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everlesslahote1 · 4 years

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“I’d do it all over again sir” (Paul Lahote) -Request

“Could I get a Paul x reader set in eclipse where he imprints on an old friend of Carlisle who is a vamp/shifter but the wolves don’t know that and she is sassy but he try’s to fight the imprint then in the fight she is badass and shifts and he and the wolves are just kind of in awe...abit of angst but fluff ending?”

-Umm ofc you lovely being, this caught my eye and I was like “omg I love this” so this should be fun. Only thing I am going to change is the x reader and make this a oc and if it bothers you to much let me know and ill change it, Thank you❤.

Paul Lahote x oc

(warning: None that I know of)

-Enjoy!

“Nila, to what do I own this pleasure?” Carlisle said who was happy but confused to see his old friend when her coven was in Utah.

Him and his family now stood on the porch of their lovely home looking up at the girl who clung to a tall tree after hearing the ruckus she rumbled in the woods.

“You know words get around Car , What’s this newborn battle I’m hearing about” she said jumping from the tall tree she was handing from.

“A team up with the wolfs to kick newborn ass, duh” Emmet said as he leaned on the on the banister.

Nila smirked before dropping her face.

He and Nila never really saw eye to eye but they wouldn’t say they ‘hated’ each other just a firm dislike.

He was going to be the biggest in the house but not the toughest, he wanted to give it a go after not seeing her for a while,

“If it isn’t the dumbest Cullen or... should I give that to Edward for falling in love a human” she said looking between Emmet and Edward with her light brown eyes.

Since she wasn’t fully Vampire she didn’t have to drink blood, she could live off human food too.

She only chose human food because she knew everyone’s input on vampires, they all think their sum blood thirsty monster’s.

Her skin wasn’t hot to the touch but wasn’t ice cold either, it was warm like A perfect day to wear a sundress to the beach.

“Why don’t you come in, we were just discussing our plans” Carlisle said with a open hand to the door of his home.

She gave a warm smile to Esme, Rose, Alice, and Jasper which they kindly returned, while she shot a bird at Emmet and not even taking notice to Edward a second time as she stepped into their home.

“Hasn’t changed a bit” she said more to her self looking around.

“so their after Edwards walking blood bag, Why?” Nila said now knowing everything but why they were coming for Bella.

“We have no idea” Carlisle said ignoring the snarky comment from his friend, he knew how she was about anything new and a human in love with a vampire is new for everybody.

She rolled her eye’s, looking over at the window, there stood a huge tan man in a muscle shirt with cut off jean shorts and black shoes.

His hair was cut low and he smelled of woods and sweat.

“I take it he’s the wolf she lead on while pale face ran off” she said now looking back at Esme.

“Okay how long does she need to stay I mean really, all she’s doing is making comments on everything!” Bella said as Rose chuckled and Nila smirked.

Rose was known for getting under Bella’s skin so she enjoyed watching others do as such, when they first met she knew she had to befriend this little ball of fire.

This is just adding to their bond.

“Hold your tongue or I’ll throw you to the little monsters myself, if anything I’m helping save your ass” She said only half joking on first part.

Which was true, she was helping but she wasn’t doing it for Bella, she was doing it to pay Carlisle back for saving her life almost 60 years ago.

Carlisle found a 16 year old Nila beaten and bruised by her abusive uncle who took her in after her parents died, left for dead in a alley way like she was nothing.

She was beaten so bad, he soon turned her seeing it was the only thing to save her life, all without knowing she would turn into a massive wolf.

It caused problem’s for him and Esme, her anger toward the man who left her for dead almost controlling her making her faze at least 7 times a day.

Then being something that even the oldest of vampire’s have never heard of, the first of her kind and the only.

A Wolf with the same abilities as a vampires.

A hybrid.

After she learned to control her heightened emotions, Carlisle gave her a choice to stay but she wanted to see the world.

And that he understood.

So she left, later finding a small Vampire coven who soon became her family but she never forgot bout the Cullen Coven, the people who saved her life.

Bella swallowed hard before a glaring Edward grabbed her hand and walked out the room.

“I still like you, I still like her” Rose said smirking at her mate which caused him to roll his eyes.

“we train with the wolfs tomorrow at noon in a open field, be ready” Jasper said as the family walked the hybrid to the door of their home.

“See’ya soldier” she said as her small figure disappears into the night.

The Next Day...

“Again!” Nila watched Emmet shout at Jasper after losing a match.

“hey, maybe you should give it a break. Ya know? before you pop a bicep” Nila said as she leaned on a tree , not to far back.

Emmet groaned trying to ignore the smart mouth women as his mate kisses his cheek and patted his shoulder.

“Don’t be a sore loser babe” she said smirking as she smiled with Nila.

Rosalie was really liking Nila being around, it was fun having someone to be a buddy with even though the others were dreading it or didn’t pay it any mind she was here.

Everyone treated Rose like she was bomb, one wrong move and the blonde would blow up in everyone’s face.

Which was kind of true but she liked the fact that Nila treated her normally, like she wasn’t cold hearted.

Like she wasn’t on egg shells around her.

Like she wasn’t a monster.

Everyone turned their heads after hearing a car pull up only to find the two love birds jumping out and joining the group.

Not even second’s later tall, like HUGE wolfs emerged from the treat lines slightly growling at those who stood before them.

“Well...Hello doggies” Nila said pushing up off the tree she was leaning on searching over every wolf in her eye sight.

The Pack took attention to the extra leech they have never seen before, especially Paul but he looked down at Carlisle before he could get a good look at her.

“They don’t trust us enough to be in their human forms” Edward said looking at his adoptive father.

“They came, that’s what matters... will you translate?” Carlisle asked as Edward gave a slight nod and stood in front of the wolfs.

Nila heard Bella say something to a rusty brown wolf but payed what ever it was no mind

“Welcome, Jasper as experience with newborns... He can teach us how to defeat them” he gently spoke.

“They wanna know how the newborns different from us” Edward stated.

“Their a great deal stronger then us because-”

“Their own human blood lingers in their tissues” Nila spoke out now coming closer and out of the tree lines.

Carlisle nodded at his friend before continuing.

“our kind is never more physically powerful then in our first several months of this life” he finished before stepping back letting Jasper take the lead.

“Carlisle’s right... That’s why their created” he said pacing.

“A new born army doesn’t need thousands like a human army... but no human army can stand against them”

The wolfs growled lowly as to say ‘we get it’

“the two most important things to remember are first... Never let them get their arms around you, they’ll crush you instantly. And second-” he said keeping eye contact with the wolfs.

“Never go for the obvious kill, they’ll be expecting that. and you. will. lose.... Nila, Emmet!” he shouted making the buff pale man and warm colored girl step forth.

Nila gracefully stood a few feet away from Emmet with a smirk.

“Don’t hold back steroids” she said in a teasing manner.

“Not in my nature she-devil” he responded in that same manner.

She stood still as Emmet charged at her small figure pushing her back through the dirt and lifting her, throwing her to ground only for her to land on she feet lightly.

Nila saw he was going to play dirty.. she going to show him she could play filthy.

smirking , She ran towards the man with force as he swung a punch toward her but she dodged it, she grabbed and twisted his arm making him turn in mid air before using her elbow to push his back to the ground, she won.

She pinned him.

“Never lose focus, sweet cakes” she said winking and turning back to go back to her spot in the tree’s but she felt eyes on her.

Nila turned around to search of eyes even close to looking at her, only to lock with Paul’s dusty grey ones.

She then felt her world stop as if only it was him and her in the field but she didn’t break eye contact with the wolf.

She saw a future with him, marriage , kids, love. A home.

He saw the same thing... felt the same way...

“One more thing...” Jasper’s voice spoke breaking them from their trance.

‘what the hell was that’ she thought but shook her head looking up to find Carlisle on the ground who was pinned by Edward.

That soon changed when Carlisle grabbed Edwards ankle bring him down as he now pinned Edward.

“never turn your back on your enemy” he said rolling his eyes.

As it was now Rose and Jasper’s turn to spare , Nila was now to deep in her thoughts to pay any attention , Paul the same.

Pictures of Nila’s light brown eyes flashed through his mind none stop, the vision’s of their future along with them which caught Jared’s attention.

‘oh dude... tell me you didn’t, did you?’ Jared thought.

‘shut up Jared’

‘OMG YOU DID!’

‘Will you guy’s focus, our life’s are kind of on the line here’ Paul heard Embry’s voice.

‘Paul imprinted on a leech Em, how am I suppose to focus if she’s flashing in my head. Kim is going to kill me-’

‘Enough’ Sam’s voice spoke.

‘Paul, we’ll talk later now all of you focus’

Training is now over and Nila sat on the steps of the Cullen’s home.

She just couldn’t get the dark grey out of her head.

What was it about him that pulled her to him and why was all she wanted to know I mean come on. she didn’t even know his human form.

“I wouldn’t stress it Ni maybe he just thought you were cute” a holly Alice said long side her.

she smiled gently before she spoke.

“Thanks pixie”

Mean while..

“you have to tell her Paul, she as a right to know” said a annoyed Sam beside Paul as the pack sat in Emily’s kitchen eating a lunch she made for a good luck before the newborn battle they have coming up.

Since training Paul wasn’t himself, almost as if he was missing a part of himself now that he was far from his imprint.

But he also felt disappointed in him self, why a vampire out of all things?

“Sam’s right... You cant stay far without hurting your self too” Jared said as he had a full mouth.

Embry and Quil agreeing with the usually dumb minded wolf.

“Mouth closed Jared” Emily Called out to the young boy, he said a quick sorry before he continued to wolf down his food.

No pun intended.

This angered the hot head Lahote, they don’t know what its like to imprint on your natural born enemy and then had the nerve to tell him to deal with it.

They wouldn’t know how to deal with it unless it happened to them.

“You don’t anything or even what your talking about” He said coldly.

Paul stood out his seat and stormed through back door leaving the conversation he wasn’t ready to have as he ran into the woods fazing mid sprint.

Flashes of the girl the cold one’s call ‘Nila’ going through his head was to much for him so he ran... growling and barking at anything in his path way.

The Battle

Nila Pov

It was now battle day, after two long nights of waiting, her mind still on the dark grey wolf in her mind, it was finally time to let her emotions go and kick some newborn ass.

Bella Stayed with Edward and Jacob far in the hills.

Jacob carried Bella to the camp out not to far from where the battle would be held to mask her scent so the newborns would be lead to the Cullen’s and Wolf’s plus Nila instead of Bella.

Nila kind of hoped the grey wolf would show as they were preparing for battle just so she can at least hold some conversation with him.

ask him what happened at training, why did she feel a pull to be near him all the time, why does her half death body ache when she thinks about her future with out him in it.

it was so much she needed to say.

“Stand tall, here they come” Jasper says as we lined up next to each other.

They listened as the growls grew louder, Foot steps coming closer ,and branches breaking.

Finally at least 20 pairs of blood red eyes came running from the tree lines and The 7 Vampires returning the act.

Jasper heads in first as he threw a power full punch breaking the newborns head like a piece of glass that just dropped.

Emmet using his buff figure to knock another of their feet then turning to twist one’s head right off their shoulders.

Every golden eyed vampire holding their own barely even noticing the pack jumping from the bolder and attacking a hand full of Newborn their self.

Esme grabbed a newborns foot to send then flying in the air for Carlisle to push the cold body down to the ground as his mate throws the monster to the wolfs.

Literally.

Nila was fighting to get the arms of a newborn from around her figure but couldn’t, Paul took notice to her struggle and jumped at the newborn holding her in one quick movement pulling his head off with his shark teeth.

They shared a quick glance before heading their own ways.

As they cleaned all of the newborn’s clean from the open field they were in everyone finally took a breather.

“Yeah never again, that bitch almost killed me” Nila said.

“Language”

“sorry”

“How long?” Edward said coming from nowhere will Bella on his left like a sea clam.

“A few minutes... maybe ten?” Alice said.

“the pack needs to leave , the Volturi won’t honor a truce with the werewolves”

A left over newborn jumped out and a white wolf with tan and grey in its fur attacked without thinking on anything.

“LEAH DONT!” Edward yelled.

The same dark grey wolf Nila as yet to talk to in human form jumped over the said wolf and latched on to the newborn then started to rumble.

Nila started to tense as the gray wolf started to lose his upper hand on the newborn.

The newborn got his arms around the grey wolf crushing his spine as Jasper said almost instantly, the wolf dropped to floor turning and whining in pain.

“NO!” Nila said running towards the monster who hurt the grey wolf fazing mid sprint and with one clean movement she torn the newborns head off.

“Paul... Hold on ok, Carlisle’s gonna take care of you” Edward said to the now human laying once where the grey wolf was.

There laid a tan man with the same tattoo as Jacob but buffer with arms in a x to try and help with the pain in his body but it was no use.

Nila’s wolf ran to the mans side ignoring his lack of clothes as she whined, a way of tell Carlisle to help him.

“his bones on the right, half them are shattered” Carlisle said.

5 boys and 1 girl soon came to Paul’s side in a hurry.

“Paul , You idiot! I Had it” Leah shouted.

“Leah!”

“we need to get him out of here , we’re not gonna want a fight with the Volturi” Edward said as Nila laid on her stomach resting her head gently on Paul’s shoulder ,whining.

“we’ll take him back to Billy’s” Sam said.

“I’ll be there as soon as I can”

The boys started to close in on Paul which Nila didn’t take to kindly , she missed what she was being said between the pack and Carlisle.

All she could focus on was Paul laying flat on the floor who she adored and felt the need to protect, moaning in pain.

Nila growled loudly as the 5 boy came in closer.

“Nila, they’re helping him. let them.”

She huffed before she started to whine again, hearing cries from Paul brought cries of her own.

“she can come... maybe she could help” Jacob suggest to Sam as they held Paul’s body up.

Sam nodded.

“They’re Coming!” Alice said which made Nila look to Carlisle as to ask could she.

He gave a warm smile before speaking.

“Go”

She hurried and follow the boys and Leah out of the woods.

Nila is now shifted back and everyone is at Billy’s.

Everyone’s out side as Paul screamed, it made her uneasy.

“What are they doing to him!” she asked turning to who she learned was Embry.

“Doc’s rebreaking his bones” she took a deep breath before she heard another one of Paul’s cries.

She slipped her finger into her hair and gripped it slightly.

Nila was freaking out and this wasn’t like her, she was pacing the grass as she tried to block out Paul’s screams.

“Paul Imprinted on you!” Jared rushed out trying to help the girl at least stay in one spot, all her walking and things were making him nervous.

“nice going jackass”

“really dude”

“Oh my gosh”

“this wasn’t the time...”

“someone had to say it!’

Nila zoned out their babbling as she focused on what she just heard, of course she has heard of imprinting but she just thought she had something on her face and her brain wanted to be over the top.

But instead he imprinted... and he didn’t tell her...

Nila felt her heart clench, was she not good enough to be is imprint? is that why he didn’t say anything?

The door to the little red house shack opened. Carlisle and Sam came out and shut the door.

Once again Carlisle said something and Nila didn’t pay it any mind.

“Nila... He’s asking for you”

She Looked up and shot through the door she walked down the small hall to find Paul on a bed in a pool of sweat and bandages.

He opened his eye’s half way to see her standing in the door way and muffled a laugh.

“so... your the hero wolf” he said in horse.

she gently smiled as she walked closer to the bed and sat on her knees.

“I- guess I am” she said looking up at him in his eyes.

They were beautiful to her, the way they shined even with no light on them.

“Look-” he said trying to sit up.

“Hey! no no no, stay still” she said starting to panic as she placed her small hands on his chest gently pushing him back down.

“ahh”

“Sorry- I’m so sorry- I-I should leave, I’m making things worst-” she said talking fast and getting up.

Paul caught her by her hand feeling the sparks on his skin as they touched.

In all honesty he didn’t want her to leave.

“Stay... please” he said making her slowly take her seat back on the floor, never taking his hand out of hers.

They sat in a peaceful silence before he spoke.

“I should have told you about the imprint... I’m sorry” he said looking at the side of her face but she turned her head to look him in his face.

“it’s okay, I get the whole Vampire werewolf hate thing but before you make up your mind-” she took a deep breath as she finally pulled her hand away from his now picking at her nails.

“I-I don’t think I have the will to stay away from you anymore” she said looking at her hands as he stared at her.

“Then don’t...” he said gently.

She look at his face to see if he was joking about what he said but she found no joking matter expression on his face.

She blushed.

“Lets start over” he said slowly sticking his hand out to shake hers which she gently shook.

“Hi, I’m Paul Lahote. I’m a werewolf, I imprinted on you and Thank you for saving my life ma’am” he said making her giggle.

“Hi, I’m Nila Livid. I’m a Hybrid, I kind of don’t mind-” She said smiling and falling into his eyes.

“and I’d do it all over again sir” she smiled making him smile and hold her hand tighter.

“Nice to meet you Nila”

HAPPY NEW YEARSSSS!❤

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girlfriendsofthegalaxy · 3 years

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tuesday again 4/20/21

nice

listening got some money, by bill wurtz. hello it’s a tuesday show

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reading fallow week, bc i don’t have anything more interesting to say than “hey here’s another six-issue comic book limited series with a cool concept but atrocious execution and an author/artist combo who have never interacted with a real human woman before”

watching Steel Dawn (1987, dir Hool, free on tubi rn) movies that are under two hours my beloved. this is the exact sort of schlocky eighties post-apoc movie my brain needed right now. utter nonsense. loved it. big cowboy-western water baron vibes on this one (literally just 1953′s Shane but post-apoc), with added bonus of lots of fucking around with scrap metal and machinery. mwah. catnip to me, personally.

don’t know that it’s a good film or achieves all its plot beats in a coherent manner but it was fun to turn my brain off for a little bit. the dialogue is. whoo boy. the dialogue is your typical eighties b-movie dialogue.

can’t find that article right now about how hugh jackman’s wolverine is the best example of the start of a profoundly unhealthy and unachieveable male body type in film, but action movie dudes pre-whenever the first wolverine came out distress me less- mr swayze in this film is a large buff man, but he doesn’t look dehydrated he just looks like a regular dude who does physical labor for a living. i just think it’s nice when dudes have a healthy cushioning layer of fat to protect their abdominal muscles and internal organs

the okay: it’s not rapey! the female lead, a widow, has her husband’s old army friend working her farm as her right hand man but he’s not weird and overprotective about it, the other dudes on the farm are respectful, everyone’s drinking their respect women juice. even the villain is angrier about her plans for water sharing more than the fact she’s a woman. also there are CARCASSES of SAILING SHIPS in the DESERT. because i am the person i am this made me raise my glass of gatorade above my head and hoot like a fuckin tusken raider

the weird: there’s a brief scene with some prostitutes who are getting ready for the night (i know) but they way they are chatting says they’re independent and respected which is cool. really wish we didn’t get that full frontal nudity weird voyeuristic scene tho

the bad: there is a japanese swordmaster (unsure how i feel about this trope in this context i need to do some more reading) anyway he’s the one cool non-white person with more than two speaking lines and dies in the first five minutes of the film. as with most post-apoc, this is a white settler colonialist fantasy about reclaiming the savage wasteland. the baddies’ gang is...i’m hesitant to say middle-eastern coded, bc their headdresses aren’t quite like a shemagh or a keffiyeh, but i am. concerned.

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playing my post-work routine is now dinnerdishescallsibling and then collapse and play stardew valley while listening to podcasts. we’re now in winter 2 and i am mildly cranky bc i have not Perfectly Optimized this fun game for funsies and i can’t finish the community center until summer (depending on if the cart and/or krobus are randomly selling the correct three fish and one fiddlehead fern and also three apples) bc again i do not feel like the fishing minigame is the most enjoyable aspect of the game for me. HOWEVER. i am building a stable. stay tuned

making did not take a better pic before i sent it off, but here’s one of the patches in the trio i’m making for my sister’s birthday. i have got to figure out a easier way to make patches that also looks nice but idk if it’s possible without buying a serger, which i do not have room for in this apartment. maybe if i get iron-on backing that’ll stabilize the edges enough? the issue is that coarsely woven aida cloth doesn’t really want to cooperate even when drenched in fraychek, the duct tape of the sewing world.

#tuesday again #tuesday again no problem #six minutes early you're welcome everybody

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kda-chat · 4 years

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Kai’Siv Hercules Inspired AU

Long Post Warning! Inspired by Disney’s Heracles, changed the Greek mythology to Egyptian mythology. Because of that, there are slight variations compared to the original story. Just know this is just a simple, general AU post and I hope you enjoy! :)

XXX

Shai, God of Fate and Destiny, foretold a prophecy: Set, God of the Desert, Storms, and Evil, will one day overthrow Anubis, God of Funerals, Mummification, and the Afterlife and take over Duat- the Realm of the Dead. With Anubis gone, this leaves Osiris, Lord of the Underworld, and Set's brother, vulnerable to overthrow. The downfall of Anubis and Osiris will destroy the Mortal Realm, crumbling Egypt to the ground. However, a mortal champion, chosen by Anubis, will rise to stop Set. No matter what, this champion will be successful.

To prevent the second half of the prophecy from coming true, Set sent ruthless sandstorms around temples that worshiped Anubis, depriving him of followers. For many years, Anubis' temples were barren and empty, loss of faith.

One day, a poor woman, on the verge of death, finds herself in the footsteps of Anubis' temple, carrying a baby. She begs the deity to save her child's life before succumbing to death. Anubis, knowing the prophecy is now set, takes in the baby, and names her Sivir. Gifting her with godlike strength, he requests aid from Ra, God of the Sun. Ra sends down his demi god champion, Azir, to help.

Azir is Sivir's ancestor [Azir was human at one point, thousands of years ago], thus why he was chosen to become her parental figure, taking on a human disguise. His role is to guide Sivir and raise her in the Mortal Realm, to learn and understand about humanity. However, Sivir grew up isolated and distrustful. The other children and parents were fearful of Sivir's inhuman strength and treated her like an outcast. Worried, Azir then took in another child named Taliyah from an exiled village that was destroyed by bandits. Thus, Sivir and Taliyah got along and became close friends. Taliyah didn't mind Sivir's strength and saw her as an older sister that protected her.

One day, Azir reveals Sivir's destiny to her, after she had been questioning her existence and role in this world. He tells her to visit the Temple of Anubis, who will then prepare her for her fight against Set.

Sivir travels to the Temple of Anubis and meets Anubis himself. He tells her about her mother, how she came to him, and now what she needs to do. Anubis sends his champions down to Earth, Nasus and Renekton, to train Sivir. Nasus will teach her how to use her mind in the face of battle, using strategy, plans, and tactics to win. Renekton will teach Sivir about bravery and perseverance, how to use her godlike strength to win. The two brothers have different views of strength and often fight about it. [Insert Sivir's workout montage and getting buff.]

Meanwhile, Set has found out about Sivir. Using spies to observe the young woman, he noticed her attraction towards women. So Set chooses Kai'sa to hopefully "slow down" Sivir's progress and kill her.

Kai'sa is a mortal girl, a victim of the Void- an empty space that is filled with gruesome monsters. Kai'sa once loved another woman [I guess this can be Cassiopeia but I'll leave it blank]. When her lover was trapped in the Void, Kai'sa rushed in to save her but was betrayed by the lover and left in the Void for many years. This made Kai'sa distrustful and cynical towards romance. The only thing that kept her sanity in the Void was her need to survive for her father, Kassadin, who thought she was dead.

Set makes a deal with Kai'sa. He will release Kai'sa from the Void, and return her to her father if she seduces Sivir and kills her. Kai'sa takes the deal.

At this point, Sivir has grown stronger and wiser under Nasus and Renekton's guidance. She has conquered different trials to test her abilities, gaining respect and honor from the people that ostracized her. She was now a hero in their eyes.

In an "accident" at the river, Sivir rescues Kai'sa and falls deeply in love. Kai'sa was unlike any other girl that Sivir fancied, her beauty was mesmerizing to gaze at. And so, for a while, Sivir took time out of her training to pursue Kai'sa [which pissed Nasus and Renekton off, who were suspicious of Kai'sa]. She slowly realized that this wasn't an "I want your body" type of love, it was an "I want you to be my life partner" type of love. During this, Kai'sa plays along to get Sivir's affections, while trying to get her killed. But each time, Sivir cunningly survives [not knowing it's Kai'sa's doing] and it starts to impress the young Void woman.

But as Kai'sa learned more about Sivir, she started seeing who Sivir really was. This strong woman was a huge softy that just wanted to be liked and accepted. Sivir admitted at being resentful of humanity for rejecting her but has grown to forgive them. She spoke fondly of Taliyah and her parental figure, Azir. Sivir was a well-rounded individual that had a big heart. Kai'sa started seeing how Sivir was the complete opposite of her former lover, and slowly fell in love. [Insert famous "I Won't Say I'm in Love" scene with Ahri, Akali, and Evelynn as the muses]

At first, Set is concerned that Kai'sa has fallen for Sivir, but then realizes that Kai'sa was now Sivir's weakness. During a confrontation where Kai'sa declares that she won't hurt Sivir anymore, even at the cost of losing her freedom from the Void and seeing her father again, Set captures her and sets a trap. He lures Sivir in to save Kai'sa, bargaining with her: If she gives up all of her strength and powers for twenty-four hours, she can have Kai'sa. Sivir makes Set promise that Kai’sa will not get hurt. He agrees to the deal [Kai'sa is gagged and unable to talk back]. Sivir accepts the deal because she cares for Kai'sa that much. Once the bargain was made, Set reveals that Kai'sa worked for him and now can go after his brother and take over Duat without fearing for Sivir.

Lost, broken, betrayed, Sivir is useless to fight against the onslaught of monsters that are now fighting in Duat. Kai'sa is equally as guilty, realizing that she was no different from her former lover. However, she still wanted to help Sivir and rushes to Nasus and Renekton, persuading them to go back to Sivir to help her. They do, returning to Sivir and reminding her that pure strength isn't just muscle but it's also the mind and the heart, bravery and intellect. In her renewed confidence, Sivir is able to take down a chimera. In the process, however, Kai'sa is brutally injured while trying to protect Sivir- breaking the promise Set said about letting Kai'sa be safe. This allows Sivir to regain her powers but at the cost of Kai'sa's life. When questioned why she tried to save Sivir, Kai'sa confesses her love for her.

Rushing to come back to Kai'sa, Sivir succeeds in stopping Set from his plans. However, when she comes back, Kai'sa has died from her injuries. Anubis offers Sivir to search for Kai'sa's soul in Duat, in an area where souls must triumph challenges before the "Weighing of the Heart" test. Anubis warns that Sivir might not return from Duat because she is still technically a mortal and can get lost in this area of Duat forever. Sivir does not hesitate to search for Kai'sa. She overcomes the challenges that the dead has to maneuver, searching for Kai'sa's soul. She finds Kai'sa alone, taunted by the betrayal of her former lover, which halts her journey to the "Weighting of the Heart" test.

Kai'sa, looks up to see Sivir has found her, but she is hesitant because the idea of a possible betrayal is taunting her. Sivir assures her that she will never let go of her hand and promises to return her to Kassadin, guiding her way back to the Mortal Realm. As they make their way back, Kai'sa is assured that she can fully trust Sivir and apologizes profusely for hurting Sivir earlier.

They make it back, safe and sound. The balance is maintained, the prophecy fulfilled. Anubis grants Sivir to be a demi-god like Azir but that meant leaving Kai'sa behind because she is still a mortal. Kai'sa assures Sivir that she will be fine, she thinks Sivir deserves this high honor. But Sivir rejects Anubis' offer and chooses to stay with Kai'sa, reminding her that she promised to return her to her father.

In the end, Azir returns to Ra, and tells Sivir that he will greatly miss her- his daughter. Renekton and Nasus say their goodbyes, crying and moping while trying to act cool. Sivir returns to her hometown with Kai'sa, letting her meet Taliyah, before embarking to find Kassadin. Once they find Kassadin, reuniting father and daughter, the two of them live happily ever after.

XXX

I hope you enjoyed. Yes, Akali, Ahri, and Evelynn don’t have a big appearance in this one but let Kai’siv have their moment since I left them out in the other AUs. I hope you enjoyed because it was fun to imagine! Now I’ve done all three couples, Akalynn- Beauty and the Beast AU, BladeMaven - Little Mermaid AU, and now Kai’Siv. :) Special thanks to Kaya for inspiring me.

#and perhaps ill do more #but for now #i hope you enjoy #i know it's not a fanfiction but its fun to push out these ideas i have #kai'siv #kai'sa #sivir #kda #kda kai'sa #pizza delivery sivir #my headcannons #my fanfictions #my au #like #follow #reblog

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moodysnowflake · 4 years

Text

Hello there!

Warning guys, nasty SPOILERS ahead, both of FFVII (+ Remake) and FFVII Crisis Core.

The severity of spoilers is arguable, it depends on the level of involvement you have or you got in the series, so please be aware that what you're stepping onto might be a wildflower lawn as much as a war minefield.

I saw, read and heard a lot of people complaining about Cloud's dancing scene/minigame, grumbling about how:

1. Stupid it was;

2. Degrading it has been;

3. Zack would have been disappointed.

Let's take it in strides, shall we?

1. Stupid? I'd rather say silly, more than stupid. Stupid means doing something that you've no idea how/why you're doing. FFVII never made that a mystery: there was a goofy vibe in the original too, and that was on purpose. You couldn't handle the story otherwise, it would just have been a mess of violence, death, tears and blood. Light moods are needed for you to recuperate, recharge batteries and balance. Otherwise, we all would've ended up like Sephiroth.

Character perspective wise, Cloud might not have understood from the beginning (as much as I love him to the bottom of my essence, he's not the sharpest knife in the drawer - that's also why Sephiroth can do what the fluff he wants) what the hell Aerith roped him into, but when he gets the idea he accepts it (in his very Cloud way) and faces it with one of the most determined look he has ever sported. He's willing to let himself be dragged on and about the stage by Andrea, because he knows this is for Tifa, so it doesn't matter if he has to shake is ass in front of a bunch of strangers. He never really cared about his reputation since Crisis Core; he doesn't care about what people think, he's doing it for the woman he loves (shut your trap, he loves her as much as she loves him, he just needs time to untangle himself from his nightmares - and someone smacking him on the head really hard).

Secondly, player perspective wise, is it really such a stupid section? How many did manage to get a perfect score on the very first try? Camera speed, moves and angles pulled some interesting stunts, didn't they? Tricking your depth perception, together with the lights going bananas. Even if they weren't; everything has been coordinated and perfectly synced with the music. If you'd refrained for two seconds from blabbering insults you would have noticed that you could've actually used lights as another cue to help you sync, with the music and Cloud's movements. It's called peripheral vision, you need to expand your focus as much as you can and split it both on the background and the forefront. That gives your brain the capacity to better throw information at you so you can react faster, 'cause you're actively trying to remain perceptive of your surroundings too. Just like in battles.

If that shooting dynamic would have been present during battle, nobody would have survived, not even a doomrat.

2. Talking about degrading. Did Cloud strip naked? Did he have to put on a honeybee outfit? As much as he was very uncomfortable, Andrea (a.k.a. the game) pushed him only up to the limit that still felt secure enough and over which it could have been really perceived as abusive. Andrea could have done that and Cloud would still have obliged (because Tifa) but his objective was not humiliating him. He wanted to play with the dangerous SOLDIER, over which he, paradoxically, even for a tiny bit, had the power and control. Still, he didn't overdo nor overuse it (that is some good representation of a BDSM Dom, btw).

Moreover... I mean... Did you really look at him? Those were not exactly noobs moves, he nailed that too (but that's something I'll talk about next).

About the dresses: are you seriously complaining about them? I admit that the black/white one is not exactly the best (but it's your fault for ditching all Wall Market's quest... you had it coming), and I prefer the blue corset one over the lilac/black silk.

Point is: you have to sneak a guy who's built like a fucking BRICK WALL into Corneo's audition. How in the ever-loving hell are you supposed to do it? The only things playing in Cloud's favor are his facial features and his height: he's the smoothest skin I've ever seen, light jaws and is compact enough not to stand out too much among average-height girls, but that's it. He has shoulders and muscles for days. You have to cover him as much as you can, and how would you do that, if not with a broad gown, puff-sleeves, and a corset? If you're wondering about the chocker/high neck+thick necklace: it covers the Adam's apple, genius... And all the frilly, shiny laces of the lilac dress and the extensions are needed to divert the attention from his neck, clavicles and forearms, otherwise, you'll notice the buff.

That's why he had to look like a Victorian maiden.

Putting him in a catsuit, with latex or leather stretching over every inch of skin, or a sundress, with arms and legs on display... That would have been a bad idea.

Andrea is talking about not being afraid, and that's an awesome message: if you feel comfortable and beautiful, why not doing it? If you're happy, do it. It's not your problem if other people are insecure about themselves and try to pick on you because they're afraid and, most of all, jealous of your confidence, identity, and fortitude. They're just disrespectful and sad, and you should avoid them like the plague.

And again, Cloud doesn't seem that much fazed about it. I think he's more annoyed than anything; having to move in that huge-ass skirt, squeezed in a corset which is not letting you breathe and turn around would make everyone who's not used to it lose their shit. Women or men, regardless, it's a pain either way, especially if you're a fighter and need to move freely. Also, if you notice, the heels he's put in are not that much higher than his combat boots... Sure, they're thinner, but that's why he's not wobbling like a newborn calf. Did you see him swaying through the streets? That was some awesome heel-walking.

What ended me was how he was moving after he woke up. Have you seen how completely ungraceful he is, and at the same time fluidly stands to check on Aerith and doesn't trip over his own feet? In a dress like that, being that agile is shamefully amazing. Then, he swings like he's in the SOLDIER uniform, spine blocked because of the corset, moving his center of gravity too much because of too broad steps, awkwardly bobbing, switching too much weight from feet to feet, getting his stance rigid. That's precious. And hilarious af.

He has to held still as much as he can to try and convey the feeling of being scared, but we know he's just trying really hard not to wreak havoc in the audition room and slaughter everyone.

(Despise lighting, which being warm oriented would have mingled with the blue of his irises and shift them to green, I still believe that in that scene his eyes were going mako. In some millisecond-split moments, they seem to really flash out. That's hella relatable: you're using all your self-control not to cut open the scumbag who's lusting and sniffing and drooling and being awful to your friends. Plus, you're being groped and talked down too? The only thing you can do is look, and boy does he Glare™

(Cloud is not afraid/disgusted of other men touching him, but people seem to forget it. He just doesn't want Corneo to touch him. He doesn't move when Andrea touches his lips nor react when he swings him around in the dress, he doesn't move when Biggs pats him on the head on the pillar (I bet he would give everything to have Zack do that again, just one more time...dammit [I know what happens in the final cutscene of the Remake, but the post below this one explains why I think this]), he doesn't pull away when he grabs his hands, and not only he grabs it back, but grasps with the other one too. [Captain Levi vibes, anyone?])

He didn't have control over his eyes and I firmly think he didn't even intend to; he let them glow on purpose, just because that was the only thing he could unleash and nobody would have noticed.)

Cloud dancing is not stupid, nor offensive. Cloud is a loyal, caring friend, who doesn't have prejudices and is comfortable (as much as he can be) with his sexuality and identity that he's not questioning it nor getting scared (and violent) at the situation.

Do I have to dance and dress like a woman to help my girl? If it's the best way, so be it. She needs my help, I'm not gonna let her down. Gonna be a pain in the ass to fight, but I'll manage. I'm not that insecure of myself that a dress is going to make me have an existential crisis.

If you're a man or a male, and your friend/lover/person you cherish would ever be in a life-threatening situation (and this is, 'cause if they were on their own, they would have died), and the only option would be for you to dance and put on a dress to save them, but you refuse because you have to dance and it's a dress... Just a fucking dress... Well... You're not that decent of a friend, nor human being...

3. So. About Zack. If you think he would've been disappointed/disgusted... Are we talking about the same character? 'Cause I think we're not.

Zack Fair, SOLDIER 1st class (previously 2nd), 6 foot and a ladder, black hair, blue eyes, scar on his left jaw. Droll af?

Just because he's a legend, a powerful, passionate and strong-willed person, doesn't mean he couldn't be a quirky dumbass.

The first line said to him in Crisis Core is "Get serious" by Angeal... Angeal who described him to his mother as a PUPPY.

The same guy who jostled his mentor, a fucking SOLDIER 1st class, in front of their boss, when he knew he recommended him.

The same guy who tried to get Aerith on a date after 5 minutes.

The one who grabs a parasol to fight troopers without breaking a sweat.

The one who faked defeat by sixth-grade-Yuffie in Wutai.

The one who dances with the Cactua he summons?

When Angeal discusses the plan and tells him to charge the front gate of Wutai on the first game mission, he's jumping like an over-excited dog.

And, most importantly, the only living being who actually managed to:

- Make Sephiroth care (after Hollander with implanted Jenova cells escapes, he tells Zack Genesis’ copies had been seen in the slums... And with that frigging Knowing™ look, and a smirk, he tells him "Permission to return... Granted", Seph's gentlemanly way to say 'I know you have a girlfriend down there, you should go check on her':

Then Sephiroth says goodbye first

And fucking smiles (Zack wasn’t able to see it ‘cause he was already walking away)

- Yell at him over the phone and live;

- Pull a GENUINE laugh out of him. When they're trying to locate Angeal and Genesis, Sephiroth calls him. The conversation goes as:

S:"You and I are gonna find them [Gen & Angie] before they [Shinra] do, and..."

Z:'And WHAT?!?!' *angry bark, to which Sephirot pulls the phone away*

S:"...Fail to eliminate them"

Z:'For real?!'

S:"[AMUSED HUFF] Yes, for real" *playful mocking of Zack's words*

Okay, that was a huff, BUT STILL... Not even Sephiroth (when he was still a human being...because yes, he was, and a pretty decent one too) was immune to his Puppy Dog Energy. Look. At. That. Smile.

So this is what I think.

The only thing Zack would be disappointed about would've been Cloud not dancing enough.

Heck, he would've jumped on the stage as soon as given the signal and dragged Cloud along, yelling in his face to be heard over the music "This is gonna be great! Let's show them what a SOLDIER can do! We're gonna put all these cute bees to shame!" ᕕ(ᐛ)ᕗ

Then again... If Zack would've been there...if we think about it, a part of Zack was there.

During his childhood and infantry training, I seriously doubt Cloud had any occasion to dance or learn how to do it.

Plus, he couldn't have done it during his 4-years mako-comatose state.

This doesn't leave that many options.

It is very likely that, like his fighting ability, his dancing moves were coming from Zack's memories too.

In a way, we can say that Zack, in the end, was there on stage with him.

Gosh, I'm gonna cry so much... ಥ_ಥ

#ffvii remake #ffvii theories #cloud strife #honeybee inn #cloud dancer #zack fair #me gongaga #ffvii crisis core #ffvii compilation

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harlot-of-oblivion · 4 years

Text

🤠OC Questionnaire: Beretta🤠

a.k.a. Cowgirl Vampire Reader from the Tales of Miss Fortune series

Full name

Blythe Bale

Preferred name/nickname

Beretta

Generally referred to as

BB, Miss Fortune

Appearance

FACECLAIM: Here’s a portrait I made using Artbreeder:

(but @i-write-fanfics-to-procrastinate photoshopped her green eye!)

SEX: Female.

HEIGHT: 5’7

WEIGHT: A little hefty due to all the muscle.

BUILD: Toned and muscular thanks to years of fighting wars and winning battles.

HAIR: Long, course, and auburn brown. Her hair comes down past her shoulders. She usually wears it down but sometimes has it in a loose braid with her ever present gambler hat on her head.

SKIN: Brown. Smooth and hard but cool to the touch ever since her Embrace.

EYES: She has heterochromia iridis: her left is russet brown while her right eye is forest green. They always seem to sparkle with mischief and her green eye, also known as her “evil eye”, glows whenever the Beast stirs inside her. Short black eyelashes.

MOUTH: Small mouth with plump lips. Slightly crooked teeth that are perfectly white teeth with very prominent canines that can retract when not feeding.

NOSE: Small and rounded with a wide bridge and small nostrils.

HANDS: Small hands with medium nails that can extend into razor sharp claws at will. They used to be rough with callouses before her Embrace, but now they’re incredibly smooth and just a little soft.

FEET: Small with wide insoles and short toes. She doesn’t trim her toenails since they’ll just grow back the next night.

SCARS: She had a scar across her nose when she was alive, but it quickly healed and faded away after her Embrace.

CLOTHES: Her entire wardrobe just screams cowgirl: boot cut jeans, tons of Western style shirts, large belt buckle, long leather jackets, and a few gambler hats.

OTHER FEATURES: She has vampiric fangs and just an overall air of otherworldliness that everyone notices on a subconscious level.

OTHER NOTABLE FEATURES: To be determined.

Speech

VOICECLAIM: To be determined.

ACCENT: She speaks with a very thick Southern drawl.

VERBAL TICS: She has a tendency to use “tsk” a lot when she’s annoyed.

LANGUAGE: She’s fluent in English, Spanish, Gaelic, French, German, Russian, Japanese, and Vietnamese along with some dead languages her Dame taught her.

ARTICULATION: She’s not the most eloquent when it comes to explaining things clearly, and she tends to go on storytelling tangents sometimes.

EDUCATION: She doesn’t use any long and fancy words since it’s more fun to cram a lot of words when she’s running her mouth off.

LAUGHTER: She has two types of laughter: joyful howling and malicious cackling. Her joyful laugh is loud and proud; it’s what you’re most likely to hear if you stay on her good side. Her malicious cackling sounds like death itself; only those who’ve earned her scorn hear its chilling timbre.

GRUMP: Not very often except for when she’s annoyed, letting out a few agitated hisses when she’s hungry.

BREATHING: She’ll let out the occasional humph and tends to sniff the air whenever she’s tracking by scent despite not needing to breathe.

Mannerisms

FACE: She has a very expressive face but knows how to hide her true feelings behind a disarming grin.

HANDS: She gestures a lot with her hands, especially when she’s welding guns since that always catches people off guard.

LEGS/FEET: She taps her feet and jiggles her leg as if she’s listening to some long forgotten song in her head.

EMOTIONAL OUTBURSTS: She’s prone to emotional outbursts whenever she’s on the verge of hunger or enters a fear frenzy. Lots of hissing, growling, and deathly screeching whenever this happens. But she also yips, yells, and yowls along with whatever mood strikes her at that moment.

HABITS: She randomly bursts into song whenever the mood strikes her, and she fiddles with her guns and whittling knife when she’s occupied with her thoughts. She also tips her hat a lot whenever she introduces herself or just as a general gesture of good will.

POSTURE: She tends to slump over a bit while standing, but she'll stand straight and steady whenever she’s shooting her guns.

WALKING POSTURE: She has a very distinctive swagger to her step that exudes casual confidence.

SITTING POSTURE: She crosses her legs and slouches in her seat.

PERSONAL SPACE: She doesn’t have much of a personal bubble, but has no problem letting someone know they’re not welcome within her space. She respects other people’s personal spaces, but has no problems getting into someone’s face when threatened.

SPACIAL AWARENESS: Her keen vampiric senses pick up even the most miniscule details, so she’s rarely taken by surprise.

OTHER: She likes to share very old Western sayings whenever the mood strikes her.

Health

DIET: Blood...mostly human blood, but she’s acquired a taste for demonic hybrid blood recently. She refuses to drink blood from the elderly, children, mages, and abhorrent mortals.

SLEEP: She doesn’t really sleep anymore...more like falling into a state of repose before the first crack of dawn. And she simply animates as soon as the sun dips below the horizon. She doesn’t have dreams while in this state per se; memories of past death and misfortune flash before her eyes repeatedly in the form of dreams.

EXERCISE: Not much since her muscles will never develop further than what they were when she died. And she can just buff herself with her blood if she needs a boost in strength and speed.

ACTIVITY: She’s a hard worker but tends to laze around until the very last second before getting to work. She only pushes herself past exhaustion if the task is of great importance.

CLEANLINESS: She bathes regularly, especially after certain bloody activities. She prefers a quick shower over soaking in the bath.

ODOUR: She faintly smells of leather, desert rose, and freshly dug earth.

MEDICINAL DRUGS: No.

NARCOTICS: No.

ADDICTIONS: Besides blood and death? No.

ILLNESS: Besides being a vampire? No.

INJURIES: No.

PARASITES: No.

OTHER: She must have blood every day or else risk succumbing to a hunger frenzy. In this state, she doesn’t care about keeping a low profile and she’ll feed without much thought about anyone’s safety. The only way to bring her out of this state is either waiting it out until she’s well fed, knocking her unconscious, or bestowing Final Death.

Personal

INTROVERT/EXTROVERT: Oh she’s an extrovert through and through! She doesn’t go out of her way to go unnoticed unlike most of her kind; the cowboy boots and gambler hat stay on no matter what! Loud and proud is her personal motto and anyone nearby will hear and see that for themselves.

OPTIMIST/PESSIMIST: She’s a little bit of both; she always hopes for the best but knows that misfortune rears its ugly from time to time.

GENDER: Female.

SEXUALITY: She’s attracted to both men and women so long as they’re outgoing and have a good sense of humor. She prefers women more often than not but she’s had a few relationships with men in the past. And she’s not adverse to other supernatural beings even if it’s taboo within vampire society. She despises anyone who uses magic to manipulate others and will most likely dispose of them before they inflict even more suffering upon the world.

ROMANTIC: She’s not one for romance but won’t shy away from it either. And she enjoys romantic gestures though she’d never admit it out loud. She was married once before when she was alive but doesn’t plan on remarrying in her new life...and more children are off the table since she’s clinically dead.

MEMORY: She has a pretty good and very accurate memory, but the memories of her mortal life are starting to get a little fuzzy.

PLANNING: She’s more of a “act now, think later” kind of gal.

PENSIVE: She pretends to not brood over the past, but she’s guilty of reminiscing over old trials and tribulations that lead her to live such a dark life.

INTUITION: She’s honed her intuition over the years but it’s eerily accurate when death and misfortune are involved.

PROBLEM SOLVING: If they can be solved by shooting them to death then sure! But she’s not above asking for help if that doesn’t work.

GOALS: Her main goal in life is following death wherever it takes her and ridding the world of mages, witches, warlocks, and all other wielders of magic. Her short term goals are taking it easy in between and finding more customizations for her guns, Misery and Woe.

INSECURITIES: She doesn't have many insecurities...constantly being the bearer of misfortune takes a toll on her sometimes. But she hides it very well under her mischievous smirks and rowdy posturing. She rarely reveals her true nature unless forced since most mortals do not take very kindly to vampires.

ACHIEVEMENTS: She’s proud of her outlaw exploits as Miss Fortune and being well traveled even if it’s because her curse demands to dwell near copious amounts of death.

ANXIETY: Any notion of anyone figuring out her true nature. Fire and holy places make her really anxious. She’s also not fond of seeing children in distress.

OVERWHELMED: Not feeding enough causes a lot of stress.

SELF-HELP: She doesn’t until it becomes a nuisance. Then, she just tries to deal with it as quickly as possible.

COMFORTS: Hanging out at a bar with good music will always make her happy...even better with the right company to keep her entertained. She also likes to whittle whenever she needs peace and quiet.

BAD HABITS: Her constant paranoia is kind of like a bad habit.

PHILOSOPHY: She abandoned all her previous beliefs after her death, but she wasn’t really religious to begin with. She does pay proper respect to the Dark Mother of all Lillum whenever possible though.

TRIGGERS: Fire and terrified screams of children.

The Past

PARENTS/GUARDIANS: She had a very good relationship with her parents growing up; still has fond memories of helping her Ma with the chores and tending the horses with her Pa. Her relationship with the woman who Embraced her is not as warm though; very austere and aloof but she does show her caring side on rare occasions.

SCHOOL: She was homeschooled at her father’s ranch and she was a very bright kid.

ADOLESCENCE: It was difficult since her mother died before she could teach her about the changes in her body. And her father tried his best but he usually just let her figure it out on her own.

LEAVING HOME: She didn’t leave home until her father’s death. It was heartbreaking since she had to sell the ranch in order to provide for her daughter.

FURTHER EDUCATION: A higher education wasn’t available due to her social status, but she definitely broadened her horizons soon after her death.

FIRST JOB: Her first job was cooking and cleaning at local inns and bars. It wasn’t the best job nor was it as rewarding as her work on the ranch, but it paid for the roof over her head and food on her table while raising her daughter.

LIFE EVENTS: The birth of her daughter was one of the happiest moments of her life. She was forcefully recruited as a spy by a mage, which led to her eventual Embrace as a vampire. And being drawn to the Russian Revolution led to saving and Embracing a young woman.

WORST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: Her daughter was on the brink of death due to the meddling of a mage.

BEST DAY OF THEIR LIFE: She made a blood bond with her rowdy cowboy.

LESSONS: Those who wield magic bring nothing but trouble and should be dealt with immediately. Sometimes you get and sometimes you get got. If it doesn’t seem worth the effort then it probably isn’t.

LOOKING BACK: If she could replay her life and do something different, she would try her damnedest to keep her father’s ranch and raise her daughter in peace away from another man’s war.

Relationships

FAMILY: The only family she had growing up was her Ma and Pa. They made a living for themselves on her father’s ranch raising horses and tending to their own modest farm. She would’ve been an older sister but her mother and baby brother both died during childbirth.

Her Dame, the woman who Embraced her, is more like a strict tutor than a mother but that suits her fine. She’s much closer with her older “sister” and they traveled together often until going their separate ways. And she’s also close with her own “daughter” even though they bicker a lot about the dumbest things.

FRIENDSHIPS: It’s hard for her to keep many friends since she travels a lot but she doesn’t mind the occasional company from time to time. Anyone who doesn’t take life too seriously and can let loose is okay in her books. She can’t call anyone who falls under one of the codes of her clan a friend.

FRIENDS IN NEED: She lends them an ear every now and then but she usually distracts them with a good time drinking at the closet bar. She’ll sometimes offer some strange old sayings that sound like sage advice but otherwise will just let them vent before encouraging them to just drop their worries at the door while they drink their worries away.

NEEDING A FRIEND: She tends to deal with her problems on her own since she doesn’t have any close friends to confide in. The few friends she has made do worry about her often though but her carefree attitude convinces them to not pry into her private affairs.

ANNOYANCES: She usually deflects from arguments and disagreements with loud and rowdy humor.

ROMANCE: She lays it on thick with the flirting until one of them makes the first move. She looks for someone with good looks and wicked sense of humor...bonus if they tell great tales about their crazy exploits.

MARITAL PROBLEMS: She tried to be open about any problems with her lover but sometimes the old habit of deflecting with humor crops up. But a good ol’ fashioned fight (depends on her mood if it's verbal or physical) or a few rounds in the bedroom usually loosens her tongue.

ADVERSARIES: Anyone who takes themselves way too seriously.

ENEMIES: Anyone who embodies the very reason why her clan exists is instantly her enemy by default.

STRANGERS: She’s respectful enough to strangers but has no problem telling them to back off if they step on her toes too much.

FUN STUFF: She likes to hangout at bars even though she can’t drink anymore. She also likes to go horseback riding in the middle of the night but doesn’t mind joyriding on a motorcycle either.

DATING: It doesn’t matter what they’re doing so long as she’s with her lover. She still likes to be wined and dined too...just in a more vampiric sense now.

BEST FRIEND: Her crow could be counted as her best friend...mostly because she doesn’t have any real friends.

LOVE: Dante, the Legendary Devil Hunter who somehow wrangled her undead heart.

WORST ENEMY: There currently isn’t anyone who she considers her worst enemy...yet.

RESPECT: Depends on the person. She had no respect for anyone who breaks the codes of her clan and shows no mercy when dealing with them.

Interactions

MINGLING: She’s quite the mingler and gets along well with others.

COMFORT LEVELS: She’s great at striking up random conversations among strangers and friends. And she has no problem shooing them away with a harsh glare if they make her uncomfortable.

PHYSICAL: She can be a little touchy-feely from time to time, usually in the form of pats on the back or shoulder. She only shares hugs with people she sees as a good friend.

GROUPS: She’s comfortable hanging out in a big group since there’s a greater chance for some rowdy fun.

OPENNESS: She’s open to an extent...she won’t talk about anything personal with others unless they prove to be trustworthy.

GENEROSITY: She usually makes her gifts and only buys treats if she couldn’t find a good piece of wood for whittling. She’d only lend money to a friend if she trusts them to not waste it. And she gets excited when someone buys gifts for her but it always comes with a reminder that they really don’t have to waste their hard earned money on a lazy bitch like her.

JEALOUSY: She’s usually not the jealous type but her dark nature rears its head and sometimes...and a jealous vampire is very dangerous. She usually deals with it by just plain ignoring it while going for a ride in the night.

TEMPER: She can be patient up to a point before getting worked up when it starts to grate on her nerves.

EMPATHY: She’s able to empathize with another person’s feelings since some of her vampiric abilities allows her to read their emotional state.

AFFECTION: She shows affection by giving one of whittled woodworks with all the charming compliments. She also likes to snuggle and nuzzle their neck with a soft purr if they're really close.

DISTASTE: She’ll outright tell someone she dislikes them to their face. She’s been known to stare at them while using her Evil Eye if she REALLY doesn’t like them.

ETIQUETTE: She can be very polite in social situations so long as everyone else plays nice, but she has no problem being rude if someone insults her.

RESPONSIBILITY: She’ll begrudgingly admit when she’s wrong and will try to correct it to the best of her abilities.

SELF ESTEEM: She sticks up for herself no matter who’s giving her a hard time. Her Dame taught her to never appear weak in the eyes of men since they always seek to tear down strong women.

CONFIDENCE: She doesn’t give a damn what others think of her.

HONESTY: She always speaks her mind honestly even if it might upset someone.

LEADER OR FOLLOWER: She’s more of a lone wanderer but has no problem slipping into either roll when the situation calls for it

PARTY TRICKS: She’s real quick with her guns, loves to whittle wood into a work of art in no time flat, and she can also sing surprisingly well.

PRAISE: She loves receiving compliments.

FAILURES: Her lazy and laid back attitude as well as her boisterous hollering can be a tad annoying to some people.

CRITICISM: She can take criticism so long as it’s helpful with just a little bit of back talk.

INSULTS: It depends on who’s insulting her. She usually just laughs it off before biting back with some of her own insults with her venomous stare.

EMBARRASSMENT: She’s not easily embarrassed but if it does happen, she’ll straight up hide her face with the brim of her gambler hat before making a quick exit.

FLIRTING: She can be real flirty for two reasons: scoring a meal or genuine attraction.

ATTENTION SPAN: She has great concentration and can hold it for an exorbitant amount of time so long as she’s fed beforehand.

SITUATIONS: Some of her vampiric abilities can deal with difficult social situations, but she’d rather just talk it out if possible.

Life

CAREER: She's a wandering mercenary who specializes in neutralizing mages and witches. It’s a well paying job with high risks but she derives joy from it.

PROMOTION: She’s quite happy with her current position.

BOSS: She’s her own boss.

DUTY: She’s a specialized tracker who shoots down bitches.

TECH: She’s adequate at using modern technology but prefers to not rely on it too much.

POLITICS: Not very political unless a mage is involved...then she’ll fucking kill them.

COMBAT SKILLS: She’s an expert with firearms and is very experienced with fighting hand to hand.

HOME: She doesn’t stay in one place for too long, so she really doesn’t have a home.

DAILY LIFE: She goes through her day-to-day tasks with her usually laid back attitude. Going out and doing a couple of jobs helps her relieve some stress.

INDEPENDENCE: Very independent since striking out on her own after selling her father’s ranch.

COOKING: She was a decent cook when she was alive but she hasn’t tried cooking after her death since all food tastes like ashes now. She does have a keen palate for blood though and can tell you all the complex notes hidden within.

BUILDING: She’s great putting together furniture, mending clothes, and just all around basic DIY.

CLEANING: She really doesn’t have a place she calls home, but she would be terrible at keeping up chores if she did.

SHOPPING: She’s not one for shopping sprees, only going to the store when it’s absolutely necessary.

DRIVING: She can drive if she has too but prefers riding on horseback instead.

FINANCES: She’s financially stable but doesn’t trust banks to keep her well earned funds safe. And she doesn’t really have to worry about paying bills since she has no home.

MARRIAGE: She was married a long time ago for a short time but now she’s single, and she doesn’t plan on getting married again.

KIDS: She had one daughter when she was alive.

PETS: She has a crow named Catha. She also tries to get a horse whenever she’s outside city limits.

DEPENDANTS: She has a vampiric daughter but she’s old enough to be out on her own.

LAW: Oooooh yes, she’s broken a lot of laws during her time as cowgirl and still continues to do so for various reasons.

COURT: She’s never been to court.

PRISON: She’s broken into prison a few times to free some friends but she’s never been an inmate herself.

TRAVELLING: She’s very well traveled but every day is a holiday to her.

MEDICAL: She doesn’t need conventional medical attention anymore thanks to her vampiric nature.

ILLNESS: She has PTSD and suffers from bouts of paranoia.

WORRIES: She worries about her daughter from time to time.

PEACE: She doesn’t mind peace and quiet when she’s in the mood but she prefers the hustle and bustle of people and great music over straight up silence.

PARTYING: She can never say no to a lively party!

HOBBIES: She likes to whittle wood into intricate pieces of art, usually in the form of lil statues and knick knacks.

#beretta #cowgirl vampire reader #OC questionnaire #Tales of Miss Fortune #YEEHAW! 🌹🤠🌹#harlot writes #harlot speaks

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hermajestykaje · 3 years

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Prologue

Julie Ann Sarif sat in the chilly examination room, one bare foot dangled above the freezing tiles, the other sat flat on the pullout stand. She wore one of the ugly paper dresses but she felt naked. Dr. Morgan had excused himself to take a call, but before she left, she had told Julie Ann that her blood pressure was high and had kindly asked why. This was why Julie Ann felt naked; always a private person, sixty seconds with a cuff around her upper arm had revealed that Julie Ann had had one hell of a year!

As she watched her dangling foot bounce, she realized she did not have to say anything at all. Dr. Morgan was her doctor, not her therapist or her friend, but Julie Ann was so desperate to unload everything on somebody anybody. Maybe that was why when the doctor returned a simple, “Now where were we?” Turned into an hour in that room that stank of disinfectants, with tears running down her face and the other woman hugging her awkwardly.

When Julie Ann left, she felt a lot better, but that did not stop Dr. Morgan from giving her a prescription for a half-dose of blood pressure medicine. Julie Ann was fifty-one years old and had never had blood pressure issues; then again, she had had one hell of a year!

Christmas was the prologue to the Hell Year.

“Nah, this doesn’t feel right.” Julie Ann had said to her husband Ahsan that morning.

“What?” He asked, she covered his mouth with her hand when she saw his lips begin to form the words you worry too much. He was right, Julie Ann always worried, but there was always a reason to worry. Ahsan was in the military, as soon as she got comfortable they would have to move, Julie Ann felt like they had dragged their poor children all over the damn world and back again. They had been in Florida for a long while, Julie Ann had started to get comfortable, she had started working at a bank again and could feel the promotion to manager coming when Ahsan walked into the kitchen and announced that he would be moving back to West Virginia. For a brief second Julie Ann had considered beating her husband to death with a skillet. He had promised that this would be his last assignment.

“I want to retire at home, Ma and Pops are old, I want to be near them.”

Once again her eyes fell on the skillet, maybe she wouldn’t kill him but bringing the pan upside his head would make her feel a hell of a lot better. “You want to move me from sunny Florida, to Wasteland Virginia int the middle of Winter? On top of all that you want me to be with crazy Miya?”

“Come on JuJu.”

“Don’t you JuJu me you son of a bitch!” She snapped and stormed past him, skillet still in hand. Ahsan was six feet, six inches and nearly three hundred pounds of pure muscle, she would have to jump to reach his bald ass head and he would easily avoid the blow.

“JuJu…”

“No Ahsan, you said this would be your last assignment. You said once the kids were grown you’d retire and we could finally start taking those vacations. You said Florida was cool, especially after Daddy died, you know how I feel about Momma being by herself. You always promise me things.” She gasped, “You’re selfish!”

“I am not selfish.”

“Yes, yes you are.” She rounded on him, “Stop following me.”

Ahsan took two steps back, hands up, eyes on the skillet. He had tried her once or twice before.

“It’s not the middle of Winter.” He muttered weakly.

Julie Ann flung the skillet at him, and he had the nerve to catch it! She spun on her heels and stomped upstairs, “Mind your damn business.” She shouted at their eldest, Nia on her way to their bedroom.

Her children and their alliance with their father was another source of irritation. Ahsan could do no wrong in their eyes.

Julie Ann sat on the bed and pouted. It would be nearly a week before she would speak to Ahsan again, and another week before he was allowed back inside their bedroom. He had spent time in the living room and in the nursery with their grandson. Julie Ann had told him to go to West Virginia by his damn self, yet when the time finally came for him to leave, she followed.

Looking back, Julie Ann had to admit that things were not as bad as she thought they would be, in fact, they were not even close to the way she imagined it. Ahsan did not have to live on base, and they got the gorgeous three-bedroom home in Magnolia Park, with the stuck-up neighbors and the pool in the back.

“Oh, your boyfriend’s here.” Julie Ann had said when they were moving in and Silas Johnson swung into their driveway. “Is he why we moved back here?”

“Stop.” Ahsan grumped and kissed the top of her head. The pair had been childhood best friends and Julie Ann hated Silas since the day she met him. There was something about him, he was cocky and every time Ahsan got into serious trouble, Silas was right there by his side. Not to mention Silas was a whore!

“Goddamnit, Ahsan.” She huffed when the passenger door opened and Silas’ new wife Grace. climbed out.

“Please be nice.” He begged.

Julie Ann was nice, and to her surprise she found that she actually liked Grace. The woman was the same age as they were but looked so much younger, she was tall and shapely; a dancer’s body! Grace was quick to smile and was an all-around pleasant person. Pity. Julie Ann had hated this woman for years without actually knowing her. When Julie Ann met Ahsan, Silas was already married to his first wife Esther. The two were close friends and most of their children were the same age. Silas’ daughter Sonja was two years older than Nia; his second daughter Amore was two months older than their second daughter Rayne, and their son Amir was two hours older than Silas and Esther’s daughter Zion.

Poor Esther had struggled during her last pregnancy, she had finally found out about Silas’s whoring ways and the stress had drained her. Silas had a daughter who was a few months older than Zion, but by the time the girl was born Silas had already moved on to Grace.

It was through Grace that Julie Ann joined Mamas & Mimosas, a small women’s club for mothers. She made new friends who helped with her transition. Julie Ann also started her home-based craft business and with the help of the Mamas, the business took off online and grew to something lucrative very quickly.

Julie Ann also stressed often about Rayne because of her crazy boyfriend…also named Rayne. She lost sleep over that relationship. “He’s going to kill her,” was what Julie Ann lamented a lot. She knew she was driving Nia crazy always calling and asking if she heard from her sister. On the other hand, “Amir is going to kill him.” He son was as big and buff as his father, it took a lot to make Amir mad, the boy was some kind of saint—but at the same time Amir had a temper and once triggered he became a beast.

“Rayne is grown.” Ahsan would remind her, but she had heard him threaten to kill boy-Rayne on more than one occasion.

That situation resolved itself when one morning, Ahsan opened the door on his way out to work only to find Rayne standing there with a suitcase. “Yeah, I nearly killed Rayne.” She announced and strutted into the house like she owned the place. “What’s for breakfast Ma?”

Ahsan was on her heels, “What happened? Did he hurt you?”

“That nigga cheated on me—again, and had the nerve to swing on me when I confronted him about it. I defended myself with a rolling pin. Anyways, I’ve got court in January.”

“Your sister and brother already know about this don’t they?” Julie Ann questioned.

“Amir posted my bail and Nia drove me to the airport.”

Julie Ann and Ahsan exchanged a look, their children always screamed that they wished each other was not born but would protect each other feverishly.

Rayne had always been the most daring of their children, so she often found herself in sticky situations. She was also the most hot-headed and provoking so she usually started fights with her siblings. She was closer to Amir than she was to Nia, although the pair were always at each other’s throats. Nia was the most stable of the children, she married her high school sweetheart Timothy and the pair had a son, TJ, together. Amir was a chaotic neutral, he was the most affectionate and shared a close relationship the entire family. He was the one who convinced Julie Ann to move with Ahsan. “I’m in this weird traditional phase with work, so I still have to go up to Louisiana all the time. I’ll keep an eye on Gran’Mere for you Honey.” Amir never called Julie Ann Mommy, or Ma, or Momma because Ahsan always called her honey, so somehow, he thought that is what he was supposed to call her.

Nia, Tim and TJ came up the week before Christmas, Amir was not sure if he would be able to make it since the Coast Guard had finally transferred him fully to Florida and people tended to be idiots during the holidays. When the front door flew open and Rayne strode in from her shift at the bar Christmas morning with her brother behind her, rather than feeling excitement, Julie Ann’s feeling of dread grew worse.

“Something’s going to happen to my baby.” Julie Ann told Ahsan when she caught him away from the children.

“Is this about the psychic thing?”

“You know my feelings are never wrong.” Ahsan did not believe in—as he puts it—mumbo-jumbo, but he had to admit that these strange inklings Julie Ann got were never wrong. She knew something was going to happen to his older brother, and not long after he ODed. She knew Nia was going to have a baby and a year to the day she told her, TJ was born.

“Let’s not focus on that. Let’s just try to enjoy the day with our family and friends, okay?”

“Yeah…”

All in all, it was a good day. Two year old TJ was his usual, dramatic self being the center of attention. He wanted to go swim in the pool since he did not understand that water froze in the Winter. He was usually attached to Tim or Amir’s legs and would rather play dominos with his Papa and the men than with the mountain of toy he received as gifts. There was an awkward moment when Esther passed by for some food and met Grace and the Mamas at the house. “We’ll get brunch on the weekend, okay?” Julie Ann said as a way of apology.

Silas disappeared for about an hour and the girls grilled Grace on where their father could have gone but she just smiled.

“Oh shit, that boy done brought his girl here?” Ahsan’s father Armand said.

Amir laughed, “Come on Pops, you remember Zion.”

Armand’s eyes bugged out of his head, “That’s Lil ZiZi? Got damn!”

“Stop.” Ahsan slapped his father on the arm and tried to swallow his laugh. The other girls swarmed their sister, there was a lot of giggling and squealing.

“Look at that fool.” Amir grumbled when Rayne pushed her way through the Johnson girls. When they were little and Rayne was mad at Amir, she always told him that she wished Zion was her sister instead of Amir being her brother and he would cry every single time.

Ahsan chuckled, “It’s so good to have my family all together in one place.”

Julie Ann felt his eyes on her.

Two days after Valentine’s Day, Ahsan came home early from work looking terrible and Julie Ann wondered if he was sick. He made her sit on the couch and took a seat beside her. “We’re going to Florida. Tim called. Something happened…with Amir…”

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castillon02 · 4 years

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Headcanon: Bond Recruits 002

She didn’t get hired, exactly.

She got referred to people who had certain problems, and when those problems went away, she got referred to casinos where she had improbable lucky streaks.

Her taxes read “Professional gambler.”

She was certainly a professional something.

---

Her newest problem was blond, buff, middle-aged, and worked at Vauxhall. Going by his garbage, he went through bottles of booze pretty quickly, usually the same brands of scotch and vodka. Surveillance showed he often lunched with friends, “Bill” and “Eve,” and had dinner either by himself or with one of a collection of married women.

The married women did not stay for breakfast. No one ever came over for breakfast, either. Not unexpected: breakfast was usually when she got the bachelors. Most single people ate their first meal of the day alone.

A meal deal was preferable, especially for someone with as many muscles as Blondie. She didn’t mind a close-contact job when it was specifically requested, but she much preferred to add a little spice to people’s cornflakes and wait until nature (via the swift hand of homegrown digitalis) took its course.

She had special orders to visually confirm elimination once she’d done the deed, but that should be a simple matter of waiting and then making sure the dead body didn’t kick back.

Though she had to get the digitalis into the guy, first. And he didn’t eat cornflakes or wheaties.

What he did eat, frequently, was scrambled eggs. Organic chives, brown egg shells, and wrappers for individual little pats of high-end butter in the trash... It could’ve been omelets, but there was never any cheese or other veg. No, this Bond was a scrambled egg man. She was certain of it.

The butter was probably the best way to go. She could melt it, add the digitalis, and then solidify it in the original package. One breakfast later, and someone would walk in to find that, shocker, the old man who’d been habitually eating buttery scrambled eggs for breakfast had died of a heart attack.

Yeah. Poisoning the butter was a solid plan. Especially because the guy’s security was terrible; just a regular lock on the front door. Probably one of those macho men who thought the sight of a muscular man in his underwear would scare away a Glock-wielding home invader. Ugh.

Well, if all went according to plan, he’d never know any different.

She practiced her digitalis butter technique a dozen times, and once she had a perfectly store-bought-looking specimen, she snuck into blondie’s flat while he was out and switched out his butter squares for her adulterated ones. While she was at it, she planted a bug under the kitchen table.

Now all she had to do was wait for the guy to fail to come out of his flat one morning, get a visual on his corpse, and high-tail it.

And hey, bonus! Free butter. She stuck Blondie’s overpriced butter into her purse and went back to her flat.

Maybe she’d make her own scrambled eggs tomorrow and share a meal with a dead man. Ha!

---

The plan went off the very next morning. No Blondie coming out of his flat. The bug had recorded the very distinct sound of a body slumping off of a stool and onto the floor.

She waited a good long time. She rang the flat’s number to see if he picked up. Then she went over and knocked on the door.

“Sir?” she asked. “The property owner has a question about the plumbing.”

No answer.

“Sir, I’m coming in!”

No answer.

She used her snap gun on the door lock and walked in. Body on the floor, scrambled egg pan on the stove, empty plate on the breakfast bar. Check, check, and check. She aimed a kick at Blondie’s ribs.

As her foot impacted his chest, Blondie’s hand reached up and wrapped around her ankle, and he looked up at her with his blue eyes twinkling mischievously.

Oh, fuck.

The skirmish after that was brief. There was a reason she preferred the hands-off approach.

“How?” she asked, hog-tied on the floor.

“Never fuck with a man’s scrambled eggs,” Blondie said, smug.

She gave him a skeptical squint.

“And there’s a secret camera in here,” Blondie admitted.

“There is not!” she said. “I checked!”

Blondie patted her on the head. “The people I work for,” he said, “are much better at secret cameras than the people you work for.”

She considered this. “You hiring?” she asked.

Blondie grinned. “I’ll put in a good word for you,” he said. “The butter thing was creative.” He paused, smirked. “I don’t suppose you want some eggs while we wait for your pick-up?”

“Fuck you.”

---

A couple years later, her taxes still read “Professional gambler,” but that was only because the government didn’t like people to put ‘Double-Oh’ on that kind of paperwork. She had a salary now. A salary and a regular date in the ring with Blondie, who hated that she called him that.

She still preferred hands-off work, but when people wagered on the outcome of 002 and 007 sparring in the gym, the odds were pretty damn near even. And she liked being the subject of bets instead of the one who made them.

#castillon writes #007 fest #team00 #james bond #LAST ONE #I'M DONE #FEST IS OVER #(collapses)

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myemotionalsupportcharacters · 4 years

Text

Mission #5

Type: One-Shot Series

Pairing: (Kingsman)Merlin x Female!OC

Summary: To celebrate their new start, the current Kingsmen take a night off to hold a small party.

Warnings: A little fluffy, drinking games, thirst

{Disclaimer: I do not own any characters except those marked as OC, I hold no rights over anything from the Marvel universe. Otherwise all content is my own and any similarity to real people, events, or any other fiction is unintentional. Please inbox me if you believe anything within my work violates this disclaimer.}

AN: Enjoy some random Merlin content on my Marvel blog because I’m going though yet another fixation faze. PSA: Mark Strong got jacked and I’m weeping at this gif.

It had taken a few months, but everyone was now settled in at the new Kingsmen Headquarters, and after all that work, they reasoned that a party was the next logical step. A small affair, just the eight of them (of course Tilde was invited) before they began their recruitment phase, once again headed up by Merlin. They had all agreed it was only right that Harry should head up the new Kingsmen, and had subsequently ascended to the title of Arthur. Eggsy had married Tilde and was now a Prince by title. Roxy had made a full recovery from the missile attack on the old headquarters and was feeling (a little like Merlin) lucky to be alive. Tequila, Ginger (she was technically now Whiskey, but as she was currently on loan from Statesman to help Merlin rebuild the technical and medical departments, decided to go by Ginger), and Vermouth had all found their groove.

Tequila mostly did what he wanted (just less recreationally) until it was go time for a mission. Vermouth walked around all day seeing where she could lend a hand and popping in to see Merlin when she could. They had developed a pattern. Harmless flirting, and secretive winks, although it was mostly Vermouth having all the fun. Merlin was a tough shell to crack, and with the lack of agents he'd been stepping out to do some recon in person. It was a party to celebrate many things.

So they gathered in the 'ballroom' as they had decided to call it. A large space in the centre of the new mansion that no one had really known what to do with until Vermouth suggested they let her do it up and make it into a ballroom. It was excellent and reminded Eggsy of his new parents-in-law's house. They'd all gotten dressed up, and hired Wilhem from the Tailors Shop to man the bar. A large jukebox in the corner linked up to the speakers and slowly they milled around, each picking a song of their own.

Vermouth had chosen a long wine red dress, with a gold belt, thin straps, and a slit that ran up the front of her thigh. Merlin had braced himself on arrival, but he hadn't been prepared for that. He still wasn't as she sauntered over to him at the Jukebox, a glass of Single Malt Scotch in one hand, and a darker liquor in the other.

"Penny for your thoughts?" She held out the scotch, and he took it, raising it with a nod to thank her.

"I wanted to pick a song, but I'm a little spoiled for choice." He mused.

"Well, a little birdy told me that you had a thing for country western music, so I just couldn't resist loading it up with a couple of classics...and a couple of new ones." Her shoulder brushed against his as she peered into the machine, he chuckled turning to face her.

"What would you chose, Ma'am?" She smiled, bumping her shoulder into him, pressing a few buttons to bring up the next songbook.

"Hmm, the ladies choice. If I pick a song, will you dance with me?" She never took her eyes away from the machine, fingers hovering over the play button.

"I think that depends on the song." He smiled, taking a sip from his drink. She chuckled, before hitting the button, the intro to Darius Rucker’s Wagonwheel playing over the speakers. She took a couple of steps back, before holding out her free hand for his.

"Care to join me?" He took her hand, neither putting their drinks down to move to the free space and face each other. Meredith changed hands, placing her right on his shoulder, and Merlin placing his right around her waist. Slowly they began to sway and spin. "Not to be the one to break up the party, but someday, we're going to have to do something about this."

"I think you might be right, lass." She looked up into his eyes, for once without glasses, and saw the smile lines next to the frown lines, the way his eyes seemed to speak for him. She smiled before stepping a little closer and resting her right cheek against his firm chest. He looked good tonight, a white shirt, unbuttoned and tucked into black slacks. His legs were so long, and she wasn't sure what it was about that, but there was something. "Good song choice." She felt his chest rumble as he spoke, and suddenly all she could imagine was falling asleep on his chest and smiled.

"Alright, that's about enough of the easy drinking. Time to get the party really started." Tequila joked. Vermouth had to give it to him, he looked good in a suit. She, however, had swapped out her denim jacket for a black leather one, not quite ready to start wearing a blazer yet.

"What you got in mind?" She asked, familiar with most of his self-created party games.

"I was thinking, Winner Takes All." Vermouth chuckled and nodded.

"What's Winner Takes All?" Eggsy asked, curiosity piqued, Tilde right with him.

"A game of my own design." Tequila bragged. "A question is posed to the group about something within the group, the group votes, and the losers take a shot." He explained.

“You’ve missed out a crucial detail, T. Bets on.” Vermouth points out as she and Merlin slowed their dancing. She quickly pilfered some bottles from Whilhem who smilled and starting collecting shot glasses.

“Right, right! So if someone calls bets on, you have to prove it.” He beams at the group, arms open as if expecting applause only to be met by confusion and amusement.

"Plead the fifth!" Tequila hollered, and Meredith smiled, placing the assorted alcohol on the table before flopping down onto the sofa next to Merlin.

"Let's get started." She grabbed one of Eggsy's empty beer bottles and spun.

“I’m not sure I understand how this works.” Merlin leant over to whisper in her ear.

“You’ll see.” She whispered back, and for a moment he got a scent of the sweet alcohol on her breath. It landed on Tequila, who whooped again.

"Alright, let me show you how it's done. We'll start tame. Which of the girls can do the most push-ups? Men vote." Slowly the votes trickled in. Tequila for Vermouth, Harry and Eggsy for Roxy, and finally Merlin also for Roxy.

"No offence Roxy, but y'all are fools. Bets on." Tequila laughed as the two women stood up, moving to the dance floor next to the couches, and onto their knees. "All right ladies, nice clean push-ups from both of you. Highest wins. Go." A quick fist bump and they were off. They both kept as even a pace as possible, not wanting to wear out too quickly, until Roxy started to slowly fall behind, the lads cheered them on, but it was too late. Vermouth beating out Lancelot by fifteen.

"Bloody hell, Di." Roxy gasped, shaking out her arms, Meredith mimicking her with a laugh.

"Alright boys, drink up and think of a question for Tequila over there." The two women stood, making their way back to their seats.

"Alright," Tilde's eyes narrowed as she looked around them. "Who is the most buff of the guys? Girls vote." Suddenly, a devious smile settled across Meredith's lips, not going unnoticed by a few of the group. All the votes pointed to Tequila, Tilda giving Eggsy an apology kiss who argued he'd say the same thing. Everyone looked to Meredith, who took a little sip before leaning back.

"Merlin." Harry chuckled from the other sofa and seconding her, and Tequila puffing out his chest.

"No way." He argued, the others joining in on the confusion. "You agree?" He asked Merlin, who sized up the other man before giving a nod. "Bets on."

Merlin gave a resigned sigh before shooting Meredith a look that sid ‘i’ll get you back for this’. Both men stood, Tequila shrugging off his jacket as Merlin unbuttoned his shirt. By the time he was done, Tequila was shirtless and waiting. Merlin shrugged off his shirt, tossing it onto the couch next to Meredith, and she got the sudden urge to crawl inside it.

"Holy shit, Merlin. You're jacked." Eggsy spluttered, Harry laughing and tipping his glass to his old friend.

"How did you know?" Tilde asked, eyes narrowing at Meredith.

"I flew out to patch him up in Columbia. You can't apply an Alpha-gel patch over clothing." She explained simply. Tequila held a hand out to Merlin who shook it, and Meredith never looked away from the rippling muscles of his back. Slowly he sat down and pulled his shirt back on, leaving a few buttons undone like before, but opting to roll up the sleeves, and suddenly Meredith's legs felt weak. "Sorry Tilds, but I think that counts as my question." She smirked. The questions were a little tamer after that, and soon got so silly that Roxy and Harry slowly began to diffuse the situation.

Merlin waited as Meredith closed the ballroom up, and walked to the residential wing together. Whilst he still had his own house, Merlin wasn't currently in a state to drive and didn't fancy the journey anyway, so was staying in one of the guest rooms. He walked Meredith to her room like a true gentleman, holding her heels for her as she clutched the nearly full glass of Dissorano she had insisted upon taking bed with her in one hand, and her now slightly too long skirt in the other. Halfway up the second staircase, she had almost dripped, catching her self on her knees, Merlin's hand under her right forearm to steady her as she peeled with laughter. Once they finally made it there, they stared at each other in silence for a moment, assessing.

Merlin made the first move, weaving a hand into her hair and cupping the side of her head as he pressed his lips to hers. She lost her breath at the sensation, strength pouring through, whilst he was met with soft and yielding. He pulled away, stroking his thumb across her cheekbone, before moving away. Meredith reached out and grabbed the front of his shirt and pulling his back to her. It was a far more intense kiss, her tongue slipping out to run across his lower lip and he nipped at hers in response. Her back pressed against the door, and somewhere in the back of her mind, she reminded herself not to drop the glass. She tasted sweet, like marzipan, where he tasted of something woody, and strong. Remnants of alcohol brushing over her tongue. They parted, panting, eyes wide and panting breaths. amidst this moment she managed to mumble out,

"That's how you say goodnight."

#merlin #kingsman #kingsmen secret service #kingsmen #kingsman secret service #merlin x oc #series #oneshot #mission

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tomshufflepuff · 6 years

Text

changed

pairings: peter parker x female!reader

requested: yes by @embrace-themagic,

“Hi there! I was just wondering if I could please send a request? The idea is a Peter Parker x Reader where either Peter is a bully and pushes the reader over the edge and she falls apart and he feels bad and tries to make it up to her, or he and the reader are good friends and he says a harsh comment about the reader to his crush and the reader overhears and he tries to make it up to her? So sorry if this is oddly specific and it’s totally fine if you don’t want to do it! 💖💖 xx”

word count: 10.8k go me for writing a fucking novel for my first imagine, so sorry if the read more tab doesn’t work :(

warnings: peter’s an asshole, angst, you need a hug, peter needs a hug, language, loneliness, please let me know if there are any others!

---- means time skip

-- means different location

-------------------------------------------

“Watch where you’re going,” a harsh shoulder bumped into Y/N, causing her to drop her binder. “Fucking moron.” The person muttered.

The teenage girl sighed as she leaned down to pick up her papers that scattered from the drop. Questioning herself for what seemed like the millionth time, what happened between her and her best friend?

Peter Parker and Y/N Y/L/N used to be the best of friends. The girl moved into the apartment above his when she was just five years old, her mother and father splitting up and going separate ways. Her mother wanted her young daughter to make friends, so did the aunt and uncle of the boy who lived on the other side of their wall. Y/N’s mom forced her to come with her as they introduced themselves to their new neighbors. Which was strange because they never really did that. But the pair saw the young boy and his uncle one day after Y/N’s mother got her registered into school. Her mother melted at the sight of the young, shy boy who hid behind his uncle’s legs after they stepped off of the elevator. Everyone knows how a mother’s heart melts when they see another small child. She just wanted to squish the boy’s adorable chubby cheeks but of course she didn’t.

As the girl and her mother walked by the boy and his uncle, Y/N’s mother gave him a small smile. Uncle Ben seeing the interaction as he waited for his wife to collect her purse and join him and the little boy on a walk to the park. He gave the young mother a smile and waved, Y/N’s mom returning the favor. The two dorks made eye contact, his shy brown orbs meeting Y/N’s exciting e/c orbs. The girl immediately flashed him a bright smile and a small wave. A faint red covered the boys cheeks as he clutched his uncle’s leg, a small no teeth smile evident on his face. Y/N’s mother unlocked the door to their apartment and Y/N bared a goodbye wave to the young boy. This time, he did wave back, a smile showing off his pearly baby whites.

Uncle Ben and Y/N’s mother saw the interactions between their little tykes and gazed at them with so much love in both their eyes. Her mother finally poking the girl’s shoulder and motioned inside of their apartment. Y/N frowned, not wanting to leave the young boy but her mother gave her a playful but stern glare. She let out a sigh of disappointment and gave the young boy one last smile before stepping into her home. Uncle Ben waved goodbye at Y/N’s mother before she did the same and shut the door.

Not long after that, Y/N’s mother met Aunt May as they were getting onto the elevator. The young mother frantically got on the elevator in their apartment building just before it closed, with the help of a certain, kind lady already in it. “Thank you so much!” Y/N’s mother rushed out as the doors closed. She was trying to catch her breath and just wanted to go home and rest as she hunched over from a hard day at work.

“Oh, it’s not problem.” The older woman smiled. “What floor?” The mother looked at the buttons on the console to see her floor number already pushed.

“I actually live on the same floor as you!”

“Really?” May beamed, a chuckle escaping her lips. “That’s something.” The mother nodded in agreement as she picked herself up and stood straight, her arm reaching out to offer a hand to the young aunt. “I’m Y/M/N, Y/M/N Y/L/N.” Her lips turned upwards ina smile despite the obvious tired state she was in. May reached out with a smile and shook her hand. “May, May Parker.”

After that, the women immediately became good friends. They both talked about their kids. Well, May’s nephew but he might as well be her son. The women tried getting their children to meet and become friends, taking advantage of the same age between the kids.

Peter at first joked about Y/N having cooties, to which Aunt May scolded him and Uncle Ben laughed. “This girl is clean, Peter. Don’t worry.”

How could the two not bond? They both loved science and mystery. Bonding over solving problems and reading science journals together while watching Star Wars and other Sci-Fi thrillers. Young Y/N took a liking to Peter right away. She was eager to meet new people and the fact that he loved a lot of the same things she did was a plus. They were both young, but loved to solve mysteries and puzzles while pretending to play house and kingdom at the park. Peter didn’t know how to feel at first, he was shy and very guarded. But something the happy girl’s spirit drew him towards her and he loved spending time with her.

And once memes became a thing, the kids would not shut up about it. Adding that to the long list of things they bonded over. And then hell broke loose for May and ben Parker along with Y/N’s mother when Vine became a thing. It wasn’t a bad thing though, they just quoted and copied a bunch of stupid and corny vines every single day. They did hardcore parkour for about a week until Peter ended up spraining his wrist and Y/N broke her arm at the park.

They grew up together and went to the same schools, sharing classes together every year and annoying every teacher they shared together in each class. Some of the teachers would never admit it, but they found the pair endearing and absolutely adorable.

Peter was shy growing up, but around his best friend, he didn’t hide one part or detail about himself around her. He was happy, joyful, carefree, just enjoying his childhood and his teenage years with his best friend by his side.

But after his uncle Ben died freshman year, he changed. He was no longer carefree, he no longer had a spark in his eyes when he was surrounded by the people he loved. He felt dull, empty. For Uncle Ben was like a father figure to him. Y/N understood that everyone deals with grief differently, and that’s completely okay. She were there for him as much as he’d let her. Aunt May too.

Over the first couple of weeks following his uncle's death, he allowed his best friend to be there for him. He let her comfort him, he let her try to cheer him up with movie marathons, food and corny jokes, especially old and outdated Vines. He called her every time he needed someone, and she were more than willing to be there for him and help him get through this.

But after a month, he completely shut her out.

Y/N thought it could’ve been a part of his grieving process. Instead, she checked in on him once or twice every other day, instead of five times a day. He needed space, he needed some alone time, which she understood completely. But she also asked aunt May how they were both doing every single day. Aunt May never told Peter though, sensing something was off between the two teenagers.

He also seemed to be working out. Y/N noticed his growing muscles under his usual sweater and jeans. The arms that once held her in tight hugs were more stiff and buff. Sure, she thought he was already beautiful and gorgeous. Now, now she thought he was hot, looking like the typical high school jock. But she wished he didn’t matter how much he was pleasing to look at. He was just fine before. But her and Aunt May figured that he was working out to distract himself, and/or stress.

But then Peter stopped hanging out with Ned. Oh Ned, his brother. Ned was someone the two best friends met when they were all in middle school. Flash Thompson was giving Ned a hard time, so Peter and Y/N defended Ned. Peter with words, Y/N also with words, but also her fist when Flash made a comment about Ned’s weight. Y/N got detention, but she didn’t care. After detention, she saw the two boys waiting for her on the bench outside of the detention room. The three of them instantly becoming a trio.

Ned, Y/N and Peter went to each other’s homes frequently. When one of them came home every day from school, the other two followed. They all had movie nights every Friday during the school year. Ned and Peter picking Star Wars 99% of the time it was their turn to pick a flick. Y/N joked how she was getting tired of Star Wars, which caused the two boys to playfully shun her until the movie was over. She started making them watch Harry Potter, them complaining but both ended up loving the films almost as much as Y/N did.

But around the same time Peter started avoided her, he avoided Ned too..

And he started hanging around people like Flash Thompson.

That was the thing the now duo didn’t understand the most. Flash picked on all three of them, but he always seemed to have it out for Peter more. Taunting him, making fun of his name, how he dressed, how he acted, just using any information he could find to turn and use it against Peter.

Now, Peter waltzn along the halls of Midtown High with Flash. They taunted their fellow classmates as they passed by them. Whether it was mocking something they said, tripping them, pushing them against a locker, judging from afar you name it.

Sadly, Ned wasn’t with the tired girl today. Of course, Y/N was sad he wasn’t there, but also thankful. Thankful that he wasn’t here or else Flash and Peter would’ve been assholes to him too.

She continued on picking up her papers. She silently thanked the universe for being on her side today. In the past when Peter did the similar thing to her, the mess seemed to get larger. She would lean down and try to collect more papers, while the ones she already retrieved fell out of her arms and onto the floor again.

Y/N sighed as she stood back up from your knees, tucking her hair behind her ears and meeting eyes with Liz Allen. She gave you a sympathetic smile with pity laced behind her enchanting brown eyes. Liz was also popular, but she wasn’t your typical cliche of a popular teenager. She was kind, patient, caring, easy to talk to. She welcomed the three of you to school at your orientation freshman year, Liz becoming an acquaintance to the three fo you.

She knew how inseparable the trio were. Especially Y/N and Peter. Anyone would be able to spot the certain look they had in their eyes whenever the other was in the same room or mentioned. Ned became annoyed with the two as they fell for each other but were too oblivious to the other’s feelings and too stubborn to accept that the other felt the same. The way Peter held her in his arms whether it was a hug or them cuddling, the way she would give him a wide and loving smile each time she finished laughing at a stupid joke he told, the way they would act, already extremely touchy and needy for the other. There were so many little things their peers would notice, especially the larger and more obvious things.Liz felt sorry for Y/N and Ned, but also for Peter. She knew that wasn’t the real Peter Parker. She knew he wasn’t an asshole who hurt others and found joy in it like Flash did. She wished he would just cut the stupid act as did everyone else who knew him before he changed.

Y/N was always jealous of Liz when Peter revealed to you and Ned that he had feelings for the upperclassman girl their first year of high school. But she could never not like Liz because of stupid jealousy, plus Liz was actually a good person. Ned noticed the jealousy too. She told Ned of her feelings she harbored for her best friend with deep brown eyes and chestnut colored hair. He wasn’t surprised, though. Everyone noticed her affections towards the kind boy. Everyone, except for him.

Y/N didn’t know how to react to Liz seeing that. The pitiful look making her blink back tears as she looked at the ground and quickly shuffled to her next class. Thankfully, that class not being with Peter Parker.

----

Lunch time rolled around and she sat by herself today. Well, sort of. MJ was sitting across from her, but she was silently eating an apple and reading a book. She were used to that behavior from her for a while now. Y/N and Ned befriended MJ shortly after Peter ditched the pair, her actually being the first to approach them both. Noting how observant she was, she pointed out Peter turning into a douche and offered to be there for her and Ned. It was weird in some ways. MJ didn’t know how to deal with emotions, or how to help someone deal with sadness. But it was still very kind of her. She tried her best to give the duo advice and distract them from Peter’s newfound attitude.

Peter Parker sat at the table ten feet ahead. Laughing with Flash over something that was most likely stupid.

There was a sense of loneliness and despair in Y/N’s e/c eyes. She gave him a longing look every day during lunch at least once. The brown haired boy catching her a couple of times, using that to make fun of her.

MJ took a bite of her apple and glanced at Y/N above her book, her brown eyes immediately meeting her sad ones. MJ rolled her eyes, already knowing who the hopeless girl were looking at. She glanced over her shoulder at Peter laughing. She knew it was fake, she knew Peter wasn’t happy. But she never chose to talk to him about it. Him not being worth her time, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t try to tell Y/N that.

“You know,” MJ paused as she turned back to her friend. Y/N shook her head, snapping out her gaze on Peter and looked at her. “He’s faking it.”

“Michelle,” Y/N sighed, shaking her head and looking down. “Why do you keep saying that?” MJ already knew she was going to ask that. She was already to fire back, but Y/N said her full name instead of her nickname. That meant that she just wasn’t in the mood.

“Y/N,” she sighed, setting her bookmark in her book and putting it on the table and sat up. Y/N’s sad e/c eyes met her sympathetic look. “Peter isn’t happy. I can tell. You know how well I can read people. Even that jackass,” including that remark to make her laugh, and it worked. “He isn’t truly happy. He doesn’t have the, twinkle,” MJ shuttered at the cliché word making her chuckle again. “in his eyes that he had when he was doing something that made him happy. Or around someone who made him happy.” The pause directed at Y/N, causing a redness to appear on her cheeks but she shook her head as quick as it appeared and MJ continued. “Every time I see him push or tease a kid, he frowns. He frowns when Flash isn't looking. He’s so disappointed in himself for swooping down to that level and becoming someone who he hates. But he continues to do it. He continues because he’s lost and he’s fighting himself to stay this way. Something’s making him to hold back. That frown, that look of despair on his face every time he does something contradicting with his old self, he’s not happy. It’s an act. He’s faking it.”

This isn’t the first time she’s said something like this. But this is the first time she went into this much depth. Y/N’s heart was hopeful each time she mentioned this. Maybe some of the old Peter is still inside of him. His heart and his mind having an internal battle on how to treat other people, this occurring after Ben died and he got his Spider-Man powers. He didn’t know how to process his emotions, it was too much. Thus started the battle between his mind and his heart, neither side surrendering.

The girl who was once friends with a now superhero never spoke her true feelings for her old best friend, to the girl sitting in front of her. MJ was smart and very clever, she already knew. So Y/N never bothered to say it out loud to MJ.

“You got all of that just from looking at him a few times?” Y/N joked as a small grin formed on her chapped lips.”

MJ rolled her eyes playfully, her mood brightening because her friend was cracking a joke in this hard time. “Well duh. I’m a fucking genius, you already know this.” Y/N’s smile widening as she shook her head as MJ continued. “Plus I heard him frustratingly scolding himself this morning after he purposely knocked into you once him and Flash separated.”

That was something Y/N never heard before, and she didn’t want to believe it. But MJ wouldn’t lie to her, especially on something like this.

Y/N shook her head in doubt. “I’m just done with this. I’m tir-”

“Hey there bitch!” A voice yelled at her.

The voice coming from the boy her heart melted for.

The voice coming from the boy who she would do anything for.

Even if he was a dick now.

The voice coming from Peter Parker.

And he was walking towards her.

He strolled towards the table the girls were sitting at, jumping on top of the bench MJ was sat on, landing right next to her on his bottom. He made himself comfortable as he wrapped an arm around MJ. She flicked towards him in disgust, elbowing his side in annoyance. He grunted, trying to play it off as a playful groan while clutching his side with his hand. “Wow, MJ, I’m hurt.”

“Shut the fuck up, Parker. What the hell are you doing here?”

“Woah, woah,” he held his hands up in defense. “Just here to say hello.”

His statement caused MJ to roll her eyes and before she could say something, he spoke up again. “And to say something to her.” His head whipped to Y/N so fast and he smirked at her. Her eyes widen, scared of what was going to happen while looking into his mischievous eyes. MJ stood still, not knowing what to say.

“Look, Y/N,” Peter sighed as he put his arms on the table, leaning on them. A serious look was on his face as he scrunched his eyebrows. This small action reminding her of the old Peter, her Peter. How his eyebrows always furrowed whenever he was trying to say something or figure something out.

But that quickly changed. MJ not being surprised at all.

He bursted into laughter. “What is with you?!” He shouted amusingly. “Why do you keep on staring at me? It’s creepy. It’s weird. Not to mention, with a longing look like I just ran over your dog and stomped on your heart. Seriously?! Are you that pathetic? Are you that lonely? Are you that sad that I left you?” He was throwing his head back in laughter as he kept on asking.

MJ’s jaw clenched as she burned holes in Peter’s head. If looks could kill, he would be worse than dead. But since looks can’t kill, she settled for shoving him off of the bench.

His ex best friend was already trying your best to not to break down right there, her heart already hurting and Peter was just making it worse. Y/N only gasped when MJ pushed him off of the bench. Of course she were worried to see if he was okay, the\ old part of her who is still his best friend was urging her to get up. But she couldn’t move. Her feet were glued to the ground, her bottom feeling like it fell asleep, her eyes looking at the scene in front of her with warm tears she was trying oh so desperately to hide.

Peter groaned and sat up, holding his head while sitting flat on his ass. But he jumped back up easily, like he tripped but caught his footing. And he backed up a few inches because he was frankly a little scared of her. Who wasn’t?

“Wow, that hurt.” He mocked as he looked at MJ, fear evident in his eyes that only she noticed and she quirked an eyebrow at him and smirked.

Peter rolled his eyes and continued, whipping his head just a smidge to meet Y’N’s sad e/c orbs again

Peter’s heart clenched, seeing his favorite girl in pain and especially knowing he caused it. He was so close to running to her side and pulling her into his arms. So close.

But he recovered. Hoping MJ wouldn’t notice his sign of weakness.

“Move on,” he growled at her. “Stop staring at me. Stop following me. Stop stopping by my house when I’m not home to talk to Aunt May.” She looked down, fiddling with her fingers. “Yeah, you think I didn’t know?!” The only reason he was because keeping an eye on her himself. May didn’t tell him. Why would she? Her nephew was hurting the girl who was his best friend.

The girl he was in love with since he first laid eyes on her ten years ago. He didn’t know it then, he was a little kid with a tiny crush. But over the years, that crush turned into something much bigger.

MJ stood up furiously and was about to storm towards him as he ran back to his table with Flash, who was watching the entire time and laughing.

“Don’t,” MJ heard her friend croak and she turned back to her. There was a new look on her face that Y/N finally allowed to reveal on the outside. Brokenness.

“Just,” she sighed as she blinked back hot tears and stood up quickly. “Just don’t.” She grabbed her belongings and exited the cafeteria faster than Peter could flick his wrist and shoot a web at her.

Liz saw what happened from her table. She saw as Michelle grumbled and grabbed her book. MJ stood up and grabbed her unfinished apple, walking quickly to Peter and Flash when they weren’t paying attention. She chucked her apple at Peter’s face, the red fruit hitting him in the eye as he groaned and clutched his head. Flash gasped and looked up at MJ, seeing her smirking in victory and walking away. She was still angry though as she walked out of the cafeteria doors.

Liz shook her head in shame as Peter was groaning at his eye. She observed Flash trying to aid to Peter, quietly laughing to himself when Peter was closing both of his eyes in pain and leaning his head back with his right hand covering his right eye.

“Let-” Flash muttered as he was trying to stop laughing. Of course Peter knew he was, he didn’t need his new senses to guess. “Just take your hand off of your eye and let me see.” He managed to get out while trying desperately to stop laughing.

Peter rolled his left eye as it was closed and reopened it while putting his head back down, carefully removing his hand. He knew it was bad. He would have to go home early since he healed fast and the mark would be gone in less than two hours.

“Go get an ice pack man.” Flash laughed as he pulled out his phone and began to scroll through random things.

He didn’t need really need one. He needed to do something much more important before he went home so he grabbed his backpack and walked out of the cafeteria, already knowing where she ran off to.

Y/N sat in the library with her legs pulled up to her chest and her arms wrapping around her legs. Her head was in her arms as her hair fell down her elbows. Quiet cries left her mouth as she hid in the one section of the library that no student walked into. Let alone the section she was in.

She was trying to hide her whimpers as best she could, good thing no one was really in the library anyways.

Y/N’s heart was trying to find out where you went wrong.

When did she do to cause Peter to hate her with every single molecule in his body?

What did she do to cause him to snap?

Why did things go so wrong when before then she was his shoulder to cry on?

For fuck’s sake, what changed?

For fuck’s sake, what will make him stop?

Peter entered the library, Y/N heard the door open but she just assumed it was another lonely student or someone who was going to study. He heard her cries, even though he was on the other side of the huge room filled with so many different words that could describe how they were both feeling perfectly because they couldn’t.

He heard her sobs, warm water beginning to blind his sight. But Peter couldn’t let you see that.

A heavy breath escaped his thin lips as he straightened himself up, wiping his tears that slipped out of hi brown eyes. He couldn’t let Y/N see him like this. He just had to apologize. He wanted to show that he didn’t want to, but he knew he did. That was something his heart and mind could agree on. But he couldn’t let her see that. He wouldn’t let her see that. The new him saying if he’s going to do this, he’s not going to show he’s breaking.

His feet carried him in the direction of Y/N’s cries. Even if his heart didn’t belong to her, his feet would still bring him to her. They always would. And right now, his legs were shaking as he walked closer to the Ancient Egypt and Ancient Rome section.

She was always a sucker for history, he smiled.

Peter’s brain stopped his motions right before he was about to step into the aisle. Another deep breath escaped his lips and he realized he hasn’t taken a single breath since he entered the library. He sighed and his heart finally allowed him to take another step, flinching when his eyes landed on Y/N’s figure.

His breath caught in his throat as his eyes scanned her over. He almost choked back another sob. Almost.

But he did have to blink back tears and wipe the ones that managed to escape his eyes.

The girl with a damaged spirit heard someone breathing and looked up, seeing the last person you ever wanted to see.

But there’s also a part of her that was glad he was standing, what felt like so close to her heart.

The two broken hearted teens didn’t say anything. Y/N’s gaze looked so, broken. And his gaze, well she don’t know how to read him anymore, not since he’s changed.

He was broken though.

Peter cleared his throat, his eyes never leaving her own as he walked closer to the girl he grew up with. But he stopped once he saw that she flinched away from him.

That broke his heart even more.

But he couldn’t let her see that.

So he sat against the same shelf as her, about a couple feet away with his legs out and his hands fidgeting on top of his lap.

Y/N was shaking, hoping that he wouldn’t notice that. Or her heart beating so fast, it felt like it was going to jump out of her chest and make grabby hands towards Peter’s heart.

But he did notice. And he did hear. His own heart feeling the same way. But his wouldn’t just make grabby hands towards her’s. His would get on its knees, begging for your love again. (If you’ve watched the short film, “In a Heartbeat” on YouTube then you get where I’m playing at lmao go watch it if you haven't because it’s so good and cute).

Y/N unfolded her arms from around her legs, but kept her knees tucked into herself as she fiddled with her fingers.

She did that when she were nervous or when she didn’t know what to do.

The habit was already known to Peter, and he was glad she never grew out of it. She looked so adorable when she was awkward.

Y/N could feel the deep brown eyes of the heartbreaker boy, giving her an intense look. His doe eyes not burning holes into her, but just looking at her calmly.

But it was also sad if she looked up at him.

“I uh-” Peter stammered out. “I just wanted to say that that was uncalled for-”

Her head whipped around to meet his haze. But a new expression was in her tired e/c eyes.

Anger.

“What?” She croaked out, hating herself for sounding so weak and internally scolding herself for it.

“What exactly was uncalled for, Peter?” The harsh and it made Peter wince. And she noticed, but instead of immediately checking to see if he was alright like she usually did, she let out a laugh. “You’re wincing? Why! You don’t have a reason to!” She said harshly. “What was so uncalled for, Peter? What is it that you want to apologize for?” Her tone wasn’t meant to be harsh. But she couldn’t help it. She was just done with this ridiculous act of his.

Of course he knew what she were asking. But he continued to act stupid and looked down at his lap shamefully. “W-what I said to you back in the cafeteria. It was uncalled for and rude and, and-” his arm went to scratch behind the back of his neck. A nervous habit he still had and let show. “I’m, I’m sorry.”

You almost laughed, almost. But that was harsh. Even though he has hurt you so many times these past few months, even though your heart was still pulling you towards his, you couldn’t get a laugh out. Your heart not wanting you to hurt him no matter how upset and broken you were. Because you never want to hurt it. Even if he’s caused you so much pain. You just couldn’t. That wasn’t who you were.

Y/N sat in a cris cross position and let out a heavy sigh, playing with her fingers, trying to blink back tears and using her hair as a shield so the young superhero couldn’t see her trying to hide her pain.

Thankfully, he didn’t that time.

“Why?” She squeaked, looking up to meet hs unreadable brown orbs. “Why now? Why apologize now? It’s not like anything has changed.”

That statement and her harsh tone made Peter break down even more, on the inside. He was also questioning himself that.

Why now? Why did he rush to her without thinking twice?

“Uh-I” He looked back down at his fingers. “I don’t know. I just felt like I had to apologize and quickly walked here after I realized what I had to do. For you.”

“Okay well,” the young girl sighed, not knowing how to respond to the last two words he spoke. Her stomach flipped in a good way, but she also felt like she was going to throw up from the confusion. “Thanks for the apology.”

Those words made Peter’s head snap up and look at his old best friend. Hope filled his heart and entered his eyes once again. Hope felt strange, foreign to him because it hasn’t been apart of his wellbeing for so long.

“But I don’t know if I can accept it.”

And just like that, the hope quickly vanished faster than what felt like the speed of light.

“I can accept it in the future, just not now. My heart, my feelings, are still hurt from everything you did and said. But I do feel that I will be able to forgive you someday. But not this second. I want to, but can’t. I hope you can understand that.”

Peter nodded understandingly as Y/N sighed and got up quickly. His eyes never left her figure until she grabbed her backpack and he looked down at his lap, hearing her footsteps fade

Peter leaned his head back on the bookshelf in despair. His eyes were burning with the familiar liquid now. The boy sniffled as he wiped them away, cursing himself for breaking down. He quickly exited the library and ran straight for the men’s bathroom.

Not seeing MJ see him rush into the room and wipe his eyes.

----

It was the last class of the day. Robotics. To her dismay, she shared this class with Peter, but Y/N enjoyed this class and tried to avoid him as much as possible. But after his apology in the library, her heart didn’t want to avoid him completely. She didn’t know if it was sincere and she didn’t want to think about that right now. But her feelings were pushing her towards the boy who still owned her heart.

“What happened in the library?” MJ asked as she plopped down in her seat across from Y/N, causing her to jump to little. Ned was in their group but he wasn’t there today. She gave her friend a questioning look, causing the brown haired girl to roll her eyes. “Don’t play dumb with me, Y/N. I already know that’s where you ran to and I hate that it took me until after lunch to figure that out. I saw Peter running out of it in a hurry, his eyes were red and he wiped his eyes as he went into the boy’s bathroom.”

Y/N couldn’t believe it. Peter crying? After the conversation they had? Surely MJ was mistaken. She almost asked her friend if knew what she saw, but MJ was right 99% of the time.

“Maybe, um, uh- do you think you could be mistaken?” She stuttered. MJ rolled her eyes and gave her a glare and you threw your hands up in defense. “I’m sorry! But maybe this is the 1% of the time where you’re wrong. Because he couldn’t have been crying, not after-” she paused and looked down at her lap.

“Did you reject his undying love for you or something?” MJ teased and Y/N gave her a playful glare and the girl rolled her eyes for what felt like the thousandth time that day.

“No, we just talked. He actually apologized,” MJ raised her eyebrows impressed, but was going to deny his apology before Y/N interrupted. “I know, I know it’s weird. I know you’re gonna say he didn’t mean it. And I want to believe you. But the part of me that misses him, misses my best friend-” “The boy you’re in love with.” “Whatever.” MJ smirked and Y/N sighed. “I miss him. And that part of me just wants to forgive him and make things right, make this all disappear and go back to the way before all of this shit. But, I can’t trust him.” MJ put her hand on Y/N’s arm to comfort her as she continued. “I thanked him for his apology. But I told him I just can’t accept it right now. And I told him that maybe in the future I can forgive him. I just can’t right now.”

Y/N looked back up at MJ and she was giving her an intense look, showing her she was listening. “Good.” She lifted her hand from her friend’s arm. “I’m shit at emotions and helping other people with them. But you did the right thing.” She flashed you a small smile and you did the same in return.

Peter could hear every word shared between the two of them at his own table that was across the classroom.

School had just ended and that meant practice time for the Academic Decathlon team. Y/N always avoided Peter during your after school team meet ups. And he made it surprisingly easy. He barely even spoke to Flash during practice because he was very focused on the team and serious about team practices. Him being a mute and concentrating made it easy for them not to speak to each other.

But Peter still stole glances at the girl who owned his heart when she wasn’t looking.

Liz was getting her Decathlon coat from her locker, cursing herself for leaving it in there. “Hey Liz!” She heard the familiar voice and immediately rolled her eyes on the inside.

She turned to her left and flashed Peter a fake smile. She didn’t like him one bit. She did see him as a good friend the previous school year, but when he ditched his best friends this year and became a dick, she no longer wanted to be associated with him in any way.

“What’s up Peter?” Liz internally cringed at the fake chirpiness in her voice.

The sheepish boy flashed her a small smile, pain evident behind his eyes that she noticed.

He really wasn’t good at hiding secrets.

“I was um, just wondering” He stuttered as he played with his sweater. “If you wanted to maybe go to the movies sometime, with me? On-on a date?” She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. Of course she knew he harbored feelings for her. She saw that last year but only saw him as a friend. Plus, she noticed he was in love with someone else.

She tucked her hair behind her ear nervously, “Um, that’s really sweet, Peter-” His face instantly dropped at her response, knowing what was coming next. “But, I just don’t see you like that.”

The new and cocky Peter took offense right away. “Why?” He demanded then saw she raised her eyebrows. “Wh-why? May I ask?”

Liz had enough with his fake attitude and rolled her eyes. “Seriously Peter?” Although, Peter already knew the answer. “Well one, you’re a major dick and a bully. You used to be so sweet, so kind and considerate to others, especially your friends. But then, this year you changed. And at first when you stopped talking to Ned and Y/N, I figured it was maybe a part of your grieving process and you just needed some space. But then you befriended Flash. Eugene fucking Thompson of all people! The boy who bullied you since what Ned told me, elementary school. And to make it worse, you became just like him, actually even worse. You abandoned your best friends, not to mention the girl who loved you with her entire heart, and you became a bully. You, Peter Parker, became a bully. That’s why.” She finished angrily as she slammed her locker door shut.

And of course, Peter had to fire back with something stupid. “Girl who loved me? You mean Y/N?” He said hopefully, but he tried hiding it of course but Liz still noticed.

“Yep, and the girl who everyone thought, you loved with all of your heart. But guess not.” She shrugged and she wrapped her coat around her.

Peter stood still, not knowing what to say or how to feel as he stared blankly at the locker next to Liz’s.

She couldn’t be serious? But that didn’t stop Peter’s heart from bursting with joy and a small smile to break out on his face. Most importantly, the twinkle. The goddamn twinkle in his eyes were back. He felt overjoyed, the girl he fell in love with since he first knew what love meant, loved him back? How? Why would she? He was just puny Peter Parker. Boring, plain, not interesting, and just an all around weirdo.

Oh Peter, if only you knew how much of that was untrue in Y/N’s eyes.

He had to cover himself up and get it together. But Liz noticed, only a fool wouldn’t notice his reaction to the possibility of his best friend loving him in the same way he loved her.

“You’re joking right?” He scoffed and Liz was so close to punching him in the face. For not only being an idiot, but for trying to cover his reaction up and bury it in the past. Past as in two seconds ago.

“You can’t possibly be serious.” Peter started laughing as Liz tilted her head at him and glared.

“Me being in love with Y/N? Y/N Y/L/N? Really? No! She was only my best friend. Key word, was. I can’t believe people thought I was in love with that girl? Above anyone else, people believed I had feelings for her? Ew, just, just gross.” He fake scoffed and Liz was deadass about to punch him square in the face, not caring about detention like she usually did. But, a figure caught her eye.

And it was the last person in the whole damn world who should be hearing him say these things.

Liz’s heart broke when she saw Y/N standing a few feet away behind Peter.

Liz knew the anger she felt towards Peter and the hurt she felt for the e/c girl, was nothing compared to how Y/N was feeling that moment and when she turned around, running away from the two.

Peter immediately whipped around to see the last person he wanted to her those hateful comments, running away from the pair, his whole entire being just completely breaking.

If he wasn’t completely done and broken this time. He sure as hell is now.

“You’re a fucking idiot. You better go after her, Parker.” Liz grumbled as she shoved Peter’s shoulder while walking past him.

Yeah he better fucking go after Y/N.

And he was going to.

Without thinking twice.

Tired of fighting the old him and his feelings for his best friend.

He was done fighting. He was done acting. He was done faking it. He was done acting like this was all normal.

And he ran after her.

----

Y/N didn’t go to the library this time. This time, her feet carried heart to the garden behind their school. It was small, cozy and comforting. The young girl loved it. She knew she should’ve went somewhere else. But her body collapsed onto the bench on the hard ground as sobs rocked through her stomach. She couldn't get up, she couldn’t go anywhere. She was frozen. Completely defeated and alone from the one person she thought would never intentionally hurt her.

Of course Peter didn’t check the library. Even though he treated Y/N like shit and abandoned her, he still knew her. Even if he wanted to forget everything about his old friend, he just couldn’t. He knew every fact about her. She never changed. Only he did.

She had many small areas on the school’s campus that she admired. But Peter’s improved legs did the thinking his mind couldn’t comprehend. And he felt like he was flying to the small garden area.

He heard her cries, the second time today making him hate himself more than he already did. She were laying on her back on the comfy bench. Using her hands to shield her face from the sun as she cried.

“Y/N-” Peter choked out as he saw her break. Anger flooded through the broken girl’s body. She was already hurt, ashamed, broken, but now, now she was angry. Now she livid. Not just at him, but at herself as well.

Y/N shot up from the park bench and stood up. What was the point of even hiding her face anymore?

“No! No- you can’t- you can’t just come here and talk to me with tears streaming down your face and a broken look in your eyes. You don’t get to do that, especially to me. Fuck you, Peter Parker. I hate you with every fiber in my being.” Her feet carried herself closer and closer to him as she said this. She would’ve said more. She almost called him a coward. Almost called him an asshole for what he did to not only her, but Ned too and everyone else he’s treated badly. The livid teen almost yelled at him in frustration, but she couldn’t. Her mouth wouldn't allow the harsh words to slip off of her tongue, no matter how true they were. But her finger pointing shamefully at Peter with every word that spit out of her mouth was just the icing on top of the well understood message. But she wasn’t touching him as much as she wanted to jab her finger into his chest, she couldn’t. And yeah, she didn’t hate him, but he didn’t need to know that as she walked past him angrily.

“Fuck it,” he cursed to himself as he turned and flicked his wrist towards the girl he loved.

Y/N felt a sticky substance wrap around her arm like a hand and she yelped as she was being pulled backwards.

She ran into the broken boy’s chest with a slam as he caught her in his arms, wrapping her in them. Y/N stared up and was met with the soft eyes she so absolutely adored. She noticed pain behind the captivating orbs now. She could usually spot it from afar but could never get a good look at them for the past few months. But being this close in proximity to him, not to mention his arms holding her like she would slip away at any moment, was enough to break her down more. She didn’t think she had any more left of her heart that could break. But seeing her boy broken, that ruined her.

Peter stared down into her e/c orbs that held so much loneliness and betrayal in them. He didn’t know what to do as she stared up at him blankly. Y/N was too tired to fight him, so she collapsed into his arms, her body loosening and completely letting herself fall into his embrace and he caught her.

He always caught her.

She leaned her head on his chest with tears running down her gorgeous face. Her best friend put his chin on top of her head. Peter took in her shampoo scent and he sighed, feeling like it’s been an eternity since the last time he inhaled her.

Tears were soaking Peter’s shirt, but he didn’t even care a slightest bit. He cursed himself in his head. For hurting her, for leaving her, for betraying her, and for breaking her heart. She was fragile but also strong. Peter has only seen Y/N cry this much once when her grandfather died. He was there for her during her time of mourning and was always there to be her shoulder to cry on. He was always there to make her smile. But now, he caused her this much pain. And he was never there for her. He just added onto the pain.

Y/N kept on muttering curses at Peter but she was so choked up, he could barely make out what she was saying.

He pulled away from her a little, causing her to look up and meet his chocolate colored orbs. His smooth, warm hands met each side of her face as he gently held her like she was porcelain. “I’m s- so sorry,” he spluttered out with fresh tears in amber eyes. “I’m so sorry for everything. I’m sorry for the hateful words and harsh comments. I’m sorry for the mocking and making fun of you. I’m sorry for abandoning you and Ned. I’m sorry for shutting you out. I’m sorry for not being there for you. I’m just-” he paused as he closed his eyes, causing the tears to fall out faster. He looked down in shame and took a deep breath. “I’m, I’m so sorry, Y/N. I’m so fucking sorry.”

Y/N didn’t know what to say. She was going to question him about the webbing.

Was he Spider-Man? Did he make the webbing? Was he a copycat?

But there were more important things she had to discuss with him and question him about.

The broken girl shook her head as the devastated boy opened his eyes shamefully. “Why, why Peter? Why did you do all of- all of those horrendous things? Why did you leave me? Why didn’t you ever tell me what was really going on? You know I would’ve tried to understand and support you and be there for you,” she couldn’t help but raise her right hand onto the boy’s cheek. He immediately leaned into her touch with a soft sigh. “When did you stop caring about me?”

The defeated tone almost made Peter collapse right then and there. “I never stopped caring about, Y/N.” Peter croaked as he stared into her e/c orbs deeply.

“You said that earlier today, I don’t know if I can believe you or not now this time.” She looked down and their feet and Peter didn’t know what to say. He did apologize just earlier that day for one thing that happened and she didn’t know if he meant it, and he couldn’t blame her. Now he’s apologizing again, just hours later, but for everything. He didn’t blame her if she didn’t trust him or believe his words were sincere. He’s hurt her far too much.

Y/N sighed and wiggled her way out of Peter’s arms after he didn’t answer her for a couple of minutes. Well, she tried.

Peter snapped out of his gaze the moment she tried to wriggle out of his arms and he looked back down at her captivating, gorgeous face. He sore each time he looked at her beautiful face, he fell even more in love with her.

He just never showed it.

“Y/N please,” Peter pleaded as he tried to get her to look at him, and the h/c haired girl stared up at her ex best friend again.

“Peter, I don’t know if I can believe you.” She continued to squirm in his arms and Peter loosened his grip on her, letting her slip away.

She backed up about a foot from him before she was about to turn and run again. “Please just- just let me explain.” She hasn’t seen him look broken since his Uncle Ben passed.

She hasn’t seen him in this much pain since then.

She could see it in his eyes.

In that moment, she saw through his act. Peter didn’t try to stop her by forcing a fake glimmer or look of mischievous in his eyes. She saw that this Peter, was fake.

This Peter, wasn’t who he truly was or who he truly wanted to be.

This wasn’t her Peter.

She closed her eyes and let a deep breath escape her dry lips as she stood there still, giving him permission to speak.

“This isn’t an excuse for abandoning you. I just want to start off with that.” He said as he motioned closer to her but stopped once she saw her flinch away.

He didn’t try to hide the fact that that action hurt him.

“I got, these powers shortly before Ben died.” He said as he rolled up his sweater sleeves to show her small web shooters. “I’m Spider-Man.” She gave him a puzzled look. She may have looked broken, but she still looked gorgeous in Peter’s eyes.

“Okay, I don’t see how that made you want to leave me.” Her eyebrows furrowed, making her appear adorable to the young boy in front of her.

“I was bitten by a radioactive spider that day we went to Oscorp. I felt the changes inside me that night I got home and I woke up the next morning with a six pack.” He chuckled through his tears and Y/N smiled a little at him.

“Shortly after that, you became a little cocky.”

Peter cracked a smile at her small remark and nodded. “Yeah uh- not one of my proudest moments.” He scratched behind his neck and Y/N gave him a “duh” expression.

“I felt so confident with my new strength. But one night- I left the apartment and Ben, he-” He choked up causing Y/N to go into best friend mood and she rushed to the boy and hold his arm gently for comfort.

Even when he hurt her, time and time again, she was still there to comfort him.

“Peter, you don’t have to say.” She murmured as she gave him a kind gaze. He met her warm look and shook his head and looked back down at his feet.

“No, I uh- I have to.” Y/N didn’t bother to try arguing with him, she just rubbed his sweater covered arm. He was feeling cold, even in the sweater from the light fall breeze. But her touch on his arm made him feel warm again throughout his whole entire body and it gave him goosebumps at the same time.

“I left the house because of an argument I got into with Uncle Ben. He ran after me. I didn’t know he did. I wish I knew. I figured him and May would let me cool off but after the police showed up at our doorstep, I should’ve known he was going to worry about me and chase after my footsteps.” He took a shaky breath as a tear slipped down his cheek. Before he could wipe it with his sweater, Y/N put her hand on his face and rubbed his cheek, her thumb sliding underneath his eye to wipe it away.

She never removed her hand and Peter leaned into her touch once again as he continued on with the worst day of his life.

“I passed a robber along the streets. I could’ve went after him but I didn’t. It’s normal in Queens for people to get mugged yes, but I should've done something. Especially to him.” Another tear fell down his toned face and his best friend was quick to wipe it away. “Turns out, shortly after I avoided stopping him, Ben actually tried to.” Peter smiled at the thought of his generous uncle. The chance of a weapon being on a robber in New York, was about 75% of the time. But Ben didn’t care. He’d always put others before himself. Even if it was just some stranger’s purse. He was the real hero who made Peter into one.

But Peter’s smile quickly faded as he recalled the horrifying events from the worst night of his life. “Witnesses say he was trying to get the purse from a man in a ski mask, but the robber pulled out a knife, and he-” Peter choked and completely broke down to the ground.

His knees were already wobbly and that was the final straw.

And this time, Peter collapsed into Y/N’s arms.

She pulled her best friend into her chest, his head above her breasts as he cried into her Harry Potter t-shirt and he wrapped his arms around her figure. Y/N held his face in her hands as her best friend sobbed in her arms.

They stood like this for about five minutes. Y/N running her hands through Peter’s hair as that always kept him calm. His sobs started to get more quiet and she continued to whisper, “It’s okay, Pete, I’m here. I’m here, let it all out. I’m here. I’ve got you, Pete”

He missed the nickname that would fall from her lips.

“I’m sorry.” He said into her once he calmed himself. She shook her head and pressed a chaste kiss on top of his head. “You don’t have anything to apologize for, Peter.”

He lifted his head up and stared at her with a serious look in his eyes. “Yes, yes I do. Uncle Ben dying is no excuse for me abandoning you and Ned. His death is no excuse for my behavior and who I’ve become.” He let go of his best friend and sat him but she grabbed his hand for support as he sat out in front of her with his legs out. “Him dying, my powers fucking with my emotions already and messing me up. Me changing. God, Ben would hate me so much of he were here right now.” He whispered.

Y/N had enough. Yes he did hurt her and he was right about his father figure’s death not being an excuse. But he wasn’t right about his last statement.

“Now you listen to me, Peter Benjamin Parker.” She grabbed his face in both of her hands, making his baby fat squish up a little and she smiled at his cute face. “Ben would never, I repeat, never hate you. He would be disappointed in your actions, yes. Like any father world be if his child did something wrong” She rubbed her pointer fingers along his cheeks to calm him down. “But he could never hate you. He would never even try to bring himself to hate you. May wouldn’t either.”

Peter looked down at his lap, Y/N’s hands till holding his face.

“Peter,” she whispered as he looked up to meet her pleading eyes. “Please believe me. That man could never hate you. That man could never not forgive you. He does not blame you for his death. He doesn’t hate you for who you’ve become. He could never fucking hate you, Pete.” She flashed him a small, beautiful smile.

Right then, Peter knew he’d be okay. He was repeating the sincere words the girl who he adored spoke in his head, over and over again. Her smile, sincere, bright and stunning, meant for him, he knew he would be okay.

“I just, I couldn’t deal with his death and let myself become cold. I didn’t want to be close to you or Ned, fearing that what happened to Ben would happen to one of you. Especially with being Spider-Man, I have a lot of enemies. And if anyone ever find out who I was and used you, Ned or May against me, I don’t know what I would do with myself.” She gave her best friend a sad smile as he continued. “I would rather have you both hate me and be safe, than be close to me and get hurt. Ben getting hurt without me even using my powers urged me to push people away. I became Spider-Man shortly after his death before I left you and Ned. I vowed to never let anyone, especially those I love, get hurt in any way. And I vowed to never think, ;Someone else will take care of it’ ever again. I thought by you and Ned close to me, would put you in danger and I couldn’t risk it. I’m so, so goddamn sorry, Y/N.”

“Peter, hey Peter look at me.” Y/N said desperately as he began to break down again. Peter looked deeply into the eyes he loved and calmed his breathing with long breaths with the help of her. “I forgive you, Peter. I’m so sorry I didn’t try harder with-”

Peter right away shook his head. “No, Y/N don’t ever blame yourself for a second. This isn’t your fault. I didn’t want to be close to anyone, but I ended up hurting you anyways too.”

“Oh, Peter.” Y/N cooed as Peter closed his eyes at the feeling of her warm hands touching him.

I don’t deserve this.

I don’t deserve her.

“I should’ve never said or do those awful things to you and Ned, especially you,” he cried. “There’s no excuse for the harmful comments or taunting or me pushing you around. And I hope you know that.” A look of pure sincerity was in Peter’s eyes as he reopened them to look into Y/N’s eyes. A small smile appeared on the girl’s face as she nodded at her best friend. “There- fuck.” He sighed as he shook his head frantically with a laugh escaping his lips. Y/N removed her hands from his face and Peter found himself missing her home feeling.

“I was in love with you,” he mumbled and looked up at her.

Y/N’s eyes widen. How could he be in love with her> Especially after all of his remarks made her think the exact opposite.

The confused girl furrowed her eyebrows. “Pete, what? How were you in love with me-”

“I still am.” Peter pleaded as Y/N shook he head and stepped out of his embrace while running a hand through her soft hair. “It’s one thing to leave because you wanted to keep me safe, but that I understand. Why would you hurt me by saying all of those cruel things to me?” She questioned in disbelief.

“You were trying just hard to be there for me like you always do. But I had to push you away somehow. That’s no excuse for me continuing on with it and becoming a dick and befriending fucking Flash of all people.” He stepped closer to her with every word he spoke. And this time, she didn’t back away.

His rough, warm hands met her’s and laced his right hand with her’s wanting to see her reaction. She almost made a comment about his rough hands. They’re usually smooth, but when he doesn’t take care of himself when he was going through a hard time, his skin became dry and rough.

“I was in love with you too,” Y/N whispered as she gazed up into his chocolate eyes. “And I still am. Even after all of this, I am still ridiculously in love with you, Peter Parker.” She chucked and a tera slipped down her cheek, Peter’s left hand going up to wipe it with his thumb like she did to him moments ago.

“You know one thing you said that really fucking ruined me?” Peter didn’t want to hear her answer, he would beat himself up more for every single thing he said that was hateful and mean to her.

“You made it sound like people assuming we were together, in love with one another, that it was just some repulsive thing you would never want to happen. Not only did my best friend hurt me, but so did the boy I feel so desperately in love with. Not only did I think he didn’t feel the same, but you were so disgusted by the fact of people thinking we have feelings for each other. And you said all of those- those gross things about me.” She shook her head and looked down. “You know if you didn't feel the same way, I wouldn't’ have been mad. We can’t chose who we fell in love with. We can’t chose who we have feelings for. I wasn’t hurt by that. Just you being repulsed at the slightest idea of us.”

Peter cursed himself inside his head while listening to her. “I know, I know and I’m so fucking sorry, Y/N. I don't’ know what came over me.” She looked back up into his honey eyes as he blinked back a tear. “I was trying to get over you and I figured dating Liz would help. I thought of I said those comments out loud, they would seem true. But they weren’t. The were the exact opposite of the truth.” Peter held her face in his hands.

She didn’t flinch away that time.

“I know it makes no sense, how I said I didn’t want anyone close to me because that would be outing them in danger. I needed so badly to get over you and just wanted to see if one date would Liz could help with that. But it wouldn’t even if she greed.”

“That sounds so stupid but understandable.” The girl chuckled through her tears.

A small grin broke out on Peter’s face. His best friend’s smile being the most contagious thing he’s ever come into contact with.

“Yeah. Especially how when the words came out of my mouth, I realized that even with one date, I’d be putting Liz in danger. I didn’t think it through very well.” The heartbreaker boy laughed.

“I just needed to get over you.”

Y/N gasped at him in shook and she swore to the universe that her heart stopped right then and there.

“I don’t know if I can do this though. Us.” Peter bit his lip as he looked down and back up at her, nodding his head in understatement. “I just- my heart is still trying to piece everything together. I don’t even know if I can be friends with you right now.” His heart broke and he looked at her with sad eyes. “Maybe again, soon. We can go back to everything as it was the first time we got into a fight.” Chuckles escaped both of their lips as they remembered their first feud. “We can slowly build our relationship back together. I just need time.”

Peter grabbed her other hand in his. “You can take all of the time you need. I’ll wait for you, Y/N. Even if we don’t end up giving each other our hearts. I’ll still be so grateful to have you back as my best friend. Let alone my friend.”

----

ew this was so gross fsefjhsfdf i might do a part two for y’all if you like. It’s going to be in the future and we’ll see if these two crazy kids end up together ;)

Please give feedback! Even constructive criticism, especially when I’m actually trying writing again after over four years :) Don’t be mean about it though please lmao

Until next time my loves

tagging some nice people: @tomsfireheart @suddenlysmittenxwrites @wndrlstvbz

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