#lotr incorrect quotes

[winwin17]

Incorrect Quote Poll

[achillyscomedown]

[bilbo-baggins-is-a-fcking-vibe]

I love the hair braiding trope, but there is some serious debate about whether it's dwarves who have the hair-braiding customs or elves, so I'm here to settle that once and for all.

Legolas, hoping they just seem friendly and doesn't know dwarves have the same hair customs: Hey Gimli, could I help with your hair?

Gimli, hoping he just seems friendly and doesn't know elves have the same hair customs: Uh, sure!

Aragorn, who knows that hair braiding is romantic for both elves and dwarves: ......... WHat

[fvck-the-patriarchy]

Y/n: Did you buy eggs like I asked?

Legolas: Even better!

Y/n: What the fuck did you-

Legolas: *holding up a chicken* Her name is Fluffy.

[nihilizzzm]

lotr/the hobbit incorrect quotes

part 3, i do not intend to stop

*three hunters at night*

Legolas: i love you Gimli

Gimli: yeah, i love you too

*silence*

Legolas: we both love you as well, Estel

Aragorn: thanks, i was starting to feel left out

— — — —

Bard: you know, i wish you would just admit that you made a mistake

Thranduil, stirring his coffee with passion: i PREFERE it with salt

— — — —

Pippin, excited: hey Boromir, we made you a friendship bracelet!

Merry, also excited: *showing boromir a very ugly, yet made with love bracelet*

Boromir: Yeah, you know… i’m not really jewellery person…

Pippin: oh… it’s okay…

Merry: it’s fine, you don’t have to wear it…

Boromir: No. I’m gonna wear it forever, back off.

— — — —

Legolas: whoops-

Aragorn: whoops? WHOOPS? We are far past the ‘whoops’ situation! ‘Whoops’ is but a distant speck in the review mirror! We are firmly in the ‘oh fuck’ territory and i expect you to ACT LIKE IT!!

[tekitothemagpie]

Legolas, looking at Gimli : I could take him

Aragorn : who, Gimli? Yeah I guess so

Legolas :

Aragorn : ...you mean in a fight right?

Legolas : making heart eyes

Aragorn : you mean in a fight right?!

[manmadedonut]

Bilbo: I... did a bad thing..

Thorin worried, not even thinking what it could be: What ever is it my love?

-

Bard: I did a bad thing.

Thranduil: Does it involve me?

Bard: No.

Thranduil: Then suffer in silence.

[lotrandthehobbitwritings]

Incorrect Quote #6

Legolas: we both look really good today

Thranduil: you know, if you said ‘’you look good today’’ I would’ve said it back

Legolas: I couldn’t take that risk

[7soulstars]

My Incorrect Universe #96

*before courting Thranduil*

Me: *trips on the ground*

Thranduil, scoffing and in a mocking tone : haha, how clumsy, could you be any more foolish?

*later when no one is around*

Thranduil : *stomping the ground* who do you think you are?? WHO IN EVER LOVING VALAR DO YOU-

--Few years later--

Thorin: I can’t believe you talked to Thranduil without getting so much as a glare! Most people can’t even look in his general direction without some kind of threat.

Me: I mean, it would be a little weird if he did. We are engaged after all......

Thorin, who thought he had a chance: “....YOU’RE WHAT?!”

Legolas,a rogue Gimli tucked under his arm pit: YOU'RE WHAT ?!

Haldir and Lindir, from behind the trees: YOU ARE WHAT ??!

Elrond: YOU'RE WHAT ?!

Me: why are YOU shocked?? You watched him propose to me??

Elrond, recalling himself screaming as he witnessed Thranduil get on one knee that day: I'm still recovering from the trauma-

*Legolas still trying to process what I just announced*:

[pinkbeastie]

elrond and durin: we’ll defeat sauron with the power of love and friendship! galadriel: and this gun i found

[chickentenderx]

Legolas: I scare people lots because I walk very softly and they don't hear me enter rooms so when they turn around I’m just kind of there and their fear fuels me

[winwin17]

Incorrect Quote Poll

[achillyscomedown]

[theglassofmiddleearth]

Imagine you enter the woods of Lothlorien with the Fellowship.

Gimli: Stay close, young hobbits! They say a great sorceress lives in these woods. An Elf-Witch.

Y/N: *Smirks* Of terrible power?

Gimli: Tis no joke m'lady. All who look upon her fall under her spell.

Galadriel: *Telepathically* Frodo..

Gimli: And are never seen again.

Y/N: Do not fear little ones. We will keep you from harm.

Samwise: We should be saying that to you Y/N.

Galadriel: You're coming to us, is as the footsteps of doom.

Galadriel: *Telepathically* You bring great evil here. Ring bearer.

Sam: Mr Frodo?

Gimli: Well, here's one dwarf she won't ensnare so easily. I have the eyes of a hawk and the ears of a fox.

The elves of the Lothlórien woods appears with bows.

Y/N: *Unsurprised* Is that right?

Haldir: The dwarf breathes so loud, we could have shot him in the dark.

Y/N: *Stifles a chuckle*

They walk to Lórien

Haldir: *In elvish* Well met, Legolas son of Thranduil.

Legolas: Our Fellowship stands in your debt. Haldir of Lórien.

Y/N: Yep, I love it when he speaks elvish. *She smiles down at the hobbits.*

Haldir: Ah, Aragorn of the Dúnedain. You are known to us.

Aragorn: Haldir..

Haldir: Pethryn.

Y/N: *Nods silently.*

Gimli: So much for the legendary courtesy of the Elves. Speak words we can all understand.

Y/N: *Grins* They are greeting eachother. Be patient my friend.

Haldir: *In the common tongue* We have not had dealings with the dwarves since the Dark Days.

Gimli: And you know what this Dwarf says to that? Ishkhaqwi ai duru- (I spit upon your gra-)

Y/N: *Stops Gimli with her hand and gentle taps his shoulder.* Now now Gimli.

Aragorn: That was not so courteous.

Haldir: *Turns to look at Frodo.* You bring great evil with you. You can go no further.

Aragorn: *In elvish* We need your protection, the road is fell. Please we need your support.

Legolas: Y/N, you understand Sindarin?

Y/N: What, me solving the riddle wasn't enough for you? *She grins*

Aragorn: *In Elvish* I wish we may come with you. The road is very dangerous Haldir.

Boromir: Gandalf's death was not in vain. Nor would he have you give up hope. You carry a heavy burden Frodo. Don't carry the weight of the dead.

Haldir: You will follow me.

They travel to Caras Galadhon.

Haldir: Caras Galadhon.

Y/N: The heart of Elvendom on earth.

Haldir: Realm of the Lord Celeborn and of Galadriel, Lady of Light.

Y/N: *Smirks to Aragorn.* I get to see the pretty elves again.

Aragorn: *Rolls his eyes*

Legolas: *Mutters* Am I not a pretty elf?

Y/N: *Laughs* You are the prettiest of all elves Miluir ("Lovely one" in Sindarin)

Legolas: *Gapes in surprise.*

Y/N: *Chuckles and walks away.*

Legolas: Wait! What did you just call me? Say it again!

[fvck-the-patriarchy]

Kili: Look, I know you think my judgement's clouded because I like Y/n a little bit.

Thorin, holding Kili's notepad: You doodled your wedding invitation.

Kili: No, that's our joint tombstone.

Thorin: My mistake.

[radjerda]

So, I did some Rivendell-based incorrect quotes doodles a while back. Presenting:

Thranduil is in town for a visit and Glorfindel happens to be showing him around.

Erestor will find a way to make an overworked Elrond listen to his advice.

A semi-newly returned Glorfindel gets ready for his day.