#like they really just lied to him for fun and took him to commit crimes with them

[beecass]

thinking about how mac's relationship with catholicism has more to do with his relationship with his parents than anything. not to say that he sees himself as jesus christ but he is the only child to an abusive neglective father and an equal neglective mother that does not care about him. he has to carry the cross of not being loved every single day, he feels abandoned. and there he is, in school, a catholic school, that probably made them read the bible as homework, and mac is listening to them talk about families, and the love that god has for mankind and the love he had for jesus, and how mary was a loving kind woman.

and mac reads, in the same bible that talks about family, a mother and a father, he reads about how sins will destroy you, how a man loving another man is wrong. so he thinks about becoming a priest because he is scared he might end up in hell. and his small little brain gathers all that information and creates a safe illusion for him to charish. his desire to be loved the same way jesus was loved is so big he needs to trick himself into thinking that he is already loved that way even if he doesn't feel it.

he was so neglected by his father and mother the only thing left for him that resembled the most with parent love was God and Mary. and with that, of course he couldn't come out for years, in his mind he would still be disapointing his parents.

[itsabouttimex2]

“You need to do better.”

(This gets vitriolic, and is a full-blown criticism of Macaque’s portrayal in Season Four and Five. If criticism of a character/franchise you like upsets you, I do not recommend reading.)

Wow. I had no faith in his character writing, and I’m STILL disappointed.

And it only took one episode! How impressive!

Macaque, who has put in ZERO on-screen effort to become a better person or make amends to his victims, is criticizing Wukong for being a bad mentor! And does Wukong criticize him back? NOPE!

After getting screamed at and berated, does Wukong defend himself? NOPE!

Ooh, but there was a second long reference in a dual yelling match that mentioned that Macaque was a genuinely bad person who took glee in hurting innocent people! Oh, fucking delightful! Ooh, Wukong even points out in one episode that Macaque goes without consequences!

Pointing out a flaw in your writing does not make it less of a flaw.

Macaque will always be allowed to do whatever he wants to anyone he wants- power theft, attempted murder, insults, deceit, assault-

And the narrative and characters will never hold him accountable or force Macaque to look inwards or become a better person.

Macaque will always fall upwards into redemption without any obstacles or pushback.

There will never be a struggle to goodness with a satisfying conclusion. There will never be a moment where falters in his newfound goodness and questions going back to his old ways. There will never be explicit remorse or regret. He will never have deep introspections on his crimes and atrocities that provide a reason for him to want to change.

The sum of his “arc” will always be “you were a good guy all along”, and that lack of depth is where it will stay.

RIP Seasons 1-3 Macaque. You were fun and interesting and cool and lovable.

But the man they replaced you with was destined to be a boring and brooding “anti-hero” who has no real connection to the actions you selfishly and violently performed with your own two hands-

And you will always be a less interesting character for it.

The execution of the actual arc boils down to a single heroic (but ultimately self-serving) moment and then Macaque is immediately forgiven for all the crimes he’s committed and is a magically better person without any effort and nothing he’s done is ever brought up again.

It severely weakens any character’s arc to cut them off from their past actions. If MK forgot his traumas every season instead of carrying them forward- we’d all agree that doing so was a case of poor writing.

It was the reason that people disliked Mei’s portrayal in Season Four- she immediately moved on from the Samadhi Fire arc and “no longer wielded it” after spending a whole season gathering and learning to use it.

Why can’t we agree that it’s bad for Macaque, too?

You can’t “develop” a character by dropping an entire plotline and writing it off with one line.

You can’t “redeem” a character by pretending that they were a good person right from the start.

Sorry, bud.

I really did like you. I just wish I could like your writing.

——————

And, what is more clear to me now than ever?

People only defended Macaque’s shitty writing because they think he’s hot.

I know this now, because I’ve seen white-hot Li Jing arc hatred from fervent Macaque arc defenders.

So we all agree that an “I didn’t really mean it!” isn’t an excuse to abuse the people around you? That you don’t get to mistreat innocent people just because you’re stressed and upset?

Hmmm.

Hmmmmmmm.

I wonder why people despise Jing for his dogshit “one nice thing redeems all your bad actions” arc but love Macaque for his??

(Because they think the monkey is hot.)

The funny thing, though?

Li Jing apologizes to at least one of the victims of his actions. He expresses regret and remorse.

Macaque doesn’t even have that.

——————

Anyways here’s a line that I hate because Macaque has in no way developed enough to have the right to deliver it-

AND NO, SUDDENLY HAVING AN AFFINITY FOR PERFORMING KIND OR SACRIFICIAL ACTS IS NOT GOOD CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

HIM MAGICALLY OFFSCREEN BECOMING A GOOD PERSON WHO CARES ABOUT INNOCENT LIFE IS NOT GOOD CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT

IF ALL IT TAKES TO “BE BETTER” IS ACTING LIKE A HERO, WUKONG IS LITERALLY A THOUSAND TIMES BETTER OF A PERSON THAN HE IS

THIS LINE IS DOGSHIT

“You need to do better.”

Really, Macaque? Maybe you should take your own damn advice- try apologizing to one of the people you tried to hurt and tried to murder in cold blood!

Like when you trapped MK under his staff after stealing his powers and tried to murder him when he was helpless?

Or when you kidnapped MK’s friends and tortured the kid by forcing him to fight them?

Or you led a violent assault against a palace full of innocent people?

Or violently beat his dear friends until they were screaming in pain?

Or assaulted Tang, who posed no threat to you?

Or threatened to murder an innocent girl if you didn’t get your way, then ran away (and encouraged MK to abandon her) first thing when it put her into a life-threatening meltdown of raw power?

(Isn’t it cool how NONE of these people have interesting or varied reactions to him doing this and ALL immediately are cool with him like a gelatinous hivemind.)

(Oooh ONE mildly questioning line from Pigsy but no anger over his adoptive son nearly being killed multiple times over)

(Isn’t it cool that no one has complex or interesting thoughts on this.)

(Isn’t it cool that by robbing them of unique feelings on the matter they robbed Macaque and the Monkie Kids of compelling and interesting interactions that could’ve helped flesh out their personalities and strengthen their characterization.)

(Isn’t it cool that Macaque and the Monkie Kids are actively denied intriguing character dynamics so Macaque’s shitty “redemption arc” can happen faster.)

(Isn’t that cool.)

Why don’t YOU do better, Macaque?

(In a way that is more satisfying than “one kind-hearted speech from a kid that I tried to murder changed my mind and now I am a better person but all my character development happened offscreen and without personal introspection”, at least.)

Also what the fuck do you mean by “do better”?

Be heroic and put your life in danger? He already does that! He’s done it more than you have!

Just tell MK that he’s not alone? YOU COULD DO THAT YOURSELF, MACAQUE!

Help MK with his traumas and fears? MK doesn’t tell anyone about those! He keeps them bottled up, lock and key, and actively refuses attempts to help!

Wukong TRIED to reach out to him, and MK PUSHED HIM AWAY! Was he supposed to tie the fucking kid down and torture the information out of him?

He respected MK’s boundaries by not pushing any further and letting him leave!!

WHY IS THAT A BAD THING??

What the fuck, man

[weena-mercator]

Inbetween reblogging all the fun “unnecessary feelings day” stuff, I’d like to touch on the bigger part of what’s happening here.

I think that for the most part all the giddiness about it which produces all the fanart and other “gay gay homosexual gay” posts probably originates from the same way I see it… which is that it’s fun and silly to point at Miles “Gay Disaster” Edgeworth but also understanding that this line is really more like 70% about questioning his morals and place in the legal system and 30% about Phoenix (along with some deeply buried feelings he’s not ready to admit at all yet)

(admittedly I only got in Ace Attorney in 2019 and then didn’t get really into it until this year, so… apologies if this is all very obvious. But I guess new people are joining the fandom every day, so if you’ve been around a long time this is nothing new to you I’m sure - for others maybe they’re just now exploring this stuff)

Edgeworth is struggling with the fact that he’s now questioning everything he’s been taught to believe when it comes to the law and prosecuting. And why? Because of Phoenix.

Phoenix has opened his eyes to the fact that not all those who are deemed guilty by the police are actually guilty, that not everyone lies because they’re guilty and committed the crime, but perhaps they didn’t commit the crime and they lie for some other reason (they’re not guilty but worried the truth about something will make it look like they are, they want to protect someone, etc.).

“Unease… and uncertainty.”

Edgeworth is uncomfortable with acknowledging that his whole belief system is fracturing after Phoenix comes back into his life. He is absolutely not okay with feeling anything but certain. And sure, a lot of that belief system was probably born out of a) survival under MvK’s roof and b) some self-inflicted punishment because even though supposedly Yanni Yogi murdered his father - they still managed to be found not guilty, so he can’t help but wonder if that verdict was right, maybe Yogi really is not guilty because he himself might be the guilty one… He can’t know for sure, but the last thing he remembers is throwing the gun, the gunshot, a scream - it haunts him nightly. But the nightmares are reminder enough of his possible guilt, so he tries not to dwell on it during his conscious hours if possible, he’s got a job to do: get guilty verdicts for others. But he’s not going to say either of these reasons out loud for sure (at least not for a bit), so it’s easier to try to convince himself and others that he is following in MvK’s footsteps under the guise of the man who murdered my father was declared not guilty because of a flaw in the legal system so I will do whatever is in my power to ensure all those charged with a crime do not escape the punish of the law.

And as a cherry on top, who is the one bringing all of these feelings of unease and uncertainty to the surface? Phoenix Wright. A childhood friend he hasn’t seen since he lost his father. Someone he must have really cared about as a child, surely - there’s too much indication that they were very close for a while before Miles disappeared because MVK took him away, making their reunion all the more complicated for Edgeworth. Phoenix still sees him the way he did as children, and Edgeworth knows he’s anything but the same as the boy he was back then (or really, parts of him are still buried deep down but it will take a while before he’s ready to examine things further).

Whether you want to believe Phoenix and Miles had inklings of feelings stronger than friendship as children is up to your personal headcanon (I lean on the side of yes, because I’m a sucker for kid fluff and the story just gives this whole vibe of childhood best friends who got very close very fast and felt really strongly about each other, even if they were too young to understand/seek out romantic love - but they knew they really cared about each other a lot).

Phoenix seems as idealistic as ever to Edgeworth, and it’s too much to handle that Phoenix could still be trying to see Edgeworth as someone he doesn’t believe he is capable of being anymore - someone he hasn’t been for quite a long time.

I think Miles probably tried to hang on tightly to his memories of Phoenix (and to an extent, Larry) after his father died, because Phoenix was still out there somewhere. But eventually he had to push them down… bury his feelings because he couldn’t survive that way in the von Karma household. Feelings and relationships were only distractions.

Well… now Phoenix is back and largely responsible for this crisis of conscience that Edgeworth finds himself in. That’s the largest meaning behind the line.

But I don’t think it’s a stretch to still say, yes, the gay reading of it is not inaccurate either - just a smaller piece. Those feelings of nostalgia and caring about Phoenix are being stirred back up - he thought he had been able to successfully bury them, apparently not.

On top of everything else, his thoughts are going to be that he cannot handle dealing with feelings for Phoenix. He has not allowed himself to develop relationships with others beyond what is necessary for his job, and even his relationships with MVK and Franziska are not healthy by any standards. So yeah, some of that unease and uncertainty is about Phoenix specifically, not just what Phoenix has showed him, but also what Phoenix represents to him - a past that’s not only painful to remember, but also a time where he cared about and was close to Phoenix. But he’s not at all in the right headspace to try to deal with that, so he’s going to continue to try to pretend he’s not having these feelings.

I like to think the moment when Edgeworth really goes “oh shit I have feelings for him” comes later, at a point during Turnabout Goodbyes (I have my specific moment in mind - I actually did not even ship them hard by the “unnecessary feelings” line, it was more like haha silly gay lawyers that’s fun and later it became I depend emotionally on this homosexual ship)

Um anyways is that how most people also view this? Lol

Okay back to the fun reblogging for the celebrations.

[crimsonhydrangeavn]

I have several questions about your characters that I'm really excited to explore, especially because I'd love to draw these scenarios and learn more about them. However, if any of these questions make you uncomfortable or if there are just too many, please feel free to disregard them and only focus on the first one.

How would the love interests (LIs) react to a main character (MC) who has a childlike, playful side? Picture the MC enjoying activities like singing and dancing while preparing breakfast, engaging in pillow fights, playing hide and seek, or running around the house in a game of tag. How would each LI respond to these playful, light-hearted moments?

How would the LIs feel about an MC who is extremely romantic? Imagine an MC who regularly brings flowers, writes love poems, and makes declarations of love. Would the LIs react positively to such frequent displays of affection, or would it be overwhelming for some?

Example for this question: Suppose the MC is talking to Rita about someone they have feelings for. The MC speaks in a very affectionate, almost lovestruck way, showering this person with compliments and jokes. The MC then ends the conversation by saying, "And you know this person very well," revealing that they were talking about Rita the whole time. How would each LI react to this kind of romantic and playful revelation?

Final question: I imagine Garret has noticed the MC admiring his beautiful garden of crimson hydrangeas. If the MC asked for a bouquet, would Garret be willing to give them one? How would he approach this moment, and what might it mean to him?

Haha thank you so much for you interest in Crimson Hydrangea! I'd love to see any and all artwork/ fanwork that you might create in the future! It took be a little while to get through all of the questions, but I hope the wait was worth it!

How would the love interests (LIs) react to a main character (MC) who has a childlike, playful side? 

Garret would find your lighthearted and playful attitude adorable. They would probably indulge each and every one of your whims and do everything in their power to make sure you feel comfortable enough to continue being you.

Marcelo would have a lot of fun encouraging and joining in on your silly antics. He’d match your energy and surprise you with his own light hearted moments. 

Camilla would absolutely be your partner in crime. She’d not only join in, but up the stakes somehow. You want to sing and dance while making breakfast? Well get ready for an hour long karaoke session!

Rita would playfully tease you about your childish antics, but she would always reluctantly join in. However by the end of whatever activity you started, she would be having a fun time and giggling up a storm.

It would depend on Teagan’s mood. If they were in a bad/sulky mood you might have to push and poke them a little before they finally stopped sulking and joined in. However if they were neutral/ happy they would not only join in, but raise the stakes to several degrees.

How would the LIs feel about an MC who is extremely romantic?

Garret would absolutely eat it all up. He’s a pretty big romantic, so if you went out of your way to do something sweet/ romantic for him, you can bet he’d try to do something 10x more romantic for you.

Marcelo would be a little shy at first when it came towards the romantic gestures. Usually he’s the one doing the pursuing, and the fact that you’re going all out for him would fluster him a great deal. However once he gathered his bearings and got used to being in a committed relationship with you, he would make it a point to return the romantic gestures tenfold.

While Camilla would certainly appreciate the romance, she might feel slightly uncomfortable at first. Oddly enough, she’s far more comfortable with the sexual side of things than she is with romance. She’s not the most romantic person out there and it would be quite a transition for her, but she would work on becoming more romantic if that was something you wished for her. 

Rita is a secret romantic at heart. At first she wouldn’t be able to hide her surprise, or pleasure, at the romantic gestures. Once she got a little more used to it, she would actually make it a point to do something romantic for you every day, or several times a day. Your actions would give her courage to finally embrace her inner romantic.

Like Garret, Teagan would welcome your romance with open arms. They would gush about how wonderful you were and then try to do something even MORE romantic and grander for you. Unlike Garret, they wouldn’t know when to stop or when they were going too far, so they would need you to tell them when enough is enough and that more isn’t always better. 

Example for this question: Suppose the MC is talking to Rita about someone they have feelings for. The MC speaks in a very affectionate, almost lovestruck way, showering this person with compliments and jokes. The MC then ends the conversation by saying, "And you know this person very well," revealing that they were talking about Rita the whole time. How would each LI react to this kind of romantic and playful revelation?

Garret would somehow manage to keep a pleasant smile on his lips the entire time. However the warmth in their eyes would quickly disappear with something far colder and intimidating. However, he would quickly blink it away when you revealed that it was him you were talking about. Only then would you see a true affectionate smile grace his handsome features as he chuckled and reached out to ruffle your hair before telling them that the feeling’s mutual. Oh, and don’t expect him to admit that he was jealous, because he’ll absolutely play dumb. 

Marcelo would visibly deflate as you spoke about this mystery person. He’d quietly nod along and wrack his brain trying to figure out who you were describing. However once it was revealed that it was him, he’d be dumbstruck for a few moments. Eventually he would llet out a loud nervous laugh before lying and saying he knew it all along. After all, how could you not love someone as great as Marcelo the magnificent? Yet, despite his grandiose words he would immediately confirm whether or not you meant what you said.

Camilla would have a surprisingly good poker face the entire exchange. However when you revealed the truth of the mystery person, she would crack a big old grin and playfully push your arm in retaliation. She’d call you a jerk, but visibly be in a far better mood afterwards. 

Rita would quietly listen doing a stellar job of keeping her emotions and expectations in check. She might look a little thoughtful, but you wouldn’t really be able to see her emotions at first. After the reveal Rita would pause before turning the darkest shade of red imaginable, practically short circuiting at the revelation. Really? You have feelings for her of all people? It would take a little more convincing on your part before she would bashfully thank you.

Teagan would be in a FOUL foul mood the entire time you were gushing about this mystery person. You would visibly see them becoming more and more impatient as their mouth twisted into a scowl. However when it was revealed that it was them, you can bet that their expression would turn to one of shock. However once it sunk in they would begin laughing with relief and playfully lecturing you about how you should have started off by telling them it was them the entire time!

Final question: I imagine Garret has noticed the MC admiring his beautiful garden of crimson hydrangeas. If the MC asked for a bouquet, would Garret be willing to give them one? How would he approach this moment, and what might it mean to him?

So, there is a lot of symbolism in the Crimson Hydrangeas for Garret, some of which has already been revealed in game and a lot that hasn’t. I don’t want to disclose too much since it would delve into spoiler territory but I’ll do my best to answer this question the best I can. 

If you ask for a bouquet of Hydrangeas prior to knowing the full context of them, he would be amused and be more than happy to oblige. He’d meticulously pick the biggest and prettiest blooms before beautifully wrapping them in parchment paper and a beautiful black bow. He’d proudly present them to you, not thinking of much else aside from the beautiful smile on your face.

If you ask for a bouquet of Hydrangeas after knowing the full context of them, he would have a completely different reaction. He’d carefully watch your reaction to see if you were being genuine. Once he saw that you were, he’d ask a few more questions before finally agreeing to it. Unlike the first time around, he would be a bit more self conscious, thoughtful, and considerate when fulfilling the task. He would feel a lot more exposed and vulnerable because you’d know the full significance of the crimson hydrangeas and what they truly mean to him.

[nrilliree]

All the "Aemond is so sexy when he is burning the Riverlands" (just for the fun of it cuz he dgaf about his family) and "Aemond burns the Riverlands by day and and spends his nights in the arms of his milf paramour by night" stuff makes me internally cringe.

To start with, Aemond commiting war crimes just because he "wants to" sounds like a lame ass cartoon villain. Actually, even making Aemond extremely loyal to Aegon and his cause would make him a lil more complex character. Also, showing him as a decent uncle, emotionally invested in his nephews' upbringing and teaching them all Targ nonsense about Valyrian supremacy and sacred rule of male primogeniture would add to his depth. It could be a really interesting way of showing us how dutiful Aemond is (as the self-proclaimed " Green Alpha Dragon", he wants to become a father figure to Aegon's kids while their bio dad is busy drinking himself silly) . I don't wanna say Aemond's a good person, but he *could* be a good uncle and emotional bond with his nephews may make his thirst for revenge more understandable. Maybe he could even feel remorse, since it was his recklessness that lead to Jaehearys' death? I think seeing Aemond interact with the twins could be way more interesting than his sex scenes 🤮.

Also, wtf is going on with romantizing Aemond's "relationship" with Alys? As his prize of honour, literally an object, she was not in a position to consent!

In my opinion, everything that happened in the Riverlands resulted not from the "duty and honor" of this "good son who devoted his life to philosophy and history, and would be a better king", but simply from the fact that Aemond was carried away by revenge and a sense of humiliation. First he lost KL because he was outsmarted, then he lost Harrenhal, he didn't win a single battle (because he didn't even take part in it), and he was probably manipulated by Alys. I always interpreted their account in the book as something similar to Mirri Maz Duur's behavior. Aemond came to Harrenhal, sentenced the entire Strong family to death (even the old people and children, to whom Alys might have had some attachment since she was a wet nurse), and then took Alys as a "war prize". TG like to remind everyone that "sharply questioned" means "torture", but they forget that "war prize" means "I will take you to bed, even if I have to rape you". Alys may have been a witch, or maybe she was just a herbalist and pretended well, but then she not only fooled Aemond, but gave him bad advice all along. She was the one who convinced him not to join Criston (and he died), not to join Daeron, not to go to KL, and then she sent him straight to meet Daemon, convincing him that he could see the future. And what, seeing it, wouldn't she tell Aemond that he would die there? Either she knew it and lied to him, or she faked it and gave him false self-confidence so that he would die. In my interpretation, this is not a love story, but the revenge of a raped, talented manipulator.

[deathofpeaceofmiiind]

high infidelity | twelve

The rest of the world was black and white, but we were in screaming colour *Noah’s POV* I woke up the next morning pretty early, I had a slight headache from all the beers I had last night but it was manageable. Ellie was still sleeping but I couldn’t help but admire her before I got up. Yesterday was the perfect day and I wondered how we’d ever top it, but I’m sure Ellie had some ideas up her sleeve. She gave me a sense of adventure and excitement I haven’t had for something outside of my music in so long. She was such a breath of fresh air. After I realized I had been staring at her for ten minutes zoning in and out I decided to get dressed and go find us some coffee. I walked outside and it was already so busy out, but I wasn’t that surprised considering I’m used to LA. I had my AirPods in listening to a podcast when my phone rang, it was Matt FaceTiming me.

“Hey lover boy.” Matt serenades me as I answer. I looked down at my phone and he was sitting on our tour bus, not even looking at his phone and I could hear Call of Duty being played in the background, quite loudly too. “Thanks for dropping a bomb on us and ghosting.” “What bomb?” I chuckled as I saw a Starbucks down the road. I could’ve easily googled what was around me but I wanted to explore this city. Vancouver was really growing on me… “That photo of you and El!” He yells at me before dying in his game. I never had the heart to tell him he was terrible at video games, but I feel like someone needs to tell him before he gives himself a stroke. “Sorry about that, we got…busy” I replied as I licked my lips, getting flashbacks of what happened last night and how I wanted her moans saved as a voice note.  “You little slut.” “Shut up.” I felt myself blush. Ellie and I never slept together last night but after I had my fun with her, we took a small break and ended up falling asleep. Not to stroke my own ego, but I was pretty damn proud of myself. I’ve never had a girl react to my touch so authentically before, most of them would put on a show, but not her. “Dude, I think I’m falling in love with her.” “Wait are you serious?” Matts eyes darted to the screen, not caring that his game was still on. To be honest, I don’t think it would make a difference if he played or stood still. “Yeah” I replied softly. I pulled into an alleyway so I could finish talking to him before I went inside. “I don’t know man. This girl just sees right through my persona and sees me for who I really am. I’ve never experienced this much emotion over a girl before and it’s weird.” “Wow I didn’t know you were down that bad man.” Matt said as his eyes darted back and forth. He cursed under his breath as his controller vibrated even more and he threw it onto the couch, giving me his undivided attention. “I don’t blame you though, she’s so hot.” “Dude she’s so hot I would commit any crime she told me to do.” I laughed, there was no denying what a fucking babe she was. Every time I think about that classic red lip she wore the first night, I wanted her to leave it smeared on other parts of me besides my face. “She could run me over with her car and I’d say thanks.” “I’m starting to think you like her or something.” I joked as Matt’s face went bright red. “Nah man, she’s all yours.” He half laughed as he reached over to grab his controller. “Just remember she’s going through a lot so don’t scare her off, she’s gonna need your support. I’d hate to see you fuck this up again.” “I’ll try my best” I partially lied cause all I wanted to do was profess my love to her at our next show but that would make her run for sure. “It seems like we’re on the same page right now but I know she needs to do what’s best for her and her son.” “Wait…She’s a MILF?” “Goodbye Matthew.” I chuckled as I hung up the call. It amazes me how Matt can go from being serious to a high school kid in a flash. I found myself circling back to some of his comments about Ellie but I shrugged it off. I’m sure he was just joking.

[rubberduckyrye]

you seem kind of callous...I don't know the whole story but friends are supposed to help each other

Hey anon. Anon.

You’re fucking right—you don’t know the whole story. And to be frank, I’m suspicious of this ask because who in their right might would send this to me after I made my posts.

Anyway.

Let me be clear.

This man trauma dumped on me and a friend constantly. He’s always talking about how awful life is and making suicidal comments. I keep telling him to get a therapist but he ignores me because of his own damn pride/learned helplessness. But despite despising therapists, he’s using me and my friend as free therapists to vent to—which is why I kept telling him to get professional help because this man desperately needs it.

He did not listen.

It came to a head over the weekend, where we had an argument where I made it very clear that the words he says makes us (me and my friend) constantly worry about his safety, how we aren’t trained professionals, ectect. He got all pissy because I told him that him apologizing for hating therapists felt insincere when he didn’t plan on changing that behavior, he said I was calling him a liar, and I had to leave the group chat after he reacted poorly to me finally caving and sending him a CBT workbook so he could “help himself.”

After that, he DMs me, we argue more, and we come to some sort of agreement where I stated some things needed to fucking change and he agreed. Great!

Except not great.

This man had been emotionally manipulating me by being nice to me in my personal DMs, but he was being vile about me in DMs with my friend. He insisted me telling him to get a therapist every time he trauma dumped on us was harassment, he kept weirdly misgendering me when referring to me from six or seven years ago (which, fun fact—I was Agender then too, so there’s no fucking excuse!) (Also context here: we all met in a RP, I drifted off and we stopped speaking six-seven years ago, only to reconnect recently), said that I was like his Ex (not as in I reminded him of an ex, no—that I was like an ex of his), and finally, he called me abusive because I committed the horrible crime of drifting away from him and my other friend as a friend and never DMed him back and he waited like the ~sad little puppy in the gutter-victim of my crime~ for seven years.

IN WHICH.

If this man really was so stuck on me and missed me, kinda weird how he had my email this whole fucking time and didn’t try to reach out these past six or seven years! Kind of weird for someone who blames me for him developing abandonment issues to not reach out in that span of time, don’t you think? That’s how we reconnected in the first place—I posted in the old RP ooc forum, and he scrambled to get into contact with me because I made a nostalgic post about being a stupid kid. He emailed me just to get my attention!

Anyway.

He said all of these sentiments to my friend AFTER we had our discussion. So he was sweet talking to me and shit talking about me to my friend, and called me abusive because I dared to just, drift away from him. He had a grudge against me. One that I knew he was going to hover over my damn head—especially since things “seemed fine” after the conversation. Had my friend not told me about what he said behind my back? Fuck. I’d be ignorant to how horrible of a guy he had become.

So I cut him off. I knew he wasn’t going to help himself and he was just going to, albeit unintentionally so, emotionally abuse me. And you know what he did after I did that?

He picked a fucking fight with my friend.

He took his hurt and upset out on her, whined the tragic woes of “Oh, I thought everything was fine now, Rye lied to me!” Despite literally calling me abusive in DMs with my friend earlier. I didn’t mention to him that my friend told me what he said, because I wanted to avoid him giving her his damn wrath—but it didn’t matter. They fought. And that’s where we are right now.

Sorry that I don’t want to be friends with someone who thinks of me as an abuser because I drifted away from him as a friend. Fuck, we weren’t even that close—and my friends have expressed concern over how weirdly obsessed he is with me.

But yes. You ARE supposed to help your friends, it’s not a bad thing to occasionally need to vent and cry and be held. However, he was not treating us like friends—he was treating us like free therapists who he could beat up emotionally and keep around because if we left, what if he hurt himself? Then when I came into the picture with my New Yorker “I take no shit” attitude, he didn’t like that, and got pissy because I refused to coddle him anymore.

You can lead a horse to water, but you can’t make it drink.

You can try to help a friend, but if they don’t want to help themselves, then they’re just making you watch as they spiral down and get worse.

And once again I state: If you fucking play with Fire, You are Going to get Burned.

My feelings of genuine concern for this man were played with like a fiddle. Now that I know, he has to face the fire.

And anon, don’t send this shit to other people. It’s fucking rude at best, and comes off as victim blaming at worst.

So yeah. Fuck off with this shit.

[weer02]

25. Ramble about anything, everything you are dying to tell the world of your WIP.

Sorry you had to wait so long for me to answer your ask, but I held off answering it until I'd have chapter 20 posted. It's the part of my WIP I'd like to ramble about 'cause I feel like quite a lot has happened in there. It will make more sense after reading the chapter, sooo I'd recommend reading the chapter first (it's posted now) then this post!

Max&Nathan doing jigsaw puzzle on the visits

I'm gonna start with a fun one, not really important to the plot . I wondered about the things they can do at the visits, have something that would help them bond as friends. I went for jigsaw puzzle, inspired by my own inexplicable need to assemble a jigsaw puzzle (which I did btw, bought myself a 1000 piece jigsaw puzzle and assembled it alone within like a week haha). While I was doing the puzzle, I thought about the size, what kind of assembling strategies they'd have. Yeah, that starts to sound like "method writing" 😂

Nathan getting worried about Max's emotional state

Ok, I'm gonna ramble a lot about it, 'cause that's one of my fav things in this chapter,! I love to write nice and sweet scenes with them after so many angsty scenes! One thing that I love about my very slow build is how they slowly warm up to each other, start to trust themselves more to share certain stuff, how they begin to notice odd behavior in each other.

Max being quiet on the visits is something alarming, because she was always rambling about random stuff, so he asks her to tell him about how is she. He's the first one to know about what's bothering her lately, what makes it more easy for her is that he is/was dealing with more severe emotional issues than her, so she assumes he'll understand + won't judge her. And what she assumes turns out to be true.

Surprise, now it's Nathan who's helping Max! How the tables had turned! Yeah... at some point of writing this fic, I think I was writing chapter 6? I figured out that Max will develop some kind of mental issues because of the trauma she went through. One of the tropes? in the caulscott I'm writing is that they both somehow bond over their issues, and the help part (that in many caulscott fics is often one sided) is reciprocated here. It's gonna be explored more in further chapters!

The other patient's breakdown

Something that I came up with to show more of the hospital environment; that it's a relatively calm space for Max and Nathan to form their friendship, but there are also moments when something unnerving can happen, because it's still a psychiatric hospital. It's also for the plot's sake, the breakdown adds some action to a scene, but also serves as a some kind of a parallel to Nathan's situation, in his group therapy he has people who committed crimes like him; and his line "Yes, I did fucked up shit and that's why I'm locked up  here with other people who also did fucked up shit. I don't know why are you so shocked." is a great summary to what I was trying to achieve by introducing that OC (? idk if an episodic character counts as oc)

The Nightmare

I decided to do more "Nigtmare Sequences" because of the feedback I've got for it (and because of one of your reviews Kris @kpchrs :DD)

-For the hallway part I have to say that I drew some inspiration for the setting from my interest in dreamcore/liminal spaces -For the second part with flashes were inspired by the nightmare sequence from the original game, the visit scene floating in the void by the Max&Chloe "memory lane" -The part that happens after the "blood red flash", the "worst outcome of that day/alternate universe glimpse" is actually an angsty thought I had once, that "what if things in chapter 1 went not in favor of our protagonist(s)", "What if Jefferson's plan worked?". That's just plain angst(tm) for all the readers from me :")

I really enjoy considering "what if" scenarios, and because LiS' universe heavily connected time travel/parallel worlds, I took the opportunity.

But is it just a nightmare and her brain fearing the worst or a glimpse of an alternate universe? "Our" Max thinks she got to see a glimpse of another universe, mostly because of her alter-ego's implication, but what's the truth is up to the reader's interpretation. I had so much fun writing in the dreamlike, nightmarish setting, and I'm not done with it yet!

The therapy session

An attempt of a rational explanation of Max's powers, one of things that can be found in one of my first outlines. It was supposed to go like she went through multiple therapists, and from the last one she'll hear she made up the powers to cope with a traumatic experience. I think it's a plausible explanation of her powers, especially for like a realistic approach. It's not the typical "character wakes up and realizes everything (supernatural) that happened was a dream" (though "Staying Vertical" by midnight_neverland on AO3 does it SO well), but something in between. I'll see where that will go in my fic 'cause I have a few ideas how to wrap up the Max's powers part, even though it's not a main focus of this fic. But some kind of explanation about why Max had got her powers is something I wish was more explored in the game.

Speaking of the therapist scene, there's a funny thing in context of my new obsession, THG. I named Max's therapist Dr. Collins, because that was what the name generator came up with, before I even started watching THG and got into it. The authors' name is Collins too. I'm gonna leave it like that 'cause I love a funny coincidence 😂

Oh, so many things happened in this chapter but at the same time I feel like nothing happened at all 😩 I sometimes feel like going in circles with this fic, even though I'm satisfied with my outline and I'm following that outline! Ugh, writing struggles once again! As of right now I have around 10 more chaps planned so the fic would have a nice number of 30 chapters. No one knows what will be left of these plans, 'cause in the original it was supposed to be 20 chapters 🥲

For anyone that stayed up until now, thanks for reading!💖💖

[cherryeoo]

Between Shadows and Light Ch 1

Being evil was no easy task, but for Mirae, it was a way of life—a way of life she cherished and wouldn't trade for anything. Mirae was what people called a Gumiho, or a nine-tailed fox, though the name varied across cultures. To most, she was a mythical creature, a being of lore, only existing in stories. But what they didn't know was that her kind still existed, though their numbers had dwindled over the years. Mirae's kind could fall in love, but doing so meant becoming the very thing they hunted: humans. Thankfully, Mirae had never let that happen... yet.

Mirae had always been something of an outcast, but she did have a family. Well, they weren't really her family, but they had taken her in when she was just a child. They found her wandering the streets after she had preyed upon a man who was out for "a little fun." She wasn't one to target the innocent; she had a code. She only hunted those who had wronged others or committed crimes.

In Mirae's world, the lines between good and evil weren't drawn by birth, but by choice. Most creatures like her were born human, chosen at random to become something else. But a rare few were born pure—what they called Royals or Pure Bloods. These beings, rulers of her kind, were fallen angels with a mix of both good and dark qualities. It was they who accepted Mirae as one of their own and brought her into their fold.

Luhan, the eldest, was the embodiment of lust in their family. He was the only Pure Blood among them, but he had run away from home at a young age, unwilling to live the life of royalty. His parents had searched for him relentlessly but eventually gave up, letting him live his own way. He was an instigator, always stirring up trouble. Short-tempered and slow to trust, Luhan didn't always play by the rules. But he loved his family fiercely, protecting them at all costs. He was the one who found Mirae and took her in—she owed him everything.

Chen, who represented greed, was discovered by Luhan in an alley, lost and confused. Chen was a prankster, always up to mischief, and a thief at heart. His greed knew no bounds—he took whatever he could, whether it was material things or lives. He had a cruel habit of torturing his prey before trapping their souls in jars, never letting them pass on to heaven or hell. He called it Purgatory.

Yixing, also known as Lay, embodied envy. He had been desperate to train under Luhan when they first met, refusing to stop pestering him until Luhan agreed. Now, he was one of the best fighters among them, but his envy often led him into conflict, especially with Chen. He constantly longed for things he didn't have, and when jealousy took over, it would drive him into a violent frenzy, believing that killing would somehow make up for his perceived shortcomings.

Baekhyun represented pride, and he was the embodiment of arrogance. He could never admit when he was wrong, convinced that he was always right. His pride often made him difficult to deal with, especially since he would never apologize for his actions. Despite his cockiness, Baekhyun was still loyal to the family and, to them, that was enough.

Kyungsoo, or D.O., represented wrath. His temper was legendary—when he lost control, it was as if a storm unleashed inside him. He had a dangerous, violent side that led him to tear apart everything in his path, including his own family. He once attacked Chen so severely that everyone thought Chen might not survive. Even now, Kyungsoo carried the guilt of what he had done, and though Chen forgave him, there was an unspoken distance between them.

Chanyeol, the embodiment of deceit, was a smooth talker and a master manipulator. He could convince anyone to do anything, and for a while, he used his charm to deceive and trick others. It wasn't until Luhan and the rest of the family got to know him that they saw through his lies, and he eventually stopped trying to manipulate them. But Chanyeol still had the ability to trick almost anyone—though his true loyalty was to his family.

Their family was dysfunctional, to say the least. They fought, bickered, and argued, but no matter what, they always had each other's backs. Family was family, and nothing would ever change that. Even in their chaos, they had a bond stronger than anything.

But unbeknownst to them, their family was about to grow.

Mirae's best friend was an unlikely and dangerous companion. Fei, an angel, was the opposite of everything Mirae had known, yet they had formed an inseparable bond. Their friendship had begun by chance. One day, Mirae had gone out for a stroll, looking to cause some mischief, when she spotted Fei, frantically washing her hands in a creek. Fei was clearly in distress, scrubbing her hands with increasing desperation. Mirae watched her for a moment, a flicker of pity stirring inside her—something she had never felt before.

Mirae had originally planned to attack the girl, but something about Fei made her change her mind. She approached the angel, curious, and asked, "What's wrong?"

Fei's tear-streaked face startled Mirae as she looked into the angel's eyes, filled with raw pain. "He's dead! And I killed him!" Fei screamed, her voice breaking. Fresh tears flooded her cheeks as she held out her hands, showing Mirae the blood staining her skin.

Mirae was taken aback. Death, killing—it was something Mirae had always known. It was part of who she was. But this... this girl in front of her was something entirely different. She was pure—an angel. Mirae knelt beside Fei, placing a hand on her trembling shoulder. "Who's dead?" she asked, her voice soft.

Fei pointed behind Mirae at the lifeless body. Mirae turned around, seeing a man lying on the ground with an arrow protruding from his bloody chest. When she turned back, she gently hugged Fei, who had started crying. Mirae whispered comforting words while stroking the girl's long, dark brown hair. Eventually, Fei went silent and limp in Mirae's arms. Mirae, fearing she was hurt, pulled away and checked on her, only to find that Fei had simply fallen asleep.

Determined to help Fei, Mirae decided to take her home to rest, knowing it was risky but not caring. She was sure she'd convince the others to leave the girl alone. After some time, Mirae successfully persuaded the guys that Fei meant no harm, and they reluctantly agreed. Sympathy was something new to the group, but Mirae appreciated it. She tucked Fei into the spare bed in her room and set out clothes for her to change into. Once Mirae had gotten ready for bed, she crawled into her own and quickly fell asleep.

Weeks later, as Mirae continued to care for Fei, she learned more about her mysterious companion. One morning, a couple of weeks after their first meeting in the woods, Fei was sitting in the backyard with Mirae when a sharp pain pierced her back between her shoulder blades. Crying out in agony, Fei collapsed into Mirae's arms, unable to respond to her frantic questions. The pain became unbearable, and after a tense moment, pure white wings shot out from Fei's back, releasing the tension and pain.

Mirae was taken aback, as were the other guys who had come outside to see what was happening. They stared at Fei in disbelief, while she sighed in relief, sitting up and meeting their shocked gazes. Fear washed over Fei, her eyes pleading for understanding, and Mirae stepped forward, placing her hand on Fei's before transforming into a fox. Fei stared, wide-eyed, as the medium-sized white fox sat beside her, its paw gently resting on the same spot where Mirae had been.

Once Mirae reverted to her human form, she reassured Fei, explaining who she was and who the others were. She told Fei that neither she nor the guys would harm her. However, Luhan remained unconvinced. He wanted Fei gone, but the others defended her, and after a tense standoff, he reluctantly agreed, though he made it clear he wanted nothing to do with her. This marked a turning point in their relationship.

"What's your name?" Mirae asked softly, introducing herself first. "I'm Mirae, and these are the guys: Baekhyun, Chen, Chanyeol, Yixing, Kyungsoo, and Luhan."

"Fei," the girl whispered.

Luhan, however, was furious. "Don't tell her our names!" he yelled, stepping forward. "She could return to her kind, reveal where we are, and get us killed!"

"But Luhan, we trust her. We can feel that she's different," Mirae said, trying to calm him down.

"I'm not changing my mind," Luhan snapped, his anger palpable. "I don't ever want to see her again."

"Dude, that's harsh!" Chanyeol interjected. "I know she's an angel, but Mirae's right. She's not like the others. Give her a chance!"

Luhan's gaze hardened as he shot back, "SHUT UP! Just be glad I'm allowing her to live!" With that, he stormed off, slamming the door behind him, the force of it shaking the walls.

The others exchanged glances, shocked by Luhan's outburst. Mirae sighed and looked back at Fei, whose fear was evident. A few tears slipped down her cheeks, and Mirae's heart ached for her.

"Maybe I should leave. I'm clearly not wanted here," Fei said, her voice barely above a whisper. "I'm the enemy."

Mirae quickly steadied the exhausted girl as she attempted to stand. "Don't say that," she said gently. "You're safe here."

Baekhyun stepped forward, wrapping his arm around Fei's wrist. "Don't worry," he said softly. "No one here is going to hurt you."

Fei couldn't finish her sentence before she collapsed, unconscious from exhaustion. Baekhyun caught her and carried her upstairs, where they laid her down in Mirae's room, deciding that it would be best for Fei to be near another girl.

After a few hours, Mirae sat with the others in the living room, reflecting on the situation. "Do you really think she killed that man?" Kyungsoo asked, his concern obvious.

"I don't know," Baekhyun replied, "but we'll ask her when she's ready to talk."

As they headed to bed, Mirae silently entered her room, checking on Fei. The girl was still sleeping, peaceful for the moment, but Mirae knew that she would need to address the events soon. Laying in her own bed, Mirae glanced over at Fei, then turned her gaze out the window, drifting into a deep sleep.

But in the middle of the night, Mirae was awoken by loud shouting. Her heart raced as she saw Fei, wide-eyed and holding a knife. The others had gathered in the living room, trying to calm her down.

"Please, Fei, drop the knife," Yixing said, raising his hands in a peaceful gesture.

Fei's eyes were frantic, and Mirae slowly approached. "It's okay," she said softly. "I promise no one will hurt you."

Fei flinched at Mirae's voice, gripping the knife tighter. She began swinging it wildly, and Mirae was struck across the arm, blood flowing from the wound. Before anyone could react, Luhan rushed forward, grabbing Fei and restraining her with surprising strength. He held her tightly, his body tense with effort.

"Let me go!" Fei screamed, struggling against him.

"Shut up! I'm stopping you from hurting anyone!" Luhan shouted, his voice full of frustration.

Fei glared at him. "Why do you care if I get hurt? You hate me!"

Luhan's grip tightened, but in a moment of distraction, Fei broke free, tripping on Luhan's foot and falling to the ground. Her hand landed on the knife, cutting her palm. She didn't react to the pain, her attention fixated on the blood pooling around her hand.

Luhan, though stern, was not unaffected by what had just happened. He had begun to care for Fei more than he was willing to admit. His actions, however harsh, were meant to protect her—though he couldn't let anyone know that just yet.

"See?" Luhan said, his voice dripping with annoyance. "This is why I restrained you. Hopefully, this fit is over so we can all get some sleep."

With that, he stormed off to his room, leaving a stunned silence in his wake. The others, still reeling from the chaos, made sure Mirae was tended to, her wound cleaned and bandaged.

Kyungsoo knelt beside Fei, gently lifting her wounded hand. "We need to take care of that," he said softly. "Are you okay?"

Fei glanced at her hand, the pain now fully registering. She nodded silently as Kyungsoo helped her to her feet. Leaning on him for support, she allowed him to guide her back to Mirae's room. He retrieved the first aid kit from the bathroom and carefully began to clean and stitch her palm. Though Fei could have numbed the pain, she chose not to—feeling it was a punishment for what she had done to Mirae and the others. She winced as he worked, the pain sharp but bearable, trying not to make a sound.

"I'm sorry... to all of you. I didn't mean to. I hope Mirae's okay," she whispered, pulling her injured hand back into her lap, ashamed.

"It's alright," Kyungsoo reassured her with a gentle smile as he finished bandaging her hand. "No one's angry, and Mirae will be just fine. Yixing is taking care of her right now."

Fei's eyes flickered with concern. "But what about Luhan?"

Kyungsoo's smile faded a little. "Don't worry about him. He's been a little more... relaxed. Maybe he's just tired. But still, I'd avoid him for now."

Fei nodded, feeling a slight sense of relief. She watched him finish cleaning up, then lay down on the bed, pulling the covers up to her chin. As the room grew quiet, she heard the door creak open. Not bothering to turn her head, she listened as someone tiptoed around and climbed into the bed opposite hers. The soft tick of the clock on the dresser was the only sound in the room as Fei stared at the ceiling, her heart still heavy with guilt. Tears began to form again, blurring her vision, and before she could stop them, they rolled down her cheeks. She quickly wiped them away, but more fell in their place.

"Are you okay, Fei?" a soft voice called from the other side of the room.

Fei sniffled, blinking rapidly to clear her eyes. "I'm fine. I'm sorry."

"There's no need to apologize. I'm okay, and Kyungsoo told me what happened," Mirae said quietly from the other side.

"I'm sorry," Fei repeated, her voice barely a whisper before exhaustion overtook her, and she drifted into sleep.

Mirae sighed softly, realizing that Fei had already fallen asleep. "There's no need to apologize to family, Fei," she murmured, rolling over carefully so as not to hurt her arm. She closed her eyes, letting sleep take over.

The next morning, Mirae woke up at her usual time for their hunting trip with the guys. She dressed quickly, making sure not to disturb Fei, then rushed downstairs to join the others. Once everyone was ready, they set off for their usual hunting ground. Today's pickings were slim, but they quickly identified their targets. Mirae, sensing a man who was a drug addict and abuser of his girlfriend, decided to follow him.

As she trailed behind him, the man turned briefly but didn't notice her, continuing on his way. He stopped at the end of a dark alley, distracted by his phone. Mirae knew this was her moment. She crept up behind him, pretending to be lost. When she tapped him on the shoulder, he turned around with a smirk, his eyes immediately scanning her body.

"Can you help me? I'm lost, and my phone's dead," Mirae said, batting her lashes and playing the helpless role.

The man grinned. "Sure, sweetheart. Where do you need to go? I can take you there."

"That would be great, thanks," Mirae replied, following him back down the alley.

As soon as he turned his back, Mirae grabbed a piece of wood from the ground and struck him over the head, knocking him to the ground. He groaned in pain but tried to rise, shock in his eyes. Mirae smiled cruelly and leaned in close, her face inches from his. Before he could react, she grabbed his head, twisting it sharply. A sickening snap echoed through the alley as his neck broke, and his body fell lifeless to the ground. She made sure to stage the scene as a drug deal gone wrong before walking away to meet the others.

As she approached the group, she could hear them bickering about who had the best kill. It was a routine they'd had for months, always ending with Mirae as the victor. She missed when Luhan used to hunt with them, but for some reason, he'd been hunting alone lately.

"You're really a vamp, Mirae. Well done," Baekhyun teased, nudging her with a grin.

"Yeah, no guy can resist your charm," Chen chimed in, smirking.

Mirae laughed along, shaking her head as they continued to joke about her allure and how every guy seemed to fall for her, whether she wanted them to or not. She glanced up at the sky as the sun began to rise, filling the sky with shades of pink, purple, and blue. Watching the sunrise had always been something she loved, and she dreamed of one day sharing it with someone she cared about. But she knew, deep down, that day might never come.

"Alright, guys, let's head home," she said, pushing herself to her feet.

After a short walk back to the house, Mirae was surprised to find Fei's bed empty. A wave of worry hit her, and she immediately began searching the house. When she couldn't find Fei inside, she stepped outside and saw her sitting on the tree swing, her feet slowly pushing off the ground as she watched the sunrise.

Mirae smiled softly, heading back inside to let Fei have her moment. Fei stayed there until the sky was fully lit, watching the birds fly across the horizon. As she heard footsteps approaching, she turned to see Chanyeol walking toward her, a smile on his face as he joined her in silence, both of them observing the peaceful scene.

"Are you hungry? Breakfast is ready," Chanyeol asked after a few moments.

Fei nodded silently, standing up and following him inside. The smell of freshly cooked food—sausage, eggs, and pancakes—filled the air as they entered the kitchen. Fei grabbed a plate and joined the others at the table, but there was no seat for her with the group. She felt like an outsider despite their reassurances, so she chose to sit at the kitchen island alone.

She had always felt like an outcast, even among her own kind. Her family, though close, had always been different from the others. Her family consisted of six other angels: Xiumin, Jongin (Kai), Sehun, Suho, Kris, and Tao. They had grown up separately but had always felt like outsiders, different from the other angels. Together, they had decided to live as a family, so they wouldn't feel so alone. They had powers—powers that were considered unnatural, even demonic—making them even more isolated. Fei was grateful for her family, but she couldn't help but feel the weight of being different, always standing apart from everyone else.

Xiumin could freeze things, Jongin had the power to teleport, Sehun controlled the wind, Suho could manipulate water, Kris could fly (which was rare among angels), and Tao had the extraordinary ability to stop time. Fei, on the other hand, had the gift of hearing people's thoughts—especially their deepest, darkest ones—and could communicate mentally. Though she only used this power with the guys, at first, it had felt more like a curse than a blessing. It was uncontrollable, and she would hear everything, whether she wanted to or not. Over time, she learned how to filter the thoughts that came into her mind, but sometimes, their intensity made it impossible to shut them out. She just wished she could tell them that she was safe.

Fei poked at her eggs with a fork, deep in thought. She missed the guys terribly—Xiumin, Jongin, Sehun, Suho, Kris, Tao—but felt torn. She couldn't stay here forever, but how would she even get back to them? She didn't know where she was, or how to go home. She was sure she wasn't in danger here, but she also sensed she was being heavily guarded. The feeling of being trapped made her heart heavy.

Finishing her plate of food and drinking her juice, Fei was lost in her thoughts when a hand landed gently on her shoulder. She looked up and found Mirae smiling down at her.

"Why didn't you sit with us? We would've made room for you," Mirae asked, sitting beside her.

Fei shook her head slightly. "I didn't want to intrude. I don't belong here... I'm an angel, remember?"

Mirae's smile softened, and she placed a hand on Fei's. "Fei, you do belong here. You're a guest and a friend, and we all care about you. Don't let that label make you feel out of place. Besides, don't you think our kind could coexist? I believe we can, and we're proof that it's possible."

Fei sighed, her gaze dropping. "I've always wondered that too. But it always feels like it's either light or dark, good or bad. Why can't there be a gray area where we can all exist together?"

Mirae tilted her head, thoughtful. "I understand. I do. But remember that things are changing, slowly but surely. Look at Luhan. He could have killed you that night, but he didn't. He protected all of us, even you. Maybe, just maybe, there's hope for us all."

Mirae gave Fei a quick hug and then walked back to the dining room to clear her dishes, leaving Fei to her thoughts.

Fei closed her eyes, concentrating. She connected to Xiumin's mind and sent a quick message: I'm safe here. I'll find my way back to you all soon. Please don't worry. A few moments later, she felt Xiumin's presence and heard his reply: We miss you, and we're glad you're safe. Wherever you are, be careful. We'll see you soon.

Fei let out a small breath and disconnected. She had no answers for where she was or how to return, but at least the guys knew she was okay. That was a start.

The rest of the day passed slowly for Fei. She spent her time reading or watching TV in her room, occasionally sitting outside, watching the others go about their lives. Though she wanted to join in, she still felt like an outsider. Mirae had been gone all day, and Fei hadn't felt as included without her. But it was nearing the evening, and Fei knew it was time to talk to Mirae.

"Mirae, can I talk to you?" Fei asked, catching Mirae as she was cleaning the room.

"Of course," Mirae answered, looking up from her task.

Fei hesitated for a moment before speaking. "I really appreciate everything you and the others have done for me... but I miss my family. I think it's time for me to go back home."

Mirae paused, sadness flashing across her face. "I knew this day would come," she said softly. "You can go, but promise me you'll stay in touch, okay?"

Fei nodded and quickly scribbled her phone number down on a scrap of paper, handing it to Mirae. "I'll miss you," she whispered.

"I'll miss you too," Mirae said, her voice thick with emotion. "Let's meet in the woods, where we found you. Every evening, okay?"

"Deal," Fei replied, smiling faintly.

Later that night, the two girls stayed up talking, watching movies, and enjoying each other's company. It was a rare moment of peace in a world that was always complicated. Fei was grateful for Mirae's friendship, and as Mirae finally fell asleep, Fei took the chance to write a thank you note. After folding it, she tucked it under one of the books on Mirae's bedside table.

Fei climbed into bed and pulled the blankets up to her chin. As she closed her eyes, she drifted into a peaceful sleep, knowing it was time to say goodbye.

The next morning, Fei awoke early. She quietly gathered her things, scribbling a quick note for the others, explaining why she had to leave. After placing the note on Mirae's bedside table, she slipped out of the house without a sound. The front door creaked softly as she stepped outside and walked down the stairs, her heart heavy with the knowledge that this was the last time she would be here.

Once outside, she quickly made her way home, her mind focused on returning to the people who truly knew her.

Hours later, Mirae woke up to the empty bed beside her. Her heart sank as she remembered their conversation. She sighed, feeling the weight of Fei's departure. After showering and getting dressed, Mirae found the note that Fei had left. She read it slowly, her eyes brimming with tears. Once finished, she carefully folded it, wiping away the tears that had formed.

When Mirae entered the kitchen, the guys greeted her with smiles and good mornings. Yixing noticed the sadness in her eyes and asked where Fei was. Mirae slid the note across the table, and Yixing quickly scanned its contents. His expression changed to one of disbelief.

"What? She left already?" Yixing said, his voice a mix of surprise and sadness.

"Yeah," Mirae replied quietly, "She said she'd be back, but not now. It was time for her to go home."

One by one, the others read the note, and a somber mood fell over the room. Fei would be missed by all of them.

Mirae didn't say anything about meeting Fei that evening. Instead, she quietly exited the kitchen, needing some space. She walked outside to find some solitude, but to her surprise, Luhan was already sitting at the table, staring at the horizon.

Mirae took a seat at the other end of the table, away from him, her thoughts clouded. He'd likely be relieved that Fei was gone, and she didn't want to engage with him just yet. The two of them sat in silence, watching the sun rise.

Luhan broke the silence. "So she's finally gone. I know you all miss her, but she never belonged here with us. It's good she's with her own kind," he said coolly.

Mirae clenched her fists, her anger rising. "Shut up! Just because you didn't like her doesn't mean we didn't! I finally found someone my age, someone I could be friends with, and you pushed her away!" she snapped, slamming her fist onto the table.

Luhan stood, his frustration boiling over. "I didn't want you to befriend an angel! They're not like us, they're our enemies! You can't see that?" he yelled, his grip tightening on her arms as he shook her.

Mirae struggled to free herself, her voice cracking. "Let go of me!" Tears streamed down her face as she wrenched herself free, rushing into the house.

Slamming the door behind her, she ran up to her room, grabbed her things, and fled the house without looking back. She ran all the way to the woods, where she collapsed, crying into the damp earth.

Mirae spent a long time crying before sitting up, wiping her face, and leaning against a tree. She felt drained, her heart heavy with the words that had been exchanged.

She wasn't sure what to do, but she knew she needed Fei. She needed her friend now more than ever.

[bravewolfvesperia]

Even right now this still felt like the Flynn he knew. There were definitely shades of change in him, but Yuri understood. If this had been reversed, he would have changed from it too. From seeing that... happen to Flynn. Every day, especially since he became a transgressor himself, he feared the worst for the people he knew.

And Flynn was right. He had to take care of them. It wasn't like none of the knights listened to Flynn that weren't directly in his squad, so he could still manage to get people off the Lower Quarter's back. They shouldn't have to live every day wondering if another one of them would be taken by Enforcers. They shouldn't have to be terrified of sticking up for each other.

Flynn's reaction was better than he expected though, knowing Yuri would be out there with other transgressors. Yuri could stick up for them all he wanted, but without Flynn knowing what their actual "crimes" were, there was any number of things they could've been. Luckily the group he worked with really was a good group. They were, in truth, a combination of having committed what were, by law, crimes, and others who hadn't actually committed a crime at all.

It was almost a relief that Flynn took it well, but not entirely if only because Yuri could still hear and see the pain he was in. Yuri wished he could finish his original mission with Flynn rather than having to do this separate, but with everything that had happened it was... somewhat unrealistic without Yuri pulling any strings that would make him look actually worse or just outright jeopardize Flynn.

One thing Flynn was right about though was that Yuri wouldn't be totally alone. He had people to go back to, and he'd taken up this mission to destroy Vision Centrals on his own. If he really felt the need to be more protected, he could just stay with them. It wasn't like they were forcing him to do this. Fact was though, they were handling his original mission, more or less... and at that point it was just redundant to do it separately from them.

But Yuri shook his head at Flynn's apology. There was nothing to apologize for and that was just the whole truth. Yuri gave him the option. He didn't need to accept it, and he was right that he had other things he could be doing. "Your plan is to help people. You don't need to apologize for that."

This though... was one more reason he didn't want to stop for Flynn. Leaving again would just be more difficult. If this had been like before, he would have done it fine knowing he could just come back whenever. He couldn't safely do that anymore. Maybe he never would be able to ever again. When Kanata's group did what they had to do, what would happen? What would change? Would transgressors be free again?

None of them knew. For all they knew their lives could be ruined forever. No going back to just being... a person. Some of them had killed people, but... what about the ones who did nothing wrong at all? The ones who were lied about? The ones who had to live like this because people were cruel and hateful? Whenever Yuri saw Vicious so aggressively having fun threatening people, he... couldn't blame him for it. If the world didn't treat him like it did, he wouldn't have become so spiteful.

Now even Yuri was starting to understand.

Gently he rested his fingers on Flynn's wrist, not quite taking hold of his hold but regaining contact. "If I can send for you I will, just... don't get caught. And if something happens, try to search for me. Use whatever information you have. If you ever get condemned, I... need to be there. Someday I'll tell you why, but... I can fight them off. I can... destroy them." But he couldn't get into Blood Sins right now. Flynn's knights would eventually be back. He couldn't put Flynn at risk and cause tension between him and his own knights.

But at the same time, Yuri knew he could reasonably be killed at any time, too. If it wasn't a human, it could be very well be Enforcers, and if he were with Kanata's group at the time, Kasque herself. At the end of the day he wasn't invincible. Just capable of doing things normal transgressors couldn't.

Before he pulled back to leave, he leaned over and pushed a light kiss on Flynn's lips. He could be as stubborn as he wanted about affection before. He didn't have that luxury anymore. He could literally be dead tomorrow.

So he held it for as long as he could before his nerves started to warn him again. Remind him they weren't safe, much less like this if someone saw them. He hated it, but... he couldn't put Flynn in danger just to be selfish. When he pulled back he rested their foreheads together, keeping his voice low. "I love you. Be careful."

So that was why… He really should have known. Even if Yuri had some sort of bitter grudge against Vision Central, he had a feeling that Yuri wouldn’t be destroying them just for the sake of it. No, he always found better ways to spend his energy. It was obvious there was some reason behind it and now that Flynn heard it, it made so much sense. 

It was relieving, really, to hear that Yuri wasn’t totally alone. He didn’t know these Transgressors, as far as he knew, but whoever they were had gained Yuri’s trust and that was enough to put Flynn more at ease. But just… Most importantly, he wasn’t alone. He wasn’t fully dealing with all of this alone. He wasn’t carrying the entire burden on his shoulders and that was enough to nearly have Flynn cry in relief. 

“...So you’re not fully alone… Oh, Thank goodness.” He whispered, the relief bursting from him in the form of weak laughter. 

He listened patiently, letting his fingers thread with Yuri’s when Yuri held his hand back. He would give anything to not have his gloves on so he could actually feel the warmth of Yuri’s hand right now. It would probably be the much needed comfort that he needed right now. Because as Yuri explained his plan, Flynn knew exactly what needed to happen. Yuri and his group had a plan to change the world. To make a world where vision orbs were not needed and someone couldn’t be condemned simply because of he-said, she-said accusations. 

And Flynn knew that he had no place in those plans. Not directly anyway. 

“...I want to go with you, Yuri.” Flynn started but he can barely get it out before his breath hitches because his next words were going to be so hard. He didn’t want to let go of Yuri. He didn’t want to say goodbye, even if it was temporary. This was a dangerous mission that Yuri had taken up. There was a big chance that they wouldn’t see each other for a very long time. Too long. 

“But you’ve already told me where I’m going to be needed for something like this. And… unfortunately, it isn’t by your side. Not– Not now at least.” Flynn squeezes Yuri’s hand like a lifeline and his eyes dart out towards the streets. “You said it yourself. The knights will have to work overtime. Without Vision Central, innocent people will not be condemned. But criminals who are actually hurting others will get away as well. That’s where I step in. I’ll need to step in and be the one who protects the innocent and punishes the unjust. Without the use of the Vision orbs and Vision Central.” 

Flynn knew that by going with Yuri, he would be throwing all of that away. He would be leaving the Lower Quarter defenseless and would practically be throwing his squad to the sharks. He couldn’t do that to them, not after spending all this time building them up. For the time being, he had to stay where he was, despite his personal feelings on the matter. No matter how badly he didn’t want to let go of Yuri. 

Taking a deep breath, he stops squeezing Yuri’s hand and it’s just too painful to look up at him, so he keeps his eyes trained down, letting them gaze over Yuri’s scars and the Stain of Guilt. He takes another shuddering breath. And then another. And then one more and he’s trying to stay calm and collected. He’s trying so hard. “But I still want to help you. I’m tired of seeing people I care about getting put under the ax for nothing. I want things to change too. So, I’m going to do some investigating on my end as well. There’s suspicious activity happening within the knights that I can’t just ignore. So unfortunately, I have my own mission to complete here before I could even consider coming with you. So… I’m… I’m sorry.”

Flynn lets his hand slip from Yuri’s grasp as he tries to tell himself that he should be happy. He knew that Yuri was alive so none of the other details mattered, right? So long as Yuri was alive, it didn’t matter if Flynn couldn’t be right next to him. So long as he was breathing and still pushing forward, that was all Flynn needed. 

He just wished it was easier to convince himself of this. But despite how much he told himself that he should just be grateful that Yuri was alive, he just wanted to stay by him, no matter what. But that simply… wasn’t in the cards. 

“I want you to know… If you ever need anything, please contact me and I will do what I can.” Finally, finally Flynn is able to force himself to look Yuri in the eyes and he swallows the lump in his throat as he tries to keep his face as neutral as possible. Oh, but he was just such a terrible actor.

“And… even if you think you can’t come back to Zaphias, I want you to know that I’m still here for you, Yuri. You know you still have a home here with me, right…? I know it doesn’t seem possible because of everything but no matter what happens and how much time passes, I’ll always welcome you home as long as I live.”

[cloudyyoimiya]

With a S/o That Is In the Port Mafia; Dazai, Chuuya, and Nikolai

Possible warnings: Violence, blood, stalking in Nikolai’s bit, injuries (character and reader receiving).

Osamu Dazai

Oh goodness there are two ways we can tackle this.

First off, if we’re talking about Dark Era Dazai, he would like how the mafia brought him and his s/o together.

Most likely, you’d be one of his subordinates. You only existed to carry out his orders and do dirty jobs that he didn’t want to do. Such a wonderful reason to live, huh?

One day he might’ve caught you ranting to Chuuya about how awful Dazai was. Dazai being Dazai, he interrupted your conversation and tried to make it look like you were the bad guy. He wouldn’t lie though, the way you carried yourself in the mafia was fascinating.

After this encounter, Dazai kept a close eye on you. Over time you two became friends… then to something more.

You two were unstoppable; a true force to be reckoned with. Dazai would pamper the hell out of his s/o while he was still in the mafia.

He was an executive, so why not spend the money on his reason to live?

Over all, a relationship with Dazai in the Dark Era wouldn’t be so bad. In fact, it would be quite normal despite all of the crimes that have been committed.

Then there’s Armed Detective Agency Dazai.

You tried to hide your profession from him, you really tried! But Dazai will always see past your lies. Once he found out that you were in the Port Mafia, an argument broke out.

His s/o and Dazai rarely argue… so this was quite tough. Dazai wanted you out of the mafia; start a new life free of meaningless bloodshed. Of course you stood your ground, it is quite difficult to just get up and leave from the mafia after all.

And since you were the ADA’s enemy, he couldn’t tell anyone about your relationship. You were the enemy. All he wanted to do was brag about how much you spoil him, and how much he loves you. But since you were in the mafia, he couldn’t.

Begrudgingly, Dazai let you stay in the mafia. If you really wanted to stay there, then so be it.

The final straw was when you came home injured. A bullet was lodged in your shoulder. Dazai begged that you needed to leave, and this time you listened.

He contacted Ango and started the process of erasing your past crimes. Ango only agreed because he couldn’t bare to see Dazai down in the dumps about this whole situation.

It may have taken a few years, but you were officially able to go out in public again! Dazai introduced you to everyone at the Agency, and they loved you.

Both eras of Dazai would have their ups and downs, but it would be manageable.

Chuuya Nakahara

Goodness, the first time he saw you, it was on the battlefield. You were cutting through enemies left and right. Your movements made you look as if you were dancing.

Once the scuffle was over, he immediately went to talk to you. He complimented your movements, and asked if you’d like to spar with him some time. You said yes since saying no would be disobeying orders from a mafia executive.

When the time finally came, you went and sparred with the executive. He gave you some trouble, and he ended up winning, but he did have… fun.

He extended his hand to you, wanting to help you up from where you were laying. You took his hand, and muttered a quick “thanks” before scurrying off somewhere.

After this event, he kept seeing you everywhere. Each time he saw you, his feelings started to grow. You were just so interesting to him!

One time you and Chuuya were sent on a mission somewhere. Originally, you were supposed to go on this mission alone since it was just a simple stakeout, but Chuuya insisted on joining you. He sat right next to you as you two watched the targets interact.

Once you got all of the information you needed, Chuuya confessed to you. You accepted, and happily started to date in secret.

He asked Mori if you could be transferred to become one of his subordinates, and Mori said yes. The head of the Port Mafia knew what was going on, but he decided not to say anything on it.

Much like Dazai, Chuuya would spoil you. He would buy you dresses/suits, expensive jewelry, and random other things. You told him he should stop since the prices were steadily increasing, but Chuuya refused.

You made him feel human.

One time he came back from a mission and he had several gunshot wounds all over his body. You forced him to take some time off to recover, and you helped him with rather simple tasks.

He hated having to be babied like this, but what could he do? He was injured.

Overall, if Chuuya’s s/o was in the Port Mafia, it would only bring the two closer.

Nikolai Gogol

Nikolai <33

Anyways, you two most likely met while you were out running errands. You had ran out of bullets, so you needed to restock as soon as possible.

As you were walking to the shady dealing, you bumped into Nikolai in a dark alleyway. Blood was scattered all over the walls as the clown stood over the body of the dealer.

When the two of you locked eyes, Nikolai brought his cape over his mouth and started to ramble about quizzes and how you should be careful about who you make deals with.

You sighed as you exited the alleyway, and this action alone intrigued Nikolai. You didn’t have a reaction towards the scene in front of you! Did you happen to be as used to gruesome scenes as he was?

Over a few weeks, he’d watch you. He found out that you worked for the Port Mafia, and that intrigued him as well.

“Coincidentally,” you ran into the clown again. He offered to take you on a date, and you said yes. You wouldn’t lie, his goofy demeanor made you think of him a lot. He just.. killed someone and started cracking jokes.

After this date, you two officially started to date. A few months into the relationship though, Nikolai would have confessed that he knew you worked for the Port Mafia. Just like in the alleyway, you had no reaction. You just sighed and confirmed it.

Once Fyodor had caught wind of you being in a relationship with Nikolai, he’d ask the clown to turn you into a spy for the Decay of Angels. Nikolai was conflicted, but he decided to follow his orders.

When Nikolai brought it up to you, you agreed to do it rather easily. You were sick of how the mafia treated you, so it wasn’t really debatable to begin with.

Nikolai hugged you rather tightly as he rambled about how much he loved you and something about freedom.

If you didn’t agree to work with the Decay of Angels, Nikolai would try to understand why. He wouldn’t tell Fyodor of your decision though. He would find another way to grasp the information that you were supposed to give.

To be honest, Nikolai wouldn’t really care about your affiliation with the Port Mafia as long as nothing bad came of it.

a/n: i need more nikolai requests hes so baby girl

Requests open!

[thequackcity]

Quackity and Schlatt’s Relationship - More Complicated Then You Think

(this is all /rp and about the characters from the dream smp! pls assume i have the dignity not to write analysis of youtubers)

recently there was a bit of discourse surrounding the relationship between Quackity and Schlatt floating around on tumblr. tho i never saw the original post that sparked the conversation, i did see a few posts that were inspired by it mentioning how they disliked that the original post implied that Quackity and Schlatt were mutually abusive and/or equally bad for each other 

since i never saw the original post, i can't be sure if that's what the op meant to imply. it's not really my place to speak about a post that i never got the chance to read. BUT the conversation that was caused by the post in question did get me thinking about how this fandom treats the relationship between Quackity and Schlatt and how little nuance there is in discussions about it

now before i say anything else, i want to make a few things clear:

i don't think Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship is mutually abusive. no need to worry about hearing that from this post

i don't look down on ppl who have different interpretations of their relationship

there will be potentially triggering content in this analysis. i will place a quick warning whenever i think one is needed!

their relationship is romantic in canon and therefore i’ll be treating it as romantic

alright now that we’ve gotten all of that out of the way, we can finally get on with the analysis! i apologize for how long this is gonna be

part 1: let's talk relationship!

i think we can all agree that Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was not exactly a healthy one. tho it didn't start out that way, it certainly turned into what could be read as abusive or toxic (i personally read their relationship as being abusive in its later half due to evidence provided by the text, but i understand if others prefer to view it as just toxic instead)

but what happened that led to their partnership ending so badly? what caused all of this mess?

well, it was a lot of things. but we will get to that later. let's talk relationship first!

from the very beginning, Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was pretty one-sided. tho they both clearly liked each other as friends/partners in crime both before and after the election (yes they did interact before the election!) Quackity was also interested in Schlatt romantically- something that Schlatt wasn't fully committed to

as we all know from the infamous date stream and from a few other moments, Quackity and Schlatt enjoyed playfully flirting with each other- tho it was pretty obvious that Quackity was more serious about it then Schlatt was even tho Schlatt considered Quackity to be very attractive

in my opinion, Quackity is someone who wants a long term relationship, while Schlatt is more interested in flings. this can be seen in Schlatt refusing to marry Quackity and rejecting most of his advances while Quackity tried his best to convince him to feel otherwise. Tommy put it best: Quackity is just one of Schlatt’s many bitches U_U

to Quackity, the romantic aspect of their relationship was very important. because Schlatt never actually shot him down or told him that he didn't feel the same way, Quackity took that to mean that they were truly in love. Schlatt on the other hand wasn't very invested in the romantic side of things but clearly valued Quackity’s looks and his support as an ally against Pogtopia so he never fully rejected Quackity’s advances

this might not seem like too big of a deal considering the other things that happened between them, but i think it shows part of the nature of their relationship. there is a lot of miscommunication and, on Schlatt’s end, manipulation of emotions. love is a strong motivator for loyalty and Schlatt is a smart guy who would know how to use that to his advantage

but that isn't to say that Schlatt didn't ever care about Quackity!

Schlatt is a complicated guy and figuring out when he's actually being genuine can be pretty difficult. but i think there are some moments that point to Schlatt genuinely caring about Quackity

when he was alive, Schlatt was pretty paranoid. not as paranoid as Wilbur, but certainly up there. but there were never any times where he truly questioned Quackity’s loyalties after his first day as president. Schlatt also seemed truly upset that Quackity betrayed him, bringing up their status as partners in crime while ranting about how much it hurt him and singling Quackity out while talking about how he had been abandoned during his time of need

Schlatt also spent a lot of time sulking after Quackity betrayed him and whining to Ponk about needing a new bitch. this is in contrast to how angry he was after Tubbo betrayed him- both during and after the execution

there is also the situation with the Big Man Gym 

after being dead for a while, Schlatt contacted Quackity despite them leaving off on bad terms and asked for him to visit him in his cave gym. when Quackity showed up, Schlatt talked about how he valued their relationship and the good times they had together. tho this can easily be seen as emotional manipulation, Schlatt’s a lot smarter than he seems and- if he doesnt have memory issues due to being a ghost- would know that Quackity’s opinion of him was in the dump at the time of his death and most likely wouldn't have improved since then. Fundy has a higher opinion of Schlatt than Quackity does and is someone who obviously craves validation. but Schlatt went to Quackity first anyway and trusted him to help revive him

i think that this is all good evidence that points towards Schlatt truly caring about Quackity as much as someone like Schlatt can care about anyone- or at least valuing him as a companion

i also think that it is pretty common knowledge that Quackity cared about Schlatt- and possibly still does- but i will go over a bit of evidence that i haven’t already mentioned before we move on to the next part

Quackity tried multiple times to impress Schlatt (like when he lied about knowing how to play chess), would attempt to help Schlatt when he was drowning in water, sadly said that they could have had something together while Schlatt was dying in the caravan, and implied that he wouldn’t have left if Schlatt hadn’t taken down the white house. Quackity also willingly went to the Big Man Gym after being summoned there by Schlatt and wanted to revive him long before the revive book became part of the story

part 2: what made it fall apart?

everything i've said so far has been pretty interesting (hopefully) but it doesn't really answer the original question: what went wrong to turn Schlatt and Quackity’s mainly positive partnership sour?

well it comes down to two things in my opinion: their incompatible desires for political power and Schlatt’s deteriorating mental state

Quackity wanted political power from the beginning and wasn't afraid to be open about his desires. he pooled his votes with Schlatt because Schlatt offered him the position of vice president, something Wilbur and Tommy weren’t willing to give to him. tho Quackity obviously cared about L’Manburg and wanted to see good things for it, he also desired power and was willing to team up with someone he didn't fully agree with to get said power

at 32:40 in this video, Quackity talks about how in politics everyone uses everyone so it's alright if Schlatt is using him. he then talks about how he doesn't want to be a man with no power and how he understands that Schlatt’s main goal is also gaining/keeping power. Quackity also shows a bit of his naughty evil side by saying if he overthrows Schlatt then the fun ends too early! 

(side note: these two are pretty evenly matched in intelligence and manipulativeness, i love it!) 

it's a bit of a fandom misconception that Quackity was a love sick yes man during the Manburg era. tho Quackity did want to please Schlatt and was in love with him, he didn't shy away from standing up to or disagreeing with Schlatt when he believed it was needed

at around 26:12 of this video, Quackity and Schlatt meet together in private and Quackity tells Schlatt off for playing down his role in the power structure of Manburg. since this was very early in Schlatt’s reign, Quackity shows no fear towards him and confidently tells him not to treat him like that

Quackity also broke Niki out of jail after regretting letting her be put there in the first place, tried to convince Schlatt to not execute Tubbo, jumped in front of Fundy when Schlatt tried to attack him, tried to stop Schlatt from tearing down buildings, and attempted to protect the white house he built from being destroyed by Schlatt. these are not behaviors of a pure yes man but of someone who, despite fear, has the confidence to speak up for himself even when disrespected by someone in authority

Quackity has always been someone who wanted power and someone who was never a yes man to authority. this contradicts with how Schlatt believed Quackity should act as vice president. in Schlatt’s opinion, Quackity’s one job is to sit around looking pretty while Schlatt does all of the important things and holds all of the power. Schlatt was a big fan of promoting people to worthless positions of authority and its pretty obvious that he considered vice president to be similar to the fake positions he gave Fundy and Tubbo 

in the end, this was a big part of what destroyed their relationship. like it or not, Quackity’s a power hungry guy and always has been. he didn't like that Schlatt constantly shoved him aside and refused to listen to him

now onto the nasty bit...Schlatt’s mental state

cw for mentions of alcoholism, mental deterioration, and abusive behavior  

before i say anything more, i just want to say that i don't think having issues with alcoholism makes someone a bad person. i personally have some issues with such things so it would be pretty stupid of me to say being an alcoholic makes you a bad person. alcoholism does negatively affect your cognitive functions tho and, combined with other health issues, can cause some of the very serious mental problems that Schlatt clearly struggles with

throughout the Manburg era, Schlatt’s mental state rapidly deteriorated. he went from a pretty normal- if eccentric- guy who had a drinking problem, to someone who was delirious most of the time. it's a sharp and noticeable decline that caused a lot of pain for Quackity due to Schlatt often taking his excess aggression out on him by yelling at him and/or belittling him. tho Schlatt often belittled Quackity before he went fully off of the deep end, it was never as aggressive as it was when he was in this delirious state of mind

it was during one of Schlatt’s most aggressive and delirious moments that he tore down the white house despite Quackity’s protests. as we all know, this caused Quackity to snap and kill Schlatt (it's more complicated than that but we will get back to that). as mentioned previously, Quackity implied that he would have stayed with Schlatt if the white house hadn’t been destroyed

in my opinion, these two things combined are the biggest reasons why Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship fell apart. their differing desires for power were not compatible and Schlatt’s awful behavior while his mental state declined caused a rift between them that couldn't be fixed

part 3: how toxic was it really?

cw for emotional and physical abuse 

as i said all the way back in part one, Quackity and Schlatt’s relationship was not healthy. i have provided many examples in the other two parts that shine a light onto why it wasn't healthy, but i didn't show the entire picture

there are many moments that show exactly how Schlatt treated Quackity when he was acting at his worst and none of them are pretty. tho Schlatt was never truly aggressive with his insults until he started to go off of the deep end, that doesn't mean that what he said wasn't negatively affecting Quackity

Schlatt would belittle, insult, and mock Quackity for his appearance not being up to his standards, for his opinions, and for being emotional in ways that Schlatt disapproved of like crying. tho Schlatt would often brush off Quackity’s reactions towards this cruel behavior, it's very clear that Schlatt’s treatment of him has stuck with Quackity in many ways

Quackity is very sensitive about his appearance and it seems to be because of how badly Schlatt hurt his self esteem during their time together. Schlatt tied Quackity’s worth to his appearance and then would claim he wasn't meeting his standards of attractiveness. we can tell that this has stuck with Quackity because of his sensitivity towards people bringing up the scar on his face (something that greatly alters his physical appearance) and he still reacts very badly when Schlatt calls him the mocking nickname flatty patty

speaking of flatty patty- that stupid insult shockingly has a lot of weight in Quackity’s relationship with Schlatt. tho its something the audience is meant to laugh at, the nickname also shows just how little Schlatt respects Quackity because he's constantly throwing it around just to make Quackity upset. Schlatt’s last words are flatty patty all because he wanted to get in one last dig at his ex and ruin Quackity’s day even further 

Schlatt tends to do a lot of things that are intended to make Quackity upset. tearing down the room Quackity made for him in the white house is the biggest example of this- especially since Schlatt mentions how it will upset Quackity while he does it. you can see this moment at around 19:10 of this video

and now let's get into the elephant in the room when it comes to these two: Quackity was scared of Schlatt. tho we never really see Schlatt hit or attack Quackity physically outside of their confrontation at the white house or their confrontation in the caravan, these clips imply that Quackity was at the very least scared of Schlatt physically harming him in some way 

as for actually physically harming him, Schlatt hits Quackity multiple times with a pickaxe and with his fists during their white house fight. Quackity hits Schlatt a couple times too, tho these are all primarily defensive blows since he is trying to protect himself and his property. he also chases after Quackity with a bow after Quackity’s plan to trick him into signing Manburg over to the Pogtopians fails and hits him multiple times during the caravan confrontation

all of this evidence shows that Schlatt was an abusive (or at least toxic) partner towards Quackity and someone who greatly affected him in many ways

tho Quackity did a few questionable things throughout his relationship with Schlatt (such as trying to get Schlatt to have sex with him despite Schlatt not being interested as shown in the later half of this video) and did some downright morally wrong things during his time as vice president of Manburg, no one deserves the pain of an abusive relationship- even a person who has done bad things

as a brief side note before we move on because i know people will bring it up if i skip over it, Quackity did- and most likely still does- want to literally possess Glatt. he brought up reviving Schlatt and using him as a political pawn after Schlatt’s funeral and during their conversation at the Big Man Gym Quackity talked about owning Glatt and having him work at Las Nevadas with no pay

this is unsettling behavior to say the least but this essay isnt about the aftermath of their relationship so much as it is about their relationship when it was actually happening. maybe i will make another post talking more about how Quackity’s relationship with Schlatt affected him even after Schlatt’s death and/or about Quackity’s relationship with Glatt

part 4: final thoughts

i’m not exactly sure why the nuances in Schlatt and Quackity’s relationship get lost when it comes to the fandom, but it’s pretty disappointing to see. hopefully this essay can help people take a closer look at canon and maybe even help them find something interesting that they’d want to explore!

tho the point of this essay is to clear up any misconceptions and hopefully add some nuance to the conversations surrounding Schlatt and Quackity’s relationship, i also wrote it in hopes of showing people how fascinating these two partners in crime were back in the Manburg days. i didn’t cover everything but i think i did a pretty good job for my first analysis post in the dsmp fandom

also since you read to the end, i must say thank you! it really does means a lot to me that you did. i hope you enjoyed and maybe even learned something. this post can be used as a resource if anyone wants to use it as such

here’s a tiny devil Quackity for your troubles <3

[kirishimasharkteetheijirou]

Just came up with a new AU.

Villain!Rei Todoroki. And her children. They're all villains. Or rather, 3/4 of her children are villains.

Here's how it goes: after Touya's "death", Rei breaks out of the hospital using her quirk, rushes home and kills Endeavor. She stabs him with ice or freezes him to death. She's not really thinking straight, this is just the moment when she snaps.

I don't know if her children see her, but regardless, she takes them and leaves to hide somewhere else, maybe an abandoned building, while the cops arrive and look for her. When they discover Endeavor's body, she's determined as the most likely suspect, given the death of her eldest son and the disappearance of the rest. They see Fuyumi, Natsuo and Shouto as kidnapped victims. But really, they love their mother, and they're secretly sort of glad she did what she did. They see her as their savior. So when the cops or heros DO show up, and Rei has to defend herself, they defend her too. Eventually, the four of them are running from the law, using their quirks to attack cops and heros alike and unintentionally making a name for themselves as a family of dangerous villains.

It gets worse when Rei begins to blame the Hero Safety Commission for everything that's happened - Endeavor's obsession with rankings that he forced onto their children, the legal protection he got from them, her forced hospitalization... her family couldn't be safe from him because they lied and swept everything under the rug at the expense of the five of them - Rei and the kids. Eventually, it resulted on an insane dead child and a disfigured child.

So she begins hunting down commission authorities. Especially the ones involved with Endeavor's protection. And then she goes further - she exposes heros who hurt civillians and get away with it. She acts as a vigilante for women and children in danger, going as far as to kill their abusers. So she has earned a bit of a cult following, you know? Not a literal cult ofc, but it's hard to hate her. A hero or two has clumsily let her go in the past. People have even contacted her to ask for help. And of course the Commission can't let a villain expose them so easily, she's a HUGE threat to them, so they spread the most horrific propaganda against her, making up crimes she didn't commit and hiding her good acts, and lying about her relationship with her children: they say she's kidnapped and enslaved them, and when dealing with her, it's imperative to separate them from their mother to rescue them.

But actually, her children work with her willing. They support her cause and are happy to fight alongside her. Well, happy may not be the right word, they're all a bit conflicted, but this is the choice they make. It's not at all about Rei the Villain, no, it's a family business. Their strength comes in their numbers. It's all of them - Shouto, Natsuo and Fuyumi - investigating heros and the Safety Commission, hunting them down, exposing them, humilliating them... They believe in what they're doing. They are proud go call themselves villains, opposed to these so-called Heros. They love and protect their mother unconditionally and she offers the same kindness to them. Heros simply wouldn't understand.

Now the fun part is, this is actually a sort of role-swap AU. Villain Todoroki family... And pro hero Touya Todoroki. I imagine he was found by Aizawa, before his "death", and got lightly scolded for hurting himself, yes, but mostly he just received the care and attention his father never gave him. After nearly burning to death and disappearing from the scene, he wandered to Aiwaza on his own to ask for help. Aizawa took him to the hospital, got him patched up etc. He wanted to let his parents know he was alive, but it turns out that... his father is dead... at his mother's hands. Because she wanted to avenge Touya. That's when things spiral out of control: the Hero Safety Commission decides it's best to keep Touya hidden, because otherwise his family would stop at nothing to find him. Let them believe he's dead. Touya shouldn't know the details of their current state, either. He ends up under Aizawa's legal custody, because of course he does (but he's not gonna call him dad lol the age gap is too small, he just calls him by his first name or something). His name is changed to Touya Aizawa, but he prefers to go by Dabi on his everyday life. He goes to therapy. Aizawa convinces him to get into a hero school so at the very least he learns to control his quirk and not get himself hurt. And maybe by now Touya had given up on being a hero, because heros brought nothing but pain to him and his family, but he respects Aizawa's humility and lack of regard for this celebrity culture that wrecked him and his father. But he enters U.A, he's the top of his class, he finds a way to use his power without fucking himself up, and he realizes that he actually kind of likes it, you know? It feels... cleansing. Like this thing that hurt him so much is being stripped of it's traumatic factor, and he can enjoy it in a healthy way.

He graduates and becomes an underground hero like his mentor. He works mostly independantly, every now and then teaming up with other heros but mostly on his own. However, this time around Pro Hero Hawks has an interesting project and Touya doesn't want to be left out. He's investigating a strange family of villains, all of them with ice quirks. Touya pretends to obediently collaborate, but he's really going behind his partner's back to find these villains before anyone else can.

Izuku, the protagonist, gets roped into this mess when he wanders into Hawks' agency during a work study during his first year at U.A. He's crazy smart, Hawks and Touya are on the intel-gathering stage right now, and Hawks think they could use some help. The kid can read old newspapers and get witnesses' phone numbers while he and Touya kick ass. Touya isn't so happy to have another pair of eyes on him.

Tddk eventually happens, after a pretty bad encounter with the Todoroki family and the youngest member is successfully captured.

Some notes:

Rei, Fuyumi, Natsuo and Shouto all use their ice quirks to flee and fight. It's kinda their brand. Shouto is not allowed to use his fire quirk.

Rei bleached Fuyumi and Shouto's hair so it would be completely white. She can't stand to see their red hair. It drives her mad. They both feel a bit bad about it; it hurts to know their natural hair scares their mother, but it scares them a little bit, too. Shouto has to admit it's more comfortable to look in the mirror and only see his mother in him.

Sometimes, when they're safe at home (which is, whatever abandoned building they're squatting at today), Shouto wears bandages over his left eye, because his mother is uncomfortable with that blue eye of his, it looks to much like Endeavor's. She's also upset by seeing his scar, so Shouto tries to hide it as well.

Each sibling is a bit conflicted about what they're doing. They know it's not healthy, but they can't stop now or they'll all end up in jail, save for Shouto who will be taken away, and they'd never see each other again. Plus, their cause is honest, right? They're in the right and the heros are in the wrong. They're only trying to protect their family. Natsuo is probably the most convinced one. Fuyumi is more concerned with keeping her mother and siblings safe, but she can see their point. Shouto is almost convinced as Natsuo, but he's less moved by anger and revenge, and more interested in not letting other people go through what's happened to him. That, and his love for his mother. He knows there's something wrong, but as he sees it, he's making a flawed but concious and informed decision by following her and sharing her goals. Deep down he IS angry at Endeavor and he DOES want revenge but he won't admit it to himself.

They're fucked up but they're so fucking cool they look amazing seriously they're so badass. Kaminari would stan. In fact Kaminari is probably on a villain!Todoroki apologist subreddit because they're just so scary and metal. They're compared more than once to a pack of white wolves. In fact, that's the theme i wanna go for when i come up with a villain name for them. I think about them and think about Princess Mononoke and the wolf, you know how there's this sort of Wolf Goddess who has three children (two biological and one adoptive human girl) who fight for/alongside her. I wonder if the concept comes from some legend or poem. If it does, I'd like to find it, see if there's anything there that applies to this AU, and draw inspiration from there.

Speaking of cool, Touya looks exactly like he does in canon. He's just edgy like that. Doesn't look like a hero at all, which comes in handy when he needs to do underground work. He's also a bit of an asshole but at least he uses his power for good. Mostly. He once shaved Hawk's wings while he was asleep as a prank. He also has an habit of sticking out his foot to make deku trip and calls it "training" but otherwise he's a good fella.

Deku had never heard of this Hero Dabi person before, because he's just so deep underground. He's Not Like The Other Heros, you see. But as soon as they meet Deku goes into fanboy mode, and instead of insulting him, Touya decides to fuck with him and set him up to impossible tasks for fun. Like oh yeah go ask for this person, their name is [obscene pun] and poor Deku buys it and goes around the agency office asking if anyone knows where he can find [obscene pun].

In this AU, Deku still hasn't figured out how to control OFA, and when he gets injured during a fight, Dabi laughs his ass off and is like "lol same".

Deku rationalizes Dabi's bullying as tRaInInG. "Oh, he's helping me build a thicker skin! He's so smart" and isn't even hurt. He takes everything as a CHALLENGE and Dabi finds that beyond amusing.

Touya has had a lot of problem with authority and the Commission threatened more than once to have his liscence revoked.

Their whole thing is a buddy cop comedy.

AFO isn't around in this AU, All Might probably put an end to him for real a long time ago. That means (recent manga spoilers ahead) that Aoyama is still quirkless, and I get to have my Deku & Aoyama childhood friends AU. Aoyama is in the support course, and he designs the most sparkling hero costumes.

I'm tempted to make all the LoV members "good guys". Shigaraki was put into U.A as a teen just so he could learn to control his quirk. He doesn't want to be a hero. Doesn't even have a liscence. But at least he can touch things without destroying them in an instant. Twice got the help he needed and eventually adopted Toga, who also got the help she needed. Mr. Compress is a famous magician. Spinner is a gamer youtuber. They play DnD with Dabi on the weekends.

Did I mention cool badass icebending villain family? They always look after each other, always do what's best for the other, always find ways to make each other feel safe and happy while on the run. The three kids growing up as criminals, running from the law, but at least they are together. They have an unwavering loyalty to each other. They refuse to spend time with anyone else.

Fuyumi used to steal toys and stuffed animals for Natsuo and Shouto. She still does when she sees something she thinks they'll like. She also cooks for them most days, but once he was old enough Shouto began learning so he could help.

Shouto accidentally using his left side and freaking out, so his siblings need to calm him down without their mother noticing

Rei going feral when one of her children is in danger and absolutely fucking up the enemy with an ice wall. I want terrifyingly protective mom Rei.

The four of them working together to commit crimes 😊 and Dabi studying them from afar, not quite knowing what to do but certain that he needs to reach them before anyone else.

When Shoto is captured and brought to Hawks' agency - Touya doesn't want the cops to get involved just yet - he's an emo lil boy, so fucking silent and rude lol but Deku thinks He Looks Very Sad and Wants To Save Him and other crap Deku would think. He's the one instructed to watch over him most of the time while Hawks and Touya go out to be Cool. Eventually they become friends or something somehow. But before that I want to see the whole family attacking the building to rescue Shouto >:3

[unhingedexperimenter]

"That can be easily explained. I am an extremely new villain, you see. He wouldn't have had time to tell you fine gentlemen about me." To Henry's surprise, they both seemed to have accepted his counterpart's explanation. "Well. I guess it would be okay then. Right, Charlie?" The taller henchman had given a slight shrug before nodding in agreement. "Wonderful! Now, give me a tour." They gave him a confused look at that. "Show me around." The henchmen finally understood, and both nodded happily. "Sure thing. How rude of us." They were easier to fool than Hyde originally expected. It was different than what he expected it to be. Not as mad scientist as they'd imagine it to be. It was more home-like. Had a certain warmth to it. Though the couch looked like cheese was to be expected. Hyde was confused by the orange tree bearing fruit. "What's with the tree?" Hyde pointed at it. Manny answered without missing a beat. "Oh, that's Dr. Two-Brains' orange tree. He drinks freshly squeezed orange juice. He says it keeps him from getting sick from all the cheese." This villain seemed more eccentric yet clever at the same time. Despite being a cheese thief, he was considered the city's top villain. What truly caught his attention was the inventions the mad scientist had made. Hyde wandered over towards where they were while Manny was explaining the orange juice thing. “Wow. Whiskers can really build some impressive inventions.” He was eyeing up a gigantic ray made to turn buildings into cheese. “I think we should leave just in case Dr.Two-Brains comes back and the henchmen realize that you lied to them.” Hyde of course scoffed at that. “Nothing wrong with admiring someone else's work. I'm not planning on stealing any of these anyways. Just taking a wee look. That's all.” Manny and Charlie popped up behind Hyde unexpectedly. “Yeah, the boss was really proud of building that one.” This caused the criminal to jump from being startled. “Is that so? How long did it take him to build it?” Manny and Charlie shook their heads. The taller one whispered into the other ear. “Charlie said that the boss worked on that one a lot. We don't know exactly for long though.” Hyde was becoming increasingly more interested in the villain the more he heard. Henry didn't like where this was going but what could he do? Once Hyde had his mind set on something, he was going to go through with it to the end. Protesting and trying to convince him would only make the criminal all the more determined. “Wonderful. Thank you, gents, for giving that tour. It was fun but I really must be going now. I'll be talking to Whiskers afterwards so you won't have to explain this to him.” He took off before either of them could respond. 

Patricia had been looking through information about numerous criminals from London. “Ahah! Found our guy. Let's see. It says here that he was a nuisance of a thief. He didn't commit any crimes that were memorable. Doesn't seem like a villain. Though it's how he dealt with the authorities that made him a nuisance. Using different types of chemicals to get himself out of trouble mostly. Though I don't understand why this guy suddenly showed up here.

Hyde had found the motel with ease. Grinning happily, looking especially pleased with himself for finding the place on his own. “Told you I pay attention, dear doctor. Now all I have to do is walk in. Introduce myself. Convince them to let me join.” Henry still felt extremely hesitant with the others choices. “I don't know, Edward. Maybe you should be careful. You showing up out of nowhere, that's got to have raised some alarms for them.” Hyde continued on his way inside the motel. “I'll explain myself and they'll understand. I'm sure I'll be more than qualified. Why…why do you always doubt me? Jekyll?” There was some genuine hurt in Hyde's tone. His manic expression faltered for a moment. “It's not that I doubt you. Mostly. It's just that we should be careful. We don't know how they'll react.” The criminal frowned. “Well, we'll just see for ourselves then. That's the way we'll learn for sure.”

(You can tag me on my tgs side blog. I also apologize but I know a few Scottish words. So to anyone reading this I apologize for the inaccuracy.) Becky Boxleitner noticed a change in the atmosphere as she and her pet monkey Bob walked into the sixth grade classroom. All of the students were excitedly chatting with one another. Becky and Bob exchanged confused looks at the scene. 'What is going on?' They both thought. Becky walked to where her friends Violet Heaslip, Rose Franklin, and Todd Scoops Ming were sitting, also joining in the excited yet low volume chattering. "Hey guys what's going on?" Becky asked her friends. They each turned their heads to greet their friend. "Hey Becky guess what, we're getting a new teacher for our class!" Scoops exclaimed. Becky looked surprised at the announcement. Bob also mimicked her facial expression. "Wait really? What happened to Miss Davis?" Becky asked, wondering what happened to their old teacher. It was just a week only into the new school year so a sudden teacher exchange was a complete shock to Becky especially since there were no announcements about it beforehand. "Miss Davis had to move back home because of a family emergency." Rose Franklin answered. "The principal had to scramble to find a new teacher to fill in for our class. It was all last minute stuff." Becky nodded in understanding of her friends' answers. It was a nice perk to be friends who were upcoming reporters. Soon the final bell rang which indicated for every student to take their seats. Becky took her place beside her best friend Violet and Bob plopped down next to her. Soon a man who looked to be in his mid 30s walked in and towards the desk. He had curly brown air, an arched nose, and reddish brown eyes. He wore a tan button-down shirt with a red vest as well as brown slacks and dark suede shoes. The man gave a pleasant and warm smile to all the students there. "Hello my name is Dr. Henry Jekyll and I will be your teacher for the school year." Becky and the other kids ears perked up as they took note of the man's accent. Even Tobey became slightly interested in his new teacher. None of them were sure where their new teacher was from. Dr. Jekyll gave a light chuckle as if he could sense their growing curiosity about him. He lightly clapped his hands together to gain their undivided attention and focus. "Well since this is my first time teaching here, why don't we all play a little game so we can all get better acquainted with each other. Here's what to do. One at a time, say your name and share a wee bit about yourself. Likes, family, interests and all that. I'll go first to show ya what ah mean. Again. My name is Dr. Henry Jekyll. I was born in Glasgow but ah moved to London where I attended university. I have a five year old wee lassie or daughter named Amber. I enjoy chemistry and reading on occasions. Now who would like to go next?" @unhingedexperimenter

Of course Tobey had taken the opportunity to place attention on himself and to have a reason to boast about himself. “My name is Tobey McCallister the third and I will be the most intelligent student you'll meet here.” The others had rolled their eyes, used to this kind of behavior from their peers. Becky seemed to be the most annoyed by it. Having been forced to put up with his destructive tantrums in the past. Henry smiled just as warmly as before. Unbothered by the obnoxious behavior that the boy had been displaying. Tobey had been going on about himself for a good few minutes before the teacher finally spoke up. “Ahem, yes. Thank you for that Mr. McCallister. Would anyone else like to tell me a bit about themselves as well?” No one could tell that behind the facade, Dr. Henry Jekyll was becoming more irritated by the moment. Not by the child but by the pest that refused to leave him be. Scoffing within his head at what they just heard. He didn't share the disembodied voice's opinion but wanted to give the other children a chance to introduce themselves as well. To the others' shock, Tobey seemed to have taken this well. Quickly going back to his desk with no issues. Becky was relieved at that. Soon the other children had started to introduce themselves to their new teacher with little to no issues. He seemed genuinely nice enough to her. This new teacher didn't seem like most of the adults within this city. Some she had to define words repeatedly for. Dr. Jekyll knew what he was teaching and knew his vocabulary. It was Violet who had brought Becky out from her own thoughts, calling her name. Waving a hand in front of her face. “Becky?” The girl smiled in an embarrassed manner. “Huh? Yes?” Violet smiled, patient with her best friend. “Why don't you introduce yourself now? Nearly everybody else already did.” She had given a surprised expression. Becky hadn't realized that she was so lost within her thoughts until then. She stood up and began speaking. “My name is Becky Boxleitner and I also like libraries,reading and Pretty Princess.” The presence that was grating at the teacher's nerves had deemed this too dull to enjoy. Leaving Dr. Jekyll be to his teaching. Well, getting to know his students. He was happy to see that they were engaged in these activities that were meant to break the ice. Though one student in particular had caught his attention the most. Becky. While she did seem rather bright, there was something strange about her behavior at times. Pausing whatever she was doing at the time to listen in on something. Thinking it went unnoticed. Even once looking alarmed and she made an excuse to go to the bathroom. He had allowed it. Feeling that it would've been better to have let her. It seemed…oddly familiar. As if he had seen that behavior somewhere before but couldn't figure out exactly where from. When the school day was finally over, Becky had gone to go home like the others. Dr. Jekyll had of course stayed behind to set more things up within his new classroom. Making a plan on exactly what he'll actually start teaching the next day. Though, the grating voice had returned to be a thorn in his side. “Come on. Leave this boring stuff alone. Leave it until tomorrow. I've been pent up for far too long. Let's have some fun.” This had earned an eye roll and a loud huff from the teacher. “No, I've got to get this done now. You will have enough time tonight. Just be patient until then.” A shadowy figure formed in front of Dr. Jekyll. A frown on its face. “But this is so extremely dull. I want to stretch my legs. I want to make myself known already.” Dr. Jekyll glared. “And that is precisely why I'm so hesitant to let you out so soon. At least let us get acclimated to our surroundings first.” The figure let out an annoyed groan. “You know you want this as much as I do. Otherwise you'd never have any actual fun in the sad and pathetic life you call yours.”

@thecountoflondonfansite

[shootingsun]

pllsss tell me abt ur interpretation of A pls ty

HI YES I WILL DO THAT (this post is long and I am willing to rant more if I must)

Under the cut!!

Okay so A's real/true name was Aren Cadmus (because I think it's a pretty name and that is enough reasoning) - he knew his own name but never really talked about it to anyone but B, and that is what I shall refer to him as in this post along with A.

He was born on the 26th of September and was 19 when he died.

Backstory plot thing:

Before B came to the orphanage, A was the golden child of the orphanage, sweet, polite, respectful etc. Actually, Beyond didn't like him at first! Is this because he considered A to be a lost cause due to his short lifespan? Yes. But also because he thought Aren was too boring for him. But A thought that B was interesting and cool and did want to be his friend. They became friends eventually though, through the fun little thing we call the Power of Incredible Violence.

When they were both 9, B tried to run away from the orphanage in the middle of the night. He then ended up cornered in an alley in the small town nearby by someone with v obvious malicious intent. (This person had a very short lifespan, B noted at the time). Beyond was gonna fight back when they attempted to hurt him, but there was actually no need to because here comes Aren with a stick to beat the shit out of the attacker. Like, beat them into unconsciousness as they bleed out on the floor. Even at this time, B was not exactly Normal (TM) and was not scared in the slightest, infact he was a little bit like ":0, I thought u were basic but I guess I was wrong??". He then decides that this person is now going to be HIS person and that they can commit crimes together. It's a very good bonding activity :D. (Did the attacker bleed out and die? ...maybe, if they did, A didn't know).

Aren was totally down for violence and other sketchy things, it's just that he lied about it. B respected his commitment to his 'I'm a good person who most definitely wouldn't commit aggravated assualt' act. A was very pleased that he had made a friend who he didn't have to constantly lie about his moral compass to. It worked out for both of them :D. Also all of the teachers/adults were scared shitless because the seemingly sane one was now hanging out with with the kid who would shove children down the stairs in order to get to his monthly Akazukin Chacha manga delivery the minute it arrived. Aren liked that B didn't hide his darker tendencies, he really envied it sometimes. They became a chaos duo that may or may not stab you if you talked smack about the other.

Still plot but not exactly backstory:

It took them around a year of annoying every adult in the place but eventually A and BB got to share a room. A's favorite child was Linda because they both liked art and also because she wasn't a threat to his Sucessorship thing. He didn't care as much about being L as B did but he wasn't dispassionate about it or anything, he just tried not to make it his whole life (and failed miserably). He was never actually diagnosed with anything but he was Autistic (every Wammy kid is). Aren was told that he was gonna be L's sucessor when he was 13, but they had planned for him to be a successor earlier than that.

Also him and Beyond were kinda partners but also maybe not because nobody actually knew except for them what they were and they never told anyone. (I think it was romantic, but I'm open to anything as long as they were close ngl)

A was really good at drawing, he had sketchbooks and stuff. Really big on semi-realism but also liked to do abstract art on bad days. He liked to have B model for him, Aren liked to draw people, Beyond liked attention, it made both of them happy. These sketchbooks were hidden in the floorboards of his room and have pages missing from where Beyond ripped out all the pictures of himself after A died.

Aren had a lot of practical knowledge, but also wanted to kill himself during exam times and couldn't for the life of him figure out how to revise. Most of his high grades came from coursework and debates he had in lessons.

Swivel chairs were his favorite kind of chair, he always sat in one if he was actually working. In the library, he would be willing to start a fist fight as long as it meant he got the swivel chair.

He stopped trying to hide how much he hated everyone around a year before his death. A just really stopped caring. Because Gifted child burnout, I don't need to elaborate.

His love languages? BIG BIG BIG ACTS OF SERVICE KIND OF PERSON. If he likes you he will do things for you!! (Like bash a guys head in with a stick). For receiving love language wise... I feel like he likes company. He wants to know that they're there, that they won't abandon him, so I feel like Aren would be into quality time and words of affirmation.

A knew Jujutsu! He was a purple belt at it and would use it for self defense purposes.

Would slide down the staircase of the orphanage and nearly kick people if they were sat on the stairs. Many people would stick near the middle of the stairs because A would give absolutely no warning and just be coming down a massive staircase at high speed about to kick anyone within legs reach for the lols.

"B corrupted you!" "No I corrupted myself, B is my enabler I'll have you know." - Aren Cadmus, 1999

He had a complex about feeling not listened to. A felt like when he talked, nobody actually cared what he was saying and that he couldn't do anything about the way his life was. It was sad.

[ramenoff]

• 𝐜𝐡𝐚𝐦𝐩 •

Synopsis: Bucky would literally die for you but his ego is bigger than his dick and you wanna shove him out a window. 

Pairing: fuckboy!bucky x AFAB!reader (college au)

Warnings: uH enemies to lovers, no explicit smut (brief, inexplicit mentions), PINING OH MY GOD, unrequited love (on Bucky’s part), language, some specific traits for reader mentioned (nothing like skin, hair or eye colour, more just clothing style and no makeup), Bucky is an idiot lmao.

(1.3k words)

You’re staring at your board like you’ve got a bone to pick with it, determination evident in your brow and a scraped knee to match it. 

Should’ve bought those knee pads. 

You huff out a sigh and push off on your board once more before dipping back down into the bowl and rounding the circumference to get yourself comfortable. Your foot meets the ground to spur on your momentum- it’s a simple trick, and you’ve only been skating for around two weeks at this point but you’ve spent all afternoon trying to nail this move and you refuse to return to your dorm with defeat written all over you. 

You direct yourself to round another lap before allowing the board to take its course up the side of the bowl. You meet the edge and you use the momentum in your hips to let yourself rise up in the air and- holy shit, you’re almost doing it! 

As you meet the edge your body swivels, right hand gripping the board to your feet as your left-

Well, your left hand was supposed to catch you. 

Before you can calculate that the distance was misjudged, you're tumbling down the side of the bowl and biting the pavement. 

“Take it easy there, champ.” 

You’re so ready to castrate him. 

“Eat glass,” you snap, dusting off your cargo shorts and examining your twin wounds on your knees. 

You’ve never understood just what makes James Buchanan Barnes so great. It's clear that he’s a class A douchebag with his stupid blue eyes and ridiculous hair that falls perfectly in place no matter how hungover and disgusting he was. He swears he’s got a big dick but he’s proven that his ego has the advantage, even girls on campus swap stories about one night stands and seven minutes of god knows what when stuffed into a closet together on a dare. Maybe you’re jealous that it isn’t you, or maybe you’re just tired of the pick-me-girl shit that goes on simply for a college fuckboy with precisely two and a half brain cells who has somehow Pavolov’d a swath of young girls to be at his beck and call when he wants a blowjob. Either way, the rest of campus thinks that Bucky is just peachy while you can beg to differ. 

The best part? He wants you bad. 

Your bruised skin and scruffy attitude is refreshing, he’s decided. Not once has he been so threatened by a look but he’d be damned if he didn’t imagine those harsh features softening at his touch. He doesn’t care if it’s behind closed doors, where your back arches and your eyes roll, pleads and prayers dripping off your lips like honey as he plays your body like a finely tuned instrument. Nor if it’s out where everyone can see, a brush at the small of your back, just so you know he’s there. If he could just tuck away that flyaway strand of hair that always hangs in front of your eyes he’d die happy. If he’s lucky he might cup your cheeks and trace your lips with his thumb, trying to memorize the touch in case his body forgets. 

He thinks, if he could have you, that his body would never truly forget it. You’re too extraordinary. You’re extraterrestrial. He swears your beauty is so alien but also earthly and real, unlike anything else he’s ever seen. If God exists, he made the cosmos revolve around you. Bucky sometimes scrunches his nose and grimaces at how cheesy it sounds but he solidly believes that God took inspiration from your eyes and created stars. Your hair is the waterfalls of the world, the clouds in the sky and the leaves on the trees all at once. Your skin is the earth, lush and rich, but blemished from your pursuits. When your eyes narrow and your brow sets, so does the sun. When you breathe the wind wraps him in chilled kisses. He’d like to create a hurricane with you. 

He’s bad at showing it, but he’d give you everything. He’s made fun of you and taunted you out of his own insecurity, but only because he just knows he’d love you better than anyone else. When he teases you about your baggy, ripped clothes it’s because he wishes he could worship the prize that lies beneath them. When he points out your circled eyes and offers to take you makeup shopping it’s because he wants to kiss those dark crescent moons and adore them like the rest of you. He finds any opportunity to poke at your scars and scabs because he yearns to place a band-aid on them and kiss them. 

Champ? He calls you that for two reasons. 

1. He can’t get enough of that face you make when he does. Never has he wanted to drop to his knees to beg and throw you over his shoulder and feel you squirm at the same time. You look like you could commit all sorts of creative crimes when you look at him like that and it makes his heart swell morbidly. 

2. You are a champion- his champion. He wants so desperately to be proud of you, to watch you with adoring eyes and his face in his palms as you put everything surrounding you to shame. Roses? They pale in comparison to your skin’s natural glow. The jaws of death? They snap shut and whimper when you walk- no, skate- by. 

Bucky wants you more than he has ever wanted anything in his life- come to think of it, he hasn’t ever really wanted much in life. He just grazed the median to get into college by a longshot, never exactly cared for a job or any of the girls he dated in the past. Steve and Sam, while being his best friends, Bucky knows they won’t put up with his absolute dogshit behavior forever. But you? He’d change for you. He’d cut his hair or wear a clown suit if you really wanted him to, he would do anything if it meant making that tight line of concentration and grit that is your mouth curve up into a smile. 

What does he do instead? 

“You’re pretty shit at this,” he readjusts his ball cap as he peers down the bowl at you. 

You glare up at him. Your eyes are a myriad of labyrinths. He’s sure he’ll never find his way out of them but you break the gaze and kick up your board. 

“Not as shit as you in bed,” You quip, taking a run up the side of the bowl and making it up this time without trouble. 

Please, just let him hold you.

“Wouldn’t you like to find out.”

Even just for a minute.

“I’d like to keep my pink palace untainted, thank you.” 

You can count if you really can’t stand it. 

“Pink palace? You mean crackhouse.”

Just let him be selfish. He doesn’t deserve it, but hell does he want you. 

“And your junk is close to godliness?” you snort. 

You’re now nearly nose-to-nose. He can smell you- warm vanilla and sandalwood rolling off your body like waves of rugged sweetness and the sharp bite of spearmint gum on your breath. He could kiss you. He could just take you by the back of the neck and finally get that clash of lips, teeth and tongue that have haunted his dreams at night. Or he could guide your chin to his lips with the tips of his fingers, letting anticipation build with the riot of butterflies in his stomach. 

But no. 

“Maybe you’ll get that trick next time, champ,” Bucky claps a hand on your shoulder and is on his way with his heart sinking in his chest.