#like???? girl. you went EVERYWHERE and you picked. shane. REALLY?????

[fingertipsmp3]

Do you ever observe random people you went to high school with on your FB and you’re just like “you really went all around the world and still picked a boy from our hometown? Really?”

[yourgoldengirls]

Lonely

Pairing: Rick Grimes x F!Reader

Summary: After the fall of the prison, the reader finds herself alone with baby Judith mourning her family while trying to survive.

Warnings: angst, fluff

W/C: 3360

Ao3

A/N: Yes, I am writing this while there is a HUGE list of assignments that I am currently ignoring. Please enjoy my attempt of failing college. If you like it, please reblog and leave a comment. This is my first time writing fanfiction so I am open to criticism, but I am also a sucker for compliments. English is not my first language so if there is any mistakes please let me know.

--

She doesn’t remember ever feeling so lonely.

Of course, before all this she was always alone, living in her small apartment in the city and working in her cubicle.

But now, as she sits in an abandoned car in the middle of the desert road with the baby in her arms, she feels lonely.

Before, she didn’t know what was like to have a family, to care and rely on someone, to share your fears and joy and journey with people that care deeply about you.

So yes, before she was alone. But she wasn’t lonely. She wasn’t missing anything.

You can’t miss what you never had.

Now, while she is scare and hungry in the middle of the apocalypse holding an already asleep Judith, she feels lonely.

Now she misses her family.

She misses Carl’s laugh and jokes, and the way he would always come to her when he wanted to talk about his fears or when he wanted help to prank his father.

She misses Maggie and their late night talks in the guard tower while they were keeping watch (their apocalypse sleepover, as they like to call) when they would just pretend to be two friends in the normal world gossiping about the neighbors and boyfriends with Beth.

She misses Daryl and his shy demeanor, how he always would hunt for them even when they already had food enough as a way of showing he cares without having to say it.

She misses Glenn and his sweetness, the way he would always make sure she ate something before taking shifts clearing the fence. The way he took care of her as she was his little sister, since he found her in one of his runs back in Atlanta and toke her to the camp without questions.

She misses Michonne and her sass, they afternoon training and how she never lets anyone touch her katana but agreed in showing her how to use it.  

But most of all she misses Rick.

God, she misses him so much it hurts.

Their relationship was complicated at first.

Back in Atlanta, they became friends. When he showed up, she had already formed a strong bond with Carl, so it made sense she would also become close to his parents. Lori had always trusted her with Carl when she was not around (a.k.a in the woods screwing Shane) so the boy started seeing her as a source of comfort and protection.

When he was shot back in the farm, she was by his side every day, reading and playing games until he was strong enough to leave the room.

She held him when they found out about Sofia. Dried his tears when he cried at night. She was always with him while his parents were dealing with their broken marriage.

When they lost the farm and went back in the road, she would take care of him, giving him her food and coat at night. With Lori pregnant, Rick was always looking after her, giving her his food and making sure she and the baby wore the safest they could be in the apocalypse, with monsters everywhere, so she took upon her to worry about Carl.

Rick was constantly worried about the baby, starting to lose his mind trying to find a solution to keep everyone safe. But there is so much a man can do at the end of the world.  

So, one night when everybody was sleeping and he was up keeping watch, he broke down.

--

She was laying next to Carl, holding the boy, and trying to keep him warm the best she could. The others were already asleep, but she could never keep her eyes close these days. Always worried she would never open then again.

So when she heard sniffing noises she knew it was Rick, the only one awake besides her.

Carefully not to disturb the kid sleeping next to her, she stood up and when to sit next to him.

"Hey"

Rick look at her and gave her a small smile, too tired to try and hide his tears from her.

"Wanna talk about?"

He just kept looking at her and sigh. Looking at him up closely, she saw how exhausted he looked. He was thinner, his hair and beard were longer, and his eyes had dark circles around. She knew she didn’t look much better.

"I’m scared." he whispered so quietly that if she weren’t so close, she wouldn’t be able to hear it. "Everybody is counting on me and I just.. I don’t know what to do. I’m disappointing everyone."

In that moment she looked at him and she swore he never locked so small. So unsure of himself. The strong and forceful leader of the group was nowhere to be seen.

"Hey, that’s not true. We all know that you are doing your best." she told him, eager to comfort him, to take him away from those demons that was starting to craw up on his shoulders.

"What do you do when your best is not good enough?" he asks her looking so lost, hoping that she had the answers to all his questions and could fix him somehow.

She then took his wands and forced him to turn and face her, to look her in the eyes, hoping that what she had to say next could penetrate his skin and comfort him best if he had all his attention fixed on her.

"We are going to be okay, Rick. As long as we are together, we are going to be okay. We’re going to figure it out. I promise."

He just looked at her and smile, squeezing her hand but didn’t let go.

"Plus, you are going to have another baby soon. Can’t go around losing all hope now, right?  If anything, we have to try harder." she tries to bring his mind in something to look forward to, something to keep going.

"Is not my baby." he says and she is more confuse than ever.

"What?"

"Is Shane’s baby." he says and his voice is so small that she thinks that she heard wrong, but the look in his face tells her she didn’t.

"Oh, Rick.."

She then takes his face in her hands and he cries harder, letting his face fall to her shoulders while she holds him.

She holds him until his tears dry, then his head movers from her shoulders to her lap and he closes his eyes while she plays with his hair until he falls asleep.

They found the prison two days later and he hugged her so hard she thought her ribs were going to break.

--

After that night, they became closer and closer. Like Carl, he starts to look for her when in need of comfort and reassurance. They would be constantly talking and making plans for update the prison, going on runs together and always having each other’s backs.

When Lori died giving birth, she didn’t allow herself to cry. The moment Maggie show up with the baby in her arms and Carl with that devastated look in his face, she knew she had to be strong for them. The tree of them.

So while Rick was grieving, she was taking care of his kids. Judith would be in her arms constantly and Carl was always on her toes. She notices that the boy was trying to hold back in front of everyone, so at night she would always bring the kids to her cell and hold a crying Carl while Judith was sleeping.

When Rick showed up looking like himself again, he came to her while she was feeding Judith. He sat besides her and watched the baby girl like she was some sort of angel in the middle of a battlefield. Too pure for this world. He then looked at her and she smiled at him and told him that it was going to be okay.

And he believed her.

After that it was natural that they would gravitate towards each other. She was taking care of his kids after all, and he was so lost that it was disorientating. The whole world was a blur, and she was the only thing keeping him grounded. She became his rock.

Every time he saw her talking with Carl, making sure he was eating, playing with him in at attempt of bringing him some sort of childhood, he felt like he could breath again. When she was holding Judith, feeding, and singing to her, he felt the ache in his chest decreasing.

Every time she would hug him, smile at him, or do anything as looking at his direction, he felt like she was the only thing holding his head above water, the only thing keeping him from drowning.

Piece by piece she collected him.

So it wasn’t a surprise when one day their hugs started to last longer, when the kisses on the cheek moved closer and closer to the mouth, when the gazes became silent conversations.

Everyone notice they pinning around each other but they knew that it was all that was going to be. Both too afraid and feeling too guilty to act on whatever was going on between them.

They needed to take things slow. It wasn’t fair to any of them to jump into something so soon after Lori’s death. It wasn’t fair to Lori, Rick, Carl. It wasn’t fair to her. So they needed time.

But that’s the thing with living in the end of the world. Time is a luxury. A privilege that you can’t really count on.

When the prison fell the only thing in her mind wore the kids. She couldn’t remember who had Judith, where Carl was, she couldn’t find anybody. She was starting to panic when she saw Judith placed on the baby chair on the floor, seconds from being eaten by a walker.

She quickly picked her up and ren as fast as she could. She ren so much until her legs started to give up. She didn’t have time to think about anything else. She just had to take her out of there.

Now she doesn’t know where she is. She doesn’t know how long is been since she left the prison. She doesn’t know if anybody else is alive, and if they are, she knew she will never find them again. She is scare and have no idea how she is gonna keep her and Judith safe.

Up until this moment, she been living from fruits and some cans she found in some abandoned cabins she crossed along the way. But she is getting weaker. She can’t really hunt without a proper weapon and a baby in her arms. She tried going in the city to scavenge some stores for food to Judith, but she was only able to collect a few things before the baby started crying and attracted walkers from every ware. After that she gave up on that idea and started looking for some place safe enough to spend a few days so she and Judith could have a proper rest.

She never allows herself to sleep when she stops to rest, afraid to wake up surrounded by walkers. So when Judith wakes up, she feeds her with the formula that is left and starts walking again. At this point she doesn’t even feel the pain in her legs anymore, is like her body is moving by himself, she is numb.

Judith seems to understand that something is wrong, never complaining, even when she is tired of being carried all the time, and when she is hungry she just pulls her hair, seeming to understand that making noises is too dangerous. Being a baby born in this world, Judith sems to have a different way of behaving that any other babies that she was ever seen. She is still to young to speak, but she makes the cute little noises as if she were trying to communicate, making the woman smile every time and pretend that she is understanding every “word”.

She is immersed in one of her conversations with Judith when she sees the sign. Stopping suddenly, she reads again and again, as if the words would change the minute she looked away and it would be all a projection of her imagination.

But it wasn’t.

So she starts running.

Even though she has her doubts about the existence of an actual sanctuary in this new world, she must check. Is the only scrum of hope after so long. And even if the said sanctuary exists, there is no guaranty that is run by good people. At this point, she has already learned to not trust the living.

So as she starts to get closer and closer to Terminus, she slows her pace not to dry attention before she has the opportunity to check the place.

But then suddenly there is an explosion and gun shots.

She holds Judith closer and tries to hide in a place that allows her to see what is happening but there is too much smoke, so she decides to stay there until is over. Even if there are good people in this place, there is not much help she can provide in this situation with a baby in her arms, and no gun. So she waits and waits until there is no more gun shots.

Judith is surprisingly calm during all this, so she decides is safe to get out of the hidden place and try to see what is going on. All kinds of things go though her mind as she walks towards a little commotion of people walking in direction of the woods, away from Terminus. She is mostly scare of crossing the way of bad people, but she has to see, the seed of hope never living her chest as she goes in direction of the first group of people that she encountered since the fall of the prison.

Maybe they are good people. Maybe they will welcome the lonely woman with the baby in her arms and offer her a place in their group. It will never be the same as being with her group, her family, but at least she would be safe, Judith would be safe.

Or maybe they are awful people and she is about to face another nightmare, another demonstration of what hell is like in the hands of the living, and all hope will be crushed again in front of her eyes.

Of all the things passing trough her mind, finding her family was definitely not one of them. Not once she thought that they wore alive and she would see them again.

At first, she thought that she was seeing things, maybe she was delirious. After all, how long can a person live without enough among of water, food and sleep and still expect to have a healthy function mind? She was going insane, that was definitely it.

But then she saw Daryl running towards Carol and everyone’s faces of surprise and relief and there was no way her mind could create that. Daryl running to hug someone? Not even her delirious mind could made that up.

She stood there paralyzed, trying to ground herself into believing that this was actually her family standing in front of her, when Judith cries draws everyone’s attention to her.

Next thing she knew Rick was running in her direction with Carl in his toes and she was being engulfed with the tightest hug she ever received in her life. Suddenly she was overwhelmed with all kinds of emotions and everything around her was Rick. The smells, the touches, she couldn’t see or think about anything that wasn’t him. After so many days, weeks (was it months? She stop counting so long ago) without knowing if he was dead, alive or something in between, she didn’t know which emotion was stronger. Relief, joy, surprise, love?

When Carl join them in the hug, she starts crying and they all fall to their knees on the ground. It was too much. Knowing that both kids were safe and in her arms was more than she could ever wish for. Her main goal during all this was to keep them safe, and to spend all this time in the road thinking that she had failed, that Carl was gone and she didn’t do anything about it was killing her more quickly than the lack of food or water ever could. Knowing now that he was alive was like receiving a tank of oxygen deep in the ocean, she could suddenly breath again.

When Rick pull back to look in her eyes her smile couldn’t be brighter.

"Sweetheart, is that you? Is it really you?"

When did she became sweetheart?  

He starts to caress her face and kiss her tears away with such tenderness that she starts crying even harder. He then smiles and takes Judith of her arms as Carl takes his place, hugging her like she was the last parachute in a plane crash.

"Oh, my baby.. I thought I lost you." she says in the most maternally way there is, while caressing the boy’s hair. "You are never leaving my side again."

The boy then laughs, and her smile grows because oh, how she missed that laugh, and everything falls into place.

"Yes, ma’am." the boy says full of joy and hints of laughs on his smile. "I missed you."

"I missed you too, honey." she says. "So very much."

They get up when the rest of the group starts to approach them, each member with smiles bigger than their faces, hugging her tighter than ever before.

Then Carl take Judith in his arms and Rick starts walking towards her again, holding her face with both hands and pressing their foreheads together. He closes his eyes and smiles before pressing a kiss in her lips and she is suddenly seeing stars.

Nothing could prepare her for this moment, not every novel she once read or the songs she used to listen. There was not one thing that was ever written about love that could describe this feeling. She wasn’t even sure if she could call it love.

It was stronger.

It was the kind of thing that would get you through anything, this feeling was the most powerful thing on earth, she was sure of that. With their mouths pressed against each other, she was sure that the only thing allowing her to breath was his lungs and his blood was only circling in his body due to her heartbeat.

They were one soul in two bodies.

She entangles her fingers in his messy hair and smiles in the middle on the kiss, making him smile as well as they break the kiss.

"I can’t believe this is real. You are here, and.. and Judith is here." he then looks at her with so much admiration in his eyes that she feels shy all the sudden. "You kept my daughter safe."

"Of course I did." she’s mine too.

"I guess I should have known." he than laughs. "You’ve been protecting my kids since day one. You are like the mama bear of the apocalypse."

She than laughs and shoves him playfully.

"I am not!"

"You are, you totally are." they laugh together as she shakes her head.

"He’s right, you totally are." Carl says and she is suddenly remained that they are not alone, and that he saw her kissing his father. But she doesn’t have time to be afraid of what he might think because when she looks at him, he has the biggest smile on his face.

Rick then takes her hand and kisses her knuckles; love is his eyes and she know that her face must mirror his.

"What now?" she asks him.

"Now.. we survive."

In that moment she knows she will never fell lonely again. She found her family, her kids, her love. She was home.

[siancore]

Summary:  Rick did not like shopping at the best of times. He was happy to shop online. With just a few clicks, everything he needed was paid for, shipped, and delivered to the letterbox in his college dorm. He avoided a bunch of fellow shoppers, didn’t have to worry about finding parking, and did not get distracted with things he shouldn’t want or couldn’t really afford. Yes, Rick did not like shopping, especially during the holiday season. That is until he needs to buy something for his mama and meets a young woman who works in a giftshop.

A/N: Richonne Christmas AU one-shot. All feel-good fluff

Word: 3,788

Rick did not like shopping at the best of times. He was happy to shop online. With just a few clicks, everything he needed was paid for, shipped, and delivered to the letterbox in his college dorm. He avoided a bunch of fellow shoppers, didn’t have to worry about finding parking, and did not get distracted with things he shouldn’t want or couldn’t really afford. Yes, Rick did not like shopping, especially during the holiday season. Luckily, his friends Morgan and Shane went with him for moral support when he needed to choose a gift for his mama.

The sound of Mariah Carey’s voice coming through the speakers of the PA system in the mall wafted around the friends as they walked beside one another. Christmas garlands with lights hung overhead, and there seemed to be a plastic, decorated tree in every shop window they passed. People were everywhere, trying to find the perfect gifts for loved ones. Rick wouldn’t really say it was last minute shopping, as it was the first week in December. Normally, he would leave gift shopping until a week or so before Christmas, but wanted to get it over and done with sooner this year.

Shane nudged Rick’s shoulder and then pointed toward a novelty gift store that looked like it sold everything from those tuxedo t-shirts to marijuana paraphernalia.

“There,” he said, wearing a wide grin. “Bound to find something in there for your mama.”

Rick and Morgan shared a look that was somewhere in the middle of disbelief and disgust.

“Nope,” said Morgan.

“Nuh ah,” Rick added. “I’m not gettin’ my mama one of those bikini t-shirts or a bong.”

“Why not?” asked Shane, still smiling.

Rick rolled his eyes and shook his head.

“The fact that you even have to ask me that makes me question why we’re friends,” said Rick with no malice behind his words. Shane just laughed and clapped a hand to his shoulder.

“You’ve been stuck with me since third grade, asshole,” Shane replied. “Now, if y’all are too good to come in that store with me, there’s a classy lookin’ place over there. Let’s meet up in the food court at that burger joint you like.”

“Thirty minutes?” asked Morgan, checking the time on his phone.

“Alright,” Rick replied. “Sounds good.”

The three friends nodded to one another and then went their separate ways: Shane to the novelty gift store, Morgan to a quaint little hole-in-the-wall bookshop, and Rick to the classy lookin’ place.

…..

One of the reasons Rick disliked shopping in public was that there was so much choice. He ended up overthinking most of the time. When the well-meaning staff asked if he needed any help, he normally gave a polite smile and told them no thanks. This time, however, he could probably use the help. The little shop had a wide variety of really nice gifts ranging from silverware to delicate looking jewelry boxes. Any one of the items would be appreciated and cherished by his mother. Rick was almost hesitant to touch anything because it all looked so pretty and nice. He wandered over to where the little glass figurines stood on a glass shelf. There were tiny little people, cars, monuments, and animals.

Rick’s eyes settled on a cute looking puppy figurine. His mama loved dogs. She would love the small glass one.  Carefully, Rick picked it up and placed it in the palm of his hand so that he could examine it more closely. It was very nice. Yes. His mama would like it. Smiling to himself, Rick made his way to the counter to purchase the figurine. He was met by a friendly looking older lady.

“Found something?” she asked with a warm smile.

“Yes, ma’am,” Rick replied as he placed the little puppy down on the counter.

“Ooh, these are really lovely,” she proffered as she searched around for the blue box that the item came with. “I have a bunch of them myself.”

“I like it,” Rick found himself saying. “Hope my mama likes it, too.”

“A gift for your mama? What a lovely boy you are. She’s gonna love it.”

Rick smiled and nodded his head as the lady continued speaking.

“Now, this box is fine and all, but we have a gift-wrapping service here, and it’s free for the whole month of December,” she explained. “Would you like it wrapped up all nice for your mama?”

“Yes, ma’am, that sounds really good.”

She gave Rick a smile and then said, “Alright, I won’t be a minute.”

The lady then walked to the curtain that covered a doorway that led to the back of the store and called out, “Michonne? Honey? Got a customer who needs somethin’ wrapped up.”

She returned to where Rick was standing and said, “If you wait at the end of the counter there, we’ll have our gift wrapper fix you up.”

Rick nodded, smiled, and said, “Thank you, ma’am.”

He then made his way to the end of the counter with the little box in his hand. He was busy looking out the shopfront window when his attention was drawn by a sweet-sounding voice. Rick turned his head and he swore his breath caught in his throat when his eyes fell on the young lady standing before him. He was certain he was staring, with his jaw on the floor, because she repeated her question.

“You needed something wrapped?”

Rick needed to look at her lips to make sure he understood what she was saying because, holy shit, she was stunning. She had the prettiest brown eyes Rick had ever seen. Her hair was pulled away from her face in a chignon. Her smile was so bright that it was blinding. Rick was awestruck.

“Sorry, yeah, yes. I uh, I’d like this wrapped, please,” he stammered, mentally chiding himself for not being smooth in front of the pretty girl.

He placed the box down on the counter and managed to smile at her. She smiled back at him and he swore his knees felt weak.

“Is it for a he, she, or they?”

“Pardon me?” asked Rick, still not able to function properly.

“Not that it actually matters,” she replied amicably. “But some customers choose wrapping paper based on if the gift is for a guy or a girl, so I have to ask.”

“Oh, yeah. Okay,” said Rick, while rubbing the back of his neck with his hand. “It don’t matter to me. I mean, it’s for a lady, but anything is fine.”

Rick glanced down at the nametag on her lapel, which read Michonne. A pretty name for a pretty woman, he mused, tempted to say her name out loud to see how it felt on his lips. He was drawn from his reverie by Michonne asking, “Is it a Christmas gift?”

“Yes, a Christmas gift,” he replied, kicking himself for malfunctioning in front of gorgeous Michonne.

“Awesome,” she replied with that brilliant smile. “I have some really nice Christmas wrapping here. Do you want foil or paper?”

“Umm, paper?”

“Great choice,” she replied as she reached under the counter and got out a few items: Three rolls of wrapping paper, a pair of scissors, and a roll of cello tape. “Which do you prefer?”

Rick had to force his gaze away from Michonne to look down at the choices. There was a roll of paper with multi-colored stars, one with tiny Santas, and the other with snowflakes all over it. The snowflakes one was the nicest, but he knew his mama would think the Santa one was adorable. He chose the Santa paper.

“Great,” said Michonne. “I really like this one. It’s super cute.”

“Yeah,” said Rick as he watched Michonne get to work.

Her long, elegant fingers made it look so easy as she cut through the paper, placed the box on it, and then began to fold the wrapping around the gift. She was done way too quickly. Rick wanted to stand there and watch her for hours.

Yeah, creepy, Grimes, he chided himself.

“Thanks, that, uh, that looks great. You make it look easy. You’re really good.”

“Thanks, it’s just a lot of practice,” she replied, somewhat coyly. “Did you want a ribbon or a bow?”

“Yeah, thanks. A bow would be nice.”

“Alright, any preference?”

“A gold one?”

“A gold one it is,” Michonne replied with another grin, before placing a small golden bow in the center of the wrapped box. “Did you need a bag?”

“Yes, please, that’d be great,” said Rick as Michonne placed the box carefully into a small, paper bag.

She held the bag out to Rick and their fingers brushed against one another slightly. Rick thought he was going to pass out.

“Thank you,” he said, still standing there.

“You’re welcome,” she replied with a beautiful beam. “Happy holidays.”

“Oh, thanks. Yeah, you too. I mean happy holidays to you, too.”

They both stood there smiling bashfully at one another until another customer cleared their throat behind Rick.

“Umm, thanks again.”

“No problem,” said Michonne. “Enjoy the rest of your day.”

“You too,” he said as he finally began to walk away. “Bye.”

…..

Now, Rick wasn’t a weirdo creep or anything like that, but he was a little smitten. He could not stop thinking about Michonne from the giftshop. He may or may not have went back to the mall and walked by the shop to see if she was there. They may or may not have caught one another’s eye and proffered friendly smiles. He may or may not be a crushing hard on the young woman.

A week after first meeting Michonne, Rick found himself back in the giftshop. He was pretending to be looking at the small jewelry boxes while stealing glances at Michonne. It was ridiculous, really. He was a broke college student who had already chosen the perfect gift for his mother. He didn’t even like shopping. He had no business being back in the shop. He was about to leave when Michonne finished up with the customer, and their eyes met.

Shit, he thought. Have to buy something, now.

He picked up the least expensive jewelry box and made his way to the checkout. He paid the same older lady from the previous week, and then took the boxed item to the end of the counter for Michonne to wrap.

“Hey, back again,” she greeted with her dazzling smile that made Rick feel all gooey inside.

“Hey, yeah, so much great stuff here,” he proffered, much more smoothly and confidently than he had been the first time they met.

“What’d you get?” she asked, causing him to stand up a little straighter. She wanted to have a conversation, he realized, and he was beyond happy.

“One of those little jewelry boxes,” he explained.

“Oh, yeah. For the rings.”

“Yeah, a ring box.”

“They’re really pretty.”

So are you, he thought.

“Yeah, they’re real nice.”

“Pretty paper for a pretty gift?” she asked warmly.

“Yeah, sure. That’d be good. You choose.”

“Alright, well, let’s go with this silver foil wrapping,” Michonne said as she took out what she needed.

“Okay, looks nice,” Rick said, wanting to keep talking to her while she worked. “You, uh, you got all of your Christmas shopping done? I mean, if you celebrate Christmas. Sorry, I shouldn’t assume everyone celebrates this particular holiday. That’s just inconsiderate on my part. I shouldn’t go around assuming things –”

“Hey, it’s okay. It’s fine,” she said with a little chuckle that settled into Rick’s chest and made him feel warm all over. “I do celebrate Christmas, and I actually did all of my shopping online back in September.”

“That’s smart,” said Rick, reining his nerves back in. “I left it late this year.”

Michonne nodded her head. The gift was wrapped, and she was placing a little red bow on top of it.

“Is this the last of your shopping?” she asked, reaching for a paper bag.

“Umm, maybe? I don’t know.”

“Well, whoever this is for is a very lucky person.”

Rick smiled at Michonne and took the bag from her hand.

“Thanks,” he said as he slowly moved away so the next customer could be served. “I’ll see you around.”

“Yeah, I hope so,” she replied.

…..

He was going to do it. He was going to go the mall, make his way over to the giftshop, and ask Michonne out on a date. If he was lucky, he mused, she would say yes and they would go get coffee, or whatever she liked to drink, and he would charm her, and they’d have an amazing time, and then they’d fall in love and have a cute story to tell their grandbabies. He was going to do it. He was. He walked into the giftshop and Michonne wasn’t at her workstation. Rick sighed and decided to browse a little in the hopes that he would see Michonne sooner rather than later. When she wasn’t at the counter after five or so minutes, he was about to leave when another staff member approached him.

“Can I help you with anything, sir?” the teenaged boy asked.

“Hey, no thank you, I’m just browsing –”

Just then, Michonne came from the back of the shop and went to her spot at the end of the counter. A line of customers formed, and more were entering the shop, and Rick saw his chance at speaking with Michonne slipping away.

“Actually, I might get these,” said Rick, pointing to a box of six silver-plated, embossed coasters that were probably out of his price range.

“Great choice,” said the boy as he took the coasters from the shelf. “Let me ring it up for you.”

…

As the line grew shorter, and Rick got closer, he felt his resolve falling away. This was actually ridiculous. He was there spending money he couldn’t afford to be spending so that he could talk to a pretty girl? Ridiculous.

“Hey, so you’re still shopping?” Michonne asked with sweet smile.

“Hi,” said Rick with a bashful smile. “Yeah, just a few more things.”

He placed the coasters down on the counter and Michonne glanced down at them.

“These are really lovely,” she said before meeting Rick’s eyes with her own. “Any preference for wrapping?”

“Nah, I trust you,” said Rick, causing her to beam more brightly.

“Aww, so sweet,” Michonne replied before she began her work.

He watched her graceful hands as she cut a gorgeous square of paper and placed the item in the middle of it. She then cut a piece of red ribbon and sat the paper over it. Rick looked on as Michonne carefully and skilfully folded the paper and bound it together with the ribbon which she then tied in a bow on top. It was perfect. She didn’t need to use tape to hold it all together.

“You’re so good at that,” Rick complimented her again.

“You always say that,” Michonne replied. “But thank you. Hey, did you want to add a gift tag?”

“Yeah, that sounds good,” Rick replied, eager to spend more time with Michonne.

“Cool, let me just grab one for you,” she said, fishing out a brown tag from under the counter. She took a pen out of her pocket and then asked, “Who do I address it to?”

“Oh, umm. It’s for, ah, Sheila. It’s for Sheila,” said Rick, not really thinking about who the gift was for, since he hadn’t planned on even purchasing it to begin with. He went with his mother’s name.

Michonne nodded and then wrote Sheila in beautiful cursive on the small tag.

“And it’s from?”

“Rick. It’s from Rick. That’s me. I’m Rick.”

“Rick,” she said, and he swore hearing his name on her lips damn near made him ascend. “There you go, Rick.”

“Thank you, ah –”

“Michonne,” she said. “I’m Michonne. Nice to finally be properly introduced.”

“Yeah, it’s nice. Thank you, Michonne.”

Wow, it feels great to say her name out loud, he thought before smiling at her.

“You’re welcome, Rick,” she replied as she handed him the bag with the gift in it.

…..

“Rick? I need to borrow some drawers, man,” Shane called out as he walked into Rick’s bedroom and made a beeline to the tallboy.

“You don’t have any clean underwear?” asked Rick, as he glanced up from where he was sitting on his bed reading one of his textbooks.

“Nope, that’s why I need to borrow yours,” said Shane as he dug through the bottom drawer. “I’ll get ‘em back to you ASAP.”

“Ugh, no thanks. Keep ‘em.”

“Hey, man, what’s all o’ these?” asked Shane as he pointed to the gifts sitting atop the tallboy. “Hope you didn’t go buyin’ me anything.”

“They’re not for you.”

“Who’re they for then?”

“No one.”

“No one?” asked Shane dubiously as he picked one up and read the tag. “Sheila? As in your mama? You dumb enough to call her by her first name?”

“What? No. They’re not for mama. They’re just. I don’t know. It’s stupid.”

“Rick, you’re not makin’ a lick of sense. You wanna explain?”

Rick let out a sigh and then pinched the bridge of his nose.

“It’s stupid,” he repeated. “There’s this girl.”

“A girl named Sheila? You goin’ with some girl with the same name as your ma? That’s weird.”

“No, dumbass, there’s no girl named Sheila. Her name’s Michonne. I met her a few weeks ago. And she’s somethin’ else. I’m tellin’ you, man, she’s so gorgeous and sweet. And I’ve been meaning to ask her out, been buildin’ up to it, but I haven’t and I want to.”

“Okay, well, that’s cool, but what’s she got to do with all o’ these gifts? You gonna give ‘em to some girl you ain’t even asked out yet?”

“No, it’s not that,” said Rick as he took a deep breath. “She works at the classy lil’ giftshop I went to the other week. I got my mama’s gift from there, and Michonne wrapped it for me. I took one look at her and I was so gone on her.”

“Hold up. Hold up. So, you’re tellin’ me you’ve been goin’ back to the shop, buyin’ shit, and gettin’ this pretty girl to wrap them for you? Shit you don’t need, and probably can’t afford? Just so you can stand in front of this chick and not ask her out? And you’re callin’ me a dumbass?”

“Yeah, pretty much.”

Shane shook his head and then burst out laughing.

“Damn.”

“Yeah.”

“Get your ass down there and ask the girl out, Rick. Before you buy the whole goddamn store out you dumbass.”

…..

Shane was right, Rick was a dumbass because he was standing in front of Michonne with a little cat statue that she was calling gorgeous while trying to figure out how to wrap it. She sat it on some foil, drew it up around the figurine, and then tired it with ribbon at the top. It looked great.

“Sheila’s very lucky,” said Michonne as she placed it carefully into the bag filled with tissue paper.

“Sorry?” asked Rick, too distracted by the words running through his mind.

“Sheila, your girlfriend,” said Michonne, looking slightly deflated as she said the words. “She’s super lucky to have a boyfriend like you getting her all of these amazing gifts.”

Rick pressed his palm to his face. Yes, he was a dumbass.

“Oh, no, no. Sheila’s not my girlfriend. It’s my mama’s name.”

“You call your mom by her first name?”

“No, I don’t. I ah – shit. I’m sorry. It’s – damn it, let me explain. Do you go on a break soon, or?”

“Umm, yeah. Ten minutes or so. Why?” asked Michonne, with a questioning look on her face.

“Would you like to get some coffee with me?”

“Coffee? Like a coffee date?”

“Yes.”

“What about your girlfriend who you’ve been buying all the gifts for?”

“I don’t have a girlfriend,” Rick explained. “I don’t even have anyone to be buyin’ all of these nice things for. Truth is, I’ve been comin’ in here trying to work up the nerve to ask you out.”

“Really?”

“Yes, Michonne, really,” he said gently. “I just wanna buy you a coffee. Or just spend some time with you. Would you wanna do that? Would you wanna spend some time with me?”

Michonne narrowed her eyes a little as she contemplated Rick’s request.

“Yeah, sure,” she said with a smile. “I’d like that.”

…..

Christmas day in the not too distant future…

“Dad, I love it, thank you so much,” said Carl as he smiled down at the gift that his father had given him.

“You’re welcome, sweetheart,” said Rick with a warm smile.

“I can’t open this,” said Judith as she tried to untie the intricate ribbon.

“Give it here, honey,” said Sheila as she reached out her hands. “Let grandma help you with that.”

The small girl handed the gift over and leaned against the old woman’s chair.

“Why don’t you check the stockings,” said Rick to his daughter.

“Oh yeah, I nearly forgot,” said Judith as she made her way to where the stockings were hanging over the disused fireplace at Sheila’s home. Her gaze landed on the little glass ornaments sitting atop the mantlepiece. One little glass puppy, and a cat statue sitting next to some coasters and a ring box. “Grandma, these are so cute. Where’d you get them?”

“Those were a Christmas gift from your daddy. They’re very special to me,” Sheila said with a fond smile.

“They’re special to me, too,” said Rick, as Michonne, André and R.J. came back into the living room with a tray of steaming beverages. She set it down on the coffee table and took up a seat next to her husband.

“We got hot chocolate,” said R.J. excitedly.

“And marshmallows,” André added.

“Thank you, my babies,” said Rick with a loving smile.

“Why?” asked Judith, ever the inquisitive child.

“Sorry, honey?” asked Rick.

“Why’re they special to you?”

“Because,” said Rick, as he turned to Michonne and pressed a kiss to her cheek. “If I didn’t go shopping for them, me and your mama might not have met.”

Michonne took hold of Rick’s hand and leaned in to kiss his lips.

“Well,” said Judith as she watched her parents stare lovingly at one another. “That means that they’re special to our whole family.”

“That’s true,” said Michonne as she leaned her head on Rick’s shoulder. “But you know what’s even more special?”

“What?”

“Our family,” Michonne replied happily. “Merry Christmas, Team Grimes.”

[fangirlwriting-stories]

Reflecting Light

Chapter One

Chapter Seven:

Roman was pretty sure flying was something he wasn’t going to get sick of anytime soon.  How could anyone get sick of looking so far into the horizon?  They flew for a couple days before Shane told him they had to land and investigate this town and restock, and Roman absolutely adored every second of it.  He got up every morning and got to watch the sunrise with no obstacles in his way.  He got to see more constellations at night than he ever had before, which he was absolutely bragging to Logan about later.  He could stand near the front of the ship and feel the wind on his face.  Shane was clearly amused by the way that it all amazed Roman, but it was too wonderful an experience for Roman to really be bothered by it.

When they finally landed for the first time it was in a town that Janus Picani apparently stopped often in.  Shane was docking the ship when Roman decided to bring up what he was thinking about.  He headed over to stand behind Shane.  “Sir?” he asked hesitantly.

“Roman, if you call me sir for the next two months I’m going to lose my mind,” Shane said as he glanced backwards.  “Just use my name for now.”

“Okay, Shane,” Roman said, even more hesitantly.  “I don’t think we should wear our Light uniforms while we ask for information.”

Shane gave him a suspicious look, and Roman took a step back.  “Why would we do that?”

“Well, um,” Roman put his hands behind his back so he could fidget as he spoke.  “When we first left no one was being very cooperative until I covered the Light symbol on my shirt with Patton’s hoodie.  I think people might be more willing to help if we didn’t tell them we’re from The Light.”

Shane gave him a look like he was being an idiot.  “There’s a Light insignia on the side of the ship, Roman.  Anyone who sees us stepping off is going to see we’re from The Light.”

“Well, yeah, but the people in town—”

“Roman, if you want to wear a cat hoodie everywhere, you be my guest.  I intend to have a little pride in the place where I’m from.”

“Oh, that’s not exactly what I meant.”

“We don’t have all morning to argue anyway, Roman.” Shane finished docking the boat and turned around.  “I’ll ask around here at the docks.  You can go talk to people in town.  We’ll cover more ground that way.  Can you be back here in a couple hours?”

Roman nodded.  “I can do that.”

“Excellent.  I’ll see you then.”

Roman grabbed his cat hoodie from his bag and slipped it on as he walked away from the ship.  He headed into the town, waving back to a couple people who waved to him.  One young child came up to him and happily told him she liked his cat hoodie.

“Thank you,” Roman said, smiling brightly at her.

“Sweety, we don’t bother strangers,” said a woman who must have been the girl’s mother, as she walked up to her.

“Oh, she’s fine,” Roman said, waving off her concerns.  “This hoodie belongs to a dear friend of mine, he made it himself and I’m using it while I’m traveling.  Here, I could write down a list of the materials he used.”  Roman pulled out a notebook and wrote down what Patton had used to make the hoodie, and handed it to the girl’s mother.

“Thank you,” she said with a smile.  “My husband is excellent at making clothes, I’m sure this would be no trouble for him.”

“I get a cat hoodie?” the little girl exclaimed happily.  “Thank you, mister!”  She threw herself around Roman’s leg, and he laughed.

“It’s not a problem at all,” he said, ruffling her hair.  “I would stay and try to help make it, but unfortunately I’m on a bit of a desperate journey at the moment.  I’m looking for my brother.  We’re identical twins, so he looks just like me.  He’s also traveling with Janus and Virgil Picani.”

“Oh, you should ask Remy then,” the woman said, pointing across the street.  “They delivered to his shop about a week ago.  And I highly recommend his Coffee.  He finally got it to work.”

“I wanna try his Coffee!” the little girl complained.

“He says it’s not for kids, sweetheart,” the woman said, patting her child on the shoulder.  “Good luck on catching up with your brother.”

“Thank you.  I hope your husband does well with that hoodie!” Roman called, waving as the two walked away and heading towards the shop across the street.

A bell jingled over the door as Roman opened it, and a man at the counter glanced up.  “Hey babes, what can I help you— oh.  What are you doing back here, Remus?”

“You’ve seen him?” Roman said, brightening.  “Oh, sorry, that was weird.  Remus is my twin brother.”

The man, who must have been Remy, nodded in understanding.  “Oh, gotcha.  Oh, I see it now, no mustache.”

“Yeah.  Thanks,” Roman muttered, resisting the urge to rub at the spot over his lip.  That had always bugged him.  Why did only Remus get a mustache, they were identical twins.  “Do you know which direction he went?  I’m trying to find him.”

“He left without telling you?” Remy asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yeah, uh.  He was in trouble,” Roman said.  “Someone back home was threatening him.  I’m trying to find him because the problem’s been taken care of now.”

Remy nodded slightly.  “Yeesh.  No wonder he had that panic attack.  Babe’s gotta be under a ton of stress.”

Roman’s mouth went dry.  “What happened?” he asked.

“Oh shoot, you probably didn’t know that,” Remy said, laughing a little awkwardly.  “Yeah, that happened.  Don’t worry, he’s fine.  Virgil and Janus showed up after like a minute.  Good thing too, I had no clue what to do.  Hey, while you’re here, you want some Coffee—”

“Do you know which way they went?” Roman asked hurriedly.

Remy gave him a confused look.  “Yeah.  They’re making their rounds?  I think they’re coming back here in three months or so with more supplies for my Coffee.  Oh, and weapons I guess.”

“I don’t have three months,” Roman said, still a little stuck on the panic attack part.  Virgil and Janus showed up.  Roman wasn’t sure what that meant exactly, but Remus could be hard to deal with during panic attacks.  And if he was being kept prisoner, Janus and Virgil the rebellion members probably didn’t care too much about that.  Was this Remy person really so heartless that he wouldn’t care what they did as long as they took Remus away?  Why the hell did everyone hate people from The Light so much?  “I need to find him as quickly as possible.”

“Well, I don’t know what to tell you,” Remy said with a shrug.  “You can follow their travel route.  Do you want to buy some Coffee or not?”

Roman sighed.  “Alright,” he said.  “I’ll try some Coffee.”

Remy smiled brightly and walked into a back room, likely to get whatever the hell Coffee was.  He came back out a second later with a mug of some kind of dark liquid and passed it over to Roman.  “First try is free,” he said.  “Every following cup is ten each.”

Roman took a moment to consider how full of himself that made Remy sound as he picked up the mug and took a sip.

He immediately pulled back.  “Fuck that’s bitter,” he said.

“Yeah, I know.  I’m debating adding sugar.  But the drink should wake you up.  Give it a couple minutes.”

“Uh-huh,” Roman said, taking another drink just to avoid pissing Remy off.  He drank a couple more mouthfuls, which was about all he could stand, before he passed the cup back to Remy with a thanks for the drink and his help, as if either were particularly valuable.  At least he knew Remus had been here.

He pulled off his cat hoodie once he arrived back at the docks.  Shane was waiting over by the boat, and stood up from where he was leaning against a crate as Roman approached.

“Roman, finally.  Help me load these crates on board.”

“Sorry, this shopkeeper wanted me to try his shitty drink,” Roman said, wrinkling his nose.  “It was so incredibly bitter, I do not recommend it.”

“Noted,” Shane said, raising his eyebrows.  “Did you manage to get any information?”

“Oh, yeah, that same shopkeeper had seen Remus,” Roman said, moving to pick up a crate.  “He’s apparently a frequent stop when Janus and Virgil are making rounds.  He still wouldn’t say any of the travel path out loud, though.”

Roman carried the crate on board and set it down with an irritated sigh.  His least favorite thing about the outside world so far was that everyone seemed to know about Janus and Virgil Picani’s travel route but never said it out loud.  It was like they expected him to know it.

Roman gave that a moment of thought.  Maybe they did all know it.  They probably just refused to mention it around Light soldiers.  It would certainly make sense with how uncooperative they all were.  God, he couldn’t imagine how awful it was for Remus to have no idea where he was.  If he was a prisoner they probably wouldn’t even let him see the stars.  He must be so disoriented.

Roman finished carrying the rest of the crates on board as Shane bought them both some lunch, noting how they should have at least one fresh meal before they had to start eating out of crates again.  Roman sat on the far side of the ship and ate his sandwich while looking out at the sea.

Shane sat down next to him after a moment.  “You alright, kid?”

“I’m… worried,” Roman admitted.  “And pissed.  I’m not really sure who to direct that second one at yet.  I don’t want to think Remus is a traitor.”

“But a lot of signs are pointing that direction?” Shane asked, sounding surprisingly sympathetic.

Roman glanced over at him.  He didn’t really want to think about it.  He tried to think about Remus as a prisoner because it was the better alternative.

…Right?

“It’s alright,” Shane said.  “He’s your brother.  It’s natural to care about him.  Even if he turns out to be a traitorous screw-up.  As usual,” Shane finished the last part in a mutter, taking another bite out of his sandwich.

Roman sighed.  “I know the kind of reputation my brother has, okay?  Believe me.”  He took a bite of his own sandwich.  “But I don’t think he’d betray anyone.  He tries really hard.  He’s just… accident prone.”

Shane chuckled.  “Tries really hard, huh?  I’ll believe it when I see it.”

Roman sighed.  He doubted he was actually going to get anywhere in this conversation.  Most people didn’t really seem to believe in Remus, and he wouldn’t lie and say it didn’t make it hard for him to believe in Remus sometimes.  He loved his brother, and he wasn’t going to start out by believing that Remus was a traitor, but the idea that he was kidnapped by two high ranking rebellion members didn’t seem to make a ton of sense.

He supposed it didn’t really matter in the long run.  He was going to get Remus back either way, it was just whether or not he would hug the living daylights out of him or smack him upside the head that was yet to be determined.

Roman ate the last of his sandwich and looked up towards the sky, trying to puzzle out the way he was feeling.  He didn’t really get anywhere before Shane said they had to go, and he stood up to go help fly the ship.

Chapter Eight

[rrickgrrimes8]

Normality is Death

Chapter Two ~ My Current Existence

masterlist

My eyes darted across the room as I woke, rather abruptly, in a cold searing sweat. The whole room was matted in darkness and the lantern I had lit the night before had not soon gone out. I sighed hopelessly and pushed myself out of bed sliding my combat boots on as I did. I looked outside to see the break of dawn just highlighting the horizon - it's early then I concluded. I stretched and yawned as I left my room locking the door right after - just to be safe. 

A lot has happened since Mom, Shane and Carl left me in the forest that day, too much has happened really. It's been around 3 months since I last saw my family and although I'd like to stay hopeful, I can't shake the feeling that they're dead or hurt in some way. But regardless I need to forget them. They left me. End off - period. My family abandoned me and I have to live knowing that and they have to live knowing that they played a hand in what they think was my death. I know it sounds cold, brutal even but I tried, I really did. I looked for them everywhere. I did everything a 14-year-old girl could possibly do in a world like this and I almost died countless times trying. So I gave up. I gave up not only to protect myself but because I realised that they probably wouldn't be looking for me. Hell, they think I'm dead right? 

Since everything happened in Atlanta the government had been completely radio silent. Lots of people think it's because there's no one left to send a signal. I, however, believe that that's extremely morbid and I guess I'm still holding out hope that someone will swoop in and save us all. It sounds very fairy tale I get that. It's just I'm a 14-year-old girl and I'm so sick of this world already. To the point where I couldn't even think about living any longer in a world like this. 

Sometime during the second month of what people like to call the turning, I met some people. They took me in gave me food, a shelter, some water. Basically, they gave me essential shit I was definitely lacking. Something they also did was train me. I'm not the best, but I do have pretty basic training in hand to hand combat, the basic workings of a gun (thanks to my father mostly) and I'm pretty good with melee weapons. They protected me is what I'm saying. They are my new family - a better family I could ever ask for. 

Our camp consists of 2 houses, housing 4 or 5 people in each. Mitchell, our leader, oversees any newcomers and basically keeps law and order around here. I met them after getting trapped in Atlanta and getting cornered by a dozen or so biters. Mitchell and a few others came in and massacred all of the living dead and took me in.

"Yoohoo! Jacey get your ass up it's your turn to hunt!" my friend, Addie, shouted rudely to me as I walked down the stairs. 

"Jeez Addie, I'm coming don't get ya panties in a twist," I teased nudging her shoulder once I got close enough. She had her usual skinny jeans and a grey tank top on but her hair was styled in a pair of small buns rather than her usually high pony. 

At my reply, her eyebrows furrowed and her usually bright and beautiful eyes closed before sighing. "Do not jeez me, woman, you've got shit to do you're slacking!" she exclaimed practically pushing me out the door and into the burning sun. I promptly lifted my hands to cover my eyes from the brightness. 

"Oh my lord, I know it's your thing to be this emo vampire goth girl who only stays in her room away from people, civilization and oh how could I forget the sun. but this is ridiculous it ain't even bright out." Addie joked forcing my arm down making me embrace the scorching heat. 

"You call this civilization? If so you've got a warped definition" I said picking up a knife and gun from the armoury. 

"Just go before I get even more sick of you, Jace," Addie laughed as I rolled my eyes, gave her the finger and strutted away sassily. "And you be careful kid Mitchell went out yesterday and there were more biters then usual. He thinks a herd might pass through so don't use your gun and you know don't die?" She said almost seriously which was incredibly out of style for her but nevertheless, I smiled and walked off into the woods. 

She was right about the number of biters. After only being out an hour I've seen 16 in our woods alone and I haven't even ventured out in the city yet, which is notoriously worse but I only really have to go to Atlanta if we're desperate. I had only picked up 2 squirrels so far I guessed that the movement of the herd could be driving some of the bigger animals away, which sucks because once I tell Mitchell he's just gonna want me to go into Atlanta to gather supplies. I mentally groaned and sat down against some tree, wishing things were different. 

"Looky what we have here gentlemen." A husky voice called out from the shadows. I instantly stood up and gathered my findings and unsheathed my machete. 

"What the hell do you want?" I stood my ground as I saw a group of maybe 5 guys come closer. 

"Ooh she's sassy," the guy who looked to be the leader teased, "always liked a girl with a little spunk in her as long as she learns to shut up when daddy needs some pleasing." I could've thrown up right then and there if not for the guard I needed to keep up. 

"You're fucking disgusting," I stated unforgivingly, earning some laughs from the group. 

"You really are quite confident aren't ya?" I stayed quiet as he stepped forward, "I can always give you a lesson or two about respect and I mean clothing's optional." 

"How about you shut the fuck up before you really piss me off," I said calmly still showing my anger. 

The man in front of me however got furious over my words and brought his hand down to my cheek. I fell to the ground at the impact, "I told you to learn some fucking respect little girl." 

"And I said to shut the fuck up you creepy bastard," I got my machete out and cut into the guy's leg not giving any warning before punching him in the face, sending him towards the ground, "But you know speaking about respect. How about you learn some fucking respect for me or you know all of my gender?" I more ordered then questioned while striking the guy in the face again. "And next time, asshole, watch your tone when you speak to a woman," I smiled sweetly at him before marching off into the opposite direction. 

"Oh and if I see anyone of you anywhere around here, I'll chop each and every single one of your dicks off."

I arrived back home later that night after hunting another squirrel and a rabbit on top of my earlier findings. 

"So whatcha get for us tonight babydoll?" Mitchell said after seeing me walk up. Mitchell was a 25-year-old now-former English teacher who somehow became our leader. He wasn't extraordinarily brave nor was he an elite strategist but he was a good mentor, who had people that trust him - those people including me. 

"Just some squirrel and a rabbit nothin' special." Mitchell nodded as I started to walk away, "Any trouble?" 

I span around to him before saying, "always." Mitchell gave me an unimpressed look before taking my hunt and walking away. 

"Why am I not surprised?" he laughs while passing most of our group towards the fire. "Anything serious?" I shook my head before sitting on the rough log placed next to the heat. 

"Jus' some jackasses who thought they could take me. Guess I taught them a lesson in respect." Once again Mitchell laughed and sat next to me. 

"I know I don't need to tell you this every time you go out but you've got to be careful, okay? Your safety is my top priority and I know you hate to hear it but you're only a kid. And kids can get hurt pretty easily especially in this sort of life and I'd hate to see that happen to you." Mitchell wrapped his arm around me in a brotherly sort of way as I nodded. I understand he just wanted to help regardless of how much I hate to be called a kid. 

"I'm smart Mitchy. I'm not just some dumb kid. Plus haven't you heard I'm kind of undefeatable. Nothin can kill me," I boasted standing up and heading away from the majority of our group and back to my room. Before I left I saw Mitchell smiling then going off to talk to someone else.

I entered my room lighting a candle straight away and then dropping my bag. As soon as I entered all I could smell was the stenched of sweat and gore. I honestly don't think I've ever gone this long without a shower and I miss it so goddamn much. I miss so many things. I miss deodorant, a warm bed, fast food, soda and not to mention my mom's famous spaghetti bolognese. Just because I wasn't a fan of the woman does not mean I cannot love the food because damn she could cook. The only thing she couldn’t master, however, was pancakes but that didn’t stop her from trying. I smiled slightly reminiscing of the family meals we would have whenever we got the chance. We would all sit around the table talking, eating and just enjoying being around each other. But now they're gone so that's not going to happen anytime soon for me.

"What are you doing, Grimes?" Addie asked pulling me out of my trance.

"Nothin'," I spoke shortly before lying down onto my bed. 

"Don't seem like nothing. Talk to me, love." She walked over and sat next to me taking her hand into mine. 

"M' okay," I reassured her before closing my eyes. I felt Addie shift closer to me still holding my hand causing me to smile. 

Addie was the only other teenager in this group so we bonded pretty quickly despite her being 2 years older, "You don't have to be okay, Jacey." I couldn't help but shudder at her words - the same words I heard from Shane the day it happened. 

"Don't say that, please." I hadn't even realised the quiver in my voice before Addie sat up, bringing me with her. 

"Hey, it's okay, I'm sorry I didn't mean to upset you," The brunette girl said to me. 

"It's not you i-it's jus'-" I couldn't finish my sentence before I started to sob. Memories of that night haunted me. I lost so much and so did everyone else but I couldn't understand how they were so okay with it. I lost my home, my dad, my family and my childhood all in one night. And I'm so sick of trying to be okay with that. "I just miss them so much." I finished while getting devoured by Addie's arms. I could hear her softly singing in my ear in order to calm me down and it soon did. I relaxed into her arms after a few minutes but neither of us made any indication that we were going to depart. 

"Who did you lose?" She asked gently. 

"Everyone," I could feel myself beginning to cry again but I pushed it away - I couldn't be weak any longer. 

"I'm sorry, Jacey. I hate seeing you like this. I wish I could take your pain away." 

I hummed shakily before looking up into her brown eyes, "Then do it." With that, she leaned in. Slowly I started to prepare myself to meet her lips but it never came. 

She pulled away from me and stood up, "We can't do this."

I sat up as well but remained seated on the bed, "Why?" She gave me no answer and just looked out of the window. "Addie, please, just tell me why not? For christ sakes, the world has ended. We've got nothing else to lose." 

"It's wrong," She said simply yet with so much emotion and left the room.

I felt the tears begin to return and I just let them fall.

"It's wrong."

That's all it took to break me -  2 words. 

"She's right."

[sarcasm-with-a-side-of-fries]

My girl

Derek Morgan/Spencer Reid, Derek Morgan & Cory Reid (OC), Spencer Reid & Cory Reid (OC)

(Song fic based on “my girl” by Elvie Shane) 

Authors note/background- Spencer Reid never joins the FBI, he’s a professor at Georgetown university. Derek Morgan is still in the BAU and the BAU members do pop up.Cory is the result of a past “relationship” Spencer was in, her mother is never mentioned because she abandons Cory and Spencer right after Cory is born.He meets Derek at the coffee shop they both happen to frequent. Cory looks like her mother (it’s why she has red hair and blue eyes, although again it’s never mentioned)

She ain’t got my smile that don’t bother me a bit and she’s got somebody else’s eyes I’m seeing myself in.

The red haired, Hazel eye little girl holds tightly onto Spencer’s hand. He had explained to her (the best he could, seeing that she is only four) that he had someone he wanted her to meet.

I’m holding onto every moment god knows I’ve missed a few the day we meant I knew I had some catching up to do.

The first time they meet Cory is a little hesitant, eyeing him with a look that reminds him so much of Spencer. He’s worried for a while that she won’t like him.

“She’ll warm up to you.”

He gives her a small stuffed dog and when the night ends she hugs him before she runs off to bed.

“Told you she'd warm up to you.” Spencer remarks later that night.

“Yeah, I guess you did.” Derek agrees, kissing Spencer temple.

“Did you just admit that I was right?” The mischievous smile that works its way onto Spencer’s face is honestly terrifying.

“Yes and I’m already regretting it.”

She ain’t my blood, ain’t got my name but if she did I’d feel the same I wasn’t there for her first steps but I ain’t missed a moment yet and,

They’ve met four times when Cory decides that Derek must have hung the stars when he lets her ride on his shoulders at the carnival, something Spencer ever so careful would never do.

“Papa, I'm so tall!” She exclaims giggling wildly when Derek pretends to almost drop her.

“Derek be careful-!”

“Relax pretty boy. I’m not actually going to drop her, right Cory?”

“Mhm! Relax papa!” They both laugh at that.

By the end of the day Cory had been completely tuckered out and Derek had moved her down from his shoulder to his hip.

That ain’t ever gonna change I could never walk away yeah she’s my baby my whole world.

“Cory’s asking about you.” Spencer tells Derek over lunch. “I don’t think she understands your job.”

“You could bring her to mine tonight, Clooney’s a general giant who loves kids.”

“Sure.”

Cory falls in love with Clooney the moment she meets him, nicknaming him ‘cloon’ because she can’t pronounce Clooney and it’s too adorable to correct.

“Night night cloon night night Derek.” She mumbles that night patting Derek’s chest tiredly, a familiar small stuffed dog gripped tightly in her hand. Derek hadn’t even realised she’d brought it with her.

“She has dragged it everywhere since you left on that case two weeks ago.” Spencer murmurs with an amused smile.

“Huh.” Derek responds with a smile on his face.

She ain’t my blood but she’s my girl, Yeah she’s my girl.

He’s known Cory for seven months the first time he watches her alone for longer than an hour. Spencer was asked to give a lecture at a college in New York and her normal sitter was sick.

The day went easily, having taken her to the park and then for ice cream before retiring for the day. If you’d told him eight months ago he’d know the lyrics to just about every Disney song very soon he’d have called you crazy but… here he is.

Thumb in mouth Cory curls up with Derek her head against his shoulder. “Papa smile more.” She tells him and he’s confused. “You.” She says. “Him smile more.” And or doesn’t make much sense or maybe it doesn’t. “Good.” He doesn’t get the chance to question her because she drops off to sleep shortly after.

He carries her to the the guest bedroom that isn’t much of a guest bedroom anymore considering the toys, blue blankets and child clothes that can now be seen.

It hit me like a train the first time she called me dad (pops) in a three stick figure crayon picture with all of us holding hands.

Her mama (papa) said I understand if it’s too soon for this oh I didn’t let her (him) finish I took it to the kitchen and stuck it right on the fridge.

It's been almost a year when she goes to Derek’s house from school with a scribbled picture and bright smile. She places the picture next to Derek before running off down the hall in search of her stuffed dog and action figures.

Derek picks it up and freezes for a moment staring at the page with an unreadable expression. Spencer sees him from the corner of his eye and crosses the room looking over Derek’s shoulder.

It’s the three of them at the park, she’s standing between them holding each of their hands. That however isn’t the part that caused them to pause, it was what she’d written. They are labeled, ‘me’ , ‘papa’ , ‘pops’ the top of the page dawned with the words ‘my family’

“Oh.” Spencer breathes out. “Look I understand if…” Derek shakes his head standing up with a small smile, sticking the picture among the many others that now littered his fridge.

From that day on he’s pops.

She ain’t my blood, ain’t got my name but if she did I’d feel the same I wasn’t there for her first steps but I ain’t missed a moment yet and that ain’t ever gonna change I could never walk away,

The first time she sees him in a hospital is heartbreaking, her eyes full up with tears. “Pops.” She calls out sobbing when her comatose pops doesn’t respond.

“He’ll wake up.” Spencer says though he isn’t sure who he’s reassuring by that point.

“He was hit hard but he should wake up.” David Rossi, Derek’s team member who Spencer has come to know over the past year and two months. “Always has to play hero.” Rossi adds with a head shake before leaving the two alone.

It’s six hours later when Derek does wake up. “Spence?” He croaks out.

“You're awake! Oh thank god. Don’t you ever think about doing anything like that ever again Derek Morgan or so help me-“

“Move in with me. Both of you, move in with me.”

“What?” Spencer is dumbfounded.

“You heard me.” And Spencer almost laughs at the oddity of the situation.

“I’ll move in with you if you promise never to leave me. Us.” He motions over to where Cory is sleeping.

“Never gonna leave you.” Derek promises.

When Cory wakes she ends up crawling into the hospital bed with Derek (screw protocol) and refuses to let go of his shirt until he’s discharged four days later.

Yeah she’s my baby my whole world she ain’t by blood but she’s my girl.

The Reid’s official move in a month later, waving goodbye to their small D.C apartment with no tears shred.

“Pops. Papa.” Cory says wiggling her way between them on the couch.

“What are you doing up Angel?” Derek asks.

“Dunno.”

They laugh at the sheer honesty but don’t send her away letting her fall asleep with them. Spencer eventually carried her to bed, making sure not to forget her stuffed dog.

She’s Saturday morning cartoons.

The sound of hysterical laughter is heard throughout the house rousing Spencer from his sleep and prompting him to pad into the living room.

Derek is sitting on the couch half asleep, Cory sat on his lap intently watching ‘bubble guppies’ and petting Clooney.

Spencer smiles and if he snaps a picture, no one needs to know.

She’s hey can I sleep in your room?

Cory learns to hate when Derek leaves for cases, sometimes going as far as throwing tantrums when he tries to say goodbye but that never changes her response to him coming home. No matter how mad she was at him for leaving.

Derek comes home close to midnight and doesn’t expect to see Cory until morning but is mistaken as she’s sitting up on the couch in the living room when he enters the house. “I made the mistake of telling her that you were on your way home.” Spencer explains, which cues Cory in on Derek’s arrival.

“Pops!” She turns around standing on the couch and reaching out insistently. “Your home.”

“Hey Princess, of course I am. I always come home.” Spencer smiles fondly.

“Can I sleep with yous?” She asks looking between Derek and Spencer innocently.

“Of course you can Cory.” Spencer says walking over to kiss Derek.

“Yuck!” They both laugh loudly.

She’s bigger than the plans I ever had. She's making me a better man.

“I never thought I’d get this.” Derek tells Spencer one night.

“Hmm?” Spencer prompts wrapping himself around Derek.

“This.” He motions around. “You and Cory.”

“I thought it would always just be me and Cory.” Spencer admits. “No one wants to date a single dad who’s a college professor with a past off… expect you did.”

“You're not your past Spencer.”

“And you're not yours.” They don’t address the true meaning of the sentence instead Derek smiles, lifting a sleeping Cory into his arms and heading down the hall.

She ain’t my blood, ain’t got my name but if she did I’d feel the same I wasn’t there for her first steps but I ain’t missed a moment yet and that ain’t ever gonna change I could never walk.

The wedding is in June, they’d been together for two and a half years when they decided to get married.

Cory is the flower girl, Henry the ring barrier.

Derek’s team is there, his mother and sisters too.

Spencer mom is there, along with a few of his professor friends.

Hotch is Derek’s best man, his groomsmen and woman being Penelope and James.

Reid’s best woman is JJ, his groomsmen and woman being Emily and Rossi.

It’s a small thing really.

There’s a party afterwards.

“Papa lap.”

“Cory I’m eating.” He tells her with a stern look.

“Pops lap.”

“I’m eating too princess.” He responds. Still not deterred she pushes Derek’s arm out of the way and climbs into his lap successfully seeing as Penelope had changed her out of her suit before dinner. (She had refused a dress and neither of her fathers saw it necessary to force her into clothes she doesn’t want.) “Alright fine.” Derek huffs although there’s no heat in his voice.

“Pushover.” Spencer mummers into his wine glass ignoring the glare his husband shot him. “Cory, do you want your own plate of food?” Spencer asked and got his answer when she shook her head instead picking food off of their plates.

Yeah she’s my baby my whole world, she ain’t my blood but she’s my girl.

It’s six months later when they all sit in a family court room, their friends and family sitting on the public benches behind them.

They sign the papers in front of everyone and then the judge announces loudly, “I hereby declare Cory Reid-Morgan adopted.”

They go out for ice cream as a large group to celebrate, Cory happily running around with Jack and Henry afterwards.

When it’s time for everyone to leave Cory demands to be picked up by Derek who complies. She rests her head on his shoulder and quietly murmurs. “I love you.”

“I love you too princess.”

“To the moon and back?”

“A million times.” Spencer comes up from behind wrapping his arms around Derek's waist and resting his chin on the shoulder not occupied by Cory’s head.

“Love you Derek.”

“Love you too Spencer.”

Yeah she’s my girl.

[stardust-walker]

High Hopes: Chapter 11

Previous Chapters:  1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

word count: 3364

______________________________________

Dove never thought that she would see sunlight again. She felt sad for losing Jacqui, of course. The older woman had been kinder to her and Carol than she had to be, but she was more grateful to have her family with her. To be able to feel the sun on her face again. She stood close by Carol as she watched the men try to bust the windows down with everything, they could get their hands on. The axes, chairs, hell even the guns. Nothing worked.

A thought crossed through Dove’s head as she sat on the ground next to Sophia to shield her from anything that might go flying. In an instant, her attention was drawn away from the window to her sister who was already on her feet, ready to hand Rick a grenade. She scrambled to her feet, more careful as she pulled Sophia right along with her. “A nail file isn’t gonna help,” Shane said. God even close to death, Shane can be a fucking asshole. She said nothing and smirked to herself as she saw the shock cross Rick’s face.

The explosion was loud and shook the whole room. Sophia yelped and Dove covered her ears as the grenade exploded and the glass shattered. She could feel the wind on her back already, they were so nearly free. There was shouting as everyone began to pile towards the window. Glenn jumped down out of the window and held his hand out to Dove, ready to steady her when she landed. As soon as her feet touched the ground, she turned and held her arms out for Sophia as the others continued to jump around her. “Just jump, Sophia. I got you!” Dove called up to her as Carol jumped down and cast a worried glance between her family members.

“You can do it Sophia, come on honey. It’s not that far,” Carol’s voice shook.

Sophia let out a small whimper before she finally jumped. Just like she promised, Dove leaned forward and caught the girl before her feet could touch the ground. “Good girl, Soph,” Glenn managed a weak smile as the four of them took off towards the cars with the rest of the group. There were walkers everywhere, but they were going down just as fast. It was only as she pushed Sophia and Carol closer to the car that she noticed something.

“Wait where’s Dale,” Dove shouted over the chaos.

Carol froze, hand on the door handle to the car before she pointed towards the building. “There they are!” Dove took her word for it as she opened the passenger side door and got into the car. She wanted Carol to slam on the gas and just go but she knew there was no way they were going anywhere alone.

The shockwaves from the CDC exploding shook the earth around them as Carol laid down across the front seat. Dove peeked her head up when it was finally over, only to see that Sophia was peeking her head up from the floor of the Jeep. “Good girl,” Dove chuckled weakly as she reached back and ruffled Sophia’s hair.

A look through the back window before the caravan started to move showed that T and even Daryl looked just as frightened as everyone else did. There was nowhere to go but forward. The younger woman leaned back in the passenger seat as Carol put the car in drive. It was the first time in a long time that she just wanted to drive in silence.

~

No matter how nice they were, Dove didn’t like the idea of heading back to the Vatos gang. Something just didn’t feel right about it and she was sure to tell her sister about it. “Listen, I mean they weren’t bad people. There were a lot of them there, I just don’t know if they’ll be so willing to take in a big group of people,” she muttered to Carol after she heard Rick talk over the walkie.

Carol sighed and ran a hand down her face. “I don’t know. We might as well go if Rick thinks it’s a good idea.” She tried to keep her voice down as best she could. Dove could feel for her, still wanting to protect Sophia from hearing things she shouldn’t have to.

A quick look over her shoulder and Dove leaned closer to her sister in the front seat. “Yeah well Rick also thought the CDC was a good idea and look…”

“Enough. We’re not talking about this anymore,” Carol shook her head as she reached over and hit the volume button on the radio. Dove’s music started right back up where she left off and she was left feeling like a scolded child as she huffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

It was silent until they pulled up to the gates, then it was too silent. Dove whispered, “Sophia, do me a favor? Hand me that crowbar in the hatch back there,” Dove said as she continued to stare out the front windshield.

“This one,” Sophia questioned as she passed it in between the two women in the front seat.

Carol looked between her sister and the weapon but didn’t say anything. Dove beamed as she took the bar from the girl’s hand. “Yes, that exact one. Thank you, sweetheart.” She felt like a line of ants as the group marched along together up to the bricks that marked the entrance.

“All the guns they gave us, they’ll probably throw us a party,” Daryl answered as Andrea voiced Dove’s own concerns about the group, they were on their way to see. “Good call…for once,” he glanced sideways at Rick. Dove rolled her eyes and held a hand behind her.

“Just stay behind me, okay,” she said quietly to Carol and Sophia. As they walked further in, it felt more and more wrong.

“Where’re the lookouts,” Glenn panicked.

“Something isn’t right here,” Dove hissed back quietly as her eyes darted around the grounds. A few moments later, she realized what exactly had happened. Walkers were inside the camp. Panic swept over her as she turned her back to the men and focused on Sophia. Carol already held a hand over her eyes and crouched down next to her. “Don’t scream it’s gonna be alright,” Dove tried to keep her voice calm even though she felt her own panic rising.

She pulled Sophia right after her as they began to follow Rick through the building. Dove offered quiet words of encouragement to Sophia for being able to keep quiet, hell it was worth a shot. It didn’t help much as the little girl rounded the corner first and got a full view of a few dead bodies. As Sophia clung to her mother, Dove’s attention turned to Daryl. “You shut that little girl the hell up! Right now, or I will” he growled back at them.

Dove narrowed her eyes and raised her crowbar slightly until a strong grip made her stop. “You cut that out, right now.” Lori warned him as she pushed Dove back a step. She had to give it to the other woman, she had really nailed the ‘lecturing mom’ look and voice. It even made Dixon stop with how intense she was. A sharp tug on her arm pulled her back as the women went to block the doors. “Listen, I know you’re angry.” Lori sighed as they pulled an empty refrigerator across the room together, “but you can’t let him get to you like that.”

Dove huffed as she pulled harder on the fridge, a relieved exhale left her as Lori nodded to show that it was good enough. Dove brushed her hair back from her face and lowered her voice. “He threatened Sophia.”

Lori shook her head and placed a hand on the younger brunette’s shoulder, “You leave Daryl to me. I mean he listened this time, right?” Dove didn’t answer and Lori continued. “Besides, if he gets too out of hand, we’ll just sick you on him.” Lori gave her arm a playful shove before she marched back over to the others.

“Promises, promises,” Dove chuckled as she picked up her crowbar and tried to prepare herself for what else they might see. Sudden movement behind the door made her drop to the ground where she stood. Her eyes locked with Carol until it was safe enough to move.

~

It was serious business when Carol was angry enough to speak her mind and Dove knew it. “Are you telling the truth or are you lying like all the other times?” Carol looked angry and Dove felt a wave of admiration go through her. There she was, that was the woman that made Dove want to be strong. The real Carol peeked through for a moment and then it was gone like a puff of smoke as Lori spoke in defense of her husband.

Dove placed a hand on Carol’s shoulder and gave it a squeeze, “Atta girl,” she muttered under her breath.

“The hell happened,” Glenn sighed as he looked around the room.

“What do you think,” Andrea spoke up. Dove felt her blood start to boil. Did she have to be so condescending? “They got overrun.” Dove rolled her eyes, then raised her eyebrows. Daryl had scoffed at the other woman. “Something to say,” Andrea snapped.

“Uh yeah, how about observant,” Daryl snapped right back.

Andrea nodded, “Observant. Big word coming from a guy like you. Three whole syllables.”

Dove pinched the bridge of her nose, “Can you like stop being a condescending bitch for like 5 damn seconds and let someone else have an opinion?” She planted her feet on the ground and placed her hand on her hip as she observed the other woman. There was a stunned silence for a moment before Daryl continued. Hell, she never thought she’d defend Daryl ever, especially after what he’d said to Sophia, but everyone deserved to have their voices heard.

Daryl continued, “Walkers didn’t do this.” That was clear to anyone with a brain. The ones she’d seen all had headshots. “Geeks didn’t show up until all this went down. Somebody attacked this place.” Dove felt Sophia shift closer to her. “Killed all these people, took whatever they wanted. They’re all shot in the head, execution style. Y’all worried about walkers? What about the people that came and did all this?”

Dove glanced over at Rick as he looked over a body. A nod from the sheriff seemed to confirm everything that Daryl had just said. Dove never thought she would see the day when she could appreciate any words coming out of the mouth of Daryl Dixon, but she never thought she’d see the dead walk either. “Get a dictionary,” Daryl smirked at Andrea, “look it up. Observant.”

Dove couldn’t fight back the nervous giggle that left her lips at Andrea’s face. A subtle slap to the arm made her clear her throat as she rose to her feet again. “Sorry. Sorry,” she mumbled as she placed a hand over her mouth and walked over closer to Glenn.

Glenn watched as Daryl left the room. “Did that just happen,” he mumbled to Dove.

“I don’t know about you, but that might have just about been the best thing I’ve seen in weeks,” Dove whispered back. “But odds are, that might have shoved the stick further up Andrea’s ass.” She nudged Glenn as the group started to move on again. Glenn just shook his head.

~

One bottle of water, garbanzo beans, and fucking cough drops. That’s all that was left out of everything Guillermo had fought for. What would be left of her when she died? Probably just a crowbar, a comfortable pair of boots, and maybe a few old pieces of jewelry. That’s if she was lucky.

“I don’t think salty snacks are that great without water,” Dove sighed as she caught the bag of chips Shane had tossed to her.. “I think I’ll pass,” she smiled as she held out her bag of chips to Carl. The little boy took them with a big beaming smile.

Dove wasn’t that surprised at all to see that Shane had managed to smuggle a bottle of wine out of the CDC right along with him. “I’d go easy on that stuff,” Lori spoke up again as Daryl went to open the bottle, “don’t forget where we are.”

Daryl nodded and uttered a quick, “Yes ma’am,” before popping the bottle open. Dove ruffled Sophia’s hair as she tried her best to look like she was enjoying the meal in front of her. It made her sad to think about all the things her family might have been through without her around.

Dove sighed and dug through the bag she had left in the car. She shuffled a pack of cards nervously as Glenn brought up all the people that had been killed. Her eyes drifted around the room before they landed on Daryl. He just shook his head as he took another drink from the bottle. Carol shook her head as the men left the room. “I’m perfectly fine with them talking about it with adults here but with the kids, they really do need to be more careful,” she sighed as she stroked Sophia’s hair and tried to calm her down.

Lori sank down to the ground next to Carl and stared at the paper crafts on the wall. “I’m sorry, Carol. I can talk to them when they get back in if you want.”

Dove shook her head as she focused on the movement of the cards between her hands. “You don’t have to. I’ll do it.” Her focus shifted to the other woman, a look of surprise on her face. “You don’t have to carry the weight of actual common sense on your shoulders, Lori. I got you this time, but you owe me.” Lori smiled gratefully as she went to reply but was interrupted by a scoff from across the room. “You got some other enlightening information for us all Andrea, or are you just going to sit over there are wallow enough for all of us?” Dove’s attention turned to the blonde woman.

Andrea shifted forward as she spoke, “You’re all trying to play leader like it matter or something. Everything’s gone. None of that matters anymore! Look around us! Everyone else is dead,” Andrea stopped as Sophia began to whimper and inched closer to Carol.

Dove gripped the cards in her hands so tight she thought she might break the skin before she composed herself enough to reply, “If none of it matters then why the hell are you still here? You don’t even believe half of the shit you’re spewing out. I think you’re just angry because Dale wouldn’t let you get yourself blown up and on top of it? You got outsmarted by Daryl Dixon of all people! Now I can’t imagine how that would feel, but what I would like to imagine is for you to decide whether you want to stay here and act like shit matters or else you decide to go out on your own and get yourself killed.” The silence between the women in the room was palpable as Carol stared at her sister and Lori placed an arm around Carl.

“You must have been a shitty counselor,” Andrea snapped at the brunette across from her.

“Yeah and you must have been a real shit lawyer if that’s your only argument. Now shut the hell up and eat your beans or I’ll come over there and take them for someone who’s actually grateful for what they got,” Dove snapped. The silence was only broken by the door being opened back up and the men filed back in. A confused look crossed Dale’s face as he glanced over and saw Andrea begin to pick at the food on her plate. A hand raised in the air and that said to Dove that he wasn’t even going to ask.

~

A few hours passed after Dove had taken it upon herself to talk to Glenn about not upsetting Sophia and she felt like she had kicked a puppy. At least she’d done him the courtesy of doing it while he was on watch. A hand shook her awake from her slumber as she jolted up. It was Glenn. “Hey, you asked me to let you know when I was off watch. You sure you wanna go out there,” even in the dark, she could see the worry cross his face.

Dove sighed heavily as she dug into her bag and pulled out the pack of cigarettes she’d been trying to sneak since this whole thing started. She’d been too close to Carol, she’d feared a lecture, but now she couldn’t give a fuck. “Yeah, gotta bite the bullet and go talk to the other one.” She ran a hand through her hair as she shoved the pack and her lighter into her pocket. Glenn held a handout and helped his friend to her feet before he took her spot on the ground next to Carol and Sophia. “Keep it warm for me, buddy,” Dove winked at the younger man as she headed quietly to the door.

She didn’t have to look far until she saw the man on the top of the stairs. His hearing must have been better than she thought as he turned to see her walk down the hallway. Dove pulled her hands from her pockets and held them up, pack in one hand and lighter in the other. “I come in peace,” she whispered as she came to a stop by the railing. Daryl just grunted as he turned to look back down the stairs. The only sound the echoed between them for a moment was a click from the lighter and then a relieved sigh as the cigarette finally lit. Dove held out the pack to Daryl as she removed the cigarette from her mouth and blew the smoke out after a few seconds. “A one-time offer,” she chirped as she waved the pack in front of the man and handed him the lighter after he swiped it from her hand.

“What do ya want,” he whispered as he began to light his cigarette.

Dove sighed and rubbed her forehead. “Sorry that I told you I was going to put you in a chokehold. I was stressed,” she caught Daryl’s eye for a moment. The look on his face made her want to shrink back into her coat. “Yeah, that must sound pretty stupid. I’m not sorry for wanting to kick your ass for being a dick to Sophia though.” She laughed quietly before Daryl spoke up.

“Apology accepted. But next time you threaten me with something, you best follow through,” Daryl’s response was humorless and Dove just nodded in response.

The two of them spent the next few minutes in silence. Smoke filling their lungs and being blown back out into the air every few seconds. Dove yawned and raised her arms above her head, “I thought it was pretty awesome how you took charge before when Andrea tried to call you stupid.”

Another scoff. “I didn’t do it to fucking be awesome. Ya’ll gotta know what we’re dealin with. I don’t give a shit if someone thinks I’m stupid. So long as I know I got my shit together.”

Dove nodded her head as she tossed cigarette to the floor. The light on the end of the cigarette went out as she pressed the toe of her shoe into it and blew the last of the smoke from her mouth. “For what it’s worth, I don’t think you’re that stupid.” Daryl turned his head slightly to look at her, his expression unreadable. A smirk crept onto Dove’s face as she leaned down slightly, “but if you threaten my niece again? I just might have to kill you.” She stood up straighter again, as calm as ever. “Night,” she cooed over her shoulder and then she was off down the hallway again. Within a matter of seconds, Daryl was alone in the hallway again and it was like it never happened.

_

@crossbowking​ @momc95​ @chaotic-gary-king-stan​​

[welcometophu]

Not Your Guardian Angel: Chapter 5

Marked Book 3: Not Your Guardian Angel

Chapter 5

[ Previous | First | Next ]

Cheyenne sits cross-legged on Pels’s bed, facing her. There are three towels spread out to keep the bed clean, and they already look blood-spattered by drops of spaghetti sauce from when Cheyenne gestured with her fork while eating.

They’d delivered a big bowl of pasta to Mom, then retreated to Pels’s room with their own second attempt at dinner, the door shut behind them. They’ll know when Peter comes home, and honestly, Pels hopes to be asleep before his SUV pulls back into the driveway.

For a little while, it’s been easy. Pels can eat quietly and forget about everything else, while Cheyenne fills the empty spaces with chatter about school, Adric, and gymnastics. It’s great, until dinner is done, and they put the bowls aside on Pels’s bureau, and Cheyenne pulls the spattered towels off the bed, bundling them up.

“Can I stay in your bed tonight, or do I need to sleep on the floor?” Cheyenne asks quietly.

Pels remembers the first time Cheyenne crawled into bed with her. Pels was seven, and Cheyenne was two. Cheyenne had just figured out how to climb out of her crib, over the rail, and had toddled down the hall to climb in with Pels during a thunderstorm. When that meant that Cheyenne got upgraded to a “big girl bed” by taking Pels’s bed, Mom had given Pels a big double bed to sprawl in. Pels is small enough that she hasn’t cared when Cheyenne has continued to climb in, whenever she’s scared, ever since.

Pels snorts softly. “When have I ever made you sleep on the floor?”

Cheyenne grins and throws her pillow on the bed, then stretches out, her legs longer than Pels’s, feet reaching further down the bed as they lie next to each other. “Okay. So. What next?” she whispers.

“You know what you need to do,” Dad says. He’s standing by the bureau, looking down at the bowls and idly poking at one of the forks.

“Dad, it’s creepy when you hang out at night,” Pels says plainly.

“And you’re ignoring my point.”

“I don’t mind if he’s here.” Cheyenne waves at the air. “I mean, he’s always here, right? Like. He’s been here since I was a baby. I’m pretty sure I can’t care. He’s not my dad, but he’s your dad, so he’s like my Peter. Only dead.”

And nicer. But Pels isn’t going to say that out loud. After all, Dad has his issues and can be manipulative at times, so while he’s definitely not Peter, he also isn’t perfect. Besides, Cheyenne doesn’t need to be reminded just how bad Peter can be. “Okay then.” There really isn’t much she can do about him anyway. If he wants to stay, he’s going to stay. “We need a plan.”

“Where can you go?”

It’s a reasonable question, and Pels has been thinking about it while they ate. If it were Cheyenne, maybe it’d be easy. She has friends everywhere. “I only really have friends at PHU,” she admits. “And most of them have gone home for Spring Break.”

Cheyenne rolls over on her elbow. “Did anyone stay? Or maybe do you know anyone else who lives in Pennsylvania? Or somewhere you could get to on the bus?”

Pels reaches for her phone, but the list of phone numbers in her contacts is small. She may have made friends, but she hasn’t exactly tried her hardest to connect with them.

She opens the group text with Shane and Jess. There have been more pictures since she last talked to them. The latest shows three large cats sleeping in a pile on top of Ángel.

“Oh my God, that’s so cute!” Cheyenne snatches the phone from Pels’s hands, squealing as she opens the photo stream for the chat and scrolls through the pictures. “Are they mountain lions? They’re adorable! Why are your friends hanging out with mountain lions?”

Pels grabs the phone back and uses pictures to explain. “The cats are Talented. The word for their Talent looks kind of like lynx, and they look like lynxes, so I’m going to go with that, because I’m not sure how it’s pronounced. That’s Ángel, and his boyfriend Tony, and those two are Tanner and Luca and that’s Hayley. Here’s a picture where they all look normal. And these are Jess and Shane.”

Cheyenne takes the phone back when Pels offers it, magnifying the pictures to get a closer look. “Jess is really pretty. She’s tall and like, totally solid. I love her hair and her freckles. Shane looks cute. Does he have a cane?”

“He broke his leg last January and it hasn’t really healed quite right.” Pels chews at her lip, not reaching out to take the phone back. “They are also pretty much literally the only people I think I can call.”

“Just call them,” Dad says. He plucks the phone from Cheyenne’s fingertips and drops it on Pels’s lap.

Cheyenne blinks. “I am guessing your Dad has opinions.”

“He usually does.” Pels picks up the phone as she lies back again, holding it above their heads. She presses the button to call Jess, and arranges the phone so the camera gets both her and Cheyenne lying side by side.

“Pels, hi!” Jess sounds surprised, and Pels can’t really blame her. She wouldn’t expect herself to call, either.

When the video comes on, it wobbles and shifts around until it’s set against something and is pointing at a bed in a dorm room where Ángel and Tony are sitting against the wall, and Shane’s on the floor. Jess flops on the floor next to Shane and waves. “Tanner borrowed Tony’s truck and he and Luca and Hayley went out to pick up pizza.”

“We will starve before they return,” Shane says dryly. “It’s already been an hour.”

“Why?” Cheyenne asks.

Pels is pretty sure she can guess the reason and it doesn’t have anything to do with the pizza. Her cheeks go hot when everyone else laughs. “It doesn’t matter,” she says quickly. “They’ll be back soon, I’m sure. I just—” She cuts off, not quite sure how to get started.

“It’s cool that you called,” Jess says easily. “Is that your little sister? Hey, Cheyenne, I’m Jess. Pels talks about you in our group chat.”

“Pels showed me pictures, but it’s really cool to meet you. Is it true that—ow.” Cheyenne rubs her side where Pels elbowed her. “Quit it.”

Ángel turns towards Tony, then leans closer to him as Tony murmurs something. Tony’s expression when he looks back at the camera is far more gentle than his rough looks would make Pels guess. For a moment, they both get very large in the screen as they climb over Jess and Shane to get off the bed, then they disappear from view. “Good to see you,” Ángel says from off-screen. “We’re going to go take a walk. Let Tony stretch his furry legs.”

There’s a low rumble, and a strangled laugh, and the door in the background bangs open as Jess and Shane both watch the action. Jess is laughing when she looks back at Pels. “Tony just bride-carried him out. Which is better than a fireman’s carry, but still, the look on Ángel’s face was priceless.”

Shane leans forward, picking up the phone and moving it closer, presumably on his lap so it’s looking up at him and Jess. “So, hey, Pels,” he says, his voice low and careful. “What’s up?”

“I’m supposed to get to know you.” She doesn’t know why it’s so hard to just say she needs help, but it is. It’s really hard to get the words out.

“And that’s why you’re calling with your little sister on the call?” Shane looks doubtful.

“Is everything okay?” Jess asks.

“No,” Cheyenne says firmly. “It’s not. Pels needs to go back to PHU right now.”

Jesus.

“Not right this second, Cheyenne. But yes, soon,” Pels admits. “Things are—it’s just not good here right now.”

There’s a loud car on the street, and for just a moment she thinks it might be Peter coming home. She drops the phone, scrambling to the window to look out, but a pickup truck rolls by, passing the driveway and continuing on.

“So, my dad and Pels got in a fight,” Cheyenne says, the phone in her hands now as she looks up at it. “He’s my dad, but not Pels’s dad—you should ask her about her dad sometime. Anyway, her and my dad don’t get along, and he doesn’t approve of her tattoo.” When Cheyenne says the words, Pels can almost hear the quotations around “tattoo” as if she’s trying to get them to talk about the soul marks. “Then things started rattling and when stuff like that happens—”

“I always get blamed.” Pels gets back on the bed and into view of the camera quickly. “It’s usually my fault. Kind of.”

“This time it wasn’t, but my dad doesn’t know that.”

“And in order to keep everything from getting out of hand, he’s pissed off enough that we think everything would go back to status quo if I weren’t here making it worse,” Pels says quickly. She knows they need to talk about it more, but she doesn’t want Mom to overhear them talking about Cheyenne’s Talent. It’s obvious that Mom isn’t ready for it, and there’s no point in taking the risk.

“I don’t have friends here,” Pels adds, when Jess and Shane are strangely silent. They glance at each other, and she wonders if they can have silent conversations. They’re best friends; maybe they’ve developed that almost telepathy some friends have. “We moved into this house right before I started at PHU. If I didn’t have GPS, I’d be constantly lost, especially since Mom has me driving Cheyenne around. The only person outside of this house whose name I actually know is Lonnie, the guy at the Coffee Shack.”

“I wonder if they’d be jealous if you told them he was flirting with you?” Dad muses.

“Shut up, Dad,” Pels snaps.

Cheyenne giggles.

Jess’s mouth is slightly open, staring at the phone. Shane looks as if he’s trying to see around the edges of the image. “Do you have someone else there?” Shane asks.

Pels puts a hand over Cheyenne’s mouth. “It is a long and complicated story. Just remember, if I say Dad, it’s—not an awful thing. If Cheyenne says Dad, she means Peter, and he’s the one who doesn’t like me.”

“Noted,” Jess says.

Cheyenne shoves Pels’s hand away. “Short version is Pels needs you guys to rescue her. So can she come home and stay with you?”

Jess makes the funny little fish face again, her mouth opening and closing while her cheeks go red under the freckles. Shane says something to her that’s too quiet for the microphone, and Jess shakes her head quickly. “I’m fine,” she insists. “I’m just going to grab a water bottle. I’ll be right back. You want one? Of course you want one. Shane. Not Pels. I can’t exactly give you a water bottle through the phone line.” She disappears from view quickly.

Shane’s expression goes soft and amused. “You’re ridiculous.”

A water bottle lands on the bed next to him. “Shut up,” Jess says from off-screen.

Cheyenne still has the phone in her hands, so she sits up, cradling it in her lap to look down. “The pictures of the cats were really cool,” she says. “Pels said they’re lynxes.”

“Lince,” Shane says, and Pels is relieved she didn’t try to pronounce it because it sounds more like linn-chay than lynx. “They’re a type of shapeshifter with only one form, and don’t call them Clan; Tony growls every time it comes up. It’s the only type of Talent I’ve ever seen where one person can call it out of someone else, which is why Tanner’s now a cat.”

Pels is sure there’s a story there, and she is equally sure that Cheyenne is going to get Shane to tell it. By the time she tries to decide whether it’s worth rerouting the conversation back to the rescue mission, Shane’s already deep into a discussion of how there was a twenty-two hour truck ride that ended with one of them becoming a cat.

There are pieces left out. There have to be, because it doesn’t fully make sense.

That doesn’t seem to matter to Cheyenne, who simply nods along with all of it. “So Tony and Ángel are soulmates and who else is?” she asks.

“Ángel and Hayley are the ones who did the original ritual,” Shane explains. “They thought they were going to be soulmates, but then everything went a little wrong. Ángel still brought Hayley home for winter break, though, and she met his best friend Tanner and they turned out to be soulmates, and now Luca’s their boyfriend. And Ángel ended up finding out Tony’s his soulmate, and really, it’s all far better matchups.”

Jess flops back on the bed, a bottle of water in hand that’s already half gone. Her cheeks are still faintly flushed, and her ponytail’s been pulled loose so her auburn hair is in dark waves around her face. “They make each other more stable,” she says. “Ángel and Hayley were like the same person sometimes. But Tony’s got a serious side that helps keep Ángel rooted in reality. And Tanner and Hayley balance well, too, and they make an anchor for Luca.”

“But the spell made them fall in love?” Cheyenne asks. “I mean, isn’t that kind of—”

“Popular misconception, but no.” Shane meets Pels’s gaze through the screen. “Magic can’t make you fall in love. All it can do is point out that someone might be a perfect match, but all the rest of it is up to you.”

Pels makes a noise rather than saying anything in reply. She rubs at her wrist, still uncertain, because this just seems messed up. “Aren’t soulmates supposed to be two people,” she mutters, not bothering to phrase it as a question.

“Ángel’s abuela has two marks,” Jess says. “She didn’t actually get together with both, but she loved both. Soulmates are different for different people. Like Rory’s mark is huge, trying to encapsulate Kit, and they balance each other perfectly. Then there’s Tanner and Hayley, and they’ve got Luca, and there’s no mark for him, but he’s part of their life, and Luca called Tanner’s cat.”

“So no, it’s not weird to have multiple soulmates,” Shane says, his tone very careful. “What happened with my mark is definitely different, but apparently magic likes to do things its own way.”

“Especially around Shane.” Jess knocks into him with her shoulder. “Since his innate ability is Chaos.”

“And if you had a Talent, your innate ability would be stable math,” Shane counters.

“It sounds like you two should totally be soulmates, if balance matters that much,” Cheyenne says with a soft laugh.

“Except for the fact that I am very much a lesbian, and apparently the equation includes Pels,” Jess replies.

Pels can feel the warmth rising in her face again. She’s pretty sure she’s supposed to respond somehow here. Either she should be encouraging, or discouraging, or something in between but there are no words that feel right on her tongue.

“You could just go with it,” Dad points out, and Pels turns to glare over her shoulder at him.

“So,” Cheyenne says, a little too loudly. “We need to figure out how we’re going to get Pels back to PHU.”

“And where I’m going to stay when I get there. Because I didn’t sign up to say I’d be there over break, so I’m locked out of the dorm until Saturday. It’s only Wednesday,” Pels points out. If money weren’t an issue, the travel would be easy. It’s sleeping space that’s hard.

Shane and Jess look at each other. “Sleeping space is slightly complicated because of all the cats,” Jess says slowly. “But we’ll work something out, we promise. You won’t be stuck sleeping on a park bench in the winter.”

“I’ve actually napped on those benches on the Quad,” Shane muses. “But it was a lot warmer. There was this one senior—my RA last year—who used to tell stories about camping out under the bushes. Apparently there’s a place where you can get under this ring of hemlocks—I’m not even sure where he’s talking about on campus. But it’s like a pine fort, and he’d go sleep outside there. On the other hand, he’s Clan, so I’m not sure he really cared about the weather or being outside in it.”

Jess elbows him. “We will find a place indoors, with heat and a bed, for Pels to stay,” she says firmly. “What about getting here?”

“I took the bus home, and can take it back, but my ticket isn’t until Saturday.” Pels goes to her bag and digs through it, pulling out the information before returning to the bed and in view of the camera. “It looks like there’s a fee to change it, and I can’t exactly ask Mom to change the booking.”

“I’ll take care of it,” Shane offers. “Just text me the information, and I’ll get it changed.”

“If she can go tomorrow morning while I’m at school, I can totally play dumb about it,” Cheyenne says. “Pels, you need the car to get to the bus station, don’t you?”

Pels nods. “Which means the car will be stuck at the station, and Mom and Peter will be pissed off about it. Do you think you can get Mom to the station to pick it up somehow without Peter getting involved? I don’t want there to be any backlash on you.”

Cheyenne pats her hand. “I can cry on demand, and you’ll be abandoning me. I will absolutely play dumb for you. Besides, I think Mom might be more on your side than you think.”

Pels thinks back over every time Mom’s forced her to wear the right clothes, act the right way, and hasn’t believed her when she’s talked about Talent. “Yeah, I don’t think so.”

“I think she’s right,” Dad says quietly. “Your mother was different when we were together. I’m sure that person is still in there.”

That’s a rabbit hole Pels wants to slide down, asking Dad about the past. But he never lets her dig into the details, and she has to be satisfied with the tiny random nuggets he drops like that one. So she shrugs, and grabs the phone from Cheyenne, using it to send the details of how to change it to the group text with Shane and Jess.

There’s a bang in the background of a door slamming open. “Hey there!” a voice calls cheerfully, and Pels thinks it might be Hayley. “We’re back with pizza. Where did Tony and Ángel go?”

“I think they’re on the phone.” A quieter voice, then murmuring in the background.

Jess wiggles her fingers in invitation, and three people enter the view. “Wave at Pels and her little sister, Cheyenne,” Jess orders. “This is Tanner, and Luca. You know Hayley.”

Barely. And she recognizes the other two from pictures. Luca’s taller than Tanner, and has one arm slung across his shoulder, leaning in like he has to touch him. Tanner’s hair sticks up every which way, but he’s also carrying four boxes of pizza, and a bag that Pels figures has wings in it.

“We should let you go,” Pels says quickly. “Just… text me when everything’s all set. We’ll figure out what to do on our side. Bye.”

“Is everything okay?”

Pels touches the button to disconnect the call while Hayley’s still speaking, then tosses her phone onto the charger so it’ll be ready to go in the morning. “I should pack.”

Cheyenne pulls her feet up as she sits up, arms around her legs, hunching over with her chin on her knees. “I’m going to miss you,” she says quietly. “Peter’s going to be okay, though. I mean. I think he’ll—”

“He’ll be glad that I’m gone.” Pels finishes the sentence for her. “I know, and I wouldn’t be leaving like this if I didn’t think that. Mom will think she’s failed, and it’s kind of a failure of the whole nuclear family unit thing, but he also can’t stand me, and he hates when I’m weird and different and act like I’ve got the devil in me. Which… I guess I do, but I also have a guardian angel, and well. He’s never going to understand.”

She grabs her dirty laundry from the last few days, shoving it into her laundry bag on one side of her bag. She looks at the few clothes she’d brought home, and the new dresses mom gave her with the leggings. Which were actually kind of comfortable, and a halfway decent compromise. Mom was trying.

Pels packs everything she can except for her toiletries, then lays out one of the soft dresses and a pair of leggings, along with her boots for tomorrow. She has to keep up the illusion, otherwise Mom will know something is up in the morning.

“I like them,” Cheyenne says. “I think you should go for it.” Because of course she’s still thinking about Shane and Jess.

“It’s not that easy.”

“It is that easy,” Dad counters. “All you have to do is reach out and try.”

Pels glares angrily at him. “No, Dad, it’s not that easy. I meant what I said. I don’t know how. I don’t make friends easily, and part of that is your fault. It’s really hard to make friends when I’m always moving, and always having things go haywire, and sometimes I look like I’m drunk because you’re trying to push me to do something. Literally. Although that time you made the annoying bird fly away wasn’t bad. I mean. There are times when you help. Yes. That’s good. But still. It’s not easy.”

Cheyenne’s eyebrows are high. “I take it your dad agrees with me?”

“Shocking to say, but yes, now I have two of you bugging me.” Pels flops down on the bed, curling up and pulling her pillow over her head. “Maybe it’s easy for you, but that’s not me. I don’t know how to make friends. It’s so—vulnerable. It could go wrong. I could suddenly have to leave when Peter decides he’s not paying for PHU anymore. Everything could change tomorrow.”

“I died,” Dad says flatly. “And that didn’t stop me from falling in love.”

“You didn’t know you were going to die when you fell in love with her,” Pels yells, her voice muffled by the pillow. “God. Both of you. Just. Let me do it on my own time. I don’t know what I want. I don’t know if I like boys. Or if I like girls. Or if I like those two people in particular. Or even one of them. I don’t even know them. I don’t know anything.”

“In order to find out, you’re going to have to try,” Cheyenne says. “If you want to cry on my shoulder, I’ll be here. I may be young, but I’m a good listener.” She pats Pels’s shoulder gently, then lies down next to her. “You always take care of me. I can take care of you, too, now. I’m old enough. I know how scary it is to like someone.”

As if her fledgling crush on Adric is anywhere near the same scope as Pels suddenly having soulmates and a permanent marking telling the world about them. Pels sucks in a breath, letting it shudder out as she exhales.

“I’ll always listen, too,” Dad says quietly. She feels his hand on her forehead, light and careful, somehow touching her through the pillow. Well. Ghost. Of course he can do that. “I’ll be with you as long as you need me.”

That implies that there might be a time when she won’t need him anymore, or when he thinks she doesn’t, and he leaves. And for all that she rails against him all the time, that’s a chilling thought.

“I’ll think about it,” she mutters into the blankets. Seriously. That’s all they can ask of her and they’re going to have to be satisfied. She’s not doing this at anyone’s pace but her own.

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Fic UPDATE! Wide River to Cross: Homecoming

Author’s Note: So close. We're so close now, dear readers. Thanks for sticking with me this far; not much longer now. I promise. As you'll see from the events in this chapter, it will be impossible to prolong the agony. (Who remembers the actual agony while watching Season 7, wondering what had happened between Jack and Lisa? I remember that agony...) All that aside, the good part about how long this story has taken me is that plot lines that have occurred down the line can be worked in, and they can make some semblance of sense. I hope. Anyway, here's the latest chapter.

Chapter 22: Homecoming

In the darkness of night, the tree-lined drive seemed eerily foreign to Lisa as the town car bore both her and Rachel to their familial estate. Though it was a view she had seen thousands of times in her life, this particular return to Fairfield granted her no trace of comfort or sense of homecoming. It was bordering on close to ten months that she had been absent—one of the longest spells she had been away since her past marriage to Dan and subsequent move to the USA.

Lisa could not help but recall other lengthy absences from Fairfield, particularly in her adolescence when she had attended boarding school in France with Rachel. While she had enjoyed those times away—thanks to her love of French culture and many outings with her doting Aunt Evelyn—the inevitable homesickness was alleviated only upon return. Now, she felt like a stranger returning to a strange place, creeping in like some interloper.

Like a thief in the night, she thought to herself wryly, fighting the encroaching discomposure without much success.

“We’re here, Rach,” Lisa whispered, giving her younger sibling a gentle nudge.

“Huh? Oh, thanks,” Rachel mumbled sleepily. “I didn’t realise I nodded off.”

She smiled slightly, watching as Rachel rubbed bleary eyes before finishing off with a long yawn. Rachel had endured only one flight; Lisa had needed three to return to Alberta. Exhaustion was indeed beginning to overwhelm her, but there was a nervous tension buzzing through her veins, keeping her on an unusual level of alertness. Now that she was back in Hudson, the mere thought of being in the same town as Jack—and potentially encountering him anywhere—set her mind spinning. How would such a meeting play out? What words could pass her lips to express to him all that was in her heart? What words, if any, would he have to say to her?

Security lights illuminated the exteriors of the stables, dispelling the shadows. Night checks would have already been completed by this hour. All was quiet now, though Lisa knew Harry Wilkes would probably still be up in his office, burning the midnight oil while waiting for their arrival.

Good ol’ Harry, Lisa thought with affection. He had been such a constant presence in her life since she was a little girl, working his way up from the very bottom as a stable hand to head groomsman. Matthew Stillman had come to trust the man with just about everything, and Lisa had done the same. Harry was dedicated to the care of the horses in a way that went beyond what was expected of a mere hired hand. Anyone else would have retired from the position by now, but Harry was still logging the same hours as he had during the past forty-five years as a Fairfield employee. He had been there through the lean years and through the successful ones.

Without her realising it, a long pout pulled at Lisa’s face as the car pulled to a stop in front of the sprawling ranch house. She knew Harry was not thrilled with the idea of her selling Fairfield, even though he was guaranteed a handsome severance package. The rest of the staff might be keen on staying on with new owners; Harry would not—Lisa was certain of that.

“Why the long face?” Rachel asked, looking over at her. “Something wrong?”

“Hmm?” Lisa shook herself. “Oh, no. It’s just that... I-I don’t think Harry is pleased with my decision to sell, that’s all.”

“So Harry’s still working here, eh?” Rachel said, lips quirking into a lop-sided smile. “Dad really lucked out when he hired him. He’s been here since before I was even born. Good ol’ Harry.”

“I honestly don’t think I could have managed without him when Dad got sick,” Lisa mused out loud.

Sure enough, the door to the Fairfield business offices opened to reveal the man in question, silhouetted against the interior lights. He waved jauntily at them, and Lisa intuited he was intent on helping them unload their luggage.

“C’mon,” she said to Rachel as she opened her door. “Let’s get out before he gets the idea we’re going to let him carry everything into the house. He’s been up all night waiting; he’s got to be tired after working all day.”

“Right,” Rachel said in agreement, though she was staving off another yawn of exhaustion.

“Ah, the two prettiest girls in Hudson have made their triumphant return,” Harry greeted them affectionately; paternally.

“Oh, Harry,” Lisa said with a chagrined laugh, “I don’t know about ‘triumphant’, and after travelling all day, we look like something the cat dragged in.”

“Ha! Speak for yourself, sis,” Rachel interjected merrily. “Harry, flattery gets you everywhere. It’s good to see you.”

“Likewise, Rachel.”

The three gathered for a warm group hug. As Lisa guessed moments earlier, the next words out of Harry’s mouth were an offer to bring their luggage inside.

“No, no, you take it easy Harry,” Lisa quickly stated. “You’ve had a long day, too. Rachel and I can manage just fine.”

“Nonsense,” Harry said, reaching for the largest of the pieces the chauffeur had just deposited from the trunk. “Your father would be horrified if he saw me standing by idly while you two dragged all this stuff by yourselves.”

“Chivalry isn’t dead in Hudson, I see,” Rachel quipped, following the older man with her carry-on and a smaller suitcase.

“Thanks, Harry,” Lisa said after everything was sitting in the spacious foyer.

“Happy to do it, Lisa,” Harry said. “Welcome home.”

“Yeah... for however long that’s going to be,” Lisa sighed.

“It’s going to be hard seeing this place go,” Harry uttered with a wistful air. “Fairfield has been a big part of Hudson ever since you made it the success it’s become, Lisa. This town won’t be the same without it—or you.”

Not unkindly, Lisa asked: “Is this your way of trying to talk me out of selling?”

Harry shrugged. “Maybe. I know an old fella like me who’s on his way to retirement can’t interfere with the business decisions of his boss, but you know this place has always been more than just a ’job’ for me.”

“I know,” Lisa said warmly, reaching out to touch his arm in a show of understanding. “And I thank you for everything you’ve done from the day my father hired you to this present time.”

“You’re welcome,” he said, placing a hand over hers for a few moments. “I should be on my way. See you in the morning.”

“Of course.”

Harry turned to make his exit, but hesitated on the threshold. “There is something...”

Lisa waited expectantly. “What is it?” she asked when he did not continue.

“Hmmph. Nah, it can wait ‘til tomorrow,” he muttered. “Goodnight, ladies.”

“’Bye,” Rachel said, trying to suppress another yawn.

“Goodnight, Harry,” Lisa said, closing the door behind him, slightly perturbed by the man’s cryptic parting words. Whatever it was, she would learn of it the next day.

--

As cranky as Jack was at the notion of having the woolly creatures on his land, Georgie’s 4H Club project meant sheep at Heartland was good for something. At least the kid could learn about the rearing of an animal she could handle. Lambs weren’t liable to trample you, gore you, buck you off, or kick you in the head. It was decidedly not fun chasing down the specific lamb Georgie and Olivia wanted, especially since they could not agree on which one was the best one for their needs. Jack half-suspected they were changing their fickle minds on purpose, just for the spectacle of his sprawling about in the grass and weeds, grabbing at this lamb or that lamb.  

It should have been Tim’s job seeing after the sheep, but he picked that very week to head to Moose Jaw to visit with his son, Shane, so they could spend Thanksgiving together. Why was it his ex-son-in-law continued to be such an irritant and an imposition in his life? If not for Lou and Amy, the man would never again have darkened the door at Heartland.

After Georgie and Olivia finally settled on a lamb and Jack successfully secured it, he decided a little break was necessary. It was no use getting worked up over the flock again; also, the girls did not need his grumpy mood to ruin things for them. It was trial enough for Georgie to be partnered with Olivia, he knew, so he did his best to keep his cool while in their company.

Once inside the kitchen, he brewed a cup of tea and eased into a chair in the living room—the kitchen having been taken over by Peter and his laptop. The man really needed office space of some kind while he was here, Jack mused.

Why Tim felt the need to saddle his son-in-law with the nickname “The General” was beyond Jack, but then again, Tim knew exactly how to push other people’s buttons. The recent fiasco involving Tricia and her near-delinquent daughter, Jade, at the fishing cabin was a fine example of that.  

Jack sipped at his tea, trying to resolve in his mind yet again why Tim possessed such an unbridled sense of entitlement. He lacked what Jack’s grandmother would have called social graces. His unsolicited comments could be tactless. The frustrating thing was that such comments were often uncomfortable truths no one else wanted to face or accept.

When Tim had first asked how the Arizona trip had been, Jack recalled initially telling him to mind his own business. Tim, ignoring Jack’s desire for privacy had asked, point-blank:

“You missed Lisa, didn’t you?”

”Didn’t I tell you to mind your own business?!” Jack had retorted. “I had a swell time.”

”You’re not fooling me, old man. What did you do with yourself down there the whole time? You couldn’t have been having that much of a ‘swell time’ because you cut it short and came home a week early!”

“I did happen to have some good times, thank you very much!”

“Yeah? Doing what?” Tim had challenged.

“Saddleback trip. Lookin’ at real estate. Meeting nice people. Camping and fishing.”

“Meeting nice people and fishing, eh? Catch anything good down there in Arizona?” Tim asked suggestively.

“As a matter of fact, yes. I hooked a very nice catfish.”

“Oooh! A catfish!” Tim had crooned, pretending to be impressed. “How big was it?”

Knowing he would not be able to lie any further, Jack had groaned in annoyance and decided it was time to cease this line of questioning. “Dunno,” he had sullenly replied. “It pulled free from the hook before I could reel it in. The sun was going down by then. I quit trying after that.”

“Ha!” Tim had laughed triumphantly. “Dinner out of a can that night, right?”

Jack grit his teeth. “No, I forgot to bring a can opener. Are you done, now?”

“You ‘forgot’ to bring a can opener?” Tim crowed in derision. “So why didn’t you just use your knife to open the can, or did you forget to bring a knife, too?”

“Oh, would you just shut up already!”

Jack stalked off and was thus out of earshot when a gleeful, self-righteous Tim muttered, “Ohhh, he totally missed Lisa.”

--

It was already after 10:00 a.m. when Lisa awoke on Saturday morning. The inevitable jet-lag felt especially pronounced this time around, and she groaned when she realised the lateness of the hour. She so wanted to soak up a few more hours of sleep, but knew work was waiting. There was the matter Harry mentioned the night before which she wanted to get to the bottom of, but the first order of business absolutely had to be contacting the real estate agent.

After a quick shower, she shared a hurried breakfast with Rachel. Her sister was still drowsy and not much in the mood to talk while they ate. When Rachel drifted back to bed for a nap, Lisa finally got on the phone to the realtor, glad they were indeed open that day despite it being a holiday long weekend. After all those months in France of dithering on this, it felt almost anti-climactic the sale would finally be happening. The deed is done, Lisa thought after hanging up. She was not sure what emotions she was experiencing now that Fairfield would officially be on the market.

Ruefully, she thought, I really should call Dan and tell him the ‘good’ news. In all truth, her ex-husband was the last person she wanted to speak to after all their less-than-pleasant email correspondences over the past several months. I wonder what Jack would think if I called him and told him I was back in Hudson? Lisa stopped herself cold. Where did that thought come from?! I would have to explain to him that I’m finally selling the old place and moving to France for good, wouldn’t I? I’d have to come up with some excuse as to why I didn’t even tell him I was coming back.

She stood from behind her desk and decided it was time to check in on Harry, brushing aside any further thoughts of both of her exes.

“Ah, Lisa! Good morning,” Harry greeted Lisa brightly when she knocked on the business office door.

“Good morning, Harry. I just got off the phone with the real estate people. Someone’s going to be by later this week to properly assess the property and get some signs posted and such.”

“Of course,” he said with a nod of understanding.

“Harry, about that thing you mentioned last night...”

“Oh, yes. That,” Harry said, lowering his voice.

Lisa caught his tone, and interpreted he was about to tell her something she would not particularly enjoy hearing. “Well, what is it?”

“It’s Dan,” Harry said in a manner that spoke volumes of disapproval.

“Dan? What’s he done now?” Lisa asked guardedly.

“You’d better follow me,” Harry said, rising from his seat.

He led Lisa out to the stables where they stopped in front of Fairfield Flyer’s stall. The champion racer seemed strong and healthy, and Lisa looked at her head groomsman, awaiting an explanation.

“Dan and some of his people and vets have been here to see Flyer and Rhapsody quite a few times while you were gone,” Harry started. “Since you have joint ownership, of course I couldn’t stop him.”

“Stop him from doing what?” Lisa asked, instantly on edge. Rhapsody was one of her broodmares.

“From getting all kinds of lab work done—and cell samples taken from Flyer.”

“Cell samples...” Lisa mused out loud.

Harry continued. “Rhapsody is already nine months pregnant. You had no idea, did you?” he asked warily as he studied her reaction. “Don’t answer that. Your expression tells me all I need to know.”

Lisa felt her cheeks flush. “I always did have a lousy poker face,” she grumbled.

“Ah, I should have known he didn’t tell you, but you know I’m not the type to interfere,” a contrite Harry said. “And given the nature of what he was doing, I wasn’t sure if you were both keeping it a secret, or what. Sorry, Lisa.”

“Don’t apologize; this isn’t remotely your fault. It seems I have a call to make to my ‘business partner’. Thanks, Harry.”

She strode out of the stables, absolutely steaming, trying to decide how best to have this conversation with Dan. Cell samples? That could only mean one thing, Lisa concluded, coupled with Dan’s recent talk about getting into horse cloning. He was trying to warm me up to the idea, she now realised.

“Where do you get off cloning Fairfield Flyer without even consulting with me first?!” Lisa exploded when she had Dan on the line.

“Now hold on just a minute, Lisa—” Dan tried to interrupt.

“No, you hold on; I’m not finished,” Lisa hissed through clenched teeth. “Harry told me you’ve been out to Fairfield to see Flyer and Rhapsody. This is the real reason you’ve been so demanding about the finances, isn’t it? You weren’t concerned about the Avignon facility—you were paying to have Flyer cloned. How many other horses did you have lined up for the procedure?”

From Dan’s silence, Lisa knew she had hit the nail on the head.

“When were you going to tell me?” Lisa fumed. “When were you going to tell me the Avignon deal was all a sham and that you were really using my investment funds to clone Flyer and God knows how many others?”

“Okay, simmer down,” Dan said, trying to placate her. “Avignon is still a go. But the focus has shifted slightly. It could be the best equine cloning facility in Europe, Lisa. If the clone of Flyer is a success, we’re going to take it to Avignon as the poster boy for the procedure in race horses. We’d be one of the first out of the gate doing this. We could make history, Lisa, because the Racing Association is bound to come around once more people get on board.”

“Have you lost your mind?” Lisa had to keep herself from shouting. “You go behind my back, and-and then try to tell me you’re shifting the focus of the breeding facility we planned in France?”

“All that stuff you learned in that Lexington conference about performance markers is great, Lisa,” Dan said, “but that’s yesterday’s science. Cloning is the future. Do you really want to be left behind?”

Lisa realised she was still too angry to have a rational talk with Dan. “Let’s table that question,” she finally said. “I just got into Hudson late last night, and I’m too tired to deal with this right now. But make no mistake, Dan, I’m not impressed you went behind my back.”

“Fair enough, fair enough,” Dan said, sounding almost relieved. “Hang on, did you just say you’re back in Hudson?”

Lisa clenched her teeth in irritation. “How else do you think I found out about Flyer?”

“Uhhh—Harry told you, didn’t he?”

“Of course Harry told me,” snapped Lisa, relishing the discomfort she heard in Dan’s voice. He sounded as if he were a guilty schoolboy.

“I see,” Dan said in resignation. “Wait, if you’re in Hudson, does that mean you’ve finally put Fairfield on the market?”

“Yes, Dan, you’ll be happy to know I took care of that chore before calling you,” Lisa replied testily.

“Good! That’s great!” Dan exclaimed. “Finally. Look, Lisa, I get you’re upset about the cloning thing. You’re right; I should have included you in that decision. But Flyer is mine, too. I think in time, you’ll see—”

“Ah, but Rhapsody is mine,” Lisa cut in. “You’re still on shaky ground, Dan. As I said just now, we’ll discuss this later. You’ll be lucky if I don’t decide to involve my lawyer with this one.”

She heard his exhalation of discontent, but she frankly did not care. Misappropriation of funds, she thought. Yeah, that has a nice ring to it.

“Come on, Lisa. Are you really going to split hairs like that?” he whined. “Aren’t we business partners in this whole breeding venture?”

It took all the control she could muster not to slam down the phone. Instead, she took a steadying breath before responding. “That didn’t give you the right to use Rhapsody for your cloning experiment without consulting with me first. But what’s done is done. Like I said, I’m not in the mood to discuss this right now. Goodbye.”

Lisa did not wait to hear Dan respond before she hung up the call.

Rachel, having awakened from her nap, was sitting at the breakfast nook in the kitchen, flipping through an old edition of the Hudson Times. When Lisa wandered in, Rachel glanced up and said, “Uh-oh. I know that look. Something’s got you mad.”

Lisa groaned. “Ugh. What tipped you off?”

Rachel smirked. “Yeah, see, there’s this vein that always pops out on your forehead whenever you blow a gasket,” she answered, motioning to her own head.

Grumbling, Lisa swiped a self-conscious hand over her face.

“Hey, it’s not like you get mad often, sis,” Rachel said, trying to lighten the mood. “It must be something big.”

Lisa plopped down wearily across from Rachel. “It’s Dan,” she began. “He’s gone and tried to clone one of my best racers—Fairfield Flyer—without even asking me, first.”

“Oh, wow. Is that even legal?” Rachel asked, folding the paper and putting it aside. “I’m not up on my horse cloning ethics.”

“It is legal,” Lisa said, “but it’s damned expensive, comes with a pile of risk factors, and the Racing Association has yet to accept clones in sanctioned races.”

“Didn’t I read something a couple years ago about clones being accepted for show jumping in the Olympics?” asked Rachel.

Lisa nodded. “Yes. The Fédération Equestre Internationale did announce clones could be entered for equestrian events. I still don’t know what Dan was thinking, though. Flyer is a racer, not a jumper, or dressage. It’s infuriating. And it’s not even about the ethics when it comes to cloning; it’s that Dan was hounding me for months to get Fairfield sold so we could get going on an operation out of Avignon.”

“Avignon?” repeated Rachel.

“Yes. You know I always wanted to retire to France, eventually.”

“Right...”

“Anyway,” Lisa continued, “I sold my share of the Dude Ranch back to Lou, and assumed those funds were going towards funding that Avignon operation. Obviously, Dan was funnelling all of it to help make the payments for the cloning procedure.” She let out another huff of frustration; Rachel eyed her with pity.

“C’mon, Lisa,” Rachel said after several moments of silence. “In the end, a horse is a horse, and we both know you love horses. When Rhapsody foals, you’re going to love that clone. So forget Dan, and focus on making sure Rhapsody stays healthy through the rest of the pregnancy.”

The words were like a thunderbolt, bringing a much-needed dose of reality. Lisa stared at Rachel for a few moments, speechless. “Are you sure you’re the younger sister, here?” she eventually asked with an affectionate smile and shake of her head. “When did you get to be so wise?”

“Oh, I have my moments,” Rachel answered airily.

“Well, I hope there’s more wisdom where that came from,” Lisa said, “because even though you’re right about loving it when it arrives, I get the feeling that clone is going to become more like a monkey on my back.”

--

Thanksgiving at Heartland was slightly less crowded than usual owing to the absences of Tim and Lou. Everyone was thankful for Jack’s surviving the heart attack and for Amy’s health and recovery after her recent scare with Zeus; Georgie was thankful in particular for her new family and for Phoenix.

At Fairfield, the celebration was slightly more subdued. Figuring this to be their final Thanksgiving together before the family farm passed into new hands, the Stillman sisters spent much of that holiday Monday* reminiscing about older, happier times, and some not-so-happy times, too.

“I used to love it when Aunt Evelyn would come to visit from wherever she had last been,” Lisa remarked as they sat together in the cozy living room, a roaring fire burning in the hearth.

“Remember her second husband?” Rachel snickered.

“Ah, yes. Uncle Merrill,” Lisa said. “With those massive sideburns we always wished he would shave off.”

“Where did she meet him, again?”

“Wales, I think,” Lisa replied. “But he was from Scotland.”

“He claimed he was some Scottish lord, right?” asked Rachel. “I seem to remember that.”

Lisa nodded seriously. “He apparently had the bank account to prove it, or so Aunt Evelyn told me.”

“Well, she was married to him the longest,” Rachel said.

“That’s true,” Lisa said, taking a sip of cider.

“Until he left her for a newer, younger model,” Rachel said.

“And she took him to the cleaners,” chortled Lisa. “Then promptly found herself another millionaire boyfriend.”

“That one didn’t last very long, did it?”

“Oh, a couple years, maybe? Then she had a few other gentlemen friends whose names I forget. Then she married Charles, the wealthy stockbroker from New York. They met on a cruise ship. Divorced him after five years.”

“Aunt Evelyn is addicted to men and to money,” Rachel said. “And I mean that in the nicest possible way.”

“Rachel, there is no nice way to call someone a gold digger,” Lisa said, a peal of laughter breaking forth.

“Ha! You said it; not me!”

“All right, Aunt Evelyn may have her... flaws... but she’s always been good to us,” Lisa said sincerely.

“Yeah... you’re right,” Rachel said. “Though you’re her favourite, you know.”

Lisa cocked her head and frowned at her sister, puzzled by this comment. “Naw. She totally spoiled us both. What d’you mean by that?”

“Oh, nothing.” Rachel waved a hand dismissively. “I just got the feeling like she doted on you a little more. That’s all.”

“What? Why?”

Rachel stared at her older sister, considering for a few moments how to proceed. She blew out a breath and said, “Okay, remember that horse you had when we were kids? Silver?”

“Yes,” Lisa said, thinking of the dapple grey mare she got as a rescue. She put aside her mug, sensing Rachel was about to say something she had been wanting to say for a long time, but never had the chance to get it off her chest.

“I remember when Silver got sick a few years later,” Rachel said. “Dad didn’t think he could afford to pay for the surgery.”

“That’s right,” Lisa confirmed. “It was colic. Silver was getting old by that point, so Dad didn’t think the risk was worth it.”

“You know, I didn’t even have my own horse at the time, and Aunt Evelyn swooped in and said she’d pay for the surgery,” Rachel said, voice tainted with the slightest stain of bitterness. “You were seven when you got Silver. I remember, because I thought somehow that’s what I would get when I turned seven, too. Funny, isn’t it? We lived on a horse-breeding farm, and I didn’t get my own horse until I was ten.”

“Rachel, it’s a stupid question... did you even really want your own horse?” Lisa asked carefully.

Rachel rolled her eyes. “Of course I wanted my own horse,” she said. “What little girl living in Hudson didn’t ‘want’ her own horse?”

“I know, but ‘wanting’ a horse isn’t the same as loving that horse when you finally get it, is it?”

Lisa thought back to when Rachel did receive her own horse the Christmas after she turned ten, a gift from Evelyn. In the beginning, the girl had been ecstatic, but the excitement had waned, and the horse was sometimes neglected.

“No, it isn’t the same thing,” admitted Rachel. “Look, I don’t mean to sound petty. At the time, I was jealous; I admit it. When I was younger, I thought Aunt Evelyn paying for Silver’s surgery when I didn’t even have my own horse meant she loved you more and was ignoring me.”

“I’m sorry, Rach,” Lisa said sincerely. “I had no idea you felt that way.”

“Like I said, I felt that way when I was younger. I thought having a horse would make me happy the way it seemed to make you happy; like it made other girls around town happy,” Rachel said. “It wasn’t until later I realised I wasn’t actually a horse-crazy girl like everyone else.”

“No, you were more boy-crazy,” Lisa said, a small smile twitching her lips.

“Ohhh, was I ever,” Rachel said, throwing back her head and casting her eyes to the ceiling.

“Do you ever regret leaving home when you did?” Lisa queried. “I mean, do you ever wish you had waited until you were a little more settled? Aunt Evelyn was willing to pay for your post-secondary education anywhere in the world like she did for me, you know.”

“Yeah, I know. And I keep saying that the timing was probably wrong,” Rachel said. “But I always come back to Ben. He’s the reason I don’t have regrets about that. I love my son more than my own life, Lisa. If I do regret anything is that his childhood probably wasn’t as happy as it could have been because of my stupid relationship mistakes.”

“Well, from what I can see, he’s grown into a fine young man, Rachel,” Lisa said, thinking of the rough patch Ben went through during Rachel’s train wreck of a divorce. “He’s learned some valuable life lessons and he’s working hard now to achieve his goals.”

“I admit I’m proud of him,” Rachel said with a smile. “I’m sorry again for dumping him on you—”

“Oh, stop!” Lisa put up a hand. “We’ve been over this a hundred times. Even though I could have done a better job when he was here, it made me realise raising a child isn’t a cakewalk.”

“No, but it is worth it,” Rachel said. “I look at Ben, and I think at least I did something right in the world.”

“Yeah...” Lisa said softly.

“He did appreciate his time here, Lisa,” Rachel said, getting an inkling of where Lisa’s thoughts might have carried her at that moment.

“I hope so,” Lisa uttered. “Though somehow, I think I acted a little more like Aunt Evelyn: dropping expensive gifts instead of making any meaningful impact on his life that would actually matter.”

“I don’t see it that way at all,” Rachel countered. “You give from the heart, Lisa. You’ve always been the generous type. And with Fairfield’s success came bigger ways to show that generosity. To be honest, I was a bit jealous of your giving nature, too.”

“And if I’m going to be honest, I was a bit jealous of you,” Lisa said seriously.

“Of me?” Rachel said, clearly shocked. “Whatever for?”

“You left home. Had a child. You... didn’t have the weight of responsibility for Fairfield that I had,” Lisa admitted. “I have loved building up the business into the success it is today, but I also thought kids would naturally come along when I was married to Dan. When that didn’t happen, I thought about you and how easy it seemed for you.”

“It wasn’t easy at all, especially when Gary walked out on us,” stated Rachel emphatically. “And I thought I’d have more kids too, when the ex-who-shall-not-be-named came into the picture and seemed like he’d be a great step-father to Ben. We all know how that turned out.”

Lisa bobbed her head slowly, knowing no further words were needed on the subject of the breakup of Rachel’s marriage.

At length, Rachel murmured: “I’m glad I came out here one last time. There was a time I couldn’t wait to leave; relieved you were the older daughter that Dad would look to for running the business. I don’t think I’ve ever truly appreciated how much of a burden you’ve shouldered.”

“We’ve both had our burdens and hardships,” Lisa said, looking at the glowing embers in the fireplace.

“I mean it, Lisa,” Rachel insisted. “Thank you for being there for Dad, and for running Fairfield all these years. It’s just a shame he didn’t live long enough to see the success it’s become.”

“A success that’s now coming to a close,” Lisa said quietly. “When I pick up stakes and move to Avignon, it’s going to be a whole new business.”

“Nothing wrong with that,” Rachel commented. “You haven’t heard from Jack. You said it yourself that it’s time to make a fresh start.”

“I know,” Lisa said. “And you’re right. But being here in Hudson, well, it’s brought back a lot of memories with him. Good memories. It hurts to finally realise that there won’t be any more of those.”

“Well, who knows? Maybe you’ll meet a fine French gentleman in Avignon,” Rachel said with a mirthful chuckle.

“Oh, no! The last thing I need is to turn into Aunt Evelyn,” Lisa scoffed, chagrined at her sister’s comment. Her thoughts suddenly took her to Toulon and the foul experience she had with Alphonse. It struck her his marriage to the young Audrey had come and gone that spring, and their baby was probably due any time. I sure dodged a bullet with that one, she decided, even if my “friends” thought we would make a good match.

“You could never be like Aunt Evelyn,” Rachel said. “You’re not a gold-digger, and the money you’ve made came through hard work. And the money doesn’t really matter to you, either, does it?”

“I won’t lie,” Lisa replied. “The money matters, because I got to do things and go places I always dreamed of doing and seeing when I was a kid. But what’s money if you don’t have people you love to share it with?”

Rachel looked at her sister with sympathy. “You really did love him, didn’t you?”

Lisa returned Rachel’s glance. “With every fiber of my being. My whole world stopped when Lou told me about his heart attack. Nothing mattered after nearly losing him like that. I just wish I had the chance to tell him so.”

“Look, it’s not my place to tell you what to do or what not to do, Lis,” Rachel said. “But you’re here in Hudson now, and he’s here. This could be your last chance to tell him.”

A slight shiver ran down Lisa’s spine at the notion of facing Jack and baring her heart as she had tried so many months ago, when she made the horrible mistake of renting the hospital bed for him. “I already squandered that ‘last chance’, Rach,” Lisa said sadly. “It’ll take a miracle to convince Jack to see me again. I blew it, and now I’m paying the price.”

--

Thanksgiving dishes were washed and put away; night checks on the horses were finished; everyone was tucked away in bed. Jack, however, lingered by himself in the living room before the fire, sipping on a hot toddy. There was indeed much to be thankful for, he knew, particularly when it came to his own life. There’s much to regret, too, he thought, watching as the flames licked at the seasoned logs. While life moved on, his heart still pined for her. He was still stuck in a place of uncertainty and inaction; of wanting to reach out and of pulling back again. It’s been ten months. Lisa has moved on, surely. It would be wrong of me to call her now, after all that’s gone on between us, and mess up whatever it is she has going. I should be thankful we had whatever it is we had and let her go. With that, Jack pulled himself up from the couch, doused the fire, and crept into his bedroom. As he closed his eyes, his last thought before falling asleep was that given his angry parting words with Lisa, spoken in the heat of the moment, he was undeserving of a second chance with her. Nothing will ever bring us back together; that’s a bridge too far.

--

*To my non-Canadian readers: Thanksgiving in Canada is celebrated on the 2nd Monday of October.

TBC

[marvinswriting]

Parties

sorry guys, we needed a bad guy.......blame bear for this one parties never end well og g/t mg (but its not canon to the ‘storyline’ and will never be referenced again lmao)

I hate parties. 

Any size parties.

Just hate em.

There's a reason I spend my Halloweens with Damian watching horror movies rather than going to events. 

The rest of my friends on the other hand love parties. 

Maybe not Aaron, but he can deal. I can't.

Yet here I stand next to a drunk as fuck Regina in the Heron's kitchen. It's not a holiday or anything. Cady just wanted to throw a banger so Cady threw a banger. 

Gretchen was around here somewhere. Aaron was in the living room and Cady was running frantically through the house multitasking taking shots and stopping drunk teenagers from wrecking her house. Damian stayed home with the common sense he's been blessed with. 

I should be with him but Regina convinced me to come. And hey, it's Cady's house. At least I know I won't be dealing with Shane Omen or anything.

"Isn't this fun?!" Regina asks gripping my arm. As always shes wasted an hour in. To be fair, so are most people here. I think Cady was already drunk when we arrived. 

"Yeah, this is tits." I say sarcastically, watching Cady do cheers with a random classmate and down whatever was in that red solo cup. 

I was tipsy too, don't get me wrong. I'm not putting myself through a highschool party totally sober, but I wasn't wasted as fuck like the girl next to me. 

"Huh, where is Gretchen?" Regina calls over the music. 

"How should I know? She's not my giant."

Regina begins texting on her phone, clearly struggling to do so coherently. 

My own phone dings and for a second I think she may have accidentally texted me but its a message from Aaron. 

"Come to the living room." I read out loud. "It's Aaron." I explain once Regina shoots me a confused glance. 

"Well, how the fuck does he expect us to get there?" Regina asks. "Can't just walk!" She's theatrically throwing her hands around and I can't help but laugh. 

Cady walks into the kitchen, leaning against the counter we're at, looking incredibly stressed. "My house is going to be in flames by the end of the night." She mumbles.

"Hey, Cady?" I ask walking over to her. "Think you can take me to Aaron?"

Cady hums in agreement, watching a group of teens push each other around a couple feet away. "Yeah, yeah. Whatever you want Janis. Just- give me a moment."

She walks over to the boys and says something to them, I can't hear what they're saying but they stop roughhousing.

Cady walks back over, a stressed smile on her face. "What did you want?"

"Aaron texted me. I nee-"

"Hold that thought, Janis." Cady holds a finger out before walking away again. 

I sigh, looking back to Regina. "You hear from Gretchen? She might be our best bet."

Not that I trusted a drunk Gretchen. I also promised Damian I'd stick with Cady in hopes to minimalize the risk of being dropped. But I don't see much choice right now. 

"Nope," Regina pops the 'p', wobbling up and stepping over to me. "I like your hair today!" She grabs a strand and twirls it between her finger. "You're so pretty. You know that right?"

Regina has two levels of drunk. A bit tipsy and cliche white girl wasted. There's no in-between and it's abundantly clear where she's at right now.

"Right," Cady walks back over with a sigh. "What did you two want?"

"Oh, if it's not too much because you look kinda busy right now- could you take us to the living room? Aaron wants to talk with us-" My voice trails off as it becomes apparent that Cady isn't listening. She's glancing around the house while simultaneously taking long sips from her red solo cup. "Cady."

"What?" She glances down at us. "Oh, sorry. You were sayi-"

"Cady Heron!" A voice calls from the crowd. 

I groan in frustration as Cady walks away without even saying bye to us. 

Yes, I know its Cady's house party and she needs to watch out for her property, but Jesus is it so hard to pay attention to your friends?

"Still no Gretchen," Regina says. "I tried calling twice."

Cady walks back over with a grin. "Sorry. Sorry." Her phone dings and she pulls it out. "What did you need, Janis."

"For you to pay attention," I say, not bothering to hide the mild annoyance in my voice.

"Yeah, I get it. The same thing happened to me," Cady replies dully before gasping. "Who's posting my parent's bedroom on their private story! Upstairs is off-limits!" She runs back into the crowd.

I groan pulling out my phone to tell Aaron we may be a while.

"She's not paying attention." Regina points out.

"No, really."

It's not long before Cady is once again, making her way back to us. "False alarm." She chuckles. "Now. What did you two need again?"

"Can you take us to A-"

"Put that down! If that breaks you're getting billed!" Cady interrupts me, yelling at some people in the next room.

"Cady!" I yell, throwing my hands out in exasperation. "Pay attention, god damn it!"

"Jesus, Janis. Needy much?" Cady teases. 

"Yeah! I am! I'm fucking small and would like assistance but you keep running off!"

"Yeah!" Regina cheers from behind me. "What's going on?"

Cady scowls. "You try throwing a fucking party, Janis. I have better things to do right now."

"Better things to do than care about the well being of your friends?" 

I know Cady is drunk and probably isn't explaining her emotions the best right now. That or she's being one hundred percent honest because that's what happens when you're wasted. Just look at Regina.

"Yeah, Janis! Believe it or not, my world doesn't revolve around you."

"Actually, Damian put you in charge of Janis. To ignore her would be destroying his trust." Regina says, leaning onto me for support.

Cady shrugs. "And if my house gets wrecked I'm destroying my parent's trust."

"Listen, Cady! This doesn't need to be a fight! I just need help getting to A-"

"Janis I can't put all my attention on you all the time! It's not my fault you're in love with me or som-" Cady cuts herself off.

I already got the gist of it.

Regina gasps from somewhere behind me as I freeze.

"Janis-" Cady reaches forward but I step back. 

"No."

"Janis I'm so sorry I-"

"Don't touch me." I push her hand away and Cady lets it fall to her side. 

"I didn't mean it."

I think back to my 'people are more honest when they're drunk' thought. How come Cady only said these things when wasted? It clearly meant she believed those words to an extent. 

"Janis please-" Cady raises her hand again.

"I said, don't touch me!" 

There are tears in my eyes at this point. Arms wrap around me as Regina hugs me from behind. 

"I want to leave." I whisper. 

Regina nods into my shoulder. "I'll try calling Gretchen again."

I look up at Cady, whos standing there frozen, regret all over her face. "Janis," Her voice is barely audible over the party. 

"Save it." I snap. I'm not going to let the tears fall. Not again. Not over her. I cried over Regina and I said I wouldn't cry over Cady. But I did.

I sure as hell won't do it again.

"Oh thank god you picked up, Gretchen." Regina lets go of me to step away and talk on the phone. 

Gretchen, Regina, and I were all supposed to stay at Cady's for a sleepover. We would help her clean up the house and deal with hangovers together in the morning. But the last thing I want to do right now is stick around Cady. 

Having your sexuality thrown at you as an insult has a strangely sobering effect. Guess you can learn new things even in the worst of times. 

I'm pushing back the need to cry to the point where I'm feeling sick. I mean, puking my guts out would really just be a great way to end the night, huh? Anything other than cry over this. Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me three times, twice with the same girl? Guess that's on me for being a dumbass. 

Gretchen walks into the room. "Hey," She says tentatively. "I'm just here for Regina and Janis."

Cady steps to the side silently. 

Gretchen holds her hand out, waiting for Regina and I to climb on. I'm not thrilled with the idea of a drunk Gretchen carrying me, but at least she won't turn my sexuality into an insult. 

Gretchen pulls us to her chest and turns to Cady. "I don't fully know what went on, but Regina and I probably aren't going to stay the night. If you need help cleaning up tomorrow I'll swing by but I think everyone has had a bit too much tonight and we all need to take a step back." 

Since when was Gretchen the reasonable thinker?

Cady nods, looking everywhere but me.

Regina's arms are back, pulling me into her for a hug. I don't fight it, I'm too occupied trying to keep tears at bay. I text Aaron saying we were leaving and the check up on Cady. Just like last time, even though she went for the lowest blow she could, I still care about her. 

Maybe that's why I keep getting hurt.

Gretchen steps outside. "I'm obviously not driving."

"Yeah," I whisper. There's instantly one person in my mind I know I can call.

But-

I don't want to worry him over something like this. It's my fault I keep getting into these situations. It's on me. It's late, I don't want to have to wake him up.

But he wouldn't want Gretchen to drive, I know that much.

As if she can sense my inner turmoil, Regina's hand runs up and down my arm. "You wouldn't be annoying him, you know."

My phone rings, making both of us jump. Gretchen laughs at the sudden movement in her hand.

It's Damian.

"Wow, you guys really do have soulmate intuition." Regina giggles. 

I elbow her and pick up the phone, trying to sound as normal as possible. "Damian, what's up?"

"I just got off the phone with Cady."

Why did he call Cady? What?

As if he knew my questions, Damian continues. "She called me because she said so,e things and wanted me to make sure you were okay. Do you, Regina, and Gretchen need a ride?"

"You don't need to, it's late you probably want to go to bed and-"

"Janis. I didn't ask what you think I wanted to do. I'm asking if you have somebody sober coming to pick you up?"

There's a long pause. "No." I say quietly.

"I'm on my way." Damian doesn't sound mad or annoyed that he has to come, much to my relief.

I nod, forgetting her can't see me, and lower the phone from my ear.

"Damian's coming." I say to Gretchen as the line clicks dead.

There's a lot of questions in my head. Why did Cady say those things to me at the party, again? Why did Cady call Damian? Why does it hurt more each time? All of my questions go largely unanswered. 

Gretchen sits on Cady's front steps. 

We can still hear the party going on inside, people cheering and music blasting. I feel bad for dragging Regina and Gretchen away from the party. I know it's their scene.

"I thought I was gonna be sick in there," Gretchen admits. "Kinda glad for an excuse to get fresh air. Just wish the excuse wasn't because of-" She glances back inside. 

"Yeah." I say slowly.

Regina has since let go of me and the cold winter air is a lot more apparent. Why throw a party in the winter? A high school party is just an excuse to wear skimpy dresses and minimal clothing. Why not do it in the summer or something. 

I look down at my own dress. Regina insisted I wear one but she couldn't get rid of my fishnets and jacket. You couldn't really tell it was a form-fitting black dress due to my baggy jacket yet I still felt uncomfortable. I tugged at the bottom in a vain attempt to make the dress longer. 

"I hate parties."

Regina giggles from next to me in her pink rubber dress. I don't understand how she could walk around like that. Her dress was even shorter than mine. 

Regina and Gretchen chat while we wait for Damian. I don't contribute to the conversation, I barely even listen. I'm too lost in my thoughts, trying to figure out why Cady would do this to me. 

Again.

It isn't until a familiar car pulls up that I properly tune into the real world. Damian doesn't even wait for Gretchen to walk over, he's already out of his car and making his was over. I cringe at the worried look on his face, knowing it's my fault. He's wearing his denim jacket and its wrapped tightly around him in an attempt to fight the cold air.

"Hey." He says softly. "Mind if it?" He motions to me but directs the question to Gretchen. Gretchen holds out her hand and Damian lifts me up, mindful of Regina.

"I assume you're taking Regina back to your place?" Damian asks Gretchen.

"I think so."

"Let me text my mom to let her know, but yeah." Regina says, pulling out her phone. 

Damian nods, holding me close to his chest and walking to his car. "Janis, do you want to go home or-"

"Can I stay with you?" I ask tentatively. Cady was annoyed with me for asking too much, was everyone else too? I knew I wasn't overstepping boundaries to ask to stay with Damian, but deep down I felt like I was.

"Of course." Damian says warmly. Both him and Gretchen step in the car. It's warmer in here because of the heater. Damian slips me wordlessly into his jacket pocket where I sink down, not even bothering to join in this conversation. Damian taps the pocket before starting the car. He and Grethen talk in hushed voices and I can occasionally make out Regina saying a word or two. 

I think Regina is telling them about what happened but I don't contribute.

"You could see it on her face as soon as she said it that she regretted it."

"Then why did she say it?" Gretchen whispered.

"When she called me," They were all whispering, but Damian's voice was obviously clearer. "She told me about how much she wished she could take it back. I told her that yeah, the first time was fucked up, but Janis still accepted her apology. And that was a big step for Jan. The more she says it, the harder and harder the apology will be to accept."

"Mhmm."

They talk more, but the conversations are about little thing so I don't pay attention much. The car stops and I poke my head out of the pocket to say bye to Regina and Gretchen. They both wave and Damian watches to make sure they get inside before pulling off.

"So," He says. "Talk to me, Jan. I know you don't like to, but please do it for me."

I sink back into the pocket slightly, leaning my head over the lip of the pocket. 

"I feel shitty."

Damian hums knowingly. He waits for me to say more but doesn't push it. Just, a quiet opportunity to add more if I wanted to.

I didn't.

"When I got the call-" Damian sighed, turning onto his road, his voice filling up the silence in the car. I didn't mind, sinking into the pocket but still paying attention. "I didn't know how to feel. I thought it showed a level of matuirty that Cady wanted me to check up on you, but I think an even bigger sign of maturity should be to not do it in the first place. But- it's not about what I think. It's about if you're okay. Which you don't have to be right now, but you can talk to me. You know that."

"Yeah, I do." 

Damian pulls into his driveway and turns off the car. "I love you, Janis." He says, unbuckling himself. "I don't know why this keeps happening to you but no matter what happens I'll be there."

Damian scoops me out of his pocket as he closes the car door behind him. He brings his hand up to his shoulder and I take the hint climbing on. 

We make our way through the Hubbard household and into his room. Damian must be able to tell that I don't want to talk right now, because he talks about a bunch of random things from today's sunset to his new favorite broadway show. I don't contribute to the conversation and he doesn't expect me too. It's just nice to hear his voice and to concentrate on that, instead of the thoughts in my head.

Damian pulls out a small box that I recognize and gently brings me to his desk. He places the box on the table and lets me open it. 

"I'm sure you don't want to go to bed in your party outfit."

It's a small box of all clothes I have left at the Hubbard in the past either intentional or by accident. I pull out a pair of sweatpants and an old band t-shirt, the album cover long faded. 

"I'll be in the bathroom getting ready for bed, holler if you need me." Damian smiles before ducking out of the room.

Even when I hit my lows, my relationship with Damian doesn't change.

Yeah, I wasn't feeling very talkative tonight, can you blame me? Yet Damian didn't mind. He filled the quiet void himself. I smiled to myself as I began changing. Damian was always there when I needed him and he always knew what I needed in order to help. 

I don't deserve him. 

Did he ever get annoyed? Cady clearly did. I mean, I ask Damian for help a lot more often than I ask Cady. I bet it got irritating. He was probably about to get ready for bed before Cady called. And then he had to get up and leave the house because of me.

I'd be a little annoyed. I don't blame him.

God and now I'm making it worse by being here for the night. 

I should have just gone home and dealt with my thoughts like a normal person. Me being here and me being such a mess isn't fair on Damian.

He deserves better.

There's a knock at the door as I finish slipping on my shirt. "I'm done!" I call, making sure my voice travels.

Damian steps into the room and the knot in my stomach tightens because I don't deserve him. And he deserves better. 

I haven't cried about Cady yet. And I won't. I can't. Not again. Besides, it will worry Damian more and that's the last thing I want right now. 

Damian crosses the room, sitting down at his desk. 

"Hey." He says softly.

"Hi." 

Damian's hand comes up to cup around me gently and I allow myself to lean back into the warmth.

"Tell me what's going on in that head of yours, Jan." He prompts gently.

"I feel stupid," I say. "Like maybe I should have seen this coming. Regina changed, why didn't Cady? Why is it that every time she's drunk that's the lowest blow she can think of. It's not even the words that hurt anymore, its the fact that Cady said it. Literally anybody else at that party could have said it and I'd be fine. But Cady said it. And it hurts."

I cut myself off when I feel the tears sting at my eyes again. 

I already feel guilty about asking for help all the time. I already feel like a nuisance- being tiny and all. I didn't need Cady to solidify the thought that I was just an inconvenience to everyone.

"All I did was ask for help." I whisper, looking down.

It's quiet for a while. The silence almost feels too loud. 

"Jan," I look up at Damian who also looks like he is about to cry. "Asking for help is never a bad thing. Ever."

"But, she-"

"No. Janis." Damian's voice is soft but stern. "We don't know what was going through Cady's head but that doesn't make what she said okay. Please promise me you'll ask for help when you need it. Even if you never ask anyone but me, promise me you won't try and do things on your own when you know people are willing to help."

I take a shuddered breath, still trying to hold the tears in. "Okay."

Damian smiles but laced with worry. "C'mere."

His fingers close gently around me as he draws me in. I grip onto his t-shirt, letting myself fall against his chest. "You're so strong, you know that, right?" 

"I'm no-"

"I don't know anyone as brave as you." Damian continues without letting me deny anything. "To go through this so many times and still put a smile on your face? I'm so proud of you."

Damian gets up and walks over to his bed, placing me down on the pillow before walking around his room, turning off all lights.

I can ignore everyone's calls and texts for now, but school is going to be a bitch on Monday. Facing Cady is going to be a bitch on Monday. 

A hand scoops me up at Damian lays down, placing me on his chest. His hand rests over me and I can't help but smile.

Yeah, Cady may see me and nothing more than a liability. Just another annoying thing to watch over, but Damian doesn't. Damian has proved time and time again that he cares and will continue to care.

Yeah, Cady's words hurt. A lot. But she didn't speak for every giant I know. 

"Night, Janis," Damian says softly. "Love you."

"I love you too."

Cady had a lot of explaining to do come Monday. And even then, I'm in no rush to accept her apology. Because no matter what happens, I have Damian. 

I always have.

And I always will. 

lmao i told bear i wanted to write giant damian and tiny janis and im fully aware i could have just written like 500 words of fluff but like- this is so much more fun @realmisspolarbear @musicallygt @sourishlemons @smallsoysauce

[thenovelist101]

Wandered

Chapter Six

To spare time, let’s address the main components to this heist: A rampage of bumbling fifth graders, racial slurs, milk, a bell, soldiers, and a devastatingly euphoric acquirement.

Let’s start with the basics, the actual plan. It was lousy, because when two poor girls who have never broken the law try to create a smart plan, it’ll almost never work.

“Can we please not do this?” Lavender said in a whisper. They were sitting on two barrels near a wooden barn. The two assumed they had a few minutes before they get kicked out. “No, I want to.” “Mirai, I’m dark. I’m going to go to jail.” “I’ll go with you.” “Do you not know how The Punishers work? They pardon these types of things for people like you.” Trust me Lavender, they would never pardon people like me. Mirai thought. She smiled. “It’ll be fun...” “Crazy.” “Look! All you have to do is ask a bunch of questions to the mister and I take some stuff and dash out. Simple.”

Lavender scrunched her nose and thought for a moment. “That is kinda simple.” she admitted. Mirai nodded.

“Don’t you want to fight back? I know your brother got arrested, and you want to do something. This will help!” “In what way? Stealing isn’t going to get my brother out of jail.” “We’ll... order a cell next to him if we get caught?” “You really don’t know how to talk Mirai.” She frowned. Mirai was really bad at empathizing, or talking in a way didn’t personally attack someone.

A woman with a wooden stick came out of the shed. “What the hell are you two doing? Out of here! OUT!” The two jumped off the barrels and scrammed off into the streets again.

Natalie started sobbing into Lavender’s chest. She rubbed her back gently until she calmed down. Natalie was starving. Lavender looked at Mirai. “Fine, get milk. That ONLY.” Mirai made a smile that resembled the one Vincent made when he was sly. “Yes ma’am.”

————————

It started earlier with a boy, that was doing deliveries of newspapers in the morning. He was simply walking around town telling people to buy the paper, and heard the conversation quite distinctly. The he went up to tell his other newsboy friends, who told their sibling as well as their classmates, and those people told everyone else who didn’t know in the school. It spread like wildfire.

What was so interesting about this was no one ever openly said they would steal like that, and it felt like a peaceful protest of an imaginary revolution. The children were obsessed with that idea.

The original boy that heard was a sixth year, and the time he overheard where the two girls were going to steal didn’t match up with his class’s free period.

Now evidently, the fifth years had their free period the exact time afternoon started.

“Alright class, free time begins-“ Before the teacher could say he was finished, everyone shut their books and started putting on their coats to go outside. A specific boy, was most amped about the purge. Finally some people who understood what it was like to live in the world of thievery.

“We need to go. C’mon!” He slapped the back of a boy’s head, the person in question who was sleeping. “What… yeah, yeah, whatever Chris.” Chris had hair that went up in spikes, and a shabby brown coat that looked like it was stolen off from a homeless man’s back. Everyone was already leaving for this unplanned event and Chris didn’t want to be tardy.

“Okay, okay we’re coming.” said another boy with long hair. “C’mon Corny.” Corny was busy on his desk fiddling with the glass on his desk, his mind wandering somewhere else. “I’ll sit this one out. Why would I want to see people steal? It sounds a little messed up.” Corny’s blue eyes eyed Chris. He frowned. “Are you okay?” The boy with long hair asked Corny. He placed a hand on his shoulder. “Yeah, I just want to stay here. Go and tell me anything special when you come back.” He said. Chris frowned. “Fine, your loss.” The three left.

The children were all scattered about near the store the newsboy overheard the two girls talked about. At first glance it may have looked normal, but once you start thinking outside the box you realize there’s kids behind crate boxes, girls pretending to talk to each to each other near the horse stalls, and children pretending to read newspapers near the benches next to the store. Chris was right near the front of the store, the two behind him looking bored. “Everyone’s waiting. Do you know where they are?” “Yes, and slap Shane awake.” The long haired boy nudged the sleeping boy. “What… did they take anything yet?” “No! Look!”

A dark skinned and light skinned girl came into the scene, one looking more different than the other. The dark haired one had a baby in her arms. “Alright, I may need to judge your viewings. How do you know?” The long haired boy asked. “Well first off it’s a duo. Duo’s are good. Second off you see the white girl nudging that other girl’s arm… ah now she’s going inside. We’re about to witness the stall.” Chris looked curiously like everyone else.

“Excuse me?” Lavender asked. “What is it?” A man, that didn’t look friendly,looked at her with pissed eyes. “Where is the nearest way to the bathroom?” “...what?” “Why?” “Cause, um, you smell bad.” Some kids tried to hold in their guffaws.

“What?!” “Y-yeah, I-I mean no! I didn’t mean that, sorry.” The children started to burst out laughing. The girl asked more and more questions as the man got more infuriated.

Lavender began to realize how much a lamb to the slaughter she was, but her voice kept raising on like the mans.

Chris frowned. “I feel this is redundant.” The long haired boy said. “Well, it is funny.” Shane said wiping his eyes. “No, that other girl should’ve done the job of stalking.” “Why?” The long haired boy asked. Chris turned to look at him. “Blacks have no personal space.”

Then, when the man was fed up he started cursing a bunch of racial slurs at her, which made everyone quiet. “WHY IN THE NAME OF A WHORE DID THEY THINK TO REPRODUCE BARAARIC ANIMALS.”

Even the people who came in and out quickly shuffled by, not wanting to get caught in the kerfuffle. The air was stiff, and everything smelled of salt and soot. Lavender said nothing but clenched onto Natalie. “We should go…” Shane said. “No.” Chris stated. Then, the man struck Lavender on the face, which stumbled her and the baby onto the floor.

———————————

Mirai went in casually, standing up high, hands behind her back. She’s been there before, and knew who worked there. The man outside, a butcher in the back who also tends the stocks, a woman who checks out the money.

She went to the back, where the glasses of milk were stored. This is so easy. Mirai thought. She put it under her white dress, and could feel the numbness in her skin when the cold pressed onto it.

She turned around to exit when a soldier came in, his mustache white with rosy cheeks. Mirai’s eyes widened and turned the other way and hid behind a shelf of flour.

Her heart pacened, hoping the soldier didn’t see her. She wasn’t exactly all goody goody with the government.

After a few seconds she stood up and hit her head on the shelf over head. She didn’t yell in agony, but a bag of flour fell down on her head. It made a hard thud on her head. He head was throbbing with pain. Dust was everywhere. As she inhaled the fumes it dried in her throat. Flour was drenched in her throat and caused her to choke cough. The odds were never in her favor.

She could feel the step of the soldier’s boots tapping onto the floor. “Hey, who’s there?” He called. In a state of panic, she swooped down and went through the door only employees were allowed in.

Mirai shut it behind her and caught her breath against the door. She took the milk out of her dress and carried it with one arm. She looked around. She had to be careful.

There was an open doorway on the side that led to where people ordered meat, and she really didn’t want to be cooked along with them.

On one side was stocked produce, and on the other dead animals that were stripped from their skins were in stings, some looking clean, some looking bloody. It smelled of metal and glass.

Mirai grimaced and refrained from looking to the dead side. She looked to the shelves of stocked food and saw jars of raspberry jam. She smiled. Lavender likes those.

They were on the top shelf, and she pushed herself up a little, feeling at ease once the air settled in with her. She grabbed the most nicest looking one and smiled to herself. Everything was going more or less perfectly. Everything was fine. Until the ringing of a bell.

The Butcher rang his order bell to signal his next customer. “Your pork’s skinned.” He said. “Oh thank you, quite the show going on with the black girl. I swear children get stupider and stupider each day. I heard her brother got arrested a week ago.” “Well you don’t say.”

Mirai froze. No longer holding onto the edge of the shelf, she was in midair. Her hands shook violently, not knowing what to do. That bell meant it was time to get hurt, time to get locked in the closet, time to cut herself. She didn’t know what to do, she felt paralyzed in the moment. All those times Vincent wasn’t home…

When she was on the floor, and was caught in her trance of what to do. The marmalade jar slipped onto the floor. The glass shattered and it’s contents splattered about onto the floor. The ringing of the bell faded with the clashing of the jar. Mirai’s heart almost stopped. “Who’s there?!” The Butcher yelled walking to the doorway. Mirai looked to the door and tried to go out, but it was locked. How?!

The Butcher walked in and saw the jar on the floor, shattered in pieces. He cursed under his breath, and started picking up the mess. While he was cleaning he felt a shift in the air. He thought it was the glass shaking, but he stopped and listened for a few seconds.

It was like a simple movement made inaudible.

The silence was then broken. “Excuse me, I need to pay!” The woman called from the doorway. “Yeah, yeah I’m coming.” He said walking out the doorway with some broken pieces of glass.

Up on the ceiling, Mirai laid her back onto the wooden board, her hair in tangles and face red.

Mirai was wonderstruck that he didn’t hear her heavy breathing, or anything at all. She was stuck on the ceiling, holding onto the milk for dear life. Only one thing struck across her mind from the Butcher’s conversation. Lavender!

Using her magic she banged the door open and ran out with the milk jar—and a new jar of marmalade— in her hand. “Hey!” The Butcher yelled, the soldier ran after her.

Oh no, no, no. This soldier and Butcher chased her through the store. She tipped over a chair that caused the Butcher to trip on.

—————————-

Let’s resume to what happened with Lavender. “This isn’t right…” Shane said. “Idiotic, just pure idiocy.” Chris muttered. “Chris, that’s not very nice...Chris, Chris!” The long haired boy tried to grab him but he leisurely walked in between the man and Lavender.

Chris shoved him to the ground and whirled around to help Lavender get up. He grabbed the baby first. The child had a small gash on her cheek. When he adjust her into his arm Chris used his free hand to help her up. “You’re real bad at stalling.” “Yeah no hell about it.” She muttered, taking his hand.

Once she steadied herself the man started screaming. “Get out of the way boy.” He spat. “No, the king of thieves code states that if one partner goes down the other one has too.”

Lavender looked at him like he had three heads, while he also had her sister. “You’ve got some nerve to be standing with a black girl.” The man spat. “I frankly don’t care.” “What the hell are they teaching you in school now?! That everything is peaches and cream when it comes to equality.”

Now all the kids were filled with some sort of feeling inside them.

“Well, they’re teaching us to stay away from weirdos like you.” The boy got slapped in the face. Chris stuck up his middle finger in response. Shane sniggered. “That’s our Chris Brown.” “Yeah…”

Before anything else was about to go down the front door slammed open and a white girl covered in flour grabbed Lavender's arm. “We kinda need to leave!” Mirai said.

Lavender was about to run but the man yanked her arm. It hurt like hell. She was the rope in a tug of war.

“EVERYONE ATTACK!” called a boy. Suddenly the children started coming in like some sort of flash mob and unleashed themselves to the man.

Chris took a step back from it and held the baby—who was crying, in his hands. Mirai started to laugh on the spot because how weirdly times it was. Lavender tapped on his shoulder hastily. “Hey, my sister.” “Oh right.” He gave Natalie to her. “Next time, let your white friend do the talking. No point in bringing a bad name to the skin. Don’t show weakness. Plan your questions too.”

Lavender rolled her eyes. “I didn’t ask for a lecture on stealing, but alright.” Chris smiled. “Yeah.” “My name’s Lavender.” “Chris.” “...last name?” “I like it when people call me by my first name.” “Oh, alright.” She said. “One more thing, run like hell.” Before Lavender could respond Mirai grabbed her arm and started sprinting out. “WILL DO!” Mirai yelled back in response.

The soldier was behind them, and she could hear more soldiers following after them. “Who’s that boy?” “I don’t know Mirai, just remind me to kill you.” “STOP THERE!” Someone yelled.

The two girls jumped over a wheelbarrow and ran past a carriage. The horse neighed and went berserk in response.

Natalie was bobbing her head up and down. “Well you’re going to have to wait in line.” Mirai said. They took a right and stopped at a dead end.

Mirai felt as if she were to snap. There was a wall. A dead end. “Where are they?” someone called. “I think they went this way.” “Nice knowing you, Mirai.” Lavender said. “No.” Mirai’s adrenaline was pumping through, her keen and stubbornness wasn’t going to end yet.

She squeezed her arm and felt something churn inside her stomach. She could no longer hear anything. It felt like she was in the middle of emptiness, but there was something there. There was noise. Horses. No, their hooves.

Mirai opened her eyes saw herself at the horse’s stable. Lavender was sitting on a pile of hay with Natalie sleeping on her arms, staying motionless.

The jars felt weak in her arms. “That was a nice… fever dream.” Mirai said before dropping to her knees abruptly.

“Mirai!” Lavender bent down and knelt next to her. She nudged her arm. “Mirai, get up.”

Mirai listened and sat up on the floor. “I feel awfully flushed.” She said. “ No doubt about it. I don’t know how we got here. It’s a miracle gifted by God.” Lavender mumbled.

Mirai blinked a few times. “Yeah… oh no.” She stood up. “No, no, this is bad.” She put her hands on her head. She did this. Mirai started pacing up and down the hallway, the horses watched.

“Well I don’t know what you’re doing but we got milk, is THIS what you screwed us up on?!” Lav held up the jam jar. Mirai nodded.

“Obviously.” “Calm down also, I don’t know how we got here, it’s really creepy and weird, but we’re here.” “It’s because of me.” Mirai whispered. Lavender looked at her. “What?” “I did this.” Lavender laughed. “Okay Sherlock. Hey did you know I make the weather happen as well?”

Natalie chugged down the milk like no tomorrow.

Mirai felt exhausted. For once, she felt her magic being drained. And she hardly used it. “Lav, I actually did that. I’m not joking.” Lavender scrunched her nose. “Okay then…”

Our of frustration she went by the doorway. “Watch.” She said. The door stalls for the horses swung open, each one making a cracking thud sound as it hit the pole. Then she slammed all of them closed again, all without even touching the wood.

Lavender froze, staring at Mirai and then at the horses that were going crazy through the witchcraft.

“I was going to say it’s just the wind but….” Lav’s voice trailed off.

Mirai back was slumped and she sat down on the hay. “I don’t think anyone’s here, so this is it.”

She explained everything excluding the beatings, she didn’t want anyone to know about the injuries. They were an embarrassment. “Well, it makes sense”. “What?!” “Yeah. You’re so thick headed. For one don’t pretend I don’t notice the Guards watching us, specifically you for a long while. Also you’re very timid doing certain things like you’re going to piss your pants or something.”

Mirai scratched her head. “I guess…” “I’m glad you told me. Our breaking the law was a success, thank the lord.” “Haha, yeah…”

Mirai smiled. It felt good to tell someone else why she wasn’t normal. She wanted to be normal, because then she could be pretty and maybe her parents would like her. Then she and Vincent could act like normal siblings who fight all the time. However, that wasn’t her life.

Something told Mirai to go home. It was probably because of Vincent. “I should go. See you later.” Mirai said weakly.

She turned around and started to walk out before Lavender said, “Teleportation.” Mirai quirked a brow. “What?”

“Teleportation. That’s the power you attained.” Mirai smiled. “I guess.”

Although this power was something that made Mirai very uneasy, life was actually starting to go her way (a little) for once, and she liked it. Mirai savored the feeling the best she could, though all she wanted to do was sleep.

Vincent ran home and slammed opened the door, the letter crumpled in his hand.

Mirai put on a smile and walked for the next twenty minutes from home. She was starving, tired, and restless.

She passed a poor old homeless woman and waved, she waved back. She took a left through a curved bridge and saw their big, bold, and grand house. She fumbled with door before opening.

This girl could hear her mother laughing her ugly terrible laugh. She could smell her father’s smoke from his cigars.

She walked into the foyer and saw Vincent, and her face lit up. Then she saw her parents in front of him sitting on the dining table, and her head sank.

“I can’t believe it Rowan! You actually did it-“ “Wait to go son! That’ll show those lords how smart and ambitious my son is.” “What’s going on…” Mirai said softly.

“You’ll have to pack now! Six months is a long time.”

Mirai’s heart raced. Six months?! What? “What’s going on?!” She yelled. Everyone turned to her. She saw Vincent’s enigmatic smile and the cold stares of her parents.

“Where’s Vincent going?” “That‘s Merger to you.” The servant spat behind her. The servant started working assigned from the government, she helped with Mirai’s chores but mainly she made sure. Mirai didn’t do anything magical all day.

“He’s leaving next week to Collins!” Father cried happily. Mirai’s has dropped. “Collins!? But that’s-“ “Six thousand nine hundred and eighty miles from here!” Mother said gleefully. The two laughed while Vincent told them to stop.

Mirai’s heart dropped to her stomach. She felt like she was going to throw up. She stared up at him straight in the eye, her eyes already watering. “Mirai…” he started to say.

Vincent then realized why this wasn’t going to work.

[logantheanimal]

Ignore Them

***TRIGGER WARNING - this is an excerpt from a book I am writing about abuse and bullying. It details an incident that went on right under the teacher’s nose. If that subject matter is difficult to read, please skip it. Take care of yourself.***

October 1990 - CD Landolt Elementary, Friendswood, TX

Texas had always been home. My dad was born and raised in SE Texas. My great-grandfather, a pacifist and a member of the Gideons, had served his time during WWII as a conscientious objector on religious moral grounds as a mechanic in the Army Air Corps. He came home to Port Arthur and built a house on Stanley Avenue that stands to this day. If we were in limbo while dad was deployed, we stayed in Port Arthur with GaGa and Da. It made perfect sense that we went home, too - to a Houston suburb.

Being in a big city was a big change. There were a lot more schools, the classes were twice as large, and it was very easy to hide your misadventures from the teacher. As everywhere else, I very quickly became a target. I wasn’t girly, I had short poofy hair, I was socially awkward, I was smarter than everyone else...and since I had always been a target at home, I never learned the social graces required to fit in anywhere. It was easy to make me a target. I was different.

In Mrs. Keith’s English class, it was especially bad. She was so busy trying to cater to her favorites that anything she should have noticed never was. The bullying could happen right under her nose. It always started small: pen caps, spitballs, chewed gum thrown my way. One such incident ended with me being accused of chewing gum in class, which was a huge no-no. I’d usually end up telling the boys doing it to leave me alone and get in trouble. One day, I took my father’s long-standing advice. He said the same thing to me every day for as long as I could remember: IGNORE THEM.

Remember how I said that teachers are like parents? They don’t want justice, they want quiet?

I finally gave Mrs. Keith what she wanted. The boys found it even funnier that I was ignoring them. It took all of my willpower to give them no discernible reaction, but it had the exact opposite effect of what my dad had promised. “They’re trying t get a reaction,” he’d say. “If you ignore them, they’ll leave you alone.”

That made it worse. I was so focused on ignoring them that I never noticed a sign being taped to my back. I didn’t hear someone fiddling with my book bag. I had no idea something was amiss until class change. People, both boys and girls, started shoving me from behind. I kept trying to ignore them. They kept shoving me and I kept walking. Finally, a boy nearly twice my size, Jared, shoved me so hard I flew face-first into my desk in Mr. Whitely’s science class. He kicked me while I was down. Mr. Whitely wasn’t in the room; the rest of the class laughed at me. The pen caps and spitballs started up again. I kept ignoring them.

Later, in PE, a boy named Shane waited for his opportunity and took it as soon as the coaches were busy. He grabbed me by my shirt and punched me for a few minutes while everyone laughed and cheered him on. Once the coaches finally noticed the disturbance (it sure did take ‘em log enough), Shane gave an Oscar-worthy performance. He claimed that I’d started it and he was defending himself.

I have since wanted many times to ask my father if he ever ignored the classmate who picked on him, and how it worked out. I seriously doubt it went so well. Why the hell would he say that bullshit to me?

——

Yes, we really did call my great-grandmother GaGa. We now joke that she was the original Lady Gaga.

[anerdysouthernbelle]

Dakota|Perfume|Kai

This is my first (well, second time actually but first time recently) using a female Superstar as my main character! I’m gonna use another male superstar (you may ship the two or not but I’m just putting them together as well as a second female Superstar for this! Hope y’all enjoy this one!

Dakota Kai x Shane Thorne x Vanessa Borne (I picked her because, on TV, they already don’t like each other so why not?)

https://open.spotify.com/track/0DOgMeHlNponAEqczZoxX0

Tag list: (please let me know if you want to be added or removed!):

@lavitabella87 @wrasslin-x @wrasslesmut @wrestlewriting @wrestlingfae@bruiserw8 @thedeboniardevistation @nahmooste @shieldgirl95@ghostofviper   @breakfastwiththesun @spine-buster @tvrnbvckle @caramara3 @lclb13 @korrasborra @wrasslin-rollins @kakakatey @empress-with-the-crown @anglophilestymie @neversatisfiedgirl @never-shuts-up@chickenwingsuplex @theworldiscolorful @nopeitsnat @wwesmutdonedirtcheap  @sunflowers-and-swear-words @rabidwrestlingfan@indywrestlinglover-life @alafairftw @vivalavonvon @verysharpteeth@themurdererwriter @sonjashuterbugjohnson @kaleywwefan @kinghelmsley@urieshood @vexingfelon @littlebluespoon @crossfit-princess-sethie-boo @trans-am-catie @sjwrites22 @devittslegos @xfirespritex @breadclubrising

Word Count:  1128

Warnings: Angst, jealousy

“I'll never tell, tell on myself but I hope she smells my perfume” 

Shane was off with Vanessa again, leaving Dakota alone yet again. He always apologized for it and always bought her pretty things to make up for it, but she was growing tired of it. She was his girlfriend, dammit - or near enough, anyways. They had been together for a while and he kept telling her that Vanessa was just a friend, that she knew that he and Dakota were a thing.

Dakota didn’t feel that way at times, though. She would always catch Shane looking at her and then to Vanessa during their breaks and sometimes, she caught him in gorilla looking out at Vanessa during her matches. She always told herself that she was being insecure and jealous and that she should stop but she couldn’t help herself. Shane always told her that it was okay and that Dakota was the only one he really had any feelings for, given their history.

She felt like she was going crazy thinking about the two of them together. She knew she shouldn’t and that Shane was hers but that doubt in the back of her mind was always there, always making her feel insecure.

One night at a house show, Dakota was backstage constantly checking her phone for a text or call from Shane, something to tell her he was at least thinking about her and not Vanessa. She kept checking it and checking it, not even watching where she was going until she bumped into her friend, Dijak.

“Whoa, Kiwi. Watch where you’re going,” he said as he laughed and braced her to keep from falling.

“What’s going on?” he asked with concern on his face. Dakota looked up at him - it was hard not to, the guy was 6’7” - and she replied,

“I’m just distracted, s’pose.”

“Yea? What, you ran out of Pokeballs or something?” he joked, indicating the phone she was tightly clutching as if it were a lifeline. She looked down at it and gave a small, short laugh.

“Oh, uh. No. Waiting for Shane to text me back or something. Been waiting a while, actually,” Dakota said sadly as she stole yet another glance at her still blank phone.

Dijak rubbed the back of his neck as he tried to find the words to help his friend.

“I don’t know what to tell you,” he said honestly. “All I know is that he will when he can. I know that’s guy speak for “he’s not that into you” but that’s a lie. Shane loves you. I know he does. He’ll call.”

Dakota gave Dijak a weak smile as she nodded.

“Thank you,” she told him. He leaned down to hug her.

“It’s no problem at all. I gotta go but just keep that in mind, okay?”

Dakota returned the hug as she replied,

“I’ll try.” Dijak released the hug and then walked off, leaving her to stare at her phone until finally, it rang. She unlocked it quickly and answered it, hoping for Shane but only getting her best friend, Nixon instead.

“You were expecting Shane, weren’t you?” Nixon asked.

“What? Noooo,” Dakota tried to deny.

“You were. I can hear it in your voice, bab. You okay?”

“I… am not. I’ve been waiting for him to call or text me or something. I feel like he’s with Vanessa again.” Dakota chewed on her thumbnail as she talked to Nixon.

“Kota-bear, you can’t keep doing this to yourself. You gotta talk to him. Like, actually go talk to him in person, find out exactly what’s going on. It’ll help you,” Nixon told her.

“I know, and I would love to but I can’t get ahold of him at all.”

“Not what I meant. Go to him.”

“Oh. Yea, that’ll probably work.” Dakota heard Nixon laugh on the other end and it made her smile a little more.

“Go get your man, bab. And if not, well, plenty of fish in the sea,” Nixon said.

“You’re right. I’ll go see him tonight when I get home from this show.” Dakota bid her bye and hung up the phone as she came up with a plan for him.

So, that night, she went home to her apartment, showered, changed clothes and grabbed her favorite perfume, Britney Spears’s Fantasy (shut up, it smells great okay?), and left for Shane’s apartment. The drive there was short but felt like it took forever. Finally, she got to his place and let herself in with the key he had given her a few months ago.

“Shane?” she called out. There was no answer and she bit her lip in disappointment. She stood there contemplating her plan until she exhaled sharply and confidently walked to his bedroom. She pushed open the door to see if he was home yet but he wasn’t. She sighed.

“Oh, Shane. Where are you? Are you with her?” Dakota wondered aloud. She took the bottle of perfume out of her bag and held it up, staring at the pretty pink bottle for awhile.

  Finally, she took the cap off the bottle and went around the room, spraying it everywhere she could - his bed, his closet, his dresser. She even went through the rest of the rooms of the small apartment spraying it until the entire apartment was filled with the scent of Fantasy. Then, she took a piece of paper from a notebook he had on his desk and wrote “You and me, babe. Always. Love, Dakota” and taped it to his mirror. If Vanessa came over tonight, she’d smell Dakota instead.

Dakota left after a while, but not before breaking the bottle open and pouring it on Shane’s couch and bed. As she drove back to her apartment, she glanced down at her phone again, hoping for a call or text. She chewed on her bottom lip as she thought about what she had just done. Was it crazy? Yes. Was it clingy? Little bit, yeah. Should she have done it? Probably not because he was just a guy, but he was her guy. She was his girl and no one could come between them but she couldn’t help but feel like there was.

She desperately wanted everything to be in her head, that she was just driving herself insane with her insecurity. She also wondered if Vanessa felt the same way about her, that she was  jealous of the relationship she had with Shane. So, instead of letting the thoughts consume her again, Dakota turned the radio up and drove home. If he called, he called. If not, that was okay. Either way, Vanessa would know that Shane’s apartment was her territory and Shane would know that Dakota would do whatever it took to keep him, even if the methods were a little crazy.

[bamby0304]

Victoria Grimes I: Found

Summary: Victoria was alone. Her dad was dead and she had been separated from her mum, brother and dad’s best friend for awhile now. She was left to fend for herself, trying to survive.But when she hears the blaring alarm of a car coming down the high way, she’ll ever believe what’s install for her. And she never expected to get close to the red-neck hunter.

Chapter Five: When Hell Comes Knocking

Masterlist

Warnings: Violence & death...

Bamby

"Mum I'm going for a walk," I called as I headed for the treeline.

Before I could take another step a hand grabbed on to my arm and turned me around. I was too stunned to say anything... until I saw that it was Shane that had stopped me.

"No."

"What?" I asked, glaring at him.

"You're not going anywhere."

Mum came towards us, Carl close behind. "I don't want you going anywhere by yourself," she told me.

"Please?" Carl asked.

That's when it clicked. Those were the last words I had said to them before we got separated last time. I understood why they wanted me to stay by camp now. They were scared.

"Lori?" We turned to see Carol and her little girl standing by. Carol had a split lips, her arms shaking. "Can you watch Sophia? I need to take care of Ed."

"Vickie can do it," Carl suggested. "I'll help to."

"Victoria, my daughter, can look after them. I'm still doing the laundry," mum offered.

Carol just nodded before walking off.

Carl grabbed my hand and led me towards Sophia. She was a shy girl, with mousy blonde hair. She was cute actually.

I crouched down in front of her, smiling sweetly. "What would you like to do?" I asked her.

"Can we play hide and seek?" Carl asked.

I turned to him and rolled my eyes. "Really?"

Sophia smiled. "Yeah, can we?"

I pretended to think for a moment before grinning and closing my eyes. "One, two, three..."

They both giggled before scurrying off.

"I don't have a sister." Sophia looked up at me while I brushed her hair.

Carl had gotten bored and decided to play with the other little boy. So I had asked Sophia if she'd like me to braid her hair... of course she agreed.

"Neither do I," I told her, grabbing some hair and starting to braid it. "Can you keep a secret though?" She nodded eagerly. "I've always wanted one," I whispered.

She smiled up at me. "Me, too," she whispered back.

"Well do you wanna be my sister? I could be yours," I offered, wrapping a hair-tie around the small braid I made.

"Really?"

I grabbed some more hair, this time a smaller amount. "Mm-hm."

"Can I call you Vickie?"

"Sure." I laughed, surprised that's what would make the deal.

She smiled and turned around, wrapping her arms around my neck, hugging me. "Vickie," she whispered happily.

Behind us there was some commotion about fish. Sophia didn't seem interested though, instead she looked at them like they were the plague.

"Gross," she told me.

Even though I didn't actually mind fish, I still agreed just to make her happy. "Yeah, ew. They're all slimy and gross." I shivered for extra measure.

She giggled. "But they taste good."

I nodded in agreement, smiling back.

"I, uh..." Dale walked up to the group, looking concerned. "I don't want to alarm anyone. We may have a bit of a problem." he said before turning to look up the hill.

We all followed his gaze to see Jim up the top, digging.

Shane lead us towards Jim, Sophia by my side holding my hand. When we got to the top, everyone crowded together behind Shane, watching Jim dig. Carol came to stand by Sophia and I, while Shane talked to Jim.

"Hey, Jim." He waited for a response, but none came. "Why don't you hold up, alright. Just give us a second here. Please."

Jim stopped, turning to Shane. "What do you want?"

"I'm a little concerned man, that's all," Shane answered.

A man- I didn't know his name- added, "Dale says you've been out here for hours."

"So?"

"So why you digging?" Shane asked. "What, you heading to China, Jim? What?" Shane scoffed.

"It doesn't matter, I'm not hurtin' anyone," Jim said before he started digging again.

"Yeah, except maybe yourself. It's a- it's a hundred degrees today," Dale noted. "You can't keep this up.

Without stopping, Jim spoke up, "Sure I can, watch me."

Mum walked forward, arms crossed. "Jim they're not going to say it so I will. You're scaring people. You're scaring my son, and Carol's daughter."

Sophia shifted closer to me, and I wrapped an arm around her. On the other side of her I could see Carol holding Sophia's hand while her arm is around my brother.

He stopped again. "They got nothin' to be scared of. I mean what the hell people? I'm out here by myself self, why don't you all just go and leave me the hell alone?" he asked. Everyone shared a few looks at each other while he went back to digging.

"We think that you need to take a break," Shane said, taking a few steps towards Jim. "Why don't you get yourself some shade. Some food. And maybe, I tell you what, maybe in a little bit, I'll come out here. I'll help you myself. Jim? Just tell me what it's about. Why don't you just go ahead and give me that shovel?"

Jim stopped, but this time he looked different- annoyed I guess. "Or what?"

"There is no or what," Shane told him, shaking his head. "I'm asking you. I'm coming to you and I'm asking you, please. I don't want to have to take it from ya."

"And if I don't?" Jim shrugged. "Then what? Then you goin' to belt my face in like Ed Peletier, aren't you?" He turned to the rest of us. "Ya'll seen his face, huh? Whats left of it. See now that's what happens when someone crosses you."

"That was different, Jim." I didn't even have to look at Shane's face to know he was pissed. The way his back stayed tense, his jaw clenching. I stood to the side and that's all I needed to see, to know how he felt.

"You weren't there," Amy commented. "Ed was out of control, he was hurting his wife."

"That is their marriage. That is not his," Jim yelled, pointing at Shane.

Carol pulled Sophia in her arms, turning her daughters head so she wouldn't have to watch, and covering her ears so she wouldn't have to listen. I rubbed Sophia's back soothingly, so she knew I was there for her.

"He is not judge and jury." Jim continued, "Who voted you boss, huh?"

"Jim I'm not here to argue with you, okay? Now just give me the shovel." Shane reached for the shovel.

Suddenly Jim swung the shovel at Shane, aiming to hurt him. Shane ducked before knocking Jim to the ground and restraining him.

"Victoria, take the kids." mum said.

I grabbed Sophia and Carl's and before leading them back to camp. "Come on guys. We'll go play hey?" I smiled, hoping it would relax them a little. But all I got were a couple of nods and mumbled yeses.

"Vickie what is that?" Carl laughed, pointing at my picture.

"What do you mean 'What is it'? It's obviously a cat," I told him when he just shook his head and smiled I turned to Sophia. "What do you think it looks like?"

She shrugged, giggling. "I don't know."

I rolled my eyes and looked at her picture. "What's your's?"

"You, me and Carl sitting in a park." She smiled. "See? You're wearing a blue dress, and I'm wearing a purple dress." She pointed at the picture.

I nodded. "It's nice." I smiled. "I like it."

She smiled back before her mum came along. "Come on Sophia. Your dad wants to see you." She looked scared and sorry.

I didn't want to let Sophia go. I had spent most of the day with her and I sure as hell didn't want him laying a hand on her. But it was her mum, and I couldn't stop her from taking her. So I just nodded and smiled when Sophia turned to me.

"We'll see you later."

She nodded, no longer smiling, and stood up. Before she walked off, he wrapped her arms around me in a hug, then followed her mum.

I watched her leave. It worried me, but I couldn't do anything about it. So instead I turned around to Carl. "So what did you draw?"

"Good fish?" I asked Sophia.

We all sat around the fire, eating dinner. Sophia sat next to me, leaning against me. She nodded enthusiastically, mouth full of dinner. I couldn't help but laugh at the sight.

I went back to eating, as everyone talked about Dale's watch. I listened, not really understanding what the bug deal was about him looking at his watch, seeing as I was new to the group. Dale went on, quoting some man as we listened thoughtfully.

When he was done we all sat in silence.

It was Amy who spoke first, "You are so weird." I laughed at that, Sophia joining.

After a while Amy stood up. "Where are you going?" Andrea asked her.

"I have to pee," Amy answered. "Jeez, try to be discreet around here."

We all chuckled as she walked off.

The group fell into light chatter, but I was too concerned to listen. The others should have been back by now. There was no more fish for them, so they would have nothing o eat. And it was getting late, so we'd all be in bed by the time they got back.

Stress less. I told myself. If no one else is worried, you shouldn't be either.

I stood up to stretch my legs. When Sophia looked up at me I smiled. "Just need to move. My leg was getting tingly." she smiled back as I started to walk around.

The RV door opened as Amy came out. "We're out of toilet paper?" she called to the group. Suddenly she let out an ear piercing scream.

We all turned towards Amy to see a walker ripping into her arm. That's when everything became a blur as everyone started to panic. Walkers came from everywhere.

"Mum. Mum!" Carl cried.

"Carl." Mum grabbed as she got up and followed everyone else.

I was a little bit away from the group, and before I could move, walkers got in my way. "Shane. Mum!" I cried as they headed for me. I had nowhere to go but turn and run further away.

Lucky for me there was a pick up truck behind me. I jumped on to the back of it, and then crawled on to the roof, out of reach and safe. If I had, had a weapon I would have helped everyone else, but there had been nothing around to grab and I had been too far away.

"Vickie." I heard Shane yell.

"Victoria!" mum screamed,

I cried, watching as people were pulled down. "Shane get them to the RV," I yelled, hoping he could hear me.

"Follow me," he told everyone. "Get in the RV."

Suddenly dad and the others came out of the bushes, guns blaring. People were screaming everywhere. It was chaos.

They were close to the pick up truck, and Daryl caught sight of me right away. "Stay there," he told me before smashing the butt of his gun into a walkers head. He came up to the pick up and jumped into the back, standing there and shooting the walkers that came by.

Once the last of the walkers were dead all you could hear was everyone crying.

"Victoria! Carl! Baby!" dad cried.

Carl run up to him. "Dad!" he cried, throwing his arms around dad.

I jumped off the roof of the car and wrapped my arms around Daryl, sobbing into his shoulder. I hadn't planned on doing that, but it was like I couldn't stop myself. I was just so scared.

"Hey, it's okay." He sounded unsure, like he didn't know what to do. Turning around he placed a hand on my head as I continued to sob. "It's okay. You're safe." I nodded, my arms around his neck pulling him closer. But the tears wouldn't stop.

"Victoria?" Dad called, looking around.

I let go of Daryl and jumped of the pick up, running to my family. "Dad!"

"Oh God," mum sighed with relief as she pulled me in. "You're okay baby. You're alright," she cried.

Dad let Carl down. It was like we knew there was something he was looking at. Mum turned around, and over her shoulder I could see Andrea leaning over Amy's lifeless body.

I fell to my knees, mum following, pulling me into her arms as she sat there too shocked to cry. But the tears I had only just stopped, began to flow once more.

"I remember my dream now. Why I dug the holes," Jim said.

I looked around as, at all the dead bodies, both human and walker, that surrounded us.

Bamby

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Victoria Grimes:

@deanervs @clementine-thx @aliceyourelatefortea

[comic-watch]

Bruce Wayne and Terry McGinnis disagree over Matt McGinnis’ future as Robin – Matt wants to prove himself, but Terry firmly believes he isn’t ready. Meanwhile, Commissioner Barbara Gordon finds herself in the center of a hostage crisis when one of the Jokerz goes from being a run-of-the-mill trouble-maker to someone far deadlier!

Batman Beyond #20 – Target: Batman Part One Writer: Dan Jurgens Penciller: Marco Castiello Inker: Mark Morales Letterer: Travis Lanham Colorist: Wil Quintana Cover: Viktor Kalvachev Variant Cover: Shane Davis & Wil Quintana Group Editor: Marie Javins Editor: Rob Levin

What You Need to Know:  Matt McGinnis, Terry’s little brother, put on a Robin suit to save Terry from a new Payback, who blamed Terry for the death of his son, the first Payback. Dana Tan didn’t approve of Bruce’s using Matt in this way and wants Terry to quit being Batman. Melanie Walker, formerly Ten of the Royal Flush Gang, has returned to Terry’s life and is trying to prove that she’s turned over a new leaf by trying to aid Batman in his battles. Unbeknownst to her, Batman and Terry are the same person.

What You’ll Find Out: Jack Ryder is still giving the news in Neo-Gotham, with a co-host named Adalyn Stern. They start by talking about the arrest of Tommy Falcone, but the story is quickly derailed by some important breaking news. There’s an active shooter in progress at the GCPD headquarters.

Commissioner Barbara Gordon is on the scene, trying to get Scab to drop his weapon, otherwise, she’ll be forced to shoot him. Scab, one of the Jokerz who dresses as though he’s a distaff counterpart to Harley Quinn, has a hostage and is talking about how Batman is everywhere. Barbara wonders what he has to do with this – Batman isn’t even there.

At Stately Wayne Manor, Terry and Bruce discuss the fact that Terry thinks its a mistake to let Matt become Robin. Sure, Terry became Batman at a young age, but he was older than Matt at the time. Bruce points out that Terry took the suit w/out permission and went out on his own when he wasn’t prepared, but that Matt has Terry to help him, which is beneficial to him. Out behind the Manor, Matt is wearing part of a new Robin suit, using the wings to fly. Bruce tells him that Matt will be in the game, with or without Terry’s permission. It wasn’t Bruce’s call to make, but now Terry has to coach him.

Bruce sees a lot of potential in Matt. With their parents dead, Terry is Matt’s legal guardian, and he really wanted this cleared with him, but Bruce explains that Payback forced his hand.

Melanie visits, and she’s still unaware that Terry and Batman are the same person. Melanie wants to start over with their friendship, and she’s been working hard to show him that she’s changed. Yes, she did a little B&E recently when she swiped that photo of Terry, and old habits die hard, but she’s working on it.

Melanie asks why Terry lives there with Bruce when he’s not related to Bruce, and Terry explains that it goes back to his job in high school as Bruce’s assistant. He then tells her that he knows that’s not why she’s there and asks why. She tells him she wants to know why he never came after her after she left the Royal Flush Gang – after all, they’d had a nice thing going there, between them. Terry tells her it’s because of stuff, life, fear. Melanie tells him that she saw that he helped Batman and that she’s been trying to prove that she’s changed, by helping people.

While this is going on, Dana is on her way to the Manor. Terry hasn’t returned any of her calls, and they need to talk. She doesn’t like this whole Batman business, but she loves him, and she’s sure that he loves her, so hopefully, she can convince him to stop being Batman. Except, of course, she walks in on Terry and Melanie kissing in the woods and silently walks away, tears in her eyes.

Matt actually interrupts their time together, though, because Bruce needs Terry right away. He tells Mel they’ll talk later when he’s done with whatever Bruce needs. In the Batcave, he finds out that Scab is back, and that he’s unhinged, which isn’t like his usual self, since he’s a trouble-maker, but not a murderer. He’s taken out cops, civilians, and other Jokerz.

Terry starts to suit up, but Matt arrives with the prototype Robin suit, ready to charge into action with him. Terry tells him that he’s not ready, but both Bruce and Matt oppose him, Bruce warning him that if Terry continues to deny Matt the chance to be Robin, then he’ll strike out on his own, implying that things won’t end well if he does that. Terry has to be the big brother and teach his brother how to be a superhero.

Matt is a bright, exuberant Robin, and Terry tells him to stay behind him and follow orders, a directive that Bruce echoes.

Inside the GCPD precinct, Scab is losing it, believing that his hostage works for the Bat. Barbara tries to convince him that he’s hallucinating, but Scab is having none of it. Batman and Robin arrive on the scene then, with Batman going after Scab while Robin goes to make sure that Commissioner Gordon is okay. She’s surprised at Robin’s appearance there. Robin offers to get Barbara to safety, but Barbara tells him that she can take care of herself.

Seeing Batman there exacerbates Scab’s condition, and he reaches into a bag and pulls out a gun, firing everywhere. Batman is able to deflect the bullets and take Scab down. Angry at Robin for not being able to get everyone to safety, he tells him that he’s done as Robin.

Adalyn Stern returns home, glad that Batman took care of Scab, even though she hasn’t been a Batman fan since she was a kid. Unfortunately for her, waiting for her in her apartment is a fearsome visage of Batman, promising her a one-way trip to hell.

What Just Happened?: With the exception of Dick Grayson first becoming Robin in 1940, no one has ever had an easy time of slipping on that particular cape or mask, and the same holds true for Matt McGinnis, who fans have always surmised would eventually don the mantle of Robin. Matt proves to be just as exuberant as his fore-Robins – bright, eager to help, joyous. Jurgens is clearly setting up a struggle between Matt and Terry, and hopefully, his foreshadowing about Matt striking out on his own doesn’t lead to dire consequences.

The Melanie-Terry-Dana triangle is one that was never quite explored in the animated series, given Melanie’s few appearances, and while her appearance here works to further divide Terry and Dana, one hopes that Melanie will be put to more use than that. She’s a fascinating, conflicted, complex character when written correctly, and she should be given that chance to come into her own and complete her redemption arc. Her reward shouldn’t be Terry or Batman, but she also shouldn’t just be the girl from the wrong side of the tracks who derails a relationship. Though, to be fair, Dana has been cast in a thankless role of late, and so it’s difficult not to root for Terry and Melanie, who are better matched in many ways.

While it’s not clear who the Bat-monster targeting the people of Gotham City might be, there are a couple of options for whom it would make sense. The first villain to come to mind is the Scarecrow or someone who has found the Scarecrow’s fear gas to manipulate people and cause them to hallucinate an evil Batman. There’s also Spellbinder, who of late has been one of Terry’s villains. With hypnosis and mind control abilities, it wouldn’t be far-fetched to think that he’s behind this mess.

Dan Jurgens has set up some classic plots here – people disapproving of Bruce Wayne bringing children into his crusade, the fear that Terry has about his brother becoming Robin, the triangle between Terry, Melanie, and Dana. They’re not groundbreaking stories by any means – which ones are these days? – but they are solid, and it’ll be interesting to see where this takes the characters as they move forward. One hopes that Matt becomes a solid, capable Robin, and it would be great to see Melanie given some development and forward momentum that allows her to stand side-by-side with Batman as the hero she so clearly wants to be. Terry’s condemnation of Matt as Robin at the end of the issue feels as though it comes a little too suddenly, but at the same time, it’s clear that Terry wants Matt off the field as soon as possible, and this was likely his idea of the best, quickest way to do it – and that’s sure to backfire spectacularly.

Marco Castiello’s art is solid, classic comic book art, easy to follow, and appropriately emotive. His take on Barbara Gordon seems a little younger than other versions of the Batman Beyond incarnation of the character, but it works. His take on Matt as Robin is excellent – Matt’s enthusiasm really leaps off the page. If there’s one complaint, it’s only a minor one in that Melanie Walker’s always had something of a specific hairstyle, and that seems swapped out here for a far more basic style, which detracts from the personality that her hair used to give her, as well as the visual cue that told the reader that the character on panel is Melanie. Granted, she’s also trying to change as a person, and what is a hairstyle change but not expository for a direction that a character wants to go in?

Rating: 7/10 Final Thoughts: This incarnation of the Batman Beyond book is heading into a better place than it was when it started out – there are long-term plot threads being added, and the conflict between the characters are well-written. If you’re looking for a classic superhero adventure story that doesn’t wrap itself up in meta-textual narrative or isn’t some complicated event but is still a fun, fulfilling read, this book is definitely recommended.

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Bruce and Terry disagree over Matt McGinnis' future as Robin. Meanwhile, one of the Jokerz goes from being a run-of-the-mill trouble-maker to someone far deadlier!  Bruce Wayne and Terry McGinnis disagree over Matt McGinnis' future as Robin – Matt wants to prove himself, but Terry firmly believes he isn't ready.

[cow3survivor]

Ep. 5: “Nothing to Report” - Jabari

JENNET 

jennet vs ethan? more like jennet + ethan😀😀😉😉

(a little later)

plan was a success, i know thats right!

ETHAN

Somehow the Pennino vote worked, and Pennino if you are reading this, you really are an amazing guy, and I hope we get a second chance someday. That being said, you are too smart and self-aware, and that is dangerous. For this round, the reward challenge is interesting. I haven't met everyone in the game yet, so I don't know if people are looking at challenge results yet, and I have done my best to have middling performances, but winning this would mean I get put in the spotlight again for winning 2 individual rewards, so that potentially makes me nervous. More than anything, I want to avoid tribal, I don't think there would be a repeat of last time if we go again. I anticipate a swap in 1-2 more votes, either to 2 or 4 tribes. Video conf coming soon :D

JABARI

The girls and I flopped on the reward challenge and Ethan came up like a beast. I really feel out tribe of 5 is doing well and hopefully we can pull win and stay together. If not I Imagine Sam will be out, as for idol searches nothing to report though I feel I am getting close.

JAKE

https://youtu.be/FM19WJ1tTmk witty catchphrase, y'know?

SAM

https://youtu.be/MrYZw3I22ms

JESSICA

Me when I found the idol: :) Me when the hosts told me I had to gamble my vote like 13 times in order to get it: :( I really wish we’d lost now so Nicole could be out and I could have an idol! If we don’t swap next time and it’s there, I’m taking the idol and throwing the challenge. Then we can vote Nicole out and I can have an idol! Will my allies be suspicious that I didn’t vote at that tribal? Not if it’s unanimous for Nicole which you KNOW I’d be doing the work to make happen. If we do swap, I’ll probably go get the idol anyways UNLESS we swap to tribes of 5 and my tribe is bad. But even then, I might as well go get it because I could play it that round if I needed to. Um not much else happened this round! I hope we merge soon.

LINDSAY

sorry ur getting text today ok im so fucin ajfdkhsakjlfhsalkjfhskjfhksjd i hate this anyways i think the tribe is split into two duos and then me - jennet and jabari /ethan and sam. pennino was kinda my duo but also eh. i think ethan has an idol or at the very least an advantage. a f r a i d not sure what to do. could stick w jennet and jabari and hope for the best or preemptively flip and try to make it w ethan and sam... i think there'll be a tribe swap soon but ajsfhsaldfhsdkj afraid if there's too few calumma come merge we'll be fucked but sokka pulled it off before it's not impossible we'll be okay depending. but if i piss off jennet or jabari calumma might not vibe w me following so i'll be stuck at the bottom of the totem pole w old not calumma and that's not a good spot to be either.  :( my "lets do something fun" says lets flip fuck it, but my loyal ass/wants to make it to merge this game ass says sticking w calumma is my best bet. jabari was posting cryptic shit last night so im gonna lead into that and see what hapepns anyways fuck this tribal. fuck tribal. i love all of these people i dont want to vote them out like genuinely there's no one here i want to see gone i HATE THIS anyways if i flip on calumma id probably go jennet bc she's a bigger threat than jabari iirc and if i stay loyal i'd probably aim for ethan bc sam is the more obvious target i... think?

JONES

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ApcRUkdtxm4

JENNET

going go tribal again im SUPER nervous... i formed a tight alliance with ethan and sam and i feel bad for betraying the girls but this will help propel me in the long run and i have to take this shot

JESSICA

REALLY hoping we don't swap tonight...... that way I can instantly go get the idol! Or if we do swap, I hope I stay on Calumma. I think I should have actually just gone for the idol but I was worried about needing my vote at next tribal and not knowing what's ahead. Like imagine if I went for it, I lost my vote, and I only got the idol to be good for one round. Or for no rounds. It literally would have been useless and I would hate to swap and have no idol AND no vote. At least now if we swap, I definitely have one of those things! I'm not interested in gambling everything to get nothing so it just didn't seem like a smart choice. I did consider taking it and only gambling once just so Nicole definitely didn't get the idol but that didn't seem like a good idea. She only has like a 1/25 chance of finding it IF she's been guessing every single day and even if she does find it and we don't swap, my guess is Pete will want to throw his vote on Mikey which is fine with me because that is their relationship that will be affected, not mine. 24/25 odds Nicole has no idol is better than a 1/13 chance of losing my vote right? I'm honestly not sure as I still to this day cannot do any math <3 I have been saying this whole game I think we're going to swap at 15 into 3 tribes of 5 so hopefully I am wrong! And we swap at 14 or even better do not swap at all again until the merge. At least I will know who could have the idol if we swap. Narrowing this down is useful, as is knowing that the all 3 pre-merge tribe idols likely have expirations close to final 8/9 and probably aren't good until f5. Plus I'll get the chance to try and get another idol from a different tribe (or find out that someone else already has it too!). You may notice I didn't mention my other teammates in this confessional. Well that is because none of them are really here and nothing is going on since we've been winning. I have still been talking to Mikey and Pete on and off but Lovelis seems to be pretty busy so he hasn't been here. And Nicole...... has left me on read again. We just do not know what is going on there.

LOVELIS

WOO we won immunity!! I'm anticipating a swap soon so I'm tryna stay as cool with Mikey and Nicole as I can just in case I'm put on a tribe with them again, but I do hope I can stay with Shane or Jessica in the future because those two are the ones I get on with the most for sure, and I'd feel more comfortable moving forward on a tribe with them for now! I don't think Nicole has any trust in me after the Nash elimination so I'd be more weary if I had to work with her in order to save myself in the long run, but let's see what the future holds shall we!

SAM

https://youtu.be/F0Zt0L8lScA

ETHAN

Ok this tribal is terrifying. Apparently lindsay and jabari are trying to blindside me by telling me the vote is Sam, and this could be a super good bait from Jennet to try to get Sam to idol. If they’re playing logically, they vote Sam if that’s the case anyways. It wouldn’t make much sense for Jennet to spill, not vote with us, and vote for me, I hope these people are logical, because I’m operating under the assumption that they are.

MADISON

I honestly have to laugh at Shane messing up 2 times during the challenges, us having the lowest counting score, and still being immune at the end of the day. It's truly beautiful. Daisy won the reward so she will be attending the tribal tonight and I hope she can give us an idea of how the dynamics are on another tribe. It's hard when there hasn't really been much to do on Brookesia so having a little bit of info could go a long way in this game.

NICOLE

Hello! So we won. I was having a little bit of a hard time this round if I'm being honest so I'm glad we won immunity because I think I definitely would have hit the road if we did not. Logic puzzles are really gonna be my legacy in this game huh...anyway, I have been searching for idols everyday and have not found ANYTHING except a second guess which I already used to find nothing. Even worse it seems that everywhere I look something has already been found! Which means other people have things! Which stinks. But, I think I'm in a pretty good spot if we swap after this round.  But if we stay on this tribe....yikes!

JENNET 

super nervous, i have TWO alliances with the same name... hoping that helps me at tribal so when i say the name of it, both groups thinks its them😳😳

(a little later)

told ethan and sam what jabari and lindsay have planned for them... hoping it doesnt blow up in my face

(after searching for an idol)

was hoping to vote out lindsay bc shes been playing this like shes our leader but shes the stronger competitor and i dont want to push sam and ethan too much

SHANE

https://drive.google.com/drive/folders/1-RKbRCfntNc75XUsCg7iKmFfxne0qcMt

SAMMY

i feel like this game is nonexistent lately...I do want to say Shane is lucky bc in the counting challenge he messes up like 2-3 times and i was like ...blinks.... idk but luckily we managed to escape tribal council once again so our odds going far and having numbers are pretty high I’d say? I feel like a swap is coming tho so I’m a bit nervous! My confessionals are gonna remain dry for now sorry mwah

DAISY

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fuVm7kTkEL4 ugh sorry its so shitty this didnt go as planned and i give up. love u all. kiss kisss

PETE

I’m pretty sure Nicole may still get numbers against me when the time comes. I’m nervous for a merge but honestly i’ll be grateful if I even make it to one for the first time lmao like at this point I may have a few numbers but I’m hoping another struggling alliance picks Jessica and I up at the merge and we can rest in majority for a little bit at the start of it. I was thinking about maybe throwing one challenge so we can either A. Vote off Nicole who is a big threat and could do damage later on. or B. Vote off Mikey who could be a secret snake which could win a couple more trust points with Nicole and maybe pick up and ally there. I’m not sure. I did save Nicole in one light by redirecting my alliance’s target from her to Nash, but in another, I didn’t side with her in voting off Mikey so she lost her ally. It’s complex, I feel like throwing a challenge AND not throwing a challenge could both be the mistake I look back on when I get voted out later on. i dunno send help lmao

TRIBAL COUNCIL

JABARI EXIT INTERVIEW