#no tags. just vibes

[meownotgood]

under the influence / hayakawa aki

When Aki gets dragged to the most popular strip club in Tokyo in hopes it'll help him "de-stress", against all odds, you help him do just that. In return, he finally cures your itch for something more.

CHAPTER THREE — EPILOGUE

pairing: hayakawa aki x fem!reader

word count: 5.4k

tags (for this chapter): 18+, love confessions, just the soft end to you and aki's story <3 

masterlist.

read on ao3

this work contains explicit content intended for 18+ individuals. please read the tags and do not interact if you are a minor.

Rain taps against the roof and the windows of Aki's car, decorating the glass in running beads of water, filling your ears with a low, rhythmic drone. The night sky is dark, the blurred lights of the city shimmer in puddles and the droplets on the windshield before the wipers push them away. Silence, and then the hum of the wipers. The lull of the car engine, and the continuous plop of raindrops. Silence, hum. 

It's starting to kill you, really. You have your head propped up on your hand, your elbow resting on the edge of the window. You drum your fingers against your cheek, rolling your shoulders back awkwardly. You're staring at the streetlamps as they pass, because the thought of looking at Aki has you far too flustered right now. 

He hasn't spoken much since he picked you up, just a few words as you were heading out the door, and then a couple more as he was starting the car. You complimented his outfit — a nice blue dress shirt with the first few buttons undone. He'd changed out of his work uniform and into something nicer, which you found pretty cute. He offered you his jacket from the backseat, to keep you warm while the car was heating up. You took it graciously, wrapping his jacket around your shoulders and burying your nose in the smooth fabric, feeling yourself enveloped in his crisp, familiar scent. And then, silence. 

You want to say something to break the tension. From the few secret glances you've taken at him, Aki doesn't seem awkward; he might just be thinking. Or perhaps he wants to speak, the problem is he can't come up with anything to say. You're in that same boat, unfortunately. 

You could tell him how you're feeling, that'd be a start. You're feeling so many things. You're nervous. Eager. Impatient. Once you're at your apartment, you can settle your nerves with some of your favorite wine, but you're out of luck until then. 

He's probably nervous, too. It might be part of the reason why he's been so quiet. You've missed him, but he already knows that much. You want to ask him something just to hear his voice again. You want to know more of what work's been like, because it makes you feel special knowing those things he isn't supposed to be telling you. You want him to talk to you about the stupid pleasantries neither of you had any time for before. Do you like this kind of weather? What do you want to eat tonight? Well, you've got all the time in the world now, you just aren't sure what you should do with it. 

Aki's car smells fancy and clean. If you didn't know any better, you'd assume it was brand new. Everything inside is totally spotless. When you close your eyes, focusing on the sound of the rain, you swear the downpour seems to be growing lighter. It echoes in the muffled sound of the car sloshing through water, in the faint drizzle hitting the roof. 

Your heart feels heavy, in a warm, but safe way, held in the hands of the rain and in Aki's comforting presence. Even with the silence, you still feel at home. 

You can't help but wonder what he's thinking about, your mind keeps coming back to it. Turning, cracking your eyes open the slightest amount, you steal the smallest glance of him out of the corner of your eye. Aki has his gaze focused on the road. His fingers tap against the steering wheel, much in the same anxious way you were tapping yours. He has an expression you can't read, but that's normal of him. 

Try as you might, you've got no idea what's going through that complicated head of his. 

So, you give up. You bring your gaze back towards the window. You make do with the silence, leaning your forehead gently on the glass. The car slows to a stop as the streetlight ahead flickers to red. Raindrops tap the windshield, and the wipers do their job. Silence, hum. 

"I think I love you." 

Oh. I think I love you. That's something you didn't see coming. 

Okay, you really thought that maybe, just maybe, Aki was done with blurting out shit you couldn't have expected, and maybe you were done with not being able to handle when his words go soft — but clearly, you were definitely, totally wrong. 

Your pulse is sent running wild, hammering in your chest, consuming every inch of you as a thick mess of thorns and roses in your throat. Warmth radiates through your veins, you're choked up. When you whip your head back towards Aki, he's got the same steady expression, his eyes are focused on the road ahead of him. He grabs the stick shift, pulling it into place without looking away. 

The car begins moving again. 

"You- Why-" You can't form coherent thoughts, nor coherent sentences. You shake your head, laughing a little; in disbelief or to ease the tension, you aren't sure, "Why are you telling me that right now?" 

"It was getting too quiet," Aki replies, matter-of-fact. His voice is as smooth as ever. God, his heart is pounding too, though, "And I'm tired of holding it in. I thought you'd want to know." 

Your foot taps nervously against the car's floor. 

"Of course I'd want to know," You answer, glancing down at your hands in your lap. You've laced your fingers together, and you're fiddling with your thumbs, "I just… you think? You said you think you love me, what does that even mean?" 

"No, I do," Aki corrects, his brows pinching, eyes narrowing. "I do love you. I'm certain. I've thought about it ever since then, ever since I met you." 

Ever since then. It feels like that night was so long ago, even though you can remember the details as if they happened yesterday. Does Aki remember them, too? 

Your voice lowers in volume considerably. "Is that really true?" 

"Yes, and I'm sorry. I wanted to tell you sooner. Work has held me up so much," Aki explains, "But I knew I couldn't wait any longer, I had to come see you once I realized how I felt. That's why I showed up at the club tonight. My division was supposed to go a couple cities over for an extraction mission today but… I canceled. So I could come tell you." 

"This is-" You swallow, your nerves feel like they're tingling, like your arms and your shoulders and your spine have nervousness dancing across them, hand in hand. You pull his jacket around you, balling up your fists in the fabric. The rich scent of his cologne surrounds you, stifles you. "This is what you were waiting to tell me, right? What you were going to say back at the club, before you stopped?" 

"Yes. Was it not what you were expecting?" 

You fiddle with his hair tie on your wrist, pulling it, and then letting go, making it snap against your skin. "I don't know. I guess it… It wasn't, no." 

Aki exhales a slow, steady breath. He keeps both hands on the steering wheel to keep them from shaking, gripping so tightly his knuckles turn white. 

"I mean, I want something with you Aki, I do," You're continuing, stumbling through your words, and he lets his grip loosen slightly. "It's just complicated. I've thought about it too, you know. And I want to make things work. But you're-" 

"A devil hunter." He says, completing your sentence. 

"Yeah. You are." You let go of a sigh. There's disappointment laced in your tone, a weightiness Aki can feel in his shoulders when he hears you speak, "You're busy doing important things, killing devils. Don't you have a goal, to kill the Gun? I know that's important to you, I wouldn't want to get in your way." 

"You won't." Aki replies sternly. "And I'm not always going to be busy. I'll make time for you. Missions won't hold me up as much anymore once all of this calms down, don't worry." His hands flex, bruised knuckles tensing, "I'll be able to spend time with you every day, if that's what you want. The Gun Devil isn't-" 

"You could die, Aki." 

Your words cut through him like a knife, making him freeze. His grip tightens on the wheel, his breath momentarily gets caught in his lungs. Worriedly, he glances towards you for a half-second, and he sees you staring at your lap. Your hands are balled up, your eyes are teary. Your voice is weak, and a shaky exhale causes your shoulders to slump. You lean forward as you curl in on yourself. 

"You could die, and then it wouldn't matter, I'd never see you again. Do you understand that?" Your jaw clenches, your fingernails dig into your own palm, "I don't want to lose you. I was really worried when you were gone for so long, Aki. I can't get attached to you if you're just going to… If anything happened to you, I wouldn't…" 

Aki listens as you trail off. He grabs the stick shift again, pulling it, and he focuses on what's ahead of him. 

He understands what you're feeling now, he knows it all too well. He knows what it's like to lose someone. Even just the anticipation of losing them, the thought that they might slip from your grasp one day is painful in itself. He's lost everything he ever cared for, over and over again, and he doesn't want that for you. He won't let you experience a feeling so lonesome. 

The truth is, he's never placed much importance on his own well-being. He'd accomplish his goals, or he'd die trying, that was the only promise he allowed himself to make. But things are different now. 

If it means breaking your heart, he doesn't care what he has to do, he won't be letting it shatter. He'll be safe, he'll keep you close. He won't make the same mistakes. In the end, even if things don't work out, if you'll give him one more chance to hold you, to understand you, to love you — whatever sacrifice he has to make, he will, and it'll be worth it. For you, he'd offer himself up to the altar. 

Aki stays silent for a while, thinking. You sniffle, and he gnaws frustratingly on his bottom lip. 

"I'll pull back more, then." 

That gets you to finally look up at him. Aki watches in the corner of his vision as you wipe your eyes with the back of your hand. Speaking softly, gentleness in his tone, he continues, "I'll stop fighting, stop accepting missions, stop killing devils. I'll pull back however much you want me to. However much will keep the both of us safe. So don't cry, okay?" He exhales, his expression growing complicated, "And I want you to know I'm done. I'm not going after the Gun anymore." 

This time, when you look at him again, your eyes are going wide. On your face, there's only pure, clear shock. 

You shake your head, and you stammer, "You don't… You don't have to do that, just for me." 

"I'm not. Believe me," Aki takes a quick, apologetic glance towards you. Then, he looks back at the road. "You're a big part of this, don't get me wrong. It wouldn't be fair to you if I told you I had feelings for you, and then went and threw my life away. That's what the expedition they're planning is, a suicide mission. Honestly, for me, this has been a long time coming." 

Still staring up at him, your eyes scan his face. He looks somber; columns of light travel over him as the car passes streetlamp after streetlamp, the glowing lights of the city reflect in his eyes, his earrings. The bridge of his nose crinkles for a moment. He stretches his fingers until the joints pop, he takes a deep breath in. 

"I'm tired, to tell you the truth." He says, his voice steady. His words are honest, comfortingly genuine. "I've been killing devils for years. Most of my colleagues didn't even last a few months. When they quit or they died, I kept going. I ignored anyone who tried to talk me out of it, I didn't listen to anyone's advice or my own doubts. I knew the path I was going down, but I thought this was what I had to do. Otherwise everything I'd been fighting for would be a waste." 

He lets go of the breath he was holding, nice and slowly. "But I was wrong. I want to change things, I don't want to toss my life away anymore- and for what? For a job that doesn't care, for a goal I can't accomplish? There's people I care about now, a life I want to protect. I can't be so careless anymore." 

You're silent, and Aki allows his shoulders to slump, unclenching his jaw, relaxing his grip on the steering wheel. 

"I want to make you happy," He says, his voice noticeably quieter than before. Now, his sentences are smooth, each one dripping with honey: "I want you to know how much you mean to me, because you mean so much, you really do. You're the one who helped me realize all of this. You're the reason I… I changed." 

He's right. He isn't the man you first met. The man who was devoted to his mission and his mission alone, who was prepared to fight until there's nothing left of him — but this, this is the Aki you knew. This is the kind, determined, lovesick man you couldn't resist falling for, even when you tried. Love has always defined him. He has love in his very bones and blood, in his touch when he held you, in his lips when he kissed you. You only needed him to realize what he wanted, what he deserves. 

After all, this fate is what the two of you were always destined for, wasn't it? 

Aki hadn't expected a proper response, he'd hardly realized how much he'd been talking until the car fell back into silence. He grits his teeth slightly, he thinks of apologizing. Or of stopping the car in the middle of the road to turn and give you a damn hug already — but ultimately, he relaxes at the sound of your laughter, he loosens up when he glances at you and sees you smiling. 

"You're sweet," You hum, leaning back into your seat, "Way too sweet. You're really such a sweet-talker. Did you know that?" 

"No, I didn't." Aki grins to himself. He almost misses his next turn when he's lost in thought for too long, and as his hands are turning the steering wheel, he's asking, "Back at the nightclub, there was something you wanted to tell me as well, wasn't there?" 

"Ah," You tut playfully, nodding, "You're right. I did plan on telling you something." 

"I told you what I had to say. It's only fair if you tell me your secret too. As long as you still want to, of course." 

"I don't really think it's much of a secret." You cross your arms over your chest, your cheeks hurt from smiling, "It is important, though. Super important. It might make our whole relationship different from now on. I'm not sure if I should even say it, but here goes. Back then, I was just… y'know. Going to tell you I'm in love with you." 

Aki softens, from his body to his core. His hands relax, he breathes a small tch sound and reaches down to half-heartedly push at your knee. 

"Stop," He huffs, the edges of his voice made tender by a laugh; the sound is simply delightful, "You had me worried, seriously." 

The back of your neck seems hot, and your head is fuzzy, filled with the same storm clouds as the ones that dot the sky. You fall silent for a while, staring up at him, admiring the gentle look of his face, the hazy glimmer in his eyes. The rain drums calmly, woven into you, your heartbeat a steady, anxious patter. 

Aki glances towards you for a second, "There was something else I planned to ask you. Once I told you how I felt." 

"Uh-huh?" You reply, hiding your emotions behind a raised brow, "What is it?" 

"I want to get out of the city for a while," He tells you, "And I want you to come with me. I thought we could plan a trip for a few days out. I still have all my paid leave days for work. Thought we could go somewhere in Kanagawa, like you wanted to. I can take you to that piercing shop. After that, maybe we can head somewhere remote. I've heard Enoshima is nice this time of year." 

You blink. Aki idly drums his fingers against the rim of the steering wheel, and he looks over at you, slightly shaking his head, "There's no need to answer right now, though. I just want you to think about it." 

"No, that sounds lovely," You say in response. You're grinning up at him, donning a warm expression he can feel settling in between his ribs, "It'd be really nice to go somewhere with you, take a little vacation, just you and me. I haven't been anywhere like that in forever, actually. It'll feel good to have some time off from work." 

Aki explains straightforwardly, "I'll cover the expenses. I was hoping to stay in Enoshima for a few days to a week, depending on what you wanted to do." 

"Anything is fine with me. But a whole week would be perfect," You stretch your arms out, as though you can almost taste the relaxation, "A week would give us enough time to decompress. If we could find somewhere quiet to stay, God, that'd be so nice. The city is stifling sometimes, isn't it?" 

"It is," Aki agrees, "Especially with how busy Public Safety has been lately." 

"I'm sure it's been crazy. You probably need a vacation more than anyone." Sighing, you lean your head against the seat's headrest. "Enoshima sounds nice. I saw a documentary about it one time. I remember thinking how nice it'd be to live there, to hear the ocean every time you wake up. It made me miss when I lived far away from here." 

He cocks a brow, "You aren't from the city?" 

"No, I moved here for school, way back when. I often wish I didn't. But then I wouldn't have met you." 

Contemplating your words for a moment, Aki's lips purse into a tight line. 

"I feel I've only grown used to Tokyo," He replies at last; gingerly, as though he's still caught up in what you just said, "I grew up out in the country, I really hated it when I was young. I'd feel depressed whenever I went back to visit my hometown, for a lot of reasons. But it just seemed… lonely. Doesn't help that it's always cold there too. Lonely and freezing, that's my hometown. Sounds like a place anyone would love to be, right?" 

Perhaps he does hate it, but it's where he grew up, it's someplace important. You bet if you went together, hands intertwined, bundled up close to keep each other warm, you could make his dreary hometown a whole lot less cold, and a whole lot less lonely. 

You huff a small exhale out through your nose. You can't help but laugh a little at Aki's flat attempt at humor. "Oh, for sure. Ugh, I can't stand the cold. It was warm where I grew up, even the cold in Tokyo is hard to manage. One of these winters, I'm definitely going to become a popsicle." 

Aki smiles, remarking to himself silently, doting internally on how cute you are. He likes this small talk, he enjoys learning new things about you, no matter how minor they may be. He commits your words to his memory. If you aren't fond of the cold, he'll have to carry his jacket more often, for you. 

The car draws to a stop in front of your apartment, and Aki pauses, he clears his throat. He turns towards you, his eyes flickering over you once, twice, before they come to rest on your gaze. 

"I'm sorry if I made things complicated." Turning the keys, he switches the car off — leaving only the noise of the rain to fill your ears, tapping in rhythmic whispers against the steel roof. 

"You didn't, don't apologize," You reply, shrugging your shoulders, "I'm glad you wanted to talk about things." 

"I'm glad you were willing to listen." 

You eye him curiously, "Were you expecting my response to be different?" 

"I think so, I wasn't sure," Aki frowns slightly, he places his hands in his lap, and he watches fresh droplets cascade down the windshield. "What I said to you is… a lot, probably too much to spring on someone so suddenly. I'm sorry for that. I didn't know how you felt about me, exactly. After I told you my own feelings, I was worried you might not want to talk to me again." 

"C'mon, why would I act like that?" You answer, your nose scrunching up, "I do want to talk to you. And I'm serious, I care about you, I really…" 

Abruptly, you let yourself trail off. Your expression shifts, you stare into Aki's blue eyes with an adoring look in the back of your own. A flash of love he'd liken to the ache in his chest, or to a fresh, sun-kissed sky. Faintly, you admit, "I really am in love with you." 

As much as he wants to speak, he can't help but be utterly quiet for a few long, drawn-out seconds. Aki blinks to stop the world around him from blurring, and you refocus in his vision; your form is the only thing he can see, the only thing he's ever needed. 

"I tried to forget you, you know," Aki starts. He faces forward, he speaks almost like he's only talking to himself, "I drowned myself in work for a while. I thought it might be best if we both moved on, if I didn't burden you anymore. But I couldn't forget. I couldn't forget you, or that night, or the way I felt. No matter what I did, I couldn't stop myself from falling for you." 

Work was tiresome, it did well to drain his energy, but it never took away the memories of you. It meant nothing to distract himself when your fate was already crossed with his. When love and devotion were potent in his veins, tenderness the only thing left of him. He's felt so much since he met you, emotions he doesn't deserve, warmth he still doesn't understand how to hold. You've made a home in his emptiness, given him something more to live for — How is he supposed to go on, if he can't provide you with the same soft safety? 

So he's going to try, truly, and honestly try. Things might not work out as perfectly as he wants them to. He's bound to make mistakes, he knows he has so much left to learn. Love is a concept oh-so foreign to him, but he wants to study how to love, he wants to grow as familiar with it as he is with strife and war and meaninglessness. He wants to discover all that love can be, with you at his side: a star in his palms, a promise of possibilities he's yet to explore. 

He'll keep you safe and happy, even if it means he must do so with the last of his breath. 

You're quiet, but Aki swears he hears you take a low, hitched breath. Gentler this time, burying his head in his hands with his forehead leant on the steering wheel, he keeps talking, he keeps divulging. 

"I didn't know what to do for a while. God, you're really something, you know? You had me lost in my own head for days," He sits up, swallowing the lump in his throat, "I realized after a while that I didn't care what happened next, as long as I could be with you. There's still so much I need to find the time to tell you. There's more I want to experience, so much I want us to do." 

When you're relaxing together in Enoshima, he wonders if he'll have time to ask you the dumb things he's been dying to know. No, he definitely will. He wants to know more about the place you grew up, and he doesn't mind telling you more stories from Hokkaido, in turn. Would taking you to Enoshima be considered a date? If it isn't, he wants to plan to take you on one — He'll ask you what restaurants you like to go to, what your favorite kind of flower is. 

He doesn't know if he could handle going on a date with you, honestly. He's never done that sort of thing, he knows what they do in movies but those are always exaggerated; should he be extra polite, or be lax about it? Would it be strange to hug you, to kiss you when he first sees you, should you go somewhere casual, somewhere fancy? 

Shit, if you were wearing some fancy outfit, a pretty dress with pretty jewelry, maybe even some makeup, there's no way in hell Aki could handle that. You'd look beautiful. 

Sighing, Aki tries to relax his clenched jaw, he turns towards you and he meets your eyes. Quietly, with his words full of devotion, he mutters the truth, and all he's ever been yearning to say. 

"I want to fall even deeper in love with you." 

The way you're staring at him rivals a deer in headlights, except you're shaking with a feeling truly pleasant, and there's warmth in your cheeks, budding flowers in your chest. The tension builds until it's almost palpable, until Aki is huffing awkwardly, leaning back in his seat with his arms crossed over his chest. He gives you a reassuring glance. 

"You don't have to say anything to this," He mumbles, and his tone is low, smooth with his usual seriousness, but his eyes are glimmering. It's as though you can practically feel the affection radiating off of him, like you're the Earth, and he's the sun. "I just… I wanted to explain how I felt. I'm sorry if I said too much." 

He doesn't know what he was expecting, but it wasn't for you to chime in with a call of his name. "Aki?" 

Aki turns towards you, "Yeah?" 

And then, faster than he can think, you're closing the distance between him and yourself. 

You're clumsily leaning over the small center console, you're grabbing him by the collar of his shirt and you're tugging him in for a kiss that burns, fire on his lips, a raging sea in his chest. But it's soft, you kiss him so softly yet intensely he feels himself crumble from the inside out. His emotions splinter, and you're putting him back together again. Your lips spell onto his own every possible thing he's been waiting to receive. 

You kiss him again, you crawl closer until you're settling in his lap, and both hands cradle his face. You brush his bangs behind his ears with your fingertips, and trace his jaw, his ears, the shape of his earrings. Your lips press to his with a tenderness he finds indescribable. You feel like fresh air, you melt him down to mold him as putty in your hands, to make him into a sculpture of your love. His head tilts with your own, he wraps his arm around the small of your back and your mouth on his sends him spinning, reeling. 

When you seperate for long enough to gasp, enough to realize your pulse is running wild, and enough for him to speak, he's working his hand up to hold your cheek, he's breathing against your lips, "I forgot how good it feels to kiss you." 

From now on, he won't forget. Each press of your lips on his stores in his chest as a faded blur. Your soft sighs against his mouth echo in his eardrums. His fingers run over the delicate shape of your face, and he comes alive on your lips, your soul devouring what remains of his own. He won't make it somewhere more pleasant, there's too much destruction in his bones. But Aki doesn't have to imagine what heaven is like, because he believes he's found it right here. 

"Tell me again," You're pleading once you pull away; you meet his eyes, you have his head tilted up, you're pressed close on his lap. And Aki smiles, a devoted, foolish smile. Sounding more teary, you beg this time, "I want to hear you say it again." 

"That I love you?" Aki whispers, holding your chin between two of his fingers. "Do you want me to tell you how much I've thought of you, how I missed you every single day we've been apart?" 

Leaning in, your head tilts to the side, and he presses a longing kiss over your cheek, "I could tell you how lovely you are, how beautiful I thought you were, even from the moment I saw you," A kiss to your nose, your jaw, the corner of your mouth — kisses alight on your skin like sparks, "Or should I tell you how lucky I am to have met you, how soft you've made me? How badly I wanted to let go of it all, so I could live a normal life with you?"  

Your heart is electric. 

Aki leans back, your chin still between his fingers. His gaze locks with yours. He's in every shaky breath you take, he's in your veins as they rush with adrenaline. He's on the tip of your tongue in the form of a name you could never forget. 

"I-" You stammer, "Aki-" 

"Your face is so warm, sweetheart." 

The smile he wears is gentle enough to purify you. He holds your cheek in his hand, his palm feels the warmth underneath, and you shiver, from your head to your toes. You've needed this, needed him. And now, you're never going to let him go. 

You knew you'd be drawn together once more, you've needed to know you and Aki would be more than two ships that pass in the night. He kept his promise to you, just as you always knew he would. You've crashed into one another again, and this time, you're going to let yourself drown. 

You rest your hands on his shoulders, gripping them tight as you try not to shake. Once again, you're the one choked up. There's so many things you want to tell him, but nothing will come out just right. 

So you take a shuddery breath, and you ask instead, "Do you really mean that?"

Aki answers with his smile only glowing brighter. "I have all night to prove it to you, don't I?" 

Your cheek cupped in his hand, he pulls you in, and you follow along with magnetism. 

Finally, he's been given a chance, an opportunity from you to change the path of bloodshed he's been walking. He won't let this go to waste. He can never fix his past mistakes, he can never bring back those he's lost. He doesn't need to. He can dwell in a peaceful life, he has Denji and Power and he has you. No matter what happens, he'll love you without regrets — endlessly, and unwaveringly. 

This life hasn't been kind to him. These new memories will be. He'll fill his head with visions of you, with the wind at your backs, and the ocean in his view. The water will wash over your feet. You'll feel the sand underneath. 

The salty sea, the beaches of Enoshima and the sight of the sunset over the water, rays of orange and purple and blue, will become his new favorite sight. But when he turns to you, when he sees the smile on your face and the sparkle in your eyes as you look over the water, in your own world, the one he's so desperately wanted to be a part of — In the end, you will become his fondest memory. 

You've got plenty of good things ahead of you. You will be the one to breathe him anew. 

And as the rain pelts the windows, and the sky collapses in, Aki kisses you, and kisses you, and kisses you. 

[inorheona]

rain photo study

[collgeruledzebra]

the thing about trying to recommend fiction podcasts to someone who isn't familiar with them is that not only are so so many genres represented but also the level of production can fall anywhere from "basically an audiobook" to "major motion picture minus the pictures"

[shepscapades]

Your highness… I don’t feel so good

[mildarka]

Felt like making a reverted AU

[soosoosoup]

Chord Striker Au by @thatbennybee

[mourninglamby]

ouchies

[lucabyte]

i feel like people are sleeping on the occam's razor situation of how buckwild it is to outright accuse a guy of being a clone of your friend even if you DO have a lot of circumstantial evidence. there's other options is what im saying. they could just be like. a guy. that's a sensible deduction. you should explore that deduction. ignore my shirt that reads I <3 RED HERRINGS.

i still think odile has the correct theory on lock but she's smart enough to know it needs like... a real smoking gun to be able to bring it up without sounding insane.

anyway. (mirabelle voice) i know its rude to speculate but has anyone else noticed the grieving? they seem to be grieving. does anyone have any thoughts on the grieving? i have some thoughts on the grieving.

[hugs-and-stabbies]

The self-awareness on this guy 😞 someone pls send him an "are you bi?" quiz STAT

[eddbone3ater]

girls, roommates even

mystreet redesigns this time because i think they deserve it

[evenlyevi]

Girls' night

[seventh-district]

Making Incorrect H:SR Quotes Until I Run Out of (hopefully) Original Ideas - Pt. 6

[Pt. 1] [Pt. 2] [Pt. 3] [Pt. 4] [Pt. 5]

[sheerakk]

[cinderoo]

pick your pairing

[izzystizzys]

As High Marshall Commander, a title foisted on him by the Galaxy’s fakest bitch aka Chancellor Palpatine, Fox theoretically has privileges and authorities like no other clone. In practice, he has a headache and gets ignored more obviously than before.

What he also has is a fancy new function on his personal comm unit modified to broadcast GAR-wide to all commanding officers, up to and including Jedi. It gathers dust next to his own modified button that sees much better use - a private channel to Stone, the only vod that will let Fox bitch at him to his heart’s content without hanging up (Thire) or bitching right back (Thorn).

It’s been a long shift of 72 hours, the maximum Stabby allows him to do without a well-placed hypo to the neck, when Fox finally collapses on his rickety cot in the Command quarters and hits the private comm connection to Stone without looking. He’s already rolling his eyes so hard it tweaks at the migraine that’s been building since hour 18 and heaving a put-upon sigh.

“Everyone is stupid, Stone, and asking to be thrown face-first from the Dome balustrades”, he begins, settling into a low, dead tone of voice to warm to the building monologue. It’s a marathon, not a sprint. “I swear to haran I’m going to wring Amedda’s stringy neck one of these days. I don’t know what magical Force gods his mother pissed off, but they made sure to punish her and the Galaxy at large a hundred times over. He sucks the joy and competence out of every room like a black hole of stupid. I’d call him a has-been, but I trust in the power of nepotism and also just don’t believe he ever was. I swear he’s doing it on purpose and - oh, kriffing Sith-damned hells, you know who’s definitely doing it on purpose?! The kriffing Chancellor, that wrinkly ass-faced ballsack!”

Taking a deep breath, Fox lets that sit in his chest for a moment, indulging in the feeling of bright weightlessness. “I swear he’s trying to keep the war going - no one man can be that incompetent and still draw breath, not even Amedda or Taa. Goddamn Taa - but anyways, kriffing hell, Stone, either the senility isn’t an act or he’s a bad cartoon villain from Dooby Scoo. Yes Sir, sending Senator Amidala to a Seppie-infested planet for negotiations is a great idea after her fourth bomb threat of the week. No Sir, I can’t hear you cackling evilly with Count Dooku under your lame two-credit robe as you’re definitely not colluding with the Republic’s enemies. What, you have a red lightsaber?! Oh, of course I don’t know what that means, I was dropped on the head as a tubie!”

Barely pulling in a harsh breath, Fox continues, palms pressing into his eyeballs hard enough to cause sparks. “And speaking of lightsabers and senile fucks, haran smite my ass off but who the kriff thought it’d be a good idea to give absolute tactical and military authority to the kriffing eldritch space monks! The Force didn’t bless them with the collective good sense it gave to a kriffing rock, and I’m tired of pretending otherwise! Has anyone kriffing read the Theed Convention of Sentient Rights in Wartimes?! NO?!! Well, color me UNSURPRISED, because war crimes ARE NOT! GOOD! BATTLE! TACTICS!!”

“They run around in crop tops, Stone, in crop tops! Oh, the Force provides - WELL I’M GOING TO PROVIDE MY FOOT UP YOUR ASS, AND IT’S GOING TO HURT BECAUSE YOU’RE NOT WEARING KRIFFING ARMOUR!”

“Sure, let’s send the preteens into active warzones under heavy artillery in kriffing party wear! Surely nothing will ever go wrong! And give them commanding positions equivalent to CC-clones, WHO WERE LITERALLY GENETICALLY CREATED FOR IT! WITH A DECADE OF INTENSE TRAINING! LET’S DO THAT, BECAUSE WE’RE ALL KRIFFING STUPID!”

He’s gesturing wildly at the ceiling now, face heating up as his blood boils beneath the surface. “And you know what really gets my lowers in a twist, apart from the preteen commanding officers and blatant kriffing high treason and war profiteering?! Is it the complete lack of recognition? Gratitude? Basic sentient rights?! No, Stone, no, I would take all that in stride if it meant I never had to see Skywalker and Amidala kriffing canoodle right in front of me again, and pretend like it isn’t the galaxy’s worst conflict of interest case in the making!”

“By all levels of Sith-hell, what the kriff is wrong with that woman? You have it all, you could have anyone, and you choose that twatwaffle?! And then they have the gall to lock themselves in a broom closet for twenty minutes straight and have me guard it! ‘Oh yes, Senator, naturally we all go rattling brooms with our good friends! Nothing dodgy happening at all! I definitely believe you were looking for detergent and have used a washing machine before!’ The absolute nerve on those two! And then last week - you’ll never believe this - High General Windu passed by, and I swear he looked like he wanted to throw himself off the roof! I’ve never been less impressed by anyone in my life, and I’m batch-mates with Bly!”

“Speaking of Bly, that little bitchtit - if I have to edit one more, one more kriffing propaganda piece of him staring at General Secura’s bits, I’m going to stab my eye out! And if I have to edit one more of Secura staring at his bits, I’m going to stab the other one out! The only good thing I have to say about them is they’re more subtle than Skywalker and Amidala, which means nothing really. I will never understand that woman - but then she’s worked with Jar Jar Binks for a decade and not had a nervous breakdown, so she either has nerves of steel or is on some good-ass drugs.”

“Girl, your choices. And you know what else is a choice? Kote kriffing roundhouse-kicking heads off droids when he has a perfectly good blaster right there! I don’t know what the Longnecks put in his tube, but I hope to kriff it’s not contagious. I’d say I’m glad he has Kenobi to keep him in check, but that man wouldn’t know common sense if it punched his nose clean off his face. Flirting with General Grievous, ugh. I’d say he can do better, but honestly, they deserve each other.”

“And Wolffe - “, panting, Fox pauses, considering. “Well, Wolffe is an asshole and stupid, and I hate him because he’s stupid and has a stupid face. Also he keeps drunkenly submitting adoption paperwork on General Koon’s behalf - I wish I could say something mean about that, but honestly, his existence is roast enough. Anyways, bitches are trying me today, and by bitches I mean everyone. Commander Fox signing off to go not commit treason, unfortunately.”

Thoroughly powered out, Fox sinks into his hard mattress with a deep sigh. Several seconds of silence reign, and then his comm unit starts blaring in alarm.

Somewhere in the Jedi Temple, Mace Windu is knocked flat on his ass by a gargantuan shatterpoint exploding.

[krittec]

there’s something extremely extremely creepy about taking an actor that you have known since they were 13 years old, only JUST a teenager, and making them kiss a fully grown woman the second that they turned a legal adult.

Steve Blackman already has a ton of shit out against him which came out recently so it unfortunately doesn’t surprise me that he would write something like this but it makes me genuinely concerned for everything behind the scenes.

There has been a HUGE problem in the Umbrella Academy fandom since season ONE when Aidan was a 13-14 year old of people writing insanely disgusting stuff and defending it because his character was mentally an adult but oh my god did they make it worse. You’d think they’d protect actor & character by avoiding any romantic interaction but instead you have him kiss an actress 15 years older than him. The age gap being the age that he was when they filmed season two. Quite honestly I feel that if he could’ve done this seasons previously and gotten away with it then he definitely would’ve done it, given the jokes that are actively made.

Quite honestly may Steve Blackman never work again if this is how he treats his actors because this is awful. I’m not even done with the season but that gave me very little desire to continue and this show has been important to me in ways I can’t explain. Maybe I am blowing this out of proportion but it feels so insanely creepy and horrific to me and I needed to rant.