#like. i don't want it to be true. if it's true that means i can't forgive him this time and i can't go back

[yazthebookish]

Maybe I'll spoil you guys and talk about Gwynriel and ACOTAR5 and anything related to it overall. I recently finished my HOFAS reread and have some fresh thoughts. I'll let my thoughts guide me and some of these points I've already addressed in my insta stories yesterday. I just rather share a lengthy post here since I'll only tag under #gwynriel.

I often see arguments about how Gwyn and Azriel can't move the plot forward because the series is centered on the Archeron sisters.

First, that's not true because Sarah is following what she called "a traditional romance route". She's following the same patterns of Nalini Singh, Kresley Cole, and Lisa Kleypas where they publish multiple books in the same series following different couples.

This is fitting for a series like ACOTAR because it's romance-centered. And Sarah have already said that each couple is getting one book and there will likely be more books beyond ACOTAR6.

Saying that doesn't dismiss the importance of the sisters to the story, Feyre already has a trilogy centered on her. The spin-off just follows different characters including the sisters.

I won't try hard to convince people on this because I've already posted almost everything Sarah said about the spin-off series and what's it's about. So if the next book is not centered on an Archeron sister, that's for Sarah to bamboozle the fandom with.

One thing that stuck out to me is when I compared the ending of ACOSF with the scene of Bryce giving Nesta Gwydion and seeming like she left Nesta with a new quest.

First, this is what the text says, and this is Chapter 80, the very last chapter in ACOSF:

Succeeding in the Blood Rite didn't mean the training stopped. No, after she and her friends told Cassian and Azriel most of the details of their ordeal, the two commanders had compiled a long list of mistakes that the three of them had made that needed to be corrected, and the others wanted to learn from them, too. So they would keep training, until they were all well and truly Valkyries. Gwyn, despite the Rite, had returned to living in the library.

1. The Valkyries are not yet a unit.

2. SJM only and specifically highlighted that Gwyn, despite the Rite, returned to living in the library. It was like "hey, remember all the talk Gwyn did about wanting to leave the library after two years? Yeah that's on hold a bit but keep that in mind". She didnt even add Emerie or the other priestesses to that sentence.

With Nesta being left with Gwydion to find out why the 8-pointed star was tattooed on her, I don't think the next book will start with "hey Elain take this sword and deal with it". Who are Nesta's main companions now? Gwyn and Emerie.

I'll be back to the Valkyries but let's just talk about Azriel for a bit.

It is so painfully obvious to me that Azriel is being handed the Illyrian plot on a golden platter. How big or small of a plot it is depends on SJM, but it's important based on the fact that she fleshed out the Illyrian's origins and tied them to the crossover AND making Truth-teller the knife of Enalius.

That is a big deal for an Illyrian like Azriel.

And I quote my friend Lacie on this, it is very poetic for Azriel to be the owner of the knife that originally belonged to the person who freed his own people from the Daglan's clutches, perhaps because he saw his people are more than just slaves to the Daglan—how powerful would it be for Azriel, who loathes his own people, to parallel Enalius.

And for years some people were against Azriel dealing with this plot because he shouldn't make peace with his "abusers", its true his own family and some Illyrians failed him but he is condemning an entire population. Good people like Emerie and Balthazar. Even Rhys's mother, who had valid reasons to hate her people especially as a female, still made sure to make Rhysand connect with his Illyrian heritage and he even goes on to say that his mother didn't forget what they did to her but still loved her people.

If both Cassian and Rhysand (and by extension the author) continue to flag Azriel's hatred of the Illyrians as an issue—then it is a damn big issue for it to be addressed repeatedly.

Okay so to address my final point about Gwyn and Azriel and how they can move the plot forward.

Now I didn't detail out much about what the next book will deal with because that's another post (and I already have a post on that).

All of our theories and predictions are based on information that is available to us. Saying Azriel and Gwyn cannot move the plot forward does not make any sense because the central plot is tied to multiple characters, Archeron or not.

If SJM wants to make a character move the next book's plot forward, she can do it because she's in control of the story. She's in control of the narrative. She's in control of the characters.

The characters are puppets and this is an unfinished story. If some characters would add more value and make for a more interesting story before the others, she can decide on that. If she wants to make Eris the protagonist of the next book, she can easily do that whether the fandom wants it or not.

Let me give you an example of minor characters that pushed the plot forward and became main characters: Yrene Towers and the Hind. These kind of arguments could've been used for them in HOEAB or HOSAB and Pre-TOD. Before HOSAB/HOFAS and TOD, could we have predicted that they would have played a crucial role before those books? Not likely because they had minimal appearances and were not part of the main cast. This is what I'm talking about.

You can't know how a character will contribute to a story until you see how it all unfolds. We can make guesses on the information we have which is why I believe three characters are likely to join the main cast: Gwyn, Emerie, and Eris.

Why is it so easy to accept that Emerie might be sharing a book with an original character like Mor but it's hard to comprehend the fact that Gwyn could also share a book with Azriel? Because Emerie showed up in ACOFAS? To me that's not really a strong argument based on Sarah's writing and what we have in the books, she doesn't really pick based on who showed up the earliest. Here's a good example: Hypaxia, who showed up earlier, didn't even get her own chapters but the Hind did.

And there's one argument I recall about how I need to rely on Nesta to have a plot focused on Gwyn or the Valkyries in the next book. Nesta's arc is clearly not over based on HOFAS, but does that mean she's getting a POV? Not necessarily. I don't think she is. Gwyn is the perfect candidate for us to see what's going on with Nesta post-HOFAS and how they all deal with the Valkyries and whatever Sarah will set up with them.

There is this whole Valkyrie/Illyrian conflict that could be triggered as a result of the Blood Rite, with Ramiel definitely being an important location to explore in the next book, we also have the Pegasi and the Prison and the implications of the crossover. It makes sense to have an Illyrian and a Valkyrie POV to deal with some plots in the next book.

"Gwyn contributes to nothing" we can't know until the book is out. How sure are we that maybe SJM won't connect her to the crossover by making her mysterious father a Worldwalker? Or Prince of Hel? Or an Asteri? Maybe I'm right maybe I'm wrong.

"But Koschei! And the Human Queens!" Koschei will always be a background player pulling on the strings until the final book as it's obvious he is the big bad in the series, unless someone even worse is revealed. But no one is dismissing Koschei or the Human Queens messing around.

Literally what's the point of the story or the fun elements of surprises or plot twists if you need Sarah to list down everything that the next books will deal with. That's not how a story develops to me. I don't need to know everything in advance to just know how it will go. That's like knowing spoilers early on and checking off with each book what happened and what didn't happen. I feel like it's close to how a lot of readers were disappointed with not having enough ACOTAR in HOFAS, because Sarah implied half of the book would be set in Prythian. So by the time the book came out and it wasn't that, people were vocal about it.

In my opinion, SJM set a good foundation for Gwyn's arc to build up on in ACOSF and her arc is not over. We won't get mentions of her still carrying the guilt of her sister's death or not leaving the library after she said she's sick of being there for two years without us seeing resolution for that. She wouldn't be in Azriel's bonus chapter if she is not involved with him.

To conclude, my reread still affirms to me that the next book with an Azriel/Gwyn book. Azriel is clearly being set in the forefront.

[interstellarrisa]

𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋ Quotes to keep in mind 𝄞⨾𓍢ִ໋

a/n: these are just things that i like to keep in mind whilst manifesting/shifting and is not something you must do! also if you recognize your or someone else's quote/saying, pls dm or comment so that i can give credits!!! (i'm sleepy so sorry for any mistakes or if things don't rlly make sense -o-)

# Nothing needs to be harder than it sounds

It's just as you read. You don't need to make it any harder by adding complicating methods or trying to reprogram your subconscious. Decide, imagine and persist is all there is. You can decide how you'll do the "imagine" part. You can affirm, visualize, script or listen to subliminal. Do whatever you want, it's you manifesting it but I don't really recommend adding in unnecessary things as things can get tangled up and make you feel like you're doing anything except "getting" your manifestation.

# Imagination is the true reality

You've probably heard this like a thousand times but if you just think about it, if imagination is the true reality then why try to get it in the physical one? Since I can just imagine it and have it there and eventually it'll materialize. Also why struggle with it inside your imagination? Just as when some people when they were younger used to have imaginary friends. Just because they didn't see their friends body in the physical reality or that others couldn't see them did not mean they never existed. They did, just in that child's imagination and that's what matters. Having it in your mind and believing in yourself. Affirming this helps me with feeling fulfilled internally.

# Observe don't absorb

I really like this one cause like this is how I usually manifest away bad circumstances. Even if the 3D is right up in my face and is unavoidable I'll keep a idgaf mindset and continue on not taking it in as final or that it can't be changed. Nothing's set in stone, not even reality. If you don't like it just change it. There's no need to take the bad things as final. Know who you are and do your thing! At nighttime sometimes when we fall asleep random thoughts will pop up and pass us by, do you pay attention to every single thought? Do you react to every single one of those or think more deeply about them? Just as we observe those thoughts passing us by we should also observe reality. As a movie we're watching on our TV and if we don't like it we just switch to another one. Not get up and start screaming about how it's bad and that it's not the one we want to watch. Just switch movie.

Thank you for reading, good luck with your manifesting/shifting and bye!!<3

art cred @ CHIARA63710634 @ mors_gn @ riiein (all on twt)

[verdemint]

So this video is my beznaia thesis! You can really see their dynamic and how they work with each other. This is just after India last year, Bezz won the race (his third of the year) and Pecco crashed out of the race. You have Bezz "trashtalking" Pecco a little bit to cheer him up, but it's not mean, Pecco is clearly in on the joke. And then the interviewer is trying to get Pecco to talk about his fall and pecco is kinda uncomfortable/pissed off and Bezz tries to direct the attention of the interviewer back at him, letting Pecco go. And then we have Bezz talking about his friendship with Pecco and how much Pecco is a real friend to him.

They treat each other as equals, they love trash-talking and fighting a bit but it's clear how Pecco is much more comfortable in front of cameras whenever Bezz is also there. You can feel how they truly value each other presence and the comfort they find in each other, it's just super cute to witness lol. It's obvious how much Bezz cares and respects Pecco, Pecco is just "much more mature!" a true adult in a way, and it's true in all aspects of their life, but Bezz is also the only one able to bring Pecco down to earth in a way, he sees right through him. All the academy guys are very much a little pack, always protecting each other in interviews and stuff but these two are each other comfort zone in that insane sport. This is getting a bit RPF but idc, it's just such a cute friendship :)

Translation lol

*Pecco is doing a gesture, "ti faccio un culo così" meaning something like "next time when I get u! I'm gonna beat u!" OBV HES JOKING*

Bez: “Come here! ... Do I have to come to you?...He wants to let me have my moment! … Can I say something tho? Whenever I’m in front of him during the race he crashes out”

Pecco arrives there

Pecco: “I don't want to be like parsley (lol meaning someone who’s everywhere, all the time, intruding in Bezz’ moment)” I: “What did u say Bezz?” B: “Whenever I’m in front he crashes out!” P: “I feel the mental pressure” B: “He’s not used to it, usually he’s always the one in front of me, the few times I’m first he can't deal with that!” … the interviewer starts talking with Pecco saying that sometimes it's more difficult to lead a race and not make any mistakes than being second and trying to catch up, asking Pecco if that's maybe why he crashed out.  Pecco a bit annoyed :“I crashed out of the race coz I crashed out of the race … Bez to the interviewer: “Stop asking him stuff, he’s angry after the race, it’s normal!” Pecco: “Let's talk about Bez, he was the best today!” Pecco runs away lol I: “Anyway, the relationship you two have is beautiful.” Bezz: “Pecco and I are close friends, I’ve found a fantastic friend in Pecco. It’s difficult sometimes being rivals and friends, but we’re both adults and mature, Pecco a little bit more!” Pecco is looking and touching the bike, “fake-checking” the brakes Bez: “This time I was there! I was braking better eh” Back to some trash-talking

[nerd-at-sea5]

are u pro palestine... we have the same interests but i dnt want to follow u if ur weird

honestly this blog is for silly little thoughts about lesbians and such and the occasional personal story or opinion but it’s about time i got one of these. so buckle up long post ahead and it’s not gonna be a cut and paste yes/no answer bc yeah. just read the thing

first of all: im jewish. raised jewish and will forever be jewish. i'm proud of it. i'm not super religious and don't really believe in god but that doesn't mean i'm any less jewish.

second: i believe in a 2 state solution. i don't like terrorists. i think hamas needs to be held accountable for the murders and horrors they've committed, because frankly i think they're a bunch of monsters and terrible people. i don't agree with a lot of the stuff that netanyahu does either because that stuff is also not ok. but overall: fuck hamas.

that being said, i believe that israel has the right to exist. i believe that the jews deserve a homeland where we can be safe. i believe that a 2 state solution is the safest and smartest option. but i will also say that as the correct and historically accurate definition of zionism is to believe in the movement and protection of the jewish state - i am a zionist and i am not going to shy away from what i believe in.

i am aware that people will not like this about me, and i am aware they will try to tell me things about myself that are not true. so i am going to set the record straight and go back to posting about my silly little tv shows.

israel has a right to exist and to defend itsself

hamas are terrorists and should not be in power

i am in favor of a 2 state solution

the people of gaza don't deserve to live in horrible conditions because of the terrorists in power

jews and israeli's don't deserve the hate and abuse that they're experiencing because of people who don't know how to fact check

the hostages should be home. this is non-negotiable, they should be home.

and again - im aware that this isn't the yes/no answer you want, but i can't give that to you because its much more complicated than that.

lastly, if you want to unfollow me for any of these things please go ahead, i don't care. i implore you to fact check yourself before sending hate and threats to people online or in real life (or assaulting/hurting people, seriously just don’t do that.)

if you pick and choose who to engage with online due to political opinions that's up to you, but a difference in opinions isnt 'weird' its just human.

[sinfulpanda16]

Amazing Classmate

Midoriya, Bakugou, Uraraka, Todoroki x foreigner reader

You are an international student in U.A and meet all of Class 1-A. What are their reactions to seeing you for the first time? How do you guys bond together despite the differences in nationalities?

(n/l) = native language (y/c) = your country

Midoriya

Is fascinated by you

He tries to learn your language by taking notes

When he saw you for the first time, he was starstruck. Your features are so beautiful, and he can't help but to blush a bit when you make eye contact with him. He decides to be a good friend towards you because he didn't want you to feel too different. You two become good friends and when he asks if you can help him learn your native language it made you feel a sense of warmth. You happily agreed, you would tell him 'The Word of the Day' and he would write it down in his notebook.

Izuku waits for you to think of a word. When you finally do you look at him with a smile, "The word of the day is, (random word in your language)."

Midoriya smiles brightly, "Ok! How do you spell that?" he asks getting ready to write in his notebook. You spell it out for him and go on to translate the word in Japanese. You explain to him how you would you use it in a sentence and Midoriya is writing it all down.

It makes you happy that Midoriya is so dedicated to learning your (n/l). He's learned so much from you and is almost able to have a full conversation with you in your mother's tongue. In a way he makes you feel at home.

He does it all because he wants to. He really likes you and where you come from. He likes all of you.

Uraraka

Strives to be more like you

You are so inspirational in her eyes

She walks into the common room and sees you sitting on the couch. She's hasn't been motivated to do much recently and doesn't know why. You have made it clear to all of Class 1-A that you're a safe space and are there for them. Uraraka figures maybe she can talk to you, so she takes a deep breath in and makes her way towards you on the couch.

"Hey (Y/N)" she waves shyly and sits down next to you.

You look from your phone and give her a smile. "Hey what's up?" you ask.

She looks at your eyes and she finds them so beautiful. She can't help but to turn away shyly. "Oh, it's nothing really. I just figured I could use some advice."

You turn off your phone and give her your undivided attention. You allow her to tell you her thoughts and feelings. You listen closely and after she explains everything, she looks at you, "I don't how (Y/N). What should I do?"

You chuckle a bit and begin to answer her question. "Back where I'm from they have a famous saying." Uraraka listens closely. You explain to her a quote your people back at home say a lot. It's something that people tell each other to help them feel better. After you finish explaining you look at her, "It's ok Uraraka. You're human so there's no need to beat yourself up for feeling more tired than usual. I'd recommend going on a walk. That always makes me feel better and productive". You give her a warm smile and say the quote in you language.

She looks at you with her big eyes and then chuckles. "Thanks (Y/N). Thats means a lot. You and your people are really something." she laughs.

You smile, it's true. You're proud of your blood and culture. And Uraraka is also proud of you for that.

Bakugou

Admires you from afar

At first he could've cared less about you, but your just so intriguing

He's sitting in the common room lost in thought and he sees you come out of the elevator. You two make eye contact and you smile brightly. You say, "Hi Bakugou." in your native language. He and all of class 1-A already know the word for Hi in your language because you always say it.

Bakugou just grunts, but that doesn't mean he's not willing to talk with you. You don't mind him and make your way to the kitchen to make yourself something to eat. You been enjoying cold soba ever since Todoroki recommended it to you. He was onto something cuz cold soba hits every time.

Bakugou knew you've been eating a lot of soba cuz of Todoroki and it bothered him. He wasn't sure why, but it did. He calls out for you "Oi! (Y/n)." you look up from what you were doing and look at him. Your eye contact always makes him feel a certain type of way. He can never hold eye contact with you. He looks away and abruptly says the first thing that came to his mind, "Teach me some curse words. You know...in (n/l)."

His request is so random, but you laugh, "Alright".

So that's what you do. You teach him all your favorite curse words in your native language. It makes you laugh because he honestly sounds and looks good cursing in your language.

This helped you two get closer and after you left, he found himself smirking. Just everything about you intrigues him and that includes your culture and language. And you can bet that after that he yells curse words at any extra in your native language.

Shoto

Is respectful to you and your culture

You and him both have your struggles and are always there for each other

You were feeling down and were in your dorm room. You love Japan but just like everyone else who moves countries, you get homesick. You sat at your desk looking at a photo of you and your friends back home. You miss them like hell. Long distance relationships are not easy. You hear a knock at your door and already know its Todoroki cuz of the way he knocks. You call out for him to come in.

He opens your door and walks inside, "Hi (Y/N). Are you busy-" he's caught off guard cuz he can tell something isn't right. He can tell your feeling down.

You raise an eyebrow at him, "Is everything ok?" you ask when he stops speaking mid-sentence.

"I don't know. Is it?" is all Shoto says in his soft voice, and you're taken aback. In all those months Todoroki managed to read you like a book. Honestly, you learned to do the same with him.

You smile softly, "I'm ok Todoroki. I just feel a bit homesick."

He walks towards you, "Oh. You miss (y/c)?" he asks sitting down on your bed. You nod your head and look back at the photo of your friends, "Yeah. I mainly just miss my friends and family. It's been a while since I've seen them in person." you explain.

Todoroki can only imagine what that must feel like. He sometimes misses his family, his mother, even though they're all with him in Japan. He doesn't want you to feel sad, so he suggests doing something to ease your mind.

"(Y/N) me and our friends were going to go to mall together." he reaches to hold your hand, "Please come. I promise it'll make you feel better." he says looking into your eyes.

You smile softly. Although your childhood friends are back in (y/c), that doesn't mean you're all alone here. You have amazing friends like Todoroki and the rest of Class 1-A to be with. You back into his eyes, "Ok. Thanks, Shoto."

He gives you his soft and cute smile, "You're welcome (Y/N)".

[madhatterbri]

Opportunity | D.P.

Summary: Reader and Damian are friends and are basically in love, but they don't know it. Damian sees Reader getting harassed by an ex or a fan or whatever and tries to defuse the situation, but ends up beating the guy up lol smut and confessions of love follow soon after?

Author's Note: Happy Monday Night RAW, babes. 🫶

Damian Priest Masterlist

Requested by @eringobragh420

Taglist: @theworldofotps @mrsarcherofinfamy @brideofinfamy @miss-kuki-nz @terrortwinunicorn @magicalbuttertarts @new-zealand-chic @smallestsnarkestgirl

"I don't know, man. We just always have something going on and never seem to take us to the next step," Damian sighed. He was out drinking with some friends. It was true. Now that he and Y/N were single, he thought they would finally take their friendship to the next level. She seemed scared when he asked her about it. The wrestler never dreamed about the reasoning behind her rejecting him.

The archer of infamy was worried when she didn't answer his calls. He could count all the times she didn't answer on one hand. Y/N had told him days ago that she was still dealing with the mess. Once she didn't answer his text or call again, he went outside.

Y/N backed into her car. Her ex stood in front of her. His arms on both sides of her trapped her between himself and the car. Tears rolled down her cheeks as she looked away. The smell of alcohol lingered on his breath. He wouldn't leave her alone. She thought of Damian. Her beacon of light in a world full of darkness.

"You're never going to get rid of me," he threatened. "I will always be watching you,"

Her ex-boyfriend was suddenly pulled off of her. She watched in awe as her best friend, Damian, beat the crap out of him. When her ex started to lose consciousness, Y/N pulled him off of her. The angered man rubbed his black hair.

"How long has he been harassing you, huh? Why didn't you tell me?" He demanded. His heart broke when he saw her shrink back. The look of hurt and betrayal in her eyes burned in his skull. Damian took a deep breath and apologized.

"I'm sorry. Let me take you to my place. We will get your car in the morning,"

The drive was painfully quiet. Silent tears rolled down her cheeks. She was embarrassed. Y/N never wanted him to know what he did to her. She didn't want anyone to know.

When they made it back to his place, he comforted her. They talked about what was really going on in the past few months. The guy was a major asshole. One that she should have never linked up with.

"I just didn't want to feel alone," she admitted.

Damian placed a hand on hers. His thumb rubbed her soft skin. "You had me. You know I would never do anything like that to you,"

"I don't want to lose you, D. What if we don't work? I can't lose you," Y/N confessed. A fresh set of tears rolled down her cheeks. He wiped them away and pulled her close.

"Don't think of it like that. I love you, Y/N. I don't ever want to lose you either,"

"I love you too," she admitted. Her voice cracked.

The rest of the night was spent talking. She started to feel better and apologized for keeping it from him. By the time they went to bed, she had a permanent smile on her face. They confessed they loved each other. Something she thought would never happen.

Y/N woke up bright and early the next morning. She started to make them breakfast in the kitchen. He must have smelled the food because he appeared behind her a few minutes later. She still wore one of his shirts that he lent her.

"Wow, a beautiful girl making me breakfast? How did I get so lucky?"

She smiled and turned around. "Just a thank you for last night. You are the absolute best, D,"

"That's not the only thing that happened last night. Did you mean it?"

"Mean what?"

"When you told me you loved me," he answered.

"I've never been more sure about anything else in my life,"

A smile broke on his handsome face. "I feel the same way. Can I kiss you?"

Y/N leaned in and kissed him. She waited for those words for so long. There was no way that she was going to let a single second pass. His hands explored her body. They rested on the small of her back. He wanted to keep her close. She was never running away from him again.

Finally, the pair pulled away for some air.

"I want to show you how much I love you, Y/N. What can I do to show-"

Damian was cut off the moment her lips found his once more. Her hand rested against his cheek. She grabbed his hand and led him to his bedroom. He kicked the door closed behind him.

His hands reached under her shirt. He slid his hands up. The shirt was removed from her body, exposing her to him. He sucked in his breath. Brown eyes scanned her body from head to toe. She was perfect. Now left in only her underwear, she took a step back. The back of her knees hit against the bed.

She propped herself on her elbows. He removed his own shirt and threw it to the side. Damian leaned down to kiss her. His teeth pulled her bottom lip.

Y/N's body was worshipped by him. Her neck kissed as he praised her. His lips traveled south. Her nipples licked and teased. She squirmed under him. Her moans filled the room. Soft pants and calls for his name filled his ears.

His fingers snuck inside her panties. Her skin felt him smirk when he felt the damp fabric. She called his name when he applied pressure to her clit. His finger circled around her bundle of nerves.

The build-up in Y/N's lower stomach grew. She tried to close her legs, but he held her thigh. His dark eyes watched her facial expressions. She was in cloud nine, and this was all from his actions.

Damian pulled away from her. Fingers hooked her underwear and pulled them down. He tossed them to the side. He stood up. "Are you sure about this?"

"I want you, Damian," she promised. "More than I've ever wanted anyone before,"

Damian stripped. Y/N's eyes took all of him in. He kissed her lips softly and thrusted inside of her with ease. He groaned in her lips. His thrusts were slow at first. Once her pleasured sounds filled his ears, his thrusts picked up the pace. Her calls for his name turned him on more.

The pressure in her stomach grew. It felt like a rubber band about to snap. She wanted to wait until he finished. All this was for her. She resolved to finish last, but other plans were in the way.

His hand found her clit again. She begged him to stop. That he should finish first. He laughed and told her nonsense.

"Be a good girl for me,"

Her whole body tensed around him. Toes curled and sheets from underneath were gripped tightly. Damian tried to fuck her through it, but the pleasure was too intense. He stilled inside of her, his seed painting her walls.

When he caught his breath, he placed his forehead to hers. His breath tickled her.

"I love you, Y/N, and I will never waste this opportunity with you,"

[brittscafe]

𝐒𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐄𝐧𝐞𝐦𝐢𝐞𝐬

Pairing: Byakuya Kuchiki, Jushiro Ukitake, Shinji Hirako, Shunsui Kyoraku, and Kisuke Urahara x fem! reader (separately)

Summary: Byakuya, Ukitake, Shinji, Shunsui, and Urahara x fem! enemy reader

Request: I love your blog sm its insaneee!! Could you do bleach men (byakuya,ukitake,shunsui, urahara,shinji (you can change or do one of them)) with a frenemy (friend + enemy but more on the enemy) type of relation with the reader. Where she teases (flirts ;)) and annoys them and how they react to her

A/n: Hiiii!! Omg thank you so much <3 This was so cute

Content: Lots of teasing for our bleach men, slight cursing.

Ko-fi link (anything is appreciated <3)

Byakuya:

He's more on the serious side when it comes to you teasing him or annoying him.

He can totally keep his cool when you're annoying him, just sitting there and doing paperwork as you're trying to distract him.

He speaks like a true gentlemen when addressing you, but don't think that he won't call you out or say mean things in a gentlemenly tone.

Byakuya knows how to keep his calm when you're teasing him, but his ears and cheeks start to heat up.

On the inside though, his heart is ramming against his chest and he's trying to keep his cool.

You know and you Byakuya could bicker for ages and describe how much you despise one another, but deep down the two of you are enjoying it.

I think that Byakuya would find bickering more annoying and gets easily annoyed, but he's got a little more patience when it comes to you.

Gets nervous when you flirt with him and is at a loss of words.

At first, he can't tell if he likes it or not, but with time, he comes to have a love hate relationship with your flirting.

Jushiro:

He gets so flustered when you tease him, even though you guys are technically enemies.

You can tell when he gets flustered bc his cheeks turn all pink and you like to tease him even more.

He's such a sweetheart, he can't see you as his enemy.

You find it so funny to tease Jushiro and see the way his jaw drops and how he reacts.

You can and try and annoy him all you want, but Jushiro will never find it too annoying to the point where he's done with you.

You'll flirt with him, rubbing his arms or feeling his abs underneath his captain's uniform.

Jushiro's face bursts into a flame and his heart beats against his chest as you're touching him.

He honestly really enjoys your hate-love relationship and it brings him some entertainment.

You know Jushiro's condition and would never do anything to bring him harm like that.

Jushiro likes seeing your soft side when it comes to his condition, but you will flip back to that enemy side.

Regardless, he enjoys your relationship.

Shunsui:

Your friend-enemy friendship/relationship is perfect for Shunsui. He loves it.

He's easygoing and lazy, which makes it easy for you to tease him restlessly.

Shunsui tests you to your limits and isn't afraid to. He knows you can handle it.

Def tries to feel you up with his hands all the time and you don't allow it.

You're always competing with Shunsui and he doesn't really see it as a threat since he's literally at the top. He thinks its cute and funny.

It takes a lot to really rock Shunsui and affect him with all the teasing and flirting you do.

He'll flirt right back with you and then the two of you play a little game, see whoever backs away first. Hint: It's not Shunsui.

The two of you have a very flirty and playful relationship and everyone sees it.

Shunsui's reactions consist of him just shooting you a smirk and a flirty comment right back at you.

He's very calm and just really loves to have that stupid little grin on his face.

Kisuke:

He def plays mind games with you and isn't afraid to make things a little more physical.

You'll have little play fights or more serious fights where the two of you are using your swords and kudo.

Little teasing jokes in between sword swings and mocking comments.

He wears a sly smirk or grin on his face when he knows he's getting to you.

Kisuke knows how to use his words against you and you know exactly how to tease Kisuke.

He's just a pervy shop owner, touches get him all hot and heavy, words slipping out from his mind.

There's definitely times where you're teasing Kisuke with your hands and then pins you up against a wall.

Kiskuke is super smart and knows exactly how to react to you.

His reactions aren't big at all and the two of you have a super playful relationship.

Shinji:

The king of teasing, finally gets a taste of his own medicine.

It takes a lot to break Shinji and make him flustered, but you're the one who can do it.

The two of you go back and forth teasing each other until one of you breaks, like little teasing fights.

Shinji would totally love to play fight with all the time.

He'll pick you up and swing you around. He really loves to pin you to the ground and get super close to your face, lips inches apart then tickle attack you.

Shinji can deal with a lot, so no matter how much you try to annoy him, he won't budge until he does.

When Shinji does, he takes matters into his own hands and just annoys the shit out of you.

He honestly loves it when you try to annoy him. It's a source of entertainment.

You'll have like little wars with each other, battling each other with your swords, neither one of you backing down.

Shinji can be mean and brutal with his words just as you are.

He just finds the whole thing funny, but cares for you deep down.

The two of you have lots of fun, bickering, teasing, and annoying each other.

[sweet-little-raven]

*Sigh* Wednesday is trending again, which means that the kiddos out there are gonna start drama again. Please just stop; this is one of the reason why the show was called cringe a year ago and people left the fandom.

1- You have the right to ship Wyler et Wavier. This is your opinion, your preference and I respect it. So why, mainly Wavier shippers, are suddenly back at attacking Wenclair shippers for no reason at all on Tumblr, Twitter and basically every single social media? What are you, 12? Is this hard to respect people's opinions???

2- Stop shipping Jenna and Emma. I'm almost certain this is the reason why we can't tag Emma on Instagram anymore. Ever since the Chappell Roan videos got out, a lot of people have made weird comments saying that they kissed or that they were on a date. Just stop. Stop shipping real people, or do it but silently. All of this is making them very uncomfortable and it's just direspectful to assume things like that. We just got them back, don't make Jenna delete Instagram again and make Emma disappear from it once again.

This just needed to be said. Just be respectful, it's not that fucking hard, goddamit. And when I mean respectful, I mean towards the fans AND the actors. Don't make Wednesday cringe again. Stop being kids and attacking other fans for absolutely no reason because you can't accept the fact that they don't ship your ship. And stop using the fucking Wenclair hashtag to say trash about them, this is getting annoying.

This is also addressed to, like me, Wenclair shippers. You should respect Wyler and Wavier shippers as well; don't give the bad example. Everyone is free to ship the characters they want, and this without any drama or violence. Just be kind to each others, it's not that hard.

Thank you for reading this. If you disagree, then just shut the fuck up because I don't have time to lose arguing with immature people on social media. I'm writing this as a reminder to respect Jenna and Emma and the fans, that's all. Y'all seriously needed a reminder.

Also, don't make Tumblr toxic. I already left Instagram and Twitter because people in here are the most toxic ever, I always loved Tumblr because people were nice, but for a week mad Wavier shippers started posting and insulting which is extremely annoying. Oh, and I also had to turn off my anonymous asks because I got very weird questions from probably bots. Don't make this app bad too, it's basically the only good one left with Pinterest.

I suppose that's all. Goodnight. And don't fucking come at me for saying this, because everything I said in here is true and I am just trying to remind people to be nice, not cause any more drama. If you say something mean here, you will be blocked immediately because, as I said, I don't have time to lose arguing with kids who can't respect an opinion.

Goodnight 🤍☮️

[dungeons-and-dragon-age]

ok sorry i'm just. ????

rant and spoilers ahead because i gotta yell into the void a little

first of and most of all. WHY does it sound like Solas front and center of everthing now??? Including both Inky's and Rook's stories/motivations???? Like okay i understand that Solas will inevitably be important in Rook's story and that's chill! We knew he was gonna play a part in this story! But why do they make it sound like half or Rook's purpose is just there to further Solas's story/character

and it quickly becomes clear that Rook will have their own unique relationship with Solas, as the Inquisitor did before them. I think what's been fun for us, too, is trying to build Rook as kind of almost a mirror of Solas.

Epler also acknowledges that the Inquisitor “obviously has a very personal relationship with Solas,” one that will need to be reckoned with in The Veilguard.

“And I'd say the Inquisitor, to some degree, feels guilty or responsible for what Solas is doing to the world. So while we're not going to get too far into details about what role they may play, they absolutely are somebody who is going to be interested and invested in the outcome of Rook's journey in The Veilguard.”

Why. are you telling us how our Inquisitor is supposed to feel about this?? When you play DAI you agree to play The Inquisitor, yes, but you don't agree to play someone who Cares About Solas. Like. Yes. I get that he is important. That much has been clear since Trespasser. And i'm ok with that! But how come you say "this is a game about Thedas and a world in conflict" and then also talk like this story is About Solas, Actually.

The other thing i absolutely do not get and do not like. At All

Those decisions are: who your Inquisitor romanced (with the options gender- and lineage-locked in the same way that they were in Inquisition), whether or not you disbanded the Inquisition, and whether you vowed to stop Solas or save him.

?????

No "who drank from the WoS"? No "who is Divine"? No "does OGB Kieran exist"? No "is Hawke alive" (Varric is there. SURELY he cares about this a lot)? No "what happened to the Mages & Templars"? No "were Wardens banned from the south"? Arent't those uh. Really Relevant Decisions???? WHY is one of the whole grand three (3) decisions that carry over if Inky wants to save Solas or not. I mean ok i guess i get it cus that was The Big Decision TM at the end of Trespasser but again. Why is that the big thing that matters. out of all the things that SHOULD matter.

There's not as many decisions you have made up to this point that have an impact on what's happening in Northern Thedas.

But it’s also part of the advantage of moving the setting up to Northern Thedas, Epler says, with the prior games in the series taking place in Southern Thedas, a significantly different region both geographically and sociopolitically.

Uh. Yeah they do. See above points and also some that i forgot probably. Northern and Southern Thedas don't operate independently from one another that's not how this works. Especially again with things like the WoS or the Divine decision. Also half our companions from the other games are from the north?? Like yes ok i know get what you mean kinda and it's true to an extent but not like this

for one, the team focused on choices that they felt they could react to meaningfully – not just a cameo or one-liner.

“There's never a sense of, ‘Oh, that decision doesn't exist.’ But maybe we don't touch on it in this particular title,”

The. Cameos and one-liners are what make it special though?? You can't say "We want those stories to be personal." and then say you're not making any of those small decisions matter. And i don't mean matter as in having A Big Impact TM but i know that a lot of us LIVE for those small tiny nods to previous decisions that make the world feel actually alive and connected. I understand that we can't have full on-screen cameos or questlines or whatever for every little tidbit but not even. idk. Background convos about what's going on in Orzammar? Gossip about Ferelden's monarch? A line from Varric about Bartrand? Dunno man. Again not to mention the Big Things like Kieran. or the Well of Sorrows consequences. Or the Divine (which. yknow. is directly relevant everywhere except maybe Tevinter??). Those were always the things that made importing a worldstate so charming! because you could see the small little impacts that you have on the world. The tiny things like the line about the pigeons in Ferelden in DA2 or a wartable mission with Wade and Herren in DAI are so so special to me

[lovemyromance]

your posts are literally the elriel bible, I don't think i've disagreed with a single one.

In general, elriels agree on a lot of things which is why it's so odd to find EL/GAs fighting with themselves over "elriels say elains gonna be a warrior" and "elriels say elain's gonna save illyria" because I have never EVER seen a single elriel say such a thing. I saw a long post from some elucien about how elriels self-insert and then they listed a long list of things about what canon elain is - except i don't think elriels would even disagree with what they were saying?

It got kind of muddy when they started trying to claim that "canonically azriel only lusts after elain" but whatever - you get the point. Why are they putting words in our mouths?

Thank you :) I know I always excessively post about elriel (because I'm pretty sure I have the attention span of a squirrel), but some days these petty arguments really make my eye twitch.

Idk why antis seem to think Elriels want Elain to be some warrior, savior of Illyria, High Queen type character. I thought we've all been pretty vocal in wanting to keep her femininity and her kindness and finding strength in her compassion.

If it's because the fanarts....well I think we've all established that nobody is really claiming fanarts to be canon. I think that goes without saying when we have fanart of an Elriel family with Illyrian offspring - or when Eluciens have fanart of Elain looking happy around Lucien lmao. Both are not canon. Who cares - it's fanart? It's not like we really going to pretend that all their fanart is canon either?

Because canonically - Elain can't stand Lucien. Canonically, Azriel has literally never touched Gwyn.

There are basic traits to these characters that nobody can deny. But the antis always have a way of adding additional, personal bias into things. They say Elain's not a warrior - cool, that's true, that's canon – but then they take it a step too far and try to claim its canon that she abhors all violence and she would never touch a dagger and she would hate Azriel because he's a warrior.

Canonically, Elain killed the fucking King of Hybern. She might not crave violence (oh- also what an odd thing to claim - that ANY character loves violence, btw), but she has already proven to be violent when needed.

Canonically, Elain does use a dagger. Not just any dagger - Truthteller.

Nobody's saying she out here training as a Valkyrie at the HOW - but she's not just sitting here in frolicking in a meadow while the rest of her friends and family go to war. She was literally taken AWAY from the main battle in ACOWAR and she still showed back up to pull the most badass move in the books, saving everyone.

Idk what about that is so hard to understand. No Elriel has said she's gonna save Illyria (lol), no one has claimed she's going to be Enalius the Second, nobody is out here waiting for her to take part in the BR and also become a Carthyian.

Elriels like Elain as she is. And even though she's not a warrior, even though she doesn't enjoy violence, even though she isn't a Cartyhian – Azriel still adores her. Azriel still wants her enough to question his religion. That's literally in the books. I can give you the exact page number and quote. I don't need to do any "extra analysis"

You want to talk about canon? Let's talk about how Elain is so perfect that she has even the most brooding warrior falling for her. Let's talk about how Azriel was willing to fight in a blood duel for her. Let's talk about how she was so ready to have a tryst with the Spymaster under everyone's watchful eyes.

We don't need to change anything about Elain, certainly not to have her end up with Azriel. Elriel having feelings for each other is already canon. Elriels did not have to change a single thing about them for them to find each other. That was SJM, so take it up with her.

I mean - she kind of ate when she summed up their relationship in ACOWAR with that scene in the garden...they might not make sense on paper but there's something poetic about them

[that-girl-glader]

JWCT SPOILERS FROM THE TRAILER BELOW

BRO WTH OMGOSH. SO FAR THIS ARE THE THINGS GOING ON IN MY HEAD FROM THAT TRAILER

FIRST OFF...... OMGOSH WHY DOES EVERYONE LOOK SO HOT. AND WHY IS BEN SO BEAUTIFULLY BLONDE AND PRETTY BOY😭😭 DARIUS IS KILLING ME WITH HIS STANCE IN THE BOAT. THE FU???

Okay now for business. "I'm not the same Brooklyn you knew before" Bitch no you FUCKING AREN'T. BECAUSE YOU HAVE GROWN UP. AND have trauma. But babes....what do you mean by that???? Brother. You're gonna get yourself ACTUALLY killed. Why did you burn the photo....there was no reason. ALSO LOVE THE HAIR WTH.

I think the other girl in the trailer we didn't see is either Mae or you know BEN PINCUS' GIRLFRIEND. AND IF IT IS.... I'M SO OVER MY LIFE. BUT THE GAYS CAN'T WIN. AND....I have the sneaking suspicion that benrius (yay) or Benji(bluh ew ew burns...jokesssss) is never gonna happen. I hope he breaks up with her if that ends up true.

I will sue if Brooklyn and Darius end up together. And no it's not because I want Darius and Ben or whatever. Heck they can all stay single except for yasammy for all I care. I just don't see it. It does not compliment each other in any way, and doesn't make sense to me. And I'm a hugeeee Kenji x Brooklyn because it was a very fair balance of differences and similarities. And it was so requited. I just don't see why if you can see she wasn't committed to being with Kenji that she'd be committed to be with Darius. I think she just can't immediately jump into a relationship.

Darius just had his first love it doesn't make sense for him to get with someone. The field of romance is unfamiliar to him. I think he needs to heal first too. They both do. Before anything happens. But guys...it would mean so much to me if benrius in a future skip ends up together because I NEED THIS WTH...And their dynamic just makes me so happy I can't lose that. I'd be borderline sad. Even if the bond was queer platonic. I'd take it. Even if they never kiss or hug or whatever I'd take it. Even if nothing happens with brooks or Ben I'd take it!!! Better non canon than canon am I right. Pull a gustholomule so I can stay delusional.

If anything and I mean ANYTHING HAPPENS TO YASAMMY IM THROWING ROCKS. NO ONE IS DYING THEY ARE LITERALLY IMMORTAL. IT CAN'T JUST BE THE WHITE CHARACTERS WHO CHEAT DEATH.

WTF did Ben keep it a secret that Brooklyns alive?? Delusional version: He doesn't want his chances with Darius to blow....ahahahaha. Real version: He doesn't want his friends to be upset with how much Brook has changed. Or their grief to be invalidated. Or for them to give her a chance when she has changed so much in a very not moral way. Welp. Maybe he just feels like Brook kept it a secret for a reason, and I might as well not call her out. Anywho you guys help me too. I'm insane.

Bye guys. Stay prehistoric!!!!💚🤎🦕

[boowritess]

i love love love the headcanon of the 141 not having kids and babies and ewey.

i think that john price is still very relevant to that. kinda. i don't really seeing him having a pet honestly. unless you wanted one... sure... but nah y'know... he's old tired af. maybe a cat. probably definitely a cat.

but it's been you and john for as long as you can remember.

happy to be in each other's presence from morning to night, or simply just exist in a shared life that means you two don't have to always be around each other.

you could be shopping and he could be sleeping. he's outside tending to the stuff he had supposed to finish before he left deployment while you're reading on the couch inside. he's on a long deployment again, and you're at work.

plus the prospect of kids just never seemed to work into the schedule. "nah," john says to one of your friends, "can handle kids fine, but when i'm home, this old mans bones are good for sleep and not much else. i mean the breeding kink can get me goi-" john grunts when you elbow into his side.

"crude." you huff with an eyeroll.

"but true." he says into his beer as he takes a sip, eyes sparking with mischief.

your friend turns to you. "but doesn't it get lonely?" they asks. "wouldn't you want a little one running around?"

and well sometimes the days may be lonely for you when he's gone...

but that's become impossibly hard to focus on when your phone is being constantly blown up - not by price though. by the 141.

it's never really anything outrages or civil conversation. it's gaz asking which tie he should wear at an event because price said the black one but gaz doesn't really like the black one. then it's johnny sending you a video of him besting his previous time on a training course. though it doesn't stop there. ghost is messaging late nights for him but mid-day for you, asking about how to deal with insomnia. ghost is asking you because he knows you're awake and the others are asleep, he doesn't want to bother them.

you answer every single one, with so much care and attentiveness. you save every picture, every video and boost about their achievements to other people as if they were your own. however, people always assume you're talking about little kids not grown ass men.

yet on days when you're at home or you've come home from work. you're hardly surprised to find one of them had invited themselves into yours and johns home as if it was their own.

sometimes it's gaz crashed out on the couch who's in a desperate need of a shower but definitely needs sleep more.

or the sounds of soap in your fridge, raking around to find something to eat. "lass, ye out of cheese-" he ate the cheese. the whole newly bought block of it.

gaz and soap like to hover around you when they're home. whereas ghost helps price around the house.

but when it's just you and ghost, the oldest boy. it's quiet. there's no forced conversations but probably a few shitty jokes. it's you or him making food and the other doing the dishes. yet ghost opens up and the conversations turn into some of the most randomist, boyish, silly conversations.

when everyone's at home, it can actually be pretty hectic. so you go do the grocery shopping, but you take ghost along cause he's a little like you in regard for a need of quiet time.

oh and can't forget the days you go out by yourself only to come home with a few other things. socks for john - socks for all of them. you bought johnny a new pair of jeans and gaz a couple of shirts. and simon some more sweaters.

christmas, easter, new years - every single holiday is always hosted at yours and price. where everyone comes. farah, alex, laswell and her wife. rudy and alejandro making their way- then of course your boys...

and it's there where you've kinda realized.

you and john do have kids.

just in the form of grown men.

which both you and john don't seem to mind.

you end up shrugging your shoulders as you look at your friend, "honestly i have my hands full when they're all home. so... i'm good." you say with a hum, sipping from your own drink with a small smile as john just chuckles softly.

a/n: realized I never posted this. oh well. the no baby saga continues with john price. drink water be well ya'll xx

[lyushaart]

My SCP doctors headcanons (Bright , Clef , Kondraki , Glass )

Warnings: bad writting (I'm FrEnCh) , mention of declining mental health , me calling Clef a bastard (IT'S TRUE)

Dr Jack Bright

-I don't have a lot of headcanons about him

-He loves pokemon GO

-Whenever he changes body/host , he need at least 2 days to change the body's appearance to match his own before he died for the first time UNLESS he don't want to change it

-Because of that , he had to live few days with women's bodies , so he experienced periods

-From this day , he always keep pads and painkillers in office for him or his co-workers

-I have this headcanon that sometimes , his necklace drive him mad for some reason , he just snapp

-For thoses who say he is not a redhead....WHAT ? Same for thoses who say that he is not Brittish , This man clearly say "woter"

Dr Alto Clef

-Ah , this bastard

-Mean to everyone , but he is a good father for his daughter

-Like , he will often visit her in her cell and bring her things (even if the O5 didn't approved)

-The other scientist can't believe how kind he is to his daughter while he is the litteral spawn of Satan normaly

-He is WAY shorter than his daughter

-I saw someone mention that his third eye could move all over his body , and i like that

-Most of the time , the eye will be on the bridge of his nose or under his right eye

-he can have more eyes when he is mad

-Call every SINGLE scientist who are younger than him (even if it's just a few months) 'kiddo'

-Man always say ALOHA

Dr Benjamin Kondraki

-Well , this man is an introvert

-But he is cool

-An amazing father , too, when Draven was younger , they would both go outside and take pictures

-He want the best for his son

-doesn't know what the word 'fear' means

-I MEAN , if he did , he wouldn't just ride SCP-682 like it was some kind of horse !

-Loves taking pictures of butterflies

Dr Simon Glass

-THE ULTIMATE CINNAMON ROLL

-He always try to make his co-workers feel better

-REALLY concerned about Dr Bright's mental health

-He is kind , but he is not the one to let himself bossed around

-Keep biscuits in his office for therapy time

-He try no to show it , but hearing all thoses traumas from his co-workers affect his own mental health

-He would like to vent but he won't let himself

Pfew that's done , I want to ask you guys if you would be interessed by more SCP related stuffs AND if you would want to hear about my SCP scientist OC

Oh , i'll take request too

[adolfusraptor1985]

My Opinion on Physical Shifters

Honestly, I don't get why this subject rubs people the wrong way. Because I want people who follow, or even interact with my blog, to know where my general opinions stand, I feel the need to express how I feel on this matter in particular.

Long story short, I support physical shifters.

Listen. Physical shifters have the right to express their identity and experiences just as much as any other being. There are two major misconceptions/opinions that run rampant through the non/alterhuman and therian community. One being that all physical shifters are delusional, and the other being that all delusions should be "fixed". Both of these statements are (I feel) incredibly wrong and harmful to innocent beings.

First of all, I want to state that I do not believe all physical shifters to be suffering from delusions. Nonhumanity as a whole is such a nuanced and complex identity that we simply do not understand it well enough to put clinical labels on it. I've also seen physical shifters describe their experiences more similarly to that of how many physical nonhuman identities work. A "physical shift" could happen on a level not visible to other people. There could be a veil that covers a being's true form, making them appear human when they are not. People also experience reality differently than others. Just because something seems like a delusion to other's doesn't mean that it's not that person's reality.

Secondly, I don't believe that all delusions need to be fixed. In the vast majority of physical shifters I've seen, their delusions to not cause any major impairments on daily life. Sure, physical shifters will often express the hardships of their experiences, but hardships aren't the same as impairments. Plenty of physical shifts learn on their own how to properly manage and cope with their delusions while living a fulfilling life. These types of delusions are not something that needs to be "fixed".

As a bit of a closing, I want to throw in how I actually relate to physical shifters as a physical nonhuman. I believe fully in the idea that my human body is basically an illusion and that I'm the only one who can see my true physical form. Sometimes, this form feels very nonhuman and stands out to me. Other times, it's faded, and my nonhuman identity doesn't feel as physical. I consider myself a werefox, as I feel like my physical form (the one others can't see) shifts from more to less nonhuman. I'm fully aware that others may view this as a delusion, but I still believe it because it's how I experience my own reality. So, in a bit of a roundabout way, I'm honestly questioning if I could apply the term physical shifter to myself.

[according2thelore]

Thanks Lizzy for the ask!

Here is a Late wincest Weds ask from me!

What is one scene or conversation Sam and Dean had that was especially wincest flavored that you want to rewrite to make it be EXPLICITLY wincest instead of weirdcest?

Muah! Ty again!

- Cassi

hi, cassi!! happy wincest wednesday!

thank YOU so much for the ask!!!

AGH! this one is so hard! my immediate reach for this one is of course the church scene. nothing like gently bandaging wounds/handfasting in a church while proclaiming your love:

DEAN: [...] But I can't do it without you. SAM: You can barely do it with me. I mean, you think I screw up everything I try. You think I need a chaperone, remember? DEAN: Come on, man. That's not what I meant. SAM: No, it's exactly what you meant. You want to know what I confessed in there? What my greatest sin was? It was how many times I let you down. I can't do that again. DEAN: Sam -- SAM: [beginning to cry] What happens when you've decided I can't be trusted again? I mean, who are you gonna turn to next time instead of me? Another angel, another -- another vampire? Do you have any idea what it feels like to watch your brother just – DEAN: Hold on, hold on! You seriously think that? Because none of it -- none of it -- is true. Listen, man, I know we've had our disagreements, okay? Hell, I know I've said some junk that set you back on your heels. But, Sammy...come on. I killed Benny to save you. I'm willing to let this bastard and all the sons of bitches that killed mom walk because of you. Don't you dare think that there is anything, past or present, that I would put in front of you! It has never been like that, ever! I need you to see that. I'm begging you. SAM: How do I stop? [SAM squeezes his hand as blood drips out onto the floor the orange glow is a little brighter but then starts to fade.] DEAN: Just let it go. SAM: I can't. It's in me, Dean. You don't know what this feels like. [DEAN wraps a bandanna around Sam’s cut.] DEAN: Hey, listen, we will figure it out, okay, just like we always do. Come on. [DEAN grabs SAM and pulls him in for a tight hug.] DEAN: Come on. Let it go, okay? Let it go, brother.

i needed sam to make his jealousy over benny more overt, and i would probably rewrite it to make it even more codependent and offputting if that's possible.

my mind also goes to dean's final monologue in s15e20, but...like...that's already borderline textual. it could stand to have just a touch more wincest:

SAM: P-Please. DEAN: I'm fading pretty...I'm fading pretty quick, so... there's a few things that I need you to hear. Come here. (Sam moves closer and Dean puts his hand on the side of Sam's neck) Let me look at you. Yeah, there he is. I'm so proud of you, Sam (Dean's hand is on Sam's shoulder and Sam is holding onto Dean wrist) DEAN: You know that? I've always looked up to you. (Sam is getting emotional, trying not to cry) Man, when we were kids, you were so damn smar... smart. You never...You never took any of dad's crap. I never knew how you did that. And you're stronger than me. You always have been. Hey, did I ever tell you... Did I ever tell you that night that, uh... that I ca... That I came for you when you were at school? You know, when dad hadn't come back from his hunting trip? SAM: Yeah, um.. Uh, the Woman in White. DEAN: The Woman in White. That's right. I must have stood outside your dorm for hours... because I didn't... I didn't know what... What you would say. (Sam is visibly crying) I thought you'd tell me to... to get lost or get dead. And I don't know what I would've done... if I didn't have you. 'Cause I was so scared. I was scared, 'cause when it all came down to it, it was always you and me. It's always been you... and me. SAM (crying): Then don't leave me. Don't leave me. I can't do this alone. DEAN: Yes, you can. SAM: Well, I don't want to. DEAN: Hey. I'm not leaving you. I'm gonna be with you... (Dean is crying as he places his fist over Sam's heart) Right here... every day. Every day you're out there and you're Li... And you're living and you're fighting, 'cause you...You always keep fighting. You hear me? I'll be there every step. I love you so much. My baby brother.

like...c'mon.

i also think i would rewrite dean in croatoan to say "you know what it's about" with his patent sam-smitten-eyes, before he gets cut off:

SAM: Dean, don't do this. Just get the hell out of here. DEAN: No way. SAM: Give me my gun, and leave. DEAN: For the last time, Sam. No. SAM: (slamming the table) This is the dumbest thing you've ever done. DEAN: Oh, I don't know about that. Remember that waitress in Tampa? (shudders) SAM: Dean, I'm sick. It's over for me. It doesn't have to be for you. DEAN: No? SAM: No, you can keep going. DEAN: Who says I want to? SAM: What? DEAN crosses to the other wall and pulls a handgun out of his waistband before sitting on the file cabinet. DEAN: I'm tired, Sam. I'm tired of this job, this life . . . this weight on my shoulders, man. I'm tired of it. SAM: So what, so you're just going to give up? You're just gonna lay down and die? Look, Dean, I know this stuff with Dad has — DEAN: You're wrong. It's not about Dad. I mean, part of it is, sure, but . . . SAM: What is it about? [my addition] DEAN: You know what it's about-- (They hear a noise outside.)

small one, and not "romantic," but definitely wincest, i think it would have been lovely if they changed s4e21 from

DEAN: No. I'm not giving him demon blood. I won't do it. BOBBY: And if he dies? DEAN: Then at least he dies human!

to:

DEAN: Then at least he dies mine!

because i think a lot of the ruby/dean conflict is about control, about who owns sam, and over who has guardianship over sam's decisions. plus, i think it reflects a lot of dean's control issues he has this season.

another small thing that could've been a joke, is during "mystery spot," sam should've tried kissing dean to see if that changed anything. dean could die immediately after, and it could've been played as a gag. i'm actually shocked he didn't try to kiss him. if it works, it works, right?

but i think my final choice has to be not a specific line of dialogue, but a scene. my ultimate choice for tweaking is the final montage in s15.

i'm talking domestic!chesters. i think it's perfect that they end up basically married in the bunker, and i would've loved to see just little hints that it's more than meets the eye. "dean's" room has the other side of the bed perfectly made. sam's jacket hangs on the other chair. dean reaches for someone on the other side of the bed before he realizes they're already up. later, dean rests a casual hand on sam's hip when he passes him in the kitchen.

at the pie festival, someone makes a comment that they're such a cute couple, and sam demurs but dean just winks. sam wipes the whipped cream off of dean's nose and puts his finger in his own mouth. dean kisses him and now they've both got shit on their face.

one of the witnesses flirts with sam and dean makes a weird face. sam steps closer to him and smiles awkwardly.

(and maybe at the very end of dean's death, a kiss he has to gasp his way through because he can barely breathe at this point.)

i just LOVE domestic!chesters. 🥺 and would have loved to see them living their domestic bliss.

thank you so much for this ask, cassi! i am so sorry it's 37 miles long, lol! this was such a fun ask! happy wincest wednesday! <3

-lizzy

[marshmallowprotection]

Have you ever done a post talking about how Ray stopped obsessing about MC on his own route?

I don't believe I've ever done one in depth before but I would LOVE to talk about that to clear up misconceptions. So, we're all well-aware of the fact Ray is completely in love with the idea of you. To talk about it in depth, we need to start at the beginning of Ray's awakening. While talking about his infatuation, it's important to understand the reason why he became so captivated with you in the first place, so that you'll be able to see how his love changes from mere infatuation with some idea to the conceptualizing of true love.

I'll start at the very beginning of Ray's identity in Mint Eye. When he realized who he was and what he had to do for the Savior, this person who has forced him to undergo torture the likes of which we only see brief spurts of and cannot even conceptualize just how horrible it was for him to experience, he understood the rules. He had to obey every order to survive, even if it made him feel sick to his stomach.

Any sort of deviation from the Savior's expectation would have him back into a basement that held nothing but nightmares.

"I have no one left for me. I have been abandoned by everyone but the Savior. I should be grateful that she hasn't given up on me like everybody I've ever known. I should devote my life to hers because that's all I'm good for. If I was good for anything, V and Saeyoung... wouldn't have left me behind. I see nothing but torment in my life, but that's all I've ever known and that's all I will ever know. I need to be grateful that the Savior saved me, because her torment is what can save me... if I can be good enough for her... maybe I'll be good enough to exist."

You have to understand that this is Ray's core foundation. He has been pressured to believe something that goes against who he is. Ray is described best as someone who cannot stop dreaming, and Suit Saeran said it the best, "Ray won't stop dreaming of a day that might bring V and Saeyoung back to his side, even if Rika's forced us to believe they'll hurt us. Unlike Ray, I know we can't go back to what we had, but he won't stop dreaming. If he stops dreaming, we won't have any hope. To dream is to have hope, and Ray is my hope. That's why I want to help him and you escape this place. So, our hope can... survive."

Ray's very existence is defined by his value to Rika. That's what he's been forced to believe and trust me when I say this, Ray doesn't want that. He doesn't want to be defined by what he can do for Rika to give her proof that he shouldn't be tortured anymore. He wants to be able to exist without the fear of a hammer swinging over his head, but he isn't allowed to have that. Rika's controlling him through fear, through the idea that he has to show her he has value so she won't throw him away like "V and Saeyoung threw him away".

She abuses Ray with a blend of verbal abuse and love-bombing on the regular and this back and forth of "you're an airhead and maybe Ray shouldn't exist in the first place because he keeps failing every task I give him," vs "Oh, Ray, no one in this world will care for you the way you need except for me... I didn't abandon you, so you can truly believe me above everyone else."

How would you feel if the only way you could evade being drugged in Mint Eye's basement would be to work your fingers to the bone?

Would you fight the Savior? Would you try to reason with her even though it is futile to argue with someone who refuses to listen to you? Would it take long for you to realize that the only means to your survival will be to obey? What if you fought her and she cast you aside, sending you to fight for yourself on the streets of Seoul? The very streets where one wrong move could have Saejoong Choi kill you?

What's worse, to be tormented in a basement with drugs until you learn your "lesson", or to be killed the minute you step foot into the outside world your Mother always told you would kill you when you did? You don't want to die. You don't want to die, do you? How long will it take before you accept this awful reality... because you don't have another choice? It didn't take Ray very long to accept that he had no other choice. It was Rika's torment and "salvation" or death.

He understands that he'll probably die in Mint Eye, but at least... in Mint Eye, he can tell himself that Rika didn't abandon him. At least, he would die knowing one person didn't "give up" on him. He settles, because what else can he do but settle? This is the greatest good he may ever get. Is it any wonder why he wants to make the "best" of the nightmare he's living in? No, it's really not.

It's not okay, though. He shouldn't have to make the "best" of what he's given because he doesn't deserve any of the suffering he's been forced to experience at the hand of Rika. None of the believers who found themselves trapped in that place deserved what happened to them. What Ray suffered doesn't justify his decision making, though. His suffering doesn't make what he does with the player before he's able to realize the error of his ways right.

Mind you, as I'm writing this post and explaining Ray's perspective, I don't want any of you to get this twisted. Ray's actions aren't justified in any way. He shouldn't have lied to the player, he shouldn't have told you the RFA were characters in a game, he shouldn't have risked your life and safety for his obsession with the idea of you, etc, etc. I know a lot of people are more understanding of Ray and Saeran than they are of other characters in this game, but I'm still going to say this since it has to be said so often.

Understanding a character, enjoying a character, and knowing the rhyme or reason why they do something doesn't mean you justify their actions. It just means you like that character and tried to get more information to understand why they did what they did and it's okay to morally dubious characters. Let's break down our important critical thinking skills and remember that.

Anyway.

Those images I stitched above are from his diary and show you a tiny glimpse into his formula for bringing someone to Mint Eye.

Ray starts out as the head of security for Mint Eye and he has to work his way up to the creation process that brings us to the RFA "game" he sells the player. He spends the first few months stalking the RFA as best he can to learn more about their habits and how to either eliminate them or bring them to Mint Eye for the Savior, it's only after he has proven himself worthy of gathering information that Rika tells him that he will be allowed to choose whoever he wants to help him take down the RFA.

This is a "reward" he's given for good behavior, as in, doing his job until his fingers bleed and he has to wear gloves to stop himself from dislocating the joints, chugging caffeine pills and his elixir like a "good boy", and keeping his mouth shut about anything but breathing and Paradise. He gets the "honor" of finding someone to help him do his job, and during the process of hunting down that person to help his mission, he finds... you.

I don't think he set out to find someone who could like him. I think he originally sought out someone who could listen to him and believe his lies about the RFA. He wanted someone who wouldn't question him... after all, how can you get someone to be your eyes and ears when all you hear is: "Why is this so life-like? Why do these characters feel so real? I'm starting to believe what they're telling me and I'm having so much doubt what you've been selling me, Ray."

He was looking for a person who would be incredibly naive, but kind-hearted. It's just that in the process of trying to find someone to fit that bill, he discovered you. It's not entirely clear how he found you or what made him like you, that's always left open to the player so they can decide what he liked about them. All we know is that he watched you visit your favorite cafe now and again. Everything else is really up to the player to decide... meaning however dark or light you want that imagery is up to you.

Regardless, he discovered you, and something about you captivated him so much that he told himself there could be no other person to test his game. It would have to be you. There was something about you that made him feel warm and fuzzy inside... it made him feel so good. Here's the thing about his feelings for you in the beginning. He could learn as much as he wanted by scouring information about you online, but that would never be the same as actually getting to know you.

So, from the get-go, Ray's foundation of who you are is based on what he can find.

Everything he can't find is built on what he creates in his head.

This is why he becomes obsessed with the idea of you, and it's so easy for him to slip into this fantasy. The idea of someone can be better than who they really are sometimes, because a concept can't disappoint you or break your heart. Ray spends most of his time fantasizing about what it would be like to be close to you, what it would be like to get to know you, and as he continues to fill in the pieces with his fantasized version of you, the line between reality and fiction becomes blurred. 

You become the only constant in his life that has a driving force for good, frankly. Whenever he is being tortured for a mistake he made or criticized for not being good enough, he slips into his head to just fantasize about what it would be like to be treated with respect by the object of his obsession. The concept of you, it comforts him, it brings him peace, it brings him joy, and it keeps him ALIVE. If not for those months he spent dreaming of you, he might not have survived as long as he did.

Ray, at his core, needs a reason to have hope.

If you strip away all of his hopes and dreams, there is nothing left but a shell. There is nothing left but a husk... and is it really any wonder in this world why Suit Saeran was angry when he woke up and saw his Ray was tortured for daring to dream the impossible?

When that was all Ray ever wanted? To dream? He wouldn't even allow himself a chance to ask for what he wanted, he would beat it out himself to let the Savior know he wouldn't try to fight her for ANYTHING.

Ray was trained to destroy himself from the inside out because Rika intended for him to disappear someday. For Saeran to "take over and prove that strength is only born from survival of the fittest."

The fantasy of you wasn't the real you by any means but Ray could settle for a fantasy if he couldn't taste reality.

The idea of you gave him strength to survive until tomorrow, and that's important to understand. Why else would Ray consistently say, "I will settle for whatever you give me. I don't deserve anything. Use me as you please, even if it hurts me, because I just want you to be happy."? Ray has to settle for less all the time. He is so desperate to be liked, to never be abandoned again, that he's okay with you doing anything to him as long as he can stay with you.

That's what Bad Ending 1 is all about—if you decide to take his offer to hurt him for your amusement.

When all he can dream of is his fantasy and what he settled for, it should become abundantly clear to players why he is so dead set on wanting you to stay with him. His desperation for you to stay with him stems from the fact that he doesn't want to be abandoned. Ray believes he was left behind by everyone who loved him except for his Savior, so when he begs and pleads for you to stay later on, it's 100% because of this fear.

Is it wrong for him to beg and plead to make you stay with him? YES! It's not okay! But, it's easy to understand WHY he's begging so hard in the first place. Ray wants so badly for his fantasy of you to be real. To be liked by you, not even loved, is all he wants because you have become the only thing that makes a smile stay on his face in this den of torment.

Do you know what you do as the player during Ray Route? During your time with Ray, you are constantly and consistently telling him that he should value himself, that he shouldn't beat himself down, that he shouldn't take Rika's torment and believe the horrible things she tells him, and that he should think for himself instead of what he thinks Rika wants him to think. You are actively working to help Ray understand his value as a person, nudging him to decide for himself what he wants.

Do you owe him that kindness? No, no you don't. You don't owe him this, nobody does, but if you decide to love him and give him the time to grow from his mistakes, this is where Ray Route takes you. Tumblr won't let me post more than 30 images, so I will point you to read just a couple of specific chatrooms I can't post snippets of.

Day 5, 19:23, "Small Coincidence" & Day 6, 03:17, "If I was stronger" & Day 6, 20:49, "Suddenly Afraid". Those chatrooms specifically give a player the option to reassure Ray at every turn, to tell him that he is a person who matters to you, and that he needs to trust your words as you say them, and not assume they come with a stipulation like every word out of Rika's mouth.

You're not telling Ray that you want to stay in Mint Eye with these choices.

You're telling him that you want to stay with him.

MC is actively making the decision once they realize the truth to see what they can do to get Ray out of Mint Eye. You may not trust V at first, you may not even believe him, but you have seen Ray suffer at Rika's hand and you know he doesn't deserve that. You want to get him away from this place, far, far away... and the closer you get to the kiss visual novel, the closer you get to helping Ray overcome what was done to him.

I understand it can be difficult to grasp what's happening during the first two days of the route because realistically this would be playing out throughout a couple of months. But, what you're doing is helping Ray undo the brainwashing. You are working to deprogram the cult manipulation, and I don't know if any of you know how hard it is for someone to do that in real life, but it's not easy.

There is a reason why it is so difficult to remove someone from a cult once they are knee-deep in the trenches. You can't just tell someone to leave, even if it's detrimental to their health and safety because they won't leave the cult. Cults are designed to keep people inside. Even if you present someone with logic and reason, they have been taught not to listen to anyone who tries to tell them anything that goes against the doctrine they have been forced to believe. 

You are more likely to lose a person if you try to force them out of a cult than you are to save them. Obviously, every situation is different and you need to approach this with care if you encounter something like this in real life, but I would pray nobody would have to learn about this information or how to use it.

I don't want anyone to be trapped in a cult. But, hey, look into how folks do help remove people from cults with SAFETY in mind. It's interesting, if a bit dark because there's right and wrong ways to help people.

That's why I advise you to look in those chat rooms if you want more contextual evidence to understand what's happening here since my images are limited and I had to chop this down to what I knew would be most helpful to someone's understanding of the situation. So, I've got two phone calls below that point out what I'm talking about and show what the MC is doing.

Reassuring Ray of his desires by telling him he's allowed to think for himself, and then down below, you're working to tell Ray that he can trust other people, not just the Savior. It is the little things like these choices that build up to what happens when you kiss him and it just about clicks for him that this place isn't sustainable.

This language the player uses is important in those chatrooms and during every phone call where this conversation topic comes up. He needs to hear it. He needs to know that his life is bound by what he can do for Rika. He can have more what he's been given, he doesn't have to settle for torment and torture. He can have whatever he truly desires as long as he's willing to face the facts. Ray's just... so afraid of what will happen when he stands up that it takes a long time to get him to that point.

Case in point, the fake elixir. He became so incredibly paranoid about his decision to have you forgo the elixir that he decided to cultivate a fake bottle that nobody could distinguish from the real thing just to protect you. He lied about you taking the elixir in the first place and that was dangerous in itself, but it was a decision he made that truly began to send him down a path that would lead him to run away from settling for the hell Rika gave him. 

This lie Ray made was huge, and I don't see a lot of people point that out.

He tells you multiple times that he's afraid of what might happen to you if they find out he lied about your initiation ceremony. He knows what's going to happen to you, and he knows what will happen to him because he lied about it. He might never be able to see you again, and he might never exist again after they're through with him, but he still decided to lie about it because he couldn't stand the thought of seeing you in pain.

Decisions like that are ones that help you understand the "generous" organization you're in isn't trying to help you, it's trying to kill you at every corner. Ray’s devotion is based on fear and fear alone. He truly doesn't believe what he's been sold, the only reason why he fights so hard for this paradise is because he believes that he doesn't have any other choice.

Why do you think he wants Paradise to be as good as he can make it? 

When you try to tell him you want to leave, he tells you that he could never survive in the outside world. It has been beaten into him over and over again. He won't be able to survive out there without the help of the savior. He won't be able to survive anywhere without her help.

That's why he tries to fight so hard to survive, to make the best of this nightmare, because one day he'll be able to catch the carrot on the string. Even if he knows that's never going to happen, he doesn't believe there's any other way for him to exist, and if he's going to be happy with you, the only place he can have it is here. Even when you make him want to believe in the impossible dream, it still feels very impossible.

That's by design, Rika's design.

So, when he actively starts to make hard decisions that go against everything she's tried to beat into him, that shows him breaking away from Mint Eye. That is the first step in the process of getting him out of there. It is not easy by any means, but by God were you so close to getting him out of there. Lying to Rika? Huge. Making a fake elixir to protect you? Huge. Owning up to the fact that he's terrified for what he's done by bringing you here? Huge. A process of accountability on his part and the beginning of Ray's journey to do the right thing.

Every conversation you had with Ray up until this point has helped him little by little realize you care about him and it's not something you're going to throw away. Your affection for him isn't something that's going to be yanked away like a carrot on a string, you intend to give him kindness because you believe he deserves it very inherently, meaning that he doesn't have to prove himself to receive it. He is all deserving of love, just as anyone else is, and you want him to know that because seeing him destroy himself is painful.

Even at the moment when you hold him close to your heart and there seems to be nothing in the world that could tell him you didn’t mean what you told him, there’s still some unease in his chest. You can't help somebody overcome years of insecurity and months of torture with a single kiss. But, it's a start, and the decision to start a journey towards self-reflection is what’s hopeful. 

There's still a hint of what he thought was love when you kiss him. It's not hard to miss. But, if you've been paying attention to the way he's been talking, you'll have noticed that the pressure he laid down to stay with him near the beginning of your journey has decreased by a significant margin. He is no longer trying to find ways to manipulate you into staying with him. 

He's trying to find ways to understand your heart and what it means to be close to the real you.

He's less focused on trying to convince you that this place is great, and he starts to reveal what's going on inside his head. He tells you why he’s lost and afraid, he tells you what keeps him awake at night, and he tells you how he’s come to believe this is truly the only place for him to exist.

His desperation is what asks you to stay with him because he wants to be with you if you’ll have him, but he can’t understand why you don’t want to stay in Mint Eye when he's been coerced to believe this is the only place he can exist. It's important to understand the huge difference in language.

But, now as you hold him close to your heart, his fantasy is starting to fade away by the minute. He's less focused on trying to make sense of his dreams and more focused on trying to understand the reality of what you're living in. You know, "If there really is a paradise, I wish you would be there with me." He's not calling Mint Eye a paradise, he said he would want to be in a "paradise" with you.

Little adjustments to his manner of speech stand out. Read between the lines and compare and contrast the way that Ray talks to you at the beginning and more so as you get closer to him. All that work you laid down as you got closer to him mattered so damn much that I can not even begin to explain it in a single sentence. Do you know why it matters so much?

Rika had eyes and ears on Ray. She knew what you were doing, she knew what you were telling Ray, and she knew Ray was on the cusp of leaving her behind. So, what did Rika do when someone told her Ray kissed the Special Missionary? She got rid of him, or she tried to get rid, at least.

She is using him for everything she can get out of him. She intends to use him until he is no longer useful, and your trying to convince him that he has value goes against everything she's been fighting to make him believe. The minute you help him realize that he has more worth than what she's given to him is the minute he decides to leave. Rika can't have him abandon her, she's the only person who can abandon someone, she says. I'm the only one who gets to decide who suffers after V tried to decide everything for me.

The only reason why he is punished is because you were only an inch away from helping him escape Mint Eye. 

You were THAT close.

He manages to call you somewhere amidst the torture because he finds the courage to tell you the truth. He wants to be with you more than anything in the world because he finally realized being with you made him feel like he was worth something, but he isn't allowed to exist in paradise. He was never meant to know what this felt like this, what it felt like to be loved by someone as kind as you to him, and if he doesn't take this torture, you will know this torture. 

"I must be gone for our salvation. I need to be gone for you to stay in paradise."

vs

"No, no! I want to stay! I want to see you so much! Please, I don't want to disappear! I miss you, please... please! Abandon me, save yourself!"

This is Ray trying to fight the programming that was beaten into him, but he ultimately lost his battle in the basement. He was so close to getting out of Mint Eye but Rika knew better than to turn her back on him. She knew she had to snuff out his light if she wanted to use him for what he was worth.

I do not doubt in my heart that he fought as much as he could to survive those hours of suffering and torment, but he was fighting Rika and God knows how many guards as they shoved elixir down his throat and told him he was a failure. I can't blame him for not being able to believe in his dreams when they held a bottle of poison to his throat and told him he needed to obey or you would suffer. 

Your last interaction with Ray as himself is when Saeran shuts down. When you tell Saeran that you won't treat him like Ray to give him the love he deserves, because you know treating Saeran like Ray won't be good or healthy for him. You want to love him as Saeran, not as Ray... and the idea of being loved as himself is torture. He'll die if the Savior finds out you love him (and he, you, in return) because that's literally what happened to Ray.

Pretending to be Ray was his only hope of tasting that adoration for even a moment. Because he understood inherently that love and kindness would always be a weakness in Mint Eye. Showing even a small amount of that weakness would’ve had him destroyed, and if they destroyed him, there would be nothing to protect whatever remained of Ray, and you. If he's gone and incapable of being the sword and shield of "strength", there will be no hope for all three of you.

I digress, I've talked about Suit Saeran’s desire to be loved before, so I don’t think I need to go too depth about that right here. Just know he craves love too, but he won't let himself have it because he's afraid of being tortured like Ray was for unleashing his desires. He wants to be the strongest so nobody tries to torture him ever again, even when it could cost him a chance at happiness.

I.E. Bad Ending 2, where Suit Saeran goes too far and he breaks the player completely beyond repair and he can't put you back together again even though he realizes he shouldn't have done what he did in the first place.

This moment is the one where everything finally comes to a head and Ray looks you in the eyes and confesses the truth. He apologizes to you for everything he's done, for tricking you, for deceiving you, for putting you in this predicament in the first place all because he was so obsessed with the idea of you.

Even if you decided to give him a chance, even if you decided he was worth fighting for, and even if you decided you wanted to be with him despite everything—Ray understood in that moment you deserved an apology because he shouldn't have deceived you in the first place. He acknowledges that he is guilty, not just Saeran.

They both hurt you and there is no excuse for their actions. Ray is able to conceptualize this need to apologize first, and his ability to own up to everything that's happened so far is what opens the door for Saeran to do the same.  

He tells you that you need to put yourself first, that you need to protect yourself and if it comes down to it, if you need to choose between him or yourself, he would want you to choose yourself. After all this time he spent trying to convince you to abandon everything and stay with him in this false paradise, he realizes that you deserve to decide for yourself what it is you want and after everything that's happened, it's your choice and he can't blame you for whatever you choose. 

He can't force you to stay with him. He can't manipulate you to stay with him. He can't get on his hands and knees and tell you not to abandon him just because he's afraid.

If you want to stay with him, it should be because that's something you want, not because it's something he's tried to make you do for him.

He understands that now, and he began to understand that before, it was hard to see it under all the torture and pain he was experiencing before, unfortunately.

You helped him realize that he's always been a person deserving of love and affection, and if it wasn't for this dire situation, if it wasn't for the fact that he knows if he's not careful you'll be tortured within an inch of your life, his words in this moment would be filled with more gratitude at having the chance to have known you. He's unfortunately still beating himself down because he's not sure if there will ever be a way for him to exist in a world that won't try to destroy him. 

But, he wanted you to know, no matter what, you helped him realize he was worth more than what he thought he was. You made him see meaning in what he imagined was NOTHING. Rika never for Ray to be anything but a tool, and you showed him that Ray mattered.

His existence mattered.

It meant something.

He meant something.

Ray: “Ever since I met you, I thought that I might be able to stay in this world. You made my name mean something when it was never meant to mean anything. You're kind, one of the kindest people I've ever met, and I wish... I wish I could stay with you... but I've hurt you so much.”

Suit Saeran, hours later: "You know, the name Ray wasn't supposed to mean something... but you look a little sad every time I say it. I'm certain that's because you made him feel real... made him feel like he was allowed to be something, more than just an airhead who did all the work they forced down his throat."

Ray realizing that true love sometimes means being willing to let someone go because the environment around the two of you is only going to destroy you in the end is huge for someone who thought his love could only be founded in fantasy. A boy who was ready to cling desperately to you and do anything he could to make you stayed by his side willfully choosing to let you go because he never should have tried to cage you in the first place? 

Character growth!

This here is the pivotal moment when you should understand his love for you has become real, and it is not founded in the obsession it was at the get go. I don't know how else to spell this out any clearer for people to understand, but if I missed anything and you're not sure about something you've come across in the game, please point it out because I would love to talk about it. 

I know that this game is not perfect by any means when it comes to showing his character progression, but the concept is there, and as long as you're looking like you will find it readily.