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harryslittlefreakk · 2 months

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drunk in love

a late night talking extra 💓

summary: harry invites y/n to a party celebrating his upcoming final LOT show

warnings: very light smut (pretty much just touchy feely, male masturbation), alcohol use

wordcount: 4.1k

a/n: i want this to be me ? if i could have any harry, i want this one 😭 can’t believe it’s nearly a month since i last posted!!! sorry!!

you can find my masterlist here! happy reading 🫶🏼💖

“Harry, seriously!” You were swatting his hands away for what felt like the thousandth time that evening.

“Please. Missed you,” he pouted, opting to wrap his arms around your waist instead.

“I know baby, missed you too. But walking into the party late and together is hardly keeping it on the down low.”

It was Harry’s idea to keep it quiet tonight, for you to be by his side as a friend of Gemma’s and nothing more. His nearest and dearest had flown to Italy to celebrate the end of Love on Tour, and while he knew he could trust the majority of the guests, there were sure to be people who’d sell photos for a quick buck. You were happy to keep your privacy a little longer, but truthfully, you were itching to shout from the rooftops. It had only been a month since you’d met Harry, and you hadn’t even seen him for 3 weeks of that month. But it was the best month of your life.

“Don’t wanna keep it on the down low,” he groaned, throwing his head down into the crook of your neck. “You do, and you’ll thank yourself for it.”

His green eyes were peeking at you through the mirror, hungry and desperate for more of you. If it were any other occasion you’d be straight into bed with him, but you wanted so badly to make a good impression tonight. You were lucky to have Anne and Gemma on your side already, the pair of them taking to you so well that Harry even ended up setting up a group chat for the four of you to keep in touch while he was away. A mother’s judgement was quick and usually correct, and Harry had made it explicitly clear to you that she totally adored you. You were normal, she said. But still, meeting the remainder of Harry’s closest business partners, friends and family was downright terrifying to you.

“Would help with your nerves.”

“Harry, we have to be there in half an hour. You’re not even dressed.”

“Don’t have to get dressed if I’m jus’ going to get undressed.”

“Go next door and get dressed. Or let go of me so I can,” you laughed, turning around to press a kiss to his forehead.

He trailed away silently, feet scuffing on the carpet before he threw himself down on the bed. Always one for the dramatics. “At least let me see what you’re wearing before I go.”

You padded across the hotel room, pulling a metallic gold maxi dress from the wardrobe. You’d worried it would be too much, far too attention grabbing at a party where you wanted to stay out of the spotlight. But Gemma and Joanie had convinced you, and now that you held it up towards the window, you could finally see their vision.

The slowly setting sun was beautiful, gold and pink tones washing across the sky. You’d never been to Italy before, and suddenly it was your favourite place to be. The Mediterranean was good to Harry, the tan he’d picked up since you saw him last now rich and deep. He was glowing so brightly that you swore he could literally illuminate a dark room. Even the tiny beads of sweat on his chest sparkled like diamonds. He was delicious, and yet you couldn’t bring yourself to look at him for too long. The way his eyes were fixed on you, likely imagining himself doing filthy things to you in that dress, made you weak at the knees. You had, what, 5 or so minutes until Gemma came to collect you? Plenty could be done in that time. But as soon as the idea popped into your head, Gemma’s voice came from the other side of the door.

“Get out Harry,” she called. He groaned as he heard her, running a frustrated hand through his messy curls. “You’ll look beautiful, always do,” Harry told you, pressing a kiss on your lips as he moped over to the door. He said a quick hello to Gemma before leaving, knowing that if he lingered around you for any longer, he’d never make it to his own celebration.

“What’s up with him?” Gemma laughed, pointing behind her as the heavy door swung shut. “Needy,” you told her, amusement tugging at the corners of your mouth. “I told you he still throws a tantrum! You think he’s all grown up on the surface, but there’s a stroppy little boy in there still.”

You pulled her in for a hug, grateful to have her by your side. “I’m really nervous,” you confessed, sinking down onto the edge of the bed. “I don’t know who Harry’s told what to, don’t want to slip up and ruin it for either of us.” You pulled your bottom lip into your mouth, the weight of your nerves finally crashing down on you. You hadn’t wanted to show Harry how anxious you were, knowing that he’d never leave your side if he knew.

“You poor thing,” Gemma smiled, placing a protective hand on your arm as she joined you on the soft bed. “I’ll be by your side as long as you want me to be. Some of Mum’s friends are coming too, so if you need a break from the crazy, they’ll be happy to look after you. Proper British mums.”

—

The venue was potentially one of the most beautiful places you’d ever seen. A rooftop bar with floor to ceiling windows leading out onto a patio, the evening sun casting a warm orange glow over every inch of the crowded room. You didn’t think you could ever get over the views from this high up, even stores and corner shops looked beautiful. In the few hours since you’d arrived in Italy, it had totally captured your heart. You could see why Harry chose here for his final show.

“Ready?” Gemma asked, pulling you out of your thoughts.

“Ready,” you smiled, taking a deep breath as you followed her through the double doors.

There were so many people you recognised, some people you didn’t, and it was genuinely like walking into a weird fantasy. A month ago you were getting ready to see your favourite artist perform, now you were walking into a room of celebrities with his sister by your side. It didn’t matter how many times you went through it in your head, how many times you looked through your pictures with Harry, it never felt real.

Gemma took you to meet some of the band first, Sarah, Mitch and Pauli all huddled around a high table. They greeted Gemma warmly, but when Sarah’s eyes landed on you, she threw her arms around you with almost enough enthusiasm to knock you off your feet. “Y/n! You look incredible,” she grinned, squeezing you tightly. “She’s had one too many already,” Mitch muttered, nodding a gentle hello.

You stayed with them as Gemma went to get you both a drink, listening to their stories of touring and performing in different cities around the world, each tale filled with laughter and joy. Speaking to people who had known Harry on a deeper level for so many years made your heart soar, the same tenderness and care he showed you evident in the way his band mates spoke of him. Just as your eyes began to wander across the room to find him, Gemma returned with two glasses of Prosecco, handing one to you with a warm smile. “Got to keep moving, but we’ll be back,” she told the group, guiding you to some more of Harry’s friends.

—

From the other end of the bar, Harry’s eyes were fixed on you. He took a sip of his drink, his gaze never wavering as he watched you laugh with Sarah and Glenne. The way your eyes sparkled as you giggled, the tiny snorts that slipped out when something was truly funny. He was totally captivated by you. Harry couldn’t help but feel an overwhelming protectiveness, so desperately wishing he could’ve been the one to introduce you to his loved ones. He’d watched as you and Gemma made the rounds, shaking hands and exchanging hugs with his friends and colleagues. You’d mesmerised every single one of them, effortlessly commanding attention as if tonight was for you. He’d had no doubts about them liking you, seeing in you what he did, but there was still a little bit of pride bubbling away inside of him. You were his girl, and you were fitting into his life so perfectly. He may have been a little tipsy, his emotions a little heightened, but right there he realised he couldn’t imagine a life without you.

He started to make his way towards you, silently joining your group with a dorky grin plastered on his face. Your brows furrowed as you looked over at him, rocking on his heels slowly as he stared between the three of you. Sarah and Glenne could only laugh, taking his appearance as their cue to leave.

“Do I have something on my face?” you smirked once you were alone with Harry.

“Little bit of sexy right.. there,” he grinned, reaching out slowly to poke at your cheek. His playful grin widened as he leaned in closer, a tiny chuckle slipping past his lips. "Gonna need to wipe that off," Harry teased, his warm breath brushing over your skin.

“Is that so?”

“Absolutely. Can’t risk anyone else seeing that.” His finger lingered on your skin for a moment, tracing light patterns before he pulled away, replacing his gentle touch with soft kisses.

“Harry!” you scolded, trying to pull away from him before anyone noticed.

“No one’s looking,” he murmured against your skin, wrapping an arm around your waist and tugging you closer. His lips wrapped around your earlobe, his teeth grazing the skin as he sucked tenderly.

“Let’s leave, come home with me,” Harry groaned, his voice husky. His hand was splayed against the curve of your ass, his bulge starting to stiffen against your core. Being so close to him for the first time that evening felt like heaven, but you were far too conscious of the amount of people around you. Still, you instinctively turned your head, giving him access to kiss along your neck.

“This is your party, H,” you reminded him, familiar butterflies taking flight within your core as his tongue flicked against your skin. As much as you wanted to give in to Harry, you couldn’t be responsible for taking him away from his own celebration, so many people here for him.

But each movement of his tongue tightened the knot in your core, your walls aching for his touch. His voice, muffled against your skin, whispered, “I know, love. But y’look so fuckin’ good.“

You let out a soft moan as his lips trailed higher, his teeth grazing lightly along your jawline. The pleasure was almost agonising, you couldn’t help arching your back, craving more of his touch. The warmth of his breath against your skin sent shivers down your spine, the strong scent of spirits mixed with his aftershave, almost enough to put you in a trance.

Harry’s voice was filled with desire, continuing to coax you into surrendering to him. “Can’t help myself, princess. Not when y’look like that,” he murmured, your breath hitching as his lips finally found your mouth, his movements soft yet desperate. His tongue danced around yours, exploring every corner of your mouth as though trying to memorise each taste and sensation.

You gripped onto his shoulders, your fingers digging into the fabric of his shirt, desperately trying to ground yourself. “I want you,” Harry panted as he pulled away, his lips swollen and breath ragged.

You were totally lost in him, your chest heaving as Harry stared deep into your eyes, searching for any sign that he’d convinced you enough.

“That is quite enough of that.” A voice came from behind you, startling you both out of your moment of serenity. You jumped away from Harry to see Anne giving you both the once-over, a hint of amusement dancing across her face. “You,” she pointed at Harry, “keep your tongue where it belongs. You,” she was grabbing a hold of your forearm, “with me.”

You could feel a blush creeping up your cheeks as Anne whisked you away, consumed by the long forgotten teenage embarrassment of being caught kissing by a parent. “Sorry,” you cringed, unable to meet her eyes. “It’s only a little kiss, love. I just wanted to help you escape him before anyone else saw,” Anne smiled.

“Oh,” you giggled, relief washing over you. With all the sneaking around, you sometimes had to remind yourself that you weren’t actually a disobedient teenager, waiting to be caught after sneaking a boy into your room.

Anne took you to meet her friends properly, the women she referred to as Harry’s other mums. They were exactly as Gemma had described, the exact same personality that your mum had, the stereotypical welcoming British mum. They told you countless stories of a younger Harry - the cheeky little boy who was always trying to make everyone laugh, to the teenager who took every opportunity to sing in his bedroom. It was always weird to you, knowing so much already about someone who was still new to you. Thankfully, everyone in Harry’s life seemed to accept that you’d been a (deranged) fan of his before you started dating. As he’d told you many times, it would be borderline impossible to date someone who had no idea who he was. Unless he dated babies or old ladies, and he’d been very clear that he didn’t fancy dating either of them.

“How did you two meet?” one of Anne’s friends had asked. It may have only been a month ago, but this was already your favourite story to tell. “In a Starbucks,” you confessed, cheeks tinged pink at the memory. “I was actually seeing him at Wembley, and we just happened to be in Starbucks at the same time. He asked me for a napkin and,” you shrugged, “we just hit it off from there.” Even the world’s strongest man couldn’t wipe the grin off your face at that moment. You loved to talk about your meet-cute, the way your heart caught in your throat at the sight of Harry’s rings, the way you ended up basically living with him for a week from that moment onwards. And yet, you couldn’t focus fully, still heated from your moment with Harry earlier.

His touch still lingered on your skin, warm tingles spreading across your waist where he’d pulled you into him. Anne’s friend grinned back at you, your feelings for Harry evident in the way you spoke about him. “Sounds like fate,” she told you, rubbing a hand on Anne’s thigh. “Your little boy all grown up and in love,” she laughed.

You nodded, unable to hide the sparkle in your eyes as you thought about Harry. It really did feel like fate had bought you here, a higher power intervening to lead you to him. As the conversation continued, you couldn’t help but steal glances at Harry across the room. He was dancing with Jeff, and an unexpected guest - at least for you - James Corden. You knew they were friends, you’d watched Harry’s carpool karaoke and every other late late show segment an embarrassing number of times. But to see him here, genuinely friends with Harry was so bizarre to you. You’d never seen him drunk before, and it wasn’t too different from a puppy with the zoomies. His feet moving too fast for his body, his drink sloshing around the glass as he threw his arms around anyone who caught his eye. He just radiated pure happiness, the very definition of a golden retriever boyfriend.

Harry’s eyes met yours as you watched him, the green of his irises darkening the longer his gaze rested on you. You blew him a kiss, laughing as he mimed catching it and pressing it to his lips. It was insane how someone so sexually driven could be so fucking cute. If you met him for the very first time while he was being sweet, you’d never expect what he could do to you in bed. And if you met him for the very first time in bed, you’d never expect how loving he could be. And now you were thinking of him in bed and getting yourself all worked up again.

“I’m just going to nip to the toilet,” you told Anne, signalling your head towards the corner of the room. You purposely walked behind Harry, trailing a light hand across his lower back to grab his attention, sauntering away without a glance back. You didn’t have to look to know he’d be following you. He caught up to you as you reached the entrance of the toilets, grabbing a hold of your hips with his bulge pressed firmly against your lower back.

“Didn’t think you could get away without me, did you?” he slurred against your ear, guiding you towards the cubicle at the end of the corridor. “Harry, babe, I got your attention so that you’d follow me.”

He laughed, locking the door behind him as one hand trailed up your torso. “Knew you couldn’t resist me,” he smirked, eyes landing on your tits as you turned to face him.

“Was doing fine until you played dirty,” you told him, tangling a hand in the curls at the nape of his neck. He pulled you close to him, his mouth lingering dangerously close to yours. All he could think about was ruining you, having you begging for mercy as he shot streams of his hot cum into you, finally fucking something other than his fist. But he couldn’t do any of that here, couldn’t fuck you the way he needed to in a bathroom stall. “I like playing dirty,” he whispered, crashing his lips against yours. He walked you backwards, hands moving to unzip your dress as his tongue danced around your mouth.

He pulled away to help you out of your dress, his cock twitching as you stepped out of it, left in only your tiny thong and heels. “Fucking hell,” Harry groaned, one hand tracing the curve of your waist as he looked you up and down. Your lips were swollen from his kiss, eyes hazy as you watched him undo his trousers. The second his cock sprung out of his pants you reached for it, desperate to feel it again after so long. Harry grabbed your hand, tangling his fingers in yours, denying you a touch. “Can’t fuck you the way I want to here,” he whispered. “Just need you to stand there and look pretty f’me.”

You nodded, swallowing thickly as he began to stroke his cock. You needed to come, but you didn’t want to spoil your appetite for him. So if Harry needed you to stand and watch him, a starter before your well-earned main course, you were more than happy to. “So fuckin’ beautiful,” he groaned, gripping onto your hip with his free hand. He knew he wasn’t going to last long, he never did with you involved, each stroke only making his core tighten more.

He looked fucking hot. His hair messy, sweat glistening on his neck as he stroked the sweet cock that you’d missed so dearly. Precum was gathering on his tip, his rings clashing together as he grunted and groaned, blown-out pupils fixed on your body. You couldn’t hold in the pants and moans that were forming in your throat, your core on fire as you watched Harry bring himself closer to his climax.

“Turn around,” he drawled, pushing your back down as his tip bumped against your ass, your eyes glued to him in the mirror. He pulled your thong to the side, pushing his fingers inside of your entrance. “Gonna- fuck-” he panted, no time to get you stretched out for his cock before his orgasm started to creep up on him. You shuffled your feet outwards, resting your elbows down on the countertop so he could enter you. He pushed into you quickly, the burn pulling a deep cry from inside of you. “Come, baby,” you pleaded, mouth locked open as your walls closed around him. Harry shot his cum into you, sighs of relief tumbling out of both of your mouths to finally feel your cores connected again, finally have his thick cum deep inside of you.

He stilled, rubbing his hands across your asscheeks, dizzy from the sensation of being deep in you.

The moment was quickly broken by someone banging on the door, and Harry jumped back, the sudden absence of his cock making you a little sad. “Occupied,” he called out, buttoning up his trousers before picking up your dress. “Bastards,” he smirked, bending down behind you to help you back into your clothes. He pressed a kiss to the bottom of your asscheek, moving your panties back over to cover your mound.

“Can’t leave together,” Harry said as his shaky hands did up your zip, still dazed from his orgasm.

“Go,” you told him, pressing a final kiss to his lips. “Need to touch up my makeup anyway.”

—

You could hear Harry’s voice booming over the music as you left the toilets, the rest of the party fallen silent. “Here she is!” he slurred as you came around the corner. Harry was standing on a table, a microphone in his hand as he addressed the crowd gathered in front of him. He reached out a beckoning finger to you, motioning for you to come over. You could hardly reject him in front of all of these eyes, let alone with that cheesy grin calling out to you. “This is Y/N, and f’anybody who doesn’t know, she’s my future wife,” he beamed as you got closer.

He giggled into the microphone, jumping down off of the table on unsteady legs. Harry’s audience clapped at his words, a few drunken cheers erupting. “Louder!” he demanded, “everyone cheer for Y/N!”

He had far too much power with a microphone in his hands, you thought to yourself as he wrapped an arm tight around your shoulders, pressing a kiss to your temple. You knew you were blushing wildly, not at all used to being in the spotlight. You rested your head on his shoulder, hoping it would somehow obscure you from view. “Seriously,” Harry continued, his goofy grin not budging as he glanced down at you, “this woman is the joy of my life. And you’re all close seconds. Thank you f’coming out to celebrate me, the band and everyone who’s worked on this tour. Roll on Saturday!”

He dropped the microphone onto the table behind him, moving his hand to cup your cheek before pressing his lips to yours, harder this time. The rest of the party had started to disperse around the room again, but now it didn’t matter if anyone saw. You were kissing Harry, properly kissing him, in public, and there was very little that could bring you down from that high. As he pulled away, Harry sat back on the table, pulling you to stand between his legs. “M’ so proud of you,” you whispered, brushing your fingertips across his cheek. He was looking deep in your eyes, his stare laced with something deeper than the affection he’d shown you before. “I love y-”, he started, his words cut off when you slapped a hand over his mouth. “Nuh uh, not letting you say it when you’re drunk,” you laughed, snarling at him as he tried to pull your hand away. When he finally managed, he pinned your hands to your sides, turning you around in his arms until your back was flush with his chest.

“A drunken mind speaks sober thoughts,” he chuckled, peppering soft kisses down your shoulder. You could have exploded, physically exploded in that moment. “Harry,” you warned, unable to wipe the smile from your face. He pressed his lips close to your ear, his warm breath washing over the side of your face. “I love you,” he whispered, grinning at you as you craned your neck to face him. “I love you,” you replied, heart hammering against your ribcage as the words finally came out. “Can I take you home now?” Harry smirked, his fingers dancing across your waist. “Please,” you whispered, taking his hand in yours.

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#harry styles fluff #harry styles smut #harry styles x reader #harry edward styles #harry styles fic #harry styles fanfic #harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x y/n #harry styles masterlist #harryslittlefreakk #late night talking #harry styles x fan

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norrizzandpia · 7 months

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The Vacation (Caught Part 2)(OP81)

Summary: They keep getting caught.

Warnings: SMUUUTTTTTTTTTTTT 🤭, im talking like oral sex (f and m receiving), chaos, robert and logan being stupid, oscar and yn being stupid, language, EVERYONE IS QUESTIONABLE

Note: I’ll never get over this kind of scenario (i will literally never want to stop writing it) ALSO this could be read in the same universe as the other one but it can also be a standalone whatever is best for you 🤭

“OSCAR!” The sweet yelp of her voice warmed his heart, his head immediately turning to locate her in the sea of people eating.

Once his eyes landed on her, his favorite black dress hugging her just right, he smiled and got up from his chair to pull out hers.

“How was shopping, baby?” He asked as she sat down, Logan and Robert nodding their heads at her from across the table.

She nodded back before landing a kiss on Oscar’s cheek when he sat back down, his face blushing red, “It was so good! Italy has the best boutiques!”

He eyed the multitude of bags she had shoved under the table, laughing at her antics as he remembered that same morning when she complained about being broke.

“Very happy for you, my love.” His giggling continued with Y/n eyeing him, already knowing what he was fussing about and shutting down the lecture before it even started.

Logan shook his head, “Alright, you two make me sick. That’s enough of that.”

Robert nodded in agreement as Oscar tilted his head, “Uh, I’m sorry, but who said this trip would be fun? I’m pretty sure it was you two who added me and Y/n into the group chat and demanded that we buy plane tickets to Italy with you guys for a whole ass month of our summer break.”

Y/n hummed, agreeing with her boyfriend and loving the scene that was playing out in front of her.

The three men continued to bicker lightly about the subject before Y/n was shutting them up and forcing them to decide what they wanted to eat.

“Ok, mom.” Robert sighed, throwing his head back in fake annoyance.

Oscar chuckled, saying, “Does that make me daddy?”

It was clear his intrusive thoughts won as the entire table slowly turned their heads around to meet him, bug-eyed and horrified.

“Sorry,” He whispered, getting back to his menu.

—

“So, tomorrow?” Logan asked as they all stood in front of the doors of their rooms at the AirBnb.

Tucked under Oscar’s arm, Y/n groaned, “Can we please have a slow morning? It was so early when we got up today.”

“You literally were the only one who wanted to see the sunrise.” Robert scoffed, his arms crossing over his chest as Y/n shrunk further into Oscar’s warm embrace.

“It was pretty,” She mumbled, Oscar tightening his hold on her.

“Alright, shut the fuck up, Robert. Don’t act like you weren’t take millions of photos and acting like it was the greatest thing you’ve ever laid your eyes on.” Logan shot back, sending him a glare that had the couple across from him laughing.

“Slow morning, it is!” Oscar exclaimed, opening the door to his and Y/n’s room.

“Goodnight, guys.” He said quickly as he shoved her into the four walls. Y/n stood, staring blankly at him and his abrupt behavior, as he waved to their friends and closed the door.

“What was tha-” She began as Oscar stocked toward her and planted his lips on hers. She gasped lightly before falling into the rhythm, her hands finding his hair as his found her waist.

“You’ve looked so good all night, baby.” He whispered against her lips as his hands trailed up and down the sides of her body.

“From the moment I saw you, I knew I was done for.” He mumbled again, lips kissing the side of her mouth as they found her jawline and neck.

“Osc,” She sighed as he found the sweet spot right behind her ear, sucking lightly. His hands were constant. Gripping at her ass, roaming around her torso, sliding them under her dress, he was everywhere.

“Y/n, I don’t think you understand how much you tortured me tonight. I’ve wanted you so badly all night that I was so close to fucking you in a bathroom stall.” He whispered in her ear as his hands played with the hem of the black material.

Her whimpering told him everything he needed to know, but he didn’t really care.

“Do you need me, baby?” He said lowly as he took a small step back to look in her eyes.

She nodded, eager, but he laughed, “No, baby. That’s not how this goes. You made me wait all night, so now you’ll wait all night.”

With a light force, he pushed her back onto the bed, her legs falling open slightly. He kneeled before her, white button up sleeves rolled up to his elbow as he looked up at her with lust-blown eyes. His hands nudged her knees further away from each other, her matching black underwear now fully visible to him.

His fingers tracing over the thin material that served as the only barrier between where she needed him and himself, Oscar scoffed, “This is new.”

She nodded, “I bought it today for you.”

“For me?” He said, grinning at her.

She nodded, seemingly thinking this would make him more merciful.

It wouldn’t.

“Well, I’m going to rip them off anyway.” He said as he began pushed her dress up past her waist and pushing the lace to the side. Herself being fully exposed to him, Oscar blew air on her clit, something that made her shutter.

“You like that?” He whispered as his other hand massaged her thigh.

“Oscar,” She moaned, clearly already frustrated from the lack of touch when he was speaking to her in the way he was.

At her pleading tone, no matter how much he wanted to tease her, Oscar caved in. His tongue reached out to lick a stride up her slit before coming to circle forcefully around her clit. Her mouth fell open in a soft groan as he stared up at her, his tongue continuing its work below.

Her hands fisted the bedsheets when he grabbed one and forced them into his hair, her fingers tangling in the strands. His tongue circled a few more times before licking back down to prod at her hole. The wet noises filled the room as well as the sounds of her moans as his hands traveled up to palm her boobs. She got louder, per usual, when she felt his tongue begin circling inside her at the same time his hands took her boobs out of her dress and began pinching, playing with her nipples.

“Oscar, yes, fuck. Right there.” She moaned, hands gripping his hair so incredibly tight.

The telltale sign that she was close, the one thing he always knew to be true when it came to his girlfriend in the bedroom, was when she began riding his face. Something she started doing when he found a way to simultaneously hit her clit with his nose and continue his prodding.

Just when she was about to cum, the coil in her stomach so tight she felt crazed, he pulled away.

“What the fuck!” She yelped as he leaned back on his feet, wiping the wetness off his face.

“I told you I was going to make you wait all night. What do you think that meant?” He said, crawling onto the bed to sit beside her.

“But, there is one way I know you can make it up to me.” He whispered in her ear, his hand coming up to brush the messy locks of hair off her shoulder and behind her ear.

Her eyebrows shot up, eyeing the bulge of his boxers when he grabbed her hand and trailed it down his abs.

When their hands came to cover his crotch, he used his other hand to grab her jaw and force her eyes on him, “Is this okay?”

The quick change in demeanor had her smiling as she nodded and said, “I’ll do you one better.”

She watched as his eyes lit up and he groaned deeply at the sight of her sliding off the bed and onto her knees in front of him. When her hands unbuttoned his pants and shimmied them down just enough so she could pull him out from under his boxers, Oscar’s hand came to grab ahold of her hair.

“You’re so good to me, love.” He moaned when her hands lightly caressed him. His breath, however, and ability to do anything but moan was taken when her mouth enclosed around his dick. The whole world went dark when he felt her tongue swirl around his tip and collect the pre-cum that had accumulated.

Her mouth stretched to accommodate his size as she sunk down on him. His hands tightening in his hair, Oscar loudly moaned, “Y/n, yes.”

Her small hands worked what her mouth couldn’t reach as she trailed her tongue up and down his vein. When she lost track of her movements and he hit the back of her throat, Oscar yelled, “Fuck!”

She giggled, the vibrations sending more moans out of his mouth as she continued working on his length.

The poor couple, too engrossed in their world of pleasure, didn’t realize just how loud they were being. When Oscar yelled out as he had before, Logan and Robert both walked out of their rooms to check on, what they though, was their pained friend.

“It sounded like he fell?” Robert tried as he closed his door at the same time as Logan.

Logan nodded, “Yeah, all I heard was ‘fuck’ and thought it was best to just check up on him. God knows Y/n can’t carry him if he got badly injured.”

So, the concerned friends made their way closer to the room. Maybe if they hadn’t thought he was hurt in the first place, they would’ve understood that the groans they were hearing as the neared weren’t out of pain, but something else.

Nonetheless, the boys knocked quickly on the door, allowing for no response, before opening the door.

“YOU’RE ACTUALLY FUCKING KIDDING ME!” Robert screamed as he covered his eyes. It didn’t work though, the image of one of his best friends getting a blowjob from his girlfriend cruelly engrained in his brain.

“HOLY SHIT!” Oscar yelped, pushing Y/n off him whilst simultaneously standing up to cover her. What he didn’t account for was the fact that he was more naked than her, so all he did was stand up and give his friends a better view of his semi-hard dick.

“PUT IT AWAY!” Logan cried, hands coming to cover his eyes as he struggled to close the door.

From behind him, Y/n extended her arm out so she could pull his pants up for him. It did nothing, but remind him that all he had to do was tuck himself back in and zip it up. Something he did immediately.

By the time he was finished and Y/n had fixed her dress, the two stared at each other.

“Do we go talk to them?” She whispered, arms wrapped around herself as she continued to relive the embarrassment.

Oscar nodded, “I think we have to. We can’t just leave it unsaid.”

No matter how much she didn’t want to, Y/n agreed.

With that and Oscar’s hand in hers, they trailed sheepishly out of the room. Finding the other two boys with their head in their hands on the couch, Y/n and Oscar stood in front of them. The Australian going first.

“We’re sorry for what you saw. That wasn’t supposed to happen.” He tried, shrugging at his last statement.

“I sure hope it wasn’t planned, dumbass.” Logan snapped, eyes refusing to look up.

Robert nodded, however his eyes were able to meet theirs, “Alright, I mean, it is what it is.”

Y/n and Oscar glanced at each other, “What?”

Robert got up from his spot and began his way back to his room, “I was in shock at first, but it isn’t like I didn’t know this was going on. I’ve been in the room right next to you guys before and you’re always so loud.”

Again, Y/n and Oscar stood in the middle of the room, mouth agape at the revelation.

“He’s actually so right.” Logan fired back. The couple’s heads slowly turned back to the American, their faces having drained of any color at all.

“What do you mean?” Oscar stepped forward as Logan stood up.

The blonde stared back at them for a moment before booking it out of the room and mumbling something about being confused.

Oscar, knowing he was lying, chased after him as he began yelling, “LOGAN, SPILL IT!”

This left Y/n, who was partially traumatized, to stare at the wall and wonder how she even got here in the first place.

In love and absolutely, positively caught.

#f1 fanfic #f1 imagine #f1 fic #f1 x reader #mclaren #oscar piastri fanfiction #oscar piastri x reader #oscar piastri imagines #oscar piasstri #oscar piastri imagine #oscar piastri smut #oscar piastri #oscar piastri fanfic #oscar piastri fluff #oscar pastry

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angelzai · 4 months

Note

Chuuya nsfw alphabet please

nsfw alphabet - chuuya nakahara . . . .ᐟ

NSFW CONTENT - MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!

wc: 2.2k

cw: gn!reader - no explicit anatomy mentioned, dom!chuuya, experienced!chuuya, nicknames (baby, doll, sweetheart), marking, unprotected sex, graphic descriptions of cum, cum swallowing, mentions of public/semi-public sex, mirror sex, praise, nipple play, finger sucking, teasing, dirty talk, references to overstim and light bondage

reid: your mind anon. this was so embarrassingly easy to write. for all intents and purposes osamu dazai is my pookie my snookums my dearest my darling my one true love but damn i do kind of want his boyfriend too. enjoy

. . . .ᐟ

a = aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

a is for attentive, actually

chuuya’s a gentleman. it’s whatever you want. the whole nine yards.

you want cuddles? conversation? a massage? a shower? a towel? music? tv? your hair braided or played with? wipes? water? wine? a cigarette? silence? sleep? the first thing he says after he lets you ride out your final orgasm is always “what can i do for you, baby?”

if his busy schedule allows, he prefers most to settle in and be in silence with you, soak in your presence, and just breathe you in until you both fall asleep

b = body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

probably his neck or his hips and waist, since those are where and how you pull him further into you; mark him up in these spots, please <3

he loves those parts of himself also because you can lock your thighs/calves/ankles around him so easily and wonderfully

that being said, chuuya worships your thighs. always grabbing them, squeezing them, clawing them, smacking them, kneading them, gripping them, kissing them, biting them. i am a thigh man chuuya truther

c = cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

pretty and almost translucent spurts

lives and breathes to pump you full <3

please let him cum down your throat

will have you stick your tongue out to make sure you swallowed all of him (watching you do this will get him hard again instantly)

d = dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

wants to fuck you in a meeting so badly

preferably one he’s heading

doesn’t want to bring it up for fear of making you uncomfortable, even if you’re okay with public sex - he doesn’t know how you’d feel about him taking you in front of people you vaguely know

but the thought of sitting you on his cock and making you try to stay quiet and still in a room full of his subordinates? unnnghhhhhsnnn

he cannot let himself think about it or he’s bricked immediately

e = experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

i think he’s got a good bit of experience! definitely not trying to push my manwhore chuuya agenda

doesn’t really know how many people he’s fucked, doesn’t really think it’s relevant information. what’s important is that he knows what to do with it

he’s the type to have a one night stand from months ago still trying to get his number. that’s how good he fucks

even if it’s casual or even if it’s rough, he has a way of making sex feel so comfortable and passionate

literally husband dick

f = favorite position (this goes without saying)

anything that optimizes how deep he can go <3 doggy, mating press, hot seat . . .

9/10 times there is a pillow beneath your hips

specifics aside, he just really loves having your legs over his shoulders

g = goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

he is not goofy.

at least, not in a deliberate, ironic way. if you’re laughing in bed, it’s a breathless giggle because everything he does is so charming or dreamy or romantic

h = hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

a true ginger call him fire crotch when he’s already mad and watch smoke literally come out of his ears anyway

he prefers to shave everything except for a little patch that connects to his happy trail <3

he doesn’t care what you do. man is thrilled to traverse the jungle if it means he gets to taste you

i = intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

again, even if it’s just a hookup, he has a certain charm and natural way of making sex feel so special . . . so imagine what he’s like in a committed relationship. i’m foaming at the mouth

does he fuck or does he make love? how about both every single time. he just takes such good care of you, whether that means setting the bar for your wedding night or throwing you around and destroying your insides <3

extremely attentive to your actions and reactions. will come to understand the sounds you make almost like a language of its own and he is fucking fluent

j = jack off (masturbation headcanon)

looks so alarmingly beautiful while he does it.

long, languid strokes while he runs his other hand through his hair

his abs flex and twitch and sometimes his tongue lolls out a little while his mouth falls open and his head tips back to let the prettiest moans leave him

doesn’t masturbate often with you around; when he does it’s usually so you can sit across from him and watch while you touch yourself, too <3

k = kink (one or more of their kinks)

mirror sex

praise

nipple play

finger sucking

biting/marking

put it all together, and . . .

imagine the arc in your back while he fucks you from behind against the bathroom sink. you better not take your eyes off yourself, he tells you. and you can’t even protest to tell him he’s too gorgeous for you to only watch your own reflection because he’s got his middle and index finger pressing down on your tongue while his thumb holds your jaw firmly in place. his other hand reaches around you to alternate between your nipples - he tweaks them, flicks them, rolls them between his fingers and leaves it to you to hold yourself up while he does this, all while he sinks his teeth into your shoulder and groans all gravelly and hot into your ear about how filthy you sound, how good you’re being, how tight you feel, how perfect you are.

l = location (favorite places to do the do)

his office hands down

a little bit of an exhibitionist

it goes hand in hand with letters d and q - the looming threat of maybe getting caught balls deep in you drives him crazy

big fan of your/his bedroom too - allows him a pleasure that sex in his office does not, which is your loud and uninhibited moans and mewls <3

m = motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

seeing you in any of the expensive clothes he buys you!!!

he of course keeps your taste in mind when he shops for you, but at the end of the day he’s buying you that high-waisted pant/button up shirt/platform shoe combo because he knows your ass is gonna look delectable in it

would also love to have you wear a chain with his initial on it - whether it’s a necklace, bracelet, anklet . . . catching a glimpse of it dangling off you from the right angle has him dragging you off to fuck so he can bite it between his teeth while he’s in your guts <3

n = no (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

chuuya will scarcely let you dominate him. he’s not completely opposed to it all of the time, but it’s a little more vulnerable than what he prefers. plus he likes his control, even - no, especially when he’s letting you think you have the reins

understands and values the psychological importance of aftercare - he never doesn’t do it.

o = oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

chuuya loves seeing you on your knees for him.

loves making you suck his fingers like you would his cock before he actually lets you on him.

he doesn’t need to fuck your face - all he needs is your dedicated tongue on his tip, a hand on his balls, maybe a finger or two in or around his hole . . . ugh he busts so fast

referring to c - bonus points if you swallow every last drop of his cum <3

talks you through it deliciously

“that’s it, doll, wanna see you work for it.”

“eyes up here, baby, look at me.”

“you’re gonna swallow all this cum, ‘kay?”

he returns the favor eagerly, don’t you worry

an absolute animal when he’s going down on you. his nails in your hips, his hands gripping your thighs, his fingers playing with you when he’s not spreading you apart

eats you like he’s starving and will not stop even after you cum.

p = pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

he’s all over the place.

he’s really good at slow and sensual foreplay, but when he’s actually in you or tasting you he can’t hold himself back

whewwww you both gonna be sweating.

tries to save slow, sensitive sex for special occasions . . . but he usually builds up to fast, frantic fucking anyway

passion on 100 regardless. he is going to take you to heaven

q = quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

loves. loves loves loves loves loves.

loves sitting you on the kitchen counter and cumming in you before he leaves for work

loves sneaking away with you on his breaks to rail you in a supply closet

loves seeing how many times he can make you cum before the meeting he has to be at in twenty minutes

loves bending you over his desk like he doesn’t have a few of his subordinates on their way up to his office to drop off a report

loves bouncing you up and down on his cock in the car ten minutes before your dinner reservation

truly whenever he can. chuuya <3’s quickies

r = risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

he’s down to try anything once, period.

communication is the most important thing to him - experimentation and risks just need to be discussed beforehand

s = stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

he can go three or four rounds at a time, each lasting anywhere from less than 10 to up to 30 minutes; he’s usually pretty impatient to see you falling apart on him <3

it’s a different story if he’s only going down on you. he can do it for hours. you’ll lose track of time, numbers, colors, your own name and birth date etc

t = toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

chuuya definitely owns some high quality rope and a pair of thigh-to-wrist cuffs <3

for you, of course.

he doesn’t get tied up unless you really, really beg him

will occasionally let you tie his wrists while you ride him <3

u = unfair (how much they like to tease)

likes to tease you verbally more than he does physically.

he’ll try to hold off on making you finish, he really will! but most of the time he just can’t help giving you what you want.

what he’ll do is make you cum for a third or fourth time with hardly any effort and then throw it in your face - “so needy for me, huh?” “barely takes anything to have you squirtin’ all over me.” “think you can give me a couple more, doll?”

v = volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

can’t help the fact that he whimpers.

so much pretty, breathy whining and cursing - it almost takes the bite out of his domineering sometimes . . .

(lots of “ah- ah! fuck, fuck, fuck fuck f- fuck! y- yes, ugh . . .”)

. . . but he makes up for it with how his voice drops almost an octave when he talks

big talker.

“swear you were made f’me.”

“fuckin’ take it, sweetheart. doin’ so good.”

“ngh, fuck- gonna make you cum all over this dick.”

so much of your name <3

w = wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

sometimes he’ll cum so hard he blacks out for a few seconds. that’s all <3

x = x-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

thick.

like a fucking can of coke bitch.

6.5-almost 7 inches hard, curves upward the tiniest bit, pretty and tan with a sensitive red tip

v-line to fucking die for.

y = yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

higher than a goddamn kite

he is down to fuck you 24 hours a day 7 days a week 365 days of the year for as long as you’ll let him

just. insatiable. so greedy. takes everything you give him every single time and eats it up. cherishes it like keepsake. burns it into his mind and thinks about it at work the next day and gets himself so horny he’ll have to jerk off in the bathroom and send you a picture with the tagline “look what you do to me”

z = zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

it just depends if he’s sleepy or not! he absolutely can stay awake, get up and moving, go back to work, whatever

but as mentioned before it is his favorite thing to do after - if he’s sleepy, you’re sleepy, and his chaotic life graces him with the time and peace, he will fall asleep with you in his arms so fast.

regardless, he’s so clearheaded after you make each other cum <3 he just adores you so much

#bsd x reader #bungou stray dogs x reader #bsd chuuya x reader #chuuya nakahara x reader #chuuya x reader #chuuya smut #chuuya nakahara smut #bsd smut #bungou stray dogs smut #angelzai original.ᐟ #devilzai hours.ᐟ #mdni

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bigassmoonchild · 8 months

Text

Talk

Pairing: Simon 'Ghost' Riley x Reader

Word Count: 2.6k

The previous part gives context for this story. Please read it so you aren't confused on anything. The rest isn't necessary.

Summary: Nothing had ever hurt you this bad. Your Alpha walked out on you, the only thing you could think was that your Alpha had abandoned you and your pup. And all you could think about was the pain you'd gone through because of it. Simon wasn't in any better shape.

Content Tags: Hurt, Mild Comfort, Angst, Ghost is shit at communicating, And shit with emotions, Price is the voice of reason, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alpha! Ghost, No use of Y/N

A/N: I got sick and my sinuses are shot. Here's some more Maple Syrup, feel free to send in asks or request to be added to the tag list. As always, content under the tag and my asks are open <3.

Part 1 | Previous, Next | Headcannons, Masterlist

The second you heard the door open, you'd spun. It hadn't been seconds since you made your announcement to the hearing committee when Simon walked out. You could feel your heart sinking and your eyes moved to find Price, who was staring back after him. You could hear murmurs from the committee and you turned to look at them.

"This hearing is dismissed. When we receive the results, we will meet back then. Until then, you and Mr. Riley will no longer be separated. We will send you a message once we receive the results," you nodded, looking back before picking up your things.

As you walked out, Price pulled you to the side. You could feel your throat closing, your eyes watering as you stood there. Your Alpha walked out on you, hearing you might be pregnant. He walked out on yourself and your pup.

"You didn't tell him?"

"How the hell was I supposed to tell him?" You growled at Price. "Homing pigeon?" He scoffed, looking away. "We were both babysat 24 hours a day, Price, there was literally no way for us to talk," you shook your head, looking away, a few tears falling from your eyes.

Price pulled you into him, resting his chin on yours. "I'm sure he left to think. He's probably just as overwhelmed as you, I'll try to find him so I can talk to him," Price whispered to you, rocking the two of you side to side.

Quite honestly, you were terrified. All you could think was that your Alpha didn't want you anymore, that he would find out how to break your bond and do it so he didn't have to deal with you. At some point, Price had led you to your room and left you alone.

You'd moved to lay in your nest but saw all of Simons shirts and hoodies still in there. Sitting on your bed, you stared at it, debating on whether or not you take them out. You could feel the tears pouring down your face, heart dropping in your stomach as you thought about it.

He really didn't want you, did he? He hadn't lied when he initially said it was a mistake, everything had been a lie, was his name really Simon? All you knew was his face and his code-name, and all you could do was sit there, silently crying. You could feel your muscles tensing and untensing, body shaking.

And so you moved, grabbing his clothes and other items you had collected of his and pulling them out of your nest. When you got halfway through, you'd broken down, sobbing.

Alpha hates you.

You felt like you were going to throw up, you could hear whines coming from your chest. You dug through it, though, tossing his clothes out of your nest and finding some of your own shirts and blankets you had stockpiled for this exact reason.

Rebuilding your nest had never been harder. It was supposed to be where you and Si- Ghost would have slept, where you would have taken care of your pups. It was where you were supposed to grow old, where you'd eventually pass together.

Apparently, he didn't want any of that. Did he ever? You didn't want to think about this anymore, and so you curled up in your nest and tried to sleep it off, but how could you? You wanted to leave. Really, really badly.

There was nowhere to go, but you needed to move. You got up and left the room, walking through the halls as you moved aimlessly. You wanted nothing more than to curl up with your Alpha but all you knew was that he didn't want you.

You found yourself in the rec room the 141 often used and Soap and Gaz stared at you. You knew you looked horrible, hair beyond fucked and face puffy from the crying. Jesus, how many times would this man make you cry like this?

"What happened?" Soap went up to you, pulling you to sit between him and Gaz on the couch before grabbing you a glass of water. "Why're ye crying?"

"Ghost," and Soap scoffed, Gaz laying himself across you, trying to get you to relax and Soap moved next to you, forming a small pack pile. You were hiccupping as you cried, trying to get through the sentence. "Fucking walked out of the hearing room after I said I might be pregnant to the committee just to get his ass outta trouble," you could hear them groan, felt them chuffing (and you thought you heard purring from one of them) against you to try and soothe you.

No matter what, you'd integrated yourself into Ghosts pack and he wouldn't be able to get rid of you. "It'll be alright. He's just in his head," you could feel the tears drying again as the noises surrounding you calmed you somewhat.

Without your Alpha, though, you weren't sure what to do. You'd be tossed to the side, any Omega who was abandoned by their Alpha was deemed disgusting. A waste. Someone who wasn't worth a pack, someone who would have to work little jobs to just survive. Someone who could get taken without anyone noticing.

Just another body on the streets trying to get by. You didn't want that, especially if you were actually pregnant with a pup. Your Alpha was supposed to be by your side no matter what, he was supposed to help you when you needed it and you were supposed to care for him.

Ghost didn't want you. He would get rid of you, he would leave you on the streets and would get rid of your bond mark, would take a better Omega. Find someone better. Find someone who was worthy of his bite, someone who wouldn't drop bombs on him without at least trying to alert him to what was happening.

You didn't know it, but you'd fallen asleep at some point, waking up to see Simon sitting across from you. Price was there, arms crossed and leaning against the wall as the two waited for you to wake up.

"You'll need to talk," Price said.

Simon was still walking outside when he smelled Price not too far from him. He paused, turning back and watching as he caught up, falling in pace together and just walking. Price checked his watch, pulling a cigar out of his jacket pocket and lighting it.

"I don't think you realize how hurt your Omega is," Price said around the cigar, smelling the anger and distress in Simons scent spiking. He let out a grunt, hands stuffing themselves in his pockets. "Walking out wasn't the best choice. The boys have her in a pack pile, they're trying to soothe her for you," he added, seeing Simons eyes flicker to him for a moment.

With a shrug, Simon looked away. "Doesn't matter to me, I don't want to be a father," that wasn't true. Simon knew it, and Price would eventually find that out too. Simon wanted to be with his Omega, scent her when he could.

"They rescinded the babysitters, you know," all Simon wanted to do was curl up in your nest with you, scent marking you all over and remarking you. It'd been nearly a month since he was last able to, and that's all that he wanted.

Price sighed, grabbing his arm to pull him to a stop. Simon looked away, tugging his arm out of Price's hold. He pulled a cigarette out, tugging his balaclava up enough for him to get his mouth on it and then lighting it, inhaling deeply before pulling it out of his mouth.

The two stood, staring at the squads doing drills in the distance. They didn't say anything, just existing together, both deep in thought.

Simon wanted to find you and apologize, he wants to comfort you. He wants to hold you and hide you away with him so nothing like this ever happens again.

He wants a life with you, a home to go to when you two could get leave. He wants pups, he wants to see you round after he was able to breed you good and hard. He wanted to be there for you, take care of you in and out of your heat, he wanted to take you on dates and get to know you better.

He wanted to meet your family.

Price was watching him, the gaze Simon had was distant. Eyes unblinking and staring through people rather than at them. Price almost knew exactly what Simon was thinking, having gone through just about the exact same thing.

Not same circumstance, but same thought process. I can't have pups, I'll turn out like they think I will. I'll end up hurting them, they're too good for what I do. I can't put them in danger because they have no choice. It was horrible to think about it, but even Price thought of leaving his Omega.

Dropping everything and running, leaving all the money he had saved up with his Omega to care for their pup. But he didn't, he found people to talk to and was able to get through it. Simon needed that person, and god be damned he would be it.

"Talk with her, you need to figure out what you're going to do. I have pups of my own, I promise you that there is nothing this military won't do to keep them safe," he said, pulling Simons out of his thoughts.

Simon shook his head, opening his mouth to speak before Price cut him off.

"I am telling you this because I went through the same thing. You have people around you to help, you won't turn out the same father you think you will. Things happen, and you'll figure it out as you go," Price said and he could see as Simons face fell, realization of his actions finally hitting him.

He abandoned his Omega, and all he wanted to do was fix it. Fix his mistakes and make sure that you would never be hurt how he just hurt you. There was nothing he wouldn't do to fix this, and he would fix this.

Price led him to where you'd been, Soap having left him a message that you were with him and Gaz well before he'd found Simon. He knew that they would be short with Simon, he knew that they wouldn't want to leave you.

So he'd made them leave. Told them that he would be standing right there and wouldn't let anything happen. Had to make sure that they knew that you would be safe.

You didn't look at Ghost. Your eyes finding more interest in the carpet, or the wall by Price. Neither of you talked for a few long moments, you didn't want to say anything and Ghost wasn't sure what to say.

"I'm sorry," was all he said and your wrist found your gland, rubbing harshly against it. You could smell his distress, watching you scent yourself. All you could tell was that he didn't seem like he regretted anything. "I'm so scared," it was nearly a mockery of those words you'd used with him when trying to figure out what would happen next after you'd been bonded to him.

He could smell distress on your scent after he said that, head dropping down as he slowly realized what he'd said. "I didn't know what to do, I don't know how to be a parent," he whispered to you.

"And you think I do?" You hissed at him, legs pulling into your body as you wound your arms around them. "You think I'm not just as scared? I'm here, trying to help you get out of this mess you're in, and you're just abandoning me?"

He didn't look at you, not at all. Not a glance, all he could do was scent the different emotions flowing through you.

He opened his mouth again. "I didn't have a good family life, so I don't know how to go about all of it," he explained shortly. "I don't know what to do," he whispered softly.

You finally looked at him, his eyes downcast and his shoulder slumped in, elbows on his knees. You could taste the hurt in his scent, but you didn't want anything to do with it.

Alpha walked out on you.

"I just want to fix what I did,"

"I don't know if you can."

His eyes shut tight, jaw clenching as the hurt in his scent became all you could taste. His hands were shaking and you were just looking at him.

"You've hurt me so much, Ghost, and I can't always let you get away with it," you explained, fingers pulling at the skin near you nails. "I can't keep going through this up and down with you, it's not healthy," there was almost nothing you could say. Nothing you could think that he could do to get back to where he'd been.

"Just let me try, it's all I need," you looked at Price, who had a solemn look on his face. You could see it in his face, the faint whispers of let him try coming off of him. You didn't know what to do. "I can start over again, I'll court you again just tell me what I can do to fix it,"

You had to blink tears out of your eyes. You wanted to curl up with Alpha, let him hold you in your nest and sit there and be safe with him. You wanted to go back and take everything you'd said back. You wanted to restart. You wished you could have, you regretting this, you wanted to change that.

All you could do was shake your head, looking away. "I honestly don't know," you whispered, voice cracking. "I'm so beyond hurt right now, and you're the only person responsible for it," he looked up at you, eyes watery as panic became evident.

He looked away, you could see his throat working as he swallowed.

"Are you regretting this?" He asked and you felt your heart drop. Your brows furrowed, you wished you could go back and change things you'd done, but did you regret being mated with him?

"No," and it was nothing short of the truth. You genuinely cared for him, maybe not love, but he was your Alpha. You didn't want to change anything about it. "You're my Alpha, and I wouldn't change that for anything. I just don't know what to do to fix this pain," your voice grew distant, eyes gazing away from him.

He cleared his throat, leaning back. "I understand," he whispered. "I just regret what I've done. I didn't mean to hurt you, but I didn't know what to do," you couldn't look at him, the pain in his voice was already hurting you more than him walking out.

"I don't know what to do, either, but we can't keep doing this back and forth. We can't keep running from our problems," he nodded, clearing his throat.

He stood, wiping his hands on his pants. "I'll be in my room, if you need anything," he nodded to Price and walked out. You couldn't say anything, the only thing you wanted to do was climb back into your nest and try and forget everything that happened.

When you got back to your room, you sat on your bed and stared at the clothes from Simon you'd gotten that you'd scattered around the room. You picked them up, folding them and placing them on the desk in the corner of your room, hands not being able to leave the hoodie on top.

It was the most recent clothing item you'd had, and still had traces on his scent over it.

You put it back in your nest.

Tag List:

@sae1kie

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coffearabica · 1 year

Text

your words, princess|xavier thorpe

synopsis: xavier wants you to say it

!includes!: soft/dom xavi, teasing, cockwarming if you angle your phone the right way, literally just smut on smut

note: help this is so bad ive literally never written smut this explicit asldkfd also the ending is soo bad. aged up obviously <3

word count: 0.898k

He was slow as he moved, every flick of his tongue savoring and every brush of his fingers lingering. It drove you crazy in the same way it liquified your bones.

“Xavier.” you sighed, legs curled around his hips as his head dipped below your collar bones. It was so easy to get lost in him. Every wet kiss against your skin was anticipated, your core tightening with every huff of cool air brushing against the wet spot he'd leave behind. He hums as his hands tighten around your wrist, where he has them locked in place above your head.

“You feel so good, baby.” he breathes, movements gentle and rocking. “So, so good.” the bed creaks, the sheets rustle, and outside the dark clouds gently grumble. His hip bones meet your inner thighs over, and over, and over again. He’d leave bruises for him to kiss in the morning, but for now, masked by darkness, you were his to do as he pleased with.

“Please,” you gasped, back arching when he hit that spot. He smiled down at you, your breasts offered before him like a gift. He pulls back, lowers his mouth, thrusts back in, and sucks you into his mouth. “Fuck!’

“Hmm.” he moans out, knowing you’ll feel it in places he couldn’t physically reach. You thrash a bit, turning your face into your arm, legs slipping down his waist, and hips moving on their own accord. He loves it, seeing you so vulnerable before him. So needy for him.

“What do you want, baby?” he licks a stripe between your breasts, all the way up to your jaw. You turn back to him, eyes shut and lips searching for his. He kisses you, only a quick peck that you meet with a frown. He’s slowed almost to a complete stop now.

“More.” you whine.

“More?” He nudges your cheek with his nose. You turn again, wanting so badly to kiss his lips before you screamed. But he pulls away again.

“Xavier,” you drag his name out, tugging on your hands but he only tightens his grip.

“Your words, princess. I want to hear exactly what it is you want from me.”

When your eyes open all you see is him and for a moment you’re reminded of just how big he is. Tall and lean, his shoulders span across you with one arm slipped underneath your back and the other bounding your hands. Every inch of him rubbed against you and every breath you took reminded you of how badly you needed him to move.

“Hi, pretty.” he smiles and pecks your lips again, parts of him amused by the frustration in your eyes. “You wanna tell me now?”

With a huff and a glare you pick your head up, getting as close to him as you could, “I want you to make me come with your cock.”

The dirty words coming from such soft and sweet lips was like electricity in his blood. Both of you could feel him pulsing from deep inside you and when your legs wrapped around him again, ankles digging into the backs of his thighs and driving him back in the last few inches, he sees and feels nothing but burning, white pleasure.

“Fuck, baby. You’re perfect.” His lips smash down onto yours, teeth knocking and tongues battling. He begins moving again, his dick sliding in and out slowly at first before he begins picking up pace, leaving you to groan into his mouth. “Whatever you want,” he pants between kissing you, “I’ll give it to you, baby. Whatever-”

His words die on a gasp when your insides tighten, his hips stutter and his head falls into your neck. He doesn’t even hear the gentle moans falling from his mouth, doesn’t register that his hold on your wrists has loosened. It isn’t until your fingers thread through his hair and tug and that same blinding pleasure surges through him.

“You feel so good,” he repeats. “You know how to make me feel so good, only you.” He speaks into the junction of your neck.

The words send another ache through you, this one so intense that your vision shifts and when he slams into you at a particular angle it reaches its peak.

“Xavier!”

“”Fuck yeah, come on my cock, pretty girl.” he picks himself up and moves over you until your legs fall away from him. Until you're a quivering mess and the sight of you all flushed and sweaty and sated has his lower back tingling and soon his own head falls between your breasts as he pours endless spurts into you.

There's a brief silence filled with nothing but your heavy breaths. His damp forehead rests against your sternum as you brush his hair away from his face. It isn’t until he drops a kiss across your chest, then up to your chin that his eyes meet yours.

“Hi.” His grin is dopey and infectious.

“Hi.” You smile back and he drops his mouth to kiss it.

“I think this was my favorite time.”

“You say that every time.” your eyes roll.

“Can’t get enough of you.” he wiggles his brows, proud of the giggle that escapes you.

He doesn’t move and you don’t tell him to, he simply lays back across your chest as your fingers find their place in his hair once more.

#xavier thorpe #xavier thorpe smut

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amourdivine · 2 months

Text

୨ ♡ ୧︰ WHOSE MIND ARE YOU ON? ઉ PAC.

Hello, angels! I hope you're doing well! Today, I bring to you one of my favorite reading topics. Let's get curious and see whose mind are you on, shall we? If you liked this reading, please consider tipping me at @ [email protected] via paypal! xo ♡

› none of the images are mine unless stated otherwise. › personal readings are closed [as of february 2024] › navigation ♡ masterlist ♡ payhip

HOW TO CHOOSE YOUR PILE. take a few deep breaths and look at each picture separately. see which one brings you to a feeling, a place or a memory. take your time and feel free to come back to it later!

amourdivine. 2021 - 2024 © do not copy, redistribute or edit my content.

୨୧ PILE ONE

ace of pentacles ✧ the tower ✧ two of wands

Oh, this is someone whom you've had a huge falling out with. The aftermath has left both of you scarred, the foundation of your connection has crumbled, but both of you still check up on one another. For one half of this pile, this is purely platonic, like an ex friend or co-worker. For the other half, this was a friends with benefit situation... feelings made things even messier and the two of you got caught up in a thunderstorm.

Regardless, this person holds so much love and so much hatred inside their heart. They're so angry, but they miss you so much. They look at your old photos, reminisce on old memories. I just saw a best friend necklace in my mind's eye. They want to talk to you, but in that exact same second, they are reminded that things aren't that way anymore. It pains them, it ails them.

They likely write about you in the form of poetry, maybe journaling. They listen to songs about you, maybe even watch or read tarot readings in the hopes of finding closure. I genuinely don't think this person means any harm towards you, you're just both incredibly hurt by one another and I think distance has done you well so far. The waters need to calm down before the two of you can talk again, feelings need to be addressed and processed before you can cross paths.

This person misses you so badly, but I think the thought of this connection still brings up a lot of triggers to the surface. You may have some harsh aspects in synastry that create this tension or perhaps the two of you are fire signs. Sort of like a harsh Mars and Pluto aspect, but take it how it resonates. For your sake, it's important you address the feelings you have for this person (be it rage, hatred or love) so you don't feel trapped by this situation.

channeled messages and signs: best friend, betrayal, 10 of swords, "how could you?", "i stay up thinking of you", pinky promises, bikes, red sweater, october, insecure, competitive, jealous, leo, pick me, saturn, 333, 7, "you were mine".

୨୧ PILE TWO

the world ✧ the sun ✧ three of cups

Ah, this is someone who's away from you physically, but not emotionally. They love you so much. It's possible they have traveled for work or study temporarily, but they can't wait to come home to you, to be in your arms. It feels a mix of platonic and romantic energy, so please take it how it resonates. It could be someone who hasn't confessed their feelings to you verbally, but I think it's pretty darn obvious.

Either way, you make this person so happy, so giddy, so full of hope and love. You remind them that there are better times ahead and I think there's something about your smell, your embrace or smile that this person adores. You inspire them in so many ways, there's literally no one like you in this world. You're their favorite - and I think it's a mutual feeling here.

If this is someone whom you've met online, they're so eager to meet you. They probably daydream about it, they're taking active steps towards it too. They hope for ice cream-filled days under the sun and walking with you in the park. I feel very idyllic, it's wholesome and adventurous at the same time.

You bring a sense of courage and strength in this person, I think you're their "energy booster" in a way, either through your words or just who you are in general. You give this person a bit of a sweet, but fun adrenaline rush. They're so excited by the thought of you.

channeled messages and signs: cottagecore, wifey, strawberries, hot pink, neon green, astronomy, lauv, riding shotgun, roadtrip, plane flights, concert tickets, airports, "baby blue", kpop, "bestie", "bae".

୨୧ PILE THREE

ten of cups ✧ six of pentacles ✧ seven of swords (clarified by the two of cups)

This is someone well established and hardworking, someone who seems quite happy on the surface. They live in a shiny world, a perfect world. At least that's what it looks like on the surface.

This person is married and may have children already. You work with them, or under them. However happy or well-meaning this person may seem towards you, they are secretly very, very attracted to you. They want something more than professional or platonic with you, but they're keeping it under wraps right now.

I can't help but feel icky, like this person wants to have it all and that means going behind their partner's back in order to have you. I don't think they would ever come right and clean about this to anyone in this situation. You're like a shiny object this person wants to collect for themselves, but it's not like they'd care for you in any capacity. I Want it All by Arctic Monkeys started playing in my head. I think this is probably this person's view towards the world.

The Eight of Cups is at the back of the deck - be sure to not engage with this person emotionally, or any more than you already have. They're not honest about their feelings or intentions and it shows in the way they're sneaking around, while their partner's blissfully ignorant about it. Cheater, fuckboy energy!

channeled messages and signs: black and white, indie pop, millenial, 1989, 1990, power dynamics, chief, corporate nightmare, suits, fanfiction, beard, "don't look back", the fray, melancholia.

୨୧ PILE FOUR

five of cups ✧ seven of wands ✧ knight of swords

Whoever this is, I feel a more childish, impulsive energy. I don't know if this person is still in your life, but chances are they regret something they did or said to you. They're mourning your connection for the time being. I think you pulled away from them over a boundary they crossed or you stood your ground and they weren't expecting it. The friction here may not have been grand, but it was enough to make them feel guilty, regretful and even ashamed.

They're looking back on their actions and they're wishing they had a do-over. For some reason, I feel like this person is younger than you or just less experienced. They have a "younger sibling" feel to them, someone who's still a page. You were a source of stability and comfort to them, I think they still look up to you in some way, because I feel that they're ashamed over disappointing you.

However, as sad as it is, it doesn't seem like the end of your connection, for most of you. If this is a family member, like a cousin or sibling, chances are you'll both need to let this "marinate" and come back to talk about it later. They want to talk it out with you regardless, so it's not as definite as it may have seemed before. Even if you do have your guard up towards this person and vice-versa, give this connection a chance. I honestly feel like there's still a lot of love and admiration left between the two of you.

channeled messages and signs: "i wish you were here", victory, number 7, stubborn, "i'm the older one!", nitpicky, play-fighting, gossip, lullabies, bedtime stories, "i was trying to protect you", defensiveness, muddy waters, family portraits, petty, blocked.

୨୧ PILE FIVE

queen of pentacles ✧ the star ✧ five of pentacles ✧ three of wands

This is a motherly person. They could be an actual mother, an aunt, a grandma, or simply someone who embodies these nurturing traits, almost to the point of being a little overbearing. It can also be a "mom friend", someone who cares for others by giving them gifts. They're well established and might give unsolicited advice in regards to career, finances or relationships, but they mean well.

The reason why you're on this person's mind is because they're wishing you well. Maybe you suffered a loss recently, or you've been depressed and this person is hoping you can recover soon. I think you may have distanced yourself from others, but this person wants to help you. Still, they're waiting on you to reach out to them.

It's possible they've sent you flowers or "get well soon" texts and cards. I don't know why I get the feeling you were or are sick, struggling in some type of visible way and that's why they're worried. Maybe to you it doesn't seem like a big deal, but since this person is more experienced, they know how to deal with certain things and they really want to help you.

They might have offered you to stay at their place, or maybe have cooked you soup. I get very lovely, nurturing feelings from this pile. They wish you well and hope you can cheer up soon! For some, this is a person from your home country? You may be studying or working abroad and this mother figure wants you to take care of yourself. Aw!

channeled messages and signs: south korea, china, "i'm fine! i promise", subway, skip and loafer, exam season, 555, big city, hometown, missing the train, "i'm running late", overprotective, homemade meals, flu season, childhood movies, growing up, middle age crisis.

୨୧ PILE SIX

eight of cups ✧ eight of wands ✧ ten of swords ✧ the sun

This is such a back and forth energy, pile six. I won't lie, it feels difficult but exciting... but also really difficult? This person has been in and out of your life multiple times. You fight and then get back to each other. Then you fight again, going round and round.

It's interesting because The Sun is here, so you do make each other very happy, but you also make each other very miserable. I think this dynamic moved very fast unexpectedly. There's lots of attraction, but also lots of heartbreak. It could be a friends with benefits situation, maybe an ex you can't get over. I also heard "sneaky link" and the messages feel quite 18+, if you get what I mean.

You see, you enjoy this person's presence very much. Even when they tease you. And you've hurt each other many times, but I think you can't stop coming back to one another. There's this strange, unbreakable bond, but it's also a connection that triggers the both of you a lot and could've turned quite toxic.

This is the only pile where I had to pull more than four cards to channel the messages and I got the Queen of Wands. I think both of you are drawn to each other like moths to a flame, but there's some maturing needed if this connection is meant to progress. I didn't include advice in the previous pile, but the High Priestess came out for you as advice. So make sure to tune in to your emotions, your needs and how this person is engaging with you. Is this something truly fulfilling for you? How are you being called to step up your boundaries, your words and your actions? Connect to what you truly desire for yourself.

channeled messages and signs: "in my feels", drake songs, coquette aesthetic, water by tyla, pink hat, y2k, black girl magic, it girl, jennie kim, long hair, neon lights, freeze, nail art, "know your worth", boss, "cheer up buttercup", "you're so high maintenance", work crush, toxic by britney spears.

DISCLAIMER. Tarot is a divination tool, it’s not a substitute for medical and professional advice, nor is it meant to be taken as such. I don’t take responsibility for any choices made by you or others regarding my readings. Be mindful ♡

#pick a card #tarotblr #tarot reading #pick a card reading #tarot #pac reading #astrology #divination #pick a pile #tarot witch #witchblr #tarotcommunity #tarot readings #tarot readers #*#mine.

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caramelberzatto · 7 months

Note

Ooooohhhh could you maybe do Carmy jerking off and reader walking in? He’s embarrassed but she’s like yessss this is 🔥 🔥 🔥 and wants to watch? Thank you!

PLEASE- okay so i'm literally at work right now, on my day off, because i had shit-all else to do and my only friends are here. SO anyway, moving on, long story short, i'm getting some lunch and churning out some writing. i changed it a teensy bit because i wanted to write some needy carmy so bad heheheheh. let's fucking go (nsfw below, minors dni)

okay so we all know carmy is busy, and when he isn't busy, he's probably stressing about something. (which is very relatable, love that for us.) ANYHOW, he finally has a moment to himself. it's late, he's freshly showered, and all he wants is to climb into bed with you and touch you the way he knows you like. but, as fate would have it, you're not home, and he's sighing to himself after the memory of you mentioning some birthday dinner for your friends boyfriend returns to him.

'fucks sake,' he mutters to himself as he drops onto the couch, letting his head fall back, teeth gritted in frustration. running a hand through his still-damp hair, he thinks about calling it a night and just going to sleep. but he wants to wait up for you. and he just... really fucking needs you.

he heads down the hall to his bedroom, leaving his shirt on the floor by the foot of the bed. it's gotten warmer, or it could just be because the thoughts currently occupying his mind are... heated. regardless, he tosses back the covers and leans back against the headboard, trying to focus on literally anything but how badly he's craving you.

but he's failing. miserably. especially because your underwear are still on the floor from where he'd tossed them that morning when he'd woken you up with his tongue. and the memory your fingers tangled in his hair is so visceral, he swears he can almost feel it.

and before he can even register what he's doing, his hand has slipped beneath the waistband of his sweatpants and wrapped around his cock, already hard and aching. the relief is immediate, and he lets out a long sigh, his other hand gripping the duvet as he starts to pump himself.

it doesn't feel as good as you, though. not even when he spits on his palm, squeezing lightly around the base and running his thumb over the head the way you always do. and it's making him more and more frustrated with every underwhelming stroke.

he's all worked up, breathless and pissed off, and doesn't hear the door open, nor the thud of your shoes as you kick them off. you dump your bag on the couch, heading down the hall, and you can hear his quick, shallow breaths seeping out of the bedroom door left ajar.

the door creaks on its hinges as you push it open, stepping into the dimly lit room. and carmen is a fucking mess. his curls are plastered over his forehead, his cheeks, neck, and chest are blooming red and flushed, and his gaze meets yours instantly. his sweatpants sit halfway down his thighs, and his cock is in his hand, and he just looks so... pathetic. and you love it.

'fuck, baby, hi,' he says, and you're already climbing on top of him, into his lap, taking his cock in your hand. and the sounds he makes go straight your chest. having him like this, so needy and whimpering and just out of his mind... it's hot.

normally, carmy would be taking in the sight of you, marvelling at the pretty little dress you're wearing, asking you how your night was, but he's so close to begging it's almost overwhelming.

and when you tuck your underwear to the side, not bothering to get undressed, and sink down on him, carmy lets out a choked sound that seems to be a mix of your name and a long, low 'fuck.'

it doesn't take long before he's spilling inside you, and he might've been embarrassed about it if he wasn't so relieved.

#the bear #the bear fx #carmy berzatto #carmen berzatto #jeremy allen white #carmen berzatto x reader #carmy berzatto x reader #carmen berzatto x you #carmy berzatto x you #carmen berzatto smut #carmy berzatto smut

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backupblogforjg · 2 years

Text

We can love the person he has turned out to be without whitewashing the crappy things he has done

Guys, I know Darius is cool, but can we please stop victim-blaming Hunter and acting like the way even the good adults in his life treated him is NBD?

‘Cause I keep seeing a lot of “okay Darius was mean to Hunter at first, but Hunter was a brat who got the job because of nepotism, so...” comments.

And look, I really think people in general are hugely underestimating just how badly Hunter was screwed over not just by Belos but by *ALL* the adults around him.

1) Let’s start by establishing something first: Hunter was never a brat to anybody in the castle.

Now, to be clear, even IF Hunter had been a brat, people 30 years older than him should still have not made his bad situation worse. If there are two people, and one of them is an adult while the other is a kid, the adult is supposed to keep their cool even if the kid acts out. You can punch up but you can’t punch down.

But that point is moot because all the evidence we have points at Hunter being a little nerd who adored the adults around him and was desperate to please them.

Exhibit #1: Dana’s official art, where Hunter freaks out over being slightly less overworked because it will make Lilith hate him. Even with the mask, you can tell he has a frantic expression.

Exhibit #2: the Hunter’s Palisman Observation stream, when Hunter has a question and is looking for an answer, he reaches out to the Coven Heads to ask them. He sees them as wise and knowledgeable, and wants to learn from them. That makes it extra hurtful that “Darius ignored me, as per usual. Eberwolf hissed at me, also as per usual.”

Exhibit #3: in ASIAS, we learn that Hunter genuinely loves rules and authority. Does that sound like somebody who’d disrespect an adult in charge?

Exhibit #4: pretty much the entirety of ASIAS. The whole reason Hunter went to Hexside is because an adult who technically ranks below him gave him an order.

There is a grand total of TWO examples in the series where Hunter talks back to an adult.

The first one is when he sees Kikimora again after she tried to murder him.

Note that he never tells Belos what she did, even though he didn’t realise that she had recognised him by his burnt hair, so he thought that she had actually bought his “travellers found me” story and wouldn’t be able to respond to his accusations with any of her own. He could have easily thrown her under the bus, and actively chose not to, even after she almost killed him.

The second one is in ASIAS, where an angry Hunter confronts the Coven Heads after they rescheduled the meeting behind his back, right after they physically pushed him aside hard enough to almost make him fall and walked away smirking at his misery.

Note that, immediately after, he looks like this. Arguing with the Coven Heads makes him miserable. He doesn’t want to fight them. He’d much rather ask “how high” when they say “jump.” But they still casually assault him.

They all knew that Belos had given him the order to leads the meeting. And they knew that Belos is a control freak who is infamous for his lack of mercy. They knew that Belos would see their decision to reschedule as Hunter’s fault, even though they did it behind his back.

If you think he was being arrogant or whatever here, I want you to look me straight in the eyes and tell me that if your coworkers screwed you over in front of your infamously vicious boss and walked away smirking while pretending they can’t see you and literally pushing you around, you would totally keep your cool.

2) The nepotism excuse also doesn’t work.

Nepotism is supposed to make your life easier.

Hunter is a child covered in scars with huge eyebags and absolutely no social life whatsoever who rolls over and shows his neck the second an authority figure expresses any displeasure with him.

It’s plain to see that getting Belos’ “special treatment” is harming him.

Hunter eventually does pull out the “Belos’ nephew” card, in an attempt to get Darius to back off.

But by this point, he:

- knows he has disappointed Belos, something that he fears more than death (as per Eclipse Lake)

- has been assaulted by the other Coven Heads...

- ...who added insult to injury by pretending they couldn’t see him, really rubbing it in that they find him worthless

- and then Darius, a man twice his size and thrice his age, grabbed him, spun him around, and stole his clothes

Tl:dr: Hunter is not acting entitled here, he is acting *cornered*. He is lashing out because he is scared, and like any scared kid he is calling out to his “dad.”

And the moment Darius tells him that he has to earn his position as Golden Guard, Hunter immediately agrees to do anything. There is no entitlement there, only a desperate desire to be good enough.

3) On the Boiling Isles, a half-a-witch is at best a social outcast and at worst a target.

For starters, a half-a-witch can’t get an education. You have to be able to perform spells to be allowed to go to school.

Granted this is for Amity’s advanced class, but the idea is that you have to get there eventually, even if it takes you much longer than the gifted students. In order to go to Hexside, you must at least have the potential to use magic.

Before Luz came into the scene, glyphs were a forbidden knowledge that had been lost for hundreds of years. Add in that palismen are close to extinction, and there is simply no way for a half-a-witch to do magic.

So, you can’t go to school. But can you at least get a job?

Ah. No.

Eda gets robbed in public by an officer of the law, in plain view of a huge crowd, and their reaction boils down to “sucks to be powerless.”

A half-a-witch essentially has no rights. They are not treated as citizens. It’s completely legal to ban them from essential functions and to refuse them pay for their labor.

If Eda had not found the Selkiedomus’ treasure, she and her family would have starved.

The discrimination against magicless creatures is so bad that even Hooty, arguably the nicest character in the show, still expresses scorn for them.

Hunter wasn’t exaggerating in the slightest here.

Being magicless is basically the BI equivalent of being disabled in a society that actively favours eugenics.

4) So, what did Darius do that was so bad?

Now, before anybody takes this post as Darius bashing, I want to bring up why he did it.

- Darius was clearly traumatised by the death of his mentor...

- ...who not only died, but also died in circumstances that must have been highly suspicious at best, so that Darius never even got proper closure and has been living with that open wound for years...

- ...in addition to the fact that Darius is extremely protecting of his loved ones, so that he must have felt the urge to protect the memory and legacy of his mentor...

- ...and that’s made ten times more painful if the replacement, who acts like the antithesis of everything his beloved mentor stood for, looks almost exactly like his mentor.

Can you imagine the grief is somebody you love with all your heart dies, and then some time later they appear to come back as an insult to everything they were?

So, I’m not denying that Darius had his own reasons here, nor am I arguing that he is a terrible person.

In case you don’t know, I like Darius so much I wrote a meta titled “Why Darius is a much better person than Fandom gives him credit for.” I like the guy, okay?

Nevertheless, he almost caused irreparable damage.

One of the reasons Hunter is so desperately loyal to Belos, is that Belos is the only one who never looked down on him for his lack of magic.

Now of course the bitter irony here is that Belos is racist against witches.

But Hunter didn’t know that.

All Hunter knew was that every person he ever met thought he was worthless for the way he was born, *except* for Belos, who said he was special.

And what does Darius do? He goes and reinforces Hunter’s belief that nobody but Belos will ever accept him.

Now, we know that Darius wasn’t really talking about magic there. We don’t know if all grimwalkers lack magic or just Hunter, but either way, later context clues indicate that he was talking about “strength of heart” or something like that.

Nevertheless, he most definitely came across like he was saying that Hunter has no place in the EC because he has no magic.

And Darius is not stupid. He had to know what he sounded like. And he didn’t bother correcting Hunter’s assumption, let him believe that the problem with him were the circumstances of his birth.

Why did Hunter befriend the Emerald Entrails? Because he accidentally stepped on a griffon’s tail. It was sheer dumb luck. If Hunter had put his foot a couple of inches aside, he never would have met Willow.

If not for a single stroke of extraordinarily unlikely good luck, Hunter would have gone back to the castle more convinced than ever that Belos was the only person in the world who could ever give a damn about him, the only one Hunter could ever love and trust.

Darius’ words would have driven him even further into the grasp of his abuser.

This is on top of the fact that Hunter canonically reaches out many times to Darius and Eberwolf over the years, and they always responded by giving him the silent treatment. Again, “Darius ignored me as per usual, Eberwolf hissed at me also as per usual.” How can they blame him for being an ignorant fanatic, if they have systematically rebuffed any and all of his attempts to talk to the only people in the castle who are not Belos’ stooges?

And on top of the fact that “you always do as you are told” is one hell of a line to give a kid *who gets blades thrown at his face* if he says a single word Belos doesn’t like. Hunter’s devotion to Belos is also his shield from violent beatings. If Hunter ever acted “rebellious” to Belos, Belos wouldn’t just send him to his room without dinner.

5) Has Darius changed?

Duh.

6) So what’s the problem?

Remember when people were like “Amity is doing right by Willow now, but she still needs to apologise”?

And when people were like “Alador has finally started walking in the right direction towards eventually becoming a decent father for his kids, but the first step was admitting that he treated them horribly”?

As far as I know, nobody was like “Amity is cool now so there is no need for her to say sorry to Willow, and Willow kind of sucked anyway” or like “Alador is cool now so wtf does Amity have to bitch about and move his hand away, just hug it out and ignore the past”?

What this whole tl;dr essay boils down to, is that S3 needs to have a scene where the good adults in Hunter’s life acknowledge that they did him dirty, without excuses and without victim blaming.

That’s all.

#toh #the owl house #toh darius #darius deamonne #toh hunter #golden guard #hunter wittebane #hunter deamonne #eberwolf the huntsman #lilith clawthorne

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signedkoko · 2 months

Note

omggh iii! if your requests are still open, can i please request some headcannons with val, vox and lucifer being in love with an imp?? l love asmodeous and fizzy soooo yk yk

Lucifer | Valentino X Reader [Romantic]

In which they wall for a hellborn imp, which may not sit right with most higher beings of hell. Reader is genderneutral.

This guy is literally the king of hell, Lucifer himself

Whoever he wants to be seen with is up to him; he's more of a trendsetter than anything else

He loves you, you're so sweet, and you take care of him, so why would where you were born matter?

Even if met with backlash, he wouldn't respond to any of it because it was 'petty drama'

After all, hell is full of murderers, thieves, and cannibals—do we really draw the line at something as stupid as who can date who?

If anyone were to go after you for dating Lucifer, they'd be wiped out in a second

He won't let anyone think they have the right to decide what's best for him

Lucifer is very excited to see hell through your lens, though, and he will travel with you to your ring so he can meet those you grew up with

A lot of hellborns look up to you for breaking the barrier, too

For every demon that hates you, there are three that admire you

Valentino is a mess of a man, he's been in all sorts of controversies and ate them all up

He truly feels that a lack of regret and a surplus of confidence will get you anywhere, and there are so many ruined people who'll follow him despite his wrongdoings

So when word gets out that you're together—and that happens fast—it's not much of a big deal

Since when has Val been afraid to get close to hellborn? Never! The only thing that's new is his dedication to one

There will always be a few overlords or higher-ups that view it as 'dirty' or 'wrong', but when have they ever agreed with him?

And with it being public, it's not like they can blackmail him with the knowledge unless they straight up stole you from him

But he wouldn't let that happen, no, you are his and his alone, forever

If anyone insulted you so badly on the street, he would bury them.

Val only needs one thing to remain pure in his life, and that is you

Author's Note - I know you also wanted Vox but I actually had a oneshot requested of the same thing with him! You can find it here! And of course, thank you for requesting 🖤

#koko writez #hazbin hotel #helluva boss #hazbin hotel x reader #helluva boss x reader #reader insert #x reader #lucifer #lucifer x reader #valentino #valentino x reader

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manykinsmen · 6 months

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toro rosso reject to five time world champion, or, welcome to the meat grinder: a complete(ish) history of drivers maligned by the red bull family in f1

okay so with all the red bull propaganda floating around, i wanted to explain why that team in particular rubs me the wrong way in the most objective way that i can (i say most objective because i know it cannot be perfectly objective and also i do not want it to be. how we feel emotionally about things is important and i firmly reject any culture that insists that human suffering should take a backseat to pretty numbers). a lot of research went into this and the typing up of this post alone has taken me several days. i have striven for accuracy in my reporting of information, so please let me know if you spot anything incorrect or any typos surrounding dates/numbers.

i will also preface this by saying that no team in formula 1 is an emotionally healthy environment to be - fundamentally most motor racing shouldn’t be set up to have multiple driver teams (i will make an exception for series where they literally share or swap control of the car like endurance racing or extreme e). it doesn’t make sense and almost always ends badly. formula 1’s set up in this regard is the worst of the worst. i am also deeply critical of the entire concept of junior teams and driver academies, which, with a very small handful of exceptions, have been an unmitigated disaster and a breeding ground for psychological problems. this is across all teams that employ them, red bull, mercedes, mclaren and ferrari in particular. red bull operates the biggest machine in this regard, far eclipsing even mercedes, which creates a situation in which the problems of these systems play out on an industrial scale under their banner.

so let’s have a look in detail at the drivers that have succumbed to the red bull meat grinder, going all the way back to 2005. we'll do this mostly in bullet point form for my own sanity and i am going to give their ages at the time, because i wholeheartedly believe it is relevant, given that many of red bull's victims are very young drivers - all but four of them were under 25 when they raced for the red bull family in f1, and it is now widely understood that the human brain doesn't finish developing until after that age, leaving them particularly vulnerable to psychological and emotional strain. this is gonna be long, so buckle up.

a quick notice that we will only be covering individuals who have driven for red bull or toro rosso/alpha tauri in at least one f1 race, not any purely test or developmental drivers, anyone from exclusively from the feeder series or any other motorsports series. please bear in mind that there will be a whole host of other wronged individuals who exist in this category. we will be excluding david coulthard, mark webber, sebastian vettel, daniel ricciardo, max verstappen, sergio perez and yuki tsunoda as these drivers are either currently with red bull/alpha tauri, and therefore their story with them is not complete, or left/retired from them voluntarily, on (mostly) good terms which is not the norm. these individuals have been excluded as outliers. we will also not be talking about liam lawson as there is not enough information about his circumstances. we will also not be covering any unconfirmed rumours of stress-related alopecia afflicting multiple red bull family drivers.

content warning: some of this stuff is very upsetting and in many instances likely meets the definition of psychological/emotional abuse and workplace bullying. i will highlight which specific sections mention night terrors, eating disorders, suicidal behaviour, and the death of anthoine hubert, but please bear in mind that this entire document is varying degrees of unpleasant to harrowing.

a * indicates that driver holds at least one world championship in some form of motorsport series. ** indicates that they are an f1 race winner.

christian klien, red bull (2005-6), aged 22-23

klien was inherited by red bull from jaguar racing, which they bought out, whom he had raced for in his rookie season. it was a relatively unremarkable rookie season, though klien was noticed for his consistency in finishing, retiring just four times.

red bull replaced him after only three races with vitantonio liuzzi (this was because they had two drivers and only one seat, having signed both, - the other was occupied by veteran racer david coulthard - and couldn't decide which they wanted). they flip-flopped between the two drivers over the course of the '05 season.

despite this, klien scored points in two of his three races (the third being a dns with an electrical issue), and twice more over the season.

red bull subsequently bought out minardi, which they renamed toro rosso, to solve their three-driver problem and klien was confirmed for the red bull seat alongside coulthard for the '06 season.

klien qualified in the top 10 for the opening two races of the '06 season and scored points in bahrain. in malaysia he dnfed after colliding with kimi raikkonen. at this point he was viewed by red bull as failing to live up to the expectations of his much more experienced teammate (coulthard had been racing in f1 for twelve years at this point).

despite two further points finishes, mark webber (also more experienced that klien, racing for five years) was signed from williams for klien's seat in '07 before the end of the season and klien was sacked with three races to go, with reserve driver robert doornbos filling his seat.

klien declined a drive for red bull in the indycar series in the united states because he felt his formula 1 story wasn't yet over.

though he admits, he handled his sacking poorly, he has said in 2023: "there was so much going on behind [closed] doors that I was really, really frustrated with the situation and the way it [was] brought up to me, it wasn’t very nice."

he never raced in f1 again, though he was a reserve driver for honda, bmw sauber and hrt from 2007-10).

he went on to pivot to endurance racing, which he has had a long career in, continuing to present, and has written a monthly column for pitpass.com since 2012.

robert doornbos, red bull (2006), aged 26

doornbos originally raced in f1 for minardi alongside christijan albers in the '05 season.

when minardi was bought out by red bull to become toro rosso, neither driver retained their seat at the end of the '05 season. albers moved to spyker, whilst doornbos was left without a seat.

however, christian horner had been a previous team principal of doornbos in f3000 had been recently appointed sporting director of red bull and found doornbos a seat as red bull test/reserve driver.

he was promoted to the red bull second seat for the final three races of the '06 season following klien being dropped.

although he qualified in the top ten in his first race, he failed to bring home any points and was ultimately passed over for the '07 season in favour of mark webber.

doornbos has been quiet about his time at red bull.

he remained as red bull test driver for the '07 season, and raced in two seasons of champcar/indycar. he has been retired from racing since 2010.

vitantonio liuzzi, red bull (2005), toro rosso (2006-7), aged 25-27

we've covered much of liuzzi's story in covering klien's but here are a few extra details:

in the '06 season, liuzzi was given a seat in the newly created toro rosso team.

he scored the team's first points in an eighth place finish after a long battle with nico rosberg in a williams and david coulthard in a red bull (note that this is the standard that klien was failing to live up to in the same season).

liuzzi was confirmed for the '07 season, which went rather badly for him, including crashing into the "wall of champions" in Canada. liuzzi failed to score at all in the first half of the season and there was constant speculation that he and/or his teammate scott speed would be replaced by sebastian vettel and/or champcar champion sebastian bourdais.

after bourdais was announced to have been given the '08 drive in the mid-season, liuzzi's performances actually improved and in china, he overtook mark webber in the red bull to finish fifth.

liuzzi blames his sacking from toro rosso as a problem of too many people having the ear of didi mateschitz, red bull owner, particularly gerhard berger who owned a 50% stake. in 2023, he said: "actually, I stepped out of toro rosso because of berger. in 2007, for politics, he took me out of red bull. if not, i would have stayed there for a really long time. it was done in a bad way… it was really not a fair situation. it was a big shame." he has also been critical of the lack of clarity and constant changes of which criteria were used to judge the drivers' performances.

liuzzi went on to race for force india and hrt between 2008 and 2012, before moving to the superstars series, gt series and eventually formula e.

liuzzi has been retired from racing since 2017.

scott speed, toro rosso (2006-7), aged 23-4

scott speed was a divisive presence in f1, given that he routinely went on the verbal offensive with other drivers and his own team. much of this was attributed to a brash american attitude, though scott has later come out to say that he regrets his behaviour, which he says was a result of the stress he was under at the time.

speed drove for toro rosso in the '06 season, having been a test driver for red bull in '05 at the canadian grand prix. his early races went poorly, with a 13th place finish in bahrain and a retirement with a clutch failure in malaysia.

in the australian grand prix, it looked briefly like speed had scored his first points before he was given a twenty-five second penalty for overtaking under yellow flags, dropping him out of the points from ninth. he was also fined $5000 for using inappropriate language to david coulthard during a hearing with the FIA.

at the french grand prix, speed suffered back pain and breathing problems as a result of a friday practice accident, but raced regardless.

despite a terrible season in which he scored no points, and which saw wild speculation of his replacement, speed was signed again for the '07 season, despite klien not even being offered the demotion to toro rosso.

speed's '07 season was similarly disappointing, with two separate collisions with alexander wurz (who you might remember as current gdpa chair).

the european grand prix would be his last race with the team. it ended in him spinning off in the wet. there were unconfirmed reports afterwards of a physical altercation with franz tost, toro rosso team principal, which tost has always denied. speed accused the team of wanting to get rid of both himself and liuzzi.

despite things seeming to calm down over mid-season testing, at hungary '07, it was announced that speed would be replaced by sebastian vettel.

speed reportedly said that "no amount of money" would see him work with red bull again, but in 2008 he went on to drive for red bull in nascar (it is unclear if he meant red bull in f1 or red bull more broadly). he has also called his contract with toro rosso "absurd" in an episode of beyond the grid.

he raced in nascar until 2013 and has since raced in both rallycross and formula e. he briefly attempted to raced in the indianapolis 500, before deciding that it was too dangerous following the death of his friend dan wheldon. he has not raced since 2021 and now hosts the red bull podcast.

sébastian bourdais, toro rosso (2008-9), aged 29-30*

bourdais' initial foray into the world of formula 1 came before his champcar success, in 2002, with tests for both arrows (who were on the verge of bankruptcy) and renault, where he was ultimately passed over in favour of franck montagny.

he returned to f1 in 2007, gaining several tests with toro rosso after his fourth consecutive champcar title, which would unify with indycar in 2008.

in 2008, he was announced as teammate to sebastian vettel at toro rosso. in his debut race, despite qualifying seventeenth, he managed to overtake his way into fourth place before his engine failed with three laps remaining. having completed more than 90% distance, he was classified eighth and later inherited seventh after rubens barrichello was disqualified.

bourdais went on to bring home points again at belgium, where he qualified ninth, held onto fifth for most of the race and was briefly third, before toro rosso made an incorrect strategy call to stay on dry weather tyres and he was overtaken by several drivers on wets, leaving him seventh. bourdais was visibly close to tears after the race.

at italy, he qualified fourth, but a grid-box problem saw him forced to start from the pitlane. despite being lapped by his teammate, he set the second-fastest lap of the race. in japan he was the victim of a controversial fia penalty (few commentators agreed with it) for causing a collision with felipe massa and was dropped from sixth to tenth (then out of the points). this was, in fact, so controversial after a string of bad fia calls throughout the season that they were forced to release "stewards only" footage to justify the decision. many, including martin brundle, still believed that massa should have been penalised instead.

bourdais was confirmed for toro rosso in the '09 season alongside rookie sebastien buemi, replacing sebastian vettel moving up to red bull following david coulthard's retirement.

despite two points finishes, buemi outscored bourdais and impressed the team greatly. bourdais later struck buemi's car at the spain gp, taking evasive action from a spinning jarno trulli, forcing the retirement of both cars. he then collided with kovalainen in britain and suffered mechanical failure in german, after qualifying last by over a second.

in july, toro rosso announced that bourdais would be replaced by jaime alguersuari for the hungarian grand prix and onwards, with franz tost saying that bourdais had "not met expectations". bourdais had a viable case to sue toro rosso for breach of contract, who later settled with him for $2.1 million to avoid litigation.

bourdais has largely been quiet on his time as part of the red bull family, but has recently accused the team of "poor sportsmanship" and "dirty tactics" in their use of second-driver sergio perez.

following his retirement from formula 1, bourdais has competed in multiple le mans series races, including winning the 24hrs of le mans in 2016. he also returned to indycar and is currently racing in imsa sports car.

sébastien buemi, toro rosso, 2009-11, aged 20-23*

aka, the tale of three sebastians, none of them spelt the same.

buemi was brought into toro rosso in 2009 from the feeder series and his first season with them went, honestly remarkably well. he scored points on multiple occasions, outscored teammate, and rival seb, bourdais and achieved three top ten qualifying positions in a row. he was named best rookie of the season.

he continued to produce results at this level in the '10 season, in spite of one truly spectacular incident in free practice of the chinese grand prix when his suspension failed and jettisoned his two front wheels while he was travelling at over 300kph. one of the wheels went over the safety fence and almost hit a camera man. fortunately no one was hurt. he even outscored teammate alguersuari, with eight points to alguersuari's five.

in 2011, he again produced good results, scoring a total of fifteen points, almost double the previous year. however, despite this and in a surprise move, both he and alguersuari were dropped in december 2011, despite having verbal confirmation from toro rosso that their seats were safe. according to alguersuari, the reason given was that they "weren't winners". this move came so late in the season that neither alguersuari or buemi were able to negotiate for seats at other teams, which may well have been available to them, as they were already filled.

buemi himself has remained fairly quiet about his time as part of the red bull family.

he was retained as a red bull test driver in 2012 and continued to be included on their list of test drivers as recently as 2022.

since leaving f1, buemi has won the world endurance racing champioship on four occasions and the 24 hours of le mans on three. he is one of the most successful drivers in formula e's history, being crowned world champion in 2016, and still races within that series. he is one of the most decorated drivers currently racing outside of f1.

(a personal aside here, buemi's success has as much meaning to me personally as pierre gasly's win after his demotion. imagine being told that you are not a winner, only to go on and win five world championships).

jaime alguersuari, toro rosso (2009-11), aged 19-21

(serious content warning, this one contains descriptions of night terrors and discusses seeking psychological help)

at the time of his arrival, jaime alguersuari was the youngest person ever to race in f1 and only the seventh teenager. he was also the first f1 driver to be born in the 1990s. he is the son of jaime alguersuari sr., a minor motorcycle racer.

alguersuari had little success in the second half of the '09 season, suffering from mechanical failures and retiring in five of the last eight races.

despite this, he secured the drive for '10. in malaysia, he scored his first ever points with franz tost praising his skills and saying he "drove an incredible race". he scored points on two further occasions, completing the series with five and finishing just behind teammate buemi in the standings.

in the '11 season, alguersuari started out badly in the races, in either finishing outside of the points or retiring, despite qualifying impressively.

by the canadian grand prix there were rumours that he would be replaced by daniel ricciardo, who had completed a race for backmarker team hrt. in canada however, he finished eighth for his best ever result.

alguersuari significantly improved, scoring points in seven of the last thirteen races, bringing home a total points haul of twenty six, more than five times his score from the previous year and outscoring teammate buemi.

despite having impressed across the paddock in general and being tipped as a great racer of the future, alguersuari was dropped alongside his teammate, as covered above. alguersuari has repeatedly insisted that he had multiple verbal confirmations that his seat was safe from toro rosso.

since being dropped, alguersuari has been, and continues to be, vocal about the mistreatment of himself and other drivers by the red bull program. here are a few excerpts:

"none of the drivers that are racing for red bull would have had that chance without them. that is crystal clear. but what is also crystal clear is the way they sacked me and my team was not the way they should have done it [...] it was a very quick phone call lasting just one minute. it was a very tough thing, and i didn’t understand why. i still don’t understand why even today [...] they played their cards, and i wasn’t smart enough to move out at the right time. i did have an opportunity to move in abu dhabi in 2011 – that was the contract I needed to sign – and that was the only opportunity I had to sign that contract. i didn’t sign it because i wanted to be faithful to the people who had helped me since i was 15.” - 2023

"i tell you something – when i sleep, i still have very strange dreams of that time, especially about the impotence and the frustration of never making it, of seeing mr. [helmut] marko always angry, telling us off. as if we were children. [...] i have not been able to erase this.i have done therapy, when i retired several psychologists helped me… now, even so, strange things come to my head. and sometimes wake up, like, crying, having dreamt of having done a great lap only to see the face of mr. marko, angry [...] this has created a trauma – and I am convinced that buemi and many others are also going through it." - 2022

alguersuari was prielli test driver 2012-13. he was later one of the founding drivers of formula e in 2014, alongside former teammate buemi and ex-toro rosso drivers liuzzi and vergne. after only a season, he was forced to suspend racing activities after suffering from unexplained fainting spells, which were later resolved. in 2015 he retired from motor racing entirely, at the age of 25, having "fallen out of love" with it. he is now a professional dj and staged a return to competitive karting in 2021. he continues to be a vocal supporter of buemi and spanish compatriot carlos sainz jr.

jean-éric "jev" vergne, toro rosso (2012-14), aged 21-24*

(serious content warning, this one gets very upsetting and talks about eating disorders, extreme dieting, weight restrictions and hospitalisation).

vergne took part in the goodwood festival of speed, driving an f1 car, in 2010. after this, it was announced that he would test for toro rosso in the young drivers test of the same year. he went on to drive in selected free practies in 2011.

he was confirmed to race for toro rosso ahead of the '12 season, alongside teammate daniel ricciardo. in this season, he scored points on only four occasions and after the european grand prix was ruled by the fia to have caused an avoidable collision with heikki kovalainen, resulting in a ten place, double grid drop penalty and a fine of €25,000. he crashed out on one other occasion and had two retirements due to suspension failure. despite a poor showing in that season, he outscored teammate ricciardo with sitxteen points to ricciardo's ten.

in his second season, despite finishing higher in the standings, vergne scored fewer points on fewer occasions. of his five retirements, three were caused by mechanical failure and one was caused by tyre failure (a problem which plagued the entire grid that season and led to questions about pirelli's suitability as manufacturer). he was outscored by teammate ricciardo who scored twenty points to vergne's thirteen and was subsequently promoted to red bull ahead of vergne for the '14 season.

the '14 season proved to be particularly unlucky for vergne, with five dnfs total, all of which came over the course of eight races. despite this he scored points on seven occasions, giving him his best driver's championship finish with twenty two points, giving him 13th place, more than doubling team mate kvyat's score of eight. all but one of his retirements were from mechanical failure, with the final dnf being caused by collision with pastor maldonado (this was no fault of vergne's and collisions with maldonado were a problem that plagued the entire grid this season).

at the end of the '14 season, vergne was initially to be dropped in favour of max verstappen. sebastian vettel's not-unexpected move to ferrari opened up a space at red bull alongside ricciardo, to which kvyat was promoted, despite vergne reporting that the seat had been promised to him in the event of vettel's departure. this would have left a space for vergne at toro rosso, however, he was ultimately dropped from toro rosso and the seat went to carlos sainz jr. vegrne failed to secure an f1 drive for the '15 season and has not raced in f1 since.

it was reported that in the '14 season, between the australian and malaysian gps, vergne had been hospitalised after starving himself to meet new weight regulations (valtteri bottas, then at williams, has also spoken about the eating/exercise disorder he developed around the same time due to the same regulations). this was particularly a problem for the taller and/or more stockily built drivers - vergne is 6ft, tall for an f1 driver. he weighed 69kg to kvyat's 61kg. mclaren even rejected the idea of signing nico hulkenberg because of his weight. adrian sutil, another tall driver, accused other, smaller drivers of repeatedly blocking rule changes aimed at improving conditions for taller/heavier drives.

jean todt, then president of the fia, dismissed the concerns of the drivers at the time and said, specifically about vergne: "i think normally you can do a good diet and not to have to go to hospital because you have been losing so many kilos. i don't think you go to hospital because you are on a diet."

vergne has said about his time with the red bull family: "i will not attack them, because without them I would not be where I am at the moment, but it is a really difficult story for me. when I started in formula 3, [helmut marko] called me and said: ricciardo has shown you how to do it. if you don’t win the championship, you can leave. [vergne says about a second phone call] i was starting on pole and eventually i won that race, but Marko thought it was unacceptable that i had not also taken the fastest lap. that’s just how he is.” - 2019

"since it was announced mid-year that I would be out of toro rosso it would have looked very bad if, when vettel decided to leave for Ferrari, that he had called me back to go to red bull. during this frank conversation with helmut, i said what if vettel leaves. he told me vettel would not leave. And I said but what if. and he said you’d be the next one to go to red bull. but so yeah… we found out on the saturday or the friday that vettel was going to ferrari and red bull wanted to respond straight away and they announced kyvat in the morning without talking to anyone. it was a tough moment and then of course franz tost wanted to keep him, he wanted an experienced driver together with max but once again red bull could not say we are going to keep vergne and there was another driver coming with carlos sainz so they put him in the car. i wish helmut would have done it as it did with many other drivers and wait until the last race of the season to tell them because if he had waited, with the grands prix i had done before Japan [and vettel’s announcement], i was in a much stronger position to go to red bull racing than kvyat.” - 2021

"i did not smile for three years." - 2019

vergne moved to the newly formed formula e, where he has raced ever since. he is the only driver to have won two formula e world championship titles, which he did back to back in 2018 and 2019. he currently races for ds penske alongside fellow champion stoffel vandoorne.

daniil kvyat, toro rosso (2014), red bull (2015-16), toro rosso/alphatauri (2017, 2019-20), aged 19-25

(serious content warning, this one's really fucking heavy and involves depressive episodes and possible suicidal behaviour. also, sorry if you're a sebastian vettel fan, he's partly to blame here).

kvyat first came to the attention of the red bull junior driver program in 2009, after winning the karting winter cup in the kf3 category. he remained with red bull throught his time in the motorsports feeder series and was given a drive at toro rosso for the '14 season, alongside returning driver vergne.

he had an average rookie season, scoring points on five occasions, with a best finish of ninth, which was significantly outscored (as expected) by his more experienced teammate. all five of his retirements were caused by mechanical failure. depsite this, he was advanced to red bull ahead of vergne, who ultimately failed to secure a drive in f1.

kvyat's '15 season at red bull was impressive for a driver with limited experience. he scored points on all but five occasions and achieved a second-place podium finish, become the second-youngest driver ever to achieve this (at the time). he failed to start on one occasion and dnfed on another due to engine failure. his other dnf, however, came after crashing into teammate ricciardo, whose race was significantly impeded as a result.

despite ricciardo's race win, kvyat outscored his teammate in the '15 season by three points.

in the '16 season, kvyat was demoted to toro rosso after just four races, one of which he failed to start. despite scoring points in bahrain and finishing in third-place in china, red bull opted to swap kvyat and toro rosso driver max verstappen after kvyat's home race of the russian grand prix, in which he finished fifteenth. he struck the ferrari of sebastian vettel at the end of the first lap, retiring vettel's car and severely impeding his own race.

after the chinese gp, vettel slammed kvyat's "suicidal" driving, following his collision with teammate kimi raikkonen on turn one while taking avoiding action around kvyat, despite the stewards taking no action and many suggesting that vettel was in fact to blame. vettel finished second and was in the cool down room ahead of the podium with kvyat when he laid into him on live television. he subsequently dubbed kvyat "the torpedo".

after the russian gp, many news outlets and social media accounts noted that kvyat appeared morose and depressed, as well as reporting that he had removed all information from his social media bio to say "just a human". multiple social media posts from fans described kvyat as looking "suicidal" or stated that red bull/toro rosso must be on "suicide watch".

of the swap, christian horner said: "dany will be able to continue his development at toro rosso, in a team that he is familiar with, giving him the chance to regain his form and show his potential."

kvyat, who many continued to note looked extremely depressed for the rest of the season, score on only three occasions with toro rosso in the '16 season. despite this, and despite speculation that he would be dropped altogether, he was re-signed for the '17 season.

the '17 season went poorly for kvyat, who was plagued with mechanical failures as well as retirements due to driver error. he scored points on only three occasions and was replaced by pierre gasly from the malaysian gp onwards, although he returned for the us gp to replace carlos sainz jr, who had moved to renault, before being replaced again by brendon hartley, with helmut marko confirming that kvyat would not be returning to toro rosso for the '18 season.

despite being considered for williams in the '18 season, kvyat failed to secure a drive and spent the season as ferrari reserve driver.

kvyat rejoined toro rosso ahead of the '19 season, replacing pierre gasly who had been promoted to red bull. he raced alongside rookie teammate alex albon. he put in strong performances, finishing in the points on ten occasions and bringing home a third-place podium at the german gp. however, two of his three retirements were caused by collisions, in one of which kvyat was deemed by the fia to be at fault, adding to his growing, but largely unfair, reputation at "the torpedo" (in the other, ricciardo locked up and collided with kvyat, reversing into him whilst attempting to rejoin the race).

despite his good results, he was outscored in the early part of the season by temmate albon, and kvyat remained at toro rosso whilst albon was promoted mid-season to replace pierre gasly who was demoted.

kvyat continued at toro rosso, now rebranded as alphatauri in the '20 season. despite scoring well, scoring points in seven of the seventeen races (including one shock third place podium, toro rosso’s first since sebastian Vettel in 2008) and retiring only twice (once in a collision, which may have been caused by a tyre puncture rather than driver error, and one with suspension failure), he was outmatched by teammate gasly who claimed the team's first win since sebastian vettel at the italian grand prix. gasly finished the season with more than twice kvyat's total points (seventy-five to kvyat's thirty-two).

alphatauri chose not to renew kvyat's contract for the '21 season, electing instead to give the seat to the rookie yuki tsunoda. kvyat was reserve driver, alongside zhou guanyu, for alpine in the '21 season but has not raced in f1 since.

kvyat has been vocal about his poor treatment by the red bull family, saying: "from toro rosso to red bull, not easy of course. it’s a different f1 team, the top and the midfield has a different mentality. also, very difficult times for the team. everyone was very stressed. It was the opposite of now, now they have a dominant car, at the time, it was one of their worst cars. christan [horner] wasn’t happy. helmut [marko] wasn’t happy. so, they were difficult times at red bull. so to basically help them get through their shittiest times, and then they get rid of you.. but whatever, it was still a great chapter.” - 2023

he also said: "obviously the decision in a way was a bit of a shock also for myself. one week I was standing on the podium and then suddenly there were a few decisions made around. as i said, the bosses make them and I have nothing else but to accept them and do my best job possible now in the team i am with – and it is toro rosso. it should be ok – i think I have done everything correctly until now. and nothing will change from my side [...] i really felt betrayed then, it was a knife in the back, but that’s part of life. sometimes that happens, it’s normal. it is now in the past." - 2023

"the truth is after 2016, i didn’t really want to be there [at toro rosso]. zero motivation. i didn’t like working for them and every time i woke up, i was like, i have to go drive the car again with them. so it wasn’t very enjoyable at the time. in 2017, it was difficult because I had zero motivation and carlos was extremely motivated. and then if you go with this mentality against a motivated carlos, there’s no point. so for me i wish i had a chance with someone else in F1. red bull gave me a lot but since we had our issues, it was very difficult. and I didn’t have a lot of motivation to be there." - 2023

although kvyat entered the world endurance championship in 2022, he was forced to withdraw after the fia introduced limiting conditions to the ability of russian drivers to compete following the russian invasion of ukraine. kvyat called these conditions "unfair and descriminatory." he made three starts in nascar in 2022 and is currently testing in formula e, with a view to gaining a full drive in the '24 season.

carlos sainz jr., toro rosso (2015-17), aged 20-23**

sainz, son of successful rally cross racer carlos sainz sr., joined the red bull junior team in 2010 while racing in formula bmw. he then moved up the feeder series, taking part in the f1 young drivers' test in 2013. he joined the toro rosso team ahead of the '15 season.

in his debut race he qualified inside the top ten and ultimately finished ninth, scoring points. he went on to score points in seven of the ninteen races, only finishing an additional four. all eight of his retirements were caused by technical issues. despite his good results teammate verstappen more than doubled his score and was ultimately advanced to red bull over sainz early in the '16 season.

during his second season at toro rosso, he scored a total of forty six points, two and half times his score of the previous season and more than 2/3 of the teams total points.

in his third season for toro rosso, sainz continued to improve his scores, including a fourth place finish for toro rosso in singapore. despite this, sainz publicly commented that it was "unlikely" that he would stay with toro rosso during the austrian gp. this was refuted by christian horner who insisted that sainz would race for toro rosso in the '18 season.

despite scoring forty eight of toro rosso's fifty two points at that point in the season, sainz was "loaned" to renault from the us grand prix onwards, following the departure of jolyon palmer. he went on to end his relationship with red bull at the end of the season, leaving toro rosso for a full drive at renault.

though sainz has not spoken openly about his relationship with red bull, helmut marko said:

"we did not send sainz away and it is not for nothing that we were once very early to sign him. verstappen and sainz were very well matched, but we had no opportunity to offer him more [than a place at toro rosso]. he was not convinced of the future prospects at toro rosso. he felt he was not moving forward and he did not want to wait any longer. we first loaned him out and then we canceled the contract completely. after all, we did not want to stand in the way of his future." - 2021.

marko has also been critical of the involvement of carlos sainz sr. in his son's career, saying that his father is "one of those motorsports fathers who doesn't look at it objectively, which is understandable, and just always does what he thinks is best for his son." - 2021

sainz's time at renault was regarded as unsuccessful but later moves to mclaren and then ferrari proved fruitful. sainz still races in f1 with ferrari and is now a multiple race-winning driver.

brendon hartley, toro rosso (2017-18), aged 27-30*

hartley arrived in f1 as an fia wec champion, which he had won in 2015.

he had previously worked as a test driver for both red bull (2008-10) and mercedes (2012-13). he was dropped from his role as red bull test driver at the end of 2010, with red bull citing his failure to win a race during that season of formula renault 3.5 (for context, fellow test driver and teammate daniel ricciardo won the series).

he was initially brought in to race in the stead of pierre gasly at the 2017 us gp. gasly was absent in order to compete in the final round of the super formula championship. hartley's qualifying performance was marred by an engine grid drop penalty and he eventually finished the race in thirteenth.

he remained a toro rosso driver for the rest of the season, replacing kvyat. he failed to score any points, and retired in two of the three remaining races with mechanical failure, as well as taking a ten place grid drop penalty for changing power units.

in the '18 season, hartley scored points on only three occasions, finishing the season twenty five points behind teammate pierre gasly. he retired on five occasions, three caused by technical issues. overall his season was marred by a host of car related issues and associated grid drop penalties.

toro rosso announced hartley's replacement with alex albon at the end of the '18 season.

of his time with in the red bull family, hartley has said:

"of course, I would have liked to have stayed longer and kept progressing. i developed a lot during that season and I was doing a very good job at the end of the year. we didn’t have the car to finish in the points all the time. i learnt so much from that season. some things were tough. [...] sometimes some of the questions the media was asking or rumours. Sometimes you are under the microscope. i didn't always enjoy that. but again, it taught me a lot and it made me a lot stronger as a driver coming out the other side of that. i look back really only positively. absolutely no regrets. i gave it my best shot. there are only 20 cars on the grid." - 2023

hartley went on to drive a brief stint in formula e. he has continued in endurance racing and now holds three wec titles and three 24hrs of le mans titles, and like buemi is one of the most decorated drivers racing outside of f1.

pierre gasly, toro rosso (2017), red bull (2018-19), toro rosso/alphatauri (2019-2022), aged 21-26**

(serious content warning, this one covers the death of anthonie hubert).

gasly joined the red bull junior drivers team whilst competing in formula renault 3.5 in 2014. he was named red bull reserve driver in 2015 and made one appearance in formula e at the 2017 new york eprix, racing for renault. gasly made his debut in f1 for toro rosso in 2017 at the malaysian gp, replacing daniil kvyat, however he was forced to miss the us gp as he was racing concurrently in the super formula championship, the final round of which clashed. he failed to score any points in the five races he drove in in the '17 season, but did finish every race.

in the '18 season, he was given the drive at toro rosso alongside brendon hartley. he impressed, bringing home a total of twnty-nine points (compared to hartley's four) and scoring points on five occasions. three of his five dnfs were caused by mechanical failure, and of the two collisions, one was not gasly's fault as grosjean's tyres created a smoke screen eliminating both gasly and hulkenberg who were unable to see.

gasly was promoted to red bull for the '19 season, after daniel ricciardo left the team to go to renault. despite finishing in the points on nine occasions, with only two retirements (one due to mechanical failure, the other crashing into toro rosso driver alex albon), gasly was demoted to toro rosso ahead of the italian gp (the thirteenth round). this was after poor qualifying results, a couple of crashes and being lapped by teammate verstappen at the hungarian gp, who was much outperforming him (surprising no one). both christian horner and helmut marko confirmed that gasly would stay at red bull until the end of the season when rumours that gasly would be demoted began circumlating, but this proved to be false.

christian horner said of the demotion that the team needed to be able to "make an informed decision as to who will drive alongside max [verstappen] in 2020" and that "we desperately need [gasly] realising more of the potential of the car."

an ex-f1 senior systems engineer at red bull, although he professes to have heard this second hand, has also claimed on social media that Gasly got “quite vocal with adrian [newey] over the set-up of the car. it became a bit of a shouting match in the garage and then once that happened you know in front of Marko and that it was back to the sister team you go.” - Dan - EngineMode11 (on social media)

ahead of the belgian gp, his first race since being demoted, gasly's "best mate", anthoine hubert, was killed in the f2 support race. gasly was particularly affected by the death. christian horner sought out gasly ahead of the race and, self-reportedly said: "so all i could do was try to offer some support and say that anthoine was doing exactly what he wanted to do, and 'if he had the opportunity to be racing the formula 1 car that you're in tomorrow, he would have grabbed that opportunity with both hands."

despite the demotion, gasly achieved five more points finishes, including one second-place podium, toro rosso's best finish since sebastian vettel in 2008. he scored thirty two points for toro rosso (and ninty-five overall) compared to teammate kvyat's ten in the same period.

gasly was retained by the team for the '20 season and following the rebrand to alphatauri, again alongside kvyat. he scored points on ten occasions, with three dnfs (twice due to mechanical failure and once in a multi-car pile up). his early success, even before his win at the italian gp, led to widespread speculation that he would be promoted back to red bull after showing much improvement.

at the italian gp, gasly finished first, scoring toro rosso's second ever win. this was made possible through taking advantage of an early safety car and lewis hamilton receiving a penalty. even so, gasly demonstrated skill in overtaking lance stroll and holding off a charging carlos sainz jr. though franz tost praised gasly, he dismissed the possibility of him returning to red bull any time soon. he scored 75 points total that season, outscoring kvyat.

gasly dedicated his win to anthoine hubert, who he revealed had texted him ahead of the '20 belgium gp with the words "prove them wrong", which became a personal mantra.

despite his success, and the firing of alex albon, gasly was passed over for promotion to red bull. instead, the seat went to non-red bull family driver sergio perez.

he continued to impress in the '21 season, scoring a total of one hundred and ten championship points and securing a third place podium, as well as outscoring rookie teammate tsunoda (as expected), and was again passed-over for promotion in favour of retaining perez, who had received mixed reviews.

a visibly frustrated gasly did not score as well in the '22 seson, partly owing to an uncompetitive car. he scored only twenty three points and left alphatauri of his own volition for a drive at alpine in the '23 season. he was replaced by rookie nyck de vries.

gasly has been vocal about his treatement by red bull, even during his time at alphatauri (which many believe to be part of the reason he was repeatedly passed over for promotion).

of his time with the red bull family, gasly has said: " "from the moment I made my first mistake in a car, i felt like people there slowly began to turn on me. i'd had a crash in winter testing and from that moment on the season never really got going. then i had a tough first two races with red bull and the media just ate me up. anything i said in the press was twisted into an excuse for my form, and nobody really stuck up for me. the car wasn’t perfect and i was doing my best to try to improve and learn each week. but here’s what i’ll say about it – it was a difficult time for me at red bull because i didn’t feel like i was really supported and treated the same way as others there have been. And for me, that’s something i just can’t accept. i was working my ass off every day, trying to get results for the team, but i was not being given all the tools i needed to succeed. i would try to offer solutions but my voice wasn’t heard, or it would take weeks to see changes. for whatever reason, i was never going to be a fit in that seat — it was just never going to work. i’m not the type of person to start stuff in the media because i am truly grateful to red bull for the chance, as well as for everything they have done for me in my career. i really am. but i’m allowed to tell my truth.” - 2021

gasly now races at alpine alongside esteban ocon.

(personal aside, i find what christian horner said to pierre after anthoine hubert's death horrifying and morally bankrupt. if someone has lost their best friend in a racing accident on the same track they are due to race in the following day, there should be no form of pressure on them whatsoever to race. staff at red bull have repeatedly referred to, directly or indirectly, drivers wanting to cancel a race or to choose not to race personally following a major accident as some kind of cowardly. this is simply not true and it is my opinion that they should be publicly reprimanded by the fia and their peers for such behaviour).

alex albon, toro rosso (2019), red bull (2019-20), aged 22-24

albon became part of the red bull academy in 2012, but was dropped the same year. initially he was contracted to appear in formula e in the '19 season, racing with nissan, but his contract was cancelled to allow him to race for toro rosso in f1.

in his debut season, albon raced for toro rosso for only twelve races before being promoted to red bull, to replace the demoted gasly. his results had been fair to good, scoring points on five occasions, with a best finish of sixth. he retired only once in a collision that was no fault of his own.

after being promoted ahead of the belgian gp, albon finished in the points on all but one occasion, with a best finish of fourth, though he failed to gain a podium place (the goal for red bull at the time). his fourteenth place finish came after being struck and sent into spin by hamilton.

in the '20 season, albon finished in the points on all but four occasions, gaining two third-place podiums. both dnfs were caused by mechanical failure. he brought home a total of 105 points and finished seventh in the championship. despite these ostensibly good results, especially for someone who had only raced two seasons in f1, albon was dropped ahead of the '21 season after being significantly outperformed by teammate verstappen.

about his time at red bull, albon has said: "this isn’t to throw shade at anyone at red bull racing or max or anything, honestly. but the car is set up in a unique way that is built around the lead driver, and that’s max. and, look, i totally get why. i mean, when all is said and done, he might be the greatest driver of all time. but he has a very distinct style of driving, and he likes the car set up a certain way that’s hard for a lot of drivers to sync up with. of course, you can tinker and tweak your own car, but just the red bull in general is suited to max’s style. i like a lot of front end and nose. I’ve been teammates with george and charles and i've always had way more nose than them. and when i got into the red bull … i mean there was so much nose on the thing that if you blew on the wheel the car would turn. if you play call of duty, or a game like that, turn your sensitivity up to the highest it will go. that’s what it’s like to drive that car." - 2023

he has also said "it was the experience that was missing." - 2022

albon remained at red bull as reserve driver for the '21 season , as well as taking on a coaching role for rookie alphatauri driver yuki tsunoda, before securing a drive at williams for the '22 season. he continues to race there.

nyck de vries, alphatauri (2023), aged 28*

prior to racing in f1, nyck de vries raced in formula e for mercedes, where he was crowned champion in 2021. he also served as a test driver for mercedes f1, williams and aston martin.

he made his debut in f1 racing for williams in 2022 after being called up as reserve driver to race in place of alex albon, who was suffering from appendicitis.

he impressed during his debut, scoring points after finishing in ninth and being awarded driver of the day by fans.

despite much speculation that he would sign for williams in 2023, replacing nicholas latifi, de vries was successfully poached by alphatauri, replacing pierre gasly.

de vries failed to score any points in his races for alphatauri, with his highest finish being twelfth. he retired once due to driver error. after early speculation that he would lose his seat, he was dropped less than half way through the season after the end of the british grand prix, alphatauri forgoing the typical season's grace afforded to rookies. he was replaced by daniel ricciardo.

though de vries has yet to speak in any detail about his time with the red bull family, christian horner has said that the decision was made to replace him after daniel ricciardo performed well in eleven laps of testing. he said: "it all happened a little quicker than expected, bearing in mind we hadn’t completed the test [...] helmut spoke with nyck – you know, he was the one that obviously had recruited him – so he was the one that spoke with nyck about lap 11 of the test it was becoming a difficult situation for nyck, but there was a high expectation on him because, whilst inexperienced in formula 1, he’s obviously a very experienced driver. i think there was a general feeling that nyck wasn’t quite hitting the mark. and then the question was, what are the options if we were to switch things around? the situation was clear. It was a question of, okay, what’s the point in waiting? that would have meant obviously leaving him in the car until after the summer break."

de vries has since returned to formula e with mahindra racing.

so there you have it, the complete(ish) history of red bull crimes against their drivers, going all the way back to the beginning. i hope that you take this information and use it to make an informed decision about whether you personally want to support red bull and/or alphatauri in f1 (as teams, not the drivers individually). i personally cannot support any red bull family team in f1 because of this history of psychological/emotional abuse of their drivers and work place bullying. i am aware that this behaviour is not unique to red bull, but red bull display possibly the most extensive history of it, despite only coming into being in 2005. likewise they have made no effort to correct or acknowledge their wrongdoings.

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