#my dad doesn't have a job so we can't afford some of the things I need

[lunarriviera]

hi hey hello i have started watching a new crime drama and I AM OBSESSED. it's called 雪迷宫 or, for some reason, The First Shot, although it should be more properly Snow Maze. it's a period piece set in 1997 and it's produced by ZHANG YIMOU which must be why the production values are actually good??? anyway i am here to tell you all about it and why you should be watching it okay here we go

first of all there's a big hot dumb cop, zheng bei. yes that's huang jingyu and you might not like him because of his apparently quite sketchy personal life but all i care about in this case is that he's tall, and thoughtful, and a police captain who's protective of his people and a little bit of an idiot. my catnip tbh. (i guess he was in addicted too? somehow breaking the you-can-only-be-in-one-BL rule?)

(ETA that by "dumb" of course he's not dumb at all, only by comparison; cf. my own stupid meta on this fascinating topic)

then there's an effete genius consultant, gu yiran (wang ziqi), who knows everything there is to know about drugs. he comes from the south to help these ignorant northerners form an anti-narcotics unit. he's such a massive nerd, the team doesn't like him until they realize that he runs 10k every morning and can outrun motorcycles and is actually quite useful. then suddenly it's no longer "gu-laoshi" but is all "ran-ge" this and "ran-ge" that. he can't dance for shit. i adore him.

there's a superb seven-samurai style Assembling The Team sequence in which this cop is brought in as the muscle. Her nickname is mad dog yao and she kicks the ass of an entire club at one point. we love her. her only problem is that, not unlike zhang haixing in tibetan sea flower, she will in fact fight a wall. here's gu yiran's face after a drug dealer mistakenly underestimates her and she stomps on him.

one of my favorite things about this drama so far is how poor the police are. it's 1997 in a dinky northern precinct and these cops ain't got shit. no computers. rudimentary cellphones. barely any forenic analysis, and most of that is on pieces of paper. no bullpen. no interrogation rooms. they have to interview suspects at their desks.

captain zheng is so underpaid he can't even afford a real pointer for his situation board, he has to go outside and get a literal stick.

drives his dad's chicken delivery van. has to slam himself against the front door to open it. everything about this is absolutely perfect.

i'm only on episode 7 but this shit is already brotastic. please behold:

yes that is an actual line from the show. yes gu yiran has to live with captain zheng, they can't afford fancy accommodations for him. turns out there's a trundle bed made out of paper clips but that's okay, they still get plenty of cosy domestic time together.

and that's also what i already love about this drama—in spite of being about anti-narcotics, it's also very slice of life, very daily city life, with meals and neighbors and friends and family and did i mention food, there is so much eating in this drama. it's gorgeous. also i'm improving my colloquial chinese by leaps and bounds.

of course you are you stupid service top, now take care of the baby.

and those are just some of the reasons why you should be watching the first shot, which is funny and suspenseful and unexpectedly brainy and well-cast and has beautiful opening credits. there are 19 episodes on youku's youtube channel right now and the subs are shockingly high quality. i'm hooked, and also so mad at my day job because i can't just binge it, pls join me in this handbasket

[delulujuls]

i'd give you the whole world if i only knew its price | ls18

am i a lance's girlie? no. am i becoming a lance's girlie? dont look at me

he seems so sweet idk why people hate on him

summary: lance's love language is giving gifts and when it came to giving something in return he'll accept only one way

warnings: none

pairing: fem!bffreader x lance stroll

The little girl sat on the curb, tears streaming down her rosy, tear-stained cheeks. In her tiny hands, she held her shattered helmet, unfit for further use. The girl wasn't crying because her father had scolded her for accidentally damaging the helmet. Instead, it was because, until she could find a replacement, she wouldn't be able to race with the other kids. That is, if there were any funds available for a new one.

Seeing the seven-year-old in tears, a slightly older boy, aware of the reason behind her distress, approached her with his newly purchased helmet in hand, crouching down in front of her.

"Here, you can have mine."

The girl stopped sobbing as he sat beside her, handing her the helmet, which she hesitantly accepted.

"I can't take it, my dad doesn't have any money left."

"You can take it, I always have two helmets with me."

The boy smiled at her, but uncertainty still lingered on her face. He glanced toward his father, who stood under one of the tents, observing the children a few meters away. Seeing the tearful face of the girl and the joyful expression on his son's face, he also smiled slightly and nodded.

"See?" he said, squeezing her hands that held the helmet. "My dad agreed. You can take it as a gift."

"Really?"

While her face was still wet from tears, her eyes no longer radiated sadness. Looking into the brown eyes of the boy, he nodded and he stood up, extending his hand.

"By the way, I'm Lance. Now, come on, it's about to start!"

"Please, Y/N, don't be like that."

The boy slumped onto the hotel bed, closely watching the girl's face on his phone screen.

"I'm sorry, Lance, but I can't."

She replied, her phone propped up against a coffee mug, engrossed in browsing job listings on her laptop.

"Why can't you just take it as a gift?"

Y/N scoffed and shook her head.

"Every month you give me some gift, Lance. Last month, as a 'gift,' you bought me a Birkin bag, and I don't even want to know how much it cost."

"You said your bag was falling apart, I wanted to make you happy."

She sighed and shifted her gaze to her phone. Lance looked at her attentively with his puppy eyes, visibly concerned. He wasn't seeing any problem here.

"The bag is gorgeous, and you have no idea how much joy you brought me," she said with grattitude in her voice. "But even a simple Target bag would make me happy, you know?"

"Yeah, probably. But this one is okay too, right?"

She laughed and shook her head.

"It's beautiful. Thank you very much."

Hearing her words, Lance breathed a sigh of relief. Seeing her smile, he did the same.

"So, if you want to repay me, let me fly you to Bahrain."

She lowered her gaze, and the smile faded from her face. Barely scraping by on bills and struggling to find a new job, spending her remaining money on plane tickets was the last thing on her mind. Even if, it could cover just one ticket.

"I can't afford to visit you, Lance."

"That's why let me take care of it. We haven't seen each other for so long, and I want to finally see you and start this season together," he said, looking at her worried face. Money meant nothing to him; he could send a private jet to pick her up, just to have her with him. "Please, Y/N."

She sighed and shook her head.

"I feel so embarrassed. I'll never be able to repay you for all of this."

"So, is it a yes? Can I book the tickets?"

He asked, hope in his voice, and a smile slowly crept back onto his face.

"Fine, but no more gifts this month, okay?"

"I'll try to meet that condition."

Lance and Y/N had been friends since the day he noticed her crying next to the carting track, holding her damaged helmet. They remained friends through all the years of go-karting, and their friendship persisted even when Y/N had to give up racing due to financial reasons.

At first, though she shudders at the thought even now, she hated Lance with every fiber of her being. It wasn't him she despised, but the obscene amounts of money his father had, providing him with everything he could dream of. Y/N was aware that Lance had both many fans and critics, so every time she came across unfavorable comments about him online, she felt embarrassed. After all, she used to cry and curse him every night, even though deep down, she didn't hate him; she just disliked the situation he was in, which she was not allowed to have.

Lance himself knew that without money, he would never have entered the serious world of motorsport. Numerous training sessions, expensive lessons, academy tests – Lance knew that money secured his current position, but talent couldn't be bought. He knew he could drive, and even the people who hated him online knew it too, disliking him simply because he succeeded. Being in Formula 1 cost the Canadian a lot, as he constantly felt like he didn't belong there. Even in the paddock, despite rarely facing personal comments, he knew many saw him as the boy with his daddy's big money. Lance often felt lonely, so he deeply appreciated every moment he could spend with Y/N. No one was as important to him as she was.

However, Y/N focused on being an ordinary teenager after giving up her motorsport career. She finished high school, got into college, even found a job and rented an apartment. Although her life didn't unfold exactly as she wanted, she stayed connected to motorsport through Lance, whom she supported as much as she could. Now things were getting complicated again as the season was about to begin, meaning she could only cheer for him from her couch. But for Lance, there were no such limitations. If he could solve a problem with money, he would. Furthermore, Lance found immense joy in showering Y/N with various gifts. Giving her presents was his love language, something that Y/N had no clue about.

"There she is."

Lance smiled at the sight of his friend, who stepped out of the taxi in front of one of the Bahrain hotels. She returned the smile, hugging him.

"I was talking about the bag, but it's nice to see you too," he teased, pointing to the Birkin she was holding, prompting her to playfully nudge him. Lance chuckled and embraced her, taking her suitcase and leading her inside the hotel.

"I hope the flight was okay and you're full of energy because we're going to a team dinner tonight."

"So, basically your dad is inviting us to dinner?"

She asked jokingly, looking at him as they entered the elevator.

"Technically, yes, my dad is inviting us to dinner."

Y/N laughed, "Well, Lawrence Stroll can't be refused."

Shortly afterward, they were on the right floor where both of them had their rooms. Lance handed her the key card and when she entered her room, she noticed a bouquet of roses and a small package on the bed.

"Lance..."

Turning around, she saw him biting his lip, trying to hide his smile.

"Yes, yes, I know, we had a deal. But these roses were practically free and the little gift next to it is, let's say, a shared one."

He explained, putting aside her suitcase. She also placed her bag down and approached the bed, picking up the bouquet of white roses. She smelled one and smiled, feeling their pleasant fragrance. Lance smiled too.

"You're impossible, you know that?"

"Open the gift."

He encouraged her, leaning against the wall.

She smelled the flowers once more and put them aside, taking the small package wrapped in black ribbon. As she untied it and unwrapped the light-colored paper, she discovered the familiar shade of green. It was a long, satin dress with thin straps, in the characteristic color of Aston Martin. She smiled to herself.

"I guess this is for tonight's dinner?"

Lance nodded, "Do you like it?"

"It's beautiful," she ran her fingers over the fabric, "I hope you have a shirt in the same color."

He chuckled.

"Don't worry, I won't disappoint you."

Indeed, at the agreed-upon time, Lance showed up at her door, wearing a shirt in the same color, black jeans, and matching shoes. He smiled at the sight of his friend, who opened the door ready to go.

"You look gorgeous. The color suits you."

Y/N laughed and closed the door behind her.

"That's good because otherwise, I would have to wear the white dress I brought with me, and someone might think I'm supporting Haas."

Lance laughed at her words, pleased to spend these few days with his friend. Honestly, he only stopped feeling lonely when she was around or when they had the chance to talk on FaceTime. Of course, it wasn't the same as having her physically by his side.

The evening passed in a pleasant atmosphere and time flowed effortlessly. Lawrence invited everyone who had arrived with Aston Martin to Bahrain, so instead of reserving a specific number of tables, Lance's father rented the entire restaurant for the evening.

Celebrating the team's excellent work during the winter months, the tables were adorned with champagne and white wine. Y/N had forgotten how weak her head could be, so after two glasses of wine during dinner, a slight buzz started to occupy her mind. Apologizing to Lance under the pretext of going to the bathroom, she stepped outside, sitting on the balcony. Despite being February, Bahrain offered pleasant temperatures, and even after the dark, a warm breeze caressed her exposed arms.

"Here you are."

The girl jumped, hearing his voice.

"You weren't around for half an hour, and I had the waitress check if something happened to you in the bathroom."

"I needed some fresh air."

Y/N replied, smiling at him. She noticed Lance's steps were a bit unsteady and a blush adorned his cheeks. When he sat next to her, she giggled.

"I can't believe we got tipsy."

Lance chuckled and rubbed his face with his hands.

"I won't lie, I'm feeling a bit dizzy."

Still giggling, the girl rested her head on his shoulder. Lance wrapped his arm around her waist and rested his cheek on her head.

"I'm glad you came."

"I'm glad you invited me."

"I'd give you the whole world if I only knew its price."

Hearing his words, Y/N raised her head and looked at his face. His brown, gentle eyes gazed at her affectionately and a faint smile played on the corners of his lips. Lance tucked a strand of hair behind her ear, gently caressing her cheek with his thumb.

"I hate that I can't give you anything in return."

Lance smiled, "Actually, there's something you could give me in return."

The girl raised her eyebrows inquisitively.

"You could be my girlfriend."

Y/N blinked several times, unsure if her slightly intoxicated mind was playing tricks on her or if she understood Lance correctly.

"Do you want me to be your girlfriend?"

"Oh, God, you have no idea how much."

The girl smiled and, without saying a word, cupped his cheeks in her hands and kissed him. Lance hugged her even tighter, returning the kiss, feeling a burst of fireworks in his stomach. He could bring her joy with money, and she could do it in just one way.

"I love you, Lance."

With love.

[storiesbyjes2g]

3.102 Negotiations

I thought about the whole money tree argument all night, and while I understood Sophia's concerns, it still didn't sit well with me. Dub's words from his note echoed in my head. "Financial freedom to pursue your dreams," he said. I knew she preferred to live a simple life, but didn't she have bigger dreams than just being married to me and raising our children? I heard the TV on, so I got up to address the topic again. My goal wasn't to change her mind—though I hoped she would—but to present my case coherently. I was blinded by the simoleons I didn't even have yet and failed to put a counteroffer on the table. If she could hear my thoughts, maybe she could see it in a different light.

"Good morning," I said.

"Have you ever seen this show? It's so fun!"

"Uhh...no. Can we talk?"

"Of course," she said, turning off the TV. "What's on your mind so early?"

"I want to revisit the money tree situation."

"Okay. Sure."

"You presented your reasons for limiting its use, but I don't think I did a good job explaining why I think we shouldn't, and I'd like you to hear what I think."

"Okay," she said slowly. "So, what's up?"

"You said it would be an insult to return the gift, but I think it would be an insult to ignore Dub's wishes."

Her eyebrow went up a little bit, but she was still tracking with me, so I went on.

"I understand your hesitation, but we don't have to let the money change anything about us. We can be ourselves, but with peace of mind and more opportunities. I think maybe your childhood is influencing how you're seeing this, but so is mine. I'm gonna tell you a different part of my story so you can see where I'm coming from."

"Sure."

"Okay..."

I took a deep breath and hoped my story would work some magic.

"You've been around my parents enough to know my mom is the one with the money."

"Yeah. That's obvious."

"Right. She spoiled us...she still does, heh. But we weren't spoiled brats. We had everything we needed, and a few things we wanted, but we didn't live extravagantly. We went to public school, wore regular clothes, and lived in a middle class neighborhood. For a long time, my mom had an office job. And even now, she still works her candle business. We weren't rich by any means. We were comfortable. I know this because when we went to my dad's house, it was not comfortable. He came home tired every day and didn't have the energy to spend time with us. He never took us anywhere, and there was nothing to do at his house-"

"But that's not what-"

"Wait. Let me finish. I haven't made my point yet."

"Okay. Sorry."

"My grandparents bought my mom a little house and gave her a chunk of money when she moved out so she could have peace of mind and time to explore the world and figure out what she wanted to do without the pressure of bills and working a job she hated."

Sophia nodded and smiled, giving me hope that my story already inspired her to change her mind.

"When we moved out, she did the same thing for us…except for the house, of course. It wasn't a ton of money, but I could have gotten a cheap apartment if I wanted to."

"Or a tiny house," she said, gesturing vaguely.

"Ha! Yeah, I could have afforded this. She's still taking care of us. I keep telling her she doesn't need to keep doing things for us, but all she says is when I have a child, I'll understand."

Sophia nodded.

"Yeah...I remember hearing her say that in Tartosa."

"Yeah... I may not have a child yet, but I do want to give it every opportunity I had and then some. I don't want it to worry and feel how we felt at my dad's house."

"I get that. I don't want that either."

"And what you said about your parents. They were older when they adopted you because it took forever to save the money. If we want to send off our children with a little something, we have to start saving now. We can't wait until a week before they're gone to start harvesting the tree. Maybe we don't take from it every day. Maybe just once or twice a week, or whenever we think about it. But just leaving the tree alone until we need it? That's not gonna give our children the kind of future I want them to have. I want to continue what my grandparents started. I don't think we should waste this opportunity."

She sat there, nodding and staring at me like she didn't realize I was done. But then she turned away, stared at the floor, and sighed.

"Wow... Your family history is filled with so much love and support."

I grabbed her hands, hoping to seal the deal and provide a little comfort.

"Yes. And you're part of that family now. I just want to continue the cycle. That's all. I don't want to start wearing labels and buy a big house in Del Sol. I just want to spend time with my family without consequence."

"I can't argue with that. I'm still not letting you give up on yoga, though."

I laughed. "I didn't expect you would."

"And to be clear," I continued, "I'm not gonna give up. I just don't want to be in a position where I'm still hustling and missing everything going on at home. You'll be here, so I know everything will be fine, but I want to be here too. I want our children to have all the benefits of living in a two-parent house."

"That's beautiful, Luca. I see the whole picture now. I've just decided I'm definitely not to going back to work."

I beamed at her.

"Really?? That's awesome! I love that for you."

"So, what do you think you'll do?"

"I don't know yet. I don't want to give up on teaching just yet, but I'll probably spend more time on SimTube. I have time to figure it out, though. Speaking of the hustle...I gotta go. I love you, Sophia. I love our life, and I can't wait to see how it turns out."

"I love you more!"

[cyberneticnightmares]

okay listen.

i like to think that william inherited the purple car from his old man. you know how it was back in the 70s. cars lasted and often got passed down from father to son (SYMBOLISM). he hated the damn thing, but it's what first caught henry's attention one day while on campus. henry drove a much newer car.

while william went to college solely on scholarships courtesy of his smarts and obscenely high GPA, henry's parents footed their son's bill because they could afford it.

"how can a couple of hippies afford to send their kid to school for art?"

"double majoring, actually. dipping my toes into business too."

william hates him for it. it's just so unfair that henry can afford to dress nice but doesn't, because he much rather walk around in comfortable overalls covered in paint. he hates him even more when henry discovers a passion for computers and makes the jump to engineering, almost as a way to compliment william's knack for robotics. william hates him because no, why would you do that, you have no idea what i would've give to be allowed to simply do performance arts. he took after his mom, after all. would've been a professional dancer if his dad had allowed it.

but then one day, because they totally hate each other or whatever, and because their final round of finals before graduation are coming up, henry proposes they skip town. they already got all the technical know-how they needed. who needs a flimsy piece of paper to tell them what they achieved over the past four years?

william takes some convincing. there's a bunch of expectations on his shoulders now. fancy degree, a good paying job, a girl to bring home and follow in his father's wretched footsteps. he can't just... drop it all and run for the hills with his not-friend, right? the not-friend who's always covering his meals and getting him nice flamboyant jackets every birthday and christmas (most of them handmade, of course, really high quality stuff).

henry tells him it's better to ask for forgiveness than to ask permission. "just give it a try, man. imagine if we do get successful. imagine we make it." but what convinces william is the fervor with which henry speaks, the way he looks at him, as if it's just them against the world and they're winning the lottery and nothing could ever go wrong so long as they're side by side.

william abandons his father's car in a lot the following week, hitching a ride out west on henry's fancy car. it's a convertible, by the way. cherry red. some of the best memories william has, after it all goes to shit, is of henry lowering the hood in the middle of the night along a long stretch of dusty, deserted highway. a bug flies into his mouth at some point because he was too busy singing along to the 8-track, but the way henry laughed at his sputtering made it all worth it.

he keeps a polaroid from that roadtrip safe in his pocket, even after everything is said and done.

[taddymason]

I saw the post, I have come.

How does Kaida feel about the Ninjas? If she could change anything, what would she change? If she were put in a room with the people she hates most in the world, who would they be and who would get punched in the face first? Does she have a favorite weapon? What story does Jay tell her that she likes the most? What Ninjago holiday does she like the most?

What did Jay hate most about his time in the Administration? Has he ever blamed another agent for something he did? What did Kaida do that made him think "this kid will be the reason for half of my gray hair"? What was it like when he heard Kaida calling him "dad" for the first time?

(WARNING REALLY LONG ANSWERS):

1- For now, her feelings towards them are complicated because she's always seen them as a threat.

When they first came to the Administration they were nothing more than a nuisance, but then they became a potential threat to her and Jay, and she definitely knew that they somehow knew about him. That their meeting had been as disastrous as possible didn't help matters at all because the impression she got from each of them was that they had hurt her family and ran away like it was nothing. Even when she finds out that Jay was actually part of that group, it makes things even worse because she goes from thinking of them as a physical threat to people who could take her only family away from her.

So, at this point in the story, she still has some resentment towards them, but it's more because she has no idea what they're capable of if they ever see it again. Also, something about Ras's words to Jay in chapter 18 "if they really cared about you, they would have found you sooner" doesn't help her view of them either (Ras is obviously trying to manipulate them both but from HER perspective, it's still like they didn't care enough about Jay to find him sooner).

2- Ras. No doubt. The room would have a couple of people from the Administration around and Cinder and Jordana, but Ras would be the first to get stabbed.

3- Her height bs, she would have liked to leave the Administration many years earlier and stop obeying orders before things got worse. and she would definitely change anything to avoid the end of chapter 16

4- If we obviously rule out firearms, it would be her dagger. It matches her fighting style quite well, it's the one she has the most experience with and the most confident with. Since her fighting style is more about taking her opponent by surprise to win quickly than being able to fight for a long time. Although she is very fond of the kusagirama that Jay gave her for her birthday even if she has a hard time using it

5- She always likes to hear about any stupid thing Jay did when he was a kid, but the anecdote about his flying invention is probably the one that entertains her the most.

6- Festival Day, mainly because it was her first real holiday and the most memorable one for her.

7- I think that aside from all the other things that were done during this time, it was probably the constant worry of what could happen to both of them if they screwed things up somehow, if he lost his job, if the Administrator came to think that they weren't indispensable. That added to the general attitude of all the agents, where the only priority was to work and nothing else mattered, it must have been terrible in his first months living there until he could finally adapt.

8- Yeah, and more than once,and somehow he got away with it every time.

9- mmm A lot of things. I have this idea for a "Jay and Kaida's five years in the Administration" one-show where Jay gets really sick, and he should be resting, but he can't afford to rest that much either because the Administration being the Administration. Long story short, Kaida burns down the kitchen trying to cook something for him. Or also on one occasion she uses one of the portals without his permission and almost gets lost until she manages to get back on her own. Suffice it to say that Jay lost years of his life on both occasions.

10- It was probably something like Kaida waking up from a really bad nightmare, crying, not really remembering what she dreamed, not knowing if it was a patrol or a memory from boarding school, calling his name until Jay came to comfort her. And just when she calmed down after a few minutes and he was leaving she would try, unsurely, having thought about whether it was her place to say it many times, wondering if he would mind if she addressed him differently, to whisper "good night, dad", and then pretend to sleep because she would be afraid to see his reaction. Jay would be surprised of course, freezing for a few good minutes, speechless, and then he would say goodbye to her with a broken voice, and I think it would be obvious that he would be trying and failing to keep from crying out of emotion.

[babbletaels]

For some reason I'm kinda obsessed with Wish so here's some theories for you guys.

Magnifico didn't think that Ashas grandfathers wish was dangerous, nor did he not want to grant it due to it not benefitting him. It's a possibility that Magnifico actually just can't grant it.

Every single wish that Magnifico grants in Wish is a wish that has to do with a talent. I know we see a guy with super long hair and Asha sings about going to space and stuff, but I don't think Magnifico can actually grant wishes.

I think Magnifico can give people talents.

This is why he asks Asha about her talent with drawing, and it's why he suggests to her "imagine if someone would wish to be the best apprentice ever" (or whatever, I watched it in my language not english) because he can give her magical powers so she could be his apprentice. He didn't grant someones wish to be the best seamstress, he just gave her the talent to sow. And he gave Simon talents that a knight would have, to grant his wish to be a knight. At the same time he most probably employed both of them in their dream professions.

Since Ashas grandpa didn't wish to be good at something, he didn't wish to be good at playing the guitar but rather he wished he could do something to inspire the next generation, that means magnifico can't grant it. Magnifico can't just poof you wherever you want to be, he can only give you a talent. Think of it like this: what's your dream? Maybe your dream is to be an artist full time, but you're poor and can barely afford to buy paint so you have to work instead. If someone gave you a shitload of money, you would be able to stop working and focus entirely on your dream. That's kinda equal to what magnifico is doing, except everyone in Rosas lives there for free (he doesn't even charge them rent, you guys) so it's more like you have a dream to be idk a great singer but you don't want to go to singing lessons so he can give you a great singing voice. He can give you a talent or enhance your talent. But also he doesn't want you to know this, because then people wouldn't actually wish what they actually desired deep in their heart. A shallow wish isn't as good as your hearts deepest wish obviously.

Kinda lame to only be able to enhance someones already inherent talent though, right? Well you forgot something. Maybe that's why everyone who gives Magnifico their wish forgets what the wish even was. Now they can't pursue the dream on their own, maybe he even took their talent altogether. Now you can't sing or paint anymore. If we say you're an aspiring artist but you can't afford paint, and you get a job but you still can't afford paint or a computer or anything at all, that is actually kinda like society stealing your talent from you. Maybe you even give up on your dream and forget it was ever there, and just hope that one day you will magically feel fulfilled in life. That's kind of like how the people of Rosas feel, they have no ability to actually pursue their dreams other than sitting around and hoping Magnifico will grant their wish one day.

Something that bothered me in the movie is that Asha doesn't actually have a wish, she doesn't seem that into the idea of magic and the only thing we see her doing is obsess over her grandfathers wish being granted. But I have another theory for you!

Ashas wish was for her father to get better, to not be sick anymore. But he died, so her wish was crushed. Ever since then, she has been obsessed with helping others make their dreams come true, that's why she thinks it's unfair that not everyone can get their wish granted, because hers wasn't. That's why she especially wants her grandfathers wish to be granted, because he reminds her of her dad.

So when Asha sings "I want something more for us than this", her great wish that is granted by a star... What she is actually wishing is that everyones wishes could be granted. She wants something more for them than this is a really bad way of phrasing it and extremely vague, and maybe they could've shown why Asha is so disturbed by the wishes not being granted before showing us her wish that is so great that a star comes down from the sky. Her wish is vague because maybe she doesn't really know what she wants either since her true wish was crushed.

See, this movie is starting to make a little bit more sense now, isn't it?

Okay one last theory. This one is a bit more speculative. But on the topic of crushing someones dreams..

Magnificos wish was to get his family back.

Maybe once upon a time, Magnifico saw someone who claimed they had gotten a wish granted by wishing at a star. Magnifico wasn't a magician when he was younger. Then his family died, and Magnifico wished at the stars to get them back, and it didn't work. He was still just a kid, an orphan, and he started learning magic in order to grant his own wish, not realizing that it was impossible to grant such a wish. His dreams/wish was crushed when he realized, but he realized he could grant other peoples wishes, and then realized that something about having another persons wish made him feel.. more whole? Maybe that's why he started hoarding peoples wishes. And he IS keeping them safe from being crushed.. and he IS taking peoples worries away. Imagine your greatest wish, your dream in life, being something that actually can't ever be fulfilled, like maybe your big dream that makes you who you are is that, like Asha, your father was still alive. That would hurt. And Magnifico can make you forget about that being your wish. Magnifico likes having control over the wishes because he didn't have control over his own wish.

So the conflict in this movie is between two people who went through the same thing, but have different opinions on how to fix the situation. Magnifico wants to keep the wishes safe and the people happy in blissful ignorance because he couldn't grant his own wish of getting his family back, while Asha's loss of her father caused her to want everyone to have a chance to get their wishes granted. Wait let me make it clearer. Magnifico thinks it's better if people don't experience grief at all, even if it means they will never achieve their dream. Asha believes grief is worth it just to have a chance at achieving your dreams.

Idk. Anyway that's all I had for you today

No wait.

Let's talk about you being a star... What does that even mean? Well, you wish upon a star and your dreams come true. You're a star means you can make your dreams come true. Only a star can fulfill your wish and you are one. It's entirely a metaphor. Though it is a metaphor with.... very dire consequences for the lore. Like so is everyone born from a wish? Did someone wish to have a child and a star had to come down to earth and be born as a child, and that's how people became stars? I don't know. What if.. A star that stays on earth for too long simply turns into a human? Idk this metaphor should've kinda stayed a metaphor but it didn't so here we are....

Wait if only a star can grant wishes does that mean Magnifico is a star? When you take a wish away from a human does that turn them into fully a human? if you're a star so you can fulfill your own wish, why did a star respond when Asha wished? Is Asha not a star anymore because her wish was destroyed?

Ok now I'm done.

Wait also if everyones deepest wish is a star that's why when people die in disney movies they become stars, that's pretty neat

Ok I'm gonna stop now

[alittlextrathatway]

Line: "And I'm highly suspicious that everyone who sees you wants you." Location: supermarket

High School AU time again.

You can find parts 1 & 2: here and here

***

Matt had a very different plan for Homecoming.

Nice suit, fancy dinner, dancing, Severide's after party...

But then he pulled a bonehead move and forgot to pick up his dad's old suit from the cleaners where his sister had helped him arrange and pay for alterations. If it were up to him, he wouldn't touch anything that used to be his dad's. As much as losing him threw Matt's life into upheaval and deprived him of any hope of repairing their relationship someday, he knows he's better off without him. However, he can't afford a new suit so his only option, apart from just not going, is to repurpose something of his dad's. Or at least it was.

Now, he's screwed.

He calls Sylvie as he gets back into his car, staring mournfully at the dark storefront. He's such an idiot.

"Hey! Everything okay?"

"No. I'm a moron."

"I very much doubt that."

"Yeah, hold that thought till after I tell you what's happened."

He recounts the story of agreeing to work for a friend of his mom's who runs a construction business and of how the job ran later than expected. He was in such a rush to leave that he forgot he still needed to pick up his dress clothes until he was stepping out of the shower. And by then the cleaners had already been closed for 10 minutes.

"I don't have any thing I can wear instead. Not to a dance. Not when you've probably got a beautiful dress picked out -- If I show up in slacks and a polo I'd embarrass the hell out of you."

"You wouldn't," Sylvie assures him. "At last year's Homecoming in Fowlerton my ex boyfriend wore jeans and a cowboy hat. I don't mind farmer wear on a daily basis but to a dance? I wanted to throttle him. Slacks and a polo would be perfectly acceptable to me."

He starts to think maybe he didn't ruin her first school dance in Chicago until she finishes her thought.

"But unfortunately the school dress code for the dance isn't quite so flexible."

Shit. He forgot about the school dress code. Even if he did work something out, they wouldn't let him in.

"Dammit, you're right. I'm so sorry, Sylvie. This is not how I wanted our first date to go. Maybe we can try again some other night?"

"Try again?" She asks, sounding appalled at the suggestion. "You're not getting out of tonight that easily, Matt Casey. Pick me up at 7 and wear slacks and a polo just like we talked about. I have an idea."

"Are you sure?"

"Positive. Just because we can't go to the dance doesn't mean we can't hang out."

He shows up two hours later with a small bouquet of flowers and another apology ready to go, but his mind goes instantly blank when Sylvie answers the door in her Homecoming dress. It's a satin baby blue dress that matches the exact shade of her eyes. The top scoops, but is too high to be considered anything but modest and the front of the skirt skims the tops of her knees and then lengthens at the back. The fabric flows in a way that makes him think of a waterfall, gorgeous and serene. He's at a loss for any substantial words.

"Uh, wow. Hi."

She giggles and blushes, glancing down at her strappy silver heels. "Hi. Let me get my coat and we can go."

As she turns to head back inside he gets a glimpse of the back of the dress. It ties across her back in a wide bow and then leaves three inches of her skin exposed above the waistline of the skirt.

Yeah, a coat. She needs a coat. The urge to touch that little bit of smooth skin is going to take all the self control he has. She comes back with a black peacoat. It's on but open, the buttons undone and the sash untied.

She grabs his hand as she passes him and drags him down he hall toward her building's elevator. "Let's go before my mom forces us to take a million pictures."

They make it down to his truck very clumsily. Sylvie tripped over her shoes one or two times. Lucky for them both, Matt's got fast reflexes and caught her arm both times. They're laughing as he holds open his passenger door for her and offers his hand to help her climb in. Once she's settled he closes the door and hops in himself.

"So, what's the plan, boss?" Matt asks as he starts his truck.

"Oh, boss. I like that," Sylvie says with a smirk.

That smirk makes him want to lean across the middle console and kiss her, but he holds off. He'll wait for her to give him the green light.

"Head to the supermarket around the corner," Sylvie instructs.

"Supermarket?" Matt asks with a furrowed brow.

"Trust me."

He drives around the corner and parallel parks. As he parks, the reason Sylvie directed them here becomes clear. It's one of those markets with a salad bar and a hot buffet. Everything is fresh and affordable and can be packed up to go. "We're having supermarket hot wings?"

She laughs and nods. "Sure, if you want. I thought we'd pick up food here and then go have a picnic on the football field. No one will be there and we'll even be able to hear the DJ they hired for the dance. It'll be like our own private Homecoming celebration."

Oh, that's perfect, actually. Of course she'd think of that. She's brilliant. "That sounds like the best idea I've heard all day."

They get out and walk toward the supermarket. Sylvie grabs his hand as they pass through the automatic doors. He adjusts their hands to tangle their fingers together. The smile she points at him afterward is nothing short of radiant.

They each pick out an entree, a side, and a drink and head to the registers. The meal is easily more affordable than the fancy dinner he assumed he would need to treat her to and Sylvie seems just as excited about this food as she would about anything else.

She leans toward him to speak in a low voice as they wait their turn in line. "This chicken salad is amazing. I've been dreaming about it all week."

When they reach the cashier, Matt waves. They had English together last year. It must suck to have to work the night of the dance. "Hey, Naomi."

She smiles sweetly at him, flicking her hair over her shoulder. "Matt, hi! I thought you'd be at the dance. What are you doing here?"

"We're on our way there," he replies. It's not technically a lie. They are going to the school after all. "But my date," he says nodding toward Sylvie and pointing a teasing grin at her. "Just had to have some of this chicken salad so here we are."

"Date?" Naomi asks, eyes widening with curiosity. "I just assumed you'd be going with Gabby again."

"Ah, no, Gabby and I broke up last year." He distracts himself from the interest in Naomi's stare and the awkward question by pulling his wallet out of his back pocket. He nods to Sylvie again. "Have you met Sylvie Brett? She just started at our school this year."

Sylvie smiles but Matt can tell it's forced. Naomi skims a gaze over Sylvie but seems unimpressed. "I wish I'd known you were available. I've got to find better sources for my gossip."

"Yeah, okay," Matt says with a wince. "Can you ring us up? We're sort of eager to get going."

The smile on Sylvie's face doesn't waiver but he can see her eyes narrowing every so slightly. "By the way," she says, in a firm yet overly polite voice. "He's not."

"Not what?" Naomi asks as she turns her attention to the register and rings up their items.

"Available."

Matt should be offended that Sylvie's speaking for him. He used to hate it when Gabby did that and she did it a lot. But this moment with Sylvie is different. He's too thrilled to hear her claim him to care that she hasn't run it by him first.

That one word grabs Naomi's attention. She quirks a brow at Sylvie but otherwise ignores her, choosing to tell Matt his total instead. He pays, grabs Sylvie's hand, and leads them outside.

"Oh my god," Sylvie says, closing her eyes and hiding her face in his shoulder. "I can't believe I just did that. I am so sorry."

"Sylvie, really, it's fine--"

"No, I shouldn't have said that without talking to you about it first. Just because we're going on one date doesn't mean that you want everyone to think you're taken or that we're an item or something and I just went and blabbed that we are to -- whoever the heck that was. She was just so rude and blatantly checking you out right in front of me! It made me so mad and-- and--"

"Jealous?" He suggests, interrupting her with a mirthful smirk.

"Do not let that go to your head," she warns, her face flushing in embarrassment.

"Too late," he replies, taking her food from her and setting both their meals on the hood of his car. "Sylvie Brett just told the biggest gossip in school that I'm hers. If anything's gonna puff up my ego, it's that. Next time Sheffield comes sniffing around I'll be sure to tell him you're unavailable too. Truthfully, I can't wait. Maybe we'll run into him tonight."

"Wait, hold on," Sylvie says, stepping closer to him. "You're happy I basically told her you're mine like a jealous girlfriend?"

He shrugs, barely withholding a gleeful smile. "Like you said, she was rude. Naomi kinda deserved it. Plus, what if I told you I want you to be my girlfriend?"

Her confusion melts into elation. "You do?"

"More than anything."

She laughs and then bounces up onto her toes, grabbing his face and bringing his lips down to hers. It's a quick, excited kiss. Passionate but over much too soon. He responds by wrapping his arms around her waist and pulling her against him, resting his forehead on hers.

"Is that a yes?"

"That's a hell yes," Sylvie says, wrapping her arms around his neck.

"Thank God," Matt says before he swoops in for another kiss. This one is deeper and longer and far more exploratory. Kissing Sylvie Brett is already one of his favorite memories and it's not even over yet. Nor will this be the last time he kisses her. No, he plans to keep coming back for more for as long as he can.

He never saw the new girl coming. She's flipped everything he thought he knew upside down and he's glad she did. His world needed a little shaking up. Thank God it was Sylvie that did the shaking. He doesn't want to imagine how his senior year would have started without her.

[kringletheelf04]

Dad is late and Laura wants to make my life hell (chapter 1)

Ever since I could remember I've had the name Bernard practically engraved onto my wrist. Elegant strokes had seemed to dance joyfully across my skin, silver glittery writing that practically glows. I've never met anyone with only a first name. In fact I've never met anyone with a tattoo on them since birth.

Today was Christmas Eve and Laura was dropping Charlie off at me and dads house. Neil, his stepdad, decided to drive them there.

I see them pull into the driveway and open the door wide as Charlie runs to me with open arms. I pick him up and spin around once and set him back down as he giggles. I stand back up and hug Laura .

"I see your father couldn't even be here to greet Charlie. Not that I'm surprised." Laura snarks.

"He just got caught up at work for a little more than he thought. He called me and said he'll be here within the hour." I retort.

Even if she is my step mom she doesn't deserve to be able to talk shit about dad. He's never been the same since their divorce. My mom died when I was around 11. It was on Christmas Day that she died and I've never liked it since. I remember asking Santa to have her survive that year. I had rushed down the stairs hoping to see my mom and dad on the couch, mom checked out from the hospital and all better. Instead I got a dad with glassy eyes and every present I had ever wanted over the years, but no mom. Ever since then I stopped believing in Santa and the whole Christmas shtick. I'm now 22 and work as a baker living in my childhood home with my dad. He could never do it alone and I could never imagine what he would do alone. He's planning to make Christmas dinner so I've already made a reservation for Dennys seeing as it's the only thing open late on Christmas Eve. As I was silently praying that I don't have to spend any more time than necessary with this woman Charlie's voice breaks my concentration on keeping a fake smile on.

"There's not any Christmas lights outside sissy! Can we put some up to surprise dad when he comes home?!" Charlie pleads with the biggest puppy eyes he could muster.

Sighing I nod and kiss his head.

"Sure bud but I'm gonna have to get them from the attic so stay here in the living room until I get back."

He nods his little head and pulls his mom onto the couch where he sits.

I trudge up the stairs to the attic and open the pull latter. All are Christmas decor is still in boxes because dad knows it's a sore subject. But I'd probably kill someone if Charlie asked. So I suffer bringing down the cardboard box labeled *X-MAS LIGHTS*. I make my way back down to the living room and Laura has this annoyed look on her face. As if I'm not fit to watch my brother even though I'm 22. I literally have a successful bakery in downtown Chicago for christs sake!

Charlie notices my presence and runs over to me with the biggest grin he could muster.

"Sissy (y/n)! Let's go decorate the house!" He gently pulls on my sweater sleeve as he guide me out the door. Laura gets up with crossed arms and follows us out.

"So (y/n), you ever get that little idea of yours off the ground? Because if not I'm sure your dad can give you a job scrubbing toilets at his company." Laura asks rather smugly.

Oh how I hate that bitch. I force a smile on my face and turn to her.

"Actually I have a shop in downtown Chicago on Michigan avenue. Thanks for asking Laura!" I rub in her face and get back to lifting Charlie into the air to put the lights on the roof.

"Well how do you afford that. I mean you can't be making that much money off of cookies alone. Are you running a drug ring in the back?" Laura whispers the last bit into my ear as to block Charlie from hearing it.

I bite my lip and take a deep breath before setting Charlie back down and turning to her.

"Charlie it's getting a little cold, why don't you run along inside and I'll be inside in a minute." I smile at him.

"Ok sissy (y/n)!" Charlie skips inside shutting the door behind him.

"How dare you. I've been very cordial seeing as your a massive bitch and all you can say is that I have got to be a drug dealer because I'm making enough money to afford my dream." I snap at her.

Looking dumbfounded she begins sputtering as dad rolls into the driveway.

"Hey guys! Sorry I'm late. Hope I haven't kept you waiting to long!" Dad smiles at us not realizing how tense things just were.

"There's Christmas lights up!

(y/n), I didn't think you wanted them up this year." Dad looks at me confused

"Charlie wanted to surprise you. You know I can't say no to his little face!" I defend myself laughing a bit.

"Your daughter just called me a bitch just so you know Scott." Laura tells dad.

Dad frowns at me "(y/n), now why would do that? All she did was drop Charlie off."

"She said that I was a drug dealer!" I defend myself.

"I did no such thing!" Laura lies.

"(y/n) apologize to your stepmom now!" Dad practically seethes.

"That's bullshit and you know it. She's lying. And she's not even my stepmom anymore!" I turn and go into the house slamming the door behind me.

"Why do you and mom always have to fight?" Charlie surprises me by popping up in front of me.

"We weren't fighting sport. We were singing! But your moms singing kinda sounds like cats fighting. So that's what you heard honey!" I try to reassure him. I don't think he buys it but doesn't ask further.

Dad soon comes inside and Charlie rushes over to him. Dad whisks him into his arms.

"Why are there no presents under the tree?" Charlie asks dad.

"Well Santa has to come yet buddy!" I reassure him.

"Neil and mom said that Santa's not real. Believing is for babies!" Charlie shakes his head.

Of course the fucking did. Can't the kid enjoy anything?

"Well I believe in Santa and I'm not a baby." Dad tells him, hoping to save the spirit. I quickly agree "I agree and I'm not a baby either!"

"Well sport! I'm gonna start on our delicious Christmas turkey!" Dad strides into the kitchen.

"So we have to eat it? Can't we go out to eat sissy (y/n)?" Charlie whisper asks to me.

"Don't worry sport. I already called Dennys and made a reservation for 8." I encourage him.

"But I don't like Dennys!" Charlie cries.

"I know but it's the only thing that's open on Christmas sport!" I disclose to him.

*TIME SKIP BROUGHT TO YOU BY BURNT TURKEY*

Smoke billows out of the kitchen entrance. It envelopes dad and his extinguisher as he fights the fire. Charlie and I are sitting at the dining table and I give him a knowing look.

"Dad, let's just go to Dennys. I already called them so I know they're open." I call out into the smoke.

Dad steps from the smoke with ash covering him from just about head to toe.

"Yeah. I guess that's okay. I really wanted to make Christmas special for you again but looks like I failed again." He glumly agrees.

"You didn't fail anything. We are here as a family and that's all I could ever want!" I say as my eyes water, somewhat from the smoke and somewhat from the sentiment.

I pick up Charlie and we both hug dad, not caring to get dirty.

"Come on guys! Let's have a Christmas dinner at Dennys. It's an American institution!" Dad scoots is out as we put on our winter coats and scarves.

We load into the car and buckle up. Soon we are at Dennys.

"Are you with Hatsutashi?" The lady with a name tag reading (JUDY) asked us.

Dad starts to open his mouth but I cut him off.

"No actually I made a reservation earlier under Calvin." I inform her.

"Party of three," she begins pulling out the menus, " follow me" she says beckoning us to the right side of the resultant into a booth.

We sit down and dad starts to order egg nog as Charlie sits with a disgusted look on his face.

"We're out." Judy says flatly.

"I guess we will take coffee, decaf though please. And he'll take a chocolate milk please." I tell her.

"We're out."

"Plain milk's fine then!" I tell her and she walks away.

"At least we know they got hot apple pie." Dad tries to lighten the mood.

Judy shouts from somewhere behind the counter "We did".

This is just great!

[his-tamine]

life update :3 (a little vent-y)

sooo, been over 200 days since the house caught fire and we had to move. obviously, a lot of stuff's been happening. can't go into deep details for fear of someone I don't want to find this, finding this, but I'll say this much: FUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I've very rarely mentioned family on here (for obvious reasons - this account is NOT made for that lol) but here goes. tw for pretty heavy topics: mentions of abuse, father issues, health issues, transphobia & financial issues. I turned 18 Feb 21st, literally just almost 2 months before the damn house caught fire. Meanwhile, my brother's still a minor. MEANING, I narrowly escaped the custody battle my mom & dad are in. But unfortunately, he's still stuck in the middle of it. :( My pops was not really the nicest person to me when I was a kid -

whooping my ass whenever I did anything wrong, no matter how minor the offense was.

Telling me that he loved God more than he loved me, because "You're God's gift to me. God is the one who gave you to me in the first place," when I was four.

Telling me that if I didn't start being ok with receiving physical affection from family - which he knew made me uncomfortable - I was "going to grow up to be a S3R1AL K1LL3R" (yes he said that.)

Telling me that "God doesn't make mistakes," and that he "made me into a beautiful young woman for a reason" after I came out to him personally at 14 - big mistake 0/10 stars, would never do again. You get the idea. And those are the tame examples I could think of. So, I finally cut him off. As soon as my mom, brother, & I were in our new place, I blocked his number and haven't talked to him since. I was sick of him not respecting my boundaries, and repeatedly demonstrating that he thought of me as nothing more than a possession. Tired of him making me feel crazy all the time too. But now he's fucking with my mom & brother. Intentionally not paying child support till the last minute possible - & then making it in as small of payments at a time as he possibly can (yes he can afford it btw.) Trying to force my brother to go over to his place, even when my brother does NOT want to - which has begun giving my brother psychological issues & issues with school, mirroring the ones I used to struggle with bc of that bastard. My mom is juggling all sorts of things, & I really at least wanna try to help financially by getting a job, but I can't yet because: she says that I'm only 18, & shouldn't have to get a job to help out (I disagree.) I don't have an ID bc she wants me to wait on my legal name change - which costs a pretty decent chunk of change - reason is bc she "wants me to have as easy an early adulthood life as possible" (love her.) AND, I haven't actually graduated - No, I dipped in 11th bc school was hell (not exaggerating,) & instead just decided to pursue a GED, that I haven't been able to work towards bc of the shit show that is life in midwestern america. So I've been very depressed, exhausted, & hopeless. The least I can do is clean up our house while she's at work, & get this - some days I don't even have the physical energy to do THAT! I do not know what the hell is wrong with my body currently, but it absolutely sucks. & I'm really tired of just taking up space all the time. She's dealing with health issues too, & I'm always worried ab her. Idk what the hell to do, but something's gotta give. Everybody needs a fucking break. I keep trying to shoo away all the dark thoughts, push myself as often as possible, & keep my fingers crossed, but jfc... Sorry just needed to yell into the void for a sec. I'll live, I'm sure - I've survived worse. Sometimes things just suck. But I like to think that someday they won't. :,)

[tachyon-omlette]

so our hvac is fucking dying [ISSUE RESOLVED]

leaving this up for posterity but putting everything under a readmore. thank you to those who helped out

in truth the entire thing has needed replacing for some time but we (my mom & I) can't even afford to get it serviced currently. I've been trying to find some alternative means of funding to avoid ebegging but the situation is getting to a breaking point & might end up with us not having heating during the winter either

a patch job that'll last the rest of the year (which we had done last year) would take about $780. though the patch job from last year only lasted for so long, it'll at least allow us to sleep through the rest of this year's godforsaken heat (& it'd be around/over $10k to get a new ac entirely - which, again, is money we don't have)

my p*yp*l is @tachyonomlette - anything helps but if you'd like an incentive I'll do full-color half-body comms (no nsfw or hateful themes) for $35 each. any hate will be removed/blocked. thank you for your time

(more thorough explanation of the situation under the cut)

[original readmore]

we've had to set the ac well above 90F every day in order to prevent it running 24/7 bc it's physically incapable of cooling the house & even by opening the windows and buying portable mini air coolers (which is all we can afford) we're having problems sleeping & being functional during the day bc we can't get the house cool enough at night either. AND the control panel just shat itself so the ac is stuck on 95F (though it might just need a new battery. hopefully). the heat in the house is ALSO overtaxing our refrigerator, which is ALSO outdated & on the verge of failing if we aren't careful

my mom can barely afford to pay every other expense we have to deal with & I'm not in a position where I can get a job right now. normally my dad (who doesn't live with us) would cover part of the expenses but this year he isn't even willing to help with the district taxes let alone maintenance issues, so we're a little bit in a rough spot rn

[paragonrobits]

so some unhappy news; apparently my living situation is abruptly WAY more uncertain than I thought.

A couple days ago, after spending thanksgiving at my dad's place, he apparently messaged my brother and told him that he and his wife (who have been married for quite a long time, since I was living on the street with my mom) are getting a divorce and they can't afford to pay for our apartment, which until this point had been mostly paid for by my monthly income plus a few hundred dollars from them. Evidentally they can't or won't make our rent payment for next month; at the moment its still unclear.

He's telling my brother to get a job, and my brother is trying to explain to him that he has been trying but even if he got one right now he wouldn't get a paycheck in time to make rent.

So, that's the broad strokes. Some more specific wrinkles are here.

Right before we left, we spent about a night with them and things were fine. No one was arguing and things were perfectly okay, so I have no idea why this suddenly came up. Indeed, the previous night my dad's wife was talking to my brother about how they could only afford to pay until May of next year, which was simply went the lease ended and I have NO IDEA what is going on. Did things abruptly change over the SINGLE NIGHT since then??

We're not sure if this is genuine or if they're just trying to do scare tactics to spook my brother into job hunting and take up a job that he really doesn't want to do or is mentally distressing for him. For what its worth I've seen posts on my dad's facebook about feeling alone so it probably IS genuine, to some degree, but he's not answering any comments and is being frustratingly vague.

My brother made a facebook post mentioning the situation (though not the divorce) in vague terms and asked for help from family to host us. My dad immediately asked him to take it down and just said 'we'll discuss it later' so I have no idea what's going on. I'm ASSUMING he'll make some kind of arrangement but in the short term i have no idea what's going on or what we will end up doing. Mostly I'm just getting extremely incensed about him not saying anything until the last minute, as its the 26th as I write this and rent is due on the 1st or 3rd of the month (probably the 1st).

I think my best chance in the short term is first trying to find a friend of my brother's or family willing to at least hold onto our stuff, since we recently got more of our stuff in here right before this went down and we need some place to store it all. Then we need to find family to host us for the interim and figure things out from there, and it would probably be a good idea to get onto Section 8 for the time being, though that will take time to process if they even accept me, let alone my brother as well.

Mostly worried about my cat. While I am greatly concerned for my computer, which was a gift from my brother's friend I cannot replace (both of our computers were made with high grade things that we certainly couldn't get for ourselves) but while we can't carry them around with us, it shouldn't be hard to find someone to hold onto them for us. I'm more concerned about my cat's well being, since I refuse to be separated from her or given the choice of surrendering her. I'm more concerned for her than anything else.

Mostly just. What the fuck. Everything seemed fine before we left; no one was arguing, everyone was getting along, my dad's step-kids are all there and dependent on him (my oldest step-brother's wife is due to have a baby some time this coming month) and I don't have any idea why they're planning on separating. Just. WHAT THE FUCK.

If this is an elaborate mind game I am going to be pissed, if you wanted to tell my brother that you can't afford to keep paying for this apartment that's fine, just SAY SO. If its not then they're making some incredibly awful life decisions impacting other people.

if I'm not being particularly chatty for a while this is the reason why, things are getting complicated!!

[stellocchia]

I got inspired to make a 2012TMNT Spiderverse AU by a Rise AU my friend @alwerakoo made, so here we go. It will be a bit disjointed because it's copy pasted from Discord.

This was born fron the idea that all of them lost one of their brothers as their origin story. Aside from Leo who is our Miles Morales pretty much.

Leo got bit by a radioactive spider only very very recently. My man almost immediately gets dragged into the life by the old Spiderman (the Splinter of this Au) only to see him get murdered almost immediately by the Shredder (pretty much the King Pin of this universe).

In his universe Splinter wasn't their dad. Leo and his brothers are just sort of living on their own. They're supposed to be in the foster system, but Donnie managed to find them a place on their own thanks to the help of his bestie April. Officially, they're under the legal charge of April's dad, but he can't really afford to support them so they're making do on their own.

They can afford it a bit thanks to Donnie's scholarship, a bit thanks to Mikey's job as a cook at a pizza shop, and a bit thanks to Raph's job at the car repair job (he mostly does the car paint job). Leo always felt kinda like the useless one, and getting bit was about the worst and the best thing that could happen to him. Because now he has even more pressure on him to succeed, but at least he can help people in his own way.

---

In the spidey!Raph universe he was bitten when he was out on a walk with Leo. Leo was also the only one that knew. Being twins they were always the closest. And, honestly, Leo took it far more seriously than Raph. At least at the beginning. You probably can see where I'm going with this.

Leo was kidnapped by a criminal to use him as leverage against Raph. In the struggle that ensued Raph wasn't able to save Leo. So now he pretty much shut himself off from the rest of his family to try and protect them.

---

In the Spider!Donnie universe, Donnie was actually the one who made the spider that bit him. He was helping a professor at the University he got to attend earlier with his project and it backfired.

Btw, it later turned out that the professor was Baxter Stockman. Because I like to keep some parts of the show and he's making mutagen for Shredder in this one too. Because it just makes sense.

Of course, accidentally working for a supervillain doesn't end well. And Mikey ends up getting caught in the crossfire. He goes to try and find Donnie and finds him being strapped to a chair by Baxter who is studying him. Mikey manages to free him, but he gets stabbed by Shredder who came in at that point.

---

In the spider!Mikey universe he was delivering pizza at Baxter's lab when he got bitten. Because even evil scientists need to eat.

He did not figure out anything was wrong until a few weeks later because his fingers are always sticky anyway and he thought the Spidey senses were just Raph's paranoia rubbing off on him.

Until he gets to meet one of his idols, Chris Bradford (secretly the villain Rahzar). Raph didn't fucking trust the intentions of the dude so he followed them. And he was right, because the dude just wanted to get the spider they think was stolen by Mikey back from him. Raph catches onto it and bursts in to get his brother back. Only to, you know, get stabbed because he's a normal civilian and not a fucking super human. Mikey manages to swing them out of there with his spider webs (because he actually produces his own) but Raph dies in the hospital. So Mikey is stuck with the guilt of having gotten his brother killed (not really, but Raph warned him not to go and he did anyway so he still feels guilty about his death) and powers he has no clue what to do with and way too many responsibilities.

---

Some more fun facts about this AU:

Mikey is the only one of the spidey!brothers that can produce his own spiderwebs biologically. The others had to create their own or, in Raph's case, steal a prototype Donnie made and act as if nothing happened.

Leo has special healing hands powers on top of the typical Spidey powers. Both because canon and because he's the Miles of this universe so he gets extra powers.

Raph is the one who has been Spiderman the longest. Leo has been dead for years now. They were in middle school when he got bitten.

In every universe aside from the Spidey Leo universe, Splinter is their dad. But in the Spidey Donnie universe they're very very distant. Splinter was a very strict dad there and both the Leo and the Raph of that universe pretty much ignored their younger siblings to try and chase his approval (in Leo's case) or get attention from him by misbehaving (in Raph's) which is why Mikey was the only one who noticed that Donnie hadn't come back the day he got bit.

Splinter is a great dad in both the Spidey Mikey and Spidey Raph universe. In the Mikey universe he actually knows about Mikey being Spiderman and trains him so he can be as safe as possible. In Raph's universe he tries his best to care for them, but Raph is shutting him out. Splinter tried giving him space at the start because he thought he just needed time to grieve, but after years he's just desperately trying to get him to a psychologist.

---

During the actual movie plot kinda thing spidey!Raph would have Peter B's role from the first movie with spidey!Leo. Both because he's the one with the most experience and generally more disillusioned. But also because that's his dearest brother he fucking lost, so he's already attached from the get go.

And being around Spidey!Leo is what makes him finally reconnect with his family.

Also thinking to maybe make Raph university aged because the idea of him having already moved out and having cut contact only to show up back in front of his family's house under the rain crying after the movie like "Dad I'm home" and having Splinter hug him so tight they can barely breathe but neither cares is just hhhhhhhhhh.

---

Also, I wanted to talk about who knows my boys secret identity in their universes.

In the Spidey!Raph one obviously Leo knew before dying. Mikey and Splinter are completely oblivious. Donnie doesn't know for certain, but he does suspect that one of his family members is Spiderman, which is why he keeps making spider themed gadgets and "forgetting about them" in corners of his room. He never tried to figure out who it actually was though.

In the Spidey!Mikey universe literally everyone knows. The only one who didn't have a chance to learn about it was Raph who died before he could. Splinter was the first one to learn about his powers when Mikey called him from the hospital where he brought Raph in the middle of a mental breakdown while ugly sobbing. The others know too though, as Splinter is training them as well so they won't have another death in the family, because Raph's loss left them all pretty fucking messed up.

In the Spidey!Donnie universe no one from his family knows. Donnie went no contact with the rest of his family after Mikey's death, he felt like they never cared anyway. (They did, but love isn't always enough to keep a relationship going). He also dropped out of university after the whole "incident" with Baxter and made himself a little apartment in the sewers which he uses as his headquarters. At the very least though, he did get to meet April and Casey, and both of them know and help him. Casey is properly his sidekick and works on the field alongside him, while April is basically their person in the chair. There is no love triangle here, they're all in a poly relationship, but Casey and Donnie still keep up the banter they have in canon. Chosen family for the purple boy!

---

I have also thought about what costumes they would wear (and borrowed ideas from actual canon Spiderman costumes I could find), so here they are:

Raph wears something like this:

Big ass hoodie over the all red suit from one of his exes (probably Slash, let's be real). Plenty of pockets in it to stash all the random gadgets Donnie creates and then promptly "forgets" about in a dark corner of his room.

It's comfy and practical.

Also, he wears normal ass jeans underneath. He looks a bit like Peter B. because it fits him.

Mikey gets this cool ass design:

Offers way more protection than Raphs as it's a proper combat suit. It was designed by his dad based on old combat uniforms he studied. He also wanted to make it completely black so that Mikey could blend into the night perfectly, but Mikey was not willing to compromise his sunshine aesthetic quite that much!

The headwear is a proper helmet from a motorbike that Mikey painted on. It hurts like a bitch when he headbutts you.

Donnie gets something like this, but with the spider glowing bright purple instead:

Fully designed by him. Hypertechnologic. There is an AI system inside. It works similarly to one of the suits Peter used in the movies, the one Mr. Stark designed.

He's silent as fuck and can dim the glowing of the spider how much he wants. Nobody ever sees him coming. He also has methallic spider legs that can pop up from the back. And plenty of vials of chemicals he worked on hanging from a belt. Everything either made by him on his own, or with April's help.

Leo at the start only has a hoodie, some goggles and a normal ass medical face mask. There is nothing to indicate that he's part of the Spidey brand. The only Spidey thing he gets are the web shooters he inherits from dead Splinter.

But later on he gets something more classic with the red and blue motif. But he takes the comfy approach Raph went for (that is his mentor after all) which includes the oversized hoodie. Basically something like this:

Also, his suit is a two piece. The top part with the mask and hoodie (they're all in one) and the bottom part with some tight blue gym pants that he got his actual Raph (the one from his dimension) to decorate for him.

---

Lastly, here's the ages for all the boys in every universe:

s!Leo universe:

Donnie is 19 (just started uni)

Raph is 18

Mikey is 15

Leo is 14 (I need more youngest Leo in my life)

.

s!Donnie universe:

Leo is 22

Raph is 21

Donnie is 20 (has been Spiderman for 2 years)

Mikey was 16 when he died, would be 18 now

.

s!Mikey universe:

Raph was 17 when he died (would be 18 now)

Mikey 17 (has been Spiderman for 1 year)

Donnie and Leo are 14

.

s!Raph universe:

Raph is 24 (has been Spiderman for 11 years)

Leo was 13 when he died, would be 24 now as well

Mikey is 22

Donnie is 19

[snootlestheangel]

Can we get more bout Truck please

I love all your OCs dude they are the best

This honestly took so long at first, but I am really excited to share this! Truck is my big boy!

I'm gonna break this up actually, cause his backstory got way out of hand from my original thing so I'm gonna do a quick physical description/some of his little quirks before I get into the mess of his life!

He's probably like 42 in my head, so old compared to most of the Shadows but close to Graves's age. Around 5'8", broad build, an absolute unit of a man, hooked nose that has been very clearly broken several times, left ear is a cauliflower ear from a fight he got into as a teen, green eyes, looks angry all the time, has so many callouses on his hands and knuckles, so many scars from fights on his face. Those are little scars, but they're still there. GINGER TRUCK!! He so ginger in my head now and it makes me so happy!

Family: Momma is still alive, and he calls/writes her regularly, visits when he can. Pops died not long after he joined, which hurt like hell but he stayed on his course. His family supported him the whole way through. He's got two sisters, both younger, and he'd commit some pretty bad war crimes if anything bad ever happened to either of them. Surprisingly, he's married. He loves his wife but never talks about her; his life is his and not anyone else's. They don't have kids (yet? can't decide if I want him to have kids or not) but they do have 2 shelter dogs they adopted, and they're the cutest freaking things.

Hates anything carbonated, like sodas and stuff. Either drinks water with a little bit of lemon in it or straight black coffee. Doesn't do sweets (unlike Ness and Flash who live off of sweet stuff). Generally keeps a really good diet and workout routine when he's not in his shop. Such a routine oriented guy that it could only take 2 days to learn his full routine. Day two is just to verify everything.

As I've said before, he struggled a lot in school. It wasn't just his dyslexia (that he didn't know he has until sometime after joining); it was his anger issues. He was constantly getting into fights as a teenager. He had been bullied a lot as a kid. He's a ginger, so already was an easy target for bullying, but then you add that he was really poor compared to a lot of kids in the area, and he just became prime bully real estate. That is until he hit puberty and got tougher and stronger. Then he became a bully to his bullies.

He had to pick up a job in high school to afford lunch, and life was just really difficult in general for him. His parents were incredible people, he still has such a great relationship with his momma, but it doesn't change how difficult life had been for him.

His Pops taking him under his wing and teaching him mechanic things was a huge respite from all the icky stuff life threw at him. He got to spend quality time with his dad, which he rarely got to do as a kid cause of how much the man worked. He got to learn in a way that didn't stress him out and make his head hurt. He got to do things and sometimes his strength was necessary to get something fixed. The mechanic shop and the time with Pops probably saved Truck from getting into much more serious trouble as a teenager, so he feels he owes his Pops his life.

He has a lot of ways to cope with his anger issues that don't lead to either self destruction or hurting others. It's actually why he joined the military in the first place. He was once told by a really horrible teacher that if he didn't "shape up and start acting right" then he'd get shipped off to the army and they'd set him right. It was meant to be demeaning, kind of a way for the teacher to tell him that he's too stupid for the real world, the only people that would take him is the army. But for Truck? Free food, free housing, free education (should he want to try his luck at that again), a lot of benefits like insurance and stuff? Hell, decent pay??? Sign him the fuck up!

Not to mention, he wanted the military to shape him up, to make him "act right". You think other people don't like dealing with his anger issues? He loathes his anger issues. It cost him a lot of good friends and ruined trust with a lot of people cause he'd blow up over something stupid and the relationship would never recover. He ended up in the hospital one too many times (literally only once but given his family's financial issues, it was too many), and that was a low point for his family. He believes/knows it's his fault, and the guilt still hangs around.

The assignment that got him on Graves's radar for Shadow Company is actually how he met his wife. It was several years ago, probably around 6-8 years, but his wife was one of the nurses on staff that helped patch up the unit afterwards. Truck wasn't injured but she had been so worried and insisted on examining him. His teammates tried to discourage her from pushing him, cause he's got a super short temper, but they all were shook when he simply said "Okay, fine." and allowed her to examine him.

He insisted on getting in touch with her afterwards because "she's the one person that can push all my buttons and I'll never blow a fuse" *catch me crying in the corner over this fire sentence that I wrote*

Anyways, that's our boy Truck!!! I love him to death even more so now!!

[ciaossu-imagines]

I’m not sure whether I’ve told you enough about him so if you want more info for this, you can ask but how do you think my OC Haruki would get along with everyone as just another HOMRA member (so his dad and him don’t know that technically they’re related)? Like I had this thought that he’s sent back in time and loses his memories of his family and comes across the bar and shrugs and is like “Could do with a drink before I try to figure stuff out.” and then he comes across everyone and they ask whether he wants to join and when they explain to him what HOMRA is, he’s like “Sure, sounds like fun.” What do you think his life would be like with them and all of that?

C

Okay, this was a really interesting take, an interesting AU, and I can't wait to see if you do anything with the thought! These were my thoughts on it and I hope, if nothing else, they'll either amuse you or give you different ways to view this. I know Haruki in particular is incredibly precious to you and I don't think I've done him well in these, mostly down to differences in how we view the canon characters, but I hope I didn't do it offensively badly and you know none of anything that might be really off was done out of malice.

Okay, so even if Haruki existed within the same time period as the HOMRA original generation, or as you say, even if he was sent back in time, with his memories lost, and he stumbles across the bar, I do think it's highly unlikely he'd meet everyone right off. While the bar is definitely a central meeting ground for the members, they don't live there and even in MOR, it was shown that Shouhei just kind of didn't show up for a month or more because he was out visiting his family, so all the guys aren't there all the time.

Even if he decides he really likes the atmosphere of the bar and keeps returning enough to have really met all the members, I don't feel like he'd get real close with any of them, not right off the bat. While some of the guys are real friendly types, like Shouhei and Kamamoto, HOMRA as a gang still tends to be kind of insular in my opinion. The guys aren't opening up about their lives and sharing all kinds of things with Haruki right away. Some of the friendlier members might be chatty enough with him, small talk and joking, because he is a regular at the bar and they like him well enough, but I don't see him forming any real and solid bonds with the guys until he becomes a HOMRA member himself.

In terms of becoming a HOMRA member, I don't think the guys really talk about the gang in front of regular customers and they're not out and outright bragging about their gang activities or chattering real loud about them in front of people who aren't HOMRA members themselves. So I don't see Haruki learning about HOMRA from the members themselves or even just sitting around the bar. HOMRA is, in canon, not only very much an actual gang, but a well-known and somewhat feared gang in Shizume City. So I see it being much more likely that he hears about it out in the city proper, from other people he meets because obviously, he's not spending every moment in the bar. He's been dropped in Shizume City and he'll need to find a job so he can afford a place to stay, afford food, and things like that because HOMRA definitely isn't just taking in random people. As kind as some of their members are, the only one who just takes in strays is Fujishima, and he only takes in stray people if they're really badly hurt, like Eric was. Even then, Eric was only allowed to stay at Bar HOMRA for a short period of time, he doesn't properly live there. So I could see Haruki, at his part time job, mentioning something about how much he likes the bar and one of his coworkers really filling him in on how that's reportedly the headquarters of this really terrifying and brutal HOMRA gang and how Haruki needs to be more careful.

Haruki though? He's not really one whose all that opposed to violence or gang activities and he's actually going to be kind of interested in what he's been told. On his next trip into the bar, I could see him just kind of casually bringing it up, mentioning that he's heard HOMRA's a gang and hey, what does a guy need to do to join? It's then that he's kind of filled in on the initiation process and after being accepted as even a potential worthy candidate of initiation, he passes the test of taking Mikoto's hand and becomes a member. It's after that happens that I see Haruki actually getting to seriously know and form relationships with each of the different members.

Now, even though Haruki is a member, he's a newbie member and I see a lot of fights at first. And these particular fights I'm seeing really are ones that continue until Izumo really cracks some skulls together and reprimands both people involved. He gets Totsuka to talk to Haruki and really set out some rules. The thing is, even as a brand new member to this really big-deal, frightening gang, Haruki can get rather lippy and he really hates Chitose. He's always calling Chitose out on one thing or another in Chitose's behaviour, showing him absolutely no respect and the two will get in more than one fist-fight and, despite what you might think, Haruki doesn't always walk away the victor because there is a reason Chitose is in HOMRA and while he's the one most likely to leave situations before fighting, he is more than capable of beating the shit out of someone and when he is angry, Chitose gets brutal. Like I said, Izumo steps in to handle things when it gets really bad and Totsuka makes very sure that Haruki is clear on one thing - HOMRA, while not real sticklers on hierarchy, is a gang and you respect your superiors in the gang. On top of that, HOMRA is a family and even if you don't agree with one of the other members on everything, you still need to try to find the good in them and you need to be willing to have their backs. Blood in, blood out type of shit and if Haruki can't and won't respect that fact, blood out it will be. I think after that, while there's definitely still a dislike between the two men, there's a kind of truce established and the two mostly just avoid spending a lot of time together or really talking to each other.

Like almost all the other HOMRA members, I don't see Haruki getting really close to Mikoto because Mikoto doesn't easily form real close bonds with other people. It's not something he easily does and he holds himself really apart from most of the HOMRA members in some way. However, Mikoto doesn't mind Haruki, sees him as one of his own in the same way he sees all the others as part of his own, and Haruki has a respect and, at points, a kind of awe for Mikoto, much the same as the other HOMRA members.

Izumo doesn't have any real big issues with Haruki outside of the fights he occasionally gets into with the others, and Izumo has that issue with almost all the members to some extent. He's pretty chill with Haruki, since Haruki pays his tab on time, frequented the bar even before becoming a member, doesn't really do any property damage to bar HOMRA, and doesn't seem to bear any ill will towards HOMRA in general. Overall, Izumo's kind of easy-going that way, and he looks out for Haruki the same way he kind of looks out for all of HOMRA's members and interacts with him much the same as he would any other HOMRA member.

There's a lot of teasing and remarks when Haruki first comes around, and even after he officially joins, about how much Haruki looks like Shouhei and is Shouhei sure he doesn't have siblings out there. Was Shouhei's dad stepping out or did his mom sleep with the milkman or something and all that kind of good-natured ribbing. Maybe it is because they do look alike and even act alike in some ways, maybe it's because Shouhei's just a really friendly guy. Either way, I see Shouhei really taking Haruki under his wing, taking the guy out and introducing him to people, bringing him to Shouhei's favourite clubs or cool parties Shouhei thinks he'll like. The two of them build a solid friendship. Totsuka and Kamamoto, the other really friendly and gregarious members of HOMRA, also kind of take it upon themselves to get Haruki out and to show him around Shizume City, get him out and socializing and meeting people, giving him opportunities he might not get on his own and it's because of all three of them that Haruki really does settle into his life in Shizume City.

Haruki doesn't mind kids and, if his mood is right, he kind of relishes the chances to be a surrogate big brother, so I do see him getting along well with Anna, especially once he gets used to her. She is, admittedly, a little off-putting at first and he found a kid hanging around a bar like she was a little weird and creepy, but once the two of them warmed up to each other, I see him developing a real soft spot for her and he sometimes takes her out to do things together.

As far as fighting goes, I do see Yata and Haruki fighting and bickering with each other a lot. It's real bad near the beginning, especially since, even if he's not Yata's favourite person, Chitose is part of HOMRA and has been longer than Haruki and Yata took a lot of offense to everything that went down there. I think in some ways, he'll always kind of hold that grudge against Haruki for that behaviour and disrespect. While the two of them can be cool with each other, overall they do bicker quite a bit. Yata's hot temper and Haruki's penchant for teasing and kind of goading that hot temper just because he does sometimes find Yata's reactions kind of amusing doesn't help. However, at the same time, Haruki does have a lot more respect for Yata than you would guess, and Haruki is careful to toe the line when it comes to how much he'll say to Yata and, while Yata has threatened to get physical, I think the fights between these two are largely verbal sparring. I also see Haruki and Eric having the same sort of relationship, where they will verbally spar and bicker and be rude to each other, but at the same time, they're actually pretty chill with each other and do have some level of respect for the other.

Bandou and Haruki can get along, but overall, Haruki's personality is much too opposite Bandou's own for the two of them to really get close. While Haruki does mirror Shouhei in some respects, so you would think Bandou would be able to form that same sort of friendship with Haruki, there's not as much history with Bandou as Shouhei has and that really affects things. Bandou would willing throw down on Haruki's behalf, like he would for every other member, but Bandou never gets real close to him. However, Haruki doesn't insult Bandou or make rude comments about him, so I think Bandou's a little more prone to liking Haruki than being true neutral on him.

Speaking of true neutral, I kind of see that being the type of relationships Dewa and Fujishima have with Haruki. There's mutual respect and they're all part of the same gang. They get along well enough and they can talk easily enough when they spend time together, but neither Dewa or Fujishima are going out of their way to spend time with Haruki outside of HOMRA. Again, it's largely just a personalities not really aligning and clicking whole-heartedly there and not out of any real dislike.

[vivelegalite]

im having what may be the worst week in my whole 20 years on this earth, so here's a few byler thoughts i commented on someone's post and thought deserved their own post!!! if i got some things wrong, sorry im extremely mentally drained and my wifi literally stopped working halfway through this <3 feel free to correct me or join me in my delusion in the comments/tags/asks/dms though!!!! i need a distraction desperately so don't hesitate to interact!!!!

without further ado, here it is:

why the "i told you, joyce has this telemarketer job. mike won't stop whining about it" line is definitely about will, as evidenced by literally what the show tells us.

it's not exactly clear when watching season 3 what el's status is with the us govt following its finale. she's searched for throughout seasons 1, 2 and 3, but it's clear she was discovered following her role in fighting the spider monster and stopping the soviets. it's assumed some sort of deal is made following the battle of starcourt, allowing el to live as a normal teenager after the byers family relocates to california — dr. owens is said to help them settle in lenora, in a house they most likely wouldn't be able to afford without help.

i've seen points made for both will and el being primary reasons for the byers family leaving. will, obviously traumatised by the upside down and thus the whole town of hawkins, most likely wouldn't stand to stay there much longer without his mental health deteriorating. el is very much the same — the lab, upside down, the mall where she lost her dad are still fresh in her mind.

however, we also later find out about an apparent divide between the government and hawkins national lab, namely dr. owens and brenner. we learn that el is indeed still a fugitive, and she is still actively being searched for by authorities. that's the real reason for the move.

we've finally arrived at our point — letters, calls, and how mike kept in touch with both el and will.

in seasons 1-4 we are shown numerous times that phones are not to be trusted, and that phone lines are not safe. we know the people who were initially wiretapping hopper's and joyce's phones are the same people who then helped them escape, but after season 3 (timeline wise) and season 4 (when we are shown), this changes. dr. owens and brenner are no longer working with the government, instead operating in secret, meaning the means of communication they used to once take advantage of is no longer viable for el.

although this is only speculation on my part, i would venture to say it's pretty obvious.

government taps phones, it's a thing they do —» can no longer trust government —» knowing they tap phones, you shouldn't use them anymore.

this, however, isn't speculation: el is never mentioned in association with calls, only letters. season 4 opens with a letter from el to mike being read out, when she and mike fight she pulls out a stack of letters to prove he can't write that he loves her, and finally, will's line at the rinkomania:

"you've called maybe a couple of times. it's been a year, mike. meanwhile el has like, a book of letters from you."

will thinks mike is no longer interested in whatever he has to say because mike only called a handful of times within the timespan of a year (actually closer to 8 months, but...). he also pairs that sentiment with the fact that mike does keep in touch with el, exchanging letters regularly.

letters, because of the phone lines not being secure, are an El Thing™. we can gather from this line that calls are a Will Thing™, or at least they used to be before joyce got that telemarketing job (the timeline of which is unclear, honestly, given how the last letter el sends to mike in march mentions the job as though it was a new development, which does nothing to explain why mike failed to stay in touch with will since october. but that's another can of worms we don't have time to unpack now. my bet is on internalised homophobia btw).

thus, the line about mike whining about joyce's job? he regrets not being able to talk to will.

bonus: why doesn't mike want to write will letters, too?

i'd bet on a mix of the fanfiction staple aka "i couldn't write because i would constantly pour too much heart onto paper and/or sign the letter as love, mike" and (arguably more plausible) mike finding will's voice comforting.

i mean, come on, their whole thing is being afraid of losing each other. season 1 and 2 are literally about mike losing will and trying to get him back, first physically then mentally. season 3 is mike losing will metaphorically, growing apart because of his actions. in season 4 they acknowledge this — will saying he'd prefer to rip off the bandaid if he were to lose mike, and mike recognising that he lost will because he worried too much about el.

i feel like after all of this, ESPECIALLY seasons 1 and 2, it would be comforting to mike to actually hear will and know that he's safe and sound. if your best friend disappears for days and his voice is the only thing giving you hope about him being alive, i think it's understandable to prefer being able to hear him when he's gone from sight.

i keep imagining season 1 mike calling out to will on the walkie talkie, and can't help but think letters simply wouldn't cut it for them.

[pbandjesse]

I am finally home! Today was a very long, but very lovely day. I am excited to sleep though. I am very tired.

I didn't get enough sleep last night. I couldn't turn my brain off and was scrolling on my phone until at least 130. Eventually falling asleep but it was tough.

I told James to wake me up before they left to give me a hug. And that helped me get up and dressed on time for my self imposed timeline.

I made the bed, not well but I made it. And went to get dressed.

I had oiled my hair last night and I knew I would be braiding my hair today and I just felt so cute. I love this dress so much, even if it doesn't have pockets. And I just felt like everything was on point. My jewelery and makeup and hair and dress. Just an excellent look for an excellent day.

James had left me a sandwich and because I had a feeling, I squished it really hard and when I opened it in the car all the rubby egg had soaked into the bread! So I did not accidently spill it all over myself which would have really upset me. I felt like I had beat the system.

It was cold outside. My new jacket with a built in scarf was a very cozy piece for the day. I grabbed my gifts, and poured a drink, and I was off.

It was a pretty easy drive. The best one of the day. I would listen to a podcast. And a lot of music. I felt like the car was drifting a little bit I was doing my best to maintain my lane.

I would arrive at my parents' house at 1040. Just about exactly when I thought I would get there. My body was pretty sore but that was fine. I was just happy to be there.

The dogs were all barking and freaking out as I walked up. I barked back at them, teasing. But I was happy to see them.

But I was more happy to see my mom. I would sit with her at her chair and hugged and chatted for a while. Eventually dad yelled from the other room, asking why I hadn't come say hi, and I yelled back he's supposed to be practicing walking and should come out here. Just in a teasing mood. But I woul go and say hello.

Dad was a little sad today. He had gone to see his aunt Ellen and she's not doing amazing and it rattled him a bit. But he seems to be seeing well and he sounded clear. I was just really happy to see him.

I would go back to sit with mom while he got dressed. We talked about the state of the world and propaganda and how easy it is to fall into an echo chamber. And then we went to open her early birthday presents.

She really liked the chocolates and shortbread tins. The house and tree from my shopping trip the other day. They are a hit for sure. She also was surprised that the candle I got her was four thieves scented because she thought that was like a branded scent. But I remember she liked it when she went through her essential oil phase so I'm glad I was able to get her something she hasn't had (at least I'm assuming) in a while. I also pressed her some flowers in a frame. Just simple little gifts that I thought she would enjoy.

I have been of the mind lately that gifts should make you feel seen. That's what I want from a gift. So I'm trying hard to buy or make things that give people that feeling. I hope I am doing a good job.

Dad would join us at the dining table for a long discussion about me and James buying a house. We discussed how we can best afford it, and the possibility of leaving the city. I showed them some houses, including a blue one I really like we are seeing tomorrow.

I really appreciate my parents. How supportive they are. But also how smart they were with the money they had. My dad has always worked so hard but he was also so smart about what he did with his money in a way I just can't wrap my head around at times. He has a lot of forethought that is really impressive.

We all sat and talked for a long time. And I think we have a pretty excellent plan. And speaking to James we actually have more wiggle room then I realized so that was cool to know and gives me more information to work with. I'm excited to keep looking. And really it's nice that we aren't on a hard deadline. We can stay in our apartment for an indefinite amount of time. So the hunt isn't super stressful and I can just have fun looking.

Me and mom went down to the basement to go through a box of stuff she had collected for me. Some Disney stuff and some musical instruments. Amazing. And a crazy disinfect light that I'm a little nervous about using!! Has a lot of warning. We will see if I actually am able to use it in this apartment but I appreciate her giving it to me.

We would order pizza. We went upstairs to see if dad wanted anything. While mom was ordering dad told me some really nice stuff. Just complimenting my character and how I'm kind and thoughtful and even if I struggle to express how thankful I am, he can see I am thankful because of how I act. I love my dad, and it was just really nice to hear him say that, and tell me how he sees me.

Mom and me would sit in the kitchen and eat. Talked and fed the dogs treats. Eventually dad joined us and we watched my tiktoks and laughed and just had fun. I felt loved and it was really good. I miss going out with them and I hope in the spring we can do things outside the house together.

Around 330 I had to get myself together if I was going to go visit Jess before I went home. Mom loaded me up, hugs all around, and then I was off.

This was the worst drive of the day. I don't know what happened but I somehow put the wrong address in which would add almost an hour to my drive. This was not fun. It wouldn't have been so bad except I was driving into the sun for the first hour. It was pretty miserable.

Then I saw a ton of smoke and ended up by a house fire. The sub was going down. I was trapped by a bus. There were fire trucks and police and it was a lot. And my GPS said I was right sorund the block from my destination. But nothing looked familiar.

So I turned off the gps and typed in Jess's address again. And I was actually 20 minutes away??? I was in Salem!! No idea how I messed up so bad but I just wanted to not be in the car anymore.

When I finally arrived at Jess's I was pretty upset. I accidentally called James but it was nice to hear their voice. Jess gave me a hug and I calmed myself down.

Her parents were there and it was really nice to see them. I got all filled in on how having all of Jess's family there was. Apparently they did not eat enough food. So I got to eat snacks. I had a little gift for Jess and she has a little gift for me. I was just happy to hang out for a while.

Her parents would leave and we continued to sit in the couch. We were talking and having fun. She showed me her review from work that was wildly glowing and I'm so proud of her. We went through the Disney stuff mom gave me, including a whole bag of pins. I had chosen the ones I wanted already, but I also made some guesses about what ones I thought she would chose. And I was pretty close!! I know her so well.

At 815 I decided I needed to get back on the road if I wanted to see James before they went to sleep.

Jess helped me bring things to the car. She packed up brownies for me and gave me a bottle of soda. And then I was off.

This final drive of the day was pretty neutral. People driving with their high beams on was frustrating. But I enjoyed my music and I only had to deal with a little traffic. I rolled up at home at 10.

James came down to help me bring some stuff in. I had two packages and that was exciting. I sat in the floor to talk to my husband for a bit after they helped me out some stuff away. I love them so much.

I grabbed a short shower. And now I am very ready to sleep. Let's hope it's an easy one.

I hope to do a bunch of sewing tomorrow. Wish me luck! Goodnight everyone!