she didn't deserve to have such a loving boyfriend.

"I know, I know, I don't know why I'm so emotional today, I'm sorry," She said, wiping her eyes. 

"Why are you sorry? It’s alright if it gets your heart a little. I just hate to see you so sad," He said, rubbing circles on her shoulder with his thumb. 

Having Harry so close, telling her how much he cared about her, was even more overwhelming. Nevertheless, she tried to keep her tears in so he wouldn't ask any more questions. She managed to hold off, promising herself she could cry to her heart's content once he went home for the night. 

Once the movie ended, Harry moved his arm and kissed her hand. 

"Feeling better now? I told you there'd be a happy ending," He smiled sweetly.

  "Yes, much. You were right," She grinned, which quickly turned into a yawn. Harry checked his phone. 

"Oh, it’s way later than I thought. I better get home, let you get some sleep." He stood up from the couch, stretching. Y/N stood too, walking with him to the door.

  After putting his coat and shoes on, Harry gave her a quick peck on the cheek.

  "I'll text you when I get home. Goodnight, Y/N, love you," he said, smiling.

Y/N blushed. "Love you too, babe." 

She was already feeling worse as she watched him drive away. she opened her calorie app, staring at the numbers. 511. How could she have done this? 511 calories. She felt miserable. She got into her bed, staring up at the ceiling. Against her better judgement, Y/N started thinking about her relationship with Harry. What would happen when Harry wanted to... take it further physically? She could barely handle seeing her own body in the mirror without breaking down, how would she let someone else see her? 

Harry was a good guy, she knew he was. She knew he wouldn't pressure her to do anything she wasn't ready for. But... that really wasn't fair for him. It was unrealistic to expect him to wait forever and, what, never have sex again? She very much doubted he would be ok with that. 

The more she thought about it, the worse she felt. Soon, the tears were rolling down her cheeks again. She did nothing to stop them. 

A few minutes later, her phone dinged. She picked it up and saw it was from Harry. 

"Got home safe. Love you darling, sleep well<3 " 

She texted back, "Love you too, talk tomorrow :)" 

She shut off her phone, not wanting to see his reply that would probably be very sweet and would make her feel worse. 

She laid in bed for hours, feeling miserable and wondering what she was going to do, before she finally fell into a deep sleep. 3 days later (she didn't sleep for 3 days I just didn't know how to make this time skip haha) She startled awake after a very unpleasant nightmare. She dreamed she had finally agreed to be intimate with Harry, but at soon as he had taken her shirt off he started laughing. He broke up with her right then and there, telling her no one would ever want to be with her. 

She hugged her pillow, checking her phone. it was 4 A.M. Great. Now she could either try and fall back asleep or give up and sit on her phone until the sun came up. 

She chose the latter. She swiped away the text from Harry before opening tumblr and scrolling through her feed. Pictures of skeletal girls wearing fishnets, high waisted shorts, dresses, whatever they wanted, flashed across her screen. Y/N decided to continue fasting until the end of the week, then decrease her intake to 300 calories per day. She wasn't making progress at 500, so this had to work. It had to. She didn't have anything else to try. She was already doing yoga for weight loss 2 hours every day and eating next to nothing. This was her last option. She rolled out of bed when the sun started coming up and walked to the bathroom, weighing herself. She sighed, seeing she had only gone down 0.2 pounds. Better than gaining, she thought. 

She changed into leggings and a sweater and rolled out her yoga mat. Y/N found her weight loss yoga series and stretched. She usually did every episode 4 times, just to make sure she was getting the full benefits. 

On her second time starting over, she nearly fainted when get got up from the downward dog. She swayed on her feet, quickly getting down on the floor so she wouldn't fall. She laid there until she felt better, then slowly stood up. She sunk into the couch, deciding to be done with yoga for the day. She was exhausted, and she thought she might really pass out if she kept going. 

Her phone dinged and she picked it up, seeing it was from Harry.

  "Good morning love:) The sky's supposed to be clear tonight, want to come over and stargaze?" 

Y/N smiled. He knew how much she loved the stars. 

"Of course! I'll come over around 8?" 

"Sounds good, see you then:)"

  As long as he didn't try to offer her any food, everything would be fine. This would work. She could just tell him she finished the pasta he made so he wouldn't try to give her supper. Perfect. Y/N pulled one of Harry's hoodies out of her closet, slipping it over her jeans. She loved wearing his clothes. it made her feel small and safe and loved. She scooped the rest of the pasta into the garbage, only feeling a little bad for wasting the food. 

She got into her car and plugged her phone into the car speakers, starting Harry's album. She had been playing it on repeat since it came out. The music was already incredible, but what made it even better was knowing it was about her. Harry clearly felt Y/N was amazing, which was hard for her to process. How could someone who looked like that be in love with her? It didn't seem real. 

By the time she got to the third song, Y/N was almost at Harry's house. She pulled into his driveway and unplugged her phone, giving herself a minute to take a breath. Everything would be fine. She would tell him she had eaten the pasta and he would believe her. Everything would work out.

She turned off the car, walking up the path to Harry's door. He opened it before she even knocked, beaming and pulling her into a hug. 

"I missed you, love," He said, squeezing her tighter. 

"Harry, I saw you 3 days ago," She laughed.

"Yeah, well, that's way too long," He shook his head, pulling away from her a bit. "Did you eat? I can find something quick before we get out there-" 

Y/N quickly cut him off. "No, I'm good, I finished the pasta you made. How does your food still taste amazing, even days after?" 

"I dunno, I guess I'm just magical," He laughed. 

He led her out to the back porch, gesturing at the ladder. 

"I figured we'd sit up on the roof. There's a better view, and... it's more private," He smiled. 

Y/N pretended she didn't know what he was implying. 

"Sounds good!" She began to climb up the ladder. Suddenly, she didn't feel so well. She was dizzy and black spots were appearing in the corners of her eyes. "No, no, no," She thought desperately. "Not again! Just focus, one rung at a time, you can do it." 

Luckily, she got to the top and made it onto the roof safely. She sat on the slightly tilted surface, putting her head between her knees.

Harry's head popped up from the edge of the roof, looking very worried. He rushed over, putting his arm around her. 

"Y/N, are you ok? You don't look so good," He said nervously.

"I'm fine, I'm just..." Y/N tried to think of what to tell him. She couldn't exactly say "I'm  dizzy because I haven't eaten in 3 days" because she had already lied about eating supper. "I'm not a fan of heights." 

"Oh, I'm so sorry, why didn't you tell me? We didn't have to come up here!" He looked like he felt terrible, but Y/N was quick to reassure him. 

"No, it's totally fine, I thought I could handle it a little better. I'm ok, maybe just... don't move your arm?" She moved closer into his side. While she felt self conscious with him so close, she really did feel dizzy and worried she might fall if he moved away. She was also freezing cold, despite the warm air, so she liked having his extra warmth.

"Of course I won't." They sat in silence for a few minutes before Harry spoke again. 

"If... if you're feeling alright now, I'd suggest looking up," He said. She could hear the smile in his voice as she lifted her head. 

"Oh... it's... beautiful," She whispered. 

She had never seen such a clear sky. Billions of stars shone brightly, which was weird since there was usually too much light around to see them. That's when Y/N noticed it was a lot darker than normal. 

"Harry, where are all the street lights?" 

He blushed, looking down. 

"I wanted you to be able to see the stars better, so I got the electrician to turn them off for a few hours. He's an old family friend," Harry explained. "He said he had no problem helping me woo a pretty girl." 

Now it was Y/N who was blushing. 

"Well, it worked. I am very... woo'd," She said. They both laughed before looking back up at the twinkling sky. 

"Oh look, there's... that one constellation!" 

Y/N laughed. "Brilliant, Harry, that ONE constellation." 

He smiled. "No, no, it's... I can't think of the name! it's one of my favorites. it's the one shaped like a W. The one that's a queen, sitting on her throne. This'll drive me crazy if I don't remember it." He reached for his phone, hand patting his empty pocket. "Oh, must've left it in the house. Mind if I use yours?" 

Harry didn't miss the split second of panic that crossed her face. He didn't know that she was frantically wondering if her calorie counting app was still open. She knew she couldn't say no without looking very suspicious, so she faked a smile and handed it over.

Thankfully, he didn't even open her recent apps. He just clicked on the safari icon and typed quickly. 

"That's it! Cassiopeia! The beautiful queen on her throne," He said, handing her phone back to her. "Anyways, I think of you when I see that constellation." 

Y/N smiled. "You see me as a beautiful queen?" 

"Obviously, I do," He said, kissing her cheek. 

For the first time, Y/N didn't feel embarrassed to be in his arms. He had always told her he loved her, but comparing her to a literal queen? A queen made out of stars? That was different. 

Y/N was so happy that she didn't mind when Harry's lips lingered on her cheek, then moved to her jaw. They had never done anything except cuddling, so this was all new to her. She leaned into him, getting lost in the sensations. 

Then she started thinking. She realized where this was going as his lips migrated down her neck. Though she was really enjoying this, she started panicking when she thought about what would happen next. 

Her breathing and pulse sped up. Harry smiled into her neck, thinking it was just her reaction to his touch. Then she was pulling away, or rather, pushing him away.

"Stop, stop, I want to stop!"  

He snapped his head up, backing away and holding his hands in the air to show her he wasn't going to do anything.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I should have asked you before I..." he was also breathing heavily. He knew she was inexperienced and was very nervous to try anything new. 

Y/N felt tears springing to her eyes. 

"I- I have to go," She said, swiping at the tears on her face. 

"Wait, Y/N!" 

She was already climbing down the ladder. As soon as she got down, she ran through his house and to her car. Harry was right on her heels. 

Y/N started her car and drove away as fast as she could. She felt bad because she knew Harry was beating himself up right now, thinking he was the reason she freaked out. She just didn't know what to do. She couldn't explain why she had pushed him away without going into... everything. She couldn't tell him the reason she pushed him away was because she hated her body so much it physically hurt. He would just tell her she was beautiful, and then he would probably figure out she wasn't eating enough. He would force her to recover. And... she couldn't do that until she was skinny. 

She pulled into her driveway, running inside. Before she had even gotten up to her room, she heard Harry pounding on her door. 

"Y/N, open the door!" More pounding. "Y/N, I need to know you're ok! Please, you don't even have to let me in, just... text me or something to let me know you're ok! Please!" He kept pounding on the door. 

Y/N crept up the stairs, ignoring his pleas. She felt awful, but she couldn't do anything. He kept pounding and yelling and she got worried someone would call the police, so she pulled out her phone, sending him a quick text. "i'm fine." 

Then she shut her phone off, jumped in the shower, and cried.

By the time she got out, she didn't hear any more noises. She checked her phone, eyes widening when she saw the 27 missed calls and dozens of texts from Harry.

Her phone started ringing again, but she immediately declined the call when she saw Harry's smile light up her screen. She hoped he would get the message. She silenced her phone, settling into her bed and drifting to sleep.

The next day, Y/N startled awake to more banging sounds. She sat up, leaning over to look out her window. There he was, pounding his fists on her side door. "Well," she thought, "At least there's less chance someone will call the cops on him." 

She heard faint yelling and knew she had to do something. He probably wouldn't leave, at least not until she actually asked him to. It was nearly 3 P.M., and she guessed he had been there all day, if not all night. 

She swung her legs over the side of bed, but a wave of nausea and dizziness hit her as soon as she stood. She took a moment to steady herself before stepping out into the hallway. 

Y/N held the railing with an iron grip as she slowly climbed down the stairs. Black spots began to swim in her vision and she felt even worse than before. Then the room spun around her and she fell. 

Harry's p.o.v. He stopped pounding on the door for a minute to call her again. His phone rang for a while, so at least she wasn't just declining his calls. 

Which... was actually worse. What if she wasn't ok? What if she was hurt, or worse? He knew she hadn't left, he had stayed outside her door all night.

  Right before he started knocking again, he heard it. A very loud crashing sound. It sounded like something had fallen down the stairs.

His eyes drifted to the window and he pressed his face against the glass. His view was distorted through the sheer curtain, but he could make out something on the floor at the bottom of the stairs.

He focused his eyes and gasped when he realized it was Y/N, lying in a heap. He ran back to the door, trying again to open it. When it didn't budge, he went to the front and back doors, trying the same. Finally, he decided what he had to do. Harry ran to the back door so no one on the street would see him and picked up a shovel lying in the garden. He took a deep breath, steadying himself, and rammed it into the glass. He rotated the shovel around, clearing all the shards before he climbed through the hole. 

He ran over to Y/N, dropping to his knees and feeling for a pulse on her neck. He nearly sobbed when he felt her heart beating, though it felt pretty weak. He yanked his phone out of his pocket and dialed 911. 

Harry had been sitting in the waiting room for a few hours when the doctor approached him.

"Mr. Styles?" 

Harry stood up quickly.

"How is she?" 

She's doing fine now. But..." He didn't seem to want to tell Harry something. "Mr. Styles, she is extremely malnourished. She fell down the stairs, you said? It seems the reason for this is because she lost consciousness, because her blood sugar was so low. We usually only see levels like this in people with diabetes." 

"She's... she not diabetic, though," Harry said, confused. "And what do you mean by malnourished? I see her eat all the time." He said, voice faltering a bit.

"From her labs and scans, it would seem she hasn't eaten in several days, maybe a week. She also shows signs of chronic undernourishment, which means she's been eating less than her body needs for a while now.  She is extremely dehydrated, and her electrolytes are very imbalanced." 

"But- how could she- I mean, she doesn't-" Harry couldn't seem to collect his thoughts. "Can I see her?" 

"You can. She's not awake, but I'll take you to her room," He said, leading Harry towards her room.

Harry's eyes teared up when he saw Y/N in the bed. She was connected to several machines, and a nurse explained that they were getting her nutrients up and keeping her hydrated. She looked so fragile.

Harry fell into the chair by her bed, clasping her small hand in both of his. 

"Was she- I mean- was she... starving herself?" Harry's voice broke as he spoke to the nurse. 

She offered a sympathetic look. 

"It appears so, yes." 

"What can I do? how can I fix this?" 

"Mr. Styles-"

"Harry." 

"Harry, you're doing everything you can. We've got her, physically. all you have to do is love her and support her. 

"Right," Harry said, looking down. "Thank you." 

The nurse left the room, leaving the two alone. Harry stared into her face, silently willing her to wake up. She had to wake up. This was all his fault. He must've done something that upset her so much she stopped eating. He thought back to last night on the roof when she had pushed him away. Had she felt like this the whole time? Had she felt so unhappy in their relationship that she was slowly killing herself? 

Y/N's p.o.v.

When Y/N woke up, she was in her bed. No, wait, not her bed. A hospital bed? She looked around, confused. 

She saw Harry, asleep in the chair next to her. She tried to say his name, but she couldn't get out more than a hoarse whisper. 

She looked around, searching for something to get his attention with. She settled on the empty plastic cup next to her, throwing it and hitting him in the shoulder. He jerked awake, eyes darting around until they landed on her. Relief flooded his face as he moved his chair closer.

"Y/N, you have no idea how worried I was about you," Harry said in a soft voice. Tears pooled in her eyes as she grasped his hand. 

"I'm so sorry," She whispered. 

"Just... why? Why did you do this? Is it because of me? Do you..." His voice shook and he took a steadying breath. "Did I do this to you?" 

Y/N shook her head frantically, squeezing his hand. "No, no, Harry, you didn't, I promise, this isn't your fault. It's... I've just... I don't know," Y/N's voice broke off as tears started streaming down her face. 

"It's not your fault, Harry. I-I just... I wanted to be... perfect," Her voice sounded so small. "I wanted to look like the girls in the stupid hallmark movies, who are so skinny and... just gorgeous," She said, still crying. "I wanted to look like them and I just wanted to feel pretty and I just hate my body so much," Her words ran together and got harder to understand as she buried her face in her arms. 

Harry's heart broke a little more with each word she spoke. He stood from his chair, situating himself on the bed next to her and putting his arms around her. They just sat like that, Y/N's shaky breaths slowly settling to match his even ones. He could still hear her sniffling every once in a while, but she had mostly calmed down. 

"I love you more than anything else on this earth, Y/N," Harry said softly. "I don't know what I would ever do without you. I'm so sorry I didn't notice you were going through this. You are the most beautiful woman I've ever laid eyes on, and I don't want to change anything about you." 

Y/N looked up at him. "I think... I think I need help," she said, her voice shaking. Harry just pulled her back against his chest, kissing the top of her head.  

"I will stay with you, always," he murmured. "I know you can get through this. I won't leave your side." 

"No, I... I think I have to go away somewhere," She said, avoiding his eyes.

"If that's what you need to get better, Y/N, then I will support you. I'll visit you as much as they'll let me, as much as you want to see me. I'll do anything for you, to see you get better." 

"I love you so much," She said, eyes welling up with tears again. 

"I love you too," He whispered, pressing a kiss to her forehead. "I'll never stop.”