#my general life situation hasnt changed much | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

makiema · 4 years

Text

finally finished writing about how much stormbringer enhances the skk dynamic which was at a nascent stage in Fifteen and anticipates the developments which happen later and culminate in Dead Apple where the faith they have in each other is absolutely remarkable! the fact that i said i’d do this in a few hours yesterday but it took me like 24 hrs to finish i have an attention span of a whole 2 minutes 💀

my favorite thing about stormbringer is that it actually builds up on the concepts/themes introduced in Fifteen so it's a glimpse into what has changed in dazai and dazai & dhuuya after one year of being together. As much as it's about chuuya confronting his past and his identity this is also about dazai’s development from who he was in fifteen. chuuya and rimbaud both left their marks on dazai and in Stormbringer we see him, actually trying to emulate or follow in a sense a way of life, that chuuya and rimbaud represented. Stormbringer is not just about chuuya, abt his test of humanity, or he coming in terms with who or what he is. it's about dazai too. it's about dazai developing or at least attempting to develop what he calls “boyish”/ “ordinary” in Fifteen. its not about chuya having an identity crisis. in fact what we understand from Code 04's last section is that chuuya never considered it as his crisis and neither did dazai. so to dazai “saving chuuya is important, human or not doesn't matter” and when dazai gives chuuya time to think abt what the operation will cost him chuuya doesnt so much as flinch form his purpose. This goes on to show unlike verlaine he doesnt care about memory and certainly doesnt consider it as the only determinant of someone being human. He cares more abt yokohama and his friends and in that, in caring abt his “family”, he is just as human as the next person. whether he’s factually human or not comes secondary to his desire to save people. This is a message that the quality of being human has more to do with embodying human qualities or humanity than having memories and lineage. so yeah stormbringer is essentially about embracing humanity but this happens on 2 levels: both chuuya and dazai embrace humanity. Going back to the boyish or ordinary bit, im talking abt this segment:

here dazai is shocked because he assumed everyone “gangsta” and everyone crazy powerful delighted in homicide, in deliberately indulging in the macabre. but he is proved wrong. He logically concluded that anyone with power more than average and belonging to the underground would kill people and delight in that because it’s a given they lack any kind of moral understanding. To that end, they’d be exalted at the prospect of relentlessly shooting a dead body, mutilating it and dishonoring it. The mafia code (any general mafia code) works in a way where honor and death goes hand in hand. So only the lowest of the low would do that to a dying person, who even when faced with certain death is loyal to his own organisation. This really shows that even within the mafia dazai is the only person whos like the devil incarnate. So yeah dazai at this sate far lower than even a mafia member. But chuuya who actually embodiess the mafia code and is incredibly loyal to his organisation and “family” [ putting family in quotes bc he himself calls his friends family 🥺] ofc kicks the gun away. From dazai’s pov chuuya being as insanely powerful as he is should also do the same. But chuuya comes along and suggests that even enemies should be shown respect where it’s due. And that is what an ordinary person, oblivious to mafia life (mafia life as in waht dazai makes of it) thinks. So in undermining the binary between “ordinary” and “mafia” chuuya proves that being mafia doesnt necessarily mean selling your soul to the devil and giving up the last smidge of humanity. In fact by embodying qualities like compassion and kindness and mutual respect, you can make the mafia a better place for yourself and for the other members. Now in Stormbringer, we see how this affected dazai. here dazai is introduced as someone mercilessly killing to set up the channel.

Now to expand the channel one would need to keep doing it right? To mercilessly kill ppl and stuff but instead what he does is hand the channel over to chuuya bc he knows chuuya wouldnt handle it like him. im not suggesting that dazai miraculously becomes v good or anything with dazai the key words is “try” or “to some extent” like in Fifteen when Chuuya asks “do u wanna live” he’s like “ not to that extent”. similarly its not to say he doesnt kill people anymore. it is that he tries to lessen the number of casualties by handing over one of the most troublesome channels to chuuya who would manage it in a much more humane way. That dazai draws from his friends/at least tries to is smth we’ll see again later on when he deals with akutagawa. He talks about odasaku and ofc its baffling to him that a mafia member as powerful as him would be taking acre of orphans. and dazai says but he cant afford to be that kind and proceeds to shoot akutagswa but again does so in a calculated way such that he doesnt end up killing him ( im NOT justifying dazai’s abuse not at all im just saying that its hard to believe he coincidentally knew the exact no of bullets that aku could block. and had odasaku’s words and his way of life not been in the back of his mind he could’ve ended up killing aku) coming back to chuuya and dazai we also see him avoiding further conversation on the jewelry channel thing as he says “leave that for now”. He does a similar thing again when mori brings up the concept of double suiciding with chuuya.

Its a HUGE thing for him to digest that him suiciding would inevitably spell the doom for chuuya. this puts an unimaginable responsibility on him. And he avoids further discussion on this. Now we know dazai is the rambly type. Even in the most dire moments he goe son with his LOONG monologues so really he is the last person who’d avoid a conversation but he deliberately does it in these 2 instances because its hard for him to grasp these things. That he can go against his nature and do a conscientious thing by handing over one of the most grisly channels to chuuya (i dont think dazai’s nature is evil. Or even if it is, its a a social construct keeping in mind the war ravaged times or its mori’s construct because he does exploit dazai to the hilt. but dazai ofc thinks of himself as non-human, devious. perfectly devilish...etc.) And also the fact that someone as suicidal as him is actually responsible for the life of someone else is really too much to take in. a whole 10 seconds pause indicates just how much he was thrown off when mori opened his eyes to the reality of things: if he dies, chuuya inexorably dies as a consequence. also i dont think the “wow” here or the next bit :

is something jokey. if it was like haha double suicide with chuuya is the worst haha wanna do it w pretty lady kind of a deal. that pause would have been unnecessary. dazai’s immediate reaction would’ve been whining and shit. the use of “froze” too implies the gravity of the situation. so ofc what is “wow” is how much meaning his life has for someone else. and for some so much....better than him. and what is unacceptable is this sad, sad truth that his life (to which he ascribes no value) would be so inextricably linked with someone else’s and hold so much meaning to them. it is like when a suicidal person at the brink of suicide understanding his life is not his own. his life and death holds consequences for ppl surrounding him. so both of these are huge things to grasp and at both these times dazai is visibly shaken up so much so that he doesnt want to do his favorite thing- ramble in a condescending tone. smth he does in so many instances. this really is a testimony to the fact that things are changing in him. the redemption process has begun. he’s no longer the kind of maniac he was before he encountered chuuya. when zuko underwent his transition in atla he was so shaken up after one (1) right decision he had a fever. i think this is true for anyone who’s trying to change. change is after all a huge thing for everyone. ofc he’ll be unsettled. so anyways this is proof that he has indeed come a long way from being someone who revelled at the prospect of meaningless bloodshed.

now coming to the concept of love he assumes he’d get sick of love and die:

and that death is the singular goal worth chasing after because it makes you feel more alive/get a fuller picture of what living entails. but here he is erring by supposing love is something that’ll bore him/have no meaning. and it cant provide him that “something” he’s looking for. at this point he hasn’t loved so he doesnt know whether he’ll be sick of it or if it'll have no impact. And yet he’s morose and regretful. this is a kind of self-imposed constraint hes putting on himself. he cancels out the v idea of love because hes convinced it isnt worth it. he hasnt even been in love okay scratch being in love that sounds romantic and i really dont mean love in a romantic sense here...its just love. in general. any form is cool. anyway so dazai is not familiar with any kind of love. He is entirely alien to the concept. he doesnt even know what a friend/partner is so he doesnt know what love is. this is cleared out here when rimbaud confesses he did everything for paul and dazai is unconvinced:

chuuya ofc admonishes him and shuts him up for good, he says dazai has no right lookind down upon smth he doesnt understand. he doesnt understand friendship, love. or loyalty. or how important those feelings are at this point. now this situation is turned on its head in stormbringer. but before we go into that let’s look at the message rimbaud had for both of them. ik he specifically asks for chuuya to “live” but there’s purpose behind including both of them in the frame. it’s a message they should both take to heart. and at the end of it its implied both are changed after hearing it:

and in this message the first bit is for chuuya. what he says is basically memory doesn’t make u human... ”you are you” just a frame or not doesnt matter. and even if hes just a frame, he is still beautiful. beauty actually is a v important concept in literature starting right from Plato to Shakespeare. i’d not bring this here but because bsd is so deeply rooted in literature i feel like the reference to beauty, and later on to soul and even warmth and also the universal tone of this message carries some meaning. so the thing is both Plato and Shakespeare were endorsed the idea of love as a force awakened in the world by beauty which then leads the soul to perfection. so humans and by extension, all life are beautiful frames that can inspire love. this concept is also there in Romantic poetry like Keats and Wordsworth all of them talked about loving beauty in nature and how that can elevate the body mind and soul. so essentially in telling this to chuuya what ehe basically means is that chuuya just by being him, by being a beautiful framework can inspire love and warmth in others and thats a great purpose! how much chuuya understands of this purpose with his one (1) braincell and his low self esteem is questionable but he gets some sense of belonging. now this is a two way relationship so ofc dazai has to be factored in. he comes in the next part:

these are from 2 different translation so the disparity im sorry ;-; but anyway, this last part abt the world being a cold place. then paul. then “warmth” is a message to dazai who’s been introduced to us as cold-hearted and having like no bearings of a human being. this is the reason why its important for both o f them to be there. now going back to chuuya being a beautiful framework, the framework can be beautiful in so far as its beauty is appreciate by someone and inspires warmth and love in someone. this again is the whole beauty/beholder nature/the romantic concept that is there in shakespeare and in Romantic poetry where both are a part of a codependent relationship. so what rimbaud implies here is that dazai can have that kind of a relationship with another person (chuuya) just like rimbaud had with paul which makes him warm and the world doesnt feel cold anymore. rimbaud has no regrets about what he did because. so the idea is that dazai and chuuya can share the same dynamic. also after this, the narrative says that their hearts are now changed and wont return to what they were before....and even their souls are refined in a way. but in Fifteen we dont have a concrete proof of how this happened bc the novel ends at this point. Instead, Stormbringer shows exactly how deep the impact of those words is:

this is the third instance of dazai showing hesitation and once again this has to do with chuuya. the seed of the dynamic that rimbaud was talking about is already germinating in him. his reactions, his fidgeting, his hesitancy, in response to chuuya’s situation is such a big contrast to his cocksure self when he’s conversing with adam and verlaine. after this of course we have:

not only does he clearly express his concern but he gives chuuya 2 whole mins to make a decision and based on that he’s prepared to overturn the operation. the success rate of an alternative plan will ofc be lesser than the og one but that doesnt faze dazai. he’s ready to turn the tide for chuuya’s sake and if this is not development idk what is. just a year ago, he was someone to whom the concept of rimbaud going thru all that trouble for his friend was a lost concept. ironically enough, now he finds himself doing something that is along the same lines. he puts chuuya above his mission. to him, chuuya is more important than getting a satisfactory result. another bit that i wanna talk abt is that one controversial section where dazai says he’ll save chuuya, human or not, and then the justification is:

i think a lot of people got mad bc of this and honestly at first glance i was peeved too. as a chuuya stan some of the shit dazai has done so far did rub me the wrong way. i love skk obv but still those were moments that kind of left a bad taste in the mouth. i’ll discuss them later on bc stormbringer helps allay that feeling. coming back to the “i wanna see chuuya suffer” part firstly context is important. ofc someone like dazai cant be expected to be upfront about his feelings with ppl (or AI) he barely knows. so what be relays to adam, is only partly true and its actually a kind of a twist in concept. the things is, and this is smth dazai knows all too well is that ppl suffer simply on account of being human. human suffering is brought on because humans, by virtue of being humans, feel. so when he says he’s willing to acknowledge chuuya as human despite what N and Verlaine said he’s already admitting that chuuya suffers. so there is really nothing “new” to see for him. he knows chuuya suffers already and he does too because they’re both humans trying to make it thru their messed up lives. also chuuya “ceasing to be human” is a p huge concern for him bc he himself is like that. just like with the suicide thing, it bothers dazai when someone else shares his situation/his fate like as long as his life is his own, he has no problem ending it whenever but the situation is complicated when someone else’s life span is determined by that decision. and similarly, as long as he is “no longer human” its not that much of an issue because he’s like resigned to a doomed fate but someone like chuuya ceasing to be human or worse yet never getting to know if hes human or not are pressing matters. so anyways what he actually means here is that in saving chuuya, he saves someone who suffers just like he does and in their case, even the cause of suffering boils down to a shared psychological conflict: what essentially constitutes being human and if im human or not. now this sharing of pain and suffering is the foundation of forming a connection with someone, which makes life a little better. here again, what rimaud imparted to dazai and chuuya is driven home. also dazai’s key anxiety is not finding meaning/anything. this “anything” can be assumed to be something that justifies life. so all his anxiety and frustration stems from the fact that there really is no discernible meaning to be found in the mechanism of life. so it is an empty pursuit because it is true that nothing can explain why feelings of pain and suffering are exponentially heavier than feelings of happiness or why after getting to experience one (1) free day we’re back to square one where life is grueling. these are questions that really dont have an answer so every time dazai like gazes into the abyss and says he didnt find anything, he is not so much asking if he’ll ever find anything as swallowing the hard truth that there is nothing to be found, no singular entity exists that can magically justify everything. again drawing upon literature or philosophy more specifically, there’s a concept called Absurdism which says the only philosophical truth so to say is this that life is absurd and looking for meaning is futile. instead what we can do is accept that it is absurd and deal with it in the best way possible, by finding little sources and moments of happiness, and strewing them together so we feel somewhat content. even if it is just for a fleeting second. and this happiness/contentment amidst a wretched life (altho temporal) can be found in friendship, in sharing, and even in having fun with people you’re comfortable with! this is actually why dazai wants to save chuuya and now it may seem like im interpreting his words through the shipping lens but thats not so and it can be corroborated by looking into dazai’s words to odasaku. after chuuya, dazai’s next attempt at friendship was odasaku who he found “interesting”. now when odasaku sort of like threw hands and chose death over having to live a life without the orphans, dazai tried to stop him not by saying stuff like life is good. and things will def change for the better. but instead he admits that living is hard and the sense of void is ubiquitous and yet he doesnt want him to up and die because then he would be sad. because the little comfort that he got from odasaku and something he probably assumed odasaku also got from him would be gone. [how much odasaku considered dazai a source of comfort remains unclear. in fact the reason odasaku gave up and died was because he did not have this. this feeling of sharing in someone else’s suffering and seeking comfort in friends in the real world. instead he was too vested in his ideal world. his over reliance on an entirely idealistic concept is actually what pushed him over the edge. and this would have been the case for dazai too had he not encountered and sought comfort and companionship in chuuya and eventually in odasaku ] so this again goes on to show how rimbaud’s words changed dazai’s heart. and in a way dazai really has been doing this unconsciously form the v beginning like by teasing chuuya continually in Fifteen. you dont expect someone as cold as him to indulge in friendly bickering and taunting so often but he does. that there is significance and even happiness in that is something he learns over time, after rimbaud’s words to him. although these things seem futile on the surface they give a moment’s respite. so although chuuya spinning dazai on a rope in stormbringer might seem weird to everyone, they still serve a purpose:

what shirase puts forward is particularly relevant here because neither dazai nor chuuya is fully aware of the extent of their feelings (or even what those feelings are like they dont know what label to put. so typical oblivious lovers) for each other or what they stand to gain just by driving each other nuts but there is something intangible but satisfying to be felt. a kind of contentment that helps him continue. one day at a time. there is no one great “thing” that can make him like wake up one day feeling like he doesnt want to die ever again. but again like i said before, the key word for dazai is “extent” so, these little things to some extent contribute to a sense of fulfilment which helps him keep death at bay. thats why he’s bent on saving chuuya bc he knows they can share in their suffering and make life better for each other. its not like he wants chuuya to suffer. chuuya will suffer nonetheless like every other human. but in suffering together there is something to be found so he doesnt want him to cease being human.

this covers more or less the intertextuality between Stormbringer and Fifteen. i just wanna talk a bit more about a couple other moments in Stormbringer that i feel are p important because they put some things in the series in perspective and also made the dead apple moment 10x more emotional 🥺 one thing that really strikes me is the absolute fanon level of comfort that dazai and chuuya share in Strombringer. its like scenes form k-drama lol.

so yeah this stuff. compare this with dazai’s reaction @atsushi when he drops im not saying that its not just a joke and that what im saying should be the right way to look at this contrast. its not like that at all. but what this does is give an estimate to the readers just how close and comfortable dazai feels when its chuuya. and this plus everything i rambling on abt for so long also gives us an estimate about the sincerity of dazais feelings. now 2 things always bothered me : the fact that dazai actually left chuuya and the fact that after the fight against lovecraft he actualy deserted him (this again can ofc be construed as just a humorous bit but still it did leave a bad taste in my mouth) dazai leaving the mafia is ofc something he had to do to fulfil oda’s dying wish but it still dint sit right with me that he would abandon chuuya. just like oda levaing is harder on dazai, dazai leaving is harder on chuuya. its always harder on the one left behind. so anyway, these sorts of things sometimes made me doubt dazai’s feelings but now that stormbringer clears it all up i do think there is a larger motif at work here. when mori offers dazai to come back to the mafia in s2 we see him saying that it was mori who kicked him out and that he did so because he was afraid dazai would usurp his position. so he set it up in a way that dazai would be forced to leave but on his own accord. now more than usurpation i believe what mori really did fear is that dazai had no allegiance to the mafia (which is actually true) bc he doesnt have that sense of loyalty and that to him his friends were more important than swearing allegiance to mori. (which again is true). so by getting oda killed, the message that mori seemed to be giving out was if dazai didnt leave he would do it again. and if we consider ango’s betrayal which had already transpired at that point, the one mori would next target to sort of get at dazai would inevitably be chuuya. this is only conjecture but still, i do believe this might as well be true because then it would explain why dazai didnt carry chuuya back to the base after their fight [something he was v comfortable doing in Stormbringer. in fact in the first case he carries chuuya back to the billiards bar and not to the mafia’s base so he could hear albatross’ last words 🥺] its because mori needs to know unlike dazai, chuuya is absolutely loyal to him which regrettably he is. it kinda becomes imperative therefore on part of dazai to make it seem that way to mori. that they really are at each others throats and that dazai is insignificant to chuuya. and that the mafia comes before dazai. (which is not true bc we see chuuya protecting his friend [shirase] while also staying loyal to the mafia in Stormbringer)

mori also in his own way tries to provoke hostility b/w them like in Dead Dpple when he was all like yeah so dazai is the star and chuuya is merely bait. so it kinda makes sense if dazai left the mafia not only to like do good work but also to protect chuuya from mori. also the fact that chuuya did the same thing— left the Sheep and joined PM to protect Shirase from the mafia makes be believe that my speculation is plausible given all the parallels we find between dazai and chuuya.

and the last bit is about the brilliant Dead Apple scene and how much added context it gets in light of Stormbringer.

in this scene dazai first says: “you used Corruption believing in me?” and then the translation is “how beautiful” which is an okay translation but the exact thing dazai said was “nakasetekurerune” which literally is : youre gonna make me cry you know? now my knowledge of japanese is like duolingo level but i do know “nakasete” has to do with crying and “kureru” is used by the receiver to indicate he’s receiving a feeling/object from someone close. so basically chuuya trusting him is something so beautiful that it could almost move him to tears. now lets look at dazai’s intro in Stormbringer:

dazai, being dazai, ofc would be able to tell genuine trust from fealty out of fear so ofc the fact that chuuya has this kind of blind faith in him is overwhelming for him. also stormbringer really expands on the sight effects of Corruption in full detail. its so PAINFUL and to think that chuuya would jump into it right away for dazai’s sake.....no wonder he is so soft when deactivating him. and then he proceeds to flirt for a little bit with the Snow White and the kiss of life reference. but this flirting doesnt seem even a little out of place now. it doesn't feel like smth meaningless or smth that dazai is just saying as a joke. that there is absoluetly no subtext to making a statement like that. instead that kind of flirting feels like smth inspired from a deep, deep familiarity with someone who really shares his heart and soul. when he talks to chuuya abt the problem of not knowing whether he is human or not, it is a problem that is as central to him as it’s to chuuya. not feeling fully reconciled to a human identity is a problem thats fundamental to both of them. I don’t think familiarity gets any deeper than this where you share the exact same psychological problem. so its really wonderful how we can trace the skk development now: what starts out as a crush on part of dazai or not a crush exactly rather, a feeling of perplexed admiration because chuuya is breathtakingly beautiful inside out, eventually gain all these layers and develops into something meaningful where they have so much faith in each other and where they literally help each other live. knowing someone out there shares your exact issue so you’re really not alone in this is perhaps the greatest comfort in the world. also now its clear how both of them would have turned out had they not met each other and had they not taken in rimbaud’s advice. chuuya in his desire to learn about himself and frustration at not being able to do the same would have perhaps spiralled downward and ended up becoming like verlaine. he is his double here after all. and had dazai not seen chuuya up close being the wonderful person he is, he too would have probably ended up developing a god complex and becoming like fyodor. dazai is there to save chuuya literally from dying a monster and chuuya is there to remind him he too can try and mend his ways and embrace his human side. after all chuuya has so much trust him in! (despite him having questionable methods) for both of them, it starts out as an attempt to be more human, then establishing a fruitful partnership, and finally coming in terms with their feelings to some extent. for dazai, he’s comfortable enough to engage in occasional flirting at this point and for chuuya it’s playing along with dazai’s antics (well with the ones he get 💀 pretty boy has half a functional braincell) and openly showing his concern for him. so really by confirming their feelings what strombringer does is enhance the skk development in a way that Dead Apple doesnt seem like fan service anymore. the fact that dazai would casually flirt or be comfortable with chuuya landing on his crotch 💀 all that isnt as ridiculous as it first seemed because stormbringer lays the groundwork and anticipates all the intimate/flirty skk moments that have happened till now and ig will happen again soon.

#bsd #stormbringer #soukoku #dazai osamu #chuuya nakahara #bungou stray dogs #stormbringer spoilers #bsd meta #bsd analysis

370 notes · View notes

omegawolverine · 4 years

Note

Plesse tell me about queerness in the get down!!

okay okay queerness in the get down let's fuckn goooo

disclaimer: I havent watched this show in full for like 5 months at least, probably gonna get something wrong and/or forget some more important bits. also this wasnt proof read I just word vomited

tws: period typical homophobia, abuse mention, f slur use, bury your gays trope, overdose mention, mention of a creepy possible age gap (the age gap hasnt been confirmed so that's why its possible), cops

going from least to most prominent queer characters, let's start with mylene cruz!

so, from the beginning of this show she has an established romantic relationship with ezekiel (although the status of their actual relationship changes frequently throughout the show) and though this was a relationship she was hesitant to pursue, it is clear that she does have romantic feelings for him and if not for them both having growing careers in very different music genres (zeke specifically working in a genre that she repeatedly labels as bad because she thinks they're ruining records + that it isnt real music because they're using someone elses piece and rapping over it, that's not really important here tho lol) they probably wouldve had a much healthier, smooth sailing romance. that being said theres a few things that happen in the show that, while not explicitly clear, or even really good coding at that—to the point where you wont catch if you really arent looking for it (and trust me, I always look for coding, hers was just so little that it flew over my head until I saw someone else mention it)—are still cool to think about!

so, for starters, I wanna mention the toy box performance, which was performed by mylene and regina, who are best friends. that's all cool and shit, and you dont really think much about it...until you hear about the fact that the show runners purposely colored a lot of the scenes in that performance with the bi colors. like. the writers after the show ended basically said "oh yeah there was plans to make her coding more explicit, but our shit got cancelled soooo" and then dropped the fact that she was gonna be bi (or at least implies bi) in the series, which puts a new twist on a few things.

now, besides the bi coloring in the background of the toy box performance (which was mostly on scenes with her and regina, which involved a lot of uh,, lowkey lewd dancing. with each other. in very revealing outfits. wooooo), there's her music! I dont tend to read too much into this one bc, like I said before, her coding is fucking light and the writers themselves said they didnt really get to do much with it, but I think some stuff with her music is interesting. specifically how her, yolanda and regina's song set me free blew up because dizzee, resident (lowkey enby coded) bicon, got their song played in a queer club. also that the song was majorly important to dizzee and started playing literally right as he kissed a boy for the first time and realized "oh shit I like boys that's bonkers". also that the song can be taken in a gay way since literally the entire thing is about becoming your true self, fully and unapologetically, which is what both dizzee and mylene's entire character arcs are about. dizzee (and a lot of other queer people, apparently), heard this song about being set free and it resonated with them so much that they got that shit most of its popularity.

speaking of dizzee and mylene, they parallel each other a lot in the way that their arcs are about them realizing who they are, coming into themselves and no longer just letting people treat them like shit in a sense (dizzee starting to tell people essentially that they can call him weird all they want, they can make fun of how he acts, what he likes, how he dresses, etc. but he likes how he is and quite literally saying "it's okay to be an alien" as he has consistently compared himself to one throughout the show vs mylene learning that if she wants to be a disco singer she needs to put her foot down, not let anyone, not even the love of her life, not even her abusive father, stop her from achieving her dreams, etc. and continuing to pursue her career with or without their support). one more little parallel that I think is interesting is during I think s2 towards the end of the show is when dizzee and thor are shown together having fun with each other, painting all over the building and each other and are basically just being happy and in love together and then they have these clips of them being interspersed with clips of mylene at a party where she is starting to realize that if she wants to get anywhere she needs to be her own main priority and that she needs to put her career and her dream, which is what makes her the happiest, above all else if she wants to succeed. idk I just think how the show made these two into a weird parallel, accidental or not, is neat. maybe not an explicitly queer parallel, but I think at least how her music and whatnot helped dizzee, the main queer character in this show, blossom, is important.

moving on we got shaolin fantastic also known as "oh no your internalized homophobia is showing-"

so, heres a quick list of...interesting shao facts:

Consistently referred to as fag/faggot (shaolin fanfaggot is my personal favorite); he gets really defensive about this despite nobody actually thinking he's queer, it's just people being assholes to be assholes, and he is the only character consistently referred to using a slur, especially a homophobic one, especially for a "straight" character. dizzee, a canonically queer character, is called a fag less than shaolin is even though dizzee actively goes to gay clubs, has a not so secret dude he "hangs out with" and wont let anyone properly meet, paints his nails, wears less than straight clothes even by the 70s standards and is just all around the definition of fucking queer (and I mean like in the weird way, not the gay way). in fact theres only like once I can remember him being called a fag and it had nothing to do with him actually being gay it was literally just like thrown out there the same way you would call someone a bitch.

Has only shown sexual interest in women, yet refuses to have deeper relationships with women in general (possibly because of trauma but who knows) but takes his relationships with his "brothers", specifically zeke, very seriously

Tells zeke and zeke ONLY his real name when zeke was planning to stop being his friend bc shao more or less got boo boo, a like 14 year old black kid, arrested for selling hard drugs; he was clearly scared and trying to do anything to keep zeke around, literally chasing him down the street and hounding him until he got zeke to stop and argue with him

Kept threatening to beat up zeke in the end but couldn't actually bring himself to do so, instead saying that zeke is "fucking lucky" before walking away

Let's zeke get away with things that nobody else can, in general just has a weird soft spot for ezekiel that he shows with nobody else

when shao found dizzee with thor in a vaguely compromising situation (like they were just shirtless covered in paint sleeping next to each other but shao had also seen everything they painted on the walls ((which some of it was sus)), it was clear they had painted on each others bodies and dizzee had been routinely disappearing with this guy for weeks now yet not producing nearly as much art, at least, as far as we audience members know) he didnt judge him but instead, waited for him to get cleaned up and then told him something along the lines of "theres a reason why im so secretive blah blah blah [not everyone needs to know everything about me]", which, in context, kinda implies that he might be a lil. a lil homiesexual. jus a lil.

whenever even the possibility of zeke leaving him comes up he absolutely loses it. he has literally cost ezekiel life changing opportunities because he thought zeke would just up and leave him for them. this could be abandonment issues bc he's a severely traumatized character, and that probably does contribute to it, but it also is just not a reaction he has to any of their other friends just randomly dipping in and out of his life soooooo

generally speaking, this mfer has got either bisexual with a big hard on for zeke coding or homosexual with terrible internalized homophobia and still a hard on for zeke coding. either fucking way, that nigga gay. he gay as hell. gay as fuck man. there wasn't really much to analyze here tbh bc the coding is just so fucking obvious if you look for it or you are/have been a gay person who's dealt with at least a little bit of internalized homophobia.

also, just a sidenote, idk how fucking old shao, but I'm praying hes like at max 19 bc I'm pretty sure zeke is a minor in this show and shao definetly is not so the whole him being heavily implied to have a crush on ezekiel thing is kinda. oof. not oof if zeke is like 17 but any younger than that? OOF.

edit: apparently the characters are only supposed to be a year apart in age but i had no clue about that before writing this post and since shaos age was never actually stated in the show i naturally assumed he was an adult since his actor Looks Like An Adult. this is definetly on me to a certain extent, but i also never saw anything about this when trying to find our their ages so 🤷‍♀️ maybe i just didnt look deep enough, sorry!

now moving on to the main event...marcus dizzee kipling :]

so, first things first, let's talk enby coding bc him being bisexual was already confirmed!

um, to start off, I just wanna say I dont think this enby coding was intentional or even really coding, it's just moreso me being a dizzee kin on main and knowing as a transmasc enby he has very transmasc enby vibes. for example:

cool, gender neutral nickname that everyone calls him

paints nails various different colors

the whole wardrobe is just a transmasc enby heaven...fishnet shirts, jean overalls, jackets and cuffed pants galore, the big colorful pins, etc

gender neutral hairstyle (when I had my fro it was very sexy and made it easy to transition between hyper masc and vaguely fem, which is pog)

comparing himself to/representing himself consistently with an alien character (though this is meant to represent his sexuality, it could also double as a gender thing too, not neccesarily bc of the whole nonbinary alien trope but bc an enby who likes aliens might heavily identify or compare themselves to whatever their idea of an alien is, whether that just be a genderless entity or a motherfucker with fly style and no need to be perceived as anything other Wacky As Hell)

moving on from there, let's talk about how his queerness is presented to us and how, while it may be a really good piece of representation, especially coming from netflix, it still lacks in A Lot of places.

so, let's start with good things!

i personally really like the get down's queer rep with dizzee bc it's (for the most part) nonsexualized and very very soft, about dizzee figuring himself out and realizing there is a place where he fits in, and about two teenagers in the 70s falling in love over their shared passion for street art. it also features an interracial couple where both boys challenge stereotypes both about queer men and men of color, which is epic poggers and very sexy. this piece of rep specifically is very important to me bc I am a queer black person and even tho interracial relationships are mostly normalized now, I've still had people give me shit for primarily dating white people in a town that is...primarily white lol

mm anyways, I can also appreciate how in the get down, dizzee being represented by rumi the alien is not a thing specifically related to gender (as it often is) and instead is about his sexuality and just in general weirdness and how it has led to him being alienated amongst his peers, poc or otherwise. him seeing himself as an alien is not about just his queerness, which is important, it is about him being a queer black man who talks different, acts different, dresses different and is "soft"—he isnt a walking black male stereotype and he wouldnt have been seen as masculine back in the 70s by any stretch of the imagination. this can be relatable to a wide spectrum of queer poc, from queer black men currently who still have to deal with this shit or to people like myself who are afab neurodivergent mixed race enbies that have always been signaled out as weird and alienated for it. dizzee is god rep bc while he has a small part in this show, his parts are very impactful, hard hitting and show queer poc of all ages that they arent alone and that it's okay to "weird", you just need to embrace it because somebody will love you for you, as thor did for dizzee.

that being said theres um. some minor problemas here,,,

namely:

dizzee and thors first kiss

the lack of development this pairing got

the way dizzee was confirmed bisexual off screen, he never said the words himself, just showed interest in both genders

the way dizzee and thor were never even confirmed boyfriends or just fwb so most of the fandom just calls them boyfriends bc Why Not

dizzee was implied fucking DEAD??? AT THE END OF THE SERIES?????? AND THOR WAS IMPLIED ARRESTED?????????????

now, these might have been things that wouldve been fine had the show been given it's full run but it wasnt which is why we are now left with probelms.

so, from the top, let's go over these: dizzee and thor's first (and only "on screen") kiss was one that was shown in a montage of other queer people making over and doing other vaguely romantic/sexual things, one of those things being a whole ass naked titty being mouthed at, but the actual kiss...was just not shown? like they really did just say "yes they kissed <3 you know this from the context clues of it being in a montage with kissing, hickey giving and titty sucking <3 but no we will not show it <3" LIKE HELLO? I SAW A NAKED BOOBIE BUT NOT TWO MEN KISS??? HUH????????

also, dizzee and thor were both fucking high as hell during this bit like this isnt a terrible thing but it's also like sometimes you do shit when you're high that you wouldnt do sober and they just never kissed again on screen so like?? like idk that's not that bad but it does kinda irk me since they deadass got no other on screen intimacy after that unless you including painting on eacher other or sleeping next to each other on a shitty mattress but not touching at all during it bc they were both at opposite ends of the mattress like half way off it

so yeah, that was trash. then we got lack of development, which kinda goes with the "dizzee being a bisexual but he never says it in canon" thing cause like...okay dizzee was already sort of a side character from the get go like he wasnt the mc by any means, but he became way more of a background character as things continued until we basically only saw him for performances or when he was with thor, yet they got no fucking development as a pairing other than "dizzee realize he gay, he like thor, he and thor spend time together and ig probably do some gay stuff but we dont really know bc we only ever see them do graffiti together now" like?? tf am I supposed to do with that shit. answer. quickly. and then theres dizzee not being confirmed bisexual, which is just a running problem with shows literally doing everything to say a character is bi except for having the character just...say they're bi? which would be so easy? like a good way dizzee and thor couldve had some development is by thor teaching dizzee things about the queer community that he didnt even know existed, thor couldve helped him understand what being bi meant and helped him label himself and whatnot but instead we got an off screen confirmation that the writers had bisexual in mind when writing him. which is garbagé.

the whole thor and dizzee never having a confirmed relationship status is also a development problem cause like literally nobody knows if they were just friends who made out, maybe fucked, who knows, or if they were dating bc dizzee does give a love confession but a love confession doesn't mean there is a relationship, especially since thor didn't say he was in love either (as far as I remember, I could be wrong, plus whether or not that really happened or was apart of dizzee literally overdosing during a performance is unclear so 🤪)

and now for the biggest issue...bury your gays trope.

during the season 2 finale, dizzee and thor are chased by cops after they are found doing graffiti, one of the cops is able to catch thor while the other chases dizzee into a train tunnel and there is a train seen headed straight for him before the show cuts to black on a train horn. the show writers claim that if they had gotten another season, dizzee wouldve been alive but since they didnt and since that's essentially super fan trivia knowledge, most people dont fucking know that and instead had to watch a black queer teenager chose death over being fucking arrested by a white cop. on top of that, thor didnt see any of that shit because he was caught and the cop started hauling him off while dizzee was still being chased so thor literally has no clue where his friend/possible boyfriend fucking is or that he's likely dead in a goddamn tunnel all alone, unless you count the fucking pig that chased him in there who wouldve died too. this shows rep was so fucking good as far as most shows go on not having major fucking problems, on not being toxic and over sexualized, etc, etc. and then they just. killed a black queer teenager for no fucking reason. like it was literally the last episode ever, it would add nothing to the plot, it would just devastate fans and devastate it fucking did. I dont cry easy but seeing a character I identified with, who I had hyperfixated on, die because he'd rather that than be arrested is terrible. it fucking sucked.

so yeah. that's my all too extensive thoughts/analysis on the get down's queerness. theres definitely stuff I missed, or misinterpreted, or looked too much into, etc, etc., but this was a fun thing to spend time writing sooo yeah!! thanks for the ask anon, sorry this was just a big rambley info dump, but hopefully you get some enjoyment out of it since it took like 3 hours at least 😭😭 feel free to ask clarifying questions lol

#shit self #asks #the get down #mylene cruz #shaolin fantastic #dizzee kipling #long post #analysis #info dump #idk if anon has seen tgd or is just being nice so i tried givinh background to things #kinz #bangerz #discourse

75 notes · View notes

justcallmenikki7 · 4 years

Text

BTS Reaction To: You Being on your Period

Yandere!Au

Summary: you start your period and become unusually affectionate and nice, confusing your captor.

Warnings: yander!au, underlying threats, toxic behavior, kidnapping, mentions of murder, fluff? mentions of period bleeding and period cramps, in general reader being on her period

Request:

Hi, ok so, i dont know if this is weird or not but could i plz have yandere bts reaction to the reader (who hasnt been with them for that long of a time) having her first period while with them?💜 oh also that by this time shes actually being nice? Thaaaankkkss💜

W.C: 1.4k

Jin:

You slowly crept towards Jin, nervous to approach him but also in dire need to get some necessities.

“Jin?” You stumbled out nervously, hands interlocking in front of you.

The man makes you nervous – frightened even – so you do not know how this will all go down.

“Yes, love?” Jin hummed, turning around in the counter chair, putting down his reading glasses.

One thing for sure, you know that he is beautiful. But you do know what lies underneath his façade that he puts on.

“I, um, started my period and there is nothing for me used to use.” You blushed, not being able to look him in the eyes. “I was wondering if you could get some for me? Please?”

Even you are surprised that you are being nice to him. Even though he has punished you, he does still treat you right. Ignoring that tingly feeling in your stomach when he gave you a nod, he stood up and grabbed his wallet.

“Would you like anything, such as snack food or…?” Jin asked, putting his jacket on, grabbing his keys in the process.

“Uh, yes! Just, the traditional period snacks. Nothing too big, please.” You answered, looking him in the eyes.

“Okay, I’ll be back.” He came over to you, kissing your forehead. “Just know that if this is a setup, my guards are right outside every entrance and the tracker in your neck will… you remember what happened last time.” Jin warned you, smirking at the scared look.

Yoongi:

Yoongi was right by your side the instant you groaned out in pain in the middle of the night, clutching your stomach tightly.

“Are you okay? What’s wrong? What’s hurting?” Yoongi shook you awake, face morphed into a look of concern and worry.

“My stomach hurts,” you whimpered out, not caring that you are showing weakness to your captor. “Make it stop,” you whined, curling up into his warmth.

“Okay, baby. I got you. It’ll be okay,” he whispered, rolling off of the bed before picking you up bridal style. “Let’s get you set up on the couch with a heating pad and blankets.” Yoongi knew that you were on your period, knowing when your cycle starts and every other medical thing about you. “But first, let’s get you situated with a pad.”

And for the rest of the time, you allowed Yoongi to baby you, loving that you have someone looking after you. You knew that you should not be feeling butterflies and fondness for him, but your emotions and hormones are controlling you right now.

Hoseok:

Hoseok knew that something was different with you when you came and laid your head on his lap while he worked on the computer. Like it was a normal thing, his hand came down to your head, stroking your hair as your curled up to him. He noticed that you were genuinely enjoying his attention, whining whenever he had to use his hand that was stroking your hair to reply to an email.

“Jagi, are you okay?” Hoseok asked after a while.

“Yeah, why?” You reply confusedly, pouting because he stopped stroking your hair.

“Because you’re acting… strange. You hate whenever I touch you,” he bluntly answered, not missing the sad look in your expression.

“Oh, I, I’m sorry,” you whimpered out, tears forming in your eyes. “I’ll leave you alone then.”

Realizing his mistake, Hoseok gripped your hips, pulling you back into him before you could leave. “No, no. I’m sorry. I wasn’t opposed to what you were doing, in fact, I’m ecstatic that you want physical affection. I’m just confused on why.”

Blushing, “I started my period, and I just wanted your attention…”

Smirking, “that I can do, sweetheart.”

Namjoon:

Waking up to the feeling of terrible cramps and feeling yourself bleed heavily onto your underwear was not something you were thrilled about. But once you realized that you were not in your own bed, but in your captors bed with him not even six inches beside you was terrifying and embarrassing. You knew that you had to wake him up, but the thought had you already blushing from embarrassment.

Swallowing down your pride, you reached over to the sleeping man and shook him. “Namjoon, wake up, please,” you whispered. After a few more shakes, the dimpled man woke up.

“What? What is it?” He asked, sitting up abruptly, rubbing his eyes to get the sleep out of them. Looking over at you was all it took to have you breaking down crying. “Y/N, what’s going on?” Namjoon asked softly, leaning over towards you.

“I’m so sorry,” you sobbed out, the embarrassment eating you alive. “I started my period and I bled through. I’m so sorry, Joon.” You did not even realize that you called him ‘Joon.’

“Oh, love, it’s okay. Let’s go get you cleaned up. Maybe, we can go to the doctors tomorrow and get you on medication so you don’t have this… happen again, okay?”

Jimin:

When you became unusually affectionate with Jimin, he could not deny how on cloud nine he was. He basked in your affection and attention to the point where it could be his lifeline. Currently, you did not mind his attention and cuddling, it helped you and your period. Another thing, Jimin gave you belly rubs, helping ease the cramps.

“Jiminie, why are you getting up?” You asked, a sad look on your face. “Why are you leaving me? Am I becoming too much?”

Jimin looked distraught, “No! I just needed to use the bathroom, Jagi. I’ll be right back,” he tried to reassure you.

“So, I’m not being too much?” You tried to hold the smirk you were wanting to show. Yes, you loved Jimin’s attention even though he kidnapped you from your home a month ago, but you loved how submissive he is.

“NO! NEVER!” Jimin yelled loudly, “You’re perfect! I could never get sick of you, baby. You know this.”

Nodding your head, you put on your façade of being confused. “I know, but I just hope that you’re not disgusted by me right now…”

“I could never be disgusted with you baby. Just let me use the restroom and I’ll order us takeout and I’ll do whatever I have to make sure you know how much I love you.”

“Okay, but hurry!”

Once he turned away, you broke out the smirk that you have been holding the whole time, happy to know what power you have over Jimin, ready to use that to your advantage.

Taehyung:

“And here we go,” Taehyung smiled happily, sitting down beside you with a care kit for you.

“Taehyung, you didn’t have to get all of this. I just asked for some Tylenol and a heating pad,” you were overwhelmed with how much Taehyung got you.

“I know, angel, but I want what is best for my angel.” He explained, but his loving look turned into a much darker one, “Are you being ungrateful, angel? Because you know what happens to ungrateful people.”

A shive ran down your spine. “No! I’m just overwhelmed with how much you are doing for me, I’m so grateful that you are doing this for me. No one has ever treated me so kindly and have been so thoughtful.” You admitted, telling him the truth.

The dark look left Taehyung’s face so quickly that it gave you whiplash. “I know, angel. That is why I took you away from your evil life and brought you here, to protect you.”

Smiling back at him, hating how much you are falling for him. Leaning up, you gave him a kiss on his cheek – you know, for good measure.

Jungkook:

Swallowing your pride, you walked to Jungkook’s office to get the affection that you know that he would give you. You tried so hard to be strong and get through your period, but the downfall is, you become clingy and in need for affection. For belly/back rubs, cuddles, someone to play with your hair – anything that can get you through these seven torturous days of hell.

Jungkook sat at his desk, glasses on the bridge of his nose and tie loose around his neck. He was so undeniably attractive, but you knew the monster that lived underneath the façade, the killer. You hated him, or that is what you tell yourself. He killed your best friend and brother in order for you to stay with him. But sometimes, he makes you second guess that.

“Princess, what are you doing out of bed?” Jungkook asked, taking off his glasses, leaning back into his desk chair.

“I-uh,” you swallowed, “can you please cuddle? Unless you’re busy with work! I’m just, I’m not feeling good,” you stumbled, looking down at your feet.

“Awe, princess is acting like a princess and not some ungrateful brat. Hm, what a change. But sure, come here,” he motioned for you, to which you followed.

1K notes · View notes

professor-catalpa · 3 years

Note

Hi professor! i'm from Johto, and i was wondering what your thoughts on that Team Plasma gang are? i heard about them in the news, and at first, i kinda thought they had a point.

The situation's a bit more nuanced than you'll likely see on the news in your region, so I understand what you mean. For the sake of anyone who hasn't been keeping up (or in case your news outlet hasnt covered all the details), I'll try and briefly summarize what's been happening in Unova:

An organization known as Team Plasma has been gaining power in the region recently, championing for the release of "captive" Pokemon forced to do our bidding. Though their core philosophy has indeed caused some discussion and consideration, most Unovans are agreed that Plasma's methods have not been acceptable and, if any change is to happen along these lines, it can't be championed by an organization like theirs. From Pokemon theft to harassment of trainers and their Pokemon to the attempted capture of multiple Legendary Pokemon, their PR couldn't get much worse. Nontheless, the power of their ideals has lead many young Unovans to join them, and many worry for the future of the region.

Personally, I don't completely disagree with them. Through my interactions with local trainers, I've pushed for treating Pokemon as partners rather than tools, including giving them autonomy in whether or not they wish to battle; this sentiment is shared by all Professors I've met. We at Entralink and the board of WPSD expand this philosophy to work Pokemon in general, and working with each Pokemon as an individual is at the center of all we do. That being said, we are unfortunately not representative of all human-Pokemon relations. There are many cases in which Pokemon are made to fight or work without their consent, or in unsafe conditions. Even well-meaning trainers can overestimate their Pokemon's power, leading to tragedy. The ever-expanding metropolitan areas of Unova displace shier native species; some species, like Snivy, are thought to be extinct in the wild and only exist through parks' breeding programs. These situations are, perhaps, not an unavoidable part of life; it's a discussion we need to have, and I am glad to be part of the discussion in some small way.

However, I do not believe Team Plasma have been a force for good in our world. Two months ago, a sage and a handful of grunts raided a research institution's lab and stole each and every Pokemon that had been residing there. Those Pokemon were trained by our own park, and not one of them that did not share their partner's commitment to the work made it to that lab. Most of the Pokemon they stole were simply released into the wild-- Mostly Pokemon that had lived their entire lives, from egg to adult, in the care of humans, and had not a single survival instinct in them. This is not a humane way to care for our partners. Just as worryingly, many of the stolen Pokemon were simply divided among members of their organization to use in battle! These Pokemon are researchers, scientists; we taught them enough to defend themselves in an emergency, but none of them had been in a real battle in their lives! To force Pokemon into such situations unwillingly tells me that they do not truly believe in their cause, and unfortunately situations like this have been increasingly common throughout our region.

This isn't to say I believe all Team Plasma members are callous Pokemon thieves, as some have suggested; most seem to be misguided, naive youths who aren't considering the implications of their actions. Whoever is organizing them, though, I can't say I trust.

[ This blog takes place in slightly before the protagonists of BW begin their journey; some events of BW may be referenced but for my own sanity I'll be taking some liberties with how to fit Cat into the region's timeline! ]

#team plasma #ask #lore

16 notes · View notes

detectivedeckerstar · 4 years

Text

Heaven, Hell and Earth time

So we know that hell time goes by much slower in comparison the earth (general theories based on the show seem to be about 1 earth month= 1000 hell years, making 1 earth day= ~33 hell years).

My theory is that heaven is the opposite. I don't think i have any real proof of it but allow me to explain my thought process.

My original foundation for the idea is simply just because it's the opposite of hell. I don't think it's the exact opposite time difference, because that wouldn't fit with Amenadiel's trip there between s3 and s4. He said he "went home for a bit" which was equated to just over a month on earth. His explanation is super vague so we can't really tell.

The only other reference we have to heaven time is Michael. He was "up there, doing his thing" and heard about Lucifer going back to hell, yet it took 2 months for him to take on Lucifer's life. I suppose that could be explained by him needing to time to form his evil plan, but also why wait like 2 months. He could come back after a month or smth too and still say it's been a thousand years for him to justify all the changes. One explanation might be that time in heaven goes faster, so that was as soon as he could get down here.

Also just in the grand scheme of things, like hell is eternal torture, heaven is supposed paradise. I think most people associate the slowing of time with agony and the quick passage of time with fun. For example "the seconds dragged on" is like a common phrase to describe anxiousness or stress vs. "time flies when your having fun" is used to describe how fast time seems to pass when you're enjoying yourself. We don't really know what heaven is like in the show's universe, but if it's anything to do with finding peace with your loved ones, wouldn't it make sense if you didn't have to wait so long to be joined by them?

My last thought would also equate for Lucifer's constant use of "millennia", which generally means thousand. In reality, we've recorded the universe to be 13.8 billion years old. Now it's possible that the angels have actually been alive that long, or close to it. The earth is 4.5 billion years old, which would mean there was around 9 billion years before earth was created. So, it seems like majority of even Lucifer's life was spent in heaven before God started working on humanity and then kicked him out.

SO all of that being said, it would make a lot of sense if heaven time actually goes by much faster in heaven so it wasn't actually 13 billion years for them. I've always thought Lucifer's use of "millennia" to be like an under exaggeration cuz he likes using that word. He does also use "eons" though, which often means a really long time, but in some cases it is directly quantified at a billion. He tells Chloe is 4x01 that he's had "literal eons to come to terms with his devilshness", which could suggest it's been at least a few billion years since he got kicked out (that could also be misconstrued by his slowed time in hell).

It could, however, also be a situation like Good Omens where they say human record is wrong and it hasnt actually been that long.

Anyway, thanks for listening to my rant, i didn't think it would be this long, but here we are! Feel free to add any other thoughts or points, in favour or against!

#lucifer morningstar #lucifer #lucifer season 5 #deckerstar #chloe decker #detective chloe decker #lucifer on netflix #lucifer season 4 #heaven #hell #lucifer timeframe #lucifer timeline

29 notes · View notes

mousehole5000 · 4 years

Text

tgcf chapters 107 - 120 this is one where i give some Opinions. i do overall like hualian a lot but i have some quibbles

wait why am i still taking screenshots? i can copy/paste again afskldfjasad

It really was hard to tell whether people would feel happy after watching such performances. However, in truth, slaughter and the sight of blood did create excitement in people. Whether or not there was fear, after the initial shock was over, a rush of adrenaline would be produced in the heart- me watching horror movies

“Shi Qingxuan said. “Then, Your Highness, Crimson Rain Sought Flower! I order you to—to immediately strip each other’s clothing!” - djslkadjlsd WHY DID HE SPECIFICALLY SAY THEY HAD TO STRIP EACH OTHER THISALSKDJ is this a normal thing is it a wingman attempt what is happening

“I’ll tell you what it is,” he said softly. “To watch with your own eyes your beloved be trampled and ridiculed, yet be unable to do anything. That’s the worst suffering in the world.” ... “Ming Yi asked, “What’s the biggest regret of your life?”- when truth or dare gets a bit too real

On the side, Hua Cheng was still only observing, and was already bored to the point where he’d changed back into his red robes. Then he changed to black robes again. Then to white robes. Almost every time Xie Lian looked back, he would be donning a different appearance, and with every new look there were different hairstyles, and different accessories, and different boots, and so on; sometimes playful, sometimes elegant, sometimes deadly, sometimes glamourous. Xie Lian was growing dizzy from all the colours and kept looking back, unable to look away. - THIS ISNT THE TIME HUA CHENG. YOURE PRIMPING. THE WINDMASTER HAS BEEN KIDNAPPED AND YOURE PRIMPING

obsessed with xie lian not being able to figure out to use the windmaster’s fan and just. using it to SMACK

also windmaster??? whats going on??? :( i know some things from spoilers like who is not to be trusted but i really have no clue whats happening rn

anyways back to puqi shrine lets check on those kids also can we PLEASE get some funds for this restoration smh. hua cheng and xie lian doing mundane hard labor together to fulfill prayers.... :pleading:

jailbreak in the heavens 2: dig a tunnel

Sure enough, the moment Ming Yi put pressure on his shovel, a hole opened up before them. With the shovel raised, he burrowed crazily ahead while Shi Qingxuan, in the middle, cheered him on crazily. As the only non-crazy person, Xie Lian brought up the rear. That treasured shovel of the Earth Master was indeed magical, and with only a few strokes, a new tunnel of over ten meters was dug. - anybody remember mulch diggums from the artemis fowl series? this is much more dignified than that but i think this is only the second time ive read a character just starting digging a tunnel as a plot point

okay so much is going on i wish i hadnt spoiled who certain characters actually are for myself but i have no one to blame but me for a) not blacklisting spoilers at all and b) just having a little freefall through the tags. oh well. anyway heavenly college admissions scandal except way worse. the corruption extends to the heavens and the windmaster is having a very bad day

i guess we’re having a high seas adventure now?

im gonna keep it real im getting tired of how often we get told how handsome hua cheng is. i know its all xie lian’s pov and while im not terribly familiar with it i know what genre we’re working with and im assuming thats pretty typical. its something i dont much care for in general and idk maybe it sounds better in the original but ngl its starting to make me roll my eyes. love you goth king but god okay we get it.

i guess what i will say about hualian so far is that overall i like them and i like how they interact in general they have a lot of nice moments and they just genuinely seem to like each other which is really nice to see EXCEPT for when it actually comes to things that could be romantic or sexual which is a shame bc i dont think it has to be like this. again disclaimer that im only reading a translation and dont know everything might not have all the knowledge necessary to accurately criticize etc etc and im assuming a lot of this is expected from the genre (disclaimer to this disclaimer that i cant say that for sure its just based on things ive picked up about the bl genre over the years) but idk like xie lian was so distressed after their underwater kiss scene. it was kind of uncomfortable to read and maybe im being unfair i know his cultivation is based around abstinence or whatever but idk i dont care for it. and that scene alone doesnt have to be a bad thing like idk i guess its his first kiss ever (?) and it would make sense if he feels weird about it but i just have my doubts thats going to be addressed or resolved in a satisfying way. also im like. dude everyone is like centuries old. xie lian’s been on earth for 800 years. has he really never met or heard of a gay person during all this time? maybe he hasnt idk what he got up to yet maybe that’s actually a thing. also same thing with the reactions from the immortals to xie lian in a dress and characters like the windmaster like again you’re all centuries old and its not uncommon to be able to just completely change gender presentation. why are you all weird about a man wearing a woman’s dress? i just feel like that shouldnt be a big deal to these characters idk

also again not going to lie part of this that im not really a big fan of reading romance in general. yes i am reading this book. yes i do read and write a lot of fanfic that includes or centers romance. im multifaceted. but really what im talking about is the like physical side of it and descriptions im extremely picky about it. ill give an example. early on in the torture pit (or whatever it was called i cant remember lol) when xie lian kind of accidentally felt up hua cheng in the dark when he was being carried. i dont think thats a bad thing to have happen between the two romantic leads i think thats fine and good to include that early but i just did not enjoy reading it when it happened idk maybe it was the wording and i do think that moments like these work better in a visual medium. ive definitely read het romance that reads like this and i wasnt a fan of that either lol same with fanfic i get tired when writers go on and on about how hot one characters finds another character. this isnt a huge criticism of it like i said im picky but again like with the way that hua cheng is described it just makes me roll my eyes sorry kings

okay back to the reading. this whole saving the fishermen thing feels like a big set up for something narrative-wise. hua cheng specifically insisted on coming and i know one of the characters involved ends up dying im wondering if thats now it would be a good time tbh if things get just a bit too unfortunate during this heavenly calamity... and the brothers are notably not having a harmonious time... also tho it feels very likely we’ll just have another Hualian Moment (tm)

In such a situation, Pei Ming still acted the same. In the evening, when they rescued a few fishermen girls, so scared their eyes were blurry from tears, he held them in his embrace and soothed them with a gentle voice; a true show of honeyed romance, affectionate and charming. - pei ming please get pickled again.

also its funny that hua cheng is just kinda hanging out and everyone else just has to deal with it

Looking down from above, the entire area was painted in a terrifying black. It was easy to see the collision between the two different-coloured currents. Their fierce battle was what formed this enormous whirlpool. As the eye swallowed the ship whole, the two currents of water separated. However, the battle was far from over. Like two venomous vipers, they continued to snap at each other. Each collision was followed by a mountain of angry waves. - this pretty dope ngl. also love our wind and earth masters just chilling on a shovel i dig it. hehe

Yet, other than discovering Hua Cheng had a fine body, there were no other finds. Xie Lian was at his wit’s end and started to worry. - okay see this one’s funny im just also irritated bc im like WE KNOW!!! WE GET IT HE’S HOT AND XIE LIAN THINKS HE’S HOT OKAY GOT IT

okay kiss #2 again its not the kisses themselves its xie lian’s reaction it just bothers me idk im not saying i need him to be super into it and completely unconflicted about it rn but he’s just so freaked out about it and idk i just dont really like it just feels weird i dont care for that aspect of it. also dude hua cheng is a ghost and he did this exact same thing for you before just chill. i wish instead of xie lian literally running away while screaming that hes sorry he was just like “oh haha youre fine thats cool im gonna go look around the woods i dont feel weird about this at all haha” like idk its kind of funny but when its literally our two romantic leads i just feel like its confusing like it kind of makes me feel like they shouldnt be together if one of them freaks out this much again considering the fact that they are both CENTURIES old. i know i know xie lian is an 800 year old virgin but. he hasn’t been like this about anything else so yeah idk like it still could have been awkward and funny i just dont think it needed to be so :/ that being said it was funny that xie lian was then internally like “oh i did it wrong? perhaps i should ask him for more.. instructions....” if that actually happens i might like it bc it would complete this little watery theme

Before he finished, he immediately remembered. Coffin wood. There were trees here everywhere; and a deceased? There was one right before his eyes. Sure enough, Hua Cheng smiled. “Won’t it be fine once I lie inside? - love that hua cheng just sat on the fact that he can turn anything into a coffin. that would have been really useful information earlier but no he just waited until everyone but xie lian was gone afjaklsdjf

also i do think that oblivious xie lian thinking “wow whoever it is that hua cheng fancies is an idiot for not liking him back theyre totally taking him for granted :/” is kind of funny and sweet. actually the whole conversation they have at the campfire is good and im bookmarking it to think about later

“...You on top and me on the bottom,” Xie Lian replied. “Isn’t top and bottom the same?” Hua Cheng asked. - okay im sorry but. mood whenever theres discourse about top/bottom dynamics for a ship im just like jesus christ i dont care. tbh i rarely read fanfiction if its just sexual and ngl if i see a fic specifically tag characters as top or bottom i wont read it lmfao. especially when people have really strong opinions about this stuff when theres nothing canonical to back it up like headcanon all you want but whenever i see people argue about it im just like no offense but go work out your own sexual issues and dynamics instead of arguing with strangers on the internet about who’s a top and who’s a bottom. sorry to be mean but just thats how i feel lol

this was mostly a ramble with a few excerpts but im getting sleepy im going to TRY to take a break from this for like a day but we’ll see how that goes i do very much want to know what happens. anyway if you read this whole thing hiiiiii sorry for subjecting you to my opinions on top/bottom discourse

#minors dni #reading this is weird its like wow this is pretty great actually im having a blast #and then there's these moments that are like...... hmmmm.#idk they havent been awful i just think theyre :/#still funny tho ill give it that #tgcf liveblog

11 notes · View notes

sablesides-writing-corner · 4 years

Note

Psst.. The Little Mermaid And Romas?

Roman was a singer, he knew that much, but at heart he was an anthropologist, and that took precedence over concerts any day. This particular evening Roman had decided was as good a time as any to explore the abandoned ship wreck east of the kingdom with his brother.

"There might be sharks! Or a giant squid!" Remus said.

"You're a giant squid," Roman said, nudging him to the side.

"I now! That's why I hope we meet one!" Remus said, spinning ina circle and spreading out his tentacles. Roman rolled his eyes and flicked his tail.

"Come on, we've got a ship to explore," Roman said, shooting through a hole that used to be a window. Remus followed, only for his lower half to get stuck. Roman yanked him the rest of the way through and went on his way exploring.

They had amassed a large summary of items before the rude intrusion of a very large and hungry shark, retreating to the surface in their escape.

"That was close," said Roman.

Remus shook his hair out "Yeah! And it was awesome!" he responded enthusiastically.

"We should check with Patton to see what these are," said Roman.

Patton, a stout man with the wings of a bird, was Roman's only ticket to information about the surface. Thought he wasnt exactly very good at it.

"And this one looks like a dinglehopper!" holding up what, to anyone who knew even the most basic details of human culture, was clearly a fork.

"What's it for?" Roman said, leaning his head on his arms.

"The humans use it to brush their hair!" Patton said, demonstrating on his own.

"Woah," Roman said, Remus merely laughed.

"Well we've gotta get going before dad notices we're missing," Roman said.

"Well come back soon!" Patton said, watching the duo disappear beneath the waves.

"The surface! Of all the places to skip out on a concert for! The surface!" King Romulus was fuming, so much in fact that there were bubbles forming near his head.

"It was only to see Patton! We didnt go near any ships!" Roman tried to explain, but the situation only seemed to worsen.

"That's it, I've had enough of you two and this surface-world nonsense. Virgil! Watch them." a short purple-haired merman swam out from behind the throne.

"Of course, sire-" he said, swimming between the twins. The trio left the throne room, Remus annoyed, and Roman angry and dismayed.

They were distracted momentarily by the appearance of brightly colored flashes of light above the water. Before Remus and Virgil could stop him, Roman was charging towards the source of the light. A large, elaborately designed boat.

"Roman you get back here! Dont even think about going near that boat!" Virgil called. But Roman was already climbing up to an opening at the side of the ship.

The ship was completely full of humans, dancing, singing, and causing general amounts of party related ruckus. But what really caught the young merman's eye was a the man at the center of it all, tall, muscular, with brown hair and eyes. What looked to be a labrador was dancing at his heels, until it noticed Roman's face peaking through the ship. Before he could duck, his face was covered in dog slobber.

"Hey! Hey! Easy girl- easy," the man brought away the dog, and seemed to stall a bit as he examined Roman's face. He was about to open his mouth to speak when a voice called for a man named Thomas, at which he promptly retreated. Roman took the opportunity to retreat back into the water.

"Roman that was stupid! You couldve been killed!" said Virgil.

"Oh but you shouldve seen him! He was so tall and handsome and he looked like he could hoist me into the air with one arm!" Roman said, holding his hands to his heart.

"Oh dont tell us you fell in love with a human!" Remus said, grinning cheekily.

Roman was about to defend himself, when lightning stuck behind them. He whipped around only to see the ship which held his beloved going down in flames. He raced under the water and thrashed around looking for him. He finally located his knight in shining armor and dashed to his side, heaving with all the strength he could muster to get to the surface. He stayed by Thomas'side until he noticed the prince's eyes begin to flutter. The song he'd been singing faltered, and he darted back into the water before he could be noticed. He watched as a taller man with a scar across his face approached his prince, draping a cloak over his shoulders and guiding him to a castle. Roman retreated back into the water, where Remus and Virgil awaited him.

"Of all the ignorant stupid boar-headed things you couldvw done! Why in all of Atlantis would you go after him!" Virgil said.

"Hes in love Virgil let him make stupid decisions if he wants," Remus said, cackling. Roman merely glared at him.

He and Remus finally lost the distressed merman in Roman's favorite hideout, the grotto. Within it was a statue of Roman's prince, a prize won after the storm.

"Sooooo- tell me about him- does he look like he'd taste good cooked over a volcano?" Remus laughed.

"Oh be quiet!" Roman snapped. He went on about the love of his life for several hours before the atmosphere seemed to change.

"A human?" Roman's spine seemed to go rigid.

"H-Hello- father-" he said. Remus' eyes widened. Roman hid behind the statue.

"My own son, in love with a human?" King Romulus' voice seemed to echo, causing different trinkets to fall to the bottom of the cove. There was a flash of light, and Roman's treasures were destroyed. All that was left of the rampage was the face of the statue. Roman stared at his father, shock, fear, and sadness evident on his face. Before his own brother could call out for him he'd left the cove, much to far away to hear their pleas.

He'd been crying against the rocks for who knew how long, when he heard voices.

"Poor thing,"

"Broken heart, he must feel horrible,"

Roman looked up, two mereels were circling above him.

"What do you want?" he said, wiping his face off.

"Oh you poor child, we only want to help you!" said the first.

"And we know just what you need, and just who can do it," said the second. The two held their hands out, Roman hesitated, before reaching his own out.

He was taken to what seemed like the rotting carcass of a whale.

"In here, in here, she wont bite," said the eels.

"Who've you brought me now?" said a gentle voice. Roman swam further into the home, to be met with a woman in front of a mirror, blue and purple hair framing her face.

"A prince!"

"Prince Roman!"

The eels chattered on, the woman turned around. She was small, she looked kind.

"Hestia, a pleasure to meet you," she said.

"Now it's my understanding that you're in love with a human yes?" Hestia smiled, the once white lines across her body shifting to an odd shade of pinkish-red.

"Yes but- I havent got any way to pay-" Hestia held a finger to his lips to shut him up.

"Oh the payment wont be much, a token really! All I want from you is. . . your voice," she said, smiling.

"My voice?" Roman replied.

"Only for a little, my brother Remy hasnt one of his own, you'll only have to go three days without it, that is if you get a kiss from your prince before sunset on the third," the lines shifted to a gold color. Roman was barely focussing on that, to busy thinking of the kiss.

"Alright- my voice- I'll do it," Roman said.

Hestia grinned, "Good, Remy! come here darling!" she called. A younger merman with sunglasses and brown hair swam out of the back, twisting a necklace in his hands.

"Now, as for you, sing," Hestia said, pointing at Roman. He did as told, felt something rise in his throat, and then he couldnt breath. He couldn't see or hear, he felt like he was dying. He heard laughter, female laughter. Someone dragged him to the surface, and he let out a sharp inhale.

"Roman! Roman! Stay with me!" Remus said, shaking Roman's head from side to side.

Roman coughed and tried to respond, but nothing came out.

"You signed away your voice you idiot!" Virgil said, as though this wasn't immediately obvious to everyone on the beach. Remus was about to interject when they heard a voice, Thomas' voice. Virgil quickly spun a piece of cloth around Roman's body, and he and Remus fled into the ocean.

"I mean he acts like I'm a child! It's not my fault the ship-" Thomas paused upon noticing Roman, who smiled at him delightedly.

"Well hello there, and who might you be?" Thomas said, helping Roman out of the water. He stumbled a bit and fell forward into Thomas' arms.

He tried to respond, but to no avail, Thomas seemed concerned by this.

"Are you alright? Can you not speak?" Thomas said. Roman nodded, the smile he got in return was enough to make his heart melt.

"Well, let's get you warmed up then, off to the castle we go," Thomas said.

It was a cozy affair his first night at the castle, warm by the fire with Thomas telling him stories. He seemed entranced by how the firelight danced in Roman's eyes.

The next day Thomas took him out into the town, he wished he couldve laughed at all of Thomas' jokes. Late that night they sat in a boat,music playing from all sides, familiar faces popping up every now and again

Roman had barely noticed Thomas' face close to his own until they were thrown out of the boat by a mysterious force.

The third day was by far the worst. Roman had awoken to find Thomas gone, to marry a man he said had saved him from death.Roman had watched as the ship sailed off, until three voices piped up.

"Roman! Roman it's the sea witch's brother! Hes stealing your man!" Remus said. Virgil and Patton nodded along side him. It took a fair bit of planning time before they could reach the boat, but by the time the trick had been realized, Roman felt something in himself change. He felt, again, like he was dying.

"Poor princey, no kisses for you hm?" Hestia's voice came from the water, she rose out of it, a familiar weapon in her hands.

"You like it? It's a birthday present from your father," she said, laughing so loud the ship trembled.

"What do you want from him!" Thomas yelled, dragging Roman closer to himself.

"Dont you talk to me like that! I'm going to rule all seven seas! And the likes of you wont stop me!" Hestia growled, bringing the trident down between the ship, causing it to begin to sink. Lifeboats crashed into the water, Roman fled under as well, attempting to reach the sea witch. He thought he'd snuck past her when he was pinned to the sea floor by the trident, a whirlpool beginning to form.

"Now you get to see what it felt like to be me! Disgraced, a shame to my family! Left for dead in the relentless waves of the ocean!" Hestia snarled. Roman felt static on all sides, and then nothing at all. A large object had fallen in front of him, Hestia, dead. Her brother backing away from the body, holding up what looked to be a broken down shipwreck. Roman popped his head above the water, Thomas was smiling at him.

It took nearly half a day to explain what had happened to King Romulus, and longer still to get him to calm down about Roman and Thomas' idea for marriage. But eventually, he conceded, and Roman was allowed to happily marry his prince charming, and live peacefully with him in their castle by the ocean.

#cori answers #little mermaid au #romantic romas #romas #ts virgil #ts patton #ts roman #ts character thomas #ts remus #ts remy #hestia sable

10 notes · View notes

og-danny-dorito · 4 years

Note

Male XMen&MCU matchup pls? SFW&NSFW!5’1 she/her,petite/slim,long straight dark hair&dark eyes,Taurus&ISFJ. Social introvert. Intellectual&passionate about improving lives. Scared easily. Insomniac. I get stressed/anxious&overthink but don't give up. Dorky,awks,silly-like to laugh&make others laugh. Sassy-teases/roasts. Empathetic&super supportive. Romantic, says I love you often&loves hugs/cuddles. Emotional&cries easily b/c I care so much. Likes: karaoke, eating/cooking&board/video games.🦊

of course! oddly enough you seem to go well with the rugged lumberjack types, I'm actually kinda jealous 😂 (also please pardon any errors, i didnt proofread that thoroughly)

I Ship You With... Wolverine and Bucky Barnes!

- okay well fiRST of all my mans Logan is essentially your soulmate

- there are just so many things that you share in common and traits that compliment each other that its hard to deny that you were technically made for each other

- for instance, your personalities may seem like the polar opposite on the surface, but deep down you really do fit each other like puzzle pieces. Logan is mostly an introvert himself and tends to stress over things a lot, even though he never really makes it obvious. your bubbly and warm attitude makes him feel more generally talkative somehow, and your teasing is always met back with an equally snarky response

- and he also kinda likes that you can take things less seriously (he takes things WAY too seriously sometimes- not even blowing things out of proportion just considering them more lethal than they actually are under the guise of assuming a larger threat beneath the surface) usually he’ll actively seek you out when he needs to release streets. not to vent or talk abut himself since he adamantly refuses to do that, but just because being around you feels like things arent really all that bad.that he doesnt need to worry so much

- your affectionate nature is also great! you see, Logan never really displays affection because he doesnt really crave it all that much and ALSO doesnt like feeling that vulernarble around people he doesnt trust, but you’re one of the few exceptions he’ll allow to that strict “No Touching” rule

- its not like he’ll actively seek out your touch cause hes like, definitely not touch starved or anything, but a good way to know that he’d like to have some Affection™ is the signature long-glances-from-across-the-room or surprisingly-soft-manner-of-speaking or, and this is my personal favorite, lingering-touches-on-your-hands

- he tends to exhibit this behavior most commonly when you’re both laying in bed, alone. due to both having insomnia you’re probably awake most of the time anyway, so what better to do then talk aimlessly while you run your fingers through his hair and/or he latches onto you like an entire koala

- good thing is that he can be big spoon during the Scehduled 3am Affection Time since you’re a few inches shorter than him, rather than being the little spoon he’s been with most of the partners taller than him.its surprisingly a nice change of pace, and hes p good at his job at being amoving heat source

- overal 8/10 boyfriend rating, very good teddy bear but takes a while to be emotionally open

- BUCKY however.

- like Logan, he’s not very expressive, but he also hasnt really had many healthy relationships (or relationships at all tbh) and so being given positive affection that isnt for sex...?

- yes, hand it over, immediately

- probably panics a little when you’re hugging him because he automatically has the instinct to defend himself cause he thinks hes being attacked, but once he notices your 5′1″ munchkin self hugging up around his wait while he waters your collective “children” (yes, he calls the plants you’ve adopted together his children cause he wants kids and no i dont take constructive criticism)

- once he realized he isn't being apprehended however?? he kinda tears up. Its not really intentional- he isnt able to keep his emotions in check in this situation cause he just feels so vulernable. so without a word he just picks you up and holds you there for a second so you can put your head on his shoulder.yes your legs are dangling, no you cannot be let go of now

- he probably craves and outwardly pursues the most affection out of the two dudes listed here, but he always feels like its an honor to even touch you and will NOT do so without asking first cause hes Baby™ and respects boundaries

- in return though he has a bunch of boundaries himself. ptsd has caused him to be a bit socially awkward amongst other things, and so he might need you to take the lead in social interactions when you do go out to talk to other people he might not know. thank god you’re both introverted, being out with others all the time makes him really anxious

- your empathetic nature helps him feel more secure since yknow, he kinda stumbles over his words when trying to explain what hes thinking since his thoughts tend to be erratic and jumbles sometimes. he like the feeling of not having to explain incorrectly and usually just silently holds your hand or lays on your lap when hes feeling bad

- you’ve also taught him how to be better, in some ways.he views you genuinely as a blessing he doesn't deserve and treats you as such, and tends to silently admire your traits all the time. have you ever seen those “stolen personality traits” memes? yeah that’s him like a month into meeting you or living with you or whatever

- dude will steal your jokes even though his delivery is different, say some of your vocal frequents, or even start to carry himself similarly.its subconscious, and he denies it when pressed

- overal 8/10, very sweet boy very kind but cannot for the life of him excercise some godamn self care

[ ~Thank You For Reading!~ ]

3 notes · View notes

doctorguilty · 5 years

Text

ok you’ve all been waiting for it my thoughts on the sonic movie!!!

under cut cause long

so overall! I really liked the movie! I think it sorta landed pretty in the ballpark of what I sorta expected quality-of-plot wise and how much I’d be entertained by it. which is satisfying!!! I’m going to like, stream of thought this, starting with some criticisms which are gonna be kinda hefty cause im critiquing something I care about

so right away I really disliked the “record scratch so this is me I bet you’re wondering how I got in this situation” opening like I’m not sure if it was intentionally a self aware joke on that being cliche and dumb but it does like, really frustrate me cause my philosophy for most stories is Start your story where it begins!! which made the backstory infodump more frustrating on top of that, like, I think that’s an easy mistake to make to want to spill your Backstory right away but it’s not necessary! the audience doesn’t NEED to know immediately what sonic was like in his homeworld and his tragic separation from it. we already have the audiences suspension of disbelief in play because they know they’re watching.. a movie about sonic the hedgehog in the real world. I think the backstory stuff would have been much more impactful as a flashback later on, especially when sonic’s whole arc is how lonely and isolated he is. it would be a better punch in the heart to later on be like so by the way as a child his guardian probably died and sent him to earth for his own safety. so that was like AUGH you blew it

next up that i think was unnecessary like, completely, was establishing that sonic already knew the main cop guy and his wife (omg I already forgot their names..because they were not memorable but we’ll get to that fjdsg) and like, secretly immersed himself into their life that’s ?? odd to me? I think it would have been fine to just have sonic be like attached to the whole small town and he thinks the cop is cool and calls him donut lord, and that’s the extent of it like cause the problem is later down the plot when sonic finds out cop guy is leaving green hills and flips out about it.. I’m like, not sure if I believe sonic, immersing himself in their life, had NOT known that was a thing cop guy wanted to do like he NEVER heard about that??? but that’s like whatever

I don’t really like the cop guy as the protag human like. oof he was very bland and I’m trying to figure out how to put this into words............ I feel like a character like him isn’t someone the audience can really connect to. this guy has a virtually perfect life with a house and a dog and a job and a wife, his Conflict is that he wants to move to california and see more action and save people, but the WEIRDEST thing about it is that the prospect of leaving his little town behind isn’t really shaking him up at all. it shakes SONIC up later, but up until that point.... the cop just has legit a perfect life and it’s kinda sad because sonic appearing in it physically becomes something that immediately has the effect of “starting to ruin it” and thats why the cop is so like, mean about things at first.

see I don’t really like that it doesn’t make a lot of sense to me. if I were to rewrite this keeping the general ideas in mind, I would have opted for a ... paul blart crossed with judy hopps. a guy who’s life isn’t all in order, maybe not living in trash but he doesn’t have a wife, he DREAMS of being a cop and saving people, but he doesn’t quite have what it takes physically/mentally or maybe he’s too afraid to even try. he loves his rural town but thinks like, maybe if I move to the big city I’ll find myself maybe he’s offered a job there for something boring and is like resigning to a boring life idk there’s a lot you can do but you get the idea! a lonely underdog with big dreams. so when Sonic comes into his life, its WAY more impactful to paul hopps.....judy blart...... that Sonic pleads for help saving his life and this sudden adventure isn’t ruining his life either.

then LATER when we get to sonic being upset that paul hopps wants to leave, it’s less this awkward confrontation “how dare you wanna live your already in motion dreams somewhere ELSE because people love you HERE” (like .. oof bad take tbh) it would be a much nicer “why do you want to leave your home to become a hero when everyone here already sees you as one” and instead of the shabby like “well I guess I’ll stay because i crossed off saving someone from my bucket list” paul hopps would feel fulfilled he saved sonic and I actually you know what? I’d change up the whole scene with the turtle to be at the end where paul hopps becomes a cop in green hills and he like, saves a turtle crossing the road and is like! that’s what its all about being a hero! like thats cute and resonates with an audience, the message like, being a hero just means being kind and doing the right thing, which is way more suitable for a sonic movie when the sonic series has always been a campy power of friendship thing.

in a similar vein, the cop being a lonely underdog would give him a better connection with sonic, so that even if he was annoyed by him at first he’d later have the understanding they’re one in the same, you know? connections people!! themes!!!!

anyway but enough of that au

so the last thing I’m like iffy about is how robotnik was handled. like jim carry is funny and stuff but it felt like a bit of a mess like, this character is repeatedly reminding us what a hard ass I’M SUPERIOR THAN YOU MY IQ IS HUGE but then being super mega goofy, like I’m all for eccentric scientists but it felt kind of disconnected? and idk like not to be that guy but man.. i remember when sonic 06 came out and everyone hated how eggman was slimmed down to what he looked like in that game jfkdfsgksdj like my brain really doesn’t find a fully slender bodied eggman palatable like......... let my mans be fat ... WHICH tbh I’m a little nervous because at the end of the movie we see this implication that robotnik is turning more visually into the eggman we know with the stache and bald head but I’m worried they’re gonna also go with “and he also gets fat” cause I don’t like that sort of thing, you know?

i think that’s all for my major criticisms!! but otherwise like! the movie was genuinely really fun and goofy and it felt very in spirit with the sonic franchise!

if you read bogleech’s post I agree with him whole heartedly that this is the best characterization of sonic. it feels almost like?????? the characterization he was MEANT To have but he always ended up going TOO MUCH in the direction of confident and cocky and being too cool and successful about it? I love sonic with that hyper teenager-like personality, it’s incredibly charming and cute, like I never Hated sonic as a character but he was defs like... lower on my list of characters in the franchise I found interesting. I felt like I could connect with movie sonic a lot and like! i’d want to be his friend, you know? I really really want to see more of him like that!

I also agree big time that the movie had the best use of bullet time I’ve ever seen! I’m like omg?? WHY hasnt that ever been a mechanic in a game?

and overall just like the cuteness like............I literally almost cried when the little girl gave sonic her shoes like AAAAAAAAAAAAA WEEPS............ and the end with sonic getting his own room thats so super cute too!!!!

oh and the post credits scene with tails was SO FUCKING HYPE like, people in the theater audibly gasped and started being like YESSSSSSS tails looks really great!

so like YEAH dabs ,, being a story snob aside it was a fun and cute movie and I’m glad to hear it trumped detective pikachu for a video game movie I’m glad it’s brought some attention to the sonic franchise! like while it’s cool in some aspects that Nerd Culture is mainstream now, it’s absolutely exhausting the HUGE focus on that is marvel and DC and all that stuff........ like theres nothing wrong w/ liking that but its like.. hm.... idk how to explain it but................. as someone who was bullied a lot in school for liking things like sonic.. like I guess stuff like that people usually see as lame stuff for babies??? superheroes are more like, macho and palatable to adults?? it’s been a good experience for all my normie coworkers to ask what I did for valentines day and I tell them “I saw the sonic the hedgehog movie” and I BRACE myself reflexively to be laughed at but not a single person did they were just like oh cool! how was it? like it really makes me appreciate I got to at least grow up and feel a little more accepted!

so THATS my thoughts feel free to comment and discuss!

#seth speaks

6 notes · View notes

edienotsedgwick · 6 years

Link

Hello everyone, it’s been a while since i’ve posted about music here. But i’m super duper happy to say that i’ve definitely gone places sinces I released the first version of You Left Me.

Since then I have put out the whole EP that I have been working really hard on for this whole year and I have so many people to thank for helping me make that happen! However I have described it long enough on other posts on other social media. (But i’ll totally post some links to those posts later.)

What I want to talk about here are what these songs are about. On Tumblr here in this big community I have built for myself, I feel like I can be at my most intimate so that’s what i’m going to do. I’m going to tell you all what these songs are about. After all, since most of you here have only heard the one demo I posted on here, I think it’s about time you all needed an update.

So, the EP starts off with You Left Me. You all know what that’s about from my previous post and the meaning still obviously hasn’t changed, however this is a new version of You Left Me. After I released the first demo, I went into production to make a more refined and complete version. Still with as much of the heart that I intended to put in there.

Genuine Tears is my second track and second single off this EP (It was released a couple weeks before the whole EP’s release with the new You Left Me.) It’s a song about an incident of bullying in my life where I felt like my emotions and story weren’t believed by most people due to rumour spreading. Unfortunately some of those people who spread the rumours were actually people I considered my “friends”. I felt like I was framed as a villain when really I was the victim. Since then I have been very self conscious about how people view my personality because of this. I’m scared of coming off as too annoying, too clingy and in this case it seemed like I was too snitchy! Too honest! This is a song as wanting to be seen, not as a bad guy, but just as a human who deserved support from most people unfortunately in a time when people were refusing to give it.

I Can See You In The Fog, is the shortest track on the EP but it sure does get to the point easily. It’s about feeling unsafe in environments where I should have all the right to be. For the longest time, i’ve had to be around someone who doesn’t make me comfortable at all and it’s made me feel like they’ve always been out to get me. It makes me so anxious that I have to look around a lot and be alert at all times when they’re around. Sometimes I avoid certain places in general because I associate them with where that person always is. The song is about wanting to just relax and not feel like that for once and instead enjoy myself no matter where I have to be.

Dream Person isn’t about anyone in particular, but it’s just about a general feeling that me and i’m sure many others might relate to. Ever since I broke up with my last partner, there has been this big hole in me that feels like it can only be filled by a relationship. Most people who know me know how badly I want the hole to be filled. Everyday, I have fantasies about being in love with someone and someone being in love with me. Doing all the things that lovers do that i’ve never really experienced, that lots of others I know do way more than me. (I’ve only ever properly dated two people in my whole life.) My biggest want in a relationship, is to one day just wake up lying in someone’s embrace as the sun shines into my room through the window. This manifests in the dreams I have at night. In my dreams i’m always with someone, it doesn’t matter who, all that matters is that in the dream i’m finally happy. When I wake up, I feel like i’m being tricked whenever I see that I was just cuddling a pillow the whole time.

And yeah, long story short that’s the EP. I hope you all enjoy this songs as much as I was satisfied making them for you. I want people to be able to feel something hearing them and I want to be the one who’s music is there for you if you ever end up in a situation much like the ones i’ve been in.

Thank you for following me,

Edie Xx

28 notes · View notes

unholyhelbiglinked · 6 years

Text

Camp Beaverbrook | 007

CHECK OUT THE STORY FROM THE START HERE

Hey Mom!

It’s been what? A week since I’ve last written. I’m not really sure if they’re sending these letters on Fridays or if they actually spend that much money on postage. Part of me thinks that they don’t send them at all and they’re just sitting in those big plastic cases that Gail always keeps under lock and key. It’s been fun, though, but I’m ready to be a counselor now. I think this is the perfect send off.

Emily

She mindlessly pushed the three lone carrots against the broth backdrop. They looked sad, all of their coating having tinted the liquid that they swam in. They looked like little life rafts that could carry a whole person if a person was an ant.

She had her lip between her teeth, her stare trained in the general direction of the counselors. On one counselor that had the sunlight hitting her just right as it rose against the mess hall. Emily had a full conversation with her yesterday, one where she only choked on her words once or twice. She knew Aubrey, had seen her every single day at camp for the past three and a half years but still- each time was met with her heart in her throat and an instant moisture to her palms.

The blonde did a bit of a double take, first catching a gray gaze before shooting back down to her own food and up again. She offered up a kind smile and a half-hearted wave. Emily fumbled with herself, cheeks inflamed as she lifted her chin in a nod and looked back toward the grooves of the table that had gotten so interesting. An onion clung to the back of her spoon.

“You are helpless.” Hayley tore a generous piece from a roll, dipping it into the broth. “Just jump her bones already.”

“What?” Emily hissed, voice low “I don’t want to- I mean, she’s flawless but that doesn’t mean I need to have sex with her. Honestly just being in her presence-“She trailed off, gulping in a heap of air “Where’s Jane?”

“Nice change of subject Michel Emerson.”

Emily let out a deep grumble at the reference. Hayley was playing to her weakness; a shitty movie about vampires that hung from the bottom of train tracks. Michel Emerson had risked everything for a pretty girl with an alluring personality, even if it did turn him into a creature of the night. “Seriously, asshole, she hasn’t shown for lunch, and now dinner?”

“So? Jane never shows. She probably passed out after her time slot on the lake. Yeah?” Hayley rolled her eyes.

She had spent more than enough time talking Emily down. She had kept the clumsy girl from nearly drowning in the lake when Aubrey told her to simply cool off. It was getting late, there was sleep eating away at the edge of her mind and it showed in her demeanor. Not particularly sunny, but often times confused with discontent.

“Sure.” Emily agreed, not having anything else to do. She had lost all appetite for any type of dinner. There was a sneaking pinprick at the back of her mind. Something that she had gotten before. Her mother used to say the uneasiness was a clear sign that she needed to listen to her gut. But that was only before she put her on a plane for a class trip to New York with enough money to buy mace as soon as they touched down.

Now it was rocking her whole entire sense of being.

Emily let her spoon fall into the soup that was mainly untouched. It created a loud noise and beef broth soaked against her cheek. Hayley flinched, lifting her eyebrows. “You’re going to offend the chef.”

Coffee eyes shot towards the kitchen, Jesse was bringing the knife down on what looked like more onions. It certainly smelled that way. He had bulky headphones over his ears and a towel against his shoulder, head bobbing along. Somehow, she knew he would be okay.

She rolled her eyes and swung her legs over the bench. “Wha- where are you going?”

“I am going to go check her cabin,” Emily said, throwing her napkin down against the bowl of soup before gathering it all together. She didn’t wait for Hayley to open her mouth in protest, instead, she walked towards the very window that supplied the neon light of the kitchen.

Jesse glanced up, lifting his chin slightly before she gave him a wary smile and dropped the bowl before anyone else had, careful not to spill the broth. He went back to bobbing his head, and Emily exited the mess hall trying impossibly hard not to look towards the counselors.

There was a frigid chill to the air that made her seek for any type of warmth, a jacket over her simple cotton t-shirt, something to ease the cold that presented itself the moment the sun started to lower against the pine needle trees.

She shoved her hands into her jean shorts and walked against the path that had been carved out ages ago. There were boot prints, and even bare feet tracked in the loose dirt. Her breath pressed into the air in a soft cloud, something she used to exhaust. That small prick buzzing like her table was ready at a family restaurant.

The cabin looked bigger than before, almost like each of the three steps that she took up to the screen door were miles long. Her legs ached and shook, but she still pulled it open and glanced around the space: Her bed had been made this morning and was still left untouched. Hayley’s was a mess under her own, and Jane was empty. The covers were pulled back and the setting sun highlighted it in a ghastly orange.

Emily let out the breath that she didn’t know she was holding onto. Her lungs burned, and her ears were ringing now. A pressure and anxiety that she couldn’t fiddle with tugged at her. The door creaking open as she turned to face it.

Hayley.

She leaned against the doorframe, eyebrows raised. “Not here?”

“No, afraid not.” Emily let out a deep breath. “Dinner over?”

The girl nodded and flopped down on her mattress, stretching her hands out over her head as she groaned as her back popped in just the right way. She didn’t think she took that long to walk to the cabin across the camp, but she had, dragging her feet and begging for a reason to make the ringing stop.

Emily could feel her throat tighten and she blamed the cold air, not the deepening feeling in her stomach as she shook her head and pushed past her screen door, standing staggered against the steps to her cabin. It was crowded this time, kids trying to get back to their bunks before the mountain night grew chillier.

She watched as kids that wore a mix of forest green and golden yellow walked among counselors that were far from finished with their nights. She would often see the fire rising from the rocky shore and smell the beer in the metal trash cans that next morning. The thought made her skin prickle.

Aubrey Posen stood by the edge of the path, her arms crossed over her chest as those deep green eyes peered into Beca’s. The girl was shorter than her superior, but the way she puffed out her chest and sneered made Emily think that she had more gall than the woman she was looking for. Chloe had an even hand on her shoulder as if to hold her back or pull her to their shared cabin. The archery instructor lifting perfectly sculpted eyebrows up in discontent.

Emily steeled her nerves and walked forward, cutting across the crowd as a few people mumbled while others stared directly at her. She kept her distance, but not too much, Beca Mitchell shooting her midnight stare her way as if to acknowledge her presence.

“Hey, Em” Chloe offered up warmly, trying to defuse the situation, Aubrey’s own stare had softened a great deal, though, she never let her shoulders drop. “What’s up?”

She wanted words for form, really, she did. But they seemed to stall in her throat. At the crackling sound that she let out, Aubrey straightened her shoulders and turned herself completely towards the camper, knitting her brow. “Em?”

“I don’t want to bother you, it’s just- Jane, my cabin mate, I haven’t seen her all day.”

She knew she was taking it slow, mumbling. Four sets of eyes were on her. The surrounding area had been voided of kids, all of them sneaking liquor in their own cabins. Smoking loose cigarettes that they had hidden in their t-shirts before spraying a thick layer of lavender spray.

“She usually misses breakfast, but never lunch, or dinner. I’m uh, I’m worried about her.”

“Jane Eide?” Stacie asked, shoving her hands into the pockets of her oversized sweatshirt. “I’ve been working with her. She didn’t show today, though, figured she had fallen asleep.”

“I pulled her from the water the other night,” Beca admitted, “Late. She and two others were out on the lake after dark.”

Aubrey pulled in an easy breath, one that was far too calm for a situation like this, there was an unknown type of fear that was behind her darkened eyes. One that she wouldn’t really admit to, but Emily could see it. She could feel it.

“Right, so no one has seen her since last night?” All silence and blinking eyes. “Emily, did you hear her come in last night?”

“No, I didn’t. Neither did Hayley.”

“Okay. Stacie, you go back to the mess hall with Jesse, search the mess hall and the quad.” Aubrey had a certain stiffness to her voice. “Chloe, Beca. I need you to go to the north building and check the phone log- maybe she phoned home. Emily, follow me.”

No one made a move for a few seconds, just staring at the woman in front of them until she clapped her hands together and snapped everyone out of a haze that felt like a hazy dream. Campers didn’t just vanish. Some would get homesick, sure, but they would call their parents and get picked up begrudgingly. The feeling Emily had seemed to stem within the circle of them and extend- Stacie the first to nod and step away, doing a slight jog towards her station.

Chloe took reign and used the hand still on Beca’s shoulder to drag her towards the building that housed a small desk and the white postal bucket that everyone placed their letters in. There was a phone and a yellow log to write in, hopefully, Jane had.

“Come on,” Aubrey said, and Emily followed like an obedient dog on a short leash. They were walking in one clear direction and Aubrey was moving fast the cold not seeming to get to her, so Emily rolled her shoulders back and forgot about her own chilled bones.

Aubrey pushed past the door to her little cabin, something that looked out over the east side of the lake and was isolated to everyone else. No one dared come this close to a place like this, the place that Aubrey would sit and drink coffee before anyone disturbed her.

Emily didn’t know what to expect, but it looked almost normal: There was a little television that was an obnoxious shade of blue and had rabbit ears stretching to the sky. A nicely made bed and a small table with two chairs on either side of it. There were lights strung up over a floral bedspread. It smelled thickly of lavender, and it pulled Emily in. She struggled to stay against the threshold.

“Here,” Aubrey seemed slightly out of breath, she stretched forward and handed Emily a hard metal flashlight. She had palmed one herself, its silver shell reflecting the fairy lights. “We’re going to check around the lake.”

“Okay,” was all Emily could mumble, the woman pulled open what looked like a closet instead of a dresser. She produced a brown leather bomber jacket that had a fur collar, folded and covered in patches. It looked worn and overwhelmed her with scent as it was tossed in her direction. “I can’t-“

“It’s cold,” Aubrey said tenderly. She was wearing a sweatshirt herself, adjusting the collar as she flicked off the light and pressed herself through the doorway. Emily could feel her heat against her front.

She hurriedly slid it over her shoulders before closing the door and jogging slightly to catch up with Aubrey, she had already flicked her flashlight on. It created a circle of yellow that she swept over the grounds that they walked against, their sneakers loud compared to the silence of the night. Emily couldn’t hear crickets.

Her shoulder would bump against Aubrey’s every couple of steps, and she savored the touch, moving her own beam of light close to the water’s edge. It lapped at the stones and made them look prettier than they really were.

“I lost my hamster once.” Emily finally said timidly.

There was a slight hint of a laugh, or maybe a scoff, that pushed past Aubrey’s lips. Either way, its splayed against the darkness of the sky in a puff of white. “What?”

“Yeah, when I was six, I had a hamster and he got out of his cage somehow. We couldn’t find him for a couple of days- maybe a week. I don’t remember. I was six. But we finally found him, you know.”

“Where was he?” Aubrey asked, pulling a branch up for the both of them to duck under. It smelled like pine and dropped dead needles at the movement. The lights from the camp were getting smaller as they wandered into the large isolated parts of the perimeter. The lights from the cabins looked like they were put through a funhouse mirror as they reflected off the inky water.

“He was in the television.”

“Your hamster?”

Emily hummed in response, letting her light move against the stretch of trees. They looked scarier at night. “Yeah, in that little part where the speakers usually are. He had chewed through all of them, so at least we knew he didn’t starve. The little guy lived four more years after that… so uh, maybe we’ll find her. You know?”

“Jane is a person, not a rodent.”

“Oh, I know,” Emily’s shoe slid on the closest rock, the sound splaying oddly as Aubrey instinctively reached and clutched onto her arm, keeping her from sliding too much “Thanks. I just don’t think I’ve lost anything else before.”

Aubrey stopped then, her back to the forest as she parted her lips. Emily didn’t know if it had anything to do with her eyes adjusting or the fact that the moon had risen to its fullest point, but it was easier to see. Every part of Aubrey looked milky blue, her lips and eyes darker than the rest of her subtle features. She looked like a siren, playing oddly with the rubber button on her light. Almost like she was nervous.

“I have,” Aubrey said, so softly it was almost muted by the water lapping the shore. “My father he uh, he left when I was fifteen, maybe sixteen? I don’t think we tried too hard to find him but it um, it feels kind of like this. You know?”

“Like someone is holding your heart and just kind of… squeezes it?”

Aubrey let out a long-held onto breath “Yeah, yeah. Like that. Is it getting tighter for you too?”

Emily chewed on her bottom lip. She had to admit, the feeling seemed to melt away around Aubrey. She was a calming presence, an authority figure that she gawked at if anything. Aubrey sniffed, eyes sad in the moonlight as they flicked towards Emily’s mouth. “Yeah, I think so.” It was no more than a whisper.

“Emily…?”

“Yeah, Aubrey?”

The older woman’s hands were cold as she took a fluid step forward, her fingers curling around the back of Emily’ neck as she let the other hand hold tight against the flashlight. Emily had kissed people before, hell, she had done it often and diligently, but this was different. This was soft and Aubrey tasted like a mix of cinnamon and heat. Her nose was cold against her cheek as her touch moved against Emily’s jaw delicately.

Emily pulled away with a sharp breath, leaning her forehead against Aubrey’s. That hand around her heart had released its hold and let it flourish as the blood rushed past her ears. “Whoa.”

“That was-“Aubrey swallowed, her hand dropped her hand down “I’m sorry, I misread the situation, I’m sorry.” She apologized twice in one sentence, wanting to move away completely, but she had found Emily’s hand curled around the collar of her sweatshirt, holding her in place.

“No,” She whispered, “You have no idea how long I’ve waited for you to do that but-“

“It’s not the right time.” Aubrey finished her thought, swallowing roughly. “We need to keep going.”

Emily nodded and eventually dislodged her fingers from the girl's coat, even if it was the last thing she wanted to do. They returned to walking in silence, their feet crunching against dried leaves and gravel. She could swear she felt the ghost of a cold hand.

#Beca Mitchell #Chloe Beale #Emily Junk #Aubrey Posen #bechloe #bechloe fic rec #junksen #junksen fanfic

4 notes · View notes