#might as well mark this as a damn PSA

[malka-lisitsa]

Why is your Katherine so obsessed with Stefan? I know she was obsessed with him in the show but you take it up a notch and it comes across as Stefan being Katherine's main personality trait. I think it leaves a poor taste for a woman's life to revolve around a man so much that it takes a big chunk of her autonomy. Stefan has done so much to her and it's overall a poor choice to me. I don't think Katherine - being the bad bitch that she is - would pine after Stefan after he has treated her in the worst ways :/

I thought about this all day, and I decided to answer it anyway so here goes.

Katherine is extremely obsessed with Stefan in the show too? Like the second she saw him that was her entire goal in life was to be with him? She watched him for 145 years while she planned her big break for freedom from Klaus so she could be with him for REAL- She ONLY came out of the shadows because Stefan started fucking around with Elena. "I came back for you." She literally screwed herself over revealing herself to them because of Stefan. She continues to help Stefan for the entire 3 year he absolutely treats her like shit.

Which btw she DOES fuck him up several times in retaliation but never stops trying to win him back even though he's spat in her face several times. She gets turned human literally tries to off herself and Stefan just says "Suck it up" and shes right back on the obsessive wagon to win Stefan back. He fucked her, snubbed her, literally SHATTERED HER ENTIRE WORLD- and she STILL snatched Elena's body with the goal of getting Stefan back. Which was the dumbest choice on her part- but you know what she was terrified of death, out of her damn MIND with paranoia and clinging to the thing she KNOWS makes her happier than anything else- STEFAN.

LITERALLY GETS SENT TO HELL AND COMES BACK AFTER STEFAN- So yes absolutely she pines after him despite all the shitty things he did to her.

The only thing that changes in my writing? Is I give the emotional insight to why she acts like that. The internal drive. The bond that she feels to him in detail as opposed to us just seeing her on screen saying she loves Stefan.

Katherine got Silas levels of the Doppelganger draw and it fucked her up badly. She absolutely was obsessed with Stefan she loves him more than anything or anyone. Katherine's goal has been LOVE since she was a human. She was literally a shadow of an extremely tragic love story. AND YET- while being completely bound to him in ways not even she fucking understands she still found a way to be the baddest bitch of all. She didnt LOSE anything by loving Stefan so hard. She CHOSE to dedicate everything she had to being with him because SHE WANTED her happy ending. Katherine decided what she wanted and KATHERINE went after it.

It didn't take anything away from her character at all and neither do I.

Saying Katherine is less of a bad bitch because she wants to be with Stefan so bad she acts a little stupid sometimes is the same bullshit as saying house wives are less than career women. Katherine decided what she wanted and she went for it. Just because she decided she wanted a man and not world domination doesnt take ANYTHING away from her. She was NEVER extremely ambitious she ONLY wanted to be HAPPY and STEFAN MADE HER HAPPY.

Katherine's main personality trait is that she wants her happy ending, she wants to be loved the way she loves, she wants to be able to keep and enjoy that love, and she wants what she fucking wants when she wants it. Shes a driven highly capable woman and her choice of main focus being Stefan doesnt take any of that shit away from her. Shes a BAD ASS with or without Stefan, but SHE wants STEFAN.

It would be so out of character to just have her decide she doesn't care that much and fuck off to do... what? Shes not a world domination type. She only wants safety and love- so if she ditched Stefan she'd just go after another lover. Oh wait like Elijah. And when that didnt work out she went right back to Stefan. So really idk what your beef is here. Katherine has always been a character whos main trait was she wants love. Just turns out the love she wants is Stefan's.

She makes shitty choices sometimes that get her in hot water regarding Stefan but none of her autonomy is ever taken from her unless Klaus is involved because he literally compels her. Katherine does what Katherine wants at all times PERIOD. Idk what kind of new age feminism you're trying to force on Katherine as a character but her being all about love and just wanting her happy ending doesn't make her any less of a bad ass and personally I think it's kinda sad that you'd say that.

Katherine was the fox that out ran the hound for 500 years both WITH and WITHOUT Stefan. She continued to thwart his plans and be a general thorn in his side, she continued to be the badest bitch, and an absolute legend ALL WHILE pining after Stefan. Katherine wanted to be happy and she knew Stefan made her happy. It takes nothing from her to have her goal be a happy ending with a man. Sorry that leaves a bad taste in your mouth but I will continue to keep her true to character and her love for Stefan in every verse it's applicable in thank you.

[gallavictorious]

i very much enjoyed your take about how mickey might have bottomed for other people than ian, because i personally find it very likely and it generally seems like an unpopular opinion. a lot of the time in fandom (not just this one) people seem to expect bottoming to be something super ~special~, and they tend to treat it like an act of indredible trust reserved for the love of your life, instead of a simple preference in bed. for some people it might be, i guess, but i've literally never met a bottom who feels that way. seems weird to me to expect mickey, of "liking what i like don't make me a bitch" fame, to be someone who thinks that. prison is different simply because in there he seems to see sex as a means of establishing dominance/power, not pleasure. idk that's just what makes sense to me

Hiya, nonnie!

I totally agree that the whole top/bottom discourse can get wildly out of hand (Johnlock shippers, I am looking at you), with all sorts of significance tied to who tops and who bottoms. It should be noted, however, that this doesn't just happen in fandom (even if it sometimes happens a lot in fandom) but that these discourses are prevalent in the ”real” world as well: there are all kinds of ideas floating around about what being a top or being a bottom says about you as a person and about your relationships. Rather than being construed as something that you do, it's often seen (primarily but not exclusively by straight people) as something that you are, and while I don't doubt that there are gay men who do identify strongly with being a top or a bottom, in my experience, as in yours, most don't particularly. It's one of many aspects of sex; it's a thing that you do; and one you might have a clear preference about, but you also might not. It isn't necessarily tied to trust, or at least not more so than any other sex act.

Disclaimer: I'm not actually a gay penis haver, I haven't done any extensive research on the topic, and I don't tend to discuss the details of my friends' sex life with them, so I don't know this. Anecdotal evidence, my dears. In general, however, I think it's a good practise to assume that what a person likes in bed doesn't necessarily say a lot about what sort of person they are, the same way having a certain type of food preference doesn't. (We're putting aside, for the moment, the fact that taste is often at least partially shaped by ones culture becuase I feel that will only muddy the waters on this particular topic.)

All that said – and this is where I suspect you'll stop enjoying my take; sorry about that, nonnie! – I think that for Mickey bottoming does have a lot to do about trust, at least initially. Not in the sense that it's something super special and precious that he wants to reserve for his one true love or anything like that, but in the sense that I believe that Mickey, as a result of the enviroment he grew up in, is very, very aware of the assumptions sometimes made about bottoms (usually by straight people). I've actually written halfway extensively about Mickey's relationship to his own sexuality before, so for a longer and even somewhat coherent explanation of my thougths on this, please check that out.

Here, let me just note that Mickey might well know that liking what he likes doesn't make him a bitch, but he's also highly cognizant of the fact that others might thinkit makes him a bitch, and he can't afford that (especially not in prison; I think his main motivation for fucking me there is mostly to just get off - and it's a good opportunity to actually do it with men without revealing himself as gay - rather than to establish dominance, but he exclusively tops because doing anything else would mark him as a bitch). Except with Ian he chooses to risk it, repeatedly, and I think that does signify a rather large amount of easy trust.

The thing is, though, that I think that after having what he had with Ian and living openly as a gay man, I think Mickey has come to a place of self-acceptance (and, significantly, to a place where the worst has already happened and he survived it) that allows him to truly not give a damn about what anybody but the people close to him assumes, which makes bottoming less of a trust thing and thus no longer something he only feels comfortable doing with Ian. (Which doesn't mean he's comfortable doing it with just anybody he's fucking; see Byron.) I have some thoughts about what this means for his stay in Mexico (LGTB+ unfriendly cartels and all), but I'll get back to that in response to another ask I got on this topic.

So yeah, I think that Mickey probably has bottomed for other people (and that this is a somewhat unpopular opinion in the fandom) but only after he had been in a proper and official relationship with Ian – and I do think that trust is a pretty important component of the whole thing in this particular case; not because bottoming is inherently something that requires extra special levels of trust, but because of Mickey's awareness of prevalent discourses surrounding it.

Finally, I want to note that we'll never know what Mickey did or didn't do before he hooked up with Ian, or what he did or didn't do while they were apart. We can argue one way or the other until the cows come home, and I think we can build a pretty strong case either way, but at the end of the day, it comes down to preferences and what we think makes for a more compelling interpreation. This is the one I vaguely favour (at this time, at least; I've been known to change my mind over time or if a more compelling theory is presented to me); if you prefer another, that's perfectly fine and reasonable. I'm very happy to discuss this and as always I'd love to hear other people's thoughts, but I'm not looking to get involved in any messy fights over it. (Not directed at you, btw, nonnie - loved the ask! Just a general PSA for others who might stumble across this!)

Oh, and other sweet nonnie who sent me an ask on this subject: I'll get back to you with a proper response within a few days! I've saved some thoughts especially for it, so while you already know that we don't fully agree on this, I hope you'll find it somewhat worthwhile. :)

[kbim]

Every Hero Has Their End(SWF)

During hero training at U.A, Y/N gets a disturbing phone call from home. And Bakugou Katsuki is there to soothe them however he can.

Warnings: Death, Established relationship, Comfort

PSA: I will be trying my best to make this a Gender-neutral and Quirk-Neutral Fic.

https://archiveofourown.org/works/28103730/chapters/69066837#workskin

      I've found out that the world is the most peaceful whenever I'm training at school; Watching as my classmates shout encouragements to each other, and knowing that right now, we are all oblivious to the chaos and bloodshed happening outside of these gym doors. Oblivious to how fast heroes are losing their grip on what faith the public has in them, and since All Might has stepped down they are losing it even faster.

"Oi, dumbass. You just gonna sit there and mope like an extra or are you gonna let me beat your ass to a pulp?" And this was my favorite part, the unbreakable wall of angry optimism; Bakugou. When I looked to face him he had poor Izuku in a headlock and was practically dragging him on the floor, Izuku was muttering about some kind of suit upgrade or maybe it was All Might? With him, it's always one of the two. "Cause this shitty nerd won't stop holding back."

I quickly flipped bakugou off. "Ya know that you don't need to call everyone names, it just makes you seem more like a kid" As I walked up to the pair I peeled Izuku from Bakugou's grasp, letting him drop to the floor. "And haven't you bullied Izuku enough." I reached my hand out to help him up. As he held onto my hand I could feel Bakugou's glare, he always hated it whenever I did 'relationship things' with other people. Even though this was just me helping the beating bag up.

"Thanks Y/N" Izuku quickly quipped out as he started whipping the dust and dirt off of his hero costume, unaware that he was still holding my hand. I didn't really care, I knew it was just an accident but I could feel Bakugou's glare shift down to where we were touching. He quickly stomped over and grabbed my wrist, ripping ti away from Izuku's.

"Tch. I thought I told you to stop touching TRASH." As Bakugou pulled you towards him he made sure that the last word was directed at Izuku, making sure it came off harsher. Izuku took the hint and left, quickly finding his squad over the other side of the gym. I gave a soft wave in his direction, as I did I could hear Bakugou huff and puff.

"You really need to work on your passiveness, I and Izuku are just friends. You know I have no interest in our class-mates." I patted his chest as I walked by him, going to continue my endurance training. Even though I was daydreaming and not really training, as I kicked at the rouble I made Bakugou came up behind me and wrapped his arms around my waist. placing my arms on top of his I leaned into him. "And don't worry, the term 'Class-mate' extends to all of the other classes as well." That earned a small chuckle from him.

"As your boyfriend, I have the right to mark you as mine, AND to keep shitty nerds away from you." He moved his hands away from me and turned me to face him, as I looked up to him I spotted multiple spots where Izuku had hit him. I would never say it to his face but, Izuku isn't the little weak kid that he knew before U.A. "And anyways I really wanted to fight someone on MY level." At that his face morphed into a large smirk, he grabbed onto my shoulders and threw me to the left. I wasn't prepared for such a movement and landed on my side.

"Dude, WHAT THE FUCK?!" Leaning onto my elbow, I looked at him. "You could at least give me a god damn warning" He quickly stalked over to me and stood over me.

"Nah."

Well, what a wonderful boyfriend... If he wanted a fight I'll give him a fight. I leaned back and kicked my legs up behind him, which kicked him over my head. As my legs held their momentum I flipped over to lay on my hands, laying in a lower push-up position. As he landed on his hands he activated his quirk and flipped to land on his feet unharmed. I went to activate my quirk to push me onto my feet but I found myself unable to use it. When I looked over to Bakugou he was wrapped up in Mr.Aizawa's capture 'scarf'. I got up to walk over to the pair.

"Y/N, you have a phone call. And next time please make sure to silence your cellular device during school, it interrupted my nap." He handed me my phone, which was showing an active call from my mother. "Now please don't make me have to get up again"

As he turned and started walking away he let go of Bakugou and deactivated his own quirk. "THANK YOU SENSAI!" I pulled the phone up to my face and quickly greeted my mother.

"Hey Y/N, h-how are you?" I could hear the presentation in her voice.

"Um, I'm a good mom. Not to rush you but what's with the call during school?"

"*Sigh* Well, I and your father just got the news that..... That ..." I grumbled, she knew not to call me during class and this was just taking too long.

"What do you NEED mom?" Oof, that came out kinda harsh.

"Oh, um. I just wanted to tell you, that. Your brother was fighting a villain downtown, and that. . . The villain delivered an a-a fatal blow to his head. And t-that when the other h-heros f-f-found him he w-was pronounced d-d-d-dead on arrival."

I heard my phone hit the ground, and I could feel myself drop to my knees. I don't recall telling my body to do so but my hand slapped over my mouth as I started sobbing. This couldn't be true, my elder brother had just gotten out of hero school and was fighting with the pros. They couldn't have failed him like that.

_____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

As Y/N was on the phone Kirishima had walked over to me, scolding me for the 'unmanly' move I pulled on Y/N. Saying a true man doesn't attack like that. I didn't care too much about it, in the heat of battle, a hero does everything they can to stop the villain. He doesn't have to be manly about it, he just has to get the job done. As I peaked around Shitty Hair I could see you drop your phone and fall onto your knees. Tears were streaming down your face, I could hear the muffled sobs from all the way over here.

As I grabbed Shitty Hair's shoulder a pushed him to the side, with much less force as when I did it to you earlier. I couldn't control what pace I was going at but I felt my feet hit the ground as I ran towards you. When I got closer to you I slid onto my knees to slow myself down, it was quite effective If I must say.

"Y/N?! What's wrong? Why are you crying?!" I pulled you into my chest and reached for your phone. The screen was cracked but I could still see the call active. I brought it up to my face. "Who are you and what the hell did you say to Y/N?!"

"I-i'm their mother, and I-I h-had informed them t-t-that their brot-t-ther had d-d-died in combat with a v-vll--ian today." Oh Shit. I hung up the phone and wrapped my arms around y/n, they sobbed into my hero suit. When the others run up around us I tightened my grip onto y/n.

"As the class rep, I deserve to know when one of our classmates are in trouble" "Bakugou! What's wrong with y/n?" "Did they get hurt?" "Oh shit man" "What should we do? "What happened?" "Kacchan What happened? "I bet Bakugou said something to them." "Ribbit, I'll get Mr. Aizawa"

"Back the FUCK off, they brother just fucking died man." y/n tensed up and started sobbing louder. I followed my brow and squeezed them. "Shit" I moved you to rest against my chest sideways and moved my arm to hold your bridal style. I stood up and pushed through the extras and made my way towards the gym doors. I could feel their tears soaking my suit, they gripped and released the loose cloth as a stepped through the doors. I could hear the others call after me but I had to intention of stopping for them.

When I got up from my room at the dorms and placed them down onto the bed. As I laid down next to them I covered us both with the blankets.

[vventure]

Naughty Angel

Characters: Monoma Neito x f!reader

Prompt: “Your ass is going to be seven different shades of red after that little stunt.”

All characters are aged-up to 20+!

Warnings: Smutty Road head, alcohol consumption, D/s dynamic, swearing

Word Count: 2.9k

[F/n] is for first name, and [L/n] is for last name (I usually use [y/n] but then when I was editing I realized I included a last name)

A/N: I h/c Monoma as being a softer dom in his relationship, and also that he’s past his hate for class A once he’s left school, but still can be jealous. BTW DO NOT DO ROAD HEAD. That’s my PSA. I included it here because this is a fictional universe. I’m more than open to continuing this particular story to when they get home from the party, but I’m nervous about writing that bit of smut, so it might take me a bit. Hope you guys enjoy it! 

“Neito, babe?” She called from the bedroom she and Neito Monoma had been sharing for just over a year. “I need help.”

The blond-haired man sauntered into the room, taking his time to run his eyes up and down her body that was partially clothed in a tight black dress. He had been lucky enough to see her like this a few times since they started dating, galas and parties were important for pro-heroes, but each time his heart hammered in his chest when he saw her dressed to the nines. Right now it looked like she was struggling with a piece of black lace that was meant to wrap around her neck, creating a sensual keyhole opening on her chest and back, her cleavage on full display. He grumbled slightly that anyone at the party was going to see her like this, but acquiesced and stepped behind her to do up the buttons. 

Neito’s hands brushing against her neck made [F/n] sigh in contentment, and the copycat hero chuckled, sucking a mark into the space that would be covered by the cloth he was doing-up. 

“Neito!”

“What? It was too tempting. Your skin is just so soft,” he replied, leaving open mouth kisses on her upper back once he’d finished buttoning. Dressed in his nicest suit, a jet black two-piece with a green and royal blue patterned pocket square, Neito was getting antsy to get out the door and to the gala that he’d agreed to attend; he hated being late. 

“I guess I’m ready,” she said, spinning in her royal blue heels to face her boyfriend. They’d coordinated their outfits, since Neito always wanted to be the best dressed. Slinging her arms lazily over his shoulders she gave him a sweet peck on the lips, wiping away the red lipstick that transferred. 

“We still have time,” Neito replied, pulling her taut against his body, hands running up and down the sides of her dress. “Plus, I have something for you that I think would complete this ravishing outfit.”

Neito took her hand and led her into the living area of their modern apartment. On the countertop of their breakfast bar sat a long, blue-velvet box with gold trim. He walked over and picked it up, returning to [F/n] and flipping the lid open. Inside was a tear-drop shaped emerald hanging from a long gold chain. Clapping her hand over her mouth, [F/n] pulled the necklace from its box and turned so Neito could do the honors of clasping it around her neck. Weaving the thin chain underneath her done-up neckline, Neito clasped it, and it hung heavily right above her cleavage.

“I love it, Neito,” she said, walking over to the full-length mirror by their front door and admiring her completed outfit. “You didn’t have to do this.”

“I want everyone to know who you belong to. A collar seemed tacky.”

A laugh escaped his lips as [F/n] gave him a good-humored glare over her shoulder, before spinning and walking over to muffle his laugh with her mouth. People probably wouldn’t know that the emerald adorning her was Neito’s birthstone, but she loved his commitment to showing her off all the same; plus she was damn glad that he wasn’t having her wear a collar out in public. Neito pulled her in close again, his hands running down her back to cup her ass, which he gave a gentle squeeze and slap to, making her giggle.

“Let’s get out of here, it’s unfair that I should keep such beauty all to myself. Remember, they can look but they can’t touch,” he said, a hint of an edge to his voice. This made her wonder just who would be at this gala to get him to act so possessively. She would never say no to him treating her like a queen, but did feel a flutter of concern about how he’d act at the party if he was already getting riled up just thinking about it.

The couple exited their apartment building hand-in-hand, heading for the sleek blue sports car waiting on the curb. Neito opened the passenger door and [F/n] stepped into the black interior, situating herself as best she could in the tight dress and buckling her seatbelt. Neito walked around the car and hopped into the driver’s seat, turning the car on and shifting it into gear. Once he’d situated his hand on the steering wheel, he took [F/n]’s hand into his own and placed a gentle kiss on her knuckles.

“I’m glad we’re finally in the car, because all I want to do is rip that dress off you,” he mumbled into the top of her hand. She blushed a deep red, slipping her hand out of his so she could palm his thigh through the soft material of his suit. His lithe muscles rippled as she massaged up and down his leg, reaching ever closer to his crotch.

“That’s rather unfair, [F/n],” he growled, his eyes never leaving the road as they shot through the city. “I can’t hide what you do to me as well as you can.”

“Then I guess you’ll have to let me take care of it before we get to the party,” she smiled mischievously. Neito groaned as she undid the zipper on his pants, the material yawning open as his prominent bulge threatened to jump out. She worked his cock out from between the opening in his boxer-briefs, and he hissed as the airconditioning of the car hit his bare skin. Licking the bead of precum from the slit at the reddened top of his member, she laved her tongue down his length as far as the restricting clothing would allow her to. Her tongue ran up the underside of his dick, pressing deliciously against the vein there, and Neito choked on his moan.

“You have five minutes until we get there, stop being such a fucking tease.”

With that, she swallowed a few times to prep herself mentally more than physically and took all of his length into her mouth, his throbbing tip hitting the back of her throat. She hollowed her cheeks and ran the tip of her tongue along him as she bobbed up and down; her bottom teeth ran along the side of his cock in the way she knew he liked. As she pressed his member as far as she could into her mouth, Neito swerved and the car dipped sharply into a pothole, his cock forcing its way down her throat causing her to choke while tears came to her eyes as he groaned wantonly. 

“Fuck, sorry pet, I couldn’t avoid i—ah,” he said teasingly before she wrapped her hand around the base of his cock, coming up for air and stroking up and down it using her saliva to reduce the friction. 

“You’re such a bad liar, Neito,” she replied, continuing to pump him. Leaning down, she sucked the head of his dick into her mouth and pressed her tongue against the slit at the tip. He moaned and slammed his head back against the headrest, his eyes remaining on the road; she knew she had him. Pressing him into her mouth all the way down to her hand, she sucked feverishly and grazed her teeth against his bottom vein until he was bucking against her. 

“Ah—fuck—I’m c-cumming,” he panted. “Don’t get any on this nice suit, angel.”

His hot seed shot down her throat to punctuate his words, threatening to make her choke by the sheer volume, but she pushed through it. A single tear rolled down her face as she swallowed every drop that he was pumping out before pulling off him with a delicious pop. Using one of the tissues Neito kept in his car, she wiped her saliva off his slowly softening member before moving it back under his clothing and zipping his pants. [F/n] pressed a fresh tissue to her cheek, mopping up the tear as she looked into the lighted mirror in the car to ensure her makeup was intact. 

“You are in so much trouble, making me cum in my nice car,” he growled, shooting her a slightly-dazed yet still dangerous look. She sat there smugly, watching as he pulled into the valet line at the hotel. Neito stepped from the car, adjusting himself discreetly before handing his keys to the valet. He walked around the front of the car and pulled open her door, lifting her from her seat and slamming the door shut. Pressing her against the side of the car, he pulled her in for a hungry kiss, his tongue delving into her mouth where he could taste himself; he pulled away groaning.

“You just can’t help yourself, can you?”

“I needed something to tide me over for this party, until I have you all to myself” she replied, palming him through his pants. 

“Are you trying to get punished?”

“So what if I was?”

“You’re such a brat,” he growled, pulling her lower lip into his mouth. “Let’s get this over with, so I can teach you a lesson.” 

She wiped his mouth yet again, clearing away as much of the lipstick she’d left behind as she could before reapplying hers and allowing him to take her hand and drag her into the hotel’s lobby. It was decked-out in black, white, and gold and felt absolutely ritzy. A private ballroom was off to the left of the lobby, and that's where Neito led [F/n], telling the bouncer his name and walked past him. The ballroom was decorated in the same manner as the entrance way, but it was lit only by purple lights, giving it a royal feel. 

Gasping in slight awe, she allowed herself to be pulled to the bar where Neito ordered himself a  sake blossom and then handed [F/n] her favorite drink. She took a tentative sip and then smiled lovingly at Neito, which he returned before realizing they were in public. He could be so affectionate when he wanted to be, and [F/n] loved that well-hidden side of him, as well as his brazen side.

“Phantom Thief!” An older man exclaimed from behind Neito. Turning, Neito put on a show-stopping smile and shook the man’s hand. They launched into a conversation that did not involve [F/n], so she busied herself by looking around the ballroom to people-watch. Several pro heroes were scattered around the large area, including Red Riot, Ground Zero, and number one hero Deku. Feeling her heart clench in her chest, she couldn’t peel her eyes away from the red-haired chivalrous hero in his slick navy suit. He’d been her favorite since his showing at the U.A. Sports Festival that she’d watched from home with her family in high school.

Caressing Neito’s elbow, he looked over his shoulder at her and she motioned that she was going to walk around the party a bit; she was dying to meet the other pros, but didn’t need her jealous boyfriend to know that. Besides, she wanted him to punish her tonight and she knew all the best ways to get him pissed. She walked confidently over to Red Riot, a smile beaming on her face as she approached the hero. He turned to look at her and matched her smile, the wattage of it nearly blinding her.

“You’re Red Riot, right?” She asked, suddenly feeling a little shy. “I’m a huge fan!”

“You can call me Kirishima,” he replied, extending his hand. Placing her hand in his, she gasped and flushed as he pulled it up to place a chaste kiss to her knuckles, much like Neito had done in the car. “A beauty like you shouldn’t be here all alone with no one to enjoy her company, what’s your name?”

Was Red Riot flirting with her? Her voice caught in her throat as she stared at the strong hero before her. 

“M-my names [L/n] [F/n], you can just call me [F/n], though.”

“Alright! Would you like to dance, [F/n]?” He asked, pulling her from her stupor.

“I’d love to,” she replied, allowing him to sweep her onto the black and white dance floor. He smiled at her as he pulled her into a leisurely waltz, taking every chance he could to twirl her around. 

“Wow, Red Riot,” she gasped out after the first spin.

“Please, like I said, call me Kirishima,” he said with a smile. “What brings you to the gala?”

“Oh, well, I just really love to support children’s charities,” [F/n] bent the truth with ease. If she brought up Neito, Eijirou would cut off the dance and she was really enjoying his company. It wasn’t technically a lie that she supported children’s charities; she loved seeing those in need get the help they deserved.

“Oh that’s awesome, the world needs more heroes like you.”

[F/n] thought she would melt on the spot. Did Red Riot just call her a hero? She caught sight of Neito over Eijirou’s shoulder; his hand was gripping his drink glass so hard that his knuckles showed through his pale skin. 

“That’s awfully kind of you to say, but I’m just another regular person,” she said, turning her attention back to her dance partner. “I don’t hold a candle to you and your comrades.”

“Don’t sell yourself short, [F/n],” Kirishima said, eliciting a brilliant blush from her.

The song was over before she knew it and she was out of breath and giggling along with Kirishima as they left the floor.

“You are an incredible dancer,” she said, smiling at the red head. He smiled back sheepishly and rubbed his neck.

“I had a good teacher in highschool,” he replied. “You’re not so bad yourself.”

“Ballroom dancing is a little hobby of mine.” 

Neito was teaching her in their apartment every night. He had a passion for it, and talked her into it by saying it would be great exercise, and he’d get to stare at her beautiful face for so long without interruption. How could she say no to that? The image of Neito swirling her around their cleared out living room as she learned to dance popped into her head, and she looked around for him. It didn’t take her long to spot him, since he was storming towards her, his ears red and eyes filled with anger and jealousy; she’d accomplished her goal.

“I see you’ve met my girlfriend, Kirishima,” Neito all but spat at the other hero as he snaked his hand around her waist, pulling her flush against his side. She placed her left hand on his chest and looked up at him, a smirk pulling at her lips.

“Monoma! It’s been so long, glad to see you’re doing good!” Kirishima exclaimed. The chivalrous hero’s face was flushing with embarrassment, especially since he’d flirted and danced with her. “I didn’t know [F/n] was your girlfriend, she’s an awesome dancer.”

“Neito’s been teaching me to dance in our apartment during our spare time,” she said, moving her right hand along Neito’s back in a comforting motion. “He’s so athletic.”

“Don’t touch what’s mine again,” Neito abruptly barked at Kirishima, [F/n] gasped, slapping him softly on the chest, he just took that hand in his. “And if you ever have the honor of seeing her again, you can call her Mono--I mean, [L/n].”

“Oh, okay bro, jeez, sorry,” Kirishima stuttered out. “I didn’t know she was with you. She’s not an object, you know. She can make her own choices.”

“She knows exactly what she’s doing. Now, if you’ll excuse us I think I deserve a dance.”

The music turned to that of a Tango, and [F/n]’s legs felt like they were going to stop working as Neito led her to the dance floor for a second round. They’d only just begun learning the Tango, so the chances of her stomping all over his feet were monumental.

“Neito, I’m not good at the Tango, can’t we wait until the next song? I’m going to look like an idiot,” her cheeks were on fire as he swung her to face him, jealousy evident in his eyes.

“So you’d rather dance with that brute?”

“That’s not what I said--” He cut her off with a dip, his lips brushing against her ear and his hand gripping her waist tightly.

“Your ass is going to be seven different shades of red after that little stunt.”

In a daze, she stumbled through a silent dance with Neito. He had her pressed to him as much as he could and she could feel his hardened member against her crotch every time. His eyes were filled with lust and anger once the song came to an end. Spinning her around and pressing her ass to his crotch, he walked her back over to where Kirishima was standing with Ground Zero and Deku.

“Well, boys, we’ll be seeing you,” he said jovially. His smile didn’t reach his eyes. “Say goodbye to Red Riot, pet.”

“It was really nice to meet you, Kirishima,” [F/n] said, yelping a little when Neito pressed his fingers harder into her sides as a warning. “I mean--Red Riot.”

“You’re still crazy, Monoma,” Deku said, clearly feeling uncomfortable. Neito let out a quick laugh before releasing [F/n]’s hips and grabbing her hand to head to the car.

Neito wrapped her in his arms as they waited outside for his car to be returned by the valet. She buried her face into his chest and breathed in his light cologne while his hands massaged her ass through her dress. He was feeling jealous and horny, and from his threat earlier she knew tonight would be a whole new type of punishment.

[clexa--warrior]

There’s a new group of villains on Fear The Walking Dead.

Well not entirely new. These are the same people who’ve been scrawling “The end is the beginning” everywhere. The same people with the submarine who are looking for Morgan who took the Magical Key from the bounty hunter way back at the beginning of Season 6.

I admit, I’m just kind of tired at this point. Tired of all the bullshit and bad writing and the tedious characters and the predictable stories. Tired of the parade of mediocre villains. Bone weary. And yet here I am, still reviewing this damn show.

Let’s take a little walk down memory lane, shall we?

TV’s Greatest Villains

At the beginning of Season 5, after the Most Horrible Villain Of Any Walking Dead Show was taken care of at long last, we got a new group of bad guys who . . . just wanted their warehouse back? And directions to an oil refinery?

Truly, these were now The Most Horrible Villains Of Any Walking Dead Show Ever.

Logan (played by a woefully underutilized Matt Frewer) was the head honcho of these bad apples and he fooled Morgan’s group into flying a plane they didn’t know how to fly far, far away to help some strangers in another part of the vast continent of Texas. Then he . . . moved back into his warehouse! The bastard.

After half a season of trying to fix the plane so they could fly back across the Pacific Ocean (which we all know separates the two halves of Texas) Logan tries to pretend like he’s a decent guy and fools the Morganites into showing him where the oil refinery is. Dastardly Logan! Then, just when Morgan and Logan decide that their names are similar enough that they might as well be friends, the Rangers show up!

They show up on horses with rifles and expertly kill Logan and every single member of his crew but for reasons (reasons!) they spare Morgan and the Morganites. It turns out that Logan was working for the evil witch queen of Lawton, Virginia—Truly The Most Horrible Villain Of Any Walking Dead Show Ever (Seriously). She is so evil that she kills the people working for her, who helped lead her to the oil refinery, and spared some people she didn’t know who weren’t loyal to her at all for reasons.

Yes, you heard me. Reasons! You don’t get to know the reasons. That’s not how scripts work. Scripts are supposed to be confusing, opaque and riddled with plot holes and inexplicable character choices.

Anyways, Virginia and the Rangers with their horses and their cowboy hats and their idyllic Texas aesthetic become the new Big Bads sometime in the second half of Season 5. Morgan and Friends make a PSA documentary to make sure anyone wandering from gas station to gas station is able to know who to call (GHOSTBUSTERS!) if they’re in trouble (which, like, yeah it’s a zombie apocalypse) because Morgan really wants to make up for all the bad things he’s done and so do all his friends.

Virginia is very mean, though, and so she makes a PSA, too, and that pisses Morgan off so bad that he takes his people far, far away to an abandoned Western-themed park-town filled with zombies and they make another PSA on the way that’s even more amazing and magical but a dude dies making it, marking the Best Walking Dead Death of All Time in the process. Seriously a dude decides it’s so important to film a selfie shot for the PSA that he dies when a bridge that’s collapsing surprisingly collapses! And then everyone is very sad!

Then, uh, after a spell at the new town that has no resources or water because it’s a theme park town instead of a real town, Wes and Alicia paint some stuff and June and John Dorie get married and Daniel plays some guitar and sings and Frank Dillane is like “Holy shit I’m so glad I bailed on this show” and then Virginia comes because Morgan calls her because instead of walking somewhere else they decide they should call the Evil Witch Queen Of Lawton so she can rescue them by splitting them all up (even Skidmark the cat!) and then the season ends with Morgan getting swarmed by zombies but don’t worry he’s still alive and they’ll tell us as much in a trailer that comes out before Season 6 because AMC is criminally addicted to spoiling their own shows for no reason on social media and . . . and . . .

Somewhere between Season 5’s finale and Season 6’s premiere AMC and showrunners Ian Goldberg and Andrew Chambliss must have put their heads together with Scott Gimple and decided that the Rangers and Virginia were actually super dull villains, just like the last few villains (I skipped the whole Vultures plot because they were actually so stupid they put the stadium under siege but still let Madison and co. go out scavenging because somehow they never read the Siege 101 manual or something).

Anyways, for reasons that must be obvious by now, somebody must have pointed out that Virginia is not a very good villain after all, partly because she’s just not that convincing but mostly because she made a goddamn copycat PSA and someone thought that was actually a cool story because there is no God and life’s not fair and this is also why we can’t have nice things, son.

And they must have realized that the Rangers are a like a cartoon version of what might happen in Texas after a zombie outbreak (just compare this clown show to the far more realistic Vatos gang from Season 1 of The Walking Dead). All these realizations must have felt strangely repetitive after what I can only imagine were similar revelations about Martha, the Vultures and Logan. So many revelations, so little useful insight or meaningful changes!

The Believers

In any case, they had June kill Virginia after a weird series of events that also saw one of the only good characters left on this godforsaken show get killed by yet another brat, and came up with The Believers, a group almost entirely inspired by The Monkees. These totally realistic folk live underground where they grow crops and embalm zombies and talk about how you need to be able to “see” when you look at this one creepy zombie they have entwined in vines in their basement. They’re led by a guy named Teddy played by John Glover who must really be down on his luck to take a role on this ridiculous show, though he’s actually creepy as a villain so that’s something. But no, I’m not going to feel any hope or optimism because fool me once shame on me, fool me again and George W. Bush, man. He has something to say about this.

Wes and Alicia and Al and Luciana all find their way to these people. I honestly can’t remember how they found them, but they show up to scout things out. They get interviewed like we’re back in Alexandria. Things go bad when Wes runs into his long-lost brother and ends up killing him after a scuffle over a gun. Wes’s brother has had a little too much of that Kool-Aid if you know what I mean. Wes isn’t too shook up about it. Remember when the entire brothers Dixon conflict between Merle and Daryl played out over the course of one single episode of The Walking Dead? Yeah, me neither.

Luciana says stuff because she’s still on this show for some reason. She says stuff a few times and people say stuff back to her. Al checks an embalmed zombie with a helmet on thinking it might be her lover girl from Season 5, because you totally embalm zombies with their helmets still on, but it’s not. Boy I was really worried there for a second!

Alicia sets the embalmed zombies on fire so they can get away and the others escape but Alicia doesn’t and then she has to have a whole entire conversation with Teddy and it’s pretty damn awkward when she tells him “You wanna kill me? That’s not gonna happen.”

Teddy’s like “whoa damn I was going to kill you but now that’s not going to happen crap” and Alicia’s like “So there, Teddy. You jerk face with your crazy-man beard.”

He knows something about Madison somehow. And he wants to “save you, Alicia” but “I don’t need saving” she tells him and then he talks in more cryptic circles. Teddy’s been looking for someone like Alicia for a long, long time and she’s like “listen old man at least I got some lines this episode!” which, to be fair, is true.

THE END. CREDITS ROLL.

Verdict

Yes, I am clearly mocking just about everything about this show. But I didn’t come up with this crap. I didn’t come up with Martha and the ethanol, or the plane and the beer-balloon, or Totally Pointless Logan, or Ginny and her boring ass cowboys. Maybe Teddy will be a better villain than all these. To be fair, he is a better villain already in a lot of ways. Then again, the bar set by the Vultures, Martha, Logan and Virginia is not very high. It’s so low, it’s less a bar and more of a speed bump.

So while Teddy is far more intriguing than the rest, and it’s even possible that Glover’s brief appearance here in this episode was better than the sum of all the other villains in this show since Season 4, I imagine they’ll find a way to screw him up also and then, as soon as he’s worn out his welcome, replace him with some other group of bad guys. The Shouters, a group of post-apocalyptic crazy people who wear zombie faces and shout at each other really loud, led by a bald woman named Alphapha.

Here’s the thing.

We need more than just Good Guys vs Bad Guys. There are other struggles to work with in fiction. Friction between the group that causes realistic, compelling internal strife. Survival against the elements and just the struggle of surviving in a world laid low by a pandemic, maybe without creature comforts like walkie-goddamn-talkies. Or perhaps a compelling story about a survivalist group at odds with a Native American tribe over water rights, whose intertwined family histories are marred by murder and revenge, where our heroes find themselves torn between both sides of a bloody fight they know very little about.

Yeah, what a notion.

Like I said at the very top of this review, I’m tired. I’m tired of Fear The Walking Dead. I’m tired of the same crap happening over and over again, another absurd bad guys who ultimately make the same fatal choice: They mess with Morgan Jones. NOBODY messes with Morgan Jones.

Maybe Morgan can make a PSA about how mean and delusional Teddy is and then Teddy can make a PSA about how The End Is The Beginning, Actually, Morgan You Twit. It’s just all nonsense at this point and it has been since the end of Season 3. We aren’t dealing with actual stories about real people. We’re watching a cartoon with two-dimensional cartoon villains and a bunch of uninteresting flat characters. Except a cartoon would be more fun.

What is the point of this show now? It’s like a goofier version of The Walking Dead, which also suffers from too many villain groups at this point and too many characters but not this level of crappy writing (usually).

Let me predict the plot for the remainder of Season 6 and likely part of Season 7 if AMC is actually going to let the current showrunners continue driving this show into the ground:

Teddy wants the key from Morgan so he can use it to activate the nuclear bombs on the nuclear sub that’s in the middle of Texas (because Texas, you recall, is separated by the Pacific Ocean which has dried up because ZOMBIES and the sub is there now). He wants to nuke the planet because he wants to save everyone because they’re weak probably. From this nuclear wasteland, new life will spring eternal and his cult—well protected in their underground parking garage with their cute little gardens—will be the new rulers of the world. Or at least of Texas which—we know because of geography class—accounts for approximately 57% of Earth’s land mass.

Look, I’m sorry. I’m really truly sorry but if this show continues to be a joke I don’t know why we should take it seriously. A mocking review if only fitting for a show that continues to make a mockery of itself. AMC has the resources and the wherewithal to produce a better zombie show and quite frankly audiences deserve one. There was nothing fundamentally awful about “The Holding” so I’m honestly not fully sure why I’m in such a snarky mind frame, but there was nothing very good about, either, and it’s just plain as day to me that they’re already falling into the same traps they keep falling into over and over and over again. Meet the new bad guy, same as the old bad guy. It’s all so predictable.

Because they don’t really learn from their mistakes, or because even if they do they just don’t know how to course correct. That’s the problem when you just don’t have much talent but nobody steps in and says “enough is enough!”

Because seriously, my droogies, enough is enough already.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 221: What’s Up, Doc

Previously on BnHA: We caught up with everyone’s favorite squad of homicidal misfits some six-odd weeks before the start of the current arc. Tomura and the gang were straight up broke, squatting in a condemned building somewhere out in the mountains and raiding racist secret societies to steal their shit. As it turns out, having no money and no sense of direction or purpose starts to weigh on one’s soul after a while, and Spinner in particular seemed to be having a bit of a hard time, since he only joined the League because of Stain. Just when it looked like we might be in for a bit of internal strife, our friend Gigantomachia literally tore the door down, announced he was there to meet AFO’s successor, and then demanded for him to prove that he was worthy. Which is how the League found themselves getting their asses kicked by this sobbing giant rock man as he lamented over how weak they were. The chapter ended with Giganto’s discarded radio trying to get Tomura’s attention. Apparently the voice on the other end belongs to none other than AFO’s personal physician, a mysterious man known only as “the doctor” who is behind the creation of the Noumus.

Today on BnHA: The doc explains that Gigantomachia is All for One’s former bodyguard and one of the people AFO trusted the most. AFO hid him away a few years back, anticipating his own eventual defeat. Unfortunately, Giganto’s unfailing loyalty to AFO has made him unwilling to accept anyone who doesn’t live up to his former master. For the time being, the doc calms him down by playing a recording of AFO’s voice. He then proceeds to teleport the entire League to his hideout using the black sludge warping quirk. Over at the hideout, we see that the doc is in fact the spitting image of Deku’s old doctor from chapter 1, pretty much confirming a long-held fan theory. Also, this dude’s got no fewer than 12 motherfucking High-End Noumus floating around in tanks. The doc introduces himself as Ujiko Daruma (which even he admits is a fake name), and he tells Tomura that he summoned him and his gang because he wants Tomura to prove he’s worth. Anyway so during this chapter I proceeded to lose my shit like 1700 times, and tbh even rereading it now it still gets me hyped up. Oh my freaking god.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my mostly-unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’m caught up with the manga now at chapter 226, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

oh my god

safe to say that “hyped as fuck” is a pretty accurate description of what I’m feeling right now

lol what the

Horikoshi, PSA, that’s not how radios work. were you perhaps thinking of cell phones? or walkie-talkies??

then again I suppose this might be some fancy schmancy radio FROM THE FUTURE or whatever

oh shit Tomura ain’t even joking though

giganto smash

I can’t believe Shigaraki Tomura is fucking dead. so much for your successor AFO

nah just kidding, he’s fine, at least presuming that he’s able to somehow land safely after all... this

guess we know what happened to poor Naomasa and that mountainside now

anyway, so guys. shit like this? is why Deku fucking needs to power the fuck up though. friendly reminder that the current #1 hero almost lost to fucking Hide and Seek Noumu. meanwhile this guy is out here leveling countrysides with a single Goron Pound. even Gran Torino wasn’t able to touch him. literally if our boy doesn’t get his Avatar State on soon the heroes are going to be in very bad shape here

anyway, so Giganto is still sobbing, and shouting to All for One (he can’t hear you, bro) that he wants to accept Tomura but he just can’t

okay but consider reading chapters 159 and 160 and then coming back and letting me know if you’ve had a change of heart. I’m just saying. he fucked up Overhaul something fierce and he deserves some credit. even if it was all just so he could steal Overhaul’s evil plan all for himself. because he has yet to come up with any kind of decent evil plan of his own. because between you and me, I don’t think he’s quite cut out for -- you know what, shit. maybe you’re onto something after all

so now Tomura is having a hilarious conversation with this sobbing rock man and a radio while still in mid-air

-- RECORD SCRATCH. FREEZE FRAME

SAY WHAT NOW. BACK THE FUCK UP, PRAYTELL??

are you saying this guy is the original Talking Noumu?? did AFO give him multiple quirks? is he like Wolverine or something and he’s got like a healing factor that can take a licking and keep on ticking? so they got all excited and loaded him up? ARE YOU EVEN REALLY MADE OF ROCK, FRIEND, OR IS THAT JUST ANOTHER ONE OF YOUR LIES

(ETA: I think this translation is wrong, actually; Viz’s translation says that Giganto is strong enough to be AFO’s bodyguard even without multiple quirks. in other words, he’s as strong as a Noumu without actually being one. which is arguably just as much of a shocking statement though.)

anyway so What’s Up Doc is continuing to explain Giganto’s life story so let’s un-freeze that frame

more evidence that AFO was taking steps to ensure himself a line of succession even before meeting Tomura. AFO have you ever seen Guardians of the Galaxy 2? spoiler alert, you know how Peter’s dad went and had a bunch of kids with people of all different species in order to try and create offspring that carried the same power as him, so he could use them to destroy the galaxy and shit? well my question for you is Did You Do That Exact Same Thing, Minus The Galaxy-Destroying Part. huh. huh

anyway now Dabi’s weighing in

and What’s Up Doc is all

“yep! we fucked up!!”

lol he says Giganto’s loyalty is too strong for his own good. went a bit overboard did we AFO

and nice lowkey Tomura burn as well. he says that Giganto is despairing at the “huge gap” between AFO and Tomura

so now Dabi is all “okay so we just have to do our best to kick his ass until he likes us?”

and he’s firing some flames, looking like he’s not exactly opposed to the thought

but WUD is saying that’s impossible, oh damn

what the

the hell was that click?? did he just hang up??

doesn’t seem that way, so... hmm. does he maybe have Giganto conditioned to respond to certain sounds or something? Pavlov-style?

(ETA: this really reminds me of the Avengers doing that “hey big guy, sun’s getting real low” lullaby thing with the Hulk lol.)

did he just shrink back down to size

um, what

should we... give him a moment

ohhhhhhhhhh

well that explains it then. no wonder they had him with the radio strapped around his neck

I wonder what would happen if they found out Mina was also capable of calming him down. Giganto whisperer. if SIXQUIRKS Deku ultimately fails, she may just be our last hope

and Tomura, shush. we’ve been waiting for him to join your party since chapter 50-something. this is literally years in the making. it took you time to warm up to your other misfits too, so you shut up and you deal with it

last observation before I click to the next page: is Giganto not wearing any pants. because. it looks to me like he’s not wearing any pants. just saying. um. ...

(ETA: you guys this makes me so uncomfortable though.)

OH SHIT WUD is calling Tomura out!!

AS THE PHILOSOPHER JAGGER ONCE SAID, “YOU CAN’T ALWAYS GET WHAT YOU WANT”

fucking look at that halo of realization surrounding Tomura at this concept, though

wow he’s taking it better than I thought though

I’m not sure what Tomura’s relationship with WUD is, but up until this point I can’t recall him ever actually listening to another character and not throwing a tantrum even when they tell him something he doesn’t want to hear. like, he listened to Kurogiri more or less, but bitched about it endlessly when he didn’t like it. and even with AFO he would whine until he got his way

and yet here WUD is straight up telling him “AFO done spoiled you, kid” and he’s just like “ouch. that’s pretty harsh” but at the same time just... accepting it. Tomura you’ve done quite a bit of growing up, haven’t you?

and I think part of it is also that he’s probably been coming to these realizations on his own as well, but not really wanting to accept them yet. but he’s not stupid; what with their recent troubles it was probably starting to sink in just how good he’d had it earlier

anyway, so now WUD is saying “a moment please” and I guess he’s going off to do something

DFAKLSDJFLAKSD

HOLY SHIT IT’S THE BLACK OOZE WARP AGAIN

ARE WE FINALLY GOING TO MEET THE MYSTERIOUS UJIKO PLEASE SAY YES OH MY GOD OH SHIT

holy shit

so even they don’t know what’s going on. well I’m glad that someone is finally having the same freaking-the-fuck-out reaction that I did back in chapter 191 but no one else seemed to share my shock or concern even though WHAT THE FUCK YOU GUYS

so quick reminder that this quirk works by teleporting the user a short-range distance (supposedly; I think the limit was 5km) either toward the quirk-user, or toward someone with whom the user is well-acquainted with. so presumably that means that whoever’s using the quirk is closer to them than they think, and also this person is with the doc right now

(ETA: though on further reflection I think that AFO’s may have just had limited range because he’d just acquired it. it must be one of those quirks that you can power up with time and practice. 5km is way too limited of a range given how this quirk has been used the last few times we’ve seen it.)

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

HOLY SHIT IT REALLY IS HIM!?!?!

holy fucking shit holy shit oh my god holy shit

this is Deku’s quirk doctor. that’s him, 100%. Tsubasa’s grandpa, who 100% confirmed turned his grandson into a Noumu. and who is now confirmed to be AFO’s personal doctor. and just happened to be hanging out in Musutafu conducting quirk tests on our protagonist when he was a young child

you guys I’m calling it -- Dad for One just went up to 50% likelihood. we are up to a 1 in 2 chance of this shit being confirmed as fucking canon. we have officially reached the point where these are confirmed to no longer be coincidences, or reaching for something that isn’t actually there. this is now either deliberate misdirection on Horikoshi’s part... or. it’s fucking true

AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

(ETA: that was a four-page quadruple fucking whammy you guys. shock after fucking shock. this chapter is amazing.)

oh my god!?!?!

okay so first of all, is that Hyped Up Noumu there on the far right?? it’s the same head, for sure. doesn’t quite look exactly the same as the final version, though. so maybe just a brother or cousin, or maybe he was incomplete

and we’ve got our first female Noumu as well! League of Villains doesn’t discriminate! nope

two of these Noumus appear to be missing the lower halves of their legs. friendly reminder that these were once normal people -- quite possibly children -- and we don’t know how much they can actually still feel. this is fucking horrifying and I’m not even joking, it’s fairly sickening to think about

I’m trying to see if I can identify any other familiar quirks, but so far it’s a no. I will point out that that one Noumu second from the left appears to have multiple Xenomorph heads. enjoy your nightmares kids

and last, these are all black Noumus, a.k.a. the special super-powerful kind. and there are at least a dozen here that we can see

so once again, just throwing it out there -- we might just be in need of a superpowered OFA kid with SIXQUIRKS once shit hits the fan and the fucking APOCALYPSE breaks loose or whatever the fuck this is all building up to, holy fucking shit

I’m seriously fucking stunned, though. leave it to Horikoshi to have me dropping my jaw to the floor on one page and then making my eyes fucking bug out of their sockets with the next

and so the heroes, as it turns out, did not even come close to unpacking all of AFO’s secrets. didn’t that one cop say way back in like chapter 96 that it was almost like he’d wanted the police to find that warehouse, and that it almost seemed too easy? so now this is evidence that everything -- basically all of Kamino -- was actually all according to AFO’s plan, and he intentionally let that hideout fall into the heroes’ hands. and even more terrifyingly, he most likely intentionally let himself get captured and it’s all part of a long con that he is currently enjoying the shit out of

tl;dr we’re screwed

anyways I think that’s all the freaking out and speculation and weak-attempts-at-analysis I can squeeze out from this two page spread for now. so let’s finish up the rest of the chapter then

so we’re getting confirmation now that Tomura has never been here before

oh my god the shock is finally wearing down and being replaced by HYPPPPPPPPE you guys...!!

so Doctor Eggman here is cackling and confirming that these are indeed not your everyday Noumu

“these children” oh my god

I suddenly feel the urge to go and hug all my U.A. babies. god bless them and please keep them safe! and I feel a particularly urgent need to hug my boy Katsuki especially, because yet again I got to wondering just what would have happened to him if he hadn’t been rescued, if All Might and the Pizza Delivery Team hadn’t come right when they did. and if he’d still refused to join Tomura. and just... shit

and one last friendly reminder that Tsubasa was Katsuki’s friend. the two of them were colossal assholes to Deku together (or well, Katsuki was an asshole and Tsubasa just followed him around smiling, mostly) when they were only four years old. there is a decent chance he’s actually met this man in the context of him being Tsubasa’s grandfather (not that he’d recognize the face given how little attention he pays to these things). and of course, Deku has met him face to face as well -- this is the man that completely altered the course of his life from age 4 through 14

sorry I keep getting so sidetracked guys, but this chapter just portends. y’know? this is some ominous foreshadowing fucking destiny shit. like, this seriously just became one of the most important plot chapters in the entire series. and just, we are finally, finally on to big things once again, and ffffffffffff but I’m so excited I can’t even fucking sit still

sdlfkjsadlkflSLDFHHSDKHFLKHLKJLKJ

THE HANDS. THE FUCKING -- HOLY SHIT

and also! he’s going to duplicate the fucking PERMANENT QUIRK-BE-GONE AHHHHHHH

this just got so much worse. everything. so much fucking worse

honestly starting to feel like six quirks may not actually be enough

anyway, so Compress is squinting and saying that he can’t clearly make out Eggman’s face “what with that backlight”

and. uh

hahaha well fuck. okay then

and Twice is all “jesus christ okay then dude, you’re the one who fucking brought us here to begin with”

and yeah, speaking of. care to explain that?? ever???

all right, so Eggman’s saying that he teleported them there because he doesn’t want to reveal his location

DLSAFHOIHW

so he’s Ujiko??? well shit, there goes the possibility of Ujiko being a lady villain. sorry Toga. still all you, Best Girl

after this I’ll have to go check out Caleb Cook’s twitter to see what he has to say about the name, given that Ujiko claims to have made it up on the spot just now

(ETA: here:

so basically his way of saying he’s AFO’s disciple, I guess.)

anyway, so now he’s saying that the reason he called Tomura here was out of respect for some arrangement that he had with AFO

I’m gonna assume that AFO was procuring quirks for him to aid in his research

oh my god you guys

it just occurred to me that this arc? might be Tomura’s version of getting his own power-ups similar to what Deku’s gotten recently. gotta keep that playing field level after all

lol oh damn

so this is like a Price is Right showcase. all this can be yours, if...

so what are you gonna do now, Tomura. ball’s in your court

and that’s the end of the chapter. oh my god

how many chapters into this arc are we actually?? and already we’ve got the Detnerat shit; Shouto and Katsuki finally getting their licenses (KACCHAN WHEN ARE YOU GOING TO CONFIRM YOUR HERO NAME???); and now these last two incredible League of Villain plot chapters. it’s been like five chapters, and this arc is already like a top three. absolutely incredible

[inkribbon796]

Under the Waves

Summary: Jack and Nate look for clues on how to contain or at least keep their doppelgängers from causing more destruction. Unfortunately it means traversing a near frozen lake in the middle of winter, so they have to call in a favor.

PSA: don’t swim in a frozen lake caves, it’s not safe.

   Sean was working at his computer, sitting in his apartment. It was late and he wanted to sleep in his own bed. He usually spent time in his own apartment. More and more people were starting to call him Jack instead of Jackie, which would have been more common back home, but here in Egoton it was catching on more. He still got both, but the change was refreshing.

   So he was at home, spending time with his cat and his girlfriend when he got a call. It was his person phone though, it was Jackie’s.

   Sean sighed, there went his evening. He picked it up, “H’ello?”

   “Hey, Jackaboy,” the speaker called out. “How’s it going?”

   “Nate?” Sean leaned forward. “Ye still alive?

   “Yeah, yeah, look, I’m coming back to town,” Nate told him. “Tell me, is Natemare still in town?”

   “Course he is,” Sean scoffed. “Causing all kinds ‘a trouble, got away from yah didn’t he?”

   “Well you try controlling a glitch demon bent on absolute destruction,” Nate responded. “Bet Anti’s been a saint.”

   “Shut up,” Sean rolled his eyes. “Call me when you come in, it’d be nice to catch up. I know Mark and the other guys would like to see you again.”

   “Will do, I found something, something that’ll help me contain that freak for longer than an hour,” Nate offered. “Who knows? Might even work on Anti.”

   Sean sat up, “Yer pullin’ my nads.”

   “I don’t know yet,” Nate admitted, sounding hesitant. “But it’s the best lead I’ve gotten in years, and I’m off tour so I’m willing to take it.”

   “Yah got a source fer that?” Sean was already pulling up something to look it up.

   “Well it’s off the beaten path,” Nate answered. “You know that lake in Egoton that hooks up to the river?”

   “Do ye know how cold it is here in Egoton?” Sean growled. “This is one of the worst winters in years, we got three feet of snow out there.”

   “I know, it’s why I want to check before we go, maybe you can ask around to check if there’s even a place like that. I know you’re around some people that specialize in weird stuff like that.”

   Jack rolled his eyes. “Less specialist an’ more magical fanboy. He’ll try just about anything twice, he’s charred his own eyebrows off at least a hundred times by now.”

   “Well, he knows more than the guy I was talking to, I swear he like some a grave digger or something,” Nate admitted. “So I tried to get away from him pretty fast.”

   “Yeah good call,” Sean agreed. “Well, hope you get back to town safely.”

   After their goodbyes, Jack wrapped up what he was doing and then headed over to the base. Quickly heading into Marvin’s smaller library, his books kept away from the Host’s sprawling basement library. This room was used to hold Marvin’s collection of magical books and his collection of journals he used to practice his acts and spellwork.

   Jack saw Silver out of costume, talking to Marvin. He had his arm in a sling, which surprised Jack because of his super strength and quick healing.

   “Well I don’t know what set them off, but it had to be something,” Mark spat in anger.

   “Hey, what happen?” Jack made himself known to the other two heroes in the room. “Ye lose a fight with a brick wall?”

   Mark stared at him before marching over and taking his hands from his pocket.

   “Hey,” Jack spat, Mark dropped the speedster’s phone in a box with Mark and Marvin’s phones. “Gimme back by phone ye douchebag.”

   “Did you say or do anything to Dark or Anti?” Mark demanded, pointing at him with his still good hand.

   “No, why?” Jack asked.

   “Cause they’re both pissed at each other,” Mark spat. “I don’t know what happened but they’ve been tearing into each other. It means that Dark’s network is half as efficient but even Wilford is avoiding Dark. I just wanted to make sure it wasn’t you.”

   “No, I’m clean. Did Dark do that?” Sean pointed at Mark’s arm.

   “Not technically, Anti was trying to throw a piece of pipe at Dark, and Dark used me as a meatshield,” Mark sighed. “Doc had to reset the bone because it was already growing back wrong.”

   “Ouch,” Jack cringed. “So we don’t know what happened?”

   “No,” Marvin dragged his fingers across his face, “but Anti’s been trying ta take me o’er e’ery chance he gets so I’ve been makin’ wards all night.”

   “Really fast before ye sleep, Nate is coming by an’ we wanted to know if yah’ve heard ‘a White Ridge Island?”

   “In the lake?” Mark asked. “The really creepy island in the middle with all the holes?”

   “Yeah, have yah been there?” Jack asked.

   “No,” Mark snorted, as if Jack was crazy. “What part of creepy, cursed island don’t you understand? I don’t believe in ghosts, but there’s all kinds of stuff wrong with the place.

   “I’ve heard ‘a the place,” Marvin admitted. “It’s the one with all the underwater caves, right?”

   “You’re planning on going, and I just wanna say: nope,” Mark already decided. Then he looked down, “I’ve never been so happy to have a broken arm.

   Sean rolled his eyes. “Look, Nate is pretty sure we got a lead ta be able ta stop Natemare an’ Anti from causin’ so much destruction. I want ta find out about it before Anti finds out we’re onta him.”

   “You’re insane,” Mark reminded. “We’re in the middle of the coldest months of the year.”

   “Give me a sec,” Marvin yawned and walked back to a bookshelf to grab a rather ratty looking journal. Careful with this, it’s protected with magic but it can’t take too many hits.”

   “Alright, thanks,” Sean smiled. “I promise not to let this thing get wet.”

   “It’s freezing cold, make sure you’ve got e’erythin’ yah need, an’ take these,” Marvin held up two necklaces with just a large stone with drawing etched into each of them. “It’ll keep the surroundin’ water around ye at room temp two hours after it first makes contact wit’ water, if ye need it. Be quick, don’t be dumb, don’t sleep on the damn island.”

   “Really, yer just going to hand me these?” Sean asked.

   “Only cause yer dumb as bricks an’ I don’t want to go myself,” Marvin dismissed. “In the first page of the journal is the name ‘a the only guy crazy enough to take ye out in this weather. He’s as tall as a tree an’ built like one too, ye’ll know him when yah see him.”

   “I owe yah,” Jack smiled and grabbed his phone from the box. “Hope I bring back good news.”

   “Don’t drown,” Mark warned him.

   “Won’t,” Jackie was already running to get back downstairs, making sure he wasn’t in costume before he left to meet Nate, keeping both the book and necklaces out of the snow. He met Nate at this pub named: The Grey Otter that sat close to the industrial part of the city, but was closer to the large river that led north to Lake Doomstrum.

   Now that he was going to actually head towards the lake, he wanted to know who the hell in Egoton had been responsible for naming stuff. If he had to put money down it was probably Dark.

   The two of them walked in and Jack started looking around when he saw him, the guy must have been ten feet tall, at least. Nate looked over to him before they walked over to him.

   “Hey, buddy,” Sean spoke up. “Are ye Captain Magnum?”

   “Who be asking?” The huge tower of a man asked, turning to them.

   “I heard from a friend that yer crazy enough to help us,” Jack said. “There’s this abandoned island with some buried treasure from the center of the island. Some ancient diagrams on the cave we want. It’ll take two hours top and you won’t have to get into the water.”

   “Arrr,” the Captain smiled down at Nate and Jackie. “What type ‘a treasure are we talking about?”

   Jack took out an old picture of a ferry ship, it was a black and white picture with a large house in the middle of the large island. “Bout 150 years ago there was this old house that buried a lot of their fortune there and never came back for it. The island hasn’t been touched since, not sure why.”

   “Sounds like it be haunted,” Magnum grinned.

   “Nah,” Nate rolled his eyes, “I think the place was Dark’s before he started working out of the warehouses. It’s a shady-as-hell island in the middle of a lake.”

   Magnum shrugged, “Sounds good to me.”

   “So, yah in?” Jack smiled. “Marvin said you could help us.”

   “Ahh, the cat magician,” Cap. Magnum smiled. “Well, he did help me an’ me crew out in Cancun. So long as ye don’t get between me and me treasure, we should gettin’ along swimmin’ly.”

   “Was that a pun?” Jack asked, mentally asking himself when Marvin had the time to flake off to go to Cancun and didn’t tell him.

   “Do we have ourselves a deal, boys?” the Captain smiled.

   “Yeah, we just want some cave drawings, ye can have anythin’ else,” Jackie agreed. “Consider it even fer dragging you out in the snow.”

   “Aye,” Magnum smiled and they shook on it, Jack’s hand just being engulfed by the pirate’s. “Thar be a deal. Ye two got some names?”

   “Just call me Jack,” Sean said. “This is Nate.”

   “Well, if ye boys are up fer it, we’ll take yah on tomorrow, how does that sound?” Magnum boasted.

   Sean looked at Nate. “I’m still in town,” Nate smiled.

   Cap. Magnum laughed and slapped both of them on the back. “Join us boys, let’s get to know yah.”

   Jack looked at the beer stein glasses on the table, knowing that he was going to drop after maybe a couple of those. He tried to back out of it, but Sean and Nate found themselves at the table with them. Sure enough Sean blacked out somewhere in the day and woke up with a terrible hangover. Nate looked pretty bad too, but he woke up before Jack did.

   “Aren’t you Irish?” Nate tried to grin but it came off more as a pained grimace.

   “Haha,” Jack spat, glaring at him. “Imma kick yer ass.”

   After a bit and getting something that would help his raging headache calm down, and some sunglasses, Jack got onto the deck of the ship, both in warm jackets.

   “I see you landlubbers don’t have the stomach fer a good, stiff drink,” Magnum smiled.

   “Yeah, yeah,” Jack groaned. “How long until we reach the island?”

   “Not much longer,” the Captain smiled. “We were delayed by a snowstorm.”

   “Right,” Nate said. “Hey, Jack, you’re sure that those necklaces are going to work?”

   “Yeah,” Jack told him. “I’ve seen Marv use them before.”

   “Kay, ‘cause I’m not freezing to death, not even for this,” Nate reminded.

   “Me neither,” Sean agreed. The island came into view through the winter fog and falling snow.

   “Land ho!” Cap. Magnum called out and they were anchored and tethered to shore.

   Sean and Nate went to go change into gear that would help them cross through the cave.

   “Would be way easier if that American prick didn’t fear the water,” Jackie grumbled.

   “Least we still have cell reception if anything happens,” Nate reminded.

   Jack led them to a cave off to the side of the island. Not too far from the ship. Immediately upon stepping into the cave, both of them realized how warm it was compared to the outside temperature. Which was weird, and unnerving. The water in the half-flooded cave was almost room temperature already, and there was a walkway to the other side, but it looked as if it had gone unused for years and had fallen into almost complete disrepair.

   Nate gave it a suspicious look, hiking the bag closer to him. “Five bucks says a couple feet in it gets freezing.”

   “I bet yah yer right,” Jack agreed and they started to get prepped to navigate through it, moving slowly and marking the exit of the main cave, walking for a bit and marking every time they had to vere into a new tunnel.

   It didn’t take long to reach a second large opening that ended in a small tunnel about weight height. Further down the caveb ut it was pitch black.

   Nate used a flashlight to see that the cave seemed to keep going into the abyssal blackness, it was more than enough to fit both of them through at the same time, but only just.

   “Oh that looks like a murder hole,” Nate stared into the tunnel, trying to angle his flashlight to see deeper down it. A couple rats scurried farther down the tunnel, the two guys only catching the reflection of their eyes.

   But further down the tunnel was something scored into the walls. “I’ll go,” Jack groaned.

   “You sure?” Nate asked, already moving to get out of the water. “Cause I say we don’t.”

   “I’ve got the faster healing,” Jack pulled himself out and into the tunnel. “Just don’t get grabbed by a lake monster. Hand me the camera and the flashlight.”

   “Hurry back, don’t go so far down you can’t see me,” Nate warned him. “I wanna leave as quickly as possible. You want me to hum something?”

   “If it summons your double, no,” Jack already crawling towards the stuff on the wall and fell into another cave that just a second ago he swore didn’t exist. He swore as he fell on his face, almost breaking his nose.

   “Sean?” Nate called out, “where are you?”

   “In here, there’s a whole other cave,” Jack stuck his head back into the tunnel. “It sucks in here.”

   That’s when he looked around at the tunnel, starting to hear a shuffling down the tunnel and turned to see Nate following him. There was something just . . . wrong about this place. Like it was coiling something in his stomach and his feet. Almost like the place should be accompanied by creepy Gregorian orchestra chanting and a monster watching him. But there was just silence.

   Before he could tell Nate to stay back, he was already tumbling into the cave. “Ouch,” he grumbled. “Where are we?”

   Jack shined the flashlight around to see massive reliefs burned into the stone, it showed a figure plunging a knife into its chest with a misty blackness behind it.

   “Uhhh,” Nate responded. “Hope that’s not the spell we need.”

   Jack looked around to see an image of what for a second he thought looked like Dark, the image lacked eyes and a mouth, but it had Dark’s stubble beard and mustache, a crack in the cave wall that split Dark’s face in half. Right next to him was an image with a black mark across its neck, and another with black lines scored down its face.

   “Anti’s not from here,” Sean voiced in surprise. “I’m from Ireland. There’s no way he comes from Egoton.”

   “And I’m from Virginia,” Nate reminded. “I don’t think this is the weirdest thing we’ve come across.”

   Jack walked over to look at the writing under each of the figures, the letters under Dark’s picture was especially faded.

   “How old is Dark?” Nate asked, walking up to the one with the lines running down its eyes to touch the image before pulling his hand away as if it had shocked him.

   “Older than Mark’s folks,” Sean admitted. “Old as the town.”

   “Right,” Nate hummed.

   Jack and Nate began taking pictures of the walls, making sure to get a clear shot of any detail they could find and then left. Quickly leaving the tunnel and following the rope back. The oppressive weight of the room lifting the further they got from it and the images on the wall.

   The two heroes got back to the ship, the snow storm picking up again and they rushed to get back to the part of the ship they’d been sleeping at. Nate already starting to his computer and send them back to Marvin.

   Marvin was quick to get into contact with them, as Magnum was coming back with a couple heavy-looking wooden boxes.

   “What the hell was Anti doin’ there?” Marvin demanded, not even bothering with a hello. His voice crackling over the speaker of Jack’s phone.

   “Yah tell me,” Jack responded. “I couldn’t read any ‘a that stuff.”

   “Okay so, from the big one with our rogues’ gallery on it, it’s not a summoning stone,” Marvin reporter. “I doubt whatever the hell it is, is all sunshine and rainbows, but they didn’t come from that cave.”

   “That’s good right?” Nate asked.

   “Depends,” Marvin admitted and they could hear the rustling of papers. “On who made it, an’ why they made it in the first place. I’m gonna need more time ta decipher this, but it’s gonna take ages cause I don’t speak whate’er the shite this dead scrawl is.”

   “Ask King,” Sean realized, feeling like a complete idiot for not bringing him along in the first place. “He knows like five languages, an’ the Docs always have him translatin’ stuff.”

   Marvin was quiet for a second or two, “Huh, that might work.”

   Nate pulled the phone closer to him, “Hey, Marv, somewhere in there is supposed to be a containment spell. So keep it off the books, okay?”

   “Right,” Marvin agreed. “Gotta get started on this, see yah freaks around.”

   “Good luck, an’ thanks,” Seán told him. “I’ll try and keep Anti off ‘a yah.”

   “I’d appreciate that,” Marvin told him. “I do know something though: whoever dug or found the tunnel was using it like a dowsing rod for demons and other creatures like that, so they could track ‘em. It’s like a records room.”

   “Thanks for your help,” Nate said before Jack could.

   “Sure, I’ll get back to you two when I have something concrete,” Marvin excused, and then the call ended.

   “I’m going to start searching for other leads,” Nate decided immediately, taking his computer back.

   “Good idea,” Jack groaned. “Least I got out ‘a the base.”

   He stood up, “I’m going to go see what that pirate guy’s up to, see you around.”

   “Yeah, thanks,” Nate was always looking at his computer. “Have fun.”

   “Nothin’ else to do right now,” Sean shrugged and walked back up to the deck to talk to Magnum until they made landfall again.

[thesinglesjukebox]

LIZZO - GOOD AS HELL

[7.55]

We look forward to "Juice" hitting the top 40 sometime in 2021..

Katie Gill: It is infinitely amusing that with Lizzo's career trajectory, her songs that are 2-3 years old are getting the radio play instead of her current work. Granted, "Good As Hell" is an absolute banger. But it's an absolute banger that is obviously a product of Lizzo's earlier work, especially when compared the the musical evolution she shows on Cuz I Love You. It's also an absolute banger that seems tailor-made for inclusion in movie trailers or makeover montages but hey, get that bread Lizzo. [7]

Wayne Weizhen Zhang: Lizzo singles don't expire after three years; they're just like chardonnay, get better over time. [8]

Thomas Inskeep: Goddamn, Lizzo can wring every bit of strength out of a female empowerment lyric, can't she? And she nails the rapping/singing combo like no one since -- I dunno, Lauryn Hill? In fact, maybe she's the rightful heir to L-Boogie's throne? And she does it all so damn joyfully to boot. Talk about fresh air on the radio. [8]

Joshua Copperman: After enjoying Big GRRL Small World, I remember hearing that Lizzo signed to Atlantic, working with the insufferably goofy producer Ricky Reed. It felt like a classic "sell-out" moment even if the term has lost all meaning. This song felt destined to blow up, but went nowhere. Neither did "Phone," and neither did "Truth Hurts." Cuz I Love You could incorporate her earlier, more political work in ways that felt authentic... but then "Truth Hurts" got massive, and "Good As Hell" is well on its way. There's a sense that Lizzo will go further in the shouting party anthem direction. She's a great interview, and a fantastic live performer, but it's disappointing to foresee a Bruno Mars-style trajectory when there's so much more to offer. At this rate, Big GRRL Small World could see a rerelease as the darker, more ambitious follow up, but she's still clearly happier making mindless party music. If she saves the thoughtful political commentary for when Terry Gross calls her "brave", that's okay. [6]

Stephen Eisermann: It is so hard to fault Lizzo's older material. While it's very easy to be cynical about self-empowerment anthems today, Lizzo has consistently shown that she excels at putting herself, a plus-size black woman, first and showing other people how to put themselves first. It's hard to separate her past hits from whatever current story she is involved in (like that horrid Postmates debacle), but, fuck, you are full lying if you say you don't smile on even your worst day when you play this chorus. The background vocals, the energy, the personality -- no part doesn't hold up. There is no chorus like a Lizzo chorus, no matter how long it has taken people to notice. [8]

Alfred Soto: Lizzo released a terrific album this year, you know, on which her sense of rhythm and how a star in waiting presents her material meshes wit the body-positivity messages. [6]

Tobi Tella: Sometimes the strength of a song is enough to push past any factors trying to stop it from entering the public conciousness. "Good As Hell" is a little corny, sure, but it's also empowerment without pandering, an uplifting song that doesn't feel the need to insert generic platitudes. Most of all, it's fun, which is something I think 2019 music totally misses most of the time. [8]

Kayla Beardslee: Personally, I'm looking forward to a couple singles from now, when Lizzo's team will be looking so far in the past for singles to push that they'll arrive at a point before her music career began and encounter a time paradox. If "Truth Hurts" can go #1 two years after its release, anything is possible, and why can't that include Lizzo deconstructing our understanding of time as a linear concept? Oh, and I'm supposed to review the song, too. Yeah, "Good As Hell" bops, will bop, has bopped, bops in the subjunctive, etc. The vocals are fantastic, and the piano riff gives the song a constant feeling of forward motion. It's the kind of track that makes you want to sing along, and even if (like me) you fail at imitating Lizzo's attention-grabbing vibrato, "Good As Hell" is so relentlessly fun that you'll feel happy about it anyways. [8]

Kylo Nocom: The power of hindsight is very strange. I used to see talk go around about how "Good as Hell" sounded like it could have been a hit, and now that it is one, is that underdog appeal still here? I used to think that her being compared to Natasha Bedingfield in Pitchfork's review of Cuz I Love You was unfair, but in hindsight, it's not really that far off. Values PSAs had "Where Is the Love?" then, and the soundtrack to them would be "Good as Hell" now. That's not a condemnation: corny stays in fashion, and with sounds as lovely as the ones Lizzo selects (namely, the drum kit of the chorus and the sampled vocal belts) it's easy to ignore how ultimately juvenile the message feels. [8]

Jackie Powell: Right now as we speak, "Good as Hell" sits at number 30 on the Billboard Hot 100. It was featured in the third film in the cult series "Barbershop," which starred fellow women in hip-hop Eve and Nicki Minaj, both whom Lizzo currently eclipses in relevance. Like the film, this track came out three years ago. This sleeper hit, along with Lizzo's career, has emerged from the ashes. They are a collective rising like a phoenix but with slightly more swagger and chock-full of sass. How is all of this possible? Lizzo's entire being defines what it means to be living in 2019. Self-care, inner strength, and an IDGAF attitude. That's why "Good as Hell" hit harder in 2019 rather than three years earlier. Zane Lowe has referred to this track as an "instant vintage vibe" and that's due to clean but predictable production from Ricky Reed. Lizzo's delivery functions in between a bounce in the verses and sweeping call and response in the pre-chorus and the hook. Her magic remains in the way she works to make her raps more digestible for listeners who live on the throwback playlists on Spotify. She's creating a similar product to Mark Ronson in that they both aim to bring sounds from then and now together in a triumphant union. Thank goodness for Lizzo, someone who has the secret recipe to make anyone feel "as good as hell," a task far from effortless. [7]

Vikram Joseph: It seems kind of fitting that I'm writing this before work on a wet Monday morning, because "Good As Hell" is transformative in a way that's hard to resist. Taylor Swift might have recently claimed that she "want[s] your dreary Mondays" (ok, not yours, Joe Alwyn's), but "Good As Hell" simply will not allow them to exist -- at least for 2 minutes and 37 seconds. It achieves this mostly because of the melancholy that lurks in the corners of the song, and because of the way that classic descending chord progression confers a sense of unconditional positivity in the face of chronic adversity. The delivery of "baby, how you feeling?" should win awards -- most singers would sell it as uncomplicated celebration, but Lizzo sounds incredibly empathetic, concerned even, like she half-expects the answer might be "like shit, Lizzo, I feel like shit." And the song's instant meme -- "hair toss, check my nails!" -- is actually a performance piece in putting your best self out there when your heart feels bruised and tired. The strange, wonderful alchemy of "Good As Hell" is that, through method-acting feeling good as hell when all of your instincts tell you that you really don't, it actually makes you feel fucking incredible. [9]

[Read, comment and vote on The Singles Jukebox]

[obtusemedia]

The best songs of the 2010s: #100-76

Happy 2020! Now that the previous decade has finally finished, it’s time to commemorate the 2010s. The decade in which I grew from an awkward teen to an awkward adult. And a decade with a ton of great music. Let’s dive right in: these are my 100 favorite songs of the 2010s.

#100: “Monopoly” by Danny Brown (2011)

Danny Brown is so delightfully grimy. He’s like a cartoon sewer rat come to life, rapping about pills and making hilariously crude jokes. In an anti-drug PSA, he’d be the sketchy weirdo trying to get a kid hooked on bath salts or whatever. And for a quick shot of his non-replicable style, it’s hard to do better than “Monopoly.”

Rapping over a glitchy, menacing beat with his trademark squawk, Brown lands oddball punchline after oddball punchline. In a span of less than 3 minutes, he threatens to defecate on your tape (and he has to clarify that too — “No, literally, shit all on your mixtape”), compares himself to Ferris Bueller sipping wine coolers and then closes his track by describing a woman’s vagina as “smellin’ like cool ranch Doritos.” And that last insult is the perfect distillation of Brown: the Adult Swim of rap. But much smarter than that would imply.

#99: “Shutdown” by Skepta (2015)

At the 2015 BRIT Awards, Kanye West performed “All Day” with a massive crowd of grime artists on stage, all in black, with flamethrowers shooting fire into the sky. 

Four days after the performance, Skepta — one of the artists on stage with Kanye — released “Shutdown.” It’s a much more fitting song for the intimidating, energized and proudly British crowd of MCs than a middling Kanye non-album cut.

“Shutdown” is the kind of song a rapper releases when they’re at the peak of their powers. Skepta was absolutely at that point in 2015, and so his finest single sounds like a coronation. His gruff delivery isn’t too loud, but it’s firm and confident. He knew he was the best MC in Britain, and “Shutdown” cemented that status.

#98: “Amor Fati” by Washed Out (2011)

Washed Out was one of the brightest voices in the turn-of-the-decade chillwave movement, and with cuts like “Amor Fati,” it’s not hard to see why. 

The big single off his debut, “Amor Fati” gives you a similar sensation as taking a shower: Pure bliss and warmth cascade around you. It’s a bit repetitive, but the song is clearly meant to set a mood more than anything else, so that’s excusable. If you need an entry point into chillwave, you can’t do much better than this.

#97: “Los Ageless” by St. Vincent (2017)

St. Vincent’s trajectory this decade took her from an art-pop weirdo who collaborates with David Byrne to a more mainstream art-pop weirdo who collaborates with Taylor Swift. But in that process, Annie Clark was able to pull her sharpest hooks out and put them in use in deceptively dark songs like “Los Ageless.”

With its sleek new wave production from Jack Antonoff, “Los Ageless” could’ve easily fit on most pop records. But Clark’s atonal, shrill guitar bursts and increasingly disturbing lyrics differentiate it. The song’s themes gradually shift from “lol Los Angeles is fake and plastic” to something more tragic. The desperate (in a good way) chorus says it all: “How could anybody have you and lose you/And not lose their minds too?”

#96: “I Like It” by Enrique Iglesias feat. Pitbull (2010)

I’m aware how ridiculous putting “I Like It” — a disposable, trashy club pop hit most people might not remember — on this list. Admitting I that I love this song probably guarantees that I’ll never get a job at Pitchfork.

But then those fuzzy, cheap synths come crashing in. And Enrique Iglesias sings his sleazy come-ons in an auto-tune slurry. And Pitbull delivers a gloriously ridiculous, very-2010 verse that references both the Tiger Woods cheating scandal AND the Obamas (along with gratuitous Spanish and a Miami shoutout). And then there’s the final touch: a prominent sample of Lionel Richie’s cheeseball classic “All Night Long.” It’s too much to resist.

What can I say? “I Like It” hits all the pleasure centers (including nostalgia, seeing as it came out in the middle of my high school tenure) in my brain. It’s a beautifully stupid, hedonistic highlight of the 2009-12 pop golden age.

#95: “The Wire” by HAIM (2013)

Retro-pop standard bearers HAIM had plenty of great singles this decade. But one of their first, the groovy breakup anthem “The Wire,” is still their best.

Unlike many most breakup anthems, which tend to be wildly emotional, “The Wire” is matter-of-fact. The relationship simply isn’t working, and it’s time to end it. That’s that. You’re going to be okay.

The verging-on-curt lyrics mixed with the Haim sisters’ groovy early ‘80s rhythm makes for a pop jam that’s perfect for any “It’s not you, it’s me” moment in your life.

#94: “Helena Beat” by Foster The People (2011)

I know they represent the mainstream selling-out moment of the magical late-’00s MGMT/Passion Pit/Phoenix moment, but I have a soft spot for Foster The People. Their debut album, Torches, might not have much indie cred, but it’s all-killer-no-filler and stuffed with monster hooks. And despite “Pumped Up Kicks” being the big hit, I’ve always preferred the album’s opening track, “Helena Beat.”

With its shuffling disco beat and Mark Foster’s piercing falsetto, “Helena Beat” is likely about as close as alt-rock ever got to the Bee Gees. The lyrics, which tackle addiction, are much darker than “Staying Alive,” but it’s got a similar sense of propulsion.

And let’s not forget — Foster wrote jingles before starting a band, so he can get melodies stuck in your head. And once you’ve heard “Helena Beat,” good luck getting it unstuck.

#93: “Redbone” by Childish Gambino (2016)

“Redbone” might be the smoothest R&B cut on this list. Which is why the song’s sense of dread and paranoia makes it stand out. 

Donald Glover’s scratchy, passionate falsetto isn’t conventionally pretty, but it works well while singing about some unknown boogieman who’s “creeping.” That’s why “Redbone” was a perfect fit for Get Out, because of its lurking dread underneath the comfortable exterior. This is the song that cemented Glover as being a true renaissance man, rather than an actor with a weird musical side project.

(of course, this still isn’t Glover’s greatest musical contribution — that would be the iconic “Troy and Abed in the Morning” jingle. Especially the night variant.)

#92: “Do You” by Spoon (2014)

Spoon has been America’s most consistently great rock band for the past two decade now. Even calling them “consistent” is practically a cliché.

So all you need to know about “Do You” is that it’s another solid Spoon song in a vast catalog of Spoon songs. Lead singer Britt Daniel is still effortlessly cool, the guitar-driven groove is simple and it all goes down easy. By 2014, Spoon had nothing left to prove, except how long they could keep up their streak.

#91: “I’m Not Part of Me” by Cloud Nothings (2014)

Cloud Nothings’ finest moment is four and a half minutes of pure angst and crunchy guitars. Squint hard enough, and “I’m Not Part of Me” is one of the closest approximations to ‘90s alt-rock. And while the Ohio band isn’t necessarily reinventing the wheel here, refining what made past music so great can be just as effective.

#90: “Hello” by Adele (2015)

Despite only releasing two albums this decade, Adele casts a major shadow over the 2010s. Although I find both those records to be a little on the bland side, there’s a reason she was/is a juggernaut. And the example of her prowess is “Hello.”

“Hello” has everything you’d want in an Adele song: It’s about not getting over a breakup, a very relatable topic, and Adele gets to show off her cannon of a voice. But it also has a secret weapon compared to other Adele ballads: ‘80s power-ballad production! The bombastic chorus has more in common with Heart’s “Alone” than any of Adele’s previous hits, and it’s a perfect accompaniment to one of the decade’s most melodramatic singles.

#89: “Slumlord” by Neon Indian (2015)

Despite putting out two essentially perfect albums this decade, Neon Indian’s mastermind, Alan Palomo, doesn’t really have that one mind-melting single. Yes, “Polish Girl” was a decent-sized indie hit, but it’s nowhere near his best.

But “Slumlord” comes damn close to perfection. It’s not quite as heavy on the melted-VCR aesthetic of other songs on Palomo’s best album, Vega INTL. Night School, but it makes up for that with an irrepressible ‘80s techno groove. “Slumlord” is one of those songs that could ride its beat forever — and it kind of does, with the “Slumlord’s Re-lease” coda following it on the album. It’s a nocturnal synthpop jam that even those allergic to keyboards couldn’t resist.

#88: “The Bay” by Metronomy (2011)

While most synth-weilding indie acts were trying to ape MGMT’s high-pitched fever dreams in the early ‘10s, Metronomy decided on a different, sleeker path with their 2011 album The English Riviera. That album’s best single, “The Bay,” is an immaculate blend of silky smooth yacht rock and nervy, tense new wave. Those two opposite styles shouldn’t work together, but Metronomy managed to pull it off regardless, creating the perfect beach anthem for awkward hipster Brits.

#87: “bad guy” by Billie Eilish (2019)

I expect the 17-year-old Eilish will likely be remembered more as an icon of the 2020s than the 2010s, as she has a long and promising career ahead of her. It’s like how Lady Gaga is much more of a figure of this decade, despite her earliest hits arriving in 2009. But “bad guy” — the kind of left-field, innovative pop single that signals a new era — came out in 2019. And it’s too damn weird, catchy and just plain fun to leave off this list.

#86: “Latch” by Disclosure feat. Sam Smith (2012)

It’s a bummer that Sam Smith turned out to be such a bore, because “Latch” — his introduction to the world — is pure electricity. 

Smith and fellow Brits Disclosure, who provide the pulsating, sensual production, were a dream team on “Latch.” All Disclosure needed to do was give Smith plenty of room to unleash his golden pipes, complete with a few futuristic touches. Smith delivered on his end, proving his worth as one of the best vocalists for conveying drama on the dancefloor.

#85: “Need You Now” by Cut Copy (2011)

No, it’s not a cover of the Lady Antebellum hit of the same name. 

There were plenty of ‘80s-inspired epic synthpop bangers this decade; some groups made their entire careers off of them. But what sets Cut Copy’s “Need You Now” above the rest is its sense of patience. It’s an incredibly slow burner, building the tension with a thumping beat and calm vocals until it all explodes with a dazzling climax nearly 5 minutes in. Af that moment, the Aussies fulfill their promise with a euphoric release of synths and thundering drums. 

It’s not a complicated concept for a song, but Cut Copy executed it perfectly.

#84: “The Mother We Share” by CHVRCHES (2013)

Glasgow new wave trio CHVRCHES never really lived up to their promising 2013 debut album, which opened with the anthemic “The Mother We Share.” But man, what a way to start a career.

"The Mother We Share” is all icy synths and furious drum machines, the sounds bouncing off each other like a hall of mirrors. And lead singer Lauren Mayberry’s quiet but confident vocals add the necessary human touch, conveying a tragic feel to the song’s triumphant chorus.

#83: “Night Shift” by Lucy Dacus (2018)

One of the most ferocious, biting breakup songs of the decade, “Night Shift” is a showcase for Lucy Dacus’ vivid storytelling. The Virginia singer-songwriter spends the first half the song setting the scene of a crappy ex trying to halfway make amends, while Dacus’ character holds herself back from lashing out. She saves the visceral emotion for the second half, when the grungy guitars kick in and Dacus lets out a wounded howl, proudly stating that “I’ll never see you again/If I can help it.” “Night Shift” is a tour de force of indie rock songwriting that rewards patience.

#82: “Round and Round” by Ariel Pink (2010)

Much of indie-rock trickster Ariel Pink is a little too jokey and off-putting for my taste. But on his defining single “Round and Round,” he sprinkled in just the right touch of weirdness into a song that otherwise could’ve been a massive easy-listening hit in 1980.

The quirks throughout “Round and Round” — the woozy, off-kilter production, the lyrics that seemingly make no sense, Pink answering his phone in the middle of the song — are enjoyable. But the song’s true strength is in its chorus: a sudden punch of roller-disco AM-lite harmonies that cut through all the song’s oddities. It’s a double-shot of warmth and nostalgic beauty that feels comfortingly familiar, yet still thrilling.

Pink seemed to know the chorus was the key to “Round and Round,” as he makes the listener wait nearly two minutes for it. But its inevitable release is a truly magical moment.

#81: “4th of July, Philadelphia (SANDY)” by Cymbals Eat Guitars (2016)

Heavily referencing an early Bruce Springsteen classic in the title of a song that sounds nothing like Springsteen is quite the flex. But New Jersey indie-rockers Cymbals Eat Guitars pulled it off regardless.

“4th of July” is a clanging, anthemic scuzz-rock track about going through an existential crisis in the middle of Independence Day. While everyone else is making plans for the holiday, lead singer and guitarist Joseph D’Agostino is howling away, “HOW MANY UNIVERSES AM I ALIVE AND DEAD IN?!?” It’s one of the hardest-rocking mental breakdowns put on record this decade.

#80: “I Like It” by Cardi B, Bad Bunny and J Balvin (2018)

Rapping over extremely-obvious samples has been a time-honored tradition in hip-hop, from the Beastie Boys trading verses over The Beatles to Puff Daddy jacking the chorus from one ‘80s hit and the beat from another in the same song.

But Cardi B, and reggaeton superstars Bad Bunny and J Balvin sampling the boogaloo classic “I Like It Like That” was an inspired choice. The trio’s verses are all delicious fun, whether they’re bragging about eating halal in a Lamborghini or referencing a classic Lady Gaga hit.

But that sample, combined with a trap beat and Cardi’s swaggering charisma powering the chorus, is what makes “I Like It” a classic.

#79: “Sign of the Times” by Harry Styles (2017)

Most former boy band members aim for a grown-and-sexy pop anthem once they go solo, whether its Jordan Knight, Justin Timberlake or Zayn Malik. But the standout member of the 2010s’ standout boy band, Harry Styles, chose took a sharp left turn into melodramatic classic rock instead. And it was a brilliant decision.

"Sign of the Times” is about as close to a classic Beatles or Queen power ballad we got this decade, with its clanging Western guitars, lush strings and thundering drum fills. Styles doesn’t have Freddie Mercury’s gravity-defying vocals, but his immense charisma powers the song anyways. It’s not 100% clear what “Sign of the Times” is about, but with its cinematic scope and cryptic lyrics, it’s likely about the apocalypse. And there’s not many superior songs to cry to while the bombs fall.

#78: “Dancing On My Own” by Robyn (2010)

The ultimate crying-on-the-dancefloor anthem, “Dancing On My Own” has already become a standard.

But Swedish alt-pop icon Robyn’s combination of icy synths and heartbroken, jealous lyrics can’t be replicated. Just ask Calum Scott, who slowed down the track into mushy, piano-ballad goop. Yikes.

What makes “Dancing On My Own” brilliant is its resiliency. It’s not a mopey song — Robyn is defiantly still grooving despite her crushed feelings. It’s a siren call for all those who have been hurt and know the only proper way to work out their emotions through cathartic dancing.

#77: “Trap Queen” by Fetty Wap (2015)

“Trap Queen” is an incredibly fun hip-hop banger, but I don’t think I can extoll its virtues quite as well as Fetty Wap’s hype man at the end of the track. So I’ll let him speak:

“YOU HEAR MY BOY SOUNDIN’ LIKE A ZILLION BUCKS ON THE TRACK?! I GOT WHATEVER ON MY BOY!!”

Amen. It’s a real shame Fetty wasn’t able to keep his momentum rolling past a big 2015, but at least we’ll always have the magic dying-walrus energy of “Trap Queen.” HEY WHAT’S UP HELLOOOOO

#75: “R U Mine?” by Arctic Monkeys (2012)

"R U Mine?” offers Arctic Monkeys fans the best of both worlds. On one hand, you have their AM-era slinky swagger. But it also retains the furious rock-n-roll energy of their early days.

Alex Turner sounds like a smooth-talkin’ cowboy here, but the music is anything but smooth. It hits like a semi-truck, with a calvary-charge guitar riff and so many thunderous drum fills you’d think you were listening to the E Street Band.

[carryonmywaywardwriters]

Heathens - Soulless Reader x Demon Dean (Short Series)

A/N: Part two! As always, feedback is incredible. And, I hope you all enjoy <3

PSA: I am NOT a minor friendly blog. If you are below 18, please come back when you’re older. I don’t want to lose my blog because you were too eager to grow up. If I discover you, I WILL block.

Part One

Warnings: Harley/Joker kinda relationship. Unhealthy. Power driven. Smut.

Word Count: Roughly 2,200

“Moose!” His voice was all cheer and glee as he stared up at the towering, still human brother. Trying to ignore the demon-killing knife in the too strong hand. The deep, loathing scowl etched onto the human's face as he stared down the monarch.

Crowley had finally given up. He had no one else to turn to. There were no other beings that stood a chance at getting near the power couple. The two creatures he'd helped shape were raising literal hell on earth. It was time for desperate measures.

“Where is he?” Sam demanded thickly. Booming in rage. Not bothering with any sort of pleasantries. After all, Crowley had his brother for all he knew.

“Ah, yes. Dean-o.” The King's lips pulled back into a scowl. It was time to get to business. Before too much more damage could ensue. “For once, we want the same thing. Squirrel back to himself.” The younger Winchester's eyes narrowed in the low sunlight as he took in Crowley skeptically. “As we both know, your brother is a... changed man. And not for the better.”

“Funny,” Sam snorted. Face twitching as he refrained from colliding into the demon and ending it all. “Last I checked, you were parading him around like some kind of prize. What brought on the change of heart?” Ordinarily, Crowley enjoyed the Winchester sass. But, not then. His eyes rolled instinctively.

“Your brother has this annoying tendency to do as he pleases. I can't control him. I've tried.” The demon shrugged, not even slightly remorseful in his actions. “I might have had better luck if he hadn't run into Y/N-”

“Y/N? Y/N L/N? She's with Dean?” Crowley watched as stark fear crossed the giant's face. “Has he hurt her? God, she has to be terrified-”

“Unlikely.” The king of hell snorted. Too sore from his latest failure to use the hunter's terror for leverage. “The only thing that girl feels is hunger for power.” Bitterness welled inside of him at the thought. You'd not only destroyed his plans for Dean, but the ones he'd had for you as well. In a single swoop. Only needing to bat your eyes to get what you pleased from the knight of hell. Your soul was the only leverage Crowley had against you two, and your only interest was in its destruction. “If I were you? I'd fear more for Dean.”

Realization crossed Sam's face, “You did something to her.” And the anger followed, nostrils flared and all. “I swear to god-”

“No,” Crowley held up his finger as he corrected the hunter. “I only ordered her to be collected as part of a contract that one of my demons created. Simply business. Nothing personal.” The look on Sam's face made it clear. He didn't believe a word the demon was saying. Smart man. “The chit made it damned difficult. Killed my favorite hound. So, I sent demons.” He kept the story simple. Not going into detail about the way you'd fought your life. He didn't need the moose endearing to you anymore than he already was. “They pulled away her soul believing it would stun her enough to destroy her body. But, that's as far as they got.” A vial was pulled out of his jacket, containing the silver blue light that had been torn from your very being. “Turns out your little pet can be quite brutal when she wants to be. And that damned knife you gave her ended up being quite effective. Now? Now we have a soulless maniac on the loose who not only wants to rule the world. But doesn't give a damn who she has to kill to get it. And I'm sure your brother is going to end up on that list if he doesn't follow her orders.” The look on Sam's face said enough. “Don't say it. I know what you're thinking. But, the soulless chit is the problem of the moment. For the both of us!”

“Why not just let it go? Let it find it's way back? If she's not soulless, then-”

“Then, Dean will remove it himself without time counting against him. We'll have nothing to make them pause long enough to gather some control back. They'll be lost.” The King's face fell, just as his reign would if you two continued to skillfully wield your weapons.

You'd already put a large dent into his army. Had weaseled out information- according to the few survivors that crossed your paths- that could give you an advantage. Letting them live only to let Crowley know just how successful you'd been. To toy with his mind.

Harley Quinn and The Joker. Bonnie and Clyde. Or any other powerful duo that could be thought of. None of them compared to the twisted, effective, relationship that you two had. When you weren't covered in blood, you were covered with each other.

“Just when I thought this couldn't get any crazier.” Sam snorted, a bitter half laugh leaving his lips as his hand ran over his stubbled jaw. “Of course it turns into this.” The resignation on his face gave the king some hope.

“Welcome to the party, Moose.”  Crowley smirked, though he felt nothing more than vulnerable. You two were too close. There wasn't much time. He would be dead as soon as you two arrived in town, and he was powerless to stop it on his own.

–

“Harder,” You moaned out in pleasure as his hands bruised into your hips. Your nails digging into the rolling muscles of Dean's shoulder and back as you rode him. Breaking the skin along the way. Not giving a damn that he grunted at the feeling. Your eyes were shut. Head tossed back as you zeroed in on the way he filled you. Yet,  you could feel the warmth of those blackened orbs watching you as you straddled his lap. His grip moving your body along his solid length.

“Alright,” His lips kicked up arrogantly. Instead of just following your orders, you were flipped so that he was on top of you on the wrecked bed. Your empty E/C eyes were darkened with lust when you opened them. The large fists clenched into your thigh and arm hard enough to rebruise the damaged flesh. He slammed his hips faster, giving you exactly what you demanded and then some.

His teeth sank into the soft skin of your throat; drawing both a cry from your lips and pebbles of blood forward that he easily licked away as he thrust sharply. Leaving another mark on your skin with a growl as your claws sank into him deeper. Body clenching hard around his dick. The hot, slick tug of your body trying to hold him hostage. Taking what you needed from him greedily. He left one hand on your hip as he pulled away. Moving to gain more control. The other gripped the wooden frame. Giving him better leverage. The wooden headboard slammed into the wall roughly. Motel room pictures rattled. Other patrons yelled out their complaints. Drown out by the cries leaving your throat.

At one time, sex between you two had been slow and meaningful. There had been lingering kisses, touches, and emotion behind every action. Cuddles afterwards. Conversation about the future. Dissections of your feelings. It had been everything a girl could dream of before it had ended.

But now? You two used each other. It wasn't about getting closer. Simply about getting off. Sex was just another tool in the power struggle you were looked in. Used as a tool for manipulating the other. Abrasive and filthy every time. Primal in nature, much like the both of you.

You both were covered with lesions; branding each other as the other's property. Possessive? Simply because you needed the other to get where you wanted. Thrived off of how much control you could garner with the right look. A simple touch. There was nothing else to it. No love. Not an ounce of fluff to be found. And you two thrived in the mucked up relationship.

“That's it.” His low voice vibrated shock waves through your system as he coaxed you through your orgasm; watching as you fell apart around him. Hips rolling. Mouth open as the delicious sounds poured out of your lips. “Fuck, Y/N...”

Writhing erratically, he tried to get impossibly closer; losing himself inside of the tight hold. Your eyesight focused in time to see his flushed face contort in pleasure. In the past you would have thought he was beautiful. Would have gotten lost in his pleasure. Instead, you focused on the feeling him getting off gave you.

How he stretched you just right when he stopped moving. The warmth of his seed coating your walls. All of it giving you a final bit of a buzz.

“You didn't win,” You huffed, face grim in determination as you came down from one of the only highs you could still reach.

“Your plan is beyond crazy.” He grumbled, rolling off of you. Displeased that the sex hadn't ended the conversation. After all? That had been the point.

“Which is why it would work.” You insisted again, moving to rest yourself over him. The position giving you better access to his gaze. Eyes that were back to the darkened green. That showed the bit of humanity you'd discovered under the surface of 'Deanmon'. “You know he's gunning on Sam wanting to get us back to the emotionally wrecked shithole we were in before.” If you could've felt fear, he'd have said that's what crossed your face. Instead, desperation was a better fit. All wide eyed and tight lipped. “He wants your brother to stop us. He's scared, Dean. All we have to do is get ahold of him- and his bones- and the rest falls into place. Crowley knows that. But, we won't get there before Sam does whatever his part is in the counter plan.” Your fingers trailed through the short, sex mused locks on his head as your voice softened back into that deadly, convincing tone. “So... we have no choice. We have to put you in Sam's grasp. Have to take care of him. Or, everything we've done is for nothing.” He looked unsure, but he nodded grimly. “I know you have a soft spot for him-”

“I don't.” Dean bit out, his demon side taking completely over at the words. Green blackened. Exactly what you needed.

“But, there's a tiny piece of you that does.” Your voice lowered into the manipulative little timbre he'd come to expect when you set your mind to something. His hackles rose. “It's the same part that Crowley wanted to kill. The same part of you that felt the need to keep me alive.” Softly, you added another twist to the knife. “I'm glad that piece of you exists...Really.” Your hand slowly moved down his sweat coated skin, until you reached the warm mark on his forearm. “But, I- we need you to push past it. If my soul comes back? I'll forget all of this. I'll turn against you. We'll lose everything we've gained.” You traced the reddened flesh. Eyes locked wishfully onto the mark. Begging for it, silently. The power it held. “Even if you can rip it back out? We 'll be too far gone. They'll have the upper hand...we can't afford that kinda set back.” Your vacant eyes met his again in a way that made his skin prickle. “You said you didn't want to lose your demon side... I get that. And you won't. Not completely. I have every detail planned out. You just have to trust me, Dean.” Your lips pressed against the anti-possesion symbol that had been etched onto his chest. The similar mark you bore on your hip. As if it meant something to the two of you. Despite both of you knowing better. “Trust us.”

He had little doubt that you'd planned out every possible scenario. Your lack of humanity made it alarmingly easy to spot weakness in anything that had even the slightest bit remaining. To see where they would go. See how to cut past it effectively. Even in himself.

He'd witnessed the skill countless times over the coarse of three months. Against demons, witches, and humans. If anything got in the way of something you desired? You cut it down without blinking. His brother was simply next on the list.

“Fine,” He nodded. You were right. He didn't want to go back to the feeling. To the wretchedness his life had held before he'd gone dark. That much, he was certain on.. “We do this. We've come this far...” Your lips lifted in a sinister grin, making him almost regret agreeing to it right then and there.

Dean/Jensen: @akshi8278​ @screechingartisancashbailiff​

Forever: @dean-winchesters-bacon​​ @supernaturalginger​​ @lilulo-12​​ @awesome-badass-cafeteria-sauce​​ @fanfictionismydeath​

[kpopfanfictrash]

GOT7 Introduction Post

ALRIGHT. You requested, I have written! In honor of the upcoming THOT7 comeback - may our souls be stolen and wallets be emptied.

Member by Member introduction, from oldest to youngest.

Mark Tuan, stage name: Mark. ‘93 line, rapper. Also in charge of acrobatics / fly boy stunts. From LA, USA. Quiet, very intelligent. ISTJ personality. The only one who can pull the hyung card on Jaebum and BOY, WHEN HE DOES. Sometimes pegged as the ‘bad boy’ but lol. Mark’s laugh cures evil and creates butterflies. Deep ass rap, will make you shake in your boots. I know you want me, so stop fronting.

Im Jaebum, stage name: JB. ‘94 line, vocal and leader. Korean. Also writes / releases music under Def (used to be Def Soul, soundcloud here). A tsundere hoe, to quote myself. INFJ personality. Very intelligent, typically takes a more subdued role in the group but DAMN, MEMEBUM. Don’t let the rude exterior fool you, Jaebum is a straight up meme. There are hours of footage on Youtube to prove it. Owns like, a billion cats and they all sleep in his room. OG cat is Nora. 

Jackson Wang, stage name: Jackson. (Chinese name, Wang Jia Er). From Hong Kong, China. ‘94 line, rapper. ENFJ personality. Was a nationally ranked / world class fencer until he was 17. Convinced his parents to let him audition for JYP, moved to Korea and followed his dreams of music. Speaks English, Korean, Mandarin, Cantonese and Shanghainese. Jackson is pure sunshine in addition to being the most extra variety star in existence. Will do a forward flip every chance he can. Is a gigantic mama’s boy. Would never hurt a fly.

Park Jinyoung, stage name: Jinyoung (IF YOU CALL HIM JR OR JUNIOR, HE WILL FITE U). ‘94 line, vocal and dancer. ISFJ personality. Korean. Before debuting as part of GOT7, debuted in a duo with Jaebum called JJ Project. Tied with Jaebum for first place at 2009 JYP auditions. Has melodious, beautiful falsetto. Is an actor, appeared in multiple web dramas and was the young main for Legend of the Blue Sea, in addition to the lead in the independent film, Nunbal. Writes fucking bops. Is basically good at everything, the boy to bring home to your parents. Also the man who may take over the world. Idk. I’m not biased.

Choi Youngjae, stage name: Youngjae. ‘96 line, main vocal. ISFJ personality. Korean. Only trained for 7 months before debut, POWERHOUSE vocal. Composes under the name of Ars. Often compared to an otter bc SMILEY and ADORABLE and just actual sunshine. Anyone who hurts Youngjae answers to Jaebum. Hates cucumbers. Co-owns a puppy named Coco with Mark. Constantly damaging Jackson’s hearing with his yelling.

Bambam, stage name: Bambam. ‘97 line, rapper. ESTJ personality. From Thailand, trained with JYP for three and a half years. Legal Thai name is Kunpimook Bhuwakul but is rarely used except in legal circumstances. Bambam is his name lol. ANYWAYS. Bambam has rapidly switched from adorable maknae line to fly-ass fashion mogul. Loves memes, all things pop culture and fashion. Speaks Thai, Korean and English. Loves to interact with fans, especially through Twitter. Constantly calling fans girlfriends at fanmeets, WILL DAB WHENEVER HE WANTS TO DAB.

Kim Yugyeom, stage name: Yugyeom. ‘97 line, singer and main dancer. INFP personality. Korean. Maknae. Main dancer in GOT7, performed twice on Hit the Stage and won first place the second time. Like Bambam, has transformed from adorable maknae to champion of sexy dance. Yugyeom is coming for us all. Is quiet and sweet but also loves to troll hyung line. Specifically Jinyoung and Jaebum. Is the biggest JJ Project fan in the world. One day, Jinyoung might actually kill him. 

MORE UNDER THE CUT.

So. Eras. 

Their debut single was 2014 with Girls, Girls, Girls. As you can tell, the styling is excellent. Jackson’s small piece of hair popping out of his hat is a personal fave. Thus introduced the boys to the scene though (BONUS POINTS if you spot all the future Twice members LOL)

Next GOT7 released A, which is one of my personal favorites. Yes, that is Sana. LOL ALSO THE DANCE PRACTICES FOR A ARE ADORABLE. This has been a PSA. 

GOT7′s first full album, Identify was released at the end of the year with a lead single Stop, Stop It. Otherwise known as those minions outfits. This song will get stuck in your head. THIS ALBUM IS A BOP, THO. Girl Magnetic and Moonlight are two personal favorites. 

The next summer GOT7 came back with Just Right. Actually, this is GOT7′s most watched MV on YouTube. It was also featured in the Try Guys (Buzzfeed) watch Kpop video. Famous quotes to know about JB: “While this guy doesn’t look like my wife, he makes me feel the way that my wife makes me feel.”  Truth, Ned. 

That fall, GOT7 came back with If You Do, a darker concept. Just... watch every single live stage of this. You won’t regret it. Here’s a favorite, though. In December of that year, the released yet ANOTHER EP, which included the holiday single - Confession Song. EVERYDAY from this album is amazing, thank you JB.

In March of 2016, GOT7 came back with the Flight Log Trilogy (Departure, Turbulence and Arrival). The first album, Departure was released in March. The lead single was Fly, and it was bomb af. That’s just fact. The dance practice for this was also freaking adorable. Fave tracks from this album of mine are Can’t by PARK JINYOUNG. Also Rewind.

That fall, GOT7 came back with Turbulence. The lead single for this was Hard Carry, a heavier beat than previous GOT7 songs. Crazy dance, prompted much concern by fans that Jinyoung died in the MV. Favorite songs of mine here are Prove it, Mayday, No Jam and Who’s That.

The next spring, 2017 GOT7 completed their Flight Log Trilogy with Flight Log: Arrival. The lead single for this was Never Ever. Favorite songs are Paradise, Q.

THEN JJ PROJECT CAME BACK. SUMMER 2017, FIVE YEARS AFTER THEIR FIRST EP. Jinyoung and Jaebum teamed up yet again to put out a beautiful album called Verse 2. If you haven’t listened yet, save yourself. Go listen now. The title track was Tomorrow Today, and it was amazing. Truly. 

Now GOT7 are coming back once more - GET READY FOR FOR 7FOR7

FAVORITE FANCAMS / PERFORMANCES 

My personal fave is this Jinyoung fancam of Can’t. Bless yourself.

Jaebum is also a favorite performer lol bc when JB dances, he dances for JB. This performance of Who’s Your Mama? is excellent, as is this mix. So is this performance of Honey. 

The cover of SHINHWA’s This Love is truly amazing. (JB was hurt at this time and couldn’t perform.)

Never forget baby GOT7 performing I Was Made for Dancing for an audience of middle aged women. LOOK HOW HAPPY THEY ARE. 

Also the time they collaborated with BTS at the MAMAs. 

All the performances of Q (side single to Never Ever) are adorable.

GAH, okay. That should start you off.

Variety. Holy shit. Okay, so GOT7 are kings of variety. Honestly, it’s why I adore them so much. Watch their YouTube shows, it’s GOT7 Canon. 

Real GOT7 season 1 / Real GOT7 season 2 / Real GOT7 season 3 / Real GOT7 season 4

GOT7 Hard Carry, from the fall of 2016 is also excellent. 

GOT7 has a truly awe-inspiring mini-drama series called Dream Knight, available on Netflix. I highly suggest you start with this. And then stare at your screen for several days in confusion. 

JB and Jinyoung have a reality series from their days as JJ Project called JJP Diaries, here.

ALL OF THE WEEKLY IDOL EPISODES ARE HILARIOUS AF. First appearance - 2014.  Second appearance - 2015. Third appearance (multi-group) - 2016. Fourth appearance - 2016.  Fifth appearance - 2017. Er, it’s entirely possible I left some off. Oh, well. You’ll find them. LOL 

Also watch all of their ASC episodes. It’s pure chaos. 

OKAY. THAT’S ENOUGH FOR NOW *falls down on the floor*

... here is a compilation of jinyoung being savage. here is jaebum being a meme for the duration of an entire interview in japan. here is bambam, king of girl group dances. 

OKAY, NOW I AM REALLY DONE.

[thebibliomancer]

Essential Avengers: Avengers #138: Stranger in a Strange Man!

August, 1975

What a weird title.

But the cover is quite good. Or at least quite true to how things go. True-ish. Yes indeed the Stranger is back.

Last time: Fearing an Avengers roster of part-time Thor and Iron Man and also Hawkeye, the Avengers decided on a membership drive. They offered membership to Moondragon for being conveniently nearby and then got Yellowjacket and the Wasp to return. Putting out a PSA and holding tryouts, only Beast showed up. And also the Stranger. The Stranger tried to kill the Avengers with sky sea mines and although all the vintage Avengers blundered into the trap like idiots, newcomers Moondragon and Beast showed sound judgement and skill. When engaged by Moondragon in a PSYCHIC DUEL, the Stranger fled but the Wasp has been badly injured. Because, of course.

We pick up this time with Wasp having been taken to a hospital and Thor (with his Donald Blake diagnostic skills) fearing that she may not last the night.

There’s also a crowd of lookie-loos and reporters around the hospital. Sam Reuther of CBS asks whats the word and Thor only says that the Wasp has been injured by the Stranger and “THE MIGHTY AVENGERS SHALL BRING HIM TO BAY FOR IT!”

Oh. Right. Also. Beast and Moondragon are provisional Avengers. There will be tests and whatnot.

And the lookie-loos being Marvel citizens range from ‘MOM HOLY FUCK THE AVENGERS’ to ‘eew a mutant’ and ‘eew creepy bald woman.’

Marvel’s citizenry are the worst.

Yellowjacket storms out of the hospital and hails a cab (they didn’t bring the Quinjet). Jan is in critical condition and may not last the night. And this time there’s no miracle doctor being held captive by aliens that can save her (which just goes to show that maybe we didn’t need this plot point again). The only reason she’s alive is because tiny physics - she was tiny and got hurled away from the worst of the explosion. Which sure sounds like science.

Anyway. There’s nothing any of them can do here. So Yellowjacket wants to get the Stranger but good.

They return to the mansion to ponder and plan and also wonder where Hawkeye is. He went looking for Black Knight in the past. So no matter how long he spends in the past he should be back already unless something happened.

But worrying about Hawkeye gets interrupted by a sudden psychic attack that knocks the Avengers for a loop and tosses them about in a psychic wind. All except for Thor who has really good balance and really good muscles.

I mention this because its kind of a plot point that Moondragon sees Thor standing up and yelling at the storm and thinks something like ‘hot damn.’ Although later this issue she decides she doesn’t like him because he’s different than Titan’s demi-gods. And because him and Iron Man fight over her like a piece of meat.

Anyway. The psychic attack was the Stranger and for some reason he was trying to pry the location of the Scarlet Witch from the Avengers’ minds.

But he didn’t find anything because the Avengers don’t know anything. Apparently Wanda and Vision just took off on their honeymoon without leaving a contact number or anything.

Yellowjacket realizes that even though they don’t know anything, now they know that the Stranger is looking for Wanda for whatever reason. And they can use that against him. If they set up a decoy and lure him out again...

And if another team stays behind they can use the mansion’s equipment to track his power to the source even if the Stranger doesn’t make a personal appearance! chimes in Thor.

Iron Man volunteers to take point with Moondragon but Thor countermands. Iron Man will stay at the mansion to work the machines. SINCE HIS EXPERTISE IS NEEDED TO OPERATE TONY STARK’S MACHINES CLEARLY. And Thor will go with Moondragon to the decoy.

Oh god. Is Moondragon going to play the role that Mantis was originally supposed to? Causing the Avengers to fight over the pretty lady?

Iron Man protests, asking why Thor gets Moondragon in his group.

Thor: “Because I be Avengers’ chairman... and ‘tis my judgement that she be better suited for this battle than the Beast.”

Anyway. After that bit of pulling rank the groups are Thor and Moondragon on the decoy and Yellowjacket and Beast to stay behind and watch Iron Man run the equipment.

And something that just occurred to me. The Avengers now have Hank Pym and Hank McCoy on the same team. I wonder if they’re ever going to address that might cause confusion.

But speaking of Beast, he reflects that the Avengers play a much grander game than the X-Men did and have been in high gear since he met them, just last issue. He just hopes that there’s room on this team of superstars for a Beast.

Which. Hey. Welcome to one of Hank (McCoy’s) character arcs for the Avengers. He is (or becomes?) one of the bigger geniuses of the Marvel universe but on the Avengers he feels overshadowed by Other Hank or by Tony Stark. He’s strong but he’s not Thor strong. So what’s his role on this team?

Going forward we’ll see what answers he comes up with.

Later, Thor and Moondragon arrive at the Florida Keys in a Quinjet. And the decoy works!

As soon as they set foot on a beach that is a plausible honeymoon destination, the Stranger’s big shouty head shows up to shout at them.

At the mansion, they detect a power beam locked onto that Florida Key and start to triangulate.

On the island, the rest of the Stranger’s body shows up and then another Stranger, challenging Thor to find the real from the replica.

Moondragon finds it curious that the Stranger hasn’t tried another mind-blast. She leaps to attack one Stranger while Thor attacks the other.

A the Stranger grabs Thor, which just brings him in Mjolnir-ing range and it is indeed hammertime. But the hammer passes through the Stranger, confirming him as just a simulacrum. Solid enough to grab a Thor but illusionary enough to fade out when hit by a hammer. As ya do.

So the Stranger Moondragon was fighting is the real thing?

So she smacks his foot to trip him and then kicks him in the mustache (probably the source of his power).

Its a good hit. Even the Stranger compliments her. But she’s still struggling with an enigma. In the stadium, the Stranger’s mind power felt limited. But when he attacked them in the mansion, he was close to omnipotent. But now on the key, he again seems lacking in psychic strength.

What’s the deal, the Stranger?

Thor suggests that she’ll have to force him to tell his secrets and Moondragon agrees, whipping out such psychic strength that it manifests as crackling energy.

Under the onslaught (but not that one), the Stranger vanishes. So both of the Strangers were illusions.

So he was attacking remotely from another location. Yellowjacket was right in his supposition which I didn’t mention. But Yellowjacket is reckless with the Wasp hurt. He shouldn’t go. Something bad will happen.

No, no, says Thor. Clearly he should go.

Thor: “Thou dost not understand, woman! He must go! ‘Tis all the man can do for the one he doth cherish about all else! And he’ll rout that Stranger somehow, mark my words!”

In other words: This Is Something He Has To Do Himself, sigh.

Marvel heroes could gain from learning from Carrot that personal isn’t the same as important.

Just once, when someone is told they’re too close to something or too emotionally involved I want them to take a step back and realize ‘hey you know what, you’re right.’

Thor also asks if the misgivings Moondragon is feeling about Yellowjacket are like the empathic impressions Mantis got. We don’t hear her response because of SCENE CHANGE.

Actually, there was a scene change earlier, right when the Stranger seemingly split into two.

Iron Man triangulated the Stranger signal as coming from the ionosphere, a hundred miles up. And Beast, Yellowjacket and Iron Man ran to take a Quinjet to investigate.

With Iron Man also worrying that Yellowjacket has been running himself ragged since the Wasp got hurt and will burn out if he doesn’t find some release soon.

So then the scene transition.

The Avengers in their Quinjet finds a Stranger craft and tractor beams onto it. One day I’m going to look up when tractor beam was first used as a sci-fi trope.

Hank!Yellowjacket is raring to go and start punching Stranger but Hank!Beast urges caution. Based on his personal experience with the Stranger, they should exercise extreme-- LASERS

GOOD GRIEF

Right when they entered the Stranger’s craft, a laser grid activated about four feet up from the floor, set at a height they’d catch most people right in the heart.

Good thing, Beast was on alert.

The Stranger barges into the room, immune, of course, to his own trap. And since the Avengers are stuck ducking under the LASERS, the Stranger is free to walk up and squish them.

Starting with the Beast.

Beast SPROINGS away. He’s still acrobatic enough to bounce around the room and avoid the lasers. Plus, his mom specifically told him to stay out of bad guys’ clutches. Specifically.

And he bounces around, finally ducking through a door and running like crazy.

Yellowjacket and Iron Man try to crawl toward the door but it shuts behind Beast and the Stranger. Also, how well can Iron Man even crawl in his armor? I bet that, like Metroid, he can’t. But he also can’t turn into a ball. Truly the worst of both worlds.

Anyway, Beast is still fleeing. And still humoring. I like Beast’s humor. Humor is good for a funny books.

But running is all he can do against the Stranger. That and witticisms. Running, witticisms, and his secret weapon. And rounding a corner, he sets up his secret weapon.

When the Stranger follows him around the corner he spots... Edward G. Robinson?!

Of course not, it’s Beast again.

But that does raise a very fascinating question. Beast didn’t have a bag with him. And he’s only wearing his monster modesty briefs. Did he have a full gangster outfit plus rubber mask and hands stuffed into his underwear?

Did he intend to bring the Edward G. Robinson costume or does he simply use it to give himself a conspicuously awesome butt?

And has Beast ever considered theater? Because he pulls that costume out of his underwear and gets dressed up in it in a matter of seconds. That kind of speedy costume change would be the envy of thespians everywhere.

Anyway, the Stranger is so startled to see a dead Golden Age actor on his spacecraft that he suddenly transform into the Toad.

Happens to one in five cosmic beings.

But no. The Stranger was really Toad in disguise the whole time. Or at least in this issue and the previous issue. There is a the Stranger. But he doesn’t care about the Avengers.

Beast reveals that clearly this was his plan and he suspected an outcome like or adjacent to this. Based on similar clues as Moondragon spotted, he thought something was fishy. Clearly the more powerful Stranger that attacked them in the mansion was due to having more direct access to the power source, compared to the ‘in-person’ appearances. Hank didn’t suspect that it was going to specifically be Toad because nobody ever thinks of Toad.

Toad loses his shit at Beast looking down on him. Declaring he’s no longer “just the Toad” or anyone’s minion or dwarfish dolt! He’s his own master! That’s the reason he stole all these machines!

And he runs back to the main hall to find a machine to destroy Hank.

But other Hank spots the Toad, realizes what’s up, and decides to shrink himself so that he can pursue Toad at his own height, under the lasers.

And he chases down Toad and takes out some damn frustration for Wasp’s injury by injuring Toad a lot. He’s a bit short tempered here.

But then an octopus.

No. It’s just another illusion. Beast jumps in and POWs the octopus, knocking down the Toad.

This whole time, Iron Man has been scooting along and finally reaches the off-switch for the LASERS. Good job, Iron Man!

This was really a team effort. High fives all around.

Beast now has Toad in a headlock which of course means its backstory time! Lets tie this all together.

Set off by Beast calling him “Toadie” as in a friendly version of his name and hearing it as “toady” meaning “obsequious sycophant” Toad rants about all the years Magneto mistreated him despite his faith and loyal service.

So he betrayed him. Which we saw in Avengers #53. And then Toad went off with Quicksilver and Scarlet Witch. Because he had loved her afar when they were in the Brotherhood of Evil Mutants together.

Then Toad and Scarlet Witch got kidnapped by Arkon. In Avengers #75-76. Instead of just forgetting that Toad was there, apparently Toad asked to be left behind on Polemachus. Because he had plans.

Using the primitive resources of Polemachus, a planet that thinks anybody smart is a dumb nerd, Toad built a spaceship like he saw Magneto do time and time again, and flew it to the planet of the Stranger.

Despite Polemachus being in a different universe than Earth and the Stranger presumably being from Earth’s universe.

There’s more holes in this story than there is in Swiss cheese.

Anyway. The Stranger wasn’t home, as Toad had been relying on. So Toad ransacked the joint, stealing every bit of machinery he could understand and installing it on the spaceship he built. The thought form device he used to imitate the Stranger was the easiest to understand, after all his years with the Mastermind.

And what was Toad’s ultimate masterplan that he asked to be left behind on a brutal, primitive world to enact?

He was going to master all these devices and then ask Wanda for her hand in marriage.

But then he heard on radio-monitors that she had already gotten married to the Vision.

So he decided he was going to take out his romantic woes on the Avengers and Wanda by killing them disguised as someone they would take seriously.

(And this isn’t even the last time he’ll do this. Toad is Toad-ly the worst.)

At this point, Iron Man has apparently lost interest and Toad yells at him to look at him when he’s talking.

But, hey, Toad. This is the last page of the issue and after two issues of fighting the pretend Stranger, the Avengers have better things to do. Like piloting a Quinjet.

Which makes the Toad literally hopping mad. Hah!

Meanwhile, unseen by the others, Yellowjacket clutches himself in pain and admonishes himself to hold on for the Wasp’s sake. Oh, right. He wasn’t supposed to do any size changing. You done goofed, Hank. No, the other Hank.

Also meanwhile, Vision and Wanda are still enjoying a lovely tropical honeymoon none the wiser of any of these shenanigans. Although Vision looks like a sunburned Mr. Clean.

So!

This feels like another story written to build Beast up. This whole two-parter in general feels like that. It had X-Men villain the Stranger (really X-Men villain the Toad) putting together traps that Beast’s acrobatic skills, disguise expertise, and roomy trousers thwart.

At least part two has the more established Avengers acting less like idiots. This time its mostly Yellowjacket acting like a reckless idiot and Iron Man and Thor briefly fighting over who gets to hang out with the new girl.

And despite Beast basically being MVP in these two issues, he doesn’t feel oversold? Moondragon is the one that fights the Stranger in the first issue. And Yellowjacket lends an assist in this one.

Plus, we get that scene where Beast feels overshadowed by the superstar Avengers.

Now my only question is whether Moondragon will get a similar story to establish her. She has her moments in these two issues. She is the only one besides Beast to start putting the puzzling pieces together. And she has a good show fighting the Stranger in the stadium and on the Florida key and also KOing Yellowjacket.

If so, it won’t be next time. Next time: the Wrath of the Whirlwind. So most likely a story focused on Yellowjacket.

[jy-jk]

NCT 127 in Atlanta

Hopefully I can organize my thoughts into something semi-coherent!

So I guess I’ll just try to do this based on the order of events for the concert. (And hopefully I can remember everything. It went by so fast and I was kinda just living in and enjoying the moment. Unfortunately I feel like that meant I wasn’t trying to commit enough of the experience to memory -- unintentionally of course). 

For reference, I had balcony seats on the right side of the stage when you’re looking @ it. So my experience in terms of member interactions and perceptions will probably be different from people in the pit directly in front of them. 

I’ll start with merch! I had no issues getting what I wanted and it seemed like they had plenty of everything! However, the venue was kinda small so that might have had something to do with it. 

While we were all waiting on the concert to start they would periodically play music videos and it was really nice hearing everyone sing along! They started maybe 10 minutes late at most? But thinking of other concerts I’ve been to before, that’s really nothing. 

They started with Cherry Bomb and it was fantastic! Really the whole concert was fantastic so I’m not going to go through each song and say that because... this would end up getting incredibly repetitive. 

The first person I ended up making eye contact with was Yuta. And let me tell you, that was just the start of some really heart-fluttering interactions. I felt like he was one of the ones to make the biggest effort to look in the balcony areas. Pretty sure we locked eyes the most. At one point he looked up and I ended up with this giant smile on my face as soon as he did and then he smiled this incredibly breath-taking smile. I’ve honestly not stopped thinking about it since. 

I felt like Taeyong was a GIANT flirt the entire time. At one point I saw him looking at the girls next to me for what felt like a full minute and wiggled his eyebrow at them. I’m amazed they didn’t all melt tbh. He also winked at people quite a few times. He made a huge effort to speak english most of the time though and that was pretty cute. Not to mention he’s somehow more gorgeous irl. 

At some point during one of the first few ments, Johnny got us all to do the wave.

Later, they performed Jet Lag, which is going to be on their new album. And it was truly incredible. They were all really excited that we loved it so much because it was something a little different for them. 

After that, vocal line performed Timeless and No Longer. This was also the point that a girl in the pit passed out. The boys looked really concerned while they were trying to get her out to get her some help. I think I ended up seeing one other girl pass out and another one almost pass out. So this is my PSA: please please please take care of yourselves out there. Try to stay as hydrated as possible. Dress comfortably and in something that you won’t get too hot in. At least at this venue, the balcony even got hot. So I can only imagine how bad it was down there. Stay safe everyone! 

Then they left the stage and Johnny came out to do Regular to Irregular. This was the transition into Regular, and they had each member come out individually to put on their suit jackets. And let me just tell you, I never knew seeing a man put on a suit jacket could be so hot but whew. They all looked gorgeous. 

Not sure if any of you had heard about this previously, but after Regular is when they brought out the jungle gym type thing for Wake Up and Baby Don’t Like It. Tbh I was just concerned the whole time that one of them would fall and hurt themselves. But it was still really cool regardless! 

Mad City was next and let me tell you... seeing it performed live was pretty intense. 

They played a VCR next that let into a “dance battle” of sorts with Yuta, Jungwoo, and Haechan that was really interesting! I thought the VCR was genuinely pretty funny and the dance battle was good! (It was also at this point that they changed into their brighter outfits that I thought were interesting to say the least lol). 

During Replay (iirc), they all got light sticks and were waving them with the crowd. They were super high energy at this part and it was a lot of fun! It did really make me wish I had gotten a light stick though. By this time in the concert, I think I had made eye contact with Johnny a few times as well! Nothing specific to note there, but I felt my heart skip a beat every time it happened lol

Then they had another ment and talked about how they were sad the show was “almost over.” Doyoung was always the one closest to my side for their ments and he was just so damn cute. He was the representative for Atlanta and every time he said “My city, Atlanta,” I just felt so proud lol. You could also see him sorta rehearsing/mouthing to himself what he was going to say next while the other members were talking. It was so cute. He spoke really well and it seemed like he really enjoyed his time here! Oh! And a little before this (it was during Replay I’m pretty sure), they had confetti pop out and at one point I caught Doyoung tilting his head up with a giant smile on his face sorta basking in the falling confetti. I’m still kicking myself for not managing to get a picture of it because it felt like such a genuine and sweet moment. 

They performed 2 more songs and after that the show was over. (But of course we all knew about the planned encore). So we all started cheering for them to come back out. And that’s when they played a Highway to Heaven VCR and boy oh boy did they look incredible in that. Not to mention the song was really great, as expected. 

After that, they all came back out in some form or another of sparkly suit and I was LIVING for Jaehyun’s jacket... and just Jaehyun in general. He’s also somehow more gorgeous in person. But to be fair... they all were and I was constantly feeling a little overwhelmed with how good they looked. Oh and I forgot to mention that because of where I was sitting, I could usually see them moving to get on stage. So right before this quite a few of them had their makeup artists following them doing quick touch-ups. 

They performed Superhuman, which was also fantastic. And a little later on, Mark noted that the version they performed that night was different from any other version they’ve done because they’re still always tweaking and improving it before it’s fully released. 

Then they split into 2 groups to go change again, which I thought was kinda funny considering they had literally just changed into their sparkle outfits. The first group were the “youngsters” (Haechan, Mark, Jaehyun, Jungwoo, and Doyoung) and they talked about what they liked about Atlanta. And of course I recorded some of it because I’m a sucker for people hyping up my city. Jaehyun said he really loved the weather. And he wasn’t wrong, the weather the past few days has been incredible. I’m glad they came when they did because if they had come any later in the month it probably would’ve been ridiculously hot. Doyoung talked about the food he and Jungwoo ate when they went on their “date.” It always came back to food for him lol it was so cute. They also mentioned quite a few times that they went to the aquarium. I’m definitely looking forward to the video they got while they were in Atlanta! 

The first group to change came back and they were in tour shirts and black pants. And honestly what a look, I was so into it. This group were the older “cool guys” (Johnny, Yuta, Taeyong, and Taeil). And they ended up doing a little contest to see who looked the coolest. They started with playing rock paper scissors to decide the order. Then each of them had to do a pose and the most/loudest cheers would decide the winner. Taeyong went first and he teased the whole damn audience by making a move to look like he was about to lift his shirt, but didn’t. And then did the cutest pose I’ve ever seen. But at first it was funny because they were all trying to accuse him of cheating because he was wearing his Christian Dior visor backwards w/ the brand clearly showing. Next was Yuta and he did two poses, sexy and then cute. He had on a bucket hat and my god I’ve never liked bucket hats all that much... but Yuta looks gorgeous in one. Tbh I can’t remember who was third and fourth between Johnny and Taeil... but they both also did cute and sexy poses. And let me just note that ATL loved tf out of Johnny. Oh man he was really being hyped up by the crowd. During his poses, the members were making fun of him saying the was his ear was folded up because of his mic was really cool (I don’t think Johnny had realized his ear was all scrunched up before that). It was pretty funny. Then he fixed it and continued with his pose. Anyway, by the end instead of announcing the winner, Taeyong said he thought we were the coolest. Truly the king of fanservice. I think they briefly had a chance to talk about what they liked about Atlanta before the second group to change came back. 

After they were all back, I think that was when Johnny was trying to hype us up again by having us yell ‘yeah’ after they yelled ‘oh’. Johnny had started to elaborate more and then Mark was basically like, ‘yeah dude, they’ll do it... just go’ lol. That was also when Johnny said ‘I don’t know, I just like to experiment’. It was pretty funny. 

Then they performed Summer 127 and this was when they got their baskets with balls in them to throw. I just thought they were plain old balls, whatever. I figured if I caught one that would be cool and I’d keep it as something to remember the concert by. And I did get one! This was probably when I managed to make eye contact with the rest of the members that I hadn’t previously because they all made a conscious effort to throw them to people in balcony seating as well. Anyway, it wasn’t until someone in my group (who had also managed to get a ball) pointed it out that I saw they were signed. Each member’s basket had balls they had signed themselves. I got one from Jungwoo! He signed it and put Zeus underneath. Then under that it says ‘Love you’ with a heart. Truly one of the coolest things to ever be thrown into a crowd at a concert. I’m going to cherish it forever. The person in my group who also got a ball from Jaehyun AND LET ME JUST TELL YOU. I was excited for her (and lowkey jealous of her too) when I saw the interaction surrounding him throwing the ball to her. He threw it and when she caught it he sorta tipped his head back and gave this smug ass look. It was probably the rudest thing I’ve ever seen and he just looked so beautiful doing it. 

They had their final ending ment after that, and I recorded all 10 minutes of that because why not. They all (minus Johnny, Mark, and Jaehyun) spoke Korean and had a translator for the final one. And it was nice to see them speak more comfortably. While I really appreciated all the hard work that went into making an effort to speak mostly in english, you could tell it was a little bit of a strain for some of them. They promised that they would come back to Atlanta! So I’m hoping they stay true to that! Because I have it recorded (and idk how many people will have even read this far) and this is half just for myself to be able to remember the concert better, I won’t go into too much detail about the ending ment. 

And after performing 0 mile and getting a picture with the crowd (with Doyoung wearing his Atlanta sash... so so so cute), that was it! The whole experience was really amazing and I’d go see them in concert again in a heartbeat! 

I thought I’d also have some overall thoughts to share at the end to wrap it up a little nicer, but I basically covered them all already. I’ll probably post some pictures (and maybe another video or two) in separate posts. Oh yeah and this concert also made me realize I’m horrible at getting good action shots lol. Almost none of my pictures of them dancing look good because I caught them at awkward times. 

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 015: Some Antics on a Boat

Previously on BnHA: Field trip from hell. Ride of the Valkyries played while about 200 villains appeared out of nowhere and tried to murder our beloved superpowered children and split them all up, thus setting the stage for lots of mayhem.

Today on BnHA: We meet the U.A. principal. Deku hangs out with Tsuyu and Mineta on a boat. Mineta gets a lot of focus, and I was prepared for it to be the worst thing ever, but it mostly isn’t, except for about once every four pages or so, when it kinda is.

(ETA: Yeah so he officially took it Too Far in chapter 17 and as of that chapter is now in fact dead to me. But I’m not gonna bother changing the recap, so you can all come along on that journey with me if you are so inclined.)

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 19 23 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.)

I really have to hunt down these color pages one of these days. I tried a brief google search the other day but it brought up too many pages I hadn’t seen yet, and I didn’t want to spoil myself by accident. guess I’ll have to be patient

son of a bitch All Might is in the break room all the way back at fucking U.A.??

here I thought there was a break room hidden somewhere in USJ. I mean, you’d think they would have one; rescue training has got to be tiring

he says he should be fine in another ten minutes. then he says he’s going now

but he immediately coughs up blood orz

HEY IT’S THIS PANDA WITH A SCAR!! I KNOW THIS GUY! well I don’t know him but I’ve seen him before!

holy fucking SHIT he’s the fucking principal??

what the fuck kind of I’ll-fuck-your-shit-up powers is he fucking hiding behind that cuddly face then

because I know it’s just an assumption, but surely the principal of U.A. has to be a stone-cold badass, right?

I can’t believe this fucking little gerbil knows Deku’s secret

now he’s fucking plugging the fucking superhero vitamin shoppe I can’t

and he’s holding up a tablet with a yahoo news article about All Might saving everyone and their fucking dog earlier that morning

that’s a nice little plug for you, tumblr. yahoo still owns this shit, right?

so this fucking rat praises All Might for being his good heroic self, but then gently tells him off and reminds him to take it easy

I’m glad he’s reminding All Might to take better care of himself, but...

you would fucking think so! and yet!!

oh my god now this guy is sitting down to have tea with him. he’s never going to make it to USJ at this rate

I have to assume the principal isn’t secretly evil, since if he was, he could take down All Might all too easily since he knows all of his fucking secrets. but he sure does have the worst fucking timing, jesus

though again, we still don’t know how much danger All Might would actually be in if he did go to USJ. those villains seemed pretty damn confident. maybe he should just stay here and enjoy some tea

he calls him “Sensei”... not sure if that’s just because the principal outranks him, or if he actually was his teacher at some point. it’s probably the former, but. hmm

and now we’re back at USJ! Thirteen and Iida are on the run along with Still Too Many Arms and The Bulky Guy with Slightly Racist Lips. (do you guys think they’re racist? idk I just think it’s 2018 and there are other ways to draw POC, Japan)

anyway, they’re fighting Dr. Neck who at this point really needs a new name because he’s still a shadowy blob and now he’s looking more like an octopus but Dr. Octopus is already taken, so

for now I’m just gonna call him Not Today, Satan. you know. cuz of all the Swirling Evil

Thirteen is sending Iida back to U.A. to let them know what’s going on since the communications and alarms are down! good thinking to send the guy with super speed. I just hope he has the stamina. they never really mentioned anything about that but I’ll assume he’s good to run however many miles back to the U.A. campus

that is, assuming he’s fast enough to dodge Not Today, Satan. but I have faith

Iida’s trying to argue that he should stay, but clearly this is the most useful thing he can do at the moment, especially considering that he’s the only one who can do it! just go, Iida.

THIS IS YOUR MOMENT, CLASS REPRESENTATIVE

lmao and I was actually thinking the same as NTS here:

oh, just, everyone. in shounen manga, ever, since the beginning of time. but I’m so fucking happy you pointed that out lmao

back on the boat, Mineta is still freaking out very unhelpfully. he thinks they should all just hide somewhere until the grown-up heroes come to save them

meanwhile, Deku is being smart and useful and brings up a very good point that hadn’t even occurred to me:

basically, he deduces that the bad guys don’t know what the kids’ quirks are. so they have the element of surprise on their side, AND the bonus advantage of the villains underestimating them

I’m super impressed with this kid’s leadership and planning skills right now. I know he’s already showed them off, but I’m still mad about him not utilizing Ochako’s powers properly the last time lol. but this time he seems to be off to a great start

also, what a contrast from his first time facing a group of intimidating “villains” back during the entrance exam! he’s come such a long way so quickly

Tsuyu starts listing all of her gross frog abilities (sorry, I love her, but “I can spit out my stomach” is not something I ever needed or wanted to know and now I kind of want to spit out my eyes from the mental image).

so gross

Mineta becomes derangedly fixated on her usage of the word “secrete” and just. why

I actually kind of wish they weren’t loudly explaining all of their strengths and weaknesses to each other within possible earshot of the baddies (some of whom could possess super-hearing for all they know), especially barely three pages after Not Today, Satan chewed out their friends for doing the same exact fucking thing. but whatever

now Mineta’s doing something. what’s your power then, Mineta. something to do with grapes I’m guessing??

how did this kid make it past the entrance exam

LMAO

THEY’RE SO MAD. EVEN DEKU. THAT’S THE MOST STERN I’VE EVER SEEN HIM. HE LOOKS LIKE LUFFY AFTER SOMEBODY HAS JUST TOLD HIM THERE’S NO FOOD

sob now Mineta is crying

this is quality fucking comedy

oh shit the villains are getting tired of waiting

um this unsettling man with a grasshopper face just fucking broke the boat in half

so Mineta shoots out a bunch of panic grapes for absolutely no reason

literally Lambo and his grenade trigger-response

I confess, I really think Mineta is cute and somewhat hilarious when he’s not being a perverted shithead

(ETA: I was young and naive and I didn’t expect him to actually go and start feeling people up holy shit)

Deku berates him at first but then realizes that the bad guys are avoiding the grapes out of an abundance of caution!

Mineta freaks out again, and I was this close to writing down a paragraph about how I really empathize with him, since he’s just a kid and only like four days into high school, and all of a sudden he’s just thrust into this situation where he might fucking die (and probably die horribly at that). this close. but then he has to ruin it with a line about how much he wishes he could have sexually assaulted Momo before he kicked it

so that’s... great

but Deku saves the moment by quoting All Might while simultaneously doing That Thing I Fucking Love where someone tries to be brave and determined even though they’re also clearly scared. look he is trembling

Deku my son you are a constant delight and a gift to the world

oh my god

sure, just casually mention Kacchan as your inspiration for whatever heroic and probably very stupid thing you’re about to do next. go ahead, do that. don’t worry about me, I’ll be fine

...that is very Kacchan-like. like, the face and everything. he knows his shit

also, what exactly is he planning to do?

so he’s thinking that he can’t take out all of them no matter how extreme he goes. and then he says something about not sacrificing his whole arm, so is he gonna pull another stunt like he did with the baseball and his index finger?

GASP HE’S THINKING ABOUT THE EGG IN THE MICROWAVE

IS HE GONNA DO IT? CLENCH LIGHTLY DEKU!!!! I BELIEVE IN YOU

HE’S PULLING BACK HIS MIDDLE FINGER OH MY GOD IS HE GONNA FLICK THE WATER AND CREATE SOME SORT OF TIDAL WAVE

AHHH

THE WORST FUCKING STATE, LITERALLY MY LEAST FAVORITE!! BUT!! ALSO ONE OF THE SMALLEST SO IT’S FITTING!!!

YESSSS

EVEN BETTER THAN A TIDAL WAVE OMG. DUDE CREATED A FUCKING VORTEX

OH FUCK ME I DIDN’T NEED TO SEE THE AFTERMATH. WE ALREADY GET IT, JESUS

lkshdgk it’s not supposed to do that fuckk

Mineta is inspired, somehow, but doesn’t know how the fuck to direct it so he just throws more grapes

but now the grapes are actually coming in handy!!

looks like team rocket’s blasting off againnnn... *ping*

yay! and Deku’s not crying even though his hand is mangled! such a brave strong boy.

and then shawarma after

BONUS:

interesting that he thinks this is somehow “the right balance”

(ETA: hey Horikoshi, psa, literally committing sexual battery is not “balance” in any way, shape, of form. jesus christ. I love Japan for the most part, but the rampant misogyny there is completely ridiculous and I really need them to get their shit together already. #metoo needs to get the fuck underway there like yesterday.)

one thing I DO like though is that Horikoshi actually gives a very thoughtful and detailed explanation for exactly how he passed the exam! thank you for that! now I can stop wondering. I still have no clue about the invisible girl though lol

[seyaryminamoto]

While I agree that I would've loved to see Zuko and Azula get along more, and I still do want that, but honestly, I don't think that anyone will disagree that Azula's behavior was far worse when she got older. This isn't me ripping on her, because I really do love her, but Ozai corrupted almost any good that she had in her. At that point in time, I agreed with Iroh. She needed to go down. I still have some hope for her redemption, but she was a danger, and needed to be stopped at that time.

PSA: THIS IS A RANT THAT CRITICIZES FANDOM BELOVED CHARACTERS. NOT BECAUSE I’M RANTING ABOUT IT DOES IT MEAN YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO LOVE THEM. THIS IS NOT A BLOG FOR PROMOTION OF NON-PROBLEMATIC CONTENT, NEVER HAS BEEN NEVER WILL BE. I AM NOT PRETENDING MY FAVES ARE BETTER HUMAN BEINGS THAN YOURS. OKAY? OKAY. CARRY ON.

… Actually, I think literally everyone I know disagrees? o_O

I mean, it’s 11-year-old Azula who celebrates Zuko getting burned (for whatever her reasons, it’s very debated, as you might know). 14-year-old Azula doesn’t thrive in Zuko’s pain until her breakdown, which I THINK everyone acknowledges as her not-normal status, where she basically wants revenge for Zuko “stealing” everything she thought was rightfully hers. So, in regards of “basking in suffering”? There’s literally no solid evidence for it when she’s older, which is why everyone uses the Agni Kai as evidence to call her a sadist and then have no other examples for it. Azula has lots of chances to put people through worlds of pain if she feels like it, but she never takes them. Even after taking Zuko captive in the Crossroads of Destiny, she inflicts ZERO damage on him. So? Is she really worse at 14 than she was at 11?

Throughout Book 2 she tries to capture Zuko and Iroh, never kill them. Back when she was 9, she was amused by the idea of Zuko getting adopted by an Earth Kingdom family while at 14 she’s offering him the chance to come home. I’d think there’s a difference, and not quite a negative one. Even if “the redemption she offered was not for him”, it’s still Azula giving Zuko a chance to return to his family and homeland, as fucked-up a family as it may be, instead of thinking it’s hella fun for Zuko to live like a peasant and be cut off from his family and everything he knows. Again, I don’t see how she’s worse at 14.

Though I’ll say, just in case, that if you’re one of those people who think she could see the future and somehow predicted that Aang wouldn’t die because Katara had magic water (for the billionth time, she had no realistic way of knowing this, and this is the only reason why she could have suspected Aang would survive because it’s the only reason why Zuko suspected it in the first place), if you think that she planned everything ahead long before the turtle-duck pond scene, then I don’t think we’ll see eye to eye in many regards, if any at all…

If you’re also thinking about how she burns Iroh in The Chase, as most her actions in Books 2 and 3, she was doing it for a purpose. She needed to escape, Iroh’s the one that got distracted. If anyone else had been distracted instead, she would have gone for them instead, I’m sure of it.

BUT MORE IMPORTANTLY, BECAUSE I JUST KNOW IT WENT FORGOTTEN:

Iroh escaped violently too back in Book 1 from a group of Earth Kingdom soldiers who had rightfully taken him prisoner when he had his guard down. I don’t see the difference between either situation. If Iroh and Zuko get to team up, burn and crush five Earth Kingdom men (who may just have had good reasons to despise Iroh for his siege to Ba Sing Se, just like Iroh and Zuko had good reasons to run away from Azula), why the heck is it such a horrible crime when Azula did it? Is it because she did it to a named, beloved character but when Iroh did it, it was to a random Earth Kingdom soldier?

Just to remind you, since this is an old episode people tend to forget, at one point Iroh even set up a trap so a soldier would “tighten his shackles”, overheated his left shackle and burned the guy’s hand, AND KEPT HIS HAND PRESSED TO THE SHACKLE, BTW, to make sure he got burned! Afterwards, shoots a lot of fire at an ostrich horse so he can cause a distraction and escape, but he fails anyways and that’s when the soldiers decide he’s too dangerous as he is. Now, how is his course of action any different from what Azula did to him and to the Gaang? How aren’t we having discussions on how awful Iroh’s actions are, but this is ALWAYS an argument people bring up to say Azula is awful…?

My opinion? We should start measuring characters with the same scale, same measure tape. If this is something we forgive of Iroh’s, then it makes no sense for it to be something we can’t forgive of Azula’s. All it really means is people are less willing to forgive her than they are to forgive him.

After all this evidence, I don’t think she got any worse with age, nor do I think that at 14 she’s a worse person than a lot of people the Gaang met. I mean, I really don’t know where you’re getting that idea about her being worse when she’s older… I mean, what, she’s better at manipulation? She’s more efficient about the things she does? She’s more goal-oriented? 9yo Azula literally talks about her grandfather and uncle dying as casually as can be, I see no such behavior in 14yo Azula until her breakdown, which is the only point where she starts wanting Zuko dead (given how frustrated Zuko is when Azula doesn’t plummet to death, though, I don’t think she’s the only one who wanted to be an only child).

Long story short, Anon, I see no excuse for Iroh’s comment. Especially when you see him dismissing and treating Azula as less important than Zuko from as early as in picking out presents for his niece and nephew. I see no excuse for Iroh trying to spare his own potentially conflicted feelings when it comes to fighting his own brother, who is WORSE than Azula, while having groomed Zuko perfectly into being ready to fight his sister 24/7. 

She was a hazard and needs to be stopped is an argument I’ve seen used countless times to justify Iroh and Zuko being merciless towards her, btw. May I remind you, though… both Zuko and Iroh end up as her prisoners at different points in time. Then she takes them home, mission accomplished. That’s it. That’s what she did to them at the time. That’s what her threat amounted to. Zuko goes unharmed altogether. Iroh gets treated worse by the creep-ass Warden than he does by Azula. So, she was a hazard? She was a problem? She needed to be stopped? Uh, let me translate that: she was their foil, she was on a mission that they needed to keep her from fulfilling. Just as Azula was a danger to them, Zuko was a danger to Aang in Book 1 (and still part of Book 2). Why doesn’t anyone ever claim he needs to be stopped, that he’s a menace, that he’s a terrible person for all that? It doesn’t happen in-story, ever. When Katara is being super distrustful of him in Book 3, she’s framed as in the wrong about him and takes aaaaaaaaaaall of it back before long. So, why the double standard? Is it because Zuko’s not as effective as his sister? Because his persistence is apparently a good trait, but in Azula it’s the mark of evil?

Really, stop to look at Azula’s POV for a while. Watch the show from where she’s standing. Literally, her every action from Book 2 to 3 (until her breakdown) has a reason, she doesn’t do anything for free. Even her threat to Ty Lee, horrible as it was, came from her deciding to change her tactics and settling on Ty Lee and Mai as her new companions. It proves she’s not going to stop at anything, yes, but she had a purpose. Ty Lee would have stayed happy, unthreatened, in her circus, if only Ozai didn’t tell Azula to find and bring Iroh and Zuko home. It’s because of her mission that Azula drags her out of there. EVERYTHING she does is because of the mission in Book 2. By Book 3, it’s about keeping the Fire Nation on top, and about defeating the threats against it. She literally lets the Gaang get away when she could have chased after them on that blimp she was on at the end of the episode, maybe attacked them from it (especially since Appa was carrying too many people and wouldn’t fly too far like that). She chooses not to, because the battle is over. She won. Why would she need to do anything else? 

Also, literally none of the adults who were taken prisoners look harmed, so the Fire Nation didn’t treat them poorly. Hell, Hakoda is HEALED from his injury when we see him again in the Boiling Rock. Sooooo, how damn horrible it is to lose against Azula, isn’t it? Who has EVER seen a more dangerous villain?!?!?! I mean, ffs, let’s be objective here, shall we? Zhao was way worse to Zuko and to his prisoners than Azula was. Long Feng was a literal brainwasher. By violence measurements and cruelty, she’s a n00b compared to them.

Long story short, if the problem is Azula is too effective a villain without that much violence, and that’s why she has to stop, well, it ain’t her fault her enemies aren’t as competent as she is. I don’t see how she’s morally worse than anyone else they fought, tbh she’s not, because she does offer Zuko kindness plenty of times. Yet she gets treated like the biggest problem ever by the characters and fandom alike.

And really, I think we both got extremely sidetracked from the point of the post that caused you to send this ask. Point is, Iroh doesn’t want Zuko and Azula getting along. Iroh doesn’t ever consider that maybe he can guide Azula into a better path if it was possible with Zuko. Iroh doesn’t ever think that maybe he can help her get out of Ozai’s influence. To him, she’s a lost case, and worse than that, she’s barely family (NEVER does he refer to her as such). To him, she’s the biggest rival he ever faces in the show because, as the show proved, Azula can make Zuko drift away from him. So, Mr. Nice Wise Guy never tried to get along with his niece and basically marked her as unforgivable for as long as she was a threat to his influence on Zuko. Ursa was a nasty mother to Azula and we literally have no proof of her loving Azula, but she didn’t want her children to be enemies. Ozai and Iroh literally turn Azula and Zuko against each other. Can we just accept that Iroh isn’t all that blameless? Why do we need to excuse him and pretend he had every right to behave like this 14yo girl was Vaatu incarnate when the show itself proves she’s NOT?

Seriously though. Iroh is not perfect. What’s so hard about admitting this? Why can’t we accept that he’s not all wisdom? That he never tried to help Azula? That he never wanted Zuko and Azula to get along? That he literally was counting on breaking Zuko away from his other relatives so he’d come to him, and him alone? I’m not saying that Azula and Ozai were good influences on Zuko, because they weren’t, but Zuko used to care about his father. He used to think he should get along with his sister. 

Wouldn’t it be EXTRA meaningful if Zuko had still felt that it was somehow wrong to fight his family, even though he knew it was the only thing he could do, instead of being murder-happy towards Aang while telling him his father HAD TO DIE? Wouldn’t it be better if Iroh had actually tried to reach Azula, but she just swatted him off because she’s not interested in what he’s selling? Wouldn’t it mean something huge for his character if Zuko’s attempt to reconnect with the good in his family had actually meant reconnecting his family to GOODNESS, instead of just worrying about his personal needs during The Search, WHICH IS ALL HE DID???

No. Instead, we get both Zuko and Iroh concluding that their respective siblings need to be ended. If you find nothing worth complaining about in those regards, that’s your problem, but I don’t have to like it. And I don’t have to think they’re heroic or right to think the way they do. Azula is no angel, neither are they. Zuko would be a far more moving character for me if he actually had shown he gave a damn about his sister, but he NEVER DID. 

Because really, every single time you see those asks going around? It’s “Do you guys REALLY think Azula cared about Zuko?” Ask yourself if Big Brother Zuzu cared about Azula instead, for a change. And FYI, if you conclude that he didn’t love her at all, that doesn’t mean you can’t love him. You can. Just, be aware of the fact that he’s no beacon of perfect goodness, that he’s got a lot of areas to improve on, and just like him, Iroh does. I find it beyond unfair that a man who literally redeemed himself at well past 50 years of age decided that his teenage niece is beyond saving. 

So, anon, be objective, don’t look at things from Iroh’s POV but from a neutral one, by understanding everyone’s motivations, and tell me that Iroh wouldn’t look like a way better human being if he just gave a shit about the family members he’s estranged from, while they don’t care about him at all. Literally, it’d be the perfect way to show why Iroh is the morally correct one. You want me to tell you the hard truth as to why this is so hard to accept for most fans? It’s only because of how morally incorrect his behavior is that people keep refusing to admit Iroh was wrong in how he handled Azula and her relationship with Zuko.

[deltaengineering]

summer anime 2017 part 3: welcome to die

Well guess what, I ended up putting posts off for a week.

Again.

So don’t expect a lot of detail here, but do expect a lot of shows.

See also:

• part 1: we can rebuild it

• part 2: bunch of fools

18if

18if is a really weird show about a guy who hangs around people’s dreams and fixes their personal problems - sort of like Persona 4 meets Madoka’s witch mazes. This might have some visual potential if nothing else, and it tries, but what mostly sticks in the mind is that it’s very cheap and also extremely clunkily directed, with a lot of spinning camera tricks that end up looking more desperate than cool. While that does lend it a certain nightmarish weirdness, I doubt it’s entirely intentional and more importantly it makes the show not very entertaining.

Action Heroine Cheer Fruits

So someone made a Love Live clone only with solo tokusatsu performance (?) instead of idols and saving the town instead of saving the school. And the main character is Kotori. Well, silly things happen all the time, but what I didn’t expect is that an anime called Action Heroine Cheer Fruits is actually pretty damn good. Shows of this type aren’t very complicated, but Cheer Fruits nails it where it counts: The characters are likeable, their misadventures are amusing, and the writing is good enough to make me care more about what happens to this town than Sakura Quest managed in half its two-season run. It’s a bit on the cheaper side, but I don’t mind if the fundamentals are this convincing. It also helps that this is written by Naruhisa Arakawa, who previously failed to convince me with active raid but definitely knows a thing or two about tokusatu. Charming and with an appropriately light touch on its silly conceit, this is the surprise of the season.

Ballroom e Youkoso 

It’s a sports shounen! About ballroom dancing...? Well, the manga is fairly well known so the shock factor wasn’t that high here, but I have to say that Ballroom e Youkoso nails the formula, the unusual sport in question makes it less boring than said formula would normally end up being, and it looks pretty amazing. I’m willing to take that chance, if everything goes right this might end up delivering on what Yuri on Ice promised for its first three episodes. Minus the gay of course, but I’m willing to give that up for a show that’s actually consistently entertaining instead. Fingers crossed.

Centaur no Nayami

Yay, it’s another monstergirl manga. This particular one ends up splitting the difference between Monster Musume and Demi-chan, meaning that it only has weird fetish undertones some of the time. Apart from that it ends up mostly boring, because the monster stuff doesn’t really matter, yet the show spends an inordinate amount of time explaining the specific evolutionary circumstances that made this universe possible. Uh, at this point I think I can just accept monstergirls at face value, thanks. The most interesting parts are some hints of this society being not as innocent as it seems, but the other 99% of time it doesn’t seem overly concerned with that: The actual content is just rather boring slice-of-life scenarios of the kind you can get elsewhere easily. I do have to say that opening with girls actually kissing for real is a new one, even if that doesn’t really go anywhere. And that’s really the long and short of it: This seems like a show that doesn’t even really aim to go anywhere, and just isn’t good or interesting enough to make the here and now worthwhile. 

Clione no Akari

This is a 1/3 length short that mostly seems like an anti-bullying PSA. The most tragic girl in the world (sick, orphan, shy, prone to tripping over obvious buckets in the middle of hallways, etc.) gets bullied on top of everything and some other guys feel bad about not helping her. The opening makes it look like everyone will learn a lesson about tomodachiship eventually. I will be nice and say that its heart is in the right place and it’s not actually bad (only extremely hamfisted), but it’s just neither well made nor unusual enough to earn back the time spent watching it; Koe no Katachi has me covered for life on anything this could possibly do.

Dive!!

Do you like ripped dudes glistening in the sun? Sure you do, that’s why you all watched Free! and that’s why we now get another show about pool sports with too many exclamation marks in the name. High diving seems to be a pretty poor choice though, because a single dive takes seconds and this show doesn’t pretend otherwise. The filler around it isn’t very promising either; main dude mostly memorable for being a dick to his girlfriend and admiring his cool senpai instead, no homo. Oh yeah, Yuri on Ice is a thing too, you know. Otherwise you learn more than you’d care to know about the spectacularly uninteresting financial structure of the high diving club, and get to watch the water surface reflecting the sun on to toned abs. Too bad that this particular effect just ends up looking like an unfortunate skin condition. All in all Dive!! is just a poor man’s version of other homoerotic sports anime for fujoshi, and I wasn’t too fond of those to begin with.

Hitorijime My Hero

Speaking of manlove, this one starts out as a fairly engaging character study of a highschooler who hangs out with street thugs because his mother is a prostitute, until the brother of his BFF beats them all up. But then the OP happens and after that it’s pretty much just straight up yaoi tropes because now the dude’s in high school and the cool guy is a teacher, I wonder where this is going. There’s a lot of unfunny komedy and so on. Yeah nah, even a toned down Super Lovers is not what I’m looking for, and laudable opening aside this brings nothing new to the table.

Isekai wa Smartphone to Tomo ni.

I’ve been very mad at smugly ironic genre shows that wallow in the cheapest clichees while “deconstructing” them (i.e., just pointing them out as if that’s an excuse). But the alternative is, of course, just not doing that and playing it all straight without a hint of irony, and it turns out that that is significantly worse. So here’s your 24 minutes of isekai light novel: dude dies, goes to JRPG world and gets to keep his smartphone in complete working condition. Ha ha, I too wish my completely ordinary household item would make me the coolest dude in the universe. But this show goes the extra mile, because while a smartphone might get you some chicks in fantasy land, to get all the chicks you also have to have:

• literal god mode stat boosts

• ability to use all magical elements, an exceedingly rare feat

• access to an even rarer additional magic element on top of that

• the ability to create the irresistible potion “ice cream”

So yeah, this is the isekai power fantasy at its most naked, and apart from making our shitter in chief the most hax guy ever and dropping a huge instaharem on him, he goes beat up trash mobs because that’s what you do. Again, all of this without the slightest hint of self-awareness. Absolute garbage for garbage people from top to bottom, and completely fails to make said garbage fun.

Jikan no Shihaisha

This one at least has the looks down: When it’s an action show, the visuals are really, really cool. Honestly. However, upon further inspection it becomes apparent that this  “Chronos Ruler” here is so poorly written that it cannot be ignored. You guessed it, a lot of exposition and poorly conceived comedy ruin the eyecandy pretty quickly, and it’s all so dumb and dull that I barely remember anything but a vague stink of disappointment. It’s two guys that fight monsters, only not very well? Something about trying to turn back time but that turning out to be a bad idea? It’s all just slush. There's a twist in here that's kind of funny (probably unintentionally) so I won’t spoil it, but it’s by no means worth it.

Konbini Kareshi

Konbini Kareshi is an anime about some highschoolers that have relationship problems and hang out in a konbini, and that’s pretty much it. It’s extraordinarily slow, but somehow I did not end up finding it completely dull - possibly because “nothing happens” also means that nobody talks in this case. A lot of the episode is just awkward, silent situations, with information imparted visually (body language, expressions, etc) instead. Imagine that. Now I don’t want to praise it too much because nothing pays off and, well, nothing happens - but it is actually something markedly different from what you usually see in anime and that’s got to be worth something. I am not sure if I want to give this more chances, but that’s better than being quite sure I never want to see it again, right?

Made in Abyss

If you want to have a master class in how to start a fantasy adventure anime, check out Made in Abyss 01. It just drops you into an utterly beautiful world, sets up a couple of endearing characters and their general situation without boring you with the details, and the explains just enough about the world to answer a few pressing questions that can’t be ignored at the end. It’s beautiful too, great design, great animation, lush backgrounds, the whole shebang. Now it’s essentially a story about a bunch of very young orphans that go spelunking, and the character designs remind me of Ichigo Mashimaro of all things, but I detect no sketchiness here. Obviously it now has a tough act to follow over a whole season, but for the type of show it is you couldn’t ask for a better layup.

Nana Maru San Batsu

Also known as “Fastest Finger First”, this show asks the question: How do you make watching a trivia quiz interesting? Well, the answer is that you don’t. It seems to be a very basic school club show and the topic of the school club is buzzer quizzes. And somehow this fictional story manages to be less engaging than your average actual TV quiz show. Buzzer quizzes don’t have a lot of strategy involved (the show tries to pretend otherwise, but mostly fails), just watching people in quiz-o-vision trying to answer fairly mundane questions is hardly riveting, and besides that it’s just a decidedly subpar comedy. This could have worked if it went full ham like Kakegurui, but it neither has the means nor even much of an inclination to try that. 

Netsuzou TRap - NTR

So here’s the long-dreaded adaptation of the yuri manga that’s so full of bullshit drama that even actual fans of bullshit yuri drama hate it to the point where it became a running joke. And yeah, this sure is bullshit yuri drama about two girls who casually make out while boyfriends aren’t looking too closely. One feels bad about it, the other is a troll. All in all it’s reminiscent of Kuzu no Honkai, except that KnH at least was fully aware that its entire cast was awful people; I can’t even make out what I’m supposed to think about these shenanigans. Now I could say that episode 1 shows potential if it develops properly, but the manga is such a known quantity of bad writing that that’s not a smart idea. It will probably just be Girl A feeling conflicted and Girl B trolling her forever.

Princess Principal

Steampunk is pretty much a laughingstock these days, but I will say that Princess Principal nails the aesthetic if nothing else. It is made of steam and punk; you get your top hats, you get your gears, you get your airships. It’s all pretty cool looking and it also has some nice action. What it’s actually about is some sort of Cold War in divided London, and our protagonists are a crew of schoolgirls that talk about being spies a lot. This is where it becomes apparent that the writer of this was previously convicted of having committed Code Geass (yeah, that guy again), so a certain degree of schlock is to be expected. And really, who else could come up with Steampunk Cold War Berlondon featuring murderous gothlolis? So overall, it’s quite a bit more trashy than I would like but it could be able to pull it off reasonably well on production value alone, and hopefully the writing won’t shit the bed too hard.

Saiyuki Reload Blast

Saiyuki is an old shounen property that adapts Journey to the West. Not to be confused with Dragonball, because this is spaghetti western instead of wuxia. Or so it seems, I’ve never watched one of the anime adaptations that keep getting made every decade or so before. But hey, Reload Blast being a sequel to an anime last made when the ostensible target audience wasn’t even born yet at least has the benefit of not having to deal with tiresome origin stories, we just get to watch the characters do their thing and it’s reasonably easy to figure out anyway. It’s just that it’s not actually all that good; fans of a time when shounen heroes generated a lot of blood spray may get something out of it since it’s pretty violent, but otherwise this iteration of the JttW party are just a bunch of dicks that are trying hard to be cool but aren’t. It’s probably alright for fans of the source material and people hankering for throwback anime, but I don’t think it’s for me.

Shoukoku no Altair

As far as fantasy settings go, a Ottoman-themed one isn’t the most common. So the hero of Shoukoku no Altair hails from fantasy Turkey, which is embroiled in some sort of diplomatic brouhaha with fantasy Germafrance. And that’s really where I start tuning out because this is one of these fantasy epics that start by introducing a million characters that surely will become important eventually, but give me little reason to care about anything otherwise. Exotic locales aside, Altair seems to be mostly setup and the rest of it, the characters, the intrigue, the politics, everything, just don’t motivate me to find out more. It’s possibly not a bad show, but it’s a barely memorable show in a genre I am not particularly fond of.

Tenshi no 3P!

Sometimes it really helps going into random new anime without any previous knowledge. Like here: Tenshi no 3P starts out with a moderately well thought out character sketch of a hikkikomori that spends his day making music and uploading it to the internet. More than a bit tired, but not bad. He then gets a message by “a guy” that wants to work with him. Well, surely nothing bad can come of this. The “guy” turns out to be a primary schooler (girl) from an orphan primary schooler (girl) band that is actually super good but nevertheless needs the services of a music otaku schlub for vague reasons. And then in the end the primary schoolers offer sexual favors in exchange, possibly as a joke but I wouldn't count on that. See, I had been making Ro-Kyu-Bu (i.e., ”Rock-Yu-Bu”) jokes way before that, but as it turns out 3P is by the same author and oh boy can you tell. So it’s this season’s Eromanga-sensei, only somehow worse. I have to admit that I am not even above watching something like this if it’s legitimately great, but thankfully Tenshi no 3P is not even close to being legitimately great. Dodged a bullet there, for sure.

But hey, maybe we will at least get another very embarrassing T-shirt out of it.

Vatican Kiseki Chousakan

And finally, we have a show about some priests from the Vatican that travel the world to examine miracles. Well, one miracle at least, in Guatemala. The concept is somewhat intriguing and could make for a nice horror/detective hybrid with a twist, but I wouldn’t trust anime to pull this off properly, and so it’s no surprise that it doesn’t. For starters we get a pair of very pretty leads that seem primarily intended to bait yaoi doujins, and while it admirably tries for an off-kilter (literally, hope you like dutch angles) horror atmosphere, it is more concerned with out main character’s angst. Yeah I don’t know, the intrigue doesn’t seem particularly intriguing either and the horror just doesn’t quite click - it’s trying for gothick ostentatiousness, but doesn’t quite pull that off. I’d be willing to give this a chance if it was a miracle-of-the-week kind of thing, but considering the amount of characters they introduced for this first case that doesn’t seem to be how this show operates. Or at least I’ll wait until more information becomes available.