#makse

[kneipe]

lyon 2023

[ratbaby15]

Got to the episode where we see maul again. Deeply unsettled by spider-maul, was yet again not prepared for it, dont think I ever will be. aside from the fuckery I'm enduring I do have a question. Now, I can understand the spider legs, it's a little weird but the functionality is there, what I don't understand is the need for the spider ass? Like, this is mechanical, no? This isn't a real spider he's attached himself to, so what the fuck does he need the spider ass for? I hate the spider ass and I want it gone right now!!

Anywho, here's another shitty meme from yours truly:

[baby5fanclub]

so how come i always liked acesan even after i realized they barely interacted when i read the manga, and now i’m watching alabasta and ace is just?? there???

honestly obsessed with the ace filler + simple ace presence and if he’s gonna have a yaoi moment with sanji in the process you know what so be it.

[jeekoftheweek]

undefined

[solargeist]

Your blog makes me insane btw.

-Phantom

[cattistic]

High vs Medium vs Low Masking

I've been hearing mostly high and low to talk about how much one masks. And i wanted to add my thoughts and masking experiences to the discussion.

Since you've all read my other post about only my thoughts on masking and the experience and what i do to mask myself and my autism, i'd just like to say that i'm a very low masker. I only know that i mask only one of my symptoms actively and that's my social struggles.

Of course, i also mask other traits and/or symptoms of my autism too without my knowing. When i do talk or go out of my way to try to talk to people, i don't look them in the eyes because it's literally just so painful for me to endure. And i've decided that i must self isolate to avoid eye contact since again, i find it painful.

With that all in mind, i like to think i'm a low to medium masker. I mostly mask by self isolation so that people only think of me as an introvert, not as an autistic person.

I hope that makes sense. I never really understood masking and what masking looked like, especially in regards to me and how i mask if i even mask in the first place.

[yellowloid]

btw when alex wrote do me a favour he was being possessed by the spirit of a closeted wlw who still didn't know she was wlw and was also involved in a high school codependent homoerotic female friendship. 2841 dead 16426 injured

[mackmp3]

Women want me for my high budget ultra professional capo

that is. actually really clever wow, does it work well? like thats actually so smart damn. also i think we have similar guitars hehe mine kinda looks like that too :]

[girl4music]

Geez the amount of videos I have in my collection that focus specifically on Xena’s suicidal ideation and her inability to forgive herself and let anyone love her…

I’m just a glutton for punishment and pain aren’t I?

But besides from Gabrielle’s individual storyline, I genuinely think it’s the most compelling story. It’s incredibly sad but it’s also extremely fascinating at the same time so I kind of just endure the hurt for the education because it’s such an interesting part of Xena’s individual storyline and you learn so much about her character through her self-sacrificial nature - of which she herself said in her past “I’m not into that.” Which is an absolute crock of lies. Clearly.

[robotgraffiti]

todd brotzman anyone

[chronically-enthusiastic]

Sooo.... Below the read break is kinda my autism journey? Well masking journey probably. I did this both for myself, and for any other people out there who are looking for stories of other people and their experiences. And also a bit for the picrewcule bc ive posted some stuff about struggling with friendships recently and yeah..... :)

I was always the weird one in primary school... I was bullied in my first school, maybe a combination of autism and faith? But it led me to have to move schools... In my second primary school, people didnt bully me as overtly, but they would run away from me if I went near them and they called me unpleasant things. I was asked why I was weird quite a few times and my answer was that i had learnt how to interact in a normal way at my previous school, and now i am here and I dont know again... Which looking back was very self aware if me, but also very autistic of me....

I did find friends at that school, but they were so toxic and oftentimes mean that it would probably have been better for me to not have made friends at all....

Every time i went back after a half term, i would cry and plead with myself to just try to be normal. Theyll like me if im normal, they wont run away from me in the playground saying ive got the cheese touch. But each time I failed to make myself normal.

UNTIL!! i started high school. The mask fell into place in year 7. And it worked! No one was mean to me, infact I even found a few nice friends! But every time the mask dropped slightly accidentally i would feel so so bad inside, like i had done the worst thing ever and i had messed up forever.

Then year 8 came along. And masking all the time took its toll. I was crying every day needing to go to the library. I forgot what it was like to feel happy. I was so so tired and so so sad. I forgot who I was. Family friends were asking my parents if I was okay because i seemed so different and sad. And I would say im fine, because my life was fine. I had family who loved me, a school that I enjoyed, and friends who cared for me. I had no reason to be depressed.

Aannd then lock down happend. And that possibly maybe saved my life. I wasnt at that point yet, but I think I was on that trajectory. I found myself again in lockdown! Thats the short of it! Yay!

Then school started up again and i masked again, and i started going downhill again. Fast forward to yr11 when I was missing so many lessons because of anxiety/overstimulatiin.... And people noticed this time and I got therapy! Halfway through therapy me and my therapist seperately came to the conclusion that I was probably autistic. And everything made sense.

I started to lower the mask and almost immediately lots of my anxiety ceased. I started to learn who I was again, and I felt so much happier. And now? Im in a new school without anyone I know and ive dropped the mask almost entirely.

First weeks are always hard for me. I was expecting to need to miss almost every lesson this week and to be crying constantly. Ive gone to every lesson and this week has been about as bad as a normal week at my old school. I have support now.

Masking really took its toll and I am so glad Im in a position that I dont need to anymore. I dont want to end up back where i was in year 8, or yr 11. But it does mean its harder to find friends.... But as you have said, its better to have friends who know the real me and who like the real me than friends who like a mask.

[lieutenantbiscute]

Me: -enjoying my TT scroll for once and saving a Raph angst edit. Decides to check comments-

‘Raphmona is a pro ship because—‘

*closes TT*

I really need to delete this app at this point DEAR LORD—

[obnoxiousarcade]

I need to read again

[blueprintjoker]

fagfat -> phocaphan

RRRRRAAAAHHHHH A! A!

[lottablu]

just listened to unreal unearth for the firet time..... i have no words

[cyancherub]

those type of covers look like they’ve been designed on Canva

CANVA DKLSFOSOIF