#natasha romanoff sad

[gingiesworld]

Kiss Me

Natasha Romanoff x GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst. Fluff.

Taglist : @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories @louxbloom @wandanats-goodgirl @the-ox-fan20 @ladyqueenxoxo @aemilia19 @wandaromamoff69 @mfd-101 @dorabledewdroop @marvelogic @dopeyouth @karsonromanoff @bimad @lizzieislife94x (if you want to be added to my taglist, please DM me or comment)

Y/N pov

We were having a small christmas party with just the Avengers. It was also the twins first christmas with us. So we all decided to just do a small one.

"I truly don't get this Holiday." Thor stated as he sipped his beer.

"It's to do with religion. Some shit that most people don't really care about." I said as I placed my empty bottle on the table.

"People do care about it Y/N." Wanda stated making me chuckle. "Just because you're a grinch doesn't mean it's pointless."

"Well it is pointless." I said as I stood up. "All people use it for is a chance to get pissed off their head and get gifts off of people. Personally this holiday brings out the spoilt brats."

"Come on Y/N. Just because you never had a family doesn't mean it's pointless." Tony said with a smirk. Everyone fell silent as I turned to face him.

"What was that?" I said as everyone's eyes were on the two of us.

"I said." He started.

"Oh no. I heard you the first time you spoilt brat." I spoke with venom laced in my voice.

"I am not spoilt." He spat at me as he stood up.

"Really Stark. You had a rich daddy who already had billions before he even met your mother." I sneered as he stepped towards me.

"Say that again." He snarled as he stood right in front of me.

"Shouldn't we stop them?" I heard Kate ask.

"Not yet. I want to see where this goes." Yelena said as I heard everyone starting to take bets.

"I don't repeat myself." I told him angrily.

He stepped back to put some force behind his punch. My head moved to the side with the force but it wasn't enough. Especially since I have a form of Super Soldier Serum running through my veins.

When I turned back to face him I tackled him to the floor. I threw a couple of punches to his face. He then pressed his arc reacter and blasted me off of him. I got to my feet as he got to his.

"Stand down!" Steve ordered but neither of us listened to him. Tony started to punch my face until rer wisps wrapped around his suit.

"Stop this now!" Wanda shouted as she removed Tony from me. I sat up on my knees and spat the blood from my mouth

"Yeah, I know I never had a family but when you guys found me, I thought I finally was apart of a family. Yeah you may be dysfunctional but your a family." I said as I got to my knees. "Just not my family."

"Where are you going?" Nat asked me.

"It seems I have outstayed my welcome here." I said as I left without looking back.

I left them. They didn't want me. They never did.

It had been a few weeks since I came to an old hideout of mine. It was only a small dingey apartment but it was enough.

I was stood looking out of the window, watching the city get over the New Year. I sighed when I heard a knock on my door.

I groan when I saw Wanda at the door.

"What?" I spoke bluntly as I opened the door.

"You need to come home Y/N." She said with pleading eyes.

"I am home. The only home I have ever known." I told her as I took a sip from me beer.

"You're drunk." She stated as I laughed.

"I can't get drunk." I told her. "Goodbye Wanda." I said before shutting the door. As I moved away towards the window once again, someone banged louder on my door.

When I opened it Natasha walked inside. I closed the door before anyone else could come inside.

"What do you want Natasha?" I asked her impatiently.

"I want you to come home." She pleaded with me.

"I am home." I told her.

"No you're not. You're just surviving each day. This is a place that you lay your head each night." She said as she stepped closer to me. "Home is being with the people who love you."

"Well when you find them, let me know." I smirked at her as I got another beer.

"I love you." She said as I laughed and shook my head.

"No you don't. You all just love the idea of having another super soldier on the team." I told her as I slammed the beer down. "That's all I am to all of you. Just another weapon. You're just like Hydra."

"I LOVE YOU. Y/N. I AM SO FUCKING IN LOVE WITH YOU. SO PLEASE JUST COME HOME WITH ME." She yelled. "Please come home."

"You're?" I asked her shocked that she would ever see me as I see her.

"Yes." She said as she remained in her place. I approached her until I was stood before her. My hand ghosted her cheek before I finally held her cheek in my hand.

"I have waited so long to hear that." I whispered as I looked between her eyes. "I have loved you since the first time you kicked my ass in training." I told her.

"Kiss me." She whispered. I wasted no time in closing the gap and kissing her with every emotion I felt towards her. This kiss spoke 1000 words. A thousand I Love Yous in one moment shared between two souls.

[shamelessfaceless]

Love, Pain, Death, Repeat

Navigation | Marvel masterlist | part II

Pairings: Wanda Maximoff x F!reader, Wanda Maximoff x Vision

Summary: Even death won't help you get rid off her and pain she caused.

Warnings: Mentions of death, cheating, angst

Wc: 600

A/n: Just a fast sad blurb, hope you like this <33

Your mouth is dry, completely opposite to your eyes. Pinning Natasha to the ground you let your tears fall. It wasn't supposed to be like that, but after hearing what you needed to do, you were sure it was the time.

"Think about Yelena! Your facking sister! Think what would she say if I told her that you killed yourself!" You yelled at her though she was so close to you she would hear your whispers.

"And you? You have a whole life ahead of you! You're so young! You are doing what you need, you're nice and brave, you put others before you, you are a hero people need!"

"I don’t have anyone! Anyone! I spent last years crying in my room! People don’t remember me! I don’t even remember who I am."

"Y/N" She tried to change positions. You didn't let her. You couldn't let her.

"I am not enough. I never was. Everyone knows Black Widow or Iron Man or Hawkeye! Even she showed me I was never enough!" You were almost sobbing, your tears falling on Natasha’s suit. "She choosed fucking microwave!"

When you saw Wanda for the first time, you fell almost in the same second. Literally fell. You wanted to come closer, but your legs had other plans, and you fell straight into her arms. This made her laugh. That was the first thing that actually made her show positive emotions after her brother died. Most of the night spended in your room only talking changed into spending nights in yours and hers own room. After your old relationships you were negative about love, but you started trusting her, it meant so much for you. She promised you stars. It didn't take long for her to take interest in Vision. You trusted her with your whole heart, and all she did was break it. He was just a robot, you thought you didn't need to care about him. Maybe he was a little bit too nice to Wanda, but she wouldn’t fall for cold metal, right? Oh how wrong you were. After one of the missions, you came back to your room just to see her covered in hickeys that for sure weren’t yours. You just sat on the floor and told her to get out.

"You will meet someone else. Just give yourself a chance. For fucking sake, if you let yourself forget her, you will find true love and maybe have kids or cats." Russian was strong, you started feeling like your arms were going to give up.

"She cheated on me, and soon after she disappeared. Women always choose men." You said disgustedly. Your every relationships ended because they chose to be with men. "Tell everyone I loved them." You stabbed her hand to distract her.

You started running to the end of the cliff. Black Widow’s screams didn’t stop you. Just as you jumped you looked behind to see Natasha, she was so close catching you, just a few seconds and you would be still alive. You smiled to her wondering if she could see it, and closed your eyes. Last thing in your mind was the memory of one specific lazy morning with Maximoff. Morning when she promised you cozy life, no avengers, just you and her in a big house and kids.

…

Opening your eyes you expected to see your dead parents, not two young boys.

"Good morning my love." Your head snapped to the door of the room. Wanda stood there, width smile on her lips, her eyes shining a little bit with red.

[wandanatsthings]

𝐍𝐨𝐭 𝐄𝐧𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡

Hey guys, this was a request that I got last week, I'm sorry it’s taken me so long to get it out for some reason I was struggling to write. I know this isn’t amazing but I hope you all enjoy it and feedback is always welcomed.

Disclaimer: This is set in the age of ultron but wanda and pietro are a little older. 

(P.s im dyslexic i'm trying my best) 

Warnings: Character death, cheating, cursing, grief, sneakiness, angst. I think this is it but please let me know if you see any more.  

Summary: Wanda cheats on reader because she feels they are responsible for her brother's death. 

Word count: 2.6k 

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“Bet you didn’t see that coming,” Pietro says with his signature smirk as he slowly falls to the ground. The bullets that were meant for you pierced through his skin. “No!” you screamed as you watched his body fall. You ran over to him in what felt like slow motion. “Pietro no come on stay with me.” You say with tears in your eyes while falling to the ground where he lay. “Come stay with me please Piet, please Wanda needs you.”

He looks up at you with his crystal blue eyes.

“My dear sister will be okay, for she has you her love.” He says slightly choking from the blood coming out of his mouth knowing that this was probably the end. “No I won't be enough, she needs her brother.” You say pleading with him to stay. “Yes you are and you better take care of her or I will haunt you.” He says jokingly.

You chuckle a little at that, finding it endearing that even in his last moments he was still cracking jokes like he normally would. “I- I will, I promise.” You say taking his right hand and squeezing it. You knew that he was tired. With all that he had been through with Hydra and losing his parents. You knew all he wanted was rest, but couldn’t until he knew his twin sister would be well taken care of. “I will do everything in my power.” He looks up at you nodding.

You nod back at him letting him know that it was okay for him to go to whatever afterlife he believed in. You watch his eyes close and wait for his last breath to leave his body. When you feel it, You hear this earth-shattering screaming. You knew it was Wanda.

With her powers and the strong bond she had with her twin, you knew that she would feel that they were no longer in this world together.

You're heartbroken at the sound, never ever wanting to hear the woman you loved scream in agony like that.

As you're collecting yourself trying to figure out what you should do about Pietro you hear Tony come on the comms. “Hey guys we’ve saved all we can here we have to leave.” You sigh knowing that he was too heavy for you to carry by yourself but not wanting to leave him there. You make the tough decision to leave. “I'm sorry, please forgive me.” You say walking away, your voice mixed with sadness and regret. Sadness because Wanda would never see her brother again and regret because it was all your fault.

You make your back to the heli-carrier all you can think about is Wanda. How were you gonna tell her that you were the reason her brother was dead? That just because you weren’t paying enough attention to your surroundings you didn’t see the bullets heading straight your way but her brother did and took them for himself? What kind of shit is that? You thought. You walk up the stairs into the cabin of the heil-carrier.

When you walk in you see Wanda sitting in the corner with an empty look in her eyes. You walk over and sit down next to her. As soon as you sit down she falls right into you sobbing. “What happened?” You hear her say as you wrap your arms around her. You sigh, deciding that it would be best to just tell her. “Um there were so many bots everywhere and we were both fighting some but I guessed one was getting ready to shoot me I had my back turned so I didn’t see…but he did and he ran in front of me.” You reply trying not to break down. Wanting to be strong for Wanda. “I'm so sorry, I tried to help him but there was nothing I could do.” You say grabbing her hands almost pleading with her not to be mad at you.

All she does is squeeze your hand back with a nod. You were about to say something else when Clint walked on board. “Hey, where's speedy?” Wanda breaks down crying again with the mention of the nickname the boy had been given. You look up at him through your glossy eyes as you hold Wanda tighter and shake your head. Feeling sorry for the man because you know he had taken a liking to the boy. He nodded his head, “I’ll let the others know.” He said as he walked away feeling heavier than he did when he approached you both.

A few weeks had passed since that mission. The atmosphere in the compound is still very heavy. Feeling the weight of not only a hero lost but the casualties as well. You tried to make Wanda feel any kind of “better” you could. Her routine was the same every day. She’d sleep til almost noon when she woke she would cry for a while and wouldn’t eat until you damn near forced her.

On occasion, she would talk about him with you or ask you to watch what were her and her twin's favorite sitcoms.

You would do it all if it meant that she would feel at least a little better. You didn’t want to be selfish but if you were telling the truth you just missed your old Wanda. You knew she would probably never be the exact same again but if you could you would give anything just to see her little nose squench up or to hear her little giggles again.

That’s exactly how you felt when you noticed her hanging around Natasha more. Wanda had always taken a liking to the widow so you didn’t find it weird when you found the 2 sitting at the kitchen table with smiles on their faces. You were very happy to see Wanda showing any other type of emotion besides sadness. It felt very good to see her smiling even if it wasn’t directed at you. As the weeks went on the two started to spend even more time together. Whether that was eating, movie nights, or training it just seemed like they were always together.

You were starting to feel a little jealous at the fact she was spending more and more time with the avenger and less time with you but she was starting to become brighter in a sense. Again you didn’t want to be selfish even though you were feeling a little jealous and missing your girlfriend, especially because she was finally starting to become more like herself again. You decide to bring it up though, not as accusing her of something you believed she wasn’t even capable of but just as she seemed like she was starting to feel more like herself.

When you walked up the stairs into your shared room. You saw her sitting on the bed smiling at her phone. “Hey, baby.” You said sitting down next to her and kissing her forehead. You realized when you sat down she quickly took her phone and put it under her thigh. “Hi, is there something you want?” She said, Her accent is still very strong, not having left her native country not that long ago. You were taken aback by the tone she spoke to you with, her not ever even raising her voice at you within the year you had been together.

“No not really, just wanted to talk, you know see how you’re doing with everything.” You said. She looked at you and nodded, “Well I’m doing fine, I’ve just been cleared to go on missions again, I’ll be going on one in a few days actually.”

You were surprised at that and a little worried not that you didn’t think she could take care of herself but thinking she would want to take a break after everything that had happened. “Are you sure? I mean are you ready?”

You questioned with nothing but concern for the woman you loved well being although she didn’t take it that way.

“Yes! God you’re always trying to smuggle me, I can take care of myself. I don’t need you besides Natasha’s coming with me.” Her harsh words hurt you but you didn’t let her know that thinking that it was her grief making her react this way.

“Okay, okay I was just asking, I know you can take care of yourself, I’m glad someone’s coming with you. You and Nat seem to be getting closer, that's good.” You say.

Wanda sighs, “Yeah she’s an amazing friend.” She says with a smile. Almost the same smile she used to give you.

“Well that’s good I’m glad you have another person in your circle.” You say walking away with a gnawing feeling in your chest.

A few days had gone by and it was time for the 2 to go on the mission together. To say you had a bad feeling about it would be an understatement. You didn’t know what it was, you just felt like something was going to go wrong within the couple of days they’d be out. Not necessarily with the mission but something.

As you walked up to the landing pad with Wanda to send her off. Natasha was already there waiting for her, as soon as Wanda saw her she quickly let go of your hand and almost ran to hug the Russian. This made you feel some kind of way but you didn’t bring it up right then, not wanting to upset the girl right before she left.

Before the 2 got on the plane you reached out to Wanda’s hand. You noticed that she seemed very eager to leave but you thought maybe she was just excited about the mission. “Be safe please, come home to me.” You say going in to kiss her but instead, she dodges it. “I will be okay bye.” She said as she got up into the jet with the help of Natasha.

Right before the door closed the spy winked at you.

When you made it back to the compound you decided that you would take a shower to try and get rid of the awful feeling you had. You got on the elevator and walked into your room. While you were getting your clothes and stuff for your shower. You heard someone’s phone go off. You knew it wasn’t yours because you always had your phone on vibrate. You looked around and saw the phone that rang was on the dresser. You realized that it was Wanda’s phone, she had always left her phone at the compound when she went on missions.

Now you knew that you shouldn’t look but you just couldn’t help but to check and see who or what it was. You picked that phone up and opened it, you saw that she had a few messages that were unread. When You clicked on them you saw most of them were from this person she had in her phone as “N” You clicked on her contact and your heart dropped to the bottom of your stomach at what you saw. There were multiple messages but not just any kind of message. They were flirty, there were pictures and voice messages of Wanda and whoever “N” was. You soon found out when you came across a photo of what looked like another bedroom in the compound. The picture was of just what you were guessing to be “N’s” chest. The woman had on a red push-up bra and when you looked closely you could see little red hairs. You looked even more closely at the photo, and that’s when you saw the little black widow emblem Natasha wears on her suit. That's when you knew your suspicions had been true.

It all made sense now. The two were spending more and more time together, and getting closer and closer. You couldn’t think of a reason why she would do something like this. You never even thought that she was capable of cheating. You were so upset you couldn’t even cry. You knew you needed to figure out what you wanted to do.

You decided that you would think more about it over the 2 days that she would be gone.

The two days had gone by and you finally knew what you were gonna do. You had it all planned out all you needed to do now was wait for her to arrive which by your calculations would be any minute now. You were in the common room when you heard laughter. It was time that your plan started.

You got up and walked over to them only acknowledging your girlfriend. “Hey love welcome home I have a surprise for you if you would just follow me.” You said reaching your hand to her. You see them both look at each other and only one of them speaks. “See you later?” Natasha says smirking at Wanda. “Yeah see you later,” she replies. Natasha walks off. “So what’s happening later?” You asked while leading her to where you have a nice dinner set up with her favorite Paprikash. “Oh nothing, we're just gonna do our mission reports together.” She replies. “Well isn’t that nice?” You say pulling her chair out for her to sit. “This all looks amazing.” She says already picking up her fork to dig in. “Thank you, I worked very hard.” You said smiling on the outside. On the inside, you were absolutely dying.

You were halfway through dinner even though you could barely stomach your food when it was time for the next part of your plan. “So I made up a little short film we could watch while we finish up eating.” She looks up from her plate and nods. “Okay play it.” You get up and grab your phone, having downloaded everything you need. You airplay your phone onto the TV and press play on the little video you made.

As she’s watching it you can see all the emotions on her face and not one of them is regret. When the video is over you unconnect your phone. “Well that was a good little film, wasn’t it?” You asked, the look on her face is priceless. “When’d you find out?” You chuckle a little at that. “That’s what you're worried about? Hmm interesting but to answer your question the day you left. You left your phone on the dresser-“ “So you looked through it!” She said yelling, cutting you off. “Yes as a matter of fact, I did, you have been acting off for weeks.” you say calmly back “Oh well maybe it had something to do with the fact my fucking brother died-“ “NO it has been more than that. In fact, you’ve been acting weird ever since you started hanging out with Natasha on the date.” “OH, what happy??!! I’ve been acting happy. That’s because she actually makes me happy because she’s not the one who killed my brother!” She cried.

You were stunned at that. You knew that she had to blame you at least a little bit because hell you blame yourself, but you didn’t think her resentment would lead to this. “So that’s what this is about.” You say almost crying yourself. “I’m sorry but I just can’t do this anymore, every time I look at you I just think about him and I just can't. I'm sorry I do love you, I do but just not enough anymore.” She walks away, with you feeling heartbroken and guilty but knowing what you knew to be true from the beginning, You wouldn’t be enough.

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Comment if you want to I love reading them!!!

This was the request ☟︎☟︎☟︎

[s1nful-sa1nt]

ITS MEME TIME @cherryxsapphic

im back babey

[creative-caramel-coffee]

The hard days

Pairings: Wandanat x R

Word count: 1.4K

Summary: reader has been struggling a bit and her girls step in.

TW: depression? Sadness

A/n I want people to know I’m still now writing much marvel but this was a special request so … yeah.

To say you felt bad would be an understatement. It had been a hard day. No. It had been a hard week filled with hard days and it just seemed to be never ending. Today you decided to tell whoever was pulling the strings to kindly fuck off. Whatever cruel game they were playing could play without you for just one day. Sure, it wouldn’t fix anything, but the bed was so comfy. The team could survive one day without you. They were big kids, and they could suck it up for once. Today was a pj and bed day. The only reason you were leaving this bed was for the bathroom and snacks.

Nat had been up since dawn as she was every day. You can take the girl out of training, but you can’t take the training out of the girl. Nat was in the gym, the boys were all away on a trip to some space conference or something Tony wasn’t in a sharing mood, so they were either in space or somewhere else, for once nat didn’t care.

After a solid three hours in the gym, she threw in the towel. Using the fluffy sports towels Tony kept in the gym nat took a shower and changed into comfier clothes. She has been up before the sun and already gone for a run before she came to the gym.

After what could only be described as the best shower of her life, nat walked to the lift and caught it to the communal floors for a hearty breakfast. Quietly she padded down the hall and into the kitchen. For once it was only Wanda at the table and they exchanged a puzzled look.

“I thought y/n was with you?” Wanda said covering her mouth which was full of jam and toast.

“I assumed she was here?” Nat responded coming to lean on the bench.

“Nope, haven’t seen her at all today.”

“Neither.” Nat frowned, you had seemed rather blue and tired when you went to bed last night but nat was willing to dismiss it as stress combined with fatigue.

“We should probably go check on her. Right?” Wanda asked putting down her half-eaten toast.

“Yeah… yeah, probably.” Nat said trying to stop herself from biting her lip. She usually did her best to suppress her anxious habits to make it easier to slide into character for missions. Wanda slides a comforting arm up and down nat arm.

“She’ll be alright. She probably just overslept.” Wanda said but they both knew you never overslept.

The two women took the lift to the floor with everyone’s rooms. Walking down to the hall at the end nat forwent knocking as her nerves got the better of her while her mind ran circles around her heart.

Opening the door, she frowned at the fact the curtains were still drawn. She looked to the bed to see a y/n sized lump cover head to toe by the blankets. Wanda stood in the doorway ready to provide backup of nat needed it.

“Y/n.” Nat said poking the lump.

“No.” Came a mumbled response.

“No?” Nat asked.

“No.” you said again.

“Y/n what’s wrong you never sleep in?” Nat asked shuffling up the bed to wrap her arms around you as best she could in this position. “Baby we just want to help.” She said softly.

“It’s … it’s all too hard.” You sobbed and Nat gently peeled back the blanket to see your tear-stained face.

“Oh honey.” She cooed and slide under the blankets to wrap you in her arms. She ran her hands through your hair while she tucked your face under her chin. “It’s ok my sweet girl. It’s ok. It will all be ok. I won’t let anything happen to you. We love you so much baby girl.” She cooed holding you tight into her chest. Over your head she shot Wanda a look and Wanda nodded and disappeared.

You must have cried for hours. To Nat’s credit she never left your side. She held you the whole time, uncaring of her tear-soaked clothes, you were more important.

“Baby? Do you want me to braid your hair?” Nat whispered and felt you nod into her collarbone. Gently she sat you up and grabbed the hairbrush from the bedside. After brushing out the knots which was a slow process due to her wanting to tease them all so you weren’t in pain, she started braiding. She began by sectioning your hair, running her nails over your scalp to seperate it into chunks. After it was properly parted she began twisting the strands, grabbing more hair as she went to create a beautiful design that ran across your head and fell into two of the cleanest braids you had ever seen. When nat was done she pressed a kiss to each of you cheeks and rubbed her thumb over your cheekbone.

“Oh my love, I don’t know what I’d do without you. I don’t know how I’d survive without your little notes it find around the tower. Or the endless ideas you have on missions. Your so special my dove, never forget that. The world would be lonely without you. Everyone is unique to loose you would be to loose something so unique it will never return. We need you. Not just as an agent, but as a person. You are loved my baby. You are so so loved.” Nat said and pressed a kiss to your nose. You let out a small sniffle and nuzzled into her neck.

Wanda came back to the door and sent nat a nod over your head.

“Hey y/n/n?” Nat asked softly.

“What?” You asked in a small shy voice.

“I think you might want to come to the cinema.” Nat said and helped you up. You shot her a confused look and nodded to tired to disagree.

“Ok.” You mumbled.

“Thank you baby.” Nat said and before you could react she scooped you into her arms. Your fronts pressed together as she held onto you like a toddler. You buried your face in the side of her neck and let the up and down motion of her steps lull you into a soft hazy daze.

After a minute you felt nat sit down on something soft. She held you close to her and whispered in your ear. “Open your eyes sweetie.” She said and you looked up. And you have never loved Wanda more.

Starting with the table, Wanda has dragged a table into the room which was covered in snack and drinks as well as just about every takeaway box from New York. She had made a pile of blankets which was made into a makeshift bed the size of almost the whole cinema floor. Pepper was sat cross legged tapping on a tablet and looked up to meet your gaze with a tender smile. Carol was tossing jellybeans into her mouth and sent you a wink when she caught your eyes. Mj was doodling in her sketchbook down the back and waved when she saw you. Yelena and Kate were throwing food at each other which was being eaten by Kate’s dog lucky.

You looked over to Wanda with tears in your eyes. “You did this for me?” You asked gazing around and noticing your favourite movie cued up to play.

“Of course y/n. The boys don’t get to have all the fun.” Wanda grinned and you sniffled.

“Thanks guys. It really means a lot.”

“Anytime boo.” Carol shot you finger guns and a grin.

“Not a problem at all y/n. I love free snacks.” MJ grinned.

“I needed a break.” Pepper sighed.

“Clint’s been driving me crazy, this is the perfect escape.” Kate said and elbowed Yelena from where she was trying to steal her pizza back off lucky.

“Oh… yeah… free pizza and a movie, plus a chance to annoy my favourite sister? Wouldn’t miss it for the world bubs.” Yelena grinned and lunged at the dog who darted out of the way and she landed on Kate who pushed her off.

“It wasn’t that hard. Plus you deserved it.” Wanda said and Nat just placed a tender kiss to your lips leaving the taste of her chapstick she stole from you a month back.

“Ready?” Wanda asked and you nodded as she pressed play.

It was safe to say you had never felt more loved and safe. Life was full of hard times, but without them the good wouldn’t feel so great. You were needed. You were loved.

[ellieromanov]

I loved you too.

Pairings: Natasha x R

Warnings: angst, breakup

Words:600

This is very different from what I normally write but it's very angsty so I thought I'd share. This is just a text conversation inspired by the "peeled orange" story on TikTok.

2020

Me:

Hi.

Natasha:

Hi.

Me:

How are you, Natasha?

Natasha:

I'm good. Surprised. I wasn't expecting to hear from you again.

Me:

Sorry.

Natasha:

Don't be.

How are you? Are you okay?

Me:

Trying to be.

Natasha:

I'm sorry.

Me:

Why?

Natasha:

You're trying to be, but you aren't. I'm sorry.

Me:

That's okay.

Natasha:

Was there a particular reason you reached out?

Me:

Yeah actually.

I just wanted to tell you that I got the job.

I'm moving to Berlin next month.

Natasha:

That's incredible Y/n! I'm proud of you

Me:

Thank you. I don't think I would have been able to do it without you.

Natasha:

I doubt that's true. You have talent.

Me:

thanks.

Natasha:

your welcome.

Me:

I still wouldn't have been able to do it without you.

Do you remember when I first got the call for the job?

Natasha:

Yeah I do. We were in the living room watching Elf.

Me:

And I nearly didn't answer the phone because I didn't recognize the number.

You were the one to tell me to answer it anyways.

Natasha:

That's true.

You cried so hard afterwards.

Me:

I did.

Natasha:

I don't think I ever ended up seeing the ending of that movie.

Me:

Sorry.

Natasha:

That's okay. I'll watch it again.

Me:

Natasha?

Natasha:

Yeah?

Me:

How's Yelena?

Natasha:

She's okay.  She misses you around here.

Me:

I miss her too.

Natasha:

I think we all miss you.

Me:

Yeah.. I miss everyone too.

Natasha:

Yeah.

Me:

I miss being cared for.

Natasha:

You are cared for.

Me:

By who?

Natasha:

By your family, by the team, by friends.

Me:

But no by you.

Natasha:

That's not true.

I care for you very much. I love you Y/n, im just not in love with you anymore.

Me:

Oh..

I still care for you too.

Natasha:

I know.

Me:

Do you think I'll be loved again?

Natasha:

Of course you will be Y/n. You're young you have so much time to be loved. I promise.

Me:

When you left everything changed so much.

Natasha:

How so?

Me:

A lot happened with the family.

Inge died.

Im sorry i didn't tell you sooner.

I've been struggling with that a lot.

Natasha:

Im so sorry Y/n

Me:

Me too.

Natasha:

I wish I had been there for you. Im so sorry I wasn't.

Me:

It's okay

I've also learned that I have very little control so the things i don't have control over I can't worry about it. I can only worry about the things a do have control of.

Natasha:

That's very true

Me:

For such a long time I thought it wasn't real.

Natasha:

What wasn't real?

Me:

Us. Love. I don't know.

Natasha:

It was real Y/n. And love still is. I know because you are full of it.

I also think kindness is real because you are kind. Good people exist, and one day one of those good people will love you for all of your worth, remember that Y/n.

Me:

You're still always understanding

Natasha:

I try to be.

Me:

Thank you for responding Natasha.

Natasha:

You're welcome.

But Y/n you can't text me again. It'll only hurt.

Me:

Okay...

I love you Natasha.

Natasha:

I loved you too

———

2021

Me:

I miss you

———

2021

Me:

I saw you on the news today, you look different, good. But different.

———

2022

Me:

I know you said to stop messaging you. I’m trying.

———

2022

*missed call*

*missed call*

Me:

I really loved you.

I Hope you find happiness.

I know you’ll do great things.

But It’s time for me to let you go Natasha.

I can’t keep doing this to myself

I have to let you go.

———

2023

Natasha:

I miss you so much.

I wish I still had you.

I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you when you needed me the most.

I love you.

I’m so sorry if you ever doubted that.

———

[dontsearchformyaccount]

I need more Nat fanfictions. Like what else am i supposed to do. Write them myself ?

[meidui]

stevenat + i bet on losing dogs

[maxiroff]

I guess your not who I thought you were ~Natasha Romanoff

Summary: Reader is bullied in school and Natasha asks her to tutor her. They fall in love but is their relationship really as good as reader thinks and what happens when Natasha is put in the spot?

Ps. It’s a shit summery but it will have to do.

Paring: Popular Natasha x bullied reader

Words : 1756

Warnings: ANGST , bullying- mentally and a bit physical, self hatred, eating disorder, talks of suicide, self harm, no happy ending

Note: This is my firs time writing angst so it’s not that good and it’s kinda rushed. And again English is not my first language so there may be errors and I haven’t proofread it.

It started with you tutoring her in math and in english. You were the nerdy outcast that nobody wanted to be seen around with. You’ve been bullied since you can remember and while you tried not to let the comments get to you, sometimes they just do.

“God you're so fat you should just stop eating.”

So you did. And it worked for a while, until it didn't. Every time you stepped on the scale the numbers seem to go up instead of down and your clothes still seem to sit too tight on your body. As the weeks progressed you got thinner and thinner but it was in vain, the comments didn't seem to stop.

“You could at least put on makeup, it's no wonder no one wants you.”

So you did. You bought everything your money would allow, foundation, concealer, mascara, contour, a brow pencil and blush. But it didn't matter, you knew that whatever you did it would still be in vain. You would still be the joke of the school. Everyday you hid behind the mask on your face and every time you looked in the mirror as tears streamed down your face you could see how you were slowly fading away.

God why could you never be enough. There was always something wrong with you and the more people said it the more you believed it.

“You’re such a waste of space, you should kill your self no ne wants you here anyway.”

They said as one of them bumped their shoulder into yours so hard you were pushed into a locker. Your arm ached as you could feel how tears welled up in your eyes. All eyes were on you, laughing as you ran as fast you could out of there. You could taste the saltiness of the tears upon your cheeks as you ran all the way home. It was all a blur but suddenly you were home, standing in the bathroom looking in the mirror. Your mascara smeared over your face as you tried to wipe away your tears. The longer you looked the more flaws you could see and the louder the voices in your head seemed.

“You should do it, you know they’re right.” “Your a disappointment to everyone” “Stop eating your so fat” “KIll youself” “No one wants you here anyway” “Kill yourself, do it”

“Aaahhhhhhhh, stop, stop, stop” You shouted as your knees gave out and you fell hard to the marble floor. Leaning your back against the tub you tucked your knees up to your body making you as small as possible. Resting your head on the top of your knees you finally let yourself let go.

“Please” you whispered as sobbs wrecked your body. You were so tired, so tired. When would it stop, why couldn't they just stop, you never did anything wrong. Maybe they were right, you would be doing everyone a favor anyway. You slowly lifted your head looking through your blurred vision for your razor blades. When you turned your head to the right you saw them laying in the corner of the tub. With shaky hands you slowly picked it up and brought it closer to your face, admiring it for a second.

If you found a big enough vein and made it deep enough maybe it would do the job, maybe. It was as if you were in a trance as you slowly rolled up your sleeves and brought the razor towards your arm. With a deep breath you dragged the blade in a perfectly straight line across your arm. Small pearls of blood slowly started to develop in the wound. One turned into many and the blood started to drip down on your clothes and onto the floor. That's when you seemed to wake up.

“Ahh fuck what did I do, what did I do, what did I do?” You quietly chanted over and over as you wobbly stood up and made your way to the sink. Panik set in the moment you realized the amount of blood you had lost and saw black dots in your vision for a moment. Fumbling with the first aid package in the cabinet above the sink you got out bandaids, bandages and rubbing alcohol.

Your eyes welled up again at the sting from the rubbing alcohol in the wounds blurring your vision once again. Carefully you wrapped your arm with the bandage and secured it with the band aids. Not your finest work but it worked for now. You made your way to your bedroom just wanting to sleep after the shock of what happened.

When you woke up the next day you had a text from an unknown number.

Hey I know this might be weird but I have been failing a few classes and I happen to know that you have really good grades in them and was wondering if you could help me?

-Natasha Romanoff, in your economic class.

That was almost three months ago now. Natasha was known for being the popular girl in school, always has been. You knew it could be a mistake to say yes given that she was also known as one of the school bullies. Which you knew all too well having been at the receiving ends of some of her comments. But what the hell tight, it's not like life could get worse.

And it didn't. In the beginning it was quite awkward but it wasn't that bad. As the weeks progressed you and Nastaha got closer and she asked you out. You almost couldn't believe it but you said yes and it was the best thing that had happened to you. Of course in the beginning of the relationship you were weary of her intentions because of the nature of it. But as time passed you trusted her more and started to open up about your struggles with mental health and your ED. And in return she told you about her insecurities about being out to the school because she was afraid of being treated differently.

You helped each other and you told her it was okay to keep your relationship secret when she asked. Of course it hurt to not be able to hold her hand in school and not being able to walk her to class or kiss in the hallways like everybody else. But if that was the price that came with being with her, it was worth it, she was worth it. Your small but memorable moments were what counted.

For example yesterday it was your guys six month anniversary and when you opened the door for her she stood there waiting for you with a big bouquet of flowers. She also got you your favorite chocolate and she gave you a build-a-bear with a massage saying she loved you build into it. You had set up a romantic dinner for you and put the flowers on the table. Now it was your turn to give her your gift and you were nervous as hell for her reaction.

“Ehh so you know i couldn't really afford anything fancy but i remembered how you said a few weeks ago that you liked more personal stuff. So I made you this necklace, it has both our initials and I have a matching one.” you said as you carefully handed it over to her. You couldn't even look at her because you were afraid of her reaction. The silence was defeating. Why didn't she say anything? Maybe she hated it. Maybe she thought it was ugly, I mean it was home made after all. God this was a bad idea.

“Em you don’t have to wear it-”

“No shut up I’m going to wear it forever, I love it” Your eyes looked up at her shimmering with tears. “Really” You said hopgull.

“Yes really” she put her hand under your chin and kissed your lips softly. “I love you so much my darling. You are the most valuable thing in my life and I’ll wear this as a sign of that.”

You still could not let that memory go as you wandered the halls a few days later.

You knew Natasha said she wanted to keep the relationship private because she wasn't out to the school. And while you knew that might have been true you knew now that she finally was out that the real reason was because she was ashamed. She was ashamed of you. She didn't want to be seen with you. You could hear your own heart crack when you realized that. It hurt but you knew you could get past that because she meant that much to you.

You normally wouldn't talk to her in school, per her request, but right now you didnt care as you got closer to her and her friend group. She had taken off her necklace when she showered at your house and forgot to take it with her so you were just going to give it back. In and out, a quick exchange, barely any words needed.

You could see how her friends sent you weird looks as they realized you were coming in their direction but Nat hadn't noticed you yet.

“Oh look who it is, the freak” they all laughed and Natasha turned towards you. Her eyes immediately widened and you could see the panicked expression spread on her face.

“What the hell do you want?” Came from one of her friends but you just ignored them.

“Emm N-nat you forgot this at home” you said as you slowly inched your hand closer to her showing the necklace. She watched you with a weary expression.

“And why would I want to have that” she said with a serious tone as her friends laughed at her comment and you slowly drew your hand back in shame.

“I would never wear something as ugly as that, it's even uglier than you” this time she laughed along with her friends. Your eyes filled with tears at the humiliation and hurt as you remembered her promise to you when you gave it to her.

“I guess you're not who I thought you were” was the last thing you said as you turned to run away with tears streaming down your face. Throwing the necklace towards a trash can only missing it by an inch making it fall to the floor. How stupid of you to believe she would ever want you as much as you wanted her.

Part 2 here if you want a happy ending instead

[gingiesworld]

Last Christmas

Natasha Romanoff x GN! Reader

Warnings: Fluff

Taglist : @natashamaximoff-69 @canvascoloredin @wizardofstories @louxbloom @wandanats-goodgirl @the-ox-fan20 @ladyqueenxoxo @aemilia19 @wandaromamoff69 @mfd-101 @dorabledewdroop @marvelogic @dopeyouth @karsonromanoff

18+ MINORS DNI

It was no secret that Natasha had feelings for Y/N, from the moment they joined the Avengers, her feelings only grew each day. But she started to lose hope when they started to date Sharon Carter, a fellow agent.

Even through their relationship, she remained Y/N’s best friend and confidant. Even through the heart break when they found out that she had cheated on them, with none other than the noble Captain America himself.

“You should tell them how you feel?” Wanda told her as the two got ready for Tony’s annual Christmas Gala.

“I can’t do that Wanda.” She told her. “They would never see me as I see them.”

“You will never know unless you try.” Wanda told her as she finished her make up.

“Let’s just have fun tonight.” Nat told her with a hopeful smile, meanwhile Y/N was already at the bar with Bruce as they watched Sharon carelessly dance with Steve.

“She’s not worth the pain.” Bruce told them as he took their attention.

“I know.” They nodded for the bartender to refill their drinks. “I just, I don’t really care for her anymore.”

“So, is there someone else?” He asked as they gave him a smile.

“There is.” They nodded. “I’m just afraid, I don’t want to just lay my heart out for it to be broken again.”

“You’ll never know unless you try.” He told them as they sipped their drink, their eyes soon catching sight of Nat and Wanda. “It’s either of the girls, and since Wanda is in some sort of companionship with Vision, it would be companionship right? I’m not used to being in social circles.”

“It is.” Y/N laughed.

“So I would say it’s Nat.” He confirmed as the two girls approached.

“What’s Nat?” Wanda asked with a raised brow and a smirk on her face.

“My best friend.” Y/N smiled before looking at the two. “You both look stunning as always.”

“Thank you.” Nat whispered as she accepted the drink Wanda ordered, both watching as Y/N disappeared through the crowd. “What’s wrong with them?” She asked Bruce who just shrugged.

“I am going to say hi to Helen.” He told the two women before walking away.

“What is going on?” Nat asked Wanda who shrugged.

“Go and talk to Y/N.” Wanda pressed on as Nat sighed, finishing her drink before taking the leap. Finding Y/N stood out on the balcony away from the people dancing.

“Y/N, are you ok?” She asked as she stood beside them.

“Yeah.” They told her as their eyes never left the skyline.

“If it’s them two, I can kick their asses if you want.” She told them, making them chuckle.

“It’s not that.” They told her as they looked at her. “I know I should feel pain and hatred towards them but I don’t. In fact I feel free from her.”

“That’s a good thing right?” She questioned as they nodded.

“It is a good thing, but I am scared.” They confided in her. “There is someone who I have had feelings for, for a while. Maybe before I got with Sharon but I am afraid of getting my heart broken again.”

“It’s not really living if we live in fear, is it?” She asked them. “So maybe you just need to take the jump.”

“Yeah.” They nodded as they looked back out again. “You’re right.” Nat was confused the moment their lips collided with hers, but she kissed them back nonetheless.

“I.” She tried to speak when they pulled away.

“It’s you Natasha.” They whispered. “It’s always going to be you.” Nat smiled as she leaned in to kiss them once more, smiles on both of their faces.

“You have no idea how long I have waited to hear those words.” She whispered as their foreheads pressed together. “I have loved you for the longest time, and I am so in love with you.” They pulled her into their arms as they held her close, watching the stars in the sky as the party went on behind them, feeling like it was just the two of them.

Last Christmas, Y/N found themselves heart broken and this Christmas, they found themselves with the one they should have been with all along.

[natsarrownecklacx]

Heart Of The Sea

Natasha Romanoff x Wife Reader

Summary- Not all missions go according to plan. Even for the famous black widow and her equally skilled wife.

Word Count- 2,658

Warnings- Pure angst. Character death. Allusion to drowning. Beating. Sad Natasha. Betrayal.

Based on this thought

⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗

It was meant to be a simple recon mission. Just in and out. Easy. Something a rookie could have done alone. You were both meant to be back in time for dinner. Safe. In your warm, welcoming house.

You were supposed to order in your favorite take out. Sit with your wife on the couch, cuddle up under one big blanket and watch a movie. You were supposed to kiss her goodnight and tell her you love her, just as you have done every night since you two had gotten married.

But things don’t always go as planned. Sometimes, for whatever reason, nothing goes as planned. And one wrong step, one miscalculation, can throw your plan out a window.

This is something Natasha desperately wishes she had accounted for when planning out this mission. She should have double checked the intel, triple checked. But Fury said he’d handled everything and she’d believed him. She’d trusted him, because how could he be wrong?

Running through the halls of the Hydra ship Natasha thinks back to what she could have done differently. How she could have prevented this. What she could have done to keep you safe.

She should never have left your side. You're a trained, skilled agent, she knows that, but still. She shouldn’t have left you alone.

The two of you were on a stealth mission. Simple, just in and out before anyone realized you were even there, something the two of you were well accustomed to and could have honestly done with your eyes closed.

You were sent to secure the information you’d come to get while Natasha was meant to set a bomb in the lowest deck of the ship. Not one that would take the entire vessel down, just cause an explosion big enough to make a hole in the side of the ship. One that, from Tony’s exact calculations, would give you both thirty minutes to escape.

But something went wrong. There were more soldiers on board than you’d initially thought. What your intel showed as an empty, unused crew quarters held thirty Hydra agents inside. All of them armed and less than excited to see an avenger walk unannounced into their shared space.

You’d fought, of course you had, and you’d even taken about half of them down. But they just kept coming. For every man you knocked down, two more seemed to take his place. You're a well trained spy, top of your class according to your wife, though she may be biased. But even the best equipped spy can get worn down. You’d been caught, captured and brought to the third level of the ship, to what looked like a break room. Hydra agents hooked your arms around a pipe, cuffing them together. They all took their turn throwing punches and kicks your way, each one causing more pain then the last. But you refused to give them the satisfaction of crying out in pain no matter how much it hurt. So you keep your eyes cold and your lips shut tight, praying to whatever god was out there that either help would come soon or they’d just kill you.

A loud bang booms through the ship, the walls and floors shaking with the strength of it. You smile to yourself, even though it hurts to do so. Natasha, you think to yourself, she must have set off the bomb, which means she wasn't caught like you were. She’s safe.

The guards all turn to one another, sharing a look before running from the room. Not a second thought to you or what would happen to you if the ship went down.

When Natasha got to the meeting point you two had agreed on and saw you weren’t there she immediately knew something was wrong. She tried your coms, once, twice, a third time. Nothing. She’d began to panic, you should be here by now. You should have been there before her, which means something must have gone wrong.

Natasha instinctively reaches for the trackers hidden in her gear belt, one that has a direct link to your own. Ones which were given to you both as wedding presents from Tony, they man saying something about always being able to find each other. At the time Natasha silently cursed the man, his meaningful gift causing tears to well in her eyes for the fifth time that day. Now though, she couldn’t be more grateful for the man and his gift.

Quickly, Natasha pulled out her tracker, using it to single your own to help her find you. She waits a few agonizing seconds as the tracer does its work. The only thing Natasha can hear is her heart beat and the beeping of the device in her hand as it goes to work looking for its counterpart. The second the machine stops beeping she takes off running in your direction, praying to whatever god was out there that she would get to you in time.

Continuing on her sprint to find you Natasha takes note of the rising level of water around her. It’s up to her ankles now, meaning it’s rising fast. It’s been fifteen minutes since she set off that bomb. The watch on her wrist counting down the minutes she has until complete submerge causes her heart rate to rise. She needs to get you out of here. She needs to get you both out of here. There’s people counting on you both. She can’t let them down. She can’t lose you.

Luckily, because of the rising water, there are no hydra agents on this level. Meaning Natasha can sprint toward you with no distraction. Save for the rising water, which is now half way up her calf, effectively slowing her down.

The creaking and groaning of the ship make for unsettling background noises as Natasha rounds the last corner leading to the room you occupy. She reaches for the door handle, twisting to open it but it doesn’t budge. “Y/n.” She yells out, throwing her full body weight against the door.

“I’m in here!” You yell back, panic clear in your voice as the water rises to knee level. “Natasha, I’m in here!”

Natasha continues to throw herself at the door. The added pressure of the water on the other side makes it difficult for her to burst through. But after her seventh try she manages to do it. She enters the room, her eyes searching for you frantically as she ignores the burning pain in her shoulder from ramming the door.

“Natasha.” You breathe out, drawing the redhead's eyes toward you. Relief is clear in your eyes as you take her in. She looks panicked, like she’s running on pure adrenaline. But damn you can’t help but think she looks so pretty.

Natasha’s heart breaks at the sight of you. There's blood running down the side of your head and from your nose. Your bottom lip is split open and you've clearly sustained an injury to the ribs. “I’m here. I’m here, hunny.” Natasha says, making her way toward you. As soon as she reaches you she brings her hands to gently cup your face, her eyes welling with tears at the sight of you. Natasha brings her lips to rest on yours for a brief, gentle kiss. “I’m here.” She mumbles, leaning her forehead against yours.

You allow yourself a minute to feel safe in your wife's presence, her body against your own acting as a form of pain relief, even if just for a second.

But then a rush of cold water wafts against your lower thighs, pulling you back to the present. You can’t help but laugh at yours and Natasha’s behavior. You know you're both only acting this way because you're relieved she found you, alive, but still. There is a bit of a time issue at play. “And I’m so glad you are darling but we really need to get a move on.”

Your words click Natasha back into the matter at hand. The quickly rising water, sinking ship and the cuffs which currently make it impossible for you to leave the room. “Right.”

Natasha frantically looks around the room for something to break open the cuffs with. A key, a hammer, an ax, anything that would set you free. But she doesn’t find anything. Not a single thing that could release you from the cuffs and the water has now risen nearly to the top of your thighs.

“Natasha.” You say, the shake in your voice making the spy stop what she’s doing to look at you. “I’m scared.” You say, the tears in her eyes making her realize just how real this all is.

There’s a very real possibility she won’t get you out of here.

“No. Okay. None of that. I’m getting you out of this. We’re both going home.” Without a second thought Natasha turns back to what she was doing before. This time scouring under the waterline for anything that could have fallen.

You take a second to look around you. The quickly rising water, now lapping around your waist, the rush of the ocean coming through the open door to the room. The sounds of the ship sinking fill your ears, hydra agents screaming orders at one another and the ship itself groaning in protest. Then your eyes land on your wife, your beautiful wife, doing everything she can to find a way for you both to get out of this alive. You allow yourself a second to move your eyes over her, to burn the image of her green eyes and red hair into your memory. You take a deep breath, willing yourself to be brave as you speak your next words. “Natasha stop.”

“No.” She bites back, refusing to stop her search. There had to be something she could do. Something she could use to help. She couldn’t just leave you here.

“Natasha stop.” You say, this time with more conviction, as much as you could muster with the fear raging inside of you as the freezing cold water bit at the skin of your hips through your combat suit.

“NO!”

“Natalia Alianovna Romanoff. Stop what you're doing and look at me. Right now.”

Hearing her full true name fall from your lips makes Natasha stop. You rarely ever call her by her full, true name, so she knows whatever you're about to say is important. Turning to look at you, Natasha holds tears in her eyes, shaking her head lightly as she walks toward you.

“You need to leave.” You say, pleading with your eyes for the assassin to listen to you. “Please Natasha, you need to go.”

Natasha takes another step toward you, closing the distance between you two. Tears gather in her eyes as she takes your face in her hands, holding you with so much care. “No. I’m not leaving you here okay. Not happening.”

The ship creaks and groans loudly. Water rushes in the door at a quicker rate.The cold water rushes around your bodies making you both shiver as you stare into the others eyes.

“Natasha, I’m not getting out of here. But you need to. I need you to go.”

Natasha shakes her head insistently, tears streaming down her face as she answers. “No. No! I need you. I need you, damn it, you're my wife, y/n. I can’t do this without you okay.” Natasha reasons with you, her words coming out fast.

“And I need you to live, Natasha. I need you to go live a big, beautiful life like the one I know you deserve.” Natasha shakes her head, insisting that the life she wants to live is with you and she doesn’t know how to live without you. That she can’t, she doesn’t want to. But then you say the one thing that could actually get Natasha out of the room. “Yelena can’t lose us both, Tasha.”

You're right. She hates it, hates that you always are, hates that she can’t think of a reason as to why her sister would be okay. That she would survive the loss of you both. But Natasha knows her sister, knows that that loss of her sister and best friend would destroy the blond.

So instead of fighting you Natasha brings your foreheads back together, her lips grazing over yours as she speaks. “I love you, y/n.” She mumbles through her tears. “I love you so, so much.”

“I love you too, Natalia.” You answer, tears of your own slipping down your cheeks.

Leaning forward you press your lips against Natasha’s. The kiss lasts for a full thirty seconds, with you ingraining the feeling of her lips against yours in your memory. Natasha wraps her arms around your waist, pulling you flush against her body, willing herself to never forget your warmth, your love, the feel of you in her arms.

You pull your lips away from your wife, breaking this kiss. Tears stream from your eyes as you stare into hers. “You need to go, love.”

“Baby-”

“Shhhh. This isn’t your fault okay. It’s not anyone's fault. Just go. I love you, but you need to go.”

Nodding her head in acceptance, Natasha takes one last look at you, bringing her lips to yours for one last kiss before turning and making her way out of the room not looking back because she knows that if she did she wouldn’t leave.

— — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — — —

It’s not until she gets back to the compound does she let the weight of what's happened settle on her shoulders. You're gone, her wife, her comfort, her home. Gone.

Natasha runs into the compound, searching its halls until she finds Fury in a meeting with her best friend, sister and the rest of the team. She bursts through the doors with little thought to her actions or what they can cause.

“You.” She seths, looking at Fury with eyes filled with rage. If looks could kill, the man would be dead on the floor. Every pair of eyes in the room turn to her, confusion and concern written clearly on all of them. But she ignores them, her sights set on the man at fault for your death.

“Natasha?” Yelena asks, standing from her chair worriedly. “What’s wrong? Where's y/n?” The look in her sister's eyes tells Yelena all she needs to know. Her sister in law is dead. Her best friend, gone. The pain in her chest comes strong and fast, the realization that she’s lost you hitting her hard. But she puts it aside for the moment in favor of taking care of her sister.

“You did this.” Natasha shouts, crossing the room in four long strides, standing in front of Fury, her first drawn back ready to land a punch to the man's chest. “You took her from me.” Natasha screams, pounding on the man's chest, sobs escaping her throat as she continues to shout at the man. “It's your fault I'm not holding her right now. Your fault!”

The team watches on in shock, each and every one of them absorbing the pain and loss radiating from Natasha in waves. “You have one job, how could you give us such outdated information? How could you? I love her and she's gone and it's your fault.”

It's not until two shield ages burst through the door that the team clicks back into themselves. Steve and Tony stand to keep the agents back. Clint and Yelena go to Natasha, taking the sobbing woman in their arms and leading her from the room.

The room empties, everyone leaving in silence except for Fury and Agent Hill. Once everyone is gone the brunette turns to the man at her side, a look of regret on her face. “Sir-”

“Not a word, Agent Hill.” Fury orders, his voice leaving no room for argument. “It had to be done.”

⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗<3 ⧗

A/n - I got no apologies that can make up for this. I do have at least another two parts panned if that helps at all

@tigerlillyruiz

[reversedanatomy]

Finding Peace: Chapter 1

Summary: The first chapter to a slow-burn Nat x Reader fic. Building the relationship between Wanda x Reader. First Marvel fic and post here so I'm still getting used to preferable layouts, writing styles, tags, etc!!

TW: 18+!!! sexual themes, bad relationship themes, alcoholism, swearing, aggressiveness, uncomfortable topics.

Gif not mine

You remember the first night that you and Wanda had gone on a date. You two met inorganically through a dating app. It wasn’t something you were too keen on using, but the dating scene was impossible in the area, and you thought you might give it a try. After meeting Wanda for the first night at a sports bar downtown, the sparks between you two were evident. Her confidence spread goosebumps throughout your body as she weaved her way through a crowd of people lined up at the bar to meet you at your table. She was more radiant than any of her pictures on her profile.

“Y/N?” She leaned over you, placing a locked arm on the surface of the table to emphasize her cleavage.

“Y-yeah,” you stuttered, in awe of the outfit she chose to shape her body. She then smiled and slid into your lap. Caressing your face with her hands, she pressed her lips into yours as if she’d known you for years. You let yourself feel every spark, every firework she set off inside of your chest. The callouses of her hands cupped your jawline. They slid up your face to push your hair behind your ear. Her kiss was warm as it traveled from your lips to the corner of your mouth and down your neck. Her hands followed.

“You waste no time,” you smirked and pushed her deeper towards you. It was all so warm, so familiar. “This doesn’t seem like the place we should be doing this, though. How about we skip the small talk and head back to my place?” You lifted her chin with the tips of your fingers and presented your offer. She gave you a toothy smile that reached ear to ear.

“That’s rather bold of you,” she replied with a twinge of sarcasm. You snorted and let your thumb glide across her cheek. "How about a few drinks first? I get a bit nervous on first dates unless I've had a few." You admired her forwardness albeit it wasn’t something you were familiar with.

“Could’ve fooled me,” a chuckle slipped from your chest. “I thought you were already a few deep and I needed to catch up.” Wanda smiled in response. She moved from your lap onto the seat next to you and pulled a five from her coat pocket. She slid it towards you.

“Catch me up, then,” she whispered into your ear and patted the five before crossing her legs and folding her arms in an act of seductive defiance. A grin curled at the corners of your mouth, and you rolled your eyes in response and clicked your tongue. You took the five and made your way to the bar.

After a few drinks and some small talk, you two left the bar hand-in-hand to wander the downtown streets. Winter was arriving soon, and the biting cold left you breathless. Wanda noticed quickly and drew you into her long, black overcoat with a light tan trim. Already, you felt warmer. Already, you felt safe.

The two of you wandered for hours, but it only felt like minutes. Once your feet started hurting, you two both settled onto the stair steps outside of some unlabeled Baroque-style building. Your hands interlocked perfectly together as you both shared her coat. Wanda made you laugh. It was a genuine, hearty laugh that you hadn’t laughed in years. She was laughing, too. She said that she loved your humor, and that made you grin even more. Your grin was followed, however, with a yawn.

“Starting to get tired?” Wanda yawned in response. You nodded, another full laugh slipping from your chest.

“I mean…kind of? But… I just don’t want this night to end,” you sighed. Wanda kissed your forehead.

“Who says it has to end?” You looked up at her, meeting her blue-green eyes with admiration. “I figured that was the intention from the beginning, so I may or may not have taken us to my apartment.” Wanda turned around and pointed to the third story of the building, where the faint glow of a lamp illuminated through the window.

“That’s rather bold of you, Wanda,” you made reference to her previous claim at the bar. Wanda struck you a side-eye, her auburn hair falling from behind her ear to frame her face. You shrugged. “Well, what are we waiting for? I’m cold as hell and it looks like there’s an apartment up there calling my name.” You stood up and took her hand into your pocket before turning towards the apartment. She stumbled a bit on the steps while standing up, but was eager and quick to let both of you into the building.

The rest of the night was one to remember. The way Wanda felt underneath you felt just as natural as when she kissed you in the bar earlier that night. When you two were ready to sleep, you held her close to your body. You never wanted to let go of this feeling. Everything inside of you buzzed, and a warmth rushed through your veins. You looked at Wanda sleeping in your arms. You never wanted this night to end.

---------------------

Nearly three and a half years later, all you wanted was for this night to end. You locked yourself in the bathroom as you heard Wanda in the living room smash her liquor bottle on the wall. You held your hands against your ears as you listened to her shouting about how much this relationship was breaking her, how you were breaking her.

Tears fell down your cheeks. This isn’t what you wanted when you two moved in together into a small apartment in Chicago after dating for a year. For as long as you could’ve remembered, the honeymoon stage never left. The butterflies still fluttered through the garden of your body when you held her in your arms. It was all perfect. All perfect, until the first argument.

Wanda drank. A lot. It wasn’t a problem at first when the two of you were frequenting bars on date nights with or without friends. As time progressed, however, and the two of you moved in with each other, you realized she was just as much of a drinker at home as she was at bars. You mentioned your insecurities about it with her when you noticed that it was affecting your relationship, but she turned up her nose to you and poured herself another glass.

She blamed her alcoholism on a shitty childhood and high-stress job. She never told you what she did for a living, but you noticed she was often gone on extended trips to places she said she couldn’t talk about with you. “Think of it like I signed an NDA,” she would say as an excuse. You sighed and accepted there were things you were better off not knowing. If you pried, however, another argument would start. The drinking would start.

This was one of those nights. Wanda said she was leaving in a week for an entire month on an international trip for work. “We had plans for our three-and-a-half-year anniversary and my birthday, remember?” You said.

“I know, but you know how work is,” Wanda pouted and gave you the ‘eyes’ that she always gave you to get her way when it came to leaving for work.

“No, I don’t know how work is,” you snapped in response. “I never know how work is. You never tell me. For all I know, you could be off fucking somebody or somebodies in Spain or China or fuck knows where else.” You felt the heat rise in your face as a pit formed in your throat. You were choking out your words now because you were scared. But… it was okay to feel insecure about this, right? Wanda told you that you shouldn’t, but all of your friends agree with you that if she’s leaving all the time that you at least have the right to know where she is.

“What are you, my mom? Stop being controlling.” Wanda wouldn’t make eye contact with you. She was sitting at the kitchen bar, staring at the ice in her glass as she swirled her drink. You became irate. You ran your fingers through your hair, gripping into your roots.

“I’m controlling? You’re the one who’s disappearing for weeks or months on end without giving me the time of day. Sure, I was fine with your work trips when they were planned in advance and only for a few days at a time. Now, it’s like you’re leaving every other week, and I don’t know when I’m going to see you again.” The tears began welling up in your eyes. They burned. You began pacing back and forth between the living room and the kitchen.

“Jesus Christ, Y/N, I’m sorry,” Wanda put her drink down and began getting up from her stool. “I wish I could tell you. I really do.” She was drunkenly stumbling towards you, arms outstretched. You noticed her coming towards you, and you started for the bathroom. “Y/N, please don’t do this right now.”

Now you were here, in the bathroom. You turned the lock and slid down with your back against the wall. Wanda pressed her head against the door and started pawing at it.

“Y/N, please don’t do this. Just let m’in ‘nd we c’n talk about it,” Wanda stumbled over her words as she continued to paw at the door. When you didn’t reply, she started knocking. Louder. Louder. Louder, she knocked until you finally responded.

“Wanda, please, just leave me alone. You’re drunk, and I just don’t want to deal with this right now.” You were crying faster than you could wipe your tears, but Wanda wouldn’t leave.

“Then just tell me to leave if you don’t want me around,” Wanda smacked the door before you could hear her walking back to the kitchen. Then came a crash as you heard what sounded like a liquor bottle, or maybe her drink, being thrown to the floor. Jesus, what’s happening to us, Wanda? You thought to yourself as you reached for the tissues to dry your tears and blow your nose. There was more stomping, and the sound of walls being punched before you could hear Wanda trudging back towards the bathroom door.

“This is all your fucking fault, Y/N.” Wanda smacked her hand against the door again. You flinched from behind the door, but you refused to respond. It would only make her angrier if you said anything. “If only you just didn’t question what I did for work like what we agreed on when we first started dating, we wouldn’t be dealing with this problem.” It’s different when we’ve been together for three-and-a-half years as opposed to a few months, you wanted to say, but you held your tongue. Wanda continued.

“I’m not fucking anybody else, if that’s what you want to hear. I’m loyal to you. I’ve only ever been loyal to you,” Wanda started crying and hitting her head against the door. “I love you, Y/N. I only ever show you that I love you. You’re my everything.” The banging stopped. “But if you want me to leave, just tell me.” There was only quiet except for the quiet tears you could barely hear from Wanda. Your breath left your body in a long, exasperated sigh. You lifted your head from between your knees and twisted your upper half towards the door.

“I don’t want you to leave, Wanda. I just want things to go back to the way they were before.” You spoke monotonously, making sure your voice was emotionless enough as to not set Wanda off again.

“It’s never going to go back to the way things were,” you heard Wanda slide her back down the door from the other side. This made you start crying again, even harder. You were scared. If she left, you’d lose three-and-a-half years with the person you thought you were going to marry.

“What happened to us?” You forced a laugh through your tears. You paused after saying that to wait for a response from Wanda. Nothing. Your smile faded back into sorrow as you buried your chin between your knees and looked down at the floor. Maybe Wanda was doing the same. Maybe she was also contemplating the relationship—whether it’d end or whether they’d keep recycling the same arguments and this same drunken routine. You knew nothing was going to change, but you still wanted to try. Maybe it was because you were more scared to be alone than to keep hearing her slam on the bathroom door and smash bottles. When it was good, it was great. But there were so many moments now that left you feeling weak, tired, scared, and unfulfilled that you pondered whether the good moments just made you feel safe, or if they were actually great.

Wanda never responded to your question. You sat up on your knees, took one last breath, and turned to open the door. Your hand settled on the doorknob. Once you opened that door, you knew all the memories you two spent together would shatter like the glass from earlier. You felt that pit rising back into your throat as you unlocked the knob and started opening the door. The idea of facing Wanda right now terrified you—not because she was violent and angry, but because you hated those difficult, uncomfortable conversations about what happens next between you two.

You turned the doorknob and took a step back. You felt the door swing towards you with the weight of Wanda as she collapsed onto the floor. She was passed out. If this was two years ago, you would be rushing to her side and checking her pulse. Now, this was frequent. Weekly. Daily, even. You kneeled beside her to confirm her breathing before grabbing her by the forearms to drag her into the bedroom. As you dragged her, you glanced at the kitchen floor. She only smashed her empty glass, not the entire bottle. At least this time it would be an easy cleanup for tomorrow morning.

Once in the bedroom, you spent no time pulling her arm across your shoulder to help her into bed. You pulled back the bed sheets, set her on her side in the bed, and pulled the sheets up to her chin. You contemplated giving her a kiss on the forehead, but you recognized that this could be the last time you two ever had some kind of physical touch. You leaned in and gave her a quick peck. It tasted bittersweet.

You crawled into bed next to her and studied her face. Wanda was sleeping so peacefully. Her lips were slightly parted, and her auburn hair fell over her face. She always slept with her hand under her face when she laid on her side. You thought one more time about the first night at the bar and the confidence she had upon meeting you. You reminisced on the times you two made love, contemplated marriage, talked about what having kids running around the house would be like, and how you two would grow old together. You wanted so badly for everything to circle back to the sparks you two felt that first night, as that was what kept you going through this mistreatment all these years with her. These memories flooded through your mind, until you finally drifted off into a deep sleep.

-------------------------------------

The next morning, you woke up to the bed empty beside you. “Wanda?” You called out for her. No response. She must either be watching TV, or she left to head to the store for breakfast. The pain from the night before held strong in your chest as you composed yourself before heading into the living room. You scanned for any sight of Wanda. The TV was off and there was no sign of her. The site on the kitchen floor where she smashed her glass was swept and mopped. Then, your eyes lifted, where you noticed a note left on the bar.

You instantly rushed to the note, feeling yourself grow heavy as you got closer and closer to it. You picked it up and felt your hands shaking as you read it:

Y/N, I’m so sorry for last night, and I’m so sorry for everything I’m about to write to you. We both knew this day would come where we would part. You and I both have been going through a lot, and I think it’s time that we spent time apart so that we can work on ourselves. Also, work sent for me this morning. I thought we would have more time together before I left to get some kind of closure, but they needed me urgently. I’ll be gone for a while, they said. Months, maybe even years. Please don’t go looking for me. I’ll be okay. I love you.

                                                                                                            -Wanda.

You fell to the floor and broke into tears. You let out an ugly, guttural cry as you held the note to your chest. It was over without any conversation. There was no closure. There was no last goodbye as Wanda would step out the door and leave. There was no watching her from the window as she’d walk through the city streets before melting into the crowd, disappearing from your life together. This note was quick and nonconfrontational. It was unlike her.

You put the note in your kitchen drawer and slumped onto the couch. Whatever came next, you could handle it. You always could. You switched the TV on and felt yourself cry. You let yourself cry. A new chapter would open for you, you just had to accept it.

[hainethehero]

Steve Rogers as the unknown artist headcanon...

I always have this headcanon that no one knew about Steve's love for art or his talent for painting and drawing. So when they keep finding amazing portraits and paintings of themselves in their purest forms - not their superhero counterparts- but them doing the most mundane things in regular clothing, they get sort of wary that it's some art-themed villain who took the joke too far.

But then one day a stupid villain crashes the Tower through Steve's room and they all burst in ready for a fight, only to see that Steve's already got the guy wrapped in rope and secured to the floor while he grumbles softly, covered in paint, trying to gather what's left of his art supplies.

And Tony almost goes to make a sarcastic quip but Bucky and Natasha stop him when they see Steve's sad little pout as he picks up his broken easel.

[i-lovescarlettjohansson]

I think we all have at least one or two fanfics without a happy ending that we read a long time ago, but they never left our heads and we always end up imagining a happy ending for them, because they affected us in a different and inexplicable way and now we think about them at least once a week

[jalinaalkenza]

No. Cause-

YES...

[loveisanimaginarydagger3000]

I Wanted You

Natasha Romanoff X Reader

Summary: Inspired by the quote "We tried so hard not to be torn apart. But at the end of it all, we both wanted something different...I wanted you. And you...you didn't want them to know"

Rating: General | Word count: 1.1k | Warnings/Tags: Angst, no happy ending, bittersweet -

Standing at the back of the hall, nothing but longing and pain filled Natasha as she watched you from afar. The smile on your lips practically reached your ears as you smiled down at the woman you were standing at the altar with, a few cheers from the rest of the team filling the room when you met her lips as commanded by the priest, both of you smiling against one another.

Natasha couldn't help but want to leave, watching you being so, so in love with someone else caused her heart to fracture with every smile you sent to your new wife, every little touch and kiss.

It hurt.

It hurt so much to see you like this, but Natasha couldn't stop thinking about one thing.

What went wrong?

Your relationship had initially started as something more physical than emotional, your bodies  practically tangled under the sheets for hours on end as you both used each other as a means of getting out pent up frustrations and feelings. However, it was inevitable for you to fall for the redhead, her charming smile and sarcastic personality winning you over effortlessly as you grew closer and closer to her, finally getting the courage to confess your feelings to her.

The start of the relationship was rocky, Natasha having difficulty with being open with someone, with letting someone wriggle their way into her stone cold heart but you managed it. Of course you did, how could Natasha not fall for you?

Slowly but surely she gave you her heart as you did her, the two of you so deeply in love with one another that Natasha thought nothing could get in the way of you, nothing. But that thought came crashing down when it all ended, her heart breaking into a million pieces and never having been put back together.

Today was just a reminder of how broken she felt without you.

She kept her distance for most of the night, letting the rest of the team congratulate you on your special night, your arm wrapped around your wife's waist as you smiled at whoever was speaking to you, occasionally murmuring something into her ear to make her smile and chuckle.

However, once she saw you standing on the balcony alone, your wife far to enthralled in a conversation with Steve, Natasha couldn't help herself as her feet led her closer to you, her arms leaning against the railing to match your position.

"I didn't think you would come," is all you say as you continue to stare ahead, keeping your expression calm and mature as you the woman besides you knew how to read you and understand what you were truly feeling.

"You invited me," she whispers back, her voice containing that slight rasp you used to love to listen to.

"Still, I wasn't sure," you murmur, risking a look to your side to offer her a soft and grateful smile, wanting her to know how much you appreciated her being here despite the circumstances.

Her eyes scanned over your features, remembering every little detail she memorised after having gazed at you so many times, your eyes seemingly doing the same as you took in her familiar red hair and enticing emerald eyes. Your eyes naturally drifted to her lips, encouraging the redhead to talk as her gaze remained locked on your eyes.

"Where did we go wrong?" she asks and you know she's not doing this to cause an argument or a scene, she's simply curious. You offer her another small, soft smile before turning your head, looking back at the view from balcony of New York, the towers oddly peaceful to stare at during the night.

"We both wanted different things, Nat," you whisper after thinking for a moment, the nickname odd for the other woman to hear as no one called her Nat apart from you.

"I only ever wanted you," she says, voice laced with honesty but you shake your head gently, the smile on your lip fading a little but still present.

"You wanted more than just me," you say softly, turning back to look at her, getting lost in the eyes you still loved. "We tried so hard to not be torn apart but it just... It wasn't working, not for me," your confession has Natasha's heart beating wildly in her chest, the redhead unsure if she could handle it being broken once again. "We both wanted different things Nat, I wanted you and you..." your gaze moves to the window, staring at the rest of the team who laughed amongst themselves, "You didn't want them to know."

"Y/n... You why know I-" she tries but you gently cut her off.

"I know, I'd never force you to tell them," you whisper in that soft tone that Natasha remembers falling asleep to, the delicate nature of it calming. "I just, I didn't want to be a secret anymore," your voice wavers a little and Natasha sees past the façade you were putting on, able to see how hurt this conversation made you feel.

The two of you simmer in the silence a little longer, Natasha unable to excuse her past behaviour as you knew why she didn't want others to know. She was always told love was a weakness and telling others just seemed to be handing them ammo to later on fire back at her. She couldn't put anything before her job, not back then when there were more lives to save, more villains to fight, not even you.

"You don't love her the same way you loved me," Natasha whispers after thinking for a while, her tone not bitter just simply stating the facts, your gaze being drawn away from the skyline. "Perhaps not," you reply back honestly, "I don't think I could love anyone the way I loved you but that doesn't mean I don't love her." Your words painfully remind Natasha of your wife in the other room, how your finger wears a ring that belongs to the other woman, not the redhead. "I vowed to her that I'd spent the rest of my life with her and I intend to," you say, pushing your arms off the railing to move into a standing position, turning to look at Natasha one more time. "Maybe a  part of me wishes I was spending it with you, but that's not how things worked out. I love you Natasha, I always will but I just don't think we were meant to be," your confession causes a single tear to spill from her eyes, your finger delicately raising to wipe it away, your smile soft and bittersweet. "Maybe in another lifetime we'll get our happy ending," you murmur before pressing your lips to her forehead softly, a kiss to say goodbye as you offer her one last smile before turning away slowly, leaving Natasha to try and piece back her broken heart, alone.

—-

I love writing angst like this 😭 It's the bittersweet stuff that hurts so good

I hope you enjoyed ;)

Please leave any thoughts/comments/votes <3 They are greatly appreciated:)

Tik Tok- Wvndaeditz

Ao3- LoveIsAnImaginaryDagger