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#maybe later I'll share what scared me
wanderingmind867 · 1 year
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Why do creepy things hide behind a veneer of innocence!?
This is like the the millionth time now that my morbid curiosity has led me to discover something terrifying! You know what I think doesn't help? All these online horror games and stories hide behind children's content. By tying themselves to something innocent and charming, they confuse me into looking it up. And once you look something like that up, I can't escape it! There's a reason I wish every horror writer and creator would drop dead: it's because every single thing terrifies me! And if you're making something scary, make it clear it's a horror story! It shouldn't be that hard!!! Why is this a problem I've consistently had to face since I turned 4!?
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acey-wacey · 2 months
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Jealous of Their Tsum
Feat. Deuce, Azul, Jade
A/n: In honor of tsumderland 2!!! (though it took me the entire event to write it). Kalim, Rook and Lilia in the future if there is demand
♠️ Deuce Space ♠️
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He gets along with his tsum though it's quite the troublemaker sometimes.
It doesn't have the same honor student drive that he does.
Though sometimes it gets into mischief, it's lack of proper inhibitions also make it bolder when it comes to you.
Deuce has had a crush on you for the longest time and never said a word because he was too scared.
His tsum however is not at all scared and has no problem launching into your arms.
You were initially startled by the little plushie that threw itself at you but once you realized it was Deuce's tsum, you giggled and let it bounce up to your shoulders.
It nuzzled the side of your face and you patted it's head affectionately.
Deuce --who had been running after the tsum to keep it from causing too much mayhem -- stopped short when he saw you cuddling with the little creature that looked so much like him.
"You're just a little sweetheart, aren't you?" You cooed at the tsum, squeezing it in your arms and holding it close to your chest.
Deuce couldn't help but feel a pang of jealousy at the affection you showed the tsum.
Why didn't you ever hug him like that? What did Deuce-tsum do to deserve your cuddles?
"You are just so cute," you said as you pinched the tsum's little cheeks. The plushy bounced with happiness. "Almost as cute as the real Deuce!"
Deuce's eyes widened when he heard you.
You thought he was... cute? Cuter than the tsum even?
His jealousy was replaced with swelling pride.
He smiled to himself, knowing you weren't aware of his presence.
Maybe his dreams of confessing weren't so hopeless after all.
...
🐙 Azul Ashengrotto 🐙
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His tsum had mostly been helping out at the Mostro Lounge, being cute and attracting customers.
Azul knew how good the adorable little plush was for business but he never expected to see you drawn to the crowds.
"What brings you to the Lounge on this fine day, dearest prefect?" Azul asked you with his signature charming smile.
"Everyone's been talking about the tsum that's working. He's just so cute!" you responded enthusiastically, looking to where Azul-tsum was filling up a customer's water glass.
Azul's perfect smile faltered for just a second, not long enough for you to notice.
"So even you can be tempted by our most adorable new staff member?"
"Seems so," you shrugged with a smile.
"I'll ensure it is sent to your table then," Azul smiled before turning away.
He secretly scowled at the tsum before walking back to his post.
He didn't hear you mutter "I can think of a more adorable staff member" before he left.
A few minutes later, there was a bit of a commotion in the dining area.
"What's going on?" Azul asked Jade when he saw the franticness buzzing around your table.
"It appears the tsum has attacked a patron," Jade said, though his smile was much too sly for that kind of news.
Azul was much too startled to notice the eel's ulterior motives.
He pushed his way through the crowd to find your table.
"I am terribly sorry about any violent behavior by our resident tsum. If anyone has been attacked in any way, I assure you, you will be reimbursed..."
You interrupted Azul before he could finish.
"Nonsense! I wasn't attacked so much as glomped by this little cutie!"
Azul couldn't tell if he was more startled by the attack accusations or the fact that his tsum was nuzzling itself into your chest. And you were cuddling it back?
Azul found himself becoming increasingly worried that his tsum shared the same feelings he had for you.
What if you discovered that he liked you because of his tsum? You would probably hate him and then he'd never see you again and all because of that stupid ball of stuffing!
First it was going to steal his job, then his crush. Sooner or later, Jade and Floyd would completely replace him with the thing!
Azul collected himself enough to take a deep breath and offer you a hand.
"My deepest apologies for this unprofessionalism. May I offer you a VIP seat while I get everything sorted with our clingy little waiter?"
You smiled and took Azul's hand holding the tsum against your shoulder with the other.
"I'm really not bothered but I'll never say no to a better seat."
While Azul walked you to your new booth, he put on a customer service smile just for you.
"Say, Y/N, you seem to enjoy cuddling with the little tsum quite a bit."
"Can't deny that," you chuckled and squeezed the puffball tighter. It wiggles its stubby arms with joy. "I've grown fond of the little fellow."
Azul's eyes narrowed slyly.
"I have a proposition for you, Y/N. You may cuddle my tsum as much as you like, with a few conditions of course."
"Of course," you repeated with a roll of your eyes.
"I don't even ask much of you," Azul continued as he summoned a contract with his magic. "Just sign on the dotted line and the tsum is practically yours."
You narrowed your eyes at the fine print before chuckling.
"For every cuddle Azul-tsum receives, twice as many must be returned to the original Azul," you read aloud with a smirk on your face.
"A tempting offer, is it not, prefect?"
You smiled and set the tsum down on a nearby table much to its dismay.
Before Azul could react, you wrapped your arms around his neck and pulled him into a tight embrace.
"Very tempting indeed."
🍄 Jade Leech 🍄
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You were walking peacefully back to Ramshackle from your afternoon classes when you tripped over something soft in the road.
You spit the dirt out of your mouth and looked up to see a mini Jade hopping around on the road.
You sighed and stood up, dusting off your uniform.
"You did that on purpose, didn't you, you little schemer?"
The tsum stopped its gleeful hopping to wink at you.
You laughed and squatted down to be roughly eye level with the plush.
"Well don't think you can indebt me to you. I'm a lot bigger than you after all," you said before realizing the irony. "Huh, that's funny, it's usually the other way around with Jade."
You continued on your way home but noticed the tsum still bouncing after you.
"What? Did Jade send you to collect a payment?"
The tsum shook its head, or at least it would have if it had a head. More like it just shook its whole body.
"Do you need something?"
Another shake.
"Are you gonna follow me all the way home?"
An enthusiastic nod.
"Just like the normal Jade. Can never take no for an answer."
You sighed and held out your hands to the tsum.
"Come on, let's get going. I can't have you tracking dirty stub prints all over my shiny nice desecrated wood floors."
The Jade-tsum hopped eagerly into your hands.
Before too long, it started to rain.
You groaned and looked at the little tsum in your hands.
"Guess we gotta make a run for it, eh, Jade-tsum?"
The tsum bounced in excitement.
You held it close to your chest and made a break down the dirt road to your dorm.
By the time you made it back, the tsum was stuck to you like glue.
"Come on, little Jade, I'm all wet and muddy, I need to take a shower!"
The tsum stayed stuck to your shirt no matter how much you tugged at it.
"Guess this is my life now."
After your fourth lap around the dorm, trying to dry off with a plushie attached to you, you got a phone call from the Jade's cell.
"Y/N," you answered tiredly.
"How fortuitous I was able to reach you, prefect," you heard Jade's easily distinguishable voice from the other line. "Would you have happened to see my little lookalike anywhere? I'm afraid it's gotten away from me and it's much too difficult to search in the rain."
"Yeah, actually. It's kind of attached to me."
"Attached, you say?" Jade's voice perked up with interest. "Whatever do you mean?"
"I mean literally attached. It latched onto me like Velcro and I can't get it off for the life of me which is quite inconvenient."
You heard Jade chuckle.
"That does sound quite characteristic for a version of me," he mused, making you wonder what the implications of that statement were. "I shall be right over to remove it."
About 20 seconds after he hung up, you heard a knock on your door.
"That was quick," you said as you got up to open the door.
Jade was standing in your doorway, soaking wet with a sneaky smile on his lips.
"How did you get here so fast?"
"Oh, I was already on the way."
You laughed as you stepped aside to let Jade in the door. As per his usual polite self, he took off his muddy shoes before following you to the dying room (it's in such poor shape you don't bother calling it a living room).
"Why'd you call ahead if you were already coming?"
"It is polite to give warning of one's arrival, is it not?" Jade cocked his head in fake innocence. "I would never wish to be unexpected."
"Jade Leech, you are always unexpected."
He smiled at you rebuff.
"I shall take that as a compliment," he cleared his throat and turned to you. "Now for the matter of our other unexpected guest."
Jade looked at his tsum double who was still firmly snuggled into your chest.
He bent down to look the tsum in the eye and you didn't quite hear what he said to it but from the way it released it's hold on you and scampered off to the couch, you assumed it was a threat.
"Thanks, Jade," you said exasperatedly though you knew there was going to be a catch later.
"I accept your thanks, prefect, but your payment would be much more appreciated."
You sighed and grabbed your wallet from your pocket.
"If you're going to make me work shifts at the Mostro, I would much rather pay you in cold hard madol."
Jade pushed your hands down and looked at you with a dangerous glimmer in his eyes.
"I'm afraid your little leech has not been removed, prefect, only replaced with a larger one."
You backed up as Jade approached you with a sharp toothy grin. Eventually, he backed you up against the couch and you fell over backwards.
"Poor helpless prefect," Jade tutted, looming over you, his dark silhouette outline by the flickering light of your ancient chandelier. "Who would be able to help you if a slimy eel decided to... latch on?"
Your breath caught in your throat as the wind was knocked out of you by a crushing weight on your body.
You waited for Jade to keep squeezing the life out of you but for some reason it never came.
Instead you felt the nuzzle of a much larger head into your neck.
Once you recovered from the shock, you smiled and began stroking Jade's hair.
He growled under your touch.
"Mine."
...
☕Buy Me A Ko-Fi! ☕
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lovelybrooke · 5 months
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Second-year's reaction to reader wanting to leave.
I'm sorry for taking so long, haven't really been feeling super creative lately. Anyway, here's the second part of this. This will focus on the second years, and I'll make another post for the third years later.
Riddle:
Riddle hears about you leaving through the whisperings of Ace and Deuce. They're distressed, that much is obvious, but it's what they're speaking about that makes Riddle so confused. You want to leave? A part of him wonders if it's because of him, that maybe his overblot made you scared of him. That can't be though, since you don't seem scared when speaking to him, you're happy. You have to be happy.
Riddle overthinks everything, he goes through every possible reason you'd want to leave and weighs the possibility of it being true in his head. For a while, he doesn't confront you. Instead, he goes to Trey. He talks his friend's ear off on why'd you possibly wanted to leave. He doesn't even ask you if it's true until much, much later. When he does, it's almost as if he's deranged, begging you to never leave him. You're his dearest friend, he can't handle it if you leave. It's a side of Riddle few see, but he doesn't care. Anything, as long as you stay with him.
Ruggie
Ruggie, very much in nature, believes it's all just a joke. Like Riddle, he hears about it from Jack, however, Jack just straight up tells him and Leona, rather than whispering about it in secret. Ruggie full on laughs, because in his mind, even if you wanted to leave you couldn't. At this point, it's no secret that Crowley isn't doing much to get you sent back to your world. Whether that's intentional or not he doesn't know. What he does know is he shouldn't waste time worrying about you leaving when it isn't possible.
It isn't until Jack tells him about the mirror that he starts to worry. Your ticket home is right in that stupid run down dorm of yours, and there's nothing he can do about it. He starts to plan ways to get you to stay, some of which are more dubious than others. In honest, Ruggie doesn't care that you want to leave, nor does he care for the reason. He knows what everyone else is thinking, he knows they all want you to stay, so this isn't wrong. What's wrong is you conspiring behind their backs to leave a place that's been so generous to you.
Ruggie puts up a blind front when around he. He doesn't want to set you off that he's planning something. To you, he doesn't know you're planning on leaving, and he plans to keep in that way.
Azul (fun fact: do you know me and Azul share a birthday!)
Azul and the rest of Octavinelle don't learn about you wanting to leave until much later, since there aren't any freshman you're close with. However, this doesn't mean that they're in the dark for long. Azul has the twins watching over you whenever possible, in when he learns you want to leave, he's sent into a panic. He's like Riddle where he starts to think up every possibility for why'd you'd want to leave. He blames himself a lot more however, believing he and his sneaky nature is the reason you'd want to leave. He forces the twins to watch over you much more now, to figure out how'd you possibly leave, and to stop it by any means necessary.
On the outside, Azul is very composed to everyone. However, when he's alone, he's a mess. He's constantly crying whenever he's in his room, seeking your comfort even though he knows he can't have it. He can't possibly let you leave, he can't, he can't, he can't.
It gets to a point where he even starts writing up contracts, promising you wondrous things if only you stay. He never gets the courage to offer them to you though, in fear that it will only drive you further away from him though. However, if you were to, for whatever reason, find one of his famous contracts tucked away in your bag or on your desk somehow, don't worry about how it found its way to you.
Jade and Floyd
Jade doesn't believe leaving is a possibility for you. It doesn't matter if it's possible or not, he knows there are more than enough people on this campus who would prevent that from happening. So when he overhears you and the first years talk about leaving, he isn't worried. This is in stark contrast to his brother, who tries to jump the table when he hears the news. Jade needs his brother to compose himself, he can't let you realize they know. Quickly, the both go and make their housewarden aware of the news.
Floyd, like mentioned, is the opposite. He now hates you. How dare you want to leave? He thought you knew you weren't allowed to go anywhere he couldn't follow. You're being a bad friend, y'know, and he really doesn't like that. Floyd starts to get super annoyed with you, suddenly avoiding you. When you ask Jade about it, he says it's just one of his moods.
The twins both agree that you aren't leaving, even though they both have very different approaches to you staying with them. Jade want's to be discreet about everything, while Floyd wants to lock you away so that leaving isn't an option. Since they both have opposing ideas on how to handle everything, they both just handle keeping a watch on you. They needed to make sure you didn't go too far and do anything stupid.
Jamil
Jamil considers you one of his first real friends. Even though he was so very mean to you, you were always kind to him. You treated him like a normal person, and not just an offshoot of Kamil. He's very grateful for that. So when he hears you're planning on leaving, he decides to do the best thing and confront you directly. He actually asks you why you want to leave, what would be achieved by you going home. He geniunily tries to understand you, because he knows that if it really came to it, he could always just use his unique magic on you. He wouldn't want to, but it's a possibility.
Ultimately, he keeps you leaving to himself, at least for as long as he can. in case he's able to something. Jamil is smart, and he knows that he can use this information to his advantage. He won't manipulate you in a direct way like some others, instead he tries to remind you in subtle ways what you're leaving behind. You came to this world and put together again these broken boys, and now you think you can just walk away without even a big of a fight. He can't let that happen.
He'll remind you how easy it is for overbolts to happen, especially at this school. What would happen if you weren't there to remedy it? Surely you wouldn't leave all these people you care so much about just for some boring world you can barely remember, would you?
Kalim
Like I mentioned, Jamil doesn't tell anyone, even Kalim about your desire to leave. So, Kalim has to find out on his own. In honesty, Kalim probably finds out last, since he really doesn't notice a change in your behavior. It isn't until all the other housewardens are talking about your departure that he realizes how different you've been acting, and suddenly he feels like an idiot. How dare he not notice the state you've been, he feels like a terrible friend.
In a desperate state to make you change your mind, he starts gifting you more and more. He's always been generous, but now it's bordering on madness. He'll give you matching jewelry, stones and jewels with deep meanings, brackets that when he puts on you, are near impossible to take off.
A part of him wonders if it's too late, if you're already headset on leaving and that nothing he does will change it. He feels so stupid, and it gets to a point where he's left in a extreme depression. It takes much coaxing from Jamil to get him out of bed and to class, and even then he looks like a zombie. If anything, this state convinces you to stay more than his fancy gifts. Don't let him realize this though, because he will abuse it.
Silver
Silver doesn't know you as well, only having a faint idea of what you could be like through Malleus. So he didn't really care that much when he found out you were planning on leaving. He found it strange that Sebek cared so much, but he quickly realized why it mattered when he and Sebek were tasked with giving Malleus the unfortunate news.
He's never seen him so angry, so distraught, so sad. It was strange, watching as Lilia tries to convince him that it was impossible and that it would never happen, but even his father wasn't convinced with his on words. Silver starts to wonder how you have such a hold on Malleus, even if you were his first true friend. It sends him on a path of reflection, longing to have a real conversation with you, maybe even change your mind.
When he does, he understands. You're captivating, invigorating, something that makes Silver feel so warm and alive. He wonders if his master feels the same way, is that strange? He talks with you for days on end before he realizes that he forgot about convincing you not to leave. It isn't until you bring it up that he feels his stomach sink, and he starts to worry.
Silver is honest with you, he tells you what Malleus would do if you left. He makes sure you know the outcome of your decision, while never making you feel like you don't really have a choice. He wants you to stay, he really does, but he knows that he won't be the one to convince you to do so.
If you do plan on leaving though, he hopes you do so before Malleus gets to you.
---
A/n: sorry for the wait. I go on break on the 19th so I'll start working on the third years then.
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moonydustx · 2 months
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Good Medicine
Trafalgar Law x F!Reader
warnings: F!reader is sick, Law has some problems taking action to take care of her. Pre-established relationship, mentions of disgusting things about being sick (basically vomiting) , fluff
a/n: maybe I'll rewrite this better later, I just needed to get it out there to see if it sparked my creativity.
requests open | one piece masterlist
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Today was one of those days where you woke up already knowing something was wrong, your only mission was to find out what. The plate in front of you looked strange that morning. The same coffee, the same bread, everything seemed wrong. The same went for your body, it seemed to weigh tons and your stomach was boiling with something that went beyond the hot drink in front of you.
"Are you okay?" Shachi snapped you out of your reverie, watching you roll a piece of the sandwich from one side to the other.
"I just need to get some air." You stood up, not having the trouble to even take your plate off the table.
With hurried steps, you reached the bathroom with just enough time to open the toilet seat before all your breakfast went away. You just hoped that like a good hangover, emptying it would be enough to improve but apparently you were wrong.
You had recently left the last island you had visited, which meant more things to keep: more work for you. In those days, you knew that rest would be scarce, as would the times you would meet your captain - who also served as your boyfriend in his spare time. Chills ran through your body as you struggled to stack two boxes of medical supplies, your body seemed to sweat more than usual. You heard your name being called in the distance, needing to focus a few times before you saw Law approaching.
"Are you ok?" He analyzed you from top to bottom. Pale lips, deep dark circles, something was wrong.
"Yes captain." you replied, respecting your treaty for when you were in public. "Just some heartburn."
"Keep an eye on it. You know where to find the medicine." he simply responded, analyzing you once more before leaving.
You finished putting away the boxes and leaned against the wall, trying to regain the air and strength lost in the whole process. Following the quick orders your captain had given, you swallowed some pills and continued with your tasks, even though your body seemed to fight against every movement.
You loved Law and you knew he loved you too, but sometimes it was a little difficult to deal with how methodical he could be especially when it came to being sick. On days like these, he tended to be more of a doctor than a boyfriend and you hated that. Ignoring the thoughts, you made your way to your shared room, reaching the bed and seeing Ikkaku hanging from the top.
"What ghost scared you?"
"What you mean?" you threw yourself against the pillows, using the blanket.
"You're pale, you look like you're going to disappear." She came down, standing in front of you and placing her hand on your forehead. "And you're burning up with a fever."
"I've already taken my medicine." you covered your head, trying to escape the cold that only you felt. "I just need to get some sleep."
"Did you eat anything bad?" She pulled your blanket back. "Or are you pregnant?"
"I'm betting more on the first hypothesis." you immediately reassured her, knowing that for the other proposal, you and Law were always responsible in terms of protecting each other. "I think it's just a virus."
"Did you warn Law?"
"He asked me to..." you sat down, to continue talking, but again your stomach turned.
Without responding, you ran once again towards the bathroom, this time Ikkaku's hurried footsteps followed you.
"Open the door." she asked and even though she didn't see it, you shook your head. A few minutes passed before it knocked again.
"I am worried." she warned. "Open the door or I'll have to call him here."
"It is not necessary." you reached up, unlocking the lock. "I'm just a little dizzy."
"Let me help you." Ikkaku pulled you, supporting your body as you washed your face. "Are you sure the medicine alone is enough?"
"Yes." you replied with clear discouragement in your voice.
"I'm going back to my room, maybe getting some sleep will help me."
Walking a few meters from the bathroom, the two of you came face to face with Law followed by Bepo, both discussing something about the likely next island they would find.
"Are you feeling ok?" Bepo was the first to ask and you just nodded. Law's gaze burned over you again, analyzing every inch of your body.
He knew there was something wrong, but he didn't know how far he wanted to intervene, for fear that you would feel uncomfortable.
"Do you need any help?" he asked in your direction, waiting for you to say yes.
"It's okay captain." you replied before Ikkaku spoke for you, giving what was your best smile for the moment.
he two of you walked away from him and it didn't take long for you to reach the bedroom. Ikkaku helped you get to the bed and watched you cover yourself up to your head. Being one of the only two people who knew about your relationship with the captain, she sat at the foot of the bed, watching you.
"Are you sure you don't want to ask him for help?"
"He's going to medicate me, probably tell me to eat and rest. I've already done almost all of that." you answered. "I don't want to be a problem for him, I know it's not in his profile to take care of someone like that, in a more intimate way."
"But it's what you need right now." she replied, walking away. "Get some rest, I'll ask them to prepare something light for you to eat."
The lights went out and you remained there in a light doze bothered by the fever. Ikkaku followed with firm steps, finding the captain heading towards his room, approaching him halfway and pretending to be angry.
"Captain, I need to talk to you."
She tried to appear more imposing in order to advocate for her friend, but she knew that would be a bit difficult when the person you want to impose yourself on is your captain. Law just gave her space to enter the room, closing the door for her.
"What happened?"
"Are you really going to let your girlfriend walk around dying?" she crossed her arms, indignant.
"She said it was just heartburn."
"That was her talking to her doctor. With her boyfriend she would definitely ask for help. Can I give some unsolicited advice captain?" Ikkaku leaned on the table, taking the opportunity to look around.
"I guess I have no choice, right?"
"She's burning up with a fever in her room, she vomited her guts out and can't stand up." with each new symptom, Law was the one who seemed to get paler and more worried. "Take care of her a little. A little affection is also good medicine."
"Right..." he seemed to analyze, waiting for more answers from the woman in front of him.
"I'll ask them to prepare some soup for her and leave it in her room, okay?"
"Could it be." Law turned his back to Ikkaku, ready to leave. "Thank you. This time I won't throw you into the sea out of insolence." he joked, earning a few laughs from the woman.
Law knew something was wrong, now he needed to find out why you didn't ask for his help. He walked quickly and felt his heart shatter when he found you curled up and shaking under the blanket.
"Just let me sleep Ikkaku, I don't know if I can eat right now." your dejected voice murmured, squeezing Law's heart even more.
Now it was all so clear, so obvious that part of the doctor felt ashamed for not having noticed it before. You were so careful with anyone who even cut a piece of their finger, it was obvious you wanted the same treatment.
"Hey, sorry it took me so long." he whispered. You opened your eyes and found Law bent down on your bed, his fingers were removing the strands stuck to your face by sweat. "I'm going to do a quick scan on you."
He warned and then used the sword he carried, analyzing every millimeter of your body. It seemed to be a virus and a resistant one. That would explain the fever and the tremors.
"Let me take proper care of you."
"No." you murmured, feeling his arms go around your legs and back, picking you up. "I already took medicine."
"I know."
"And I don't want to be tied up in an IV." you tried to pull away from him, feeling your stomach drop at the movement.
"I'm not going to medicate you." the blue dome appeared around the two of you.
"And I think I need to throw up."
At the last second, Law changed your fate, taking you to the bathroom. As soon as the gray walls of your room turned into the walls of the bathroom, you reached the floor again, leaning over the toilet and despite the immense urge your body didn't seem to have any more bile to be expelled. It took him a few seconds to follow you, but soon his hands found your hair, holding it with one hand while the other passed your forehead.
"Law." you called and flinched, pressing your own body against yourself. "It hurts."
"I'm so sorry sweetheart." he placed his hand on top of yours, which was pressed against your stomach. "You still have a fever and haven't eaten anything, we need energy for your body." he confirmed, gently lifting you off the ground. "Come on, I'll give you a bath.
"I'm disgusting."
"That's the point." Law spoke and saw you laugh, albeit lightly, which was already a relief for him. "I'm just kidding. Let's try to get this fever down."
Knowing that you didn't have enough strength to even talk, Law guided you to the shower, taking off your clothes while you leaned on him. As soon as the cold water came into contact with your body, you tried to escape and were immediately held by your boyfriend.
"Law!"
"Just a little, I know it's pretty cold." he allowed you to hug him even more and consequently get him wet in the process. "I promise, just a few minutes and I'll take you back to our room."
"If I survive until then."
"Do not say that." He scolded you, even though he knew that your way of dealing with problems was always sarcastic - sometimes even too much.
Law slowly turned off the shower. The first breeze that hit your damp skin made you cling against him and whimper, Law's usually colder skin this time was a warm pleasure to your body.
You felt a drastic difference in the environment and broke away from the man, seeing that you were in his room. Law guided you to sit on the bed and pulled a small blanket over your shoulders while he looked for some clothes for you to wear. Taking advantage of the comfort, you lay down and watched him walk from one side to the other.
"Can you sit down?" He knelt in front of you, using a small towel to dry your still damp skin.
Leaning on his shoulders, you sat on the bed and for a few minutes, you felt like a delicate, small doll. Using the extra strength he had that you lacked, Law dressed your body piece by piece, like a delicate puzzle. Even with the simple touch of your hand on your shoulder, Law could feel you tremble, probably due to the weakness that the virus brought to you.
A few minutes later, you were dressed. A pair of baggy black sweatpants and a blouse of the same size. Surprising you by showing that he had more pieces than the hat adorned with black circles, Law placed a black cap on your head, adjusting your ears so that they were also warm in the fabric.
"Unfortunately, we can't use that." he pushed away the blanket you were about to use. "If you cover yourself up and get hotter than that, it will only make your fever worse."
Avoiding your grumble, Law sat with his coat against the wall and pulled you to sit against his chest. Watching you curl up against his body, Law picked up the small bowl on the table next to him that Ikkaku had probably left as they agreed.
"I do not want it." you tried to move it away with your hand, having used your strength in vain as Law didn't move an inch. "I just want to sleep, just a little."
"Just a few spoonfuls and I'll let you sleep. It's that or more medicine." He warned, seeing you pout at the time. "Come on, I'll help you."
"Sorry to bring you into this."
"You don't need to say sorry." Law wished he could get rid of that virus right away when he saw you grunting in pain when you swallowed the first spoonful of food. "I should have noticed sooner, I know I can be more distant sometimes, but I need you to make it clear when you need me in moments like this."
"But what about the others, if they suspect something?" you accepted the other spoonful of food, the discomfort this time was smaller but still present.
"It's okay as long as you're okay."
Supporting the bowl of soup in one hand and the spoon in the other, Law convinced you to eat just five more spoonfuls, the last one being enough for him to see you push the bowl away and writhe in pain again. Law placed the bowl in the same room he was in before and saw you cling to his body, your eyes already heavy.
"Law you're going to get sick." you mumbled, already practically giving in to sleep.
"Don't worry about that." the last thing you felt was his lips on your forehead. "And if I stay, it will be worth staying with you."
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thebearer · 9 months
Text
baby blues |carmen berzatto x reader|
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prompt: two blue lines change all your plans, and carmen doesn't take it well. or how you tell carmen you're pregnant.
read the entire dad!carmen berzatto masterlist here!
contains: language, pregnancy, angst, carmen's an asshole, alludes to past parent trauma, hurt/comfort.
"Shit."
The hiss of your tone bounced off the green tiles of your bathroom, an eerie echo that rang dully through your mind. A reminder that this was all too real, happening right now in front of you- to you.
After weeks of what you thought was a stomach bug- retching at almost anything, exhaustion, aches- you had come to realize it might not just be a virus when you looked at the unopened box of tampons under the sink.
You were late.
A frantic trip to Walgreens, an hour of avoidance out of pure fear, three glasses of water, and two tests later; you were here. Looking at the two mocking blue lines on both tests. You were pregnant.
You called your best friend, Alicia, unsure of who else to confide in. Scared, emotional, overwhelmed, you sobbed into the phone, hand holding your head on the edge of the bed. "Carmen is gonna lose his shit."
"Carmen is not gonna lose his shit." Alicia soothed over your heaving gasps. "He will be fine. You both will be fine. You're married. What's the issue?"
You shook your head, swiping your thumb under your eyes. "You don't... Carmen and I haven't, like, ever really talked about kids." You muttered. It was mostly true. You hadn't really, other than euphoric pillow talk ramblings where you both were just bubbly with love, spilling shared wishes under sheets.
"I thought you said you wanted kids?"
"Yeah, but not now." You sobbed into the phone. "I don't... I don't think I'm ready to be a mom. I'm not gonna be good at that. I don't-I don't know anything about kids! And-And I can barely cook, and- Alicia, I couldn't keep our cactus alive! I killed our fucking cactus, and you think I'm ready for a kid?"
Alicia laughed lightly on the other end. "Ok, true, but you won't kill your kid. You'll be much more attached to it than the cactus." She countered easily, calmly. "And you'll be a good mom, babe. I know you'll be. And Carmen knows too. You know he does. Call your OBGYN and get an appointment. Make sure this is legit and get your vitamins and let me know what you need from me."
Two days later, you were laid on the cool paper at the doctor's office, eyes wide watching her drag the wand over your tummy. Seven weeks. The ultrasound clutched in your hand had an arrow where the baby was, it was still so small. A blip, a splotch right on your plans.
You decided to tell Carmen that night. He knew something was off with you, starting to get more and more suspicious. It was only a matter of time.
"Hey, baby." You grinned as excited as you could when he came home.
"Hey," Carmen chirped, grinning back at you when you kissed him sweetly, a little longer than usual, not that he minded. "How are you doin', baby? Good day?"
"Yeah, it was." You quipped, throat tightening, desperately trying to keep your voice from cracking. "I, uh, I have a surprise for you."
"A surprise?" Carmen's brows lifted, dropping his bag by the door. "What kinda surprise, huh? Somethin' under this?" He teased, hand sliding up your shorts, palming at your ass and making you squirm.
You couldn't help the fleeting thought that he wouldn't be able to do that for long. Not when a baby was in the house. Your throat burned with tears at the thought.
"No." You shook your head. "Just... Here, sit right here for me and I'll be right back." You kissed his cheek sweetly, running to the spare bedroom for the ultrasound. You wondered if this would be the baby's nursery. Or maybe upstairs in the makeshift workout room Carmen used. It felt odd planning this type of thing, thinking about this.
Your hands were sweaty, trying not to wrinkle the printed photo. It was your first after all. The first picture of many. Ones you secretly hoped would line the walls of your house. Pictures of the baby, with you and Carmen.
You hoped Carmen would be in them.
That horrid thought always made it's way back into your mind, rattling you to your core.
"Close your eyes." You tried to sing-song, playful and light like you usually would. The kind of tone that was silly, left Carmen grinning and doing what you said. Instead, it sounded tired.
Carmen still covered his eyes anyways. You took a soft breath, placing the photo in front of him. "Ok, y-you can open." You whispered.
Carmen's brow lifted, looking at you carefully before down at the table. He stilled, face unmoving, body halted, eyes zoned in on the ultrasound.
"Wh-What-What is this?" Carmen's tone was hushed, tight, like his chest felt. He was sure this wasn't what he thought it was. It couldn't be.
"I, um, you know I-I've been feeling not great." You started, wringing your hands in front of him. "And I... I haven't had my period in a while, so I went to the store and... and I got a test, and it was..." You motioned down to the ultrasound. "I'm pregnant, Carmen."
The house was still. That same eerie stillness creeping back in, looming over both of you in such a sickening way, it had your stomach twisting.
Carmen blinked, shaky hands picking up the ultrasound, refusing to look at you. "Oh."
"Oh?" You repeated. "Carmen, I-I said I'm pregnant."
"No, no, I, uh, yeah, I-I heard you." Carmen nodded, leg bouncing under the table. "I just... I thought you were on birth control."
"Carmen, what?" You snapped. "I am."
"Then-Then how the fuck-"
"-Oh, don't you fuckin' dare, Berzatto." You hissed, rolling your eyes at him, snatching the ultrasound off the table.
"I'm not fuckin' blaming you, but-but how?" Carmen could feel his heart rate rising, ears ringing and head spinning with that old, familiar feeling of a panic attack coming on.
"How?" You gawked at him. "Carmen, it's not, like, a one-hundred percent guarantee, and-and... Come on, Carmen, we've been fucking a lot lately."
"I don't..." Carmen stopped himself, his hand rubbing over his eyes. Your heart skipped, chest aching with fear when you looked at him. Carmen pushed his chair out, standing and pacing around the kitchen, hands on his hips, lips in a thin line. "I-I need to think. Fuck, I need to think, just-just..."
You tracked him, your own heart hammering loud in your ears. Carmen snatched his cigarettes, hands shaking when he turned them over in his hands slowly. You could practically hear his thoughts, when the baby is here, he can't smoke anymore.
"I need a fuckin' second, ok? I need to fuckin' think!" Carmen boomed, voice thundering off the walls, making you jump. Carmen snatched his lighter and Spirits, stomping out the front door, the slam of the door the last thing you heard before the house settled and stilled again. Your worst possible scenario played out in front of you, becoming a reality too.
You were alone.
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"Cousin, can I ask you, what the fuck your fuckin' problem is?" Richie grit, sliding beside Carmen. "The fuck are you being such a jagoff about, right now?"
"I'm being a jagoff?" Carmen snapped, slamming the knife down. His eyes were wild, hair even wilder. Curls matted and sticking out like they did when Carmen was stressed, when he'd ran his hands through them too much.
"Yeah, you're bein' a fuckin' jagoff." Richie countered, voice raising over Carmen's. "You look like shit, you smell like shit, and you're treatin' everyone here like fuckin' shit. So what's the fuckin' issue?"
"Fuck you, Richie, alright? Fuck you. Get the fuck outta my fuckin' face!" Carmen roared, the vein in his neck protruding when he did, sending the few chefs still in the kitchen retreating before they were screamed at next.
"Y'know why don't you just fuckin' calm down? Makin' everyone here fuckin' miserable with your bad attitude. No wonder-" Richie stopped, eyes flicking down to Carmen. His shoulders dropped, sighing heavy at his own revelation. "What'd you do?"
"What? What did I... Fuck off, I'm not in the-"
"-Nah, Cousin. What did you do?" Richie shook his head. "Why's she not here today, huh?"
"I'm right here." Natalie muttered, turning the corner, balancing two cups and a large work bag. "I had to take Chelle to Pete's office so he can take her to dance, and traffic was..." Natalie laughed cynically, shaking her head.
Carmen felt his stomach twist, jaw tightening. That would be you two before you knew it. All over the place, late to shit because of the kid. Just like Sugar and fucking Pete. That made him Pete.
"Not you, but I'm glad to see you. How are you?" Richie muttered, pressing a chaste kiss to Sugar's cheek. "Carmen fucked up."
"I did not-"
"-You fucked up? On what, bear?" Natalie blinked, frowning lightly. "Oh, before I forget, where's my favorite sister in law? I have her-" Richie gave her a pointed look. Sugar stopped, face falling in realization. "Oh, that's... Carm, what did you do?"
"Can you two just fuck off? Fuck!" Carmen roared, kicking a pot under the table.
"Wow, anger issues much?" Sugar rolled her eyes at his dramatics. "Is this what you did? Is that why she isn't here?"
"No, Natalie, you're pissin' me the fuck off-"
"Alright!" Richie clapped his hands, cutting them both off. "Family meeting. Ok? Meeting time. Right now."
"I don't have time-" Carmen started, Richie just clapping his hands on his shoulders, shoving him away from the table.
"Natalie, family meeting." Richie waved her in.
"Family meeting?" Fak turned the corner, eyes lit up hopefully.
"Not with you, you fuckin'..." Richie huffed, shaking his head. "Me, Nat, and Carm are having a meeting. Do your jobs, ok? Don't bother us, just... handle it, alright? Thank you. Every second counts and all that bullshit." Richie nodded towards the staff, shutting Carmen's office door behind him.
"Carm, you... Are you ok?" Natalie winced, looking at her younger brother.
Carmen ran his hands over his eyes, slumped in his desk chair, knees bouncing nervously. His breaths labored and ragged in his hands. Richie's eyes cut to Natalie's.
"Cousin," Richie's voice was softer this time. "What is goin' on?"
Carmen took a shaky breath in, Richie stilling at the sound of his emotions. "You... You were right. I fucked up." Carmen muttered. "I fucked up. I fucked up so bad." Carmen's voice was tight, thick with tears he was trying to choke back.
Natalie stepped forward slowly. "Carmen, what did you do?" She said as calmly as she could. "Just-Just tell us, and we'll... we'll try and help you."
"Did you cheat on her?" Richie asked, brows furrowed in disgust.
"No, what? Why the... No, no, no, I-I..." Carmen leaned back in the chair, hands knotted in his hair. "She's pregnant."
Richie and Natalie paused, both sighing slightly in relief. "Oh my God, that's great!"
"Yeah, I mean, Cousin, I thought you... I'm glad you didn't, but that's great!"
"Aw, is that why she's been sick? Poor thing. I knew it! You know Pete said that, and I-" Natalie started, Carmen's sudden jerk of his body, sitting in the chair with frantic eyes stopped her.
"I don't know!" Carmen blurted, shaking his head, refusing to look at them. At their furrowed brows of concern. He couldn't face them. Tell them what he'd done.
"You don't know?" Sugar frowned in confusion. "You don't know if she's pregnant?"
"I-I..." Carmen felt his chest tightening, burning with that familiar ache. He tried to breathe in, slow and long, counting back from ten like his therapist told him, but his chest still ached. "I left."
The room filled with that same eerie silence, the one that seemed to be following him around lately. The one that crept into the room when you showed him the ultrasound, the same one that followed him into the restaurant last night.
"You left?"
"You fuckin' what?"
Natalie and Richie gawked, eyes wide and frantic, looking down at Carmen.
"Cousin... What the fuck? You don't... Holy shit." Richie muttered, shaking his head.
"Carmen, have you lost your mind?" Natalie snapped. She was angry- no, furious. "You left your wife? You left your pregnant wife?"
"Yes, fuck, yes, I just... I needed to fuckin' think!" Carmen threw his hands out. "I can't think! She just... We weren't planning it and-and then... I just needed to think!"
"Then think at home! Or-Or with the person you're having a baby with, Carmen, Jesus!" Natalie roared back.
"Cousin, you... you fucked up." Richie said solemnly, nodding in agreement. "I mean, I've done a lot of shit. A lot, ok? Just ask Tiff. But I...I never fuckin' left."
"No, she just fuckin' left you, right? Tiff couldn't take you bein' an-"
"Hey, woah, take it fuckin' easy, Cousin. Watch it. This ain't about me." Richie snarled, finger jabbing in Carmen's direction. "I didn't fuck this up, ok? You did. This is your shit. We're just tryin' to fuckin' help you, so why don't you do all that de-escelatin' bullshit and take a fuckin' breath and relax."
Carmen's teeth ground tight, eyes flickering over to Natalie. "I'm with Richie on this." She snapped. "You did fuck up. Huge."
Carmen could feel the burn, rising in his throat. Was it fear? Vomit? Tears? Regret? All of the above?
"I know, I know, fuck, I know." Carmen muttered, falling back into the chair. "I just... I know, and-and now I don't know..." Carmen could feel his heart rate, waves of guilt and realization crashing over him, leaving him feeling sick.
Carmen stood quickly, hands tangled in his hair, pacing in the small area of the office. "Holy shit, she's gonna leave me. She-She's gonna leave me, and-and... Fuck! Why do I always do this? I always fuck up! Always! Like... What the fuck? Why-Why-"
"-Carmen." Sugar said slowly, hands on his shoulders, stopping him. "Hey, breathe. Breathe. Just... Just relax, ok?"
"No, no, no, I-I can't fuckin' relax. I-I got to-" Carmen rambled, his chest squeezing, burning.
"Carm, look, just... Just do the breathing thing. Listen to Natalie." Richie nodded towards Sugar. "And we'll get it handled, alright? We can't fix this until you calm the fuck down."
"Richie," Natalie hissed, rolling her eyes in irritation. "Carmen, breath in through your nose, out through your mouth. Innnnn and Out." She mimicked for him, slow pulls of air and soft exhales.
Carmen could hear you. Hear you in his head telling him to calm down, feel your hands on his cheeks, your soft praises and coos. His heart ached but it tricked his mind enough to listen, shaky rasps of air falling in and out until he was on sitting in the chair, knee bouncing with adrenaline.
Natalie shook her head lightly, looking over at Richie, then Carmen. "You need to go talk to her."
"I know. I know, Nat, but I got a dinner rush-"
"Carmen." Natalie sneered, in that tone. The tone she used usually with her own kids. A tone of finality.
"I got it covered, Cousin, alright? I got it." Richie nodded, patting Carmen on his back. "Just... Go figure your shit out."
"Yeah." Natalie huffed, eyes narrowed at her younger brother. "You better bring that poor girl some flowers or something. Better make it up to her, Carmen, that is so gross of you."
Carmen nodded softly, grabbing his back pack, shedding his apron. "I-I'll have my phone on me-"
"-Go!" Richie and Natalie yelled in unison.
"I got it, Cousin." Richie shook his head.
"Yeah, and you have other things to worry about." Natalie snapped. "More important things, like your marriage, and your kid."
Carmen's heart skipped at that. It sounded weird, unnatural. His kid. Mind racing back to images of you with his niece and nephew. How Chelle took to you so naturally when you first met her, cradling her in your arms while Natalie scampered off for a shower. Carmen's heart swelled at the thought, how he had watched you, how good you were at it.
He knew you'd be a good mom. Had no doubt about that. That wasn't the issue. No, the problem was him.
Carmen Berzatto, who's family was the epitome of chaos, and who's genes this baby would have. Would the baby have your eyes and his crippling anxiety? His curls and his coping skills? Your nose and smile, and his family's addiction gene?
You would be the perfect mom. You were already so perfect in every way to Carmen. Too kind and forgiving and funny and sweet to him, he couldn't understand why you loved him sometimes. You would be good no matter what.
You'd be better without him.
His mind screamed it over and over. He couldn't shake the thought last night, sitting on the steps of your home, chain smoking through half a pack while his mind raced, horrible voices mocking and sneering at him, telling him he wasn't good enough; that he wouldn't be good enough. That you would be better off alone.
Then he was walking. Walking as fast as he could away from your home, back to the restaurant, where he could distract himself. Where he could trick his mind to focus on anything else other than you.
It didn't work, of course. It never did.
His mind still raced, all the way back to your home- his home. The home he shared with you. The place you bought for the future; your future together. A future that now, looked like it would be a little fuller.
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You gripped the porcelain of the toilet seat, stomach lurching again, spilling the contents of- you didn't even know what. How there was anything left, you weren't sure.
Your nose burned with tears, head drumming with a dull ache, throat burning with the acidity flare of bile. And worst of all, the only person you wanted was Carmen.
You were furious, hurt, just... confused with him, but your body still ached for him. For him to come in, rub your back and coo at you. Settle you and calm you, like he always did.
The front door closed softly, the thud of the latch echoing through the all too still house. Anchovy chirped and trilled, Carmen's soft, raspy greeting back to him making your body jolt.
You stayed still, waiting and quiet with each muffled footstep of Carmen's, his sneakers falling closer and closer until the door opened gently. Your gaze on his, watching him with wide, red rimmed eyes from the bathroom floor. His own reflecting down on you, hand still gripping the door knob.
"You... You're still sick?" Carmen asked, awkward and unsure. He didn't know what to say, where to even begin.
"Yeah." You sneered, hand slapping on the knob, flushing the toilet. "Guess that'll be happening for a while."
Carmen flinched at your tone. You were angry. No, you were hurt. The revelation made him feel like he needed to throw up next, the ache in his stomach rivaling the one in his chest.
You pushed up off the tub, Carmen's hands reaching to help you. You slapped them away with a menacing scoff. "Don't touch me." You snapped. "I've got it."
Carmen nodded, backing out slowly, giving you space to brush your teeth. He didn't miss the tremor in your hands when you held the toothbrush, refusing to meet his eyes in the mirror.
"I..." Carmen's voice shook, a squeak of a word that had wobbled when he spoke. "I, uh, I-I'm sorry."
Your eyes flashed to his furiously, lips pursing. "I know that's... fuck, that's not..." Carmen sighed heavily, a grounding breath to soothe his nerves, get the shake out of his voice. "I don't know what-what else to say other than... I'm sorry."
"You're sorry?" You sneered, turning to him, your tone unnervingly calm. "You're fucking sorry?"
"Yeah, I-"
"-You left me!" You roared, chest heaving with fury. Your fears and sadness had turned into rage, pure rage.
"I go outside to check on you, and you're gone! Who the fuck does that, Carmen? What the fuck is wrong with you?" You screamed.
"I-I don't know, I just..." Carmen's chest tightened, strangling his words. The pounding in his chest had returned, as had the queasiness in his stomach.
"You just? Just what, Carmen? Just don't want to be with me anymore?" Your voice cracked, tears brimming your waterline.
The silence was back. Uncomfortably loud and suffocating. Neither one of you moved, just stared at each other through heaving chests.
"I-I..." Carmen swallowed the bile rising in his throat. "How could you... You think I-I don't want to be with you?"
"Well, what else am I supposed to think, Carmen?" You scoffed, throwing your hands out in exasperation. "You left!"
Carmen winced at the harshness of your tone. "I didn't... I just needed to think-"
"-Think?" You scoffed. "Think about what exactly, Carmen? Huh? Whether you were going to stay-"
"-No! Fuck, no!" Carmen barked, mind racing and overwhelmed. Hands trembling, heart pounding, he stared at you. "About... About how it would be. About how I would be."
"How you would be?"
"Yeah, how I would be." Carmen snaps, a little too defensive even for his own liking. It was habit, even after years of trying to be better, it still crept out at times.
Carmen took a breath, turning to you. "I'm... I don't think I'm going to be a good dad."
Your own heart sunk, a dull ache in your chest, heavy with the weight of his words. The fall of his face, lips curling downward. "Carmen," You said softly. "Why-Why would you... We've talked about having kids before."
"Yeah, but not... I thought I had time." Carmen admitted, hands shaking when he crossed his arms over his chest to still them. "I-I thought I would have some time to-to get my shit together."
You paused, watching his face crumble. The deep breath he took to keep himself from crying- from breaking. "I don't- I don't wanna be a bad dad. I don't wanna fuck this kid up." Carmen whispered, eyes darting everywhere but your own. He couldn't look at you when he said it, sure when he saw the sorrow in your own eyes he would crumble at your feet.
"Carmen," You said softly, taking a step towards him. He took one back, distancing himself. He knew what you were going to do. Reach out and comfort him, make him feel better- he didn't deserve that.
"Carm, please," You begged lightly. "You... You know you're gonna be a good dad-"
"-No, no, I don't know that." Carmen scoffed, shaking his head. "I mean, my fuckin' dad was a piece of shit, so was his dad, so-so will I. And-And I don't wanna do that to this kid. I don't wanna do that to you."
"Stop." You snapped, lips pressed together, sniffling to keep your own tears at bay. "Just...Just stop. Ok? Stop. You're... Do you really think I would have married you if I thought that bad of you? Do you think I would have ever even entertained the thought of having a baby with you, starting a family, if I thought you'd be shitty?"
Carmen's own eyes shone with unshed tears. You blinked, wiping the hot tears that ran down your cheeks away. "I'm scared, too. I-I called Alicia over you because I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how you would react." You admitted.
Carmen nodded, you could see the hurt in his eyes. "So you knew I would react like this? You didn't tell me because you knew I'd be a bad-"
"-No, I didn't tell you because I know you don't like surprises." You snapped. "I know you don't like to be fuckin' blindsided and-and shocked. I don't either. I knew it would shock you. I knew it wasn't apart of our plan right now." You held his gaze, eyes hard when you met his.
"But I never thought you'd be a bad dad." Your tone was firm. It made Carmen's heart swell. "I still don't think you'd be a bad dad, for the record. I think you're an asshole, and I'm furious with you." You said pointedly.
Carmen nodded. "Yeah, yeah, I... I don't blame you f'that." He muttered, looking down at his hands, wedding band shining almost mockingly back up at him. "Sugar's pissed at me. Richie, too." He paused, eyes lifting to yours. "I'm mad at me too."
"Yeah? Me too." You sigh, looking at him. "You can't just leave-"
"-I know." Carmen nodded. "I-I know. I don't... I'm sorry." Carmen looked at you, shoulders falling slightly. "I'm so sorry."
You nodded gently, wiping your eyes with the back of your hands. "This is not how I thought this would go, honestly." You admitted with a small, wet laugh.
"Which part?" Carmen hummed, hesitantly reaching out to wipe your tear stained cheek with the pad of his thumb.
"All of it." You sighed. "But telling you. I-I always thought I'd do one of those cute, little Pinteresty things and surprise you."
"Yeah? 'm sorry." Carmen muttered, his heart fluttering with guilt again. "Maybe next time?"
You scoffed, rolling your eyes at him. Damn him, making you smile when you were supposed to be mad at him- you were still mad at him. But you were tired even more. Exhausted emotionally, physically- you just wanted to crawl into bed.
Carmen pulled you closer to him, his hand running down your spine. "Maybe you can do that cutesy shit to tell everyone else." He suggested. "I mean... Fuck, well, I-I told Richie and-and Sugar, but... Tina? Or all them?"
You bit back a smile, the curl of your lips betraying you. "Yeah." You hum, your body betraying you as you sunk into Carmen's chest.
"Here," Carmen muttered, pulling you close to him. "I'll get you in bed, and I'll go on the couch-"
"-No," You sighed, shuffled steps down the hall. "I don't... Just sleep in the bed with me."
Carmen hesitated. "No, I-I can stay on the couch. I know you don't-"
"-I can't sleep without you, Carm." You pleaded. "I didn't sleep at all last night, and-and... I just want to sleep."
Carmen nodded, following you into the shared bedroom. Stripping out of his jeans, trading them for sweatpants, before climbing in the bed with you. You stayed on your side, Carmen on his own. There was still tension, still lingering feelings of that familiar eeriness, but there was also comfortability.
Carmen would make it up to you. He'd be at every appointment, paint the nursery- be everything you knew he would be. Later. In the coming weeks as you two welcomed, embraced the baby coming. You'd get to tell everyone in your cutesy way like you'd dreamed. Tina's reaction would make you cry, and the baby shower would make you sob. You'd mull over baby names for hours with Carmen, going back and forth, testing each name tentatively until you found the perfect one.
For now, you were happy just to know Carmen was here with you. You were happy just to sleep. There was still so much ahead of you- of both of you.
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Note
Please more dad max.
Maybe a bit of angst where someone says he wouldn’t make a good father. But it’s all happy in the end.
Cw: reader is pregnant, mentions Jos and his parenting
He never had a good example to begin with, how is he supposed to be any different or any good?
Your baby bump was getting harder and harder to hide, so when the time felt right, you and Max walked along the paddock hand in hand, your baby bump now noticeable with the dress you were wearing. You received a lot of congratulations and compliments, but that one comment Max heard being made about him stuck in his mind for the whole weekend.
You flew home straight after the race, resting your feet up on the footrest of the jet while Max layed his head on your thighs, "I know there's something on your mind, Max", you tapped his cheek, noticing everyone else was asleep but you two, "do you want to share it?", you wondered.
"Do you think I'll be a good father? I didn't have the best example, it's true when they say that I won't be that good - how could I be?", he rambled on.
"Hey, hey", you urged, "slow down now, where is this coming from?", you questioned, "who are "they"? Who said that?".
"I heard one of the people from the commentary section - it wasn't live or anything and I'm sure they didn't want me to hear it, but maybe they're not wrong, you know?", he picked it up again.
"Max, don't entertain those thoughts for a second longer, please, love", you cooed, cupping his cheek as he sat up straight against the seat, "you know what it it to grow up with a childhood you didn't like, and that's why you'll be different from him", you stated, "I know you won't do anything like what happened to you, so don't let them get to you", you kissed his cheek.
"What if I yell at them when I'm nervous? Or do something that scares them? Or do something that hurts them - Goodness, no, not that", he groaned, all of the possibilities filling his thoughts.
"Max, do you think I won't do things I'll regret later? Or that I won't mess it up sometimes?", you wondered, "do you think I'll be a bad mother because of that?".
"Of course not, liefje! I wouldn't want anyone else to have children with, you'll be the best mama", he smiled, the thought of you being half of the parenting team soothing his worries.
"Then you'll be the best papa for our little ones, because you care about doing it right, because you care enough about me and them to make sure we're protected, loved and safe!", you smiled, feeling like he was finally listening to you.
"Thank you", Max kissed your lips, rubbing your baby bump, "Oh- was that...? Was that a kick?", he gasped.
"Yes, that was a quick - hi little one", you cooed, placing your hand next to his so you could feel how it felt from the outside, "they're agreeing with me - because mama knows best and she's right - and because they know papa is the best", you smiled, cuddling up to him and kissing his jaw as he tried to get the baby to kick again.
(Thank you for sending this in ✨️)
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ageingfangirl2 · 6 months
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I Want A Divorce! Shanks (OPLA)
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You get ill and Shanks offers to do your jobs around the ship, but he gets distracted easily and wants your praise. You love the man-child, but sometimes you have to tell him to actually like his age. Shanks x Reader FLUFF!
'You have a high fever so I'm going to recommend bed rest until it breaks, can't have you getting any worse,' Hongo states, placing a cold cloth on your forehead which was nice in your current state.
You cough, 'I guess I can take it easy Hongo.'
Over Hongo's shoulder, you notice Shanks watching and listening intently to the doctor's orders, 'I'm going to do all your jobs so you just rest up.'
You and Hongo snicker sharing a moment, both of you knowing Shanks wouldn't be able to cope with all that you did around the ship without complaining. Hongo pats your shoulder as he gets up from the bed. Shanks immediately takes his spot, tucking you in. You were the fourth crew member to join and the only female, and had been charmed into dating the notorious red-haired pirate.
'I love you darling but you don't even know half of what I do around here,' you whisper, throat sore.
Shanks puffs out his chest proudly, 'I'm going to make you proud, I'm going to do so good everyone will be begging me to do your jobs instead.'
You smile as he leans down and kisses the cold cloth.
TWO DAYS LATER
Shanks bursts through the doors of his quarters which you shared and throws himself on the bed next to you burying his face in a pillow. He could be an overdramatic diva at times but he was your diva. Before you can say anything Lucky walks in holding a tray of food that makes your mouth water and forget your partner.
'How are you feeling? Hongo said you should eat more fruit so I made you a fruit salad for after your soup.'
Ignoring Shanks who was now mumbling into the pillow you sit up and accept the tray of food and glass of water, 'You're all too good to me Lucky. How are the new guys?'
Lucky shrugs his shoulders, 'confused and maybe a little scared because they follow your instructions which makes captain grumpy.'
You nod, 'I'll talk to him. Thanks for the update.'
Lucky leaves and closes the door behind him. Shanks rolls onto his side and reaches for the fruit salad but you swat his hand away, 'My fruit salad captain.'
Shanks pouts, sticking out his bottom lip and shooting you his best puppy dog eyes, 'Why didn't you tell me what you did? I wouldn't have agreed otherwise. I love you, but dealing with the new crew is tedious.'
Just wait until he found out all the other odd jobs you did to help out the rest of the crew, there was a reason people called you mother hen. You pop a slice of apple in your mouth and sigh, 'What do you want me to do darling? Give you a pat on the back? Feed you a treat, give you a belly rub and call you a good boy? It's not easy but you never back down from a challenge. I know you'll give it your all until I get better.'
Shanks sits up and stops pouting, a look of determination in his eyes, 'You're right I can do this. I'm going to make you proud.'
You scoff as he steals some grapes and jumps off the bed with a new lease of life, you really did have him wrapped around your little finger.
FOUR DAYS LATER
Your fever had come down and you didn't feel like death anymore, but Hongo insisted you stay in bed for a few more days. The crew had bets on Shanks he didn't know about, he'd gotten better at doing your jobs but wasn't great. You promised to stay in bed so the crew could make some money off your partner.
THREE DAYS LATER
You were sat up in bed reading the newspaper feeling much better and enjoying relaxing for once. Shanks walks in and climbs on top of you, lying on you with his full weight, 'I know your secret babe,' he chuckles, head now resting on your chest, eyes locked with yours but he doesn't look upset.
You put the paper down and start running your fingers through his hair, 'Hongo asked me to stay in bed longer, I actually enjoyed not having as many responsibilities, makes a nice change. I'm sorry for deceiving you, Shanks.'
Shanks nuzzles into your hands more enjoying the massage, 'Now I know how much you do I want you to slow down. I'll try and help more when I can, and the crew promised to fix their own problems before coming to you for help babe.'
'Thank you. However, you lying on top of me is making parts of my body fall asleep.'
Shanks smirks, 'I'll wake them up when I need them.'
You throw your head back and laugh at his playful and flirty antics, 'I want a divorce.'
Shanks matches your laughter, 'I'm never letting you go, you mean too much to me. Maybe a few years after the marriage you can talk about a divorce.'
For all the years the two of you had been together you weren't engaged, everyone assumed you were married and the two of you kind of went with the flow. Little did you know Shanks wasn't joking about marriage this time around.
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lovers-rck · 7 months
Note
fic rec where someone from the club hosts a party and reader and hazel go and they get a little drunk and pj locks them in a room together until they admit their feeling to each other and things get a little hot n heavy :)
intentional lowercase ;) thank you!
also i did a very vague correction so forgive me if there are any mistakes! english is not my first language.
"seven minutes in heaven!" you hear pj yell and run away, except that you and hazel weren't playing that game.
hazel chukled and went to open the door, almost tripping over a ball of dirty cloth. She grabbed the door handle and tried to open.
the first time doesn't work, but she knows she is a little bit drunk and maybe she was opening the wrong way. the second time doesn't work either, and that's when she starts to worry.
"it's locked" she says "pj locked the door"
"what? " you say "let me try" the room is dimly lit, highlighting the worried features that took over hazel's face.
you grab and try to open the door. one, two, three times later you realized that, in fact, is locked. pj locked the door and ran away for who knows how much time.
"im sure this is one of her pranks" hazel looks at you, her eyes a little sleepy from the alcohol "she will come back in a few minutes"
but you are impacient. three minutes has passed. you look at the posters in Annie's walls, all with a inspirational quote about women and printed pictures of Simone de Beauvoir. five minutes. hazel groans in protest, looking at her dirty shoes and thinking why she didn't clean them before going out, she's embarrassed now. seven minutes pass. eight. nine. ten. eleven. twelv...
"pj!" hazel screams "pj let us out please! i already apologized to you when i said that you only created the club to fuck cheerleaders! please!"
for the next ten seconds the only things you hear is hazel's voice, she's loud and desperate, her hands hitting the wooden door for so long that you almost find a rhythm.
eventually hazel gives up, and in a matter of seconds all the loud noises that she made earlier end up causing her a big headache. she feels less drunk than before, but the after feeling isn't so much better. then she looks at you, sitting in the floor, your legs crossed like a kid and your eyes resting. you were a chill drunk, hazel was a chaotic one.
she find a very strange feeling looking at you, something growing in her stomach. hazel never saw you the way she was seeing you now, always admiring you in secret, always playing the fool when you catch her eye in between classes or practice. she knew that this wasn't product of the alcohol, and that scared her.
so she tried and is currently trying to ignore that little feeling growing inside of her, that little tiny and obviously-not-romantic feeling that became stronger everyday.
okay yes. she was in love with you. so what?
it was not a big deal. it's not like at the very sight of you she becomes dumb and slow and words come out of her mouth like vomit without thinking. it's not like she freeze everytime you touch her or grab her hand. it's not like she is completely, hopelessly, in love with you.
okay it was bad.
"we have to get out of here" hazel says "I'll become anxious and you know i left therapy last week!"
so you get up and grabs hazel's hand. you guide her to sit in Annie's bed, standing in front of her and demand her to breath with you.
inhale, exhale, inhale, exhale.
you don't let go of her hand at any time, and neither does hazel. you look at her, her eyes are closed and her lips swell as she exhales the air as you taught her. you look at her and the sudden impulse to scream what you feel for her invades you.
but you two are friends, and friends don't do that. friends help each other without expecting anything in return. but you realized that you didn't want to be hazel's friend when after every shared moment you expected something in return, something to give you a hint, something to answer the doubt that has been in your heart for a long time.
¿did she look at you with those eyes in purpose? ¿did she caressed your cheek in accident that one time? ¿did she makes jokes about couples with you just for the laughs? ¿did she likes you?
the last question is the worst, you consider.
"thank you" hazel says, and you smile slightly in return. always waiting for something else.
and you think she gaves you something in return when you feel her thumb caressing your hand. she stares at your intertwined hands, and so do you.
shyness takes over your bodie, and the giggly and playful hazel disappears. it was always easier to pretend that nothing happened, that all the touches were accidents and all the looks meant nothing. to pretend that they were just meaningless feelings.
but neither of you can do that anymore when you feel hazel pull your hand slowly, bringing your body closer to hers but leaving a space, leaving open the door of regret. you close that door the moment your free hand caresses her face and she smiles at you.
"can i..."
"yes" you say "please"
she obey and guide your bodie to bend down slightly for her to kiss you. you inhale sharply when her lips makes contact with yours for the first time, and suddenly a scared feeling takes over your body
but hazel grabs your face and you understand that there is nothing to fear when you are with her.
her kiss is delicate and slow, but hungry. she grabs your legs and sits you in her lap, not getting enough of you. her mind cannot comprend what is happening, but is unable to stop it. her fingertips swim across your skin, trying to memorize every feeling, every texture that is so new to her.
she fears that she might be a little rough or fast with you, that maybe she crossed the invisible line. she freeze and for a moment she just stay there, her forehead against yours, breathing and trying to process the last five minutes.
"did i do something wrong?" you murmured
"no, no, you did nothing wrong"
"what's wrong?"
she swallows and hold your hand "nothing is wrong"
"don't be scared"
"im not scared" hazel replies, hating how you read her so easily. you raise you eyebrow "okay maybe i am a little scared"
"of what?"
you heard how the girls are laughing at something downstairs.
"i don't know" she exhales "im afraid you won't be my friend anymore after this"
"we were kissing and you were all worried about our friendship?
"yes!" she replies "your friendship is very important to me"
"i know" you gently put a strand of hair behind her ear "your friendship is important to me too. im not gonna ignore you after this if that's what you fear hazel"
"okay" she nodds "okay"
you laugh slightly "okay"
and you kiss her again, more desperate than before. hazel quickly responds to your body and grabs your waist, pushing you towards her.
you move slightly in her lap and she gasp. the strap of your shirt falls off your shoulder and hazel leaves your lips to find a home on the skin of your neck and shoulder. she kiss and bite the flesh, your breathing becoming a little louder.
in a bold act, you grab hazel's hands and place them in your breasts, hoping that she would catch the sign.
and she does, so she moves you shirt up and start massaging your flesh, you nipples alrrady hard to receive hazel's hands. you whimper lightly when you feel hazel's tongue, leaving a trail of kisses all over your tits.
her hand starts going down when you both heard the lock of the door and a scream
"oh my god!" pj screams and hazel cover your breast with her hands in panic "oh my god! guys! guys! oh my god"
pj jumps and start running away, her screams invading the house
"it worked! guys it worked!" pj screams downstairs "the were sucking each other's titties!"
and all the girls scream with her.
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steddieas-shegoes · 3 months
Text
i could listen all night
for @steddielovemonth prompt 'love is wanting to hear every detail of their day'
rated t | 803 words | cw: recreational drug use (weed) | tags: established relationship, stargazing, they're so in love
💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟💟
"And it's not even that I'm worried about failing the test!" Steve said as he leaned back against the wall of their too-small balcony. "I did a practice test yesterday and only missed one question. I just feel like it's too easy."
"I think you're just smarter than you give yourself credit for, Stevie," Eddie said as he exhaled smoke.
"I don't think that's it."
Eddie rolled his eyes fondly.
They didn't love their apartment. It was on the third floor of a three story townhome that seemed to be a revolving door of large families who couldn't make rent after a couple of months. They'd get close to someone on the first floor and they'd be evicted two months later. They'd finally have a quiet neighbor below them only to find out it was an old man who was moved to a nursing home a month after moving in.
But they at least had this balcony that faced a parking lot of some business that was empty and closed by the time they needed to smoke.
And when Steve graduated, they could move closer to whatever school he ended up working at.
"What if I don't graduate?" Steve asked quietly, reaching out for the joint Eddie had just taken a third pull off of. "What if I'm doing all this for nothing?"
Eddie turned to Steve as much as he could, covered his hand in comfort. "If anyone knows what it's like not to graduate, it's me. And it's not the end of the world. It may feel like it at first, but just because you don't do it when you think you should doesn't mean you won't ever. You're smart and you work hard, sunshine, you're gonna graduate."
"You have to say that. You're my boyfriend."
"I don't have to say anything! I told you just this morning that you were stupid if you thought I wasn't gonna wake up just to kiss you goodbye," Eddie pecked his cheek and took the join back from him.
He knew Steve got emotional if he smoked too much, and he'd already reached the glassy eye part of the high. Better to stop him now.
"Other than your professor scaring you, what happened today?" Eddie asked casually. He wanted to hear about everything, and Steve liked talking about it.
"I had the best cup of tea. The library was giving free cups to students who donated $1 to the writer's club. So I guess it wasn't really free, but still, $1 for the best cup of tea I've ever had isn't bad." Steve leaned his head on Eddie's shoulder. "I studied for an hour between classes and saw these two women making out. One was like, a lot older than the other and I'm almost certain she was a professor with a student. Don't know what that's about."
Eddie raised his brows, but stayed quiet as Steve continued.
"And then I managed to eat my sandwich after my second class. Best one you've made yet. Perfect ham to turkey ratio," Steve kissed his neck.
"Glad you liked it, sweetheart."
"Oh! And there's gonna be a student run show next Friday. I get two free tickets if you wanna go. Maybe we could make it a date night?"
"I think that sounds lovely. Write it on the fridge and I'll make sure I'm home in time to get ready for it," Eddie took one last drag from the joint before putting it out in the ash tray he grabbed from the flea market downtown when they first moved in. "Anything else today?"
"I got to sit outside and look at the stars with my boyfriend. That's been pretty nice," Steve whispered.
Eddie felt his cheeks heat up, never quite used to how easily Steve shared his love and affection. He'd been like that before they were even together, overwhelmingly honest.
"Was he good company?" Eddie teased, leaning his head on top of Steve's and looking up at the few stars they could see in the city.
"He's always good company."
Eddie kissed the top of Steve's head and settled back.
"What about your day?" Steve asked, sinking further into his side.
"My day was boring." Eddie sighed. "But we have new releases hitting the shelves tomorrow. Those days are always fun."
"Any you want?" Steve sounded tired.
It was barely eight at night, but the weed was hitting and he'd been up since five that morning going nonstop.
"Might grab this local band's demo. We're the only place carrying it and they're hoping to do a show in our basement next month, but we'll see. Brad said we had to see how the demos sell."
"Sounds like fun," Steve said.
"You wanna go inside, sweetheart?"
"Not yet. Keep talking. Wanna hear about everything."
"Mkay, baby."
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auteurdelabre · 1 month
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SO MUCH TO LOSE - CHAPTER 8 - Dark!Joel x f!Reader
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rating is 18+ folks! words: 6.8k pairing: dark!Joel x f!Reader tags: Mentions of past trauma (Sarah death), Dan Brown, sexual tension, mentions of alcohol, Joel has PTSD. NO use of y/n. A/N: I got some amazing comments here and on A03 where one user breaks down each chapter and highlights what they liked with hilarious commentary and I'll be honest its what has me tip tapping away so quick! Please be sure to spread the love and leave a comment! masterlist here --------------------
Chapter 8: Shoulder to Shoulder
You're halfway through your latest acquisition, The DaVinci Code, a book Jennifer lent you last week. You're so engrossed in a world so unlike your own that you're startled when Ellie slaps herself across from you at the table, barking out your name. 
"When are we baking?"
"I gave Joel the list the last time I saw him," you tell her honestly. "As soon as he has the ingredients we can do it."
Ellie sighs, slumping in irritation. 
"Who knows when that'll be," she groans. "He takes forever to do stuff."
You watch as her posture suddenly stiffens, her eyes peering over your shoulder. 
"What's wrong?"
"Dina." Ellie sneers. "She's so annoying."
Your glance over your shoulder to see Dina laughing with a group of teens. Your eyes dart back to Ellie's face to see her cheeks are flushed and she's still staring over your shoulder. 
"Ellie, have you ever heard the saying that there's a fine line between love and hate?"
"No."
"When I was your age it was the people that I pretended not to like that I actually did," you tell her sagely. Ellie wrinkles her nose.
"What does that mean?"
"It means I wonder if you might have feelings for Dina," you say softly. "Romantic feelings." 
You don't want to scare her, but you also can sense that there's something there. 
"She's a girl," Ellie laughs, but her smile is flat. 
"So?"
"So I'm a girl," Ellie tells you as if you're dim. 
"Girls can like girls."
Judging by the way Ellie stares at you, this concept is either foreign to her or she doesn't want to share this part of herself with you just yet. 
You see the way Ellie squirms in her seat, her cheeks pinking and you decide to drop the subject. You go back to your book, chewing your oatmeal slowly. You feel Ellie's eyes on you. 
"Could you come over this week anyway?" She asks, eyes wide. "We could make those paper flowers like you made for Maria?"
The thought of being in Joel's home so close to your last interaction with him makes you work hard to hold back your grimace. 
"Why don't you come to mine?" You ask, trying to sound neutral. "I have all the supplies there."
"Okay, I'll tell Joel," Ellie is smiling brightly. "And maybe-"
Before she can finish you hear your name being called. Ellie's scowl is back as she watches Jennifer round on the table, her tray filled with eggs, oatmeal and tea. Behind her is Luke is giving you both a shy smile. 
"Morning guys," Jennifer says brightly. "Mind if we join you?" 
"I'll let you know when Joel gets the stuff," Ellie mutters to you, preparing to stand. "See you later."
"You don't have to leave," Jennifer insists in a saccharine tone you just know Ellie despises. 
Ellie mutters about needing to get to school, sliding off the bench seat and moving past Jennifer who tries to throw a smile her way. 
"Bye Ellie." 
Jennifer slides her tray across from you, slumping into her seat, obviously disappointed. Luke takes the empty bench seat next to her, his eyes on his food. 
"She hates me," Jennifer says with a frown. 
"Nah she's just shy," you lie, not wanting Jennifer's feelings to be hurt. She gives you a knowing smile before looking at the novel in your hands. 
"You enjoying the book?"
"Yeah, thanks for lending it to me," you say with a smile. 
"I liked his first one Angels and Demons,” Luke offers gently when he sees what you’re reading, his voice a husky murmur. You like how he doesn't quite meet anyone's eyes when he talks. It's endearing. 
"I’ve never read his stuff before,” you offer. “Not particularly good writing, but it’s nice to read about somewhere that isn’t all raiders and clickers.”
Jennifer watches the two of you as she sips her tea, her light eyes volleying between the two of you as you talk about the book. 
"I thought Luke could shoot with us today," Jennifer says with a queer little smile. "He was saying he wanted to get better for when he and I are on patrols. Is that okay?"
Luke gives you a nervous little smile. "I understand if you just want it to be you two."
You find the thought of more time spent with Luke to be a very appealing idea.
"Of course you can join."
"Great." 
You watch Jennifer and Luke who chat quietly to one another, feeling strangely left out. You preferred it when it was just Jennifer with her soft way of talking to you. 
Luke excuses himself to get some more eggs and the second he's out of earshot Jennifer is leaning forward conspiratorially. 
"He's cute, huh?"
"I guess, yeah."
"Pretty sure he likes you," Jennifer giggles. "I mentioned we were doing shooting lessons and he was suddenly all keen." 
You feel your cheeks heat up at the suggestion. Romance has never really been something you thought about. Survival had always been your focus, even here in Jackson where you have a warm bed and a roof over your head the back of your mind is always fixed on what could come next. 
"He's nice," is all you offer.
It's a honest reply because, you really do think he's nice. He's gentle and he doesn't make you feel anxious like some of the leering men of Jackson. He’s soft and quiet and maybe that’s what makes your pulse jump a bit when he rejoins you seconds later.
///
"You close one eye completely, you lose peripheral vision and depth perception, and you need these to acquire the target and determine lead."
Jennifer speaks like she's reading from a book that everyone has already read and memorized. But none of it makes sense to you and you feel your frustration building.
You and Luke have been practicing with her all afternoon, your forehead dotted with sweat. And while yes, your shot is much better now that you’re aiming with the right eye, you feel like you’re still not good enough.
“You’re doing so well,” she encourages nonetheless, smiling at you.
“You really are,” Luke insists from behind you. Luke is a fast learner, already a decent shot. He’s been doing it a lot longer than you have, and using the correct eye.
“Not good enough,” you mutter sourly to yourself. “Missed that last can.”
Jennifer looks over to the can placed at a fair distance in one of the trees. You’ve hit most of the other ones, but that one keeps evading you.
“Honey that’s a far shot,” Jennifer says covering her eyes with her hand to block the winter sun. “Even I don’t get it most of the time.”
“I didn’t get it once.”
For some reason you can’t stop hearing Joel’s voice in the back of your head: useless. It feels like with every miss you’re just proving his point further.
“Okay sourpuss,” Jennifer says with a roll of her eyes. “We’re taking a break and getting a drink down at the Bison.”
The two of you agree, falling in line behind her. You watch her light hair dance in the breeze as she chats animatedly to the two of you. You wonder why she isn’t inviting her other friends to join you when it belatedly hits you.
She’s trying to get you and Luke together. You think of her winks and nudges and suddenly you know exactly what she’s doing. You want to be embarrassed or even irritated, but instead you find your heartbeat jumping.
The three of you leave your weapons at Jennifer’s before heading down into town. Your mood is lightened a bit by their company and the bright day. Snow has come to Jackson, just a small sprinkling but a definite harbinger of greater snowfall ahead.
The three of you push into the rowdy pub, filled with familiar faces. Some play cards, others are telling stories over pints. A woman named (Reba or Rebecca you think?) stands behind the pub, waving you in and telling you to shut the door because of the draft.
A few folks wave and call out hello’s to Jennifer who returns them with a beaming smile.
The three of you find an empty booth and pull off your jackets and scarves. You take a seat in the booth against the wall, a habit from before; you like to know what’s going on. From here you can see most everything and everyone who enters the space.  Jennifer sits opposite you, Luke following close behind. From here you can see his face, taking in the friendly way his eyes crinkle when he smiles, and the slight gap in his front teeth.
The Tipsy Bison is self serve and you offer to grab the first round, thanking Reba at the bar and bringing the three gold-colored pints over to the table. Luke and Jennifer are deep in conversation about home repair.  They look up and thank you when you slide their drinks to them across the lacquered table.
“I still can’t believe they have a jukebox,” Luke breathes, his eyes lighting up when he gazes at the glowing machine. It plays a pulsing beat that you aren’t familiar with, something to keep the space feeling inviting.
“Go put on a tune,” Jennifer insists, nudging him with her elbow. “Something good.”
Luke gives a toothy grin before nodding. The two of you watch his lanky frame make his way over to the jukebox, heard only faintly over the din of the patrons. You watch him go, your eyes sliding over to Jennifer when she giggles.
“You like him.”
“No I don’t,” you answer reflexively. Your cheeks burn and Jennifer knows not to push it further right now. It’s like she can tell you’re a turtle who will retreat inside her shell if threatened. You think of how to distract her, to turn her to another topic, her favorite one.
“Seen Joel lately?”
You hate how his name sounds in your ears. You hate the syllables, hate how it feels in your mouth like a bitter candy. But you don’t tell her that.
You don’t tell Jennifer that since he came on your tits and announced your carnal times had come to an end that you’d actively avoided him. That you hadn’t come out of your house until this afternoon to practice shooting. That you were going so far as to eat tinned soup just so you wouldn’t run into Ellie at meals.
"I swear I give up," Jennifer sighs, dropping her voice to a whisper only the two of you can hear. "Joel Miller is a lost cause. I've given him every hint."
"Maybe he's just shy," you offer with a shrug. For all you know he might be.
"Or maybe he doesn't like me," Jennifer sighs. "Maybe I'll just be single forever."
You smirk at Jennifer's amusing propensity for the dramatic. As if someone that looked and acted like her could be single forever. Beautiful? Check. Good with weapons? Check. Confident? Check. You muse that if you were attracted to women you’d want her for yourself.
"Or maybe he likes someone else," Jennifer offers with a shrug but your attention is back on Luke who is approaching the table. The gentle strains of some old song play in the background. You think you recognize it from car rides with your family. Luke takes his seat next to Jennifer, his eyes scanning between the two of you.
“What did I miss?”
“Just Joel Miller talk,” Jennifer sighs, plopping her chin in her hands. “The man is an enigma.”
"That's the nicest way of saying asshole that I've ever heard,” you mutter.
Jennifer sputters a laugh at your mumbled remark, almost dribbling out some of her beer.
"Shit, you're funny." 
You smile into your mug, trying not to feel too pleased with yourself and failing miserably. You can't remember the last time someone told you that you were funny. Your sister most likely. It feels good.
Before long the three of you have been talking for almost an hour. Your pints are drained and its Luke who stands, cracking his back until you hear the pops.
"I'm going to get another drink. You ladies want anything?"
"I’m okay but she’ll have another," Jennifer says cheerfully pointing at you. When Luke is out of earshot up at the bar she leans across the table in your direction again. 
"I don’t care what you say, you like him and he likes you. I'm sure of it. Just look how attentive he’s being." 
You feel your face flush, pleased. You don't know how she came to this conclusion but you like the sound of it. The door to the Bison props open and you hear Reba sigh as she pours another whiskey for a sleepy looking woman at the bar.
“Tommy close that dang door unless you wanna rustle us up a space heater!”
You feel your eyes drawn over to the door with a small smile starting. It immediately falls from your face when you see that Tommy isn’t alone. His older, taller, sulk of an asshole brother is with him too.
"It’s him," Jennifer whispers, glancing over her shoulder
Fuck. 
Joel Miller walks into every space like he owns it and is disappointed by it. His heavy lidded eyes sail around the room, taking in the patrons, offering polite nods and tight-lipped smiles at the ones he recognizes.
Luke is retrieving the two pints of beer when the Miller brothers take a seat on the empty stools at the bar while Reba busies herself with another customer. You watch over Jennifer’s shoulder as Luke says something you can't hear to Joel. Joel is wearing a glower so menacing it almost makes you gulp. Tommy gives his brother a strange look before answering Luke. 
You turn back to Jennifer, trying to hide the smirk at her dreamy look. You almost laugh when she unbuttons her cardigan until the swell of her cleavage is showing.
“Just go over to him.”
“I can’t,” she says breathless as she looks back to you. “I don’t wanna be too obvious.”
“Never stopped you before,” you joke before freezing when Jennifer’s eyes go wide.
Was that joke too far? Have you fucked this all up? You feel your throat go dry before Jennifer gives a tinkling laugh, slapping your hand affectionately.
“Oh shuddap.”
Relief floods you, distracting you from Luke’s approach until you feel his hand trail over your shoulder lightly.
"Here you go." 
You feel your stomach clench as you take the drink from Luke, eyes skittering shyly from his face to his hand where it lingers on your shoulder a moment longer. 
“Thanks.”
"Do you think he's waiting for us to invite him over?" Jennifer mutters more to herself than anything. 
"I don't think so," Luke says with a forced laugh as he takes his seat beside her. You feel his knee brush against yours under the table and you swallow. 
"I'm gonna do it," Jennifer promises, taking a moment to build her nerve. She takes a sip of your pint, breathing out.  
As she does this you chance a glance in the direction of the stool Joel was occupying, expecting to find it vacated. Instead he sits there, eyes trained in the direction of your table, no doubt gazing at the back of Jennifer’s head.
"Joel! Tommy!" Jennifer suddenly calls over with a cheerful lilt. "Come join us!" 
No. Please no. No no no.
You try to hide your grimace. You don't mind Tommy, but thoughts of avoiding Joel's eyes make you cringe. Especially since you haven’t spoken since he kicked you out of his house last week. You turn your full attention to your pint, hoping that they’ll deny the request.
You hear shuffling and your shoulders rise to your ears. You try to think of a reason that you can leave, but anything you say would be too obvious. Plus, you really like Tommy and Maria, why should you be chased off by Joel every time you have the opportunity to hang out with one of them?
Your pint shows only your haunted reflection before another face swims into view. Joel Miller looking down at you. Even in the swimming reflection his dark eyes pierce you. You jerk your head up, trying to avoid him. You shoot a wobbly smile in his brother’s direction instead.
“Hey Tommy. How’s Maria?”
“Good,” Tommy replies and you can see the relief there in the warm brown of his eyes. He doesn’t look as tired. “She’s with Douglas and some friends right now.”
You nod, not wanting to say anything more that would draw unnecessary attention. But Jennifer seems to have observed her absence.
“I haven’t seen much of Maria lately,” she says, her face curling into a cute pout.  “Not since the baby was born.”
“She doesn’t really like the cold,” Tommy says with a falter.
“Since when?” Jennifer laughs. “Last winter she-“
“I heard in some cultures it’s normal for the mother to stay in bed for at least twenty one days,” you offer quietly. “And they do a celebration a hundred days after the baby is born with, like a big dinner.
All eyes at the table are now on you and you feel a smidgen of relief at having drawn the attention away from the Maria topic. Joel is staring at you with an unreadable look and Jennifer is looking at you with a queer little smile.
“How do you know that?”
“I had a friend who was Japanese.”
“Oh.”
“Anyway,” Tommy breaks in, relief clear in his features, “the reason I came in was because I’m lookin’ for some volunteers for Patrol C’s slot on Friday.”
At this you hasten a glance to your Friday patrol partner who is looking to his brother patiently. Joel holds a half-full pint glass in his hand, the other shoved awkwardly into his coat pocket. He seems to be ignoring you as much as you’re ignoring him.
“There’s that repair in the old library outpost that we gotta fix quick before more snow gets here. We got that lumber in, plus some nails the other day and we need some extra hands to cart it there and build. So I’m tryin’ to scout a few folks who wouldn’t mind helping. Obviously Joel’ll be doin’ most of it.”
"I'm really good with repair," Jennifer chirps eagerly, smiling up at both the Miller brothers. "Especially windows. And Luke used to work in construction."
Luke gives a small, shy wave. You see Joel frown at that before his attention is back on his brother.
"You two sure?" Tommy looks surprised. "Was gonna offer the volunteers extra portions this week as a thanks. You okay with that?"
"Would have done it for free," Jennifer assures him. You hold in a knowing smirk. Yeah, she sure would. She'd do anything to secure more time with Joel. 
“How about you, Luke?”
“I’m game.”
"Great," Tommy says with a grateful smile. "Saves me having to find a few volunteers. You two show up on Friday and we'll put you to work. Lemme know if ya’ll change your mind." 
You figure you’d best speak up because you don’t want to disappoint Tommy but you also know that your skills with home repair are limited. You’d rather be switched that week so someone else can go in your place. You also don’t want to chance that Joel will verbally lambaste you in front of Luke and Jennifer during patrols.
“I’m not much good with repairs,” you offer quietly.
“Oh, I know,” Tommy says with a playful wink shot your way. “I remember the stables last summer.”
You feel Jennifer and Luke’s eyes on you and you even think you can feel Joel’s brows rising in surprise and intrigue.
During your first month in Jackson City you’d attempted to be a part of things by volunteering for the stable rebuild that now houses Chestnut, Glimmer and a host of other horses and livestock. You’d worked so hard in that blazing sun, but no matter what your nails always seemed to bent the wrong way or the wood was crooked. By the middle of the day Tommy was urging you to leave and get some water and that you’d worked enough for one day and should go home to relax.
But you hadn’t missed the way he started taking apart your work before you were even down the street. Hadn’t missed the soft chuckles from some of the others who were working on the project. Half the town had been there that day, maybe even Jennifer, but all you remember the humiliation of seeing your own inadequacy highlighted.
You’d assumed Tommy wouldn’t bring it up. But perhaps he’s a bit more like Joel than you give him credit for.
“Does that mean you want me to do Patrol A or something that week?” you offer, trying to swallow your shame.
"No no, it's your regular patrol day and you've got good eyes," Tommy tells you, all guile gone from his features. "Repairing the window might draw attention. Wanna make sure someone is watching out while the group works." 
You can't deny a feeling of pride that goes through you at the thought that you're important enough to be brought along for the journey. You’d assumed you’d be left behind. You wait for Joel to scoff or roll his eyes but to your delight he does neither.
"Okay." 
Tommy nods and looks like he’s going to set off for home when Jennifer shoots he and Joel a charismatic smile.
“Join us,” Jennifer all but purrs. “We’re just having another round.”
You don’t remind her that her glass is empty. Your eyes go back to your drink, trying to think of a way to extricate yourself from this awkward interaction.  
“I gotta get back to Maria,” Tommy says with a tired smile. “I just needed to get some volunteers and thanks to y’all I have.”
You hear Jennifer’s breathing hitch a moment. “Joel? How about you?”
No. Say no. No.
There’s a pause, a shuffling of boots and then you feel a warm and sturdy body slide into the booth next to you. The booth is tight and the nigh is busy so there’s not much room to spread out. You feel his thigh press into yours and hold in a groan of displeasure.
Why couldn’t Luke have sat next to you at the start? Now you’re stuck being shoulder to shoulder with a man you can barely stand. The four of you sit across from one another like two couples on an increasingly awkward double date.
You all wave Tommy off before the moment grows quiet with only the other patrons as a soundtrack to the evening. You glance out the corner of your eyes to see Joel’s large hand around the pint glass, raising it to his pouty mouth before drinking deeply.
“So you have construction experience, Joel?” Jennifer offers and you don’t miss how she presses her arms together, highlighting her cleavage. You hide an amused smirk behind your glass, thankful that at least you’ll have Jennifer’s antics to amuse you.
“Carpentry.”
“Me too,” Luke offers and you can see him swallow nervously before looking at the elder Miller in the face. “Specifically cabinetry.”
Joel grunts a reply before taking another sip of his beer. As the men sit across from one another you can't help but observe that Luke has long, tapered fingers, like an artist. Joel's fingers are also long but more blunt, more masculine looking. You don't know why you draw the comparison but you do. 
“I used to do framing with-“ Jennifer starts, but Joel has turned his attention to you.
“What was Tommy talkin’ about with you and the stables?”
Why is he talking to you? It’s not like you’re friends. Is he trying to intimidate you? Humiliate you? You don’t meet his gaze.
“Nothing,” you mutter, taking another sip of your pint. “Was nothing.”
“Didn’t sound like nothin’.”
You hold in a grimace. Your eyes shoot across the table and you can see Jennifer eyeing you and Joel a moment before smirking. “I’m kinda curious too.”
Luke gives you an encouraging grin as well and you swallow, licking your lips anxiously because they suddenly feel bone dry. You wish that you were anywhere else but sitting here in a crowded room feeling trapped.
You don’t want to share that humiliation with anyone else, especially Joel who already thinks you’re useless. You want the attention turning to anyone, to anything else. But all eyes at the table are on you and you feel a flush creeping up your neck.
“I have to go.”
Before anyone can interject you’ve stood up, dragging your coat over your shoulders. You’re about to leave when you feel Joel’s hand on your wrist holding you in place. You turn to face him, scowling as you rip your wrist from his embrace.
“Forgot this,” Joel rumbles.
You glance down to see him holding your red scarf in his fingers. He’s holding it in much the same way he always did before winding it around your eyes and at the sight of it in his grip you feel your throat run dry.
Your eyes flick to his, not immune to the way they darken when you swallow. You snatch it from him, offering a quiet thanks and disappearing out the door.
///
It’s Thursday before you come out of your house again.
You’ve been sequestered in your house all week eating tinned tuna and re-reading old books in your collection. You even toyed with the idea of doing something with your boring walls before deciding it was too much work.
Your humiliation at the Bison hasn’t left you. Neither has the way Jennifer threw you under the bus in front of Joel. Why did she go along with him questioning you? She must have seen how embarrassed you were!
She’s been by several times, knocking and calling your name but you never answer. You’re too embarrassed. You think you’re a little angry with her as well. But you don’t know if it’s justified or if you’re just too sensitive.
She tried leaving cookies a few days ago but they were inedible. Seems Jennifer isn’t good at everything. But you decide the next time you see her that you’ll let all of this go.
So when the door knocks that Thursday morning you slowly open the door, expecting to see Jennifer’s face. To your shock it’s Ellie who stands there in a thick blue parka giving you an incredulous look.
“I thought you were dead.”
“Huh?”
“I haven’t seen you at the dining hall,” she says, sniffling.
“Oh just been feeling a little under the weather,” you lie, fingernail absently scraping the wood frame beside your door. You notice that the end of Ellie’s nose is red from the cold. “You wanna come in for a warm drink?”
“Nah, you said we could make flowers.”
“Oh right,” you answer awkwardly glancing from your feet to hers. “Sorry Ellie. We can do it today if you want.”
“You’re not busy?”
“Nope,” you say, moving to give her space to pass. “Come in and-“
“Nah let’s do it at mine,” Ellie insists, taking you by the hand and tugging. “I got a bunch of that colored paper and wire stuff from Maria plus I wanna show you my room. Joel let me convert the whole garage.”
Everything in you screams no, but Ellie’s earnest face has you immediately caving. Plus you promised her. You sigh, pulling on your jacket and allowing her to lead you to Rancher Street.
///
“Then you wrap the wire around the base like that,” you instruct, reminding her about the extra loop. “Yeah, perfect.”
The two of you have been seated at her kitchen table for over an hour. Colorful swatches of ripped paper and wires decorate the wood. Turns out Ellie is a very quick learner when it comes to the arts. It’s not long before she’s folding tulips and peonies even better than you ever could.
Joel is mercifully nowhere to be found. Ellie mentioned he was out with Tommy doing some errand that would take him several hours. Once she’d made that announcement you’d been able to relax some.
It still feels weird to be in Joel’s house. In your head it was a dark dungeon with dishes piled high and guns on every wall.  So far you’ve seem just a bit of the house which is decorated in whites and blues and the deep brown of carved wood. A normal, boring, ordinary house. A few too many framed photos of horses on the wall but he is a man from Texas after all.
The fireplace is cozy today with the chill of the approaching winter, the kind of cold that settles into the bones. But with the fireplace and mugs of hot chocolate that Ellie insisted on making you both, you find you don’t notice it much. As with meals she likes to pepper you with questions.
"What was the last book you were reading back before everything happened?" 
"Mmm that's a good question," you tell her, squinting as you try to recall. "I think it was the latest Harry Potter." 
"Who's Harry Porter?" Ellie asks, her tongue sticking to the side as she focuses on smoothing a particularly stubborn piece of paper.
"Potter," you gently correct her. "It's about a boy wizard."
"Like Gandalf? I already read about him. Joel has those books."
This takes you aback for a moment. In your mind Joel doesn't read. You kind of just assumed that when he's not on patrol or with the horses he's sleeping or cleaning his guns. The thought of him enjoying something the same as you makes him feel more human. 
"No, a young boy goes to wizarding school," you supply. It's a bit of an undersell of the book but Ellie is already rolling her eyes.
"A wizard going to school? That's fucking stupid."
"Couldn't agree more," you say scanning the books she's brought with her. "But they were all the rage."
When the first paper bouquet is finished Ellie announces that she wants to show you her room. She doesn’t give you much option but you smile at the earnestness anyway. You follow her to the door that opens up to the garage. You expect it to be chilly but obviously it’s been insulated well because it’s warmer than the house.
It’s also massive. A large, unmade bed rests by a window on the far side. The walls are lined with mismatched desks and a rolling chair. A couch with a yellow gingham blanket is on the other side, a coffee table made out of crates holds several magazines.
An easel rests nearby, an apron hung upon it. Ellie is quite the artist you’ve come to learn. On the wall you spot a poster of an astronaut and you smile faintly to yourself. You remember your own childhood ambitions of space travel.
Aside from the unmade bed the space is rather meticulous for a teenage girl. You wonder if it’s her upbringing back in her youth or because Joel is a strict caregiver. You still don’t know how long he’s been in her life.  Ellie watches you survey her space with a grin. You think she must feel how you did when you first moved into your space; safe and proud.
You see the sketchbooks piled on one of the desks as you wander over to it.
“You draw?”
“Sometimes,” she says, opening the book and placing it on the table. She flips through a few pages before stopping on a graphite drawing of what appears to be a strange-looking horse.
“I tried drawing Glimmer but I keep fucking up her eyes,” she explains with a pout.
“I think it looks good,” you answer honestly. Ellie glances up at you, shy from the praise before giving a crooked grin. She calls you over to her bookshelf and asks you to look through the titles.
“You read any of these before?”
You crouch down to see all of the titles near the bottom; many are familiar pulpy novels you’d find in an airport. One catches your attention and you tug it from its confines, standing and holding it.
“I remember reading this to my sister,” you murmur, eyes misty. Ellie brushes the hair from her face as she invites you to takes a seat next to her on the couch. The two of you look at the book together, both cross legged, knees touching.  
 “The Giver,” Ellie reads.
“It’s a good one,” you tell her. “It’s about a boy with a job he doesn’t want but was born for. He kinda discovers what good and evil is and if you can have one without the other. I’m doing a shitty job of summarizing it, but it’s a really good book from what I remember.”
“Sounds good,” Ellie murmurs. She tilts her head to read the first page and at this distance you notice the kinks and knots at the back of her ponytail. 
"When's the last time you brushed your hair?" You chide gently. Ellie ducks her head and shrugs. 
“Dunno.”
You swivel in spot on the couch, facing the other end and pat the blanket in front of you in invitation.
"Grab a brush. You read, I'll de-tangle," you offer. She pauses, thinking about your offer before she rushes to the bathroom, returning moments later with a harried looking comb. You raise a brow at this and she laughs.
“S’all I’ve got.”
She clamors up, facing away from you with the book in her lap. She begins reading, tripping over the odd word. 
"Instantly, obediently, Jonas had dropped his bike on its side on the path behind his family’s dwelling. He had run indoors and stayed there, alone."
Her voice is steady and she plays with the edge of the pages as she reads. 
"Lily looked up, her eyes wide. “The Ceremony of Twelve,” she whispered in an awed voice. Even the smallest children Lily’s age and younger -knew that it lay in the future for each of them."
You find the sensation of being read to and brushing the girls knotted hair to be strangely soothing. 
"Your hair is such a beautiful color" you say before she begins on the next chapter, seeing the way the colors shine in the sunlight. 
Ellie doesn't answer and you wonder if she's embarrassed by the compliment. Teenagers are never known for loving extra unwanted attention. 
Brushing the dark strands of Ellie's you’re struck by how tense the girl is, like a trapped animal. Her shoulders are practically up to her ears. As if she isn't familiar with the sensation of a kindly touch. 
"Did your mom never do this for you?"
Even though she's facing away you can see the way Ellie's head tips forward, her eyes downcast. 
"Never had a mom." 
Your eyes shut momentarily as you chastise your own thoughtless stupidity. You don’t attempt to further this topic. For now you're content just to brush the girl's hair, smiling as Ellie relaxes with every stroke. 
“I wonder if Sarah ever read this,” she mutters to herself as she begins the next chapter. You smooth a section of her hair, taking in the name.  
"Who's Sarah?"
"Joel’s daughter," Ellie confides, her eyes on the paper in front of her. "She died on outbreak day."
You surmise that Ellie's so invested in the book that she doesn't even realize what she's saying or to whom.
You remember Maria telling you something of that during your visit with her. It makes your heart clench, thinking of the loss. Before you can stop yourself you’re probing for more information.
“How old was she?”
“Not old. Younger than me I think.”
A child.
You can’t imagine the pain that would create in someone. In all your experiences with Joel it was easy to forget that he had a past. Something that twisted him into the person that he is today.  Even after Maria told you he’d lost a daughter you’d overlooked it, content on hating him for his changeable moods as if he had no motivation.
But you’ve lost as well, a voice reminds you. And you haven’t resorted to cruelty.
“Maria mentioned a soldier,” you pause, trying to work the comb through a particularly tricky knot.  Ellie is quiet for a few moments as she reads the page she’s on, speaking only when she flips it over.
"Yeah, Joel was carrying Sarah. I think she broke her ankle or something. He was escaping a clicker. Soldier shot it, so Joel thought they were safe but they thought Sarah and him were infected because there were covered in blood." 
Your stomach drops as you imagine a younger Joel carrying his daughter tightly in his arms, both terrified with her clinging to him. You’re quiet, not wanting to ask anymore. Already it feels like you’ve overstepped, learned too much about him.
"Joel told the soldier they were okay, not infected. But the soldier shot anyway. Clipped Joel, got Sarah bad."
You feel a wave of nausea hitting you. The thought of losing a child that way makes you physically ill. Your loss hurts so acutely even now, you can't imagine that kind of pain compounded by losing a piece you brought into existence. 
“Joel told you all of this?”
“Nah, Maria did,” Ellie replies. “Joel talks with me a little bit about Sarah. Stuff she liked, TV shows and books and stuff. But not about how she died.”
It’s wrong of you to have pushed for more information. Especially since you and Joel are the furthest thing from friends.
"He blames himself for it," Ellie continues, fingers sliding between the pages of the book to turn to the next chapter. "Even though it was a soldier who shot at them. How can Joel blame himself for that?"
She approaches this topic almost naive. You've stopped brushing altogether; you can only stare down at the back of Ellie’s head blinking slowly.  
"He seems like the kind of guy who's built to protect people," you offer gently. 
"But he was unarmed. How's any of what happened his fault?"
"I don't know," you offer quietly. "Maybe he-"
"What the fuck are you two talkin' about?"
Neither of you heard Joel come in the garage, but he obviously heard enough of your conversation because he looks completely furious. He's a tall man with broad shoulders and the sight of him wild-eyed and fists curled makes you physically startle. 
"Joel-" Ellie starts her face blanching. 
"I said what are you two talkin' about?" His voice is icy, and takes you both by surprise
"Uh…We..." The open ire on his face makes you stumble over your words. You feel embarrassed at having been caught talking about him, you feel terrified at the vitriol in his eyes. 
Your stunned reaction is all the confirmation he needs. 
"Get out," Joel mumbles, his dark eyes sailing from you to Ellie. "And you? We need to talk." 
Ellie is never afraid of Joel, not that you've seen. But when you look to her now you see her wince at the knowledge that she's overstepped.  
Something in you forgets your own fear and you raise a hand in his direction, as if he's a wild animal you're attempting to tame. 
"Joel, it's-" you try to interject, to hold back the fury that's crackling through the room. But instead he turns his cold gaze to you, his sharp jaw ticking. 
"Get the fuck out now."
And you know that you have to leave. This isn't your place. Ellie isn't your daughter, Joel isn't your husband. This is basically a stranger's home. 
"I'm sorry."
You shoot Ellie a sympathetic look but she's just staring at with rounded eyes. You can't help but stop at her side, your voice a soft murmur. "He won't hurt you will he?"
Ellie's eyes snap to yours with a mixture of shock and horror. 
"Joel would never hurt me," Ellie explains before Joel has time to react to your question. "He's about the only one who never has."
The emphatic nature of her reply surprises you into taking a step backwards. A quick look over your shoulder at Joel tells you that his anger is dwindling at her words. You nod once more in Ellie's direction and then you slip by Joel to exit. 
You’re just turning off Rancher Street when the tears begin to slip down your cheeks. They drip onto the collar of your jacket and they don’t stop until you close the door to your home behind you.
--------------------------
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oracle-of-dream · 1 month
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Could you write a dom! top! taehyun x dom! bot! male reader where althought the reader tries to fight for dominance he ends loosing and getting roughly tamed by taehyun as a punishment? A setting where taehyun is back sweating from his gym session would probably make the plot even better!
We're Even
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Minors DNI
Summary: Taehyun is irresistible and doesn't even know how it affects you as he walks around half-naked. You end up mixing with some of his clothes mixed in with your laundry, and he catches you closely "examining" them.
Warnings: Male Reader, Gym ray Taehyun, Blowjob, Forced Deepthroat, Gagging, Creampie, Rough Sex, Overstimulation, Light Biting, Underwear Stealing, Olfactophilia (Smelling Kink)
Wordcount: 2.3k
There was a soft knock at your door that woke you up from your nap. "Come in," you groaned as you rubbed your eyes.
The door opened to reveal Taehyun, hair dripping, pecs soaked, and half naked with a towel around his waist. "Hey, y/n, I'm gonna head out soon. Did you want me to get you anything?"
You tried to look at him, but there was nowhere that was respectful. His muscular arms, beautiful chest, and happy trail led downward toward the towel where you could make out a bulge between the folds of fabric. "Um, I can't think of anything right now, I'll text if I think of something." Taehyun nodded as he left, pulling the door closed. You wished you'd snapped a picture to look at him again. You were rock hard already with just a quick look at him. You'd been living with Taehyun for almost a year now. You thought he was cute when you met him, but as soon as he got comfortable around you he was fine showing you how much of a man he was. Flaunting his body as he watched TV shirtless, flexing in the mirror with the bathroom door open, what killed you most of all was when he would touch you. When he touched you, he was so gentle like he was scared to hurt you.
You were snapped out of your daydreaming as Taehyun's voice was at your door again. "I'm gonna go to the gym, I'll be back later. Don't forget about your clothes in the dryer, I want to wash my clothes when I get back." You heard the front door open and close behind Taehyun, leaving you alone in your shared space.
Sitting in your room, lying on the bed, you groaned as you rolled off the bed and shuffled into the laundry room. It was better to get it out of the way now. The room was warm from the dryer, which finished its cycle. You placed your basket at the mouth of the dryer and opened it, letting the warm bundle fall. After emptying the dryer, shifting the ones in the washer into the dryer, and bringing your dry clothes into your room, you spilled your basket onto your bed to start folding and hanging them up. While sorting, you noticed a pair of underwear and a muscle shirt. all of which weren't yours. They must be Taehyun's, somehow getting mixed in with your clothes. You picked them up to take them to his room, catching a whiff of his scent.
It smelled light, clean, and maybe a hint of lavender. Taehyun's detergent that he liked... You looked at the clothes in your hand again, and the urge to bring them closer to your face took over. Your nose met the fabric as you breathed in, smelling your roommate's scent. You're not a bad person. Your roommate, Taehyun, must've forgotten to take his stuff out and you mixed his clothes with yours. He was out at the gym for at least another two hours. Why did that matter? You threw the clothes onto the bed but instantly wanted to smell them again. It would be okay. Just one more, then put the clothes back. He wouldn't even know... You steeled yourself as you lay on your bed, holding his clothes to your face as you breathed Taehyun. Your cock was harder than before, probably leaking at this point, thinking about Taehyun. Thinking about if Taehyun were in your arms, holding you.
Your body moved on its own, sliding your pants down enough for your cock to slip free. Slowly, stroking yourself as you sniffed your roommate's clothes. You felt filthy, gross, and ashamed. It was amazing, tingly, and so good. You wrapped Taehyun's shirt around your hand as you jerk yourself off with it, and smelled his underwear.
His smell was intoxicating. You needed more...
You hid his clothes in your drawer, folded neatly under your clothes. Then you crept into Taehyun's room, opening his closet and digging into his dirty clothes. These clothes were better, and the smell was heavier. His sweat–a heavy musk stuck to his clothes, the strongest on his gym clothes. You stole the clothes, ran back to your room, and closed your door behind you. The material of his shirt was so soft, and the smell of his used underwear made your eyes roll. You fisted your cock so fast it burned slightly, but it was all so amazing! It was so amazing that you couldn't hear the front door. Or footsteps. Or a soft knock at your door before it softly opened.
Taehyun walked in to see you cumming all over yourself; his shirt around your cock, his underwear shoved into your face, and your blissed-out expression that turned to fear as you noticed him.
"Tae–" You scrambled to cover yourself, throwing his clothes behind you. "It's not what you think. I–It was just..." You gave up trying to explain as you felt the reality of the situation on you. Taehyun's expression was a mix of surprise and blankness. You couldn't tell what he was thinking but knew it wouldn't be good.
"...I," Taehyun started but shut his mouth. He turned, closed your door, and felt you sitting in your guilt.
You threw back on your clothes and ran to his room, knocking rapidly. "Taehyun, please, let's talk about this." The door opened, and Taehyun stood in the doorway with the same expression.
"What's there to talk about?"
"I want to try and talk about what you saw."
"I know what I saw. You know what you did. Let's leave it." He tried to close the door, but you pushed your way into his room. "Y/n, don't do this," Taehyun warned.
"Just let me speak! Please," Your voice wavered. Taehyun didn't want to hear you as he tried to push you back toward the door. "Tae–" You pushed against him, taking the both of you to the floor with you on top of him. The two of you wrestled for control. You don't even know what you'd do when you got him to hold still, but he had to listen. You couldn't let it sit. You managed to lift a leg around him and flip him under you, pinning his arms to the sides of his head as you sat on his lap.
"Is this what you want!?" He shouted.
You flinched. "No! I made a huge mistake, and I'm sorry! I regret doing that, I wasn't thinking straight." Your hands tightened around his wrists as he resisted you.
"That doesn't mean you didn't enjoy it, right?"
You lowered your head as he stared at you. "I did enjoy it... It smelled really good, but I know I shouldn't have done it.
"Smelled good?" His voice was full of disgust. "You wanted to smell me?"
"It was an accident at first. Our clothes got mixed up, I ended up smelling them, and it spiraled from there."
Taehyun managed to twist his leg to push you off him. He grabbed you by the hair and forced you into his armpit. "This is what you wanted?"
You instantly smelled his armpit, the smell had deodorant with an undertone of sweat. Your cock was already getting hard again, even when you tried to hold it in. "Taehyun, what are you doing!?"
"Giving you what you wanted. Since you were okay enough smelling my clothes, I'm sure you don't mind getting the smell from the source." Taehyun pushed you more, making his pit touch your nose, giving you no choice but to breathe him in. "Look at you, you're not even trying to fight back. You're hard as a rock. Sure, look sorry to me." Your tongue darted out and licked his armpit, this chemical taste of deodorant coating your tongue. The taste was horrible, but the feeling of having licked his skin made yours jump. Taehyun pushed you away from him, wiping the wetness on his underarms. "You licked me!? You're such a weirdo!"
"I–" You tried to find the words to make things less bad, but there weren't any. "I am a weirdo. I'm a freak. I'm a loser that loves your body, Taehyun." Your face burned as you spoke, "I know we can't go the way things were, so do whatever you need to. Tell me what I need to do to make things even. I'll stay out of your way, stop talking to you, even move out if you want." You were on your knees, looking up at him as you begged for a second chance.
Taehyun looked down at you with an exasperated look. "You want to be even. Fine." He started untying the drawstring on his sweatpants, pushing them down to reveal he'd been commando. His cock was hard, pointing at you angrily. "Make it even. Take care of me. Wherever I am, whenever I want." You couldn't believe your eyes or ears. Taehyun's cock was out in front of you, and you were being told to suck it? Your hesitation made Taehyun impatient as he stepped forward and pulled your hair, making you yelp. "Yes, or no? If you say Yes, we can find a way past this. No, means you can move the hell out."
You nodded quickly. "Y-Yes! I pick yes!"
Taehyun's face had a tint of pink in his tan cheeks as he looked down at you, his cock covering some of your face in the most disgustingly sexy way. "Then, start working," He commanded. You wrapped your hands around his cock, making Taehyun hiss as you stroked him. "M-More," His voice wasn't as stern, more embarrassed. He wrapped his hand around yours, moving you the way he wanted it as he looked around. He tried looking down at you, but every time he saw you looking at him–which made him too embarrassed to hold your gaze. When you started getting the strokes on your own, his hands moved to your shoulders as he held you for balance. "It's good, really good. I want your mouth too." Your mouth watered at the thought, your brain already buzzing into a cock-drunk haze. You wrapped your lips around his cock, tongue eager to explore him. His smell was strongest here, which only made you work harder. His tip was extremely sensitive, every time you sucked on it Taehyun would lose it. "No fucking teasing. Go deeper already," He commanded through gritted teeth. You were so focused that you couldn't hear him, attacking his sensitive spot as his whole body twitched and convulsed. You felt his hand clamp down on your head and force you to take him completely, making you choke. Taehyun didn't let you go, holding you there as he tried to calm down from your sudden attack. He only let you go when you tapped his thigh rapidly.
You ripped yourself off his length, coughing. "You choked me!"
"You weren't listening. If you don't listen, then you'll get punished more. So try using your head–not that it's good for anything other than being a dirty freak anyway." Taehyun pushed you onto your back, yanking at your pants until he managed to tear them away from your body. "Flip the hell over," He ordered as you heard him stroking his cock. You flipped onto your stomach, waiting for what you knew was coming next. "C-Can–Is this okay?" Taehyun's voice was back to his sweet and softer side.
You looked back to see the earlier irritation fading, he looked genuine in his question. Even when hate-fucking you, he still cared enough about you. You nodded, "I want this. And I already said I'd do this to make us even."
Taehyun smirked as he lined himself up at your hole. "Then, I don't want to hear any crying later." He pushed into you, forcing your unprepared walls apart painfully. Taehyun was kind and patient with you, waiting for you to signal it was okay to continue. When you moved your hips back into him, arching your back, Taehyun got your signal. He held himself over you as if he were doing push-ups and moved his hips forward, slamming into you. Your eyes rolled back at the sudden rush of sensation, and Taehyun didn't stop or slow down as he went to town on your body. He fucked you hard. The sound of skin slapping and your moaning sounded through the apartment. You could feel Taehyun's sweat dripping onto your back as he kept up his impossible speed. It must've been his unused stamina from skipping the gym because Taehyun fucked you like that for almost fifteen minutes without finishing.
You were crying, having finished twice already. "Please, Tae. No more..."
"Not yet, we're done when I say so," Taehyun said between breaths. His pace that he'd kept up started to slip, his rhythm was messy and his thrust focused more on power rather than speed. He was reaching his end... You bit your hand as Taehyun slammed into you, and he finally hit his first orgasm with a loud groan. "That's it, freaky boy, here's what you've been waiting on." There was so much cum, you could feel it overflowing out of your whole while Taehyun's cock filled any empty space with more. He collapsed on top of you, putting his cock as deep as possible inside you as he rested his head in the crook of your neck.
Your body was stiff, your back hurt, and your ass was definitely going to feel that for a few days. "So, we're even now?"
Taehyun chuckled. "Not by a long shot. I'll take it easy on you today, but maybe you'll be my new cardio workout for a while." You groaned at the thought as Taehyun kissed your neck comfortingly...
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anangelwhodidntfall · 8 months
Text
Weighted Blanket: Simon Riley 
Call Of Duty Masterlist
word count: 840
description: Simon becomes your personal weighted blanket
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Simon was wide awake as he usually was since he didn't sleep much, but for him to see you awake at this hour had him concerned. He walked into the kitchen planning to make some tea when he saw you curled up on the couch reading a book with your headphones in until you guys locked eyes. You watched him walk into the kitchen and heard him start making tea, so you pulled off your headphones and marked your book already knowing he was gonna question you on why you're awake. A few minutes later, he walks in and with two cups handing you one, before taking a seat on the table that was in front of the couch. 
"Thank you." You said as he handed you a cup.
"Why are you up sunshine? It's 2 in the morning, you should be sleeping." He said as he took a sip of drink. 
"I couldn't sleep. I thought maybe if I read some it would help me fall asleep but it hasn't." You said looking at him. 
"Why can't you sleep? Usually at any given point of the day, you can be found napping." He asked concerned. 
You smiled a bit knowing it was true that at any point of the day no matter what you were doing or who you were with which was mostly Simon, you could be found napping which heard you the nickname sleepy. But now you were scared to admit to Simon of all people that you couldn't sleep all because you didn't have your weighted blanket which helped you sleep. 
"Sunshine?" He asked snapping you out of your thoughts. 
"It's stupid really." You said shaking your head until you felt him place his hands on yours. 
"It's not stupid if it concerns you. Please tell me?" He asked as his brown eyes stared into yours like they would reveal something. 
"I usually sleep with a weighted blanket and I have to order a new one since the one I was used ripped." You said. 
Simon nodded he knew why people used weighted blankets but didn't question you further of why you slept with one. He also knew that more than not especially on long missions, you fell asleep on him and could sleep next to him with ease, which gave him an idea. 
"You could sleep with me, like share a bed with me unless you are uncomfortable." He said as you stared at him. 
"Si...I couldn't possibly do that." You said knowing that he wasn't a touchy person. 
"I know how hard it is Sunshine to not be able to sleep, plus I wouldn't have offered if I was uncomfortable." He said. 
"Are you Simon?" You asked him. 
"I'm sure, plus I think all those times you fall asleep on me should account for something." He said with a smile.
"Okay I'm willing to try as long as you promise to tell me if you become uncomfortable at all." You said as the two of you stood up. 
"I could never be uncomfortable with you Sunshine." He said as you two headed to your room. 
You set your stuff on your nightstand, before climbing into your bed watching as Simon climbed into his spot before gently wrapping an arm around you and pulling you close to him. You two made small talk while you started to feel yourself get sleepy. 
"Get some rest love, I'm not going anywhere." He said rubbing his hand up and down your back. 
"Thank you Simon for taking care of me." You said before sleep over came you. 
"I'll always care for you Sunshine." He said with a small smile watching as your breathing evened out. 
*BONUS*
A few days later you came back from a meeting with Price and found a box sitting on your bed making you a little confused since you didn't order anything. You opened the box and saw a weighted blanket with skulls all over it which made you smile having a feeling you knew who it was from until a note fell at your feet. 
"Figured you should have one in case im not with you, but I won't say no to being your weighted blanket again. Anytime you need sleep whether you have this or not, you know where to find me." -Simon. 
You were still smiling from reading his note that you almost didn't hear him come in until he spoke.
"So did I do good? I've never bought one before and there's so many options for these things now." He said. 
You set the note and blanket on the bed before turning and wrapping your arms around him before placing a kiss on his clothed cheek. 
"It's perfect, thank you Simon." You said looking at him with a smile.
Simon was thankful he had his mask on and that you couldn't see how much your simple act had affected him. He felt his cheeks grow warm and swore he never wash his mask again after you kissed his cheek. 
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obsessedwrhys · 1 month
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Aesthete
(adj.) Someone with a deep sensitivity to the beauty of art or nature
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ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 .ᐟ where Abby let's you draw a portrait of her
c/w: fluff, reader is female because I refuse to believe she's straight 😡, abby being insecure (?), gun talk, some cursing, just two lesbos bickering like a married couple, kissing, did not proof read this!!
ᯓ★
Inside your shared room, you somehow found yourself painting on another canvas after just telling yourself you'd be done with your last one. Since you were a kid, you've always been drawn towards anything that had to do with brushes and colours. It was better spending your time painting rather than talking to people, they were always rude or just straight off insensitive. All except for someone...
Abby...
She always adored your skills. Everytime you were assigned to go on patrols together, she would just peek her head from behind your shoulder to see what you were doodling in your journal. Out of everyone you knew, she was the one constantly bragging about your drawings to her friends. And you guys aren't even dating!!
Yet... which you always liked to tell yourself.
With your brush applying another soft stroke on the canvas, you started to grow bored of it, another idea already crawling up from the back of your mind. Maybe you could try doing a portrait, you have the experience but you just don't have the subject. Almost out of instinct, you knew who to find. Pretty much the only person you'd figure would be fine with this.
Abandoning your brush and pallette on the round chair, you decided to leave and try to find Abby. It wasn't hard to find her since she would spend almost all of her time in the gym. Swinging open the glass door, you headed in and walked past several other WLFs who were also training, your eyes glued to one person.
There she was, doing bench presses as usual.
You decided to stop a few feet away from where she was, almost like you were in a trance from watching her biceps flex each time she lifted the heavy weight. Not wanting to be seen as a creep, which you already have, you walked closer to make your presence known. "Hey Abby" You said with a smile. Your voice startling her a bit.
"Oh, hey" She said before setting the weight back to its rightful place. She sits up on the bench as she looks at you with a friendly smile. "You need anything?" She said, always kind and polite towards you that it somehow made you feel all giddy inside.
"I was wondering if you'd liked to be the subject of a portrait I'm doing" You said and your words struck her a bit. She looked like she just received news of something big. "Uhh... if you're worried about the portrait turning out ugly, I promise I'll be extra focused on the details" You said, figuring if that was the reason behind her reaction.
"Huh? Ah no, I wasn't worried about that. I'm just surprised you'd pick me" She chuckles awkwardly as she stands up, her height scaring you a bit. "Did you expect me to pick someone else?" You asked, the two of you walking side by side.
"Well... maybe I figured you'd choose someone more... elegant" She said, holding the door open for you to go first. "Elegant?" You scoff out of amusement.
"Didn't you show me one of your books? Where all of the people drawn were wearing those tight dresses and having their hair up so high" Abby said, recalling the memory.
"Pssh, that's different, trust me, I know what I'm doing" You opened the door to your room, inviting her inside.
"Whatever you say" She responded with a playful smile. Once you closed the door, her eyes were already examining around the room that's messy from all of your art stuff.
"Seems like you didn't take my advice" She said, looking at the stack of books you had thrown along with the pile of discontinued drawings.
"I'll do that later" You said dismissively since you realised everytime you cleaned your supplies, you were always gonna use it and make a mess anyways, best to save it for a day where you have the energy to clean.
"Soo uhh... what do I...?" Abby walks over to where you're busy setting a brand new canvas.
"You can just sit at the sofa so you can be right in front of me" You said, putting everything in place and she just does what you instructed. She finds herself seated in front of you and it somehow made her shy. Does she pose or...? This is all new to her.
"You can move your body around a bit, just try not to move your head a lot, so uh... relax" You said, already picking up your brush. "Got it" She said as she leans back onto the cushion.
With your focus on the portrait, you failed to notice the way she was watching you, her gaze was full of warmth and admiration. She was eyeing your every move as if she was watching a film.
"I never got to ask, how did you learn to paint?" Abby said and it made you stop in your act to think it over. "Can't remember exactly when, I just knew it was fun to do so I kept doing it" You simply responded and she smiles softly at your answer. "Fun huh? Is that why you're doing a portrait of me?" She said and her playful tone made you almost freeze in place.
"I guess you could say that" You said, your hand carefully doing the shades of her face. The room remained quiet for a moment, just faint sounds of your brush mixing together different colours on your pallete. "Can you lift your head up a bit?" You asked and she does just that. "Perfect" You said and quickly press your brush back on the canvas.
Your eagerness had her struggle to contain a smile. "If only you were this passionate about your gun training" She said since this was a topic that you could care less about.
"I don’t really like guns, it's too violent for me"
"True... but its also the reason why you're still alive. C'mon, at least fix your aim" She said which had you turn to look at her.
"Whats wrong with my aim?"
"Errr..." She trails off, struggling to find the right words but you were well aware of what she was trying to say. "Just try not to have your bullets flying everywhere" She said, her response having you raise an eyebrow at her.
"... don't make me draw a hairy moustache on you" You threatened which had her laugh.
"Am I supposed to find that scary?" She asked to which you pointed the end of your paintbrush at her to warn her to be careful of her next words. This action just encouraging her even more but for her sake of not wanting a horrendous looking moustache on her portrait, she'll stop.
After a while, she let's out a soft sigh. "Getting tired?" You asked, your face hidden by the canvas so she couldn't see you.
"A bit" She admitted with an embarrassed chuckle. Your head peaks from the side of canvas, trying to mimic the sweat that was still present on her forehead due to her earlier workout.
Without even realising, you were basically staring at her face a little too hard. It was funnier from Abby's perspective cause all she could see was your pair of eyes staring at her so intensely. "Am I too far away? You're looking pretty hard" She joked, pointing out how your brows were slightly narrowed.
You ended up shushing her which she found amusing. "I'm thinking, don't disrupt my thoughts" You said.
"Yes ma'am"
After a couple of minutes, you managed to finish the portrait, just a few details here and there then you were finally satisfied with yourself. "You can get up now" You said as you carefully added some tiny dots or lines. Abby pushed herself off the sofa and stood beside you.
"Damn" She said, blown away by the portrait you had done of her. It was like a reflection in a mirror. "What are you gonna do with it?" Abby asked as you stepped back to finally admire your work. "I don't know... maybe I'll hang it up somewhere in my room" You said. This caught her interest almost immediately. "You want a portrait of me in your room?" She asked, seeming embarrassed.
"Well do you want it in your room?" You asked which made her go silent.
"It's fine, I really don't mind, you'd be surprised by how many scary things I've painted and displayed on my walls" You said, carefully picking up the canvas and moving it to the other side of the room. Abby simply follows you with her arms folded.
"Comparing my face to scary things doesn't make it sound any better" She said and you could sense a tiny hint of frustration in her tone which had you chuckle to yourself. "Stop being a baby and help me hang this up" You said after finding a open spot on the wall to put it.
"You.are.unbelievable" She shakes her head slightly with a defeated smile as she takes the canvas from your hand before standing on the chair to hang it on to the nail.
Once she was done, she stepped down from the chair to stand beside you. The two of you now staring at the portrait.
"I have to admit, you're really gifted" Abby said and it made you turn your head to look at her. "Thanks" You smiled at her compliment. The second she turns to look at you, you felt yourself melt at her stare as if her blue eyes were hypnotising you. You swore for a second you could see hearts popping up around her.
Why is she looking at you like that?
Like you're the single most beautiful thing she has ever seen
"If you uh don't mind... could I stay for a while?" She asked, her voice so soft it was intoxicating.
"Sure" You blurted out without even thinking twice.
Noticing how flustered you looked, Abby tilts her head with a grin. "You okay?" She asked but her tone was anything but concern, it was like she was teasing you, knowing the effect she had on you.
"Yeahh, I'm good" You turned around and began walking back to your supplies, feeling as though you needed to escape her presence quickly to be able to think straight.
"Are you sure? Cause you looked like you wanted to kiss me just now" She said and it stopped you from reaching out to your brushes. Your mind was short circuiting.
Fuck this woman...
"And what if I said I wanted to?" You managed to say since it was easier that you weren't looking at her.
Suddenly you could hear her footsteps approaching you from behind, almost like each step she took added a weight in your chest. The tension on you shoulders relaxed the moment you felt her hands placed on them, gently, she turned you around to have you face her.
"Then kiss me" She said, no, pleaded. Her face showing how much she also wanted this.
You leaned in closer to her, the two of you haven't even kissed yet but just from the feeling of your chests pressed together made you both breathless. Eventually you pressed your lips on hers, taking it slow as you wanted to savour this moment, but it didn't last long as the desperation started to grew.
Within seconds, you were kissing Abby hard and she did the same, her hand wrapped around the back of your neck while the other is placed on your hip. The kiss was messy. Your hands grabbing at whatever you could on her body as you were completely lost in the taste of her.
Your touch was driving her crazy as well, thinking back to the countless nights of how she much she wanted this. To have you this close, to have you melt just from her lips. Out of breath and feeling tired, you pulled away but Abby didn't let you and quickly pulled you back in for another kiss. Her action causing you to yelp and for a sec she felt her stomach flip. She chuckles.
"So pretty" She muttered before pressing her lips back on yours again and again, not wanting the moment to end.
"Abby..." You laid your hands on her arms and she pulled back to admire you. The mess she had made of you.
"Yes...?" She said, gently caressing your face.
"You keep kissing me and I'm gonna pass out" You said and your words had her chuckle softly.
"Sorry, can't help it when your lips are so sweet" She said, her thumb rubbing on your cheek affectionately.
"Did you think this would happen when you asked me to come over?" She asks.
"Ummm... maybe?" You said. You had a feeling something might happen but you never thought it'd turn out like this.
"I've just liked you for a very long time but I wasn't sure you felt the same" You confessed and her smile grew wider.
"Seriously? What, was me bragging about you to everyone not obvious enough? Should I have been starting a fan club for you so you'd find out better?" She teased and you smacked her on the shoulder playfully.
"Maybe you should, then I'd know that you actually liked me" She sighs, pretending to act like she's regretting this missed opportunity.
"You're right. Maybe if I did start a massive fan club dedicated to you, we would of had this kiss sooner" She said, leaning in closer to have her forehead rested on yours.
"Well we're here now aren't we?" You looked up at her, a smirk on your face.
"True" She then started to move and you couldn't help but let your eyes flutter close, waiting for her to kiss you again but somehow the feeling of her lips on yours never came.
You opened your eyes and found her actually moving her lips inches away from your ears instead. "How about we clean your room now, hm?" She said which had you in disbelief. She was now reminding you of how dirty your room is after just kissing you.
"If tidying up my things is so much fun then sure" You moved away from her but she was quick to follow you.
"If I get to spend more time with you, I don't see anything boring about it" Abby said, already on to arrange your stack of unorganised books. You watch her with a look of gratitude, knowing this mess is gonna take a very long time to clean.
"Thanks Abs"
"You can thank me with a kiss after we're done" She shoot you a cheeky smile which had you roll your eyes with the corner of your lips curving upwards.
"Fine" You stood beside her to help with putting your books in order. Seeing how focused you were, Abby couldn't help but have her hip nudging yours on purpose to get your attention. You chuckle, knowing this cleaning session is gonna take a while.
(Now I'm gonna do super duper angst Ellie, this plot has been stuck on my mind 😄)
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thisapplepielife · 2 months
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Written for the @steddiemicrofic April challenge.
All Alone
April Prompt: Fool | Word Count: 454 | Rating: T | CW: Fear of Mortality, Prior Parental Loss, Prior (Unnamed) Health Problem, Anxiety | Tags: Eddie POV, Established Relationship, Long-Term Relationship, Steve Harrington and His High EQ, Beloved Wayne Munson, Everybody Lives, Happy Ending
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The overhead light in the bedroom flickers on, and Eddie buries his head deeper into the pile of pillows on the bed. 
He's not getting up. 
"Eddie," Steve says, gently. Quietly. 
"I'm fine," Eddie mutters from under the linens, but he's sure he's not very convincing. 
"The hospital called," Steve says, and Eddie's whole body tenses with blinding, overwhelming fear. "Wayne can go home tomorrow. After lunch." 
And it's good news. Something to celebrate. But something catches in his throat and he chokes out a sound, somewhere between a whine and a cry. 
He's a grown man, unable to get out of bed, and he feels like a fool. 
"He's fine," Steve says softly, sitting down on the bed, rubbing Eddie's back. 
Sure, Wayne's fine. For now. But someday he won't be. Someday Eddie will be all alone, and the weight of that knowledge suffocates him. The fear of it. The inevitability. 
His mom is dead. His dad is dead. He has no siblings. Grandparents, all dead. He has Wayne. That's it. That's all that's left of his family. Wayne, the only connection left to his childhood. 
Wayne, keeper of the memories, answerer of the questions. 
"Hey, remember when…"
And Wayne will remember. 
"And what was…?"
And Wayne will know. 
But Wayne will go someday, and he'll take those secrets with him. 
Then, Eddie will have no family left. 
"Eddie," Steve says, "talk to me." 
And he can't. 
He can't tell Steve, the love of his goddamn life, his family, this. Steve is his family. He is. They've chosen each other. Over and over, year after year. 
Steve's his future.
But he's not his past. Not his beginnings, even as fucking rough as they might have been, more often than not. 
"Honey, he's okay. I promise," Steve says gently. 
It's foolish, this preemptive mourning. This wallowing. 
"Wayne's gonna die someday, and I'll be all alone," Eddie chokes out, and he hopes Steve doesn't take it the wrong way. 
He doesn't. 
"I know how scary that is," Steve says, and Eddie relaxes. Steve probably does know. He's an only child, too. With only his mom left, now. It's scary.
Maybe they can be scared together.
A week later, Wayne's on the couch, recovering, and Eddie is buzzing around the room.
Steve's sitting right next to Wayne, notebook in hand. Taking extensive notes. An oral history. 
Steve won't ever have been there, but he'll have Wayne's own words to reference. 
"...and the little fool thought he could drive my car. Couldn't even reach the pedals. Rolled it right into the shed," Wayne says, and Steve laughs.
Eddie had forgotten that. 
And Eddie smiles, standing in the kitchen, listening to his past share secrets with his future.
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If you want to write your own, or see more entries for this challenge, pop on over to @steddiemicrofic and follow along with the fun! ❤️
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russellsppttemplates · 8 months
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One step at a time (Charles Leclerc)
A scare pushes your family even closer and, fortunately, it all turns well
Note: english is not my first language. I've had these requests in my inbox for a really long time, and I've debated on if and how I should write them, because it is a sensitive topic that I feel huge respect about and I hope I have written it in a respectful way. In a way, this is based in stories I've heard, so I hope it is a good depiction as I'm not a doctor nor someone who has experienced this.
Thank you so much to everyone who likes and reblogs, your feedback is appreciated 🤍 and I'm taking requests so if you have any ideas or concepts you want to share, feel free to do so as I'll try to get to them the best I can!
my masterlist
Tw: depicts a potential pregnancy loss for the reader (mentions pain, cramping, anxiety, blood, hospitals)
"Do you have his bag, Charles?", you asked your husband, looking around Hervé's room for his cardigan, "yes, I have it here!", he said back to you from the kitchen. Charles had a full afternoon with meetings and you happened to be needed presently at your office just the day that Hervé's pre-school had an unexpected problem with the electricity and that they wouldn't be able to keep the kids for today. Luckily, Pascale had the day off from her salon, so it was only a couple of minutes of you and Charles running around like headless chickens before you realised the small issue had a solution.
"Ready to go to grand-mère, my love?", you called for your son, helping him put the soft piece on before he grabbed his backpack, "have a good day, buddy! Give grand-mère a big kiss for me, okay?", Charles noted, kissing the top of his son's head and getting up to face you, "and you too, amour, have a good day", he kisser your lips.
Grabbing your bag and Hervé's hand, you saw Charles bend down to face your bump, "and you, little one, I hope you have a good day too, no messing around, okay?", he gently caressed your small baby bump. To anyone else, you probably looked bloated, but Charles couldn't help himself anytime he was near you. After all, you were once again making one of his dreams come true and he wanted to love on you as much as he could, especially when this time around, morning sickness was more of an all day thing.
"Have a good day too, handsome. I'll see you later!", you headed out of the door first, helping your son into his car seat before safely strapping him in and getting on the driver's seat.
Arriving at Pascale's, you knocked on her door and she quickly answered it, "hello, mon petit! Are we going to have a big adventure today?", she laughed at her grandson's excitement upon seeing her, "again, thank you so much, Pascale, you're our saviour", you thanked, kissing her cheek as you bid them goodbye, "be good for grand-mère, okay my love?", you ruffled Hervé's hair, kissing his forehead and helping him inside, "Can we bake a cake?", he asked his grandmother, "That's a lovely idea! To the kitchen we go! Have a good day, chérie!", she yelled, closing the door quickly with one hand as her other hand was being pulled to the kitchen.
The workload for the day wasn't a lot compared to most days, and the morning meetings had been quite okay, and for what felt like after a really long time, you had been able to keep your food down despite the cramps you felt. After all, food barely got that far on your system, so much so that your body was unsure of what to do.
The afternoon meeting was going at a slower pace because the matters in discussion required it, "but I think this would be better for all the patients that work until five. I won't the the one for all of those appointments, and maybe I can't assure the ones until eight or nine o'clock at night, but I know Emilia prefers the later hours", you turned to her, "yes, for me personally it's easier if I get here later and leave later, my daughter's school is flexible, and my wife can pick her up", she reasoned, "so, like this, we can get to more people", one of your other colleagues smiled, writing down the ideas so you could close another topic.
You adjusted your position on the chair, hoping to find one more comfortable when you felt something on your underwear, "did you just pee yourself, Y/N?", you mumbled to yourself, excusing yourself from the meeting so you could go to the bathroom.
Reaching the stall, you untucked your shirt from your pants and pulled them down, underwear included to see a red stain. That was not good, you thought, seeing that it wasn't some small skin knick from the elasticated fabric.
Trying to stay as calm as you could, you called for Emilia, "what's up? Do you need me to unfasten your bra again? I told you your boobs grew at least two cup size- oh", she stopped as soon as she saw your trembling lip, "what's wrong?", she wondered, "I'm bleeding, it's not a lot, but I don't think this is the spotting they say. Can you take me to the hospital, please?", you murmured, accepting her hand as she helped you out of the bathroom.
"You guys carry on with the meeting, okay? I need to take Y/N to the hospital to get checked out", Emilia announced to the room, receiving a million and one questions, "let us know if you need enything, okay?", Nora, one of your older colleagues said. Unlike the most of the team, Nora was already a grandmother and almost like a mother to everyone who worked with you, and she had been the one to tell you to take a pregnancy test, and now, to catch on what was happening, "Y/N", she called for you, seeing your scared face, "everything is going to be alright, yes? You're one of the strongest women I've ever met. I know its difficult, but try not to think the worst, okay. We love you and we are here for you", she smiled reassuringly, kissing your forehead.
Seeing Emilia leave the meeting room with your phone and wallet, "I have your documentation and your phone here, let's go", she calmly said, not wanting to add to the turmoil of emotions you were already feeling.
"I'll ruin your seats", you thought out loud once you got to her car, "here! Let me put this down", Emilia thought fast, grabbing what looked like her daughter's towell, "Laura said that she doesn't like it anyway", she tried to get your mind off and distract you as you sat down and she started driving, "claims it's not sparkly enough and it doesn't match her personality. Can you believe that? A towell doesn't match the personality of a five year old!", she smiled apologetically, "are you in pain?", she questioned, "just cramps, but very small ones, they're barely there if I don't pay attention honestly", you breathed out, "it's two minutes to the hospital", she checked.
Arriving at the hospital, the emergency room was packed and you looked around in a fret, knowing that it would be a while for someone to get to you. Emilia saw someone in scrubs and that was enough for her, "sorry, excuse us, doctor! My friend here is bleeding", she yelled through the room, hoping to catch his attention, "I feel it down my pants", you gulped as the effort you had been putting on not crying long gone as tears fell on your cheeks, "I'm a nurse, let me", he encouraged you as he bent down to carry you, placing one arm under your knees and one around your back as he walked as quickly as he could into the corridor, "pregnant woman, early thirties, bleeding in what could be a potential miscarriage!", he yelled, grabbing the attention of some of his colleagues as they took a good look at your situation, one of them grabbing a wheel chair and approaching you, "Hi, we are going to take care of you two, okay? I just need your ID", she soflty said as Emilia handed it to her, "now let's go and see what is happening here", the male nurse wheeled you to the room where they kept the emergency ultrasound, "there's a lot of blood", you mentioned, not enjoying the silence despite the rush around you, "Hi, Y/N, let's see, okay? Yu know this could be a-", the doctor who had just arrived began, "A miscarriage, I know, I- I can feel that I'm bleeding a lot", you whispered, "I'm going to examine you now", she informed, working up the machine and looking at the screen, "Oh, here they are", she pointed to the screen, urging one of the nurses to use the cardiac monitor so you could hear the baby's heartbeat, "this is your baby's heartbeat, Y/N. Your baby is here", she showed you. And it triggered you to cry a little bit more, looking at Emilia as she squeezed your hand.
"Still,", the doctor noted, cleaning up the device before she made room so the nurses would help with the rest, "this could mean two things: you could've had a placental abruption, and they tend to solve on their own with bed rest, but it could also be the start of a miscarriage. Medically, we can't tell them apart until it happens, there's no medication we can give you that can help, so I'd like to keep you for observation", she stated, earning your nod as you felt the nurses help you into a clean wheelchair, ready to take you up to a room.
After cleaning and freshening up as you could, you looked at the clock and gathered that it was time to call Charles, "I've texted the team to let them know how you were doing already", Emilia said as she handed you your phone, "thanks", you mumbled, taking a deep breath before hitting the call icon so you could speak to your husband, knowing his meeting was finished by now, "Hello, amour. I was just about to call you and ask if you wanted me to pick up Hervé", your husband said on the other end of the line, "Hi, actually, you might want to put that off. When I was at work, I noticed I was bleeding in my underwear, so Emilia took me to the hospital and they're keeping me for observation. But I heard the baby's heartbeat", you said all in one go, "are you feeling good?", you heard the strained tone of Charles' voice, "yes, but, I want you here", you gulped, "I'm on my way, mon amour. I love you, okay? I'll be there in a bit", Charles said before he dialed off the call.
"I'll be here until Charles gets here", Emilia pointed as she felt you were about to brush off the whole situation and tell her to go home, "besides, Laura would probably tell me that her backpack doesn't match her personality and, quite frankly, the day is not calling for it", she attempted to make you smile, smiling too when the corners of your lips lifted a little.
You must've have fallen asleep because you woke up with Charles' lips kissing your forehead, "hey", he called gently, "I'm already going, Y/N. I hope everything works out well", Emilia smiled as she blew you kiss, closing the door behind her.
Charles pulled the chair as close to your bed as possible, sitting down and holding your hand in his, "hi", you murmured, unsure of how to begin the conversation, "I'm glad you're here".
Your husband was quick however, "of course, my love. I texted my mum and she said she doesn't mind having Hervé spend a few days with her", he began, "and how are you feeling? What happened?", he asked gently.
You were explaining what happened, from the moment you left the meeting until the doctor examined when you heard a knock on the door, the nurse and doctor that had checked you in asking if they could check on you.
"This is Charles, my husband", you introduced, seeing him shake their hands, "thank you so much for what you've done while I wasn't here", he thanked them, waiting for them to continue and explain what had happened to you so he too could hear it.
"So now we just wait?", he questioned, "yes, unfortunately we don't have any other way to deal with this situation other than bed rest", she explained, "from the scans we did earlier, it seems like it's not a big situation, but I understand your worries and doubts. This is a worrisome situation, but we are doing everything we can to make sure your baby stays safe in your uterus", she smiled, looking at the CTG machine, "your baby looks comfortable, and their heartbeat is good, very strong", she allowed you to hear the sound, knowing it usually calms the parents a little bit to hear the noise, "the bleeding seems to have stopped to", the nurse conforted, too.
Your doctor was paged for an emergency, leaving you with the nurse that had initially helped you, "I wanted to thank you for what you did to my wife, I really appreciate it", Charles said, "my wife and I also had a scare like this, so I know how it is to be on the other side. Now we have a three year old boy that resembles a storm everywhere he goes. Just take this one step at a time. By the looks of it, you should be going home tomorrow", he said, "I'm sure it will be a little better to be at home rather than here", he excused himself.
.
After one last check-up, your doctor didn't see the need to keep you at the hospital since things were looking up, prescribing you bed rest for the foreseeable weeks.
"Here, amour, are you comfortable like this?", he asked, arranging the pillows on the sofa, "I am, thank you", you whispered, kissing his cheek when he sat next to you, "one step at a time, okay?", you reassured, "is your mother still bringing Hervé? Or do you need to go and pick him up?", you wondered.
"Mum texted me saying she would leave in a few minutes, so any minute now", he smiled, "I've sent an email to the team, and now that there's a break, they need me a little less so hopefully I'm home more often than I am not", Charles explained, hearing a knock on the door, "must be them".
Hervé was quick to run to greet you on the sofa, "Grand-mère said you were not feeling good, mama. Can I give you a kiss?", he asked, bring weary of approaching you, "it's okay, mon ange, I'm okay. You can sit here next to me", you smiled, opening your arms so he could cuddle your side, "I told him he needed to be careful now and that he should be even more well behaved now so he could help mama get better and help papa, too", Pascale added, approaching you and kissing your forehead lovingly, "all will be well, chérie", she whispered, leaving you three.
"Mama, I made you a drawing", Hervé announced, grabbing the sheet of paper from his backpack and showing it, "it's a sun, some clouds and a rainbow. Because even when it rains, sometimes you see a rainbow", he announced happily, "That's right, my love", you cheered, feeling Charles sit next to you on the sofa, "I have you boys with me, there is no rain that is going to bring any harm", you expressed your gratitude, feeling Charles embrace you both while Hervé picked out a movie for you to watch.
.
Hervé walked hand in hand with his gradmother after she picked him up from pre-school, "I'm going to see my mama and my sister," he announced to anyone that they crossed on the hospital corridor, his big brother badge earning many smiles and compliments on the labour ward, "mama and papa are in that room there, but do you remember what I told you, mon petit?", Pascalr asked softly, earning a nod, "mama needs to rest, and I have to be careful with her tummy because that is where Amélie came from", he said, "And your voice?", she smiled, "quiet voice", he nodded before she knocked on the door, Charles coming to open it and greet his eldest and his mother.
Hervé curiously looked around, taking everything in and seeing you on the bed with your daughter sleeping on your chest, "Mama", he whispered, approaching you.
Charles helped him up to sit on the bed next to you without hurting you before greeting his mother, thanking her for looking after the little boy, "Hey mon petit, how are you?", you brushed his soft hair with your fingers, not receiving an answer as he was mesmerised with the little baby on your chest, "can I touch her cheek?", he asked, his little hand stretching, "of course, mon ange", you urged, seeing Charles and Pascale sit on the sofa by the window.
"Her skin is so soft", he noted, earning chuckles from everyone, "it is, very soft", Charles agreed as he watched Hervé completely mesmerised with his sister, "is she going to join us when me and papa go see the karts?", "when she's older, yes. For now we'll stick to laying on us, letting her sleep and some tummy time later".
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letsgetrowdy43 · 9 months
Text
Do first, think later—
Jack Hughes x Reader
Request: Jack’s gf finds out she’s pregnant but Jack doesn’t know how to process it at first. So she felt alone and decided to take a trip back home to Michigan to see family but Jack freaks out and flies out of NJ to see her
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She and Jack had their fair share of pregnancy scares over the span of their relationship, no matter how careful they were there was always a chance and a moment of pure fear while staring at the time on their phones as they watched the negative sign slowly appear.
This time though, this time was different.
The symptoms were really strong, nausea was insane, her boobs had grown a cup size, and the food aversions were becoming intense. That's when Jack suggested maybe testing, just to stop the stress from building, fingers crossed that the tiny stick would show the answer they both wanted. But as that second line appeared both Y/n and Jack went down a spiral, her hands covering her mouth to stop the gasp that was bubbling up in her throat.
"Okay, we can-" the tears started as she looked up at her boyfriend who stared at the counter in shock. All of the colours drained from his face as he swallowed thickly, finally looking at her, "I need to go for a walk," he said making a bee-line for the front door. She cried quietly while following him to the door, disbelief filling the empty space between them as he ignored the pleas for him to stay, "Can we at least talk about this before you leave Jack?" "I need to leave, I'll be back," he promised, still not fully looking at her as he slipped on his sneakers and was out the front door.
He didn't return that night, or the next, finally on the third day, she finally got confirmation on where he was. She had called Jack multiple times, then she called Quinn, Ellen, Dawson, John, Jesper, and then finally she called Nico who answered immediately.
"Please tell me he's with you, if he's not I'm filing a missing persons report," she said desperately as he let out a sigh. "Yeah he's here, physically at least, he seems zoned out," Nico frowned as he peaked into the living room at the twenty-two-year-old who was quietly staring out the apartment window. a weight lifted off of her chest as she heard the words, "Okay good, at least he's safe."
"What happened? if you don't mind me asking," he asked, shutting his bedroom door so that Jack couldn't hear their conversation. Tears welled up in her eyes as she sat down on the edge of her and Jack's bed, surrounded by clothes and a suitcase, "I'm pregnant, and we thought it was just a scare, but it wasn't, and then he left." "Oh." "I'm really fucking scared Neeks," she cried as her hands wiped away the smudged mascara from her cheeks, "I'm going home to my parents, I don't want to be alone right now," she tried to find a strong voice but lost as she received the notification with the confirmation of her flight. "You do whatever you need, I'll make sure he's safe, you go and be with your family," he said as she whispered a thank you and hung up to finish her packing.
Within the next twenty-four hours the girl found herself in the Detroit airport, Quinn waited for her in the arrivals, pulling her into a hug as he helped her with her bags and led her to the family van.
"He's gonna come to his senses," Quinn said reassuringly as she cried in the passenger seat, her puffy face hiding in her hands as Quinn ran a hand over her back. "He disappeared when I needed him," she frowned. "Trust me, I am not excusing his actions, I'm so mad at him for doing that to you," livid was more the word he would use to describe it, his brother was a much better man than the one who abandoned his young, pregnant girlfriend, "he's more of a do now, think later kind of guy, you know that, he just needs time, and when he comes back to his senses he's gonna hate himself."
She knew it was true, there was never an action that Jack Hughes made that he didn't immediately cringe after. He lived a life of regret, and this was going to be one of those things in his life that he's gonna look back at and be disgusted at for the rest of his life.
"So are you going home to your parents or mine?" Quinn asked as he looked from the road to her. She frowned and thought for a second before she looked at him, "Probably yours, if you think your mom wouldn't mind, I don't think I can tell my mom and dad yet, not while I'm so panicked," she mumbled as the tears started back up again.
Quinn frowned, trying to think of something to say to take her mind off of his idiotic brother, "So I'm gonna be an uncle? I've always wanted a nephew... a niece would be pretty sweet too" The girl grinned at his dorkiness, "Yeah? I've always thought Jack would be a good girl-dad," she grinned as her hand slid down to touch her stomach, her eyes widened at the realization that she was going to be a mom.
Jack returned to their shared apartment the night she flew back to Michigan, his heartbeat in his ears as he searched the apartment for her, only to be met with an empty closet and a lack of her bubbly presence. He chewed his bottom lip nearly off as he did another search of the house, his head spinning with nerves as he stumbled upon a sticky note stuck to the fridge.
"I'm going home for a bit, please call me when you're home and safe, just need to hear your voice -- Y/n <;3"
His phone started ringing loudly, his shaky hands fishing it out of his pocket as he re-read the note over and over again.
"Hello?" "Why is your girlfriend asleep in your old bedroom, looking like the shell of herself, by herself? So help me Jack if you did something to upset that poor girl I will have your head," Ellen scolded over the phone, his body deflated at the sound of his mother's voice instead of Y/n's.
"I fucked up Mom, like so bad," he started, and so did the tears, "I left her here all alone when she really needed me, and I just walked out," he stated rambling, choking on tears as his breaths grew short. Ellen started to tear up at the sound of her son in such distress, "Honey, I need you to breathe, can you do that for me?" she asked as she heard his cries grow quieter on the other end.
"What did you do? I'm sure you can fix it." "She's pregnant, I'm gonna be a dad," Ellen's jaw dropped as she stood in the silence of the Hughes Lakehouse, looking over to Jim who stared at her with furrowed brows. "I'm gonna give you some advice Honey. You are going to get on a flight as soon as you can and fix this in person," Ellen said as she hung up the phone and left him to deal with the issue of his own.
Jim stared at her with a quirked eyebrow, "we are gonna be grandparents," she grinned as Jim choked on his coffee.
Less than twelve hours later, Jack was on the porch of his family's summer house, his heart beating at a fast pace as he stared at the door, trying to convince himself to open it. He took a deep breath and opened the door to be met with Luke who looked at him with a confused look, "you look like shit dude," he said as Jack rolled his eyed. "Thanks, much appreciated, where's Y/n?" "She's out in the back, she was sitting on the dock," Luke shrugged, unaware of all of the tension floating around the house.
She was exactly where Luke said she would be. Sat prettily at the edge of the dock, watching the sunset on the rippling water, a foot in the lake as she stared away numbly.
He stood at the shore, hands shoved in his pockets as he watched her, staring so peacefully, but looking so small, so unsure of herself. He hated that he did that, just as Quinn had suspected. Jack knew they could do it, they could be parents, but in the heat of the moment he wasn't so sure, and now it was leading to be the biggest regret of his life. Even with their young age, a family was everything he dreamed of, this just happened to be a few years earlier than his original plan.
She looked back at him, tears in her eyes as she ushered him to sit next to her, "Please stop just staring at me, it's making me nervous," she sadly joked as he walked over and sat down on the aged wood right next to her.
He stared at her as she watched the horizon, her bottom lip pulled between her teeth as she ignored his gaze, "I'm sorry, about it all," he frowned as she blinked away the tears in her eyes. Jack knew he was gonna need to say a lot more but the words were dying on the tip of his tongue as she ignored him some more.
"We are just so young, and the positive showed up and I just blanked and all of sudden I was in Nico's living room with a million missed calls from everyone and I realized that I'm going to be a Dad." The tears started as he reached out for her hand, she pulled away from his grasp, wiping away her own tears. "I came back to reality and realized that I fucking failed you, I've never hated myself more for something in my life, cause you're my person and I left you, and by extension, I left our baby and holy shit I'm the worst ever Y/n," she finally looked at him to see his face red and puffy, her hand reaching out for his now, "I'm so sorry, I don't think I will ever be able to say it enough times to make it right, but I hope you know how much I truly mean it."
The tears that rolled down her cheeks itched as she tried to calm herself down enough to form a coherent sentence, "I'm so mad at you right now." "I know baby," his hand reached out to tuck her bangs out of the way of her tear-stained cheeks. "You disappeared, and I was at home worrying myself ill, I almost called the authorities!" she gave him a very much-deserved scolding, as she curled up into a ball, knees pulled up to her chest as she let out a tired breath, "I can't even be mad at you either cause you were scared!" "No no, be mad, I hurt you" "I can't cause I feel the same way, I don't know how to be a mom, I'm twenty-one," she cried as he wrapped his arms around her and hugged her into his chest.
"We are gonna be great parents," he said, cupping her face in his hands as she cried, "You are so kind baby, and our baby is gonna be the most loved baby ever, and we can finally get that house in Hoboken we've been looking into," he started listing off all of the things to look forward to with this baby on the way, "we may be young, but there is no one out there that can be as compassionate and as kind as you, and you're about to be the hottest mom that's ever walked this earth," she blushed a bright red as she leaned into him.
"You're gonna be a good dad too," she said once she calmed down a bit, her lips pressing a short kiss to his shoulder. He grinned as his fingers intertwined with hers, "you think?" "I know you will be," she took his hand and placed it on her stomach, he leaned forward to capture her lips in a slow kiss, a mixture of passion and emergency filled their kisses as her hand wrapped around the back of his neck. He smiled into the kiss and pulled away with a grin, "your boobs grew," he smirked like a horny teenage boy as she rolled her eyes. "You're like a twelve-year-old," she smiled as he nipped at her jaw before pressing a kiss to it. "Suck it up, I'm your baby daddy," she grimaced at the term before he kissed her once again.
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