#melon watches stuff

[slightlydepressedmelon]

Good Omens S2 E4

(chaotic thoughts as they happen)

“but not beebop” asdfghjkl

“why Crowley should risk destruction for you” oh gee I wonder

SHE HEARD THAT HIM AND CROWLEY WERE AN ITEM IM SCREAMING

I’m sorry are you telling me that Azi told him you go to fast for me but then let Crowley drive him anyway! how am I supposed to recover from that

I really like this magic practicing scene

Aziraphale is so Autism coded in the most wonderful way and I love it

they’re really just spending the whole night together doing married couple shit

I am loving the theme of trusting someone meaning something and it constantly coming back to our babies even though I can’t articulate this the best

the smile and talking through gritted teeth secretly during the performance ahhhh

I don’t love the zombie stuff it’s just not my vibes really idk

“I knew you’d come through for me you always do” excuse me while I cry

shades of dark and very light gray

CROWLEYS PET!

Nina’s partner makes me upset

I love the plants in their little boxes

Crowley why are you talking to the Bentley like that baby boy

7.8/10 a fantastic episode just not my cup of tea

[loopscereal]

@multishipper-baby @thedumbestfuckingpersonyouvemet

you guys both mentioned the background so uh lol hi. btw do tell me to stop @/ing you guys if you dont want me to do that :3

Anyways I'm glad that you noticed the bg! i actually did that first before toddy. Sorta as a warm up, just blocking in shapes of characters. First it was gonna all be silhouettes like the screenshot, it then i started having fun setting up a genuine scene. Having them all "doing their own thing" as characters with names faces rather than blank slates was very fun.

Just the filling in of a void. Having messy blocked in characters with juuuust enough detail to be recognizable was satisfying to do.

I did, I jrook the original bg, coppied the mos visible half and then flipped it over to cover more of original toddy, then started "painting" over it with blocky shapes. Again, it was originally gonna be shillouettes like the og, but i suddently started making em the cast lol. it makes me happy to hear that you like what i did with toddyyyy :3 I like making up styles for herrrr

It might look like a lot of people, but its not everyone, far from it tbh lol. The toys, Town and Cami, Lilly, Golden and Puppet, Fox an Bonnie, Mai, Malva and Loon, our version of Felix, then two oc's. Based of lefty and ennard.

Also yes, they all have animal features. Cami has antennae because shes a Praying Mantis, that is also why shes so damn tall. In the arthropod world Mantis are built all vertical which is very odd. In my friends words. They're freaks of nature /lighthearted. Anyways, This is why you will see us drawing her with things such as segmented limbs, green "blades" on her arms, and cool bug eyes. She has green surface blood.

Towns a lion, Lilly is a shark, a nurse shark specifically as a reference to Melanie Martinez since Lilly has that song that's a cover of Mrs Potato Head. (it was a process of just looking at Melanie's song titles names and looking up if any sharks had names with certain keywords.)

Joy is a duck, "isn't Chica a chicken though?" yeah. In the fnaf fanbase people confused Chica for a duck sometimes, though so! She's a duck. Chica herself is a chicken, though :3 Bon n Malva n Bonnie are rabbits (all to be determined what specific species)

Loon is your classic 7 spotted ladybug, complete with segmented limbs, antennae that's sprout from the back of her neck that aid in listening to very quiet sounds. He has yellow surface blood. Mangle is a fox (again, to be determined what subspecies.) You might notice that he is missing his tail though. Or, well. She has a little stub, which is why shes got the cane right now, Animals with Tails need those, mainly for balance.

Fox is your classic red fox.

Golden is an Andean/ spectacles bear, Mai n Pup are ring tailed lemurs. Lefty is Mai and Pups cousin, so she is an indri lemur.

Ennard is an amblypygi, also knows as a whip spider (don't be fooled its not a type of spider) Extra appendages for sensing things like vibrations Toddy, is a cinnamon bear, a sub species of black bear !!!!! "Felix" (Felicia now) is too be determined on her animal all together. We have too many fox's and bears and rabbits so were holding off on repeating those any more than we have to. Fede is still a bear (for now??) though because it satisfies me to complete the "main bear types". Polar bear. erm. anyways i love ranting abt our silly ass animal choiced i could do it till the end of time.

[xoshepard]

i make a post about japanese art history every couple of years i feel like but it's so fun to reminisce... the professor was like one of my only two non-japanese profs? but her last name was japanese so ig she moved to japan to study and teach and just settled there

but even though she was an interesting teacher and the topics were rly fun and fascinating, only me and my friend ever raised our hands and participated and stuff

on the last day of class she let us watch the original godzilla and she brought a bunch of candy for me and my friend to thank us for always participating :')

[1eos]

i def agree with ur work culture in kpop post. i actually tried it once and i was like "how the fuck do these freaks even handle this???" gone are the days when we actually stream bc we liked the song. now it's some sort of "moral duty" where you are seen as "morally deplorable" if u don't help ur meow meow make the charts 😭😭 nowadays whenever i see those fans bragging abt their yt numbers i just cackle bc i know none of it is genuine. instead it now becomes a metric as to how they don't have a life beyond kpop 💀💀

you really have to wonder how ppl have the time 😭😭 unless you're in high school and not working or doing any time consuming extracurricular idk how anyone manages to stream. like the one time i tried to stream it was when jonghyun dropped she is but i had so much fucking homework i had to give that up so it's CRAZY to see ppl out here trying to manipulate ppl nd say you're fucking disgusting for having a LIFE. and realizing a lot of these big groups have inflated numbers cheapens it all for me too. like gkgakgklkglglkgalk in my head absolutely none of these idols are stars bc the MOMENT organic success becomes en vogue their careers are headed to the landfills like them albums!!!!

[highlifeboat]

Cass: Mel Bell please..for the love of Miranda we’ve been watching Bluey for past hour

Melon: but it makes me happy ;-;

Cass: 4 more episodes

Melon: 4 more episodes

*3 hours later*

Melon: *happily on the 3rd season*

Cass:

Love that Cassandra is forced to sit there and watch a show about a domestic dog family while her almost 22 year old girlfriend does her little happy stims and sings along with the little intro song.

And I say "Forced" with huge quotations because she doesn't have to stay. Like, Melony has no real way to stop Cassandra from just leaving (and she probably wouldn't anyway if Cass really wanted to go).

But... Cass also likes seeing Melon be happy, especially to a point where she's so relaxed and just kind of vibing. And if it takes a special interest in some dumb kids' show to do that, then Cass can't say she has a huge problem with it. (Especially since she at least gets some extra cuddles in) She just wishes Melony wouldn't binge it all at once.

[melonpond]

*wistfully stares out window* Someday I'll have enough time to watch Quackity's lore stream

[aguademelon047]

Pulled a boy by being obsessed with nbc Hannibal. I didn’t think that was possible.

[jeepers-scoob]

ALEKSANDR!!??

[nibbelraz]

I am endlessly entertained by the prospect of MBJ just having literally no clue how human physiology works, and thus believing everything he hears (which, paired with SQH's propensity for saying dumb shit without thinking, is a recipe for disaster)

like:

SQH: ugh if I read any more expense reports my eyeballs will fall out of my head

MBJ: *frantically gathering as many expense reports as he can carry before shoving them into the fire*

SQH: *literally watching all his work burn up in flames* i-

MBJ: please hold in your eyeballs

______

SQH, offhandedly: lmao wei qingwei ate so many bao buns at the festival that I honestly think he's going to turn into one

MBJ, absolutely horrified, actually gives his condolences to the (very confused) human man because this affliction which will soon take his humanity is a fate worse than death. Also he starts hiding SQH's melon seeds

_____

SQH: ugh I'm so stressed out i'm gonna EXPLODE

MBJ: NO-

Yes YES OH man Shang Qinghua definitely has no filter when complaining about stuff, Poor Mobei he's learning so many awful things about humans and how MUCH DANGER THEYRE IN (how much danger his favorite human is in)

He tries to learn more about what can happen to his poor human so he's spying on Shen Qingqiu and Shang Qinghuas meetings only to hear them BOTH dramatically explain how tired they are, Shen Qingqiu with some peak lord duties juggled with Binghe and Shang Qinghua with just the amount of paper work and how they both won't make it if things don't slow down soon which prompts Mobei to immediately tell Luo Binghe that his consort is going to DIE if he doesn't get rest immediately this second

I can see this getting SO out of hand so fast, He'd bury Shang Qinghua in blankets and hold him tight so absolutely nothing can bother him and he'd be safe

[slightlydepressedmelon]

Good Omens S2E6

(chaotic thoughts as they happen)

here we go I’m ready to cry

“three questions, none of them simple”

I love seeing Crowley in heaven just aesthetically

oh no his heavenly outfit is awful this is the worst (his walk is hilarious tho)

LETS GO LESBIANS

noooo Maggie

I like seeing Azi getting to be intense

the golden snake tattoo!

“I haven’t always been a demon. And they never change their password” why did that make me emotional?

“does what you say make sense in your head?”

aww he’s traumatized from the book fire

CROWLEYS EMOTIONAL SUPPORT ANGEL

an institutional problem

the little shoulder bump

Azi’s hesitancy with the book throwing my little bean

his halo!!!!

whoopsies

Crowley’s so smug I love him

“you came back” the way Azi said that has me tearing up ahhh

the way Beelzebub talks to the fly is so cute

I was not expecting a B and G friendship

are they flirting?

“silly silly angel” “I just found something that mattered more to me than choosing sides” “where Beezlbub is, is my heaven”I love these lines but I wish so much they were from Azi and Crowley instead

ALPHA CENTURIA

saying he always wanted to go there and looking at Aziraphale!!!

“do people ever ask for death?” asdfghjkl

I love the way Crowley is sitting in the chair asdfghjkl

“the day can’t get any weirder”

“an extremely alcoholic breakfast”

awww Crowley wants alone time with Aziraphale

and he’s tidying up the books up for him!!

healthy breakup and relationship conversations with the lesbians!!!

“I say something brilliant he says something unintentionally funny back”

I love Crowley so much. I didn’t think I had a favorite child but I might.

it makes me happy that Muriel likes reading

THEYRE SO ADHD AND AUTISM CODED

Azi is so happy that he could bring Crowely to heaven look at his face! I can’t ahhhhh

Aziraphale what happened to OUR SIDE

this scene is so dam good

the noises I made during Crowley’s speech

NO NIGHTENGALES I GASPED

US!!!!! US US US US

THE GLOW UP FROM OUR SIDE TO US

I’M SCREMAING I NEED TO UNPAUSE

 HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT

THEY ACTUALLY KISSED

I saw one image of the kiss a while ago but thought it was an edit and then when this scene started I was like wait a second but part of me still didn’t believe it

I shed actual tears oh my lord I’m actually crying I can’t believe this

how am I supposed to process

“I forgive you” “don’t bother” HOW DARE YOU NIEL GAMIAN

Aziraphel my precious bean don’t cry

NOT THE LIP TOUCH

I hate that he’s going back to faking being okay with it all

oh my gosh! I just realized that Crowley saying he understands what Azi is offering better than he does is probably at least partially referencing what Gabriel said when casting him into hellfire! he never told him he’s lived with that pain and anger and not told him ahhhh (I mean I can’t confirm this but that’s my thinking at least)

“we call it the second coming” *dramatic music*

*A Nightingale Sang in Berkeley Square starts playing* me: NO!

THE BENTLEY ALWAYS PLAYS QUEEN BUT NOW ITS PLAYING THAT SONG DO YALL UNDERSTAND THE EMOTIONAL WRECKAGE (I’m sure you do you’re also good omens fans probably)

how could you do this. how could you end it like this. how could you?

9.7/10 I need season 3 now

[w2soneshots]

Can you do a oneshot where Simon is saying it is to easy to be pregnant so he has to wear a fake Belly for 24 hours and they will be filming the howl day beeing pregnant together

Easy -W2S

Words: 0.4k+

Warnings: pregnancy.

In which Harry thinks being pregnant isn’t that hard so you decide to prove him wrong.

a/n: hey babe! I hope you don’t mind but I decided to do this for bog instead of Simon, since I could envision this happening with him more🫶🏼. I loved the video Faith did with Ethan that's similar to this so when I got this request I was quite excited to write it. I hope you enjoy💕

Liked by faithloisak and 409,163 others

y/username: when he says being pregnant isn't that hard... new video out now🍉🫃🏼

Tagged: @wroetoshaw

-comments-

taliamar: you look stunning

-> y/username: 💗

y/nfanpage21: oh Harry you donut

-> y/username: 😂🤣

behzingagram: hahaahahah

user71487109: the third pic😭

user17048282: this bout to be hilarious

"So... you don't think it's hard being pregnant?" I reiterated Harry's statement. "Uh well- no. I guess the start wasn't great when you had morning sickness n stuff but now you've got so much energy, no symptoms and your bump isn't even that big." He replied. I raised my eyebrows "ok then." A thought popped into my head. This is gonna to be fun.

Two weeks later I'd secretly brought everything I would need for the video. "Haz!" I shouted through our home "can you come here for a sec!" Seconds later I heard loud footsteps quickly coming down the carpeted stairs. "Everything alright?" He asked, once he was in our kitchen/dining room. "Yup, can you come and film a video with me... please?" He sighed then fixed his hair with his hands "Ok. What video?" I smirked "come sit down and I'll tell you." He sat down on the chair next to me and I switched the camera on. "Ok, so do you remember like... two weeks ago when you said that making a whole human wasn't that hard?" I watched as he got slightly nervous. "Uh yes." He replied. "Well I thought that today you could try it." His brows furrowed "Try what?" "Being pregnant."

"I bought this watermelon and some cling film." Harry sighed "oh nelly." I giggled then passed the melon to him. He held it in place while I used the cling film to attach it to him, over his shirt. "Fuckin hell this thing is heavy." He moaned. "Mhm, I bought the biggest one they had." I hummed. Once I was finished I made him put on and take off shoes, sit down, try to get comfortable, then stand up again, walk up and down the stairs and try to 'take a nap'. "I'm so out of breath." Harry stood bent over with both hands on his knees. While I stood filming him. I was finding it absolutely hilarious, since he'd thought it "wasn't that hard."

I sat in bed between Harry's legs, his hands gently resting on my bump. "Ok I admit it. I was definitely wrong, being pregnant is a lot harder than it looks. I'm sorry." He gently rubbed circles on my clothed skin. "Don't be sorry Haz. I got a great video out of it." He laughed.

[i-turned-into-the-stone]

would love to see a fic with saerom :) her abs are just heavenly 😍

🍄 anon

Smut Dump 2: Saerom

A/N: Hello there, mushroom anon! Sorry that I took so long to get to your request. I don't know whether you're still here or not but if you are, I hope you like it. Since I don't know what kind of smut you want, I went with the regular one judging from that wholesome emoji, lol. No tags because it's just the basic stuff.

The club's pulsing beats reverberate through your body as you nurse a drink, scanning the crowd. Your eyes lock onto a vision of perfection; Lee Saerom, the famous K-pop idol, her toned abs peeking through a blue top. She moves with feline grace, swaying her wide hips full of allure.

As if sensing your stare, Saerom turns and your eyes meet. A wicked smile plays on her full lips as she saunters over. "Well, hey there, handsome. Enjoying the view?" Her voice is low and sultry.

You gulp, unable to tear your gaze from the alluring curves of her body. "I… You're stunning." That's all that manages to come out of your gaping mouth. 

Saerom chuckles. "I know." She leans in close, her breath hot on your ear. "Why don't you buy me a drink and we can get to know each other better?"

Your mouth goes dry as she presses her lithe form against you. The scent of her perfume - jasmine and melon - overwhelms your senses. You nod dumbly.

Smiling, Saerom orders two shots of liquor. She licks her pink lips slowly before downing the first one. You watch, transfixed, as her slender throat works with each swallow.

"Your turn," she challenges, pushing the other shot towards you.

You drain it, the fiery liquid burning your throat. Before you can react, Saerom grabs your collar and crushes her mouth to yours. Her tongue slips past your lips, exploring hungrily as she grinds her pelvis against your growing erection.

Breaking the scorching kiss, she murmurs, "Let's take this somewhere more private."

You can only nod as she takes your hand and leads you through the crowd to the VIP lounge. The heavy bass thrums through the plush couches as Saerom pushes you down onto one. 

Her eyes smolder with lust as she straddles your lap, tantalizingly rolling her hourglass hips. "You've been a good boy… And I love a good boy.”

Saerom's hands roam over your solid chest as she claims your lips in another wild sloppy kiss. Her tongue dances, both of you moaning into each other's mouths. The heady scent of her arousal fills the air, making your cock throb painfully in your pants.

Breaking the kiss with a wicked grin, your shirt is gone in one pull. Saerom slides off your lap and onto her knees between your spread thighs. Her nimble fingers make quick work of your belt and zipper, freeing your rigid cock. She licks her lips slowly as she wraps her hand around the thick shaft.

"Fuck, you're big.” She gives you a few firm strokes. You groan at her touch, your hips bucking involuntarily. Saerom tutts and pins you down with one hand on your stomach while the other continues pumping your cock. 

"Be a good boy and hold still," she reprimands. "I want to taste every inch of this delicious cock."

Her pouty lips part and she swirls her tongue around the swollen head, lapping up the beads of pre-cum. You fist the couch, fighting not to thrust into her warm mouth as she slowly takes you deeper. 

Saerom hollows her cheeks, sucking hard as she bobs up and down your shaft.

"Oh fuck… Saerom..." you groan, your head falling back.

She hums in approval, sending delicious vibrations along your length. Her free hand fondles your balls, gently massaging them. You're in ecstasy, drowning in the incredible sensations of her mouth and hands.

All too soon, you feel that telltale tightening in your loins. "Saerom… I'm gonna… Oh fuck!”

Rather than pull away, she only increases her suction, cheeks hollowing obscenely. With a strangled cry, you explode, your release pulsing down her eager throat. Saerom swallows every drop, licking you clean with broad strokes of her tongue.

"Delicious," she commends, rising to her feet and straddling you once more. "But I'm just getting started with you."

Saerom rises from your lap, her toned abs rippling with each suggestive movement. She slowly peels off her fuzzy top, revealing her pert breasts spilling over a lacy black bra. Your cock twitches, already stirring back to life at the lewd sight.

"I guess you like what you see?" she teases, running her hands over the ridges of her chiseled abdomen.

"God yes..." you rasp, drinking in every inch of her flawless body.

Smirking, Saerom turns around, giving you an unobstructed view of her back muscles flexing. She bends over slowly, the curves of her ass straining against the tight denim of her jeans. You can see the outline of her pussy through the fabric and you swallow a big chunk.

Saerom's glances over her shoulder. Her dark eyes sparkle with mischief, and the corners of her lips curl into a proud smile. "I've been working extra hard on my body," she says, her voice husky with desire. "You know me so you must know how much I love showing them off."

She arches her back, accentuating the defined ridges of her abdomen. The dim lighting casts sensual shadows on her taut muscles, drawing your gaze to them irresistibly. 

"Touch them," she commands, her voice husky and filled with need. "Run your hands all over me."

You don't need any further urging. Your fingers tremble as you reach out and trace the grooves of her heavenly abs. The firm muscles lie beneath her silky skin, inviting your touch. As your palms roam freely over her toned torso, a low moan escapes from Saerom's lips.

"That's it, baby," she breathes, her voice a seductive whisper. "Worship my body with those greedy hands."

The scent of her arousal grows even stronger, mingling with the air. You notice a damp patch spreading on the crotch of her jeans, evidence of her dripping pussy. Unable to resist, you slip one hand lower, cupping her molten heat through the jeans.

Saerom gasps, pushing her ass back against your palm, shamelessly grinding against you. "Fuck… I'm so wet for you,", her voice filled with need. "Get these jeans off me and put that mouth to work."

A low growl escapes your throat as you quickly unfasten Saerom's jeans and peel them down her toned thighs. To your delight, she's not wearing any panties, her glistening pussy bare before you. Its flushed and slick folds beg to be devoured.

Unable to resist any longer, you bury your face between her legs from behind, inhaling the intoxicating musky aroma. Saerom cries out as your tongue licks over her dripping slit in one long, broad stroke.

"Oh fuck yes!" she exclaims, her voice filled with pleasure. "Eat me out, you filthy boy."

You eagerly obey, your tongue lapping and sucking at her sensitive flesh with wanton abandon. Saerom's thighs quiver as you swirl your tongue around her clit, lavishing it with kitten licks before plunging back into her heating cunt.

"Oh God, hng~ You were made to please me with that mouth," she pants, grinding her crotch against your lips and chin.

Your hands roam freely over the heaving of her belly, feeling the muscles clench with each brush of your tongue. Saerom's back arches sharply as you seal your lips around her throbbing pearl, sucking hard.

"Yes! Just like that! Don't stop… I'm so close," she moans, her voice filled with urgency.

Her throaty moans and the heady tang of her nectar spur you on. You slip two fingers knuckle-deep into her sopping canal, curling them against her spongy front walls, making Saerom's velvet walls flutter around your invading digits as you work that sweet spot.

"Oh god! Oh fuck! I'm… I'm coming!" she wails, her whole body convulsing.

A rush of her tangy essence floods your tongue as Saerom's orgasm crashes over her in shattering waves. You eagerly slurp it up, savoring her exquisite flavor and reveling in her broken whimpers of bliss.

Finally, her tremors subside, and she collapses bonelessly onto the couch, her chest heaving. Saerom looks utterly debauched - sweat-slicked skin, tousled hair, and eyes glazed with satiated lust.

"Get over here and let me taste myself on you," she orders, beckoning you with one finger.

You can hardly believe your luck as you crawl over to where Saerom lies sprawled, her eyes heavy-lidded with thirst. Her toned abs rise and fall with each ragged breath, glistening with a sheen of sweat. The scent of her sex hangs thick in the air.

Without preamble, Saerom grabs a fistful of your hair and crushes your mouths together in a bruising kiss. Her tongue thrusts past your lips, hungrily seeking the taste of her own climax. She moans lightly, tasting the remnants of her juice.

Breaking the kiss with a filthy groan, Saerom pushes you onto your back and straddles your hips. Her smoldering gaze rakes over your body as she grinds her dripping core against your rigid length.

"You've been such a goodboy, pleasuring me with that wicked tongue," her voice filled with desire. She trails her nails over your chest, leaving a trail of tingling sensations. "I think you deserve a reward."

With a sweet smile, Saerom rises up on her knees and holds your throbbing cock in her small hand. She gives it a few steady strokes, spreading the beads of pre-cum over the swollen head. Then, without hesitation, she sinks down on your shaft in one smooth motion, impaling herself.

Both of you cry out at the scorching heat of her tight depths enveloping you completely. The fullness Saerom experiences makes her tremble. Her inner walls wrench and pulse around your thickness as she slowly begins to ride you. Her toned thighs tense with each roll of her hips.

"Fuck… You feel so good stretching me open! Ahh, so big!" she moans, increasing her pace.

You groan incoherently, overwhelmed by the exquisite sensations of her tight, molten sheath. Your hands find purchase on her waists, fingers digging into her flesh as she bounces on you hard. The lewd sounds of flesh smacking together blend with your ragged pants and moans.

Saerom's breasts bounce enticingly with each downward plunge, straining against the lacy confines of her bra. Unable to resist, you reach up and cup the generous mounds, rolling the stiff peaks between your fingers.

"Yes! Ohh~ Play with my tits while I fuck you stupid," she growls, throwing her head back in ecstasy.

You obey with relish, squeezing and kneading these firm globes as Saerom's movements become more frantic. Her inner walls convulse and milk your cock, driving you rapidly towards the edge.

"I'm gonna come again," she whimpers, increasing the frenzied grind of her hips. "Fill me up, baby… I want to feel your hot load painting my womb."

With a guttural roar, you obey, your own climax crashing over you. Thick ropes of your cum flood Saerom's spasming channel as she screams through her own shattering peak. She slams down hard, grinding her pelvis in tight circles to milk every drop from you.

Finally, utterly spent, Saerom collapses forward onto your sweat-slicked chest. You both lay there for long moments, hearts pounding and lungs heaving as you bask in the afterglow.

"Mmm...that was incredible," sounding satisfied, nuzzling against your neck.

You can only hum in agreement, still dazed from the mind-blowing pleasure. Still cannot entirely believe what just happened. Saerom chuckles hoarsely and presses a lingering kiss to your lips.

"This was just the start, baby. I have so many more delicious plans for you…"

Saerom rolls off you with a naughty grin, her toned body glistening with a sheen of sweat. She crawls onto all fours on the fancy couch, presenting her round ass and dripping pussy to you in an utterly shameless display.

"I'm not done with you yet," she states over her shoulder, arching her back to accentuate the delicious curve of her spine. "Get over here and fuck me like the little slut I am."

No questions are asked - none needed, you move behind her and grasp her hips in a bruising grip. Saerom gasps as you grind your still-rigid cock against her sticky slick folds, coating yourself in her juice. Then, with one decisive thrust, you bury yourself to the hilt in her wringing pussy.

"Oh fuck yes!" she cries out, pushing her ass back to meet your thrust. "Pound me hard, baby...I want to feel it for days."

You are all too happy to oblige, slamming into her over and over. Saerom's tight yet shifty tube quivers around your pistoning cock. The harsh sounds of flesh smacking together mingle with her unrestrained moans and whimpers.

"Harder! Fuck me harder!" she demands breathlessly.

Increase the brutal pace, feeling her firm ass jiggle with the force of your thrusts. Saerom throws her head back in rapture, dark hair spilling down her arched spine. Her sweaty-toned back flexes and swells, every muscle standing out in sharp erotic relief.

"Oh god… I'm getting so damn close… Don't stop!" Her ragged cries urge you on. 

You reach around to roughly palm her breasts, rolling her nipples between your fingers, causing Saerom's inner walls to squeeze tight around your cock.

Huffing, you bury your cock completely inside her depth and unleash your load in thick, bursting spurts all the while Saerom's soul-shattering climax crashes over her in wrecking tides, her whole body writhing.

"Yes! Fuck, fuck, fuck— Fill me up!" she wails, grinding back to take you deeper.

You collapse in a sweaty, panting heap, utterly spent. The idol’s pussy continues to wring  around your over-sensitized shaft, coaxing out the last feeble twitches.

Then you slip free with a low squelch, your combined juices trickling down her thighs. Saerom rolls onto her back with a satisfied groan, not bothering to cover her glistening wet pussy.

"Mmm… I'm going to be feeling that pounding for weeks," she says, lazily trailing her fingers through the mess on her cunt.

You just stay quiet, watching what she's doing. Saerom shoots you a sly smile, then slowly brings her slick fingers to her lips and licks them clean with a shameless look on her face. Slowly pushing herself up, she suddenly shoves you onto your back, climbing your hips once more. Your dick twitches, still sensitive from your previous wild escapades.

"Looks like someone needs a little help getting hard again," wrapping her slippery hand around your half-erect cock.

You hiss as she starts jerking you off, her skilled fingers working your shaft with practiced ease. Saerom leans down to trail hot, open-mouthed kisses along your neck and chest. Her free hand roams freely, her nails raking over your nipples.

"That's it, baby, get nice and hard for me," she breathes against your skin.

True to her skills, you soon find yourself fully erect once more, throbbing and aching for release. Saerom smirks triumphantly and shifts her position, straddling your thighs with her back to you. She reaches behind to grasp your rigid cock, guiding it to nestle in the cleft of her firm ass. She begins to slide her hips in a slow torturous grind.

Your cock slid through her folds with each roll of her hips. Saerom's toned stomach grazes mere inches from your straining cock as she works herself into a frenzy. Her heavy-lidded gaze burns into yours, daring you to join her in utter debauchery.

Grasp her hips in a desperate grip and begin thrusting upwards, matching her movements. Saerom moans out in blissful rapture, increasing the frantic pace as the head of your cock slides through her needy cleft.

"Yes! Yes! Oh fuck yes!" she keens, grinding down hard.

Your discharge rapidly builds, a white-hot coil of tension in your loins. Saerom seems to sense it, her movements becoming more erratic. She palms her breasts roughly, pinching the sensitive nipples as her inner muscles clench.

"Do it! Cover me in your cum!" she demands. "Mark me as your slutty fucktoy!"

You obey, grunting, your cock shooting thick ropes of cum. Saerom throws her head back with a moan as the first few spurts paint her stomach. She continues working her hips, draining every drop from you until her tummy is utterly drenched.

"Look at this mess you made.” She rubs her dainty fingers through the pearly streaks coating her stomach. "I'm absolutely filthy."

Maintaining eye contact, Saerom brings her soiled digits to her lips and slowly licks them clean, moaning at the taste. Your spent cock twitches feebly at the sensual display as she savors every drop.

"Mmm... I think I need a shower when I get back to get nice and clean," she mutters, shooting you a heated look. "Care to join me and get dirty all over again?"

[kaysdenofchaos]

Man there is a particular feeling of rage I feel forwards people— especially younger generations— who find it acceptable to shame gen alpha

Bc like where’s the empathy? “Ohh they only watch coco melon and can’t spell” and whose Fucking fault is that. WHOSE FAULT IS THAT.

Genuinely WHY are y’all surprised when kids who had to spend their developmental years in a pandemic are struggling socially and intellectually like?? They didn’t just suddenly appear out of thin air, they lived through the same damn stuff everyone else did and are suffering for it

Damn man. Whatever happened to ‘let kids be kids?’ Why is there this immense pressure for kids to be self-aware of the problems that are pushed onto them? Why is the social expectation by peers to be nihilistic? And I’m not talking about high school kids, I’m talking middle school, literal 10yos and stuff.

I love my younger cousins to death, but it’s lowkey heartbreaking seeing them constantly act older than they are. So why are we pressuring gen alpha to be the same? To shame other children under, quite frankly, ableist rhetoric, and to grow up?

Seriously. The kids will be fine. They won’t cause ‘societal collapse.’ All they need is a bit of support, we all do.

Also skibidi toilets funny. Maybe not my type of humor but still funny. And kids still watch kid shows too: Eddsworld? TMNT? MLP? Pokémon? All still popular and relevant. Don’t act like y’all didn’t laugh at some weird shit too as a kid, get over yourselves

[ihavethedreamies]

Watermelon | Juicy Fruit | Mark

Mark Lee - NCT Dream

Rating: M (18+) MDNI

Word Count: ~1.6k

Pairing: Mark x AFAB!Reader

Genre: Reader-Insert, Smut, Established Relationship, Porn without Plot

!!This is smut…if that much isn't clear you should probably leave now!! MDNI!

Warnings: She/Her Pronouns used, Swearing, Kissing, Quickie, Sex in the Bathroom, Unprotected Sex (Don’t!!)

Summary: You end up making a bit of a mess with the watermelon…

Author's Note: This series was supposed to be of drabbles, and this is the second shortest one…sorry.

This is only vaguely based off of Smoothie…I say this because I got the idea for a fruit theme, but past that its unrelated.

🍇 Renjun 🍇

🍌 Jeno 🍌

🍒 Haechan 🍒

🍑 Jaemin 🍑

🍓 Chenle 🍓

🍍 Jisung 🍍

I am cross-posting this on Archive. Please reblog! If you know anyone that would like this or future fics but they aren't on here my name and icon are exactly the same on the other site. Happy reading!

It was hot. For you, too hot. And it was just your luck that the boys wanted to dick around outside because the weather was nice. Nice? No, it was hot as balls. While they ran around screaming, playing games and throwing stuff, you sat on a canvas camping chair. Your electric fan's batteries had died so you were futilely fanning yourself with a paper plate. Your thighs were sticking together, and your shorts were no help against the chafing. You shuffled again, grunting in discomfort, adjusting your sunglasses since they had slid down your nose from the sweat. Even in the shade of the tree and a slight breeze, it was still much too hot. Mark had offered to run to the convenience store down the road from your rental house and get something to cool you off. Glancing at your phone for the time, you wondered what the hell was taking so long, you were about to melt away.

"Noona~" Chenle called but you couldn't see him. Finally, he and Mark appeared from around the house as they went to the backyard where the rest of your group was. The second youngest had several bags of snacks, but what really caught your attention was what your boyfriend had in his arms. It was to no one's surprise he had somehow acquired a watermelon.

"Finally!" You exhaled harshly and Chenle dashed over to you, digging a cold bottle of water out and you yoinked it from him eagerly, chugging it down and he laughed.

"Slow done, babe." Mark huffed, letting the watermelon wrapped in a mesh settle on the grass near your feet. He watched as a bit of water slipped past your mouth and down your throat, landing on your white tank top, making the fabric darken. Swallowing, he shook his head to focus his attention elsewhere and kneeled near the melon so he could start cutting it.

"Uh, no." You shook your head, taking the knife from Mark that Renjun had brought out.

"I can do it!" He whined and you gave him a deadpan look and he just grumbled. Mark scooted over and you sat next to him, wrapping your legs around the big fruit to hold it in place. That looked even more dangerous than what he was planning, but you didn't keep it like that for long. Once you had dramatically stabbed the knife into the end of the rind, you adjusted and easily and evenly sliced it in half. Everyone watched in amazement as you deftly cut up the melon, laying each quarter of a slice into the big bowl Renjun had also brought out.

"Wow, she actually cut it evenly." Jaemin pointed out, giving Mark a very pointed look. The eldest looked back at him, slightly confused then offended.

"Hey!" He grumbled again and you grabbed a few slices with Mark and put them on a plate. While the rest of them continued to do whatever nonsense they were doing before, you and your boyfriend sat on the grass under the tree to eat the watermelon. Not thinking anything of it, because who would, you started to eat. It was very juicy, and the man's attention kept going back to your collarbone. After a big bite of the fruit, the juice spilled over your bottom lip and ran down your chin, your throat, pooled on your collar bone, then continued down to run into your cleavage. When you took another bite and even more juice spilled out you cringed, sucking in to try and keep it in your mouth.

"Geez." You mumbled, looking for a paper towel or napkin, something, to dry the juice. The pink liquid was already soaking into the white of your tank and luckily your bra was nude. Not only was your face and chest a mess, but your hands had gotten sticky. Mark watched your tongue lick furiously along your bottom lip, trying to get some of the juice off your chin.

"Let's get you cleaned up." You were shocked at the speed of your boyfriend, who had stood, hauling you up with him, and into the rental house. You both barely slipped your sandals off up entering and you were a bit surprised he dragged you toward the bathroom and not the nearby kitchen to get to a sink.

"Where are we going?" you questioned, blinking in shock as he pulled you into the bathroom, shutting and locking the door. As you stood near the vanity, hands in the air to avoid getting things stuck to them, you watched in surprise as he pinned you against the sink, his face getting very close. Even though he was your boyfriend, the proximity and intense look on his face made your own warm up red. His tongue flicked out, lapping at the drying juice on your face that was just as sticky as the stuff on your hands. He groaned as you shivered, his lips sealing over your own. Immediately you forgot about your sticky hands, going to the back of his shirt to hold on as he lifted you to rest on the bathroom vanity. You did at least have the subconscious thought to not touch his hair. His own sticky hands had met your waist, sneaking under your flimsy white tank, running his thumb over your smooth skin, it stuttered a bit from the juice. When his tongue entered your mouth, you both tasted the sweet watermelon on each other. A trail of saliva connected your lips when he finally pulled away, both of you panting.

"Fuck." He loved the dazed look that had spread across your face, and his smirked when his lips met your neck and you whined. His tongue ran along the path he had watched the juice flow over the skin, cleaning you off and at the same time heating your skin and core. Your hips jumped up from the counter, your denim covered mound grinding against his cock tenting his swim trunks. Mark continued to suck and nibble at you as he moved to follow that path of the watermelon juice, before your shirt covered the final destination. He pulled back just enough to get it off of you, the white material sticking briefly to his fingers. Yours stuck even more to his shirt as you hauled it off of him. Mark's mouth and tongue traced and nuzzled your breasts as he got your bra unhooked and off. Using his tongue to follow the trail of juice, he diverted at your sternum, sealing his lips over your nipple. You sighed, resting back on the counter so your bare back touched the cold mirror. As your boyfriend focused on the other side, he helped you wiggle your shorts off. You didn't have any panties on since your shorts were so tight, and it was so hot out anyway.

"Fuck… (Y/N)~" You would never get used to way he would moan your name.

"Mark, hurry." You furrowed your brow in playful frustration, trying to reach the waist band of his swim trunks to get them off. He huffed in amusement, having a better reach to do it himself.

"Hurry, hurry~" You nearly bounced in anticipation and his chuckle turned to a groan as he started to sink his cock inside of you. Your body shivered, your hand went to your mouth to try and muffle the pitiful moan you let out as he bottomed out. Like usual, you were soaked for him, making the entry easy.

"Try and stay quiet, baby." He rested his forehead on your shoulder, hands on your hips. You hiccupped when he gave a short but hard thrust, keeping up that pace, rapidly bringing you close to your orgasm already. His pelvis would grind against your clit every time he filled you fully, and your breath hitched each time. He gave a breathless chuckle at how cute you were, not noticing that his thrusts were strong enough to shake the vanity. The ceramic cup holding some toothbrushes rattled each time, growing closer and closer to the edge.

"Damn-" Mark groaned as quietly as he could, pulling your hips to the very edge of the vanity, your back slid down the mirror before landing on the marble. You wrapped your legs around his waist, hand pressed hard over your mouth, the other gripping the bar on the wall that held up the hand towel. Your boyfriend ran his tongue over his smirking bottom lip, enjoying watching you try desperately to stay quiet as he fucked you. He only slightly paused when the cup finally fell over, landing on the tile floor and shattering. It was out of the way, so his hips stuttered a bit, but he continued with a huff when you whined in desperation at the halt.

"Shit, babe-" He groaned, and you moaned as well, feeling your own climax getting closer. You both fell over when he did a final grind against your clit, as deep as he could go, spilling inside of you. The heat of his cum brought you over as well, and you pulled your hand from your mouth, panting quietly.

"S-sorry." Mark suddenly felt guilty for hauling you into the bathroom to fuck while all of your friends were possibly in ear shot.

"Th…that's okay." You gave him a tired smile and he kissed you softly with a giggle. After cleaning up a bit and straightening clothes and hair back up, you slipped back outside, and it seemed like no one had even noticed you two had been gone. Later, when you were inside to eat supper, you heard a loud shout from the bathroom.

"Who broke the toothbrush mug?!"

🍇 Renjun 🍇

🍌 Jeno 🍌

🍒 Haechan 🍒

🍑 Jaemin 🍑

🍓 Chenle 🍓

🍍 Jisung 🍍

Master-Master List

NCT Master List

[tubbytarchia]

Actually I'm gonna need a little insanity thread for all the rancher things I love as I watch their POV for the first time. I'll publicize this when I'm done with ep5

TLDR: Heavens, it is a long list. I cannot tldr this

Them running around in circles, completely lost after their first deaths whilst also not expressing even the slightest bit of anger (esp Jimmy because you know)

Them expecting the other to know how to build but neither of them can

Tango building a box of a house and Jimmy being absolutely smitten by it continuously

Tango praising Jimmy with full genuinity for bringing back... a bucket of water

Them cradling one little chicken like its their offspring before they can get more

Jimmy standing behind the door, calling for Tango in order to surprise him with cows.... god help my heart

Tango declaring them as team ranchers to immediately admit he might not be a very good rancher. This is good and cute because I love to see them struggle yet have unbridled support towards each other

Jimmy being cornered by Joel and Etho so Tango leaves to save him (or so he says at least!)

Jimmy ushering Tango into their house as Tango yells for help due to his hunger and being chased by mobs, and then Jimmy giving him two melon slices because that's all he has (They are so pathetically poor which only accentuates the wholesome and cute factor)

Jimmy accidentally picking up Tango's baked potato and then handing it back to him so they can eat together while Tango basically foams out the mouth because he's so hungry

"Welcome home honey"

Them celebrating being able to feed themselves to any degree

Tango all "I built that wall, it's ugly, continuing the trend" only for Jimmy to immediately proclaim that he likes it

Jimmy catching on that Tango can be a great builder actually and confronting him about it like he's just been cheated on

Tango blocking their entrance to prevent more cows from leaving for Jimmy to then admit that he was the one that broke the door, oops

Tango watching Jimmy escort two goats from a distance "he's doing great"

Them in total confusion wasting way too much time trying to figure out how to get goat horns as they're huddled in their house with said goats strolling around (and them continuing to get butted casually as they go about their normal activities) before eventually choosing to waste much more time by trying to do the same thing outside

Unrelated but Pearl of all people being the first person to come to them with genuine help rather than to fuck with them like everyone else

In the face of all their struggles, the thing that seems to bring the absolute most joy to Tango and Jimmy by this point is obtaining a silly little goat horn

The fact that they both got the exact same goat horn!!!

"I need stuff for tools, and I need stuff for Jimmy"

Tango defending their base's looks despite proclaiming to be a bad builder, because god, I want him to be doing that just because of how much Jimmy praised it

Nobody replying to their goat horns, but THEM replying to each other!! (They also toot at each other later when frantically looking for each other agh!!)

This time Tango interrogating Jimmy as if he's been cheated on because Jimmy went into the deep dark without his approval

"The R survived"

"Tango snap out of it; Tango's having a moment" *Tango yelling and groaning and grunting and laughing continuously*

"Tango, Tango, let's think about this. Let's think about this!" "Hold me back" "Tango, listen to the horn" Jimmy calming his deranged husband aw

Tango burying his head in a corner refusing to look at his beautiful ranch in complete ruin even as Jimmy coaxes him

Jimmy and Tango kind of begrudgingly accepting Scar trying to be nice but Jimmy still valiantly defending the foot tower before it burned to the ground

Their son/daughter :( (Tango refers to the Warden as a she one episode and a he in another. Their child was an icon...)

Tango expressing that he's proud of Jimmy for having stayed alive so long and Jimmy replying "It's all down to to you. Hey, I wouldn't be here if it wasn't for you"

Maybe Jimmy really didn't have a water bucket on him but it was so funny of him to casually turn to Tango whilst on fire and go "can you put me out?"

Jimmy being comically kidnapped??? (Actually being put into gay baby jail instead) And asking Tango to help save him

"You're still here? It's over. Go home. Go." (insert a bunch of crying emojis)

Other stuff: I think by virtue of Jimmy being a real tall guy, his character is usually depicted as taller than Tango's if not significantly so. As such... Tango calling Jimmy "little man" tickles me greatly and sounds like a very fond pet name

Briefly brought it up earlier but goddd. I will absolutely hc that Tango only became proud and defendant of his work because of how much Jimmy liked what he built. And Jimmy always being there and calming Tango in his crazed outbursts <3 Tango is such a goddamn creature isn't he

And the uhh... Tango dying quickest out of anyone because of a creeper, to then express that he was proud of Jimmy for doing well even though he got them killed the first time around, and then Jimmy unceremoniously dying to an Enderman to end their series for good... As funny and poetic as it is, god, the canary curse fuckin hurts!! And yet there were hardly times that Tango showed disdain towards Jimmy, and then never genuinely. He knew their series could end quick with Jimmy as his soulmate and even when their positivity faltered, their support towards one another never did

For having read all this (or maybe just glancing and scrolling)... some unfinished rancher doodles just for you that I made while watching their POV

:)

[intrepid-fictioneer-7]

How to read the Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Light Novels

I was recently reminded that there is a lot of people who simply don’t know that they can read the Case Files light novels, and that there are people who do know but have no idea where to find them. This is especially a problem when these people have only watched the anime and want to know where they can find more of the story. Since it kind of requires you to go through some hoops (not a whole lot but still), I decided to take a page out of @humbertozero​‘s excellent Fate/strange Fake resource post and make one for my other favorite Type-Moon Fate spinoff, the dossiers of El-Melon.

Read the First Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.1 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Second Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.2 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Third Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.3 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Fourth Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.4 (PDF) (EPUB1) (EPUB2)

Read the Fifth Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.5 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Sixth Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.6 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Seventh Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.7 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Eighth Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.8 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Ninth Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.9 (PDF) (EPUB)

Read the Tenth Volume: Lord El-Melloi II Case Files Vol.10 (PDF) (EPUB)

Important note!

It should be noted first that I am just the compiler here. I am neither the translator nor am I the files’ creator. So all credits go to...

Credits

Credits and thanks to TwilightsCall on the Beast Lair forums (from which the majority of the other creditors originally posted their contributions) for translating the first 4 volumes and some of volume 5, thus getting the ball rolling. Further thanks to azwhoisverybored for translating the rest of the series from volume 6 onwards, and thanks to Kneenaw for starting the translation for the rest of volume 5. Thanks to Dotelias for making EPUBs for volumes 1-3, thanks to  cereal_ for making EPUBs of volume 4, thanks to u/confusedkuratowski on Reddit for making EPUB of volume 6, and thanks to ProtoformX for making PDFs and EPUBs for volumes 5 to 10 as well as for Adventures volume 1!

And big thanks to Makoto Sanda for writing Case Files in the first place!

Further explanations

Anime

The anime adaptation of Case Files, with the mouthful of a title that is Lord El-Melloi II's Case Files: Rail Zeppelin Grace Note, is particular to use as an entry-point in the series, because it only partially adapts the series. See, the author, Makoto Sanda, said in interview that the two first arcs/cases in the series didn’t quite work as scripts for anime episodes, so the anime only adapted the third case/arc, Rail Zeppelin, which is more action oriented than the more mystery focused first arcs. But because they still needed to explain stuff like Gray, Reines, El-Melloi’s students, etc., many of whom are relevant characters to the arc, the first half/six episodes of the anime is about introducing them.

So to the question “where do I start reading after the anime?”, the answer is unironically to restart at volume 1. And then you may skip volumes 4-5 since they are the Rail Zeppelin arc and there are not much differences besides some characters not being present during that arc. This is why I think you can watch the anime first if that’s more your speed (I have my problems and criticisms of the anime but that’s irrelevant to this post).

And you can’t start with the anime and start reading with volume 6, the first 3 volumes have characters and plot points that come back for the final arc, so you’re gonna be incredibly lost if you think to consume the series this way.

Weirdly enough, despite being original episodes, the anime originals are most likely canon in some ways. Episode 0, the original OVA, is an expansion of an anecdote Gray mentions in the first volume’s prologue, and Episode 1 takes place during Waver’s travels before the story starts and is an actual story, one of the 3 incidents Sanda has in mind for Waver’s journey before he returned to London. Episodes 2 to 6 take place during the one month period between volume 3 and volume 4, and finally the special OVA take place on Christmas also in between arcs.

Manga

The manga has gorgeous art, but, at the time of writing, it is unfortunately only translated up to the second case right now. Still, go check it out.

The Adventures of El-Melloi II

The sequel series currently ongoing, started a year after the first Case Files ended in 2019. You might know it as “the (other) series where Rin shows up grown up and also a pirate”. @reignsan has been compiling pretty thorough chapter-by-chapter summaries of the volumes by @kaibutsushidousha if you don’t mind being spoiled. Or you can be patient and wait for azwhoisverybored to finish translating them on Beast Lair in this thread.

At the time of writing (27/07/23), the first volume of Adventures has been completed and compiled into PDF and EPUB forms.

Lord El-Melloi II Case Files material

This is absolutely not required reading in any shape or form, those lore books are usually of interest only to dumb nerds like me lol. A timeline of the Clock Tower? An explanation of its politics? Yes please. But it also has insights into the characters by the author that aren’t in the books proper, as well as behind-the-scenes explanations for some decisions (for example, why it’s Gray with the American spelling instead of Grey with the British spelling). Only the glossary/encyclopedia is translated, but give it a look...after you read the series, because it assumes you did and has some big spoilers.

Drama CD

What’s that? You heard something about a Buzzfeed quizz about the most handsome Clock Tower teachers and how it’s somehow a plot point? Look no further than one of my only posts that did numbers. Read the summary, it’s hilarious.