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heesdreamer · 2 years

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give it time

PAIRING ➩ heeseung x reader

SUMMARY ➩ being jakes twin sister, your reputation followed you around wherever you went. add on the fact you were a known man eating playgirl with a thing for nerds and you were heeseung’s worst nightmare

GENRE ➩ playgirl!au x inexperienced!hee

WARNINGS ➩ sexual scenes (no full smut sorry guys) and light slut shaming

WC. ➩ 14.03k

DISCLAIMER ➩ i don’t feel like i got to explore these characters enough so fyi im opened to one shot request or small drabbles for these two! feel free to send an ask if ur interested in a scene

Despite the common perception of you, you were not a complete and total monster.

Sure, the rumors were true in some aspects but in most cases things were warped and twisted as they danced from mouth to mouth and you were left with a bit of a startling reputation.

You leave too many freshman boys crying and suddenly you are the devil disguised in a perfectly polished and manicured body, girlish scents and cheeky smiles being used to lure your victims in to their death.

Frankly you thought this was all way too dramatized. You liked to play around, who didn’t, and it wasn’t your fault you had a very particular taste when it came to your boys. Death was dramatic, if anything their social meters skyrocketed after being seen with you.

“It’s immoral.” Your best friend was currently giving you his opposing opinion. Sunoo was laid across your bed and watching you carefully reapply your lipgloss in the large mirror on your desk. “Maybe even a little bit sick.”

You laughed at him, turning to face him fully and strike a pose. He gave a thumbs up at your outfit and smiled at you despite his scoldings.

Sunoo had been your friend for as long as you’d known what the word meant. He was a year younger than you but decades more mature and when you both started to change drastically, you still remained friends.

Most of the version of yourself you showed outside of this room was a carefully poised character, a show of beauty and confidence to ensure you weren’t belittled and were taken seriously in all aspects of life. Yet here, alone with Sunoo as you got ready for another Saturday night party, you were your rawest self.

“I can’t help what I like.” You continued on your conversation now that he’s approved your attire.

And you meant this from the bottom of your soul. You’ve tried to fall for other guys, tried to stare length at the football players and hope it stirred something awake in you and you could fulfill another cliche when it came to high school norms.

Yet it was earlier on in your years of puberty when you discovered your type, and oh god was it a discovery.

Park Sunghoon had stumbled off the summer camp bus behind a few girls you’d recognized from previous years. He was clutching his backpack strap with one hand and pushing his glasses up his nose with the other. To make matters worse (or better, depending on who you’re asking) he had tripped coming down the steps and nearly face planted in the dirt below him.

For the first time in your life, you were completely and utterly inlove. Or at least as inlove a sniffly 14 year old can be.

You’d had your first kiss that summer, hidden behind a bush on the final nights huge campfire and you blushed thinking about how Sunghoon’s hands were shaking and his eyes were wide when you pulled away.

That was the exact thing you’d gotten obsessed with. You never saw Sunghoon again, not at summer camp or anywhere around the city, but you constantly searched for him in other boys. You liked the awkwardness and shy glances and you liked the way you could almost see the corrupted thoughts in their mind after a few weeks with you.

Other people your age gushed over the charmers, the boys at parties who leaned against the wall and asked you to slip away into an uncleaned room. Sunoo sharing the same ideology considering the way he constantly fawned over somebody on the soccer team.

Which is why you didn’t get angry at him for his scolding, for his lack of understanding. It was an art form and not everybody could appreciate it.

“Y/N, kid. I told you I’m not waiting all night for you.” Deafening pounds on your door strictly reminded you of that fact.

You swung open your door with a scowl, ignoring the way Sunoo mumbled about his hatred for the nickname kid, and came face to face with your brother.

Jake was exactly two minutes older than you and spent your entire lives magnifying this fact at any given moment. His eyes scanned your outfits before looking behind you to Sunoo’s and he sighed softly.

“So we are going complete ‘embarrass my big brother’ tonight I guess.” His words caused you to roll your eyes and push on his shoulder so you could move past him out into the hallway.

Jake and you got along great despite your differences, something about the twin connection helping you be a lot closer than you might have been else wise considering everything else about you was completely flipped.

He was the star of your family in all things that truly seemed to matter to your parents, handsome and sociable and not to mention the captain of the football team.

“You’re not my big brother.” You mumbled as you passed him and he smiled at you and messed up your hair. You paused and waited for Sunoo at the top of the stairs, raising an eyebrow at the fact Jake was watching you with a strange expression.

“My friends are downstairs.” He started to explain and you furrowed your brows in confusion. When you’d first become cool enough to hang out with Jake’s friends, he had warned them and you about the consequences of dating each other, but he gradually realized they were absolutely not your type.

You imagined he still had to deal with comments, you were well known at school and undeniably conventionally attractive, plus Park Jay had definitely made numerous passes at you throughout the years.

“I’d rather jump down these stairs than fuck one of your friends Jake.” His mouth curled in disgust at your blunt words and you saw Sunoo laugh as he approached the two of you, closing your bedroom door.

“There’s a new kid on the team and I know how you are.” He was whispering but his tone was stern and you shook your head at him in annoyance.

“I’m not interested in jocks brother, I feel like we’ve been over this. There’s nothing to worry about.”

“The Sim’s! Looking fantastic as usual.” Jay’s voice floating up the stairs caused the three of you to turn in it’s direction and you immediately froze as you took in the other boys standing in your living room. You heard Jake sigh at your reaction and start to make his way down the stairs.

Standing amidst the usual crowd, Jay (your brothers absolute bestfriend of all time), Jungwon and Riki (two younger boys on the football team), was a boy you’d never seen before.

“Oh wow. This isn’t good.” Sunoo was whispering over your shoulder with a half smile as he followed your line of vision, patting you on the back and starting his way down the stairs after your brother.

The boy was a complete stand out amidst the others and their casual stances. They were dressed dark and sleek, eyes lazy and relaxed like there was nothing that could surprise them about how tonight would play out and by experience, you knew this to be true.

He was standing stiff as a board and ringing his hands uncomfortably, looking around your living room anxiously as he tried to take in the unfamiliar setting. You briefly mentally scolded the boys for letting him wear a sweater to a highschool party and then immediately thanked them for the same fact.

You were down the stairs and stood infront of him before he even processed you approaching and his eyes widened with surprise as he took a startled step back. Your hand was dangling in the middle of the both of you and he awkwardly took it in his.

“I’m Y/N Sim.” You practically purred at him and you vaguely heard Jay bark a laugh from a few feet behind you. The boys eyes darted over to your brother and his friends and then back at you with a curious expression.

“Heeseung.” His voice was quiet and unsure and you raised an eyebrow, keeping his hand in yours for longer than necessary. “Lee Heeseung.”

You repeated his name back to him with a smile, letting it roll off your tongue as you pushed some of your hair behind your ear. Normally by now you’d start to see the signs of infatuation, eyes darting down to your chest and breath catching when you leaned into their personal space.

Heeseung wasn’t doing either, in fact he just seemed more and more awkward and impatient as the seconds droned on. Your mouth twitched down in a shocked frown and you released your grip on his hand, watching as Jake wrapped an arm around his shoulder and ushered him away from you.

Your brother shot you a teasing smile over his shoulder, like he was mocking you for failing to catch his friends attention.

“Don’t look so gloomy sweetheart.” Jay’s voice was in your ear as you started walking to the car. “You’re going to eat him alive.”

——

You couldn’t take your eyes off of the boy.

He definitely had noticed your staring, awkwardly hovering in the corner of the party holding a completely full cup he’d been taking fake sips out of. Your brother had stuck with him for most of it before being dragged away by some other boys on the team for a game of cup pong.

You remembered the fact that Heeseung was supposedly on the football team too and you were suddenly curious what exactly he did. Maybe your brother had only mentioned it in an attempt to deter your advances.

He’d be disappointed to know it didn’t work, considering you were pushing off your seat at the kitchen counter and making your way to his side of the room.

When you were a few feet infront of him he seemed to realize you weren’t changing your course of movement and were in fact coming straight for him. He stiffened up against the wall and avoided looking at you.

“Hi Hee.” You ignored his behavior, leaning against the wall on your side so you could still look at him. You liked the slope of his nose and the way he nervously glanced at you from the corner of his eye.

“Hey Y/N.” He tried to sound casual but his voice cracked halfway through saying your name and your smile brightened, leaning forward slightly so your mouth was hovering closer to his ear.

“Not having fun?�� You leaned back after you spoke, noting the way he held his breath when you got closer and shifted in his stance once you leaned back against the wall.

He shrugged softly and you watched the way his thin shoulders fell back down. He definitely wasn’t small, towering over you and about double your width but he was lean and pretty, not to mention the way he curled in on himself made him seem tiny.

“I know something fun we can do.” You were leaning back towards him, this time letting your hand fall forward to hold his arm. The innuendo didn’t miss him and his wide eyes shot down to where you were touching him and then back to look at you.

“Jake said to not talk to you.” He was suddenly stuttering out but he didn’t make any move to leave or remove your hand from him. “He said if you said you liked me it wasn’t true.”

Your jaw ticked in anger as he spoke, wanting to go find Jake and teach him a lesson about interfering. But Heeseung was peering down at you with those big glossy eyes and he didn’t seem upset, just curious.

“That’s not very nice of him to say, is it?” You were practically cooing at the boy, lips forming a pout like it was the most hurtful thing you’d ever heard.

It worked considering the fact Heeseung immediately shook his head, eyes even more wide like he was worried he had somehow offended you.

Your hand that wasn’t on his arm slowly slid up to his neck, stopping to hold his face and turn him more so he was facing you and you weren’t staring at the side of him. He really was handsome, strong manly features sat nicely below his large eyes.

“Do you think I’m mean Hee?” You decided to use Jake’s words against him, batting your eyelashes with a pout and leaning against him. You felt a flash of satisfaction at the way his eyes went down to your jutted out lip and back up.

He didn’t reply after you said that and you briefly wondered if you pushed him too far for one night. You didn’t mind stretching it out, one time spending weeks with a boring tutor before he even seemed to realize you had boobs, but something about the way he peered down at you made you impatient.

He didn’t respond but he also, once again, made no move to push you off of him. If anything he seemed short of breath the longer you stood there pressed against him with your thumb on his chin.

You let out a small hum of satisfaction and pressed your thumb upwards against his bottom lip, holding it there for a second to see if he would object. He didn’t despite the way his eyes seemed to grow wider and wider every passing second.

His mouth parted and at first you thought he was going to speak, pausing and raising an eyebrow to make sure he wasn’t about to tell you to stop touching him. He looked suddenly mortified and closed his mouth with a snap, causing you to realize he was referring to your thumb pressing against his lip.

“Oh.” He genuinely shocked you, your confidence faltering for a second at the fact he was basically inviting your thumb into his mouth a second ago when you’d barely spoken to each other.

He was bright red and you had a feeling that if your grip on his chin wasn’t so tight, he would’ve disappeared into the crowd to avoid you.

“Sorry.” He was mumbling, voice so quiet you almost missed it beneath the loud music and stacked piles of random conversations.

“Do you want to go somewhere we can hear each other better?” You tried to keep the implication out of your words but you had a feeling you were oozing with sin and intent as you leaned up to speak against his ear.

Still, he was nodding almost like he was on autopilot and seemingly ready to go with you regardless of where you would take him. And that was music to your ears, excitement and tension causing you to smile before tugging him and turning around to leave the party.

You were immediately stopped in your path, your smile dropping into a scowl as you looked at your brother. He was stood infront of you with his arms crossed, Jay and Sunoo’s amused faces peeking over his shoulder at the thought of conflict.

“Excuse us.” You spat at him, tugging Heeseung again. He’d complete froze at the sight of your brother and only seemed to snap out of it at your pull, yanking his hand from yours as he collided with your back.

You stumbled forward and glared behind you at him, confused why he had let go of your hand. He was bright red again and avoiding looking at you, taking a step to the side so he was more on your brothers half of the stand off.

Jake had a satisfied smirk on his face at his obedience and you scoffed at them both, disgusted and angry eyes directed towards Heeseung who was cowering away from your glare.

“Alright.” Sunoo was dragging the word out, pushing past your brothers rigid frame and wrapping his arms around you. “Think it’s time we go.”

You let him steer you away from the boys, sending one last glare at your brothers victorious face. You felt a little fire light up in your stomach with the knowledge he was going to regret it.

——

“What about that junior in your art class. He’s easy on the eyes.” Sunoo was trying to keep your attention while in the lunch room, despite the knowledge most of his words were falling on deaf ears. “And not your brothers friend.”

That caught your attention slightly and you stopped your staring for a second, glancing at your friend before looking back across the hall where Heeseung was sat with the rest of the football idiots.

“If you’re going to tell me it’s immoral again, save your breath.” You half muttered and you heard him sigh softly from beside you.

He started to talk again but this time you truly didn’t hear him because Heeseung was looking around the room for a second before locking eyes with you. You sat up in your seat as you watched him freeze and look around to see if there was anyone else you could possibly be staring at.

When he seemed to determine he was the source of your attention, he awkwardly looked back at you and shifted uncomfortably in his seat. You cocked your head but didn’t do anything else, still slightly hurt from the night before.

“Earth to my supposed best friend.” Sunoo’s annoyed voice and shove against your shoulder caused you to break the staring contest with the boy, looking at him apologetically. “It’s fine, we can talk later. But your boy toys leaving.”

His eyes were falling over your shoulder with a quirked eyebrow, following Heeseung’s frame as he quickly shuffled out of the cafeteria and through the hallway doors. You looked frantically at Sunoo for permission and he waved you off with a dismissive hand.

You were on your feet and rushing towards the direction Heeseung had went before you could thank him, causing a few heads to turn towards you as you whipped past them.

Once you pushed through the large doors, you slowed your pace and flattened your skirt, attempting to look casual. You pulled your hair prettily in-front of your shoulders and peered around the hallway corners, trying to catch sight of which way Heeseung had gone.

It didn’t take very long before you were faltering in your tracks, seeing him standing against a closed locker and seemingly catching his breath.

“Hee?” You were standing a few feet away from him, leaning forward and cocking your head in a fake display of coincidence. “What are you doing out here?”

He glanced up at you with an unreadable expression. At first you thought he looked annoyed to see you but you realized quickly he was more so embarrassed at you catching him in a state of panic.

He raised his shoulders in a shrug again and you took a step closer, taking in his outfit now that he wasn’t hidden behind a lunch table. He was wearing another sweater, this one had a large V neck that he covered up with a plaid button up underneath it. You wondered briefly if he was hot at all underneath the layers.

“You shrug a lot don’t you.” As you spoke you casually approached him, leaning on the wall next the locker he was stood against.

He looked like he wanted to laugh at your words, mouth quirking for a bit before looking at you in a similar position to the previous night and frowning, eyes flashing with guilt and embarrassment again.

“I’m sorry.” He shook his head as he whispered and you quirked an eyebrow at his sudden mood change.

“For what part?” Beneath the urge to tease him and make him say it directly, you were genuinely curious what about last night he was apologizing for. For leaving you when your brother arrived or was he sorry for your little interaction a few seconds before that.

He looked at you with a sigh and an awkward shuffle in place, giving you your answer. He was too shy to voice it out loud and that led you to believe it was the latter he was attempting to apologize for.

“You’re sorry for that?” You frowned at him as you leaned closer again. He was watching you intensely, still standing awkwardly but seemingly expecting your actions more this time. “For wanting my fingers in your mouth?”

He was sucking in a breath at your blunt words, eyes going wide as he pressed himself against the locker like he wanted it to swallow him whole. You didn’t say anything else, you’d tipped far more than a toe in the waters and you may be a man eater but the last thing you wanted to do was make him uncomfortable.

“Don’t say that.” He was rushing out in a hissed whisper and looking around the empty hallway like somebody could be listening.

“Is that not what you wanted?” Your voice was dropping to a purr again and you could see him swallow the lump in his throat as your hand came to rest against his chest.

You wanted to touch him, desperately strangely enough, but more importantly you wanted to feel how fast his heart was racing and it didn’t disappoint. It was beating so fast you almost found it in yourself to be concerned.

A large part of you wanted to push him further, to make him tell you what he wanted so you could get to the fun part already, but a new part of you was liking toying around with him.

You found yourself curious what he was thinking as he blinked down at you, if he was thinking dirty things about you or if he wasn’t quite sure what that even consisted of. Was he just sweet and awkward or was he truly inexperienced.

Even weirder, you were wondering what you looked like to him. Both in the bodily sense, if he found you pretty or alluring, and in the sense in which he considered you to be a flirt or a whore.

You didn’t mind being a whore, you thought it was a beautiful powerful thing for a woman to be, but for some strange reason you didn’t want Heeseung to think that’s what this was.

Jay was right, you absolutely wanted to eat him alive but maybe you didn’t have to spit this one out after.

“I don’t know why I did that.” His whisper almost passed by you while you were stuck in your thoughts. You could feel his chest rise as he spoke and you liked the feeling, pressing your front against his similarly to how you did at the party.

“I didn’t say it was a bad thing.” You assured him, studying his features as he looked down at you. Your hand was leaving his chest to cup his cheek then and he took in a deep stuttering breath.

You let your thumb caress the skin on his cheek and he kept his eyes locked on yours despite the way they nervously twitched and sometimes shot over your shoulder like he was expecting an interruption.

“It’s weird.” He whispered and his breath fanned your face due to your proximity.

You frowned slightly at his words, although you had a feeling he didn’t truly mean them and he was just doing damage control incase you’d make fun of him. Still, you thought for a second before blindly reaching down between your bodies and gripping his wrist.

He made a strange startled noise at the direction of your hand, flushing when he realized you were only searching for his hand and not anything else. He didn’t object as you brought his limp hand up, only tensing slightly as you placed it on your cheek.

You didn’t say anything, waiting for a few seconds to see if he would take the hint on his own before sighing and moving his thumb with your hand that was covering his and placing it against your bottom lip.

He looked almost entranced at the movement, mouth parting in surprise as he felt your lip against his thumb. Then it was your turn to be surprised when he mirrored your movement from the other night and pressed down on it, almost instinctively.

Having startled himself, he started to pull his hand away but luckily you were still holding it in place against your cheek. Before he could make another move to remove it, you were parting your lips and pulling his thumb into your mouth.

He made another loud noise, a half shout nearly at the wet sensation on his digit and you would have laughed if you weren’t certain it would embarrass him to a point of no return.

You watched his reactions through your eyelashes as your hand moved to his wrist, feeling the bone and muscle twitch as you kept his hand in place. He didn’t say anything, watching you as you closed your lips around his thumb and held it there.

He met your eyes for just a second, immediately shooting back down to look where his thumb disappeared when he felt your tongue wrap around it in slow soothing circles.

The hall was silent outside of his heavy breaths and a low sucking sound as you pulled his wrist back and forth slowly so his thumb continued its movements in and out of your mouth. He was standing so stiff that you considered, for a moment, pulling back and asking him if this was okay.

Then he took a deep inhale and pressed his thumb flat against your tongue, causing your breath to catch in your throat with a slight choke. You faintly thought you heard him groan at the noise and you squeezed your hand that was around his wrist.

This seemed to snap him back to reality, eyes bulging as his movements froze completely. You kept your eyes on him even after he pulled his thumb from your mouth, avoiding eye contact with you as soft pants slipped from your lips.

“Do you still think it’s weird?”

——

A day or two passed without you seeing Heeseung, or more accurately without any firm interaction considering he darted away every time you rounded a corner.

This time you weren’t hurt by his avoidance, the hard part was finished and the seed of sin was blossoming in his pretty head. Now all you needed to do was wait for him to come crawling to your door, asking for more, and you’d finally have him.

You didn’t expect it so literally however. The soft knocks on your door after you’d just gotten home from school made you groan, expecting some form of real life spam mail or an annoyed neighbor, all the usuals. Instead your angry expression dropped off your face when you realized it was Heeseung behind the door.

He faltered at the sight of you, almost like he’d forgotten you lived here too. His expression was pained and you almost laughed at the way his eyes instinctively dropped to your mouth.

“Well hi.” You smiled at him and pushed your hip out to lean in the doorway, suddenly aware of the fact you were wearing little duck shorts from middle school. You don’t think he noticed, avoiding looking at your bare legs with all his might.

“Is Jake here?” He was mumbling, looking over your shoulder like he was hoping your brother would come and save him.

“I’m beginning to think I should be offended.” You were only half joking, a genuine disappointment building in your stomach. You’d never had a boy care so little about you, especially after you’d already made a move on him. “He’s at practice still, shouldn’t you know that?”

He didn’t say anything, staring at you for a while before blinking away and shuffling in place. You sighed and took a step to the side, signaling for him to come inside so he didn’t leave a dent in your porch.

He slowly and awkwardly came inside, pressing against the door to avoid touching any part of your body considering you were still perched against the doorway.

“It’s nice to see you.” You found yourself actually meaning this as you said it and nearly laughed at the way he whipped around to look at you in surprise. You’re not sure if he wasn’t expecting you to talk to him in general or just not expecting you to be in a good mood.

“What?” He spoke before he even realized he was and looked down at his shoes.

“I don’t know.” You shrugged and walked closer to him, noting the way he tensed and followed your frame. You moved past him to sit on the couch, patting the spot next to you and smiling. “I missed you.”

He slowly sat next to you, hesitating at the close proximity. Once he was sat, stiff and nervous, you scooted closer so your thighs were pressed together. If he didn’t notice your shorts before, he definitely did now judging by the way his eyes bulged and his hands twitched.

“You don’t know me.” He was shaking his head and you smiled slightly at the fact he was atleast comfortable enough to argue something you’d said.

“I think you’re cute.” You shrugged like it was obvious, watching the side of his face as he avoided looking in your direction. You were sat so close that if he looked at you, you’d probably be touching noses. “And I like your eyes.”

He glanced at you for a second, slight amusement on his face at your surface level answer. If he hadn’t figured out what you wanted by now, he slowly was. You watched as his hand twitched again.

“You want to touch me.” It was more of a statement than a question, shifting in your spot slightly. He didn’t say anything for a while eyes on your leg and you waited patiently, holding your breath so you didn’t scare him off.

“I don’t know.” His voice was breathy and pained like he was dealing with an inner dilemma. For a second he looked so guilty that you wondered if he was possibly religious, lips quirking up at the thought.

“You can.” He made no move despite your urging, glancing at you from the corner of his eye before shaking his head. “Do you want me to help you?”

He didn’t respond again but the sharp breath he took helped you understand his answer, his mannerisms becoming easier and easier for you to read. He didn’t flinch when you grabbed his wrist again, letting you carry his hand over to your leg and encage it with your own once it was touching your warm skin.

“Okay?” You were whispering, leaning your top half against him so you could rest your head on his shoulder. You liked to feel the sharp inhales he was taking as his body rose and fell.

He nodded swiftly and you decided now that he was definitely a virgin, the way his hand flexed and shuddered at the feeling of just your skin, being the most obvious sign. Excitement was bubbling under your skin again and you could hear Sunoo’s voice calling you immoral.

“Do you think I’m pretty?” You were turning your head on his shoulder to whisper against his neck and he made a startled noise at the feeling, hand tightening on your leg. You weren’t quite sure what prompted you to ask him that but you were suddenly desperate to hear his response.

He was nodding quickly for a second before actually responding, almost like he knew you wanted to hear him say it. “Yes. So pretty.”

You smiled and kissed the base of his neck in thanks, drinking in the small whimper like noise he made in response.

A minute or two passed in silence, you tightly pressed against him and listening to his sharp nervous breathing while he slowly relaxed his hand on your thigh, at some points being brave enough to gently caress your smooth skin with his thumb. You liked letting him explore, seeing how long it took for him to do the smallest things, but you were growing slightly impatient.

His hands were big, almost encasing the surface area of your leg and your hand looked extra small on top of his, slowly directing it upwards closer to the hem of your shorts. He met your gaze with a panicked look and you stopped in place for a few seconds, waiting for any sign of permission.

“Why are you doing this?” He was whispering as he turned to look you in your eyes, forehead nearly touching yours. He looked confused and pained and you almost felt a strange guilt as you looked at him.

“If you don’t want me to, I’ll stop.” You’d lost the purr in your voice, deadly serious as you spoke the most important words you could say to him. You were pushy and had a certain set of interests others might find disturbed, but you were absolutely not somebody who made others uncomfortable in a negative way.

“Are you just screwing with me?” He didn’t sound upset, just genuinely insecure and curious like he couldn’t understand why you would want him to be touching you.

You were pleased that despite being shy and not talking a lot, he wasn’t afraid to ask you things he found important. It reassured you that he would alert you if you pushed him too far, but you also were thrown off by his lack of self credit. Heeseung was definitely a dork and not the best in social situations, but he was stunning and sweet, not to mention large in size.

That small reminder caused you to glance down at his hand that was still on your leg, thumb just on the edge of hooking underneath your shorts. You pressed your legs together and looked back at him, noting the dark flash that passed in his eyes at the movement.

“I want you.” You spoke bluntly, not sure how else to reassure him the way he was searching for. You weren’t going to lie to him, you couldn’t sit here and tell this boy you wanted to date him and treat him good but you could definitely be honest with him and tell him why he was sat on your couch right now.

He looked at you in silence for a second like he was waiting for you to laugh or say something else, prove him right about his suspicions. When you kept your face firm and serious he sucked in a breath and nodded slowly, accepting that this was just something that was happening to him now.

You wondered for a second what type of place he’d lived before where girls didn’t find him attractive, suddenly very glad he was your brothers friend and you saw him before anybody else had the chance to corrupt his mind.

His hand was moving on it’s own now, a small burst of confidence at your blatant desire for him. He seemed unsure of his movements as his hand pushed up under the entrance to your small shorts, stopping and resting against your underwear clad hip, trapped between the two fabrics.

“Has anyone ever kissed you?” You were asking and he seemed confused that you chose to ask that instead of acknowledging him for touching you on his own. You smiled at that and noted for later use that he was searching for approval and praise.

He thought for a second and you wondered if he was considering whether or not to lie. Maybe he hadn’t caught on to your strict type yet and just figured you liked nerdy guys.

“Don’t lie to me. I don’t mind either way.” Your voice was suddenly firm at the command and then immediately softening in reassurance. It was truthfully too despite the fact you were most hopeful to him saying no.

He was shaking his head and you didn’t miss the way his eyes were stuck on your lips, hand flexing with impatience under your shorts.

“If I kiss you, you can’t ignore me anymore.” You whispered and he was nodding as you spoke. You were worried he was so eager for you to do something he wasn’t quite thinking before agreeing to things. And you meant what you said, if you kissed him it would be important to you.

“You can’t tell Jake.” He was suddenly saying and you almost laughed at the irony of him warning you not to tell your own brother, if anything it should be the other way around. You thought the fact he was seeking approval from the other boys was cute, despite it causing problems in your own desires.

He didn’t seem to appreciate the fact that you chuckled at him, frowning softly and trying to make his expression more serious. You liked the dazed out look on his face, almost like he was too drunk on touching you to think clearly. You couldn’t help yourself from surging forward and pressing your lips tightly against his.

He froze up, hand squeezing your leg now so tight it was almost painful. You didn’t expect him to know how to kiss you back but he still tried after he regained his composure, pushing his face forward into yours.

You pulled back quickly, pecking his lips three more times in small kisses in the process. Not wanting to overwhelm him, you leaned back slightly to study his expression. When his eyes fluttered back open he was looking at you with shock and excitement, not even noticing the way his hand was kneading your hip inside of your shorts.

You took a breath to prepare to ask him if that was okay when you were cut off by him leaning back into you and kissing you again.

Smiling against his lips, you brought your hands up to cup his face and try to guide him a little bit more so he wasn’t just pressing his lips against yours in a haste. Still you let him explore on his own for a bit, tilting your head back so he could push into you.

After 30 seconds of letting him get used to the feeling, you started to move your mouth against his in a smooth rhythm. He hummed, low and guttural, at the sensation of actually kissing you and in his eagerness to move forward and lean into you, his hand slipped and pressed itself directly over your core.

You both gasped into the kiss, for different reasons considering the fact he immediately lept away from you onto the other side of the couch and covered his mouth in panic and apology.

You were just opening your mouth to tell him it was alright, more than okay in your opinion, when the front door was swinging open. You immediately closed your lips in anger and frustration at the sight of your brother who was observing the situation with squinted eyes.

It definitely looked damning, your shorts were ridden up on your thigh and Heeseung was sat a few feet away panting and running a hand through his hair to try to flatten it down.

Jake gave you a knowing look, a sharp glare and your lips curled into a smirk as you shrugged at him.

——

It was a day or two later and you were stood in the center of your room, staring at yourself in the mirror and trying to decide which color bathing suit you wanted to wear.

The boys all planned to go to the beach today, one last warm weekend before the fall season started and they were jammed packed with peak football busyness. Luckily for you, despite your current silent war you were having, Jake had extended the invitation to you and Sunoo too.

“The pinks way better.” Speaking of Sunoo, he was in his usual position that he adorned anytime you were getting dressed before heading out. Laying on his stomach with his feet in the air on your bed, watching you with a keen eye and sharp opinions.

You frowned at his comment, unsure and feeling slightly insecure. Trying not to think about how strange that was for you, you nodded in confirmation and pulled shorts and a hoodie over your suit for the ride there.

By the time you got to the car you were feeling pretty awful about the days direction, knowing yourself well enough to know something as small as not feeling pretty could ruin your mood completely. You tried to keep your energy light, planning to relax once you got there and not risk ruining anybody’s else day in collateral damage.

When the van door slid open, your eyes widened upon seeing Heeseung sat in your usual seat, his expression mirroring your own.

“Hope you don’t mind Y/N.” Riki was leaning forward from the backseat and smiling brightly at you. “Thought it would be cool to kidnap the new kid.”

You didn’t say anything, eyes sliding back over to Heeseung who was looking at you with heavy awkwardness but not avoiding your eye contact. You felt lighter at the knowledge he wasn’t taking what you had said about ignoring you lightly.

Climbing into the van and towards the back seat, you and Sunoo sat beside Riki and relaxed for the rest of the ride.

You liked being in the back like this, your position giving you the perfect view of Heeseung’s side profile. He kept glancing back at you throughout the drive, looking more and more surprised that your gaze never drifted from him.

You hadn’t spoken to him since kissing him, he had immediately stood from the couch with awkward posture and shuffled off in the direction Jake was leading him, not sparing you a glance.

You’d spent that night scrolling through his socials, atleast the ones that weren’t private, and wondering if you should message him or not. That thought didn’t last long, far too out of character for you and you’d already been accidentally doing that.

Heeseung didn’t need to know you were thinking about him before you went to sleep that night and he definitely didn’t need to know that you didn’t normally kiss the boys you played with.

After you’d gotten to the beach and all the boys had dog piled their way out of the van, you tugged your shorts down uncomfortably and followed behind them at a much slower pace. You liked observing them despite your bad mood, especially the playful laughs Sunoo let out as he joked around with them.

You were so caught up in your people watching that you didn’t notice Heeseung also lagging behind until he was walking side by side with you, keeping his distance but sparing you quick glances as you walked.

It surprised you that he both wasn’t ignoring you and that he was willingly being alone with you while your brother was only a few yards in front.

A strange satisfaction ran through you and you smiled in Heeseung’s direction, brightly when his ears and cheeks flushed bright red.

After the boys had set up the blankets and chairs, they ran off towards the water and you settled into one of the plastic seats. Jay was still stood near you, applying sunscreen diligently and squinting against the bright sun.

“You should let me put some on you.” He was saying once you took off your hoodie and you scoffed without looking at him. You didn’t mind Jay despite his flirting but you had no doubt his eyes were glued to your chest as he proposed applying the sunscreen to your bare skin.

“I’m serious.” He laughed at your reaction, knowing what you were thinking. “In a friendly way, I promise.”

You looked at him now from over your sunglasses, analyzing his expression as you felt the sun heat up your exposed skin.

“Fine.” You sighed and rolled over onto your stomach so he could have easier access to your back. “But you touch me inappropriately with your grubby hands and I’ll cut them off.”

“I bet your brother would first anyways.” You could hear the smile in his voice as he spoke, kneeling down on the sand next to you. You heard the cap of the bottle open as he squeezed a good amount into his hands and pressed them onto your skin. “Besides, I know you have your sights set on another suitor.”

You didn’t have to ask him what he was referring to, seeing no point in playing dumb. Both Jay and you knew a very large reason you’d never responded to his advances was because your specific type, and you also both knew who happened to fit that type perfectly.

“He’s cute.” You shrugged the best you could in your position and Jay pressed his thumb into your back, a light massage now as you talked.

“Sure, if you’re into that.” He chuckled softly and you smiled even though he couldn’t see it. “Not so cute with the way he’s glaring at me right now though.”

You sat up upon hearing that, resting on your elbows and looking over your shoulder towards the water where the rest of the boys had disappeared. At first you thought Jay was just teasing until you caught sight of Heeseung and confirmed the icy stare he was directing towards the two of you.

It was so out of his usual character that you felt genuine shock wrack through you, rolling over and sitting up properly.

After a few seconds of holding eye contact with each other he was wading out of the water and heading in your direction, Jay laughed and stood up swiftly with a mumble about ‘knowing when to leave’. He passed Heeseung on his way to the water and gave him a pat on the chest that you didn’t quite understand.

When he reached where you were sitting, you felt slightly hypnotized by the way he looked. He was standing over you and blocking out the sun, hair wet and dripping onto his tight swim shirt. He almost looked angry and your eyes dropped down to his extended hand that was pointing in your direction.

“Do you want to get ice cream with me?” Despite his tense exterior, his voice still sounded the exact same, a nervous quiver making his words quiet and stuttered.

He looked relieved when you nodded and took his hand, letting him pull you up onto your feet and help steady you.

The ice cream shop was connected to the beach but a bit away in the distance, leaving you out of view from the rest of your group and a bit more private. He hadn’t spoken the entire walk there and you were beginning to worry with how tense his shoulders were, stopping him before he turned the corner and softly guiding him so his back hit the side of the building.

He looked down at you as you crowded his space, pushing against him despite how cold the wetness of his shirt felt against your bare chest.

“What’s wrong?” You looked up at him through your eyelashes and he blinked down at you, jaw twitching with how tense it was

“Why didn’t you ask me?” He responded and you felt confused for a second before understanding he was referring to Jay applying your sunscreen.

The realization that he was jealous caused a surge of excitement to pass through you and you rocked forward on your toes, pressing against him harder if that was even possible.

“You walked away and he offered.” Your lips formed a pout despite your giddiness and his eyes went from your lips down to your chest that was smushed against his front.

You felt the sudden desperation to touch him or to have him touch you, maybe even to kiss him again. You just wanted to be as close to him as humanly possible, you wanted him to call you pretty again and you weren’t quite sure what to feel about this overwhelming urge.

“Don’t be mad at me Hee.” You continued after he didn’t say anything, his eyebrows pulled forward in a confused and jealous expression. You didn’t think he was actually mad at you but you didn’t like how his face didn’t have its usual softness.

“I’m not mad, I don’t know.” He confirmed your thoughts and shook his head, eyes softening just a little when he looked down at you again.

“Are you jealous?” You pressed on the subject, having a feeling he wouldn’t admit it on his own.

“I didn’t mind it I guess… seeing him touch you.” He admitted softly and you suddenly were plagued with the thought that he might be a lot less innocent than you thought. If anything he seemed a bit curious at the thought of somebody else touching you. “I just…”

“Wanted it to be you?” You filled in the blank for him as he trailed off and he nodded after a second.

You wanted to laugh at this but you didn’t, not wanting him to get embarrassed. Yet it was almost comical that he had absolutely no idea how much more of a chance he had with you than Jay, than any of the other boys who were constantly competing for your attention.

Instead of explaining this to him, you stood up on your toes again and pulled him down for a kiss.

Your hands were in his wet hair and a sudden shudder ran through you at the way he had to bend down to reach your mouth.

He was taken off guard for a second before kissing you back, this time immediately moving his mouth against yours in a nice slow rhythm like you had shown him next time. He was a fast learner and you felt giddy at that fact.

The kiss was sweet and slow, giving him the silent reassurance he seemed to be asking for but you felt growing impatience at the pace when you realized you were completely pressed against his lean body in a state of undress, tugging on his wet hair slightly in an attempt to catch his attention.

It seemed to work because you felt his shaky hands come up and rest on your lower back, pulling you tighter against him as he breathed an unsteady gasp against your lips. You liked the way he continuously tugged you forward despite there being no way you could get any closer to him.

His hands were fast and desperate as your mouths moved with eachother, the addicting feeling of kissing you clouding his mind and helping him forget all the anxiety and uneasiness he was originally feeling in your presence.

His knees were weakening and he slid down the wall slightly, legs jutting out at the weird angle so his leg was pressed slightly between your own, he immediately stopped pulling on your figure and kissing you, glancing down at what he’d just done.

He seemed unsure about the fact his knee was now practically hovering between your legs as you kept him trapped against the brick wall.

“Heeseung.” Your breathy use of his full name caught his attention and he snapped his head up to look at you. You didn’t say anything else, just nodding your head and kissing him again.

He accepted this as a form of permission, another surge of excitement and confidence pushing him to pull you closer again. This time, because of the new position, you were practically rocking against his bent leg as you breathed into his mouth.

You tried not to think about the fact you were practically dry humping him out in public, licking into his mouth to test his reaction to you pushing the kissing even further.

He half groaned, half whimpered at the feeling and squeezed his hands that were around your waist causing you to laugh at the ticklish sensation. Your laugh was interrupted by him pushing his tongue into your mouth suddenly, trying and failing to mirror what you had just done to him. You tugged on his hair again as a sign to take it slower, giving him a soft peck before demonstrating again.

You did that a few times, licking into his mouth and kissing him open mouthed and sloppy before pulling away to catch your breath and observe his reaction.

His normally wide eyes were downturned and hazy, dark with want and excitement as he experienced this emotion he’d never felt before. He felt addicted to you and the way you were melting against him, perched on his bent knee and taking pretty little gasps for air as you tried to calm yourself down.

“Fuck.” You were breathing out in a sigh and he couldn’t help but smile slightly at your state, feeling proud he had been the one to cause it. His cheeks were still bright red and you felt the urge to kiss him again. “You sure you haven’t done that before?”

This seemed to embarrass him further and he shifted against the wall, his shirt sticking to the rough material of the brick. He was practically dry by now and your hand left his hair to drag it’s way down his chest and stomach.

You could feel the muscle tensing and flexing under your touch despite the shirt creating a barrier between your skin to his and you felt mesmerized by the smooth slope of his stomach. He seemed to be taking in your outfit now too, possibly for the first time realizing how little clothes you were wearing.

“I didn’t know what to wear.” You were breathing out, overly aware of how self conscious you’d been earlier in the day regarding your bikini. It was pink and frilly, the bottoms fabric poking out from the top of your jean shorts.

“It’s perfect.” He was whispering, eyes locked on your chest and stomach. Then he was flushing again and looking back at you, embarrassment furthering at the way you quirked your eyebrow at him. “It’s pretty I mean.”

You didn’t respond, an unfamiliar blush on your cheeks at the sincerity in his compliment. You felt slightly angry at yourself for the way his validation changed your mood in seconds.

“Are you still upset.” You eventually asked and he shifted against the wall again, hands on your back pulling you tight like he didn’t even realize he was doing it.

“Wasn’t upset.” He mumbled and shrugged, holding your eye contact for once. “He just talks about you sometimes.

This peaked your interest slightly and you cocked your head at him. You knew Jay thought you were hot and liked to mess with you to piss your brother off but you hadn’t considered the fact he might actually be voicing desires for you when you weren’t around to hear.

“What’s he say?” You questioned and Heeseung suddenly looked like he did when you first met, awkward and squeamish.

“Just..” He was mumbling and squirming against you with a frown. “Stuff he wants to do to you I guess.”

You didn’t say anything, just humming in understanding and studying his features and expression. He looked slightly pale and like he was rethinking the things his friend had said in private, jaw tensing again like it had by the water.

“Stuff like.. kissing me?” You flattened your hand on his chest as your voice turned into a low drawl. “Sticking his tongue in my mouth and letting me feel good on his thigh?”

His mouth was parting in a small breath as you kept talking, slowly understanding you were describing things you’d done with him to make a strong point.

“Let him talk.” You shrugged and kissed his jaw, taking a small step away from him afterwards. “I’ve made my choice.”

——

After ushering a flustered Heeseung back to the water, ignoring the glare from Jake at your lack of ice cream, you found yourself actually managing to have fun.

You joined in on playing with them in the water, playing chicken against Sunoo, him on Riki’s shoulders and you ontop of Heeseung’s.

His strength surprised you, winning all three rounds before you were tapping out and practically coughing out water with messy hair and a bright smile. The sun was setting by the time you all left and you liked the way he looked on the drive home far more than the trip there, eyes tired and skin tanned.

The night you were rolling around in bed again, trying not to disturb a sleeping Sunoo next to you while you locked and unlocked your phone in frustrated contemplation.

Eventually you gave in to your desire, pressing follow on Heeseung’s private instagram and immediately shutting your phone off and pressing it tight to your chest when it alerted you a request had been sent to him.

You felt incredibly stupid for acting like this and like you weren’t in control of your emotions for the first time in a very long time. You think part of you liked that factor about the types of people you normally were with, the control was completely and utterly up to you and they’d pretty much follow you into battle if you batted your eyelashes the right way.

Heeseung had a weird way of making you feel helpless, despite making no move himself to control you or the things you did, he still had an upsetting power over you that you don’t even think he realized.

Proven correct again by the way your heart surged as your phone vibrated against your chest, lifting it up and squinting at the bright screen to see he had accepted your request and followed you back.

You wondered what he was doing up this late, nearing 3am now and opened up his profile to see if he had any post. There was only a handful and you scrolled to the bottom first, studying a pretty photo of a dog in a window without a caption.

The next three post were also pretty simple, photos of sunsets and a guitar leaning against a wall that you assumed was in his room. The four most recent were what caught you attention, actually featuring him and other people unlike the other ones which seemed more atmosphere focused.

You smiled softly at the photo of him and your brother, Jake in his football uniform with black paint smeared across his face as he appeared mid yell with an arm around Heeseung’s shoulder. You noted the camera around Heeseung’s neck and realized you had been right about Jake lying and he wasn’t actually on the football team, just working with them.

The fondness you felt looking at the photo was followed by a pang of guilt as you looked at the next one, another photo with Jake but this time with the rest of the boys as well.

Heeseung was in the middle of the mirror selfie with a bright smile on his face, one you hadn’t seen and the other boys were crowding around him in different poses. You opened the comments to see them having various discussions, but all for the most part, praising Heeseung for taking a photo of his face and posting it.

The final two made your breath catch in your throat, considering the fact you were in both of them.

You weren’t sure when he had taken the first one, a photo of you lazily strewn in the plastic chair at the beach. You were adjusting your sunglasses and mid laugh at something that, you assume Sunoo, was saying off in the distance.

It must’ve been some time after your water fights considering your hair was wet across your shoulders and you weren’t wearing the shorts you had been before. The sun was cascading prettily and you don’t remember if it was actually that beautiful out or if he had edited the photo expertly.

You’d always been aware of the fact that people found you pretty, having heard it pretty much your entire life even when you didn’t quite believe it or know how to respond. You’re sure nowadays people found it as a negative thing, thinking you were too full of yourself when you fluffed your perfectly crafted hair or conceited in the way you constantly reapplied mascara and lipgloss. But for the first time in your entire life, staring at this photo he’d taken of you, you thought you looked beautiful.

You liked it hesitantly, scrolling up to see the second and final one of you.

You’d seen him take this one, it was right after he’d taken a few of Jake and Jay as they dried off and joked around with each other and then he was turning the camera towards you.

A smile spread across your face making your cheeks hurt as you looked at it. You were staring at the camera with a shocked look on your cheery face, a peace sign held up in a blur of movement from your fast attempt at a pose before he clicked the button.

These ones didn’t have any captions either but something about him picking two photos of you from all the ones you’d seen him taking today made your heart race in a way that made you slightly queasy. He was continuing to surprise you and more noticeably, making you surprise yourself.

“Can you shut that shit off?” Sunoo’s groggy voice was immediately snapping you out of your little dream like thought process, the brightness of your screen waking him up.

“I think I like him.” You let your words hang in the darkness, not liking the way he fell completely silent at your whispered statement.

“That’s new.” He eventually breathed out and you heard him turn onto his side, trying to look at you in the darkness. You were laying flat on your back and staring up at the ceiling in contemplation. There was some left over glow in the dark stars from a middle school sleepover the two of you had.

“Yeah.” You breathed out in response. “Well.. goodnight.”

——

By the time you had finally woken up, eyes peeling open with a groan, Sunoo was already up and out of bed. You could hear him off somewhere in your house, laughing loudly at something.

You frowned and checked the time, noting the two notifications underneath the numbers alerting you it was already past noon.

Jake was one of the notification banners, sending you a message to announce the fact he was having a party tonight. Your frown deepened as you read that. Your weekends were usually filled with bouncing from different houses with each other but it was rare you held one at home.

The other notification changed your mood, seeing that Heeseung had seemingly liked every single one of your instagram post while you had been sleeping.

You smiled to yourself giddily at the thought of him scrolling through your page, without thinking you were pressing the ‘message’ tab on his page and typing.

y/n : hi

heeseung : Hey

y/n : woah that was fast

heeseung : Sorry

heeseung : Should I wait a bit

You laughed out loud at the fact he was somehow able to be more awkward over text than he already was in person, a fondness settling in your tired head.

y/n : will i see u tonight?

A few seconds passed without a response despite the little words under your message letting you know he had read it immediately, most likely sitting with your chat open similarly to how you were with his.

heeseung : I’m actually already here… downstairs to be specific

y/n : will u come up here?

You sent the message before you thought about it and you watched his activity status turn off after he read your message.

You immediately panicked and sat up swiftly, you hadn’t even considered the fact you were freshly woken up and he had never seen you in any state of slightly natural, suddenly overwhelming insecure of how you looked.

Before you had a chance to get out from under the covers or look in the mirror, soft knocks on your door were making you freeze and hold your breath.

You felt ridiculous once Heeseung poked his head inside your door, his big round eyes brightening when he saw you sat up with your blankets covering your lap. He looked excited to see you and you quickly forgot about your appearance or what he might’ve been thinking at the sight of you. He clearly was happy to see you.

“Hey.” He breathed out, sliding through a small gap in your door and softly closing it behind him. You wondered if he gave Jake an excuse for leaving or just hoped he wouldn’t notice his absence.

“Hi.” You smiled warmly at him and patted the side of your bed that was empty, where Sunoo had been sleeping a few hours before. He glanced at you in confusion for a second before hesitantly walking closer to your bed and slowly lowering himself onto it.

It creaked underneath his weight and you laughed softly at his slow movements, lifting the blankets once he was sat down and tossing them over his lap so you were both halfway underneath the covers.

“Are we taking a nap?” He was whispering in a joking tone and you briefly acknowledged the fact he was a lot more casual around you in terms of saying things on his mind.

You were a bit nervous about this change in pacing between the two of you. Maybe he had come up to your room expecting something similar to your past interactions, maybe he was even disappointed as he laid next to you in your warm bed with no sign of your usual devil horns peeking through.

“Is that okay?” Even when unsure of yourself, you liked to remain blunt and honest.

He looked at you for a few beats, eyes warm and knowing like he had somehow figured out your insecurity. Then he was nodding and laying back against the pillow, outstretching an arm onto yours so when you laid down, it’d be against him and not your fabric.

You curled against his side and silently appreciated him for not saying anything, drinking in his silence and resting your head on his chest so you could listen to his heartbeat.

Surprisingly, it was still racing just as fast as it normally was despite only laying in bed with you. He was showing no signs of nervousness or anxiety, or maybe you were still half asleep and were just failing to pick up on his usual signs.

“Are you nervous?” You whispered for some reason and he tightened his arm around you, rubbing your back slowly and uncertainly.

“I’m always nervous I think.” He was whispering back and you almost laughed at the drama of it all. “Especially around you.”

You hummed softly, your hand coming up to rest against his stomach so you could feel his inhales better. He was wearing a white tshirt and you could feel his muscles tensing at your touch.

“Because I’m pretty?” You tried not to sound desperate when you asked, not wanting him to think you were fishing for compliments. You just wanted to hear him say it for some reason.

“Yeah, you’re pretty.” He seemed to always know what you were thinking, immediately fulfilling your request despite the blush it brought to his cheeks. “And you’re nice to me.”

This caught your attention more than the first part, although that also undeniably made your face flush. You weren’t quite sure you’d be at all nice to him, sure you hadn’t made a fool out of him or completely ignored him but you were genuinely taken back by the fact he thought you were nice.

You’d heard charming, alluring and even, at times, manipulatively sweet but it was rare somebody told you they thought you were kind.

“Why wouldn’t I be nice to you?” You pushed forward in your low spoken questioning, liking the vulnerability this position gave you. You were the closest you’ve ever been but you couldn’t see each others faces, making it easier to speak freely.

You felt his body move in what, you could only assume, was a small shrug. His hand stopped moving on your back and you shifted closer to him, frowning slightly at his sudden silence.

“You’re nice too.” You decided to say eventually, feeling embarrassed at the openness.

“I’m sure everybody’s nice to you.” He was slowly sounding more tired and you wanted to sit up and shake him awake so you could keep talking. “It must be hard not to be.”

You didn’t like the way he said that, like you were somebody deserving of good treatment all the time. You suddenly felt a pang of guilt at the reminder of who you were, why he was even in your bed in the first place.

“It’s different.” You said instead, not wanting to give those nasty thoughts too much attention. “You’re actually nice. Not because you want to sleep with me or get close to my brother.”

“I think sleeping with you would solidify me never being close to your brother again.” You could hear the smile in his voice and you laughed against his chest. He seemed looser when he was tired and you wanted to ask him all the things he’d normally be too shy to say out loud.

A minute passed in the silence and you realized through the soft rise and fall of his stomach that he had fallen asleep, arm limp in it’s place on your side.

You tried not to think about any of the things bothering you despite Sunoo’s voice in your head reminding you that your normal habits were immoral. Focusing in instead on the soft beat of Heeseung’s heart, you let yourself fall back asleep against him.

——

By the time you woke up again, even more groggy and out of it than you had been the first time, you could tell it was later in the day.

The soft blue haze of the sun setting was filling up your room and you almost started to stretch like normal before remembering you hadn’t fallen asleep alone, sitting up slightly in confusion at the lack of company in your bed.

Heeseung wasn’t there anymore and the blankets were messy like he had left in a hurry. You waited for a few seconds to listen in for him, maybe in your connected bathroom a few feet away but after not hearing anything and feeling the fact the bed was cold on his side you figured he had left some time ago.

You weren’t mad at him considering the fact the party had probably begun to start by now, you sleeping most the day away after having such a long night, but you couldn’t help but feel disappointed that he hadn’t left a note or sent a text.

You immediately felt stupid for thinking like this considering he was most likely just downstairs with the other boys and it wasn’t like he went home in the middle of the night, he knew he’d see you even if he left. It wasn’t like you to act like this over a boy and it would’ve been more frustrating and worrisome if he wasn’t so kind and gentle with you.

Finally climbing out of bed, you dressed yourself in a skirt and a hoodie before fixing your hair and applying some mascara. They were most likely pregaming by now, maybe a few early stragglers stopping by to get ahold of the best drinks before they were gone. But you didn’t really feel the need to overdo your appearance like you typically did, feeling more comfortable since it was held at your house and you could always come and change if the situation called for it.

You were leaving your room and making your way to the stairs when you heard unfamiliar laughs and voices coming from the living room.

Pausing against the railing, you froze and listened in to what they were saying once you heard your name from one of their mouths.

“I mean you have to tell us dude, she has to be good considering how much she’s ran through.” One of the boys from the football team was talking and you could practically hear the smile in his voice.

You weren’t sure who he was talking to but it didn’t bother you much considering you’d heard it before, rumors from classmates and name calling from boys who were mad you had turned them down.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” This definitely bothered you. Heeseung’s sweet nervous voice was floating up the stairs and you heard the other boys started laughing again at the way his voice shook.

“C‘mon man, I totally saw you leaving her room earlier when Sim called.” Another boy was speaking now and you wondered how many were down there and why your brother wasn’t with Heeseung.

You considered marching down there and dragging Heeseung away from the teasing, but you figured that would only put him in a worse spot. You didn’t mind anybody knowing you were doing things with him but you knew he was serious about Jake not finding out.

“Why would I fuck her?” Heeseung was talking again and your heart dropped at his tone of voice, almost sounding disgusted by the idea. “Like you said, she’s ran through.”

You didn’t hear anything else after that, ears deafening once the boys started to laugh and seemingly smack his back in approval for his harsh words against you. Your throat felt hot with embarrassment and panic was filling up your chest and head.

“Y/N? What are you doing up there?” Jake’s concerned voice filtered through and you looked down through the gaps in the banister, seeing him having just walked through the door with groceries bags dangling from his arm.

Your teary eyes shuffled over towards Heeseung and the football players to see him standing completely rigid as he looked up at you, Jake calling attention to you and your hiding place.

There was no use in pretending you hadn’t heard what he said, your expression betraying you and making it extremely obvious.

You were turning around and darting back into your room, slamming the door and throwing yourself onto your bed in a sob. Burying your face into the pillow, you groaned in frustration at the fact it smelled like Heeseung and you threw it onto the floor.

You’ve heard these things before, even worse at times but for some reason hearing him say it felt like the worst thing possible.

It was the scariest thing in the world, the way you felt about him so soon, but for once you were finding yourself liking the loss of control. It felt safe and comfortable, completely opposing how it normally felt.

You weren’t sure if he actually thought those things about you or if he was just trying to douchebag his way out of an awkward conversation but it didn’t matter to you regardless, his voice looping in your head with that unfamiliar tone.

A vibration under your stomach was causing you to pick up your sniffly face, eyes squinted with tears as you shuffled around to try to find your abandoned phone you were apparently smothering.

When you finally managed to feel it against your wandering hand you saw a few different text chain alerts.

One from Sunoo, asking if you were okay and if he could come up or if you wanted some space. Another was from Jake again, double texting to ask a similar thing followed by telling you he’d cancel the party if you wanted him to.

You responded to them both quickly, telling Sunoo you were okay and you’d talk to him later and letting Jake know you didn’t care about the party you’d just stay in your room.

The third message was from Heeseung’s instagram account but you didn’t look at it, shutting off your screen and yelling into your blanket.

You thought for just a second about getting up out of your bed and putting on your best outfit, going down to join the party and acting like Heeseung hadn’t affected you as much as he did.

But that was the thing you liked most about him. You didn’t feel the need to play this character or hide behind an emotionless mask.

Instead you spent the rest of the night in that same position, listening to the music gradually get louder as more and more people filled into your house. You almost wanted to laugh at the irony of you, a complete party goer with a carefree lifestyle, hiding from an exciting night just a few feet away.

Hours were passing like that, your mind racing with thoughts of what they could be doing down there. You wondered if Heeseung wanted to follow you up here but was too shy or if he had no plans of coming at all. You curled into a ball on your side.

Eventually you let yourself fall asleep again, body feeling heavy and exhausted from crying and overthinking. You couldn’t have been asleep long before you were waking up again to soft knocks against your door, you frowned deeply and ignored them.

You figured it was some drunken idiot, maybe a couple looking for a room to hook up in and you didn’t have the energy to tell them to go away so you just laid there in silence and hope they didn’t try to turn your unlocked doorknob. That hope didn’t last long before you heard the soft rattle of the metal, the knob squeaking as it twisted and your door was pushed open just a sliver.

Nobody came through it at first, like they were waiting for a reaction from you, and then Heeseung’s head was poking through it just how it did this morning.

The scene was a direct replay but the mood was completely flipped now, his face lacking any sign of a warm smile and instead looking startled at the fact you were awake and looking at him coming into your room.

“Were you hoping I was asleep so you could just leave?” You looked away from him as you spoke, rolling back onto your stomach to try to look less pathetic and more casual.

He didn’t say anything, coming into your room considering the fact you hadn’t screamed at him to get out, and closing the door behind him.

“I wanted to talk to you.” He was stuttering and you had a feeling he was wringing his hands together but he sounded sure of himself.

You sighed and turned your head to look at him from your spot on the bed. He was awkwardly hovering next to the bed and looking at you, face crumpling with guilt when he saw your puffy eyes and red cheeks.

“Or I can just suck your dick and you can go and rate it on a scale of 1-10 for the entire school body.”

His eyebrows furrowed at your sarcasm and he slowly sat on your bed, keeping his distance and barely resting against the edge of it.

“That’s not funny.” He shook his head as he spoke, his back was towards you but he was looking over his shoulder at you.

“It seemed to be earlier.” That was slightly unfair of you considering he hadn’t been laughing with them earlier from what you could tell but his harsh words had been replaying in your mind for hours and you weren’t feeling the most gentle towards him.

“They just got in my head I don’t know.” He was still shaking his head and pressing his hands tightly against his knees. “They kept talking about what you do and I just wanted it to be different.”

“It is different.” You were cutting him off and his jaw twitched slightly. He didn’t seem to know how to explain himself properly and he was digging himself a bigger hole. “I thought what we were doing was different.”

“How?” He was turning more so he could look at you more directly, eyebrows furrowed in an angry expression you hadn’t seen before. “What’s different about this? Jake told me the same thing when I first got here, I know you’re just going to drop this once it’s over.”

“Everything is different about this.” You sat up now, perched on your knees and leaning forward on your hands for emphasis. “I’m not going to sit here and feel bad about my sex life because of your ego Heeseung.”

His face dropped and he shook his head. You knew he wasn’t like that and he wasn’t directly shaming you for being experienced, he was just insecure and didn’t know how to express it. But that wasn’t an excuse for the things he had said about you.

“If you want to hide… whatever this is than fine that’s your choice.” Your voice wavered as you said it, the thought stinging slightly of him being ashamed to be with you. “You could have lied or brushed them off but you chose to insult me and say horrible things.”

His face was softening again in guilt and you were slightly confused before you realized you were crying again. He seemed to lean forward without realizing it and you sat back up on your knees to keep distance between you.

“I’m sorry.” He looked and sounded genuine and you wanted to believe he was but you had also never thought he’d be capable of something like that, so maybe you were trusting him too blindly.

“You made it sound disgusting.” You spat the final word out, face curling in a hurt sob and then he was pulling you into a tight hug, falling forward on your knees and crashing into his chest.

You wanted to be able to push him off of you and tell him to leave your room, leave your house better yet, but you couldn’t help wrapping your arms around his neck and crying into the same soft shirt you’d been sleeping peacefully on a few hours ago.

“It’s not disgusting.” His voice was causing his chest to vibrate and you could feel his heartbeat against your cheek. “I’m such an idiot and there’s absolutely nothing wrong with being with you.”

He sounded the most confident you’d heard him, voice lacking its usual quiver and stutter other than the heavy weight of emotion behind his statement.

“You’re right, it was a total ego thing. I didn’t understand why somebody as confident and pretty as you would be interested in me.” He continued on and you wanted to interrupt and dispute his negative claims against himself but you decided to let him finish since he, for once, seemed sure in his words.

“I like spending time with you even if it hasn’t been that long.” You sniffled as he spoke and burrowed into his chest so he knew you were still listening. “Even if Jake tackles me next time he sees me.”

You laughed at that and you felt him rest his chin on top of your head. You were still upset but his words were helping and you wanted to believe him, you were just contemplating if it was worth abandoning the techniques you’d been using to avoid getting hurt like this.

“Maybe I should have asked you on a date before trying to put my fingers in your mouth.” You were whispering against his chest and he barked a laugh at your sudden blunt joke.

Neither of you said anything after that, letting each other think over the situation and sit in a tight hug, you practically in his lap now. You felt a strange tug at your heart regarding the fact there was complete innocence between you despite the compromising position.

“Is this a bad time to ask you on a date then?” He eventually was whispering above your head and you smiled softly into his shirt.

#enhypen #enhypen drabbles #enhypen fanfiction #heeseung #heeseung drabbles #heeseung x reader #jake enhypen #sunghoon x reader #sunghoon enhypen #heeseung au #heeseung smut #kim sunoo #jay enhypen

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megalony · 9 months

Text

Double Trouble

This is an Evan Buckley imagine based on a request from my amazing @missdreamofendless I hope you all like it. Feedback and requests are greatly appreciated.

Taglist: @lunaticspoem@butlegendsneverdie@langdonzvoid@jennyggggrrr@rogmeddows@radiob-l-a-hblah@rogertaylorsbitontheside@chlobo6@rogertaylors-lipgloss@sj-thefanthefan@omgitsearly@luckytrashgooprebel@scarsout@deaky-with-a-c@killer-queen-ofrhye@bluutac@vousmemanqueez-blog@jonesyaddiction@milanosaurus@httpfandxms@saint-hardy@7-seas-of-fat-bottomed-girls@mrsalwayswritex @rogerina-owns-me @hellsdragon@im-an-adult-ish@crazylittlethingg@allauraleigh@onceuponadetectivedemigod@ceres27@avyannadawn@noonenuts@sleepylunarwolf@coverupps@justagirlthatlovedtoread @musicistheway @avada-kedavra-bitch-187 @luula @missdreamofendless @bradleybeachbabe @woderfulkawaii @topguncultleader @amberpanda99 @daggersquadphantom @marvel-and-chicago-fan @angryknightstatesmantrash @minjix @lyjen

911 Masterlist

Summary: (Y/n) and Evan are expecting twins, but things don't go to plan when complications in the pregnancy arise.

Enjoy.

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Tilting her head back, (Y/n) leaned her head on Evan's shoulder when he sat down next to her and his arm fell around her shoulders. She could feel his thumb brushing up and down her bare shoulder and he took a large swig of beer even though his lips were curved into a grin, making it hard.

His soft, wet lips pressed against her temple and stayed there for a few moments while (Y/n) closed her eyes and leaned into the touch.

"How do you feel?" He asked quietly, daring to dart his eyes around the garden before he looked back down at his wife. His smile turned soft when her hand reached up to hold his that was resting on her shoulder.

"They're giving me back ache,"

Evan started to tap his fingers around the neck of the beer bottle he had in his left hand and he tugged his right arm to pull (Y/n) closer. He itched his chair up until (Y/n) could lean down against his chest and his hand moved from her shoulder towards her neck. His fingers curled and gently brushed across her jaw and chin while he looked around the garden.

"I don't think I can help with that, baby." Evan whispered against the top of her head while (Y/n) curled her fingers around his forearm and snuggled further into his chest.

"They're definitely your kids," (Y/n) didn't have to look up at him to know he was grinning against the top of her head.

Her lips curved into a smile when Evan put his beet down on the table and moved his hand to press against her stomach. It was as if they knew Evan was there when they started to move and wriggle and (Y/n) buried her face into Evan's neck to smother a groan. He had woken them up.

(Y/n) had never seen Evan so animated as she had when she told him she was pregnant. And when they went to their first scan and found out they were having twins, Evan had to sit down before he fainted. He was bubbling over with excitement at finally starting a family and having a kid of his own and now he was getting two at once.

"Yep, those are my girls."

"You don't know that, we might have a boy in here."

"Nope. I'm telling you I've got two girls in there," Evan wiggled his brows and looked down at (Y/n) with a look that was just begging her to egg him on or challenge him here.

"And how do you know that?"

"Intuition."

A quiet chuckle passed (Y/n)'s lips and she shook her head before burrowing back down into Evan's side. "It's called a mother's instincts, not a father's intuition." She mumbled the words beneath her breath, hoping he wouldn't hear her but the playful smack she got on her thigh told her otherwise.

She reached out for his hand and moved it down to the left a little and pressed his palm closer to her stomach so he could feel a kick aiming his way. Evan had taken to talking to the babies and he took it as a response when they kicked and wriggled. But their movements didn't help (Y/n)'s dilemma of back ache and bouts of sickness. (Y/n) had often told Evan off when he came home late from work because if she was asleep, he would start talking to her stomach and wake the twins up. And when they woke up and started to become lively, that was the end of (Y/n)'s sleep.

"Well I think you'll find Hen agrees with me. She's put her vote in,"

"And uh, how much are you gonna win if you're right, Buckley?" Tilting her head a little, (Y/n) pressed a tender kiss just beneath Evan's jaw which sent a shiver rocketing beneath his skin.

(Y/n) knew all about the bets that the 118 team were putting on.

Since she was pregnant, it meant Evan was going to be a dad and Bobby would be a grandfather. The whole team got two chances of getting it right whether the twins would be a girl and a boy or two girls and two boys.

Evan was in full favour of having two girls and Hen, after a long and hard decision, agreed with him.

Bobby was adamant it would be one girl and one boy but (Y/n) wasn't sure if her dad was guessing or whether that was what he was hoping for. Chimney thought it would be one of each as well, and Eddie and Ravi were certain they would have twin boys.

Athena wasn't speculating, she didn't want to give away her guess which she had only shared with (Y/n) and she didn't want to get involved because she knew there would be arguments when (Y/n) finally gave birth. May wasn't speculating either but mainly because she genuinely had no idea and no 'intuition' like everybody else seemed to have.

"At this rate," Evan leaned closer and hovered his lips against her ear, pressing a little kiss there before he continued, "I'll be winning well over a hundred if I'm right."

Almost everyone in the station had put bets on just for the sake of having their say and having a playful, delightful debate between them all. It was just a little game to keep everyone's spirits up which stemmed from Evan and Bobby arguing about their guesses.

But there was one thing that everyone could agree on. These were Evan's kids and that could only mean one thing; double trouble.

"So if you're right, you'll claim intuition, and if my dad's right, he's gonna say he got a tip off from 'the man upstairs'." (Y/n) let her eyes cast up towards the peaceful blue sky before she raised a brow at her husband. Bobby would most definitely hold it over the team if he was right and he would claim to have known the genders due to his faith and favour with God.

"Speaking of him, are you hungry, he's on the barbeque." Evan craned his head over his shoulder to look at the far side of the garden.

They were at Bobby and Athena's place for May's graduation party and the whole station and their families were here for the celebration.

Eddie had kindly given them a lift down so Evan could have a drink and (Y/n) didn't have to drive. Driving at six and a half months was a hard job and she hadn't been feeling well recently. It was hard enough coming here today when all she wanted to do was hide away in bed. But it was her sister's graduation and she wasn't going to stay at hmoe and be a kill joy. She wasn't sick, she was just in discomfort that was going to continue until she gave birth, regardless of where she was.

And (Y/n) was trying to make the most of parties and celebrations while it was still just her and Evan. Soon enough, they would have two children to bring along to parties and gatherings.

"Maybe later," (Y/n) winced, straightening her back out as she tried to swallow down a whimper when her stomach started to churn. They were moving again and this time it was starting to hurt.

She danced her eyes around the garden for a few moments, taking note of where everyone was and what was going on. Eddie and Chris were inside taking pictures, Athena was in the kitchen sorting the last of the food and her dad was cooking on the barbeque, his speciality. May was somewhere inside as well and (Y/n) had promised to take some photos with her soon.

"Don't forget May wants some pictures soon," Evan mumbled each word against the top of (Y/n)'s head but his eyes were focused on looking through the patio doors in front of them. He could see May weaving through the people inside and both Eddie and Chris were making the most of the selfie props laid out in front of the back drop.

"With me in the middle looking like an elephant?" She spoke before she could think better of it and she regretted her words when Evan tensed beside her.

"Hey, don't say that." His arm tightened around her shoulders and his left hand moved from her stomach to cup her chin, tilting her head up off his shoulder so they were level. "You're pregnant, there's a difference. And you look beautiful so yes you need to be in the pictures."

"Thank you,"

(Y/n) smiled but she wasn't sure if it properly hid the grimace clawing its way onto her face. Her stomach was tensing up again now that one or even both the twins were moving.

"Could you help me up? I feel like my back's gonna seize up again." She hated to ask but if she didn't, she wouldn't get herself up from this chair alone.

She needed the toilet but she had been sat down for far too long. (Y/n) knew better than to sit somewhere for more than half an hour or she had a new tendency to lock in place and moving became unbearable after that. But time had run away from her and she had been comfy. Getting herself up was a struggle in itself without being in a crowd where people might tend to stare at her.

Last night her back had been so sore it seized up and it took Evan almost twenty minutes to help her off the sofa. Every time he went to help her up, a crippling pain shot down her back and she couldn't move. That was the last thing (Y/n) wanted right now, to cause a scene and embarrass herself in front of her family if she couldn't get up from a garden chair without some sort of agony.

She had purposely chosen to sit outside because the sofas inside were too low and she would never get up even with Evan's help.

She moved her hands to grip the metal arms of the chair and inched forwards onto the edge of the chair. Her back clicked into place and she couldn't hide her whimper when she tried to move.

"Come on then baby," Evan's voice softened around the edges and he pushed up out of his seat first so he could squeeze past the table and stand in front of (Y/n). He could see the debate in her eyes, she didn't want him to pull her up and have people watch but they both knew he couldn't exactly push her up without hurting her so pulling was the way to go.

He held his hands out in front of him and when (Y/n) gripped his forearms, his fingers curled around her elbows and he eased her up, tensing his arms and locking his elbows. He didn't want to drag her up too quickly and hurt her, Evan was used to lifting weights and although (Y/n) believed she was heavy, she really wasn't.

Once she was up, Evan slid his hands from her elbows around to her waist and he stepped forward while her hands moved to grip his shoulders. She didn't let him go or try to move, she just stayed motionless in front of him and tilted her head forward into his chest. He could feel her breaths fanning through his shirt as she inhaled his scent and squeezed his shoulders to let him know she was alright.

"Baby," He drawled out quietly with a gentle smile and his thumbs brushed up and down her hips while he waited. "If you wanted a hug you could of said so," His lips pressed to the top of her head and he gave her hips a squeeze as he grinned into her hair when he felt her smile into his chest.

With a deep breath, (Y/n) uncurled herself from around Evan and straightened up, pecking his lips before she moved to go inside.

She kept her head down as she passed by the living room, avoiding her little sister so May didn't try and drag her in for any photos just yet. She would gladly pose for one or two quick photos later when she felt more herself. With Evan next to her.

A forced grin rose to her lips as she passed Chris and Eddie and she reached out to ruffle Chris's hair as they passed one another before she finally got to the bathroom that was luckily vacant.

A tender smile flitted across Evan's face when he spun round on his heels and almost bumped into Athena. With his parents being who they were and halfway across the country, Bobby and Athena had practically become his parents as well as his inlaws. They were the parents he always wished he'd grown up with.

"Everything okay, have you eaten yet?" She leaned behind him to place a bowl of crisps down on the table, a knowing look in her eyes. She knew whenever they had a gathering that Evan would always be the first one to try the food and tell her how good it was. He was the first at the table before the food was even put down.

"Not yet… is (Y/n) inside? I think she's gone wandering," Evan glanced at his watch before he looked back down at Athena and tried to calm down the nerves building in his stomach. He didn't want to hover or be overprotective but (Y/n) had been a while and he didn't think there had been a queue for the bathroom.

Either she was hiding away from everyone to gain some peace and a moment to herself, or she was wandering around aimlessly inside. Either way, Evan would rather be next to her than stood out here like a statue, unsure what to do with himself without her.

"I haven't seen her, I'll have a look," Athena rested her hand on his shoulder before she turned on her heels and headed back inside.

She glanced into the kitchen but she knew (Y/n) wasn't there since she had just been there with the last of the food to be taken outside. Her eyes glanced around the selfie corner but (Y/n) wasn't there, not that Athena expected her to be. She knew (Y/n) wasn't keen on photos at the moment and no one could blame her. Nor was she sat on the sofa or out at the back.

Athena passed down towards the bedrooms, peeking in her and Bobby's room even though she knew (Y/n) wouldn't be in there unless she was desperate for some space to herself. The bathroom door was locked, that was the only logical place (Y/n) could be unless she secretly left the party.

"(Y/n), honey are you in there? I think Buck feels a little lost without you hun," Her words were followed by a light chuckle as she tapped her knuckles on the door while her free hand curled around her hip. She leaned her shoulder on the doorframe but the smile on her lips started to fade when she didn't receive an answer.

"Athena?"

"Honey are you alright?" She didn't like the way (Y/n) croaked her name. Her voice sounded broken and it was unnerving and very worrying.

With a deep breath, Athena tried the door handle and was flooded with relief when she realise it was unlocked. She didn't want to intrude, but she had a very bad feeling in the pit of her stomach that was hardly ever wrong. She opened the door slowly and leaned her head around, not wanting to barge right in incase (Y/n) didn't want her inside.

"Hey, what's wrong?" When she wasn't asked to get out, she gingerly moved inside and quietly shut the door behind her to give them some privacy.

She wasn't expecting to see (Y/n) sat on the floor.

(Y/n) sniffed, rubbing her eyes with the back of her hand that was starting to tremble. She was sat on the floor with her back leaning up against the bath. Her legs were curled beneath her and her arms were bound around her chest, resting on her stomach. Tears stained her cheeks and were starting to make her eyes swell.

She looked up when Athena knelt down in front of her and reached out to take her hand. Her smile was calming, she always had a soothing manner about her and she had become the mother (Y/n) hadn't had in years.

"What's happened, hm?"

(Y/n)'s lower lip started to wobble and when she looked up at Athena, she felt another wave of tears falling as a shudder passed through her.

"I d-don't feel well and… and I'm bleeding," Her eyes darted down to her legs and back up a few times until Athena caught onto her silent message.

When she got to the bathroom, (Y/n) felt a little sick but she chalked it down to needing something to eat. It wasn't until she sat down that she realised there was blood in her underwear, and more than just a little spotting. She didn't know what to do. Twinges rocked through her stomach and silent tears started to fall and the only thing (Y/n) could think to do was sit on the floor and wait in vain.

She wasn't sure if she was waiting for the pain to disappear or for a bout of couorage so she could go and talk to Evan, but whatever she had been waiting for hadn't arrived yet. It was a relief that Athena rocked up when she did because if not, (Y/n) was sure she would have stayed locked up in the bathroom until people started looking for her.

"A lot?" When (Y/n) nodded, Athena rolled her lips together and squeezed her hand. "I'll go find Hen-"

"No! No I- no," She didn't want anyone else but Evan coming in here and seeing her like this.

They were at a party. The last thing (Y/n) wanted was for someone she thought of as a friend to see her in this state and try to assess her just to tell her to go to hospital. (Y/n) wasn't going to bend the rules of friendship, she loved the 118 as her family and she didn't want any of them seeing her in any state of distress. It wasn't fair. They would look at her differently and it was embarrassing.

"Then I'll get your dad and Buck, we can take you to get checked out. Stay put, honey."

With a quick kiss to (Y/n)'s temple, Athena brushed her cheek before she got up and left the bathroom, making sure to shut the door behind her so no one else stumbled upon (Y/n) and bothered her.

It wasn't hard to find Bobby and Evan when they were both stood next to the barbeque. Each with a burger in one hand and their respective drinks in the other. They almost looked like father and son when they stood side by side, laughing over whatever joke they had heard. Athena could still see the way Bobby had smiled with tears in his eyes when they found out Evan had proposed to (Y/n).

This was the boy who had easily wormed his way into Bobby's heart and became a son to him. When they got married, it was just another reason for Bobby to look at Evan and see a son in him.

"Did you find (Y/n)?" Evan put his burger back down on his plate and swiped his hand up and down his jeans to rid any crumbs or sauce. He had already been told by Chris that he had sauce around his mouth two minutes ago.

"I did…" Evan didn't like the way Athena moved closer to them and lowered her voice almost suspiciously. "She's not feeling well, I think we might need to take her to a doctor."

"A doctor? W-"

"Where is she?" Evan slammed his beer bottle down on the side of the barbeque and turned to bolt even before Athena told him where his wife was. He knew she had been gone too long. He knew he should have gone looking for her to make sure she was okay. He suspected something wasn't right when she kept fidgeting all day and tried to pass it off as feeling tired.

He could feel Bobby's hand on his shoulder when they followed Athena inside like they were part of her team at work, acting as her back up going into a bad situation. They followed her inside, past May and her friends taking photos in the corner and disappeared round the corner until the boys realised (Y/n) had to be in the bathroom.

Athena bit back a huff when Evan bypassed her, almost pushing her back so he could get into the bathroom first like it was a race, but she didn't say anything. She couldn't blame him.

"Baby, baby what's going on?" Evan plonked himself down on the edge of the bathtub, gripping the sides when he almost slid back into the tub. He arched his knees out and hunched his shoulders forward. He reached his left hand out to rub up and down (Y/n)'s back, feeling one of his many nerves calm down somewhat when (Y/n) let her head flop onto his knee.

One of her hands clenched into her thigh while her other arm wrapped around the back of Evan's leg so she could tuck herself up against him.

"Sweetheart, what's wrong?" Bobby knelt down in front of her and stretched a hand out to rub up and down her arm. He could feel Athena standing behind him with her hand on his shoulder and it felt like they were having some weird, secret meeting in his bathroom.

"She's had a bit of blood and cramps… if you two want to take her to get checked over I'll stay and keep an eye on the party." Athena could see that (Y/n) didn't want to make a fuss and she wouldn't want the party to stop or pause if she and Evan had to leave.

Evan couldn't drive, he didn't have the jeep and he'd been drinking which meant Bobby would need to take them. And Athena knew her husband wouldn't stay home at the party if his daughter wasn't well, he would want to be with her and make sure she was okay.

"We'll take you sweetheart, you'll be fine."

"Come on baby, let's get you up."

Crouching behind her, Evan slipped his hands beneath her arms ready to lift her up because he could see she was in no state to get up and possibly not even walk like this. He felt her right arm reach up and curl around the back of his neck, trying to both hold onto him and give them each some reassurance. He tucked his face into the crook of her neck and pressed a gentle kiss there while Bobby firmly held her free hand and her elbow to help lift her up.

(Y/n) let most of her weight fall back onto Evan and he lifted her up with ease, holding her back up against his chest as his chin pressed down into her shoulder. His hands slid down to wrap around her middle, resting on her stomach that was still tense and shifting from the twins movements. And he pressed his elbows into her waist to keep her upright and make sure he had most of her weight for her.

He tried to walk her forwards with Bobby on their left for added support and Athena in front of them, ready to shield them so they didn't gain much unwanted attention. But Evan stopped dead when (Y/n)'s knees bent and she slid down an inch or two.

"Woah, baby, hey it's okay-"

"No, no Evan," Her voice trembled and her fingers momentairely dug into the back of Evan's neck so tightly he was sure she had drawn blood and left indents in his skin. But then her hand was gone from his neck and she slid down him even further until he had to dig his hands into her skin to hold her properly.

(Y/n) tightened her left hand around her dad's while her right hand started to tremble and rubbed between her thighs. She slowly pulled her hand away from her legs, letting out a bubbling cry when she saw blood drenching her palm.

She was bleeding again.

When Evan's eyes locked on her hand that was held out for them all to see, he lifted his head from her shoulder. His pupils blew wide, looking between Athena and Bobby who stood paralysed with raised brows and parted yet silent lips.

"Sweetheart, it's alright. This is just a little complication and it could be nothing serious. Let's get you in the car and take you to a doctor, okay?" Bobby's voice was oddly soothing and his tone was one Evan recognised. It was how he talked to patients when they were out on the job.

It was the voice he used to calm down kids when their parents were in accidents or parents when they were hurt and separated from their children.

And he was right. She was having twins, that doubled the risk for complications and illnesses and problems arising. So far (Y/n) had only suffered with very prolonged morning sickness. This might just be a complication they had to work through, she might be overdoing things and need to go on bed rest. It could very well be nothing serious and Bobby saw no need to panic until they knew exactly what was happening.

***

"You've had a placental abruption, the placenta has moved quite far down and caused the bleeding."

(Y/n) looked between her dad and her husband, wishing she could stop trembling but she had been shaking since the moment they got in the car.

"So how do you treat that?" Evan didn't know what that meant. None of the calls he had been on had ever had this occur and he wasn't a paramedic, he hadn't trained for anything like this. Nor had he ever trained to be a doctor like Hen. This was all new to Evan and he didn't like it.

He stood at (Y/n)'s side, both arms folded over his chest and his thumb pressed against his lips as he bit down and started to peel away a layer of skin. He could feel (Y/n)'s hand gripping his jean pocket to try and ground herself and keep some sense of control that was slipping away from them both.

Evan couldn't see how Bobby could sit there and look so calm. He had his hands clasped together, his elbows resting on his knees and his chin propped up on his hands. All he needed was his rosary and he would look like he was praying in church. He hadn't uttered a word since they arrived.

"We induce labour."

"What?!"

"No, no you can't do that- Evan," The way (Y/n)'s pleading eyes looked up at him made him quiver and he could feel tears burning in the corner of his eyes.

"We're only… what, thirty one weeks? You can't make her go into labour now it's way too early,"

It wouldn't be safe to make (Y/n) go into labour now, surely there was something else they could do to help them. Couldn't they keep (Y/n) in hospital for observation? Put her on bed rest? Give her some medication to stop the bleeding and keep a check on the twins? Surely waiting another few weeks would be safer than having them now.

"The placenta's moved too much, the bleeding will only get worse the longer we wait and the babies will be distressed. Labour is your only safe option. They will be taken straight to the ICU, they will have a very good chance of being okay."

Her words were supposed to be comforting but they felt condescending.

Evan didn't want a good chance, he wanted a definite, one hundred percent chance of his twins being alright. This wasn't fair, what kind of choice were they being given? Give birth and maybe have the twins be okay or wait and lose them for sure.

"We can inject some steroids into their lungs now to speed up growth, and then give another dose once they're born so their breathing won't be affected."

Evan dropped his arms from his chest and moved down to grab (Y/n)'s hand, coiling her hand up until it was pressed against his lips. He could feel his breathing running away from him and he felt like he was going to be sick.

He moved closer to the bed and tried to be out the midwife's way when a nurse entered the room with a medicine trolley. And Bobby stood to his feet on (Y/n)'s other side, taking her free hand when she started to tremble again. She didn't like needles. Two babies meant two injections.

"Okay, try and stay as still as you can, this is going to go into baby's lungs."

(Y/n) shook her head before she turned to the left and pressed her face into Evan's thigh, trying her best to tense up and become as still as if she were dead. She didn't want to see that needle because it was bigger than any injection she'd ever had to have before. She could feel Evan's free hand move to cup the back of her head and his fingers tangled into her hair, keeping he tucked up against him. While Bobby ran a hand up and down her arm, still holding her other hand so she couldn't move away or accidentally lash out when the pain started.

Evan's upper lip crinkled and he held his breath while the midwife held the sonogram in place to show baby A's chest, allowing the nurse to get the needle prepared and in the right place. He turned his attention to the monitor when (Y/n)'s breath shuddered through his jeans and she whimpered against him. It was suddenly so strange to see a thin white line appear on the screen and it looked horrid when the needle pressed into his baby's lungs.

They shouldn't have to go through this, none of them. It wasn't right. Evan thought they would have another month, maybe even two before they had to think about premature labour. Everything had been going so well until now.

The second injection made (Y/n)'s shoulders pull inwards and she could feel her stomach churning as bile rose at the back of her throat.

They were going to make her have her babies now. The twins weren't going to be safe anymore, they would be in danger. They might not be okay.

***

She wanted it all to stop. She wanted to go back home and be wrapped up in bed with Evan and forget this was happening. (Y/n) was supposed to have weeks to prepare herself mentally and physically for this and all she had were a few measly hours to get ready.

Her nails dug into Evan's arm that was wrapped around her front and she leaned forward, feeling Evan's chest pressing up into her back like he was trying to merge them together. His lips smothered her burning neck and she could feel him smiling into her skin when the nurse finally spoke.

"Baby A is a little girl."

His bet was starting to pay off already, their first baby was a girl just like Evan had predicted. And (Y/n) could feel him muttering something into her neck but she couldn't hear him over the pounding of her pulse throbbing in her ears. The next baby would be the tie breaker, if it was a girl, Evan was right. If it was a boy, Bobby would be right.

"Baby B is ready, lets have another push (Y/n)."

(Y/n) tensed her knees a little more and lifted them closer to her stomach as if it would give her more momentum when she pushed. She had been sick twice since they gave her an injection to push her into labour and she could feel her stomach churning again.

"You're doing great sweetheart," Bobby smoothed her hair behind her ear and leaned forward to kiss her temple.

He had called Athena to let her know what was happening and that he was staying when both Evan and his daughter pleaded with him not to go anywhere. They didn't want to be doing this alone. Athena was supposed to be here, she was (Y/n)'s other birthing partner besides Evan and right now, they needed all the support and faith they could get.

"Is s-she okay?" (Y/n) opened her eyes enough to look up at her dad who hadn't sat down for the last hour or so. He was stood at the side of the bed, gripping her hand so tightly she couldn't feel her fingers anymore while Evan was sat behind her on the bed.

"She's alright sweetheart, their cleaning her up. Come on, almost there now." His thumb brushed across her cheek as he briefly glanced across the other side of the room.

No one had heard a cry yet, but they weren't exactly expecting one right now. Her airways were being cleared and she was being cleaned up and looked after. Bobby could see the nurse extracting fluids from his granddaughter's lungs but she wasn't panicking or going through methods to get her to breathe which was a very good sign.

“Shoulders are born, keep pushing and they will be here in no time. We’re almost there, just keep doing little breaths now.”

Over the past few months (Y/n) had imagined and dreamt of this moment, part of her had even been prepared for a C-section since the midwife said it was a possibility with twins. But now it felt like all her energy had gone and she had nothing left to give to her second baby. And they weren't even fully developed yet which meant they were much smaller than they would be if she were going through labour in a few months.

Their twins were going to be tiny compared to what they should be.

"I love you so much,"

Her fingers squeezed Evan's arm and she tilted her head back enough to kiss his cheek as a round of tremors rattled through her and made Evan shake behind her.

She could feel their second baby, small, motionless and helpless between her legs. They were smaller than they should have been and it made it quicker to push but (Y/n) hated it and the thought made her scream harder.

Her chin pressed down into her chest and she bit down on her lip as she let out a scream with the last push. Her head dropped back onto Evan's shoulder and she let herself go limp in his arms, seeing stars before her eyes and air pumping into her head that was going to explode. Breathing was now a struggle, her lungs were maxed out and she couldn't gain back enough air to keep her body working.

She didn't realise she was crying until she felt Evan's lips pressing to the top of her head and he started to sway them side to side to soothe her and calm her down.

"Another girl,"

"I knew it! What did I tell you, hm?" (Y/n)'s cries turned into breathless gasps and she managed a smile at Evan's words. He pressed repeated kisses to the side of her head and rubbed his nose against her cheek, squeezing her sides tight.

"W-where… where are they going?"

"Nurse is taking them down to the ICU to get them stabalised and give them more steroids. Once you are all taken care of, you can go down to visit them."

"No, n- dad, dad please?" (Y/n) tugged on her dad's hand, pulling him closer until he almost fell down on the bed with them.

"I'll go with them until you can go see them, they're gonna be just fine don't you worry." His arm curved around her back and his other hand pressed to her chin so he could kiss the top of her head. He smiled into her hair as tears streaked down his face. He would gladly follow his granddaughters and keep watch over them until his daughter was well enough to see them. He kissed her head again before his eyes locked with Evan. "Look after her."

Evan nodded blindly, pulling (Y/n) closer into his chest as he watched Bobby wipe his eyes on the back of his sleeve as he moved to open the door. He waited patiently for two nurses to rush out the room with his two granddaughters, then he followed swiftly behind them. Bobby wouldn't let them out of his sight, he would hover like a guardian angel and report back to the couple if anything changed.

"Our girls will be fine baby, just you wait and see."

#evan buckley #buck imagine #buck x reader #evan buckley x reader #evan buckley imagine #imagine #911 imagine #pregnant! reader #pregnancy #bobby nash

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chrissdollie · 4 months

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a chaotic morning in the sturniolo household (not edited)

three of your kids sit at the table shoving breakfast into their hungry mouths. you walk over with more food, placing it down in front of them. "momma, i'm gonna be lateee!" your youngest boy whines, shoving another pancake down his throat. you head to a nearby mirror, fixing your makeup while you sigh. "josh baby, can't larissa's mommy take you to practice?"

joshua pouts at his twin brother for snatching the syrup out of his hands, not hearing your words. priscilla, sitting next to him, taps his arm gently to bring back his focus. "uhh no, she has a doctor's appointment!" he exclaims loudly, you shushing him softly after. "inside voices-- junior you're going to be late!" you yell down the hall to your eldest child. richie drops his fork onto his plate, wiping his sticky mouth with a sleeved arm. "oh mommy, chris got in trouble yesterday." he snitches, a conniving grin on his face. you pause on your lipgloss, turning your head to look back at your son.

"what kind of trouble?" you frown, raising an eyebrow. "a referral in mrs. bloom's class." junior walks out of his room with his backpack lazily slung over one shoulder. he fixes his messy brown hair out of his face before heading to the table to eat. "why?" your voice goes up a pitch. at that moment, your husband finally comes out of your shared bedroom, dressed and needing some coffee. "hi, honey." he stands behind you, wrapping his arms around your waist. you smile lovingly before kissing (not really because you didn't want to mess up your fresh coat of gloss) his cheek and putting your makeup back into your purse.

"g'morning daddy! junior got a referral." richie smirks, his older brother shoving his arm as he does. priscilla takes her copy of 'the bell jar' off the table, getting off her chair and handing you field trip slip to sign. chris walks over to the coffee pot with raised eyebrows. "what happened bud?" he asks, wanting to hear his son out instead of making assumptions. his mini-me sighs, bouncing his leg under the table. "well it was in mrs. bloom's--" his dad cuts him off with a, "lady with the big bazoongas? ion really like her.."

"christopher." you snap your head away from your daughter to warn him. you give the slip back to priscilla, handing her pretty pink pen back as well. "guys we're already ten minutes late, lets go!" you call out, picking up your keys again. richard groans, "mommy can i go in your car??" he folds his arms with a sad frown, unconsciously grabbing onto his twin's shirt sleeve like a baby. your husband sits down next to him, putting his mug onto the table. "sorry dude, ya gotta come with me today, josh has soccer practice." he ruffles his boy's hair before patting his shoulder. priscilla pops up behind her dad after putting her stuff into her clean bag.

"hi daddy." she kisses his cheek sweetly. he smiles happily, always appreciative of his daughter's lovingness to her dad as a pre-teen. weird, isnt it? "mornin' sweetpea-" he starts. "junior, you can take it in the car, let's go!!" you clap your hands in a rush. the boy scoffs, shoving a pancake into his mouth to hold on to while he picks up his backpack from the floor. joshua gets up with him, hugging his brother before wrapping his arms around his dad's neck. "cya kiddos, make good choices!" chris dismisses, slapping both of their backs as they exit the house. you run into the dining room, holding richie's head as you give his hair a peck before smooching your husband. he dirtily tugs on your bottom lip with a small, quiet sigh when you pull back with a warning look.

"byebye scilla, remember to ask gianna about this weekend." you kiss your only daughter's cheek before opening the front door. "love you guys!" you yell out, hesitantly waiting for the response before stepping out. "love you momma!" richard and priscilla shout, followed by an "i love you sexy!" from your stupid husband. you giggle before shutting the door. "SHOTGUN!" junior shouts at the top of his lungs, the three hearing him from inside. "shut up!!" you whisper-yell.

weird ass shitty ass ending i know but remember this is not edited dont yell at me ty xx @leah-loves-lilies @imtalkinnonsense @star-sturn @junnniiieee07 @mattsneezing @freshloveee@freshsturns@emma4eva @r6diosturns @matthasmywholeheart @donthugmeimhot @blahbel668 @chrissturnsss @joanofarcily @mattscoquette @slutsturn @sturnioloremarker @ashley9282828 @jnkvivi @sturncakez @lanasturn @riasturns @st7rnioioss @strnlxlqve @starlace111

#𝓬𝓱𝓻𝓲𝓼 𝓼𝓽𝓾𝓻𝓷𝓲𝓸𝓵𝓸 #sturniolo triplets #chris sturniolo #sturniolo #christopher sturniolo #chris sturniolo x reader

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rainydayathogwarts · 3 months

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Hey hey, I absolutely love your writing. If you're still open to requests, I would love prompt 6 w/ Ron!! Tysm <333

6. Wiping away leftover lipgloss from their lips after kissing them.

Ron's grip tightened on your hips, a muffled groan leaving his lips when you press your chest against his snuggly, raising yourself onto your tippy toes to fetch another kiss from him. Your boyfriend was trapped between your body and the dresser behind him, not that he was complaining at all. Ron titled his head downwards, opening his mouth slightly to deepen the kiss, extracting a quiet moan from you, as your arms reached up to wrap over his shoulders, pulling him even closer to you.

The big hands on your hips loosened their grip on you, instead having arms snaking around your waist to tug you close in a suffocating hug. Ron's lips separated from yours as he dug his head in the crook of your neck, resorting to pressing kisses there instead, which had you squirming in his grip, one of your hands winding in his red hair, tugging him upwards to connect your lips back to his desperately. The second your lips reconnect in another kiss, a loud pop is heard in the room and you immediately push yourself off your boyfriend, spinning in his arms towards the location of the sound.

"Well this is exactly why Hermione didn't want to come up here herself, isn't it Georgie?" The two tall gingers stand in the room with their arms crossed and looks of feigned disappointment on their faces. "You are exactly right Freddie my boy." Replies the taller of the pair, shaking his head. "What?" You retort, confused. "Uh Hermione says you promised to have breakfast with her this morning while you finished the story?" You scoff, turning back to face your boyfriend, grabbing a fistful of his jumper to pull his down to your level, pressing your lips against his for a final kiss.

You take your time to kiss him despite the loud groans and pop slam of a door opening while the twins trudge out of the room, separating yourself from Ron to cup his face in your hand, thumb softly wiping the corner of his lips to try getting rid of the sticky lip gloss residue. Ron does the same, one hand cradling your cheek, the other one mimicking your movements. You grin up at him, letting your hand fall to his chest before patting him twice and spinning on your heels just in time to hear Hermione calling your name loudly.

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dwobbitfromtheshire · 3 months

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CHOOSE YOUR OWN ROMANCE

Pre-season 4. Do you think Robin had Steve do the twin thing and go into school to take a test for her? She was sick as a dog and didn't know what she was asking him, but she was his platonic soulmate, and he loved her. Plus, it was his day off, and he was bored. So, he dresses up as her: wig, makeup, and all. No one notices. . .until a certain class she shares with Eddie, and he's like. . . ??? He doesn't give Steve away, though. Vickie clocks him immediately and makes up an excuse for him not to play. Steve managed to avoid Mike, Dustin, and Lucas because he never would have heard the end of it. . .or did he? When Mike sat down at lunch, he asked Dustin why Steve was here dressed at Robin. . .Dustin immediately pulled his first kid out and tried to take his temperature.

"Mike! Hold still! You're sick. . .because why would STEVE BE HERE DRESSED AS ROBIN!"

Later, Steve does run into Chrissy, but it doesn't phase her. They used to hang out back in the day along with Nancy. Also, they used to play dress up when they were little, and their parents ran in the same circles. Eventually, he does run into Nancy, who's also unbiased because they used to share lipgloss when they were together. They'd greet each other so casually, and Nancy would guess that he's bored on his day off.

Anyway. . .this is up for grabs. Choose who anyone wants to be with or insert yourself or an original character. This is for anyone. . .and for multiple people to write different versions.

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humanpurposes · 11 months

Text

It Will Come Back

Chapter 1, You Know Better

Two sides of a family fight for their own claims to the Targaryen inheritance. Amongst the endless infighting, forced pleasantries and PR scandals, Jaya Velaryon finds herself face to face with a demon of her past, namely Aemond Targaryen. Love and hate are not emotions easily unlearned.

Series Masterlist // Main Masterlist

Aemond Targaryen x Jaya Velaryon (OFC)

Warnings: 18+, dark elements, targcest (uncle x niece relationship) toxic family dynamics, drinking, recreational drug use, manipulation (I guess?)

Words: 5800

A/n: Please make sure you read the warnings. If any of this stuff makes you uncomfortable feel free to give it a miss 🫶 Also serves as my (very very late) entry for Week 1 of the literary prompts for @hotd-bigbang

“He’s more myself than I am. Whatever our souls are made of, his and mine are the same.” -Wuthering Heights

6 years earlier...

Jaya leaned on her shoulder against the wall by the side door, waiting as inconspicuously as she could despite the fact she was dressed in a black crop top, skirt and pumps. Clearly, she had no intention of spending the evening at home.

She shifted her weight on her feet, pulled at the hem of her crop top and checked the pocket of her black denim jacket; pocket mirror, lipgloss, eyeliner, and the vintage lighter Aemond had slipped into her hands a few months ago. Every time she tried to give it back he wouldn’t take it. She smiled to herself as she traced her thumb over the engraving of a three headed dragon in the silver plating. He said he had found it in his father’s study years ago, but Viserys had enough of them to not notice that one had gone missing, apparently.

She froze when she heard footsteps coming down the stairs and through the hallway. They were too light to be Laenor’s, too quick to be Rhaenyra’s, too cautious to be Luke or Joff.

Jace appeared through the archway, a red blazer thrown over his shoulder, his shirt untucked and unbuttoned at the top to show off two chains, one gold, one silver. His perfectly white sneakers hardly made a sound against the hardwood floors. He tutted when he saw her.

“What?” she said, tightening her grip on the lighter in her pocket.

“Nothing,” he mumbled. “Let’s just get this over with.”

Jaya had a few memories of their apartments at the Red Keep. She considered the humbly named Queen’s Lodge to be the only home she had ever known. The house sat on a large estate in the corner of Queen’s Park, not too far from the centre of King’s Landing, but removed from the noise and chaos of the city. The front looked out over immaculately kept gardens while the back of the house was for leisure, the patio, the pool and the tennis court beyond that. The side door Jaya and Jace found themselves passing through every Friday night led out to a small orchard of apple trees.

Summer was fast approaching but the night air was far from warm. Once Jace had locked the door from the inside latch and pocketed the spare key, Jaya led him down the barely visible path, down to a denser grove of older, taller trees, to the iron fence that bordered the entire estate. Jace hoisted her up and over the fence before clambering after her.

Where the daylight saw countless people passing through the park, the Velaryon twins walked through darkness and silence along the boardwalk, down to the gates that were locked every day at sunset.

Well, almost silence. Jace walked a few paces behind his sister, huffing and sighing pointedly.

“You don’t have to come if you don’t want to,” Jaya said over her shoulder, a fact she reminded him of every week.

“I’m not going to let you go alone,” Jace said.

She tried to appreciate the intention, but having him dragging his feet behind her, constantly complaining when he could just stay home was frankly getting exhausting.

“I won’t be alone,” she said, checking the last few texts on her phone.

The first read, Here.

Which was soon followed by, Hurry up. It’s fucking cold :)

Jaya giggled to herself and looked ahead. The gate was coming into view now, and so were the two girls waiting by it.

They were both dressed in black, Sabby in a mini dress trimmed with lace, Alyssane in flared jeans, a Vivienne Westwood top and a pearl necklace.

“Did you not think to bring a jacket, Sabs?” Jaya grinned as Jace helped her over the gate.

“It’s strategic,” Alysanne said, “she’ll complain she’s cold and some cool, sexy economics student will offer her his jacket.”

“Politics,” Sabby said, reaching to help Jaya as she slipped down. “Gods, you must be the first person to ever say ‘cool’, ‘sexy’ and ‘economics student’ in the same sentence.”

From the park it was only a short walk to the bus stop, and a matter of minutes until they reached Conquest Street. Jaya loved it, the energy buzzing in the streets as they passed the pubs and bars, music pulsing from every direction, people laughing and shouting to make themselves heard.

From there she knew the way to Maegor’s Square without thinking. A few people lingered around the garden at the centre of the square and some leaned over the balconies in their aparments, smoking cigarettes and sipping expensive booze from mismatched glasses.

Then they came to the townhouse on the corner, with the emerald green door and the gold knocker in the shape of a dragon’s head. A bit on the nose, but their family were hardly known for their subtlety.

“I can’t believe you got us an invite to one of Aegon’s parties,” Alysanne hissed excitedly into her ear.

It was nothing really, Aegon wasn’t picky about the company he kept, and if anything, he liked picking up waifs and strays.

Jaya smiled as she checked her makeup in her pocket mirror. “Well, I am his favourite niece,” she said, smudging out the eyeliner in the corners of her eyes.

“You’re his only niece,” Jace grumbled.

“Exactly, no room for competition,” Jaya said, before applying another swipe of red lipgloss over her lips. “How do I look?” she asked the three of them.

Alysanne and Sabby immediately responded with praise that just seemed to float through her.

Jace tilted his head. For a moment Jaya thought she saw pity in her brother’s eyes.

“Beautiful,” he said, “you’re always beautiful.”

Jaya tutted. She didn’t mean her, she meant the makeup.

She tapped the knocker four times before being greeted by a haze of smoke, the smell of liquor and a slow psychedelic rock song playing from another room. The door had been opened by Arryk Cargyll, one of Aegon’s uni friends. He had a glass of clear liquid and ice in his hand and a cigarette hanging in the corner of his mouth. He hugged Jaya tightly and she beamed back, making a point to ask about his upcoming internship at Lannister Legal. He seemed impressed that she had remembered.

“Third year law,” she said to Alysanne and Sabby. “And he has a twin brother, Erryk. Politics,” she added with a wink. The girls giggled.

Jace settled for a quick handshake and a nod.

“Friends from school?” Arryk asked as he greeted the girls.

“Yeah, we’re all at Peremore’s,” Alysanne said, slotting herself beside him with a well-practised smile. They had another few weeks of classes before their final exams, but they all had their university applications confirmed.

Arryk led them through the bodies lingering in the hallway, into the kitchen and Alysanne began the usual routine of telling him what she studied– Politics, Psychology and Literature– and her plans to do Law at Vale. Sabby looked a little sour.

Jaya made herself at home, leaning against the black marble countertop, grinning to herself as Arryk suggested opening a bottle of champagne. He poured out four glasses, keeping one for himself, handing one each to Sabby and Alysanne. He went to give the fourth to Jaya then looked to Jace with a look of embarrassment.

“It’s fine,” Jace said shortly, “I’ll get myself a beer–”

“Jacey boy!” a theatrical voice called as the double glass door to the garden swung open. Aegon Targaryen swept into the room with a cold breeze, slapping his hand down on his nephew’s shoulder.

Jaya briefly glanced around the room, searching for another head of silver hair. Her heart sank a little when she didn’t find it.

The angles of Aegon’s face made him look severe, especially when he smiled, but it was countered by his wide violet eyes with a softer, sadder look. He looked at Jaya, with a firm hand on Jace’s shoulder, and smiled. She smiled back.

“Made it at last,” Aegon said as Jace shrugged him off. “I thought you two were getting here early.”

“No I told you,” Jaya said, nodding to her friends, “I brought guests.”

Aegon could turn charm on like a switch. His voice suddenly took on a richer tone as he introduced himself to the girls, shaking their hands and pressing light kisses to their knuckles.

Jace plucked a green bottle from the fridge and began to drink, scowling at everyone between sips.

“Could you at least look like you’re having fun?” Jaya muttered into his ear as he settled beside her against the counter.

“What’s fun about this?” he replied.

She supposed she knew what he meant. These parties weren’t always as exciting as she wanted them to be, watching other people get wasted, sitting through not-entirely-sober lectures from Aegon’s friends, which really just felt like they were getting off to the sound of their own voices. It could be quite intimidating sometimes, but this was just how adults had fun.

She had this vision that one day something would just click. All the boring parts of parties would seem fun, the drinks wouldn’t taste as strong, the mindless small talk with people she didn’t know would make sense, the music wouldn’t feel so loud.

For now she had her own reason for coming to Maegor’s Square every Friday night.

Her heart hummed when she heard footsteps coming from the hallway. A few voices muttered vague greetings which were met by a distant “hmm.”

“Why haven’t you got a drink yet, Jaya?” Aegon asked and she realised she had yet to take the champagne from Arryk.

Suddenly the footsteps stopped and a thrill slipped down her spine. Someone was looming behind her. She could feel his breath on her neck and the heat radiating from his body.

“She’ll have some of this,” a low but soft voice said, holding out a glass of red wine in front of her. She recognised his hand, the veins and the tendons prominent underneath pale skin. The silver signet ring on his little finger, engraved with a three headed dragon. The scent of his perfume, woody and green, lingering with the smell of tobacco.

Jaya took the glass with her fingertips, trying to hide her delight as she turned over her shoulder to face him. Aemond gazed down at her with a gentle look in his blue eyes and the corners of his mouth curled into a small smile.

“What is it?” she asked, bringing it to her lips.

“It’s Dornish,” he said, “you’ll like it.”

She wasn’t sure if she liked it, so much as she could swallow it without wincing, but Aemond always seemed so happy when she liked the things he gave her. His eyes were fixed on her face as she took three small sips, and wiped away the red imprint of her lipgloss on the rim. It was sour and it left a slight burn on her tongue. She muttered an apology about the lipgloss but he didn’t seem to mind, drinking from the other side of the glass when he took it back.

She kept her back to the others as Aegon, Arryk and the girls all became better acquainted. She stayed as close to Aemond as she dared, her chest a few inches from his, her neck craning to look up at him even with her heels.

“I missed you while you were away,” she said, fighting the urge to fiddle with the fabric of her skirt or the polished surface of her red painted nails.

Aemond’s mother liked to whisk her children away every year for a few weeks around spring break, usually to join the rest of the Hightower family at Honeywine Hall, an old manor house in the mountains. It sounded perfect, hiking, horse trails, swimming in reservoirs and trips into Oldtown. She lived as vicariously as she could through Aemond’s nightly phone calls and the souvenirs he had sent her, the postcards, the photographs and even a book he had found in a second-hand shop in Oldtown, a special edition of Wuthering Heights with gold lettering on a patterned cover.

She and Aemond exchanged any details they might have missed from their phone calls. She liked watching him talk, the way his lips moved, the bashful way he would avert his eyes from hers when he felt himself going off on a tangent. Equally she liked the way he watched her when it was her turn to speak, the brightness of his eyes, his almost smug expression and the smile lines in his cheeks.

“Oh!” she gasped, feeling her eyes going wide, “and I read Wuthering Heights.” Of course she had. She had devoured it within days of receiving the parcel from him.

Aemond smiled and her heart ignited. Most of the books she read came at his recommendation.

“What did you think?” he asked, trailing the tip of his index finger up and down his glass.

“I mean, you know how I feel about classics, and I suppose it was rather difficult to get into at first, but it was…” she gestured vaguely with her hand while she tried to think, before she settled on “haunting.”

“Haunting,” he echoed. “In a good way or a bad way?”

“In a beautiful way.”

His eyes were on hers, his lips settled into a look of calm content, perhaps even pride. She hoped it was pride.

“It was so vivid. I loved the longing and the hopelessness,” she said.

Aemond laughed quietly at that, taking another sip of wine and drawing the tip of his tongue over his lips. “I knew you’d like it, you love the doom and gloom.”

If she did, it was because he had taught her to. They liked all the same things, classic fiction, horror movies, cold weather, black coffee, quiet moments during loud parties when their eyes would meet in understanding, or recognition that they were two people whose souls were the same.

She had to bite down her fury with her tongue between her teeth when someone else came along to steal Aemond’s attention. Rickard Thorne, she thought the guy’s name was, one of Aemond’s coursemates.

Jaya’s tactic for parties was to keep moving. She took Sabby by the hand and nodded at Jace, suggesting they move into the lounge. Alysanne had firmly been lost to Arryk; somehow she had turned a conversation about paralegal internships into flirting and Jaya was rather impressed.

She felt like she was good at this by now, starting conversations with the young and beautiful of the city’s elite, most of whom were students at the university– and spending a lot of these parties by Aemond’s side, she had picked up enough to converse with even the most pretentious of politics students. But it was her birthright to belong in a place like this. She didn’t have the silver hair or the violet eyes, but everyone knew who she was before she could tell them. She could see it in their eyes as she introduced herself. You’re Rhaenyra Targaryen’s daughter.

Each venture into the kitchen came with a stop by the assortment of bottles on the counter, but she mostly stuck with the arbour red. When she couldn’t find any more bottles of that, she and Sabby found a sickly sweet rosé that was easier to drink.

She checked the time at midnight, feeling a pleasant haze fall over her. She could hardly stop giggling at everything, at Sabby’s struggle to pour a drink and ending up with more wine on the counter than in her glass, at the couples in the hallway trying to suffocate each other with their mouths and bodies. She wandered through the house without knowing where she wanted to go, and squinted at the head of brown curls buried into the neck of Loras Tyrell. Shit. Well at least Jace was having some fun now.

She ended up in the dining room at the front of the house. This seemed to be where most of the fun was happening. There was a black leather sofa by the door, where Alysanne was sitting between Arryk and Aegon. They were sharing a bottle of vodka between them and whispering into each other’s ears between swigs.

In the centre of the room was a vintage mahogany table. A small group gathered around it, spectating an apparently gripping game of chess. Sitting over the white pieces was one of the Tully brothers, and over the black pieces was Aemond.

He had the sleeves of his shirt rolled up, leaning with his elbows on the table and swirling a glass of whisky as he considered his next move. A mischievous smirk graced his lips as he glanced up at his opponent, and raised his hand to move a piece. Their audience gasped and muttered amongst themselves in awe.

Aemond’s eyes met hers across the room. His hair had fallen slightly, the edges forming a curtain over his forehead. He smiled into his drink. This was his version of a few too many, challenging people to chess games and breaking out the expensive liquor.

She suddenly felt proud, then embarrassed, and turned back to the sofa.

Aegon was placing a pill on Alysanne’s tongue while Arryk handed her the vodka to wash it down. She winced but managed to swallow it.

Aegon caught Jaya’s eye. “Want one?” he asked, looking at her with his chin tilted down and his overgrown hair falling around his eyes. It looked less charming than Aemond’s, more messy than effortless.

The grin on his face made her feel uneasy. She had always been an observer of these habits, never a participant. She meant to ask what it was he had given Alysanne and the question was on the tip of her tongue—

“Zaldrīzītsos,”

Her head snapped back to Aemond without hesitation. He was turned away from the table a little, a dark, almost furious expression on his face. She wondered why, surely she hadn’t done anything wrong? He beckoned her over with a single finger but she was already walking towards him.

When she was close enough, Aemond wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her onto his lap. She burned where their skin met, especially when his hand came to hold her side, fingertips pressing into her flesh.

“Now,” he muttered into her ear and she shuddered at the sensation of his breath over her neck. “I want your help with something. Tell me you see what I’m seeing.”

She dragged her attention to the board and the pieces upon it. It almost felt like a test, but she had no intentions of disappointing him.

It wasn’t entirely obvious at first, they seemed to be pretty evenly matched, but then she saw it. A discrepancy in Tully’s game. She played through a few moves in her head, just like Aemond had taught her.

She turned her head back to Aemond with the beginnings of a smile. With his knowing look she knew she had it figured out.

She looked across the board at the Tully boy. “Checkmate in three,” she said.

His eyes widened and looked down frantically. “You’re bluffing,” he said, “you’re having me on, there’s no fucking way–”

“Do the honours for me, would you?” Aemond’s voice whispered in her ear, giving her waist a slight squeeze.

She couldn’t help but grin as she went to move one of Aemond’s pieces.

And suddenly Tully saw it too. “Shit,” he said. “Shit. Shit. Shit!” He tried desperately to counter with his Queen.

Jaya made the second move triumphantly, pitifully met by Tully’s attempt to save the game, but it was already won.

When she reached for the final move, Aemond’s hand wrapped around hers. “I started the game, only fair that I finish it, yes?”

She could hardly find the breath to reply. “Yes,” she uttered, letting Aemond guide her hand into her lap before he moved the final piece.

“Checkmate,” he said coolly, flicking over Tully’s King with his finger.

He would have won either way, but Jaya was happy to have even just a small share in his victory. But then with the game over, she supposed she didn’t have a reason to stay so close to him.

Aemond brought his face before hers, until the tips of their noses barely touched. “Good girl for spotting that,” he murmured.

His praise hit her like electricity. For a moment she thought she was going to lose her balance, bracing herself with a palm on his thigh as he brought both hands to her waist. She was steady. She was stable.

“How much have you had?” Aemond asked with a smirk.

“Gods, uncle, why do you have to sound so self-righteous?” she huffed, bringing her hands to the silky material of his shirt. She watched her hands glide over his chest, delicately and effortlessly. The top few buttons were undone, baring his neck. She thought about running her finger along it, down to the hollow spot in his collar bone. Or she could trail it along his jaw, over the sight hint of stubble she could see. Then she could let her thumb linger on his lip– Gods she loved his lips and the smile lines around his mouth.

A soft but startling noise brought both of their attention to the sofa. Sabby was here now too, but she was talking to Alysanne– no she was leaning over her, or was she trying to pull her up? Arryk and Aegon were on their feet, in some sort of argument.

Jaya frowned, trying to make sense of what she was seeing. “What are they–”

Aemond pushed her onto her feet by her waist. Now that she wasn’t sitting down she felt dizzy but she clung onto a chair to keep her balance.

Aemond was kneeling beside Alysanne and pulling her hair from her face while she was sprawled out on the sofa. Sabby was shouting at Aegon and Arryk.

Jaya felt more sober with each step she took towards them. She was hit with a boozy, sour smell and realised that the front of Alysanne’s top was drenched with what looked like water, but was trailing from her mouth. She was crying, and when Jaya got close enough, she saw her hands were trembling.

“Get the fuck away from her!” Jace’s voice bellowed from the doorway. He rushed forward and Aemond was by Jaya’s side before Jace could shove him away.

Jaya was frozen, even as Aemond curled his arm around her shoulder.

“She’ll be fine,” Aegon was saying, “she's just had a bad reaction, she can sleep it off.”

Sabby had Alysanne sitting up now. Her sobs were getting less frantic now, but it was hard to see her so clearly distressed.

Jace scowled at Aegon. “What did you give her?”

Jaya felt Aemond’s arm tensing tighter around her.

Aegon smiled. “Don’t worry, kid, wouldn’t dream of giving her anything too strong.”

She saw the way Jace’s jaw tensed at Aegon’s choice of words.

“Seven fucking hells,” Aemond muttered under his breath.

Her brother was on a knife’s edge, his fists clenching by his sides. Aegon seemed unphased at his silent threats.

Jaya pulled herself away from Aemond and went to Alysanne.

“How do you feel?” Sabby kept asking her.

“My head hurts,” Alysanne grumbled, cradling her forehead in her palms.

“Can you stand up?” Jaya suggested.

Alysanne lurched to her feet without warning, stumbling forward but Jaya and Sabby were there to catch her.

“There…” Alysanne groaned, but she was still struggling to find her footing. “I did it.”

“She needs to go home,” Sabby said, bringing Alysanne’s arm around her shoulders.

With one final seething glare to Aegon, then Arryk, then Aemond, Jace turned his anger to Jaya. “Why the fuck did you let that happen?” he hissed.

Her stomach dropped and she could only stare at him with wide eyes and furrowed brows. “What?” she uttered.

“Alysanne is your friend,” he seethed. “You should know better.”

He was right though. She had been the one to suggest Alysanne and Sabby come along. She had let Alysanne get close to Arryk and Aegon. She’d seen Aegon put a pill on her tongue and she hadn’t even questioned it.

Her eyes were starting to sting, like she wanted to cry but she couldn’t quite remember how. She just wished Jace would stop looking at her like that, his glare laced with venom and scolding, like she was a child, like he knew better. Jace always thought he knew better.

Aemond stepped forward to help Sabby carry Alysanne. “I’ll call you a car—”

“No,” Jace snapped, standing in his way. “You lot have done enough already.” He brought one arm around Alysanne and pulled out his phone with his other hand. He muttered something to Sabby and the three of them began to muddle their way to the hallway.

“Oh you’re leaving?” Aegon called after them with a dramatic frown and his hand clutched to his chest.

Jaya could only find herself able to watch and breathe in the stench of her friend’s vomit. The other faces in the room were hungry and curious. They all had their heads close together, whispering and gasping but not loud enough that she could make out anything tangible.

Aemond leaned into her and she instinctively met his gaze. “Are you going too?”

She realised Jace was stopped in the doorway, glaring at her expectantly.

Then Sabby’s voice called from the front door. Their car was here. They needed to leave now. Alysanne had to get home.

“Jaya can spend the night here, Jace,” Aemond said before she could think of something to say. “I’ll drop her off in the morning.”

Jace’s face fell as he looked at his sister one final time. Jaya gave him a small nod and then he was gone.

The house was surprisingly quiet once the front door slammed shut.

And of course there was only one person who was going to break the silence.

Aegon began laughing. It wasn’t a sound she liked. It was loud and obnoxious and cold. But the attention was on him at least and before long it was almost as if nothing had happened. Arryk grabbed some paper towels, Aegon was doing lines off the dining table, and Jaya was still standing in the middle of the room, letting the noise of chatter and the bass of a slow song float through her.

Aemond’s hand on her shoulder anchored her back into the room.

“I think you should go to sleep,” he said.

“But it’s early,” she groaned as he guided her towards the kitchen.

She hooked her arms around his elbow as he reached for a glass and filled it with water.

“It’s nearly one,” he said, handing her the glass. “Come on, we’ll get up early and get you something to eat before you go home. Sound good?”

She nodded as she tried to drink and ended up banging her teeth on the glass. Aemond chuckled softly, it was more like a hum in his throat. She had an awful feeling that he was laughing at her mistake.

He draped her jacket over his spare arm and led her through the hallway, up the winding staircase to the top floor. The house had three in total and because it was only the two of them living there, Aegon and Aemond had their own floors with a bedroom, an ensuite and a study— not that Aegon’s study was ever used for its intended purpose.

She loved Aemond’s bedroom with its dark wood floors, forest green walls, rows of bookshelves and the old record player in the corner. She went into the ensuite to wash the makeup from her face and the wine stains in the corners of her mouth, brushed her teeth with a spare toothbrush and changed into the t-shirt Aemond had pulled from his drawer.

When she came back into the room Aemond was only in his jeans, his shirt thrown over a chair, leaning by the open window and fiddling with a filter and a packet of tobacco. She was determined not to look at his chest, the lines of his abs, or the trail of silver hair running below the waistband of his jeans.

“Light?” he muttered when he noticed her.

Jaya nodded and took the lighter from the pocket of her jacket. She tried to walk as straight as she could over to where Aemond was. He placed the cigarette between his teeth and leaned into her.

It took her a few tries to spark the light. She huffed at her own incompetence and dug her teeth into her lower lip, but her third attempt proved to be a charm. The flame bathed Aemond’s face with warmth and flickers of shadows over the angles of his face.

She watched, hypnotised by the way his chest rose as he inhaled the smoke, and the way his lips pouted as he turned his head and expelled it towards the window. Even then she could smell the smoke and feel traces of it burning in her nose and throat.

His eyes moved back to her. He smirked at her apparent fascination.

He offered her the cigarette and she frowned. He’d never done that before.

Her hands felt light and a little numb, but she reached for it, holding it between her fingers like he always did. But then she realised she had no idea what she should do next.

“Take a drag,” Aemond said softly. “But not too much, you'll make yourself sick.”

She brought it to her lips and started to pull the smoke into her mouth. Her eyes moved to his when she had reached the end of his instruction.

“Hold it.” The gentle commanding of his voice put her on edge.

She decided the taste and the sensation of the smoke wasn’t pleasant, but she didn’t dislike it.

“Breathe in…” Aemond said, his chest moving with hers as she inhaled the smoke, “... and out.”

As she exhaled she blew the smoke over Aemond’s face. “Fuck!” she giggled, trying to wave it away, “sorry, I just didn’t think–”

“It’s alright,” Aemond said with a smile as he took the cigarette back from her and brought it to his lips again. “How do you feel?”

She let her head fall towards her shoulder. She felt light and heavy. Happy and sad. Lots of things and nothing specific.

After another exhale of smoke out the window, Aemond took a step into her and leaned down to press a light kiss to her forehead.

Jaya’s chest felt tight. Her heart raced but she stopped herself from reacting.

She couldn’t remember when Aemond started to make her feel nervous. When they were kids they were inseparable, even though she was closer in age to Daeron and their parents were convinced she and Helaena should be like sisters. She followed him everywhere, asked him questions constantly and insisted they hold hands wherever they went. She adored him. She still did now.

She muttered a quiet “night,” and dragged herself towards the bed, wrapping herself in the heavy duvet and curling into the pillows.

She couldn’t sleep yet. The noise of the party hummed through the house, but what caught her attention was the sound of Aemond’s breath moving between his lips. She could still picture his face perfectly, the pout of his lips and his jaw.

She couldn’t help it. She opened her eyes. He was leaning against the windowsill, tapping the ash into a small tray before taking another few drags. She watched him until he stubbed the embers out and moved his hands down to the buttons on his jeans.

A thrill rippled down her front, down to her abdomen.

Stop it.

She quickly turned onto her other side, pulling the duvet up to her chin. She still didn’t let herself fall asleep. She waited with bated breath.

She followed the gentle thud of his jeans being tossed onto the chair and the sound of his footsteps. He let out a throaty sigh as the mattress dipped behind her.

And then she felt him, the warmth of his body against her back, his arm around her waist, pulling her into him, his breath fluttering against her loose hair.

“I’m sorry if you didn’t have a good night,” he muttered. She felt the hum of his voice between her shoulders.

“No,” she whispered, “it was fine.”

It wasn’t fine. She still wanted to cry.

Aemond’s hand started to trace circles over her stomach through the t-shirt. This kind of proximity had become a habit between them even after they had outgrown childish affection, lingering touches and delicate kisses. She loved it. He wasn’t this close with anyone else.

But she couldn't stop thinking about Alysanne, the grin on Aegon's mouth as he fed her the pill, or the look of anger on Jace's face when he left.

“I’m sorry if I embarrassed you,” she said.

Aemond froze, his hand paused, splayed across her stomach. It left her with a tight, restless feeling in her belly.

Then he embraced her, tightening his grip, almost squeezing her against him and burying his face into her neck. “Never,” he muttered, his breath hot against her skin. “You could never make me feel like that.”

For a moment his lips pressed against her neck. Aemond pulled away slightly, seemingly having done it by accident. Jaya was still, clinging onto his arm and holding her breath.

Until Aemond leaned in again to place a soft but purposeful kiss to her neck. It felt like she was being smothered, the weight of his body pressing into her side, his arm keeping her tightly against him, while her breath came through her nose and mouth with little huffs.

He began to trail his kisses up her neck, along her jaw, to her cheek, until she realised what he wanted. She angled her head back, enough for him to press his lips against hers.

He kissed her slowly, letting his lips drag lazily over hers as his hand crept beneath her t-shirt.

She gave a short whine when she felt his palm against her bare skin.

“Shh,” he cooed against her mouth, letting his tongue slip between her lips. He tasted sweet and bitter, like wine and whisky and smoke. He was still gentle though, and Jaya eased herself further into him.

She wasn’t sure how long they stayed like that, but she must have fallen asleep at some point, no matter how she wished they could have stayed in a blissful mess of warmth, lips, tongue and teeth.

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