#man. don’t you love needing surgery right at the start of your break so now you couldn’t do anything besides lying down terribly in pain an

[archduke-enver-gortash]

[gor3sigil]

Before starting T, when I socially transitionned, I was surrounded by radical feminists who saw masculinity as gross and inherently evil, something to avoid, something to make fun of, something to destroy. The other transmascs in my friend group, sometimes, told me that they didn’t knew if they really were non-binary or if they just were scared shitless of saying “I am a man”. Because they saw this as a betrayal to their younger self who had been SAd and abused.

I saw many of my masc friends and trans men around me hate themselves, not outing themselves as men because it would imply so so much, it was like opening the Pandora Box. Even when we were just together, talking about our masculinity was always coated with bits like “I know we’re the privileged ones but…”, “I don’t want to sound like I have it bad but…”, “Women obviously have it worse, but last time…” and we were talking about terrible traumas we experienced while taking all the precautions in the world in the case the walls were a crowd of people in disguise waiting to get us if we didn’t downplay the violence we faced, or like crying and being upset and being traumatized and afraid and scared and to say it out loud would make us throw up the needles we were forced to swallow every second of every day living in our skin.

Most of us weren’t on T yet, some of us were catcalled every day and harassed in the streets or in abusive relationships nobody seemed to care to help them get out of because they were “strong enough” to do it by themselves.

I was using the gender swap face app and cried for ours when I saw my father looking back at me through the screen. The idea of transforming, of shedding into a body that would deprive me of love, tenderness, and safety, was absolutely terrifying. I knew I couldn’t stay in this body any longer because it wasn’t mine, but I also knew that if I was going to look like my dad, my brother, my abusers, it would be so much worse.

5 years later and I’m almost 2 years on T, and almost 2 months post top surgery.

I ditched my previous group of friends. I was bullied out of my local trans community. But let me tell you how free I am.

I was scared that T would break my singing voice: it made it sound more alive than ever.

I was scared that T would make me less attractive: it made me find myself hot for the first time in my life.

I was scared that T would make me gain weight: it did. But the weight I put on is not the weight I used to put on by binging and eating my body until I forgot that it even existed. It’s the weight of my body belonging to me, little by little. The wolf hunger for life.

I won’t tell you the same story I see everywhere, the one that goes “I started going to the gym 8 times a week, I put on some muscles, I started a diet and now I look like an action film actor”, in fact if you took pictures of me from 5 years ago vs now I’d just have more acne, I’d have longer hair and still look like I don’t know what to do with myself when I take selfies.

But the sparkle in my eyes, my smile, tell the whole story way better than this long ass stream of words could ever.

I want to say some things that I wish someone told me before starting medically transitionning.

It’s okay to take your time. It’s your body, it’s your journey, if you don’t feel comfortable taking full doses and want to go slow, the only voice you need to listen to is your own. Do what feels right.

If you feel overwhelmed, it’s okay to take a break, it’s okay to ask for support.

Trans people are holy. Everyone is. You didn’t lose your angel wings when you came out because you want to be masculine. You are not excluded from the joy of existence, from being proud of yourself, from being sad, from being scared, from being angry. The emotions and feelings you allowed yourself to feel while processing what you experienced when you grew up as a girl and was seen as a woman are still as valid as before. Nobody can take that from you. If someone tries to, don’t let them.

It’s perfectly normal to grieve some things you were and had before you started to transition, like your high soprano voice or even your chest. Hatching is painful. You can find comfort in things that don’t feel right, so making the decision to change can be incredibly scary and weird and you deserve to be heard and supported through this. Wanting top surgery doesn’t make the surgery less intense, less terrifying, less painful to recover from. When it becomes too much you have the right to take a break and take some deep breaths before going on.

You don’t have to have a radical, 180° change for your transition to be acceptable or valid or worthy of praise. Look at how far you’ve come already. It doesn’t have to show, you’re not made to be a spectacle, you’re human and it is your journey.

Oh, and last thing, you know when some people say “Oh this trans person has to grow out of the cringy phase where you think that you can write essays about being trans or transitionning or just their experience because it’s weird” ? If you ever hear this or see this online, remember all the people whose writing you read and, even if they were not professional writers, helped you more than any theorists did ? If you want to write, do it. It won’t be a waste. It can help people. Or it won’t, and even then, if it helped you, that’s enough.

Love every of my trans siblings, take care of yourselves. You deserve the world.

[chaos-in-deepspace]

LADS: Glowdicks | 18+ Crack Fic

This started off as a joke with @anxiousgoddest and then I began talking to @zayne-li and decided I had to do it. I had to write it. If I didn't write these men's dicks breaking due to riding them too hard, who was gonna do it? That's what I thought. Nobody. So here we are.

❧ Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+. ❧ Warnings: Riding, Unsafe Sex, Injuries, Surgeries, Dick Fractures ❧ Pairings: Xavier x Reader, Zayne x Reader, Rafayel x Reader, Sylus x Reader

Blog Information | Masterlist

Xavier

The fiasco all started because you decided you wanted to be riding Xavier instead of letting him bend you over this time.

You were going to town on his dick to the point where you couldn’t even feel your legs anymore and he had already cum once and you weren’t aboutta stop for anything.

Literally nothing could pry you away from his dick right now. 

At least you thought, but you decided to try a new move where you clamped down hard on his dick like a vice. He was moaning underneath you from how tight you had managed to get.

Then you freaking slipped when he thrusted up into you, your hips moving along with it.

The moment you heard the crack noise it was like everything else in the room stilled.

In Xavier’s defense, the only noise that left him was a gasp instead of a scream like one would expect.

You just made eye contact with him and his eyes were wide as all hell. You were both scared of the moment you slid off his dick and saw the results of what you just did.

You slowly got up and his dick slid out of you with a wet noise and you looked down and…well it certainly wasn’t supposed to look like that.

You both had a moment of silence for his broken dick, just staring at it. Honestly you were expecting it to be glowing with how it sounded and his evol. Almost disappointing it wasn’t.

Then he just sighs and looks up at you.

“I mean…I guess these things happen,”

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS SHIT HAPPENS XAVIER?! HOW OFTEN DOES YOUR DICK BREAK?! WHO ELSE IS RIDING YOUR DICK?!

You just kept staring at it and back at him. How wasn’t he screaming in pain right now? You think you’d be a sobbing mess at this point.

“Sorry, but I don’t think I’ll be able to go for any more rounds tonight. Did you want to sit on my face instead?”

“Xavier, you need medical attention.”

“I’ll just sleep it off, it’ll be fine,”

You’re already getting up to get ice packs and googling what to do if your dick breaks. All your research is saying he needs to go to the hospital and seek medical attention and possible surgery is needed in most cases.

You walked back in the room with the ice pack and phone in hand and you drop them both when you see Xavier snapping it back into place.

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING, YOU CAN’T JUST DO THAT?!”

Xavier just looks at you like a puppy who’s being scolded and frowned.

“It’s fine, it’ll heal probably in a day or two, don’t worry about it. You know I heal fast.

You want to cry because who let this man into society? Who allowed him to walk around common people? He just snapped his dick back into place. There’s no way that would work.

Well it did, because in two days he was grabbing you as you tried leaving the bed in the morning, telling you that he was feeling better and wanted to make up for lost time.

You just didn’t want to ride him for a couple weeks after that, and you decided to stop doing kegel exercise after that. It wasn’t worth it.

Zayne

You had been riding him on the damn rocking chair again. After the first time you decided you really liked it since it did some of the work for you. His hands were on your hips and he was just letting you control the pace.

You had squeezed down hard on his cock, pushing the chair back in the same motion. Then the chair kept going back. And then it was falling back. Then suddenly you were on the ground.

Don’t worry his dick was still inside of you though, but he was groaning in pain, letting out a hiss. He was gasping for breath for a moment. 

You had thought you heard a crack during your fall, but thought it had been the couch breaking or part of the fall. Oh no. Sadly that was just wishful thinking.

"Hold on, wait--oh fuck get off, right now,"

Oh that was a very pained voice as you got off his dick and looked down. Your eyes widened as you realized his dick didn’t normally look like that. You had a moment of silence for his now broken dick as he managed to still lift you up and placed you on the normal couch.

He went to the restroom and of course you followed him like a little duckling as he began inspecting the damage. You heard a long sigh coming from him and he turned to you since he could see you in the mirror.

“We need to go to the hospital,”

“It is like…broken?”

“It’s been fractured. I’ll need to run some scans to see how severe the damage is. I need you to drive me.”

You both hopped into the car and got to the hospital. Yvonne had greeted you two and mentioned Zayne not being scheduled today. He was just looking down and beelining to his office. You gave her an apologetic look since the woman was clearly confused.

He made you stay in his office as he went about doing tests on himself and looking over all the damage.

When he came back to the hospital he looked absolutely horrified as he told you it would require surgery to fix. He seemed to be thinking long and hard about it and then just let out another sigh.

“I’ll take some pain medication and just do it myself,”

UM I’M SORRY SIR, WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST SAY? YOU’RE GONNA PERFORM SURGERY ON YOUR OWN DICK?!

You’re already texting Greyson about the situation and about how your boyfriend is so mortified that his dick was broken during sex that he was going to deadass perform surgery on himself.

Greyson sent a few laughing emojis as well as the purple eggplant one, asking if he looked like this right now. He did. Your poor boyfriend looked like the eggplant emoji right now.

Greyson came into the office shortly after and told Zayne he’d get the surgery handled and Zayne looked at you in absolute betrayal, but like hell you were about to let this man perform surgery on your favorite riding implement.

“It was either I contacted Greyson, or Dr. Noah. Your choice,”

He shut up after that and after his surgery you could hear the whisperings about how you broke Dr. Li’s dick.

Yvonne also heard and came over to ask you about what happened and you didn’t skimp out on any of the details.

When you got to the room he was staying at to recover he was just glaring at you like a mad cat, clearly betrayed. He’d get over it. At least his dick would still be working after this.

Also you had a few doctors asking you if you needed a wheelchair for some odd reason. You couldn’t figure it out.

After the incident he wasn’t letting you ride him on the couch. Claiming it was ‘Too dangerous’.

Rafayel

Rafayel decided he wanted to fuck you against a wall, which wasn’t super uncommon. When he got in the mood he would take you just about anywhere he could. The wall, the table, over the podium in an empty lecture hall before he was supposed to give a speech about art.

If he could fuck you on it, then he would. Whenever he got riled up all normal thoughts were gone and he was all over again.

So right now he had you pinned up against the front door of the art studio because you decided to tease him all night. He had to stop himself from fucking you in the ride back home. He almost pulled over by the ocean and took you over one of the rocks.

Everything was going fine, you were so damn wet just from the thought of him fucking you that his dick was able to slide in easy.

You squeezed down on his cock and tried moving your hips, but apparently he was changing angles at the same time.  There was that crack that nobody wanted to hear mid fuck.

You both went down on that, Rafayel in pain and you because he dropped your ass onto the floor.

His hand was between his legs as he hissed and when he looked at his dick he literally gasped and looked up at you.

“Call me an ambulance,”

What do you MEAN?! LET US HAVE A LOOK WHAT HAPPENED BRO?!

You looked down and your only thought was the image of the eggplant emoji. Anyways, you called an ambulance for him because you were both freaking out at this point. His dick was broken. You broke his dick.

The ride to the hospital was filled with your horrified faces and the EMTs looking at the scene completely amused. Thankfully you had the decency to put your damn pants back on and tried covering Rafayel’s decency.

When you got to the hospital they were doing scans and stuff and then you were told he’d need surgery. Like right away.

You had called Thomas to let him know Rafayel would be needing a few days off. When he asked you and you had to tell him you literally counted the seconds he was sighing. It was ten. He was sighing for ten seconds straight. He just told you to let him know how long the recovery would be once you found out.

When he got out of surgery you were already walking into the room, only to see him surrounded by a few nurses.

Man was high as a kite and bragging.

“Okay but has your partner ever broken your dick before because of how good it was? No? I didn’t think so.”

Really you should’ve taken that as a sign to leave, but you had stayed and when he saw you he was so loopy and stretching his arms out wanting you to hold him.

You recorded him. When he was sober and home and you showed him the recordings of him wanting to cuddle, and bragging about how good you were. He was trying to lunge at you to delete it. You threatened to break his dick again and he shut up.

Sylus

He was fucking you hard into the mattress and you couldn’t feel your legs anymore. Like absolutely numb with how they were tossed over his shoulders at the moment.

You couldn’t even speak as you were so fucked out from this entire thing, and you needed a damn breather. You don’t even know how many times you had cum at this point.

You had also forgotten the safeword and signal, not that you could speak at the moment. Still the signal would’ve been nice to remember in your fucked out brain.

He pressed deeper in you and you didn’t know how to verbalize you needed a moment or respite. Sylus had seen the look in your eyes though like you were pleading with him.

He was about to pull out, but you decided in that exact moment that you would squeeze down on him painfully to show you needed a second.

Well with both movements and how he was angled there was a nice snap that echoed in the room.

You had heard the gasp and pained groan coming from him. It was pretty fucking loud and he let out a hiss.

You were still out of it as you felt him pull out of you completely. The only thing you were focused on was getting your breathing back to a normal rate.

Sylus'lips were on you trying to get you to come back to him and finally you were getting coherent enough to finally speak.

“What was that snapping noise?”

“That was my cock, sweetheart,”

That was a confusing thing to say and your eyes drifted down between his legs, but he was cupping your chin and forcing you to look up at him.

“I didn’t say you could look at it, sweetie,”

That damn purr sent a shiver down your spine and you let out a whine. He just chuckled at your response though because high key it was amusing that you were upset that you couldn’t see his broken dick.

“Next time you want me to stop, you should let me know before snapping my cock,”

Okay listen, first off, if you could you would’ve. It’s not your fault that the man’s dick game is a 10/10 and you couldn’t think straight at the moment.

“Do we need to go to the hospital?”

“Did I need a hospital trip when you shot me?”

Okay, touché. Still you felt bad. You had just snapped his dick and he was acting so casually about it right now. Doesn’t that hurt?

Instead of acknowledging the pain he just went to work cleaning you up instead and then curling you up to his chest to go to bed.

By the morning his dick was apparently back to normal though as he was pressing it against your ass while he was spooning you.

“Don’t break it this time, alright?”

You’re not gonna lie, the moment he said that you were damn tempted to do it again out of sheer spite.

I'd like to say I'm still working on the Mermaid Rafayel smut, however took a short mini break in order to write this to help clear my mind. I'm 8k into the other fic and we haven't even gotten to the smut so ya...it'll be another long one. Hope you enjoyed reading about braking their dicks tho.

[mykoreanlove]

If you’re an over-thinker, you’re an under-feeler

You had been isolated for the last couple of hours - ever since you came back from your doctor‘s appointment you were absentminded, too preoccupied with researching your newfound condition.

Your boyfriend checked in on you every other hour but didn’t dare to interrupt you. You were laying in your bed, scrolling through your phone, trying to find all the missing answers.

„Acid reflux… sour taste… sore voice…medication“, you mumbled under your breath.

Seonghwa watched you for the tenth time this evening - your forehead was creased with concern, not really understanding why your body was suddenly betraying you.

He loved you, he really did. You completed him in ways which he had never dreamed of: you were analytical, prone to detail and observant. But you were also prone to anxiety, in danger of getting lost in your own destructive thoughts.

„How many hours can one google this shit“, he muttered under his breath.

„Suffering…Surgery…Depression“, you coaxed as your voice broke from fear of what was about to come.

„Okay, that’s enough“, he sternly entered the room, sitting at the end of the kingsize bed.

„What is?“

„You doing this to yourself, y/n. We’re going to find a solution baby, but this is not it“, he folded his arms authoritatively.

„Seongie, please. I have to research this, I have to understand. I don’t want to be in pain anymore“, you sobbed quietly.

„I know, baby. But reading blog entries from strangers for hours only stresses you out. How many times are you overthinking the same problem? Like, that doesn’t help. Don’t you think?“

„No“, you snapped back.

Seonghwa knew that it was pointless to argue with you. After all, you were a thinking person whereas he was more of the feeling nature. How was he to distract you from your endless mind chatter?

Suddenly, an idea struck him.

He pushed the blanket away and started kissing your shins.

„What are you doing?“, you asked irritated.

„I am helping you getting out of your head and back into your body, princess. Just relax.“

„Seongie, I don’t want to relax. I want to read and think. I need to overthink, I need to focus on my fucking problem!“, you snapped desperately.

Seonghwa didn’t break eye contact as he was kissing upwards, getting dangerously close to your core.

„See baby, I know this is what you want. But it’s not what you need. What you need…“, he paused to take off your lacy panties, „is to take a break from thinking. Let me help you with that.“

Seeing your precious pussy made him inhale sharply. No matter how often he got to bury himself in between your thighs, he always cherished it like it was the first time.

The colours, the taste, the smell - he was biting his lip in anticipation.

„Ugh, fine“, you gave in and fell back on to the mattress. Seonghwa‘s hand slowly reached for your phone, placing it behind him.

„My poor baby. So stressed out“, he cooed in between your legs.

„Even your beautiful pussy is dry. That’s no way to live, don’t you think?“, he asked seductively.

Slowly, he placed wet kisses all over your core, taking his time to arouse you properly.

Luckily, that didn’t take long.

„So wet, so fast, princess“, he hummed in admiration.

„Like I had a choice“, you snapped back at him.

His cheeky giggles filled the whole room. He knew what effect he had on you and he loved it, thrived off of it.

„Even if you’re acting like a brat right now… I can’t think of anything else but eating you out. Isn’t that crazy, y/n?“

You pushed your hips against his face, ushering him to finally do it. His plan was working without you even realizing. You were no longer thinking about your doomed health, but his tongue circling around your clit.

„Seongie“, you whined.

„Yes, my love?“

He batted his Bambi eyes at you, playing innocent. You grabbed a fistful of his long hair and pushed him into your pussy, making it utterly clear that you were done waiting.

Like a real man he devoured all of you, instantly. His tongue slippery circling around your throbbing clit, his long fingers quickly pushing in and out of your heated entrance, turning you into a trembling mess right in front of him.

Your sticky juices were dripping down his cheek as he finally came back up, grinning from ear to ear.

He didn’t say a word but just watched. Your chest was breathing heavily, eyes shut and mouth wide open.

„Bingo“, he applauded himself. He got up swiftly and laid down next to you, grabbing your delicate hands and squeezing them lightly.

„Baby, what are you thinking about now?“, he asked smoothly.

„Not a single thing“, you answered truthfully.

„Not one thought?“

„No, it‘s like you fucked me brainless“, you mused.

„Shit, I like that“, he said with a big grin. „Can we, like, do that again?“

[hanggarae]

now i’m next to you ..

florist!jeonghan x f!surgeon!reader, 5.3k words fluff, angst, reader’s family sucks, hurt/comfort, slow burn (?), mentions of surgery obviously, a little suggestive right at the end, part of waves will take us away series !

being a surgeon was no doubt tough, and you definitely found the work rewarding enough as it is, but the mysterious flowers left on your desk (a scribbled heart in place of a name of who it’s from) are definitely a plus too

“hi mrs park, this is the bouquet you wanted” jeonghan smiled at the elderly lady, as far as he knew, she was visiting her granddaughter that had recently given birth, “congratulations, for you and your granddaughter”

“oh thank you jeonghan! you’re always such a kind young man, sometimes i wish i had someone like you in my family” jeonghan laughed happily at her comment, cheeks flushing a cool pink. he was somewhat used to it at this point but it always made him sheepish.

jeonghan owned a flower shop that was a ten minute drive from the hospital. because of this, he got orders often delivered there. he knows he could just hire someone to do deliveries, it’d make things a whole lot easier for him, but the feeling of being able to do this for people himself always leave a warmth in his chest, especially when they pass him later to say how much they loved his flowers.

“hey jeonghan!” jeonghan looked around to find seungcheol and joshua waving him over, he smiled before walking to meet them.

“another order?” seungcheol asked taking a sip of his coffee.

“yep, you guys on break?”

“uh huh, and before you ask, no yn isn’t. she’s in the surgery room right now” joshua told him, a small smirk tugging at his lips, a matching one working it’s way on seungcheol’s too.

“shouldn't you both be texting your girlfriends or something?” jeonghan groaned, “thanks for stealing my two best friends by the way, really appreciate it”

“look maybe that’s what you need to finally make a move on yn. you’ve been trying to for what? ten months?” seungcheol told him pointedly.

“nine months and eighteen days, but hey who’s counting?” jeonghan deadpanned, “besides, what makes you guys think i even want to date yn? huh?”

his two friends stared at him unimpressed for a few seconds. he’d spent the better part of the last year sticking around the hospital longer, even if his deliveries were done, just so he could spend a little more time with you.

“okay i do want to date her.. but that’s got nothing to do with you two clowns!” jeonghan hissed. “and the two of you better not say anything because she’s headed here right now” speeding up when he caught sight of you. “yn! hi! how’ve you been?” a smile plastering on his face automatically.

you smiled at this sight of jeonghan with your two work friends, joining them quickly.

“jeonghan hi! i’ve been good thanks, just a stressful day, how about you?” you smiled at him, the stresses of the day melting away with ease.

“stressful?” jeonghan frowned. it was clear from your voice how the day had taken a toll on you, “good thing i know the perfect thing for you when you’re stressed! are you free right now?” he whispered the last part to you, grinning when you nodded, immediately dragging you somewhere.

jeonghan had taken you to his car, ensuring you the entire way that it’d be worth while.

“okay, close your eyes” jeonghan cooed causing you to roll your eyes, making an exaggerated show of covering your eyes with your palms. “you can open them now”

when you opened them, jeonghan held a beautiful small bouquet of jasmines in his hands toward you. “they’re known to be stress reliefs, thought you might like them”

jaw slightly agape, you stared at jeonghan in awe for a few seconds, “they’re so pretty jeonghan, thank you” you told him gratefully taking the flowers from his hands. slowly, the guilt started to creep up in you, “but really- you didn’t have to! here let me pay you-”

“it’s fine, don’t worry about it. i hope you like them yn” he told you warmly, fondness swimming in his eyes.

clearing your throat you told him it’s about time you head back in, the both of you walking back to the hospital together. when you went back to your office, jeonghan headed back to his two friends.

“guys this sucks” he told them dejectedly, frown pulling at his soft features. “she’s totally not into me. like at all”

“han, you’re being dramatic. she definitely likes you, she literally always waits for you to get here” joshua reassured him, rubbing a hand on his shoulder for good measure.

“no shua you don’t get it! she likes me but just as a friend- which i’m okay with don’t get me wrong, but i know she doesn’t like me that way and-”

“dude you sound like you’re in middle school, just ask her out and if she says no she says no, nothing you can do about that” seungcheol told him calmly, taking a sip of his coffee.

jeonghan glared at him before hitting the back of seungcheol’s head (not too hard but it still made seungcheol whine). “you’re in no position to tell me anything mr waited three months to confess to his patient and was the reason she almost had a broken leg forever”

“you can’t talk either mr fake dated a girl and couldn’t confess for two months because he was too scared” jeonghan said pointedly to joshua after hearing his laugh, “neither of you are in any position to say that i should just ask her out and that it’s simple”

joshua laughed at his friend’s pout once again before patting his back before he and seungcheol headed back to work.

“so just take it easy until the next appointment and then we’ll see what needs to be done from there” you smiled at your patient. she was a high school student and had a surgery for her elbow. “it’ll take roughly 6 to 8 weeks to heal fully but it all just depends on your body’s ability. take it easy at rehab too, don’t push yourself too much alright?”

“got it, thank you so much doctor” the young teenager smiled at you. she laid back against the headboard of the hospital bed while she waited for her parents to come pick her up in an hour, her eyes drifting around the room and landing on the bouquet of jasmines you left by your computer.

“those are really pretty” she said, you followed her eyes to see she was talking about the flowers jeonghan had given you earlier.

you laughed a ‘thank you’ before thinking for a few seconds, “i’ll be right back, just press the button if you need anything, okay?”

when you were out of the room you quickly pulled out your phone, fingers searching for jeonghan’s contact. “hey jeonghan, is it alright if i can place an order really quick? this high school girl just had a surgery and i was wondering if i could just get her a few” you trailed off at the end.

“sure! i’m at the shop right now so just give me around 30 minutes? how long till she leaves?” jeonghan told you from the other side of the phone.

“her parents are picking her up in an hour, thanks so much jeonghan”

“no problem. i’ll see you in a bit” you heard before the tone for the call ending.

you headed back inside, going over the last of the paperwork to get the girl discharged, all you needed was the parents’ signature. you decided it’d be best to reassure her for now, she wouldn’t say it, but you could tell she was nervous. you told her more information on how she should care for herself over the next few weeks.

“jeonghan do you want to hang out later- why do you look so stressed out?” jeonghan’s younger friend and employee seungkwan looked at him confused.

“huh? oh a friend called and said they needed some flowers quickly, short notice” jeonghan mumbled not meeting his friends’ eyes.

seungkwan eyed him suspiciously, the gears turning in his head, “thought you hated when people asked on short notice? don’t we have a whole policy that we reject it?” seungkwan said with mirth in his voice.

“we do? seungkwan you should stop being so sensitive you can’t turn people away just because it’s short notice” jeonghan said turning to him, teasing lilt in his voice.

“what- you’re the one who came up with it not me!” seungkwan said to his boss, voice growing loud, “whatever, i just wanted to make fun of you for being so in love with yn that you’re doing all this for her”

“who said it was for yn?” jeonghan mumbled while his eyes turned back to the bouquet he was making.

“oh please! it’s obvious! who else would you go through all this trouble for?” seungkwan laughed.

jeonghan ignored his friend, turning all his undivided attention to the bouquet. it mainly consisted of yellow roses in the center with a few pink tulips and sunflowers around them. it was wrapped with a white ribbon, a small tag attached with the card reading ‘get well soon! it must have hurt ㅠㅠ please take care of yourself so you can feel better quickly :)’ truth be told jeonghan wasn’t doing this entirely just because you asked but because he genuinely wanted to do something for the poor girl. a surgery when she’s pretty young couldn’t have been easy and she’s braver than half the people he knows. picking up a small chocolate box from the convenience store next door, he set it in his car’s passenger seat with the bouquet. jeonghan sent you a quick text letting you know he was on his way before he turned his playlist on and headed to the hospital.

“yn!” jeonghan shouted before running to you, “here you go! she hasn’t left yet right?” he doubled over catching his breath.

you laughed a little at his antics before letting him know she was still waiting, “hey why don’t you come with me to give them to her?”

“are you sure?”

“yeah don’t worry about it. come on let’s go!” you lead the way back to the room.

when you returned with jeonghan you saw that she was still just waiting, scrolling through her phone looking bored out of her mind. you felt bad and realised you could’ve gotten that new junior doctor to keep her company.

“oh hi you’re back! with..” she trailed off when she saw jeonghan but her unasked question was answered when she saw the gift bag in his hands. jeonghan handed the bag over to her, smiling at her reaction to the flowers.

“these are so pretty! doctor your boyfriend’s really talented!” she giggled observing the flowers more. she was so entranced by them that she didn’t notice the awkward atmosphere engulfing the room when you quickly tried to deny what she was implying.

you were cut off by the message saying that the parents were here and were too distracted to see jeonghan leave, and you were too distracted to see the disappointment on his face.

after everything with the girl was settled, you headed back to your office. tired after the long day, you settled back into your chair stretching your limbs. you smiled to yourself when you spotted what was on your desk. it was a messy collection of a few flowers, there was no delicacy to it at all and you know that jeonghan would look annoyed at whoever ‘crafted’ (although he’d probably argue this wasn’t even a craft) the poorly put together flowers. there wasn’t even an official tag with them, it was usually just a torn off sticky note that you could get at the front desk. and as per routine, all that was on the note was a scribbled heart and a ‘good luck for tomorrow’.

for a little over half a year you’ve been getting these, but you still don’t know who it’s from. you don’t even know who in the staff delivers them to your desk because it can’t be a patient or visitor, they don’t have access. it never fails to put a smile on your face and you always secretly hope they’d give you some hint of who was sending them. you put them in your bag, heading to your car so that you could go to dinner with a few of your friends.

“you look extra happy today” your friend sooyoung teased you, giggling at how the warmth quickly spread across your face at what she said.

“it’s obvious why, did your secret admirer send you the flowers again today?” seulgi added, “what were they today, huh?”

“shut up guys” you groaned, “it’s not a secret admirer, it’s just someone being sweet and appreciating how much surgeons do! is that so wrong?”

“oh yeah definitely” nayeon teased, “someone would definitely get you flowers everyday just because they appreciated how good of a surgeon you are”

you sighed as all three of them burst into a fit of giggles before nayeon spoke up again, “so who is it?”

“isn’t it obvious?” seulgi said before you could answer, “it’s obviously jeonghan. who else is at the hospital and has relation to flowers?”

you shook your head at her reasoning, “it can’t be jeonghan. i thought it was at first too but the flowers are way too messy to be jeonghan’s. i’ve seen the flowers he keeps buried in the trunk of his car and even they’re more put together than the ones that the mystery person gives me”

“true” sooyoung spoke up, “we’ve seen these flowers, they’re all uneven. they look like they were taken from someone’s garden. i doubt jeonghan would give yn flowers that ugly if he liked her”

“hey!” you shouted, suddenly feeling offended on behalf of who was gifting you the flowers, “don’t call them ugly, they’re sweet” you pouted.

sooyoung laughed before hugging your side, “guys she’s already defending her secret offender, it’s so cute!”

you groaned again, burying your head in your hands while your friends continued to make theories on who was sending you the flowers. when you thought back to how seulgi thought it was jeonghan giving you the flowers, you remembered that you never paid him for the flowers from earlier. jumping, you quickly found his contact and called him.

“jeonghan! you didn’t let me pay for the flowers” you pouted though he couldn’t see it.

“oh so you- oh wait you mean the ones for that teenager?” he got rid of the teasing lilt immediately, although you were a little curious what he was going to say at first. “eh, don’t worry about it”

“jeonghan i owe you so much for the amount of flowers you’ve covered me, you can’t keep doing this it’ll end up driving you out of business”

the sounds of jeonghan’s soft laugh melted throughout your ear, “i told you yn, don’t worry about it. i like doing it for you..” the call stayed quiet for a few seconds, almost like jeonghan had something else to say, “uh i’m gonna go to bed now so i’ll talk to you tomorrow, alright? i’ve gotta finish a few orders for a wedding so i’ve got an early night”

“oh of course, sorry to have kept you up” you quickly told him, “but remember i’m going to pay you back!” you ended the call with both of you wishing the other good night.

for the rest of the night, you ignored your friends’ teasing in favour of stuffing your face full with the expensive meal at the restaurant you guys decided to splurge for, mind thinking about the mystery person sending you flowers.

at the next day at work, nothing much happened. you were battling a pounding headache from the night before and luckily you didn’t have much to do today besides rounds.

you stopped by the staff room that seungcheol and joshua are usually at, oddly enough jeonghan wasn’t with them today. ‘oh right he said he was busy with the orders for that wedding’. you waved at them before finishing off your rounds, if you were lucky, you’d be able to finish early and spend the rest of your shift relaxing while you hoped for your headache to subside.

that’s exactly what you did, checking up on some of your patients recovering after surgery or doing their rehabilitation before sitting in your office. you looked at the clock, 12:36- almost time for lunch. your eyes widened before you quickly checked your bag. in your rush to get out this morning and because of the headache, you never packed your lunch for today.

groaning, you searched for any places nearby that you could go to for lunch. satisfied when you found a cafe that was only a ten minute drive away, you put it into your navigator app.

when you got there, you quickly dismissed your original plan of getting the food to go and taking it back to the hospital. the cafe was right next to a park, so the tables outside the shop were in the park itself. the ambiance and sounds of nature was beautiful on a day like today, it was sunny but not too hot to the point where you were sweating buckets.

you took your food and sat at one table, taking a few pictures to remind yourself to bring your friends back here someday.

“yn?” a familiar voice drew your attention. “it is you!” you voice took the seat across from you.

“jeonghan? hi! how’d the orders for the wedding go?” you asked him, happy to see a familiar face.

he smiled at how you remembered what he had planned for today, “they loved them, thankfully. other than that i didn’t really have much to do today and there wasn’t any orders for the hospital either so i decided to just hop by the cafe”

you nodded as you listened quietly to him, taking sips of your coffee in between your sounds of acknowledgment, “yeah i don’t really have much to do either, but i’ve still gotta head back to the hospital when my lunch breaks done. this place is really pretty though i need to come back here more often” you sighed happily, pointing towards the beautiful park.

jeonghan hummed, agreeing with you. the two of you spent the rest of your break talking with each other, happily passing the time by. you checked your watch and saw you had about twenty minutes left of your break.

you bid jeonghan goodbye before driving yourself back to the hospital making a beeline straight to your office. oddly enough the flowers were there already, one day you were going to find out who’s behind it all you swear.

your ears perked up at the sound of your phone notification until you internally groaned when you saw who it was.

you loved your parents, you swear you did, but sometimes you couldn’t deal with their ridiculing. nothing could ever satisfy them- not even being a great surgeon! as soon as you did one thing that they wanted, here came another expectation they wanted you to meet. it was ridiculous! you weren’t a teenager anymore you were an adult, but they didn’t understand that.

you sighed as you opened up the text from your mom, feeling a little bad because all she just asked you to join her for a family dinner. you immediately texted her a ‘sure, can’t wait to see you all!’ after making sure your schedule was free that day.

the day the dinner rolled around, you did your best to make sure you looked great. it wasn’t rare for your family to ‘poke fun’ at how you looked, whether that be at how you generally looked or how you were dressed.

satisfied with your appearance, you grabbed your perfume, dabbing some onto your neck, collarbones and wrists. checking to make sure you had everything, all you had to do now was wait for the taxi to come pick you up to take you to your parents’ house.

most of your family was there, it’d really been a long time since you’d seen most of your aunts, uncles and cousins. you weren’t exactly sure what the occasion for all of this was when you agreed to come but you learnt it was to celebrate your younger sister’s engagement.

you hugged her, happy and surprised. you both giggled like teenagers when she showed you the ring and you hugged her again, truly so happy for her.

when the excitement died down a little, your parents started to nag you with questions. “yn when are you planning on dating someone?” your mother asked you, “your sister’s two years younger than you and she’s already engaged, just how old are you going to be when you start looking for someone?”

you were hoping her intention wasn’t to have your entire family including relatives listen to her scolding you, but right now your relatives were trying to hide that they could hear everything being said by acting like they were having their own conversations- but it was fairly obvious all the attention was on you and your parents.

“uh well.. i’m not sure yet. when the right person comes along then..” you didn’t face them properly and mentally berated yourself for it. how could you expect them to finally acknowledge you as an adult when all you could do was turn into the little kid that was scared to disappoint them? “besides, i didn’t really have time to look! i’ve been a surgeon for a year and it took 8 years of training” you grew quiet at the slightly mad looks on their faces.

“we didn’t raise you to make excuses for yourself and not take responsibility yn” your father told you harshly.

you nodded, too drained to argue back. they’d drop it after a week or two and you really didn’t have it in you to draw even more attention to yourself. so you swallowed the lump in your throat down and blinked back the stinging tears forming in your eyes.

after another twenty minutes, you decided it was time for you to leave. their ridiculing wasn’t letting up any time soon and you were sure you wouldn’t be able to go the rest of the dinner without having a breakdown right next to your uncle who only wanted you to hand him the salt.

you made an excuse at their questions, “i’m being called in at the hospital” you told them.

you stepped outside, the cool summer air hitting your face causing the tears welling up for the last 30 minutes to finally start falling. you sat on the curb, silently crying to yourself for a few minutes. you sighed frustrated when you realised you didn’t bring any money to pay for a cab ride back, thinking you’d stay with your parents for the night.

you scrolled through your contacts before you realised that all of your friends were busy tonight.

there was only one you weren’t sure of.

jeonghan was sitting on his friend’s couch, hanging out with a couple of his friends when he got your call. he answered normally, not bothering to move to another room until he heard you speak.

you sounded so small, so hurt- he could practically hear the tears in your voice. biting back sobs you asked him if he could pick you up from the address you’d send. jeonghan was so confused, as far as he knew you were at your parents’ for a dinner. you’d told him a few days ago and you seemed so excited for it.

he quickly explained to his friends that he had to go and he wasn’t sure how long it’d take. jeonghan waited for you to send the address before starting the car, quickly driving to pick you up.

jeonghan thought about you the entire drive over, worried about what happened to put you in a state like that and angry at whoever made it happen. you were inconsolable over the phone and all he wanted to do was hug you and comfort you, telling you how much he loved you and that you didn’t deserve what happened to you.

your sobs died down a little, but you still sniffles every few seconds when stray tears would escape you. the sound of a car pulling up caught your attention and you looked up to see it was jeonghan, he looked so stressed.

you felt guilty when you saw him. ‘what if he was sleeping and he woke up for his?’ you thought to yourself, regretting having bothered him.

he crouched down to bring himself to your position as you still sat on the curb, a fresh set of tears forming in your eyes when you saw your friend.

“yn..” jeonghan said softly, worried and cautious. “can you tell me what happened please?”

you shook your head while you fought against your body and the urge to start sobbing again, “it’s so- so stupid, jeonghan. i’m sorry i bothered you, you’re probably so annoyed”

“hey hey, i’m not annoyed at you. if im annoyed it’s at whoever made you so sad” he told you, gently rubbing away your tears, heart breaking at how more just kept falling to replace the ones he wiped.

you explained everything to jeonghan from your sister’s engagement to the way your parents practically humiliated you in front of everyone.

he looked at you for a few seconds before getting up and walking over to the front door of your parents house. before he knocked on it, he unlocked his car and told you to sit in there rather than the dirty curb.

you were too drained from the night to question what he was up to, you’ve known yoon jeonghan long enough to know that you wouldn’t be able to stop him anyway.

he came back a few minutes later, looking frustrated but a little satisfied with himself. jeonghan went to the trunk of his car, pulling something out. when you saw him do so, you smiled a little, expecting him to give you a beautifully arranged bouquet of flowers like he always did when you expressed to him you were stressed and he’d always explain the specific choice of flowers while you admired them.

what you didn’t expect was for him to instead show you a messily arranged bunch of flowers, they looked like they were freshly picked from someone’s front garden. he reached over you to grab an old receipt from the glovebox, scribbling a little heart to the back of it before attaching it to the bunch of flowers. he handed it to you, grinning and happily laughing at your confusion.

“you didn’t expect it, huh?” he asked you, still giggling.

“n-no i didn’t- does this mean-?”

“that i’ve been the one leaving you those ugly little flowers on your desk everyday? yeah. expect well- it wasn’t really me leaving them- i mean obviously they’re from me to you but then one actually putting them on the desk was either shua or cheol-”

you laughed at how he was tripping over his own words, as cool as he wanted to look he was still a little nervous confessing to you.

“i’m so mad” you deadpanned, trying not to let the corners of your lips lift into a smile when you saw the worried look on his face.

“you mean to tell me that i’ve been trying to play detective for the last few months all because you didn’t want to tell me!” you whined, pouting at him.

“it was supposed to be a fun way to confess! i just didn’t think it’d take you this long to figure it out!” jeonghan laughed again when he realised you were joking. “actually, in the end, you weren’t even the one to realise. i told you!”

you rolled your eyes playfully at him, “oh well thank you for finally realising i was clueless about the whole thing. what did make you finally want to admit it anyway?”

jeonghan went silent for a few minutes, reassuring you that he was simply trying to find the right words to say what he needed to.

“when i heard you tonight.. i realised something” he looked at the empty street.

“on the phone you sounded so.. sad. it made me sad too and it made me realise that i was wrong about how i thought i felt about you for the last few months”

“i mean that i thought for the last few months that i just liked you- a crush kind of. and that i wanted to go out with you” he quickly added when he saw the worry flash through your face, “i realised that if i only liked you then i wouldn’t have felt how i did today. and it made me realise that i love you a lot more than i thought. and i don’t want to just go out with you but i want to try to make sure you never feel like how you did today ever again”

“so basically what i’m trying to say is, i love you yn, and i hope someday i’ll be in love with you, and you the same for me” he finally looked you in the eyes.

it was a lot to take in at once. from the dinner, to jeonghan telling you he was your mystery admirer to him telling you he loved you- it was a long night to say the least.

you thought about it, and you definitely felt the same. you wouldn’t say you were in love with him, but you definitely loved him- and wanted to see what a future life with him was like. jeonghan was an amazing person, he’d been the one to bring you joy for the better part of your first year as a surgeon.

leaning over the stick shift, you gently pressed a kiss to the corner of his lip, smiling at his it curved upwards. you met his eyes before speaking, “i really really like you too- i think i might even love you. and i definitely want to be with you, jeonghan”

jeonghan smiled again, index finger tilting the underside of your jaw up bringing you closer to him and his lips to yours.

“hannie? you ready yet?” you called out to your boyfriend, trying to decide on which necklace to wear.

you decided on the pearl one jeonghan had gotten for you on your anniversary, struggling a little as you tried to put it on yourself.

you felt the ends being taken from your own fingers as they secured the necklace in place, you looked through the mirror to see jeonghan, his hands now coming to circle your waist and pressing kisses on your neck from the back to the side, eventually making his way to your collarbone.

“han..” you sighed, smiling when his eyes met your own, “we don’t have much time left until we have to get there”

“i’m sure your sister won’t mind if we’re a little late” he said but pulled away anyway in favour of doing up your zip like you’d asked.

“oh yeah definitely” you said sarcastically before giggling at your boyfriend’s sulking, “come on, i’d rather my family doesn’t murder me for being late to my own sister’s wedding” in reality you knew you still had plenty of time and you definitely wouldn’t be late, but you still didn’t want to take any chances.

“if they try saying anything i’ll tell seungcheol to threaten them”

“what happened to the guy who once marched into my parents house and lectured them for ten minutes about how they should treat me better?” you teased him.

“he realised he’s scared your parents will end up saying no to him when he asks for their daughter’s hand in marriage” he laughed, his hands finding their way to his pockets while he kissed you again.

you tried to hide the fact that you were flustered by clearing your throat and checking your purse to make sure you had everything, but jeonghan saw right through you sending you a teasing look before grabbing his keys.

“yn?”

“hm?” you turned around to look at him.

“i love you” he smiled, warmth swimming in his brown eyes.

“i love you too” you walked over to him, pressing your lips to his own.

[beachy--head]

Drabble time! This one takes place during 10x11. @himbo-jackson-avery posted about this episode, which made me rewatch parts of it, and my brain took this as permission to go into overdrive, what-if mode.

___

April’s bridal shower is in full swing when he opens the door and reluctantly lets himself inside the room. He doesn’t want to, would actually love to be very far away from this room, but he has to be here, because that’s what friends do, right? They go to each other’s events and big days, even when they don’t want to. And he and April are friends, or at least they’ve been trying very hard to be, so here he is, using his 20-minute break between two surgeries to show his face at the social event of the day. 

April is in the middle of opening her gifts, her sisters surrounding her in a sea of shrinks and dirty looks, and he grabs some food before parking himself in a corner of the room, far from the action. From the corner of his eye, he sees Stephanie and Leah joining the celebration, staying with Webber near the buffet. He feels no inclination to join them: he’s fine staying on the periphery, almost hidden from view, so people don’t look at him (people in general. He’s not thinking about anyone in particular, no sir).

So he stuffs a whole brownie piece in his mouth before finally turning his attention to the guest of honor. April looks so excited to open the next gift, wearing an expression that Jackson finds absolutely adorable (friends are allowed to think that, aren’t they?). She’s the picture of innocence as she opens the box, but her smile quickly drops, and Jackson chokes on his food when he sees the pearl thong she’s holding in her hand.

Luckily, no one is paying attention to him, except Webber, of all people, who raises an eyebrow and shoots him a curious look. With watering eyes, Jackson tries to cough as discreetly as possible and to regulate his breathing. Because it wouldn't require much effort to picture her wearing it, and only it, and a friend should fight really hard to prevent his brain from providing him with a (extremely enjoyable) visual, so he clears his throat and awkwardly looks away.

“It’s for your wedding night, for when you and Matthew…”

Now this mental image is one he’d be really glad to avoid, but her sisters keep going.

“There’s no reason to be embarrassed, we all had our first times too, right ladies? We wanted to give you the lingerie and some tips. The pearls, by the way, are for the inside.”

“Stop, just stop talking,” April begs them, starting to get fed up, and he wholeheartedly agrees with her, but he would breathe a little better if she’d stop holding the damn thong. 

“But Matthew’s your first real boyfriend, we’re trying to help,” and he should leave, right? Prep for surgery and forget the whole thing. Things are only going to get more awkward as they go on, and he should definitely go before he does something stupid.

“And he’s a great catch, and you don’t have the best track record with men.”

“No, she doesn’t have any track record. When I found out you had a boyfriend, I was like, ‘Don't make any sudden movements!’”

Something stupid like yelling at the Kepner sisters that April doesn’t need any tips, in general but especially in that area, and throwing them out of the room, for example. He may not have been a “proper boyfriend”, but he can still defend her against her family’s cutting remarks.

But then, something even more amazing happens. 

“Oh my God, stop talking to me like no man has ever found me sexy!”

“Duckie…”

“And stop. Calling me. Duckie!”

A feeling of pride (and of something he definitely doesn’t want to think about) washes over him as he watches her chew her sisters out. He remembers what she said in surgery about her childhood nickname, and he can’t help but stare at her, like everyone in the room. She’s a swan, and he’s really glad she’s finally standing up for herself and reminding her sisters of who she really is.

“And a surgeon! A freaking kick-ass surgeon who, by the way, has had sex before!”

Behind April, Cristina bursts out laughing and looks straight at him, giving him a thumbs-up, so he's feeling extremely relieved when an intern suddenly materializes next to him, whispering that his patient is about to be taken to the OR and that everything is ready for his surgery. He gives one last glance to April, now standing next to Arizona. His mouth curls in a hint of a smile, but he quickly rearranges his facial expression before following his intern and leaving the room.

(He doesn’t know it yet – not that he has any doubts about it – but he finds out just a few weeks later that pearl thongs suit April Kepner really, really well.)

[rendy-a]

I saw the househusband au and thought of how Ruggie would be as a househusband. You can decline if you’d like to ^^

Of course, I’ll take it!  I hope you enjoy this househusband musing.  Thank you for requesting.

Ruggie’s frugal nature follows him to your home life.  He knows how to scrape by on very little and he doesn’t see why you should live any differently.  He takes advantage of sales, which leads to very eclectic meals at home.  Some days, you’ll have pasta topped with things you swear pasta isn’t meant to be paired with.  Other times, you might have soup ten days in a row because it was such a good sale.  Ultimately, when he proudly shows you the growing savings account, you can only smile and continue to indulge him.  He is just so happy to have that safety net for once in his life!

You’ll never need to call a handy man when you’re married to Ruggie.  He is endlessly creative at solving problems around the home.  If things break, he is pulling out his phone to watch videos on how to repair it.  Don’t call someone, he can do it!  And finally, if he really can’t fix it, he will find a way to repurpose your old junk for new uses once you’ve replaced it.  He is the type to turn old TV’s into pet beds or aquariums like you see on Magicam.  Waste not, want not!

Don’t go to an expensive hair salon, manicurist or masseuse, Ruggie will gladly do those things for you!  Even if he didn’t know how to do those things before, you can bet he is going to learn how to!  Why pay for someone else to do these personal things for you when your loving spouse can instead?  Plus, he gets all warm and fuzzy inside when he gets to rub your head while washing your hair or hold your hand when filing your nails.  It’s also couple’s time!

Back in the old neighborhood, Ruggie used to take care of all the children like they were his siblings.  These days, he still seems to be well known by all the neighborhood children.  If you go for a walk, you are guaranteed to have at least one child run up and ask your spouse if he wants to come play.  “Sorry, I’m a little busy right now but maybe next time.  Shishishi.” 

After a long day of housework, he likes to lay his head in your lap and get his ears rubbed.  It’s pleasant to card your fingers through his hair and rub the velvet-soft ears.  He sighs with satisfaction and snuggles deeper into your lap.  It’s a task you don’t mind at all, but you still like to tease him about it.  You tell him he is getting as lazy as Leona, laying around all evening like this.  He responds that he certainly feels like a prince when you treat him like this.  You suppose a few extra minutes might be ok tonight.

You arrive home at the usual hour and open the door to your home.  Ruggie hears you enter and pokes his head out of the kitchen to tell you dinner is almost ready.  You take off your jacket and rub your aching shoulder, it was a long day!  Then you smile at the mouth-watering aromas coming from the kitchen and head to the dining room to await what promises to be a delicious dinner. 

You don’t have long to wait before Ruggie sets a plate down in front of you.  It does look delicious, but you can only frown at it.  Ruggie sees your expression and asks, “Something wrong?”  You look at him, “This is steak.”  He looks sheepish, “Yeah, so?”  You give it another look; it’s a good cut of meat.  “What did you do?”  He looks away and says, “What, a guy can’t make a nice meal for their spouse?”  You give him A LOOK.  “Ok, fine, fine,” he says with a sigh. 

“You know my Grannie,” he starts, “the most wonderful, amazing old lady that ever lived?  The one who single-handedly raised me without ever asking for anything in return?”  You narrow your eyes, “I do seem to recall such a woman, yes.  Go on.”  He swallows and smiles nervously before continuing.  “Well, she is going to have this surgery on her knee.  The doctors say she should get a nurse to help her out for a while after the surgery.  Only, I was thinking, nurses are expensive and I’m home all day anyway so…why doesn’t she just come stay here while she recovers?”  You raise an eyebrow, “How long is this recovery time?”  He rubs the back of his head while answering, “One month.”

Granny Bucchi is a firecracker of an old woman.  She tells the craziest stories, both about young Ruggie and her own life.  Your favorites are obviously about Ruggie and you ask for at least one embarrassing story each day.  You tell your spouse that you’ll have so much blackmail by the end of the visit, you’ll be feeling like Azul.  He does not seem amused by the idea, but you plan to make the most of this opportunity.  You’ll be getting foot massages for at least a year on this.

The biggest downside is that you are really feeling the lack of privacy.  Once or twice, you did slip away for some private time with your favorite guy but the mischievous smile and laugh that Granny gave you the next day always makes you feel like a misbehaving teenager.  So, when the month was up, you were rather eager to send Granny home to Sunset Savanah.  You drive her to the train station and wave from the platform as she gets on the train.  Right as the train starts pulling away, you see Granny look at Ruggie and give him a conspiratorial wink.  What was that about?

When you get home, Ruggie tells you Granny left a gift and tells you that he will bring it out.  He emerges from the kitchen with two flutes of champagne and an open bottle grasped between his fingers.  You smile and take a glass from him.  As you ‘cheers’ with your glasses, you ask your spouse, “What does Granny want to get us liquored up for?”  Ruggie gets a conspiratorial grin (obviously this is an inherited expression) and says, “Oh, she said now that we don’t have an old woman around the house, maybe we’d talk about getting some great grandchildren for her.  Shishishi.”  You were alone and had all night free; who knows, maybe Granny will get her wish.

[everythingwrongwithizumi]

Pairing: Daryl Dixon x fem!Oc

warning: Death, graphic depictions of death, maybe not so accurate surgery, dead children, graphic depictions of child deaths, cussing?, insinuations of relationship abuse and child abuse, dead walking,

w/c: 2k

a/n: This was… best with me in this one and let me know what y’all think. This was just like an introduction sorta the storyline will pick up next chapter don’t worry! >< I hope you all enjoy and this is my first time writing something like this so please let me know what y’all think!

CHAPTER ONE. That Day

How did this happen…

What the hell went wrong…

I don’t understand…

This is wrong… everything’s wrong…

One Day Before Outbreak

7:48 pm

“-Yes I understand, but what you need to know is that my schedule is busy and my hands are tied…. Will you just drop her off before I start my shift, I have back to back surgeries already and it’s my first week…. I know, I know just- hold on let me call you back”

My eyes shifting towards a man standing in the middle of the road. I felt myself reach for the seatbelt to unclip it as I slowly came to a stop. what the hell? What is he doing in the middle of the road surrounded by trees? And why were his clothes so bloody? The familiar click of my seatbelt went off and the belt sprang back to where it came from.

Before I could unlock my door and get out I made eye contact with him. It all happened so fast it felt like it was slow motion. The look in his eyes… they looked so… empty and sad. The look was one familiar to any surgeon, he had given up…

I watched as a semi truck ran straight into the man from the other lane. I could barely register the honking before it was too late. The truck had come to a stop so I took that as my cue to leave for work.

With the sun nearly escaping the grasps of the horizon, the world darkened as I pulled into the hospital I was just getting to know. As I walked into put my things away I got a text from Adam, my boyfriend. He let me know that my daughter was in the daycare in the hospital.

After I put my things away and searched the OR board I was indeed right about my back to back surgeries. Excited I went to scrub in to prepare for my first surgery of the day, an Arthroscopy.

The surgery had been a success only taking about an hour. After I was finished closing the incision I thanked the nurses and everyone else then I left the OR and scrubbed out. “Hell of a surgery,” one of the male residents complimented me with a smirk in his face.

I watched as he purposely raised his arm over his head to stretch his biceps. “Ryan. It was a Arthriscopy,” I deadpanned and crossed my arms. He shrugged, “And it was done beautifully by a beautiful surgeon.” I rolled my eyes and decided to go check on my daughter before my next surgeries which would have me not taking any breaks.

As soon as I walked in I noticed the kids or rather the lack of them. It was just my daughter and four other kids the same age. The hospital allowed children between the ages of 3-6 to be placed under their care so naturally Mae got along with the others seeing as she was just a 5 year old.

I ran up to her and grabbed her pulling her into a giant hug, her squeals of laughter filled the air, a sound I loved. “Mommy did you save a life yet,” she asked making me grin and lightly pinched her cheek, “you bet your peach I did!”

After tickling my daughter some more I bit farewell promising to come back after my fifth surgery.

Day of outbreak

6:34 am

I was sweating.

It was my 7th surgery this shift and I still hadn’t had time to check in on Mae. Focusing back on my surgery it had been tough and go for a while now. We had to put him in bypass because his heart couldn’t take the stress of not one but two tears in his artery.

Successfully and tiredly we finished removing the tissue and bone spurs causing the pain in his back however… another artery blew… and then another…

“Time of death 8:02 am”

I pulled my mask down and stretched my arms taking a moment to look around the room. After about five minutes and three the gloves in the bin and started to scrub out.

While I was in the middle of scrubbing my finger tips, red nail polish began chipping before I looked up and the sight before me caused my eyes to widen and to drop the soap in the sink creating a soft thud.

Two days earlier

I was smiling ear to ear as I watched Mae carefully apply a fresh coat of red paint to my nails. The look on her face was one of pure concentration as her brows furrowed and her lip was pulled in by her top teeth.

“Daddy’s gonna be home in a minute, you might wanna hurry it up,” I teased the little girl and she showed no interest in listening or paying attention to me.

Once she was in my pinky nail the door swung open causing her to mess up slightly. I looked up to see Adam in his usual dead eyes and unamused expression. Recently he’s been distant and distracted. There were nights I’d have to beg him to hold me while we slept.

Again, as usual he made his way straight to the bedroom of our small two bed apartment. His shoes laid messily by the front door next to a neat pair of mine and Mae’s. Mae began to hold tears in her eyes as she looked up at me. I stared at her not knowing what she expected me to do and I only smiled, “What a beautiful job you did. How does Friday sound for a touch up?”

I watched as her lower lip quivered and I carefully pulled her in for a hug. I could hear her sniffles and soft cries, “I’m sorry I messed up, it was an accident please don’t be mad at me mommy.” Instead of responding I started rocking back and forth softly before shushing her quietly.

“You mind telling me what that was,” I questioned Adam in the kitchen after I put Mae up for a nap in her room. “What are you going on about this time,” he replied not looking at me. My eyes narrow as I get closer to him “I have never once raised my voice at my daughter or belittled her for accidents,” I kept my voice low and spat the last word out at him.

He slammed the kitchen knife on the counter before pointing it at me “Well maybe that’s the issue. You need to do your job as a mother and discipline her mistakes. I told you years ago I didn’t want this, and you just had to keep her. If it wasn’t for you and your mistakes I wouldn’t have to be getting on her for her own mistakes.”

I was speechless. Yea sure, Mae wasn’t planned, but calling her a mistake was low. “What the hell is wrong with you? You can’t even say her name you pig-“ I wash cut off by an oddly familiar sting to my face. Gripping my cheek I glared at him as he walked out of the kitchen disregarding the food he was about to prepare and walked out.

I glanced at the front door where it was just my shoes and Mae’s shoes neatly placed by the door.

Day of outbreak

8:07 am

I watched as the patient, Mr. Henry bit off my anesthesiologist face off causing a panic. After two nurses attempted to pull him off he bit one nurses neck and scratched the others face. Soon the anesthesiologist was woke back up and bit another nurses arm and soon the OR was chaos.

I watched as two nurses ran out of the OR, into the scrub room before the anesthesiologist grabbed one of their caps pulling her back and taking a chunk out of her neck right in front of me. The other nurse had ran out of the scrub room. As the blood splattered on my face I took that as a sign to run out of the scrub room.

The hallways was no different. Chaos spread and soon my worries flew to Mae on the second floor of while I was in the fifth. I ran to the elevators and made it in through the screams and bloodshed. Ryan and another resident who was gripping his arm ran into the elevator with me just before it closed. Then pressed the first floor as he wanted out as soon as possible.

“What the hell is happening,” Ryan nearly shouted causing me to flinch. It was clear he was looking to me for answers. In all my years of medical school and residency I had never been taught what to do when humans began to eat other humans like they had rabies.

“I-I…” I didn’t get to finish before Ryan’s screams surrounded the small box we were in. The other resident had grabbed his shoulders, pulled him back and began eating his cheek. I screamed in terror but immediately closed my mouth as his blood sprayed everywhere.

The elevators dinged and the doors opened to doctors and nurses running around urgently. They seemed aware of what was going on and there was someone being devoured at the nurses station. Gasping, I ran to the daycare center only to find two little kids eating the intestines of one of the workers—the same one that greeted me earlier.

Tears filled my eyes as they didn’t take notice of me. I looked around and found my baby’s perfect little shoe and the blood. I walked over to the area and walked to the wash area.

It felt like the walls were closing in, the pastel blue and ocean animals mocking me as my baby girl stood facing me. Half of her face was missing, a giant chunk on her neck and right leg was gone now replaced with seeping blood, her tiny nails once painted red were stained red along with her hands. Her hair was a mess as were her clothes.

I wanted to gag, to run, to hide, to grab her and pull her close and never let go even if it killed me. As soon as she came running to me, her little hands reaching out to me I knew I had to leave, leave and never come back.

Tests blurred my vision as I ran out of the center. I could hear the little groans and growls behind me until I heard a scream. I quickly turned and saw the little boys and my little girl attacking a patient.

I chocked out a sob and ran to the nearest exit. The sun was beating down in me and all I heard were screams and gunshots. I needed to get to the parking garage my car was at. Thankfully it was on the first floor and as soon as I made it to the entrance a car showed no signs of stoping as it crashed into the bar that allows cars in and out.

I watched as it crashed into a nearby restaurant which was also crawling with people eating other people. I stood there, my car only ten feet in the garage. How did this happen…. What went wrong?

[bengiyo]

Be My Favorite Ep 10 Stray Thoughts

Last week, Kawi and Pisaeng started dating and Not immediately ruined it by making everything about him as always. Not outs them repeatedly and tries to use it as an in with Pear. He breaks things off with Kwan, who genuinely likes him, and gets his ass handed to him by Pear. Meanwhile, Kawi is spiraling that once again his mistakes are causing problems for others, and Pisaeng pushes Kawi to try to see life more optimistically and just try to take care of each other. Pear is having her own problems as she reckons with her mom finding success as an artist after leaving her family to pursue that art.

Hopefully we get Max back this week.

Love us coming back to Kawi and Pisaeng affirming their connection and Pear affirming that she and Not do NOT have one.

YES, MISS PEAR! COME THROUGH, SIS! She said, “Kwan is my friend and you are a dick. DICK IS ABUNDANT AND LOW IN VALUE!”

I want to say here that while I absolutely despise Not, I think Title is giving a great performance in this role. He’s very good at playing disaffected man who is also the source of his own problems.

Okay, this boy just put hands on Kwan. Let’s stomp his ass.

I’m with the dad on “The more you forgive, the stronger you get.” It’s so easy to burn yourself out in righteous rage. I was there for a long time early in the BLM movement, and all I succeeded in doing was giving myself a bunch of a stress-related health issues. The work I do now is about uplifting now and less about fighting. We talked about this on @the-conversation-pod in The Eighth Sense about how forgiveness isn’t about admitting the other party is right. It’s about accepting what happened, determining the boundaries you need to establish for the future, and then focusing on what’s important to you. Holding resentment traps you in the moment you were last offended. You become a living ghost.

Oh interesting. Kawi is reading Crazy Rich Asians.

They are crushing me with the fathers today. I’m going to need Tom Phollawat and Kob Songsit to get off my neck. In all seriousness, Kob is clearly ridiculously talented. Krist is responding to his emotions better than he has with anyone else in the series.

There is something so poignant about Kawi doing everything he could to try to save his dad, still losing him, but getting closure this time because he was able to say goodbye to his father before the surgery. I’m trying not to cry right now.

I love that the first people we see Pear interacting with after that talk with her dad are Pisaeng and Kawi. Love that she made sure to clear up any angst between them. It’s beautiful because the show says she has a right to be disappointed about how things went even as she commits to maintaining two important friendships. These boys are throwing themselves before Pear about who should be castigated more and I love that.

Yes, now that Pear has affirmed her support for gay love, let’s go hang out with the gays. Welcome back, Max. I’ve missed you. You look amazing as always. Love these boots.

I love Max. He’s correct. Just because we know what’s going on doesn’t mean we also don’t need to be told. Up until we’re told, we technically just suspect. Kawi is lucky to have community.

Before I engage with Pisaeng’s mom’s latest form of gaslighting, I need to know what show they’re watching on this projector in the background.

Sowing doubt into your son’s first real relationship is so cruel. Pisaeng knows exactly what she’s doing, and Gawin is playing his hurt and offense completely legibly.

I’m really loving the theme in this show that there is a difference between avoiding misery and finding happiness.

I do love seeing folks figure out the early parts of their relationships. Kawi doesn’t like Pisaeng avoiding his problems with his mom around him, especially when Pisaeng came to him for comfort. Now we get to see these two sort out how intimacy is going to work for them.

I’m never going to complain about parents turning things around and choosing to support their kids, but I don’t think I like Pisaeng faking a conflict with his mom in the hopes that Kawi will be intimate with him.

The mom’s smile is giving Gates McFadden at the end of Make the Yuletide Gay (2009).

I’m really enjoying the way Gawin plays Pisaeng as flirty or cheeky.

I’m obsessed with Max wearing this big black jacket but having these shorts He has such long legs that the juxtaposition fees intentional.

The Ace Friend and Gay Slut duo is undefeated. Kawi being on the ace spectrum doesn’t surprise me. I’m sure people are going to chide Max for how he spoke to Kawi, but I get Max. He’s a sexual being and it’s clear that some of his experiences weren’t great. There are things to unpack there. However, this show is about accepting people as they are and understanding where they’re coming from. We’re not aiming for perfection. We’re aiming for honesty and kindness. Kawi does need to consider the needs of his partner if he’s going to be in a long term relationship with someone who isn’t on the spectrum like him.

Oh, Kawi. Don’t pretend to sleep.

For a moment I really wondered if the snow globe would transport Pisaeng, but he’s already rejected magical help for his problems.

I’m really hoping this show does something interesting with the asymmetric sexual desire between Kawi and Pisaeng. We were here before during SOTUS and it’s hard not to recall that.

The amusement park thing is not subtle, and I’m not sure how to feel about it. Kawi has always wanted to visit a place full of excitement and thrill, but is here just to soak in the vibes and eat food. Pisaeng isn’t on that wavelength and is a bit frustrated.

Okay, so the preview seems to indicate that Pisaeng maybe did time travel. Unsure about how we went from a kinda botched date to their first sober kiss and implied first time.

I’m not sure where I sit on the sex stuff this episode. I think I’m going to leave myself in this moment of uncertainty until next week to see what we learn about Pisaeng’s potential time jump, and Kawi’s follow up on Max urging him to consider the role of sex and intimacy in romance.

[cyb3rscoups]

Pretty Woman AU (pt 3️⃣)

No warnings for this one just the usually cursing

Full Collection

She’d blanked out a long time ago, hyper focusing on not seeming like she was just taught proper etiquette two days ago.

“I am not selling it.” Namor insists, neglecting the very expensive food on his plate to argue with Attuma.

“You are in a rut, Namor. I’m your only out. Just take it and free yourself of this misery.”

“Your greed will be the fall of you. Always wanting more. You keep those sly hands off my company or I’ll rip you apart.”

Namor tossed his napkin to the side as he sighed, fixing his suit and his expression. “Ms. Okoye.” He held a hand out.

“Hm?” The woman looked up, her mouth full of pasta and her eyes clueless. Namor chuckled and took her hand, pressing a soft kiss to her skin.

“It was lovely to meet you. Enjoy your dinner. Good luck with this one.” He saw himself out of the restaurant, leaving Okoye much more oblivious than when she got here.

Carefully, she swallowed her food. “What just happened?” She prompted a tense Attuma who held his glass of wine with a strong enough grip to break.

“Finish eating. You did great.”

“And you? What did you say to him?”

“It was business, Okoye. Business he didn’t atone to when he should’ve.”

Okoye furrowed her brows. “Well, it seemed like you were being the asshole by the way he left.”

Attuma’s jaw ticked with a scoff. “You know what. Let’s get you home and stuff that pretty mouth of yours full of something else.”

“Ooh yay.” She grabbed her purse with a beaming grin. “Y-you do mean your dick right?”

———

Soft splashing water echoed through the bathroom as the couple sat in the tub together. Attuma nearly passed out on her chest as she tugged at his hair, maneuvering it into a set of braids

“Namor has filed for bankruptcy three times in the last two years. His employees are quitting left and right and his investors don’t trust him anymore. His company is shot. I want it.”

“And what would you do with it..” Okoye started the part the other half of his head.

“Sell it. Then boom, I’m rich.”

“Aren’t you already?” She smirked.

“I’ll be extra rich.” He tilted his head to the side, his fingers tracing her legs under the water.

Why he would need to be more rich than he already was, she wouldn’t know. When would it be enough for him?

“Tell me your story. Tell me how you ended up on the boulevard.”

Okoye scoffed just thinking about it. She took a pause from her braiding to brace herself.

“I was well off growing up..not rich not poor. Then this guy, I was real into in high school somehow convinced me to move in with him after graduation.”

She remembers how hard her parents tried to get her to stay. Her dad at least, her mom just sat on the couch with her third glass of wine, chuckling as Okoye packed.

“It was nice for like six months. Then we had a fight about rent or some bullshit like that. He hit me over the head with an iron and sent me to the hospital.”

“Jesus…where is this guy?”

“Calm down, Mr. man. He’s in jail now.” Attuma’s body relaxed against hers again and she was able to finish his hair as she continued.

“They had to shave my head for brain surgery cause he fractured my skull. Damn bastard. The only person at my bedside was my friend Nakia. She turns tricks too. We moved in together after the incident. Ol’ dude got arrested on a drug charge. The rest is history.”

Attuma shifted his body around, careful not to send any water over the edge as he turned to face her.

“So somewhere under this..” He took a strand of hair between his fingers. “Is a pretty nasty surgery scar?”

“I wouldn’t say it’s nasty. They did me pretty good. Even got some tattoos to cover it up.”

His eyes almost popped out. “On your head Okoye?”

The woman just nodded. “Wanna see?”

They rinsed off quickly, wrapping their respective towels around themselves and Okoye moved to the sink.

“I don’t usually glue em down since I switch em up nearly everyday.”

Attuma tilts his head in confusion. “Because?”

“Makes my regulars feel like they’re fucking a new ‘exotic’ black girl every day. Kind of sick when you think about it.” She pulled the wig off in one swoop and tossed it to the counter. “Tada!”

Attuma moved behind her, taking in her new appearance. He could point out the surgery scar, the scar from where her ex hit her, and the tattoos that covered the skin.

“It’s beautiful.” He whispered, against her neck as his arms started to snake around her waist.

“Why thank you Mr. man.” Okoye ignored the flutter in her chest as he touched her. “And now that that’s done, I bid you goodnight.”

She tried to push his arms from her waist but her efforts were futile as he pressed closer to her. He took one hand and turned her chin to face him.

“What?” She asked quietly as he gazed at her with something she couldn’t place. It made her heart flutter and she didn’t like it one bit.

“Kiss me, Ko.” He leaned closer, letting their cheeks graze together, he could moan at the contact.

“I don’t kiss on the mouth. Too personal.” She snatched herself back, looking into the mirror at him. She saw the pained look that washed his face.

“Not even with someone you’ve spent three days with..”

“No. Not unless they plan on making me a wife. Last time I checked, you were paying me to hang out with you. So…you won’t feel this lips on yours for an eternity. Good night Attuma.”

She waited for his grip to loosen and free her. Once it did, she made no hesitation to exit the bathroom and get dressed elsewhere.

Attuma braced himself against the sink with a sigh.

———

The next morning was awkward between them only short ‘good mornings’ to start until he told her what the plan was today. A housewarming.

“Namora, my lawyer, and her wife RiRi.” Attuma muttered to her as he started to take his braids out, a soft curl formed in his hair that softened his demeanor.

Okoye stood beside him, applying mascara to her lashes and putting her wig back on. “Will there be buffalo wings at such a thing?”

Attuma smiled at the comment, “No. Namora is vegan and a control freak so all food will be disgustingly green.”

“Y’all rich motherfuckers suck.” He struck a stinging smack to her ass causing her to jolt up and squeal. “What the fuck was that for?!”

“Watch your language. I let it slip at dinner cause I knew Namor had an eye for you but you cannot- no you will not let one curse slip or so help me god-“

“Alright! Goddamn it.” Another stinging swat to her and she gasped. “Ow! Take it easy!”

“Then stop cursing.”

Okoye rolled her eyes as she made her exit. From the next room she yelled. “You better be fucking me later!”

———

“Okoye…how foreign!” The jealous woman leered at Okoye as Attuma left her to ‘mingle’. “So you’re flavor of the month.”

“Excuse you?”

“Oh! Don’t take it personally.” The other woman placed a hand to her shoulder and glared at her friend. “Attuma is one of our most eligible bachelors. We’re all trying to land him.”

“Well I’m not trying to land him. I’m riding his cock and spending his money.” Okoye grinned as the women’s face fell and she walked away to find a drink.

She grabbed a champagne glass from a caterer and found herself on an empty couch, staring into the glass as Attuma talked it up with Namora on the other side of the room.

A body slid in next to her and then a nudge to her elbow.

“Now what can I do to take that pretty little pout of your face, Okoye.” Namor smirked as he looked her over with a gleam in his eye.

“Get me the hell out of here.” She mumbled, sitting back into the couch with a huff.

“I’m afraid we won’t be able to get past big bad over there without drawing attention. How about a toy.”

Okoye scoffed at the man and his dashing face. “What am I? 5?”

“Come on. Adults can play too.” Namor reached into his pocket pulling out a finger trap and setting it into her lap. “I keep it at all times, sometimes play with it in meetings.”

Okoye gave him her glass and picked up the trap, setting her index fingers into it and pulling. She found herself smiling softly at the toy.

“I haven’t seen one of these since middle school..”

“Yeah? You like it?” Namor pushed the hair on her shoulder back, smoothing it down with a gentle touch.

“Mhmm.” Okoye hummed, playing with the toy without a care for where she was.

“Keep it, beautiful woman like yourself deserves to be happy and stay happy.”

———

“I have to say Attuma. I’m impressed with her but I gotta know where you found her. Out shopping? Cafe? Hell, did you hire her on a website?”

“No…we just crossed paths I guess…” Attuma paid Namora no real attention as he focused his gaze on Okoye and Namor on the couch.

Giggling and talking in hushed tones like best friends. He couldn’t help the furrow of his brows or the discomfort on his face as he looked at the two.

“-obviously she’s a catch. Even Namor looks like he’s smitten-“

“Namora, she’s a hooker. She stays on the boulevard and turns tricks.” He blurted as his anger bubbled over. What the fuck was she doing? Getting friendly with an enemy.

Namora scoffs, looking between Attuma and the woman on the couch. “Are you kidding me?”

“No. I wish I was joking but no. I got lost in your car and ended up in her part of town. She gave me directions and I gave her an offer. Happy?”

Attuma fumed as he ran a hand through his hair and went searching for alcohol to ease his nerves. Jesus what was he thinking? Why did he just tell her that? No one had ever asked about who he was with previously.

Back on the couch, Namor made his exit from the party, leaving Okoye with a kiss to her hands and a wink.

She continued toying with the finger trap until she felt a hand on her arm.

Namora sat beside her with a friendly grin. “How’s the party?” She beamed.

Okoye smiled back, tucking the toy away while she spoke. “It is great. Your home is so beautiful.”

“Well RiRi is spoiled rotten. But whose fault is that but my own..” Namora chuckled. “Gosh, I just can’t for the life of me believe he did this.”

“Who did what?” Okoye tilted her head curiously.

“How Attuma turned a boulevard whore into classy plain jane.” A certain venom was laced into her voice as her grip on Okoye’s arm turned lethal.

“The hell are you talking about?” Okoye muttered.

“Oh he told me and honestly I was suspicious that day he left the office early to some ‘urgent matter’. I guess he was just trying to fix you up to fit in with the big leagues.”

“Let me go.” Okoye tried to snatch her arm from the woman but her nails only dug in firmer to her skin.

“Now that I’m looking at you…you do seem like a 20 buck slut.”

———

The ride home was silent, tense. One word from either of them and the dam would’ve broken loose.

“Do you want to order lunch?” Attuma asked, kicking his shoes off.

“Don’t bother.”

“Okay. That’s the 8th sly comment you’ve made since we left. What the hell is up with you?”

He could hear her laugh from the bathroom as she started to gather her things.

“You know it’s funny you ask because I mean why even bother dressing me the fuck up and teaching me all this etiquette bullshit if you were just gonna rattle off to all your pervy friends that I’m a hooker!”

“What?!”

“You told Namora that you plucked me off the street!! And she wouldn’t let me forget it!!” She yelled every word as she snatched her clothes off their hangers and bunched them up in her arms.

“I didn’t know she would confront you about it! I wasn’t prepared for her questions about you! I’m sorry!”

“You couldn’t at least save me some dignity! You know what Namor was right.”

“Oh what did that dickhead say about me now huh?!”

“You’re weak and you don’t care about anything but your own greed!”

“That’s bullshit! You know it’s bullshit! And where the fuck are you going?!”

“I’m leaving this hellhole. Your deal is off.”

“Don’t you walk away from me, woman! You are not leaving me!”

“Watch me!” Okoye made a beeline for the door.

Attuma beat her to it, pulling her body back to him and yanking the things out of her hands.

“You’re not leaving.” He muttered almost painfully as rage coursed from her body.

“Fuck you!! Fuck your money! I don’t want this anymore!”

“I’m sorry, baby. I’m so sorry. It’ll never happen again. I swear. Just don’t go. I-I love you.”

Now when’s the last time someone said that to her. On his knees he dropped, pressing his head to her stomach, rubbing up her thighs and butt.

“I’m sorry Okoye.” He whispered, beginning to lift her dress.

He didn’t get far until her grip was on his jaw, forcing him to look up at her. His gaze was hopeless and desperate as tears glossed over his eyes and hers.

“You can’t fuck your way out of this Attuma.”

“Then what can I do?”

“Tell me why…why did you do it?”

Attuma scoffed at the reason now. How childish was he to see her talking to the man he was trying to buy and get pissed beyond coherent thinking.

“Namor..you were talking to him so friendly and he- he likes you Okoye. I didn’t like it.” He admitted, rising to his feet.

“We were just talking! He gave me a stupid toy to ease my anxiety!”

“I didn’t fucking like it. He can’t sweet talk you right under my nose like that.”

“Jealous man.” She smirked, wiping the tears from her face.

He smiled up at her. “Yeah. I’ve never cared before but with you….it’s different. I don’t know.”

Okoye stepped back from him, looking at the mess around the floor.

“My clothes are collecting dust.” She crossed her arms as Attuma moved to pick them up.

All bunched up in his hands, he held them out to her, ready for her to take them and walk out the door with out so much as a second thought.

“What are you doing?” She chuckled. “They belong in the closet don’t they?”

@theeblackmedusa @tvreadsandsleep @pilesofpillows @xblackreader @mamajankyy @dontruinmymorning @attoye

[haikyuuwaifu]

8

Breakeven: The Script

Masterlist

Warnings: Drama, Mild Angst, Mentions of Violence/Villain attack

They say bad things happen for a reason But no wise words gonna stop the bleeding 'Cause she's moved on while I'm still grieving And when a heart breaks no it don't break even, even, no

Y/n felt her body shaking, as she made her way toward the hospital. She had been in class, working on study guides with her students when Mic told her to turn on the news. What she wasn’t expecting to see, was her Katsuki in the fight for his life, against someone that was supposed to be considered his ally. 

Arriving at the hospital, Y/n stepped out of the car, noticing that all the commotion from the media outside had quieted. No one uttered a sound as she made her way toward the entrance. Before going inside, someone behind her cleared their throat. “We’re all rooting for him ma’am.” A man stated, raising the symbol Katsuki made whenever he was on television. It was something he would do to let her know he was okay. The reporters around him echoed their own supportive sentiments, chanting the hero’s name and holding up his sign. Y/n gave them a watery smile and a nod as she made her way inside. 

Inside the hospital, Y/n could see nothing but chaos as doctors and nurses were trying in vain to assist patients. “Y/n!” Shinsou called, pulling his friend into a hug. “They’ve got Katsuki on one of the upper floors, he’s in surgery right now.” The man whispered, as she gripped his hands tight. Making their way to the elevator, they stepped inside. A few minutes later, the doors opened, and Y/n was pulled into a hug, by one Mitsuki Bakugo. Mitsuki was the strongest person she knew, second to her Katsuki. As much as Y/n wanted to break down, she knew she needed to be strong. Holding the woman close, Y/n stroked her hair and whispered into her ear. Nothing but encouragement and confidence that Katsuki would make it through, as the woman sobbed.

Hours later, Y/n found herself sitting outside the room. Katsuki was out of surgery, but the doctor’s couldn’t say if he was going to survive the night. They had done all they could, and it was now all up to him. She’d felt better after screaming at Midoriya, but that didn’t mean anything if her Suki didn’t wake up to hear about it. Reaching for his hand, she gave it a squeeze as she stroked his cheek with her other one. “You have to make it.” She whispered, tracing the features of his face with her finger. “We have so many things to do Suki.” She mumbled. “We have to buy a house on the outskirts of the city. With lots of acreage so all our friends and family can build their additions. Even if you grumble about it, I know you’d secretly love having your mom so close.” “You need to give Kouta another shovel talk before he asks Eri to marry him someday.” She whimpered, burying her face into his side. “I want to start a family with you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, and I can’t do that if you’re not here.” Y/n carried on, rambling about the dreams they’d shared, the plans they’d made, and hoping on everything, that he would wake.

In the early hours of the following morning, Y/n was awoken by a hand squeezing her own. Fluttering her eyes open, she was surprised to see Katsuki staring back at her, his gaze soft. “The last thing I remember thinking,” he whispered, stroking her hand with his thumb. “Was that, if I died...at least I died loving you.” He uttered, as tears threatened to spill down his cheeks. “It didn’t matter how terrified I was, it didn’t matter if you’d hated me for being so reckless” He sobbed, as Y/n pulled him close. “All that mattered, was that I got to love you, and I saved that kid from dying.” Y/n let out a watery laugh, holding him close, as he clutched on to her. “I am so fucking proud of you Suki.” She cried, kissing his lips softly. “You are so fucking amazing, and I can’t be more proud of what you did out there.” The blonde gave her a squeeze, leaning back just enough to look down at her. “Marry me. I don’t care if it’s soon, I don’t care what anyone thinks, I don’t care about the media or shitty fucking Deku.” He began, eyes full of determination. “I will not continue going on, without you being my wife.” “Katsuki! You damn brat!” His mom shouted, barreling into the room and pulling her son into a crushing hug. Masaru followed behind, a soft smile on his face. “Don’t you ever do that to me again you shit.” Mitsuki hissed, as she held her palm out. Masaru set the box in her hand, and clasped Bakugo and Y/n’s hands around it. “This is a family heirloom, it’s been passed down through my side, and I just knew the little shit was going to say something.” Mitsuku stated, cheeks wet, as she and her son quietly cried. “I could not be more proud to have you as a son Katsuki, and I could not be more proud of your choice in wife.” She stated, her smile wobbly. 

Katsuki gave his mother the same wobbly smile, squeezing her hand, and taking the box. Flipping it open, he smiled, looking back at Y/n. Y/n could only laugh, words unable to form in her shock and excitement. With a nod, she held her hand out, as Katsuki gingerly placed the ring on her finger. Cheers could be heard from the hallway as a snooping Touya shared the good news. Outside the hospital, reports and journalists were shouting, cheering for their hero, and congratulating him on his upcoming nuptials. 

Prev/Next

[cassiopeiasdaughter]

Cowboy like me part 3

Javier Peña x fem!reader

word count: 2.6k

warnings :language, bad grammar(?) , 2am writing, NOT PROOFREAD (I was bored)

also on ao3

Javier Peña Masterlist

her

Work today was slow, easy cases, few surgeries scheduled spread throughout the day and after your shift was over you would go home and wallow with a bottle of wine and your favorite music playing on the record player.

Well, plans don't always work out and today was a great example. Before what was supposed to be your last surgery of the day you were called to fill out some forms, which would take up probably half an hour and your surgery would be assigned over to another colleague- a man. Of course

You were currently drinking your third cup of coffee for the day, much needed if you wanted to stay awake while reading through papers and forms- and your mind started drifting to the one thing you had been blocking out the past few weeks. Javier

You were so angry with yourself, for letting yourself care about a person who didn't feel the same way about you and honestly, why would he? He had a job, a mission, he certainly didn't have time to play house with you, or anyone for that matter. And since when did you care about someone like that? You were fine being by yourself, always had been. You moved across the world all on your own, left everyone behind and started a new life, alone. And you did a pretty good job adapting, surviving. Proving wrong those who didn't believe in you, those that thought of you as reckless or strange. A troubled soul that's what they called you. All because you didn't want to conform, settle down, play wife and mom with a man you didn't want.

But now, now you had found a man; who was the wrong man for all the right reasons. He is thrilling and full of passion and that sparks something inside of you- a fire you thought you had lost. He excites you, pushes you to continue fighting. He is imperfect, dark, scarred. You don't have to pretend to be someone you aren't with him, because you know you won't scare him away. Simply because he gets it. He mirrors your darkness , your anger, the constant turmoil inside of you.

The night the two of you spent together, was the closest thing to the fairytale inside your head, you could have with him. You remember the way he touched you, and how he spoke to you. His eyes looking at you during something so newfound for the both of you. Everything was perfect, even after, when you laid with him, as if you had done this a million times before, as if it were natural for the both of you, laying naked together in bed, his hands caressing you face, your eyes drinking him in and then falling asleep together, in each others arms.

Well you should have known better. All those things don't matter now. You remember the night you found him at your doorstep, tired brown eyes looking into yours. For a moment you thought he came to tell you how much he had missed you all those weeks you had spent avoiding him. And you knew that if he did that, if he lifted his hands to try and break down your walls, they would shatter on their own. It wouldn't take much effort for you to let him in. Inside your house, your life, your heart. For he, without you noticing, had found a way to sneak in, made himself comfortable and simply waited for you to acknowledge that.

A love confession was the opposite of what you received. You were just another thing for him to worry about, another thing to feel guilty for.

You always expected the worse from people, disappointment being one of those feelings you always had a hard time dealing with. It is also the feeling you never thought Javier could cause. Up until that moment at least.

Snap out of it you think and quickly get up, forcing your mind to focus on work.

You aren't sure what time it is when you hear it- feel it. One minute you are hunched over a stack of papers, pen in one hand and your head on the other- and the next a sudden force causes you to leap out of your chair and collide with the wall to your right. Your ears are ringing and there is blood on your temple. Everything feels hot, as if someone has lit you on fire. And you can hear the voices of hospital staff and patients screaming, begging for help. A bomb you think, they had planted a bomb in the hospital. Then you remember Steve and the case you helped him with. It was for you, you think, they wanted to kill you and make a spectacle out of it, forbidding anyone from ever helping out the police ever again, making it clear that if you stood in front of Escobars way you wouldn't make it out alive.

But now, the hospital is on fire and people are dead, because of you. The floor is starting to fill with smoke, making it difficult for you to see and breathe. You have to get out. As you crawled to the door and tried to stand up you realized it couldn't open, it was blocked or broken, but you couldn't get it open. You tried not to panic. You had to stay calm. You start weighing your options: you could find something and break the door, free yourself and then deal with whatever was happening outside the room you were in, you could jump out of the window, you were on a low floor and it wouldn't be a hard fall, you could get away with a broken leg or arm, depending on how you landed. You didn't want to think of the third option, you would survive this.

You searched for something- anything- to break down the door. You found a fire extinguisher in the corner of the room and with shaking hands you smashed the door handle with it, as many times as you could, while shouting for help, hoping that someone - anyone would hear. But it is no use, the office you were in was placed in the less busy wing of the hospital, it was not possible that your cries would be heard. Especially now, with everyone panicked and running to exit the hospital.

There is a pounding inside your head, from the fall and you feel so very tired. You continued smashing the door until it cracked open. You squished yourself through the opening and started running down the hallways, trying to escape the smoke. The bomb must have been placed at the end of the floor you were in, where the surgeries took place. So many people dead, so much destruction, families torn apart. As you walked through the hallway you felt like you had been placed inside a different world, a completely different building than the one it had been a few hours prior to this. You wanted to give up and cry, everything was dark and you couldn't recognize where you where or how you would get out. You couldn't find anyone, did you black out when the explosion happened? You don't know.

You were so frustrated with everything, blaming yourself for every mistake you had made prior to this, everything that led you in this situation. You thought of your family and how you should have called them more, told them you loved them. Soon you would be dead in another country and they would have no clue. You thought of Connie and your chest tightened at the thought that she wasn't alive or that you would never find out if she is okay. Lastly you thought of him, Javier. How terrible you had been, leaving him, ignoring him, avoiding him, shouting at him the last time you saw him. You wanted to tell him how sorry you were, what a coward you have been. But most of all, you want to tell him that you want to spend your days with him. You need him to know how he is the only person you would share your bed with and the only person that could make you happy in the morning.

And as your eyelids felt heavy and your feet couldn't keep your weight, you succumbed to the darkness, with his name in your mind.

him

Of all the horrors he had faced, the injustice, the violence he'd seen, nothing could have prepared him for this. He had never felt so hopeless before. Losing you so suddenly. How could this happen? How could he let it happen? He should have known, he should have done something to prevent this. Prevent this distraction. So many people dead, pain everywhere around him. But he could only think of you.

He felt panic creep up on him, stealing his breath, locking him inside a cage, letting him suffocate. Unable to do anything to stop it.

The first thing you hear after opening your eyes are the voices of rescuers having found you. They helped you, and a few others out of the hospital. The building was ruined in many places, not many people were killed but there were many injured; patients forced out of their beds, doctors, nurses, families, all of them now placed outside. The doctors and nurses who αre strong enough examine the wounded, along with those sent from another hospital.

You followed the group heading to the first aid station, looking around for Connie, asking the people who worked with her if they had seen her. One of them pointed her to you, far away in the parking lot, with Steve by her side. As you started moving towards her you saw him.

Javier crunched down, head in his hands, breathing slowly.You could cry from the relied you feel, just now understanding what has happened. You ran towards him, as fast as your lungs and feet let you.

"Javi?", you say softly; scared that you are dreaming still and you will wake up.

But this isn't a dream. The moment he hears your voice his eyes open. He looks at you, takes your form in, realizes too that he isn't dreaming. He is standing up now, running to you and you are too. You crash into each other, you are sobbing , repeating "I am sorry"s into his chest, he holds you close afraid to let you go, mouthing "you are okay" in your hair, barely a whisper, loud enough mostly for him to hear.

You don't know how long you stay like that; both refusing to let go. He let's you go eventually; takes a step back and tries to examine your face, check for injuries. His eyes land on your temple and the blood there, his hands carefully inspect the wound and yours close around his wrists, drawing circles in his skin.

"It is nothing", you say and he looks into your eyes, "I hit my head, but it is nothing serious."

"You should-"

"I am sorry" you cut him off with a sob "I am sorry for running away like that and...and avoiding you and then shouting at you the other night.” You rush the words out, not able to keep them inside any longer.

He doesn't answer for a while, not knowing what to say. He just wipes your tears, his hands now holding your face gently, steadily; as if his whole universe is in between his palms. He tips your face and he bends down to kiss you softly, your  lips barely touching. "I thought I lost you", he says, his forehead resting on yours; and you know he doesn't just mean now, because of the bomb. He is talking about all those days you both spent running around, aimlessly avoiding each other, foolishly trying to protect your heart, not knowing then that it had been his this whole time.

days later

He is in your bed now; lying opposite of you, both of you naked. His head shaking disapprovingly, arms crossed in front of him.

"-And I told you, I am not leaving.", you say emphasizing the last words.

"Stop being so fucking stubborn, you made it out alive by sheer fucking luck, I have the papers to get you out of here, take you somewhere safe."

"No, I don't want to spend my life running and hiding.", you answer face flushed and eyebrows raised.

"I can't protect you here-"

"-And I am not asking you to.", you cut him off

"I don't want anything to happen to you, I just can't-", he says, sighing, voice filled with emotion, begging you to understand and give in. Your eyes soften at that, and you move your body climbing on top of him legs placed on both sides of him, the only thing separating you two being the thin green sheets of your bed. His hands move to your hips almost automatically, his head slowly turning to face you.

"Javier, hey, look, I can take care of myself and I know the risks. I am not leaving, not without you.", you say quietly, love filling your voice."Okay?", you ask him, your eyes locked in his and your hands running through his.

"Alright", he sighs at your touch and your words, "alright." he repeats with his eyes closed and his head now resting on your chest. He quickly pulls back eyes open and face tense, once again,

"But if something happens I-"

"Nothing will happen, I will be more careful but I am staying, I am not leaving you, not again.", you cut him off, voice sharp not backing down.

He smiles at his defeat switching your positions; now you lay under him and let him kiss you deeply...

months later

You walk together at night, strolling through streets you've seen a million times before but never like this; with his hand on your waist- possessive and strong and with his leather jacket-smelling of smoke and strong cologne-along your shoulders, talking about your days and your worries.

On one of those nights, while admiring the city at night, faint music heard in the background and the smell of spices and flowers filling the air, he tells you he loves you. He confesses how after his mission is over he wants to leave with you; go somewhere anywhere you want together and build a life with you, children- no children, apartment in a big city- cabin in the woods, it doesn't matter to him, it is all up to you, anywhere you want to go he will follow.

You hold his hand and tell him how much you love him back and you both stay like that, admiring the night sky and enjoying the peace the night brings for as long as you can.

years later

Your favorite song comes on the car radio and he turns it up, without you having to tell him; you play with the ring on your finger while his hand hugs your thigh, his ring digging softly at your skin.

"We are here", he says and gets out of the car. As you walk out, you see an old man, sweet and quiet, with a hat on his head and a smile resembling Javiers on his face. Javi holds your hand as you both approach him.

You smile as you shake his hand and introduce yourself. You laugh when he tells you stories about Javiers childhood. And when Javier slides his arm over your body as you get ready to sleep, says goodnight and kisses you, his boots beneath your bed and your purse on his dresser you sigh and think to yourself

I'm never gonna love again

as always feedback & criticism are appreciated and needed! writing this was very exciting and fun and I hope someone out there enjoyed it as well :) English isn't my first language and this was the first story I've ever written so it is definitely flawed. That being said, I am not opposed to editing it in the future; adding things and removing others. We will see... Goodbye and have a great day <3

Tags: @harriedandharassed

Dividers by: @saradika

[aajjks]

*cough* 10 kids *cough*

TC!dad!JK

indeed, you did not agree with having this grand celebration for your one-week old son but jungkook just does what he wants anyways. you sport a lilac-purple dress with beautiful gold accessories and a match crown atop your head. your hair is in a single braid down your back but lately, you’ve the desire to cut your hair into a bob-like cut.

when jungkook lays his eyes on you, he’s breathless. you look absolutely beautiful and he isn’t shy about letting you know it but you aren’t too happy with him at the moment. your son is just a week old with a developing immune system AND you’re still sore from the labor and surgery. despite jungkook’s compliments, you don’t look or feel gorgeous at all and just want to stay in bed with your son who seems content in jungkook’s arms.

“wait! wait! before we go, he needs these” you open a drawer, grab a pair of matching mittens, and place them on his small hands. “they’re supposed to prevent him from scratching his face and we don’t want that, right seoul? you don’t want to scratch your handsome face~” you coo which puts a smile on the infant’s face.

oh, you’re so in love~

as the guard announces yours, jungkook’s, and jinseoul’s presence everyone is in awe at the little infant in your husband’s arms. everyone bows to give respect to the three of you but mainly for the new addition to the family; your little prince.

“oh, he is so handsome~” coos a woman who leans forward to get a better look at jinseoul who starts whining until you put his pacifier in his mouth.

“congratulations queen and king jeon. if you accept, we come baring gifts for the future king of this nation” says someone you don’t recognize but judging from jungkook’s relaxed state, he recognizes who the man is. all you do is smile and wave as kings, queens, princes, and princesses congratulate you both on the birth of your son; each baring gifts for the infant:

“oh my~ this is, uh…this is a lot. thank you so much”

“y-yes, thank you. we appreciate your gift”

“teething toys? wow! thank you! i’m sure he’ll need that in a few months”

“a sword?! why? he’s only an infant. i don’t think my son needs that”

gifts and gifts and gifts. you appreciate everything, you really do but this is too much. the gratitude of these people are overwhelming and when things finally calm down for everyone to feast, your son begins to cry for food as well.

you don’t hesitate to take jinseoul away to a secluded room and breastfeed him. you let out a sigh of relief as you caress the tiny infant in your arms and enjoy the little time you have to take a break.

“so how’s the first-time father life like, man? you’ve got a one week old baby and a moody wife, sounds like hell” says a childhood friend by the name of kim taehyung.

“the kid looks just like you though. i know that must piss y/n off”

~🫧

As Taehyung talks to him, it’s only stroking jungkooks big ego. Of course, his son came out looking just like him.. and yes, it pisses you off a little because he’s hurt you mumble about it countless of times.

“Of course-it’s like my existence pisses her off, but.. it’s fun- can you tell me how happy I am?” He smirks, Taehyung and Jungkook- they are like two peas in a pod. There is no formality between them despite their status difference.

“how is your wife doing? Why don’t you have a kid yet?” He asks to taehyung, and he wonders where you are, but you were just probably gone to feed his little prince- who gets way too hungry for his liking.

“I’m so happy that yn and I have a baby now… I thought it would never happen- but it did can you believe it?” He gushes- yes it’s true because he never thought he would let him touch you, but now you have his baby.

God is so graceful.

They are both busy eating, but still his mind is stuck on you, have you eaten? Are you OK? You’re not struggling with jinseoul too much now are you?

He knows that you’re still very young and this is really hard, he’s pretty sure you’re not going to give him any more kids… but he will have his way with you.

Patience is virtue.

“mark my words… my son will be the greatest this dynasty has ever witnessed.” Jungkook says to Taehyung whilst staring at a portrait of him and his parents together.

He has a lot of dreams for his one week old old son, and he knows that it’s true, but he’s already fantasizing about how much a great king he will be.

“Yn and I make beautiful children… I know we do.” He almost blushes.. taehyung smiles. You’ve got his friend wrapped around your fingers.

And even though jungkook likes to play really tough but he knows just how his heart really is- it’s really fragile. You should take care of it.

[roosterbox]

July 30 Random Word Almost-Drabble: Tender

Word Count: 603

This is the last of these drabble attempts that I’m doing. For July, at least. I have the next phase of my Twitter Album Project coming up in August, and the first part ended up taking about two months to complete. So maybe I can do this again in October. Maybe I can make them spoooooky ficlets, lol.

Putting this one under a cut, for once, because it starts off a lil… spicy.

Rating: M, for interrupted sexytimes

Warning: extreme sappiness.

@boisinberryjamarama

On the next thrust, Arthur felt the stitches in his side pull a bit too hard. He winced, hoping it wasn’t noticeable.

Eames, above him, saw it immediately. He stopped, going still inside him.

“Arthur? Did I-“

“I’m fine,” Arthur insisted. “Keep going.” He shifted a bit, but the movement jostled his side even more, drawing out a pained hiss. Eames seemed to realize something, shaking his head.

“Too rough on your wounds, my love?”

Arthur wanted to argue. He wanted to squeeze his legs tighter around Eames’ hips, and demand that they keep going. But his lover didn’t seem too put out by this interruption of their activities. As a matter of fact, Eames was looking down at his face with such concern and tenderness that Arthur found it impossible to lie.

“A little bit,” he conceded. Eames shook his head again and pulled out as gently as he could. Groaning at the loss, Arthur threw his arm over his eyes. How embarrassing. And his side still throbbed steadily with his pulse.

“Now now, no need for that,” Eames closed Arthur’s legs, massaging his thighs. “You’ve had major surgery, darling. It comes with certain… drawbacks.” He leaned over to check the gauze dressing. “Hmm. Still looks okay. Did you break any stitches?”

Arthur shook his head. “I don’t think so. Pulled a couple though.” He winced again. “Hurts like a sonofabitch.”

“I bet. Again, it doesn’t look bad, but I could change out the dressing if you like? Maybe use some of that numbing cream we have left?”

“That’s-“ not necessary, he started to say. But another painful throb made him reconsider. “That sounds… yes, please.”

Some time later, side numbed and re-dressed, Arthur laid on his non-stitched side, Eames spooned up behind him. A warm hand, which usually would be wrapped around his waist to rest on his stomach, cupped his hip instead. Trying to put as little pressure on his wound as possible. He hadn’t said anything about it, but Arthur could help feeling a little guilty for cutting their lovemaking short.

“I can hear that beautiful brain of yours thinking too hard from here, Arthur.” Eames’ voice was muffled slightly, buried as his face was in Arthur’s hair. He turned his head to nuzzle the other man’s temple. “It’s fine.”

“But-“

Eames shushed him. “It’s fine,” he emphasized. “No one bounces back immediately after major surgery. I myself was bedridden for at least a few days after my last one.”

Arthur remembered, of course. He’d happily waited on his boyfriend hand and foot until the twin scars on his chest healed enough. And he knew that, if necessary, he’d gladly do so again.

“Besides,” Eames continued, kissing his neck, “We have the rest of our lives to do this. So stop worrying, and let me take care of you.”

It took a moment. Arthur was nothing if not a stubborn creature. But when Eames was right, he was right. Both men let out near identical sighs when Arthur finally relaxed, sagging into Eames’ hold even more.

“Sorry,” he said.

Eames shushed him again. “As soon as you get your stitches out, love, I promise that I will gladly fuck you on every surface of this house. Maybe I’ll even let you fuck me on a couple of them too.” He kissed behind Arthur’s ear, in one of his favorite ticklish spots, smiling at the other man’s quiet laugh.

“I’m gonna hold you to that, you know.”

Eames squeezed his lover’s hand, entwined with his own and clutched to Arthur’s chest. A silent declaration of love.

“I expect nothing less.”

[ramblinganthropologist]

Writober 2023 8 - Toad

Summary: So... do krogan look like toads or turtles?

(this is stupid and set during ME1)

---

Nothing like surviving a shootout with krogan Battlemasters to make you really appreciate being alive.

Also, nothing like surviving a shootout with krogan Battlemasters to make absolutely everything fucking hurt.

“I see you broke another rib, Commander.”

“Sure feels like it, Doctor.”

At that moment, Alistair was out of armor and on one of the beds in the med bay. Above him, Chakwas was scanning him with her ever-so useful x-ray machine, checking to see if he had broken something.

Judging by the look on her face… looks like he had to add to his total.

“Once again, the compression caused a fracture.” Her tone was matter of fact as she put the scanner aside. “Actually, it caused three.”

Three at once? That had to be a record for him…

He would’ve smiled, but everything fucking hurt so he just lay there. “Joker’s going to be disappointed I’m pulling ahead in the broken rib leader board.”

It wasn’t exactly a big match – just himself and his pilot. Between the man’s brittle bone disease and his binder, it was neck and neck. Or should he say rib and rib? Whatever was the right term, he was pretty sure he was currently winning.

What did he win from it? Nothing but broken ribs and the pride he was a fucking mess.

“Commander, I once again have to recommend top surgery for you. You’ve broken your ribs far too many times.” She paused. “But I know your answer – you don’t have the down time needed to recover from the procedure.”

Alistair nodded, wincing. “That and the whole Saren Arterius teaming up with the Reapers to destroy the universe thing. It’s kind of putting a hitch in my plans.”

Not that he had been actively planning to get top surgery at that point. What with his Alliance duties, he didn’t really have the time needed to sit and let his chest heal. Now that he was facing the possible death of everyone he knew and cared about, he had even less time.

Also, he was kind of leading a ship now. Who didn’t love responsibility?

“Yes, I would think that may cause a problem.” Was that a quirk of a smile on Chakwas’ lips as she shook her head. “Please remove your shirt and binder and I can get started fixing your ribs.”

That made the man make a face almost jokingly as he struggled to sit up. “Come on, you know I only wear sports bras when I have the armor on, binders and active duty are a no-go.”

Besides, he was usually in armor for more than 8 hours, and binders kind of had a time limit.

At any rate, Alistair winced as he managed to peel off his shirt and the aforementioned sports bra. Topless, he lay back down, resisting the urge to glare at his chest as he did. Damn thing always caused him problems, even if he didn’t facture in the dysphoria.

“As always, stay still while it’s working and try not to jump up when they pop back into place.” Beside him, the good doctor was setting up the program. “It should take about an hour due to the fact one is cracked in two places.”

Two places – that was a multiplier. He was definitely ahead now.

Alistair nodded as he laid back, closing his eyes to block out the lights from the lab. Nobody would be coming in – he was the only idiot who got hurt on missions on a regular basis. So he had nothing to do but just listen to machines beep as they fixed his ribs.

At least until he heard someone settle in to his left.

“How many did you break this time?” Bo sounded almost amused as she ripped open her bag of chicken nuggets to replenish her energy after using her biotics. “Joker’s sulking in the cockpit because he thinks you beat him.”

He would’ve shrugged – but again, couldn’t move. “I got a double break multiplier, so… add 6 to my total.”

His adoptive sister let out a low whistle before she commenced the KT carnage on her dinosaur shaped nuggets. “You’re ahead by 3. We’ll be lucky if he doesn’t’ throw himself against the wall to catch up.”

Nah – Joker hated getting his  ribs fixed almost as much as Alistair did. Neither of them were exactly looking for intentional breaks. This was more a tally of their bad luck and bad genetics than self-harm.

At least it was for him. He couldn’t speak for Joker, but he was pretty sure he knew the man well enough to figure they were on the same page.

“I’m still amazed you didn’t break more after that guy slammed you into the wall.” Bo was still munching. “You bounced like a superball.”

Alistair winced at the memory – the battlemaster had tossed him like a rag doll. “That makes two of us. I got off lucky with just three ribs.”

“Next time, just dodge the nice toad with the assault rifle.”

Bo’s voice was flat there. She was starting an old argument between them, one that would probably never have much of a conclusion. They were entrenched in their sides to say the least in what was probably the dumbest argument they both refused to let go.

“They don’t look anything like toads.” Alistair shook his head. “Besides, they can tuck into their humps. They’re more like turtles.”

That made his sister snort, as it often did. “Turtles don’t pack heat.”

“Toads aren’t exactly packing biotics either, Bo.”

Another snort. “They might on Tuchanka.”

Yeah, he was pretty sure there were no biotic toads on Tuchanka, partially because he was pretty sure they only existed on Earth and Earth-created settlements. He’d never seen a toad anywhere else – weird alien frogs sure, but not toads.

“When you see an alien toad, you let me know.” He rolled his eyes as he winced. The familiar popping had begun, letting him know that soon he would be shifting into the healing process after the reconstruction.

This was his least favorite part – it made his bones itchy.

“We don’t because they evolved into krogan. Tuchanka made them develop biotics and killer trigger fingers.” Bo sounded so sincere and serious in her spurious assessment of the krogan evolutionary process that he almost believed it for a second.

He would’ve said more, but a heavy footstep entered the room.

“Shepard, the turian said you would be in here.” Wrex sounded impatient. “How long are you going to lie there?”

Thank the Lord he hadn’t showed up earlier…

At the same time, Alistair blushed at the thought the krogan was seeing him without his shirt on. He doubted Wrex cared – no gender in his species had breasts after all – but it was still embarrassing to be caught with his shirt off.

“He’s got three ribs to heal, Wrex.” Bo was digging into her bag of nuggets. “The big guy bounced him against a wall.”

“You’re lucky he didn’t shatter your bones.” Wrex didn’t sound impressed. “When does this finish?”

Oh… judging by how itchy his ribs were… probably about 15 minutes.

At least he managed to open an eye. Just like he thought, Wrex wasn’t impressed at the sight of the Normandy’s commanding officer flat on his ass in the med bay. At least he wasn’t staring – though that might be due to species difference.

“We’re halfway through. I can’t move until then.” He winced as his rib popped into place. “Did you have a chance to check the armor we brought back?”

Might as well have the meeting here… with his tits out… life or death required sacrifices sometimes.

At least that seemed to satisfy the krogan. “He was from a small clan, one of their few Battlemasters. Now that he’s a smear on the wall, they’ll fold.”

He nodded to Bo. “The headbutt wasn’t bad, Shepard.”

Bo beamed as she finished off her nuggets. “Just needs a bit more work and I’ll be knocking you guys on your asses in no time.”

Right, that was just what they needed – a krogan in human form. He would’ve groaned, but that would have just hurt his healing ribs. Instead, Alistair just mentally sighed and hoped she didn’t break her neck.

Maybe he would order her a stronger helmet or neck protection… she didn’t have a krogan’s hump after all.

“I’ll believe it when I see it.” There was a hint of challenge there – Wrex probably wanted to face off with her. If he didn’t know his sister was a lesbian, he would’ve wondered if there was something other than battle love between them.

Thank the Lord – he wouldn’t want to walk in on that.

“Also, what’s a toad?”

Oh, fuck.

Alistair felt his face color as he realized he perhaps hadn’t gotten as lucky as he thought with their conversation. He would’ve apologized immediately, but a large pop caused him to yelp with pain. He saw stars for a moment – healing took no prisoners.

“It’s a type of…” Bo turned to him. “Is a toad a frog, or is it its own thing?”

Through his teeth, he managed to grumble. “Sub-class of frog. One on land, one on water.”

He had needed to look that up two years prior for this very argument, so it came to him easily. He would’ve said more, but… oww.

“Is it vicious?” Wrex sounded interested. “Some of you humans keep calling me a toad when they think I can’t hear them. I might as well know what it is before I start cracking skulls.”

Fuck, he was going to need to talk to the crew if it was happening on the Normandy… but that would come after he was able to put his shirt on.

“You can get high if you lick some of them.” Bo had looked that up too. “Some get big as fuck too, I saw one the size of a dog once on deployment.”

Wrex snorted. “You humans compare everything to those ‘dog’ things.”

True – there was even a TV show about it that was popular on the Citadel. Alistair didn’t exactly watch it – he had the unfair advantage of knowing what a dog was after all – but he had watched in when he had worked at the nursing home in his late teens.

“We got a lot of them, what can I say.” Bo snickered. “And if Al was up to it, he’d probably be telling you he’ll talk to the crew so you don’t have to break any skulls.”

“But that’s the best part.” Wrex almost sounded disappointed. “Can’t we space him and make you the CO?”

Gee, didn’t he feel the love… then again, Bo and Wrex got along well with such a short amount of time. Maybe it was only natural that he would prefer his favorite Shepard to get the top position on the Normandy.

“Fuck no, I don’t want the responsibility or the paperwork.”

In the end, that was what it had come down to – Bo balking at the amount of paperwork she would have to do. Well, that and Anderson recommending him. He would’ve taken the responsibility either way, but still.

“Yeah, I guess he’s got his purpose.” Wrex looked bored as he stood. “Once you can sit up, we have more to discuss, Shepard.”

Alistair resisted the urge to nod as he felt the program reach its final course. “I’ll see you soon, Wrex.”

And then the krogan was gone, leaving him with itchy ribs and a clearly pleased sister. She was unbearable smug in that moment as she leaned over, arm on her knee and her head in her chin like she had just won an award.

“See? I’m not alone with the toad thing.”

He had to resist the urge to groan. “You’re ridiculous.”

“And you’re a sore loser.”

No, he was just sore thank you very much. At least once he was healed he could put his shirt back on and ignore this argument ever existed. It be back to work chasing Saren and the geth in the hopes of saving the galaxy, krogan included.

…

And if you asked him, they were all insane. Krogans clearly looked more like turtles or tortoises. His crew was fucking blind. Maybe he should ask Chakwas to administer vision tests…

[whumpy-wyrms]

Hello hi! Just read the newest chapter and I am Insane

I saw the update and I was so excited I nearly dropped my phone, I was almost normal enough to read it when I saw the wing whump tag, the crowd went insane and it ended up taking nearly 15 minutes for me to start actually reading.

I am insane, your writing is so beautiful.

(This is just me reacting to the entire fic I'm sorry (no I'm not), you don't have to respond to this one)

Anton, the wet cat of a man, watching the trees for an hour each day and counting that as touching grass enough.

He deserves immortality, I think he should get it, he can be trusted yes.

Hjshjshsjsgsjhsjshjshj he's being accommodating with the lights and the textures my heart- (we stan the tisms supporting the tisms)

"But hey, it's for science!" My Absolute Beloved, Anton can do whatever he wants to do he deserves it.

When the when the when the when the autistic wet cats of men communication (Anton and Dew talking at any given time)

The flinch going to the table >>>>>>>

THE LYING ON THE FRONT >>>>>>>>>>>> OHOHOHO YES

GLOWING GREEN LIQUID IN A COMICALLY LARGE SYRINGE YESSSSSSSSSSSSDHSHSFFHSDHHSHKDJFHSHDSJJ i am so normal about this i swear

The descriptions are so beautiful and vivid, have I mentioned I love your writing?

The Cloth Gag Yes

I just had to put my phone down for a second at that line woa I'm not usually one for duct tape gags, but this may have changed my mind on that front

When the man is in Pain and the other man is sat Criss-Cross Apple Sauce

He is in pain for weeks oh my with only Anton for company oh my he is going as insane as I am

He is Breaking someone get him a plushie this is beautiful I am handing him a chicken plushie because he is

the wings The Wings THE WINGS THE WINGS THE WINGS THE WINGS THE WINGS THE WINGS THE

YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE YIPPEE

HE IS IN SO MUCH PAIN HE DESERVES A COOKIE

He is Breaking poor guy ohno

""I'm tired of being scared of you,"" I Am On My Knees Good Sir I Didn't Need My Heart Anyways It's Okay

I am holding him so gentle

A lil kiss on the forehead if he's okay with that

Hold lab birb gentle like hamburger

I am giving him a week's paid holiday somewhere maybe just home for a bit (oh wait that's the lab now isn't it :3 )

What's the Anton doin

A COOKIE

YEASSSS

THE BOI GOT ONE YIPPEE

I was going to say give Dew a weighted blanket but I guess he has one already huh

"maybe four weeks? Fuck, that was insane." I'LL TELL YOU WHO ELSE IS INSANE OVER THIS

"keeping Dew from moving an inch away from his captor?"

Damn that line. Someone fetch me my fainting couch. I must be dramatic and think of this line often.

Anton you're not the birb here why are you cooing

"excusing Dew's mention of his old life just this once" Dew should slip up :3 as a treat :333

Anton is but a silly guy. A harmless, silly guy.

He has never done anything wrong ever. I support Anton's rights and wrongs. But he has not done wrongs. He is so. He is a little guy, ur honour. He should be allowed to do whatever he wants in life.

Birb instincts *sounds of wait hold on wait I need a minute wait*

Dew's got wings now yay :3

Also his clone doing his own top surgery is even better.

Have a good 24 hours!!!! I'm going to go try to be a little less insane about this I swear (difficulty impossible)

Also I wrote the live react thing in a word doc and it ended up 661 words long! Sorry for so much!

AHHH KJDFGSJGF TYSM I LOVE GETTING ASKS LIKE THESE!!!

A CHICKEN PLUSHIE FOR DEW OMG im definitely gonna draw that now :))

Anton and Dew are both silly little guys living in our silly minds rent free

us when Anton does Anything: its okay he was just feeling silly :3

anyway i was giggling kicking my feet the whole time reading this,, these asks make me so happy :) its still such a surreal feeling having people react to my writing and ocs this way AHHHAJSKDGAKJ this means So Much to me you don’t understand. thanks so much again for the support it makes me so happy people like my writing and characters!!!!! :)