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artificialqueens · 2 years

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Masters of the Scene, Chapter 16 (Bitney Parent Trap AU) - Veronica

A/N: Thank you to my star beta reader, @tumble4rpdr, for helping me get this chapter where it needed to go.

Click here for prequels and previous chapters, or here if you’d rather read on AO3.

Chapter Summary: Bianca and the kids return to the Hamptons, where Courtney learns some of the details of her breakup with Fame the night before.

***

Courtney was excited for her kids to come back. She’d missed them, and couldn’t wait to give them both the biggest, warmest hugs the second she saw them. Besides, she knew that she and Danny were flying back to LA that evening, so she was determined to make their last few hours with Adore as nice as possible. She had a glorious lunch planned, as promised, and since she’d had the foresight to do the meal planning and grocery shopping the day before, she was in great shape.

The drawback, the part she was trying not to think about, was having to see Bianca with her fiancée, something she’d been able to mostly avoid until today, when it was going to become a reality, the five of them eating lunch together like some kind of functional blended family. In a way, the shock of it was easier at the party, when she had the element of surprise on her side, and therefore a bit of the upper hand, both of them staring at her with their mouths hanging open. In that moment, as uncomfortable as it was to meet her ex wife’s future bride, she’d felt like she was in control.

Now though, after she and Bianca had been on such a strange journey, after so many moments of unexpected softness and understanding, it was going to be brutal. Because now, she wasn’t thinking of Bianca as just her ex wife anymore—she was thinking of her as a real person again, someone funny and dynamic and loving and who, when it really came down to it, she still cared about, more than she would like to admit. Last night’s FaceTime was a perfect example of that—why couldn’t it always be like that? The four of them, laughing and teasing and having a good time together?

Of course, she knew why. This was the problem. Her heart wanted something that she knew in her head wasn’t possible. Jealousy was an ugly emotion, and it was one that Courtney has always rejected. Or tried to anyway, as best she could. But she couldn’t deny that seeing them together was going to be difficult. In some way, it made her regret coming here, putting herself through all of this.

She hugged a pillow to her chest, eyes slightly unfocused as they followed the lazy circling of the overhead fan. She still had the slightest headache from the wine last night, but she knew it would probably be a good idea to get going in the kitchen so that she wasn’t rushing. She’d already been up for hours, full of nervous energy the second the first rays of sun filtered into the room. She’d showered and gotten dressed, and had just lay down for a few minutes in a sad attempt to meditate. As usual these days, it hadn’t done her much good, her thoughts racing no matter what techniques she attempted to slow them down, so she rose from the bed with a sigh.

She walked past Adore’s room, catching a glimpse of the mess the kids created while packing for Great Adventure. She pushed open the door and stepped inside, wondering how she’d missed this utter disaster before. The room looked as though a tornado had ripped through. Danny’s suitcase was open on the unmade bed, clothes flung everywhere, along with what looked like every pair of shorts and shoes that Adore owned, along with t-shirts and tank tops and accessories. They’d obviously tried a bunch of outfits before settling on the ones they took.

It was the kind of mess that Courtney knew was bound to stress Bianca out, and so she took a few minutes to straighten up. She began to pick clothes up off the floor, folding Danny’s things and putting them in his suitcase, then moving it to Adore’s little bench so that she could make the bed. She returned Adore’s clothes to her drawers. There were quite a few items she wasn’t sure about—they kids really had a lot more overlap in their clothing styles than either of them would have admitted before this summer—so she stacked them neatly beside the suitcase. Finally, she gathered the armful of shoes to return to Adore’s closet, kneeling to line them up on the little shoe shelves.

She was about to get up when she spotted a red shoebox…open and spilling out its contents, dozens of envelopes with her own handwriting on the outside. She felt a stab of pain in her chest, a voice telling herself to just shut the box and leave it alone, all the while pulling out one of the letters and reading it, just a little bit here and there, her own words leaping off the page and gutting her like a knife.

For my beautiful wife,

I woke up this morning before you, and for a few seconds, looking at your face, I couldn’t comprehend how lucky I am…

…you are my rock, and without you, I would be lost…

…I feel every kiss, burned into my skin like the most searingly perfect memory. And when you touch me, your fingertips…

…This is forever love. I know that in my soul. I’ve always known it. You are my past, my present, and my future. You are my eternity…

Courtney lowered the letter, tears blurring her eyes. She shouldn’t have done this, shouldn’t have looked, shouldn’t have allowed herself to open those old wounds. It still hurt so much, so much that it was sometimes too much to bear. She wiped her eyes, returning the letter to the envelope and putting it back in the box with the others, then carefully closing the lid.

She wondered if Bianca had any inkling that the kids had them—she doubted it. Then, for a brief second, she allowed herself to wonder how long it had been since she looked at them herself.

Don’t go there, a voice told her. The same voice that she’d ignored earlier—only this time, she’d listen. She took a deep breath and stood up, wiping her eyes one last time as she shut the closet door.

***

DANNY: Hi Mum, GPS says we’ll be there at noon but traffic’s kinda bad.

COURTNEY: Okay, don’t worry, everything will be ready. XOXO

ADORE: Also…we should probably give you a warning….

COURTNEY: A warning?

DANNY: Mama’s in a bad mood. She’s mad at us.

COURTNEY: Why?? What happened?

ADORE: Well. Fame’s gone.

COURTNEY: Gone?

DANNY: G O N E

COURTNEY: Oh, loves. She’s probably just mad. Not at you.

ADORE: No. She’s mad at us.

Earlier, when Courtney still thought that Fame would be there, she’d obsessed a little too long about what she should wear. She didn’t want to look like she was trying too hard, so anything too revealing or sexy or even too upscale seemed right out. But anything too casual also seemed to be a mistake, because that would imply an inappropriate level of intimacy, wouldn’t it? And then there was the weather to contend with.

She’d finally settled on what seemed like a fairly innocuous and yet put-together ensemble: a blue and white peasant blouse with soft denim shorts—not too short—that were also comfortable enough to wear on the plane, all purchased with Adore on their recent Beverly Hills excursion. It was sweet and innocent, but also stylish enough that nobody could blame her for being lazy around fashion people, especially when paired with Givenchy sandals and some simple silver jewelry.

When the kids informed her that Fame was gone, Courtney did consider changing…but wouldn’t that be even stranger? What should she do, switch out the top for something sexier? What would that accomplish? It was too much of a mind fuck—and besides, the rest of her clothes were already packed anyway. So when she went upstairs to finish getting ready, she just kept on the same damn clothes. She carefully curled her hair, then spent far too much time on her makeup, most of which was blending it out to make it look as if she wasn’t wearing any makeup. She managed to get downstairs to finish the food just in time, barely getting the last of the quesadillas onto the platter before the kids came bursting through the front door.

“MUM!”

“Hello darlings!” Courtney cried, rushing to greet them both, enveloping them into a huge hug. “How was Great Adventure? Did you have fun?”

“Yeah! We missed you though! You would have loved Medusa! It’s so scary and has so many loops! And Nitro! Yeah!”

They chattered away, overlapping, Courtney grinning at their bright-eyed enthusiasm, pulling them both in for another big hug.

“I am sorry that I missed it,” she said, holding them close. “Are you hungry?”

“Starved!”

“Well, good, because I made a huge lunch!”

“Ooh, what did you make?”

“Pepper jack and broccoli quesadillas, refried beans, street corn fritters, mango slaw, grilled zucchini, mini tostada pizzas-” Courtney laughed, watching as Danny took off towards the kitchen so fast, he practically left skid marks on the floor, while Adore’s eyes got bigger and bigger. She pressed another kiss to her daughter’s cheek, then rubbed away the lip gloss with her thumb.

“It sounds so good,” Adore commented. They were still in their mix-and-match ensembles, but at this point, Courtney wasn’t sure how she’d ever doubted her ability to tell them apart for a second—it was painfully obvious.

“Why don’t go you grab a plate and I’ll see if-”

Courtney was cut off by Bianca coming through the front door, arms laden with all of their bags, face a stormcloud of rage.

“No no, please, nobody help with the luggage,” she announced bitterly. “Why would I possibly want help?”

She dropped the bags to the floor and kicked the door closed.

“I was just about to-” Courtney began, but Bianca ignored her, stalking straight past them and thundering up the stairs. She felt Adore’s body tense up beside her.

Danny peeked out timidly from the kitchen, mouth full, saying, “We told you she was mad.”

“Yeah,” Courtney said, rubbing Adore’s back. “Listen, you guys eat, and I’m gonna go…see what’s going on with Mama, okay?”

“She’s gonna bite your head off.”

“Yeah, I know. But we have to leave soon, so…I’ll be fine, don’t look so worried. I’m stronger than you both seem to think, okay?”

Courtney reached out to tickle them, trying to lighten the mood by making them giggle before heading upstairs.

***

Courtney swallowed hard, ignoring the hammering of her heart, and knocked softly on Bianca’s bedroom door.

“Bianca? Can I come in?”

“Do I have a choice?” came the gruff reply.

With one last deep breath, Courtney pushed open the door, and shut it behind her. No reason for the kids to hear them argue. Bianca was laying in bed, one arm flung over her eyes. She was wearing what Courtney had to assume were the clothes she’d slept in—a pair of silk pajama pants and a pale pink camisole. The fact that she’d walked through a hotel like that was the biggest sign of all of her emotional distress.

“Are you okay?” she asked quietly.

“What do you think?”

After a beat, Courtney said, “The kids think you’re mad at them.”

“I am.”

“Did they do something? Last night, things seemed fine-”

“Of course they fucking did!” Bianca snapped, sitting up.

Her eyes were puffy, and without her usual makeup, she looked vulnerable and sad. Courtney’s heart broke a little, seeing her like this. It wasn’t until a second later when she realized that she wasn’t wearing a bra—well, that was going to be distracting. Courtney did her best to avert her eyes, back to Bianca’s furious face.

“They were little assholes,” she continued, “They spent all day trying to wear her down, killing her with kindness. And lord knows, they both learned that shit from you, not me…”

Courtney felt her stomach turn over, knowing that she was the one responsible for the way the kids had acted. But wasn’t that better than them being sullen and bratty? She’d truly been trying to help.

“And-and you know, I know it’s not totally their fault. I’m not crazy. But they didn’t fucking help. So. It’s over. And I’m sure they’re just fucking thrilled. And I…”

She looked away. Courtney took a deep breath, unsure how to feel, or respond. It took her a few seconds.

“Are you sure it’s over?” she finally asked, softly. “I mean, people fight, and it doesn’t always mean-”

“Yeah, I’m sure. She gave me the ring back,” Bianca said, sighing.

“Engagement ring?” Courtney asked, one eyebrow quirking up.

“Yeah…what other kind of ring would I mean?”

“Well…no, just…engagement rings are a bit…heteronormative,” Courtney couldn’t help saying, and off Bianca’s dirty look, added, “Sorry, I just…I meant, um…maybe you can still work it out. You know? And if not, then maybe-”

“Courtney…please don’t take this the wrong way, but you are just about the last person on the planet that I want to talk to about my failed engagement,” Bianca said, voice shaky.

Courtney swallowed. She understood that. If the shoe was on the other foot, she’s sure she would probably feel the same way. But as much as she’d have liked to just leave the room and let Bianca wallow in her misery, they still had a lot to talk about.

“Alright, that’s fair enough…can we just talk about the kids, then?” she asked, trying to keep her tone light, not be too pushy. “We still need to lock down the dates. At least until-”

Bianca heaved out an aggravated, put-upon, dramatic sigh, as if the weight of the world was on her shoulders. Like Courtney was asking her to move mountains instead of simply to look at a schedule on her phone for twenty minutes. Courtney had to strain all the muscles in her face to hold back the eye roll.

“Can’t this wait?” Bianca said, voice thin, really laying on the drama.

“Well…no, not really,” Courtney said apologetically. She empathized with Bianca, truly, but she wasn’t about to break a promise to their kids. They needed to work this out, and doing it in person was going to be infinitely easier for both of them, not to mention making the kids feel secure that they had a plan in place. “We have to leave for the airport in a few hours, and we promised them that we’d plan more visits. It was the one thing we said that we’d-”

Bianca held up a hand to silence her, and Courtney bristled; she’d always hated when she did that. “Yeah, I know. But I’m not in the fucking mood right now.”

“Tough!” she exclaimed, perhaps a bit more vehement than she intended. She took a breath and continued in a more measured, even tone. “We have a problem, and it’s not going away. It’s really the least we can do, after how many years we’ve kept them-”

“Courtney, I’m serious. Back the fuck off.”

“I’m sorry, okay? You’re totally allowed to be upset about your breakup, but-”

“Oh, thanks for the permission,” Bianca said, words dripping with bitter sarcasm. “So generous of you. Any other feelings I’m allowed to have, your highness?”

Courtney closed her eyes. She would not take this bait. She would not allow Bianca to suck her into this fight that she was clearly so desperate to have.

“You know what, fine, we’ll talk later. But we do need to talk, before Danny and I leave. So-”

“Do we really? Why don’t you just send me an email about it like you’ve been doing for the past 8 fucking years?”

This was utterly useless. Why was she even trying? Courtney huffed, finally letting out the eye roll she’d been holding back as she turned on her heel and headed back towards the door. It wasn’t until her hand was on the doorknob that she had second thoughts.

Because, of course, Courtney knew exactly why she was trying.

Bianca was in pain. And even though things between them were strange and awkward and messy, it didn’t change the fact that they’d once loved each other. And all that love didn’t just go away. So to see her in pain, to even know that she was in pain…it wasn’t so simple as just walking away. Courtney removed her hand from the doorknob and turned back towards her, speaking in the gentlest and most empathetic voice she could muster.

“Look…B…I know it sucks, I do, but…if two days with the kids was a dealbreaker for her, then she probably isn’t the right person for you anyway, right? And isn’t it better that you know now?”

“Yeah, it’s just fucking perfect, thanks,” Bianca replied, staring at a spot on the wall, voice flat.

“Well…”

“Can you hear anything?”

“No, not really, just some…No, I don’t think so.”

“Was that Mama? I think she sounds mad. Do you think it’s our fault?”

“I don’t know. I-”

“Shh!”

“Look, I’m just trying to-”

“Maybe I don’t want to look for the silver fucking lining right now, Courtney!” Bianca exploded. “Did that ever occur to you?!”

“I’m not sure why you’re shouting at me,” Courtney said, standing firm. She had empathy, sure, but she wasn’t about to be some doormat, some stand-in for the person Bianca was really mad at. Most of the time, though this whole shitty Divorce Era, her strategy with Bianca was to let her be right, just to keep the peace, mostly out of sheer self-preservation. But even so, she had her limits—times when she needed to push back, even if it made her own life hell. This seemed like one of those times. “This isn’t my fault.”

“Yeah, I’m well aware that nothing to do with my love life is your fault. Or your problem.”

Courtney shook her head, confused. “What’s that supposed to mean?”

“It means that I get it, okay?” Bianca said with a groan. “It’s my problem. Only my problem. No one else gives a shit. That’s painfully clear.”

“That’s not what I meant, B. And by the way, I’m still here, aren’t I? Would I still be in this room, letting you talk to me like this, if I didn’t give a shit?!” She could have walked away—she almost had, but the fact that she didn’t should have told Bianca that she, in fact, did give a shit.

“I dunno, you tell me.” Bianca rolled her eyes again, clearly unimpressed.

“I just meant...did you really think she was the person you’d spent the rest of your life with? Honestly?” Courtney wasn’t sure why she even asked that—because she wasn’t sure she wanted to know the answer. But something about their relationship was just strange, and now that it was over, it felt fair to question it.

Bianca threw up her hands, looking exasperated, angry and exhausted at the same time. “For fuck’s sake, this isn’t abouther!”

“Well then, what’s it about?” Courtney asked, still challenging her.

“I’m not like you, alright?! You choose to be single; you think it’s fun. I just want to find someone...And I try. I try really fucking hard.”

“And what makes you think I don’t?” Courtney asked, incredulous. Yes, sure, she had fun being single. But the idea that she didn’t want a partner…was Bianca out of her mind? Apparently, yes. “What makes you think I haven’t tried?”

“Because!”

Well, that was mature. Debate tactics of a 3 year old. Courtney wasn’t about to let her get away with it though, heartbreak or not.

“Because what, Bianca? Use your words.”

“Because! Who wouldn’t want you?!”

She spat it out with a sneer, like it was an insult, so it took Courtney a few moments to register, staring at her in confusion, heart in her throat. By then, Bianca had collapsed onto the edge of her bed, head in her hands. Courtney walked over slowly and stood in front of her, placing her hands on her shoulders.

“Bianca…”

“What?” she asked, voice small and far away.

“Look at me, please.”

She looked up. Tears were staining her cheeks, her normally bright eyes bloodshot and dull. “I can’t take your fucking pity right now! That’s even worse than-” her voice broke, breath hitching in her throat as tears began streaking down her cheeks.

“B.”

Courtney could barely believe it—was it real? After all this time? Or just some accidental comment, some misunderstanding with the potential to destroy Courtney’s life even worse than last time. She had to know. She took Bianca’s face into her hands, cradling it like she was made of glass. She tilted her chin up and began to brush away the tears with her thumb. The gesture only seemed to make her cry harder, tears falling faster than she could catch them.

“I miss you so much,” Bianca confessed, in a voice so soft it was barely a whisper.

“Me too,” said Courtney, finally believing her, sinking to her knees, her shaky legs no longer able to support her.

She buried her own tear-soaked face in Bianca’s lap, soon feeling Bianca’s hands in her hair, stroking her, her touch the only thing keeping her in the present.

Finally, she looked back up, found Bianca’s dark eyes. They stared at each other for a few long, heated moments. She could feel her pulse quicken, hear the soft tick of the clock in the corner as the seconds dragged on in slow motion. Her thoughts began to race, and whirl, a chaotic flurry in her mind’s eye.

Bianca leaned toward her, but as the flurry turned into a snowball, which then grew in size and speed, Courtney whispered, “Don’t.”

As the snowball grew and grew, turning into an avalanche, Bianca continued leaning towards her. Right before their lips touched, Courtney pushed her away.

“I said no!” It probably came out more forceful than she intended, because Bianca immediately looked flustered and embarrassed.

“Sorry,” she gulped, shaking her head, trying to catch her breath. “I’m sorry, I’m really, I thought you wanted…I’m sorry.”

The idea that Courtney didn’t want her was ridiculous. Courtney burned for her.

“I did. I mean, I do,” Courtney said, a bit flustered herself. She was still on the ground, and lowered herself to a seated position, leaning against the side of the bed. Bianca slid off the bed to sit beside her on the rug, waiting for her to explain. “I do want you. But it’s just...I can’t…”

“Okay.” Bianca’s voice sounded sad. Resigned.

“No. You don’t get it.” Courtney wiped her eyes, drawing her knees up, towards her body, curling in on herself. “I...when you left-”

“You mean when you kicked me out?”

Courtney looked up at her sharply. Of course she remembered the night. She’d re-lived it thousands of times, in waking nightmares—and actual nightmares—over and over, so many times. But kicked her out? That wasn’t how she’d have described the end, when she’d broken down, rasping out a hoarse, ‘If you’re so miserable, why don’t you just fucking leave!’

And Bianca had left…but not before taking Adore, who’d been wailing on the carpet from the second she saw Bianca pick up her purse and put on her shoes. The last thing Bianca said before leaving (the only thing she said before leaving), was that her lawyer would be in touch to work out custody.

Custody.

In her mind, it was already over.

Even so, something inside Courtney didn’t give up. All the next day, the next week, even the next month, she foolishly believed that they could still recover. That they’d had a terrible fight, yes. That they had a lot of work to do. But that they also had a love worth saving. Didn’t they? Bianca hadn’t thought so.

“I…I didn’t kick you out,” Courtney said, shaking her head.

“You did,” Bianca insisted, holding her ground, sitting up straighter, voice losing some of its softness.

“No, I mean I…that’s not what I-” Courtney’s voice broke again, a sob escaping her throat. She covered her mouth, trying to catch her breath, before continuing. “That’s not what I meant. I just…I was angry. I was exhausted. I didn’t want to fight anymore, I couldn’t fight anymore, but…I didn’t mean to leave forever. I didn’t think you would…”

There was a look of horror dawning on Bianca’s face, that maybe she really hadn’t ever considered Courtney’s point of view.

“I figured you’d cool off, and then come back. After a night or even a couple of days. A week, maybe, tops. I didn’t think you’d stay away forever. I didn’t think you’d…I didn’t think you’d really just…just leave.”

“You…told me to leave,” Bianca said.

“Why did you listen?!” Courtney asked, ironic laughter breaking through her tears. “I mean, why pick that night to start, of all nights?”

“I really thought you were done,” Bianca said hoarsely, swallowing.

Courtney looked up at her, lashes still wet, head shaking slightly. “And I thought you’d change your mind about marriage counseling, and-”

“It didn’t seem like an option anymore. Not after-” Bianca’s voice broke.

“And then you took Adore, you just took her, all the way across the country,” Courtney said, fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. “Even though I-”

Courtney stopped abruptly. She didn’t want to get into it, couldn’t put it into words, the absolute heartbreak she’d felt. She’s accepted, by then, that their marriage was over, and that was bad enough, but to then lose her child too—it had been utterly devastating.

“I’m sorry.” Bianca looked down. “But you don’t…you don’t understand how hard it was to be there without you. I just couldn’t stay there, Court. Everything...everything made me think of you. Even the way the air smells in LA, makes me think of you. I had to get out.”

Courtney nodded, sniffling. The whole thing was a nightmare. It should have helped, somehow, to know that Bianca had suffered as much as she had—so why didn’t it? Why did it still hurt, just as much, maybe even more, to know that it could all have been avoided?

“I wish you would have stayed,” Courtney whispered, rubbing her eyes. “I wish we’d…been brave enough to talk about this back then. I wish I’d been braver.”

“Even now, after everything?” Bianca asked softly, studying Courtney’s face.

“I wasn’t the one who was planning to marry someone else,” Courtney reminded her.

Bianca winced and looked down. Courtney almost felt guilty; she would have, if it wasn’t true. She’d been engaged less than 24 hours earlier.

“It wasn’t the kids, you know.” Bianca’s voice was still soft, almost like she was talking to herself.

“What wasn’t the kids?” Courtney asked.

“The reason Fame broke it off. It wasn’t the kids,” Bianca explained, eyes closed, breathing almost labored as she forced out, “She…she said…”

After a few moments, Courtney said, “You don’t have to tell me if you don’t feel-”

“It was the way I looked at you. That’s what she said. When we were talking last night. She could tell that I…” Bianca finally looked back up at Courtney, teeth worrying her bottom lip. “Apparently I have no poker face.”

Courtney wasn’t sure what to say to that. She knew she was probably supposed to feel sorry for her, maybe even guilty, but she couldn't help the tug of a smile at the corner of her mouth. After a moment, Bianca’s brow furrowed, her expression turning into a scowl.

“Oh, whatever, neither do you!”

Courtney laughed, finally, the tears drying on her cheeks as she gazed into Bianca’s eyes. “I never claimed to.”

“I really want to kiss you,” Bianca admitted, arm resting behind her on the bed.

“I do too,” Courtney said, her eyes softening. “But I just worry that-”

“Oh, fuck-”

Courtney smiled, but she was unable to keep the anxiety out of her voice. “-If we open this door, it’s gonna be very hard to close it again.”

“Don’t you think that ship has sailed?” Bianca asked, one eyebrow raised ever so slightly.

“What if things don’t work out, B? I barely got through it last time,” she murmured.

“I’m still not through it,” Bianca said. “So?”

“So…do we really want to risk it?” Courtney asked, wiping her eyes with the back of her fingers.

“Yeah,” Bianca said quickly, a wry smile on her face as her dimples appeared.

Courtney let out a dry laugh as she considered it, genuinely. Bianca did have a point. What did they really have to lose?

Bianca reached out, tucking a lock of Courtney’s hair behind her ear, fingers lingering, making goosebumps prickle on her arms, every hair stand up on the back of her neck. She edged closer, slowly, enough that Courtney could feel the warmth of her skin.

“So…” she breathed, her plush lips softly parted, hesitating when they were just millimeters apart, breath warm, so close Courtney could already taste her.

They stayed that way, barely touching, just breathing each other in and growing dizzier with every second, until Courtney couldn’t resist for another moment. She reached behind Bianca’s head, taking a fistful of her thick hair and pulling her forward, crushing their lips together for a searing kiss, which immediately sent her hurtling off a cliff.

She was right—there was no turning back now. Luckily, she didn’t want to.

#rpdr fanfiction #veronica #masters of the scene #s6 #adore delano #courtney act #bianca del rio #bitney #parent trap au #bitney parent trap #lesbian au #trans character #kid fic #angst #fluff

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