#mostly cause i really like crabs

[acornminiatureslog]

FINISHED!!!!!!!!! Another light mech for the mercs, as well as a trio of strikers. If I ever get to play in a battletech campaign, the strikers are a key component of how I'd wanna aim for garrison jobs. Have some mechs for if trouble actually happens, and some cheap light vehicles and infantry to actually walk around and secure a place without breaking the bank. Originally I was looking at some light tanks with autocannons, but then I read what the obsolete special rule actually means and my mercs were not gonna go bankrupt toting around museum pieces

[visualtaehyun]

Pronouns, curses, and cake crimes 🍰

Finally here with the in-depth version of my rambles plain reactions from the other day. Title brought to you by @jeffsatyr cause I love that turn of phrase in his post here so much!

Disclaimer: not a native Thai speaker, still learning 🙏 color-coding characters again: Mut, Rak, Prin, Meena

Rak's lovely relatives

คุณเพิ่งด่าไอ้เด็กเหี้ยนั่นว่า เอาเวลาว่างไปหาอะไรใส่หัว ดีกว่าเสือกเรื่องของคนอื่น ผมไม่อยากเป็นคนเหี้ยครับ /khun pheerng daa ai dek hiia nan waa ao wehlaa waang bpai haa a rai sai hua dee gwaa seuuak reuuang khaawng khohn euun. pom mai yaak bpen khohn hiia khrap/ = You just told off that nasty brat, that [she should] use her free time to find and put something in her head instead of prying into other people's business. I don't want to be someone nasty.

My translation is probably too mild but I wanted to highlight these two aspects: 1) He continues to call her a child (เด็ก /dek/), even though Rak told him last episode that Prin is older than Mut lol and 2) he uses the same curse word twice (เหี้ย /hiia/), once to describe her despicable behavior and then to distance himself from it - and hilariously ends that statement with a polite ครับ /khrap/! -> เหี้ย /hiia/ is used as a curse word but originally refers to a type of lizard

แมงดา /maaeng daa/ = can mean pimp or (male) prostitute or gigolo; lit. a horseshoe crab

It comes from how male horseshoe crabs will cling onto a female's back during mating season, taking advantage of its mate, and is therefore used to disparage men who benefit off of women financially.

Pronouns galore!

Connor and Rak use ฉัน /chan/ and นาย /naai/ in both directions -

Kom uses ผม /pom/ and apparently just คอนเนอร์ /Connor/ -> polite formal 1st pers. pronoun as Kom is younger but he seems to call his older boyfriend just by name which could indicate familiarity, equal standing in their relationship, or maybe it's just because Connor is a foreigner and thus prefers having his name used??

with Rak, Kom uses ผม /pom/ and พี่รัก /phi Rak/ -> polite yet familiar

Mut and Kom use กู /guu/ and มึง /meung/ in both directions, same as Vi and Rak -> rude, familiar pronouns; they're around the same age and have been friends for ages

Mut calls the girls คุณ(ไข่)มุก /khun (Khai)Mook/ and พี่วี /phi Vi/ -> really shows the difference in closeness!

Special interlude

I've seen enough people talk about this inspired subbing choice here to figure it might be interesting to read about:

โคตรพ่อโคตรแม่รู้สึกดีเลย /khoht por khoht mae ruu seuk dee loei/ = It feels fanfuckingtastically good [...]

-> โคตร /khoht/ refers to one's ancestors or lineage but is used as a vulgar intensifier. Adding พ่อ /por/ = father, and แม่ /mae/ = mother, onto that just makes it stronger by swearing on both sides of the family tree I guess lol (A translation in the same vein might then yield you something like 'It feels so motherfucking good' but I love what MMY's translator went with!)

Rak's actually-lovely relative

ตาเค้าเอง /dtaa khao eng/

-> เค้า /khao/ is a cute informal 1st pers. pronoun, her friend Ing-Ing uses it as well For context, it's most often used in Thai QL by 1) characters who wanna be cutesy with their partner, like Sun once or twice in 23.5 or Tan, consistently lol, in We Are, or 2) by characters who are sweet and cute to begin with (mostly women tbh). Anueng in Blank or Pleng and Wan in the upcoming GL Affair also come to mind.

ว่าไง สาวน้อยของน้า /waa ngai, saao noi khaawng naa/

-> น้า /naa/ = uncle or aunt, specifically the mother's younger sibling 'Uncle' only shows up in the subs here but he always uses it as a 1st pers. pronoun with Meena. Also spot the sweet and soft tone he uses here with his niece uwu

แต่น้ารักห้ามเอาน้ารักตอนที่น้ารักอายุ 13 มาเทียบกับมีนาตอนนี้ /dtaae naa Rak haam ao naa Rak dtaawn thee naa Rak aayu 13 maa thiiap gap Meena dtaawn nee/

For her age, she is quite perceptive and clever and it seems her mom and/or uncle (and maybe grandma too?) made sure she understands the full scope of their family drama. Nina, the actress, is a few years younger than that and looks it too tbh so I'm glad she mentions Meena's age for us. She calls herself by name and him uncle Rak น้ารัก /naa Rak/ which, adorably, sounds close to น่ารัก /naa rak/ = cute/lovable, there's a difference in tone though!

พี่จะทำให้เขา ต้องรัก พี่ /phi ja tham hai khao 'dtaawng rak' phi/

-> ต้องรัก /dtaawng rak/ = must/have to love; Tongrak's name He's said this several times in previous episodes but it specifically threw me back to this scene from ep. 3 🥺

คนอย่างผม ใครจะไปกล้าขอคุณต้องรัก /khohn yaang pom, khrai ja bpai glaa khaaw khun dtaawng rak/ = Someone like me, who would dare to ask Khun Tongrak (/you). ...which could also be read as: = Someone like me, who would dare ask you to have to love [me?].

The word she uses is หน้าด้าน /naa daan/ = boldfaced, shameless, which is surprisingly rude lmaooo

The พี่ /phi/ came and went and now she addresses him exactly the same way as her uncle Rak - น้าหมุด /naa Mut/ hehe

Oh and hey, here's a crazy thought-- Mut and Meena have about the same age gap as Mut and Rak, he might even be closer in age to her than to Rak! In the novel, Rak is 30 going on 31 and judging by Kom being 19 in Love Sand, Mut can't be much older than 20, maybe early 20s.

Submission

วันนี้คุณว่าง่ายกว่าปกตินะ /wan nee, khun waa ngaai gwaa bohk-ga-dti na/ = Today you're more docile than usual.

-> ว่าง่าย /waa ngaai/ = docile, obedient, submissive, compliant, to listen If you've seen more than one Thai drama, I expect you've encountered the word ดื้อ /deuu/ before which is most often subbed as 'stubborn' but can mean 'to not listen, disobedient, obstinate, defiant, resistant' so this word here is just about the opposite of it!

อยากทำก็ทำ ผมเป็นของคุณอยู่แล้ว /yaak tham gaaw tham. pom bpen khaawng khun yuu laaeo/ = [If you] want to do it then do it. I'm all yours.

-> อยู่แล้ว /yuu laaeo/ at the end there can express certainty or completion so this could also be translated as 'I'm already yours' if that makes any difference to anyone but me lol

[livesworthlivingau]

Lives Worth Living Chapter 21-23

Spoilers for ISAT/Two Hats below!

"You sure you're good Sif?" (You give a nod and a slight, genuine smile. With plenty of rest and soft food you were mostly feeling back to normal. Your throat was still pretty sore, but Odile let you keep the journal for the time being incase you needed to give more long winded answers.)

"Alright, if you're sure then. How about you Bon? You sure this is the right way?"

"I have never been more sure of anything in my entire life." (They say with a very neutral expression, causing Isa to laugh heavily.)

"Well I can't really argue with that, now can I?"

"This didn't happen last time, did it Siffrin?" (Mira asks you curiously, you just shake your head, looking as confused as everyone else.)

"I wonder what would have caused such a difference? Have there been any significant changes that you think might be to blame?" (Odile asks you, that investigative glint in her eyes. You shake your head at first, but then think some more, your expression dropping some.)

"Well... Loop..." (You mumble with a sadder tone. Odile raising a brow.)

"... It is a star... Maybe they're still out there somewhere, somehow? Helping guide you along one more time?" (You know Odile was just trying to make you feel better, but there may have been some truth to it. Nothing like this had happened before...)

(You feel Isa's hand on your shoulder suddenly, snapping you out of your own head and looking up at him. He smiles brightly down at you, giving a comforting squeeze with his grip. You smile back happily, leaning against him.)

"Nille, here we come!" (Bonbon cheers, leading the charge down the trail towards where they last saw the bright star guiding them.)

------------------------------------------------------

"Why isn't Frin coming?" <You ask, looking around as you notice he didn't leave with everyone.>

"Sif's just tired after the hike yesterday, still kinda recovering, but he's fine! Besides, between you and me I think he liked breakfast so much he went into a little food coma." <Za leans down to tell you that last part, you give a giggle in response.>

"My cooking IS pretty amazing... I guess it's only fair he couldn't handle it all!" <You grin wide, proud of yourself. Za just chuckles and pats your head.>

"Be careful Isabeau, we don't want their head to get too big for their hat." <Dile teases, you just stick your tongue out at her.>

<You all keep walking along to the center of the town, looking at all the fancy ingredients and foods at every stall you pass.>

"Does everyone have their shopping lists and coin?" <Dile asks everyone like the responsible grandma as usual.>

"Yup! Got mine! Camping supply duty!"

"A-And mine! Bonnie and I are food duty!"

"Yeah! I gotta find everything to make Nille's favorite!!" <You cheer, taking Belle's hand and heading off towards more of the food stalls.>

<You look around at what's available, looking for all the ingredients for a shrimp alfredo dish that Nille adored. You only get a little bit to browse before you suddenly hear her.>

"BONNIE!!" <You jump up, recognizing the voice instantly, looking around like mad to find where it came from. You finally spot her, Nille, running towards you with tears in her eyes.>

"NIIIIIILLE!!!" <You practically scream, sprinting towards her and tackling into her, wrapping your arms around her middle, her covering you with her own arms too as she kneels down to your height.>

"Oh Bonnie I've missed you so Crabbing much!!! I'm so glad you're okay!!! I can't believe you helped save the whole dang country!!!" <Your eyes were already pouring with tears, just so happy to finally see her again after so long. Her hug felt the same as it used to, you were so happy to feel it again.>

"I tried so hard Nille! I ran and ran and ran just like you told me to!" <You shout through your tears, sucking at keeping your emotions down even a little.>

"I know you did, I'm so proud of you Bon!" <She shouts back through her own tears. You were both kinda losing it, but it didn't matter, you finally had each other again.>

<After change knows how long of a hug, Nille finally sets you down and stands back up, wiping her tears with a shaky breath.>

"O-Oh! You gotta meet everyone!!" <You shout again, grabbing her hand and dragging her over to the others, they were already together behind you, having been watching.>

"Nille, this is Belle, Za, and Dile!" <Nille goes one at a time, shaking their hands.>

"Thank you all for taking care of Bonnie, and for saving me and the rest of the country of course!" <She cheered, like she was getting a little star struck. I guess we are kinda famous now, hehe.>

"Of course! We couldn't just leave the poor kid alone!"

"Y-Yes! It was our duty to take care of them, but they were a lot of help to have around too! I don't know if we would have made it without their amazing cooking, it really kept us going!"

"They're a real talent, aren't they? I can barely boil water without ruining it, they probably learned out of necessity." <Nille chuckles as you grin proudly.>

"I apologize for the interruption, but did you happen to see a bright star in the sky recently? Perhaps one that led you this direction?" <Dile pokes in, you turn to Nille with bright, wide eyes, wanting to hear the answer too.>

"Oh yeah! That's how we found you!! I saw a star and I just knew it was you!!" <You shout to help explain.>

"Yeah actually! Pretty sure that was my friend's doing, they made a little wish for us to find you and we noticed it a little bit later!" <Dile looks very shocked by that, you tilt your head some too since that was a weird thing to just have happen.>

"A wish? As in... Wish Craft?" <Dile asks after a second.>

"Oh, yeah! Hold on, this'll make more sense if they explain it I think." <Nille turns around, looking through the crowd and spotting someone, waving them over. Someone with a very pretty outfit walks over, darkless hair just like Frin, and... starry lightless skin on their arms?>

"Everyone, this is Vale, we've been travelling together for a little while. They saved me from a sadness that got the jump on me, about a week after y'all unfroze everyone." <The strange person waves a little, smiling really wide. Something about them feels familiar...>

"LOOP?!"

...

"Lead the way!"

<Nille whispers something into their ear before turning back to you. You smile so big, holding her hand tightly. You start to tell her about all your wild adventures as the saviors. Mirabelle coming along and holding your other hand as you all walked together.>

------------------------------------------------------

(You sit at the dining table, working on a little sewing project. You were never the best at it, but you still wanted to surprise Isa with a little gift. Besides, He'd probably cry over any gift you give him, even if it's complete garbage. The thought makes you chuckle to yourself as you work on the little bird plushie for him.)

(You suddenly hear a knock at the door. You perk up at that, wondering who that could be. If it were the others they would just walk in, the door was unlocked, it's Vaugarde after all, people don't do a lot of knocking. You get up from the table and walk to the door, peeking it open, met with the sight of a rather beautiful individual.)

"Uhm... Can I help yo-" (You start to ask, examining this stranger up and down, your words stop and you freeze as you notice the gradient shade of their arms, speckled with stars, looking to their face to see the slightly discolored eyes.)

"L... Loop?..."

[ms-scarletwings]

The Speculative Analysis About Irkens No One Asked For: Part II

Hiya! Back at it again with not shutting up about the lil green dudes. In case you found this first, here’s the Part One of this spiel, touching on some of the environmental theories about Irk and its cyberpunk-leaning cultural direction. While this post is dedicated to a more biological look of what’s going on with the Irkens, there was some leading context and other tidbits back in that one you may also enjoy, too.

So, carrying through what we previously set up, I want to… admit off the bat that, I found it a little difficult at first, you know?-To pick an angle I wanted to sink my teeth into. With how old the show’s become and how creative & enthusiastic a fanbase it attracted, it’s getting hard to really note (or theorize) something about Irken anatomy that hasn’t been said before somewhere. And don’t get me wrong, that’s awesome and I love almost every word of it I’ve read. A lot of it from various sources is almost certainly going to bleed together into the first half of this. So, keep it in mind, yet I will try to chew a little deeper into the questions we can’t actually answer with just a rewatch of the show, all good? Because there’s a few more base things we know from the canon I’m going to include to start listing: - Irkens lack any visible form of nose or ears, but are equipped with a pair of sensory antennae. Presumably, these organs fulfill the same roles, as they do in real-world insects. - Irken organs are obviously very alien, not well explained, artificially enhanced, and hard to compare to that of a human’s- outside of their general body shape, the presence of a primary brain separate from the PAK, and the fact that they do possess something of an internal skeleton. - A petite race on average (relative to humans), Irkens universally follow an unquestioned social hierarchy based on individual height. - Irkens are endowed with a remarkable ability to regenerate and heal superficial injuries, even up to repairing the damage of being nearly skinned alive (chest-down) or severely burning their corneas within a matter of hours. - Their preferred diet is one that is rich in (if not primarily made of) refined carbohydrates, and while they seem to tolerate fatty sources, such as processed dairy, their anatomy is poorly suited for dealing with high-protein foods like beans and meat. - In fact, all forms of contact with exposed animal meat itself will cause it to dissolve and meld into their own flesh, via an incredibly painful process. - On contact with water from Earth, their skin will receive harsh chemical burns (This has been explained by Vasquez to be a consequence of impurities and man-made pollutants, which Irkens seem sensitive to). - While I’m already on a roll about their skin, it also contains/produces a substance capable of killing lice.

Now, I think we’ve all heard a lot about sqeedily spooches, but does anyone else want to keep marinating a second longer on the topic of s k i n ? Because I have some damn thoughts to release about Zim’s outer casing.

Let’s Get Chemical

First hot take, and the hill I am willing to be slain on: That ain’t actually skin! At least, it is nothing chemically alike to Earth-native vertebrate skin. I’ve given all of the above and the general running theme about Irkens resembling arthropods a lot of thought, and I’ve come to about the only conclusion I could that makes their dermis equivalent… make sense.

See, one of the biggest traits that sets apart invertebrates from other animals in real life is the “innie or outie” skeleton question, but you gotta understand that the “skeletons” that bugs and crabs have would still be considered something completely different from our endoskeletons even if they were on the inside. The hard tissues that make up OUR skeletal systems are mostly made up of a *collagen (remember that word!) frame that is reinforced by calcium, phosphorus, and other minerals. The hard parts of an ant’s skeleton, on the other foot, are mainly composited of chitin.

Chitin, now, is a very neat substance. It’s a polysaccharide, meaning that it’s made up of a bunch of sugar molecules chained together. This makes it distinct from proteins, which are made of amino acid chains instead of carbs. Chitin is also one of the single most important structural polymers in the universe to a ton of existing life. It makes up the literal backbone of arthropods and the cell walls of all fungi. We’ve even found it in fish scales and some amphibians. So, must also be important to humans, right? NAH. Not a chance. Higher animals actually long ditched the ability to synthesize the stuff, and are not any the worse for it, since there’s more than one way to stick a bunch of creature pieces together. For two examples, keratin and *collagen are proteins we naturally synthesize that functionally do the same thing. Keratin is the hard substance that makes up hair & fingernails, and collagen is practically the wonderglue of flesh: It’s a fundamental binder that holds together your bones, your skin, your precious muscle meats, the ligaments, the tendies, the nerves…

pretty much the whole person blueprint if you get the picture.

And thus concludes your (VERY overly simplified) highshcool bio class recap, but what the hell did that have to do with the cartoon spacemen again? I’m gonna round back to them through a funny secret about exoskeletons, actually: They have a softer part, too! Chitin’s hella diverse in its forms and utility. What’s in an exoskeleton is actually a version of it modified with other materials (like what’s done to collagen in bone) to make it so rigid and shell-like. A purer chitin, on the other hand, is more leathery and flexible, less like the shell of a beetle and more like the squishy wall around a caterpillar or maggot. Even the hard bodied insects still have an endocuticle layer like this hiding just under the “shell”, still considered part of the whole exoskeleton, but suddenly looking and acting more like we’d call a skin.

Eh, see where I’m going with this? My conviction is this- Irkens may have used to be even more arthropodal in an earlier stage of their evolution, including BOTH an internal skeleton, and some form of protective exoskeleton in their body plan. And hey, maybe the two were extensions of the same system once, too. You recognize something like that in modern tortoises when you remember that their “shells” are actually just the bone structure of their own ribcage. Then, let’s say that Irkens later saw the loss of their heavier exocuticle, leaving behind the endoskeleton and the flexible inner (now just an outer) cuticle of what used to be an entire body shell. This could have been a gradual change, via natural selection, or it could have been another artificial mutation brought on by technology- wherein the elder brains decided the feature was less efficient and simply phased it out of the cloning process- the same as the loss of their species’ sexual organs.

But, you’re thinking, why on Irk would the loss of an entire badass armor layer be beneficial to their fitness? Few reasons- For one, they are cumbersome and limiting. The downgrade on freedom of movement and flexibility they would be for a bipedal humanoid is self-explanatory enough. When it came to structural integrity, the inner skeleton would have already done a well job with little modification. For all the protection they provide, they don’t leave much room for expansion, and need to be shed in order for the animal to grow any further or to recover from certain injuries. The process of molting itself would be an excruciating process for any intelligent species to have to endure; one that also temporarily leaves the critter in a very vulnerable and stressed state for every molt. To advance from more primitive origins into a dominant race, manual dexterity and mobility would have to take a front seat over a small amount of modest defenses, and mind you, Irk long ago woulda managed to compensate for that loss in the form of advanced weaponry (obviously).

I’m also of the mind that the shift away from an exoskeleton could have even been the key to allowing the Irkens to even grow to the size they are now. Recall back to Part One for a second, where I shared the likely case for Irk having a massive bulk behind its gravity field. Gravity is a hard thing on any skeletal structure, representing a constant strain to be fought against when moving, growing, and bearing weight .There’s a lot of factors behind why we don’t have horse sized spiders or elephant sized lobsters IRL, and weight is actually one of them. Notice how terrestrial isopods only get about to the size of a bean, but the aquatic ones can top out at over a foot long? And that’s only having Earth’s level of gravity to struggle against, let alone however harsh the conditions would be on a larger planet. So, there’s my framework for explaining what I think the aliens’ cuticle is not; however, what does that mean for what it is, besides “feels and looks like a grub’s”?

Well, look again at some of the extraordinary things it can do.

Cooties Immunity

“Germs” was a memorable episode that posed a very legitimate question to the viewer. Why IS IT that foreign pathogens aren’t a bigger concern for the invaders? They’re literally sent off to other worlds to blend in: Socializing with the native inhabitants, eating their foods, and living in an alien habitat. In the case of an undiscovered rock like Earth, our infectious diseases would have no reference available to the Armada whatsoever. Sure, species incompatibility would provide some protection, but the risk of something carrying over and adapting is always still there. Zoonoptic jumps happen all the time with bacteria and viruses, and Zim’s body temperature IS in the normal human range. And what about fungal pathogens, or parasites-

Oh, wait, the lice episode gave it away right there.

I love this sequence so much, because it’s coincidentally like, an exact “art imitates life” parallel to something a real species of primate does. Black lemurs live in the same area of Madagascar as these vibrant, red millipedes.

The millipedes are special because when threatened, they secrete a poisonous substance from their skin. The lemurs are special because they like to grab the bugs and nibble them for no other reason than to make them release those toxins. Those chemicals are then rubbed into their fur, because somehow the lemurs figured out it makes a really handy mosquito repellant. The lemurs also like to get completely zonked out on the chemicals too but eyy- Point was it stands to reason that Irkens may also secrete small amounts of their own potent toxin from the cuticle, perhaps for more hygienic than defensive purposes. This secretion would be responsible for protecting them from parasites and topical infections. Could it also make people blazed out of their minds? …Maybe? I think I’d like to promote the “Just Say No” policy on the matter of licking aliens, though. Ffs at least ask them out to dinner first.

When it comes to other kinds of sick, looks like it might be the trusty old PAK to the rescue here again. I imagine that, being an intergalactic, partially mechanical civilization, the Irken race has come down this road enough to put in a workaround. A standard PAK contains the entirety of the population’s collective knowledge/history- which would include a catalog of all known infectious agents they have encountered across the universe. Some kind of nanobot-bolstered immune system that could detect and respond appropriately to new threats isn’t out of the question, nor should a feature that can automatically administer the appropriate medicine directly into the wearer’s bloodstream. For all this awesomeness, nonetheless, there remains a downside or two that they haven’t quite conquered..

The Meaty, Sweety, Mending of DOOM

Anyone ever actually think about how as far as resilience is concerned, Zim is practically an X-man compared to any Earthling? He has regenerative capabilities that surpass anything else on earth, save idk, bamboo shoots, if even. Injuries that would leave a human permanently disabled only seem to incapacitate an Irken for a few hours to a day at most. They’re all the more tough to put out of commission when considering that a PAK doubles as a form of backup life support, ready to “soft reboot” the host with a quick jolt if it detects a sudden drop in vital signs. It is tempting to credit the same device as the source of this healing boost as well, teasing the nanobot suggestion again; however, I see a chance instead to bring this back a step.

Although not as quick-acting as Zim, or Skoodge’s healing, there are some remarkable examples of regeneration in real arthropods, from repairing tissues/organs to replacing entire lost limbs. What the aliens are packing doesn’t seem all that different, only refined (through years of bioengineering) to work at a truly frightening efficiency. It shows through in their diet as well. Almost always, if we see a member of this species eating on screen, and believe me there was no shortage of examples, what are we watching them shovel their face with?

Space doughnuts, space popcorn, space Fun-Dip, sodas, and curly fries. Sure, there’s plenty of calories here, no doubt with the amount of carbs and grease that could even turn the stomach of a college freshman, but is this… nutrition?

Yes. Just not for us.

Like their civilization, we have also turned the mass production of sweet-packed, fat loaded foods into one of our favored art forms, and there are scattered pockets of our planet that can enjoy these items in cheap abundance. The catch 22? Obesity and heart disease. Meanwhile, Irkens are so metabolically blessed that they can follow the same lifestyle and actually be thriving by it. We know that the majority of human food is utterly toxic to Zim, but then there were waffles, a literal stack of dessert and butter that pretends to be a breakfast…. Our guy was experiencing the “finally some good fucking food” meme from the first bite off that plate, but this can’t seriously be healthy,or if it is, then how?

Well, if I did sell you on the idea that much of their tissues and skeleton swaps out a chitin base where we would be using protein, there you go. Sugars for the building blocks to synthesize the connective/structural tissues for maintaining the body, and the bulk of the energy required to keep it running. And I won’t make the leap and suggest that’s all they have.

After all, the Irken equivalent of sandwiches do actually seem to contain “lettuce” and something that people will say looks like meat slices while not convincing me. I can get behind the thought of the natural or maybe original Irken diet to be a mix of plant matter and supplemental fungi, but everything I’ve put together implies that they are completely unfit for processing the goodies in animal flesh.

Overwhelmingly, I believe that the only time they possibly even seek out more sources of amino acids is going to be when they are smeets. That’s how it works in many wasp species. I.e. The growing larvae are the only ones that actually get to reap from the hard work of a colony hunting down enough protein to feed them with, yet the adults live out the rest of their lives more than content to gorge themselves on nectars and fruits exclusively!

And you even could put that aside, but you’ll have to grapple with the ungodly thing that happens every single time you see Zim touching a piece of meat. Would be awfully convenient to blame it on his personal brand of weirdness, or earth contaminants, but we remember this was a weakness that Tak approached fully aware of and expecting.

We know that polluted water can burn them. We know that beans and other foods can give them grotesque allergic reactions. Well what in the horrifying name of Resident Evil is this, though? Buddy pals, I think we got some unintended consequences of that bio-hacking on hand. Collagen and chitin aren’t just functionally similar to each other, they are practically analogous building blocks.

For a WILD science fact, consider that there’s a ton of ongoing research into the application of chitin and chitin-derivatives into having a role in tissue engineering, as a hypothetical scaffold in lab cultured meat, and as an effective wound dressing ingredient.

What we’re seeing with incidents like Dib throwing that Bologna at Zim could be an extreme form of the vise versa, because I know a certain protein that processed meat happens to be pretty high in :)))

Imagine the coupling of this with the bioengineered genome of Zim’s kind being so… reactive to a foreign intrusion, yet also flexible to modification. Maybe it is the acids, or some contaminant/seasoning on the meat that first damages the cuticle. That healing ability kicks in, but doesn’t stop where chitin does, readily binding to and with the collagens in these strange tissues that are sorta like an Irken’s but also just enough not like an Irken’s that it also kicks the immune system into overdrive. Think of all the pain and inflammation of a poison ivy rash but if the damn plant itself could also fuse itself with whatever you brushed against it. I think Zim actually had an understandable reason to be homicidally pissed off for that Bologna assault. Also how the Bologna virus was accelerated in Zim’s body. Once it had incorporated itself into his own DNA, it was game set and match with the speed and help those cells had to replicate themselves.

And uh, yeah, I think this post has gotten about as long as it reasonably should be here. I did have a couple more points I really wanted to get out of my brain about the Almighty Tallest, and I think that would be a good launching point actually for a possible (and hopefully final jfc) part three to this. Till then I got some off-topic scoliids to taxidermy 👀

[ideasarestuckinmyhead]

A silly thought I had 👀

What about Rook begging Auron to go on a zoo or aquarium date and after like a week of asking he reluctantly agrees

BUT THEN they go and it goes great until they do one of those things where you hold an animal (or for an aquarium; a touch tank) and he freaks out internally cause he doesn’t know what to do and then what happens next to is up to you 😋

Aquarium date!

"Please can we go to the Aquarium??" Begging with puppy dog eyes Rook was leaning on Auron's bed. Both were enjoying time together when Rook got a date idea, but Auron was a bit iffy on it. He had some bad memories there, like a hermit crab crawled on his had when younger and he cried. His mom took almost half an hour to calm him down, so yeah he kinda didn't want to go there. Auron didn't know how to tell them this because it was really, really embarrassing, but they never really chose where the date is so he agreed to make them happy.

"I don't see why not. Let's do it Friday, is that okay with you?" The red head already knew it was okay with them, he knew their schedule and everything they do in a week. Rook smiled wide and leaned over to kiss Auron all over his face while saying "Thank you!" Over and over again.

Now fast forward top Friday, Auron was wearing something causal for this date. But Rook always said he doesn't have causal in his vocabulary and his definition is very different compared to others. But hopefully he wasn't over dressed, his thinking was cut short by Rook tapping his shoulder. He turned to greet his partner, he was picking them up from their apartment and gave them a chaste kiss.

"Are you ready, dear?" Getting confirmation from his lover he gave the chauffeur the signal to drive. It was 11 am so they can be the first few people to get there so they don't get interrupted by children. On the way there the couple were talking about their day, mostly Rook since they had things to do in the morning starting at 6 am.

"And the lady just glared at me like I caused her to slip! I was trying to warn her that there was a paper on the floor." Huffing Rook looked out the window for a moment to ease themselves. "Oh! We're here! This is going to be so fun!" Excitingly chirping as they turned to look at Auron. Their smile made him smile, yeah maybe ding this won't be so bad for him. As long as their happy with this date that's all that matters to him.

"I hope so, there's lots of sea creatures to look at here. It was newly opened last month." Of course when Rook asked to go to this specific aquarium he looked into it to see if it was good or just claimed to be so. He was pleased to find that it was, there is many exhibits you can go to here. There was even some penguins here, it was a good idea to put the aquarium almost in he center of the city, lots of foot traffic.

Getting the tickets were easy, walking into the aquarium was interesting to do. There seemed to be some schools here for a trip for the children, shrugging that off Auron looked at Rook as they skimmed the map they got form one of the workers where to go to.

"hhmm, where should we go? Auron is there anything that catches your interest?" Questioning as they kept their eyes on the map. Auron looked and saw a shark tank, turtles, penguins, coral reef and even the touch tank.

"How about the penguins?" Rook nodded and wrapped their arm around Auron's. Both smiling from the simple contact and walked to the exhibit they agreed on. Seeing penguins in person was really interesting, watching them dive in to the water, doing small tricks for fish and Rook even got to feed one. They clapped excitedly when the small penguin 'Rock' took it, it even let them pet it a bit!

"Auron oh my god that was so cool! And Rock was so cute I'm going to cry." Gushing about the penguins Auron smiled as they walked to the next exhibit, the shark tank. "Wow that's a big shark." Rook looked in awe at the Coral Cat shark the aquarium had.

They both watched the shark a bit before Rook "Wanna go somewhere else? I think there's a touch tank somewhere?" Hesitantly saying as Rook looked back at the map to confirm yes, there was one. Auron froze a bit and was thinking about his memory before seeing Rook look up to him waiting for an answer.

"Anything you want, dear." Rook gave him a suspicious look but decided not to pry. Both walked in arms Rook pointed at the many tanks they passed going to the touch tank. They ended up hearing a lot of laughter as people touched random animals that were okay to feel.

"Oh I always wanted to touch a hermit crab! Oh I hope they have some bamboo sharks. They are so cute!" Auron nodded as he looked slightly uncomfortable to be there, but got his shit together when Rook came up to the side of a touch tank and marveled at the animals in it. Slowly they let their hands in and lightly pet a hermit crab, "This is so weird!" Giggling as they continued Auron slowly came next to them.

"Hey Auron, are...you okay?" Rook decided to bite the bullet and ask their partner. Auron went to open his mouth to slightly lie but Rook gave him a look that said 'tell me the truth, please.' and he sighed.

"I don;t have the fondest memories of it. Where I was like 6 I cried bc a hermit crab touched me." Looking away in slight shame but Rook asked for him to look at them.

"It's okay if you don't wanna be here, this is a date for both of us. If your not comfortable I'm not. Lets go to a different part of the aquarium then." Taking out the map Rook was trying to find something that Auron would like. Seeing Rook do this made him fall a bit more in love with them, and because of that he decided something.

"I think I want to touch one, animal from here." Saying as he turned back to the touch tank, Rook paused and looked at him.

"Are you sure?" Getting a look in return they giggled and nodded, "Okay then, what do you wanna touch?" Auron looked and saw a hermit crab, seeing how small it was he was sure it would do anything if he touched it lightly. And so he did, it felt a little weird kinda reminding him of that memory when younger but, he didn't freak out. Was just a bit discomforted, the little creature simply stood there not doing a lot and Auron took his hand away.

"Okay now I see how silly it was to be scared of this hermit crab I guess." The red head said then turn to Rook, "Wanna go some where else now?" Rook nodded then pointed to one part of the Aquarium map. Seeing where it was Auron smiled, "Sure Rook let's go see the jelly fish." Locking arms once again, the couple enjoyed the rest of their date.

[techs-ass]

Shark Sundays: Epaulette Shark

Hello, hello! Welcome to my Shark Sundays post where every week I let people pick a shark that I then just kind of info dump about on Sundays. This week's shark winner is the Epaulette shark!

Now, please remain seated for the whole ride and try not to throw popcorn at the narrator, they're very sensitive.

Conservation Status: Least Concerned

This adorable little sea pup is the Epaulette shark or Hemiscyllium ocellatum! Their base body color is a creamy or slightly brownish hue and marked with widely spaced dark brown spots. The Epaulette shark gets its name from the very large, white-margined black spot behind each pectoral fin, which kinda looks like decorative military epaulettes. These little guys are one of the smaller species of sharks growing at a maximum of 27 to 35 inches long (70-90 cm) and living for around 20 to 25 years. They can be found in shallow tropical water at around the depth of 131 ft. (40 m) in the western Pacific Ocean usually near New Guinea and Australia.

The Epaulette shark feeds at low tide and is most active during dusk and dawn. They hunt for food by pushing their snout into the sand and shuffling around, once the prey is located they will thrash their body around to catch it. The way they chew their food is actually kinda cute as they'll chew it with little bits sticking out of their mouth. Speaking of prey and eating, these guys eat things that are somehow tinier than they are, mostly feeding on crustaceans, small fish, and polychaete worms. The adults will usually eat shrimp and crabs while the juveniles will mostly eat worms and fish. Though both of them use suction feeding!

Now because these little cuties are usually found in warm, shallow waters they regularly interact with humans. If you happen to see one in the water, don't panic! The most these guys might do is nip at your toes if you wiggle 'em too much but otherwise, they're completely harmless and have no recorded attacks on humans.

Fun Fact: Some Epaulettes are actually kept as pets. They thrive pretty well in smaller environments and are relatively docile besides the occasional little bite to their caretakers.

Now that we've gotten past the basics now I can tell you about the most fascinating thing about Epaulettes. Are you ready? Cause you gotta be ready for this fact. It's a really cool fact. Are you sitting down? Not drinking anything? Ok, ok here it is:

Epaulette sharks can walk on dry land for up to 98 ft. (30 m) and survive hypoxia - a deficiency of oxygen- for two. whole. hours.

Yeah, you read that correctly. The Epaulette SHARK can walk!!! on land!!! Look at this gif and tell me it's not the coolest shit you've ever seen.

Look at him go!! AHH!! *shakes you aggressively* WE ARE LITERALLY WATCHING A MARINE ANIMAL GO THROUGH THE EVOLUTION OF LEARNING TO WALK ON LAND!!! IT COULD POSSIBLY EVOLVE TO BE A FULL LAND ANIMAL WITHIN 30 TO 40 YEARS!!!!

*ahem* Now you may be asking, "But Mal, why are they walking on land?" Well, there are multiple answers to this question. The main one is that they do this to get from tide pool to tide pool allowing them to access new pools to forage for food, or tidepools with better-oxygenated water. They also use this little talent to evade predators! As y'know, other sharks and large fish can't walk on land like this absolute Chad. Scientists believe that with the effects of climate change, this ability will help them to survive drastic changes to their environments.

Speaking of survival, let's talk about the Epaulette's conservation status. Thankfully for these little guys, the IUCN Red List has them as a species under "least concern" This means that there's nothing that really poses any major risk to their species and they're relatively abundant. They do, of course, have natural predators but because it has no value as a commercial food fish and is not considered a sport fish, the Epaulette isn't really targeted by humans except for the aquarium trade. So if you're favorite shark is the Epaulette then you've got pretty much nothing to worry about as the Epaulette's are happy and thriving!

This doesn't mean that humans pose no threat to the Epaulette. Our actions still have a huge impact on their lives! From overfishing to reef destruction, and how toxic the exotic trade can be, we still have to be careful. It's important that we recognize our actions have consequences and not just on us. It's our job to spread awareness and hold each other accountable (especially big corporations who cause most of the damage.)

Aaaand this concludes this week, Shark Sundays! I do hope you enjoyed reading about this cute shark and I hope you learned something new! Thank you so much for stopping by <3 If you want to be put on the tag list for Shark Sundays (including the polls to vote for which shark you want to read about next!) then just let me know in the comments or reblogs!

Tgalist:

[freakinator]

I've been wondering for a long time. How would you characterise Wemmbu? How he seems in your eyes, your opinion of the guy. I hope I don't sound weird or crazy.

aw dw anon its okay to be curious ^^

regarding my characterization of wemmbu, while there is a lot of consistency in how he acts since hes an improv rper and therefore generally just acts as a polished/exaggerated version of his own self, there are still a few differences in how he acts depending on what smp hes in

general: smarmy, quite pathetic but tries his best to hide it until he literally cant anymore, opportunistic, petty, truthful in that kind of way that makes you doubt him, not quite black and white thinking but can switch up fast when someone does something that presses his buttons (doesnt necessarily trigger when someones just being mean, its specific kinds of things -- mostly has something to do with pride and trust), has a desire to be on top of things but whether or not he indulges in that desire depends on his overall plans and the kind of server hes in, silly but in a lowkey way as in like he presents himself as a normal person which works but only if you dont look closer, lowkey cringey in that uwu kinda way (affectionate), good at one-on-one yapping esp if hes confident & knows more about the situation than the other person but starts to crumble if its either him vs a group or if hes genuinely not confident about something, willing to sacrifice so much just to achieve his goals whatever they may be

kings smp: more opportunistic and a lot more willing to lie & manipulate & betray, crab mentality very high but he holds it back since indulgin in all of it at once isnt very good for his plans

challenge smps: like kings smp but even More willing to lie & manipulate & betray, has a stronger crab mentality since the whole point of the smp is to win and he really wants to win and he knows he wont be seeing these ppl in this context again anyway so hes willing to do whatever it takes even if it means betraying his allies, << does Not apply to team challenges btw he will be very loyal until hes given a reason to betray such as believing the others are betraying them first

lifesteal smp: had a good grasp of what it means to be a lifestealer right from the get go but has struggled a bit in figuring out what that means for him exactly so he still has a bit of that new guy stench if you get what i mean (this characterization becomes less and less prominent the later in the timeline it is), has been very loyal thus far and is more than happy to point that out, average level of lifestealer aggressiveness, i like to parallel him with zam mirror-style due to them having opposite thought processes but coming to similar conclusions (pic below of unfinished draft ive had for ages cause idk how to word my thoughts regarding this properly other than 'the vibes')

unstableverse: very obvious mirror parallel to zam that i honestly wouldnt be surprised if it was on purpose, kinda hard talking about his motivations and character devoid of context regarding zam considering he spent 4 out of 5 eps as a major character (even when he isnt actually there lmao) and wemmbu spent 3 of those 4 eps obsessing over him but i will try my best, can be a bit of a stalker but only if he really cares about whatever it is the guy hes stalking is doing/potentially doing, no empathy (affectionate), generally doesnt care that much about individual players but when he gets attached he gets Attached for better or worse, zeroes in on his goals even to his own and others' detriment, a lot more pathetic than in other smps or at least has a harder time hiding his patheticness, also may just be me but i think hes more pessimistic?? not entirely sure tho

overall i think hes pretty neat! pretty cute and silly but also devious and mischievous, if i could shake him in a can i would

[basilpaste]

"Fighter." They say, stiff as anything.

You smile at them cordially. You've done this song and dance before. It's familiar in a way you should probably be uncomfortable with. You think you were, at one point.

"Loop!" You say back.

It's the name they've given themself. You won't push. Maybe eventually you will, but not yet. You never have before, and it would just make your already kind of awkward relationship with them worse. When you already feel so crabbing awful, you don't want to cause any more strain! It's a win-win!

Their voice is filled with a false bravado that doesn't (and hasn't ever) reached their eyes. "So!~ What can I do for you this loop?"

Loop is Siffrin. Or was. You've known it from the first time you met them. It's all in the eyes. They have the same eyes. Loop's just turn up most of the time where Sif's turn down. You can tell they're the same when they're shocked or angry, though. It's... different, but still recognizable.

Is that fair? Loop is fundamentally very different from Siffrin. It's like a case of divergent evolution. They come from the same root, but they're different people. You're not actually sure if Loop likes or hates their differences from Sif. You've never asked.

Which is why you're not gonna say anything. They'd probably brush you off, anyway. Make a show of laughing it up and then they'd deflect. Just like Sif. Which… is a really mean thing to think about both of them. When did you start to get mean? Didn't everyone call you nice before this? Reliable?

"The King knows something about Sif." You say eventually. "Or, uh, something adjacent to Sif? They don't actually seem to know each other. Probably."

"Oh? Interesting! Maybe you could look into any similarities they have?" They wink.

You don't want to compare Sif to the King for a second. But… they're probably right. You flex your fingers, strain in your knuckles that you think is probably all in your head. Hah! You have no idea what loop your on, by the way! They'd probably know if you asked. You don't... want to. They can be hard to talk to.

But... Sif and the King. And to the same extent: both of them and Loop. You try to rack your brain for an answer. What's something that connects them? Something you see within all of them.

... Stars.

Huh. You're not sure how you didn't come up with that before. You sigh. Well! There's one place in the House you know for sure talks about stars. You don't go back there very often, mostly because it's kind of a dead end, but you guess it'll probably be useful! Plus: Sif seems to like talking about them. At least for a moment. Then it sort of... slips? You're not sure why that happens. You've got a few theories, though.

"Thanks, Loop." You tell them.

You mean it every time. You're not sure that they've ever believed you.

[stinkypeanutbutter]

silly headcanons pt 2‼️

here we go. . Yay

Whenever they go out, Ashlyn had to wear like a TON of sunscreen because she’s pale af (same)

Scratch what I said last time, Aiden actually likes spiders, but is scared of grasshoppers. Why? Because they keep jumping on him and towards him because they don’t mind their stupid business and are so big for no reason. Ashlyn agrees with this statement

Aiden is so scared of failing his parents, as they seem to have high expectations with him and he’s worried that whatever he does may not be good enough or doesn’t fit their criteria, even if his parents try and reassure him it’s fine to mess up something, referring to his past

Aiden and Taylor totally listen to vocaloid

Beach time? Ashlyn is hiding in the shade on her phone, occasionally going out to swim. . But goes back because the water is freakishly cold. Ben is making sand castles (with or without that little cousin I forgot her name) Logan is collecting shells and cool objects for the sand castle and observation purposes (nerd) Taylor and Tyler are splashing eachother and seeing who can swim faster (Tyler refuses to play but does anyway for her) And Aiden is catching sand crabs, swimming, and climbing the rocky areas to find creatures or lost items to show everyone else.

birthdays? Aiden buys the best gifts cause he rich and seems to know everyone the most because he’s intrusive. Ashlyn buys pretty good ones as well becuase of her hearing everything everywhere. Logan isn’t the best and struggles but pulls through well in the end. Ben makes his own birthday gifts from scratch like a pro!! Taylor and Tyler team up, and usually do well (especially with secret Santa)

Aiden never actually went trick or treating before (bozo) because of his constant traveling, so the most he could and would ever do is buy candy the night of and watch something alone. The buds got together for a day and all went trick or treating for Aidens sake and he loved it. (He scared many kids that day because he went as a clown lmao)

Aiden does graffiti art les go!!!! (Got in trouble once)

Aiden ALMOST went to jail, but it was just some old lady complaining about how he looked because he kept smiling at her and thought he was being cocky (he was)

Ben listens to metal (you just take a headphone from him and you hear screaming and a heavy instrumental 💀)

both Ashlyn and Ben also listen to orchestral music, Taylor occasionally because it appeases her mind.

Horror movies? Ben dos NOT like them, but watches for the others sake. Logan feels the same way, and covers his face anytime a jumpscare is coming up (fails each time, ends up seeing every jumpscare and screams, jumps into the arms of the nearest person) Ashlyn doesn’t get scared easily with them, but only when she can’t tell if one’s gonna happen or not. Tyler likes them, but doesn’t admit to being scared at times. Taylor and Aiden love them, actually talking about what parts they liked and what they could have done better on.

since people are doing these, here:

Bi Ashlyn, considers herself a girl, but also as nothing sometimes (idk the word)

Pan Aiden, doesn’t care who you are, just be able to tolerate him.

Tyler is a homophobic homosexual

Logan is bi, no major preferences.

Ben is a straight and ace

Taylor is ace and demi romantic

love how most people seemed to agree with Taylor and Ben being ace

Ashlyn and Taylor have girls nights sometimes, usually with Taylor taking a ton of photos and Ashlyn getting bombarded with questions from Aiden and Tyler (mostly Aiden)

TW!! SH

When it came to Aiden being a alone in his room and him moving around a lot, it was hard for him to feel anything besides loneliness, so he took to SH for a while, mostly on his upper thighs because he felt no one would see them as easily. Even now he starts it up again when he’s super upset and had really no way to get his frustration out, didn’t help with the constant mask he put up. He feels better, but every now and then his emotions slip and he starts it up again, going further without realizing. He wears a strong foundation to at least cover some of them up, but someone noticed. Who? That’s up for you to decide.

ok good bye thanks for reading!!11!! 😹🌝🤺

[pearlywritings]

Come with me, my love

synopsis: the best way to heal is to go somewhere else. Do not worry, your lover has already taken care of that.

pairing and characters: Albedo, Diluc, Kaeya, Zhongli x reader (separately)

tw: pure fluff, hurt/comfort

word count: 2.9k+ words in total

author’s note: I dedicate it to my dear @lunargrapejuice , I hope this will bring you comfort you need, my dear 💛 and also to anyone else who is in desperate need of it☺

Albedo

The concept of relationship is fairly new to Albedo, he’s still exploring the field and is learning new things, even though you two have already changed the status to official. However, he is unbelievably observant, and his ability to note anomalies comes in handy when it concerns you.

Lately he’s noticed how you haven’t been your usual self - the bubbly, smiley, affectionate, lively self with energy almost bursting out of your body. You’ve become grim, sluggish, and didn't come to him for a kiss or a hug unless it was him who approached you and gave you those. In the moments like this you were clinging to him, as if fearing he’d break the comforting atmosphere and go back to his research. But the one thing the young man understood about relationships is the importance of being there for your partner. 

Albedo didn’t ask you to tell him what’s wrong - you’ll open up to him when you are ready if you’d ever feel like that - he knows and trusts you. He just holds you close until you doze off and only then comes back to his work table to wrap up whatever is hanging and call it a night.

When it goes like this for over a week, the blond becomes really concerned and understands that it requires some more drastic measures. He officially submits documents for a couple of days off to Jean, informs his alchemist team about his absence and starts researching and planning an immaculate solution to the issue before him.

The gathered data eventually suggests that going out somewhere away from bustling places of constant presence and unwinding is what usually helps to deal with growing depression. You might think his first thought would be taking you out to Dragonspine. After all, the scenery is breath-taking (when there are no raging blizzards), it’s serene and mostly quiet, and no one can disturb you two.

…well, he considered it.

But ultimately he decided on a beach day. Just you, and him, and Klee, since he knows how strongly you adore the little troublemaker. Listen, maybe taking a child who loves fish blasting to the lake isn’t the best idea, but Albedo checked and rechecked her belongings to make sure everything exploding was left home before actually going there.

Weaponizing Klee's charms was a clever decision and proved to be effective. The pyro user becomes your energizer as she constantly asks you to search for seashells, play with her in the water, draw Dodoko on the sand (Albedo, who joins you in almost every activity, undoubtedly wins this one), search for seashells some more, play with a ball, build sand castles…

You plop onto your towel only when the girl starts chasing the crabs, gleefully laughing and swinging her bucket in which she was going to put her new "friend". Your lover hums, keeping an eye out for her to not get into any sort of predicament and sits down next to you, side by side, bending one leg and resting his arm on the knee.

“How’s the vitamin D absorption going?” You chuckle at his choice of words, but then again, you spent so much time inside your shared apartment, of course your organism started lacking the sun rays.

“Pretty awesome, I must admit,” rearranging your body so you could lie down with the man still sitting close, you give your body a good stretch, contently sighing.

“Glad to hear that,” elegant artistic fingers reach out to brush the stray locks from your face, and you quickly catch his wrist, bringing it to your lips to leave a soft kiss.

“Thank you, ‘bedo. I am sorry if I caused you trouble with my… well…” You trail off, but of course he understands what you mean.

“No need to apologize,” a small, but warm smile graces his lips, “You didn’t cause me any trouble, sunshine.”

At the sweet petname your heart skips a beat and mouth twists in your attempts to not reveal a stupid grin. The Chief Alchemist is enchanted by you, so bright and shining, drinking in your soft expressions and bashful body language.

The mission deems to be a success, but solidifying the results with late night cuddles back home wouldn’t hurt.

Diluc

The owner of the Dawn Winery hates parting with you for longer than a work day, even though sometimes the list of his duties keeps him away from you for exactly over a full work day. That’s why he loathes business trips that require his presence.

You hate those too, because it means you won’t get to get a morning kiss from him and give him one, share breakfast with him, see him throughout a day and sneak sweet kisses and hand holdings in private of the backroom of the tavern, walk with him or welcome him home, feel his arms around you when he climbs through the window of your shared bedroom at the winery after his late night endeavors…

You won’t get to see his vibrant eyes - hazy with sleep, sharp when annoyed and absolutely swirling with adoration when he gazes at you. You won’t get to whine for him to stay in bed for just a little longer, because the warmth of his body is too precious to lose so easily. You won’t get to drag his gloves off of his hands when he doesn’t go out in the city at night, preferring to go to sleep with you. You won’t get to braid or unbraid his flaming hair, massage his scalp and listen to his calm content breathing, as he eagerly leans in your arms.

You get the point - business trips are the worst.

And your feelings are completely mutual on Diluc’s end, even if some of the reasons for him feeling agitated may vary.

This is exactly why you are planting your feet on one of the streets of Fontaine, holding onto your fiance’s hand and curiously looking around you. This time the man’s heart ached when he saw an absolutely heart-broken look on your face when he informed you of yet another we-cannot-sign-this-deal-without-you business trip. The past two weeks had been hard for both of you, and the lack of seeing each other only worsened your mood and made you feel so miserable. A week more without him? You didn’t think you’d endure it without crying, because everything was pressing on your shoulders and it was suffocating, nearly crushing.

The decision was fast and simple - going there together. While Diluc Ragnvindr enjoys privacy, he feels pride at the idea of showing his amazing significant other - soon to become a spouse - off. The amount of mischief concealed within the multiple walls of his character can’t help but look forward to you cutting off the suitors that inevitably come after the young wine tycoon. He knows you can do it just with a single glance and that’s one of the things he loves about you - the power of your beautiful eyes. He himself is weak before the effect of them.

“So… This is Fontaine…” You whisper in awe, still observing everything your gaze has an opportunity to be cast upon. Your hand is still clinging onto his, and something flutters in the male’s chest, when you gently tug on it, urging him to move after you.

“First things first - we are purchasing the Kamera. I want to capture all the moments we’ll share here,” at your proclamation Diluc softly chuckles, briefly turning around and signaling for the servants to unload your carriage and bring everything into the house he rented for you to stay in.

“Sure, my flame. I’d love that as well.”

You grin happily - looks like there is no trace of your previous depressed state anymore. A day in the carriage huddled in blankets together managed to heal your sullen mood and partially feed your desire for being close with him. Don’t think he didn’t enjoy it too, only Celestia above knows how desperately this man craved your presence and affection - it’s just that you and your satisfaction come first.

This trip must give you many memories and Diluc will make sure to spend all the free time he’ll have with you. Oh, but to think of it, in his busy time he also can have you there, because what are they gonna do? Revoke the deal they themselves begged him to consider? Exactly - no.

You are stuck with him, and honestly, this is the best thing when we are talking about two touch-starved and presence-craving lovers.

Kaeya

“Kaeya, I am nervous.”

“You better not be, she’ll sense that you are not in control.”

“You are not helping!”

The man, whose leg literally brushes against yours, as the two horses - a pitch black one and golden with flaxen mane and tail one - slowly march side by side along the road of a Starfell Valley, finds it cute. Finds you cute. A crease between your eyebrows from before disappeared and the look on your face was replaced with such adorable concern. You really don’t have anything to worry about, the girl he chose for you is the calmest specimen he has in stables, very docile and friendly, having been won by you with a piece of apple you offered to her prior to this walk. It is really much better when getting you on his stallion, who is not that tolerant to the people who are not Kaeya himself.

“Do not worry, I am not letting go of her reins until you are ready to try it yourself,” he assures you in a soft voice, which smoothness infiltrates all your senses and lulls the rising unease. “Swing your body lightly back and forth with the horse’s steps, it’ll help you to stay in the saddle and help you feel the movement under you. Trust me, it’ll help.”

“O-oh, alright,” with his palm pressed against the small of your back, you try doing as he says, carefully moving your body. His thumb gently rubs your skin under a thin blouse, assuring you that everything is okay, and, when you glance at him from the corner of your eyes, he offers you a sweet smile, murmuring ‘god job, snowflake’ just above the whisper. It makes your heart flutter and lips form a small smile of your own. Your lover is your salvation, really. The moment he saw your gloomy face upon arriving home, he knew he’d go any lengths to bring a smile back to your face. Kaeya consoled and cuddled you that evening, and a couple of days later took you out of the city to spend his day off together.

A horse walk idea has been stuck in his mind for a month already, after you became a witness of him training recruits, the ones that signed for cavalry. Him, on his stallion, with reins in one hand and a training sword in another, entranced you, to the point you snapped out of your stupor only when he hopped on the ground and approached you with a teasing smirk. 

Now his words and expressions lack the usual banter, the softness of his cerulean eye blending with the spotless sky above, the rustle of his lips being like one of the grass and leaves the wind plays with, and his smile warmer than the afternoon sun. He belongs in Mondstadt so much. He belongs next to you so much.

Wouldn’t have it any other way.

Kaeya’s visible eye widens when you, using stirrups, rise and reach to him, pressing your lips together. The hand on your back instantly slides further and settles on your hip, keeping you steadied, as his mouth slowly devours yours. He senses no more negative feelings inside your body, and it sparks joy in his chest, which spreads through his body in waves of lingering warmth.

Your eyes sparkle when you separate and the man nearly lets go of both his and your reins, reprimanded by his horse’s disgruntled snort.

“Thank you, Kae,” Archons your smile is blinding, “I needed it.”

“No need to thank me. I got you. Always,” and you giggle when he smooches right under your chin.

“So, when can I trot?”

“Trot?” He nearly snorts at your zeal. “Haven’t even held the reins, and wanna trot already?”

“But you looked so elegant while doing so!”

“Got you mesmerized, eh?” You lightly pinch a hand still resting on your hip. “Ouch! Goodness, Y/n, can’t you admit you are head over heels for this Cavalry Captain?”

“In your dreams, Alberich,” you stick a tongue at him and the man is completely reassured that his Y/n is back.

“Then I’ll be waiting in my dreams. As for reality, I wouldn’t be opposed to giving my love private lessons in horse-riding.”

“Oh! Can we start today?” Eager, aren’t you? How lovely.

“Consider we’ve already started.”

Zhongli

The snowflakes are dancing in the sky, twirling and slowly lowering to the snow-covered ground, pristine whiteness almost blinding with how every tiny frozen crystal reflects the sunlight and sparkles like the finest gems of the Liyue mines. The crust is crunching under your legs, as you and your husband are taking your morning walk in the vast lands of Snezhnaya.

Truth to be spoken, Zhongli would’ve probably never found himself on the territory of the Cryo Archon, but this is a special case. He knew how badly you needed a change of place and new experience in your current dispirited state. No surprise he agreed almost immediately, when during his last visit to the land of Morax Childe invited the two of you to stay with him and his wife in their homeland. He promised no interruption from the Tsaritsa or the Harbingers, and, knowing that partially the invitation was surely coming from the ginger’s lover, whom he had met and whom both him and you found very pleasant to be around, the man believed it.

At first the idea of coming to Snezhnaya worried you, but Zhongli didn’t miss the curious and excited glint in your pretty eyes. He gave you time to consider the idea, and a week later the three of you were on a ship, half-way to the country of snow. The woman carrying Ajax’ real last name welcomed you warmly and with a big smile on her face, chewing her husband lightly for not having invited you two earlier.

The atmosphere that prevailed in this house surely helped distract you from oppressive thoughts, and exploring outside with your caring husband made you so tired, but in a pleased kind of sense, that you didn’t have the energy to spend it on anything but share a goodnight kiss with Zhongli and fall asleep in his comforting embrace. You were healing, and it couldn’t but delight him. 

You took a liking to the walks in the early hours of morning, because it, as you proclaimed, was very refreshing for the beginning of the day. Being a morning person Zhongli always joins you on your little outings. Childe introduced a thermos to you two, and ever since your husband tends to have it on him whenever you are outside. The tea in there has a calming and soothing effect, meticulously prepared by skillful hands with love and care.

Another thing you both became fond of was dancing. Just like snowflakes in the air you spin in each other’s embrace, heavy cloaks with fur collars barely swiping the snow under your feet. A soft melody hummed in deep voice mixed with gleeful giggles, turning into a shared laughter soon into the dance that really didn’t have any name.

Sometimes though the quietness around you awakes a feeling of loneliness and you can’t help but shed tears, face pressed to his chest with his arms wrapped tightly around your form. He lets you cry and release the negative emotions, gently swaying your bodies to some rhythm existing only in the beat of his heart. He tries to swipe your tears before they turn into the frozen droplets and sting your eyes or bite your cheeks.

The usual expensive leather of his gloves is replaced by thick wool and feels warm against your face, as his big palms cradle it in his delicate hold.

“My gem…” the puff of hot air from his mouth caresses your nose - that’s how close he is - and you cutely wrinkle it. “Don’t you think we should return? It’s been almost an hour, your skin is burning from the cold already.”

“Must we really?” An adorable pout doesn’t work on a stoic man, as he lets go of your face and, to the accompaniment of your squeals, hoists you in his arms bridal style.

“If you refuse to use your two legs, then I’ll just carry you,” his smile is disarming, damn him.

“All the way back?”

“Why, of course, my dear. Do you question my strength?”

“No, of course not! It’s just…” Though your cheeks are already red, he doesn’t mistake the way you avert your eyes in quiet embarrassment.

“Oh, is this position making you shy? Don’t worry, I am sure our hosts will understand.”

“You..!” The man chuckles lightheartedly, not having it in him to stop himself from teasing you. Ah, this truly is refreshing, and Zhongli is so elated to see a once again happy smile that you desperately try to hide in the fur of your coat.

[thedivineflowers]

HII!! My first time requesting so I feel a little silly, I love your works and as a former middle schooler I love thinking of these silly dudes as my brothers and I can imagine it really well through your writing and your humor is just like mine! In your parental terms fic I read Azul offer us a job at Mostro lounge and I honestly wanna know the daily activities and goofiness that happens on our work shifts😭 feel free to decline this I can’t wait for you deuces mom fic!<3🙈

Ofc ofc and I won't decline this masterpiece bb.

School night:

Clocking in at work:

When you clock in at work you gotta be early and then go to Azul's VIP room so you can tell him about the bitch who stole your test answers and eat your snack.

If you don't clock in at the right time you will be called and texted multiple times and hunted down by the twins who are just as worried about you as Azul.

When you're done with your snack you go change into your work uniform which is the dorm uniform but you have a lounge pin on your bowtie which has a tracker so Azul can keep an eye on you. And you also get your own version of Azul's coat because I know it's cold as fuck in that damn lounge.

Near beginning of shift:

If at any point you have to take a break not even one madol will be taken off your payment no matter how long your break is.

And ofc you goof off and you're allowed to be mean to the customers.

"Hey, I wanted clams not crabs!" A customer shouted at you. "AND I WANTED A SEA PONY, LIFE AINT FAIR." You shouted at the customer and threw a knife and fork on their plate.

You and Floyd are allowed to throw people out of the Lounge and you two mostly throw people out together.

You hold the person by their hands and Floyd holds them by their feet. You start swinging the person towards the opened lounge doors. "One..." You started "Two..." Floyd said "THREE!!" You both shouted at the same time and threw the ex customer out and closed the door with a satisfied sigh.

And sometimes if you can or want to Azul would host shows for you to entertain the audience and get more Madol 😈😈😈. And to make the school fear you. 🧍‍♂️

Middle of shift:

At this time you get a thirty minute break. You mostly get your breaks with the twins so they mostly take you to go feed the sea animals and try to help you with your homework if you have any. Or if you have nothing to do you go bother the other workers and scare them. More than half of them bitches are scared of your feral ass so you just gotta do some oogly boogly shit and theyll be saying sorry.

When your break ends you have to go back to work. But you are left in charge of the lounge when Jade and Floyd have to go observe a deal with Azul. So you mostly have customers complain to you while the twins are away and you get this time to mess with them if it's something stupid.

And most of the time is stuff about how they did not like the food when they just wanted to not pay for their food. They say this while they're paying and then demand a whole ass refund so you go into the secret monopoly money stash and give it to them saying it's limited edition madol. 🧍‍♂️🧍‍♂️

And sometimes Azul himself will come in to see how things are doing and will chat with the guests but he's just watching and making sure that you're alright and don't need a break cause dawg you're a fucking kid working a whole ass job trying to get paid more than what Crowley gives you and you got all this stuff to do bro you couldn't even enjoy being a kid anymore when you first met the old ass man😔 😒.

Near the end of the shift:

At this time it's when the lounge starts closing up and people start leaving and this means extra money and coins to snatch 😈😈. You find about 500 madol lying around throughout the lounge and Azul says you can keep it most of the time.

And around this time Azul has you eat your dinner and calm down after working and you change out of your uniform right when the clock hits 9 (idfk so ima take a guess and say nine through ten at night). And when Azul makes sure your homework is completed and correct you'd be allowed to do whatever.

And sometimes it's too late to be walking out by yourself so Azul and the twins have you sleep in your own dorm room over there and if Grims with you he has his own bed and blankets next to yours. (It was demanded that the cat gets a bed by you or else you'd go bat shit around Azul's office. 🧍‍♂️) and you have your own matching pajama set that's similar to Azul so after you're done getting ready for bed you'd go in Azul's office sometimes to keep him company and drag him to his room because his eyebags look this close to being able to hold a whole fucking Walmart.

Weekend:

Clocking in:

It's morning time and you're ass is waking up at fucking 10 in the morning because you slept at 4 and almost pulled an all nighter.

You have to go to Azul's office when you wake up or else Azul will give you the day off to sleep and gaggle around.

And when you finish eating your breakfast and waking up you get to change into your uniform and choose what you want to do, paper work, keeping Azul company, or working with the twins.

You still get paid so 💃.

But sometimes Azul will have you turn into a merfolk by drinking a potion and you get to swim around the aquarium and spook the customers.

Middle of shift:

You get your break and your lunch to eat and it's free because you were able to say hello to Lucious the other day during the animal speech class.

And after that you get to do whatever you want or you could go and observe one of Azul's contract agreements thingies with the twins.

And if they try to like swing at Azul you get to go batshit and drag them outside while Azul cleans up his office for his next contract.

Near end of shift:

This time it's a little later which is 10 at night and you all clean up yiddy yadda but you get more extra change because you performed earlier.

Then you get to change out of your uniform once Azul tells you and you immediately have to take a shower then get ready for bed because you don't know when you're gonna sleep.

And obviously have no homework (🤮🤮 EEWWWWW) so you get stay up worh Azul and the twins watching national geographic, cooking shows, extreme cheapskates, boxing matches or basketball games. One of those. And you all end up sleeping on the couch in your room where the TV is (you're fucking spoiled) and sometimes you all would just sit around and gossip but no one knows what goes on in your room but the lights are always on until morning 😨. So far Floyd has taught you how to give a hug bigger than his 🤗. You've sent three people to the infirmary in less than two hours in school.

You obviously stay over because no one wants to go out that fucking late unless you're getting paid to go and rock someones shit 😒.

YEYEYEYEYEYEYYEY

I LOVE THOS SM JWHWBWJWJWJWM

Anyways I hope you like it. I know i was like kinda late I'm still working on the other ones so def look forward to those 😘😘😘

[luverbov]

𐀔 (𝓢) igzai headcanons ィ

“ I never understood, what i was born for “

↺ requested by a friend ( <3 ) fluff 𔓘 ooc

ꕀ Pre-relationship

Ah, so we ignore chapter 114 and Mersault goes smoothly along with Fyodors death, Sigma is finally free, and so Dazai keeps his promise and recruits him to the ADA where he had his entrance exam and our silly casino boy passed.

Sigma sits next to Atsushi, they know each other a little and I feel like they'd be really good friends so!

Sigma is Atsushi's partner (CAUSE Dazai's is Kunikida) and sometimes Dazai gets jealous and whines so he can work with Sigma once every now-and-then.

Since Atsushi is still Dazai's subordinate, I think Sigma would be Kunikida's but they switch sometimes.

Sometimes Dazai goes up to Atsushi and tells him fetch him a coffee, which Atsushi- being the sweetheart he is, obliges to. But really, Dazai just wanted to steal Atsushi's place for a few minutes to annoy and flirt with Sigma.

Dazai takes Sigma down the coffee shop downstairs and Sigma has to watch his painfully horrible attempts of flirting with the waitress and shamelessly embarrassing himself which is lowkey funny to Sigma.

I dunno why I feel like Sigma has givin Dazai the silent treatment a lot and Dazai whines and begs him for attention, he's just spoiled like that ¯\_( ツ )_/¯

Dazai was the one to confess because Sigmas a pussy and I feel like it happened on accident too

ꕀ They're inlove

Honestly Ranpo and Yosano wonders why they didn't date sooner, it was so obvious they were into each other that even Kunikida noticed. Anyways after a few months of teasing and flirting, Dazai grew some balls and asked Sigma out with Ranpo's assistance.

Sigma gives Dazai dark chocolate sometimes, esp after a mission because Dazai likes dark chocolate, FIGHT THE WALL. Dazai loves these little presents and you can catch a glimpse of actual happiness when he receives these. Not silliness. Happiness.

In return Dazai takes Sigma out and treats him to street food (esp crab) because Sigma practically grew up in the Sky Casino, he probably has never had these.

Dazai loves to brag about Sigma to Chuuya and Kunikida, and both of them questions how Sigma deals with Dazai, and honestly, poor boy has no idea either, he just does.

"Well I have a lover! I don't see anyone chasing after you Chuuya~"

Dazai loves rambling about his day to Sigma while cuddling, it makes him feel so safe as Sigma gently strokes Dazai's hair and listen to him rant.

THEY MOVED IN TOGETHER.

Sometimes, Sigma gets woken by Dazai whispering stupid stuff at like 2am which mostly just to piss Sigma off. Dazai always apologizes afterwards and makes it up with gifts and cookies.

Dazai loves admiring Sigma sleep, like they'll be cuddling with Dazai on a sleeping Sigmas chest and Dazai just traces his face gently and plays with his hair

Dazai is a big fan of physical touch so he'll always be grabbing Sigmas waists and hips, he's a lap-sitter for sure and he doesn't mind PDA. They'll be solving a case together and Dazai would randomly kiss Sigmas cheek and enjoy the flustered reaction as Sigma tries to hide his rosy cheeks.

Dazai is a "honey, dear, angel, beautiful" typa guy while Sigma is a "my love, sweetheart" typa guy. I don't think any of them uses "babe, darling, ect." ( Chuuya tho 👀 )

Sigmas kisses are short, gentle pecks which Dazai is more of a sultry, sensual and teasing kiss cause he's just Dazai.

They slow dance from time to time because it reminds them of the day they met, the whole ADA finds it adorable.

ᐢ..ᐢ Shout out to my friend @8st-rjj for helping me, mwah ! ᨒ

⊹　 ︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶　 ୨୧　 ︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶︶　 ⊹

[lazywriter-artist]

Shrimp themed Biologis and Crayfish techpreist apprentice anyone? (You guys get a fun lore dump with these doodles so strap in—)

Crunch—

Lore below the cut 🫶

So basically

Shimp-Biologis is silly and cool bc he’s technically not SOLELY tech, he’s mutated flesh and shit that’s melded with his tech exoskeleton (hence why he gets the gift of functional mouth) but this is very strenuous on his fleshy form. This is why the Biologis’s body is shaped around and themed after a shrimp (also why he doesn’t wear traditional robes, gets in the way of swimming)

Within his lab is this large tank (think of an inground pool situation in the middle of this lab which has stairs to a second level like some kind of aquarium) which he spends most of his time in due to the strain it is on his body to be out the water. He is able to traverse dry land but it gets very exhausting and he has to scurry back to the tank for a much needed old man nap. With a strong interest in humans he is definitely much more sympathetic to their plights then most of the Admechs but with a double edged sword he also finds a morbid curiosity in how their innards work— so— keep an eye on him cause his scalpels normally aren’t far from him—

But that’s also where the crayfish based techpreist comes in! Being a more traditional rejected the human flesh Mechanicus they are appropriately made for out of water travel so to aid their mentor (sh rimp) and to provide aid in whatever means necessary. This is also why they have them big honking claws, it is much easier to lift you Magos back into the water with big claws then tiny frail leg hands! Behind those beady red eyes they are a bit more interested in warfare then their mentor’s study but they’re one of the only other techpreist with waterproofing and the other one is a crab Logis whom is always by the Archmagos’s side so perhaps they’re better suited here anyway, the Omnissiah’s wish.

Also a bit of nerd stuff about designing these bastards is—

[Insert sobbing and crying image]

The crayfish themed character was easy enough as their defining features are

> big claw

> big antenna

> big carapace

And with some other inspiration aka Crush crawfish—

The design was not that hard to whammy outta my brain— HOWEVER Shrimp for some reason just WONT come out of my brain just as easily?!

As really the defining feature of shrimps are

> pi nk

> shrimp C posture

>funny legs

So it was a big struggle to sketch out The Biologis’s design while his crayfish friend was not so hard to get on paper 🙄 (and yes this is also also why he doesn’t wear robes is bc A I didn’t work all your dumbass body out to cover it up and B I can’t figure out how your dumbass robes would fall anyway so hah)

All and all mostly happy with them!! (Also also ALSO do expect more lore dumps since I’m further fleshing out my other AdMech’s stories 😈😈😈)

[unreadpoppy]

Anyways, here are my favorite bears

These are not all species of bears, just my faves. Also, no order cause I can't brink myself to rank these babies. Under the cut cause longpost

Beggining with a lesser known one, the only bear species that exists in south america is the Spectecled Bear (also known as the Andean Bear)

They have this name because of the white/cream markings on their face that can somewhat resemble glasses! As I said before, they're the only south american species of bear and is the last short faced bear alive, and most are found in the Andes. I like them because look at that cute little face and also latino solidarity. Fun fact, Paddington is a specteled bear considering he is from Peru.

Now moving on. She is beauty, she is grace, she is the largest species of bear AND the largest land predator, she is the Polar Bear

Few fun facts. Polar Bear's scientific name is Ursus maritmus (which would very roughly translate to sea bear) bc of how much time they spend swimming (which also means they are grear swimmers!). They are the most carnivorous of the bears, and imo, they will eat anything that is made of meat. The reason you see so many pictures of mother bears hugging their cubs is because of the cold. Althought, when they are old, their fur is great to protect from the harsh weahter, when they are young they are still vulnerable to it, so mama bears hugs her cubs to keep them warm. Oh and another thing, I discovered that bears can do this thing where they'll find a hole in the ice where seals come up to breath and they just...sit there and wait for it to happen (and they can wait for a LONG time). I love how cute they are when they're young and how fierce they are as adults, and honestly, look at their faces, I love them a lot.

Next, we're back in the american continent, this time with the American Black Bear

The american black bear has a lot of subspecies, which are mostly different colors than their signature black fur, they are omnivorous (and they will eat anything, like i've seen videos of them eating crabs and moths), and also, they are really good climbers! They are mostly found in North America, and they are a bit more chill, like if you ever encounter a black bear, you can scare it away by making yourself look big and making loud noises. They don't have the shoulder hump that brown bears have, and their ears are more prominent (which makes them so freaking cute.) Also, there has been black bears who have made their dens inside of trees, which i think is cool .

Lastly, this might be cheating, but it's a subspecies of the black bear, which is the Kermode Bear

Mostly found in British Columbia, the kermode bear is also known as the spirit bear or the ghost bear, due to their white fur (important to note that they do not have albinism, look at their noses and eyes). The gene that makes them white is a recessive gene, so they are very rare. It's believed that they might be more succesful when hunting fish bc of their fur color, which could make the fish believe that they are a cloud. I love how different they are, how rare they are, and how beautiful they look, especially in contrast with the green around them.

As an honourable mention, I'll talke not about a species but an individual bear known was Grizzly 399.

(she's the mother in case you couldn't tell). She and her cubs can be found in the Yellowstone National Park, and she's the most famous brown bear in the world. She is famous for how many cubs she has had and raised (22 cubs and grandcubs) and she lives in proximity to humans (some believe that the reason she does that is to avoid the male bears when she has cubs). Also she has learned and taught her progeny how to avoid getting hit by cars, and she's a very old bear. (having 27/28 years, which trust me, for bears is a lot and she's still having cubs!). There have been hunters who claimed to have killed Grizzly 399 but they were all lies as she is very alive and well with her cubs. Also, forgot to mention, the reaosn she has had so many cubs is because while most bears give birth to 1 or 2 cubs, 399 often births twins and triplets, and she has had quadruplets which is very rare for most bears (and she raised them succesfully, which is even more impressive).

Anyways, these are my favorite bears.

[nekole-doodles]

Next on the DSMP-coded song series! #2

C! Tommy and specifically C! Crimeboys

"Do you miss me, you sad lady, 'cause I'm really feeling down" Tommy after Wilbur's death since things are going wrong with New L'manberg and Tommy still misses Wilbur despite Ghostbur being around.

"Do you miss what you thought you were, back when you thought you knew what you are" This can be talking about both Tommy and Wilbur, especially post-revival. I feel like Tommy and Wilbur would miss L'manberg days partially due to the fact they actually had a role, a purpose that they knew. Tommy was always more of a follower but since everyone around him(except Wilbur) are moving on while he's stuck in the past, he doesn't know who he's supposed to be anymore and finds himself without a purpose. Wilbur *needs* a purpose now that he's back from being in Limbo for more than 13 years. After years of doing *nothing*, he wants to do something again, be someone noteworthy. However, he isn't the general or president of L'manberg and he technically isn't the unstable destroyer of L'manberg either. I headcanon that Wilbur puts up a facade that we see in the DSMP lore during his rivalry with Quackity/Las Nevadas to feel like he has a purpose and is making an impact.

"Where you are, I don't care, I just want to be a part of something" Tommy went along with Wilbur after they were revived to cling onto what his purpose was before Wilbur died which was to basically be a part of whatever Wilbur is planning. He wanted to be a part of something, they both did, hence Wilbur's rivalry with Quackity.

"When I was 16, I was dead, I was sick from being underfed" Tommy's second exile. He didn't literally die but he would definitely feel like he was either dead or dying for most of exile.

"When I was 10, I hated you, you hurt me, it's what you do" This mostly goes along with Pogtopia and Revived Crimeboys. Wilbur wasn't good for Tommy, no matter how much Wilbur genuinely loved and cared for Tommy. He would always end up hurting him one way or another. Even when Wilbur tried to stop hurting Tommy(and everyone in general) by leaving the Dream SMP, he still ended up hurting him. It's honestly quite tragic.

"Do you miss me Stephanie[Wilbur], 'cause I'm really missing you." For after Wilbur dies or after Wilbur leaves, for obvious reasons.

[sophiasharp]

I think I might be the sole target audience for this but

The Papas during Lobster Mini-Season

Primo

Designated boat driver

Really good sense of direction, helps a lot when it comes to keeping track of old hot spots

Can also cheat and just magic his way into figuring out where all the lobster are hiding. Don’t tell the regulars, they’ll be pissed

Enjoys singing along to the radio while his brothers do most of the actual catching

Goes out again when the rest have their fill to his own secret spots. Enjoys some peace and quiet, taking his time catching his limit. He refuses to tell his brothers where he goes and it pisses them off to no end lol

Secondo

Beach! Bum! Secondo! My! Beloved!

More of a Vegas guy but still LOVES him some ocean time, especially in The Keys. Viva La Conch Republic babyyyyyy!

Gets day drunk while he’s on the boat but then has ruthless efficiency in the water. Soon as he’s out again, the buzz comes back. No one has any idea how the fuck that works.

Is the one that makes sure they adhere to the legal limit. “I refuse to get our asses arrested and have the Ministry deal with that PR issue just because we got greedy with some sea roaches. I’m on thin ice as is, that would just be embarrassing.”

Puts the lobsters he catches in his own personal cooler. This also happens to be where he keeps his drinks. He doesn’t seem to mind so no one questions it.

Insists on listening to Jimmy Buffett when he’s in charge of the boat and at any other opportunity.

Terzo

Weirdly competitive about it, has this inherent need to be The Best at lobster catching. Probably the Middle Sibling Instinct kicking in.

Him and Secondo go head to head every year over who can get more over the mini-season. They’re about evenly matched skill-wise so it tends to go back and forth every year.

Will sometimes start arguments in the water over a catch

“That one was mine! I chased it out of the hole when your bald ass got in the way and stole it!” “I found that lobster fair and square and you know it, fuck off” “Right sure, and Nihil loves us. I hope you sunburn your skull, stronzo.”

There have been slap fights between two grown men in 4 feet of water.

Was the one to figure out that the lobster are calmer and taste better when you keep them on ice. It took. An embarrassing amount of time for them to figure that out. They started this tradition before Google, alright? Give them a break.

Likes to sing along to the radio as well, but makes up new lyrics when Secondo gets on his nerves.

Copia

New to this whole thing cause he was scared of getting in the water and having to pick the lobsters up by hand. Mostly just slept on the boat in years prior

Now that he’s Papa though the others made him participate with them.

He is. Very nervous. First time he scared a lobster out of a hole he somehow scared out a second that was faced the other way and it swam directly at his face, scaring the absolute shit out of him.

His snorkel keeps falling over his ear :(

Lost his net and his tickle stick in water with 4 feet of visibility, managed beyond all odds to find them again, then lost his looper in the process of catching something.

Somehow still managed to get the biggest lobster of the day. Like cartoonishly so. It was his big trophy. They cooked it for him for dinner as a reward for his first outing.

Nihil

Just here so the brothers can increase their legal limit.

He’s become one with the sea grass

Sleeping with the fishies

Don’t worry he’ll wake up when a crab tries to bite his ass