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anerdinallherglory · 10 months ago

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Approaching Sun (38)

Author’s Note: Long note ahead.

You guyssss. I’m sorry for the delay. The Sasuke that I am writing is new territory for most of us. I write, then rewrite until it feels right. And I have never rewritten my own script as much as I did in this chapter. If you enjoy my writing, please take a chance on my live draft on Wattpad called Beneath the Hollow Grove. There will be romance, so the same chemistry between characters in my fanfiction is very likely to be appearing there. This chapter is dedicated to Teo and ttsukei. Thank you for your extra support and love. It means everything.

Approaching Sun will eventually come to an end (sad but rewarding at the same time). I am guesstimating a total of 42-45 chapters total. I never foresaw A.S. being as long as it is already, or taking as nearly as long as it has to finish it. To be honest, I started this years ago to improve creative writing with my OTP, and anticipated on ditching it when my ADHD got the better of me. But the community kept asking and I kept giving. You can thank those people if you have enjoyed it because this story was written 100% in return for their comments and support.

Also, if you enjoy my SasuSaku, you can find a one-shot I wrote before A.S. on Fanfiction.net/Wattpad by the name of “Sakura’s Letter.” It fits these A.S. characters well.

Last but not least, there is a facebook fanpage for A.S. at the link on my Tumblr if you’d like to join. Hoping to share further A.S. resources there after the story is complete.

Songs for this chapter: Technicolour Beat by Oh Wonder & Feel Something by James Young

Thanks always, ANerdinAllHerGlory

. . .

CW: Discussion of Suicide; read with caution

Pairing: SasuSaku

Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37

Chapter 38: Methods of Atonement & Eternal Burning

Just when Sakura thought the insect-glow induced spell might diminish or expire between them, she glanced over her shoulder as she bathed in the warm cave waters to see that Sasuke watched her from the bank. He sat familiarly reclined with an arm over his knee, and where Sakura might have expected his countenance to have once again returned to the smooth planes and carefully composed eyes of guardedness, she sucked in a breath to see an expression wholly new to her. His mouth was parted in a silent reverence as he beheld the cleansing paths her hands traced over her collarbones, down her neck and through her hair. Had she even thought Sasuke capable of looking at another human that way? Well, it lasted until she reached up and over her shoulder to run water down her back, right between her shoulder blades where Sasuke’s fingers had traced the Uchiha symbol. His countenance slipped, a frown of consideration deepening the lines between his brows.

Having an idea of his annoyance, she turned her back to him and smiled silently to herself when he stood, waded waist deep into the starry-lit water to join her.

“Washing already?” he murmured in that low Uchiha disappointment that told Sakura he was pretending to pout. And his faux ire at such a notion was pleasant enough to warm Sakura from within and she prided herself on her self-restraint in this moment, because she wanted to smile like an idiot until her face split at the creases of her lips.

With Sasuke’s strict abstinence of years and a single-sided willpower to outlast her own desires these last several months, Sakura was pleasantly astonished to discover that Sasuke Uchiha didn’t have such restraint in that moment. Turning her to face him, he stilled her efforts completely by touching his lips to hers. And the kiss was softer. Much slower than before. Like a whisper in a cave.

Sakura had always daydreamed about what sort of lover the untouchable Uchiha, Sasuke might be. She always expected him to be as Sasuke-ish about everything possible, including his love life. He would be the sort of man to keep his interactions with her formal in the public eye, respectable, reserved, and avoiding all physical contact that some couples easily flaunted for others to see. This was the reality that Sakura had long predicted and, therefore, accepted and did not anticipate Sasuke to be the sort of partner who, over the last couple of months, might secretly hold her hand while she slept, find excuses to be next to her, crave her touch in the private moments shared between them, and kiss her tenderly even after their bodies separated. As sad as that sounded, Sakura had predicted it, because despite how much she loved him, he was still going to be Sasuke, in the most adjective form possible of the word.

Which was why Sakura certainly had not expected the overwhelming passion of moments ago, the longing that passed between their mouths and the intensity of years’ worth of suppressed feelings into such a surmounting detonation. An explosion of celestial matter.

“It’s annoying,” he growled mischievously between their lips, tearing Sakura from her thoughts as she concentrated back on his current vexation. It had to be because Sakura had washed away the traces of Uchiha symbol he had marked between her shoulder blades. She laughed in response and continued to pull him deeper into the water, ignoring his attempts to stop her from erasing the evidence of his actions. Not even his devoted mouth making her breathless and his following steps as she descended into the river, was enough to prevent Sakura from completely submerging. And with her impossible human strength, she pulled him under after her.

Sakura saw his eyes widen in the dim glow of ethereal lights, and she grinned wickedly in return, just before complete and total blackness consumed them. The water was brisk but not freezing, the balmy cave already warming the new layers of flood water. In the depths, void of sound and light, she felt Sasuke’s arm twine around the dip in her spine, binding her body to his, and the lack of all other sensation made the grasping touch alleviate every nerve in her person. Like a healing salve to an old wound Sakura hadn’t even realized she still possessed, Sasuke’s touch was the remedy to every feeling of loss, every doubt, and confusion she had ever had in regards to him. His possessive touch that clung to her body like she was now an extension of himself made everything in the past suddenly forgivable even if what had happened wasn’t okay. It was forgivable because it brought them to this.

That look of reverence he had been appraising her with just a moment ago was completely replaced when they surfaced, an artificial glare of mild displeasure at being drenched completely eclipsing it. “Have I told you lately that you are the most annoying woman I have ever met?”

“Twice now in the last five minutes,” she giggled, wrapping her legs around his waist as Sasuke’s feet found the smooth underground surface once more. And that glare evaporated, turning back into veneration as Sasuke’s body reacted to her embrace. And Sakura realized that needed to say something now, before his knee found a chakra-controlled perch on the glassy surface of the water and he was pulling her up with him to take her between his body and the water below. She could see that he was already envisioning something of the sort in his mind.

“The last thing I want is for this between us to end,” she announced as she wound her greedy fingers through his wet hair—she had always imagined doing this very thing and it was so satisfying to finally be able to do so. “But we’re running out of time. I need to survey the area, and in the morning, I need to report to Katsuyu in Shikkotsu Forest and check on the men I’ve captured. Waiting for the off-hand chance that remaining members of Zenshin might discover our location won’t exactly get us anywhere.”

“You need food,” he whispered against her skin, and Sakura sighed as his wet hand slid up her back to reach the same spot where he had traced the Uchiha symbol earlier, giving up his quest and washing where she could not. She knew Sasuke would be sensible with her decision to move forward with her plans and reasoned that he would probably try to focus his attention back on his own mission of Kaguya once this electricity between them dissipated into a comfortable normal.

And as his words settled, Sakura realized she hadn’t eaten in almost forty-two hours and her stomach grumbled loudly to Sasuke’s victorious smirk as he successfully delayed their departure by a few moments more.

. . .

Sakura returned to the central cavern after a few private minutes to herself, the charred fragrance of something crackling over a fresh fire luring her from the enchanting tunnel of glowworms. The muffled roar of the waterfall was distant and had quieted significantly enough that Sakura could hear the crack of the fire as Sasuke roasted whatever little, unfortunate, and very possibly blind cave dwellers he had managed to find down here for them to eat.

“What are those?” she asked, crouching beside him to assess the row of tiny fish now charred and black on the skewers.

“Something between an eel and a fish,” he announced. “Neither and both. Living fossils only found in caves.”

Sakura raised an eyebrow as she investigated the freshwater fish. She couldn’t quite make out anything distinct about them now that they had been basically cooked to a crisp. Sasuke handed her a skewer and her ravenous appetite made her overlook the unfamiliar eel-fish quickly.

As she ate next to him, Sakura began to feel the contrasting shift in Sasuke’s demeanor. He ate silently, avoided her eyes, and kept the small space undisturbed between them as he stared off into the black beyond the illuminated circumference of their warming fire. Sakura stiffened in response, simultaneously annoyed at the change and nervous at its meaning. She searched his expression for any clue as to what he might be thinking and felt her stomach dropping the longer he refused to return her regard. Could a few moments apart have already cleared his mind and reset his determinations somehow? How could he go from “We won’t be able to go back from this” and “Until death” to being all hesitant again? Sakura halted her spiraling train of thought before she came crashing down like one of the stalactites hanging off the ceiling. Maybe it was something else and she just needed to address him directly. That was healthy, wasn’t it?

“What’s wrong?” she blurted. “You’re overthinking things aren’t you?” She was frightened that he would answer that with more silence or even worse, a declaration of how he had thought about what had happened, decided it was a mistake, and had changed his mind. But he laughed instead, that small, signature hmph of ejected air that had Sakura sighing in relief.

“There’s no going back now, remember?” she continued teasingly, capitalizing on his small sign of amusement at her words. “Because It’s too late to mope and reconsider how you’re not the best for me and blah blah blah.” She would do what many women often did when faced with uncomfortable couple confrontations. She would call him out on his thinking, his pattern of behavior that signaled her anxiety, and disguise it as a lighthearted chastisement and reminder. “We get to choose each other.”

“I meant what I’ve said,” he answered seriously before rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly as he fumbled for the words that always tangled in his throat. “But, I was irresponsible earlier and—I am sorry. What do I need to do for—Do you need anything?”

Oh. That. Sakura's face instantly reddened at the words, because she immediately knew what he was referring to and what exactly he had been hung up on until now. There were no precautions taken in the moment, and Sakura didn’t know if Sasuke’s questions were because he was worried Sakura might be angry about his carelessness after the fact, or worse, he might fear the possible consequences of such an impulsive choice.

Sakura assessed his own flushed face and he looked away again, firelight-reflecting eyes revealing the warring predicament she hadn’t been able to decipher up until now. She looked down shyly as well when she answered him.

“You don’t have to worry,” she whispered, genuinely hoping to ease his concerns even if a small part of her wished he didn’t have any. “I had prepared before… before the brothel. Just in case.”

And as his eyes snapped to her face, Sakura saw him set his jaw in understanding and trap the words he was holding there. Sakura didn’t make any adjustments to her phrase or retract her statement, because it was the truth of it, and even if it wasn’t the exact answer he cared to hear, she hoped it would be enough reassurance for him. Before Sakura had left Sunagakure, she had prepped the bag of contraceptives, taking several doses before handing over what was left to Tabi, the girl Sakura had entrusted the supplies to before she left. She hadn’t planned on using her body as Sasuke had originally feared she meant to do, but Sakura also wasn’t naïve to think she might be completely untouchable despite her claims to Sasuke that she was. As a woman, physician, and ninja, she wasn’t going to be unprepared walking into a brothel; she had also reminded herself that it would be a wise choice to get started on them anyway after expressing her desires to Sasuke about being more. Regardless, the contraceptive had been taken and the doses were supposed to last months per measurement, so Sakura wasn’t too concerned about her and Sasuke’s actions tonight.

When Sasuke stiffened and made to angle his body back toward the fire, Sakura reached out for his hand and gently grasped his fingers, a now special form of communication between them. In the beginning of their traveling together, the tender touches between them had been the first blessed crack in the ice constructed walls of Sasuke Uchiha—the big bang initiation that led to the them of now. And she hoped the gesture would work for her again as she used it once more to bring him back to the warmth they had discovered together behind those walls.

Sakura focused on her courage, fighting to have the desire to stay on the topic while it was before them. Even if her preservatory instinct was to move on from the subject as quickly as possible, Sakura knew that the mature, responsible thing to do would be to discuss it. Thoroughly, so that they could come to an agreement, find common ground, and try to be on the same page heading forward. It was a condition to their partnership that they had long since established: communication.

“Sasuke, I understand if you don’t want a family right now.” And he was looking away from her again as he, too, struggled to overcome the new discomfort of serious “couple” conversations between them. Sakura’s heart panged as she thought that maybe this nervousness meant that Sasuke Uchiha would never want children, even with her. She told herself to breathe, and not jump ahead, but she couldn’t resist voicing her fear: “Do you never–"

“It’s not a never,” he shuttered, finding her eyes with his own. “It’s just—my mission concerning Kaguya is unforeseeable.” He found her eyes and looked down when he saw the sadness his response instantly elicited in her face. He rushed to add, squeezing her fingers back. “But I promise to fight for that future. I’ll find the Otsusuki race. I’ll make the world safe so I can come back to you.”

Sakura nodded, her heart still feeling unsettled at such a promise. She reminded herself that by choosing Sasuke, she was choosing him and him alone. She wouldn’t force him to abandon his goals in order to be a husband and a father. “Even if we spend our lives like orbiting stars, passing one another in the night,” she had promised. “The miniscule amount of time I spend next to you will be more than I would want with anyone else.” It was her own vow to him, and Sakura had never meant truer words. Sakura knew what this life meant, and she could tell by the look on his face that he was worried, already concerned that she was regretting. And maybe in her heart, she was disheartened that their reality would be a difficult one. Sakura would be sacrificing several dreams, and she would have to make her peace with it all in time, because despite it all, she wanted Sasuke more than anything else. She also wanted a peaceful future, and Sasuke was the only person, in a combined effort with Naruto’s future leadership, capable of ensuring that it came to pass by fulfilling his side.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered as he shook his head, and Sakura saw him steel himself with a breath before forcing out, “I’m already sorry for so much. I think I’ll live our entire lives being sorry, Sakura.”

She gently squeezed his hand and shook her head as well. “I meant what I said too. I want this life with you, whatever it looks like. And of course, I eventually want a family with you, but only if that’s what you want, too. It comes second to everything else. Or not at all. Okay?”

He nodded in obvious relief and, to Sakura’s continuing list of surprises, pulled her to him. Her hands found his chest to brace herself and he inhaled the scent of her hair, whispering an apology in the crook of her neck. She kissed his lips sweetly with a comforting smile, but Sasuke took advantage and kissed her again, fervently, tenderly, consolingly in return. And Sakura decided to let him push her to the ground beneath him where his hand slid up her thigh. Somewhere in the back of her mind, Sakura made the connection that Sasuke’s conversation skills were barely adequate, but that in the private moments between them, he would choose to compensate for it with the language of bodies. This, too, was not what Sakura had expected, but it made sense that the stoic, awkward Uchiha might choose to express himself with the dedicated dialect spoken with the only other person who could receive, comprehend, and appreciate that language. With her legs tossed over his shoulders, and her fingers in his hair, and Sasuke’s head between her thighs, Sakura submitted completely as he made her forget her current and future grievances. He devoted his apology to her body like an act of repentance, and Sakura decided she would take him, take the man who promised a lifetime of regretful apologies, if this was his method of atonement. Sakura didn’t know that apologies could come in the form of slow arousals, roaming tongues, and—holy shit, suction. The sound of his own name from her mouth was the only verbalization of forgiveness that Sasuke needed in their mutually exclusive vernacular.

Sasuke was a fucking idiot. He had thought this to himself as he fisted each and every eel fish coasting below his feet, as he tried to explain his thoughts to her about starting a family, and even now as he stared at her back as they lay tangled together in sleep for the second night. Adding to the list of self-deprecations, Sasuke cursed himself for foregoing the Uchiha symbol on his clothing several years ago as an act of penance. At the time, Sasuke had felt that in order to preserve whatever was left of his clan’s dignity, he needed to part with wearing the symbol until after he felt properly atoned. He didn’t want his past and image to represent the Uchiha, furthering the disgrace of his clan in the eyes of those who knew their history or was learning of it for the first time. But as he had traced the symbol between Sakura’s shoulder blades, Sasuke had had the realization that Sakura, the only other person to bear the Uchiha name, was now going to be the new face representing their clan. In contrast to himself, Sakura had always been unwavering in her goodness, unblemished by wrongdoings, and righteously leading a new generation of mental health advocates and creating new healthcare standards. Her reach would know no bounds and there wouldn’t be a better individual walking this dimension to wear the Uchiha crest, to start a new history associated with it. It wouldn’t be Sasuke leading the Uchiha clan into the future; it would be her.

Which is why he was cursing himself now for not possessing at least one article of clothing with his crest so that he could be staring at her back in the firelight as she boasted the mark that identified her to the world as an Uchiha and as his. Did that make him a possessive bastard? Probably. But it was an Uchiha trait to be so and Sasuke was more Uchiha in both good and bad senses of the word than many before him.

And, he thought privately to himself, if his actions of last night bore the natural consequences, there could be two individuals aside from himself demonstrating to the world what the Uchiha could be. Which is why he was a fucking idiot. Because fuck, he wanted that reality as much as his next breath of oxygen. He wanted to be staring at his family’s backs as a miniature raven-haired child clung to his wife’s hand through a busy Konoha market street. It was why he had made a mistake last night, choosing to recklessly chase his high with abandon because it was the dream he wanted—knew that at the end of the day, was what Sakura wanted too. And that’s why it had devastated him to make that apology to his new wife, prepared to do what he needed to do to not force the responsibility of a child on Sakura alone while he had no choice but to continue on his mission to find those who Kaguya feared, the rest of the Otsusuki race.

He had even fucked up that apology, incompetently trying to form the words. How did he tell the woman he had just tied to himself in a cave of stars that he fucking wanted to watch her grow heavy with the swell of his child while simultaneously dreading the reality of what that would mean for her. And for him. He would miss it. He would miss all of it. He had promised Sakura a fifty-fifty partnership, and Sasuke had only just realized how badly he would fail that promise.

And these thoughts continued into the morning as the fissure in the ceiling went from boasting the brightest of stars above them to the thin purpling stripe of summer dawn, and Sakura rose from their tangled sleep, a new set determination in her shoulders to handle the members of the organization she had sent days ago into the home of her personal summon, Katsuyu.

“What’s your plan?” he asked as she turned to face him, triple folding his borrowed black trousers along her hips to make them fit better. They still hung loosely around her calves and she rolled the arms of his long sleeved shirt until the cuffs were chunky and hit her wrists exactly. He raised an eyebrow appreciatively knowing that Sakura was just making do, but the vision of her sporting a modified version of his attire sent his mind back into a perilous orbit.

“You’re not going to like your options in my plan,” she announced, oblivious to his wandering eyes.

That statement was more than sobering and it instantly put Sasuke on guard. He frowned at her.

She swallowed before saying, “You can stay here and focus on your—"

“Don’t finish that sentence,” he bristled as he interrupted her, getting really tired of hearing that phrase come out of her mouth—even though he had been the one say it a million times before this. He guessed that he deserved to hear it as often as he had said it. “I’m going with you.”

The absolute irony of his words hit them both immediately as he said it.

The pink-haired kunoichi laughed and rubbed the back of her neck as she bluntly said, “Then your second option is to be very still while Katsuyu swallows you whole, and I release her summoning back to Shikkotsu Forest. It’s the only way for you to get there. Just like the rest of them.”

Sasuke’s eye visibly twitched. “And option three is?”

“You could walk, but it would take you weeks to catch up, not to mention how much work it would take to avoid the hazards of Shikkotsu Forest such as beasets, acid pools, and toxin seeping trees.”

Sasuke tried not to be miffed that she was suggesting it might be difficult for him to traverse Shikkotsu Forest, even though he had spent the last several years exploring similar dimensions, but he trusted that if she was saying that it was bad, then it probably very well was. “And you were planning on transporting these people back to Konoha, how exactly?”

“The same way I plan on getting you in and out.”

He groaned and she smiled innocently.

They had to get these people back to Konoha somehow. Not to mention the dozens of Zenshin members Sasuke had tossed into a dimension two days ago, telling them to begin their walk northeast for about thirty kilometers where they would find a stash of supplies Sasuke kept there to sustain them while they waited for his return. He hadn’t bothered to explain that if they weren’t at the designated spot, where the dimension spaces crossed with the Leaf Village, they would eventually die in that dimension. At the time, he hadn’t quite cared what happened to them in there, and he selfishly hadn’t spared them another thought sense. Sasuke supposed that it was a tiny reason to speed things along so he didn’t have any unnecessary victims, even if they did deserve it, at the very least, for not being able to follow simple instructions. He just didn’t want to have to explain it to Sakura.

And the next thing Sasuke knew, Katsuyu was being summoned and Sasuke was resigned to a slimy fate of the inching human-sized slug as it ascended his body. And that pink-haired woman of his had the absolute audacity to declare teasingly with a grin, “It would be easier if you were laying down,” but he only glared at her with his most severe displeasure, not having the time to respond or even scoff before the damn thing had consumed his face entirely. And as Sasuke was encapsulated in a bath of mucus, water, and salt—yes, it somehow got in his fucking mouth (probably when he lifted his lip to sneer at Sakura’s black-streaked cheeks and sadistic expression)—he realized with a newfound appreciation how endearing Aoda seemed in comparison. That was indeed one beautiful snake.

And within moments, Sasuke found himself on his back, eyes projected toward a tree canopy so dense, the light struggled to penetrate below, creating a blue-green cast that darkened the forest around him. Travelling from the aphotic void of the underground sanctuary of seconds ago to the ear-piercing hum of the insect and amphibian infested jungle of a forest, left Sasuke feeling deafened by the abrasive cacophony. In a satirical form of irony, Sasuke suddenly wasn’t so opposed to the slug form currently detaching itself from his face and ears. Katsuyu, the source and embodiment of healing itself, even left the Uchiha feeling more restored than before which made Sasuke just the tiniest bit sorry for his initial disgust towards the creature. He bit back his urge to say something in condolence to the beast who had no initial indication of his discomfort to begin with, so Sasuke bit his lip, feeling all sorts of confused feelings in that moment.

“Sasuke,” the slug spoke to him in her singsong of a voice, “Milady will be present shortly, appearing where my main body is two miles north of here. She asked me to deposit you here to help corral a man back to the central location. He has wandered to this location.”

Sasuke instantly frowned at the slug’s words. He supposed some silent conversation had happened between Katsuyu and Sakura in the minute it took to transport him. That, or this was some clever way to distract Sasuke while she took advantage of the distance he still had to traverse. Hadn’t the kunoichi just told him that the Shikottsu Forest was a hazard maze? Well, she obviously had more faith in his abilities than she had let on when discussing option three, the annoying tease.

Sasuke took in his surroundings more carefully, trees taller than the Hokage Monument towering to the sky as vines thicker than Aoda twisted up and around them. It made the forest where the Chunin Exams were held almost miniature in scale. Sasuke supposed it made sense that beasts of gargantuan size such as the three Sanin summons to have come from even larger habitats, environmental determinism and all that.

A thick fog hovered above the ground, and Sasuke stood and leaned his head up to view the treetops above, breathing in as he activated his ocular jutsu, the tomoes spinning into both red and purple eyes. With his dual dojutsu, Sasuke surveyed the area more closely, peering beyond the fog blanketed trees in front of him, where the treacherous swamp and pools of bubbling black acid threatened to pull him into a fiery oblivion like the siren call of an eternally burning river in hell. Sakura had been right to warn him of this place; she had personally encountered Kaguya’s acid-sea dimension, after all. Acid didn’t stop burning until it could be scrubbed from the skin. Falling in a lagoon of it would be the absolute worst of deaths. Sasuke moved forward, toward the chakra network and watery outline of the soul he was supposedly sent to retrieve. Approximately fifty meters beyond the trees in his immediate vision, Sasuke analytically watched the flickering figure before him, their heartbeat speedily beating as they stood erect, still, and unmoving.

Sighing, Sasuke moved toward the individual, slowly and silently, contemplating what exactly Sakura had expected him to do. It was indeed perilous, to navigate the small path that winded between acid reservoirs, and Sasuke’s footfalls were near silent as he proceeded with slow and deliberate caution. The physical form of Sasuke’s fixation materialized from the mist, a man who stood before one of the black, endless, gurgling acid ponds. The stranger’s back was turned to Sasuke and, unexpectedly, the man’s head tilted in Sasuke’s direction as he detected the Uchiha’s approaching presence. Sasuke raised an eyebrow privately at the man’s perceptiveness despite Sasuke’s silent footfalls. He had to be a ninja, then, without a shadow of a doubt, if he was able to sense him.

Sasuke took in the man’s appearance more carefully: tall, dark hair, a tailor-fitted suit as if he were some sort of mobster instead of a ninja. Of course, that suit now displayed various tears and holes, the wearable evidence of days in the Shikkotsu Forest. Was he missing a shoe?

“Reaper?” came his voice next, a resigned, melancholic breathlessness as if he were talking to himself rather than acknowledging Sasuke’s presence.

Sasuke was getting that sort of association a lot lately. If the world continued to sense him as such before they even knew him, was he honestly doing a well enough job redeeming himself? He shook the thought away.

“But I haven’t done it yet,” the man whispered again, just before toeing the pool of acid with is remaining shoed foot. He screamed instantly when the acid ate through the leather of his sole and found his toes. He bent, ripping the melting shoe away. Well, that explained the first shoe, then, Sasuke assessed. And then Sasuke’s gut was sinking as the man straightened his back, finding the resolve to do it again, and the entire situation started to make a lot more sense to him. Just exactly why Sakura had sent Sasuke to retrieve him. The slug had known what the man was planning, what was about to happen.

The man was going to jump—all in, at once. He bent, sucking in a loud breath as if he were about to dive. And then propelled his body into the air. And Sasuke’s Rinnegan was activating before he could even register his choices. And within seconds, Sasuke’s body had replaced the man with himself feet above the black abyss of acid, and now he was on the planned trajectory of the consequences of this man’s suicide attempt. And before Sasuke could even question whether or not a ninja might be able to direct chakra and walk along the surface of acid like they did water, the Eternal Mangekyo of his right eye was spinning, and the skeletal arms of his imperfect Susanoo shot out and braced their hands on either side of the acid pond. Sasuke sneered in the man’s direction after he righted himself and stepped down onto the bank and stalked back toward the man who now lay sprawled where Sasuke had just been standing seconds before.

The giant fist of the Susanoo shot outward, collecting the man into its glowing grip, the blazing yellow eyes of the Susanoo’s face inches from his own.

The man cried out in surprise, probably believing that he had indeed fallen into the realm that came after death. But his next words gave Sasuke pause. “Who’s there?” Despite the man’s initial fear, Sasuke suddenly realized that he wasn’t seeing the Susanoo at all. He felt the grip that held him, the crushing digits of the chakra-controlled entity, but he cast his wide eyes about as if not sure where he should be looking.

And then Sasuke saw it. The dirty bandage-wrapping that had fallen from his eyes at some point to rest around his neck like a prophetic noose. Because the man had been correct. It was the Reaper that had found him. Sasuke was going to finish the man himself because recognition hit the Uchiha in full force. He had seen this ninja before in the memories of that girl at the brothel. Before him was the ninja who had pulled Sakura into his lap and touched her black-dyed hair as if she had been his to do so. Rugo. That was the name Sakura had relayed to him over a campfire in a cave, and Sasuke had let the name sear a hole into his memory the same way the flames of that fire burned into his vision. He would never forget it.

“You were right the first time,” Sasuke smirked, gladly becoming that deathbringer of his fear, the darkness in the Uchiha like an incurable itch that he sometimes craved to scratch. Even though it was when he indulged himself, that he got into trouble, Sasuke still couldn’t resist the urge when it came to defending his friends.

“Uchiha,” Rugo breathed, more solid but still another fearful recognition coming from his lips. “You might as well be.” He grunted as the Susanoo’s fingers tightened as if they were Sasuke’s own.

“That’s right.” Sasuke confirmed, that characteristic drawl he used with his enemies coming back full force out of Sakura’s company. “You should have been faster. There’s nothing that burns like the black flames of Amaterasu. It doesn’t stop burning until there’s nothing left. The acid would have been a mercy in comparison.”

A steely calm came over Rugo’s face and Sasuke didn’t quite care for it. “I don’t know where she is. I had found her. Begged her to help me. And the next thing I knew, I woke up in this godforsaken place with those bastards for company.”

Sasuke registered his words with that signature “hn,” of acknowledgement, but nothing more. But internally, Sasuke was at war with himself. This was one of the men who had touched her. Sakura, his Team 7 teammate. And now she was more than that; she was his. This bastard had touched his fucking wife. The scene of that girls’ memories played over and over in his mind like his own personal hell of Sharingan genjutsu. But all he could hear was her. Those convicting words of her letter playing in his skull, still tucked against his chest as if it could be the second heart to operate and stand in place for his blackened one: ‘remember who you are.’ Damn, he really wasn’t trying hard enough honor his promise to himself, was he? Quite frankly, Sasuke didn’t want to. But Sakura’s order through the memory of mud and rain pounded in his ears as she yelled: “This isn’t who you are anymore! You can be merciful!” A declaration of weight whispered in a cave between bent heads came to him next: “You’re not a monster. Naruto and I will not let you be a monster.”

Sakura had sent him here. Knowing everything she did, the woman he loved still believed it was going to be Sasuke who would be the best between the two of them to retrieve this man. And he was suddenly very annoyed with her unwavering faith in him because it suddenly made Sasuke feel like he had to be worth that faith. Damn slug should have just left the issue—let the man do as he pleased.

Aw, fuck. Fine.

Sasuke sneered as he dropped the man to the ground before him, his Susanoo of chakra retreating back into the essence of him. The man scrambled to his knees and Sasuke turned and began to walk off before he changed his mind. “You’re very fortunate that the woman you speak of spared your life,” he drawled. “It’s the only reason I do now.” And after the wide eyed, unseeing man blanched, Sasuke added: “But by all means—don’t let me get in the way of what you were doing.”

The man nodded once, that serious, resolved expression returning to his ashen face.

But even as Sasuke put distance between them, his feet slowed when Rugo’s voice carried after him. “You’ve found her then. It’s the only way you would know how we got here. That’s good.”

Just keep walking, Sasuke told himself. Let the man do as he wished. He would tell Sakura that he hadn’t killed the man, at the very least. And what else could she honestly have expected of him? What was he supposed to do? Talk to him? She was delusional. Grab the stranger by the collar of his suit and corral him back toward her, the last person he wanted within a mile of her? Hmph. Unlikely.

“It must be wonderful,” Rugo exclaimed as he found a tree to lean back against. “To look at her. To watch that mouth and that hair.” The man let out a small groan. “I can only imagine it. She was the last woman I ever laid my eyes on. Not a bad view, for the last thing to see.”

Sasuke closed his eyes as the manipulative declaration designed to ensnare his rage hit his ears. And his feet came to an abrupt halt. He counted to three before he spoke next. “You really do have a death wish, don’t you?” Fucking bastard, testing his fragile resolve.

“You’re a fool to let her do what she did,” Rugo announced, and Sasuke wondered where all of a sudden, he found the fucking nerve. Probably was trying to get the Uchiha to run him through with his katana or burn him alive with unrelenting flame. “Now, Mozai will do more than just kill her. He’s vengeful, and he will make her pay for what she’s done personally. She’s done nothing but paint a bigger target on her back. And you let her.”

Sasuke had never been so tempted to laugh. As if he could stop that woman from doing anything she set her mind to. The two of them were alike in that way. “And if he ever dares to come close enough, he’ll see her back for himself and learn exactly who she is now and who he dares to fuck with.” Because Sakura Haruno was an Uchiha now, and he would soon show the world that. She would wear his crest. Their symbol. He had already decided it, but it was without question now. He would beg her if he had to.

Rugo laughed, and Sasuke turned to see him bend forward over his knees. “It won’t be enough.”

“Then tell me how to find him,” Sasuke drawled again. “I’ll kill him right after I’m done killing you.”

“I don’t know where he is. He could be anywhere. He is never in the same place, always moving.”

“There’s not a corner in this world where I have not been,” Sasuke told him. “I’ll find him soon.”

“That’s a relief. Good riddance.”

And Sasuke was a little curious to know why this man was even with them if he expressed hate for the leader. Rugo had said something about begging Sakura to help him? And Sasuke eyes flickered back toward the man’s bandages as Sasuke made the connections. He was blind. He was able to recognize Sakura in a brothel despite being so. She had been the last person he had seen before blindness… The war, then, Sasuke concluded. Rugo had been injured in the shinobi war.

“Is that why you’re set on killing yourself then?” Sasuke asked after a second of indecision. He was in the limbo of not caring, and being mildly curious simply because Sakura had been involved in some way. His interest was more along the lines of knowing one’s enemy and their motivations. “Because you lost your vision?” Sasuke scoffed cruelly.

“You couldn’t possibly understand, so don’t pretend that you do,” came Rugo’s angry accusation. “You’ve been blessed with the visual prowess of gods. You get to see the people you love.”

Sasuke sighed. He really wanted to just walk away, but for some reason, Sakura was always involving him with people who needed some sort of reality check. Sasuke wasn’t Naruto, but damn if he didn’t always end up in situations where he knew exactly what that idiot might say to these men. Something about joining him on his journey to bring peace to the shinobi world as if he were some sort of Saint to be followed. And hell, it had worked on Sasuke and many more, hadn’t it? Sasuke sighed in decided annoyance. Sasuke wasn’t inherently good like Naruto, but he had learned a few things over the last few years to draw upon for this speech. Especially in the last few months.

“I would give it up in an instant,” Sasuke told the blind man. “These eyes are a curse. They come with power and responsibility. If I could trade them for the life of peace that you could have, I would switch places with you this very second. Even with my vison intact, I soon won’t see get to see the people I care about most for a very long time. But if I were you, I could still hear her. Touch her. Not a second spent, would I miss these eyes and the mission that comes with them.”

And how true it all was. Because Sasuke had been literally blinded for a year after the war as he sat in a prison cell in Konoha with his eyes sealed and covered. But as he looked back on it now, it had been such a peaceful year, knowing that it was all out of his control and it was alright to do absolutely nothing for a year. And then she came. Every day, without fail. Just as his friend had attended his bedside in their youth, Sakura had come to visit him. She was only allowed forty minutes to check on him as a physician, and they didn’t talk much at first. But damn, if it didn’t quickly become the forty minutes of every day that he looked forward to. Now, he realized it might have been the only thing to carry his sanity out of that endless darkness.

If he were blind like Rugo, then maybe he could be present. His lack of power would make it so. The job of hunting down the Otsusuki race would fall onto someone else’s shoulders. And in exchange, maybe Sasuke could be there every day. Wake beside her every day. Touch, taste, fuck, and hear her tell him that she loved him over and over. Have children with her. Hold their tiny bodies against his chest as he whispered his own declaration of love to them. Every. Day. Even if he had to tolerate Naruto’s nonsense daily for the rest of his life, it would be worth it. He would be the better man, and leave the fallen Sasuke behind.

“Get up. Come to the Leaf. Live a simple life. And if you must be ambitious, fight with us to create a world of peace for the next generation.”

And as Rugo’s sightless eyes filled with tears, Sasuke felt a little more like Naruto. Because he meant those words.

“Took you long enough,” one of the men spat in Sakura’s direction as she stared down the twenty-seven individuals who were now looking back at her as an enemy; there was a narrowing of the eyes, a hesitation in their shoulders, and the erratic exchanging of nervous looks, that was not displayed back at the brothel when they merely thought she was an instrument of sex. In the span of a few days, she had taught them the mistake of underestimating someone.

They were gathered around a campfire, cooking some poor scrap of a thing they had managed to catch in these woods. They should consider themselves lucky that they hadn’t become the meals themselves here. If not for Katsuyu’s looming gargantuan presence nearby that warded away other predators, they undoubtedly would be. Many of them appeared haggard around the firelight and the dense tree coverage combined with the dimming sky already gave the appearance of night. Owls of monstrous size hooted in the distance, already eager for the night and the prey it would bring them. The members of Zenshin, in contrast, did not seem as keen. They sat huddled together as if in perpetual watch for whatever beast might pay them a visit tonight.

“I’m sorry,” Sakura smiled brightly despite their stabbing glares, “afraid of the dark, are we?”

There were murmurs of varying degrees of bitterness and disbelief. There were even some choice words Sakura ignored completely as she moved into their company. They were like wolves, snapping and growling as she got near them, and like wolves, a few of them decided to charge her.

The first man, the loudmouth of the group whose person Sakura had originally aimed for first back at the brothel, and then used his identity to fool his friends later, boldly sprinted in her direction. With murderous, bloodshot eyes and a gaping mouth, he brought his open hands together at the thumbs as if he meant to choke her, but Sakura quickly remedied his mistake. Her foot shot out, her monstrous strength sending him hurtling into the gigantic tree in their immediate proximity. There was a crunch and a splintering of wood, and Sakura felt more sorry for the tree than the man who would walk away fine after she healed him. Sakura couldn’t say the same for the poor, hollowed out tree. She winced, already prepared to apologize to Katsuyu for the violation of the sacred forest.

“Araki!” came a feminine screech as the man slid down from the tree like one of Katsuyu’s many slug divisions, and he crashed to the forest floor with a groan. Recognizing the voice who had called out to him, Sakura quickly identified the white-haired, Boil Release Kekkei Genkai ninja whom Sakura had battled with days ago. She stood from where she was sitting among the men next to the fire and she pointed an accusing finger at Sakura as she screamed, “You bitch! That wasn’t necessary!”

“Hello, again,” Sakura waved and the girl growled as she fisted both her palms with radiating fury. “Mind if I sit?” Sakura asked unbothered, before coming as close as she dared to the group, a body’s space away from the fire and sat crisscross as a large scroll materialized with a poof in the palm of her hand. She unfurled it, a white, encrypted document that served as a dividing line between them.

Staring back at their blank, confused expressions, Sakura got straight to the point. “This is the warrant for your individual arrests by both Sunagakure and Konoha as declared, signed, and sealed by the Fifth Kazekage and Seventh Hokage respectively. Each of you will receive a minimum of ten years in either correctional facility on the account of trespassing, kidnapping, attempted murder, or at the very least, illegal engagement in sexual acts for compensation.”

As she spoke, the outrage grew loud again but it fell on deaf ears as Sakura continued to read the document.

“However,” Sakura added with the snapping of the scroll as it tightly retracted back into form. “You will be given the choice of where to serve your sentences.”

The outrage quickly grew to silence as Sakura modified the original, documented warrant with her own condition.

“You can serve your various sentences back in Sunagakure, where the Kazekage eagerly awaits you. While serving your sentence, you will become potential new test subjects for the Kazekage’s new Mental Health clinic, and simultaneously perform excavation indentures to further create the sand dungeons you’ll be staying in.”

Their faces paled, so Sakura informed them of their second choice. “Or, you may return with me to Konoha where you’ll quickly be enrolled in the Mental Health clinic already established, perform community service, and also qualify for parole based on good behavior and reform. Those are your two options.”

And of course, there was always that wise guy who had to add: “And what makes you think we will go willingly to either?”

“You see,” Sakura smiled again, leaning back on her arms as if she were content to rest there. As if it were just another night around the warm campfire for Team 7 as they traveled for a mission. She gestured to the buzzing forest around them that grew darker by the minute. “Coming with me will be the only way to leave this place. You’re more than welcome to stay here and try to find your way out on your own. But I wouldn’t recommend it.”

They carefully considered her words after that. They exchanged petrified glances and shook their heads at one another.

“Perfect,” Sakura clapped her hands together in artificial delight, retrieving a separate scroll from thin air and an ink brush followed after, plopping onto the ground as it was summoned. Sakura unfurled this one too, a red blank document that she instantly divided down the center with the following two headings: “Konoha” and “Sunagakure.” She glanced over their shoulders to regard Araki first, who still lay unconscious in front of the tree he had been hurled ungracefully in to. She wrote down his name first and said to herself: “Araki, Konoha.”

“You can’t choose for him!” seethed the white-haired female who had returned to a seated position at some point, but still stared into Sakura’s person as if she could boil her alive just from staring at her. Sakura made a mental note to stay out of touching distance from her. This girl didn’t seem the type to retain information from the lessons others taught her.

“I can,” Sakura responded, “because he is going to need medical attention and will need to come with me in order to do that. Should I mark him under ‘Sunagakure,’ instead? If he lives from that, you can explain why you made that decision for him.”

The girl didn’t respond and so Sakura left it. “Ok then. Who else chooses Konoha?” There was a hesitation at first as no hands were raised. But a motion in the back caught Sakura’s attention. Not looking at her directly, a man sporting a familiar red, hooded cloak raised one of his mutilated and scarred hands. Sakura winced as she recognized the man who had attacked her, groping at her body before Sasuke ignited him with black flames.“Remember that I spared your life,” she had said to this man after interfering in Sasuke’s torture-attempt, and Sakura didn’t know if he raised his hand now because he felt indebted to her, needed further medical attention for his hands, or something else. But it didn’t matter, because like the first rain drop before the torrent of many, his hand was followed by the others.

Sakura placed a fake frown on her lips despite her internal relief. “Not a single person wants to attend Sunagakure? Gaara is going to be so disappointed.” And Kakashi, she thought to herself, when he realized he was about to gain twenty-seven new fugitives to care for. She could already imagine the Hokage’s slack jawed surprise when she showed up with them tomorrow.

Not a single voice responded, and Sakura grinned as she stood and dusted the forest floor from Sasuke’s oversized slacks. “Well, that’s settled then. We’ll leave first thing in the morning.”

“Morning?!” someone called out. “Why not now, before the sun sets?”

Sakura looked around as if she had only just noticed it was growing dark. The crickets of nighttime began to chirp, large amphibians exchanged mating calls, and some growling beast began its nightly prowl with a roar in the distance. “I think one more night will be good for you.” Just to remind them of their choices.

And with impeccable timing, something he always managed to seem to have, Sasuke emerged from the woods behind her. His red and purple eyes seemed to glow from the shadows as if he, too, were some nocturnal beast of the Shikkotsu Forest come to pay them a visit. He stalked forward like a panther until he stood beside her. Those who might have had anything to say grew wide-eyed and gasped at his arrival, not coming to recognize him even as he stared each of them down. His gaze flickered to the red-cloaked individual in the back whose hands he had decimated, and his eyes seemed to rest on him longer than the others.

“Did you find him?” Sakura asked the Uchiha and his eyes reluctantly slid to hers in the darkening woods. He dipped his chin in a silent nod before gesturing behind him with a tilt of his head. Slowly, as if moving at a much slower space, Rugo stepped out of the trees behind them. At his appearance, the voices around the campfire picked up once again and they mocked, belittling the man who had made promises of walking into the woods and not returning. One man even went as far as saying, “Should have been a man and gone through with it, Rugo. Mozai will kill you anyway—” but he stopped midsentence and began screaming. The rest of the group panicked, scattering like cockroaches away from the individual, trying to identify the source of his torment.

But as Sakura glance to her left and saw Sasuke’s Sharingan, she knew instantly that it was him, taking it upon himself to silence the man with a torturous genjutsu. After the screaming continued for longer than what made her comfortable, Sakura sent a pointed look to her teammate. The shrieking died after that, but Sasuke added for good measure, “Be quiet. All of you—before you piss me off.”

Rugo didn’t stop until he came within a few feet of Sakura, and even though she knew he couldn’t see her, he stopped and stared at her as if he could, as if by sheer will alone, he might be able to. Sakura held his unseeing eyes as she chewed her lip in thought about how she might be able to help him through this more, before he silently turned and headed back toward the fire, sitting alone and far away from the group. He looked morose, haggard, and was he barefoot?

“I’ll be right back,” she informed Sasuke who turned to follow her anyway. She thought of asking him to stay behind and keep watch over the group, but she thought better of it. She had informed them of their options. They were free to make a run for it…if they dared to.

“Where are you going?” came Sasuke’s peeved, clipped question once they were out of earshot. She rolled her eyes even as her medical mind whirred and calculated. Despite the gloom and perilous nature of The Shikkotsu Forest, it was also a goldmine, a plethora of hard-to-obtain plants and fauna that made Sakura’s eyes sparkle in delight. Now, some of these things were rather tricky to get your hands on, but it made them all the more tempting.

H. Perforatum, for example, a yellow-flowering shrub that grew tangled at the base of large trees, was highly sought after for its medical properties; Shikkotsu Forest supposedly had it in abundance but no one dared to face the Shikkotsu Forest just to get their hands on it. Unfortunately, the trees here also often oozed toxic, milky-white sap that blistered the skin on contact, which would make the extraction complicated. But Sakura didn’t tell Sasuke that as she circled several bushes like one of Kakashi’s scent hounds on the trail.

“I’m looking for a plant known to help with depression. I’d like to offer it to Rugo and see if it can be help to him.”

She didn’t see Sasuke’s blink of surprise, but she felt it in his silence. She knew he didn’t care enough about it to ask further. At least until she snatched her hand away from a tree just in time before a sizzling dewdrop of white fluid fell from a branch, narrowly missing her fingers. Sasuke frowned at her and she smiled innocently while moving on to the next tree.

“Leave it,” Sasuke said as he peered up at the trees with a newfound trepidation. “He’s fine now.”

But Sakura discounted his words, plowing on until she saw it: the blue-green leaves and the bright starshaped, yellow flower clusters that Sakura had been desperate to get her hands on since she formulated the plan of coming here. It would be revolutionary in its use with her Mental Health clinics. And as she bent to pluck them greedily, she glanced above her head to watch for falling sap, but was surprised to find the purple hand of Sasuke’s Susanoo stretched above her. He stood cross-armed and aloof beside her, acting as if he had little regard for her tasks, but Sakura smiled to herself as the arm of charka reached out from his body with the intent to protect her from searing drops overhead. Seeing him do so reminded her of simpler times during their Genin youth, when Sasuke’s attitude was abrasive, but his actions always spoke his true feelings.

“Was it his permanent vision loss that made him want to do it?” Sakura inquired as she loaded the pockets of Sasuke’s oversized pants with yellow flora. Katsuyu told me he was in danger of himself, and I couldn’t think of why else.” There were millions of Katsuyu divisions spread through the forest, keeping tabs on all of Sakura’s charges, and the slug who had come to transport Sasuke to Shikkotsu had told her of the situation after Sasuke had been swallowed.

“Hn.” Sasuke acknowledged as she shifted beside her and she nodded, understanding that Sasuke might not give any more details than that. Sakura wasn’t exactly sure what to expect from sending Sasuke, but she had hoped he would be able to handle the situation better than she might even though it was her expertise. Maybe it was an instinct, knowing that Sasuke might be the right person to talk to someone who had lost his vision. He had been able to convince him somehow, and for that she was grateful.

Sasuke surprised her again when he spoke lowly. “I’ve told him to come to the Leaf and he agreed.”

“They’ll all be coming to the Leaf,” she informed him, popping one of the yellow flowers into her mouth, tucking it into the inside of her cheek to ruminate. It was both simultaneously bitter and pleasant; sort of like drinking Black Tea. It would be better brewed like a tea, but chewing would have to suffice for now.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at her words. “And we’ll be taking the slug express back to Konoha, how, again, if you’re here? You left that part out.”

“Lady Tsunade is waiting for the signal. She’ll perform the summoning that will take us all back to the Leaf.”

“Hmph,” he smirked, not being able to hide his regard for her ability to thoroughly plan something out to this extent in the span of twenty-four hours.

Sakura may have been a medic, but she was a ninja first. She wasn’t a mastermind strategist like Shikamaru, but she could hold a candle to many team leaders of her generation. A small pang of regret filled Sakura’s chest at the thought. She would never have a rookie team of her own to lead because she had dedicated her life to medical science.

Knowing that she wouldn’t get the chance once they returned to the watching eyes and glaring scowls of their group, Sakura daringly stood up on her tiptoes and kissed an unexpecting Sasuke chastely on the cheek, before turning to return to the campsite. At his reddening expression and clearing of his throat, Sakura smiled innocently, those hands coming to rest behind her back as she leaned forward and tilted her head, a habit leftover from girlish youth. And maybe she was interpreting things, but the Susanoo didn’t disappear from above her head until they were well away from the deadly trees, and to Sakura, it was all she needed in return to know that Sasuke was expressing his own form of love back.

In the dead of night, when the detainees had all passed into sleep, Sasuke kept his eyes trained on them, making sure that their heartbeats and cadence of breath signified genuine sleep. To his surprise, it seemed no one had any indication or plans to run. Not that he cared in particular, but it still didn’t ease his uncertainty. He wondered what Sakura had offered them to get them to go along with their sentencing. Regardless of their snoring and dream-filled twitching—which could easily alert prey to their presence; he didn’t know how they could even sleep knowing where they were—Sasuke didn’t trust them. Despite Sakura’s assurances, Sasuke still watched them as if he were the predator of their fears. Maybe that’s why they slept so soundly, knowing Sasuke was there to keep watch over them. Maybe it gave them some sort of security knowing that the man who protected the ambitions of their target-turned-jailer was there to ensure everything went according to the kunoichi’s design. Maybe, subconsciously, they knew Sakura cared about what happened to them at the very least, and as a result Sasuke was forced to as well. Perhaps it was the same factor that made them all choose to return to Konoha with her.

From a non-poisonous, outstretched branch, Sasuke watched two interactions initiated by Sakura on the ground below him. First, and expected, Sakura sought out Rugo, offering him the yellow flowers, explaining in whispers how to get the most out of the medicinal properties it offered. Saskue narrowed his eyes at the man, whom Sasuke still didn’t quite care for, as Sakura crouched before him and placed a supportive hand on his shoulder. He couldn’t hear her or read her lips with his Sharingan because her back was turned to him, but Sasuke saw that Rugo only nodded in response to everything she said and asked and kept his respectable distance. Smart choice on his part with Sasuke present.

Her second stop in the crowd below, however, had Sasuke leaning forward, his right eye glowing red as he made out the conversation below.

“Toka,” Sakura was saying, cross-armed as she stared down at the man who was reclined against a tree toward the back of the crowd. Sasuke recalled the stranger’s identity when she said his name, recalling the visions of the man clinging to the girl Sasuke had stolen the vision from. “We need to discuss something.”

“I don’t plan on discussing anything with you,” he sneered back at her, rolling his head back to the side to pretend to sleep against the tree roots.

“Tabi is pregnant,” Sakura deadpanned, and Sasuke could tell by her posture that she had adopted the professional voice of the physician. Toka’s eyes shot open with disbelief and his mouth went slack. Even Sasuke’s stomach dropped a bit at the abrasive announcement, suddenly feeling more empathy about the situation considering the context of his and Sakura’s conversation last night. No man would want to learn of his partner’s pregnancy right before facing a prison sentence.

When Toka recovered from the shock, he glanced nervously around at the others to see if anyone might have heard them. Sasuke could barely discern the furious whisper on Toka’s lips in response: “Why the fuck would you say that out loud in front of these people? You don’t understand the gravity of what you could have just done.”

“Does this mean you care about them, then? About Tabi and the baby?” she probed, unphased by his alarm. Sasuke wondered if Sakura did exactly what had triggered him just to assess his reaction.

“Why does it matter to you?” he asked angrily in a murmur, still trying to keep his words private between them.

Sakura turned her head in Sasuke’s direction unconsciously, and Sasuke’s eyes met hers, and she instantly looked away having realized what she’d done. And Sasuke frowned, because suddenly the conversation between his pink-haired teammate and the man sitting before her took on a new and uncomfortable context. Sasuke suddenly felt as if this were a personal topic for Sakura and she was asking from experience. As if she was hoping Toka would say yes, that he didcare. That he would do anything to go back to the mother of his child and make their family whole. To stop his foolish conquests and ambitions and be the man they needed him to be. Sasuke felt himself go rigid as he waited for Sakura’s response.

“Because Tabi told me you were different. I’m hoping that’s true.”

“I would only bring them heartbreak and pain. They’re better off without me.” Sasuke winced as the words that could have been his own landed directly as a blow to his chest.

And then Sasuke knew. He knew Toka was not the only intended recipient for her next words. “They’ll be in more pain to know you had a choice and your choice wasn’t them. All because you thought you knew best. Because you thought you didn’t deserve them.” It may have been Toka’s first time hearing such words, but for Sasuke, it was another echoing reminder.

He only stared at Sakura’s feet, and so she said, “I thought it might change your decision to come to Konoha. I’ve said that I won’t stop anyone from running if they want to risk the forest. Someone with a family waiting for them on the other side might just be brave enough to make it.” There was no response as she walked away from him, surveying the group one last time before making her way to the teammate she knew observed her every step from above.

And when she came to settle in the treetop beside him, Sasuke couldn’t meet her eye. For the longest minute of his life, he held his breath as her gaze settled on to him. Slowly and with fearful anticipation, Sasuke glanced at her to find that Sakura had merely propped her back against the trunk where the branch met the tree and had closed her eyes to sleep. Sasuke wanted to reach for her, tug her against his chest as he had last night in a different environment of darkness. He wanted to tell her that he was sorry. To tell her that she was his choice because he was hers. But a family…it couldn’t be his choice right now. Not when he knew what was coming for them. Sasuke’s choice would always have to be his mission, but he prayed to whatever sentient being looked down on them, that he would find the Otsusuki race, eradicate them quickly, and get back to his life with his wife.

Sasuke stared openly at her as she slept and he knew her decision to do so was to not force an uncomfortable conversation on him in the moment. Not after the trauma of the day. Not after witnessing a man attempt suicide and the conversation that followed, or from overhearing her discussion about families and choices with Toka. The day had been full of discomfort, and Sakura understood the Uchiha enough to know that now was not the time to have another. It was an indescribable mercy. And why she made a damn good doctor and rising therapist.

And with this realization, Sasuke wondered when, in Sakura’s eyes, he had become like a patient with his own mental health needs as well. When did she start seeing him as someone who needed to heal instead of someone she needed to heal from?

And Sasuke thought back to pools of acid and black flames that never stopped burning. And he thought of Sakura, the star in the sky of his darkness who still eternally burned for him despite everything. And Sasuke wondered when exactly he had started to answer that burn with a fire of his own. Even if he were galaxies away, he would burn eternally for her, like the black flames of Amaterasu.

#ssfanfiction #approachingsun #naruto fanfiction #sakura hiden #sakura haruno #sakura uchiha #naruto shippuden #approaching sun #naruto #sasusaku #sasusakufanfiction

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thatswhatsushesaid · 9 months ago

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tagged (kinda) by @mingguangsword!

i lost my first draft of this post 😭 let's try again.

1. why did you choose your url? because i am weak for puns, and because i am actually su she. weepy yet defensive lestat de lioncourt at the end of s2 voice, i am him, he is me.

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them. a whole whack of them:

@dailyayao which is just daily screenshots and scans of jin guangyao from all versions of the mdzs canon

@yaozongzhupressoffice my neglected satire blog where i answer asks and reblog stuff in-character as yao-zongzhu. occasionally will make references to his entirely heterosexual feelings for his very good friend ouyang-zongzhu in the tags.

@itwasabeautifulwebbing my minthara baenre from baldur's gate 3 simping blog lol. it's also turning into a catch-all for various video game nonsense, tho i'm definitely not as active there as i am here.

@fakerashid same deal as above, just for armand from amc's interview with the vampire.

3. how long have you been on tumblr? i first joined back in 2011 with a different username back in the migration of the dragon age fandom from livejournal to tumblr, and have been kicking around in some form or another ever since.

4. do you have a queue tag? sure do! 'moling queue' because, as i said, i'm weak for puns.

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? originally this blog had a different username, and i started it with the intention of cross-posting very serious horror fiction thinkpieces from a wordpress site. obviously i stopped doing that and have been enjoying myself a lot more here since i stopped taking myself so seriously lmao.

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp? i don't understand the question, that's literally me, su-zongzhu. (please god recognize this is a joke)

7. why did you choose your header? i just think jgy and sms look very powerful and dapper together in that scene. 😌

8. what’s your post with the most notes? some unfortunate ides of march shitpost that broke containment within an hour, i have it muted and hope to never think about it again.

9. how many mutuals do you have? no idea. lots? lots and lots?

10. how many followers do you have? 1271 as of this morning.

11. how many people do you follow? apparently 400 on the nose

12. have you ever made a shitpost? absolutely not, i don't have a sense of humour or believe in laughter.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day? every time my attention wanders pretty much lmfao (despondent)

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? never!!!! 😬

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts? i ignore them.

16. do you like tag games? yes!

17. do you like ask games? "i love them, but i don't like chain asks" <- same hat

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? "probably ray" <- oh no oh dear 😬 i think if i qualify as tumblr famous (doubt.jpeg) then probably a bunch of my mutuals are, too.

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? i am boring and married so no.

20. what is the last song you listened to? this performance of the famous "flowing water" composition for the guqin.

21. what are you currently watching? nirvana in fire, and it's consumed my soul. mei changsu 👀...... /clenches my fist

22. sweet/ savoury/ spicy? "savory"! <- correct!!!

23. what is your current relationship status? "literally on my way to break up with someone T_T i'll be single in a few hours!!!" <- omg fennel!!??? um, as i said above, i'm married! no plans to divorce mr. sushesaid, he surprised me with flowers and takeout from my favourite indian restaurant yesterday because i was having a rough day.

24. what is your current obsession? jin guangyao. it's still jin guangyao. it's probably going to be jin guangyao this time next year too.

25. what are nine albums/ songs you've been listening to lately?

it's not an album, but basically all of the ensemble and solo performances by zi de guqin studio on youtube.

return to cookie mountain, tv on the radio

the wellermen's album of shanties and other arranged covers

the hades 2 videogame soundtrack

the baldur's gate 3 videogame soundtrack

the chain, fleetwood mac

all of the lyrical ballads from the kentucky route zero videogame soundtrack (are u noticing a pattern, because i am)

the haven videogame soundtrack

the assassin's creed valhalla videogame soundtrack

tagging: @ratheralark @holy--milk @carnivorous-horses-lover @sunriseverse @watertightvines @frodo-of-the-nine-fingers @confusion-and-more @occasionalinanity @varethinsilico @thepurplewombat @peacocksdance and anyone else who puts eyes on this thing and feels moved to complete it.

#tag memes #ray.txt #my original answers were so much funnier 😔 sigh

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dezmondmyles · 3 months ago

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Answered on Bsky, copy/pasting here

1. based off my original tumblr username. eventually changed it midway through the 2010s to what it is now to truly reflect my growing identity as a writer. that and everyone was already calling me by that so lmfao

2. keyboard. when i first started really getting into it tho, i wrote out the first drafts with pen and paper. this was before i had a personal laptop to write anything on

3. i guess really since middle school but i count 2011 as my official step into writing fanfic seriously

4. it was most assuredly a pokemon oc thing. got 1 annoying review from a notoriously obnoxious writer and i lost confidence in it and deleted it. it wasnt anything of note to begin with anyway

5. weird answer cause it’s like, i have multiple fics for one fandom. but then one long fic for one fandom that ive continously worked on.

6. bit of both?? i def have like, long term goals i want to hit story wise but i kinda meander before i get there. writing by the seat of my pants is what makes me a great roleplayer tho lol

7. well going off the last thing i updated on ao3 it was my fallout new vegas fic 🎲

8. i guess based on pure quantity, it would be #protocreed teehee (hey friends how ya doin 👋🏼 )

9. eherm, well, very obviously by quantity alone it’s #deslex 🧡

10. @cooldadmondmiles , @seventhstrife @fearsomejibblet @punkasshunter have been big inspos and cheerleaders for me 🧡

11. i legit could not pick one if i tried haha ive read so many it’d be hard to choose

12. all 3 are well and good but comments are always welcome 🧡

13. to huh? to whuh? i dont know what that means

14. well that is def the survivor’s guide both in terms of chapters and in how long it has taken me to get this far with it haha haha ha… ha…

15. what if they were both monsters in their own right and what if they were in love gosh could you imagine-

16. i better enjoy AUs if i wanna remotely write deslex lmfao

17. unrealistic dialogue. not even “he would NOT say that” but more so “no one ever in the world has ever spoken like that”. which i think is just a problem of not listening to real people have conversations that arent scripted

18. ideally i like having music but sometimes it does become distracting and i gotta shut it off so i can concentrate

19. third person past tense. tho i did have a short stint of trying to do present tense, and that got me all jumbled up for a while. sometimes i still slip into present without meaning to

20. rrromance i guess?? supernatural? sci-fi like elements?? all??

21. die like a man. but i will ask for a beta here and there when i feel really nervous about a chapter

22. por que no los dos?

23. erm well haha ya know…

24. the one or two where the comment leaver was recovering in the hospital and read my fic in the meantime lmfao

25. positive affirmation. and spite. lmao.

#kel talks #long post

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incorrectvld-quotes · 1 year ago

Note

11, 16, 25 (i have more but im at dinner so im doing it in batches fjskdjks)

Nothing excites me more than seeing you show up in my inbox. The pressure to do well is HIGH!

11. Link your three favorite fics right now. YOU JUST HAD TO PICK A HARD ONE TO START OFF!!! Bearing in mind my favorite fanfics change like the weather, HERE WE GO!

The Kennerya Trilogy: A complete three part series featuring a Love Bug AU, touch starved Keith, and platonic team Voltron.

through a glass darkly: A complete two part series containing the works point fingers and bladed threats. It's a Reverse Robins story with whump for Tim and Jason.

Thunderstorms: This is part of an incomplete 5 part series pack, but can be read standalone. It's a wolf shifter AU focusing on Tim and his integration into the Wayne pack.

16. How many fic ideas are you nurturing right now? Share one of them? Too many. If we break it down by fandom I have 2 for TGCF, 5ish for Voltron, and 1 crossover for Leverage and The Librarians.

Only God knows how many for Batfam and the DC Comics universe. I don't want to count them.

But because I am foolish and curious myself, I went and counted. In my phone's notes I have 46 Batfam/DC Comics ideas. I have roughly 20-30 more in my tumblr drafts which brings the count up to 66-76. Roughly. There are always the ones floating around in my head and in my notebooks.

Edit: There are 5 Six of Crows ideas I missed during the first count.

25. What fic do you wish you got more of a response on? Oh my goodness I'm so happy you asked! I spent far too long on When a Door Closes, Break Open a Window and was a bit disappointed it didn't get quite as much response as I'd hoped for. It wasn't my first attempt at writing grief, but it was my first try at giving the protagonist a loophole in healing (one where it might be beneficial or it might break him further).

Through Thick and Thin is a personal favorite of mine that I wish had a little more attention. It's a platonic Shiro and Allura story that catalogues their friendship through the years including hardships and successes.

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ephemeral-winter · 5 months ago

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the year in books

i had a pretty awful year so i spent most of my free time zoning the fuck out while looking at my phone. also i don't read on my phone and i only "count" physical books towards my reading list (which is maintained via the notes app on my phone; fuck goodreads) but i also read a number of scholarly works on 19th century american social history for work and in the midst of the worst of the awfulness i embarked on a project of rereading the longform fics that i imprinted on most as a teenager.

1. Crossroads of Twilight (WoT #10) by Robert Jordan - read the bulk of this in 2023 but as it was a library book I had to finish it before I moved out of that city in mid-January! WoT: what a concept!

2. Howards End by EM Forster (reread) - i was on a big rereading kick this year as we shall see and i had to return to howards end because last summer/fall i was in a huge george eliot phase and suddenly it seemed very clear to me just how much forster was thinking about middlemarch in writing howards end. but i had to reread it to check

3. A Marvelous Light by Freya Marske - my friend who has a much higher tolerance for booktok and related trends had been after me to read this for ages and i finally gave in. i don't care for m/m romance (sorry!!!) and the magic system described here was too much for me to conceptualize idk

4. The Maiden of All Our Desires by Peter Manseau - people love making me read books about nuns; my problem is that many of these are about germans nuns but i do english and french nuns :/ anyway this was pretty good and it was about a snowstorm and i read it during the snowstorm that happened when i moved!

5. Parallel Lives: Five Victorian Marriages by Phyllis Rose (reread) - extending my george eliot phase but mostly i went back to this because of the sheila heti/phyllis rose conversation in granta that came out in… february?

6. A Room with a View by EM Forster (reread) - have YOU faced an external situation bravely lately? i have not. i was at the start of my illness when i reread this so i just read it for comfort more than anything

7.Excellent Women by Barbara Pym (reread) - a pretty good emergency room read, if you can believe it!

8. Enter the Aardvark by Jessica Anthony (reread) - i had to go to DC for a work trip; found myself still grappling with the emotional weight of losing roe; you know how it is

9. Aftermath: Life in the Fallout of the Third Reich, 1945-1955 by Harald Jahner - translated from the german and so was really interesting for me as someone whose knowledge of germany 1933-1945 is entirely dictated by american and israeli authors and as someone who really knew nothing about the postwar years in europe!

10. Possession by AS Byatt - the start of as byatt summer!!!! when i was in undergrad a pulitzer-prize winning novelist whose creative writing class i was taking read my draft and asked why i did so much perspective shifting and i said i just really like that in historical novels and she said oh you must love possession and i said that i hadn't been able to get into at 16 so i actually hadn't read it. and i've felt a little ashamed of that for several years. but it turns out the summer when you are 25 and have done too much/not enough grad school is the right time to be bowled the fuck over by possession!!!! more proof that you must let Great Literature come to you at the Right Time

11. The Vanished Child by Sarah Smith (reread) - was thinking a lot about late 19th century boston for work and also i had forgotten the solution to the mystery, so

12. The Dud Avocado by Elaine Dundy (reread) - a good poolside read. i remembered this as a book about summer but it's more about the golden feeling of being on your own in a foreign country in your early twenties, which is i guess the same thing

13. Laid and Confused by Marie Yagoda - well why aren't i having more sex, good or not? the answer is as always 1) immaturity as regards communication on the part of my partners and myself and 2) Phones tm. i didn't need to read this poorly written popular non fiction book to know that

14. Long Island by Colm Toibin - a great poolside read! a book about summer for sure

15. The Possessions of a Lady by Jonathan Gash - needed a paperback for being at the beach. despite being billed as light and frivolous, british slang in the lovejoy mysteries is so potent i have to read every sentence very slowly

16. The Dictionary of Lost Words by Pip William - made me so sad about not being in redacted i couldn't read more than a chapter a week for much of the year, alas. if i look too hard at the endpaper maps i cry. kind of a shit novel. i will NOT be reading babel instead, thanks so much

17. [redacted] by [redacted] - my boss gave me a copy of his self-published memoir in like february and i finally had to read it to get brownie points at work. bleh

18. Still Life by AS Byatt - i accidentally started reading the frederica quartet out of order and this is the second one, where she is mostly a confused liberated woman undergrad at cambridge and wow thank god i did not know about this book when i was an insufferable 22/23 year old at redacted. you ever feel a little too seen? also just yesterday i started lucky jim and huh byatt really was doing lucky jim but for women. we love feminism

19. Sorrow and Bliss by Meg Mason - i think this is a book about bipolar girlies? it was a fine novel but mostly forgettable imo

20. Intermezzo by Sally Rooney - i love pretending that i've read all of ulysses when i actually only read a hundred or so pages and then got bored. i do go to a bloomsday reading every year though. rooney's inability to maintain the joycean patter in all of peter's sections was like that. i did make it all the way through this one though and i'll probably appreciate revisiting it when/if i'm actually in love. not enough real angst, which is why conversations with friends is still my top rooney as it has the capacity to put me in a bad mood for at least two weeks at a time.

21. The Judas Goat by Robert B. Parker - was pretty ill and also my grandmother died so light mystery reread it is! j'adore spenser.

22. The Virgin in the Garden by AS Byatt - as byatt summer is forever!!!! the first of the frederica quartet - again, very good i did not know about this book when i was 17. you ever feel a little too seen?

23. Valediction by Robert Parker - more spenser. my mother thinks i've read all of them but i haven't, oops. i like it when he loves susan more because she's a harvard girl - it gives one hope.

24. Paper Doll by Robert B. Parker - more spenser as substitute for grieving!

25. Penance by Eliza Clark - i don't like true crime AT ALL so that was quite tough but she did a really really good job of capturing the epic highs and lows of being a fifteen or sixteen year old girl on tumblr in the year of our lord 2014. holy shit.

26. Live Alone and Like It by Marjorie H. Roulston - as a woman living alone for almost a year now i thought i'd try to learn something more about my predecessors (women in NYC boarding houses in the 30s). wow men trying to get in your pants are the same in every era.

#i do like talking to myself on my blog #anyway what should i read in 2025 #finishing the frederica quartet for sure #rare pic of me in the wild

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fierycavalier · 8 months ago

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25 Questions

Tagged by the bestie @what-breaks-my-heart

1. Why did you choose your url?

My url describes me! I came up with it while watching Whiskey Cavalier, a short-lived show from 2019 that I very much enjoyed.

2. Any sideblogs? If you have them, name them and why you have them.

Yes. I have one that's for more personal posts, although I go through phases using it. There's a 2nd one that I don't really use.

3. How long have you been on Tumblr?

I remember my first post was about how I'd just been accepted to my university, so it was spring of 2010. I remade my blog in 2015, though.

4. Do you have a queue tag?

Nope!

5. Why did you start your blog in the first place?

I'd used another blogging site but didn't like the format, so I switched to tumblr. It was purely personal posts to start, I didn't really join any fandoms until 2011 (thanks @magnetocerebro !)

6. Why did you choose your avatar?

It was the last time I took a selfie that I liked without caveat.

7. Why did you choose your header?

Ace's expression and the quote really vibed with my ongoing wrestle with grief and nostalgia.

8. What's your post with the most notes?

This one of my cats! I blazed it because my boys are cuties.

You can check yours here.

9. How many mutuals do you have?

42, the Answer to the Ultimate Question, so a pretty great number if I do say so myself

10. How many followers do you have?

263.

11. How many blogs do you follow?

205.

12. Have you ever made a shitpost?

not... intentionally? the best shitposts are sincere imo

13. How often do you use Tumblr each day?

regularly. just assume that i'm here lol

14. Did you have a fight/argument with another blog once?

Another blog (and its friends) got mad at me but I blocked them all (10/10 recommend)

15. How do you feel about 'you need to reblog this' posts?

It's a great way to ruin a perfectly good post. As a rule, I won't reblog.

16. Do you like tag games?

I do! But they're a pain to do on the app, so I save them as drafts to do on desktop, and then forget to to do them :(

17. Do you like ask games?

Yes! Except the part where I can't remember anything about myself as soon as someone asks

18. Which of your mutuals do you think is Tumblr famous?

All my mutuals are famous in my heart.

19. Do you have a crush on a mutual?

If you allow for a wide interpretation of crush, then yes

20. What is the last song you listened to?

Down Bad by Ms. Swift

21. What are you currently watching?

I just finished episode 5.8 of Elementary!

22. Sweet/savory/spicy?

Savory first, then sweet to finish.

23. What is your current relationship status?

Super married.

24. What is your current obsession?

dramione fan fic & art <3

25. What are nine albums/songs you've been listening to lately?

TTPD (the anthology) - Taylor Swift Clancy - Twenty One Pilots Eastern Montana - George Winston GUTS - Olivia Rodrigo TIM - Avicii Found Heaven - Conan Gray five seconds flat - Lizzie McAlpine Infinity On High - Fall Out Boy Tourist History - Two Door Cinema Club

tag you're it @florida3exclamationpoints @magnetocerebro @holliano @thankyouforyourcooperation @themarydragon @oceanodedoces @constantvigilante @goyurim

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angst-in-space · 2 years ago

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july ‘23 writing progress

words written: 18.3k

most words written in a day: 1.8k

least words written in a day: 26

current yearly total: 103.8k

projects worked on:

- ya sci-fi book revisions - sylvix pacific rim au - matchablossom bed-sharing fic - altea rising ch 15 edits (AND I POSTED IT....AT LONG LAST...) - posted ch 9 of sylvix dreamscape fic - short story planning

works published in july:

you’re a dream (i’m never waking up) - chapter 9 (fe3h/sylvix) altea rising - chapter 15 (vld/klance)

july goals:

- write 30k for camp nano - rewrite 4-5 chapters of ya sci-fi book (up to ch 20-ish?) - post ch 9 of sylvix dreamscape fic - start editing ch 10 of dreamscape fic - start editing chs 3-4 of renga fic? - continue first draft of arctic monster book - work on various fics (sylvix pacrim, kazurei post-canon, matchablossom, red skies ch 8, etc.)

august goals:

- continue ya sci-fi book rewrites... erm... i’m way behind schedule but maybe will try to aim for like chapter 25 or so - edit/post another chapter of altea rising - finish sylvix dreamscape ch 10 edits and send to betas - continue editing renga fic if i have time?? - work on other misc fics - maybe... work a bit on arctic monster book?? - write and submit short story

notes:

well.... this was an interesting month! because technically, in terms of word count, this was my most productive month of the year so far—but in terms of what i actually wanted to get done... well, not quite as successful LOL. but uhhh progress is progress, amiright?

i had hoped to write 30k this month and got to almost 19k so, missed my goal by about 11k lol (but still!! most words i’ve written in a month so far this year!).

i’d been hoping mainly to focus on book rewrites and get to chapter 20 or so but uhh... that did not happen either! i got Very Stuck on chapter 16 in particular so that took me most of the month. but i at least go through that and have almost finished chapter 17 as well! buuut i’ll have to rewrite... a lot more chapters this month if i want to stay on track to reach my self-appointed deadline. plus i’m having a lot of crises about my book in general lmao but guess that is all part of the process haha *gives a thumbs-up while tears roll down my face* ANYWAY. aiming for chapter 25 by the end of this month (and i’m trying to kick my own ass into rewriting like 1k words a day) so uhhh yeah. chuckles nervously.

in more positive news, i updated two whole fics in july after months of posting nothing so WOOOO!!! chapter 9 of sylvix dreamscape fic is finally posted after like 9 months, and chapter 15 of altea rising is posted after uhhh like 4.5 years lmao. with the latter, it’s been especially touching to see people so excited for it and that you were happy to see it update! honestly i had a LOT of anxiety about continuing to post it because i worried no one would care anymore, so it means a lot. :’) i definitely hope to keep working on both those fics and aim to update at least one of them by end of august!

i also planned out a short story that i’m hoping to write and submit to an anthology this month so *sweats* pray for me....i have not written a short story in ages, much less submitted short fiction anywhere lol but it’s something i’ve meant to try for a while!!

otherwise, i’m not sure i’ll have time for much else because this month is going to be pretty busy for me on top of all the writing-related stuff i need to do. but hoping to maybe squeeze in some progress on other fics when i can (or when i’m feeling burned out on my book). sooo yeah i think that’s all for now!!

#brigidposts #writing updates #monthly writing updates 2023 #fanfic #original fic #text

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jonbenetrunsolved · 2 months ago

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G. Epstein Handwriting expert.

THE VIDEOGRAPHER: 10:13 a.m. 15 (Recess). 16 THE VIDEOGRAPHER: Back on the 17 record at 10:26 a.m. 18 BY MR. RAWLS: 19 Q. Mr. Epstein, we have a book here 20 that I'll show you, let me put it in the way 21 of the camera for just a moment, and, for the 22 record, this book was spoken of by Ms. Cina 23 Wong earlier this week. 24 Do you understand that Ms. Wong is 25 your co-expert on handwriting in the case of 0032 1 Chris Wolf? Was that a smile captured just 2 then or an effort not to smile? 3 A. An effort not to smile. I don't 4 know what you mean by co- -- what was it you 5 said? 6 Q. My word was co-expert on handwriting 7 in the case of Chris Wolf. 8 A. I really don't know how to answer 9 that question, to tell you the truth, because I 10 was not aware until this morning on my way here 11 that she had, in fact, been deposed and that 12 she had, in fact, written another report. 13 MR. HOFFMAN: Jim, can I interject 14 here, because this is a thing that involves 15 counsel and you can put this on the record or 16 keep it off, whichever you like. 17 MR. RAWLS: Well, Darnay, first I'd 18 like for Mr. Epstein to finish his answer. I 19 didn't think he was finished, but he might have 20 been. 21 MR. HOFFMAN: I'm very sorry. 22 Q. Mr. Epstein. 23 A. I don't consider her as my co-expert 24 in this case. 25 Q. Why is that? 0033 1 A. Someone else may consider her as a 2 co-expert in this case, but I don't. 3 Q. Why? 4 A. Because I don't believe that she 5 meets what I and the profession consider to be 6 the necessary qualifications for forensic 7 document examination.

More from Epsteinn's deposition proving he and Ziegler were hired to come to the same conclusion.

Larry Zieglar saw my report before I 21 saw his report and he probably borrowed that 22 sentence. We were asked -- we were asked the 23 same questions. We were asked to establish the 24 same thing. 25 After I had done my draft report, I 0123 1 know I showed it to Larry, he showed me his, 2 and now that that's in there I know that I 3 didn't take it from him, so if it's the same 4 sentence then he must have taken it from mine 5 because I didn't take it from his report. 6 Q. And would I be correct in stating 7 this as fact, Mr. Epstein: Before you finalized 8 your 2001 report to Mr. Hoffman you showed it 9 to Larry Zieglar; is that true? 10 A. After I had done my examination, 11 yes. 12 Q. And before Larry Zieglar finalized 13 his 2001 report, which is Defendant's Exhibit 7, 14 he shared it with you. 15 A. That's correct. 16 Q. And at least one of you borrowed 17 language of the other. 18 A. It appears to be. But I can tell 19 you that I did not borrow his language, so 20 therefore he must have borrowed mine.

Q. -- what documents had you examined 13 with reference to this case at that time? 14 A. I examined the copies of the ransom 15 note and I examined some normal course of 16 business standards of Patsy Ramsey. 17 Q. What ones in particular? 18 A. Could I refer to my notes? 19 Q. Please. 20 A. I examined a copy of a three-page 21 handprinted ransom note, and then as far as the 22 standards there was a copy of a two-page letter 23 dated Wednesday, June 4th that was signed, 24 "Fondly, Patsy and JonBenet." 25 I examined a copy of the inside of 0078 1 a greeting card with the entry starting, "Hi, 2 Bob," and additional writing. 3 I examined a color copy of a 4 hand-printed sign. I examined some color copy 5 of package wrappers with the name Ramsey and 6 Ramsey Christmas written on it. 7 I examined a copy of a color 8 photograph with the writing Rainbow Fish Players. 9 I examined a copy of a photo album 10 pages with hand-printed entries, copy of an 11 ornamental circle with some handwriting in there. 12 I examined a two-page document which 13 was a copy of an entry form for the 1996 14 Lights of December parade bearing the known 15 handwriting of -- attributed to Patsy Ramsey. 16 Q. From whom had you received those 17 documents? 18 A. Those documents originally I received 19 from Larry Zieglar. 20 Q. What steps did you take to confirm 21 the authenticity of those documents and the fact 22 that they originated from the hand of Patsy 23 Ramsey at that time? 24 A. They were submitted to Larry Zieglar 25 as known writings, and I accepted them as known 0079 1 writings. 2 Q. You did not independently seek to 3 verify that they were known writings of Patsy 4 Ramsey. 5 A. I did not. 6 Q. By whom had Mr. Zieglar been hired, 7 if by anyone, to your knowledge? 8 A. By Mr. Darnay Hoffman. 9 Q. He disclosed that to you at the 10 outset. 11 A. Disclosed what? 12 Q. Mr. Zieglar disclosed to you that he 13 had been hired by Darnay Hoffman. 14 A. Yes.

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littlemissmedicalmalpractice · 10 months ago

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looking in my drafts and i found this half completed :''') sorry this is so late but thank u sm for the tag :D!!!

nine albums or songs I've been listening to lately x nine people I’d like to get to know better x tag game with no name

1. why did you choose your url? it's based on ieiri shoko from jujutsu kaisen :D (especially her in jjk 261.ajkhafks) though it's not super connected to her so i'd also say it's just cause i like it lol

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them. @tibia-soup for tgcf and tlt, @sashisusupremacy for silly sideblog things, @a-nice-place which is shared for happy things :)

3. how long have you been on tumblr? i've been lurking anonymously on tumblr longer than i've been alive lol. um...i've probably had an account since 2019 or 2020, though i've made a lot of new ones and deleted far more than i've needed to :')

4. do you have a queue tag? i'm not nearly organized enough for that

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? mcu reader fanfiction...don't murder me please!!!

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp? it's a beautiful ferret from this post to match with some mutuals <3

7. why did you choose your header? it's some very happy people who will never have anything bad happened to them ever 😇

8. what’s your post with the most notes? hm idk, i don't make a lot of original posts. probably one of the jjk haikus i wrote

9. how many mutuals do you have? mutuals that i actually interact with? around a dozen or twenty. mutuals that have been in the trenches with me through fandom wars but i've never spoken to? probably another twenty

10. how many followers do you have? 74 plus a handful of bots :)

11. how many people do you follow? 455 wonderful magical people

12. have you ever made a shitpost? have i every NOT made a shitpost is a better question 😎 (yes i have, got a whole blog for them)

13. how often do you use tumblr each day? very sporadically...sort of one day i'll be on it for hours on end but another day i'll only go on for five or ten minutes

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? i got very mad at a blog for insulting a book that i liked and i complained aggressively to my friend but i didn't say anything. i sort of get in a fight with someone being mean in the notes of my friend's post but after a couple replies i just blocked them

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts depends if they're joking or not. not my favorite type of post definitely

16. do you like tag games? yes!!! i'm bad at doing them bc procrastination 😌(edit this is even funnier now that i'm picking it up again) but they're fun to get to know people :)

17. do you like ask games? yeah :D, same thing as tag games

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? probably @godmodebeginswithlesbians though im not sure if we're technically mutuals...big blogs are intimidating to interact with :')

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? no but i think they're all so cool 👍❤️

20. what is the last song you listened to? 1234 by feist, it's on this old cd playlist my sister gave me

21. what are you currently watching? banana fish (rewatching...send prayers lol) and haikyuu (also rewatching!!! because watching olympics volleyball inspire me)

22. sweet/ savoury/ spicy? spicy!!!

23. what is your current relationship status? single and uninterested 👍 (aro)

24. what is your current obsession? FENGLIAN, a ship from tgcf....their dynamic is rotating in my brain so fast and all i can coherently think is the word angstangstangstangstangst

25. what are nine albums/ songs you've been listening to lately?

this is just my current playlist (minus a couple songs) lol, cause i almost never full albums :3

1234 by feist, same as before :)

psycho by kaiyi

superstar by lauryn hill

i hate texas by mxmtoon, which she just released!!!

notes in the stars by laura sherwin

mama's pearl by the jackson 5 (it's STUCK in my head send help)

your best american girl by mitski

csikós post by hermann necke

golden by jill scott

26. tagging (no pressure <3) @shrimpathizer @rumplestiltsbear @wolfspero @falcon-forest @checkeredcookie05 @mingguangsword @f1shpotatoes @fire-in-my-eyes @tea-loving-introvert and @ anyone else who's interested :D

nine albums or songs I've been listening to lately x nine people I’d like to get to know better x tag game with no name

(thank you for the tag @lianhuajing !!)

1. why did you choose your url? uh. it was a play on "rose tinted glasses"

2. any sideblogs? if you have them name them and why you have them. nope!

3. how long have you been on tumblr? I think 2022? i knew about it before, just never bothered to make a blog

4. do you have a queue tag? don't kill me, what's a queue tag?

5. why did you start your blog in the first place? I had some Thoughts about Blue Lock and wanted to post meta for it

6. why did you choose your icon/pfp? uhh Flora.

7. why did you choose your header? Reo is one of my Blorbos and I just really liked that panel of him

8. what’s your post with the most notes? probably the "do you download fics" poll

9. how many mutuals do you have? about 20? i don't remember

10. how many followers do you have? 120?

11. how many people do you follow? 91

12. have you ever made a shitpost? yes. i think.

13. how often do you use tumblr each day? an hour?

14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? nope

15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts meh. some of them are funny i guess

16. do you like tag games? yep! it's nice interaction

17. do you like ask games? i do! but uh. it's a silent empty void here. an echo chamber, if you will.

18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous? i have no idea but i see @kingsandbastardz a lot in the mlc community

19. do you have a crush on a mutual? nope

20. what is the last song you listened to? 若梦 by 周深

21. what are you currently watching? i just finished The Double! probably starting on Dashing Youth next

22. sweet/ savoury/ spicy? savoury!

23. what is your current relationship status? single

24. what is your current obsession? The Double,,,,

25. what are nine albums/ songs you've been listening to lately?

若梦 by 周深

如故 by 张碧晨

如初 by 张碧晨

借过一下 by 周深

万物不如你 by 张杰

Our dawn is hotter than day by Seventeen

Hitorijana by Seventeen

my music taste is kinda...i tend to stick to a few artists...

26. tagging (no obligation to do this!) @randomingoftherandomness @good-vs-evo @chrysofightme @bbcphile

#i'm terrible at doing tag games on time so hopefully this isn't *too* late

52 notes · View notes

anerdinallherglory · 2 years ago

Text

Approaching Sun (36)

Author’s Note: Hey again! Surprising you all with a new chapter a week apart. I had to cut the last one short and this one short as well, essentially dividing one chapter into three. This doesn’t mean the wordcount is short. This one comes in just under 10,000. But keep your eyes out for the next part. I also wanted to drop my linktree here: linktr.ee/anerdinallherglory so it’s easier to find all my info in one place. Please go and check it out! I am also looking for beta readers for my own personal novel. I’m even considering starting a newsletter or posting it back on Wattpad as a pre-published draft, but haven’t decided on that 100%. I will let you all know as soon as I decide. The tracks I recommend for this chapter: 1) Let Me Touch Your Fire by ARIZONA and 2) Daylight by Crypto/DEIIN. Thanks again for reading!

Pairing: SasuSaku

Previous Chapters: 1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35

Chapter 36: Demons

When Sasuke stepped into the brothel disguised as a bathhouse, an empty room greeted him. Not a single soul was in sight, and Sasuke wasn’t quite sure what he was expecting, but the place being deserted was the worst possible outcome. It meant no traces, no answers, and Sasuke dreaded finding Sakura’s trail end in this damned place. It also made his stomach knot at the thought that this might be what the room typically looked like on an average night considering the private and concealed activities that occurred in separate chambers.

Despite the absolute darkness, Sasuke could make out giant undisturbed baths beyond the reception counter, the water a still onyx glass as if the baths were only there to serve as a display, never to be used. And that’s probably exactly what they were: a lie to disguise the truth of what this place actually was. Only Sasuke’s Sharingan could make out the alcove, the inconspicuous hallway in the back that Sasuke crept toward in the shadows.

His visual abilities revealed the outline of the door at the end of it, where someone without visual prowess might find nothing but a wall. Sasuke placed his fingertips against it to push on the barricade, not detecting any sort of seal or rigging to prevent it from opening. Sasuke wasn’t surprised that there wasn’t considering this particular establishment housed regular citizens and not ninja. If ninja did inhabit the space, Sasuke figured that it was for a short, purposeful visit, not long-term residency. The door gave to his pressure and a faint light glowed through the opening as Sasuke silently slid the door until he had had hairline’s width to peer through.

A group of women were the first thing Sasuke noticed, all gathered in the middle of the floor, some holding candles in various states of distress. Muffled, crying sounds reached his ears and Sasuke naturally found the dimly-lit faces where the noises originated, paths of light-reflecting tears striping their painted faces. There were also lavish styled chairs scattered throughout the room, some tipped on their sides and others still erect in rows.

A gruff male voice interrupted the women’s soft, plea-filled weeping and Sasuke’s uncovered Sharingan eye instantly narrowed as he located three supervising figures that towered over the distressed girls. They stood just outside of the candlelight between Sasuke and the group they were terrorizing, their shadows passing in front of the light source which made it very easy for Sasuke to trace their movements, even without his Sharingan. Their mistake, Sasuke thought to himself, as the words became more substantial.

“There must be something else that she said,” hissed one man as he reached forward and fisted one of the older woman’s robes, yanking her forward from the group. The other girls screamed, clutching at the dangling woman and halting her movement forward. One girl was kicked down by the man because she dared to stand before him in an attempt to wrestle the woman from him. “You’re the Mother, aren’t you?!” he spat viscously in her face. “How could you make such a mistake? You let the enemy in, and you will pay for it!”

“We already told the last group of men here,” the woman gasped, tearing at the sleeve of the arm that held her in the air by her throat. “She’s gone to the Land of Fire’s border. That’s all we know. Please let me go.”

“Where?! Where at on the border?”

“We don’t know!” a fair-headed girl pleaded, crawling forward to the man’s feet to look up imploringly into his shadowed face. “That’s all she said after she took the men away.”

“There must be more,” another man spoke, coming forward to respond to the girl and glare up at the hanging woman, too.

Sasuke waited, dampening his eagerness to intervene. A situation such as this one was not typically one to cause any sort of reaction from Sasuke, but as his conscience had come back to him over the years after the Fourth Shinobi World War, these types of intimidation tactics on people who didn’t deserve it were the sort that pissed the Uchiha off in an unforgiving sort of way. But he couldn’t be too rash, considering the information he, too, was receiving from the exchange. Unfortunately, Sasuke was still the sort of person who would let that woman dangle for an eternity if it meant that he would get the answers he needed about Sakura’s actions and whereabouts. But at the same time, Sasuke was desperately hoping she knew nothing.

The woman choked, face purpling. She was beyond being able to speak now, her body no longer receiving the oxygen to use words, so the girls huddled on the floor made implorations on her behalf.

“Stop this! You’re killing her!”

“Give me more information and she we will live!” the man shouted down at them. “Or stay silent and she dies!”

Another minute of silent crying had Sasuke’s hand itching toward the door, not certain how much information there was left to learn. Their tactic worked as intended, however, and Sasuke stilled himself once more when a dark-haired girl shuffled forward on her knees, barely old enough to be considered a mature adult. With beseeching hand movements, she disclosed, “I’ll tell you everything. Just let her go.”

“Talk first!” snarled the offender, shaking the matron for good measure.

“All I know is that she dyed her hair after arriving. She’s in disguise,” she confessed with a shaky voice.

Finally receiving a scrap of intelligence, the man threw the matron toward the group of girls and there was more shrieking as she landed roughly among them, and their hands all scrabbled in unison to catch and break her fall. The matron coughed violently as color began to return to her face.

“And?” the man enticed the young girl to continue, leaning down to fist her dressing gown next.

The young girl returned his gaze with a fire that wasn’t there before. Now that she had replaced the matron’s spot in the face of the zealot, she laced her next words with venom. “And,” she murmured. “She’s going to kill every single one of you bastards.”

There was a loud strike against flesh, but the sound was infinitesimal compared to the crack of lightning that suddenly struck and shook the ceiling above them. Everyone fell to the ground at the sound, covering their ears and crawling toward one another instinctively. Even the three men crouched in surprise, but they were the first to recover, casting their eyes about wildly.

As the three extremists turned to assess the room’s entrance, the door that separated them from the Uchiha was now fully open, the darkness of the hallway consuming all of Sasuke’s person except for his unconcealed blood red eye. When he stepped into the room, the three ninja prepared themselves to face the new threat, which was a mistake, because all three of them locked eyes with red and purple.

Without a second of passing time, the three men fell back to their knees and their screams were positively delicious sounds as they succumbed to the horrors Sasuke had planned for them in his genjutsu. They would suffer and the chakra it cost the Uchiha to do it was worth it based on their screaming alone.

The girls scrambled to collect the candles they had dropped out of fear when the lightning had struck, each of them desperate to claim some light to reveal what monster had just stepped into the room with them. When the youngest girl successfully secured one, she brought it to her face only to reveal Sasuke’s dark outline standing before her. When she looked up into his Sharingan, she dropped the candle once more.

“The devil,” she whispered, speaking the word as if doing so had sealed her fate. “He’s finally come for me.”

Panicked gasps, crying, and prayers fabricated into existence around Sasuke as the other girls beheld the apparition of him for themselves, a phantom of black and red and purple delivering punishment to the three begging men now behind him.

Sasuke crouched before the young, dark-haired girl, the very one who had revealed information about Sakura to the three anti-peace members, all of whom would soon not be able to remember anything but Sasuke’s katana as it penetrated their bodies over and over. How fitting a description, Sasuke thought to himself as he remembered Itachi, whom the genjutsu he now used was modeled after, how devil-like the Uchiha clan became when they were set on protecting something they cared about.

“Not for any of you,” Sasuke responded coldly, wasting no time to reach for her terrified face over the flickering circumference of the discarded candlelight between their bodies. When he clutched her chin between his fingers, her eyes widened in fear, which was positively advantageous for the Uchiha as he peered through them to search her memories.

Sasuke moved through this girl’s memories just like the phantom she imagined him to be, gliding through the very sins she committed tonight until he saw the scene he was looking for: Sakura’s face coming into view as she entered into the dark room in which this girl and a man were coupled on a lounge, both still wet from the bath. They were wrapped in one another’s arms, exchanging sweet whispers to each other in the dark.

Sakura seemed surprised by this fact, as if she hadn’t expected to find them nestling into one another there. Sasuke watched his teammate hesitate for just a moment until a needle sank into the man’s flesh. The girl from whose eyes Sasuke watched his former teammate, gasped at the sudden attack. Untangling himself, the man swung in Sakura’s direction. “You,” he had hissed. “You’re—” he began before falling to the floor lifelessly, incapacitated by the drug that Sakura had injected him with.

Sakura stared down at him for a moment, eyes flashing back toward the girl, before she reached down to flip over the man’s body, so that he could breathe freely.

Sasuke couldn’t focus on anything other than the raven black of Sakura’s tinted hair. A small part of his heart wanted to linger on the scene, imagine a child with Sakura’s features and Sasuke’s hair. He fisted the emotions and shoved them back, resuming the memory.

“Hae, what are you doing!?” screamed the girl, scrambling from the lounge onto the floor beside the man.

“I am sorry, Tabi.” Sakura whispered, biting into her thumb and performing a summoning jutsu that Sasuke was too familiar with. Katsuyu, Sakura and the Fifth Hokage’s summoning familiar, materialized into existence on the spot on the floor where Sakura had pressed her five-fingered seal. To Tabi’s extreme horror, the slug, human-sized, began to encapsulate the man she desperately tried to shield away from the creature. But her hands disappeared into the mucusy flesh of the gastropod, failing to gain any purchase.

“Who are you?! Why are you doing this?” she cried, backing speedily away when the creature began to absorb her hands as well.

“There’s not much time to explain,” Sakura replied, coming to bend down before the girl. Sakura knelt before the girl, revealing a small canvas bundle of small bottles, needles, and medicines. “I’m not really in this business as I made all of you believe. I’m a doctor and I only have a few minutes to help you.”

When Tabi said nothing else, just stared at Sakura in confusion, she asked carefully, “Do you suspect that you’re pregnant?”

Tabi’s mouth fell open at the revelation and her hands moved to her stomach at the mention of pregnancy. The tears that began to fall from her face was confirmation enough for the medic. She asked her next question. “Do you want to keep it?”

“What?” Tabi asked, wondering how the woman before her could have suspected something Tabi only was beginning to experience the symptoms of.

“Do you want this baby? There are ways to—”

“Yes, I want it!” Tabi cried, hugging herself and flinching away from the unrolled canvas parcel of vials as she began to see the collection in a new light. “The baby is mine and—” she protested, turning back to the man who was now completely encased by the slug. “What are you doing to him?!”

Sakura’s eyes flicked over to the man and only Sasuke was able to recognize the regret in them. “He’s one of the members of Zenshin,” Sakura informed the distraught girl. “It’s my mission to eradicate the organization.”

“Please,” Tabi begged, grasping Sakura’s arms with her hands, stilling them over the bag of medical supplies. “You can’t take him. He’s different from the others. We love each other.”

Sasuke saw Sakura chew her lip in thought, rerolling the canvas bag into a tight parcel. He instantly knew Sakura was thinking of him, his face flashing in her mind as she faced Tabi. The confliction there let Sasuke know exactly what she was thinking. Just as Sakura so desperately wanted her own happy ending, she also wanted Tabi to have hers. But her eyes hardened, and she removed her arms from Tabi’s hands. In that very same instant, the slug dematerialized into nothing, taking the man with her to wherever the slug disappeared to.

“If Toka loves you, he will come back to you once I am finished with him,” Sakura divulged, looking pointedly at her stomach. “Does he know?”

Tabi shook her head, more tears streaming down her face. “I was going to tell him once he left them. He was going to do it soon—run away with me.”

Sakura nodded and shoved the canvas bundle into Tabi’s shaking hands. “Give these to the other girls and have them follow the directions inside. I don’t know how well you guys are taking care of yourselves here, but there are medicines in here. To prevent pregnancy— and to protect yourselves from diseases. As a medic, I can’t leave here without doing at least this.”

Sasuke flinched at the scene before him, knowing that Sakura had carried that on her person, probably having prepared it in advance for this very mission in this damn brothel, intended for her own personal use. Sasuke had never been so close to wanting to vomit in his life. He wanted to reach through this memory and grab her arm and force her to explain all of this to him. Why would she take such risks for a mission—abuse herself in this way?

“Where are you going?” Tabi beseeched, focused more on the fact that this parting gift meant Sakura’s immediate intentions to depart along with the man she loved.

“The border of the Land of Fire,” Sakura responded without hesitation as she met Tabi’s gaze with hers. “You can tell that to whoever comes asking questions,” the woman who Tabi had believed was named Hae added. “It’s the truth and it’s not a secret. Let them come.”

Sasuke closed his eyes at the intentional crumb she had left for the enemy. She had probably told every girl who had asked this information the same response. It was obvious that she was luring whoever was left of the organization out of Tanigakure. They had more of a personal vendetta against her now after her actions tonight and would definitely pursue, especially since they believed she was acting alone. It would be perfect for them, to eliminate their Number 1 and get revenge in the same motion. The temptation to chase would be too great.

As Sakura stood and headed back for the door, she turned back to Tabi, who was still kneeling on the ground and clutching the bundle of medications to her stomach, shielding the small flutter of life that had started there.

When Sakura’s eyes met Tabi’s, Sasuke suddenly felt as if Sakura were looking beyond them, into the memory itself until her eyes met Sasuke’s within. “In case you’re watching this, I can handle this alone. I don’t need your help.” Sasuke felt Tabi’s confusion as the girl failed to comprehend Sakura’s last words. Sasuke, however, knew exactly who those words were for: the Uchiha, himself. So, she knew. Sakura had known that he was here in Tanigakure searching for her. She had predicted that he would track her to this place and perform this very jutsu.

When Sakura closed the door behind her, leaving Tabi to sob uncontrollably to herself, Sasuke rewound the memory further, past the indecencies between the girl and the man called Toka, until he was watching the same man spin Sakura in front of a crowd of lust-hungry brutes. Sasuke froze the scene before him, eyes narrowing as he memorized each of their faces. One man came forward and grabbed Sakura, pulling her into his lap. His eyes were tightly bound, and the blind stranger leaned his mouth against Sakura’s ear in the dimly lit room. To Sasuke’s extreme dissatisfaction, Tabi had not heard, and therefore Sasuke could not decipher what the man had whispered in his teammate’s ear. Sasuke was beyond disappointed to miss the very words that he would repeat to the man as the Uchiha eviscerated him. The memory of Sakura ended once more as Toka led Tabi away to their private room.

Thoroughly enraged at what he had just witnessed, Sasuke cursed to himself as he released the young woman’s chin. Tabi gasped when Sasuke retreated viciously from her mind, and she fell back on her wrists away from him. Sasuke’s crimson gaze fell on every girl who clustered in the darkness, gaping openly at him in terror, and he couldn’t help but picture Sakura in all of their faces. They, too, had been feasted upon by the eyes of despicable men, dragged into laps and so much more. In another life and in different set of circumstances, who knows if Sakura might have ended up trying to earn her living doing such a thing, too. He pitied every woman who had no other options. Sasuke would not consider himself a sentimental or feeling person. In fact, he wanted nothing more than to turn on his heel and vanish from the room in the same manner in which he had appeared, letting his fire-style impede the very building in which he stood. But he wavered, glancing down at the tiny swell of Tabi’s malnourished stomach. With his Rinnegan, Sasuke could see the tiny orb of light there. It pulsed like a tiny, throbbing sun.

Leaning fully into the devil character they believed him to be, Sasuke did something very much unlike himself. He took the time to say, “Leave this place and do not come back. Every single one of you.” He turned back down to Tabi once more and said, “Your child deserves a peaceful world. The next generation does not need to suffer for the sins of their parents.”

And then Sasuke, like a demon specter made of shadows, turned and vanished back into the blackness of a hellish night.

The downpour lasted long into the night and Sakura swore at her bad luck. Sakura had quickly snagged a set of clothing from one of the smaller ninja that she had rendered unconscious back at the bathhouse. Even still, the man’s clothes hung loosely on her thinner, angular frame and Sakura had apologized to the palm-sized version of Katsuyu that clung to Sakura’s skin at the slug’s initial repulsion to the smell of the stranger’s attire. Sakura hadn’t had time to find her original set of clothing once her mission had begun; the tight-fitting robes from the bathhouse had been insufficiently insulated, so Sakura had tugged on one of the radical’s dark pants, black jacket, and matching vest in the presence of one of the horrified girls without explanation as the girl watched Katuyu absorb another person and whisk them away. Strategically, Sakura had even adorned her forehead with the five-spiral headband tucked away in the man’s vest just in case it was slightly advantageous to do so. Sakura had only seen the forehead protector twice before, but more recently caught a glimpse of it in the desert when Mako was thrown the identical headband for successfully kidnapping her.

With her shadow-colored hair tucked hurriedly under the jacket’s stiff-fabric hood, Sakura pulled the shirt’s loose-fitting collar up and over her nose so that only her eyes and the headband were visible on her brow. She had hoped such a disguise would at least get her out of Tanigakure unnoticed in the night. Surprisingly enough, Tanigakure’s “peaceful” reputation and open access to travelers made it relatively easy for Sakura to locate a small mountain path that exited the village undetected. The kunoichi also allowed herself a moment of pride, because not being stopped also meant that she had been quick enough with the execution of her plan. She had handled any immediate threats back at the brothel, making it out before any other Zenshin members could discover the cookie crumb she had left behind for them to find.

It was dark, and the rain was merciless as Sakura skirted the side of the mountain, taking refuge from the rain in the dense tree cover that blanketed the landscape. The tree limbs bowed beneath the weight of her hurdles as she bounded from branch to branch, arms thrown behind her as she mercilessly raced toward the border between the Land of Rivers and Land of Fire. Once she had guided her likely pursuers into the Land of Fire, Sakura would be able to handle the rest of them as she pleased, as recklessly as she pleased. She would no longer have to worry about causing any catastrophes in Tanigakure that the Leaf or the Sand might have to take responsibility for.

She had expected a pursuit. Mako had told Sakura that there were Zenshin members all throughout the shinobi world—eventually, they would come for her, too—but the remaining Zenshin members in Tanigakure would be absolutely desperate to prevent her from reaching the border. But what Sakura had not expected was the speed in which some of them had caught up with her.

When Sakura had first picked up on the footfalls that those without the sharpened senses of a ninja wouldn’t be able to distinguish beyond the crashing rain against the canopy above, Sakura had immediately halted her movements in the branches. Tucking her body tightly into the bough of a tree, she contemplated her options as the voices began to near her. Considering that it took Sasuke and Sakura two days of leisure travel to reach Tanigakure from Konoha, Sakura was predicting that it would likely take her a fraction of that time to reach the border—which was located much closer to Tanigakure than the Leaf—at the speed in which she was travelling now. If her estimations were right, it would be essentially six hours, four of which had already transpired since her exit. Could she simply outrun them for another two hours?

Maybe the solution was something simpler, something E-Rank that Sakura hadn’t used since her Genin days. Sakura thought back to her interaction with the second man she had spoken with at the brothel, “the clown” of the group as Rugo had called him. Sakura’s initial target who had asked Sakura questions, investigating if she were “new, new.” Sakura focused on his features as she performed a transformation. The Transformation Jutsu had its flaws, which is why it wasn’t used too often, especially in the presence of experienced shinobi or those who could see chakra with a visual prowess like the Sharingan or Byakugan, or detect chakra signatures like the ninja, Karin. But a confrontation was going to be inevitable regardless of whether or not Sakura could fool them with a jutsu; she would just have to face them head on sooner than she had wanted. If it were the latter, then the jutsu possibly failing was a moot point, so there was no harm in crossing her fingers and going for it. The jutsu wouldn’t have to be flawless to be effective.

She could hardly assess them, the rain a thick sheet between herself and the enemy. There were three of them, all cloaked and protected from the elements. The low number made Sakura suspect that this was one of many search parties and their likelihood of finding her had less to do with their skill at tracking and more to do with fact that at least one group was going to guess her direction of travel correctly and encounter her by chance. She waited until they were practically under her perch to make her choice.

Without a second more of hesitation, Sakura dropped several feet in front of them, shouting in a voice that had thickened into that obnoxiously loud tenor from the brothel. “I think she went this way!” Sakura didn’t wait to hear a response as she darted forward into the night.

“Araki?!” came a woman’s voice as she was the first to recognize the man whom was Sakura’s current disguise. The female immediately followed as she continued to shout after who she believed was her fellow Zenshin member.

“Hurry!” Sakura screamed back in reply but did not slow her pace for them. One of the Transformation Jutsu’s innate failings that made it unfavorable to use, was that it was difficult to converse with others or perform other mental feats because a ninja had to pour a lot of focus into channeling chakra into maintaining the transformation. It’s the very reason why a lot of transformations didn’t last too long; some people were better at executing it than others. It wasn’t overly difficult for Sakura to engage in conversation while transformed, but she didn’t know her enemy very well or their various jutsu and talents, so she decided to take advantage of the chase element of their interaction to avoid super close proximity.

Like shadowed hounds that thought they had found one of their own kind, they pursued after Sakura, barking after her as their feet collided with the ground, thinking they were joining the hunt when in fact they were chasing the very goose they were after.

“How do you know she went this way, Araki?” a male voice called up to her through the thundering rain, and Sakura barely made it out.

“She’s making a run for the Leaf Village, but we have to catch her before she gets too far over the border!” Sakura called back with the same arrogant confidence Araki had spoken to her with at the brothel.

“How did you escape? Weren’t you with the others at the bathhouse? What happened to them?” the woman’s voice called out again, firing questions off faster than the rain could fall from the sky, and maybe Sasuke had started to rub off on Sakura the past couple of months, but the relentless inquiries were beginning to annoy her.

Sakura didn’t know if she should even attempt to respond. She knew very little about this Araki’s personality, other than the fact that he was loud, bold, and talked incessantly as well. But Sakura was not comfortable sustaining an unrehearsed act for long segments, and was unsure exactly what types of ridiculous comments were normal for the man. A little too late, Sakura wondered if Rugo or Toka would have been a better choice to impersonate with their various stoicism in comparison to Ataki; their seriousness would have suited Sakura’s current circumstances better. As a side note to rationalize her choice, Sakura wasn’t too sure about how Rugo’s blindness affected his abilities, and Sakura naturally wanted to steer clear of casting Toka in more of a negative light in case he really was trying to cut ties with Zenshin as Tabi had claimed.

“We have to move faster!” Sakura deflected, pretending not to hear them as she bounded further ahead of them to create a safer distance between them.

Sakura relentlessly pushed them forward, a shadow before them that they could barely distinguish as it was. She was desperately clinging to the transformation even as she strategically considered her next move. Sakura had crossed the river she and Sasuke had camped at on their second night of traveling together hours ago. She was only minutes away from the border now. For the most part, Sakura had chosen to stick to the same remote path she and Sasuke had taken from Konoha because it was the most recent in her memory and it was a small miracle she wasn’t getting the four of them completely lost in this starless monsoon. At some point over the past hour, she dissected from that trail, travelling northwest for the plains she remembered passing through during a mission with Kakashi, Naruto, and Sai.

The forest thinned as Sakura neared the space between forests, the sizeable meadow surrounded by rocky plateaus like the very mountain the Leaf was built up against. Seeing such familiar forested landscape, Sakura could have wept in relief. Her lungs shuttered from the relentlessness of her breathing and her legs practically felt numb and cold from the freezing rain, but the pain was absolutely miniscule in comparison to the absolute thrill she felt in her bones when she took her first step across an imaginary line only a ninja who had crossed it multiple times would remember even in the hours just before sunrise. She stumbled to a stop in the knee-high grass, wading through ankle-deep flood waters, stealing herself for what was to come. As much as she wanted to fall to her knees, tilt her head up to face the rain, and not get back up, she couldn’t quit yet.

The three ninja following her burst from the trees behind, lurching to a halt when they realized their front-runner had finally stopped. “Did you find her!” one called out to her, but Sakura didn’t answer as she turned to face them. Sensing a change, one of the ninja suddenly stopped in his tracks and held his arm out to halt the others.

“Araki?” he asked, preventing his team from moving any further toward her as she stood unmoving and waiting for them. Sakura wasn’t intending to suddenly act so predatory, her shift in nature causing them to hesitate like all prey before a hunter, but she was just so tired of pretending. She let the transformation fall away and the girl in the group gasped. Sakura could still sense their confusion, and their assessments of her outfit and headband that mirrored their own was almost painful to watch.

Deciding that the charade was truly well and over, Sakura relieved them of their nervous bewilderment. “Unfortunately, no,” she called back, talking loudly to reach them through the persistent deluge around them.

“I was wondering why he was being so quiet,” one of the male voices answered, pushing forward to stand in front of his teammates. “It’s her. The Haruno girl. She’s in disguise.” Sakura could hear the girl gasp again before she grabbed onto the man’s arm fearfully to pause his advance.

Sakura pressed against the inner-pocket of her jacket, whispering, “Are you still with me, Lady Katusyu?”

“Yes, Sakura dear,” the small slug replied, slithering out to greet her despite the rain. “I’m here if you need me.”

“Hang on tight, then,” came Sakura’s instructions as she tucked her back away. “I’ll be sending more your way soon.”

A laughter broke out near the tree line and Sakura saw one man shove forward, past his concerned and apprehensive teammates. Sakura could make out his flashy, red cloak for the first time now that he was closer in the downpour. “You’ve given us exactly what we wanted—lead us far away where no one can help you, now! I am going to have so much fun beating you within an inch of your life!”

“What are you waiting for, then?” Sakura goaded, pleasantly surprised when the cloaked man rushed forward despite his teammates’ beseeching council.

The man charged at her, sloshing his way through the muddy field, and Sakura let him come, let his momentum carry him face first into the punch she had waiting for him. He sailed backward, right into his other male companion and they skipped like scattered stone across the flooding pasture. Even in the dark, Sakura could see the mud [SR1] that sprayed up around them, covering their once distinguishable features in total blackness. That felt so good. After days of secrecy, disguising her power and identity, the release of her physical abilities was positively glorious. Sakura didn’t have a ton of chakra left at her disposal after her repetitive use of the Summoning Technique, but she had the adequate amount remaining in order to take care of these three and anyone who decided to show up later.

The girl, who had avoided the collision, came for Sakura next, and as she neared, Sakura was able to finally get a decent look at her. Her hair was white beneath her black cloak’s cowl and her brow was adorned with the anti-peace symbol. Sakura wanted to talk to her, ask her opinions and learn her story, investigating her personal vendetta against the peace they had all fought so hard for during the Fourth Shinobi War. The girl quickly began to form the signs for a fire release and Sakura’s eyes widened as the heavy rain suddenly steamed around her as it hit the girl’s body and hissed into hot air. When the floodwaters pooled at Sakura’s feet began to bubble, Sakura cursed as she jumped back and into the air to avoid the boiling water below. At first, Sakura feared that the girl might have the Boil Release Kekkei Genkai, a transformation of water and fire nature energies, but as Sakura began to descend from her fall, the girl met her in the air, and Sakura soon realized that she had a unique fire release that allowed her to direct heat from pinpoints on her body. Sakura’s shielding kick that made contact with the girl’s stomach was instantly scorched through her boot from having touched her, and Sakura hissed.

“Die!” the ninja screamed, grabbing onto Sakura’s calf muscle with both burning hands and swinging her right into the arms of her knife-wielding companion. But Sakura gripped the man’s arms and simultaneously kicked against the girls’ stomach, deeper into her magma flesh, gritting her teeth at the pain, but directing her immense strength into the blow. The girl went sailing into the trees just as the red-coated man had done seconds before this second confrontation. Using the same momentum, Sakura swung up and over her captor’s shoulders, slipping easily from his grasp.

She landed behind him, a dark-haired, broad-shouldered man with silver pupil-less irises that reminded Sakura of the Kazekage. She saw these eyes clearly despite the darkness and the mud smeared across his face practically made them glow. The ninja turned on his heel to intercept her next blow, his knife catching her cheek just before he also received the brunt force of her physical strength.

Sakura could feel the water around her already tenderized ankle start to boil again, and Sakura swore, locating the girl with her eyes. Sakura had to admit that this girl was quite literally making it impossible to remain standing on her own two feet. Even if Sakura summoned chakra to the soles of her feet to walk on the surface of the five inches of saturation, Sakura knew that the water would quickly melt through her stolen shoes completely, so Sakura came up with another solution. She wouldn’t let this girl scald her from a distance; if this fire-nature ninja wanted to land another injury on Sakura, she was going to have to get up close and personal, just as Sakura liked it.

Sakura exhaled when her uninjured hand collided with the ground at her feet. “SHANNARO!” she screamed as the entire landscape fractured beneath her, spiderwebbing across the plain until all the rainwater succumbed to gravity, falling down the sides of new projectiles of earth, and down into the fissures. Sakura perched on top of one of the new pillars like a bird of night, staring down at her three recovered enemies who stared up at her with a new appreciation.

“You bitch,” the female spat up at Sakura, but Sakura ignored her. She fisted the anti-peace forehead protector on her brow and tossed it down to the three of them. She pulled back her hood and looked up into the sky as it fell on her face, the rain fingering her dyed tresses until streaks of black began to run down her chin along with the blood from her sliced cheek. Keeping it always on her person, Sakura reached into her vest and revealed her own shinobi headband, the red one bearing the Leaf Village symbol she had worn as a chunin. She tied it tightly against her forehead and across the back of her ink-dripping crown and thought how fitting it felt to bear her flag now that she was standing in Land of Fire territory. She saw her enemies’ shocked and exchanged expressions when green regenerative chakra began to glow around her knuckles, her cheek, and the various burns on her leg and ankle, healing the damage in seconds.

“You guys didn’t do a lot of research on your target, did you?” Sakura called down to them. She couldn’t understand it, the surprise. If they were not originally from Tanigakure, who had been neutral, that would mean they had all fought together in the war. So how did they not know every detail about Sakura? Sakura began to collect various pieces of information in her brain and a realization formed. Most of the members of this organization that Sakura had encountered in Tanigakure so far had not been overly remarkable. Aside from the shade she went head-to-head with in the sands surrounding Suna, everyone seemed to know the bare minimum of Sakura’s power. They knew of her, but not what she was capable of. In fact, they seemed content to hang back and relish in the fear created by their superiors, and Sakura suddenly realized why some of them might be interested in a world that created bitter and stronger generations to follow them. They were those ninja who hung back during the war, who let others—the strong and fearless—do all the work because they could not; it’s why they wanted to mimic conditions that would create strength in other ninja for them to hide behind. Huh, Sakura thought privately to herself. She wondered who exactly was taking advantage of ninja like this to kill off others who stood in their way. Who exactly was the leader?

“We know enough to kill you,” the silver-eyed one spoke, and his voice was raspy and menacing. Even his voice reminded her of the Kazekage, along with the sand-weilder’s path to redemption, and Sakura tried not to be distracted as she imagined this dark-haired ninja capable of a future where he could redirect his efforts into a righteous cause. This type of thinking, while keeping her intentions toward others good, would cloud her judgement now.

“We have to get information from her first and then deliver her to the boss,” reminded the red cloaked one, whom Sakura had all but forgotten was there after she sent him flying for his bold move to attack first.

The other two swapped looks of apprehension to one another, as if they weren’t sure they were going to be able to restrain and deliver blows to get her to talk, after all. And Sakura smiled because, she too, knew that wasn’t going to be happening.

Sakura’s finger bled once again when she bit back into it, and now that the rain had washed away most of her ivory face paint, the Hundred Healing’s seal spanned out across her forehead in black stripes. It was still activated since her very first summoning of Katsuyu, and Sakura could feel the steady drain of chakra from her body that it was costing her to maintain the states of all her captives where she had reverse summoned them back to Katsuyu’s home in Shikkotsu forest. Since Sakura wasn’t having to heal her horde of hostages, but rather, keep them all in an unconscious state, cryogenized in the chamber of Katsuyu’s flesh, the chakra being loaned to her familiar was a trickle, but it was still depleting her already diminishing levels.

“Are you alright, Sakura dear?” came Katsuyu’s voice from the inside pocket of her vest, the slug sensing her labored breathing and strain on the chakra connection between them.

Sakura nodded, whispering, “Yes. I have a few more summons in me. If more enemies appear here, I might not be able to hold onto the jutsu. The connection will be severed between us. What happens then?”

Katsuyu’s answer came back as a whisper in the relentless pattering of rain against Sakura’s flesh. “It will take them all some time to come out of comatose. When they do, they will have nowhere to go. The Shikkotsu forest is an endless maze of jungle. They’ll be in the same spot when you come for them.”

“Excellent,” Sakura responded, reaching into her waistband, and withdrawing three vials of sedative. Privately and expertly, Sakura filled three needles with the drug and placed each between her teeth until three needles protruded from her mouth like the fangs of a demon. Next, Sakura palmed her bloody hand into the top of the jagged steeple of earth on which she still stood and cried “Summoning Jutsu!” as clearly as she could manage with a mouthful of liquid sleep.

The three human-sized divisions of Katsuyu’s body slithered down the sides of the post and came to a stop when Sakura’s own feet touched level ground once more, the water no longer coagulating around her ankles.

“Here she comes!” shouted the girl, and Sakura smirked as she sprinted straight towards them through the rain, engaging each one in a pirouette of hand-to-hand combat.

Just as Sakura had once fought Sasori’s countless puppets on the end of Lady Chiyo’s chakra threads, Sakura took control of her own strings now and navigated smoothly between her enemies’ strikes like a leaf darting on the wind. Deflect, block, strike, defend, parry, punch. The actions were faster than Sakura could even think of which move to execute next, and she let her muscles act on memory alone.

She could feel the heat of the white-haired girl’s skin every time one of her open-palmed strikes grazed Sakura’s body. She was aiming for the most incapacitating of areas like the eyes, her hands, legs, or any other placement that might cripple Sakura temporarily. But every time the ninja got close to landing a hit on her, the sound of sizzling rain would alert Sakura’s sharp ears to her nearness and Sakura would dodge just in time. Sakura focused on the mud covered, silver-eyed enemy before her, turning to the side to dodge his kunai stab to her stomach. She fisted his own weapon hand with her own and used his own piercing thrust to direct it into the stomach of the red-cloaked shinobi who had come up behind her and fisted her inky, wet hair. She heard his cry at the same moment that the grip on her hair slackened. When the white-haired kunoichi recovered and came at her again, Sakura was ready. Grabbing the silver-haired ninja by the leg as he fell, Sakura swung him like her own weapon, right into the burning arms of his companion. The two of them collapsed into a tangle together, and Sakura’s knee was in the man’s back as she sank his body deeper into the lava skin of the fire-wielding ninja until he began to scream. Sakura used his screams to motivate the white-haired ninja. She would eventually stop her fire-nature jutsu.

Sakura couldn’t risk incinerating the needle, so she waited patiently, yanking out the syringe of her mouth in the meantime. She saw the girl’s eyes widen at the damage she was inflicting upon her partner, and the melting instantly stopped. Sakura plunged the needle into her neck, followed by a dose for the silver-eyed ninja. [SR2] They both fell unconscious against one another, and two of three Katusyus had already crawled to meet them.

When Sakura pulled the last syringe from her mouth and turned to face the red-cloaked man who had been stabbed, she was surprised to find him already standing before her in the darkness. He knocked the syringe out of her hand and seized Sakura’s throat, slamming her against one of the pillars of earth at Sakura’s back. The very blade that had lacerated his stomach was now pointing into her navel, still bloody and dripping from his own injury. Sakura’s next move was going to be to knee him directly where his wound bloomed the same shade as his cloak in order to create a safe space between them again. Even if he managed to cut her open, Sakura would use her Mitotic Regeneration Jutsu to heal herself before the blood loss rendered her unconscious. However, his next words made her reevaluate her actions at the last moment.

“When Mozai finally has his way with you, I’m going to enjoy every minute of it,” he snarled as he pinned her body with his. The knife in his hand dug into her flesh with every word and Sakura hissed at the sudden pain.

As she reached up to push against his hold on her throat, she choked out, “Who’s Mozai? Is he your boss?” She pretended to weaken at his hold. She needed to keep him talking and feeding her the information she wanted.

“Someone who will do a lot worse to you than I’m about to do.” His knife suddenly pulled away from her and began to snake up Sakura’s clothing, cutting a trail of blood up her bare stomach. She gritted her teeth against the pain, holding back the instinct to break the wrist around her throat. If Sakura could just get him back on the topic of her choice.

“He’s nothing without his henchmen. Didn’t you want to know what happened to the others?” she strained to ask next, spluttering the words, trying to regain his attention.

He laughed, a cruel, wicked laugh that reminded Sakura of the deranged Orochimaru. It was the sort of laugh that alerted her to his madness, the deeper and more dangerous kind of madness that a medic such as herself was easily able to recognize no matter how hard one tried to hide it. “He knows where you’ve run off to, and we will find the others soon enough now that I know your pets have taken them.” He pushed harder against her throat and despite her efforts to remain calm and focus, Sakura’s vision still blackened from the lack of oxygen and her grip on him tightened. In that moment, Sakura barely even felt Kaguya’s small body drop from her clothing. With her squinting eyes, Sakura witnessed the small slug make a dash for the syringe that Sakura had dropped earlier. At the same time, she realized that Katsuyu knew that it was their last dose of sedative and the slug wanted to either protect or retrieve it for Sakura.

The rain was still coming down so hard, a shower soaking every inch of Sakura’s newly exposed stomach. It made the knife he was ghosting her skin with wet and slick as it bounced against her skin, causing knicks and superficial lacerations where it touched. Sakura couldn’t tell if she was only feeling the rain, or the trickling of her own blood. Was it pooling at her feet with the man’s own colors of red?

“But he won’t mind if I have my fun with you first before he gets here,” came his thickened voice as he placed the hilt of his kunai between his teeth and replaced the pressure against her stomach with his fingers. They caressed her abdomen, smearing the blood there. Sakura realized in this moment that the game of holding back for information was over.

But before she could act, break his hold on her, and shove him away from her, Sakura’s stomach dropped as her vision came to focus over the man’s shoulder at the shadow that stood there in the rain, red eye flashing as he unsheathed his katana. The rain rendered him nearly invisible in the dark and Sakura sucked in a breath of alarm.

“You’re going to die if you don’t let go,” came Sakura’s hurried warning to the man still inching his hand up her shirt. The vice on Sakura’s throat instantly slackened when a blade came across the man’s throat, not hesitating to sunder the man’s head from his shoulders. Before the damage was inflicted, Sakura’s hand shot out and grabbed Sasuke’s katana just in time, the bite of the blade sliding against the palm of her hand until she stopped its movement completely with her grip. She fisted the quaking blade, and it was immediately abandoned.

Sakura was powerless to stop what happened next. In the very next second, the man was thrown from her, catapulted near across the field as Sasuke pivoted to ram his fist into the side of the man’s face. Sasuke, too, disappeared as he teleported, switching positions with the bloody kunai the man had possessed. Before the kunai stuck true in the grass at Sakura’s feet, the Uchiha was on top of his victim in a millisecond, and Sakura could hear the man’s screams as she ran toward them in the rain, still clutching Sasuke’s katana in a bloody grip.

“Sasuke, don’t!” she screamed, desperate to reach him in time. Sakura soon realized that the distance the man had been sent wasn’t just a coincidence. It served two purposes: to deliver a harder impact, and to generate enough space from Sakura to give Sasuke the extra second of time to exact whatever revenge he had in mind. The kunoichi spared one minute to find Katsuyu, a bright pinpoint of white in the overwhelming darkness. Beneath the slug, lay the last injection of sedative, and she scooped them both up.

“Follow me,” she instructed the last of the three summonings of Katsuyu’s body.

The screaming was Sakura’s only compass in the storm, guiding her to the source of the brutalization. When she finally neared them, two dark obscurities in the night, Sasuke was fisting both of the man’s hands with his single grasp. The black flames of Amaterasu were already ravishing the bones of his ten fingers.

“You seem awfully fond of these hands of yours,” Sasuke sneered, “let’s begin here, shall we?” The flames spread to the man’s palms and then his wrists, a drawn-out creeping of flickering black that couldn’t be anything other than an intentional deliberateness—to maximize the pain of it. The red-cloaked ninja’s screams were louder than any suffering Sakura had ever heard.

The kunoichi could see the smirk on Sasuke’s face as she finally came around to face him, and her stomach turned to ice. Even his words delivered a blow to her heart in a familiar way. It was like the Chunin Exams: the ferocity, the visible fury rolling off of him in waves, the embracing of inner-darkness. Sakura had only ever seen Sasuke resort to methods of torture a few times in her life, and the sight struck such fear into her heart. Don’t you see? She thought to herself at the terrifying vision of the Uchiha stooped over the scorching man. Don’t you see what the price of his love will be?

“Sasuke! Stop! You can’t kill him!” she shouted over the rain and guttural begging, grabbing onto the Uchiha’s clothing, fisting the wet fabric in her fingers. He didn’t budge, just let the fire spread as he watched and drank the pinned man’s screams, as if hearing them would quench a deeply buried thirst.

When Sakura’s immense strength lifted Sasuke to his feet and pulled him away from the man, Sasuke’s leer twisted into a frown and a different sort of fury filled his eyes. As if Sasuke sensed her impending interference and decided to finish the job before she could convince him to stop, the fire erupted over the man’s chest with a quickening ferocity. At his resolve, Sakura panicked, making Sasuke look at her with two palms to his face.

His dead eyes found her, and he spat a response to her previous demand, “He doesn’t get to live.”

The earsplitting screams intensified, and Sakura physically shook Sasuke, but he just glared down at her as the flames resumed their feast upon the man’s vaporizing flesh. “You’re not going to do this. You can’t kill someone because of me. I won’t let you go back to that!”

The words broke Sasuke’s carefully controlled anger. “I have spared hundreds today in your name! If it weren’t for you, they would all be dead. One of them can die, and it’s going to be him.”

“This isn’t who you are anymore!” Sakura shouted, willing her words into a truthful existence. She would hold on to him, the Sasuke she loved. The Sasuke who could see reason, act on ninja principles, and not let his emotions override his judgment. Not anymore. As a last attempt, she added. “You can be merciful. You don’t have to kill unless it’s absolutely necessary.”

Sasuke scoffed, choosing not to hide his smoldering ire as he broke eye contact with Sakura in order to survey the damage being done to the man who had attacked her. “It’s necessary.”

When he didn’t say anything else, Sakura demanded, “Spare one more. This is my mission and I need him to live.”

After a moment of deliberation, Sasuke snarled, like an animal being forced to give up its kill, and turned his back to her. With the dying of the Amaterasu, the screams turned into painful whimpers as the man spasmed on the ground.

Sakura knelt beside the man, who now looked at her with desperation in his eyes. A begging for mercy that hadn’t been there earlier, now glistened with tears. “Remember that I spared your life,” Sakura told him, penetrating the vein in his collar with the needle of the syringe. “Maybe one day, a future version of you will deserve it.” The man’s eyelids fell, and even in his unconsciousness, Sakura could sense the relief that came with oblivion. The third slug had appeared by her side, and Sakura watched as Lady Katsuyu began channeling Sakura’s chakra in order to heal the man’s injuries. They were deep, penetrating wounds that would require intensive medical treatment. The draw on Sakura’s reserves zapped her, real fatigue coming over her now.

“I can’t hold the summoning,” Sakura relayed to the two Katsuyus, one small and gliding over Sakura’s shoulder, the other encapsulating the injured man as the creature healed his injuries. She was the first to vanish, just like all those summoned before.

“Don’t worry about me,” came Katsuyu’s small reassuring voice. “I can handle the rest until you arrive. Will you be okay?”

Sakura nodded, “Yes. Thank you, Lady Katsuyu.” With the last of the jutsu released, Sakura exhaled a sigh of relief as the drain on her chakra reserves lessened. She caught her breath, sitting in the muddy grass for a moment.

When she turned to Sasuke, he was standing over her, silently brooding with an emotionless mask slipped back into place.

Sakura wanted to yell at him for his recklessness. For interfering when she was more than capable of handling this herself. “You have potentially jeopardized my mission,” she informed him bitterly, rising to stand toe to toe with him.

He didn’t respond, unmoving as he received her rebuke. Even the rain hailed down on them harder if that were even possible. And then the Uchiha was moving, taking her bloody palm, the hand that had come between Sasuke’s killing blow and his victim, between his fingers. She fisted it rebelliously, stiffening her arm, not quite ready to let her anger go.

And so he grabbed her wrist instead, pulling her with him toward the circumference of trees closest to them.

“I can’t leave,” she protested, digging her heals more firmly into the ground. She became immovable. “More of them could be on their way. I need to intercept them.” Sakura didn’t know how many more there would be, or what she was going to do to incapacitate them now that she was no longer able to summon Katsuyu. She would have to dig deep, fight until she couldn’t stand, pummeling them until she knocked them unconscious.

Still not looking at anything but the wrist in which he gripped as if Sakura could be ripped away at any second, Sasuke confessed. “Every person who was headed in this direction in pursuit of you tonight was handled. I shoved each of them into another dimension.”

Sakura’s eyebrows rose as she stared at him speechlessly. For the first time since she observed him, Sakura noticed his heavy breathing. His Rinnegan eye was closed and the Sharingan deactivated, and Sakura recognized the tell of his exhaustion. He had overexerted himself, definitely a sign that he really had transported an unknown number of men through his Rinnegan’s portal tonight.

“At least for now, let’s get out of this rain,” he told her. “There’s a place not far from here.”

Sakura pulled her hand free from his grasp and Sasuke didn’t move to take it again, accepting and mirroring her own frustration. After a moment, he turned, and Sakura followed the coiled back of the Uchiha into the shelter of the trees, allowing him to lead her from the battlefield.

#naruto #ssfanfiction #naruto fanfiction #sakura hiden #sakura haruno #sakura uchiha #approaching sun #narutoshippuden #naruto gaiden #approachingsun #sasusakufanfiction #sasusaku

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iyeonjuni · 4 years ago

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pairing: choi beomgyu x f!reader

genre: fake dating!au, highschool!au, social media au

synposis: when the son to the CHOI GROUP beomgyu, puts his PE uniform with his name on it inside y/n’s (never locked) locker in a rush, y/n mistakenly wears it for her PE class. as the whole class starts noticing beomgyu’s name on y/n’s well his uniform, people start assuming they are dating. beomgyu shuts down the rumors but what if y/n insists on playing the role?

contains: fluff, profanity and maybe some angst

featuring: yeji from itzy, karina from aespa

start date: december 1st, 2021

updates: monday to friday

status: completed (january 8th, 2022)

notes: literally been a day since my last smau ended but tbh this has been simmering in my drafts for a long time now… ANYWAYS ITS BEOMGYU NEXT WOWIE!! get ready for some shy boy gyu and a wild y/n coming your way. please send me an ask if you want to be on the tag list! hope you enjoy, 'casted'.

TAGLIST: CLOSED

profiles pt 1 / profiles pt 2 / chapter 1 / chapter 2 / chapter 3 / chapter 4 / chapter 5 / chapter 6 / chapter 7 / chapter 8 / chapter 9 / chapter 10 / chapter 11 / chapter 12 / chapter 13 / chapter 14 / chapter 15 / chapter 16 / chapter 17 / chapter 18 / chapter 19 / chapter 20 / chapter 21 / chapter 22 / chapter 23 / chapter 24 / chapter 25 / chapter 26 / chapter 27 / chapter 28 / bonus chapter / special chapter

#txt smau #txt au #txt fake text #txt fluff #txt imagines #txt scenarios #txt social media au #beomgyu scenario #beomgyu scenarios #beomgyu smau #beomgyu imagine #beomgyu imagines #beomgyu social media au #txt fic #beomgyu fic

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kariachi · 2 years ago

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Okay let’s look at figuring out some dragon size ratios!

Carenath at nearly a year is almost Cricket’s height in the shoulder

Cricket’s estimated shoulder height is 16 hands

All the Weyrs of Pern puts Ramoth and Mnementh at three times the size of Faranth and Carenath

Carenath is smaller than Ruth

Ruth is half a head bigger than ‘any runner beast’, ‘half the size of his fellows’, ‘full head higher in the shoulder than runner beasts’, as per The White Dragon

9th Pass dragon lengths

Green- 20-25 ft

Blue- 25-30 ft

Brown- 30-35 ft

Bronze- 35-38 ft

Gold- 38-42 ft

Ramoth full length 45 ft

DLG describes Ruth as 20 feet long, but since we’re working off foot measurements here and this doesn’t align with his being ‘half’ the size of other dragons as stated in the books (more like 1/3) I think we can safely set it aside for now

Considering these notes, before anything else we should be working out the shoulder heights for Carenath and Ruth. We don’t know for certain Carenath’s full shoulder height, but given no further physical growth is mentioned in DragonsDawn we can safely make the assumption that he was pretty much at full growth there. We don’t get a specific or even approximate measurement for how much shorter in the shoulder Carenath is compared to Cricket, but Sean feels it’d be easy to transfer directly from one to the other, so the difference can’t be too great. We’ll say just over 15 hands mayhaps? Enough to be notable, especially when later compared to Ruth, but not so much hopping from one onto the other would be a bad idea.

So, our shoulder height estimate for Carenath is then at 5′2″.

For Ruth it’s a littler harder as don’t know what size horses they’re talking about and apparently can’t quite decide how much larger he is than them. We know from the DLG that the Pernese started off with Shires for their draft horses, among which stallions average about 17.2 hands, so we’re going to assume he’s a hand passed that at 18.2 hands, to fit with the ‘half head larger than any runner beast’ comment. The average horse is 15 hands, so this would be about a foot taller in the shoulder than them, so might be a bit iffy for the ‘full head higher’ comment, but we work with what we’ve got.

Making the estimate for Ruth’s shoulder height 6 ft.

Now, Ruth is stated to be half the size of his fellow dragons, which doesn’t really tell you too much given the range of sizes there, but you do what you can. We know he’s in proportion to other dragons, if nothing else. Now, given a full 50% of dragons are greens and they’re the ones things like ‘a dragonlength’ is determined by, I think we can safely go with him being compared to greens here.

So, if we assume Ruth is compared to greens in size, and the average length of a green is 22.5 ft, we can assume that Ruth is about 11′4″ long.

Which means that our estimated height:length ratio for Ruth, and since he’s in proportion all dragons, is 1:1.87.

This, actually lines up pretty well with the ratio given in the DLG, which was 1:1.9. And actually looking at it the First Pass dragon measurements listed there fit damn near perfectly with our estimates for Ruth here. In fact if anything our Ruth measurements are more square. And using this ratio Carenath would be 9′7″ long.

Seems a bit small given All the Weyrs of Pern.

So we’ve already run into what might be a problem. Not for me because I’m just trying to work out something vaguely in line with canon by way of numbers and otherwise give no shits, but for consistency in canon.

Though we’re Pern fans so, who’s really looking for consistency?

So, we’ll back up, take another angle. We can do a few of these, it’s fun. This time we’ll look into that ‘third the size of Ramoth and Mnementh’ thing.

So, in The White Dragon Mnementh is estimated by Robinton to be the largest of the bronze dragons and to my knowledge we don’t have a canon length for him, so we have to assume it’s about 38 ft- the maximum listed for bronzes. We could go larger, but given we’re not given anything besides ‘bigger than other bronzes and smaller than Ramoth’, certainly not- to my memory- anything to say he’s challenging golds for size like Canth does bronzes, I’d rather stick with our given limits there.

So, if Carenath is a third Mnementh’s size, we can assume his length is 12′7″. Using the estimate height above, that would make the height:length ratio of dragons 1:2.4

Using that ratio, again assuming Ruth is half the size of a green, Ruth would be 4′8″ at the shoulder, or about 14 hands. So, probably smaller than Carenath. Certainly not bigger than a horse.

So okay, let’s bump the Ruth size up a bit then, give it a test. He’s certainly not meant to be half the size of a brown or some such, because that’d only be about 25% smaller than a small green and so not likely to be worth quite as much hand wringing as apparently happened. So we’ll bump him up a rank. Half the size of your average blue, 27.5 ft, leaving him at 13′9″ long. Using the above ratio that would put his shoulder height at 5′8″, or about 17.1 hands.

See that fits much better with what’s described in the stories. Still seems a bit low, for something described as larger than any horse, though.

So, if we use this to assume a 1:2.4 height:length ratio for dragons, what do we get as our average for the various ranks in the Ninth Pass?

Greens: Height- 9.3 ft ; Length- 22.5 ft

Blues: Height- 11.4 ft ; Length- 27.5 ft

Browns: Height- 13.5 ft ; Length- 32.5 ft

Bronzes: Height- 15.2 ft ; Length- 36.5 ft

Golds: Height- 16.6 ft ; Length- 40 ft

But the real test of accuracy here is to check the estimated Carenath height vs an estimated Mnementh height, so let’s go.

Mnementh estimated height- 15.8 ft

Third Mnementh estimated height- 5.2 ft

Carenath estimated height- 5.16 ft

So it works at least, more or less. Close enough to government work.

Of course this is based off an estimate that assumed Carenath was done growing. The DLG described the grown first clutch as being 16 and 18 hands at the shoulder, and given the closeness of our first estimate I’d be remiss to just skip over that in this post.Given the first clutch consisted of browns, bronzes, and golds, it’s probably safe to assume that going by these number Carenath probably would’ve ended up somewhere around 17 hands (note: underneath our initial Ruth estimate but about even with our third). This would leave us with a ratio of about 1:2.25.

With this ratio our ‘half-a-green’ Ruth would be 5 ft at the shoulder- again rather small- and our ‘half-a-blue’ Ruth would be 6.1 ft at the shoulder. In this case ‘half-a-green’ Ruth is a the only one smaller than Carenath, while the other is just a bit bigger, about 9%.

But then this same page of the DLG describes the first clutch of dragons as being 10-12 feet long, while, again, the ‘Carenath is 1/3 a Mnementh’ gives us a dragon nearly 14 ft long. So we would have to toss out one or the other.

But, let’s look at the dragon sizes for the ratio before we go poking further.

Greens: Height- 10 ft ; Length- 22.5 ft

Blues: Height- 12.2 ft ; Length- 27.5 ft

Browns: Height- 14.4 ft ; Length- 32.5 ft

Bronzes: Height- 16.2 ft ; Length- 36.5 ft

Golds: Height- 17.7 ft ; Length- 40 ft

And of course our bronze ratio-

Mnementh estimated height- 16.8 ft

Third Mnementh estimated height- 5.6 ft

Carenath estimated height- 5.6 ft

Huh, perfect fit, nice. The numbers at their source still don’t line up with what we’re getting here, but again, this is Pern. When does anything line up in Pern? Have you read Dragon’s Kin? You stop hoping for consistency after that.

So, if you make Ruth one rank bigger than generally assumed, and base your numbers off a combination of All the Weyrs of Pern and the DLG, then you can make the numbers line up.

What you can’t do is explain why, when greens are running around carrying groups of people and supplies around like it’s nothing, people would be fretting over whether something that’s closer to 2/3-3/4 of the size of one can carry one teenager. But then you can’t explain that for any Ruth, because he’s just logically big enough, given what other dragons are capable of, to fly with Jaxom even if they assumed he would only be half as capable because he’s half the size. Even if he was estimated to only be a quarter as capable for being half the size.

But. We’re backing off it. The woman had people asking if fucking newborn dragons could be ridden at 10-days-old in DragonsDawn, clearly nobody is allowed basic sense.

Instead I’m gonna do quick math, using all three of the height:length ratios in this post and the rank ratios from older posts to, with the assumption that Carenath is of average size, give us a list of size averages for each one for the First Pass.

1:1.87

Greens: Height- 3 ft ; Length- 5.7 ft

Blues: Height- 3.8 ft ; Length- 7.1 ft

Browns: Height- 4.5 ft ; Length- 8.5 ft

Bronzes: Height- 5.16 ft ; Length- 9.6 ft

Golds: Height- 5.6 ft ; Length- 10.5 ft

1:2.4

Greens: Height- 3.1 ft ; Length- 7.6 ft

Blues: Height- 3.9 ft ; Length- 9.4 ft

Browns: Height- 4.6 ft ; Length- 11.2 ft

Bronzes: Height- 5.16 ft ; Length- 12.6 ft

Golds: Height- 5.75 ft ; Length- 13.8 ft

1:2.25

Greens: Height- 3.3 ft ; Length- 7.6 ft

Blues: Height- 4.1 ft ; Length- 9.4 ft

Browns: Height- 4.9 ft ; Length- 11.2 ft

Bronzes: Height- 5.6 ft ; Length- 12.6 ft

Golds: Height- 6.1 ft ; Length- 13.8 ft

For those wondering, anything under 4.8 ft in height is pony sized, and anything under 3.1 ft in height is miniature horse sized. So presumably somewhere either numbers have gone horribly wrong, or the dragons all started out around the same size and just, fuckers got proportionally smaller over time for some reason? Kitti could figure out how to make them all riding sized but not not how to keep them mostly even? Or maybe that’s why the DLG says it took the whole damn Pass for them to fill Fort with dragons, half of them were just too damn small to take up space or count among the fighting ranks.

Or maybe Anne just didn’t think ahead on these things. It’s entirely possible.

#pern analysis #thinky-thoughts #i think this counts

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dari-ede · 3 years ago

Text

In the Middle of the Night: Ch. 3

Chapter 3: “Fading in and out of Long Nights”

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Summary: As Bangtan prepares for a new chapter in their lives, they head to their private property in the forest for a songwriting workshop. As a songwriter and producer they have worked with for years, I’m asked to tag along. I was ready for the heavy workload and small amount of sleep during the workshop week. However, I wasn’t ready for the storm that came that changed my friendship with Namjoon forever.

Genre: Friends to Lovers, Fluff and Smut

Pairing: Idol!Namjoon x Female Reader

Rating: M (future sexually explicit scenes)

Status: COMPLETE

Note: There will be a few other celebrities making appearances, but will only be briefly. This is mostly an RMxOC story.

Guest appearance: Jackson Wang (Got7). He'll pop up a couple of times.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

It had been days since the meeting with BH and the guys. I was fully at work on different projects, such as the workshops for the guys and other songs for other HYBE artists. It was around noon while I was finishing a draft when I received a “good morning” message from Namjoon.

Before responding to him, I emailed my draft to PD Bang and CC’d the song’s other producers. I responded to Namjoon and headed to the kitchen. Soon, we were messaging back and forth as I cleaned my dishes.

Me: Try ‘afternoon’, lazy. What time did you go to sleep?

Moni: 3? 4?

Me: I went to sleep at 2. And still managed to get my ass out of bed by 8.

Moni: You’re a more self-disciplined person than I am. This is not news

Me: Are you at least out of bed?

Moni: Yeah just showered

Me: Yuuuum

Moni: kkkkk. What were you doing? Working?

Even through text Namjoon still got shy and would dodge any flirtatious comments I would make. I could practically see him blushing. As much as I wanted to continue to teasing him, I cut him a break.

Me: A little. I was about to start on workshop ideas

Moni: I was going to work on them, too. Want to meet up and go over a few things?

Me: Sure. RKive?

Moni: Yeah I can meet you there in 2 hours.

Me: 2 hours? You live 20 minutes away. It takes you that long to get dolled up?

Moni: I need coffee and food

Me: I have leftovers from my burrito this morning. Want some?

Moni: …what kind of burrito?

Me: I can add sausage. It won’t be vegan. I know you like your meat.

Moni: Thank you!

Me: Meet you there in an hour.

As soon as he liked my comment, I started on the burrito. I ended up having enough for two. I decided to add more kimchi and rice, knowing Namjoon’s palate preference. After I packaged the burritos, I took a quick shower.

I decided on a casual look so I threw on some jeans shorts with a yellow blouse. Before leaving, I walked to the mirror for a critical look at my outfit.

I used to be a laidback type of girl who didn’t care much for style. My go-to outfit used to be baggy jeans and a simple tee or shorts with an oversized t-shirt. But living in Seoul, made me pay attention to what material and color went best with me. I even accessorized now. However, my makeup continued to be minimal.

I decided on a few accessories and quickly braided my hair. I noticed I was running late, so I hurried out.

The traffic to HYBE was a bit heavy; I arrived later than I would have preferred. I managed to get out of HYBE elevators and to Namjoon's studio with two minutes to spare. Namjoon was usually early, so I was surprised to find his studio locked. It was rare when he ran late. I took off my shoes as I waited for him.

No more than a minute later, I heard footsteps coming down the hall. I glanced up and saw it was Namjoon semi-jogging towards me. He was wearing khaki shorts, a sleeveless white shirt, Nikes, a black bucket hat, his signature silver hoop earrings, a working bag over his shoulder, and an iced coffee at hand. He certainly had come a long way since his chain-wearing, mohawk hair, and heavy eyeliner days. Back when he was lanky and his arms were thin, but now strutted around like some bulky hunk.

“Sorry,” he said, snapping me away from drooling over him. “Were you waiting long?” He took off his shoes and unlocked the door.

I decided to mess with him. “Like ten minutes. Your burritos are cold,” I said as I waved the small bag in my hand that contained his breakfast.

He reached down and gently took them from my hand. He leaned in several inches until I was at eye level with his hooded, brown eyes. A warm quiver made its way down my back. “Liar,” he accused. “I saw you running into the elevator from the front lobby. You beat me by a minute.” He pulled back as he opened the door and held it open for me.

I smiled mischievously and brushed past him. “Why didn’t you call out to me? I would have waited for you.”

“I wanted to see if you would be honest with me. You failed.” He closed the door behind us.

I looked around to see what I could use as a desk. “Can I use that for my laptop?” I asked, pointing to the wooden side table against the wall.

He nodded and moved it for me in front of the couch.

“Thank you.” I took out my things and set shop on the wooden table.

Namjoon went over to his desk and organized himself. Once he was settled, he took out his burritos. He opened his mouth so wide, eyes looking as if they were going to pop out of their sockets, but would only consume a small amount of food. He looked so adorable taking such big, small bites from his food. I smiled privately at his cuteness.

We chatted for a bit before we started on some ideas he had for his workshop.

We worked for six hours straight, and it was I who spoke up about taking a break.

I noticed Namjoon was starting to rub his temple a little too much. It was a habit of his I now recognized to mean he needed food in his system.

He looked hesitant, but when I pulled out the menu options on my phone of where we could order from, he was fully intrigued.

After putting in our order, we continued to work. Once one of the BH staff brought our order up, we set aside our work. Namjoon moved to the floor next to me and we began to eat. Finally, we were able to fully chat about non-work-related topics.

“I finished the book last night,” Namjoon stated as he took a bite from his noodles.

I wasn’t sure which book he was referring to. He was going back and forth between two books I had recommended. “Alire Sáenz or Ngozi Adichie?”

“Alire Sáenz.”

“Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe?” I smiled as I asked the question.

His dimples instantly appeared as he chortled. “You enjoy saying that title.”

“It’s an awesome title. Why do you think I chose the book?”

He nodded, sweetly agreeing with me.

For the next ten minutes, we went over the novel and our thoughts on the characters and their different relationships with their parents. Namjoon related to Dante’s relationship with his parents: they were supportive, openly caring, and had great communication. I, on the other hand, found my relationship with my parents was similar to Ari’s with his own parents: distant and as if there was a heavily guarded secret that kept our relationship distant.

As I spoke, Namjoon placed his right hand on his chin with his fingers lingering across his mouth, as he looked at me intently with his warm, brown eyes. He always made me feel as if I had his undivided attention. Once I finished my explanation of why I familiarized myself with Ari, Namjoon's brows were lightly knitted together. “Have you brought this up to your parents? Feeling that there is something that keeps you from fully bonding?”

I brought up my legs to my chest, feeling a little too exposed and in need to get some physical security around me. “Getting Latinos to speak openly about their feelings is a very hard task. Often when I bring up an issue, they dismiss it. I know a little of my dad’s upbringing: an alcoholic father and a mother who worked much too hard to feed that habit instead of feeding the hunger of her six children. My mother grew up in an abusive household. Growing up, the only emotion they saw displayed by their parents was anger—which then bled into their own relationship. My brothers and I witnessed the toxicity. It’s generations of trauma.”

He was quiet for a moment as if analyzing it all. “You do well in speaking up.” There was a slight look of admiration in his eyes.

“There’s a difference between speaking up and opening up. Latinos have no problem being confrontational. We thrive off a good yelling match,” I said laughing. “But ask us about any childhood trauma? That’s when the beer and shots begin.”

“Why do you think you’re so different? You don’t hide from being open and honest.” A light smile lingered on his face.

“Therapy worked. And then my Tia Jia helped. She would ask me how I was doing—mostly focusing on my emotions. During the countless Korean lessons she gave me, I would also have small therapy sessions with her.” I smiled at the memory. I was grateful to my mother’s best friend—the woman who took on the role that the person who birthed me couldn’t. It upset me that I wasn’t close to my mother but having the relationship I did with my Tia Jia was one I adored and wouldn’t trade for anything. “Plus, I’m not really open to everyone. I might be openly caring and loving but talking about my emotions? I only do that with a few people.”

Namjoon’s dimples appeared. “I’m one of the lucky few?”

The question made me feel a little shy; he knew the answer. “I don’t even think I’ve told Hobi some of the things I’ve told you.” I could feel my cheeks getting warm. While I made friends easily and did well in social settings, I was very reserved. I had always kept my emotions and concerns to myself. But in the last two years, Namjoon had a way of getting me to open up with little to no effort.

There was silence in the room. I could feel brown eyes on me.

His deep voice rang in the small, quiet room. “I’m honored you feel you can open up to me.”

I let out an uncomfortable laugh. “Well, I might open up a little more to Hobi but he spends too much of his free time with his girlfriend. You’re equally as lonely as I am, so it’s easy to use you as my personal therapist.”

This made him break into laughter.

Suddenly the door rattled; the loud noise snapping our attention away from each other.

“Shit!” Namjoon jumped a little. These boys got scared too easily.

We both turned to the door and found a silhouette coming from the other side.

Namjoon let out a sigh that was reserved for his brothers. “He’s so needy.”

We watched as Jimin made movements against the door.

“You need to take a cue from Yoongi and install a keypad.” I began to clean up my stuff.

“I should,” Namjoon muttered.

Jimin continued his movements against the door.

“What do you want?” Namjoon called out to the door but didn’t make a motion to go to it.

Jimin heard this as an invitation and opened the door himself. He looked slightly flushed as if he had been working out for a good while. At seeing me, he gave me one of his flirtatious smiles. “Hi, noona.”

“Hi, cutie.” I grabbed my plate of leftovers. “Hungry?”

His eyes popped at the sight of food and he licked his lips. He let me feed him some noodles.

“How was the shoot?” asked Namjoon. He made his way to his chair.

Jimin nodded as he chewed and gave a thumbs up.

“What were you shooting?” I asked.

Still chewing, he answered, “A dance for the new Butter release.”

“Oh, the one with Megan Thee Stallion’s part?” I asked excitedly.

Jimin eyed me. “Did Namjoonie-hyung tell you or was it Hobi?”

“Hope,” I answered. “He sent me a couple videos of the practices. That footwork is complicated but you guys look tight.”

Jimin nodded. “It was difficult but fun. We shot it like 100 times yesterday.” He gave a small head shake. “What are you two up to?” He took another bite of food.

“Workshops.”

Jimin made a noise indicating he understood, but he didn’t hold too much interest in discussing it. After a moment of silence, I felt Jimin’s eyes were on me. I turned and noticed he was in fact looking at me with a smile on his face.

“What?” I asked. I had a sense his answer was going to annoy me.

He giggled and then turned to Namjoon, who had his back to us and writing something down. Jimin turned back to me, his smile only wider.

“What?” I demanded.

After a giggle, he cleared his throat and composed himself. “You look nice in that blouse.”

I frowned and looked down at my attire. Was I dressed inappropriately? The blouse fit me fine, I thought. It barely showed any cleavage.

Jimin continued to smile at his inside joke.

“Ignore him,” Namjoon advised, his back still to us.

Jimin then started one of his giggle fits.

I turned to Namjoon, completely lost.

Namjoon was dismissive. “He’s dumb. He took something I said out of context.”

“What?”

He let out a sigh. “I mentioned the other day how yellow looks good on you.”

This further confused me. “Ok?”

“He also went on to talk about that purple sweater you wear sometimes,” Jimin said, looking at Namjoon with a secret look.

Namjoon sent him a death stare.

“What sweater?” I asked.

“There’s this purple sweater you wore in the spring,” Namjoon said with reluctance. “I said the color complimented your skin tone. But Jimini likes to make something out of nothing.”

Jimin gave a breathy chortle.

Namjoon looked over at Jimin, looking more than done with him. “Are you in need for attention again? Did Hobi and Jungkook not give you enough of it?”

“I don’t know what you mean,” Jimin said innocently.

Namjoon stood up and started to kick his little brother out. Jimin put up a small fight.

Before Jimin left, he turned to me. “Are you still going bowling tonight?”

I nodded. “Yups. I’ll meet you there.”

He said his goodbye and allowed Namjoon to push him out of the room.

“What is going on with him?” I asked, remembered how he had been the other night at dinner. As if he had some sort of secret.

“I’m telling you—he’s dumb,” Namjoon said dismissively. “Who else is going bowling?” he asked, wanting to change the subject.

“A few others. Want to come?” I asked. A mutual friend had invited Jimin, me, and a few others some days ago. I wasn’t sure if it was ok to invite Namjoon but it felt awkward not to at this moment.

“What time?” he asked as he sat back on his chair.

“7, I think. It’s a private party. A small group of us is going. We’ll have a private room.”

“Yeah, sounds fun.”

“Jimin has the address. Catch a ride with him.”

“Yeah, I’ll be sure to stick him in the trunk.”

I smiled and then checked the time. It was getting a little late and there were still a couple of things I wanted to do before bowling.

“I need to get going. I need to run errands.” I began to gather my stuff.

Namjoon nodded. “Ok. I’ll see you later. Want to meet up again to plan?”

“Sure. Text me what times you’re free. I’m meeting Yoongi tomorrow and Tae in a couple of days.” I stuck the last piece of item inside my bag.

Namjoon looked a bit taken aback. “Suga asked for help?”

I scoffed. “No. I’m inviting myself over and helping him plan it out. Otherwise, he’ll just make something up the morning of his workshop.”

He tilted his head. “That tends to work for him.”

“I know. But can you imagine how better his songs could be if he took his time with them, rather than working on them for an hour and just submitting them as is?” I was secretly jealous of how Yoongi was able to create masterpieces in such little time. He never stressed over a song; he just let a song be. I was the opposite. I overanalyzed every lyric and chord and beat.

Namjoon chuckled. “Don’t be too disappointed when all he does is ignore you.”

“Oh, I’m gonna make it happen.” I took my bag.

As I turned to the door, Namjoon was already there and opening it for me. I thanked him as I stepped outside. “See you in a bit.”

He gave a gentle wave. “Bye.”

I noticed he didn’t go back into the studio until I was turning the corner.

~~~~~

After getting groceries, I did a few chores around my apartment and decided to take a small nap. There was no way I was going to make it past midnight without one.

By the time I woke up, I noticed I didn’t have long to get ready. I cursed myself for not setting an alarm, but I had no idea my body had felt so exhausted.

I rushed to my closet and took out one of my favorite jeans along with the first shirt that would go well with it. My braid was a mess, so I decided to pull it apart. It was still damp from my shower in the morning, so I applied some product. It was naturally curly, and the braid had tightened the curls. Thankfully, I was out of my apartment at a decent time.

When I arrived at the location, a couple of friends were already there, including Jungkook.

Namjoon and Jimin arrived a few minutes later. I was sure their tardiness was due to Jimin. They had taken a car together; it was only natural that Namjoon would arrive late as well.

Jimin was sporting a pair of slacks and a cozy sweater while Namjoon wore overalls and a loose white t-shirt underneath. He had ditched his timberlands for combat boots. He pulled the outfit like a model.

Everyone exchanged greetings with the pair of them.

I caught Jimin staring at me and he give a small giggle. I ignored him.

Jungkook frowned at Namjoon. “I thought you were working in the studio tonight.”

Jungkook was standing behind me with his hands on my shoulders, I could feel his nose get close to my hair and take a whiff of it. This was not uncommon for him to do, so it didn’t bother me.

Namjoon shook his head. “I’ll do that after,” he said as he took a seat next to me.

After we settled on the teams, a staff came over to take out drink orders. I asked for a martini.

As the staff walked away, Namjoon turned to me with a serious face.

“Aren’t you driving, Maya?” His face was full of concern.

“It’s one drink. We’re going to be here for at least an hour. And if I don’t feel fine, then I can just walk around the corner to that one dumpling place and sober up before I leave,” I explained. I knew my limitations. I would never drive under the influence, which is why I wanted to have a drink right at the beginning of the game, so I had enough time to get it off my system.

Namjoon gave a nod. We all walked over to the bowling balls to select which we were going to use.

As I was looking for one that was the ideal weight for myself, I noticed Jimin looking at me.

“Nice blouse, noona. It compliments you very well,” he said.

I frowned and looked down. And that’s when I noticed it. I was wearing purple. Dammit. I internally groaned. Jimin was totally going to make this a thing.

Sure enough, Jimin’s laughter boomed.

I wanted to shove him. But I knew it would only draw attention and more people would get involved in the teasing.

Thankfully, only Jungkook was interested in Jimin’s laughter and Jimin didn’t tell him what it was he was laughing about.

I did my best to talk to my team and keep their focus away from Jimin.

As we strategized, the door to our private room opened. We looked up and a good-looking guy wearing all black made his way over to us.

“What’s up everyone?” Jackson greeted the room.

We all shouted out pleasantries.

I was one of the first he got to. “You made it,” I said as I gave him a hug.

He held on for several seconds before letting go. “Hey, chica,” my friend, Jackson Wang, said to me with one of his many smiles. He turned to Namjoon and they dapped up. “Where you been, man? I invited you to boy’s night the other day and you said you were fully booked.”

They had a sweet friendship. It was a strange combination. Jackson was a jokester and Namjoon tended to focus more on work rather than play. They were good for each of them. Jackson quieted down with Namjoon and Namjoon loosened up with Jackson.

Namjoon smiled at the teasing. “I finished a few things early. How you been, man?”

This was another part of Namjoon I enjoyed seeing. His way of speaking and physical stance changed around Jackson. Namjoon already had a cool demeanor but around certain people—like Jackson—that coolness turned to swag. His body was looser, his stance slouchier, his chin higher, his legs further apart. More relaxed and himself. It made him kind of hot if I was being honest.

The pair continued to chat as the game started.

When the waiter came with our drinks, he placed them on a table near us, keeping a social distance.

A couple of us went and retrieved the drinks, me being one of them. Many of the group also wanted water, so I made my way to get some—there was a jug not too far away.

As I made my way back with several cups and a jar of water, I overheard Namjoon and Jackson talking. But it wasn’t the simple fact that they were talking that caught my attention, but that my name was brought up. I stopped in my tracks.

Their backs were to me as they faced the bowling alley, so they weren’t aware I was so close.

“Of course, you came today. Maya's here, so why wouldn't you be,” Jackson said.

Jungkook laughed.

“Huh?” asked Namjoon, sounding lost.

Jackson laughed. “Is he still in denial?”

Jungkook gave a nod. “Yes.”

“Seriously man, you need to make a move,” Jackson said. “Maya is a catch. She’s kind, cool, talented, intelligent—she can keep up with you. Not to forget, she's hot. Guys keep lining up for her. And one of these days, she’s going to find a keeper and you’re going to hate yourself. If you don’t think you have a shot with her, then I’m going to step in—”

Ewww. I knew Jackson was joking. We had been friends long enough for me to know when he was joking. But it still didn’t make me want to gag any less at the thought of him liking me. It was like hearing an annoying little cousin liked me. “Jungkook, can you come help me?” I wanted to stop this conversation, quickly.

Namjoon, Jackson, and Jungkook turned to me and saw me ‘struggling’—I was pretending to lose balance with the cups and jar in my hands.

They got to their feet and hurried over to me. I handed Namjoon and Jungkook the cups and gave Jackson the jar. He even offered his arm to guide me to my seat.

I knew what he was playing and I remembered his gross words from a moment ago. I noticed he sent Namjoon a sly look as he extended his arm to me.

“Fuck off, Jackson,” I said in English as I swatted his arm and made my way to our seats.

He laughed.

“Namjoonah—you’re up,” called out one of our friends.

Namjoon put down the cups and headed to the front.

Jimin, Jungkook, and Jackson began to tease him. Normally, I was quick to quiet them down, but I kept playing Jackson’s words to Namjoon in my head.

You need to make a move.

What move was he talking about? Did he mean romantically?

In the years of me living in Seoul, some of our friends had made remarks about Namjoon and I getting involved, but it normally was in jest—or so it seemed to me. While Jackson had used his joking tone when he said he would ask me out, he certainly sounded serious with everything else.

As I observed Namjoon toss his bowling ball down the lane and miss all ten pins—twice—I replayed Jackson’s words, unsure how I felt about them.

For the next two hours, I did my best to forget the words. We managed to have a good time during the game. We all mostly sucked—except for Jungkook and Jackson—but we enjoyed the company…and drinks. Jackson ordered me another when he saw I had finished the martini. I caught Namjoon eyeing it. I knew it bothered him when I drank before driving. His neck was a little tense and was pretending to be engaged with whoever was up next.

I made sure to not have more than one sip from Jackson’s drink. I didn’t want to be rude to and not at least drink some of it.

The game was over a short while later. Most of us stayed to chat, but eventually, we all dispersed.

Namjoon, Jackson, Jimin, and I were the last ones to leave. Jungkook had left in his own car, hurrying home to his girlfriend and puppy.

The four of us who remained finally headed to the door.

Jackson had his arm around my shoulders. “Why don’t you guys come over? I’m meeting with Jinyoung and Bam. We’re gonna have some more drinks.”

“We have a few meetings tomorrow,” explained Jimin with a slight pout.

“Just one drink,” Jackson insisted.

Jimin turned to Namjoon, “Do you want to?”

Namjoon gave him an encouraging nod. “Go if you want. Enjoy yourself. I really need to get back to the studio. I’ll call another car.”

Jackson let out a grunt. He pulled me a little closer. “You’ll go, right Maya? I know if I can get you to come over, Mr. Workaholic will come also come.”

“He likes to work, leave him be,” I defended Namjoon.

Namjoon sent me a small smile of appreciation.

“And I really need to call it a night. I have a few things to work on as well,” I said before Jackson could try to persuade me.

We were about to exit our private location, so I stepped away from Jackson’s embrace. There would be people who would instantly recognize the guys and I had to make sure I kept my distance. “I’ll let you all leave first.”

I gave Jackson and Jimin a hug as Namjoon said he was going to call a car.

Jimin and Jackson looked at each other and shared a smile and look.

Namjoon shook his head to the side and took out his phone to make a call.

Jackson and Jimin waved to us as they left the room, big grins over their faces.

It would be another ten or fifteen minutes for a car to get to Namjoon. We were alone until then.

“I really don’t want to leave you,” Namjoon said suddenly.

I frowned at him. “That came out of nowhere.”

“Doesn’t seem as if you’ve fully sobered up,” he said as he looked at me intently.

“What makes you say that?” I asked. I didn’t even feel a buzz.

“Girl, your face is flushed,” he explained. “You talk a big talk, but you’re a lightweight.”

I rolled my eyes, knowing he was teasing. We both knew damn well I was good at holding down my liquor. “Get dumplings with me, then.” I reached for his overalls and pulled at them lightly. It was a slightly flirty move, but I did this to him at times.

He smiled back as he let his body be pulled towards mine. He usually shied away from my advances, but this time, he was giving in. “Let’s order delivery and get a cab to the dorms?”

He was so close he was almost hovering. I felt a sudden shiver. “I like driving myself.”

He shook his head, but a smile lingered touched his lips. “What’s up with that? I don’t get why you always have to be the one who drives.”

I looked up into his chocolate-warm eyes. How was it that I felt like telling him everything? “Dr. Rob says that it’s due to childhood trauma. Any time I can have control—I take it. As a kid, I didn’t feel secure with the adults around me—they were way too chaotic. When I’m not in control, my anxiety kicks in.”

Everything always pointed to childhood, didn’t it?

Namjoon didn’t say anything for a moment. He seemed to take in and try to understand what I had just said. With a soft expression, he said, “I’m sorry for not understanding before.”

As always, his apology was sincere.

“The dumpling place is close. Let’s walk there and pick some up?” I asked, looking down and kicking his combat boot lightly.

Namjoon let out a groan, but not because of my kick. “I’d like to, but…”

“People will see.” I finished for him.

He simply sighed.

Most of the time, it was amazing being best friends with Kim Namjoon. Not a moment with him felt dull or wasted. But there were times I was reminded that he was also RM, leader of the biggest K-Pop band in the world. If I were to be openly friends with him in the public eye, our privacy would only get smaller.

I really wanted this whole COVID shit to end. Then we could take a trip together to a place no one knew us and we could enjoy each other’s company. We had already thought of a few places we could travel to once things went back to normal. Now all that was left to do was wait.

“Just bring the dumplings over to the studio. I have makgeolli.” He was trying to bait me with one of my favorite drinks. Damn him.

“Didn’t you say you needed to work on a few things tonight? And you have meetings in the morning,” I reminded him.

“It’ll only be for a few hours. I just need five hours of sleep,” Namjoon explained.

I really didn’t want to be the cause of his little sleep. Plus, I had my own work to think about.

“Come on…” He reached over and poked my side. “Just one drink.”

I looked at him and he suddenly had a puppy look on his face with his pouty lips. He knew I couldn’t say no to him now. I smacked him lightly. “Damn you. Fine. One drink!”

He smiled in victory.

“I’ll go pick up the dumplings. Meet you at the studio in about 30 minutes.” I set off to the dumpling place and ordered for us as he waited for his car.

We met at RKive a little more than half an hour later.

He had changed out of his clothes again. He had on some Gucci sweatpants with a simple white t-shirt. He had taken off his combat boots and put on his comfy slippers.

There were small bowls, ladles, and makgeolli ready by the time I stepped into his studio. As I placed the food on the small table, I had a small doubt looking at the makgeolli.

Namjoon missed nothing. “What?”

“Huh?”

“You have that look on your face,” he said simply as he opened the bag of food and began to take out the dumplings.

“What look?” I didn’t like people analyzing my face.

He chuckled. “You’re not sure of something. You made a face.”

It was irritating sometimes that he knew me so well. Only sometimes. “I don’t think the makgeolli is going to go well with the dumplings.”

“I have sake,” he suggested.

I nodded. That would work. Makgeolli would have to wait for another day.

We drank one ochoko each. Neither of us was a heavy drinker, just did so occasionally. It was another thing we had in common. We liked liquor for the taste of it, not so much for the feeling it gave us. I personally had never been drunk; too afraid of being out of my own control. I had a feeling this was one of the main reasons Namjoon also didn’t get drunk often either. We liked to have a clear mind so we would make logical decisions.

We ate a little but mostly chatted for a good hour before Namjoon forced himself to work. I was feeling light-headed, so I stayed and watched him work. I gave a few suggestions when he asked for opinions, but I mostly lay on the couch as he labored on the computer.

I didn’t get to see this side of him often. When he worked, he was mostly alone in the studio. It was one of my favorite versions of him: the hard worker.

He had put on an oversized hoodie, his hood wrapped around his head. Headphones were covering one ear as he looked intently at his screen. His left fingers stroked the keyboard every once in a while as his right hand skimmed the mousepad. His shoulders were hunched over as he listened to the beat. He muttered to himself every so often. He was so consumed in his craft, that he forgot I was there. And I couldn’t help but like the feeling. I was watching a version of him many didn’t get to see.

He let out a heavy sigh and began to stretch his neck, rotating round and round. He did a turn on his chair and his eyes landed on mine. He looked a little surprised at the sight of me. Then he let out a nervous laugh. “I forgot you were here.”

“Thanks,” I said sarcastically.

He got up from his chair. “Sorry.” He started walking over to me. “You look better, though.”

I gave him a look. “Are you saying I looked like shit?”

“You never look like shit.” He took a seat on the floor and leaned against the couch.

I pulled myself upright and threw my legs on the ground. “You looked cute working,” I admitted to him as I slid down to sit next to him.

He frowned. “How?”

I shrugged. “You were fully engrossed; very focused. It’s nice to see how that genius brain of yours works while you’re creating something.”

He shook his head slightly. “I’m not that smart.”

“Your IQ says differently.”

“That was just a test. A piece of paper that doesn’t apply to real life—real art,” he said with all seriousness. “You and Yoongi create amazing music that I never could. You play multiple musical instruments, you can carry full conversations in three languages, and you have more education than I do—a bachelor’s degree. You’re smarter than I am.”

“There’s a difference between genius and smart. I know I’m smart. But that came with great difficulty. I’m not naturallysmart—I needed a lot of private tutors and lessons to get me there. I had the luxury of growing up with opportunities—my parents were wealthy. I had tutors to assist me. But you have the kind of brain that very few are born with.”

He opened his mouth to argue, but I shut him up it with my hand. “I don’t want to hear it.”

I was so close to him, I could see the black streaks in his deep, warm cocoa irises. He had such deep brown eyes, it was surprising to find they weren’t as dark as I thought they were.

It took a while to notice I had moved closer to him. So much so, that I could feel his breath on my face. I pulled back, feeling embarrassed.

He looked a little off as well as he looked at me. Had I made him feel uncomfortable? Dammit, this crush I had on him was lasting way too long this time around. It was getting a little too out of hand.

He kept staring at me, as if he wanted to say something but was holding back.

“What?” I asked instinctively.

Namjoon was about to say something, but his phone buzzed. He let out a grunt and read the message, making him give out another grunt. “Sorry, I told Rabbit I would send this to him by midnight.”

I remembered where I was and checked the time. It was well past midnight. “It’s ok. I should really get going.” I got up.

He did the same. “Let me at least call you a car. Please.”

His eyes were pleading so much and it was pretty late. Seoul was pretty safe, even this late at night, but I didn’t want to worry Namjoon. “Ok.”

Relief spread across his face. He made a quick phone call. My car would be in the parking lot in a few minutes.

“Are you busy this weekend?” he asked.

I shook my head. “Wanna visit another museum?”

Museums and nature were Namjoon’s church. It kept him sane and stable. He had his trouble with depression. He got lost too much in his thoughts that if not kept in check, those thoughts would turn dark. He had admitted to me if he went without going outside for a long time, those dark thoughts would start consuming him. So, at least once a month, I went with him on either a museum trip or a hiking trail.

“I was thinking more of a hike,” he answered.

“Sure. Will Yongrae and Hakun be there?” I asked, referring to two friends he shared his love for art and tended to go with him almost everywhere.

“I’m sure they will.” He got a message on his phone. “Your car is ready,” he told me.

I gathered my things and began to head to the door.

“Text me once you’re home,” he said as he followed me.

We smiled goodbye and just like earlier today, he watched me leave from his doorway.

As I made my way down to the parking lot floor, my heart sped, and my breathing became heavier. What the hell was happening? I had actually leaned in. Our faces had been just a few inches from each other. God, I needed to get it together.

I vaguely recalled the ride home and even less, how I got to my front door. My mind swam around my feelings for Namjoon.

My body started to feel the weight of the long day by the time I stepped into my room. I felt exhausted from bowling and mentally tired from the worry. I had a feeling that despite the million questions floating in my head, my body was going to pass out soon.

I threw myself on my bed and wrote Namjoon a quick message, keeping my promise.

Me: Made it home.

Moni: Goodnight. Sweet dreams.

His response was quick but short as if he had been waiting for my message.

I fell asleep, smiling at the thought of him waiting for my answer.

Throughout the night, I held onto my phone like it was a blankey.

Chapters: 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - 13 - 14 - 15 - 16 - 17 - 18 - 19 - 20 - 21 - 22 - 23 - 24 - 25 - 26 - 27 - 28 - 29 - 30

MASTERLIST

#bts #bangtan sonyeondan #rm #rm x reader #friends to lovers #friendship #jackson wang #eventual smut #eventual relationship #InTheMiddleOfTheNight #Spotify #rm x maya

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